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ninii-winchester · 2 months

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Unveiled Sorrows (Part 4)

Pairing : Dean Winchester X Reader, Sam Winchester x Reader (platonic)

Word count : 3.6k

Warnings : spoilers s1-5, angst, so much angst, violence, language, mentions of pregnancy, unedited.

A/n : This series follows canon plot line but some scenes might happen differently or be completely changed. Check the warnings for each part before continuing.

I DO NOT GIVE PERMISSION TO COPY MY WORK, TRANSLATE IT OR POST IT TO ANY OTHER PLATFORM. REBLOGS ARE APPRECIATED.

It had been a few weeks since the boys have been on the road. They called often. But it was mostly Sam. Sometimes to ask for help in research or sometimes just to make sure she's okay. Sam informed Y/n that there might a way to stop the apocalypse, as Gabriel told them, they can throw Lucifer back into his cage. The key to the cage being the rings from the four horsemen. Luckily they already had two of them. They just had to get the other two.

Bobby went out to help them with a witch problem. More like to get help himself. Cas hung around while Bobby was gone.

"How're you doin', Y/n." He asked the girl.

"I'm good honestly." She smiled. "Maybe after Lucifer is back in the cage, we could have a somewhat normal life."

"You're right." Cas replied.

"Cas I'm sorry." Y/n started. "For the times I've been mean to you. I know you were doing what you thought was right."

"It's alright. I understand." Cas said with a smile.

Bobby came back the next morning and he looked solemn. Y/n noticed and she knew something was wrong.

"Alright spill." She said sitting in front of him. The older man just sighed and looked away. "What did they do now?"

"Those idjits are trying to kill me.." He exclaimed. "How did you put up with all that all these years?" He asked.

"You get used to it, Bobby, Cmon tell me what is it now?" Y/n smiled thinking it can't be that bad.

"Sam wants to say yes." Bobby stated.

"What?" Y/n exclaimed standing up from her seat. "Why? I thought we had a plan."

"Yeah but you don't expect Lucifer to jump in out of the goodness of his heart, do you?" Bobby asked rhetorically.

"Yeah so what he's gonna sacrifice himself? What did Dean say about this?" Bobby looked away giving her the answer. "You've got to be shitting me! Dean agreed??" She exclaimed.

"I think this might actually be good idea." Cas spoke for the first time.

"Cas, not a good time buddy, lord so help me i will rip your lungs out." Y/n snapped.

"Technically that's not possible since I'm an angel. Although it would be inconvenient since I'd have to find another vessel." Cas replied his in monotonous voice.

Sometimes she hated the Angel. She left the room without a word. She can't believe Sam would suggest something like but, no wait she can because he's dumb like that. What she can't believe that Dean and Bobby are actually considering it. She slammed her foot on the car infront of her, cursing in frustration.

The boys didn't come back for atleast another week. Y/n heard the Impala pulling up in driveway and she knew they're here. She stood at the bottom of the staircase and watched as the door opened and walked in Dean. She didn't know what she was hoping for but a nod of acknowledgment just wasn't it. Dean made his way to the main room without a word. Sam entered the house few moments later.

"Hey Y/n." He greeted her and her mind went haywire. Her anger flared and all she saw was red. She was angry and upset, Dean's behaviour added fuel to the fire. Before she knew she took a step forward and punched Sam in the face causing him to reel back. He held his nose and hissed.

Dean came rushing to Sam's side and Bobby wheeled to see what the commotion is about.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Dean asked angrily.

"Me? What is wrong with you two. All of you?" Y/n screamed. "You're going to say yes to Lucifer? You're gonna let him take you?" She asked incredulously looking at Sam.

"Y/n i know it's a hard pill to swallow but we don't have another choice. You can't just expect to ask him nicely and he'll jump in." Sam understood she's upset. He understands she can't let her best friend go. He put his hand over her shoulder but she shrugged it off and went to the main room. The others followed her behind.

"There has to be another way. Why do you have to sacrifice yourself?" She asked throwing her hands up.

"One life for seven billion lives. I don't think it's a bad bargain." Sam replied softly.

"What about us, what about me and Dean, your family?" She felt her lip quiver. "Why do you think it's your responsibility to be the one saving the world.?"

"You know damn well I started the apocalypse. It is my responsibility." Sam replied feeling himself getting angry.

"And you don't have anything to say about this?" She turned to Dean hoping he'd say something. When he didn't say anything Sam spoke.

"Look, Y/n there is no other way, we have War and Famine's rings, we're gonna get Pestilence's and Death's rings. I say Yes to Lucifer, We open the cage and I jump in."

"And you think he'll let you do that? You think he's not gonna take over your body as soon you say Yes." Y/n countered.

"It's worth a try." Sam replied.

"No it's a stup-"

"ALRIGHT ENOUGH." Dean's loud voice boomed making her flinch a bit. "You need to stop, you hear me? This is our decision to make. We were chosen for this and last I checked the world doesn't revolve around you." Dean said directly looking at Y/n.

"Dean." Sam said trying to calm his brother but the older Winchester didn't waver.

"I suppose the decision has been made. We don't need your input. Either you help or you walk out. The door's that way." Dean said looking into her eyes, pointing towards the door.

"You watch what you're saying, boy." Bobby spoke for the first time in a while. "Need I remind you this is my house." Dean looked away at Bobby's stern voice.

Y/n didn't speak nor did she breath, how could she. She felt as if her heart has been ripped out of her chest. She didn't cry, everything inside her wanted her to scream and yell. To breakdown and hope that its a terrible nightmare that would be over soon.

"Is this your final decision?" She asked the same question she asked him after everything with Alistair went down. A single teardrop slid down her cheek.

"Yes." Dean replied. Unnerving and firm in his decision. In that moment she knew it was over. Everything was over. At this point who was she even kidding, there was nothing to begin with. At his confirmation all she did was nod her head. And she made her way up to her to room. The main room fell silent as she left.

"Dean what the hell?" Sam exclaimed and Dean left the room without a word.

Y/n didn't come out of the room the whole day. Bobby couldn't go up to check on her and Sam didn't know if she wanted to see him. Dean however remained indifferent. Sam grabbed a beer from the fridge and went outside. He felt like he was going to suffocate inside. He sat on the hood of one of the many cars present at the yard. He heard footsteps and looked to see Y/n coming outside. She stopped in her tracks when she noticed Sam sitting there.

"Sorry I'll just go." She said softly before turning back.

"Y/n-" Sam called out to her. She turned to look at him. "Please stay." His voice was barely above a whisper.

"Sam-"

"Please." She nodded and made her way towards him and he helped her up. The two of them sat in silence. Dean saw Y/n and Sam talking, sitting on the hood of a car. He couldn't help but eavesdrop.

It was quiet for moment before Sam spoke, "I'm sorry." She didn't look at him nor did she say anything. "I'm sorry it came down to this. I wish things could've been different." She still didn't speak but looked at him. "I know it's hard for you to accept and i know if i were in your place I'd react the same way hell even worse. But you have to know this is my redemption, for what I did. I set him loose and I have to be the one to send him back."

"I understand Sam." Dean heard her say. "Truth is, I was being selfish, I didn't want to lose my best friend. I didn't want to lose my family, but the real truth is I realised that I never had one." She tucked her knees to her chest. "I found out the hard way but all in good time." She smiled even though she felt her heartstrings were seconds away from snapping.

Dean felt like his whole body was on fire as he heard her say that. He knew what he did, and he knew what he said. But he had to keep her away. He couldn't let her get hurt, so it doesn't matter if she walks away hating him. What matters is she walks away. Alive and Safe.

"That's not true Dean...he just... he didn't mean it. He's angry. He might not show it but the decision is affecting him too. He didn't mean any of it." Sam tried to explain.

"You and I both have been with him long enough to know he meant what he said." Y/n looked into Sam's eyes, her eyebrow raised and lips tugged upwards. Her face screamed are-you-really going-to-argue-you-know-i-am-right. Sam looked away because deep down, he knew Dean meant it. His posture, the way he spoke, it was familiar to him. "I assume this is goodbye?" Tears filled her eyes as she asked.

"I wish it wasn't." Sam replied pulling her into a bone crushing hug. Y/n was thankful that they were sitting so he didn't crush her stomach. However his hands were tightly wrapped around her shoulder and her's around his torso.

"I wish i knew what to say to make you stay." She sobbed in his chest. Sam couldn't help but let a few tears roll down down his cheeks and onto her hair. "Please don't go Sammy." She cried, her body shaking with intensity.

Dean wished he could join them, he wished he could comfort them both, he wished he could tell them that's all gonna be okay. But his feet were glued to ground. The only thing he wanted to do was protect his family. He failed to protect Sam but he knew he had to protect her so he made a decision and he's going to stick to it.

"I have to. But you have to promise me you'll take care of yourself yeah? You won't be reckless." He pulled away to look at her. "As much as I love you I have no desire to meet you on the other side anytime soon. You hear me?" He joked and it made her chuckle through her tears.

"Bold of you to assume I’m going to Hell.” She tried to joke but it only made her cry more. “I promise. I'll be safe." She sniffled as they pulled apart. "I'm leaving." She told him.

"What? Where?"

"I don't know." She shrugged.

Dean has never felt so broken before. The two people he loved the most in his life are leaving. And he can't do anything to stop either of them. Life has always been a losing game for him. But being ripped off of his family, all at once it was too much to bear. He didn't know how long he could hold on so he went inside. He couldn't hear it anymore.

A month has passed since Y/n left Bobby's house. Much to the older man's dismay. Last thing she knew before leaving that the boys were searching for Pestilence. She had been living in a motel room that she had booked for a month. She went to see a doctor as well, and found out she was three months along now. She was lost in thought staring at the ultrasound picture when her phone rang. Her heartbeat accelerated as she picked up the phone. It said Cas. She pondered whether to answer or not.

"Hello." Her voice shaky as she answered.

"We have the key." The angel spoke. "We're going to Detroit." He spoke.

"What do you want me to do Cas?" She asked, she hoped Dean had asked him to call her. She knew he was too stubborn to call herself but she hoped.

"I thought you'd want to know."

"Did they tell you to call me?"

"No. It was me." Her hopes were shattered.

"Alright Cas."

"Will you come?"

"No." With that she hung up. She couldn't go. What would she even do? Watch her best friend jump into the hell fire? She'd pass.

As Sam and Dean drove to Detroit, the tension in air was so thick they could cut it with a knife. Dean kept his focus on driving and Sam kept fidgeting with his fingers. He couldn't take it anymore.

"Dean." Sam turned to his brother.

"I'm not doing the goodbye crap." Dean replied without looking at Sam.

"You have to listen to me." Dean raised a brow and urged him to continue. "You have to promise me you won't try to bring me back." Sam said with urgency.

"What? I never agreed on anything like that."

"Dean. No, you have to promise me that you won't bring me back. You get out."

"Out?" Dean questioned.

"Out of Hunting, Dean, you go back Lisa. Live that life you always wanted to live. I just want you to be happy man, I hope by some miracle she takes you back."

"What about y/n?" Dean asked subtly.

"What about her? She left. I hope she's happy wherever she is. But I can't have you trying to find her." Sam said seriously.

"Why not?" Dean side eyed Sam.

"Because then you two will try to bring me back. I need you to get away from this life Dean. I need you to promise, you'll go back to Lisa and you'll live the apple pie life." Sam explained. "Don't try to find Y/n again, I just want you two to be happy. And if you two keep trying to bring me back, you won't get out of this life." Dean looked at his brother and his heart raced a thousand miles per hour. "Promise me Dean."

"I promise."

Y/n paced back and forth in her room. She can't seem to get it all out of her mind. Damn you Cas, she cursed grabbing her stuff and her car keys. She threw her things in the backseat and left for Detroit.

For Dean, it all happened in a blink of eye yet it felt like time had slowed down. They met up with Lucifer after Sam had chugged down all that demon blood. Sam said Yes which allowed Lucifer to get inside Sam's body. Dean threw the key at the wall and said the incantation to open the cage. He saw Sam fighting for power over his body but then Sam said the incantation to close the cage. He took the key off the wall and pocketed it. Lucifer had taken over and Sam was gone. They lost.

The war was going to happen and there’s nothing Dean could do. He had the power to keep it at bay but then the angels had brought in Adam and Micheal had taken over him. The war was now inevitable. Millions of people were going to die. Michael and Lucifer will fight in Sam and Adam's bodies.

Dean called Chuck to ask him if he saw what happened and Chuck said he did. The Winchester asked the latter if he saw the outcome of the war but he denied saying he couldn't see that far. But he told him he knew when and where it'll happen.

"Where Chuck?"

"Tomorrow high noon, at Stull Cemetery." Dean hung up and revved the engine to meet up with Cas and Bobby. He couldn't sit there and wait for a duel to happen between two angels. He had to do something.

Y/n drove as fast as she could to reach Detroit and she saw Cas calling. She answered the phone keeping her eyes on the road.

"Cas?"

"We lost."

"WHAT?" She stomped the brakes. A screeching sound was heard.

"Sam couldn't take over his body. Lucifer closed the cage and took the key. Michael and Lucifer will fight." Cas told her.

"Wait how? Dean said he'd never say yes to Michael.." Cas cut her off.

"They brought in Adam."

"You know your kind is a bunch of assholes?" Y/n growled.

"I know, I wish things..!" Cas stopped talking as he heard Dean calling his name.

"Cas.. Bobby." Dean said approaching the two. Cas didn't hang up just shoved his phone back inside his pocket.

"What's going on Dean?" Bobby asked.

"I'm going to stop this war." She heard Dean say.

"What? You don't even know where or when it will happen" Cas replied.

"I know. Tomorrow noon, stull cemetery."

"But it's not possible. It's Michael and Lucifer. You can't stop them." Cas said solemnly.

"I can't just sit here and wait for destruction. I know I can't stop them, but my brother's in there. I can try." Dean said getting into his car.

Stull cemetery, Noon.

Y/n repeated those words in her head and she stepped on the Gas. She had to be there. She arrived there at before anyone else did and hid behind the bushes. She saw Sam walk in the cemetery but it wasn't her Sam anymore it was Lucifer. She watched as Adam appeared out of nowhere. It wasn't Adam anymore it was Michael.. The two talked for a while their voices getting louder and then she saw The Impala driving in , music blaring from the speakers. Her heart squeezed at the sight of Dean.

"Hey. We need to talk." He said walking towards Sam/Lucifer.

"Dean, even for you, this is a whole mountain of stupid." Lucifer said.

"I'm not talking to you I'm talking to my brother." He replied.

"You're not a vessel anymore." Adam/Micheal said.

"I just need five minutes."

"You have no right to be here. You're no longer a part of this story." Michael walking towards Dean when Cas called out to him.

"Hey, ass-butt." And threw a molotov cocktail at Michael but it was made of holy fire, which made him disappear. This made Lucifer angry.

"Castiel, did you just Molotov my brother with holy fire?" Lucifer snarled at Castiel.

"No?" Cas answered, if it wasn't an apocalyptic situation Y/n would've laughed.

"No one dicks with Michael other than me." Lucifer said before disintegrating Cas to nothing.

Lucifer then moved towards Dean and grabbed him by the neck. Bobby shot at Lucifer to which he just flicked his hand and cracked Bobby's neck. Y/n couldn't just watch anymore. She jumped out from the bushes as Lucifer kept punching Dean. He threw him against the car and bashed his face with his bare hands.

"Dean." Y/n yelled as she ran towards him.

"Oh hello there darling." Lucifer said in a sickening voice. "I knew someone was missing when these two showed up. You were in Carthage weren't you?" He asked.

"Let him go." She said staring down at Lucifer. Dean was brutally beaten. His face was swollen and bloodied. His eyes were barely visible due to all the swelling on his face.

Lucifer threw Dean on the ground and he collided with the Impala. He groaned as he hit the car. He watched as Lucifer walked towards Y/n.

"Sammy don't do this please." She begged hoping he's in there listening.

"Sammy's not home darling." Lucifer snarled as he grabbed her by the neck. Pulling her off the ground. "You know I could've let you two live if you'd just stay away. I care about Sam and I know you two mean a lot to him. But you're so annoying, you two." Y/n gasped trying to get his hands off her.

"Sam please." She cried.

"Sammy." Dean groaned. "Let her go."

He looked at Dean and his gaze fell on the an action figure stuck in the Impala, something flashed in Lucifer's eyes and he let Y/n go. She gasped as she dropped to the ground. Coughing up as she tried to take as much air as she could. Lucifer looked at Dean and Y/n and the two looked back at him. It wasn't Lucifer. It was Sam. He immediately fished out the key from his pocket and threw it on the ground. He said the incantation to open the cage and it appeared on the floor. Sam turned to look back at Dean and Y/n. She was sobbing on the ground while Dean looked at Sam as if he was trying to remember his face. With one last look at his brother. Sam jumped. Michael reappeared trying to stop Sam from jumping in but he pulled him in too.

As soon as he jumped Cas came back to life. He pressed his two fingers to Bobby's head and brought him back to life. Castiel then walked to where Dean was and healed him completely.

"Cas, are you God?" Dean asked.

"That's a nice compliment but no." Cas replied. "But I believe he brought me back."

Dean nodded and looked around and saw Y/n still on the ground, sobbing. He turned back around and got into the Impala. He did what no one of them had expected. He drove off.

Tags:

@spnfamily-j2 @galway-girlatwork @queensilber

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jantostolemyheart · 2 months

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Fic #4

Title: Let Beauty Come Out Of Ashes

Fandom: Supernatural

Characters: Castiel, Dean, Sam, Bobby

Pairings: Castiel/Dean

Status: Complete

Sam heard raised voices coming from Dean's room. He went to check, but when he tried the door, it was locked.

He heard Dean's voice saying "Cas, I already told you, I'm not gay! So stop trying to kiss me!"

And Castiel's reply- "And I told you, you don't have to be gay to kiss someone or be with someone of the same sex!"

Sam sighed. Evidently Cas was trying to help Dean get through his internalized homophobia and it wasn't going so well.

"Just shut up and kiss already!" he shouted through the closed door, before shutting himself in his own room.

Dean rolled his eyes. But whatever he was about to retort was cut off as the angel kissed him. It was a brief and gentle kiss, but it left Dean flustered and confused.

He pushed Castiel away from him. "What the hell, man?"

Cas frowned. "I'm trying to prove to you what I said! Sexuality isn't black and white, straight or gay. Crowley, and Sam, are both pansexual. That means they like whoever they like, regardless of gender. I'm gay. Meg might be a lesbian. You're probably bisexual."

Dean stared at Cas, processing his words.

Dean snorted. "I'm not bisexual," he protested. "I'm straight! And you, cannot kiss someone, even just to prove a point, without consent!"

He opened the door and stalked angrily out of his room.

Cas followed, keeping pace. "I'm sorry, Dean. Look, could we try this again? Sit down, hear each other out, and go from there?"

"You've made your point, as have I. Now leave me alone, Castiel."

Cas inwardly flinched at Dean's use of his full name. "Fine, if that's what you want." He turned and disappeared, giving the hunter his space.

The days passed, turning into weeks, then months, with no sign of Cas.

Dean hadn't prayed to him since before the day Cas kissed him. Sam tried, but he was ignored, as usual.

Sam and Dean were on a hunt with Bobby, and it was going badly.

"I think you need to call your angel friend, Dean," Bobby said.

Dean grimaced. "Do I have to?"

"Well our other option is probably death. And I'd prefer not dying. So yes, you have to."

Dean frowned, but dialed the number. "You're talking to him," he told Bobby, before putting it on speaker.

Cas sighed when he saw who was calling. "What do you want?" He was not expecting to hear Bobby requesting his help.

"Fine, but as soon as it's resolved, I'm leaving." He hung up and materialized where they were, helping them sort out their problem.

Before Sam could talk to him, or get him to talk to Dean, he was gone.

Dean stared at where the angel was, a wistful expression on his face.

"...Dean. Dean!" Dean turned, to see Bobby calling to him. "Boys, we have to clean what we can, let's get to it.

After, we're going to get dinner and you're going to tell me what is going on between you and Castiel.

Your reluctance to call him could've put us in danger, and if this continues, it will again." Bobby wasn't angry, not yet.

But his tone was stern and left no room for argument.

After they ate dinner, Bobby ordered them some pie, then pointed his fork at Dean. "Talk," he commanded.

Dean sighed, and explained what happened.

"And this was 2.5 months ago?? Sheesh, you'd have thought something worse happened from the way you were acting."

Dean looked at him in surprise.

"Castiel shouldn't have kissed you. However I also understand his point of view.

You need to pull your head out of your ass, stop being an idjit, and realize that you do, in fact, love that angel.

And no, I don't mean platonically. We all can somehow see it, except you. Even he can, and we all know how bad he is picking up cues."

Dean just stared in shock at Bobby, a forkful of pie halfway to his mouth.

"So here's what's going to happen," Bobby continued. "When you get home, you're going to call Cas, and talk this through with him.

Sam will tell me if you have or haven't. And I'll know if you try and pull a fast one. Understood?"

Dean blinked, then nodded. "Yes, sir."

That evening, Dean called Castiel for the second time.

"What?" the angel snapped, irritated to see Dean's name on his phone again, and because Chuck got pissy with him again.

"Cas?" came Dean's voice. "Is everything okay?"

"You ignore me for two and half months, you don't get to pretend to care now. What do you want?"

Dean frowned at his angry tone. "Could we talk, please? About us?"

"What more is there to say? You more than made your point. Now leave me be," he glowered, even though Dean couldn't see. Cas hung up, even more irritated.

Dean's frown deepened, and a tear trailed down his cheek. Cas was being harsh, but he probably deserved it, didn't he?

He went and told Sam what happened, more tears sliding down his cheeks. From Dean's pained expression, Sam realized he was telling the truth.

He got up from the couch and hugged his brother tightly. "I'm sorry, Dean. You did not deserve to be spoken to like that.

I'll call Bobby in the morning, and we'll work this out, alright?"

He hugged Dean again. "For now, let's get some sleep."

Dean nodded and dried his tears. "Thanks Sammy."

"Any time, Dean."

He watched Dean retreat to his room before following suit.

Dean lay awake, mind churning despite how exhausted he was from the day's events. Eventually, he drifted off to sleep.

From a dark corner, Cas watched over him, soothing him whenever he had a nightmare.

By the time Dean woke up the next morning, Castiel was gone. His mind of that night was hazy.

He remembered having nightmares that faded quickly, but he didn't know who stopped them. Though he was pretty sure it wasn't Sam.

And it couldn't have been Cas, because they were currently on unfriendly terms.

He brought it up to Sam over breakfast, but the younger Winchester was equally as uncertain. Another thing to tell Bobby about, he supposed.

In the meantime, he turned his attention to his rapidly sogging bowl of cereal.

Sam called Bobby and told him what happened.

"Right. Give me the number for Castiel. I'll call him and give him a talking to.

At this point he's being unnecessarily mean. I'll talk to him and figure out what the heck is going on."

Sam gave him the phone number and hung up, before dragging Dean to the couch to watch TV while they had some relative peace and quiet.

Dean was just stirring his cereal and staring at nothing, and Sam decided to keep an eye on him in case he decided to be stupid.

All Bobby told Cas on the phone was to meet him in his living room. He then sat the angel down for a talk.

Cas explained everything from his side, and talked with the older hunter. Bobby took everything into consideration before reaching a decision.

"C'mon, we're going to the Winchesters. You and Dean are going to talk. I don't care how long it takes."

Cas nodded, and followed Bobby to his car. He fidgeted, nervous about how things would go.

Sam and Bobby sat in the living room, while Cas and Dean talked in Dean's room.

The two talked a while, about things not only about the attraction between them. Cas also apologized for kissing Dean.

When they talked about that, Dean still insisted he didn't feel that way.

Castiel sighed in frustration, but kept his face neutral. "Then I think it's best I stayed away for a while.

We both need time apart from each other, clearly, or things will go south between us."

Dean nodded, but was still unsure.

With that, Cas disappeared. As soon as he was gone, he let his tears fall freely. He cursed at himself, for falling so hard for Dean.

After Cas left, Dean sat heavily on his bed, wondering why he suddenly felt so empty, like something was missing now.

Dean slid to the floor, talking, praying to Cas immediately. "Cas, come back- Please- I think we made a big mistake.

Come back, please-" He was begging, crying, for the angel to come back.

Cas heard, but he didn't answer.

"Castiel! Please..." Dean begged him.

At that, Cas paused. If Dean was calling him Castiel-

He decided to go back. "Dean?" he said, voice gentle. "Dean, what's wrong? What do you mean by a mistake?"

Dean didn't answer, he just jumped up and wrapped his arms around Cas, burying his face in the angel's shoulder.

His sobs faded, tears absorbing into Castiel's coat.

Cas just held him, rubbing his shoulder gently. He risked pressing a couple of kisses to Dean's hair.

"I'm here, Dean. I'll stay, if that's what you want."

Dean nodded. "Please stay-" He didn't let go of Cas, staying like that for a while, the angel comforting him.

Cas wrapped his wings around them both, to comfort Dean.

"I'll stay."

#fanfiction #writers on tumblr #writing #supernatural #spn #destiel #dean winchester #castiel #sam winchester #bobby singer #funny how I can kinda write Destiel and Sam but fuck if I haven't nailed Bobby

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bloodsalted · 3 months

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Random headcanon time! (Sexy edition bc Cas is curious)

When did Dean lose his virginity? To whom? Was it something special? Did he become a womanizer right after, or did that take some time to develop?

alright. little warning for mentions of: se.x, age gap, unfair power balances and other more adult content which is already warned about on my blog as it has mature subjects all up over the place. thanks!

dean lost his virginity leaving the boy's home. he was sixteen and a barfly at a local place during a stop for a hunt a few months into him being back with john and sam was the one who introduced him what would lead him down that road of discovery. dean was there at the dive, winning money on cards while sammy was being spoiled with a good dinner from an off-duty bartender that took an instant liking to the boys and turned a blind eye to dean being where he wasn't supposed to be.

it was a small town. no one really cared. which is why the killings at the truck stop about twenty miles down the road were going unnoticed in their patterns throughout the years. john thought it was possible demon activity. turns out? vengeful spirit with a really, really gnarly tactic or two along the way. took his dad three days to get to it. nasty bugger. i digress..

sam had a babysitter that was sweet as could be. for free. and dean was two beers in cause the guys he was beating thought they could get him drunk pretty easy. get their money back. turns out? another beer later, dean was still sober and took most of their paychecks they were willing to 'donate to the cause' as dean put it.

he was on his way out the door. stopped at the bar to get some molasses cookies to take to sam since the place boasted it had the best ones in the county (so said the sign) when she saddled up beside him. asked him what he was doing there. how he managed to win all that money. and followed him outside.

she invited him to her car for a hit or two off a joint she had. dean, wanting to look like the bad ass he was projecting himself to be, went with her. choked down a couple of hits because he'd only done that stuff a few times before. he was buzzed when she kissed him. scrambled up his brain with how good she was at it. nothing like he girls he'd kissed before. she tasted like cheap whiskey. pot. and a breath mint.

half an hour later? dean was staggering back into the room with an ear to ear grin that the bartender thought was a mix of the alcohol and pot she smelled on him. sammy had no idea. just that dean was stinky and they needed to wash his clothes. kelly, the bartender, helped them with that in a washer inside the bar that was used for towels and whatever else. she 86'd the local from the bar the next night. unknown to dean. because his dad was bad a day later and they were gone.

dean never got the woman's name. if he did? he doesn't remember it. maybe it was bonnie or something close to that. it was nothing special. no romance. no repeat. he doesn't even know how old she was. but she had to be at least ten years or more older than him. he can remember her face. she was pretty in a way that small town women who belly up to the bar when their husbands are out of town look. he's got no clue if she was married or not. but he remembers her looking the type.

far as womanizing, CAS? that evolved/worsened over time. once dean realized that a normal life wasn't ever gonna be in the cards for him. or. rather. had it reinforced it'd never be? he kinda gave up on that whole finding someone thing and when the world got too much? s.ex was an easy escape. from town to town. distanced partner to distanced partner. with a brief time or two where he thought he might have the chance to have something knowing deep down he wouldn't? growing up the way he did. around the people he did. the projections he had? about himself. and life, how love worked for people like him and women/relationships in general? the mindset of just another piece of tail was way more simple, more fun, and a hell of a lot less heartache for the ones he did care about but knew he wouldn't ever be able to keep. he won't admit to half of that. chalks it up with a grin and a shrug. sometimes he wishes his first time mighta meant more than what it did. but! it is what it is. as he'd say.

#gahh! thank you for this!#it got long. :X #dean insp; headcanon #PERSONALS DNI #dean insp; exclusive headcanon

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vaicomcas · 1 year

Text

There are gifsets about this. But sometimes words show things more clearly.

-----------------------

Bobby: About that. I liked the kid. We fought together. But there's only one way this ends. Castiel: Bobby's right. We have to find Jack and help him. Bobby: What? That kid -- he killed Mary! Castiel: I know that. Bobby: Ah-ah. Don't say "but. Castiel: But he -- Jack may not even realize what he did was wrong. Bobby: If his human side is gone, you know what's left -- Lucifer. Now, if you boys want to sit around and talk, fine. But me? I'm gonna get on the horn to some of my people and go find that boy. Castiel: And what then? Bobby: An unstoppable monster who don't know right from wrong gets put down -- or the closest we can get to it. And anybody who don't know that needs to go back to school.

It's not just Dean Winchester the big hero, some random hunter from another world that Jack (and Cas) helped rescue also gets to talk down to Cas and "school" him? About how he should be on board with murdering his son? Cas wasn't given the chance to say a word back to this?

Dean: He's locked up, safe. He's in the Ma'lak box. Castiel: No! Dean: And that's where he's gonna stay. Castiel: Even after hearing what I said, you want to keep Jack sealed in a living death? Dean: He agreed to it. Because deep down, I think he knows it's best. Castiel: No. You're doing what Dumah -- You are manipulating him. Sam: Cas. Castiel: What? You just want to forget about him? Dean: I wish I could forget about him! After what he did? And you know what he can do. This is our only play.

SAM: Okay, the last time we found Jack, it wa—it was by praying to him, but that's not gonna happen again. DEAN: Yeah, you think? CASTIEL: You should never have tried to lock him away. DEAN: You know what? You're right. I never wanted to put him in that damn box. I wanted him dead. DEAN: He's dangerous, Cas, and you knew it! You've known it for a long time! But that's okay. You know why? Because me and Sam, we've killed just about everything there is. And this -- Jack -- oh, we'll find a way. Because he's just another monster. CASTIEL: You don't mean that. DEAN: The hell I don't. (Dean and Cas stare each other down for a moment and then Cas storms out of the room) DEAN: All right. So, I guess we got to find Jack. SAM: Yeah. Then what? DEAN: I don't know. Maybe we call Rowena, see if she can put together one of those, um, "soul bombs." SAM: The...thing you were gonna use against the Darkness? DEAN: Yeah, might actually put a dent in the kid. SAM: (looking troubled) Okay. (quietly)

Dean and Sam were going to kill Jack with a soul bomb.

They threw out the red herring of Chuck to erase all this. But I am not fooled. After this, there is no way Cas doesn't take up arms to defend Jack. Against the apocalypse world hunters, against the Winchesters.

#castiel #Cas is the only one with any humanity in this whole thing #cas compared Dean to Dumah #Dean critical #Sam critical #winchesters critical #alternate bobby critical #anti dean winchester #anti winchesters

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jinkieswouldyoulookatthis · 1 year

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Brace yourselves, I've got thoughts...

Okay, so I just rewatched Into the Mystic (11x11) and man oh man, the ending of this episode throws a weird left hook. This is kinda long, so under the cut we go...

So, as the boys wrap up the case and are saying goodbye to Mildred and Eileen, Mildred tells Dean that she's jealous of whoever she thinks he is obviously pining over. Earlier she'd given him the advice to follow his heart.

Pretty certain that the actual text is trying to talk about Dean's unsettling attraction to Amara. He had mentioned to Casifer earlier that there was something drawing him to her that might have been attraction or just the link formed by him carrying the MoC, but that he really wasn't certain what it was. So I think this is what all this is intended to be alluding to, but it kinda hits weird, ngl.

Now, I've seen folks who ship Destiel point to this as subtextual evidence that Dean is secretly pining for Cas. I do not find this to be a believable take simply because Dean is, let's face it, just not that into Cas, especially through this episode. Cas is possessed by Lucifer and acting hella strange, and Dean has barely noticed. So I'm scraping that theory right into the trash. Sorry, not sorry. That's just not a ship I can get onboard with.

But, and hear me out, if we look at the last Act of the episode we could put an entirely different ship spin on this.

Sam: You were right, by the way. Getting back on the job, it... It helped. Dean: Wait. Say that again. The -- that part about me being right. Sam: You're an idiot. Dean... When I was with Lucifer, he, um... He showed me things. It was like a highlight reel of my biggest failures. Dean: Yeah, he was messing with you. That's what he does. Sam: Give me a sec. I should've looked for you. When you were in Purgatory, I... I should've turned over every stone. But I didn't. I stopped. And I've never forgiven myself for it. Dean: Well... I have. Hey. That's in the past, man. What's done is done. All that matters now, all that's ever mattered, is that we're together. So... Shut up and drink your beer. You gonna be able to sleep tonight? Sam: Yeah. Yeah, I think so. What about you? Dean: Well, I still got some ringing going in my head, but nothing some good music can't wash out. Sam: You know, I still can't figure that out. I mean, Banshees go after the vulnerable, right? So why did it go after you? Dean: You're overthinking it. It was going after Mildred, it saw my gold blade, acted out of self-defense. Simple. Sam: Yeah You're probably right. Dean: I'm always right. Sam: Yeah, yeah. Dean: Night. Sam: Night.

So a classic brother heart-to-heart, complete with beers. Sam apologizes to Dean for not looking for him while he was in Purgatory, Dean forgives him and says, "All that matters now, all that's ever mattered, is that we're together."

Just after Dean says the bit about music washing out the ringing in his head, Sam stands up and starts to walk out of the room. Now, we can't really see Dean's face, camera is off behind and to the left of him, but we can see that his head stays up, he is looking in Sam's direction, and we can see his eyelashes. His head doesn't turn to either side, not even when Sam starts talking to him again, so he was watching Sam. His eyes look down and up a couple times as Sam turns back towards him. After Sam says "Night" and walks down the hall, Dean sits at the kitchen table and looks fucking worried.

In Sam's room we see Sam place a brochure for the retirement home the case was at into a box of mementos he has that has old photos of him and Dean and the school play samulet., along with an old baseball, pack of playing cards, a zippo, a pocketknife. The implication is, that maybe he and Dean will retire to Oak Park one day.

Then we see both of them, in their separate rooms, getting into bed. Dean gets in on the left side of his bed, Sam gets in on the right side of his. Dean lays there for a couple seconds, still obviously worried, and then sits up on the side of the bed again. He then makes this face, does this thing with his mouth that, I swear to god, is him remembering a kiss. Then he rubs both hands back and forth over his hair, like he's scrubbing at his thoughts and full on fucking broods. End of episode.

So even though we got like a lot of heavy co-dependent brother things in these few minutes, I'm still 100% certain Dean was thinking about Amara's kiss and is deeply troubled by whatever the hell kind of hold she has on him. He's not into her, but he is definitely feeling a pull and it is bothering him. That IS the text here.

But, there was still the way this last Act was shot that sends some pretty mixed signals. Because I didn't exaggerate any of this, I just watched it about 12 times to make sure I was remembering correctly. This is shot in a way that if you hadn't seen episode 9, would legitimately looked like Dean was vulnerable because of something to do with Sam. The two of them being mirrored by and compared to romantic couples is a long standing tradition of the show, and this looks like another example of that, is filmed like an example of that, but isn't actually about that, which is... weird, right?

Like, I could spin off on wincesty thoughts about what this scene is implying and it would be really easy to do, because the show's got some major wires crossed where these two's relationship is concerned.

So, yeah, those are my thoughts about that, make of it what you will.

#spn 11x11 #Wincest #gencest #weirdcest #all the cests #it's the cestist #don't blame me #that's just how the show is

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mlobsters · 7 months

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supernatural s14e8 byzantium (w. meredith glynn)

totally forgot about that alicia witt episode. is someone gonna burn up some soul for jack?

JACK Can you tell him… it's okay SAM Tell him yourself. He'll be back in a minute.

see i think i don't have a lot of lingering trauma from my dad dying when i was 16 from cancer, but like. they say this and all i can think about is my mom making me tell my dad, in his last days, unconscious in a hospital bed in our house, that it's okay. so, imagine that, but a hundred fold for all these memories associated with that. and then going through it again with my mom, so a new batch to add on to the existing set that still fucks me up. not many things poke at it, but when they do...

DEAN I can't. It's not right, Cas, you know? It's just-- It's not-- CAS What? It's not fair? I know that. But he needs you.

suck it up, fuckhead. okay i don't know if that's actually in character for him but i gotta believe he would understand that and not walk out. certainly not if he thought he was that close to dying. whatever, more opportunity for angst over not even being there when he passed. hospice gave us a list of signs that someone is gonna die soon. doesn't account for rapid decline due to loss of archangel grace though i imagine

(while i look for the post [13x17 apparently] where i talked about some music reminding me of bloodfest by brian reitzell and whether it was the same just now, reminded as they stand in this hallway, where are all the fucking apocalypse world people)

spn 14x08 / hannibal 3x6 / spn 13x17

didn't come to any great conclusion. similar technique. nothing nearly as interesting or pretty as brian reitzell's, but it's not a fair comparison. both the spn episodes the music was christopher lennertz, this episode it was with philip white as well.

and fuck whoever made the decision to cut from the big emotional moment of dean coming into jack's room after he has died with basically a jumpscare to the title card with the flapping wings.

and then basically a jumpscare to thinking sam is leaving to go do something monumentally stupid.

come on, not even a hug? group hug? something? if you're going to put me through this, at least throw me a fucking bone

not sure i can do this. small break because a montage of them having a mini wake basically, drinking, reminiscing set to licensed music. done having my buttons pushed.

well. that's one way to disconnect me from feelings, jack in heaven with..... the empty cg goo flooding in

spn 14x08 as lily sunder / alien (1979) veronica cartwright as lambert

hey, now that's a recognizable voice

DEAN We're talking about that kid's soul. SAM Not all of it. DEAN Oh, okay, then. Tell me you're not cool with this. CAS Don't you think Jack should decide for himself?

using jack's own soul to sustain the magic for his body, didn't see that one coming. and yet another spin on the merry go round of bodily autonomy arguments. if heaven wasn't busted, i imagine he'd want to stay. which might be more interesting. and visiting kelly, buh. thought i was done crying this episode.

the empty shadow guy crashed heaven just to get jack? hokay

SAM Lily, I-- I know you're upset, but you can still do the spell. LILY That wasn't the deal. I've got to go. SAM We have nothing to offer you, noth-- nothing to say, but… He's our kid! LILY I'm sorry. DEAN You know what I think? Burning all that soul? You're not even human anymore, not really. SAM Dean-- DEAN Otherwise, how could you ever, ever let anyone go through what you went through? The pain of losing a kid? Don't do this to us.

continue to be surprised whenever they textually acknowledge jack as their kid. it's a good thing, and dare i say a smidge subversive with their non-traditional family structure. it's nice.

and for this ridiculous anubis thing, maybe her helping them can tip the scales more in heaven's favor.

COSMIC ENTITY Castiel, you know how this goes-- the good souls here, the bad souls there. The angels are mine. CAS Enough. COSMIC ENTITY Stop interrupting! Start paying attention. I'm taking him. And where I'm taking you is worse than Hell… because at least Hell is something. Ohh. Ohh, God, they look scared. Does that hurt you? Good… because I want it to.

the manic bitchy weird thing they're doing with the empty thing is ... weird.

COSMIC ENTITY: Deal. Oh, but not now. No, no, no, no, no. No, you see, I-I meant what I said. I-I want you to suffer. I want you to go back to-- to your normal life and-- and then forget about this and forget about me. And-- And then, when you finally give yourself permission to be happy and let the sun shine on your face, that's when I'll come. That's when I'll come to drag you to nothing.

huh. ok.

JACK Why? Why did you do that? CAS Because I made a promise. Because I love you, Jack. And Sam and Dean-- they love you. And they are fighting for you at this very minute. I hope that… They don't need to know what happened here. What I did-- I'm-- I'm-- I'm at peace with my choice. I don't want them to worry. JACK I won't tell them. I promise.

so he gets to sacrifice himself and sam and dean don't get to know about it so they don't have the chance to fix it. ok

and as i expected, lily got her happy ending in death too. sacrifice and family reunions all around

lol naomi giving out michael's location, ok sure. cas oh so smoothly bypassing questions about why she'd give them that :p

DEAN And we know where Michael is. Not quite sure how you pulled that one off. CAS Well, we, uh-- we still don't know where Dark Kaia is or the spear.

laughed because even he made it sound like what he was saying was goofy. anyway. i think i'm finally warming up a little more to cas. making him vaguely consistent in characterization and not making horrible decisions all the time apparently helps. and just plain being around and participating in things

hopefully we're done pushing my real life terminal illness buttons because it's exhausting and miserable.

hope dean leaves mary another voicemail giving her an update that in fact jack is not dead anymore

#supernatural #spnwatch #spn 14x08 #spnwhinge #ish #christopher lennertz #philip white #meredith glynn #spn clip #spn musical score #spnhiky #hiky #veronica cartwright #alien 1979 #spn bloodfest-ish

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twofrontteethstillcrooked · 9 months

Text

Make the season bright

deancas post-12x07 au, fluff and angst, mutual pining. Season's Greetings, y'all! 🎄

(first posted to ao3 December 2021 but I never really put it here, so. I'm putting it here now 😊)

22 December

"Orders must be in today to guarantee local delivery by Christmas!!!" the email subject line said, with its three exclamation point emphasis.

Dean sat bolt upright in bed and squinted at the phone screen some more. If today was December 22nd, and he had no reason to think his phone had been hacked to display a false date, that meant Christmas was three days away. Less than three. Two and change, the day racing into the lower half of an hourglass like a storm scouring everything in its path with sand.

He fled his room and skidded down the hall so quickly he managed to rake his ankle against the doorjamb and yelped to announce his presence.

"Dean," Cas said, eyes big as gumdrops. "What's wrong?"

"Ouch." Dean grabbed up his mangled foot before realizing he was going to tip over in the process, and caught himself on Cas's doorknob. "You're still here."

Still here still here still here. Hi, Cas.

Cas stopped folding a towel. "Yes?"

He'd arrived a week ago. The fervency with which Dean wanted him to stay -- forever, whispered the voice in Dean's head -- was in direct contrast to Dean's ability to discuss this for even one-tenth of a second.

"Just. Good." Dean put his foot on the floor and looked at Cas standing there in Sam's old sweatpants (cut off at the cuffs) and one of Dean's better old hoodies (blue a shade darker than Cas's irises) and nearly let an avalanche tumble out of his mouth.

One calamitous weather metaphor after another, Dean thought. That's me.

He cleared his throat. "It's good you're still here because I forgot to tell you happy solstice yesterday. And." His voice cracked a bit. The bunker air was so dry in wintertime.

He tried again. "Christmas is this Sunday."

"Oh." Cas placed the towel on a stack of towels. "Sam thought maybe you weren't doing that this year."

Dean narrowed his eyes. "You guys talked about it?"

Cas seemed to sense a need for diplomacy. "He wasn't upset at the prospect you were going to skip it."

Dean winced, flexing his foot. "He wouldn't be."

"But you don't want to to skip it." Cas smiled, looking down at the bed.

"Of course not." Dean rallied his sanity. "Christmas comes but once a year, the most wonderful time of the year, even, ho ho ho and mistletoe, and all that."

Crap. He hadn't meant to mention mistletoe and would not be referencing it twice.

"What would celebrating Christmas entail?" Cas asked, with what sounded like a promising amount of genuine curiosity.

"Whole lotta festive food, for starters," Dean said. "Maybe a tree? Exchanging presents." He thought about it. "Spiked punch. Or mulled cider, or something." He replayed what Cas had said in his mind. "And you're family, so. You get to set some traditions too."

"Oh," Cas said. His cheeks went a little pink. "I don't… The impression Sam gave me is that you didn't really have many traditions for the holiday."

Dean snorted, to conceal how much he wanted to sidle closer. "Sam has a standing annual engagement as the Grinch, with an understudy gig in Scrooging."

Cas frowned. "Sam seems always ready and willing to be generous about helping people in need--"

"I just meant, he's pretty 'Bah, Humbug' about Christmas," Dean said.

"You might be missing the essence of that novel," Cas said, head tipped like he was about to start an advanced discourse on the nature of social responsibility or the torment of eternal regret, as though those were two themes that hadn't bashed Dean over the head pretty much every waking day of his life.

Dean held up a hand. "Let Sam feel about Christmas however he wants to feel about Christmas. We can be merry with or without his active participation."

He bounced on the balls of his feet for a second and was content enough that his banged-up ankle didn't protest. A cold draft of something close to shyness crept up on him as he watched Cas think.

Another thought pierced through. "If you have someplace you need to be instead, because of Lucifer--"

"No," Cas said. He took a breath and held Dean's look. "Not yet, anyway."

"Well, then," Dean made himself say, like he was a healthy person who just said stuff out loud, "let's go shopping."

However, first there was coffee, showering, more coffee, putting away laundry, a bacon sandwich for Dean and a glass of water for Cas. One more cup of coffee.

Dean savored the last bite of crispy pork perfection and hummed to himself.

"What is that?" Cas asked. "You've been humming it for twenty minutes."

"Huh." Dean drank the dregs of his coffee. "I don't know."

Cas cocked his head at him.

"Yeah, that's weird," Dean conceded.

He picked up his phone and dicked around with it until he found the evil so-called assistant that lurked inside it. He hummed as many bars of the chorus as he thought he knew.

The phone displayed Search Results: 87% match.

"Oh god," Dean said in agony.

"What did you find?" Cas sounded terrified for him.

It took all of Dean's strength to inform him, "It's by Perry Como."

"I'm sorry to hear that," Cas said, in a voice devoid of actual pity.

"You don't even know who Perry Como is," Dean sniffed.

Cas gave him a narrow look and took a very prim sip of water.

In what might have been the seventieth store they entered, the sole employee had the harried air of someone being menaced by vengeful ghosts or a pack of church ladies.

"Ma'am, I don't believe we have anymore of the dessert plates in stock, though we do have four of the soup bowls-- Yes. Yes, I will set those aside. No, the after-Christmas sale starts on Monday--"

After Christmas, Dean thought, passing the store's front desk with a pang of sympathy for the shopkeep who had a pencil sticking out of her hair like she'd stabbed herself in the head on purpose.

"--Will do. Thanks, Darlene." The shopkeep hung up and made a whoosh noise. "I am going to kill one of these uppity dipshits, so help me, Satan," she muttered to no one in particular.

Dean saw Cas flinch out of the corner of his eye.

The shopkeep pasted on a smile that appeared mostly sincere. "May I help you, dear?" she asked Dean.

"I'm just browsing," Dean said. With a gun to his head, he wouldn't trouble this frazzled lady old enough to be his grandmother.

"You were going to--" Cas started, waving from the other side of a curio cabinet.

Dean groaned inwardly. "You don't have any children's books for sale, by any chance?"

The shopkeep -- Sandy, according to her name tag -- perked up. "We do! A few still, anyway."

She came out from behind her desk to send him and Cas toward a back corner. In that booth was a shelf with a decently curated selection of kids' books from the early to mid parts of the twentieth century -- quite a bit before Sam's time, though Dean read through the titles on the worn spines just in case something interesting stood out. In between a grimacing Santa figurine and a jewelry box decorated with plastic holly leaves was a selection of junkier trade paperbacks.

"No luck?" Cas reached past Dean to pick up a yellow stoneware bowl; his hip pressed against Dean's.

Dean froze. He saw the bowl being turned over in Cas's large hands as though in a fugue.

He looked up to see Cas watching him, nothing but patience in his face. "Uh. No, um. I doubt Sam would find any of these--"

In forcing himself to look away from Cas, Dean'd seen something. He moved over and picked out a paperback with a faded green dogeared cover and a very pre-Nickelodeon illustration of two grubby children.

"It's perfect," he said, grinning at Cas.

Cas smiled back, game if confused. "One down," he said, like he was ticking items off a mental checklist. He glanced over his shoulder at a pegboard on the wall behind them. "Do you think Sam would like a hat?"

The slightly lumpy knitted toboggans were clearly homemade and came in an array of colors that could all be described as loud. "He likes to jog before breakfast, you know, like a freak, so probably," Dean said.

Nodding, Cas picked out one that was orange with a green zigzag around the bottom.

"Two down," Dean said. They took their finds to the shopkeep.

As Sandy rang them up, Dean saw Cas look at and look away from and look again at a tabletop tree, one of those faux vintage types with frothy white branches, decorated with golfball sized emerald green and candy apple red glass ornaments. A gold ribbon was threaded throughout, a spindly star tied at the apex. It was not exactly a towering behemoth of a tree, but it was awfully late in the season to go chopping down a balsam or a pine or buying one that was already halfway to kindling.

Oh there's no place like home for the holidays. Damn earworm.

Dean pointed down the aisle. "We'll take that little white tree too."

Sandy beamed at him. "Oh, I'm happy someone's taking it," she said. "It deserves a nice couple to enjoy it."

She scurried to the table to fetch the tree and Dean did not glance at Cas or say anything or even think anything. He was a blank sheet of paper, a bank of newfallen snow. He was fog and dissolving inside a descending fog.

Sandy was smart enough to give the tree to Cas, who took it with polite thanks.

Dean and he probably talked about something on the drive back to the bunker -- the weather, perhaps, which was by now worn-in levels of dreary. The tree was delivered to one of the library tables until Dean could think of a better place for it. Rain water trickling under his collar woke him up more quickly than a smack with a snowball would've. He wondered if he'd parked Baby in the garage or if he'd even turned her off. The bunker had some protective sensoring management thingy, though, didn't it? He and Sam wouldn't die of carbon monoxide poisoning overnight?

"Is there an agenda for tomorrow?" Cas asked, as though he hadn't noticed Dean's brain trying to leave his body and this whole infernal mortal coil through his nostrils.

Dean considered the question. Yes.

After a minute, Cas said, "Dean?" which, Dean guessed, meant Dean hadn't actually said anything.

"Yeah." There went that dry air again. His kingdom for a goddamn humidifier. "Yep. Um. Groceries. And finish up shopping." He drummed his fingers on the library table. "Probably. You. You don't have to get me anything, not at all -- like, I'm set." He refused to answer Cas's frown. "But I will probably need an hour in town. By myself."

Cas stood taller. "That's fine." His tone was as flat as a taupe paint sample.

Dean crashed onto the bed in an hour or two and laid there willing the snowglobe glitter sloshing in his mind to calm the fuck down already. He had almost achieved this as Sam stuck his head in the room.

"Busy day?" Sam said.

Dean jerked hard enough to make the bedframe rattle. "Fuckin'--" He rubbed his eyes. "Where've you been all day?"

Sam stepped inside with one of his aw, shucks attempts to seem short. "Movie. Told you that."

"Hmm. Yeah. What'd you see?"

The words that flowed from Sam's mouth were probably…European. Dean understood 'hallucinations' and 'Münchhausen' before Sam moved on to saying, "And the documentary went into a much more in depth discussion than I'd been expecting of dreams as illustration of quote, unquote, 'the fantastic' in cinema blah blah blah blah."

He had not actually said the blahs; Dean was merely an excellent translator.

"Okay," Dean said. He was reasonably convinced Sam had seen the world's most boring film and wasn't off somewhere plotting something catastrophic behind Dean's back.

If nothing else, Dean had spent the whole day with Sam's most trusted and chaotic collaborator, so.

"You talked to Mom lately?" Dean asked, busily untying his boot shoelaces.

"Ah," Sam said, in a knowing tone. "Yeah, she's hanging in there. Just finished up a case in Nebraska, I think. She's plotting revenge for your last word play, by the way."

"Squeezy, heh."

"Oh, don't like that."

"It has several perfectly respectable definitions, Sam. Grow up."

Sam rolled his eyes. "Nothing's come up on your radar, case wise, has it?"

"Nah." Dean checked his phone screen for alerts. "Nah. It's the holidays. Maybe the monsters are taking a beat."

He didn't mention Lucifer. Sam didn't mention Lucifer. Neither of them invoked their mother, or Cas, Amara or Chuck or that Arizonian night hag a month ago who'd been chewing on his neighbor's ear (detached from said neighbor, who turned out to be buried in the backyard) as Sam broke down the front door. It was almost comforting, the familiarity of not talking.

"Maybe," Dean said. "Glad we get to be home for Christmas. Spent enough of 'em in motel rooms."

"True. And Cas is here as well."

"He is," Dean said, mindful in stepping around the sinkhole in Sam's tone.

Sam gave him a look. Dean ignored it.

"Okay. I'm going to sleep." Sam waved and exited.

Dean sat with his feet flat on the floor. He stared at the wall until it appeared unlikely he would be able to punch a hole in it with his mind.

He sent his mom a quick text. "Hi. Hope you're well. Forecasters calling for snow Christmas Eve. Been a while since we had a white one."

Mary wrote back, "Ho ho ho!" plus a Santa emoji.

Dean put the phone on the nightstand and his head on the pillow.

23 December

Dean entered the kitchen the next day on a wave of violin music pouring forth from a bluetooth speaker. Cas had stuck pieces of scotch tape to the speaker's flat top, for easy access while wrapping, Dean guessed. The table where they ate was additionally cluttered with two boxes, a bolt of ribbon, a pair of scissors, and a scattering of tags. Cas was glaring at a large piece of foil wrapping paper printed with candy canes like it was Crowley.

He noticed Dean and his expression softened. He turned down the music. "This is harder to do than I had anticipated," he said in his deep voice, a bit sheepishly.

Dean poured another cup of coffee to give himself something to do other than what he wanted. And instead of ten things he might have asked, he said, "Whatcha listening to?"

Cas paused midway through sawing at an edge of paper. "Copeland. Rodeo."

"Rodeo like…a rodeo?"

"It's a famous ballet."

"About a rodeo?" Dean was lost enough he sat down on the stool beside Cas. Which, incidentally, was not the stool he'd intended to take.

"I am given to understand it's about a cowgirl looking for man." Cas resumed cutting, and moved on to folding, and furthermore to taping. The box he was wrapping began to look festive and not at all like the work of a skyscraper crammed into the body of an investment banker with subpar hand-eye coordination. "It's difficult for me to follow the synopsis of the storyline based only on the movements of the music. But it's humorous, and beautiful, at times."

He cocked his head at Dean. Dean sipped his coffee and hoped the light was bad enough that whatever blushing he was doing -- or flushing, that was more the thing, because the coffee was hot and full of legal stimulants -- wasn't noticeable.

"Sure," Dean said eventually.

Cas looked away with a small smile.

A text message *boing* interrupted the music for a blip. Cas turned over the phone and swiped the screen.

Dean could see an attached photo of Claire and Alex, cross-eyed and faces crammed near the camera. The visors of their respective baseball caps were festooned with plastic ornaments, one of which, on Claire's, was Bigfoot.

"Thx 4 the sasquatch & say hi to the dorks," Claire wrote.

"Hi back," Dean said, and Cas dutifully relayed the message.

"You're welcome," Cas also typed. "Merry Christmas to Jody and Alex as well."

He punctuated the end with a string of emojis so incomprehensible he had to have learned it from Claire.

Claire sent back a trio of crying-laughing smileys.

In a minute, Cas put down the phone, something vulnerable around his eyes that put a lump in Dean's throat immediately.

Before Dean could say anything, Cas changed the subject with, "The later in the day we head to the grocery, the more likely there is to be a crowd."

"Dude. Lebanon is not that big."

That statement should not have turned out to be the stupidest thing Dean had ever said, because he had said a royal fuckton of idiotic things in his cursed life. And yet.

Their shopping list had mostly been vanquished. For Christmas dinner, there would be ham and sides, beer, pecan pie with chocolate chips. The only bags of pecans left were large enough to make multiple pies, and though this was pleasing, the two men haggling over the last quart of egg nog in the nearby dairy case made the simple act of walking by them feel risky, like Dean was scaling an icy mountain ledge. Also, he'd wanted some nog. Alas.

"There's soy nog left," Cas pointed out.

Dean and the two hostile bros all looked at Cas with dismay. Cas's comment did pop the bubble of imminent violence. The bulkier of the nog hogs growled and pushed the carton into the hands of the other guy. A Christmas miracle.

"So that's no on the soy nog?" Cas asked Dean. Something about the look in his eyes was not quite innocent.

Heat shot up the back of Dean's neck fast enough it could've made an audible crack. He swallowed and wheeled away toward the other end of the baking aisle.

"I think we need one more dessert," Dean said, proud of how unaffected he sounded.

"I saw a recipe for cookies--"

"Yes?" Dean leaned toward him like a flower seeking sunlight.

Cas procured a torn scrap of candy cane wrapping paper from the depths of a trenchcoat pocket. "The recipe seemed very simple." He consulted a series of scribbles that may have been Enochian notation. "One cup each of creamy peanut butter and granulated sugar, and one raw egg. Unshelled."

"That's it?" Dean asked skeptically.

"According to the lore--"

Dean assumed that meant: Reddit, or some shit.

"--you stir until the egg is well incorporated. Roll spoonfuls into balls, press the balls onto a cookie sheet with a fork. Bake for ten minutes at 350 degrees Fahrenheit." Cas looked up at him in a way that made his eyelashes seem particularly dark and luxurious and distracting. "I don't mind peanut butter."

"You had me at a cup of sugar," Dean said, jolly as an elf who flirted with everyone and not just the guy he currently wanted to…

His breath stuttered for a second.

Bake cookies with.

A literal fact, and only that. No analogies, illusions, allusions, metaphors or euphemisms here.

Jesus fucking Christ.

Cas said, "The premade nut butters are an aisle away."

"We need a couple other things anyway." Dean girded his loins, the very loins he was otherwise disregarding entirely, as one would in a grocery setting and all other outings (fucking hell) with one's best platonic pal, and pushed through a clot of customers raiding the loose nutmeats tower.

There were fewer people in the new aisle, but also fewer available choices. Cas stood on tiptoe to grab the one jar of peanut butter in plain sight, and Dean pondered soup.

"Acorn squash or tomato bisque?" he asked.

On a delay, Cas said, "You know Sam will eat either."

Something about the way Cas clipped off the last word made Dean follow his line of sight.

Several feet away, a baby, not yet a year old most likely, was held on a woman's hip. The baby swung one foot back and forth as if sitting on a dock watching a turquoise lake ripple in northern breeze.

A tiny foot, in a tiny lavender sock.

One emotion and another crossed Cas's face far too fast for Dean to describe them, much less name them.

The baby's eyes were glued to Cas: anticipation.

Cas gave her a tiny wave. Her gummy, drooly grin was instantaneous.

The woman gave him a friendly smile and said, "She's never met a stranger." She crossed her eyes at the baby and the baby laughed. "Have you, Pattycake?"

The baby agreed by patting her adult's face.

Cas waved goodbye and the baby threw her hand up in an approximation of a high-five.

Dean took a breath for the first time in ages. "I'll get tomato." He tipped two cartons into the cart.

His shoulders felt tight. Concrete floors were hell on the ol' bones.

Cas seemed to twitch back into his body. He placed the peanut butter jar in the cart as well. He didn't avert his eyes from Dean as much as not seek him out. Dean exhaled against some somethingerother squatting on his gut. An out of context passage of Dickens floated up to the surface of his memory.

"...A little thing affects them. A slight disorder of the stomach…"

Yeah. That's all it was. Undigested beef. Wavy gravy. Whatever.

Still, he crowded next to Cas as they continued toward the check-out at the front of the store. There were indeed more and more customers arriving, right before dinnertime and this close to Sunday. It was a courtesy to conserve space.

Sam helped them unload groceries and even helped making and eating some sub sandwiches, and then he escaped the kitchen, probably to partake of nerdiness like reorganizing the magic spell ingredients room or discussing Proust with other nerds online.

"We're having ham on Sunday," Dean yelled down the hall at him. "Happy Christmas!"

"Sounds great," Sam yelled back, from wherever.

Dean rounded on Cas, who was fidgeting with the oven. "You have to press down on the dial and turn. No jangling," Dean said. "It's gotten loose or outta whack recently."

"Jangling?" Cas asked under his breath.

"No jingling either." Dean took down a big metal bowl and tossed it with a clang onto the metal countertop. He did the same with their one cookie sheet, which always looked to him like the Men of Letters had used it for target practice, and a metal measuring cup. "Cookie time, hell yeah."

The dough, such as it was, was funky thick. Not too terrible to work with. Forming it into balls seemed pretty simple. Cas used a fork to press tine-marks onto the tops with a concentration appropriate for advanced surgery. They put the sheet into the oven and closed 'er up, and leaned against the counter with the general air of two clueless guys waiting for a kid to be born.

Dean winced, as soon as he thought it.

He let himself settle. "Hey."

"Hmm," Cas said.

"How are you?" He looked over and caught the bloom of surprise on Cas's face.

"I'm fine," Cas said slowly, like Dean had asked a trick question.

"I mean." Dean didn't look away. "You had a rough time of it, with Lucifer. For months," he clarified, as though Cas might've forgotten.

"I knew what I was doing, Dean." Cas studied the stovetop. "With Crowley as well, even if that was… Not the same." He huffed out a breath. "At least working with Crowley… He never had control, of course."

It might've been a dismissal, of the kind Dean was an expert in providing, if not for the sadness in Cas's eyes.

Sadness. Resignation.

"I truly thought Lucifer could help us," Cas said. "But as usual I didn't--" He shook his head. "Everything with Amara and Chuck was so much bigger than I imagined. So much worse, for a while." He raised his gaze back to Dean, and it pierced right into Dean's chest like a blade. "You had it much worse than I did."

You really believe that, don't you? Dean thought. He could barely breathe around it.

"Amara," Dean started, and stopped. He let the timer tick off ten or fifteen seconds. He chose. "She thought she knew me. Understood me. She brought Mom--" His voice faltered. He kept going. "Amara had the power and I. Did not. I was ready to die to keep her from killing the world, but I didn't want to die, you know? And she was in my head because she let herself in, not because I let her in."

He thought about Cas hugging him. Saying, I could go with you.

In the inadequate kitchen light, Cas's eyes shone. The blade sunk in deeper.

"I don't think I had it worse," Dean said. "I just had it different."

Cas made an expression that seemed to say he would accept this falsehood for the sake of manners. Dean wanted to kiss him so badly he shifted backwards in case his treacherous hands went reaching for Cas of their own volition.

"I'm sorry he hurt you," Dean said, and Cas's face was about to crumple, he could tell, and that was the exact second the timer buzzed loudly enough to make them jump like they'd been goosed.

"Fuck." Dean slapped the timer off and grabbed a potholder, the adrenaline snapping through his veins making his hands shake.

The cookie sheet was removed from the oven and placed on the stove top. Dean took a chance on glancing at Cas, whose eyes were wilder than cookies normally required until he took a deep breath.

"They do look like cookies," Cas said with the dry serenity of a desert.

Dean cough-laughed and grabbed a metal spatula from the drawer.

"We're supposed to wait two minutes before removing them," Cas said.

"Okay."

Dean squinted at the cookies. They did appear to be cookies. Round. Lightly browned. Smelled fantastic. All in all you would not mistake them for anything other than cookies.

Two interminable minutes gone by, Dean tried scraping one off the cookie sheet.

"Hmm," he said, as the cookie splintered into chunks.

He went at the next ones more gingerly, until the plates Cas had were full and most of the cookies intact.

"Moment of truth," Dean said, putting one of the broken pieces into his mouth and chewing.

Cas did the same.

They looked at each other.

"Holy shit," Dean.

The sentiment was mirrored on Cas's face. "The molecules are still prominent," he said, "but I like it."

"These're stupid amazing." Dean was already cramming a whole cookie into his gob and attaining transcendence. "Three fucking ingredients."

"They are nice," Cas agreed, chewing another bite with measurably more dignity.

"Goddamn voodoo," Dean said, picking up cookies double-handed, 'cause second-degree burns? Worth the risk.

All but ten of the cookies were gone in a matter of minutes. Dean inwardly congratulated himself for buying extra milk at the grocery earlier.

He felt giddy with cookie triumph, or possibly just sugar. Cas was watching him with a smile almost right there, threatening to break out at any time, and now Dean was bumping his arm against his. He wanted to see that smile at full wattage. The cookies were Cas's idea, Cas deserved the glory here. Best batch of cookies Dean'd ever had a hand in.

He could kiss the taste of them off of Cas's mouth--

"You make cookies?" Sam said, strolling into the kitchen like he lived here or something.

Cas moved away to find Sam a plate.

Dean thought about the jury trial that would have a prosecutor proclaiming things like, ...And he killed his brother with a metal spatula a mere two days before a national holiday. Your honor, we seek the death penalty.

Before he shut himself resolutely alone into his own bedroom, Dean did knock on Sam's door.

"You're doing okay with everything, right?"

Sam squinted at him and toed off his sneakers. "Relative to what?"

"Been a stressful few -- several -- months. Possibly years, even."

"Possibly." Sam let his eyebrows rise and fall. "I'm okay, Dean."

"You wouldn't tell me if you weren't, would you."

"Probably not." Sam paused. "We gotta stop Lucifer, but. What else is new."

He didn't sound dangerously hollowed out about it, so Dean let it go for the time being.

"Okay!" He clapped his hands together. "Good chat."

Sam laughed silently. "You invited Mom to dinner Sunday?"

That brought Dean up short. He looked at Sam for a beat, past the white noise. "I will."

It was a simple text, after another hour of deliberation.

"Having ham n stuff Sunday around 6. We'd love it if you'd join," he wrote.

"Thanks. Love you," Mary wrote.

It wasn't exactly an affirmative RSVP, but he hadn't expected one.

24 December

Someone was throwing a concert in the largest bathroom at seven a.m.

The song, amplified by the tiles and concrete, coagulated as Dean entered.

Cas was scrubbing one of the stalls with a sponge and chemicals strong enough to singe nostril hair. On the floor, the clunky jambox Dean had bought for three bucks at a junk shop issued forth the impeccable Mr. Plant and his beseeching vibes.

As you would for me, oh, I would share your load -- let me share your load.

"Hello, Dean," Cas said over Page's guitar. "I won't be but another half hour or so." He rinsed the sponge in a bucket.

"You're listening to the mixtape," Dean said, startled and grinning, and possibly not awake enough for prudent self-censoring.

"Of course," Cas said, as though it was patently obvious he would. He had a fond look on his face. "I like this song in particular very much."

Dean was suddenly far too awake, far too underdressed, far too…far too… Ol' Robbie just kept singing, "Baby, let me," and oh hell what was Dean supposed to say to that. He'd given Cas the tape weeks before, having made it one night with the help of what, in retrospect, was liquor-fueled bravery.

It was hours too early to start drinking again.

"Um. Yeah. Yes. I like this song as well." Dean fidgeted. "Obviously."

Cas, preoccupied with disinfectants, was not noticing this display of barely concealed panic, thank god for minor mercies. "The lyrics have a lovely message."

"Yes," Dean said faintly. "Oh."

Cas looked over.

"No," Dean said, "it's only I-- It took a while for this song to grow on me when I was younger. It felt too much like prog to me."

"Is prog anything like a trog?" Cas asked. He stepped out of the stall with a small smile.

"No." Dean shook his head, smiling a little defeat. "It means-- You know, it isn't important."

Whatever track his train was on had derailed at the sight of Cas's forearms, uncovered by the rolled up sleeves of an old plaid flannel that may have been Sam's.

Cas did notice this lapse in conversation. "There's fresh coffee in the kitchen," he said, like caffeine withdrawal might explain Dean and his jitteriness.

Coffee did sound great, though. Maybe it would still be scalding hot and Dean could pore it directly onto his face.

"Thanks for cleaning in here," he said, moving toward the hallway.

After he'd downed a cup of coffee so quickly his tongue was numb, he tried to put himself in some sorta order, mentally.

Cas was supposed to listen to the mixtape; that was the whole reason Dean had made it for him.

Cas lived in the bunker, as far as Dean was concerned. It only stood to reason Cas would be responsible for some of the chores.

Cas had arms. Arms were not invisible.

Unfortunately, all of these thoughts in procession had the cumulative effect of making Dean feel even less sane.

Another pot of coffee would cure him. He was sure of it.

He'd heard once that shopping on Christmas Eve wasn't too bad since by December 24th a lot of folks had given up and/or were tapped out, finances wise. Dean was not benefitting from any widespread collective surrender, but he did find his mom a beautiful winter scarf in shades of gray and pale green. He bought Sam some of those overpriced multivitamins he liked, and, for want of figuring out anything else to buy Cas, another blue hoodie, this one paler with a zipper.

He didn't know what it was about this time of year, or this specific year -- the persistent gloom, the hooky-spook feeling of everyone in the country being out of the office, emotionally or otherwise, the long-delayed whiplash of being batted around by the creator of the universe and His questionable-to-horrific kin, the revelation that England had a Men of Letters chapter and they were such a bag of dicks they made angels look civilized (no offense, Cas), etc., etc. Traffic jams. In Lebanon, even. The town's population measured in the dozens, but okay.

Dean turned off the Impala and sat there in silence for a few measured breaths. He imagined Cas into the backseat and his face went warm.

So much for that, he thought, shaking off the daydream.

The bunker was suspiciously empty at six o'clock and smelled like someone had been cooking, despite a lack of foodstuffs sitting around. Dean was about to start calling names and kicking butt, and then saw something twinkling in the library.

The tabletop tree had been bedazzled with a single string of teensy white lights. A piece of folded paper was tucked beneath the tree base.

Behind the bunker, on the knoll

Cas's handwriting.

He left his bags in his room and put his coat back on. Outside, he trudged up the hill in powdery snow that had begun to accumulate on the grass. In the strange bright darkness, he could just see Cas sitting on an old log, his face tipped up to the sky.

Dean watched his profile for a minute, from a safe distance. He let the ache roll over him until he knew he could withstand its weight.

He kept climbing.

Cas had probably heard him huffing up the last few steps, where the embankment seemed slipperier. He'd buttoned up his trench like he was capable of getting cold -- although, maybe he was? He looked cold and elated to see Dean, and the combination made Dean's longing heavier for a moment.

"Good thing I wore my lumberjack boots," Dean said, because why waste an opportunity to be an asshole.

Cas stood up, expression changed on a dime. "Good thing there's no-one around to be offended by my stiff wardrobe." That one cocked eyebrow was less polite.

Touché.

A big brown cardboard box sat at Cas's feet.

Dean looked at it pointedly.

Cas sighed. "I didn't know what to give you." He held up his hands. "I know you said what you said. I wanted to get you something."

"Pretty big box, Cas," Dean said, putting on a smarmy voice. "Settin' the bar real high here, man."

"You may want to reserve judgment on that." Cas rubbed his hands together, less from glee and more, perhaps, from chill. He picked up the box with zero effort, as always.

Dean took the box from him tentatively, until he realized it was extremely lightweight. He sat it on the log and opened up the untaped flaps.

"You bought me…popcorn?" Dean asked, staring down at what was a whole jar's worth of kernels popped into fluffy abundance.

Cas plucked at a piece and a long, long, long rope of popcorn rose from the box. "I saw somewhere that some people have a tradition of making popcorn garlands for the wildlife at the holidays. I thought we could put it on this fir that's up here."

The wind was sure cutting into Dean's eyes, wasn't it? Making them burn.

He wanted to laugh, or scoff, and found he couldn't, he just couldn't. He was going to have to walk back down the hill with Cas in a while and pretend like this wasn't the most romantic Hallmark movie shit ever, like it wasn't crushing him that Cas didn't mean it that way, 'cause why would he.

Dean helped Cas take the popcorn chain all the way out of the box and they walked in general synchrony to the fir. Their hands lifted the garland up and around the not too tall tree; when they were finished they stood back and admired the effort.

It looked like a proper Christmas tree in a storybook, like twee squirrels and precocious deer would arrive soon. It was the prettiest Christmas tree Dean had ever decorated.

"Thanks, Cas," he said, meaning it more than usual.

"You're welcome." And if Cas's voice sounded kind, well.

That's who a real friend was, wasn't it? A kindness.

Bird feeding, homemade gift giving, dashing Disney prince amounts of kindness.

In his bedroom, Dean stood around opening and closing his hands, trying to put their circulation back in order. Trying to clear his head, lift away the twinges in the crooks of his arms, the back of his neck. He needed to wrap his measly offerings. He needed to plan tomorrow's cooking schedule, get some sleep already. No use waiting around as though sleigh bells were gonna ring out.

Cas would know where the wrapping paper was being stored. Dean knocked on his bedroom door twice.

"You decent?" he asked, opening the door after there wasn't an answer.

Sitting on the edge of the bed, Cas wiped his eyes and looked over. "Of course."

The tears thick in his voice were so disconcerting, so unexpected and rending, Dean was perched beside him in an instant without as much as another conscious thought to justify his actions.

"Cas?" he asked softly.

Cas closed his eyes. Another tear or two dripped onto his hands folded in his lap. "I've been thinking," he said.

And as soon as he said it--

"No," Dean whispered.

There was no snow here, no froth or fog or checking out. Cas's intentions were as clear and sharp in Dean's brain as an icepick.

"I should leave Monday," Cas said, watching the flame of a jar candle on the chest of drawers flicker. "I'm of more use to you, to all of you, if I'm actively searching for Lucifer, which I should have been doing all along."

"No," Dean said, for once in his life not in anger but in utter dismay. "You don't have to earn your keep, for pity's sake."

Maybe Dean was reentering puberty and that's why his voice was so perpetually fucked up anymore.

Cas wouldn't look at him, something ashamed and mournful in his eyes.

Something lonely.

A calm, terrible sorrow poured into Dean's throat.

"I don't want you to go," he said, enunciating every word, not fumbling as he dipped his head into Cas's space to make him look at him. "Cas. We need you-- I need you to stay. Not because you are capable of smiting a demon or tolerating Crowley. Not because your dumb fuck of a brother is plotting whatever he's plotting and your dad left, again." Dean took a breath. It made his voice shakier. "I want you here because I want you here. You have any idea how much I missed you when--"

The when being any of a number of times Cas had been in heaven, captured, hunted, imprisoned, possessed, tortured or outright dead, or assumed to be such, and Dean--

Whatever Dean felt had been like its own animal stalking a cage; a clawed-open wound that only ever began to heal when Cas was home. How Amara might have empathized, if she'd understood human empathy. Dean had been able to keep his own feelings locked away for years.

And now… Not so much.

Despair was creeping in at the periphery; he only had a little courage left.

Cas didn't look away.

Dean's throat closed.

I could be your home, if you wanted, he thought, without hope.

The lock clicked back into place.

He looked down, swallowed. Okay. Okay. Cas would be leaving. He'd survived before.

They both had, Dean supposed.

"Dean," Cas whispered, and his fingers gently pried open one of Dean's clenched hands, until he could press their palms together. He was leaning closer, his eyes full of candlelight and wonder.

Dean had missed something.

"I heard you," Cas said, his forehead touching Dean's, "when you prayed to me, a moment ago."

The lock began to crumble. Dean lifted his other hand carefully.

"Please, please stay," he whispered, brushing his thumb across the top of Cas's cheek.

Cas leaned into his hand. He nodded. Dean ducked his head again, and Cas met him for the softest, warmest kiss Dean had ever felt.

They pulled back. It could have been left there, maybe. A modest kiss. A friendly, fleeting moment.

For as many as two more unsteady breaths they stared at each other. Dean felt his stomach lift as Cas's pupils dilated.

There was nothing chaste about what Dean wanted, or what he saw in Cas's eyes.

When he and Cas crashed back together, somebody made a helpless, relieved sound. Each of them had the other's head cradled in his hands.

Neither of them left the bed for hours, and neither of them slept.

25 December

"Deck the Halls" issuing forth from the floor did rouse Dean from an ultra relaxed haze. He groaned and reached down over the edge of the mattress. His fingertips met cloth and boot treads and he scrabbled around attempting to locate the errant phone that was mixed up in the heap. The phone kicked into high gear with a shriller version of the song, prompting Cas to snap his fingers.

The music stopped.

"Nnnn," Cas said into Dean's shoulder blade.

The heat of his exhalation trembled against Dean's skin. "Was that an alarm, or did you change your ringtone?" He shifted back into Cas's hold.

Cas tightened the arm around Dean's waist. "It's eight a.m."

"Ah."

Dean drifted and basked. Cas opened his hand and began to slide it lower. Dean was extremely, if sleepily, into this next gambit. And then he remembered what day it was.

He caught himself before he actually fell out of bed.

Standing up was successful, in that he didn't fall down then either.

"You have to start cooking already?" Cas blinked at Dean like Dean was endearing and inexplicable.

The floor was numbing Dean's feet as he tried to distinguish his clothes from Cas's. "Soon. Coffee first."

"Naturally." Cas sat up and stretched and yawned and scratched through his messy hair that made him look like he had when they'd first met, which in turn made Dean's heart cramp with adoration. "I can make that."

A pot of coffee guzzled, they dragged each other into the bathroom, propped a chair against the doorknob, and cleaned up, round-aboutly. Getting dressed in clothes that hadn't been on the floor was also somewhat less efficient than it might have been under other circumstances. The caffeine was meeting serious resistance; Dean almost fell asleep halfway through putting on a sock, since he was lying down, curled against Cas.

Cas stroked his fingers through Dean's hair over and over. Already addicted, Dean raised his head to kiss him, and it was more effective than another pot of coffee would've been.

Around ten o'clock, a crust was being blind-baked and Dean was wiping down the counters for the next phase. A kettle of apple cider and cinnamon simmered on the stove. Cas was up to his elbows in potatoes at the sink. He'd queued up a Christmas playlist on Dean's laptop and Loretta Lynn was singing to heck with ol' Santa Claus.

Dean had rarely been happier in his life.

"We're still friends," he said with some amazement.

Cas plopped the pan of potatoes down on the counter. "Was there some question about this?"

Dean blushed, feeling lovesick and disastrous. "No. It's only... I am really great at ruining things." He flubbed around for the peeler and managed to feel even stupider.

"Dean." Cas put a hand on Dean's wrist delicately. "I'm never not going to be your friend."

Sensing perhaps that Dean was one million percent incapable of responding to that without crying, he leaned up and kissed Dean's temple.

Dean hugged him.

Cas hugged him back. "I'm not peeling the potatoes, Dean."

Jesus. That crafty look in his eyes was going to be Dean's kryptonite.

"Chop pecans for me instead?" Dean asked, taking advantage of Cas's inability to stop looking at his mouth.

Cas kissed him and slid a knife out of the closest drawer simultaneously. Dean tried not to perish from lust.

At some point it crossed his mind that Sam was taking advantage of a holiday to sleep late. He bounced down the hall to give him grief, as was his right as the older brother.

Sam's bedroom was empty. Instinct told Dean that Sam's bedroom had, in fact, been empty since sometime yesterday morning.

The bunker's main door clunked open and Dean raced toward the map room yelling "Sammy!" with enough panic in his voice that Cas was right on his heels. They mostly crashed into the room together.

"The fuck, man," Dean panted as Sam clipped down the stairs.

"Mary," Cas said, looking up at the balcony.

Sam gave Dean a half apologetic, half brat grin and hoisted a giant duffle bag into Dean's hands. "Merry Christmas."

"Hey, Dean," their mom said as she descended, smiling more regretfully. "Hope it's not too late to say yes to dinner."

"No, of course not," Dean said, thrusting the bag back at Sam, who had reached for the other bags Mary had and was therefore lousy with bags.

"Here," Cas said, more helpful than a concierge. "Hi, Sam."

The two of them hauled away the bag assortment, leaving Dean and his mother unencumbered.

She hugged him at the foot of the stairs. "You doing all right?" she asked. She smelled like vanilla and frost.

"Yeah, Mom." He let go with immense reluctance. "Real well."

She put a hand on his jaw and studied him. He tried not to squirm, wondering what she saw in his expression.

"Good," she said, eyes shining. "I hear you've got quite a menu planned. Need any help in the kitchen? Or company, at least?"

"The latter for sure."

He took a deep breath. She hooked her arm around his and they went to join Sam and Cas.

"Dude, no way," Sam said before he'd even torn all the paper off the book. He'd lit up like a bottle rocket as soon as he recognized the bottom half of the cover illustration.

"'The Herdmans were absolutely the worst kids in the history of the world,'" Dean recited, and Sam joined him in unison: "'They lied and stole and smoked cigars -- even the girls -- and talked dirty and hit little kids and cussed their teachers and took the name of the Lord in vain and set fire to Fred Shoemaker's old broken-down toolhouse.'"

Sam cackled like a witch. "Thanks, seriously. A classic."

Their mom and Cas shared a look of pure confusion.

"It was my favorite book for, I dunno, two or three years in a row," Sam explained.

"Try five or six years, minimum." Dean tossed a sticky red bow him. "I read that book to you I could not even count how many times. Hundreds."

"Maybe ten."

"Fifty-seven times if it was once," Dean insisted.

"I said thank you," Sam said loudly.

Cas hid a laugh. Dean knocked his knee against his in solidarity.

During the bestowing of marshmallows atop sweet potatoes, while their mother and Cas chatted and set one of the library tables for dinner, Sam said, "So."

Dean stirred the pan of green beans. "Yeah?"

Sam placed the final marshmallow and admired his handiwork. "You and Cas, huh." He waited, gave up, and opened the oven to slide the dish of casserole inside. He closed up the oven and crossed his arms over his chest.

"Yes," Dean said, content to leave the topic there.

He glanced at Sam. Sam flicked him on the head, and Dean swatted his hand away.

"No fighting near a major heat source," Mary said, returning to the kitchen and exiting just as quickly with a tray of veggies and dip and a stack of napkins.

"'Bout time, is all," Sam told Dean, following her out.

Well. He wasn't wrong.

"They remade Shop Around the Corner into You've Got Mail," Sam was telling Mary, "which was about people emailing each other. I think." He shrugged. "Email was still basically a novelty in the '90s."

"I think it's novel now," Mary said. "Type a letter, a million words, I guess, hit send, it goes around the world before I can even open the next one from Bath & Body Works." She shook her head. "They send me about nine emails a day, and they sell so many types of soap. Who is using this much soap?"

Dean blinked. "I mean. We do go through a fair amount more than most folks."

Mary threw a wadded up napkin at him. "Yes, all right. But normal people, I'm saying."

Sam changed the subject back to holiday movies. "There've been a bunch more adaptations of A Christmas Carol, including one with the Muppets."

"What?" Mary's eyes bulged.

Dean's attention was drawn to Cas coming back into the room with the gift Sam had given him, a leather pocket journal with a removable notebook inside.

Cas sat in the chair beside Dean and started filing out the notebook's first page.

"Emergency contacts," he said.

"You're such a Boy Scout." Dean set his foot against Cas's under the table.

"You have a higher than average number of phone numbers." Cas hooked his ankle around Dean's. "And I'm already on my twelfth phone in eight years."

Dean resisted the urge to put his chin over Cas's shoulder, but he did poke at a corner of something sticking out of the journal until he could slide it out.

The badly ragged photo turned out to be of himself from over a year ago, taken at a dive in Tennessee that Dean vaguely recalled as being named something like Rubbin' Butts BBQ. He looked delighted; there was a pile of trashed ribs on the bar in front of him. Sam's elbow was also in the picture, to the side.

Cas cleared his throat and kept making notes.

Dean couldn't kiss him here. Or, technically, he could, but it seemed like the kinda thing that would bring the other discussion to a screeching halt.

The ache he'd felt over the last few days -- months, years -- when thinking about Cas hadn't dissipated as much as evolved, in the scant, if intensely pleasurable, hours since late last night. It occurred to him that just because he could have what he wanted, didn't mean he wouldn't want it.

Like, at all. And what he wanted, he wanted very, very badly.

Cas gave him a steady look.

They were definitely gonna have to figure out this thing where Dean started praying without realizing that's what he was doing.

"I like the version with Patrick Stewart in it," Dean blurted overtop whatever Sam was saying about Albert Finney.

He was the only one who heard Cas snort. He kept his foot right where it was.

"These antlers were made for a child," Dean grumbled.

"Then take them off," Sam said, unimpressed.

"I didn't say I was gonna do that." Dean added another glug of brandy to the mulled cider and stirred. "But you have to put the Santa hat back on."

"Fine." Sam ladled punch into four cups. "Are we watching a movie or no?"

In the other room, their mom laughed a hearty belly laugh.

Sam shot Dean an amused look. "I think she's telling Cas about that time you peed in the bathtub."

"I was two," Dean protested. "It's not like I still pee in the tub."

"You better not," Sam muttered, taking two cups as he wandered out.

Dean turned off the stove and was about to bring the other two cups to the library when Cas strolled in with an armload of dirty dishes. He was already wearing the sweater Mary had given him, more to prove it fit than because the bunker was chilly. Winchester genetics, or maybe sheer common sense, meant Cas's casual wardrobe was quickly becoming a trove of blue tops.

Cas left the plates on the counter. Dean kissed his cheek; Cas went very still, and his eyes went very black.

The kiss Cas returned to him was the sweetest, filthiest thing that had ever happened to Dean in any kitchen, which felt like a challenge for future encounters.

…When no-one else was essentially a room away.

"Are we going to watch a Christmas film?" Cas asked, as though the spot behind Dean's ear would reveal this most hallowed secret.

Dean never really answered. They did wander back into the library eventually, one after the other, Cas carrying the kettle for the refills bound to be necessary. Neither Mary nor Sam seemed annoyed by their temporary absence and thrilled to be offered more cider.

Dean ate another slice of pie, in case the pie felt neglected.

None of them had the energy to stay up and visit much past ten p.m. The dishes were declared the morning's business. Dean left Baby's new five-quart bottle of motor oil on the library table and his own new sweater folded neatly beside it. Goodnights were exchanged in the hallway. Mary headed to her old room and Sam to his. Dean saw Cas touching one of the feathery white Christmas tree limbs with a smile before he clicked off the lights.

Dean offered his hand and Cas took it, let Dean lead him away.

Cas just held him for a long time, the two of them slumped against the door inside Dean's room, where it was quiet and safe.

Both the room, and the circle of Cas's embrace.

"Wanna hold you too," Dean murmured.

The tenderness in Cas's face was almost too much to endure. Dean still found himself starving for it, greedy to be gentle with Cas in return, to make him shiver and gasp.

Later, Cas traced a triangle with his fingertips on Dean's bare hipbone.

Dean kissed the notch of Cas's throat, his clavicle, his palm, caught as Cas raised his hand to bring Dean back to his mouth.

Together, they learned how best to pray, no other soul or spirit privy to a single syllable of their confessions.

26 December

"Dean," Cas said.

"Mmmm." Dean made himself as immovable as possible. "What time is it?"

"Almost ten." Cas stroked Dean's back with his huge, warm, perfect hands. "If you let me get up, I can make coffee."

As though he couldn't pick Dean up one-handed.

"Mmmmmmmm," Dean said, without doing anything else like opening his eyes or rolling away.

After a minute, he said, "So. Anything about the holiday you'd care to make a tradition?"

Cas didn't respond.

Dean lifted his head from Cas's chest and smiled at the sight of him.

My dear home, he thought.

"Any of it," Cas whispered, eyes soft. "All of it."

"Done," Dean said, and kissed him good morning.

#deancas #destiel #spn #fic #holiday fluff

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thetruthbetween · 2 years

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I wrote this in a SPN omegaverse discord and was gonna save it for next Monday, but my patience is approximately 0% so... have a Momfucker Monday post 12 hours late!

(Sam/Mary, omegaverse, lactation kink)

Yesterday was the first of the newly christened "momfucker monday" so Sam/Mary is on my mind. And apparently Sam/Mary lactation kink is really common. And I just had the thought of like… omegaverse where once an omega has a pup, they just… Never Stop Lactating. Like even if they don't nurse or express, they just stay full. It doesn't cause any pain or problems like IRL, but if they nurse or express they'll continue lactating, no matter how long it's been.

So Mary coming back to life and being Super Attracted to Sam but like, freaked out about it cuz that's her baby and now he's a giant alpha, and leaving cuz she's afraid if she stays she'll be a bad mom and cliche omega and jump her son. And blah blah, BMOL and AU happens and she's finally back at the bunker with them again (albeit with a bunch of other people, too) and Sam makes a move. Like maybe in that ep where Mary's talking to him about her Thing with Bobby and Sam's just kinda like "you deserve someone who'll open up to you" and like, maybe runs his hand down her back and smiles all soft and warm and she's just like, "404 brain not found switching to omega.exe" (yeah, I'm mixing up the computer terms, shh)

But then, y'know, Bobby gets injured and Mary goes with him to the cabin to recover (and also a last ditch attempt at a socially-acceptable relationship) but you know how that goes and instead of staying at the cabin after Bobby leaves, she goes back to the bunker, and oop, there's Sam. Sam, the alpha, who smells so good and looks at her with so much love and the bunker isn't full of other people anymore, just Mary and Sam and Dean and sometimes Cas again, and Dean, he's got a habit of bookin' it when Sam starts looking at her Like That, and Mary's not sure if he knows or just picks up on the pheromones, but he leaves them alone every time.

And finally one day they're IDK, in the library or something going over some lore and Sam's sitting at the table and Mary comes up and leans against the edge to talk to him and Sam stands up and he's so tall and big and he steps right up to her and puts one hand on her hip and she can smell that hint of alpha arousal coming from him that's gotten so commonplace when they're together, but this time it's not just a hint, he doesn't try to hold it back. He crowds close to her, his other hand at her jaw, tilting her head. Dips his head down to run his nose along her neck, scenting her. His scent grows even stronger and Mary realizes, oh, this is happening now. It's actually happening, it's not just something they dance around and refuse to acknowledge.

And Mary, she uses heat suppressors but maybe she forgot a dose or two, and maybe her scent is getting a little thicker, a little warmer, and maybe that's what pushed Sam into action finally. It wasn't on purpose, she honestly forgot, got busy. But now she's got an alpha she loves pressed against her, scenting her, and she's right on the edge of tipping into heat. Close enough that he can smell it on her, but not so close that she can't stop it if she walks away now and takes her suppressor.

But she doesn't. She tugs on Sam's hair so he lifts his head, and she looks into his eyes and she sees the love and desire there. And she chooses him. Tilts her head to bare herself to him, whispers, "Alpha" and arches into him.

When Sam carries her to his room, they pass Dean, barely hearing him say something about heading out to find a hunt right now, might not be back for a few days, bye.

And it's amazing. Not only is it Mary's first heat since the one that got her pregnant with Sam in the first place, not only is she with a strong alpha who uses his body like a shield against the world, locking them together in their own little bubble, but it's an alpha that's also her baby. Her baby she didn't get to see grow up, her baby she still remembers nursing at her breast. Her baby she still carries milk for.

And Sam, who doesn't remember having a mother, doesn't remember ever nursing from her (Dean remembers, it's not uncommon for omegas to nurse their pups to school age, Dean remembers the taste of sweet milk, the comfort of soft breasts, but Sam doesn't have that), he dips his head once his knot is secure inside her, and he tastes the milk she has for him. His was the last mouth to taste her milk before she died and the first after she came back, and will be the only until the pup he gives her has their turn.

#supernatural #mary winchester #sam winchester #sammary #momfucker monday #(a day late oops)#otp: just having you here fills in the biggest blank #omegaverse #Nic speaks

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gonna-need-you-to-not · 1 year

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Supernatural Season 12 rewatch thoughts...

Okay so we all know that my main problem is that I just can't get past everyone's terrible English accent but we'll put that aside for now

I enjoyed Rick Springfield, though I know many didn't

They shouldn't have put in that weird dub of Cas saying hey assbut again though

Sorry to be a bitch but The One You've Been Waiting For was ruined by Gil Darnell. I've never seen him in anything else so he might be good elsewhere but he really wasn't in this. The ep was far-fetched just like all the Thule stuff but they could've got away with it if he'd delivered a different performance imho

Alicia Witt killed it in Lily Sunder, so did Ian Tracey

I liked the secret service terrorism investigation guys

I don't buy Billie being so immediately happy about taking Mary. She made it clear she wanted Dean or Sam, I feel like she could've at least thought about it for a second or two before agreeing

Regarding Dean is such a good ep, and JA was just wonderful in it, but why did we need Dean fooling around with a woman who looked 22 max

Something about Stuck in the Middle falls flat with me and I don't know what it is, though I do appreciate Speight's commitment to going off-piste, and all his shenanigans in the editing suite

Why did David Hadyn Jones have so much foundation on

Absolutely thrilled to see Eileen again and I love how happy she made my best friend Sam

I know I wasn't going to mention it, but just real quick - NO ONE IN ENGLAND TALKS LIKE THAT I PROMISE YOU EVEN THE REALLY POSH ONES okay thanks

This whole BMOL murdery boarding school thing wound me up like wtf and also having Hess say things like 'mangy colonials' honestly why do you hate English people when Mark Sheppard has been so good to you

Nothing against the guy but I just don't like DHJ as Ketch and I really did try. They set the character up to be so scary and cold and then they let this man caricature-James-Bond his way through the season and it's frustrating

Speaking of caricatures, we really really really don't need to put a cup of tea in the hand of every English character. Please fuck off with that (picks up tea)

The sheriff with his taxidermy squirrel did NOT get enough love, what an icon

The waitress Dean slept with looks like Alona Tal and I'd like to know if that was intentional, and also please look at this for some top drawer analysis on that whole mess

I know the Destiel community love the whole mixtape thing but to this day I have no idea what the point of that moment was. Cas could've gone into Dean's room to talk, or just waited til he wasn't in there to look for the Colt, I just don't get why the zep cassette

Cas really was a hot mess in this season, he was all over the shop

Explain to me again how Ketch is able to control a Hell Hound??????

The back and forth between Lucifer and Crowley got a bit tiresome but I think both Marks did the best they could with slightly worn material

Still livid that they killed Eileen

The writers really did JP dirty by giving him a half-baked Braveheart speech and then having JA steal the frickin episode with his "I hate you and I love you" emotional monologue to Mary

I do enjoy the way Mark Pellegrino says Castiel (Cast-chell). Lucifer will pronounce your name however he likes

In conclusion I watched this season again to check if I'd misjudged it the first time round, but turns out I do in fact mostly hate it

#supernatural #jensen ackles #dean winchester #misha collins #spn #castiel #jared padalecki #sam winchester #supernatural season 12

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lyssak09 · 2 years

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Dean Winchester hc

Reader is female. I'll get better at writing reader as gender neutral. I promise!

75% scarry boi and 25% cinnamon roll

Definitely has at least slight anger issues and delusional

You might have been another hunter or someone he met in a bar. Either way, it doesn't matter

When he first laid eyes on you, you looked like an angel. Just absolutely stunning.

When he first started talking to you you just thought he was cocky

While he thought you were just amazing. Like he can't find the proper words to describe you. You are just perfect

So he goes up to you and starts flirting.

You might play along or just very politely decline his advances

Either way, he wears you down and gets you to go out with him

After you start to get to know him you see he is a very sweet person. And eventually you'll start dating

In the beginning phase of your relationship it was perfect. For the most part

Dean was a bit clingy but nothing bad. Just a few puppy eyes here and there whenever you try to leave without him

But as time goes on he becomes worse. More clingy, pushy, demanding, and possessive

Dean will force/manipulate you to move in with him and tries to cut off any contact someone has with you.

He will barely let you around Sam and Cas. Everytime you're around them Dean will have a tight hand around your own hand or waist, pulling you close to him

If you do somehow manage to go out by yourself Dean will find out (he may or may not put a track on your phone and in you) and go after you. He might force you home or if you've been good he'll let you think you're alone but will just stalk you.

Dean will start to demand you to do little things. Such as kissing him when he demands asks or making you cuddle with him and not letting you up

If the rest of Team Free Will ask about you and if they can hangout with you Dean will 100% become either defensive, dodge the question, or just make up excuses

Eventually you'll get tired of his ways and try to leave

"DEAN!" Y/N yelled. "CALM DOWN! I was just hanging out with my friends!" she said in fear. I continued to throw my fit and destroy part of the bunker. "THEY'RE TRYING TO TAKE YOU FROM ME. WHY ARE YOU FRIENDS WITH ALL THEM?!" I yelled and chucked a lamp across the room. Y/N flinched and got angry. "Because they are my best friends! I've known them longer than you! I love them, you jerk!" She yelled. "THEY'RE NOT WORTH YOUR TIME. ONLY I AM." I yell and walk towards her. "I'm done Dean. You've made me lose half of my friends, made me move in with you even though I wasn't ready, and so much more. We're over Dean." I hear her say. As she gets ready to leave it hits me that she's leaving me. "DON'T YOU DARE WALK OUT THAT DOOR Y/N. I LOVE YOU. YOU'RE MINE" I yell as I grab her wrist. "I belong to no one. Especially you." "Baby, you aren't allowed to leave me ever. You're mine." I say to and tighten my grasp on her wrist. Y/N scoffs and yanks her wrist back and walks out the door. "Son of a bitch!" I yell. She's mine. I love her and she loves me. I threw a chair in anger. Who does she think she is?! She belongs to me!

Dean will wait for a few days. I mean you love him, so you'll come back to him, right? He'll call you everyday and stalk watch you from a far

He'll get tired of waiting and stright up kidnap you. Once he has you back home you're screwed.

You will be chained up. And if you want out to use the restroom or give your wrists and or ankles a break you will have to give Dean something back in return

"You wanna shower? Cuddle with me then"

He loves an contact you give him. He won't admit it but he is touchstarved. So if you wanna manipulate him then let him cuddle you, play with his hair, ect.

If you talk back or just misbehave then he will be pissed. Dean will throw things, yell, and will be very forceful. If you don't apologize for whatever then he will grab you by the throat and force you too.

After an argument or a rough day between the two of you, Dean will grab you and make you sit on his lap and try to get you to laugh. He thinks your laugh is the most mesmerizing thing. Its music to him.

Dean's main goal is to get you to depend on him/ love him and as a bonus, maybe start a family.

Dean wants to spoil you and just do couple things together. But that is all based on your behavior. If you're bad then you're getting punished

He will also use your loved ones against you. Even Castiel or Sam. And Dean is terrifying and serious about his threats. So don't test him

Dean is delusional. So he doesn't think what he is doing is wrong. You're his future wife so there is nothing wrong with kidnapping taking you home and training preparing you for your life together.

Now we all know Dean is a quite a drinker. So when he gets drunk he does get more irritable so take caution. When he is drinking he knows what he's doing is wrong, but he doesn't care.

Dean loves you more than life itself. If you escape he will tear the world apart in search of you.

Remember that he loves you. More than you know

#yandere x reader #yandere x you #yandere headcanon #yandere male #yandere #yandere dean winchester x reader #yandere dean winchester #dean winchester x reader #dean winchester #yandere supernatural #supernatural #Lyssa's hcs #Miss Blue writing

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lost-between-letters · 2 years

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Quality Time

Pairing: Jack Kline X Winchester!Reader (she/her)

Requested by: anon

Word Count: 2,002

Warnings: none

Summary: Dean and Sam were out on a hunt. What did that mean? Quality time with Jack! Aka a fluffy spa day

A/N: can be read both platonic and romantic. Also fun fact, it's currently half past three AM over here and I'm posting this due to a dopamine rush from writing some original stuff (as in my own characters within my own little world)

Today was one of those lovely slow days. The bunker was blissfully quiet, for once there was no music blaring from Dean's room or Sam persuading her to go out and talk to some kids in the village. Cas had taken off for a top secret meeting (that Y/N was pretty sure just meant that he was going out on a date with Dean once him and Sam were done helping Donna out with the vampires) and Jack was in his room, probably catching up on Lord Of The Rings.

Y/N was bored out of her mind.

And what did she do in those instants? Annoy other people to death.

Namely, Jack. Her brothers were not there and for what she had in mind, Dean would run like the devil himself was on his tail and Sam wouldn't make it fun. So Jack it was.

She picked up her phone to shoot him a quick warning text (he could be naked after all - last time Y/N barged in on Dean it hadn't been pretty).

Luckily, Jack was delighted at the idea of some company and said he was okay with her little plan. A spa day!

Damn, Y/N was never more happy about the fact that he hadn't inherited any toxic masculinity from her fake dudebro older brother. So off to the bathroom it was to gather her favourite supplies and change into her fuzziest pair of socks and the biggest hoodie she could find.

Okay, and a little stop at the kitchen as well. There was no such thing as snacks not desired.

"Jack, I hope you're wearing your comfiest clothes right now!" Y/N knocked on his door (or slammed her elbow against it while the things she were carrying threatened to spill over), "can I come in?"

"Yes!"

It was a little struggle to open the door without her hands but Y/N managed.

And promptly almost fell over her own feet.

Jack shot up from where he had been sitting on his bed, face scrunched up with worry, and reached out to take the blankets from the top of the pile. "Is this everything or should I help you carry more?"

Sweet helpful Jack. How could someone not be at least a little in love with him? Y/N shook her head before the hearts in her eyes were painfully obvious and opted to dump the rest of her things on his bed.

"Nope, that's all," she said cheerily and walked over to switch on some quiet music. Standing still wasn't her strong suit. Which was ironic, considering that she was about to sit tight for a while now. Y/N tilted her head towards Jack, "any wishes music wise?"

"Please just something from this decade," he requested.

Y/N chuckled. Yeah, Dean had ensured that they could recite just about every glorious rock song from the sixties to the nineties perfectly. But new stuff? Unheard of as long as Dean had control of the music playing. Ah, the upsides of being home alone.

So Y/N went into her happy playlist and put it on shuffle. That ought to set the mood for some relaxing.

When she had placed her phone on top of the blue tooth speaker Sam had gifted Jack, she was faced with him looking curiously at the several brightly coloured containers.

He picked one up gingerly, as if he was afraid it might explode or spew poison at him, and held it out to her. "What are we using these for?"

"For a spa day!" Y/N said and clapped once, "first, we'll go and wash our faces and then put on one of those fancy face masks. You're holding a peeling by the way. We can do that too but it feels itchy on your skin."

That made Jack toss it back down. "No thank you. But we can try a face mask? What does it do?"

Since Jack had become a steady part of her life, Y/N tended to forget about how little he actually knew about mundane things. Though she had to give it to him, chances were high that neither of her brothers would be able explain the intricacies of an extended skin care routine if she put a gun against their heads. Not that this stuff was life threatening.

So Y/N bit back the ugly part of herself that wanted to laugh at his loss of knowledge (and was ashamed of it a great deal), and instead sat down on the ground with crossed legs. From there, she pulled each item from the pile and explained what it was used for or how it should work. On multiple occasions, Y/N opened a lid and let Jack touch the lotion to get a feel for the texture or held it up for him to smell.

Jack soaked up all her careful explanations like a dry sponge and nodded along attentively. He pushed questions of his own in between such as "is that supposed to feel like water? It's so smooth and cold but thicker."

Which either sent Y/N into a fit of giggles or an existential crisis when his remarks got a little too philosophical ("why do you have to use so many products to keep up a natural look as you just described? I thought natural meant that it's the default for the human body and not something that takes hours of preparation." "Society is a bitch like that sometimes." "I do not understand." "Let's have it stay that way.")

An album played through later, they were ready to apply the first face mask.

Y/N put it on Jack first, using a wide brush to spread it evenly. His lips curled into a smile under the feathery touch. "It tickles."

"Tell me if it starts feeling bad, alright?" She said because she had some nasty experiences with allergic reactions.

Jack merely nodded and closed his eyes. "It's cold. Like if I put my face into water and let it dry. Only that the drying takes longer."

When she was done with him - Jack's skin was now coated in a baby blue layer of cream which made him look younger than his body and mind suggested, and a little ridiculous (but that was the point of this, wasn't it?) - she handed the brush over to him. "Now me."

Jack took it from her hand and carefully dipped it into the container. With the sticky goo applied to it, he let it hover over her face for a moment. "And I just spread it on your skin?"

"Just like I did with you," Y/N said softly and leaned forward to encourage him.

It took another second of nervous hovering before Jack brushed the mask on. He was slow with it, his brows pulled together in concentration as his eyes followed the line of the brush carefully.

It tickled. Y/N laughed quietly and barely resisted the urge to lean into him even more. "You're doing great."

"It's soothing," Jack said and moved on to her forehead, "the repetition of the movement. Feels a bit like painting but the canvas is on your skin."

"Right." She had never thought of it that way before but it made sense.

Silence fell over them after that while Jack was making sure that every part of her face was meticulously covered with the face mask. Y/N could have stayed there all day and let him draw the brush over her skin.

She opened her eyes once she felt him lean back.

"All done." Jack held out the brush for her to take back and she placed it on the nightstand where a towel was waiting for dirtied hands or tools. "What now?"

"Now we let the masks soak in," Y/N said and scooted up until she was leaning against his bedframe, "and then, we'll paint each other's nails."

Jack nodded and moved up beside her. Their shoulders bumped as he pulled up his knees. "Can I have mine green?"

"Sure thing!"

Twenty minutes flew by without either of them noticing. The only reminder was the timer Y/N had set for them to wash off the face masks and it startled both of them.

Jack came back from the bathroom with a rosy face and a smile on his lips that felt like the first few sunbeams on a good day. Y/N just had to smile back, warmth spreading in her chest.

"Who first?" She held up two tiny bottles of nail polish, one forest green, the other pastel orange.

"Me? I don't know how to do this either."

Y/N shrugged and crossed her legs. "It's okay. Here, give me your hand."

Jack did as she asked, his fingers warm in hers. After a moment of consideration, Y/N pulled his hand down on the side of her knee as a make shift table.

Then, she unscrewed the nail polish and handed the bottle over to Jack. "This will feel a little cold at first. Try not to touch it, the polish needs to dry first."

"Okay." Jack nodded and held the bottle tightly with his free hand.

After another quick glance upwards, Y/N leaned over his fingers and started painting carefully. Jack's nails were well kept but short so it was pretty easy to apply the polish, even when she hadn't been the best at keeping her hand steady.

Jack was humming along to the song in the background while Y/N moved from one finger to the next.

When she was finished, she patted his wrist once. "You like it?"

"Yes, thank you," Jack said after inspecting them with awe. "Can I do yours now or should I wait until it's dry?"

"We can try now." Y/N unscrewed the orange nail polish for him (as that was the part that almost always messed up her own nails) and handed him the brush this time.

Jack took it gingerly and patted his own knee. "Can you put your hand here, please?"

That was it. He was trying to kill her. No one could possibly be so sweet.

And because Y/N was pretty fine with that, she did as Jack had asked.

He picked up her thumb and turned it for better access before applying the polish.

As with the face mask, Jack was careful with every new stroke, making sure not to let a drop get where it wasn't supposed to be. Y/N was positively melting.

Her nails took about double the time than did his but Y/N was fine with it. Especially when Jack looked up with a proud smile, and leaned back to crack his back from sitting hunched over. "That was fun! The polish has a different feel to it, almost like water when I used too much."

"Yeah, nail polish is tricky," Y/N agreed and held her hands in the air. "They take some time to dry now, let's lay down."

And they did just that. Jack spread out on his back, hands hovering over his face as he inspected them. Y/N wanted to lean over and kiss his cheek.

Instead of that, she only moved herself until she could put her head on Jack's stomach. From there, she could look up and at his nails too. "The colour suits you."

"Thank you. Yours too," he said.

Y/N grinned. "Thanks."

The music played on in the background as they waited for their nails to dry. The steady up and down of his breathing was hypnotising so Y/N started a lazy conversation to keep them awake.

Still, by the time Sam and Dean came back, they were fast asleep, curled in on each other with their hands resting on Jack's stomach, nails up and not touching anything. Sam took pictures while Dean was complaining about his little sister's virtue.

Y/N heard the tail end of it but for once was too sleepy to call him out. It felt far too good to be in Jack's lax embrace, feel his slow heartbeat under hear ear. She was back asleep in seconds.

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#jack kline x reader #jack x reader #jack x you #supernatural fanfiction #spn fanfiction

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waiting-for-cas-to-save-me · 3 years

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Father Hood for an Angel

Idea: Cas feels bad for taking Jimmy from his family and wonders what id be like to raise a child of his own. God may have heard this slightly drunken prayer and now Cas hasn't answered Sam or Dean for a few weeks

Requested: oh hell no inspired by a song through a song I can't remember but I still have the idea

pairings Castiel x baby angel x team free will

THERE WILL BE MORE. ask to be put on the Tag list to know when the next part comes out.

“This is my voicemail. Make your voice... a mail.”

This was the 14th time in one day that Dean Winchester had heard this god-awful thing, not of Castile's voicemail

"Hey Cas I haven't heard from you in a while We might need your help on a hunt or it just seems like something you might want to get on .call me back or just show up seriously dude Where are you"

to say Dean was frustrated with the disappearance of the best friend Was an understatement. Dean had been on edge not knowing what had happened to the angel much less knowing that Jimmy Novak wouldn't have called him. Even if Castiel hadn't left the body. Sam kept telling him his worry was pointless but he didn't believe him. So he had Sam call The Angel's phone and the same thing This is my voicemail make your voice a mail. Hey, he tried praying but even that didn't get Castile's attention it tried violently screaming till his voice was almost raw Still no reply So they're sat around waiting hoping fingers crossed at the angel would answer them Maybe give you able to give his insight on this case.

little do they know that the angel was dealing with his own problems. he currently had a screaming child on his hands . this wasn't your typical scream. This was a high-pitched whining scream That would cause here of a normal mortal to explode. The scream that Castiel could understand.The Scream of an Angel. The Voice of an angel But this was not an ordinary angel. This angel came to be strictly out of a drunken prayer from Castiel the one time he wished God wasn't listening. Even trying to deal with this infant of an angel for a few weeks now I was making no progress. She refused to acknowledge anything he said whether it be in Enochian or English. She didn't trust him as far as she could throw him which with her being in an infant's vessel would be nowhere.

So to an unknowing mortal ear sounds like a lot of high-pitched screaming if you were in the same room Because the infant Was using the only voice they knew how to use Which was the true voice of Angel. Castiel was trying his best to do the same in hopes that something would get through to her that he was to be trusted that she was in his care That their father left her to him.

He felt sorry because he knew the only reason he had to be in the situation was that he had seen a picture of Claire Novak I realized once again that he had stripped Jimmy of his entire family. He knew he had taken Jimmy's chance of being a father away and out of so he went on a drunken Bender of Misery and self-pity and whoa and awkwardly prayed to God Then one day he may be given a chance to in some way make it up to Jimmy. this is God's cruel way of doing it making Castiel deal with a child. Who is also one of his own- What should be one of his brothers or sisters - Is this child to raise. He had heard the voice of his father letting him know that the child would grow to a point of maturity. the child had hit this point when food no longer tasted like food it began to taste like molecules. a point when all things I would define a mortal, Like puberty, the need for food, water or even to go to the bathroom ceased. the need for slumber no longer existed, emotions not as prevalent. The day that she became a full angel Was the day that Castiel was not looking forward to Because he knew then she would have to answer to the full wrath of heaven for any adult action she ever does after that point.

had he told Sam and Dean about the issue no? He Hadn't answered a call because he was too busy having to scream off of an infant and trying to feed this child that he knew nothing of how to raise children. Grace induced naps last for a while but once she was up he made it clear she was unhappy.

He'd lost count on how many hours he spent walking a room with her in hand singing different lullabies or soft rock songs to her trying to get her to calm down It would work for a moment until she get put down and she didn't want to be left alone That was part of her problem was she didn't like to be alone She had that human need for socialness So Castiel was at the verge of wanting to get a freaking pupus for this damn baby.

Cas heard his phone ring yet another time this time he answered it without even checking his 14 voicemails from Dean.

"dude where the hell are you?"Dean voiceful of rage and resentment

"I've been busy Dean," cas said bouncing the child on his hip walking.

"too busy to answer a phone?"

"you wouldn't understand Dean"the small angel pulled on cas's tie and his coat wanting attention so instead of screaming she just cooed at him

"not now sweetheart I'm on the phone," cas said with the phone in between his shoulder and ear repositioning the child

"Who are you talking to Cas?" dean was confused. Did Castiel get a girlfriend and not tell him or Sam?

"My father has given me the biggest responsibility I have ever been given Dean. Raising a young Angel with her Vessel. I have to be a father to my sister. That's why I haven't answered your prayers or calls. Her true voice would defen you right now. That's how she's been getting my attention. If you thought Mine was bad when I Raised you from Hell you don't want to hear her."Castiel made his point to Dean and was trying to think how to keep from 'sounding like an ass' as Dean would put it.

"Cas you could have just told us I have nothing against kids The only thing that worries me is now there's another target on your back and on hers Not to mention your crazy brothers Do they know she exists If not they will soon You have some weird-ass family dynamics cas.

Why don't you just swing by? Let's meet Heavens newest Angel."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~TAGLIST

@french-vanilla-in-the-clouds

@smiling-girl

@gabrielslittleangel

#Father hood for an Angel #dad castiel #castiel x y/n #castiel x you #dadstiel #casgirls #sam and dean #dad dean #dean fluff #dean winchester #sam fanfiction #sam winchester #team free will #tfw

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mishacollinsthighsss · 3 years

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HAPPY BIRTHDAY @melly-the-crazy-coconut ! 🥳💙😁

Yes, yes I know this is late and that you've read it already, but I had to share it online, alright? 😂

Also, it's beta'd now by the amazing @the-rollerchloster (thank you SO much again, you really made some great changes there 💙) so it's definitely much better than before 👀

Pairing: Demon!Dean/Castiel

Words: ~ 4,6k

Explicit

Warning: there's some... let's say, morally-not quite-right content, including no explicit consent (though Cas doesn't mind, it reads like he kinda gets pushed into it at first). Not just for sex, also for other things. It's demon Dean, so there might be some dark stuff that I usually wouldn't put into fics, such as Dean cutting Cas to get his hands on his grace. If you're not comfortable with things like that, please don't read.

"Dean?"

Cas walked around the bunker, looking for the hunter who had somehow managed to flee his warded room. Ever since they'd found him after he’d turned into a demon, he'd been locked up in there, and even though it had pained him to watch Dean like that, right in this moment Cas wished he was in there.

"Dean!" he called out once again, his voice echoing through the empty halls, but there was no answer. At least Sam was on a hunt with Jody, which made Cas sigh in relief. If Dean got out of the bunker though…

"Hard time finding me, angel?" Dean's voice echoed through the halls, and Cas immediately straightened his back, his vision sharpening, but he couldn't see anything.

"This isn't funny, Dean," he answered, while he kept walking, trying to get closer to the other man's voice.

"Oh come on, you're the one ruining all the fun," Dean said, followed by a deep laugh, and suddenly, Cas knew where Dean was. With fast steps, he walked down the hallway until he reached the dungeon. A sigh of relief escaped him when he saw that he was right, followed by a shiver when Dean suddenly started to grin. It was hard to look at him; to see his demonic features, his true form. Suddenly Cas remembered that Dean could probably see his true form as well, and he shrunk in his spot, looking anywhere but at the hunter.

"What's wrong, angel? Cat got your tongue?"

"Dean, I don't wanna fight," Cas said, his voice thin and he swallowed hard, while he watched as Dean stepped closer.

"Oh, me neither," Dean murmured, only stopping as they were standing right in front of each other, their faces only inches apart.

"I just wanna have some fun," he growled, leaning forward, his lips barely touching Castiel's ear, and Cas shivered again, though this time he wasn't sure if it was out of fear or… something else.

"You're going back to your room. Now," Cas said, trying to sound as confident as possible, but even he knew that his voice was too high and too shaky.

"I don't think so," Dean said, slowly walking around Cas, and Cas couldn't do anything other than to stare at the ground.

"See, I know about your feelings about me. Isn't that fun? The old me was too weak to admit it, too scared to open up, but the point is, you're hot as shit, Cas. Though your true form is… a problem," Dean said as he stepped right in front of Castiel again, and Cas tried his best not to flinch. He knew it was the demonic part of Dean speaking, but hearing that his true form was something Dean hated hurt more than he wanted to admit.

"Dean…" Cas started, but when Dean didn't interrupt, silence stretched between them, because Cas had no idea what he had wanted to say. He knew he should be scared, or at least disgusted, but he couldn't be. It was still Dean, still the hunter that he'd fallen for, and even though he'd turned into a demon for now, he wasn't a different person because of that. In fact, Cas could still see a faint glimmer around Dean's demonic form, so Cas knew he wasn't gone completely, not really, because that glimmer shone in all the wonderful colors of the hunter's soul.

"You wanna have some fun, Cas?" Dean murmured, a smirk on his face, and Cas swallowed hard. His hands clenched to fists, but he couldn't get a word out, not with Dean so close.

"I can make you feel amazing," Dean whispered as he leaned in, their lips so close that Cas wasn't sure if he was breathing actual air, or if he was breathing in Dean. He felt dizzy with desire and he knew it was wrong; the last thing he should feel was desire towards a demon, but he couldn't help it.

"C'mon, say something," Dean mumbled, watching Cas the whole time, and Cas couldn't look away. There was something in Dean's voice, something that made him believe the old Dean, the Dean who cared, was still in there, and a whimper escaped him, while his head started to spin. He just had to lean forward a little, and everything he'd ever wanted, everything he'd dreamed about for years would come true.

But he didn't have to. The second he blinked, Dean surged forward and pressed their lips together, his mouth hot and wanting, his lips plush and soft, and Castiel's eyes fell shut, while another whimper found a way out of his throat. The force with which Dean kissed him made Cas stumble back until his body hit the wall, his head colliding with concrete, but he couldn't feel it, could only feel the heat of Dean's body surrounding him, consuming him. His hands found Castiel's hips, his nails digging into the flesh there, and Cas moaned deeply, his body getting uncomfortably hot. A voice in the back of his head screamed at him to stop this, to run as far away as possible, but Cas knew he wasn't strong enough to do that. This was what he'd been wanting for years, what he'd dreamed of, and now he could have it, so he wouldn't let this opportunity go. He knew that the second they found a way to turn Dean human again things would change between them, most likely in a bad way, but he couldn’t find the strength to care.

"Shit, wanted to do this for so long," Dean murmured against his lips, and Cas whimpered once again, his arms wrapping around Dean's neck to pull him close once more, but Dean seemed to have other plans. Without any effort he spun them around, leading Cas to the center of the room, before an evil smirk spread on his face. Cas was terrified immediately.

"No leaving for you," he said while he pulled a lighter out of his pocket and lit it, before he threw it on the ground. Castiel's eyes widened the second he realized what was going on, but when his body found the strength to actually move, it was too late. A ring of fire surrounded them, heating up the whole room, and Dean chuckled quietly. Castiel's heart started racing, but when he looked into Dean's eyes, he could see something glistening in them that made his whole body feel hot, for a very different reason than the fire surrounding them.

"What, you're not even gonna try to escape? Shit, I would've expected more from you," Dean said, while he grabbed Castiel's face and squeezed his cheeks, hard.

"I know you're still in there Dean, so no, I won't run from you."

This time, Castiel's voice was steady and as he stared into Dean's eyes with a confidence he hadn't felt before, something in Dean's eyes flickered, but it was gone too quickly to tell what it was.

"You sure about that? Maybe I should stuff your mouth with my cock, and we can talk again after," Dean snarled, and Cas' breath hitched. Dean stared at him for a second longer, before he started to grin.

"You'd like that, wouldn't you?" he asked, looking amused, but Cas was tired of lying, tired of pretending the things Dean had said to him over the past couple of days didn't affect him, so he nodded silently, expression calm, eyes wide. Dean's face fell and his jaw dropped open, followed by some cursing. Cas narrowed his eyes, tried to understand what was going on, but the second Dean moved his hand to his crotch to adjust himself, his eyes went wide.

"You're… actually turned on," Cas stated, his voice sounding surprised, and Dean glared at him, while his hands moved to Castiel's shoulders and slowly slid down his arms, until his hands were covered with Dean's. Then, with a sudden move, he tore Castiel’s arms up, and before Cas even had the chance to react, two thick, heavy metal chains were wrapped around his wrists, holding him in place. A gasp escaped him and he looked up, just to see that Dean must've prepared this before, because he couldn't remember any hook being on the ceiling before. His gaze jumped back to Dean, who took a step back with a grin and crossed his arms in front of his chest.

"How about that? Don't know about you, but I think that's much better," he said, lust glistening in his eyes, and for a second Cas thought Dean must've brought out his demon eyes, but as he took a closer look he noticed that no, he hadn't, his pupils were just blown so much that almost no color was visible anymore.

"What do you want from me, Dean?" Cas asked, licking his lips after, and Dean's eyes followed the movement of his tongue, before he spoke.

"I want to fuck you until you're not able to walk anymore. I wanna take you apart and hear you scream my name," he muttered as he stepped closer once again, and Cas couldn't hold back a moan, while his eyes fell shut.

"Look at me," Dean said suddenly, and Cas opened his eyes immediately, just to see Dean holding the end of the chain. When their eyes locked, he pulled, and suddenly Cas was barely touching the ground, his wrists protesting, but his dick twitching in his pants. Dean noticed, judging by how his eyes snapped down to stare at his crotch, and the other man licked his lips, while he slowly tore his gaze up to Castiel's face again.

"Shit, you like that?" Dean asked, while the corner of his mouth turned upwards and he leaned in to bite Castiel's bottom lip, who whimpered quietly. He wouldn't tell Dean how he felt, in no way, but he wasn't able to deny his attraction to the other man, not even in this situation.

"The things I wanna do to you," he muttered and Cas couldn't do anything but stare, but for some reason he wasn't scared. He knew Dean was still in there, and as much as they'd fought in the past, he was sure that Dean wouldn't actually hurt him.

"I'm yours," he said before he could stop himself, and he gasped as Dean's eyes went wide.

"You mean that?" Dean asked, surprise in his voice, and a quick attempt to cover it with a smirk.

"If you say so. Bet you can't wait to have my dick in your mouth," Dean mumbled and let the chain go with a sudden move. Cas was so surprised that he landed on his knees before he was able to react, and the pain shooting through his legs made him hiss loudly.

"Aww, poor angel got hurt?" the other man asked as he crouched down in front of Cas, taking his chin between his fingers and lifting Castiel’s head to look at him properly.

"You should know by now that I don't feel any pain," Cas said, which technically wasn't even a lie; he just didn't expect to feel pain, so his body and his grace weren't prepared.

"So this," Dean reached around himself and pulled something out of his pocket, "shouldn't be a problem for you, right?"

The moment Cas realized that Dean was holding a knife his eyes went wide, but still, he couldn't find it in him to feel scared. A little uneasy maybe, but he wasn't feeling any fear.

"What do you plan to do with that?" he asked quietly, his eyes not leaving the blade, and Dean twisted it in his hand, playing with it for a moment, before he answered.

"I wanna test a theory. If you hold still, it'll be over very quickly," Dean mumbled, while he lifted Castiel's chin even more to expose his throat. Suddenly, it hit him.

"Dean, you - that's not you, you can fight it, I know you can. Please," Cas rasped while the blade moved closer and closer to his skin, but the other man just chuckled.

"It's me, Cas, I'm not possessed, remember? It's all me."

Cas swallowed, and Dean watched his throat move, licking his lips absently. He knew that it was Dean, knew that he was fully aware of what he was doing, but he was still hoping that Dean could turn it off somehow.

"Time to see if I'm right, huh?" Dean said after a moment of silence, and Cas opened his mouth to answer, but he was cut off by Dean lifting the blade and cutting his throat. Cas clenched his teeth, used his grace to stop the bleeding and to numb the pain, and Dean surged forward with a sudden move and covered the wound with his lips, starting to suck. Cas was torn between fighting him and moaning deeply, because even though he knew what Dean was doing was wrong, he had to admit that it turned him on in some weird, fucked up way. Maybe something was wrong with him?

Dean's hands found their way to Castiel's hips and they squeezed, hard enough to leave bruises while moaning deeply, taking in the essence that was necessary for Cas to survive. Cas closed his eyes, blocked out every instinct he had to fight Dean, and just let it happen. In a way, it was even kind of satisfying to know that Dean willingly took a part of himself in, and enjoyed doing it. When the other man slowly pulled back, Cas wasn't sure if he should feel relieved or disappointed.

"Cas…" Dean croaked while he lifted his head, his eyes hooded, turned completely black, but there was a spark in there that hadn't been visible before. As Cas leaned back to look at Dean properly, his eyes widened when he noticed that the light around his demonic form got much brighter.

"Dean," he responded, his voice cracking. Dean swallowed hard, seeming unsure for a second, before he surged forward and captured Castiel's lips with his own. Despite the force, the kiss was much more gentle than before, and Cas couldn't do anything other than kiss Dean back, sighing quietly.

"Want you so bad, angel," Dean mumbled against his lips, and once again Cas could feel his dick twitch in his pants. He could feel that something had shifted inside of Dean, and he seemed much more human than a couple of seconds before. Could it be that his grace was able to heal him?

"Then take me," he answered, unafraid. Dean moaned while he started to fumble with Castiel's clothes, taking them off so fast that Cas couldn't find it in him to protest. He let it happen, and when he was kneeling there without a shirt, he couldn't suppress the reflex to stretch his wings. Dean caught the movement and his gaze jumped to Castiel's wings, which stretched from one end of the room to the other, glowing faintly.

"Shit…" Dean mumbled, blinking a couple of times, and suddenly his black eyes were gone and Cas was able to see the green shining again. He was so lost in Dean's eyes that he didn't notice how the other man stretched his arm, until he felt a sudden touch, which made his whole body shudder. Dean immediately pulled back his hand, looking at Cas with something dangerously close to worry, and Cas shook his head.

"It's alright, you can touch them," he said, and for a second he asked himself if he'd lost his mind somehow, but the moment Dean's fingers brushed through his feathers again, every thought left his head and his body dropped forward, his forehead resting against Dean's shoulder, while a deep moan echoed through the room.

"Feels good?" Dean asked, and all Cas could do was nod, because he was sure he'd never felt anything better in his life. The other man's chest vibrated and Cas was sure he was chuckling, but he couldn't hear a single thing, too focused on his wings being touched for the first time in his whole existence. Dean brushed his fingers through them over and over again, being careful at first, but after noticing Castiel's reactions he got more confused and pulled a little from time to time, making Cas gasp in surprise. The closer Dean got to the roots, the more intense the feeling got, until Cas was so lost in sensation that he didn't even notice how he started rocking back and forth, his cock so hard that it would've hurt if he was lucid enough to notice.

Suddenly, the hand in his wings was gone and Cas lifted his head slowly, opening his eyes just enough to see Dean staring at him in disbelief.

"You… get off on that?" Dean asked, his voice sounding surprised, and Cas actually blushed.

"It's not - it feels nice," he answered honestly, and Dean started to grin before he got up slowly, brushing the dust off of his knees, before he opened his jeans and dropped them in one fluent move, together with his underwear. The second his dick jumped out, Castiel's mouth went dry and he stared at it, licking his lips absently.

"Open your mouth," Dean ordered while he buried one of his hands in Castiel's hair, and Cas obeyed without even questioning it.

"I want you to suck me so good I'm gonna have trouble keeping myself upright," Dean said while he pulled at Cas' hair and wrapped his other hand around the base of his dick, and Cas nodded, eyes wide, his own dick throbbing. Dean stepped closer, until the tip of his dick was right in front of Castiel's face, and Cas stuck out his tongue with a sudden move, tasting Dean for the first time, a moan escaping him while doing so, and Dean hissed.

"Stop teasing and suck it," Dean groaned, pulling at his hair once again, and Cas obeyed immediately, opening his mouth wide and taking him in completely, his eyes falling shut while doing so. The second Cas hollowed his cheeks and started to move his head, Dean's knees buckled and his other hand found its way into Cas' wings again, brushing and pulling right at the roots. Another shudder almost caused Cas to bite down as a reflex, but he stopped himself at the last second, his teeth only grazing Dean's skin, which caused the other man to curse loudly.

"Shit, be careful," he moaned, his grip in Castiel's wings tightening so much that it almost got painful, and Cas pulled back a little and opened his eyes to look up at Dean who was staring down at him, and Cas was sure this was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen. Dean's eyes were wide and focused on him, his pupils blown so much that no green was visible anymore, his jaw hung open slightly and his lips glistened with saliva, and his cheeks were covered in pink, making his freckles stand out even more. There was nothing Cas wanted to do more than to kiss Dean, but since his mouth was currently occupied he sucked even harder, showing Dean how much he wanted this, how much he enjoyed this. The second Cas started to swirl his tongue around the tip of Dean's cock, he got yanked back roughly and watched as Dean gripped the base of his dick, cursing once again.

"Shit, you're driving me crazy," he rasped, before he bent down to grab the chain he'd discarded some time ago and yanked on it. Castiel's arms got pulled up with such a force he couldn't hold back a whimper, and suddenly he was standing right in front of Dean, who let go of the chain and started to take off Cas' pants and underwear, trying to get it off so fast that he was fumbling a lot, but eventually he managed it. The moment Castiel's pants and underwear dropped to the ground Dean stepped around him until Cas could feel his breath on his neck.

"I'm gonna fuck you now, and you're gonna use your grace 'cause I'm way too impatient to open you up," Dean growled right next to his ear, and Cas' knees almost buckled, while he nodded quickly. Closing his eyes, he focused on sending his grace to the right parts of his body, using it to relax his muscles, and just when he opened his eyes again, he could feel the tip of Dean's dick pushing between his butt cheeks, while an arm got wrapped around his waist from behind.

"Ready?" Dean asked, and despite Cas using his grace, he could feel that Dean's cock was slick; he'd probably used some lube as well.

"Dean, I just - I want you to know - "

"Shut up," Dean interrupted him, his voice sharp, but there was a desperation in it that Cas couldn't ignore.

"Dean, please. I want you to know I'm not mad at you, and I won't blame you for doing this," Cas got out in a rush, and he almost expected the other man to get angry, but instead, he could hear a sharp intake of breath, followed by a shuddering exhale.

"You should," Dean whispered and Cas opened his mouth to argue, but he didn't get a word out, because Dean pushed inside of him with one sudden move.

"Holy shit you're tight," Dean groaned the second he bottomed out, and Cas knew exactly what Dean was talking about, he felt huge, but luckily there was no pain.

"Maybe preparation would've helped with that," he pressed out between clenched teeth, fighting hard to stay upright, despite his knees having turned into jelly.

"God, why are you so annoying?" Dean asked, still not moving, and Cas whimpered quietly, trying to ignore how much hearing words like this from Dean hurt. In an attempt to focus on something else, he slowly started moving back and forth, just a little, but it was enough to make Dean moan deeply.

"That greedy, huh?"

"Dean, just move," Cas whined, and Dean actually listened to him. Slowly he pulled out, just to push back in with much more force than before, making Cas almost fall forward.

"Love how you feel, angel," Dean mumbled against Castiel's neck, before he started to place light kisses on his skin, which made Cas shiver. He knew that something must be wrong with him, fundamentally wrong since he was enjoying all of this so much, but he couldn't find it in him to care. Dean spun them around then and pushed Cas forward, forcing him to walk to the wall in front of him.

"Hold yourself up," the other man commanded, and Cas barely got his hands on the wall, before Dean started fucking him for real. Cas gasped, unable to do much more, and when Dean's hands suddenly appeared in his wings once again, his dick twitched and started to leak, while a deep moan rumbled out of his throat. He bent his back a little more to give Dean more access and was rewarded with another string of curses, followed by Dean leaning forward and burying his face in his feathers. Feeling Dean's breath there almost made Cas lose his mind, and everything felt so intense, the touch on his wings, Dean's dick in his ass, his own dick throbbing, and it was almost too much. He knew that he wouldn't last very long, not like this, especially not if Dean would keep his face buried between his wings, but judging by how fast the other man's breath was coming already, he figured that Dean wouldn't last much longer as well. Cas lowered his arm to wrap his still chained hand around his own dick, but Dean reached around him and tore it away, growling quietly.

"Don't you dare, wanna make you come untouched," he rasped, his voice even deeper than normal and his breath coming fast, and Cas moaned once again as his dick twitched heavily.

"Dean, I don't know if - if I - "

"You're not gonna come if you can't come like that," Dean said, and suddenly, something hot and wet appeared between Cas' wings, making him rear up in surprise. Dean licked along the roots of his wings, even grazed his teeth over his skin from time to time, while continuing to pound into Cas. There was a coil of heat in Castiel's lower stomach, tightening with every lick, with every thrust, and just when he thought he couldn't bear it anymore, Dean spoke again.

"Shit, gonna come into you angel, gonna mark you from the inside," Dean growled, and Cas' vision went white. He felt like his whole body was exploding, his grace trying to escape, lightning up the whole room, and his body started to shiver, while his dick twitched and twitched, shooting out spurt after spurt of come. He faintly noticed Dean tensing, before he could feel him throb as well, but he was so lost in his own feelings that he couldn't find it in him to care. He'd had sex one time before but it hadn't even come close to what he felt right this second. If he didn’t know better, Cas could swear that this was how a human soul must feel in heaven, completely at peace, pure bliss flooding them.

"Cas? Cas!"

Cas opened his eyes slowly, blinking against the light in the room, until his vision wasn't blurry anymore and he could see Dean's face right in front of his own.

"Dean," he rasped, his throat dry, and it took him a second to realize that he was sitting on the ground, his back against the wall. Did he pass out? Was it possible to pass out during sex?

"Shit, you kinda scared me," Dean said, but he quickly pulled the hand that was resting on Cas' cheek back.

"What happened?" Cas asked, now seriously confused, but for some reason something warm spread in his chest when he realized that Dean had been worried, despite being a demon.

"I dunno, you came and then I came and - shit, you kinda… left your vessel for a second, I guess," Dean said, looking a little guilty, and Cas couldn't hold back a chuckle.

"That seems plausible," he answered honestly, and Dean let out a sigh, shaking his head.

"You could've warned me, y'know."

"I didn't know this was possible," Cas said, and Dean gave him a doubtful look, but then his gaze jumped to the door.

"You're gonna put me back in that awful room?" he asked, his voice a little shaky and he wasn't looking at Cas.

"I don't want to, but - "

"But you have to, yeah, alright," Dean mumbled, brushing a hand over his face, and seeing him like that felt like a stab through Castiel's heart. When Cas checked if the glow from his grace was still surrounding Dean's demonic form, he had to smile, because for some reason it was even brighter than before, which would explain why Dean was acting almost human again.

"Cas..."

Dean looked up, and for a second Cas thought he could see the other man's eyes filled with tears, but Dean blinked quickly, and it was gone again.

"Dean, let us help you," Cas mumbled, cupping his face with his hands in a soft gesture, and Dean inhaled a shuddering breath.

"Please..." he mumbled, and his voice sounded so full of hurt, Cas almost couldn't take it. Then, with a sudden move, Dean got up and put out the fire. He walked to the door after putting on his clothes, but once he reached it, he turned around again, looking at Cas sitting on the floor, still completely naked.

"I'm counting on you, man," Dean said, his voice cracking, before he turned once more and left the dungeon. Just like that, he was gone.

Tag list: @charliesfandomlife @sam--ships--it @green-blue-heller @professorerudite @fallenangelsera @jmlovers @spnmrvlshrlck @thebluelynxx @lulu-zodiac @bigartpuppy @greenpugmire @supernatural4life2022

Let me know if you wanna be added/removed 😊

#dean winchester #castiel #destiel #destiel fanfiction #destiel fanfic #destiel fic #JasWrites #have to change that tag btw #demon dean #angel castiel #deancas #deancas fanfiction #deancas fanfic #deancas fic

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michaelmilligan · 3 years

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Day 4 of B&B's (@drgarth and @starrynightdeancas) Holiday Advent Calendar Event! (Aka the one I wrote in parallel to day 3 so it's done nearly at the same time. Only this is 3k of Midam. There's still no Starbucks.)

Take A Family Photo//Ugly Christmas Sweaters//"We Wish You A Merry Christmas"

“Come on, Michael,” Adam said, using his best puppy eyes. Those worked nine out of ten times – and he could see Michael's resolve faltering already.

“Fine.” Michael sighed and changed his visage so that he was wearing a Christmas sweater over his t-shirt.

“And the hat,” Adam said, putting on his own Santa hat.

Michael narrowed his eyes at him.

“Okay okay, leave the hat.” He kissed Michael softly, then pulled away to head for the kitchen. “Now. I'm gonna go check on the cookies, can you open the door when the guys come? They should be here any moment now.”

He felt more than heard the next sigh. “Alright,” Michael called after him.

Dean wasn't sure what he had expected, but it hadn't been Michael – it took him a moment to recognise his 'visage', since he had only seen it, like, twice – in an ugly Christmas sweater. At least Cas and Sam seemed just as thrown as he was, staring at him in surprise and mild concern.

(Keep reading under the cut)

Only Jack took it in stride. “Hi, Michael,” they said, raising a hand in that awkward kind of greeting they must have learned from Sam.

“Hello,” Michael said tonelessly, then simply walked away, leaving them at the open door. A moment later, Dean heard him call: “Adam, you brothers are here. And your brother-in-law and nephew.”

Jack entered the apartment and the other three followed them slowly, none of them seeming sure if they were actually allowed to. But Adam had invited them, right? So it was cool. It was just Michael who was being weird, right?

“You know they're also your brother and nephew, right?” Dean heard Adam ask.

Jack was already following the voices, and Sam, Cas and Dean (in that order) followed them down the hallway. And man, what a hallway. Not only was it clear that this apartment was big just from how spacious it was (Dean also counted four doors leading from it and glimpsed a bedroom the size of an entire motel room), but it was also practically covered in garland. All along the walls, just above head height (or at head height, if you were a giant moose like Sam), ran a line of holly with red berries and stars on it, interwoven with fairy lights.

Dean barely registered Michael's answer to Adam (a sighed 'technically') as he took in the sight. When he finally entered the kitchen, he had to hold back a gasp. There was even more garland in here, held in blue and silver, the fairy lights illuminating everything enough that they didn't need the overhead lights at all.

The kitchen was also big, but still a bit cramped with all six of them in there.

“Hi,” Adam said, grinning. He was wearing the same kind of garish sweater that Michael did, with an apron over it.

“What's with the sweaters?” Dean asked, only realizing after it had come out of his mouth that this might not be the most appropriate greeting.

“Uh, it's Christmas. Gotta go big or go home, right?”

“But you are home,” Jack said. They all looked at them. “What?”

“It's an expression,” Michael told him. “It means to either do everything or nothing.”

“Ah.” Jack nodded in understanding.

“Yeah.” Adam finished putting a bunch of cookies into a bowl and handed it to Michael. “Put this on the coffee table. And everyone else can follow him to the living room, I'll be right there.”

Dean expected Michael to throw a fit, maybe threaten to smite Adam for being expected to follow a human's instruction – but instead, he just walked off again, the cookie bowl in hand. Hesitantly, the others followed him back into the hallway, then into the living room. Once again, Dean was struck by how much garland there was – in red and gold, here, matching the Christmas tree that was standing in a corner near the TV.

Dean whistled. “Nice. That thing must be 80 inches at least.”

“88,” Michael said, glancing between Dean and the TV while he deposited the cookies on the coffee table.

“Awesome.” Dean heard Cas sigh and saw Sam rolling his eyes, but he ignored them. A man needed to have priorities.

Adam walked in after them and gestured to the couches. “What are you standing around for? Sit.” He went and took a seat himself. “Or don't, I'm not the boss of you. But I'm not gonna stand around all afternoon.”

Michael sat down next to him. Jack and Sam chose the two armchairs while Cas and Dean took the other couch. It was surprisingly comfy.

“This place is really nice,” Sam said, sounding too surprised for it to be a platitude.

“Yeah, well. We gotta thank Jack for that.”

Dean frowned at Adam. “What do you mean?”

“Uh, they got us the place? What, didn't they tell you?”

When they all looked to Jack, they nodded. “Yeah. Michael asked me for it in exchange for his help in Heaven. Back when I still had God-powers.” They shrugged and reached for the cookies. “You know, like I got you the house by the lake. I figured they deserved something nice after all that time in Hell.”

Dean winced, and saw Sam and Cas do the same. They all felt bad for that – they really had kind of abandoned Adam to his fate. But it had already cost so much to get Sam out, and they'd been worried about accidentally releasing Michael... And okay, maybe the guy wasn't trying to kick-start the apocalypse anymore, but they couldn't have known that back in the day, right?

Sam cleared his throat. “Yeah. Makes sense.”

“Did you make these cookies?” Jack suddenly asked, beaming. There were crumbs in the corner of their mouth and they were already reaching for more.

“Yeah. Tried out a few recipes – some turned out better than others.” Adam grimaced. “Don't worry, you're only getting the ones that passed the taste-test.”

Curious, Dean grabbed a few cookies for himself. There were a variety of them, some sugar cookies, some chocolate, some that Dean wasn't quite sure. He bit into one that was shaped like a snowman. “Holy shit, this is good,” he said, or tried to around the rest of the cookie that he was stuffing into his mouth simultaneously.

Adam grinned. “Guess they passed the Winchester taste-test, too.”

“U-huh,” Dean made around another cookie.

Sam huffed and rolled his eyes while Cas looked at Dean fondly.

“Oh. I almost forgot,” Adam suddenly said, springing up from the couch to turn on a stereo that Dean hadn't noticed on a shelf before. Adam turned down the volume after the first few notes, probably so they wouldn't need to shout to understand each other.

We wish you a merry Christmas,

And a happy new year

When Adam returned to the couch, he sat with his thigh pressed to Michael's. Dean looked at that for a long moment, completely forgetting the comment about overdoing the whole Christmas stuff that had been on the tip of his tongue.

Michael and Adam weren't- they weren't, right? They couldn't be. This was Michael they were talking about. So maybe he let Adam talk him into wearing an ugly ass Christmas sweater, and putting cookies on the coffee table, and staying with him in the first place while also letting him use the body as he wanted and not controlling his every move-

Adam and Michael shared a soft smile.

Oh shit, they were, weren't they.

“Um,” Sam made, frowning at where Michael had just put his hand on Adam's thigh. He cleared his throat. “Um, so... Do you have anything planned for Christmas Eve?”

“There's a Christmas party at a venue Adam regularly visits,” Michael said.

“A party at a...” Sam smiled in that way that said he was completely confused, then frowned.

“It's a bar,” Adam told them, giving Michael a look. “And we both go there.”

“Technically we always go everywhere together.”

Adam rolled his eyes. “The guys have literally met you.”

“Once,” Michael specified.

“Well, I've only been there a couple times too. It's not like we've been living here for that long.” Adam put his hand over Michael's on his thigh and Dean once again found himself staring.

“It's great that you already made friends,” Jack interjected, smiling. They seemed to be the only one not weirded out by this whole... thing. Even Cas looked uncomfortable, though not especially surprised – Dean would have to quiz him on that later.

“Yeah, well. Not that hard with those guys. You buy a round and sing along to Britney Spears and bam, you're part of the gang.”

Michael huffed, but he didn't look annoyed. Actually, he looked pretty... fond, for lack of a better word. And Dean was desperately searching for a better word.

When they'd driven over here, Dean had wished that his mom was with them. For some reason, she had gotten along with Adam better than anyone else in that brief time that he'd stayed with them. But now he was glad that she was on a hunt with Eileen – she wouldn't have liked this new development either. Not after her time in apocalypse world with the other Michael.

Of course Dean knew, logically, that this was another Michael. But he'd still almost caused the apocalypse in their world, once upon a time. And just because he was apparently playing house with Adam now, didn't mean that Dean had to trust him.

“Britney Spears?” Sam asked, still frowning.

Good point – at what bar did 'the guys' sing along to Britney?

“Hey, does anyone want eggnog?” Adam asked instead of an answer, getting up from the couch again and walking towards the kitchen. “We also bought beer, if you prefer that. It's from a local brewery.”

Seemed like Adam was really putting down roots here. Becoming a regular at a bar, buying from local shops... “I'll take a beer,” Dean called after him.

Adam came back with a few bottles of beer, a bottle of eggnog and several glasses. After giving Sam and Dean a beer and Cas a glass of eggnog, he hesitated with Jack. “Uh, are you allowed to drink yet?”

Jack weighed their head. “Well, I'm three, but I look like I'm twenty-three and I'm a half-angel who was technically God for a while.” They considered it. “Also, I've had alcohol before.”

“Oh, okay.” Adam glanced at Cas, who shrugged. “Beer or eggnog?”

“I don't like eggnog. It tastes like raw egg with alcohol.” Jack made a face. Dean was pretty sure that was the whole point of eggnog, but he didn't comment.

“Beer it is.” Adam put a bottle down in front of him.

For himself, he poured a glass of eggnog, then moulded himself against Michael's side again.

“So, did you guys renovate the lake house yet?” he asked amicably. Obviously, he knew more about Cas and Dean's place than they had about his.

Cas and Dean shared a look. “We started, but it's a lot of work,” Dean said. “Might take months.”

Cas took his hand and squeezed it. “Possibly years.”

“Okay? I'm guessing from your happy faces that that's a good thing.”

Dean shrugged, suddenly feeling a bit stupid about how excited he was about the house.

“After all this time hunting monsters and trying to avert the end of the world, this is finally a project that doesn't threaten any lives and that we get to do at our own pace,” Cas said. “So yes, that's a very good thing in my book.”

Leave it to Cas to make him feel better about himself. Dean loved him so freaking much.

In turn, Adam looked surprised, but nodded. Michael was still looking at Adam, holding his hand. Dean felt like throwing up, and not from this weird beer.

“An IPA?” Sam asked, studying the bottle in his hand, not even seeming like he was reaching for something to say. Almost as if he really was interested.

Damn hippie.

“Yeah. It's all the rage now, apparently. Among beer drinkers, at least.” Adam shrugged. “I dunno, I don't know that many butches.”

“What?” Dean frowned at him.

“What?” Adam asked, and drank more of his eggnog.

“Hey, can we take a family photo?” Jack suddenly asked. They turned towards Adam. “I want to make a scrapbook, like Garth and Bess have them.”

“Oh. Sure. If everyone's cool with that?” Adam asked, and really, that wasn't fair. Now anyone who said no would be the bad guy.

“I think that's a very good idea,” Cas said, and his overly polite tone suggested that there was a 'but' coming, “but I would understand if some people were not comfortable with that.” He looked at Michael.

Michael didn't look at him, still concentrated on Adam.

Sam cleared his throat. “Uh, I'm in, but. Someone has to take the photo, right? Or do you have a camera with remote release, Adam?”

“No, my only camera is my phone.”

“I can work the camera remotely,” Michael said.

Remotely? Was he saying that he wanted to be in the picture? Jesus fucking Christ.

Dean wondered if he would wake up from a fever dream any moment now.

“How?” Sam asked in surprise, eyes glistening in that way that said 'I will write this down later man I wish I had a pen and paper right now'.

“Telekinesis. All angels are capable of this.” Michael glanced at Cas.

“Right.” Cas frowned. “I never thought to use it for taking pictures.”

“Well, what else are you using your powers for these days?”

Cas opened his mouth, closed it again. As far as Dean knew, he barely used his powers at all. They did everything by hand at the lake house, so except for him being stupidly strong and able to carry everything as long as he could balance it, Dean was rarely ever reminded that his husband was non-human.

They all lined up in front of the Christmas tree. Jack found the right height and distance for his phone, then Michael levitated it to keep it there as Jack came back to stand between Dean and Adam. Michael had his arm around Adam's waist.

“So... can we take the picture now?” Jack asked.

Then he remembered something.

“Wait. What about Bastet?”

“Oh, shit! You're right, once second!” Adam bolted from the room, leaving Michael with a group of extremely confused Winchesters (and Winchester-Klines).

“Bastet, the goddess?” Castiel asked, frowning.

“Yes, Castiel, the Egyptian Goddess of fertility and protection against evil spirits lives in our apartment and counts as a member of our family,” Michael said sarcastically, pleased when Castiel's eyebrows went up to his forehead.

“There we go.” Adam came back into the room with Bastet in his arms. They were curled against his chest, obviously eager to sleep.

“You have a cat?” Jack asked in excitement. “Can I pet it?”

“They're a bit sleepy. I just disturbed their nap, so they might not be very keen on being pet right now.” Just as Adam said it, Bastet stretched, and blinked an eye open to look at Jack. Then the second eye opened, and Bastet stared.

Bastet lowered their head and raised their butt, clearly going into hunting mode. Michael sighed and reached over to scratch behind their ear. They seemed surprised, but eventually leaned into it.

“Can I pet them now? Why are they looking at my wings?” Jack asked, bouncing on their heels.

“They like angel wings. Could look at Michael's for hours.” Adam grinned. “They tried to hunt his wings a few times, but I think by now they got that it's impossible. Maybe they think they have another chance with yours, though.”

“Aw, they're so cute.” Jack looked a bit like that emoji Adam had dubbed 'anime eyes emoji'. The one with the big eyes that were more light reflection than the black of usual emoji eyes.

“You can try petting them if you want, but be careful. They're a bit wary of strangers,” Adam warned them.

Castiel had stepped up to them, looking fond as Jack reached out and lightly brushed their fingers over Bastet's fur.

“Oh, it's so soft! I've never pet a cat, are they all like this?”

“I think so. At least when their fur is clean.” Adam frowned. “Though I guess there are hairless cats. They wouldn't have fur to begin with.”

Jack suddenly gasped as Bastet started purring. “What are they doing?”

“They like being pet. Have you never heard a cat purr?”

Jack's eyes widened impossibly further as they shook their head. They seemed to be completely overwhelmed by the experience. “Dad, they're so cute! Can we get a cat, too?”

Castiel looked between them and the cat, glanced back towards Dean. “Um. We should think that through before we commit to taking an animal into our family, Jack. We need to... read up about how to care for a cat, and make sure that we know what responsibilities we would put upon-”

“I will take all responsibility!” Jack exclaimed.

“Okay, buddy,” Dean interrupted them, “let's just take the picture now and we'll talk about getting a pet when we're home, okay?”

Jack looked between Bastet and Dean, then sighed deeply, their shoulders and wings drooping. “Okay.”

“You know, if your dads are mean and don't let you have one, you can always visit us and play with Bastet,” Adam said casually, grinning when Dean and Castiel both glared at him.

Adam was, as the humans said, 'being a little shit' – and Michael loved him so much.

#Yes Adam wears the Santa hat the whole time including the photo and the rest of the night #And if you were wondering the emoji Michael references is this one: 🥺#Midam #Adamichael #Destiel #Casdean #Jack Winchester-Kline my beloved #And their dad Castiel Kline-Winchester #And Sam is there too I guess #Changing POV #Bastet the cat makes a sleepy return #They're a fierce hunter! But oooh being scratched behind the ear feels good #Michael has to protect everyone in this household (from the fierce hunter cat)#What else #That's basically a John Mulaney reference at the end #Anyway this got long sorry I totally understand if y'all don't have the attention span for reading this #I'm just glad I had the attention span to write it #Also Mary and Eileen are the only ones doing any work while the boys are having fun #b&badventcalendar #Supernatural fanfiction

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