#cas is no better and he deserves to have people be angry with him for what he did | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

kerrikins · 10 months

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Given everything I thought that I would briefly hop on here in order to express some of my thoughts. Anyone who follows me on twitter will have already seen this but I know there are some who only follow me on here so here I am.

For me what has been released a couple of weeks ago and now today changes relatively little for me, in large part mostly because with the leaks three weeks ago I assessed how I felt about their contents and came to a decision that while I was disappointed, frustrated and hurt (especially for Bible, who I adore), I felt that his actions and what we've seen since January show a true desire to change and be a better person.

I also did not and still do not trust the source, nor do I respect the clear and obvious motivations behind this ongoing attempt to blackmail and bully Build out of public life. She has outright stated that she 'made' him and will destroy him, and what has been going on since January is her attempt to do just that. She consistently times things to coincide with events for him - his concert, the XBlush announcement and now the Starry Magazine announcement. The way that people seem so unwilling to think analytically about the downright strategic way she's approached this and what that might mean really frustrates me, but it is what it is at this point.

(I will add here for those who aren't aware, though - the account releasing this information outright stated during the last leaks that the intent is to get Build to resign from the entertainment industry. That, my friends, is called coercion and blackmail. It's not acceptable no matter how you feel about him.)

There is also the plain and simple fact that I cannot stomach or stay silent in the face of the unrelenting vitriol that has been hurled in this man's direction by his ex and by the fandom and the internet in general since January. I am an older fandom member and I really can't think of a time where I've seen the sort of unceasing tide of hatred that has been going on towards Build since the news broke.

I adore Bible, and most of the other cast members. I will be clear here and say that I am not defending what Build said in those screenshots (I think they reveal he is an insecure and jealous man in need of some therapy, who also had a partner who brought out the absolute worst in him) and that I cannot and will not expect any fan who is uncomfortable, hurt, angry or unhappy with Biu's actions and words to stay with him or support him. If you are uncomfortable with me supporting him then please feel free to unfollow me and go in peace, I wish you well as long as you do not spread hatred against him. I do not expect any of the cast members to remain friends with him or support him and you will not see me spreading hatred towards them, nor have I ever once done so since January.

I will just continue to speak up to say that I think that if - and I know there is a big if here - Build has done as he claims and started fresh from January, then he deserves the chance to make that fresh start.

It disturbs me that right now he is not being allowed to do so.

It disturbs me that at least two private images of him were released for millions to see and there's been very little blow-back about it and in fact very little discussion about it. I am reminded once again of the allegations that Build 'slept with her for the role' and the display of hypocrisy that was on display then and is on display now. If someone did these things to a woman the internet would be calling for their head no matter what she had said in private chats.

It disturbs me to see the mockery and games going on over on Twitter, with things such as people filming themselves laughing over Bible unfollowing yesterday, or giving away money for cast members unfollowing today. Some people really need to step away from their computers, touch some grass and assess the depths to which they're stooping.

This isn't a game. This is someone's life. This is the life of ALL of the cast members. Do people really think that it's funny and a joke and a great old time when these cast members they support make the decision to unfollow Build? It really feels like people have forgotten the reality of the situation here - to them it is just a fun time when the truth is whether it's a business decision or a personal one, I doubt anyone is experiencing *good* feelings about this.

If I ever find out that Build has done any of the things that he did in the screenshots since January then I will cease my support. However I can tell you right now that I will not participate in the fandom war or the ongoing crusade against him. I would simply cease to follow or interact with him and stop speaking about him, and that is all.

I wish that more people would make that same choice.

To people who still support him, my thoughts are with you as I know that right now is incredibly tough. 💗

To those who support ones he has spoken poorly of, I appreciate how you must be feeling, I just hope you will not engage in hatred.

I am taking a break from twitter and likely from this fandom in general because between work and fandom things have been pretty shit right now, but you might see me around for other fandoms.

That's all for now.

#build jakapan

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ivanzplaid · 2 years

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Hiya 🫶🏻 this is sort of an odd request but it was a random thought. Maybe a fic where The Grabber is out and about and he hears some people talking about his current victim. Maybe they aren’t very liked? And some mean things are said or maybe they talk about him? So it upsets the grabber and he seeks comfort from them when he gets back home. I’m sure whatever you do it’ll be good 💙💙

hi!! i've read this so many times because i imagine the grabber is a sympathetic person, and depending on the bond you two have built, he would definitely take it to heart oml

requests r open & i cant wait to see the thoughts yall have!!

If i had to describe this fic in one word i'd go with mellow, lot like the beat of 'i think i like when it rains' by willis almost

The Grabber x Gn Reader!

Warnings: Alot, The Grabber, Manipulation, Stalking ( mentioned ), Hated reader, Abducted reader, Fluff/Angst ish??, Obsessiveness, Possessiveness

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Whispers could be heard from every direction as Al walked through the store, discussing the towns newest lost cause. It had only been a week and a half since you were taken, abducted on what was your evening walks. You were never easy, not when you were taken, and not before. Maybe it was your short fuse, and your angry nature, but you just didn't have a positive reputation, and Al found that out when he went shopping for more food for you. The woman and men discussed what your fate could possibly be, in hushed manners.

"They're probably dead, they don't have a single ounce of common sense in them to live longer than a day."

"If not dead, then beaten to half of it."

"Good. That little punk was no good anyhow."

"This Grabber did us a favor."

The words bounced in Al's head. He pondered what could make such a person say vile things, you were well behaved, maybe the occasional mishap, but in his eyes, you were good. It made him infuriated to hear this gossip about you, another person goes missing and the town gossips? Unprofessional. The kids were no better. Talking between one another what 'The Grabber' was doing to you, sick jokes being passed around, even some praising him so that you could learn a lesson, it made him irritated to hear, hands gripping the cart harder as he picked up more food he thought you'd enjoy. He slowly shook his head as he paced by more people, you truly were the talk of the town.

Fuckin' sickos.

Don't get him wrong, he stalked you before taking you, obsessing over your every move, good & bad. He saw you for everything you were, your lowest and highest, and he still adored you. Your actions weren't preferable, you did live up to the 'punk' title, but it was just cruel what came out of their mouths, or at least thats what he thought. From the beginning to end, all he thought of was you, you deserved so much more than what you were given, this town molded you into the thing they hated.

As his van parked in the driveway, he picked up the grocery bags with ease, one in each hand, and made his way into his little humble abode. The house was exactly as he left it, he always inspected it as soon as he got in, its not that he didn't trust you, but just as extra precaution for his nerves. Dropping the paper bags on the table, he snatched a mask, the lower smiling face mask attached to him quickly as he headed down the stairs. Conversations replayed in his head, even if you couldn't hear them, it made his heart ache for you. The metal door opened creakily, displaying you on the mattress, head angled at the ceiling, eyes closed gracefully. He stood there leniently, watching you, once again wondering how somebody could wish harm upon you. Your figure had him hypnotized, soaking in the peacefulness that you radiated in your sleeping state. It was despicable how they criminalized you, but lucky for you, he would always be at your side, never dehumanizing you or making you feel as horrid as society did. No, Al would make you feel loved and cared for, he knew that you felt the pressure, and he judt wanted to lift it off of you, so that was his plan.

Closing the door behind him, his feet took him over to you, putting himself next to you. His hands caressed your hair, feeling its texture gently in his hand. You were simply divine, another thing he cherished from you. Your skin, your hair, your personality, it enticed him, it may have made you stick out like a sore thumb before, but he appreciated you, to the truest extent. When your eyes fluttered open, the quickly landed on the man next to you, his eyes were filled with hurt, dismay about something you couldn't see.

"Something.. wrong?"

Your voice was tired, trying to make sense after you just woke up. To be fair, it did startle you seeing him next to you, normally he would be making dinner for you, but something put a fork in his schedule. The way he stared at you, and you hated admitting this, but it was nice. His stare didn't make you feel agitated, it wasn't hateful like when you were seen outside by adults, or anywhere in general by authorities. The man who looked at you now was sympathetic towards you, like he was willing to give you a chance, something you hadn't been given in the past.

"Oh, nothing. Y'know, some adults can be vile."

His words sounded weak, coming out as if he was exhausted. His hand pulled away from your hair, only to return to your shoulder, lightly pulling you into him, and you accepted it. He'd never shown so much sad expression before, and you knew this would be a moment between you two. His hand caressed you, securing you like he knew what you were thinking. He spoke once more, tone still soft.

"You're not a bad person to me. I know you've been treated as such before."

Then again, maybe he did know what you were thinking. Whatever consisted of his day, he seemed to take a new liking to you, and you wouldn't say its the worst thing to come out of this. You found yourself leaning your head onto his shoulder, he welcomed you. The silence that filled the room was comfortable, it suited the both of you. To him, it showed you opened up, that it was an unspoken bond. He wanted to make you feel safe and loved, and if it meant to have silence, then so be it. To you, the silence made your breathing easier, and your thoughts slow down. A headache had formed when you were speaking, the memories of before filled your mind, harassing you endlessly. The silence confirmed that he respected you, and its just what you needed at the moment,

for somebody to respect you.

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gonna be real, i have no idea how to feel about this fic😭 i dont wanna say its bad, but feels like a dead end for some reason and i cant put my finger on it, so if you want me to redo it i will 🫶🫶

thannkkk you for the request, always a joy to see your name pop up because i know the request will be bomb, and hopefully its up to your expectations!!

#the grabber #the grabber x reader #black phone #ethan hawke #the grabber x you #queer #slasher #daddy fr #hot killer #the black phone

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foolondahill17 · 1 year

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Been reading a lot of @angelsdean posts about the differences between Dean and John's anger, and I just wanted to add that Dean apologizes all. the. time. unlike John who apologizes once (?) at the end of 2x1 right before he dies. (And in "Lebanon" but I find that episode difficult to wrangle because John is *so* out of character throughout).

But Dean is out there apologizing left and right if someone calls him out on his behavior or sometimes even just because he's done the self-reflection himself. The first time we see him apologize, it's to Sam in "Scarecrow." We see him apologize to Sam multiple times again, in addition to Ben, Lisa, Charlie, Jack, and Cas.

Crucially, I do want to add that, although Dean frequently apologizes, these apologies aren't particularly impactful because he rarely changes his behavior. He's caught in a viscous cycle of explosive-fear-anger, guilt, shame, and trying to do better while lacking the tools to improve, which leads to another explosion.

In Dean's Purgatory confession to Cas he basically says this in his own words: he doesn't know why he gets so angry. It's something he feels like he can't control. He doesn't know how to stop.

But, Dean's willingness to apologize is evidence, to me, that he is more self-aware of his anger than John is. Dean is aware of his impulse to lash out, but he lacks the coping mechanisms to change his behavior. We never see that kind of self-reflection from John.

This boils down to the biggest reason why I find it difficult to write Dean off as an abuser or just another angry man. Yes, often the people around Dean deserve better. Cas, Jack, and Sam all deserve to be treated better. But Dean - with the right support and growth - has the capacity to become the better that Jack, Cas, and Sam deserve. This is also true of John: Sam and Dean deserved a better father. John could have become that better father, but, tragically, he ran out of time before he could try or even gain enough self-awareness to come to the conclusion there were things he needed to change.

#sad dean thoughts

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wttt-dirus-work · 5 months

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Character ask game - 1, 2, 7, 12, 15, 16, 17, and 22 for New Jersey and for Florida

Hey! Thanks Anon! Thats not a small list lmao

So, starting with New Jersey:

1. Why do you like or dislike this character?

I like him because, first he's underrated. Dude's always compared to New York (which i do like also) or Penn, and he deserve some love too. Also, he got the Pines, and im a sucker for anything cryptids or supernatural; the Jersey Devil is something i love to read about, and i find it so funny (in a good way) how it's a big thing for Jersey's people. I'm also a sucker for grumpy character who show their love by actions instead of words (my love language is giving gifts/actions so...) I also love the northeast attitude of "Only I can fuck with you." since im kinda like that with my friends (i respect boundaries tho ^^)

2. Favorite canon thing about this character?

Tourette's. I know Ben stopped giving him it to prevent tics for viewers (which is something i respect) but i always love characters having disabilities and representing them as normal. I also love the sibling-like relationship he has with NY most of the time.

7. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you like?

When y'all are giving him anger issue, or when he's the mom friend while not taking care of himself. I'm the mom friend, and i relate so hard to forcing people to take care of themselves (we're both hypocrites lol)

12. What's a headcanon you have for this character?

The scars and anxiety issues. Dude's more anxious than me, always wanting to make a good impression in formal event.

He bites too. No i won't elaborate.

15. What's your favorite ship for this character? (Doesn't matter if it's canon or not)

I mean, I got my own ship of him/QC so that's my favourite i guess? Tho i do like NY/NJ (in the world they aren't sibling) and i do like NJ/RI too.

16. What's your least favorite ship for this character?

I don't realy have a least favourite i think? Like, you can ship whatever you want, i don't really care tho. But i guess i don't see him with any of the midwest states ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

17. What's a ship for this character you don't hate but it's not your favorite that you're fine with?

NJ/CA or like any other ship that are not in my favourite list. It's the first coming to mind, but like i don't hate any ship (unless it's abusive, because i hate toxic relationship; i don't like them so i don't read them. If both parties learn from the mistakes and apologise and make some self introspection and get better, well then i don't mind. but plainly abusive? yeah no not my cup of tea)

22. If you're a fic reader, what's something you like in fics when it come to this character? Something you don't like?

Well, im a sucker for Tourette's jersey, so i love when people add it to their fic.

I don't like when he's being degrated in a condescending way; you can tease him, like the northeast does with food fight or whatever, but don't be mean to be mean. An please, give him more character than just being "Angry" all the time (i maybe only saw it once, but like i really don't like it. Give your characters some depth, more than just stereotypes)

Now doing Florida:

1. Why do you like or dislike this character?

He makes me laugh, and how impredictable he is makes it even better.

What i dislike? I wouldn't be able to manage him, like at all in real life. Dude would terrify me.

2. Favorite canon thing about this character?

He doesn't know how to read, but he knows how to write? and i love his relationship with Louisiana. Oh, and he always start chaos for the fun of it lmao

7. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you like?

He's crazy, and owns it. He knows he ain't the smartest but still prefer to fuck with Gov/Cal than rectify it.

12. What's a headcanon you have for this character?

He's the most cryptid looking. He got sharp teeth, gator's eye, and his skin is scaley when you touch him. There's something about him that makes you uncomfortable; your brain know there's something wrong with him.

15. What's your favorite ship for this character? (Doesn't matter if it's canon or not)

Flo/Loui, hands down. I also love Flo/Connecticut, or Flo/Cal, but flouie is my to go.

16. What's your least favorite ship for this character?

Flo/Mother nature. I don't really like her so... yeah. personal preference.

17. What's a ship for this character yo don't hate but it's not your favorite that you're fine with?

Him with anyone else(?) than Loui, cut or cal

22. If you're a fic reader, what's something you like in fics when it come to this character? Something you don't like?

He's the main reason for chaos.

I don't like when people don't flesh his character out. He's more than the dumb one; he delightfully smart in his chaotic way.

Thanks for the ask!

#wttt #welcome to the table #welcome to the statehouse #wttsh #ben brainard #dirus think #ask #wttt new jersey #wttt florida #wttt headcanons

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theminecraftbox · 1 year

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What if the prison trio met with Team Free Will 1.0? I’m interested mostly in the differences in morals, but also in the idea of some designs that I’ve seen for c!Sam and c!Quackity. c!Sam, from the designs I’ve seen, looks not even close to human, and that’s without the centaur idea some people choose to add. c!Quackity has been drawn with wings a lot. I’m just curious because I’m not very good at analyzing characters, and you’re amazing at it.

Funnily enough, I think all of TFW would like c!Sam at first glance. Sam W. would see an earnest and somewhat awkward engineer trying to do his best under difficult circumstances; Dean would see a righteous man; Cas would see someone well-meaning fumbling in the dark.

c!Sam has the potential to really appeal to Dean’s sensibilities—under the right set of circumstances (ie circumstances where c!Sam is agreeing with Dean), I think Dean would find c!Sam’s combination of zero tolerance moral extremism and righteous self-martyrdom very sympathetic. Dean and c!Sam would get along like a house on fire when Dean’s in a mood to lock up or murder Jack, for instance.

But this could go over the edge very quickly. I think Sam W. would realize pretty swiftly the type of person c!Sam is, and oppose him vehemently as soon as c!Sam tips his hand or gets a liiittle too gung ho about righteous violence. Dean would be harder to convince, depending on circumstances, again—easy to convince if c!Sam targets someone he likes, less so if otherwise. Cas would soon find his superiority grating, and the abuse of power disgusting.

Dean would like Quackity instantly. Sure, this kid is trying too hard to look tough, but Dean’s been there. In general, Dean probably wouldn’t be terribly phased by Quackity’s violence; I think it wouldn’t be hard for Dean to be convinced that Quackity only tortures people who deserve it, for information that’s important. Cas would imitate Dean and try gamely to laugh along with Quackity’s jokes. Sam W would hate him instantly: the machismo, the way Dean likes him, the falseness.

Dean would loathe c!Dream. c!Dream’s cavalier, smug, ~reasonable~ villain persona is perfect to make Dean despise him on sight. It would be even worse if Dean has managed to hear stories from other members of the server first. Kill the fucker. Some people are way past saving.

I feel like Cas would guiltily like c!Dream, admiring and sympathizing with his attitude while condemning him. Cas has done worse to try to preserve his own home, hasn’t he? He gets it. He’s been taught better, of course. But he gets it.

Sam W would look at c!Dream and see the damage and his stomach would twist. He’d hear the plan to destroy death and he’d think about his soulless self and he’d feel sick. He’d look at the prison and look at the scars and hear a cell, a Warden, a torturer, alone, one year. He’d listen to c!Dream laughing about how it’s his home, and how he and c!Sam are friends now anyway, and he’d understand. Honestly, Sam W would probably try to pull off some variety of dewy eyed speech, “I’ve been where you are, I know how it feels to be hopeless, this isn’t the answer, you can make peace, you don’t have to keep doing unethical science” etc etc.

It wouldn’t work, of course. He and c!Dream don’t have the history. It would just make him angry.

#spn #prison trio #I made myself sad

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angelsdean · 1 year

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nah dude i did read it all! very interesting tbh, thanks for indulging me. and taking the time lol. i do slightly disagree with a couple of points but i think that's mostly because i DO sort of view dean as a... i don't wanna say bad person, but definitely not good. and tbh i like him for that. i will say: i do think dean became the angry man in the house, because it definitely wasn't sam or cas; but i think there's a lot of nuance to it too, because for me becoming and being haunted overlap so much for dean specifically.

i do think dean was at least trying to be better, but i think we all sort of agree his journey def got cut short. not to mention i think it's hard to analyze dean as character (and john by proxy) because of the sheer layers spn has; ie is john abusive because of him or because of god; is dean like that because it's inherent (used loosely) or because of god, etc etc etc. not to mention these guys are NOT real people so we can't exactly put real standards on them - plus, they're so far removed from the fictional society as well since they're hunters. just a lot of things go into it tbh. like would dean still be the same if they weren't hunters? is john inherently violent or prone to using that kind of discipline against his sons? (the song remains the same says no, but i still wonder...) is anger inherent to dean or was it all circumstantial?

and i do agree that sometimes people ARE needlesly harsh, but sometimes stuff is just true and. as a deanlover. hes my GUY. i will say that i do think he crosses over into abusive behavior a lot, especially in the later seasons.

about the jack/children comment; i agree that they're isolated, but to me that's still... johncore if you will. and dean is very patient with children, i will give him that.

john&dean nuance is all very kind of complicated and i don't like john much either, believe me, but... dean was still threatening jack and pointing guns at him. to me, at least, that is the same as john and the canonical-not-canonical abuse implications. obviously there are differences, but i think of it like this: even if most of the bad things dean does are mirrors of john, i think the good parts are also mirrors of him. because like you said: john was not a flat character. and he loved those boys. he did very very wrong by them, but he loved them. maybe it didn't count for much in the end, but i think it did.

overall, i think I'm just the type of person to not like woobifying my fav characters (which is completely me, no hate to those who do) so i kinda get the ick when people erase and or defend dean's bad/abusive actions, because ultimately that's a big part of him, yknow?

(there's also the sam&dean dynamic which i havent seen you post a lot about, but in regards to sam and how dean treats him, espcially in the laters seasons... well, i won't bore you with all my thoughts about that can of worms cause then this ask would never end.)

thanks for answering, and making it so long lol. i love reading people's thoughts and i hope you read all this, too.

hi again! sorry i'm about to go to bed so i might not address everything here, but i think it's okay if we disagree on some things and interpret things differently.

i wrote a little bit more abt dean + john here and where i think they parallel and diverge.

i guess for me it's just that i don't think a lot of dean's actions, even the "wrong" ones make him a bad person. i think people can act imperfect and irrationally sometimes, especially in high stress situations, and then later regret and feel remorse for them. and i think dean is suffering through a lot himself and deserves a little grace, compassion, and forgiveness.

i also don't like when characters are woobified. which is why i also am not a fan of people acting like sam (and sometimes cas) are the perpetual victims to dean, as if they also do not make questionable choices and actions that have consequences. or also can just, disregard or fight against dean's actions too. they are not powerless or weak.

lastly i'd say, i don't think dean HAS to be the angry man in the house. you say you think he became the angry man because you don't think it was sam or cas but i guess i'd ask, why do any of them have to be the angry man in the house? why does there have to be one out of the three of them? for me, the angry man IS always john, even when he's no longer there. especially when he's no longer there. he's a ghost and he's in both dean and sam. (early seasons sam was very hotheaded and prone to anger too and paralleled john a lot). i think yes, being haunted by john can overlap with acting like john, but acting like john, reverting back to internalized habits is, at it's core to me, the manifestation of that haunting. that is john. and dean has to fight against that ghost. but anyway, for me, dean can never really become john, and therefore the angry man, because the angry man isn't someone you become. the term has morphed in this fandom but when i use it and talk about it it's in its original context, where it's literally the father figure. first the you grow up with him. then you are haunted by him when he's gone, still feel his presence. and then the cycle continues by inviting another man like him into your home. so in that context, dean (and sam) is the child who grew up w/ the angry man. and the child in the quote is a woman, so there is no becoming the angry man for her. i think, even still, regardless of gender, it's...idk maybe a little cruel? to say that a child that grew up with an angry man in their home is somehow destined to become that same man. that's not what the original quote meant and i don't think it's the framework we should have when thinking about dean and his complex relationship with john and his traumatic childhood.

(also just thinking abt the question of if dean would be the same + angry if they weren't hunters and while we can only take it w/ a grain of salt the show does show us two scenarios of dean not being a hunter: dean smith and djinn dream dean. and both times he seems pretty normal, well adjusted, if not a little sad and lonely)

i think the chuck stuff does complicate things and pose more questions but if we believe that chuck really does like to watch his favorite show rather than micromanage (set up the obstacle course and let them run it as cas framed it), then it's possible not everything was a chuck play-by-play. also i have to say, i personally think all of the young!john stuff we see in spn was massively angel-manipulated. (angels love their illusions and simulations after all). john felt just a little too polished and goody-two-shoes for me in those flashbacks.

anyways, this once again got long, sorry. but i think we might just have to disagree abt some of these things. which is okay!! but i definitely don't think dean is perfect or has never done anything wrong. i just love him despite those things. and when i look at his whole situation + all his past trauma it's very hard for me to blame him or be angry with him for his actions because like, dude is struggling so hard. he needs everything to stop, needs a minute to breathe, and then needs a ton of therapy and maybe some vitamin d and 8 hours of sleep lol

#replies #dean studies #mymeta #long post

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antigonewinchester · 11 months

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15x08 Nice that the writers rectonned the Cage/Hell time so Adam & Michael were only there for 10 years. Makes Sam and Dean a little less terrible.

DEAN: Adam, I want you to know we are sorry. What happened to you… You're a good man. You didn't deserve that. ADAM: Since when do we get what we deserve? Good luck.

Again, foreshadowing for the ending, Rowena stopping demon deals so people end up “where they belong,” Dean (and Sam) getting the Heaven they “deserve,” and all that.

15x09 Another ep I’ve seen and don’t particularly like :) Again, it’s Berens’s characterization of Dean and how he resolves the emotional conflicts, blurgh.

I’ve mentioned before how similar Dean’s speech about being angry in this ep is like Sam’s speech about being angry in 5x11, esp how in an earlier draft of 15x09, the writing had Dean talk about blaming people unfairly, even more similarly to 5x11. And I just don’t buy Berens’s characterization of Dean as “always” angry, because Dean hasn’t always been angry in the way he gets characterized as in later seasons. Dean talking about how he “[gets] so angry” and “can’t stop it” sounds directly like something that could’ve been said during the Mark of Cain arc, you know? And Berens (plus other writers) then kept that characterization of Dean thru the rest of the show, and it’s just... frustrating. No character development for Dean, he gets to be the angry resentful guy with or without taking on the evil murder curse.

CAS: Well, this place will bring that out in you. Guilt. It was my fault the Leviathan got out. It was my fault we were here the first time. I carry that guilt every day. DEAN: I know you're sorry, Cas. About Bel, about Mom. CAS: I was talking about Jack. I already apologized to you. You just refused to hear it. DEAN: Sorry I brought it up. Maybe if you didn't just up and leave us. CAS: You didn't give me a choice. You couldn't forgive me. And you couldn't move on. You were too angry. I left, but you didn't stop me. ... DEAN: No, no, no. [Dean looks around and then speaks quietly in prayer] Cas? Cas, I hope you can hear me... that wherever you are, it's not too late. I should've stopped you. You're my best friend, but I just let you go. 'Cause it was easier than admitting I was wrong. [Dean breaks down, sniffles, and then kneels at the base of the tree] I – Ohh. I don't know why I get so angry. I just know – I know that it's – i-it's just always been there. And when things go bad, it just – it comes out. And I can't -- I can't stop it. No matter how – [Sniffles] how bad I want to, I just can't stop it. And – And I – I forgive you. Of course I forgive you. I'm sorry it took me so long – [Sniffles] I'm sorry it took me till now to say it. Cas, I'm – I'm so sorry. Man, I hope you can hear me. I hope you can hear me. [Sniffling] Okay.

It feels like Berens’s treats Dean’s resentments as significant because it unfairly hurts whomever he’s mad at, so the right thing for Dean to do is to let go of his hurt feelings to make everything better, for the sake of his relationships, for the sake of other people... This framing almost paints Dean’s anger as something he’s doing punish or hurt Cas, instead of Dean himself feeling hurt and not wanting to be around him. It’s a striking similar (and dysfunctional) notion to Bobby’s speech from 4x22 about how family is supposed to hurt, so get over it already. Cas feels guilty, and he apologized, so Dean should forgive him and he’s a dick for not doing so. But Cas could have stayed with Dean even if Dean didn’t forgive him. I think Cas leaving was the right call, but Dean didn’t make him leave, Cas chose to do that, and so him framing it as Dean being too angry/unforgiving/giving him the cold shoulder is shifting the responsibility/agency for Cas’s choices onto Dean. (Thinking of fandom, it’s kind of funny for Cas to criticize Dean for not stopping him leaving, because you know people would call Dean a controlling asshole if he had tried to stop Cas from leaving at the end of 15x03! And I’ve already seen people call Dean a controlling jerk for how he actually acts at the end of ep.)

There’s also how Dean’s speech here really sucks because it raises some major red flags - somebody talking about being angry and not being able to “stop it” or not being control of their anger is… not a good sign. Again, I don’t think Berens intended it to be read as harshly as you could read it, but I can see how/why someone could interpret it that way, even if I don’t myself.

On another note, we’ve again got vampires connected to a monstrous family, in the bad ending having Sam & Dean “giving up” on being heroes and becoming killer vampires. The metaphysics of how the writers think about the world becomes clearer, too. The solution isn’t to lock away (or kill) God, but to replace him with someone better, who ends up being Jack. It ends up very, the King is dead, long live the King. I do think people want the show to be a much more revolutionary text that it was ever going to be, and so people wish the ending had gone further, but... the show was never going to fully upend the system. Wasn’t cool enough for that, unfortunately. So Sam and Dean (and Jack) do end up ‘defeating’ Chuck, but I don’t think the show was ever going to end in a world without God or without a Heaven, not at this point.

#spn rewatch #michael #adam #dean & cas #season 15

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zalrb · 1 year

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overall thoughts on heartbreak high? im curious on what you think of the characters, none of them like left an impression on me but i think they were fine, harper was the only one that actively annoyed me. and of course darren CARRIED the show

OK so I've been thinking about this and, like, the good things about it were the actors had the appropriate chemistry with each other -- Amerie and Harper as best friends? Totally believe it. Quinnie and Darren as platonic soulmates? Sold. Quinnie, Darren and Amerie as a fast-forming chosen family? Yes. Dusty charming everyone from Amerie to Harper and some charged moments with Malakai? Pulled it off. Malakai and Amerie? Adorable. Darren and Ca$h? Sold. Quinnie and Sasha? Cute. Which is why I was disappointed how they devolved. Jojo and the dynamics with her students? Yes. I was like, this is the chemistry you need in a cast, no one felt uncomfortable unless they were meant to, I didn't felt inherent distance. Plus the cast was actually racially and culturally diverse, although I do wish we had a Black female teen. Autism representation? Great. Non-binary representation? Great. Ace representation? Great. The way sexuality is treated like a spectrum and not a big deal? Awesome.

I also liked that Darren and Ca$h didn't go the typical route of Ca$h bullying Darren but also being in love with them because Ca$h is working through his shit because that's tired and it's one of the reasons I didn't get invested in Eric and Adam in Sex Education because I already had my fill of that dynamic with Mickey and Ian in Shameless so I was like great, cool.

But when the show tried to go beyond the incest map and delve into deeper issues like Malakai and police brutality or the kidnap/attempted rape of Harper or Harper's father's mental illness, it didn't do any of that justice and it got bizarre. Like, Malakai deserved so much better than how they handled that storyline, Sasha and Missy telling Harper it was fucked up to sleep with Malakai after he was assaulted became about Harper betraying Amerie and somehow got to Harper feeling slut-shamed and I just kept being like OK but how is Malakai not centered in this situation? And then when they try to deal with Malakai's trauma it's pushed to the side and I kept being like so where are your parents exactly? Everyone who saw what happened was angry and indignant and suddenly Malakai is simply the butt of a joke? Amerie's feelings and their relationship somehow becomes the central focus in this storyline? I would just rather not have it, I'm sure there could've been many other ways to fracture Malakai and Amerie's relationship that leads to him having sex with Harper and Dusty.

And even with Harper, like even though what happened to her and what happened to her and Amerie's relationship is the central mystery of the season and we're supposed to see the way that Harper is acting is her trauma from the entire situation, I still don't think it was handled well, I felt like if you're going to do that, it deserves to be a full exploration and not really a central mystery that we figure out in full detail at the end of the season to be like OH that's why Harper is acting this way because Harper does cause emotional damage throughout the season and I don't think the point is to show the ways in which people have been traumatized can spread damage but more like a justification for her behaviour as well as a way to show that we're seeing things mostly from Amerie's perspective and I was like, no we should've seen what happened and seen the unhealthy ways Harper is coping with what happened parallel to each other from Day One. But she really did annoy me throughout the season.

So, I just kept watching it like, these are odd turns and choices that the show is making.

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fantomcomics · 2 years

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What’s Out This Week? 10/12

Anything can happen on Hal-lo-ween It’s better than a vi-de-o Gremlins going to mess up every cas-sette From Lon-don to I-da-ho

Chilling Adventures Of Salem one-shot - Cullen Bunn & Dan Schoening

Salem the Cat has always been known as Sabrina's familiar, but what happens when Sabrina's not around to protect him (or, as is more the case, when he doesn't have to protect her)? This special one-shot explores a different side of Salem's life, one in which he acts as an anti-hero enacting vigilante justice on those who hurt others like him... animals, in a horror story that's equal parts Pet Sematary and Hereditary.

Black & White: Tough Love At The Office GN Vol 1 - Sal Jiang

Sparks (and fists) fly in this violent yuri love story. Shirakawa Junko is an upstanding employee of a high-level bank. Her colleagues all respectfully admire her... except for Kuroda Kayo, a colleague who's transferred to her department. Shirakawa is supposed to train Kuroda, and it does not go well. These women have a bizarre love-hate relationship that results in either violent office attacks or angry lesbian sex. When a sinister conspiracy seems to be afoot at their bank, can these two stop having bruised hate-sex on piles of documents and work together to investigate? This provocative LGBT+ drama is ready to rumble.

Approach #1 (of 5) - Jeremy Haun, Jason A. Hurley & Jesus Hervas

When airport employees Mac and Abigail find themselves snowed in after a blizzard, they witness a terrible plane crash. After pulling a survivor from the wreckage, they realize a terrifying truth: this plane has been missing for 27 years!

The nightmare has only just begun though, as the people trapped in the airport soon find themselves confronted by what this plane actually brought back.... For those with a fear of flying... it's not the sky that deserves dread, but what lies beyond it...

DanDaDan GN Vol 1 - Yukinobu Tatsu

Momo Ayase strikes up an unusual friendship with her school's UFO fanatic, whom she nicknames "Okarun" because he has a name that is not to be said aloud. While Momo strongly believes in spirits, she thinks aliens are nothing but nonsense. Her new friend, however, thinks quite the opposite. To settle matters, the two set out to prove each other wrong-Momo to a UFO hotspot and Okarun to a haunted tunnel! What unfolds next is a beautiful story of young love...and oddly horny aliens and spirits?

Sensory: Life On The Spectrum GN - Bex Ollerton

From artist and curator Bex Ollerton comes an anthology featuring comics from thirty autistic creators about their experiences of living in a world that doesn't always understand or accept them. Sensory: Life on the Spectrum contains illustrated explorations of everything from life pre-diagnosis to tips on how to explain autism to someone who doesn't have it, to suggestions for how to soothe yourself when you're feeling overstimulated. This book depicts these varied experiences with the kind of insight that only those who have lived them can have.

She Love To Cook, & She Loves To Eat GN Vol 1 - Sakaomi Yuzaki

Cooking is how Nomoto de-stresses, but one day, she finds herself making way more than she can eat by herself. And so, she invites her neighbor Kasuga, who also lives alone. What will come out of this impromptu dinner invitation...?

Samurai 2.0 #1 (of 4) - Marcello Bondi & Mauro Gulma

The year is 21XX. World War III has devastated the planet. A foreigner arrives in the city of Neo-Tokyo. His name is Ketsuo, and he is the last remaining graffiti samurai, intent on clashing with the Emperor, who has prohibited any artform and persecutes anyone who dares to create. In the year 2022, a series from Action Lab arrives at Antarctic Press, where we dare to create!

Legacy Of Violence #1 - Cullen Bunn & Andrea Mutti

A Legacy of Violence, by masters of horror Cullen Bunn and Andrea Mutti, with letters by Rus Wooton, follows Dr. Nick Shaw; an honest doctor just trying to help people. But one day, when a patient gets out of control, Nick suddenly begins recalling past memories he had kept hidden away. That's when he decides to join Doctors Without Borders and heads straight for Central America. But his past still comes calling. With a serial killer on the loose in the small town of Disante, Honduras, Nick's flashbacks begin to intensify-and become clearer. Was Nick meant to go to Honduras? Is this all part of the killer's plan? Find out what Nick has been repressing all these years and why.

Hyperventilation GN - Bboung Bbang Kkyu

Myongi and Sunho haven't seen each other since they were 18 years old. Now 27, they run into one another at a high school reunion, and the romantic feelings they had for one another come rushing to the surface. But are they the same people now that they were back then?

Hitomi #1 (of 5) - H.S. Tak, Isabella Mazzanti & Valentina Napolitano

In Feudal Era Japan, a drifter with no prospects begins training in secret under Yasuke, a once-famous, displaced, disgraced warrior, as she struggles to find her place in a society entrenched in discrimination and violence.

Combining the historical sweep and elegance of Kurosawa with the visceral action of Tarantino, this saga follows the trials and tribulations of a young female warrior who travels the countryside unendingly as she works to gain the rank of Samurai-a title no man, monster, or myth can give to her, but one that she will have to take for herself.

Slumber TP Vol 1 - Tyler Burton Smith, Vanessa Cardinali, Simon Robins & Becky Cloonan

We all have nightmares. What if you could pay somebody to enter your dreams and shoot that nightmare in the goddamn face? That's where Stetson comes in. She's a nightmare hunter. A dream detective. She enters her clients' dreams through a door, investigates their dreamscapes, and kills their nightmares. But Stetson's past comes back to haunt her as she tracks down a nightmare serial killer responsible for the mysterious death of her daughter.

SHWD GN Vol 1 - sono.N

A slick and action-packed yuri tale about two special agent women fighting supernatural horrors! The year is 20XX. Tough but idealistic Koga has just joined the Tokyo branch of SHWD, the Special Hazardous Waste Disposal unit responsible for eradicating mysterious biological weapons that were left behind after the great war. Her mentor is Sawada, a woman with a powerful psyche who complements Koga's physical prowess. Something is sizzling between the two of them, and it's more than just a shared mission. Together, these two badass women must team up to confront horrors beyond their wildest nightmares.

The Sword Of Hyperborea HC - Mike Mignola, Rob Williams & Laurence Campbell

From the ancient warrior Gall Dennar, to Sir Edward Grey, to the B.P.R.D.'s Agent Howards, the iconic Hyperborean sword from the world of Hellboy has landed in many influential hands. And this has been no accident. Trace the sword's path through the adventures and encounters that finally brought it to Ragna Rok, at the end of the world, and witness the sword's journey through history.

Whatcha scooping up this week, Fantomites?

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samshine99 · 2 years

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So this might be kinda bad but alas. i’ve written a new fanfic and decided for it to debut on tumblr.

Love of My Life

Dean never thought he would make it to heaven. He always thought he was going to hell, like it was his destiny. Now that he has made it, it was weird. He had always hoped that someday he would be in heaven with Sam and Cas.

Cas, how Dean missed the angel. He wished he could go back in time and tell the angel he felt the same. That he loved him and no matter what his father had taught him, this love wasn’t wrong. How could it be wrong when it was the thing that kept him going?

——————

Dean needed a purpose. He needed it like he needed a stiff drink after a bad hunt. He had begged Jack to send him back, but with no success. Jack always said it wasn’t his purpose any more, Earth wasn’t his to protect and save anymore. He hated that, he saw Earth as his to protect, like he had had to protect Sammy.

——————

“Please, Jack. I need to be down there, doing something. I need to help people,” Dean begged the kid. (No matter what Jack ruled, he would always be a kid to Dean).

“I guess there is something you could do. But I don’t know if you would be up for it,” Jack said.

“Yes! I’ll do anything.”

“I could make you an angel. There is only one thing you would have to do”

“Please, I’ll do anything. As long as it means I get to help people.”

“Alright, your trial is that you have to face your most heartbreaking loss.” And with that, Jack sent Dean into his own mind.

Dean thought it would be the first time he saw Sam die. He was not expecting to see that room. The room that Cas died in.

____________

“It blocked her grip on you,” Cas said, turning back to Dean, as if this was the night was really happening.

Billie pounded her fist against the door. It shuddered. The warding crackled, but held. The slow pounding continued periodically throughout Castiel and Dean's conversation.

“Dean, she said that wound was killing her. Maybe we can wait her out,” Cas said.

“Yeah, and if we can't?”

“Then we fight.”

“We'll lose.” He walked slowly towards the back of the room. He knew what he had said so many times. He had replayed it many times and said a million different times. And now that he had a chance to change it, he was worried that he wouldn't. “I just led us into another trap, all because I couldn't hurt Chuck. Because I was angry and because I just needed something to kill, and because that's all I know how to do.”

Cas approached the hunter, “Dean…”

“It was Chuck all along. We shouldn't have left Sam and Jack. We should be there with them right now.” Dean started tearing up. “Everybody's gonna die, Cas. Everybody. I can't stop it.” Dean was now walking towards the angel. “She's gonna get through that door,” Dean carried on as if Cas hadn't said his name so sweet it made him want to fall to his knees.

“I know.”

“And she's gonna kill you, and then she's gonna kill me.” Dean hated how easy the words came to him.

Cas and Dean exchange a look. Cas agreed, this situation is hopeless, but he couldn’t bring himself to say it.

“I'm sorry,” Dean said. And he meant it. He was sorry for not telling Cas how he felt in Cas’s last moments, he was sorry for throwing Cas out of the bunker all those times, he was sorry for how he treated Cas. The angel deserved better

“Wait, there is... There's one thing she's afraid of. There's one thing strong enough to stop her,” Cas realized. “When Jack was dying, I made a deal to save him.”

“You what?” Dean had never hated anything more than he hated the empty.

“The price was my life. When I experienced a moment of true happiness, The Empty would be summoned, and it would take me forever.”

“Why are you telling me this now?” Dean knew though, he knew all too well.

Cas started tearing up. “I always wondered, ever since I took that burden, that curse, I wondered what it could be? What my true happiness could even look like. I never found an answer because the one thing I want... It's something I know I can't have. But I think I know... I think I know now. Happiness isn't in the having, it's in just being. It's just saying it.”

“What are you talking about, man?” Dean hated how that word sounded.

“I know. I know how you see yourself, Dean. You see yourself the same way our enemies see you. You're destructive, and you're angry, and you're broken. You're "daddy's blunt instrument." And you think that hate and anger, that's... That's what drives you, that's who you are. It's not. And everyone who knows you see it. Everything you have ever done, the good and the bad, you have done for love. You raised your little brother for love. You fought for this whole world for love. That is who you are. You're the most caring man on Earth. You are the most selfless, loving human being I will ever know.” Cas smiled now, through the tears You know, ever since we met, ever since I pulled you out of Hell... Knowing you has changed me. Because you cared, I cared. I cared about you. I cared about Sam, I cared about Jack... I cared about the whole world because of you.” He let out a sad laugh at this “You changed me, Dean.”

“Why does this sound like a goodbye?”

“Because it is.”

Dean inhaled, ready to say what he wanted, but Cas was already forming the words that Dean grew to love.

“I love you.”

This was where Dean was supposed to tell Cas not to do this. Dean was supposed to bottle up the love and keep it to himself.

There's a wet noise from behind Dean and he turns to see black goo from The Empty squeezing through the bricks in the bunker's wall as a portal begins to open. They both know what this means. There are tears in Dean's eyes as he turns back to Castiel. Castiel is still smiling tearfully. The warded door busts open. Billie stands behind it with her scythe. There's no more time.

“Cas…”

Castiel put his hand, bloodied from when he'd cut it for the warding, on Dean's shoulder.

“Goodbye, Dean.”

“I love you Cas. I always have.”

Cas tried to shove Dean aside. Dean hung on though. He pushed himself against Cas and kissed the angel like he was going to lose him. Billie entered the room, right as the empty was coming out. Cas turned them so Dean wasn’t at risk of being taken but was still kissing Cas.

The empty wrapped itself around Cas and then Billie. It slowly enveloped both of them. Dean didn’t stop holding Cas though. He stayed in that same position until Cas and Billie were long gone. He looked over at the door and out of the corner of his eye, he saw the bloody hand print from when Cas had tried to shove him. He once had been afraid of the mark, now he was proud of it.

Jack didn’t make Dean wait much longer. He brought the hunter out of his mind and back into the throne room.

“How are you feeling?” the young God asked him.

“Good, I-I changed something so I feel better about it.”

“Good. You’re ready now. Do you want to wait or…”

“NO! I mean, I want to do it now.”

Jack laughed at his father’s eagerness. He put two fingers on Dean’s head and let some of his power flow to him. Dean felt stronger and something started to grow.

When Jack stopped and stepped away, Dean let his new wings and grace show. His eyes glowed a beautiful green, unlike any other angel. Jack smiled, happy that he could help his father.

“You know, there is someone on Earth I think I want to send you to. I think you two could help each other quite a bit. How do you feel about that?” Jack asked.

“I like that idea, I really like it,” Dean said, excited to already have a mission.

“Alright, just snap your fingers and you’ll appear right on his front door,” Jack said, leaving Dean alone. The new angel snapped his fingers and there he was. He was Jody and Donna’s porch. But it wasn’t theirs. It was someone else’s. He took a deep breath and rang the doorbell.

While he waited, he grew nervous. His mind was running a million miles per hour. He hoped the person liked him.

He was looking down at his feet when the door opened. His eyes slowly raked up the body making mental notes as they went.

Those hands look familiar. That suit, that tie, that-

“Cas?!” Dean couldn’t stop himself, he had to.

“I wondered how long it would take for Jack to send you me,” he said.

“How? I mean, I saw the Empty take you and you never came to Heaven.”

“You would be surprised what can happen to you when your son is God and pissed off the force that was holding you captive.”

Dean laughed at that and pulled Cas into him.

“I love you, Cas. I’m sorry, too,” Dean said.

“I forgive you Dean.”

“May I kiss you, Castiel?”

“Of course.”

Dean kissed him and it felt nothing like kissing a memory. It felt new and full of life. It made them both hopeful for the future.

When they split, Dean rested his forehead on Cas’s forehead.

“Why did you wait?” Dean asked.

“You’re the love of my life, I would wait forever for you.”

Dean smiled and kissed Cas again.

“Cas? You ok out there?” a woman called from the house. Dean froze. Had he just kissed this woman’s husband?

“Yea, you’ll never guess who dropped by,” Cas answered. The steps got louder and closer until the woman came into view.

“Dean? I thought you got ganked on a hunt?” the woman said. Then it hit Dean who this was. It was Jimmy’s daughter Claire. Cas had been living with Claire while he waited for Dean.

“Yea but it pays to have raised God,” he said. Claire nodded.

“Well, now you can take this old man off my hands.” Everyone chuckled. “Well come in so we can catch up and then I’ll let you all go wherever angels go when they want to be alone.”

#destiel #ficlet #fix it fic

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calypsoff3 · 2 years

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Thirteen. Part 2

The look on my dad’ face I know he is upset that he got heckled by some fans, people really love my mom, but they didn’t need to do that to my dad, he didn’t deserve to be heckled that way. They don’t know him or his heart “excuse me, move! I want to see my dad” I pushed by the gang of men, they all crowd around him like get a job, they just move when my dad moves. These grown men looked at us like we shouldn’t be here, squeezing by them and by the time I got to squeeze by my dad has walked off. He is either upset or angry, but he has walked off again. I did a little run to catch up with him “I love you Chris Brown” a little fan said, I stopped running as my dad stopped to take a picture with the child “I love you too boo” the guy took a picture “done?” my dad said and then patted the child’ head before walking “dad, wait for us!” I had to shout, he looked at us and waved us over “come, come. We need to go” he said, finally catching up with him “I know but why are you rushing, are you upset?” I asked him, I don’t want him to be upset, he killed it out there “no, no. Just the time, your mom is going to be mad with you girls. I need to get you home; I will take you both home. I drove here anyways” oh so that is why he was rushing, it was for us, letting out an oh “come, go into the room” he gestured for us to go in “y’all niggas stay out here” my dad said “mom called me twice” I said to Tianna “twice, that third ring ain’t going to be good” he closed the door “call her back, see what she is asking, it’s late too so she will be worried. Just call her” it’s easy to say that when you’re not the one talking to her, I guess I better do it. Tapping on her name, my dad stood there with his hands on his hips just staring “where are you girls?” my mom said, she is right where are we “frozen yoghurt” looking at Tianna, she nodded her head “we have that at home, you have school tomorrow, come home now. Shall I send the SUV? It’s too late for you girls to be out so I will send it” I was quick to decline “I am getting an Uber now mom, it’s ok don’t worry. Sorry” I apologised “I am timing you both” she put the phone down “she is timing us” my dad laughed “then let me just change, I will drop you both off.

My dad dropped us right outside the house, I mean he accessed the gate and parked “you know mom is obsessive, she is looking at the cameras right now. You know that right?” he turned in the front seat “I know” he laughed “but girls” he got his hand out, looking at Tianna. She held his hand and I just put mine atop “I love you both so much, thank you for coming out. It’s made me feel better and I think I just thought I made a mess of everything including my relationship with you kids” shaking my head “watching you look after Imani when she was born, the constant crying. The chasing around us, the lateness of school. You was there for us, and I can’t forget that, no man would do that if they didn’t love us” I smiled “thank you girls” moving my hand back “tomorrow come here, we will be at school. Raihan has his afternoon speech class, so she will have nobody here. You need to see Imani. Don’t forget that, please dad” I am a concerned older sibling “I will, it’s going to be hard, but I will” I hope so “and don’t be upset with people like that, there is people that will hate me for upsetting your mom, I am not upset. Just annoyed and hold your ground with your mom, she will know now but I had to make sure you get home safely too. Now I will hide out like Batman” he laughed "not too much of that dad, you make it hard for us” he is so geeked at that Batman line “nerd” I just did it, I launched myself forward and wrapped my arms around my dad including the seat because that was in the way “awww” my dad said “you’re still stupid though” I added before getting out “that is true” well least he knows we love him.

The way I let Tianna go in first, we sneaked in but that don’t change the fact my mom is waiting for us, she locked her phone as soon as we came in, the home is so quiet. This place is an army camp now, she is so bad “hi mom” Tianna said, she can take this. It was her idea, closing the door behind me and I cringed “the time” she said, “yeah it overran” Tianna looked at me, but she can look away from me right now “it did, what movie was it then?” Tianna put her head down rubbing her forehead and then laughed “erm it was erm, action” oh she is pissing her off even more “that car looked a lot like my ex husbands Tianna, who is that?” Tianna is laughing, but I mean maybe she is being awkward “we went to see dad, he dropped us off. I lied to you so we could leave the house and see him” she admitted to it, this is on her “it wasn’t Rylee, it was me she just you know came with me and I knew you wouldn’t agree to it if we told you” my mom is so unimpressed “so why did you go and see him? What was the purpose, what did you gain from it?” Tianna got this “erm just to say Imani misses him which she does mom” oh she is pissed off “for lying to me, don’t speak to me about going anywhere or anyone’s house. Also you came home late on top of that, you do not lie to me ever again, I do not care. Go to bed the both of you” Tianna huffed out and walked off “and Rylee, I expect better from you” she said to me “because I am the eldest?” she nodded her head “I just didn’t want it, I wanted the truth, but I didn’t want you both to split” my mom is pissed off at the wrong people “what did you want huh? I don’t think you understand Rylee, if your husband did what he did I would want you to not stay with him, just go upstairs please. And you better wake up in the morning” shaking my head, now I can’t do anything like go out the house for this, dad had to drop us off outside the house.

I thought my mom was going to pop a blood vessel when I wouldn’t wake up “holding everyone up!” my mom shouted as I made my way down the steps “well I know” I guess they are all in the SUV that is here “well yeah I know, Rylee ever since you have gone to see that father of yours you’re angry at me” here she goes “I am not angry at you mom, I am just frustrated. You are angry at us all but the person himself! He is hiding away from you, and I get why but you know what I don’t regret a thing, I saw dad whatever. You can’t keep us away from him can you” she is angering me now “hiding away because he knows what he did was fucked up, I trusted him, and he did that. Go! Get out, go to school” now I am going to be hungry “if you do not come home! Straight home I will be causing hell for you girl” mom is so annoying; she needs to relax. I pray dad comes and does something, he needs to see her and take it.

Seeing my daughters yesterday was the best thing, it’s really gave me motivation to see them I guess, I still have a long way of making up to them but for them to come to me, it made me cry. I still feel emotional about it, they came to me, they missed me. It just shows that I was a good dad to them kids, they remember it and I need to do right by them. I am upset that my kids had to see someone be rude to me on stage and that shit doesn’t upset me, it upset me they had to see that, but we move. I am really not looking forward to seeing Robyn, the girls came to me, and I got to do it. They said now would be the best time, she has nothing on so I will give her the surprise, she is going to lose her mind. I know for a fact she is angry and hurt at me and I just need to take it, we haven’t communicated since I said sorry to her, but we do need to talk, the kids are suffering, they are upset because Robyn is taking it out on them, I am scared of her. Locking my car door as I made my way to the house, I have all the pass codes to the house, she hasn’t changed it but she will be after today, she isn’t going to have me just walk in. Imagine she just attacks me, if she hits me then she does, I will accept that too, I deserve it. The front door unlocked, and I pushed the door open, I feel like a thief just doing this, these girls of mine aren’t good people because they are setting me up for this downfall. Closing the door behind me, now I am wondering if she will be upstairs or downstairs, but I got answer hearing Robyn speaking “mommy I want it” Raihan said “you can baby, here” clenching my jaw seeing Robyn “dad” Raihan said, Robyn abruptly stopped and glared up “hey little runner” picking him up “dad!” he hugged me tight, Robyn isn’t saying anything and I for one don’t want to say anything or look at her “what happened to your face?” he has a mark on his face “Junior hit me” I am not shocked with that “put him down and get out, I don’t want to see you” oh she speaks “we need to talk” putting Raihan down “Raihan go upstairs please, Amerie!” Robyn shouted “he is my son too” she acting like I would hurt him “I want you out! I am not joking; I want you out!” she shouted “Amerie, take him upstairs please and don’t come down” Amerie looked at me and quickly looked away “can we talk?” I said “you son of a bitch, I hate you so much. I hate you, I fucking hate you. I don’t want to speak to you!? And do what huh? Ugh! You piece of shit laughed at me, you changed on me. You didn’t want me and couldn’t say it like a man and if you fucking say you love me, don’t! You don’t, I have always loved more then you loved me!” she is shaking, she is so mad with me “I know” I breathed out.

I mean I am not walking out of the home without speaking to her properly “why? Tell me why because if you called I would be there, if you called I would have come there to you, even if it was just sex so to me you fell out of love with me sexually, because I gained weight, clearly it was that. So why couldn’t you just call me and say I need sex” Robyn isn’t inviting me inside, but she is asking me questions “there is no reason, I was having too much fun for you to come. Once you come then it ends” Robyn laughed “wow, I hope it was worth it. Because Chris, these women, these girls. They will never be me; you will never get another me. There for you emotionally, mentally. I didn’t need to be around you for nothing, I don’t need but I love you so yeah” nodding my head knowing that she was there for me “so what happened? I saw the pictures; I don’t want you coming back after this. So tell me, and look me in the eye, don’t worry I won’t cry” I swallowed hard, this is hard “we had the girls and Rita on the-” Robyn clicked her fingers “look me in the eye, look at the woman you was with for fifteen years” clenching my jaw “we had girls on the tour bus, we played drinking games, we was intoxicated, and it came up on that there is a three way kiss, so I did it with Rita and another female, but Rita didn’t just kiss me. It was others she did, just that she was more into wanting me. Then we had another kiss where she did want to take it further, I was drinking, very drunk. I stopped it, I went sleep. Next morning, the girls wanted to use the shower in the room on the bus, they did, I left. Then I went back in my room, they was in their towels, but I never had sex with anyone, I just didn’t think it would get leaked out when people sign NDAs. I was partying with girls every night pretty much, but I didn’t have sex with them, I stopped it because it was you” Robyn stormed towards me with her fist balled up “you!” she shouted and stopped herself before walking away from me, she wanted to hit me, but she didn’t.

I didn’t bother to move from where I am stood because then I am just upsetting her even more “and you want me to just what? Once again I have been publicly shamed by my husband that loves me and I will what? Take him back like a fool I am? Oh my god, you know how much I stuck by you. I just can’t, it’s just not happening. I am not even going to cry; I am just angry. I am the clown, everyone knew you. You proved everyone right, I truly believe you have fallen out of love with me and there will be nothing you say to change that because your behaviour tells me otherwise. You always find other women attractive and here I was just ranting to you about things, and you was there kissing other women, I for one can’t let it go and I won’t. I am angry at me; I am angry that I let you back in my life. I am angry that I thought you would ever change, you would love me for me, I believed you and you know what, I did because I love you. I have lost my best friend; I really can’t forgive you. You have done it” putting my head down “I do love you” I said “no, no. You don’t, you never was that boy I knew in school, I have dealt with so much with you. I am done, I can’t accept it. Go and do what you like because I am done, you did your deed now I have to deal with the after effects of the I told you so. That’s how much of a let down you are” rubbing my chin as I lifted my head up “I am not going to let you go” I admitted “you will let me go, I am not yours” she retorted “I don’t think I can do that, you going to have to fight to the very end, I refuse” I ain’t going to let her “I am single, I think you should accept the divorce and we both can move on. You will be the one suffering Chris, me. I have shut down; no other man will ever have my heart. I probably will have to find a man to please me but that will be for sex, not nice is it” looking away from her “bring another man near my kids I am causing hell” I mean that shit “well this fat bitch has plenty of offers, you will be the one crying Chris, after everything. You will suffer, you can have all the good times with these girls. But they will never love you like I did” placing my hands in my pockets “did” I repeated “a thing of the past, are you done? You can leave, don’t worry my lawyer will serve you, speak to him. He will also offer advice on how not to be a dickhead” staring at Robyn “lawyer up nigga, staring at me for what?” she laughed “I want to see my kids” she can’t keep that away “while you are hiding, I am already getting a temporary order for custody of the kids, so listen here you will get served and you have 30 days of being served. And if you want to play hard, then do it. I will ask the court for a default. This means asking the court to decide the case without your input, so do it” she laughed “I am ready for you” licking my lips nodding my head “I am sorry Robyn” I have actually lost Robyn, staring at her just holding back any emotion, we are just standing staring eye to eye in silence.

#Chrianna #Chrianna FF #Fanfic #Fanfiction #Chrianna Fanfic #Chrianna Fanfiction

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thebiggestmenace · 3 months

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hurray!

we only got half way through this the first time, so we're officially on the new stuff!!

Cas isn't truly dead, right? he comes back at some point

Jack is so goofy

is Chuck the one to bring them back? and does he even bring them all back? cause I don't think Crowley comes back :(

wait, they burn Cas' body??

Asmodeus??

Jack's copying Dean 🤭

Sam is so good with him :(

gonna say it now, Dean is being an ass

are they just gonna kill everyone the boys know?

wait, is this the Empty?

hi, Sam, I love you

there's things in the Empty????

Cas!!!! you're back!!

Billie's not actually dead?? she's Death now?

the fact that Dean's all happy go lucky now that Cas is back?? 🏳️‍🌈

"he's an angry sleeper. like a bear."

Kevin!!

is Rowena still alive??

of course Ketch is back smdh

and Asmodeus has Cas now

Kaia is so pretty

Dean, threatening her is not gonna go well

oh, no, they're in the Twilight world

not Kaia :(((

omg it's that one guy from tlou

THEY DIDNT KILL ROWENA!!! HI ROWENA <3333333

oh, and she's all powerful? 😏

HI DANNEEL YOU ARE SO PRETTY

GABRIEL??? oh, what have they done to you?

is this even the right spell? *

* yeah, I did not think so

ep15 is so fun

the immediate "what" after Daphne said Dean had the ghost by his thigh? I know what you are

and Sam's been taken again

yk I think the only thing Ketch has going for him is that he's the one that freed Gabriel

and of course they're separating again smdh this never ends well

CHARLIE??!!

Sam, don't be mean to him :(

please tell me Sam isn't the one to kill Rowena.

NAOMI???

how do they fix the angel problem?

Gabe is so flirting with Sam oml

WE GOT TO SEE JACKS WINGS????? AND HE WAS PROTECTING MARY??? oh, he is so fucking cool

"and if we die, we'll do that together, too." AND YOU EXPECT ME TO BE NORMAL ABOUT THIS????

and they're all back now? **

** nope, it's a weird ass dream

why does this have the vibes of the walking dead?

I'M SORRY, WHAT JUST HAPPENED

oops thought this was e22

is that our Cas or their Cas? oh, it's theirs

Gabriel, no

wait, I remember the big group at the bunker??? but like nothing else?

somebody give Jack a hug

wait, yeah, how does everybody get back??

Dean deserved that day at the beach with Sam and Cas.

how the hell are they already back??

is Jack gonna kill him?

what the fuck, how is that even allowed

don't you do it, Dean

just use it on Lucifer?

Jack, no

oh, they're fighting in the air now 🤭

please tell me this is the last of Lucifer

oh he looks so dapper now

what a season, holy shit. I have so many thoughts, but I can't articulate any of them. I have fears for the next season cause how exactly are you gonna get Michael out of Dean? we don't have Crowley anymore, so what's the other option? and what about Jack? is he gonna be okay without some grace? is it gonna regenerate like it does for the other angels, or is it a fixed supply? I also fear a lot of people will be dying for ✨️plot✨️ reasons. needless to say, this season was a time and I fear the last 2 (????????) aren't gonna be any better

s1, s2, s3, s4, s5, s6, s7, s8, s9, s10, s11, s12, s13, s14, s15

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tmrrwppl · 1 year

Text

Part 2 || Part 1

Let's just say that Clari did not take well to finding out that Jedikiah Price-- the literal boogeyman of every Tomorrow Person in the Lair, the reason John was fucked up, the reason her brother was shot, the reason Irene was shot, the reason 3 of their own died, the reason she was shot, the reason they were underground in the first place, the closest thing to the human!Satan there could possibly be, etc etc etc-- was her father.

That hairpin trigger on anger is quite notably a Price family trait. (Looking at you, Stephen!)

Now, in the main verse, Clari does not find out until she goes to save proto!John. At this point, Cas is dead (by John's hand), Clari is basically on her own to protect the Lair Dwellers, and Morgan is in the wind with Jedikiah's other child.

So when Jed tells her... She realizes just how alone she is, she realizes Jed is capitalizing on this fact. She had no one left, and is prime for seeking out some sort of familiar bond... Which is why she went after John in the first place, despite him killing Cas... John is her only family she has left other than Morgan (who can't be touched by Jedikiah-- who is not only gone, but tied to this monster with his child-- her half sibling), and she can even forgive John for what he did since he was brainwashed.

Jed spills the beans on her. And she knows it's a manipulation tactic--- and more embarrassingly... It fucking works. Jed is fully aware he deserves every single punch she throws at him, and let's her hit him until John pulls her back.

But Clari is more than angry at Jed. She's angry at everything. Her mother, her (step)father, Jed, herself, the world. It was all so unfair and so unkind and cruel to have happened the way it did. And she's angry at herself for entertaining the mere idea of 'what if my mother had given me to Jedikiah instead of keeping me when she didn't want me.' And it's a what if scenario that begins to eat at her from the inside.

What if. What if. What if.

Things could have been so much different, and maybe even better.

Deep down, Clari is fully aware... she's Jed's other opportunity to be a father. John panned out in a terrible failure, Morgan with baby Roger was in the wind and unwilling to see Jedikiah much... But here she was, she waltzed right in asking for acceptance, and he had given her it. But she knows Jedikiah, able to recognize they both think too similarly. He's banking on her needing that acceptance. Banking on her needing and wanting a family. A family that he has now inserted himself into. And she hates him for it. Because he is right. Especially when, once she found them, he let her in. And he was relatively kind about the whole thing. And actually apologetic for what happened to Cas, as John didn't know. Jed knows Morgan and Clari are best friends, ironic to him since Morgan is her step mother in a sense, Jed knows Clari is one of the only people to genuinely help Morgan-- and maybe it's because there was a connection between the fetus and Clari, recognition of kin, but Jed knows Clari won't chance another child growing up without their father... So, Clari's stuck. Jed knows that. Clari knows that.

So she is hella pissed, helpless, and is fully aware Jed is manipulating her, even if there is a slightly decent intention behind it.

#m: Clari #m: Jed #m: John #technically #and this was a ramble but Clari finding out Jed is her dad in different verses always ends with her trying to punch him #at least she's consistent XD

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torturedpoetemotions · 3 years

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A lot of Destiel blogs I look at hate Dabb, I don't really understand why apparently he made Dean too angry?

Ohhhh nonny, it's absolutely not that he made Dean "too angry." It's that during his era the writers routinely shredded Dean's previously established character and ignored or backtracked his prior development in order to create additional tension and conflict where there didn't really need to be additional tension and conflict. I've also seen many people say, and I agree, that Dabb's era kind of flattens Cas out and doesn't allow him to experience emotions other than "sad martyr" nearly often enough.

Dean being angry is in character. Dean reacting to stress and trauma with anger is in character. Dean masking pain with anger is in character. And to be fair, Dabb era does a pretty good job of calling out Dean's anger as a secondary emotion and/or trauma response. Though they don't ever really deal with it, which is another problem for another day.

What's not in character is that Dean would ever treat any child the way he treats Jack in seasons 13-15. What's not in character is that Dean would ever call someone his child, his family, and then turn around and claim they aren't later.

What's definitely not in character is that Dean would ever give up on any member of his family as a lost cause, no matter what they did or how dangerous they were in the moment, or in general. We've seen this to be true with both Sam and Cas, multiple times. We've seen this with John (while possessed) and Mary (while brainwashed). Hell, we've even seen this with characters Dean only interacts with on screen a handful of times, like Claire and Garth.

An in-character Dean would have fought for another way until they found one or it killed him. An in-character Dean would sooner let Jack kill him than put a gun to Jack's head. Hell, an in-character Dean should've been the one to put a bullet in Chuck, and it should've happened the very first second after Chuck suggested shooting Jack.

It's always been a cornerstone of Dean's character that he does not give up on family. He doesn't put anything before his family, whether that's found family or blood family. Not the mission, not the greater good, not the will of his father or God himself. And yet we're supposed to believe that he's willing to do the "hard, ugly thing" with Jack? No, I'm not buying it.

And as for Cas...Cas should have been furious at Dean for locking Jack in the mal'ak box, a fate so awful Dean himself had nightmares about it before it even happened to him. Cas should have been ready to tear Dean limb from limb for even considering putting a gun to their son's head.

That's his baby. That's his son. And I'm sorry, I know first-hand that there are parents who make excuses for shitty significant others and let their kids suffer the consequences, but I don't buy Cas as one of those people. Do you?

No, we should have gotten Alleyway Ass-kicking 2.0 for that shit, but instead? Cas acts like Dean has any right whatsoever to be angry at him, leaves without even giving Dean a well-deserved piece of his mind, and then comes back and accepts Dean's forgiveness like Dean isn't the one who needed forgiving in that scenario.

And really, it all just boils down to Dabb walking this weird line in seasons 14-15 where he was trying to raise the family drama stakes by giving them a kid that they love who might or might not be evil, but also pulling back hard to just-the-brothers state by having no one in this so-called family actually act like a family should. Because seriously, what parent who loves their child wouldn't go absolutely fucking feral at the suggestion of someone harming them in retaliation for an accident? Much less their other parent who's supposed to love them?

Like...I'd say Dabb and whoever else wrote on seasons 14-15 just doesn't understand parenthood, but I'm not even a fucking parent. I have not a single maternal or paternal bone in my entire body, and even I get it better that these chuckleheads, so it can't be that.

And it's just really frustrating because what does it say about Sam and Dean as people if they can sincerely call someone their child and then even consider killing him? If Dean can actively plan to do it and Sam doesn't do anything but look sad and say but no Dean I don't like this? If Cas can even look at the man who put a gun to his baby's head afterward, much less embrace him, much less die for him, leaving said child in the care of the guy who wanted to kill him and the guy who wasn't trying very hard to stop it? What kind of people are they, if they can do those things? To their own child?

It's character assassination for Dean, Sam, and Cas, and completely treating anyone who's not blood kin to the brothers like they're disposable. So that's probably why most Destiel fans, who tend to care a lot about the whole "family don't end with blood" message in the show, don't like Dabb or his era very much.

#ask box #anonymous #supernatural #andrew dabb physically fight me challenge #dean winchester #sam winchester #castiel #jack kline #dabb era #found family #family don't end with blood

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