#changing gender perceptions

[theluckygirlblog]

What Will It Take for Society to Value Its Daughters?

A woman sits in a doctor’s office, staring at an ultrasound. It’s a girl. And in that moment, she makes a decision—not because of financial struggle, not because of health concerns, but because she believes a daughter is not worth having. This isn’t a distant reality. It happens in countries where gender-based abortion is illegal and in those where it isn’t. It happens in places where women have…

[arcanewebs]

personal take on fem tsukasa

[marggri]

Emilio

[fruit-smoothie]

Let down - Radiohead

[lesbiangiratina]

I won at buying doujinshi today

So cute explodes

[mihai-florescu]

"no binaries" but you still believe there are only the options of being cis or trans...?

[arthropodboy]

Wow people really do be being biphobic in our lords year of 2025... I cannot imagine watching the western world fall to facism (while living in the western world) and still putting time and energy into creating division in the queer community. Like. Your human rights are in major peril. What the fuck are you talking about.

[outlying-hyppocrate]

in line to the bathroom just to cry!!

[rebelontherocks]

it's always a bit surprising when people comment on my fics that they like that i write henry so confident or that they could recognise my writing by the way i write him. obviously there's plenty of ways you can play him. but he comes across to me as a very confident guy. the actions you have no control over alone: he does not take shit laying down and he goes for what he wants. from kcd1 to kcd2 that's always a key component of his personality. not a lot flusters him.

[fromtheseventhhell]

I also find it funny that fandom will only accept Lyanna being her non-conforming, wild self in the context of saying that Arya isn't meant to be pretty; Any other day we get back-to-back posts about how Lyanna is actually super traditionally feminine cause she sniffled at a song once, so she's actually more like Sansa. Instead of constantly speaking on Arya and Lyanna, how about you guys reflect on why your standards of beauty for women are attached to how well they perform feminity within the patriarchy?

[abrahamvanhelsings]

tagged by @zaegreus to make a poll with 5 of my all-time favorite characters and tag 5 people to do the same. thank you !! 💙🐳 this was hard as hell tho there's so many guys im permanently deceased abt lol. i specifically did not add our beloved edward bc i think most of my active followers are terror crew so i want to see who else y'all like

lau tagged half the people i know on this webbed site so uhhh @garlandgerard @tideswept @maedhrus @croziers-compass @wlwoodnymph

[archersgoon]

hello hello hathaway!! i was just wondering what do you think quintana’s singing voice would sound like in the band au? like do you have any artists you think she’d sing in the style of (hello poly styrene?)

hi elyse this is an important question & as such i have been giving it much thought. i also forgot every artist i know and had to frantically go through my files but that's neither here nor there. anyway! i think as you said poly styrene is like, the big influence. like hearing plastic bag aged approx. 14 was a key event. re sound i think perhaps somewhere between amy taylor (honestly i think this one's kind of obligatory. also one must hear the accent) anddd audrey campbell from pleasure venom? & also definitely a touch of, like. jigsaw youth. she does of course growl, but really that goes without saying. on a tangent i think she would like soul glo :)

[non-un-topo]

Very exciting thing happened to me the other day:

Coworker asked me "This is awkward but do you uhh.. do you have.." and I LEAPT into action like "Tampon? Pad? What do you need? What kind?" and I went on a manned mission to hunt down not only a pad, but three different types of tampons. I keep some in the library for this reason and I have been waiting for someone to ask me this dude I feel like I was chosen, hallelujah!

More on this + some thoughts on looking for period products as a transmasc because I think this stuff is interesting:

This was originally in the tags, but I feel like talking a lot. I love being the guy in the group with "secret knowledge" lol. In the most normal way possible, it actually makes me feel special that my female coworkers feel comfortable talking to me about periods. Maybe it's because they see me as partially female, but I honestly don't get that impression from them. They actually talk to me as if I'm a cis guy, which is still as interesting as it is weird, for lack of better words. I got misgendered by a dude in front of this coworker, and she gave me such a sad and sorry look. They like me ;_;;;

In order to find a tampon, which is what she asked for, not a pad, I had to ask around the building where I knew they gave away free stuff. The interesting thing is that, in the process of trying to pass as a cis man, or at least not out myself, I felt like I had to falsify ignorance about period products when I was asking if anyone had one. So I automatically did that thing that all cis guys do in lingerie shops, which is, "Um, my friend needs a pad? Tampon?" and afterwards, I was so worried they would think that I was lying about finding one for a friend and I was just too embarrassed to admit that I needed one for myself, therefore they somehow knew I was AFAB. I have no idea what they were thinking in truth, and there's no way for me to know. It doesn't matter. It was just a weird feeling in the moment, and it almost feels gross to automatically pretend that I don't know the difference between a pad or tampon.

Anyway, I ran back to the library and grabbed a couple different things without having to interact with anyone (except for my staff lol) because I brought these products from home for this reason. It feels really good to be needed!! Just some weird gendery thoughts I had.

As of right now, I could never go into a drug store and just buy pads without intense anxiety. It would be like wearing a sign that says I have a pussy and I'm tricking everyone into thinking I'm a man / I'm a dyke or something like that. But at the same time, I have to be better than this. Who am I if not an advocate for the prospect that cis men can be better, can be feminists. So I can't allow myself to fall into the masculinity trap wherein everything "female" is a great, gross unknown. I almost want to complain about how it seems that transmascs have to do all the work of male betterment while cis men don't work so hard asdfghfds.

I might write more about this (changing perceptions of gender / behaving differently to try and be stealth), particularly concerning compliments. I feel so fucking weird complimenting people now. But that's for another time, maybe.

[faerociousbeast]

ok i do need to clear this up but despite clocking into yuri duties i am not a solid girl. i can accept being a liquid girl however

[mcr-themed-brain]

Exactly one person told me to post more let the right on in art and i just got to this part in the book so

[quietwingsinthesky]

If ur OC (Millie?) is a Trans Man, it’s weird to use she/her so much for him. Trans Men are always men

ngl anon, this ask kinda annoyed me at first, but i’ve cooled off, i see what your issue here is, and i’ll try my best to get across where our disconnect is.

okay so 1) This is my OC. Like, before anything else, whatever you think I should be doing with them is irrelevant, because Millie is mine, and I’ll talk about him however I want. Same goes for anyone’s OCs; you cannot police how people talk about their own creations if you want them to keep making things. Even if it’s uncomfortable for you because you don’t understand why they’re doing it a certain way.

1.5) addendum to the above: pronouns are not the be all end all of gender presentation. i understand that maybe it might set off some dysphoria for you, perhaps, to see a trans character referred to with the “wrong” pronouns from what you assume they should be, but like. the best advice i can offer is to let it go. quell that instinct before it convinces you to jump on someone who is just using the pronouns they are comfortable with for themself when you think they should be using something else. trust me, this instinctive reaction can be weaponized against other trans people very easily. learn how to recognize and shut it down so it can’t be. some trans men will use she/her (and not for the reasons i’m about to outline with millie btw, just cause they like it.) you gotta let it go.

2) anyway. millie. why do i use she/her for millie a lot. i mean, the most basic answer is that when i write trans characters, i don’t write about them with a set of Final Pronouns that overrides all the others. i tend to refer to them as they would refer to themself at that point in time, and Millie doesn’t figure out he’s trans or come out until later in his life. When I’m talking about earlier in it, I don’t use pronouns she wouldn’t. It’s a consistency thing and it’s a a personal preference for me when talking about trans characters and about my own history. My pre-transition self is also “she” because that’s what she used for herself, that’s what she knew, and because it doesn’t somehow invalidate my gender as it is to acknowledge how I perceived it once.

I like writing about trans characters pre-transition or with a complicated relationship to transitioning or their gender. it’s very cathartic for me to think about Millie as a trans man (though, honestly? arguable he’d ever use that terminology exactly. hell, he’d probably never call himself trans of his own volition, he’d just say he’s a man and not explain it.) who spent a very long, very important part of her life not aware of that fact. To be so, and to have no room to explore it, and for it to still be true even buried underneath the layers of denial/unawareness/distraction; that’s an important detail for me.

(just like how i enjoy thinking about how millie’s relationship to his gender & to the vulnerability of change would make him prefer not to physically transition if he’d have to let it happen slow. About millie’s neutral-to-positive feelings on his body as it is versus the way this revelation of who he is that seems so obvious to him and isn’t obvious to literally anyone else pisses him off! he’d have weird shit going on for him even if he wasn’t trying to fuck the devil and even if the devil wasn’t part of the impetus for realizing some of this lmao.)

tldr: i talk about millie in the way i do for a reason. i’m not choosing how to refer to him randomly or… transphobically? which i think even if you aren’t intentionally accusing me of doing, you’re trying to tell me you think i might be doing so on accident. when i talk about millie when she uses one set of pronouns, i use the same ones, and when i talk about millie when he’s using another, i use those. and then sometimes i throw in a they just for funsies/ambiguity.

but she’s trans the way that he is on purpose. i did it on purpose. i’m sorry if it makes you uncomfortable. but i did it on purpose. i’m not going to change something i wrote to be more palatable for you, when i made it for me.