#content warnings listed in post

[anomaly-beans]

Crawls out of the document covered in blood.

Hi. I have a short little bit of writing to share. Just a little exercise in thinking more about the past for my au version of Merry included in Friendcorp.

It’s a bit of writing that, in character as another agent, is writing a file up on Merry’s past EGO corrosions.

Warnings for:

-Alcoholism

-Drug usage (fictional and actual)

-Needles (not described, but implied usage)

-Body horror (of course) ie. Multiple limbs, things growing out of skin, plant and fungus related body horror, slime mold and spores, description of shedding skin like a cocoon, etc. Canon typical stuff tbh.

-Temporary character death

———

Herein lies the contents of this document, contents that shall be expunged from the agent’s files from now forward, unless of a sufficient level to access said events.

[Within this document are the multiple corrosion reports on a singular agent, designated number 777, Agent Merry Darthfellow. This agent has been the reason for day resets and full resets on many occasions and should be constantly monitored.]

-Teth level-

Incident I :

Agent Darthfellow at the time of this report was wearing the suit of T-01-54 [Forsaken Murderer].

During a repression event where the agent was instructed to use lethal force on agents under severe panic, the agent began to display erratic behavior.

The captain at the time reported that they found the agent in the East Welfare hallway minutes later after the command had been given kneeling over the dead body of a clerk, quote, “mumbling to themself with their hands clasped almost like in prayer.”

The captain reported hearing the words “forgive me” before noticing the signs of corrosion upon the agent's face.

[Described as “straps of cloth and leather that looked too much like human skin and looked to be growing out of their face, along with metal clasps. Almost like a muzzle over their face. There were similar straps, not the ones on their suit, but other new ones, wrapped all around their body. They were surprisingly easy to incapacitate to bring for corrosion treatments and a memory wipe after reset”]

Note that in the agent’s file, there are psychiatric notes describing the death of their brother and the immense guilt they feel over his death. It is not believed that they were the cause, but the psychiatrist speculates that they heavily put the blame on themself in their head.

-HE level-

Incident II :

In similar speculation to the incident above, it is believed that this corrosion also stemmed from the death of their brother as being the root emotional causation of said incident.

The agent was being investigated for strange behaviors (ie. Visiting the same abnormality, T-01-68 [Funeral of the Dead Butterflies], as their EGO suit without logging their hours or being assigned to work on the abnormality) and was put in for a mental corruption screening.

The agent put in charge of said screening reportedly did not instruct them to change out of their EGO.

In reports afterwards, it was written that the agent had begun to double over in pain during the portion of the screening regarding past trauma (particularly the questions about witnessing death during childhood).

[Quote: “An arm ripped out from their chest. It looked to have clawed out from under their skin. (Later notes make a comparison to the process of a butterfly emerging from a cocoon). It was like they, no. It. Was crawling out of their skin. Its face was crawling, like multiple butterflies were trying to make up a face. Eye spots where eyes should be. And the thing was wearing an old, worn down funeral tuxedo, covered in dirt and worms. Just like the actual abnormality, it had an extra arm sprouting from the chest, but it also had crumpled up looking useless butterfly wings. Like they hadn’t formed right in the cocoon.”

Reportedly the agent then quickly incapacitated the corroded agent 777 through multiple shots of a white damage weapon.

Incident III :

Agent 777 was currently in possession of both the EGO weapon and suit of O-02-98 [Porccubus]. This is only one of several incidents involving agent 777 and said abnormality. It is possible that restrictions will have to be put in place to keep further problems from arising.

[Written incident report, fully quoted: Agent Darthfellow was reported by an agent 780 of Safety as being found, quote, “high off their ass on enkephalin, multiple pain medicines stored in Safety (of both pill and syringe variety) and drinking from a bottle of whiskey when found.” The agent was reportedly “rooted to the spot” in literal terms, as vines grew out of their arms and had embedded into the floor. They were covered in leaves, vines and thorns, and agent 780 reports that they were cackling endlessly. Red petals were starting to grow from their face upon 780’s arrival to the scene, and were trying to cover 777’s face as 780 worked on trying to unroot the agent and then incapacitate them. Workers had to wear thick gardening gloves when moving the body of 777, for fear of pricking themselves on the thorns.]

-Waw level-

Incident IV :

O-01-73 [The rest of this report has been completely redacted at request of the disciplinary team sephirah]

Incident V :

Agent 777 was reported at the time as wearing the EGO suit and gift of O-04-66 [The Little Prince] during the incident.

[Said agent was reported from security footage as working in a lab at the time of the incident. They had been working for over seven hours at that point, and another agent entered the lab, seemingly angering agent 777. As the other agent entering the room doesn’t remember [memory expunged] the words they said, it’s unclear what 777 was furious about. Security footage shows them throwing a beaker of liquid to the ground after yelling for quite some time and then convulsing on the spot, staggering over to the floor as blue puffball mushrooms similar to the EGO grew all over their skin. Their mouth opened seemingly to scream, but all that came out was stalks of mushrooms that erupted into spores upon hitting the air. The other agent is reported as having ran after the spores hit the air and locked the room down for a contaminant in the air. Further security footage shows multiple black eyes opening up on the puffballs, all oozing a thick black liquid in a look similar to crying. Agent 777 was recorded as writing down something on a personal notebook [confiscated and redacted fully] before collapsing and “melting into a mass of slime mold which further contaminated the air”]

No further corrosions have been reported as of writing this document. Agent 777, Merry Darthfellow, is to be monitored and put under strict orders to keep from causing further issues. Any further incidents involving agent 777 should be reported to captains of necessary teams, or any of the sephirot.

[The name of the writer of this report has been redacted]

[leupagus]

Gotta say I find the college-aged kids whose profiles read "MINORS DNI!!!" adorable. Babycakes I know it's exciting being at the grown-up table now, but those were your classmates five minutes ago. Maybe calm down.

[manga-and-stuff]

One funny side effect of having a somewhat sizable blog that posts in the art tag is that I get to see all the latest tumblr scams aimed at artists. And the fact that I don't actually post any original art in that tag, only makes those scams that much more obvious.

Newest example:

I get these kind of comments all the time, and they're always from some brand new blog that has like 5 posts tops. Juuuust enough to look legit at a glance.

I never engaged any further with these kind of replies, but I am guessing the end goal here is to get your banking information or your [insert money sending app name here] login or something like that.

[detroit-become-moomin]

Hey there! Completely forgot to post about this here, but - charity project for trans kids!!

POINTY THINGS, a folk horror collection written by me, illustrated by @ehlihr, and edited by @nimagine is now available for purchase online through Pride 2024. All revenue raised during the upcoming year will go to LGBT+ mutual aid orgs defending trans youth! In this collection you'll find:

55 pages & 22k+ words of story

unsettling megafauna

a trans take on red riding hood

fun facts about 16th-century beheading practices!

deeply unsexy vampirism

haunting-as-dysphoria

3/5 stories brought to life in spooky, atmospheric detail by elisar's illustrations!

The charities we'll be donating proceeds to include Equality Texas and the Transgender Education Network, but I'm also keeping an eye out for other mutual aid orgs defending the rights of trans youth in the American Southwest.

🩸PURCHASE HERE (GUMROAD) 🩸

🩸 OR HERE (KO-FI)🩸

[blimbo-buddy]

”This story contains upsetting topics that may be uncomfortable to some” do you have the slightest idea how little that narrows it down

[pinkbunnieskill]

hi

this is my vent account ig!! [CHECK TW BELOW ♡]

i'm 20 and i go by they/them pronouns

i am 100% PRO-recovery and do not encourage any type of self damaging behaviors. it's just something that i am struggling with

i'm just gonna rant now and then about pretty much anything that's going on in my life so-

uuuuuuh yea i guess that's it

I AM WAY COOLER IRL I PROMISE! /j

→ tw for: sh, su1cidal ideation, ed(?), sa, sexual topics, substances(?), mental health in general, gore, mention of nsfw stuff, medications, derealization, depersonalization, graphic stuff(?)

minors dni pls

[ayara-resara]

.

[blametheeditor]

“What are you?”

Scott freezes at the question. The same one he’s heard countless of times in different stories. One’s that all ended the same way no matter who told it.

And with how the voice sounded like thunder, there’s no denying he’s been found. By a human.

The young borrower doesn’t even look behind him. Instead he desperately tries to pull his arm out of the knot his thread made around it. Shrieks in terror and pain when it only makes it tighten around his wrist more. But he can’t think of anything else to do, he has to get away he’s been seen the human is gong to kill him!

“Ooh, that ain’t pretty.”

The human sounds a lot closer, and just to prove it, the ground suddenly jumps.

Scott can’t help himself. He sends a look over his shoulder. Doesn’t dare breathe when he comes face to face with a shoe. A massive one. With strings he could use for rope that would be better than the thread he uses to climb. At least those are thick enough they won’t wrap around his arm and make it feel like it’ll be cut off at any moment.

But he could never take those strings. He’ll never get the chance to. Because any moment now and the shoe is going to crush him.

Panic has Scott yanking his arm again, yelling in pain when his thread only tightens more. And now it’s bright red, and his hand is going numb.

“Alright, just calm down little guy,” the human thunders. “Keep pullin’ like that and you’re gonna lose your arm.”

Terror keeps the borrower frozen, not wanting to upset the towering being who could easily complete such a threat. Or finally stomp on him to get it over with. And he doesn’t want either to happen.

The only problem is that he gave the human the perfect chance to grab him, fingers curling around him before he realized what was happening. By the time he does, he’s pinned down to easily stop his squirming.

Scott chokes on a sob as thumb taller than him nudges his thread, a hum shaking him to the bones.

“Damn, you really tangled this up, huh?” the human muses. “Don’t worry, I’ll getchya free in no time.”

And the moment he’s free, Scott won’t even get the chance to run.

[familyabolisher]

oh this is gonna be so good

[chirxlity]

SATSUKI KIRYUIN

CW: KLK spoilers, mention of: compulsory heterosexuality, physical & emotional violence, s-xual trauma, CSA, SA, r-pe (for the sake of better background and context about this anime & about Satsuki story)

About her character and why she is stone femme headcanon for me.

SATSUKI

This character does not have this cold, strong but sharp and fierce appearance as a random addition of traits just for the sake of fanservice. Her physical appearance and her personality traits are polished and calculated, yet she is pretty vulnerable on the inside and has a huge and rich inner world. She is acutely smart, a powerful strategist, a good and strong leader with the kindest heart I've ever seen in a character apparently so cold, stubborn or even despotic. But we have to keep in mind her upbringing and that she did what she had to do in order to survive because her main goal was to save the world and protect her closest friends. She wanted to free them as well as she wanted to free herself. But... from what?

SATSUKI'S PLOT

about her plans, goals and what Ryuko meant to her

Satsuki had such important goals: she wanted to free humanity (and herself) from the biofibers and the tyranny of her own mother, who was working with them to subjugate all the people on Earth, but she also craved to avenge her father and sister for what Ragyo did to them, so she fought for revenge but also for love. In the end, all that she wanted was to protect the ones she loved the most. 

Satsuki believed she could lead a revolution against Ragyo and the biofibers by using the power she had as her daughter against her. She took advantage of that power and the fear it inflicted on everyone to build a hierarchical system based on The Law of the Strongest and blind obedience (basically she militarised the school), and then she started to ‘colonise’ other schools to gather an army. She did this to trick her mother into thinking that she was working for her because her empire was much larger and stronger, so she had to be very cautious or else the chances to defeat Ragyo and the biofibers would be even lesser. All of these factors led her to repress her thoughts, feelings and emotions.

But when she met Ryuko, her plans started to change a bit: she saw a lot of potential in Ryuko and wanted her to get stronger and surpass her from the very beginning. She felt that Ryuko was something more, not just another soldier that could help her defeat Ragyo once and for all, and she wasn't wrong about it: later on they found out that Ryuko was that little sister Satsuki and Ragyo thought dead and that Isshin Matoi was actually Soichiro. He raised Ryuko and hid her from Ragyo with the hope that, one day, she would defeat her and the biofibers.

When these facts were revealed, Satsuki knew everything changed: she could trust someone of her own blood, she could finally have her dream family: one that she'd have built, one that she'd have chosen, one that would have truly and deeply loved her for who she is.

NONON

Now we have to talk about Nonon, Satuski’s best friend and (implicitly) lover, the only person who knew her best and could fully trust: this character can come across as an irritating or pedantic girl, but that’s just the surface; she acts tough the only way she knows just because she wants to show that she’s strong and the most important person in Satsuki’s life. I find it so heartwarming that even though the rest of the Elite Four are respectful and loyal towards Satsuki, it is Nonon that better understands her boundaries, and they treat each other as equals. Nonon is not just another subordinate to Satsuki (and never was). I think that because of this and her appearance (small, cute, etc) she wants her value as a fearsome opponent to be acknowledged, and that's why she acts so sassily and arrogantly (a thing which I personally love about her).

Nonon always finds the courage to fight and never gives up whenever Satsuki is near her; she feels the need to protect her, and she is always willing to carry all the weight if that means Satsuki will be safe and sound. 

She is the one who always took care of Satsuki’s deepest wounds but also her dreams, and is the only one who knows best the pain Satsuki had to endure in order to save everyone. Both of them shared their dreams and hopes with each other when they were kids, and since then Nonon took care of hers as well as Satsuki took care of Nonon’s. 

JUNKETSU

It is hard to talk about Junketsu and what it felt like his relationship with Satsuki and Ryuko to me right after talking about Nonon, but it has to be done if I want to illustrate why I headcanon Satsuki as a stone femme. 

Junketsu is, first and foremost, an allegory for compulsory heterosexuality. He was the symbol of the chastity/virginity forced upon the future bride and spouse, Satsuki (we have to remember it was Soichiro the one who told this to her, that Junketsu was going to be her wedding dress). So it was the underlying expectative of defeating Ragyo by sacrificing her will to Junketsu that her father put on her shoulders, one of the reasons that kept her from loving Nonon freely, openly and wholeheartedly, maybe the main one because Ragyo simply wanted the whole subjugation of her daughter, her complete devotion to the biofibers cause, while Junketsu was just a tool for both her father and mother that would force Satsuki to do the will of one or the other.

But even though Junketsu was just a tool, Satsuki had to wear it on all the time, which means that Satsuki was living constant situations of rape; after all, whenever Satsuki dressed Junketsu and tried to activate him, she endured a lot of pain and ended up very weakened from resisting Junketsu taking full control. And the thing here is, although Satsuki willingly wore Junketsu, that doesn’t mean she had another option. As I said, this suit was made to control her and Ragyo used it later to control Ryuko too. He, as the symbolic husband, tried to tie them up to heterosexuality at some point in their lives. 

So as we can see, Satsuki didn’t want to wear any biofiber cloth, she had to use them and let herself be used by them in order to save the whole world and set everyone free.

CONCLUSIONS

I think it is well pictured that Satsuki truly cares about people but felt she couldn’t trust them because of how the world was built by her mother and the biofibers, and also how Ragyo treated her with so much despite at the same time she emotionally and sexually abused her (it’s so obvious that Ragyo is a child abuser and a paedophile). But Ryuko was key to help her understand that things could be different, that she didn’t have to make everyone afraid of her in order to get what she wanted, that she actually could trust people. 

So for all that has been explained in this post is why I think Satsuki embodies so perfectly what it’s like to be a stone femme for me and not just for her appearance, but for her choices too. She had to carry so much weight on her shoulders but Nonon and the rest of her friends supported her without putting more pressure on her; they just took care of what Satsuki ordered them to do. 

I also find so relatable the way she copes with all the trauma she’s got from facing lots of sexual violence, and physical and emotional abuse, or the fact that a close relative (her own mother) made her believe she was a failure and a good for nothing, that she didn’t belong and would never be enough for her. She didn’t lose her kindness and her hopes and dreams even though she had to turn herself more tough, it just happened that she showed her soft side differently. She actually cares, she is the one who provides and she sacrifices lots of things to protect humanity’s freedom. And she finally learns to trust in the good potential of all humans, and to let the women she loves take care of her too. 

To conclude, Satsuki was key to make me come to terms with me being a stone femme because I can see lots of subtle details in how she moves, behaves, thinks and approaches things that -somehow-remind me of myself, although I know we are not on the same league. But I really think she might be a stone femme too because she is a woman with strong and rigid boundaries around every aspect of her life, and she defends and makes everyone respect them. In the whole anime I’ve never seen anybody try to question her and her boundaries, and I truly admire her a lot for this.

[chunkofchange]

list of stickfigures:

sketches

the line of action

skeletons

emojis and symbols

tropes

concepts

[monadocyclone]

think i'll look up how to do neocities stuff and make my main site a useful links directory for my personal reference and to share with friends

[dearqueerdeers]

Hey so uhh i posted a fic

https://archiveofourown.org/works/54801628

it’s going to hurt by 100GoodStoriesForever

(1451 words), Chapters: 1/1

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Relevant Tags: POV Nile Freeman, Nile Freeman-centric, Nile Freeman Needs a Hug, Nile Freeman Whump, Blood and Injury, nile learns as a kid that pain cant be loved away, and nile in the present day is loved through it, Hurt/Comfort, but admittedly a little heavier on the hurt than on the comfort. sorry

Summary: When Nile was five, she fell off her bike. … This was decidedly more severe than falling off her bike. One minute she was sprinting away from a building they’d found out seconds too late was a decoy; the next, an ear-shattering shockwave knocked her off her feet, and she fell. She thought she heard someone call her name, then a searing pain ripped through her stomach.

[honeydots]

i utilize filtering all the time it's my favorite function im kissing it for being a working feature, but god i wish you didn't have to scroll thru all your filtered tags to add to your filtered content list

[vulturevanity]

Tumblr weeb who only ever watches shonen: "they will never make an action-packed anime with heavy homoerotic undertones but with female protagonists and rivals--"

Kill la Kill.

"-- without sexualising the women--"

Alright, my bad. Pretty Cure.

"-- and without the frilly soft glittery shit prevalent in shoujo."

Okay then, picky asshole. Shoujo Kageki Revue Starlight be upon ye.

[dracula-enthusiast]

Saw you were interested in watching Utena! I finished it recently. Really good. please Read the content warnings online.

i for sure will!! thank u for the heads up :)