#crappy reviews

[ducktracy]

sharing a very sage bit of advice from The Simpsons' own John Swartzwelder that i've been trying to hamper down in my writing and drawing alike. let your inner crappy little elf do his worst

[shinyzango]

So, about that "A Steampunk Carol" graphic novel...

I totally did not forget to make the post about it like I promised I am so sorry.

For those who are not familiar with it, long story short a while ago I came across a Kickstarter project for what seemed to be a steampunk adaptation of the Nutcracker story and was bummed that I missed out on it and wasn't able to support and secure a copy for myself, but a fella made me aware that it did actually get published in Italy a few years ago, and that it was sold on Amazon. And after discovering that there was literally only one copy left, I bought it on a whim to both read it and to hopefully attract more attention to it for reasons I'll discuss in just a bit.

I'm just going to say that I'm very back at writing reviews so apologies if this doesn't say anything at the end or if you didn't get the answers to your questions dkfjgn

Alright, now for the book itself.

First things first, the story. I won't go into details right now as I do not want to spoil folks in case this does get released in english to a wider public, but I can add a Spoilers section in the future where I explain in detail what happens if I get asked about it.

The story, like I said, is an adaptation of the Nutcracker And The Mouse King, but it is quite different in many elements, and spices things up quite a bit, especially after the introduction.

Sadly it feels quite rushed in its execution imo, I assume it's because they had to fit everything in a single volume. Which is a shame because there are many concepts and ideas that are very fascinating and interesting, both for the plot and for the characters themselves.

Speaking of the characters, they are quite unique and interesting.

The main kid, Caitlin, who is the Clara/Marie of the story, can be a little sassy, but she still feels grounded and has a good balance between putting down her foot and being nervous about the situation. I don't mind her character.

The Nutcracker, who is only called Schiaccia (just a shortened "Schiaccianoci" which is nutcracker in italian. I assume he's called Cracker in english if they kept that logic), feels solid. He's a loyal soldier, skilled but does show hints of insecurities. A good lad.

The mice are great as well, I'm really intrigued by the lore they cooked up for them, and the Mouse King is actually not bad, and I like what they did with his character.

There's also another supporting character, a tin soldier who goes by Sergeant Idle. He is basically a companion to the Nutcracker. He is basically a plot tool, helping with the backstory and moving the story forward, but not in a bad way. He's very enjoyable.

I would have loved to see them all explored further, but like I said it all feels rushed probably because it had to stick all in a single volume. I don't know if the authors ever considered this to become a series or if it's just a one-shot story, but I would honestly love to see this evolve into a series, if only because I love the characters and I would love to know more about the lore they cooked up for it more in detail, letting all the elements have the time to shine.

Moving on to the graphic...

I love Lorenza's art style. It looks very sketchy, with a clean roughness to it if that makes sense. And I really like all the designs of the characters.

(Apologies for the glares, I tried my hardest to limit them as much as possible. also ngl I'm giggling a little seeing how Schiaccia looks similar to my Hans skdfkjhn)

All in all, I really like this adaptation. It's unique and enjoyable, if only a little rushed.

Like I mentioned before, this was Kickstarted a while ago to get properly published in english. It was successfully funded and as far as I know, they're currently in the process of printing copies if not even shipping them for the backers. I still don't know if the folks at Last Ember Press are planning in making it available to purchase outsite the Kickstart, but I really hope so because I do think this deserves to be available to everyone.

[nomattertheoceans]

Now that I finished reading the Percy Jackson books (well, at least up to The Last Olympian anyway), it's finally time for me to watch all the rage reviews that trash on the movie adaptation and honestly I have been waiting to do that for years lmaoooooo

[shmothman]

im so done with this fucking manuscript 😭😭

[slothinginorbit]

I liked dr romantic but I had a hard time connecting with the younger leads. I never really liked them, one is too arrogant and the other is rage personified. I didn't feel any chemistry between them too.

So when I heard s2 had different younger leads I was interested. I am so glad I gave it a chance because s2 was much better. I loved the new characters, the chemistry was great, the music was so much better.

Seo woo jin's character was much more compelling and deep, his trauma, him trying to survive but still trying to follow a decent path. I honestly loved him from the first minute.

Cha eun jae was very likable but the dozing off part was a bit off putting to me. But her heart was in the right place and she was open to learning and correcting her mistakes. Which is huge btw.

Yoon Areum was such a sunshine among all the drama. And I loved how they gave her a romance arc rather than making her a comic relief. She was sweet, considerate but also a bit too nosy.

And lastly the bone doctor, bae moon jung. He lived in his own world and seemed like one of the most chill person to ever worked in doldam. He does find himself entangeld with the lives of the new recruits (thanks to kim sabu) which results in a sweet bromance.

I have liked the core staff in doldam in S1, and in S2 it carried further, they came together like a family. And I love how they are shown as extremely skilled (due to them working with high number of trauma cases). No one is clumsy or incompetent and the mistakes felt very human very real.

All in all I liked s1 but I really loved s2. Now I am watching s3 and I am enjoying it as well.

[totheecore]

well eye for once am glad i did not listen to gr reviews because i enjoyed this read a great deal like it hadn't happened in a while

[vampiredungeon]

That post about goodreads reviewers not being human was right. What the fuck is this man

[prrcyjacksons]

Hi Bell!! So,, from what I've seen, you've read King of battle and blood. Can you tell me how you liked it? I want to read it but the low rating of the second book makes me hesitate 😬

Mer hihihi!!

I finished it earlier today and it's ...okay ig. I'll be blunt - it's 80% p*rn and 20% (very predictable) plot😂

Apart from the main couple getting handsy almost immediately and a very sloppy ending, the rest was an entertaining one-time read. I too won't be picking up the second book because a) The reviews, b) Adrian(the male lead) is blone canonically but in my heart he is a brown-haired man c) The world/fantasy setting didn't awaken any kind of curiosity in me and a lot of things that were Supposed to be obvious were just bleak and vague(like their powers and how everything worked) and I'm not looking to read a whole other book to again end up with the same vague shit.

Is it worth the read? Maybe not. But hey if you like some hot vampire bite-bite shenanigans, go for it.

[mechahero]

//okay but who’s going to be the group of terrible people menaced by a slasher villain in the form of lambda?

[babylion]

[amorgansgal]

I posted 2,908 times in 2022

411 posts created (14%)

2,497 posts reblogged (86%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@gitli

@f--hawk

@aslutforarthurmorgan

@the-neigh-sayer

@foundynnel

I tagged 2,440 of my posts in 2022

Only 16% of my posts had no tags

#arthur morgan - 1,210 posts

#john marston - 477 posts

#rdr2 - 442 posts

#rdr2 fanart - 440 posts

#red dead redemption 2 - 390 posts

#abigail marston - 160 posts

#charles smith - 154 posts

#dutch van der linde - 134 posts

#rdr - 122 posts

#red dead redemption - 119 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#the way his grey shirt sleeves were rolled up and eventually you gazed into his eyes. you inhaled deeply and felt his thumb run over your k

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Hiya! I adore your writings! I wanted to ask how would the boys confess to their crush?

Aww, thank you! :D I have done Arthur, Sean and Micah for this ask, I hope that's ok. Hope you enjoy! It's mostly all SFW, though Micah is... Micah.

It's Just a Little Crush!

Arthur Morgan

You’ll be lucky if you ever find out!

The man will first repress any feelings he has for you, chalking things up to just being impressed with your skills and appreciating the work you do around camp. He doesn’t ACTUALLY have feelings for you, he just thinks you’re a pretty good person to have around.

But truth be told, he finds himself making excuses to stay in camp when you’re there or riding out with you on jobs. He’s something of a worry wort and keeps an eye on you, then feels bad for looming over you like a hawk!

When he has to stay away from camp he thinks fondly about your smile and laugh, and how much you make him smile and laugh. He misses the sound of your voice, the way you affectionately pat his arm and feed his horse peppermints when you think Arthur isn’t watching.

Really, it’s only when he’s away from you that he realises how he’s fond of you and debates for an eternity about telling you how he feels.

If he’s unable to move pass how he feels, then he might tell you, but it could be a year or more until he actually does reveal all!

If he does, he’s very earnest, but also terrified that you might reject him. He’ll nervously glance up at your face, trying to guess what you’re thinking and feeling.

‘Ain’t goin’ to lie anymore, darlin’, I’ve grown sweet on ya. Have felt that way for a while. I know I ain’t a good man, don’ deserve ya, but I do… like yer quite a bit.’

Sean MacGuire

See the full post

302 notes - Posted August 12, 2022

#4

So I have an request

I need in my life sort of grumpy/ sunshine and enemies to lovers trope!

Of course Arthur being grumpy and Reader teasing and annoying him for fun!

Might be with smut, with angry Arthur showing reader that her teasing must come to an end. 😏 tho I really need how their relationship would develop 🙏🙏

Hello, I hope this is ok :) I've only done a bit of fluff and a short hc. I'm going to pace myself with smut writing, so this is just the beginning of the relationship. Hope you enjoy!

When Arthur meets you for the first time he’s not in the best of moods. He had slept poorly the night before, hadn’t eaten well all day, been pissed off by Micah and because he got back late, he didn’t even get a decent serving of stew - just the burnt bit at the bottom.

So safe to say he’s a grumpy boy who isn’t interested in entertaining folk and plans to just sulk rest on his cot.

But he’s grabbed by Mary-Beth and Tilly who insist he has to meet the new gang member.

Arthur grumbles mightily, but is eventually forced over to where you were chatting with Sean. He immediately notices your big grin and eyes sparkling with mirth. He does his best to ignore the swooping sensation in his chest, when he hears you laugh.

Mary-Beth introduces you both and you offer him a hand to shake. Arthur scowls and gives it a half-hearted shake, more to hide the fact he is immediately intrigued by you than actual contempt or dislike.

‘Let me guess, they keep you around for your sense of humour and winning smile?’ you tease.

Sean cackles, Arthur scowls further and stomps off to his cot. He does his best to write in his journal and focuses on the previous events of the day, but he can’t help his eyes drifting over to you and writing just a very small paragraph.

‘If they’re making Sean and Uncle laugh like that, then I fear we have collected another fool for their entertainment, rather than someone who could be useful!’ he writes. He does feel a bit bad about it come the morning, but the writing remains in his journal.

Annoyingly, over the next few weeks you prove yourself beyond useful. You’re a quick, accurate shot, a keen thief with light fingers and, more importantly to Arthur, an excellent horse rider who cares for their horse a good deal.

Not that he gives you a lot of praise. Arthur scolds and dismisses your work, not wanting you to get cocky or arrogant. The fact that you don’t even let his barbs and comments bother you irritates him more.

You’re constantly making jokes and quips at his expense, though he’s fortunate the rest of the gang never seem to be around when you do.

‘You know, if you keep frowning like that the wind might change and then you’ll be stuck- Ah, I think it might be too late actually!’

‘Beans, beans and more beans isn’t actually the full three course meal you seem to think it is!’

‘You can laugh at my jokes, you know. It’s probably causing you great internal harm to not do so!’

‘Tell a funny one then and I’ll think about it!’

‘Uncle’s ass?’

‘That ain’t a joke.’

‘Yeah, it’s a crime against humanity!’

He actually manages a snort of laughter after that.

‘But seriously, why are you always so grumpy? Whatever did I do?’ You flutter your eyelashes at him in a pretence of innocence and Arthur ignores the little flip his stomach does.

‘You waste everyone’s time with yer nattering and jokes and nonsense!’

‘Oh, but Arthur, nattering and jokes and nonsense are all I have! You can’t take it away from me.’

‘Get enough of it from Sean, don’ need more of tha’!’

‘I think you enjoy it really!’ a teasing smirk on your face.

See the full post

311 notes - Posted May 25, 2022

#3

Happy Birthday, Mr Morgan

As requested by @mrs-morgan-13 here's my 'Arthur receives a birthday gift and is flattered because generally his birthday goes unnoticed and you both have a crush on each other, but because you're both as dumb as rocks neither of you realise it' fic :D

Hope you enjoy!

Warnings: None, tis all fluff.

It was a warm day in the Lemoyne countryside, but then that wasn’t exactly a surprise. The last week had been a mad rush of moving from Horseshoe Overlook to a spot that was close to Rhodes and near Flat Iron Lake. You were relieved about that, glad that the occasional cool breeze would drift lazily across the still water and provide some relief from the midday heat.

You couldn’t exactly blame anyone else for forgetting, especially because since Blackwater you had all been trying to get by and salvage what you could. The last few days of setting up camp, hunting, fishing and repairing tools, clothes and wagons had filled everyone’s time. There wasn’t much money or inclination for anyone to celebrate birthdays. Though Jack would remind anyone who listened that his was on 15th January, just in case it had been forgotten!

Most birthdays went unremarked, perhaps some drinks and songs in the evening, but you hadn’t gone out for a proper celebration for anyone’s birthday in a long time. Gifts, cards and cake wasn’t considered a necessity that the Van Der Linde gang should waste precious funds on. You understood the reasoning why, but when you scored $40 last week, you decided to buy a gift for a gang member whose birthday was coming up soon.

Arthur wouldn’t expect anything for his birthday, but you knew how hard he worked. How busy he was and how much he gave to the gang. Hell, even that day he had left camp early to go out on a job. So you were left waiting by the large oak tree that dominated the centre of camp, hoping he would return. Knowing your luck, he wouldn’t even come back tonight and would camp out somewhere for a week!

You hoped he would like your gift. It was quite difficult to know what to get the man. A horse would’ve been the best gift, but that was certainly something out of your budget! In any case, Arthur preferred to capture and tame the horse himself. It was how he got you your beautiful Blue Roan Nokota that you called Misty. You adored her with all your heart and so it felt right to at least thank him properly with a birthday gift.

You heard heavy footsteps coming towards you and looked up to finally see the man himself, returning back to camp. Arthur was heading towards his own wagon and gave you a two fingered wave as he walked by. You quickly got to your feet and followed him. Hopefully, you could speak to him before anyone else did and dragged him off on another job!

‘Hi, Arthur!’ you called out and smiled as he turned around.

‘Hello,’ he replied, tossing his hat down on the nearby table. He gave you a warm smile, then looked at you with some suspicion in his gaze. ‘Can I help yer?’

‘No, well… I’ve got something for you.’

He looked a little confused by the notion. ‘Why?’

You smiled at him gently. ‘It’s your birthday, Arthur. You remember? You told me it was 30th June.’

He was unbuckling his gun belt and looked up frowning. You watched his lips moved as though he was working out what day you were on and then sudden realisation appeared on his face. You couldn’t help the giggle that slipped out at his raised brows and slightly opened mouth.

‘So it is!’ He let out a sigh. ‘Hardly feels like it has been a year.’

You nodded. ‘Yes, so happy birthday, Arthur.’

He chuckled at that and put the gun belt away in the chest by his bed. ‘Thank you.’

You pulled out his present from your pocket. You had wrapped it in some old newspaper you had found and tied it up with one of your ribbons. A dark blue one that you no longer wore but kept for sentimental reasons. You extended the gift towards him and he finally looked down at it.

‘Oh, you didn’ have to do tha’.’ He pushed the gift back towards you.

‘But I did,’ You extended it to him again. ‘And it’s useful. It’s a useful, practical, boring gift like you.’ Arthur smiled slightly and grudgingly placed his hand out for the gift. You passed it to him and felt your cheeks warm on hearing Arthur’s soft rumble of laugh.

‘Yer too stubborn.’

He untied the ribbon and pulled away the paper, revealing the knife you had brought. You bit your lip, trying to hide your smile, as Arthur gave a low whistle of approval. It had certainly cost a little more than you would usually spend, but you wanted to show Arthur that he deserved something nice and that you at least appreciated everything he did.

His fingers carefully traced over the engraved stag on the blue steel blade, then tested the weight of the ebony wood handle. He placed his thumb against the edge of the blade, seeing how sharp it was. You smiled as his focused was drawn to the knife. It looked like your gut had spoken true and Arthur liked his gift.

‘I know you lost the knife you liked in Blackwater, so I thought-’

‘It’s perfect,’ he said, looking up at you. You pressed your lips together with happiness and felt the warm flush on your face once more. His gaze was intensely fixed on yours and you could have quite easily drowned in the blue-green depths. ‘Thank you.’

‘You’re welcome,’ you breathed out.

Arthur pulled out the old knife he had been using from the holster, then replaced it with the new blade. ‘Yer know, heard tale that it was bad luck to give yer sweetheart a knife as a gift.’ He suddenly finished fussing with the knife and looked back up at you nervously. ‘Not that I’m saying yer my sweetheart or tha’ it would be bad luck-!’

‘I know,’ you reassured him, though felt a swirling, nervous feeling in your gut. Perhaps you shouldn’t have wanted to be Arthur Morgan’s sweetheart, but the suggestion buzzed around your head like an excitable gnat.

See the full post

362 notes - Posted January 14, 2022

#2

OH NO! HE'S HOT AND EMOTIONALLY REPRESSED BECAUSE OF HIS TRAGIC BACKGROUND! 😭😭😭🥵🥵🥵

399 notes - Posted September 15, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

1,616 notes - Posted June 19, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[ipwarn]

I posted 2,749 times in 2022

281 posts created (10%)

2,468 posts reblogged (90%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@ipwarn

@na-page

@lucy8675309

@d-criss-news

@adampascalfan

I tagged 2,467 of my posts in 2022

Only 10% of my posts had no tags

#darren - 806 posts

#q - 283 posts

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#kevin mchale - 63 posts

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#snort - 56 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#so if i wake up in a couple of hours (supposing i manage to get back to sleep) to a whole bunch of americans posting about how sad they are

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Jenna Ushkowtiz Our hearts have burst wide open 

22 notes - Posted June 4, 2022

#4

24 notes - Posted June 13, 2022

#3

Matilda The Musical movie clip | "Revolting Children"

44 notes - Posted November 23, 2022

#2

And what does Ushkowitz think about that Glee docuseries that promises to take a look at some of the show's biggest scandals?

"I have nothing good to say so I'm not gonna say anything at all," she said.

48 notes - Posted October 18, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Jenna is having a baby!! So happy for her! 

61 notes - Posted January 27, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[jplupineislost]

Okay so here's a post capturing my experience on Newgrounds, sparked by me looking at stats. I've officially been on there about 4 years as an 18+ monster artist which may or may not factor 🤷‍♂️

Disclaimer that this is my personal experience and not everyone will have the same opinion or experience of this platform as I do.

When I started Newgrounds back in 2020, I was trying to find anywhere that allowed 18+ art that didn't ban everything under the sun that wasn't vanilla. Starting out posting there was fairly simple but tags did take a hot second to figure out how they worked and which ones worked best [or at least better] than others.

I quickly got Scouted and had to google what that even meant- It's when another user who's Scouted basically vouches for you to get your art to show on the main art search page(s); without being Scouted, you are relegated under the 'Undiscovered Artists' filter. Being Scouted is supposed to mean more people see your work, so it's something artists on there try to obtain and keep because, yes, you can lose Scouted status in numerous ways including your Scout losing Scouted status.

I was Scouted, but even then, growth on that platform is horrendous. Being on NG, from what I have observed, you need to either be well connected and networking or posting a lot and frequently. So, I relied on search/tags to be found since I'm a completely new user. Getting views/votes/faves/etc. on NG has been almost impossible for me even with Scouted status.

After 4 years on there and Scouted, do you wanna know how many followers I was able to gain? 18.

Then a few months ago I lost Scouted status. I didn't even notice when it happened because of how dead my activity has been the entire time I've been on there 😂 However, I was able to see that, without Scouted status, views on my art were cut by more than half and take way longer to gain the same number of views as before- which only drives further home how much this Scout system sucks.

So, at this point, I've just been using NG as more of an archive than anything else. Literally every artist I follow on there has stopped posting, so it's likely I'm not the only artist dealing with these problems and they simply stopped putting effort into posting to a platform that gave very little to nothing in return.

To sum it all up, my experience on NG has been like walking through a deserted mall. You can see all the shops and signs of people, but it feels like no one is there except you. Hence why I've been using my NG as an archive instead of wasting anymore effort trying to build a following there.

[brightclaws5tudios]

So I've been writing a story...

Before you ask, "is it good?" well, probably not. I'm on chapter 12 now and don't have much motivation to write, even though I like to do it. I've been editing every chapter of it to:

Change the main character's referred pronouns (now they/them, and if anybody spots an instance where they're called a he it would be appreciated to tell me, although their brother calls them a he and that is on purpose.)

Just make it better. I read a few books recently that were really good (If you want to know, they're "One Night in Hartswood" by Emma Denny and "Hell Followed With Us" by Andrew Joseph White, so if you're looking for good books I'll recommend those to you.) But by reading them I became aware of how, well, crappy my writing was.

Anyway, I've worked very hard on it and I'd appreciate it if a few of you took a look. You don't have to, I won't force you to, but I'm hoping to get a few more readers because then I'd have motivation to write even just for a few people who like it. If you see any issues or plot holes, feel free to let me know. If you read it, I hope you enjoy it.

The link is right here, I'll send you to Chapter 1. https://www.wattpad.com/1318871197-mirror-dreams-not-this-dream-again-chapter-1

Here's the link to my profile, although that story there is the only one on it. https://www.wattpad.com/user/Scar_Brightclaws

[goddamnwebcomics]

Monster Girl Academy: The Second Beatdown (Issues 11-14)

Monster Girl Academy remains the worst webcomic I've ever riffed. I've been holding off from riffing rest of the chapters because I wanted to save them for July 2024, which will be a special flashback month in honour of the 10th Anniversary of this blog.

However, picking the right issues to riff for that period, it's difficult. I've read so many issues of this shit, and all of them are terrible.

So, I originally wanted to riff those issues in old school way of posting the pages one by one to spite Kraw, but I don't think it matters since my blog is niche. So instead, I am going to do an issue by issue beatdown of remaining MGA chapters, and highlight everything that is wrong with them. However, I will still be posting the full pages that, if they were to be riffed normally, would receive Crappiest of Crappy Crap tags, and those pages will carry on this counter.

Let us begin with the Issue I skipped, Issue 11.

Issue 11: Nurse Rapist Returns

Zack is on grocery store, when he spots a child crying in the aisles. The child belongs to Nurse Rapist, who I didn't recognize at first because she looks so different in her civil form. Why does she have a child? Who fucking knows.

And we IMMEDIATELY see the thing that I fucking hate most about MGA. Zack's stupid fucking horny monologue. It's a shame Vincent's mom is a rapist. Maybe one day he will join Dullahan's little sister and flee this cursed city.

We're back to "Everyone's eyes are always wide shut" mode which takes this look way lewdier than it should. We conventiently learn that Nurse Rapist is a single mother and HER LIFE IS HARD.

Also, we're in page 3 and Zack has already fantasized multiple times. And they're just as ridiculous as his inner monologue.

How fucking convenient she said that, then again she is a rapist and probably taking advantage of Zack. I would feel bad for him if he wasn't such a fucking piece of shit.

Anyways, Zack asked Nurse Rapist on a date and this gets him excited.

And we already have the first CoCC page on our hands

Not only are we posting yet another shitty meme, we're also BRUTALLY besmirching the good name of David Bowie, let him rest in peace. Also god, does ANYONE have ANY public decency in this universe?

And we get an implication Nurse Rapist wasn't always a futa. So uh, does this mean the cock was caused by a late blooming? So girls with dicks ARE monsters in this world, good job Kraw. I'll be sure to tell that to my 7 transgirl friends.

Zack gets a latte for Nurse Rapist as he does more of his shitty inner monologue, I swear there's more of it in this chapter than EVER before.

We learn Nurse Rapist is also a researcher for an organization, which is kind of suspicious, and we learn her first name is something I won't remember so I'm gonna keep calling her Nurse Rapist.

Zack then makes Nurse Rapist cry when he suggests doing something about his succubus transformation instead of...having sex?

Something tells me this has happened with every NORMAL woman Zack has known during his life.

Zack then kisses Nurse Rapist and Nurse Rapist gets a boner, if what happened earlier was supposed to be an emotional scene then good god it's even worse than this comic's last attempt at being emotional. Also their date lasted like 1 page.

They go in their apartment and strip and start doing the hey nanny nanny, we also get a Kraw making a random ass reference to Food Wars?

Food Wars for those who don't know is an anime where food is treated like ecchi fanservice. I don't know why this is necessary, Zack mentions drinking ice cold beer in a hot tub with Nurse Rapist, he has mentioned food before. Dude, you sat down to watch Food Wars and forced a reference to it, that's why you did this reference.

Also, no way Zack will EVER drink beer of any kind. Pepsi is probably too intense for this moron.

After that we get this CLASSY line.

So women with penises aren't women? Maybe Kraw locked this comic behind a paywall so he can protect himself from people who rightfully want his head on a plate. Seriously, the day he writes Spinnerette to have trans representation he is fucking doomed.

Even worse than that, Zack's response to that is

Shut the fuck up, seriously.

The hey nanny nanny begins for reals and Nurse's cock is slamming against him, and then arguably the highlight of this arc happens.

Zack licks Nurse Rapist's cock, yes, your boy Zack is now OFFICIALLY homosexual. And in the next issue he fucks Minotaur's brother. If this comic actually had any guts, Zack would have a bisexual harem. Not gonna say it would make this comic any better though.

Also we get this masterpiece, Nurse Rapist officially is the first harem girl in this comic to get her own off-model cumming face. Turning it upside down will not make me not notice it, Kraw

Nurse Rapist then suggests they'd have fun with Zack's succubussy form and they kiss. Blah.

Alright I will start rating these issues from 1 to 5 stars. 1 star means, it was better than expected, 2 stars mean, it was mediocre which is still a stepup from this comic's average quality, 3 stars mean it was average shit, 4 stars mean it was shittier than average shit, and 5 stars means it's the worst issue in MGA history. For this chapter I'm gonna give it

⭐⭐⭐⭐

It would've been 3 stars if it wasn't for the terrible dialogue about Nurse Rapist wanting to feel like a woman and Zack's terrible inner monologues being more frequent than usual. Also Kraw needs to keep David Bowie's name out of his damn mouth.

Issue 13: Zack's Double Date Part 2

This is the first time in MGA history we directly follow from the events of previous issue, as Zack is still in his festival outfit and coming to Cheenotaur's apartment after pleasuring her brother all night. Zack then spots her lifting weights because gyms bro Kraw loves gyms bro that's why he has the build of a fat chipmunk.

Zack thinks Cheenotaur is mad at him for leaving, but she isn't, she is embarrassed for being so sweaty though, but of course Zack's inner monologue tells a different story.

I'm starting to think the reason Zack never says these out loud is because the girls aren't stupid enough to take his fucking simptalk.

Anyways, we see the proud Kraw tradition of Cheenotaur having ridiculous muscles, because she has to exercise or else she gets stressed. Gurl, you don't get muscles like that unless you're bodybuilding 24/7. Kraw thinks routine exercises make you a fucking bodybuilder, apparently.

They go inside to get a shower and we get an update on Cheenotaur's fish, because that was necessary. Fuck it, Dullahan's sister will never appear again, so the fish is the new best character.

Free him.

Turns out Cheenotaur built a fucking JAPANESE BATH HOUSE to his room, completely with a picture of Mount fucking Fuji on the wall, even Zack finds it ridiculous.

And Chee asks Zack to do a backrub and of fucking course this happens.

My god, you're aroused over the back of a woman. What bodypart hasn't Zack complimented yet? Teeth? Ears? Nostrils? Navel? Armpits? Fingernails? Elbows? Rectum?

Oh, hands. Zack also compliments hands. God this comic is godawful

Anyways Chee now rubs the back of Zack and Zack doesn't wanna show his boner because he fears Chee considers him a creep. HAHAAHAHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHHA

I keep forgetting other characters aren't exempted from dogshit dialogue.

She then massages Zack's cock, and then THIS HAPPENS

PFFFFTHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, I guess Zack's eye is pregnant now, who am I kidding, nobody ever gets pregnant in this shit.

So will Zack praise his eye for being so sexy? I mean, he did cum on it. This is funny, I hope that happens to him anytime he does an inner monologue from now on.

PFFFFT THIS GETS EVEN BETTER. Though I think him being shot in the eye with cum is funnier, I think getting sperm in your eye would be painful. And who the fuck is Osha?

Then Chee does a sexy pose and...I have to say she doesn't look THAT bad. I mean, she looks way better without those ridiculous fucking poms and the lipstick. She is still not a fucking minotaur though.

Of course we can't have a sex scene without inner monologue

And then Zack gets crushed by thighs, and we get another amazing visual of Zack's HEADLESS BLOODY CORPSE ON THE GROUND.

If I knew any better I'd say Kraw wrote this chapter to please me, but nah, I only accept permanent deaths.

And then they have back sex. Yes, seriously, fucking BACK SEX.

There are times I feel Kraw is playing too safe, and then he throws this thing into the mix which is so overly specific I don't think anyone but him likes it. And then Zack's dick breaks.

And then we end on this note, I have no clue what this means. I guess Zack died, I wish that was true.

⭐

Yes, this chapter was probably the best chapter in the entire comic thus far. The amount of Zack abuse we got actually made it kind of funny. Maybe this will become a running gag and reading this comic will become easier!

Sadly, next chapter proved me wrong, hard.

Issue 14: Tongue of the Fat Cat

Zack hears that a new coffee shop has opened which is ran by a cat girl.

Haha, everyone knows Worky Zark can't draw furries, or Kraw doesn't allow him to.

Zack is of course excited as once again his inner monologue takes over. He even calls catgirls NE Plus Ultra of catgirls, what the fuck does that mean?

Oh wow, that is an actual statement, not a reference to anything. I don't get Zack's excitement over catgirls, he has banged minotaurs, eldritch horrors, dullahans, centaurs and dickgirls. Catgirls are just girls with EARS AND A TAIL. At least the other girls I mentioned have some specific traits to them.

Zack goes to investigate and oh no, she is fat!

Fat??? FAT??? Godfuckingdamn it Kraw you did it AGAIN. Yeah this page gets another CoCC tag. How the fuck has Kraw forgotten what HYPER is? Or maybe Worky Zark can't draw fat chicks, nah, you know this was 100% asked and detailed and refined by Kraw.

And this doesn't look anything like a cat. It looks more like a fox or squirrel, what with that poofy tail and that weird orange shade that doesn't match any cat aside cartoon ones like Garfield. You're fucking a human female Garfield, Zack. I hope you're proud.

Of course, she is a stranger and she shows her ass to this boy and of course Zack goes nuts.

Her name is "Fatcat", although she ISN'T FUCKING FAT and of course Zack thinks basic self-awareness is sexy.

So Zack is now working for Fat Cat, and they have a little bit of sexual tension which is expected.

And then of course, Fat Cat gets stuck somehow and Zack has to grab her booty so she can shove her. So typical. You know, some of you may think that I am complaining about porn comic having porn comic situations, but this situation is so fucking forced even by porn comic standards. "As a boss, I am ordering to shove my booty!" In any other porn comic instead of her getting stuck she would've just asked Zack to grab her ass because you know she fucking hired Zack despite Zack having no work experience, of course she's gonna fuck him.

You know, like this. Yeah, after Zack gets her out of the frame, she asks for belly rubs. This is not cat behaviour, cats objectively HATE bellyrubs. I know because I have a cat, and giving her a bullyrub is like a death sentence!

She is not fucking fat. Nurse Rapist is a woman, Cheenotaur might be moe, Hua might be modest but she is not fucking fat.

And then of course, Fatcat reveals her massive granny panties which she throws at Zack's face. Maybe it's me but I just don't fucking find panties to be sexy and I don't know why anyone else does.

She is now naked and Zack bangs that Female Human Garfield ass as expected. The End.

⭐⭐⭐

This was the usual MGA trite, we have the fat girl whose boobs and ass are only fat and she finds Zack hot and they bang. That's it. She doesn't look like a cat, I think Kraw just finds female human Garfield hot. I am not going to kinkshame that but least you could do is ask Worky Zark to learn how to draw fat chicks before you call her fat. Oy vey...

Anyways, this was gonna go on for a lot longer but tumblr image limit crashed my plans. I will continue anytime I am in a bad mood.

[earnestlyeccentric]

Fourth Wing (The Empyrean #1)

Author: Rebecca Yarros Rating: 1/5 Twenty-year-old Violet Sorrengail has been working to enter the Scribe Quadrant since forever but is essentially forced into the Riders Quadrant. Spoilers ahead. Continue reading Untitled