#desi kamine

[aurkitnarulaoge]

Things my friend group has said that made me question my life choices:

*imitating Daya bhabhi* "He Ma Majati!!... Bhala kare pitaji..."

"Bhagwan bhi banane ka copyright nahi leta, maa-baap to phir bhi insaan hain."

"Nark me maroge." "Yamraj se flirt kar lenge."

"Titanic kaise dubi thi?... dub dub dubbak dub."

"Haye rama ye kya kya hua kyu— muskaan joothi hai~~"

*to english teacher* "Roz roz kyu chale aate ho ma'am?"

*to our physics teacher* "aye haye chunri teri lageni gulabi sharara"

"Bas college degree mil jaye— phir ek amir bap ki aulad ko dhamkake shaadi kar leni hai maine"

*to class topper* "Tu to bewajah badnam hain, ye physics wali to zyada pakati hain."

*to English teacher* "Principal se taarif dilwaenge to games doge?"

"Bas ek bar MLA ban jana hain." "Kyun?" "Wo lal batti wali gadi ke andar parde kaise lagate hai dekhna tha."

"Drugs ka dhandha karenge. Paison se science degree khareedkar chief minister ban jaege— main Kerela ki tu Tamil Nadu ki." "Ghar se bohot door nhi padega?" "Helicopter helicopter~~"

"Aao kabhi haveli pe."

"Padhai? Wo kya hai?"

"Johnny Johnny?" "Yes papa?" "Doing drugs?" "Yes papa." "Tabhi gender nhi bta pa raha mera baccha..."

"Jaanwar janwar mat kr fir katungi to rona ayega."

"<name> mera bhai hain. Desh ka sipahi hain. Bolo mere saath <insert gaaliyaan>"

"Abe <censor> ki <censor> ki <censor> <censor> ke <censor> <censor> <censor> ke choohe!!! Himmat hain to samne aakr bol!!!"

"Bottle mein daaru bhar kr aate ho kya? Ye kaisi harkatein kar raho ho?" "Dekha? Ishiliye sasti lene ke liye mna kiya tha."

"He bhagwaan hai kaha re tu?"

*to maths teacher* "Bas ek aur baar wo question repeat kar do to bell baj jayegi."

*to bio teacher* "nanna re nanna re nanna re na na re class me mat aana class me mat aana~~"

*in basketball court* *to boys* "half court ki line de hi u-turn le lo aaj hum 3X3 khel rahe hain."

*leaving class to go home* "Itni khgushi... itni khgushi mujhe aaj tak nhi hui— are hamari prem bhai kidhar gayi?"

"HAMARE JAISA BOLO!!! BOLNA SEEKHO!!! BHUKH ANDOLAN KARO!!!"

"Dono taraff pahadon ka vaas hain."

"Chemistry ab nhi hota. Chalo sanyaas lete hain. Sab apna apna katora leke aana."

"Gaaliyon aur song lyrics yaad karne me phd ki hai."

Etc. Etc.

[grumpy-nik]

[RANT ALERT]

I HATE HATE HATE MY COLLEGE ADMINISTRATION OFFICER !!!!

They literally treat to you as if they did you a favor by giving you admission! Like bruh aren't you the same person who was marketing your college (actually begging) to me to get admission here?! I could've easily gotten admission anywhere else with my grades... But fuck my luck and stupidity!

This guy talks to me as if he's paying my fee😃🔪

Like I love my college and other faculties but this one mf-

I never curse irl but oh my god this guy got me wanting a murder registered in my name 👹

His job is literally to help students with their issues but all he does is asking 'Why the hell did you fuck it up at first place?!' for at least a 100 times before making a disgusting face at me and giving some poor solution.

My lord with all due respect fuck u and your solution🥰

Why would someone mess up intentionally if they already know they're gonna face you at the administration office? I'm telling you guys he holds some past life grudge against me😭

[taurusmoon2008]

I thought everything is okay then I saw that my old friends had a reunion like all of them , who once said I am their "Jaan" , who once used to cry when I was away from the school for a few days due to MUNs and competitions and now they forgot me

The 2022 me would faint if I told this to her

Apparently one of them is turning 18 in a few days so they'd be planning over that

I still remember each one of them perhaps i am the one who is easy to forget

[browngurl99]

Wo Aagaya. Dekho. Dekho wo aagaya.

[misssclumsy]

Exams mein mcq nahi MC q aate hain

[hinsaa-paramo-dharma]

Oh no

I just realised he heard bhaiya calling me "duggu" today bus stop mein

[fallingmeteor]

Bestfriend

#30DaysAboutMe #Days10

I prefer calling bestfriend dibanding sahabat. Gatau ya never called my bestie  sahabat. Paling temen deket banget. Padahal sahabat itu cuma satu kata ya. Kenapa gue malah lebih milih 3 kata. 

Kadang temen2 deket gue tuh emang lebih banyak tau cerita gue dibanding Ibuk gue. Tapi yang know me so well ya tetep cuma Ibuk hehe. Selama gue sekolah model pertemanan gue itu bisa dibilang selalu punya peer group. 

Dari gue SD gue punya peer group ber5 cewek semua (Apip, Gita, Desy, Hima, dan Ayas) dan tentu punya nama geng. Its called “The Babies” :) Waktu perpisahan kelas 6 sampe nginep bareng dan malemnya itu nangis-nangis karena gamau pisah wkwk :” Trus karena 2/5 itu di pondok jadi tiap liburan tiba 2 hari sekali ketemuan di rumah salah satu buat main seharian dari pagi sampe sore. Sampe akhirnya liburan terakhir sebelum gue pindah ke Bogor. Nangis nangis juga wkwk. 

SMP di bali juga punya peer group ber 4 (Kanya, Fitri, Cynthia, dan Ayas). Karena duduk bareng, satu tempat les bareng, dan kelas 7, kelas 8 juga bareng. Waktu perpisahan sedih juga ampe nangis wkwk. Dikasih kenang2an sampe mereka. Sedih juga ninggalin Fitri jadi duduk sendirian. Tapi sih katanya kadang suka ada yang nemenin. Trus katanya tiap di absen dan nyebut nama aku semua bakal bilang “Pindah” :’) 

Pindah ke Bogor ternyata bisa punya peer group lagi padahal status gue sebagai anak baru wkwk. Ga butuh waktu lama sih. Gue masuk itu di kelas 8 semester 2, official bergeng ber 5 (Dinan, Mita, Nadhisa, Hana, dan Ayas) itu pas mau kenaikan kelas 9. Faktornya karena kita satu frekuensi sih ditambah gue, dinan, nadhisa, hana sama2 tinggal di DP jadi berangkat pulang selalu bareng, main bareng, dan nonton bareng. Sampe sekarang emang cuma tinggal bertiga Mita, Nadhisa, Ayas. Sampe bisa bikin NAT Photo bertiga :”) 

Masuk SMA di kelas 10 langsung punya peer group wkwk. And its called Kamin (Karin, Ayas, Mia, Nadya). Karena faktor tempat duduk bareng juga. Karin duduk sama Nadya dan gue duduk sama Mia. Tapi kelas 11 kebagi 2 wkwk. Gue sekelas sama Nadya, Karin sekelas sama Mia. Dan ternyata sampe kelas 12 begitu loh :) Jadi masih sama sampe kelas 12, gue duduk sama Nadya, Mia duduk sama Karin.

Di kelas 11 tiba-tiba membentuk peer group baru ber 5 (Rassel, Rifka, Sese, Lida, dan Ayas). Mungkin kumau mengaku dosa disini. Kenapa kelas 12 bisa sekelas lagi karena ku request kelas sama pak Sopan hehe huhu hehe :’) Iya jadi di kelas 12 sekelas lagi sama mereka. Di penghujung kelas 12, beriringan dengan adanya konflik di peer group gue ini tbtb gue punya peer group baru wkwk. Mixed cewek cowok ber 6 (Pipit, Nurendra, Nadya, Tino, Ropiki, dan Ayas). Yang pada saat itu Ayas langsung di cap ninggalin sese lida rifka karena punya peer group baru wkwk. 

Masuk kuliah sebenernya temen2 12 IPA 2 masih suka ngajakin kumpul. Tapi ternyata yang akhirnya selalu rutin kumpul ya cuma Gen Primantoro ini (Satriyo, Sese, Lida, Tino, Afif, Rifka, Rassel, Ulya, Agatis, Fachry, dan Ayas) Jadwal kumpul rutin adalah bukber di rumah Ayas. Sampai terakhir kumpul kemarin camping walopun cuma ber 7/11. 

Di IPB awal emang selalu barengnya sama Mauricia. Sempet kemana2 ber4 sama Cia, Anika, Rafa, Ayas. Tapi karena Rafa beda jurusan jadi pas semester 2 posisi Rafa digantikan sama Amel. Masuk departemen langsung selalu ber4. Sampe akhirnya di tingkat 3 melebur lah 2 peer group dan 2 orang independet menjadi satu jadi anggotanya 11 :) Ayas, Cia, Amel, Anika, Nadya, Arinta, Rahma, Dyah, Hani, Banafe, Dafina. Bersyukur banget punya mereka di masa kuliah gue. 

Wow panjang juga. Jujur emang sekarang udah banyak yang ga utuh dari semua peer group itu. Tapi gue seneng dan bersyukur mereka semua pernah ada di hidup gue. Dan masih suka heran sama diri ini kenapa bisa punya peer group di tiap fase sekolah....

[aurkitnarulaoge]

HE RAM

BHUL GYE THE VALENTINES HAIN

AB SCHOOL ME NIKAMME DOST CHOCLATE MANGEGE

AUR MERI IMPORTED ARABIC DARK CHOCLATE TO KAB KI UNHONE KHATAM KAR DI THI [MAINE CHAKHI TAK NHI THI]

aaye to sahi aaj mu uthake, maine school ki jute utar ke marna nai to naam bdal dena hain

[desitraveler]

Before the Great Pyramids, before Indus Valley, before Machu Pichu, before the Bible, Mahabharata or other holy books, hell even before the pagan forms of religion, about 15,000 years ago at the peak of Ice Age, on a cold windy night a Man and a Wolf decided to form a pact and be friends forever. The wolf has fulfilled his part of the pact, what about us? " Kuttey Main Tera Khoon Pee Jaoonga" " Nahin Basantee in Kutton Kay Samne Mat Nachna " " Main Tumhe Kutte Kee Maut Maroonga" " Kutte, Kamine, Hara...." Really ? All this for Man's best friend, the worst of humans are compared to our best friend? Hey, Bollywood I do not agree with you. Just look at this hunk from #Leh, is he not adorable? Do you think street dogs deserve better? Domesticated dogs are descendants of wolves, they abandoned their wolf pack when we asked them to be our friend and have been with us ever since. Next time somebody is kicking a #Dog, remind them of the pact our forefathers made 15,000 years ago. #FreindsForever > > > PS: I am starting a new feature on desi Traveler blog showcasing images that use #desiTraveler & follow @desiTraveler. All are welcome to participate. Each month my favorite 11 images with the tag will be showcased on the blog. You are welcome to participate and invite your friends too. Looking forward to the images 😃 Over period I am hoping this will replace the desi Travel digest. The cutoff for May shortlist is 25th. (at Leh, India)

[taurusmoon2008]

These songs and the entire radhe Shyam album will forever haunt me and I decided to listen everything together wow

So many memories uff

[adultstories4u]

Aaakhir woh waqt aahi gaya jisska intezaar tha. Vicky ki plan mazedar tha. To hua yeh!!

MLA ki watchman ne raat ko Rathod ko phone karke bataya ke MLA parivaar sameth kisi party mein jaa rahe hein aur sirf secutity wale aur wo maujood hein ghar ke compound mein. Watchman ne kaha ke security walon se ussne baat kar liya hai aur weh sab saath hai usske kyun ke weh log bhi tang aagaye hein uss MLA se. Phir Rathod ne Vicky ko bataya ke wo aur Khan jaa rahe hein MLA ke ghar ko.

Vicky turant apne 5 nakaabposh aadmiyon ke saath police station ke paas pohuncha unn donon ke jaane ke baad. Ek time bomb lagaya baahar se uss cell mein mein jiss mein Judish quaid tha.

Assal mein Khan se baat ho chuki thi ke Jugdish ko uss waqt uss cell se nikaal kar dusri cell mein daal diya jae nahin to woh ghayal ho jaega, aur dusri cell ki chaabhi Khan ne Vicky ko pehle se de diya tha.

To police station ke baahar se uss cell par time bomb lagaya Vicky ne jiss mein har roz Jugdish rehta tha, deewaar phata, ek darwaze jeisi entry hui, ek sub inspector aur ekaat hawaldar the jo hakbakaaate baahar dawde aaye aur baaki ke 5 nakaabposh aadmiyon ne sab ko hands up par rok liya bandook taane hue unn sab par. Pehle se Khan ne Vicky ko bata diya tha ke kitne guards mawjood rahenge police station mein uss waqt. Sirf ek hawaldaar andar reh gaya tha darr ke mare woh baahar nahin nikla, aur Vicky bhi nakaab pehne uss bomb se ki gayi raaste se andar ghussa aur Jugdish ki cell kholkar ussko baahar chalne ko kaha yeh kehte hue, “mujhe aap ke MLA chacha ne bheja hai aap ko yahan se nikaalne ke liye, chaliye jaldi waqt kum hai……” Jo hawaldaar andar tha uss ne sab suna ke MLA ke aadmi aaye the jugdish ko nikaalne police ki hiraasat se! Aur jugdish bahot khush dawdte hue usske saath nikal gaya, aur uss taraf jinn aadmiyon ne baaki ke sub inspector aur halwaldaron ko hands up par roke hue the, unn se sab ne kaha, “hum sab MLA ke aadmi hein unn ke bhatije ko nikaalne aaye hein, aap mein se kissi ne kuch bola to naukri se haath dhona padega sun liya sab ne!!!??” Aur sab jugdish ko gadi mein lekar rawana ho gaye wahan se!!

Udhar Khan aur Rathod bhi kaamyaab hue MLA ke ghar ke andar hathyaar, drugs aur bomb rakhne mein. Rathod aur Khan ke ilawa kissi ne nahin dekha ke unhon ne kahan par weh samaan rakhe! Baad mein to inn ko hi wapas aakar nikaalna tha samaan ko!

Vicky ek 4×4 drive karte hue Jugdish ko apne saath leja raha tha, chehre par nakaab pehne hue. Beech raaste mein uss ne unn 5 aadmiyon ko utaar diya aur cell se phone karke khan se baat kiya ke kaam ho gaya ab woh wapas jaa sakta hai.

Khan jab police station gaya to wahan ke sub inspector aur hawaldaron ne ussko bataya ke MLA ke aadmi ne bomb se raasta banakar apne bhatije ko baahar nikaal le gaye! Khan Rathod ko dekhkar hansste hue kaha, “Chalo bhai ab MLA ko giraftaar karna hai bomb lagaya unhon ne idhar chalo usske ghar ki talaashi lein kia pata usske ghar mein hi bomb mil jaaye, chalo tum log bhi hawaldaron sab chalo ek saath!!” Rathod sar jhukae hue peth daba kar hansste jaa raha tha!! Phir sar uthaakar Khan se kaha, “Sala MLA sochega ke kiss se pala par gaya hai aaj usska hahahahahaha!!!” Aur Khan ne “shhh” kaha Rathod ko aur sab nikle aur chale dobara MLA ke ghar ke taraf! Jate jate Khan ne chief minister ko phone karke bataya ke kia hua aur woh uss MLA ko arrest karne jaa raha hai, chief minister ne kaha, “chhodna mat kutte ko!!”

Uss taraf Vicky chala hi jaa raha tha sheher se door nikal gaya to jugdish ne sawaal kiya, “Hum jaa kahan rahe hein ji?” Vicky ne kaha, sheher se door lejane ka order mila hai tumko jahan police nahin ponhuche……” Aur Jugdish itminaan se baith gaya. Vicky ussi jangal ke taraf jaa raha tha jahan weh dehati log rehte hein. Gadi mein ek bag main 1 crore rupay bhi liya tha ussne wahan ke sardaarni ko dene ke liye. Aur gadi ke dikki mein usske hathyaar bhi the jinn se uss ne baaki ke chaar rapist ko maara tha, ek alag sa revolver bhi tha, lohe wala ghunsssa bhi tha aur woh special lakdi jiss se sabke haddiyan tode the uss ne! Aur drive karte waqt Vicky unn drishton ko phir se yaad karne laga, jiss raat ko Sanjana ki rape hui thi…. Vicky khaas kar unn hisson ko yaad kar raha tha jinn mein jugdish involve tha, Vicky ne yaad kiya keise jab Sanjana suicide karna chahti thi aur unn ke ek dost ne sanjana ko rokne ki koshish kiya tha to jugdish ne keise uss se kaha tha ke sanjana ko khudkhushi karne do, yehi achah hai….. Vicky sab yaad karte karte gadi ko jangal ke ek kone mein roka aur gadi ki dikki ko kholkar haath mein lohe wala ghunssa pehna aur hath mei uss lakdi ko lekar aya aur jugdish ke sar par zor se mara…… Jugdish chohunk gaya aur apne sar par hath dabaaye Vicky ke taraf dekhte hue poocha, “paagal ho gaye ho kia, kyun mara mujhe? Mera chacha tera gaand maar dega!” Vicky ne phir usske collar pakar kar zor se khincha gadi se baahar, itne zor se khincha ke jugdish seedhe zameen par jaa girra! Aur Vicky ne usske jabde par bahot zor se uss ladki se mara ke jabda phat gaya aur woh lahu lohaan hogaya, bhaagne ki nakaam koshish kiya ussne kyun ke bus do kadam age badhtehi phir zameen par girr gaya aur khauff bhare nazron se Vicky ke chehre mein dekhte hue bola,

“Kyun maar rahe ho mujhe kaun ho tum?”

Tab Vicky ne nakaab utara aur bola,

“Teri maut hoon, tere chaar saathiyon ko maar dala to tu keise bach sakta hai tu to unn sabka boss tha? Order diya tha meri masoom behen ko atmahatiya karne ke liye nah yeh le ab tu marr kutte, kamine teri gaand mein iss lakdi ko ghusedne ko mann kar raha hai mera!!”

Aur Vicky ussi pehle wale josh mein aakar andhadhun maarta gaya Jugdish ke shareer ke jo bhi hissa maarne ko mil raha tha, haddiyon ke tutne ki awaaz sunaayi de rahi thi, usske peyr par, ghutnon par, baazu ke haddiyon par chehre par, khopdi par, peeth par, kaandhe par kissi jagah ko bina mare nahin chorra Vicky ne…. Jugdish behosh ho gaya phir bhi Vicky maarta chala jaa raha tha…lagta tha Jugdish mar gaya hai phir bhi Vicky ruk nahin raha tha maarte chala jaa raha tha hanffte hue, enkhon se jharr jharr ensoo beh rahe the aur woh bolta jaa raha tha maarte waqt,

“Meri naazuk, masoom behen marr gayi teri vaja se, uss ko till till marte dekha main ne, usski izat luti tum ne mere enkhon ke saamne, aur tu chahta hai ke tujhe chorr doon, dekh SANJANA, DEKH MAAR DALA MAIN NE SABHI UNN KUTTON KO, AAJ MERA BADLA PURA HUA MERI GUDYA, KUTTE KI MAWT MARA MAIN NE SAB KO EK EK KARKE!! MAIN NE APNA VADA PURA KIYA SANJANA!! MAIN KAMZOR NAHIN HOON BABY, MAIN DARPOK BHI NAHIN HOON, TU KHUSH HAI NAH AB BABY? MAAR DALA MAIN NE SAB KO MAAR DALA MAIN NE!!!”

Aur Vicky bhi zameen par baith gaya Jugdish ke laash ke paas phir bhi revolver nikala aur usske laash mein sabhi goliyan utaar dala….. tab bhi ussko chain nahin mila, usske baad ussne uss lohe wale ghusse se usskA thopda bigaar dala ek ke baad ek ghuNssa maarte hue usske marre hue chehre par…Jugdish ke enkhen baahar nikal aaye, honth latak gaye, baal sameth khopdi ka ek hissa bagal mein latak gaya aur Vicky ghunssa maarta jaaa raha tha……

Kuch der Vicky wahin baitha raha zor se hanffte hue…. Phir ahiste ahiste khada hua aur chal kar apne 4×4 ke paas gaya, ek botal paani nikala gadi se aur piya, phir chehre par paani ko dala, haath munh dhoya aur jangal ke andar 4×4 drive karta gaya sardaarni se milne ke liye…….

Uss taraf Khan ne MLA ko hirasat mein le liya sabhi uss ke ghar se baramat ki gayi samaan ke saath. MLA kuch nahin kar saka. Bilkool hakbaka gaya. Khan TV walon ko saath legaya tha aur MLA ke ghar se mile saamaan sab TV walon ne public ko dikhaaya, hathyaar, bakse bhare golian, drugs sab kuch…MLA ke hathon mein hatkadi pehnaaye Khan ussko khinch kar police station legaye aur apne bhatije ko bhagaane ki aur drugs and weapons ki possession ki jurm mein salaakhon ke piche dala!!

To be continued………………….

The post Faraar (Completed) Update No 34 appeared first on Desi Stories.

https://ift.tt/eA8V8J

[smsquotesworld-blog]

Awesome Funny Love Jokes Collection for Whatsapp

ladke-Ladkiyon k expectation me zyada farak nahi. . Ladke chahte he unki Girlfriend maal ho, . . ladkiyan chahti he unke Boyfriend ke paas bahut maal ho

Girlfriend: jaanu apani ye Diamond Ring mujhe de do. Boyfriend: kyon Honey? GF: main roz ise dekhakar tumhen yaad karungi. BF: yaad to tum mujhe waise bhi karogee. GF: vo kaise? BF: ye sochkar ki boyfriend Diamond Ring maangi thi aur kamine ne nahin di.

Subah ka bheja msgs, Shaam ko Vaapas Apane paas Aae use "Whatsapp Messages" kahate hain.

Pappu's Pure Desi girlfriend- Could we go to MacDonald ? Clever Boyfriend, "First tell Spelling of MacDonald" Girlfriends- Oho then could we go to KFC. BF- Tell full form of KFC. Angry girlfriend said, "Let it, You dog.. have kulcha Channe".

Pyar Ki Hr Gali Gumnaam Q Hai, Judai Aur Maut Ishq Ka Anjam Kyu Hai. Log Dete Hai ise Naam Khuda Ka, To Fir Ye MUNNI itni BADNAAM Kyu Hai................. funny love sms in hindi

love is like a forest where brave tigers are killed by the beautiful eyes of deers...

Ladka: yaar, meri gf ne mere saath break up karke apne naye BF ke saath chipak ke, apni Photo mujhe bheji. Uska Dost- aashchary se..ohh, "phir tumane kya kiya?" Ladka: mainne bhi usake papa ko wo photo Forward kar di. Naitik (moral): thoda alag socho.

Nazar andaaz ker dete hai mujh ko wo kuch aise H.R ke pass perhe ho mere C.V jaise

Aaj Himaat karke 1 Ladki ko propose kiya Chudail boli- "Friendship Day" ki Date nikal gayi hai Aab to Sirf "Rakhi" ke FORM bhere jaa rahe hai...

Girlfriend: aaj se hamaara rishta khatm, ham ek dusare ko saare Gifts vaapas karate hain. Papu: theek hai,Mobile Recharge se shuroo karate hain. GF: jaanu, ab mazaak bhi nahin kar sakti kya?

You can hug it when you're in trouble You can cry on it when you're in pain You can embrace it when you're happy So when you need true love Buy a pillow

SEE MORE LATEST AMAZING SMS

Attitude Captions for Instagram Nepali Birthday SMS Tamil Love SMS Hindi Dialogues Shayari Punjabi Jokes Punjabi Friendship Shayari Funny Punjabi Shayari Punjabi Love Shayari Sad Status in Punjabi Birthday Wishes in Tamil Friendship Quotes in Tamil Bollywood Movie Dialogues Instagram Bio Quotes

Way to impress girl: Respect her, honor her, love her, protect her, care 4 her, obey her, sacrifice 4 her. How to impress a boy? Just smile once ..

Tumne mujhe thukara diya Phir bhi Koi gam nahin, kyonki pagali Ladkiya pataane mein main bhi Hum kuchh kam nahin !!

Sun Baby aaenge teri gali Mein chaahe der kyon na ho jae, karenge mohabbat tujhi se chaahe jail kyon na ho jae !!

Life ka sucessful Moral: "Pyar woh nahin ke hum ek ko kitne saal taq karte hai." "Pyar toh woh hai ke hum ek saal mein kitno se karte hai?"

LuV is an illusion! Its a highly dependency disorder of weak hearted ppl... Ppl wid strong hearts believe in FLIRTING ;-)

Santa: My Gf asked me to show more interest in her family. Banta: So, what did you do? Santa: Now I am flirting with her sister!

Many crushes nd flirts are better than one true love bcoz

monopoly is always damaging, and

competition improves efficiency! Pure economic theory of Love

Fida hu uski chaal pe,Uske bolne ki taal pe, Chahe tamacha lage gaal pe, par Bol deta hu sare jahan se.. Nazar mat daalna meri MAAL pe.

Ladke Ke Samne Aane Ke Baad Hi Kyon Theek Karti Hail...? Faadu Answer... . . . . . Lutere Ko Dekh Kar Hi Dault Ki Hifazat Ka Khayal Aata Hai..

New style of proposing Love I have spent many sleepless nights in your love and I don’t want my son to do the same for your daughter… so lets make them brother and sister.

love is a bird you hold tightly, it dies...... if you hold lightly,it flies........... you hold it nicely,it shits in your hand...... vuhhh........ soo.......... forgot love and better flirt.............

Dosti karo college wali se, pyar karo office wali se, programe karo pados wali se, ankh ladao sali se, love karo dilwali se, aur mar khao ghar wali say

"I LOVE YOU"

Ki Spelling Theek Hain Na ßas Yeh Confirm Karna Tha Log Pata Nahi Kiya Kiya Samajhtey Hain.

propose karne ka ek damjakkas style.. kya ghoor ghoor ke dekhti hai.. mar dale gi kya..?? dil daina haiti dai de.. rakh ke achaar dalegi kya??

How Much Love In Your Heart....? CHOOOOOSE... 100 % ( Call Me) 50 % ( Sms Me ) 25 % ( Only A Ring) 0 % NO Answer)

I want u … To be with me In a nice Restaurent To have candle light dinner…. & to say those sweet three words to U…. “Pay The Bill”

Wife to Husband :-

You don’t Love me at all….

Husband points towards their 2 Children and says – then do u think I’ve downloaded these from Google? Kashmir Ki Vadiyon Mein, Barfilee Hawaon Mein, Neele Gagan Ke Neeche Jheel Ke Kinarey Gehri Soch Mein Baithe Ranjhe Ko Heer Ne Kya Kaha… ? ? ? ? ? ? Stupid!!!!! Hero Matt Bano Sweater Pahan Le…………. Thand Ho Rahi Hai. Happy Winter

Ladke Pagal Ho Jaatey Hain Pyar Me, Baki Kasar Puri Ho Jaati Hai Intezaar Me....... .. .. .. .. .. .. Magar Ye Dard Ladkiya Nahi Samjhti, Wo Toh Panipuri Khati Firti Hain Bazaar Me.. . . Or LADKE Pade Rehte Hain BEER BAR Me.............

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Log kahte hai ke khuda ne aap ko bahut fursat se banaya Simple si baat hai yaar Faltu kaam fursat me hi to kiye jate hai

ladkiyo se dil lagana bhool hai, ladkiyo ke piche jana fizool hai, agar kisi ladki ne aapko kah diya kisi din "I love you" TO samajh lena us din "April Fool" hai

Aap kya jano hum apko kitna yaad karte hai, Harpal aapki faryad karte hai, Roz khat likhte hai Cartoon network ko, Aap ko dikhane ki mang karte hai.

Doctor: Tell ur husband that u r pregnant. Girl: But I am unmarried. Doctor: Then inform ur boyfriend. Girl: I don't have any. Dr: Then tell ur mom that Jesus is coming again..

Lrka apni Girlfriend se: Meri Bachi Meri shonu Meri Gurya Mujh Se Shadi Kro Gi? Bolo Baby Girl: Girlfriend- Mujhe propose Kr raha hai Ya Godh le raha hai......funny love sms to propose girlfriend

Boyfrnd-Main Tumhari Roz- Roz Ki Farmaishon Se Tang Aakar Khudkhushi Kar Raha Hu. Girlfrnd-Achchha 1 White Suit To Dila Do. BY-Q? GL-13v Pe Kya Pehnugi?

Pyaar aur “11:59pm” mein kya phark hai?

Confused ????

Simple! donon ke baad 12 bajte hai,

aur din badal jaate hai.......

Pyar karne ki apni 1 reet hai.... Pyaar ka dusra naam hi to Preet hai. Isliye Try maro har Ladki par.... Kyunki . Darr ke aage Jeet hai.

Ek Waqt Tha Jab Aapke Msg Aise Aate Thay, Jaise Kisi Ne Aap Ke Sar Pe Pistol Rakhi Hui Hai, Aur Aap Se Sms Karwa Raha Hai.. Magar Ab To Lagta Hai Kisi Ne Aap Ko Goli Hi Maar Di Hai!

[adultstories4u]

Dard se tarapte huwe Vicky ke saamne baith kar who dusra aadmi Vikcy se poocha,

“Kyun mujhko fansaya uss ladki se? kaun hai woh? Main ne to kuch nahin kiya ussi ne mujhko bulaya aur kaha ke usska pati raat ko kaam karta hai to uss se milne aa sakta hoon. Mujhe to yahan ka address ka bhi pata nahin tha ussi ne bulaya mujhe yaahan …kia tum usske pati ho? Agar han to mera kusoor kia hai? Tum yahin the to tum ne to sab dekha aur suna to mujhe kyun goli mari? Mujhe hospital lechalo main kahunga ke kissi ne raaste par chalte huwe goli maari tumhara naam nahin lunga mujhe jaldi lechalo please!”

Vicky apne laptop ke saamne baitha aur camera uss par focus kiya bilkool pehle ki tarah aur ek nakli muskurahat ke sath uss aadmi se kaha,

“Main ne uss ladki se jo kehne ko kaha tha wohi kaha ussne, main ne ussko paise diye the tumko yahan lane ke liye kyun ke mujhe tera interview lena hai!”

Apne ghutne ko zor se pakre huwe uss kutte ne kaha,

“What the fuck! What interview? Eise goli maar kar interview liya jata hai?”

Vicky ne kaha,

“Mera style to eisa hi hai agar tumko passand nahin to mera kia kussoor? Ab chup chaap baithoge ya ek aur goli marun?”

Aaadmi phir ek hath se pasina ponchte aur ek hath ko ghutne sambhale huwe bola,

“Are mere baap, main ne kiya kia hai lagta hai tumko kissi se identity ka ghalati huwa hai main woh nahin jisse tum samajh rahe ho, main to tumko jaanta bhi nahin! Mujhe jaane do, you are mistaken and will comit a grave error if you harm me!”

Vicky camera ko adjust karte huwe bilkol cool andaaz mein, ek cigarette jalate huwe bola,

“Oh really? I am mistaken and you are innocent you say? Okay then what about the rape of Sanjana Joshi that fateful night?”

Yeh sunkar uss aadmi ke chehre ka rang badal gaya aur ziada pasina pasinaa ho gaya, aur bhowklaye huwe Vicky se poocha,

“Kaun ho tum bhai? Tum keise jaante ho uss case ke bare mein?”

Vikcy ne kaha,

“Main ne tum ko maarne ki supari liya hai ab to tum maroge!….”

Woh aadmi kampne laga aur kaha,

“Nahin bhai main ne kuch nahin kiya tha woh to unn chaaron ne milkar…main to sirf unn logon ke saath gaya tha magar kuch nahin kiya tha God Promise……”

Vicky muskuraya aur kaha,

“Achah? Tum ne kuch nahin kiya tha? Thik hai. To itne dinon tak kyun police ko kuch nahin bataya unn charon ke bare mein aur kyun ilzam Vicky Joshi ke sar laga huwa hai?”

Aadmi ne kaha,

“Woh to uss bade baap ke bête ne josh mein aakaar Sanjana se sex karna chaha tha, hum to sirf usske saath gaye the woh paagal hai, awara hai aur kitne ladkiyon ke saath eisa kiya hai ussne… usske paas bahot political power hai woh kaun hai tum jaante ho…… Woh bahot dinon se Sanjana se sex karna chahta tha aur pata hai woh to apne bhai ke saath munh kala karti thi issi liye uss ne bhi wohi karna chaha!! ?!”

Yeh sunte hi Vicky jaldi se uss lohe jeise laathi se usske dusre ghutnon par itna mara ke woh sala rone laga maafi maangte huwe….

Tab Vikcy ne apna nakli chehre se paarda hatate huwe usske saamne khada huwa aur woh aadmi apne chehre ko apne hathon mein chupaakar zameen par dekhne laga yeh kehte huwe,

“Mujhe maaf kardo, maaf kardo mujhe main shadi shuda hoon ek chota bacha hai mera main ussko bahot pyar karta hoon usske liye mujhe chorrdo, main zinadagi mein phir kabhi eisa kaam naahin karunga maaf kardo mujhe!”

Vicky ne kaaha,

“Thik hai to apna jurm kabool karo iss camera ko dekhte huwe aur kaho ke tumne apne saathiyon ke saath milkar Sanjana Joshi ka rape kiya tha aur kitne baar sab kaho aur detail mein batao uss waqt main kahan tha kia haal kiya tha mera tum logon ke mera aur Sanjana keise mari thi sab exactly same bolo iss camera mein main record karunga, usske baad tumko chorr dunga!”

Ussne sab kubool kiya aur sab detail mein bataya jo Vicky ne record kiya.

Usske baad Vikcy ke uss leader ke bare mein detail liya ke woh kaun hai kia karta hai etc….. Uss leader ke bare mein jaankar Vicky pareshaan aur bahot heyraan huwa. Usska taaluk kitne bade logon se hai yeh jaankar Vicky bilkool shocked reh gaya, aur tab samjha kyun sabhi reports nakli prastut kiye gaye usske khilaaf! To sab uss leader ka kiya dharaya tha……

Jab sab recording ho gayi to Vicky uss aadmi ke paas gaya aur uss lohe ki banayi huwi ghunse se takriban 25 baar usske chehre mein maarta gaya yeh kehte huwe,

“Sala randi ke awalaad shadi shuda hai kehta hai, bachah hai tera, nahin hona chahiye tha, kia pata woh bhi tere tarah niklega, meri behen ka rape kiya kutta, suwar, main tujhe nahin chorrunga, maar dalunga…main ne kabhi kissi ko ek thapad bhi nahin mara kamine aaj tum logon kio vajah se main khooni ban gaya hoon, harami ke pille le marr marr sala kutte ki awlaad…..”

Woh aadmki behosh huwa do baar aur usski ek enkh skull se baahar nikal aaya….. Jiss dum Vicky uss lohe se maarta jaa raha tha jeise behosh tha ussko yaad bhi nahin ke kia kar raha hai- ek josh jeisa tha uss waqt aur sirf Sanjana ko yaad karte huwe, maarta chala jaa raha tha…… phir kuch der khade hokar usske khoon se latpath chehre ko dekha, gosht ke tukre latke huwe the uss ke gaal aur enkhon ke niche, ek enkh goal nikla huwa tha baahar latke huwe….. magar woh mara nahin tha… Vicky hanff raha tha ussko dekhte huwe, chaaron taraf khoon hi khoon chitre huwe the, woh ek zinda laash ki tarah usske saamne para huwa tha…Vicky ke muthi khoon se laal ho gaya tha, usske chehre par bhi khoon ke chintein pade huwe the… Vicky apne aap ko aine mein dekh kar ghabra gaya… aur jaldi se revolver se uss kutte ke chaati aur peth mein sabhi golion ko utaar diya…….

Aur ussko bhi sab saaf karke ussi chamre mein lappet kar raat ke andhere mein lejaakar usske ghar ke dwaar par laash ko chorr kar wapas agaya. Uss kamre ko dobara dhoya aur saaf kiya… Aur phir Sanjana ki tasveer ko laptop mein open karke ussko dekhte huwe ro ro kar kaha,

“Baby aur ek ko maar dala main ne aaj…. dekh main badla le raha hoon tere uss apmaan ka, main kamzor nahin hoon baby, oh meri Sanju kitna tarpi thi tu uss raat ko aur main kuch nahihn kar paya tere liye behen, main bahot bebus tha ri mujhe maaf karna Sanju, apne iss bhai ko maaf karna, main kuch nahin kar saka uss raat ko…. Apni pyari si gudya ki raksha nahin kar saka main…. Kia karta baby mujhko bandh rakha tha unn kutton ne, please forgive me baby….. I will not leave the others….. nahin chorunga, ek ko bhi nahin chorunga main…chun chun ke marunga…. Ek aur gaya baby…ek aur gaya……..”

To be continued………………….

The post Faraar (Completed) Update No 20 appeared first on Desi Stories.

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[adultstories4u]

main Khushi 22 saal ki hu aur meri chhoti behan 21 saal ki hai jiska naam hai Priya, meri didi Kavita jo ki 24 saal ki hai unkye shaadi pichhle saal hi hui hai, jija ji bade bhi kamine hain. kyon ki shaadi ke baad se hi woh ham dono behano ki amoli (chhoti chhoti chooch) ko daba dete the pehle to ham dono ko gussa aata tha par ahista ahista ham dono behano ko achha lagane laga, par meri Kavita didi ko ye sab achha nahi lagta tha.

Kavita didi bhi sahi thi kyon ki kisi ka pati agar kahi muh maare to gussa aaega hi. par ham dono behano ko maza aane laga tha.

jijoo bade hi hot hai, jab woh meri chootad pe chutti kaat te the to dard to hota tha par us dard ka ehsaas alag hi hota tha, lagta tha kabhi woh meri penti mein bhi haath daalate, par maan ka strict pahara hota tha shaayad meri maan ko pata tha ki doolha haraami hai, .

kahi meri beti par haath na saaf kar de, is wajah se unka haath meri bra ke andar tak to aaraam se jaata tha jab jab mauqa milta tha,main ab aapko bataati hu, ki kab aisa mauqa aaya tha ki ham dono behan chud gae the jija ji se.

ek din ki baat hai, jija ji Kolkata aaye the kisi kaam se, didi aur jija ji Delhi mein rehte hai, to durgaapur aa gae ham dono se milane ke liye, shaam ko 7 baje pohanche the,ye kahani aap nioo hindi sex storyz dot kom par pad rahe hai.

din mummy aur papa dono bhilai ke liye nikal gae the kyon ki woh mere liye larka dekhne jaana tha shaadi ke liye, aur woh ek din baad aate, jija ji ko jaise hi pata chala ki mummy aaj hi gai hai, to woh bohat hi khush ho gae, Khushi to hamadono ko bhi hui kyon ki ham dono bhi kahi se bhi kaam nahi the ham dono ki jawani lapalapa rahi thi.

raat ko 8 baje ka sho dekhne gae paas hi mein sinema haal tha, beech mein jijoo the agal bagal ham dono behane choochiyaan to wohi se dabaani shuroo ho gai thi, woh dhai ghante mein to dono ke choot se garam garam paani nikalne laga tha.

man to kar raha tha jijoo ke pent ka zip khol kar wohi lund ko muh mein le loo, ya to unky god mein baith ke pura ka pura lund apne choot mein daal loo, par koi baat nahi hamalog gyaarah baje tak ghar aa gae khaana to bahar hi kha liye the.

ab ham log ko sona tha, to soye kaha kaha rajai ek hi bahar thi, baaki trank mein tha, maan chaabhi le ke chali gai thi, thand ki raat thi,

to ham log ek hi razai mein so gae, beech mein jijoo aur said mein ham dono, jijoo pehle meri chhoti behan ke taraf ghoom kar so gae thodi der baad Priya ke muh se aaah aaaah aaaah aaahah ki awaaz nikalne lagi.

mainne foran hi razai hata di dekhi ki Priya top less thi uski badi badi dono choochiyaan khuli hui thi aur jijoo nipple ko masal rahe rahe, the, uske baad main jijoo ko boli ye galat hai jijoo, main badi hu, pehle mujhe aisa karo, to Priya boli didi dekho mujhe josh aa gaya hai maza mat kirakira karo, to jijoo ne kaha dekho raat apni hai, aur koi ghar mein hai nahi kyon na khoob maze kare, aur dono behan ko ek saath chudai karen.thand zyada thi.

phir se razai ke andar chale gae aur phir mainne apna pura kapada utaar diya, Priya bhi saare kapray utaar di. phir kya tha jijoo ke kapray ham dono milakar ek ek kar utaar diye, ham teeno ab ek hi rajai mein nange the.

aur ham teeno ek doosre ko kish kar rahe tha, jijoo meri choochiyaan dabaate aur kabhi pite kabhi pira ka nipple dabaate kabhi pite.

uske baad to woh Priya ke upar chadh gae aur Priya ke dono pair ko alag alag kar ke, lund choot ke beech mein rakh ke, kas ke dhakka maara, tab bhi choot ke andar lund nahi gaya, par Priya ki jaan nikalne lagi kafi dard hone laga woh rone lagi.

phir mainne Priya ko sahalaaya aur Priya ke choochi ko bhi sahalaaya aur jijoo ne phir se taray kiya aur jijoo ne lund pura choot ke andar daal diya, ab jijoo zor zor se Priya ko chodne lage. mainne apna choot jija se chatwaane lagi, woh Priya ko chod rahe the aur meri choot ko chaat rahe tha aur main Priya ke boob ko daba rahi thi.

uske baad main let gai aur jijoo mere upar chadh gae, woh meri choot mein finger dalne lage aur ek haath se choochi ko masalne lage, main aah aah kar rahi thi, Priya jijoo ke gaand mein apni choochi sata rahi thi, phir jijoo apna lund mere choot mein daal diya, aur chodne lage.

kya bataoon yaaron kabhi woh mujhe chodte kabhi Priya ko chodte, raat bhar chudai ka khel chalata raha. raat bhar ek rajai ke andar ham dono behano ki choot ko phaad diya tha jijoo ne, uske baad subah se unko nikalana tha. woh ek baar phir ham dono behano ko choda aur phir chale gae.

The post Jija ne Hum 2 Saaliyo ko Raat Bhar Choda appeared first on Desi Stories.

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