#did anyone else even care but me | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

pale-grunge-dark · 1 year

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I had to use the HTML editor to manually edit that last text post and omg I can’t believe I used to only post using that thing even after tumblr made richtext the default for everyone

#text #like why was I so hell bent on making sure the HTML was clean for my richtext posts #did anyone else even care but me

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nekhcore · 1 year

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mirrors - me and my body over the years.

a short comic i've had bouncing around in my head for a few months.

when i was a kid, every morning felt like flipping a coin on whether i'd feel like shit that day. something was wrong with my body. i didn't know what it was. i was a tomboy and my family wanted me to be ladylike, so i thought i just wasn't femme or white enough.

then i got groomed out of high school, by a worthless excuse for a man who told me he understood me and liked me as i was. i wanted to reconnect with my femininity and asked for help, but he took a mile. he tried to feminize me and neg me into his perfect fantasy bangmaid. every day it was being compared to women who weren't me and being made out to be the bad guy if i didn't cave to one of his demands.

when i got away from him, i could finally examine who i was as a person without anyone else's influence. no family, no high school classmates, no abusive boyfriend. and finally figuring out the answer to that question (what's wrong with me?) didn't make things any easier. turns out i'm not a girl. now i have to live with that knowledge.

i turned 22 this year. i started HRT. i finally have a voice that i like. i have hair on my arms. i have hair on my chin and a little dirt stache. on my birthday, for the first time since i can remember, i saw myself in the mirror and thought "hey, looking good." i think i'm going to be alright.

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twildflower · 2 months

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#twflpokespe #this is him with any other person you ship him with so im just gonna not put anyone else in it #pokemon #pokemon special #pokespe #pokespe meme #reguri #trainer red #namelessshipping #heartgoldshipping #me when i dont know other ship names because i dont ship them!!!#whatever i dont care like it if you want to im only tagging the ones i know #originalshipping #me when i only know two ship names #i think i saved down other ship names somewhere wait #depressionshipping #polishipping #its so sad whys red silver called depression lmamooo #wait okay tags below this are ships i dont think anyone even like knows exist #redcas #redhueshipping #antidoteshipping #lmaooo??? so funny #then these are ones i dont like #did i have to do this? no but i just want to #specialshipping #colorfulshipping #my ss doesnt have any more ships okay next post

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moeblob · 9 months

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Demyx (my beloved)

#kingdom hearts #demyx #honestly is there an organization member i dont like? not really tbh #ok i lied maybe one but even then i find him fascinating so even he gets a pass #demyx being such a good boy who doesnt actually care for fighting then having the whole kh3 thing #where he has the yellow eyes but still just helps the good team vaguely then dips out of the entire game #where did he go and why .... what secrets do you hold young man #i should replay kh3 cause there are things i think i remember but idk for sure #like wasnt there actually a scene where hes just... been benched for being bad at being bad or smth #i really remember a scene where either he says or someone else is like oh yeah he got benched lol #like why does he have to be so funny yet get so little screen time im dying squirtle #though for the record him just handing a mannequin to even and saying peace out for the rest of the game WAS hilarious #this is me living the best time line where not only does demyx just dip and never get mentioned from anyone #but also in an otome i played theres a route where my fave guy just also dips early on #and then in the very end some other LI asks another LI what happened to him btw like where did he go #and the another LI was like oh my god i forgot about him idk man #my favorites just making an appearance and leaving is really funny to me #these tags got super long bc im very stressed and now devoting brain power to vgs in order to not cry

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feline-evil · 2 months

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Dick or no dick confirmation Pickles was always going to be trans to me anyways; if he's swingin' somethin that's phallo babes, if he's not then his t-dick fat. What's not to get.

#metalocalypse #jay talkin #I'm sorry they wrote that awful gross little man far too likeable and relatable to on a trans level #for me not to hoot and holler and cheer for the trans pickles agenda #changes nothing about his character arc or any of the show anyone is capable of being the kind of person he is #don't make the mistake of thinking thats exclusive to cis men #his transness wouldnt change that #only adds on an extra layer to him that i think works fantastically.#Listen that dude was rejected by his family driven to drink and drugs young to escape that ran away to be in a band #is called fucking Pickles of all things and refuses to tell anyone his real last name;#over the span of four seasons and two movies he slowly starts to learn to be for others what he never had #he becomes more caring more supportive #it's not a stretch to say he undoes some of the toxic masculinity he's been keeping himself shielded behind #and learns how to be a kinder man.#all of which have no contradictions with him being trans!#In fact it doesn't take much extra thought to find ways a lot of this can line up with some trans masculine experiences #i mean. Did no one else have a younger phase where they swung as far as they could into crass rude and uncaring ways #to try and assert their masculinity only to grow and realise that you can be a man and be more caring.#Did no one else have father issues. 1 800 come on now i know those are both shared experiences a lot of us have had LOL.#at the end of the day this show aired nearly 20 years ago and is finished. we're not getting more of it #so nothing is altered nor changed if pickles is canonically trans or not ok. its fine #i mean hell i dont even need canon confirmation hes trans to me and thats all i care abt #but i think if yr getting suuuuuper weird abt needing him not to be canonically trans you have some issues #and bio essentialist ideals of gender if you think only a cis man can act like he does #again. anyone can be like that. its not exclusive. him being trans would not change him in any way shape or form lol #AND ALSO GODDDUUUGH for once i love getting to see a guy pushing 50 whos depicted as trans #do you have any idea how dire and barren it is out here. we never get to see a trans guy older than 30 and whos not a pristine model #I WANT MORE OLD SHLUBBY SHITHEAD TRANS GUYS IN MEDIA

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aquanutart · 2 years

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an upside-down truth / a fallen star

#the dragon prince #tdp #aaravos #gif #aquanutart #hi i would like to thank everyone who said on my last pic 'i am reblogging this for the puffballs'#as well as 'your tags have murdered me' etc #truly made the whole experience worthwhile. i still can't tell if anyone got the joke but i no longer care #next in our series of 'it's 2022 why don't you make a brush' i should really make a star brush #instead of sitting there going dot dot dot dot dot dot dot dot dot dot dot ...#even traditional art has a shortcut method for this (it's called putting masking tape on everything and then: splatter)#(advisable to do this first before drawing anything else...)#the good thing is it doesn't actually take a long time to do the dot dot dots it's just kind of repetitive #and you get bored and start writing about it in your tags and then it takes longer because you're not working #i listened to the ff8 soundtrack while making this #i had actually planned to listen to the triple triad music the entire time but #it turned out i couldn't take it for several hours #even though i quickly realized my mistake i ended up having triple triad stuck in my head the whole time anyway. i did this to myself #anyway i was determined to finish this before season 4 dropped #because i also had the idea three years ago and i need to post it before the new season possibly makes it obsolete #threw a wrench into my own schedule by deciding at the last minute that i needed to animate it and i don't know how to animate #then tdp kind of also threw a wrench by releasing the first episode a week early but it's okay i'm still basically in time #i'd personally like it if aaravos were someone who warps and twists the truth and/or has a warped perspective rather than outright lying #i'm convinced there's a meaning to the upside-down star arcana and maybe rotating the key of aaravos can unlock something ??#saying this suddenly gave me flashbacks to the rotation keys in skyward sword rofl what if he's being held in prison #by his own startouch marking being upside-down because it's out of alignment with the universe or something #TWO MORE DAYS let's GO i've been waiting three years to have my theories blown apart

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trentcrimminallybeautiful · 1 month

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you know if we do accept the last epilogue-esque sequence as a sort of dream/wish of ted's and therefore not necessarily canon, very funny if we then simply go "yeah, trent's book is called 'the lasso way' actually. he didn't change that. nope."

#listen on one hand #i think that like #i don't think ted actually changed trent's mind about the title #i think trent changed it because ted asked him to #and like that's especially interesting bc he even made a point of being like #'tell me if you disagree with anything and i'll tell you why you're wrong'#but he respects ted; more than that he likes him and he wants him to like the book--like him #anyone else and trent would have told them to fuck off but ted? ted asking him to change the title? yeah #i think he didn't agree with 'it not being about him'--and not bc of any feelings he may have for ted--but if we accept that him changing #the title is canon then like. he did it because ted asked. nothing more nothing less #maybe he felt he owed it to ted as the subject of the book; maybe he just respected him too much not to #maybe it's partially bc of his feelings; maybe it's because he just couldn't say no to ted #but it's ultimately just. because ted asked him.#and trent respects him; trusts him; cares about him #and that's pretty heartwrenching #but like on the other hand if we say 'no that was ted's wishufl thinking trent definitely went 'sorry ted it's called the lasso way''#also like.... him being like. like quietly not changing it and if ted said something him just. being like #ted. i respect you. i care about you. i trust you. but with all due respect absolutely not #yes it isn't ONLY about you but YOU made this happen. YOU are special and YOU have a place here whether you can stay forever or not #yes it's about the team and the coaches yes you aren't a one man band but ted. TED. you touched lives. you changed lives. and that was YOU.#that was you and your philosophy and your attitude.#you made richmond what it is today. yes the team deserve credit too for the kind of bond they have now but YOU facilitated that #none of the coaches currently here woudl be coaches if not for you. the diamond dogs wouldn't exist. literally every single one #of our friends--OUR friends--wouldn't be where they are and probably wouldn't be as happy #you got through to people over and over again who were hurting and lashing out. to rebecca. to roy. to jamie. to nate. to me.#and you can be humble but there's being humble and there's acting like you don't matter to any of us like you didn't have an impact #like you can just leave without a trace. we don't blame you for leaving--i especially don't--but acting like we won't miss you and like #your time with all of us--our time--meant nothing is more insulting than it is humble because we /love you/#and yes. it was the goddamn lasso way that built this place #this community.

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cream-and-tea · 7 months

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[ID in alt]

pallas + giftgiving ❤️

#including not one but TWO instances of stealing stuff from calliope they’re so unserious #i didn’t even notice i’d done that twice until reading through to make this post but i think i should keep it that’s actually so funny 2 me #pallas why r you stealing shit from the person you’re obsessed with in a nemesis way to give to #the girl you’re obsessed with in a besties way what is WRONG with you #<— i bully but this post exists because i got overwhelmed with affection for them #bc like. they’re trying SO HARD they don’t know how to care in a way that isn’t destructive but they’re TRYING #and they do care they care so much they just don’t know how to express it and they don’t! want! to hurt her!#they believe that they will eventually but they don’t WANT to!!!!!#pallas outwardly: gives agnes a littol present #pallas inwardly: i would tear my heart still beating from my ribcage if it meant keeping you safe #they are NOT self aware about this though whenever they do something nice for agnes or anyone else their narration is just like #‘wow so weird that i did that moVING ON’ we don’t gain the ability to self reflect until book 2 #wip: ghost story #pallas #creme does a writing

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stop-breaking-my-heart-dragonage · 2 months

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Me, when Sebastian joins my party for the first time: Okay, this time I'm not going to forget about you, Sebastian. I'm going to make an effort to use you a lot this playthrough so I can better understand you.

Also me, immediately forgetting about Sebastian while finishing Act 2 and making it halfway through Act 3 before I finally notice his Faith quest: ......................Oh. Right. My bad.

#da2 #dragon age 2 #sebastian vael #listen in my defense..........i don't like bringing sebastian anywhere sksksks #okay look i seriously tried but every time i bring him somewhere i always think man i wish i had brought someone else #and also i do just forget about him! i finally added him to my party at one point and he had 24 points to spend...#that's how long i neglected him after i promised myself i was gonna use him more and then i didn't #it's not that i don't like sebastian as a character though i do tend to side eye him A LOT... it's just that i like everyone else more #even aveline like i'd take aveline over sebastian any day and that's saying something... or is it? i have a lot of feelings about aveline #whereas my feelings about sebastian could maybe fill a thimble...it doesn't help that in my canon run as a mage hawke #i romance anders and well... sebastian wants me to kill anders and my hawke is like 'do i approve of blowing up the chantry? complicated.'#'am i breaking up with anders for this? absolutely. do i still love him? mmhmmm. am i going to kill him sebby? i'd sooner set varric aflame #then sebastian threatens to bring an army to kirkwall and leaves so i can't say i have the greatest opinion on him #even the time where i did kill anders and he stayed in my party he was just... there #and then he glitched out and started t posing while asking if ed ever found out what anders wanted to do in the chantry so..... yeah #but even this playthrough where i'm playing as a lady warrior with a different personality and everything... i'd just rather use anyone els #also keep him away from bethany i do not approve sksksks she's too good for him #i want to understand and see the different angles of him like with the other companions but i've yet to convince myself to do it #also sebastian romancers out there can you like... explain? genuinely can you explain the appeal? i'm curious #because of all the love interests in da2 i look at sebastian and you'd think i'd maybe be more interested? but it's like...#i know about the chaste marriage and everything like that's fine i don't need sex to be a thing in the relationship but it feels less like #an asexual romance and more like... y'know... being with a priest and i guess that's just not one of my kinks? sksksks #i guess there's also the prince angle but i romanced alistair in dao and kept him a grey warden i don't really care about royalty power #and i don't have issues with him being a part of the chantry [well i do but yknow what i mean] since i romanced cullen in dai #and his whole deal with the chantry and magic and shit makes his romance interesting to me but sebastian is just.... a bit too much i think #i don't know i'd like to understand because i really don't but i also keep forgetting about him

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dbphantom · 17 days

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I hate being an entity that is comprised of nothing but guilt. I need to call out of work tomorrow because I haven't been able to eat since lunch on Friday and I STILL feel super guilty because my coworker took tomorrow off and he's the only one I know of who can cover the area when I'm out sick. And like logically I know they're just going to have to cope but MAN

#If it were anyone else I'd be cheering like 'fuck em they'll cope' but when it's me I'm like 'oh my god I'm a horrible person for this'#It's so fuckin annoying and exhausting caring so much all the time even about shit that really doesn't matter #And like??? Logically I know this is HOW they exploit people. By making them feel guilty for doing stuff they're legally allowed to do.#That doesn't change the fact I still feel guilty about it #BUT! I did call off. So go me!#Don't get me wrong I like the ppl so I told them where the MEI I wrote up was if it could help someone cover but I still called out 👍#Cruddy rambles

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rosicheeks · 1 month

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To anyone who messages me - I’m sorry. Im sorry I suck at replying 99% of the time. I’m sorry I don’t have the mental capacity to hold a conversation. I’m sorry if you see me active on here reblogging and answering asks but I still haven’t replied to your message. I’m sorry I want to talk to you but I get overwhelmed by the smallest things.

I really really really hope you never think I’m purposely ignoring you or trying to hurt you in any way. I hope you can understand that I’m truly trying my best.

#there’s a lot going on behind this screen that I haven’t been telling you guys #I’m exhausted and overwhelmed #I’ve been trying SO hard to keep my friendships and reply to people #but when I have a billion other things going on that’s taking all of my time and energy I just can’t #I don’t understand how adults can juggle everything #well wasn’t expecting that anon to hit me like it did but okay #I hope that anon and all of you take care of yourselves #just remember you can only know a small portion of the blogger #yes I’ve been super duper open about a lot of shit #but you guys still don’t *know* me #I don’t even fucking know me if I’m gonna be honest #so how can anyone else know me if I only choose to show a little part of myself on here #idk if any of this is making sense #but I just needed to get it out #I feel like I might know who the anon was and I’m really sad if I hurt them in any way #shut up rosie

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softshuji · 1 month

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Any men out there wanna pretend to be my bf to get my parents off my case about marriage? I am so so serious right now.

#my mom gave me a really really lonf lecture and upset me because her and my dad want me to start thinking about settling down ans getting #married. again. cos this comes up all the time. ans I reiterated that i do wanna marry and have kids. i know im 26 years old why do they'#think im also not aware of this??? like i suddenly forgot my own age and have my head in the clouds all the time. and i got so heated cos i #said they only believe in that in theory. in reality neither of them have accepted the idea od my leaving home or the idea of mw being with #a man. and they start freaking out if they even find out i talk to them so to say they want me to get married is so fucking naive #ans when i mentioned this and that they're more than ok w mt brothers talking tp women she said that if i wanted to settle down she could #talk to dad and they could “go about finding someone for me” and I've never been so pissed #i got so upset. why does everyone keep saying this to me. as if anyone my dad knows could ever be a half decent man #and the truth is they don't care if im in a happy marriage they've accepted that i won't be they only care that im gone and saving face in #front of family. that's all. it's always reputation it's always “what will people say?”#not once did love come up. not once did shw even imply that i should marryfor love #or that they hope i love someone and marry them. because they're more happy with the idea of me marrying for the sake of it than #they are at the idea of me finding genuine lovw #im not a fucking broodmare im not here to push out babies for the sake od reputation.#and then i said nor being married isn't the end of the world and she said “it's important that you settle down”#and i said im unwavering in my principles. she can call mw high maintenance like she loves doing but I'm not wavering on the #kind of man i want to be with and when i do marry him i want it to bw genuine. because be loves me and vice versa not because im ticking off #somethin from a damn checklist to appease them. and if being unwavering on my principles means staying unmarried then so be it.#my obligations are to god and myself and that's it #and y'know what??? i am in love with a boy already #and yet they don't care that i wanna be in love at all. no im just a puppet to follow a certain narrative in life live according to evergone #else has and that's it.#im done.#and then she tried to apologise by getting me a slice of cake and that somehow made me feel worse.#i dont want an apology. i want to be heard and actually listened to for once. i want someone to ask what i want. to actually give a shit #and love me cos it's me. not cos im some thing to further an agenda. or some toy or puppet that does your bidding.#is it so much??? to just want to be loved in return? to marry and live according to how i want to?? ans not want anyone to make these #decision's for me?#ruined my whole day.

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kavehater · 2 months

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AAAH I have a mutual who’s 18 and he sorta kinda is flirting with this one guy who is a minor as a joke of course ( to which a concerned anon said that it’s weird ) but I can’t help but flashback to er*s

#granted the er*s situation was thoroughly complex and the reason she did those things was her copism with not being able to pull ( LLLLLLL )#and ik that guy doesn’t mean any harm etc etc he’s not messed up like some ppl #BUT I DUNNO STILL #sobbing #they’re pretty sweet so #hes*#OH AND HES IRAQI TOO I LEGIT COULDNT BELIEVE THAT #dora daily #lowkey kinda sorta sad that a whole anon was more concerned than ppl i knew and who knew my age #and freely saw it happen so readily #and everyone else on that blog #genuinely and utterly disappointed #it’s always protect minors until the minors need protecting goddamn #this is especially directed at rhy yeah I’m not censoring that #🤷‍♀️#too busy simping over minor characters who don’t have a time skip in canon and aging them up then complaining about it when ppl call out #the brain deadery of that behaviour #girl pls #you did not care about minors from the beginning literally bye #e[redacted] literally ruined my brain chemistry to say the least I will never go into how what she did absolutely muddled my brain never #told anyone and I don’t think I can ever tell someone ever #not to mention practically hyperventilating being unable to breath literally going into madness and ppl think that I’m overreacting and #telling me to shut up about it and blaming me for the situation as if I wanted any of this #lmaolmaolmao #all that and I was expected to do uni girl byeeee I need a good century to recover at least ☠️#the only thing I DID want is friends but clearly that was a hard ask when ppl can get friends just by existing on this god forsaken app #atp I don’t even know what to say literally just wth #yall say mdni with your dumbass banners and decorate it like something special when yall are the ones to keep from minors you disgusting #wastes of clean oxygen 😭 mdni my foot gross ass adults should’ve never trusted them #the way I’d give them therapy to their complex traumas ☠️ imagine relying on a minor for therapy

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solradguy · 9 months

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Whenever I see someone being transphobic on twt in a bridget thread i reply with three pictures of my mains: ky kiske from ac+r, ky kiske from rev 2, and ky kiske from strive.

it self selects for people who actually play the game. it’s canon that he’ll fight off transphobes with the blade. and if they actually played guilty gear they’d get the underlining messages

While it can be really funny to bully these guys back, please keep in mind that nothing you can say or do to these people will hurt them or waste as much of their time as what they say will stick with you or waste your time. It might be funny to send them a bunch of Ky pictures, but what they're doing is laughing that the only response the people they hate can give them is sending a bunch of pictures of anime boys.

The only thing that works is blocking them. They've turned being an asshole into a recreational sport and getting any sort of response in return is a victory for them.

#asks #Unfortunately I was an asshole on the internet once (not a vicious transphobe just a basic internet asshole)#I know exactly how these people function because I was there once...#When you don't take the person you're arguing with seriously it's very easy to laugh at every single thing they do #Which is what these guys are doing. It doesn't matter how well thought out the counter argument is. They don't care and they won't care #All you can hope for is that they're young and they grow out of it (I did)#I feel bad for them because I think about what led to me being like that decades ago. Are they going through the same thing?#I was like that because I was in a hopeless situation and hated myself and hated everyone else #People arguing back just proved my point that everything sucked and my hate was justified #It's an awful feedback loop. People being kind to me felt disingenuous. Why should they be kind? I hated them. They had no reason to be nic #I had to get to a point where I was willing to help myself crawl out of that pit before I let anyone else even get near me emotionally #I still remember the day when I realized I was being a fucked up little shit to everyone lol #Early June 2011. It was sunny with no clouds and there was a cool breeze. I was listening to In This Moment and I realized #'What the hell am I doing? Do I want to be like this forever? Get your shit together man'#It was a slow process from there but I did get out of it. Slowly. Very slowly.#There's a lot I did that I regret and can't ever apologize for because it was so long ago and the names and faces are gone now #Apologizing at this point would be selfish and only for my benefit anyway. I can only hope that what I did didn't hurt people permanently #Anyway. I've never talked about this on here before because it's the kinda shit that gets put on callout posts out of context #So. I am laying my naked soul bare and raw for the sake of underlining my original point: Internet trolls don't care

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exdeputysonso · 5 months

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The Mound Builders (1976) Press Photo

#brad dourif #the mound builders #my scans #i'm not cropping this one to be cleaner i think it adds to the charm #please look at the diy cut and glue together photoshopping the newspaper did #they did good like i didn't even notice it at first until looking closer #idk that anyone else cares but doesn't matter you get to hear me ramble about my collection #i love the vintageness of it and the little details

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aq2003 · 9 months

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series 3 is so frustrating because there is like a shining core of pure diamond underneath the problems . like conceptually it rocks so incredibly hard. but the problems

#dr who #i am being so honest when i say ten should have gotten on his knees and begged for simm!master's life #they should have framed the bit between him and martha's mom so different #like yes it is 10000% in character that the doctor with his bleeding heart and loneliness wouldn't want to kill him #even after everything that happened. because he's the only person he has left. 'i forgive you' was PERFECT.#but literally anyone else that suffered from what the master did. Deserves to rip him to shreds. so very obviously #and like i know.i KNOW that i am watching the 'funny immortal alien saves people through time and space' show #but i actually despise the doctor being framed as like an all powerful savior. or treated like one. even for a little bit. is Annoying #the first part of the series 3 finale having martha be humanity's last hope was SO GOOD bc it like kind of set her up as like #having to grapple with all that responsibility and attention like the doctor does. everyone's lives are in her hands. so crunchy #but when it like slides into 'everyone pls believe in our specialest boy in the world The Doctor <3' it just. falls flat #i feel like with a couple tweaks here and there in the execution and like actual fuckinnn people of color in the writer's room #series 3 would be PEAK media. but as it is it's just. falling short.#i do really appreciate martha deciding to leave ten on her own though. first of all. qpp down. second of all #she's realized that she can't keep traveling with him. bc (as i mentioned) hes someone who simultaneously needs saving #and refuses to be saved in the ways that matter. Yes im fucking ignoring the unrequited romance angle i think #it does a gigantic disservice to martha's character if u boil her down to that. fight me i dont care if that was the authorial intent #martha in the end is too kind to ten and ten keeps making her watch his meandering path of self destruction. toxic doomed qprism to ME.#anyway fuck. idk man series 2 consensus was that im dead inside and series 3 consensus is that the version i have of it in my head is peak #series 2 is better but i think because of my ten martha insanity i actually enjoyed watching series 3 more than series 2.#even if i got mad at it more than any other season. i think something is wrong with me. um. lmao #ten and martha #10 era

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