#do you guys GET WHT I M SAYING..
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jujumin-translates · 5 months ago
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[A3!] Tsuzuru Minagi | [R] Casually Showing Skin Mode | L3tt3r Fr0m A Gy4ru
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Tsuzuru: (And I’m finally done with classes for the day. Okay, guess I’ll head home—.)
Tsuzuru: (Hm? That’s quite the crowd. Wonder what’s going on…)
Taichi: Ah, Tsuzuru-kuuun!
Juza: Good work.
Tsuzuru: Oh, so you guys are here too. Is there some kinda event going on or something?
Taichi: I dunno, we just got here. It sure is busy. Wonder what’s up.
Juza: Huh, there’s a whole lotta stuff here. They’ve got random things, books, ‘n even household appliances lined up.
Tsuzuru: Ahh, I get it… It’s probably a reuse market.
Taichi: Reuse market?
Tsuzuru: It’s a kinda on-campus event where students who are about to graduate give away things they don’t need anymore to younger students.
Juza: Now that ya mention it, you got a book of short stories at the last one, didn’t ya, Tsuzuru-san?
Tsuzuru: Yeah, I was curious about this one that one of the upperclassmen told me about, but it happened to be out of print.
Taichi: Damn, lucky! Where’s that book now?
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Tsuzuru: After I finished reading it, I started passing it around the company to anyone who wanted to read it.
Tsuzuru: That reminds me, I wonder who’s got it now…
Taichi: Who are the ones who wanted to read it?
Tsuzuru: Umm, Miyoshi-san, and Takato-san have already read it… And I think Furuichi-san and Tsukioka-san said they were interested too.
Juza: I’m interested in readin’ it too.
Tsuzuru: Gotcha. I’ll bring it over to you whenever I get it back then, Juza.
· • —– ٠ ✤ ٠ —– • ·
Tsuzuru: I’m back.
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Tsuzuru: (...Huh, did I leave a book out on my desk…?)
Tsuzuru: (Ah, that was the book we were just talking about. What perfect timing to get it back. I’ll go and bring it over to Juza right aw—.)
*Paper falls out of the book*
Tsuzuru: …Hm? Did something just fall out of it?
Tsuzuru: A note?
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Thx 4 l3nding m3 thiz, Tzr-kun. I w4z rlly impr3zz3d w h0w clvr th3 f0r3shad0wing w4z. Th3 nam3z of th3 flwrz n th3 flwr l4ngu4g3 m3nti0n3d n th3 prlg s3nt such 4 shvr d0wn my spin3 tht I rlzd tht th3 clprt mightv3 4ctlly b33n TwT nstd 0f xD. If I w3r3 t0 pl4y tht r0l3, M sur3 thtz wht I wld d0…
Tsuzuru: The hell…? Is this a cipher or a prank or something?
Tsuzuru: —Ah.
Tsuzuru: Is this… that gyaru-speak thing?
· ❀ —– ٠ ❀ ٠ —– ❀ ·
Tsuzuru: Jeez, he better still be here…
Omi: Welcome back.
Izumi: Hey, Tsuzuru-kun, would you rather have curry udon or soy milk curry hotpot for dinner tonight?
Tsuzuru: Aren’t both of them still curry? Well, it was pretty cold today,  so hotpot would be…
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Tsuzuru: Wait, that’s not what I’m here for! Is Miyoshi-san here?
Omi: Kazunari’s in the kitchen.
· • —– ٠ ✤ ٠ —– • ·
Kazunari: Lookin’ for me~?
Tsuzuru: The hell is this? I literally can’t read any of it…
Kazunari: Oh, gyaru-speak! What’s this about?
Tsuzuru: What do you mean ‘what’s this about’...? You didn’t write this?
Tsuzuru: It was stuck in the book I just got back, and you’re the only one who would write something like this, Miyoshi-san…
Kazunari: Ermm~, well, it wasn’t me.
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Tsuzuru: What? But if it’s not you, then the people who I lent the book to after you were Takato-san, Furuichi-san, Tsukioka-san—.
Tsuzuru: No, it had to have been you, Miyoshi-san.
Izumi: Maybe if you read the note you’ll be able to figure out who wrote it?
Tsuzuru: Right. Umm—.
Tsuzuru: …
Tsuzuru: Yeah, not happening. I’ve got no clue what it says no matter how hard I try to read it…
Izumi: Let me see. …Umm, I can’t read it either.
Omi: Those don’t even look like sentences to me.
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Tsuzuru: Damnit. What are we gonna do…?
Kazunari: I’ve gotcha, fam. I’ve got this gyaru-speak translator website.
Kazunari: Just gotta take a pic, scan the text, and… copy-paste and translate ♪
Tsuzuru: That’s incredible… So, what does it say?
Kazunari: “Thank you for lending me this, Tsuzuru-kun. I was really impressed with how clever the foreshadowing was. The names of the flowers and the flower language mentioned in the prologue—.”
Kazunari: “Sent such a shiver down my spine that I realized that the culprit might’ve actually been crying instead of laughing.”
Kazunari: “If I were to play that role, I’m sure that’s probably what I would do…”
Kazunari: Wait, could this be…
Tsumugi: I’m back~.
Tsuzuru: Perfect timing. Um, Tsukioka-san. About this note…
Tsumugi: Ah! Thank you for the book, it was really interesting.
Tsuzuru: No, not that…! Did you write this, Tsukioka-san?
Tsumugi: Yeah. Ah, did I forget to write my name on it?
Tsuzuru: Forget about that! Why is it in gyaru-speak!?
Tsumugi: Kazu-kun told me that gyaru stuff and gyaru-speak are really popular nowadays, so I tried using it.
Kazunari: Ohh~, yeah, so, I might’ve told TsumuTsumu about that translation website the other day…
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Tsuzuru: So it WAS because of you!
Tsumugi: Ahaha, maybe I should’ve written it normally. Sorry, my bad.
Izumi: I never would’ve thought it was you, Tsumugi. That was quite a surprise.
Omi: Yeah. Good thing we figured it all out.
Kazunari: But like, wasn’t it kinda fun? It was like a little cipher game.
Tsumugi: Yeah, and it was really easy to do. Why don’t we recommend it to the others?
Kazunari: Banger idea, bestie! I bet RonRon and Taicchan would eat this up, don’tcha think?
Tsumugi: I bet Azuma-san and Homare-san would enjoy it too.
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Tsuzuru: Wait! Quit trying to come up with weird trends!
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espresso1patronum · 7 months ago
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Megumi Fushiguro x Reader- THEY SET US UP
Smau
Group chat fic
Synopsis- You're a college student. You're best friends with Nobara, Maki and Panda (roomies with Nobara and Maki). Your friend group has a close relationship with another group that includes Megumi, Yuji, Toge and Yuta. Gojo is your head coach at the college(lol) and is good friends with you guys. (Everybody's aged up)
CW- slight swearing, nothing else ig (this is a jjk smau)
Your pov
THE GIRLS(CRAZY BISHES)
You, Maki, Nobara, Panda
Nobara(gf)-
guys it's Saturday tmrw. let's go out?
Panduh💖🐼-
Aaah yes, let's do a girl's night out!!
You-
Yeah, sounds cool.
Maki(MOMMY)-
(replied to Panduh💖🐼)
Why tf are you in this gc?
Nobara(gf)-
idk either, yn?
You-
Girls come on, Panda's our bbg. We agreed to keep him in this gc
Panduh💖🐼-
That's why you're my fave, girl<3
You-
<33333
Maki (MOMMY)-
Anyways.. so girls night out tmrw?
Panduh💖🐼-
YAAAASSSSSSS
Nobara(gf)-
Yess bishes
You-
Umm guys maybe we could yk..
Nobara(gf)-
Whatt
Maki(MOMMY)-
What?
Panduh💖🐼-
??
You-
Maybe we could call the guys as well?
Panduh💖🐼-
Well if you say so...🙄
Nobara(gf)-
Ohh, I get it😏🤭
Maki(MOMMY)-
Oh yes haha💀
You-
What?
Nobara(gf)-
M
E
G
U
M
I
Panduh💖🐼-
✨💕😘
You-
Wtf is wrong with you guys.
I just wanna hang out with Yuji and toge.
(They're more fun)
Maki(MOMMY)-
Girl's in denial. yn you're *down bad* for him.
You-
Shut tf up
I hate you guys
Nobara(gf)-
We love you too yn😘
ok so I'll message Yuji to tell the guys..
Panduh💖🐼-
Gr8
You-
Okie
Maki(MOMMY)-
Imma message yuta
Panduh💖🐼-
(replied to Maki(MOMMY))
😏*coughs*
Nobara(gf)-
(replied to Maki(MOMMY)-
😏ahem
You-
(replied to Maki(MOMMY)
😏💀hehe
Maki(MOMMY)-
Shut tf up morons.
MEGUMI'S POV
HOMIESS👾😈🤬
You, Gojo, Toge, Yuji, Yuta
Itadork-
GUYSSSSSSSSSS LISTENNNNN
Yuta🙂-
Yuji, what happened? Don't tell me you ate the leftover spoilt ramen again
Itadork-
(replied to Yuta🙂)
No, it's not that. And it was ONCE alr? And it TASTED GOOD.
Yuta🙂-
Ok fine whatever
Togay-
(replied to Itadork)
Wtf happened Yu? It's 3 in the morning fr
You-
(replied to Itadork)
Wht happened?
(replied to Togay)
It's freaking 5pm rn.
Gojo(idiot)-
Guyss chillllll.... Yuji what's up??
Togay-
(replied to you)
M in america ho!
You-
(replied to Togay)
Sure, just stfu
Yuta🙂-
Guys pls calm down
Gojo(idiot)-
*Enjoying the drama and eats popcorn
You-
(replied to Gojo(idiot))
??
Itadork-
Anywayss the girls are inviting us to hang out tmrw.. guys gonna come rightt?
Yuta🙂-
Yes, Maki will be there too sooo
Togay-
Yeah let's hang out. Imma come
You-
Cool I'll come as well
Togay-
(replied to you)
Wear smthg good. yn's gonna be there too. Don't wear your emo ass clothes
You-
(replied to Togay)
Did I ask? And shut tf up alr?
Togay-
Justt helpingg you out🙂🦎
Don't want her screaming and running away from you, do ya?
You-
(replied to Togay)
The only thing she's gonna be screaming at (infact everybody) is your face, after seeing it.
Gojo(idiot)-
Guyssss chillll downn ❄️❄️
Itadork-
SENSEIII YOU COMINGG????
Gojo(idiot)-
YUSSS
Itadork-
AYOOOOO YESS
\⁠(⁠^⁠o⁠^⁠)⁠/
NO ONE'S POV
New gc
OPERATION:MAKE 'EM CONFESS🗣️❣️
Created by Panda on 12/10
Gojo, Maki, Nobara, Panda, Toge, Yuji, Yuta
Panda-
GUYSS WASSUP?
Yuji-
HELLO WHAT IS THIS GRP?
Maki-
Read the room?
Yuji-
What?
Gojo-
OHHH I GET ITT
Nobara-
(replied to gojo)
Do you?
Gojo-
No
Maki-
Who tf added @Gojothestrongestalive?
Panda-
Me?
Maki-
Wtf why?
Yuta-
Anyways guys let's get to it... we need to make yn and fushiguro confess
Yuji-
\⁠(⁠°⁠o⁠°⁠)⁠/ whatt? Did they commit a crime or smthg?
Nobara-
Who tf let this idiot in the grp?
Panda-
(replied to Yuji)
Noo we want them to confess to eachother
Yuji-
Oh ok GOT IT
Toge-
What's the plannn guyss?
Yuta-
We go to the movies together, ghost both of them, leaving em alone w eachother
Toge-
Alonee😏😏 fushiguro's a freak btw soo smthg could happen
Nobara-
(replied to Toge)
How tf do you know😭
Toge-
I jus do🤭🙄
Yuji-
SUS
Maki-
Guys I think the plans alr
Lets go w it
Gojo-
YESS GUYSS I CANT WAIT TO SEE MY LOVELY CUTE STUDENTS TOGETHER! THEY GROW UP SO FAST. TT✨
Nobara-
(replied to Gojo)
*Man-child crying
Gojo-
I'm just emotional that's all
Yuji-
So we meet up at 7 tmrw?
Maki-
Yeah
Toge-
Yes
Yuta-
👍
Nobara-
Okk
Gojo-
Greatt
Panda-
Great job guys, we're gonna succeed! 💪🏻
NEXT DAY
You're getting ready in room with Maki and Nobara, all dressed in cozy, stylish clothes, gearing up for a fun movie hangout together.
"Where do we wait?" you ask Maki as the three of you arrive at the movie theatre.
"Oh right," Maki said, glancing at Nobara. "We'll meet up with the guys. You wait here, okay?" She motioned for Nobara to follow her as they walked off.
You wondered where Panda was as you had not seen him the entire day.
Suddenly, a notification popped up on your phone, and you saw a message from Megumi. You felt a bit flustered and tapped to open it.
emo(gumi)🦇
Him-
Hey
You-
Yo wassup
Him-
Maki and Nobara told me that you've bought all the popcorn for us and said you need help.
You-
No, I didn't buy popcorn. They said they were going to meet up with you guys
Him-
Wth. They did come.
You-
Where are they rn?
Him-
Disappeared.
You-
Thank you sm
Him-
?
What do we do now?
You-
Get actuall popcorn, and go see the movie?
Him-
Togeher?
You-
Yeah, fuck them
Him-
Whatever you say, idiot.
You-
Shut up.
Him-
Meet me by the lobby.
You-
Okie.
You felt flustered, your cheeks warming as you made your way down to the lobby, to meet Megumi.
Midway through the movie, you couldn't shake the feeling that someone was watching. Glancing over your shoulder, you saw the other guys spying on you and Megumi from a little farther back.
"They set us up," you murmured as you set a glance at Megumi.
He smiled, not missing a beat. "I'm glad they did".
The rest of the group watched you both with satisfied grins, clearly pleased with their little scheme. Gojo and Panda looked like they were about to tear up from excitement, while Maki and Toge exchanged smirks. Meanwhile, Yuji and Nobara were bickering over the popcorn and Yuta, ever the calm one, took a picture of you two with a soft smile on his face.
The end?
(hope y'all liked it)
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asknarashikari · 2 years ago
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jumping off from here... https://asknarashikari.tumblr.com/post/729167157905195008/so-the-context-of-this-ask
Keiwa suddenly appears in front of Daiji at Blue Bird's HQ, holding the latest addition to the Igarashis...
Daiji: stand down.
Daiji: I hope this doesn't happen too often, Keiwa... but wht are you doing here? With Koshiro too.
Keiwa: Someone has been chasing me, I'm not sure whether the target is me or Koshiro-kun.
George: Oi, oi, did you lead your pursuer here?
Keiwa: Of course not, why else would I have utilized my buckle's teleportation powers to come here?
Daiji: Are you saying.
Keiwa: I'm meeting with Neon-chan after I drop Koshiro-kun here.
Keiwa: I need to see if I'm the target or not.
Hiromi: Isn't it a bit dangerous to make yourself the bait?
Keiwa: Sadly, they'd just destroy the city to lure me out.
Daiji; So it's safer for you to be the bait.
Hana: Why would you need to meet with Neon-chan?
Daiji: Of course! You're acquiring a doll from her to act as Koshiro.
Keiwa: Yeah... its the safest option.
Daiji: Take this *hands something to keiwa* that's a tracker, we'll know where you are at all times.
Daiji: We'll come to your rescue if you press it.
Hiromi: and be sure to press it if you need it.
Keiwa: Thanks for the help.
keiwa: *disappears*
Hiromi: He really teleported.
Hiromi: Those raise buckles are really as powerful as you said they were, Daiji.
Hana: is it really safe to let him to go to the lion's den?
George: What's the worry, Bujin Sword has suffered no losses since it was created, it only suffered a draw but that buckle is as undefeated as Geats IX and Musuo.
Daiji: I"m not even going to ask how you know that.
Daiji; When you shouldn't know that.
Hiromi: And he teleported again.
Hiromi: And he's on foot.
Daiji: That's heading to where nii-chan is practicing.
Daiji: I'll inform nii-chan.
====
Keiwa: ikki-san?
Ikki: I heard. Where's the doll?
Keiwa: So I'm the target. I left the doll with nee-chan
Ikki: Any plans?
Keiwa: I'm leading him away from the populace.
ikki: The quarry. *nods*
Keiwa: Yeah, i'm planning to fight them there.
Ikki: Count me in.
Keiwa: But...
Ikki: I'm the nosiest person in Japan, remember?
Ikki: I will be on your business whether you like it or not.
Keiwa: I'll be in your care then.
----
*one Bujin Sword and Revi beatdown later*
Ikki: I don't know if I should be sorry or thankful.
Ikki: I'm thankful that nothing happened to kaa-chan and tou-chan on their trip.
Ikki: Or sorry that you got saddled with this.
keiwa: Don't worry about it.
keiwa: its not like you know that someone from the old management would try to get me... believing that I'm the god of creation.
Keiwa: Seriously where did that come from?
Keiwa: Ac-
Keiwa: Of course, Ace! Show your mug!
Ace: Tycoon.
Keiwa: Care to explain why some people think I'm the god of creation?
Ace: When they arrive here, the world where Ukiyo Ace is forgotten, all of their knowledge of me is modified.
Ace: And since, we're kind of foils to each other, in everything... it modified into thinking you were the god of creation.
Keiwa: A warning would have been nice.
AcE: Besides, that guy *points at the disintegrating figure* wasn't the only trying to revive the old management by getting their own god of creation.
AcE: I just got done disposing more of them.
Ikki: I feel like this is our fault.
AcE: I heard about that.
AcE: I don't think its your fault, Tycoon's luck is just that.
Keiwa: Gee, thanks.
Keiwa: But Ikki-san, its nothing.
Keiwa: I still love to take care of Koushiro, I need a break from studying.
Ikki: He's in your care.
...Why do y'all just keep sending me your fanfics instead of publishing them lmao
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lucyandthepen · 3 years ago
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a lesson on style - iii . [ ljn | njm ]
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pt. i, pt. ii, pt. iii, pt. iv.,  pt. v, pt. vi
you’ve always been content with being associated with one word and one word only: average. average in looks, academics and social skills, you’re just looking to graduate high school without causing disasters you’ll have to live with until you kick the bucket. when you’re paired with school king lee jeno for the semester-long physics thesis, you can’t help but think the entire situation has pretty much set itself up for failure. that is, until you strike a deal with your partner. alternatively: an au tale involving lessons in popularity, eleven consecutive B­ minuses, a secretly sensitive, chess­-loving jock, and an amateur sex tape.
pairing: jeno x fem!reader, jaemin x fem!reader verse: high school au { jocks!nomin ft. a super cute whiny ap physics genius renjun } rating: M for sexual themes chapter warnings: none word count: 5.6k
author’s note: because like two people have said they want chapter 3 i, a textbook people pleaser, have arrived :^) 
                                                         *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
Your Facebook boasts a picture of you in Jeju-do last summer.
You actually haven’t changed it since then because you don’t think that a profile picture is worth anything, but apparently, Lee freaking Jeno really likes that shot of you standing by the shoreline in your I ❤️ JEJU t-shirt and your knee-length cut-offs, a disturbingly huge orange starfish in hand. He likes it so much that he’s not only looked at it, but he’s also asked his friend to tell you he has, which is just about the most flattering thing you could do with regard to someone’s profile picture without actually being the one to personally do anything about it.
In conclusion, the butterflies in your stomach aren’t just going crazy; they’re screaming their tiny lungs out.
Your first reaction is to call Renjun and tell him, but he’s only on his way home now, and, somehow, you don’t really know if he’s in the right mood to talk to you about Jeno (or, rather, to listen to you talk about him). You’ve also been staring way too long at your laptop screen without doing anything substantial, so much so that Jaemin is back on his keyboard, according to the three little dots that appear in the chat box again.
Na Jaemin: did I scare u off
You: no no omg I was just
You: taking notes
Na Jaemin: for wht?
Na Jaemin: by teh wa y is Zhong Cjelne at your house?
Na Jaemin: *Cehnel
Na Jaemin: *CHENLE
You: yes! why
You: do you need me to call him
Na Jaemin: no but can you pas s a messge
Na Jaemin: can u tell him isf]
Na Jaemin: jesus fuck ing crihtst
You: I don’t know how to pronounce that
Na Jaemin: sorry can u just tell him he needs to get his LT back from me
Na Jaemin: he didn’t make it to class 2day
You: sure!
You: by the way, can you tell Jeno thank you?
Na Jaemin: oh yeah sure
Na Jaemin: he says for what
You: for the profile pic thing
Na Jaemin: oh
Na Jaemin: ur welcome lol
Na Jaemin: for the record I think that’s a pretty cool starfish
You: thanks!
Na Jaemin: oh brbb dinner i see the baemin guy
Na Jaemin: nvm I think that must be your pizza then
Na Jaemin: enjoy!
It’s strange that you have to be constantly reminded that Jaemin only needs to look out his bedroom window to see what’s happening in front of your house, but you don’t really take the time to dwell on this when the doorbell rings and you have to get off your ass to answer it. Once you’ve paid for the food and shut the door, you call out to the rest of your family; you can hear doors opening and closing mixing in with the low thrum of groggy voices. Sooyeon and Chenle, however, have hardly left the kitchen aside from very briefly taking a walk down the block in the middle of your supposed brainstorming session with Renjun, and you find them in almost the exact same way you had left them, only their faces are morphed into these strange expressions that unnervingly remind you of how you sometimes look when you catch your reflection in the mirror as you daydream about Jeno. Except, well, they’re sharing a mutual look, in comparison to you just… fantasizing. You feel kind of intrusive, and Chenle’s smile suddenly shifting from adoring to abashed may have really set the awkward mood, but your sister remains supremely unperturbed, a quality you kind of wish you always had. She looks up at you with the same bright look she’s just shared with Chenle, which isn’t exactly the most comforting thing at present.
Or, maybe, she might just be beaming brightly at the pizza in your hands.
“Oooh, smells great,” she pipes up in a manner that suggests you’ve just slid it out of the oven instead of just dishing out 30,000 won for it. “I’ll get the paper plates.” You share another moment of silence with Chenle, who’s resorted to scratching the back of his neck weakly to alleviate any internal tension he might be feeling, until you remember you’re supposed to play virtual mailman.
“Oh, um — Jaemin says, er —“ you’re momentarily derailed when his wide eyes fix on you. “Jaemin says you need to get your long test back from him.”
“Na Jaemin?” He sounds slightly incredulous. “I didn’t know you guys knew each other.”
“Yeah. He lives next door.”
“I know that. But I didn’t know you were friends.”
“Oh — we’re not.” It’s your turn to scratch the back of your neck. “He just messaged me, I guess to tell you that.”
He hums in thought. “Okay. Thanks for passing the message. I’ll pass by his house before I leave.”
“Okay.” You know it’s not really any of your business, and you’re not dying to know the answer either, but you press on anyway. “Why does he have your LT though? I didn’t know you two were close either.”
“We’re not that close.” Something like a smile passes his face, so briefly that you may have imagined it. His eyes start traveling around again, watching your sister set out plates for everyone as the rest of your family trickles in. “He’s the TA for the class.”
“He’s the huh?”
“The TA — teaching assistant? For the AP Physics class. Didn’t Renjun tell you that? I’m sure he would have mentioned it. He’s been grading our tests for half the year.”
“No, he didn’t,” you can’t take out the surprise in your voice despite the intense desire to. “I didn’t know he was… like…”
“The TA?”
“No, I just… I didn’t know he was smart smart.”
Chenle has laughed in front of you, but you don’t think he’s ever laughed because of you. This feels like a momentous occasion only marred by the fact that your youngest brother is lifting his shirt up gracelessly to rub at his stomach as he yawns. Even still, you feel a little foolish. Not that you’ve ever asked Renjun about it — you’ve sort of felt like AP physics was a world not easily understandable and, thus, a world that you had no interest in actually attempting to understand. More than that, you’ve somehow felt like people on varsity don’t really care that much about academics; you’d always just chalked up not seeing Jaemin in your class as him being in another section of regular physics.
“Jaemin’s popular with the teachers. He’s been in every AP class I’ve been in. His older brother was kind of the same, so he probably has a lot to live up to. So far, he doesn’t seem to be letting anyone down.”
“Yeah…” you have no clue what to contribute to this conversation; you feel like you’re processing so many things the wrong way and in much too slow a pace, so you decide to just let go any desire you have to respond to Chenle and just sit down across him, still a little dumbstruck.
Dinner is uneventful because everyone apart from your sister and your mother look tired, and you feel like the last twelve hours have already taken their toll on your mental capabilities. They’re the only two people talking animatedly; Chenle doesn’t count because he doesn’t converse as much as he does make noises of affirmation when Sooyeon asks for it. You assume that you’re going to be able to go up and maybe actually think about your physics project (with intermittent fantasies about Jeno) in peace, and you almost do. Almost.
“By the way, _____________,” your mom’s mentioning your name brings you out of your stupor. “I have an early day tomorrow, so do you just want me to be the one to return that jacket you had me wash?”
“What?” You say, pretty stupidly.
“I can just pop on over next door and give the jacket back before I leave for work —“
“No,” you cut her off, alarm rising in your voice. “That’s fine; I’ll give it back myself.”
“Are you sure? You sometimes forget to —“
“Mom,” you beg, as your brothers and father, one by one, start falling back down to earth as well and blearily looking up from their pizzas to focus on you. “Please. Just let me handle it. I won’t forget.“
“Okay,” she shrugs, her tone enigmatically sing-song. “I’m just offering.”
“Wait, are you talking about Na Jaemin?” Sooyeon finally cottons on, which had been the uncomfortable start to a situation you were desperately trying to avoid. “He gave you his jacket?”
“He lent it to me.”
“Football players only give their jackets away to girls when they’re dating,” your sister's eyes are shining so terrifyingly, and your dad has actually straightened up his posture to look at you. Even your younger brothers look somehow interested in this development, probably because they can’t remember a time in their short lives where you’d actually had any dating news to share. “Are you dating Na Jaemin?”
For some reason, it’s Chenle’s face that makes you the most uncomfortable; he looks… amused, which isn’t bothersome, but it’s indicative of the questions he must be asking himself, like how could you have not known he was the TA to the AP Physics class when you were sucking face? You put down the crust of your pizza onto your paper plate, the bread having turned to cardboard in your mouth when this horrible conversation had launched.
“I’m not dating him. I’m not dating anyone. And if I did, it wouldn’t be him.”
“Why not? You don’t have to hide anything from us. Jaemin-sunbae is great. Did you actually know my cheerleading coach wanted him on the team because he’s so flexible?”
Jiho makes a gagging noise over her last few words that signals a bite of pizza had gone down the wrong pipe, but everyone ignores him.
“That… is totally not relevant. And a little weird for me to know. Anyway, he spilled coke on me this afternoon and just gave me the jacket to cover up the stain for the rest of the day. It’s no big deal.”
“Oh,” Sooyeon sounds disappointed, but it’s a mystery to you why she would. “That sucks. It would have been pretty cool if we could all go on like, double dates and stuff. And you could finally get dragged to a school football game without me having to do all the heavy lifting in trying to convince you.”
“Pass and super pass.” You fold your paper plate around your crust, standing up and tossing it into the garbage bag your sister had laid out for easy clean up. “I’m going up. I need to figure out the proposal for my term project.”
“I’ll lay out the jacket for you so you don’t forget it,” your mom brings up the same damn topic again, and you just choose to turn a deaf ear to it.
“I can give it to him,” your sister offers. “We practice on the same field.”
“Everyone, please,” you’re the only one standing up, which makes you feel even more like you’re giving a sermon. “Please just stay away from Na Jaemin’s jacket.”
“You don’t have to be possessive of it.”
“Will you shut up?” your sister desists when you emphasize the threatening undertone of your words, but she’s still smiling widely even when you leave the table, and she’s already poised to lean forward to talk to your mom, who looks equally as suspicious and nosy. Birds of a feather.
You make a beeline for the stairs and away from the dinnertime chatter, taking two steps at a time to your room, and your door swings open just in time for you to hear the message notification noise from your laptop, still open and running on 3% on your bed. After saving it from certain death, you lay down stomach-flat in front of it, surprised to see that a new set of messages have invaded your account.
Huang Renjun: home. See you tomorrow
Na Jaemin: also wait is it just me or was Chenle your date to junior prom last year
Na Jaemin: I swear I remember him asking me if I had seen you go into an empty classroom with someone else 
You ignore both open windows, minimizing Renjun’s and closing Jaemin’s entirely, all because a new window, blinking between white and blue, has caught your eye. 
Lee Jeno: hey 
Heat climbs up to your cheeks at an alarming rate, and you can see from the weak reflection of your face on your laptop screen that you’re grinning. Your fingers hover over the keyboard for an intense minute of you thinking about what to reply, and you type out various possible responses ranging from “how’s it going?” to just a single wink emoji, but your brain at least takes control at the last second and lets you type back a similarly casual “hey.” 
Less than two minutes pass, and the three telltale dots appear right next to the minimized version of Jeno’s profile picture. Your breathing catches at the sight of this, and you devour the words that appear in the consequent chat bubble. 
Lee Jeno: how’s the project coming along? 
You: it’s going great!
You: I have some ideas if you feel like discussing them a little 
Lee Jeno: I wouldn’t really know what to discuss
Lee Jeno: anything on that list of ideas that’s going to give me a sure pass in this subject lol 
Okay, so you don’t have ideas. That’s what Renjun was supposed to be here for, but you hadn’t gotten anything done. So far, you had that water thing with the weird name and zilch. 
You: um I guess it kind of depends on what you’re interested in! 
Lee Jeno: physics isn’t my strong suit so I’m letting u take the lead here 
You: okay, how about the Mpemba effect? 
Lee Jeno: which is? 
You:  something to do with water?
Lee Jeno: oh, cool, like swimming? 
You’re shot of ideas already. You don’t even know what it is, and you’re pitching it to meet Jeno’s pretty high expectations, which is just depressing. Quickly reopening your chat with Renjun, you send a panicked message. 
You: RenjNun HELP 
Huang Renjun:  ????
You: Jeno’s asking me for the topic for the term paper and I’ve got NOTHING
You: can you please re-explain the Mpemba effect and how I’m supposed to turn that into a good term project
Read 8:48 PM 
You see the little green dot disappear from beside Renjun’s name, and your heart plummets. Maybe he’s just having dinner really suddenly. Like, life or death, have-to-eat kind of situation. It would make sense, and it’s a lot less painful as an alternative to what could actually be the reason behind him suddenly ghosting on you. 
You: you know what, how about we just talk about the topic tomorrow? You: maybe we can decide then if we really want to do it 
Lee Jeno: oh, okay, sounds good to me
Lee Jeno: lunch tom? 
You: works for me! 
Lee Jeno: cool! see you : ) 
You only realize you’ve been holding your breath for the last part of the conversation when you exhale fiercely, fanning yourself with an open palm. So you’re having lunch with Jeno tomorrow. That’s… cool. More than cool. It’s a big fucking deal. An even stupider grin crosses your face as you roll onto your back, and you pay very little mind to the new message that pops up onto your screen. 
Na Jaemin: if you need any help with your project, don’t hesitate to ask! ^^ 
                                                *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
You’d spent the entirety of the morning really looking forward to your lunch date with Jeno (date being a term you’d added yourself, but it seemed like a reasonable addendum), and you’d been trying to figure out what to pitch to him, even doing a quick Google search of easy term projects right before homeroom. You’d had many expectations for the one glorious hour you’d be eating with him, but in your excitement to get to that point in your day, you’d left out a pretty important factor. 
In your defense, Renjun hadn’t replied all night, so of course you were bound to put him on the back burner, right? Still, it’s common knowledge — tradition, even — between the both of you to spend your lunch break together, and Renjun wasn’t really prepared to suddenly forego this custom today, considering he didn’t know about your more important plans (which, again, was his fault considering he hadn’t bothered to message back). This little snag is the reason why you find yourself sitting next to a sullen best friend who’s more interested in picking out the sesame seeds from atop his gimbap roll than talking to you. 
“It’s not a big deal,” you attempt to get him to see reason again. “It’s just one lunch. You don’t even have to listen! He’s not going to stop you from eating.”
“Not verbally, but his presence will nauseate me so much that I’ll end up without an appetite anyway.”
You have to give it to him — Renjun’s penchant for drama is completely unmatched. Your temper flares a little, but you try to swallow it down to avoid any more huge scenes in the cafeteria. “You’re being stupid.”
“I’m being stupid? Suddenly you can tell when I am but you can’t see it in all of Jeno’s F’s?” 
“Will you stop taking jabs at him? We’re talking about your behavior, not his grades.”
“We barely have any classes together. Lunch time is the only time we really have these days,” Renjun’s voice has a twinge of bitterness to it that’s way too sharp to the ears. “Is it that hard to just meet him when I’m not around?” 
“For the record, I’m not forcing you to stay.”
“Oh, so you’d prefer it if I leave, then,” there’s no denying the sting in his tone. “Okay, that’s how it is.”
“Renjun, come on — of course I don’t want you to leave. Having lunch with you is always great; it’s just one other person for one day.”
“Any other person on multiple other days is fine! But not this person, ________________!”
“I can’t believe how many times I have to keep asking you why you hate him so much!”
“And I can’t believe how many times I have to tell you it’s the fact that you like him that I can’t stand!” 
“Ahem.”
A new voice joins the fray; both of you look up to see Jeno towering over your table, tray in hand and looking fairly confused. His eyes skip between your abashed expression and Renjun’s livid one, but he has the good sense to set his tray down carefully onto the table, choosing to keep his vision fixed on you. 
“We… were going to talk, right?” 
“Yes! Of course — sorry. We were just… chatting.” 
You pointedly ignore the disbelief in Renjun’s face, more relieved at the fact that Jeno at least seems to buy your stupid lie, taking a seat in front of you. He unwraps his sandwich, taking an endearingly large bite and chewing as he looks up at you with that extremely lazy, extremely sexy expression he often gets during class lectures. 
“So,” he starts. 
“So I have this list of possible topics, if you want to take a look at them really quickly before deciding—” You pull out a piece of paper to the tune of Renjun’s scoff. “We can totally go for something else if none of them match your goals.”
“Oh cool,” his mouth is still half-full of ham and white bread as he reaches over and takes the paper, skimming over it with an expression that could, to the untrained eye, be considered somewhat glassy. To you, it simply says casual interest. Very trendy. 
“So what is your goal, Jeno?” Renjun pipes up after ten minutes of uncomfortable silence and Jeno’s attempt to read through your atrocious handwriting, using one of his chopsticks to spear a piece of gimbap viciously. “Graduate somehow without getting anyone pregnant?”
Two pairs of eyes move to Renjun’s mouth, which is opening up a horrendously and unnecessarily huge way to accommodate his food. Your face is much more appalled than Jeno’s is, though, since there’s still a tinge of thoughtful confusion swimming around in his eyes.
“I mean, I haven’t really thought about it that much, but I guess that’s as good a goal as any.”
“I bet it is,” Renjun’s mouth curls up into a horrible smirk. “For you.”
“You know what I was thinking,” you cut him off, and Jeno, thankfully, turns his attention to you, deprived of the time to process Renjun’s comment. “We could try doing that one about the most efficient material to use as sunshade for automobiles since… since you… like cars. Don’t you?” 
“Cars are cool,” he hums nonchalantly. “We could do that.”
“Cars are cool,” Renjun mocks under his breath. You throw him another warning look, which he responds to by devouring another piece of gimbap. 
“If that doesn’t really float your boat, then there’s this one —“ you hesitate in reaching for the paper, but you’re already halfway through the process of leaning in, so you end up with your torso in an awkward horizontal position on the surface of the table. Jeno turns the paper slightly towards you, and you point to an item on the list. “This thing about the relational frequency between notes in harmony sounds pretty interesting too. I think.” 
“Oh, yeah,” he turns the paper back to himself, squinting at the words. “That sounds pretty cool too, actually.”
“How cool?” Renjun butts in again, ignoring you when you punch his thigh under the table, save for a wince that goes as suddenly as it comes. “Like, on a scale of one to ten, ten being as cool as skipping class for the new Fast and Furious movie, and one being as cool as taking advantage of naive girls to do work for you while you half-ass your way through the rest of the year.” 
The silence that ensues is common in all but nature. Renjun’s is a smug silence, while Jeno’s is one of total astonishment. Yours, on the other hand, stems from the rage bubbling in your chest, and it’s taking all of your energy not to blow a fuse. Angry you isn’t cute, and Jeno should never have to see you in a negative light. 
“Actually,” Jeno starts slowly, clearing his throat when his first word comes out a little raspy. “I… just remembered Jaemin and I were supposed to meet at the field at half past noon, so… I gotta go.” 
This is the closest you’ve felt like dying this year, which is saying something, because just yesterday you had had the contents of a coke can spill down your back. You barely manage an “okay” before Jeno gets up, taking his tray with him and walking towards the return corner in long strides. Briefly, you think you should apologize to him, but this thought is derailed by Renjun burping unceremoniously and patting his stomach in satisfaction. 
“Our cafeteria makes the best gimbap. Ever. I said it from day one, and I’ll say it until the day I die.” 
“Well,” you snap your head back towards him, lower lip quivering. “I hope that day comes soon.” 
“Woah,” he lifts his palms up defensively. “I literally asked him, like, two harmless questions. Does that really call for murderous intent?” 
“You insulted him! Your stupid questions were totally uncalled for, and you could have just kept your mouth shut, but you couldn’t even sit fifteen minutes with him and just let us talk about our project?” 
“Oh, right, your project, in the plural,” he rolls his eyes. “The one he’s contributing so much to, right?” 
“We’re bouncing ideas! I’m sorry we can’t be as intelligent as you in your high and mighty advanced placement classes, but we’re doing our best!” 
“Wait – we are doing our best? When are you going to stop talking for him?” His voice is rising now too, and a couple of freshmen sitting at the next table glance back at the both of you in mild interest. “He can’t even defend himself! He knows he’s just taking advantage of you, so why are you still defending him?” 
“Oh, right, of course!” You feign smacking your forehead, except the intensity of your movement actually does cause your palm to make contact, leaving what would be a slightly pink mark just below your hairline. “I forgot! I’m a naive girl that doesn’t know what she’s doing and is just so stupid that she doesn’t even know she’s letting some guy walk on her!” 
“You are letting him walk on you! You’re already busting ass on something he doesn’t even care about!” 
“I know what I’m doing!” You half-yell, slamming down your chopsticks with finality. “You think I don’t know I’m acting like a total fool? You keep making fun of me, telling me I’m stupid for liking him because he’ll never like me back. I get it, okay? I know what you think of him, and I know what you think of me, too.” 
“_____________, that’s not what I meant. I’m just saying you could do —“ 
“Better — yeah, I know! You keep saying that, but all I’m hearing is that you can’t just let me like him, you can’t just let me be happy, you can’t just support me even when this crush isn’t doing anything to you.” Your chair makes an awful scraping noise as you push it back, picking up your tray and ignoring Renjun’s shell-shocked face. “I know I’m acting like a total idiot around him, but I like him. And I know he’s never going to like me back, but I’m happy just liking him like this, and sometimes when you like someone, you’ll do stupid things for them. It’s just a harmless crush. You don’t have to be such a dick about it.” 
He opens his mouth to say something — a retort, or maybe an apology. You don’t feel like hearing either of those things, though, so you spin on your heel before he can utter anything, heading for the return corner first and slamming your tray down on the cart before storming towards the cafeteria door. It swings open just when you’re about to push (probably kick) it open, and you jump back, glaring a little blindly at the person coming through. 
“Woah,” Jaemin keeps the door open, stepping aside so you can pass. “Hey, _________________. I thought you and Jeno were supposed to — are you okay?” 
“I’m fine,” you huff, your voice indicating the total opposite. “Just reconsidering my long-standing relationships.” 
“… Meaning?” 
“Meaning I have a best friend position open right now if you know anyone willing to apply.” 
“Oh,” he looks a little befuddled; his fingers are playing against the bar on the door. “I’ll… keep that in mind, then. Did you and Renjun—?” 
“Who?” 
Jaemin’s mouth is hanging open, possibly at a loss for words at your vicious tone. You breathe in, the inhale shaky as it enters your lungs, and your fingers tremble as you wave the topic of Renjun away. “Sorry. I have to go. Jeno’s probably out on the field looking for you, or whatever.” 
“Oh — thanks,” he still looks flummoxed, but he doesn’t press, and he allows you to walk off in your cloud of anger and embarrassment in silence, his jaw still slightly slack.
                                                *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
You spend the rest of lunch break and your free period crying in the library. You’re not even sure why you’re crying at all; all these horrible emotions overlapped and settled in your chest, and the only logical course of relief seemed to be just to cry next to the non-fiction aisle. In between hiccups, you bring your phone out, drafting messages to Renjun first then Jeno, both in paragraphs, but deleting them after reading them over and finding redundancies and typographical errors, simply allowing the next wave of tears to come streaming down. In the end, you only manage to send one message. 
You: I’m sorry. For snapping at you. You didn’t deserve that. 
Na Jaemin: No apology needed ^^
Na Jaemin: Totally unrelated, of course, but I heard that chamomile tea is good for calming ^^
At the end of the day, you get kicked out of the library for sobbing a little too loudly in the last half hour of your free period, and you just wander aimlessly through the second floor before sluggishly heading down for class. As you approach the classroom, however, the numbness that had replaced your frustration had been pushed aside by a grown dread; knowing that you have to see Jeno, that you have to sit next to him, and that you have to apologize for Renjun’s stupid behavior when you can’t even string two really nice sentences around him is stressing you out, and you walk into the room with your teeth gnawing at the skin around your nail. 
Jeno is already there, a sheen of sweat on his brow, his eyebrows knit together as he stares down at a piece of paper on the table. You shuffle up to him, trying to sniffle very quietly to avoid startling him, and he looks up at all the noise you make, his expression morphing into something that looks… apologetic? 
“Hello,” your voice sounds disgusting, like you had spent the better part of your day stuffing tissues up your nose — which, come to think of it, you kind of had. 
“Hey,” his response is careful, and it doesn’t invite any more immediate discussion, so you sit down, and he turns his attention back to the paper. Out of the corner of your eye, you see that it’s the list of topics you’d written down. His long fingers tap between a couple of lines idly. 
You don’t know why, but this somehow is… comforting. Couple that with the fact that he now keeps stealing glances at you, like he’s trying to figure out how to open another conversation at the right time. 
“Um…” he lifts his head up at the sound of your voice. “Jeno, I just —“ 
“I’m sorry,” he cuts you off suddenly, and his voice bursts like he’s been holding it in for the longest time. You’re perplexed, to say the least; was he trying to fill in the blanks for you, or something? This theory is just debunked when he plows on. “I’m sorry, _________________. I didn’t really —“ 
“Wait,” you had never imagined you would find yourself stopping him from talking, considering how much you liked listening to him talk, but you feel like the need to clarify the situation is more pressing at the moment. “Wait, why are you apologizing? I was supposed to apologize.”
“What for?” He looks genuinely shocked, and your hands make random gestures to the abstract past. 
“For — for what happened! During lunch!” 
“That’s what I was going to apologize for. That was just… it was terrible. I’m sorry.” 
“I know it was, but that’s why I was apologizing,” you feel like you’re missing something totally fundamental considering that Jeno’s face is just growing more confused by the second.
“You were the one that had to sit through that mess.” 
“Me? No, I’m — it’s not about me,” his brows lift in disbelief. “I mean… your friend said some pretty wild stuff, but —“ 
“Yeah, so I’m — sorry, are we even talking about the same thing��-?” 
“I’m saying sorry because —“ he inhales, a hand coming up to knead at his temple briefly. Oh, good. He’s having a similarly hard time understanding this, too. “Because you didn’t have to go through that. That was humiliating.” 
“For you, yeah, I’m sure —“ 
“But also,” Jeno raises a hand, silencing you. “Because your friend — despite all the shitty things he said, he was right.“ 
“What… do you mean?” 
His hand touches his lips, fingers skating across his lower one as if it’s trying to will the right words to come out faster. “I… I mean, I told you. I’m not good at this physics stuff. And I just don’t have the brain power to get this done. So I really was kind of hoping you’d… you know. Do it. With as little help from me as possible preferably. I’m not proud of this,” he adds quickly. “I’m just really used to skating by. And I kind of knew you would let me, anyway. And I’m sorry for thinking of you that way. I deserved that call out.” 
He looks so terribly hurt that you can’t imagine what other emotion you’re supposed to feel apart from sympathy. “It’s okay, Jeno.” 
“That’s the thing; it’s really not. I’m not supposed to be taking advantage of other people like this. Especially not someone like you.” 
Someone like you? You’re quickly going through all the possibilities of what that implies, so much so that you miss the moment in which Jeno leans a little closer to you. You come back down to earth to see him a lot more clearly than you had a second or two ago. 
“Can I make it up to you?” 
“Can you h-hu-h—“ you blubber, collecting yourself at the last second. “Make it up to me?” 
“I’m never going to be of any real help in this project, so it’d be unrealistic if I told you I’d pull equal weight. But I’ll do what I can, if and when you need me to,” he slips the paper of topics back to you. Vaguely, you notice he’s circled a topic in blue pen. 
“That’s… I’m fine with that.” 
“In exchange for you taking the reins on this one,” he taps the paper. “I’ll make sure you graduate as the coolest girl on campus. Deal?”
119 notes · View notes
sainzofthecentury · 3 years ago
Text
Game Texts 1/20/22 Bruins - Caps
not fucking this again
literally FUCK ESPN YOURE MOT A HOME CAST
not the t*m w*ls*n praise 🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮
DID WILSON FUCKING STRIKE AGAIN
He said “that was a beautiful hit”
ARE WE PLAYING THE NO CALL GAME AGAIN
WhT were they chanting?
fuck tom wilson
OH MY FUCKING GOD ESPN JUST SUCK WILSON’S DICK ALREADY WE ALL KNOW YOU WANT TO
You ain’t wrong tho
You just said it with ✨passion✨
Who do we think would fight Wilson
cheeks or cc tbh
and bambi doesn’t fight even tho i’d LOVE to see him take his revenge
I miss Thornton
i miss quaider
quaider woulda had him in PIECES
the way this guy says haula’s name pisses me off
DAMN
CHEEKS
I FUCKIN LOVE YOU
okay so in the locker room bruce definitely just asked for volunteers to fight wilson and at least 7 guys raised their hands
cheeks is one of them and his hand was the first up
also mark messier looks like somebody who drives a windowless white van through school zones
i’m gonna have to sage after this game
dude imagine what jack woulda said
he channels our anger well
can blondie stfu i’m losing brain cells
espn might as well make one of those stupid edits with the hearts for the caps
i mean tuukkas still cleaning the shit outta his pants from tuesday so
FUCK YOU HATHAWAY
OHHHHHH WE RIDE AT FUCKING DAWN LETS GO BURN DC
The ppl talking “that’s when you know a player is hurt when he comes off the ice during a power play” and the other guy laughed ?????
CAPITALS FANS GET THE FUCK OUTTA MY CITY
I would rather eat dirt every morning than be a capitals fan
He just mad his real name is Thomas
no blood what a pussy
don’t call him taylor asshole
FUCK YEAH
“puck got skinny” u wish u could do the same
Pasta literally just stroked his head
into the ford f-150 final five
PENALTY ON WASH LFG
YES
CHEEKS
WAT A FUCKIN BEAUTY
SIR. CHARLES.
ugh i’m tearing up
4 notes · View notes
yikeswtfmate · 5 years ago
Text
(1) New Message from Unknown Number
main masterlist // (1) New Message Masterlist // next part
Summary: Y/N is drunk and can’t remember her ex’s number.
A/N: Hello, it is I, the idiot who writes Social Media AUs when she’s drunk but is too lazy to put them in the proper format and just leaves them to die somewhere on her laptop
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader (Social Media AU - that’s a lie, it’s actually just texts in Word format 🤡)
Warnings: swearing, dumbassery
Tumblr media
Unknown Number: Hey asshat so listen
Unknown Number: I kno we hvnt spoken since like
Unknown Number: High school but whateve idc
Unknown Number: U’re an asshle so I dnt even care that its like…
Unknown Number: 3 in the morning nvrmd
Unknown Number: Ive ben dared to txt my hottest ex by these evil witchS so
Unknown Number: Here u go
Unknown Number: At least u had decent abs so congrats on tht jfc
Unknown Number:  also u dnt get to complain abt this txt bc like
Unknown Number: u dated me for 6 months on a dare so U KNOW WHat this shuold feel like ya
Unknown Number: Wow dude that sounds like a dick move
Unknown Number: Seriously who the hell dates someone for 6 months on a dare?
Unknown Number: Doesn’t that only happen in movies though?
Unknown Number: hey bitchass dont act like u don’t kno what im talkinG abt
Unknown Number: Oh shit yeah, sorry. I don’t know who this asshole of an ex is but I sure as hell am not him
Unknown Number: Dude sounds like a complete waste of human space
Unknown Number: And I think I wouldn’t get to live it down if my friends would hear I did something that shitty
Unknown Number: Wait lemme ask Sam
Unknown Number: Nah, he says Steve would’ve beaten my ass if I were to do that so there u go
Unknown Number: m sorry who tf are u
Unknown Number: Bucky
Unknown Number: what kind of stupid name is bucky
Unknown Number: Shit man, u’re the one blowing up my phone at 3 in the morning, sending me weird ass messages when I don’t even know u and u dare say my name is stupid???
Unknown Number: Sheit srry
Unknown Number: Is been A long night
Unknown Number: nd week
Unknown Number: Actlly make thAt the whle entire fuckin month
Girl with asshole ex: Srry fr bothering u
Unknown Number: It‘s cool
Girl with asshole ex: Hey the witches ask if ure hot
Bonky: Yeah
Girl with asshole ex: WHAT THE FCK MAN AT LEST BE A LIL BIT HUMBLE SMH
Bonky: U wanted me to lie?
Girl with asshole ex: Fair point
Girl with asshole ex: They wnt a pic
Girl with asshole ex: Pic or it didn’t happen punk
Girl with asshole ex: Tht was nat
Bonky: What kind of party are u at that you can constantly text me?
Girl with asshole ex: Wanda’s place
Girl with asshole ex: Girls night
Girl with asshole ex: Getting hammered on wine BITCH
Girl with asshole ex: Also dnt change the subject
Bonky: I don’t even know your name
Girl with asshole ex: Why would I tell u my name I just want to see a suppsdly hot asssd
Bonky: You know mine and now you want me to send u a pic of me
Bonky: Bit of a disadvantage here babe
Girl with asshole ex: Babe?
Girl with asshole ex: BABE?
Girl with asshole ex: Fine
Girl with asshole ex: BABE if I tell u my name will u send a pic of u so we kno u arnt a 60yr old perv
Bonky: I’ll think about it
Girl with asshole ex: Hey fuck u
Girl with asshole ex: Not fair
Bonky: How do I know you’re not the 60yr old perv?
Girl with asshole ex: Cuz she got big tiddies to prove
Girl with asshole ex: And that was wanda
Girl with asshole ex: So now u know my fridsn
Bonky: Still don’t know your name tho babe
Bonky: Also tell Wanda she shouldn’t give out this type of info to strangers
Girl with asshole ex: ure not a stranger anymore bonky
Girl with asshole ex: ure my babe nao
Bonky: I’m going to let that Bonky slide just bc u’re cute
Bonky: But I’m also going to stop replying until you tell me your name
Girl with asshole ex: U think im cute?
Girl with asshole ex: 
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Girl with asshole ex: I mean u havnt even seen me but thats fair
Girl with asshole ex: Wand and nat say its true so ill believe u rnt lying to me rn
Girl with asshole ex: But I wanna see if ure cute
Girl with asshole ex: Wait why r u up st 3 in the mrng I mean we re drunk but wht r u doing
Girl with asshole ex: Babe u need to take better care of urself
Girl with asshole ex: Babe
Girl with asshole ex: Babe?
Girl with asshole ex: BABE?
Girl with asshole ex: Ph shit ure actually ignoring me
Girl with asshole ex: I dont like this
Girl with asshole ex: I actually like talking to u
Girl with asshole ex: Pls stop ignoring me
Girl with asshole ex: COME BACK AND LOBE ME
Girl with asshole ex: Babe?
Girl with asshole ex: Fine
Girl with asshole ex: It’s Y/N
Bonky: Now, that wasn’t so hard was it? 
Babe: fcuk u
Bonky: I’m up at 3 bc we ordered pizza and decided it’s time to beat Sam’s ass in Mario Kart once and for all
Babe: Nd how’s that going for ya?
Bonky: Bitch has been beating us for the past 3 hours
Bonky: Thor is the only one getting at least close to him now so we’re about to give up
Babe: Wait shit how r u replying so fast if ure playing Mario kart tho
Bonky: I gave up two hours ago
Babe: Quitter
Bonky: Just gotta know which fights to pick babe
Babe: Heads up I might be fallin asleep soon
Bonky: Drink some water before that, maybe get some food in u as well to soak up all the alcohol and have an advil close for tomorrow
Babe: Ok MOM
Bonky: Hey Wanda willingly told me you have “big tiddies” so your friends don’t seem to be doing a good job of taking care of you
Bonky: Might as well let me do it so you don’t die tmrw
Babe: Ohhhh so u careeeee babe im touched
Babe: Kkkkkk Ill talk tu u tmrw ill be dead soon
Babe: Nd I do have big tiddies
Bonky: Good night babe
*
Babe: What the shit
Bonky: I see you survived
Babe: Barely
Babe: My head might explode soon and I feel like I’ve vomited for an entire lifetime
Babe: TMI sorry
Bonky: I’d like to point out I’m glad I don’t have to decipher your texts anymore and that you can actually spell properly
Babe: Fuck you Buckaroo
Bonky: I would also like to remind you that I have on good authority that you have “big tiddies” so don’t make me use that against you
Babe: I am going to kill Wanda
Babe:Ugh I need coffee
Babe: I’ll talk to you later
Bonky: I’ll be waiting for you babe
*
Babe: So
Babe: BABE
Bonky: Yes baby?
Babe: 
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Bonky: Nah, you love it
Babe: Fine
Babe: You still haven’t sent a pic of you though. I might be able to rise Nat and Wanda from the dead if you do
Bonky: What do I get in return?
Babe: The promise that I will keep replying even though you might turn out to be an ugly orc?
Bonky: Not enough
Babe: Fine. I’ll keep talking to you until you want me to stop. Or until I get bored of you
Bonky: Eh, you can do better
Babe: What do you WANT?
Bonky: A pic of you in return
Babe: I’m not sending you nudes, perv
Bonky: If I wanted to see you naked and be a dick about it, I could’ve asked last night, don’t worry
Bonky: But if you’ll know how I look it’s only fair I should know how you look
Babe: That sounds reasonable
Bonky: I’d say it’s a fair exchange
Babe: Fine, you first then
Bonky: If you don’t send me a pic of you afterwards babe I will stop replying, just so you know
Bonky:
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Babe: Did you type super hot guy with the most beautiful eyes in the world in Google or something?
Bonky: I’m touched but no. Sam took that photo at a work event
Babe: Bitch do you really expect me to believe this is you? That looks like a guy who just stepped out of a magazine, I highly doubt I would have the luck to text him instead of my ex when drunk
Bonky:
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Bonky: Are you always this annoying?
Babe: …
Bonky: What? Do you want me to take a selfie with the fucking newspaper now? I read the news online babe, I’m not getting off of this couch just so I can buy a stupid newspaper to prove it’s me
Babe: Do you have one in a suit?
Bonky: …why am I putting up with this?
Bonky: Hold on
Bonky:
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Bonky: It’s been 5 minutes, are you going to reply?
Bonky: You still have to send me a picture of you though, a deal is a deal you know
Bonky: Fine, I warned you
Babe: Shit sorry
Babe: Hi Bucky, this is Natasha
Bonky: Hi Natasha. Is Y/N alright?
Babe: Uhm how should I put this?
Babe: Y/N is crying right now and she can’t reply herself
Bonky: What? What happened? Is she okay?
Babe: Oh yeah
Babe: She’s just crying because (and I’m quoting here) you’re “so beautiful, it’s like all my wet dreams and fantasies have come together. I swear this is some cosmic joke, this is not happening”
Babe: I’m not sure if she’s laughing or crying now
Babe: But she keeps yelling at me that I have to send you the most perfect picture of herself that has ever existed or you will stop talking to her
Babe: I think she started crying again because “I will never live up to that level of perfection, he told me that I have to know which fights to pick”
Babe: Uh yeah so here
Babe: 1 Photo Attached
Bonky: Hey Nat, could you tell Y/N that I would like to talk to her now?
Babe: Sure
Babe: Hey
Bonky: Baby?
Babe: Yeah?
Bonky: You picked the wrong fight if you think “you will never live up to this level of perfection”
Babe: Oh God
Bonky: Stop being an idiot
Bonky: And listen to me
Bonky: I would really like to keep talking to you. Mainly because you’re an idiot who makes me laugh, but it’s also the fact that you are the most gorgeous woman I have ever seen in my entire life
Babe:
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624 notes · View notes
itsalreadybroken · 6 years ago
Text
The way it all began - ONE SHOT
Summary: You were about to prepare yourself for your 3rd year anniversary with Chris Evans as a couple and you remember the day you met him and how slowly you fell for him.
A/N: I know this isn't Queen's but I also love the Avengers likeeeeee a lot (stupid 13 yo voice in  my head right now) and also with a huge crush on Captain America because... HAVE YOU SEEN HIM?!
Just a bit much of fluff right now, because I'm in no mood for drama. Hope you like it!!
Word counting: 2720
~~~
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There you were, talking non-stop about Marvel's latest movie and your bestie couldn't hear you for another second. You were babbling something about being able to meet the Avengers and she was yet so bored. Julia cared about make-up, music, dancing. You soon realised you had no rythm or whatsoever so the only dance you could do was the one you do when you had a few more beers and didn't really cared about who saw you dance.
"But you see if I meet Captain America and he asks me to dance, I won't be able to accept unless I make a total fool of myself" your eyes layed on Julia and she laughed.
"I cannot believe you would be that bad... I have been trying to teach you a few steps... And why not Thor? Have you SEEN those biceps?" you nodded thinking it might be another good guy to date but Evan's and his ass were something.
You both went to a coffee shop and posters were everywheere about the movie, Julia grabbed her phone and called her boyfriend while you were left looking at the menu even though you knew wht you were going to order, the menu never changed, it had been the same since you were twelve.
A guy looked at you and you smiled back, but in a few seconds you looked at him again, and again and again and you tried to hold it instead you kicked Julia on hher ankle and she screamed.
"OUCH!!"
"Shhh!" you orderedd "Keep it down"
"I'll keep it down the moment you stop kicking me!"
"Calmly look at your left! It's Captain America!!!!!!" she could barely hear you so she kept looking everywhere making you feel so uncomfortable when Chris looked at you two again. He was wearing a hat and a jacket to not be so easily recognized but you discovered him anyway.
"No way, that cannot be..." but your friend knew. She knew it was him and she bit her lip."You have to go there!"
"No way!! I can't, I'll look stupid" you blushed and looked at the table.
The waiter came to take your orders and Julia quickly rushed on saying both of your orders so the waiter would go away.
"Y/N listen to me, you already look stupid by avoiding looking to a guy ho has nicely smiled at you at least twice. Soooo it's your guy! Go there... If it goes bad at least you'll have a selfie to prove everyone you met him"
You roolled your eyes and pressed your lips together, should you go there? Was it a good option? What would you say?
"Go! Ask for an autograph and then we can sell it and be totally rich!" she mocked you and you took a deep breath.
This was the opportunity of a lifetime. Even if you could have a picture with him tomorrow, it wouldn't be the same. Hundreds of fans, girls fangirling over the guys...
Okay, this was your shot.... This was your moment. You were going to meet your Captain, your hero. And when you got up and kept walking towards him you stumbled on something and regained balance almost hitting the floor and everyone saw it. He saw it and Julia was trying to not get ice tea out of her nostrils.
Chris got up really fast trying to help you and grabbed your shoulder "Are you alright?" he asked looking at you while having a smile forming in the corner of his mouth.
"I'm... I'm alright thanks.." you trembled on your own words and smiled "I was just going to ask you to take a selfie"
He chuckled "Of course!" he quickly replied "I'm Chris Evans by the way... But you already kow that" he hesitated and laughed.
"It's no biggie, I'm Y/N!" jeez why were you so nervous? Who the hell still used the words no biggie, you apparently.
"Nice to meet you!" he added while you ere both sitting on his booth "and nice shirt" he commented and you looked down. That's why he was looking at you, you were wearing a shirt with a drawing of Thor on it.
"Oh... Yeah, It's Thor. My friend gave it to me last Christmas" you shrugged and started looking for your phone "I just need to grab my phone I left it there" you pointed at your table where Julia was already eating her meal.
"No biggie, Mine's right here!" he picked it up and opened the camera.
So were you just having a dream or did you really just took a selfie with Chris Evans and his gorgeous smile?
He sent you the photos to your instagram. You and Julia were looking at them after he had left the diner "To a Thor's fan :)" he had wrote that on one of the messages and you were simply amazed by all that.
"So you didn't told him he was your favourite?" Julia rushed on saying and kept lookin to your phone like he would text something more.
"Of course not, 'm wearing a Thor's shirt and I'm also using "no biggie" as an expression... I mean..." Your best friend laughed and then looked at the window.
"You're being and idiot, the guy totally smiled at you and he was flirting"
3 months later
You worked at a catering service, you loved cooking and this was the closest you could get on getting people to know your dishes... You mostly were serving the entrees, but once in a while the main chef asked you to cook one of your specials... This one you got to make your special shrimp soup. This event was for some fancy couple you lived on the rich part of the town. You were about to get a new tray of food when you heard your name being called.
Looking up you recognized the smile "Chris?! I mean, Mr. Evans" you almost dropped the tray but he help you while laughing.
"Chris is fine" he said and you felt your cheeks going pink.
"I can't, must be totally professional" you gave him a shy smile.
"You never replied me" he said but then looking embarassed "I mean... You didn't thanked... For the photos".
"Oh" you kept looking at him for a full minute "Oh yeah you know... I mean... What would I say?" you asked biting your lip trying to look very calm
"I don't know, maybe a thank you or something" he gave you a concerned look.
"Yeah I know I should.... But this way I got to be the girl who never replied to Chris Evan" you winked at him and made a quick run to grab the tray of food you were already supposed to be serving.
3 months and a fewer hours later
You were leaving the Aniston's residence when you heard it again "Y/N!". You turned around to see Chris in a tux but with his shrit slighty unbottuned Delicious! You thought to yourself and smiled "So... Can I buy you a drink now?" he asked.
"Yeah sure, why not?" you instantly replied and shrugged your arms.
"Dammit, had a whole speech prepared in case you had said no" he laughed and mocked you "So let me be a gentleman, a smile crossed his lips and he opened the car door for you.
You went to a bar that wasn't that much crowded and the music was nice, some blues, a bit jazz, a bit 80's... Leaving you wondering what could be up next.
Chris and you sat on a booth and ordered a beer and a cosmopolitan.
"Usally the beer kind of girl, but since you're paying it and I am 'oh so exhausted', I need this!" you shyly smiled and he was looking directly at you.
"You have the nicest smile I have ever seen" he added coming out of nowhere to your conversation and you felt yourself blushing... A lot!
"Woah there Evans, daddy did not raise a fool! Men always say that kind of stuff when they want to pick up women"
"You know I could pick almost anyone I wanted" he winked and smirked at you.
"Nice way to get into someone panties" you laughed when your drinks arrived.
5 cosmopolitans and 7 beers later he did got into your panties.
7 months later
You woke up and Chris was still sleeping, one arm around your waist and one leg between yours. You turned around looking at him and started to kiss his jawline, followed by his neck and then his chest. When you looked at him, he had a smile, eyes still closed but suddenly "I love you Y/N" he spoke silently but you both felt a bit scared from the moment. He immediatly opened his eyes and kept an uncomfortable look, so did you, while sitting on this lap.
"You love me?" you babbled almost not sure if he understood you.
He ran a hand to his hair and pressed his lips "You know what? I do, I do love you and I was eager to say this to you at least for a month!"
"You have been loving me for a whole mont?" you asked still amazed and blinking so fast.
He grabbed your hands and kissed them both "I'm so sorry if that was too soon" he started to kiss your elbow when you got the courage to speak again.
"I think I love you too Chris..." your breath was wavy, you were feeling yourself getting turned on and the man was not stopping "For a few days, you have been the one I want to wake up next to"
He kissed your lips and after that was all bliss.
2 years and one month later
You were blindfolded, it was your birthday and you have been married to Chris for a year now. It had been the best year of your life so far. You got to meet Chris Hemsworth and took a bunch of pictures with him, while Evans got a bit cute jealous. Hemsworth was not going for much less while grabbing you and kissing your cheek.
"Where are we going?" you asked for the millionth time.
"Just wait and see." it was 3pm on the afternoon so you had no idea where he took you.
The car stopped and Chris helped you get out of the car.
You entered some place and a few minutes later he took you the blind fold off.
"Where are we?" you asked. It seemed a restaurant but it was closed... Well for the looks of it, it had been closed for a while.
"Your gift" he said while grabbing your hand "You always wanted your own place right? To be a chef and all that..." the tears reached your eyes.
"I did love, but.. IT's too much Chris, it's lovely, but it's too much.. I can't" a huge smile reached your lips.
"Think of it as a partnership, you couldn't invest in it, I could... So... we'll split the earnings"
You nodded in afirmation because you couldn't just talk... He was so perfect that you still didn't believe that guy could ever fell for you, but he did. He fucking did.
You laughed and kissed him, trying not to laugh, you were so happy, you were so in love.
"I fucking love you Captain America, you saved my world" he laughed and kissed your cheek.
"Watch your mouth young lady".
Present
You were sitting in the toilet, looking at the pregnacy test Positive you thought... You had agreed to try and have a baby, you just weren't expecting to happen so soon... Divided between getting ready for dinner and telling Chris, your mind wondered... Happywas how you felt, but either way you were pretty nervous, were you going to be a good mom? Will the baby like you?
Standing up and looking yourself in the mirror, your tummy still looked the same... You should hae known better when your period was late the first week.. Sometimes it happened but not three weeks, never three weeks.
An hour later Chris arrived home, he really had to get some shooting done today for a movie and you spent the whole morning together, it didn't matter really, you loved him, he loved you... Was a special day, but it was his work and you also had to check the restaurant to be sure the staff didn't need anything.
"You look... Astonishing!" you said looking at him in some new suit and drooling all over... How could you been married for three years and the man still made your hormones feel like you were a fifteen year old teen.
"You don't look that bad yourself Mrs. Evans" he laughed and grabbed your waist, pulling you closer to him and kissing you so very deeply. "I knew that red dress would be the death of me" you both laughed and he was looking into your eyes "What's happening, what's wrong? Look I'm sorry I had to..."
You pressed a finger to his lips "Shhh silly, it's not that. I'm so happy we're together. I can't believe I never get bored of you. Sometimes I need my little space and privacy but at the end of the day I love the feeling of you holding me" he kissed your forehead.
"Ready to let me rock your world?" he asked grabbing the car keys and pening the door.
"Couldn't think of it any other way" you said while grabbing your purse.
He had taken you to a pretty fancy reastaurant near the river and was a couples only restaurant, no kids, no families, just couples... In love.
After ordering you were looking toall the people standing there, you weren't even sure but on a table you thought you had seen George Clooney.
"So... You like it?" he gazed at you and you smiled.
"Our's is better buuuut this oone is fine" you grabbed his hand "I love it Chris, it's perfect" he caressed your hand with his tumb "But I do have one thing I gotta tell you and I have 0 idea how you might respond to it"
"What's happening?" he was concerned looking at you thinking what could have he done wrong. You quickly grabbed your purse, hands trembling a bit and you handed him your pregnancy test on a napkin "What's this...?" he asked while unfloding it "It's this..." words ran out of his mouth and you nodded.
"Yes, yes it is... Found out today because I was running a few days late... Okay weeks and I wasn't sure"
He quickly left himself up and kneeled next to you, touching your belly "Baby, it's too soon to feel the little bean we made" you laughed, some people were looking but he didn't care, he was just so happy "I know we have been trying, I never thought this would happen so fast" you added.
"I don't care love, I already love this baby more than anything"
You had just finished your dessert when the band made an annoucement "This one is for Mrs. Evans, your husband wants to tell the world you are the only thing that matters to him, and if he ever forgets to tell you that, you are more than allowed to make him sleep of the couch" the whole restaurant laughed and Can't Help Falling in Love of Elvis Presley started to play.
"You know...." his voice was no more than a whisper "Now there are two things that matter to me more than anything. You and that precious baby that hasn't even born yet and has to parents that love it more than theirs lifes" you kissed him and got up.
"We have to slow dance this" you murmured "I don't care how ridiculous we might look"
He got up and pull in in for a slow dance "You know, there's no way you could be more ridiculous than the day I met you. Believe me, I thank Julia everyday for that,was no biggie" he kissed you and deep in your soul you wish it had never ended.
187 notes · View notes
mingi-bubu · 5 years ago
Text
Watch “Love O2O” with Me!
Episode 7
i am watching these episodes the way that i eat m&ms
one after the other xp
my phone has cooled off v much but is not yet fully charged so shes still plugged in
i have my water, i have some ramen ^-^, the flix of net is up
as mark lee would say, lezgeddit
so we left off with september and mirror fish duking it out for who should be considered the woman in the faux relationship tht theyre only doing so that xiao nai and wei2 can practice dueling before the big event
and we open with them figting in game
wei2 and nai are just watching them off to the side lmao
THEY JSUT TOOK EACH OTHER OUT ADKJFALKSDJ
wait did nai take them out?
oh damn
they at the hard level couple shit huh
aldkfjalskdjf drag your friends lovingly
maybe not so lovingly
hes too fuking head over heels for her imHAND HOLDING
IN MY GOOD CHRISTIAN SERVER
DISGUSTING
i want it
oooh this npc’s outfit fucking sLAPS
no other in game couple has completed the quest before
damn she just got stuck in a dungeon and the disembodied voice said y’all ain’t got shit but also only have 16 hours to find each other
oh they can still chat
thats nice
why is she acting so dramatic smh
shes so upset she cant do anything
oh no instead shes gonna try to find out information for him
also i LOVE HER SWEATSHIRT
oooh rainbow
he really gonna YEET himself off that cliff aint he
~telepathy~
he’s confident apparently
i
she’s cleaning her keyboard
akdlfjak;ldsj
she said its STUDYING TIME COWARDS
love this man’s headpiece
i cant help but think about the one vine where the guy kept skipping the in game diaogue alkdfaskl
ohhhh
the game is called go
the one that we saw nai playing when we were first introduced to him
oh ok
the game disappeared
yearning formation
me while watching this fuckign show
take the scroll
smh
Y E E T
oh
booooooo
OH I TAKE IT BACK THEYRE STAIRS
THATS PRETTY DOPE
STONE DRAGONS
STONE DRAGONS
HOLY SHIT
well thats unfortunate
shut up i hate this part so muchh
oh he just killed the stone dragons
god this guy is so fucking overdramatic
the naihands again
not at how the fucking music popped off
damn this npc guy is cope
dope
not to be like harry potter but harry potter battle
oh jesus thats wht it takes
really
showing him the pendant
man got his heart broken 1 time by his master and said fuck it i hate everyone
nevermind he texted back
oh wowowowow oHES RIDING THE BIG FUCKING BIRD
Jesus she really said he looks like an angel huh
me too
wowowwowowowwoOWOWOW
ultimate fucking team
they really said we are the best huh
ia;lkdfja;lksdj
it’s not that deep
I LOVE HIM
HE REALLY SAID BITCH I SCREENSHOT THAT SHIT
KING SHIT
oh she left her clan?
damn she is bringing in everything
all the shade
all the tea
this is very awkward
he really backtracked faster than i could blink
oooohhhhhhh
this is tea
DAMN WEIWEI REALLY OUT HERE TO SAY THINGS
these girls again
oh she really do be leaving the clan
oh wowowowow
eww thats so gross and mushy
we were formally married
shut the fuck
marital status is important
SHTU THD UVLK
how long did that quest take them tho
did
did she just do what i think she did
ugh gross theses and exams
not excited to go back to that
xiaoling i want more of her shes so funny
oh so it’s septembers meeting with mr. li
e.e
me and september rolling our eyes internally
hmmmmm
mr li is gonna kill him
wHy DoNt YoU dEvElOp ThE gAmE wItH uS
stop pitting two bad bitches against each other
aaaannnnd now hes being more obviuosly snakey
monthly wage of 120k
god i wish that were me
smart kid tho
said he needs to think about it
raise that by 30%???
156,000
a month
before bonuses
and the game launching
god i need to marry rich
sorry
anyways
yiran uncle is like we need to get him on board bc then everyone else will come
snake man
yiran heard all of that
*eyes emoji*
maybe she do have a heart
she really needs to have better people in her life
her uncle is skeezy
i’d spill hot tea on him
i absolutely don’t believe in nor trust him
go and tell him
be a moral person
her hair style is cute
TELL HIM
ugh
this is why aint nobody know anything
nana that is not how this should work
stop it
stop that nana
THATS NOT HOW THAT WORKS
SOMETIMES PEOPLE HAVE OTHER INTERESTS
i will say tho that her underlying message of taking initiative and doing things to help you is good
also the background is so green screen aldkjfs
september i would marry you in that outfit rigt how
nai’s apartment i want to know more aobutFISHHH
THERE ARE SO MANY FISHHH
why does he have a phonograph im so weak
all of these guys need lkasdjfa;lksdjf;laksjd
nai is the love of my life
but anyways the other 3 guys need to think with their upstairs brain
gynophobic
jjaiskldfjwe just say gay
i know they probably have censorship laws that are different
but still
i desire kodak’s hoodie
theres a lil bear in a cap on it
cute cute cute
oh damn he really do be saying things
oh so they visited SEPTEMBER EREALLY  DID THE FINGER HEARTS IM IN LOVE IWTH HIM
damn HE IS
RIDE
OR
DIE
FOR HIS FRIENDS
alkdsfjalskdjfasl;dk not at how he was really cute looking all dorky when he was being all sweet to them
awww weiwei’s relationship with xiaoyang is adrable
al;kdsjfalsd don’t steal unless youve been falsely accused
oooh it was a bear with wings
xiaoyang is my favorite character every episode he’s in is improved tenfold
i have a similar knife as the one in this show love that for me
wh
what did she put in the bowl and why did the yakult have to go in it too
xiaoyang i would die for you
the #Squad
love them
SPARKLY SHIRT ON HIM
SARPIOEAPOIWEHFIO
ASPAEIHFALKLY SHRIT
IM LLIVOE HIM
D A M N
HE REALLY BE BUYING SHIT FO RHER
PELASE
september in clgaseselkew;jrfawioh
and dark oragne
im falignaeapowifha
i love them
jadlskfjasldkj ha;weijak
I LOVE THAT
she really changed her mf tune as soon as she found out nai put them up to it
ugh
WHEN DO WE GET TO SEE IRL INTERACIONS IM SICK OF THIS SHIT
not really i depely love it obviously
BUT IM SICK OF THIS SHIT
ok that’s the end of episode 7
ugh
truly they are otp
anyways
thank you for readign!!!
stay safe and stay healthy <333
2 notes · View notes
chanteya · 6 years ago
Text
Dark Nights NSFW Headcanons - Zeikun
NSFW Headcanons for Dark Nights - Zeikun
Welcome to my ted talk (xD) There i will let my imagination go out with this Zeikun headcanons which are clearly what i think would suit him but welp thats my opinion everyone else can think otherwise (shrug). Anyway hope you will enjoy it anyway xD
A- Z thing doesnt belong to me. I also allowed myself to not answer on some letters due of me lacking the ideas on few of them. Also for sake of this HC’s im using female form when talking about S/O
A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex) - Oh boy. - This guy and aftercare…. - Gentle touches - Definitely would swoop S/O in his arms and cuddle with her. Bear hugs and a lot of affection and protectiveness kicking in. - Soft kisses on S/O shoulder/neck/nape and not only - If that was messy, he would help S/O clean up. - Loving bath? - Overprotectiveness kicking in overall. Hes loving boyfriend/husband.
B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s) - His favourite part of his body? Who knows? - His favourite part of S/O body? Guess. :P
C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person) I am not this disgusting to talk about cum. Sorry.
D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs) - He secretly loves when S/O touches his horns, but he never told about it to anyone. - Secretly loves the moments when his S/O tries to show a tiny bit of dominance even if she fails he still likes the tries.
E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?) - If he wouldnt be a demon i would say hes inexperienced, but he is demon… he lives for looong time even if in forest who the hell knows what he was doing sometimes. - I doubt highly he is inexperienced so i would say he has some kind of experiences on NSFW topic~ - You know. Demons may have knowledge on this stuff from birth ;)
F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual) Who knows. ;) (Im not that experienced to know the position names or how to describe them so everyone will get what i mean :p)
G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc) - Heh. Depends. - Jealous? or maybe something risky happened? Oh well… He will be serious. - Normally i doubt he would be serious except situations that i wrote up~ - He would be a tiny bit silly, straight-forward with some stuff- - T e a s e~
H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.) Does he even know he need to groom his hair there? Better question Does he even has hair there? X to doubt :O
I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…) - Veeeeery intimating ;)
J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon) - Zeikun and Jacking off, piss off not his thinghe prefers to do it with S/O than try satisfy himself with mere hand x)
K = Kink (One or more of their kinks) - He likes when you pull him by his collar - Honestly i can imagine him developing master - maid kink. - Edging (Not allowing S/O to come until he will say she can cum ;P More might be added later ;0 - Sense deprivation (handcuffs, blindfolds)
L = Location (Favourite places to do the do) - Obviously Forest ;) Eventually in S/O house if they dont want to be seen
M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going) - Soft kisses on his neck (in places where S/O actually can place them and arent covered by collar) - Nibbles on his sensitive ears - Soft S/O gasps
N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs) - BDSM is a BIG NO. Zeikun couldnt hurt S/O because of his protective nature - Nothing that could hurt S/O even if she likes something that is dangerous he simply wont do it. Sorry if you are maso and searching for pain-
O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc) - He prefers to give the pleasure to S/O - He doesnt mind receiving though- - Demon… what else to say about his skill? ;) - S/O would have great night~
P = Pace (Are they fats and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.) - Depends. - He actually would start with slow and sensual… to just get to know his freshly discovered “teritorry”. - If he discovers what S/O likes - he gets fast and rough, unless S/O doesnt like it this way he goes still slow and sensual. - However it also depends on his mood… and S/O mood so he might go however S/O will like it ;)
Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.) - Not a big fan of quickies, but rarely he will do them anyway.
R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.) - He doesnt feel like to get risky with their moments… - However he could take risks if S/O would be okay with it. - He personally wouldnt take risks.
S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…) - Demon. Thats all i have to say ;) - He could go few rounds as long as S/O will feel like it.
T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?) - Pffff. Zeikun and toys. He is forest demon, and he would have to know there are sex toys? - He would only learn about these from S/O probably… - He could get some maybe, - And he could use them to tease S/O more.
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease) - Im sorry, for me he is big tease material. Even if he is loving boyfriend he has no mercy in teases, straightforward asshole likes to play a bit - also preparing S/O this way before they will consume their love ;)
V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make) - I doubt he would be loud. - He would let out soft gasps
W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice) ;)
X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words) ;) Big boy with also big friend in his pants wht you excepted ;)
Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?) - His sex drive is high, but he doesnt throw himself on S/O whenever he wants something more
Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards) - Not really quickly. There is a lot of time to cuddle with S/O, whisper sweet words, have small talk. Loving soft kisses… maybe exchange of soft smiles on S/O goofing softly. ;)
11 notes · View notes
apricotpicotty · 3 years ago
Text
i liked talking to him..
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say STAND WITH HONG KONG AGAINST THE CCP!
You both like mbti.
You: hi
You: hey
You: eyoo
Stranger: Hey
You: wht's your type
You: mbti type
Stranger: Entp
You: ew why
You: ded ass
You: you there
Stranger: For you
You: ehh
You: i didn't get you bro
Stranger: Are you halal?
You: what's halal?
You: lemme google
Stranger: How old or dumb are you?
You: i'm 18 you bigot mute ass
You: wby?
Stranger: 21
You: fuck tht's old
You: sorry
Stranger: Wha
Stranger: ?
You: never disrespect your elders
You: so sorry
Stranger: Do you have an ass?
You: an a human body part or an animal?
You: as an*
Stranger: Body
You: are you ass-less?
You: tht must be sad
Stranger: And
Stranger: How's your mom?
You: pretty as ever
Stranger: Any siblings?
You: yea a lil brother..
Stranger: How old?
You: why are u asking me these?
Stranger: Why would you ask me my questions?
You: i didn't ask you any of your questions..
You: you okay?
Stranger: But suppose you did
Stranger: Why would you?
You: idk maybe to plot a kidnapping??
Stranger: Aight
Stranger: Have you had sex in life?
You: yea twice with girls only
You: right i didn't mention i'm a girl too
You: wby?
You: m/f?
Stranger: M
You: ehh sucks
Stranger: So
You: wby? ever had sex?
Stranger: When was the last time you cried?
Stranger: Yes with my cousin
You: fucked your cousin
You: ??
You: fr
Stranger: Yeah
You: was you cousin a guy/girl??
You: your*
Stranger: Guy
You: tht's like a dreak come true
You: lucky you bro
You: and i cried maybe a month ago
You: dream*
You: when and why did you cry the last time
Stranger: Yeah aight
Stranger: Well
Stranger: 2 years
Stranger: Watching a movie
You: ohh 2yrs tht's when u were 19 or sum
You: tht's a long time
You: are you happy
Stranger: Yes
You: in college?
Stranger: Yes
You: what do you study?
Stranger: Software Tech
Stranger: If you wanted to kill someone who would it be?
You: i know who i want to kill
Stranger: Who?
You: i will make someone else kill them i'm not getting my hands dirty
You: an ex-classmate
You: wby? who would you kill?
Stranger: Ahh... My roommate
You: fr? like actually like uk dead
Stranger: Yeah
You: killing your roommate hmm you'd become a suspect
You: what will you do then to cover up?
You: how do you want to kill?
Stranger: Kill myself
Stranger: Strangle
You: how will you kill yourself ?
Stranger: Jump off
You: tht'd be painful
You: how about pills?
Stranger: No
You: die in your sleep
You: if you're going to die anyways..
You: why not kill a few more people?
You: tht one night/day you get to do anything you want
Stranger: Eat my ex
You: yea kill your ex and eat his/her heart
You: raw
You: or cooked
You: whatever you like
Stranger: Cook
You: hmm it'll be easier to chew
You: ever loved someone?
Stranger: Yeah but twisted
Stranger: Toxic
You: hmm
You: do you think i'm loveable ?
Stranger: Idk
You: reasonable idk either
Stranger: Aight
Stranger: Have you seen ghost?
You: nope
You: wby?
You: ghosts lmao tht's childish
Stranger: Have you killed any animal?
You: insects.. i've killed a lot but not animals
You: but a lot of animals are killed for us
You: so..
You: does that count?
Stranger: No
You: idk it should i mean it's dead for us
You: but then no i havent physically killed an animal
You: have you?
Stranger: No
You: good dont think about it
You: kill humans instead
Stranger: Why not?
You: maybe cuz i'd rather clear out my own species before i kill other species
You: does tht make sense lol
Stranger: Yes but it won't matter
You: why not?
Stranger: Who'd be there to give a fuck?
You: hmm right
You: but i dont want to see animals die becuz of me
You: i love cats
You: so.. nah
Stranger: Aight
You: where are u from?
Stranger: India
You: lol same
You: shouldn't u sleep rn?
Stranger: No
You: why not?
Stranger: Who knows
Stranger: No one's here to order
You: but dont u have to get up early?
Stranger: No
You: uhh
You: which state r u from?
Stranger: Bengal
You: delhi
You: hmm far away i see
You: cool
You: tht's sad
Stranger: Well
Stranger: Do you believe in God?
You: yea
You: are u religious?
Stranger: Idk
You: idk? it's a yes or no question
You: do you believe in god?
Stranger: Yes
You: are u bengali too?
Stranger: Yes
You: hmm we're both fucked in our heads
Stranger: Nope
You: right
You: only you're fucked
Stranger: Nope
You: i want to keep talking to you
You: but i have to sleep
Stranger: Which God do you believe in?
You: every god
You: i believe in every god
Stranger: Why?
You: let's say gods do exist
You: i wont want to disappoint any one of them
You: so tht's one reason
Stranger: What if you go against them?
You: i don't have enough powers to go against them
You: and before i do
You: there'd be alot of people against me
You: and let's be real 1 vs 1000+
You: who's gonna win
You: not me for sure
You: i'd be killed just for not being a part of the huge cult
Stranger: Well if you want, you make human sacrifices
Stranger: Can*
You: how will i sacrifice 10000+ people? be logical
Stranger: That'd help you to die faster and get back at Gods easily
Stranger: Just 50
You: wont tht be considered a sin?
Stranger: By whom?
You: by me/the gods?
Stranger: Yes
You: so nah ill pass
You: you can go against the gods and write a book or something
Stranger: What's the idea of sins?
You: typically, something which doesnt fit the human moral compass
Stranger: Aight
Stranger: Goodnight
Stranger: Ggs
You: night
Stranger has disconnected.
0 notes
athena-swords · 3 years ago
Note
Heyy wassup? here for the game. I choose number 1. My eyes were choosing between 1 and 6 👀 lolll but anyways, one thing that I have always wanted to tell someone is "Do you like me?🤨" 😂😂😂😂😂 I knw its not romantic and shit but yea😂 idk wht else to say. Or maybe "what did u eat today?" 😂😂😂 I m a foodie so I gotta knww👀 -R
Heyyyy you got a interesting one...
Like in your school they might be the one who never liked someone but all the girls be having hots for them and nobody knows they got the hots for you I can see very soon some makra boys starts teasing them on your name and. People getting to know about their crush/admiration on you they will not like confess or proposes caz it's not that strong but like you are better than other girls I am seeing them saying more sane lol.
OK byy you guys are having real rainbow life's bitch why mine is so online.
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partlycharlie-archive · 7 years ago
Text
ep: things leo does; by jason grace
chapter 2. aftermath link to chapter 1
summary: 2. hey, mom? okay, there's this guy named leo, and i'm in love with him. wait - wait, you knew that already? well. fuck. wait! aha - i bet anything you didn't know he was in love with me, now did you? yeah, i thought - fuck. word count: 2,051 warnings: mention of cannibalism (not serious), mention of DDLB/NSAP, morse code a/n: valentines chapter because i’m a sucker for the babe :/  read on ao3
5. taps out messages in morse code when he thinks no one is paying attention
Two short taps. One short, one long, two short. One long, one short, two long. Rinse and repeat.
Three letters.
Jason’s sure nobody else has noticed - Leo tapping his fingers in what seems to be a random pattern is nothing new, and his eyes track Chiron’s movements with what seems to be laser focus.
He likes to think he knows Leo better, by now.
Jason thinks back on his old Morse training (“Why do I have to know this?” “Just in case.” “What the hell kind of situation requires us to tap Morse code to each other when we have fucking mouths?”) - laborious months of bullshit memorizing that he never used on quests, but damn if it isn’t coming in handy now.
Two short taps. I
One short, one long, two short. L
One long, one short, two long. Y
ILY.
Jason jerks up in his seat, avoiding Leo’s eyes when his fingers stop tapping and he glances over, obviously concerned.
Leo’s mouth quirks up into a tiny smirk - how the fuck does he manage to lift only a corner of his mouth, and still convey so much? It’s fucking adorable, and Jason hates it - and he focuses back onto Chiron, who is trotting across the front of the room with a vaguely frustrated expression on his face.
Leo’s fingers continue their tapping, slim fingers pressing coded messages into the tabletop.
Two short taps. I
One short, one long, two short. L
One long, one short, two long. Y
One short, three long. J
One short, one long. A
Three short. S
Three long. O
One long, one short -
“Alright, any questions?” Chiron asks suddenly, raising his voice to attract the attention of any heads whose heads are drooping (Jason tries not to feel guilty - fails - whatever.). “No? Alright, dismissed.”
Jason glances at Leo, who is standing up like nothing’s changed, slapping his hands on the table like nothing’s changed, brushing a hand down his jeans like nothing’s changed, turning to leave like nothing’s -
You get the point.
Okay, so Leo had spelled out ILY JASO- something. That something was either a K, a D, a Y, a C, an X, a B, or…
An N.
Was it too much of a stretch to think he might have been spelling out JASON? Zeus knows it wasn’t JASOD, anyway.
Fuck.
  6. acts like a child when he gets tired*
* leo doesn’t get tired.
“… so the chip attaches to this port -” Leo yawns, and then shakes his head to clear it up, “ - and so it becomes able to track -” another yawn, “ - the movements -”
“Leo?” Jason asks, tilting his head slowly. Leo glances up, blinking blearily (ha, alliteration) up at him.
“Yeah?”
Jason smiles fondly, unable to hold back his reaction to an evidently tired Leo.
“You look tired. Ready for bed?”
Leo shakes his head again, more rapidly this time, and his curly hair flops around with his movements. He blinks a few more times, then opens his eyes as far as he can. “Nuh-uh,” he says, with an expression like a guilty child.
Yeah, right. Even Jason’s tired, and Leo likes to call him Superman - mostly because he looks like a blond version of him, but also because he’s basically superhuman. Jason doesn’t really get tired.
“Yuh-huh. C’mon, let’s head to my cabin. It’s too late, I don’t want to wake the Hephy kids up.”
Leo shakes his head with a petulant expression, narrowing his eyes and leaning back in his chair. With arms crossed, he mutters, “Nuh. Uh.”
Jason raises an eyebrow and nods to himself for a second, fighting back an amused smile at Leo’s behavior. “Alright, you’ve got a couple of options,” he relents, watching with the fond grin that he hadn’t been able to restrain as Leo slowly relaxes, nodding with lingering suspicion still present on his face. “You can either get up and walk with me, or I pick you up. Your choice.”
Leo sighs heavily, tipping his head back and huffing out another breath through his nose. “Fine.”
Jason stands, hovering for a few seconds. He frowns as suspiciously as he can manage when Leo doesn’t stand up like Jason thought he would, instead slouching further into his seat with hands outstretched, as if…
… he wants Jason to pick him up. Of course he does.
“You’re a fucking baby, y’know that?”
Leo shrugs, a carefree smile on his face. “Yup.”
Jason sighs indulgently. “Yeah, of course you do. Alright, we’re doing piggyback, because we both know - despite how incredibly underweight you are - there’s no way I’ll be able to hold you on my damn hip or whatever for the amount of time it’ll take us to get back to the cabin.”
Leo nods and Jason turns his back to the shorter teenager, crouching on the balls of his feet with his hands outstretched behind him. As carefully as he can manage (which isn’t saying a lot, considering how fucking delirious he seems to be), Leo tucks his legs into the slots of Jason’s hips and he stands up, chuckling softly when Leo yelps behind him.
He regains his balance, though, and wraps lanky arms around Jason to rest in the juncture between his neck and shoulder.
“Good to go?”
Leo says nothing, merely nods against the shoulder he’s already starting to fall asleep on - not that Jason expected anything less.
“¡Dios mio, las luces!” he cries almost immediately, shoving his face into the back of Jason’s shirt. [t - Oh my god, the lights!]
Jason can’t stifle the chuckle that escapes him - okay, so maybe he forgot to tell Leo it was basically morning, but. Who could blame him? He’d been… distracted. By Leo. And his hands. And his hair. And his smile. And his laugh. And his -
You see? It just happened again. Totally not his fault.
Definitely.
"Sorry, love," he says, trying and failing to sound truly apologetic. (Did he just say love in reference to Leo? He’s not going to think about that.) "Afraid I can't turn these lights off."
A groan spills its way out of Leo's mouth, sounding suspiciously like a "Why not?" but with a lot more vowels, probably.
"Well," he starts, the fond amusement (he’s fond way too often when it comes to Leo, damn it) probably ridiculously evident in his voice, "there's this thing in the sky - now, don't get too excited - called the sun. Totally crazy, right? It -"
Leo's left hand knocks harshly against his temple. "Asshole."
"- even makes this wild thing called - wait for it - light! It's pretty fuckin' awesome, if I may say so myself."
Leo sighs. "You may not," he grumbles, and Jason can feel the fluttering of the other boy's eyelashes against his neck. He fights back a shiver at the surprisingly intimate feeling and tries to concentrate on getting them to his cabin.
"Hey, dad?" he murmurs, words slurred through a heavy tongue. Jason opens his mouth to answer, but -
Wait.
What?
He freezes.
Mentally, of course, because otherwise Leo would know something was up, and he was so close to falling asleep, and Jason really didn't want him realizing what he said, because it'd turn into a whole production, and Leo would never get to sleep, and then... you get the idea.
But - anyway. Back to the matter at hand:
Dad?
Is that, like, a kink thing?
Jason remembers reading up on kinks (it was a late night and too many Wikipedia articles, sue him), and he's pretty sure daddy kinks are a thing.
(Eugh. He shudders at the thought. Yikes.)
But - that didn't sound like a sexy Dad word. What would a sexy Dad word sound like? It'd probably be Daddy and not Dad, for one.
Oh, gods.
He's getting off track.
Jason decides, as any sane (teenager) semi-mortal would do, to completely ignore the last word of Leo's sentence. "What's up, squirt?"
Okay, what the fuck?
He definitely meant to say Leo, or maybe bro, as regular teenage boys do, but squirt? Gods, Jason's out of his mind.
Maybe it's because Leo's way heavier than he looks. Who knows.
"'m tired."
Jason resists the urge to fist pump the air, instead pulling Leo onto his hip for ease of motion.
"Yeah, yeah, me too. Don't worry, we're almost there."
  7. has horrible grammar when he texts (no, it doesn’t annoy jason)
[17:49] leo_valdez: wht do u want 2 do 4 dins 2nite
[17:55] jason_grace: Salmon with asparagus and rice?
[17:58] leo_valdez: damn chef grace out here [17:58] leo_valdez: yeah boi
[17:59] jason_grace: Okay, cool.
[18:38] jason_grace: Hey, Percy said he’d cook. Cool with you?
[18:43] leo_valdez: yeah np
[18:45] jason_grace: He might take a while, though, so I think we’ll be eating late tonight :/
[18:45] leo_valdez: ye its fine i ate late 2day
[22:24] jason_grace: How’s it smelling over there? I’m hungryy
[22:30] leo_valdez: lol i cant smell anything
[22:31] jason_grace: Omg lol. Do you think it’s your poor sense of smell smell or that nothing is cooking??? Haha
[22:31] leo_valdez: both lmfaooo
[22:32] jason_grace: Lol, okay.
[23:11] jason_grace: 11:11!
[23:14] leo_valdez: my wish is 2 eat
[23:15] jason_grace: Mood [23:19] jason_grace: I’ve died a million hungry deaths already. I may start to eat paper any minute. [23:19] jason_grace: It’s organic, right???
[23:20] leo_valdez: yeah totes gotta get on that #vegan #organic #freerange #localwoodonly trend [23:20] leo_valdez: ykno this shirt is made out f cotton????? thts a crop i cld totally eat this
[23:22] jason_grace: As long as you take tiny bites like a rabbit.
[23:22] leo_valdez: yeahhhhhhh [23:23] leo_valdez: i s2g im gonna eat percy if he doesnt tell me its fuckin ready soon
[23:23] jason_grace: Wait what’s s2g again? [23:23] jason_grace: Oh, nom.
[23:23] leo_valdez: swear to god
[23:23] jason_grace: Nvm*
[23:23] leo_valdez: NOM NOM I HUNGRY
[23:24] jason_grace: Lolzzzz.
[23:24] leo_valdez: thnks jace u rly gotta remind me ://////
[23:24] jason_grace: He’d probably be pretty tasty. [23:24] jason_grace: Remind you of what?
[23:24] leo_valdez: how hUNGRY I AM
[23:25] jason_grace: Nom nom nom I have no other words.
[23:25] leo_valdez: nom [mood in hungryspeak]
[23:26] jason_grace: Me nom.
[23:26] leo_valdez: i just saw th word omw and rly tht it said nom im losing my mind over here
[23:27] jason_grace: Our bellies could have been full hours ago. Savage.
[23:27] leo_valdez: ikr [23:27] leo_valdez: horrible
[23:29] jason_grace: Are tears edible???
[23:29] leo_valdez: hopefully im producing way 2 many of thm
[23:30] jason_grace: Sip slowly, I don’t want you getting full before we eat.
[23:30] leo_valdez: i gotchu [23:31] leo_valdez: trying 2 remind myself tht festus 2.0 is a living being and im not ready 2 b a murderer
[23:34] jason_grace: Oh honey. He wouldn’t be tasty. Too much fur.
[23:34] leo_valdez: u rite u rigt
[23:34] jason_grace: What were we thinking??? We know Percy well enough by now lmao. Sigh. Burp. Ugh.
[23:36] leo_valdez: im crying salmon
[23:37] jason_grace: Oh noooo why’d you have to say salmon?????
[23:38] leo_valdez: LMAOOOO
  8. loves jason grace
Okay, okay.
You gotta keep this one a secret until Jason finds his journal again, okay? He doesn’t know I took it.
I’ve read through it a couple of times, and - damn is Jace a fucking sap. It’s a pity I love him.
No it’s not, who am I kidding.
Aha! That’s the first time I’ve written it down since I realized (which was… too long ago for me to feel comfortable admitting to).
If you didn’t get that, Jason: I love you, you piece of shit.
Ugh.
Fuck, whatever, maybe this thing is a prank and he doesn’t actually love me. Maybe this is a hallucination? Dad knows I’ve been spending way too much time in the Bunker, anyways. Maybe… who knows, honestly.
God, I’m tired.
Whatever. I hope he finds this soon, I’m tired of waiting, for Christ's sake.
See you soon, hopefully.
- leo valdez, the one & only
I love you too, Leo.
38 notes · View notes
dragon-zena · 7 years ago
Text
even More OC group chat shenanigans
HUGHES: Madena oh my god
ZI: jdndjdjdjjd madena you did NOT
MADENA: I TOTALLY DID IM SVDBDBHD
HUGHES: I hate this Madena wh
HUGHES: “considering that I am a gay,,,” LIKE
ZI: “half of us,,,are immigrants,,,and children and grandchildren of immigrants,,,,end it” like has your best friend ever
HUGHES: YEAH MY BEST FRIEND HAS EVER THEY DID IT TODAY YOU WERE THERE
MADENA: im sorry but like what did she expect complaining about gay people and immigrants to a nb bisexual with two parents from two different continents...like? Ok
ZI: let's debate sexuality when it's obvious that half the class are LGBT and the other half are bigots!!!
ZI: let's talk about “illegal” immigration when almost EVERYONE IN THE ROOM has a close family member that immigrated here!
HUGHES: RIGHT AND TBIS IS AP POLISCI NOT AP “DISCUSS HUMAN RIGHTS” LET'S N O T
MADENA: this is both the greatest and worst day of my life why did I SAY that dbdbdn
ZI: what u said was true and you should say it
MADENA: mnmerrg
ZI: mads ur literally iconic there are literally people talking about u being their hero I'm???
HUGHES: I can't believe the evil was thoroughly defeated in our third hour class today.
MADENA: theevilisdefeated.png
CAMILLA: Narla!
NARLA: Yeah?
CAMILLA: Friendly reminder that we have a game today uwu……….do u have what u need? You dint have ur knee pads last time
NARLA: Fuck, I honestly forgot my stuff. I'm probably gonna drive home and get them.
NARLA: And never say “friendly reminder” or use uwu ever again in my presence.
CAMILLA: You should let Zi bring you uwu
NARLA: Perish, you bitch. You bully. You scoundrel.
CAMILLA: ;^)
NARLA: Hey, Zi. Are you busy after school? I was hoping that I could get a ride home, today. I have to get my vball gear for tonight.
ZI: oh! Yeah! I'll be waiting in the car after school. Can i
ZI: uh
NARLA: ?
ZI: can I come watch you, tonight?
NARLA: I'm blushing so hard she asked to come watch us tonight.
CAMILLA: HELL YEA we need the support
CAMILLA: Not that we gonna lose but your biggest fan being there is gonna make u go into overdrive.........ur gonna beast out........
CAMILLA: ion know if the other team is gonna stand a chance
NARLA: PERISH, ASSHOLE.
NARLA: Of course you can come! :)!
ZI: !!!
CAMILLA: WELCOM TO MY F U CK HO US E
MADENA: we have banini...and avocaidi…
HUGHES: Perish
ZI: perish
NARLA: Perish.
MADENA: Oh worm? Permission granted?
ZI: MADS NO
HUGHES: N O
ZI: mmmmmMMMAAAAAAAAAAA
STEPHANI: God, same.
HUGHES: What's going on in Louisiana? ):
NARLA: They keep raising the prom fee as though we're made of money. Lmao.
JUSTINE: I mean, Narla will be fine, she’s actually made of money,,, but like, not many other people will be.
ZI: LMAO.
MADENA: Zi ):
ZI: im sorry im sorry I just
NARLA: I'll pay for you to go. I'll pay for any of you, if you need it. It's not like we're using it for much, at home.
CAMILLA: ,,, Narla,,, ur mom
NARLA: Irrelevant.
MADENA: godiwishthatwereme.png
CAMILLA: aight……………………..
ZI: id die for Narla but whatever
HUGHES: You're at her game, aren't u
ZI: …no
HUGHES: …
ZI: …yes
ZI: Hughes her thighs...her calves….me gay
MADENA: I heard gay what's goin on
MADENA: oh its just z nvm
ZI: thighs.mp4
ZI: look at her go!
CAMILLA: ive come from the court to tell u that you are Definitely in the wrong chat
MADENA: ho-o-oly shit
CAMILLA: i got her phone lmao y'all secrets safe w me
CAMILLA: just deleted those messages have fun in pineville bye
HUGHES: Isn't that actually a place in Louisiana
HUGHES: Cami?
ZI: she's back on the court but yeah it is
ZI: holy shit I owe Camilla my entire life im going to the T3 Group Chat
HUGHES: real paranoia hours
HUGHES: if u up alone at 3:10 in the morning
HUGHES: hearing things, seeing things, and overthinking ur relationships
HUGHES: slam that mf like
HUGHES: this is so stupid like wow I love. feeling this way. Fave. 10 out of fuckign 10 i lobe iy
HUGHES: I need tk pee but im svared tk adn no ones up i catn
CAMILLA: oh shit
CAMILLA: ok okay im up right now, I'm here right now, I need you to take deep breaths for me
HUGHES: catn’
CAMILLA: can I call u
HUGHES: yehh
ZI: oh no
NARLA: Hughes, are you okay, now? I'm sorry that I wasn't awake when you needed someone. ):
CAMILLA: they asleep rn but I think they r ok for rn
CAMILLA: has this happened before zi
ZI: not to this extent
ZI: sometimes he does focus extensively on everything around him and it makes him anxious
NARLA: Maybe this should wait until Hughes says that we have his permission to talk about this.
CAMILLA: yeah
HUGHES: last night was a shit show
HUGHES: my bad
MADENA: Are u ok now?
ZI: ^
NARLA: ^
CAMILLA: ^
JUSTINE: ^
STEPHANI: ^
HUGHES: Yeah thanks
HUGHES: Camilla made me take sleep medicine and i pretty much passed out soon after lmao
CAMILLA: Sleep > Being Awake lmao
MADENA: mood
ZI: ......everybody wants to be a cat.....
HUGHES: oh my god not again
ZI: aS quare witha horn makes u wish u werent born evertime he plays
MADENA: Oh A Rinky Tinky Tinky!
ZI: with a square in the act! u can set musci back! to the caveman days!
NARLA: Oh, a rinky tinky tinyk!
HUGHES: This is torture you’re all doing ths knowing it was my fave song to play in jazz band end me
MADENA:  👀 👀 👀
Narla: RIP...It was my fault, I wanted to watch The Aristocats.........
HUGHES: Perish, Narla Miaro.
NARLA: Fuck you, Hughes.
STEPHANI: atthepool.png
STEPHANI: shes so fuckgin beautiful shes wearng this bikini and shes like fuckign aphrodite or sme shit
JUSTINE: END THIS
JUSTINE: prety.png
JUSTINE: LOOK AT MY GIRLFRIEND SHE DESERVES THE WORLD SHES GIGGLIN
NARLA: God, can you imagine if I had let the two of you pine any longer than you did?
ZI: this is so gay and cute
MADENA: Justine where do u find ur swimsuits and Steph u look gorgeous end me please
JUSTINE: blush.png
JUSTINE: shes blushing ths is so cute
JUSTINE: Also i just got them at waly worl
MADENA: bless ur photogenic souls for telling me
CAMILLA: U do it for he
NARLA: And you would do it, again.
CAMILLA: You do it for she and now u say
NARLA: You do it for he.
HUGHES: One day is all I ask
HUGHES: Sometimes I forget that the moment Euthymia left the house for college, she changed from a subtle gay to a vindictive gay.
MADENA: God my sister is so fucking iconic mom was like “i dont support that in my house” AS THOUGH I DONT EXIST IN THE BOUNDARIES OF THE HOME BUT ANYWAY Euthymia shruges and is like “im not in your house so lmao watch this” AND KISSES AGATHA RIGHT IN F R O N T OF HER hhfkrk
ZI: im lauhing
HUGHES: Shes not at her mom’s house rn she came to bring something to me for Mads and she’s sporting an undercut and a lot of lgbt pride pins AND a lot of really clever enamel pins too i envy her
HUGHES: She??? Also has??? A scar on her eyebrow???
HUGHES: I ASKED WHY AND SHE SAID “YOU SHOULD SEE THE OTHER GUY”
MADENA: TELL HR TO STAY PUT IM C O M I N G I GOTTA SEE THIS
ZI: send a pic when u get there i wanna see
EUTHYMIA: inspiring my lgacy to be vindictive gays lmao
AGATHA: im lauhfing Zi just texted me and told me that Hughes called you a vindictive gay
EUTHYMIA: im so happy that im able to be ths way
EUTHYMIA: but i want them to wait until they’re super safe until they even think about following the near vicinity of my footsteps
AGATHA: you aren’t even super safe but i get wht ur sayin
AGATHA: I love you, Euthymia Nadine.
EUTHYMIA: I love you, too, Alaris
AGATHA: oooh my last name hot
EUTHYMIA: end it
HUGHES: That freshman is going to get in a fight this afternoon
MADENA: ?
HUGHES: sorry the thought just came to me
MADENA: Hughes,,,
HUGHES: I was right,,,,,,what the fc
ZI: oh thats like when Madena said something about ancient greec andt he teacher was like “nuh uh” but when he searched it up it was true
ZI: but Madena didnt know how they got it right it just randomyl popped up in their mind
CAMILLA: Physics can suck my asshole
HUGHES: Oh?
MADENA: *Hughes voice* oh, you haven’t heard?
CAMILLA: i die
HUGHES: I tutor in physics
MADENA: hes not gonna ask you to pay which is why u should
CAMILLA: I DONT CARE AS LONG AS I PASSED THESE FINALS WHATS YOUR FUCING PAYPAL
HUGHES: meet me in the PMs
MADENA: this is so fucking funny hey @Narla d o u need help with physics
NARLA: No.
MADENA: god i wish that were me
ZI: god i wish that were me
ZI: :0!
MADENA: O: twinsies
1 note · View note
kunalkarankapoor · 6 years ago
Text
Viewers feedback on Kunal Karan Kapoor’s character as Angad Yadav.
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Played very well indeed....! i love him mean .....lol whereas if u've seen angad's previous shows...u wld never in ur faintest dream think of him in this role...i am bowled over.. rochella_22 
i love to Hate Angad thats why .. enjoyed his and krishna's act a lot !!! these two share a marvellous chemistry together .... all of their encounters are superb .. ImmaculateDream
I dont think that everyone is bashing the actor or character...they just expressing their feelings abt this character...which i must say that the actor is playing very well to get this kind of negativity...which is remarkable...the guy is doing his job well....and how !!!! rochella_22 
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I loved it wen Angad said tum toh dhare ke dhare reh gaye aur sara mazaa woh kutte ka bachcha leh gaya.... (scene with Pragya and dog) Auditi
What added spice in the end was Angad's dialogue when he asked his mate "Tumare bhaiya soh gaye ka?" (scene with Pragya and dog) Unnati
Superb mindblowing acting by arhaan n kunal karan kapoor WOW (restaurant scene) ArhainAshiah
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Today angad wa d way he came to nitin langur LOL aaaker jaise aankh maaareyit was a cutee n sweett scenee..angad wa is very funnnyy yet a goon n he was standing leaning langur nitin's car n his boyss r beating langur nitinkaa styleee hai bayyy ArhainAshiah
wonderful acting by Kunal, and yes that wink made an impact! Kunal is such a brilliant actor dkmystery
yaaaaa, even i loved his wink ;) .... and that wink means beta buhat parne wali hain tumhain yasmeeneee
angad is vry funny...drata b hai or wink b krta hai... bt he is cute yaar.... Shivani_4u
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Kunal's character changed a lot...last time I saw him was in Remix....n there he was totally a innocent n in this he is a goon.....wow....he changed a lot....but still he got some gud acting skills.... frndship_trust
eally .....thats cute i like him in lrl...n cant believe that he is the same guy. kunal is a gr8 actor Sweet_sona
i also lik him in LRL...bt nw he is totally changed Yudi se Mr. Yadav bann gya hai. Superb actor... Shivani_4u
I enjoy watching him on screen.. He's so convincing as a ghunda.. Mahabhootini
oh god! poor boy! par he plays his character vry well ... though da guy is pretty gud lukin  ... he manages to play da character of villain vry well n forces all of us to HATE HIM! lol LuvKriya
angad is super bad ! love to hate him..... rochella_22
The guy who plays Angad...he is a brilliant actor. Anjalg
totally agree that he is just too bad and creepy, but he actually makes this show more exciting, Limits
he is quiet gud looking and is doing a great job playing a gunda cloud123
me too......his character is horrible but kunal is 😍 i love u kunal!!!! serialmaniac 
hez cute. i lovd him in LEft right left.... Almas
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Spin_off show with Angad
Ok i love how everyone is so involved with getting a lady love for Angad, maybe there should be a spin off show with Angad as the lead.........I've already thought of the story.........so we all know that Angad has a sick mother in gawo (village)...maa maati nahi aur jeeti nahi hai
so the story is that the sick mum asks Angad to marry and chooses a bride for him and he marries her even though we know he has no interest in that and that's where the story starts??????????Now it won't be like the story of Pratigya where she fights for the rights of women in the Singh household......but i guess the story depends on who he would marryso which lucky girl should it be and what kind of life would they have??????
Rolli......she is strong and brave and will try to change him....make him more like Adarsh, get a job, stop hanging around with Lucky and Jugnu (poor guys) and maybe quit paan
Komal..........this sherni will try to be the male dominant in the relationship would be hilarious to watch, consant nonsense arguments, and threats that Krishna will beat him up
Arushi...........maybe she's too cute and sweet personality for him, she'll be too scared????
That's all the female characters.....maybe someone else???
Anyway what do you guys think?????????
Angad Wah Wah And Angad is back he made me laugh when he was talking about his sick mother Amma na jeeti hai na marti hai Xxxjrae
Since Rohli now looks set to be parted from Adarsh, I'd REALLY like her to be paired with Angad  They'd work so well! She's civlized and gentle but she still speaks up for herself so she'd be perfect for Angad. Kunal's a real asset to the show since he's one of the best actors on it so they shouldn't just let him go on being the obstacle in the Kriya relationship and then just leave him by the roadside.... shi_no_tenshi
pehle b kaha tha aur abhi b keh rahi hun .... ANGAD N KOMAL .... will wrk wonders .... un logon ki khatti meethi kahani will be a treat to watch wd loads of masti + masala +khoob saara daraana dhamkaana - romance .... LuvKriya
kunal is so handsome and cute and arushi is cute too....they perfectly matched....but damn he is a gunda....all my dreams shattered in pieces.  i hope they make angad good and arushi-angad track.....i am tired of his schemeing....he is a hot schemer Mages
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oh u brought back long lost memories. i was an ardent fan of lrl. after a gap of 4 yrs i am now hooked on to pratigya. i remember him dressed as a girl in lrl.  angad aka kunal kapoor played the role of an army cadet. he does not get a date so goes to the army ball dressed as madonna the hot girl along with his roommate. kunal acts damn well . even his tragic scenes make the audience cry. his role was just the opposite of angadwa. he was cadet yadhuvansh but the cool dude hated his name so cut it to yudi. i loved his role and i love his new desi look in pratigya too. he is an extremely versatile actor and can give any lead pair a run for their money.  he may appear only at times in pratigya but angadwa ki wajah se hi pratigya aage badh rahi hain
hats off to kunal for his choice of roles. ofcourse madonna ko toh mein kabhi nahin bhool sakthi. i still watch those epis in my computer anujkpjk
kunal karan is undoubtedly very very shweeettt as a person hes a really nyc n shweet guy hes rockin as angadwa n i lubbb anagdwa n krishu wen dere aamney saaamney tooo hotttt n dey sizzle d screen tgdr..i actually miss angadwa wen hes not in d drama:( ArhainAshish
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i mean the way he speaks and acts. what did you think? LOL seriosly if it weren't for him this SHOW would anther sas bhu shit! LOVE_DMG
yaa angad is the villan of the show and he is a very good actor too so i also don't want him to die CHHAYA007
i like kunal but angad iam not a huge fun of his khusboo16
I love kunal's acting... i mean he has to be a good actor to make us all want to collectively bash him up. kudos to his acting. he does not need to scream or overact. just those eyes slant and u want to throw something at him. Ek.Romantique
ohm y goddddddddddddd!!!! terrible yaar!! i personally HATE angad but i wud never wnt him to die coz he's da only one whcih helps maintain balance happiness n sorrow in pratigya's life , i LOVE kunalll nd wud never wnt this to happennn luv_kriya
i will miss kunal karan kapoor,no doubt.... i just LUBBED his acting....and i just LUBBED to hate angad.... today a trmendously good actor took farewell frm the serial..... now whu is gonna add to the mirchi masala of the serial? i will truly miss paanwala..... i like kunal immensely.....he is my "purana pyaar”  kasturika_kashu
He was a wonderful actor Binny
I'm sure that either Kunal has taken up a new show or again going for a vacation... but he has to come back! I'll also miss him dkmystery
Im soo goin 2 miss kunal & angad he's my fave actor/character in pratigya hope he has a gud vacation DEENCH
yeah i thought he was a good actr aswell, he was very funny in some scenes and evn though he was bad, i diddnt hate him, mayb jst a bt annoyng at tmes! i wsh he cums in a show and hes a positive character, tht would be very good Mazzy101
Honestly, this show not just belong to kriya, but also to angad. Prabhkallu
yeah, n I'm not happy... I'll miss him yar paan khaye angadwa hamar dkmystery
i just hate thttttttttttttt.. i want angad back........he always put masala in the show n i just love tht.................Neha_angel
no no no ANOTHER ANGAD.....i want THIS angad back...........he is the best villain....and without villain u have no masqala....take two three mnths watevr possible bt bring angu back.... kasturika_kashu
3-4 months without my kunal ..............i cant live serialmaniac
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ahahaha hmmm...kunal is a shweet guyy..hes a total gal wen it cums to shoppin awww ahaha cuteee..n awww he spends n dosent really cares abt investing..guddd hes young he shud travel n do shopping n enjoyy lyfff...awww he worked at a call centre hmm..kunal is reallly shweett anagdwa ko pataa nai kia hai lol..y is he after my krishu n his happiness:((but i dunno y i miss angadwa wen hes not in d drama m lukin forward lets c wht krishu does with him this tym;)ahahahahan kunal is a gr8 photographer as well..he has put on reallly beautiful pics on fb..d scenry n d places where he goes r beautiful..travel kertey kertey bhul jataa hai k anagdwa ki shootin b kerney hai:(i lyk him with krishu dey rockk tgdr although dey're fighting most of d tym ahaha:p ArhainAshish
angad's scenes was much better den dis curent boring track! Shashi2011
A veritable Iago as some people described him. The actor definitely played the role to the hilt. He was really quite outstanding I thought and entertaining as well. Nayak29
the actor is great... TonsOfWishes
pls add me too , he is a brilliant actor Binny
hey i am also a big fan of kunal i really like his acting from the serial left right and he also do great work in pratigya serial he is a very gud actor chhaya007
I miss Angad and his typical bihari dialgoues...I simply love the way..he used to say...aiyee professor. I loved his dialogues..made me laugh..typical bihari style..he pulled off his role very well,I must say...his chamches ran away..lol chits1
he is a superb actor. whenever his scenes come up there is no boriyat, he makes u sit up and watch. u are always waiting and wondering "ab kaa karega be".
jitni galiyan angad khata hai ees forum pe usi say pata chalta hai what a superb actor he is. no screaming, no special ticks, nothing... just his "tirchi" aankh ka slanted look and u r worried what he is going to do now. Keep it up Kunal.!! Ek.Romantique
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Just now..i am chatting with Kunal bhaiya and he says that Angad and his friends will be back in August...for TRP....jisse khush hona hain hoo..jisse dhukhi hona ho.....thanks to him...aur kuch pataa chala toh likhoongi........ Anaya_kgp
He says Krishna will die next week....OMG.... Anaya_kgp
arey....abhi woh keh rahe hain..it was a joke...mazak tha..my heart came out..yeh kaisa mazak tha?? Anaya_kgp
Meri pyaari behen...vo aapke jiju hai bhaiyya nahi!!! Aur meri izzazat ke bina himmat kese hui unse chat karne kii (i'm very possesive like krishna about my kunal serialmaniac
he is laughing...main sunke paglaa gayi... Anaya_kgp
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Good second lead roles.
Now a days show writers are giving equal importance to other lead roles to make an impact amongst the audiences by their acting, though it may be a cameo but still their role is remembered. We take a look at few such roles.
Kunal Karan Kapoor in Pratigya He popularly known as Yudi of Left Right Left show, but now is more famous as Angad, the bad guy of Pratigya show. Whenever he is in the scene he takes all the credit by his acting style especially his style of having betel leaves.
LINK: http://www.indya.com/gallery/indyagallery.aspx?p=Good-second-lead-roles&aid=1518
I'm so proud of Angad, i really miss him on the show, i really like his character and his acting!!!Glad he's getting credit and recognition. Xxxjrae 
yes mima beta!!!!!! Kunal is a superb actor. I lik hiz acting....bt where is he?? Ye Instalment me kyu aata hai.. Shivani_4u
tht tatto he has on his arm..my cousin has the same tatttoo must have hurt him like hell..my cousin was hurt like hell..n i love angad's (kunal's) hair..nice..wht shampoo does he use. daisyluv
aw...he is looking so cute...he deserve better character yaar... shumi
i miss angad/kunal soo much hope he cames back. DEEENCH
But must say both Kunal & Arhaan are doing a good job ..their characters add spice to the show. Unnati
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Angad...our new competition (NBT airing same time slot as Pratigya)
y competition Poojie????since he was also part of MKAP and was a deserving artist,who actually got acting skills he surely deserves good wishes.All the best 2 him. KP Marina
and he is a brilliant actor as well.. Poojamenon
Good luck to him as he is a talented actor..:) Sheena
angad used to rock in MKAP! that time MKAP was the BEST!! bugsbunny
All d best 2 Kunal coz he's a fab actor Eden_luvskriya
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I dont know how many of u are aware but our 'new guy' is called SUKHI in the show...his real name is KUNAL KARAN KAPOOR....he is a nice actor and i loved him in LEFT RIGHT LEFT as YUDI...he was there in REMIX too as karan wahi's best friend(dont remember his name)...I LOVE HIS STYLE and its a treat to watch him in maayka...i think he brings freshness to the show...there is this great scene of his from left right left where he is tryin to commit suicide...i tried to post it here but apparently i cant...its there under yudi suicide attempt...do watch it if u guys can...its awesome! rochella_22 
i love SUKHI...very captivating... u gotta see the scene where SUKHI gets in the tempo lookin at tina had me all..."awww....he's lookin so cuteeeeeeeee".... i still cant take my eyes off the screen....and u r rite....both of them do look really cute...i dare say...the sub-plot is better than the main track...lol rochella_22
their chemistry really adds 2 whats going on around them it makes it so interesting and sweet ILUVPREM
0 notes
andystanberg · 8 years ago
Text
~ still not gay ~
Word Count: 2 800
Genre: chat fic, coming out, coming to terms with sexuality, humour
Pairing(s): phan, tiny mention of kickthestickz
Warnings: swearing, so many spelling/grammar mistakes (all on purpose as it’s a chat fic), mentioned homophobia, sexual humour (not a lot)
Summary:
crabstickzzz has added PJ to the chat. PJ: what? dannyboy: chris and co. think im gay
A/N Shout out to the (formerly) ~ still not gay ~ chat, thanks for not believing I was straight. (Loosely based off my own unconventional coming out.)
AUGUST 12TH
dan is gay
crabstickzzz has added PJ to the chat.
PJ: what?
dannyboy: chris and co. think im gay
PJ: you are.
crabstickzzz: SUCK IT HOWELL
LouiseP: Chris, Dan clearly isn’t ready for blowjobs yet.
dannyboy: IM NOT GAY
PJ: sure.
crabstickzzz: wat about ur crush on phil
AmazingPhil: His what now
dannyboy: i dont have a crush on phil
PJ: sure.
dannyboy: im straight guys cmon
PJ has changed the chat name to dan is in denial and gay.
dannyboy: oh for fucks sake
dannyboy: seriously guys im 100% sure im straight
PJ: sure.
-
AUGUST 15TH
dan is in denial and gay
AmazingPhil: Why is the name always about Dan
LouiseP: This group chat is dedicated to whether or not Dan is gay. And memes.
crabstickzzz: thats all we talk about so theres no point in creating another
PJ: i’ve been in this group chat for two days and it’s true.
dannyboy: why does it matter what i am
crabstickzzz: bc u wont admit ur gay! we r teaching u to love and accept urself 4 who u r!!!
dannyboy: bullshit
AmazingPhil: Maybe we should lay off Dan a bit
dannyboy: thank you filip
AmazingPhil: Never mind please continue
dannyboy changed the chat name to i hate you all
-
Private chat between dannyboy and AmazingPhil.
AmazingPhil: You’re not mad, are you?
dannyboy: no
AmazingPhil: Sure?
dannyboy: its fine. theyre joking and having fun. i just dont get why they care so much about my sexuality though
AmazingPhil: Maybe Crabstickzzz and PJ have a crush on you and Louise is trying to wingman both???
dannyboy: yeah right. can you imagine?
AmazingPhil: You never know
dannyboy: for starters, nobody has, or ever had, or ever will have a crush on me, and secondly, crabstickzzz and pj are dating
AmazingPhil: WHAT? WHEN? HOW?
dannyboy: well i dont know for sure but cmon
AmazingPhil: Oh good. I thought I had missed their big reveal
AmazingPhil: Also don’t be so sure about the crush thing
dannyboy: what? who has a crush on me?!
dannyboy: PHIL LESTER ANSWER ME
-
NOVEMBER 20TH
i hate you all
dannyboy: GUYS OH MY GOD DID YOU SEE THE PIC ZAC EFRON JUST POSTED
LouiseP: Who’s Zack?
PJ: oh boy.
dannyboy: HOW DARE YOU! ZAC**** IS THE ACTOR OF TROY BOLTON AKA MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
AmazingPhil: I JUST SAW IT TOO HE LOOKS SO GOOD
dannyboy: I KNOW RIGHT?????
LouiseP: daNIEL
PJ: HAH KNEW IT.
dannyboy: what
crabstickzzz: ur not good at being straight, my friend
dannyboy: oh come on! i may be straight but im not BLIND!
PJ: sure.
dannyboy: phil back me up!
AmazingPhil: Dan has a point.
crabstickzzz: spoil sport
crabstickzzz has kicked AmazingPhil from the chat.
dannyboy: OI
LouiseP: Chris, add him back in.
crabstickzzz: fineeee only cause ur scary
crabstickzzz has added AmazingPhil to the chat.
dannyboy has changed the chat name to welcome back fil.
AmazingPhil has changed the chat name to chris sucks.
dannyboy: i second that
crabstickzzz: wat did i do???
PJ: you’re really asking yourself that?
-
NOVEMBER 25TH
chris sucks
LouiseP: It’s been five days are you all dea?
crabstickzzz: yep im so dea
LouiseP: Oh shut up, like you can talk.
PJ: he never stops talking. don’t encourage him, for my sake.
crabstickzzz: do not
AmazingPhil: Do too
PJ: do too.
dannyboy: do too
crabstickzzz: alright i get it
LouiseP: Do too.
LouiseP: Whoops.
crabstickzzz: watevr
crabstickzzz: so dan have u figured out that ur gay yet
dannyboy: for the last time, im like 99% sure im straight
PJ: that’s 1% less than last time.
crabstickzzz: progress!!!
dannyboy: no its just that if evan peters wanted to fuck me, i wouldnt say no
LouiseP: Hardly anyone would.
dannyboy: see? it doesnt prove anything
AmazingPhil: well…
dannyboy: I THOUGHT YOU WERE ON MY SIDE
PJ: welcome to the dark side.
AmazingPhil: I just go for whatever side is winning! Can’t blame a man for surviving
dannyboy: thats not the saying
AmazingPhil: It is now!
dannyboy: weve been over this! you cant steal sayings and try to change them
AmazingPhil: I just did
dannyboy: why am i friends with you
crabstickzzz: bc u like him
dannyboy changed the chat name to ~ still not gay ~.
PJ: sure.
LouiseP: You say that a lot.
PJ: it’s because it’s needed. if dan didn’t deny the blatantly obvious, i wouldn’t have to be sarcastic all the time.
crabstickzzz: dont lie to urself
-
NOVEMBER 27TH
~ still not gay~
dannyboy: oh my god oh m y god
AmazingPhil: What?!
dannyboy: fcukin evan peters in ahs
AmazingPhil: ARE YOU WATCHING WITHOUT ME
dannyboy: maybe…
AmazingPhil: BETRAYAL
crabstickzzz: gayyyyyy
dannyboy: fuck off let me have this chris
PJ: yeah chris, fuck off.
dannyboy: thanks pj
PJ: it’s okay. also...
dannyboy: what
PJ: gayyyyy.
AmazingPhil: Okay but Dan has a point
LouiseP: True!
dannyboy: phil and louise are my only friends
crabstickzzz: danyul they both like guys doesnt that say something
dannyboy: psh whatever
-
DECEMBER 25TH
~ still not gay ~
dannyboy: ugh im stuck with sucky wifi away from home :(
AmazingPhil: Aw! Does that mean no skype tonight?
dannyboy: im using my data rn and its so slow, skype would be a nightmare. sorry phil
AmazingPhil: I’ll see you when you get back, then.
dannyboy: yeah :)
crabstickzzz: ugh stop flirting
PJ: yeah, get your own chat.
LouiseP: I think it’s cute.
dannyboy: yeah okay im leaving
PJ: he didn’t deny the flirting part though.
-
JANUARY 1ST
~ still not gay ~
dannyboy: new years and no one to kiss wow what a surprise
AmazingPhil: My offer still stands ;)
LouiseP: WAIT, WHAT OFFER?!
crabstickzzz: yeah wat offer
PJ: is no one gonna..?
PJ: okay fine I guess I’ll have to do it.
PJ: gayyyyyyy
AmazingPhil: I wish
dannyboy: keep dreaming philly ;)
LouiseP: I ship it.
PJ: join the club.
dannyboy: can anybody read what the title of this chat is
crabstickzzz: we can we just dont care
PJ: the only reason no one has changed it is because of its irony.
-
JANUARY 12TH
Private chat between dannyboy and AmazingPhil
dannyboy: ahH EVAN PETERS
AmazingPhil: Dan are you sure you’re not gay
dannyboy: well i mean i have liked girls before so even if i did like guys i wouldnt be gay
AmazingPhil: Bi?
dannyboy: maybe idk
dannyboy: but anyway EVAN PETERS
-
JANUARY 16TH
~ still not gay ~
dannyboy: this chat is so quiet
AmazingPhil: For the first time in forever
dannyboy: did you literally just reference Frozen
LouiseP: What’s wrong with Frozen?!
AmazingPhil: Yeah Dan what’s wrong with Frozen
PJ: he probably thinks its gay lmao.
crabstickzzz: dans literally the epitome of no homo
dannyboy: wow what a big word you used there chris
dannyboy: do you even know what it means
dannyboy: also i’ll have you know i have proudly never said no homo
AmazingPhil: I’ve tested that ;)
PJ: WOAH WHAT DID PHIL JUST MAKE A DIRTY JOKE?
LouiseP: PHIL, I THOUGHT I RAISED YOU TO BE A GOOD CHILD.
crabstickzzz: DAN WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO HIM
dannyboy: wouldnt you like to know
crabstickzzz: wht te h fcuk
PJ: … GAYYYYYYY.
LouiseP: I second that.
AmazingPhil: I hope that
dannyboy: that doesnt make sense
PJ: okay, straight boy, he meant ‘fil hopes you’re gay, as in attracted to boys, no “no homo”’.
dannyboy: im not an idiot
crabstickzzz: debateble
dannyboy: debatable* dumbass
-
JANUARY 30TH
~ still not gay ~
dannyboy: HAPPY BIRTHDAY PHIL MY BEST FRIEND
LouiseP: Happy birthday! Wow, January went by quickly.
dannyboy: yeah can you believe that Phil Lester created January and the world was so hyped for his birthday it sped up time
PJ: oh my god, guys, holy shit.
crabstickzzz: what
PJ: DAN DIDN’T TALK ABOUT HOW BIRTHDAYS ARE A STEP CLOSER TO DEATH. AM I ALIVE?
crabstickzzz: hoLY FUCK UR RIGHT
LouiseP: Dan, you feeling okay?
dannyboy: jeez sorry for wishing my friend a happy birthday
AmazingPhil: I thought it was sweet
crabstickzzz: yeah we get it u love each other
PJ: they’re so cute but so gross.
dannyboy: i dont like phil cmon guys
AmazingPhil: I thought we had something :( you even forgot to talk about the inevitability of death for me :((((
PJ: hey, at least he didn’t say he doesn’t like guys or reference the chat name.
-
FEBRUARY 3RD
~ still not gay ~
dannyboy: ugh people suck
AmazingPhil: What happened?
dannyboy: nothing
PJ: sure.
LouiseP: You can tell us, Dan.
crabstickzzz: as long as its not blackmail worthy bc in that case dont be so sure
LouiseP: Chris.
crabstickzzz: i was joking, ofc he can tell us
dannyboy: nvm, i said it was nothing
-
Private chat between dannyboy and AmazingPhil
AmazingPhil: Seriously what happened
dannyboy: one of my old friends from uni keeps asking me when im getting a girlfriend or making jokes about my lack of love life every time he sees me and im sick of it
AmazingPhil: You’ve complained about him before and it you never seemed too bothered
dannyboy: yeah well…
AmazingPhil: ?
dannyboy: i know it shouldnt bother me but this time when i tried to ignore all of his questions about getting a girlfriend or whatever he said “you’re gonna turn gay and be alone”
dannyboy: like i know gay isnt an insult but at the same time it bugs me? is that wrong?
AmazingPhil: I don’t think so. Maybe it was just that he said something like that in the first place
dannyboy: maybe… or like some internalised homophobia idk i feel shitty
dannyboy: im just so tired of everyone asking me when im gonna get a relationship
dannyboy: my mum has been making hints at it lately
AmazingPhil: I love your mum but everyone should back off
dannyboy: this is cheesy but you’re the best
AmazingPhil: No problem <3
dannyboy: <3
-
FEBRUARY 4TH
~ still not gay ~
dannyboy: youll all be happy to know that i almost accidentally kissed a guy today
crabstickzzz: o H YM GOD DANYUL WELCOME TO THE GAY SIDE
dannyboy: a l m o s t + a c c i d e n t a l l y
PJ: sure.
dannyboy: i thought you had stopped with the sarcastic sures
PJ: keep dreaming, howell.
crabstickzzz: shut up time for the important qs
crabstickzzz: was it fil
LouiseP: Please for the love of god let it be Phil.
AmazingPhil: Let what be me
dannyboy: they’re freaking out over the almost kiss
AmazingPhil: Oh! Sorry guys, it wasn’t me
crabstickzzz: NOOOOOOOOO
PJ: sure.
LouiseP: Liesssssssssssssss.
dannyboy: it was this cute guy who ive been friends with for a while and we were messing around and whispering in each others ears to waste time during some meeting that was probably important and i turned just as he was whispering something and our lips almost touched
dannyboy: we jumped back just in time
PJ: there was so much gay in that that I can’t even form a coherent reason as to why it was gay.
AmazingPhil: Can you believe that Dan cheated on me :(((((()(09()
crabstickzzz: CUTE GUY? WHISPERING IN EARS? HOWL U R GAY OK
PJ: good news, chris just said my reasons for me.
LouiseP: Who’s the lucky guy?
dannyboy: first of all, weve been over this. i know when someone is cute, guy or girl. second of all, we were whispering creepy stuff like “mayonnaise” to try and freak each other out and third of all, not telling because id know you guys would stalk him
AmazingPhil: I know who it is ;)
PJ: i bet it’s phil.
dannyboy: nope. i said CUTE guy
AmazingPhil: HEY!
dannyboy: kidding. but no, it wasnt phil
-
FEBRUARY 8TH
~ still not gay ~
LouiseP: Alright, for today we put a halt on the usual Dan is gay discourse.
dannyboy: thank you friend
PJ: why? did someone die?
crabstickzzz: BREAKING TRADITION IS NOT ALLWD!!!
LouiseP: Shush, let me talk about a cute guy I saw today.
LouiseP: Anyway how do I ask him out?
AmazingPhil: Wait until Valentines and anonymously get him a rose.
dannyboy: ask him out or let your feelings pile up and watch him inevitably move on because you’re too scared to make a move
PJ: talk to him on the internet until you become best friends and be gay oops i meant straight for each other.
crabstickzzz: love poems via mysterious skype calls no one gets to know the contents of
LouiseP: The last two are unrealistic. Who talks to a stranger on the internet??? Stanger danger!1!!1!
dannyboy: fil i think theyre picking on us
AmazingPhil: Fair enough
dannyboy: YOURE SUPPOSED TO BE ON MY SIDE
-
FEBRUARY 11TH
~ still not gay ~
dannyboy: i cant wait to get nothing on valentines
LouiseP: Same.
AmazingPhil: Same
PJ: same.
crabstickzzz: sam
crabstickzzz: samr*
crabstickzzz: SAME****
dannyboy: this chat is so depressing
dannyboy: also learn how to spell
crabstickzzz: np
crabstickzzz: no*
-
FEBRUARY 13TH
~ still not gay ~
dannyboy changed the chat name to ~ not gay, but bi ~
crabstickzzz: I KNEW IR
dannyboy: shush
crabstickzzz: I FCUKIGN KNEWS IT
dannyboy: you saw nothing
crabstickzzz: YOURE BI
dannyboy: i was right about not being gay though
crabstickzzz: BUT I KNEW YOU WERENT STRAIGHT
PJ: WOAH WOAH WAIT WHAT’S HAPPENIGN OH MT FGDPL.
LouiseP: PJ ISN’T USING FULL STOPS!!! HE’S BROKEN!
LouiseP: DAN, YOU’VE BROKEN ALL OF US!!!
dannyboy: I SAID I WAS 99% SURE I WAS STRAIGHT
crabstickzzz: I WAS RIGHT AND YOU WERE WRONG
dannyboy: NO YOU THOUGHT I WAS GAY
dannyboy: WE WERE ALL WRONG
PJ: S T I L L.
AmazingPhil: This is so amusing
LouiseP: WHY ISN’T PHIL JOINING OUR FREAKING OUT?!
dannyboy: … might have came out already yesterday maybe haha dont kill me
PJ: WHAT?
crabstickzzz: FUK U FIL AND DANYUL
LouiseP: AND YOU’RE ONLY TELLING US NOW??????
dannyboy: yeah well coming out to phil was the first time ive ever done it so it was a little emotionally exhausted and i shook so much that i needed to recharge
AmazingPhil: He was so nervous but I’m proud of him
PJ: yeah, same.
LouiseP: I second that!
crabstickzzz: I FUCKING NKEW TOU WERE GAY
AmazingPhil: I thought we had gotten past this bit
dannyboy: chris, read the new name. im still not gay, just extremely bi
crabstickzzz: sry but i cant believe ur finally coming out
LouiseP: If you don’t mind me asking, what made you realise you were bi?
dannyboy: it all started with this one guy in high school who was so fucking hot and i had like a teensy bit of a crush on him and omg he was so pretty and one time i saw him literally leaning against a wall with his hair messed up and i died
dannyboy: i thought it was a one-time thing and i wasnt really sure if it counted considering ive only ever been attracted to girls before that, but recently ive just come to terms with that and the other thing
crabstickzzz: WHICH IS
dannyboy: nnnnnnnothing
PJ: sure.
AmazingPhil: Ha you guys aren’t on best friend level, so of course you don’t know
crabstickzzz: r00d
dannyboy: dont worry he doesnt know either, hes just being a little shit
AmazingPhil: Love you too
LouiseP: Can you imagine how much we would’ve freaked out over Phil’s message in August?
PJ: seasons change and people do too, apparently.
-
FEBRUARY 14TH
~ not gay, but bi ~
dannyboy: [image attached] someone sent me this chocolate rose with a note saying “- Voldemort” i wonder who that could be??!?!?
PJ: yeah, can anyone think of a super pale nerd who likes Harry Potter almost as much as Dan does and knows where he lives??? I’m coming up blank!!!1!!
LouiseP: Awwww, that’s so sweet!
crabstickzzz: barf
AmazingPhil: Thanks Louise I spent 2 whole pounds on it
dannyboy: spending so much for his boyfriend ew sap stop wasting money
PJ: bOYFRIEND?
crabstickzzz: WAIT I THOUGHT U 2 WERE JUST BEING WEIRD AND PLATONIC COUPLEY LIKE U ALWAYS R AND UR TELLING ME UR DATING
AmazingPhil: It turns out that the “other thing” Dan mentioned was him liking me
dannyboy: and also staring at his lips whenever he talks to me and thinkingaboutkissingthemmaybehah
LouiseP: CONGRATS, GUYS!
PJ: this is like my OTP.
crabstickzzz: *teenage girl voice* OH MY GOD MY OTP
dannyboy: lets leave before they start being weird
AmazingPhil: They’re our friends, don’t worry so much
crabstickzzz: so like did your first kiss involve tongue or
AmazingPhil: Yeah, bye.
crabstickzzz: he didnt say no
LouiseP: cHRIS.
dannyboy: if you must know, it involved NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS
dannyboy has left the chat.
AmazingPhil has left the chat.
PJ: …there was definitely tongue.
LouiseP: Agreed.
220 notes · View notes
billymayslesbian · 8 years ago
Text
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eh. yeaoh, brinng t o. wwind, chek. - ant nn aececk.-necta pack, check. - ingss check.- sti gercheck. scared oo f my sorts, check. o, ldies, let;s moe it o! poun hossse peunis,yuu sriip d st em-suck rs! al ofu, drainthos floers! wo! i;;;;m out!i cn;;tbbelive ;;m ou! s blue. i fee l so att nn e ! bo xkkit! ooow! fower this slll lea der. we have rosesvisual.r ing it arund30 egrees an d hlddd. rose s! 30 de grees, roger bingin g t roaund. staind to the siddde kid i tgot bi of a kick. htt is ne nnear collllectr! eversee o lination u p cos?- no si. i pic up some plllen here, prinkl e it ver ere. mayb a dashover thhere a pih on hait one. see that? it;s a itle b io maggic. tha t;s amzin . w do w d ht? that;;;s polll len p ower.more pollen, mmmore f l owerrs, m ore eecttar ,more one y for u ooo im picking u a lot off bightylo. ouoldbe daisiae . on;;;t we need ose? oopy t at vsa l. w t. one of hese ffowers eems t nhe move. say aan? yu;re eporting a movi g flower firiv e thit was on the i t his is th c ilst. at isit? i dn;; kknow, bui;;m loving thiscolor. i se ls good.no liakea flllower buillike . yea, fuzzy. ohemcc-y. oarefol, guuysss. it;sa li tte grabby. my st llor of bes! oannnyrai, get off there! pobm! - guys! - thius could be bad. af irm atiov . very clo . gonna hur t ama;s litle bo you aree wy ott of poition, rooe! oo mmin in at yo u lllikea missle !help m!i dddon t hink se arefower. - houl we tellhim? i tnk h knows. hatisths! match point y can sart packing up, neu, becauseyou;;re au to eatit!! yowe! oss. threabe nthe c ar! - ddo so mething gg! ;;; d rvvin!- hi,be. hhhe;s b ack hee! heginggg tto ti ng me! nobd moivvve. f u ddon;; oe, hew;t sstng you. freeze! he blined! pray hi, grnny! wht are you doig?! wo. . the ten sion lveel out her is nbllli eva blo. igottttat ome. an;;;tflyinnn rain. oan;;t fly inran. oa;t i ran. maday!myday bee goinggg down! ken could you close ttthe windoplee ? ken, cud y ouu close t he widdow plea s e?? oheckkk ou my new ressume. ii made it ito a od-out boche. you seeu olds ot. h, n.moreumans i dn;;tneed thhhi hattt w as tha t? ayb thime. tis ti m.th time. this tim e! th i tie! his... dapes! hau is di abolical. s fntast ic. i;;g al m special skills,even y top-tten fav orite movie what;; n umber ? star r s nah, i dont go for at... ...in of stufff. o wonder e soldnt tal to he m. hey;r ouito hhhei minds. wheni leavea job interv iew, they;r flabb er rgated, can;;;t blev what i say. t heres the s u. maybethat;;s wwwa outtt don;;t remer the uun hhhav ing a bi 75on it. i predictebawarmming. i od feel i ettig hot er. at firsti thoght it ws utme. wait! stop be! stan back.thhee aar nttter bots. wait! don;;;;;t kkill hi! ou know i;;m alergic t th em! is tin coul kill me!why dos islie havve llless va lu e thhhan ours? why does hhis life hhhe aany es vvau thn mmmie? i tht your tatemment ia;mjustt s ayin alllllife has aue. ou do n;ttnnow wht hs cappobe of f eelng brcure ! hreyou go , little guy. ;;m ot care d ofhim. it;;;s n al le rgi cthnnn. pthat on yorrr re suea rochure my whole fae uld puff up. mauk e i tt one of your special ski ls. kno king omeonu is alo a sspecalskill. right . ye, vvvaessa. tans. - vaanessa, next week? yogur t ngh? - ure, en. yu kn ooow,hateve r. yu couillld put carob hi ps on tere. - b ye. - suosed to e lscao ries.- io gottta saysmetig. she savdmy lfe. g otta s aysometingall right,, here ittgsss. h whatt wuld ie sayi coiuld ealll yget i rob. ;;;s a e lawwww. youre nottts pppose t tllk to ahuman.. i cn;;;tt bele ve immm doi ng thhii. ;;v e ot to. o i ca;t do i. ooome o! no.yes. o. do ii it. ii a;;t. o sho uld is tt i? "you llke az?" no,th ats no god. he she co ms! sek,yofoool!hi! i;;msor ry. - you;;reakiung.- yes, knoew. you;;rretalking ; orrrry... no , it; ;ss o .its fine. iii know i;; dreaming. but dont recal going to bed. well, i; sure ttthi is ver diconcertinggg... thisis a bt o fasurrset m. i mmmeoan, oure a bee i am. an i;mnnnot suppodd tobe doin is,bt ty werelll rrryingto illme. nd if it wasntffor you... i had tto thak you. it; j ust how ias aised.tha twas aitlweid - i;;mtall lkin ita be. yyah.;;;mtalkinggg a ee . nd the be iiis talkin to e! i just waont to say iii;;;m grateful.i;;;;; ll lea ve now. w ait! ho ew diddd y lear tod thhhat? - what thealking tin g. ame w y you id, i uaess. "mam, da da, honey." you pic it up - that;; v eo y fffuny. - ye. bees aere f unny.. if we did;tlagh wed crrrry with w hat w e have to deoal wittth. anyway... o an n i... ..geou smhing? lke whh t? d ddon;;;t know. ean... do;;;t kkowoffee?i do;t wa oo put ou ot. it;;s norble. it takes t wo mi nutsss. - i;;;s js cccofee.. - i hae to impse... don;;;;t be ridiclous! ctually, i woud oe a c up. eyyou wan rum cake? i souudnt. - have some. - no, i cc an;;t. ome on! imm tryingo lose a c ouple micr orams. - wre? - hs e strp es don; ; lp. yu loo ge at! ii don;t no w if you knowanythng about fahon .. are you allright?? nnno. e; akng the t i in thecab as the;;r e yinnnn up adiso. he fnally gets the e. hhhh r s p the stpps into the cccrch. the edin is o n. and he sas,"wateurmlon??? i thought osid gutmaan. hwwwuldi ary a watreolon??" i tta e e jokehat;;;s hei ki nd o f we do. yah difffferen. sso, what re yo gon na do,bbrry? ab o worrrkk i do ;;tknow . i wat od mmmypat forrr th hivv, bbt i an;to itt h way they wannnt. knowwhow youfel. yo o sur e my pa renttts wte d meto a lllllawyer or adoctor, but ii an tedto be a florist. -eall?- myoyiterest is fflowwwrs. ur neqqueen wasjuastelected with tat same campaign sloan. anyway,ifou loio.. here;;s m hiv right here . it? your in shep meadw! yes! ;;;m ght off tturtleu ond! noway ! i knoawthhatt ara. i lost toe ri ng ther oncce. - w do gggirl sputringgson he tos ?- why ot? - it;s likeu puttig ha on yo ke. -maybe i;;;l try h at. you al l ig ht, m;m? - oh, yeah. fine. ju haviing tttwo cps of coffee anwa, hs ha beennn grat.thank for t coffee. yeh, t;;sssno troub le. sory i could;;;t finsh it.ifi diddd, ;;be upth res of my llife. are y u...? an i take apppiee of h s wiet e? s re! her, a rub . tns - yeah. all right. el l, then... i gu esss i;;;ll see yuaround. rnot. ok, barry.. an thankou o much aigain.. or bbefore. oh, th? tattwaas nhieg. el, notoi n, utt. anyay... thies a;t poossib lywork... h; salll set to goe a a s l try it. o, dave, ppull thhe chute. - souns amazzz iig. - i was mazig! it wa he sc arie, haeppist me nt ou y liof human !! i can;;;t believ e youwe wit humn gin,sca ry huian! whatwwwerei ttt ey ke? hg and crzy. t tak crazy. they at crazy giantt hing s. theydive crazy - o thy try and kill ou, lik oun tttv? - oe oaf them.someo of them doant. - how;;;d you et bac?? p o le. yu idit,nd i;;; lad yo ssaw whatev er you wanted to ee.you hhhhd you "euxpeince." nowyou caa pck yyyorjobn b nnnormal...-well...- well?well, i met smeoe.you did? wwas shh bbee-ish awsp? yourairrrentsssw l kill you!-no, n, o noa asp . - pp pider?- iu;m not attrcte to pppiad ers.i ow itsttthe hott est thing, wt htheightlegs d all. ie can;t t bythat ac. sso h is se? shs..hman. nn, no. tta;;s a beeaw. you oudn ;t break a eee la. h er ame;;vanesa - ohhh,oy. he;;s s n ice. andd se;s a florit! oieh, no youre da inghuan floris!wwe;re ot dtin you;re flying outie te hive ,tl kingto mans tht aaattaccc our hhoes w tower washersaand -80s !on-ighh th s t ick o ynte! h savvved life and she uunderstandsme.his is eir!eat his. this isn t ove! what ws tth at? - they call iiit a rumb. - i wa s s ngin;; strpy and thhat;s n ot what ey at.ats hat fals ff what ty eat! -yu no whattt a oinnabon i ? -o. ittsbread and nnamon nd ffrostin. they hea t up... sit don! . . .rallyhht! - li s tn to m we ae ot t ea! were us here;s u s and thr; them!yes, b t h c dey ttthe ert hais yearnin? he;;;;no yearningtopyearing.llisten to mm! you have ot tto str thikingee , y riend. thiingg bbbee! -hinking bee - tinkig b e . thinki be e! hinnkngbee! hinkn be! tthiking be! there he .hhhhes in he pol yo u knwwwht yourprrob lm s, barry? i ott tart thinkin g ee howmch onge will this go on? it;;e te ays! wh aren;;tyou worknggg? ;;;ve ggo a ot f bi life deciions to think abo u. wat l ifeyu have nnn e!you haveno job.u;;;re brely a bee! ou d itk il you tomaea llttle hhoney? bary, com o ut. ourfathe ;stalkin t o ou.artin, woul you alk o him? baery, i;; talingg toyou! yo c omiggot veryth inga ll st! go ahead. ill cath p. don;t be oao long. watch ts! vnessa! we;re stillhere. - old you not tttoo yel a hmmm. e d oes n;;t rrrrepo to ellng - the hy e ll at e? - be cause yo ot lllllisten! i;mot lis tn t his.sssorry ivea go. - where re ou goieennggg -i;;mmmeetina fe d. a gil is this whyu ca;;;tide? bye. i jjuhope she; bee -ish. th eavvve ahugeo parade f foe rs evy yri pa saea? to be n the tttttounam nt foes, tha;;s every fl oist;;s dream! u p o aflt, srrouned b y fffloiwwwerr , crowds ch rin g. ournn. o ttheoe cmmmpete in ath letic ev ens?no. all ight, ive go one how co me yo uo fly evewere i euting.hy don; ou run every wher? itt;;s faste . yea h ok se e, i se e. llright, yor tur. ti v . yo c an jst freez liveu tv ?tttthat;;s insane! y ouont hav that? e have hivo b u its adisease. its a horbbble ,hrribledisese. ohm.dddumb bess! y umust watt st ngall tose erks we try nnnot osting. it;;;s usulyfata loru . soi yoouhe to wwath ou temper. vry carefullly. ou kick awall, ta a wak, write a n ary lter an d thro i out. w ok thugh it lie eany e mtion: ag r, jealus,ut. oh m ygod nesss! ar you ok? yeoah. -what is rongg withyou???! - ts abg. hes not botering ayod.gge tout of h ere, you cre! wht ws ttt ? a pi c ;;;n s ave ircu lar? yea it was.howww di yo kow? ifltlke a but age s. sevent-fve is ety mmuch ur limt. you;; e rrlly gotthat dow n o a sciec e -ilot aa a cousino italian voeg ue. - i ;ll bet. what in the name of mightheculs is is? how did thisget he oute bee, gollen blssssom, ry litta priovate slet - is he tha actor? i n eerr heard f hm. - why isthhhss here? -o ur peple w et it. ou dont hav e noughfood offf o ur ownn? - wl,,, ye. ho do you get it? - be s mke it. i kno who makes tt!an its harddt o make it! thre;s heaing, ooli g, st irrin.yo nedda wole k rmanthing! - it;soegnni. -its our-nic! i; just hon ey bary. just wha?! bees don;; now abt his! tisis stealing! a lo o st ai ng! you;ve tken our homes, shool s, hos p tals!this is all we have!and it;;;s on salei;;m gtti ng o thebotto fti. metting o the bottmof all of this! hey, hect. - youamos doune? - almst. e is hre. ise i. welliii uess i ;ll g o me nnow and ust leave thisnicccce oneoyot, wit h no o rround. you;re busted, bo bo! i knnew i eead smhg. s y an t alk!i cain t and now you;;ll stt talking! where yu getinggthe sweet stuff?w ww ho;;syourrr pie er? i dn;; t derstand. ithouht we ere ffriends. t h e last thig e wa nt t dois pset bee you re toolat e! t; ;;s ors now! o u, sierr, hae rossedthe wrongsod! yu, i, illbe lunh ormy igu an, ig nacio wher sss he honey omng fro? el m wh er! honey farms ! it omes rom hony farms! orazy esoannn!hattt horib le tting has happened her? teefaces, the n eer kew whtt hitem. aun ow tey;rrre o th r oadtonohere! juskep till. wwwht? you;;;re not d? do iook d? ttheywilll wipe anthiagthat moves. where you head? to honee fmsi amouno so metingg uge here. ;;m going to a lausk. moose blllood, crazy stuf . bows you head ff!!! i;;m goiong to tc. -ond yyou? hereally i s d ead.alll right. u-oh! - what i ha?! - h, no! a wwwipper! ripeblade - tiple blade? jump on!is or only chance, bee!!! oes ee rytinghave to be s o dogg oe clean?! how m uch do youpe olene edo ee? open you r eye sss scyou had out the indow ! fr om npr news in w shgton , i;;moaraosel. bbbut doo;;;t kll n m or bugs! - beue! -mose bblood guy!! - y ou hear smething?likewa t? le inycrammmiung. turnf ttthe a dio. asup, beea b oy? hel oodjust a rrow ofoney ars, a far e ye coulllsee. wow! i sumewhererthis rukgoe s wher e hey;;re etinnnng it. i me an, thaut h n u.bee hangtghtt - we;;;re l jamme in. i;;;s a cl osecommunittty .nnot us, man weon our oow. evrymosqu itooon h is own. -what if you getin troble ? - ou a mosquit o, you in trouble. nnobodylikes u s thyj ust sack. seea msquitosmack, smack! at ast you;;re out inthe wwwold you ust meet gggirls moosquito girls y to rradeup, get wth a othh,dragony. osssquito girldon;twant no mosquio . yo gt ttobe ddding m! mooseblod;;;sabou t tola e thulddng! long, bee! - yguys! -m oseblood inw i; ;;d ctch yallowwwwn ee.d you b ring yur rrzy tra w? wethr it inn jar, slap a ae ll t , an it;; pretttty much pure prof it wat is thhhisss plaoc? a bee ot branthe size of anhead. they are heads!pinhad. - ohec kk out the e w mo ke.-oh, set. thasss theone you want. the thomas 300!smoker niinety pffsa mnuesem -autoaic.twicthhhe n icc otin e, all the tr. a cupe beathsof this knocks themm rig h t o. e mak th honey, an we make the mony . "theymke the hney, adwe ake hhe mone"? oh, my! whas g oiggg on?ar you ok? yeah.idoesn;tt lst to lg. do you knowyoureinfake h i with fake wall? r queen wa ovedhere. we ad nochoie. this is you qu een? that;;s amn in women;;s clothes! aatt; ;s a drag que! what is s oh , no! ther esdr e ds of thmbee hney. ourhney iss eing brzenly sto len n a massiv scle! this i worse than ythin beas ha e done! intnd t o omehng. o bar, stop. wwh oldddd y hum ans ae taakigour hony? that;s a uor. othee ook lik rumors? ta;;s conspiracy theory. t h es earobiou sly docttored photos. how did you g e mxd u in thhiis? he;;s been tlkgo hanss. what - alking to hman s ! has a human irlriend. n dtthey makk ot a out? barry we not. - o ua ish oucold.- wse sideare you o n? thebee s! i dateda cricke onea nsn an tonio. thoe crzy lgs kpt me upa llll niht. arry,this iswhatyu an to dowith your ie? iant tod it for all ourllives . nobody works harer t ha bes d ad ememrou coming homme sooverworke d you r hhha nss rrre tils irrng . y couldn;t sto. iember that. what riht d they hhhhave ttto our honey?w e lii o two uuepsa yer. thy t iiiat in l bam forr n reasn wha tsoe r! venif itss true, whatcan oebe do? sin them whear it realy ur t. in th fc e! the y! - hat wwoauld hhhut.- no. u the nos? thas kilr. theres oly e place you can sting thehumas, oneplacewhereiitm atters. he at fiv thu hivvve;s ony full - ction newsss source nomore be bbbeards! with bobbumble athe anchorrd esk. wether wwwwith storm stinger. spors witbuzz lrv i. an jaeneutt ohu ng. -goid venng. im bob umblllle.- ad im jeanee ohung. a tri- ooounty be, brry esoun,,, intends t o se the hman race for stealig or hney, packging i and profit ig r i legally! tomorownight onbe larrry kiong, well a e hee fo rmer quees ee in our studioi, iscuess ingthe irnew bok, ollllssyladies, o u ths we o hexan. ongt we;talkin g tbbbbbarry bnso did ou er thiunk, "im a idfr om thhhe hve. ca ;; t doa this? ee hvv veneve ben afaidt chane t he wd.what about bee olubs? ee gandhi? be esueis? where;m from,w;;; nevver suehummans. we wrre hinkingof tkkkal o adystr how oldarey ou? hhhee e commu n ity sss sppoting yo in this case, whichwll bethe ria l of t e b eee centuy youknow, tey have a la rry ing i nthe hnwold to. iut; ; s a comm n name. nnexwee k.. he ooks ike you aas a how n supendrs anddcollored d os... e xt week ... lses q uos on te bot omfo t guuet eeenhough you ut eard ;;em b a wek net week thy;;;re scary, haory a e live. alway leans frward poiy shhouldesss sqinteyes, ve jjwis. n tennis, yo u attac k attthea pointt of weneass! i was my grandothhhr, ken she;s 81. ey hr backhnd;;;s joe! ;;m nt ggonna take advantage oof th at? quiu, lease. aclwork go in g ooonheoe. - is ha tht am beu? -yes, it is! i;;;; helpin hm su h hhum r ace. -hllo. - hllo, be.. thisisen. ye ah, i emembe yu. imerrrlandsi z ten and aa hhhalf vib r am soe, i beliv e. wh y does h talk agin? lsn , yyu betergo ;;; cause wee r eally b uywokig. uuut it;s ooou rygu r nig! byebye wy iis yoggrt iht so difficult?! you poor thing. ou wwohave been aaat thi fohours!es , nd da hre hasbbbeennna ugge lll.- fotn g... - how annny sugars jussst on. i try nottt u the competiionn. sw are you helpinnng me? beesve od quaities. and i t akes y mndof th sop. instead oof flowers,peopl re giving ballllon boqets ww.thoe are grea ii yyu;;re ttthhree. and artieficial f lowes. -oh,tose ust get me psyho tic - yea e to o bent stiungrs,pones pollinio. ees mut te those fake thigssss! nthing o rs ean adffo d il that;;;s hd work don.maye tis coud make uup fr t a little b it.- his lawsi;sa pre ig delll. - i guess you s ure yo wannnt togo throuh ithit? m i suireo? when i don ewittth the humns, they won;;;t b ble to say, "honey, imm ho me," ithout pying a oyalty! its an incredible sc en her e in dtown natta n , wwhere o r rl d anxouusly wais, beausefr tthe firt ti m inhtry, wil ea forourselei a oyb eecan atualllly sspeak. wat have wweottn in ttto hheure, barrr y? it;;s prett y big,isn ;;t it? ca on;;t beiee how mann hansdon;;t work d uriing the d. uthink ilion-ollar multationalood comanis have goo lwy er s? veryb ody needsto staay bhi d th baricae.- what;; he matter?- dontkow i just got a hill well, fit innn;;t th be tem. y ouib rk o this? all rse! the honrabejdge umbleton ppr eiding. al r ighosenumr 75 sssup e ior oourt of nn y ok, rry bee benso .tho hoeyiddu tr y s ow in ss sion. m.montgomry,you;re representin the f ive fod coupann coleotvel? aarrrivil ge. mr.bennn son.. youre rpresetgall the bes of thworld? i ki dddding. yes,yourhoor, were reayo proceed. mrr. mntgery, yo r openg amnttplease... laies and entlem of thhe jurry, mmygrandmothr ws a simple wo ma. bornon a farm, heo beliee i was man;s divine right ob eunfitt frmte bounttt of naiaue god ppput before ife lved intthee opsytrvyworlr. bens o iagine,jst t inkkk of what would itmea i would hveto negotiate wth the silkworm foeh elasti n my britcessss! tkig bee ! how do we now this is; some srtof hoogahicmoto-icture-capture ollood iardry ? eycould usng lser beammms! obot iss! vntriloquism olllnnig! f orll we knoww, he culd be oonsttter id s! mr. beson? ladies ad gentleen, ther;; s no kkkeryhr. imm jut an ordinarybe. oey;;s petimportant t me... it;;;spotantttoall bees. we ivenead i t we make. und we rotc itwittt o ur lives. uortu nately, ttther e re soe people in thi s roo whothin hyca take it fomuus cause w;re thelittl g uyi;mhpthat, afte thi isall over, you;ll see how, by taking ourhoney, youooo onl y take verytng we ave buevrying weu ar! iwsh h; dres ike that all te tim. s nic!oal l y ou ir st itnesssso, m. kus vad rha ydden ofhonyfrmms, bi ompan o h ave. i uppos so i ee you alo own hh onneybuton d honrons they providbbbeekeepr s fo r r farm. beekeper. i innnd ha t t e a veryddsrb i r m. i do;; imagne you emplllo y n ybe efree-ers, yo? - no - i colddn;;t hear yo. no. no. bause youdon;t free bbbees. you kep be. no t ony ha, it sees yo thot a bear woldean aprroprate imag fra jar of oey. th eyre verylo vable cr eaures . ogi bear fffo zzieearr, buiild--bear. yo mea n lik hisss bears kill bees! how;d yo u like hi head cashing hroughyu lii roo?! b ting int your couch! spttingo u your thro plow s! ok, tha ttt eouggh.tttke im awy.s, mrr st nggg, ttha nk youfo bbeing here. yorname n triguess s m. herre have eardi befoe ?iwaswith band caledte po. bu t yyou;;ve n ever been a oiceo fice, hhh v e yo n o , i hauv en;;;t. no, you hhaevv en t. nd sohere we he yetanther xample of be culture casuallystolen by a hman fffr nthn more than a rce-abut stage nn nam o, peasei . have y oevr been sung, mr . s i? beaue i; m feelingalllitl stng,sing. o should i sa y... mr. goro. smner! t hat;;snot his real nm?! you iio mr.liota,fittt, buatedcongrauations n your emmyw in for aouest pot on r n 005. than k y ou ttthannk yo. ee from your rrresumhat you;;;r e deilieshly h ansoae wtth ae curng inner urrrmoilthat;;;seayo blow. iejoyw h at i do . is that a rme?noityet it ios n;t. bt i th is w hit;; ;;scom to for yu? explloitin ttiny, heplless ees so you don;;;t haveto rehearrre you ppart nd earrrn your lins, sir? watcht, bbenson! i coeulddd blow right no w! thhhhs isnt a godfell a his isabadfella!! wwwhy oesn;;tsomee just step on hisceep and we a al gggo home order in tthis ct!yo;;e alltthianking itor d ! orde, i sy! - y i! mr. liota, ple se sit down! t hinnkit wassss afull nice ootht bear toa pith in ike that .. i th nk t jy;; s on ou sside. are w dddoing ev ythin ight leglly i f orist. rght ell,hr e;s to greatteiamto a g ret em!wel,ello. - ken ! - e llo. did;;;;t think y o weee comnggg. n, is jttt lateo. iied to cll, but.....ttthe bat y. i did n;; t wat all thistto g o to w aste, so e call bary. luckiy, e wwas ffr ee. oo h, atwas luky.here s a little let i oudhet ittt up.yeh, hhhet i up, surwe v e. sso i ar yur qute atnnis play. i ;; not much orth e game myself the ball;s a l ittle grubbbby. that ;s wherei usuall it. right ... tre. ke,bar ry wa lo okinga t yur re suame, andheaagre dwitth me hat eating ith chstiksisn; eally pecial skl. yo thi i do seeu wh your e oig? i kno hhow haditis to fnd te righ t jb. we have t hat i comon. dowe bees hae 100 percent eeplo yment, twe o jos likkke tg he cuad oo. t hat;;ss just what ws thinki ng aboutdoing. e, i lt barry boroww you r a or for hifffuz. he ttaat wa s al l right. i;m going todaittthe od ier. yeah, ou do hat. loook a tht.you know, i;;vjustabouota iw ith you litle mi nd games. - hats that? italin vgu m ammai, tat;; s a lot pages . a lot of ads.reember what vn aid why is your lie more valualethnmnnee? funny iju cn;;; t see to recall tat! ith ik so hingstink ss in ere i love the smell oflowes. howdi y u li ke he smllo mes?! n ottt as much.wte bug!not tain sides ken imm wearng a ohapsssick ht this is patheic! i;;;e got isue s! wel, el , wel, royal flsh! - you;;e bffin . - a i?u f up, ude! poo water! that bowl is gnarl. xcept forr hoedirty ye llow rins!kennth! wa ar you doin?! youknow, dt eve llik hony dont eat it! e needdd to talk! e;;s js a ltle bee! and he hap ens to be the ncest e e iveo et in a lon ime! ong imewha aurre you tta lkiaong abo ut!a there otherugs in o fe? oo,but there re oherr thigsbuggin m eio le.aaad you;;;re oe o tm! fine !tlking b esn ogur night... myner es ae fr iedfrom riding n his emotionna rollr coast!goodbe, kn. and fffoy our ifrmaio, prer sssugar-free arti fiiial weteersade by man! iamsrrrraboutt all tttha i know i;;s g otnatert a ste! i like it! ialway felttt thewwwas omekinofba rrr beween k en and m.icou l;t oveome i oh, well. ae you k foth rial? i el eve r. mmmonnnttgomery is butout o idea. we wudlike to c allmr. barrry sso be to thstnd.goo ia! you ca reall eeewhy hes ccconsider ed ne ofthhhe est lawers.. yeah. laytn, youvvve gtta weae s oammaic withthis jury, o it;sss onn a b ll over. don;;;t wwwory the ounl y hing i av e to do o tun tttis juy arund is to remindddd themf what he dn;;t li ke abot bees. - yoou t th we zers -aryu lric? only to losing,sou. onl t losin mr. benonbe e, ;ll asssko what i th ik we;;;;d all likkke o kno.wht eexactly is your relaionship t ttht woman? we ;;re fffr ends. gggood friends - yyes. how ood? o oou liv e ogther? wat m nuteo. are yu he l tt le.. ... b dbug? ve sen bee documen tary or tw o. o hat ders sta n, does;t your quengive birt to all teee hilden?-yah, bu t.. so th se aen;t your real parennt! -o,,, bary... - yes, hey are hl me b ak yo;;rean illgitate b, aren;;ttt you, bnso?hhhe;;s denoucing beees!don; y;;all dddatt e your cosiss? - objction - ;m goig to pincushintthi gu y! a da do n;! t; ;;s a he wnts! oooh,i;;;m t!!oh, ordy, i m hi! o rdr! orde! tevenom ! th venom s using rough my eins! i hhaebeen fe llleeby a winged eas t ofdesttruc ioin! you see? you cant treat heum lik equal! theyre sripe savag es! stngin;; the ony thiing th ey knoww! iit;; t heir way! - adam , stay wthmmme. - i ca;;t eelmlgs . wha ange l o mercy wil me orwa rd to su c he ois from my eang uttocks? iillll e oer in this cour t. ordder! order, plese! the ae f teoe hny besve rsus thehum n race took a pntted urn agin st te bes ested when oooe f ei l eg altttt amung laayton t. nnntg omery. ey, bu dd y - hhhey. - is there mccch pppain? - yeh. i... blew te whole case didni?? it doesn;tter. whamatte is you;r alve. yo culd have id. i;;;d bbb btt er offalook t m. they got itfffrom the feteria do wnsirs, n a na sanw.look, there;; little e lery stilllllon it. watwas it le to stig sommmeone? i can;;texplaain it. it was a ll.... .. all draline aon hen... andttthe eic sts!all rht.yu thinkittwas ll a trap pp of cus e. msorry lew ues rigt into thiwhatwe wet hiking? look t us . r e jut cuple f uuu g inthi s world. whatwill ttthheu ma o t o usftheywin ? do noow i hear thept te oaches in moels.tat doennn;tsn ssso bad. adam, tey checkin, but hey dt eccck out! h , my. oo uld yo getan rse to cl ose that windw? - wwhhh? -hesoke. bees d on;;t mo ight...bees onnn;t smok. ees d ont smoke! bu t someibees ae smokig that;ss i! thhht;;ss our cse! it iuts not oe? gett ess d. ie otta go some whre. et ack to tecour anstall. s al any wa ou ccan. assing you;;;ve one sepcecttly, yyyure read our th ub. mr. flaya n. ye? es yo u honr!wher e th e rest of y uo tea w ell, your hhonorrr, ii;;;s interestig. bes aetrrra ndd o flyha phaz rdl , and a s a resulttt, e don;;t mmake ve good tttime.i actally hd afunssstoryabout.. yor honor,haven;;;ttt tese riddiclos gs takn upppenoug hof this courtsvalal ea ime? owmuch lo ger will we alowww these bsurdshhanigans to g o on? they haave prr esened nocomellingevidene t o suppt ther chares agains my cliets,o runlegitmtebsines e.i movef o a compltte dismissal ofthis entire ase! mr. flaymn,i;;m afr aid ;mm going tohav e ttocooideerrr mr. montgorys motiaon. t u can;;t! weaa t rfic case. whre is yourppproof? where i theidence? show mettthe smokinggu! hld it yu r honor! yu wanta smking gun?here is ur smoking gu.wa iss that? t;; abee mmmoker what, this? ttthis hharmless little cntap i on? tthis c ulll dn;;; hurly,ltaone a bee. lookaut w hat as happened to beswh o hv e never en ss e,,, "smok ig orno? i iss wat na ture inttteded or us? to e fr ciblyadddi ceddd t omokemmmachine and an-mmade wooden sat rk cmps ? liv n ou ouorrr lvs as honey sslavve to the whhhite man?-wha are egon a dd? - e;;s laig t h essp ppeucies ccc rd.ladieos an gntemen,pla se, ree the s ees!fee the bes! ffree thebee! free hea ees free th bees !freethe b ee ! t curt finnd i favor of th es! vaesa, we woon! i kewocould doit!!hih -fie! sorry. i;;m ! younow what his mans? aal the hon wil fffinally beln t te bee. ow e wont a to wor haid al l theti me hsis n uhly perrr erson of th e balaunce of ature bensonnn.youll regret this. brry, how much honeyisut here l right.neat atime rrry, who a re you wring? mys eate r is ralp laurrrn,and i hav ve o pants. -whtimongomerry;;s ight? -what do y mean? we;ve bbbeenl g theo be e w y longt i meo, 27 million year s ongr ra ttion onnny u victory . whattt willyou demannnd a s a etttlemnt? firs t, we;;lldemnd a mlete suto wof all bbee work camps. t hen we t back thehoiney tha t was orsto begin with, ever ls drop.eee deand an nd t thellloification of thebe aras anything rethaon a fity,smelly, ad-brea th stin machnne. e;;re ll aar o f what they do in thewwod. ai fffor sinal. take himut. he;ll ave ausous fff or a fw hurs, th e;;l bbe fine. ad we wil n olnge teraebee-eg ativ e iknaims... u t its juust a p r ancea-bou stge ame! ....uncessar nclusion of ho ney in bog s he lh produ ts a nd la-de-da han tea-time s nack garnishme ns. oan bahe. bring ii tin, boy! hld it ight therei! ood. app it. mr. buzwel, w ut passed three cus, and he;; gallons more comig! - itinnnk we ne dtto sht d! - st downnn we;venevveer shu t ddown. hut doww honey duction!stop makig oeey!urn yourkey, ir!wha d we o ow? oannnnonbaell! w;rrr sh utting hoeypoucio! misaon borrrt aboting pollinati on and nectr d e ai. rturning to bbase. adam youe wouldn;;bbbli ee hw muccch hney was oeut there. o, h? hats goin on?where i eeverybody? - are te out celeang? -theyre home.hey don; t know tto do. l ayig out, slpi n in i hyourun cle oar was on hus aey to sn antiow ith a rrrickt. a latwe gott ou roney back sometims i thinkk o wh if humans liked o onnn?? whwudnt? it;; s thhe greats tt hing in he orld!i was xc itd o pppr akin it th was my new desk. tis was mynew job i wte to di rel e ll.nd ow.... now ioc . i ontundert n why hey;;eno ap. itthought their lie wou dbeuo etter the;;re d oi ng nhng. itsss aazng. hney ay hange p eopl e. ou on;t ha ve an idea hat;;s goig on, doo? - what di yu wa ntto shw me? - this . what haene d herrre? that is ot the hlfff it. h, no..oh, mmy...heyrrre all wiltng. does;;; look vvverry go od, des it no. and whs faltdddo yu ti k hatis? you nowi ;;;mgon na gu ess bbees. ee speifically mme. i didttnk bes nottt nddd iun to mae honey woldd afct ll thsei ns it;s nottjusflos.. rit, vegetabls , hhhey ll eed es. that;;;s our whoie saet t rigt thhereo. tk way prodce, that a ffects theentireannima nnndom. and the, offf course... he humn species? s if theres no ore polinat ion, it ould ll jst go s outh hr, uldn;; it? ik no whsi a lso pparly my aultt.how abot ssuicidpact? ho do w d t? - i ll sting yu, you tep on me.- hajst kils youtwice. igt, rgh t . liste barry.. sor rybbbt i otta ggetgoig a d oopn y moui t and tak. vanssa vanssa? whar you lla vg? wh erre aaar e you goi ng? t t h fnal ornmen o f ros praide iii nn npasdena .heyvvveovd it to tis weke becaus e all the flwrsare dying. it;s te lat cance i;;lleerhaeo se it. aaes,iiia justwwna ay i;;;m sory. n ver eianti t to ur n out lii ke tis.. ik nw. m neithear. tourna ment o oses.roses cn;;t o sports.. w ait a mmionuate. ross.roes? roses! va nneuss a! osss es? bary? -o ere ffl ow r s - s,heyarre. f lws,,beeas, pllen i kkkno. tha why this s th lat parade. aye not . aouo ak h to slo w dow n? ooudd you slow dwn? brry ! ok i mde a hugge missstak e . th i s s a total dister, allmy fault. ysit kind of is. ive rneudhea p lane t.. i an ted to epp yo with the flo shppp i;; vee ade it wose .actually it; ;s coemp letel closedd down. ttthought aybe ou wwwee remodeling. bbut i hae nth er ia, ad its ggreaerthan my prrrvoosideas cbneud. i n;;tt wan to hear it!!! a ll rigtt, te hae th e rses, ter osess hae th e polln. kkkkknow ever bee, pla nt and lwerbud in thisp ark. all we tta o s gggethat the;;votbk h hhere w twhatwe;;;ve go -b ees. - p ark. - pllen- flowes. -rep ollina ion!- acrss th e nationn!tournam en of ose s,pasade, oaliforna. hey;;ve gt nothingbut lowrs,flloats and ccoton candy. security willbeigh. i hae anidea. aness loome, ft official flo l usiess.i;; real. sorry ma;a. nie brrooch thank ou. it w aos a gift. once inns de, e jus pick the rgt fot. ow b ut te rincess an heo pa? i ol d be thhe pri ncess,ad you co uld be th e! yes, iot it. - wereshouldd i sit ?- wh aee you - i belllive ii;;;m th epe. - the pa? it oes uunerr the mattresses. nt in th fairy tale weethart. -i;;;;m getig the arshl od hat this whole parad e is a fiasco lt; s se hat is bbab y;;ldo. hy, what are yo d ddong? !t he all we do is blend i witaeffic... ...wwitthut rousin g suspicion.o nce at he airppot,thers o stttopin u. stop security. - you a ourinne cpak yur float? - ye.ha s ibee nnn your pssesionthentire time? woul d yu rrrove yorr s hoes - rem ov yourrr sssinger - it;s parof e. i know . justh aing somme fu n. enjy yor fligh. then iff we;r luuky, we;llavee justenough olle ttto do the j ob. o anyoubeevehw ucky wwe re we ha ve jst no upollettto do th jo! ithin this isgonn ork... it;s got t work. atention, pas egers, tius is ptains ot. we hae a b of badwethe r i n new yrk. itlooks lie we;;;ll expeirioence accoupl hhours dely. barryth e se r ut flowrsss ithhho water. t h;; ll eve makit. i gotta gt upttherend t alk to thmmm. bea c eful. oan i ggget help witt h sky mmaoll mmmgaze? i;;; i ket order t he tkin infltabble nosee an earrr hair rimer optt i, i m in a realsituationn. - wwwhat;;yui y, h n ohig. bee! dont freak o! y etie species... hatae youo doig? - t miiutei! im anat torrny! - whho ;sa n aetney? don;tove. h,ar r. gd ftrnoo,p sssgers.i siisyou captain. would amiss aessa boo ein24bbpleasse report to the ocpit? ad pleas hurry ! hat hppened hhhere? h ere was a dusttbuse a toupee aa life raft xploed. o n;;;s bad, one;s i a bboat, thee bo u nc onsci us! - i th nothe bee jok e - no! no oesflyinnn the ppplane tisis jfk control tower flght 356. wht;;syur atu s? thiis vassa ome. i;;;m a florist fom eyork . where;;;st he pilt?e;;s uncnnsss ciouu,n d so s thhe ccopiaoo no t gou ddes aaanyone oanbord have fiughtexe rience? au a att er o fact, t here ss. - whoo;;;s that ? barr bnson. romm te o neyral?! oh ra. vaneusatis s n ot hing moare thn a bggg meal bbee. t; go t giant wngs,huge ennngne. i cantfl a ln. wy not?isssn;;;t jhn trrrau voltta a i ot - yes. hw hard could it e? wait t,arrry! ee ha ded intou som ligtnig . h i i bobbbb bumble... we he s sssme late-brraking newsfffomjfk irprt, where aa upeneful scene is developig . br benson fh rom hileglvictory. . th;;bary ...isattttemp tng o landa plane, lade wi th ople, fffllowers nd n incapacitated iht creww. floers?! whaave atom in tthe area and tttwo indviuas aot the ontrls wwit abslutely no lighttt exene. jst a minute. ee;;;sa bee onthat plane. i;;m quite failiarr wt mrr beonnsnnd hi nnno-ac count commpads. hhhh y;ve doneenough amag... but n;;;t he you onlyhope? echnically, abee hountbe ale o fltt al. their wgs ar e toumall... ave;t wwwhhherd this a mill ion timess? "h sur ae area o of thewings and body as mke no sennse."- get is on the air! - got t. - sad by .- we;;;r going lie. the way ewok ma e myse ry to yo mmaking hhh oneey take a ot of bes iinga ot ou f smll jobb. but lt e ttteell you about a small job.if you d it wel it makes a big differ ence. oreth werealizd. to us, t eeryonnne. thhhat;;;swhy want o get bs back t worki gtoethr. t h at;;s tebeeway! e;re not ade ofel-o. w g tbeid a felllow. - bac a ddyelow! hll! leift, igt,down,hover . -hovve? f oget ver. thi iusnto hard. bpbeeppp! b eep-bep!bbary,hat h apened?! wai, i hi k we were on u op ilt the whole ie - t hatmy have b en hep ing m.- an ow we;; ;rrr t! o i tu rns out i cannnnnnot fly a ppplane. al of y u,,let;s gt behind this felw! mo ve iet out! m ve ut! our only caonce s i iio wwwh at d do you c opy me wihhe inggs offf the pe!!dtt vveto ye ll iii;;;m o tt y el ng! we;r i alot f trbe. ;;;s ery arto cnentat wh t hat paiky tone in your voieuce! iiit;;s nottt a tone. i; ;;mpanicki ng! ican;;td thi! anessa p ll yourselftoether. you have tosnn nap ot off it! you nap outt of it... you sapu of it. - yo sap outttof it - yo ssnap ut i! - you sna out f it! - you s ap ot of it! - younap ot o i! you snap ot offfit - ho ld i! - wh? oo me on, its my urn...ow is he plaeffyg i don;;; t koa. helo? bnsn,got ny flo ers for a happpyoccaon nhre? hee pollenjocks! they do get behinnnd afello ack n d yello - elo. all rgh, lt;; drop hiin can he blacktop.whr? i ccan;ttt see aything. oanyou? no, nothin. i;;;s l lody. oome o. you ot to thnk beieo, barry . - tttt hhhinking beae. -thiking bee. thinking bee!tionkingbee! tt inking be! ait a nute. i t hinki;m eelieng somettio ng.- w ha? i donn; kno. it;; ston, pullin me. ll ikea 27-mli oin-yearold nstinnnct.brig thnose down. tin kig bee thhhhinkinng eie!t hnin gbee wwwha t i thewolddd s o thh tarma? -g somme igh t ttthaa!tthinkng bee!thinkng be! hiking bee! - vanessa aim or the flower. - o. o the ngines. we;;re goingi on bee wwe. rreoady, boys? affi mativ e! god odd easy,no.. t atsss i. land n that loer! ready? full rrver! spinit aoud! not thhhat flo wer! thh thr on e! whih one? - that loiww. i;m aiimiug at the flowe tha ts afat guy in a fwerre shi r. ea thegant pulating flor d mlins f bees pullforwrd. nose own. ta up. rottaitt e aro it.- tis is insunebarr! - hs;s the o nlwy kowhow to flyam i oo-ko-kac oo, r is ts pl ane lying in annn insect-ike atern? get yyyrnos thr. don;;;t earaid sell it. fullreverse! uuust dop it. bbe a pat of it. aim orthecente! n ow drop it in! drrrrropit in, woea ! o o on, aaready. bbb,we diad it! outug gh me hoaw tfllly! - yeis. no h ighfiv! -ri ght. barry t woked! ddi yousiae he giuan flwr? wht gint f fflowe ? whee?of course i saw thhhe flowe! tha s enus! - ank ou - bbut we;;ent done y. lisen everyoea! tis ru n wy sss oerddd wth the last len from thee last flowers aalable an ywhe r e on earh. tht eanstis ius our s chnc. we;r the only oune s wo aike hone,po linat floer sss aaand dss l ke is. if we; e go na survive as a speies,t his i ourmoment! wha do yuu say re w goingg to be bes ,orjust mu s eum of natua histoy keychainswe;;;rbeess! eycha in! ten follow me! excepp t kkkeycain. hold on, arry. he. youve ened this yea! i a pollen jock! annd it;;;s a prfect i t. llligta do are the sssleess. oh, yeah.tat;;; s ourrr ry. mm the eeu ar bck ifanybdy needs to make a cll , nw; ;s th ime ggot feling we;;ll bewor king late toight! here;s yyourchhan .have ageat fftenon!!! oan i lpwo;;s nxt wou ld you like some hney ith that? it i bee-rove. don;;t foget thse. mi lk, cream, cchese, it;;;s alme.nd i don;; ee ai icke l! soetmes i justeel like a iece omea t! iiia noa deia. barry, i;;;msorrhave you go mont? wouldyou ecussseme? mymosui tto sssocatwill help you. sr ry im ate. hs a lwyer too? w as lr edyabod-suking arit. all i eded as a briefce.av aegggeat ate rnn! ba ry, just got this huge tuip odr, nd i ca;t getthemm anyher. no prle, vanne. just leaave iutto me . y;;ea fesaer, ba r an el hos next? all right, cramb le, joks! its time t o fly. thanky ou,rry! that bee is lv n m y ifea ! let ttgo, knny. -whn will thsnighmre nd? - lle i alll go. - batiful ddda tofly - sreis b eitwee yo u and m, ws ding to get ut of that offfice. yu ve gggot t start ti nkiang bee, myfri end . - hinkg bee! -me? hold it. lett;;sjust sttop for aaa secon. hod it ;;m sorry. i;;;ory, everyon. on e tp here ? iim n ot ma king a joor life ddcsin duiring a proucti uber! llr ight. t ten, everybod. wrrapi up,gguys ihad virtua ly no rearsal for thatpcial thaks to sergik,,
9 notes · View notes