#does anyone want her qr code

[cherriiblossomii]

also here’s a mii oc i made when i got tl i call her petal

or her name is also

forehead bb

[tiffyfoundsomething]

We all know I’m a sucker for a blind box.

Folks here may or may not know I collect resin ball jointed dolls. I also like vinyl/abs HJD.

There are blind box BJD.

I ordered a Simon’s Club Toy Campus Series doll on Amazon:  https://amzn.to/3JT66Qy and she was delivered today.

When I first looked through them I chose my favorites knowing FULL well that I would get the one I wanted the least. That’s how it works.

I have a reputation for weirdly good blind bag luck, but that only applies if I’m the one that chooses the box (or if my Son does, then it’s even better luck, which is weird).

It doesn’t work if someone else chooses the package for me.

I wanted basically anyone other than Apple because red and black don’t appeal to me.

I wanted Blueberry most.

I got Apple.

She’s very cute. I am not unhappy about this. I wouldn’t have bought it at all if I actively disliked any of them.

She came with a packet of extra hands, a little dress up card, a sticker sheet with her outfit pieces, a promo card with a QR code, instructions, her outfit, and herself.

The box says they’re hand painted, but that’s certainly at least a stencil. Maybe airbrushed by hand with masks.

She is strung with narrow elastic and has tiny little S hooks in her wrists and ankles.

The instructions say their hats come off but either Apple’s doesn’t or I just haven’t figured it out,  yet.

She is TOP HEAVY and her head flops around a bit. To dress her I had to take her whole head and face off.

She has standard BJD articulation plus a torso joint and double joint peanuts in her knees and elbows.

Her head is 3 parts. 2 hair parts and a face plate, which slides on and off easily from a small retaining plate. Because of the positions of the retaining plate in relation to her eyes, it would be a bit of a pain to modify her to take inset eyes.

I did have to take her head off to dress her. There are instructions on how to take out the face plate retaining.... thing... to facilitate dressing, but I didn’t bother.

The clothes are all hemmed, but not serged and close with Velcro-like tape closures.

She comes with 6 alternate right hands and 2 alternate left hands. I have no idea if they all come with the same hand pack or not.

Swapping the hands isn’t too difficult if you have a tool to help, though it does require a firm pinch-grip so if you have issues with pinch-grip, you may need assistance.

The alternate hands do all seem to be a little bit smaller than the default.

She looks concerned...

Now, a warning.

I’ve been seeing quite a few reports of doll and toy shipments coming by boat from China arriving with visible mold in the packaging (Rainbow High dolls, specifically) with people suspecting they’re getting wet in transit or the cargo containers/ships are infested, and this package absolutely REEKED of mold when it arrived.

There was outer plastic, an outer cardboard box, and then the product’s outer box and the stink made it all the way to the product box.

The box is pretty cute, though, and has a picture of my favorite of the dolls on it, so I’ve put it down in the basement bathroom with my Ozone destinker device to see if I can get rid of that bad smell so that I can keep the box to keep all of her things in together.

We’ll see how that goes.

[gunsli-01]

I want to ask some questions because I've only been riding this train for 5 days.

Why was Haruka voted Innocent in the first place? I would have honestly voted Guilty both times, his crime (particularly the animal m*rder) is just unforgivable, no way to slice that.

Where are you voting with Mu? I'm likely voting Guilty because the outlook she's developing shouldn't be endorsed.

Is there anyone in particular that you believe is hiding too much to make a proper judgement? I feel that way with Mahiru and Kazui, especially the latter.

Mikoto and Kotoko both despise each other and are the biggest threats to Es. Would it be reasonable to use one of them to neutralize the other (1 is Innocent, the other Guilty)?

Well, I feel like a broken record at this point but when I got into Milgram @apatchworkstar introduced me to it and gave me a rundown on how the fan base was responding to the prisoners at that time. So, before answering question one I must implore you to look for opinions regarding that time and decision outside of just mine because what I think could be skewed and is only one side of the story. But luckily, I can answer one and two together.

Haruka Sakurai

1. To my knowledge Haruka was voted innocent because he had been heavily coded as having a learning disability/neurodivergent. The most common speculation being that he had autism. The lyrics in his song combined with his character, description on the Milgram website (you can vote here but you need a twitter or line to do so), and his mannerisms within the portal timeline seem to directly support this interpretation.

His Description as it appears on the website-

2. Though I brought it up in question one but I like to keep things orderly. For anyone interested in voting, it can be done on the Milgram website specifically at https://milgram.jp/judge . Fun fact there's also a QR code in Futa's second trial song that leads directly to the voting page. It crashed the page upon its release.

A young and quiet prisoner who tends to keep his gaze towards the ground. In the beginning he only replied to Es' questioning with very few words and confusion stating that he was unable to answer or understand what was being asked. Through continued communication via their meetings the number of words Haruka understood gradually increased. When solid communication is finally accomplished his personality will become more apparent. He has a gentle temperament and does not show any dissatisfaction towards being in Milgram. He attempts to talk to Es and the other prisoners, but since there's a gap in communication between them, they don't get along too well.

3. I don't think we have enough information about Amane, Kazui, Mahiru, and Futa's crimes at this point. Since their videos have not shown them directly commit them. Yuno also falls into that category. However, in her first trial song Umblical some of the gifts on the staircase have inverted colors which could be alluding to her killing the clients connected to said gifts which is more than these other four have. So, we at least have an inkling she killed someone.

Plus, it's weird that Futa says at a point "The one who spread it wasn't even me anyway." but he continues to focus on the outcome of the doxing in both songs as if he's clinging to the results of that to justify something else, he may have done. Like yeah, he feels guilty about being involved in it, but I don't think that's all he did in the slightest. I think the quicker we get past the smokescreen the faster we'll figure out what he actually did. There's even a line where he asks why we're focusing on that. Sooo.... Kazui is just being vague but I'm pretty sure he did something messed up but I'm bias in his favor so hell if I'll figure out what it is I'm sorry i'm weak to strong shoulders.

Though I suspect he might just be playing house (hah ha get it cause his song is performed like a play where he's the led actor) and never been in a relationship at all but just wanted to be with someone to that extent. I think Mahiru might have poisoned someone given she's a florist, discusses herbal remedies in her interrogation, and the focus on cocktails in this is how to be in love with you.

With Amane all I know for sure is she bludgeoned someone with a metal pipe like Mikoto did with his bat. Because we see her wielding it in Undercover.

Look at them go. If they spent more time together Mikoto could really help her with that swing of hers. Kids truly need proper guidance.

So, it's a bit too vague for me to come to a decision on all of them. Because well they're the best liars here. Like the only thing stopping Yuno from being up there is she wants to be caught. She wants us to figure out what she did and is annoyed that we're turning a blind eye to it when she put that shit on easy mode.

4. Oh, that's a tough one Mikoto has really grown on me, and I enjoy the idea of keeping him as a wild card of sorts. So, I personally would lean more towards voting him Innocent and Kotoko guilty this round. Kotoko states in Harrow that she doesn't care if people attempt to make amends/apologize she'll go after them anyway. That and she's shown to have gone after people who'd already stood trial and were given a slap on the wrist.

So, I'm uncertain if she'll stop attacking people who were voted Guilty last round just because they're voted Innocent this round. It feels like her whole I held back to give you a chance to decide if this is really what you want to do thing is bull and she's just testing Es' resolve if anything. She's already shown disdain at Es' decisions stating they didn't vote enough people guilty for her liking.

This is a case of who's working for who here at that point and at least both Mikoto's respect Es' authority as long as what he's doing isn't detrimental to them. So, even from an objective standpoint I'd rather deal with the guy who has told me how to avoid having issues with him than someone plotting to usurp me as soon as I don't fit their needs. Mikoto will mind his business if we let him, but Kotoko is minding ours and I feel that's overstepping. This is something she's been doing since Mikoto's interrogation.

She broke into the interrogation room, briefly watched Es get folded like laundry, brokered a deal with us afterwards. I bet if we said no and both her and Mikoto got voted Guilty she would've teamed up with him. Because it's not about us agreeing with her it's about her being able to do what she wants. Which literally Yuno tells us that Kotoko is the type to form an opinion all on her then act on it.

That in my opinion is more dangerous to Es and us since Es is our proxy. But when it comes to using one of them to neutralize the other I think we don't have to vote for that to happen. Given Mikoto tried to wish her happy birthday last year to which she responded and I'm paraphrasing here that something like him didn't deserve to exist he definitely would never be voted innocent and once he was voted guilty again she would finish him off. Something, she's incapable of doing while he is unrestrained because he was the only one to successfully push her back when she attacked.

This means Kotoko is banking on him being voted guilty so he will finally be restrained and unable to defend himself. So, she can kill him. Cause she's a coward who likes jumping people who are already defenseless with multiple weapons like a police baton, steel toed boots, and iron knuckles. So, honestly if you want to go that course and pick a side...

Well, I really hope it's Mikoto's because I don't know... I still hate police brutality even when it's done by women. I might be crazy but maybe more people in 2023 should too. Instead of going oh yeah girlboss moment maybe more people should go oh whoa hold on that's a narc. That's the person who disobeys authority until they become the authority at which point, they can never be wrong.

Like the shit she's doing and saying right now is fucked up regardless of how you feel about the other characters this is disproportionate punishment. Given the fact the fact that there is already a punishment system in Milgram and she's blatantly trying to replace it with her own form of punishment. That's a coup, that's disrespect, she's already stepped into our jurisdiction and she's just waiting to see if we roll over and say it's okay. After which she's going to kill someone and then say we told her to if she's voted innocent like fuck that I'm not about to be an accomplice. The other Mikoto that jumps us just wants us to stop stressing him out, something that we have direct control over, so I really don't understand why we just don't stop doing things that cause him to show up. Though I'm also an asshole with characters I like so people could be nice or make his ass worse either way I'd still be eating good.

However, Kotoko is a problem for everyone in Milgram and it'd probably be great for her to be told no by someone who can actually enforce that decision for once in her life. Especially given this line of hers, "From the beginning, I never asked for your understanding! My actions, one by one, are bringing the earth closer to peace. Useless weaklings should just shut up and let me protect them!" When you girlboss so hard you become a girldictator.

Sorry, if this is a long answer but there's just so many interesting variables. Given Mikoto's personality it seems like if he is voted innocent he wouldn't really go on the offensive unless Kotoko attacked him. Which she just might do anyhow since she seems to fucking hate him. However, I wouldn't want anyone here to die to her of all people...so it's really hard to give a definitive answer on.

I just feel it'd be easier and safer to vote Kotoko Guilty given she's already attempted to take Es' job multiple times. Plus, we can't guarantee where the writer will go with the verdicts especially given other innocent parties can and will probably intervene. Best course of action in my opinion is to vote Mikoto and Kazui the two people capable of handling her innocent and her Guilty. If you're concerned about Es' safety and ability to do their job. But like Jackalope said we could also just vote them all guilty but then we might have a prison riot.

[thejeonginshands]

Secret Love Song | BangChan

(you can scan the QR code to get the Playlist)

Materlist | Synopsis | Part 2

Warning: This story may contain foul language and misuse of words, along with explicit erotic narration, please don't be rude about it. I don't want to sexualize any of the idols used in this story, please know how to separate fiction from reality, so don't make a drama in a glass of water. There will be spelling mistakes so don't make a crazy scene about it either, the story will be corrected when it's finished.

seohae's house, 2021

Being an idol was never easy for anyone, the fact of having to be deprived of the things you used to do, to be made to change the way you express yourself, the way you laugh, the way you joke, the way you dress, the way you sing; the simple fact of being a project for someone else is undoubtedly what makes being an idol so complicated and many times, unbearable. Seohae didn't quite know the consequences her unsupervised actions would cause on her career. She had only been the leader of DREAMS for a year and a few months and when she turned on her cell phone and the first thing she saw was an article talking about her saying that Bangchan was unattractive, it was a blow to her face.

Seohae was the most active when it came to doing vlives or just hanging out with her fans, she had a good time with them and loved too share how she did back in the day, talk about anything as if they were family, and they were. Seohae would always be there for her fans and they would always be there for her, that's how the roles were and survival was enjoyable. Seohae being the one who does the most vlives tends a lot to talk about other idols or answer questions she's not supposed to ask. For a female idol to talk about a male group was impressive. So when she was asked if Bangchan looked cute to her, she was honest about it. She said no.

But why was she being attacked so much, were there really people out there who think everyone likes their biases or just the boys themselves? Seohae didn't consider herself a girl who enjoys watching guys doing anything, let alone women, she was just neutral. And everyone realized that when Seohae and her members saw an idol ripping her shirt off at an awards show and the entire audience burst into screams and there were many girls who even almost fainted. Why were people getting excited about that? It was an abdomen, there was nothing more exciting to watch.

But she never thought she would be attacked for that, and taking clips of her "hating" men out of context and getting more people who don't even know her… insulting and judging her. Seohae didn't hate men like people out there say about her, those compilations were just moments where she was caught off guard or just plain serious. She didn't hate anyone, least of all because of her gender.

So to be attacked by Stay and others just for saying that Bangchan didn't think she was handsome was a surprise to her. No doubt something that would affect her good relationship with the CEOS's.

━Good morning. ━Yeji enters the room with a plate of chopped fruit and plops down on the bed of his leader who was checking his cell phone.

━Ah, yeah ━Still reading, Yeji peeks out to see what she was seeing. ━What are you doing?

━Nothing. Just wondering what's got you so into that cell phone, you hate using it in the morning, you said it gets heavy on you. ━Seohae turned it off and put it down on the bed running her hand over her face. ━Tell me what's wrong with you, Hae. You know you can simply lean on me whenever you feel frustrated or sad.

━You haven't heard anything? Everyone is talking about me and claiming things I didn't say about Bangchan. ━Yeji frowns. ━Listen to this title, it's nonsense. "DREAMS leader says Bangchan from Stray Kids is ugly and he doesn't understand why they do so much drama"… I never said that, God!

━ I don't know why you're surprised, Hae. Yellow presses, it's nothing new. ━Shrugs. ━Don't pay attention to those things, they'll only make you feel worse, okay? Distract yourself, but first you should talk to the CEO's, because you can't defend yourself alone, you need them.

━Agh, I know, you think I don't? It's all I've been thinking about these days. But I'm too surprised how a simple comment of mine made half the country angry. ━Yeji laughs. ━It's the bigotry effect, isn't it? I got a lesson that messing with male idols is a lousy idea. Can you imagine them listening to me when I address the Seventeen guys? Nope, they'd cancel me in a heartbeat.

━You're right about that. Hey… ━Seohae sets his gaze on her, watching her eat her fruits like there's no tomorrow. Yeji was a fruit lover, he loved them. Whenever shopping to fill the pantry the first thing on the list was definitely fruits and Miyeon's typical spicy ramen. ━Where are the two brats in the house? It feels empty without the two of them.

Seohae stands up to look for what to wear, as even being the most famous on the Internet these days her work as an artist was not over, far from it, she has not had a break. She had to go back to her daily life, being in bed having the upcoming comeback on her back was not an option.

━Both of them went for a photoshoot, don't you remember? They excitedly told you about it while you were playing Minecraft in your room. ━Yeji denies. ━I'm not really surprised. You should start paying more attention to them, they're our juniors, okay?

She just shrugs her shoulders.

━It's not my obligation, shall we go to the company? I have to look for some clues I left with Woozi and he told me he's there. ━Seohae stop looking for clothes to see her.

━Even without having to look for those clues, we must go. We have the comeback on our shoulders, and the CEO's expect a lot of things from us, we should try our hardest. Can I borrow your black outfit? I can't find anything I haven't already worn. I must urgently go shopping. ━Yeji just shrugged his shoulders.

━Do whatever you want. I just don't want to get out of this bed. ━She lay down lying down, Seohae ignored her going to her elder's room next to hers and searched through the pigsty she had that outfit she's been trying to steal from him for months. Returning to her room she sees Yeji with his cell phone over his face and typing like never before. ━ Apparently they must be doing an interview, because Haneul just texted me asking me to lend him a million won.

━So what did you say? Tell me you didn't send him a swear word. ━Yeji laughs. ━Jeon Yeji!

━But I didn't even tell you that I replied to him! Don't scold me!

━I know you!

━Not well enough, apparently. I told him no and a point, if I had said yes the fans wouldn't have believed it. They know me, you know that. ━Seohae sighed heavily. ━If you keep this up you're going to get old soon.

━How can you not? I understand the leaders now, this is hard. Having to take care of other unruly, chaotic and rude children is complicated. ━Yeji rolled his eyes.

━I'm older than you, Seohae.

━When it suits you. ━The rapper just stands up and spanks him to finish leaving the room. ━Change quickly!

━ Yes, yes, grandma!

. . .

When Yeji and Seohae arrived at the company after managing to pass the big wave of paparazzi who were only throwing questions about Bangchan's gossip. The truth is that Seohae didn't know what to do with her life, she was dying of embarrassment to think how Bangchan reacted when he woke up and found that an idol said that he doesn't look attractive to her. Thousands of assumptions went through his head, but none of them could be the true one because Seohae didn't really know Bangchan.

━Tsk, those motherfuckers. ━Seohae gave a shove to her companion who only whined about it. ━They piss me off that they say so much idiocy just to stir up more controversy. I will never understand them. It weighs down my existence to have to run into them.

━Don't be rude, they're just doing their job. ━Yeji gave her a dirty look. ━Fuck it, but they do it. They have no choice but to meddle in other people's private lives so they don't get fired. Leaving that topic aside because it stresses me out, are we going to finish composing the song for the comeback today? It's still a little while to finish it, the other time we were forced to sleep by Miyeon and Haneul.

━I can't believe they lied to us with another sleeping time. Because of them the whole idea I had for the lyrics slipped my mind and now I have to think of new ones. Ugh. ━They both get into the elevator after security saw their identities and allowed them to enter the building completely. ━By the way, you should call my aunt. She's worried about all this controversy with Bangchan and stuff. She told me she read a lot of hate messages to you.

━I told Mom not to read those things, she always worries about it and it makes Dad crazy. They both freak out and always end up crying thinking I might be having a bad time or I don't know ━Yeji nods. ━I'll call her later. I've told her like a thousand times that those things don't affect me, I don't use Twitter or any social media like your hate comments get to me and so do you guys. We don't read them and life goes on.

━Miyeon and Haneul created an Instagram about a week ago so maybe the comments will get to you. They created one for me but it looks like Vernon's, not one point I got because I told them I wasn't going to use it. It's a boring app, I'd rather build little houses in minecraft than upload pics of myself.

━Poor the ones that have you as bias. ━Yeji burst out laughing. Both of them still talking arrived at the practice room which was completely empty, Seohae went inside this one throwing her coat somewhere and getting ready to warm up and start rehearsing. Yeji did the opposite. She plopped down lying on the floor looking at the ceiling. ━What are we going to do for your mom's birthday, I haven't seen you thinking about it or asking for our help.

━It's because I haven't thought about it, nor do I want to. ━Yeji and her mother got along terribly, her mother took it upon herself all her life to shit on her dream of being a rapper and used to tell her a lot that she was never going to make it which caused their relationship to go down the toilet. ━And don't you dare tell me the usual, because I don't want to fix our relationship. There's no point. We're both fine that way.

━It was a long time ago, Yeji. At least talk to each other once, I don't know. You're mother and daughter. ━Yeji denied.

━Don't insist. I don't want to and I won't. Period. ━Seohae didn't say anything else again, both girls heard a bustle and without being able to get ready into the room came Haneul and Miyeon laughing with each other and wearing quite comfortable training clothes. ━They look happy.

━We are, obviously. Everything went great, plus the pictures turned out great. It was great. ━Speaks Miyeon plopping down on the floor and laying her head on Yeji's lap who didn't complain about it. ━What were they talking about? I feel a tension in the air, did they argue?

━Not at all, Miy, stop being so nosy. ━she sticks her tongue out at Seohae. ━Since it's the four of us, it's time for us to start rehearsing. We should be ready for the comeback. ━he adds standing up, the two newcomers whimper kicking but stand up following their leader's instructions.

━Are we not going to wait for Mr. Hong ━mentions Haneul standing with his arms crossed.

━He has the day off, but he taught me the choreography earlier and I can be the trainer today. ━The remaining three nod. ━Miyeon, I want you here in front for being the main dancer.

━Okay.

. . .

The early morning came faster than Seohae wanted it to all day, she along with Yeji were locked in the agency's studio finishing the song for the comeback which miraculously turned out spectacular. Seohae saw her cell phone screen where several messages from Miyeon and Haneul were the first thing she saw, along with her wallpaper of her together with Joshua ━which the same guy put up because she lost a bet━ and then the time. Four in the morning.

Yeji was completely asleep on the furniture behind her with several papers on top of her body and her arm out of the furniture. A few knocks on her door made her get up from the swivel chair and walk towards it, as she opened it she runs into Seungcheol and Joshua outside dressed to leave the building. They both saw Yeji asleep and decided to talk quietly.

━Hey, it's late, are you guys done composing yet? ━says Joshua worriedly, Seohae yawns and nods.

━We already finished about an hour ago, but I got to check some tracks and the time flew by. My butt and back hurt too much. ━Joshua rolls his eyes because of his zero filter when talking, while Seungcheol went inside the studio. ━You guys just finished?

━Yes, we were quite a while waiting for Woozi hyung to go home all together, are you coming with us, where are Yeonnie and Han? ━The Seventeen boys had cute nicknames for each member of the group, being older they treated them like their younger sisters and were very affectionate with them, which was what made them all become such good friends and they were like a family.

━They are at home. We took care of sending them so they're not here wasting time, if they were still here we wouldn't have been able to finish the song because they'd be "Are you done? We're sleepyoo" ━imitates the voice of their juniors and Joshua laughs.

They both look at Seungcheol trying to wake up the rapper from the girl group, receiving a slight push from her and her back to him still asleep.

━This woman is impossible. ━he laughs, Seohae imitates him. ━I'll carry her on my back. Help me Shua. ━The boy nods walking inside to help him. Seohae takes his coat and backpack where both of their dirty clothes were inside, he equally takes his cell phone and turns off the computers. He sees his best friend place his partner on his partner's back and Seungcheol starts to accommodate her.

The four leave the studio walking towards the exit of the building where they just met some members of the male group who upon seeing Seohae and Yeji were happy to greet them, but upon seeing the sleeping rapper only greeted the leader.

━Wa, Seohae, you look terrible. ━le tells Woozi.

━And you look midget. ━he sticks out his tongue, Woozi just bursts out laughing. ━Where's Dino? I haven't seen him for days, I'm tired of always meeting his boring faces.

━Dino left with the others, he was dead sleepy and kept bugging us so we got rid of him. ━ Jeonghan replies. ━And you should be thankful that they see us, many cry because they can't.

━Yeah, right. ━she replies teasingly, earning a light shove from DK who didn't help but laugh, as usual.

━Hey, how are you doing with everything that's been going around about you and Stray Kids' leader ━asks Minghao who was drinking a coffee in the most relaxed way. What Seohae loved about the guys was that they always cared about her and the other members, and didn't get into anything private that might make them uncomfortable, they always sought to make them feel comfortable.

━Agh, Min, don't ask me that. Embarrassment is eating me up inside. ━The appointee laughs lightly.

━You don't have to feel that way, we've all had something similar happen to us, it's part of growing up in the industry. ━Seungcheol shrugs. ━Besides, it could have been worse, so be thankful that your first gossip is something as silly as that. I know idols who have had terrible gossip, enough to make them want their exit from the group.

━Cheol is right. ━he gives him Woozi's right. Joshua walks over to the girl placing his arm on her shoulder and hugging her for comfort. ━Have you talked it over with the CEO's yet? I'm surprised they haven't sent for you yet or something.

━I talked it over this afternoon when I finished rehearsing. They weren't mad at me which reassured me, they're going to speak up for me and take care of the emails my fans send. ━The guys nod. When they get to the exit, they get into the male group's car so they can go home. Both groups live in the same building so they always went together and it was easier for them to find each other. ━Eh, Jeonghan, don't think I forgot that you owe me twenty thousand won.

━Agh, I thought you were going to forget. ━This one complains. ━I'll give it to you when we get there, I don't have my wallet with me now.

━Why do you owe him money? ━asks Minghao.

━We bet I didn't dare not to cheat in the next Going Seventeen, but I did. ━says the boy and the whole car fills with laughter.

━You're such a cheater, I don't know how they put up with it. ━says Seohae looking straight ahead again.

━I'm wonderful, Seohae, deal with it. ━says this one in her ear, causing her to push him away.

The girl ignores the guys to grab her cell phone so she can check her minors' messages, she saw that Haneul sent her a link of a news and seeing what it was the device fell from her hands to the floor of the car drawing everyone's attention.

━What's wrong ━asks Joshua.

She with a terrified face looks at him and then at the others who looked concerned.

━Bangchan talked about me in his Chan's room.

[anauthorslife]

Your assistance is needed. Living With Disabilities is working towards creating a facility for students who are struggling with their assignments. If no human should go hungry, no student should struggle with their assignments. This is what the host, Katrina Smith, experiences, and she does not want anyone who comes after her to fall in those footsteps. Every person deserves the proper key to reaching success, and in order for that key to be created, Katrina needs to reach out and spread the message.

She's the only person working toward getting it started. Yet she needs your help in getting there. Your donation counts, big or small. Scan the QR Code to make your donation.

Don't forget to follow Living With Disabilities on IG @livingwithdisabilities

[yutahoes]

Cupid

pairing : single dad! Yuta Nakamoto x Y/N

word count : 1.2k words

genre : fluff

Based on this ask, not that techy Yuta drabble. 

There is a reason why Yuta hated going to the mall with his daughter. Don't get him wrong. He loves Keiko more than his life. But the overly enthusiastic child would always tire him out. "Daddy, look!" his daughter called, pointing at something in the toy store. "It's a unicorn!" 

True enough there was a white and purple unicorn robot walking on the aisle. He whispered a curse before calling for Keiko as she ran to where the toy is. The little girl watched in awe as the unicorn walked, even making sounds like asking for her name and asking if she wanted to be friends. Yuta was startled, toys can talk now? "Can I try?" The younger girl asked the female holding a tablet who just nodded and handed her the gadget. 

"Oh no, Kei." Yuta said, taking the tablet and handing it back to the girl. "You might break it." 

The younger's eyes were tearing up. "I won't." She said while breathing heavily. "I just wanted to have a unicorn." She rubbed her eyes, her voice coming off as a whisper. "You promised you're going to buy me a unicorn because you cannot bring mommy back." 

And he hates it when Keiko uses this reason to get what she wants. His mom was right, she's growing spoiled. 

The girl on the counter gave him an apologetic look as she handed the box of the unicorn toy which he already bought. "There's a step-by-step instruction and a QR Code for the video to learn how to assemble this robot." She explained and he just nodded, keeping an eye on his daughter who was playing in the ball pit area of the toy store. She handed a card which has the company name and the number. "If you have trouble, you can call this number." Yuta nodded, getting the box before calling for Keiko to go home. 

He already spent money on her unicorn. He had to get her home immediately.

Keiko was so excited to play with the unicorn that she kept on telling Yuta to open the box and assemble it for her. But it was more difficult than he thought. Why is assembling a toy so complicated? With wires, screws, and even programming that only hurt his head. “Does this mean I won’t have a unicorn?” she said with quivering lips. Oh no, she’s going to cry. 

He saw the card that was given to him, “We’re going to call for someone to help.” But Keiko was already crying that made him sigh. Why is it this hard to take care of a daughter? 

The doorbell can be heard while he’s making some snacks for his daughter who still refused to talk to him. A girl, in glasses and in uniform, smiled at him then introduced herself as a technician of the company where the toy was made. Yuta let her in, glancing at his daughter who was wide-eyed at the visitor. “I’m sorry I had to call. I don’t know what to do about the toy.” He said then returned with the box of the robot unicorn. 

“No worries.” She said while taking out the parts from the box. “Can I borrow a screwdriver?” 

Yuta nodded before disappearing to the kitchen where his tools are. He heard his daughter’s faint voice but can’t make up what she was saying. When he appeared in the living room, the girl was seated on the floor next to his daughter while telling her the parts of the robot. “I’ll just get something to eat. Please let me know if you need anything.” Again, she smiled before handing the little girl a piece of the robot. 

He took some juice from the fridge, smearing peanut butter on the sandwich when his daughter’s voice caught his attention. “You’re so cool. You’re cooler than my dad.” He rolled his eyes before a laugh took his attention. That was one infectious laugh. 

When he returned to the living room, Keiko was already sitting on her lap and helping her with the screw. Funny, Keiko had never been close to anyone like that before. The body of the unicorn is almost done that startled him. It was like a puzzle piece and he doesn’t have the patience to do it. Even Keiko was frustrated when she cannot put one part to another but he watched as his daughter carefully tighten the screws as if she had been doing it all her life. “This is fun.” The younger girl exclaimed in delight, giggling at what she was doing. 

Yuta excused himself to do some things around the house while the younger girl is occupied. Hearing her laugh and bond with another girl surprised him, she’s different when she’s with him. This might be the first time, since her mother left, that he saw how happy she is. “Daddy!” Keiko called from the stairs. “Y/N unnie wants to borrow your phone.” She’s calling her unnie now? And Y/N? The name sounds pretty. 

He handed the phone to his daughter and watched her run down the stairs, even hearing a female voice to be careful. He never thought he’ll miss having an adult female in the house. It wasn’t even a minute that passed when he heard a robotic voice greeting ‘good day’ and the younger girl shouting in delight. Yuta went down the stairs to check what happened and even if the unicorn was walking to where he is, he stopped at the sight of Keiko hugging Y/N. “Thank you, unnie. You’re the best.” 

“I’m just doing my job, Kei.” The older guy smiled. She let the older call her Kei, a name she doesn’t want anyone, even her friends, to call her. “Now you can play with your unicorn.” 

What did she do to get his daughter’s affection? Is it the unicorn? Keiko happily took the phone from her hands, clicking on the screen to make the unicorn say different words and it makes her giggle each time. “Thank you. You’re a lifesaver, Y/N.” Surprise can be seen on her face. So cute. “Do you want to stay for dinner?” 

“Do you want to stay forever?” Keiko asked that made the two of you turn to her. Yuta was surprised, does she like her that much? “Oh, I was asking the unicorn but you can stay forever and be my mommy, unnie.” 

“Keiko!” Yuta called and she argued that she’s pretty. Y/N giggled. “I’m sorry about her but I’ll count you in for dinner.” The girl nodded before Yuta disappeared to the kitchen. 

He can only hear whispered voices and the unicorn saying words like ‘Nice to meet you’ and ‘Do you want to be friends?’ “Unnie, do you think daddy is handsome?” The older girl just chuckled, that lovely sound that resonated through the whole house.

Yuta wanted to call his daughter’s attention for saying something unbelievable but what the older girl said surprised him, “Aren’t you a charmer, Kei?” God, it must be a sign. That was what Keiko’s mom would always tell him when they were dating. 

“I can play cupid for you and daddy.” And he knew once Keiko wants, she’ll surely get.  

Part Two

[cherriiblossomii]

does anyone wants my miisona qr code

be careful if you add her in your island tho she can cause chaos /j

[thecandywrites]

Monster March Day 1- Mermaid- Mico Mermaid Taliwai and Brivian Part 2

And the second and final part to my Monster March submission for @catbatart ‘s Monster March 2022. So again, a long part, but I couldn’t help it. Also plus size mermaids? Yes, please and thank you. Cause our girl Taliwai is THICC. She’s a big beautiful woman and SO SEXY. And our boy Brivian doesn’t stand a chance because she’s beautiful inside and out and it’s her personality that does him in and has him throwing every idea and every doubt out the window to be with her. 

Sorry this is posting on like day three of the Monster March but I only had a few ideas for the whole month, so while I would love to have a submission for every day of it, I just don’t have the time or the mental capacity for it. But new mermaid content so yay!

Monster March 

Day 1- Mermaid - Micro Mermaids!

Taliwai the Surrogate

“So where is the puzzle box for Brivian’s safety?” Brivian’s parents asked Ethel as she came to check up on them a few days before they would be released into the big courting tank.

“Ok, I need to talk to all of the last generation micros- can all of you get into one tank?” She asked before the parents and their last child swam through the tubes and into Brivian’s tank as Ethel pulled up a stool to sit and be eye level with them.  

“Ok, so for this batch, I am running a multi-variance test. I want to test to see if it’s actually the puzzle box cages that incite the mobs of suitors. And since all of you young ones will be wearing these…” Ethel began as she picked up and pointed to the QR code that was laminated and prepped to be worn like a backpack. 

“I am testing to see if anyone can even tell if you’re last generation micros or not. So my plan is- for all the boys to get together- and form a clutch of your own. All the girls, I want all of you to form a clutch of your own. So that when you are introduced into the big tank- it will appear that you are no different than any other middle clutch and are simply either a male only clutch or a female only clutch. Which isn’t unusual and because there’s not a lot of you, you will still get preference as an elder clutch. But you’ll be able to roam the entire tank freely and possibly either pair up with each other or any other from any other clutch.” Ethel explained as the last generation micro’s were surprised but excited about the prospect of for once, not having to be either advantaged or disadvantaged by the pairing and could find a suitable mate that was much more suited to them instead of trying to pick one under extreme pressure. 

“However I’m also testing to see if any of you or any other could have the potential to be surrogates. Since being a surrogate parent is very challenging but also very rewarding. But for once, being a surrogate father does not mean that the male would be impotent. If anything I’m looking for very virile males for the project because the goal would be to have a pair breed whole clutches of surrogate parents because your species and your various subspecies really need the surrogates. Especially = since Lagu and Navere’s deaths. Now if that is something that none of you want to do, I understand. I am giving the surrogate offer to all the other batches to see if any of them want to volunteer. But I can tell you that volunteers will not only get large premium tanks, premium decor and premium food and premium choices of a nest or nests as needed and could potentially come with the option to travel to any number of aquariums around the world that could need you. But it’s still very much a voluntary choice that each individual would have to consider carefully and you don’t need to answer me right now, simply think about it for the next couple of days while you finish preparing. I only want each and every single one of you to be happy with whatever choice you make. However- if any of you does come under threat of being mobbed by suitors, I will not hesitate to put the individual into a puzzle compartment for their safety. And all of you are extremely well educated, I’m sure it won’t take much for any of you to figure them out on your own.” Ethel explained. 

“Oh.” They all blinked in surprise. 

“I will leave the tubes open for the rest of the day, talk about it amongst yourselves, weigh the possible choices carefully and of course, you’ll have to use the utmost discretion when in the big courting tank with other potential mates. But also keep in mind, I’m also allowing those who chose to be surrogates to also swim freely among everyone else too. And they will not have any indicators about whether or not they’ve chosen to be surrogates or not. And only through the courting process would you find that out and if any of you chooses a surrogate mate, you will have to choose between keeping that mate and being in the surrogate program with them or choosing another mate who isn’t in the surrogate program.” Ethel warned them. 

“Ok.” They all nodded before they all sat down in a group on the soft sand to talk it over before Ethel left and made the surrogate announcement to the other tanks before she came up to your tank and gave the surrogate proposal to you and your siblings as well before you eagerly raised your hand, swam forward and volunteered. 

“I want to be a surrogate. My parents have had nothing but the highest praise about Lagu and Navere and they were of course very saddened to hear that they passed away. I want to volunteer. I don’t care about the tank or the food or anything else. If Navere and Lagu saved my parents and since so many of my older siblings are in the surrogate program and have already flown to other aquariums around the world and are as happy as they seem when we’ve seen them on the calls on the screens. I want to do that too. I want to help.” You insisted. 

“Oh sweet, sweet Taliwai, of course! Of course! I’m so happy you volunteered and the first to do so! Because you’re the first- I have the perfect tank already ready to go just for you then.” Ethel cooed which surprised you. 

“Can I see it?” You asked. 

“Of course, and any other who is thinking about it, can come and see it too if you want to.” She said as she put the net in the tank as you and all of your brothers and sisters squeezed into the net with you. All of you laughing hysterically trying to cram into the net. It was like playing minnows in a hole with the net as Ethel giggled delightfully. 

“OK, now big breath in.” Ethel coached as all of you took a deep breath in and held it as she lifted all of you the net out of your tank and into a bag before you all swam out of the net and then Ethel very carefully carried you and your siblings towards the tank.

Diavien and the other last generations noticed that a whole brood was being moved from their parents tank and watched on curiously before Diavien and the others curiously swam through the tubes of the other tanks that they could to see where you and your siblings were being taken. 

Ethel then put your bag into a tank that was just around the corner since this was a very large room with several “cubbies” for each variety, species and subspecies of micros per cubby. It was the tank she had used to house Navere and Lagu but since their deaths, she had upgraded the tank with their own life insurance money. Because of how they died- since their fatal encounter had been on camera and recorded. And now this tank was practically a work of art. The only other salt water tank in Ethel’s house that even compared to this- was the “retirement” salt water tank in her own bedroom. And that was only because that tank was bigger as all of you had your hands and faces practically smooshed up to the plastic bag looking at all of it as all of you chittered exctedly at what you saw.

“So because you were the first to volunteer Taliwai, this will be your tank. And then once you pair up- your mate will be moved in here with you. And the rest of you. If you chose to be surrogates too, you can get a tank like this too. I already have other caretakers who are part of the project and they are just now finishing up their own tanks too and some of their tanks are just as nice as this one is.” She specified as you felt almost overwhelmed that such a big, wonderful tank would be yours as it filled you with pride, joy and excitement. 

“Now, I’m counting on all of you to protect Taliwai when you guys go into the big pairing tank. Because if word gets out that this is her tank- so many mermen will be after her- just to live in this tank- that won’t be all that interested in her or interested in the surrogate program. And I need willing volunteers in the program, I don’t want to have to draft anyone into it. So here’s the story I want all of you to have. Taliwai- if you want to tell others that you’ve volunteered to be a surrogate, that’s fine. But simply say that ‘you don’t know what tank you’re going to or that you’re going to be shipped out to a university’ or something. But the entire mandarin dragonet micro cubby just saw all of you being brought to this tank. That means that you and your batch will get special interest from everyone else in the courting tank. So if any of you get bombarded or swarmed by suitors, I can put you in a puzzle compartment for your safety. Where I can walk you through how to open and close it. And while it will protect you, it will also single you out and seclude you from everything else in the big tank. Just like last generation micros usually have to be ok?” Ethel coached you. 

“Ok.” All of you nodded before the water had acclimated and she let you loose to explore the tank as you and your siblings eagerly inspected every square inch of it. All of you laughing and squealing in delight as you explored the massive tank and all of it’s wonderful treasures that not even your parent’s tank got to have.  

“It’s so big!” All of your voices practically echoed in the waters as you happily touched the different kinds of coral, from hard to leathery to soft as the soft corals especially were like touching and hugging and even laying on the softest, bounciest sea sponge. And this tank even had sea sponges too! And an actual bedroom space that had a big seasponge as it’s mattress to that oversaw a large empty space. 

This tank had everything. It had it’s own sweet seagrape algae plant too! But thankfully no anemones or anything else dangerous but it did have several algae eating shrimp and a nice mix of special snails to keep the algae on the glass in check and even a few “pets” that would act like garbage disposals for uneaten food or waste. While phytoplankton would be regularly dumped into the water at night to help feed the corals too. And it even had several varieties of crustations that were mandarin micro’s favorite prey and food in the wild too. 

“Don’t eat the prey items. Those are for Taliwai and her future mate to teach their children how to hunt because the goal is for them to teach their children skills that would help them and their future offspring into the ‘reintroduction into the wild’ program so that they will have the best of both the domesticated world and the best of both worlds.” She specified as many of you had already gotten into hunting and stalking positions which earned dissappointed murmures from everyone else. 

“But there is nothing in here that would ever pose Taliwai, her mate or any children either that are naturally theirs or any they would foster in the surrogate program- harm.” Ethel emphasized as you and your siblings had all decended on the sweet seagrape plant.   

“Oh my fins.” You and your siblings practically moaned while all of you eagerly picked “ripe” seagrapes, the sweet flavor exploding in your mouths before you noticed a huge area of the tank was unusually bare. 

“Is this where the nest goes?” You asked Ethel as you noticed that the bedroom faced this empty space. 

“It is. When you choose your mate, I’ll let you choose whatever nest you want, I have the most promising candidates just there.” She said as she pointed to the huge shelf right across from the tank that had shelf after shelf of special geodes of all kinds and sizes just waiting to be chosen. 

“Although if you’re going to be a surrogate- the bigger the nest, the better. Especially one with several dips and curves for when you get surrendered clutches, you and your mate can move the eggs- granted- very carefully over from where they will be nested from into your nest. But be warned- being a surrogate, you have to be ready and willing to take on any clutch I put in here. And the clutches that might go in here, may not even be from mandarin dragonet. Until I get more surrogates for the the other species and varieties, you might get babies of all kinds. That’s why this tank is so big and has so much and has seaweed and coral from all over the world- because you might get clutches from areas of the world that you may not call home. But they will still need to have you tie them to their roots if their parents aren’t around to do so. Are you sure you’re up for that?” She reminded you as you nodded before you saw the nest from the glass as you pressed your body up to the glass. 

“See a nest that already speaks to you?” Ethel asked as you nodded. 

“Ok, which one?” Ethel asked as she went over and started slowly moving her pointer finger from geode to geode as you shook your head before she pointed to the one that caught your eye and your imagination before you nodded emphatically before she smiled brightly. 

“Theo! Help me with this nest Taliwai just picked out.” Ethel called out before Theo came in and picked up the big and heavy geode. 

“She has a good eye and a really big heart.” Theo praised as he very carefully put it into the tank and the geode took up every little bit of the empty spot as you were the first to explore it before you laid back into the birthing bed and stretched and relaxed into the chair. 

It was perfect.  

“Aww,” your siblings cooed. 

“You could fit like over 500 eggs in here!” Your brothers realized. 

“Yup and she will need every spot.” Ethel nodded. 

“Oh my gills. If she is going to be looking after potentially over 500 eggs at once, she’s gonna need help. Can I volunteer to be in here with her? Because surely, this tank is big enough for two couples. And we’re sisters, I’m sure we can both find mates who can get along.” Your sister Hinara asked. 

“I guess we’ll see once you match up. But if not- it’s ok. Chances are she’ll be having babies born every day but only lay on her regular cycle. Which means she will constantly need to nurse and constantly be fed nursing food.” Ethel gently broke it to her before Hinara looked down at her own growing bosom since yours had started to bud early and you had the largest bosom of your family, well hell, you were the largest and plumpest of your sisters. Which is why if you had not previously volunteered, Ethel was going to try to bribe you with this tank into surrogates because your body already had the potential for it but since you volunteered, it was a great relief to her. 

“Yeah, I think between her and I, we’d be up for it.” Hinara nodded. 

“Thank you.” You thanked her as you swam over to her and hugged her tight as she hugged you back even tighter.  

“Ok, now you lay in the birthing chair.” You urged her before she reclined back and practically moaned in pleasure. 

“Oh yeah, best seat in the house, hey could we get two birthing seats in this nest?” Hinara asked before Ethel and Theo looked at each other meaningfully for a moment. 

“Yeah I think we can try to get that done in time.” Theo nodded. 

“Thank you.” You and Hinara thanked him before Theo picked the geode back up and out of the water and called “the stone guy” to make a second birthing seat in the geode. 

“We’re going to be co-parents!” You and Hinara squealed. 

“Which means when we pair up, we have to pair up with guys who can be friends.” You insisted. 

“Of course! The best of friends!” She insisted. 

“Ok, now out before you eat all the seagrapes.” Ethel insisted as some of your siblings were still at the seagrapes, wolfing them down. 

“Seapigs!” Hinara chastised her brothers as she smacked them over the head while their cheeks were still bulging with grapes as Ethel chose to get you all back into the bag then take you back home. 

“And? How’s the tank?” Your parents asked before the rest of your siblings all spoke over each other about how amazing it was. How it had coral of all kinds from all over the world. How it had it’s own thick kelp and seaweed forests and had it’s own seagrape plant growing in the tank itself and how pretty even the small shrimp were and the other snails and the pets and the prey items but how there had been no sea anemones or anything dangerous in it. How it was the biggest and most amazing tank ever in their opinion.  

“And Tali and Nara are going to share it! They picked out a dual nest that could have held at least five hundred, if not like closer to six hundred eggs! And Theo is gonna put a second birthing seat in the nest!” Your siblings told your parents. 

“Wow, you sure you girls aren’t biting off more than you can chew?” Your mother asked you and Hinara. 

“We’ll be together, we’re sisters, we got it. Besides, we’ve always gotten along the best and we’re each other’s best friends. And we may even pair up with a pair of brothers or cousins or something and especially if we can pair up with a later generation, that would be perfect. Because not only do they have a better education, but we would have a better tank and nest. It’s a challenge but I think we’re up for it.” Hinara insisted as her arm was around your shoulders as your arm was wrapped around her waist as both herself and you nodded confidently. 

“Well just be careful. And boys, guard your sisters, they’re going to be the most desired females in the tank over getting that tank. Now being a surrogate can have a mixed reaction. Some might think that’s awesome and some wouldn’t touch a surrogate with a ten fin long spear. Make sure they pair bond to mermen that are up for the challenge and who actually love your sisters and are not out just to get a good tank. In fact, keep the tank a secret. If the mermen would only want your sisters and be surrogates, let the tank be a surprise to them like it was for you.” Your father ordered your brothers and other siblings. 

“Yes Sir.” All your brothers nodded in agreement as your sisters nodded in agreement too. 

“Ethel? Can I be a surrogate too?” Your other siblings asked. 

“Sure, who wants to be in the program, line up so I can scan you and put you in the database as volunteers.” Ethel said as she had you and your siblings line up along the front of the glass and scanned your chips into her chip reader and made a special note in the system that all of you had volunteered to be in the surrogate program. 

“I am so proud of all of you. And even if any of you change your mind, the fact that you were even willing to try, speaks to how well your parents have raised you and also speaks to Lagu and Navere’s legacy too.” Ethel praised as her eyes watered at the bittersweet memory of them. 

“So to celebrate- Theo, I need a mackerel for this tank.” Ethel said as she gestured to the tank as Theo had just come back from setting the geode aside and calling the Mark- their special stone guy who carved the birthing beds into the geodes. 

“You got it Mom.” Theo grinned and came back only a few more moments with a huge mackerel, the largest one you had ever seen in your life! Along with special ‘nursing food bits’ for you and your sisters who also had volunteered for the program- to start eating. The purpose of the bits were to finish maturing your breasts and ready to nurse since the nursing bits had special hormones and pheremones added to them to induce milk production and were created just for surrogates to have a continuous milk supply. 

The nursing bits tasted peculiar but in a good way. If anything very tasty and unique as it was both sweet and savory before Ethel put in several large sea scallops, still in thier half shells but opened so that you and your siblings could eat those too. Now you recognized the sweetness in the nursing bits, it was from scallops. The scallop was an even more special treat for you since you only ever got to eat it once before. But for your parents- they had scallop a couple of times when your mother had recovered from extra large clutches and Navere and Lagu had helped nurse your parents back to health with the help of the natural sugars and sweetness of the scallops. 

That night you awoke to your breasts feeling weird as you looked down into your top to see milk clouding around both breasts. 

“Wow, ok.” You whispered as you took your top and fanned out the space to make the milk dissolve in the water. 

“You too?” Hinara murmured next to you. 

“You too?” You asked her. 

“Been leaking milk since the lights turned off.” Hinara muttered from her spot still laying down in the soft seagrass as a bed as the seagrass both acted like a mattress and a blanket for you and your siblings in this tank. 

“When it’s morning, I’ll help you girls make proper tops, until then, try to get some sleep.” Your mother muttered, not too far away as she laid next to your father in their own special spot on a seasponge bed next to the nest that they liked to sleep on, the blanket that they had spun and made together from both of their silks combained wrapped comfortably around them. 

“Sorry Mama.” You apologized for waking her up. 

“It’s ok. It’s always weird when your milk first comes in. You’ll get used to it.” She assured you. 

“Goodnight Mama.” You and Hinara both offered. 

“Goodnight girls. Love you.” Your mother cooed back before she drifted back into sleep. 

The next day your mother walked you and your other sisters who had volunteered to be surrogates and whose breasts had practically bloomed overnight into making proper seashell tops as Ethel had put a whole bag of really pretty small clam shells and strips of special leathery seaweed to make special tops that weren’t just a piece of seasilk that all of you had spun and made for yourselves. 

Meanwhile your father walked all your brothers through how to put eggs into the nest with the practice eggs on the other end of the tank. To leave your mother to teach you and your sisters to fashion for yourselves seashell tops as you found a pair of shells that were barely big enough to keep your breasts in. And they were the biggest shells in the bag. Your mother, yourself and your other sisters worked all day on making the seashell tops fit you and your sisters well.  All of you using your seasilk and leathery seaweed to serve as the backs, straps and to attach the two seashells to. 

Your sisters admired how much bigger their bosoms looked in the seashell tops versus the plain seasilk ones. And with the bag of seashells, Ethel included a bag of tiny little jewels and pearls that could be used to embellish the tops too. Which you and your sisters greatly enjoyed as even your own mother got to make herself a new seashell top with pearls and jewels in it. 

“Don’t tell your sisters but I was hoping that Ethel would choose you for her surrogate program. Our kind needs it, especially since Navere and Lagu are gone. Now, you need to understand that neither I or Ethel expects you and your future mate to be exactly like them. But the fact that you volunteered before you saw the tank or anything else, tells me you’re doing it for the right reasons. Your other brothers and sisters that have gone into the surrogate program are so happy and I hope whoever you pair bond to- knows that the real treasure is in here and not in here.” Your mother pointed to your heart before she gestured to your breasts which got you to snort a laugh. 

“Me too.” You admitted. 

“I’ll make sure Ethel has a puzzle box for you just in case. Cause some of those boys will only take one look at your body and that’ll be all they’ll need to see and especially if they can smell milk around you, that’ll just make them having nothing but mating with you on their brains. So it’ll be hard to find genuine interest in between all the lustful interests. But if you can find a mate who is actively fighting those instincts and is instead just trying to get to know you for you. That’ll be your best sign of a good match.” She advised. 

“Will we all need puzzle boxes?” Hinara asked worriedly. 

“Hopefully not. Hopefully your brothers can keep you safe. But there’s only 21 of them and 22 of you girls. So that means at least one of your brothers will be pulling double duty on you girls while also juggling trying to find mates themselves. So if all else fails, all you girls need to close ranks with each other, a group of 22 girls is better than only a pair of two or three. And if need be- deny any hint at a special tank. Only confirm that any of you or any of your sisters volunteered for the surrogate program.” She wisely advised. 

“Your sister Vivifer from my last clutch, she had a hard time finding a mate period. Because of the surrogate program. She had to be paired with a male from the university who initially didn’t want to be in the program period. But he was desperate enough for a mate that he took her sight unseen just to have a mate. And while they had a rocky start because the culture that Ethel likes to keep here and at her store is one way- it’s different everywhere else you go. And many mermen may not like the idea of fathering children that aren’t their own.” Your mother warned you. 

“Why?” You asked her. 

“Because in the wild, if a clutch is lost to parents, those parents become egg thieves to others of their kind on the reef. But if a nest is abandoned, it’s a mystery as to who or what might be in the eggs and are usually best to be another predator’s meal. So to our wild cousins, surrogates go against nature. As does inbreeding. But while Ethel thankfully is very against inbreeding, our kind needs the surrogates to survive and to have a future. Even if it goes against natural instinct. But you girls are pretty well educated even for being a middle clutch. It wouldn’t surprise me if the ten or less clutches view all of you as intellectual equals. And especially with tops like these, it will be assumed that either you’re later clutches, or most likely from a wealthy outside breeder. Who give their micros gifts like these to help beautify them for the process of courting and finding a mate. And Ethel rearely believes in such tactics. She wants your personalities to shine brighter than any jewel you would wear. So just make sure they know that you’re native- local girls and not non-native ones and that you got all this because your sisters volunteered for the program and all of you benefited from your sister’s “sacrifice”. Because a lot of micros look at surrogates as sacrificing a “normal” way of life. And you don’t even have to be specific on which sister it is either.” Your mother encouraged you and your sisters. 

“Yes Mama.” You and your sisters all echoed in response. 

“Oof, I need help.” You whimpered as you had trouble tying the damn shell bra to you because your breasts just wanted to be floating free as your mother and your sisters giggled softly as your mother helped you get into your top. 

“You’re gonna need another row of smaller shells or something along here.” Your mother said as she touched the inside lines of the bra where your breasts were smooshed together and you felt like you had one big boom across your whole chest. 

“Great.” You sarcastically said as you untied it and kept spinning more seasilk which was a special thread that a special gland that came from where your two fins of your tail came together. 

It used to be that seasilk was used to tie the nest together. But now that Ethel had nests out of geodes, her micros simply got to spin the silk for their clothing needs, mostly women to keep their breasts confined and not just floating any which way and get in the way of swimming. 

You used a special very thin tooth from one of your previous meals to serve as your needle as you quickly used it to weave a wider piece of it to cover your back. Especially since the little bit of string was enough for your smaller breasted sisters to keep their shell bras tied to them. But wasn’t enough for you- you needed serious reinforcement for your top as you made a very wide and long very strong section before you made yourselves straps that would go over your shoulders and sewed those into the whole width of the back of it so that it wouldn’t rip either at the top or the middle before you put another piece that would go under your breasts to serve as a “foundation” for the top itself then added the seashell cups and transferred the other little jewels and pearls before you made it front closing so you didn’t have to reach behind you to untie it or tie it. 

“There! See! You’re perfectly capable of doing anything you want to do.” Your mother praised as she inspected your handiwork. 

“Thank you.” You smiled happily as you felt much better and much more comfortable in this much firmer but more supportive top and what was more awesome was your bosom simply rested in the top and you didn’t feel like it was being smothered and smooshed either. 

“By my gills if I could get my breasts to even look half as big as yours, every merman in that courting tank would drool.” Your other sister Rava ventured since she was the smallest breasted of your sisters but she was also more petite than the others because she was the “runt” of the clutch. 

“They make my back hurt.” You complained. 

“So you need a merman with big hands to hold them for you.” Hinara teased which got you and your sisters to cackle. 

“We still have a few cycles before that’s even a possibility. Besides, smaller breasted females are sometimes much more favored than the bigger breasted ones.” Your mother reminded Rava. 

“But they also assume smaller chested girls are more docile and motherly too.” 

“You don’t want to be a mother?” Your own asked her. 

“No I do, I just don’t want to be docile.” Rava argued.  

“Well I’m sure there’s a merman that will be in that tank that will like you as wild as you want to be too.” Your mother reassured her confidently. 

“How can you know?” Rava asked. 

“Because you’re a middle generation clutch and everyone in that tank will be middle generation too. Count the number of tanks around us. Even if all of them had equal or even less sized clutches than you are from. Well, except for that line over there that are last generation micros- so they won’t be included but otherwise- do the math, how many merfolk will that be?” Your mother asked. 

“A lot.” Rava answered sheepishly. 

“No, actually do the math.” Your mother encouraged her. 

“There could be anywhere from 400-800 depending on which size of the middle batches are there.” You supplied before your mother sucked at her teeth and tapped you on the tail. 

“I told her to do the math, not you- who’s already done it obviously.” Your mother reminded you. 

“Between 500 and 600?” Your sister tried to find numbers in the middle as your mother just sighed tiredly. 

“Rava, for fin’s sake. Try to use your wild personality to get a later generation mate. Because if you try to use your intellect, you’ll get a second generation one if you can’t do simple math and multiplication.” Your mother chastised your sister who frowned deeply. 

“Ugh! Fine.” Rava groaned before she left and counted all the tanks she could see and then used her finger on the little bit of algae that was growing on the glass to do the math. 

“If all of them have clutches of 40- we will get at least 480 merpeople.” Rava answered eventually. 

“You didn’t account for our side of the wall having the same number of tanks, that’s just the opposite wall and the back wall.” You reminded her. 

“Ok fine, so, that’ll be what? Another 100 or so merpeople?” Rava complained. 

“And some of those you’ll be related to. Because you have to remember that your eldest siblings are parents now- and so you might be meeting your nieces and nephews that are now your age. So you have to be careful, when in doubt, use your nose. Your nose will tell you if they’re related to you or not.” Your mother also added. 

“Oh, yeah I forgot about that.” You remembered. 

“Yeah, so again, if you’re related to them, maybe they’ll remember that their own uncles and aunts are part of the surrogate program so they’ll be at least sympathetic and friendly.” Your mother reassured you. 

“Do you really think the boys will steer clear of us because of the surrogate program?” Hinara asked. 

“I worry about it. But then again, there may be other mermen who volunteered for the program who aren’t related to you so it might be very easy to pair up with them. So it’s one of those ‘wait and see’ kind of deals. But you need to prepare yourself for any and all outcomes.” Your mother specified. 

Meanwhile, Brivian and the other males from the back wall watched your tank with interest. 

“So we gotta assume that at least one of them is for the surrogate program?” Echi asked Brivian. 

“I am,” Brivian answered. 

“Well which ones did you see line up again?” Echi asked. 

“Only eight, but the one with the largest breasts, she was the first one to raise her hand and the first one in the net and the first one in the line. So I’m assuming she was the first to volunteer for it the way Ethel scanned them and fed them a whole mackerel and scallops.” Brivian said as he pointed to you in particular as he could still smell scallops in the water since the water got heated, filtered, oxygenated and pumped from one tank to all the others in the cubby, since the plumbing connected all the tanks together. 

“Well damn. She’s the hottest one but I don’t want to be a surrogate father, do you?” Echi asked Brivian. 

“Well I got it pretty good right where I am. I have this tank I’m inheriting and with you right next door. That’s a pretty nice given in a life that’s full of unknowns. And with the surrogates- they can get flown out to the other aquariums. I don’t know if I’d be up to that.” Brivian regretfully admitted. 

“Even as tempting and pretty and voluptuous as she is.” Echi sighed rather dreamily. 

“Well she’s awfully pretty too, maybe she’s vain too.” Brivian offered, trying to find reasons to not be interested.  

“A vain surrogate? Doubt it.” Echi argued. 

“Well, yeah, good point.” Brivian allowed as he bowed his head in defeat and twisted his lips before he looked up and tried to find any of your other sisters that didn’t line up that he found attractive but his eyes kept drifting and going to you no matter where else he tried to look. You were the most beautiful female he and every other in the last generation male line of tanks that were connected- had ever seen. You were perfect. You were plump and voluptuous and your smile was was as bright white as the lights were that illuminated the tanks and even though you were done making yourself a top, you still hung out and helped your sisters make thiers which only spoke of your generous personality and kindness. 

Surrogate. You were a surrogate. He had to keep that in mind. You were the unknown and neither he or anyone else had ever known a surrogate and while they understood the concept, it did feel...well...unnatural. And because they didn’t fully understand what and why anyone would even want to volunteer for such a life. It would figure that the most beautiful woman they had ever seen would be in the program. But now he just had the intense desire to talk to you and hear from your own lips why you would volunteer for such a life. 

“Well maybe she’ll be moved to the big tank on the end?” Echi prompted. 

“Doubt it. If a male volunteered, he would get the tank over her. Females can go wherever. It’s males who are picky about tanks and nests except for last generation females.” Brivian countered. 

“Well maybe I could charm her out of the program?” Echi hoped. 

“Doubt it. I mean look at her, she’s practically custom made for it.” Brivian gestured to you. 

“Yeah…all plump and perfect.” Echi sighed dreamily again as Brivian rolled his eyes. 

“All of them are plump.” Brivian pointed out. 

“Well, there’s that one, she seems to be the runt of the clutch. But she seems feisty. Which is pretty nice too.” Echi grinned schemingly. 

Brivian just shook his head before he simply turned his head from side to side, cracking his neck as he continued to swim in place there with his arms crossed over his chest as he contemplated it. 

Since he had been watching the scene unfold and think it over ever since Ethel announced the surrogate program as almost all of the last generations had decided against it. Since they viewed themselves as having too much to lose with their own tanks and nests and all. Some of the last generation females had already mostly decided on various last generation males because they could. 

But Brivian and Echi were a few of the males since males out numbered the last generation females three to one. But those that had already paired up had gone to each of the tanks and the couple chose each other’s tanks or nests. Most of the females chose the male’s tank but the males liked the female’s nests better than their own mother’s. But Brivian was related to almost all of the last generation females so for him- they were a no go since they were technically his cousins. Which was why him and Echi and the other males were still single. 

Which is what made looking at your tank. With so many beautiful women a favorite for him and the other males to watch especially since it was close to his own and he could see into your tank pretty easily. He was surprised and impressed that even among your siblings, there was such a variety of coloring. Some were more intensely orange, others more intensely blue, others intensely yellow or even more intensely turquoise. And even the pattern itself had a range. All within one clutch. Even a middle clutch of 43. And while he had other last generations to play with, there was nothing quite like having a true sibling and not just a friend or a cousin. 

Even though from a last generation micro’s point of view, he technically had it all. But looking at how happy your family was, maybe he didn’t. 

“So which one keeps catching your eye son?” Tani asked Brivian as he came to be beside him. 

“All of them.” Echi answered for his cousin which got murmurs of agreement from the others in the tank since Brivian’s tank had the best view of yours. 

“I’m sorry, are you my son?” Tani asked Echi as he gave Echi a curious look. 

“Well, like he said, all of them are eye catching.” Brivian answered honestly. 

“But the surrogate still has you hesitating?” Tani asked. 

“Wouldn’t you hesitate too?” Brivian asked his own father. 

“No.” Tani answered. 

“I think Mom would argue with you.” Brivian contested. 

“Briv. For once, things are different for you in ways I wish they could have been different for me. I got your mom’s attention because I had to play a fine line between smart and clever and dumb and humble. And she just happened to like my coloring better than the others that were around. For once, you don’t have to wade through women who would only want you for your tank and nest. You get to choose a woman who you actually like and who actually likes you too. And you have a very high chance of having natural chemistry and natural affection for her too and she, you. You could like her for her mind and heart and personality just as much if not more than anything about her form. I’m going to let you boys in on a little secret.” Tani began as Brivian, Echi and the others all turned their heads to consider him thoughtfully. 

“Son, your mother and I didn’t fully click until our third and fourth batches. But after we did. It didn’t matter that she was a last generation and I was a first generation. We were a mated, bonded pair at that point. And I would have moved into any tank, used any nest she wanted to use after that. Yeah this tank is pretty nice. But son, it’s just a tank.” He pointed out. 

“Look around you- there’s literally hundreds more just like it. Sure the coral is a little different in each one and the plants may be different or the decor or the layout and the nests are all slightly different. But they’re all essentially the same. All of them are the same exact size. All of them capable of having clutches ranging in size from 100 to 1.” He explained as he gestured to the other tanks in the cubby as Brivian and the other males looked out at the other tanks and realized he had a fair point.

“If you find a mate who you actually, genuinely like and can love both inside and out? The tank and nest won’t matter or amount to anything important or really that valuable or anything else around you. Only she’ll matter and providing her with everything you can will be your life’s goal and ambition.” he reasoned. 

“It takes a special kind of woman to even volunteer for the surrogate program. And while not every egg to hatch will be yours. While her body might be plump or not- it shows and proves how big her heart is. And if her heart is big enough to love babies that aren’t her own. She has more than enough love to love her mate just as much if not more. And if her heart is big enough to do that,  I don’t think the tank or the nest matters. But who she is as person will.” Briv’s dad implored his son and the other young mermen in the tank, all still content to watch you and your siblings from their spots. 

“Besides, if memory serves me right. It’s been her parents previous clutches that were in the program too. So for her- it may just be a family thing that they do. Besides, look around. It’s not like there’s a lot of us left. We need all the help we can get in the species. Don’t let the surrogate thing throw any of you off or deter you. Let each one of those girls prove what kind of women they are. And who knows? If any of them are as exceptional in personality as they look. Then being their mate as a surrogate father might be worth risking what you’ve grown up knowing- for the unknown. But for the right woman, will be worth everything you have or could possibly have. Because real, true love is always worth whatever you have to achieve it. Memillia is a good mother from what I’ve seen. It would make sense that her daughters would be good mothers too. And I would bet this tank on it.” Tani offered before he left Brivian, Echi and the others to think over his words of wisdom. 

“Do you really think you could love one of those girls?” Echi whispered Brivian. 

“Do you? The way you keep talking and sighing, makes it sound like you already are.” Brivian admitted. 

“Well maybe your old man is right. If the big one is as sweet in personality as she looks, I’ll go for it.” Echi insisted. 

“I thought you didn’t want to take on babies that weren’t yours?” Brivian countered skeptically.

“Well if there’s natural affection? And I could love her? And she could love me? Like really love me? I’d consider it. Especially since our whole lives we’ve been told and trained how to deal with first generations. At least with them- they’re smaller, later broods with more education than first gens.” Echi shrugged. 

“Oh my fins, she’s lactating already. Oooh, her body is ready.” Echi realized as he saw you and your other sisters move the shells in your tops as a milky white colored the water around you and your other seven sisters that had taken the nursing bits. 

Brivian had to fight his instincts that were starting to kick in to push him try to get to your tank from his own as the water that came from your tank got pulled and filtered into all the others as he could start to see males from all the other tanks suddenly press against the glass to try to find the lactating female because the pheramones in the milk itself betrayed your genetics along with your sisters and in that, Brivian’s own nose told him, neither you or any one in your clutch was related to him or any other of the last generation guys. And thus a viable, if not very desireable mate. He had to lean his head on the front side of his tank and close his eyes and take deep, cleansing breaths to regain control of his mind and body while Echi and the other males quickly left to go to their own tanks to quickly please themselves sexually because that milk was making them all horny as Brivian fought not to do the same. But he needed to not lose his head or his wits, especially when he was so close to finally getting a chance to pair up with a female that was intellectually his equal. But the taste in the water made his mouth water.  

Brivian could see that in some tanks, where your family must have been related to- those males were making a face of disgust while others were practically drooling and practically humping the water around them. Brivian realized- with that kind of reaction- you and your other lactating sisters would have a high chance at being swarmed and it’s you who would be in a puzzle box as he both consciously and subconsciously started to scour his tank, looking for the right shape of gravel to use as a wedge. 

“What are you looking for?” Areoliara asked her son as she had already packed up her things from this tank and was getting ready to leave the tank and join the retirement tank. 

“A wedge. Those surrogate girls are already lactating and it’s being pumped into the water system for all of us. And I can already tell those girls are gonna get swarmed and probably need to go into the puzzle boxes. The generation thing may not even matter this time. But their parents and grand parents probably don’t know about the puzzle boxes and how to lock or open them up. And with how the other males are already reacting to just the change in water- those girls are in danger.” Brivian answered as he dug through the gravel in the gravel pit in their tank which made his mother grin proudly. 

“Well good for you- trying to find a way to protect them even if you aren’t interested in them. Here.” She said as she pulled him back to the nest before she used a rock and broke a crystal formation. 

“One socket won’t make that big of a difference in here. But here, let me show you how to make a wedge.” She said as she took the pieces that broke out of the nest. And together they brought the varying shapes of gravel and stone to the sand pit and she taught him how to make a wedge out of crystal before Tani joined them and the three of them made wedges and sharp weapons too. Then the three of them combined their seasilk to make a bag to store the wedges and the weapons in that Brivian could wear the bag as a backpack underneath the QR code backpack.  

When it was moving out day, you and your siblings hugged both of your parents tightly and said your goodbyes before Theo and came and got you and your siblings first to be moved into the large courting tank first so that just in case you would get swarmed later- at least you could enjoy the tank as he let you and your siblings explore and enjoy the tank for a little while on your own. 

“So, just so you guys know, I already have five surrogate males from three different aquariums ready to take five surrogate females. But those females would have to travel but the tanks these males are staying in are just as nice as Tali’s tank. So do any of you want to meet them?” He asked you and your other siblings before you looked at your other sisters before they all nodded before Theo brought a monitor screen over to the front of the tank where five different males were as you and your sisters that were in the program all moved from screen to screen to meet the males. 

While their accent was slightly different, you could still understand them and especially your other sisters besides Hinara since you and Hinara already had your own tank already set and ready to go and while all the males loved your body. The fact that you already had a tank and wanted to co-parent with your sister Hinara. It obviously would be a clash so you and Hinara politely declined meeting them but your other sisters practically fell in love with the male on the other side of the screen and their tanks and were excited at the prospect of traveling. And once your other sisters decided on their mate, Theo scanned them and took them back out and got them ready to travel to their destinations as couriers were already there and ready to take them there ASAP. 

“Well it looks like it’s just Tess, Nara and you- Tali.” Theo said once he finished. 

“Yup.” You beamed happily before Nara and yourself sat on the soft coral, waiting for the other micros of your generation as your other remaining siblings sat on the other parts of the soft coral nearby. 

“Ok, you guys ready?” Theo asked as all of you nodded yes while you and Hinara held each other’s hands as you waited to see who would come next before Theo got the last generation micros. 

“Ok, now the only ones that are already in there are the clutch that had surrogate volunteers ok? And five of the eight volunteers have already been paired up with other male surrogate participants from the other aquariums. So that only leaves three left.” Theo told them. 

“What are their names?” Echi asked. 

“Oh the three remaining surrogate volunteers are Taliwai, Hinara and Tessis.” He answered. 

“Ok.” They nodded in understanding as Echi was especially excited to meet who was left and wondered if you were one of the ones that remained un paired and hoped you were. 

You and your siblings were grouped together and talking before you noticed two bags being brought to the tank, one bag, had 24 males and the other bag only had 8 females in it. 

“Wow, an all female late clutch.” Your brothers realized from looking at the bags. 

You were almost afraid to look at the bag of males as you just tried to focus on Hinara and gripped her hand tighter, the higher your anxiety rose. 

“It’s going to be ok.” Hinara reassured you before the water adjusted and the others were let out of their bags as all of you grouped together and met each other. 

“So you guys are the surrogate volunteers?” The girls asked. 

“They are.” Your brothers pointed as you, Hinara and Tessis all raised your hands and introduced yourselves to the others. 

“Aww, that’s awesome you guys are willing to sacrifice yourselves for the cause.” The last generation females patronized you and your sisters which you didn’t like very much. 

“Do you guys know where you guys are going?” Echi asked. 

“Nope, we won’t know till after we’ve paired up.” You spoke up first as you gave Hinara and Tessis a meaningful look as they nodded in agreement to that statement and kept a friendly smile on their faces.   

“Oh, well, in that case, hi, I’m Echi, it’s a pleasure to meet all of you, and Taliwai was it?” Echi asked as he made a beeline for you and offered you his hand to shake. 

“Yes, I’m Taliwai.” You answered as you shook his hand. 

“Weren’t you the first to volunteer?” Echi asked. 

“Yes I was.” You confirmed. 

“So will you get that big tank at the end of the cubby?” He asked hopefully and you immediately knew what he was after. He was interested in the tank, not you at all. 

“It’s a possibility but it’s not a certainty. But I got to pick out my nest already though. So that will go with me wherever I go and this is my sister Hinara who will be using it with me since it is a really big dual nest, with over 500 sockets and the nest will have two birthing beds in it so we will be co-parenting so we’re actually looking for a pair of males who either have brothers they’re really close with or cousins or at the very least very good friends.” You informed him emphasizing on every “negative” you could think of to discourage him from you further. 

“Oh.” Echi blinked in surprise as he looked from you to Hinara who smiled charmingly at him.

“Well, uh, the best of luck to you both. I’m sure Ethel and Theo and the others will really appreciate you being so generous with your time and your resources.” Echi offered politely as he slowly backed away. 

“So you’re not interested?” Hinara asked. 

“Nope, I, uh, I’m not interested in being a surrogate, let alone a co-parent with another set of couples. I mean both of you are lovely, but that’s way more than I could ever hope to handle. But I’m sure there will be others that will be interested and ready and willing.” Echi offered as he tried to be gracious about it before others were coming into the tanks and Echi was the first to leave to greet them. 

The other males from the the all male clutch started chatting up your remaining sisters and almost immediately started to pair up with them instead. Leaving Hinara and Tessis to greet the new males that just got introduced into the tank. Also while your brothers eagerly greeted the other new females that got introduced to the tank as the new girls were impressed with not just your brother’s manners, but their level of attention and thoughtfulness and ease too. A lot of them asked your brothers if they were either last generation or close to it, based on how well your brothers behaved as the real first generation merpersons were so grateful they weren’t be swarmed and could talk easily and pretend that they were middle generation micros, using the other last generation males they were put in with as their “clutch”. 

Except for Brivian, who was more interested now than he ever was- in getting to know you. Especially since Echi and the other last generation males withdrew their interest in you in particular. Which for Brivian, was actually a relief. 

“So why did you volunteer Taliwai?” Brivian asked you as he came and sat down next to you as he considered you curiously and was grateful that you were now actually left alone and could actually have a good conversation without being interrupted every other second with new suitors.  

“Because my parents were helped by Navere and Lagu when they laid their first clutch of almost a hundred eggs. My parents barely survived the birth and my father spent three days just putting mucus on all the eggs and there were so many eggs, they overflowed from the nest and my dad had to put the eggs on the outside of the nest and when my father was done, he collapsed onto the floor of the tank with my mother who was barely hanging on at all.” You recounted which made Brivian blink and raise his eyebrows high in surprise. 

“Wow.” Brivian murmured. 

“Navere and Lagu had to nurse them back to health while also helping them take care of their first clutch during the incubation process. My dad said that the mucus on the eggs on the outside of nest turned black from exposure to the light and he feared that all the babies inside would either come out either completely dark or completely white and albino because of the extreme in light. And the mucus was so thick that the babies had to be pulled and practically yanked out of thier eggs cause they would have suffocated having to go through such a thick layer of black mucus. And all four of them worried that the black color from the mucus was because a bacteria was growing in the mucus and the tank had to be completely closed off from the rest of the grid of tanks. Just in case it was a bacterial infection.”  You explained as Brivian was at a complete loss for words as that sounded like the worst case scenerio and the stuff of every worst nightmare ever as he had to cover his mouth with his hand to keep himself from gasping too loudly. 

“And once their large batch hatched- all four of them barely survived taking care of the whole batch. But that whole batch made it and survived and not just survived but thrived when that batch became first time parents in turn. All of them weren’t nearly as overwhelmed as other first generation parents usually tend to be. And because of Navere and Lagu’s help with not just that first batch, but with my parents especially. They gave my parents extra help and extra training during the incubation process as they helped nurse them back to health. They helped my parents be the best parents they could be, even as first time parents. And every clutch they have had since has been just as successful. And every clutch they have had since that first one, because of Lagu and Navere’s influence. Even when Lagu and Navere weren’t there for my parent’s proceeding clutches.  At least one or two have volunteered for the surrogate program because Lagu and Navere were just that influential and taught my parents a lot, if not more than they taught the clutch and helped them and kept them alive and able to bounce back from the brink of disaster.” You explained with the most adoring and proud smile as you recounted this to him. 

“And they helped my parents and my oldest generation siblings not just live and survive, but helped them to thrive, no matter the circumstances.” You explained as Brivian considered you thoughtfully as your face morphed from determined to downcast. 

“And when Lagu and Navere died trying to save a clutch that Ethel tried to save from fighting ring breeders. It hit my family especially hard. Because without Lagu and Navere, my parents and my previous generation siblings never would have survived and my parents would have never been able to give birth to me or my siblings now. And I want to honor them and their memory. So when Ethel told us she was starting an official surrogate program for our species, I jumped at the chance. I don’t care where I go or what tank I’m in. Or if I get to co-parent with other couples or my sister or simply help other clutches hatch. I want to help any way I can. And the fighting rings have already destroyed so many other micros, regardless of species. Any way that I can help fight back and help Ethel and others like her fight for us in a world so much bigger than the small tanks we grow up in. And maybe get a chance to help our wild cousins who have a chance to live free in the wild. I’ll take that chance. Granted, I personally don’t want to live in the wild. Cause I’d probably be eaten alive in the first two seconds from being released. But if I get a chance to learn how to help raise future offspring and prepare them- for the chance that either they or their children or their children’s children have a chance at being introduced into the- reintroduction of to the wild- pool. That pool needs the most help of all. And anything I can do to give them a higher and better chance at not just surviving in the wild, but actually thrive too? I’ll do it.” You insisted as Brive was very impressed and just plain astounded. His father was right. You were beautiful inside and out and that was more than enough to convince him of the positives of the program and had him silencing any doubts he had either about it or you. He was bound and determined to help the cause and knew that if the others cared enough to just listen to this, they would feel differently too. But as he looked out at the others, he was frustrated that the others were outright shunning you and Tess and Nara.  

“Well, in that case, I have something for you and your siblings.” Brivian said as he took off both the QR tag and the pack he had spun himself and put the bag in his lap and put the QR code back onto his back. 

“My family could see your tank from ours and when we noticed that your tank got given nursing bits, and when that water got pumped into the other tanks, my family and I noticed a very distinct reaction among the other tanks. So I’m Brivian by the way.” Brivian said as he paused in opening the bag on his lap and offered his hand to you to shake.

“Taliwai, Tali for short.” You answered as you shook his hand firmly. Grateful that he at least heard you out instead of instantly making a judgement agaisnt you. 

“Pleasure to meet you Tali. Anyway, um, I’m lucky because my mother was a last generation micro. And when she and the rest of my family noticed the reaction to water being pumped from your tank among all the others, my whole family worked on making you and your siblings these.” Brivian explained as he handed you a wedge and a small dagger with the handle had a seasilk spun over it so it wouldn’t hurt your hand to hold it. 

“Just in case any of you get swarmed and they have to put you into the puzzle boxes. You can put the wedges into the puzzles to lock them to keep any over eager potential mate- who would have um, a very physical reaction to you- from getting into the compartment with you. Especially when they could do so without your consent and could potentially hurt you.” He said as he handed them to you even though he was ready to fight off any male that dared to try to force mating on you if you didn’t want it. You took them and looked them over appreciatively before you called your siblings back to you so that they could also receive a wedge and a small dagger for protection and introduced Brivian to all of them and told them why Brivian gave these gifts to you. Which your siblings gratefully and graciously accepted. 

“Thanks Brivian.” You thanked him as did your other siblings, all of you hugging him gratefully as now that Brivian was hugging you he was fighting his own instincts to start mating with you because the scent of the milk leaking out of your top was practically sending him into a tizzy. 

“You’re welcome. I didn’t know what generation your parents were so I didn’t know if you would know about the puzzle boxes or how to solve them or not, cause they’re all a little different. Well, according to my mother. So hopefully everyone else can behave but just in case, at least you guys can defend yourselves and help keep each other safe.” Brivian offered to you and to your siblings who thanked him but gratefully could swim away and continue to try to court their potential mates, except for Hinara and Tessis who had yet to find a mate because the surrogate program was a turn off to every male they met so far. 

“So what do you think of the surrogate program?” You asked him.

“Honestly? Before I heard about it from you. I thought was just a lot of unknowns and... intimidating. Like, really intimidating for me. I’m a later generation so my family is pretty small.” Brivian said as he gestured between himself and the other males that he had come into the tank with. 

“And I guess the possibility of the unknown since no one in my immediate family have ever had any encounters with surrogates. While we understood the concept, we had no clue what it would be like to actually live like that and that gave us some hesitation about the project. But I know there are surrogates for others and especially in the fresh water tanks, surrogates are very common.” Brivian answered in all honesty and a bit sheepishly. 

“So you’re hesitant.” You realized. 

“Well, I don’t want to be but, yeah, I guess I am. But, you’re doing it for the right reasons. You volunteered without hesitation. Cause I saw when Ethel came by your tank, you were the first to raise your hand and swim forward. And that takes guts and courage and heart. And I have nothing but the highest respect for you and your other siblings for even volunteering. Especially when there’s so many challenges and what ifs and unknowns in being surrogates in general. You’re all braver than me or anyone else I’ve ever known or met. And I can understand why and how you would be at least and sympathetic and even empathetic and partial to the program. And the species will benefit for it. And while others are too scared to let go of the known to embrace the unknown. They are also to scared to see the great rewards there could be for taking such risks and they’re very short sighted and cowards for not at least hearing you out and dismissing you and the other volunteers.” He praised which brought an appreciative smile to your face.  

“Tell you what Tali, since you were the first to volunteer for the program- you should get first pick of any merman in here and your other sisters should also get first picks too. Because what you’ve chosen to do is a very noble cause. And it gives you and your lives so much more meaning than any other. I know we just met a few minutes ago. But, I would at least like to be in the running to be your mate. Because you make an unknown sound like an adventure. And the rewards obviously far outweigh any risk involved. But I also want to make sure that you get paired up with someone who you like and who also really likes you too. And I do, I’m not saying I don’t like you, because I do, I adore you. And your choices are the best choices you could make with your future. But I don’t want to pressure you into accepting me just over our one conversation.” Brivian offered which in turn surprised you, because here you thought he would be saying the same things that Echi did and would have found a way to excuse himself but if anything he seemed to dig his fins in, which you admired.  

“So before you decide on me, I want you to meet all the others first and really get to know them and if there’s one that you click with or that there’s instant chemistry or if there’s another male who also really wants to be a surrogate father with you, then that will be your choice. But I want to make sure that you and all of your siblings that volunteered for the program get paired up first before I do, now my brothers can do what they want, but that’s what I’m gonna do.” Brivian offered. 

“Thank you Brivian.” You thanked him. 

“You can just call me Briv.” He offered. 

“Ok.” You nodded as you reached out and intertwined your fingers with his and just held his hand, the wedge and dagger still on your lap as your hands intertwined wonderfully as you were so happy and reassured that you made the right decision. Although Brive wasn’t a bad specimen himself by any means and the fact that he was being so nice and trying so hard to be intellectual with you even though you could tell by the fact that his cloaca was trying to bulge, he at least physically liked you. 

“So, co parenting with another couple doesn’t deter you?” You asked him. 

“Well you’re the expert on that, I’ll look to you to guide me.” Brivian offered. 

“Yeah, Briv, I don’t think I need to see any other merman. The fact that you’re willing to try, even with so many unknowns yourself. And even cared enough that you and your family made my siblings and I all these tools and ways to defend ourselves. Not knowing if we had that knowledge or not. Tells me that you have good intentions too. I’d happily be your mate if you’d be mine.” You offered as you scooted closer to him and set your chin onto his immaculately muscled shoulder. 

“You drive a hard bargain Tali.” Briv teased and smiled before he kissed you sweetly. 

“Then I have a secret for you.” You whispered before he inclined his ear closer to your mouth as he moved your joined hands to his own lap to help pull you closer. 

“I am getting that huge tank at the end of the cubby because I was the first to volunteer. It’s amazing, you’re gonna love it.” You whispered in his ear. 

“I have a secret too.” He whispered back before you inclined your ear to him. 

“What?” You asked giddily. 

“I’m a last generation micro, it was just me, my mother and father that made these. But to hide the real last generation micros, Theo put us into two groups to make us look like later generations. But I don’t care about your tank or mine. Wherever you go or wherever we’re needed, that’s where we can go.” Brivian whispered back into your ear as you gasped and giggled. 

“I knew it, you smartfin.” You pinched his side which made him laugh and squirm but wrap his arm around you anyway but Tess and Nara were having the hardest time trying to find a mate as they came back and sat on the other side of you. 

“And?” You asked as your other siblings circled back to you. 

“Every other male so far doesn’t want anything to do with us because of the surrogate thing.” Tess grumped as they sat together and pouted. 

“And none of them really don’t want anything to do with co-parenting.” Nara admitted. 

“Well the co-parenting thing was only contingent on if we found mates that could get along. And if the co-parent thing is too much of a deterrent on top of the surrogate thing. Then don’t worry about it. It was a long shot anyway. But it seems with every new bag, the generations keep getting younger and younger and with younger and bigger clutches. They might be a little more eager to pair up just to get to pair up, maybe they won’t care about the surrogate thing so much that the later generations have.” You tried to encourage them. 

“I have an idea.” Brivian suddenly suggested. 

“What?” You and your sisters asked. 

“Get your brothers, and let’s find a cave, to put you girls into. We’ll have you and their mates get into the cave for “protection” and with myself and the other males guarding you and armed, it will make you appear much more valuable and prized, because appearances can mean a lot to others in this tank. Then take the milk that’s in your top and fan it into the water and that should be enough of a physical inducement to kick their own bodies into ‘need to pair up mode’ to get even the later generation micros and with you two being the last two available females, we can create a puzzle box of our own.” Brivian supplied which got you to gasp in delight and grab his face and kiss him soundly. 

“Thank you.” You thanked him before you took your sisters and found the appropriate spot as Brivian then got your brothers and told them about the difficulty Tess and Nara were having and his idea to get them paired up like they were before your brothers and your other sisters and their mates all came and all the girls giddily squeezed into the cave as your brothers and your sister’s mates all “guarded” the entrance. 

Then Nara, Tess and yourself took your tops off and squeezed your breasts to push the milk out in the water before Nara and Tess used their own glands from around their cloaca to fan the pheramones into the water that was now cloudy with the milk before you and the others used your fins to fan it out of the entrance as Briv had to brace himself to keep his own instincts from taking over as the others that were already paired had to do the same. But the effect was instantaneous and exactly what your sisters needed. Because all of a sudden, Brivian, your brothers and your sister’s mates all had to fight off the swarm of males that followed their nose to the cave. 

“Who is in there?!” All the males whose hormones and instincts were driving them almost wild demanded as they tried to look past the males into the cave where you put Nara and Tess at the mouth so they were easily seen. 

“The last two remaining surrogate volunteers are in there. They have been fed nursing bits already. We’re protecting them from being swarmed, obviously.” Brivian announced loudly as the other males did all they could to steal glimpses of Tess and Nara as all the boys suddenly, being overwhelmed by their instincts suddenly changed their tune because of the pheramones and the milk in the water making Tess and Nara now- irresistible to all the single males. 

Now instead of Tess and Nara being ignored, suddenly they were being clammored for as the competition for them became fierce. The male micros suddenly grew much more competitive as new males that were being released into the tank also pushed forward to see what the source of the scent of pure sex was in the water that was coming from. 

The previous males who had snubbed Nara and Tess were rebuked by them. Before the now rejected males were pushed farther away- to make room for much more willing and eager males who were now meeting Tess and Nara for the first time and ready and willing to do anything to secure one of the last two surrogate females and who were actually excited about them too. Because not only were they beautiful and plump and practically perfect in body but actually really sweet too and while the surrogate thing was a surprise, these males were much more willing to try and were humble enough to be willing to be taught by their mates about it. 

Once Nara and Tess had chosen a mate, their brothers and their sister’s mates could leave the area to leave Nara and Tess to court their chosen mate as once they left you grabbed the anchor of a piece of soft coral and grabbed Brivian and pulled him into the little cave and put the soft piece of coral at the entrance to block it off. 

“Thank you, thank you, thank you!” You thanked him as you practically pounced on him and kissed him all over his face as he laughed but kissed you back as you could feel a very prominent bulge where his own cloaca was because not only was his own cock hard enough to drill through hard coral with, but his gonads were close to bursting with sperm ready to be let loose. 

“You’re welcome?” Brivian offered as now the he was actively kissing you, he was trying so hard to not let his own cock spring free of his cloaca and spear into yours because that could incite a mating ball. 

“Thank you for being so kind and so humble and yet willing to help both me and my sisters and even my brothers. Our children could not ask for a better father and I could not have asked for a better mate.” You thanked him earnestly. 

“I’m going to try, but Tali if you keep this up, I don’t know if I could hold myself or anyone else back, we could spark a uh, a…” Brivian tried to reason with you before your cloaca aligned with his and the mucus from the glands of her own caused a reaction of his cock springing free and instantly spearing into your own sex as the mucus suddenly got sticky, creating a suction and a tube that connected his genitals to yours which got you both moan and groan in delight.  

“A what now?” You purred seductively as lust and desire was making you feel sexually insatiable for him.

“Fuck it.” Brivian grunted before he used his body to pin you down and began mating with you and getting you out of that stiff shelled top that kind of scraped against his chest and was delighted when with just a quick pull of a string on the knot, the top opened to reveal your amazing bosom to him as you slipped it off easily and hung it on a piece of nearby coral to put on when you were done. 

He could both smell and taste the milk before his mouth attached to your breast and sucked down as much milk as your breast would give which earned some gasps and moans from you as you held his head in place before he sucked all he could from one before turning his attention to the other as he greedily and hungrily sucked it down. While his cock had found your canal that led to your egg pouch and the more his cock pumped into it, the bigger it got as you could feel the eggs that were already mature and ready to be fertilized thanks to the nursing bits pushing your body to fully mature.

It felt torturously slow yet all too fast before Brivian’s movements brought you your sexual release beofre Brivian chased his own right after. He filled your eggsack full of sperm as his body stiffened while his hold on you tightened so that he kept a firm grip on you. His own body surprised him since his body had been making almost ridiculous amounts of sperm ever since he got into this tank with you. As if his body had already decided it was going to mate with yours no matter what and prepared an extra large load of sperm just for you and your oh so precious eggs. His cock just kept throbbing as his own gonads just kept pumping rope after rope of sperm into you as his orgasm and yours seemed to last a small eternity. 

 Your own egg sack shuddered and quiverred, moving his sperm to move around all the eggs that lined the many folds of the pouch before he went limp but still put all of his body over yours possessively as he fought to catch his breath as he slowly came out of the lust filled haze his brain had plunged into. 

“That. A mating ball.” Brivian managed to say as he pointed out of the small space between the soft coral blocking the entrance to the cave to just outside of it as it was an all out orgy outside the cave. 

“Yeah, somehow I doubt any of them care that they’re out there and we’re in here.” You giggled. 

“Besides, you’d protect me if any of them were to try to come in here and join us.” You ventured. 

“You’re right, I would, without hesitation.” Brivian readily agreed before kissing you reassuringly. Which only started another round of mating between you as the rest of the eggs in your egg pouch got fertilized by that second round as you felt like your egg pouch suddenly doubled in size trying to keep all of his sperm inside. 

It only took a few hours for Theo and Ethel to come back to see if any of the couples had paired up and the moment the lid was opened, Brivian moved the soft corral and drug you towards the net and tried to get you into the net first and was making sure that only you and him would get in the net. 

“Well then.” Ethel giggled as she happily got you and Brivian out first and got you to your tank. 

“So? What do you think?” You asked him as you laid down in the bottom of the bag, your egg sack already distending your belly as the eggs were fertilized and continued to mature as your body was already starting to form a special sack of fluid around each fertilized yolk. 

“It’s nice, not as nice as you but... I guess it’ll do. A tank is just a tank. But any tank you’re in, is my tank too.” Brivian shrugged with a lopsided grin as he held your head in his lap as he combed your hair with his fingers and let you use his body to give you comfort which got you to laugh. 

“I love you.” You sighed as you looked up into his gorgeous brown eyes as you reached up to cup his face with your hand and smiled dreamily when he leaned into your touch. 

“I love you too Tali.” He assured you as he bent over and kissed you sweetly and was more interested in making sure you rested and were comfortable than he was about the tank. Which only filled you with relief that your mate really did love you as much as he had claimed, and was telling you the truth when he had said that the tank didn’t matter. Only that you were in it, would it be his. 

Once the water had acclimated you were released as a very nice mackerel with two sardines and a huge scallop were placed in the tank for you and Brivian to gorge yourselves on along with a special pill that was full of special calcium and other supplements for good eggshell production.  

Brivian made sure you ate until you were both literally and figuratively stuffed before he would really eat himself. And once you were both done with the food, the other little “pets” came to eat the left overs. Which were in the tank to basically be living garbage disposals. But were very friendly and tame and kinda cute too. 

Then he helped you to lay on the softest of the seasponges so that you could take a nap in warm light that acted like warm sunshine and in the most supreme comfort as you and him both cuddled together and got to sleep without worrying about anyone else intruding on you or your privacy as the hardshell top you had been wearing before was now long gone, still hanging on a piece of coral, so that there was nothing between his body and yours. 

You woke up a few hours later and got to show him around the whole tank so he could be just as familiar and comfortable here as you were before you showed him what was essentially “ the bedroom” that was built into the reef in the aquarium that actually had a big and very comfortable bed. 

“It’s missing something.” Brivian noted as he sat on the mattress with you. 

“What could it be missing?” You asked. 

“This bed needs a blanket.” He pointed out. 

“Well then we have some work to do then don’t we?” You asked him since it was a tradition that a couple would spin a blanket to wrap themselves and each other in. Just in case the water temperature dropped as you and him sat side by side and spun a beautiful and very soft blanket for your extra large and extra soft bed then even spun special cushions to serve as your pillow on the bed too. 

The two of you got done just in time for the lights to dim to off. Signaling it was now time to sleep as he made sure you were behind him in the bed. So that his body was between you and the rest of the tank. He used the same trick of moving the hard anchors of the smaller soft corals to make sure that the “door” to the bedroom was shut to conceal you both. And yet he still kept himself between the door and you and the inner walls of the cave before he held you and the two of you fell into a blissful sleep. 

The first of every night from now until the end of your days, together, happy and content.

[maknaesdancersrappers]

Devoted 2

part 9

Overall warning/s: kinkier smut (eg. voyeurism, exhibition, etc.) character death, dark themes

Just how devoted is Jaehyun to you?

prev: part 8

wc: 8.2k

You could hear voices outside. You peek out of one eye, blinded by the light after being shut for so long and automatically forced them open when you realized it was the sunlight coming from the window that blinded you. You whipped your head towards the little alarm clock on your nightstand, blinking at the red numbers that read 10:54 AM. 

Shit.

You sat up, cussing at yourself when your head began to spin. Pausing for a moment, you realized you didn’t have anything planned today aside from getting groceries for tonight’s get together. Still, you scold yourself, you shouldn’t be oversleeping; not after last night’s events. 

Then you heard voices outside your room again. It sounded like Jaehyun, but why was he still home? The other voice took you a moment to register, but eventually recognized it as Yuta’s. Why were they here at this hour? You swung your legs over the bed and trudged to the bathroom to freshen up. When you were done, you threw on some decent clothing and peeked out of the door.

You froze when you met eyes with a complete stranger, heart dropping to the floor as you assumed the worse. He doesn’t seem to notice your distress at his presence, respectfully bowing his head and quietly greeting you a good morning. It throws you off for a moment until Jaehyun appears behind him and smiles at you.

“Good morning, baby. Did you sleep well?”

“I,” You looked down the hall and spotted a couple more men, dressed in the same shirt as the first one, talking to Yuta, “Yeah… aren’t you supposed to be at work?”

“Not today. I’m having the security cameras installed. Get your phone, by the way, so you can download their app.”

You got your phone and followed him out into the living room, where Yuta smiles at you.

“Good morning! I hope we didn’t wake you up.” He gestures to his employees.

“Not at all! If anything, I should be thanking you for doing so since I overslept.”

He motions for you to come closer, pointing to a dark gray box by the television, “Here, the QR code for the app is on the camera’s router. It saves every footage from each camera and only you two have access to it; or a third party of your choice in case of emergencies, which I recommend you doing. Jaehyun is already designated as the admin, unless you have any qualms on that.”

You playfully hum, jutting your bottom lip out and crossing your arms, “I do, actually.”

Jaehyun chuckles, “You can be the admin to it, dear.” 

“I’m kidding, does it really matter which one of us is the admin?” You opened up your phone’s camera and placed it over the QR code. It sends you to a website, titled Nakamoto Technologies, that has a small text greeting Jaehyun, and a unique download button for the app. You tapped on the button and waited for it to download.

“Sir,” One of Yuta’s employees came forward, “We’re done with installing the cameras.”

“Ah, good. Please set it up as well.” He nods, turning to you and Jaehyun, “Come watch so you’ll know what to do in case there’s a system error or reboot.”

You gather at the kitchen table where the man opens up their company laptop and begins to go through the steps one by one.

As his employee demonstrates, your phone vibrates to notify you that the download has finished and you launch the app. You’re taken to a feed of the hallway outside your apartment, where one of the employees is checking the camera and gives a thumbs up.

“Door cam is live.” The man in front of you announced.

You swiped right and the feed changed; you saw yourself along with the others and you looked over to where the camera was at. It was a small dark dome in the corner of the ceiling, barely noticeable at first glance and could even pass off as a light fixture.

“Living room cam is live. So is the hallway camera and kitchen camera. Waiting for the balcony and bedroom camera feeds.”

A part of you still didn’t feel safe as you watched the other camera feeds connect. If the person does get in, the only thing these cameras can do is alert Jaehyun and be a witness to the possible crime done onto you. The thought sends a shiver down your spine. You’re still praying to every higher being that this is all some prank and whoever Kun was trying to tell you about is just a thing of the past.

You feel a hand come over your shoulders and Jaehyun squeezes you lightly, “Are you okay?”

“Yeah.” You dismissed, “Just need some coffee. Would any of you like anything?”

After they assured you they were fine, you ambled over to the kitchen to make yourself a cup of coffee. You glanced at the kitchen camera; it didn’t look noticeable either. Choosing the hazelino muffin flavor and popping the bronzy pod into the Nespresso machine, you leaned against the counter and waited for it to brew. Did Jaehyun take a day off today just to have the cameras installed? Or is he coming into work when they’re finished?

Today, Ten was coming in from Thailand to visit and everyone was adamant to get together. Fortunately, you and Jaehyun already volunteered to host the gathering. You had to go to the grocery to pick up some ingredients for the food you had planned on serving. Would Jaehyun accompany you? You glanced over your shoulder just as your coffee was ready and saw Jaehyun and Yuta talking seriously. 

Her personal camera.

That’s what you could read from your fiance’s lips. Personal camera? For what?

Images from that time in his office and the lewd video saved on his computer flashed in your head, bringing a wave of heat over your cheeks.

Oh.

You picked up your coffee mug and softly blew at it, wondering if Jaehyun had ever watched that video back.

A cell phone rang behind you and Jaehyun’s voice took over the abrupt halt of the ringtone.

“What? She hasn’t been home for 3 days?”

The concern in his voice makes you spin around. Who was he talking about?

“How about our cameras? Nothing?” He puts a hand over his forehead and uses his thumb and ring finger to rub circles on his temples, “Okay. Yeah, no, she—she’s fine. They’re done installing here. I’ll let her know. You take care, too, hyung.”

That must have been Yunho, then. You let out a little gasp; were they talking about Mina? Dread and worry began to bubble in your stomach. Could the person who sent the note be the reason why Mina is missing? Was she kidnapped? You put your mug down and paced towards Jaehyun, “Was that about Mina?”

He frowns, “Y-yeah, it was. Yunho said her family requested for a welfare check after she didn’t contact them like she usually does when she gets home. The police have been contacted already.”

“I hope she’s okay.” You bit down on your lip, “Nothing seemed strange when she left for work the day she was last seen?”

“No, she went home with one of the secretaries, Sera. But Sera says they separated at the train station because Mina said she was going to meet someone and that was the last of their interaction. Mina never mentioned who she was meeting or where exactly she was going.”

“Then police should search up any surveillance cameras around the area to determine where she went off to.” Yuta interjected, “There’s bound to be establishments that have their own CCTVs that caught her.”

You put a hand on Jaehyun’s arm, “Please update me about her situation, okay?”

“Okay.” He pulled you forward and kissed your forehead, “I’m sure she’s fine. Let’s not think the worst has befallen her.”

“Even so, she looks like someone who would put up a good fight before going down.” Yuta curtly chuckles before he clears his throat. “Looks like the setup is done and everything is working fine. If they’re are any problems, I’m a call away.”

“Thank you, Yuta. Are you sure you don’t want me to pay for this?”

“Let’s call it an engagement gift.” He grins brightly, “And if you want the same setup for your house, we’ll call that a housewarming gift.”

Yuta and his workers left shortly afterwards, leaving you to return to your coffee and Jaehyun insisting he’ll cook lunch for the two of you.

“What time does Ten arrive?” He asks, washing his hands at the sink.

“Two, I think. He’ll have a few hours to rest up a bit at his hotel.” You take a lengthy gulp of your coffee, softly moaning at the warmth coating your throat. “Oh, I have to go to the grocery!”

Jaehyun hums, “Okay, let’s go around three?”

You smile to yourself; of course he wouldn’t let you go alone. You definitely did not mind. It’s been a while since the two of you went grocery shopping together. “Sounds good. I’m sure they’ll be here at 9 so there’s plenty of time to cook and dilly dally.”

“Dilly dally?” He repeats, clearly amused as he spares you a glance before fetching ingredients in the refrigerator. “What exactly do you mean by dilly dally?”

“Whatever you want it to mean as, baby.” You shot back with a wink, “But it feels so tense lately, a bubble bath sounds good right now.”

“You deserve one, baby.”

You pout, “I think you deserve one, too. Even a massage.”

Jaehyun shakes his head, unable to contain his smile. “Should I call for a masseuse later?”

“Like I’d let any other woman touch you for too long.” You huffed, jutting your bottom lip out at the thought.

“I’d still like a massage though. If I do the dishes, can I get a happy ending?”

“Of cou— have you ever received a happy ending massage?!”

He bursts out laughing, “No, I haven’t. Don’t worry. Are those even still a thing? Like there are still salons that offer that?”

“I don’t know and we never will because we can handle it ourselves, okay?”

“Baby, calm down, do you honestly think I’d avail that from anyone else aside from you? Besides, I only found out about those when I was in high school.”

Your ears perked up at this, “High school?”

“Yeah, I told you how my friends back then were basically scum, right? Every week, especially after training, they’d get massages. I went once and the girl offered the happy ending service — which I didn’t really understand until she tried reaching for my dick and I declined it.” He practically shuddered at the memory, pausing from chopping onions. “I never went with them again.”

This was the first time he openly talked about something from when he was in high school. It’s not a happy memory, but he’s still opening up.

“Do you really hate them? Your friends from high school, I mean.”

Jaehyun doesn’t respond at first and you patiently wait for him to set aside the vegetables he’s cut before he looks at you. “I still had fun with them, I guess. If it weren’t for the vices, I would have liked to stay friends with most of them.”

You’re finished with your coffee, bringing it over to the sink to wash and put it away on the rack. Afterwards, you walked over to Jaehyun and kissed his cheek as a silent thank you for opening up.

He glances at you with an unsure smile, knowing you kissed him for something but wasn’t sure on the cause, so you took the chance to kiss his lips.

“I’ll set the table.” You quietly murmured after he pulled away.

Instead of the actual dining table, you only laid out the kitchenware on the breakfast counter. Jaehyun finished cooking just as you got two bowls full of rice and sat yourself down on the barstool. He brings over the food after plating and plays a song on his phone after quickly hooking up the bluetooth speakers from the living room.

You both start eating, appreciatively moaning at the burst of flavor dancing on your tongue. What you’d do to have Jaehyun cook for the two of you permanently if he wasn’t so busy with work. 

“Oh, right. My mom called this morning. She found two possible wedding venues for us already.” Jaehyun informs you after swallowing. “One is a high end resort and the other is a private property; a friend of hers. I think it’s Yebin’s aunt.”

“Doesn’t the resort sound better? We can reserve rooms for the guests.”

“If we choose the resort, we’ll be reserving the whole place.”

You almost choked on your food, “We barely have 50 guests, Jaehyun. I don’t think we have to reserve the entire place. There are people who could have been waiting to book that place for a vacation.”

He purses his lips, “Then let’s go with my mom’s friend. It’s a villa they own for their family’s vacation homes and they have cherry blossom trees that fit the color scheme you want. We could have the entire place for ourselves. We wouldn’t need that much security either.”

Pushing the rice around your bowl with your chopsticks, you silently reminded yourself how prominent of a family Jaehyun belonged to. It would make headlines, of course, and there’s bound to be press trying to sneak a few shots of the wedding. Privacy is top priority among the Jungs.

“Okay. But can we do an ocular?” 

“Oh, uhm…” Jaehyun trails off, “I might have an overseas trip this weekend. Is it okay if only you and mom go? Her friend is only available this week, too, before she heads back to Europe.”

You’re a little disappointed, but you’re not going to tell him you want him there because you’re certain he’ll do everything in his power to cancel the trip for a petty request. You nod your head, “I don’t mind! In fact, maybe I’ll ask my mom to tag along and we can have a nice girl’s weekend.”

“That sounds great.” He grins, “Ask Minkyung and Yebin as well, maybe they’re free.”

“If we want cherry blossoms to bloom on our wedding day, that would give us six months from today.” It’s the middle of September and Spring starts in April. “Isn’t that too quick? Doesn’t wedding planning take at least a year?”

He reaches over the table and puts his hands over yours, “Would you rather have me preserve cherry blossom trees for our wedding?”

You feel your eyes almost bugging out at the suggestion, “That… sounds expensive… preserve a tree?”

“No, love, a couple of trees. We can’t just have one, maybe six? And you know I wouldn’t mind spending millions for our wedding.”

“Well I mind!” You groaned, “But honestly, a spring wedding is the most ideal for me, if not a winter one.”

Jaehyun chuckles, “I don’t mind having a wedding for each season, baby. If you’re worried about the cost and the possible annoyance of our friends and families at having four weddings, then we could always just dress up for the occasion and do it ourselves.”

This makes you laugh while shaking your head in disbelief, “Just say our vows, kiss, and dance for a night?”

“Who knows, maybe for the winter ‘wedding’, we’ll be three.”

It didn’t click in your head at first what he had meant at first because as cheesy as it sounds, the way he looked at you with soft, gleaming eyes had you distracted for a moment, but his thumb moves across your knuckles and you have visions of his hand running over your swollen belly.

“That soon?” You lightheartedly teased, moving your hand so your fingers intertwined.

“I said ‘maybe.’” He squeezes your hand, “We’ll have a baby whenever you’re ready.”

“Well then,” You retract your hand away from his when you see both your plates are empty, “I can promise you that you don’t have to wait a year.”

You stand up and start to reach for his plates but he lightly swats your hands away.

“Nuh uh, not today. I’ll do the dishes.”

“But you already cooked for us.”

“And I’ll clean up for us, too.” He drags your plate away from you and stands up as well. “For a price, of course.”

The coy smile on his face makes you narrow your gaze at him. Putting a hand on your hip, you cocked a brow, “And that price is?”

He winks at you, “It involves your mouth.”

“That’s it?” You scoffed, sashaying over to his side of the table, “Easy.”

The smug look on his face is instantly wiped away when you grab his crotch and he winces in shock.

“I—I meant later—” 

“Oh, I know. Just warming it up.”

Jaehyun tries to move away, but ends up bucking his hips into your touch when you flex your hands. The pained expression on his face makes you giggle, seeing the conflict of trying to be sane enough to do his chores or just giving into your temptation. 

You pull away and cross your arms, “I’ll go run us a bath now.”

“God damn it.” He grumbles, but sucks in a breath and forces out a smile, “Okay. I’ll be there in a minute.”

“Take your time.”

“No the fuck I won’t.”

You burst out laughing, spying the annoyance in his features as he walks past you after gathering the plates in his hands. You make your way down the hall, glancing at the newly installed camera without much thought, and head inside the bathroom. As you run the bath, you peruse through your small collection of bath bombs and pick out a pink and grayish-purple one with a rose design. Giving it a quick whiff, you sigh at the scent of jasmine and ylang-ylang invading your senses. Any other day, Jaehyun would have probably preferred the green tea and peppermint one (although you’re convinced he’s only amused that it’s shaped like a dinosaur) but you’re certain he’s going to love this one just as much.

You gently lower it into the warm water, the instant fizzing of the bath bomb as it disintegrates in your hand tickles you. You let it float on its own to turn the tap off and decide to get it before Jaehyun comes. However, as you were halfway through tugging off your shirt above your head, a pair of hands slithered over your bare waist from behind to your chest. You toss your shirt to the side and strained your neck to look at Jaehyun, who merely smiles.

“Oh, don’t mind me, I’m just warming it up.”

“Enough warming up, the water will get cold.” You pushed against him using your butt as you peeled down your shorts and underwear. 

He steps back and you think it’s so he could take off his clothes, but then you feel his hands on your ass, spreading your cheeks apart so he could access your pussy with his tongue. You fall forward, grabbing onto the edge of the tub with a loud gasp.

“Jae—”

He moans and the vibrations affect you as well. You weren’t very keen on this position, not when his nose is just poking at your anus, but he obviously doesn’t mind. 

“Jaehyun,” You whimpered when his tongue reached your clit, “The water.”

He relents, standing up after delivering a soft smack on your pussy, but doesn’t let go of your body. “I know, I know.”

You straighten yourself up, only to flinch when he snakes his hand between your legs. “If you keep doing that, I’ll feel bad about wasting this bath I ran.”

He chuckles, kissing your shoulder, “Which one is this one?”

“It’s jasmine-scented.” You push his hand away and spin around, grabbing hold onto the edge of his shirt. “It’s called Sex Bomb.”

His eyebrows shoot up ever so slightly, “Is that so? Well, let’s get my clothes off and hop in.”

“If you could have just kept your hands to yourself for just a second, we could have breezed through that step ages ago.” You pulled his shirt up and he shrugs it off completely, tossing it to where you discarded your shirt. You then push his sweats down and he kicks it off to the side.

Getting into the tub first, you wait for him to make himself comfortable before sitting between his legs and leaning back on his chest. The water’s temperature was just right, not too hot for the two of you to be bothered or too cold for either of you to get sick.

“Can we please make joined bath times a weekly thing?” You sighed, hugging onto one of his arms that slung around you.

“Baby, you read my mind.” Jaehyun kisses the back of your head. “Now, about that payment for earlier.”

You rolled your shoulders back, exaggerating your movements, “Ooh, my body still feels a bit stiff though.”

Jaehyun scoffs behind you, bringing his hands over your chest, “That’s it?” Mocking your tone from earlier, “Easy.”

“A new house!” Ten exclaims, pounding his fist on the table, shaking the cocktails in their glasses. “Tell me when and where so I can clear my schedule for the housewarming!”

“Knowing Jung, it’s not just a house.” Yebin makes a remark as she narrows her eyes at you for confirmation, to which you move your head around in a nonchalant manner, and she scoffs, “Of course.”

“Heard the Kangs bought new land down south.” Jaehyun snides, laid back on his chair with his arm draped on the back of yours. “Is it another private property or are you commercializing it?”

She snorts, rolling her eyes, “Of course we’re commercializing it. A resort we’ll have the honor of staying at before it even opens.”

Doyoung makes a face at her, “So, we’re the guinea pigs?”

Everyone laughs when Yebin unabashedly shrugs her shoulders and crinkles her nose.

“Oh!” You exclaimed, perking up in your seat. “Speaking of private property, Yebin, Minkyung, are you guys free this weekend? I’ll be doing an ocular for the wedding venue and it would be a great girl’s weekend—”

Minkyung gasps with visible excitement in her eyes, “Bachelorette party?!”

“Do you want strippers—ow!” Yebin yelps, jerking up and hitting her knee on the table. She glares at Jaehyun, “What are you, 12?”

“Our mothers are coming along.” He grits through his teeth before taking a sip of his whiskey. “I suggested having the two of you tag along since I’ll be out of the country this weekend.”

“Well then, I’m in! We can plan the actual bachelorette party there.” Minkyung gleefully chirps, smiling at you.

“No—ow!” It was Jaehyun’s turn to cry, hitting the underside of the table so hard that the forks clattered.

“Johnny, plan this man a bachelor’s party!” Yebin elbows the man beside her, who’s brows shoot up as he glances at Jaehyun.

“Okay. Leave it to me.”

Jaehyun grimaces and you laugh at his expression, knowing he can’t stop Johnny now if he says those four words.

“Enough about us!” You wave your hand around, feeling warm from your fourth glass of wine. “How about you guys? Dons? Are you still hooking up with that divorce attorney?”

Doyoung almost spat out his whiskey, quickly grabbing a napkin to dab his lips. Everyone begins to jeer as he coughs loudly, “Uhm, yeah, every other week. Just to destress, you know?”

“Nice.” Yebin raises her wine glass at him, but he just makes a face at her. “Oh my god, imagine if you accidentally knock that chick up. You’d have a kid before these two.”

“Not a chance. She’s both on pills and film.” Doyoung vehemently shuts the idea down, shaking his head in denial. “I’m not fit to be a dad either.”

“Aw, Dons,” You coo, “You don’t know that. Didn’t you have a name planned for a son back in high school?”

He sucks his teeth, looking up as he tries to remember, eyes growing wide along with a smile, “Oh, right! I think I said Jeno or something. I don’t know; that was for that project on genetics.”

“Oh my god,” Minkyung props her elbow up on the table and rests her chin on her palm, “Could you guys imagine all our kids being friends? That would be so cute. Please! We need to make them best friends, too!”

“Honey, that’s only happening if we all manage to get pregnant or impregnate someone in a specific timeline.” Yebin points out, taking another swig of her drink.

Minkyung pouts for a brief moment, using her free hand to meticulously tap her manicured nails rhythmically on the table before slapping the surface and leaning towards you. “When are you two having kids?”

You almost regurgitate your drink back into the glass, surprised that she was really contemplating the idea.

“[Y/N] promised we don’t have to wait a year after the wedding.” Jaehyun casually answers, swirling his whiskey around, “So maybe by the end of the next year?”

“Okay, I can do that.” Minkyung tells herself.

Yebin stares at her, “Min, you’re not actually thinking about having a baby just to make sure they’ll be besties with theirs. Think about your job.”

Minkyung worked as a model that was highly sought after by high end fashion brands and this barely gave her time to socialize since she flew to Europe and America for fashion weeks and photoshoots, let alone date someone.

“So I’ll be on hiatus for a few years, so what?” She waves her hand, “If these two are having kids, I am going to give them the best present: a best friend.”

“You don’t have a boyfriend.” Ten points out, “Gosh, do you even get laid?”

“You don’t know two shits, Ten.” Minkyung retorts in a sweet voice and an innocent smile. “Anyways, there’s something I am very curious about and I’m tipsy enough to ask it without regrets: what happened between you and Johnny?”

The table went silent for a moment before the two men in question burst out laughing.

“John, didn’t you tell them?”

“I was hoping I didn’t have to... with what’s going on and all but…” Johnny scratches his nape, letting out a heavy sigh, “Our relationship was just for shits and giggles. We established that from the get go especially since my parents arranged a marriage for me between a business partner.”

“I thought you got out of that?” Jaehyun asks, moving the hand behind to your shoulder and giving you a lazy massage. “The Bae conglomerate, right?”

Johnny nods his head, releasing another drawn out sigh before taking a sip, “Yeah, the one that hates men.”

“Irene?” Yebin’s eyes looked like they were about to pop out of her head, “Her parents are arranging her marriage… with you?!”

“I’m sorry, is there something wrong with marrying me?” He says in faux offense, putting a hand over his chest and jutting his bottom lip out at her. “But, yeah, Irene. You know her?”

Jaehyun mumbles something into his glass about not being surprised about that, although those across the table — including Yebin — hears him, prompting Yebin to give him a pointed glare.

“Yeah, we were classmates. Kyeonggi Girls’.”

You licked your lips; “Kyeonggi…?”

“The elite all girls’ academy.” She flips her hair and bats her eyelashes at you, “Everyone was fake.”

“Why does that school sound familiar?”

“Because I went to Kyeonggi Boys’? Their brother school? Did you forget?” Jaehyun pinched your waist and you jerked towards him, backhanding his stomach for doing so. “But I agree, our school is a breeding ground for fakes.”

“I bet your schools had mandatory boy-girl interactions.” Johnny chuckled, “Did you two meet back then?”

“No. Thank god.” They said in unison, making everyone burst out into laughter while they share annoyed looks at one another.

“But, [Y/N],” Jaehyun clears his throat to cut the noise, “You mentioned before that we could have met back then.”

You frowned, not recalling what he was saying, “I did?”

“That interschool sports festival? You told me you won first place in swimming and my team won in basketball.”

“Oh!” You remembered now; during one of your first dates while you talked about competitive swimming, you mentioned winning an interschool competition and that was the time Jaehyun told you where he studied in high school after recognizing the said festival. You cupped his face, “I watched all the basketball games, though, I can’t believe I missed your face.”

“That’s because his visuals are just so-so back in high school. Kyeonggi Boys’ are assholes, but they’re hot. Jung must have blended right in, especially if he’s on varsity basketball.” 

“I don’t know if I should be offended you clustered me with them as being assholes or flattered you called us hot.”

“Don’t let it get to your ego, Jung, your fiancee is right there. Besides,” Yebin leaned back, “Almost every girl in Kyeonggi’s wanted your dick. They loved the ice prince vibes; they didn’t even care that someone spread rumors that you were gay… I suppose it’s better that you two didn’t get together in high school because I’m sure my bitch ass classmates would tear your reputation apart.”

Jaehyun makes an indignant sound in retort, “I would have protected her if that had happened.”

Yebin makes a snide comment and sparks another little bicker between her and Jaehyun with Minkyung trying to calm both (mostly Yebin) down. You glance around the table, eyes a little heavy already; Ten and Johnny are talking to themselves about business, while Doyoung was on his phone. Sneaking a peek, you let out a scandalized gasp when you caught sight of the text he had just received.

“You? Sexting?” You put a hand over your mouth to further prove your shock at what you had witnessed. “Dons, just date the woman!”

His face goes bright red, eyes avoiding every gaze turned to him as everyone starts to tease him. “It’s nothing serious! I’m still not attracted to her, I just like the sex!”

“It always starts out that way.” Ten nudged him with his shoulder, “Just let yourself fall when it happens.”

“Anyways!” He exclaims, ready to change the topic, “Jaehyun’s bachelor party, yeah?”

“I don’t want one.” Jaehyun shakes his head, but the three other men have launched themselves into planning it.

“Invite Sicheng!” You butt into their conversation, “Oh, and Yuta, too!”

“Yuta?” Johnny repeats, “Nakamoto? Sure, why not. He’s a cool guy.”

“Ah, of Nakamoto Technologies?”

You knew Johnny knew Yuta, but you didn’t expect Doyoung to know him as well. “You know him, Dons?”

He shrugs, “Not really, but remember that emergency regarding a hack in our system? It was resolved, but the CEO wants to change suppliers. Nakamoto Tech was suggested to us and they seem efficient and trustworthy.”

“They handle our security systems, too. Both at work and here.” Jaehyun mentions, putting his hand back over your shoulder.

“He was here this morning.”

“But you’re moving, why do you need to install a security system here?” Doyoung asks, turning his gaze to where you gestured: the barely noticeable CCTV camera dome in the kitchen ceiling corner.

You open your mouth, ready to answer, but you hesitate, turning to Jaehyun instead, who seemed reluctant to give a reason as well. “Well,”

“Oh my god! Is it your stalker from college? He found you again, didn’t he?” Minkyung lets out a concerned gasp, putting her wine glass down.

You were ready to deny her allegations, but Jaehyun’s voice overpowers yours as he responds, “I’m afraid so. We’re tightening security up to catch him and put him in his place. That’s why I’m a little reluctant to go away for that business trip.”

You stayed quiet, confused as to why Jaehyun would say it was your college stalker, but then again it would be harder to explain why the two of you know that it’s not the guy from college. His hand finds yours under the table and he squeezes tightly with you returning the motion.

“Then hire a damn bodyguard for her!” Yebin yells, “You know you can’t be with her every waking hour and you can’t just lock her up, too!”

“I know that.” Jaehyun grits, “I’m already on top of it. I just haven’t run the idea by [Y/N] yet but I’ve already chosen two bodyguards for her.”

“Isn’t that too much?” You chewed on your bottom lip, glancing between Yebin and Jaehyun. “Do I really need two?”

“Yes.” They, along with Johnny, said. Jaehyun quickly follows up with, “It’s so that they can take turns. Think of it like morning and night shifts. If it were up to me, I would recommend two at a time.”

You shake your head, “I don’t need four bodyguards. But okay, if you think I really need them, then I’d like to meet the two you’ve chosen.”

“There’s a whole company worth of them if you don’t like the two I’ve picked out for you.”

“Oh, are these from Moon Security Services?” Johnny inquires, “Then you’ll be in good hands. Taeil has the best bodyguards and security personnel in the business. Don’t let his looks represent his employees, they’re all army trained.”

As you listened to their conversation, you picked a muscat grape from the platter in front of you and popped it into your mouth. Jaehyun, Johnny, Yebin, and Ten all come from rich families; it would be no surprise that they know who and what the best of best are. Minkyung, despite sharing the same last name as Yebin, isn’t from the Kang Conglomerate, and she proclaims herself as the pauper of the group, yet she studied all her school life under a scholarship and now earns at least 5-digits in dollars as a model. You and Doyoung come from well-off families and work well-paying jobs as well, although yours depended on your clients which made you the one in the group that earned the least. It wasn’t something that bothered you, but moments like these reminded you of it. Without Jaehyun, you wouldn’t be sipping on Schiava or munching on expensive grapes every week. Without him, you wouldn’t be living comfortably in a penthouse and soon, in a mansion that could house four families.  You’d like to think you would still do well even if you weren’t with Jaehyun, but the thought of not being with him isn’t something you let your mind dwell on.

You feel a kiss on your temple; you closed your eyes and let yourself smile. When Jaehyun pulls away, you peer up at him and he asks, “Are you okay?”

“Just drowning in my thoughts. Thanks for pulling me out.”

“Is it the stalker?” Minkyung asks, “Karma will bite his ass eventually, [Y/N].”

“I just… What would he want from me anyways? Why me?”

Jaehyun kisses your hair, “If it’s you he wants, then honestly, I don’t blame him.”

“And if it’s not that guy from college,” Yebin crosses her arms over the table, “Let’s say this guy is actually after you, Jung, and they’re going to use [Y/N] against you.”

“If that’s the case,” He grabs a grape and twiddles it between his fingers. “then I’ll deal with it accordingly.”

You silently watch in shock as Jaehyun slowly digs his thumbnail into the little fruit’s flesh, drawing out the sweet juice.

“If someone has a problem with me, then take it out on me. I’m not going to forgive anyone who lays a hand on [Y/N].” He cuts the grape all the way through, popping one half into his mouth. “It’s petty to drag people who aren’t involved into situations they’re not a part of or don’t even belong to.”

It was five in the morning when you woke up with a horrible headache. Last night — well, a couple hours ago — you made the horrible decision to drink 3 bottles of wine with the girls and switch to whiskey when neither of you could stand up to grab a new bottle of Schiava in the fridge. You begrudgingly rolled off the bed, noting Jaehyun wasn’t beside you. You’re not even sure if he got into bed… you don’t even know how you got to bed.

Your mouth was dry like sandpaper, just begging for some water so you trudged your way out to the kitchen. You peered into the guest room, spying Minkyung and Yebin on each of the twin beds, recalling how they claimed each one and banished the boys on the couch. Walking out of the hallway, you silently laugh at Johnny draped across one of the armchairs while Ten and Doyoung comfortably laid themselves on the L-shaped couch, all of them snoring in disharmony. The kitchen cub lights were on and you vaguely heard the sound of running water. Reaching your destination, you find Jaehyun putting away the last whiskey glass into the dishwasher before shutting it and wiping his hands on a towel. On the kitchen island, there were two glasses filled with water and two painkillers.

“Oh, you’re up.” Jaehyun turns around and looks surprised to see you.

“You did the dishes?”

“Well, I only meant to grab us some water and painkillers, but I thought I’d do them anyway.” He gestures to the glasses you’ve already spotted. He cheekily grins at you, a little lopsided that told you he was still drunk, “Don’t worry, I’m not going to ask for compensation.”

You giggled, almost like a schoolgirl, when his dimples appeared. You drink one of the glasses, gulping down half of it before letting out a satisfied sigh when your thirst is finally quenched. “Are we getting too old to get drunk like this?”

“Absolutely not.” Jaehyun tears one of the painkillers and tosses it into his mouth, “We’re in our mid-20’s, what are you talking about?”

“I don’t know, maybe I’m still drunk.” You swallowed down the other pill and chased it with water, “If that thing Minkyung wants — if we all had children and they become best friends — we gotta let them drink when they want, alright? Not like, at 14 when they’re curious, but at like, barely legal age. That’s fine, right? As long as they’re at someone’s house — no clubs and whatnots. We’re gonna be cool parents.”

“Okay, [Y/N].” He pulled you into a hug and kissed your cheek, “Let them drink at a barely legal age; got it.”

“It’s better they learn from us than some strangers. Give them enough freedom so they wouldn’t become rebellious or estranged. Promise me you’ll take our children out on daddy dates.”

“I promise to take our children out to daddy dates.” He repeats, “So mommy can have a spa day to herself.”

“We’re going to spoil them just enough so they wouldn’t turn into entitled brats.” You mumbled into his chest, “Promise me you’re not going to force them into inheriting the family business, especially if they want to become something else.”

“I promise, baby.” He kisses your cheek again, “Little [Y/N] can be anything she wants to be.”

“Hey,” You tilt your head back to see his face, “What if we have a son first?”

“Then what would you name him?”

You moved your hands to cup his cheeks, “Well, I don’t want him to be Jaehyun Jr. or Jaehyun the second… but I still want to name him after you. So maybe something with Jae?”

“Jaebeom? Jaeho? Jaegyu?” He pauses, “Uh… Jaemin?”

“I don’t know. Maybe I’ll decide on it when I’m actually pregnant.”

Jaehyun ducks his head down and presses his lips against yours, “Okay.”

He leans forward again for another kiss, but you lightly push him away.

“Don’t be offended,” You swallowed, “But I want to throw up.”

“What? Then go to the bathroom!” He scolds in a playful manner before quickly escorting you to the toilet and holding your hair up for you.

“I should hire you once I save enough to move.” Minkyung states, moving her sunglasses up as a makeshift headband to inspect the little succulents on display, “You would know how I’d like my home. Something along the lines of light gray, green accents, and—”

“—a splash of pink.” You finished for her, throwing her a smirk over your shoulder as you checked the price of the snake plant.

“See! You know me so well.” Her face drops, “Unless I’m that readable.”

“No, it’s because I lived with you for 4 years.” You laughed, moving over to compare the plants side by side, “Also, you didn’t have to come with me.”

You and Minkyung met up for brunch earlier that day. It was Friday, a week after everyone met up, the day Jaehyun leaves for Hong Kong, and the day before you were scheduled to go check out the possible wedding venues with her, Yebin, and your moms. When you mentioned you had to run an errand for work, she invited herself with you.

“Don’t be ridiculous! Not after what you and Jaehyun told us last week, as if I’d let you be alone in public places. I’ll be with you as long as I can.”

“I have bodyguards, Min.” You peer out the large window to see two men outside, dressed in casual clothes, but had ear pieces and shades on. You met the pair first thing on Monday morning and learned they were cousins. Hyunwoo was older than you by five years while Jooheon was older by two years. They were big and intimidating upon first impression, but they spoke softly and humbly towards you whenever you talked to them. They initially wore suits as their uniform, but after they accompanied you to visit Kyungwon at your old office and accumulated pointed stares, you asked for them to wear casual clothes instead and wait outside or in the car. They drove you around, opened doors for you, and either one would always survey the area before you even arrived. It felt a little too excessive, but in the end all of this was for your safety and Jaehyun’s peace of mind.

Minkyung follows your gaze and pouts, “Well, they’re outside as per your request, but who knows what could happen in here with you.”

“Hyunwoo already checked the place out before we arrived, otherwise Jooheon wouldn’t have let us step foot in here.” You returned your attention to the task at hand; choosing some indoor plants for Yuta’s apartment. Personally, you wanted the peace lilies, but the yellow streaks of the snake plant complemented Yuta’s apartment as a whole. You also had to choose the perfect pot to go with it. “I think it’s too tacky to go with a yellow pot, even if it’s muted. Which is better, black or white?”

“See? You would be standing here all day if I didn’t come with you.” Minkyung rolls her eyes, “I like the white one!”

“If I were to design your new apartment, I’d fill it with plants and call it a day.” You joked, calling for one of the sales attendants.

“And you know what? I wouldn’t be mad about it.” She picked up a small succulent in a lightbulb shaped glass container, “You should try gardening in your new house, [Y/N]! It could be your pregnancy hobby.”

“My what?”

“Like, the hobby you pick up because you’re pregnant. Some people try knitting, some paint, you can try gardening!”

You don’t get to answer back as the sales attendant you flagged down finally came to you and you pointed out which plants you wanted to buy. After it’s settled you and Minkyung follow her to the counter where you fill up some forms to have it delivered to Yuta’s apartment when it’s ready. When you finish, you look back at Minkyung who still had the succulent in her hands, “Are you going to buy that?”

“Yes!” She grins, “I’ve already named it as well!”

“You… name your plants?”

“This is Cadbury.”

“...after chocolates?”

She sighs, “If it dies, then I’ll never eat that brand ever again.”

You stare at her for a good minute, trying to figure out if she was joking or not as she steps forward to the cashier and asks for the succulent to be wrapped. “Have you lost one yet?”

While she fishes out her card from her purse, she offers you a sad pout, “Nutella.”

“Miss [L/N] [Y/N]?” You turn your head to a polite voice over the counter and return the smile, “Hello ma’am! We received an order for flowers to be picked up by you today.”

“Aw!” Minkyung coos, “Jaehyun got you flowers?”

“I…” You paused, releasing a sigh instead and looked back at the sales attendant, “Okay, then, thank you.”

The lady excuses herself to retrieve the flowers at the back of the store and Minkyung leans her head on yours.

“Oh, [Y/N], I wish I’d find someone as sweet as Jaehyun. Did he know you were going here today?”

“Yeah, I texted him before we went here. It’s just weird though, he’ll usually pick it up himself and surprise me back home.”

“Maybe he’s too busy? His flight is tonight, right?” Just then, her eyes practically sparkled as an idea popped in her head, “Let me and Yebs sleepover! I’ll come once he’s gone and it’ll be more efficient for us the next day since we’re leaving before lunch.”

“Sure, I’ll ask Yebin right now.” You take out your phone just as the lady returns with a small, brown clay pot with reddish flowers. It wasn’t what you were expecting; he usually gave you roses or peonies, occasionally sunflowers, in bouquets, but never potted plants. Nonetheless, it’s still from Jaehyun and you readily accept it from the lady. “Oh, thank you. What are these?”

“Begonias, ma’am. If I may, it’s quite peculiar your partner would give you these flowers.”

“Why is that?”

“Well, ma’am, they symbolize caution.”

“Caution?” You and Minkyung said in unison.

The lady waves her hands, “But don’t take it too literally, ma’am. Since they are from your partner, it could mean gratitude and giving thanks.”

Jaehyun is romantic, but you don’t think he’s sensible enough to search up flowers and their symbolisms before giving them to you. With the current situation of him leaving, it could mean he just wants you to be careful and be alert while he’s gone.

After checking out the plants for Yuta’s apartment and Minkyung’s little succulent, you tucked the flower pot in your arms and made your way outside where Jooheon opened the door for the two of you. You dropped Minkyung off at her apartment and Hyunwoo drove you back to yours, where you set the flowers on the living room table and proceeded to pack your weekend bag and Jaehyun’s weekend luggage.

Jaehyun came home earlier than usual as he had a flight at 9PM and you greeted him at the hallway opening with a kiss.

“Minkyung and Yebin are coming over after you leave. They’ll sleepover as well so we don’t have to wait for each other tomorrow morning when we have to leave.” You informed him, watching him loosen his tie. “Are you hungry? I was about to make dinner.”

“I’m starving.” He sheepishly admits, prompting you to glare at him since it meant he had skipped lunch once more. “Work is piling up, baby.”

“That’s not an excuse.” You reprimanded, tiptoeing to kiss him once more, “But I understand. I’ll go get dinner ready. Go freshen up for your flight.”

“Yes, ma’am.” He chases after your lips for a longer kiss before pulling away.

As you moved around him to get to the kitchen, you quickly spun on your heels to face him again, “Oh, and thank you for the flowers. The lady said it was an odd choice.”

You gesture to the begonias on the coffee table and Jaehyun stops untying his tie.

“Oh.” He says after a pregnant pause, “Are they?”

“Yeah and I get it, you want me to be careful. Don’t worry, I will be.”

“Is that what they meant?” He stares at the flowers and moves his attention back to you as you nodded, “They must have mixed up my order then… I’ll replace them.”

“No, you don’t have to. They’re pretty, don’t you think? You don’t have to replace them, besides, the lady said they could also mean gratitude.”

He licks his lips in contemplation, “Alright then.”

You smile at him, giving him another kiss, “I love you.”

“I love you, too.” Jaehyun whispers back, watching you disappear into the kitchen.

He moves towards the coffee table, scrutinizing the potted red flowers under an intense glare. He wants to cancel his flight and stay with you; but this meeting had the whole Jung’s reputation on the line. There’s a horrible sick feeling in his gut and he could practically feel the familiar rush of anger in his veins. He would never give you flowers with such meanings — no, that’s not the problem — he never even ordered flowers for you today to begin with.

a/n: yay new update 🎉 i’m aiming to update with part 10 in a week or two, meaning the old schedule of uploading on Fridays will be back (hopefully) 🤞🏻 please let me know what you think of this chapter here 🥰

next: part 10

~ buy me a peach?  but why?

[fallinnflower]

dark honey

joshua x reader (musician!joshua, barista!reader, nuisances-to-lovers?)

dark honey - a variety of honey that is darker in color and has a sweeter, more intense flavor

lyrics from here

a/n: this is a passion project i’ve been working on off and on for months now, an i have to give a huge thanks to @softseunies​ for helping me see it through. enjoy this long, super indulgent fluff for everyone’s favorite gentleman~

Your first job in university is at a coffee shop down in the adjacent town. It’s on the main street, and at any given time you’re catering to town locals and students alike. Although at first you’d been uncertain about the job, you’d quickly come to enjoy it — your coworkers brought you out of your shell, and the longer you worked the more confident in your abilities you became.

It was after the winter break that the musician first showed up. He looks about your age, with dirty blond curls of hair brushing just over his eyebrows; you wonder if he goes to your university, and if so what he’s doing playing a gig on a Thursday night. You try not to think too much of it, focusing on your job — that is, until the boy takes a break from tuning his guitar, coming to lean up against the counter right in front of you. His pose is calculatedly casual, the kind of relaxed that you think must come with practice and lots of looking at himself in the mirror. How could anyone look so effortlessly attractive otherwise?

“Hi,” you greet, just like you would anyone else. “What can I get for you?” He smiles at you. It makes him look a bit cat-like. There’s a glimmer in his eyes that’s charming, and to you it screams danger.

“An iced americano, please,” he says, and even his speaking voice seems to have a musical quality to it, soft and lilting. This guy seems like he could do some serious damage to your heart, you think, if you’d ever let him. You flash him your most customer service branded smile, 

“Alright. I’ll bring it over to you when you’re ready.” You catch him reaching for his wallet and remember the staff meeting that had been called just this afternoon, quickly speaking up to catch his attention,

“First drink is on the house.” The boy stops, hand still in his back pocket, and looks up at you with a mischievous glimmer in his eyes. You can practically see the gears turning in his mind as the grin grows on his face, gaze sparkling.

“Boss’s orders,” you add, then turn away to the espresso machine. You can feel the musician’s eyes on you as you go about the process of making his drink, and while the espresso pours over the ice you busy yourself with wiping down the counters and restocking the cups and lids. The whole while, you can tell he’s stayed by the counter, waiting for you to finish his drink — you hate that it makes you feel so on edge, considering the coffeeshop is in such a relaxed evening state.

“Here you go,” you say, forcing a polite smile as you pass him his drink. He takes it into his hands and you thank all the stars above that this weird situation is finally going to be over, turning your attention to the bakery case—

You hear the straw punch through the whole in his plastic lid, the ice clinking together, and rather than footsteps away from the counter you hear his voice once again.

“Are you sticking around for the performance?” He asks, taking a casual sip of his drink. You take care to look only into his eyes (not at his pretty lips, he’s really unfairly good-looking and it makes you resent him, almost).

“You mean your performance?” You ask, coolly. He shoots you a cocky smirk, and you look away to pull an almost-empty tray of cookies off their shelf to be restocked in the back.

“I’ll still be working then, so yes. Technically.” 

“Good,” he replies, grinning. Your only response is a curt nod as you begin making your way into the kitchen, but as you shoulder the door open he speaks up once again, 

“I’m Joshua, by the way.” You bite down on the inside of your cheek, hesitating for a moment before replying.

“Y/N.”

With that, you enter the kitchen and nudge the door shut behind you, desperate to get away from the feeling of Joshua’s eyes on your back and the blush you can feel raging across your cheeks.

Yeah, you think, this guy is definitely dangerous. (For your heart.)

As soon as you come back out into the shop, you catch Joshua glancing up at you. Every time he catches your eye, he flashes you that cat-like grin, and you politely smile back because you don’t want your boss to scold you later for being rude.

“He’s cute,” Yeri whispers after about the third shared glance, elbowing you gently. Out of the corner of your eyes you can see Joshua scrolling through something on his phone, his guitar still perched in his lap. For a moment, you almost allow yourself to admire him, from the way his collarbones peek through the unbuttoned top of his shirt to the narrowness of his waist, and the way the light of the setting sun pouring through the windows catches in his hair, turning it to spun gold. When he’s not looking at you and obviously flirting, he has an almost angelic prettiness to him that’s hard to look away from.

“I guess,” you reply, going back to wiping down the counters.

“Well, he seems to think you’re cute, anyways.” You roll your eyes.

“He seems like the type to think everyone is cute, Yeri.”

“I don’t know,” she says. “He seems nice enough to me.” When you glance up, you find him looking at you again. This time, he winks, and you once again smile politely before turning back to Yeri and her teasing grin.

“Too flirtatious for my tastes,” you reply coolly. “I’m sure he’ll be hitting on you next.” 

Business picks up slightly around the time of Joshua’s gig, so you don’t pay him too much attention. He has a sweet voice though, you have to admit — not that you thought your boss would hire someone untalented for this new business venture, but you find yourself feeling quite prickly about Joshua. You don’t trust boys who flirt so openly with someone they don’t know, especially a service worker who’s forced to be polite, so you’d set yourself up to dislike things about him. His singing, however, you can’t fault.

Your shift ends around the same time his gig does, and you happen to emerge from the back right when he finishes packing up his equipment.

“Hey,” he greets, seeing you walking out from behind the counter. “What did you think?” You pause awkwardly by the door, turning to look back at him.

“Um, you were good. My boss chose well.” Joshua laughs at your answer, and you try to ignore how sparkly his eyes seem to be. As you exit the building, he follows suit.

“Are you headed to the bus stop?” He asks, quickly catching up with you. You shake your head, letting your hair down from its ponytail as you do and relishing in the night breeze blowing through it. 

“No, I live nearby. I just walk.” 

“Oh.” You ignore the crestfallen tone of his voice, shoving your hands into the pockets of your jacket. 

“Well, I’ll walk you that far, then,” he states. You glance at him and shrug.

“If you want.” 

“I do.” He grins at you, the light from the streetlamps igniting sparks in his eyes and making his skin glow. You avert your eyes, feeling your heart stutter at the sight of him; you were right to think he was dangerous. 

He stops walking at the bus stop, and although you continue walking you’re brought to a halt only a moment later when you hear him call your name. You hesitate then resolve to be polite and turn to him.

“It was nice meeting you,” he calls, beaming at you. With his guitar slung over his shoulder and his hair slightly tousled from the wind, he somehow looks almost harmless to you. You bite down on the inside of your cheek again, reminding yourself to tread carefully as you nod in response. 

“See you next Thursday?” He asks, and you swear he looks hopeful, his eyes glittering like the stars far above your town. 

“Yeah,” you reply, pushing a strand of hair out of your eyes and behind your ear. “Goodnight, Joshua.” Somehow, he seems to smile even more brightly and broadly at that, giving you a little wave. 

“Goodnight, Y/N.” 

The wind blows once again, and you turn into it, walking back to campus and wondering all the while about the honey-voiced guitarist and his intentions.

Although Joshua had occupied your mind heavily that Thursday night, by the next week you’ve nearly forgotten there’s a musician performing at the cafe. Nearly, though Joshua himself soon rectifies that by sidling up to the counter almost the moment you emerge from the kitchen. Thankfully, you’re able to hide your shock at his sudden appearance at the counter, plastering a polite smile onto your face.

“Just a second,” you say, and Joshua nods. You can feel his eyes on you as you place the trays of freshly baked goods on the racks in the case, and try not to feel nervous.

“What can I get for you?” You ask, brushing off your palms on your apron. 

“An americano,” he says, casually. You open your mouth to respond, but suddenly Joshua is leaning across the counter, his sparkly eyes gazing into your own and stunning you into silence,

“And your Snapchat. If you have one.” 

You aren’t often speechless, but it seems that Joshua is proving himself to be all kinds of surprising. You realize he’s still staring and attempt to snap yourself out of this strange stupor, furrowing your brows. 

“Um, I have one, yeah. I don’t use it much, though,” you say, but you still pull your phone out of your pocket and pull up the QR code. Joshua eagerly takes a photo — you wonder if he’s had Snapchat pulled up the whole time, just waiting. While he’s still messing around in the app, you slide your phone back off the counter and into your pocket, eyeing him warily all the while, hoping (belatedly) that you haven’t given him the wrong idea.

“Your drink should be ready soon.” Before Joshua can say anything else, you turn to the espresso machine, grateful that Yeri steps up to take the register as another customer enters the cafe. You aren’t sure what you’d do if you had to continue that conversation.

You wonder if it’s rude of you to ignore someone’s Snapchats for multiple hours at a time. It isn’t intentional — you don’t use the app much and your friends all know this, but not Joshua. 

And Joshua is always on Snapchat. You wonder if he’s this active on all of his social media accounts, and whether or not it’s a byproduct of his job choice, but you get at least four notifications a day from him and at best reply to one. It doesn’t deter him, however. You field the same number of notifications from him just about every day, and on the rare occasion that you post something on your Story he almost always sends a response.

A part of you feels bad, because he seems to be trying so hard to get your attention and you’ve been giving him responses which are mediocre at best, but then you try to remind yourself of his glittering eyes and the dangers in pursuing things that shine. Besides, you don’t really have the time to be playing some weird push-and-pull game with him — you’re a full-time student who works part-time, and as the end of the semester creeps ever nearer a musician boyfriend is the last thing you need. Not that you would want to date Joshua anyways, of course.

Or at least, that’s what you tell yourself. 

The third Thursday Joshua comes to perform is hell. You’ve hit a total block in your midterm paper for Lit class, you were almost late to work because you couldn’t find your cap, and once you got to work you almost immediately burnt your hand while washing out some of the mugs in the back. You’d been quick to get it under lukewarm water, but the skin at the base of your thumb is still an angry red. And to top it all off your phone keeps buzzing in the pocket of your apron, which normally wouldn’t bother you very much but under the current circumstances feels like what’s about to make you boil over. 

So, when Joshua breezes through the doors, all smiles and sunshine lingering on his skin, it’s enough to make your skin prickle with irritation. You avoid eye contact as he makes goes to set his guitar down on the stage, trying to ignore him even as he draws closer and closer to the counter—

“Hey,” he says, giving you an exaggerated pout when you glance up. “You never replied to my Snapchat today. How are we supposed to get a streak if you never respond?” You shrug lightly, barely sparing a moment to flash even half  smile his way. 

“I’m bad at keeping streaks.” Josh lets out a sigh, dropping his chin into his hand. He gazes up at you through his eyelashes, his fringe hanging down just past his eyebrows. You tell yourself you shouldn’t be wasting your time admiring him, but it’s the golden hour and even you can’t deny that Joshua is attractive. Even as it sets off alarm bells in your head, the glow of his skin is enticing, and the way he looks at you almost feels fond. You brush off the skip in your heartbeat as merely your blood pressure spiking after a rough day, and brush nonexistent dust off your apron, avoiding his gaze.

“Iced americano?” You ask, and Joshua is grinning when you cast a glance up at him. 

“You know me so well,” he purrs, and you’re disappointed in yourself for wanting to smile at the cute tone of his voice. This is exactly why you need to avoid someone like Joshua, this Venus flytrap of false charm. You clear your throat and tell yourself to get back to your senses, pulling a plastic cup off the stack and moving away from the register to the drink station. All the while, as usual, you feel Joshua’s eyes on you, his chin still propped in his hands. 

“But, really, you’re always so absent on social media,” he muses. “Why is that?”

“I have a life,” you deadpan, dumping a scoop of ice into his cup. As you set it under the espresso drip, you feel the atmosphere shift behind you.

“Come on, you can’t be that busy—”

“Don’t talk like you know me,” you snap, and Joshua falls silent. For a moment, the only sound is the grinding of coffee beans in the espresso machine. 

“Wait, do you actually not like me?” He asks. The loaded statement seems to fire an icy bullet straight into your heart, and when you lift your gaze from his drink your only thought is, oh. 

Oh. Maybe you’ve been reading this wrong all along, because Joshua looks genuinely crestfallen at your lack of response, at the revelation that you’ve been bothered by him all this time. 

“Ah. I see. I thought— never mind. I’m sorry for bothering you,” Joshua says, and he’s smiling but it doesn’t reach his eyes. For once his expression looks dull, faded, and you feel the knot in your stomach twist more tightly. Simultaneously you feel sick and winded as he makes his way back to his guitar, seated so he can’t glance up and make eye contact with you anymore. Funny how just those few inches seem to change so much, as you desperately try to get his attention, though to do what you’re not sure. After all, during a set isn’t a good time to apologize, and what would you even say? Your tongue is as twisted up as your stomach, and as a result you spend the rest of your shift away from the register. 

At the end of the night, Joshua practically throws his things together and is out the door before you can even untie your apron. By the time you pass his bus stop, he’s already in the middle of a small crowd of other locals waiting for their ride, his earbuds in to block out the noise of the city. 

You walk past. Then, like the first night you ever encountered Joshua, you halt and turn back to look at him — although this time, nobody is calling your name. Rather, he stands with his back resolutely turned to the rest of the sidewalk, guitar slung across it like a shield to protect him from your gaze. You sink your teeth into the inside of your cheek, biting down hard to distract yourself from the tell-tale tension you feel building in your jaw and temples. The breeze sweeps your hair in front of your eyes, and you take it as a sign to turn away from him and continue on your way home, an unfamiliar emptiness emerging in your chest. 

When the first tear slips down your cheek, you blame it on the wind. 

From that night forward, you make an active effort to reach out to Joshua. You try to find a balance, still just as busy as you were before and therefore as dormant on social media, but you find yourself trying to think of ways to make a mundane part of your day conversation-worthy.

Suffice to say, you aren’t very good at it. Joshua’s responses are few and far between, especially that Friday when all you can manage to send is a picture of your daily iced coffee and a snap out of one of the windows on the library’s top floor. You can’t blame him, of course; the tension is thick enough to be cut with a knife even when the two of you are connected only by an app, and given your tactlessness the night before you really don’t blame him for not wanting to chat.

But you hope that he sees that you’re trying, even though you’re too cowardly to apologize outright.

Things change on Saturday night.

For you, Saturday evenings are prime real estate for some much needed rest and relaxation, but you can tell from Joshua’s Story updates that his weekend is what you’d typically expect of a college student: he’s going to party.

You don’t Snapchat him much throughout the day, until you notice something — someone familiar in one of his updates. Although Junhui is only your lab partner, it seems like a golden opportunity for striking up a conversation with Joshua. Maybe you could finally ask him something about whether or where he goes to school at, or… something like that. When the image passes, you find yourself replaying Joshua’s entire Story once again just to continue mulling it over. You sink your teeth into your lower lip, and eventually you decide to bite the bullet and swipe up,

tell junhui i say hi lol >

As soon as you press send, you launch your phone to the other end of your couch and stubbornly turn the volume up a couple of notches on your television. God, what a stupid thing to say—

And yet, you hear the buzz of an incoming message, and when you can’t stand the suspense any longer you’re surprised to find it’s a response from Joshua. Rather than a text, he’s responded with a selfie where Jun has slung an arm around Joshua’s shoulders and is grinning excitedly. The caption tells you that Jun says hi, and yet you find yourself distracted by the boy whose smile is half cut off by the edge of the screen. It still doesn’t quite reach his eyes, and you feel the same guilt rising like bile in the back of your throat, slowly suffocating you until you can’t bear to reply — you merely turn off the screen and place the device face down, unable to even focus on your show anymore. 

Later in the evening, after the sun has set and you’ve settled deeply into the cushions of your couch, your phone buzzes again. You pick it up, expecting the screen to flash with a notification from one of your many apps urging you to log in, but you feel your heart skip a beat at the banner on your screen.

Snapchat

joshua is typing…

While you’re staring at the notification, wondering if it’s some sort of mistake, a second notification pops up from Snapchat letting you know that whatever Joshua was typing, he’s now sent your way. You feel a familiar sense of anxiety grip you, and you burrow down deeper into your blanket more for security than temperature as you unlock your phone and navigate to the notification. After one long, deep breath, you click on his chat message.

< y/nnnnnnnn

< y dont uu lije me??

< jun is waytyy moee annoyying

Before you can even begin to formulate a response, Josh’s bitmoji pops back up in the corner and he begins typing again. 

< its nott fair :(

< ur cute

< i’m cute

< whats nit to like????

You can feel your cheeks burning bright red as his bitmoji disappears again, leaving you staring at the screen. Your thumbs hover anxiously over your keyboard, teeth biting down on your lower lip almost until you think you’ll draw blood. What do you even say to that? Where do you start? 

Will he even remember this in the morning?

Will he regret it?

After a moment, you huff out a deep breath through your nose and start typing.

i’m sorry, josh. maybe we should talk about this when ur not drunk lol >

drink some water! goodnight >

Once again, you find yourself tossing your phone away from you to the end of the couch, quickly drawing your blanket up over your head so all you see is the familiar and comforting gray. You blame your flushed cheeks on the warmth of your fleece throw, trying to ignore the tension that seems to consume your entire body.

In the morning, as the sun creeps across the carpet through the slats in your shades, your phone buzzes. Blindly, you reach for it on your bedside table and drag it towards your face, cracking one eye open with the other squished against your pillow. You squint against the sudden brightness of your phone screen, but once you read the notification you suddenly feel very awake.

Snapchat

joshua is typing… 

You open the notification the moment he finishes typing, immediately feeling awkward for being so eager. 

< oh god

< i am SO sorry i had way too much to drink last night

< god that was probably really awkward

< whatever i did, pls just ignore it! sorry for bothering u haha

Your brow wrinkles in confusion, and you find yourself scrolling up—

His messages from the night before are gone. Belatedly, you realize that neither of you had saved them; him, because he was drunk, and you, because you were so caught off guard. Looking at the current conversation, with Joshua’s rushed and obviously embarrassed apology, you wonder if it would be better to just not tell him about what happened. Maybe you two were just meant to have this awkward non-relationship now, where you had to live with your mistakes because you didn’t know how to apologize for them.

And then, you realize, how this goes is up to you. You shouldn’t keep choosing to wallow in self-pity. 

it’s no problem >

i’m the one who made things awkward to begin with >

plus, calling me cute isn’t really something you need to apologize for lol >

< …i actually did that???

< ahh this is so embarrassing

You can’t help but laugh to yourself, imagining a flustered Joshua reading over your messages. You bite down on your lip to try and suppress the massive grin you can feel building, feeling a sudden burst of confidence from seeing this new side of Joshua.

don’t be embarrassed~ >

it was sweet! >

< are you sure? 

< it didn’t make you uncomfortable?

no!! >

if anything, it just made me realize how much i misjudged you… i’m sorry again about that >

For a while, your message goes unanswered, and in an attempt to take your mind off of the anxiety coursing through your veins you drag yourself out of bed to take a shower. You would be lying if you said you weren’t hoping for a reply when you emerged, but you try to push the disappointment out of your mind as you go about your daily routine. Since it’s the weekend, you don’t have many plans other than homework, which you fully intend to do while swaddled in blankets on your couch.

You’re looking through your fridge for breakfast ideas when your phone goes off, and despite all your intentions and what you’d like to tell yourself, you open the Snapchat notification almost immediately.

< i think we got off on the wrong foot

< are you free today?

You stop the refrigerator door from closing, trying desperately to use the cool air from the inside to cool your burning face. 

yeah! >

< do you want to get coffee? 

on one condition >

it’s my treat! >

Joshua agrees to your terms, and the two of you agree to meet at the cafe you work at in half an hour for a ‘fresh start’ in your relationship. After donning an outfit that you belatedly worry might be a little too casual for such a meeting, you slap on some makeup to even out your skin and practically sprint out of your apartment building. It isn’t until you get to the first crosswalk that you manage to calm yourself down, taking in a deep breath through your nose. 

You reach the cafe before Joshua does, and you go ahead and order his usual and a cold brew for yourself, as well as a pastry because catching a whiff of the baked goods reminds you that you haven’t eaten anything yet today. 

“Two drinks?” Yeri asks from behind the register, grinning mischievously. 

“Hush,” you say, looking down as you dig in your bag for your wallet in an attempt to keep her from noticing your blushing face. 

It turns out to be a fruitless endeavor. You and Yeri have worked together far too long, and you’ve never regretted it until now. You hear the door opening and refuse to look, but you can tell it’s Joshua just based on Yeri’s facial expression alone. She slyly looks back towards you, her grin broadening as she watches you squirm under her gaze.

“I don’t need my receipt,” you say, quickly, snatching your card back from her with a warning look. She simply giggles, not at all fazed by your half-baked threats — probably because she saw your hand trembling when you reached for your card. 

“Your drinks will be right out,” she sings, and you grimace. A laugh sounds from behind you, and despite the fact that you knew he was in the building you still find yourself startled by his presence.

“You weren’t kidding about paying,” he remarks, and you shake your head, hoping he can’t see how nervous you are behind your smile.

“What can I say,” you shrug, following Joshua to a table by one of the large windows. “I’m a woman of my word.” As the two of you sit down, you find yourself overcome by nerves once again.

“I ordered you an iced americano,” you say, fidgeting with the sleeves of your sweater. “I hope that’s okay.”

“Of course,” he replies sweetly, and you look up to find his gaze steady, comforting. 

“So, uh, how was the party?” You ask, averting your gaze. Joshua lets out a groan, causing your gaze to snap back to him as he closes his eyes and slumps down into his seat.

“Don’t remind me,” he whines. “I’m so embarrassed.” You can’t help but laugh when you catch sight of him blushing, leaning across the table slightly. You gently pat the back of his hand in reassurance, giggling all the while at his antics.

“Come on, it could’ve been worse! You could’ve hit on Junhui or something.” Joshua shoots you a scandalized look, which only makes you laugh more, and as you find yourself overcome by your bout of laughter you don’t even notice the softening of Joshua’s gaze until you look squarely at him again.

“What?” You ask, half breathless. You find yourself smoothing your hair behind your ears nervously as Joshua leans his elbows on the table, one cheek cradled in his hand.

“Nothing,” he sings, though his smile grows more mischievous under your attention. “Just thinking that you’re a lot prettier than Junhui, so I guess my drunken antics weren’t the worst.” You open your mouth to respond, but are interrupted by one of your coworkers coming by to drop off your coffees and pastry. You thank them quietly before turning your attention back to Joshua, although you focus your gaze on your coffee soon after, stirring the straw around in your glass to be sure it’s chilled enough. 

“Are you always such a flirt, Joshua?” You ask, your gaze briefly flitting up to catch his. He looks almost nervous until his eyes dart to the up-turned corners of your mouth, and then he drags his glass closer to his edge of the table, leaning conspiratorially over it to capture your full attention.

“No,” he says, matter-of-factly. “Only if I think the person is worthy of the compliment.” The mischief in his smile doesn’t quite reach his eyes, which are warm and sincere as they meet yours, leaving you stunned almost to the point of breathlessness. You clear your throat and smooth down the napkin on your laugh, feeling a blush heat up your cheeks.

“Oh,” you murmur, and Josh beams across the table at you as you nervously take a bite of your croissant. 

The rest of the morning passes amicably, the sunshine pouring through the windows across the table you’re sitting at and illuminating Joshua’s face. You can’t get the glowing image of him out of your head for the rest of the day. (Or week, if you’re being honest.) By the time you’ve departed from the cafe and reach Joshua’s bus stop the city is verging on the golden hour, turning Joshua’s eyes to dark honey — the sweetest kind there is. 

“Text me when you get home, okay?” He states, more an order than a request, and you find yourself nodding, brushing your hair behind your ear as the breeze gently blows between you. 

“Okay.” As Joshua turns away, you find yourself halting in your steps, turning back to look at him as he goes to stand by the curb.

“Joshua!” You call, the wind carrying your voice to him. He looks up, the sun bathing him in shades of gold, all manner of warm and sweet things, the taste of sugar lingering on your lips when you nervously sweep your tongue over them—

“I’ll see you Thursday?” You offer, and although for a moment you feel your heart sinking at your foolishness, you end up rewarded by Joshua’s generous, beaming smile as it outshines the sun behind him.

“Looking forward to it.” 

With one last smile shared between you, you turn on your heel and practically float your way back home, relieved (and somewhat bewildered) by the weightlessness you feel in your chest. 

By the time Thursday comes again, you can’t remember what being awkward around Josh even felt like. Or, at least, being awkward over messaging apps — sometimes when Joshua looks at you a certain way, or sends a selfie of himself giving you a specific look, you find yourself feeling flustered, but it’s not the same as before. In less than a week, your whole perception of Joshua has changed. Rather than the narcissistic fuckboi you’d thought he was, you realized he was just a cute dork who had decided to take a chance on flirting with you. You shouldn’t be surprised to find yourself catching feelings for him, but it feels shocking nonetheless each time you notice your heart skipping a beat when he calls you cute, or pretty.

And yet, despite all of that, you still doubt Joshua’s interest in you romantically. He’s so candid it somehow makes you question things still. Plus, now that he knows you, awkwardness and all, you wonder how and why someone like him (handsome, gentlemanly, talented) would like someone like you. 

On Thursday, you put on a little more makeup than you usually do for work, and find yourself giddy for your evening shift — a fact which Yeri notices and uses as an excuse to tease you for the full hour of your shift before Joshua shows up.

“So you agree after all,” she says, lifting her chin proudly. You can feel your cheeks turning red and duck your head, inspecting the inside of the bakery case.

“I don’t know what you’re referring to.” She slaps your arm gently with a rag.

“Joshua being cute! Why do you have to be so stubborn?” She whines, and you don’t even have to look at her to see the exaggerated pout on her face. You open your mouth to reply, but the door swinging open stops you both in your tracks.

“Hi!” Yeri chirps, waving at Joshua. He pulls his hand away from his windswept hair he’d been rearranging to wave back at her, but his eyes barely land on her for a moment before his gaze skips over to you. His expression softens, and you feel your knees turn to jelly. How is it he can look so casual and still be so attractive? 

“Hey Yeri,” he says, walking up to the counter, guitar still slung over his shoulder. His eyes don’t leave yours, and you remain rooted to the spot. “Y/N.” Your name rolls off his tongue like honey, and you feel warm all over, as though his gaze is enveloping you. 

“Hey,” you reply, biting down on the inside of your cheek to suppress a smile. 

It takes the door opening again for you to come back to your senses, side-stepping over to the espresso machine. 

“Uh,” you clear your throat, trying to compose yourself now that you aren’t looking directly at Joshua. “Iced americano?” 

“Always,” he laughs, and the sound makes your heart flutter. You want to tell him to stop being so cute, but after spending the week talking to him you realize it’s just in his nature to be like this, and if it’s anyone’s fault it’s yours for being so affected by him. 

You expect him to go unpack his guitar at the stage and settle there, but instead he lingers near the end of the bar, waiting for his drink. His gaze prickles against the back of your neck, and you focus unnecessarily hard on the pouring water into the cup to try and tamp down your blush. 

“Here you go,” you chirp, pushing the drink across the counter to him. Joshua wraps his hand around it as you’re letting go, fingers brushing and sending a jolt of electricity through you — and yet the sensation is nothing compared to the feeling you get when he looks into your eyes, a slight blush dusting his own cheeks to the tips of his ears.

“Are you staying for the whole set?” He asks, softly, and you can’t help but laugh.

“Yeah,” you reply, grabbing a straw for him from the box to your left. He takes it from you absentmindedly. “I work until then, anyways. Unless you’re playing an extended show tonight.” Joshua shakes his head, smile broadening, and you swear you almost see relief in his eyes. 

“Nope, same amount of time as always. Just wanted to be sure.” He unwraps the straw and pokes it through the lid, but before he turns away from the counter completely he shoots you one of his mischievous cat-like grins, “Needed to make sure my biggest fan was going to be in attendance.” You roll your eyes, snatching the straw paper from his hand and swatting gently at his shoulder as you do so.

“Yah, Joshua Hong, don’t get cocky just because we’re friends now.” He laughs, countenance brightening to rival the sun outside the cafe.

“I wouldn’t dream of it, Y/N.” With that, he makes his way over to the stage, and although you try your best not to stare at him as he goes, Yeri catches you anyways.

“Shut it,” you warn, but she simply grins innocently at you, batting her eyelashes, leaving you rolling your eyes as you restock the cups. 

Joshua’s set goes by in its usual way, though it warms your heart when you notice more people than usual seem to be there to see him perform. Despite the influx of customers, you still manage to tune into a lot of Joshua’s songs, sometimes finding yourself humming along to the covers he’s singing as you brew drinks. Just like always, his eyes seem to drift to catch yours, a gentle smile curling the corners of his lips.

“Thank you,” he says, after taking a sip of coffee, readjusting himself on his stool. He ducks his head, grateful yet bashful as the crowd in the cafe applauds his cover. A glance at the clock tells you your shift is almost over, and Joshua appears to do the same, letting out a little sigh as he runs a hand through his hair.

“Unfortunately, I only have time for one more song,” he starts, running the fingers of one hand nervously along the strings of his guitar. “I want to try something a little different. This next song is an original, I hope you all like it.” His smile broadens briefly when his eyes catch yours, before he lightly clears his throat. You watch as the gentle, warm light of the cafe envelopes him, and Yeri gently nudges you away from the register and closer to the side of the counter where you’ll have the best view of Josh. When you look back at her questioningly, she only winks in response, but before you can say anything you’re interrupted by Joshua’s honeyed voice as it fills the room,

온종일 정신 없이 바쁘다가도

(All day, I’m crazy busy)

틈만 나면 니가 생각나

(But I still think of you whenever I can)

언제부터 내 안에 살았니

(Since when did you live inside of me?)

참 많이 웃게 돼 너 때문에 난

(I smile so much because of you)

As the song progresses, you find yourself nodding along with it, not caring to tone down the fondness in your expression as you look at Josh. After all, his gaze is on the rest of the audience in the cafe, not you.

어느새 너의 모든 것들이 편해지나 봐

(I’m getting more comfortable with all of you)

부드러운 미소도 나지막한 목소리도

(Your soft smile and your low voice)

Suddenly, Joshua turns to look straight at you, and your heart skips a beat as he leans into the mic with his eyes still locked on yours, 

You- 아직은 얘기할 수 없지만

(You, I still can’t tell you)

나 있잖아 니가 정말 좋아

(But I really like you)

사랑이라 말하긴 어설플지 몰라도

(Maybe it’s not love yet)

아주 솔직히 그냥 니가 참 좋아

(But honestly, I really like you)

It’s the second time you’ve found yourself having an ‘oh’ moment with Joshua, and even though he looks back into the audience, you still can’t seem to tear your gaze away from the faint pink blush dusting his cheeks. You barely notice any of the other lyrics he’s singing, your heart beating so rapidly you can hear it in your ears. It isn’t until Yeri nudges you with her shoulder that you realize the cafe patrons are applauding Joshua, who bows his head with that same sheepish smile painted across his face. On autopilot, you find yourself clapping along, slowly making your way into the back to hang up your staff apron and grab your coat and bag. You wonder, all the while, if you’re reading too much into this, trying desperately to shake yourself out of this stupor before you have to walk out and face Joshua. 

Which happens a bit sooner than usual, since Joshua is already packed up and ready to go by the time you’ve exited the staff room. He looks up from his phone and smiles, shoving the device in his pocket. 

“Ready to go?” You can only manage to nod in response, nervously running your fingers through your hair and quietly muttering a thank you when he holds the door open for you. 

The autumn evening sun casts long shadows of the both of you, bodies stretching endlessly along the sidewalk before you. You keep your eyes trained on your own shadow, in pursuit of the figure you can never reach, and you don’t realize you’ve reached the bus stop until Joshua’s shadow hand is suddenly melting into yours.

“Hey,” he murmurs, voice as gentle as his touch. He passes his thumb over your knuckles, brows furrowed as you turn to face him. “Everything okay?” His gaze is almost heartbreaking in its tenderness, and you feel yourself sinking ever deeper into the warm honey-brown of his eyes. You shake your head, trying to snap yourself out of it, and chuckle nervously as you pass a hand over your hair again.

“Yeah, sorry,” you say. “Just, you know, overthinking.” Looking at Joshua suddenly feels like looking at the sun, so you avert your gaze to the ground where your shadows of your shoes on the pavement meld together, surrounded by the golden evening light. 

“Do you wanna talk about it?” He speaks low, as though it’s a secret between the two of you and the autumn sky he’s imploring you to share as he gently squeezes your fingers. 

“I know we haven’t been friends for long,” he continues, and you can feel the earnestness of his gaze on you, even as you can’t bring yourself to look at him for fear of your heart leaping out of your chest. “But I want you to know, you can tell me anything, Y/N.”

“Thank you,” you say, and you mean it. You close your eyes for a moment, building up the courage to ask Joshua about his song before it’s swept away for good be the wind.

“Just— I know I might be reading too into things, but, your song tonight,” you start, and you glance up at Joshua only to look away out of fear of losing your nerve under his glowing gaze. He gently squeezes your hand again, rubbing small circles into the back of it with his thumb. 

“I mean, we got off on the wrong foot, I know, but you were looking right at me during the chorus. A-and you’ve been flirting with me pretty much since we met, but—” 

Suddenly, you feel the warmth of Joshua’s fingertips beneath your chin, slowly turning your face up to look into his. 

“No buts,” he laughs, eyes sparkling playfully. “I was starting to think you’d never catch on! Since I think this is what you were rambling about: yes, I really like you, Y/N.”

You like to think you’re a level-headed person, and generally that you’re good at keeping your emotions in check, and yet when Joshua Hong looks directly into your eyes with a smile and says he likes you, the only response you can formulate is a high-pitched whine as you cover your face with your hands.

“How can you say that so calmly?” You bemoan, eyes squeezed tightly shut as you feel Joshua pulling your hands away from your face.

“You’re cute,” he says, half-teasing, holding both your hands in his. With his newfound leverage he pulls you closer to him, and you find yourself stunned into opening your eyes. 

“So,” he starts, his mouth curled up in the corners in that same cat-like grin he’s sported since you met him. “Does that mean you like me back?” 

“Do I really have to say it?” 

“I don’t know,” he replies, leaning in so close you can feel his breath fanning across your lips. “Do you?” You shift your weight awkwardly from one foot to another before finally letting out a sigh, looking down at the ground.

“솔직히 그냥 니가 참 좋아 (honestly, I really like you)…” you sing softly, under your breath. You almost cringe at yourself, especially when you’re met only by silence from Josh. Unable to take it any longer, you force yourself to look up—

Only to find Joshua blushing, grinning bashfully down at the sidewalk. 

“Oh?” You start, leaning down to get a better look at his face. “Have I finally flustered Joshua Hong? I never thought I’d see the day!” He huffs out a laugh in disbelief, 

“You’re full of surprises, aren’t you?” Despite the teasing edge to his voice, it’s practically dripping with fondness that borders on admiration and brings your heart to a skipping halt in your chest for half a beat. Joshua’s gaze holds yours intently, hands still holding onto yours. After a moment, he squeezes your hands, taking a deep breath—

“Can I kiss you?” He asks abruptly, eyes searching, and when you lean up to press your lips to his you wonder if maybe you’re being too eager. But there’s no room for you to regret, for as sweet as Joshua’s voice is, his lips are doubly as honeyed.

And so it’s no surprise to you that that kiss is the first of many.

[a-student-out-of-time]

ASOOT Timeline: September 2012 (Cloudy with a Chance of Cults)

The time has come. Grab your umbrellas, put on your raincoats, and settle in. We’ve got a Storm to deal with.–Timeline Anon

September 25:

Nikei visits Setsuka. He’s been looking up information about Maverick, and he’s discovered that literally every foster parent Maverick ever had committed suicide. Setsuka relates the story of the one time she met Maverick when she was at Hope’s Peak; he told Umeko that Setsuka thought she was a disgusting pervert, Umeko avoided Setsuka for a week out of guilt before Setsuka found out what was going on, and when Setsuka confronted Maverick about this, he threatened her with a disturbing anecdote about how people are like baby birds. She changes the subject to ask how things are between Nikei and Taira. Nikei confesses that he does like her, but he doesn’t know what his sexual orientation is, and trying to figure it out has been a minefield of issues in and of itself. Pretty much the only thing he’s worked out so far is that he tends to get crushes on people who are kind to him. Setsuka hugs him and tells him that how he labels himself is entirely his decision and that he’s a good person who deserves happiness. Right before he leaves, Nikei asks about Setsuka’s family, and she hints that she has issues with her mother.

Sonia makes breakfast for the Cuddle Puddle (minus Hajime and Hiyoko, who are still at Izumi’s). Iroha stops by and shows them her drawings of the people in Mikako’s vision. Hibiki is very happy to hear that she and Hajime will have a daughter, and Mikan is reassured by the implication that her adoption of Kotoko will be successful. This is a timeline they definitely want to work towards.

While Maku is out on an early morning jog, he comes across a wall of 20 different missing person posters, including one of Kanon. All of the missing people vanished from their homes between August 20 and August 22. Maku lets the other Voids know right away, and they in turn inform the rest of the Quantum Crew.

At Hope’s Peak, Chiaki and Mikan find out that the Student Council has been hit hard by the mass disappearances. Aiko’s online friend Damian is gone, as is Kiriko’s younger brother Hiroyuki. Both of them were acting depressed before their disapperances. Chiaki and Mikan promise Aiko and Kiriko that they will find everyone who went missing. They suspect that Maverick is involved.

Yoruko goes to Takayama and visits her old senpai, Minako Tomori, who is the mother of Kizuna Tomori. Minako and Yoruko both apologize about what happened when they last saw each other 13 years ago, and they agree to be friends again. As they reminisce over old pictures, Minako tells Yoruko that she was a single teen mom during her hostess days and that she was working that job to provide for not only her younger siblings, but baby Kizuna as well. Now, Kizuna is a vivacious albeit materialistic teenager who is the most popular girl at school and the captain of her cheerleading squad. However, Minako is concerned about the attention Kizuna gets (and encourages) from boys, and she worries that it might be her own fault for how she raised her. Minako is happy to hear that Yoruko has a girlfriend, though.

Sora keeps watch over Yuki’s house and nearly has a panic attack when he’s late coming home. He does show up eventually, but he seems sad, and he looks at something in a drawer before going to have dinner with his mom. 

Umeko and Kokoro have to go back to Hope’s Peak to deal with the new situation. Mikako insists on tagging along, as she thinks that her powers were meant to help save people. Kokoro initially refuses because she doesn’t want to put her daughter in danger, but after Umeko points out that having Mikako there might be a benefit for the Quantum Crew, Kokoro agrees under the condition that she stays safe at Hope’s Peak. Yamato is also coming with them.

There are now 53 people missing. The Quantum Crew and their allies in Class 77-B meet at Hope’s Peak to discuss what they know so far. Most of the disappearances are of teenagers, they all showed signs of depression, and they all seem to have left their houses on their own. Kyoji argues that the crew must devote all their resources to dealing with Maverick as soon as possible, lest he use indoctrination to create a cult, but Chisa and Chiaki think he’s being reckless and underestimating the police’s possible involvement in order to leap at the chance for revenge. They talk him down and help him to remember that he’s part of a team that needs to work together. They also encourage him to reach out to Miaya. Sora pops by with the news that she’s found a mysterious code amidst the deleted data on Damian’s computer.

As Hajime and Hiyoko get ready to head back home, Izumi tells Hiyoko that while she’s disappointed in her decision to marry Hajime, she will accept it, but she’s keeping an eye on them. Also, she’s not pulling Hiyoko out of Hope’s Peak, at least not for now. Hiyoko hugs Izumi and thanks her for listening to her. Hajime and Hiyoko are pretty much engaged now, and Hajime promises to take Hiyoko to see her parents after the Maverick situation is dealt with.

There are now 72 people missing. Kazuichi’s trying to crack the code, with some online help from Chihiro, while Sora’s checking the websites in Damian’s search history to see where he could’ve gotten it from. Kyoji has a brainstorm and realizes that the code is a VPN password. The gang wonders how Maverick sent out the VPN, and Ibuki suggests that it was sent throught the mail. Chiaki goes to ask Kiriko if Hiroyuki got anything strange in the mail, and she mentions finding a brochure on his desk for a place called Sunny Days Vacation Island…the same brochure that was delivered to the Cuddle Puddle yesterday. 

Sora checks on Yuki’s house again, but it’s too late. He’s gone.

Hibiki brings the brochure to the rest of the group just as a distraught Sora tells them about Yuki’s disappearance. They find a QR code on the brochure, and scanning it allows access to the VPN. After Sora checks to make sure there’s nothing on it that can brainwash anyone, the Quantum Crew watches the Sunny Days video. It’s Maverick Storm, offering an escape from all the pain and stress of life at Sunny Days Vacation Island, where you can focus on enjoying yourself and never have to worry about anything ever again. The Quantum Crew is horrified.

//And so it begins : P

[smoakmonster]

G is for Gadgets and Gimmicks {3/3}

A/N:‌‌ ‌Well‌ ‌folks,‌ ‌the‌ ‌conclusion‌ ‌to‌ ‌my‌ ‌little‌ ‌bookstore‌ ‌AU‌ ‌is‌ ‌finally‌ ‌here!!‌ ‌Sorry‌ ‌for‌ ‌the‌ ‌extreme‌ ‌delay‌ ‌in‌ ‌finishing‌ ‌out‌ ‌this‌ ‌series.‌ ‌I‌ ‌appreciate‌ ‌all‌ ‌of‌ ‌your‌ ‌sweet‌ ‌responses‌ ‌to‌ ‌this‌ ‌fic.‌ ‌There’s‌ ‌just‌ ‌something‌ ‌so‌ ‌precious‌ ‌about‌ ‌fluffy‌ ‌Olicity,‌ ‌isn’t‌ ‌there?‌ ‌I‌ ‌hope‌ ‌you‌ ‌enjoy‌ ‌the‌ ‌wrap-up!‌ ‌Thank‌ ‌you‌ ‌again‌ ‌for‌ ‌reading!‌ 

‌Special‌ ‌thanks‌ ‌to:‌ ‌‌pleasantfanandstudent‌ ‌for‌ ‌this‌ ‌adorable‌ ‌cover‌ ‌art!‌ ‌

(Part‌ ‌1)‌ ‌(Part‌ ‌2)‌ ‌(Read‌ ‌on‌ ‌AO3)‌

***

com∙pro∙mise (v.)

3. to cause to become vulnerable or function less effectively

***

“Hey, the QR code on the door isn’t working, so do I still get the coupon?”

Oliver glances up from meticulously arranging rows of his latest mini-soufflé experiment to find a gangly teenage boy (probably a college freshman) watching him with expectation and just a hint of entitlement. 

He frowns, stifling a sigh. “The what?”

This has been happening a lot lately. Interruptions. Deep down, Oliver knows that any form of interruption is a good interruption, that droves of customers, albeit annoying ones, do not detract from his work, but rather are the purpose of it. Strangers mean business. They mean another day where he gets to make payroll and keep his archaic practice of second-hand bookselling from dying out. 

He’s not sure when or why or how his antiquated cardboard box of a business managed to draw this sudden influx of cantankerous college kids buried in cancer-causing gadgets, but he has his suspicions. Perhaps it has something to do with this QR...something? While Oliver may not understand ninety-percent of the latest digital discourse, he does know what a coupon is. And he’s pretty sure he would remember issuing said coupon. 

As though the fringes of his very thoughts have pulled her forth by a string, the oh-so-familiar staccato of heels on old wood flooring tears Oliver’s attention.

“I’ve got this,” Felicity says brightly, with a brief hand on his arm. She inserts herself into the conversation with ease, brushing past Oliver to smooth things over with the impatient customer. 

Her touch is so quick that for a second he thinks he might have imagined it. Only the warm buzzing just below the surface of skin is proof that it was real. In truth, her touch has become a more regular occurrence. This marks at least Number 10. Not that he’s keeping track. Not that his body even remembers. Every reaction is like the first time.

Simple, innocent little touches that cause his mind to stray to dangerous places. She probably has no idea the effect she has on him. 

Felicity suddenly peeks his way and shoots him a quick wink. Or more like her attempt a wink. The squinty-eyed delayed blink is so endearingly Felicity that Oliver has never had the desire to correct her. 

So maybe she has some idea.

Oliver shakes his head with a soft smile. He’s not sure when this happened, either, but somewhere along the way Felicity and he stopped exchanging the usual social greetings and formal pleasantries. Now, she just barges into his store with as much zeal and belonging as Thea. 

The conversion taking place directly in front of him quickly devolves into Domain Lookup and Cloud Networking, and a mere five sentences in Oliver finds himself on the periphery. Feeling inept and oddly foolish, as he so often does in the presence of Felicity Smoak, and yet also a bit bereft that this kid can keep up with her whirlwind trail of thoughts and he cannot, Oliver decides to venture into the nonfiction recesses of the store. The only safe haven he has left apparently. 

Oliver finds himself gravitating towards the cramped little nook nestled alongside the brick fireplace that’s been inoperable since Plymouth Rock (Thea’s words, not his). Last year on a whim, Oliver tried cleaning out the old fireplace and ended up drowning himself and the entire back of the store in soot. He spent days washing soot out his hair. Thea got a real kick out of that, dubbing the incident Gray Day.

Even now, it is not uncommon for the occasional customer to find a book sprinkled with the stuff and mistake it for dust. 

The conversation up front grows muffled, lending a calm stillness to this part of the store. Hardly anyone ever ventures back here, partly because the aisles are more narrow and the lighting is poor, and partly because according to Rene it smells like a murder happened here. As if the kid knows what a murder smells like. 

Personally, Oliver kind of likes the pine and leather aroma. It reminds him of simpler times, when Dad and he would go camping in the woods every summer. Oliver chuckles, remembering what a poor sport he could be and how patiently Dad taught him how to start a fire and set up a tent. He’d give anything to get more days like that with his father. More days at all, really.

What would it be like to get away like that again? Even just for a weekend? To go somewhere off-grid, no cell reception, no emails, no internet or WiFi or QR Codes or...

A flash of yellow binding catches his eye, and Oliver spots a book haphazardly stuffed on the third shelf. Carefully, he yanks the book out and reads the cover. Beginning Programming for Dummies. 

A huff escapes him. It seems he can’t get away fast enough. 

Curiosity getting the better of him, Oliver flips through the book, hopelessly searching, but not really wanting anything to stick. Maybe something in here will remind him of Felicity. Maybe if he can find even one word embedded in all these hieroglyphics, he’ll be able to make more sense of her world and actually be able to communicate with her about the things that are important to her. 

But with every turn of the page, every heading and diagram just serves to confuse him all the more. With a frustrated groan, Oliver slams the book shut and attempts to shove it back into its tight crevice; at this point, he couldn’t care less if the book’s misshelved. 

“Hey, what did that book ever do to you?”

Oliver stills. Her voice both jars and soothes him. 

Feeling strangely guilty, he turns around but has trouble meeting her gaze, stuffing his hands into his pockets, as though he’s been caught cutting up in Mrs. Hannoven’s fourth grade class again. “Sorry,” he mumbles. 

Felicity tips her head, wearing that adorably confused pout of hers. “I’m not sure I’m the one who needs you to apologize.” 

“Oh. Um…” Does she seriously want him to apologize to a book?

“What I mean is…” She takes several steps closer to him and has the decency of a saint to wait until he’s looking her in the eye before she continues. “Oliver, I’m sorry.”

“What?” What on earth could she possibly have to be sorry for? 

“I shouldn’t have pushed for the QR codes. I knew it was too soon, but I just got so excited after all of my contacts agreed to help sponsor your website. And then, during a webinar last Thursday there was this study that said QR codes can help increase foot traffic by upwards of 30%. And I thought, ‘Hey, that seems like it could work for my friend Oliver’—I hope it’s not too presumptuous that I called you my friend. We are friends, right? Of course we’re friends, what else would we be? It’s not like we’re exactly colleagues or anything—”

“Felicity.” He rests his hands on her shoulders, effectively halting her ramble, a tried and true tact. And if she happens to shift a bit closer to him as a result, well, who is he to stop her?

He likes this about them. That in this one, predictable way he can give her the same sense of quiet security she gives him.  

“Yes, we are friends,” he says, giving her a slight smile, the finality of the word friends sinking into his gut. After all, it’s like she said. What else could they be? She is so many leagues out of his league. He's t-ball, and she's the Seattle Mariners. He doesn’t even own a digital watch, much less a smart watch. What could she possibly want with a guy like him?

Clearing his throat, Oliver moves on, “And I don’t know if I’ve said this to you yet, but...thank you. I really do appreciate everything you’ve done to help me out here.”

“Really?” That tentative, searching look makes him want to pull her close and wrap her up in his arms. She only wears that look when she’s seeking approval. She wears it a lot around him. Though why she’s still aching for his approval is beyond him. She’s had his approval and more since that first rainy Sunday. 

“Yeah. Although I do have to ask…”

Felicity raises her eyebrows. 

“When did I start offering coupons?”

“Oh. Um...since last week?”

“Uh-huh,” he nods, not wanting to cave just yet but secretly pleased. It’s a smart ploy, even if it was never part of his original plan. So much of their relationship and business schemes are way outside the bounds of his original plans. And he’s a better person for it. 

Looking a little too pleased with herself, Felicity reaches into her pocket, pulls out a slip of memo pad paper, and hands it to him.

“What’s this?”

“It’s a list of all the computer science books you need to stock up on before the Starling University summer quarter starts up. There’s an Advanced Algorithms course that’s only offered once a year, and I have it on good authority that the college bookstore never carries enough textbooks. And let’s be honest, your computer science section is lacking. Pretty much all of your STEM material, actually.”

Oliver huffs a laugh. “What are you, my sales rep?”

“I could be.” She gives him a knowing look, telling him he can either waste time arguing with her about this or just accept the inevitable. 

And after altering all the basic mechanics of his store, what are a few additional books really going to do? 

“In the meantime, let’s see this little guy back to his proper home.” Felicity proceeds to extricate his paperback nemesis and saunter further down the narrow aisle, looking for the right Dewey Decimal destination. 

“I also think we should advertise at the grad school,” she calls over her shoulder.

“We?” he replies, following her down the aisle.

“Yeah, bring in some study groups. Do you know there is a perfectly good History and English Literature study hall that meets at the Starbucks around the corner, when they could be meeting here?”

“No. No. I don’t do study groups.” He’s caved on a lot of things, but there has to be a line somewhere. And so help him, if this is the hill he has to die on to preserve even one ounce of dignity, then so be it. 

“Since when?”

“Since always. Felicity, they’re a bunch of toddlers who leave scone crumbs all over the floor and never actually buy any books.”

Felicity just chuckles at him, and if he were in a better mood he might actually be able to enjoy the sweet sound. “Oliver, stop being such a grumpy old man.” 

“No, Felicity, I think—”

She’s already moving up the ladder before he can stop her. The rickety, unstable pile of firewood that technically qualifies as a ladder he’s been harassing Rene about pitching for months. Honestly, he’d all but forgotten it was still tucked away back here. 

While she makes her way up the rungs, Oliver latches onto the base, holding the ladder firmly in place. With an excruciating amount of restraint that he barely even knew he had in him, Oliver watches her heels lift up and settle on each rung, all the while discreetly avoiding a glance at her pencil skirt. Not even a peek.

The ladder shakes as Felicity engages in a wrestling match with the top shelf. “It. Won’t. Go. In,” she says through gritted teeth. Finally, on the third push, Felicity lets out a strong exhale of relief. After wiping her hands, she makes her descent. 

Like a hawk following its prey, Oliver keeps his gaze glued to her feet. Even so, he’s still not quite prepared when one of those black t-straps slips, throwing her off balance and tumbling straight into his arms. 

“Oliver!”

He catches her easily, pulling her soft frame snuggly against him. Felicity wastes no time in wrapping her arms tightly around his neck. “Hey, I gotcha. I gotcha.” 

Her head plops against his shoulder, her warm, rapid breaths tickling his neck. He tightens his own grip around her back and under her knees, as if to reassure himself that she’s alright. 

“You okay?” he finally asks.

Her only answer is to press her cheek more deeply into his shirt, her soft hair nuzzling against his jaw. He catches a faint whiff of her strawberry shortcake shampoo.  

“My hero,” she breathes without a trace of humor. 

I’m no hero, he wants to say. It’s his gut reaction any time a single mom commends him for his “Cool Books” section that finally got her teenage son to try a book of his own accord. As though selling books can compare with saving lives every day. His greatest risk comes in the form of avoiding papercuts. And rescuing toppling patrons apparently. 

Selfishly, he’s currently enjoying the feel of Felicity in his arms a little too much to be considered a hero. Can she feel his own racing heartbeat beneath her ear? 

He clears his throat but fails to put any real distance between them without releasing her. He’s not ready for that just yet. He’ll prolong the sweet agony for as long as physically possible. 

“Well, this is a bit compromising,” he admits. 

“Compromising?” She snickers, lifting her head, a spark of mirth shining behind her eyes that wasn’t there before. “What are you, a Jane Austen character?”

“Blame Thea. She made me read them. It was in our original founders’ agreement. I have the contract to prove it.”

If you’re going to own a bookstore, Ollie, then you have to know who Mr. Darcy is. It’s a requirement. Plus, it’s catnip for women. Nothing gets girls more excited than if you acknowledge the perfection of Jane Austen protagonists.

That knowledge has never served him until this moment. Until Felicity.

He still hasn’t liberated her, and she seems in no hurry to be free of him. His ego far too eagerly takes note of that. 

“Are you making an actual joke, Mr. Queen?” Her smile is contagious. “You know, if this were a novel, this would be the part where we would um…” She flushes, her gaze suddenly faltering to his mouth. 

His heart jumps to his throat, pounding with misguided hope. While he’s not an avid reader, despite his self-appointed line of work, he can read between the lines now. And he knows Felicity well enough to know that she only ever blushes over accidental innuendos.

She can’t really mean it. Can she?

“Where what?” he asks gruffly, not trusting himself to crave more than she is ready to give him, yet aching for a way to turn fiction into a reality, to give Felicity Smoak her happy ending. And maybe find his own in the process. 

She doesn’t pull away. She doesn’t correct her misstep. She just watches him with a strange and quiet expectancy. 

Oliver gently shifts his hold, bringing her a bit closer, leaning down to meet her. The tip of his nose brushes against hers, and when she lingers there with him, it’s all the invitation he needs…

“Hey, boss, we got a spill behind the counter!”

Felicity starts in his arms, and Oliver very nearly groans. Of all the times for Rene to interrupt him. The spill is probably minor. How many times does he need to remind his employees that if you make a mess, you should just clean it up yourself?

“Ollie?” calls Thea. Her voice comes from far too nearby for his comfort. It must be a real pickle if Rene’s managed to rope his sister into the ordeal. 

Reluctantly, Oliver loosens his grip on Felicity, and she slides right out of his arms with a graceful plop, returning their difference in height to its usual status. The top of her head aligning with the level of his heart. 

“I uh…” His entire vocabulary seems to have vacated his brain at present, leaving him feeling ten times more abashed than he was ten minutes ago. 

Felicity tucks a golden strand behind her ear, still dodging his regard with robust persistence. “Yeah, you should go...take care of that…”

He nods once, not that she notices. As he slowly turns to walk away, she stops him with a simple question. 

“Same time tomorrow?”

He really should not put much stock in the hope her voice carries. But he can’t seem to stifle the grin spreading over his face when he glances back over his shoulder. “Same time tomorrow.”

***

Thea pulls out a small chalkboard from under the counter, erases the number ‘1’ with her fist, and then writes a ‘2’ in its place. The sign now reads “12 Days Since Last Attempt To Date.”

Scowling, Oliver is almost too afraid to ask. “Thea...what is that?”

His sprite of a sister proudly places a hand on her hip. “This, dear brother, is a record of the number of days since you last tried asking Felicity out on a date.”

“What?” A flicker of panic rushes through him. What does she know? She can’t know about the almost-kiss. Besides, that wasn’t twelve days ago. Again, not that he’s keeping track. He opts for being as evasive as possible. “And when was the last time I supposedly did this?”

“That day you bought Big Belly Burger for the entire staff as a thank you for staying late to reorganize the science section. You gave Felicity the burger with extra pickles that mysteriously ended up in the bag—even though, last I checked, she does not work here.”

She gives him that pointed look, the one she usually wears when she’s guarding a straight. They really need to have a discussion about the merits of a refined poker face. 

“That wasn’t a date, Speedy.”

“Hence the word attempt.”

Oliver shakes his head, returning his focus to the monotonous task of counting the till. Where was he again? Oh yeah, the fives. Five, ten, fifteen, twenty, twenty-five…

Once he’s got that row tallied, he finally tells Thea, “Felicity and I...we’re just friends.” The words burn his throat. Felicity might think of him as nothing more than a chum, but after that near-kiss nestled behind the dusty stacks, Oliver has ceased lying to himself about his feelings, resigned to this new, unrequited reality. 

“Sure.” He can feel her eye roll. “Friends who just happen to spend all of their free time together and buy each other beverages and have inside jokes—”

His head snaps up. “We don’t have any inside jokes.”

“Really? Then how do you explain this?” Thea holds up the cassette player tape dispenser Felicity got him as a gag gift. He still has no idea where she stumbled upon the trinket. Using her internet prowess no doubt. 

Oliver snatches it out of Thea’s hands while purposefully searching for anything in need of repair, as if to justify its very existence. “Our old tape dispenser broke.” 

“Uh-huh. And what about that little emoji keychain you bought her? The one with the glasses on it?”

Oliver shrugs. “It just...reminded me of her, that’s all. It didn’t mean anything.”

Thea is clearly ready to keep arguing, but Rene wanders over with a pastry order for one of the offices across the street. For once in his life, Oliver is grateful for Rene’s keen ability to interfere with his private conversations and begins boxing up the order. His heart does a strange flip when he recognizes the usual list. 

Unfortunately, Thea remains undeterred. “Hey, Felicity works there, right? I’m sure you could swing by for a quick visit.”

“Thea.”

“Don’t ‘Thea’ me. This is a good idea! Just tell her you were in the building and wanted to see if she’s available to go out to dinner this weekend. Easy.” 

“I work on the weekends. You know that.”

“And you could schedule yourself some time off once in a while. You are the boss. Plus, you’ve built this place so that even Rene can practically run it with his eyes closed.”

Both Rene and Oliver shoot her a look. 

“Alright, I said practically.”

Rene grunts his agreement, stuffing the to-go box to the brim with chocolate chip muffins. “You know, she’s got a point. You could think of this delivery as a trial run. You bring the order across the street, while Thea and I monitor the store. If all goes well, then you might feel comfortable enough to take a more extended break in the future.” 

“You’re just trying to spend more alone time with my sister, aren’t you?”

Rene smiles, guilty as charged. “There’s no reason why we can’t both be winners here.”

Oliver sighs. “Thea?”

Thea chuckles, crossing her arms. “Don’t worry, Ollie, I can handle him.”

Still he hesitates, running his thumb back and forth over the box, the box he’s supposed to bring to her workplace. He has so much more riding on this than a mismanaged store in his absence.

“I’ll be back in twenty minutes. Do not burn down the store while I’m gone.”

***

“Ms. Smoak?”

“One second, Curtis. This alphanumeric algorithm isn’t going to crack itself.” Huddled in front of the monitor and nibbling on the remnants of a Twizzler, Felicity has been doing the digital tango for the last hour. 

“Well, I hope you get cracking in the next ten minutes, because Coffee and Coding is about to start.” 

“We have Coffee and Coding on Wednesdays,” she dismisses without tearing her gaze from the screen. 

“It is Wednesday,” says Curtis.

Felicity darts a glance at her IT Director, who just lifts his eyebrows in confirmation. Flustered, she pushes up her glasses. “But who ordered the pastries?”

“I did,” Curtis admits. “Don’t worry, I didn’t forget to call your favorite little coffee shop around the corner. Or across the street in this case. Can you believe they still don’t have online ordering?”

A pang of disappointment flutters through her. While it’s not much, Felicity has come to treasure her little Wednesday morning ritual, an easy excuse in her routine to spend more time with Oliver. 

Still, it’s not like they don’t see each other an ample amount of time during the week anyway. Though after The Incident a few days ago, things between them have been different, more uncertain than usual. He hasn’t been avoiding her exactly; he just seems a bit...distant. Like he’s carrying a secret he doesn’t know how to share yet. Takes one to know one. The mystery has been driving her crazy. 

She’s also been racking her brain for the perfect scenario to recreate that heated moment they shared after her Humpty Dumpty debacle. But the trouble is...as soon as she hints at the depth of her feelings, she’s going to have to tell him everything. 

Hey Oliver, so you know how you assumed that I was an Executive Assistant, and I never corrected you? Well, the thing is I’m actually more like the CEO of a product-pushing conglomerate that is slowly encroaching on everything you know and love. Do you want to go out sometime?

Ugh. A stealthy flirter she is not.

So maybe today’s mishap is for the best. A chance for her to rally some gumption and figure out how to phrase her affections while still salvaging their fledgling friendship. 

The workshop will likely provide plenty of opportunity to strategize. Denise tends to drone on and on about the benefits of heapsort every time it’s her turn to talk, so the redundant lecture will afford Felicity added time to do some real romantic brainstorming. 

Sufficiently mollified, Felicity pops up out of her chair and strolls towards the conference room. 

“The food just arrived,” says Jerry as soon as she’s outside her office. 

She stumbles to a halt, blinking at her executive assistant. He says it so casually, as though her entire, perfectly orchestrated little enterprise isn’t coming crumbling down around her by one bakery blunder. 

“What? Now? Here?” She’s pretty sure she’s having a stroke. Although her ability to remain upright negates that possibility. But what good is logic at a time like this? 

Of all the truth-telling scenarios she had running through her head, this was not one of them.  

This is why she never asked for delivery! Why she personally has placed and picked up every order.

Okay, no need to panic. This is no different than any of the other work-related conflicts she has resolved in the past. Of course, those were mostly software issues, but surely the skills are transferable. She’ll just have to insist that Rene not breathe a word of this to Oliver until she has a chance to talk to him later. This afternoon, in fact. She can come up with an adequate confession by then. 

That cursory idea gets zapped the moment she turns the corner and finds the apropos man of the hour waiting in the hallway. Oh frack. 

Every blessed thought evaporates straight out of her skull. Only one person on the planet has this effect on her. 

As though it’s been days and not mere hours since she’s seen him last, hungrily her eyes feast on every part of him, from his golden-brown hair with little flecks of gray that he likes to pretend aren’t there, to those broad shoulders and sturdy arms beneath that favored blue henley. She remembers far too well what it’s like being wrapped up in those arms, all snug and safe and wonderful.

Then she starts to catalog his overall uneasy demeanor, hands stuffed into his pockets, shoulders rigid with discomfort. 

Guilt pricks her heart. He looks a little lost. 

She tries to observe her office through his eyes. Surrounded by glass walls, open and exposed. Screens scrolling with tech lingo. Not a single paper product in sight or dusty nook to duck behind. Everything is quite literally the opposite of his usual environment. And it has never been more apparent how contrary their lives are. 

All this time, she’s been invading his world and never once has he stepped into hers. Because she wouldn’t invite him. Not until she was ready. She’s driven them to this precipice. Her little lie is the grain of sand slowly corrupting the motherboard, eroding their communication from the inside out. Some friend she is. 

And yet, him braving the unknown and everything he opposes just to come and see her has to mean something, right? 

“Should we wait for you?” asks Curtis.

Felicity shakes her head, keeping her focus on Oliver. “I’m not going to make the meeting.”

“Well in that case, can I have your muffin? Because you know I’ve been working out in the mornings, and my tummy is a rumblin’—”

“Curtis!”

“Okay. Okay.”

Footsteps retreat into the conference room, until at last the door closes, encasing them in peaceful silence. 

Swallowing, Felicity hedges closer to him, the clank of her heels echoing down the long hallway. “Hi,” she says when she’s standing just a foot away from him.

“Hi.” He’s looking at her in that soft, affable way of his, making her heart short-circuit. 

She has a masters degree in cyber security, and she’s taken many a profit-hungry board member to task, so why can’t she seem to come up with a better conversation starter than ‘hi’ ?

But Oliver, her sweet friend, saves her from her own awkward web of absurdity. “So...” he begins, nodding to the wall in between the elevators. The wall covered in bold, betraying letters Smoak Technologies. 

Oh crap on a cracker. He knows. Already. Duh, Felicity, he walked into your building, you know this. The man can read. What did you expect? 

Felicity slams her eyes shut and blurts, “I can explain.”

“You don’t have to explain.”

“I know it was wrong. And I hope you know that I would never want to take advantage of your friendship, and that my lying to you has nothing to do with you and everything to do with me. I was afraid that if you knew the truth that I would lose you—”

“Felicity, hey.” Oliver’s hands, solid and steady, grip her shoulders. She has no right to draw from his comforting warmth. “You’re not going to lose me.”

She licks her lips, daring to meet his gaze again. She’s startled to find those bright blue eyes looking back at her full of sympathy, absent of judgment. “Are you sure? Because I’m pretty sure I’ve broken every cardinal rule in the friendship book.”

His face softens. “I don’t care that you lied to me. I don’t. I care...that somehow I made you feel like you had to.” He sighs, his voice deepening to a near whisper. “Why didn’t you just tell me?”

Felicity fights a wince and loses. “Because I...I kind of liked not being a CEO for a few minutes a day? It was nice. Freeing. And I didn’t know how you would react to the fact that basically my entire livelihood stands for everything you hate—”

“I never said I hated it.”

Felicity tilts her head playfully. “No, you just loathe the mere suggestion of technological advancement.”  

Oliver chuckles. “Fair enough.”

“So you’re not mad?” 

As he shakes his head, relief and elation spill through her. 

Not for the first time, Felicity is grateful that her charming literary companion is truly a good person. And not just the kind of good where he’s friendly toward impatient customers or gracious with incompetent employees—although, he is that, too. But his integrity runs so much deeper; it’s the core of who he is. Modest and generous. Forgiving to a fault. 

Oliver fundamentally embodies all that her corporate associates do not. Is it any wonder she was so drawn to him from the very beginning? 

She may have ruined her chances for anything more than friendship to develop between them, but as long as he remains in her life, she’ll be happy. She can settle for cordial camaraderie. Besides, it won’t feel like settling with him. Not really. Not completely. At least, she’ll convince herself of that sooner or later. 

Oliver withdraws his hands, leaving an alarming coolness tingling on her arms. Instantly she misses his touch. 

She watches in puzzled silence as Oliver shifts his weight, clears his throat, and suddenly evades her look. He’s nervous, she realizes. How did she not notice sooner?

Because you’ve been a little too preoccupied with yourself, Felicity, that’s how. 

“Listen, Felicity…I came by because I was in the neighborhood. But I guess I’m always in the neighborhood. You don’t need to be told that.” 

Felicity bites her bottom lip to hold back a smile. He’s awfully cute when he’s flustered.

“I know I’m just an obsolete bookstore owner, with no degree, and you…” He glances around the hallway, as though the point he’s trying to make is engraved on the walls somewhere. 

“And I what?” she prompts, a sudden burst of panic flaring in her chest, more terrified than anything that he’s never going to finish that sentence.

Oliver studies the screens for a long time, his gaze finally coming to rest back on her, and what she sees there makes her want to hold on to him and never let go. “You’re going to change the world,” he says. “You’ve already changed mine. For the better, I might add. But, I don’t know, maybe our worlds are just too different.”

“But I don’t care about the differences, and I thought you didn’t either.”

“I don’t!”

Everyone in the conference room can probably hear their conversation by now, but that is a low priority issue. All she cares about is Oliver. 

“Okay, so then what are we arguing about?”

“Felicity…you should be with someone who deserves you, someone who won’t hold you back.”

“That’s what you came up here to tell me? Oliver, what I deserve is up to me.” 

He dodges her look again, and she can feel him retreating, feel the invisible barrier he’s erected between them. 

Not one to forfeit so easily, Felicity calmly sidles up to him and lays a bold hand on his chest, right over his heart. “Please, Oliver,” she whispers. “Ask me what you really came here for. Whatever it is, I’ll say yes.”

“Promise?” 

Her inability to read his face scares her more than anything. “Promise.”

He sighs, and an anxiously long time passes before he says, “Felicity, would you like to go camping?”

She starts. “What? You want to drag me out into the woods with your sister—”

“Thea will not be there.” 

“Oh.” Nibbling on the inside of her cheek, Felicity processes this information before it dawns on her. “Oh.”

Oliver nods faintly, as though he can hear the flurry of questions her heart is suddenly screaming. 

“Are you asking me out on a date? Like an actual date? Like a date...date?”

“I mean, the implication with me standing here…” He bobs his head around, like he can’t really decide whether to confirm or deny that. She’s really put the poor guy through the ringer today. 

“Or we could go hiking,” he suggests with a shrug. 

“Hiking?”

“Yeah, there’s a great trail about an hour north of the city. My dad and I used to go there all the time. There are waterfalls and plenty of wildlife.  I should warn you, though, that it’s near impossible to send or receive phone calls in our spot.” 

He wants to take her to his special haunt? Her heart twists with bittersweet excitement. She deceives him, and he rewards her by sharing yet another coveted piece of his history. 

How can this man think he’s not worthy of her? If anything, their situation is exactly reversed. What are gadgets and gizmos compared to goodwill and grandeur? 

With more boldness than she thought herself capable of, Felicity meticulously wraps her arms around Oliver’s waist, leaning her head way back to keep eye contact with him. “Well, Mr. Queen, that sounds perfect. So...am I forgiven?” she whispers, pinching her lips together.

His own lips twitch as he follows her movements and pulls her close. “Always.” 

***

“I like you like this,” Felicity tells him, following his lead down the winding, rocky trail, her hand snuggly wrapped around his. 

“Like what?”

“I don’t know, sort of Man Versus Wild.”

He laughs, a loud, rich melody that vibrates through the core of her being. 

She’ll admit she was curious to see what side of Oliver the great outdoors would bring forth, and reality did not disappoint. Out here, away from the chaotic noise and hustle and bustle, he seems so...free. Happy. Like he’s really alive for the first time. And she feels privileged that she’s the one he chose to let so close to him.

The perks of the great outdoors have surprised her, too. Not once has she missed the ding of her cell phone. 

They stop for a break on a small cliff ridge (small according to Oliver, anyway) overlooking a waterfall and a trickling stream. The views today have been glorious. All of the views, she thinks, sneaking a peek at the man beside her. 

Though he doesn’t turn, he squeezes her hand once, and there’s a slight flicker at the corner of his lips, acknowledging that he can feel her ogling him unabashedly. She gets to do that kind of thing now, though. 

“I’m thinking of closing the bookstore,” he admits, causing her to trip over a branch in shock. His grip steadies her, and then he motions towards a large rock. Once they’re sitting beside each other, he continues. “I’ll turn the business into a full-time bakery and cafe. It’s something I probably should’ve done a long time ago. You were right.” He glances her way, wearing a reluctant half-smile. 

Reeling, all Felicity can say is, “Are you sure?”

“I’m sure. You were right about the QR codes, too.” He leans in conspiratorially. “Our weekly customer traffic is up 25%, and the sales reflect that the majority of those purchases are from the coffeeshop. Just seems like the smartest decision.”

“But Oliver, don’t you love the bookshop side of things? Helping people find their next go-to read?” 

He shrugs. “Sure. But I love staying in business more.”

Felicity doesn’t understand it, but the thought of never smelling second-hand pages or stumbling over disarrayed book stacks sends a pang of longing through her. “Well, it sounds like you’ve given this a lot of thought.”

“I have,” he confirms. 

“But will it make you happy?”

He hesitates. “It’ll give me some stability to put Thea through college. That’ll make me happy.”

He’s so selfless, it breaks her heart a little every time she beholds that soft underbelly of his gentle nature. She wonders what other secret dreams he’s sacrificed over the years to provide for his sister and his employees. And maybe even for her. If she gets her wish, she plans to return the favor and help make his tucked-away dreams come true. First she has to discover what they are.

Shuffling closer, Felicity rests her head on his shoulder. “You know, I hate to break this to you, but bakeries are just as liable to collapse as bookstores. You can never fully predict the market, even in the most stable of economies.”

“I need information about what I don’t know,” he says in her ear. 

She perks up. “What about a compromise?”

“Compromise?”

“Yeah, it’s where two parties agree on a mutually desirable outcome.”

He chuckles, the hearty sound warming her down to her toes. “I know what a compromise is, Felicity. What did you have in mind?”

“Well, you’ll be happy to hear that I have converted the entire IT department over to the ways of Verdant-roasted coffee. We could make you the official sponsor of our weekly Coffee and Coding. Think of all the free advertising that will bring.”

“I don’t want any handouts, Felicity.”

“It’s not a handout if it’s good business,” she argues, pleased to see him giving it some genuine consideration. After a long time of companionable silence and sharing a water bottle, she says, “And if all else fails, there’s always the kindle route.”

She giggles at the dismissive look he shoots her before growing serious again. “Don’t give up, Oliver. Your little bookstore...it’s changed my life. You opened up my heart to ideas and worlds that I didn’t even know were possible.”

Pulse hammering in her throat, she wonders if he catches her accidental revelation, that the depth of her urgency has far less to do with treasured paperbacks than it does her utter dependency on him. 

“A compromise. It could work.” He nods to himself. “Speaking of…” He slips his hand into his back pocket. 

“What are you doing?”

Oliver pulls out a phone. A shiny, non-retrograde phone. 

Felicity gasps. “Since when do you have a smartphone?”

“Thea got it for me after she spilt a latte on my old phone. I’m choosing to believe it was an accident.”

“That is very sensible of you.”

“We could take a photo,” he suggests.

“You mean with the front-facing camera? That, my friend, is called a Selfie.”

He scowls. “I don’t think I’m ready to say that word. Baby steps.” After an arduously humorous struggle, with Felicity patiently helping him navigate all the buttons, Oliver finally manages to snap a photo or two or twelve. 

While she’s fairly certain the majority of the photos turn out blurry, they take an unnatural amount of fun in making ridiculous faces at the camera anyway. “Okay, you have to delete that one.” She points to a photo that paints her in a particularly unattractive light. 

Oliver studies the picture fondly. “Can’t. I don’t know how.”

“Here, then let me.” 

He holds the phone out of her reach. “Oh, so you can delete all of them?”

“Not all of them, just the ones that make me look bad.”

“Felicity…” he says her name as if it explains everything. And suddenly he’s not laughing anymore, though his eyes still carry a spark of secret amusement. “Let me have this keepsake.”

Keepsake. Such an old-fashioned word from this unconventional man. If Oliver were a book, he would be just like those scuffed up, intimidating volumes he’s always trying to convince novice readers to sample. Judged for his strange and rough exterior, yet guarding a mysterious sweetness and—more than he will admit—gooey epicenter. You just have to crack the spine and ruffle a few pages to get there. 

“Felicity…” Just the way he says her name makes her feel like she could do anything so long as he’s with her. 

He leans in just enough to let her know his intent, but stops halfway, leaving the final choice to her. What a gentleman he is. And like all the great heroines, Felicity doesn’t let him do all the work. She meets his kiss eagerly, pouring out in little touches what they’re both unsure to say out loud at this early stage.

But she knows it. Deep down in her bones, she knows she loves him. And she can feel his love in the way he responds. 

What a risk she’s taken, giving her heart to the most anti-technology human on planet earth. She has a feeling the dividends will be well worth it. 

***

Tag Team: @angelalafan / @austencello / @dust2dust34 / @emeraldoliverqueen​ / @hope-for-olicity​ / @mel-loves-all​ / @memcjo​ / @releaseurinhibitions​ / @scu11y22​ / @smoakqueenz​

[diarybutablog]

Yesterday I had an amazing day!

I’m sorry I didn’t post anything since May but I really felt like I didn't had time to post anything and many things happened and I'll try to write the most important things in the other posts and now I'll try to say what happened yesterday.

The day before yesterday my father told me and my brother to got to sleep before midnight so we could wake up early. He wanted to go with us on a trip to Brighton because i wanted a comic from a Graphic Novel Shop that was there near the train station and also go somewhere to eat. Yesterday I woke up at 11 AM and he wanted to go with us on 10 AM… ALRIGHT. He opened our door to our room (i live with my younger brother in the same room in UK) and just said "So we're not going to Brighton?". To which i responded "Hello :>"… I guess he didn't like that because he just closed the doors. I waited in my room scrolling through Reddit on my laptop and seeing the same jokes reused with different images. I saw a meme where someone said the if you add Mr Bean to anything it will automatically become funny. It was so stupid that I felt weird because I wanted to chuckle for a moment when I saw this stupid picture.

Suddenly 12 AM came on a clock and I decided to dress up. After I did that I went and washed my hair. I think I was washing it for really long because I came out of the bathroom an hour later. I decided to go to the main room.

It’s not living room because it���s too small.

My dad was as always on his phone on Facebook when I came out of bathroom and I told him that I am hungry so I made myself two toasts, one with butter and pate, and the second with pepper cream. I ate them and drank some soda. My stomach hurt because I don’t usually drink sodas. Anyways, my dad told me that we could go together without my younger brother because he's asleep, so we did. My dad bought 4 tickets for us. Each one of us had one for return and one for going onward. My dad was telling me to keep the tickets somewhere like my right back pocket so i won't lose it heh. When we were riding we discussed Poland and UK as well. After the gossip about horror and thriller movies we arrived. First we went on an expedition to find the Graphic Novel Shop to buy me a comic book but so we were walking and walking and… we found it.

(Kinda i did it because my dad was totally lost)

I was broke but my dad had some to buy me a gift up to 20 pounds. I was searching around and found some cool comic books like the ones about Scott Pilgrim and based on D&D. Also i saw the 13th volume of a series called Giant Days which chapters are called troubles.

(I don't know why they call them troubles heh)

After searching for a while i noticed the comic section called LGBT and i wanted to check if something interesting was there AND THERE WAS! I really liked She-Ra and the Princesses Of Power and I noticed a book written by it’s creator Noelle Stevenson which is called The Fire Never Goes Out: A Memoir in Pictures.

It’s basically her diary but she adds her doodles and thoughts to it. I highly recommend it to anyone and I think I might do a Twitter thread describing my day but that’s not important now and probably won’t happen. I also saw a little comic book that was about tweets from our lovely Donald J. Trump but ilustrated as satirical pictures.

Basically boomer humor.

I showed it to my dad and he told me kindly that he wasn't interested in buying that for himself or for anyone. After that me and my dad came out of the store and we went to get something to eat for dinner but… my dad wanted to buy a bag and something to put a gift in. We were walking around the stores and he was stopping like every 5 SECONDS to check the next store and see if they sell something to put a gift in. We entered the Pride Shop or something like that and I wanted to buy the mug that was on the exhibition which presented Batman and Superman kissing. Also I was looking at the pride flags and pride pins but I didn’t give any signs about them to my dad because I don’t want him yet to know that I’m trans, or I think I am. When my dad was coming to these shops, I was coming with him to some of them, but if I wasn’t I was just standing outside waiting for for. In one of them there was a Moomins Handbag which I really wanted but my dad told me that he only would buy it if it costed up to 3 pounds but it was worth 8 so I didn’t get it… When I left the Moomins Handbag store I heard and saw two goth kids coming right beside me and I only heard them say that the girl in this conversation had a Moomin faze and collected everything related to Moomins… 

Does that mean that I’ll become a goth kid as well?

We were looking for a place to eat for a couple of minutes and I noticed a place where last year I saw a dude that was playing drums very nicely and it was cool to listen to him. We didn’t stay there for long because we still went to the restaurant to eat something but before we went there a random lady gave FREE COOKIE ICE CREAM to us! While I was walking I held my book without it’s cover because it’s pink and I don’t really wanna go out with pink stuff because I feel like I am showing too much of my secret side with this color. Me and my dad ate these ice creams before we went inside the restaurant but my dad got angry because instead of physical menu to pick up we had to scan the QR code but he was too much NOT FRIENDS WITH TECHNOLOGY that he just came out of the restaurant and I went after him. We were walking and found a pizzeria that we went to last year and ordered two pizzas. Before we got our pizzas we got plates filled with olives, potatoes with onions and cream, eggplant parts and some weird green vegetable.

(Probably a zucchini slices)

Also I got apple juice with 4 ice cubes in it and my dad got one beer like a dad. We were eating our pizzas peacefully and suddenly something amazing happened. A obese young adult lady with red dyed hair FUCKIN’ stole my pizza and tried to run away… and she did, but one of the stuff workers chased her and saw her coming into another pizzeria and… did the same thing, but the whole thing wasn’t only STEALING MY PIECES but also taking someones pizza slice and throwing it at them, scratching one of the stuff ladies arm and when leaving this pizzeria blocking the exit doors and not letting the stuff member that was chasing her leave the restaurant. Instead of being sad because someone took my pizza I started to laugh under my nose quietly so others wouldn’t notice. My dad only saw my smirk and asked me if I feel alright and I said „I think it’s the most entertainment I had in UK so far”. I think I kinda understand why this woman took MY piece of pizza. It was probably because me and my dad sat on the seats next to the exit so it was easier for the crazy lady to take something that was near exit than at the back of the restaurant. One of the stuff members came and told us „I’m sorry but these FUCKING… I mean stupid people will not bother you anymore”. After that she left with the rest of my pizza and gave me a new one FOR FREE! I ate the one piece and we asked the stuff to help us pack the pizza to take it outside so they gave us a pizza box to take with us. My dad before coming out of the store with me asked the Scratched Girl if everything is fine and she said that it’s just a scratch and also asked where were we from, so my dad said „We’re from Poland” and she said „Well… I’m from Russia”. I have no idea what was the rest of their conversation but my dad made a joke that the EASTERN EUROPE was being attacked. If I was good from history I would make a historical joke or a meme now, but I’m not… so not joke for today. Before we left police came to check if everything was ok, but they weren’t stopping us from leaving so we… left. On the way back we were looking at the city of Brighton and right at the train station my dad checked if he had his train ticket and… IT WAS GONE! My dad started to panic but had an idea how to fix this problem. He took his ticket receipt and tried to show it to the woman that was standing next to the ticket receiver. Surprisingly it worked and we waited for our train. When our train came my dad wasn’t sure if it was the right one so he asked me to ask the conductor if we’re in the right one and he said that we were in a right one.

TONGUE TWISTER

When we were heading back to Hastings I decided to start reading Noelle’s book. It was very touching and nice to read. When we arrived to Hastings I was on the 132nd page and I had to close it for a moment and when we came back home I needed to use a toilet and also I used this situation so I could continue reading this amazing book. I finished the entire 194 paged book in a day but everyone probably would do that. After finishing reading it I wanted to tell my friends about my day because I think it was great. After telling some of my friends how was my day I decided to eat my supper and watch with my dad the second episode of Beastars. My dad did like this episode and the whole show. We watched it because we made a small tradition while I am in UK. One day I read one chapter of one of my Warrior Cats books, and the other day we watch a singe episode of Beastars. After all of that I decided to sit and write my day down as a Tumblr Blog post.

Thank you for reading my summery of my day. 08.08 was an amazing day I probably won’t forget because of this post and maybe because I told my friends about this. As I said I'll try to post tomorrow how my other days have been because there’s so much stuff I wanna get off my chest.

[threeletterslife]

NALGCF...

DO NOT READ IF YOU HAVEN’T READ NOTHING A LIL GREEN CAN’T FIX (I MEAN, UNLESS YOU WANT SPOILERS)

「 background 」

i thought i had this idea in my drafts for longer, but apparently not. i came up with it on may 28th, 2019 at 11:26 a.m. (or so google docs tells me). i started off this story with FOUR things in mind

1. the title HAD to be nothing a lil green can’t fix  2. yn is eccentric as fuck 3. jimin and yn grow up together 4. jimin founds out yn is not real

then from may to late february, i just wrote down a whole list of crazy shit i’ve seen people do on the internet and just made yn do it LOL. someone on tiktok painted a qr code on their jacket and i was like holy shit that’s smart and made yn do something very similar!

it’s rare when i come up with the title of a fic first, but i knew that for this work, i wanted my motif to be GREEN. honestly, i didn’t have anything plotted for this fic for a LONG time. i knew that yn would be a cRaZy, i-don’t-give-a-fuck character and that jimin would be more mellow, but i didn’t know what the problem of the story would be for a while. initially, yn was going to be a figment of jimin’s imagination. he’d gone through a lot of trauma after his mother had left, so yn was sort of going to be like the ‘guardian angel’ type of spirit to him. i was THIS close to making jimin schizophrenic, but i realized how depressing the whole story would be if i made that happen... and i didn’t want another sad story

so i knew yn would then have to be REAL. but that was hard because i had no idea what the problem of the story would be. (the problem had originally been jimin finding out yn was not real lol.) i had to get inspo from my best friend to finally figure out the main obstacle in yn and jimin’s friendship: yn’s boyfriend. believe it or not, from then on i fucking FREE-STYLED. i don’t freestyle, periodt. but something about this story let me?? i think i wrote the whole story in a span of less than a week. but as i was writing, i didn’t know what was going to happen next LMAO

it was a WILD journey. (i don’t think i’ve ever, EVER free-styled a story in my life... until now, that is)

originally, i wanted the story to be a friends to lovers!au, but one of my friends told me that was kinda cliché (he didn’t know that i was writing a fanfiction lmfaoo). but my best friend told me if i ended another story where the couple separated or didn’t fall in love, she’d like neck me or something. I HAD SUCH A HUGE INTERNAL DILEMMA. i finally decided to just write and see where my words took me

i was around 17.6k words into the story when i finally knew how the story would end. it wouldn’t make sense for jimin to go through all that time away from yn and heal himself to just fALL back in love with her. that’s not character development. that’s falling back to bad habits. and it would make even LESS sense for yn to pop out of nowhere and just be like ‘omg jimin i love you too!’ so i knew the two were not going to end up together. (i also had to change the f2l!au into something else LOL.) if anyone asks (no one asks) but if anyone asks what my favorite scene to write in the whole fucking 19.2k word-fic, i’d hands down without a doubt choose the cafe scene where yn and jimin reunite after two years. i teared up a bit writing that, actually. it was like seeing my two babies coming together after dealing with so much hardship over the years

but my favorite line of the fic is the last one. i was on a writing spree on that last day (i think i wrote 3k on the spot) and that line just came to me. i thought it was a great way to end the story

「 inspiration」

this story was actually pretty heavily inspired, in the beginning, by a book by fredrik backman called my grandmother asked me to tell you she’s sorry. that book made me cry like four different times lol. i recommend if you’re into reading!

also,,, yn did a LOT of the things i’ve always wanted to do when i was younger but i was too afraid to try. i guess she’s the inner me but with a FLAIR

「 extras」

hilarious fucking fact. so, as i told y’all already, i FREE-STYLED the shit out of this story. but one of the FUNNIEST things happened:

okay, so, remember that birthday scene at the restaurant? the one where yn’s flaunting her new red marker that joon had gifted her? WELL. I NAMED THAT MARKER RM BECAUSE AND ONLY BECAUSE IT WAS JOON’S STAGE NAME. BUT AS I WAS GOING BACK AND EDITING, I REALIZED RM CAN ALSO STAND FOR RED MARKER ISN’T THAT FUCKING CRAZY I DIDN’T PLAN THAT SHIT

my friends who helped proofread the story thought i did it on purpose LMFAO

also, originally, the story title was not going to be in the story at all. i usually like it better when the title is left out of the story idk. but my brain decided it would make sense for yn to be a cafe owner and her cafe would be named nalgcf so that was that LOL

「 motifs/lessons 」

i had two important motifs in the story: the color green and the weather. not gonna lie, i was never a huge fan of green until i started writing this. green symbolizes greed, yes, cunningness, yes, but it also symbolizes growth, action and life. i wanted to make it very clear that life doesn’t turn out the way you always hope it does. there will always be slight modifications in your dreams. no dream can truly come true because there is no light without darkness; but that’s okay. you take what you get and you live with it. that is what green is to me when i wrote nalgcf. it is the color of moving on from things you should not be stuck in

the weather motif is more of a symbolization for ‘things will get better.’ no matter how hard the storm hits, how excruciatingly bright the lightning bolts are and how loud the thunder roars, clear weather will come. 

this story is about coming of age as the au suggests. you get to see both characters develop before your eyes. i guess what i’m trying to say is, there is nothing wrong with change. there is nothing wrong with being normal. there is nothing wrong with being eccentric. it’s okay not to know what you want to do in the future. it’s all right if you’re friend-zoned. nothing’s the end of the world, honestly. (unless there’s a meteor hurtling at us from space, but that’s an au for another time)

i think nalgcf holds the lesson that change is a part of life. people around you will change. you will change. the whole goddamn world will change. sometimes it’s good to just not give a flying fuck

[hoshigomi]

Kurenai-ing! a (not) review~

This is NOT a review, but it IS all my thoughts on Kurenai Yuzuru’s first concert as an OG, Kurenai-ing!! in chronological order as they happened in the show. These thoughts are:

Biased

All over the place

Unfiltered

Honest

Every single one of them is loving and positive

Without further ado!

To start off, from the day this was announced, there was absolutely No Way In Hell I was going to miss this show. They found a way to cast all my favorite OGs, somehow including Uzuki Hayate who wasn’t even ever IN Hoshigumi, (save for Airi and Kai, F, but I see Kai like every day). Today was emotionally weird and I felt off heading to the theatre but honestly, before the lights even went down, when BENIKO began her preshow speech over the intercom? Any bad thing that’s ever been in my life just MELTED away.

The evening started off with “紅 in Male Role” which was just her as you’re used her her in otokoyaku mode. The whole cast got introduced. My love, Ichijou Azusa was the first onstage which rocked. Everyone did Killer Rouge. There was something REALLY sweet about seeing like a bunch of people who Were in Killer Rouge vs. a bunch of people who Weren’t In Killer Rouge all slaying it. Watching Toshi do this number made me daydream about a universe where she was in Hoshigumi and also a universe where I’m married to her. This daydream repeated itself multiple times throughout the evening so I’m gonna denote those moments with a (**). Whenever you see (**) know I was thinking about being probably married to Uzuki Hayate. This was the only point in the show in which I was skeptical of the men being there. I don’t LIKE men, period, but I especially don’t need them in my Takarazuka- adjacent material. (They quickly changed my mind in the next bit of the show.) After the men and Beni all dipped offstage, our Lovely Flawless Incredible OGs (Ichijou Azusa, Kisaragi Ren, Uzuki Hayate, Toa Reiya, Katori Reira, and Umesaki Eve, sang Sayonara Minasama (yeah like... the song they play when people retire or when QR is closing or when they need you to Get Out Of The Theatre.) No one could hear it because everyone was busy laughing. Renta was, as expected, completely unhinged, Shiiran was fake crying, it was a disaster because honestly, I don’t know who looked at these women and was like ‘yeah let’s give them free reign of the stage what’s the worst that could happen?’ It was one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen, and then, the curtain just straight up went down as if the show ended.

Of course it DIDN’T. NEXT UP?

BENIKO! She’s back in all her long haired leopard print glory, strutting through the audience through the stage- this time waiting for her? two pieces of mancandy (Kominami Ryuhei and Tagoku Tsubasa) at her beck and call in the ??? PALACE OF VERSAILLES, I GUESS? This was, as all Beniko bits, an improv standup show with a more than a touch of drag sensibility. There was some booty shaking, some fake muscle suits on the slender men, and a lot of laughter. I had tears in my eyes and I have NEVER heard a Japanese audience make this much noise. One of the guys made Beni break when he laughed in the middle of his line, causing Beni to buckle over and snort into her water, it was just.. a treat. These men were NOT equipped to handle Beniko- but then, without practice, who is?

When this all ended, there was a BURST of flame on the screen and standing, sihouetted in backlight, was Toshi(**), looking like (**) I dunno like the worlds hottest woman rockstar (**) and if that wasn’t enough (**) then she STARTED SINGING AND YOU GUYS?

WHAT THE FUCK?

I feel like a lot of things that have happened in Takarazuka are unjust, including several Top Star Careers That Never Were, but as of tonight, the TOP OF THAT LIST is that Toshi never MADE IT. Also that like I never made it to her ochakai. There is another world out there where Toshi has been My Person since day one and I am still in her fanclub to this day. I’d be lying if I told you I wasn’t like  searching her name on Twitter as we speak trying to find out what Her OG club deal right now is, not that I need to be in ANOTHER OG club, (long story,), but GOD. Holy hell. Her voice is absolutely TOP notch and she was (**) BELTING out this introductory piece and I don’t think I breathed during the whole thing. It was HARD ROCK (**) you guys. (**) (**) (***********************************************************************************************)

From there we had a Takarazuka Medley (labeled in the program as “紅 in neutral”- sense a theme here?)

The medley featured bits from:

Lucky Star!

Gemini (Beni’s infamous girl/boy number from Etoile)

Bouquet de Takarazuka

Stuck Together from Catch Me If You Can, (featuring Renta as Kai’s part, which, oof, I can not wait for Kai to get to see.)

Estrellas

The theme song from Kamatari

Another World (just the first bars of this backing music got laughs)

Om Shanti Om

the God of Stars prologue (and you guys? I would have NEVER expected it but both me and the lady next to me just started CRYING once Beni kicked in with the 今！始まる！素敵な冒険！ bit. We shared a look and like laughed at ourselves. I did NOT see that coming but... more thoughts on Benigumi later. Just know that Dear Reader, I cried.)

Eclair Brillant

Bolero

A Piece of Courage

A song that the program cites as Quimbara which I actually didn’t recognize but (NSFW BELOW, DON’T LOOK IF YOU’RE UNDERAGE, DON’T LOOK IF YOU’RE HANKYU, DON’T LOOK IF YOU’RE GONNA SLIDE INTO MY DMS ABOUT ME NEEDING TO HONOR THE SUMIRE CODE OR WHATEVER because shut UP we all have DESIRES, MA’AM,) I spent the whole time with my eyes fucking transfixed on Shiiran out of everyone in the cast because between her time on the ground and her time idk standing and flirting and making bedroom eyes and like touching people with the tips of her fingers she was just in general doing some NASTY shit with her mouth and pulling girls around and I don’t know if she was playing aggressor or hard to get (or BOTH???? AT THE SAME TIME????) but she sure was grinding on Umesaki Eve and I guess what I’m trying to say is I could physically not breathe. I could say more about what she was getting up to but for like, frankly, my own dignity in this Starbucks I’m gonna leave that memory where it belongs.... in the confessional booth at church.

The medley ended with Beni doing a song from Mozart (but like, not the Mozart that Hoshigumi just did.)

I can not make this up but the program calls the next section of the show “紅 in the Flashy.”

This is where one of Tokyo’s special guests, Miya Rurika, pops up in the same rockstar style as Toshi(**) and I admit I actually thought she was Renta until the audience lost their shit. Guys, Miya looks BEAUTIFUL right now. Her and Beni both seem to be growing their hair out but right now Miya especially has this gorgeous blonde like wavy thing going on and really? Feminine makeup and honestly I was kind of transfixed by her. She sang her song and then was around forrrrrrr

All the Kurenai 5 material! Kurenai 5 (or 4, minus Tenju Mitsuki who is very much currently Acting In A Takarauka show) took over the next bit of the show was and it was every bit as precious as you’d hope. First of all, the way they play off each other is SURREAL and like nothing has changed between them. While I’m sure stuff HAS CHANGED, the love and the fun they have for and with each other has not. They encored some of their old songs, and you’ll be pleased to know that Tenju Mitsuki was present in cardboard cutout form, pushed around on a tiny wheeled platform by Katori Reira (who may I just add, along with Umesaki Eve, made every song they were in sound like there was a whole troupe worth of musumeyaku onstage. Girl can SING.) Beni turned to sneeze at one point and sneezed directly into Miya’s mic on accident.  They also played a video message from Mikkii. It still took a while for the cardboard cutout to stop being funny. My favorite part of this segment was when Beni cracked Renta up and kept giving her shit until she was on the floor laughing and unable to say what she had been trying to say and then Shiiran straight up took the mic out of Renta’s hands and spoke for her. さすが、Shiiran. 

The show was winding down at this point, but Beniko made a reappearance (”BENIKO in DELUSION”, according to the program). We transitioned out of that ad lib with a number for the ladies, Reira and Eve. It was boppy and jazzy and idolly and I got the idea into my head somewhere in here that Katori Reira HAS to play either Velma or Roxie in Chicago before either of us die and if I have to personally fund that happening, well, help me find my wallet because I’m off to the bank.

During this Beni changed into... not her otokoyaku clothes again but not BENIKO, just, herself, but girly. (Program calls this: 紅 in Feminine).  She does a speech about herself and what she wants out of the future and whether she wants to be called a 女優 (explicitly FEMALE actress) or not post-TKZ, and somewhere in here she had a talk with Utahiroba Jun, another man who is completely and utterly obsessed with her, and rightfully so. He was a guest but didn’t actually perform aside from with EVERYONE in one song.) Beni rounds out the concert in a beautiful dress singing her heart out and I’m truly really touched by how far she’s come and how beautifully she performs.

There were, as there tend to be, like 83746958 encores(**) and people running on and off stage. 

This was without a doubt one of the best nights of my life. I laughed until I cried, I straight up Normal Cried, I couldn’t Breathe for my like, unsumire thoughts, I was touched, and I was so so happy. Beni is my all-time favorite top star and probably always will be, and more than a singer or actress or dancer or comedian, Beni I think embodies the title of “entertainer” better than anyone I’ve ever personally had the pleasure to watch onstage or off. Watching her has made ME want to take more risks in performance and in life and to just do my best with everything life throws at me. Tonight she was so much of the Beni we all got to know and love in Takarazuka, but like, unleashed and able to be her truest, funniest, biggest, most loving self. Her ability to talk to the audience and everyone onstage and keep character and keep her humor and balance without missing a beat is unparalleled.  I really, truly love this woman, and I am so so so happy I got to see this incredible kickoff of her OG career. 

If I think of more, I’ll add it, but for now, as Beni hersef finished off the night by saying: Go your own way!!

[tuesdayscanons]

"Oh! Heya, Fessie-Bo-Bessie!" Fentonino says with an excited wave and an oblivious grin, unaware of how the hen feels about him. How could he be? He's only really seen her in passing... Until now. Chipperly approaching with an armload of flowers and chocolates, with the biggest bear— far bigger than any soul ever needs —strapped to his back, the soft duck asks, "Have you seen Maddie-kins anywhere? I have a few little gifts for her..." (*MCYEETS XD*)

{🧪}{☢} Oh, great...it's him. Fessie internally groans upon hearing the nickname, though she's accepted defeat at this point. Not like she expects him to stay around for very long anyway.

Fessie doesn't want this guy anywhere near Maddie...but driving him away won't do anyone good. It'd just make Maddie hate her and become even more obsessed with him. She'll just have to learn the hard way, as harsh as it might be. Surely Maddie would learn her lesson after she gets her heart stomped on.

"She'll be right here in a minute. That's all I'm allowed to divulge."

Just Maddie-kins? Well, Fessie should feel lucky. "Maddie-kins" was driving her bonkers with "Pookie Bear", "Honey Bunny", and the dreaded—

"SHMOOPIE!"

Damn it.

"I have some things for you too!"

They're not as extravagant as Fentonino's gifts, though they come from the heart...and hours upon hours of sewing, but mostly the heart.

Maddie is holding a satchel (which is a gift itself), containing smaller gifts inside. There are pockets containing his favorite snacks, a pouch which would fit his calculator perfectly (she checked the measurements three times to make sure it was the right size), and a sappy love note with a QR code that links to a playlist of songs which reminded her of him.

Though Fessie might be reading too deeply into this, she can't help but compare the lovebirds' gifts to one another. Maddie's gifts were tailored specifically for Fentonino. Not only that, but she made those gifts with her own hands. Fentonino's gifts, however, appear to be thoughtless and superficial things he just bought from the store. It's not as though Maddie wouldn't enjoy those gifts, but so would any other girl. Does Fentonino really not know anything about his own girlfriend? Or is Maddie so devoid of her own identity that he seriously thinks those gifts were the best things he could give her?

"You're such a sweetheart, snuggle-buggle~" Maddie steps on the tips of her toes to give Fentonino a peck on the cheek, "Thank you so much!"

Snuggle-buggle? How many sappy nicknames does Maddie have for him? Fessie would honestly rather not know...she's already ready to gag at the nicknames she has heard. Goodness knows how horribly cheesy the other nicknames must be...

Despite feeling like a third wheel, Fessie decides to stay anyway no matter how much it wears at her sanity. Maddie shouldn't be left alone with someone who has so much power over her.

Why wouldn't Fentonino use that to his advantage? {☢}{🧪}