#dont mind me sobbing screaming like a dying animal

[arthursfuckinghat]

[ninja-knox-ur-sox-off]

OKAY WOW THAT WAS AS TRIP SES 3 EP 4 REACTION TIME HECK BCUKLE U P

[Monkie Kid season 3 ep 4 spoilers under cut]

OH 

OH I PULLED UP THE EP AND ADRENILINE KICKED IN HGBSDLKFM;AOWEF 

SCREAMS

OKAY, SO THESE EPS

I’M GETTING THAT “AA I’M NOT READY” FEELING AGAIN HELPGBFJBAAWFMA;WEO

DANCES DANCES BREAKDANCES

i can’t actually breakdance

or dance…

MOVING ON BG;LKDSMNFAOWE 

*stares at the title* 

OH HAHA THIS IS A MACAQUE EPISODE ISN’T IT

AAAHAHAHAH I’M GONNA PERISH, I’M GONNA PERISH SO BAD BGAKDSMFOAWEF 

CONCERN 

INHALES

OKAY

PLAYED PART OF THE INTRO TO TEST THE SOUND AND I’M ON THE FLOOR ALREADY 

THE THEME SONG MAKES ME SO FREAKING HAPPYYYYYBGFL;MF;AOIGMAWEF WAILS 

SOBS CRYING BGSDFM;IOAFWAEF

FALLS ON THE FLOOR SOBS AND FLIPS TABLES 

OKAY I’M FINE HERE WE GO CLEARLY MAC EP PROBABLY HERE WE 

SCREAMS

SAND

HECKINGBGDSFKMAOEW

MAC EP

MAC EP 

MAC EP

AIGHT LETS SEE HOW STUPID YOU REALLY ARE MY GUY I’M READY BRING IT

I’M SO FREAKING NOT READY HELGNGFOIHAGA;WOE

THE SIGH 

JUST 

“ugh…” 

GBSDFMA;OGHAWE

 ALSO MY GOSH THIS 

THIS ANIMATION

BGAS;DLKFM;OAWE

MAC, IN THE MIDDLE OF THE DESERT

MAN DOESN’T KNOW WHERE HIS FUEL GAUGE IS AND CRASHES GBSL;DKFMAWEOF 

OH HOHOHOHOHOHOHO COMPASS THINGIEEEE

THAT FACE

THAT EXPRESSION

OH FLASHBACKKKK OHHHHHHH

SCREAMS 

SCREAMING

IM 

I DONT EVEN AHVE ANY THOUGHTS I’M JUST ONE BGI LONG SCREAM RN 

THE SURPRISE ON HIS FACE

AND THE

THAT MANS AFRAID RIGHT THERE

“You’ve been busy” DUDES ALREADY TRYING TO TALK AND HE’S ALREADY DOOMED 

Wowa

HELLO

HAIR

BG;SDLKMFOAGHA;OIWEGAMEWF 

SHE’S GROWN IT OUT BG;SDNM;SOHGWEA WHEEZING 

NICE STYLISH 

NOW JUST  RELEASE THE CHILD FOR GOODNESS SAKE BGSD;FM;OAWEF 

I NEED LIKE, FOUR HUNDRED YEARS TO PROCESS THIS

“UR OATH” AYO MACKY BOY WHAT DID YOU DO 

OH I’VE NEVER BEEN ACTIVELY CONCERNED FOR THIS IDIOT BEFORE BUT I AM FEAR.PNG SCREAMS 

HE LOOKS SO SCARED IN EVERY FRAME OH MY HECK HECK HECKE HCKEHGKMDFOAIWEF

M,ANS DEAD

MANS DEAD

MACAQUE DEAD AND BROGHT BACK REAL 

OH MY 

HI

OKAY

I AM NOT READY FOR THIS NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT 

OKAY

SHE’S TERRIFYING 

I’M FEAR.PNG

WHAT WHAT EHGBSFMAWE

SCREAMING

I’VE HAD THIS PAUSED FOR FIVE MINUTES I’M STILL PROCESSING THE FACT THAT LBD BROUGHT MAC BACK FROM THE DEAD???????

WOOOOOOOOOOO

I’M 

GONNA DIE THIS EP

THIS IS IT

DEAR GOSH 

I’M JUST

HHAAHA

SITTING HERE

A H  

LAYS DOWN 

H

HI FLASHBACKS IN A FLASHBACK *WHEEZING* 

BUT UH

HAHA

HAHAHAH

THE BLUE CHAINS???? 

AND IT LOOKS LIKE MAC’S OWN SHADOWS ARE TURNING AGAINST HIM AND BINDING HIM HELLO/??? 

WHAT DO I EVEN SAY TO THIS HELPBG;SDMF;AOWG;OAWUIEFM 

HE LOOKS LIKE HE’S  GETTING CONSUEMD BY HIS OWN SHADOWS ????? HELLO????????? 

WOW

THIS IS A LOT TO UNPACK MY GOSH

THE HTING IS THO IS THAT BOTH MAC AND LBD ARE UNRELIABLE NARRATORS SO I DONT’ KNOW HOW MUCH OF THIS I CAN TRUST BUT MY GOSH HECK MAN 

Mac being like “nah” and just straight up leaving is jBGAKWME;FAWOEF

okay

OKAY

HAHAHAHAHHA

SORRY IT LOOKS

K

SO LIKE

MEMORY ALTERING?? HALF POSESSON?? FORCED FLASHBACKS??? MAKING HERSELF SEEEM LIKE A GOSH DANG ANGEL IN THE FLASHBACK IN HIS MIND?? 

OHHHHH BOYYYY OH BOYYYY WE’RE NOT OKAY 

MAC ACTING UNAFFECTED WHILE HE’S FREAKING TERRIFIED IS GBSD;FMAWOE 

BGKLDFMWE LOOKS LIKE MAC TOOK HALF THE ANIMATION BUDGET ALONE NGL 

I’M GRASPING AT HUMOUR STARWS RN LET ME BE 

WOW

OKAY 

CHAINS

HI 

THE WAY THE SYMBOL ORIGINATED UNDER HIM HAHHAHAHA 

HAHA

OH BOY

OHHHHH BOYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

YEAH SO THIS EXPLAINS

WHY HE LOOKS 

THE WAY HE DOES

EP 1

HAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA

MAN

I’M DYING

WE’RE

HECK

HECK

EHCK

HECKGB;SDAKJFNAGWE

I’M BRAIN NOT HI

ACK 

OKAY WE’RE GOOD FINE

“CHAMPION”

HAHAHAHHAHA

OHHHH BOYYY

MANS JUST LOOKS EXHAUSTED NOW

HE’S STUPID AND NEEDS HECKING HELP 

WOW MAKES SENSE WHY HE’S “SIDING” WITH HER NOW HAHAHAHAHHAHAHA

I PAUSED IT TO LOOK AT PIGSY AND TANG AND I TOOK TO LONG AND IT PUASED ON WUKONG AND I JUST YELLED “IT’S HIM” GBSAD;KFMNA;WOEIDFMAWEF I HAVE SUCH BRAINROT FOR THIS STUPDI MONKEY I LOVE HIM GBSD;FAGMOWE

TANG HE’S BEEN GLOWING THE WHOEL TIME WHAT DO YOU MEEAAANN 

I love Pigsy So much BGAKL;WMFE;OWEF 

TANG SCOLDING PIGSY BGSDALFMA;WEO

If they didn’t have pigs they’d never get anywhere BGSAKLWMWE

HE’S THE DRIVE THE “LETS KEEP GOING” HURRY UP KGNSAD;LFMAWOEF

MEI IS THAT MEME 

“IF I HAD THIS GUY I’D HYPE HIM UP SO MUCH, I’D WALK INTO A ROOM AND ANNOUNCE HIM AND IF YOU DON’T CLAP I’LL BLOW UP THIS BUILDING” OR WHATEVER IT IS GBASKFMAWE 

WHAT ARE THEYGBSDJL;FKMA;WOE RTYING TO ACCOMPLISH U CAN’T JUST HRRGGHHHH UNTIL U DBG;LSAJKVBOER HELPOGFAWEF

YEAH OF COURSE YUP GBASLKFM;AWEF 

CRYING OVER HOW SUPPORTIVE THEY ARE BGDS;JF;AWME ;A; 

Kay so last episode was “I know my powers will come back when my friends are in danger” and now he’s “how do i know it’s gonna work” 

feels contradictory and a little neyh writing :T 

TEH GOLD VISION IS THE BABY PIOWERBGDSKFM;AWEF

I’M NOT EVEN AS GOOD AS A BABYGBSDFAMOWEGFIGAW PLEASE MK BOI LAD MY GUY HELPBGSDLKMA;OIGEW

MEI AND SANDYGBFMA;OGHA;WEF

Mk i just v upset at himself :( 

Interesting how Monkey King’s insecurities in his powers result in not saying anything and trying to fix it on his own, brushing off concerns, while Mk’s manifests in anger at himself 

MAN ANYWAY 

WAIT I HAD TO GO BACK AND 

“WHAT USE AM I” 

MK

BUDDY

SHAKES HIM

U DON’T NEED TO BE USEFUL THAT’S WHY MONKEY KING IS RE-CHARGING BECAUSE YOU DON’T HAVE TO YOU DON’T NEED TO BE USEFUL TO BE IMPORTANT N

Okay so i get he just wants to help but my guy please PLEASE BG;SDAFMOAWEF 

 THE WAY MEI PRONOUNCED SAMADHI 

BGASKLDMFAWOE CRYINGBFALM;OEFIWE

“TANG DON’T JUST YELL, I CAN DO THAT” 

HE IS A PARENT I’M WHEEZINGBDSF;LAM;WEF

UH

NO

NO THEY DIDN’T 

MK DON’T GET IN THE CAR WITH MACAQUE

IT’S MACAQUE

MK DON’T GET IN THE CAR I SWEAR IT’S NOT 

HE’S TRYING SO HARD THEY REALLY NEED TO LIKE, HOLD HIS HAND AT ALL TIMES SO HE DOESN’T GET LOST I SWEAR, PUCNHES MACAQUE IN THE FACE 

HOW DID THEY NOT NOTICE MK DIDN’T GET IN THE VAN WITH THEM

PIGSY STOP TALKING UR SON IS MISSING 

I’M SUCH CONCERN

IS MEI WITH HIM?? 

WAS THAT AT LESAT MEI??? I’M SO CONCERNED 

FOR REALS IT’S SO OBV MAC IT’S SO SHADOWY IN THERE MEI KILL HIM 

“I feel like i’m talking to myself here” HTAT’S CAUSE YOU ARE, PIGSY PLEASE ;A; 

AT LEAST THEY HAVE EACH OTHER

Mei calling Pigsy Piggy actually means everything to me ;-; 

YOU GETTING IT MK

OH THANK HEAVENS SANDY’S WITH THEM TOO

OKAY SO AT LEAST THOSE THREE HAVE SANDY I’M GLAD YAY GOOD 

love how macaques first move is always to separate them first

kicks him in the knee 

YEEEAHAHHH MK GOT IT

HE’S SO FREAKING SMART

NOOOOOOOO

SUCH CONCERN

YEAH PIGSY NOTICE 

SCREAMS

WUKONG WAKE UP U STUPID MONKEY UR SON’S IN TROUBLE 

OH THAT WAS BEAUTIFULLY DONE 

THE CHANGE THERE THE SEPERATION BETWEEN THE TWO VANS

AND THE WAY THEY’RE DRIVING INTO THE DARKNESS WHILE THE OTHERS ARE DRIVING TOWARDS TEH SUN IS ACTUALLY SO FREAKING GOOD ACTUALLY HOT DANG WRITING GO BRRR

YOU DON’T SAY, MEI 

UYEAH GET IT 

AHAHAHAH NOOOOO

OH I SWEAR IF MAC SEPERATES MK FROM THEM I’M GONNA BREAK MORE THAN HIS FACE BGSLK;FMAWOEF 

LOOK AND MACAQUE CHANNELING HIS INNER LBD GLITCHY VIBES 

BGA;SLKMFA;OWE

MAN THO THE ANIMATION 

IT’S FUNNY HOW CLEAR PEOPLE LOVE MAC AS A CHARACTER 

HOW WELL THEY ANIMATE HIM SAYS IT ALL GBSDKFMAOWEF 

MACAQUE: how could I possibly lure sandy away

Macaque: got it 

macaque: MEOW

CANON

I CAN’T BEELIVE THIS BGSAKDFMA;OWEF

NO BUT THE VISUAL OF MACAQUE PUTTING A WALL BETWEEN MK AND MEI TRYING TO SEPERATE THEM IS UH 

YEAH 

THINKS ABOTU HOW HARD HE SELF PROJECTS ONTO THOSE TWO 

HHAHAHAHA

KILL

TOUCH MK AND U DIE MAC

I DON’T CARE UR TRUAMATISED I’LL DROP KCIK U INTO THE SUN 

MAN

KILL HIM 

SMACKS MACAQUE WITH A PILLOW

FILLED WITH BRICKS

HE’LL BE FINE

THE WAY HE JUST PASSED RIGHT THROUGH HIM AND MK LOOKED SO PANICKED

MAN

PUNCHES HIM IN THE FACE 

PUNCH HIM

IN THE FACE

NOOO

W O W 

Y’know, despite the fact he’s doing this, like Mac is so freaking stressed, he’s like

W O W 

Wukong in ep 1: do i have to spell everything out?

Mac in ep 4: do I have to explain EVERYTHING? 

THEY’RE STUPID AND THE SAME, AND ITS JUST KICKS HIM IN THE HEAD

BRUH DUDE UR THE WORRRSSSTTTTTT 

So like, one down and one to go, so good news is he has to come back for Wukong so BGAKWMOEF 

 YEAH THAT’S RIGHT PIGSY, U KNOW SOMETHINGS WRONG GO GET UR KID 

HELLO SCORPION DEMONNNNN

HELLOOOO

OHHH BOIII

IS THIS WHERE THEY SNAP HIM OUT OF HIS MEDITATION AND SOMETHING HAPPENS

I’M HHHHHAAAAA

AAAAAAAA

SCREAMING 

OKAY KILLS MACAQUE 

I DON’T BG;KLSAFMAOWE AAAAA

The way Mk looks whenever Macaque is around H

He just, he knows what he’s doing and knows Macaque’s manipulations by now, so he’s just angry at him. HE’S NOT EVEN SCARED AT THIS POINT HE’S JUST MAD 

GOSH 

KILL HIM

HOW DARE YOU THREATEN SANDY I’M GONNA BODYSLAM YOU INTO THE SUN 

HOW DARE

GET HIM

GET EM 

“BABY POWERS”

YOU’RE SO STUPID, YOU EVESDROPPED DIDN’T YOU 

KICKS HIM IN THE LEG 

GET HIM MK

BEAT HIM  UP 

OKAY BUT THAT WAS REALLY INTERESTING. HE CAN SEE THE SHADOWS, THE LIGHT, THAT HE USES, THE GOLDEN VISION AND ALL THE SUDDEN THE SHADOWS ARE SMALLER

LIEK THE GOLD VISION LITERALLY WEAKENED MACAQUE JUST BY ACTUALLY LOOKING AT HIM

hoooOOOO BOY THE 

CAUSE MACAQUE’S STRENGHT COMES FROM HIS LIES AND DECEPTION AND SHADOWS

TAKE THAT AWAY, AND HE’S BARELY ANTYING

WOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOOWOW

WOW

MK

LOOK HOW MUCH HE’S PROGRESSED AND GROWN UP

Instead of yelling and fighting, he just holds Macaque there and asks and tries to understand and acts like this is just a normal conversation, eh’s not even trying to fight him he’s just asking 

MAN 

HE’S SO EARNEST TOO

MK MEANS EVERYTHING TO ME HE’S TRYNG SO VERY HARD TO BE KIND AND UNDERSTANDING (looks at SQ) mAN 

“i’ve had a taste of dying, and not a big fan SO” KAY WOW AIGHT COME RIGHT OUT AND SAY IT DEAD BOY BGSDKLMF;AOWEF 

When he’s with his friends he seems actually like afraid of macaque but he’s literally fighting him without powers rn and he doesn’t seem afraid of him at ALL 

man

MAN

okay just, I find how Mk treats him very interesting 

mK IS WAY TOO GOOD FOR MACAQUE I’M JUST SAYING LIKE HE’S SO PATIENT AND KIND NO MATTER HOW MANY TIMES HE BEATS HIM THE HECK UP, MAN ABUSES THIS KID AND HE JUST CONSTANTLY TRYING TO GET HIM TO OPEN UP AND BE KIND TO HIM M A N 

MAN 

THIS EP

EHCK

“if you can’t beat me, you can’t beat her” THAT WHOLE

HE’S RIGHT 

LIKE, SEH’S SO MUCH MORE PWOERFUL THAN HIM AND HE KNOWS IT

AAAAA

I’M HAVING WAY TOO MANY THOUGHTS RN 

“I’ll repay my debt and be free of this nightmare” HE SAYS IT SO CAUSUALLY BUT MY GUY MY GOSH THE HECK GBSDKLFMA;WOEIFM 

I’D SAY SOMEBODY HELP HIM BUT MK’S ALREADY TRYING TO HECK 

GET EM

YES

MEI

GET HIM

CAUSE MK WON’T PUNCH HIM HE WONT’ DO IT

MEI WILL

FRICK YEAH 

GET EMMMMM

JHAHHAHAHAHHHAHHAHA

YOU DON’T GET TO TOUCH M’BOY

GET EM MEI 

BEAT HIM UP 

YEEEAAHHHHHHH

YEEEEAAAHHHHHHHHHH

GET EM MEI 

OHHHHHHHH

THAT HURT HIM

Y’DON’T SAY

THE WAY MK THINKS MEI IS THE ABSOLUTE COOLEST 

I’M HOLDING THEM SO GENTLY

THEY HYPE UP EACH OTHER SO MUCH I LOVE THEM 

YEAAAAHHH

GET EM MEI

BEAT THE CRAP OUTTA HIM

SHE’S PROBABLY GONNA LOSE BUT GET ONE HIT IN AND I’LL BE SO HAPPY 

MEI IS SO FREAKING GOOD I APPRECIATE HER SO MUCH 

THE FACT MEI PICKED THAT UP JUST BY WATCHING HER UNCLE DO THAT IS AMAZING 

Mei: *shows up* 

Macaque: I n t e r e s t i n g 

AKA: I have no idea what to do in this situation so i’m making myself seem like i just find it neat 

THAT IS SUPER GROSS, GET HIM 

I’M LAUGHING 

AT HIM

SO HARD

LETS GET SOME ARMOUURRRRRR

HE’S SO STUPID

HE’S SO DRAMATIC

I KNOW IT’S JUST FOR THE SETS BUT I’M WHEEZING BGD;SLKFMN;GH;OAIWMF 

CAN WE PUNC HIM

CAN WE PLEASE? 

ALSO AWOOGA THAT FRAME WHEN WE SEE HIM INSIDE THE MECH HI 

HI 

HIS MECH HAS SIX EEEARRRRSSSSSS

SANDYYYYYY

;A; 

I’M HOLDING HIM SO FREAKING GENTLYYYYYYYYYYY

HAHA U FOOL YOU THINK U CAN STAND AGAINST SANDY??????

HA 

GET HIM MEI

HE DARED TOUCH SANDY BEAT HIM UP 

WOOWWWW THAT LIKE, LAZERD HIM DIRECTLY AND NOTHING HAPPENED

WOOWWWWW

IT HURT HIM BEFORE THO?? 

THINKING HARD ABOTU THAT 

WOWWWW

W O W 

THE LBD FRAME

MK’S THE SAME

H

I’M FINE

That’s Mk’s “something bad is happening to my friends and i can’t do anything about it” face

wonder if 

backstory H

JUST THINKING IGNORE ME MOVING ON 

BRUH

OF COURSE THEY DID THE “TAKE ME, JUST LEAVE THEM ALONE” OF COURSE THEY DID 

MAC JUST LOOKS KINDA ALL OVER THE PLACE HE’S NOT DOING WELL, AND I STILL WANNA PUNT HIM INTO THE SUN FOR DOING THIS TO MK 

MACAQUE SELF PROJECTING ONTO MK

GLOATING OVER THE FACT THAT HE’S IN CONTROL OF THE SITUATION AND MK IS NOTHING

CAUSE HEY, HE’S IN MK’S PLACE IN REGARDS TO LBD

HE IS NOTHING, AND LBD IS IN CONTROL 

HE’S LIKE, CLASSIC BULLY PROJECTING ISSUES ONTO SOMEONE WEAKER THAN HIM I’M

HE’S THE WORST Y’ALLS 

THAT QUIET “I said.” 

h

ACTUALLY NOT OVER HOW MAC JUST SLAMMED MEI’S DRAGON INTO THE SAND

GET EM MK 

LOOK HOW PRETTY BIRD HE IS 

GET HIM

HOW’D HE KNOW TO GO FOR THE EYE?? 

HOW’D THAT EFFECT MAC?? 

HECK

YEAH GOT HIM 

WOW MK’S POWERFUL 

WOW THE WAY HE

CLUTCHED HIS EYE AND LAUGHED HYSTERICALLY 

MANS’ GOT EYE TRUAMA FOR ONE 

UH

WOW THIS IS A LOT THIS EP HOLY CRAP THERE’S SO MUCH TO FREAKING UNPACK I’M REELING 

Interesting really is Macaque’s favourite word this season GAL;KF;AWE HE’S SO SUTPID I’M GONNA FISTFIGHT HIM INTO THE SUN

THE TRANSFORMATIONS 

SCREAMING SO LOUDLY 

THAT WAS A LOT 

THAT WAS SO MUCH

WOW

WOW

IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR AND A HALF TO WATCH THIS AND I STILL FEEL THE NEED TO GO THROUGH IT AGAIN BECAUSE WOW

WOW THAT EYE THING THO

I’M ON THE FLOOR

HOLY CRAP

I’M DEAD

MK KNOWING TO GO FOR THE EYE THO 

I’M NOT OVER THAT 

HE KNOWS THAT’S A SPOT THAT HURTS HIM AND WENT FOR IT 

H

I’M WOW

WOW

SO SAD WE COULDN’T SEE MEI REALLY BEAT UP MACAQUE BUT

WOW

THE WAY MK TREATS MACAQUE AND LIKE

SEEMS SAD WHEN HE GOES FOR THE OTHER OPTION RATHER THAN LETTING HIM HELP HIM

N

HHGGBBD;FMAOEW 

SCREAMS

I NEED TO LIKE LAY DOWN AFTER THIS EP GOOD GOSH 

LAYS DOWN

SCREAMS

ROLLS AWAY

OKAY WOW YEAH

GONNA

THIS REALLY TOOK EIGHT YEARS OF MY LIFE, CRUMPLED IT UP INTO A BALL AND HANDED IT BACK TO ME BGDSLKFMA;OGH;OIAWEMF

WOWOWOWOWOOWOWOWOOWOW

OKAY I’M FINE

IM JUST

WOW

THIS IS GONNA TAKE ME A WHILE TO GET OVER HAHAHAHHAHAHAHA

GODSPEED GOOD DAY I’MA GO HAVE A CRISIS NOW FARWELL 

[almondmilks-posts]

C!schlatt- executed

I got lots of DMs asking for more angst so here

* You and schlatt get into an argument about him being president and executing tubbo ect, in a drunken rage he stabs you.

*Woah this is the longest thing I've ever written.

It all started when Fundy tipped you off about schlatts plans of executing tubbo for helping Wilbur and Tommy out,which you knew about ofc. You treated tubbo like one of your own and even sometimes helped him sneak out the Whitehouse without schlatt knowing; but killing tubbo over that broke you. You had to say something to hopefully put a stop to your husband's madness and his drinking. God did you hate how much he drunk, it drove you nuts.

You- he's just a boy. (Get the reference...)

Schlatt- I. Don't.give a fuck. He's. Traitor

You- do you blame him schlatt? Him and Tommy are close brothers even he probably felt terrible about what happend you know when you-

Schlatt- oh well should of thought I'd that before helping that that CHILD. HE'S MY RIGHT HAND MAN HE HAD ALL THE POWER AMD NOW and now he's going to pay the price and it's an expensive price to pay.

You walked over to the window and stood looking out into manburg. Just thinking about how you can save the poor boys life. How  could warn him without schlatt finding out? you came to nothing. You and schlatt were married you were first lady, wherever you went he went. You were in a deep thought about tubbo and what his death would mean to the server when quackity quietly Knocked on the dark oak door.

Quackity- uh boss I hate to interrupt but you have a meeting in 20 minutes down at the twitch prime church.

Schlatt sighed. Stood up off his chair and walked over to you, but not before grabbing the bottle. Schlatt got super close to your face, so close you could see the little wrinkles that had developed around his eyes and forehead since becoming president, your nose scrunched under the smell of alcohol from his breath or from his clothes you honestly couldn't tell anymore.

Schlatt- we will no longer speak on the matter. I AM THE PRESIDENT FOR MANBURG WHAT I SAY GOES.

He slaunted away from you pushing past quackity. Quackity gave you a sad smile as you both knew how mean schlatt could get when he drank, and recently he had been drinking alot. Quackity turned towards the open door to make sure schlatt was outta ear distance.

Quackity- go.

You- huh?

Quackity- I told Phill that you would be seeing him thecno Wilbur and Tubbo in the bunker. Go warn them.

You- i- hhhh thank you quackity I love you so much man.

Quackity- I know I know. Hurry because it looks like we are going to be in for along night if schlatt messes up this meeting

You- he's so drunk he can't even walk straight of course he's going to ok I'll run along I'll take the horse to speed things up.

Quackity quickly shut the door before running to where schlatt would be waiting downstairs for the meeting while you grabbed your axe and saddle. You made your way out the escape hatch in your office and found your horse (name your horse here pls comment the names I wanna see what y'all name your animals)

Horse- neyyyy

You- heyyyy boy shhh it's just me ok ok steady ok I'm getting on 3...2...1... And uppp fewww ok not so bad is it (horse name) ok off to warn Tubbo.

Your horse stamped it's hooves and took off for the bunker. You had ridden this path hundreds of time so it was easy for you and the horse to get to, quackity said he already told Phill about your arrival do he should be waiting for you to turn up. You were right because Wilbur was waiting outside for you to arrive. His usual green jacket and black Beanie on his head.

Wilbur- hey y/n in here look you can rest (horse name) in here Niki built it.

You- Niki joined? Awesome o haven't seen her in so long, well since she messed up the soup and schlatt fired her

Wilbur- how is he by the way y/n? Come inside and we can talk about him later or should I say rant

You- true true.

You walked through the entrance carefully, you had fallen down the rails the first few times Wilbur took you here. Over his presidential campaign you and wilbur had actually been pretty close and luckily kept in contact even though schlatt won. SBI was a group you practically grew up with just not enough for Phill to adopt you, but you don't blame him, you wouldn't fit the dynamic plus your parents didn't really like the idea but they never really liked anything you did.

Phill- oh hey y/n were all down here what do you want to talk about quackity said it was urgent so I called a meeting.

You got to the bottom of the steps to find everyone waiting on the floor for you to arrive. By everyone I mean: Phill, Tubbo, Tommy, Niki, thecno. You waved at Niki who had changed her hair colour since you saw her last she waved back with a huge smile on her face but a hint of sadness in your eyes. You had changed so much, you just look exhausted which was not wrong.

You- oh um yes hi everyone, sorry to be so blunt but uhhh there is no better way to say this. Tubbo is in grave danger. Schlatt is planning to...

Your hands started to shake vigorously, you felt dizzy, you wanted to throw up. Almost as if your body is warning you about doing this right now it's screaming at you to not betray your husband of four years like this but you have to.

Tommy- planning what y/n spit it out?

Niki- hey, y/n it's ok shhh Tommy what schlatt planning in doing to Tubbo?

You- he's PLANNING TO EXECUTE you tubbo. He knows, I don't know why or how but he knows about all of this and your his right hand man he's going to kill you tubbo, hang you for tertiary. I'm so sorry I-

Tommy- Tubbo? No? You can't die not now

Thecno- all our plans. Just gone.

Phill- he can't hang tubbo he's just a boy.

At this point you were sobbing now. Full on ugly crying. Your heart physically hurt from all the angst and the possibility of Tubbo dying. Your knees gave out on the floor as you wept for the young boy and he was still alive. The others argued in the back as to what to do. Tommy grabbed Tubbo and hugged him, Wilbur was crying over the threat of danger even thecno was a little on edge.

You- I'm sorry. But I must go I can't I can't stay im sorry.

Phill- it's ok. Thank you for warning us sport.

With that you climbed the stairs thinking about nothing honestly. You were numb. Your husband was going to murder someone you looked as your brother for years what did this mean for you? You were also helping them did he know about that? How did he know about tubbo's tretariy? You got on the back of your horse and rode back to manburg.

Climbing up the shoot to your office was miserable. You felt miserable, confused and alone. You had no idea how long you were sat in your chair looking at the chipped desk until the door was slammed open hitting the wall with a lud bang. You didn't need to look up to know it was your husband. Even before marriage he always slammed doors open like they were nothing.

Schlatt- what's got you all down in the dumps? HM sweetheart?

You- you know what and don't call me that.

You crossed your arms still refusing to make eye contact with the ram hybrid. This really pissed him off. He however pissed you off more by calling you sweetheart which to some would seem sweet but you knew schlatt better. This time was dripping in sarcasm because he was mind fucked drunk by now not caring about anyone or anything. Schlatt waddled up to your desk and stood right on front of you, still not looking up at him you pulled out some paperwork and started to mindlessly sign it.

Schlatt- me YOUR PRESIDENT just signed a huge deal with badboyhalo.what is wrong with you recently huh? Cats got your tounge ok what about pig hybrid got your tounge? Or angel of death got  your tounge or exhild child got your tounge?

You froze. He did know.

Schlatt- AHH struck a nerve, don't stop signing MY papers dear you are my wife after all.

You- no. Fuck you schlatt you can't hang the poor boy he's so young and innocent what was he supposed to do? You know I have to sign paperwork before you do anything and I won't sign off on it.

You threw your pen at schlatt in a rage. You didn't see if it hit him to enraged to care, papers were ripped, you there everything off your desk onto the floor. Schlatt just stood there blank expression not saying anything to you.

You- fuck you schlatt you don't control me.

You picked up the photo of you and schlatt on your wedding day. You ponderd on it for a second before stomping up to schlatt and shoving the picture on his face.

You- look at it. LOOK AT US LOOK HOW HAPPY I WAS NOW LOOK AT ME? DO I LOOK HAPPY TO YOU? OR DO I LOOK EXHAUSTED? STRESSED? because I am all of them things being married to you schlatt you are a terrible president and you have no power you're a pussy and won't face your problems like a real man.

Schlatt picked up the bottle of vodka and downed the whole lot you just stood there absolutely raging over this man's attitude and willingness to just disregard everyone in his life.

Schlatt- I DONT CARE HOW YOI FEEL I DONT CARW ABOUT ANYONE NOT EVEN QUACKITY OR MY WIFE. I AM THE BEST PRESIDENT MANBURG HAD EVER SEEN AND YOU WILL OBAY THE RULE OF SCHLATT. I KNOW YOU HAVE BEEN HELPING THE FUCKERS AND YOU WILL SUFFER JUST LIKE TUBBO, JUST LIKE TOMMY, JUST LIKE DREAM YOU WILL PAY THE PRICE FOR YOUR CRIMES. AGAINST. YOUR COUNTRY. AGAINST. YOUR PRESIDENT.

With every word schlatt got closer and closer to you. Terrified of schlatt, becoming increasingly more angry to the point his horns have grown pitch black out of pure hatred. You moved back as far as you could against the glass in your office. Schlatt pressing you up against it with his body but this time shoving a finger in your face and still yelling about how incompetent you are as a wife and as a person.

Suddenly you felt a stabbing pain just above your heart. You look down to see a black colour sword through your chest and red blood gushing out onto your clothes and floor ( ok the sword is still in so in irl not a lot of blood would actually escape unless the object was removed top tip but for theatrics blood eveywhere) you weakly reach up to grasp the blood covers wrist of schlatt to pull the sword out but to no avail as you suddenly feel super dizzy and everything goes black.

Quackity- she's.... She's.....y/n's dead

Quackity heard you and schlatt yelling in his office when silence happend. He knew this was a bad sign and anxiously walked to schlatts office with shaky hand. He got close enough to hear a loud thud and XP drop on the ground. He ran back to his office to think when schlatt walked by ( in this his office is made.of glass) staring at his hands, suit all covered in blood. His heart dropped and ran back to the office to collect your stuff, running on adrenaline he ran all the way the he bunker to tell the others. No time for him to cry yet he was still in shock over what just happened.

Niki- no no no no pls say your lying pleas no no not y/n

Niki dropped to her knees sobbing and rocking backwads and forwards much like you did less than three hours ago when you came to warn the crew. You were her friend and was the only person who helped her when she was working for schlatt at the white house.

Wilbur- no no why how? Pls no?

Wilbur and you were probably the closest, he found you in the forest over 12 years ago chasing after foxes and collecting berries Wilbur always wanted a younger sibling as this point Phill only had thecno and Wilbur.

Phill- oh no poor y/n.

Tommy- what the fuck how?

Phill when he first saw you recognised you emidiatly looking much like your father. However he knew the man and knew what he was like so he had no problems when you visited them for tea many nights a week. He did think about adopting you right after Tommy arrived as you looked after him so well. Crafting him many clothes and many pumpkin pies. So so so many he always asked Phil if he had the recipe as he knew you couldn't make them as frequently as you used to.

Everyone was going to miss you greatly they just didn't expect to see you at the festival but now as ghosty/n. All your tries and efforts were in vain. Manburg still got blown up. But you did make good friends with Ghostbur. Glatt knew off you but was too embarrassed to see you.

Ugh ok this took me over two hours to write non stop. I just got this idea and ran with it omg I got so carried away. As of now probably my fav story.

[middle-class-trash]

Rise of the Titans liveblog!!!

that intro made me unexpectedly emotional

So if Blinky is narrating, he can't die, right? Right????

BRO THE SUBWAY SCENE!!!! We're getting right fuckin into it!!!

Steve, my son!!!

I wish Toby wasn't a constant punchline 🙃 it just makes me not take his character seriously

CLAIRE!!!!!!

Something about Douxie decking Skrael at the first opportunity is just so sexy of him

Jim is incredibly brave but it's really reckless to go hand-to-hand with a demigod without proper armor

My heart goes BUMBUMBUMBUM when Douxie looks out the traincar window

Sexy traincar tracks spell WHO

THE WRECKAGE AWWWW

Oh my gosh the people stuck in the magic circle because they wouldnt get out of the way

NO NO NO DOUXIE NO

So they were arrested that early?? Jeez

Nari's such a cutie

"None of us will be talking to you" *cut to Toby spilling every bean*

TOBY'S FACE AT THE END HAHHAHAHA

Something about Nari's voice coming out of Douxie's body is so deeply odd

Oh hey, Krel to the rescue

AREA 49 HAKSHDKSKD

"And your mom."

Oh my gosh he's still broken from Wizards 😂

The Guardians are just dead set on pissing off local authorities huh

JIM!!!

STRICKLER?????

BARBARAAAAA

Stricklake supremacy 😌 they both look so good

Claire listening in ��😭😭 she's so cute

AWWWWW ENGAGED ENGAGED ENGAGED

......does that give them death flags? Fuck. Fuuuuck fuck fuck fuck. It totally does.

AWWW DOUXIE!NARI HUGGING ARCHIE

Aja!!!!

Your majesty!!

Oh yikes, here's that running gag everyone was talking about.. pregnant Steve

Oh hey, Eli's hot now. We been knew 😂

"Mazel tov!" HAHA

Poor Jim needing a bunch of support to walk 🥺 he's such a trooper

I will simply pass away if Blinky dies

I hope Douxie is okay, we haven't seen him in Nari's body and that makes me ✨nervous✨

OH JKJK

Nari is so goddamn pretty

"Only your presence, not your commitment" is such a rapey saying

"Abra-cadabra, buttsnacks" I love that he still says that 🥺🥺 he loves his friends so much

"Do your worst" *cue both Douxie and Nari absolutely screaming in pain*

Krohnisfere? Alrighty then, that's the first mission

"I wouldn't be so sure of that" AWWW

They fixed the amulet???? DUUUUDE

"For the good of all..." 😭😭😭😭

"Or I could lock onto Nari and portal us there" *dead fucking silence*

I hate how Toby's used as a constant punchline.. a penny? Really?

TRAINTRACK MAGIC CIRCLE GO BRRRR

Poor Nari 🥺 Douxie's in so much distress

Oh no, the new amulet isn't working?? Fuckk

That absolutely gorgeous screencap of pissed Aja

Part of me is glad Nari was forced to do this and wasn't actually a traitor

Ice titan awakening sequence? Ice titan awakening sequence.

Oh Nari. Oh sweetie

Oh my gosh she's fucking tied to her titan

Boiling water!!! Or underwater explosion, that works too. Much more dramatic but that's Bellroc's style

Oh wow Steve actually has a bump?? What the fuck???

Oooh, TrollDragons?

Charlie!!!

"We still don't have a trollhunter" Aja, honey, not helpful

"Does he even trust himself? AJA, HONEY, NOT HELPFUL

Barbara being proud of her son 😭😭

OOH fusing excalibur with the armor?

Aja is so full of confidence, it's a good look for her

Steve being preggo is..really fucking weird. When they said

AWWW BLINKY AND AARRRGHHH

Your honor, I love them

OOH IS IT SOFT JLAIRE TIME

Ohhhh it's soft Jlaire time

He's always looking out for his mom 🥺

"I will always be here (head), and here (heart)" just fuck me up fam

Charlie!!!

Zong-Shi?

"Only death will come to those who go looking for it" oh dear

"The troll with many eyes" how does Charlie know Blinky? 😂

AYYY this where the banner that I found first is from!!! it was so cool seeing my screenshot circulate when we were starved for content 😂😂 everyone was posting various rott icons and banners that they got hoping they'd find a new one

Oh dear.. government

Blinky dear they can't understand you

"Holy frijole" Claire I simply adore you

WOW THAT'S PRETTYYYYY

Troll slaves???

So is Zong-Shi this ugly ass pear-lookin ass

Aja chilling with Jim even though she has doubts is an interesting strategic choice

Douxie, AARRRGHHH, and Nomura? Talk about rarepare

NOMURA CATCHING HIM 😭😭 SEXYYYY

DOUXIE RESCUING NOMURA 😭😭😭😭 SEXXYYYYY

If I havent said it yet, the animation is breathtaking

OH SHIT JIM

aaaaand here come those frozen wings

Nari cant be in control of herself, there's no way. She's still tied to the titan for Pete's sake

NOMURA????

Please dont let this be a sacrifice

PLEASE NO

BOTH CHANGELINGS????

STRICKLANDER??????

No on-screen death, so it's not real. No on-screen death, do it"# notbsmejelreal

NO ON-SCREEN DEATH BUT IT'S NOT REAL

THEYRE TALKING AHOUT HIM PAST-TENSE NOOOO

THEY RBOGUHT UP HIS DADDDDDD

"There's no revelation I can give you" is a great way of saying he's not relevant, genuinely

Oh wow this guy's freaky

Ohhhh so the green thing from the trailers and promo photos is the Krohnisfere

Archie to the rescue!!!

"That's my boy!" AWWE

"Claire nooo, no no no no YESSS, I'm free!!!" Blinky, never change 😂

Oh wow, they're already in contact with Bellroc's titan??

Different note, but the titan's designs are just different enough to make them interestun

VARVATOS??? Okay jk somehow it's gun robot lmfao

WAIT NEVER MIND HAHAHAH HI BUD

....if the bridge falls, can't Charlie just fly them across

LMAO he just saw his death?? That is what he wanted to see 🤷🏻‍♀️

It's too early to celebrate, there's no way Bellroc is down after just a few pinches

Yeahhh

Oh dear... is Varvatos in danger?

Claire being the warrior of the group is incredible and sexy and hhnnngggg

Toby is a Hufflepuff. I will not be answering questions

OH WOW THAT'S HOW HE BURNED HIS HAND??? THE HONRGAZEL?????

ARCHIE SAID GOODBYE??? NO NO NO NO NO

Douxie's gonna be a flat mess!!!

God, plus Nomura and Stricklander

NOOOO DOUXIE YOU BIG SWEETIE

Oh my gosh this is the scene with Douxie trying to connect with Nari, it has to be

"I need to try again" AWWW HONEY

That shot of Mexico was incredibly stereotypical

DOUXIE SWEETHEART 🥺🥺

He's trying to hold her hand???? AWWWW

Oh my gosh he's being choked 😳

NARI BABY!!!!

The huggos 🥺🥺

Jim being frustrated is totally realistic

Wait wait wait waittt do they have the entire titan at their disposal?

"There's absolutely nothing all the way out here" cue a titan. Any of them.

And there it is.

CLAIRE SUPREMACY!!!!!!!

White haired Claire? White haired Claire???

Oh dear it's like.. a little over halfway and there's so much left that could happen

COACH. COOOOACH

OH THANK GOD!!! Steve doesn't need another paternal figure dying on him

Time for Skrael to fuck shit up 😬

I find it interesting how Bellroc and Skrael's titans are both bipedal but Nari's is on four legs, much more animalistic

NARI, NOOOOO PLEASE NO

At least Skrael's done????

We kinds knew Bellroc was the final boss but NOT LIKE THIS

DOUXIE SCREAMING FOR HER

NOOOOOOO

No more running. GODDAMNIT

The three can no longer unite but Bellroc can still fcuk shit up

A HIDDEN PAGE??? FUCK THE WORLD IS TO BE REFORGED WITH FIRE

THE HEARTSTONE??????

Oh shit, the explanation for why Arcadia's the center of everything!!

The only heartstone?? Really???? That's scary as shit, trolls could go instinct without a reliable hearthstone!!

EXCALIBUR TIMEEE

JIMMMMMM

Come on honey, you can do it!!

Aja, honey, I love you so much but now's not the time

THE HEARTSTONE???? FUCK DUDE

.......Steve

Eli the midwife?? ...gross

Jim, my love, my baby boy!!!

The nine of them!!!

AWW BLINKY BEING THE BEST DAD

THEY WORK TOGETHER 😭😭😭😭

FUCK YEAH!!!!!!

"Quiet desperation" is a great word for it

Are we coming on to the big final battle?

Ohnoohnoohno they all said the thing 😭😭😭 someone's gonna die. At least one more is gonna die.

HE'S DRIVINGGGG. LOVE THAT FOR HIM

STICKY SPELL TIME!!!!!!

"Some sort of stickum!" Bro 😂😂

I love how he calls them all Trollhunters 😭 throwback to the OG show where the three of them were all called that

Aja Terron supremacy

Oh it's weird.. it's very weird. Why did Steve have to be pregnant again

Oh dear, there's half an hour left.. this has to be the final battle

JIM

Varvatos shielding Claire and Krel 🥺

Fuck, man, people are getting thrown left and right

DOUXIE MY LOVE

Oh here we fucking go, rematch

NEW AMULET???

Jim's about to get royally fucked up

LIKE THAT

FUCK

WHY IS SHE TAKING HIM??? GOD NO

Anti-magic beacon??

Helloooo that's smart asf

This gives Mount Doom vibes

"Embrace your loved ones for the final time" FUCK MAN STOP IT

"I already was" DAMN RIGHT BUD

NEW AMULETTTT

GO GET JIM GO GET 'IM

DAYLIGHT ARMOR!!!!!!

He was ready to just sacrifice himself like THAT

DAYLIGHT ARMORRRRR WITH EXCALIBUR??????? FUUUUCK

Jim being great at combat is just the best fucking thing

Oh fuck. OH FUCK.

STABBED??????

PLEASE NO, GOD NO

FUUUUCK

"I'm powerless" "You get used to it" WE DONT HAVE TIME TO UNPACK ALL OF THAT

JIM HONEY PLEASE DONT DIE

Is that....is that it?? Oh dear god, is that it????

JIM WHERE ARE YOU

I'm calling it now it's too early to be celebrating

Oh god the weird babies

WHERE IS TOBY

WHERE

NO

MY JAW FUCKING DROPPED

NO WAY, NO FUCKING WAY

HE'S GETTING A DYING MONOLOGUE??????

ALWAYS HAVE BEEN, ALWAYS WILL BE

"Itll be the two of us at the end" WHY DOES THAG SEEM LIKE JIM WILL GO OUT TIO

THERE'S NO WAY TOBY JUST DIED

THHERE'S NO WAY

That was sad as fuck but in a narrative way I hope it's permanent

Oh dear, Jim's going back????

Oh shit

WWHAT IS HE DOING

NOOOOO

"I have cherished every moment with you" STOP IT HE'S HIS FATHER

"I FYOU WERE MY OWN SON" STOPPPPPP

WHAT'S HAPONEINGGGGG

CLAIRE

NOOOO

THIS IS WHERE IM SOBBING

THIS IS WHERE IM LOSUNG IT

"Dont give up on me" FUCK STOPPPP

"I WILL ALWAYS BE HERE AND HERE" FUCK IT STOPPPPP

"I would date you for a hundred lifetimes" IS REALLY BEING TESTED HUH

THERE ARE 10 MINUTES ELFT WHAT THEBFUCK

AND WE'RE BACK TO TROLLHUNTERS?.????

HUHHHH

Fuck, man. FUCK, MAN.

Oh, Toby. Ohhhh Toby

CLAIRE 🥺

ROMEO AND JULIET!!!!

Oh my fucking god

"IF YOUD COME OVER TO DINNER" AYYYYY

His smile at Steve 🥺

HE'S HAVING TOBY TAKE THE CANAL???? But wouldnt the amulet still call for Jim?????

"Nothing interesting ever happens in Arcadia" VERY FUCKING FUNNY

Destiny is a gift. Some go their entire lives living in an existence of quiet desperation, never learning the truth- that what feels as though a burden pushing down upon our shoulders is actually the sense of purpose that lifts us to greater heights. Never forget that fear is but the precursor to valor. That to strive and triumph in the face of fear is what it means to be a hero. Don't think. Become.

.......it actually called his name. I can't believe it actually called his name.

The fuck is that ending??? Let Jim REST

[onepunchmiss]

OPM s2e10 Live Blog

“Justice Under Siege”

ALRIGHT so despite the fact that it is the 1 week anniversary of my death, OPM has forcefully wrenched me from the underworld to come continue with the season. So here I am and I’ve already posted my guess for what this episode will entail so lets see how well I handle it! (see: how much I scream) As always, I’m watching as someone who is up to date on both the Manga and webcomic

ASDFGHJKL I OPENED OPM ON HULU AND IT IMMEDIATELY PICKED UP WHERE I LEFT OFF AT REWATCHING THE ZOMBIEMAN BIT HOW DARE I WAS NOT READY

lets try that again ok

AHA YES OMG we’re starting with this!! I was totally expecting to pick up exactly where we left off, with Destrochloridium at the HA but OK throw me for a loop! Mix it up! “ORA ORA ORA ORA” I love Saitamas VA, I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again I laffff oh my god it keeps going in the background as Kind talks I can’t

This is the scariest Saitama face I have ever witnessed wtf??? Why does it look so creepy?? Also, they added quite a bit to this scene huh? I guess They have to amp up the jokes since shit is getting pretty serious otherwise at this point in the series. OH SHIT THE DING ‘NO OTHER WORDS CAME TO MIND” OK Excellently done that got me I cackled fffffffffffffffff

OH MY GOD KING THAT SICK BURN?!?! I dont remember that I guess they’re really making it a point to be like ‘HEY LOOK THIS IS GONNA BE USED!!! IT EXISTS!!!’ but like I dont care cause it was worth it for the joke hhhhhhhhhhhJUST

Yanno, I just realised I think I know where every sing scene in the whole opening comes from down to the omake. Also just realised we are definitely getting Genos/Bang/Bomb vs Centipede cause that joint attack Bang and Bomb use is in the opening. Huh why did that only just now click anD OH MY GOD BB GENOS IM DYING NO

Ok now we’re where we left off and oh dear god I HATE that squish noise please stop no OK Gyoro’s weird Eye twitch was a cool touch. Oh wait Narinki is the highest ranking executive now? I thought he was just the top donor of funds or something? eh anyway- lol wow Gyoro puts on a convincing sob story voice this is so funny?? Cause its Complete BS and I wonder what my reaction would be if I didn’t already know that AHH OK BUT THAT ‘HEHIHIHIHIHI’ LAUGH THO OMG SO GOOD

WHEW ok but seriously just the MENTION of assembling all the heroes is raising my blood pressure asdfghjkl if I may have one thing in life PLEASE LET IT BE A THIRD SEASON PLEASE IM BE G G IN G

AHH YESSS!!!! YYYEEESSSS!!!!! DARKSHINE MY DUDE MAN BRO GUY YESSSS!!!!!!! I LOVE!!!!!!! I JUST!!!!!! HAVE A SOFT SPOT FOR THE OTHERWISE NORMAL GUYS WITH OBSCENE MUSCLES LIKE DARKSHINE AND TTM!!!! AHHHHHH!!!!!!!

ASDFGHHJKL Did Destrochloridium just shout Itadakimasu?? HULU y u no translate that??? DOI as he gets smooshed pfffffftttttttttttt omg the sound pls ohmigod everyone knows steel is no match for a hardened body i just fukken HEKK I love this show so much pls he sounds so concerned that destro DIDNT know that

“Better step up” OH MY GOD YES DO THE THING

OK WAIT This is actually badass and not just a joke?? Darkshine, er, Blackluster(??) stop u r 2 good I cant handle it rn

oooohhhhHH OH OH OH OH PLS SHOW EVERYONE I WANT PLS THE MONSTER ASSOCIATION!!! PLS!! SHOW ME WIFE?? CADRES?? PLZ?? yo total side note but I LOVE Murata’s monster designs?? Every time I reread opm I just oogle at a new one I never noticed before they’re all so unique and good. Also At least 3 of them in this sequence look like pokemon i swear- lol the silence no applause, if that was a joke in the manga i totally missed it uuuuwaAAAAAAAAAAA SCREAMING SCREAMING I AM SCREAM CADRE YES YES ASDFGHJKL ARE YALL READY TO SEE T H  A T FACE FOR THE REST OF THE SERIES THUS FAR???? HUH????

ew oh wait I actually feel bad for Awakened Cockroach, and he twitches after getting eaten oh noooooonono ew oh no dude im sorry no AAAAAAAAA WIFE HELLO oh their voices are so sad when they’re terrified for their lives I dont like it :[ ITS OK UR SAFE 4 NOW ILY PLZ BE CAREFUL AND STAY AWAY FROM PRETTY MEN 

YES THIS EPISODE IS GIVING ME EVERYTHING IVE  WANTED SO FAR THANK YOU SO MUCH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH LOOOOOOOK AAT THEMMMMMM

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMY TRASH SON I HAVE MISSED YOU OH NO MY EYES THERES WATER IN MY EYES HELP ILY

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMYCYBORG SON MY HEART I WEAK GENOS BB PLS BE CAREFUL ILY TOO hey heres a WACKY  and TOTALLY LoOnEy IdEa, what if,,,,,,,,,,,,,,WHAT-IFF,,,,,,,,,,, everyone was HAPPY???? Crazy I knowww I just want the best for my sons and babies and children boys wives daughters loves and husband, is it so much to ask???

Oh my god he looks so Sad here please no Genos everything will be ok please don’t be reckless do not be reckless listen to Dr. Kuseno you fool 

[SCREAMING] ASDFGGHJKL LOOKIT HIM EATING OH MY GOD MY BOY MY DELINQUENT SON GET BETTER SOON oh my god i started out fine this episode but its KILLING ME there are TOO MANY PEOPLE AT ONCE i CANNOT BREATH

CHILD EMPEROR MY SON I LOVE YOU TOO BOFOI UR AN ASS oh my god please can you even TRY to be a good mentor for the kid???? Thats it Zombieman adopt him pls remove shitty Bofoi influence replace with Best dad man influence. ANYWAY ok that was a tangent huh oops sorry. Ok but look at him. Child Emperor is genuinely adorable and a sweetheart poor kid don’t lose your faith in adults.

Uh, the episode is running late still not to Garou yet either?? hmmmmmmmmm again I’m getting nervous are they gonna rush it?? lol the saitama throwaway OH OH FINALLY OMG MY HEART ISNT READY MY FAVORITE GAROU IN THE WHOLE SERIES OH MY GOD

im… im screaming… i love these two so much it hurts it does really. I was not prepared for how adorable it was possible to make Tareo either can I hug?? I must hugg?? And Garou’s voice is so calming and he’s being so sweet? I was really expecting to sound more… i dont know, whiney? Every time he shows up on the screen I love him more and more ffs

This is such a good shot. Desktop wallpaper material right here.

Oh my god, this moment. And the music is just yanking my heart strings stop.

Oh yeah, they interrupt right. I like these heroes and all, but none of them are particular faves the fact that I think SO MANY OTHER FAVES were are RIGHT before them this ep just kinda overshadows their existence for me. I think this is the ONLY time in the series where Garou goes up against heroes and i cheer for him 110%, don’t even feel a little bad about who he’s beating the shit out of, and that’s kinda messed up of me but thats how impartial I am towards all these guys?

Back to Garou and I love him. hhhhh.

He smak the table

He laughs. Oh no his laugh. OPM forcefully dislocated me from the underworld to watch this episode and has thusly YEETED ME TO HEAVEN THAT LAUGH. I really need Garou to be happy.

Do you see this man? Do you see him? I do and I’m crying thank you

Omg I got really caught up it watching them talk but the sparkles around death gatling whe Tareo was looking at them snapped me out of it. oi I cant handle this. Garou I want you to know that you have successfully turned the bad guy into the one everyone wants to win. You did it boy you did

WOAHMYGOD THIS IS BEAUTIFUL

OH MY GOD AND THE MUSIC IM SCREAMING

GAROU

YOU

ARE  

AMAZING SON

like I know how this goes but I’m so anxious anyway the hhhhhhhhhhhhh the fight choreography is a little clunky but I don’t care OH ok cool Glasses actually kept his little spotlight nice but Garou GAROU PLS B CAREFUL OK except WHAT THE FUCK IS HIS MOUTH DOING THAT LOOKS SO STUPID WHAT THE HELL?? HOLY SHIT IM GETTING DIZZY STOP wh- wh- wait no. NO IM NOT DONE WITH YOU YET COME BACK PLEASE I NEED MORE WAIT NO UHG this is my reaction at the end of every episode when will I learn?????????????? never. The answer is never.

NO POST CREDITS STINGER and AS MUCH AS I LOVE GENOS’S FACE I already knew he would be in the episode next week. Yall I am so lost as to where the final episode will land. WTF.

This ep was a roller coaster oh my god. Non stop plot not that the tournament is done, and we saw like EVERY CHARACTER my feeble heart could not keep up. The ONLY thing that bothered me was part of the fight sequence at the end, like it was half drawn beautifully half animated so stiff and blocky ??? Threw me for a loop. But next week is only gonna get more intense??? I’m gonna guess we’ll get through the Elder Centipede fight??? But then what does that mean for the last episode??? I am full of SO MANY QUESTIONS??? I really don’t want the season to end yet, 12 eps is not enough. There’s only 2 more. Just. I’m not ready to let go of my bbs it feels like I only JUST got them… Well! Before I devolve into more of a blubbering mess, thanks yall so much for reading!!! As always, see yall next week!

[hiraethstill]

THIS WEEK ON DAIYA NO ACE (6/25)

SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT!!!

LIVEBLOG:

cries loudly WHY THEY GOTTA KEEP MAKING ME MISS HONGOU

miyuki shock face is so good

the opening always reminds me of chakde india and now im sadder

now, is koushuu mad bc miyuki hit the nail on the head or he doesn't like how "casually" miyuki is treating this/him

yayyy koushuu finally playing a bit with sawamura!

and LOOK AT THESE PROUD FIRSTIE FACES

i love that sawamura takes koushuu seriously!

SERIOUSLY THEY SO PROUD

im McCrying WHY is Asada Hirofumi So Fucking ADORABLE

im sobbing the firstie pitchers admire him so MUCH

lmao and taku's eyezoom at koushuu and his motivations

"i cant look away" taku das kinda gay

this little sequence was pretty and well done

ah yes

koushuu's Awakening

that catcher solidarity tho

LMAO eijun throwing shade at miyuki is one of my favorite things

LISTEN

L I STEN

IF I REMEMBER RIGHT, IN THE MANGA TAKU WAS STARING WITH A DIRECT LINE OF SIGHT AT KOUSHUU'S BUTT

IM NOT EVEN THIRSTY BUT THAT MEANS THEY ROBBED US I TELL YOU

THEY ROBBED US

omggg even yui recognized sawamura-senpai!!

uHHHHH ASAKUKI RIGHTS???

kuki immediately turns to asada to ask

im

STOP SLEEPIN ON EM

MY HANDSOME BOI

SERIOUSLY WTF WHY DOES TAKU GET PRETTIER EVERY TIME

taku also slowly joining sawamura-senpai fanclub hyaha

LISTEN I KNOW I PAUSED AND SCREENSHOTTED AGAIN AFTER LIKE TWO SECONDS BUT JUST

LOOK AT HIM

L O O K  A T  H I M

I LITERALLY STARED AT THESE SHOTS FOR LIKE FIVE MINUTES

himst prettyy

oh wow this music change ooh

OOH EIJUNS EYES

HOLY SHIT THIS INTERMITTENT FADING THING

SO COOL

listen i know a lot of people have gripes about this season's animation

but honestly i don't mind since they have singular moments like this, and hongou, and mei that just pop out because of it

and tetsu's voice narration?????? im deceased????????

HIMST PRETTYY

LMAO THEY STILL PROUD BBIES

still loving these fadeaways

SHOCKU.JPG

god the firsties shocked are just the cutest

lmao that moment when you cant see a character's eyes at all on their face

BALL ANIMAT I O N

me: i should not not screenshot taku yet again

roel voice: sun

roel voice: sun

roel voice: sun

roel voice: screenshot the boi

lexie voice: bitch

so i guess yall get another taku screensHOT

"koushuu always thought highly of him" gay on many levels

take a shot every time taku says "koushuu"

also the WAY he says it im

his voice is so nice wtf i know its yamashita daiki aka deku but STILL

oh my gOD KOUTAKU FLASHBACK???

I REMEMBER THAT TAKU WAS ASKING HIM WHERE HE'D GO AND NOW IM REMEMBERING THAT HE FOLLOWED KOUSHUU TO SEIDOU IM

SO MANY POSSIBILITIES

PURPLE LASER BEAM BALL

oh god the NUMBERS

kuki and asada being in awe let me ADOPT THEM

SCREAMS IN CUTTER KAI

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

miyuki failing to catch pitches eyes emoji

HOLY

HOLY S

HOLY SH

HOLY SHI

HOLY SHIT

IM

DO YOU SEE THIS SEQUENCE WITH THE CUTTER KAI IM

IM FUCKING

I NEED TO WATCH IT AGAIN

MORESHOCKU.JPG

THIS IS ME

THIS IS ME RIGHT IN THIS VERY SECOND

NOO THE BULLPEN DIRT SCENE

at least theres a positive spin on it this time

LMAO THE BAT FAIRY

ALSO I LOVE "AMAHISA-SENPAI"

lmaooo they calling kousei out on his bs

YOOOOOOOOO

THESE ICHIDAI FIRSTIES ARE SO CUTE?

IMMEDIATE ADOPTION

yoooo wait, ichidai coach and that slim tshirt? good look on him

obligatory dramatic af amahisa staring into the moonlight pose

interesting, furuya's goals sound much more specific

and he's gained enough to note that he lacks in some areas

I THINK I JUST SAW NISHINO

SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

CARLOSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

YALL ALREADY KNOW HOW MUCH I LOSE MY SHIT OVER CARLOS

AND DW I ALSO LOVE THE REST OF THESE GOOD GOOD INAJITSU BOIS TOO

AKAMATSU WHY ARE YOU TALLER THAN CARLOS YOURE NOT ALLOWED TO DO THAT NO

ooh teito

who dis cutie next to mukai

seidou firsties whom i dont know the names of,,,,,, cute,,,,,,,

oh wait that one's kagami kouta i know that one

MORE ASAKUKI RIGHTS

"sasuga sawamura-senpai" YOU SAY IT TAKU

LMAOOO oh koushuu

LMAO OMG

why are you apologizing taku omg

is it that bad

OH LMAO ITS KOUSHUU'S FANTASIES OF EVERYONE BEING EVIL TO HIM

tho... i wonder if that stems from-

and i oop-

thats spoilers

manga spoilers i mean

ANYWAY

i love how taku's so impressed by koushuu's ability that he's super impressed that sawamura is so much above that

supportive boyfriend to the max yo

still love taku's voice

"and that's imperfect?" oh man that just slams home how much POTENTIAL eijun has i just wow

HE'S SO LITTLE

"who knows when furuya will screw up" LMAOOOO

SACHIKO QUEEN

lets play the spot how many ships are sitting together in this picture game

kanetou leaning forward suddenly and so in sync im living

furuharu riGHTS

is it just me or does kataoka look really different

norisawa, asouseki, and masayui all in the same pic wow im so good at this game

kurami and shirasu/zono too omg

NABEEEEEEEEEE

go takami and hoshida!

and miyamoto and mori and all you good ichidai bois

oh man that nod between kuramochi and kataoka i love it when mochi is trusted and responsible

SOBS LOUDLY

WHY IS HE SO PRETTY

takatso/oka rights

oh my gOD i love the third years theyre all SO surprised that miyuki won im dying

even shirasu hyahaha

be still my heart

look at that nice balance, kuramochi should cough cough ahem ahem da nc e

amahisa buoy is BACC

HELL YEAH KURAMOCHIIIIII

YOU SLIDE INTO THAT BASE MOCHI

HYAHA with that cool look

and miyuki's little fist pump omg

he "pounced" on the pitch huh? like a big cat?

LMAO and eijun is right there to agree

i mean, theyre not gonna want to listen to you if you force them to be a certain way, ochiai

WHOA HIGASA SPEAKING

and lmao asou cute

LMAO SAWAMURA THE BUNT MASTER'S SEAL OF APPROVAL

harucchiiiii

omg im so emotional that sawamura still does miyauchi's nostril flare thing

amahisa's eyes pretty too

preview

hsldkfjsd harudanji

ooh pretty shots of toujou and haruichi

intense end card!

SUMMARY/TLDR:

kou + sawa battery!

NUMBERS

proud firsties!

ROBBED OF TAKU STARING AT BUTT

C U T T E R  K A I

asakuki/koutaku RIGHTS

inajitsu & teito!!! (coughs in carlos)

sawamura-senpai fanclub!

miyuki... won janken?? HSDF

MOCHI KICKING IT OFF

[dorms-fic-archive]

Eidolon

Summary: ei·do·lon [īˈdōlən]NOUN (literary) 1. an idealized person or thing. 2. a specter or phantom. [Ao3 | FFNet.]

a/n: This is my first fic posted to the side account, and it's…well, it’s pretty grisly stuff, considering Isayama’s clarification that Eren was indeed responsible for his condition, come the Marley-centric time skip. Should be noted that the tone and subject matter will not necessarily be an indicator of my regular output; but feedback is welcome, all the same.In ancient Greek literature, an eidolon (plural: eidola or eidolons) is a spirit-image of a living or dead person; a shade or phantom look-alike of the human form. The concept of Helen of Troy’s eidolon was explored both by Homer and Euripides.

Decided, first and foremost, that he would not perform the operation under sedation—taking no chances, with no one to help him—but instead find some privacy in this worn-down house; it was summer morning, before the sun had risen to its zenith about the horizon, one of the many ghost towns within reclaimed Titan territory, a phrase that would have thrilled him with dread two years ago but now, approaching eighteen, he felt nothing but the quivering in his limbs as he unbuttoned his trousers—no point in ruining them—and stood, bare-legged—his heart pounded and he felt his palms, slick with sweat, pulse racing and fingers slow to obey him—tried to breathe, steady, and took in dust, trying not to wheeze—but in the back of his mind, knew this was going to be a thousand times worse than the jaws of a mindless Titan on a burning roof, where shock and adrenaline had deafened the blow, numbing him to all else but the sudden shock of falling—no, this would be an ordeal, slow and tenuous—he was no coward, no stranger to discomfort or stitches or pain but—his hands were shaking anyway, and he grit his teeth and did not think of Armin or Mikasa or Captain Levi (who could and would honestly do a much better job and chastise him concurrently, a thought which made him laugh—retaining a sense of humour, however grim, would make this easier)—or even Commander Hanji—standing still, covered in shadows and the buttery sunlight creeping in through the torn roof—warmth kissed his skin—until he was able to move on trembling legs, over to the long-abandoned bed in this nameless home that had perhaps once held a living being, a family, now reclaimed by nature—the bedsprings squeaked in protest to bear his weight, and—inhale, exhale (the inhuman noise made him shudder again)—until he was a little surer, wishing, childishly that he had someone here to guide his hands, but he couldn’t always be so lucky—calm enough now to think, clearly, about how he was going to go about this—

He had brought some supplies, of course; a fresh sheet to wrap his leg in, disinfectant—both filched from the infirmary (apologies and penance could come later), string with which to tie the splint, if he was conscious enough (don’t fucking think like that)—he laid all of this out without dwelling upon it and put his leg up straight, concentrated on breathing, goddam it—inhale, exhale, in—and his eyes caught the saw blade, which winked at him in the sunlight—if he could cut a sandbag in training with a simpler, flimsier blade, if he’d felled several dozen Titans already, then this would be child’s play—he told himself this stubbornly but there was a quaver in his hands as he took the hilt of the saw in his hands, heart pounding faster—took him a few minutes, breathing, breathing, slow and shaky, until his pulse could settle enough to entertain the notion of holding the blade aloft—

Who could he ask—but the answer was simple, in front of him—imagined peering into his own skull like a hollowed out bowl, devoid of gore or brain tissue, dry—the saw blade in his hands jittered and he clenched his fingers hard enough to ache, ache—held it to his leg and it was cold, sharp enough to wound if he pressed just a little more—flinched, wordless, stilling until he could summon enough courage to start—sawing, back-and-forth—father help me please—sinking into the depths of memories he did not call home—circular amputation, the phrase rebounding back like an imprint behind his eyelids and he looked down at his leg, trickling crimson—he’d barely even pierced the flesh and cursed, cursed, rapid-fire frustration willing himself to move, the simple sawing motion was all he needed, his breath barely hitching as he watched the metal began to slowly sink into himself—

—it wasn’t so bad, he thought, for a split-second; not so arduous, the uneven scrape back-and-forth of metal on flesh and sinew unnerving but of course it wasn’t so—blooming red, then the feeling came back into his limb or perhaps caught up with him, rushing to dig its teeth in and he was breathing hard, raggedly, heard the wet sound of flesh chafing and more, more blood but he wasn’t even halfway there—grit his teeth and tried to ignore the low keening in the back of his mind, interrupting the serration of tissue—an animal in distress, maybe—knew the answer but he couldn’t admit this to himself as he watched it sink in agonising centimetres—the nerves some time ago and the blood kept pouring and he wondered if he was in shock, unable to heal—choked out something resembling a scream but it died coming out of his throat—sawing with violence, frenzied but determined—imagine your leg in the mouth of a Titan—expected he was going to black out but he was still lucid—no sense of dizziness only clarity in agony—cutting, cutting; then, a sharp jolt against bone—he really did scream, then—

—a man’s voice at his ear, in his head, and hands, steadying him—he recognised it vaguely, trapped in the point between comprehension and acceptance—this voice had a name—what was it what was it—always there to pull him back after a Shift—and, here now, guiding him back to the reality of what was happening, always protecting him, not Armin or Mikasa or his father—and set in his certainty he began to dig the metal teeth into bone and his scream mutated into an incomprehensible snarling—the flesh began to steam, smelt like burning—he was going to vomit but the nausea had not risen beyond his fitful stomach—sawing, rhythmic—he could hear himself moaning, making noise just to hear himself over the sickening scrape of metal teeth—getting there, the pain resurged and his vision went dark for half-a-second, no—he felt the blood coming out of him warm and abundant—the man’s voice was saying something he didn’t understand and hands, not his own, steadied his wrists—was he dying?—felt like he was faraway but no, still clinging to consciousness and he pressed in sharp, taking in oxygen—breathing, back-and-forth, back-and-forth, sweat soaking his skin—felt like a fever breaking when the blade slid—going to black out this time, stupid fucking stupid you—something in his leg gave and Eren stiffened, this violent, droning noise that overrode the ringing in his ears and—realised, of course, who it was—gurgling, almost, as he watched the blood eclipsed by steam so thick he took it into his raw throat, wondered if he’d tear it from all the noise, accidentally laugh-shrieked and that, somehow, was what gave him the to take his ruined limb in his hands and wrap it several times over; not enough to stop the bleeding but he would heal, he’d healed before hadn’t he—the string, his fingers fumbled with red-slick sheets and skin until he relocated it at last—must’ve shoved it away with all his thrashing—bound his leg so tightly he could feel the blood trying to escape his constraints and—and his eyes rolled in their sockets, breathe, just—fucking breathe you idi—he couldn’t think anymore, only the same repeating sensation—steam trapped beneath the fabric drenched so thick he could see the torn flesh imprinted beneath and—he heaved, nose full of gore and steam and wood rot—threw himself sideways trying to vomit but nothing came out but whatever he’d had for breakfast that morning and he was still heaving once finished—began to sob quietly, without recess—father please it hurts someone help me dont want to die again please help me god—was he speaking aloud, hushed and thick with grief? he couldn’t tell anymore—still conscious, somehow—trost, in the belly of the beast surrounded by corpses he was going to throw up all over himself—whimpering turned to retching but after the third attempt, nothing came out—and he laid there, curled up, holding his ruined stump of a leg—drifting between consciousness and unconsciousness and better off dead—the image of himself fifteen redoubling and folded into itself, and someone else’s voice screamed for him—like photography, the word made a home inside his head,a still image, armin? no, that’s not it—and his hands spattered with blood were his own, he was sure of this, but not the image, overlaid—shifting gradually into a new scene, confronted with another man that did not exist—he turned about, looking for this spectre whom he had never known but yearned to—this man whose voice had watched over him longer than anyone else living—for what else was he to do but lie here crumpled, waiting for his leg to finish steaming?—on his side, the eyes in the face before him were grey, not his father’s; the face itself was sharp, angular, crow’s feet, short black hair streaked with lines of silver—might’ve been handsome at another time; Eren knew this because the man who’d saved his father knew this, and it was that certainty, that simplicity in knowing which grounded him to the present, his self-inflicted agony turning into relief, a sweat broken over his skin as he began to hyperventilate—but he was not afraid, not of his agony but the idea of failure—he would not fail—but the man was there and he was not, laying on his side and standing in another time and space—eye-to-eye—his namesake, this phantom; reached out with hands smeared with hemic substance and found Kruger’s hand, slender and older and clutched it—did not think of his father anymore but this stranger, this saviour who was here when nobody else was—

Eren realised he was shuddering—no protest, he was not in his right mind—it had been months, months on his own alone and he just—a dull whimper escaped him, frustrated—hemic, breath out easy, easy—calm down, the man was saying, quietly, or you’ll bleed to death—

—Eren clutched him tighter, snotty and shivering; probably stained the man’s jacket but it didn’t matter—only once Kruger pushed back awkwardly did he realise, dimly, that he was making a spectacle of himself and moaned, apologetic and hapless—Kruger shushed him—you’re delirious, that’s all—

—agony reduced to a throbbing of his pulse, aware of the blood spattering his skin—he breathed, in—out—in—out, with the man there, holding him—they weren’t so old—up close he smelt like hemic tissue and cigarettes—the vision and sensory stimuli melting into each other—this, he figured, was another path—

—I said you’re delirious, Eren—

—eren was almost a man himself, now—might’ve blenched at the thought of someone living in his head—but the guidance, in Trost, with the boulder, had never been his father’s or Frieda’s or anyone else but—

—what are you doing?—Kruger didn’t sound angry, just perturbed—and Eren held him tighter, wrapped his arms around him—stay with me, he murmured, please—

—he was nearly healed, he thought—there, said Kruger, look, it’s over—eyes tearing down his body to spot the obvious—a sudden violent urge to bury his nails into the flesh, tear apart the cruor—

—what do you expect to accomplish? Kruger muttered—and Eren could see for the first time his skin was scarred—like mine, and a new sensation erupted in his chest, took hold—he began to laugh, cradling the man in his arms—half-hysterical with thanks—this twisted protector—his only link to the past—buried his head to his breast and the man stiffened—

—this isn’t real, said Eren thickly—youre not real I want to be real—

—hands slender not his own caught him by the shoulder—he looked into a reflection of another’s eyes and yet it was himself in the void—fleeting pain, no stranger—he was too hot in these clothes, he thought vaguely—wanted to sleep but still full of energy—sir, he murmured, and Kruger did not exist in this point in this place but his eyes on him were a strange invasive comfort, shook him to his bones and his chest ached for something he had not wanted in a long, long while—sir, will you—he was slurring, not dead—victory in itself—he knew his own hands on his body, of course—his own fingers, slick with hemic fluid—shuddering not from pain so much—Kruger at his side, watching without contact—he could not touch him, really—as Eren began to relax—with no sense of time in this place, the guardian in his mind—

—you were asleep, Kruger told him calmly on his side, standing and laying prone in a strange spatial paradox that he didn’t remember falling away from—eren’s arms still around him, his eyes heavy and gummed to prove his point—realised he was shivering, cold-sweat—the urge to thank him overrode all else—nevermind the stump, just the body and—trembling as he felt the man shift against his body and stop, pausing; Eren shied away immediately, stammering—fuck I-I’m sorry, sir—because it wasn’t his knee chafing the air—the body—and—and he—he didn’t know what was wrong, with him what was wrong with him—they were nearly the same height now, thanks to a brutal series of growth spurts in the spring—summer, now—and he couldn’t stop, laughing, groggy and the man was staring not real you’re not real I wish you were—in the hands of a phantom—felt he should be ashamed for the state of himself, but—it wasn’t desire in a sense he could resonate with in his life’s experiences, not love or human longing for another person—merely the sheer, selfish need for tactile sensation, the verification of his own mortality—and the need to be touched itself, not borne of attraction but sheer animal sense—his hands were shaky, dried blood as he took it out, glancing at his leg, matted with dry gore and wanted to vomit again but didn't—

—somehow still here, choked out a groan, taking solace in the idea of his hands on his body his own hands no one else—dizzy with loss of blood, but the man was there watching and he was still—still here, still warm and alive, too tired to think much about what anything meant and he was biting the sheets, tasted copper and groaned louder—his throat ached—and chased after it—his body wracked with it and a hand not his own touched him firm—pressing his head into the mattress and shook and shook, defeated, moaning—sheer discombobulation, you’ve survived worse—release came too fast, winding down until his breath came back to him—the room seemed a little colder, and semen marked his hand and the gory sheet and he shut his eyes again—the shudder rolled up his spine, through his shoulders—and Eren or maybe Kruger said: head back to base, we’ll fix your eye later—and in the present, he grinned.

[moonie-here]

Shaken to the Core-Chapter 1

Fandom: Thomas Sanders/Sander Sides

Summery: Logan and Roman make a mistake with deadly consequences. Can Patton right their wrong before Virgil is gone forever?

Warnings: Angst. Crying. Non-descriptive body horror. General sad feeling. Slight physical fighting.

Pairings: Platonic Moxiety

ao3 link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13874427

{°°°}

The cracks first appeared he was alone.

Virgil was sitting on his bed drawing and listening to My Chemical Romance when he felt it.

It was as if someone had taken a sledgehammer to his ribs and mercilessly beating him with it. A scream of pain wracked it’s way up his throat, but was muffled by the sleeve of his hoodie as he threw his hand over his mouth.

Oh god oh god ohgodohgodohgod.

He crawled off of his bed over to the mirror on his wall, small sobs coming from his lips  even with his hand over his mouth as he worked his way over slowly to the mirror.

He took a minute to gain focus and work past the pain before yanking his hoodie off and lifting up his shirt.

When he saw what was there a much louder sob pushed from between his lips.

Cracks.

Starting at his left hip slowly working their way up his abdomen and onto his chest. Something that looked like oil and blood dripped slowly from the newly formed crevices in his skin. Bruises were forming around the edges in shades of black, blue and yellow.

He let his shirt slip from his fingers and sat back on his knees. He finally caught his own reflections eye in the mirror. His makeup was smeared down his red puffy cheeks and exposed the heavy, purple bags under his eyes. His hair was messy from where he had grabbed his head in a state of panic. He looked like shit. He felt like it too.

“So this is how I go huh?” He whispered to the empty room.

...

“Not surprised.”

{°°°}

He figured out pretty quickly what was happening. Patton would avoid eye contact, Roman didn't talk to him and Logan would freeze every time he entered the room.

They didn't tell him. He didn't expect them to. It was supposed to be a secret between the three of them anyway. Why make it awkward?

Oh hey, by the way, I totally know you got Thomas is to take anxiety medication. Yeah, also it's totally gonna kill me. Anyway how's your day been?

Not happening.

Whenever he felt the cracks worsen he simply shut himself in his bathroom for as long as it took for it to stop and to clean himself up. The blood-oil stuff was a mess to clean up so he stopped trying to clean the bathroom after every “attack”. It was gross but at this point he didn't care. He was dying after all.

This happened consistently for a week before it really got worse. The cracks spread rapidly and Virgil spent most of his time in his bathroom, which was now covered in a layer of black sludge. He left only if he knew nothing was going to happen, which was almost never at this point. And despite the fact that Pat had tried to talk to him consistently over the last two weeks he felt...so alone.

{°°°}

Patton missed Virgil. Ever since Logan came to him and Roman with the idea of medication he felt...iky. Roman had been on board right away but Patton wanted to ask Virgil about it and the others wouldn't let him.

He felt wrong. Virgil was his best friend and he hated lying. He had rarely seen Virgil since this entire thing started and when he did Virgil looked on the brink of death. It had been two weeks since they had they had a proper conversation and oh, he just wanted to hug his son right now. He wanted to help Virge with whatever was going on and see if the pills had done anything bad.

Patton was curled up in his bed debating on going to tell Virgil what was going on. He’d tried to check on the other side before but Virge had always turned him away saying “I’m fine,” or “I’m just tired.”

In fact Patton was so wrapped up in his own thoughts he only snapped out when a violent, hysterical scream pierced through the tense air of the mind scape.

He shot straight up, throwing his quilt and several stuffed animals off of his bed. He swung his door open and rushed into the hall looking around widely until another scream pierced it's way into his brain.

His stomach sank.

The scream came from Virgil’s room.

{°°°}

Virgil felt it coming. After about two weeks he could feel it before it hit, like someone would just start slowly squeezing his kidney until pain took over his entire body. The cracks almost covered his body now. Up to his collarbone, forearms and ankles.

This one was different though. He could tell. His stomach twisted differently and his hands shook more than usual. The throbbing all over his body was more intense as well.

This was gonna be the last one.He felt tears gather in the corner of his eyes as he walked shakily from the bathroom to the desk in his room. He didn't want to sit down but his legs were giving out.

He slumped into the chair and pulled out a new sheet of lined paper and his favorite pen. He couldn't figure out what to write to the others. He wanted to say goodbye but he wasn't good at all this mushy stuff.

Fuck it.

He poured out everything he was thinking onto the paper until he had to flip it over for more room. Halfway down the second side the pain hit full force.

He tried to push up to make it to the bathroom but ended up falling onto the the floor, chair toppling right alongside him.

The pain was so much at once. It tore through him. Literally. He couldn't breath, he could barely think. He wanted it to end.

Make it stop oh god oh god please helpme helpme helpme i should have told them i dont wanna die please stop it it hurts

Tears ran down his face as he curled into a ball. He clenched his jacket’s sleeves looking for some release but all he felt was his fingers cracking and slipping on the weird sludge that was now soaking the fabric. He felt a scream claw its way up his throat.

…

Hands.

Hands were on him. Pulling his own fingers from where he clenched the hoodie till it tore. Someone was crying and holding him. Pushing his bangs from his forehead, as he felt tears land on his face. The person was singing to him with shuddering breaths. He wish he knew who it was. He couldn't sort out any real thought and his body was thrashing out of his control, jerking violently in every direction.

You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are gray. You’ll never know dear how much i’ll love you. Please don't take my sunshine away.

Patton?

Virgil open his mouth to talk, only to start hacking up black sludge. The taste of mud and iron worked its way up his throat and passed his lips. I can't breathe!

The coughing, pain and cracking went on for what felt like hours. The presence of two others appeared by his side only to be pushed back by what he assumed was Patton. It took all of his strength but he managed to pull his eyelids apart. He locked eyes with Pat.

“V-virgil? Kiddo-o you with-th me?”

“Virgil, what caused this?” Virgil’s eyes flickered towards the voice even when his body jerked away, curling further into Patton’s arms.

“Not now Logan.” He looked back at Patton who was glaring at who he gathered was the logical side. Patton looked…. Scary. His eyes were red and watery but looked as if they were shooting daggers to kill someone. His entire face a bright pink in the non-blushy way. Sadness? Anger? This wasn't Pat.

He coughed again and all attention was back on him. He whimpered “P-patn?”

“Im here kiddo. Im right here…”

“Hurts...make it stop?”

He felt fingers run through his hair. “Yeah I know kiddo. I’m not sure I can make it stop, but i'm damn well gonna try.”

“I-I think ima die?”

The hand froze and three people sucked in at the same time.

“No. You're not gonna die Virgil. You're my best friend and im not letting you die.”

“I can feel it… I don't wanna die Pat.” His fists worked their way into his polo. “Don't let me die.”

Tears. Everything was blurry as tears ushered down his cheeks making tracks through the black goop that strained his face. He let loose a few strangled gasps as he felt himself crumble.

“NO! COME ON VIRGIL PLEASE! I-I cant l-loose you…”

“M’sorry Pat….”

{°°°}

Patton’s arms were empty now. They had been for an hour. At least what he thought was an hour. He didn't know anymore. He didn't care. His best friend died in his arms and he did nothing but cry.

When Virgil passed it was messy. A mix of dust and black sludge were pooled around him staining everything it touched. The only thing left was Virgil’s hoodie, which Patton had clutched in his closed fists. Logan and Roman were still standing in the doorway where Patton had kept them. He still didn't let them close. When Patton finally moved from his kneeling position, two hours and thirty-seven minutes later, he fell onto the edge of Virgil’s bed smearing black onto the mussed up sheets.

Logan spoke, breaking the silence. “Patton. We... we should clean this up.”

Pat looked up at him from the hoodie in his grip. Mouth opening and closing a few times before he found his voice. “No.”

“Pat this is hard for all if us but surely we cant-” Roman was cut of when a fist connected with the side of his face.

“Patton!” Logan yelled as Princey fell to the floor with a thud.

“NO LOGAN…” He yelled spinning to face the logical trait, and grabbing by his collar. “MY BEST FRIEND JUST DIED IN MY ARMS AND YOU BOTH ACT LIKE IT’S NOTHING!” He spat it out as if it was the most disgusting thing ever to touch his tongue.

Tears threatened to spill from Patton's eyes as he stared Logan down.

“He’s gone…

And it’s because of his own family….”

Pat let go of his shirt, arms swinging to his sides. A sob broke through his lips as he sank to the floor once more, curling up into a tight ball. His whole body shook as he cried loudly into Virgil’s hoodie.

Roman looked on in disbelief. Patton hadn't cried like this ever...not even when Thomas got dumped.

Bile rose in his own throat as he looked over the moral side. He threw his hand over his mouth in order to keep it down. Tears spilled down his own cheeks as he looked up at Logan.

His eyes widened when he saw red blotchy cheeks and shaking shoulders.

“What did we do?” He heard Logan whisper.

“Oh god what did we do…?”

@pattson @anxious-ball-of-sunshine @my-happy-little-bean @ironwoman359 @mirror2thespirit @shadow-walker-1201 @thecrimsoncodex (suffer with me)

[princesiddie]

honey x cliffs 🍯🗻

the beginning is so lazy dont look @ me

tw!! suicide, graphic injury, emeto sort of

There was a reason he was as afraid of heights as he was. There was a reason his hands so often lingered against the thick, twisted scars on his thighs, pressed flat against that pink, puffed skin, mind turning slowly over the sharp memories, made glassy with pain.

Honey remembered the wind. Up so high, so dizzyingly far from the ground, the wind was stiffer, colder, brought a tense shiver down his spine as he stood, fighting to keep himself upright before he was ready. He wasn’t ready, he wanted to cry to the heavens. I can’t do this. I can’t. I’m not ready. I’ve never been ready. His eyes stung at the biting wind, drying coldly the tears on his cheeks. Maybe this would do it, he thought. Maybe if he were hurt badly enough, broken beyond any repair, too shattered even for a fairy or Mipha’s Grace to fix, she’d let him die and stay dead. Maybe she’d finally leave him at peace.

He remembered the look of the world from the edge of that cliff. He remembered the shine of the sun off the snow, the blue of the sky, the green of the firs, the subtle warmth of the sun. He remembered the fear trembling in his chest, the way his stomach dropped when he stepped out into empty air.

He couldn’t remember the impact. He couldn’t remember the way he hit the ground, the way his body must’ve slammed into the dirt, the way his head must’ve cracked against the ground, the way his body must’ve shattered like glass. He couldn’t remember the pain. But he remembered waking up; he remembered the wet on his face, the heavy lopsided way his head felt as his eyes whirled and spun in his head, the sickening lightness in his flesh as he shifted, the shock of the warm of the air so close to the ground on his skin. He remembered how he screamed when the anguish reached him, when he tuned in to the sheer, chilling, dizzying fire burning throughout his body. He remembered the way his body trembled beneath him, so completely, profoundly injured it didn’t know what to do, so full of pain in every possible inch of him he could barely instruct himself to breathe, to suck in hot, shallow, desperate breaths that burned and howled in his chest as he did, fractured and twisting ribs stabbing into his lungs. He remembered the funny way his arm bent, the sharp curve in the middle that was already turning a sickly, terrifying wine red, the likes of which he had only ever seen on the bloated corpse of a boar. He remembered the way his wrist cracked and popped when he moved it to try and sit up; he thought distantly that he was perhaps grinding the very bones to dust. He remembered the wave of vomit it had brought rushing up to his mouth when he tried to move his legs, the gut wrenching, visceral agony tearing from his throat a raw, broken howl, somewhere between a scream and a sob; he remembered the way his voice had cracked and died like a strangled animal.

He remembered how he sobbed, breath sharp and hot and venomous in his throat, the stench of the puddle of vomit and blood he was too shattered to crawl away from, wafting into his nose with each frenetic gasp for air. He remembered the regret, the fear, the soft, fragile way he wailed, weeping out loud for comfort, for Sidon, for Hylia, for relief, for anyone, anything. He remembered the drip of thick, pink tears, leaking from an eye that involuntarily drooped and watered, colored with the blood from his broken nose, mixing into the shiny slick of spit and bile on the ground. He remembered the way his mind searched, dug and turned frantically—yet still so excruciatingly slowly, as if his own thinking were trudging through a sea of mud—for some way, any way out of this. He didn’t have any fairies or potions or foods, he had made certain of that; he hadn’t wanted to attract any animals to his corpse. He didn’t know where his slate had fallen. He hadn’t told anyone where he was going; he didn’t want to be responsible for anyone’s trauma, stumbling upon a corpse as mutilated and broken as his was meant to have been. He was lost. He was alone. He remembered the realization that he would die there, the realization that he’d have to suffer this agony, this unspeakable anguish until he succumbed to shock, or some beast drawn by the scent of his blood, or the elements, or dehydration or hunger or Hylia herself; he remembered the realization that he had failed.

He remembered biting through his lip as he shifted to grab his dagger from his pack, blood blossoming on his tongue as he bit back a sob, each inch he moved stirring up another nauseating wave of pain. He remembered the way his more intact hand shook as he gripped the hilt, something torn in his elbow making it difficult. He remembered flinching at the first bite of metal into the skin of his neck. He remembered his own rage, burning and blazing suddenly in his chest at how cowardly he yet remained, how scared he was still at the idea of dying, how tightly he still found himself clinging to life. He remembered the dull, muffled thud of his heart, pressing the tip of the blade into the soft flesh of his throat, fighting to steady his trembling enough to make a cut deep enough to not have to do the slice over again. He remembered closing his eyes. He remembered pain, sharper and hotter than the stuff below him, the chilling, terrible gush of something scalding over his hand and down his chest, the beginnings of a scream turning and swelling in his chest—

He remembered opening his eyes.

[swearronchanel]

BETTER LATE THAN NEVER 6.07

AHHH OMG, I was out all day & Actually MISSED the NEW episode like wtfff?!!? it was TOrture!! & I literally had to delete twitter and Tumblr off my phone because the devil himself would’ve tempted me lmfao😭 I love spoilers but not when everyone has seen the episode but me! it’s okay though I had some rum chata to distract me lol, which is just rum and horchata which is the Hispanic version of Horlicks so, At least I was in the CtM Spirit 🙃

Anyway I’m finally getting to watch it so here we go ..

shit I’m so nervous and I haven’t pressed play

why is my heart beating so fast omg

i usually skip the intro but I’m legit not ready

PHYLLIS !! 💕

damn Vanessa already hinting at what’s to come

Baby Susan so precious omg!!

No lie one of the prettiest babies I’ve ever seen. I’ve seen lots of ugly babies and lots of cute babies, I’m qualified to judge.

“Courage and resilience will matter most of all” 😭😭ahh omg

My spirit animal and campion Phyllis deserves nothing but the best I’m not ready to see her hurt

SHELAGH GETTING EXAMINED 😭😭💕💕 MY HEART IS BURSTING & her belly is so big omg!

CRYING SHE STILL CANT BELIEVE ITS HAPPENING ME EITHER BBY 😭 like holy shit I’m still not over it.

But I’m going to binge series 6 with my mother when I’m home Saturday and can’t wait for her to watch because she wanted to see shelagh have a baby & also she doesn’t know what tf has happened 😭😭😂 it’s been a crazy series! She will be s h o o k

“I know I’m just not a very relaxed sort of person” SAME but BBY RELAX 😭💕

LOL I WOULDNT HAVE READ IT EITHER

That was a cute moment with Babs and Shelagh!! But still wish it was w/ Trixie though 🙁 also it didn’t seem like a “heart to heart”? was it supposed to or was I expecting too much

Aw Rhoda 💔

what a ignorant ass teacher though, I’ll  FIGHT HER REAL QUICK

BOY OR GIRL??? I REALLY WANT TO KNOW UGH WHAT IS BABY TURNER??!

ugh Shelagh and Patrick’s faces 😫 I hope they don’t feel guilty for having a baby

But also why does shelagh have to keep wearing the same things lol, I feel cheated of all the cute maternity looks she could’ve served instead

“Having to explain” poor Mrs Antoine UGH THAT MAKES ME SO ANGRY, THERE’S NOTHING TO BE EXPLAINED   I’m mixed, Hispanic and white not black and white but still my dad is tan & we’ve been places where people have given my parents the dirtiest looks and have heard a nasty comment or two & it BOILS MY BLOOD

Omg the Antoine boys are precious

TRIXIE 😍😍 my bby looks good!

PHYLLIS IN TROUSERS HELL YES

UM VALARIE CAN U NOT BE RACIST

I swear if she says anything more I’ll lose my shit

“No one can really choose who they fall in love with” BLESS U DEELS

Bless Phyllis for making sure those cubs don’t grow up to be as ignorant as their parents

“I surmise the puller of teeth is intended to admire it” SISTER MJ IS A GEM

LOL SISTER J WANTS HIM TO COME THROUGH

SISTER WINIFRED WITH ANOTHER PRICELESS FACE IM DEAD

A bassoon? Lmaoo what the actual fuck Tim

Oh it’s for girls ofc LOL give him a girlfriend already, I’d get such a kick out of it. & Patrick could make another dad joke and say like take a lesson from me I legit beat God over a woman’s heart

The Mullucks fam 😭

Patrick with Susan omg aww

Trixie looking like a b a b e I’m dead 😍

“You’ll look like you’re trying to hard” DELIA HAHA OMG SHE GETS LIKE ONE MIN OF SCREEN TIME BUT SHE ALWAYS HAS GOOD LINES

I need Trixie’s everything, no joke. HOW

But I’m dying my hair blonder this week don’t play

Ah my bby shelagh again 😍💕

I feel so sorry for Patrick like this wasn’t your fault

LMAO SISTER WINIFRED CANT CONCENTRATE IN COMPLINE  SHE IS ANNOYINGLY PRECIOUS

She’s scared to take her driving test aw 😂😂 same like I have my permit but I’m scared to fail the actual driving test

“Oh I have a soft spot for the Antoines” PHYLLIS TIENE UN GRAN COROZON 😭

Omg Mr and Mrs Antoine are so cute too, dios te bendiga 😰

Christopher being a flake wtf no me gusta

Sister W is in on the drama like Sister B was, am I right??

LMAO HER RUN

Prosthetics are so wild, my abuelo has a prosthetic leg and I was so interested when he first got it. But also I’m going to hell for being evil because I joke around way too much when he’s extra senile

“People call my kids hair frizzy, but I think it’s beautiful” MY HEART😭💔 literally my mom was the same with me. Defensive over my curls - even tho my hair is frizzy sometimes😭

The song though, took me a second to process but that’s my bby shelagh’s song ?? Ummm wut

lol sister Winifred hella late, let me guess this will make her want to drive?

this prosthetic place is so great wow omg

damn it Bernie

PHYLLIS LOVES THIS FAMILY AND I LOVE THEM ALL OMG 😭😭

GET THE RUM ! or I will lol

ah never mind

LOL SISTER W AGAIN & PHYLLIS SHAKING HER HEAD

the question is, does/has sister Winifred drink/drank ? she seems like a light weight

fuck is this when it’s gonna happen

I’M NOT READY DAMN IT

damn Bernie..

UGH MY HEART IS RACING IM SO ANXIOUS AND SCARED AHJXKWLXM

HOLY SHIT OMGGGG

THAT WAS SO HARD AHH OMGG

IM FUCKING SCREAMING

Phyllis is in shock o h m y g o d

I can’t process this either

OMG I CANT DEAL

PHYLLIS IS SOBBING, IM SOBBING WTFFFF OMGG 😭😰😰😰💔💔💔

MY FUCKING HEART

I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO OMG

AW SISTER W ASWELL UGH WTF I SHOULDNT FEEL SO MUCH

LMAO OMG THANK U FOR COMIC RELIF

TIM SUCKS LMAO stick to the damn piano boy

PATRICK AND SHELAGH GIGGLING OMG MY HEART IS OKAY NOW 😭😭💕💕

SHELAGH AND PATRICK BEING SO CUTE IM CRYING

DAMN THALIDOMIDE

DAMN THAT CAR UGH  

DAMN IT ALL

LOW FUCKING BLOW BERNIE THAT WAS NOT HER FAULT

BABS TRYING TO COMFORT PHYLLIS  IM CRYING AGAIN

SHE IS SO HURT, I AM SO HURT, IM A BLOODY MESS OF TEARS. IM SOBER AND SAD NOW & THERE’S MASCARA In MY CONTACT LENS & MY 3yr OLD GREMLIN LITTLE COUSIN IS KICKING ME (lol he’s laying next to me)

AND CARRIE CRYING NOW OMGGG NO LENNY WONT DIE STOP

“That lovely gp of yours” lol does everyone have a crush on Dr Turner but me? Lol don’t come @ me pls I’m sorry I know people love him 😭😭 Im here for Christopher and Tom But He is handsome, just in an older man way Lmaoo guess it’s cause he could be my dad 😂 lol he’s older than my dad

I’d take him as a sugar daddy real quick though. I need my tuition paid and he is so sweet😏 😭😂

So it was a scarf, hmm I thought trixie was gonna find like stockings or something

“Not Hermès but something very like it” lol how does Trixie know what Hermès feels like on a nurses salary?

Valarie is on my nerves & she’s had like 2 mins of screen time Lmaoo I’ve liked her until this episode. I hope they don’t ruin her for me

“But I’m a member of the institute of advanced motorists”  UGH PHYLLIS IS A GEM WHO DOES NOT DESERVE THIS !! SHE IS THERE FOR EVERYONE ALWAYS, SHE ALWAYS DOES GOOD WHY MUST THIS HAPPEN TO HER?

Aw Sister Winifred

Oh Rhoda 💔💔she’s such a great mother

MY HEART, THEY WERE WALKING AWAY FROM BEING TEASED

BLAME THE RACISTS, IT IS ALWAYS A VALID BLAME

YES PHYLLIS IS A GOOD WOMAN! 😭😭

Tom trying to comfort Phyllis😭😭

“You’re fond of your meat, and our views on God and His existence are divergent to say the least, but we both follow vocations…. so if you caused harm to someone else, even inadvertently would it not make you question what everything in your life has come to stand for?” I’m c r y i n g

“I, a rational woman, have no one to question but myself” 😭💔

IM REALLY HURT

“Sometimes cheering people on the sidelines doesn’t help”

my bby killing it 😍

Why you being a flake Christopher? go ahead man tell her about your kid

BRUH YOU DONT TELL HER LIKE THAT LMAO

he’s divorced ah, thought it was out of wedlock. I don’t care though haha

NO DRINKS FOR TRIXIE, TELL HIM BBY.. in your own time of course 💕

BABY SUSAN SO PRECIOUS

Fred brought her car ugh And Phyllis is still so hurt as am I 💔

This lady is so sweet! I hope she and Rhoda become friends right now

DID SHE TAKE DISTIVAL TOO?

lol wait where are the Turners I miss them??

“.. and the words ‘Nonnatus house this is not a midwife speaking’ are most unlikely to reassure the caller” SISTER MJ!

YES SHE DID OMG. I need them to be best friends omg 💔😭

“Nothing was said, nothing was done” 💔💔

PHYLLIS LOOKING AT THE CAR

SISTER MJ IS GOING WITH HER MY HEART OMG

my heart my heart

aw the mullucks'😭 ofc IT WASNT YOUR FAULT!

SISTER MJ IS A GEM 💕😭 & PHYLLIS IS JUMPING BACK IN

TWO GEMS 😭💕 but also if this was the birth they meant that sister MJ was involved in ill be lowkey sad, but we shall see next week if she’s randomly with Shelagh when she delivers

Trixie serving more looks 😍

Aw my bby 💔does she tell him about her alcoholism at the end of this ?

Also what are we guessing about Valarie rn?? she has a secret? tragic backstory to be unlocked? what ? She gay?

Aw the mulluks’s again! All so sweet💕 & YES LYDIA BE FRIENDS

ugh Christopher looks good af😍 and that car yes

YES TRIXIE 😍 my girl looking good as well

SHE TOLD HIM 😭 IM CRYING IM SO PROUD 😭😭💕💕WHY DO I FEEL SO PROUD FOR A FICTIONAL CHARACTER??! I love her

Oh shit Patsy’s dad is dead. I assumed that was coming

Phyllis reassuring Delia awww

PHYLLIS BACK AT THE CUBS 😭 MY CHAMPION AND SPIRIT ANIMAL BOUNCING BACK

Lenny’s speech omg brb crying

The support group for thalidomide victims omg my heart

I was cryin before and now I’m crying more for this Irish lady

Omg side side side note there was this cute old interracial couple that seem like my parents in 20yrs in JFK yesterday that were so precious and sweet and we’re talking to me the whole time waiting at the gate & then there was this sweet Irish couple who were confused about the time difference and I helped them out and then when we landed they helped me out looking for my bag so now I have much more faith in humanity because usually the people in NYC airports are angry new yorkers who don’t care lol like me (jk)

“There’s no rule of life so simple or so true ..” 😭😢💔💖

Thank u Vanessa I’m so emotional, show me next week 

Bonus: next week

OMG PHYLLIS HUGGING SHELAGH OMGGG. I NEVER KNEW I NEEDED TO SEE THIS

PHYLLIS BETTER DELIVER THE BABY I KNOW I WANTED TRIXIE BUT IT DOESNT SEEN LIKELY AND SO INEED PHYLLIS (sister J too ofc?! She was barely in this past episode)

MY BBY SHELAGH’S TUMMY IS SO BIG IN HER UNIFORM OMG SHE’S SO PRECIOUS I LOVE HER I MISSED HER THIS PAST EPISODE

BUT OH MY GOD BABY TURNER IS COMING HOLY SHIT THIS IS HAPPENING THIS IS NOT A DRILL

HERE COMES THE PILL READY OR NOT #LETSGETIT1962

Lol oh shoot I didn’t take mine yesterday or today brb

AW DELIA

WHAT IS SIGNIFICANT ABOUT BABS SLEEPING I NEED TO KNOW

Lol idk why but even though I like Tom and Babs their relationship just doesn’t do anything for me😂😂 like I don’t give a shit? They’re cute but idk it doesn’t cut it. Like they’re just there and I’m like “aw ok”

OMG I CANT WAIT WHAT WILL HAPPEN ?! I NEED ANSWERS

I will die next week. For real. 

[20lbs2go-blog]

Day 1 out of the hospital

I tried to commit suicide last Friday. Its the first time I’ve almost succeeded really almost died. I slit my wrist with a knife horizontal then diagonal once I remembered its the right way to cut for death. 

Friday I was wide awake at 3am. My thoughts were already racing. Thinking about how bad of a fiancé I am. How I have been neglecting him physically/sexually. Here he is giving me another chance. I was pacing in my house like a crazy person! I felt like I was legit going crazy. My thoughts spinning around, around without stopping, without a break, without a way to escape my mind. I began to think about drinking. I tried watching movies, cleaning, FB, TV, petting my animals to distract my mind. They helped briefly, maybe a a few min then nothing at all. What should I do next? drink. I found some change, drove to the gas station at 9am, totally looked like a suburban mom alcoholic stopping by to get my daily fix. 

I felt guilty driving home. I wanted to start drinking in the car but had a very bad feeling so I waited. I took a drink and went down hill quick. I started bawling. Releasing the pain I felt for putting my family through all of this. Seriously laying on the kitchen floor, sobbing, crying, screaming/yelling and feeling everything. My cat came up to me, I turned my head away. I was down there for a while or maybe 5 min but it felt like a long time. When I got up I grabbed a filet knife thinking its sharp and would be a good choice to cut. I cut, saw the blood, had some release. Seeing the blood come out is like seeing all the emotions flow out. I cut more, began to think about dying, wanting to die. Wanting the ultimate release. I drank the rest in one gulp. It gets fuzzy her. I remember grabbing the phone, calling 911, talking to an officer and I switched. I was cutting to die. 

Is suicide selfish, yes. Do I feel guilty, yes. It is hard for someone to describe however much a person uses words it is impossible to explain. I wanted my mind to stop suffocating me. It feels impossible to get out atm. I felt crazy. How can a crazy person live a life that everyone expects? How can I work when my mind wont stop long enough for me to do my job? How can I be a partner when I do not want to be touched because of my mind racing? I still dont have the answers. 

Threw up 4 times in the hospital. Down to 138.4!! Down 5lbs since I started writing :-D One good thing to be thankful for

Here I am. Day one out of the hospital

https://youtu.be/fbHbTBP_u7U NF Let you down

[hiraethstill]

THIS WEEK ON DAIYA NO ACE (7/30)

SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT!

LIVEBLOG:

mochi... you care so much and i love you

and miyuki does too

BOI AND BOTH OF THEM CARING ABOUT EIJUN AND GETTING HIS MESSAGE

man... im not okay

im n ot okay

god kurami WHY YOU GOTTA ATTACC ME FIRST THING

their cheeky bastard while secretly caring dynamic im

breathes heavily

and making each other feel better through joking

still not okay

furuya apologized? okay okay

lmao furusawa sniping at each other

eijun... maybe part of the reason you are how you are is because you put so much on your shoulders

"the part about you sucking is true" oh dear

asakuki faces always priceless haha

BLESS WATANABE HISASHI

"nabe-san" im SOFT

and ive been told -san is more respectful than senpai sOOO

AWAAH MANAGERSSS

WAIT

OMG

IM

NO

SCREM

AAAAAAAA

NABE-CHAN???????? 

N A B E  F U C K I N G  CH A N ???/??/???

MOCHINABE R I G HT SSSSSSSS

okay but i'm proud of angery child anna and her huge rice ball

they really doin kuki dirty with this animation

HSKDJGH TAKU LMAOO

ah yes masashi i feel this on a spiritual level

wHY IS ASADA SO HECKIN CUTE

whoever's on the mound is ace huh

yess jersey numbers gone

hansom boyos

oh they HAD to put takatsu there...

i live when kurami is in a screen together, which is like always

NABE NO HONORIFIC

HOW MANY BOYFRIENDS DOES NABE HAVE LMAO

"CAN I COME TO YOUR ROOM LATER" lmaooo

I LOVE NORI SO MUCH

ooh pretty eijun shot

NABEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

MIYUKI DAS GAY

NABE COMPLIMENTING SAWAMURA

more pretty eijun

im sobbing, eijun always thinking he doesnt meet expectations and everyone else knowing he outshines them 

COMMUNICATE TO HIM PEOPLE

lmaooo zono

also kurami das gay

MI Y U K I

DAS G A   Y

AAAAA TETSU-SANNNN COME BACK AND NOT JUST IN NARRATION

hiranocchi... are you suddenly kise ryouta, mei?

THAT "WHAT??!!" IM MCFUCKING DYING

lmao miyuki's teacher voice came out

INAJITSU BATTERS DOIN JOBSSS

ITSUKI WTF THAT WAS TOO CUTE YOU'RE BANCELLED

nori pitching for practice!!

yes eijun get in that work

SHKDGJSDG EIJUN'S FACE IN MIYUKIS ROOM

AND WHEN DID ALL THESE PEOPLE GET HERE

oh koushuu

omg teacher miyuki strikes again

tbh i want a fic where miyuki is a teacher...

the pitchers are so :0 and :| idk how else to explain it but they're so focused its so cute

koushuu buddy wyd get in there

I LOVE THE FIRSTIES BEING SO IN AWE OF EIJUN

W

WA

WAI

WAIT

C

CH

CHR

CHRI

CHRIS

CHRIS-SAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN

I MISSED YOU CHRIS-SAN

HE LOOKS EVEN MORE BEAUTIFUL WTFFFF

and miyuki is there on the side too hehehe

god i forgot how lovely and deep and gentle/quiet? chris's voice is

SCREEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMMMM

EIJUN STILL THINKS ABOUT CHRIS-SAN'S WORDS

EIJUN STILL LETS THEM GOVERN HOW HE PLAYS BASEBALL

IM NOT OKAY

CALL THE AMBULANCE I AM  N    O     T OKA Y YYY

C HRISAWA

AND TETSU-SAN OMGGGGGGGGGG

WHYYYYYYYY

TANBA-SAAAAAAAAAN

WAIT tanba's words sound awfully like what kataoka said earlier

who was drawing from who?

"seep deeper" i MIGHT ACTUALLY CRY

"and become a part of me" I AM T HIS FUCKING CLOSE

BREATHES

OKAY

OKAY

beautiful

also itsuki batting great!!

I WAS LITERALLY JUST THINKING "WHEN WILL I SEE MY OTHER INAJITSU BOIS"

ay inajitsu win!

aw man amahisa didnt pitch? :c

best pitcher in japan? somewhere in the bg hongou is laughing his ass off

im sorry that was rude

but hongou really is the best

lmao koushuu "i like the look in your eyes" is gay

HMM.... koushuu wanting to be as candid about his desires

love that in a character

omg blunt as always"your behavior yesterday was quite good" this paired with the thing about desire and liking the look in your eyes screams kousawa rights lmaoo

koushuu bls - don't tell your senpai off damn lmao

harder to read might be harder sure, but eijun doesnt really work that way, no?

"you do rate me" "lets drop everything between us" WHY DOES THIS KEEP GETTING GAYER

KOUSHUU'S IMAGINATION STRIKES AGAIN

THIS GROWL AHAHAHA

"i havent earned the right" okay while this is sweet youre gonna have to catch for him more bc miyuki aint around for much longer so better start earlier

wow pretty

LMAO "WE HAD A REALLY GOOD THING GOING"

koushuu the emo

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

THEY

THEMST

THEMSTDVE

WHERE ARE THE ADOPTION PAPERS I SIGNED LONG AGO

THEYRE SO TINY IM

OH MY GOD

IM LOSING MY GODDAMN MIND

BLUSHY KOUSHUU AND CHEEKY TAKU BUT L I TTLER

THE LITTLE GIGGLE IM DEVASTATED

LITTLE TAKU'S VOICE

hmmst koushuu's mom looks white tbh

half like chris and carlos????

koushuu unbearably cute and i just noticed taku has different glasses, no? wonder what happened to the old ones

wow look at koushuu's grim determined face

and taku's expression... he'd follow koushuu to the ends of the earth im telling you...

damn son that's some face you got thereso dramatic tho pls dont die

taku's little "wuh?" sound when koushuu said he was going to seidou is the Cutest Thing Ever

"kind of??" LMAO

boi... what about nori... and kaneda... and kawashima........ SEIDOU IS INTERESTING PITCHER LAND

SOBBINGGGG OF COURSE YOU CAN ENJOY IT DONT LET THE PAST HAUNT YOU

I LOVE YOUUUU

also highkey all those miyuki shots from koushuu's perspective das gay

SOBSSS YOUR STRENGTH WILL TAKE YOU FAR I SWEAR

preview

YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

ALL THESE KUKI SHOTS

IS IT INTRASQUAD NEXT

IM SO READY IM SO HYPED

SHOW ME ASADA'S CURVEBALL AND KUKI'S PITCHING

AAAAAAA IM SO HYPEDDD

SUMMARY:

kurami Feels

furusawa yelling about who lost bigger

nabe has 238203 bfs

jersey #'s gone

Miyuki's Teacher Voice

EIJUN STILL THINKS ABOUT CHRIS-SAN

ALUMNI CAMEOS

inajitsu win!

KOUTAKU BUT SMOLER

koushuu the Emo Gay

kukis next week!

SEE YOU NEXT WEEK!