#dope as yola

[mobilesuitmidas]

Look at those colors🐍🍃🔥

[futbolpenceresi]

SAIBELER KRALI

HER ŞAİBE ŞAİBE DEĞİLDİR

Fenerbahçe’lilere göre Galatasaray en çok kayırılan takım. Fanatik taraftarların bu şekilde düşünmesi şaşırtıcı değil elbette.

Kahneman’ın bulgularına göre, yüksek görünürlüğü ve etkileyiciliği olan olaylar insanlarda daha çok iz bırakıyor, bu olaylar daha çok hatırlanıyor ve bunun sonucunda insanlar bu tür olaylara gerçekte olduğundan daha yüksek bir olasılık atfediyor.

Bir Fenerbahçe’li için Galatasaray lehine yapılan hatalar daha önemlidir, bu olayların ağırlığı daha fazladır. Çünkü insanlar en çok kendilerine yapılan haksızlıkları farkeder, en çok bu haksızlıklara isyan eder.

Galatasaray lehine yapılan hatalar Fenerbahçeli’leri çok üzer, duygusal ağırlığı ve etkisi yüksektir. Bu olayların hatırlanması diğer bütün olayların önüne geçer. Bu yüzden Kahneman etkisi diyecebileceğimiz olasılık çarpıtması ortaya çıkar. Gerçek ne olursa olsun, Fenerbahçe’liler için Galatasaray lehine yapılan hataların sayısı diğer takımlar aleyhine yapılan hataların sayısından çok daha fazladır.

Geçen senenin son haftalarında Galatasaray aleyhine de hatalar yapıldı. Biri, bu tür hataların birikimi sonucunda oluşturulan Saraçoğlu efsanesinin en azından bir sene daha sürdürülmesini sağlayan Fenerbahçe-Galatasaray maçında verilmeyen %100 kırmızı kart hadisesiydi. Bu hatayla Galatasaray o maçta 2 puan kaybetti. Benzer bir hata başka bir maçta daha yapıldı ve Galatasaray Başakşehir’in arka arkaya puan kaybettiği o haftalarda kritik 2 puan daha kaybetti. Beşiktaş’ın Galatasaray ile oynayacağı maç öncesinde ise ikinci sarı karttan kırmızı kart alması gereken önemli bir oyuncusu derbiden mahrum kalmasın diye ceza almadı.

O kritik haftalarda arka arkaya Galatasaray aleyhine yapılan hatalar olmasaydı Rize maçında puan kaybı önemli olmayacaktı, o maçta yapılan bariz hata da olmayacaktı. Galatasaray aleyhine yapılan hatalar unutuldu gitti, çünkü ağırlığı, etkileyiciliği düşük kaldı. Rize maçındaki hatanın ağırlığı ise şampiyonluğa etkisi nedeniyle yüksek oldu ve kıyamet koptu. Galatasaray aleyhine yapılan hatalarda ise hiç bir şey olmamış gibi yola devam edildi.

Fenerbahçe maçında haksızlığa uğrayarak kaybedilen 2 puan ile Rize maçında haksızca kazanılan 2 puan arasında değer açısından hiçbir fark yok. İki eşittir iki. İkisi de iki puan. Ama yarattıkları infial, bıraktıkları etki açısından aralarında dağlar kadar fark var. Fenerbahçe maçında yapılan hata unutuldu, hiç adı geçmiyor, ama Rize maçındaki hata hiç hafızalardan silinmiyor. Bu birbirini götüren hatalar hiç göz önüne alınmadığı için ve taraftarların taraf olması nedeniyle sadece kendilerine yapılan haksızlıkları kaale alması nedeniyle Fenerbahçeliler için sadece Rize maçında yapılan hata var, ve o hata sezon sonuna yakın tarihlerde gerçekleştiği için şampiyonluğu belirleyen hata olarak görülüyor. Oysa Fenerbahçe maçında yapılan hatanın şampiyonluğa etkisi de aynı. Tek fark o hata sezon ortasında yapıldı ve ligin sonu gelmediği, şampiyon belli olmadığı için etkisiz eleman muamelesi gördü.

Kısacası sezonun başında da yapılsa, ortasında da yapılsa, sonunda da yapılsa her hatanın şampiyonluğa, küme düşmeye, ligdeki sıralamaya etkisi aynıdır. Ama Kahneman etkisi nedeniyle, genelde sezon sonunda gerçekleşen hataların psikolojik etkisi çok daha fazla olmakta o yüzden sonuç(şampiyon, lig sıralaması, küme düşenler, vs) sadece o maçlardaki hatalarla şekillenmiş algısı oluşmaktadır.

Adil bir değerlendirme için sezon boyunca her takım lehine ve aleyhine yapılan hataların net toplamı tabeladaki puana eklenerek sıralama oluşturulmalı, o sıralamayla tabeladaki sıralama karşılaştırılarak hangi takımın hak yediği, hangi takımın hakkının yendiği belirlenmelidir.

Son maçlara denk gelen Rize maçındaki hata nedeniyle daha önce Galatasaray adına yapılan hatalar tamamen unutuldu, ayrıca Rize klübünün o maç için verdiği olağanüstü teşvik de arada kaynadı.

Bu tür olağanüstü teşvikler bazı futbolcuların doping yapmasına, teşvik alan takımın kıran kırana oynamasına ve böylece rakip takım oyuncularının, sakatlanma korkusuyla, performansının düşmesine neden olur. Ayrıca aynı takım diğer şampiyon adaylarıyla teşvik olmadan oynadığı için haksız rekabet ortaya çıkar.

Fenerbahçe’nin Denizli’de 1-1 berabere kalarak son haftada şampiyonluğu Galatasaray’a kaptırdığı senede Kahneman etkisi en yüksek seviyeye çıkmıştır.

O sezon boyunca Fenerbahçe lehine sayısız hata yapılmış, ve bu hataların sonucunda haksız olarak alınan puanların birikmesiyle Fenerbahçe şampiyonluk potasında kalmıştır. O hatalar olmasa Fenerbahçe’nin lig sıralamasındaki yeri üçüncülük ile beşincilik arasında bir noktada olacaktı büyük olasılıkla. Galatasaray da, Denizli’deki teşvik çantası olmadan tamamen şaibesiz bir şampiyonluk kazanacaktı.

Mahfi Eğilmez, Radikal gazetesindeki köşesinde, o sezon yapılan hataları rasyonalize eden bir köşe yazısı bile kaleme almıştı. Sezon içinde yapılan o hataların hiçbirinin, tek başına şampiyonluğu belirlemedikleri için hiçbir önemi olmamış ama o hataların sonucunda elde edilen puanların birikmesiyle son maçta şampiyonluk için sahaya çıkılmıştır. Son maçtaki teşvik çantasıyla kaybedilen maç ise bütün sezondaki lehte yapılan hataların tamamından daha çok ağırlığa, etkileyiciliğe, öneme sahip olmuştur. Son maçtaki teşvik bütün sezonun ayıplarını silip süpürmüş bir de zeytinyağı gibi üste çıkmayı sağlamıştır.

Böylece Fenerbahçe hiç hak etmediği şampiyonluğu kaçırdığı için mağdur olan taraf haline gelmiştir. Oysa gerçek mağdur, tamamen bileğiyle hak ettiği şampiyonluğa son maçtaki teşvik çantasıyla kavuşan Galatasaray’dır. Hem sezon boyunca rakip lehine yapılan hatalar nedeniyle hakkı yenmiş, hem de tamamen şaibesiz kazanacağı şampiyonluğa şaibe bulaşmıştır.

[18-roses]

Lil Haïti Baby by Future

It's that EVOL, ah

You understand me?

I bagged this bad bitch, it was nothing to get her

You want a whole brick? Oh it's nothing to get 'em

Oh, you want diamonds like this? It wasn't nothing to get 'em

I had to focus, then it wasn't nothing to get 'em

Hey, thirty thousand on a watch, I swear thank God I'm ballin'

Feds watching on my spot, they say somebody called 'em

Hottest nigga in the streets, they see my Audemar

Hottest nigga in the streets, three thousands grams a show

Boston, Georgia, I'm with that game, you got that girl that blow

Oh, you want my life, that's la famil, that's all I know

Catch me pissing out the codeine from the night before

This for Khaled, this for niggas 'round the Ace and bottles

This for G-rod, C-Rod, all these niggas banging B's

This the greatest story never told, you gotta see it

I, I got some names but I ain't gon' never drop 'em

Aye, she say my name but she won't ever drop me

You want an R&B chick, shawty it ain't nothin' to get her

You want to run around the town, well it ain't nothin' to get her

You want to drive around in that Rolls, you know it ain't nothin' to get her

You know that I'm gonna make homies ride for me, it ain't nothin' to get 'em

We throwed away that money 'cause that mula swole

I throw that grams of bar, I'm servin' in the cold

Got fifty eight grams of bar, we servin' Peter

They say they got Magnolia, shawty bangin' either

They trapped inside Angola, they was out the NOLA

Then fuck around and then know you, got to be a cobra

They cooped up with that yola, not that good coke cola

I fucked around and showed them that my heart is colder

My water whippin' issues now we packin' pistols

They packin' gats and lots these niggas sending missiles

They say they hate the kid, the kid was gettin' mula

You wanna ask around, then you can ask my jeweler

Buddy came around, he shot 'em on a bike

Oh he poppin' wheelies, a lil Haiti baby

Oh they say that nigga he a lil Haiti baby

Oh they say that boy he just a lil Haiti baby

Shoot in broad day, he shoot in broad day

Shot the whole window up in broad day

Oh that's that lil Haiti baby, Haiti baby

Oh that's that lil Haiti baby, Haiti baby

Dumping down the pills, I feel my head explodin'

Roll a pound of dope, I gotta keep on smokin'

Money comin' in, we ain't gon' never spend it

Ten thousand bags of kush, we ain't gon' never listen

I just wanna be there for my nigga, woo

I just wanna go back to the Bentley store

I just wanna go back to the Lamb' store

I just wanna buy another Rover though

I just wanna get back on a yacht tomorrow

I just wanna buy another spot tomorrow

All this money comin' in, can't never spend it

(I swear) All this money comin' in, we still winnin'

Shoot in broad day, shoot in broad day

Shot the whole window up in broad day

Oh that's that lil Haiti baby, Haiti baby

Oh that's that lil Haiti baby, Haiti baby

Coke in all the cars, we ain't got no facade

Pull up in that 'Rari, we don't know facade

Pull up with that yappa, it was no facade

Lettin' off all the rounds, it wasn't just no facade

Buddy came around, he shot 'em on a bike

Oh he poppin' wheelies, he a lil Haiti baby

Oh they say that nigga, he a lil Haiti baby

Oh they say that boy, he a lil Haiti baby

Shoot in broad day, he shoot in broad day

Shot the whole window up in broad day

Oh that's that lil Haiti baby, Haiti baby

Oh that's that lil Haiti baby, Haiti baby

Dumpin' back these pills, I feel my head explodin'

Jumpin' out these whips, we ain't on no facade

Pull up in that 'Rari, ain't no no Facade

Pull up in that 'Rari, ain't no no Facade

Shoot in broad day, he shoot in broad day

Shot the whole window up in broad day

EVOL

Queen Maxíma of The Netherlands

[karmakazuya]

my favorite youtubers (no particular order)

ImDontai

Jidion

Lofe

Goblin

Dope As Yola

DashieGames

penguinz0

SomeOrdinaryGamers

Jarvis Johnson

Rotten Mango

Mista GG

Kai Cenat

SamFromNJ

Oompaville

Patrick Cc

[galvenporter]

DDG Has Twitter SHOOK After Showing Off His 'Real Voice' - The Shade Room

During the interview, host Dope as Yola brought up speculation he had heard regarding DDG's “real voice.” “We had like 200 people say, 'Ask [DDG] ...

[cdigitalss]

This Is (Probably) The Most Popular Cannabis Content Creator In The World: Meet Dope As Yola

This Is (Probably) The Most Popular Cannabis Content Creator In The World: Meet Dope As Yola

Dope as Yola Courtesy “I recently got deleted off Instagram, again. I had about 4.1 million followers. My Snapchat was number two in the country, not just for cannabis, but in general: It was Kylie Jenner, me and Cardi B. And then they deleted that also. But in terms of sheer numbers online, my watch time is roughly 70 million watch time minutes a month. So I get in a day what some of the…

[lmccannabisyoutube]

Why did Dope As Yola’s YouTube Channel get DELETED? Netflix Show Coming? https://youtu.be/jlasgFGqOsI

[mobilesuitmidas]

Hear me out...this looks fire 🔥🍃

[kaibucha]

🍁 💨

[sweetstonecandy]

WeedTuber Dope As Yola Reminds Us To Get High, Create Something

WeedTuber Dope As Yola Reminds Us To Get High, Create Something   Editor’s Note: Welcome to one of our newest bi-weekly columns, High Folks: the cannabis-infused version of Humans of New York, in which we take an intimate look at people’s relationships with our most beloved plant. The ...

[dopeboy-couture]

Real snowfall

[18-roses]

Watch Lil Haiti Baby on YouTube Music

"Lil Haiti Baby"

Yeah, yeah

It's that EVOL, ah

You understand me?

I bagged this bad bitch, it was nothing to get her

You want a whole brick? Oh it's nothing to get 'em

Oh, you want diamonds like this? It wasn't nothing to get 'em

I had to focus, then it wasn't nothing to get 'em

Hey, 30,000 on a watch, I swear thank God I'm ballin'

Feds watching on my spot, they say somebody called 'em

Hottest nigga in the streets, they see my Audemars

Hottest nigga in the streets, 3,000 grams a show

Boston George, I'm with that game, you got that girl that blow

Oh, you want my life, that's life for me, that's all I know

Catch me pissing out the codeine from the night before

This for Khaled, this for niggas riding on eights and vogues

This for G-rod, C-Rod, all these niggas banging B's

This the greatest story never told, you gotta see it

I, I got some names but I ain't gon' never drop 'em

Ayy, she say my name but she won't ever drop me

You want an R&B chick, shawty it ain't nothin' to get her

You want to run around the town, well it ain't nothin' to get her

You want to drive around in that Rolls, you know it ain't nothin' to get her

You know that I'm gonna make homies ride for me, it ain't nothin' to get 'em

We throwed away that money, 'cause that mula swole

I throw that them of boy, I'm servin' in the cold

Got 58 grams of boy, we servin' pita

They say they got Magnolia shawty bangin' needles

They trapped out Angola, they was out the NOLA

Then fuck around and then know you, got to be a cobra

They cooped up with that yola, now that cook Coke Cola

I fucked around and showed them that my heart is colder

My water whippin' issues now we packin' pistols

They packin' gats and lots these niggas sending missiles

They say they hate the kid, the kid was getting mula

You wanna ask around, then you can ask my jeweler

Buddy came around, he shot 'em on a bike

Oh he poppin' wheelies, a lil' Haiti baby

Oh they say that nigga he just a lil' Haiti baby

Oh they say that boy he just a lil' Haiti baby

Shoot in broad day, he shoot in broad day

Shot the whole window up in broad day

Oh that's that lil' Haiti baby, Haiti baby

Oh that's that lil' Haiti baby, Haiti baby

Dumping down the pills, I feel my head explodin'

Roll a pound of dope, I gotta keep on smokin'

Money comin' in, we ain't gon' never spend it

10,000 bags of kush, we ain't gon' never listen

I just wanna be there for my nigga, woo

I just wanna go back to the Bentley store

I just wanna go back to the Lamb' store

I just wanna buy another Rover though

I just wanna get back on a yacht tomorrow

I just wanna buy another spot tomorrow

All this money comin' in, can't never spend it

I swear, all this money comin' in, we're still winnin'

Shoot in broad day, shoot in broad day

Shot the whole window up in broad day

Oh that's that lil' Haiti baby, Haiti baby

Oh that's that lil' Haiti baby, Haiti baby

Coke in all the cars, we ain't got no facade

Pull up in that 'Rari, we don't know facade

Pull up with that yappa, it wasn't no facade

Lettin' off all the rounds, it wasn't just no facade

Bodies came around, he shot 'em on a bike

Oh he poppin' wheelies, he a lil' Haiti baby

Oh they say that nigga, he a lil' Haiti baby

Oh they say that boy, he a lil' Haiti baby

Shoot in broad day, he shoot in broad day

Shot the whole window up in broad day

Oh that's that lil' Haiti baby, Haiti baby

Oh that's that lil' Haiti baby, Haiti baby

Dumpin' back these pills, I feel my head explodin'

Jumpin' out these whips, we ain't on no facade

Pull up in that 'Rari, ain't no no facade

Pull up in that 'Rari, ain't no no facade

Shoot in broad day, he shoot in broad day

Shot the whole window up in broad day

EVOL

[andhumanslovedstories]

Recent country songs that have made me literally gay gasp as a gay woman, in order of how much they make me want to write an essay on gender and queerness

HONORARY MENTION BUT JUST BECAUSE I THINK THIS IS TECHNICALLY AMERICANA NOT COUNTRY (but genre is fake) AND THIS SONG ISN’T RECENT (2014 and I’ve been listening to it faithfully since then) BUT I ONLY RECENTLY LEARNED IT’S A COVER AND THAT’S MADE ME RECONTEXTUALIZE IT: “Murder in the City” by Brandi Carlile, a cover of The Avett Brothers where she changed the words “make sure my sister knows I loved her/make sure my mother knows the same” to “make sure my wife knows that I love her/make sure my daughter knows the same” which fucking. fucking gets me. Especially since the first time that I heard this song, I assumed it was from a man’s point of view because of that line, and then I learned that Brandi Carlile is a lesbian and I was caught up in my foolish heteronormitivity, and then I learned it was a cover and thought oh okay I guess the song is originally from a man’s pov and it’s cool she covered, and then I learned she changed those lines to make a song that already feels deeply personal to her to explicitly include her love for a woman and the family they’ve made together. And that’s just. It’s all just a lot. 

3) “Fooled Around and Fell in Love” by Miranda Lambert featuring Maren Morris, Elle King, Ashley McBryde, Tenille Townes and Caylee Hammack, because the first time it came up on my spotify, I saw the title and was like “hey dope I like this song” and then I heard the first line was still “I must have been through about a million girls” and I realized none of the words or pronouns were getting changed and I was getting the song I’ve always wanted and deserved: a high production value, high energy, big girl group tribute to being a lesbian fuckboy who Fooled Around And, oops can you believe it, Fell in Love. 

2) “If She Ever Leaves Me” by The Highwomen, sung by Brandi Carlile who is, as mentioned, lesbian, but since I’m apparently still chugging my comp het juice, I was still trying to figure out if this song--a classic “hey buddy keep walking, she’s my girl and she’s not interested” song with an interesting element of the singer being aware the relationship might not last anyway--was gonna be explicitly queer. And then there’s the line, “That's too much cologne, she likes perfume,” and I was like OH HOHOHOHOHOHOHO!!! 

This is immediately followed by the lines “I’ve loved her in secret/I’ve loved her out loud” which is also deliciously queer in this context, with this singer and that juxtaposition, but the line that really fucking got me is my favorite of the song: “If she ever leaves, it's gonna be for a woman with more time.” This is two women in a complicated relationship. This isn’t just a “keep walking, cowboy” song, it’s a song that uses that framework to suggest a whole ass “Finishing the Hat”** relationship, and that’s so interesting to me. Like a song that isn’t just explicitly about two women in love but one that conveys very quickly a rich history between the two of them. And in a genre where the line “Kiss lots of boys, kiss lots of girls if that’s something you’re into” was revolutionary representation.

(Fun fact, “Follow Your Arrow” was partially written by Brandy Clarke, another country lesbian! Another fun fact, so is basically every other good country song. Brandy Clark, please write a big lesbian country anthem, I know it will immediately kill me on impact.) 

To quote one youtube comment, “”lesbians how we feeling??” and to answer by quoting some others, “As a closeted baby gay in the 90s, who was into country, this song would have changed my life”, “I just teared up.  So many happy tears, as a gay woman raised on country music,  this is something that's definitely been needed.  Thank you Brandi. Thank you highwomen”, “This song means more than I can say in a youtube comment”, and “Lesbians needed this song :)”

It’s me. I’m lesbians. 

**ANOTHER HONORARY MENTION EXCEPT IT ISN’T RECENT AND IT ISN’T COUNTRY SO I GUESS THIS IS JUST A MENTION, BUT I AM INTERESTED IN THIS SONG--“Finishing the Hat” by Kelli O’Hara. A very good Sondheim joint, that’s about making art, the costs of its obsessive and exclusive nature and the incomparable pleasure of putting something into the world that wasn’t there before. It’s such a traditionally male narrative that I’m thrilled to find a wonderful female cover of it. I’m not even fussed about her changing the gender from the lover who won’t wait for the artist (except that the shift from “woman” to “one man” sounds so clunky) because there’s value turning this song into a lament of the men who won’t love artistic women. But I do also wish she’d also recorded a version that kept the original gender so it would be gay. OKAY BROADWAY TANGENT OVER, BACK TO COUNTRY. 

1) “Highwomen” by The Highwomen, ft. Yola and Sheryl Crow. I can’t even express the full body chills the first time I heard this. Like repeated, multiple chills renewed at every verse of the song. This really closely parallels my experience with “Fooled Around and Fell in Love” up there, because when I started it I was like “oh dope I know what this cover will be” and then the lyrics started and I was like “OH MY GOD I DIDN’T.” In the case of “Fooled Around” it’s because I was amazed that they kept the original words. In the case of “Highwomen” I fucking transcended because they changed them. 

So I grew up on Johnny Cash, obsessed with a couple of his albums but largely with a CD I had of his greatest hits. (Ask me how many times I listened to the shoeshine boy song. Hundreds. Johnny Cash told me to get rhythm and I got it.) And my FAVORITE was “Highwayman” from the country supergroup he was in, The Highwaymen. The concept of the song is that each of the four men sing a verse about a man from the past and how he died. It’s very good. The line “They buried me in that grey tomb that knows no sound” used to scare the shit out of me. I didn’t expect to have a song that targets so specifically my fear of being buried alive in wet concrete. 

(If you haven’t heard the song, by the way, listen to this version to properly appreciate it as a piece of music. If you have, watch the fucking music video holy shit this is a work of art oh my GOD.) 

So I was predisposed to love this cover before I even heard it. But then I heard it. And they rewrote the song to be about historical women. And it’s like. There’s layers here okay. 

Neither the Highwaymen nor the Highwomen are signing about famous people. This isn’t a Great Man tour of history, it’s about dam builders and sailors and preachers and mothers and Freedom Riders and also Johnny Cash who flies a starship across the universe, as you do. 

In the 1986 version, it’s a song about the continuity of life--the repeated idea is “I am still alive, I’m still here, I come back again and again in different forms.” The highwayman is all the men in the song. He reincarnates. The song is past, present, future. The title is singular, masculine. The same soul, expressed through multiple voices, multiple lives. 

In the 2019 version, the title is plural, feminine. Highwomen. This song is about women. Each verse asserts the same motif as the 1986 version--“I may not have survived but I am still alive”--but there is no implication of reincarnation. Each woman is her own woman. This version has a final verse that the previous versions lacks. The singers harmonize. It’s not a song where one voice replaces  another, the story of this One Man progressing through time. It ends in a chorus of women saying “We are still alive.” 

We are The Highwomen Singing stories still untold We carry the sons you can only hold We are the daughters of the silent generations You sent our hearts to die alone in foreign nations They may return to us as tiny drops of rain But we will still remain

And we'll come back again and again and again And again and again We'll come back again and again and again And again and again 

Another fun fact! The first time I heard them sing “We are the daughters of the silent generations” I died! But luckily I came back again and again and again.  

This is a song about the continuity of history. It asserts that women’s historical lives matter and that they continue to matter, long after they died. This is a song about legacy as well, the legacy of nameless women who worked to protect the ones they loved and make the world better. They don’t die by chance. They are all hunted down by political violence, by racism, by misogyny, for stepping outside their prescribed roles. But, as Yola (who btw fucking CRUSHES THE VOCALS ARE YOU KIDDING ME?????? HOLY SHIT MA’AM) sings as a murdered Freedom Rider, she’d take that ride again. And at the end of the song, she joins the chorus but does not disappear into it. Her voice rises up out of crowd. And the crowd calls itself “we”. These women are united but not subsumed into being One Woman. This is about Women. 

And then, outside the song itself, there’s the history of this song about history. It’s originally by Jimmy Webb and was covered by Glenn Campbell. This cover inspired the name of the supergroup that covered it, the group with Willie Nelson, Kris Kristofferson, Waylon Jennings, and my man Johnny Cash. And it’s like holy shit! What an amazing group to collaborate! Hot damn! 

Then, it’s 2019 and here’s The Highwomen with Brandi Carlile, Natalie Hemby, Maren Morris, and Amanda Shires. The name is obviously riffing on The Highwaymen. Shires set out to form the group in direct response to the lack of female country artists on the radio and at festivals. And they name themselves after a country supergroup, and they put out this song, a song connected to massive names in country music, and they center all of this on women and womanhood and the right of women to be counted in history and to make history and to talk about the ways we have mistreated and marginalized women, in a group that started because one woman was like hey! we’re mistreating and marginalizing women! 

I just think this is neat! I think there’s a lot here we could unpack! But this post is 100 times longer than I was planning and work starts in a bit so uh I’m gonna go get dressed and listen to The Highwomen on repeat for the next hour, “Heaven is a Honky Tonk” is another fucking bop that improves on the original, it would be dope if they’d collab with Rhiannon Giddens, okay byyyyyyyye 

[shotbyshe]

6.3.2020

“Showing up for yourself - How is your mind? (mentally) - How is your heart? (emotionally) - How is your body? (physically)”

Mind:

Well I've been settling my mind recently as I've been editing daily again. I now know what my days have been missing. I have very productive days and feel super fulfilled when I edit. There is just something about formulating a story and piecing it together that makes me feel accomplished. I edit, at the start and end of the day, for myself. I love doing it as a creative outlet but I love doing it for myself, because I am such a fan of me and I love to watch my work.

Heart:

This goes hand-in-hand with my heart. It's what I want to do daily to feed my heart, along with constant communication with my family. Another thing that feeds my heart is music and visual stimulation, aka great movies (this includes series, they are also movies, just short-format). 

Another feed is learning. I make sure to learn something new every day. For the past two months I've been training myself in advanced reading, writing, math and French. Thank God for the internet. It's best for these things. 

It’s important to keep these muscles fresh. Having been out of school for 7 years now it’s easy to lose everything you learned there, if you don’t practice it daily. It’s necessary to enhance yourself further. There is never a time you can’t evolve or should halt improvement of oneself. Willing and able.

Body:

To feed my body I am consistently stretching, napping, and deep breathing throughout my days. I am eating only pure foods that fuel me, give me enough energy to do a full workday along with house work and then my passion projects which are writing, painting and editing.

I haven't always been the happiest during this quarantine but I've been content. I am mostly by myself even when the world isn't in shambles but I know me. I've learned all about Yola. She is dope and she is constantly growing and learning and on a journey of her own to come into herself and to not ever conform.

                                                                                                            -- Yola

[makeyourownmyth]

best heard in 2019.

As usual, same caveats apply as for other categories, and as in past years, but less so with music, because it’s the only thing that I’m still decently up with. That being said, there are some oldies here, and I reserve that right. 

Songs

Honorable Mentions: Lil Nas X - “Old Town Road,” Pop Smoke - “Welcome to the Party,” and Drake (ft. Rick Ross) “Money in the Grave.” 

They were both huge, and I listened to them plenty, I just don’t happen to think they’re very GOOD.

Anti: I try not to shit on any music that’s put out too much, but the second (?) single from Taylor Swift’s album (which is overall quite good!) “Me!” is terrible.

6. Taylor Swift - “Lover” - I love a lot of this album, but this song can get me feeling terribly emotional.

5. Yola - “Ride Out In the Country” - I forget where I even found this song, but it’s such a jam, such a vibe. 

4. Rocket Summer - “Shatter Us” - A band that I got from a middle school kid almost a decade ago comes back with a “mature” album that had some decent cuts, but none that hit as hard as this. It’s true, and powerful, and something that I never would have appreciated at the time when I loved the band way more than I do now. 

3. Grimes - “We Appreciate Power” - She’s crazy, but this is her at her best. 

2. Local Natives - “When Am I Gonna Lose You” - Loved the album, loved this song the most. Put it on a mix. 

1. Tyler and ASAP Rocky - “Potato Salad” - My favorite song of the year, and also, I think, the best song of the year. These guys are 2 of the best right now, and this found them just having fun. We could use more rap like this. 

Albums

Anti: Again, not trying to talk shit on albums that people loved, taste is subjective, yadda yadda yadda, but these were not for me. Thom Yorke’s Anima, Slowthai’s Nothing Great About Britain, Weyes Blood Titanic Rising, and Bon Iver’s i, i. Nothing more to say about them for me, they just weren’t to my taste. I don’t wanna talk about anything Ye-related.

Honorable Mentions

Helado Negro - This Is How You Smile - This is an incredibly fun time. It’s not on your list and I think it’s right up your alley. 

Cautious Clay - Blood Type - The type of album I’d like to listen to more and more. The type of album I think you’ll really like. A weird mish-mash of styles that we never would have thought worked when we were young, but that tends to dominate my lists nowadays. (Steve Lacy-esque?)

Local Natives - Violet Street - Like I said above, I quite like the album, but I didn’t find myself going back to it. 

Harry Styles - Fine Line - Just came out, has one of my favorite songs of the year on it, but I’m not ready to commit to it yet. 

Freddie Gibbs and Madlib - Bandana - Not as good as their last album, but very good example of older person rap done very well. 

J. Robbins - Unbecoming - More people need to listen to this album. It’s awesome, and small, and deserves more pub. 

Solange - When I Get Home - Almost made the cut to the real list, but that’s just due to peer pressure. I liked it a lot, but I didn’t find myself thinking about it incessantly like some of the albums that I place above it. 

Steve Lacy - Apollo XXI - Really, really, really good. I wish more music like this existed and that it was more popular. It feels exceptionally well crafted, like someone who really knows what they’re doing took a lot of time, and did it well. That being said, very little of it STANDS OUT. 

Marvin Gaye - You’re The Man - I actually think this is where my best of list starts, but I feel like I’d be too much of a poser if I put this on there. I listened to this non-stop and I feel like it’s a really good album that not enough people knew even came out, much less listened to. The backstory of it surely plays into that for me, too, but it stands on its own. 

The National - I Am Easy to Find - Genuinely one of my favorite albums of the year from one of my bands of the decade. I’m aghast that it’s not in my top ten, but I had to limit it to ten to make it some sort of real exercise, otherwise it would have just been a random number, which I’ve definitely done in the past, but hate to do when it’s MORE than ten. Less is fine, but more feels like a cheat. I love this album, though. 

Best of the Year

10. Taylor Swift - Lover - Half of it feels like a pure repudiation of Kanye, but half of it is me knowing that I put 1989 on a list in genuine taste, and knowing that this album is full of pop goodness. It’s fun. There are some significant missteps, like “London Boy” and the “Me!” single that sounds even MORE out of place on the album, but overall, it’s really a sign that she knows what she’s doing. 

9. Danny Brown - U Know What I’m Sayin? - He’s done with his childish stuff, he’s making incredible music, and he’s still one of our greatest rappers. Danny Brown feels like the coolest secret that I somehow know a small bit about, but then I’ll see some mainstream pub on him, too, and I’m like, oh, dope, this guy is SUPER well known, like he should be.  

8. Lana Del Rey - Norman Fucking Rockwell! It’s a solid album. I’m shocked at the number of people who are saying it’s the album of the year, but I’ll honestly say, too, that somewhere around the 3 minute mark on “Venice Beach,” when I was first listening, it gets so fucking good that my jaw literally dropped and I was like, oh, I guess LDR is a real musician now. And from that point on, the album continued in a way that pleased and surprised me. 

7. Clairo - Immunity - This was another one that I thought was AOTY material, but stuff just edged it out, so when I said I thought this was a weak year musically, I guess I was wrong. If I’d had a physical copy of this album, I would have WORN IT OUT. It’s probably my most-listened to album of the year, and I love it the way I loved Alex Lahey’s last album, which means I’ll be slavishly following Clairo for years and years now. No regrets. I think she’s got a HELL of a career ahead of her. Just hearing the first chords of “Alewife” gets me hella choked up. 

6. Jenny Lewis - On the Line - I really think if you kick back with this album you’ll find so much to love. The single was really really bad, but it’s the opposite of Taylor Swift: when it arrives on the album, the sequencing honestly makes it seem as though it fits quite well. 

5. Alex Lahey - The Best of Luck Club - This is my token placement, but also a genuine love letter to how huge I think she’s going to be.  (Or maybe how huge I think she should be, but never will be?) I mean, the songs are heartfelt, and it’s that’s so much of what I want nowadays that I had to put her in the Top 5. 

4. Tyler the Creator - Igor - I actually thought this was my AOTY, so making this list it surprised me how far down it fell, but I think that’s a testament to the others as opposed to a knock on this one? I mean, it’s clearly the best album Tyler’s ever made, and the production on it is even better than could have been expected. The fact that he’s changed so much, but is still operating in the wheelhouse that he created for himself (while it’s still evolving!) is proof of the early genius we saw. 

3. Jamila Woods - Legacy! Legacy! This is a killer album. I think it’s the best one, that you’re most likely to enjoy, that you’re least likely to have listened to. 

2. DJ Shadow - Our Pathetic Age - I disagree with all the critics who call it overlong and a slog to get through the first half to get to the better second half. I think the second half is clearly superior, but I quite like the instrumental side.

1. Billie Eilish - When We All Fall Asleep, Where Do We Go? I knew it’d be my favorite when it dropped and that hasn’t changed as the year has progressed. It’s a weird, weird, weird album, especially when I listen to her old stuff and try to reconcile who she is with who she was and who she will be. But I’m cool with that. I mean, shit, she’s 17 and she’s making great art. Keep it coming! 

[mutsuzluktananlamcikart]

Fucking ile lanet olsun arasındaki yazı

Merhaba. Hayatında bazı anlar vardır ya. Küçücük ömründe sırf bunu yaşattığı için Allah'a teşekkür edersin. Cehenneme bile gitsen "Neden?" diye sormazsın hiç. Hatta "Ulan" dersin, "ben ne büyük bir orospu çocuğuyum. Allah'a isyan ediyorum bir de boş boş..." diye kendine sıkarsın kalan mermilerini de. Hem de harakiri yapan samuray onuruyla. Bunu da neden yaparsın biliyor musun? Çünkü biri de seni sever. Sonra o iki kelimeyi duyarsın. Herkese söylenmeyecek derecede kıymetli olan ve her zaman çıkaramayacağın ses tonuyla yapılan duygu boşalmasından bahsediyorum. Öyle önemlidir ki,  hayatının bir anlamı olur. Çok başka hissedersin. Kanser hastası nasıl her anın kıymetini bilirse, sen de o derece bilirsin yaşadığın anın değerini. Çünkü ilktir moruk, yürektendir. Hepimiz yaşamadık mı lan? Herkesin ilk aşk sendromu olmadı mı? Hâlâ o sendromdan kurtulamayan insanlardansan, sadece sen devam et okumaya. Beni en iyi sen anlarsın zira. Aşk dediğin en sevdiğin yemeğin veya içeceğin boğazına kaçıp nefesini kesmesi kuzen. Zor bela kurtuluyorsun ancak yemeye ve içmeye devam ediyorsun. Benim tarifim bu. Senin için ne anlama gelir bilemem. İnsanoğlu sadece tuvalette rahat ve doğaldır. Yaşamak da sıçtıktan sonra dönüp rahatsız olduğunu gizlemek kadar iyidir işte. Gördüğün gibi ben aşk yazamıyorum, hay anasını sikeyim ya. Olmuyor oğlum. Mutlu veya iç açıcı bir tarif koyamıyorum ortaya. Hani bir söz var ya "o kadar bilmem ne ki cümlelerle anlatamam" şeklinde. Ben anlatıyorum da cümleler saçma geliyor. Neyse konuya dönelim. İlk olan şeyler bittikten sonra tekrarı çok iğrençtir. İlki iğrençse ikincisi x2 iğrençtir. Sıçmak fiilinde anlattığım gibi. İşte aynı şekilde gizlersin kendini. Mutluymuş, ilkmiş, içtenmiş ve daha önce hiç aynı cümleleri kurmamış gibi yaşarsın aynı anları. Hepsi 90 dakikalık maçların özet görüntüsünden farksızdır artık. Skoru bilirsin ancak seyretmeye devam edersin. Böyle saçmadır işte. Yazının bu evresinden sonra hemen "Asrın" arkadaşımızdan "Aşk defteri" parçasını açıyoruz. Gaza gelmemiz lazım amına koyim. Normalde saçma gelen her şeyi "sevgili" sıfatı adı altında çok ulvi bir şeymiş gibi yaşıyorsunuz (ruz) ya moruk, ha işte ben o olaya tavım biraz. Devamında da aynı saçma sapan olayları baya bi' insanla yaşıyorsun ve olay iyiden iyiye boka sarıyor. Sonra da Behzat Ç. repliğini alıp "Geçmiyo... amına koydumun dünyasında hiçbir şey geçmiyo" argümanına kendini inandırıyorsun. Bok geçmiyor. Geçmese geberirsin geri zekalı. Diş ağrısı gibi düşün, bıçak yarası gibi düşün. Düşün. Yaradan rabbin adıyla düşün! (Üsstekine ek olarak) Geveliyorum, hiç müdehale etmiyorsun. Neyse. Ben de yaşadım aynı şeyi. Yalnız iki defa oldu. Bizim millet çift dikiş sever ya, ben de sağlam olsun diye çift diktim hayatımı. Kolayca yırtılmasın diye. Üç sene önceydi o doping etkili cümleyi duyduğumda. (Bkz. Seni seviyorum) Abi cidden çok hoş bir cümle lan. Teslimiyet bir bakıma. Duygu teslimiyeti. Yük de diyebilirsin buna, kalbinin sofrasında yer açmak da, paylaşmak da, kendini adamak da... Allah'a dua etme kısmını ben de yaptım. İnanmazsın belki, "Ben bunu hak edecek ne yaptım?" şeklinde de sordum hatta. Çünkü cuma namazına bile gitmiyordum. Yani neyin ödülüydü bu? Daha o günün akşamında ilk uyarı gelmişti vahiy gibi. En sevdiğin adamın ölüm haberiyle aynı gün aşık olmak nasıl bir cinayettir bilemezsin. Belki bilirsin. Duygularını rendeleyen herkes bilir. Sebebi de yine o duyduğun cümlenin başrolünde olduğu filmin bitişiydi. Son sahneydi. Ama ben ayıkmadım olayın ciddiyetini. Nasıl ayıkasın ki lan? Sevgine karşılık var. Hazır yeri gelmişken tüm temmuz aylarının anasını sikeyim bu arada. Ha unutmadan, kimlikteki gizli doğum günümün de takvim yaprağını sikeyim. İnsan hayatında bazı şeylerden emin olmasa da "güven" duyar. Ancak böyle bir dünyada neyin güveni amına koyim? Bak inan bana, insanlara güvenmemen konusunda bir sürü argüman söyleyebilirim sana, ama buna rağmen birilerine güvenmeye devam edersin. Onaylayarak hem de. Kafanı öne eğe eğe onaylarsın. Çünkü mecbursun. Çünük sadece sosyal platformlardaki hesaplarında "kimseye güvenmiyorum" diyebilirsin. Onu da düşen takipçi sayısından yola çıkarak bütün karşılıklı takip ettiklerinin profilini gezerek kanıtlarsın kendine. Bu kadardır dünya, dünyan. Anla moruk anla! Şu dünyada yüklediğimiz her anlam boş. Bomboş arazideyiz. Zamanla saçları dökülmüş bir adam getir gözünün önüne. Dünyanın dökülen saçlarıyız biz de. Biraz da olsa anlıyor musun? Hiç hayal kurdun mu sen de? Birini o hayalin merkezine yerleştirdin mi peki? - Ben yaptım. Yıkılan hayallerin yüzünden bazı şarkılara küstüğün oldu mu? - Benim oldu. Al bu da yaşanılmış en sağlam örnek sana; bir kızım olacaktı. İsmi Gece. Çünkü Ahmet Kaya şarkısında öyle diyordu; "söyle baksın GECE, dağlardan hasretime. Söyle sen neredesin, ben nerede?" İnsanoğlu ya kötüdür, ya mutsuz amına koyim. Ortası yok. "Ama" bağlacı var ya; öncesi virgül, sonrası olumsuz. Öyledir, aşk hikayen de. "Da" bağlacı var ya; ayrı olmak zorundadır, birleşirse yanlıştır. Öyledir, aşk hikayendeki o insan da. Uzun tıbbi terimler vardır ya; gözünle görürsün ama okurken bile dilin dolaşır. Öyledir, aşk hikayende karşı tarafı haklı çıkarmaya çalışmak da. Google Translate var ya; güvenmesen de çeviri yaptırırsın hani, hatta anlamsız şekilde çevirir sana kelimeleri ve düzgün bir cümle kurmaya çalışırsın. Ha işte öyledir, aşk hikayeni ve o insanı anlatırken içinde yaşadıklarını zerre hissetmeyip cümleni bitirir bitirmez, insanların "anladım" demeleri de. İlk başa dön. Allah seni cehenneme atsa, hangi yüzle "Neden?" diye sorabilirsin? İlaçları içelim, yine devam ederiz. Şimdilik bu kadar.

18.04.2020