#dunno how to tag this bitch

[flyswhumpcenter]

How to lose at a card game on motorcycles against someone who can barely draw a card, a guide by Hermann of Team Catastrophe

As you may've guessed from my current profile pic, Yu-Gi-Oh brainrot is in full swing. Love my silly card games and all of the fucked-up shit that happens in it, sometimes.

I think I've seen Duel Monsters, the first series by Studio Gallop, fly past me on whump gif collections, but I've not seen anyone bring up how bonkers with injuries and suffering and shit future series get - for half the waiting time as well!

As you may've gleaned from the title, we're going to talk about 5Ds tonight. Long story short: Yusei is a dirt-poor orphan who drives a cool motorcycle in a dystopian society, he wins at card games, he has a swag birthmark that links him to like 4 other shmucks and they save the world. After Yusei and his friends Jack (the bold blond one with all the memes), Aki (the badass one), the twins Lua and Luca (we love them in this house) and Crow (some guy) save the damn world, they partake in a tournament where they play card games on motorcycles in teams of three. That's all the context you need for now.

Anyway, this is gonna be Long, so grab a snack and a can of whatever beverage you like best, because it's time I tell you about the one time a guy with a sure-fire way to severely injure his opponent lost against a guy with a broken shoulder. Strap in.

Okay, so maybe I'll give some more context

Before we can actually deal with Hermann YGO5Ds being mega cringe, we need to get some info out of the way.

Episode 97 of 5Ds is set right before the WRGP, the competition in whcich our Signers are going to compete. They just founded their team, Team 5Ds (title drop), which is composed of Jack, Crow and Yusei, in this order of who drives when. Feel free to forget said order, we won't need it where we're going.

At this point in the show, Crow just got his super duper dragon, Black-Winged Dragon, after solving a murder by accident. Yusei gets challenged by the smucks at Team Unicorn so they can trick Team 5Ds for their tag duel against them. Sherry says some weird stuff and drives away in French. Jack and Crow visit their orphanage and chat with their foster mom Martha. Kids Crow takes care of encourage him to do his best in the upcoming WRGP. Gee, that'd be too bad if something happened to him!

Anyway, something happens to him when going on a morning drive on Dah Motorcycle after some spooky mysterious malfunction locks the Blackbird's wheels.

woops, jinxed it.

Kind of like a bird who'd smashed head first into a window, or a stick of butter let loose in a supermarket, Crow slides on the ground. He doesn't lose consciousness, but when he tries getting up, he quickly realizes putting his right hand on the ground hurts like a bitch and - woop would you look at that.

Yeah that don't look too good.

That's only the start of our issues, however, because soon enough, ay hope Crow could've had of this being just a big-ass bruise gets smashed into the ground.

In a surprising amount of realism from a series about people playing card games on motorcycles and occasionally fighting off gods on motorcycles while still playing card games, the doctor stares at our guy and say "yeah uh that's gonna take a month to fully heal". Problem, WRGP preliminaries are in, like, three days, so Crow goes into panic mode and goes through three stages of grief at once. Y'know, denial, anger, bargaining, anger again, sadness.

TL;DR this "I don't need a cast" claim isn't going very well.

Team 5Ds is left scrambling because, without a third driver, they're at a disadvantage of 8K Life Points in total against 12K for a full team. Aki, who recently got her Turbo Duellist:tm: licence, decides she's gonna be their second wheeler. Crow, who initially sulks, sucks it in and decides to train Aki instead.

And this is how we got here... unless?

Sabotage? In my card games on motorcycles tournament? It's more likely than you think!

We skip ahead to episode 104 now. Team 5Ds has won against Team Unicorn thanks to the power of Yusei's plot armour and protag swag, and now, they're bound to go against Team Catastrophe, who are no-name criminals from Satellite, the former slums Yusei, Jack and Crow all grew up in. Oh also Team Unicorn's Andre and Jean fucking crashed against Catastrophe, that's kind of a big deal I guess.

After watching the local main antags do antag stuff, we cut to Yusei and Bruno (Team 5Ds' mechanic, forgot to mention him until now, woops) at home doing stuff on the bikes. Crow comes back from the hospital for a routine checkup. When asked abot his shoulder, he proves to be as trustworthy with the sentence "I'm fine" as Yusei "haha shrapnel in my abdomen is no big deal" Fudo:

Our guys are soon discussing what happened with Breo, at which point Carly (sweet, shafted Carly) provides them with vital info about what happened in the form of duel footage: during Team Unicorn's duel with Team Catastrophe, there was a monster named Hook, the Hidden Knight on the field both time a crash happened. The gang quickly connects the dots with what happened with the Blackbird. Conclusion: somehow, those Catastrophe guys can lock their opponents' rear wheels and it looks to be related to Hook.

And then it happens again, this time to Aki.

So, things are kind of bad. Aki's mega down for the count, there're criminals on the loose, and Crow's this close to just beating them up (with only one arm, yes). With a single, piercing gaze, Yusei convinces him to just face them like a true man: in a card game. Crow takes that as a hint that, actually, it's his job to do. Jack is like "what the hell are you doing bird brain" while Yusei is just. marveling at the sight of medical equipment without child safety locks.

Crow vows revenge, and eyecatch.

Can you be complicit in painful driving? Asking for a friend.

It's the day of Team 5Ds VS Team Catastrophe! Everyone's excited and Officer Ushio, the only good cop ever, wants to take that whole sabotage thing to the authority - but Breo tells him no, actually, he should let th ebunch of 18-to-20-yos take care of it, to avenge Andre and Jean or something. (To be exact, Jack is 20, Yusei is 19, and Crow is 18. wait crow was a minor in the dark signers arc?)

Team Catastrophe gets boo'd, Team 5Ds gets a solid round of praise, I try to ignore how Carly and Mikage have been reduced to Jack Atlas fangirls and - oh.

Crow walks up to them to clearly announce he's here to get revenge for Aki, and Andre, and Jean, and himself too. Hermann (of Team Catastrophe glory, it's the guy on the right) taunts him on his physical condition, Crow smirks, and tells them he knows what they're playing. The guy not on the picture is like "shit they're sussing us out", Hermann scoffs it off.

The first round sees Hermann and Crow facing off. This absolute banger of a sentence is said:

Meanwhile, in Team 5Ds' pit, Luca's worried about Crow, since his shoulder hasn't healed fully yet. Jack tells them Crow's a stubborn bastard and wouldn't take no for an answer, Lua has no fear in his heart whatsoever and Yusei doesn't add anything before the duel starts.

As always in Riding/Turbo Duels, the first turn is determined by who can close the first corner first. It's already not going well for Crow.

Nonetheless, shonen shit gets said.

Hermann quickly understands what's going on with his opponent and goes for the kill right off the bat.

Fairly logically, Crow loses most of his balance and, most importantly, the first turn.

For the needs of this just not being Yugipedia's duel description from this episode, I'll make actual duelling details short. What's important here is that Hermann summons "Hook, the Hidden Knight", and defeating it is a pain in the ass for Crow due to his Monster Effect.

What's more important to us, and will explain the title of this post, is that it's not just shoving your arm right into Crow's shoulder that'll make him grit his teeth in pain - even drawing a card is enough.

So is drawing a card, actually. I'm no gif maker, so I can't show it animated, but his hand jerks when just putting "Blackwing - Sirocco of the Dawn" on his field.

Yeah, that's gonna be a long one for our bird guy.

Anyway, whenever "Hook, the Hidden Knight" uses its effect, Shadow Hook, this happens:

This duel is also a lot of Crow evading one (1) hook that's somehow made out of solid shadow, so ths is going to be the sole time I show this. Episode 104 ends on this, so onto the next episode we go.

Formula 1 forces you to do pit stops even if you're Max Verstappen, but this doesn't apply to Riding Duels I guess

Episode 105 greets us back to Crow understanding the ugly-ass monster in front of him is what's attacking all those people. Right on cue for his shoulder to mess with him again!

Now painfully aware he needs to make this duel short, he sets his entire hand on the field and ends his turn. This is what clues Jack and Yusei on the fact their foster brother is really not doing so hot.

Hermann takes his turn. Of course, Hooky Hook attacks again, so that means Crow has to go on dodging duties, which triggers more pain in his shoulder (the animation is recycled, so no point in showing it here). The MC doesn't suspect the Shoulder Inquisition, so he wonders if the Blackbird isn't going insane. Hermann sets a card and ends his turn.

Crow is once again left to wonder how n the hell what's happening to him is even possible, but he's cut off in his thoughts by - you guessed it.

Jack, who like last week was dragging his bleeding ass to the pit stop after crashing against Andre of Unicorn (a whole grandiose moment of 5Ds that was too), declares this:

Jack asks Lua to ask Crow to make a pit stop; and that's the boy does. He screams "yo, dude, stop for now, I'll take care of it". Crow replies that, no, he'll destroy that monster first. And so he drives by the pit lane and that's it.

Yusei's opinion on the matter is that everyone needs to trust in their friend, while Jack declares in the most tsundere way possible he won't be hold responsible for what happens to his pal. Don't be fooled, tho, drawing a card is still a literal pain for Crow.

Crow takes his turn. Duelling happens, with him coming prepare for Hook's effect, but not Hermann's other Monster's effect. Still, he manages to deal 2000 LP of damage after taking 1600 himsel, from Hook's Effect activating twice. This time, however, when Shadow Hook activates, he has to straight up jump in the air to evade the hook, so he has to land - and yeah that hurts, big fucking oop.

To make a long story short of the last turn in this duel, Crow summons his new ace Black-Winged Dragon, kills off Hook, reduces Hermann's LP from 2000 to 0, but Hermann wants to keep the damn thing on the field. Crow's forced to active "Gravity Collapses", a Trap card that sends a Synchro Monster on his field to the graveyard in exchange for the negation of that second summoning. Activating the trap hurts tho woops, but he must be fast, cuz that thing is coming for him.

"Gravity Collapses" does its thing, Hermann's finished, no more Hook shenanigans to come. Revenge taken, Monster beaten, time for adrenaline to run off.

And so, with still 800LP remaining, Crow takes his pit stop, finally. Yusei and Jack both rush to him, and the faces their brother makes when taking off his helmet and passing the baton to Jack are quite a sight to behold.

So, I ran out of pictures for this post (woops), so just know Jack beats the ass of Catastrophe's second wheeler so bad they have to forfeit. Then the plot kicks in again. Crow gets to sit a bit of it out because his shoulder is, actually, still a source of pain.

And so this is how you too can lose to someone with a broken shoulder despite having a weapon. Good grief.

[moonstandardtime]

i want to put link in isat. im sure hed do fine. the heros spirit endures

[front-facing-pokemon]

Now i know this blog is obviously for.. well. Front facing pokemon, but your tags are always super interesting. I think your opinions on pokemon are pretty neat

i've gotten a few asks like this so far, and it's always nice to see that folks aren't annoyed about how much i talk in the tags. i have lots of opinions on lots of things! and i like to talk a lot. the reason i started talking more in the tags is actually because of asks like this—folks saying they liked seeing what i had to say on particular pokémon has encouraged me to actually talk about my thoughts more (although if you regularly read my tags, i tend to get off-topic pretty quickly. i queue these up very early in the morning, as soon as i get up, and i'm usually a little delirious), especially compared to my first early posts on this blog which didn't even have any tags at all, beyond the names of the pokémon. you're one of the like 4 ffp-mod likers how's it feel

[misfortunegirl]

bro i really am just.

😀

i am just fucking sitting.

[rexscanonwife]

Sure there's the countless atrocities he committed, but he can play piano! 🥺🥺

[tilapiamafia]

God I fukkin hate Instagram

[boy-above]

j/hn wolfe make one video without complaining abt ur audience challenge

[eggsnatcheskneecaps]

My inner child doesn't need that bitch teacher who abused/bullied me from 1st to 4th grade to die I need her alive so I can openly criticise her and call her a shitty teacher to her face I think that'd make her spontaneously combust

Unfortunately she died when COVID started (unrelated) so that ship has sailed

[damseiindistress]

we need to be nice to mink fans and by extension mink himself or else im going to start becoming evil

[a-s-levynn]

random confession time, i need a mental hygene moment

when i say i’m tired ‘cause i had a bad night i don’t mean i had a hard time falling asleep, it neither means me having bad dreams or just randomly waking up in the middle of the night. that’s my usual sleeping experience. i refer to nights like yesterday, waking up with a dislocated finger.

[pvtchurch]

Nasser al-Attiyah (rallye, Dakar) vs Jaume Masia (Moto3)

Nasser al-Attiyah Nominations: 1 no bio for him either BUT he won the paris dakar FIVE TIMES? AND he's an olympic athlete? you go girl!!!

Jaume Masia Nominations: 1 (whoever this is I admire your dedication) "Firstly his face, he has a bad bitch face, he's an aggressive rider who has, and will fight in the gravel trap after a crash (Valencia 2022). Also, in 2021 he was an awful teammate to Pedro Acosta, who was fighting for the Championship. He wouldn't give the slipstream, despite Pedro giving them to him, and he would battle super hard with him in races. Then he would act super friendly afterwards, he's a bad bitch and he knows it."

[sanguineterrain]

restroom attendant | jason todd

Summary: Tonight is the worst night ever--you just got dumped on your birthday, and all you want to do is cry in the restaurant bathroom in peace. That is, until, the Red Hood bursts in. This city just won't cut you a break.

Pairing: Jason Todd x fem!reader 

Word count: 1.7k

Warnings/tags: humor, mild angst, reader's ex-bf cheats and dumps her, jason is such a silly goose, flirting, meet ugly, canon-typical violence, awkward jason, comic relief dick grayson.

A/N: this is probably the silliest fic i've ever written LOL! i hope you guys enjoy it. please support your local jason todd enthusiast and reblog :)

the divider

Tonight sucks. 

With a shaky hand, you attempt to soothe your swollen eyes. You’ve probably been in here for about twenty minutes. Your Uber has definitely left, as has your now ex-boyfriend of three years. 

Yoga instructor. It’s always the yoga instructor. They’re always fucking the yoga instructor.

You swallow a mouthful of tears and phlegm and try not to let the wet sink touch your dress. All you’d wanted was a little class on your birthday, maybe have some wine and play footsie under the table with your boyfriend. But no. That would’ve been too easy for you. 

You’re starting to think this city is cursed.

The door slams open. The force of it shakes the bathroom, rattles the mirrors. You spin around.

A man slides across the floor and smacks his head on the opposite wall. Red Hood appears in the doorway, the eyes of his helmet glowing eerily. 

Yep. Definitely cursed.

"Let's try this again," Hood says pleasantly, reloading his gun with a fresh magazine. "And in the interest of making myself transparent: when I ask you a question, Jerry, I expect a truthful answer."

He stalks over to Jerry and heaves him up by the lapels of his suit jacket. Hood's biceps bulge as he holds Jerry against the wall. You squish yourself against the sink. Water soaks the back of your dress. 

"You're crazy, I didn't do anything!" Jerry shouts, feet barely scraping the floor. 

"Volume, Jerry. People are trying to enjoy their meals.”

“Let go of me, Hood! I wasn’t anywhere near the Iceberg Lounge!”

“Yeah, see, words are coming outta your mouth, but they don't match the fact that I have three people who put you at the scene. How can we remedy this inconsistency? Any ideas?"

Jerry squirms, but he's no match for Hood's strength. Your heart pounds in your chest.

"Don't give me to the cops!" Jerry begs. 

"Cops are the least of your worries right now," Hood snarls. "You're damn lucky Nightwing wants to talk to you, Jerry, or your head would hurt a lot more."

Slowly, you reach for your purse, trying to pull out your phone. Instead, you knock it to the floor. Tears gather in your eyes because this night just can’t cut you a break.

“Motherfucker,” you whisper. 

Hood turns, those frightening white eyes now on you. Jerry also looks at you, legs still dangling.

“Hey,” Hood says without a sign of struggle. “Shit. Y'alright? Did I swipe ya?”

“No,” you say, voice shaky.

His posture softens. “Okay. I’m not gonna hurt you. Don’t be afraid.”

“I believe you. But, um… you're in the women's bathroom.”

Red Hood gives the room a onceover. 

“Huh. So we are. Dunno how that happened.” He shakes Jerry by the collar. “Why’d you run into the women’s bathroom, asshole?”

“I'm sorry, I'm sorry! Don't kill me!” Jerry wails. 

“Shut it, Jesus. I'm not gonna kill you. Not yet, anyway.” 

“It's fine, I was just leaving,” you say, bending down to get your purse. 

“Hey, no, don't let me push you out,” Hood says. “Sorry. I'll be gone in a couple minutes.”

Hood adjusts his grip so Jerry's face is against the wall, arms and legs restrained. Then he zipties Jerry and sits him down hard on the floor. Hood presses a button on his helmet. 

“Yo, N, I'm at Prescott's. Yeah, with Jerry. No, I didn't tell him to run in here, he did that all on his own! Well, I chased him for ten blocks, so I’d prefer if you’d keep your bitching to yourself. Thank you… Okay, we're in the women's bathroom, so—well, I didn't do it on purpose! No, I’m—will you just come here? There’s a side window.” Hood presses the button again with a grunt. “Dickhead.”

“Are you gonna erase my memory?” you ask. 

Hood jerks, turning back to you.

“What? Hell no, I'm not gonna erase your memory. I don't do that shit, I promise.”

You slump against the sink. “That's too bad. I would prefer it.”

He looks up from Jerry’s last ziptie and pulls it extra tight. Jerry whimpers. 

“How come?” Hood asks.

You shake your head. “It's nothing.”

“Hm. Doesn't look like nothing. If you're in danger—”

“I'm not in danger. I…”

You glance at Hood. You can't see his face, but his body language seems genuine. From what you've heard, Hood isn't known for mincing words or doing things he doesn't want to. And he’s good to Gothamites. Well, the law-abiding ones, anyway. He’s even been endorsed by Batman.

What's the harm in telling him about your disastrous night? Not like you'll see him again. Or Jerry. 

“I got dumped,” you say. 

“Ah.” Hood nods. “Been there.”

Somehow, the idea of Red Hood getting dumped is weirder than him beating up a guy in the women’s bathroom of Prescott’s.

You sniffle, and wipe your eyes with the back of your hand. 

“Yeah, um. It was our three year anniversary today. He took me here, told me he was in love with his yoga instructor, and then left.”

You tear up thinking about it. Hood makes a quiet noise.

“Shit. Well, I haven't been there,” he says. “But I know infidelity. I'm sorry. Dudes are trash.”

“And it's my birthday today,” you blurt, sniffling. 

“Happy birthday,” Jerry says, clutching his stomach. 

“What a fucking asshole!” Hood snarls, and lets go of Jerry, who crumples like a sack of potatoes. He’s out cold in a second, frozen on the floor.

Your brows rise. “Is he okay?”

“He’s fine. It’s his first time in Gotham.” Hood shrugs. “Anyway, where was I? Right, your asshole ex. Like it's not enough to publicly dump you, and then he goes and does it on your birthday? Who is this guy? I'll go talk to him right now.”

You laugh a loud, snorting laugh. It bounces off the tiles. 

Hood tilts his head. “What’d I say?”

You catch your breath and wave your hand. 

“No, nothing, I’m sorry. I’ve just had a crappy night and that’s probably the nicest thing anyone’s ever offered to me.”

“I mean it,” Hood says. “I’ll scare him if you want.”

“As tempting as that is, I don’t want to be an accessory to a crime.”

You also don’t want to put your ex in the ICU, no matter how much he might deserve it. Best to let the universe do its thing.

“You’d be acquitted, don’t worry.” Hood leans against the stall. “I’d never letcha go to jail.”

You smile, your ears growing warm. “You don’t even know me. What if I deserve it?”

“Nah. I got a good sense about people. I can tell you’re sweet. Probably don’t even run through red lights.”

“I try not to,” you say, heat spreading to your face. 

“Yeah, a good girl. I figured as much.”

Your eyes widen. Hood coughs and rubs his neck. Even his coughs sound intimidating through the helmet, but that’s negated by his scrunched-up posture.

“Fuck. Sorry. That wasn’t a come-on,” he says. “I mean, it sounded like one, but I’m realizing what a creep I am, flirting with you in a bathroom with a zip-tied criminal. Sorry.” He shakes his head. “I hate myself.”

You grin. “It’s okay. You made my night better, actually. Thanks.”

“That’s a testament to how terrible your night’s been if I made it better.”

You shrug. “Could always be worse. I bet Jerry had an even shittier night than me.”

“You’d win that bet. But I—”

The window swings open with a clunk. Nightwing pops his head in. He looks at Hood, then you. 

“Uh,” he says. “Evening. What’s going on?”

“What’s going on is it took you almost ten minutes to get here,” Hood says, back in Vigilante Mode. “Did you get lost?”

Nightwing smiles with all his teeth. “I was actually cleaning up your mess at the Bowery, Hood. You’re welcome.” 

He looks at you. “Hi. Sorry about this. I hope we didn’t ruin your night. If there’s anything we can reimburse you for…”

You shake your head. “It’s okay. My night was already sunk. Don’t worry about it. Thanks for keeping Gotham safe.”

Nightwing laughs. “The pleasure is ours.”

“Alright, enough chattering, Dickwing,” Hood says. “Take him.”

He lifts the unconscious Jerry, pushing him up to the window. He does so effortlessly, his jacket riding up to reveal his skin-tight jumpsuit. 

You look away before he catches you staring. There’s definitely something wrong with you. 

Nightwing takes Jerry and waves at you. Then he disappears.

“So, uh,” Hood says. “I gotta go.”

“Oh! Right, of course. Sorry to keep you.”

“Now what’re you apologizing for?” he asks, and it almost sounds like a tease. You wonder what his smile looks like. What color his eyes are.

“Well, I really didn’t mean to keep you…”

“You didn’t keep me,” Hood says, and you can hear the warmth even through his decoder. “This is probably the best arrest I’ve ever made.”

He starts to climb through the window, then stops. He digs into one of the pockets of his belt and pulls out a scrap of paper. 

“This is my number,” he says. “Well, it’s kind of the vigilante hotline. But you can reach me here, in case you ever need help.”

Hood walks over to give it to you. He smells like gunpowder and oranges. He’s even larger this close, the width of his shoulders dwarfing you. 

“Thank you,” you say quietly. 

He nods and backs up, clapping his hands.

“Right. So I’ll go… Bye.”

Hood looks at you for a moment more. Then he hops up onto the window sill and slides out, somehow graceful despite his bulk. The window closes. 

Your dress has dried, which is nice. You walk out of the bathroom. It’s a miracle no one else has come in. 

You get your coat and this time, when you see the empty seat across from yours, you don’t burst into tears, which is progress. You call another Uber and go to wait for it at the front. The hostess approaches you.

“Ma’am?” she says, and holds out a small, plastic container. In it is a slice of tiramisu. 

“I didn’t order this,” you say.

“It was called in and paid for by a Mr. R.H. He wishes you a happy birthday.” 

“Oh. Thank you.”

You’re definitely leaving a five-star review on Yelp.

[alastor-x-reader-stories]

To Rate a Hug - part 1 of ?

Tags: Alastor x Reader, Lucifer Morningstar x Reader, Humor, Antics, Fluff, Hugs, Reader is cat-like, shenanigans, Lucifer is a dork, Alastor is a petty bitch

part 2

“Who, in this room, is the most huggable?” Charlie asked, grinning ear-to-ear.

Your ears twitched, tilting your head at the question. “What?”

The residents of the Hotel were playing Truth and Dare as one of the redemption activities. Something about it being a good thing to be true to yourself and others? It was originally ‘Truth or Truth’ but Angel Dust complained saying if they had to play this game at all there should be a dare option.

You, being the hotel’s very own scaredy cat, only went with the Truth option. Charlie grinned, vibrating in her seat.

“Who’s the most huggable person in the room?”

You blinked. “Specify.”

“Huh?” The princess said “Um. I. What?”

“Do you mean who do I think would physically give the best hugs, who do I want to hug personally, or like, who I think is most likely to give me a hug?” You said, rocking a bit in your seat.

“Oh! All three?”

“Ok. Um.”

You scanned the room. Charlie was vibrating with excitement, waiting for your answer. Vaggie was watching Charlie more than you, a soft smile on her face. Angel Dust struck a pose, kicking one leg up in the air and shooting you a wink. Husk was pretending he wasn’t there. Nifty wasn’t paying much attention either, flitting about dusting and the like. Alastor hadn’t bothered looking up from the book he was reading and Lucifer… was staring right at you, vibrating much the same way his daughter was.

The Morningstars were so cute.

“Um. Okay, no judgement, though?” You said, grinning sheepishly.

“Of course, of course!” Charlie said with a smile, waving away your concerns.

“Wouldn’t be judgin’ ya unless ya told us who you wanted to f-“

Vaggie whapped Angel Dust over the head with a rolled up newpaper before he could finish that sentence. She sat back down and smiled.

“Go ahead, hun.”

“Okay…” you hummed, pretending you never thought about this before in your entire after life. You had. But that’s an embarrassing thing to mention so you pretended you didn’t.

“I’d say who seemed the best at hugs, physically, would be Husk.”

The cat’s ears twitched.

“Who I’d want to hug personally would be Alastor.”

One ear flicked to point in your direction.

“And I think Charlie’s most likely to hug me.”

“You’re right!” Charlie grinned, squishing you into a hug immediately and just as quickly letting you go. “I do love to give hugs!”

You chuckled, ears laying down bashfully. “Yeah, um, okay. Who’s next?

“You spin it, toots.” Angel said, shoving the bottle from Charlie to you. The group was using an empty wine bottle as the decider, and now it was your turn. You spun it and it landed on Lucifer.

“All right, Luci. Truth or dare?”

He jumped a bit like he forgot he was participating. Rubbing the back of his neck, he looked to the side and thought the floor was a lot more interesting. “Er. Truth?”

You hummed, tapping your claw against your chin. “Ooookaayyyy… Um. What’s your favorite color of the alphabet?”

“Well-“ He stopped mid-word, blinking one eye at a time. “….What.”

You cackled, unable to help yourself. “Well?”

“Answer the question, yer majesty!” Angel chimed in.

“Yeah, Dad!” Charlie said.

“But- What- how do I- I dunno, the number 5???”

You nodded sagely. “Good answer.”

“’Eh, I prefer-“

“Angel, I swear to heaven and back if you say 69 I’m going to rip your limbs off.” Vaggie growled.

The spider shrugged “I was gonna say 420, actually.”

“Ha! Weed.” You grinned. You’ve never actually touched the stuff because it smelled gross but it was fun to joke about.

Lucifer sighed and gave the bottle a spin. It landed on Husk.

“Right, Bar Cat, Truth or Dare?”

“I have a name, your majesty.” Husk snorted. “And. Dare.”

Lucifer grinned “Hee hee hee, okay. I dare you to… make me a drink!”

Husk rolled his eyes. “Coming right up.” He got up and left, then returned with a drink he passed to the king and sat himself back down, giving the bottle a lazy spin.

The old cat was really good at the art of misdirection. So if he carefully stopped the bottle with the very edge of his tail no one would notice. Except Alastor. But he didn’t mention anything because he wanted to see where this would go.

After all, he had it land on you.

You sighed, rocking a bit in your seat. “Truth.”

“Not even gonna consider a dare?” Angel said with a huff. “Kinda boring.”

You stuck your tongue out at him. He flipped you off. Life continued.

Husk sighed, leaning against his hand and humming as though he didn’t already know his question. “Ok. I guess… Why would I be the ‘best at hugs’?”

You sunk a bit in your seat. “Um. Well. Your fur looks soft…”

Alastor’s ear twitched again.

“…and you got those big ol’ wings.”

Lucifer found the wall interesting all of a sudden.

“…and you just kind of look like a care bear.”

Angel Dust burst out laughing. Husk’s ears went back, eye twitching. “Ex-fucking-scuse me?”

You ducked your head “I didn’t- I’m sorry I didn’t mean anything bad- I-“

Husk deflated, rubbing his face. “Right, right, m’bad.” He still looked irritated but managed to get his voice to sound indifferent. “…Why do I look like a care bear?”

“The hearts.” You said meekly, pointing a claw at him. “You have hearts in your ears, little hearts for your eyebrows, and your nose is shaped like a heart, and you have hearts on your hands.”

“…You know, they’re right.” Vaggie said, glancing over at the old cat. Charlie cooed.

“I never noticed that before!”

“I did!” Nifty chirped, scuttling on top of the table. “I did I did I did!” Her eye narrowed, pointing her feather dust threateningly at all those in attendance “But no one listened to Nifty.”

“Who’s Nifty?” You said with a shit-eating grin. The small little goober’s eye widened, surprise and wonder crossing her face.

“I’M Nifty….” She hummed, tapping at her chin.

You nodded sagely. “You are Nifty.”

…

“All right I’m done.” Husk said, pushing out of his seat and leaving. Charlie sighed. She thanked everyone for showing up and participating and the various people in attendance left for their own rooms.

You scurried off as soon as Charlie said you were done for the day and curled into your bed happily. Sweet, sweet privacy. Away from prying eyes-

“Hello there!”

You screeched, fur floofing up to the point you just looked like a puffball with eyes.

Alastor cackled. You crawled under the blankets to hide from him. Alastor was under the blankets with you, grinning. You flailed again, scrambling off the bed and darting underneath it. Guess where the fuck Alastor was.

Several more repeats of that later and you were laying face-down into your pillows with the Radio Demon standing over you.

“Well, that was amusing!” He said.

“I’m glad you had fun.” You muttered.

“I did, I did! Now, a question.”

“And now, an answer.”

“Very good. So. Earlier you had said that you wanted to hug me?” He leaned further towards you, quirking an eyebrow. “Why?”

“To annoy you, mainly.” You said flatly. Static surged. You flinched, ducking back under the blankets. There he was again, sitting on your bed with his legs crossed, eyes glowing brighter in the makeshift blanket fort. He had his hand on your back before you could dart again, keeping you in place.

It wasn’t forceful, though. You could sliver around if you wanted. What was awkward was how close he was to you now. Eyes shining in the dark, breath warm against your face, the smell of his cologne in your nose. And those fluffy ears squished slightly by the blanket.

The Radio Demon had no business looking so huggable.

“Now was that really the reason?” He said, eyes lidded. “From your reaction to our close proximity, I feel as though you were simply teasing me.”

“Partially.” You said. “I mean, yeah, it’d be partially to annoy you. But overall you just kind of seem really…huggable.”

He rose an eyebrow “Huggable?”

“Yeah?” You snorted “That’s what the question was about?”

Alastor leaned closer, voice dropping an octave as he purred “Absolutely nothing else you were thinking about?”

“Well now I’m thinking you need a lozenge.” You said, pushing him back “Voice sounded a bit hoarse there. And before you ask, no, I’m not that stupid and I know what you’re implying. But really that’s it.  You just seem really huggable.”

“How so?” He asked, voice thankfully back to normal.

Alastor had just been messing with you the moment prior. Usually those kinds of comments lead to certain kind of things. Though he would never partake in those ‘things’, the reactions of those who found him attractive were very entertaining. This just confused him.

You shrugged. “I dunno? I just look at you and go ‘mmm yep that’s a huggable person alright’. I mean. Assuming you didn’t hurt or kill me.”

“Oh, I might.” Alastor grinned. Your flight-or-flight instincts kicked in and you jerked back, being stopped again by Alastor’s hand. The instinct kicked in a second time when your face was suddenly pressed against his chest, a deep chuckle reverberating through him. “I jest, my dear.”

“You’re the deer.” You said. He chuckled again. “So. Uh. Is this permission to hug you…?”

“Ha! No.” He shadow-traveled out from the blanket fort and the thing crashed down on you. You reacted to this startling by running straight off the bed into the wall. Alastor’s cackle echoed in your ears as you de-tangled yourself from your blankets. You shot him a peeved look before gathering up your bedding and making yourself comfortable again. Alastor was gone by the time you were settled and you rolled your eyes and decided to forget about that encounter.

However life decided you weren’t done with the day yet. Someone knocked on the door. You groaned, melodramatically opening the door up.

“Uh? Bad time?” Lucifer said with a lopsided grin.

“Oh? Nah, I’m just being silly.” You said with a shrug. “What’ s up?”

“Uh. Well.” Lucifer said, rubbing at the back of his neck “You know, earlier, when you were saying Husk was the most huggable person ‘cause of the wings and stuff? I mean. I have wings.” He materialized his wings and spread them for emphasis. “And. Uh. So. I guess I’m wondering why I‘m not huggable….?” He ducked his head down, grin wobbly as more of his face turned red.

You blinked.

“Um. Sorry?”

Lucifer’s grin dropped entirely and he started flailing his arm around “No no no! You don’t have anything to apologize for! I’m sorry- I! Fuck I’m bad at this.” He sighed, running a hand down his face. You tilted your head, confusion beginning to cross into concern territory.

“Um-“

Lucifer disappeared into a cloud of sparkles only to immediately reappear right next to you.

“My apologies for my silly doppleganger.” He said, checking his nails nonchalantly. “In anycase, I have an important question for you.”

You snorted, crossing your arms “Ah, yes. Your doppleganger. Who is not you.”

Lucifer waved you off “Most certainly not, I am a superb mentlegan- Ah, FUCK!”

Lucifer poofed into sparkles again and reappeared on your opposite side. He dusted his shirt off “Whoops, there was another one of those imposters of mine. Sorry about that.”

You covered your mouth, trying to hide your laugh. “Yeah. There seems to be a lot of those right now.”

“Indeed.” He said, checking his nails. “Can’t blame them for wanting to pretend to be the King of Hell.”

“I dunno.” You said with a hum “I’ve heard rumors the King of Hell is kind of a huge dork.”

“Ah, yes- wait really?”

You laughed. He chuckled a bit, fidgeting with his sleeves. “Uh, yeah. My antics aside. Uh. Can I ask a question?”

“Sure. I see no reason why not.” You said with a shrug.

“Um. So. How would you rate my huggable-ness?” He said, grin snaking back up on his face. You smiled at him.

“May I get a sample for study?”

Lucifer’s wings twitched “Oh-Oh! Yeah! Sure!”

You chuckled and hugged him. He went tense for a moment, stock-still. Then the King of all of Hell practically melted into you, arms wrapping around you and squeezing tightly. Wings gently curled around you both. Soft and warm.

Overall, very solid hug. Only issue is you had to lean down a bit to do so.

[1-800-be-my-baby]

Could you write something where reader is best friends with Sarah and has had a crush on rafe for a long time. There’s some situation like going on vacation with the Cameron family and John b joins so the reader has to share a bed with rafe. He wakes up at night bc reader is having a wet dream, cuddled up next to/on him, grinding against his thigh. He gets really turned on and starts touching her & she wakes up. Maybe he teases her a bit like asking if she had a good dream, pointing out how wet she got his thigh and then they have sex. Reader is a bit embarrassed and shy about it. - 🧚🏻‍♂️

i love the way your brain works. also sorry i got a bit carried away. pt 2!

MDNI 18+

going on a yearly vacation with the cameron’s is not something new to you. you’d always share a room with sarah, staying up late the room filled with your giggles and hushed whispers. this time would be different though. sarah’s new boyfriend, john b would be tagging along. the new addition causing sleeping arrangements to be changed.

“what do you mean i have to share a room with rafe?” you stare at sarah, eyes nearly popping out of your head.

“it’ll be fine. rafe can just sleep on the floor!”

“no fucking way! i’m not sleeping in the same room as him!”

“pleaseeee? for me?” she clasps her hands together, giving you that look that makes you crumble everytime.

“jesus christ. fine. just this once. you owe me though.” you huff out. she lets out a loud squeal

“ohmygosh thank you so much! i definitely owe you big time!” you roll your eyes.

“yeah whatever. you’re lucky i love you.”

"i am not sleeping on the fucking floor" rafe snaps at you. irritated with the situation and ready to go to bed.

"fine i'll go find somewhere else to sleep then." you huff out crossing your arms. you begin to head towards the door when rafe calls out.

"jesus kid. this bed is big enough for the both of us to sleep and keep a good distance away from each other. what do you think m' gonna do?"

"i dunno. maybe suffocate me in my sleep or something." he lets out a laugh, he can't help but find your dramatics funny.

"just get in the fucking bed"

"fine. but keep your hands to yourself. i swear to god" you poke at him

"got it." he raises his hands in defense.

its 3 am when rafe wakes up to you practically laying on top of him, grinding on his thigh. he rubs his eyes, making sure he's awake and that this is really happening. you let out a quiet whimper as your brows furrow together. he stares down at you, a smirk forming on his face.

he allows his fingers to find your core, softly grazing over your cunt. he can feel the fabric that does little to cover you slowly becoming soaked. this pushes him over the edge as he moves ur panties to the side, slowly dragging his fingers through your folds catching on your clit. you let out a moan as your eyes begin to flutter open.

"rafe? what are you doing?"

"what am i doing? you were the one who woke me up, humping my leg like a bitch in heat. you're a cock hungry whore even when you're asleep.” you let out another moan, his fingers still rubbing at your clit.

"if you don't want this then tell me to stop." your hips begin to buck up involuntary. heat rises to your cheeks, thanking god that its dark and he can't see just how embarrassed you are. but with the pressure he's applying to your needy clit all rational thoughts leave your brain. your senses completely filled with rafe.

"rafe. please just fuck me. need it so bad." you let out a desperate whine, his teasing increasing your arousal, though still not enough.

"yeah that's what i thought." he shoves two thick fingers inside of you without any warning. causing you to take a sharp breath in. his fingers massage that spongy part that makes your head fuzzy and your eyes roll back. the band in your tummy tightening with each stroke of his fingers.

"you gonna cum?" you nod your head vigorously as you feel yourself getting closer to the edge.

"yeah? what happened to you wanting me to keep my hands to myself? over here makin' a mess all over my fingers."

"please rafe im so close. can i please cum? i need it" tears gather at your waterline. the burning in your stomach almost too much to handle.

"fuck. go ahead. cum for me baby. make a fucking mess." his words cause the band to snap, your orgasm washing over you soaking his hand and the sheets.

"good girl. that's it. let me have it." he helps you ride out your high before pulling his fingers out of your cunt. he brings his fingers to your mouth.

"gotta clean up the mess you made. yeah?"

[oneforthemunny]

round and round |boxer!eddie munson x reader|

prompt: a snide, joking comment has you and eddie trying something new in the ring to spice things up. a ring girl, announcing each round you and eddie do. horrible fucking descript lol, but based off of this ask from the lovely @belokhvostikova

word count: 6k+

contains: boxer!eddie. mean-ish!eddie?? rough sex, but everything is consensual. idk if it counts as roleplay but i'll tag it just in case. mean, nasty sex lol. fem fingering, grinding, pinvsex, creampie. kinda aftercare? they're mean but it works ok? just filthy fun idk. smut. 18+ minors dni.

“Look at you.” Eddie grinned, arms hanging over the side of the ropes. “Do a spin for me, baby. Let me see the whole thing.” 

You rolled your eyes, pivoting in the tiniest twirl to show off your little outfit; a skimpy skirt that flounced with every step, a too tight top with a plunging neckline. It was a stark contrast to what you normally wore to Eddie’s practices, that is when you actually showed up to his practices. Typically opting for a track suit, maybe jeans if you were feeling especially generous, but this was a different practice today. 

What had started as a joke, a snide sneer of a comment, maybe stemming from jealousy at the way the ring girl looked at Eddie when she strutted away, batting her eyes and giving him a dazzling smile. You weren’t entirely upset at the jab his opponent gave him after that, he’d deserved it. 

“Maybe I should dress like her, hm?” You had sneered that night, grip tightening around his bicep when you passed the same girl after the match. 

“Yeah,” Eddie snorted, shaking his head. “For who?” 

“I dunno.” You shrugged, lips pursing, eyes narrowing. “I guess for you. Maybe you’ll actually pay attention to me if I did.” 

Eddie scoffed at you, rolling his eyes so hard the throbbing in his left temple started up again. “Sure.” He pushed the door open to the back of the arena, letting you walk before him. “I don’t pay attention to them, baby. I’m in the middle of a fight.” 

You hummed sarcastically. “I’m sure you don’t.” 

“Maybe if you wore it, I would.” Eddie’s lips curled in a smug smirk that made you want to smack it right off his face. “Definitely would pay attention then.” 

You didn’t realize how serious he was about it until later, in your own home. Bloodied knuckles brushing over your chin, your cheek, swallowing you with kisses, fingers slipping under your nightgown. “Think you really should dress up.” Eddie muttered, steaming kisses trailing down your jaw, nipping at your chin. “Let me take you for a coupla rounds. See if you can take me.” 

Now, you wondered if it was still what he wanted, walking to the small practice ring, blistering under Eddie’s hungry gaze. “You like it?” You smoothed your hand over your tiny skirt. “Short enough?” 

“I don’t know, c’mere, let me get a closer look.” Eddie grinned, pulling the ropes up so you could duck under them. 

You hiked your leg up, turning away from him when you stepped under so he got a full view of your tiny thong underneath. Eddie smirked, swatting at your ass, smug at how you squealed. 

“You look…” Eddie leaned back against the ropes, arms crossing over his chest. His eyes rolled over your frame, taking in every inch of your body, leaving you burning with excited heat under his gaze. “Amazing, baby.” 

“Yeah?” You hummed, pulling your neckline lower, biting back a grin at Eddie’s laugh. “Look like the real thing?” 

“Better.” Eddie nodded. “You ready to go all six rounds?” 

“Six?” You gawked. “You didn’t say six.” 

“You said you wanted me to take it easy on you.” Eddie shrugged. 

“Taking it easy is six?” You lifted a brow. “Can you even last six rounds?” 

Eddie’s tongue rolled over his teeth, biting back a smirk. He wouldn’t snap back, wouldn’t huff and bitch at you when you tried to get him riled up. Oh no, he’d do what he did best, and take it out in the ring. 

“I think you and I both know I can.” Eddie countered cooly, pushing off the ropes. 

You hated the way your knees shook under his gaze, throbbing between your thighs. Eddie picked up the sign behind him. He had found it tucked in a storage closet, the letters fading from age, the perfect prop. 

“Make sure you hold it up high, alright.” Eddie grinned, patting your hip when he passed you. 

You looked over your shoulder, eyes batting sweetly towards him, nestled in the corner or the ring. “You ready?” 

“Oh, yeah.” Eddie nodded. “Ready when you are, baby. Show me your walk.” 

You swallowed the spit pooling in your mouth, shoulders rolling back before you lifted the sign, strutting to the edge and back with a dazzling smile, just like you’d seen the girls do a thousand times before. 

Eddie’s wolf whistle cut through the empty gym, clapping slowly at your finished hip pop, dramatic, a little silly. “How was that?” You asked, passing him the sign. 

“Best I’ve ever seen.” Eddie smirked, tossing the sign out of the way. “Now,” He lined himself up, toe to toe. “You gotta ring the bell.” 

“The bell?” You snorted, looking around. “What bell?” 

“Gotta ring the bell.” Eddie looked at you, down the slope of his nose. A darkness in those brown eyes you adored that had your heart skipping with fear, maybe excitement. 

“What? Like, ding, ding?” You scoffed, your eye roll cut short when Eddie grabbed you, two hands on your waist, spinning you and pulling you flush into his chest. 

You gasped, shocked, stumbling into his hold. “Wait!” Eddie ignored your cry, arm wrapping over yours in a tight grip, pinning you there. His free hand pressed to your lower stomach, right over the top of the skirt. 

You squirmed, feet digging into the ground, body wriggling in Eddie’s grasp. “Told you to stay on your toes.” Eddie hummed. 

“I wasn’t ready.” You snapped, arms wiggling by your sides where Eddie had them trapped. “You’re such a cheater.” 

“Oh? Am I?” Eddie growled, breath hot on your neck. You snarled, wrenching away. “I never told you this was gonna be a fair fight.” His free hand slid down the front of your tiny skirt, stopping just on your mound, pressing gently so you whimpered. “But something tells me you’re not gonna mind.” 

Your scoff was cut off by his hand slipping between your legs, pointer and middle finger pressed to the soft cotton of your panties. You melted into his broad chest, chin tucked to look down the valley of your squished tits. 

The whine you gave when Eddie circled over your clothed clit was music to his ears, electrifying him with a bout of energy. Teeth grazing over the shell of your ear, nibbling just barely, enough to have you squealing, squirming against him though he could feel you soaking his fingers through your panties. 

“C’mon, you’re just gonna give in that easy?” Eddie mocked. “I mean, I knew it’d be easy. Knew you’d be tapping out before long, but I thought you might try a little harder than this.” Fighting words. He knew it, lips pulled tight in a grin. 

Your body burned, hot with fury, with the pleasure he was giving you. Every atom in your body told you to stay, to let him pleasure you, give into ecstasy, but your pride wouldn’t let you. Heels digging into the floor, you pushed against Eddie, away from his hand that fought to keep you down. 

“Ooh, you’re gettin’ mad, hm? That made you mad?” Eddie snickered, grip tightening around you. “Already ready to tap out?” 

“Shut up.” You gritted, swallowing back a whine, body stuttering when his fingers swirled around your clit again. 

“I can already taste victory.” Eddie smirked smugly, fingers pressing into your slick, soaking the cotton of your tiny panties.”How about you?” His breath hot on the shell of your ear. “You want a taste?” 

Eddie lifted his fingers, sticky and soaked in your arousal, an evident string connecting in the middle of the two fingers. You blistered in heat, turning away from his fingers. 

“C’mon, open up for me. Have a little taste.” Eddie cooed, nearly taunting, free hand sneaking up your torso to grab your jaw, hold you in place. 

You whimpered behind a closed mouth, jaw hinged shut, his fingers digging into your cheeks holding you steady. “Open up f’me. Taste yourself. Tell me how good you taste, baby.” 

It was embarrassing, Eddie knew that. Of course he knew that. It was exactly why he teased you like this, because he knew how wet it got you. How badly you tried to fight it even when your body betrayed you, even when the evidence was right in front of you. 

A jerking twist of your body nearly had you getting away. Nearly. 

Eddie’s arms wrapped tighter around your torso, hugging you back into his chest. “Oh, c’mon. You know you gotta be faster than that, baby.” He shook his head at you. 

“Are you seriously going to do this the whole time?” You huffed, nails digging back into his hips. 

Eddie didn’t hiss, didn’t snap at you, bend you over his knee with your hands pinned behind your back to spank you. Instead, he moaned. A breathy groan behind closed lips that shook all the way down his body, vibrated onto your skin, left you aching to your core. 

That fucker. 

“Ugh, seriously, Ed. Just let me go.” You scoffed, wiggling against him, ass purposefully brushing against his crotch. “This isn’t even fun.” 

“Fun for me.” Eddie growled, hips rolling into the fat of your ass. “You’re not having fun?” 

“No.” You snapped. “No, I’m not.” 

Eddie tutted, tongue clicking sympathetically. “Aw, that’s no good, now is it? Can’t have that.” He cooed in that same mocking tone that had you wishing your arms were free so you could smack him. 

His hand moved back down the front of your skirt, sliding under the hem, back to your panties, circling over the same damp spot. Your knees buckled, brain bursting with numbing pleasure. “I’ll make sure it’s fun for you again.” 

Two fingers circling over your clothed clit expertly is how he won that round. You stuttered, squirming, grinding down into his touch until your body shook with pleasure. Your slick still covering Eddie’s fingers, he let you go, stumbling towards the ropes on shaky legs. 

Your chest heaving, you looked back at him with a glassy eyed glare. Eddie held your gaze, firm and commanding, taking his two slick soaked fingers in his mouth with a sigh. You ached at the sight. 

“Missed out.” Eddie hummed, spit clicking around his fingers when he pulled them from his mouth. “Taste damn good, baby.” 

Your lips twisted, gripping the ropes to steady yourself. Eddie shrugged, heavy steps back to his own corner, leaning over to get the next sign. “Go ahead.” He tossed it to you with a flick of his wrist, letting it scutter to the ground of the ring, sliding to your feet. “Next round.” 

“Seriously?” You huffed, lifting a brow. 

“I won that round.” Eddie rolled his eyes. 

“No, I have to- You want me to seriously do the sign every time?” You looked down at the large sign, mocking letters of Round Two. You were regretting agreeing to six. 

“Are you tapping out already?” Eddie lifted a brow, inked arms crossed over his defined chest. “That’s all it took?” 

“No.” You hissed, fiercely, reaching to snatch the sign, hoping Eddie didn’t see the way your thighs trembled when you did. “Just think it’s stupid you want me to do this.” 

“This was your idea, baby.” Eddie scoffed, giving you a pointed glare. 

“Yeah, and you were really excited about it, Munson. Don’t act like you weren’t.” You countered with the same bite in your tone. 

“Of course I was, but it wasn’t my idea.” Eddie shrugged, tongue rolling over his cheek in that same cocky manner that had you steaming with fury. “If it was my idea, I’d have you topless.” 

“Oh?” You scoffed, rolling your eyes. “That right?” 

“Yeah.” Eddie smirked, eyes sliding hungrily down your frame. “Still could be. Go ahead and take that bra off f’me, baby.” 

“No.” You sneered, nose scrunching at the request. “You’re being gross.” 

“Yeah? ‘S alright. I’ll get it off.” Eddie grinned, dark and dimpled. You swallowed down a shudder. “On your mark, baby.” 

You rolled your eyes, putting the sign in your hands and lifting it half heartedly. “Oh, no, no, no. Nuh-uh.” Eddie’s tone was sharp, head shaking from the other side of the ring. “You’re gonna do this right, or we’re not gonna do it at all.” 

The threat in his tone had your spine tingling, straightening at his words. “Now, lift that sign up and do your little walk, or we’ll stop right here.” His arms crossed at you. “That what you want?” 

You huffed, nails digging into the sign before lifting it up high, putting on a fake, overly exaggerated smile and striding towards the middle of the ring. 

Eddie smirked. “Atta girl. Good choice.” He eyed your skirt as you turned back to your corner, petulantly throwing the sign down. 

“Alright, you know what you’re ‘sposed to do now, baby. C’mon, let’s get going.” Eddie jogged, bouncing on his toes, shaking out his arms, really putting on a show for you. 

You fought back a snort of a laugh, crossing your arms instead, still clinging to the ropes. “Ok, I’m ready.” You muttered. 

Eddie’s brows lifted in shock. “No, c’mon, why’re you being like this? Sore fuckin’ loser already? You still have a fighting chance, for now.” 

“You’re being mean, Ed.” You huffed. “This is supposed to be fun.” 

“Mean?” Eddie snorted. “You got to cum. I’m the one stuck with blue balls, baby. I should be the one bitching and moaning.” 

“You’re such a dick. Can you just play nice, for once?” You rolled your eyes, head shaking in annoyance at him. 

“You want me to play nice? Fine, I’ll play nice.” Eddie rolled his eyes right back at you, annoyed with your antics. “Ring the bell, baby. I’ll go easier on you this time.” 

You glared at him, holding him under your gaze for a moment before relenting. “Fine. Ding. Round started.” 

Eddie took a step away from the ropes, but didn’t move, hands over his chest, he waited for you. For you to take careful steps towards him, at a safe distance. Eddie didn’t move, he wouldn’t. He’d play fairer this time, let you have the first move. 

You finally took your chance, stepping toe to toe with him. Your gaze on his, the both of you looking unmovingly at the other, Eddie’s arms still crossed. You hummed in satisfaction, sinking to your knees with a tiny grin, fingers toying with the strings of his shorts. 

Eddie sighed slowly through his nose. He almost felt guilty. You looked so sweet, so smug, lashes batting towards him, fingers hooking to pull his boxers down slowly. Eddie almost gave in, let you have your way. 

Almost. 

“Hey!” You screeched, a hand knotting through your hair, pulling you back when you started to lean forward. “What the fuck, Ed?” You spat, glaring up at him, hands on his wrist. 

“Go ahead.” Eddie smirked, a steel hand holding you in place by your hair. “Go on, baby.” 

You leaned forward barely, your scalp screaming from Eddie’s firm hold. Every tug and pull with your movements had you frustrated. 

“Are you- Are you serious?” You growled, nails digging into his wrist, trying to pry his hand from your scalp. Eddie’s smirk made you even more furious. “You said you’d be nice.” 

“I am.” Eddie answered coolly. 

“You are not.” You sneered around a frustrated huff. “You’re being mean.” 

“Oh, this isn’t mean.” Eddie shook his head, unmoving elsewhere with his grip. “You want me to show you mean?” 

You frowned. “No.” You clicked in annoyance. “I’m trying to suck your dick.” You said bluntly, hoping for even a slight reaction. 

Eddie only laughed, soft, lips tugging in a smile. “So go ahead.” Eddie nodded down to you. “Go on, baby.” 

“I can’t.” You spat, still fighting against his hand. “You know I can’t.” 

“You can’t?” Eddie tilted his head to the side. “C’mon. ‘S right there.” He pushed his growing erection towards you, so close you could almost taste it. 

“You’re such an asshole.” You growled, sinking back on your knees. “Try to suck your dick and you hold me back? What is wrong with you?” 

“Aw, I’m sorry, baby.” Eddie tsked, sinking down to his knees in a crouch in front of you, his hand releasing its grip just barely. “I’m so mean, aren’t I?” That same mocking tone found its way back into Eddie’s words. You tried to hide the way it infuriated you. 

“Not giving you what you want. What a-” 

You didn’t let him finish his taunt. The second his grip loosened, you took your chance, tearing from his grasp, lunging forward to topple him over, pinning him on the mat. 

Eddie’s head hit the hard floor of the ring with a grunt, your nails digging into his bare shoulders, straddling his stomach. The fluorescent lights illuminated around you, a silver lining around your hair and features. 

“You are an asshole.” Your eyes narrowed, finishing his sentence from before. “A mean, mean asshole.” 

“That right?” Eddie smirked, swallowing thickly. He could feel your heat on his abdomen, the damp spot of your panties teasing him- driving him fucking wild. 

“Mmhm.” You nodded, grinning triumphantly. “And I’m not rewarding you for that.” 

“Oh?” Eddie laughed, brows raising amusingly. “You’re not?” 

You shook your head. “No, because you haven’t been very nice.” You tilted your head to the side. “I don’t think you deserve for me to suck your dick.” 

Eddie’s lips rolled, fighting back a smirk. You were so confident, so cocky, it was adorable. Adorable that you really thought you had him pinned. You should know better, know not to leave his hands free, but he’d let you continue your smugness if only for his own pleasure. 

You scooted back, shimmying down until your core was over Eddie’s throbbing bulge, grinding down over it. 

“Oh, shit,” Eddie groaned, head tipping back onto the floor of the ring when you started to grind slowly, painfully slow. Hips rocking in a circle, expertly rubbing him just the right way with every roll of your hips. 

You leaned your weight into your hands, pressing down on Eddie’s shoulders, palms digging into the etchings of skin- a dagger with a heart under your left, a flaming skull in the right. Under the inked skin, you could see Eddie’s own pale flesh tinging with a pink flush. 

“That’s it.” The sigh whistled through Eddie’s teeth like a hiss. He clenched his hands, fought to keep them from reaching up, sinking into your hips. 

“You like that?” You grin wickedly down at Eddie, hovering over him, hips rocking slowly. Enough that you know he’s enjoying it, you can feel every excited twitch from him under your hold. 

“Mmm.” Eddie nearly whimpers. “Fuck, you know I do. Feel good, baby.” 

“See? This is how you play nice.” You grin, leaning forward, catching his bottom lip between your teeth lightly, pulling back so you could see the inked letters- your initials on the inside in a gothic font. He’d gotten it on a rare drunken night in Los Angeles. You told him not to, told him it was stupid, but held his hand sweetly while the tattoo artist carved it into his skin. 

“Shit, baby, you-you gotta stop.” Eddie’s teeth clenched, vein on his neck bulging at the sensation. You continued your pace, nails digging into his skin. “Babe, seriously, I’m gonna fuckin’ bust if you keep this up.” 

“Oh?” You quipped, brow raising dramatically. “Is this a forfeit?” 

Eddie rolled his eyes, scoff catching in his throat when you pressed your core further into his length, hips swiveling in a circle. Eddie swallowed a groan, jaw flexing under you. “Not a forfeit.” He shook his head. “But you…you- oh fuck me- you win this round.” 

“What’s that?” You tilted your head to his, mockingly. He fought the urge to flip you over, pin your hands behind your back and make a mess of you. Teach you a lesson. 

“You win.” Eddie growled, eyes dark and daring at you. “This round.” He added when your hips finally slowed. 

Your arousals mixing through the fabric left you and Eddie sporting matching wet spots on your panties and on his shorts. Eddie tracked you, chest heaving in a slow, deep pace through hooded eyes. 

A smug pep returned to your step, hips swaying back to your corner, bending over dramatically so Eddie could get a full view of your ass when you grabbed the third sign. His cock throbbed at the sight, swallowing down the urge to take you right there, over the ropes. 

Instead he stood, palming himself for a moment to release some of the ache in his cock, walking back to his own corner of the ring. You watched him, lips rolling in a triumphant smile. 

“We’re tied, Munson.” Your nails tapped on the sign. 

“For now.” Eddie nodded back coolly, leaning back onto his corner, arms draping over the side of the ropes. “Go ahead.” 

You lifted the sign high, eyes on him in a narrowed glare- challenging. Strutting into the middle, you spun on your heel, making sure to snap your hips with every step. You knew Eddie was watching you, eyes glued to your ass, your legs, mouth salivating at the sight. He wouldn’t last long, wouldn’t be able to resist, he was still just a man, afterall. 

“Are you ready?” Eddie asked, arms crossed over his chest, flexing. You fought an eye roll. 

“Are you?” You countered, brow lifted at him. 

Eddie snorted lightly, a puff of air falling from his nose. “I’m ready.” He nodded. “Ring that bell, baby.” 

“Ding.” You deadpanned, taking a small, creeping step from the ropes. 

Eddie took a wide step towards you, a chess match, every step you’d take he’d challenge. You were growing frustrated, shoulders rising and falling sharply, swallowing back huffs, hands raised slightly in front of you to keep him away, keep yourself at a distance. 

Adorable, Eddie thought. 

He didn’t look, didn’t give himself away or even give you a warning. Before you could even comprehend what was happening, Eddie had your wrists in his hands, pulling them behind your back. 

“Oh, come on!” You huffed, fighting in his grasp, Eddie walking you towards the ropes. His sneaker propped on the bottom rope, grabbing your hands in his right, pushing the middle rope up while he dropped to his free knee. 

“No, no, Eddie.” You dug your heels into the ground, pushing back when he tried to haul you over his knee. “Eddie, don’t you fucking dare. I’m serious.” 

“Don’t what?” Eddie hummed, tugging you forward, your abdomen pressed over his thigh. 

“Eddie.” You hissed, cheeks burning with fury. “We are not playing like this tonight.” 

“What do you mean, babe?” You could practically hear Eddie’s smug smirk, content and happy that he was embarrassing you. “What do you think I’m gonna do?” His free hand brushed over the seat of your skirt, squeezing the fat of your right cheek. 

You huffed, wiggling and fighting to get out of his grip, his hand on the small of your back kept you in place. “Eddie, this is so not fucking funny. You better not.” You growled. “I did not say you could.” 

“Oh,” Eddie sighed dramatically. “Oh, you think I’m going to spank you?” Your body burned at the word, rushing with shamed excitement the same way you always did, thighs pressing together. 

“‘M not gonna spank you, baby, don’t worry.” Eddie smirked, patting the seat of your skirt lightly. “But I don’t know why you get so embarrassed to say it, baby. You certainly enjoy it when I spank you.” 

“Fuck you, Eddie.” You sneered, wrists jerking in his firm grasp. 

“Mm, not yet, baby. Have some patience, we'll get there.” Eddie muttered, fingers tracing the edge of your panties, fingers slipping inside. 

You tried to fight the shudder that tore through your nervous system, clouded your veins with pleasure when Eddie’s calloused fingertips slipped through your folds, circling, teasing your sopping hole. 

“You couldn’t do this without holding me like this?” You rolled your eyes, swallowing back a whine. “Seriously, Eddie, this is so uncomfort- oh shi-it.” A strangled gasp tore from your chest when Eddie pushed a finger in, curling expertly, a slow pump inside of you. 

“Uncomfortable?” Eddie lifted a brow, shaking his head slowly. “Just relax and it won’t be. C’mon, you’re not gonna win this round anyways. Just let me take care of you.” 

You’d blame it on your brain, still hazy from your earlier orgasm, that had to be the reason you didn’t fight him. The reason you didn’t snap at him, try to kick him, why you just submitted under his touch. Let him make you feel good, until you were squirming in his hold, toes curling at your fast approaching orgasm until it consumed you. Left you whining, body spasming with aftershocks of pleasure. 

“Hmm, who’s the winner of this round?” Eddie asked, pulling his fingers from your sopping cunt, wiping your arousal on your ass, painting the soft skin with your sticky release. 

You didn’t answer, unsure if you could even if you wanted to. “Ooh, don’t be like that, baby.” Eddie pulled you up slowly, letting you settle onto his thigh, holding you to his chest. 

You rubbed your wrist, glaring at him though it was softened by the dazed, glowy look in your eyes. Eddie’s hand rubbed over your hip, lips pressing to your temple sweetly, much softer now. 

“You alright?” Eddie muttered, pushing the hair out of his view so he could see your face fully. 

“Yeah.” You hummed, rubbing your wrist gently, staring ahead. 

“You sure?” Eddie pressed, pulling back to look at you fully. 

Your head lolled to the side, a pout and scowl all at once- your signature look, Eddie always teased you about that. “My arms hurt.” Your brows furrow at him. “I can’t stand it when you do that. Your hands are so sweaty, Rubbed my wrists raw.” Your nose crinkles in disgust, just enough to have Eddie grinning. 

“Could’ve tapped out.” Eddie hums, nose nuzzling against the soft skin of your cheek. “Still can. Call it quits. Make me the winner.” 

You sighed, leaning back into his coaxing touch. “Where’s the fun in that?” You muttered, eyes fluttering open, met with Eddie’s wolfish grin. That was exactly why he loved you, head over heels even if he was reluctant to admit it. 

“Fine.” Eddie’s tongue ran over his teeth. “But I won that round.” 

“Sure.” You rolled your eyes, pushing off his thigh, wobbling slightly at the burn in your calves, thighs. “Two to one.” 

Eddie stood with a silent groan, stretching his leg. “Go get your sign.” He nodded towards the corner. 

You scoffed lightly. “You’re really committed to this?” 

“Yeah. I don’t half ass things, sweetheart, you should know that.” Eddie strode back to his corner. “Round four.” 

“I know.” You click, the fight returning back to your tone, dripping with annoyance. It made Eddie’s hands buzz, jittery with excitement. 

It was the same routine, holding the sign up with burning limbs, still recovering from being held into place. A strut that was more like a step now, a little shaky, though you tried to mask it. Eddie still tracked you, arms crossed, head tilted high and cocky, though his eyes were clouded with a darkness that made your senses jolt alive. 

“Ok,” You flung the sign to the side, shoulders rolling back. “I’m ready.” 

“That the bell?” 

“That’s the bell.” You nodded, pushing off the ropes slowly.

Eddie met you at the middle of the ring, the two of you circling around the other, prowling, waiting for the other to make the first move. You reached out for Eddie, hoping to pounce on him like before. He expected it this time, catching you by your waist. A hand cradled behind your head, pulling you down onto the ring with a huff, hand protecting the collide of the mat with your head. 

“Ow,” You hissed through gritted teeth at the sudden jostling.

“That didn’t hurt.” Eddie rolled his eyes dramatically. He knew it didn’t, he knew what you sounded like when you were hurt- he knew all your sounds, all your looks, including the one you were giving him. A glassy eyed glare, tired and ready to submit, ready to get what you wanted. 

“You’re being so rough today.” You rolled your eyes. “This is supposed to be fun.” 

“You’re not having fun?” Eddie huffed, straddling your hips, fingers teasing the edge of your panties, skirt flipped over your midsection. “C’mon, you know you’re having fun.” Eddie grinned. 

“Can we call it? Can you just fuck me?” You blinked at him, unamused. That same demanding look, brows pinched, furrowed in a defiant, demanding frown that had Eddie’s cock twitching behind the nylon material of his shorts. 

“Oh? What’s this? Thought I would be the one who couldn’t last?” Eddie snickered, mean and teasing, accompanied with a dimple grin that resembled more of a sneer. Your lips twitched in a snarl. His fingers curled, pulling around the tiny band of your panties. 

“You’re just being annoying now.” You roll your eyes, hips lifting so he could tug your panties off. “Just fuck me now. I know you want to.” Your hips raised again, bare crotch rubbing against his clothed one. 

“Hm, so I’m the winner? You sure? We still have, what? Three more rounds? Anyone’s game, baby.” Eddie balled your panties in his hand, fist closing around on the skimpy material. 

“Eddie, just stop.” You hated how whiney your tone was. “Just fuck me already.” 

“Nuh-uh-uh, sweetheart.” Eddie shook his head. “Gotta announce my victory. C’mon.” He patted your thigh sweetly. 

“Eddie,” You groaned, the heel of your palms pressing to your eyes in frustration. He loved doing this to you, just fucking with you. Getting your head spinning, thoughts so bleary and distorted until you were seething with exasperation and desperation. 

“I’ll do it after, ok? You can have your little victory lap after. Just-Just please.” It hardly sounded nice, sweet and begging like Eddie would normally have you ask. On your knees, usually,  lip jutted, broken into submission for him, forced to use a sweet tone that was foreign to the both of you to persuade him to give in to you. 

“How do I know you’re not tricking me, hm? Fighting dirty so you get the win?” Eddie looked down the slope of his nose at you, eyes dark and borning, pinning you to the mat. You knew by the way his chest was boasting, puffing out in smug satisfaction, that he was enjoying this. Enjoying having you like this. 

“Do you really think that’s what I’m doing?” Your tone clipped, filled with venomous annoyance. “Quit being stupid and fuck me, or I’ll find someone who will.” 

Eddie’s smug demeanor dropped, eyes narrowed down at you. His jaw rolled, teeth sucking in irritation. A sore spot, you knew it. You knew how possessive Eddie was of you. You’d experienced it first hand at a pre-match press conference when Boudouani made a snide comment to Eddie, taunting him about you. Your dress you were wearing, black and short, something about how he wanted to take it off. You didn’t hear the whole thing, Eddie had lunged over the podium at him, it took his entire team to hold him back. Take it out in the ring, and so he had, delivering a solid punch to the other’s jaw, a perfect knock-out in the fifth round. 

“Oh, it’s like that? You’re gonna be like that?” Eddie snarled through a still tight jaw. 

You stayed quiet, a little unsure as you tracked him. He’d pushed you, frazzled you past the point of decency. 

Eddie shoved his shorts down, cock springing free, dangling in front of you nearly tauntingly. You would’ve sucked him off, crawled to him and took him down your throat sweetly as some sort of apology. Eddie grabbed your ankles before you could, tugging them up as he sank to his knees, your legs over his shoulders, back sliding in a stuttered friction from the mat towards him. 

“You want someone else?” Eddie sneered, one hand on your thigh, the other pumping his length but his eyes stayed on yours, locked into your gaze fiercely. “That what you want?” You bit back a moan, the head of his cock sliding over your folds, teasing you. 

“Hmm?” Eddie’s fingertips dug into your thigh, hard enough to have you whining. “If you want someone else, you go get ‘em, baby.” 

“I don’t.” Your voice was strangled, toes curling. You were close, so fucking close to getting what you wanted. “You just… You were getting on my nerves-” 

“-Oh? And you threw a little bitch fit because I was teasing you?” Eddie snorted furiously, the tip of his cock lining with your entrance. “You fucking know better.” 

You squirmed under his gaze, his tone soaked with chastisement that made you feel petulant and small. Your lips parted, a huffy retort on the tip of your tongue cut short by Eddie’s expert timing, cock pushing into you, filling you with a slow roll of his hips. 

“You think this shit’s funny?” Eddie’s free hand went to your other thigh, holding you steady to him, hips rocking slowly at first. He wanted to feel you, needed to, even if he was being hard with you. “How'd you like it if I said that? If I talked about fucking one of those ring girls.” 

“I’d think you were serious.” You sneered, swallowing back a moan, clenching to still your hips, so Eddie could feel you squeezing around him. “Already have me dressing up as one. Maybe you do-” 

“-Shut up.” Eddie grunted, pulling back, hips snapping to the fat of your thighs and ass with a sharp jab. “Just shut up, alright? I’m done hearing your fucking mouth. Ruinin’ shit.” 

“You’re getting a-awfully defensive.” You swallow back a whimper at his punishing pace. Punctuated and punishing, leaving you breathless and dizzy at the same time. 

“You’re awfully pissing me off.” Eddie gritted through clenched teeth, never breaking rhythm. You were so close already, too sensitive from before. “Don’t ruin this, alright? You’re getting what you fuckin’ want.” 

And you were. You finally were. Hands by your head, body lifted to Eddie could fuck into you at a brutal pace. Still, it made you drool, every punch of his cock to your cervix. Nails digging into your closed palms, toes curling, calves flexing against Eddie’s shoulder when his hand dropped down to circle your clit, pushing you right over that edge of pleasure. 

He had you flipped before your vision had even cleared. The fluorescents collidescoped with the beams and Eddie’s curls, until you found your cheek pressed to the floor of the mat. Normally you’d screech, push off the floor and bitch Eddie out for pressing you into the filthy mat. It didn’t even register in your foggy mind this time, letting him pin your hands behind your back, continuing his fastened pace. 

“One more round.” Eddie gritted, swallowing back a moan, the muted slap of his balls hitting your cunt, hips to the fat of your ass. “One more round and I win.” 

“You already won.” You muttered, drool pooling out of the corner of your mouth, body quivering with sensitivities. 

“What’s that?” Eddie’s abs clenched, a ghosting of a moan with his exhale. “C’mon, you were so loud earlier.” 

“You-” You whimpered, a shiver spilling down your spine. “You already won, Ed. You’re the winner.” 

Eddie swallowed, hips stuttering as his own orgasm washed over him. Your hushed, sweet tone, the words falling from your lips- music to his fucking ears. 

Eddie released your wrists, placing them beside you, kissing up your spine softly. You were sure your wrists would be bruised, raw at the very least, from before and now. Eddie’s own hands rubbed your back softly, still buried deep inside of you. Softer now, all of him, all of you too. 

The pull out was slow, Eddie using his shorts to wipe off his release that fell onto the mat. You managed to stand on shaky legs, clinging to his arm as he helped you. 

“I’m not taking a shower here. I didn’t bring shoes for that shower.” You muttered, still spacey but that edge hinting in your tone, Eddie grinned at it. 

“Hey, hold on.” Eddie grabbed your arm lightly, pulling you back to him. 

“What?” You huffed, feeling his release leak down your leg. You were desperate to go to the bathroom, change into your clothes, clean yourself up a little. “Ed, you gotta give me a break, alright? We can do whatever back home if you still want to, but I’m-” 

“-No,” Eddie shook his head, holding your hand in his so sweetly it made your knees weak, gooey with warmth. 

“You still gotta announce the winner. Not over ‘til you announce the winner.” Eddie grinned at you. For a second, you thought he might be kidding. 

The look in his eye, that competitive edge that always lingered still sparked behind those muddy puddle eyes, told you he was serious. 

A roll of your eyes was the only protest he got, half-hearted even at that. Your hand in his, you lifted his arm victoriously. “There. You’re the winner.” You let your hand fall with his. “Now, can I go change please, or do you need a formal victory an- oh.” 

Eddie pulled you flush to him, lips on yours, a firm kiss that matched his grip on your hips. Passionate, hard, full of finality in his affection, the way he always kissed you after a victory match. Usually bloodied and sweatier, a busted lip that you had to maneuver, or spilt knuckles. Still, you’d always let him, scurrying to the ropes after his declared victory. You learned quickly after the first few matches if you didn’t go to him, he’d fight the crowd to come to you. 

It was always how Eddie wanted to end his matches, celebrate his victories- with you. For all the brooding toughness, dirty cruelty and teasing, you knew he loved you. He knew you loved him, despite all your own flaws. 

On the ride back, sharing a cigarette in the Jaguar, ash falling on the dark leathered seats, Eddie looked over at you, breaking the snug silence that settled between the two of you. 

“Just for the record,” Eddie blew the smoke out the crack in the window, tapping the ash in the small compartment of the car, before passing the Marlboro to you. “I don’t like those fucking ring girls.” 

You looked over at him, thumb circling the soft paper of the cigarette. “Yeah?” 

“Yeah.” Eddie nodded, eyes cutting towards you briefly. “I don’t even look at them. I’m not… I got better shit to do.” 

“Oh, yeah?” You snorted lightly, lips wrapping around the dwindling cigarette stick, pulling a slow drag. 

“Yeah, gotta focus on winning.” Eddie scoffed like it was obvious. There was a pause, you letting the smoke fall past your lips into your own window crack. “Plus, y’know, got you at home. Not settling for them when I got the best.” 

Your lips curled in a grin, fingertips tickling his knuckles when you passed him back the cigarette. “For the record,” You leaned onto the console, smug at how he stiffened, trying to play it off. “I’m not looking for anyone else either. Just said that to make you mad.” 

“Of course, you did.” Eddie grumbled, rolling his eyes.You grinned, teeth sliding over your bottom lip. “I mean, you know I’m just messing with you.” You tuck a curl behind his ear, nail scratching gently over the shell of his ear. Eddie’s jaw clenched, fighting back a shudder. “Seriously. Why would I go look for some bum when I have the champ?”

[angelicpoison12]

sugary sweet ✧˖°.

just a silly aftercare moment with Adam, but he gets his feelings hurt a little

word count: 664

tags: drabble, Adam drabble, Adam being Adam, suggestive (at the end), Adam is butthurt over being called a 'big back', discussion of animals, tooth rotting fluff, pillowy comfort, SFW, MFA, gn!reader, no pronouns used on r, no use of y/n, Adam is a crybaby

SFW ✦

“if you were an animal, what do you think you’d be?” 

you asked Adam one night, your bare bodies entangled in the cotton sheets. He thought for a second.  “fuck, babe. can't you be like any other bitch i've banged and just ask dumb questions?”  you laughed at that, and asked,  “and what kind of questions are those exactly?”  “shit, i dunno.. favorite color? favorite food? dumb stuff that can be asked over and over again, and it’ll be different every time. i mean, my answers never change, but that’s because i’m cool.”  “it’s because you’re a nerd,”  you remarked with a smirk, nuzzling your nose into his neck affectionately. he groaned and rolled his eyes. finally, he answered your question. 

“i’d probably be an eagle, or maybe a peacock. i don't fucking know, just something that looks badass.” 

you honestly should’ve expected such an answer from Adam, but it still made you giggle, even if he wasn’t trying to be funny.  “now you. you can’t just ask me a question without me turning it around on you, babe.”  Adam remarked with a smirk, pressing a (surprisingly) tender kiss to your forehead.  “hm.. i’m not sure, actually. i’ll let you choose one for me.”  “in that case, a bunny.”  “and why a bunny?”  you asked, sitting up to face Adam properly. he had his cheek against his elbow, propped up against his pillow, gazing up at you lovingly. Adam always looked at you like you were his deity.  

“because you’re just.. small. so much smaller than me. and you’re cute, as well. you've got such pretty, innocent eyes, too.”  Adam hummed, sitting up to cup your face, kissing your jaw, then your cheek, his lips lingering as he whispered,  “.. and you’re always so excited when i come around. i want you to be my little bunny forever,”  Adam said. he pulled you close, your chests pressing together, his large, calloused hands from playing the guitar, making their way over your back and shoulders.  “i’m never lettin’ you go, baby. I promise.” 

in the midst of the gentle atmosphere, you nestled into Adam, enjoying his warmth. then you smirked as you said,  “i don’t know, Adam. I can’t see you as something like an eagle or peacock.. maybe a cute little piglet.” 

that made Adam stop dead in his tracks. 

“a fucking pig? why, babe? are you calling me fat?”  he retorted, crossing his arms and pouting like a child. you howled with laughter, trying to calm down to explain yourself. 

“no, no! not at all, Adam! pigs are cute! they’re big and strong, plus they’re loud, they’ve got flair sometimes, and uh..”  you trailed off, but you couldn’t hold in your laughter when you saw how red Adam’s face was. 

“first, Lute calls me a ‘big back’ at work, now-”  “she called you a what?!”  You were nearly crying from how hard you were laughing now, both arms around your belly. All Adam did was cross his arms again, pouting once more.  “A fucking-a ‘big back’, whatever the fuck that means!”  “oh my god... babe, she’s kinda right.”  “you’re so mean!”  Adam wailed. y'know, for someone being as huge in general as Adam, he was the biggest whiner and crybaby you knew. 

“aw, Adam.. you know i didn’t mean any of that, right?”  you said, gently cupping his face to kiss his lips.  “you didn’t..?”  Adam asked weakly. you didn’t mean to genuinely hurt his feelings, so the sight of him being so vulnerable was making your heart ache.  “yes.. i didn’t mean it at all, i promise. i was just joking around.”  “promise?”  "i promise.” 

Adam kissed you, humming as you pulled him closer, allowing you to roll on top of him.  “so.. wanna go again?”  Adam asked you with a smirk. you chuckled and nodded.  “hell yeah. just let me get some water, okay?”  “why not just drink my cum? it’s got way more vitamins than water,”  “.. why did I get with you again?”  "because you fell in love with my face, duh. now c'mere, this 'big back' needs to blow your back out."

˗ˏˋ ★ ˎˊ˗

my sweet little snowflake buddies!

@6esiree , @frxstwalker