#dweeb brigade

[thenotsofantasticlifestory]

Your Honor, I love them

[ms-scarletwings]

Honest truth, with every episode of this messed up show I finish rewatching I’m more are more sure that Dib is just as incompetent and short-sighted when it comes to his “mission” as Zim is. But it’s so funny to me that while Zim just makes bad plans, has awful priorities, and improvises a lot by the seat of his pants, Dib’s incompetent in the classical bumbling villain sense. Like, he’s doing the right thing, he generally has clever approaches and insights, makes full use of his resources, yet,

He’s still aesthetically and narratively such an antihero, the poor dweeb.

Observe, my magnificent Venn diagram

Only thing I didn’t want to tack on that because it bears worth of some more elaboration: Both of these two are horrible about recklessly arming their nemesis with tons of free information and striking opportunity that can only be used against them.

And Dib is worse at this, like, so… so much worse. Zim will do the classic ‘Muahahaha, now that I have you right where I want you, here’s a detailed presentation of my entire insidious plan, Batman!’ routine while at least having the class to wait until the hero is being lowered over the acid vat or tied to the train tracks. Dib, as a villain? Would start reciting that same speech while in the middle of trying to kidnap the hero, about 3 and a half steps way too early. It’s actually crazy how fast he will telegraph his next move even when he’s not in a position of having a real advantage yet.

The first time the two met and Dib stood there loudly showing himself as the most perceptive and hostile human in range? And then stood there explaining alien sleep cuffs and what he was going to do with them? And then stood there declaring war and that he’d identified Zim’s base location, swinging said cuffs around in front of the gnome brigade? Granted, he wasn’t aware of Zim’s security at the time, but the essence of that sequence was a pattern that he was more than happy to keep repeating for the next couple seasons.

Also, Zim’s brutalism, while it went to some shudder inducing places, is more expected from a genocidal maniac born from a race of colonial supremacists. It’s part of his theatrics and it’s fun for him in the same way it’s fun for his leaders to blow up innocent ice cream space-trucks and unlucky planets. Dib gets mean with their face offs in a way that’s just dripping with spite. All the time spite. Trivial, personal, petulant spite. Even more than Tak and her grudge, which, should be a lot more surprising to me. But it’s really not.

What it did do instead was remind me of a very interesting quote I once heard, from a Cracked video about online gaming behavior, of all places,

[thissortofsorcery]

This is a snippet of that social media modern!AU I wrote about a month ago! I’m not working on it officially, just letting the ideas flow for now.

-

Billy rehearses what he wants to say about a hundred ways in his mind all day. He doesn’t really pay attention to any of his classes, keeps circling back to ways to convince Harrington to take him up on his offer.

It doesn’t help that people keep turning around in their seats to shoot him looks and whisper shit in class. It’s been a week since Hagan posted the TikTok saying that Billy beat Harrington up, and the gossip is still hot, what with the thing going fucking viral. Everyone and their mother made a duet giving a score to the bruising on Harrington’s face.

Like Billy needed to feel any more like a piece of shit.

He turned his phone off during first period. He couldn’t stand it going off in his pocket every fucking minute, reminding him his popularity was going up because of something he fucked up.

So he was going to talk to Harrington today. Make it up to him.

Billy waits to talk to Harrington after school, in the parking lot. They’ve had to wait for the dweeb brigade at the middle school often enough that Billy knows they’ll have some time to talk before they show up, so Billy just tosses his bag in his car and leans on the hood to wait for Harrington to show up.

Sure enough, just a couple minutes later, the sound of Harrington’s BMW unlocking rings out, and Billy walks up to him. He’s only a few parking spots down.

His face still looks bad, but it looks worse when he scowls, and Harrington’s got his phone out and is looking down at it with a face like he wants to drive over it. Not off to a good start.

“Hey, Harrington,” Billy makes sure to call out a couple paces behind. He doesn’t want to spook him or whatever.

Harrington’s been pretty jumpy lately, and Billy doesn’t want to think about why.

Brown hair flops around like a shampoo commercial, caught in the fall wind, and Billy smells apples. Harrington turn his scowl to Billy.

“Hargrove. What do you want?”

Billy stops a couple steps away from him, takes a drag of his cigarette. He figures asking for permission to talk to him isn’t going to go well, and it’s a pussy move besides. Billy Hargrove is no pussy.

“I’m sorry. About the TikTok. I asked Tommy to take it down but he’s being a dick about it,” Billy says.

Steve’s got a half smile on his face, but it’s not a nice one. “You asked him?”

“What, did you want me to beat him up?”

Harrington raises his eyebrows and points at his own face, incredulous.

“A little surprised you’re capable of words, actually.”

Billy huffs, looking away. His cigarette’s burned down to ash, and he flicks it to the ground. Billy figured Harrington would be difficult about it, he figured he’d have to keep his temper in check. So far, so predictable. His chest’s already feeling warm under his shirt, armpits sweating.

“Look,” Billy says, after a deep breath. “I’m sorry about how shit went down that night. I took things too far. I should’ve stopped once you were down.”

“You should’ve stopped once I was down?” Harrington all but yells, and he steps closer to Billy, that King Steve fire flaring up in him again. The heat in Billy’s chest answers, spreads, warms his neck.

“You lied to me about my sister being there, Harrington. You deserved at least one hit,” Billy gets up in Steve’s face, nostrils flaring. “And you threw the first punch.”

Harrington’s face is tight under the bruising, scowl deep and punishing, like he’s judge and jury of everything that’s fair in the world. Like he gets to be the judge of Billy Hargrove.

“Are you going to throw it now, Hargrove?” Harrington asks, mouth a flat line. His face is right up against Billy’s, noses almost touching. “Right in the middle of the parking lot? Gonna make another video with Hagan?”

Billy feels his face drop like someone’s flipped a switch on him, his chest goes cold. The back of his neck feels clammy. Billy takes a step back, then two.

“Fuck,” He rubs a hand over his face. “Fuck.”

Billy grabs another cigarette with a shaking hand. Steve watches him light it and take a long drag. He doesn’t say anything and his expression doesn’t change, he just follows Billy with his eyes as he smokes sense back into himself. He almost lost it again.

“I came here to apologize,” Billy says, once he gets himself together. “And to make you an offer.”

“An offer,” Harrington repeats, voice flat.

Billy hesitates. Bites his lip. Here goes nothing. “Yeah. Look, my account’s doing better since Tommy’s video went viral. Your Insta, too, I checked.”

“So, what? We lean into it?” Harrington says, incredulous. “My content’s family friendly, man, I can’t do that.”

“No, dipshit,” Billy snaps. If Harrington can just let him fucking speak. “We could start making some content together. Start showing up on each other’s social media. Youtube vídeos, streams, instagram. We can get your channel to how it used to be.”

“My channel’s doing fine, Hargrove,” Steve looks offended, looks angry. His fist is balling up where he’s holding his backpack.

“It will be helping me too, Harrington,” Billy admits, much as it pains him. “I can’t exactly make surfing content from fucking Indiana. I need material.”

Steve shakes his head, “Thanks for the offer, but I’m doing alright on my own.”

“It’ll make the story blow over if we look like we’re friends,” Billy almost shouts, stepping forward when it looks like Steve is about to back away towards his car. He doesn’t know why he wants this so badly. He should cut his losses and back off. “Hagan can’t push anymore videos if we show up online looking like buddies on each other’s channels. We can control the story. I don’t know about you, but I’m in hot water with a sponsor about this shit.”

Steve actually pauses. He looks Billy up and down, frowns at him with his entire body, it seems. Billy would give more than a penny to know what Harrington’s thinking, what he thinks of Billy in that moment. Billy doesn’t like making himself this vulnerable, can’t shake the feeling of wanting to curl his limbs back into his clothes like they’re a turtle shell and hide from everything, but he crossed a line and he fucked up. Now he’s gotta put it right.

“Alright,” Steve tucks his hair back behind his ear, a gesture that looks oddly vulnerable after the aggressiveness of the conversation. “Okay, we can try it out. But we back out before we actually kill each other.”

“Done,” Billy agrees, and he had to actually try to keep himself from smiling. “We gotta meet up to come up with some ideas. You free this week?”

Steve pulls out his phone and swipes through it for a bit.

“Yeah. Um, Thursday? After school? We can meet at the diner.”

“Yeah, I can do that,” Billy nods. He feels awkward now, having said what he wanted to say. He should go, but he oddly doesn’t want to. “I’ll drop Max at home and meet you there.”

“Okay.”

“Okay.”

And that’s too much for Billy.

“Well, see you around, amigo,” He says, and turns right around and heads back to the Camaro. He lights another cigarette on the way.

That was good, he thinks, climbing into the front seat to wait for Max. If it works, he can make up for his mess and maybe salvage his TikTok at the same time. It won’t be the same, but it won’t be years of his life wasted either.

He smokes his cigarette like it’s a lifeline, and turns on the radio in his car. He can’t mess this up now. He can’t mess this up. It’s just a little over six months until he can hightail out of here and back to California, where he can get his life back.

He can last that long.

[winchester101]

I wonder if doflamingo and law ever had to be in warlord meetings together when they both held the title, could you imagine it would be like catty pta moms because they can’t actually air it all out in front of the government so instead it’s like "oh law you’re here I see you've brought your second rate cupcakes as usual, wheres the rest of your dweeb brigade? waiting on that sad little submarine?" Law already drawing his sword, "WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST SAY BEPO SPENT ALL NIGHT MAKING THOSE YOU FUCK, WHY DONT YOU CRAWL BACK INTO YOUR CORNER OF HELL WITH YOUR BAND OF IDIOTS YOU FREAK" *starts fighting*

[ikebanaka]

Can you imagine Law telling his relatively wholesome dweeb brigade that he’s gonna steal a hundred hearts and mail them to the government to get them off his back

[seeminglyseph]

listen you stupid little dweeb you’re gonna be my friend no matter how much you try to be intolerable. you ain’t seen the patience I got for intolerable. Honestly good for you bluntly telling us you came for your mom’s sake. That was totally not overly polite to avoid conflict and I’ll count that as a win.

You voice your displeasure you little shit. Childhood brother-friend-whatever means you are stuck with this idiot brigade.

[sailorvinus]

(for the mun) How do you properly deal with people possibly not liking you?

generally i don't give a shit about what some insecure, ugly ass, mentally and emotionally inept can't-make-an-appointment-to-the-dentist-over-the-phone-because-too-nervous headass dweeb on the internet has to say unless theyre giving me money or telling me how great i am which they should because i really am the moment and a legend i emerged from my mother's womb being top tier, an s rank, a greatest hit therefore no one can tell me shit

also im very pretty

as for irl im just gonna say this: ive never been called out of my name by someone genuinely better than me lol.

idk just stop caring???? why care anyway, who gives a shit

also ive been cancelled, called out, gotten brigaded on in massive skype chats, etc so much over the years that at this point im teflon like im waaaay beyond hurt fee fees at this point

[doctorgerth]

Writing Contest Winner (1st Place)

winner: @thenotsofantasticlifestory

prize: One Shot between 2,000 - 5,000 words with any character of choosing

description: The angsty journey of Law falling for Kiki (OC) while he treats her battle wounds.

ratings: general audiences

warnings: mentions of blood/gore, cursing, angst/comfort, lots of Law pining 

notes: this song gives me MAJOR Lawki vibes and helped me to write this one shot so take a listen if ya wanna! Hope ya like it, Sto!! ‘twas an honor to write for the wonderful ship that is Lawki  💕

One Shot

Word Count: 3931

“Get behind me!” Kiki called out to her comrades, using the last bit of her power to summon thick vines to attack at the enemy before them. Law heard her command as he watched helplessly from afar, defeating the few enemies left on his side of the battlefield before frantically shambling himself towards her. 

“Kiki, no!” Both Law and the crew cried out, but their pleas fell on deaf ears. With obvious strain, Kiki gathered up the remainder of her power, a haze beginning to distort her sight as she aimlessly attempted to protect her wounded friends. She didn’t think twice in sacrificing herself for them. But there was no use as the energy drained from her, giving the enemy an opening to attack. The enemy blasted, a blinding and deafening explosion enveloped her and the crew screamed helplessly as the wind threw them backwards violently. 

As soon as Law awoke from his brief black out, he scrambled amongst the rubble in search of her. Blood and sweat trickled down his body, dampening his clothes as he ached with each movement. He pushed forward, crawling and dragging himself across the jagged rocks, screaming out her name in desperate manners. The silence that answered was frightening. 

Suddenly, a strange, thick substance against his palms startled him. As he looked down, the blood that dripped from his hands made his skin run ice cold. His eyes trailed the stream towards Kiki’s unconscious, battered body. Ignoring the increasing pain, Law scurried towards her, frantically removing the bloodied debris that threatened to bury her whole. With weak fingers, he checked her pulse, a mixture of terror and relief when the faintest thumping bounced under his scarred fingertips. 

A dark thought flashed in his mind as he stared down at her, slowly losing hope. Only mere seconds long, but it pounded in his skull along with the erratic beating of his heart and left a haunting chill in the aftermath. The distant call of his name couldn’t tear him away from the way his trembling hands gripped at Kikoku snug against his hip.  

Would he do it?

* * *

Law was able to heal in no time. He needed to after all in order to focus on healing the rest of his crew and most importantly Kiki. There were a few minor aches and pains that would flare as he hurried between rooms, checking vitals and stitching up wounds, but Law always pushed through. At the end of the day, when he would enter her room, everything else seemed to subside. 

“Good evening, doctor.” She beamed, eliciting an odd tug at his heart that he didn’t quite like. Nevertheless, he returned her warm greeting with a small smirk, reaching towards the clipboard and eyeing at her bandages. 

“How are we feeling today, Miss Kiki?” 

“Just peachy! Check it out, I can stretch my left arm now!” Kiki slowly extended her arm out and Law winced as he witnessed her struggle to do so. 

“That’s not nece-”

“See? Look at it, it- ow, ow, ouch.” Kiki hissed and retreated her arm back into its resting position quickly, a clear display of disappointment in her expression. “Nevermind…”

Law sighed as he walked over to her bed, gently grazing against her bandaged arm as he settled it into its correct position against her stomach. His thin fingers felt oddly warm even through the layers of gauze, “You don’t have to prove anything to me, Kiki-ya.”

Law didn’t realize the way he stared at her longingly, but Kiki had noticed and a warmth spread across her face in response. She’d known Trafalgar Law well over a year now after agreeing to allow him to study her logia powers in exchange for helping her find her crew. She’d liked to think she knew him pretty well, but his suddenly soft gestures were unfamiliar and she wasn’t sure how to take them. The way the innocent contact made her tingle in excitement every single time was a little troubling. Kiki looked down at his own bandaged knuckles, clearing her throat, she asked, “Well how about you, Law? How are you feeling?”

As if coming out of a trance, he shook his head, taking a moment to process what she had asked. He removed his hand from her arm more quickly than he intended, and he mentally cursed himself, praying she didn’t get the wrong idea. Law took a few notes on the clipboard while studying her IV levels and taking out her checkup tools, “Don’t worry about me.” 

Kiki pursed her lips, studying him as he took notes. With each visit, Kiki noticed that Law grew increasingly strange. Some days he’d be awkward and distant, other days he’d be gentle and reassuring. I’m not dying, am I? Kiki thought to herself in mild panic. 

He stuck his hand out in a silent request for her arm. His long, nimble fingers curved around her bandaged wrist gently, almost stroking it as he wrapped the cuff around her. That familiar warmth ignited in her cheeks as she assumed this was a gentle Law day. Not that she minded that side of him. It was always welcomed, just a little alarming as she couldn’t figure out why he had changed so drastically from the cold, aloof Law she initially met. 

As he pumped, the two tried to focus their gazes on anything but each other. The ticking of the clock overhead pounded like drums, impending anxiety making the room seem devoid of oxygen. She wanted to say something, anything, but the hold he had on her was somehow draining all coherent thoughts. After a few more agonizing moments of silence, his low voice whispered out, “Kiki-ya, I-”

Her ears perked up, eyes darting over to look at him curiously. Law’s eyes were downcast as he watched the needle tick. He was hardly even reading her pressure anymore, frozen in place as images of her bloody, wounded body suddenly flooded his mind. The panic of trying to find her when the smoke cleared, the fear for her life as he spent extensive hours operating on her. All the open wounds and blood that stained his hands. The painful shrieks as he cut her open and stitched her up. The sleepless nights and endless studying of how to improve her healing, how to take all the pain away. The brief moments of fearing a life without her. All haunting thoughts came crashing onto him as he stared at the bandages, remembering how ghastly the wounds looked underneath. It was agonizing, as with each of her cries and screams during treatments, Law wanted to reciprocate ten times over. Seeing her in so much pain was something he never wanted to witness again and thankfully the worst of her treatments were over. But how many more times was she going to get hurt because of him?

“Law.” A soft voice called out in the darkness. The voice sounded like sunlight personified, making the rolling storm in his head dissipate with her entrance. He wanted to hear it forever, bask in the warmth of that comforting lull of his name. It’s what always brought him out of the unforgiving depths of his mind. 

He blinked twice as he came to, his teary vision refocusing on her and the pained look she offered him. A warmth against his cheek startled him, and he flushed immediately after realizing he was caressing her palm against his cheek in a comforting manner. Clearing his throat, he uncuffed her arm and placed it awkwardly beside her, trying his hardest to ignore the crave for her warmth at the loss of contact.

“Your readings are good. I’ll be back to check on you later.” Law couldn’t possibly look her in the eye anymore, especially after that embarrassing exchange. Who knows what she thought of him now. He scribbled the information down quickly before speed walking towards the door, eager to get some fresh air before he suffocated. As he reached for the knob, she called out to him again, halting him in place.

“You know you can tell me anything. Right, Law?”

He gripped at the knob as a cold shudder coursed through him. Her kind words were meant to be a reassurance, solace, but he knew them to be lies. He couldn’t possibly tell her anything, especially not how he truly felt about her, no matter how bad he wanted to. A sudden barrage of knocks startled the both of them. Law opened the door to an eager Shachi, Penguin, and Bepo.

“How is she today? Can we see her?” As their eyes averted to Kiki sitting up in bed, they instantly rushed in with child-like excitement, “Kiki, we brought cards again!” 

Law didn’t have to turn around to see the bright smile on her face. He could hear it in her voice, “Good! I look forward to kicking your asses again in poker.” 

The trio hurried over to her, protesting against her confidence and getting settled for another night of cards. As she smiled, they couldn’t see the worried eyes she burned into Law’s back as he exited the infirmary with quiet shuffles. 

As Law stepped into the hallway, he took a big gulp of air, embracing the way it filled his tensed lungs and brought life to his stiff body. Normally, he would’ve been annoyed by their antics. He was admittedly a little jealous each time the crew exchanged some personal time with Kiki. Whether that was the dweeb brigade card games, Bepo napping with her, or even Ikkaku having some afternoon tea with her, Law envied all of them. Each visit from him was scheduled and dry, bringing nothing but checkups and awkward exchanges. He wanted to be fun, he wanted to bring her joy during her recovery, but all he would ever be was her doctor; her means of transportation until she found her crew. He hated to admit that it hurt him, because over time, he came to realize he wanted to be so much more. 

Law leisurely strolled down the hallway, hands in his pockets, and eyes focused on the floor. The clicking of his boots echoed within the sub walls and he was left alone in the chilly darkness once again. He tried to focus on anything except her, but lately Kiki has been the only thing to occupy his mind. He made a few rounds of checking on other members of the crew as temporary distractions before returning to his office. As he opened the door, he jumped a little at the figure that loomed over his desk before recognizing the all too familiar silhouette.

“Ikkaku, what the hell are you doing here?”

She remained silent for a moment, studying the notes on his desk before turning to him, arms crossed tightly against her chest, “When are you gonna tell her?”

“Who?” An annoying, defensive tone cracked in his voice, making him grimace in response. He always hated that about himself.

“You know damn well who, Captain.” She sighed impatiently.

“Don’t be annoying.”

“Don’t be a wuss.”

Law pinched at the bridge of his nose, feeling pure agitation bubble up in his system. Only Ikkaku could rile him up like this. She always tried to act like a know-it-all big sister and it always pissed Law off, even if she was usually right, “I don’t have time for this, Ikkaku. Get out.” 

“Why? So you can get back to your pathetic pining?” Ikkaku grasped at the notes on his desk, flailing around all of the embarrassing poems, doodles, and scribbles of Kiki’s name. He tried to deny all of it while he reached out desperately to retrieve them, snarling at Ikkaku and her defiant behavior.

“Get out!” Law was inches from her face, a threatening look in his eyes as he snatched the papers away and pointed towards the door.

Ikkaku tried to stand her ground, but ultimately sighed and shoved her way past him, “You can’t hide your feelings forever, Captain. I’m just trying to save you from heartache.”

How was she so confident a confession wouldn’t lead to heartache? Law plopped down exasperatedly onto his chair, shoving the papers into the trash bin under his desk, “Wait, Ikkaku-ya.”

She immediately stopped at the door, eyeing him over her shoulder as she awaited his next words. 

“How did you know? Am I that obvious?”

She scoffed with a confident smile, “A lady always knows when a man is in love.” She paused and turned to him, leaning against the door frame, “And yeah, you’re pretty obvious, Captain. Like a sad little lovesick puppy. It’s embarrassing.”

He groaned helplessly as he planted his hands roughly against his face and tugged at the bottom of his tired eyes, “Do you think she knows?”

Ikkaku stood in thought for a moment, revisiting all of her past conversations with Kiki in her brain as she searched for any significant conversations. A small smile graced her lips, “It’s never obvious when it’s us that a man is in love with.” With that, Ikkaku waltzed away.

Her words were meant to offer some wisdom, Law was sure of it, but it only offered him further confusion and hopelessness. He thumped his head against his desk, sighing dramatically as he tried to calm his racing heart. Even the mere thought of confessing to Kiki was enough to nearly send him into cardiac arrest. He just had so many things to fear. He had convinced himself that in his case, the cons heavily outweighed the pros, even if that meant Law being sad and lonely for the rest of his life. 

Kiki was just temporary after all. He only agreed to have her on board and help her find the Straw Hats if she would let him experiment on her. Falling in love with her in the process was what he least expected and wanted. He had noticed after some time the way he grew fidgety around her, how her mere presence had his heart racing and face flushing. She made him blush and daydream about all kinds of embarrassing things, and Law was not a blusher. All of this wasn’t like him, he’d always been calm and collected, but the mention of her name had him sweating buckets and desperate for air. In typical Law fashion, he tried to find a logical reason behind his odd mannerisms. But emotions were much more complicated than he realized. 

He couldn’t come to terms with the four letter word until that day; the day he almost lost her. Night after night, as he relived her moment of attack in each of his nightmares, all he could think about was the solemn realization that passed through his mind as he stared down at her near lifeless body. He could use his immortality power over her. Even if she didn’t want it, even if that meant leaving everything behind, Law came to the realization that he would have easily sacrificed himself for her sake. He would’ve died so she could live. 

It was a truly sobering thought to say the least, considering he’s never thought about going that far for anyone else before. That’s what terrified him the most, the fact that he’s found someone worth throwing everything else away for. He was constantly at war with himself over the idea. He was a captain, he had goals and dreams, other people to care for. He couldn’t just let someone like her in, there was hardly room in his damaged heart for someone like her anyway. He was selfish and cruel and unlovable. She was warm and bright and deserved all the love in the world. He couldn’t possibly provide that for her. So he’d tried over and over to forget about it, but every time he walked in that room, every time she gave him that goddamn smile, he couldn’t help but go weak in the knees. An intense feeling of wanting to give her everything he had just to keep that precious smile on her face…

Law looked up at the clock. It had already been two hours since that exchange with Ikkaku and she was right, all he did was pathetically pine. With a disgruntled sigh, he arose from his chair and made his way to Kiki’s room once more. 

How would he tell her? Should he just come out with it? Was it inappropriate of him to confess now, when she’s helpless in a hospital bed? What would she think of him? What if this ruined everything? His hand shook as it reached out towards the knob, his beating heart deafening his crowded mind. What a pain this entire ordeal was.

A shriek and the sound of items falling from inside the room jolted him out of his thoughts and he frantically opened the door. He instantly found Kiki curled up on the floor, grasping at her knees and wincing in pain, “Kiki-ya!” Law rushed over to her, helping her rise to her feet and watching the tears trickle onto the floor. He couldn’t stand the sight, that feeling of wishing he could take all her pain away returned in the pit of his stomach. 

“I’m s-sorry, Doc…” She huffed with a broken chuckle as he laid her gently in the bed. The blood soaking her bandaged arms brought painful memories, and though he tried his hardest to suppress it, a protective anger accidentally burst from him.

“What the hell were you doing out of bed? I told you at least two more weeks of bed rest, idiot!” He hissed through gritted teeth as he started to cut at the bandages, reaching over for more gauze on the bedside table. 

She couldn’t look him in the eyes, “I was just seeing if I could stand…”

“Why?! Are you trying to hurt yourself further? Do you want to stay in this bed forever?!” 

Not an invitation, not an invitation. Law was screaming now and he couldn’t do anything to prevent it. How stupid of her to try to stand on legs she hasn’t walked on in weeks! Though he chastised her, it was only masked worry as he couldn’t bear the thought of her getting hurt anymore. 

“I’m trying to heal faster! If I just continue to lay here then I’ll only get weaker!”

“Don’t you think I’m trying to heal you? I wish for once you’d stop being so damn stubborn and let me help you!” 

“You don’t have to treat me like a child! And quite frankly Law, you’re not my captain.” She barked back, snatching her arm away from him as soon as he finished re-bandaging, ignoring the sharp pain that elicited in response. 

He stood from his position, “Fine by me. I wouldn’t want someone as insolent and careless as you in my crew anyway.” 

Stop, stop, stop. Why was he spouting things he didn’t mean? 

“Big words coming from you. Have you forgotten why I’m in this bed in the first place?”

He winced as he wished he could in fact forget why she was there, forget how much it hurt him to see her so helpless and in pain. How he’d give anything to make it all stop, “No one asked you to be foolish and risk your life like that!”

“Foolish? You think me protecting your crew was foolish?”

“Kiki-ya, you were nearly dead when I found you! Why would you just throw away your life like that?” Coming from the man who almost threw away his own life for hers; the words didn’t taste well in his mouth.

“I protected them because I love them!” She cried out, voice beginning to break. “Damnit, Law, everyone’s been thanking me and praising me for my actions and all you do is yell at me! Y-you’ve been weird, Law! Ever since that battle happened, you’ve been treating me differently!”

“You want me to thank you?” How could he possibly do that? Ever since her attempted sacrifice, he’s been in nothing but distress trying to care for her and heal her wounds; worrying night and day about nothing except her. If anything, she should be thanking me! 

“I just don’t understand why you would hate me for trying to save your crew!” 

Law groaned loudly as his hands flew up to his hair, tugging at the roots in frustration as he bellowed out, “Hate you? How do you still not get it? I love you, Kiki! Why the hell would I thank you for nearly killing yourself? God damnit, I almost sacrificed myself for you!” 

A cold chill enveloped Kiki’s body at his words as they echoed in screams throughout the room. Law tried to calm his ragged breathing from his sudden outburst, slowly realizing what he had just confessed. 

“You love me?” The phrase sounded utterly baffling rolling off her tongue, unfathomable.

“Don’t say it like it’s the most disgusting thing you’ve ever heard.” He scoffed, eyes averting away from her. He could feel his fists clenching and releasing as pure anxiety coursed through him. He didn’t expect a response, but the uncomfortable silence she offered was more disheartening than a verbal rejection.

“Law.” Kiki called out, emitting rays of light amongst his clouded mind once more. Even as she broke his heart, he still melted at the way she said his name, “Come here.”

Slowly, he looked towards her in disbelief. An unreadable expression was plastered on her face as she patted the space in the bed beside her. Law hesitantly obeyed and sat on the bed, back facing towards her. She gently raised up and placed her forehead against his back, focusing on his breathing. 

“Do you mean that?” She whispered, an undeniable fear of him taking it all back caused a tightening feeling to pinch her throat. 

“Yeah.” He replied casually, still unable to look at her. His thoughts raced as he anticipated rejection, mentally preparing himself for the impending heart ache. 

She placed a hand on his shoulder, gently pulling him back towards her. He couldn’t help but oblige and turned to face her more comfortably with a solemn look in his eyes. Her hands cupped at his cheeks and he couldn’t help but lean into it, soaking in her warmth for what he believed would be the last time. 

“I’m sorry for making you worry about me.” She whispered as everything finally began to make sense to her. Law’s change of behavior, his incessant worrying and gentle advances, it was all displays of love. She cursed herself for being so inconsiderate towards his feelings. Though she was still a bit too overwhelmed by the sudden confession to reciprocate, she hoped that the comfort she offered would help put his mind at ease, “I promise to be more careful from now on.”

Holding his face in both hands, she couldn’t deny how cute he looked in that moment; cheeks squished together, an adoring gleam in his eyes as he embraced the intimate contact. She could feel her perspective of him slowly morphing into something beautiful and she didn’t dare try to fight it. Kiki leaned in and placed a gentle kiss against his forehead; a tender affirmation that Law couldn’t help but blush freely at, all for her eyes to see. 

“It’s late, go get some sleep.” She smiled as she playfully pushed him off of the bed, heart fluttering at the smile and low chuckle he offered in response, “You better rest well, because tomorrow I want to hear all about how much you love me.” 

[thenotsofantasticlifestory]

This is their canon friendship and I will die on this hill

[zoromance]

it’s so hysterical to me how trafalgar law has this horrific reputation and he’s known for being a ruthless torturer but. he shows up everywhere being followed around by the dweeb brigade with their dumbass hats and an overapologetic talking polar bear

[scooptroop]

Congrats to Bang Rodgman for his inclusion on this list! At least someone from the HH universe is getting recognized.

47. Nite Wolf/Jack Furz

Ben Rodgers, a.k.a. Bang Rodgman, is easy to underestimate. At the Upright Citizens Brigade, he’s used his deep voice, chiseled face, and affable Everyman vibe primarily to trick listeners of shows like Hollywood Masterclass and ActionBoyz into thinking he’s normal. Then, in the guise of characters like failed restaurateur Russell Karate or news-station cameraman Jack Furz, he quietly reveals the depths of his insanity. Even for Rodgers, Furz is strikingly nutz, a fame-obsessed dweeb who moonlights none too secretly as the masked vigilante Nite Wolf, then photographs himself mid-crime, à la Spider-Man. Two appearances deep, he’s quickly become Rodgers’s signature character and will undoubtedly appear on the show again soon. —SM

[tagduel]

      dweeb  brigade  aka.   YuGiOh!!  multimuse  here  ღ                           written && loved by gwyn 

[fictionalsadist]

Prideshipping based off this prompt form @corvidprompts

"I think my whole body just inverted itself.” Seto quietly grumbled as he pinched the bridge of his nose.

“No, that’s just the second-hand embarrassment.” Yami responded, the amusement rolling off him in waves.

“I knew I should have never let your little friendship brigade test the game at the same time…” Seto sighed as the paused recording

The new game was a virtual pod game where the players played as duel monsters. Seto must have skipped a meal and been suffering from low blood sugar when he'd agreed to let the whole Savior complex squad test it.

In true dweeb patrol fashion the moment the geoup had come across a high level dungeon Joey had charged in without a plan. Tristan had followed the dumb blond without question. After a moment's hesitation Yugi and Tea had followed them. Then as Tristan and Joey had bullheaded their way through the high level monsters Tea and Yugi had used up all of their mana on healing spells and by the time the lot of them got to the final boss the lot of them were low on hp. The last battle would have been a slaughter if it hadn't been for a forced log out when the game frozen the moment the boss monster had tried totspeak

Yami draped himself over his boyfriend's back. “Well, at least you know that there's a something seriously wrong with the game there. Now you can fix it.”

Seto decided against grumbling about how he paid the game design teams enough to make sure that glitches like that were fixed before they were sent to testing.

“If it makes you feel better I'm pretty sure that Tea is gonna hand Joey and Tristan their asses for that stunt.”

Yami's voice was right in his ear and made Seto relax. If only a little.

“No. But it's a start.” Seto told Yami before reaching around to pull the former spirit into his lap. “Distract me.” Seto demanded.

“Oh? Shall I tell you that Joey completely ignored his special skill and-”

Seto cut Yami off with a kiss. Seto tried to take it deeper but Yami kept it teasingly light.

“DO YOU TWO UNDERSTAND JUST HOW MINDBLOWINGLY IDIODIC YOUR ACTIONS WERE? I THOUGHT YOU GOT OVER THAT KIND OF IMPULSIVNESS!”

Tea's shriek probably shouldn't have reached them two floors up in the observation room but Seto figured that she had effectively killed his mood. Yami obviously found the whole thing hilarious because he dissolved into giggles.

Two years ago if you had told Seto that Yami- the only person on the face of this earth who could defeat him. The only person to not only earn his respect but keep it - giggled? Seto would have sewn their mouth shut with a rusty needle.

He will never admit in a million years that he also finds it cute.

“Shall we pick this up tonight?” Yami asked when he caught his breath. “Your place?”

“Sounds like a plan.” Seto agreed.only mildly disappointed.

“Good. Now we should go. Yugi won't be able to hold Tea back forever.” Yami urged. “Unless you want to have to spend money cleaning up two corpses.”

Seto followed with a grunt. Saying nothing about how it would almost be worth it to never have to hear the dogs barking again. But only because that would make Yami refuse to come over tonight.

This whole love thing was really making him soft.

[maxknightley]

tumblr bot: [makes single seemingly-coherent post in the middle of a massive sea of posts ranging from "make sense if you squint" to "utterly nonsensical"]

the dweeb brigade: NOT A BOT. NO BOT COULD MAKE A POST THIS GOOD RANDOMLY. I DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW LARGE NUMBERS WORK.

[btsinspirationtakesme]

Fall Forward (Intern Series 2)

Summary: The shy but determined intern at BigHit catches Taehyung’s eye.

Genre: RomCom angst.

Part 1

The next morning you decided to make it up to Taehyung, who you hoped hadn’t suffered any physical injuries from the screaming girl. You noted how Ms. Ryeri said he like sugary iced coffee, so popped into Starbucks on your way to work to get him his favourite special. 

“You know how much sugar is in this, that’s not gonna be good for your waist line.” The barista said after you paid for the order. 

“Thanks for your concern.” You muttered, not quite giving a shit about why it concerned the frat dweeb serving coffee. 

“Here you go.” He said after a while of your fiddling on your phone trying to look busy waiting for your order. 

You shot him a look, and sipped the drink in defiance. 

How could Taehyung drink coffee so sweet, your scowled as the syrupy taste and sugar reached your mouth. 

You made your way to BigHit ready for another day of work, clocking in your personal access code like every other day and shivering slightly at the air con that was always too cold. 

You checked the ipad again for Taehyung’s schedule, he was supposed to be at one of the recording rooms in twenty minutes on floor two. Having more time, you decided to get there early so maybe you could prep your apology in advance. You tried to memorise his schedule once you had settled down again, and gave yourself a mental pep talk not to freeze up like you did yesterday, or spew stuff you didn’t want to say. You could do this. You could do this. You kept prepping yourself. You were a little shy, that was all. He didn’t need to see that. 

The door creaked open. 

Oh god, you didn’t want to see his beautiful face. 

“Hi.” He said, smiling. He was too good. You expected a burst of outrage, but he gave a polite smile. 

You couldn’t erase the look of worry on your face. 

“Don’t you speak?” He laughed. 

You nodded furiously. 

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have left you there. It’s just that the girl screams, like she yells the house down and I was mortified i bumped into you!” So much for spewing stuff out. 

Taehyung took a seat right opposite you, that smile still edged on his face. 

“Do you always get this nervous?” He asked. 

Your eyes widened and you felt the tips of your ears burn.

“No.” 

You sipped the ice cold sugary concoction in front you. 

“Oh shit! This is for you.” You pushed the beverage in his direction. 

Oh shit, he wouldn’t drink that would he? You had already taken a sip, not once but twice. 

“Ah, it’s yours.” He said, as if it was the most obvious thing ever. 

“No, I got it for you but here’s the thing. This dweeb, actual frat boy dweeb at Starbucks was all like ‘you better watch your waist line drinking that’ and I got annoyed so I had a sip in front of him to piss him off, so I hope you don’t mind. It was all in the interests of annihilating frat boy dweeb smiles.” 

Your cheeks were burning. Where was your verbal filter, you were supposed to have one like every other sane human. 

You really weren’t sane, not around this guy clearly. 

Taehyung didn’t say anything, but simply smiled and took a sip. The sound of his sipping nerved you.

“Mmmm, I also taste cherry.’

You licked your lips instinctively. You were wearing cherry gloss that probably transferred onto the straw. 

Kill me now. You begged from above. 

Your cheeks were probably on fire, they’d have to call the fire brigade. 

“I’m so sorry.” You squeaked. This was going to haunt you for the rest of your life.

“Don’t be, I love cherry.” He winked, finishing the drink in what seemed like one gulp. That was a lot of sugar down in one go. Your cheeks felt like they were swelling, your were close to hyp-

“Ahhh…time for work.” He said casually streching his arms getting up.

“Hyungs are getting here a little later, which is why I’m going to be doing a bit of recording for some songs myself.” He said, getting up and stretching his arms. 

“I-is there anything I can get you?” You asked, trying to press down the red on your cheeks. 

“Just stay by my side at all times, that crazy intern might come back.” He said seriously. That reminded you of your biggest task that you were preparing yourself for, the apology. 

“Uh, I’m sorry for leaving you like that. She just…pounced.” You blurted. 

“It’s okay. I heard you called security, it was the right thing to do.” He said.

“I promise it won’t happen again.” You said trying to re-assure him he wouldn’t have to be worried. 

“I don’t expect it will, unless you’re hiding something.” He joked. 

You followed his instructions diligently, making sure to follow his every step from room to room. You observed how he worked, often sporadically. It was interesting, Taehyung was very dutiful which threw you off. You expected him to be forgetting things, making mistakes but on his own he was really a professional. He had all his lyrics ready, made amendments to them, the complete opposite of his camera personality. 

His workflow was pretty impressive. 

“Ah, took you guys long enough!” Taehyung joked, as the door opened to reveal the rest of BTS. 

“Ahh, there’s so much traffic downtown we literally couldn’t move.” Yoongi, dressed in slacks and a cap said as he took a seat near the studio. 

They all gave you polite smiles and hellos on recognising you were in the room and you reciprocated. Strange, you were perfectly normal if not your usual shy self with the others. 

Taehyung threw you off. 

You continued to work pretty comfortably for the rest of the morning, avoiding having to speak to Taehyung and it was only after 4 where his next activity would be without his members. 

“You have a script reading.” You muttered, trying to get his attention away as he conversed with Jimin. 

“See you guys at home. Don’t wait up for me.” Taehyung said pushing his chair back and walking ahead of you. You followed him out of the room and towards the elevator. 

Floor 12. That was an awfully long elevator ride.

“So, what do you do…apart from interning?” He asked, making conversation. You were both at opposite ends of the elevator, more of your decision than his.

“I’m an English major.” You replied. 

“Smart. Namjoon hyung would love to ask you about some of the books he picked up from this english book store.” Taehyung was really social, you wanted to ask him more but figured you would probably say something you’d regret.

You simply smiled.

Floor 12 really needed to hurry up. 

“That’s weird.” You muttered, it shouldn’t take a minute to get to floor 12. It was far, but it wasn’t that far. 

“Everything okay?” Taehyung asked. 

Your furrowed your eyebrows. “Yeah, it’s just…” You moved towards where Taehyung was, which was behind the buttons on the elevator. 

You were about to press the buttons again, but a sudden jolt of the elevator sent you right into Taehyung’s body and the floor suddenly started shaking. You gripped whatever you could to steady yourself, resting on something that felt like…fabric and hardening fabric?

Weird.

“Ow!” Taehyung yelled, and you shot your head towards him. His hands had gripped your shoulders steadying himself but that still didn’t erase the look of pain on his face.

“What is it, are you okay?” You asked, panicked.

“Fine…” He said slowly, face contorted in pain.

“Your hand’s squeezing my dick.”

You gasped, realising what your hand was gripping onto. You looked down, seeing the evidence for yourself and found your hand was so tighty gripped on it, your knuckles had a difficult time flexing to remove your hand. 

“Ouch.”You said removing your hand. 

If anyone, Taehyung was the one in pain.

Once again, mortification washed over you. No, screw that. Mortification was a light word for this situation. You didn’t deserve to be moritified. You needed help, the reason why was taken out from your mind before you even thought of it.

“How the hell did you manage to grab my dick when anyone else would have grabbed my arm?” Taehyung asked, eyes wide in shock as he looked at you. 

“Are you one of those girls, the ones that are all coy until they find a guy alone?” He pressed further. 

You slowly backed away. 

“No, no running this time.” Taehyung blocked your path.

“It…was just…I mean it was just there and really hard like a handle pointing out.” 

Verbal filters did not exist when it came to Kim Taehyung. Your reply was met with more incredulity from him, and a freaked out ‘hey!’ was what Taehyung could manage. His eyes widened in shock, he put his hands on his hips as he tried to contain his shock and anger.

You’d be offended too, if your PA just told you your dick was hard in an elevator pointing towards you. 

-End of Part 2-

[xenodile]

I am so tremendously disappointed that the playable Demon Hunters are all loser dweebs from Illidan’s fan club.

I mean Illidan is not THE demon hunter.  He was always known as A demon hunter.  That implies that there were others at some point, and Illidan was trained in his specific fighting style.  Especially considering he used to be a mage, and was not a physical fighter.

Why couldn’t the Night Elves just share that discipline that they developed with the other races?  Why do players HAVE to buy a membership to the Illidick Riding Brigade to be a demon hunter?

And if we HAVE to be Illidari, why is it only elves??  Why are there no draenei or human demon hunters?  You expect me to believe that in all the time that there were human and draenei refugees in Outland none of them were interested in whatever propaganda Illidan was spewing?  

AND WHILE I’M ON THE SUBJECT, the only night elves that would possibly be in Outland were the ones that followed Maiev in order to kill Illidan.  You’re telling me that the same night elves that abandoned everything and defied their leaders just to follow Maiev’s fanatical hunt just turned around and joined him??