➛ out of office hours
a/n: been craving a ceo!luci for so long so i decided to write it myself and i’m in love with him >_< am also thinking about him falling in love with you and i just—! <333333
tags: 4.2k words, ceo!lucifer x secretary!reader, female reader, dom!lucifer, oral sex (male and female receiving), rough sex, unprotected sex, cumming inside, ass slapping, degradation, praise, multiple orgasms, overstimulation. minors do not interact!
you always felt the need for professionalism in your role as a secretary. especially with a boss as hot as yours.
he was terrifying at first, you will admit that. but having the raven–haired man bare down at you with those unruly eyes was the most exciting thing about the job. from the beginning, he watched you closely, his gaze raking up and down your form, taking in the way you do things so perfectly.
your profession is simple enough; organising files, preparing his documents, reading and directing e–mails and scheduling all of lucifer’s appointments are the routine kind of things you do.
but every now and then, a splash of wild colour enters the monotonous life as a secretary, and you find yourself on your knees beneath your cold and grumpy boss.
“that’s it,” lucifer sighs. “just like that.”
today was a world–wind of emotions for both you and lucifer. as the ceo, he is bound to have days filled with stress. and on those days, your bound to feel it tenfold as you are the one doing all of the work behind the scenes, supporting him as best you can.
through all the excessively long and draining meetings and the ruthlessly hectic business environment, you both managed to make it back in the office, despite it being late into the evening, long after business had closed for the day.
he finishes up some work on his computer, work you will need to catch up on later, and hums from the warmth of your mouth running up and down his cock. he relaxes into his chair, no longer paying attention to his screen and looks down at you tucked snugly under his desk.
squeezed in the space between his thighs, you forge eye contact with him as he brushes his hair back with slender fingers, revealing a slightly sweaty forehead and reddened cheeks.
you’re aware of how hard he tries to maintain the classic ceo persona — an emotionless robot who cares only for money and power — but when he’s with you, when he’s fucking you and using you and allowing you to use him how you please….it’s a marvel, to say the least.
his blush is enhanced with the ruby glimmers in his irises but the dark, lustful entity behind those eyes spur you on.
a mixture of whispery groans and praises escape him and you take it as your signal to suck in harder, then to tease him by pulling back and swirling your tongue around his cock, paying extra attention to his sensitive tip before taking him whole in your mouth again.
“mmh….fuck, keep doing it like that.” he orders and you obey.
you wonder if the pleasure you thrust upon him is what takes his moodiness away. seeing him slip into his relaxed self, his greedy and self–indulgent self while he gets off on your mouth is surely a sight no one else would see.
as far as you know, you’re the only one who does these things with him.
not that it’s an exclusive relationship, but lucifer has expressed he would only do such things with people he trusts and you happen to be one of them. conveniently, the only one he has regular access to.
and that’s how this situation began.
it’s rare, but every now and then when either of you need relief, you use each other. there are rules in place, of course. there always are with a man like lucifer.
the typical things like no strings attached and no kissing.
but your least favourite rule is no fucking.
feelings, kissing and fucking: all three of them would decimate the professional boundaries you have in place.
but that’s not to say you don’t have fun without all of that.
using your hands and mouths on each other is satisfying enough. and the opportunity to even look at lucifer’s cock, let alone suck him dry, is more akin to a blessing.
the feel of his cock in your mouth will never grow old. you hollow your cheeks, sucking harder and humming so the vibrations can send waves of pleasure up his cock and into his body. he twitches, rutting his hips into you, no longer restraining himself.
his hand plants itself into you scalp, using your head as he pleases until hot cum blasts into your mouth and his hips stutter between your lips. you watch with wide eyes as his face contorts in pleasure, and you feel your panties grow more soaked in your arousal.
you had already removed your shoes and blazer, but while you swallow the remnants of lucifer’s cum, you unbutton your shirt and kick off your skirt, leaving your bra and panties for him to remove. he steadily reaches behind you, not breaking eye contact, and unclasps your bra.
his dark orbs finally move away from yours, only to remain stuck on you breasts and perky nipples. you don’t miss the swipe of tongue across his lips; he’s hungry.
pulling him from his trance, you work on his own shirt, unbuttoning and pulling it from him with zeal. he meets your eagerness by pushing you down on his desk, tracing his fingers over your ankles and up your calves. he leaves kisses along the inside of your thighs, promising to go further.
and when he reaches the apex, he chuckles softly at the soaked stain leaking through your panties. you bare your wetness proudly, and his cock twitches knowing it’s all due to him. one chaste kiss over your panties causes you to quiver and a moment later, your panties are ripped from you.
your pussy glistens in the dimmed light of his office and your boss, who is a man with little time, wastes none when it comes to devouring you.
his hot mouth collides with your already burning pussy and you whine wantonly. he slobbers all over you, mixing your arousal with his own saliva before sucking it all back into his mouth. his tongue tickles between your folds, swiping up and down and swirling circles at the top where your most sensitive part hides.
and just when your clit is ready to explode with pleasure and send it adrift throughout your body, he smacks harsh, wet kisses on your lips, sucking and nibbling like his life depends on it.
“fuck! lucifer!” you squeal. “please make me cum!”
he buries his head deep between your thighs and you lock him in. you yearn for release and grind your hips into his face, to which he responds by licking and sucking your pussy with more vigour. and as you rock your pussy on his face, the pleasure builds up and explodes in an electrifying burst.
ripples of exultation flood your body, nourishing your flesh with the meaning of true bliss; a cause for you nerves to jubilate and rejoice. sparks dance along your skin and lucifer pulls away, gasping between your trembling thighs with his face glossed over from your pussy.
he kisses his way up slowly, leaving marks on your stomach and giving special attention to your breasts. he eyes you as he takes each nipple one after the other, and sucks. falling onto your elbows, you throw your head back and attempt to catch your breath, but lucifer makes that difficult as his lips snake up the skin of your neck and capture your lips in his own.
the sweet taste of your essence coats your tongue, but what surprises you more is how casual lucifer’s lips feel against yours. it’s the first kiss you’ve shared, yet it feels like you’ve kissed him a million times before, like he’s the only man you should ever kiss.
tiny cracks appear in the set of rules. he shouldn’t have kissed you, and you most certainly should not be kissing him back.
but you wrap your arms around his shoulders, silently telling him you are fine with this. more than fine, actually. you would rather die than move away from him now.
wrapped so closely together, embraced in each other’s lips and arms, it feels like it should be no other way.
his tongue reaches in and toys with yours in a playful fight for dominance and you hope this forbidden kiss could last forever, but you pull back slight when his cock rubs against your sensitive clit.
a single look to him to ask what he is doing earns a single look from him, signifying what he wants next.
you shouldn’t.
you absolutely should not do this.
but no matter how many times you remind yourself how wrong it is in these few short moments, your body speaks for itself and you nod. lucifer’s shoulders visibly relax, as if he was scared you would say no.
you can’t feel guilty about this, not when lucifer wants it as much as you. he strokes his cock, eyes furrowed from the battle waging in his mind. he’s as conflicted as you, but in times like this, he is hopeless in the fight against his lust.
“are you sure you want this?”
“yes,” you gasp. “are you?”
“i wouldn’t have gotten this far if i didn’t.”
you hesitate for a moment, but he assures you with his charming words, whether they speak the truth or otherwise.
“you needn’t worry about the repercussions. this is purely for stress relief.”
you’re sure the sinking feeling in your chest is a bad sign, knowing it hurts that all of this is just for the release of pent up stress. but still, your body is greedy enough to bury that bitter hesitance deep down and replace it with more lust.
“then stop talking and do it,” you wrap your legs around him, pulling him closer so his cock prods your entrance. “don’t take your time with me, lucifer. i’m not a patient woman.”
his softness is gone instantaneously and like a flash of lightening, you are shocked by how quickly he can switch from his relaxed and vulnerable side to his authoritative and commanding façade.
“you ought to show more respect to your boss,” he leans down, close enough for his lips to graze your ear. “you’ve forgotten your manners.”
“i hardly think manners are necessary. with this, at least.”
“hm, well, you see,” he taunts. “i won’t give you anything unless you ask for it nicely. and you’re not a patient woman, so how long are you going to wait for it?”
you scoff, rolling your eyes. you’d gotten caught up in the heat of the moment, hoping lucifer would hop straight into fucking you senseless. but you forgot how much of a control freak he is, and how everything happens his way or it doesn’t happen at all.
you hoped the lenience and generosity he has for you would work in your favour, but apparently not.
“i don’t need to ask again,” he warns. “tell me what you want and say please.”
you bite your lip, glaring at him daringly but a single stern look puts you in your place and speaking the words you both desperately need to hear.
“please, i want you to fuck me.”
he stares you dead in the eye as he utters another order.
“say it again.”
“please, lucifer,” you whine. “fuck me, please!”
in a moment’s turn, he flips you so your feet touch the ground and his large hand on your lower back pushes you into the edge of his desk, while the other lines his cock with your sopping entrance.
he slips in, teasing you and earning a moan as he slowly rocks his hips, entering you further with each roll of his hips.
you push your body against him, and his cock digs further into your pussy. you keep rocking, both in unison until his cock is deep enough for you to scream his name.
“lucifer—ah!”
your squeal is cut short when he ruts into you again, slamming his hips against your ass and groaning from the tight warmth of your pussy enveloping his aching cock.
both of you are so lost in the wonders of each other’s body that the abrupt, high–pitched chiming almost goes unnoticed.
shrill ringing of the telephone on lucifer’s desk threatens to dampen the mood. but lucifer’s cock has only just entered and you’re not far away from the best part of the night. to hell with the phone call, lest it disturb your secret pleasure time with your boss.
“what are you waiting for?” lucifer rubs your hips with a subtle but notable thrust of his own. “aren’t you going to answer it?”
“what—ah?!” you gasp, doing your utmost to stay upright on his desk while he pounds into you. but your elbows have turned feeble from your orgasm, trembling as you try to hold yourself up with them. “i can’t do that!”
“answer it.”
his curt order is enough to make you obey, as is the harsh grip on your ass cheek. you lean over the desk a little further, reaching for the phone. this is a terrible idea but you can’t seem to break free of the spell lucifer has cast on you — you’d obey every last one of his orders.
“h–hello?”
in the process of lucifer figuratively rearranging your guts, he seems to have also turned your brain to mush and you cannot comprehend the words coming from the speaker.
all you can feel is lucifer, and how he hovers lower and lower, leaning down on your body until you’re squished between him and his desk. he grinds his hips into you, leaving chaste kisses along your shoulder blade and when he is flush against your ear, he whispers.
“focus.”
but you’re incapable of doing anything, including focusing on the phone call.
you have a client in one ear, and your boss in the other ear. neither of which can hear the other, but what is certain is that they can both hear you muffling your moans with a hand clasped over your face, and your entire body shakes as lucifer refuses to cease fucking you brainless.
“hello? is anyone there? i can hear you breathing.”
within seconds, you move the phone away from your mouth, ready to hang up but lucifer’s reflexes are quick enough to grab your arm and bring the phone back to where it was moments ago.
“answer him,” lucifer whispers. you shake your head with tight lips, holding your breath as to not make a sound while lucifer holds the phone against your face. and into the ear he has claimed, he orders, “speak. now. or i won’t let you cum.”
you open your mouth, swallowing in air before finally speaking.
“this is mr. morningstar’s office. how can i help?”
“i wish to speak with lucifer himself. this is urgent.”
your mouth hangs open, silent moans causing your body to convulse as lucifer grinds slowly and deeply in your pussy. you’re hanging on by a thin thread, but lucifer brings your attention back from your oncoming orgasm.
“you want to cum, don’t you? be a good girl and do your fucking job.”
lucifer pushes himself up and switches up his pace from slow ruts to harsh and fast thrusts. each of them knock the air out of you as you try to speak.
“i must apologise, sir. you’re calling during his out of office hours so unfortunately i can’t let you speak to him at the moment.”
“why the hell not?!”
“this is his personal—ah!” you stifle a yelp to the best of your ability, praying lucifer would have some mercy and not humiliate you — or allow you to humiliate yourself. “this is his personal time but i can pass on a message.”
the man continues to speak and with shaky hands, you reach for pen and paper, turning your moans from lucifer’s cock dragging in and out of your pussy into hums of acknowledgement in heed of the man’s queries. you only hoped they’re disguised enough to not spark intrigue on the other end of the line, because that would be the end of all the professionalism you held.
you slam the telephone into its holder, ending the call as quickly as possible.
“what the hell was that?” you whine, clenching down on lucifer’s cock as you near the bliss you’ve been longing for. your complaints are disrupted with stutters caused by lucifer’s thrusts. “do you have any idea how stupid that was?”
“you’re the one who answered,” he bites back, landing his hand down harshly on your ass once again. “not me.”
“you told me—ah! to answer!”
“and you could have refused.”
you lower your head, biting back a moan. you could have refused, but the outcome of tonight’s session would be a lot different if you didn’t answer. perhaps, lucifer might have stopped immediately, leaving you on the outskirts of blissful territory.
or alternatively, he may have begun to fuck you harsher, rougher, meaner; punishing you for not obeying his order. but you wouldn’t think of it as a punishment, as long as you get to cum.
“that’s right,” he continues. “you’re so desperate to cum, you don’t care if someone hears you getting fucked like a whore.”
an especially loud groan escapes you at the sound of the new nickname. you quite like the sound of it, but your body more so and lucifer can tell from the quivering walls of your pussy.
“you like that? you like being called a whore?”
“yes!”
“i fucking knew it.”
he thrusts impossibly harder and your body collapses, allowing him full control of your pleasure. and he gifts it to you on a golden platter.
“go on. you’ve been a good whore, so go ahead and cum,” he grunts. “cum for me. cum all over my cock like the desperate, pathetic bitch you are.”
“fuck! ah!” you can’t even warn him of your orgasm as you clench your walls, feeling his cock in greater detail as it rubs you in all the right places. “fuck, luci— feels so good!”
“that’s it, baby,” lucifer hums, emptying his own load in you. “good fucking girl.”
his words are dragged out, mellowed by the pure ecstasy he has found in your pussy. and your pussy, too, feels awestruck from the new sensations of him filling you up, not just with his cock but with his cum, too.
you’re taken over by bliss and warmth, limbs trembling from the sheer shock of it all. never had you imagined how one of your worst days would end with such astoundingly good sex. you ebb and flow with the pleasure, letting your body relax and the feelings to wither away slowly while you catch your breath.
but lucifer doesn’t give the feelings a chance to subdue and picks up the pace. with hands grounded in your hips, he pushes all of his might into one more round. the stickiness from your mixed arousals leaking out of your pussy allow him to fuck you with ease, and not minutes later, your screaming and thrashing with a new, heightened pleasure.
your tip–toes graze the floor, pressing into the ground as hard as you can to stabilise yourself. but lucifer fucks you ruthlessly and when he rips another orgasm from you, your legs fly up and outward and your hips rock against him and the desk in a most embarrassing manner.
your limbs flail and your body convulses and lucifer relishes, knowing he is the reason behind your wild pleasure. he wonders if anyone else could make you like this, to drive you insane with pleasure that you no longer have control over your body, even for the short–lived moment of him fucking you through your orgasm.
perhaps, that is why he keeps going. because he wants this moment to last forever.
having your tight pussy wrapped around him and your wildly beautiful moans filling his ears for eternity doesn’t sound bad at all.
but he, too, has limits and feels himself slow down. his thrusts become sloppy and gentle and his guttural groans are replaced with heavy breaths.
“fuck….” he gasps and he truly can find no other words. “fuck.”
collapsing into his chair, he watches your body twitching as you lay exhausted on his desk with you red ass on display and his cum dripping down your legs.
when you finally regain control over your limbs, you slowly rise, stretching to ease your muscle. but your whines and groans and the sight of your sullied body keep his cock hard for longer than he thought.
“are you alright?” he asks breathlessly. “rest longer if you need to.”
“no,” you state, looking at him over you shoulder before backing up. “we’re not done yet.”
lucifer is surprised. under the assumption that you would be as spent as he is, he does not expect you to find his cock and slip it inside of you again. but that’s exactly what you do.
“oh my god….” you moan, hypersensitive to any and all ministrations against your pussy. but still, you want more, you need more. “please, it’s so good!”
lucifer supposes he should let you continue bouncing on his cock given that he released all of his stress on you. the least he can do is allow you to use him until you’re satisfied. but that doesn’t stop him from grabbing your hips and guiding you up and down. his fingers fit into your flesh like second nature.
his added strength makes it easier for you, and you focus more on finding your next orgasm.
the usually quiet office of morningstar corporation’s boss is now filled will all sorts of obscenities — from your desperate gasps and moans to the squeaking of lucifer’s chair, and the abrupt slaps cutting through the air to the scuffling of paper on his desk when you grab onto it for stability as rapture fills you for the last time, teaching you that the joy and delight you find in melding your bodies together is the most sinful of utopias.
pleasure turns to pain, and pain turns to pleasure as you are overwhelmed with the orgasms you have endured.
lucifer’s hands snake around your waist, pulling you back into him with one hand straying to fondle your breasts. breathing in your scent, he grounds himself in you and you lay limp in his arms as all the glee and elation filling your body slowly slips away.
regaining your stable mind and body, you realise you and your boss have a lot of discussing to do. and what follows can either make or break the relationship you have with him as your boss and you as his secretary. all professional boundaries have been broken, and the flimsy rules you had in place to ensure your situation would not advance to the level it did tonight are left far in hindsight.
there’s not a single directive you left untouched. but knowing you broke all the rules, and that lucifer instigated most of it, is worrying as much as it is electrifying because you know that extra care and attention from lucifer isn’t just for the sex.
he appreciates your abilities outside of the sexual encounters you share.
as you would both understand, your role is merely to serve him and his company. he receives corporate aide from his directors but still, he trusts your intuition. he listens to your gut feeling as if it were his own.
he has a habit of asking your opinion when it comes to high–risk decisions, or urging you to tell him your opinion on a new client he had a bad feeling about. although you’re in his presence for admin only, lucifer ensures you are there for more than that.
that you are there for him and not just your job.
in more ways than one.
and he proved that tonight when he kissed you. the first rule of your arrangement was no feelings and no kissing. but lucifer, a man who lives by rules, had thrown it out the window. it only made you more curious as to what would come from it.
surely, you would stick to the scope of your professionalism. at least, what’s left of it. but his lips against yours, the soft drag of them across your skin, the sweet whispers that meant something entirely different after he kissed you….is it really worth the cost of losing your livelihood?
“we should do this more often,” he breathes into your mouth, enveloping your lips between words. “i’m beginning to despise how rare of an occurrence this is.”
“we do this often enough,” you warn him, rising from your place on his lap.
but he doesn’t let you escape. he grabs your wrist and pulls you back into him. your butt is awkwardly positioned near his softened cock but you rest your shoulder on his chest with your arms tucked between your bodies.
“if you don’t wish to do this again, then just say the word. but for now, let’s stay like this a little while longer,” he speaks softly into your hair. “i had a long day.”
“i did, too.” you hum.
his big arms wrapping around you feels foreign. but still, it feels natural to slide your head onto his shoulder and rest in his embrace. you have been intimate with lucifer in more ways than one, but this….sitting in his lap, bare and vulnerable, and holding him back while he kisses and caresses the skin on your neck and shoulders….it’s a different type of intimate.
a type of intimacy you never imagined he would be capable of.
“i hope i made your day better, even in the slightest.”
“trust me, lucifer,” you smirk. “you turned a really shitty day into a really good one.”
the both of you relish in each other’s soft laughter, but taking notice of the darkened sky has you realising this moment will soon come to an end, and you will need to part ways and pretend none of this ever happened, even the new additions to your extra duties to your ceo.
your heart sinks, knowing you have grown fonder of these encounters, fonder of the man beneath you. and you don’t want it to end despite all the alarm systems in your body telling you otherwise.
you ignore them for now, relishing in the warmth from lucifer while he is still here with you.
with a smug smile, you think to yourself: enjoy it while you can.
“and me?” you ask playfully, nudging him to open his eyes. “did i make your day better?”
you hear the soft inhale he takes, discreetly breathing in the air you give and allowing it to settle his beating heart and erratic nerves. you will never know, but even in your no strings attached relationship with him, you turned him from a purely lustful man into a man capable of love.
“yes,” he chuckles, and he looks at you in a way you’ve never been looked at before. lucifer is so adoring in his gaze. “you always do.”
you smile giddily. to yourself, or to him, you’re not quite sure. perhaps it’s the after–effects of your multiple orgasms that have you grinning and kissing him again. or maybe it’s a new chapter unfolding between you.
either way, the future of your position with him and the company is a lot less daunting when lucifer is close to you like this.
“how’s that for stress relief?”
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i bought a flat this week.
was off work sick last thursday/friday with what turned out to be the beginnings of a bad cold but at the time i was just like 'oh no why am i so tired is this the return of the Mystery Fatigue'
let's backtrack for a second!! back when i had the offer accepted on my flat my solicitor suggested october 6th as a move in date and i was like sure that works (this was around the beginning of september). then i didn't hear anything from them for many days and then i started getting major dry eye problems that became all consuming so i didn't get around to chasing them.
anyway!! tuesday last week i get an email from my solicitor like 'hi are you still able to complete friday' and i did not have the headspace to deal with it so i didn't reply
Wednesday my solicitor calls like 'hi. we need to know if you want to complete friday'. i'm like 'actually i'm really not feeling well this week, could we postpone'. she calls back a few minutes later like 'they cannot postone'. at this point i'm still thinking that if i get a decent night's sleep i'll feel better so i tell her i'll deal with it in the morning.
Thursday i feel spectacularly worse. have to get up to go to an appointment with my optometrist. almost start crying in their office bcos i'm just so exhausted. (he seemed weirdly unfazed by this?? looking back i wonder if he thought my eyes were hurting or something and didn't realise that i was holding back tears gfhglj) call out sick from work.
plan is to take a nap and then look at the documents my solicitor sent over but she calls me again like 'hi. sorry to bother you i know you're sick but can we complete today' so i'm like ah shit ig we're doing this now. please walk me through exactly what you need me to do here. 'we just need you to send us the money'. yeah i can do that. i've never made a payment this big before tho.
(i'm buying w money inherited from my mother so even for a flat purchase it's an unusually large amount of money)
'oh yeah you won't be able to that online. *pause* are you well enough to go to the bank?' i am tired enough that going to the bank will suck but not so sick i cannot go to the bank.
i had gone fully back to bed. spurred on by sudden wave of adrenaline, get out of bed and dressed and get the bus into town to the bank.
my bank closes at 3pm weekdays and by the time i get that it's about 1:45. explain the situation. turns out that to make a payment this big you need a sit-down meeting with a member of staff and they are booked solid till 3. 'can you come back tomorrow at 9:30 when we open' *dying inside* yes. i can come back tomorrow at 9:30.
go home. remember that i'd told my manager that i'd call her at 9 to let her know if i'm going to be working (i will defo not be working & she knows this) which will be tricky if i have to leave at 9 to go to the bank. have a pretty interminable IM conversation via microsoft teams about this wherein i suggest i message her first thing and call a bit later and she isn't going for it. eventually agree to call at 9 just so i can end the conversation and go to sleep.
Friday morning end up calling my manager from the bus. get to bank. whole thing takes a full 30 minutes so yeah i can see why they couldn't fit me in thursday afternoon ghfdljkfhdj. i'm so so tired. they have to go over a whole fraud prevention statement with you. 'you should be aware that scammers can pretend to be your solicitor'. me, exhausted: okay what if just this one time. a scammer is pretending to be my solicitor.
make the payment. go home to sleep finally.
later in the afternoon get another call from the solicitor. 'hi we have the keys you can come get them whenever'. oh yeah i'd been so caught up in trying to get them the money i'd kinda forgotten about. actually getting the flat.
(side note at no point was i planning to move in on 'moving day', an advantage of being a first time buyer is that i don't have to & i want to redecorate the place which is easier while it's empty)
initially say i'll come in next week but then realise that ideally next week i'll be back at work (i am not but anyway) so i might as well go now. it's pushing 4pm so will need to head out ASAP.
eyes are very dry and itchy from sleeping all day but fortunately i just (on a recommendation from my optometrist) bought a thing called a facial sauna which is a very weird contraption but does work extremely quickly.
pack my eye drops and also a peanut butter sandwich to eat in my new flat (why not) and go get the keys.
arrive at the flat. on inspection realise that the envelope i've been given seems to contain the most random assortment of loose keys. eventually identify an actual set of keys.
put my key in the lock of the flat door. abruptly hear a cat meowing, somewhere very close by.
previous owner had cats (plural) (i know this bcos i saw them when i was viewing the place). have a sudden moment of panic that i've somehow wildly misunderstood the whole situation and that she and her cats are still in residence.
look down. there is a very large, very fluffy white cat standing next to me, looking up at me as if expecting to be let in.
'you can't come in. this is my house.'
make my first mistake: think that if i open the door i will be able to prevent the cat from entering.
cat goes straight on into my flat.
i'm now pursuing the cat from room to room saying 'hey! hey you can't be in here! this is my house!'. the cat doesn't give a shit for obvious reasons (it is a cat)
i might have considered just shooing the cat outside and shutting the door but have arrived at an IMO not unreasonable concern. cat seemed very determined to enter this flat in particular and is now roaming around as if looking for something. previous owner had multiple cats and moved out AFAIK today. i have heard stories about people accidentally leaving cats behind when they move.
at this point it's 4:55 on a Friday. call my solicitor and explain the situation. ask if she could pass on a message to the seller's solicitor. unfortunately they have already closed for the week so it will have to wait till Monday but she will do her best.
decide the next course of action is to see if the cat has any ID. the cat is wearing a harness & collar so might have a tag with an address. make my second mistake: pick the cat up.
the cat does not have any ID on the harness. the cat does NOT like being picked up. cat gets very squirmy and then begins scratching me. cat manages to break my skin through a hoodie.
i put the cat down. the cat hisses at me. this is very rude considering that it is in my house.
head across the landing to see if the people opposite are missing a cat or, failing that, know their neighbours well enough to recognise the cat. there's no answer.
however!! i hear a voice down in the stairwell that sounds like it could be someone calling out a cat's name. 'hi!! is someone down there looking for a cat?' no answer.
look down the stairwell. on the ground floor there is a very large fluffy brown cat wearing a harness. !!!!! that is my cat's friend!
retrieve the cat from my flat (fortunately it just follows me out) and head downstairs. am met partway up by the cat's owner.
'oh thank god is this your cat'. it is her cat. apparently she had opened her front door to let them out into the garden and it had wandered off. 'i just moved in today it came into my flat'.
she is very apologetic. cat is unrepetent.
go back inside. call my solicitor's office. 'hi was it you i spoke to just now about the cat' (I told 2 people about the cat) 'no i just answered the phone because it was ringing. what cat.' 'can you tell *solicitor's name* that i have found the cat's owner. she will know what you mean'.
problem solved!! time to eat my peanut butter sandwich. :)
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HELLOOO happy late birthday!!
i was wondering if you could do something with a lawyer villian flirting with hero and sleeping with them to manipulate them into signing something and they do but in the villian realises that the hero actually tricked THEM instead the next morning
thank you love your writing !!
“Have you ever read Macbeth?” The villain was too groggy to answer right away. God, they hadn't expected the hero to be that...passionate and now they were just exhausted, leaving them with the desire to waste the whole day. Preferably with the hero on top of them.
“Never read books in school. I hated my English teacher,” the villain admitted, sinking their head back into the pillow, eyes still closed. They assumed the hero had gotten out bed before them which — even though it shouldn’t — wasn’t what the villain wanted.
“Shame,” the hero said. Finally, the villain turned over and stared at the hero who was sitting on the chair at the end of the bed. Their hair was wet and they didn’t have any clothes on.
Immediately, the villain cursed quietly, sitting up in bed. Being distracting was exactly what the hero managed to be constantly. Without any effort, it seemed and exactly that made the villain weak.
“Did you enjoy your shower?” the villain asked, looking the hero up and down.
“It’s a shower in a five star hotel suite. I guess it was alright.” The hero smiled and so did the villain, as if they weren’t constantly working on destroying each other. Even now, the villain didnt feel too bad. Ever since the hero had actually discovered that they were a lawyer, they had wanted to use it to their advantage. With an academic approach they were sure they could convince the hero of their “reasonable” intentions and get them to sign documents that permitted the villain to access classified information from the agency.
Mean but very entertaining. The villain had been smart about it, had written it like an apology and peace contract at once. Quite bulletproof.
“You’re feral in bed, you know? And eager, too. I like that.” The hero smiled gently and went through their hair with their hand. Although the praise didn’t seem to embarrass them, they seemed to be rather satisfied with it. The villain couldn’t help but like it.
“Peace has to be celebrated, don’t you think?” they asked. “That’s all I did. I enjoyed myself and I think you did too.”
“Oh, I definitely enjoyed myself,” the villain answered. They knew they could never have the hero in the way that they desired. So, they loved every little interaction they shared, even if it was a fight, even if it was an argument. They had to admit though, that this was the best type of interaction: whenever they got to be two people who could talk to each other and got to be themselves.
Seeing the hero this vulnerable was a nice change of pace.
“So,” the hero said and stood up. “You have never read Macbeth.”
The villain swallowed. Yesterday was already blurry in their mind, leaving nothing but the comforting feeling of being desired. But seeing the hero in front of them, naked, looking down at them, all wet...Christ.
“Uhm, no.” The hero walked over to them, pulled the blanket aside and sat down on the villain’s hips. Slowly, the adrenaline rushed back into the villain’s body and they felt the urge to flip the hero on their back and go for another round. Desire was a funny thing, they had discovered. Forcing them to do things they had never quite dared.
“You know...” The hero’s flat hand found a place to rest on the villain’s stomach, warm and familiar. “For none of woman born shall harm Macbeth.”
“That sounds good,” the villain said. Their hands found the hero’s bare hips and held them, almost afraid that the hero would get up any time soon. Water dropped onto the villain’s stomach.
“Well, his murderer wasn’t born. C-Section.”
“Oh, that’s clever.” The villain grinned as the hero’s hand started to explore.
“Language is important, isn’t it? As a lawyer you understand that better than no one else, isn’t that so?" The villain started to blush and suddenly, the feeling of having made a mistake overwhelmed them. What if the hero had found out about the line they had snuck in there? ...Allowing heroes of all kinds to be part of the association. Heroes of all kinds. Even ex-heroes which the villain most definitely was. But even then, the hero had signed the papers. There was no going back now.
“Language is very important, my little nemesis. It’s what makes you a hero. It’s what makes me a villain.”
“Not your actions, huh?”
“When you kill someone, it’s self-defense. When I kill someone, it’s murder. That’s language’s doing, not mine.”
“Hm.” The hero leaned down and kissed them gently, heavenly. “Well, darling. I guess language made your whole contract a little useless, then. You bound that contract to my hero persona, not to me as a civilian. And I am sorry to say this, but my hero persona is rather unemployed. As a civilian, I work for the agency. As a hero? Not so much.”
“What?” The villain laughed gently, not quite believing what they were hearing. “No, I have your signature.”
“You might wanna check again who’s signature you’ve got. Not my signature. You’ve got the hero’s signature.” The villain stared at them, mouth dry. They felt a little betrayed but they guessed this was karma coming back for them. God, it had been such a good plan.
“That’s ridiculous. You’re the same person.”
“Oh, sweetheart. The hero’s signature doesn’t mean anything. They’re not even a registered citizen. You were so excited that you didn’t think of that, hm?” Although the hero’s hand wandered lower and lower, the villain felt everything but excitement.
“No, I...I checked everything.”
“For none of woman born shall harm Macbeth. Babe, the hero was never born. The hero isn’t even a person.” The hero kissed them again, ever so sweetly. “But thank you for that wonderful night. You should try to trick me more often.”
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