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dogsliampaynedoesntinstagram · 1 year

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But there is I think a slightly different question - which is - does Matty Healy share that sort of economically left wing reactionary position? Is that a point of difference between Harry and Matty Healy? /

I'm the anon from this post (I hesitate to call myself TAFS podcast anon because I wouldn't say I know a lot about that podcast, and what I do know of it I find personally distasteful). I think this question is more of what I was trying to get at with my ask, though I do think your separation of worldview vs impact vs politics is a good point. Apologies in advance for a long response.

I don't actually think it's possible to tell very much about celebrities' politics in large part because we see so little of it, and it's very easy to draw incorrect conclusions from what limited data we see. The recent Matty Healy controversy is I think an interesting somewhat aberration, because he speaks about his politics and because, imo, read in the context of TAFS podcast milieu and their beliefs, and taken together with some of the things he says in the New Yorker profile, it does actually suggest a more coherent public political statement. Or at least a toying with a brand of politics, even if briefly or incoherently held, that has significant political impact.

My understanding of this brand of politics is somewhat limited (I'm mainly familiar with it from its adjacency to leftist politics and from alt-right radicalization research, so, admittedly a bit biased), but the point that I think connects to MH's statements is that they make a critique of "wokeness" as a neoliberal preoccupation with syntax and conformity disconnected from actual structures of oppression (which, I'm not altogether unsympathetic toward, but the structures of oppression they do think are real are often purely class/material with very little intersectional analysis), and they seem to find it an effective act of praxis in making that critique to be as deliberately transgressive and provocative as possible. Basically trolling the libs as praxis, with undertones of 'you getting upset about racist statements is actually undermining working class solidarity'. (And like, by the time you get to 'a good way to undermine the neoliberal order is to align with white supremacists who also hate being publicly shamed or deplatformed for being racist', you've so lost me.)

I'm also not a huge The 1975 fan (casual listener at best), so I'm relying somewhat on what I've heard from actual fans, but from what I've read TAFS podcast appearance seems to be an actual aberration and lurch towards this strain of politics that concerned some fans even pre-Taylor Swift blowup, and as you pointed out in your response, it's a very common slide from transgression to reactionary politics. The comments of Matty's that made me inclined to think there was an actual shared politics there were from the New Yorker profile, on TAFS podcast comments: "Had he baited his fans on purpose? 'A little bit,' he said. 'But it doesn’t actually matter. ... You’re either lying that you are hurt, or you’re a bit mental for being hurt. It’s just people going, ‘Oh, there’s a bad thing over there, let me get as close to it as possible so you can see how good I am.’ And I kind of want them to do that, because they’re demonstrating something so base level." That kind of thinking seems very much in line with the 'troll the libs' praxis of TAFS and Red Scare. In my opinion there's a fine, but real, line between 'backlash to these comments is overblown and often performative' and 'so therefore there's no harm in making them, and/or all backlash to these comments is illegitimate' or even 'so therefore it's GOOD to make these kind of comments to show how unserious people are when they get upset'. And I personally find that kind of politics to be actively dangerous, especially as it aligns with figures like Alex Jones and Roger Stone (and by association then white supremacist groups like the Proud Boys), so I think it's a distinction with Harry's brand of politics that's very important, especially in light of the ways that a public profile as high as Harry's or MH's can normalize certain types of politics or speech. Even unintentionally - I don't think Matty needs to necessarily hold these political beliefs deeply or even at all to have the impact of normalizing them.

In case it wasn't clear, I've mostly been talking about Matty Healy's comments on TAFS podcast, not his use of the Nazi salute. I think they've been lumped together in these conversations but I do find them categorically different. My biggest issue with both the criticism of the salute and MH's response is that I think this is just simply a complicated speech issue on which good faith positions can differ and both sides have acted like the opposite position is illegitimate and/or bad faith ('if you do a nazi salute you're always a literal nazi' vs 'in the context of a satirical critique there's no possible actual harm to using a nazi salute and criticism of it is illegitimate'). And, to dip my toes into total speculation for a brief moment, I find it entirely plausible and very much in line with the way that radicalization often occurs that the backlash MH got from the Nazi salute (and other instances mentioned in the New Yorker profile, like his BLM tweets) might have pushed him closer to that economically left wing reactionary position.

Thanks for coming back - I think this is a really interesting conversation and agree with a lot of what you say. But I think it's less likely than you do that Matty Healy is in that economically left wing reactionary position - and I'm going to try and explore why.

I think part of it is that you seem to see a lot of connection between the method (provocation and transgression) and the politics (left wing economically and socially reactionary). I see the connection as being much more conditional - and think that both can and often do exist separate from each other. For example, locally in NZ, the people who most occupy an economically left-wing politically reactionary position - don't use transgression and provocation. They would also be reasonably vigilant on avoiding racist language, for example.

Now my analysis is definitely hampered by lack of context. I don't know a lot about this type of politics. I listened to Matty Healy's episode of TAFS - just for some context. I didn't pick up anything political about it - and I'm not sure that I think that I believe that they have the politics they claim to have. So this is more a discussion of the position as you describe it and how that relates to Matty Healy.

One reason I think it's worth separating the method from the politics - is that I don't think Matty Healy is economically left-wing enough for any trip to a more reactionary politics to follow the path you outline. I think if you look at what we know about his worldview (and I emphasise that this isn't an argument that people have to take his worldview seriously or about either his actions or their impacts - just the relative importance of different issues to him) - he is much closer to being 'the libs' than anything else (there's a reason that I compare his politics to Harry Styles). He's talked much more about queer rights, women's liberation and even anti-racism than he has the redistribution of wealth. I don't think that working class solidarity is particularly important to his worldview. (And just to be clear - I think politics that build the better world must embrace both liberation struggles and working-class solidarity and there's no contradiction between the two. But if I was going to characterise Matty Healy's politics I'd say that a watered down version of liberation struggles loomed larger than a watered down version of working-class solidarity).

To turn to provocation and transgression - I agree with everything you say about their dangers as a political strategy - and that there is no shortage of examples of that (I also think it's worth noting that provocation and transgression has a long history - and while supporting fascism is a thread, it's not the only thread). But the other thing to say is that provocation and transgression have a long non-political tradition as well.

I have to preface my next thought yet again - by saying that this is not an assessment of the impact of Matty Healy's actions, or in any way a comment of what anyone should think or feel about Matty Healy's action. This is just me trying to figure out what's going on for him - and not an argument that what's going on for him has to matter for anyone else. But I don't think this was what it would look like if he was trying to make politically provocative comments. We don't actually have a clear, intentional, politically provocative comment from him.

I think you're right to single out the podcast. But the provocative action was going on the podcast in the first place, not what he actually said - where he went along with and egged on what the hosts were doing, rather than being the person making the provocation. (again to be clear - I don't think it has to matter to people's response - judging people for going along with and egging on is perfectly valid. I do think it matters when thinking about how Matty Healy engages in political provocation). Apart from that we get things like what he says before the band cuts him off - which I think are about the idea of political provocation - rather than involving him actually saying anything provocative. And then you have him doing things that actually make people angry in ways that he doesn't expect, rather than being provocative.

I do think Matty Healy is interested in provocation and transgression, and I think that is the biggest danger for his politics getting a lot worse. But I don't think provocation and transgression defines his politics at the moment.

I do think you're completely right about the risk of the process of radicalisation - and agree that there's a real risk with Matty Healy. I think I assess the risk as a little lower than you do. Partly for the reasons I've mentioned above, but also because I think he's interested in and aware of that process. But I do think there's a risk - and we won't know how high that risk is until we see how he responds to this last month. But I think it's worth saying that it's always a choice - we'll see how he chooses to respond.

#I still haven't intentionally listened to song from The 1975 #I'm pretty sure I must have heard some #when I was in the UK #because I used to listen to Radio 1 in the car #But I am pretty curious about these dynamics #and interested in what is coming next

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ayankun · 2 years

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AoS S4 (Agents of Hydra pod specifically) is hitting so right this time around 🥰

Not that it isn't normally something I love a lot, but I'm in a good spot right now to be over-analyzing folks' psychologies and interior motivations, and watching all these excellent performers perform excellent character writing is just blowing my mind.

And, like, I understand that the LMD/Framework storyline felt to some like a "a dream all along" kind of cop-out, but personally I can't get over the level of attention and care the writers put into asking the question, "at a certain level of complexity, is there a difference between a simulation and the real thing?" And all these characters go into this storyline with different starting points and interact with this question differently, and we get a nice big conversation on the topic with no spoon-fed answers.

Mace's story is amazing, and Framework Ward and Trip are actually so good.

Especially Framework!Ward being ACTUAL, ALGORITHMICALLY-CORRECT Ward, just with different inputs producing a different output, existing as a foil to the Doctor to show that all these Framework personalities belong to the real underlying person -- they're not AI-generated fictions, I mean -- and amount to alternate timeline versions of themselves.

So on the topic of the Doctor, what a fun (fun is NOT the right word) example of toxic masculinity as a concept that doesn't exist in a vacuum but rather is an external oppressive force exerted onto its victims by those already in power. Fitz is a deeply deeply emotional guy, by nature, and in this timeline his nurturing environment forbade displays of, AND I QUOTE, "womanly sentiments," i.e., processing his emotions in a healthy way, and he becomes cruel and vicious as a direct consequence.

Even the real, generally well-adjusted Fitz is shown to strike out in anger, he throws stuff off desks and punches rocks when he's angry, right? In the Framework, the Doctor doesn't have ANY alternate methods for channeling this huge uncomfortable emotion. It's either Bottle It Up (exhibit A: when he sees his dad's body) or Hurt Whoever Hurt You x1000 (see: all the state-sanctioned torture, personally hunting Simmons down, etc.)

(And, it's like, I think Dad!Fitz is characterized as being that stiff-upper-lip person by nature. His worldview is informed by what makes instinctive sense to HIM, and maybe he wouldn't be as much of a negative impact in the world around him if he also had the capacity to see that other people ... are different!!! His son is different. The narrative here is explicitly that the Doctor is what Leopold Fitz would have become if the universe allowed his father undue influence over Fitz's own worldview -- if his father used his parental authority to hold Fitz accountable for adopting and perpetuating his toxic, one-size-fits-all worldview.)

Which, I think -- I think -- is the problem. Thee capital P problem. People in authority trying to put people in black-and-white boxes, no matter what, even when that isn't going to work.

Daisy and Aida talked around this point, Aida the bad parent saying "I'm just giving them what they want" and Daisy the childhood trauma victim saying "sometimes what people want isn't right for them." (I know that Daisy saying this is also meant to be her reflecting on her post-S3 journey of self-distruction, and her getting to this point is a major milestone in her recovery but)

This conversation leads to the reveal of Aida's true goal -- self-determination. Her own "childhood" trauma has led her to this point. She was L I T E R A L L Y programmed to behave according to Radcliffe's personal worldview (side note: chief among his desires is to prolong and enhance life; you think Aida's NOT going to react badly when her own "life" is threatened???? She literally doesn't have another option than to preserve herself at all costs. She's mirror-verse Agnes, facing her own mortality not with Agnes' grace but with Radcliffe's ethically-unhinged stubbornness.)

Aida had a pad parent, who was blind to her needs (and/or deliberately chose not to meet them), and this is the result. #notallandroids

I got lost, but I think what I'm trying to say is something something cycles of generational trauma?

#AoS #S4 #the framework #Aida #the doctor #agents of hydra

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memento-mariii · 5 years

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That last post I reblogged reminds me of the first time I ever experienced misogyny. Or as I like to call it, ~Baby's First Taste of Misogyny~

You see, until then, I was really lucky. I was never catcalled or sexually harassed, and my parents never made me feel that the most important thing about me was my looks. In fact, since I was one of those kids with ADD whose neurodivergence manifested as something that could be miscontrued as brilliance, I think they were convinced that I was going to up to find the Cure for Cancer(TM), or become a SuperLawyer(TM), or something. (Sorry for being a disappointment, Mom & Dad! Love ya!)

I was so successfully shielded from sexism until then, to the point that I used to be one of those girls who think that feminism is a little silly. After all, haven't we already achieved equality? Isn't sexism a thing in the past? (Spoiler alert: no we haven't and no it isn't. Sadly.)

Fast forward to first year of high school. Or maybe it was third year of middle school? As a teen, I have been to a lot of science programs, to the point I can't exactly remember which was which, so I can't pinpoint the exact time. But I do remember hating Twilight back then-I vividly remember reading a twihate blog on livejournal on the bus to the SNU-so it must be when Twilight was still popular, or at least when it was still relevant.

So, late middle school or early high school: since I was something of a teacher's pet, and a straight-up-A student to boot(this is not a humblebrag; me being excellent at high school has zero bearing on the clusterfuck that is my life now; I guess I peaked at high school), my science teacher offered me a chance to go to Seoul National University's science outreach program. I use the term "outreach program" loosely- the program taught us nothing about science, it was more of a "come and get to know our school, so more of you'll enroll and we'd have more tuition to build more unnecessary buildings with" kind of deal. (I'm sure there's a word for that in English, but I'm not a native speaker and nothing comes to mind, so I'll keep on referring it as an outreach program)

Nevertheless, I was STOKED. In case you don't know, Seoul National University is one of the best, if not the best school in South Korea. It also happened to be my dream college.

So, on that fateful day, I, accompanied by handful of other students from our school's science club, show up to SNU and are joined by similar students from other schools. They lead us to a boring white room with a beam projector in it. Then a guy, in his late-thirties or so, comes in and talks about the school, what kind of stuff they teach, how natural sciences are awesome and you shouldn't ever think about going to engineering school(if it wasn't obvious, the outreach program was directed by SNU's natural sciences department and not the whole school, har har), et cetra. I'll call this guy the Speaker, because to this day I have no idea if that dude was supposed to be a professor, a tutor, a faculty member, or some rando that happened to work in the department.

Soon, the Speaker guy is done with his speaking, and he asks if anyone has any questions. Two or so dudes raise their hands, and he picks one and answers his question. Then he says that this time, he'll take a question from one of the girls. None of us raise our hands-I don't know why, maybe they were busy taking notes? I, for one, had tons of questions I was dying to ask, but was to shy to actually raise my hands, so maybe they too were shy?-whatever it was, it wasn't because of plain disinterest, because remember: those girls wanted to come. They were handpicked by their teachers as students most likely to be interested in the outreach program. All of them were members of their school's science clubs. And remember!!! the guys weren't that different either!!! only two of the guys had raised their hands, so that's only two people less!!!

So imagine my surprise, when out of the blue, OUT OF FUCKING NOWHERE, this idiot opens his gapehole and says---

"솔직히 여학생들은 이런것보다 솥뚜껑 운전이 더 편하죠, 안그래요?"

What he said is a misogynistic Korean slang, so it's hard for me to translate exactly, but the gist of it goes like this.

"Honestly girls would be better off staying in the kitchen and making and sandwiches than doing something like this(as in, studying STEM) am I right?"

I am shocked. I am flabbergasted. Remember, this guy's job is to leave a good impression of the school to the students so that they'd want to return there when they graduate. But this idiot, this absolute buffoon, comes up and invokes the Korean equivalent of the tired phrase, "make me a sandwich"! This is such a monumentally stupid move on his part, to this day I have no idea what he was thinking. Again, his job was to leave a good impression of the school! What was he trying to achieve with such a jab? Doesn't the school have any sort of sensitivity program? I'd assume he could get in huge trouble if any of the students reported his behaviour to the administration! He had nothing to gain, and everything to lose from saying such a thing! What was he thinking? It makes no logistical sense. If it wasn't my first-hand experience, and I heard this from somebody else, I'd think they were bullshitting me. Sometimes even I wonder if it was just a fever dream. It's that stupid! It makes! no! sense!

The students aren't exactly enraged, but we're not laughing along either. If anything, we're confusedly sharing awkward glances with each other. And because men like this are astronomically bad at getting a clue, the idiot prattles on:

"I feel bad for you girls. You don't actually want to be here, but your parents are forcing you to do it because they are too conceited."

Conceited for what? Supporting and encouraging their daughter's passion for science? For thinking that their daughters were good enough to be equal to their male colleagues in STEM? For thinking that their daughters could ever achieve anything more than "staying in the kitchen and making sandwiches"? Who is the one that's being conceited here? And motherfucker, how dare you insult my parents like that?

The atmosphere is getting tangibly awkard now. The discomfort is real. And the speaker, fool that he is, finally catches on. He abruptly and clumsily changes the subject, and luckily for everyone, it's time for restroom breaks not long after that.

I didn't need to go to the bathroom, not really, but I go anyway to lock myself in the stalls and gather my thoughts for a bit. After the bathroom break is over, it's time for another speaker to speak, so that awful speaker has already left the room(thank God!). The rest of the day goes by in a blur, and I don't have much memory of it.

A disclaimer: after that incident, I was invited to a lot of different science outreach programs, some of it manned by the Seoul National University, and all of them were really educational and all around delightful. I have nothing but fond memories of them. In fact, I can only think of one instant when a university-led science program wasn't fun, and that's the incident I have detailed above. So I won't call SNU itself misogynistic, just that the first of their outreach program I went to was....weird. They didn't even teach science(all of the other outreach programs I went to taught ar least some science), it didn't look like it was sanctioned by the whole school, only the natural sciences department, and there were like kids from only a handful of schools(all the other outreach programs I went to had kids from at least tens of schools). So.... I don't really know what happened, behind the scenes.

Despite all that, SNU continued to be my dream university.

Even though I now had a newfound anxiety about never being seen as an equal by my male peers, I continued to love science and ended up majoring in Chemical Engineering. (I didn't end up going to the SNU though, but not for lack of trying. The school I go to is pretty rad too, but not as rad as SNU.)

I wish I could tell you what happened to the sexist speaker, but I honestly have no idea. But I hope he got fired. I can say only one kind thing about that guy, and it's that he made me realize that sexism and misogyny are alive and well in this day and age, which led to me becoming a feminist.

So, thank you for that, Mr. Speaker from my memories. Let's not meet again.

#long post #mmari rambles #rant #women in stem #misogyny #feminism #tw sexism #tw swearing #honestly I said SNU but it's been so long ago I'm not sure if it was that or KAIST #either way it had a huge impact on my worldview #a rude (but much needed) wake-up call

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sluttyopinions · 4 years

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The Blunt Reality of Attack on Titan

August 4, 2020

Written by Samantha, Slutty Opinions

OPENING

People usually tend to associate anime and manga with being crazy over the top action packed experiences. Attack on Titan is a series full of exactly that. It’s a hugely popular franchise known for having insanely cool action and bombastic music. People flying around doing impossible feats and fighting fantastical enemies that are larger than life are common. Despite all this flash and excitement, the series never lets you forget the harsh reality of the world itself in a unique way, effectively separating it from many of its peers.

This grim reality is basically used to beat the audience over the head over and over, at times too liberally and too often as some would argue. I personally think how the original author of the manga that started it all, Hajime Isayama, entwines every aspect of his story with cynicism and grimness is one of the major reasons why I love the series, and I’m willing to bet it’s a big reason for a lot of fans whether they know it or not. Before I get into the details, I will say that I won’t be putting in any real spoilers of either the manga or the anime so if you’re just curious about what I may have to say, you can keep going. I’d also like to mention that I am more of a recent fan, but still a big one. I’ve seen the entire anime and have been trying to catch up on the source material, so my knowledge and opinions will be limited to that amount of content.

THE TITANS

For anyone unaware of the basic premise of Attack on Titan, the last remnant of the human race has been trapped by huge humanoid beasts in an expansive settlement surrounded by walls. It is humanity’s job to fight off these mindless monsters and survive behind the walls. The titans are a large part of what creates the identity of the series. Seems kind of obvious since it’s literally the title and all. The way these titans are integrated into the action and the story of the show is a large part of what prevents Attack on Titan from simply being another generic action series that ends up forgotten as a flavor of the month. It seems like I’m not giving the series enough credit because there is a LOT it does right otherwise such as pacing, story structure, characters, and so on that combine to make an incredible experience that has captivated many. However, I still stand by the idea that the titans help make the franchise feel truly one of a kind.

Everyone who’s ever seen the titans has probably noticed how grotesquely and uncannily they are designed. In the manga, the whole world and the way many things and people are drawn especially all have very creepy vibes to it all. While it would be a huge stretch to claim Attack on Titan is a horror manga, it’s common sense to acknowledge it’s strongly influenced by horror. The absolute sense of uncertainty and powerlessness these monsters present nearly every time they’re on screen is overpowering to both the characters that must deal with them and the audience as well.

Isayama creates a feeling of dread involving these beasts insanely effectively. Any encounter with them even if it is merely 1 or 2 of them can always lead to sudden death. There is never safety in the presence of the titans even for the most skilled. Their pure size and physical ability is nearly never downplayed. While the humans have their own special weapons and crazy abilities, the titans are hardly ever presented as mere battle fodder or mulch. Titans happen to be very good at killing people and the delivery of it all makes it feel believable. Keeping the antagonists intimidating and serious is very important for the overall feeling of Attack on Titan.

At times it can even feel like too much. The idea of any character dropping dead at any time can be very discouraging when you’re trying to get invested in a cast or just getting started. Sure that amount of pure “edge” in itself is appealing to a lot of people, but edge without purpose or substance makes for very bad entertainment in my eyes. It’s honestly in fact one of my pet peeves. I did not expect to like Attack on Titan for a long time due to this reputation it had for being brutal and random. Just not my style. When I actually gave it a shot however, I realized the writing is a lot more purposeful and I’d even say forgiving than I expected. While at times being an emotionally exhausting experience and definitely pessimistic in many ways, this series treats the terrible events that occur left and right with proper gravity and maturity.

THE NATURE OF WAR

Attack on Titan has a lot to say about a variety of subjects. It’s honestly much more subtle and intelligent than I even thought with my initial blind viewing of the anime. Reading the manga through the same events really gave me an appreciation for the thought and detail that goes into Isayama’s writing. The most obvious subject he focuses on is something that is probably less than subtle however and can be spotted quickly by anyone who has seen or read even a bit of the series.

That subject happens to be the horrors of war. On the surface the story seems to be just a simple story of man vs beast and it wouldn’t make much sense for it to have anything to say about war. While the circumstances involved are very fantasy-themed and at times ridiculous, it still at its heart is a narrative about war and how humans cope with it, both those on the front lines and those who watch from afar.

The grim and serious nature of the series is the way it is directly thanks to that theme. If life wasn’t always at risk, if it wasn’t treated as fragile, if death wasn’t respected and dwelled on and treated with the utmost permanence and seriousness, this theme would not work the way it does. Anything less runs the risk of just looking like glorification while merely saying the opposite. Admittedly there’s a lot of people who still somehow think Attack on Titan glorifies war but that’s a whole other subject. A very impactful and relevant part of the story is one early on where humanity wins a huge battle, yet no one bothers to celebrate merely because the overwhelming weight of the dead hangs heavier than any related relief ever could. This kind of grim and depressing, yet honest storytelling about war is very common throughout the plot.

What it means to be a soldier, the intricate overlap of society, media, government, and economics on war, the will and the reason to fight, the sanctity of human life and the nature of sacrifice and finding meaning in meaningless and constant death are all discussed often and in detail in Attack on Titan and the grim realness of everything that happens in the story and the overall feeling of being unsafe it conveys are deeply important to allowing these themes and discussions to work as well as they do.

PHILOSOPHY AND PSYCHOLOGY

The last major aspect of the story that I think benefits greatly from the unrestrained reality and brutality of the series is the very unique philosophy and psychology that Isayama presents. Most of the points and lessons the characters learn through the story are not pleasant ones. Everything the characters go through and the utter bleakness of Attack on Titan’s world shapes everyone’s worldviews. People take small steps and make concessions to have hope in this world. Optimism is present plenty, but the way the characters experience optimism is still rife with sacrifice and harsh undeniable truths.

This very unique perspective compared to a lot of similar media is refreshing in its own way and kept me questioning what I knew. You couldn’t often easily predict the conclusions characters would come to because they are not what you may have come to expect from other media. One major character, Erwin Smith, is a great example of the kind of ideas Attack on Titan will throw around. His character is labeled as a demon by some, but a hero by the same people as well. The necessity of pain and sacrifice underlies all progress and achievement and he knows it and so do many others, even if it’s hard to accept. Having to create guidelines bound by the rules and expectations of reality only makes them that much more applicable to real life and real war.

Despite all this, the series never feels outright preachy. Characters dwelling on the meaning of what’s happening to them is specific to which character and which circumstances. It doesn’t feel nearly like the author is writing an essay about the way things are or should be while using characters as mouthpieces and more just people in a hard situation trying to make meaning out of the meaningless suffering around them. Agreeing or disagreeing with any point as a reader or viewer isn’t portrayed as wrong in any case it’s more a vehicle for thought as well as phenomenal character building. Like real war, none of the questions presented have a genuine correct answer. The character Levi himself at some point in the story even admits that as a veteran in battle, he can never be truly sure of his choices.

CLOSING THOUGHTS

The amount of respect and purpose Attack on Titan treats its frequent suffering with is key to the experience as a whole. While a series with just good writing all around and good reasons for its fame, something that in my opinion makes it feel like something special and something that captivated me is the overall gravity of the story. Without being effective at intensity and discomfort as well as in dealing with said discomfort, the story just wouldn’t feel real. And if it doesn’t feel real, it won’t feel like it matters. This series matters quite a lot to myself and many others and I hope this is at least a glimpse as to why.

#attack on titan #psychology #article #manga #anime #hajime isayama #analysis #reality #no spoilers

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raisingsupergirl · 4 years

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They Could NEVER Do That These Days…

So, I watched the movie Airplane the other day for the first time in at least a decade. And, well, it was an experience. First off, I laughed more than I have in a long time. The attention to detail, the quick wit, and the non-stop banter left me nearly breathless. But because of the sheer volume of jokes—which included plenty of physical comedy, prop comedy, puns, play on words, and jabs at contemporary issues (of that time)—I found myself frequently thinking, "They could never do that these days." In fact, I probably laughed the hardest at the scenes where the little old White lady acted as a "jive" translator for two Black men, but I knew something like that would never fly in our current culture. Which, of course, left me wondering if I'm an awful person. And I've been thinking about contemporary morality ever since then, most of which has included the "cancel culture."

You've probably heard about the death of Mr. Potato Head and Dr. Seuss recently, right? Gender norms and racial sensitivity are hot button topics right now, and the "cancel culture" seems to be wielding them like flaming swords. At least… that's what I've heard, anyway. It's entwined in conversations with my patients and plastered all over my Facebook feed. And to be honest, it's my gut reaction, too. But do you know what's great about being a grown adult living in a first-world country? I have the freedom, time, and resources to unpack those gut reactions—to dig deeper into the facts until I can form a sober-minded opinion that reflects a little more truth. And it took me all of ten minutes to stop being afraid of the leftist childhood killers.

No, I'm not a liberal. Soooo far from it, in fact. But that doesn't mean I'm sitting on the right side of the isle, either. In fact, if there IS a left and right side of the isle in whatever political building we're talking about, I'd probably be outside said building, chasing butterflies and rolling in the grass, blissfully unaware of the crazies locked inside on such a beautiful day. But anyway, now that you know just how UN-political I am, let's talk about politics. First off, Fox news is bonkers. Their stories and debates are laughably biased. I can't listen for more than a few seconds before rolling my eyes. Then again, so is EVERY other news channel! Why? Ratings! A network that vowed to only report facts without opinions would go bankrupt in a week. And what is politics without taking sides in a debate, anyway? The way I see it, it's all just Jerry Springer with a facelift.

But if that's really my stance toward politics, what business do I have talking about any of this at all? Why do I even care? Well, I care because I have kids. And those kids have to grow up in this world. Their thoughts and opinions will be impacted by this world. And because I think the way I grew up is the best way, my knee-jerk reaction is to be afraid of change that could rob my little girls of the pearls of happiness that shaped MY childhood. So who has more authority to determine the future of Mr. Potato Head—hypersensitive justice warriors or apolitical parents? My answer? Honestly? I don't really care. And let me tell you why.

It's a freaking toy! Hasbro, the owners of the Potato Head brand (one person tweeted that they should drop the "bro" and just be "Has," which I think is downright hilarious), decided that it would be a good idea to rebrand their marketing to be more inclusive to non-traditional family units. But do you know what they DIDN'T do? They didn't kill Mr. Potato Head or his lovely wife. They're still flying off the shelves. It's only the marketing that has changed. The argument could be made that outrage from outlets like Fox helped retain some of this traditional packaging, but… still… It's a hunk of plastic being sold at huge margins for mild entertainment. I wouldn't be sad if they burned the whole product line to the ground. It's lame anyway.

And what about Dr. Seuss? Decidedly NOT lame, and I don't trust anyone who thinks he is. So how in the would could "they" pull his books from all of our schools!? Lolol. Okay, thirty seconds of Googling clears up the situation. Dr. Seuss Enterprises has decided to stop printing six (6… SIX) of their books because of insensitive material. But they're still printing almost SIXTY other Seuss books. They've decided that ten percent of their material, which stretches back to before World War 2, is no longer culturally relevant. Honestly, that's amazing. Especially considering one of the earliest works was titled, "The Pocket Book of Boners.”

Book production is halted all the time. Usually it's because people lose interest. Sometimes it's because the book includes material that promotes racism in a positive way… to our kids. But it's always because the publishers want to continue making money. That's capitalism. If you don't like it, you're a communist (j/k… kind of). And besides, if you can tell me which six Seuss books are being "canceled," I'll eat my words. Every single one of them.

I guess what it all comes down to is that I've got bigger problems. I had to spank my daughter this morning because she was screaming (like, I'm surprised the neighbors didn't call 9-1-1) about the injustice of not being able to bring the "right" toys to her soccer game. The soccer game in which she would be playing soccer. Not playing with toys. Priorities. Materialism. Limited worldview. She won't miss six random Dr. Seuss books. She won't notice the rebranded Potato Heads. She will know that it's not appropriate to cry and wail and kick and flail (eat your heart out, Dr. Seuss) about toys when her teammates will be depending on her. She will know that Daddy is firm but loving, that he would do anything to keep her safe, that he only disciplines to prepare her for the best possible future. She'll know that, above all else, our purpose in life is to love God and to love others. She will know to choose people over things and to never give into misplaced fear.

Because, in the end, fear is at the root of this whole topic. We're afraid of losing control, losing our childhood, losing our freedom. But all of that melts away when we lean into something that can never be lost—our freedom to love and be loved. It's a simple fact that some will never lean into, and that makes me more sad than anything. More sad than the loss of a few toys or children's books. Even more sad than if the big, bad "cancel culture" came after some of the things that I love. Sure, the world wouldn't be the same without Airplane, but I probably wouldn't miss it. Lord knows I've got more than enough slapstick chaos in my daily life already.

#cancel culture #mr. potato head #potato head #dr. seuss books #book banning #social equality #gender norms #momblr #dadblr #mumblr #capitalism #politics

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leviathangourmet · 4 years

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(Archive Link)

I recently attended a Washington-D.C. event focused on community-building hosted by The Aspen Institute’s Weave project, which works to reduce social isolation and build bonds between Americans. During one portion of the event, various activists described how racism had impacted their lives and their communities. Following a number of such testimonials, a white woman from southeast Ohio named Sarah Adkins spoke about her own community work, which involves raising money to provide post-trauma support to individuals affected by tragedies.

Perhaps because several speakers had discussed racism and issues related to white privilege, Adkins spoke about her own self-perceived racial privilege. “I followed the perfect mold…I did all the things, I went to college, and I keep thinking of white privilege in my head so forgive me, that’s what’s in my head right now, very much white privilege,” she said, while reflecting on her middle class life in an affluent neighborhood.

But Adkins also went on to describe the reason she originally had become involved in community work—which is that her then-husband had killed both of her sons and then later took his own life. One can only imagine how much suffering this caused her. Yet she still viewed herself as privileged due to her race.

“I was wealthy, okay, I was a pharmacist, I made a lot of money, right? So after that happened, I really wanted to understand that for me there definitely was a lot of white privilege. I had money, I had health insurance, so people came in and cleaned up my house. I was able to pay for a funeral for my children,” she said.

I wondered how someone who’d lived through such an awful tragedy could consider themselves to be in any way “privileged.” Yes, she had the funding to clean up her home and bury her relatives. But nearly everybody has at least some advantages in life. It feels perverse for someone who has suffered so much to be confessing their perceived advantages.

When activists and academics invoke the phrase “white privilege,” they typically are speaking of advantages that whites, on average, have over members of other ethnic minority groups in our society. And there is no doubt that racial inequality is both real and persistent in the United States, where I live, and elsewhere. There is a sizable racial wealth gap, a life expectancy gap, and an incarceration gap. Many of America’s most pressing social problems disproportionately harm people from minority groups.

But there is a danger that, by talking about this inequality as an all-consuming phenomenon, we will end up creating a flattened and unfair image that portrays all whites in all situations and all contexts as benefiting from unearned advantages. Indeed, it’s possible that we will cause people to confuse a structural inequality that exists on the level of group average with the circumstances of every individual within a particular racial group.

In the case of Adkins’s tragic story, it’s not even clear that being white in any way constituted a form of privilege. Recent research has found a huge surge in white working-class suicides. In 2017, whites in the United States had a suicide rate of 17.8 per 100,000; for Hispanics, that rate was 6.9; for African-Americans, it was 6.9. The only group with a higher suicide rate than whites was Native Americans, at 22.2.

The phenomenon of suicide is not perfectly understood, but it is generally believed that loneliness and alienation are driving factors. Whites in America tend (on average) to be more culturally individualistic, while those from other groups tend (again, on average) to exhibit more collectivist social values. The group of which I am part, Asian-Americans, would be “privileged” on this index, since our rate (6.6) is well below that of whites. But would it really be wise for me to tackle the social problem of suicide by zooming in on some idea of “Asian privilege?”

In fact, research recently published in the Journal of Experimental Psychology suggests that such an approach wouldn’t just be unhelpful. It would actually be harmful.

I recently interviewed Erin Cooley, a psychology professor and lead researcher at Colgate University, about her research for Greater Good magazine. She studies prejudice and structural inequality and her research has illuminated the ways in which persistent racism continues to negatively impact the lives of racial minorities in America. A study she recently published, for instance, shows how participants were more likely to associate poverty with blacks as opposed to whites. Her team found that this association helps predict opposition toward policies that involve economic redistribution, since it is widely believed that these policies benefit blacks over whites.

Her team was curious about the impact of teaching people about white privilege. Would it make people more sympathetic toward poor blacks? As part of their research, Cooley and her colleagues offered study participants a reading on white privilege—based partly on the seminal work of Peggy McIntosh, who originally formulated the concept in the 1980s—and then described to them the plight of a hypothetical man, identified as either white or black, who is down on his luck.

What the researchers found is that among social liberals—i.e., participants who had indicated that they hold liberal beliefs about social issues—reading a text about white privilege did nothing to significantly increase their sympathy toward the plight of poor blacks. But, as Cooley told me, “it did significantly bump down their sympathy for a [hypothetical] poor white person.” (Among conservative participants, there was observed no significant change in attitudes at all.)

What accounts for this? One possibility is that social liberals are internalizing white-privilege lessons in a way that flattens the image of whites, portraying all of them as inherently privileged. So if a white person is poor, it must be his or her own fault. After all, they’ve had all sorts of advantages in life that others haven’t.

When we talk about racial inequality, it is important to understand that we’re often talking about structural or society-wide averages, not the status of all individuals at all times. It is true, for instance, that African Americans are disproportionately impacted by poverty. That means a higher percentage of African Americans live in poverty as compared to whites. But the largest number of individuals in the United States who live in poverty are white. We can’t, and we shouldn’t, assume anything about any individual’s life solely based on his or her race, or based on larger facts about racial inequality.

Racism exists, of course, and its impact is disproportionately felt by society’s minority populations. I have personally spent a decent chunk of my reporting career documenting this. But the fact that disparate treatment is inflicted on racial minorities doesn’t prove the existence of an all-encompassing pattern of white privilege. “If you’re white, chances are seeing a police officer fills you with one of two things: relief or gratitude,” writes one advocate of a privilege-centric worldview. But around half of the people who are killed every year by U.S. police officers are white. True, police violence falls disproportionately on ethnic minorities, especially African Americans. But if you’re white and you’ve been abused by a police officer, your individual experience may be just as painful as that of a black person who’s suffered similar abuse.

If we extend the logic of privilege beyond the issue of race, it’s easy to see the flaws with this approach. We know, for instance, that 93 percent of people in U.S. federal prisons are men. In nearly every part of the criminal justice system, in fact, men on average have it worse than women do. But does that then mean we should be discussing “female privilege”? Would it be beneficial to the men behind bars for women to proclaim awareness of their “privileged” status?

A typical conservative response to privilege discourse is to downplay the very real inequalities that exist. This isn’t helpful. We can’t escape talking about inequality in a diverse society. For instance, we shouldn’t shy away from looking at high maternal mortality rates among black women and how it may be linked to inadequate cultural competence among medical staff. However, what I would suggest is that we change the way we talk about this inequality. Asking whites to publicly confess their white privilege—in a manner that often resembles a religious ritual more than anything else—may lead us to unfairly flatten the experience of whites while, ironically, actually shifting attention away from those who are underprivileged. The Cooley study shows that this isn’t just a hypothetical concern; it’s a reality that has been demonstrated through research.

One alternative to white-privilege discourse would be to focus on the causes and consequences of deprivation rather than on naming groups of people we believe to hold special advantages—and to stop referring to things that we should expect for all people as “privileges.” It is not a privilege to have a decent and safe childbirth, or avoid harassment by the police, or to have enough to eat. All of those things should be something we expect. While we can and should aggressively address inequality, we should make sure the methods we employ serve to strengthen our sense of empathy rather than sap it.

#social science #social justice #racism #critical race theory #equity #affirmative action #equality #anti-racism #article #faq

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motherofqups · 4 years

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I’ve emerged from my depression hole with... thoughts:

Art is hard. Making is hard, creating content is hard. You put a piece of yourself in everything you make, whether you realize it or not. It can make criticism hard to take, especially if your reason for making is to help people, to make the world a brighter, better place, or just to keep yourself afloat, financially, mental health wise, whatever.

Art begets criticism. If you’re putting anything out into the world, you’re asking someone to consume it, on some level. Critical thinking is part of consumption, and with that could come criticism. THIS IS GOOD. This is good for you, as an artist. It’s good for your craft, for your resiliency, for your empathy. Iron sharpens iron. Knowing how your audience interprets your art helps you make better art. Not all feedback is good, sure, and sometimes it’s sucky and stupid and completely misses the point. You don’t have to absorb or implement every piece of feedback that comes your way. But...

If you want to be an ally, you need to hear how marginalized and oppressed groups interpret your art. You want to decrease the suck in the world and not increase it, right? Then someone telling you your interpretation is insensitive, a bad take, or downright offensive, wouldn’t you want to know so you can learn and be better? If you know you have privilege, know that your art could reflect that, too. Seek out differing voices. Get a sensitivity reader. Get out of your echo chamber. Diversify who you follow. And stop doubling down on your shitty takes. No one would blink an eye if you took the feedback and made changes with a simple but heartfelt apology.

Tone matters, but it also doesn’t. Let me be clear - I condemn bullying in all forms, including using large fan bases to harass smaller creators. (I can’t believe I even have to write that sentence.) And yes, not all feedback is worded perfectly. It may sting. You may wish it was kinder. But keep in mind that marginalized groups are tired. We’re tired. We’re tired of pointing out the same shit over and over and over again. We might fly off the handle, we might not always pull our punches. Is that always okay? I don’t know; I only know that the older I get, the harder it is to stay calm when I’m triggered. I only know that using tone policing as your excuse for not hearing the feedback hurts everyone involved: it hurts you, the artist, and it hurts the people you continue to marginalize with your work.

Understand your influence. I am a tiny, tiny creator in this fandom. I have less than 100 followers, I only link out to my AO3, and my stats are probably laughable to some. And still... I take my platform very seriously. I know that the media we consume shapes our worldview, can have a huge impact on our mental health, on how we see ourselves and how connected we feel to the universe. If you are a large creator, please please please consider the way you use your platform. Even if we unfollow you, we cannot escape you, either your work itself or the way you influence the work of others. If I unfollowed everyone who reblogged problematic shit, I would have no fandom left. You have influence, you have reach. Take care with how you use it.

You do not have to be perfect for your criticism to be valid. Full disclosure: I was in that server. To me, it was a supportive place, where everyone hyped up everyone else and shared content, no matter the clout, the follower number, the skill level. We listened to each other when were struggling. We had conversations where we disagreed, respectfully so. We discussed the going’s-on in the fandom. I realize now that wasn’t everyone’s experience, and it makes me heartsick there were folx that felt uncomfortable in a place we tried to make safe and welcoming. Were we perfect? No, we’re human. We made mistakes, and will continue to do so - that is the human condition. The criticism is rightly served, served and heard, and we’re stepping back to examine the parts we played in all this. That does not negate the cricitism that came from that space. That criticism is still valid and should be treated as such.

Please be kind... to others, and to yourself. We’re all here because we love the same thing. We are all hurting in this new world we’re forging. Please choose kindness and empathy and grace. Please choose to learn and grow and evolve so this fandom can still be the little pocket of escape we want it to be. I believe in us. And... don’t lose heart. You are not a bad person for making a mistake. You are not a bad person for having a blind spot. If you are listening to others and considering the larger impact of your actions... you’re doing the best you can. We’re all just doing the best we can.

That’s all I have for now. Sending out my little love and little light to you all.

🖤, moc

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thedarklordsnicklefritz · 5 years

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Okay, I'm going to attempt to distill some of my thoughts regarding the Astrid conversation:

I find Calebs background and relationship with the Empire and the Vollstrekers relatable. There are shades of it that remind me of my own personal break with religion. I didn't kill my whole family or torture people or anything, but there's definitely a sense of "wow, I have a lot of toxic things internalized from growing up in this culture that I no longer agree with and now have to unlearn." I was a True Believer for most of my life, much like I think Bren was a True Believer in the Empire, and it had a huge impact on who I am as a person and my identity. I'm still recovering from it in a lot of ways and trying to figure things out.

I have a lot of friends who have left the church and now rail against it, and I have a lot of friends and family who stay, and I understand both sides, but feel kind of stuck in the middle. There things I feel strongly about that I can't compromise on, so I can't really be a part of the church anymore, but I also think there are a lot of good things and people in it. So I totally understand Caleb’s sympathy for the scourger and wanting to end the conflict rather than exacting revenge on the empire.

I believe Caleb wants to try and break the cycle of abuse, which naturally involves taking out Trent Ikithon, but will probably also involve a dismantling of the larger system. Eodwulf and Astrid are both part of this, so in order to do that he'll either have to take them out as well, or convince them to defect/change their minds in some way. (I hesitate to use the words "save" or "redeem")

So the big question weighing on Caleb and preventing him from moving forward with any plans, and probably the reason he went to see Astrid despite how risky it was, is whether they were too far gone.

We know Astrid is a master manipulator, so it’s hard to know if we can believe anything she says, but assuming that she was being mostly genuine about her stance on the empire/being a Vollstrecker (a True Believer that what she’s doing is for a Greater Good, and not just mimicking what she used to hear from Bren/think he would respond to) and assuming she still cares about him (even if the feelings/situation are really complicated now and she has other motives for wanting him on her side as well) I think the answer is - it will be incredibly difficult, but not impossible to sway her.

- Obviously it’s going to take more than just revealing she was lied to, (which I think Caleb knew as well, but still kinda had to hope it would be that easy) it’s going to take a devastating blow to her whole worldview

-Not everyone survives having their worldview crumble, see Javert in Les Miserables. Caleb and I are still working through this, and may still be for a while

- A big part of why I (and many other people I know) stayed with the church as long as I did wasn’t because I emphatically believed in every single little rule, I had faith in a bigger picture/greater good, and just because I didn’t immediately see the wisdom or purpose in something didn’t mean it wasn’t there. Eventually, with exposure to other viewpoints and learning more about how these things actually affected people, I reevaluated and my personal integrity (not wanting to support something that I now found so harmful) outweighed that faith. (Which I think was also the kicker for Caleb, his personal integrity in conflict)

- It sounds like Astrid doesn’t really think of killing her parents as a good thing that she’s proud of, but has rationalized it as a necessary evil.

-She believes that the trauma of her training is integral to her being “strong”. It sounds like they may have looked down on Bren for not being able to handle it, but weirdly I think seeing Caleb now at level 10 might just reinforce the idea that more trauma = more powerful.

- She seems to think she’s above it, based on the (vaguely condescending) pity she expressed for him, but the truth is no one is immune to trauma. Everyone has thoughts and emotions, psychological needs and desires and vulnerabilities, and can be hurt mentally and emotionally.

-Also, the language about him being lost/welcomed home, is very reminiscent of church culture for me. Like, I can remember being on the inside feeling genuinely sad and concerned for someone I thought had “lost their way” hoping they would “see the light”, and now I’ve also been on the outside with people hoping I’d come to my senses and come back while I’m wishing that they could understand my perspective

-It’s very easy to get caught up in any way of thinking when it’s all you’ve ever known, even when you think you’re listening to both sides and being open minded. (Astrid clearly has her own thoughts and ideas, she’s not just a carbon copy of Trent. You can tell by how her hose stands out against the others. Pro tip: people who are brainwashed don’t think they’re brainwashed) These people have been fed Empire propaganda their whole lives and were only teenagers when they began their Vollstrecker conditioning.

-The Vollstreckers, by design, are very insular. Astrid literally lives on Ikithon’s land, and it doesn’t sound like she has any significant connections outside the organization. It’s a lot like IRL military, They make it difficult to put down roots so members have to rely on each other for everything, plus civilians aren’t going to easily understand what military desensitization is like, much less those who’ve seen actual combat. (Not to mention the whole poor/working class kids getting the promise of education and a better life from recruiters in exchange for military service thing.)

-Having outside support is key to leaving any abusive situation. The only reason Caleb was able to survive is because he was able to find support with the Mighty Nein and start building an identity outside of that. It’s a work in progress, but he has at least some kind of purpose with them, an option of something to do/be besides what he was conditioned for.

This post has probably gone on long enough, but hopefully that gives an idea of how I see those parallels. I’m really curious to get more insight into what Caleb took away from the conversation and if he thinks they’re a lost cause.

I think (at least up until this point) he’s been holding out hope that they weren’t too far gone, not only because he cared for them and had such a strong bond, but also a little bit because if they aren’t too far gone then that means he isn’t too far gone as well. And I wonder how his perspective will shift with this development.

#critical role #cr spoilers #caleb widogast #cr meta #sorry this is so long and mostly just personal rambling #I have a lot of feelings about Caleb okay?#Also religion which I haven't even talked a lot about with my therapist #I guess this is therapy now

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ais-n · 4 years

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How do you create your characters? (anon ask)

Another question from the same anon I mentioned in the other post:

In general, how do you create your characters, especially their psychology/thought process/ flaws?

haha I have two answers to this - and they depend on the level of ridiculous I’m being.

MORE THOROUGH - CHARACTER BIO TEMPLATE:

I actually have a character bio template I made so it was easier for me to track multiple aspects of characters in complex stories. You can download and adjust/use however you’d like - more info at http://aisylum.com/give-and-take/resources/ or download directly as .odt, .doc, or .rtf.

I made that for my fantasy series but you can just change whatever you want to fit better for your particular situation.

In the thorough cases like this, I will usually start with some sort of idea of the character, whatever that may be, put that into the character bio, and build out from there. Sometimes the vague idea is the gender and/or orientation, sometimes it’s their past, sometimes it’s just a snippet of dialogue I think of someone saying and I have to figure out who would say that thing in that way and why.

I also try to think about what leads to what.

Like, Boyd was starved of consistent love and stability as a child, so he came to fully believe he didn’t deserve it while also desperately and subconsciously seeking it out. But because he also had low self-esteem and other issues including a number of tragedies in his past, he became self-destructive at times in his quest for feeling loved or needed. He was willing to put the needs of others above the health of himself, if it meant he wouldn’t be abandoned. Which meant he would be reckless at times, and it meant his emotions would vary hugely when it came to relationships; he would do really stupid things out of fear of losing love or acceptance because he had wished so dearly for it for so long - but that can also backlash and lead to the very thing he feared because he was doing things at times for the wrong reasons or was too willing to compromise when it would be healthier for everyone to stand his ground.

Or, looking at my LGBTQIA+ sci-fi/fantasy/cop/murder mystery-type story Incarnations for other examples - Cypress is a type of Mage (magic-user) who is maligned by pretty much the whole world, especially by other Mages. His kind was all killed in a genocide centuries ago. For various reasons that also pertain to his past (and which would be a spoiler to dictate right now but come up later in the book), he has a huge distrust for other people, to the point at times of rage and hatred and violence. He has almost no one who has been on his side and stayed on his side from the start, except his twin brother. But that comes with its own set of fears, of what would happen if something happened to his brother?, and because he equates emotions to weakness, and he loathes weakness, he can be very aggressive and cynical and sarcastic when interacting with other people. But at the same time, precisely because he’s the type of Mage who gets hunted down and killed or detained by others, and because of how he grew up, he’s learned how to stay under the radar and how to blend in when needed. For all his rage inside, he’s very good at playing a part if he has to, and those two pieces of him may feel at direct odds to one another but they’re just two sides of the same coin. He has the rage because of who he is, and because of who he is he had to learn to not be seen. He is volatile at best when he’s being his own ‘normal’ and yet he can act totally ‘normal’ according to the rest of the world at the drop of a hat if needed. You could meet him in the middle of a grift and have no clue he’s anything other than a regular Joe Schmoe kind of dude who wouldn’t hurt a fly, when in fact he wouldn’t hesitate to brutally kill you if circumstances made it in his best interest.

Basically, I often try to think of what makes sense for how people would react to things they’ve been through (both good and bad), and then how that might affect their behavior going forward, and what would positively or negatively affect that.

One very short, truncated example I’ll give is Sloane, another Mage from Incarnations; because of an event in her past that she survived and others didn’t think she should have, she’s seen as a monster by much of the local community. She became inured to random death from a young age, so she doesn’t question things the way you might expect someone to in the same circumstances, but she also became resentful of others because of how she was treated. She was a troubled child who acted out a lot, but then she had one person who decided to keep reaching out to her, again and again, despite how often she lashed out. And that person became a sense of stability for her, that led to her doing a 180. She went from a kid who was constantly in juvie to being a cop (in this world’s equivalents). There’s a lot more to her story but that’s just a quick way of showing her past and the way people treated her affected her negatively until she had enough of a positive impact on her life from someone else that she ended up changing her trajectory.

I work through a lot of those sorts of things when filling out the character bio so I get a good idea of their past, their tendencies, their biases, etc. And then there’s a section that asks questions like what would build them up, what would bring them down, what is needed for them to progress, etc. I answer those questions as much as I can, and oftentimes get some revelations about the character along the way. And then I look at the plot of the story as a whole and see if it makes sense to include pieces along the way that will provide character progression (or regression) for the character.

That can be a good way of not only making sure characters don’t stagnate in a story, while also providing layers to the plot itself so that it’s not just about one single thing - there are multiple things happening along the way that provide something potentially interesting or fun or whatever as well.

I personally like to write stories where you can enjoy it as much or more on the second, fourth, tenth read as you did on the first... I want to try to add little things, if possible, that you may glance over the first time without enough context but later can go back and say OHHH when you know more. I find that doing that is particularly fun and enjoyable and easy when you have character progression or little character quirks you can include along the way, because it doesn’t have to be some big dramatic thing for the plot of the world or overall story. It can be something as simple as a character with long hair deciding to cut their hair off, or someone who always wears shoes and makes fun of another person who goes barefoot, now trying to go barefoot and thinking “oh crap, I get why they liked this all along.” It can be totally inconsequential things for the series as a whole that have some sort of meaning for the character or reader, big or small.

I get bored easily both as a reader and a writer so I guess to me that brings in a level of entertainment.

So essentially, I start with something that either I feel I know about the character or makes sense to me about the character, then I try to think about how they would view this thing, and then I try to think about logically what would follow based on their worldview. And that often will lead to flaws, psychology, thought processes, etc. You could think of it like “What would I do if I were them?” but try to not put your personal values in place of their own.

Like, I would never murder the fuck out of people so callously as Cypress does, but I want readers to understand why he does, and for that I need to understand too as the writer or else that’s asking way too much for the readers to understand something I don’t.

QUICKER, LESS RIDICULOUS WAY

I don’t always want to fill out a whole ass memoir/biography on a character to write or create them - sometimes I just want something simple.

In those cases, I don’t write everything down like that bio template, and I don’t go into such specific and detailed questions about every part of their past and their relationships and what they do or don’t need to get better or etc. Instead, I’ll just go with the vibe of someone - what’s the information that’s of import for them as a person and their particular story? Sometimes that’s gender, orientation, race, etc, or sometimes it’s things they like (like spooky things) or things they hate (like restrictive rules).

I try to do more of an overview of why they are how they are, and therefore how they may react to certain things, but I don’t worry myself about going deep into their thought process and psychology to know every detail of how and why. Because depending on the story, I don’t even need to know that information.

I tend to do more of a ‘surface-level’ view of characters for my short stories, because going super in depth would work against what I’m trying to do when I write those - which is develop SOME sense of brevity in my life. Somewhere lol

A good example of that mentality is probably my short story Five Star Review which is about a god and a spiritual being having a conversation in a closed restaurant. In that story, both main characters are they/them, because that’s the pronouns that worked, and they are very briefly described but barely at all. That story is more about philosophy and the way spirituality/religion interacts with humanity, so that’s what more of the focus is on. I didn’t need to know every single thing Deity (the god) has ever thought, because it’s irrelevant; I just needed to know how they would feel about the particular topics brought up in this particular story. And then, if the dialogue, plot, or otherwise leads to it, I could figure out their flaws or merits as needed, based on the sort of “person” they had already shown themself to be in the previous scene(s).

I don’t know if that helps or if all of that is more confusing. But I basically just start with something I feel I know about the character, then build on that in the context of the world or environment they would have developed in, and then just kind of follow the logic along.

Also, if that doesn’t lead to flaws or any depth of the character, I will go back and look at something central to them, and try to see if there is anything seemingly directly opposed that could be introduced as a flaw or aspect of them. Because I feel that humans are rarely one-sided, and oftentimes the complexity of us is because of juxtapositions within ourselves we have or haven’t come to terms with. So to make a character feel more “real,” I think it’s important for them to have at least two things about them that don’t, at first glance, seem like it makes sense - but it doesn when you think about them as a person growing up where they did, or how they did, or where they are now, or whatever other piece of them. Not only does that feel more nuanced as a character and more realistic, but it also introduces some internal conflict that can be used as character progression or, at the very least, something interesting to bring in when the plot is in a lull and you don’t know where to go next.

For me, the most important thing is being willing to change my presumption of the character as the writer, if the character naturally develops in a different direction. And therefore also being willing to change the plot to accommodate, instead of forcing the character to follow the plot.

Sorry this post was a million miles long..... hopefully it helps, like, at all, and isn’t just massively confusing.

#ask ais #icos #icosbooks #in the company of shadows #writing #incarnations #wildwood rising

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matsuoclan · 5 years

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Pairing: Colt x MC Rating: Teen to Mature Category: Angst(ish) with a Hopeful Ending Tag List: @sibella-plays-choices @desiree-0816 @liamzigmichael4ever @twin-skltns @choicesarehard @euphonyinestetica @navigatorholmes Notes: My study of Colt Kaneko for RoDAW! This is a HUGE departure from my usual style and was a bitch to write but I’m proud of it lol. Enjoy!

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His father wears anger like a second skin.

Teppei Kaneko’s rule over his shop is absolute, quiet until it’s not, and even as a kid Colt knows that when his Pop gets that look in his eyes it’s either hide or get caught in the blast. When Pop’s angry, he’s not the Pop who puts on car movies and makes popcorn and nudges Colt so he doesn’t miss the next part. When Pop’s angry, he’s Kaneko: dangerous, terrifying, and king.

He loves his Pop.

He fears Kaneko.

People tell him he has his father’s eyes, but sometimes when his little body shakes with so much rage it threatens to break him, he thinks he inherited something worse.

The part he hates most about falling is the wild feeling in the pit of his stomach as he plummets. The next is the impact.

Or maybe he just hates falling in general.

The water is freezing under overcast skies. It’s nothing like the pool his mother sometimes takes him to on weekends he doesn’t see his father. Instead it’s murky and agitated and his imagination kicks into overdrive, feeding him image after image of sea monsters in the depths below, ready to pull him underneath and eat him while he drowns.

He thrashes between the waves, looking up at the cliff, hoping against hope that he’ll be able to see his Pop peering over the edge to make sure he’s ok.

Pop isn’t looking down from the cliff. Colt was stupid to think otherwise.

His teeth chatter when he heaves himself out and climbs all the way back up to the top, shivering violently in his sopping clothes. Pop’s in the same position as before, arms crossed and eyes trained on the horizon. Again, he tells Colt. Jump again.

This time when he surfaces, he can’t tell if the salt on his tongue is from his tears or the sea.

At 8, Colt’s deepest secret is he wishes he had a different dad. His darkest is he doesn’t wish that at all.

Sometime between growing up and spending more time at the shop, he learns what his father actually does for a living and it’s an exciting, new world. It’s his family history, the family business, and one Colt wants more than anything to be a part of and one he thinks he’d be good at.

His father disagrees. His father disagrees vehemently. Maybe not in so many words at first, but it’s not hard to guess why Colt’s only allowed in the shop on some weekends and not others, why some conversations abruptly come to a halt whenever he draws near.

The moments etch themselves unpleasantly into his skin, because he doesn’t understand.

Pop shares every other aspect of his life with him -- teaching him to drive, to drift, anything he could ever want to know about cars -- but not what he wants most. Every time he asks, Pop gives him a short “no” with a crease between his brows and a downturned mouth as if Colt’s asking for something painful and impossible.

He barges in on a meeting once when they’re preparing for a job to demand they let him in, sick and tired of being left out, and it’s the beginning of the end. Never has he seen his father so furious, and it’s never, ever been directed at him.

In the moment, Pop and Teppei Kaneko cease being two people. Colt stops being scared altogether, opting instead to stand his ground and demand respect for being his father’s son.

Teppei laughs bitterly, and throws him out.

His mom moves away a month later, and he goes with her. She insists it’s because she found a better job in another state with a great school district and cheap in-state tuition. Teppei calls it an opportunity to explore his options and his future, but Colt can recognize exile when he sees it. There’s so much wrongness in leaving California and it pulls at him with every step he takes, leaving a hollow feeling between his ribs that he can only fill with rage, because if he stops to consider how hurt he is over being abandoned, he’ll break.

He can’t do much from where he is, not yet, but Teppei doesn’t get to decide he wants a son instead of an heir when he raised him at the foot of his throne.

Colt grudgingly does the school thing because his mom asks him to.

It wouldn’t be a bad life. He could get his degree, get an office job and benefits and a 401(k), wear pressed button-ups and wingtip shoes and go out with friends on the weekend. Many people do it, and they seem content enough. For over a year he throws himself into college, losing himself to classes and classmates alike in a blur of secondhand textbooks and shitty beer and sloppy hookups, pretending he’s there because he wants to be, just like everyone else.

To his credit, he does try. But in the end, it feels like suffocating little by little, and Colt has no interest in dying before he’s lived.

He roars back into California on his motorcycle with a different state’s license plate, carrying nothing but a rucksack and an axe to grind. Los Angeles is mostly the same: smoggy skies, congested freeways, construction on every other street. It’s comforting in its familiarity, that he can spend years away and LA will be just as much of a shithole when he returns.

The savage pleasure he gets from the shock on Teppei’s face is a good enough welcome home.

Logically he knows his father runs a crew and needs people to be in it, but it’s another thing entirely to see that most everyone is the same except for the one he’s been replaced with. Logan’s a simple pretty-boy who Colt is surprised can string more than two words together and he’s more than a little insulted that this is his replacement, but at least he’s not sent away like he expects.

What he also doesn’t expect is her.

She’s a pretty wisp of a thing that sticks out like a sore thumb and Colt hates her on sight. He’s an ass to her but she gives as good as she gets, meeting him barb for barb with a pointed glare. If he was at all inclined to fall in love with a tourist, that would do it.

He doesn’t understand why she’s there at first. By all appearances, she’s slumming it at the shop instead of spending her days studying or hanging out with a father who actually wants her around. Unlike the rest of the crew, she’s got a great future already laid out for her.

It’s not until he’s sitting in her passenger seat before her license test, observing the way she comes alive when she masters drifting and upends his entire worldview in a single breath, that it clicks, and.

Oh.

After, she bursts out of the DMV in a flurry of excitement, waving at him like mad and grinning so wide it blinds him, and his traitorous heart skips a beat.

Colt can count on one hand the number of times he’s been genuinely frozen in terror, but none come close to finding his dad slumped over in a pool of his own blood. Suddenly he’s a little scared boy again and he forgets himself in that moment, forgets that he’s supposed to be furious at his at his father, because words like blood and injury and weakness shouldn’t exist in the same sentence as Teppei Kaneko.

His bloodied hands won’t stop fucking shaking. Distantly he registers someone’s arms around him but all he knows is terror until his father wakes, and then he learns he has the Brotherhood to hate.

It is, after all, easier to be angry.

“It’s okay to admit you’re worried.”

“It’s okay if something just takes your breath away.”

She says things like that a lot, like it’s that easy. For her, it probably is. She wears her heart on her sleeve in a way Colt envies, so free with her thoughts and emotions it’s almost painful for him to watch.

Anger is his oldest, most comforting friend and the one that’s easiest to run to when the other emotions start creeping in. But she sees right through his bullshit and calls him out on it and then some and he’s left floundering, thrown off his axis by someone he thought would cut and run if he just insulted her enough.

It’s kind of nice, being proved wrong on something like that.

They jump off the cliff together, her for the first time and him for the first time in years, and the water closing in around him is different somehow: more like a friend welcoming him back after a long absence than a monster waiting in the wings to devour him. Maybe it has something to do with how he’s changed, but he thinks it has everything to do with the girl squeezing his hand.

When she kisses him, it’s clear she’s never kissed anyone before. Her mouth is clumsy against his but like each new thing he’s seen her try, she masters it quickly with the next kiss and the next and steals his breath right out from his lungs.

For the first time since returning he allows himself to want something besides what he came back for, and at the first hint of guilt instead of reaching for anger, he remembers her words.

Like she said.

It’s ok.

It’s ok to want her.

Coming up with this plan in tandem with his father is not so much crossing a line as it is setting the world on fire and dancing in the flames. Teppei looks at him differently now, has done so since the Grapevine job, and it is everything Colt has ever wanted to be trusted with his family’s legacy the way he deserves.

He takes a moment to look at his Pop, tracking his eyes over new wrinkles and larger eye bags. There’s more gray in his long strands, and a tattoo he hasn’t seen before on his forearm. Pop catches his eye and gives him a ghost of a smile.

It’s a strange thing, to relearn his father at the same time Pop relearns him.

Bitterness is not a new feeling. That he has to relearn his father at all leaves a foul taste in his mouth if he thinks about it for too long, so Colt ignores it in favor of the task at hand. He has Pop’s trust now, has a chance to prove he belongs, and the first step to doing that is to make sure the Brotherhood disappears forever.

Against all odds, the first part of the plan goes beautifully. When Mona suggests they all go dancing, it’s the promise of their freedom within his grasp that makes him say yes.

Colt isn’t a stranger to falling.

He’s been falling for as long as he can remember. But this time, he is in love with a girl with little recollection of how he got there. All he knows is the swooping feeling in his belly started before they leapt off the cliff and didn’t disappear the way it was supposed to when they hit the water. Instead it’s made itself a home inside him, growing in size until he feels he’s in perpetual nosedive every time he so much as looks at her.

The part he hates most about falling is the wild feeling in the pit of his stomach as he plummets. But in the darkness of the warehouse with each press of her mouth against his, he thinks maybe it isn’t so bad.

Love doesn’t blind him to ugly realities, and the reality is loving her doesn’t make him any less of an asshole.

There’s naked hurt on her face when she bolts out of the shop, crushed by the revelation of his father and Logan’s deception, and yet he can’t stop smiling because she finally knows the way they’ve been using her.

He doesn’t regret what he did, but he does regret how he did it. Hurting her was never on the agenda, or at least that’s what he tells himself when he catches up to her and convinces her to get in her car.

When she kisses him, he can forget just how he’s used her too.

The crew falls apart. Anything that can go wrong does. Their one chance at freedom disappears like smoke in the wind and he transforms into something ugly and jagged in the fallout, barely able to contain the fury in his voice, searching for someone to blame as he escapes with her on his motorcycle.

It is, after all, easier to be angry. Especially when he goes nauseous at the thought of finding her lifeless body in the vault had his plan continued the way it was supposed to.

But then, it doesn’t matter anymore. Any relief that she’s still alive burns up with his father and his family’s shop and then all he knows is pain and pain again. All he wants is for it to stop, barely able to hold it together in front of the others, traitorous thoughts screaming in his mind that this is somehow his fault, because it was his plan, and the awful realization makes him want to pull over and empty the contents of his stomach onto the street.

Teppei Kaneko’s blood has been on his hands in more ways than one.

He makes it somehow to the cliffs after leaving the others and it’s there in the dead of night with only the sound of waves for company that he finally breaks. Grief rises in the back of his throat as he collapses at the edge but rage, his ever-present friend, comes to his aid.

Only this time, instead of one beating the other into submission, they ally and forge a different monster altogether, taking root in his lungs and choking him from the inside out as the explosion replays over and over in his mind.

He is abandoned, all over again, by a father who thought he knew best.

Life cannot possibly be this fucking unfair but even as he thinks it, Colt knows it is. Hot tears spill messy down his cheeks and he sobs, wounded and wild, demanding for the universe to tell him where he went so wrong that his own father would think he would be better off in a world without him in it.

The universe does not answer, because the universe does not care.

He knows this, but demands anyway.

In the aftermath there is no body to bury and no shop to return to, but the ghost of Teppei Kaneko lingers in every breath of his son. Colt pieces himself together out of ashes, and begins anew.

Maybe it’s harebrained to see her when there’s a price on his head, but her surprise when he appears at her friend’s doorstep is a memory he’ll keep tucked inside his heart for a long time: shock, then wonder, then awe, and the brightest smile she’s ever given him.

He’s sure he had his reasons for not going to his own prom, but it’s hard to remember any of them when she descends, a vision in pink, down the stairs.

If she wants to go to prom, he’ll give her the best damn time he can.

It’s all so normal, this glimpse into her life, seeing her teachers, friends, classmates. She stands out from all of them in his eyes, miles above where any of them could even aspire to reach, so radiant in her happiness that he can do nothing but drown helplessly in it.

So it’s everything when he cuts himself open for her, more raw and more vulnerable than he’s ever been in front of anyone, and tells her he loves her with a shaking voice.

The more amazing thing is, she says it back.

He’s been with people before, but no one he wanted. No one he loved. He sinks into her, feeling her breath stutter out of her lungs, and whispers it over and over into her skin like a mantra, worshipping at her altar, because now that he’s said it he’s never taking it back.

I love you.

It’s not completely unexpected that the Brotherhood finds them. Like everything good in his life, as soon as he’s granted a moment of happiness it’s interrupted or snatched away. What’s different this time, is her.

He’s learned his lesson. Keeping her out of the loop for the first plan didn’t end well for anyone and in the week following his father’s death, he’s run over every little thing that went wrong hundreds of times in his mind until his heart was numb, and it all came down to secrets and lack of trust.

Too little too late, but he knows better now.

Their plan is risky, with more room for error than he’s comfortable with, but it’s the best they can come up with on short notice. His nerves shot, he squeezes her hand before she gets into her car and drives off, unable to force any sort of words out of his throat.

She squeezes back, understanding.

Everything comes down to this last showdown, what’s left of the Mercy Park Crew congregated in a high school parking lot with guns trained on them. His pulse still pounds in his ears from seeing her car roll over and over before coming to a stop roof-down, but she crawls out of a window, alive, and the tightness in his chest loosens where it sat like a stone underneath his sternum since they parted ways at Vaughn’s house.

And then it’s finished. The Brotherhood is defeated, and it is all because of her.

She goes with him to Ladera Heights and together they watch as the FBI pushes that bastard, handcuffed, out of the house. Relief and triumph and something else war inside him and it’s all he can do to keep from keeling over into the street. It’s over. It’s done. His father is avenged, and he is free, and there is nothing left to do but rebuild.

The Mercy Park Crew may be no more, but he remains, and with him, the legacy of his father and his father’s father before him.

In the moment that’s enough.

She leaves like she’s always planned to and takes half of his heart with her. Colt accepts it despite himself, because this isn’t abandonment. This isn’t about him at all. As much as he wants her to stay and rebuild with him, he doesn’t begrudge her choice to find herself and figure out her place in the world, because it’s more than anyone has ever afforded him. When she returns -- and he has a gut feeling that she will -- he will be here.

She is his driver, forever, and he will wait as long as she needs.

The taste of their good-bye is still on his tongue when he pulls up to the cliffs, parking his motorcycle to the side and trudging over tiredly to sit with his feet dangling over the edge. It’s early in the AM now, and he watches the California sky turn from midnight blue to orange to pink as the sun rises over his back.

The remainder of his heart beats slow and steady within his ribcage, finally at peace, and then he exhales and lets the sunrise take his breath away.

In the end, she finds her way back to him, and he is whole again.

Fin.

#rodaw #choices #playcoices #colt kaneko #choices rod #ride or die #colt x mc #myfic #im sorry im really bad at keeping track of who wants to be tagged jhfjdhg

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literarygoon · 5 years

Photo

So,

When trans rights activists began to mobilize in opposition to feminist thinker Meghan Murphy's appearance at the Toronto Public Library in October 2019, I was only half-interested in the controversy. Several literary figures I admire had become swept up in the pseudo-religious fervor, and I was shocked to see them enthusiastically championing censorship. I figured this person they were protesting must be some ghoulish anti-intellectual, spewing hate speech and vilifying marginalized communities. I assumed that a quick Google search would result in a list of published works worthy of this sort of opposition, or maybe news items about her provocative past.

Imagine my surprise, then, to learn that not only was Murphy innocent of the hate speech accusations she was being doggy-piled with, she was actually advocating on behalf of marginalized populations and rape victims — something I'm personally passionate about. Her highest profile dust-up was with a pedophile trans activist named Jessica Yaniv, a true villain if there ever was one, and now she was facing death threats for publicly questioning whether convicted child killers who self-identify as female should be allowed in women's prisons. As far as I could tell, she was a strong-willed social crusader making a real positive impact in the world.

So how come everyone was treating her like the Antichrist?

In the week leading up the event, I followed the controversy via Twitter and began to educate myself on the subject being discussed: trans rights. I learned that this new slur "TERF" is an acronym for "trans exclusionary radical feminist", though it was being used as a catch-all for anyone who disagreed with their rhetoric, and it wasn't immediately apparent what trans people were being excluded from. I learned that "dead-naming" someone means using someone's name from before they transitioned (like calling trans icon Caitlin Jenner by her birth name Bruce) and that there were a few koan-like mantras everyone felt strongly about: "Trans rights are human rights" and "trans women are women."

As I engaged on Twitter, posting a few comments and questions, I became increasingly aware of how toxic this discourse was. These trans rights activists were looking for people to crucify, drunk on self-righteousness, and were incapable of having a nuanced conversation about this new worldview they were wielding like a weapon. As I consumed their vitriol, following accounts on either side of the spectrum, it occurred to me that all of this anger wasn't only being funnelled towards anti-trans bigots. It was also sliming well-meaning leftists who weren't sufficiently up to date on how this conversation has been progressing (learn your acronyms!) and people blissfully unaware that this esoteric social justice battle is even happening. According to their standards, not only was I a TERF but so was everybody else in my family, from my toddler niece all the way up to my grandparents. We all believe in something we've been taught since childhood, biological sex, and that makes us the enemy.

But how could I make my own position known without offending and alienating the trans people in my life who I love, regardless of how I feel about this new gender ideology? Could I oppose the indoctrination while embracing trans people themselves? Was there some sort of middle ground I could take, where I could express my support and love for them while simultaneously refusing to drink the Kool-Aid?

Then the big night came. By this point the Toronto Public Library scandal had taken up three or four days of my attention, and I remained glued to social media so I could follow every development. I read an extremely thoughtful prepared statement by a city councillor named Gord Perks and thought "finally, a voice of reason!" only to see his contribution written off and misrepresented. Hundreds of people took to the streets, necessitating a police presence to keep the audience and speakers safe. Videos posted on Twitter showed this hate mob, led by Governor General Award-winning author Gwen Benaway, shouting violent epithets at cowed women while pretending they were the victims. These bullies were out for blood, and anything less than full surrender wouldn't satisfy them.

The thing that struck me the most during all this was that the two sides of the political spectrum were arguing different points. While one side was insisting that Meghan Murphy deserved free speech, the other side was arguing about the perceived content of her talks as they pertained to trans rights. They weren't meeting anywhere near the middle, because they weren't even having the same conversation. The result of this was that trans rights activists were passionately mobilizing certain nuances of their worldview, and demanding these tenets be accepted, while the other side was simply saying "let her talk". The protesters had smeared her as an anti-trans speaker, though that wasn't how she self-identified. For a movement so obsessed with self-identification, this was a huge blind spot. Just like misgendering someone, they were accusing her of being something she's not.

As the think pieces and news articles began to come out in the following days, I read opinions from both sides and searched for even a shimmer of mutual understanding. This divisionary rhetoric was going to have devastating consequences, I figured, including within the literary world. And if people were continuing to be scared into silence for fear of being mobbed like Murphy, how could we ever have a meaningful dialogue? Who would be the next person to inspire one of these hateful clown parades?

This was the headspace I was in when I came across a story in Flare written by Benaway in which she narrates her experience addressing representatives of the library during a feedback session leading up to the event. With purple prose, silly histrionics and self-aggrandizing rhetoric, she singles out Head Librarian Vickery Bowles (who didn't speak a word during the exchange) and accused her of being transphobic simply for supporting free speech. In the most embarrassing passage she repeatedly challenges those present to tell her which bathroom she should use, which is so off-topic it comes off as nonsensical. I couldn't take it anymore. I left a comment under the article, calling Benaway "so dishonest" for misrepresenting Bowles and Murphy, and accused her of "tilting at windmills, hard."

This was it. The first public stance I'd taken on the issue. I knew that nearly every literary figure I was associated with on Twitter probably disagreed with me on principle, and would probably only experience this as some privileged white dude punching down on a poor trans activist. That being said, I really believed in what I was saying and legitimately believed trans rights activists who were vilifying librarians and feminists needed to be fucking stopped. I felt a twinge of vertigo as I let go, allowing myself to tumble head-first down this howling rabbit hole. I'd heard that these activists are militant, sometimes going after people's livelihoods if they disagree with you, but I was feeling ready for a fight.

It was around this time that a Twitter account started retweeting some of my comments, tagging my employer Humber Literary Review, adding melodramatic captions about how I was a trans-hater. This Internet stranger made me uncomfortable, but I didn't engage, comfortable in the knowledge that my editors had known me for five years and understood I was incapable of hatred. Anyone who took a moment to read my timeline would see that I wasn't a zealot; I was just a newbie to this particular conversation, trying to make sense of what was going on in a respectful manner. Also, I wasn't interested in having a conversation about trans rights -- the issue is hardly relevant to my day-to-day life -- I was interested in talking about Meghan Murphy's right to free speech, a right that had been thoroughly trampled for no good reason.

One thing that occurred to me was that the library protest ultimately had the opposite effect of what was intended. Rather than silencing Murphy, they'd elevated her to a new level of prophet-like prominence. I'd never heard of her before, but now she was being profiled in newspapers and discussed all over social media. I'd gone from having no idea who she was to being one of her most ardent fans, keen to hear what she was up to next. And pretty soon there were titans of the entertainment world stepping in to take her side, including J.K Rowling and Ricky Gervais. The haters tried to silence her but instead set her on fire, leaving us all to watch her dance wreathed in holy flames.

Then they came for me. Three days after my comment on the Flare article, which inspired a long back and forth with a Toronto poet, Humber contacted me to say that I no longer had my position as interviews editor. According to them they were restructuring, but we were in the middle of an issue and that made no sense. I sent a few exploratory emails, one proposing a book project that would be a collection of the interviews I'd done over the years, and I was mostly met with silence. Was it possible? Would they actually pull something like this? Would they take sides with the trans mob over me? And why?

The way I figured, if the move to take away my position was actually motivated by my Twitter interactions then their real motive was both to shut me up and to distance themselves from me professionally. The hate mob who had attacked would be waiting for word that I'd been turfed, and I wouldn't give them that satisfaction. For the following weeks, and then months, I made sure to routinely tag Humber in my posts, reminiscing about my interviews of the past and looking forward to the one that hadn't yet been published with Yasuko Thanh. I sent my editor an email and asked her to retweet some of these posts, which she said she would, but then didn't. I started escalating my rhetoric, criticizing trans activists and calling out their bonkers nonsense, all with Humber's twitter handle nice and prominent in my bio.

Finally, just before the holidays, vindication came. The founding editor of Humber Literary Review, Meaghan Strimas, contacted me to say that the collective had "grave concerns" about my Twitter content (even though she admitted she rarely uses the platform) and then demanded I remove her magazine from my bio, even though my interview with Thanh had not yet been published. Her email confirmed all my concerns: they had a staff meeting without me to discuss my conduct, they took issue with my views on trans rights, and they were hoping to make an example out of me. It was two weeks before Christmas and they were picking a fight with one of their employees for no good reason. The positive relationship we'd enjoyed for half a decade wasn't enough to shield me from their poorly researched dogmatism.

I knew what to do right away: I alley-ooped the email, and a bunch of screen-shotted Twitter posts, to a journalist named Anna Slatz. She was an active participant in the trans rights conversation, and had appeared at an event in Vancouver in which activists showed up wearing a guillotine for TERFs. She was just as outspoken as Murphy, I knew, and would be just as infuriated by this turn of events as I was. This was a minor freelance gig for me, but what if it was my main livelihood? Would they come after my other job next? My fiancée was six months pregnant with our first child and now I had to worry about these pitchfork-wavers? Slatz was thorough, professional and tactful: within 24 hours my story was live on the Post Millennial website. Watching the story rack up engagements was one of the most vindicating feelings of my life.

Within hours I was contacted by the Justice Centre for Constitutional Freedoms. I'd heard of them through the Yaniv debacle, and I was thrilled to learn that their potential involvement in my case would be free of cost. I took them through what happened over the phone, step by step, and revelled in how appalled they were. I wasn't the only person who thought these activists had gone too far, targeting people's jobs and smearing them in public. They told me that if it went forward my case would have the potential to affect a huge number of people's lives, perhaps setting a precedent that would dissuade these clowns from using sinister tactics like this in the future. And I wasn't the only person this was happening to -- online there were examples of people like Maya Forstater, who lost her job for saying that biological sex is real, and others who lost gigs for something as simple as retweeting a gender critical account.

The stress and sudden attention from all this hoopla had me panicked. I was worried both about my employment, and for the financial future of my baby. As my case drew the attention of names I recognized, like Jordan Peterson, I worried that I would be submerged by this trans rights tidal wave. I knew my misgivings were shared by many, both in the literary world and everywhere else, but people were too afraid to speak the truth. For a few nights I couldn't sleep. I didn't feel like fighting; I just wanted to be left alone.

But then I began to reflect on what actually mattered. I have a number of trans friends who are intensely important to me, and it's them who are suffering the worst consequences of this toxic rhetoric. As activists continue to over-reach and inflame controversy, the blow-back is hitting people who would just like to quietly go about living their lives. They don't believe in some of the more ridiculous aims of these activists, like plugging biological males into female sports or subjecting female prisoners to the company of murderers hiding behind self-identification. They're just as embarrassed by the Gwen Benaways and Jessica Yanivs of the world, and believe just as strongly as I do in Meghan Murphy's right to free speech. They don't believe in vilifying strangers, or taking away their jobs, because that's the purview of idiots and assholes.

As J.K. Rowling recently wrote on Twitter: this is not a drill. The time for ignoring or being complacent about the trans rights conversation has passed, because it is now doing real harm not only to trans people, but also everyone else. With my daughter en route to Earth, I want to create a future where this dystopian rhetoric is a thing of the past, and I don't have to worry about her being indoctrinated into a worldview where biological sex doesn't exist. I believe that inclusion is non-negotiable, and that trans people should be embraced and supported, but that should never come at the expense of people who reject their ideology or have beliefs of their own. It's possible to love someone even if you think their worldview is nonsensical, and trying to speak sense to them is the opposite of hate speech.

You could even call it love speech.

The Literary Goon

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shadowsong26x · 5 years

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Random SW meta because Why Not

So, I’ve been thinking some about Thrawn lately (because a) I do that off and on, and b) commentary about Alliances has been on my dash again lately). And I’ve been thinking about where he works really well for me, and where he doesn’t quite hit the mark; and where a lot of the commentary from people who are not super fond of the character is coming from (i.e., the fact that he is The Smartest In The Room and the need to demonstrate that has a tendency to push back on other characters he interacts with in a bad way/sometimes makes them look less clever/competent than they actually are; I’ve particularly seen this in some of the discussions about Alliances, and it’s not entirely wrong.)

The rest is now going behind a cut because apparently I am incapable of shutting up XD

Anyway. Quick note before we get started. While Thrawn isn’t actually my favorite/a top-tier character for me, I do like him quite a bit, and most of the works he’s in. (I also like Timothy Zahn’s writing style, for the most part, though I know it isn’t for everyone.) Outbound Flight, for example, remains one of my favorite Legends novels. Also, I do like Alliances. Not as much as the first canon Thrawn novel or the stuff in Legends, but more than a few people I’ve seen comment on it. That being said, I don’t like the way Zahn writes Vader, for one thing, and I can understand where people who don’t like the way he writes Anakin and Padme are coming from, though I don’t 100% agree. I also, overall, like Thrawn in the novels a lot better than I liked him in Rebels, particularly S4.

And I think a lot of it comes down to this:

Thrawn is, essentially, a Sherlock Holmes expy*.

And, more than Moriarty or his other nemeses/notable antagonists, and probably at least as much as being Clever and solving mysteries, a lot of what defines Sherlock Holmes, and what makes stories about him good and compelling, is his relationship with Watson**.

So, with that in mind…

In each of the novels except Alliances, Thrawn has a pretty solid Watson at his side. In the original Thrawn trilogy, of course, he has Pellaeon. In Outbound Flight, he has Car’das. In Thrawn, he has Eli. And it’s interesting, because while all three of these men fill that Watson role, and have a sort of give-and-take with Thrawn that’s really fun to read about, it plays out differently with each of them, based on the relative positions they hold, and their personalities.

Eli tends to come across more or less as Done with Thrawn’s bullshit like 99% of the time, as much as he respects Thrawn’s brilliance – but, then again, while Thrawn does outrank him, they come up together/start their careers in the Imperial military together, and have parallel learning curves.

Car’das is a combination of wary and fascinated, because he’s stranded in Chiss territory and Thrawn’s prisoner, so a lot of his dynamic with Thrawn is negotiations to make the best of the situation for himself and his friends. Meanwhile, Thrawn has next to no experience with the main (from a narrative perspective) part of the galaxy, and Car’das in particular is his window into that world and has a way of thinking that intrigues him. The two of them also have a lot to learn from each other, in terms of culture, history, language, etc.

Bearing in mind that I haven’t reread his books in a while – Pellaeon, interestingly enough, despite being pretty established in his career, is in some ways even more conscious of the rank and status in play than Car’das, at least at the start. Because he is directly under Thrawn’s authority, being the captain/commander of his flagship. To the best of my recollection, he starts off serving mostly as a sounding board for Thrawn, but over time starts to bounce back, and the two of them hit their stride I think probably somewhere in the second book? And there’s a lot of cool things about their dynamic, even posthumously (on Thrawn’s end) in the Hand of Thrawn duology ten years later, where the possibility of Thrawn being back and undoing everything Pellaeon is currently trying to accomplish is something he has to thread his way through very carefully.

Pellaeon also fits the audience-surrogate/narrator part of being Watson (which becomes kind of the focus in some adaptations of the source material, to the point where a badly-handled Watson loses most of his own characteristics/cleverness) better than most of the others. And, true, all of the Watsons fill the role in this respect, since Zahn didn’t write Thrawn’s point of view at all in Legends, but Pellaeon hits those particular notes the best, IMO. I remember reading the annotated Heir to the Empire and Zahn commenting that he needed a human viewpoint character because Thrawn is, well, alien, and that’s in some cases a better way to get alien worldviews/psychology across than trying to write it directly***.

Interestingly enough, Thrawn kind of serves as an origin story for all three book!Watsons, too? Which is probably part of what makes them so compelling, that while this relationship is a hugely impactful/defining one for them, it’s not the sum total of their character or story. For example, as much as I like Thrawn and Pellaeon’s dynamic with each other, I’m almost more attached to Pellaeon once he comes into his own and builds on what he had and then lost with Thrawn. (Full disclosure – while I generally prefer the broad-strokes post-ROTJ worldbuilding in Legends to the same in canon****, I’m not super fond of a lot of the specific Legends plot points from that era; Pellaeon’s arc is one of the exceptions.) And Car’das had his own journey, building a smuggling empire and doing some light espionage on the side as the Empire rose around him. Eli, of course, we have yet to see what he’s done with himself after separating from Thrawn, but I expect he’ll have a cool story of his own, too.

…anyway, the point of all that is, giving Thrawn someone to bounce off of in the right ways, with whom he can hit that Holmes-and-Watson dynamic in one way or another, makes him work a lot better, at least for me personally, than Thrawn more or less on his own, and that works pretty well in the Legends novels and the first canon Thrawn novel.

Which brings me to Alliances and Rebels.

Alliances is kind of an interesting case to me, because there’s sort of the start to that kind of push-and-pull Thrawn gets with his Watsons when he’s interacting with Anakin, which is probably why those sections worked the best for me (despite some issues with Anakin’s POV, although I didn’t find them as jarring as other readers have). But, of course, it’s never actually going to develop properly into that kind of relationship, primarily because Anakin has already imprinted on other people/is already spoken for, so to speak, and so he and Thrawn are never going to mesh. Which does make for an interesting AU/story of what might have happened if Thrawn, or the Chiss in general, had been the ones to find Anakin/recognize his potential and take him in, as opposed to Qui-Gon and Palpatine. Buuuuuuuut that’s a separate conversation, and an AU I don’t need/will not be writing, lol.

And Vader, of course, is never ever going to fill that niche for Thrawn; which probably contributes to why that half of the novel fell a little flat for me, along with really not liking the way Zahn wrote Vader.

And then there’s Rebels.

S4 Thrawn doesn’t work as well for me overall, because there’s no one in his orbit that even approaches that dynamic. Pryce might try, but he doesn’t seem to think much of her/like and respect her in the way he does with his various Watsons. His relationship with Rukh has its own appeal, but it’s not the same thing. I mean, don’t get me wrong, S4!Thrawn is still clever and competent and badass and all of that and I do enjoy his bits, but he doesn’t draw me in/I’m not invested in him in the same way.

S3, on the other hand…

Much like the flashback half of Alliances, there’s the foundations of this kind of dynamic between Thrawn and Kallus. To the point where, if the timeline had been fudged just a little bit; if Kallus hadn’t already defected when Pryce requested the Seventh Fleet (and Eli was already gone), I actually think they probably would have headed in that direction. I think the specific interplay would’ve fallen somewhere between how Pellaeon deals with Thrawn and how Eli does, in part because of jurisdiction/whatever (which, I mean, I’m making up but Kallus is ISB, not Navy/regular military; so while he is under Thrawn’s authority, it’s not really in the same way as Pellaeon is, being the captain/commander of Thrawn’s flagship).

Which is not in any way to say that I would’ve preferred it if canon had gone in that direction, because I wouldn’t – in all honesty, Kallus’s canon arc hits, like, all of my narrative buttons, and I’m not sure it could’ve been more up my alley if it had been specifically tailor-made to appeal to me, personally. But having that potential Holmes-and-Watson dynamic underpinning Thrawn and Kallus’s interactions throughout S3 definitely adds something to Thrawn (at least for me), and probably to Kallus as well.

Long story short, Thrawn is a character who works best when he’s matched by the right deuteragonist/foil, and the places where he doesn’t work as well, at least for me, personally, support that.

(Also, I’m looking forward to Treason to see what’s become of Eli and hopefully get some more Chiss worldbuilding! Because the snippets we got in Alliances are pretty cool and one of the things I really liked about that novel. Also Pellaeon is officially a canon character as of the Rebels series finale so I’m hoping we get to see more of him, too! Either in Treason or elsewhere.)

*I don’t take credit for this reading/interpretation, btw! I think it was first pointed out to me by my roommate, though I may be misremembering. Either way, it seems accurate/makes a whole lot of sense to me, so I’m sticking with it!

**This holds true whether the relationship is romantic or platonic. This is in no way about shipping Thrawn with any of his Watsons (though, for the record, I do ship him with Pellaeon).

***This is another thing I like about the Thrawn books in general, and some of the worldbuilding Alliances gave us – Star Wars doesn’t do a whole lot with that side of things (i.e., with making aliens and the way they think/approach problems really feel alien, barring species like the Geonosians which are a little too removed, and make it hard to hit that sci-fi/fantasy sweet spot of being just the right combination of Similar But Otherworldly, if that makes sense? …tangentially related, I really should revisit that idea of an atevi Jedi at some point…but I digress). Anyway, I think it’s nice when this kind of thing is put into the universe. And since the Chiss Ascendancy and the Empire/Republic don’t have a lot of contact, it can be handled a lot better/more credibly with them, given the way the galaxy is built. So I appreciate that Zahn does that.

****I.e., the way the New Republic is set up; how the remainder of the Galactic Civil War played out over the next few years; a few other things; to the point where anything I write in that timeframe will absolutely be a blended canon, even beyond what I already do as a matter of course, integrating characters/specific locations and situations I like from the canon!ST with something like the broader Legends backdrop I prefer – with allowances, of course, for how AU I’ve gotten on the way to ROTJ. I mean, to be fair, once we get past roughly the Hand of Thrawn duology, I start getting a bit cranky at the worldbuilding again, but that’s when the plot points I dislike start taking over. But for those fifteen/twenty years, for that foundation, I prefer the Legends setup to the canon one. …and any more on the subject will be a long digression on my feelings about the ST in general which are out of place for this essay. Short version: I really like almost all of the new characters, but I’m not super invested in the story that’s being told with them.

#meta #star wars #star wars meta #thrawn #shadowsong rambles at great length

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awed-frog · 6 years

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About your griffin post, about it being Protoceratops... It's not true. Mark Witton did an in-depth discussion about it.

Yes, about that - as I said in the notes, I’m grateful to the person who posted the link because I’d never heard of any of that, and the more diverse perspectives on stuff, the better. That said, a few things about his rebuttal (and yours):

1. When it comes to religion, mythology and folklore studies, there’s no such thing as ‘true’ and ‘not true’. You can categorize theories with other words, such as ‘likely’, ‘probable’, ‘possible’ and ‘utter troll dung’, but those are not exact sciences, so while it’s possible to follow a rigorous and scientific approach, it’s difficult (or even impossible) to prove anything in a definite way.

2. Adrienne Mayor’s book had an interdisciplinary approach. Mark Witton’s article did not. Now, this is more to Mayor’s credit than to Witton’s demerit, because you’re not going to contact fifteen colleagues for a blog post, but it’s worth noting that the lack of interdisciplinary research is a huge problem in academia, and it’s especially noticeable in ancient history (or maybe I notice it more because it’s my field, I don’t know). Since people tend to be either word-minded or numbers-minded, what you get is a series of extremely well-prepared specialists looking at stuff - while being completely ignorant of 98% of the world they’re examining. An ancient Greek scholar, for instance, will know a lot about linguistic shifts but squat about bread making, and that’s a bad way to understand a whole culture. Mayor, who’s more on the word side of the equation, made an effort to consult with science-oriented colleagues; Witton didn’t do that (although, as I said, that’s perfectly normal for the writing format he was using) and it shows.

3. About his first argument, ie that griffins are found in Near Eastern art: who cares? What you need to do here is not look at how you see the world, but at how a Greek person would see the world. Near Eastern griffins are not relevant - not because they don’t exist (they do) or because they’re not objectively fascinating (they are). They’re not relevant because they’re not mentioned in this context by Greek texts. None of the authors Mayor discusses made a connection between the Central Asia griffins and the Persian griffins. Maybe they didn’t know about the other ones, maybe they saw them as different animals - I honestly don’t know. But if they didn’t draw a connection between the two thing, then neither should we. I know mythology books tend to have categories on ‘monsters’ and offer enthralling images of ‘sirens’, ‘giants’ and ‘demons’ from around the world, but the fact is, how a specific culture understands that monster is likely to differ a lot from what their neighbours think of them. Sphinxes are a good example. There’s the Egyptian sphinx and the Greek sphinx - those are never discussed in the same papers because, despite the fact they do have superficial similarities, they’re very different creatures in what concerns their role in their respective societies’ religious and conceptual landscapes.

4. About his second argument, ie that protoceratops bones are not as widespread as she suggests, and one wouldn’t trip on skulls every two seconds - again, so what? As long as those fossils can be placed in that area at the right time, I’m good. This is not a scientific experiment the Scythians are carrying out: one skull is enough to suggest a story behind it, one trader sharing that story in his travels is enough to make it grow, and one bartender telling Herodotus about it is enough to validate it. The Amazons are a very good example of how that works. The idea of a tribe of women warriors had fascinated the Greek for centuries (they’re mentioned in the Iliad) before Herodotus wrote about them confirming they were real people doing real stuff. Western scholars have been scoffing at him ever since - and they kept scoffing until Soviet archaeologists started finding graves of women who’d been buried with weapons. Now - did archaeologists ever find a cemetery that was 100% badass female warriors? No. Did they find a cemetery that was 50% female warriors? Also no. To the best of our current knowledge, some of those Siberian-based tribes had - occasionally - warrior queens, or high-status women who used weapons. They were not Amazons in the traditional sense of the word, but it’s not that hard to imagine what must have happened there: one foreign delegation headed by an armed queen would have been enough to make any Greek go wtf and ooooohh, because that would have been so exotic - Greek women didn’t use weapons (and neither did Persian women, or Egyptian women - cultures some Greeks would have been familiar with) - so the sight of that must have left quite a deep mark. And since that’s how humans work, one warrior queen can become ‘a whole race of man-hating badass women’ in two seconds flat. I mean, we know that’s how storytelling works, and what happens with dubious or spotty record keeping, but also - how many times has that happened to you? You meet one Korean guy, he’s the only Korean you know and he’s an asshole - before you know it, you start to assume that’s what all Koreans are like. It’s just how we’re wired, and I guess it was supposed to be about protecting us from poisonous plants (‘Sure, that other red berry almost killed my brother, but what about this one?’ - that would have seen us extinct in no time), but it’s also something we need to keep in check, because no - people are not ‘all the same’ just because they belong to the same ‘tribe’.

5. Another argument he makes is that Central Asia to Greece is rather a long distance for Chinese whispers and legend swapping, and that’s so wrong I don’t even know what to say. This is exactly what I meant when I said people can be experts in their field (in Witton’s case, paleontology) while being pretty ignorant about others, because the ancient world was way more connected than what we imagine it to be. We know that even in prehistoric times, there were crowded trade routes moving from the Baltics to Greece, that people travelled hundreds of miles to go to some sanctuary on a Scottish island, and that yeah - ideas and legends did travel with goods, sometimes in a very lasting way. The traces of Buddhist doctrine, for instance, are all over Greek philosophy. This is a subject that’s only recently been explored because people like to believe Greek culture was born fully-formed without any foreign influences, but the studies on the exchanges between India and Greece - well before Alexander’s times - are fascinating. So no, I’m not disturbed in the slightest by the fact news about ‘griffin skulls’ seem to have travelled from the Gobi to Athens. That stuff happened, and as I mentioned above, all you need is one person - one guy who’s well-spoken enough, convincing enough, or convinced enough - one guy who doesn’t want Greek traders anywhere near his gold-stuffed mountains - talking to a second person. Today we’ve only got about 10% of Greek literature, but Greeks were an inquisitive bunch, and the country was littered with self-styled historians, geographers and anthropologists who spent their time either traveling around or paying drinks to whomever seemed foreign enough to be interesting. That method has limits, by the way - I myself once invented a fair bit of my town’s history because I was sixteen and bored and those tourists had seen me with my Latin textbook and asked me if I knew anything about Roman settlements in the area, so. I mean - half of a Greek historian’s paragraph start with ‘A man in Samos told me’ - God knows who they were even talking to. A local priest keen to increase tourism, the village idiot - anything’s possible.

6. Finally, something else that’s just uh is how Witton says, why single out griffins? What about other monsters? And, well, that’s the whole point of Mayor’s book. We know for sure ancient people found fossils; what we’re trying to figure out is what impact (if any) that had on their worldview. For instance, fossils did not suggest the idea of evolution, but they did mess with (or confirm) some of their religious beliefs. I’m hoping to summarize other chapters of Mayor’s book in more detail, but just a couple of examples: the Greeks, like many other ancient people, believed their ancestors to have been much taller and stronger than themselves -

(This, by the way, it’s another tantalizing way the outside world may - or may not - have influenced thought and belief: did the Greeks believe that because of the monumental architecture older cultures had left behind, or did those staggering things confirm an idea that had sprung from a different source? Like, humans tend to be pessimistic mofos, so it’s plenty possible you’d assume people are becoming smaller and weaker just because, and next the finding of a Daedalic temple just confirms that for you, because how the hell could anyone built that and Jesus Christ? Or maybe you find that temple first, and adjust your theology accordingly. We just don’t know. Hell - we’re struggling to explain contemporary religious phenomena - everything and anything from ISIS to spontaneous lynchings in India to cults - we have zero chance of fully understanding Greek religion in a way that allows us to say, ‘that’s right’ or ‘that’s wrong’.)

- and they also believed in monstrous giants dying in riverbeds (many Greek rivers are named after giants). Both things are probably related to the giant-ass femurs which kept cropping up in fields and - well - riverbeds, so no - griffins are not the lone exception. We know of people finding stuff they assume to be giant bones, divine cattle, cyclops - if you can think of it, there’s probably a fossil for it.

Ultimately, I just want to say: Mayor does offer some rather sweeping statements, but, then again, her book is aimed at a general audience. Too many conditionals and no one’s buying it (or understanding it). On the other hand, she also never pretends to hold any Universal Truth over the subject she’s exploring, because that’s how (good) academia works: you expect (and encourage) rebuttals, corrections, discussions. That’s how we progress.

Personally, what attracts me to these theories is that they’re part of a movement that’s arising - bloody finally - acknowledging man is not the centre of the known and unknown universe.

Until very recently, we were told the physical world has zero influence on what we think and how we feel - because we’re a superior animal, that is, so that stuff doesn’t touch us in the same way it does other (lower) beasts. And while that is true to an extent - if there’s an inconvenient river, we move it - saying that the world around us has no impact on our souls, brains and way of life - that’s just laughably pretentious. We now know something as banal as the weather can completely transform our mood and our decision-making, even on the long term - that trees make us smarter, that urban landscapes are likely to give migraines - there are studies in experimental archaeology in how landscape influences thought (like, you bury someone in a fetal position because the ground is too hard, you make yourself feel better by imagining he’s like a baby in the mother’s womb and will one day be reborn), and a lot of new ideas about folklore and religion. This line of studies on fossils is one example of that; another is how geography impacts theology - I don’t remember who it was, but I know someone suggested the reason human sacrifice is more common in tropical cultures is because in a jungle, death will immediately (and very visibly) feed new life, whereas in colder climates the relation is not that apparent. And again, it may never be possible to prove right and wrong there. Even if we had a time machine, these things are tricky to understand. People think of faith and belief in different ways, approach their religion through their own filter, will pretend to go along with stuff for personal gain. Who knows. The only thing we can be sure of is that those fossils would have been understood differently by different people. To some, that would have been proof of mythical monsters. To others, a way to strengthen their flock’s faith and thus cement social cohesion. And to others still, it was probably just a way to make money - a temple displaying a ‘griffin skull’ would have led to people selling griffin statues and opening griffin-themed restaurants, same as you see today in places like Lourdes or Fatima. Humans are messy. History is messy. That’s what’s beautiful (and infuriating) about both.

#ask #griffins #mythology #greek mythology #religion #mark witton #sorry i'm not including links #i'm late for a job #gaaaaaah #i hope this made sense?#but i'm open to discuss this of course #witton's perspective was genuinely interesting

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lesamisandlesmiserables · 6 years

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Some Uncommon Study Tips and Tricks that are Actually Practical

Some of us are coming up on finals, others of us have them in the future. Regardless your friendly uni-going Mod-Fantine has some personal tips and tricks for studying and school. Our Mod-Marius can attest to these tricks as he has used them. There are a lot of “tips” and “tricks” out there that say they can help but in reality, do very little besides giving the illusion of success. When the essay or test is on the line we need to get down to business!

*I am an American university (college) student. I tried to make my tips as broad as could so everyone in all grades/years could gain something from these tips.

Pomodoro technique

This technique is good for those of us who get distracted on our phones (aka all of us). Basically, it doesn’t matter how long you study, it only matters that when you are studying, you are only studying. So if you can study for 10 minutes without getting distracted, that’s great. It is better to get 10 minutes of good studying in than 10 hours of distracted studying. However long you study well for taking a short break after and then go back. I myself do 25 minutes with 10-minute breaks for math or science. English and anything with writing I do 45 minutes with a 10-minute break.

Focusing

This is a weird tip but if you have trouble focusing pretend you are in a movie. Pretend like there is a study montage. I know this is weird but it helps me and I have no idea why.

Handwriting your notes

My professor told me that you can absorb more of the material if you rewrite your notes in your least dominant language. Now, I am not bi-lingual so this seemed like a throwaway trick. But I found that cursive is my non-dominate writing form and found when I wrote my notes in cursive I had to focus on each word and therefore absorbed more.

Highlight could be bad

When reading something it may be tempting to just highlight sections. RESIST THE URGE! Highlighting feels good, it feels academic but it is an empty activity. What I do is when reading a book, I write notes either on a sticky note or on the book. Then when going back to find quotes I read my notes and easily find the quote. Then and only then do I highlight anything. Making notes/ summaries of each paragraph is far more useful than simply highlighting.

Writing and mechanics

Avoid adverbs! No one jogs quickly but they can run. No one walks heavily, they trudge. Get to the point and then get out. Don’t hum and haw, your reader does not want their time wasted. This is particularly important in university where professors will want academic writing. Creative writing is a different beast altogether, there you can use your lovely adverbs.

One writing tool that I use that is free is http://www.hemingwayapp.com/ . This site allows for you to copy/paste your writing in and then it will check for errors, passive voice and other writing no-no’s.

How to Write a Killer Intro to an Essay

I follow a simple formula with all of my essays. If you have trouble with intros I follow this scaffold.

Famed (PROFESSION), (Person’s name) in his/her (media type) “TITLE” asserts that... (THESIS).

Example: Famed author Victor Hugo in his novel Les Miserables asserts that people can change. Although, today the idea of change is not so strange in the 1800s the people believed no one could change for good. Examining cultural documents one can see this worldview and the impact it had on societal moral.

This is short and to the point. Professors and teachers rarely like to see rambling and “clearing your throat” paragraphs. Get in and get out.

Preparing for Class

Before going to class Wikipedia the author or topic. I cannot count the number of times a professor will ask about background even though it wasn’t assigned. Knowing just a little about the author or the context of the writing can go a long way in understanding the piece and showing your teacher that you are engaged

Connecting with your instructor

Some might call it brown nosing, kissing butt or polishing apples, but in reality, having a good relationship with your instructor is key! If you have a good connection that your teacher is more likely to move that B+ to an A-. Additionally, showing your engagement will also help if you need an extension. If you show that you know the material and are not just faking it, instructors are more likely to give you leeway. Success comes from what you do but also your grade hangs on by whoever is doing the grading.

These now are just general mental health tips during this stressful time.

Smart is a Bad Word!

When you study you are bound to come across a moment when you think “I’m not smart enough”. ERADICATE THIS WORD OUT OF YOUR MIND! Smart connotes innate skill. Very few of us come into this world initially skilled at a subject. Instead pride yourself on being hard-working. Hard-working is something you can get better at and improve on. Hard-working is directly correlated with what you do and the grade, any label you or anyone puts on you is just a label.

The Value of Failure

None of us are perfect, in fact, I recently got a C on a paper that I worked hard on. But in reviewing your papers I like to do an Author’s Response Feeback. Basically what you do is find one piece of criticism that your instructor left on your paper. Rephrase what they said in your own words, then find one example of this in your writing and explain why what you did was incorrect and how you can improve this point. When I say “improve” I don’t mean thinking ‘I’ll work on it longer’. On my last paper, I said, “I will improve upon narrowing the topic so that I do not have a lot of huge ideas existing without a payoff.” We might not like to admit it but you can learn just as much from failure as you do success.

MOST IMPORTANT

Know your study style. None of these tips may help you and that is a-okay! If you study best some other way that contradicts any of these points, then continue on with that method!

HAPPY STUDYING!!!!!

Random Resources

For AP Biology or any biology: https://www.youtube.com/user/bozemanbiology

Math: https://www.youtube.com/user/khanacademy

English: http://www.hemingwayapp.com/

#mod fantine #study #midterm #study tips #school #finals #end of term #practical tips #college #uni #university #highschool #6th form #GCSE #A levels #middle school

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dirtywrat · 4 years

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Transition scenes ftw

.X.

Eriibeus’ personal research log, 442.89AU

The people of Rolveon IV are currently undergoing what could be considered an equivalent to an early middle ages, characterized by petty king and queendoms or small city-states, as well as a general lack of record-keeping or cultural output. Their current timeline is marked as following the invasion and subsequent defeat of the Obrox armies around 230-sum years prior. They are primarily a feudal society, separated into those who work, those who fight, and those who pray, and their overall worldview is highly theistic.

They have yet to conceptualize most scientific studies; their observations of the natural world are explained via religious texts, and those within the clergy are often the most highly educated. They do have words for several basic sciences—anatomy being the first—and some simple protosciences such as astrology or alchemy, but they appear to think of these subjects as completely dissimilar to one another, totally uncorrelated. Sadly, the majority of advancements made by Rolveon ancients seem to have been lost to time. Scientific documents kept by the Obroxian Empire were either lost during the invasions or destroyed afterwards by the remaining populace under the belief that they were ‘Obrox heresy’.

They seem to be rather petulant people, waging wars of aggression against neighboring domains or initiating conflict with their fellow Rolveon with little rational consideration placed before their impulse. Despite this, or perhaps because of it, they take the practice of medicine and study of anatomy extremely seriously, as evident by their notably low mortality rates and individual cases of surgical success, all despite the constant infighting. Physicians are typically clergy members, and are often among the local monarch’s head advisors. An increased need for medical knowledge seemed to have developed around the time of the Obrox invasions and has since been on a steady incline of progress. It is this medical prowess which is my reason for being here.

Word of their intrigue has spread quickly among some of the biology forums I subscribe to online, and I have found myself enthralled enough to spend mine and Kathria’s downtime interacting with their people and studying them directly, rather than from a standard orbital observation post. Their practices are not perfect and they still have much to learn. They are often far from accurate as well, considering they still place much of their reliance on their gods or unseen forces which they cannot control. But regardless, they work with surprisingly sophisticated models for surgery and treatment of illness. I’ve done my research and no documentation of any known galactic civilization having visited the grounds of Rolveon IV in the past exists, so I am left to believe that these are their own unassisted discoveries.

I have been accepted to serve as an apprentice under the personal physician of King Acruxum of Okuil, a relatively poor and unknown kingdom which mostly serves as a stopping point between the nearest higher-profile domains. I figured this would be helpful in my attempt to remain off the Rolveon radar. In order to be accepted for this apprenticeship, I was required to undergo an exam, which was very similar to an exam I may have taken in early primary school. There were many inquiries about basic medical and anatomical subjects where the answers would be true to most forms of life, as well as a literacy evaluation. Needless to say, I passed. I was also required to swear an oath that I would devote my practices to serve their gods solely, but I have no intention of holding true to that pledge.

I have disguised myself as one of their people using basic hologram software I downloaded off of some Earth website since it was free, so I did not anticipate the highest quality of computer programming. I made alterations to it myself to ensure a more natural look and higher stability. It would surely be an embarrassing slip should the program fail while I am surrounded by Rolveons. I claim that I am from a made-up city-state very far south of Okuil, a place I declared ‘The Council of Troverdon’, where the status of a scholar is held above that of a king.

Kathria has expressed to me her concern with this mission of mine, claiming that it has potential to interfere with the natural development of these people, and is thus ‘unethical’ for whichever reason she has chosen this time. I disagree, as my intention is not to interfere, but to strictly observe as they go about their daily lives. The idea is really no different than the purpose of the observation posts themselves. My apprenticeship begins tomorrow, and I am eager to bear witness to their fascinating practices first-hand.

.X.

“Should I waste my breath a final time by telling you not to do this, or will you simply disregard my words again?” Kathria asked sarcastically as Eriibeus made some final adjustments at the teleporter control panel. Accuracy was always a necessity when utilizing this device, but for these purposes it was of even greater importance to ensure that he be transported far from civilization, lest the religiously-minded people of Rolveon IV witness his sudden manifestation.

He flattened his antennae, thoughtful. Not in rethinking his mission, of course, but rather searching his mushroom bodies for a new response to this argument they had already had countless times since their arrival into orbit. “Kathria, please, believe me when I say that it will be alright. I’ve already told you that I will be there to observe, nothing more. I’ve taken the precautions necessary to secure an unsuspecting infiltration. They will be none the wiser of an alien presence.”

He briefly paused from his tapping on the dashboard. “And even if things should go poorly and they discover I am not one of them, the Rolveons wouldn’t understand the things I could show them, anyways. It would all be boiled down to mere religious superstitions,” he went on.

She scoffed, folding her arms in a display of contempt. “And that is any better? Feeding their beliefs in imaginary forces?” Her frustration was reaching its hilt. As someone who had dedicated her life thus far to upholding philanthropic principles across the Milky Way, the idea of tampering with a defenseless group of people for intellectual gain left a sour taste in her mouth. “Eriibeus, this mission of yours reeks of carelessness. These people are only in their infancy, no different than either of us could have been but a few millennia ago. They are young, not stupid. They could very easily be taught the significance of our knowledge if given the time.”

“Well, then I will not give them the time. I will leave immediately should any issue arise.”

Kathria shook her head. How could a member of the species dubbed the most brilliant minds of the modern galaxy be so oblivious to what she thought obvious? There was far too much potential for error, which may even cost lives, and affecting the natives now would have a huge impact on their development later. “I worry over this. Any amount of influence that you instill onto these people, no matter how trivial it may seem to you, is completely unethical. Being in such close proximity to powerful people is surely not an aid to your case.”

Ethics. Eriibeus could have laughed, but he did not dare make Kathria aware of his amusement. It was generally believed amongst his people that subjective things such as ‘ethics’ had no place in research, as they merely slackened the accruement of valuable data. Humans and their moral qualms...

He had heard plenty of this. With a few final tunings, the teleporter was ready for transport, coordinates set for several miles outside of Okuil in the sparsely populated countryside. He would have to walk the main path some distance before reaching the kingdom, but patrolling forces traveled the road frequently and ensured security even outside of civilization.

He touched the screen one final time to power up the clear tube stationed across from him. Its design was minimalist: a chamber large enough for a single target, and a thin pad lining its base where the dematerialization would take place. These domestic models were much smaller than the massive commercial-use teleporters which could transport many targets at once. It was constructed from a transparent aluminum, giving the structure the appearance of being crafted out of glass. Once activated, its door glided open in a circular motion conforming to the device’s frame, any seams between the individual components of the machine completely unrecognizable. These were the designs of his people, the Phosnoi of Zorian Prime.

Eriibeus stepped inside and Kathria followed him as he positioned himself on the center of the pad.

“I realize that no laws exist which prohibit independent researchers from interfering with primitive peoples, but even if the blatant disregard for their cultural integrity doesn’t bother you, you are putting your own safety and the safety of the citizens of Okuil at risk. What should happen if you find yourself in a situation you cannot merely walk out of?”

Eriibeus’ antennae twitched and he sighed. This was annoying. “Again, and for the last time, I am not interfering. And do you truly believe that the Rolveons are capable of harming me, Kathria?”

“Of course I do, as anyone would be well-suited to overpower you, Eriibeus.”

He knew this to be true, but he glared anyway.

“Do not underestimate these people. You’ve stated in your notes that while very clever, they are also naturally inclined towards hostility with one another.”

He seemed to consider this for a moment, but soon after shook his head and the door glided shut before him. The built-in decontamination system activated instantly and misted him with disinfectant. It was an automatic process for these machines to do so.

“It will be fine, I assure you.” If Phosnoi physiology allowed them the ability to smirk, Eriibeus likely would’ve. “No risk is too great in the pursuit of knowledge.” And with his final word, a ball of teal lightning sparked within the glass bottle and died in a single blink of the eye. Eriibeus had vanished, and would arrive on the surface of Rolveon IV in several seconds.

She let out a single laugh. The Phosnoi were renowned across the galaxy for their insatiable thirst for knowledge, which in turn often translated into recklessness to most outsiders. After all the time they’d spent together, what Kathria once found endearing, she now found very aggravating at times like these. “The irony is not lost on me, Eriibeus. Foolishness in the pursuit of knowledge is still foolishness the same.”

.X.

Following a loud crack of what could be mistaken for thunder, a teal laser beam broke the stormy Rolveon clouds and touched the ground below, serving as the very first artificial link between heaven and earth the planet had ever seen. It lingered for a moment while emitting a high-pitched, almost-inaudible whine, and after it dissipated, a perfect copy of Eriibeus’ cells materialized in its place. He was now off Kathria's ship—the SSE Pax Concordia—and on the surface of the planet, approximately five miles from Okuil.

It was all crops and fields within a ten mile radius around the kingdom’s limits, with rustic farmhouses and holds dotted sparsely across the land. Beyond the farmlands were dense forests nearly untouched by the influences of man, aside for some miles of road disappearing into the trees. From where he landed, he could see the highest peaks of the kingdom’s architecture protruding from its defensive walls, but it was still to be a significant trek for his weak Phosnoi physique. His people were scientists, or mathematicians, or doctors, or engineers. They were not warriors, nor were they particularly impressive athletes even.

Eriibeus groaned at the thought. Kathria would have been quick to call him lazy just then, but he was usually content to place the blame on his frail alien body. He laid his three-fingered hand out flat, and in his palm materialized a thin remote with only three controls, sleek and arcane in its design as were the technological signatures of his people. It was such a simple device, comparable to a cell phone, but the people of this planet would fail to understand these things. He took note of this prospect. The technology his people were known for were marvels of physics and engineering, but far from the realm of impossibilities.

He input a specific pattern among the remote buttons to activate the hologram, and in a digital flash, he appeared as one of the Rolveon people. As a child, he would toy with these cloaking hologram programs to play make-believe games with others his age. It was an interesting invention, but hardly anything impressive. A member of his or any other equal galactic-scale community would see right through the seams of this clunky disguise, but to a primitive mind any ideas of ‘holograms’ were as of yet unthought-of.

The hologram left Eriibeus feeling no different, for it altered his outward appearance only. No changes were made to his actual physiology, no internal components removed or added in the process. Prior, he stood at roughly 220 centimeters, but he now appeared to have shrunk to an unimpressive 170, as was typical for the modern adult male Rolveon. A combination of Rolveon IV being a higher-gravity planet and a lack of substantial nutrients in local diets meant for a short-statured populace. He remained bilateral with two arms and legs and now four fingers on each hand, two eyes and two nostrils in the center of his face above the mouth. His form was much stockier and now mammalian, a direct contrast to his true insectoid frame. He had dark hair atop his head in place of antennae, and ears and lips on his face where there once were none. While the large Phosnoi eyes did indeed possess an iris, it was obscured underneath a compound lens. In his disguise, both iris and sclera were now distinct.

Eriibeus looked down at himself. He felt as though the ground were now so close that he could touch it without bending his spine. Once clothed in a standard lab coat and black pants, he now wore a tunic tucked into leggings with various laces holding the adornments together. It was precisely what he had worn when he arrived to take his entrance exam, but the Rolveons would not notice this. It was simply a limitation of the programming which dictated he could not change, but frivolous things such as a wide selection of clothing were a luxury for common folk here.

On the ground beside him sat a hide bag of his luggage: technology of a future era and a spiral-bound notebook for his writings. In his pocket was a document signed by Acruxum confirming he hailed from ‘the city-state of Troverdon’, and he was merely here to learn. He brought nothing more because he did not intend on sleeping here. He would return to The Pax Concordia upon nightfall.

Well, he figured. I suppose I should be on my way... Even within the confines of his own mind he could not feign enthusiasm for the long walk ahead. Having to leave his residence for these field missions was the aspect of this which made him reconsider his hobby. He picked up his luggage by the straps and slung it over his holographic shoulder, and then he began down the road towards Okuil.

The walk alone would probably have one believe that Rolveon IV was an abandoned planet, not a single sign of sapience to be found. Eriibeus found this peaceful. Not quite as peaceful as the low hum of deep space he had grown so fond of, but local wildlife sang their songs and insects buzzed in the foliage as he went and there were no people around to disturb him. The fresh scent of ozone before the rain was one of his favorite aromas, and out here it filled the pheromone proteins of his concealed antennae like a liquid.

It wasn’t until Eriibeus was roughly one mile from town that he saw anyone at all. It was two guards riding down the path atop their domesticated transportation, a man and a woman. The man wore pants and the woman a long skirt which almost covered the toes of her leather boots, but both wore metal hauberks and coarse surcoats to cover their chests and shoulders, and matching coifs which shielded their heads to the bases of their throats. As the invention of gunpowder had yet to be conceived here, they were armed with tempered blades and small daggers, and were likely the only ones around to be equipped as such. No one was supposed to carry a weapon.

He waved as he passed them and between the two he did not receive a wave in return, but what he did receive was a pair of scowls and a snort of disdain from the animals they rode. The forum posts he had read online nearly all agreed upon the seemingly natural inclination towards social aggression the natives displayed. However, all of these observations were results from orbital research posts, none from any sort of active study. He anticipated being looked at strangely for being an outsider, but figured it wouldn’t be a challenge to ignore. Already, he felt ostracized here. Not as though it mattered to him if these people accepted him or not, but this would make his efforts to remain inconspicuous slightly more difficult.

He felt a surge of ice shoot down his spine and he lowered his hand and faced forward, instead. Hopefully the rest of his encounters would not be as awkward.

Eriibeus internally rejoiced once the path finally gave way to an incline of stone steps leading to the massive gate, locking the dangers of the outside world away from civilization. The climb was not particularly demanding, even for him, as the steps were not too steep at all, and as he ascended to the top, he was met with two more guards posted at either side of the entrance.

Before taking notice of him, the two were idling along the wall, chatting and laughing between themselves. Not quite the pinnacle of diligence, but Okuil was a kingdom which seldom saw visitors. One put their hand to the air, demanding Eriibeus not move any further. “Traveler, halt!”

Eriibeus did as he was ordered.

The guard paced forward with slow strides, a humorous show of arrogant authority. “From whence do you hail, sir? We haven’t supply boy nor messenger due for several cycles of the suns.”

Eriibeus hesitated, greatly wishing he had brushed up on the speech patterns of these people before he made landing. “Er... I come from the south. I am here to see the Cleric.” Short, concise sentences typically transcended language with the help of the universal translator.

Eriibeus produced the document from his pocket and extended his arm to show the guard, who in turn lifted his hand again, this time with dismissal. “Your efforts are for naught, traveler. I do not read.” He raised a brow. “What affairs could a wretched southern man have with the king’s Holy Cleric?”

“I am his new apprentice.”

He scratched at his chin. “A scholar, eh?”

Eriibeus slid the page back into his pocket. “Uh, yes. We hold scholars in very great regard from, uh, ‘whence I hail.’”

“Is that so?” The guard cracked a mocking grin. “And you have yet to speak the name of such a wondrous place.”

“The Council of Troverdon. We have a small population. Perhaps less than Okuil. Scholarly pursuits are where we prevail.”

The guard narrowed his eyes, resting his hand atop the handle of his sheathed sword as if giving Eriibeus a warning. “I traveled long ways with strides uncounted for many years before retiring to Okuil, and I have never heard of such a place in the south before now.”

“We are new.”

Neither man said anything. Rather, the two held eye contact for what Eriibeus thought was a very uncomfortable amount of time, but he did not shift. The guard looked back to his fellow, who merely shrugged.

“Very well, but rest under tonight’s twin moons knowing that I will ask of this place to any merchant or caravanner who may happen across our bounds, and should I find telling of your dishonesty, we will have you put to the stocks.”

Eriibeus was hardly shaking. “You will find nothing against me.”

With a final disgruntled sound, the guard pried the great gates open and gestured for Eriibeus to step inside, and immediately upon entry, he felt a sense of security within the enclosure of the ancient stone walls. He had come here several days earlier to take his exam, but did not venture far into the community. It was small and cramped for personal space, hardly two feet apart between individuals. If anyone were to get sick here, the entire population would likely feel the effects, he mused. That was a frightening thought to him.

Some residents lifted their heads as he entered the town, but most kept to their busy ways, brushing past him where they could and almost causing him to drop his luggage at several instances. He did attempt to stand for a moment to take in the scenery, but a barrage of Watch-It!’s and Move!’s came at him from every angle as the demanding villagers attempted to get around. It was best to keep moving in these streets, which he did. The road from the entrance led straight to Acruxum’s castle at the very back of the city.

Okuil had a population of less than seventy, but the roads were narrow and the village itself was very small, about 2 miles in diameter, thus giving the illusion of being much more congested than it actually was. It was built upon the ruins of an ancient Obroxian stronghold as were most settlements of the era, and it was easy to identify where the Obrox architecture ended and modern Rolveon construction began. The dark stone structures covered in varying vegetation and mosses were of Obroxian origins; the round wood huts with thatched roofs held together by dried mud were erected by the modern Rolveons.

It was very quaint being here among the citizens, he found. Although Eriibeus had been to primitive planets such as this one before, he had never directly interacted with the natives or been inside their dwellings.

He walked just as he had been moments sooner, and his real thighs were beginning to burn from all of it. Market stalls were situated on the sides of the already-too-narrow roads, manned by shouting attendants that gave him a headache, and the ancient multi-story structures towering over the wooden huts funneled him down a specific route. Playing children weaved around him and domesticated animals kept pace with traffic. It was overwhelming how busy this place was for its size.

The road then opened into the courtyard, which appeared to be the main gathering point for the community, and after the courtyard was the castle. The castle itself was not very grand; it was the tallest building of the village but only barely. The monarchs of this village were not a wealthy line. Its ground was level with the rest of the town, the courtyard directly outside of its large doors. There was no moat, no defenses, not even a single guard to be found. People were playing and working and tending to their stalls as though they were not on the doorstep of royalty, and he saw that the castle doors were left wide open. Peasants were coming to and from the king’s residence as they pleased it seemed, but Eriibeus still wondered if he should ask to go inside.

He glanced around for someone who wasn’t occupied, finally laying eyes on a girl sitting by her lonesome under a tree in the courtyard lawns. He approached her. “Excuse me,” he began.

She looked up at him. She was not dressed as the rest of the peasantry. Her linen dress was loose and simple much like everyone else, but she wore a shawl of fur across her shoulders and a scratched gold ring on her middle finger, clearly worth more in sentiments than in monetary value. She cocked her head upon seeing a new face. “Yes?”

“Uh... I am Erii of Troverdon. I am here for an apprenticeship under Cleric Hal.”

She jumped to her feet which were garbed by worn leather boots, made for manual tasks such as working in the fields. “I am Yvaanell. The king is my father. I am heir to the throne here.” An honest smile happened across her face and she folded her hands over her lap.

Eriibeus was taken aback by her casual demeanor. The status of royalty meant nothing to him here, but he did expect someone like the princess herself to be a bit coarser about these things. “Oh, well, should I bow?” He was only half joking.

Yvaanell snorted a laugh. “Absolutely not! My father tells us all that such formalities are better suited for kings with portraits upon their walls.” She grinned, stepping closer to him. “You may come and go as you please. Our home is open to the public. I will show you inside and introduce you to my father.”

.X.

Orbital observation posts were always open for anyone to connect to. Those with niche interests in sociological subjects such as Eriibeus spent some of their free time tapping into these surveillance streams and simply watched as primitive peoples lived their lives. Kathria always questioned the ethics of these practices. She felt it all seemed rather exploitative, allowing citizens of space-faring civilizations like the Galactic Nation of Earth or the Phosnoi Technocracy to essentially spy on unwitting people, but the intention of these posts was ultimately to educate the public. Supposedly.

From the moment Eriibeus left the ship, Kathria was plagued with urges to keep watch of him by taking reins of one of the post’s cameras, just as he or his ilk may have watched a native under usual circumstances. The two of them had worked alongside each other for some time now, and she would trust the man with her life. However, there were still bits of her that struggled to fully accept his methods of approaching delicate situations, such as this mission he created for himself.

Two hours had finally passed since his departure, and with every second more, she acknowledged her apprehension was increasing in weight. Various scenarios of what could possibly go wrong played on a loop inside her head.

Anxiety eventually took over her judgement. She extended her left arm outwards at an acute angle, and the thin, flexible band worn around her wrist pulsed with two dull vibrations. Her HUD blinked to life: a hologram the size of a large textbook emanating from a square component of the band, detachable for charging and mounting to other devices. Modern personal HUD’s were ancestored by smart phones and tablets of the past millennia. Perhaps humankind’s most prolific invention, aside from the internet, of course.

Modern orbital surveillance satellites that were available to the public delivered imagery with resolutions by the millimeter, allowing for intense enhancement capabilities. Although it wasn’t possible to zoom in close enough from space to read someone’s lips on the surface of the planet, it was possible to see inside of windows or identify heads from top-down perspective. Military and state satellites were much more powerful than these ones. After a series of swipes and taps upon the hologram display, she did connect to one of the cameras and input the coordinates left behind by Eriibeus in the ‘Custom Coordinates’ application field.

“Forgive my lack of confidence in you, Eriibeus, but I know by now that your superior Phosnoi intellect is often hindered by your own ego.”

Passive observation posts of these sorts were mostly established by the xenophilic Thu’Xii State, the modern galaxy’s undisputed superpower. Once she connected, their country flag flickered fuschia-red over a black backdrop on her HUD before displaying a bird’s eye image of where Eriibeus began his trek, 5 miles outside of Okuil.

Kathria touched the screen and slowly pulled her fingers across to pan the camera’s image to the left. Upon the ground were digital tile quadrants and Thu’Xii numbers to label each one. The footage was clear and fluid aside from the occasional tearing. She followed the route he most likely did, along the only road, until she reached Okuil from five hundred feet overhead. She panned around, scoping out the village for someone who may tip her off as her associate and even exploring a bit for herself. It was impossible to determine which one of the moving scalps was Eriibeus, and perhaps that was good. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary. Not now, at least.

After several minutes of searching for anything and finding nothing, she forced herself to disconnect from the stream and lowered her arm which deactivated her HUD. She wished she could assure herself that her worries were not needed, but unfortunately for her she was not very naive. She truly did admire his passion for learning. His entire reason for offering to be her ship’s science officer was simply because he wished to be closer to the fronts of scientific discovery out here in space. Some days she chastised herself for not realizing what she had enlisted for when she accepted him aboard.

In an effort to take her mind off of matters, she elected to leave the control room finally and head to her quarters instead. Downtime between missions was meant to be used as a time of recuperation for the crew, and the captain should deserve some peace, as well. She was told by Eriibeus that he would return upon village curfew as he did not wish to sleep there, so he should never be in a condition where his guard has been compromised.

#scifi #science fiction #short story #aliens #Kathria #Eriibeus #medieval times #middle ages #future #futurism #wip

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