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blueikeproductions · 1 year ago

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I can tell you right now, if this actually happened it’d be suicide. This Chinese spin off couldn’t even get off the ground when Cyberverse was on, coupled with political tensions at the time, what makes you think this is gonna work now?

The Cyberverse toys barely sold as it was. They went to clearance immediately when it came out during Christmas, and Japan cancelled the line outright it did so poorly. Japanese stores were STILL clogged with unsold merchandise after the show ended in America!

So no, until Hasbro actually says so, I don’t believe for an instant they’d be THAT stupid to pseudo revive one of their worst selling toy lines to buy time for a post EarthSpark kids cartoon. They’d have better luck dubbing and repackaging Transformers Go!, the Braves meets Beast Hunters Prime continuation Japan got when Prime was cancelled down there.

I don’t think partnering with Nick or Cartoon Network matters anymore anyway. Nick is so neck deep in controversy it has fully become The Sponge Network: All SpongeBob, All The Time. Cartoon Network has nothing new except Ivandoe, which is just Gumball again like the incredibly short lived Elliot From Earth was, so that’s not helping. Tiny Toons Looniversity sure, but that’s on borrowed time, as that only appeals to Animation Twitter Stans and curious Millenials who grew up with Adventures, and the later has mostly abandoned it.

In my experience, modern kids hate most modern cartoons anyway and are either watching web shows, trendy anime or older cartoons like Tom & Jerry.

Transformers’ best bet now is becoming a Netflix series like Pokémon has become in the west. Paramount+ is a glass house waiting to crumble, that so far most rocks thrown at it have been terrible aims.

And as much as some don’t want to hear it, the best type of show Transformers can be now is pure anime like RiD01 & the Unicron Trilogy. Anime is bigger now than its original boom in the 90’s and 2000’s, and a new kid oriented toyetic Transformers anime is the best thing they can do now.

What that would be I don’t know beyond classic Autobots vs Decepticons with Optimus & Megatron as the hero & villain we know them to be, not shady moronic uncle and still somehow slightly racist but repentant great uncle they are in EarthSpark. (I’ve said once I’ll say it again, MEGATRON palling around with the lead black-Asian family is not the flex people think it is.)

I would also accept Autobots vs Terrorcons as the gimmick of a kids anime, but we need proper hero and villain characters again. Skybound is proving head over heels this is what people want.

If Hasbro has the audacity to revive Cyberverse and force what many outside China will probably think is Astro Boy in heelies, the series outside of Skybound will be even more worse off.

The only thing they can reasonably be tinkering with is a kids cartoon based on ONE, and that can either be telling the story of what happened after the Quintessons on Cybertron, or more likely, they’re on Earth with an original story about the Decepticons & Quintessons doing something, while Optimus and Elita tell vague stories to Spike (white), Carly (Asian), and Chip (black) about what happened on Cybertron relating to the problem of the day so as not to overshadow an eventual TFTWO. And best case scenario that won’t be ready until summer of next year at the earliest.

Bottom line: Cyberverse no, TFONE the Animated Series on Earth yes. Energon Universe anime is preferable but we’re not there yet.

#blueike productions #blueike #transformers #transformers one #maccadam #Youtube

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majachee · 1 year ago

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NO WAIT- A, B, C, D

Ships I like a lot: Swinlock, Jazzprowl, TFA Swinlockprowl, Raphmona, 87 Mikey/Kala/Mondo Gecko, Shadowpeach, mmm... Elliot and Leo from Pandora Hearts lmao.

A pairing that I hadn't considered until someone changed my mind? Swinlock, actually. Never crossed my mind until I saw ship art and I was like... woagh.

Ship I never liked and probably never will: I guess most Megatron ships...? Like. MegOP is funny but outside of that I don't... like... Megatron ships. He's just way too manipulative usually. Makes me uncomfortable.

Ship/pairing I wanted to like but can't: Rewind and Chromedone from Transformers. Like, YAY LOVE WINS! CANON GAY COUPLE! But Chromedome just sucks. And not in a fun way. He sucks in a very "I am reading very uncomfortable undertones from his actions and if I met anyone who related to him IRL I'd run" kind of way. He's like a Rick Sanchez to me.

If it helps, I like the other canonical gay TF romances cuz YAY !!!

#ask #ask game #anonymous #text #ramble #negative #kinda??? but like. no hate cuz i like art of these tf ships i dont like lmao its just a preference

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daisyachain · 4 years ago

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the semi-nonsexual throuple was a funny joke but I have to thank Caleb Gallo for giving me a way to describe the dynamic for when technically only two of three close friends are romantically involved, but you can't just separate them

#jolyne/ermes and F.F. or itadori/megumi and nobara or break/reim and sharon #elliot/leo and oz or cyclonus/tailgate and whirl or megatron/magnus and roddy or cdrw and bs…there are more than I remember #Kelsey rambles

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ambulance-mom · 3 years ago

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ooc I'm 22 i have a learning disability wich is actually as i found out a educational learning disability and a social learning disability

I'm open for mature people

I will do my best to trigger warn

No politics please

I am in my early twenties. I’m okay NSFW topics This includes violence, gore, etc. I understand I interact with minors, and I will do my best to not expose them to anything explicit

i live in the uk

i have adhd

i have been role-playing for four years

i have autism

i suffer from anxiety and depression so if i baddger you please don't block me it's just my emotions or if to the outside eye i seem toxic I'm not toxic i just have iffy social skills and dont pick up on cues well

I have no filter

I'm sorry I'm a burden

turns out i struggle with boundaries so please tell something if do wrong this goes for all my blogs and please be understanding

all blogs

no pedos

no homophobes

no creeps

my tf oc

Besties

@hells-greatestdad best Luci

@xdeerxhealerx best deer

@vintagemoss a moss that provides emotional support

I love you guys

Trauma's holoform by @tf-titania thank you!

Backstory

Trauma began life as a high caste medical trainee before the war and during the boiling point when it all went down the high council decided to bomb her clinic for disabled homeless younglings making a cover up saying they had destroyed abominations but trauma... out of her grief joined the decepticons to avenge her lost charges

during the middle of the war she saw a decepticon soldier kill a defensless autobot and then the truth came toppling on her she had then defected to become a neutral

She found a transport ship which over the years she's converted into a mobile home and clinic and she will sometimes make pitstops on earth to help out but will leave as soon as she's done to not get caught up in the war again

alternate tfp/rid2015

after the war she was granted amnesty and placed as the alchimores medic....

in beast wars she's a sweet predacon medical officer who transforms into a lioness

in the shattered glass universe she is insane off the walls and kidnaps younglings to "help" them being a mad medic

in generation 1 she's a apprentice of hook and sees the cons as a dysfunctional but lovable family

in animated she may be a former decepticon but trauma chooses to stay neutral and help orphan human children

In tf one she's the miners medic and she enjoys her job and sorta doubles as emotional support for them

in idw she was at the Delphi facility when pharma released the rust disease potentially putting her Life at risk and the false medic then shot her

In skybound she's a decepticon medic however she's disgusted with how they've turned out.... So she's in officially a neutral but she's what she calls an true decepticon against corruption

Character facts:

1: she may be polysexual

2: she can get a bit excited sometimes

3: she's good with kids

adoptive sire

@lobethemnemosurgeon

her kids

@hoshi-neko-hikari sweet lil angel

@chaoticxbeast - sai boy

@afroggycollective - sweet gal

@sonofshin dragon baby

Nyx is a considerably sweet mech he loves serving the femmes of Cybertron he works as a waiter

sideblogs

Transformers rp

@hobotron exiled Megatron rp blog

@wasp-not-crazy tfa wasp blog

Star wars rp

@last-domino -echo rp blog

@son-of-fett Boba rp blog

fnaf rp blogs

@bear-bitten evan afton rp blog

@golden5th - cassidy rp blog

@stringed-daughter puppet/Charlotte rp blog

@spring-trapp-ed Afton rp blog

dc blogs rp

@arkhambird -arkhamverse jason todd

MCU

@purple-surgicalborg - nebula

Hazbin verse rp blog

@damian-morningstar damian from bad luck jack and zoophobia headcanonn au rp blog

@the-bee-queen beeelzabub rp blog

disney rp blogs

@fallen-second-born - scar rp blog

murder drones blogs

@nate-doorman-elliot n rp blog

quarry rp blog

@silas-dogboy - silas vorez rp blog

paw patrol rp blog

@bella-the-medic-pup paw patrol oc rp blog

resi rp

@mould-girl Eveline rp blog

Poppy playtime rp blogs

@theokitty catnap au rp blog

@mommy-legs-long mommy long legs rp

Sonic rp

@shadow-robotnick shadow rp blog

Jurassic rp

@ripper-indoraptor indoraptor rp blog

Steven universe blogs

@trauma-starchild steven

@stretchy-therapist spinel

Doom rp

@rebirthed-scientist Olivia Pierce rp blog

#Spotify #SoundCloud

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megatron-fucks · 3 years ago

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so i was gonna do a thing in Lesser Evil where, after Megatron sabotaged Peaceful Cooperation Attempt #1, they tried again. Then I didn't do that.

But while I was planning that, I got really attached to the two human characters who appear in a single scene of Lesser Evil: Colonel Elliot and the foreman Ms. Bryant. Two tiny things I wrote for them for Peaceful Cooperation Attempt #2

(also Elliot and Bryant are lesbians. which was not something i ever intended to include in LE, but it's true in my heart.)

Set some time after Megatron kisses Optimus at the mine.

----

Optimus: You don't have any concerns about working with Megatron after, ah, what happened last time?

Elliot: If I weren't willing to work with men like him, I'd be out of a job. Frankly, I'm only surprised that he's stupid enough to do in public what most men of power learn to do in private.

---

Megatron was standing alone with the foreman, watching the work in the mine below, when she suddenly said, "So... do you fuck?"

Megatron hadn't heard the word used as a verb before. "What?"

"I had fifty bucks on you don't, on account of the whole robot thing," she said, including a broad gesture to his general frame as if that explained anything, "but apparently you kiss." Oh, that did rather clarify things. "So, do you fuck?"

He sighed. "Are you asking about Cybertronians in general, or me and Prime in particular?"

She turned suddenly, alarmingly red. "Oh my god no, sorry, shit. I didn't mean it like that! Fuck. I'm such a bad diplomat."

"You are," he agreed. He kept watching as the fins sticking out from under her hat turned bright red to match her face. Megatron associated that kind of rapid colour change with the freshly dead, but it didn't seem to be a medical emergency here.

#deleted scenes #lesser evil #i just realised I never posted this #which explains why i couldn't find it on my blog #the lesbians thing started bc i was like #'why would the same foreman be at this new mine?'#and the answer obviously is that she and the colonel are secretly seeing each other #and so the colonel requested her presence #ALSO - this will probably go on AO3 at some point #but i think it'll be after i publish Peace Is A Dead Rat

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britesparc · 4 years ago

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Weekend Top Ten #474

Top Ten Characters Who Came Back from the Dead

I am stunned – stunned! – that I’ve not done this one before. I mean, come on! It’s right there.

So there’s obviously a thematic resonance going on here. This weekend – the weekend you’re meant to be reading this – is famous where I come from because of a story where someone came back from the dead. Unlike other holidays – Christmas, Halloween, the release of a Star War – I’ve actually been a little slow off the mark in making lists that celebrate Easter. I’ve done eggs and bunnies, but incredibly I’ve never done resurrections, which really is the day’s whole deal. I mean, if you get down to brass tacks, it’s kinda the big selling point of the entire religion really. I hesitate to say “USP” because, well, it’s been done elsewhere, but it’s still supposed to be one of the big Christian takeaways (there’s definitely a chain of Christian takeaways in the States, isn’t there?).

Anyway, resurrection. It’s actually more common than you might think. Certainly in terms of comics there are probably more characters who’ve “died and come back” than have never “died” at all. But! And this is where I get pernickety. Most characters who “die” don’t actually die. Take Batman for instance: he’s shot in the face by Darkseid, and then Superman ups and finds his charred corpse, but – shocker! – he’s not actually dead, he was just sent back in time, where he Quantum Leaps his way back to the present day, accumulating enough Omega Energy with each leap that by the time he reaches the present day he’s blow a hole in reality. Or something, I’ve not read that story for quite a few years. Anyway: he wasn’t dead. Neither was Sherlock Holmes, or for that matter Dirty Den. Generally speaking, if someone dies in a story and then reappears, they’re not dead. Not really.

So this list here is supposed to be people who actually died. Now, even here, it’s debatable; I mean, is E.T. dead, or does his body just go into some kind of hibernation? If Optimus Prime’s brainwaves survive, does he ever really die? Is a clone someone coming back to life or not? It’s all a bit wishy-washy really, which kind of makes sense when you’re talking about resurrection. And let’s not get onto the chief resurrector, the Doctor; do they die every time they regenerate? Or is the regeneration itself a way of staving off death? When David Tennant turned into Matt Smith, did the Tennant-Doctor die? “I don’t want to go,” and all that; there’s always a subtle (or not-so-subtle) change in personality. Does that count? Well, for the purposes of this list, I’ve kinda decided it doesn’t. But it’s an interesting discussion to have, if you’re a big old nerd like me.

So yeah: people who have died – properly, I suppose – and then come back to life. That’s the list. No fakery, to mistaken identity, no alternate universe shenanigans; they were dead but they got better (no Chev Chelios either; sorry, Stath stans). No zombies either! Or vampires! They’re not undead; they were dead, and now they’re alive again. That’s the rule. Also I’ve seriously tried to limit comic book characters. And I’m sure there are some big omissions (like, I know there’s one from Game of Thrones that’s not on here, but that’s because I’ve not seen that far into the show yet; I know, I know). But I reckon these are the best at being back.

Optimus Prime (Transformers franchise, from about 1987): OP is the OG when it comes to coming back to life. Dying and then stopping being dead is pretty much his thing. Technically the first time he came back from the dead was in the original animation; famously being offed by Megatron in The Transformers: The Movie (1986), he came back to life a year later. Subsequent media have frequently killed him and brought him back, even in the live-action movies, but I want to talk about the comics. Because the original Marvel run killed off Optimus at a similar time as the cartoon; he’s blown up in slightly contrived circumstances, but his brain is saved on a floppy disk. Two years later he has his body rebuilt and his brain restored and he’s off to the races once more. Then in 1991, when facing down planet-eating mega-bastard Unicron, he sacrifices himself again, but this time his personality has begun to merge with that of his ostensibly-human companion Hi-Q. Hi-Q/Prime is converted/rebuilt into a new body, and he wins the war. So there you go: even in this one sliver of continued continuity – not including off-shoots or spin-offs, let alone other iterations of the overall franchise – Optimus Prime died and came back to life twice. Beat that, Easter.

E.T. (E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial, 1982): not much to say here that we don’t already know from the Book of Spielberg. E.T., doddery little alien magic-man, grows sicker and sicker as he’s stuck on Earth, until in a thrillingly-edited set-piece he seems to expire, human doctors unable to help him. “I know you’re gone,” says best bud Elliot, “because I don’t know what to feel.” But then! His heart glows! His colour returns! And he positively yells, “E.T. phone hooooooome!” – and Elliot’s euphoric laugh is just devastating. The whole sequence – what is it, ten minutes? Fifteen? – is masterful in every way, from the technical to the performative to the emotional. Bloody magic is what it is.

Gandalf (The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers, 1954): Gandalf the Grey famously leads the Fellowship of the Ring across the Bridge of Khazad-dûm, where he faces off against a Balrog. After a bit of “you shall not pass” and all that, they both fall from the bridge, battling each other on the way down, before both perishing at the bottom. Gandalf, though, is not really Gandalf, but Olórin, one of the Maiar – basically a kind of angel, I guess. He is returned to Earth by the powers-that-be to complete his mission, and is promoted to Gandalf the White, supplanting the corrupt wizard Saruman. This new iteration of Gandalf is a bit more serious and steadfast, although he does retain his fascination with hobbits. Regardless, he gets a terrific death scene and a triumphant resurrection, and how it ties into Tolkien’s wider mythology is interesting.

Superman (DC Comics, 1993): comic book characters die and come back all the time; it’s pretty much a staple of the medium. I guess Jean Grey/Phoenix is probably the most famous, but they’ve all done at some point (even if, like in my Batman example earlier, sometimes they don’t actually die). Anyway, Superman died, very famously, after getting into a tremendous barney with genetically-engineered super-git Doomsday (as famously, and atrociously, depicted in Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice). The whole “Death of Superman” arc is interesting and entertaining as an example of mid-nineties big-panel EXTREME storytelling: as the issues tick down to the fateful scrap in Metropolis, the number of panels-per-page is reduced until the final issue is basically just full of splash pages. It’s a terrific, exhilarating rumble, really selling the heft of the confrontation. Interestingly, the comic spends a lot of time afterwards dealing with life without Superman, as a raft of imitators/wannabe successors emerge from the woodwork; these include the best-ever Superboy, Conner Kent, and Steel, who’s basically Superman meets Iron Man. Eventually, of course, Superman comes back, his body essentially having been sent to a Kryptonian day spa to recuperate; he emerges clad in black and with a mullet, so death obviously has some lasting repercussions. Overall, it’s a whopping arc with long-term consequences, and whilst it’s easy to make Christ parallels when discussing Superman, this story doesn’t really hew that way (unlike the Snyder-verse which really goes all-in on that plot point, much to the films’ detriment). One of the better aspects is how, even in death, Superman is an inspiration, which in itself has a long trail; leading, eventually, to Batman’s famous withering diss, “the last time you inspired someone was when you where dead.” Anyway, I’ve gone on about this far too long.

Spock (Star Trek III: The Search for Spock, 1984): let’s start by acknowledging just how great Spock’s death is in Wrath of Khan. As a plot point within the film, as a piece of staging and performance, and as a landmark moment in this franchise, it was seminal; a death for the ages (as an aside, it’s crazy to think Star Trek as a whole was only sixteen years old when Spock died; the MCU was eleven when Tony Stark clicked the bucket). Anyway, they built an entire film around how to bring him back, and Spock as we know him is absent for much of it; a presence looming over everything as he rapidly ages, going through his Vulcan super-puberty and everything. It’s actually a rather sombre film as Kirk’s son is killed and the Enterprise blows up; bringing back Spock comes with a very real cost. Trek III is not one of the top-tier films – in the loose trilogy that comprises Khan, Spock, and The Voyage Home it’s certainly the weakest – but it’s still pretty good, often underrated. And, of course, it brings back Spock, which is nice.

Agent Coulson (Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D., 2013): Coulson’s death in Avengers comes as a huge shock, one of the fan-favourite characters being brutally offed in surprising fashion. In a film chock full of super-people, it’s the ordinary guy who buys it tragically. However, did any of us really think he was dead-dead? And so barely a year later he pops back up in the TV series Agents of SHIELD. However, his reincarnation became a recurring plot point; his references to spending time in Tahiti (“It’s a magical place”) becoming increasingly sinister as we come to understand even he doesn’t know how he’s back up and running. The eventual truth – Nick Fury using painful and transformative alien tech to basically bring Coulson back to life – may be a bit underwhelming, but it gave Clark Gregg a lot of meat to chew on dramatically speaking, and it underscored a lot of his character development going forward (especially when he, yes, died again, and then sort-of came back, twice).

Buffy Summers (Buffy the Vampire Slayer, 2001): full disclosure: I never watched Buffy religiously. I think I just missed it at the start and it was only when all my friends were talking about how great it was that I started tuning in more regularly. Weirdly, I think the most I watched it was around the time Buffy died and came back. It’s fascinating, really, and full credit to the show for the way they explored it; in a series full of magic, the afterlife, and the undead, bringing a character back to life isn’t too shocking. Willow, Buffy’s witchy mate, resurrects her with magic; but in an excellent twist, it turns out that she was in Heaven, and is super pissed off to be pulled out of paradise and stuck back on Earth, leading to her feeling depressed and alienated all season. That’s a great hook for bringing a character back, and leads to some meaty stuff for Sarah Michelle Geller to do.

Agent Smith (The Matrix Reloaded, 2003): do you ever feel that The Matrix has slipped from popular culture a little bit? Twenty years ago it was ascendent, rivalling Lord of the Rings for the title of “the new Star Wars”. Everyone was copying it. but now hardly anyone talks about it. probably because it hasn’t had a multimedia shelf-life comprising dozens of games and spin-off shows. Maybe the new film will change that. But I digress; Hugo Weaving is tremendous as Agent Smith in the first film, and is exploded at the end (spoilers) by Keanu Reeves’ Neo. Unsurprisingly – especially as he’s, well, just bits of code – he’s back in the sequel. However, he’s now been corrupted; he becomes, basically, a virus, self-replicating and threatening not just our heroes but the Matrix itself. This builds across two films, as Neo has to fight dozens of Smiths in the famous “Burly Brawl”, before the final conflict in The Matrix Revolutions when it seems everyone in the program has been Smithed. It offers Weaving a lot of scenery to chew on and makes for some great set-piece battles, even if the films themselves are a little disappointing.

Olaf (Frozen II, 2019): let’s not beat around the bush here – Olaf carks it in Frozen II. Okay, maybe Elsa dies; maybe Anna dies in the first film. They’re frozen, right, but I feel like it’s “magic ice” and there’s something going on there. Do they come back to life or were they ever really dead? Anyway, Elsa is effectively “gone” but we get a protracted death scene for the comic relief talking snowman. He literally fades away, slowly dying in Anna’s arms, and melts into a flurry of snow that blows away. People talk about Bambi’s mum all the time, but mark my words; “Olaf’s death” is going to be cited as a major traumatic incident for twenty-year-olds in 2030. His resurrection, truth be told, is slightly less great, Elsa just straight-up bringing him back to life, reminding us that “water has memory” to let us know that it’s the same Olaf and he remembers everything (including, presumably, dying? That’s creepy). And that, to be honest, is where I draw the line; sentient wind and rock monsters I can handle, but we all know homeopathy is bollocks.

Emperor Palpatine (Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker, 2019): look, I hate this. But let’s deal with it anyway, because I have a funny feeling it’s going to lead to some quite interesting stories being told in spin-off Star Wars fiction. I personally feel quite strongly that Palpatine should have stayed dead. And maybe he did? We are led to believe that the Palpatine we see in Rise is a clone; there are jars of stilted Snokes floating in the background. He’s all knackered and broken, eyes blackened and fingers dropping off; clearly he’s not well. So is he really the same character at all? Is his Sith essence somehow fed into this new body, the way Prime’s mind is downloaded from a floppy disk (“run prime.exe”)? Let’s say it counts, let’s say he’s the same slimy Palps we know and love. He is, at least, a sinister presence, and like I say, the whys and wherefores of how he came to be back is quite interesting. There’s a fascinating story to be told about the rise of Snoke and the seduction of Ben Solo – a more interesting story than anything told in The Rise of Skywalker, for starters. Moff Gideon in The Mandalorian seems to be researching cloning and seeks to extract midichlorians from a Force-sensitive being; are we to conclude that this in service of making a new body for the Emperor? All this – stuff hinted at but not explored in the film itself – is, like I say, interesting if not outright fascinating. And I agree, there is a certain degree of circularity in bringing back the series’ Big Bad for the final instalment. But I still feel, hand on heart, that it undoes a lot of the victory of Return of the Jedi (as did The Force Awakens, if I’m honest), as well as throwing away all the development of Rey and Kylo in The Last Jedi. So: Palpatine is cool, his presence and backstory in Rise of Skywalker is suitably creepy and interesting, but on the whole it’s crap and they shouldn’t have brought him back. The end.

Ten people who definitely died and definitely un-died! What could be more Easter-y? Honourable mention goes to the episode of Red Dwarf where Rimmer changes history and ends up not being a hologram, only to accidentally blow himself up in the final seconds.

#top ten #dead characters #alive characters #easter #back from the dead #resurrection

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steelthroat · 1 year ago

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First page down. One panel or two left but that's the next page. Now I'm going to sleep because I'm practically dead.

I JUST DREW ON THE WRONG LAYER WTF.THE MEMES ARE REAL NOOOOOOO

#i kind of gave up in the third panel but i cannot keep my eyes open #anyway that's a decent result #i just have to train my hands not to shake every time they touch the drawing tablet #and treat it differently than i would a traditional drawing #also I'm slooooooow #aaaaaaaargh #btw elliot #i mean megatron #is not pleased #art of steel

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thaumaturtles · 6 years ago

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Begin ANGELQUEST

The other day, I was doing some.......

...... studying.......

When I came across an advertisement. This isn’t at all an unusual experience; I’ve been on the internet for a decade and change and I’ve come to accept that ads are a part of the experience. This was an ad I’d seen many times before, too. I’m so accustomed to seeing it that my eyes often skip right over it. However, I’ve been reading a lot of articles about Enlightenment, lately, and I’ve been trying to put that into practice in my everyday life. I’ve been attempting, to varying degrees of success, to become more aware of myself and my environment, to probe onward into my mind’s own blind spots. In short, I’m trying to blitz my chakras. (Don’t worry, am Indian, can reclaim.)

And so, for perhaps the first time, I took a moment to truly see the ad in front of me. To stop and smell the dogshit hiding behind the roses. And, goodness, was it a sight to behold. Ladies, gentlemen, and all who fall betwixt, I present to you, THIS:

Take a moment, if necessary, to take it all in.

Have you collected yourself? Good. You’re holding up the rest of the class.

I don’t know how I’ve managed to let this pass without mental comment on more than one occasion. How did I look at this image, think “angel reading? yeah, sure, that’s a thing that exists” and then shuffle along? The only explanation I can muster is Divine intervention, which would ironically lend this product some legitimacy. I need to understand. What does Angel Reading mean? How could such a process be personalized, and, furthermore, how could it take place over the Internet? Who is this “Celeste”? What is she after? Why does she look vaguely disappointed in me? Can she see my soul? What is an “Angelic Medium”?????

Clearly, if I want answers, I’m going to have to dive in. I place my Crocodile Dundee hat on my head with no small measure of trepidation, though I must confess a moiety of excitement deep within. As I hike up my Adventurin’ Shorts and stuff a few hundred metres of rope into my backpack, I consider the long road ahead. And then, with my cosplay explorer’s outfit put on to my approval, I sit down at my computer. I’m really not sure why I felt the need to do all that when I’m just gonna be here at home.

I steel my will, and I click.

This loading screen appears, and I’d like to mention that the URL for this page is perhaps longer than any URL I’ve ever seen before in my 16 years.

Okay, let’s just take a moment to get our bearings here and-

HOLY MACKEREL, THERE’S A COUNTDOWN!

And only twenty-seven minutes left! Sakes alive, I clicked this link just in time! Imagine If I’d wasted more time farting around and dressing up like Indiana Jones!

Although, weirdly enough, whenever I refresh the page, the timer restarts, and it always restarts at 27 minutes and 50ish seconds, which is a random-enough number to seem legitimate.

Hmm. Odd.

I wonder if maybe the countdown isn’t actually real and is just there to pressure you into typing your info more quickly so you don’t notice how fishy this whole opera-

OH MY GOD ONLY 26 MINUTES!!!!!!!

OK, gotta think quickly here. Gosh, they’re asking some personal questions right off the bat, but I can’t let them know it’s me; they might recognize me from tumblr. If this sting operation’s gonna go forth I gotta lie my ass off. My name? Uh, uh.. My name is Dyl-Dy- Uhhhh, shit, okay, it’s Dylan-NO, Dylllllllll...... Delilah? Delilah. Like from the Bible. Yeah, that’s fitting, especially since I’m swindling these fools. Soon, Celeste, your hair will be mine.

They’re asking for my date of birth, which I’m hesitant to put because my 16th birthday party was kind of a big deal and Celeste might’ve heard about it, in which case she’ll know it’s me AND things will be super awkward cause I didn’t invite her to the party.

I put 4/13/1969 obviously

They’re also asking for my e-mail address, which I can’t give out because it has my full name, address, and social security number in it, so let’s just pull this ripcord real quick and parachute out of this nightmare zone, and over to a quick, free, secure e-mail client. That is, protonmail.com, which is not my usual e-mail server and will thus throw Celeste’s goons even farther off my trail

Wow, that was a surprisingly quick and painless process! I might just have to use protonmail in the future

So anyway here’s my info, sent in right under the wire, with a mere 24.3 minutes left! God that was close. Picture that classic scene in Indiana Jones where he slides under the door and then reaches back in to get his hat, only it’s an out-of-shape teen and also the door hasn’t even started closing yet.

I went with my actual country because, c’mon, there’re a lot of people in Jamaica. Statistically speaking, how likely is it they’d find me through that?

You know I didn’t. You know I fucking didn’t. Why are you asking.

Also, here’s a quick rundown of what Celeste is actually offering in case anyone was curious. It does somewhat tickle me that she claims she’ll “get to work immediately” as soon as anyone clicks the link and subscribes, as though the process isn’t completely automated. It evokes a clear image of Celeste, in full angelic garb, sitting at a computer screen and answering calls while also typing into three discrete keyboards simultaneously.

The idea that she could personally take the order of every individual who clicks this ad betrays either a complete lack of confidence in the desirability of her product, or an incredible amount of confidence in her own ability to multitask.

Who is “she”? Celeste? That doesn’t make much sense in the context here. Peter’s Guardian Angel? But earlier Celeste made it sound like all angels use he/him! Also, what does “bring her back” mean if it’s the angel? Can angels leave and later be found again? I feel like if you find your guardian angel once, that should be it forever, but apparently they can leave and you have to ensnare them again?????

Hooray! A link from an unknown source to an unknown destination! I sure can’t wait to click it all day long!

The things I do in the name of science, I swear to God Celeste.

It took a minute but here it is. Sidenote: I rather enjoy the irony of an inbox which consists of three e-mails about encryption and ways to curate a safe internet experience, and one which is an automated link from a bullshit ad for a product that doesn’t exist. There’s a subtle poetry to this image. I almost want to frame it, and then sell it for an exorbitant amount of money.

Here’s the e-mail, folx. If ever you needed proof that this was a scam, look no further.

Who on this good green earth would think beginning such a missive with, “Thank you for your trust,” would be a good way to garner MORE goodwill? When I go to my local grocer and I purchase a party-sized bag of Tostitos to eat by myself over the course of a day and a half because I’m in control of my body, goddammit, the bag doesn’t say, “Thank you for believing in us! We promise we won’t give you dysentery!

Like, what the fuck? “Thank you for your trust.” Your product should be able to stand on its own two feet and proudly proclaim, “I’m gonna give you a fucking angel reading or die trying!”

That initial line has honestly made me more scared than ever for this process. I’m confident I’m going to click that link and it’s going to auto-download a terabyte of obscure Norwegian pornography to my hard drive. I did just update my computer this morning, however, and all my data are backed up, so I feel somewhat more secure than I might otherwise.

Did I really just say “data are”? I know it’s grammatically correct and all, but it’s still jarring to hear. Messes with my mental flow. And wouldn’t the proper, descriptivist thing to do be to use “data is” to avoid confusion? Using “data are” feels clunky, is more difficult to say, and makes me look a bit snobbish. I’d delete it but that would require hitting the backspace button on my computer and I’m frankly quite lazy about that sort of thing. What was I talking about again? Oh, right. I have to click the link.

Again with the “thank you for your trust” bullshit! Whatever, I’m going to let it pass. They’re clearly going for a friendly, approachable persona here, even if they’re doing it in the most threatening, ass-backwards way possible.

This next email took a seemingly endless eight minutes to arrive, during which time I meditated, raised a bonsai tree to adulthood, watched Marley & Me, grappled with intense feelings of loneliness, and worked on some of my homework.

Or maybe I just played games on my phone. You decide!

Okay, not quite what “hereby” means, but sure. It’s a common mistake, likely exacerbated by the presence of the word “here” within “hereby.” Sort of a “wherefore does not mean where” situation I suppose.

Anyway, I’m submitting to the mortifying ordeal of clicking the link yet again.

Christ get a load of this shit. How fitting that the Angelic stone for someone born on 4/13 would be Jade. My archangel is Megatron apparently??? His info claims he’s some sort of scribe. My major planet is Neptune, and my secondary planet is.... the sun? Is anyone going to tell Celeste what stars are or do I have to do everything myself around here? I do like that ram up in the top left though. I’m naming you Ram Elliot.

Now for the pièce de résistance. Meet Mahasiah. Mahasiah is not my guardian angel; Mahasiah is the guardian angel for anyone born between April 10th-14th. My guardian angel is Yerathel, apparently. A few things I learned while researching this: both Mahasia and Yerathel have “feminine energies” (???) and both have Fire as their associated classical element. Also, Yerathel rules over Intelligence, which is one thing I actually somewhat like about myself. This is actually kind of neat to learn about!

I mean come on. That’s pretty fuckin cool. His name means “He Who Punishes Evildoers” which is beyond epic, and his associated gem is Smoky Quartz, aka the only Steven Universe character.

You know, maybe this whole Angel Reading business isn’t a scam after all. Maybe it’s a perfectly safe process and I’ll be totally fine, what am I worrying about? At the very least, it couldn’t hurt to explore her site a bit more..... for research’s sake.

yeah baby tell me more

certainly, miss celeste, anything for you

wait, aren’t I already in a relationshi-

JAZZERCISING JUNIPERS BATMAN THERE’S ONLY 28 MINUTES LEFT

holy shit! I want accurate readings!

Oh god oh no okay i’ll do whatever you want celeste please don’t leave me i need my tarots

THEY KNOW ABOUT ME ALREADY OMG

Well, okay, even in my currently addled state I can still see that “Duo-Telepathy” is complete bullshi-

OH WELL IF AMANDA GAVE THEM THREE WHOLE STARS I HAVE TO TRUST IT

Amazingly, my info was pre-filled in. Almost like this site is linked to Celeste’s in some way, or perhaps even run by the same group of scammeUPSTANDING CITIZENS IS WHAT I MEANT TO SAY

Ooh, another e-transmission from my good friend Celeste! Oh, how I’ve missed her! And apparently large and surprising discoveries have been made concerning me! She’s presenting me a Guide? I sure hope I’ll be able to open it, hassle-free, with no additional purchases/information required!

OHOHOHOHO

bro i’m shitting my drawers rn

I have no fucking clue what that means but you said FREE so i’m in!

oh my god there’s still so much left. just shut the fuck up and take my money you fools

AW TITS YEAH

....i think

Okay, I know the original thing said FREE and I should be “mad” or watever, but look at that bargain! that’s more than half off! It might as well be free! I’d be stupid NOT to buy it!

I’ve invented a lot of secondary information for Delilah. The phone number is merely (559) YOU-SUCK, as a subtle way of establishing the power dynamic at play here. I’m sure Celeste will appreciate it.

Hmmmmm.............. It would seem my method of “just input numbers randomly” won’t work here. Such a shame. Credit card fraud used to be so easy. I’ll have to put that on the backburner, though, because look what just appeared in my inbox!

You can see where this is going.

I’ll take my leave now, this post is getting long enough as is, but I do feel it’s important to note that doing a quick bit of research shows that Celeste & co. are famous for emotional manipulation, as well as getting people addicted to their products and forcing a sort of dependency upon them. It’s important to do your research, and remember basic internet safety tips like don’t click popups or check if a site is legit before downloading from them. It’s incredibly easy to get trapped down this sort of rabbit hole, where you wind up buying more and more of their products like you’re stockpiling for the Rapture. Not me, though, I’m obviously fine and can quit anytime I like. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go try a bunch of credit card numbers until one works.

#dylan talks #angelquest #long post #why do i keep making these #also yes this post was inspired by 'come with me on a magical journey through the internet' and 'an offer you cant refuse'#what about it

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fancoloredglasses · 5 years ago

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Transformers: the Movie (a far cry better than anything Michael Bay produced...)

youtube

(Thanks to TF Raw!! Transformers Multimedia Archive)

[All images are owned by Marvel Entertainment, Sunbow Productions, and Hasbro. I promise, I’m too small a fish to sue...]

in 1986, Hasbro had a whole new line of Transformers toys to unleash on kids (as well as a few of the “Generation 1″ toys they wanted to retire), and wanted the promotional materials animated series to reflect these changes. But how could they make these sweeping changes without upsetting the kids overly much? Kill ‘em all off on the big screen, of course!

The producers spared no expense in getting top-tier voice talent for their new characters. Too bad they would have to find new actors for the actual series.

On the Autobots’ side, we have the following new soldiers...

First, we have Hot Rod (voiced by “Brat Pack” alum Judd Nelson), along with Spike’s son Daniel (I guess I should mention that the movie takes place in 2005...20 years after the Generation 1 series...and yes, there will be jokes about how all this happened 15 years ago). It should be pretty obvious what he transforms into

His mentor of sorts is Kup (voiced by Lionel Stander, best known as Max the butler in Hart to Hart) a grizzled veteran who transforms into a pickup

Next we have Blurr, a race car who moves so fast the animators leave shadows of his movements behind him and talks like he’s trying to read drug side effects in less than 5 seconds.

Next up is Arcee, a female Autobot who was created to be comparable with Hot Rod (don’t ask me. Maybe Hasbro wanted to get the girl demographic? Though my wife had several Transformers toys (none of which were “female”) when she was a girl, so...)

Springer is Arcee’s partner through most of the movie. He’s a “triple changer” (similar to the Decepticons’ Blitzwing and Astrotrain) that transforms into a helicopter and an armored car.

And then there’s Ultra Magnus (voiced by Robert Stack, known for playing Elliot Ness in The Untouchables TV series and hosting Unsolved Mysteries) who commands Autobot operations on Earth (Optimus Prime and most of the core Autobots have moved to Cybertron’s moon, presumably to limit the loss of human lives in their conflict) He transforms into a tractor-trailer similar to Optimus.

We’ll get to the rest of the Autobots and the new Decepticons a bit later. I am going to assume that everyone knows who the majority of the Generation 1 Transformers are (or else this is going to be twice as long as it should be) If you’re not, do a quick Google search. I’ll wait.

For now, let’s talk about the “most incredible Rock & Roll” the above trailer mentioned. It’s mostly performed by Stan Bush and Vince DiCola, who are primarily known for (surprise) rock tracks for movie soundtracks (most notably Kickboxer and Rocky IV), with the rest being performed by low-budget rock bands who pretty much just needed a payday...with one notable exception we’ll get to later.

For now, let’s go to deep space where the Death Star a large metal sphere approaches a planet that is populated by robotic beings. Suddenly...

...it destroys the planet and its inhabitants (after they identify it as Unicron), mining their resources from the rubble (wonder if that’s why there was no GoBots movie) as the opening credits roll...

We come back from the credits to see Lazerbeak listening in on a conversation between Optimus Prime and Ironhide. Prime has ordered Ironhide to take a crew back to Earth to get energon from Autobot City (apparently the humans trust the Autobots enough to let them build a more permanent base on the planet. I think I remember CNN saying something about that...) Ironhide selects Ratchet, Prowl, and Brawn to help him man the shuttle as Lazerbeak reports back to Soundwave, who plays the conversation for Megatron.

As the shuttle makes it’s way to Earth...

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(Thanks to Elite Prime)

...we see more death than in the entire G1 series, and we’re not even 15 minutes into the film!

Back on Earth, Rot Rod and Daniel are fishing, and Hot Rod is awfully proud of the huge fish he caught...

...when they receive word that the shuttle from Cybertron is on approach, so they head off to watch. Hot Rod is less than impressed, but takes Daniel to watch from a great vantage point. Daniel notices the gaping hole in the shuttle, to which Hot Rod sees Starscream inside and opens fire, blowing the Decepticons’ cover, (great job, Starscream...) so they say to hell with stealth and begin their assault.

Blitzwing is about to turn Hot Rod into scrap when Kup arrives to save his shiny metal kiester, deflecting Blitzwing’s attack to severely damaging the Insecticon leader Shrapnel. The three (don’t forget Daniel!) then race to Autobot City to help defend it against Magatron’s forces.

Meanwhile, back at Autobot City...

...Perceptor (Why is there an Autobot who transforms into a giant microscope? I dunno, why are there Decepticons who transform into guns and boom boxes?) takes a tactical assessment of Megatron’s forces and reports that the Autobots are screwed. Ultra Magnus orders high alert and tells his forces to close up Autobot City.

Springer and Arcee seal up the city just as Megatron’s forces arrive, but the rest of the Insecticons start literally chewing through their defenses...

Kup and Hot Rod run over the Insecticons to get inside Autobot City through the hole they made (thanks, bug-bots!)

Perceptor finds Blaster (the Autobot version of Soundwave...guess the Autobots needed their own boom box) to get a message to Optimus Prime, but Soundwave sends his entire cassette brigade to destroy the transmitter. What happens next is one of the smallest melees around as Soundwave’s cassettes and Blaster’s go after each other.

Then things go bad to worse, because the Constructicons are part of Megatron’s forces, and you know what that means...

...they merge into Devastator! (without the huge metal scrotum Michael Bay’s version had) You know, I always wondered about the Transformers that merged into giant (or giant-er) robots. Are their consciousnesses suppressed by the giant robot? Is a combination of the individuals? Am I overthinking a kids’ cartoon from the 80s? What was I talking about? Oh yeah, the Autobots are screwed.

Devastator makes short work of Autobot City’s defenses, taking out several G1 transformers in the process (guess we know what voice actors wanted to renegotiate their contracts...) However, The Decepticons take their share of casualties as well.

They fight through the night, until...

...Autobot City is a smouldering ruin with only a handful of surviving Autobots (all the G2 ones, ironically)

Just as all seems lost, a shuttle from Cybertron appears, carrying Optimus Prime and reinforcements...

...including Grimlock and the Dinobots (who, in my opinion, are the more woefully underused of the G1 Autobots), who keep Devastator occupied while the rest of the Autobots deal with the bulk of Megatron’s forces.

Speaking of, Optimus Prime vows to finish off Megatron if it’s the last thing he does and charges into the fray.

Optimus single-handedly takes down the majority of Megatron’s forces until Megatron has to step in (to be fair, unlike Cobra Commander and a lot of this era’s main villains, Megatron has no issue leading the charge and sharing the risk)

After a hard-fought melee, Prime has Megatron dead to right and is about to deliver the killing blow when Hot Rod shows up to help and winds up distracting Optimus, giving Megatron the opening he needs...

...mortally wounding Optimus! However, instead of finishing him off, Megatron takes a moment to gloat, and Optimus is able to land one final blow, gravely wounding Megatron. Starscream sees this as an opportunity to retreat from a very costly battle, loading all surviving Decepticons (including Megatron) into Astrotrain and fleeing Autobot City.

In Autobot City’s medical (repair?) bay, the surviving Autobots could do little but look on as their leader, Optimus Prime, is damaged too badly to repair. Before he shuts down for the last time, he passes the Matrix of Leadership (an artifact so important that we’re just now finding out about it) to Ultra Magnus, stating that one day, an Autobot will rise from their ranks and light their darkest hour.

Meanwhile, Astrotrain reports that he doesn’t have the energon to make it to Cybertron unless his passengers lighten the load. the Constructicons suggest ejecting the wounded. The wounded object, but what are they gonna do about it. So it’s with a heavy heard (HA!) that Starscream tosses Megatrom into the vacuum of space (along withn the Insecticons and most of the Decepticon jets)

Naturally, Starscream nominates himself as the new leader of the Decepticons. Everyone else disagrees (and nominates themselves) Cue brawl as poor Astrotrain contemplates ejecting everyone else before they trash him.

As the ejected Decepticons float through space, they are found by Unicron (who we discover is voiced by Citizen Kane himself, Orson Wells) who offers to rebuild and upgrade them in exchange for destroying the Matrix of Leadership.

Megatron is transformed into Galvatron (voiced by Mr. Spock himself, Leonard Nimoy)

The Insecticons are transformed into the Sweeps, commanded by Scourge

The jets are transformed into...sleeker Decepticon jets, commanded by Cyclonus. The group set course for Cybertron...

...where it appears Starsceam somehow won the brawl ($10 says he hid in the corner until everyone else was exhausted) and has taken leadership, and has not let it go to his cranial unit at all...

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(thanks to OptimalOptimus2)

...until Galvatron takes control of the Decepticons back.

So after all that, we have several Autobots dead and a net Decepticon loss of...one.

At that point, Unicron shows up and destroys Cybertron’s moons (and the Autobot bases on them), consuming Jazz and Cliffjumper on the first moon. However, this gives the second moon enough time for Bumblebee and Spike to get away...for about 10 seconds before they too are consumed. Galvatron throws a fit until Unicron reminds him who’s really in charge. He then rallies the Decpticons to leave for Earth to destroy Ultra Magnus

Ultra Magnus orders the Autobots to the shuttles to stop Unicron, and that’s when the Decepticons attack (you know, they get between Earth and Cybertron fairly quickly. Exactly how far is Cybertron from Earth?

Kup, Hot Rod, and the Dinobots board one shuttle while Blurr, Perceptor, Blaster, Arcee, Springer, Daniel, and Ultra Magnus board the other (wait, is that all of the surviving Autobots? Why is Galvatron having such a tough time killing them off?) Unfortunately, Galvatron catches up and shoots down Kup’s shuttle! The shuttle crash lands on another cybernetic planet.

Then Galvatron’s forces zero in on Ultra Magnus’s shuttle. Mugnus separates the nose of the shuttle (which (I hope) had all the Autobots in it) from the body, leaving it to be destroyed by Galvatron while they escape unnoticed. Peceptor reports that the planet of Junk (yet another cybernetic planet. How many of these things are there?) is nearby so they can land and make repairs.

Unfortunately, Unicron isn’t so easily fooled and summons Galvatron back to deal with his failure.

Meanwhile, the planet Kup’s team crashed on seems to be inhabited by...

...robotic piranhas?! Hot Rod is tangled in...robotic seaweed?! You know, I’m sure there are organic things out in space as well... Anyway, the robotic piranhas home in of a helpless Hot Rod as he calls for help. Hot Rod eventually cuts himself free before suffering too much damage, then hears Kup call for help.

Hot Rod races to his mentor’s aid to see Kup being held by...

...a robotic squid?! COME ON!

Hot Rod manages to damage it enough that it retreats (with a cloud of ink... naturally) and checks on Kup...

who is not doing well, but can be repaired.

Meanwhile, on the planet of Junk, Magnus makes a rather rough landing, but everyone is intact. The team go out to attempt repairs when...

Robots emerge from under the junk and look on with their leader, Wreck-Gar (voiced by Monty Python alum Eric Idle)

Back on the other cybernetic planet, Hot Rod finished repairing Kup and the pair begin searching for the Dinobots when they are confronted by a horde of robots that emerge from the water. Kup tries diplomacy, Unfortunately...

...they swarm the pair and take them away.

A small robot looks on and transforms into a car (so he’s a lost Autobot?) and rolls away.

The...robotic crocogators? lead them to a chamber where a hearing of sorts is happening. Unfortunately, the accused is judged negatively and is fed to a horde of robots known as Sharkticicons, (were the writers (or toy designers) even trying by this point?)

Kup and Hot Rod are thrown into a cell where they meet the last survivor of the cybernetic planet from the beginning of the film, who tells them about Unicron just before he is taken to feed the Sharkticons for judgement.

Elsewhere on the planet, the Dinobots are searching for Kup and Hot Rod (between brawls among themselves; I swear, these guys got dumber since their time in the G1 series. They used to be primitive, but intelligent) Then the lost Autobot (who identifies himself as Wheelie) finds them...

...and offers to lead them to Hot Rod and Kup after gaining their trust (by shooting Grimlock in the nose)

Meanwhile, Unicron tells Galvatron where to find Ultra Magnus (since he obviously can’t do it on his own). You know, if Unicron knows where to find the Matrix, why doesn’t he just destroy it himself?

Meanwhile, on the planet of Junk, Ultra Magnus and company are repairing the shuttle (with Wreck-Gar and his people, the Junkions, looking on from a distance) when Gavlatron arrives and attacks!

Eventually, Ultra Magnus is cornered and attempts to unleash the power of the Matrix on the Decepticons, but nothing happens. And so...

Galvatron takes the Matrix from the corpse of Ultra Magnus and returns to Unicron.

Back at the planet of the Sharkticons (for lack of a better name), it is now Kup and Hot Rod’s turn to be invited to dinner. The pair are dropped into the pool, but instead of waiting to be devoured, they go on the offensive. First they drive out of the pool, they continually crash into them, keeping them off-balance.

However, eventually the numbers game stacks the odds in the Sharkticons’ favor until...

...the Dinobots arrive and start kicking Sharkticon ass (there’s something about a foursome of robotic dinosaurs that screams awesomeness!) The Sharkticons are cowed when faced with robots more ferocious than they are. The Sharkticons’ masters demand they execute the Dinobots. Grimlock demands the Sharkticons execute their masters. Guess who they listen to.

With court now in permanent recess, Wheelie tells the others of a way off-planet in exchange for passage.

Meanwhile, on the planet of Junk, the Autobots are mourning the loss of Ultra Magnus when...

...the Junkions attack to the music of the one artist anyone has ever heard of on this soundtrack...

(thanks to entertainmentaroundtheworld)

...Dare to be Stupid by “Weird Al” Yankovic. One has to wonder his such a prominent artist (he was still riding off the success of Eat It at this point) wound up on the soundtrack. Simple, it was produced by his record label.

Suddenly, Kup, Hor Rod, Wheelie, and the Dinobots arrive in the ship they commandeered. Hot Rod tries the diplomatic approach, and befriends Wreck-Gar. For whatever reason, a dance party breaks out.

Wreck-Gar then offers to join the Autobots and helps reassemble Ultra Magnus (where were these guys when Optimus fell?) before setting course for Cybertron...using pieces of their own planet (which transform into a ship, naturally!)

Back at Unicron, Galvatron is threatening his master with the Matrix, but once again it refuses to open. At that point, Unicron reveals there’s more to him than meets the eye (say, that would be a great catchphrase!) and transforms into a planet-sized robot...

...that announces he will destroy Cybertron for Galvatron’s insolence! The Decepticons fight back, including Galvatron. Unicron is annoyed, so picks up Galvatron and swallows him whole.

That’s when the Autobots show up. Unicron attacks the Junkeons, but little damage is sustained (hard to trash something made of trash, I guess...) The Autobots’ ship doesn’t fare as well, crashing into Unicron’s eye (at least they breached his outer defenses...) Unfortunately, Unicron’s innards aren’t exactly defenseless...

Hot Rod is separated from the others and falls deep within Unicron, where he sees...

...the Matrix. (and Galvatron) Unicron orders Galvatron to destroy Hot Rod, and Galvatron is forced to obey.

Outside, the Dinobots test their mettle against Unicron. Unfortunately, a full frontal assault doesn’t work very well and they are forced to fall back.

In another part of Unicron, Daniel gets separated from the Autobots and finds a smelting area where robots are being dropped into an acid furnace to be melted down for scrap and energon. He then sees...

...Spike and Bumblebee about to be dropped. Daniel uses his exosuit’s blasters to close the lid to the acid, saving his father, Bumblebee, Jazz, and Cliffjumper. (ensuring at least a few G1 toys stay in production)

Elsewhere, Hot Rod manages to get the drop on Galvatron, running him over. Unfortunately, his offensive is short-lived, and Galvatron is poised to destroy him.

However, Hot Rod reaches up to grab the Matrix, causing it to glow...

...and transform Hot Rod into the new Autobot leader, Rodimus Prime.

Rodimus makes short work of Galvatron, then opens the matrix, lighting their darkest hour and destroying Unicron and ushering in a new era of Transformers cartoons!

#transformers #rodimus prime #galvatron #grimlock #Fan Colored Glasses

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sunnymegatron · 5 years ago

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The Ethics of Interracial Porn with Chris Cock - Ep 120

On Episode 120 of American Sex Podcast, adult performer Chris Cock talks with us about race in porn--namely the ethics and relevance of the interracial porn genre. Learn what inequities unfold behind the scenes in the making of IR content: what types of scenes qualify as interracial and which surprisingly don’t, race-based pay differentials, unequal adult industry POC media coverage, and more. Chris created the hashtag #IRRELEVANCE to not only call attention to this issue but find solutions. One involves performers redefining the IR genre making interracial content as we know it now irrelevant. Chris also gives advice for newcomers in the industry and important tips for new performers of color.

Submit your BDSM & sex advice questions by email to [email protected]

To support American Sex podcast, please visit patreon.com/americansex (plus you’ll get all episodes early, secret episodes, bonus stories from guests, on-air shout-outs, stuff in the mail & more!)

Get friendly with us on Twitter at @AmericanSexPod or visit sunnymegatron.com or americansexpodcast.com

Join our mailing list by visiting http://sunnymegatron.com/newsletter

Sunny & Ken, xo!

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Episode 120 Links

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Instagram http://instagram.com/chriscock_ & http://instagram.com/CoopersNCuties

Coopers And Cuties Youtube Channel

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdSwq4TUZl80RQouRUEGhwA

Marica Hase Official Channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCQSzY8YvL-OAWx-S9hqxt6g

A Class Divided: About Jane Elliot’s brown-eyed/blue-eyed experiment https://www.pbs.org/video/frontline-class-divided/

Petition to have domestic violence Laws updated in memory of Dr. Amie Harwick http://justice4amie.com

The Life and Death of Dr. Amie Harwick CBS News https://www.cbsnews.com/video/the-life-and-death-of-amie-harwick/?fbclid=IwAR2-oGIcjnjdJLlXpqI2RCTjlmyysCCe7rCJDvElg5y9hMCF5Ll9AGWE_Xo

American Sex Podcast subreddit: https://www.reddit.com/r/americansexpodcast

Wednesday night free American Sex podcast live stream, 2/26 8pm PST Dealing with Erectile Dysfunction http://bit.ly/sunnygetvokl

Episode 120 Sponsor, Affiliate & Giveaway Info

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15% off your order at Lovehoney when you use this link http://bit.ly/lovehoney15 (This link can be a little wonky and does not keep tracking cookies. If the discount does not show up in your cart (or disappears after you shop around on the site), access the site with that link again. Your items will still be in your cart & the discount will appear)

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