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#especially when the adults weren't there!
whumpster-fire · 2 days
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Yet another reason T. T. Sutherland is a coward and a fool for going "Peril has never been touched in battle before, the dragonflame cactus was her first time experiencing real pain" and I refuse to accept it as canon:
Cooler Headcanon: the reason Peril immediately had the idea of burning the venom out of Clay's wound when he got bitten by the Dragonbite Viper was because she's had to do that to herself after getting puncture wounds from sandwings that injected venom past the superheated layer of skin. It didn't do as much damage to her as it did to Clay because Peril's pretty much completely fireproof even under the skin, so the scars are pretty small and not that noticeable, but she does have a few.
The couple times she de-venomed herself during a battle were pretty much the most metal thing ever to happen in Scarlet's arena. A dragon getting an apparently mortal wound, jamming her claws right into the open wound, writhing on the sand in apparent death throes, and then after like a minute getting back up with "smoke" rising from her eyes and nose as well as the bloody, sizzling puncture, and proceeding to limp across the arena and utterly destroy her terrified opponent.
The dragons she was fighting didn't try to finish her off because they'd already severely burned their tail barbs and probably talons and wings doing it and weren't going to risk getting hurt even worse by a dying dragon. Then of course when their one hope of killing her turned out not to work they kind of lost the will to live.
This contributed significantly to Peril's reputation as an invincible monster, but on the other hand seeing the queen's champion curled in a fetal position, screaming, sobbing and obviously trying not to pass out, made some of the spectators present for those fights somewhat remember that this was a 2-3 year old dragonet being thrown in the arena with full grown adult enemy soldiers, which was pretty messed up even if the small child kept winning. These feelings of sympathy were often diminished a bit by what Peril did to her opponents afterward, but Queen Scarlet was still not pleased, and after it happened two or three times she got a supply of the antidote cactus for "if a guard accidentally gets gotten by a sandwing prisoner" purposes.
Ruby absolutely never saw this because she made a point of watching fights in the arena as little as possible, especially Peril's for obvious reasons.
On the other hand I just thought of the perfect explanation for why Carnelian was like "I wonder if she remembers me?" when Peril showed up at JMA instead of freaking out like most of the dragons there. At some point, early in her career as a child soldier before she ended up in Ruby's unit, she was working in the palace and got voluntold to help out during an incident when Peril got stabbed in the shoulder or something where she couldn't reach with her claws so somebody had to very carefully burn the venom out with a red hot nail and a pair of tongs. Carnelian's actual job was probably something like holding a bucket of water and pouring it on the spear haft a third dragon was holding Peril's wing closed with, but she met Peril in a vulnerable state when she wasn't trying to perform for the crowd, and also saw her trying really hard to avoid accidentally injuring anyone, which led to her being one of a small number of skywings who are capable of being normal about Peril.
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arte072 · 7 months
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"Sansa bullied Arya? Oh so you think she's worse than Tywin Lannister, Gregor Clegane and Ramsay Bolton??" is such a hyperbolic, insincere and ultimately non-existent argument. Literally name one person who says this shit with any sort of sincerity, if at all lol
This is up there with "Talking about Arya's importance to the North means you think Jeyne Poole's life doesn't matter!!!" in terms of disningenous talking points.
It's only ever used to shut down any attempts at considering Arya's feelings and well-being when discussing the girls' relationship.
and no offense, but why are 🫵 YOU🫵 equating the acknowledgement of a fictional child's flaws with calling her a war criminal? why are you treating it like that?? 👀👀👀
I mean, this fandom regularly says Arya lacks morality for surviving war zones with violence. They consider her a walking tragedy whose story is about losing her humanity and becoming the ultimate killing machine. Everyday Dany gets called a N@zi Barbie for not abolishing slavery perfectly. But Sansa gets clocked as a mean girl bully in the first book and y'all fall apart at the seams at that?? C'mon now
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lungfuls · 2 months
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Interesting that the # of licensed drivers in the US is decreasing
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shions-chin-scar · 11 months
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i want a full essay on haruta, you seem like a knowing person
*cracks knuckles* My time has come.
So, Haruta. Whether you love 'im, hate 'im, love to hate 'im, he's a character that few people in the fandom feel indifferent about. But I believe that he's also slightly deeper than the giggling sword-wielding maniac he seems to be at first glance.
Also there will be MANGA SPOILERS so don't click if you're anime-only
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First, let's take a look at his name.
Shigemo is written with 重 (“shige” = heavy, important) and 面 (“mo” = mask), and together those two characters can literally be read as "multi-faced". This is already a hint to his personality: Haruta is someone who acts childish and humorous, but is actually cruel and cold-hearted.
Haruta is written with 春 (“haru” = spring) and 太 (“ta” = thick/big, a common male suffix). Spring is the symbol of new life, of a fresh start. It could be a possible hint to him recently becoming a curse user, or maybe a reference to his power.
Next, his perceptive and cunning nature.
Because yes, Haruta is actually pretty damn smart and tactical despite acting like a goofball most of the time. People are way too quick to write him off as a weakling and make fun of both him and Nobara for her defeat at his hands. Here are a few examples:
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^Recognizing Nobara and accurately gauging her growth despite not fighting her during their previous (and only) encounter
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^Understanding what the injured Megumi was doing and not letting his own guard down
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^Realizing what Megumi was about to do (unfortunately too late)
He's also surprisingly self-aware about his own limitations despite his arrogance regarding his own abilities. When Gojo broke the barrier around the school, what did Haruta do? Immediately dip. When Nanami backhanded him across the whole store, what did Haruta do? Realize he was way outmatched and try to run. He's different from the likes of Juzo (hang rack guy) or Jougo, who overestimate what they can do and underestimate their opponents. Haruta knows he's not hot stuff, and as he says it himself, he's best at picking on the weak.
And let's not forget what a tactical fighter he is.
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^Sending his sword after Nitta, fooling Nobara and allowing him to both keep track of her position and take her down
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^Targets his opponent's weak spots to take them down
That was actually one of my few pet peeves with the anime: it felt like they made him less tactical. They removed Nobara's line about him aiming for specific points, as well as him injuring her leg, and it made his question about the sword hitting her head seem genuine rather than sarcastic.
His potential past.
This is where I'll be entering headcanon territory, but canon backs me up quite a bit on certain elements of it.
Haruta mentions that he doesn’t even know what exactly his own cursed technique does or how it works. Therefore, the likelihood of him coming from a family of sorcerers or having received a formal jujutsu education are more or less void. Had he inherited a technique like Nobara or Megumi, or gotten schooling, he would probably know more about it.
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There is a running theme among curse users (whose past we know) of being rejected, sometimes even persecuted by society for their ability to see the supernatural:
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Therefore, it’s not too far-fetched to assume that Haruta likely went through something similar himself. It would explain a few things about him.
Haruta's psychological issues.
I'm going to say it straight off the bat: I won't diagnose him with anything. I'm not a psychologist, though I did study psych in college. All I'm going to do is list a few of the obvious issues he has and their potential causes. JJK is a series of grey and gray, not black and white. No one is pure good and pure evil in it (except arguably some of the Curses because, well... they're Curses), and everyone has their own unique circumstances that led to them being the way they are.
That being said, one thing that immediately jumped out to me about Haruta is his barely hidden low self-esteem and insecurities. He's actually quite self-deprecating. If he just did it around other people I'd be inclined to believe that it's part of his "uwu i'm baby" front, but he also does it when he's alone.
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It's worth noting that he also seems to specialize in sneak attacks from behind - fitting for a self-admitted bully who prefers to prey on the weak.
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Yet at the same time, he's pretty full of himself and seems to have a certain paradoxical sense of superiority.
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That's why I half-jokingly said in the tags of a previous posts that he has an inferiority-superiority complex. I think Haruta knows that he's not strong, but that his technique is absolutely broken even if he himself isn't particularly skilled (though he seems to have gained some confidence between the school invasion and the Shibuya incident - that's part of why I think he's a fairly recent curse user).
It's worth noting that the jujutsu world is much more dangerous than the regular one and death roams around every corner, doubly so for curse users who have a Kill On Sight order on their heads, and triply so when one’s cursed technique isn’t suited for fighting. It must be easy to feel weak and helpless under those circumstances.
Now let's get to the obvious, which are also Haruta's biggest flaws: his sadism and impulsivity.
Haruta obviously takes a lot of pleasure in hurting others, but what's especially concerning is he seems unable to hold himself back when he sees an opportunity for it, or think of long-term consequences. He tried to kill an injured Hanami just because he could, without realizing that doing so would anger the other Curses, and he went after Megumi despite barely escaping his encounter with Nanami an hour or so prior, which led to his death. He actually reminds me a bit of Himiko Toga from My Hero Academia, in that both of them just want to have fun in this world. What Toga really wants deep down is love and acceptance though - unfortunately Haruta never got the character development that she did.
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He also clearly lacks empathy, which in itself isn't necessarily a bad thing, but combined with a personality that enjoys tormenting other people and has poor planning skills, it makes for a devastating combo.
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^A perfectly healthy reaction to seeing an injured ally
It's worth noting that sadism and aggressive behaviors are believed to stem from both genetic and environmental (e.g., childhood trauma) factors. It can for example be a way for the person to turn the tables on the world and vent out their past hurts and anger, by making other people suffer like they suffered. Or a way to feel powerful - again, Haruta is someone with low self-esteem who preys exclusively on the weak.
TL;DR
Haruta Shigemo is actually pretty damn cool and smart and not just some one-dimensional grunt and he deserved better.
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^Me @ Gege
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to-the-batcomputer · 2 months
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how i feel about shipping brudick is always switching from one extreme to the other. like one moment i'm thinking about it and i'm like Yes this makes sense this is beautiful and true. the next i'm like oh god i am going to hell for even considering this
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feralnumberfive · 2 years
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I only learned about the BTR "Sarah incident" last night but it's even funnier that the person titled the YouTube video "Big Time Swearing" 😭
youtube
The full video is on this blog
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deservedgrace · 1 year
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Negative///
You ever just cry because it was clearly your own fault for getting indoctrinated because if you were just smarter you wouldn't have fallen for it
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wonder-worker · 6 months
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It is difficult to argue that [Edward IV] was wrong in what he did. His advancement of [Richard of Gloucester] can be criticized only by those who believe that the only good nobleman is an impotent nobleman. Medieval kings did not think in these terms. Gloucester’s power was valuable because it ensured royal control of a significant and troublesome part of the country. Nor can Edward be blamed for not foreseeing the ends to which Gloucester might put his power. The duke had been a loyal upholder of the house of York, a central figure in Edward’s polity*; there was no obvious reason why he should not occupy the same role under Edward V. In this respect, precedent was on Edward’s side. Previous minorities had seen squabbles over the distribution of power, but no young king had ever been deposed. Even royal uncles traditionally drew a line at that, something which explains why Gloucester’s actions seemed so shocking to contemporaries and, perhaps, the reason why he got away with it so easily in the short term.
In the immediate sense, Gloucester must take final responsibility for what happened in 1483. However one explains the motives behind his actions, things happened because he chose that they should: there is nothing in the previous reign which compelled him to act as he did.
-Rosemary Horrox, "Richard III: A Study of Service"
*Richard was also, yk, Edward's own brother who had been entirely loyal to him during his life. The problem wasn’t that Edward trusted Richard (why wouldn't he?), the problem is that Richard broke that trust in a horrible and unprecedented way to usurp a 12-year-old. Please understand the difference.
#wars of the roses#edward iv#richard iii#edward v#my post#The arguments of Ross and Pollard (et al) are so profoundly unserious and ahistorical#casting an unforeseeable turn of events as a predictable ('structural') one as David Horspool rightly puts it#Ross specifically is entirely dependent on his own horrible view of Elizabeth Woodville and her family as the basis of his analysis#but anyway. as Horrox points out later in the book:#''although earlier events [during Edward's reign] cannot be said to have caused the crisis they did have some bearing in how it developed'#namely Edward's legacy of forfeitures in the 1460s; manipulation of property descents; and fluctuating royal favour.#the most prominent and politically important of all of these were the manipulation of the Mowbray and Howard family fortunes#This is often used to enhance the unserious and ahistorical arguments of historians like Ross and Pollard that Edward doomed his son#But as Horrox points out: Edward's reign did not exist in a vacuum and needs to be analyzed by actual historical context.#from a broader perspective his actions were not especially transgressive as far as English kings were concerned#NO MONARCH (Edward III; Henry VII; etc) died with every single one of their nobles 100% content and supportive#they weren't living in Disney movies and there's no point holding Edward IV to fairytale standards that did not exist.#More importantly Horrox points out that Edward's actions (eg: the Mowbray and Howard cases) need to be put into actual perspective#They were not perceived as problems and did not cause problems during his own reign.#They did not cause problems after he died before Edward V arrived in London.#They only became problems after Richard decided to seize power and deliberately exploited them as bribes for political support#Had Richard decided to support his nephew or work with the Woodvilles - Edward's actions (@ the Mowbrays and Howards) would be irrelevant#(It's also worth pointing out that we don't know WHEN Richard decided to usurp. It if it was a more gradual desire then his depowering#of the Woodvilles by exploiting Mowbray & Howard discontent would not have not affected *Edward V's* ascension or prospects)#ie: the problem isn't that discontent existed with a few specific nobles (that was normal) the problem was how Richard took advantage of it#In theory this sort of thing would have been a potential threat for ANY heir to the throne whether they were a minor or an adult#In itself it's not really unique to Edward and it's silly when historians criticize him and him alone for it. It was more or less standard.#(if anything the fact that he was able to do them so successfully is an indication of his authority)#We come back to Horspool's point: 'Without one overriding factor' - Richard's initiative and actions - 'none of this could have happened.'#which is where this analysis of Horrox's comes in :)
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causalitylinked · 1 year
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AKIRA’S BENTO.
The only people who are allowed to have any is either Seiji, @more-than-a-princess’s Sonia, or someone he at least considers a friend, because I personally headcanon Akira is very territorial over his food, especially since he was someone who grew up being so poor, he would occasionally skip meals, to the point where he would go to bed, hungry. Due to this being the case, you do not want to steal his lunch without asking, because he will punch you. Of course, it’s a different matter entirely if he cooks for you, for he made the food especially for you, but when it comes to his own, he’s quick to fly into an autistic rage, should you eat it.
But yeah, as someone who lives by himself, Akira would canonically cook his own meals. Because he really likes meat, though, one tends to notice that his bentos tends to be very... protein heavy. Seriously, someone else besides Seiji needs to get on his case about eating more veggies every now and then.
TAGGED BY: @brawlqueen ( thank you, lily! this was very fun to do. )
TAGGING: @devildukem / @paenseo / @xamassed ( himari ) / @eliteimperialism and anyone else who might have a Japanese muse!
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longagoitwastuesday · 23 days
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Miwa is such a dear, and her writing makes very understandable that she likes Gojo, beyond the fact that he is the Takada of Jujutsu society. A nice detail
#And then at the very end Gojo refers to her as 'the one that seens to be a kind person' or something along those lines#and it drives the point home even more#Gojo and Utahime weren't talking about the same thing though right? Like‚ they weren't talking about which type of person they liked#I can't imagine Utahime asking that especially not to Gojo#And I can't imagine her listening to his answer and not getting mad#It gave me more a different sort of conversation air? Like that other conversation in which Gojo also mention Miwa not by name#after his reunion with the old man#Or does Utahime go asking for this stuff as well? It doesn't seem to suit her but what do I know#Todo is her student after all haha#Todo is such a dear too in a weird way#I like how opposed to the killing Itadori stuff Miwa and him are#I loved when Todo defended Itadori and Miwa was relieved because she didn't have to do it anymore#I also really love Nobara. I loved her here being appalled by the fact would just kill Itadori because they were told to do so#And yeah Panda is right. For them he is Sukuna's vessel and like a curse to be exorcised. This is how Megumi saw him for two minutes as wel#But the Tokyo students reconsider these ideas with a lot more ease than the Kyoto ones#Gojo is actually a good teacher. In some sense at least. I like this bit of writing a lot#The Kyoto school needs some other trustworthy adult. Those kids have potential they just have that terrible old man with them#Anyway kinda funny that Panda is the clever one. He sent everyone to help Yuuji expect for Tunna man#because they need to end the competition to finish the assassination attempts for good#Anyway... Let's go on#I talk too much#I should probably delete this later#Tunna man is Toge Inumaki. I keep forgetting
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dredshirtroberts · 8 months
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it's happened multiple times over the past [mumbles an amount of time that might be a week might not be who knows] and because of the circumstances of today i have a feeling it'll happen again(might not though, cause i'm already talking about it) but
every so often i remember i'm allowed to take medicine to make my body feel less pain all over, and so i do, and i get discouraged that it doesn't work instantly. And then 3-4 hours later i'm up and moving around with the sprightliness of something sprightly and going "Wow, I dn't feel any different from earlier, what is this big change?! Maybe I am not disabled afterall and was faking it" and then i gotta stop myself and go
"Hey. Dumbass. You think it might be the naproxen we took a few hours ago that's just kicking in because you finally ate something and have given it time to work? you think that might be it, bud?"
Anyway there was a tangent about being sprightly like the oldest lady at your church who doesn't look like she should be able to move that quickly, but she does everything and then i realized that maybe comparing my body on a good day to an elderly lady might not be the sign of sprightliness that other folks read and i ran out of sprightly things to describe because i was so caught up in my little old lady experience.
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The world is so hostile to tweens.....
Like we joke about how our schools growing up would ban the latest toy trends, but that reality genuinely horrific when you think about it. Like maybe 1% of the bans were based on safety, but the rest cited reasoning like
-"kids were bartering for collectibles" (kids learning about economics and product value)
-"kids were wearing them and the colors were too flashy" (kids experimenting with self expression and fashion)
-"kids were playing with them during lunch and recess instead of using our rusted safety hazard playground" (kids utilizing their free time to do what helps *them* unwind).
Play areas specifically geared towards children and especially towards teens are constantly being shut down. "Oh kids today are always on their phones!" Maybe because
-there are barely any arcades left and even less arcades that aren't adult-oriented,
-public pools and gyms are underfunded and shut down,
-"no loitering" laws prevent kids and teens from just hanging out,
-movie theatres only play the latest films and ticket prices are only rising,
-parks and playgrounds are either neglected or replaced with gear only directed at toddlers and unsuitable for anyone older
-genuine children's and young teen media is being phased out in favour of media directed only at very small children or older teens and adults.
-suburbs and even cities are becoming more and more hostile to pedestrians, it's just not safe for kids to walk to or ride their bikes to their friends' houses or other play destinations
Children's agency is hardly ever respected. Kids between the ages of 9-13 are either treated as babies or as full-grown adults, with no in-between. When they ask to be given more independence, they are either scoffed at or given more responsibilities than are reasonable for a child their age.
This is even evident in the fashion scene.
Clothing stores and brands like Justice and Gap are either closing or rebranding to either exclusively adult clothing or young children's clothes, with no middle ground for tweens. Tweens have to choose between clothes designed for adults that are too large and/or too mature for their age and bodies, or more clothes they feel are far too childish. For tween girls especially it's either a frilly pinafore dress with pigtails or a woman's size dress with cleavage. No wonder tween girls these days dress like they're older, it's because their other option is little girl clothes and they don't want to feel childish.
And then when tweens go to school, the books they want to read aren't available because they cover "mature" topics (read: oh no two people kissed and they weren't straight or oh no menstruation was mentioned or oh no a religion other than Christianity is depicted), so kids are left with books for way below their reading level. No wonder kids today are struggling with literacy, it's because they can't exercise and expand their reading skills with age-appropriate books. Readers need to be challenged with new words and concepts in order to grow in their skills, only letting tween read Dr. Seuss and nursery rhymes doesn't let them learn.
Discussions about substance use, reproduction, and sexuality aren't taught at an age-appropriate level in school or even by children's parents, so they either grow up ignorant and more vulnerable to abuse, or they seek out information elsewhere that is delivered in a less-than-age-appropriate manner. It shouldn't be a coin-toss between "I didn't know what sex was until I was 18 and in college" or "my first exposure to sex as a tween was through porn" or "I didn't know what sex was so I didn't know I was being sexually abused as a kid."
Tweenhood is already such a volatile and confusing time for kids, their bodies are changing and they're transitioning from elementary to middle to high school. It's hard enough for them in this stage, but it's made worse by how society devalues and fails them.
We talk about the disappearance of teenagehood, and maybe that's gonna happen in the future, but the erasure of tweenhood is happing in real time, and it's having and going to have major consequences for next generation's adults.
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gremlingottoosilly · 4 months
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I just need willing sexworker reader with Mafia Konig.
He is fighting against the urge to have his lil wifey near bc he knows he will fuck 24/7 and also she would be his weakness. But how can he say no when she begs him so sweetly with his cock inside, when she says a mere thing about how they would be a cute family.
My breeding kink is showing, forgive my manners.
Oh, he can't resist your begging. This man is weak - for you especially, with his mind working overtime just to compensate for all the things he is throwing away to be able to spend a few more hours buried deep in your pussy. You look so fucking precious under him, your body mangled to fit him perfectly - he needs you, wants you, sometimes thinks you're literally just a plant from a rival gang to make him stop working and just fuck you all the time. If you sleep together and you ask him to stay with you during the morning, with that adorable groggy voice of yours, he won't ever be able to resist - and if you want for him to breed your pussy until you're so filled up you can't walk, he will gladly stop whatever he was doing. It started so simple. Konig was your client, paid a bit too much, and always took care of you afterward - if not personally, then by hotel staff and paid nights at the luxurious resorts. You couldn't help but fall for him, even if only for a little bit at the start. You adored his gifts, his compliments, even his obsession and his work - he protected you, started booking all of your sessions to drive clients away, even managed to get you an apartment without any strings attached. Well, without any strings that weren't attached to him, that is. Konig sees you as his reprieve, his little saving grace. He indulges in your body and makes sure you know just how much he adores having you by his side. You're his weakness, and he tells you that it's going to get him killed one day, but if that means keeping you on his lap while dealing with gun deals and the drug trade, he is willing to risk everything. He needs you by his side - if not as a helper, then as stress relief. Konig never cared too much about what was going to happen with his mafia empire after he died, but now he started to think about heirs, legacy, making you pregnant, and then spawning a little army of his kids, ready to take over neighboring countries. You beg him to fuck you so sweetly, he just can't resist. Even if his age means he can't quite go on multiple rounds like he used to at his horny young adult times, he is still going to keep his favourite lady satisfied. And fucked so much, she wouldn't be able to crawl out of the bed next morning, letting him tend to his criminal business.
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Yandere bruce wayne with neglected!daughter reader
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Seen a bunch of neglected reader fics recently but I haven't seen one of a Reader who slowly starts to take advantage of the situation and uses batfam for their money and connections so here's this! This only focuses on Bruce for now but if anyone is interested I'd be willing to do some for the other batfam members + hcs for when/if they snap and kidnap the reader. 
Was suppoused to headcanons but ended up more as long rambles than anything lol mainly set up for later posts detailing the situation
Pt1 it got too long, word count ; 2461
Unedited
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Bruce is absolutely the most susceptible to this behavior, he feels the most guilt about the situation (as he should for being a neglectful father) and he is not going to lie to himself to try and save face and make himself feel better and if he does it's only for a short while before reality slaps him in the face and he has to see the truth. The truth is that there is no one to blame but himself.
When he first noticed your disappearance it had happened slowly… entirely too slow when he really took the time to think about it. You had been gone for a full year and he hadn't even noticed? Were you even old enough to be on your own like that? Something he felt ashamed that he even had to ask. When Alfred informs him that you're nineteen just this month he's shocked not only that you're an adult and that he didn't even realize your birthday had passed but that he couldn't even remember your face. He searches his memories for your Visage but all that he can recall is murky; he can't even remember the correct shade of your eyes or your hair and it startles him how long has it been since he took the time to properly look at you? 
It takes some time but eventually he remembers your face with sudden clarity, he hadn't seen it in a while and the only image he could conjure up was when he first saw you, a small helpless looking child left on his doorstep by commissioner Gordon.  your eyes held the same dull glassy look that his did the night his parents died, you had lost your mom in a similar vein he felt he could relate to at the time. he remembered seeing you and feeling sad for you but not in the way a father does for his child the way he felt was the same way he felt as Batman seeing victims in Gotham streets you didn't deserve this life but you weren't anyone close to him. 
His chest aches and he remembers the way you'd clung to him your first week in the manor and then the way you wilted when he shut that down, it wasn't like he was trying to hurt you but he couldn't have you following him around everywhere especially not when gothams crime was getting out of hand even with the other members picking up his slack. So he reprimanded you, way too harshly now that he looks back on it he knows he only meant to keep you from discovering his secret but he could have worded it better instead he made it sound like you were a burden. Maybe you were to him at the time he thinks and is disgusted with himself for even letting the thought cross his head. 
He reads your diary page after page until he reads through the whole thing. The first few pages are hopeful but solemn detailing how much you missed your mother but you're glad that you have a whole new family and you hope that they will like you, it's heartbreaking to read that kind of childish hope turn into sadness and then hate. You detailed how no one would make time for you that you'd tried everything to get their attention but you'd get blown off by each one it turns into rants about you asking what was wrong with you and why no one ever spent any time with you the writing was scribbled on so he knows you did it in a hurry just to vent out your frustration. The part that hurt most were the pages about him, you had nothing good to say about him in fact in one of the pages you had written that you didn't have much to say about him at all that you hardly knew him and barely saw him once a month and couldn't even call him your father. 
Surely that couldn't be true right? He's not the best father figure by far but he always tried to make time for dick, Tim, Jason, Steph, Damian and Cass ... .surely he did for you. 
He tries to find memories of him being a good father or at least trying to be any kind of father figure to you at all but he can't he can only see the times he rejected your pleas to spend time with you for things he deemed more important than you he sees it clearly each time he rejected you how you got sadder and sadder how you seemed to wilt at each and every rejection until you stopped asking. 
he tries to tell himself that he did it for your protection that he just didn't want to get you involved in the crime fighting scene and since gothams streets were never without crime he spent an exorbitant amount of his time as Batman down in the batcave or out fighting crime with his other children and that's why he couldn't spend time with you. And that's why he seemingly had so many memories with them in the recent years; hell even in the recent weeks he has more memories with dick and the others than he ever had made with you. he tries to use it as an excuse to mask the truth; that you didn't matter in the grand scheme of his life, at least not then but he's going to do everything to make this right.
You'll be surprised to suddenly get a ton of texts from an unknown number even more so when you find out it's from bruce. Suddenly he's asking you how you've been, how was the move, are you in college right now, what major did you take? Obviously you're taken aback when the man who acted like you didn't exist suddenly wants to know everything about you. You would think he'd needed something but you know better than that what could he possibly need with you now? You don't have any money and he wouldn't need that anyways. Maybe he's dying and needs a kidney or something…whatever you don't care that man can rot. 
You leave his messages on read of course, because you don't owe him a response and well maybe to be a bit petty and give him a taste of his own medicine. You don't know how bitter the taste is in Bruce's mouth, he knows you've seen them so why won't you respond? Bruce usually isn't a multi texter but he'll send more and more trying to get any kind of response out of you, he's constantly checking his phone hoping to see three little dots appear and he's noticeably slightly more angsty when out patrolling with the others. 
The texts were annoying but you could mute his notifications and after the first few weeks you basically forgot about the texts going about your normal life until he started calling. It seemed like he was always calling Day in day out, you blocked his number because of how annoying it was but he always just gets a new one leaving the same text “ hey your name its dad” and then the calling would resume. 
One day you pick up and Bruce sounds so relieved when he says your name into the receiver you figure he might really need that kidney if he sounds this excited to see you.
When you answer back he knows you aren't excited in fact you sound completely disinterested in him which takes him by surprise, isn't this what you wanted? What you cried for in your diary begging God that your father would notice you. You're older now so maybe you just aren't looking for that kind of attention anymore, the thought haunts him the idea that he could never truly make it up to you still he pushes through his voice sounding nervous as he starts to tentatively ask about your day. You cut him off with a scoff after some terse conversation telling him to just get to the point already and stop wasting your time. 
The silence is deafening and you almost hang up before he croaks out a response “sorry name, I just wanted to know what you were up to I know we uh.. haven't talked in awhile I just wanted to hear from you and know that everything was alright”  could this really be your father? He sounds so pathetic to you at that very moment, nothing like the confident man you saw on television often nor the man you saw taking care of everyone but you. 
And no nothing was alright you were working a job you hated in some shitty little apartment in Gotham that you had to fear if it would get broken into or not because the damn landlord wouldn't change the faulty locks a rage takes you and you just let it all fall out cursing him for your shitty life and the shitty apartment and for being a shitty father letting all that rage out until you're left heaving.  its silent after your outburst you think he might have hung up but after a moment he offers to pay for a new place and offers to pay your current rent until you can break the lease and that he will take care of you and not to worry about anything financial telling you to quit your job and to send him your bank so he can get things sorted out.  
At first you wanted to vehemently deny this, wanting to prove to yourself that you didn't need him or his help but something In the back of your head tells you to accept it, that if he expects anything back for it then that's his fault for assuming. So you tell him and soon there's a large sum of money in your account more than you have ever had in there. For once you can actually afford to treat yourself instead of eating shitty microwaved ramen, and so you dine out in a nice reasonably expensive restaurant with your friends and you enjoy yourself. 
A week passes in silence and then he's sending you pictures of luxury apartments telling you to pick out any one you want and that he'll get everything settled and you almost can't believe this. Would he actually pay for something so outrageously expensive? You almost doubt it but once your lease is up Bruce is at your door helping you move out any furniture you wanted to keep which was almost nothing seeing as everything was already worn out anyways. 
You didn't say much to him and he seemed to realize you were in no talking mood so he allowed you to be quiet and told you about himself instead talking about the boys and what he'd been working on recently, it feels like what he should've been for you years ago an interaction you'd have killed for when you were fourteen and it just pisses you off so you turn on the radio instead to drown out his words. You don't care how he's doing, you don't want to hear about dick or damian, you're only accepting his help because you're tired of living in that shitty apartment. The ride is otherwise silent except for the annoyingly upbeat pop music which would probably make Damian or Jason have an aneurysm if they had to listen to it. 
The goodbye is  awkward. You can tell Bruce wants to come inside and talk more but you thank him for helping you move in the furniture and shut the door. 
He buys you new furniture without you asking and sends it in by the second week you're in the apartment. You don't realize that he stalks your posts and that he saw one of you complaining about the lack of good furniture.
Life has never been better for you, you live in luxury and can go on shopping sprees literally whenever you want and Bruce sends you a random stream of cash whenever you start to get low and you're definitely not going to look a gift horse in the mouth not when you enjoy every luxury you are afforded. 
Life is good until a certain black haired prick starts inserting himself into your life and this time it isn't bruce, nope it just had to be your annoyingly bubbly, touchy, and all too friendly ‘stepbrother’ dick grayson.
___
So yeah all in all Bruce has the capability to recognize your strained relationship is all his fault and that he never should have ignored you and how selfish he was to put his duties as Batman above his duties as a father to you. He realized he didn't even try to balance the two. 
And Despite himself he ended up hurting you and neglecting you so he feels he owes it to you to make things right even if 'making things right' entails him buying you a luxury apartment or purchasing the latest phone or new car. The best part is that Bruce will not demand time from you (yet) because of his guilt.  He simply suggests that maybe you should come out with him saying that he planned a whole day for the two of you but the ball is in your court since whether or not you ever accept his invites he will continue to be your cash cow to absolve himself of his guilt. 
It's fun because now you get to watch him wilt everytime you reject his attempts at reconnecting, you get to have your petty revenge watching as a part of him dies inside each and every time you ignore the conversations he tries to start when pulling money out of the bank,  you get to watch how he seems to lose all of his luster when you leave once the cash is in your hands without so much as a thanks. Bruce isn't stupid he knows this dynamic is unhealthy and recognizes it for what it is but this is the only way he can get you to talk to him or to even look in his direction. He has his limits though eventually you will talk to him whether you want to or not 
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slvttyplum · 3 months
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there it was: the infamous elevator that you and satoru were in multiple times, finally getting fixed. normal functioning adults with half a brain would be happy that the elevator leading to their penthouse was getting fixed, but you and satoru were practically shedding tears watching the two handymen working on it.  the banging is giving you a headache, but tears also threaten to fall out of your eyes.
now, obviously, both of you weren't idiots. obviously, there was a reason the two of you were saddened by the sudden fix.
three months ago is what started it all. the elevator that went from the lobby straight to satoru's penthouse broke; it sat in an empty hallway, not being used by anyone, and satoru couldn't have that, so he did what any horn ball with a sexy partner would do: put it to use.
yall would have sex in it, yall fucked in it so much that you were certain it was going to break again even if it wasn't in use at the moment. the adrenaline of fucking with the chances of getting caught made everything ten times sexier; it was fun; there's not much you could say about it other than that.
you were supposed to be the one to tell satoru that it was a horrible and irresponsible thing to do, especially since people walked by the elevator at all times of the day, but you loved the thrill, and the fact that you had to be quiet when satoru was digging his nails into your hips while he slammed into you, the tip of his dick pushing firmly on your sweet spot.
"shhh, baby, you don't want to get caught, do you?" a smirk on his face as he whispered into your ears. you were so easy to please; that's why this was so fun. he knew you couldn't keep down your moans forever, and that's when the possibility of getting caught came into play, because, in satoru's words…
"a slut that can't help but express how they feel."
sliding his fingers in your mouth to keep you from moaning but pushing them so far back into your mouth that you start to gag on them, watery eyes and a wet pussy as he slammed into you back to back.
fucking you deep like you were at home, but you weren't, causing limp legs and an aching core, but you were always going to do it again.
sneaking downstairs at two a.m. for some excitement as satoru pushes open the door as his hungry eyes trail over you, ready to eat everything but drink everything that came out of you. to be fair, the both of you shared some special moments in the elevator. the sex was amazing in it; it felt so different than in the bedroom or anywhere else, for that matter.
the way his hands rubbed over you and held you up felt so good; he made sure you were comfortable while still fucking you rough and deep, his lips kissing the back of your neck as his tongue slides over your skin, softly sucking on your sweet spot, and moans erupting from your mouth.
it wouldn't even be thirty minutes in, and the floors were slick with your fluids and his combining, along with his cum dripping out of you as he fucked it deep inside of you. the sound of his hips slapping against your ass, leaving you concerned but also aroused at the fact anyone can come in.
everything was perfect in that elevator, but satoru had something better.
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genderkoolaid · 5 months
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expand on ur "mental asylum Marxism shit" thing about children & grief?? from what you've said im pretty sure i will relate from my own experiences as a grieving child. also it sounds interesting!!
so i was thinking about how weird it is that, when a child has to deal with the death of a loved one, they say something like "no child should have to go through this! no child should have to even think about death!" which strikes me as weird because i was a child who dealt with the deaths of multiple close family members, very close together. the first was my great-grandmother, who i lived with and who was my best friend. death was never foreign to me (my mom has always been very death-positive on top of all that). grief was just part of my life like everything else was.
but i realized that its because people think childhood should not have any flaws. you should be 100% happy and fulfilled all the time. any time a child experiences anything painful, its bad. not "children should have access to love and support," but "children should not have basic life experiences because the idea of childhood being anything other than fluffy purity scares me."
because children in society are fundamentally not people. especially in a society structured around christian beliefs in natural law theory, that what is natural = what is good, healthy, and Divinely commanded. so on top of children being the property of adults, they are also forced to be the symbols of Nature. whatever is the most useful to whoever needs them. which means we built up this idea of children as tabula rasas, pureness incarnate. like a magic mirror where if we look into it, we'll be able to catch a glimpse of the true face of humanity. every single thing children do can be scrutinized for some grand truth about humans as a whole. and then, the ways children are treated also reflect how we think humanity should interact with its own nature.
example: the idea of humanity as inherently sinful and wicked, with that urge needing to be suppressed through state violence (hello hobbes) = the idea that children are annoying and shitty on purpose and need to be forced via punishment into being Good Citizens.
this is also why children cannot be trans, even though all trans people must prove that we were trans children. being queer must be unnatural; and even if not, its inherently sexual, and sexuality is dirty and bad. so children can't be trans, and they also can't read books on puberty until their parents decide when and what exactly they are allowed to learn. child victims of sexual assault only matter to the extent that they can be used as a symbol of a cultural threat; calling Jewish or trans people pedophiles means saying that they are foreigners attacking basic human nature, and indirectly, Divine command. if you aren't the right kind of victim, or when you inevitably reveal yourself to be A Person with complicated experiences and opinions, you are no longer of use to the agenda.
it sucks that bad things happen to anyone. aspects of youth can exacerbate the pain sometimes, but sometimes it does the reverse: I wish I could have spent more time with the family members I lost, but I know other people who are glad they loss family members young, because they weren't really hurt by it. I think the main thing is that, even sometimes when we talk about our past selves, we project this cultural idea of Child As Purity and ignore the actual person having the experience. when we "empathize" with children by projecting Purity onto them, we aren't actually connecting with them.
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