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popculty · 3 years

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52 Films by Women: 2020 Edition

Another annual challenge complete!

Last year, I focused on diversifying my list. This year I kept that intention but focused on watching more non-American films and films from the 20th century. Specifically, I sought out Agnès Varda’s entire filmography, after her death in 2019. (I was not disappointed - What a filmmaking legend we lost.)

I also kept a film log for the first time and have included some of my thoughts on several films from that log. I made a point of including reviews both positive and negative, because I think it’s important to acknowledge the variability and breadth of the canon, so as not to put every film directed by a woman on a pedestal. (Although movies directed by women must clear a much higher bar to be greenlit, meaning generally higher quality...But that’s an essay for another day :)

* = directed by a woman of color

bold = fave

1. The Rhythm Section (2020) dir. Reed Morano - Not as good as it could have been, given Morano’s proven skill behind the camera, but also not nearly as bad as the critics made it out to be. And unbelievably refreshing to see a female revenge story not driven by sexual assault or the loss of a husband/child.

2. Cléo de 5 à 7 (1962) dir. Agnès Varda - If you ever wanted to take a real-time tour of Paris circa 1960, this is the film for you.

3. Little Women (2019) dir. Greta Gerwig - Still my favorite Little Women adaptation. I will re-watch it every year and cry.

4. Varda by Agnès (2019) dir. Agnès Varda & Didier Rouget

5. Booksmart (2019) dir. Olivia Wilde - An instant classic high school comedy romp that subverts all the gross tropes of its 1980s predecessors.

6. Girls of the Sun (2018) dir. Eva Husson

7. Blue My Mind (2017) dir. Lisa Brühlmann

8. Portrait of a Lady On Fire (2019) dir. Céline Sciamma - Believe the hype. This film is a master thesis on the female gaze, and also just really effing gorgeous.

9. Belle Epine (2010) dir. Rebecca Zlotowski

10. Vamps (2012) dir. Amy Heckerling - With Krysten Ritter and Alicia Silverstone as modern-day vampires, I was so ready for this movie. But it feels like a bad stage play or a sit-com that’s missing a laugh-track. Bummer.

11. *Birds of Prey (2020) dir. Cathy Yan - Where has this movie been all our lives?? Skip the next onslaught of Snyder-verse grim-darkery and give me two more of these STAT!

12. She’s Missing (2019) dir. Alexandra McGuinness

13. The Mustang (2019) dir. Laure de Clermont-Tonnere - Trigger warning for the “protagonist” repeatedly punching a horse in the chest. I noped right out of there.

14. Monster (2003) dir. Patty Jenkins – I first watched this movie when I was probably too young and haven’t revisited it since. The rape scene traumatized me as a kid, but as an adult I appreciate how that trauma is not the center of the movie, or even of Aileen’s life. Everyone still talks about how Charlize “went ugly” for this role, but the biggest transformation here isn’t aesthetic, it’s physical – the way Theron replicates Wuernos’ mannerisms, way of speaking, and physicality. That’s why she won the Oscar. I also love that Jenkins calls the film “Monster” (which everyone labels Aileen), but then actually uses it to tell the story of how she fell in love with a woman when she was at her lowest, and that saved her. That’s kind of beautiful, and I’m glad I re-watched it so that I could see the story in that light, instead of the general memory I had of it being a good, feel-bad movie. It’s so much more than that.

15. Water Lilies (2007) dir. Céline Sciamma – Sciamma’s screenwriting and directorial debut, the first in her trilogy on youth, is as painfully beautiful as its sequels (Tomboy and Girlhood). It’s also one of the rare films that explores the overlap of queerness and girl friendships.

16. The Trouble with Angels (1966) dir. Ida Lupino – Movies about shenanigan-based female friendships are such rare delights. Rosalind Russel is divine as Mother Superior, and Hayley Mills as “scathingly brilliant” as the pranks she plays on her. Ida Lupino’s skill as an editor only enhances her directing, providing some truly iconic visual gags to complement dialogue snappy enough for Gilmore Girls.

17. Vagabond (1985) dir. Agnès Varda – Shot with a haunting realism, this film has no qualms about its heroine’s inevitable, unceremonious death, which it opens with, matter-of-factly, before retracing her final (literal) steps to the road-side ditch she ends up in. (I’m partly convinced said heroine was the inspiration for Sarah Manning in Orphan Black.)

18. One Sings, The Other Doesn’t (1977) dir. Agnès Varda – Probably my favorite classic Varda, this film feels incredibly personal. It’s essentially a love story about two best friends with very different lives. For an indie made in the ‘70s, the diversity, scope, and themes of the film are impressive. Even if the second half a drags a bit, the first half is absolute perfection, engaging the viewer immediately, and clipping along, sprinkling in some great original songs that were way progressive for their time (about abortion, female bodily autonomy, etc) and could still be considered “bangers” today.

19. Emma (2020) dir. Autumn de Wilde

20. Black Panthers (1969) dir. Agnès Varda

21. Into the Forest (2016) dir. Patricia Rozema - When the world was ending (i.e. the pandemic hit) this was the first movie I turned to - a quiet, meditative story of two sisters (Elliot Page and Evan Rachel Wood) surviving off the land after a sudden global blackout. Four years later, it’s still one of my favorite book-to-screen adaptations. I fondly remember speaking with director Patricia Rozema at the 2016 Chicago Critics Film Festival after a screening, her love for the source material and desire to “get it right” so apparent. I assured her then, and reaffirm now, that she really did.

22. City of Trees (2019) dir. Alexandra Swarens

23. Never Rarely Sometimes Always (2020) dir. Eliza Hittmann - To call this a harrowing and deeply personal journey of a sixteen-year-old who must cross state lines to get an abortion would be accurate, but incomplete. It is a story so much bigger than that, about the myriad ways women’s bodies and boundaries are constantly violated.

24. Paradise Hills (2019) dir. Alice Waddington

25. *Eve’s Bayou (1996) dir. Kasi Lemmons – I’ve been meaning to watch Kasi Lemmons’ directorial debut for many years now, and I’m so glad I finally have, because it fully deserves its icon status, beyond being one of the first major films directed by a black woman. Baby Jurnee Smollett's talent was immediately recognizable, and she has reminded us of it in Birds of Prey and Lovecraft Country this year. If merit was genuinely a factor for Oscar contenders, she would have taken home gold at eleven years old. Beasts of the Southern Wild has been one of my all-time favorites, but now I realize that most of my appreciation for that movie actually goes to Lemmons for blazing the trail with her story of a young black girl from the bayou first. It’s also a surprisingly dark story about memory and abuse and familial relationships that cross lines - really gutsy and surprising themes, especially for the ‘90s.

26. Blow the Man Down (2019) dir. Bridget Savage Cole & Danielle Krudy - Come and get your sea shanty fix!

27. Touchy Feely (2013) dir. Lynn Shelton - R.I.P. :(

28. Hannah Gadsby: Douglas (2020) dir. Madeleine Parry - If you thought Gadsby couldn’t follow up 2018′s sensational Nanette with a comedy special just as sharp and hilarious, you would have been sorely mistaken.

29. Girlhood (2013) dir. Céline Sciamma

30. Breathe (2014) dir. Mélanie Laurent

31. *A Dry White Season (1989) dir. Euzhan Palcy

32. Laggies (2014) dir. Lynn Shelton

33. *The Old Guard (2020) dir. Gina Prince-Bythewood – Everything I’ve ever wanted in an action movie: Immortal gays, Charlize Theron wielding a labrys (battle axe), kinetic fight choreography I haven’t seen since the last Bond movie…Watched it twice, then devoured the comics it was adapted from, and I gotta say: in the hands of black women, it eclipses the source material. Cannot wait for the just-announced sequel.

34. Morvern Callar (2002) dir. Lynn Ramsay

35. Shirley (2020) dir. Josephine Decker

36. *Radioactive (2019) dir. Marjane Satrapi – The story is obviously well worth telling and the narrative structure – weaving in the future consequences of Curie’s discoveries – is clever, but a bit awkwardly executed and overly manipulative. There are glimpses of real brilliance throughout, but it feels as if the director’s vision was not fully realized, to my great disappointment. Nonetheless, I appreciated seeing Marie Curie's story being told by a female director and embodied by the always wonderful Rosamund Pike.

37. *The Half of It (2020) dir. Alice Wu - I feel like a real scrooge for saying this, but this movie did nothing for me. Nothing about it felt fresh, authentic or relatable. A real disappointment from the filmmaker behind the wlw classic Saving Face.

38. Mouthpiece (2018) dir. Patricia Rozema - I am absolutely floored. One of those films that makes you fall in love with the art form all over again. Patricia Rozema continues to prove herself one of the most creatively ambitious and insightful directors of our time, with this melancholic meditation on maternal grief and a woman’s duality.

39. Summerland (2020) dir. Jessica Swale - The rare period wlw love story that is not a) all-white or b) tragedy porn. Just lovely.

40. *The Last Thing He Wanted (2020) dir. Dee Rees – As rumored, a mess. Even by the end, I still couldn’t tell you who any of the characters are. Dee, we know you’re so much better than this! (see: Mudbound, Pariah)

41. *Cuties (2020) dir. Maïmouna Doucouré – I watched this film to 1) support a black woman director who has been getting death threats for her work and 2) see what all the fuss is about. While I do think there were possibly some directorial choices that could have saved quite a bit of the pearl-clutching, overall, I didn’t find it overly-exploitative or gross, as many (who obviously haven’t actually watched the film) have labeled it. It certainly does give me pause, though, and makes me wonder whether children can ever be put in front of a camera without it exploiting or causing harm to them in some way. It also makes one consider the blurry line between being a critique versus being an example. File this one under complicated, for sure.

42. A Call to Spy (2019) Lydia Dean Pilcher – An incredible true story of female spies during WWII that perfectly satisfied my itch for British period drama/spy thriller and taught me so much herstory I didn’t know.

43. Kajillionaire (2020) dir. Miranda July - I was lucky enough to attend the (virtual) premiere of this film, followed by an insightful cast/director Q&A, which only made me appreciate it more. July's offbeat dark comedy about a family of con artists is queerer and more heartfelt than it has any right to be, and a needed reprieve in a year of almost entirely white wlw stories. The family's shenanigans are the hook, but it's the budding relationship between Old Dolio (an almost unrecognizable Evan Rachel Wood) and aspiring grifter Melanie (the luminous Gina Rodriguez) that is the heart of the story.

44. Misbehaviour (2020) dir. Philippa Lowthorpe – Again, teaching me herstory I didn’t know, about how the Women’s Liberation Movement stormed the 1970 Miss World Pageant. Keira Knightley and Gugu Mbatha-Raw’s characters have a conversation in a bathroom at the end of the film that perfectly eviscerates well-meaning yet ignorant white feminism, without ever pitting women against each other - a feat I didn’t think was possible. I also didn’t think it was possible to critique the male gaze without showing it (*ahem Cuties, Bombshell, etc*), but this again, invents a way to do it. Bless women directors.

45. *All In: The Fight for Democracy (2020) dir. Liz Garbus and Lisa Cortes – 2020’s 13th. Thank god for Stacey Abrams, that is all.

46. *The 40-Year-Old Version (2020) dir. Radha Blank – This scene right here? I felt that in my soul. This whole film is so good and funny and heartfelt and relatable to any artist trying to walk that tightrope of “making it” while not selling their soul to make it. My only initial semi-note was that it’s a little long, but after hearing Radha Blank talk about how she fought for the two-hour run-time as a way of reclaiming space for older black women, I take it back. She’s right: Let black women take up space. Let her movie be as long as she wants it to be. GOOD FOR HER.

47. Happiest Season (2020) dir. Clea Duvall - Hoooo boy. What was marketed as the first lesbian Christmas rom-com is actually a horror movie for anyone who’s ever had to come out. Throw in casual racism and a toxic relationship treated as otp, and it’s YIKES on so many levels. Aubrey Plaza, Dan Levy, and an autistic-coded Jane are the only (underused) highlights.

48. *Monkey Beach (2020) dir. Loretta Todd

49. *Little Chief (2020) dir. Erica Tremblay – A short film part of the 2020 Red Nation Film Festival, it’s a perfect eleven minutes that I wish had gone on longer, if only to bask in Lily Gladstone in a leading role.

50. First Cow (2019) dir. Kelly Reichardt – I know Kelly Reichardt’s style, so I’ll admit-- even as I was preparing for an excellent film, I was also reaching for my phone, planning on only half paying attention during all the inevitable 30-second shots of grass blowing in the wind. (And yes, there are plenty of those.) But twenty minutes in, my phone was set aside and forgotten, as I am getting sucked into this beautiful story about two frontiersman trying to live their best domestic life.There is only one word to describe this film and that is: PURE. I’ve never seen such a tender platonic relationship between men on screen before, and it’s not lost on me that it took a woman to show us that tenderness. Reichardt gives us two men brought together by fate, and kept together by a shared dream and the simple pleasure of not being alone in such a hard world; two men who spend their days cooking, trapping, baking, and dreaming of a better life; two men who don’t say much, but feel everything for each other. The world would be a much better place if men showed us this kind of vulnerability and friendship toward each other. Oh, and it’s also a brutal take-down of capitalism and the myth of the American Dream!

51. Wonder Woman 1984 (2020) dir. Patty Jenkins - My most-anticipated film for the past two years was...well, a mixed bag, to say the least. Too many thoughts on it for a blog post, so stay tuned for the upcoming podcast ep where we go all in ;)

52. *Selah and the Spades (2019) dir. Tayarisha Poe

I hope this gives you some ideas to kick off your new year with a resolution to support more female directors!

What were your favorite women-directed movies of last year? Let me know in the tags, comments, or asks!

#finally finished this #52 films by women #2020 #writing #movies #movie reviews #orig

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nuclear-satan · 3 years

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Final Space Season 3 Episode 1 Review **SPOILER WARNING!!**

...And Into The Fire we go!

I really have wanted to do a Final Space review for a while, so now - I'm going to do it, fuck it. Starting a couple episodes late, but after [insert shenanigans] I needed to let it cool off before getting back into it.

One last warning: THESE ARE NOT SPOILER FREE REVIEWS. DO NOT READ IF YOU ARE NOT SPOILED AND DO NOT WANT TO BE. THESE ARE GOING TO HAVE SOME SUMMARIZATION INVOLVED.

With the disclaimer out of the way, let's get into it.

So, first of all, I have to acknowledge that this cold open? Fucking toasty. The entire first five or six minutes of this episode is flat out amazing and some of the best that Final Space is. Really intense - I love the dramatic cold open to a space chase.

Also, however, brief, the Quinnary reunion was nice. Quinnary is a ship that I enjoy subjectively more than objectively, but considering it really hits now even if S1 had issues... I can look past it yo.

Invictus proves his power and intimidation incredibly well this episode, between the Gary Zombies and even this first incredibly terrifying matchup - even Mooncake, who in any other situation has been able to zap it away, couldn't touch it. Really setting the villain well.

Small thing I want to acknowledge because there was some discourse on it -- Sheryl saying "I'm his mother; where do you think he got it from?" Was really nice to me. Obviously not all is forgiven, nor should it be, but it's just a nice bit of character development.

Then, Ava gets Yeeted by Bolo and breaks.

I could have taken a better screencap probably, but I will not.

Anyways, considering the cast of characters was way too fucking big in S2, I'm not... particularly aggrieved by this, especially since I didn't really like AVA anyways, but it is pretty unfortunate that one of the only female characters just got the ax without basically any development other than the obligatory robot comphet stuff. Whatever, I think this is setting the stage for HUE AI, so I'll bite my tongue.

That said, the conversation that HUE and AVA had before she died? Sweet.

And then they're in Final Space. Goddamn, they really went the extra mile animating and illustrating this episode. Gotta acknowledge it.

Also, quick note: New OP is a banger.

...And this is when the review's going to start getting a bit more negative, because we jump straight into everyone's favorite trope: a time skip.

I. I really have issues with this timeskip. This episode was fucking ballistic in the pacing, and I really, really wish that I could have spent some more time within Final Space just trying to survive. I get it. It was a premiere, so you wanted to go all out, but... I really wish we could have savored it. There's just suddenly a timeskip! We don't get to see how they've been surviving. We don't get to see shit. Quinn just suddenly appears in a new outfit, and then we're off the races.

I dunno man, I really had issues with the pacing of this episode, and this is the backbone of it. It's okay to take a breather, even in your opening episode. You have to know when to take a breather. This episode sorely needed it, and it didn't get it.

Also, obligatory Danger Groins mention. Yeah, I know that's not what he says. It's what he says in my heart, tho.

From here, the Gary zombies show up, which are... admittedly intimidating.

They get attacked, and - okay, can we fucking mention the titan fights for a moment? No matter what happens this season, I'm here for this. This is Gurren Lagann levels of ridiculous, and I fucking love it. Smash that planet, yo.

lThey get separated, and Avocato and Gary have a bit unfitting but fucking hilarious moment that has to be acknowledged. This shit ain't straight, yo. There's no fucking way you tell me this shit is straight.

And... *sigh* I really have some goddamn issues with the next... I don't know, I wasn't watching, six minutes?

"There's no more grossout scenes," we were told. "Season 2 gross out is done. No more weird fetishes."

Okay.

Okay, sure.

I'm sparing you the images, because I don't want to post grossout on my blog, but... holy shit, Quatronostro's birth scene. First of all, which of the fuckers on the blog keeps putting their fetishes in this show? Clarence is gone, so you're making Mpreg Tribore (I realize Tribore is canonically genderfluid, but he's male presenting at the time of this birth... and at every time... I don't have faith in two cishet men to actually make good on that, sorry. I hope I'm wrong.) Stop it. Stop it. Stop it.

The scene is gross, uncomfortable grossout. This isn't the 90s anymore!

Also, the other thing I have to acknowledge - that motherfucking robot. It's season 3 - haven't we moved past the screaming = funny leftover humor from Olan's YouTube days? Clearly fucking not.

Also, Ash did a really out of character thing this episode by shooting the robot. I... what is Ash's character, exactly? Ash is an inconsistent enigma. Someone define that poor girl's character, already.

After that... mess.... though, we do end up with a very solid ending. Bolo headbutts the planet, Quinn and Gary get swept up in the blast, and we end up with a very beautiful but quick scene of Gary and Quinn embracing one last time - it's very reminiscent of chapter 9, and I did thoroughly enjoy it.

iAlso, the shot of Mooncake saying "Gar" while looking for Gary, presuming he's dead? Oh, that just hurts.

And then we end with HUE saying, "We are alone, Gary." Honestly, genuinely was a little disappointed to find it wasn't just HUE and Gary. I thought this line was going to come later in the season, and it was just going to be HUE and Gary in a callback from season one. It wasn't, and I'm genuinely very disappointed as someone who's favorite dynamic in the entire show is S1 HUE and Gary. Of course, as a result, I'm not unbiased, and... well, I do stan Quinn too.

And goddamn, look at the Earth. She got fucked uuuuuup. I think I remember hearing next episode that there's only one survivor left, which I do NOT buy as a concept, but it's very cool to see a show that does not shy away from full apocalypse scale destruction of the earth. It like, never happens, so it's a nice subversion. Get fucked, earth.

Overall Thoughts:

This episode is the definition of a mixed bag. The beginning is fantastic and the ending is solid (even if personally disappointing), but the middle is genuinely kind of bad. The pacing is rough, there's season 2 tier grossout that I did NOT need to see, and that robot deserved a punt in the face.

The animation is fantastic though. Everyone point and stare at the animation.

I still think the good outweighed the bad, though - if only because of my personal attachment to the characters. I think this was a decent episode - probably on par with the other openers... actually, I don't know.

My disappointment with this episode was more than with the Toro Regatta, but that was more due to my own expectations and thus not fair to rank it that way. I don't know - all the first episodes of the seasons are meh at best, and this unfortunately due to the lackluster middle fit that mold as well.

If you asked me to give it a ranking, I'd probably say if we assume a 5 out of 10 is average, I'd give it a 6. Decent, fantastic when it's good, but the entire middle section really brought me out of it and because of that I can't give it anything more than that.

I've heard episodes two and three are good, though - excited to see the Ventrexian for myself after all the fuss, so let's see how it holds up!

I'm scared for Biskit tho.

#Final space #final space spoilers #Final Space Season 3 #Final Space Review #Review #gary goodspeed #avocato #quinn ergon #quinnary #hue #bolo #AVA

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the-resurrection-3d · 3 years

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so what was ever good about acotar anyway?

For some reason, I’ve been very tempted to reread ACOTAR lately, and so I’m going to just make a quick list of what I remember specifically endearing the book to me back when I first read it in 2016 so we can compare notes later. This will, however, also include some retroactive criticisms now that we’re four years on from ACOWAR ruining everything forever.

Twigger warnings for discussions of abuse, csa and neglect, as well as me using my complimentary R Slur Pass.

For some context:

>Be 18yr me in 2016.

>Be in your first semester at college.

>Be so fed up with YA romance that you avoid books just for hinting at them in the summary.

>Be also brainstorming a series with your roommate called The Cuckmaster Saga.

This is probably going to sound embarrassing, but I’m being completely sincere when I say that part of why this book excited me was simply the novelty of finding a YA romance book that I liked.

I’d fallen out hard with YA in general by this point in my life, partially because of a string of fairy tale “retellings” that clearly gave zero fucks about the source material beyond using the iconography in its marketing. Folklore had been my special interest for a while, and my excitement for the series and all its little extra niche references coincided with finally getting to study folklore in a true academic setting.

Which leads me to point one:

I love the idea of combining BatB and the Tam Lin ballad. I know some people have complained about this, but honestly, I enjoyed finding a retelling that mimicked the mix-and-match structuring of a lot of folktales. ACOTAR isn’t even the messiest or least coherent mash-up by a huge margin. Unfortunately, this aspect of the series severely lessened as it went along — remember when we all thought ACOWAR was going to be a Snow White retelling and then there was just one scene with poisoned apples? Lmao.

[If anyone wants an author who does YA mash-ups that are actually YA, I’d recommend Rosamund Hodge, whose books are always interesting in their sheer weirdness even when the story itself slightly falters. I mean, I wrote a whole 20-page thesis on her Red Riding Hood/Maiden Without Hands retelling and still didn’t cover everything I had thoughts on. (Tragically, however, I must inform you all that she is a Catholic Reylo. Rest in pepperoni.)]

It is fucking hilarious in retrospect that SJM clearly knows a bunch of different folktales and folkloric creatures but thinks it’s believable for shadowsinger powers to have no theorized origin “even [in] the rich lore of the warrior-people” (ACOFAS 65). Bro fuck outta here.

But this leads into point two — Feyre and her family. It’s very obvious that SJM based Nesta and Elain’s dynamic with Feyre off the common folktale trope of having the youngest sibling be the only competent person in the room (and Katniss Everdeen). I thought it was honestly a lot of fun to see this trope done with some interiority; you can practically hear Feyre seethe about what useless hoes her sisters are between every line. I genuinely giggled through these parts on my initial readthrough.

I’ve seen some people complain that Nesta and Elain’s behaviors aren’t realistic in this situation, but au contraire! Nesta and Elain’s actions in book one are (...almost) perfectly realistic. Without revealing too much, my grandmother grew up in poverty with a few older sisters, and yet my great-grandmother would make her do all the work and constantly force her to give up her possessions (like her car) to the older sisters whenever they wanted them. Even to this day, when they’re all in their 70s and 80s, one of these sisters still relies on my grandma to do basic shit like balancing her checkbooks. I’ve also observed similar dynamics play out plenty of times between an adult child and an overindulgent parent, with people literally ruining their lives and bodies all for the sake of sitting at home all day buying furry porn off the internet.

Nesta and Elain are basically the psychology of this type of person split in two — Elain the soft, delicate, perpetually victimized front they put on for the world, and Nesta the ice-cold, bitter, and aggressive bitch they truly are.

Honestly, the only thing I would change about this set-up is either keep Ma Archeron alive or give Papa Archeron more personality than a plank of damp wood. What’s truly missing here is a parental figure enforcing this fucked up dynamic — I don’t remember it being clear that Feyre’s always had this role, just that she took it on after her mom’s death. Making it clear that Feyre’s always been forced to be this way — alongside giving the mom more characterization — would have gone a long way towards making this dynamic feel more realized and less like the narrative using trauma and pity as a shortcut towards reader engagement.

Then again, that would require SJM to have a female villain in this series who isn’t a rapist, and quotes I’ve seen floating around from ACOSF make it pretty clear SJM doesn’t know same-gender sexual abuse even exists.

Anyway.

Point Three (or rather 2B): Feyre realizing she doesn’t have to hang around her family just because she feels obligated to love them was a fucking banger. I loved it so much; having a story, especially a YA story, that showed you aren’t obligated to love a family that treats you like shit was so special to me. Especially since I was also leaving my family for the first time, and going home to visit them every other weekend felt like being hit point-blank with a Psyduck blast.

Thankfully, my relationship with my family has gotten a lot better, but I’m still really disappointed that Nesta and Elain were forced back into the story, rather than them reaching out to Feyre and making amends because they wanted to do better. The closest we got to this was the revelation that Nesta almost made it to the Border by herself after Feyre was taken, which was definitely badass, but also unfortunately the only Nesta scene I’ve liked in this entire fucking series. If SJM was going to force Feyre to regress into being Nesta and Elain’s tardwrangler again, then she should have followed up on Amren’s line in ACOWAR that Feyre treats Nesta and Elain the way Tamlin treated her.

“I asked them to help once—and look what happened. I won’t risk them again.”

Amren snorted. “You sound exactly like Tamlin.”

[. . .] and I said, “She’s right.” (169-170).

But I’m sure everyone who’s read ACOSF knows how well that’s going.

Point Four: the femindhjdfhfdh I can’t even write that with a straight face. I mean let’s be real, I too enjoy seeing female characters I like become queens and all that other stuff, but it was clear to me even on my initial reading of ACOMAF that it was all shallow and designed to help delineate good guys from bad guys without much in the way of nuance. It certainly took me out of the experience a little, but at least it ties into the books’ themes of recovering from abuse and shacking up with a Certified Women Respecter.

My actual point four: Truthfully I only bought this series for the meme of having the first shitty love interest getting cucked in the second book. ACOWAR gave me some complicated feelings on Tamlin, and I honestly think he should have just stopped appearing in the series after that — BUT, having him be dragged back in once per book just to call him a cuck and cockslap him around a little bit is fucking hilarious. Pointless! But hilarious.

I also think that this kind of arc is a great critique of the standard “happily ever after,” acknowledging that in real life, you’re much more likely to just pass from one abusive household to another because you don’t know what healthy love, communication, and boundaries are. (Arguably many folktales are the fantasies of women who are well aware of this reality but want to imagine a world that’s otherwise). I definitely have a lot of problems with SJM’s claims of “sex positivity,” but acknowledging that Feylin used sex as a means of avoiding communication was another great touch.

I wish that this whole King of Hybern shit was completely cut just to focus on these themes more; it’s very clear SJM only included it because fantasy series = BIG EPIC WORLD-ENDING STAKES!! I've read maybe ten pages of Throne of Glass, so I can't speak for how she handles epic fantasy there, but I know for me and a lot of other stans, the Hybern plot had licherally nothing to do with what we liked and connected to in these books.

But I must soften here, because I totally empathize with feeling like big stakes are “necessary” for a fantasy story and that no one would want to read your books without them. YA fantasy is the reason why TV Tropes coined the term “romantic plot tumor,” after all. (Source: I’m making shit up.)

What else… what else… uhhhhh. I think that might be it, at least for substantial things I don’t have to qualify too much. I of course have plenty of little things I used to like but have now been tainted because ACOWAR ruined everything forever and ACOFAS danced on the graves (such as how I liked Lucien but everyone in the books shits on him now to the point it’s stopped being funny). But this post is too long anyway.

#long post #anti sjm #abuse tw #csa tw #r slur #neglect tw #what's been eating feyre archeron?

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freddiesaysalright · 5 years

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Peace Like A River Part 1

A Gwilym Lee x Reader Story

Summary: Reader is a stand up comic with a pretty dark past. She has a three new lights in her life: her daughter, Violet; her anonymous correspondent, Dear Friend; and Gwilym Lee.

Word Count: 3.4K

Tag List: @psychosupernatural @someone-get-a-medic @bensrhapsody @deakyclicks If you’d like to be added, let me know!

A/N: Sorry this took so long! I had like the snippet of an idea for this and then needed more for a plot, but I think I’ve finally got it together lol. Hope y’all like it!

Part I here we go!!!

Grinning, you read over the letter once more from backstage. His words in that graceful, loopy handwriting warmed you from your heart to your toes. You sighed contentedly, stuffed the paper into your back pocket for luck, and waited for your cue.

“Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome to the stage, Y/N Y/L/N!” the host cried.

You shook out the last of your nerves and walked out on the stage, waving and grinning at the huge crowd that stood and applauded for you. You had never done a show for an audience this large and it was both intimidating and exhilarating.

“Thank you!” you said, as you waited for them to stop cheering. “Thank you. Thank you all for coming. Really, I appreciate it because whenever I have to go out and do things, I think about killing myself.”

A nervous titter went through the crowd and you smiled again.

“Seriously, I do. I’ll think about killing myself over nothing. Like, the other day, I was in the car on my way home from the store and my sister called me and asked me to stop by her place and help her and her husband move furniture. And I actually thought ‘If I crashed my car right now and died, I wouldn’t have to go move any fucking furniture.’”

They laughed.

“It’s crazy, I know, but I casually think about it any time I’m even minorly inconvenienced. But what stops me from doing it - like, my next line of thought - is something equally meaningless. Like, in that scenario with my sister, the thing that held me back was like, I thought ‘But fuck, Bohemian Rhapsody is coming out in like two months and I really wanna see that.’”

A couple cheers came through the laughter and you smiled.

“Oh, we got some Queen fans in here tonight?” you said.

More cheers.

“Yeah, cheer, clap, fuck yeah!”

A swell of shouts and whistles went through the crowd and you joined them.

“Fuck yeah, y’all were raised right,” you said when it settled down. “Queen is a great band. Just four sexy dudes making banger after banger. They’re legitimately my favorite band. I’m not gonna lie, they really got me through some shit, but we’ll come back to my trauma later.”

You paused for a small bit of laughter.

“Now normally, I don’t like when comedians talk about Queen. And by that, I mean, I don’t like it when comedians talk about Freddie Mercury,” you said. “And it’s not for some pretentious reason like they’re not real fans or something. It’s literally just that when people joke about Freddie Mercury, they joke about the same two things - his teeth and his sexuality - two extremely fucking boring things to joke about.”

You took a sip of water.

“Not only are they boring, they’re just rude. Like, these are things this man was born with and couldn’t change about himself - he had no control over that. What he did have control over - the fucking ridiculous lyrics of Under Pressure.”

A giggle went through them. You smiled.

“I’m serious. Have any of you ever looked up the lyrics to that song? Most of it doesn’t really bother me, it’s just those weird scat-like shit Freddie does between verses. Like, they have these great, meaningful lines followed by Freddie going ‘Um, bah, bah, bay.’ What the fuck?”

They laughed.

“That shit is in the official lyrics of that legendary song and I think about that every goddamn day. That and fucking ‘dee, dah, day - ok!’ Shit like that is how you know these dudes were on drugs. One of those guys came up with that, pitched it to four other people - if not more - and they all went ‘fuckin genius’ and bam! Under Pressure is one of the greatest hits of all time.”

They laughed harder.

“I guess I’m not as disturbed by that as I am by the fact that the people ate it up like they did. It’s one thing for those guys to say it’s genius, but then for us as the public to say it as well just fucks me up. The first time I heard that song I was like ‘what the cinnamon toast fuck am I listening to?’ Shit was weird.”

You took another drink as they laughed.

“But honestly, I don’t understand why people go for Freddie’s sexuality when there are clearly much more roastable things to talk about. I don’t care how rich and famous he was, if you’re a straight white guy making fun of gay brown guy for being either or both of those things, you’re punching down, dude, and that’s not comedy, that’s just being an asshole.”

For that, they applauded. You continued on through your set, and this audience was great for you. They were responsive and you held their attention throughout. You were almost ready to close the show.

“I always like to end my shows with the most important person in my life,” you said. “I’ve talked about her already tonight, and she’s my daughter, Violet.”

The tech guys put a picture of her up on the projector behind you. You beamed at it.

“That’s her. She’s three years old and she’s my everything. She’s the reason I get on stage and in front of cameras. She’s the real reason I don’t crash my car to get out of moving furniture.”

With one final laugh, you bid them goodnight. You took a little bow at the roar of applause and smiled widely. You said a few more thank yous before the spotlight dimmed and you walked off stage to the sound of cheering and clapping. It never ceased to amaze you how far you had come.

Someone took the mic for you as your assistant approached. She was a recent hire, and something you initially resisted. But now that your name and brand had grown, you really did need the help. Her name was Stacy, and she was incredibly efficient. You liked her, as did Violet, which sold you on hiring her.

“Great show,” she said with a smile. “Vi is asleep in the green room. We’ve got a couple VIP guests for you to meet before we take you both back to the hotel.”

“Alright, lead the way,” you replied.

You followed her to another room backstage where you saw a group of men. Most of them had their back to you, but one face, you recognized. Gwilym Lee, who you considered a friend, even though you hadn’t spoken in a while.

Before you had really thrown yourself into standup, you did a bit of acting. You and Gwilym shot a pilot of a sitcom that unfortunately never aired, but while filming, you had become really close. You even felt like he was flirting with you a few times, but back then you were nowhere near ready to start a new relationship, so you’d kept things strictly platonic. Nowadays, you mostly liked each others pictures on Instagram as your main form of communication. But life was busy for both of you. You were on tour and he had gone on to films.

You started to smile but then froze when the man next to Gwilym turned his head. You grabbed Stacy’s arm harshly.

“Holy shit is that Brian May?” you wondered.

She chuckled. “Yeah! The VIP guests are Queen and the cast of Bohemian Rhapsody.”

“Shut the fuck up!” you cried. “Really?!”

“Yep,” she assured you. “Go on in and say hello.”

Your stomach dropped with nerves. Again, you shook yourself free of them and donned your stage personality. Slipping into that mask was where you were most comfortable. While you talked about the things you had endured in your comedy, there it was lighthearted, and you did not have to face it head on. You could throw a joke out and dodge it.

“Well, hello!” you said brightly as you entered the room.

They all turned eyes on you and smiled as you were introduced. Brian May and Roger Taylor were without a doubt the most thrilling to shake hands with, but Rami Malek, Joe Mazzello, and Ben Hardy were also exciting. When it came time to shake hands with Gwilym, you offered a warm, friendly smile.

“It’s great to see you again,” you said. “It’s been two years or so now?”

“Just about,” he replied. “You were wonderful.”

“Thank you!”

“Gwil was the one who convinced us to come tonight,” Joe explained. “He said you were hilarious on set when you filmed before.”

“That’s sweet,” you replied. “It is a shame that show never took off, it was a good one.”

“I certainly loved it,” Gwilym said.

You chatted with them for a bit. They all were calming to be around. Brian and Roger were complimentary of your bit about Under Pressure, which eased some of your nerves about the set. Even though you were, you didn’t feel like you were putting on a show for them. In minutes, it felt like they were your friends.

The door opened shortly after and in walked Stacy, hand in hand with your very sleepy daughter. She clutched her stuffed dog close to her chest as she ran right to you and crawled into you lap. You wrapped your arms around her and held her close, kissing the top of her head. She eyed the guests warily.

“What are you doing awake, sweetie?” you asked gently, stroking her hair.

“She woke up for a little while,” Stacy explained. “I tried to get her back down but all she wanted was Mommy.”

You smiled. “That’s okay. You can have Mommy whenever you want her.”

She snuggled into your chest, turning her face away from the strangers.

“You don’t want to say hello?” you wondered, and she shook her head. You looked at the guys. “Sorry. She’s kinda shy.”

“That’s alright,” said Brian.

“She’s grown up,” Gwilym said. “Last time I saw her, she was just learning to walk.”

“Oh, yeah,” you remembered. “She actually walked right into you during a scene.”

You both chuckled at the memory.

“The director was almost mad, but she was so cute,” he continued.

He knelt down in front of you and gently touched her arm. She turned her face to just barely peek at him.

“Hi, Violet,” he said sweetly, smiling at her. “It’s been a while.”

Her brow furrowed.

“You were still a little baby,” you explained to her. “But you’ve met Gwilym before.”

She relaxed and looked between you and him.

“Daddy?” she questioned.

You stiffened and cleared your throat uncomfortably. Then shook your head.

“No, baby,” you told her. “No Daddy.”

She pouted at you and then hid her face again. You looked apologetically at Gwilym, who shrugged it off. He started to get up, but hesitated to pick something up off the ground. It was your letter that had been in your pocket. He held it out to you.

“Is this yours?” he asked.

You quickly took it, your face flushing with embarrassment. Even though there was no way he knew what it was, you still felt really shy about the whole situation.

“Yeah, thanks,” you said, not meeting his eyes as you stuffed it back into your pocket.

“A letter?” he questioned.

“Just some particularly touching fanmail,” you lied.

“Not enough people write letters anymore in my opinion,” said Roger.

“Why sit and write a letter when you can send a text?” Ben replied. “It’s much faster.”

“Yeah, but I sort of miss the anticipation involved in letter writing,” Brian said in agreement with his bandmate.

You continued to visit with them as Violet slowly fell asleep again against you. For a while, you felt Gwilym’s eyes on you intensely. His expression was odd. It appeared he thought he knew something more about you. It made you shift in your seat a few times before at last, he seemed to let go of whatever question was burning in his mind.

They visited for about another half hour before you really did need to get back to your hotel, and so did they. You said fond farewells to all of them, reassured them that you would see the movie, and then it came to Gwilym.

“We’re in New York for a few days,” he said. “Let me know if you’d like to get coffee or something and catch up.”

“That would be great,” you replied with a smile.

You gave him a side hug since you had Violet on your hip, sleeping soundly. Her stuffed dog slipped from her hand but Gwil caught it before it hit the ground and handed it to you.

“Can’t have that,” he said lightly.

“Thank you,” you returned, taking it. You looked at all of them. “Have a wonderful night, guys. It was so great chatting with you.”

They all bid you one final farewell. Gwilym was the last to leave and you shared a lingering look with him before he closed the door. You continued to stare at the spot where he disappeared, realizing now how much you had missed him these last couple years.

“Ready to go to bed?” Stacy asked.

With a yawn, you nodded, and she ordered an Uber to take all three of you back to the hotel you were staying in. It wasn’t far from the venue, since you would be doing three shows there this week before moving on Boston. Stacy eyed you with an odd smirk as you stared out the car window. Finally, you looked at her.

“What is it?” you asked, a bit snappier than you intended.

“You and Gwilym Lee seemed to have a little something going on,” she said with a sly smirk.

You rolled your eyes. “We just knew each other a couple years ago. Besides, you know I’m...involved with someone.”

“Ah, right,” she said, rolling her eyes now. “The ever elusive Dear Friend.”

“Hey, if anyone’s elusive, it’s me,” you said. “I was the one who made the arrangement what it is.”

“Y/N, you write letters to some mystery man,” she replied. “He could be anyone. Gwilym Lee is a real person and right in front of you.”

“Dear Friend is a real person,” you argued. “I’ve just never met him.”

“And yet you’re convinced he’s your soulmate,” she returned. “I just don’t get it. How can you fall in love with someone through paper?”

“You don’t understand,” you said. “You’ve never read his letters. He’s so...eloquent and smart. And I can be myself with him. I can share my deepest thoughts and desires without any fear of judgement. He does so with me as well. It’s a real connection. The strongest I’ve ever felt with anyone.”

“You don’t know anything real about each other,” she insisted. “Not your names, not your jobs, where you live-”

“Those things don’t matter,” you cut across her. “The real stuff is deeper than that. And that’s where Dear Friend and I meet.”

“Whatever,” she said dismissively, weary of having this discussion yet again. “You’ve got your family reunion on your last day in town. I suggest you find a man in person to go with you. If you show up without someone again, I think your mother will actually lose her mind.”

You considered this. She was right, your mother absolutely hounded you about your romantic life since Violet was born. You told her you weren’t ready since your marriage had left you so scarred. You didn’t tell her about Dear Friend, though, since you knew she could never understand something like that. Plus, you had only been corresponding for a year.

“I think Gwilym would go with you,” Stacy said, nudging you with her elbow.

“I was thinking more along the lines of hiring some actor to be my boyfriend,” you replied. “I don’t want to expose Gwilym to my family. He’s been nothing but nice to me.”

She chuckled. “At least take him up on the coffee. I really think you should explore your options in case this Dear Friend isn’t who he says he is.”

“I will take him up on the coffee,” you assured her. “But it’s not a date. In the meantime, find some poor struggling actor to go with me and get my mother off my back.”

“I’m on it,” she assured you, already looking through her phone to get started.

You reached the hotel at last. You took Violet to your room, bidding Stacy goodnight as she went to her room next door. You tucked your daughter into bed and kissed her on the forehead before heading over the desk. You pulled out the letter from Dear Friend that was still in your pocket and read it once more. Then you pulled out your stationery and pen to begin your reply. You were halfway through your letter when you remembered Gwilym.

You opened your phone and pulled up his number, which you had from your days of being coworkers. You opened up a text to send to him and found yourself blanking on what to say. You had written paragraphs to Dear Friend, but when it came to asking someone to get a simple cup of coffee, you had no idea how to phrase it. It made you all the more certain Dear Friend was your person. Words came easily when talking to him.

You went with your stage personality. You sent a casual, “Is tomorrow too soon for that coffee?” with a silly emoji. Then you returned to your letter. Gwilym texted back almost right away and suggested meeting around nine in the morning, which you agreed to. Then you finished writing your letter and sealed it in an envelope for Stacy to send off in the morning.

The letters always took some time. One thing you knew about Dear Friend was that he was from the UK. The PO box you sent the letters to was in London, but you could also tell from the way he spelled things. You often teased each other about these differences. So of course, they took longer to send and receive. But, you agreed with Brian May that the anticipation of getting one was one of the most exciting parts of the experience.

Another benefit of him being across the pond meant that your opportunities to meet were few. In fact, you hadn’t had one since you started writing. It was a bit of a relief. You knew you loved Dear Friend, but keeping him at arm’s (well, ocean’s) length felt safest. And after your brutal marriage to Violet’s father, Henry, being safe was of top priority for you. And yet, the desire to be with Dear Friend grew daily. It just terrified you to face the reality of it.

The next morning, you dropped the letter and Violet off with Stacy while you went to meet up with Gwilym. You went to a local coffee shop and ordered. You paid, and he protested, but you insisted, and assured him that he could get it next time. You grabbed a table and started talking. You told him you were still living in Los Angeles and that you were mostly doing shows out in California. You tended to avoid New York, since Henry and his friends and family were still there and he was still an NYPD officer. You couldn’t avoid it on tour, though, nor your family reunion. You told Gwilym about the reunion, but not the part about you ex-husband.

“You’re hiring someone?” he asked, baffled. “A stranger?”

“Yeah,” you said. “Some guy that was rejected from Broadway or something. I’ll pay him, and we’ll come up with a story for my mother, and then the next time I see her I’ll tell her how we tragically broke up.”

“That’s ridiculous,” he said with a laugh. “I’ll do it for you.”

You blinked. “You really don’t have to-”

“I don’t mind,” he said. “We’re friends. I know meeting strange men is difficult for you.”

Gwilym knew that Henry had abused you because you talked about it in your sets. You never got into gruesome detail, although you had confessed a few things to Dear Friend. You talked on stage about not dating because of what you had been through. It was extremely kind of Gwilym to offer this, and you weren’t sure how you could thank him. Your comedian mask slipped on again.

“I’m not sure I can afford your rates, Mr. Lee,” you teased.

“How much was my coffee?” he returned.

“Five dollars,” you told him.

“Well, it turns out, for friends, I offer a discounted price of five dollars,” he joked. “So, consider it payment for the coffee.”

Your brow furrowed. “Are you sure about this?”

“Really, it’s fine,” he reassured you. “It’s just one day.”

“I can’t tell you how grateful I am,” you said, seriously.

He raised a curious eyebrow at your tone.

“I mean, it’s just one of the nicest things,” you continued, blushing once again under his gaze. “You’re a very generous person, Gwilym.”

“Perhaps,” he said. “Or you’re just still getting used to kindness.”

You smiled, unwilling to go any deeper.

“Let’s chalk it up to a combination of both,” you said lightly.

You finished your coffees and headed to the door. He had to go to an interview and you were going to take Violet around the city since the weather was nice. As you hugged goodbye, you smiled up at him.

“See you Saturday?” you asked.

“Saturday,” he affirmed.

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jq37 · 5 years

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The Report Card -- Fantasy High Sophomore Year Ep 1

Sophomores and Spring Break

Note: Hey guys! I decided to try something a little bit different and slightly more structured than my usual recaps for FH: Sophomore Year. I’m hoping this will be a little easier for me and a more useful tool for keeping up to date since there will be a lot more eps to keep track of and they’ll be easier to miss. Lemme know what you think and if you want raw, unfiltered opinions on anything specific, feel free to send me an ask. I’m always down to go off about literally whatever.

We’re back, baby! It is Sophomore Year at Aguefort and the gang is on Spring Break. A lot is going down so lemme break it down. The Bad Kids, having defeated Kalvaxus last year, are all entitled to a share of his hoard and all the red tape is finally cleared so they all get 20k gold each (which is an insane amount of money converted to USD if you use the WOTC conversion rate of a gold coin being around $145 (circa 2006 when they answered the question)--which would be close to $330 with inflation). Jawbone and Sandra-Lynn are moving in after less than a year into a profoundly haunted house and it’s kind of a Full House situation because Adaine, Fig, Kristen, and Tracker all officially live there (plus it seems that Zayn has also anchored himself to Adaine’s tower--btw, Adaine took the tower that the haunted house obviously has) and you know all the other Bad Kids are gonna be there on the regular.

More importantly, Aguefort gives the gang their big project for the year--finding the crown of the Nightmare King which was stolen at the end of last season--which is worth 60% of their grade (Adaine does a full Hermione at this information). Each of the gang has info about the NK but the trail has mostly gone cold. Luckily, Fabian just got a hot tip about where Falinel is keeping Aelwyn and she seems like a pretty good lead to start with since she was super tied up in the bad side of all the messiness of last year. Adaine is displeased to say the least.

Going off to find the crown is super exciting story-wise for two reasons. First of all, it means the gang gets to hire, well, hirelings to help them and temporarily join the party! They ping basically every cool NPC they can think of (except for Tracker for some reason which is BONKERS because (1) she probably would have done it for free and cutting her in would still be keeping the money in the family, (2) she’s dope as hell, (3) she’s a cleric and the party can always use more healers, (4) she’s a werewolf so presumably she has skills that would help in the woods, and (5) they’re t r a c k i n g down a crown and the girl’s name is literally T R A C K E R, but I will not backseat D&D) and eventually end up with Ragh (who has been without an adventuring party all year, poor guy), Sandra-Lynn (swayed by a nat 20 rolled by Fig), Cathilda (!?) ,and, for some reason, Gilear (which Fabian is happy about, mainly for the opportunity to maybe bump him off on the way). Second of all, if you recall, Elmville is a pretty modern town but the rest of the continent is less fantasy high, more high fantasy. Horses and lanterns and all that pseudo-medieval goodness. They are gonna stick out like a sore thumb. I am very here for it.

Everyone goes home to rest up but, after some ominous dreams, only four of them wake up. Riz and Fig are left asleep and then Brennan mic drops and ends the episode which is a power move and I am extremely upset about it but also, respect. Right for the jugular immediately. I heard Murph and Emily are on tour in the UK next week which probably has something to do with this but, in the moment, I did not know that and I really felt the hammer drop in my heart. It was wild. Cannot wait to see where we go from here. Plus, who doesn’t love watching characters freak out because their friends are in danger?

Random Thoughts

I have no idea what the title of this episode is or if it’ll even have one and not a number but I gave it a placeholder one for now. I also don’t have access to the stream yet so I didn’t get to include some info I wanted to (like a record of nat 20s, and nat 1s so I can track their stats for the school year) and I probably missed some stuff because my brain can only hold so much info guys. I’m not Brennan.

I mentioned this yesterday during the stream, but there will never be anything better than the pure D&D joy of everyone, in character, talking over each other to clown on each other. They get the friend-group banter that’s a hair breadth’s away from bullying so true to life and it’s so fun to watch. On the flip side, the opening scene with everyone introducing themselves and affirmatively claiming each other as their best friends was also peak D&D. Found family= best trope.

Fig and Adaine burn spell-slots at basically the same time to try and beat each other to the best room in the (Scooby-Doo ass) house--which is exactly the kind of thing that would happen in this world. It’s such an intuitive setting. I love it so much. (BTW, Fig ends up staying in the false space under the revolving grand piano because, of course).

Fabian and Gorgug went to recruit Ragh, who assumed they were propositioning him for a three-way. In his defense, they did do it in a super proposition-y way and they were in the middle of the LGBTQ student union.

Also, Gorgug gives Ragh an inspiring speech about thinking you’re your own dad which makes him burst into tears.

Speaking of, Jawbone offhandedly says he’s poly but, like, based on some of the stuff he’s said, I feel like that’s not really a reveal. He also gets along well with Gorthalax and would be down w/ a three-way if Sandra-Lynn wanted to which, again, totally checks out.

Arthur Aguefort uses Chronomancy to rewind time and catch a snide comment Adaine made under her breath, which is exactly the kind of frivolous use of God-like power I’d expect from him.

I really love Adaine’s energy coming into this season. She’s in therapy. She’s in a good home environment. She’s comfortable enough with her friend group to do stuff like prank Fig (love that they’re gonna be living together now). And she’s good friends with Zayn now which I want to see more of based on their one interaction in this ep which was very cute. I am already on record as saying I would be down with her getting a ghost boyfriend--I mean, for the aesthetic alone--but I’d be happy with just more friendship.

Fabian is also hilarious this season because you can tell he’s gone a bit soft from having friends and leaning into that (the friendship necklace with Riz) but also he’s fully aware that it’s happening so he’s, like, ping-ponging back and forth like, “These are my friends,” and, “What am I saying? I used to be cool,” and it’s very funny. Very happy the Aelwyn storyline is happening right out of the gate, both because I think Aelwyn is a very interesting character with a lot of potential for nuance but also because Fabian reacting to her and Adaine reacting to Fabian reacting to her is always gold.

Prompted by an offhand conversation from Fig about rock and roll, Brennan--earning another feather for his Cap of God Tier DMing--goes on an impromptu five minute long improved diatribe about a bard who played such a good concert that it instantly impregnated everyone in attendance (dudes too) who gave birth to kids with sick rocker hair and denim jackets and ascended to Rock Heaven on their 18th Birthday. You truly have to watch it to believe it. At a certain point I thought he was gonna drop it but that was the moment he doubled down and kept going. Amazing.

Watching Murph, in real time, make up a girl/boy/whateverfriend in Fantasy Canada was a gift.

I don’t have access to the stream yet but best quote of the night that I can remember is Kristen choosing her room: This is triggering and I’ll take it. (Her line about her lesbian starter kit and the one about wanting a horse were also bangers).

The group talks about what they’re going to do for transportation outside of Elmsville since they don’t really use cars out there and they somehow get from “disguise Fig’s tour bus” to “commission Aguefort to create a brand new animal that can hold six people plus hirelings, one of which is Fabian who is also riding his motorbike”.

I love that Sandra-Lynn’s Mom Powers work on Tracker.

Basrar doesn’t accept the invitation to come with on the quest, but he does give Kristen a bag of infinite ice cream sandwiches, which is basically just as good, IMO.

Oh Gilear. The man is sleeping in the Seacaster garage, being bullied by skater kids, and now he’s stuck on this quest with his ex and Fabian who actively wants him dead.

Speaking of, I’m psyched to see more of Sandra-Lynn. She was kind of a sleeper badass at the end of last season.

Ragh is keeping secrets which I hope the cast doesn’t forget because it could be nothing serious (like the high school drama happening with Skrank and the 7 maidens--maybe he’s just crushing on Gorgug who did full kiss him during Promocalypse) or it could be Serious Business that will blow up if the don’t stay on top of it. We’ll see.

Oh, almost forgot. Adaine wants an emotional support frog. Every time I think I can’t love her more.

Detention

Fig for Not Respecting Personal Boundaries

Fig goes full Emily right out the gate and, after finding out that Skrank (nerdy bird dude who apparently can get it) was not only dating Ostentasia (rich, popular dwarf) but also dumped her in pursuit of Danielle Barkstock (one of Ostentasia’s party members, the scandal), disguises herself as him with Danielle to figure out what’s going on. And, wouldn't you know it, when she gives herself away, Danielle immediately is shocked and appalled, as you would be, obviously. We also learn that she’s still catfishing Dr. Asha which is, how you say, for sure a crime. Fig, please, I’m begging you. Cease.

Honor Roll

Fig, Riz, and Adaine for Researching the Nightmare King

Fig made both lists, look at that. Wasn’t my plan for this to be a three-way tie (also didn’t expect to use the word “three-way” this many times in this writeup) but I think their contributions were pretty much equally valuable. Rainsolo on the Discord wrote up this summary of the lore dump Brennan gave them.

#fantasy high #fantasy high spoilers #dimension 20 #dimension 20 spoilers #the report card #report card

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smokeybrandreviews · 4 years

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Smokey brand Movie Reviews: Don’t Stop Me Now

This Wuha sh*t has me f*cked up but it’s been pretty legit with all the new release flicks on streaming. I’ve seen a ton of movies i missed in theaters here on my couch and it has been glorious. One i decided to skip because of all the little chil’lens was Sonic the Hedgehog. I’m a massive fan of the Sonic from way back when so i was concerned how this movie would be received, especially after that god-awful reveal initially. Dude had human teeth and it was horrifying. Paramount put it back in the cooker for a few months and popped out something a little more accurate, much to my surprise.This thing came out and blew up the theater market, also to my surprise. I couldn’t believe how accepted by the masses this thing was. Since it’s out on streaming now, i finally decided to check it out. After my first viewing, I have a few qualms but so much more to gush about.

The Good

First and foremost, thank god Paramount decided to shelve that original Sanic design. Goddamn was that hing creepy. This new one hits the sweet spot between Classic and Modern Sonic perfectly. F*cking good job.

Sonic the Hedgehog feels like an MCU Spider-Man film and i love. That opening sequence felt right in line with Tom Holland and his ridiculously lovable quips. When he hot me with that “great power” line, i almost sh*t myself.

The usage of the rings was surprisingly dope. When i saw their ability in the previews, i thought it might be stupid but, to my surprise, it was pretty interesting. No spoilers but it’s a nice plot device.

All of those game references are adorable. I mean, that Mushroom World reference, tho. Outstanding.

The contrasting themes of friendship and loneliness, while a little trite, are more than enough to give proper depth to a relatively shallow plot. There’s a ton of soul in this flick which i think is because of these particular themes and how they’re explored.

I have to say, this score is pretty legit. I thought we’d have something special with that opening Queen ballad but it just kind of kept coming with the bangers. did not expect that from a Sonic the Hedgehog adaption.

But that sound design, tho. I mean, the rings, Sonic’s spin dash, and even that little Green Hill remix; I loved al of it!

Ben Schwartz as Sonic is amazing. Dude fills those shoes perfectly. I grew up on the old cartoons with Urkel so dude had to bring the fury to impress and, boy, did he. Schwartz bring this effervescent, lovable energy to Sonic that immediately endears the blue blur to your heart.

James Marsden is quite charming as Thomas Wachowski. Dude is usually rather dry for my taste but i actually enjoy him in this. Dude has an absolutely brilliant chemistry with Schwartz and considering dude is a cartoon, that’s saying a lot. All hail Donut Lord!

Tika Sumpter was surprisingly hilarious as Maddie Wachowski, Tom’s wife. She has a very small amount of screen time but she kind of killed it when she was onscreen. I think she had potential going forward but it might be tricky giving her proper due in the future.

Jim Carrey is absolutely brilliant in his aggressive, manic, self. I miss this Carrey, that Mask/Ace Ventura Carrey. His Robtonik hits all of those nostalgia notes and i love it. I hope he returns for the sequel, if there’s a sequel. His Robotnik is mad insidious and i’d love to see what he can do in Mobius.

Shout out to Crazy Karl!

The Bad

Ugh. That Floss, tho. Really?

The plot to this flick is kind of generic. You’ve seen this buddy cop cartoon shtick before. Who Framed Roger Rabbit, The Iron Giant, Peter Rabbit, Bumblebee, the f*cking Smurfs; This type of flick might as will be a trope. Still, Sonic’s execution more than makes up for it’s pedestrian framing device.

The pacing of this movie is a little funky. The relationship between Tom and Sonic feels like they rushed through the necessary milestones but this movie is only a little over an hour and a half so i imagine expedience is necessary.

This is more a nitpick than anything because i actually really like this effect but the way they address Sonic’s super-speed isn’t anything new or innovative. It’s kind of just Quicksilver meets Blue Hedgehog but the way it’s executed is pretty dope.

Sonic is definitely a family film. It’s nothing heavy or super deep, but it is fun as hell. I’ve seen a lot of reviews kind of ding it because of that but i, personally, didn’t have a problem with it. Still, if you go into this looking for some super philosophical dive into the human condition or expect it to be as funny as a Chappelle standup, you’re going to be disappointed. I don’t think this is too terrible but it can be considering a limitation i guess? I dunno. I’m reaching for sh*t to dislike at this point.

The Verdict

Sonic the Hedgehog is one of the best video game adaptions i have ever to seen. I thought Detective Pikachu was the clear winner but this one gives it a real run for it’s money. It’s incredibly adorable, has fantastic performances, and genuine heart. Ben Schwartz give a life to sonic that rivals Jaleel White and i say that with all of the nostalgia i have for those old Sonic cartoons. Jim Carrey steals every scene he’s in and even James Marsden is great. Dude is usually kind of iffy in my opinion but he’s great in this. Probably all that practice with the other computer generated, anthropomorphic, animal movies he’s in. Look, i loved this movie. I absolutely did. It has it’s problems but, i mean, its f*cking Sonic and it’s good. It’s a good Sonic the hedgehog movie and that’s saying a mouthful considering the majority of the games that predate this thing. This movie is more Sonic than anything Sonic team has released in the last two decades and that;s absolutely ridiculous. I can’t wait for another one, as long as they maintain this level of quality.

This movie made me smile. Genuinely smile. I love Sonic. I’ve loved Sonic since i was a kid. Sonic the Hedgehog 2 is one of my all time video games. It’s the reason i got a Genesis way back when. In a world where Bayhem corrupted my beloved Transformers and Disney dropped the ball with Star Wars, seeing Sonic done proper justice on film is absolutely blessing. If you love the Blue Blur like i do or just enjoy wholesome family entertainment, this flick is definitely for you.

#Smokey brand Movie Reviews #Sonic the Hedgehog

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fma245 · 5 years

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High & Low -Tvtropes

Copied from Tvtropes:

Back-to-Back Badasses: Considering this is an action series, way too many times to count. The first movie makes it interesting by having people from different teams have each other's back and quibble.

Berserk Button: Do NOT say the word "crab" around Kabuto. Don't even say anything that could be MISHEARD as crab.

Book Dumb: Pretty much everyone in Mugen and Sannoh Rengokai. Aoyagi: 8 times 1 is 8, 8 times 2 is 14, 8 times 3 is 23...

Combat Parkour: How the Rude Boys fight, and considering they're the only ones who know how to get through the slums they live in, it makes them a really hard target to hit.

Chick Magnet: Cobra Dan: Set up a date for you, me and Cobra. Tetz: But if Cobra comes, wouldn't all the girls go to him?

Choke Holds: Cobra uses them so much that it's where he got his nickname from.

City with No Name: The region is only referred to by the gangs that run it, S.W.O.R.D.

Damn, It Feels Good to Be a Gangster!: Mighty Warriors beat up and steal from others and they love it!

Destination Defenestration: Kohaku kicks Aoyagi out of a 2nd story office in the first movie.

Defeat Means Friendship: The series seems to run on this trope.

Dirty Cop: The only cop with a name in the show is, indeed, corrupt.

Doomed by Canon: The first half of season 2 focuses on how Mugen came to be and their eventual fall. Since you already know Mugen was pretty much wiped off the map, you know things don't end pretty. You also quickly realize that Tatsuya isn't seen anywhere in season 1.

Downer Ending: Season 1 in SPADES. Noboru's turned around, finally back with his Childhood Friends again. He's willing to go down the straight and narrow. But right during his Friendship Speech he's hit by a car, and the episode ends with no clue to his condition. Thankfully it's followed up in season two. End of Sky wrecks you when The Stinger shows Hiroto Amamiya getting show before immediately fading to black.

Dude, Where's My Bike?: Masaki Amamiya got his bike towed in the first movie, to hilarious effect.

Dumb Muscle: Sannoh Rengokai S1 Opening Narration:Sannoh Rengokai. They all grew up under the same circumstances, in the same town. All had a bad upbringing, and don't have much smarts either. But no one matches their strength during a fight.

Elevator Action Sequence: Chiharu manages to trick a member of Daruma Ikka into pushing his teammates into an elevator. He then proceeds to kick stomp them and send them to another floor.

Excuse Me While I Multitask: Hiroto beats up a half dozen guys, while on his phone, trying to order from the vending machine.

Family of Choice: Rude Boys is a gang made up of those left parent-less by either death or abandonment. They protect each-other and consider themselves a big family.

A Friend in Need: The reason that former Mugen members Cobra and Yamato made Sannoh Rengokai was so that their Childhood Friend, Noboru, could have a place to come back to. Despite Noboru almost killing Yamato and Chiharu in the finalie, Yamato and Cobra still try to convince him that they're still friends and to come back. Thankfully they were able to bring Noboru back to their side. This is also why Yamato helps Chiharu, even though he knows it could cause a huge ripple in SWORD as members are not supposed to switch gangs. And thanks to Yamato's desire to help Chiharu, the rest of Sannoh Rengokai comes in to save them as well. In the first movie, Cobra, Yamato and Aoyagi all come together to bring Kohaku back from his Heel–Face Turn - knowing that he's suffering like this because of Tatsuya's death.

Gang of Hats: Each of the gangs in High&Low have a very specific aesthetic. They often take the tropes associated with their groups and turn them Up to Eleven. Sannoh Rengokai: Greaser Delinquents White Rascals: Man in White Oya High: School of Hard Knocks Rude Boys: Le Parkour Daruma Ikka: Thug Dojo Kuryu Group: Yakuza Mighty Warriors: Gang Bangers Doubt: Evil Wears Black Strawberry Milk: Female Japanese Delinquents Mugen: All Bikers Are Hells Angels Amamiya Brothers: Badass Biker Sibling Team

Gangsta Rap: Discovering Wu-Tang Clan's music was what saved Ice as a kid, and it's an obvious influence on how he build up the Mighty Warriors.

Guyliner: Murayama Kizzy, with nailpolish, foundaiton, and lipgloss Hirai from Doubt, with black nailpolish

Gratuitous English: EVERYWHERE. Most of the graffiti in SWORD is all in English. Tons of characters drop random words in English - notably Rocky's catchphrase 'Party Time', and Ice with his catchphrase 'Change or Die', among other phrases. The characters who's actors speak English are much more likely to drop gratuitous English.

Gratuitous Foreign Language: Li, a Korean gangster, has some conversations in Korean in the first movie. It does help that he's played by a Korean singer.

Gold Tooth: Rocky wears silver grills.

Held Back in School: Almost all of Oya High is composed of 20 year olds - because they all intentionally held themselves back so they could stay within the gang. Chiharu Yamato, serving Chiharu a drink: Drink! Oh, wait, you can't drink yet can you? Chiharu: I'm 20. A lot of things happened and I got held back and... Tetz: Wait, you're a real idiot!!!

Improvised Armour: Masaki and Kohaku wrap chains around their limbs in order to fend off a katana wielding opponent.

Improvised Weapon: Too many times to count. Some of the times that are not covered by the tropes below include trash cans, taiko drumsticks, fire extinguishers, motorcycles and a shopping cart. Batter Up! Boulder Bludgeon Cane Fu Car Fu Chain Pain Chairman of the Brawl Clothing Combat Flipping the Table Grievous Bottley Harm Kill It with Fire: Huuga attacked members of the Kuryu with a stick on fire Pipe Pain Wrench Whack

Incurable Cough of Death: It's not specified what Smokey's suffering from, but he's definitely not doing well considering he continues to cough up blood after hard fights.

The Lad-ette: Strawberry Milk is full of rude speaking, bike riding women. However it seems to be a bit of a facade, considering that some of the girls like Junko are a bit girly, but they keep up their Ladette attitude. Junko, much to her dismay, scared off a guy hitting on her by going TOO ladette on him.

Manly Tears: Yamato, Cobra and Noboru all cry in the season 1 finale when they all try to reconcile. In the first movie, Yamato and Cobra cry when trying to convince Kohaku to stop his plan to destroy all the gangs.

Police are Useless: Stated outright in the first movie when the police were too busy stopping other disasters in the area to come and help the main characters.

Pre-Asskicking One-Liner: "It's party time" (Rocky)

Rule of Cool: Why does every gang have incredibly incredible, matching fashion sense? How do any of them pay for anything considering no gang (except the White Rascals and Mighty Warriors) seems to have any sort of income?

Shirtless Scene: Yamato gets a few when he's getting bandaged up after a fight.

Trauma Conga Line: This applies to way too many characters, but below is a standout case: The Amamiya Brothers: Their parents died in an apparent suicide, then the older brother goes off to who knows where, driving the younger two to search for him. When they finally reunite, the older brother ends up dying while revenging against their parents' deaths. Then in the End of Sky movie, Masaki watches Hiroto get shot in the chest by a sniper right before the movie ends.

Two-Teacher School: Oya High has exactly zero teachers. Not surprising, considering the students that attend...

Wife-Basher Basher: Don't you dare hurt your girl in the White Rascals' district, or you're liable for a beating - or worse.

Would Hit a Girl: DOUBT will do anything to get what they want. Up to and including abducting and abusing women. Murayama seemed interesting in fighting a girl who had a crush on him.

Wrestler in All of Us: Cobra manages a suplex in episode 1, but as an action series there are quite a few wrestling movies used on-screen.

#jdrama #high&low #exile #ldh

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mirrorfalls · 3 years

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Lego Liveblogs ST: TOS, part 12 (of who-the-hell-knows-how-many?)

Lotta high hopes riding on this one, folks, in spite of the permanently-Simpsons-tarred villain name. Will they wind up breaking the Conscience of the King? Let’s find out.

* Easily the least science fiction-y opening we’ve had so far: no Enterprise bridge, no stars, just a single line of dialogue this is an Earth play being done by non-Earthlings. * Aww, Kirk’s pals with Nick Fury! * So the inspiration for this one isn’t hard to figure - fugitive Nazi hunts were all the rage back in the ‘60s. Which makes it all the more interesting how eager Kirk is to brush the whole thing off. * The best forensics Starfleet has to offer... what, couldn’t even get fingerprints for comparison? * Hope you’re read up on your Poe too, good Captain. You oughta know what happens to Lenores... * Woo. Now there’s a mood-killer. ** I swear, if it turns out he faked his death just to guilt Kirk into investigating... * Now, now, Mr. Spock. Green isn’t your color. * “The regulations are very clear about taking on passengers... especially after that Charlie kid passed through.” * Another benchmark (I think) the first solo Spock-Bones dialog. ** “Now I know why they were conquered.” Jesus, Bones, I thought you were past your racist phase! * So... the tour scene. I can practically feel the effort dripping off every word of the script, but it still falls a ways short of actually convincing me Kirk has any emotional investment in this, rather than just stringing her along for leads. At the very least, they could’ve found a slightly more organic metaphor to tie into the idea of Kirk being chained by his command. * In contrast, this very next scene is something that shouldn’t work but does: Spock spits out the entire story behind Kirk’s behavior in roughly two minutes, before the episode’s even halfway done. Part of it is Nimoy, letting just the right amount of “fuck Vulcan culture, I have things to say about eugenics” fury seep through, and the other part is all in the script: Kodos’ butchery is one of those things that looks kiiiiinda reasonable if you’re in the ruler’s seat, and absolutely goddamn horrifying from literally any other POV. Both options, at least on paper, could driving Kirk’s own stake in this whole thing. * Oh hey, it’s the Irish guy from The Naked Time! Welcome to the “only people who can hang Kodos (assuming he’s still alive)” club! ** Aaaaaand goodbye. Really, hanging out in that big a room by yourself, you were kinda asking for it. ** (Also: Windex in his milk is a hilariously Realistic(tm) way of going about it, but I kinda wish they tried ear-poison for full Shakespeare points.) ** (Also also: Why do I get the feeling someone on-set probably cracked a “Christ, Uhura’s singing was that bad?!”) * So Bones and Spock confront Kirk over... something. I’m theoretically happy that the script isn’t taking the easy way out and making them go “You’re just seeing things, Jim!”, but the whole oooh-Kirk-might-snap thing isn’t much good for building suspense, since at this point Kirk still insists on taking the investigation slow. Hell, if anything they should be dragging him over not putting more men on the case! * And now, Kirk and Spock reenact me searching for my car keys * Alright, we’re deep in the third act now, so let’s get that face-to-face showdown going. I’m sure Kirk’s carefully arranged the most subtle, intricate questions for teasing out- ** Or he could just ask him “Are you Kodos?” point-blank. Captain’s privilege. ** In all seriousness, this scene jumps out to me for one reason: neither of these men needs to go this far. All Kirk needs is a straightforward voice-print; all Kodos (or is he?!) needs is to go “Oh gee, this Kodos of yours sounds like a douche! Sure hope he’s gone for good!” Instead, they lay all their cards out, because tiptoeing around their motives feels inherently repugnant; what they’re doing is Right, element of surprise be damned. * Alas, we end the act not on this, but on another goddamn sitcom cue of ~Lieutenant NPC overhearing something~ * Alright, so I guess this thirty-second sideshow is meant to prove how Kirk is still keeping a level head, but it’s a bit dulled by this being the exact part where the script tosses out any ambiguity. He is Kodos... and it looks like Murder For The Greater Good runs in the family. * Still, whatever problems I have with the script (which is getting less morally nuanced by the second), Lenore’s actress sells the hell out of her being genuinely delusional enough to think murdering people to cover someone’s tracks is equivalent to being a Soldier In A Cause. ** And I’ll admit: “The play’s over. It’s been over for twenty years.” is an absolute banger of a line. * Welp. ** C’mon, guys, I know you remastered this - couldn’t you have made it look even slightly less like she shot him on purpose? *** Unless... that was the point...? * Even if it was, though, this finale tips things from Unsettling to Just Plain Silly - rambling famous Shakespeare lines does not a compelling breakdown make, guys. ** And on top of that, because Females Are More Innocent, she doesn’t even have to live with what she’s done. * “You really cared for her, didn't you?” “I had about two-and-a-half scenes with her, Bones. What do you think?”

This play’s the thing, all right - it’s not quite as good as Balance of Terror, but it aims just as high, if not higher, and it get more than halfway there. Whatever my problems with the direction or Lenore (who’s a bit of a nonentity before the last act - I couldn’t even buy into her having a fake romance with Kirk), Shatner’s clearly having an absolute ball doing Shakespeare in Space, and Kodos’ actor brings a kind of pained gravitas that even the Romulan Commander never quite hit, almost enough to make you forget he massacred 4,000 innocents and didn’t even have the guts to own up to it until the very last second.

And more important than any of that, this is probably the biggest plank in Kirk’s backstory we’ll ever get: past friends and flames will definitely be walking onto the Enterprise for years to come, but none of them could cast such a haunting lens onto every action he takes from here on out. His Captaincy isn’t just a matter of playing hero or serving the Federation, but because he personally saw what horrors the self-righteous and powerful can wreak - and, so long as there’s a single breath left in him, vows he’ll never see again.

Next: Seven men walk into a planet...

#Lego Liveblogs Star Trek #Star Trek: The Original Series

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freckles-like-stars-n-shit · 7 years

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Why you should listen to Wolf 359

Wolf 359 is a podcast about the crew of the hephaestus, a space station orbiting the star wolf 359. The first season starts simple enough with the day-by-day of lazy communications officer eiffel, militar commander minkowski, weird doctor hilbert and sarcastic A.I hera, going from funny “this is the last toothpaste on board so consider this a kidnapping” to “we’re reciving cryptic transmitions from earth and are those steps from outside the ship? im scared”.

And then things start happening, and they never stop.

So, why you should listen this podcast you ask?

Great characters

even in the first season with their simple enough base personalities they’re loveable, and when the character development hits them you will feel them alright

more great characters! not good characters, great ones (in every sense)

backstory mini episodes! (or extra 2hs episode)

literally will have at least a character you will love okay? you like a.i.s overflowing with personality? absolutely! you like nice characters with rough edges or terrible backstories? me too! you like ambiguosly evil yet charming characters? you like evil magnificent bastards with no redeemable qualities? oh boy you’re in luck!!!

the relationships between the characters are just so good, the friendships and enmities and the two scenes of a character trying to reach her husband feel so real

Great music

the music here is just great, it blends perfectly with the scenes and it makes quite a atmosphere

seriously if you like piano you’re gonna love the soundtrack its all handmade

i dont know shit abt music in a technical sense but if you wanna listen to it its all here and it has some great titles like: “Positive reinforcement only in moderation please lest we get carried away” “Concern that the current course of action is vaguely unethical” “What are we standing in line for again i also dont remember sorry but im excited” and my personal fave: “You were probably happier yesterday”

(Honorary mention to Paradise valley by honey and the string, that musicalizes a banger of a scene)

More things you ask?

Space

Found family trope

existencialism abt how we’re just a very tiny part of the big picture

somtimes the stations goes to shit and they have to share the same space for a while and talk abt their feelings and when its not heartcrushing its hilarious

searching for a l i e n s

classical music !!!

SpAcE

kickass ladies

eiffel talks almost 90% in pop culture references (but didnt watch groundhog day)

the episodes start having around 17 minutes so its easier to get into it and by the time season four hits w/ its 40 minutes you’re used to it

i dont know what else to say except its starts funny and gets darker w/ time until ur like crying but its good i promise

also after like the end of the first season i cant say anything else bc e v e r y t h i n g is a spoiler alright its that kind of show

give it a chance please

SPACE

#wolf 359 #wolf359 #podcast #i just #love this podcast #i need more ppl to listen to it even tho its ending #i cant believe i got into it by this time smh i should have started it sooner ;_;#anyway this is why yall should listen to it #tani's log

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gwensanotherdimension · 4 years

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Not Legit Movie Reviews

After a 6 month hiatus I have returned with a relevant movie review! This one was fun to write so I hope you enjoy!

Before you continue reading, if you haven’t seen the movie, I spoil the ending and describe some scenes in detail. This review also works if you’re familiar with the first Phineas and Ferb movie; Across the 2nd Dimension. I would also like to preface this as I know my sister is going to read this, a lot of these thoughts and ideas were discussed together, so a lot of these opinions are influenced by her opinion as well, but luckily, we came to the same conclusion about this movie.

This movie was heavily anticipated as the Phineas and Ferb series ended in 2015, which was a long 5 years ago. I have always liked this show, the characters were all enjoyable, the songs were extremely catchy and the plot was always engaging.

As a kid, it hit all the benchmarks for what made a kid’s show great. Only when I wrote my own episode with my sister for a school assignment, did I realize that there was so much hard-work and effort put into the show to make it the spectacular show that it is. The genius’ behind the show; Dan Povenmire and Jeff “Swampy” Marsh are an extremely talented and creative duo who had previously worked on The Simpsons and Rocko’s Modern Life together; they write a majority of the episodes as well as the songs themselves which are extremely impressive as they’re in almost every single episode. As the impressive song-writers that they are, they are masters at making the songs original and catchy - multiple generations know what an aglet is because of this show, I don’t know what else to say other than the songs are absolute bangers.

But let’s not waste anytime, Candace against the Universe was not their best. I’m just going to say it right now. The plot wasn’t the strongest in terms of story and twist. It was predictable and simply not as interesting as regular episodes or Across the 2nd Dimension which I will compare heavily to this movie. My sister and I had a long discussion about how it was similar to the Mission Marvel special where the content had potential but it missed the original charm and wit that the episodes have. This movie could have easily been condensed into a two parter, or just under forty-five minutes. The plot of Across the 2nd dimension was so strong and was executed so perfectly; a quick summary: Phineas and Ferb help Doofenshmirtz build an ‘inator’ to another dimension but Perry is stuck between exposing himself as a secret agent to the boys or allowing them to help Doofenshmirtz take over the Tri-State area. He ends up doing both which carries the rest of the story to meet their alternate-dimension selves and then finally comes together at the end in a massive battle where alternate-dimension attempts to conquer yet another Tri-State area (the one that we’re familiar with).

I felt like the problem with Candace against the Universe, the ending was very anti-climatic. It ends in a short battle which felt lacking compared to the final battle in Across the 2nd dimension. My sister and I absolutely love how in the end of AT2D, it was revealed that Perry had been collecting their inventions throughout the summer and had been saving them for an ‘Alpha-level’ threat. It’s a thrilling pay-off for audiences to see that all of their incredible inventions haven’t gone to waste after a single use - they have a second purpose - which is to fight evil. In Candace against the Universe, it followed a very basic plot structure, Candace is captured by an alien species in space, they give her what she’s looking for which is individuality and validation, the boys ‘save’ her but then Candace kicks them to the curb, the true intentions of the alien leader are revealed and it’s a race to save Candace and the rest of the humans on earth. What made the ending in AT2D so satisfying was seeing all of the inventions come back, obviously they couldn’t do that again in this movie but I felt like there could’ve been a better ending to it.

Within the first ten minutes of Candace against the Universe, we’re introduced to Doofenshmirtz’s newest invention. ‘A power-vacuum-inator.’ a machine that turns things into lint and then vacuums it away. A pretty hilarious contraption which isn’t far away from the other inventions that he’s made before but later, we’re introduced to another invention, the ‘Chicken-replace-inator’ which swaps things with the closest chicken; pretty self-explanatory but it proves itself handy later. What my sister and I found as a ‘cop-out’ was how easy they made it so that Doofenshmirtz and Vanessa could return to earth. When the Mama plant is preparing to take over Danville, a simple blast from the ‘Chicken-replace-inator’ zaps it away and the cast breaks out into a final song. But before I continue, let’s talk about Vanessa’s purpose to the plot.

A huge drawn-in point to the movie was Candace and Vanessa as a duo. In the episodes it was exciting to see them come together and interact because they’re connecting the plot line of Phineas and Ferb to the plot line of Doofenshmirtz and Perry which is pretty high stakes since Perry can’t reveal to his host-family that he’s a spy. But, early on into the movie, Candace and Vanessa get split up and we don’t see them together again until the very end of this movie. Before Doofenshmirtz reunites with Vanessa, he uses the ‘Chicken-replace-inator’ to zap away a large dragon-monster creature, replacing it with the closest chicken, which is on earth; so there’s now a chicken on the alien planet. Unfortunately for them, when Doofenshmirtz, Vanessa and Perry (who were left behind by the others) want to return to earth they attempt to use the ‘Chicken-replace-inator’ on themselves but, if you remember from before, the closest chicken is now the chicken on the alien planet. So the ‘cop-out’ of the inator is that Doofenshmirtz, Vanessa and Perry simply change the settings of the inator to swap places with the furthest chicken instead of the closest. And, anti-climatically use the inator to blast and switch the Mama plant with the furthest chicken (the one back on the alien plant). Which got me thinking, that was a pretty lazy ending, it was anti-climatic and just an easy way out. They already had a “battle” with Candace shooting free t-shirts at the minions so they needed to get rid of the plant quickly.

I thought it over in the shower, what would’ve made for a similar ending to AT2D? Where they would use Chekhov’s gun and make use of everything that was introduced in the movie. If they had defeated the Mama plant with the vacuum, it would’ve given the movie an extra ten minute action scene; where Baljeet has his ‘a-ha!’ moment and finally his knowledge of Space Adventures doesn’t fail him or Phineas takes the spotlight (when the boys are hurtling towards the ground and Phineas uses something he saw in Space Adventures to save them) Baljeet could reference an episode were they created an air-vacuum to deprive something of all air, drying it out and killing it; tying the end to the beginning. I understand they decided to use the ‘Chicken-replace-inator’ because they spent so much time on it but as I was saying before, it just wasn’t satisfying. It was already pretty silly and made just for the sake of being a joke but I felt it would’ve been better suited to use the Power-Vacuum-inator.

Which brings me to my next point, the running gags. When Phineas and Ferb pull the crew together to go to space, Baljeet introduces Space Adventure - an adventure in space - which is reminiscent of Star Trek and referenced in an older episode (Nerds of a Feather) Throughout the movie, Baljeet attempts to help navigate alien territory with his knowledge of Space Adventure but it backfires on him every time. However, when they’re hurtling back to Earth, Phineas references Space Adventure and saves them, essentially taking Baljeet’s running gag from under his feet which didn’t sit right with me. It didn’t come to a satisfying conclusion. Again, I understand not everything has to come full circle but this should’ve. Same with Buford’s running gag, when they’re packing for space, Buford brings aboard a canoe, everyone but Buford can agree that there’s absolutely no use for a canoe in space; so it’s ‘funny’ that Buford is dead-set on carrying around a massive canoe into space and back. But the conclusion that he gets is that it gets strapped to a golf cart and swings into the aliens, knocking them out.

Finally, there’s a relationship that wasn’t fully developed but still happened that bothers me. When the crew crash land on the alien planet, there’s discourse between Isabella and Doofenshmirtz on who should ‘lead’ the group to the fortress that Candace is most likely held in. Isabella supports her claim as leader since she’s a girl scout and has patches proving her worthy as a leader but Doofenshmirtz is the adult so naturally, he should be leader. My complaint is that there is absolutely no development between Isabella and Doofenshmirtz but yet, a mere twenty minutes later Doofenshmirtz believes that Isabella is a deserving leader and saying that he “learnt from the best” yet there is no example of Isabella being the natural leader that she is.

Moving away from my problems with the plot, I felt that the jokes and gags in the movie weren’t as hilarious as other jokes in episodes or AT2D. I read a review from Variety and Polygon which had high praise for the movie, which includes “ jokes about support groups, power ballads, Cubism, talk-show obsequiousness, plus a very funny song called “Adulting,” about how adults justify their judgment with no good reason.” (Variety) and “The movie is still chock full of bubbly humor. The show excelled at comedic timing, effectively using beats, cutaway gags, and fourth-wall breaking.” And while I agree with the second half, the movie missed some of the benchmarks of Phineas and Ferb-level humour. The jokes in the movie were uncomfortably off-beat and repetitive, heavily relying on comedic timing and dead air for audiences to laugh. The comedic timing was unsuccessful and dare I say, too long and too often. The jokes couldn’t have been more obvious, they were pretty much lit up with fireworks and a huge neon sign that said “You should laugh here! This is a joke that is funny and you can laugh here! That’s what this awkward empty space is for.” After a brief scan of AT2D there were jokes that didn’t feel forced or obviously meant for certain audiences - like one of the aliens ‘flossing’ which feels a little outdated even for 2020.

As mentioned earlier, after writing my own Phineas and Ferb script I have a much larger appreciation for the work put into a single episode. Povenmire and Marsh out-do themselves with each episode and it’s impressive; I admire their work so much. Now, I don’t know if it’s because I went into the mindset of knowing what makes Phineas and Ferb great, this movie felt lacking in the original appeal that the episodes had. The characters didn’t have the depth they usually had, the songs weren’t as catchy, the jokes weren’t as funny and the plot wasn’t as strong. It felt rushed; and I don’t know if they were but there could’ve been so much more depth and (irony not included) dimension.

I have the same opinion with Frozen 2, it felt rushed so there wasn’t as much depth as the first movie. And, they were rushed with the movie; in the docu-series Into the Unknown: The making of Frozen 2, so many elements in the final movie were added within the last nine months of production. The story was rewritten multiple times when the writers and directors had trouble deciding who Elsa was hearing calling out to her. They just had to choose at that point which made the story feel rushed and bunched. It’s like rolling up a yoga mat, you start off neat and even but when you get near the end and your friends have already packed up, you haphazardly roll up the mat, so now it’s pointed at one end and looks like an ice cream cone.

Don’t get me wrong, I still watched the entire thing and there was one scene at the end that I enjoyed but it just didn’t live up to my expectations. And that’s totally okay; it was appealing to their target audience and hit all the notes of a Phineas and Ferb movie. It’s simply that I had my expectations extremely high.

I give Phineas and Ferb The Movie: Candace Against the Universe 5.5 Stars out of 10

#phineas and ferb #candace against the universe #movie review #movie essay #please don't kill me i swear i actually like phineas and ferb disneyplus #catu #catu spoilers #pnf #pnf candace #pnf catu

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obtusemedia · 4 years

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Ranking Taylor Swift’s albums, worst to best

Taylor Swift is arguably the most successful musician of the 21st century so far. And she’s accomplished her millions of record sales and hordes of fans not by chasing musical trends (well, most of the time), but typically through her strong classical pop sensibilities and evocative lyrics.

This is what makes Swift unique amongst her fellow popstars — her brand, her selling point, is her songwriting. She doesn’t have powerhouse vocals like Adele or Ariana Grande. She’s not a artsy auteurist like Lady Gaga or Beyoncé. And she doesn’t cannily ride the current sound like Drake or Justin Bieber. Perhaps the only other major popstars that emphasize songwriting first are Ed Sheeran (who’s not nearly as talented) and Lorde (who’s sadly not nearly as successful).

2020 marks both the 10-year anniversary of her transitional album Speak Now, as well as the one-year anniversary of the eclectic Lover. And of course, Swift’s eighth and newest record, folklore, was just released about a month ago.

I figure this year of anniversaries and new music for Swift would be a good time to reflect on her lengthy career and rank her eight albums from worst to best. (And also, it’s still quarantine season. What else am I going to do with my life?)

So here’s my list. Are you ready for it? (sorry, sorry, I had to make that joke)

#8: Taylor Swift (2006)

Despite landing at the bottom of this list, Taylor Swift’s self-titled 2006 debut isn’t a bad record. Any album with pop-country classics like “Picture To Burn” or “Teardrops On My Guitar” can’t be dismissed. But any fan that says it’s a truly great album has been blinded by childhood nostalgia.

Swift’s 16-year-old viewpoint can be endearing on this album, but it’s also its biggest roadblock. Many of the songs have quite maudlin or cliché-ridden lyrics, and the unmemorable non-hits (which are plentiful) all start to sound the same at a certain point. Of course, Swift’s singles are almost always album highlights (and they are here, too), but her best albums also have plenty of hidden gems. The self-titled doesn’t.

Not to mention — and this is where my personal bias creeps in — the self-titled is also Swift’s most country-flavored album. That’s just not my genre, and Swift’s fake twang (remember, she grew up in Pennsylvania, NOT the South) can get grating.

In hindsight, the self-titled debut was more about flashing glimpses of Swift’s ceilings songwriting talent rather than being a great record in its own right. But if you have a higher tolerance for corny pop-country, it’s a decent listen.

BEST SONGS: “Teardrops On My Guitar,” “Picture To Burn,” “Should’ve Said No”

WORST SONG: “A Place In This World”

#7: Fearless (2008)

Fearless is essentially the self-titled debut pt. 2, but it’s an improvement in just about every way.

The singles are stronger — and there’s more of them. There’s still some country flavor, but it’s less obnoxious (although I dig those hoedown fiddles on “Tell Me Why”). And there’s actually some solid deep cuts, particularly the adorable “Hey Stephen” and the righteously pissed “Forever & Always.”

Unfortunately, some of Swift’s annoying early-career tendencies still pop up on Fearless. There’s a couple tracks that land on the overly saccharine side of cheesy, particularly the maudlin “The Best Day.” And almost all the classic tunes are front-loaded in the record’s first half.

Furthermore, because many of the later tracks just sound like weaker versions of the singles, Fearless seems like it goes on forever, despite being one of Swift’s shorter albums at only 53 minutes.

Fearless was a major step up, and its singles are classics for a reason. But she still had some work to do.

BEST SONGS: “Love Story,” “You Belong With Me,” “Hey Stephen”

WORST SONG: “The Best Day”

#6: reputation (2017)

reputation is one of the few albums that’s both underrated and overrated. Its reputation (sorry) amongst the general public as a totally misguided bomb isn’t fair — it’s wildly entertaining and even a bit risky at points. But I really can’t agree with some Swifties who proclaim reputation as her best album, as it does have some deep flaws.

Occasionally, reputation actually is the bonkers, risky album that it wants to be. Tracks like “I Did Something Bad” and “This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things” are deliciously poisonous and campy. “Delicate” and “Call It What You Want” are stunningly downcast ballads.

Also — and I’m a tad ashamed to admit this, but whatever — after initially hating it like everyone else, I’ve come to adore “Look What You Made Me Do,” a truly bizarre lead single choice. It’s so delightfully extra! It sounds like a Disney villain song produced by the Black Eyed Peas! I simply can’t resist something this silly and over-the-top.

But despite these highlights, reputation doesn’t as get edgy or weird as it promises. There’s a good handful of forgettable ballads, along with some wannabe bangers with production that already sounds horribly dated. Say what you want about Lady Gaga’s ARTPOP — the precursor to reputation in just about every way, including its semi-flop status — but Gaga went for it.

I’m not asking Swift to be Gaga; obviously, they have wildly different strengths as artists. But if you’re going to make an album all about getting in touch with ~your dark side~, then you better deliver the goods. And reputation stops just short of that for much of its runtime.

BEST SONGS: “Getaway Car,” “Look What You Made Me Do,” “Call It What You Want”

WORST SONG: “King Of My Heart”

#5: folklore (2020)

Easily Swift’s most “adult” album, folklore is probably the biggest outlier in her catalogue so far. There’s no goofy lead single, no fiery diss tracks towards her exes or Kanye West (although there is a subdued one for Scooter Braun), and a good chunk of the album is taken up with short stories, rather than songs primarily inspired by Swift’s personal life.

Like with reputation, I have torn feelings about folklore. On one hand, I really respect Swift’s commitment to the record’s dour, decidedly un-pop aesthetic. Who would’ve thought she’d ever write a shoegaze song like “Mirrorball” or a Sufjan Stevens-style number like “Invisible String” (seriously, it sounds just like Carrie and Lowell, minus the dead-mom lyrics)? Or that her best-ever duet would be with Bon Iver? And the vignette songs like “The Last Great American Dynasty,” “Illicit Affairs” and especially the humbly sweet “Betty” showcase some of Swift’s best-ever songwriting.

But although folklore might be Swift’s pinnacle lyrically, it does leave something to be desired musically. It’s still a great album, don’t get me wrong, but listening to the entire thing can be a bit draining. Unless you’re Lana Del Rey or Sufjan, I’m not sure you can pull off a ballads-only album like this. Swift writing an album without a single bombastic pop jam is like if Nirvana wrote an entire album without a single angsty headbanger.

Playing against type is a nice novelty, but I hope all of Swift’s future albums don’t go in this hushed direction.

BEST SONGS: “betty,” “exile,” “mirrorball”

WORST SONG: “peace”

#4: Speak Now (2010)

In some ways, Speak Now is the training wheels version for Swift’s album that would come next. But it’s still a tour-de-force in its own right, and a remarkably impressive record for someone who wasn’t even of drinking age at the time of release.

The short stories that make up the bulk of Speak Now are rich with details, from the catty and hilarious descriptions of the bride’s family in the title track to the vivid rom-com scene setting in the Springsteen-esque “Mine.” I also love the interesting tweaks on traditional stories that are in the record. “The Story Of Us” is about a slowly-drifting apart couple, rather than a hyper-dramatic breakup. In “Back To December,” Swift takes the blame for a relationship’s end (which was a huge deal back in 2010, let me tell you).

Speak Now is also the first album where Swift started to dabble in some different musical styles, and most of them work quite well! With its wall-of-sound production and heartland guitar crunch, “Sparks Fly” is basically a Tom Petty song. “Enchanted” throws some dreampop synths in the mix. And while “Better Than Revenge” is marred by some rough lyrics that are a bit slut shame-y, it’s still a kickass pop-punk pastiche.

Every time I start to listen to Speak Now, I wonder why it’s not my favorite — the first 10 songs of the record are truly stacked. But unfortunately, it limps to the finish line with its three most forgettable songs and one misguided, insanely patronizing ballad about Kanye West (which is especially disappointing when you compare it to West’s career-defining opus about the 2009 VMAs, “Runaway”). Speak Now is Swift’s longest record, at 67 minutes, and you really feel that length by the time it’s finished.

If it weren’t for a lack of quality control — an issue for pretty much every one of Swift’s albums except one — and a couple aggravating tracks (looking at you, “Mean”), Speak Now would easily be in Swift’s top-tier. But as it stands, it’s still the best record from her country years by a mile.

BEST SONGS: “Sparks Fly,” “Enchanted,” “The Story Of Us”

WORST SONG: “Last Kiss”

#3: Lover (2019)

I think this one has already become underrated. And I put the blame entirely on “ME!” (the song, not the person writing this). What genius thought putting the album’s worst track by far — a tacky, overly focus-grouped mess — as the lead single would be a good idea? And Brandon Urie as the duet partner? Really? Ugh.

But, if you can look beyond that heinous first impression, Lover is a joyous, wonderfully eclectic grab bag of a record. Unlike most of her albums, it doesn’t have one cohesive theme or musical style ... but I find that refreshing.

Granted, Swift didn’t dive too far outside her comfort zone — as interesting as it would be to hear her try it, there’s unfortunately no black metal song. But she still worked with a wide palette of pop subgenres. There’s *takes a deep breath* a ‘50s-style prom ballad (the title track), Chromatics-style dreampop (“The Archer”), Lana Del Rey-style midcentury baroque (“Miss Americana”), Paramore-style peppy pop-punk (“Paper Rings”), Katy Perry-esque so-corny-it’s-brilliant electropop (“London Boy,” “You Need To Calm Down”) and Lorde-style intimate minimalism (“It’s Nice To Have A Friend”).

And that list doesn’t even mention the impossibly cool “Cruel Summer” (one of only two Swift songs to earn that adjective) and the heart-crushing “Soon You’ll Get Better.” This album is Swift throwing everything at the wall she can, Jackson Pollock-style, and creating a masterpiece.

Seriously, folks — just remove “ME!” from your Spotify queue, and you’ll see exactly how slept on Lover is. It’s what a big-budget pop album should be.

BEST SONGS: “Cruel Summer,” “The Archer,” “I Think He Knows”

WORST SONG: “ME!”

#2: Red (2012)

Surprise, surprise: Swift’s most acclaimed and successful albums are the top of this list. Sometimes, the obvious answers are the correct ones!

Before I get to why Red — many Swifties’ favorite album — just missed the top, let me first praise it profusely. As someone who grew up on arena rock, I have a soft spot for much of this album, which takes cues from U2/Coldplay-style anthems. Even the country-tinged title-track has a propulsive rock edge to it.

Songwriting-wise, Swift was on a hot streak during Red. The melodies soar, but the lyrics are cuttingly relatable — and I don’t just mean that for the weepy ballads. Who among us didn’t feel that 22 was a “miserable and magical” year? Many of us (if we’re lucky) have had at least one promising first date that felt like a ray of hope, like the one in “Begin Again.” And I’m sure we’ve all wanted to tell off an annoying ex as viciously as Swift does in the impeccable “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together” (her best single!).

And then there’s “All Too Well,” generally believed to be Swift’s crowning achievement by most fans and critics. They’re right. “All Too Well,” a nearly-six-minute towering epic of seething resentment and tainted nostalgia, is one of the greatest breakup songs ever written.

If there’s one flaw with Red, it’s the same flaw that most of Swift’s records have: its length. Even though nearly every song is a classic, I can still pinpoint a couple mediocre tracks that could’ve been trimmed (oh hi, “Stay Stay Stay”). By the time I get to the Kennedy cosplay of “Starlight,” I’m checking my watch. Which is an awful thing to say about an album this great! But Red is just a tad overindulgent.

Still, even Red’s worst moments are passable, and its best songs are untouchable. This was the moment when Swift finally realized her potential. And then she took it into hyperdrive with her next album...

BEST SONGS: “All Too Well,” “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together,” “Red”

WORST SONG: “Stay Stay Stay”

#1: 1989 (2014)

It feels a little wrong to have the least “Taylor Swift album” Taylor Swift album at the top of this list. More than any of her other records, 1989 feels like it could’ve been performed or written by another pop star.

But 1989 isn’t meant to be yet another Taylor Swift record filled with hyper-specific story songs and quirky, awkward lyrics (except the charmingly goofy “Shake It Off” and the quasi-self-roast of “Blank Space”). It was meant to be a challenge for Swift, to prove that she could create old-school bubblegum pop as catchy and laser-focused as anyone else on the Top 40 charts. And she wound up running laps around them.

1989 is a Millennial-pink tractor beam of synthpop glory. You have no choice but get sucked into its glittery spaceship. From perfect bubblegum nuggets like “All You Had To Do Is Stay” or “I Wish You Would” to gorgeous, sleek ballads like “Wildest Dreams” and “Clean,” every track is a winner. Even “Bad Blood” really isn’t that terrible.

At a brisk 48 minutes, 1989 is Swift’s shortest album, which means she avoids her fatal flaw for once: there’s no filler! It’s all killer!

I can understand why many Swifties prefer Red or even reputation to 1989 — they’re much more personal albums with more relatable lyrics. And I’ll admit, there’s no song on 1989 as perfect as “All Too Well.” But 1989 achieves exactly what a classic pop album should do: deliver bangers and sing-along jams with no weak points.

Red might be a comforting glass of Coke, but 1989 is a sparkling flute of Dom Perignon. What can I say? I have expensive taste.

BEST SONGS: “Style,” “Blank Space,” “All You Had To Do Is Stay”

WORST SONG: “Bad Blood”

#taylor swift

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smokeybrand · 4 years

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Smokey brand Movie Reviews: Don’t Stop Me Now

The Good

All of those game references are adorable. I mean, that Mushroom World reference, tho. Outstanding.

But that sound design, tho. I mean, the rings, Sonic’s spin dash, and even that little Green Hill remix; I loved al of it!

Shout out to Crazy Karl!

The Bad

Ugh. That Floss, tho. Really?

The Verdict

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moreracquetball · 7 years

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what are some of your favorite things to write? in general, but also dialogue vs description and why,, also (though im sure you've been asked this before) which are your fav songs from the marvin trilogy & why? :0

Ahhh, i love love love love this ask a lot!!

My favorite thing to write is probs anaphoras (I think that’s what they’re called?) Here’s an example of what I mean from my Whizzvin College AU:

And Whizzer wants to go back to how things were before—when it was just fun, with mouths pressed against inner thighs and secret glances when out with friends and arguing for the sake of getting the other to take his pants off.

But no, no, no, Whizzer wants to go back to how things were before even that—when they hated each other and it seemed like it would always stay that way, with mouths shooting off snappy retorts and pointed glares when out with friends and arguing just for the sake of hearing themselves talk.

Whizzer wishes that Marvin had never kissed him that day. He wishes that he himself could have been smart and kind enough to not kiss Marvin back.

Anyone who’s ever read one (1) fic of mine knows that I like to use repetition of phrases and sentence/paragraph parallels. I just love how it makes the prose really flow with a rhythm, you know???

I really like description (esp bc then I can use metaphors and imagery and try to make pretty prose that just ends up sounding like purple prose when I read it back), but I think I’m wayyy better and more well-practiced at writing dialogue. My dialogue is never really choppy (maybe a little over-flowy at times but it’s usually p okay) and I feel like my descriptions (of another character, of the setting, of the narrator’s feelings, etc) is a hit or miss a lot of the times, so I’m more comfortable writing dialogue.

My favorite songs from the Marvin trilogy, you ask????

In Trousers:

1. My Chance to Survive the Night

It’s the most pivotal moment of the entire musical and the peak of Marvin’s character arc. After spending the entirety of the story having a sexuality crisis (wondering over whether he liked guys, whether he liked girls and guys, whether he liked girls at all in hindsight), Marvin finally accepts his homosexuality and commits to his true identity and literally says “that’s it for girls.” The music is also very jazzy and slow (compared to the majority of In Trousers songs, which have very fast melodies), and I just really loved Chip Zien’s voice here in particular. Esp at the very end, when he just lets it all go and starts belting it out, my heart skips a beat. It’s my favorite song of In Trousers.

2. A Breakfast Over Sugar

I love the exploration of Marvin and Trina’s relationship pre-divorce. Esp after knowing in hindsight how they react/treat to one another in the later sequels (obviously, I had listened to Falsettos before In Trousers and only knew of Marvin and Trina’s relationship in that sense as bitter exes), this song just brings a lot of context and depth to their relationship and past. It shows Trina’s desperation and willingness to play house and be unhappy, and it shows Marvin’s growth of character as he is through playing this charade and wants something real in his life - even if he has to give up all that he had ever known. The duet is also written very realistically and uniquely (it sounds more like free-flowing dialogue than lyrics to a song, if that makes sense??), and the slow piano just - ughhh, KILLS ME. Wow i ranted a bit sorry about that.

3. Another Sleepless Night

It’s one of the songs that gives pretty equal attention to all four of the characters and not just Marvin, which i really like. It also shows how Marvin has affected each of the women in his life even after years of separation and just how selfish Marvin has really been throughout his life and how much he has taken from these women. I’m also obsessed with the lines “I know this girl. I call her my wife. She is my wife. She is my thorn in the bushes. No happy endings and no fuss. What a girl, what a saint, what a wife ain’t is my wife. So I sleep in a bed too big for one person. I’m big for one person. But this bed is bigger than both of us.”

March of the Falsettos

1. This Had Better Come to a Stop

First of all??? Just the music in general is??? A full-fledged banger??? But even aside from the scarily catchy melody, I love how much it adds to the story by demonstrating like a “typical” day in their lives and how they all bitch and accuse and heart-break over one another. It shows Marvin’s selfishness and meanness, and it shows Trina’s anger and heartbreak, and it shows Whizzer’s frustration and helpless, and it shows Mendel breaking through the barriers of this tight-knit family and wedging himself in there, and it shows Jason in the background of it all, watching with wide, disappointed eyes. It also has the parallels between Whizzer and Trina (the whole “I met this man today…” and trying to make Marvin jealous; as well as the shared look of pain and the soft “this is all very neat”), which I am 100% HERE FOR OMG. And it has the blessed line: “AND STILL THE BASTARD DIVORCED ME.”

2. I Never Wanted To Love You

I could actually talk about this song for approximately 100,000 hours, so I’ll try to keep it short. For one, it’s right after the most climatic scene of the musical (”Marvin Hits Trina”), which makes the song all the more devastating. Mainly, love it because it shows 1) the complex nature of all these characters’ relationships/dynamics with one another (all of which have been driving the whole plot and theme) and 2) It’s the beginning of Marvin’s redemption arc and him confessing his wrong-doings and the root of his insecurities. I love the slow, melancholic melody and the harmonies and the lyrics, and it’s just - really really really powerful.

3. I’m Breaking Down

It’s def my fave solo of the Act 1 AT THE VERY LEAST. It’s just so hilarious and Stephanie J. Block KILLS IT OH MY L O R D and I love Trina a lot and it’s just one of the more light-hearted songs that never fails to hype me up and make me smile

Falsetto Land

1. A Day in Falsettoland

It’s just so pure and happy and I love the little piano bit. Mendel is esp hilarious in the first part (and it’s the closest that he’s ever come to a solo soooo i love it lots) and Trina is i c o n i c and the lesbians are sooo cute (Tracie KILLS IT ESP - OHHHHHHH HER “DO YOU KNOOOWWWW HOW GREAT MY LIFE IS?”) and it shows how Marvin and Whizzer’s relationship has matured and grown stable and less toxic and they all tell me that “everything will be alright” and every single time, I almost believe them.

2. Year of the Child

I just really love the melody and the choreography and vocals. Marvin and Trina are like so very cute in this song bc it shows how much they both adore Jason, and Mendel is such an icon, and it’s the introduction of the lesbians next door!! What more could you ask for????

3. What Would I Do?

Honestly I can’t even talk about how much I adore this one - how often I binge-listen to it and feel my heart sink and swell - how all the layers and melancholy and references and harmonies and just everything about it can move me to tears. It’s so so so so so good and so so so so important and I could write 10k words dissecting the lyrics and context and overall meaning and purpose, but for now i’m just going to shut up.

#im not answering my asks in order y i k e s #also i might only answer a few more bc i feel like spacing them out so my #followers won't be swamped with all my asks and my boring responses to them #but umm yeah tell me about your fave marvin trilogy songs and why that sounds fun

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seajudge70-blog · 5 years

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Final Potter Party Update: Witches Get Snitches, A Niffler Repaint, & Our Goblet of Fire

So last night John and I filled the whole house with grease smoke from the banger we were test cooking, this morning John's foot went through the outside deck from a rotten board, and just now the garage door spring snapped (AAAAA), locking us out.

TWO DAYS TO GO!

It's times like these I most love being married to John; the man is unflappable. He's a rock. He's an unflappable married rock with a cute Superman curl. Calamity strikes, and John just tilts his head, says, "Huh," and then sets about fixing every thing.

So, we have a garage repairman coming tomorrow (even we don't miss around with garage springs; they can kill you), John's already replaced the rotten board (mercifully a fluke from a pile of wet dirt underneath; the rest of the deck is sound), and the house, well, it may smell a little like sausages on Saturday. But that's OK, because we're serving sausages.

Speaking of our sausages (heyooo), quick shout-out to Whole Foods, of all places, where this fabulous meat department guy named Mark custom-made gluten-free Bangers for us - on all the properly cleaned equipment and everything, AT NO EXTRA CHARGE. Wha whaaaaaaaaat? They taste amazing, too - probably even better when you eat them in a house NOT filled with grease smoke.

Now let me show you more party crafts! Our final Big Build is in the Puzzle Room, so that's staying under wraps for now, but I have a ton of small silly stuff to share:

The second I spotted these gold ornaments at Dollar Tree I knew exactly what they were:

Giant Snitches! They even have the swirly design!

All I needed were some of those silver glittery leaves/feathers you see everywhere at Christmas... until you start LOOKING for them, at which point they evaporate into the ether. I finally gave up searching and cut some thrift store leaves instead, which John spray-painted silver. Drilled two small holes, a little hot glue, and bam:

Giant snitches!

I even had the perfect place to put my big balls. (Oh, like I wasn't going to use THAT joke):

Right over the Kitty Quidditch Tower! Which you can see I decked out with a little garland wreath around the window. (And you get a bonus kitty action shot.)

Eva says hi.

I hope to have better photos for the official party post, btw; these are all phone pics taken at night.

I assumed the cats would try to destroy the snitch garland, but amazingly, not a single nibble. They're too busy eating every other piece of garland and greenery I have out.

I'll walk you through all the Puzzle Room builds in a separate post, since there are a lot and I don't want to spoil it for the guests, but here are two small things:

Remember my $3 thrift store cage? I suspended my Soot Sprite (by the amazing Monster Cafe, go follow them!) from a bit of fishing line inside, so it's floating. This made me unexpectedly and ridiculously happy. :D I think it'll be staying out year-round in the Game Room after this.

And a slightly more complex craft:

I made all these rune markers from rolled out clay, which I cut with a bottle top. I used a straw to poke holes for the leather cords, pressed the symbols in with a wooden stick, textured with a stiff paintbrush, then painted & dry-brushed with craft paint. I already had the clay, tools, and paint, so this was a freebie craft. Love those. Plus I think they turned out really looking like stone!

The runes are attached to various potion bottles around the room, and are part of my favorite puzzle. You'll see all of that later, promise.

Not my craft at all, but I think you'll like this:

"Beware the Nargles" mistletoe, hanging over the doorway to the deck! This was a gift from one of you readers a few years ago (I'm sorry I don't remember which one!), and I love having the perfect spot for it this year.

The weekend after Thanksgiving - when I was still so weak from being sick - my one and only outing was to stagger to Box Lunch with John to buy this Niffler game:

It was $20, down from $30. Honestly it's barely worth that much, but it's a ridiculously easy game for parties (you stack coins 'til the plate tips) and super cute, so, SOLD.

All the plain plastic pieces were making my eye twitch, though:

So... plasticky.

You know the drill: I slapped a bunch of black paint on everything, then quickly wiped it off again. Annnd:

Look what a difference! Aaaaaa, bliss.

The coins took a teensy bit longer (HA), because I aged both sides of all 64 coins, then Rub N' Buffed both sides of all 64 coins. My hands looked like they'd been tarred and gilded by the time I was done.

Now you can see the designs in the coins, though, which look surprisingly cool!

This is mostly a game of dexterity; it's VERY HARD to pick up the coins with the little wand shovels:

I also aged the base, but the Niffler didn't need anything; he's great as-is:

And I found the perfect plastic tray at Walmart for $2! This way I can move the whole game around while keeping the pieces together. (It'll be on the coffee table in the Common Room.)

I have so much more, you guys, but let me end with the one that's made us laugh the hardest:

A few weeks ago we found the most incredible urn/vase thing at a thrift store for $8:

The inner jewel thing is orange swirly resin. I didn't realize before this, but WOW does that look cool in photos! It's actually a little less impressive in real life, ha.

Anyway, at first I thought it would go in the Common Room, since it looks like a trophy, but I never found the right spot for it. Then, as John and I were brainstorming ways to give out some door prizes, a FLASH OF INSPIRATION.

(Brace yourselves.)

We are hilarious, you guys.

(When I texted this photo to John he reported back that half the aisle at Walmart now thought he was insane, he laughed so hard.)

I should mention John has a long-standing, much vocalized dislike for Michael Gambon's portrayal of Dumbledore (#NotMyDumbledore), so a lot of our friends have sent this meme his way, and love to bring up the famously "calm" Goblet of Fire scene. (If you're lost, a quick Google will give you all you need to know - plus some laughs.)

We've also determined that, during the drawing, John will wear a long fake beard and attempt to body-slam the winners into the wall. You know, for authenticity.

And on that note, I'm off to try to finish this baby:

We won't stop thinking of new things to make 'til the moment the party starts. It's a sickness. A beautiful, stressful sickness. :D

Stay tuned for so much more. Just... just so much.

Love you guys. TTFN!

Source: https://www.epbot.com/2018/12/final-potter-party-update-witches-get.html

#read more #see more #check it out #interesting #learn more

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