#famous last words frankly.

[fadedrainbowbookshelves]

Eddie's Sick Day: Part Three!

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[sleppy-duck]

I WILL NOT BE GETTING INTO THE SPECIFICS TO AVOID SPOILER FOR YOU ALL BUT JUST KNOW THAT I AM IN SHAMBLES OK?!?

YOU'RE PAYING FOR MY THERAPY CLOWN ISTG /j

[astronicht]

Incomplete list of stuff that made me go apeshit reading Fellowship for the first time, medievalist edition (part II)

Part I here. Disclaimer: this is for fun!

Love that people keep stressing that they are going to the ELVES for COUNCIL. Old English names, especially among the rulers of Wessex, Northumbria, Mercia, etc, were often Elf Theme Names, one of the most famous and enduring of which is Alfred. Written the old way, Ælfræd or Ælfred (as in Alfred the Great), means Elf-Council, aka "counseled by elves". In their hearts... everyone wants to be Alfred... possibly this is only funny 2 me.

Tom Bombadil doing a training montage in the fucking magic system of Middle Earth?? He teaches Frodo to recite a poem that will summon him, Tom Bombadil, in times of need! Frodo gets kidnapped by undead wights in a barrow (like many a good young person in an Old Norse saga before him) and dutifully recites this magic poem. Frodo learned Recite Magic Poem! TOM BOMBADIL SMASHES THRU THE WALL OF THE BARROW LIKE THE KOOL-ADE MAN AND RECITES A BIGGER, STRONGER POEM??

At this point I gave up on trying to be normal about anything. As such, I'm pausing on Tom Bombadil again.

It helped (?? not psychologically) that Tom Bombadil recited something that felt a bit familiar, when he banished the wights. It's not anything like a direct translation, if indeed it bears any purposeful resemblance to the actual recorded medieval galdor called Against a Wen. Regardless, Against a Wen is an okay?? example of what a spoken word magic poem would look like, and why it's similar to what Tom Bombadil (and later Gandalf and others) do. Left screenshot is Bombadil against a barrow-wight. Right is Against a Wen, in English translation. (a wen was possibly a skin ailment, like a mole or a cancer). Banishing to/beyond the hills and shrivelling are the apparent themes. You don't have to follow me on this one, much less agree. Frankly this is the point I went off the deep end, probably.

Galdor can also protect! This just happens to be a banishment.

Gollum got exiled (the worst thing the early medieval and apparently proto-hobbit law could do to you) but not even for murder. No one found out about the murder. He just sucked.

ALSO Gollum lied and said that his matriarch (who exiled him) gave him the Ring. This implies it was plausible she'd give out rings, implying female ring-giver (standard role of a king). This is mentioned once and never again. ok!!

One last fun fact about galdor: it is the word at the end of "nightingale" isn't that lovely? Luthien's name in-universe means nightingale. This is fine!

I spent a lot of time researching Aragorn's favorite rock. I love these books. If I recall correctly it's a real rock! but possibly. just a cool rock.

[anisespice]

“ hate your boyfriend ” || tokyo rev.

two

synopsis: aw, your boyfriend hates when he’s around? good.

pairing: college!toman x gn!reader

warnings: mature language, toxic!toman, possessiveness, reader is sort of an enabler, implied cheating, slight angst for the partner (rip lol), open-ended, maybe a little unrealistic?? i think that’s it.

notes: there's just something about them knowing they're the shit & and can't nobody check them for it <333 i don't condone making your partner jealous/uncomfy in real life...but i be kicking my feet when it's in tokyorev lol hope you enjoy!

tagged: @fantasycantasy ( if you'd also like to be tagged in future works, feel free to join my taglist <333)

"Be nice." Famous last words spoken to your boyfriend before you went to greet MIKEY upon his arrival. You were having a little kickback at your place, and it only made sense that your closest friend got to be there as well, despite how they felt about one another.

It went well…for about five minutes.

Now, you stood between them as tensions arose, hands on your boyfriend’s chest to keep him pushed back while Mikey had no issue with fueling the fire, practically daring the bastard to swing first. It didn’t help that they’d drawn in a crowd, drunk instigators no doubt praying for a bloody brawl to liven up the once chill atmosphere. You don’t even know who started it, but you had a pretty good idea who was gonna finish it if things didn’t get under control.

“Aki, please, you promised you wouldn’t do this…”

“I didn't even do anything, he’s the one with the shitty attitude! Knew you shouldn't have invited him in the first place. And I'm sick of you always defending him, what exactly is this guy to you, [______]?"

Mikey kissed his teeth. “Such a nag. Can’t believe they have to fuck you-”

“Manjiro.” You hissed, sending him a warning glance.

He merely grinned, head tilted as he shamelessly cooed, “Yeah, angel?”

“The fuck you call them?” Aki pressed, taking a step closer. You planted your feet, preventing him from going any further. “Say it again, see what happens.”

Mikey shrugged, “Okay.” Leaning forward off the wall, he gently nudged your chin with his index finger, making you look directly in his eyes. “Yeah, angel?”

“You son of a—” Aki raised his fist, ready to swing; just what Mikey was hoping for. But, you were quick you latch onto the winding arm. No doubt he’d miss, then you’d have to explain why there’s a sandal-print on his face when he wakes up.

“He’s just kidding! Mikey has a, uh, crude sense of humor, always saying what’s on his mind at the wrong times. Never a dull moment.” You chuckled, nervously. “He didn’t mean anything by it…right?”

Sending him a pleading glance, Mikey remained unphased. The dark-haired gang leader eyed your boyfriend for a good, long minute. His dead eyes made the guy feel unsettled, especially since Mikey tended not to blink for periods of time. There were so many things he wanted to say at that moment, so many late night visits Aki knew nothing about—But, there’ll be plenty of opportunities for that later. He’ll play it cool. For now.

Mikey’s stare never wavered as his posture remained relaxed, his aura alone stunning the whole room to silence. The bystanders watched with bated breath. When the pools of obsidian refocused on you, he gave a reassuring wink. Aki didn’t take too kindly to that, stepping backward and taking you with him. The delinquent scoffed, but bit his tongue; he may have won the battle. But there's always the war.

With clenched teeth and a hollow smile, Mikey replied with a simple, “‘Course not. We’re all just friends here.”

Unbothered would be an understatement when describing how DRAKEN felt knowing how negatively your boyfriend felt toward him. Frankly, all he needed was a reason, and he'd happily knock the guy straight out of his shoes. But, for your sake, he remained...cordial.

He also pretended not to hear your little argument in the next room, feet propped up on the coffee table with his arms draped behind the couch, wearing an all too complacent grin knowing he was the subject matter. Again.

"Do you think I'm a fucking idiot!?" Your boyfriend exclaimed, frustrated. Draken couldn't help but snort, wanting so badly to answer the question for you with a fat yes. "I've seen the way he looks at you, we’ve all seen it, so don’t act like I’m the one with the problem!"

“Takeru, just calm down, there’s nothing going on between us-”

“Don’t tell me to calm down!” The sound of something shattering, followed by your shriek, made the mechanic perk up in mild alarm; amusement no longer painted his face.

Alright, he thought. Here comes that reason.

It only took him a few strides to get to your bedroom door, nearly splitting the wood in two after he kicked it in. Startling the both of you, Draken’s first priority was to check on your well-being, scanning your person for any visible injury. Luckily, you just appeared to be shaken up a little. Once he was certain, the former blonde directed a hard look toward Takeru, then down at the lamp he just broke. Draken worked his jaw—He gifted you that lamp.

“Kenny…” you said, cautiously. You could sense his impending rage from mere inches away, and you knew your boyfriend would only keep poking the bear. And you’d be correct. “I-It was an accident. Things just got a little out of hand, that’s all-”

“The hell you still doing here, baldy? Thought I told you to-”

Draken chuckled, menacingly. Your partner fell silent, wondering what was so funny, while you just closed your eyes in defeat; you knew that sound meant nothing good. His gunmetal eyes leered down at the pitiful man, cracking his neck before he calmly spoke.

“So we’re just breakin’ shit now, huh. Alright. My fucking turn.”

“I thought you said you'd quit hanging out with him, [_____]! He’s nothing but trouble, have you forgotten he set my roommate’s car on fire?!”

“Tsk. He had it comin’.” Was BAJI’s response, digging through your snack cabinet for a bag of chips. Once he found them, he opened them and began munching away, a bored expression on his face. “Bastard almost ran over Patches, driving around like an asshole. But, he hangs out with you all day, so guess that checks out.”

Referring to one of the building’s stray cats that come around from time to time, you couldn’t help but snort, but you knew he was dead serious—Man doesn’t play about his furry friends.

“Who gives a shit about some stupid-?!” You quickly covered your boyfriend’s mouth before he said anything he’d regret. He wasn’t too pleased, but at least he’d get to keep his teeth.

You exhaled, then directed a frown at the ravenette. “Honestly, I wish you two would try to get along. I think you’d find that you really aren’t so different once you got to know one another.”

“Me? Getting to know that? Fat chance.”

Glaring, your boyfriend ripped away your hand. "Oh, like you're so easy to swallow?"

"Hm, your s/o thinks so."

"Keisuke!"

“The fuck’s that suppose to mean, gutter-trash?” Your boyfriend seethed, turning to you instantly and expecting an explanation. Your eyes were wide, and you waved your hands rapidly to deny the implication. “[_____], what is he talking about?!”

“N-Nothing! God, you always let him get under your skin so easily, Makoto. He’s just being a dick, that’s all…”

Your boyfriend didn’t look convinced in the slightest, brows tight with an upturned lip as he huffed in anger. You shrunk beneath his gaze, stuck without any bandaid words to fix it. Luckily, since Baji was in such a good mood, he decided to relent—It’s no fun when you’re the one suffering the consequences of his crassness. Finishing up the last of the chips, the arsonist crumpled up the bag and tossed it at dude’s face.

“Wha-!”

“Yeah, hot shot, don’t get your panties inna twist. I’m just messin’ with you. We cool?” Baji threw up a fist, fangs on display as he gave an unhinged grin. Makato flinched, but tried to play it off. With hesitancy, your boyfriend eyed the fist with contempt.

“Fuck you. And that ugly-ass cat.”

Probably wasn’t the best thing to say with a fist inches away from his face. Makoto might’ve hesitated; Baji didn’t. So much for getting to keep his teeth.

“You’re a freaking angel, thank you so much for doing this,” MITSUYA gushed, arms snaking around your middle in a warm hug the moment you stepped into the studio. Did he place his hands a little lower than necessary? Maybe.

You chuckled, returning the hug. “Y’know I’d never say no to a free meal."

He had called you for a favor to model a few of his latest designs, needing to make adjustments accordingly before presenting them at the end of the week. His usual canceled on him last minute, putting him in a really tight spot, and you just so happened to be the same size. By offering to buy you dinner for your troubles afterward, it was a win-win for everyone.

Your boyfriend, on the other hand, saw right through Mitsuya. Which was why he so eagerly volunteered to tag along. The lavender-haired designer eyed the guy from over your shoulder, disinterested. "Oh. Didn't know you were bringing him."

"Got a problem with that, Mitsy?"

"Hey now, no bickering you two.” You playfully warned, pulling back from the hug. You fixed Mitsuya an apologetic smile. “I hope it's not too much trouble that he’s here, though. I always tell him how fantastic your designs are, so I guess he wanted to see them for himself. Isn’t that right, Haji?”

Said third-wheel grinned sharply, arms crossed as he sarcastically replied, “Oh, yeah. Can’t wait to watch ya. Very closely.”

Mitsuya deadpanned. But, his brow lessened in weight at the feeling of you tugging on his shirt, pouting at him as your eyes practically dazzled him into compliance. “Please, can he stay?"

It didn't take much for him to cave. Whether you’re aware of it or not, you had the delinquent wrapped around your finger. He sighed, then reluctantly agreed. It’s worth seeing the bright smile on your face, and especially worth the look on Hajime's when you wrapped your arms back around him in gratitude. "Thanks, Taka!"

Mitsuya didn't bother masking the smug grin he shot at your boyfriend, watching him struggle to hold his temper. "Anything for you. But, I’m not paying for his meal."

© 2023-2024 anisespice ッ all rights reserved. likes, comments & reblogs much appreciated!

[ellecdc]

im sorry for my devastating request of angst 😩 but you did them so beautifully and raw that im tearing up now thinking about vixen’s cereal bowl on the sink of their flat 🥲

🧍‍♀️ and because im nothing but a whore for sirius black … idk if ur up for steamy smutty fics (if ur not comfortable pls feel free to ignore!!!) but what about their first time together after the war and everything 👀 while i imagine it’d be fun and exciting, there’d still be some angst and tender moments after everything they’d been through, esp vix 😭 excited to see your take on this if its something you’re comfortable in writing!!

-🩷

Okay...I was like "I've read enough smut, I should be able to write it, right?" 💀 famous last words - I've never written smut before, so I apologize if it's trash. I'll know it's trash if no one ever requests smut again lmfaoooo

CBBH Sirius Black x Vix!Reader - first time after the war

⚠️CW: explicit sexual material, p in v intercourse, fingering, discussion of past non-con/sexual assault, first time having intercourse following non-con/sexual assault

Recommended 18+ // mdni

Sirius was stood up against your back with his arms around you as the two of you looked out into the Street of Grimmauld Place, swaying side-to-side to non-existent music as you watched traffic go by. 

His hands were sat on your hips while his thumbs idly dragged patterns across your skin. His face was positioned in its favourite place – the crook of your neck, as he pressed gentle kisses to the sensitive skin there.

“Sirius?” you asked quietly, interrupting the silence of your little townhouse oasis.

Sirius hummed in response, not lifting his lips from your skin.

“Do you want to have sex?”

Sirius paused all movements, standing stock-still. You turned around in his grasp, so that you were facing him but still in the safety in his arms.

“I’m sorry, can you repeat that?” He said dumbly.

“Do you want to have sex?” you repeated plainly.

Huh, so he had heard you correctly.

“With you?” Oh Godric, someone kill him.

Thankfully, you had the grace to chuckle at his idiocy rather than be offended.

“Well, yes, that’s sort of why I was asking.”

The answer was yes – of course. Always. But it was also far more complicated than that.

Neither you nor Sirius had initiated anything more than sweet kisses and embraces since you returned. Sirius was wary of triggering you or pressuring you into something you were no longer interested in or hurting you unknowingly. 

It took you a few months to regain the majority of your memories from the war, and then a few more months working with both magical and muggle mind healers to begin working through your trauma. Lily had even been able to find a squib psychiatrist for you to see, so that you could discuss the full extent of your trauma without the risk of breaking the statute of secrecy.

All this to say – sex was a major milestone you hadn’t yet made in your journey to returning to ‘normal’.

“Well, of course, love. Yes. Why do you ask?” Sirius asked carefully, understanding this conversation was very important.

You sighed and began chewing on your lips as you looked past Sirius, thoughts apparently miles away.

Sirius used his thumb to gently pull your lip from between your teeth as you gathered the words.

“Because I do, I think. Want to. Have sex, that is.”

Sirius cocked his head at you. “You think?” he asked gently.

“No, I-I do. I... it’s hard to explain.”

“That’s alright, baby. Take your time.” He said as he began to resume rocking the two of you back and forth slightly, rubbing soothing circles on your lower back with his thumbs much like he had before you’d asked the question. 

“We... we used to have fun. I used to like it, having sex with you. And I want to, again. I’m a little scared but...it feels important.”

Sirius didn’t want to diminish your feelings, but he couldn’t help the quick shake of his head as he said, “It’s not important, love. It doesn’t have to be. Especially if you’re scared.” Quite frankly, Sirius would happily become celibate and live his life as a monk if it meant he got to keep you here with him.

You shook your head right back at him. “It’s important to me...the experience it was- it was stolen from me. I want it back; I want that sense of control over that experience again. I want it to be mine – ours - again.” 

“That makes sense.” He offered. You seemed to relax at his acknowledgment, glad to be understood.

“I don’t...I don’t think it’ll be easy.” You admitted shyly.

Sirius raised his hand to brush a lock of your hair behind your ear before placing his hand along your jaw; thumb dragging across your cheek bone whilst his fingers tickled the baby hairs behind your ear.

“That’s okay, beautiful. There’s no rush or penalty, okay? Whatever you want.”

He brought his lips to your forehead and left them there, still rocking you both back and forth like a gentle ship at sea.

“Can we try? Please?” You asked shyly into his chest. 

There was no need to beg, really. As ashamed as Sirius would be to admit it, his cock had been stirring beneath his trousers ever since you brought the idea up.

“Whatever you want, my love.” He repeated as he tilted your face up towards him so that your lips could meet.

They were long, slow kisses, that grew in depth with each parting. Soon, Sirius felt the tip of your tongue brush against his bottom lip, and he tried to suppress the grin that begged to overtake his mouth as he allowed you access into his.

It had been so long; so long since Sirius felt anything like this, so long since he’d done anything remotely intimate with another person, so long since he’d experienced the taste of you. What was before simply gentle twitching and half-soft was quickly become a raging boner in his pants as he continued to kiss you while you backed up towards the bed.

But he would not rush this – he would not, could not – get too excited. This was about you, for you. 

The back of your thighs hit the bed and you slowly sat down. Your chest was heaving slightly, and your lips look so pretty and kiss bitten. Your eyes were somewhat glassy, and Sirius could see the beginnings of trepidation making itself known in your eyebrows as he lowered himself to his knees in front of you.

“Still okay, my love?”

You seemed to shake yourself from some kind of reverie as you nodded at him.

“Yeah?” He breathed, running his hands along your thighs before they migrated to your face, pulling you down towards him for more kisses.

“Can I take this off, pretty girl?” he whispered against your lips as he tugged on the hem of your shirt. You nodded your head yes.

You lifted your arms to help him ease your top over your head before you voluntarily moved to remove your trousers too.

“My beautiful girl.” He spoke in reverence at your form. You sucked in a deep breath and blew it back out, as if comforting yourself.

“Still okay?” Sirius asked.

“I’m okay.”

“You’ll tell me what’s okay? When to stop?”

“I will. Promise.” You agreed with a firm nod of your head.

“I’ve got you, my love.” He promised right back as he leaned back up to reach your face again, kissing you as you began to lay back onto the bed, Sirius following you as he stood between your knees.

Sirius started by gently rubbing his hands across your entire body, looking for signs of potential ‘no-zones’. Though his hands remained nothing but gentle, he noticed you tense when his grip moved over your neck.

Noted. 

He relished in the soft shivers and goosebumps that raised along your skin as his hands roved your body. He’d always found you so beautiful; soft skin with beautiful lightning bolts dotting various points of your body. He took an extra moment to press reverent kisses to the scar on your abdomen that ‘killed you’, the one on your thigh from saving James, and finally, the one on your arm that was used to shame, humiliate, and torture you into give the opposing side information that you refused to give.

Every line, every bruise, every mark; a symbol of your perseverance, your strength, and that you were in fact here – still alive – still his. 

Feeling emboldened by a soft moan that graced your lips as his fingers teased the space just below the waist of your panties, he moved his lips back up to yours.

“Can we take these off?” He spoke between kisses.

You lifted your hips in answer, helping him ease them off of you before he discarded them to the side.

He returned his face to yours, dotting kisses to your lips and face before trailing down the column of your throat. He kept his face there - close to yours for easy access as his fingers teased your folds.

Seemingly surprising to you both, your hips jerked forward in anticipation.

“D'you like this?” He asked into the shell of your ear as your legs opened for him and he began collecting your slick with his fingers, rubbing circles around your clit.

“Yeah.” You all but mewled in response.

“Doing so well, love. So good for me.” He praised as he continued kissing your jaw, sliding his middle finger in with little resistance on your end. 

He continued his ministrations, feeling beyond proud as your body continued to relax in his embrace – trusting him fully.

He slowly worked another finger in, crooking his fingers to find the spot you both were desperate for – he knew he was successful when your back arched to his touch.

“Sirius, there.”

“I know baby, I know.” He cooed, adding a third finger and zeroed in on your g-spot.

“I’m ready. I’m ready.” You panted after some time. “Please, Sirius, I want it – I want you.”

Sirius thought he’d come in his pants right there.

“You sure baby? I don’t want t-”

“Yes.” You moaned emphatically, and who was Sirius to argue?

“Okay, love. I’m right here, you’ve got me.” He said as he stood up to undress himself whilst you moved your body up towards the head of the bed.

Once he was fully unclothed, he slowly made his way to you, kneeling between your legs and leaning his arms down above your head, shielding you within his embrace.

“Still okay?” He whispered as he nudged your nose with his own.

You nodded. “I’m okay. I’m ready.”

Sirius pressed a searing kiss to your mouth as he brought one hand down to his cock, silently casting a quick lubrication charm – not wanting to chance any friction or pain for your first time (back) with him.

He used the tops of his thighs to push your legs up and open a little wider and pressed his tip to your entrance.

“I’ll go slow, okay baby? We’ll take it slow.” He said as he applied a little bit pressure. He ignored the sensational feeling of your heat encompassing him as he watched your face for any signs of discomfort or discontent. 

He got about a quarter of his way in before he paused and brought his arm back up to your head to join the other. He massaged your temples with his thumbs as he pressed kisses into various parts of your face before slowly inching in further. 

You were letting out little puffs of air as he continued to coo at you.

“Doin’ so well love, so good for me.”

“m’doing good.” You murmured through a sigh.

Sirius hummed in agreement as he brushed some damp baby hairs away from your forehead, moving into you slowly until he was finally fully sheathed. He paused – as much for your comfort as for his own self-control (he’d probably die of embarrassment if he came right now) – and watched your face.

“I’m okay.” You repeated in a whisper, eyes shut tight as you turned your face away from him. “I’m okay, I’m okay.”

Sirius started to get anxious – not knowing who you were trying to convince; him, or yourself?

“Baby? Baby, love, look at me. Hey,” Sirius whispered gently, rubbing soothingly at your collarbone. “Look at me love, come ‘ere.”

He gently encouraged your face back towards him as you opened up your glassy eyes to meet his gaze.

You both took some steadying breaths as you held each other’s stare.

“It’s me, baby. It’s just me. I’ve got you, okay? You’re safe.” He promised. Your eyes seemed to clear after a few more breaths.

“I’m sorry.” You whispered. He kissed each of your eyelids in response.

“You have nothing to be sorry for. Are you okay? Do you want to stop?”

“I don’t want to stop.” You said clearly – leaving Sirius no reason to doubt your conviction.

“Okay, I’m gonna move, okay? You tell me what you need, baby, I’ll give it to you.” He promised as he slowly pulled out and pushed back in again.

You both groaned in unison – voices harmonizing in the dark - which made each of you chuckle.

“Oi! Stop wiggling, or this is going to be over before it even started.” He chided which made you laugh even more.

He couldn’t even be mad, seeing you spread out below him, skin glimmering with sweat and a bashful smile on your lips. You were beautiful, ethereal. Sirius was a goner.

He pulled out and moved in again, eliciting another moan from both of you, but you moved on swiftly as he began to pick up a gentle, steady pace.

There was of course an animalistic part of Sirius that was beyond excited at having this back with you; an urge to take you over and over and over again. But somehow, this was perfect, this is exactly what you both needed.

He hated that you felt so broken, he hated that those monsters had hurt you - violated you. But this gentle, sensual reconciliation between your bodies, the open discussion, the gentle kisses that both of you were pressing to the other’s trauma was exactly what you needed.

It felt like more than Sirius entering your body, far deeper than his cock could reach within you. It was slotting puzzle pieces back together that had been ripped away from each other violently.

He’d never let it happen again. 

Sirius’ mouth met yours as your tongues danced with each other. He moved his hands to your arms and pulled them over your head, holding them there as he continued to thrust into you.

You let out a few moans before your mouth pulled away from him, “wait, wait.”

Sirius paused all movements and stayed perfectly still. You tugged on your hands, and he released his grip on your wrists before you pulled your hands down to cover your face – breathing becoming erratic – you were crying. 

“Hey.” He said gently. “I’m sorry love, talk to me. Tell me what’s going on.”

“I’m sorry.” You said from behind your hands.

“Don’t be sorry love – tell me what’s wrong. What can I do?”

“I just felt trapped, I didn’t like it.” You said, lowering your hands but keeping them away from Sirius’ reach. 

“Okay. Okay, I’m sorry – it won’t happen again.” He promised as he slowly brought his thumbs to wipe at your tears as they fell into your hair line.

You blew out a steadying breath as you closed your eyes, relishing in the feeling of Sirius’ gentle hands on your temple as you calmed yourself.

“Do you want to stop?” He asked quietly.

“No.” You assured him with a shake of your head.

“Do you think you’d feel more secure if you were on top?” He asked instead.

You seemed to think about it before making eye contact with him again. “Yeah, maybe. That might help.”

Sirius beamed down at you. “Okay baby, I’ll slide out and we’ll reposition, okay?”

He pulled himself out and you moaned almost pathetically at the loss. He moved to the head of the bed and readjusted the pillows so that he was sat up right before patting his thighs.

“I’m all ready for you, love.” He said as he smiled at you.

You crawled over, looking painfully shy all of a sudden, and Sirius couldn’t help but tease you about it.

“Don’t be going shy on me now, lovely. You were making some of the most beautiful sounds I’d ever heard just moments ago.”

“Sirius!” You whined as you gently swatted his chest.

His smile never faltered as he helped you straddle his lap before easing you back down onto his cock.

“Okay, hang on for a second.” He said as he held your hips in place once you were flush with his, not allowing any movement.

You would have tormented him for this in another life – teasing him for getting too excited, too worked up. But you just smiled down at him lovingly.

Eventually, he looked back up into your eyes and released his hold on your hips, hands supporting you as you began to move up and down on him.

“Atta girl. Fuck, you look so beautiful up there. Gods, how did I ever go without you.” He whispered in awe. His words had your face heating up, and Sirius could see the colour migrate all the way to your chest as you threw your head back. 

He looked down to the place where your bodies connected, watching as he would disappear inside of you over and over and over again. He brought his thumb to your clit and began massaging it, worshipping at the sounds emanating from your mouth.

“Yeah baby? Like that?”

You moaned what he understood as a yes as he brought his other hand to your tit, pinching the nipple there and placing your other nipple in his mouth. Then he sucked hard.

“Oh, fuck!” You keened.

He moaned back as he kept sucking, moving his mouth back and forth to give each of your breast’s equal attention.

“I- oh god. I’m – are you close?” You asked him.

Sirius wasn’t sure how to say that he was close all the way back when you asked him if he wanted to have sex, so he settled for “you have no idea, baby. Why?”

“I’m close.” You cried, moving your hands to his shoulders as you brought your face to his, kissing him passionately. He pulled you forward by the hips so that you were leaning most of your weight on him through your arms, and placed his hands on your ass as he began to thrust himself up into you.

“This okay?” He asked breathlessly.

“Yes.” You moaned.

“You gonna come with me baby? Huh? Come with me, come on beautiful, come with me.” He continued to chant between kisses as your gasps and murmuring turned into one, continuous long moan.

He felt the tell-tale signs of you clenching around him as he picked up his pace, returning pressure to your clit with his thumb.

“Fuck me, beautiful. Oh fuck, come on. Come for me. Come for me.” He begged, working overtime to ward off his own orgasm until you had yours.

He needn’t wait long, however, as his words pushed you over the edge and your careened forward, pushing your face into the crook of his neck as you cried out through your orgasm.

Your walls clenching sealed the deal and had his cock throbbing; coating your cervix with come.  

You both sat gasping, both his cock and your walls twitching with aftershocks every so often as you both came down from your highs. He kissed your shoulders and rubbed your back waiting for you to return to him when he felt a wet spot grow on his shoulder.

“Baby?” He whispered. You sobbed in response.

Fear grappled at him as he felt his heart fall out of his ass. He reared his head back and moved you from his shoulder to find tears staining your face.

“Love! Love, what’s wrong?” He whispered, completely horrified at your distress.

You smiled sadly and let out some laughs. “I’m sorry, I’m not sad.”

Sirius felt his stomach unclench and felt like he could throw up in relief.

“I did it.” You whispered mostly to yourself.

Suddenly, he understood.

This was a milestone. This was not just a small step towards normality – this was a huge accomplishment. This was bigger than accepting help, this was bigger than talking to a therapist, this was bigger than all of it.

This was you taking back control. This was you taking something that terrified you, but persevering because it was important to you that you have it. This was you being nervous but advocating for yourself the entire way through. 

Sirius felt like his soul would combust from the amount of pride he felt for you. Every time he was certain he loved you as much as any person could possibly love someone, you go and do something fucking phenomenal, and he’s left to rearrange his entire being to accommodate the amount of love coursing through his veins.

He'd happily do that for the rest of his life. 

“You did.” He agreed, pushing back pieces of your hair from your face.

“I didn’t...I didn’t think I could.” You admitted.

Sirius shook his head. “I did.”

“You did?”

“Mhm.”

“How?”

Sirius scoffed as if you said something completely ridiculous. “Because, for as long as I’ve known you, you’ve never not been able to do something you set your mind to.”

You beamed at him. “Stubborn.”

“Tenacious.” He said as he pinched your side. 

“Obstinate.” 

“Mine.”

Your teasing smile turned soft. “Yours.” You agreed which was quickly followed by a yawn.

Sirius gently massaged your sides as he slowly lifted your weight up and his softening cock slipped out of you.

“Let’s go clean up so we can go to bed.” He said as he stamped a kiss to your temple. 

You took turns lathering soap on the other’s body and enjoyed the spray of the warm water as you swayed to more nonexistent music and shared tender kisses. He was being unbelievably soft with you, but he knew if he allowed his joy, excitement, and pride to overcome him; he’d have you bent in half against the shower wall.

You’d come a long way, but he was quite sure you weren’t there yet.

That was fine by him though; you had the rest of your lives to work your way there.

...

James made his way down the hall as he carried a muggle frozen dinner in his hands, re-reading the instructions on the back.

He knocked on your and Sirius’ bedroom door but didn’t wait for a response before he opened it up.

“Hey, do you think we can cook this magically since we don’t have a mic-or-oh-wave? Lily said no, but I thought-” He paused as he saw you and Sirius, both with damp hair under the covers intertwined in each other’s embrace.

He realized then that the room smelt warm and... heady...

“Oh my gods. Did you guys have sex!?” He squealed loud enough to wake the entire house.

“PRONGS!” 

[redclercs]

DELICATE✰ CHARLES LECLERC.

vi. do i really have to tell you how he brought me back to life?

— the one where he ain't reading what they call you lately.

warnings: anxiety tics and symptoms, i–unironically–listened to the lakes a lot while writing this. 3k words.

masterlist ✢ next

By Marie Nichols

The first news we got about actress y/n y/ln's new romance came at the start of this month, when she was seen at the Miami Grand Prix with Ferrari's sponsor Elix. What appeared to be only rumors, since y/n and Ferrari driver Charles Leclerc were single at the same time, have been confirmed little by little.

Although it is not like y/n to soft-launch a relationship, she's been hinting at it for several weeks now. From staring lovingly at her new boyfriend as he receives the winner's trophy in Monaco's Grand Prix to instagram posts saying she 'feels like a princess', the last confirmation we needed came yesterday when Twitter went crazy over user @/formulacharles' picture of the new couple, on a romantic date around Monaco.

Opinions are divided on this couple as both #y/nIsOverParty and #YNCHARLES trended at the same time. Most of the negative views on this flourishing romance come from Aidan Kim's fans, who claim it has been happening since before Kim and y/ln broke up around March after dating for three years.

We have gathered some of the best tweets from both sides, to help us make up our minds about the whole situation.

❝@/aidankimluv: I can't believe y/n is rubbing her new relationship in everyone's faces like this! she can't be single and it shows❞

❝@/gr4ndekim: the timing still rubs me off the wrong way, this has been happening for way longer than she wants us to know❞

❝@/ynselixcan I need y'all to touch grass for a second and realize men and women can be friends, and if they are dating it's none of your business anyway❞

❝@/leclercsdiary: they are cute together but tbh without knowing much about y/n... i don't want her to mess with charles' head❞

We are still hoping for an official confirmation, although pictures speak for themselves. Will y/n ever be brave enough to admit she dumped Aidan Kim for a Formula 1 pilot? We'll keep you updated!

FROM F1GOSSIPXO ON TIKTOK: "FANS CAUGHT Y/N AND CHARLES ON A DATE IN MONACO"

[text to speech assistant voice]: ❝(...) someone on twitter took this picture of them at a famous rose garden in Monaco and the second clip is charles dropping y/n off back at her hotel. i guess all the rumors are true and we have a new grid couple... a frankly problematic couple at that.❞

May 30th, Montecarlo, Monaco.

It was, in all honesty, a little dumb to believe that you could keep it lowkey if you were going to hang out with Charles.

First, Victoria who normally remembers close to nothing about the nights she gets drunk, remembered perfectly the 'moment' you shared with Charles when he offered to show you around. The whole rebound conversation happened again, much to your dismay.

Then, there was the car. Charles' custom Pista Spider is quite literally, the opposite of lowkey and apparently the only option he was willing to offer for you two to move around Monaco.

Which makes perfect sense, no matter how much you hate it.

There was also the timing. Which was really, really bad, and you blame your ignoring this on the fact that you had a lot to drink the night you said yes to his offer. On a normal basis Charles is the most sought after person in Monaco, him being the Grand Prix winner from two days before, multiplied the attention by a million.

Yet when he called you on Monday night to make sure you were still up for the next day, you couldn’t find it in yourself to say no. He was being nice and friendly, and you had no reason to deny him other than the anxiety you felt in the back of your neck every time you thought about what people would say if they found out.

And people would find out, sooner or later.

But you are not committing a crime, you tell yourself in front of the mirror. Charles is becoming your friend, which is something you really, really need at this point in your life. Granted, befriending the guy that you’re tangled up in rumors with isn’t the best idea, it’s neither your fault nor his.

So you take a deep breath and fix your hair for the last time before leaving your hotel room. Charles called you a few minutes before to let you know he is waiting in the lobby, and you can feel your palms sweating already.

Charles is nodding attentively to a child with a Ferrari cap who is telling him all about his Monaco GP experience when you step out of the lift.

He waves at you, and his eyes register your appearance in seconds before they return to the child.

“This is my friend y/n,” he tells the little boy as you approach. “She’s a huge Ferrari fan, too.”

The boy smiles brightly and his focus shifts to you, asking what your favorite part of the Grand Prix was and whether you think they can win in Spain. You give him the best answer you can come up with, that the best part was seeing Charles win (to which both Charles and the boy smile) and that yes, you believe it’s Carlos’ turn to win his home race.

Once Charles finishes signing his merch and he makes sure the kid has returned to his parents safely, his whole attention is devoted to you.

“You are really pretty,” he smiles, his accent coming out in the way he pronounces “pretty”.

Lowkey is the word of the day, and that’s also what you had in mind when picking your outfit. A sage green sundress with matching short-heeled shoes. Nothing too garish, but that still makes you feel confident.

“Thank you, you look good yourself.”

It’s a half-assed compliment that comes out of your mouth out of sheer anxiety. He looks incredibly handsome in a light blue shirt that brings out the blue in his eyes and a decent pair of jeans instead of the horrible ones he wore on Sunday.

Charles smiles wider, "Thank you, y/n."

You bite the inside of your cheek in embarrassment, and Charles' eyes go small in amusement.

"Are you ready?" he asks, ending your torment as you feel heat creep up your neck. Charles hesitates in offering his arm to you, and instead puts his palm out for you to walk in front of him.

You nod, starting the walk towards the exit. His car is right outside the door to the hotel, and there are people surrounding it, taking pictures and craning their necks to look inside. It's your turn to hesitate as you stop in your tracks, Charles' chest millimeters away from your body as he comes to an abrupt stop and avoids crashing into you.

"Let me," he says, his semblance more serious as he moves you aside gently. The doorman nods at him and opens the door.

Your anxiety rises as Charles leads you out of the hotel, apologizing in both French and Italian about not taking pictures as he opens the car door for you.

He continues smiling and saying 'thank you' and 'i'm sorry' as he walks around the car, to the driver's seat and climbs inside. The car offers little protection from the outside, but you're grateful for whatever refuge. It's not like you to act like this, but wherever your name appears on the internet lately is full of vile stuff. The mere thought of it makes your hands shake, you're afraid of what they're going to say this time.

"Are you okay?" he asks softly, watching you put your hands on your lap, palms down so the skirt of the dress wipes your sweat.

"Yeah, I'm fine," you reassure, more to yourself than to him. "Where are we going?"

"You'll see," Charles smiles again, shoulders relaxing as he steers the car away from the crowd.

You look at him, feigning insecurity and he frowns for a moment before you chuckle. "Don't worry, I love surprises."

"What do you think of Monaco so far?" he asks, squeezing the wheel a couple times. If you didn't know better, you'd think he is nervous too.

"Are you kidding? It's beautiful. The Grand Prix was something else, and everywhere I look there's luxury." You gesture around, but the prime example is the car you're riding right now, and the driver who's wearing a $2 million watch.

Charles laughs and nods, "It never stops being beautiful, no matter how much time you spend here. I miss it every time I'm away."

You understand. Because you miss New York so much, it doesn't matter how overrated people say it is. It's become your home and you hate being away from it, especially considering the circumstances that exiled you.

The very good thing about Monaco is that car rides are short. So when you get to your destination, you've barely had time to make things awkward with small talk.

You wait patiently for him to walk to your door and open it once you’ve parked. Charles has put on a pair of sunglasses and you think it’s a shame you can’t see his blue eyes anymore. You discard this thought immediately though, you’re not going to think like this about someone you’re befriending.

“So?” You ask taking his hand as he helps you out of the car. “What place were you so keen on showing me?”

Charles holds on to your hand for a moment too long, and you stare down at them. He lets go, repeating the gesture from earlier to let you walk in front.

“It’s a rose garden,” he begins explaining, leaning a bit forward so he doesn’t raise his voice. “The Princess’ Rose Garden, I saw your picture saying you felt like a princess. I thought you would like it.”

You turn around to face him and this time he isn’t quick enough to avoid crashing in to you. So much for an F1 Pilot’s reflexes.

“You’re not allergic to flowers are you?” He questions, the panicked undertone makes you smile. “y/n?”

“No!” You throw your head back laughing, “I just think it’s adorable how you related the ideas.”

There is a newly installed shade of pink in Charles’ cheeks and he runs a hand through his hair, sheepish. “Well, I’m glad I got it right.”

Your cheeks hurt from smiling and you are genuinely so excited so clap your hands a little. “The Princess’ Rose Garden! Let’s go!”

Charles still lets you lead, following wherever you go and translating whatever signs aren’t in English already. He too, is genuinely happy to see you so bubbly and excited as you marvel at the colors of the flowers and the arches, and the statues. He’s proud of himself for picking the right place.

“Let me take a picture of you,” he says, as you walk through a white arch speaking excitedly about how this reminds you of Alice in Wonderland. “y/n?”

You look at him over your shoulder with a smile and he snaps the picture before you can react properly or pose.

“Oh no Charles, delete that!” You whine, walking back to him to look at his phone.

“No, you look perfect,” he replies, showing you his screen. “See?” He does not regret a word that has come out of his mouth and it makes you pause, face warming up at the statement.

“Let me take a picture of you, then,” you say, pointing him towards the arch. He’s quick to comply, walking towards the arch and smiling at you, without looking at the camera.

You show him the screen of your phone and he seems satisfied with the picture, as he doesn’t ask you to retake it.

“Should we go down to the lake?” He asks signaling down the path.

You nod, putting your phone back in your purse and resisting the temptation to look at the notifications that crowd your lock screen.

Charles takes your hand once again as you arrive at the lake.

"You might slip in the grass," he explains, clearing his throat.

"Right," you chuckle, but he's right, the little hill you have to pass to get to the edge of the lake looks like a worthy rival to your heels. You know who'd be losing. "Thanks."

You sit down so close your shoulders are touching, but neither moves or speaks for a few minutes. Taking in the way the golden hour falls in the garden, the sun reflects off the surface of the lake and colors your face amber.

You're glad Charles has removed his sunglasses, because you can see his eyes again. The green is more visible now thanks to the golden in the environment.

"Thanks for bringing me here," you finally break the silence, "I really like it."

"I'm glad, y/n," he says, both dimples showing as he smiles. "I'm sorry I couldn't show you more places, though."

All Monday and a big part of today he was busy with interviews and photoshoots, all to celebrate his breaking the Monaco curse. You don't mind, he deserves to be celebrated.

"Maybe another time," you add.

"Whenever you want," his smile widens, and you have to look away from him. Your brain is swarmed in thoughts of how pretty he is, and you wish you could just leave it blank for a minute or two. "Thank you for agreeing to come."

The impulse of saying something that will ruin the mood is greater than your self-control, and curiosity keeps eating you from the inside since last Thursday.

"Can I ask you a question?"

Charles nods calmly, resting his chin on his hand as he faces you. "Anything."

"Do you really not care about... well, what everyone is saying?"

Charles tilts his head slowly, and frowns. "About what?"

"Me. You. Us." you whisper the last word, embarrassed. It feels a lot like 'Us' means something completely different than just being thrown together in a hurriance of wild rumors and lies.

"I don't," Charles doesn't even hesitate, "I don't read all of that. Carlos keeps me up to date, which is ridiculous."

You pinch your thigh lightly, ashamed that even his teammate knows everything that's been said about you.

It's the first time all evening that Charles wishes he could take his words back. "What I mean," he continues quickly, "Is that I don't let people on the internet form my opinion on someone, you, especially."

You return your gaze to him, "I'm sorry people have dragged you into this."

"You don't have to apologize for things that aren't your fault, y/n."

"Well, it does feel like it's my fault." You admit, and you hate the way your eyes sting, you don't want to cry in front of Charles. You really are ruining the whole mood.

"Is there anything you'd like me to do?" Charles is more serious now, trying to catch your avoidant eyes as you blink the tears away. "Something you want me to say? Because I will."

You shake your head no. You don't want him to actively participate in this mess, it's a PR nightmare and Ferrari and him have enough on their plates already.

"Unless you want to say something, Charles."

"There is a lot I want to say," he mutters through gritted teeth, and you're not quite sure what he means.

"I'm sorry."

"Stop apologizing," he repeats, more lighthearted this time. "And stop whatever it is that you're reading about yourself, too."

"I'm not—"

Charles shuts you down with a look, there is no point in lying to him when, like Mati, he's weirdly capable of seeing right through you.

"You're sweet and talented, and hard-working, and many other positive things I'm hoping to continue witnessing first-hand." He speaks so fast his accent slips in several words.

"Thank you." you say sincerely, and you reach for his hand for the first time ever, giving it a squeeze before letting it go, something he accepts albeit reluctantly.

You sit together for a while longer, the awkwardness from your previous moments together alone is a distant idea, as you don't need to fill the silence anymore. Charles doesn't make your hands sweat in the way that feels wrong, your fingers don't prickle or go numb, your heartbeat—although fast—doesn't make your chest feel tight.

It's okay, you remind yourself, Charles likes you enough.

"Hello?" you're taking your shoes off, holding the phone between your ear and your shoulder.

"y/n!" Vic yells, making you wince, your phone clatters to the floor and you're glad the rug breaks the fall. "Are you back from your date?"

"It was not a date, Vic," you opt to put her on speakerphone, "And yes, I'm back."

"How was it? I saw on Twitter that you were in a garden? Was it cute?"

You sigh, of course this is on Twitter already. "Vic, I'm so serious right now, stop with the Twitter stuff."

"Sorry y/n," she sighs, her tone like a regretful child apologizing to their mom. "But my timeline is just full of them, honestly, I wish I could just reply to people and tell them to back off."

"Just ignore them, please, Vic,"

"I promise. But how was it, your not date?"

"It was great," you immediately regret the sigh that escapes your lips. "Charles is very nice, and the place was super pretty. We went to dinner after which was pretty cool too."

"That is a date, y/n," Vic giggles, "That's amazing! I'm glad you had a good time."

"Thank you," you let yourself fall back on the bed. It was not a date. The anxiety that Charles had helped soothe is back now, it feels like cold water running down your back. "What about you, what did you do today?"

It's 10 pm in Monaco, which means it's around 1 pm in Los Angeles.

Vic starts going off about her day, how she hates the smell of the new face cream she was supposed to release to the public two weeks ago, her trip to the gym with Holly and that other girl whose name you finally learn again—Deanna.

"When are you coming back to LA?" she asks.

You're picking up your stuff from around the room, you have to take a flight tomorrow and you'd rather sleep in, than wake up early to finish your packing.

"Soon I hope," you yawn. It makes no difference to you, spending time in hotel rooms and Vic's house, neither are home. So you're not rushing to go back to her.

"y/n, you promised you'd be here for the opening of the store," Vic is serious now. "You promised."

Closing your eyes, you battle that uncomfortable feeling on your hands. You're sure that you won't get any proper sleep if it doesn't go away.

The opening of Vic's first Presley Beauty store is on Friday, the same Friday you're going to be in Spain.

"I know Vic, I'm sorry. But I have to be with Elix, violating a contract at this point is not a good idea."

"Babe, you said you'd be the ambassador for the first store. People will come if you're there!"

You're not too sure of that right now. Maybe people would show up to throw tomatoes at you, if anything.

"I really am sorry, Vic."

She falls silent on the other side for a few minutes, and you continue packing, waiting for her to gather her feelings. You know you're in the wrong here, breaking a promise to your best friend, but you'd rather not mess up the only job you have right now. Plus, you are certain the publicity her very first store would get from you wouldn't be a good one right now.

"Okay, apology accepted," Vic exhales so hard it makes the microphone crackle. "But you do have to come to the store later, PROMISE ME."

"I promise. I'll be back in LA next Monday and I'll go straight to your store and steal everything."

Vic laughs and you're glad her anger has vanished.

"I'll call you tomorrow, okay? After I land in Spain."

"Sure babes," Vic is her cheerful self again, "Have fun and also, say hello to Charles for me."

You roll you eyes. "Bye Vic, love you."

"I love you too, babe."

For the first time in days, you turn your phone off before getting ready for bed. You are not going to scroll endlessly through hashtags with your name. You're not going to read what they're calling you lately, because your friends—at least some of them— aren't.

─── team principal radio: ❝hello hello, thank you for reading! i hope you've enjoyed this chapter. The slow burn is slow burning friends. I would love to know your thoughts.♡❞

✰ paddock club members: @sassyheroneckgiant @flowerchild-96 @fangirlika @shegotboreddsoo @roseamongthorns13 @cissyp @chimchimjiminie16 @saturnsrinqs @roni-midnights @gayyvodka6 @studioreader @its-ash-not-grey @lu-morningstar-2 @ferraribabe @reidsworld @feelslikestrawberries @celestialams @kosmosgalore @heesung-baby @missenclod @buendiabebeta @mycenterfold @aces-tattooartist @burningrred @you-bleed-just-toknowyouarealive @rainybabe25 @ru-kru @lazybot @teenagedreams-cl

want to join the paddock club? click here!

[loserboy-futterman]

Hey,hi! If possible could I request a Derek Danforth x bottom male reader (smut if it’s not a problem) story where Reader is a spy sent to gain Derek trust and obtain information about the last scandal that happened but ends up falling under Derek charm? Thanks <3

Derek Danforth x Male!Reader

A/N: thank you sm for giving me my first request on this account, there for christening it with smut. Enjoy! also this was so fun to write and i made reader like an fbi agent, i hope thats alright<3

-Wolf in Sheep's clothing-

Word Count: 2.9k

Warning!! 18+ content ahead!! Gay porn ahead!!

includes; rimming, degrading, praise, anal sex, skimpy outfits

This was already a nightmare.

You were a detective, a man of law and justice. Someone who took down the bad guys and saved the day! A man that could be trusted to keep you safe.

But today? Today you were a 'dancer' at a sleezy night club. How does that happen you may ask? All thanks to billionaire brat, Derek Danforth.

Your mission was to get close to Derek and get him vulnerable, get him to tell you his secrets and expose his company. Then, destroy him and throw him behind bars. Should be easy enough. If only.

You adjusted the entirely too small tube top you had on and tried to pull the tiny shorts down so your junk wasn't almost popping out. Huffing, you set your eyes on the night club, scanning the dark room as you tried to find Derek's famous blonde mullet. It was hard to see anything with all the people, so you began moving swiftly through the crowd, scanning tables and booths. Trying to get a glance at everyone without drawing too much attention. You make your way through most of the club until he's there. You spot Derek sitting at a booth in a far corner of the club, sprawled out to take up half the space. Surprisingly, he's more alone then you initially thought he'd be. Instead of being surrounded by beautiful men and women, he's only got his number two by his side. The two are talking in hushed whispers when you walk up to the booth and slide in, sitting right up against Derek.

"Lookin' awfully lonely over here gentlemen, care for some company?" You could vomit at how high and bubbly your voice sounded, completely foreign to how you usually talk.

Derek's assistant was the first one of the pair to look up at you, clearly uncomfortable with another person around during their sensitive conversation. "No, no- thanks." He muttered quickly, trying to wave you off as he shifted in his seat, trying not to look at your scandalous outfit.

"I wasn't really asking you." Your attention is on Derek, whom, has been looking at his phone until now. His head picks up when he starts to feel you scoot closer to him. His dark eyes trace down your form quickly, making you feel even more exposed.

Derek lean his body towards you before wrapping his arm around your hip, pulling you tight against him. "He can stay, gimme something to look at." Derek leans down to you, giving you a shark-like grin and looking deep in your eyes. He stayed there for a moment as you stiffened under his gaze. You could slap him, but instead you wrap your arms around his neck and smile. "Don't let me interrupt your conversation then."

This is working out perfectly! You knew Derek would be an easy target.

Derek gave you a lazy grin as he pulled away and hit his vape. He blew a few clouds that smelt awful before turning back to the other man, who was frankly, very upset by your presence. If you didn't know any better, you'd say he liked Derek.

"How much are we bringing in?" Derek broke the tense silence as he rolled his head to look at him. The man tensed and you focused your eyes on Derek's hair as you played with it, trying to convince them you weren't listening, only here to jump Derek's bones.

"48." He said stiffly, eyeing you suspiciously. This answer seemed to only upset Derek though as he took a harsh hit of his vape and barked at his employee.

"48 what? Thousand? Million?! Don't fuck with my money!"

Derek's aggressive behavior was a little surprising but not completely unexpected. You had read in his file he was prone to anger spouts, especially when he was high. You decided to use this to your advantage to drive Derek further into your arms.

You began by carding your fingers through his soft hair and whispering soft coos in his ear to calm him down. His chest rises and falls heavily and you seem to cut through his drug-addled mind.

"T-thousand Derek." He replied nervously, shifting uncomfortably as he watched you two.

If Derek was upset before, now he was full of rage. He clenched his jaw tight and his grip around you was almost bruising. Derek let out a deep sigh and glared at his business partner. Even you felt a little shudder run down your spine at the intimidation.

"Go." Derek growled and his partner was quick to scurry off and out of sight. You can't help but let out a laugh as he leaves but Derek's quick to turn his glare on you. "What's so funny?"

"Well, your friend is kind of pathetic." You reply simply with another laugh and it seems to actually lighten Derek up. He chuckles himself and puts on a casual mask even though you can tell he's still tense. His leg is bouncing and you're surprised his vape hasn't exploded yet from over use.

"He really is." Derek tilts his head back and you let your eyes trace down his neck. You can't deny he's handsome but you know what he does and he has no remorse. You clench your jaw and throw a bare leg over his lap. He's quick to run his calloused hand up and down your smooth calf.

"So what do you do, hm? Making millions?" You ask with fake innocence and curiosity. Derek keeps his eyes on the hand stroking your leg like he's mesmerized. Drugs, you think.

Finally he shrugs and looks at you, his eyes softer than you've ever seen them. "I run a software company." He smirks and leans in closer to you, nuzzling his nose and face close into your neck. The sudden closer contact makes you flush and you want to push him away but it's for your job. And maybe, it felt kind of nice to feel Derek's warm breath fan over your neck. "I wanna know about you. You charge?"

You simple shrug and shake your head at him. "No. I'm just here for a good time. Although, a quieter place would be nice." You need to get more information, you need to get him alone and you can snoop around his house.

Derek pulls back from your neck and eyes you for a long moment, trying to decipher your intentions. After a moment, he slowly nods and smiles. "Let's go baby boy." Derek stands (stumbles) up and you follow him up and out of the club. His driver is waiting outside and you both crawl into the back of his limo.

The quiet feels like a breath of fresh air until you remember you're now alone with Derek Danforth, your target. You're both sitting close in the limo but Derek's mind seems to be elsewhere entirely. He's chewing his nails and glaring out the window, clearly stuck in his own head.

"Are you.. okay?" You ask sweetly, causing Derek to look at you and snap back to the present. He shakes his head and grabs your hand.

"Fine sugar. Just worried about my Bitcoin stock is all." Derek grunted out, shifting closer to you, clearly needing more physical touch.

You needed to get him to open up and stop giving these vague answers, even giving plain lies. "You can tell me anything Derek. I won't tell. My trade is in secrets." You cup his cheeks and make him look deep into your eyes.

Derek seems to think about his answer for a long moment before finally the dam breaks. "My stupid company isn't making enough money, even though I trained those stupid fucks myself." He suddenly growls, clenching his fists tight.

Finally, he was cracking. "How come they're not making enough?" You tilt your head and watch him go to reply but the limo comes to a stop and it seems you've arrived at his apartment.

Derek's quick to pull you upstairs to his penthouse apartment and it's absolutely stunning. He pulls you in and makes his way towards the dry bar in the living room. You watch as he pours a shot of expensive whiskey and shoots it. He immediately makes a face and you snicker at him behind your hand.

He glares at you but it doesn't hold much malice. Derek rounds the bar and stands in front of you. He wraps his arm around your waist and leans down close. You can smell the whiskey on his breath but it's almost enticing, instead of gross like usual. "Okay Mr. Chuckles. Tell me your secrets then." He smirks down at you, making your cheeks heat up.

"Well Derek... My secret is..." You lean in closer to him, almost closing the gap but stopping an inch away. "... I think your kinda cute." You admit and it really was true.

Derek is quick to quirk his eyebrow and give you his usual sarcasm. "Just cute? Are you sure?" His voice is filled with confidence and before you know it, he closes the gap between you, capturing your lips in a hungry kiss. It seemed Derek didn't know how to go slow or be gentle because he immediately kissed you hard and bit down on your bottom lip.

You know you shouldn't be making out with Derek Danforth but it was all for the mission, to get closer and get more information out of him. It definitely didn't have to do with the growing erection in your tiny shorts. Derek bruised and bit at your lips, sliding his hands down until they rested on the waistline of the small shorts.

Derek was the first to pull away but he still kept his mouth busy as he trailed kissed down your jaw and to your neck. "Jump." Its a simple command but it takes your brain a moment to register through the haze. You jumped up, wrapping your legs around Derek's hips and tangling your arms around his neck. The new position let Derek control the situation as he started to bite harder on your neck, leaving distinct marks. Not that you minded in this moment.

"So fuckin' pretty baby. Cute little outfit too, you okay if i ruin it?" Derek rasped in your ear and bit your earlobe softly. The deep rumble of his voice made you shiver and you chewed on your lip, contemplating if letting Derek fuck you was a good idea. What would you put in your official report? It was getting harder to think as Derek kept working on your neck and moved to push you against the wall, grinding his hips against yours. His green silk pants left nothing to the imagination when he got hard. You groaned softly and dropped your head back against the wall as Derek ground his hips harder. "Well baby? Wont do anything without a yes. Not that you need to say yes."

Derek was now looking at you with those big puppy dog eyes and you could tell he was being genuine. You decide you need more information and this is how to do it. You lean in and capture his lips again, bucking against his own hips and savoring the whine he lets out.

"Ruin it Derek." You mumble against his lips, making him moan loudly. He pushed you harder into the wall, supporting you with his hips and legs so his hands were free to literally rip off the thin tube top you had on. Your nipples pebbled at the cold air and you hissed softly but it trailed into a moan when Derek's warm mouth was on you. He sucked and licked at one pec, fondling the other as he moaned almost more than you were.

You tangled your fingers in his blonde hair and tugged him closer, earning you a high pitched whimper. Derek's hand trailed down your chest and to your stomach, groping it softly before sliding down to grab your cock that's straining the tiny shorts.

"Maybe if i tease you a little more, you'll break these sorry excuse for shorts." He chuckled cruelly and grabbed your cock tight making you whine and squirm in his grip.

"Derek, please." It felt so good but it wasn't enough, far from it and it was driving you insane and he knew it.

"What? What do you want baby? Want me to fuck you until you cry huh? Fuckin slut." Derek hissed the name at you but it made you shiver. You hated how he was talking to you but you fucking loved it, you hated that fact too. His words dripped with cruelty and lust.

You felt so tense and you needed him so much. "Yes!" You surprised yourself with that scream and you shifted your hips against him hard. Derek smirked and grabbed your hips tight to still your movements. He took you to his bed and dropped you on the plush mattress as he stood before you. He quickly tore off his shirt and whipped off his pants, clearly just as desperate as you.

Derek quickly crawled back over you and kissed your chest, leaving hickeys and bruises as his hands hold your hips tight against his. The new skin on skin contact makes fire run through your veins and everywhere Derek touched seemed to be more sensitive than ever.

In a flash, Derek had flipped you on to your stomach and hiked up your ass to meet his cock that was leaking through his Calvin Klein boxers. He growled low in his throat and slid his hips against yours before finally pulling your shorts off and freeing your painfully hard cock. You hissed at how sensitive it was but didn't have time to focus on that as Derek's finger tips prodded gently at your hole. He leaned over your back to whisper in your ear.

"You look so good baby... Mind if I have a taste?" His voice dripped with pure lust.

You nodded, not trusting your own voice and not exactly understanding what he meant until you felt something warm and wet against your hole. You gasped and looked back to meet Derek's dark eyes as he licked and lathered your hole.

"D-Derek!" You shuddered again as Derek winked before plunging his tongue as deep into your hole as he can, rapidly fucking you with his mouth. You cry out and your cock drips pre-cum on the bed like a fountain, showing you were close.

He grabs your ass tight in both hands, pulling away with spit covering his lips and dripping down his chin. He looked like a hungry predator as he wiped his face with his hand and stood up behind you. Derek grabs your hips tight and leans his sweaty chest against your back, pushing you further into the bed.

"You're perfect baby boy. Might just have to keep you." He mumbled into your neck, wrapping one arm around your chest as he angled his cock and began sliding into your wet hole. You panted and whined at the stretch as his head slides in. Derek's hips stop but its clear he's struggling to hold back in a failing attempt to keep teasing you.

"Fuck! I-I cant- i need to fucking ruin you now."

That's all the warning you got before Derek's hips are slamming into yours, shoving his cock all the way inside you and punching the air out of your lungs. Derek cant stop himself from rutting and bucking his hips against you already but every movement feels too good. You moan out and grab the sheets tight in your fists as Derek works his cock in and out of you faster and harder.

He wasn't kidding about ruining you as his hand on your chest wrapped softly around your throat, not applying pressure but it still made your eyes roll back. Especially as he desperately pistoned his hips inside of you, grazing your prostate every so often, making you see spots. Derek panted and moaned in your ear, a mix of praise and degrading words falling from his lips.

"That's it. Fuck yeah, so tight baby."

"Such a hungry fuckin whore f'me."

"Fuuuck, baby, yes, god fuck-!"

You felt your end approaching fast as Derek kept moving and his moans turned to high whines and whimpers, showing he was close too. His pace grew sloppy and your cock rubbed against the bed, making you finally see white and arch your back in the most toe-curling orgasm you've had in a long time.

Derek's let out the sweetest moan when you tightened around him and it was impossible for him not to spill his load inside of you. He gave a few more hard thrusts until he was collapsing against you and panting hard. You grunted under his weight but you didn't attempt to move after that.

"Stay with me?" Derek's gruff voice broke the silence as he nuzzled his nose into your neck again.

You nodded and shifted slightly under him. It seemed this mission would take longer than expected but you don't mind so much.

Derek kissed your shoulder lightly. "Sounds good... Officer."

Shit.

[spliffymae]

WRITTEN OFF.

synopsis: you know, there’s a reason the famous saying is “absence makes the heart grow fonder”

⚠️ swearing, mentions of cheating, smut, car sex, the words “cock”, “panties” and “pussy” are used here lmao. minors dni 18+ !

kio’s notes - THIS IS THE FINAL PART. this was also my 100th post 🥹

pts. 1 , 2 , 3 , 4

now playing

⊱ ──────── {.⋅ ♫ ⋅.}──────── ⊰

you were quiet on the drive to your house, toji even worrying about you. the makeup you spent hours on had run from your tears. you didn’t bother wiping it, you just sat with your head against the window and accepted it.

instead of turning to your street, toji continued to drive past. you noticed and sat up. “you missed the turn.” you said softly, looking at the side of your ex’s face. but he didn’t seem to care.

“toji….my house—”

“going to mine.” he mumbled. he knew megumi and rin had long left, and he wanted to reconcile tonight without the pressure of the kids, and the possibility megumi could hear you two.

you took a deep breath, “toji, i agreed for you to drive me home. your house is not my home.”

“(y/n), megumi is sixteen right now. do you know how old he was when you first watched him?…nine. we started dating when he was ten. i proposed to you when he was thirteen, and—.”

“cheated when he was 16.” you added a bitter chuckle, “s’that where you were going with that bit?”

toji couldn’t take it anymore!

as if an instinct, a reflex, he jerked the car off the road and pulled over on the shoulder, startling you. “what the fuck!”

he didn’t say anything. he cut the engine and turned his attention to you, leaning over the cars console to be closer. “i am sick of this! sick of your attitude, of this separation, of this disconnect. you are my wife, (y/n). and we are going to work this out because i cannot lose you, okay? i won’t lose you. i know you want to, i see it when you look at me. yeah, you hate me and want me away, but i see the part of you that craves me, our family back together. so let’s work on it. let me prove i can be who you need me to be, who you want me to be.”

it was quiet. you were processing. toji rarely spoke like this, at most you saw this side of him after sex. this softer side. “(y/n)…” toji put his hand on your thigh, getting your leg to tense up from his touch. you bit back the sob that tried to crawl it’s way out your mouth. you had new tears running down your cheeks, trying your best to blink them away. how his touch was able to bring you to tears, you don’t know. but it was a mix of emotions: happy to feel his warmth back on your body; sad to know you weren’t as over him as you thought; pissed to know he probably touched the other woman like this.

his other hand stretched over to cup your cheek and turn your head to him. you didn’t look at him, you stared at his hand on your thigh. “mama, i’m so sorry.” his voice was shaky, and that made you finally look up to see he had the glossiest of eyes.

he was sober enough to drive—he had driven home in worse conditions then two and a half mugs of beer, but his emotions were all over the place. you always had a way of bringing out his vulnerability. and while usually he would wait ‘til after you two climaxed to relish in his feelings with you, his tears burned his eyes now. you hadn’t seen him cry since rin’s birth, but seeing you this way and knowing he was the cause was cracking his guilt ridden heart.

he pulled your head to him and as your foreheads touched, he realized you were allowing him to touch you. to be closer to you. “i meant when i said i hate you. i want you to feel every burning pain i felt in my heart.” you were angry, your voice was shaky, and you glared at him as if he were the last person you’d want to be with. and quite frankly, he was. “i want to break you the way you broke me.”

toji let out a nervous sigh. he didn’t remove himself from you, though. “and the most annoying thing is i can’t.” you shrugged in defeat, a watery smile on your face. “i can’t bring myself to hurt you that way because no one deserves that. and i know now that i didn’t deserve that.” you sniffled, “i was everything you needed me to be. i gave you everything, fushiguro.”

his thumb swipes at the tear stains on your cheek, gently wiping them away. he gave you a peck on your lips. it was one that turned to two, and then three. he prompted you to kiss him back, but you held your ground.

until he began to lead his kisses from your lips to your jaw. you instinctively tilted your head so he had more space to kiss you. his eyes shone with hope at your action. “you were and you didn’t deserve it, baby. m’so sorry. just…break me back, (y/n). i don’t care, do whatever you gotta do to me so that i can have you back. i need my family back.”

things changed quick. toji grabbed your thigh possessively, earning a whimper from you. a sound he hadn’t heard in months, and one that had his dick twitch in his boxers. his lips left wet kisses along your neck as his hands explored your body. he unbuckled your seatbelt and gripped at your waist, “c’mere, mama. needa feel you again.”

there was a war going on in your body. a war between your mind, heart, and pussy. your mind was against this ordeal, hated how his hands felt on you. but your heart loved it. it melted at his touch and kisses. and your pussy? ol’ girl was dripping for toji, wanting to feel him back inside you again. it has been so long since you last took care of your sexual needs. you weren’t looking for casual flings, and it was difficult to have when you were devoting all your time to being a single mother. alas, it was two to one, and you let the majority win as you kicked off your heels and moved to sit in his lap. your mind would get you back tomorrow, but for now you didn’t care.

“my beautiful wife. missed ya s’much baby.” the fat of your ass was squished in his big palms, his grip earning a hiss from you. he stopped his feverish kisses to nuzzle into the crook of your neck and smell the familiar cinnamon vanilla scent of your body wash and matching lotion. a scent he longed to have back on his clothes.

his hands fiddled with the hem of your dress, fingers dipping in to graze your inner thighs. “toji please.” you pleaded.

“what do you want, ma? you can have anything you want, so tell me.” his finger poked at your clit through your panties and a shiver rolled up your spine.

“you, toji. just gimme you.” you cupped his face, tilting his head up to connect your lips in a kiss. you hadn’t kissed him months, his taste having left your brain.

but nothing about you left toji’s. not the way you would kiss him like it hurt, like you wanted to transfer all your feelings onto him. or the way you bit his bottom lip as you pulled back from him, or the way you would whimper and paw at his aching cock through his pants. he could never forget how desperate you became when turned on; how your hand reached down to the control that would push his seat all the way back and give you better room to straddle him. you had fucked in this car many times, many nights and even days. so all this was like muscle memory for you two.

toji’s hand went under your dress to your panties, to feel the silk material against his fingertips and snarl. “ya wore this f’him, hm? my favorite dress and your good panties…for that pink-haired lil’ fuck?”

he pushed your panties to the side, fingers immediately dipping into your warm pussy to fondle it. it had been so long since he last touched you like this—since he touched anyone. after the separation he took interest in no one other than you, something he kicked himself for not doing that dreadful night.

“i-is this,” you swallowed the lump in your throat as he worked your clit between his index and middle finger. “is this what you did…with her?” you choke out, just as his two fingers pushed into your pussy.

“ah—.” you hissed, grabbing at his shoulder. you couldn’t help to ask, and you knew it’d make him angry…but how could you not? yeah, the woman means nothing to toji, meant nothing to toji in comparison to you.

but what toji failed to realize up until this point was she meant everything to you. she was the one he seeked pleasure in, a comfort he no longer found with you. she was the one that—even if just for a moment, made him forget all about you and his family. so yeah, while toji couldn’t even remember her name, you were haunted, with her in your memory for what felt like eternity.

he stopped his movements and leaned back away from you. his answer to this question would make or break this reunion you two had going on. he could see how your eyes held desperation. practically pleading for him to tell you to your face.

“i told you, she only sucked my dick, baby. i wore a condom too and just fucked her face to get out my frustrations wit’chu s’all. wouldn’t think about fucking someone else. not when i have you. only one i want to be with like that, ‘kay? only one for me.“

and you nodded. you felt slight relief he didn’t have full blown sex. in some twisted way it seemed to ease the pain a bit. but toji knew that it was wrong to downplay what he did that night, but he knew admitting to his infidelity would destroy you. and he refused to do that after he just got you back. so as far as you needed to know, all he did was get head.

you let out a nervous sigh before your hands fiddled with his belt buckle. “don’t wanna wait. just need you to fuck me.” you mumbled as your hand slid into his boxers and gripped his cock. you had forgotten how thick he was, your hand just barely wrapping around him. toji hissed at your touch.

“i need to prep you, baby, you know this. you’ll get hurt.” he tried to stop you as you pulled out his dick but you slapped his hand away. he had lifted his hips and pulled his pants and boxers down a bit so he could be properly free.

you said nothing as a response. no, words weren’t enough to show him how much you didn’t care. you instead looked at the way his dick was against his covered abs. how the thick vein that ran along his shaft was on full display. you took it in in your hands and lowered your head.

toji’s mouth fell open at the globs of saliva you spat directly on the head of his cock. his toes curled at the way you twisted your hand around him, spreading your spit and properly lubing him up. “m’already hurt.” you mumbled more-so to yourself as you fidgeted around and positioned him at your entrance. he knew what you meant, and fuck, did it kill him to hear.

toji stared at you with low eyes, licking the scar on his lip when he felt you glide the mushroom head between your folds. he could hear the noise it made as it slid to your clit, and he bucked up to nudge it, earning a quiet whimper from you.

“c’mon pretty,” he sat up to bury his face in your neck. the smell was intoxicating, and he was slowly kissing and sucking your neck as a means to almost taste it. to taste you. “let me be in my sweet girl again, my beautiful wife.”

there would be moments between you and toji, where the roles seemed to flip for a minute. he normally called the shots in the bedroom but you would get control from time to time. it wouldn’t be for long, but he loved when the moment came. you were so demanding it made him almost consider becoming a switch. almost.

you kept your eyes on him and hand around his neck as you slid down slowly. there was a slight burn felt as you adjusted to his size. your pussy had forgotten just how big he was. it wasn’t a discomfort though. you were grinning through the pain, your tongue gliding across your teeth.

“shit, mama. forgot how much this little cunt loves to squeeze me.” he spoke through gritted teeth. he bit his lip to hold back the moan he wanted to let out as you squeezed the side of his neck.

when he bottomed out, toji’s fist hit his side of the car, “fuck.” he hissed. he bunches up the bottom of your dress, pushing it up to be around your stomach so he could watch your pussy take him in. he let you have your control for about five minutes, but when he sensed you slowing down he reached out to wrap a large hand around your neck.

he pulled you to his lips, the most sloppiest of kisses being shared between the two of you. he began to thrust up into you, his pace fast and creating sounds that filled the car.

“toji—.” you cried, tears pricking the end corners of your eyes as you sucked on your bottom lip. toji had a devilish smirk on his face. “oh my goddd, you feel so good, baby.” you were a breathless mess. his hands had a firm grip on your hips and moved you to match his thrusts.

“take your tits out, mama. need ‘em now.” he panted against your ear, biting your earlobe after. you did as told, pulling down the straps of your dress and pulling it off your breasts, holding one of your titties to his mouth.

“look at em. so fucking fat.” he breathed out with a smile. he knew breastfeeding would make your breasts bigger—hell they were big prior to him knocking you up, but it had been so long since he last saw you like this. the pillowy mounds before him were getting his mouth to water. his tongue dampened his lips before he wrapped them around your nipple with a grunt of satisfaction.

“o-oh my god, tojiii!” you threw your head back, cradling his head in your hold as his tongue flicked your hardened bud. he was like a man starved, forced to go without what he longed for the most. he couldn’t get enough of you. not your taste, definitely not the way you had an almost vice grip on his dick and his heart.

“oh fuck, (y/n). just like that baby.” his voice was muffled against your chest, but from the way he started to get off-beat with his thrusts, you could feel he was close.

“can i come in you, hm? let me remind her how much she missed having me dripping outta her, down your legs? pleaseee, mama. let me fill you back up.” he was begging like a bitch, something you rarely witnessed, but something that never failed to bring you to an earth shattering orgasm.

“ oh shit!—toji m’cummin.” your tits bounced in his face as he randomly placed kissed along your chest and shoulders. he had wrapped his arms around you and leaned back in the seat, taking over fully and delivering the hardest thrusts to your sopping cunt.

you screamed, nails digging into his jaw and mouth opened against his own. you couldn’t kiss him, you couldn’t remember how to. not when he was fucking his permanent place into your pussy.

“feel ya clamping down, love. holding me so good i can’t hold it any longer.” he wasn’t thinking of making you cum first like he usually would, not when he was on the verge of probably the best climax of his life. emotions were high, tension was too. the scene couldn’t be anymore intimate, any more explicit and obscene.

the car windows were fogged up, with only your handprints against it. toji was groaning, mindlessly spitting out profanities as he watched your juices slightly squirt out every time he buried himself in you. “fuck, m’cummin, gonna be so much.” he said with a whine.

“toji!” you cried, “don’t cum in me, please baby.” you were breathless, but the order was heard. toji honestly didn’t know how to feel. you were begging, and the tone was what he wanted, but what you were saying wasn’t.

he was going to say something to you, he was, but then he felt that clench you did around him, and the way your fingernails digged into the nape of his neck. you were whimpering, lips to his as you rode through your orgasm. he quickly pulled out of you, the rough and fast action getting you to flinch, but you had no time to think about it before he was fisting himself to cum on your puffy clit, a carnal groan coming from him as he watched his cum cover you.

nothing but your choked sobs covered with his moans and heavy pants were heard in the car. he grabbed a fistful of your hair and brought you into a surprisingly rough kiss.

“oh fuck.” you had fallen on him once your orgasm passed, lying on him and mindlessly placing small kisses to his neck. he was mumbling incoherently, eyes shut and mind focused on the way you pulsed over his thigh.

“she—she has your prominent features.” he said out of nowhere, the comment getting you to stare at him quizzically.

“hm?”

“rinny. she looks like you because she has your nose and lips, y’r prominent features. her eyes are ‘gumi’s. filled with wonder, curiosity.” he was still trying to catch his breath throughout his words. “been wanting to say that to you for a while now, how much she looks like you two.”

he sighed, “i get…scared that she’ll forget me. forget she has a dad.” his finger was tracing shapes along your thighs, his mouth speaking his bottled up fears to you. you had forgotten just how vulnerable he got after sex. almost as if he was too tired to keep his guard up.

“she knows her daddy, toji. she loves you.” you reassured him, giving his shoulder a reassuring rub.

“do you still love me?” he was so scared for your answer. because what was stopping you from just using him as some fuck toy then dipping out his life for good? after all you did tell him to pull out. he had so much work to do to show you his change, to show you just how bad he wants to change.

“to the point that it hurts.” you said as your finger traced over the scratch marks you left on his shoulder and neck. you were being truthful. loving toji had to be one of the most rewarding pains you’ve ever experienced, right after motherhood. you would give and he would take, but never return. it was like a test; how much more can you endure from this…would you call it a voluntary sacrifice? yeah because that’s what love is, a sacrifice.

you sacrificed your future for toji and megumi, and now for rin. you gave your time, your heart, your body, and your strength. all of you was in the man you lied on. while you listened to the steady beats of his heart, you knew yours matched his pattern—it was your heart he had after all. this was a test on your resilience for loving toji. how much more could you endure because of how you felt about him?

it seemed he would never be the toji you dreamed of. the one that would be vulnerable outside of the bedroom, the one who would open up to you when things get tough instead of running off. the toji you had thought he was, the one who would never hurt you the way he did.

“do you love me?” you looked up at him, watching the way his eyes dropped to meet yours.

“more than life itself.” he kissed your nose, the sentiment making you softly smile. you two stayed connected for a little bit more, the sound of passing cars along the road and the nights wind being the only sound you two needed.

you focused on him, and how he felt under you. how your bodies seemed to mold together, your hearts beat the same. you couldn’t help your mind drifting to earlier though, and thinking about your date, and if you would’ve let it get this far with sukuna if toji didn’t show up.

the person you went on the date with was bad, yeah, but you enjoyed going out. you enjoyed getting to know someone new and start over. it was refreshing. hell, if sukuna played his cards right you might’ve just kissed him tonight. but you’ll never know now that you’ve gone and left with toji.

as if he could read your mind, toji tensed up a bit from under you, “i will be the husband and father you and our kids need me to be, (y/n). i promise.” he spoke into your hair, his hold on you tightening in the slightest. almost like his stamp of confirmation that you had his word.

but you didn’t respond. you had no response.

he knew this one night of passion wasn’t going to make up for what he did. you weren’t just going to forget his wrongdoings like it was nothing. he needed to prove to you he has learned from his mistake. he needs to show you, show megumi and keep his promise to geto; that he is a different man. he was going to work his ass off to get his family back.

and he would spend every second, and exhaust every resource he had until he was back under the same roof as you, as his children, and back to being a prominent figure in your life. he was going to work his ass off to write himself back in your heart, and continue the love story you two started.

if only he knew what you were thinking.

toji still ain’t shit sorry if you were expecting character development 😭

but thank you all again for vibing w this story, i appreciate it.

tags • @mollyville @miyaluv127 @lemmetreatya @tojisfav @aizawa19 @cloudsinthecosmos

[doberbutts]

I also think- having recently seen a post that said Blue Eye Samurai isn't a queer story, it just has queer elements- that sometimes it feels like fans cannot make up their minds.

Do we or do we not want stories that treat being gay as a perfectly normal, perfectly common experience the same way straight people are depicted in every story to ever exist?

In BES, no one is outright stated to be queer. That's partially because in Japan, until Japan felt the need to sanitize itself to appeal to foreigners, it wasn't unheard of at all for men to be gay. Multiple famous samurai and swordsmen and nobles were either outspokenly gay or are commonly theorized to have been gay in modern historical readings. Abijah making multiple references to swinging both ways, Kaji's offer of a male prostitute, the various scenes we have of men being together in sexual positions, they're not met with surprise because homosexuality was an acknowledged thing that happened.

Taigen's erection while he's wrestling Mizu, even though he doesn't yet know her secret, is treated awkwardly because they're supposed to dislike each other and also he's supposed to be in love with Akemi, not because "whoa bro no homo".

(This is also why I keep saying that it's difficult for me to put into English words what I think Mizu's gender is, because gender and sexuality quite frankly did not work the way my 2020s American brain wants to contextualize it, and I think it's important to consider the cultural aspects here esp in a show so heavily leaning on a racial story)

However, compared to many other shows out there even regarding the same area and country, BES is significantly more queer than the majority of them produced in the last 30 years. Is Mizu herself queer? Well... maybe, depending how you define it. Back in the day, otherwise cisgender crossdressers and male-impersonators were still grouped in with those we'd call transgender nowadays. She seems to be exclusively interested in men, but also seems to be equally receptive to considering herself sexually as both a man and a woman pairing with men, than as a man or woman pairing with women which she has adamantly refused with zero interest on multiple occasions.

Is Taigen bi? I mean, maybe! He seemed more mortified that he had an unwanted erection in front of someone he wanted to impress and play with, than that he had it over someone he considers a man, using the excuse that he misses his would-be fiance.

Abijah certainly seems to be bisexual, considering we see him having sex with both women and men, and his various sexual references talk about both men and women as well. This is ignoring whatever weird sexual tension thing he's got going with Heiji, who seems both receptive and repulsed by it.

And, not to be remiss, but there is a reason I specified that homosexuality among men was pretty known. Due to the more rigid policing of women's sexuality in this era, homosexuality among women was less commonly reported (though I have heard stories of noble women and their handmaids, or the working poor women, or among prostitutes living together in the brothels, so also not unheard of but perhaps less accepted as women were largely bought and sold in marriage and sex trafficking) - but even with all of that, Kaji and Kinuyo have something together. Whether that is a mother-daughter thing, or if they were lovers, is up to interpretation. The implication that out of everyone at the brothel that Kaji genuinely cares for, Kinuyo was special, and that wasn't a particularly uncommon arrangement historically if I'm hearing about it 400 years later in a completely different country.

So this "well it's not a queer show" and "if I was told this was a queer story I'd be disappointed" is honestly just ridiculous hooey to me. Do you want characters who are able to explore their sexualities without looking over their shoulder out of fear of homophobia, or not?

[onceuponaoneshotfanfic]

Love's a Game, Wanna Play?

I'll Write Your Name Chapter 1

Roy Kent x Latina!Popstar!Reader

2.9k words

Warnings: Language, mentions of drinking/partying, Roy being kind of pathetic for Keeley

A/N: Ahh I'm so excited for this series! I was inspired while watching the Eras movie and it just kind of spiraled from there. I am so, so excited to share this with you ❤️

As always, @agentstarkid is an absolute angel for letting me yammer about this thing nonstop!

The tabloid headlines screamed up at me from my publicist’s office coffee table, all about how Everett, my idiot boyfriend- ex-boyfriend now- had punched out some guy in a club. And in every photo, there I was behind Ev, holding two drinks and laughing. Granted, one of those drinks was his. And the laughter was because in my drunken state, I genuinely thought Everett and the other guy were just goofing around. But none of that mattered when people had magazines to sell.

“Babe,” Lanie, my publicist, was saying from her spot next to me on the couch. “We need a serious image makeover.”

“I already broke up with Everett for continuing to be the world’s biggest jackass,” I reminded her as I grabbed some M&M’s from the coffee table. “Not sure what else there is to do.”

April, my personal assistant, picked up one of the magazines and began to flip through it. “It’s not just Everett,” she started slowly, opening up to the article all about mine and Ev’s ‘wild night’ at the club. “It’s you. You party, you go out with guy after guy, this Twitter thing with, well, you know…” She shrugged. “You’re getting something of a reputation, love.”

I sighed and popped another candy into my mouth. “I bet Ev’s people aren’t having this conversation with him right now,” I grumbled childishly.

“Because everyone already knows he’s garbage,” Lanie snorted. “This is exactly the kind of behavior they expect from him. But you-” She grasped my hand, her face full of affection. “-you are amazing. You’re a great writer and performer, and you’re a role model. So what the hell you were doing with that rat, no one could ever understand.”

“Hmmph.” I slouched further onto the couch, pretending that she wasn’t completely correct about Everett being scummy. He was cute, in that skinny, pale, undernourished, unshowered way rock stars tended to be. He was famous and had a commanding stage presence with a swagger he really hadn’t earned. And he was always ready to have a good time. But he wasn’t exactly sweet. Or sensitive, unless someone was criticizing his art. Or really all that intelligent, although he liked to talk like he was.

April cleared her throat. “Lanie and I think we might… need some outside help.”

I narrowed my eyes, always suspicious when these two were in cahoots without me. “What kind of outside help?”

“Keeley Jones,” Lanie said simply, pulling out her phone. “Has her own firm. I’ve worked with her before. The woman’s a bit… quirky. But she’s brilliant, babes.” She showed me a picture of a woman I was sure I’d seen before. “We’ll meet with her the day after tomorrow to talk strategy.”

“She’s a fan,” April added in that helpful voice of hers. “She loves your music.”

I studied the picture carefully. “Keeley Jones,” I murmured. “She’s a model, right? Or was, I assume?” Before either woman could respond, it clicked. “Oh shit,” I hissed. “She’s one of those poor women who got her photos and videos leaked last year, isn’t she?”

“She was,” Lanie confirmed. “So, she completely understands how ruthless and, frankly, unfair the press can be to a woman. It’s one of the reasons I think she’ll be a good fit. She’s pretty passionate about defending women from unfair treatment.”

“Well,” I sighed, leaning back, “guess we can hear her out, see what she has in mind.”

Lanie cleared her throat, glancing at April, who looked just as anxious. “Actually,” my publicist said slowly, “we already know what she has in mind.”

~

Keeley sat in Roy’s chair, feet casually up on his desk, scrolling absently on her phone while she waited for the gaffer to come in from the pitch.

“Oh. Uh, hi Keeley.” Roy Kent stood stiffly in the doorway, the way he often stood when he saw his ex-girlfriend. Fuck, she looked pretty today, in a stupidly fluffy pink sweater and ridiculously high heeled boots. Keeley always looked pretty.

Either Keeley didn’t notice the way his eyes softened at the sight of her, or she chose to ignore it. “Hey there, Roy-o!” she greeted, swinging her feet off his desk and sitting up straight. “D’you have a minute?”

For Keeley? Roy had all the minutes in the fucking world. To an extent, she knew that; he did come stumbling to her house with Jamie Tartt, begging her to choose between them, after all. And she cherished Roy, she really did. He treated her better than anyone else ever had. But she also knew that the way he loved her wasn’t the way she loved him or was even the way she wanted to be loved.

But that didn’t mean she couldn’t use his softness for her to her advantage every now and then.

“I’ve got a proposition for you,” she started slowly as Roy leaned on his desk, not growling at her to get out of his chair like he would to anyone else. “See, I’ve got this client, and she needs some help in the PR department.”

Roy smirked. “She wanted the best, so she came to Keeley fucking Jones for help?”

Keeley shrugged off his praise. “Well, kind of. Her people came to me for a consultation. I know her publicist, she’s fabulous, they’re just a bit at a loss right now.”

“Can I ask who it is?” Roy vaguely recognized the name Keeley responded with. “That fucking pop star, right? With all the boyfriends?”

“Pop phenomenon, you mean,” Keeley snorted. “She’s only one of the biggest names in the world.”

Like Roy gave a fuck about some pop princess. “If she’s so big, why does she need PR help?

Keeley sighed. “She’s got some bad press right now. Her gross boyfriend- ex-boyfriend now, thankfully- got into a fight at a club, sent the guy to hospital. And somehow, this is her fault. Not to mention that this actress that she used to hang out with is all over Twitter badmouthing her, saying she’s trying to steal her boyfriend. She’s just… got a lot going on at the moment.”

“Fucking trainwreck,” Roy mumbled, starting to wonder where the fuck he came into play.

“She’s really not,” Keeley insisted. “Her publicist- Lanie- says she’s actually really great. Very kind and intelligent. She just goes out a lot and apparently has shit choice in company.” She lit up. “That’s where I need you, Roy.”

I need you, Roy. Those four words had Roy sitting up taller, smirking a little as he gazed at that pretty face. “And what, exactly, do you need me for?”

Keeley bit her lip. “D’you know what a ‘publicity stunt’ is?”

~

I drained the last of my giant coffee cup as I approached the elevator, sighing when I realized it had not made my tequila-caused headache disappear. While I’d promised Lanie I wouldn’t be going out for a bit, she’d never said anything about me having people over. Just a dozen of my closest friends, laughing in my living room and losing track of shots. Definitely what I needed to take my mind off the headlines, but probably not the best idea before an early-morning breakfast meeting at KBPR.

“You need to press the button.”

“Excuse me?” I turned in the direction of the voice- the growl, really- that pulled me out of my thoughts.

The bearded man let out an exaggerated sigh, rolling his brown eyes. “You need to press the fucking button,” he repeated slowly, as if to a toddler, “if you want to call the lift.”

Behind my oversized sunglasses, I narrowed my eyes at him, ignoring my initial observation that he was pretty damn cute. “Are you really implying that I don’t know how to use an elevator?” I scoffed.

He reached around me, completely invading my personal space, and hit the button in question. “Well, you’re standing here just fucking staring,” he grumbled. “So, either you’re a fucking zombie, or you don’t know how to use a lift. Either way, you’re making me fucking late.”

With a scowl, I turned to face the doors, desperate for them to open- although less desperate to get into the enclosed space with this man. As soon as the elevator dinged, I stepped inside the still opening doors, smashing the floor number Lanie had texted me and settling myself into a corner with crossed arms. The man stepped on after me and reached for the buttons, but stopped, thumb hovering over the number I had just hit. With a small hmmph, he slouched in the opposite corner, mirroring my closed-off body language.

It was a silent ride, filled with scowls and impatient huffs from both of us. I tried to remember the last time someone was so snide to me; it definitely didn’t happen often, at least not away from the safe anonymity of the internet.

When the elevator got to our floor, the man glared at me, a grunt urging me to step out first. I gave a hum of acknowledgement, matching his curt tone and refusing to give him the satisfaction of eye contact.

What a dick.

Unfortunately, that dick was about two steps behind me as I walked down the hall to the KBPR office. I tried to ignore the heavy sounds of his footsteps and focus on the insane idea this supposedly brilliant PR expert had come up with.

That PR expert smiled at me when I approached, sticking her hand out. “I’m Keeley Jones,” she chirped, her professional tone and handshake contrasting with her bright pink dress and sparkly shoes. “It is so nice to meet you!” Her eyes shifted behind me. “And I assume you already met Roy in the lift!”

Oh no. Oh hell no. There was no way this was the guy, this scowling, rude, son of a-

“Can we start this meeting?” the man- Roy- grumbled as he approached. “I’ve only got like an hour. I left Beard in charge of training, so the team’s probably in the fucking sewer again.”

“Come on in,” Keeley Jones hummed, gesturing for us to follow her. We walked through the bright office, following her into what I assumed was her personal office, one as brightly lit and colorful as her.

Lanie was already on the plush couch, scrolling on her phone. She raised her eyebrows when she saw me. “What’s up with the sunglasses? Not hungover, are we?” Her bored tone was annoyingly familiar.

I rolled my eyes and plopped down on the couch next to her, removing the shades. “Didn’t want to be recognized on my way into a public relations office,” I muttered, tucking them into my purse. “Figured that would defeat the purpose of this whole operation.”

Keeley Jones smiled at me, an admittedly lovely, friendly smile, as she took a seat behind her desk; Roy hovered nearby. “She’s a smart one, Lanie, just like you said.” She looked up at Roy. “You two got acquainted on the lift, then?” When he simply grunted in reply, she turned back to me. “Now, I understand if you think this idea is crazy,” she started slowly. “And it kind of is. But believe me when I say, it’s been done, and I’ve seen it work.” She cleared her throat. “Celebrities fake-date all the time. To promote projects, to deflect bad press, to hide secrets. So you wouldn’t be the first ones to do this, trust me.” She gestured towards Roy. “And I think Roy here is perfect for you. He’s older and more mature than your previous boyfriends, so none of that party-boy stuff. He’s dated plenty of celebrities- including myself- so he knows what comes with the territory. Absolute football legend, so I think you’re suitably matched in terms of fame. And he’s pretty damn private these days.” Her smile softened. “And if I’m being candid, he’s probably the best guy I know. He’s so protective and trustworthy. He’ll have your back.”

“What’s in it for him?” I couldn’t help the way I narrowed my eyes at the brooding man; he returned the glare in kind.

“He could use the press too,” Keeley chuckled, gazing up at him. “I love you, Roy, but you’re not the most poised with the media.” She turned back to me as he rolled his eyes, something close to affection on his face this time. “He could use some of your charm and charisma to bolster his own reputation with the papers.” She nodded firmly. “It’s a match made in heaven. Or KBPR.”

Lanie nudged me. “What d’you think babes?”

I thought it was insane. Fake dating to get the press off my back? There were so many ways this thing could backfire. Not to mention the fact that my potential fake boyfriend was already on my nerves, with his probably permanent scowl and annoyed eyes.

But, as my mind wandered to the headlines I’d passed at the newsstands on my way to this meeting, I knew that I had to at least try.

“Yeah,” I murmured with a shrug. “Let’s do it.”

~

Roy only vaguely heard her agree to the plan. He was too busy trying not to smile at Keeley’s praise; that he was mature, a legend, protective, and trustworthy. As ridiculous as he thought this whole publicity stunt business was, he was willing to give it a shot- for Keeley.

“Well, since we’re all onboard,” Keeley hummed, pulling out her tablet. “All that’s left to do is sign NDAs and plan your little romance.” She glanced at the calendar on her desk. “I’ve got a meet-cute in mind, actually. You’re friends with Dani Rojas, right?”

Roy blinked as the pop princess nodded, showing enthusiasm for the first time since he found her in front of the lift. “Dani? Oh, I love Dani! He’s such a sweetheart.”

“Oi.” Roy frowned at Keeley. “If they already know each other, why didn’t you ask Rojas to do this shit? The press like him a hell of a lot more than they like me.”

A snort came from the couch. “Don’t think his girlfriends would like him adding another woman to their relationship, even if it’s just pretend.”

Keeley nodded. “Exactly. And again, you’ve got this steady older guy thing going on, Roy. You manage a professional football team, you coach your niece, you sit at home and read. You’re very domestic, and I think she needs to be seen that way.” She grinned. “Dani doesn’t exactly have that same reputation. But he does provide you two with a connection.” She turned her attention back to her visitors. “Here’s what I’m thinking: you get Dani to invite you to a Richmond game and go out with the team afterwards. Win or lose, those guys pretty much always do something after a match. And that’s where you two can meet and connect.” She leaned back comfortably, looking every bit like the boss she was. “Then we’ll get you two seen together, get you to a few more matches, get Roy to a show, make some cryptic social media posts. Soft launch. Then we’ll do your debut as a couple, have you attend events on each other’s arms, gush about each other online and in interviews. Maybe you write Roy a song, maybe you go on holiday together, that kind of thing.” She flipped through the planner on her desk. “All in all, I’m thinking four to six months, then you can end things amicably and stay friends.”

“Six months?” Roy carped. “Keeley, you didn’t mention-”

“That’s a respectable period of time,” the ex-model interrupted. “Long enough for you two to get attention, be believable as a serious couple, and to get everyone to forget about these headlines.” She shook her head at Roy. “What, you thought you’d go on one date and that would be it? Come on, Roy. It took at least three weeks for us to start making headlines together. You know this takes time.”

Roy’s voice went low. “Keeley-”

Keeley stood and grabbed Roy’s arm; he wondered if she could feel that same little surge of energy at the contact. “Will you ladies give us one moment?” She dragged Roy out of the office, out of earshot. “Come on, Roy,” she huffed, letting go of him. “You said you could do this.”

“That was before I met her,” Roy grumbled, folding his arms and missing her touch. “This isn’t gonna work. No one’s going to believe us. We’ve barely met, and already she’s a right fucking nightmare-”

“You’re not exactly my daydream either, Kent.”

Roy whipped around. She stood in the doorway, eyebrows furrowed and arms crossed. She walked over and gazed up at him with nothing but determination on her face.

“Listen,” she started. “I get it. This is stupid. The press is stupid. I think Keeley and Lanie are insane for this scheme, and I don’t really believe it’s going to work, if I’m being honest.” She looked at Keeley. “No offense, Miss Jones.” She turned her eyes back to Roy. “But this whole fame thing is an absolute fucking game. And apparently we both need help playing it.” She stuck her hand out. “I’m in if you are.”

A slow sigh escaped Roy’s lips. He really could use the positive exposure. Despite his growing comfort in front of the cameras, he still had years- decades- of shit press to make up for. And the Greyhounds could always use whatever positive publicity they could get. It’d be good for the club, and Roy would do just about anything for the club.

And he’d do absolutely anything for Keeley.

All it took was one glance over at that face, the face he missed waking up to, and he was done for. “Fine,” he huffed, shaking the popstar’s hand. “I’m fucking in.”

Taglist: @infinetlyforgotten @ladygrey03 @book-of-roses @thatonedogwithablog @misshall14 @wibblywobblyvampywolfystuff @akornsworld @itswhateveripromise @purecinnamonextract @oceanncurrent @dearvoidgoodnight @hopefulromances

[jnnul]

lowkey

gif credit: @chwerity

genre: FLUFF, action if you count the amount of running they do 😭, jaemin being stupid <3

word count: 0.8k

type: drabble

a/n: hehe welcome to my first official post! i guess the other two were just timestamps to kinda get a feel for tumblr lol. let me know what you guys think! the comments/reblog tags are so cute and i keep rereading them <3

+++

you had never expected that you would spend your friday night running away from daily mail.

quite frankly, you didn’t expect that you would be running at all on a friday night, much less from tabloids. you prided yourself on how lowkey you lived your life. you made few, but diehard, friends. you had no enemies. you had a well-paying, stable job and you were working towards buying your own apartment soon. but for all of your attempts to stay absolutely average, your superstar boyfriend had to go become famous and propel you to stardom with him.

“oh my god, jaemin, if i have to work out every time we go on a date, i’m literally never seeing you in person again,” you gasp as your boyfriend tugs on your arm to make you run faster - as if that would mean that you would lose your paparazzi trail.

you still don’t know how you ended up like this in the first place. pulling na jaemin, the center of nct dream, was a small miracle in itself. but regardless, you were well seasoned veterans of the dating scheme now. after dating for three years, the two of you were really good at hiding from the public about your relationship.

it definitely helped that you were a run of the mill citizen (as opposed to, say, a world renowned singer) and the fact that jaemin was a homebody until he died so being in this situation was a little foreign to you. you weren’t sure if you had gotten into a scare like this since the first two months that you and jaemin were dating.

“i thought we would be safe in fucking london!” jaemin hisses back as the two of you weave in and out of the stumbling bodies exiting suspicious looking clubs. “it’s two in the morning and people still recognized me wearing a sweatshirt, mask, and sunglasses.”

you stop in your tracks at that, gaping at jaemin’s ‘foolproof’ disguise. the sweatshirt he mentioned? neon green. you mentally face-palm as the two of you start running again, hearing the incoming mob of people.

they definitely had done this before, you think. you were way too tired and they looked like keep tailing the two of you for another couple hours for sure.

“you cannot tell me that the sweatshirt the color of a traffic suit was your way of escaping paparazzi,” you deadpan. looking back on it, the last couple years worth of dates were done where you were both wearing clothes that were almost at the level of national espionage.

you and jaemin would always wear varying shades of black and the two of you would always choose the most hole in the wall places you could find - or some of the industry safe places, such as the locations in itaewon, where you could easily blend with the foreigners. even some of the veterans of the industry were known for letting idols into their establishments in discrete ways so that everyone could act normally for a few hours.

the two of you had gotten careless this time. thinking you would be safe due to the far away location, as well as the late timing, you had grown lax and comfortable due to the lack of scandals for the past few years. rookie mistake.

“this way! if we get off of peter street, we should be able to dodge the tabloids,” you stage whisper, tugging your boyfriend so that he would be by your side as the two of you dash into the nearest adjacent street that you can.

you’re affectively pressed up against jaemin’s chest as you rest your head against the crook of his neck, trying to conceal both of your faces so that you look like any other drunk and enamored couple. you would tell jaemin to take off that stupid neon green sweatshirt but the space to move is a luxury you haven’t been awarded. 

you and jaemin hold your breaths, hoping that the less noise you make, the less the gods are compelled to send the tabloids your way. it seems your vehement prayers (and perhaps the fact that the alleyway was so dark, it muted jaemin’s sweatshirt color) have paid off because the mob that was following you run right past the alleyway you’re hiding in in a cacophony of “this way!” and “we’re gonna make front page!” that lets you know that you’ve successfully escape them. 

the two of you shimmy out of the alley when you’re positive there’s no one left and breathe in the air that was much too hard to breath in the cramped alleyway.

you look at jaemin, who’s already looking at you with a stupid grin on his face as he presses a kiss against your cheek.

“so much for lowkey, huh?”

“na jaemin, i swear to fucking god, if you don’t throw out that sweatshirt right now, i’m breaking up with you!”

“but...but it’s the nct dream sweatshirt.”

“...i’m gonna kill jeno.”

[royalvelvette]

and love will bring us freedom

Making my own Uncle Ozzie content with this next short story.

(Part 1 of 3) (Ao3 Link)

Rating: M

Characters: Alastor, Charlie Morningstar, Vaggie, Angel Dust, Husk, Cherri Bomb, Niffty Non-Physical Appearance: Fizzarolli, Mammon, Ozzie Mentioned: Lucifer Morningstar

Warnings: Assumed incest (it isn't), canon-typical language, implied child/teen abuse, discussion of past major character injury.

Word Count: 2024

Alastor raised an eyebrow as he peered over the banister. Much like when Lucifer had first visited, the hotel was in quite the tizzy. Perhaps a little less so than that wretched day – today’s frenetic energy seemed to only be affecting Charlie and her darling. He watched silently for a moment, as was his wont; not for long though.

Charlie was carrying one of those horrific picture boxes, and that just wouldn’t do.

Alastor stepped back into his shadow, re-materializing next to Vaggie. Vaggie didn’t notice him at first (she rarely did; it was quite rude), so he cleared his throat. She jumped, and Alastor yanked his arm back before she could grab onto it – her stress-gripping was only amusing if it wasn’t him she was doing it to; he had no desire to have a short-tempered angel clinging to him for upwards of ten minutes, no thank you.

“I wasn’t aware there was... another one of those noisy picture boxes in the hotel,” he said after enduring Vaggie’s (frankly adorable) glare for long enough.

“We put in storage after someone,” here, she shot him another sour look, “destroyed the one in the living area.”

“My dear, I couldn’t leave such a threat unattended,” Alastor said. “After all, Vox is quite capable of using any of those devices to infiltrate an area. Why, I ought to do my duty as guardian of this hotel-”

Charlie set the picture box down with a very solid thunk, cutting him off mid-sentence. She wiped her hands off on her pant legs (disgusting, he needed to teach her the importance of image lest she tarnish his own by behaving so boorishly in public). She straightened up, hands on her hips as she surveyed the room.

“It’s okay, Al,” Charlie said, coming over and slinging an arm over Vaggie’s shoulders. “That tv was made down in Envy; Vox won’t be able to use it. You did a great job setting things up, babe,” she added, kissing Vaggie’s forehead.

Disgusting. Alastor turned away from the public display, instead walking over to the picture box. He examined it carefully, looking for any of the telltale marks of a machine created for sinners. Nothing stood out to him – the logo was of a company he had never heard tell of; not even as one crushed under VoxTek’s heel. The screen was (unfortunately) of much better make than the usual garbage that the Pride ring had access to. He rapped it once, sharply, with his staff.

Nothing. No power resonated back at him, not like the first television. It was, as Charlie said, completely unusable to him – and, therefore, Vox. He sighed – there would be no ridding himself of this picture box the same way he had the last. Unfortunate, truly. Perhaps he could entice Niffty into ruining the screen at some point in her pest control pursuits.

Charlie and Vaggie approached his back, so he turned to face them. “It is as you say, my dear,” he told Charlie. “May I ask why you are only bringing it out now, however? I know Angel Dust has been bemoaning the lack of... entertainment ever since I rid us of the first one.”

Charlie beamed at him. “My cousin is going to be on today,” she said excitedly, grabbing onto his hand. “He’s won every year, of course, ‘cause Fizz is the best at being a clown, but I still like watching him perform!”

“I... see,” Alastor said, extracting his hand after waiting a moment to see if she would let go on her own.

Vaggie made a sound a little bit like snnrk. “Her cousin is famous,” she said, entirely unhelpful.

“Who’s her cousin?” Angel Dust called from the bar, where he and Husker had been watching the girls run around. “Maybe I’ve heard of him.”

Charlie darted over to the bar, practically bouncing on her toes. “His name’s Fizzarolli! He’s the best jester in Hell!”

Angel Dust shrugged. “Neva heard of him.”

Vaggie sighed, following after Charlie and tugging her back just a bit. Alastor followed – he was loath to miss out on learning more about anyone. Husker was already pouring him a drink when he took a seat, the good man.

“He’s popular with hellborn,” Vaggie said. “Pretty much everyone owns a robo-fizz at some point.”

Charlie muttered something under her breath, scowling. Alastor barely resisted turning his ears towards her.

“What was that, dear?” he asked instead.

Charlie looked up, eyes wide and – perhaps guilty? Hm. Curiouser and curiouser, Alastor made a mental note to reteach her the importance of a smile.

“Oh, I just...” she mumbled. “I don’t like the robo-fizzes, is all. They don’t compare, y’know?”

He kindly let the lie pass. If Charlie didn’t wish to repeat herself, it was most likely mean-spirited. Good to see that the girl hadn’t lost her spine during the assault on the hotel, though he would have to work with her on lying successfully. Charlie wearing her heart on her sleeve had been cute, at first, but with the Vees showing interest... no, best not to let it continue.

“Wait,” Husker said. “Ain’t Fizza-whatever the name of your uncle’s boyfriend?”

“Oh, they’re the same person,” Charlie said.

Angel Dust spat out his drink – Alastor quickly covered his own, though he understood the sentiment. Perhaps it was different for hellborn demons? It wouldn’t surprise him that incest was less taboo. It was Hell, after all.

“Your uncle’s fucking your cousin?” Cherri Bomb shouted from the top of the staircase, skipping them altogether by sliding down the rail instead. “Now this I gotta hear!”

“What?” Charlie asked, frowning in confusion. Vaggie whispered something to her; a blush quickly overtook Charlie’s face. “Oh! No, no, it’s not- no. Not like that! My uncle, Mammon-”

Alastor thought he caught a faint undertone of dislike in the way Charlie said her uncle’s name. Interesting; interesting enough to get him fully paying attention again.

“- he adopted Fizz after an... accident at Fizz’s old job, or took custody? I was never really clear on that- anyway, not important! Mammon, he, uh, he was kinda Fizz’s guardian? Father figure? When Fizz was a teenager. We hung out a lot, cause – haha, it’s really hard to make friends when your father is a deadly sin or the king of hell, y’know?”

Charlie didn’t want to talk about this. Thinking about Mammon and Fizz always made her feel... bad. She had missed Fizz so much when Mammon decided to take him away... meeting him again as an adult had been great, even though he was so much older than her now.

“Anyway, we uh. Fell out of contact? When Fizz was old enough to go work for Mammon properly-”

“-wait wait wait,” Angel said, holding his upper hands in a t. “I thought you said Mammon was Fizz’s guardian, not his boss.”

Charlie scratched her forehead, where her horns usually came out. “It’s... a bit of both? The only reason Mammon took custody of Fizz at all was because he won a contest to become Mammon’s next big thing before the accident. Everyone already knew about him, so Mammon couldn’t back out without looking real bad, so he paid for Fizz’s hospital stay-”

“Whoa, hang on, hospital?” Cherri said, knocking back a shot of whatever Husk slid her. “Charlie, man, you’re cuttin’ off half the story!”

Charlie laughed nervously, holding up her hands. “It’s not really – I don’t know what happened, I just know he was in the hospital for a while after an accident at his old circus-”

Alastor cleared his throat. “My dear, if you’re going to lie, you should learn to do it well. You know more than you’re telling us.”

“It’s not – Fizz doesn’t like talking about it, okay?” she said. “I’m not – I’m not gonna talk about it without permission. Please stop asking, guys.”

“But-” Cherri started, only for Niffty to kick her in the shin. “Ow! You little shit, what the fuck was that for?!”

“I want to hear more about the bad boy!” Niffty said, giggling in her way.

“Fizz isn’t really a bad boy-”

“Not him!” Niffty shouted. “Mammon! Tell me more about Mammon!”

It shouldn’t surprise her that Niffty wanted to hear more about Mammon – he really was just... the worst, exactly Niffty’s type, but it did. It also made something heavy settle in her stomach – with even Niffty hanging on to her words, there was no getting out of talking about... everything.

“Can you guys stop cutting Charlie off,” Vaggie snapped, wrapping an arm snugly around her waist. “She doesn’t like talking about this!”

Charlie placed a hand on Vaggie’s shoulder, offering a small smile when Vaggie looked up at her. “It’s okay, Vaggie. They’re just curious,” she said softly. She looked back at the group sat at the bar, sighing. “Though Vaggie’s right. I don’t like talking about this. Can we try to keep our questions until the end? Please?”

Alastor barely reacted, though both Angel and Cherri looked a little contrite. Husk busied himself with wiping down a glass, not looking at her; Niffty couldn’t seem to stop looking at her. About what she expected, honestly. Nobody said anything for a moment – two – before Charlie started talking again,

“Okay. Anyway, where was I? Right, so. Mammon adopted Fizz, probably so he wouldn’t get hurt at the old circus before he could start working for him? Either way, Fizz lived with Mammon and we were friends for a while. We fell out of contact – wait, I’ve already said this, right? Right, okay, hang on.

Fizz started working for Mammon when he was of age, and we fell out of contact. I still make sure to watch all his broadcasted performances, even though we couldn’t see each other, cause Fizz was a really good performer. Anyway, skip... a few years? Six, maybe? And my other uncle, Ozzie, he’s got a new employee that he wants me to meet, so I go down to Lust and it’s – Fizz was there. Fizz was working for Ozzie, had asked about me – Ozzie wanted to know how we knew each other, ‘cause all he really knew was that Fizz was Mammon’s star; he got, uh. Really mad. At Mammon, I mean. It was this whole thing...”

Charlie paused to finally take a breath, rubbing the back of her neck. “I don’t really know how Fizz and Ozzie started dating. One day, they were employee and boss – Ozzie had Fizz host at his nightclub, nothing too big – the next Ozzie was “introducing” me to his boyfriend. Er, he didn’t call Fizz that yet, though. Sin of Lust and all, it would... not be great, for him or Fizz, if there were feelings involved. If it got out.”

Husk raised his hand, waiting until she gestured at him to speak. “If it’d be bad for that to get out, why’re you tellin’ us?” he asked.

“Good question!” she said. “It’s uh, a bit of an open secret, now. There’ll be an article every so often, haha, calling Fizz a gold digger or Ozzie a hypocrite... Ozzie doesn’t really care, anymore, and he makes sure Fizz doesn’t see the ones about him... eight years is a long time to spend worrying about that sort of stuff.”

Charlie’s interrupted by her phone chiming in her pocket. She gasped, rushing over to the television and turning it to Greed’s network. “It’s starting, everyone shut up!”

She hopped up onto the couch, crossing her legs as Vaggie came to join her. It was still the pre-show – Charlie tried not to get too angry at the robo-fizz advertisements, instead distracting herself by watching the others come over and find spots to sit as well.

“You guys don’t have to watch,” she said. “It’s okay, I know it’s not for everyone.”

Angel shrugged from his spot leaning against Cherri’s shins. “Eh, you hyped up the guy so much, I wanna see him perform.”

Charlie beamed as even Alastor came over, taking his customary seat in the armchair by the fire. “You guys...” she said. “I love you guys.”

“Sh!” Cherri said. “It’s starting!”

[siriuslyobsessedwithfiction]

Horcruxes as Seven Deadly Sins

This has been jabbing at my brain for a while, I need to get it out. Idk if someone has already done this.

This will only mention Christian, because I don't think I have enough knowledge about Greek, Roman or any other interpretation of the seven deadly sins.

So, Tom Riddle created seven horcruxes. (actually eight)

It is no secret that Tom Riddle was obsessed with power, because he never had anything of value and thought power was the remedy for his misfortune and a very depressing life. Splitting one's soul is already a sin itself because it's done by murdering someone. Tom Riddle Jr. (I think it's hilarious to call him that so what) created seven of them during various stages of his life. Without further ado, let's review his misdeeds chronologically.

The Diary

The first horcrux he created was by murdering Myrtle, an innocent Muggleborn Ravenclaw student. The basilisk did Tom's bidding. The diary becoming a horcrux is very interesing considering the timeline. He was in fifth or sixth year. By that time he figured out he was the descendant of Salazar Slytherin, but he did not yet know of the tragedy that brought him to life. He thought he was doing noble work by getting rid of the muggleborns and finishing what Salazar intended from the start. Years later, diary Tom talks to Harry about abandoning his filthy muggle father's name, but had Tom already visited his uncle by that time and found out about his parents? Or did Tom murder Myrtle earlier and then was told about his heritage as a diary by the actual corporal Tom? Because when he visited his uncle and found out his father was a muggle, he knocked his uncle out, went to the Riddle manor and killed his father and his grandparents. And stole the Gaunt family ring, which would also become a horcrux. Officially, the diary is considered the first horcrux, so we'll follow that. I will assign the diary the sin of wrath. Tom was angry at his muggle father, weak mother, deranged relatives who destroyed an ancient house and his childhood. However, he still holds his heritage in somewhat of a high regard because, frankly, what else he has left. He took out his wrath on regular bystanders who had no effect on his life. Teenage boy bottles his anger in his diary and holds petty grudges.

Marvolo Gaunt's Ring

Created after Tom spoke to Slughorn about splitting a soul in more than two pieces. A gaudy ring, not even a famous artifact, the last family heirloom of Gaunts. Even though his mother's side of the family was no less pathetic than his father's, Tom did not forsake it completely. He still hid his connection to them, but at least they provided him with the gift of parseltongue and magical talent. I think he was silently...grateful, for the lack of a better term. He felt no sympathy towards his mother even before he found out who she was, but he was grateful for her the way you can be grateful for someone who brought you to this world and gave you gift of magic and did nothing else for you. The ring represents the sin of pride because Tom was not honoring his family, he clung to his terrible ancestry. The word pride is not used as a bad thing in the modern context as much. You can be proud of something. That's not a bad thing, right? Well, in this case, it is. Tom was not ashamed of the things Gaunts did, he was ashamed how they ended up. If he was met with Gaunts who looked and lived like Malfoys but where ten times worse, he wouldn't hide his connection to them and would display his pride. Why else would he keep the ring if he didn't plan to use it. Sentimental reasons.

Salazar Slytherin's Locket

Envy. Tom tracked down the current owner of the locket, killed her and stole it from her. He was envious in a way of Hepzibah Smith, who lived luxuriously, was in touch of her pureblood ancestry, a descendant of Helga Hufflepuff. Meanwhile, Tom, who, in his opinion, should've been born with the same privileges, had to scramble for scraps his whole life and smile politely at others and be of service, instead of the other way around. A prince mistaken for a beggar, forced to live his life, found the crown jewel of his. And some old lady displayed it like it was her own. Technically, it was.

Rowena Ravenclaw's Diadem

Now, what business did Tommy have messing around with other founders' sacred artifacts? He had acquired "his own" ones. He could stop at three horcruxes. Surely, there were risks, consequences of such extreme magic, just take the locket and leave the cup, don't even bother with the lost diadem...Greed. He sniffed around and inquired about it while he was still in Hogwarts, charmed the Grey Lady Helena Ravenclaw to find out its whereabouts and went to bloody Albania to get it.

Why shouldn't Tom take the diadem and the cup as well? Why shouldn't he take other heirlooms and make it his? He's the greatest wizard of all time in the making. What can possibly rival his power? You get the point.

Helga Hufflepuff's Cup

Gluttony. Are we even surprised at this point? He went through all that trouble to get other items, the cup was literally lying right there next to the locket at Hepzibah Smith's house. I'm getting tired, I'm sorry.

Nagini

Sloth. The snake was already unnaturally loyal to him, he was actually acting affectionate towards it. Making a horcrux out of a living being was an unheard concept, but he'd done much weirder things already. The parselmouth and a snake, very original. His easiest and laziest horcrux, one more testament to his power and "pure" blood.

Harry Potter

Lust. Harry was a horcrux he never meant to create. On a fateful night when Voldemort nearly died of his own spell (the first time around), a small piece of his soul attached itself to the only living thing it could find, a baby. All of it, really, began with lust. An ambition gone bitter. Lust for power, immortality, desire to be remembered and stand out. Driven to insanity, orchestrated his own downfall. The lust for power, the only thing he could approximate with love.

[13uswntimagines]

Hesitate (Rose Lavelle X Singer!Reader)

Request: Reader is Famous and releasing a music video. The team watches it, not realizing that it’s actually a relationship reveal or that rose is remembering how you two shot it. 

Basically it’s just team chaos and Rose x Reader romantic fluff with a touch of humor mixed in inspired by the song Hesitate by the Jonas brothers. 

Authors note: Hey dudes, I had fun with this one, so i really hope you enjoy it! Hit me up with Requests (especially baby reader or ABO ones) and comments. Its super motivating to hear what you guys think!

Rose rolled her eyes at her friends, not for the first time. Hell, probably not for the 50th time in the past hour. 

She understood that they were all excited for your new single and music video drop, but they were annoying the shit out of her. 

“Come on Rosie, get hype with us,” 

“No.”

She didn’t want to get hyped. Not without you there. It was why she didn’t even want to attend the team's stupid watch party. She didn’t want to see your face on the projector they used to watch film. She didn’t want to watch the music video the two of you had created together with her friends. 

She just wanted to stay under the covers and call you while it came on. While the world found out your secret. 

But here she was. 

“I heard that this album is more romantic than the last one,” Lindsey said, popping a piece of popcorn in her mouth, as you answered a few more fan questions. 

Rose had to hold back her hum. She knew just how romantic the album was. She had heard all of the songs in various stages of completion. (It kinda came with dating). 

You had trouble expressing your feelings in words, but it was easy for you when you could sing them.

“I mean, the last one was a depressing breakup album,” Kelley easily pointed out, bumping shoulders with her girlfriend.

“She seems like she’s in a much better place this time,” Kristie chimed in. 

Rose knew you were, but she didn’t feel the need to explain that your last album had not been about a girl. Instead, it was about your family. 

You had called it your most cathartic album, and frankly, she knew it was. She knew how freeing it was to finally say what you had been waiting to for so many years. 

“Why don’t we ask her,” Emily suggested, whipping out her phone far too fast for anyone to feel comfortable. 

“Emily no,” Sam gasped, already reaching for her phone. 

“Emily, yes,” The defender said back, bolting to the other side of the room and already typing out a comment. “It’ll be fun to watch the other fans freak out,” 

And then suddenly they all saw Emily's comment pop up on the screen. 

Is the single about your new significant other? 

And the stream of illegible comments that followed it from the fans. 

Rose rolled her eyes, though she didn’t protest further. You also loved to watch the fans freak out.  It was just more fun when she was there to laugh at what they were saying with you.

Hanging out on your album drop night was a tradition the two of you had kept for the 7 years of your relationship. 

She was slightly disappointed she wouldn’t be able to be there for your time square album purchase, but she had responsibilities and you understood that. 

At least she didn’t have to communicate with you on a public forum. She pulled her phone closer to her face. 

You look cute in that bowtie 

She typed the text and hit send (not for the first time that night), smirking when your phone pinged with her ringtone on the projector (a version of the fans chanting 7 nation army). 

You furrowed your eyebrows as you read the text, and a blush bloomed across your face. You cleared your throat, “You guys know I don’t talk about who the songs are about,” 

Your tongue poked out as you read some of the disappointed comments, showing off one of your dimples as your smirk grew. “Plus, I think it’s about time to get this show on the road,” 

You wiggled your eyebrows. 

“Thank you guys for tuning in and hanging out with me, this is Hesitate. I hope you enjoy,” 

You sent one last megawatt smile to the camera and wiggled your fingers as the screen faded to black. 

Pitter patters of rain filled the background, and the black screen turned into wet asphalt.

Rose closed her eyes, remembering the sound of the waves as you stood on the concrete pier and the smell of the ocean from the perch you had shot the scene on.

“Love is inherently terrifying. I think that being in love is working through that fear because you would do anything for that person,” 

Your voice filled the room as the camera panned up to show you and a mystery girl on the Pier. You ran your finger through the girl's hair, brushing it out of her eyes. 

And suddenly, Rose was transported back to that moment, with you. 

******

“This is weird,” Rose mumbled, glancing over at you as you both leaned over the pier railing. 

“It is, but it'll look cool in the end,” You shrugged, you wouldn’t deny that watching the waves below you while 10 different cameras were trained on you was kinda strange, but it was necessary. It was better than having every movement you were supposed to make scripted.  “They’ve gotta have shots for the beginning and ones that they can filter in between the other shots,” 

She hummed at the explanation. It made complete sense why you had to do it, but it didn’t change how odd the whole experience felt. But it didn’t feel bad. She was glad about that. It was why it had taken you nearly two years to convince her to be in one of your videos with you. 

“So what do we do, just stand here and sway?” She asked, a slight scoff in her voice. 

You knew the tone well and were glad it was the playful scorn that indicated some form of enjoyment over her actual annoyed voice. 

“For a bit,” You said, turning towards her and grabbing her hand. You brought it up to your shoulder to get ready for the next section of the video. “And then we’ll get ready for the rain scene,” 

Her nose scrunched, as her other hand came up to your shoulder and yours fell to her waist. “Do I have to?”

“No,” You chuckled, beginning to sway. “But it’ll be fun,” 

She pouted, her head shaking slightly. 

You smirked at the expression, glad that she was having an ok time with all of this (especially with how uncomfortable she had been with the idea in the beginning). “Haven’t you ever dreamed of dancing in the rain?”

“No. I’ve played soccer in the rain and that was more than enough for me,”  She grumbled, still leaning into you. 

“At least this rain will be warm,” You nudged her cheek with your nose. 

She rolled her eyes, trying to fight the slight uptick of her lips. Your insistence was pretty adorable, and she was actually looking forward to being able to say that she had danced with you in the rain. “You say that like it’ll change my mind,”

You hummed, hearing the fondness in her tone, mixed with slight anxiety. 

You knew rose didn’t believe she was the greatest dancer in the world, but together, the two of you would no doubt look amazing. Especially in a rainstorm. 

“I promise I won’t let you fall,” You promised gently, leaning in and pecking her nose. 

She chased your lips, her hands sliding off your shoulders to grip the collar of your leather jacket and pulling you back towards her, connecting your lips in a steaming kiss. You let her, savoring the way your lips moved together. Like they were made for each other. 

Too late She thought, smoothing your collar as she let you pull away. “I didn’t think you would,”

You very carefully brushed a strand of hair from in front of her eyes, your features suddenly turning serious. 

“I would do anything for you,” 

The honesty in your voice should have terrified her, but it didn't. It sent a warm feeling through her chest. It made her feel safe, and it made her love you that much more. The earnest side of you was her favorite after all. 

You slowly leaned forward, connecting your foreheads, pulling her a bit closer to you by your hands on her waist, and carefully beginning to rock to the rhythm of the music. 

She noted how gentle your hands were on her. How you molded yourself to her with so much care. How you held her like she was the most important thing in the world. 

She was after all. 

You placed another very soft kiss on her nose and her cheek, starting to hum the words to the song like they were meant just for her. 

They were after all.

“Pull me close and hold me tight, don’t be scared I’m on your side. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you,”

She knew you meant those words, and she instinctively pulled you closer to her with the arms wrapped around your neck. Her fingers gently tangled in the baby hairs at the back of your head, scratching lightly at your skin. 

It reminded her of the first time she had ever heard that part of the song. How the early morning light was filtering through the windows of your shared Seattle apartment, clueless to the fear coursing through her. You both had just gotten your schedules for the year, and between your tour schedule and her soccer schedule, your days together had been limited to under 50. It had been scary, but in the morning light, you promised the two of you would make it through. Together. 

You had kept your promise. 

She tilted her head up, just slightly unable to fight the urge to connect your lips softly. You hummed in surprise, but leaned into it nonetheless, unbothered by how it had probably ruined the take. 

You would never complain about kissing Rose. Ever. 

You pulled back, smiling gently down at her. “What was that for?”

“Do I have to have a reason to kiss you?” She smirked back, her finger playing with the curls at the very back of your neck. 

You shook your head lightly. “No, I’m just surprised. You’ve kissed me twice today,” 

“I’m full of surprises baby,” Her eyes glimmered with the words, and you couldn’t help the laugh that escaped you. “Trust me, I know,” 

You did know. Rose seemed to make it her mission in life to keep you on your toes, and you loved it. Your banter was one of your favorite aspects of your relationship, and you were glad that it hadn’t faded in the six years that you had been together. 

You pulled her back into you, beginning to sway to the music again, enjoying the way she felt pressed up against you. 

“There's nothing I wouldn’t do for you,” You hummed to the song, twirling her away from you and rolling her back in so her back was to your front. 

Her little giggle made you smile, and you couldn’t fight the urge to kiss her cheek again. She made you feel giddy. Like a small child, and you loved it. 

You twirled her again, and pulled her close, rocking her as the song loop restarted. 

“Cut!” The director yelled, pulling you out of your moment with Rose, and drawing both of your attention to him. 

You liked Tony. Despite his outward cockiness, he had always treated you well, and his partner Steve was an absolute sweetheart. 

He passed his assistant his shiny aviators and took his clipboard as he approached the two of you, and you leaned away from rose slightly, just because you could never focus when she was so close to you. 

“That was amazing you two,” He smiled widely at you, patting his clipboard. “I think the chemistry between you is off the charts on camera,”

Rose’s cheeks flamed at his assessment, and you couldn’t help but kiss them again. 

“Thanks,”   

“We’ve got everything that we need for the first scene. Are you two ready for the water scenes?” He asked, glancing down at his clipboard. 

You made eye contact with Rose. It was her comfort that really mattered to you. “You ready?”

“With you, always,” She hummed, leaning further into you. 

“Then let's do it,”

*****

“It’s gotta be weird filming these things,” 

Rose blinked up at the sound of Lindsey’s voice, and Kelley’s little nudge to her shoulder. 

She shared a look with the older defender, blushing at being caught daydreaming. 

“Like imagine actually dating her while she’s doing things like this with some random actress,” Lindsey continued, completely oblivious to the silent conversation happening next to her. 

Rose had to agree though. Watching you do music videos with random actresses (or random singers) was a very very weird experience. 

She was proud to say that the only one that had ever sparked her jealousy was your performance of Senorita with Camila at the VMA awards, and that was because the young singer didn’t seem to understand that you were already in a committed relationship. 

Maybe that's part of the reason she had agreed to do the music video with you. Maybe she was just ready to be out to the world with you. 

She was so proud to be yours and you hers that you wanted to share it. 

“It’s interesting that they haven’t shown her face yet though,” Sam added, gesturing towards the screen where they could see the girl back, surrounded by white sheets and too fluffy pillows. 

Your finger dragged against her cheek as you transitioned into the first chorus, and she had to admit that it looked amazing and romantic, despite how awkward she had felt filming it. 

******

You flipped your hand, holding Rose’s palm up with your own. 

“Just relax,” You smiled impishly at her, moving your joined hands in slow circles through the air just above your faces. You pushed and pulled, making random shapes in the air for a long minutes before you dragged your fingers down to intertwine with hers. 

“You’re a dork,” Rose chuckled, rolling her eyes when you brought the back of her hand to your lips. 

“Hmm, but I’m your dork. Only yours” You smirked back, glad that she was at least having an OK time despite all of the cameras. You knew that this was the scene she had been most nervous about. It was the most intimate, with her in a tank top and you in just a crew neck, surrounded by fluffy white sheets. 

She let out another low chuckle, using her other hand to brush a curl out of your eyes. “You are,” 

“And you’re mine,” You said. You felt the honesty in your words, and you knew that Rose did too. You pulled her hand to your chest, right over your heart. 

“I will take your pain. And put it on my heart. I won't hesitate. Just tell me where to start” You hummed softly, staring into Rose’s blue eyes like it was only the two of you here in this moment. 

She couldn’t help herself. 

She leaned over you, bracing herself with a hand next to your head, her lips very close to yours. “I thank the oceans for giving me you, you saved me once now ill save you too. I won’t hesitate for you,” 

You hummed the words in tandem, and you knew that she meant them as much as you did. 

You let go of your connected hand, instead choosing to wrap it around her hip, steadying her. 

“Am I yours?” She asked coyly, her breath fanning across your lips. 

You unconsciously licked yours, smirking. 

You surged forward, dropping your hand from her hip to the back of her thigh, using the momentum to flip your positions. 

“You are,” You hummed confidently, leaning down to very gently connect your lips with her. 

“Don’t you ever forget it,” She mumbled against your lips, her hand wrapping in the collar of your shirt to pull you down even further into her. 

“And cut,” Tony’s voice broke you out of the moment, and you jerked back, nearly falling off the bed. 

“Great job you two. Your chemistry is unparalleled,” He continued. “Now I just need some shots of y/n singing,” 

Your cheeks flamed just as much as Rose’s did this time. You hadn’t meant to get so caught up. You didn’t like exhibiting the more intimate aspects of your relationship in front of people. The softness was only for Rose’s eyes. It was just so hard not to with Rose. She made you feel things so deeply, and even now it was difficult to keep your hands to yourself when you were with her. 

You cleared your throat. “Can do,” 

Rose smirked at you, nudging your ribs under the covers. You glared at her. 

Tony clapped, smiling brightly at you. 

“Maybe recreate the moment with Rose's hand on your chest?” He suggested. 

You nodded, intertwining your fingers with Rose’s. You kissed the back of her hand and pulled it back down to your chest, right over your heart. 

You were sure she could feel how quickly it was beating. 

“Like this?” You asked, looking over your shoulder at where he was stationed behind one of the camera screens. 

“Rose lean in just a bit, and you look directly at the ceiling” He directed, his fingers fluttering as she shifted down on the pillow and closer to you. So close that her nose nudged your cheek, helping to relax the sudden tension that had overcome you. 

Relaxing you enough so you could feel natural. 

“Perfect,” He called out, and you glanced at him from the side of your eye, staring directly up at the camera placed above your head. “if you could just say the I’m yours again, and then we’ll take it from the chorus,”

“Sure,” You hummed. 

Rose chucked from beside you, moving her nose against your cheek again. You wouldn’t want to do this type of video with anyone else. 

******

“I mean, they have to be close to each other,” Emily said, waving her hand towards the screen. Rose had to agree. Though the shot again didn’t show her face, it did show the way her nose pressed into your cheeks, even as you moved your joined hands to your heart. 

“Look how comfortable they look together,” The defender continued, oblivious to Rose’s thoughts. 

Lindsey’s head cocked to the side, “Do you think that this is like an actual relationship reveal?”

Kelley snorted at both of her girlfriends, “Why else would they hide the actress’ face?”

Rose rolled her eyes at the obvious answer, but that was your plan after all. 

You wanted the fans to know how important the person in the video with you was. You wanted them to be drawn in and pay attention to how the two of you moved together. That’s exactly what it did. 

It still amazed her how you knew how to get your message across to your fans, and the artistry it took to do it with the subtlety and grace that you did. 

“Like, how cliche is it to come out in a music video,” Emily cackled, earning a glare from Rose. 

You put so much thought into every aspect of what you did, she wouldn’t let her friends minimize that. 

“She’s not coming out,” Rose grumbled, crossing her arms over her chest. “She‘s just revealing her relationship,”

“It’s more than we’ve ever gotten before,” Lindsey shrugged, raising an eyebrow at Rose as the image on the screen changed. 

It was a high shot of a full stadium, each fan holding up a light so they looked like stars. All except for one. 

The spotlight on you also happened to light up a girl in the audience, but again all the fans would be able to see was her back. Your eyes never left her, despite the camera flying over the audience. 

It was an incredible shot, one that conveyed that no matter how much you were singing to the fans, really you were singing to her. 

“God, imagining being the only one she’s actually singing to when she’s on stage,” Kelley said, waving her hand at the shot. 

“Imagine them actually shooting it,” Sam countered, and Rose couldn’t help but shrug. 

*****

The hum of drones was loud, even as you stood together in front of the stage. It was weird to watch the audience file in and still have you next to her. 

You almost never got to see the audience trail in with her. You were always backstage, getting ready, or tucked away so no one saw you were a surprise guest before they were supposed to. 

But here, with only 500 people, it was easy to stay. 

“Don’t worry, Quinn and Lexa will be with you the whole time,” You mumbled, kissing her cheek and pulling her more tightly to your chest. 

“I wasn’t worried,” she hummed, her hands scratching over your arms as she leaned back into your warm form. 

She wasn’t used to you being so openly affectionate in public, but she couldn’t find it within herself to complain. 

She knew you were nervous about her being in the crowd without you. That’s why you had assigned your top security to be beside her, but the fans didn’t know who she was. Not to you anyway. 

“I know, but I was,” You muttered, earning a giggle from her. 

Your overprotective nature was something the two of you constantly joked about. 

“I don’t know what I would do if I lost you,” you added, squeezing her just a bit, unaware of the cameras on you or the microphone recording your conversation. 

Rose chuckled, turning in your arms so you were facing each other, and pressing your foreheads together. “You haven’t lost me this far, I’m not gonna go running away now,” 

You tensed slightly. 

Your relationship had been far from perfect. You had a hard time expressing yourself in the beginning, and your track record in relationships wasn’t great when you met Rose. 

But she had stuck with you through the 3 am fight and makeups, through the pressure of your first album and the success that had only brought more pressure, through your growing pains. 

She taught you what unconditional love was, and you learned how to let down your walls for her. 

You loved her with your whole heart. 

“I’d chase you if you did,” You hummed. “You’ve got a piece of me that I’ll never get back,” 

“I’ve got no plans to give it back,” She chuckled, tilting her head slightly to connect your lips, her fingers tangling in the little curls at the very back of your neck. 

You let out a low groan in your throat, your fingers squeezing her hips gently and pulling her impossibly closer to you. 

“Very good ladies,” Tony clapped, and you jerked away from Rose, earning a giggle from her as she caught your shoulders to steady you. 

“Oh, Um thanks,” You mumbled, adamantly not looking at the man. You may or may not have forgotten him and the crowd were even there. 

Tony smiled gently at you, “We’re ready if you two want to get into position?” 

Your fingers flexed around Rose’s hips. You weren’t ready to let her go. You would never be ready. 

“We’re going to do the wide shots, and then we’ll clear the stadium for the water shots,” Tony continued with the wave of his hand, already heading back towards the cameras. 

“I guess that’s our cue,” You breathed out, all of your attention turning back to Rose. 

She smiled gently at you. “We’ll only be apart for like an hour. It’s not gonna kill you,” 

You pouted. “I know, but I’ll still miss you,” 

“You’re a dork,” Rose rolled her eyes, shoving your shoulder. 

You grabbed the limb, pretending to be wounded. “But I’m your dork,”

Rose rolled her eyes again, reaching out and grabbing your belt loops to pull you back to her. 

“Say it again for me?”

You leaned closer, connecting your foreheads again. 

“I’m yours. Every part of me,” You murmured against her lips, the sincerity dripping through every syllable, even as your lips ticked up into a smirk. “even the crazy music parts,” 

Rose’s lips ticked up to mirror your expression. “I’m yours too,” She hummed. “all weird soccer traditions included,” 

You tilted forward, connecting your lips again, just as she finished the sentence. 

“Wouldn’t have it any other way,” You said as you parted. 

“Now go rock the stage,” 

She leaned up and pecked your lips before shoving you away again. 

“You better enjoy it,” You huffed, stepping away from her and towards where the stage managers were waiting for you. 

“You know I will,” She laughed loudly, moving towards her own waiting managers. 

You blew her a kiss before turning away. You would put on a show just for her. 

******

“Holy shit,” Rose’s eyes went wide as the sound of the audience overwhelmed the music, and the shot zoomed in over her shoulder so you were front and center. 

Then the shot changed, flashing to you in the same position in every scene you had shot. The noise of the audience got louder as the images shifted more rapidly, suddenly going still on a closeup of your face. 

It was easy to see you had someone wrapped in your arms, your lips close to her ear. 

And then your voice sounded, soft but sincere just over the audience. 

I don’t know what I’d do without you. You have a piece of me I’ll never get back. I’m yours. 

The scene shifted on screen, pulling out wide to show you holding her at the pier. 

The sound of her own voice shocked her. I’m yours too.

But she didn’t have time to process before the song restarted, the bridge building as the rain crashed around the two of you on screen. 

“Damn,” Emily muttered, leaning back in her chair. 

It truly was an incredible sight, you twirling a girl in the rain on the pier, spliced in with the image of the same dance on the beach and in an entirely empty stadium. 

It was a breathtaking shot, but Rose was still caught up in how they had used her voice. How they had taken words that were meant only for you and her. 

“Imagine fucking dancing with her in the rain,” Kristie cackled as the video rolled on. 

“Imagine her saying that to you,” Lindsey countered. 

“And then writing a song about it,” Kelley hummed. Side eyeing where Rose was still frozen on the bed. 

She could have sworn that the last, whispered line was Rose. The midfielder also held a strong resemblance to the girl you were with on screen. 

She knew the midfielder was in a relationship and had been for a long time, but it couldn’t be with you, right?

Rose let out a low sound of agreement from the back of her throat. It did feel good that you wrote songs about her. 

It felt even better that she was one of the first ones to get to hear the songs you wrote. There was nothing quite like you sitting on your living room floor, strumming your guitar to a tune she didn’t quite know, or the two of you listening to a new track in the car for the first time. 

“But it’s gotta suck filming rain scenes,” Emily said suddenly. “Like imagine all that cold water crashing around you, and then having to stay out in it,” 

Rose shrugged. “It’s warm rain,”

****

“Easy,” You hummed, very carefully steading Rose as she tripped over her own two feet in the sand. “Can’t ruin the outfit before we even get it on camera,” 

She rolled her eyes goodnaturedly at you, leaning further into your form. She hadn’t expected the sand on the beach to be so deep. “You’re an asshole,” 

You shrugged, your fingers tightening just a bit where they rested just above her hips as she wobbled again. “No, I’d be an asshole if I threw you into the tide,” 

You tilted your head towards the water growing closer to your position, just barely away from where the light stands stood. Soon they would be touching, but you didn’t really mind. The production staff had it all planned out anyway, and you were sure they were waterproof considering that the rain was coming. 

“You wouldn’t,” She huffed, pinching your side and earning a chuckle from you. 

“No, I won’t,” You agreed, chuckling slightly.  “It’d ruin the video,” 

She actually pushed you this time, earning a louder laugh. “You’re an ass,” 

You had expected it. The two of you had been in the sand for hours, taking various shots. 

“So you’ve said,” You smirked, pulling her back to you. “Just a few more minutes and we can go back to our hotel and chill,” 

You followed that up with a kiss on her forehead, ignoring the low hum of the rain machine above you. 

“I still can’t believe you booked a five-star,” Rose mumbled, leaning her head back on your chest. “I don’t even want to know how much it costs per night,”

“I didn’t pick the hotel,” You said, beginning to rock with her again as the rain machine made another noise. “It’s in the production budget or whatever,” 

“Just know I plan on putting it to good use,” Rose huffed, moving her body in time with you, trying not to glance up at the machine. 

They never told you when they started it, wanting your reactions to be real, but she had learned from the pier not to stare up at it. A face full of water wasn’t very fun, not when the droplets were made to show up on screen. 

“How very economic of you,” You chuckled, twirling her gently before pulling her back. 

“I’m nothing if not pragmatic,” She said back seriously as the machine above you gave a loud whoosh and the water started to fall. 

“It’s one of the reasons I love you,” You mumbled sweetly, kissing her hair again. 

“Is it?” She asked, letting you twirl her again, her hair spinning out in the rain. 

“Hmm,” The sound came from the back of your throat, your eyes following her form as you spun her again, before rolling her back towards you. 

She batted her eyes at you. “Tell me more,” 

“Well,” You rolled your own eyes, swaying as the song restarted. “How do I love thee, let me count the ways,” 

Her lips ticked up at your mention of Shakespeare. While she loved his work, she knew you weren’t a major fan. You still sat through every production she wanted to see for her. 

She also knew you had memorized the poem, and translated it into the song All of Me just for her. 

“Are you going to quote the poem for me?” 

You shrugged, seeming unbothered by the water crashing around you. “I wasn’t, but I can if you want,” 

She hummed. “Your own poems are fine,” 

You blushed, even as cool water washed over your face, leaning in and kissing her gently. “I love you. I am who I am because of you. You are every reason, every hope, and every dream I've ever had, and no matter what happens to us in the future, every day we are together is the greatest day of my life. I will always be yours,” 

She couldn’t help but laugh at the quoted line from her favorite movie. “So are you my Noah?” 

“And cut!” Toney bellowed before you could answer, and the rain ceased with as much vigor as it had started. “While I love your chemistry still, we can’t use any direct quotes, so try and keep it off the cuff,” 

“That was off the cuff?” You pouted, whipping a fallen curl out from in front of your eyes and into the rest of the hair plastered to your head by the rain. 

“Yeah, she’s just a dork who is good at memorizing literature to pull out at random moments,” Rose agreed. 

It had been a quark you had since high school. One she had grown to cherish. 

“I’m not a dork,” You grumbled. 

“You are,” Rose cackled, shoving your shoulder, laughing harder when your pout deepened. 

“Fine, but I’m only your dork,” 

“This is what im talking about,” Tony interrupted you, as you pulled Rose closer to you. “Keep it out of copyright law,” 

You rolled your eyes, waving your hand dismissively. “Shakespeare is in the public domain,” 

“Not the point,” Tony said seriously, frustration breaking into his tone for the first time. “Give me something organic to work with,” 

The problem was that it was organic from you. It was easier to talk using the words of others than it was to use your own. Especially when there were hundreds of cameras on you. 

It was easier for you when you were alone with Rose, or you felt alone at least. 

You gave him a node and he spun on his heel waving his hands towards the cameramen. 

“From the top,” 

You took a deep breath as the rain machine creaked above you, wrapping your arms around Rose's waist as hers found their way to your shoulders, her fingers tangling in the damp curls at the back of your neck. 

“I’ll be your Noah too, if that’s what you want me to be,” You whispered conspiratorially, toying with the back hem of her shirt. 

“Let’s keep our clothes on until we get to the stupid fancy hotel,” Rose said back, equity as soft, her voice dipping. “And then you can show me how much of that scene you remember,” 

You wiggled your eyebrows at her change in octave, beginning to sway as the music started. “As you wish,” 

She slapped your shoulder at the line, shaking her head, just as the rain restarted around you. 

“Shut up and dance with me,” 

You smirked at your own line being repeated to you. “Remember we need to be organic,” 

*****

“How do you know that?” Emily asked, pulling Rose back into reality. 

She blinked at her friends and their accusing faces, how was she supposed to tell them? 

Again the music on screen paused and she turned just in time to see the closeup of your face, your drenched curls stuck to your forehead, your lips just inches from the microphone. 

You took one breath and then another, the sound echoing through the room just as it had echoed through the stadium. 

“Because,” Rose muttered, entirely engrossed in the music video. 

The shot slowly pulled out and turned to show herself standing just across from you, close enough that she could almost touch the microphone too. 

“I won’t hesitate for you,” 

Her on-screen self took a step forward and allowed you to pull her into your arms. “I know,” 

“You’re dating Y/n?!”

“Why didn’t you tell us?!” 

“Damn,” 

“How long?!” 

The words of her friends blended together as the two of you shared a long kiss on screen, chaste by any real measure, but obviously full of love. “Yes, I’ll marry you,” 

It was genius to cut out your actual proposal. The words you had said while the two of you were alone on stage, another moment when you didn’t know the cameras were rolling. It fit in so well to how you described it, writing your vows before you actually wrote your vows. 

The song was a promise to her, and the video showed how much you intended to keep it. 

“I’d give it all for you,” 

The screen turned black and the words she said yes were written in your messy cursive, and a smaller yes in her own scrawl joined your words. 

The squeals of her friends nearly drowned out the last line of the song as they threw themselves at her. 

She would give everything for you too. 

Even if you were a dork. 

“Yes, you’ll get to meet her Sonnett. Stop shaking me,” 

[edenesth]

Undying Bonds (Part 10)

Pairing: Hongjoong x fem!reader, Seonghwa x fem!reader

AU: zombie apocalypse au

Word Count: 4.8k

Summary: What could be worse than being separated from the love of your life in a zombie apocalypse? Hongjoong was forced to leave you behind with his friend, Seonghwa, as he ventures out alone to search for the rest of his missing group members. Will Hongjoong be successful in his solo mission to find his members? Will he be able to return to you unscathed? And what happens when you're stuck with his caring best friend, who is hopelessly in love with you, for too long?

Part 9 | Masterlist | Part 11

District 9.

That was the name that only insiders were aware of, only people with the opportunity of stepping foot into SKZ HQ would know.

Though not many people have survived after learning of the name, since they were mostly prisoners taken in either for information, for Seungmin to conduct his many zombie science experiments on, or worse, both.

If you're lucky- or unlucky enough to find yourself in District 9 for whatever reason, chances are it most likely won't be easy to live and tell the tale later on. 'Consider it a small price to pay for having the pleasure to witness such luxury again', was the famous final sentence that Minho never fails to bestow upon his victims before sending them off to meet their cruel ends.

Under different circumstances, perhaps Hongjoong would have been impressed by what he was seeing when they finally made their way into the legendary Stray Kids Headquarters.

Unlike his younger friends, he couldn't find it in himself to feel even the least bit excited about any of this, especially not when he was fully aware of how many innocent lives it must have cost for this insane amount of extravagance to come to fruition.

Hongjoong and his boys were eventually led to the furniture store where the rest of their friends were currently resting at.

The captain's anxieties were slightly eased when he spots Seonghwa, Mingi and Jongho safe and sound. He watched as Yunho, Yeosang and Wooyoung wasted no time in running towards their friends but he stopped in his tracks when the realisation hits, you were absolutely nowhere to be seen.

"Where's my girlfriend?"

That was all it took for Minho to understand who he was referring to. There was only one female amongst all the people here now after all.

The boys stared after their captain who was busy speaking to Stray Kids' second-in-command before he eventually holds a hand up to let them know that he'll be back soon, rushing off in the direction they'd last seen you disappear off to with Bang Chan.

Seonghwa's heart calmed slightly, knowing that Hongjoong would be there to protect you now. He wasn't sure how to feel; on one hand, he was happy for his best friend to be back, but on another hand, there goes his chances of confessing to you. He eventually decides all that really mattered to him was your safety and happiness, whether or not that included himself in the picture.

He snaps out of his thoughts when Mingi and Jongho inquire about the one missing group member, the news that they were about to receive would send the three of them collapsing in an instant.

Meanwhile, the high levels of adrenaline that were running through Hongjoong's veins simply at the thought of seeing you again was enough to send his heart racing. With the rough directions provided by Minho, he makes his way hurriedly to your specific whereabouts in the annoyingly enormous building. Blinded by his eagerness to reunite with you, Hongjoong failed to take notice of the sly glint in the gang member's eyes.

Minho intentionally left out one vital detail, the captain does not know that his girlfriend was alone with Bang Chan.

And the motive behind the right-hand man's actions? It was simply to wreak havoc; Minho could honestly care less about whatever affiliations you had with his leader and would quite frankly rather Chan put an end to this nonsense because he looked pathetic ever since you made your appearance.

So, if sending Hongjoong your way unannounced was what it would take to stir up some trouble, he's all for it.

Hongjoong slowed down in his tracks when he could faintly hear what sounded like your voice speaking and he strained to try listening carefully to what you were talking about.

He stilled when he heard the name Chris coming from you as you tiredly instructed said person to let go of you, that immediately made him pick up his pace again but it wasn't until the following words spoken by the unfamiliar male voice from across the hall that made his blood boil.

"No please, it's still me! I'm still yours, I swear! Just... at least let me explain myself, yeah? All I ask is for you to hear me out this once, you must know how much it pained me to believe you were gone... You were my everything- you still are!"

Oh no, you don't. That's my girl.

The captain saw red when his eyes finally landed on the two figures by the large window, he dared say it almost looked romantic had it not been his own girlfriend forcefully held in the arms of another man.

Still caught up in your conversation, neither you nor Bang Chan had realised a third person stalking his way up to the both of you.

In one strong but gentle pull, Hongjoong had you back safely in his arms at long last. He almost cried in relief at the familiar feeling of having you so close to him again, he felt like he was finally home.

"I won't tell you twice, stay away from her."

The tight squeeze that he gave you when noticing how tense you were managed to help you relax as you sink deeper into his embrace, the small action was enough for him to feel like he could breathe again.

Enraged by the sudden interruption, Chan proceeds to tell Hongjoong off rudely, "And who the hell are you? Know your place, this is between me and her!"

"I'm her boyfriend," He answered proudly, almost laughing out loud at the gang leader's audacity because who was he to raise his voice? The flabbergasted expression on Chan's face made the captain further grin in victory, "B-boyfriend..?"

Hongjoong's heart swelled with pride when you nodded to confirm and pressed closer to him to prove to Chan that he truly was your other half.

Giving your childhood friend a once over almost in distaste, your boyfriend smirks in amusement, "I think this is exactly where I should be, right by her side. Can't say the same for you though, Christopher."

Of course, Hongjoong knows all about Christopher.

There was not a single thing that either of you bothered to hide from one other. You knew each other like the back of your own hands.

And you'd told him all about your past in Australia; about Christopher, about the accident that nearly took your life, about how Christopher had abandoned you after the accident, about your brutal journey in emerging from that darkness all alone.

The heartache that Hongjoong felt when he learned of what you had gone through was something he'd never let himself forget.

He vowed to stay with you always and swore he'd never forgive this Christopher person for what he did or more like, what he didn't do. And here this jerk was, standing right in front of him, having the cheek to beg for your forgiveness after what he's put you through.

Chan laughs bitterly at you, choosing instead to completely disregard your boyfriend's presence, "Is he that special? So much that you actually got into a relationship with him?" Anyone could tell from his tone that he was clearly disheartened by the new information.

You sighed in exasperation, screwing your eyes shut to gather your thoughts for the most effective way to end the conversation.

"Yes, yes, he is. And he has a name, it's Hongjoong. I can tell you how much of an amazing person he is and I know you wouldn't care at all but he means everything to me. He was there for me when you weren't, so please show him some respect… It's the least you could do for me now."

Your former childhood friend's face fell and you looked away from him, the last thing you needed to feel was guilt for him.

"Listen, Chris, can we let whatever happened in the past to stay in the past? I really do not wish to relive any of that, I'd appreciate it if you could just drop this once and for all. There's literally a whole damn zombie apocalypse going on and this is honestly the last thing I want to talk about right now."

At your words, Hongjoong ran his hands up and down your arms in a consoling manner to remind you that he was there with you. Smiling gratefully up at him, you took the moment to look over his features that you missed so dearly before continuing, "And I haven't seen my boyfriend in a while now, can we please be left alone for some privacy?"

Your question was not really a question, the finality in your tone signalled the end of your conversation with Chan.

The gang leader's shoulders slumped in defeat and he did as you asked, not wanting to further upset you. But that didn't mean he's giving up though, he won't be letting you out of his sight so easily now that he's found you again.

For now, just for now, he'd let you spend some time with that little boyfriend of yours.

I'll be back for you, I swear.

Flashing one last glare at Hongjoong as if to challenge him, Chan stormed off with fists clenched tightly to his sides in reluctance. You rolled your eyes at the ridiculous exchange when seeing your boyfriend's eyes also remaining glued to the gang leader's back, clearly displeased.

Once Chan was completely out of sight, you didn't waste another second to throw your arms around your lover's shoulders, instinctively burying your face in the crook of his neck.

Your bodies pressed close as if trying to bridge the time and distance that had separated you. The embrace was tight, as if you were afraid that letting go would mean losing each other all over again.

Tears welled up in your eyes and his, glistening like dewdrops as you held onto one another. The weight of the separation, the longing and the uncertainty melted away in that single embrace. Your fingers found solace in each other's hair, on the small of your backs, as if mapping out the contours of a familiar and treasured landscape.

As you pulled back slightly, you met his eyes and you shared a gaze that was both intense and tender. Every unspoken word, every emotion that had been bottled up during your time apart, seemed to pass between you in that moment. Your eyes spoke of missed moments, of countless thoughts that had been dedicated to the memory of the other and of a love that had only grown stronger in the face of separation.

"You're back," You whispered, tears rolling steadily down your cheeks as he moved to wipe them away, his touch as soft as a feather, "I'm back, my love, and I'm never leaving you again." The look in his eyes was all it took for you to believe him completely.

With a quivering smile, a mixture of laughter and tears, Hongjoong closed the remaining gap between you.

Your lips met in a kiss that was both fervent and gentle, a sweet testament to the depth of your connection. He pressed his lips against your softer ones over and over again, savouring the feeling he feared he'd never be able to experience again.

The world around you seemed to fade into insignificance, leaving only the sensation of your lips touching and your breaths mingling.

"God, I missed you like crazy," He whispered in between, the words sending the familiar warm feeling throughout your body, "Missed you too." You muttered, your words were quickly muffled by his lips.

As the kiss deepened, it was a fusion of emotions—a mixture of relief, joy and an aching awareness of the time you had lost. Hongjoong pulled you closer when his mind drifted back to the moment Soyeon had held him at gunpoint, the time he thought he'd never get to see you or be with you again.

His hands roamed, tracing the lines of your face, cupping your cheeks while yours rested firmly on his shoulders. It was a tactile affirmation of the other's presence, a way of assuring yourselves that this moment was real.

The taste of salt on your lips was from the tears that continued to fall. The kiss was a cascade of emotions, a testament to the journey you had been on individually and the reunion that had brought you back together. It was a declaration of love that needed no words.

Eventually, you pulled away slightly, your foreheads touching as you shared a quiet, intimate moment.

Your breaths were unsteady, your hearts still racing from the intensity of the embrace and the kiss. At that moment, as you held each other close, you knew that no amount of time or distance could ever truly keep you both apart again.

"I love you so much," He whispered, the words immediately bringing a smile onto your face, "I love you too, Joong."

Dread fills your being when you and the captain return to the furniture store to join the rest of the group only for you to sense the sombre atmosphere and upon double confirmation, you realise that one person was indeed missing.

"W-where's Sannie?" You stammered, your heart picking up its speed when the guys avoided your eyes. You hated your mind for immediately jumping to the worst possible conclusions.

Maybe he went to the washroom? Don't scare yourself just yet.

Looking to Seonghwa for answers, you find him biting down harshly on his bottom lip as he painfully held his cries back.

Maybe somewhere deep down, you could have guessed what had probably happened whenever your sixth sense tingled as if to let you know that something's gone terribly wrong but you refused to believe what your gut was telling you until you hear the truth with your own ears.

You could already feel the lump forming in your throat when your boyfriend sits you down on a nearby couch to prepare you for what he was about to tell you.

Your heart wrenched when you catch sight of Mingi and Jongho sobbing pitifully into their hands while Yunho and Yeosang held them close, Wooyoung was staring scarily blankly ahead of him with his hand placed firmly over Seonghwa's trembling ones.

Hongjoong got on his knees in front of you, his grip on your hand tightening and you hated how sad he looked, his eyes glistened with tears, "Sannie… H-he's uhh…" Blinking rapidly and clearing his throat, he took a deep breath before willing himself to just spit it out.

"He's gone… forever."

The captain immediately moved to settle beside you, wordlessly gathering you in his arms when you visibly froze.

Time seems to stop, the words hitting you like a heavy blow to the chest. Your heart skips a beat and a cold numbness spread through your body, making it difficult to breathe. It's as if the air itself has thickened and the world around you fades into a hazy backdrop.

Shock was the first emotion that courses through you, a disbelief that this reality could actually be true. Your mind struggles to process the information, grappling with the enormity of what you've just heard. You want to reject the news, to declare it a terrible mistake, but deep down, you know it's real.

The initial shock is swiftly followed by an intense wave of pain that crashes over you like a relentless storm. It feels as if your heart is being squeezed, an ache that's both physical and emotional.

Your eyes well up with tears and the first sob escapes your lips, raw and unfiltered. It's a guttural sound that echoes the anguish within, breaking Hongjoong's heart as he holds you closer.

Every detail of San flashes before your mind's eye—his bright and adorable smile, his infectious laughter, the way he moved and spoke. You find yourself replaying memories in a desperate attempt to keep him alive in your thoughts. Each recollection is like a lifeline, a way to connect with San who's no longer physically present.

Why… why did it have to be poor Sannie of all people in this world?

Anguish grips you as you grapple with the reality of his absence. It's a heavy feeling, an ache that settles in your chest and refuses to let go. The world suddenly feels like a different place, one that's been robbed of its vibrancy and warmth.

As the shock and pain ebb and flow, you find yourself caught in a cycle of disbelief. You half-expect him to walk through the door, to call for you, to remind you all that he's still here. It's a desperate hope that clashes with the harsh reality and it only serves to deepen the ache in your heart.

"How..?" Your boyfriend pulls away slightly to meet your now red and swollen eyes, "How d-did he… what happened?"

Pressing his lips against your temple for a moment to ground himself, he squeezed his eyes shut as he begins to fill you in on everything that's happened from the beginning of his journey until this moment.

There were no exact right words that could be used to describe the intense ache bubbling in your chest as you listened to Hongjoong painfully recount how San was already bitten when you were all separated to how he tried to keep Yunho away from him as he slowly turned, and lastly, how he ultimately pleaded for your boyfriend, his brother, to put an end to his life.

Mingi and Jongho could hardly believe or digest the words coming out of their group leader's mouth. It was as if a huge chunk of their souls were mercilessly ripped away from them with the gaping void left by San's absence, their one and only sunshine.

The amount of guilt you felt for not knowing or being there with him when he was going through all of that alone was almost suffocating.

He must have been so scared. God, and we didn't even know while he was suffering all by himself...

You, Seonghwa, Mingi and Jongho didn't even get the chance to say goodbye to him. All the regrets going through your mind torturing you endlessly; you should have been more attentive, you should have protected him better, you should have been the one bitten instead. San was the last person on earth to deserve such a cruel fate.

The violent sobs racking your body did nothing to ease the agony within you, your knuckles slowly turning white from clutching so tightly onto Hongjoong's shirt.

He pushed your head firmly into the crook of his neck and somehow, the specific action reminded you of Seonghwa almost instantly. Seonghwa, who has done this countless times as his way to console you. Seonghwa, who was always there for you no matter what.

Pushing yourself slightly off of your boyfriend's chest, you glanced worriedly over at Seonghwa.

He was obviously not taking the news any better than you. Wooyoung did his best to stay strong for his hyung at the moment but there was only so much he could do, when he himself was going through the exact same pain of losing his best friend.

As if feeling your eyes on him, Seonghwa stares tearfully back at you, the shared look between you holding some sort of unspoken message that only the two of you could understand. Your heart hurt at the sight of his tears, he was always so strong for you and seeing him like this now affected you more than you had expected.

A part of you wanted to go to Seonghwa and to be his comfort too but Hongjoong's touch on your face immediately snaps you out of it.

Your attention was once again taken over by your boyfriend, who was apologising for not being a good enough leader. His words only made everyone in the room protest loudly against the statement, all assuring him that none of this was his fault and that he's done the best that he could, given the circumstances.

"You mind telling me what the hell that was all about?"

Minho snarled, he was pissed at Chan for the display of weakness. For a moment back there, Chan looked nothing like the intimidating gang leader that he was known for being and instead, he resembled some weak loser overwhelmed by stupid emotions.

All this just because of some girl, Minho didn't take his boss to be some sappy hopeless romantic. The leader's behaviour from earlier was enough embarrassment to last for a lifetime.

If he didn't know any better, he'd almost say Chan was in love.

Disgusting.

The elder of the two lets out a deep sigh as he stared out at the view of the ruined city from the futuristic electronic gadget store that is now being used as his office. He turns around in his chair and glances up to find a very disgruntled-looking Minho.

"She's my- Look, she's an… an old friend from Australia, okay? I was just… surprised to see her again, I guess. Listen, I know you wish to discuss work but not right now, Minho. I've got to sort things out with her first… or else, I-I can't…"

To Minho's chagrin, the leader appeared somewhat abashed as he struggled to form a proper sentence, it was as if the simple thought of that woman alone was enough to fluster him this much.

Was this really Bang Chan?

The great leader of Stray Kids, stuttering like an elementary school kid over some girl? This was utterly ridiculous and there is no way in hell the second-in-command would stand for it.

Infuriated, Minho scoffed loudly before slamming his palms against the desk separating them as he glared down at his boss.

"You're joking, right? I don't care who that lady was and what she was to you but you need to pull yourself together. I never thought the day would come when I'd have to say this but you're being embarrassing, Chan. As if acting like some lovesick fool wasn't enough, you had to do it in front of our new recruits too? Way to set a good example!"

Hearing this from another person's point of view really did make Chan feel slightly ashamed of his behaviour, the new members must take him for a fool now.

"Thanks to Jisung, one operation's already down. I mean sure, we managed to take everything from the convenience store but with that, came seven extra mouths to feed. By right, we should be getting to work immediately. And now, you're saying you want to do what..?" Minho was fuming at this point.

Chan's nostrils flared at his younger counterpart's boldness before growling lowly in his alpha tone that he'd usually used to intimidate his members when needed.

"Have I been too lenient lately? Don't you dare speak to me like that, Lee Minho. You don't even know half the story. And remember your goddamn place, that's hyung to you by the way." His snarky attitude finally made the younger's lips tug upwards slightly in approval.

Now that's more like it.

"You're right, hyung, I don't. And I'm not interested in learning about any of it, need I remind you of who exactly you are right now? Like you said, she's from the past so don't you think it'd do you good to leave things where they were before?"

This was important to Minho, he needed to know he could trust his leader to still do a good job because Chan was the first and only person to have earned his respect, it'd be a shame to lose any of that over something this silly. After all, he only stayed loyal to Chan because they shared the same vision.

If the gang leader were to stray from their initial plans, Minho would be left with no choice but to take necessary actions. Though he hopes it'll never have to come to that, he'd hate to have to bite the hand that feeds him but there's only so much he's willing to tolerate.

Chan runs a hand frustratingly through his hair, how he wished his friend could just understand the way he was feeling.

He was only human after all, he has emotions too but he supposed that might have been too much to expect from Minho. He's never met anyone quite as cold-hearted and ruthless as Minho, he used to admire the younger for that quality but it was proving to be a bit of a pain in the ass as of this moment.

"You don't get it, it's not that simple! For the longest time, I thought she was dead, Minho, dead! Her 'death' was what made me into the person that I am today, it was because of her that you even got this version of me!"

The younger of the two raises a brow daringly, as if to challenge his boss, "So, are you saying that just because she's alive now, you'll go back to being your weak and pathetic old self?"

"No- God no, Minho, that's not at all what I meant. It's far too late for that anyway… but she's important to me, alright? I must… She went through a lot because of me, I have to make it up to her somehow…"

Minho couldn't believe his ears, "Wow, I hope you realise just how ridiculous you sound. Well, she might as well continue to be dead to you because she's already belonged to someone else anyway. I know that the leader of Jongho's group is her boyfriend."

The annoyed look on Chan's face proceeds to bring Minho satisfaction, "Besides, weren't you the one who taught all of us that 'in this selfish world, only the selfish succeed'? Will you please stop all this useless whining over spilt milk? We have work to do, hyung."

The mere reminder of you having a boyfriend now was enough to set Chan on fire again, making him shoot up from his seat.

"What did you just say?"

Had it been another member, they most likely would have peed their pants just from his tone but Minho was a special case, he wasn't one to back down, "I said, we have work to do," Chan's eye twitched in irritation, "No, before that."

Minho smirked, making it his mission to continue provoking the leader, "Oh, you loved that part, didn't you? I said, she already belongs to someone else. I'm sorry, was that a hard pill to swallow?"

He pouted tauntingly, the hateful grin on his face doing nothing to ease the rage burning within Chan, "Just forget her, hyung. That road's a dead end and we all know it, no point wasting your time." Rubbing more salt in the wound, his goal was to make the leader give up on all thoughts of making up with you.

"I guess you're right. She may be taken now, but not for long though. I'll make sure of that."

That was not at all what Minho had expected him to say, he was hoping to discourage his boss from further involving himself with you. Instead, he realises now that what he said was only fuelling Chan to fight harder for you.

"You just can't let this go now, can you? I swear to god, if taking her out is what it means for you to get a grip on yourself then I will do it."

That did it.

Minho never should have underestimated the depth of Chan's feelings for you. In a flash, the elder male wrapped his fingers around the younger's neck in a grip so tight that it had Minho scratching desperately at the leader's hands for air.

"Lay one finger on her and I swear, you'll be shown no mercy."

As fearless as he is, Minho values his life enough to know Chan was not at all kidding, "I'm your boss, Minho, just remember that and do as I say. We will get back to work soon, don't you worry. I just need some time to… debrief our new friends, is all."

The leader releases his grip eventually, "Now get the hell out of my sight, I need to think."

With a hand on the skin of his throat that was sure to start bruising soon, Minho clenches his jaw tightly at the humiliation he just suffered. Chan has never laid a hand on him thus far, and for him to do this over a mere woman from his past. It's something Minho finds completely unforgivable.

Was Chan even still in his right mind? Was he really putting work aside to waste his time on such silly emotions instead? Well, Chan is sorely mistaken if he thinks Minho will stand by and watch idly as he fools around.

Not wanting to piss his boss off any further at the moment, the right-hand man smiles sarcastically at his superior, "As you wish."

He curtsies dramatically before stalking out.

Oh, I'll remember that, Bang Chan.

We're nearing the climax soon, I estimate the story to end around Part 15. I might do some bonus parts later on if I'm feeling up for it or if there are requests for any. But for now, thank you for reading and as always, don't be shy to let me know your thoughts on this part!

Tag list: @aurasblue @tmtxtf @park-simphwa @sunnyhokyu @felixs-voice-makes-me-wanna

All Rights Reserved © edenesth // DO NOT REPOST, TRANSLATE, PLAGIARISE OR REPURPOSE.

[aclowntiny]

Kalon- Model!Jun x Female!Assistant!Reader

My piece for September Candyland 🍭 Kalon: beauty that is more than skin deep. Inspired in part by Jukebox the Ghost’s Jumpstarted hehe

Word Count: 3500 | Model AU, Coworkers to Lovers | Warnings: minor sexism, rude coworkers (not Jun), physical insults but not targeted to any feature

Tagging @chwecandi & @sunnylovespickles too just in case I messed up the tumblr tag 😄

“He’s so hot,” they muttered outside the doors and even in the halls, “how is he real?”

Your glasses were a little too large for your face- they kept sliding down, forcing you to push them up. The office was a dream come true, but you couldn’t help feeling intimidated. Wen Junhui was a famous model, practically the newest industry legend, and you had gotten the job managing things in his office. You’d probably hardly see the man himself in person, but the starstruck feeling persisted regardless. It felt odd to be an invisible player for such a public figure, a fixture of awe.

Qualified for the job as you were, you felt out of place, frankly. You weren’t sure of the office dress code, opting for something off the plainer end of your wardrobe just to blend in, you hadn’t had time for much makeup, and your hair sure wasn’t anything spectacular that day either. Everyone you passed by, models and photographers and makeup artists, barely spared you glances.

At least you’d be paid well and have a great line on your résumé. You enjoyed keeping things organized and that was what the model known simply as Jun needed. His life was organized chaos, and you were to be the former half of the phrase.

Footsteps echoed behind you as you made for the glass door of your office. “Oh, excuse me,” you said, stepping forward and holding the door open. As you turned, you were met with the stunning smile of a man in a suit.

“Thank you so much, ma’am. Oh, say, you must be the one who’s here to help me out.” Jun himself stood before you, expression bright. The words may have seemed condescending coming from someone else’s mouth, but his whole affect was so genuine the thought of him judging you didn’t even cross your mind.

Precious little did cross your mind beneath the sheer starstrike of meeting the very man who received such buzz behind his back, such almost mystery at his poise and looks. Several heartbeats passed before you even replied at all.

“Yes, I am. My name is-”

“Wait!” He stopped you eagerly, smile growing wider. “I want to make sure I remember correctly! (y/n), right?”

“Yep,” you stuttered a bit, clutching your folder to your chest, “yep, that’s me.”

“I hope you can enjoy working here. If you need anything, please tell me.”

“That’s what I should be telling you!” You burst out before you could stop yourself.

Luckily for your career, your new coworker chuckled at that. “I like to think both of us can help each other,” he replied warmly, finally disappearing through the door you held open, making sure it didn’t hit you as you followed.

~

This was going to be a great job, you could tell. Respect levels varied among who you worked with, one set of higher-ups dismissively asking you to bring coffee for an eight person meeting like you weren’t Jun’s personal assistant, just a lowly receptionist or intern, but respect came where it mattered.

Placing the last to-go cup in the mostly-flat quadrant carrier, you checked off the last of the coffees and teas ordered by the directors, agents, and models. Sighing, you pocketed the used list, sliding your hand underneath the one carrier and hoping you wouldn’t spill anything while your hands were full. It wasn’t that you minded grabbing coffee, it was more the way they asked, AKA demanded. They didn’t see you at the same level as the other assistants or even secretaries, whether that was because you were new, a young woman, or simply less chic. Had the man even uttered a ‘please’ you would have felt different.

“Hey, that’s a lot. You shouldn’t even be doing this.”

Turning, you saw Jun at your back, concern etched across his handsome face.

“I- I don’t mind,” you stammered, attempting to lift both carriers like waiter’s trays.

“Oh, no no no, let me get one, please.” Sliding his hand beneath yours, the model deftly plucked four of the drinks from your hand. “That guy was so rude, if he wasn’t a huge investor I would have punched him. You don’t even work for him. You must be so much kinder than me,” he chuckled as you set back off down the hallway.

You flushed. “Well, like I said, I don’t mind, and I’m so new here, so-”

“I get it,” he nodded, tone calming, “I’ll mention it to them. Of course you don’t want to start any fights! You know our software like the back of your hand, though, and even your way around a camera. All those guys know is money signs. Don’t let them sell you short.”

“Ok,” you nodded shakily as the doorway approached, both of you disappearing back into the meeting room with its long, imposing table.

How did you get so lucky? The little smiley faces your…boss? Colleague? Jun wasn’t really your supervisor, come to think of it…sent you in all his emails and the stuffed cat on his desk named Jun Junior he waved you off with had had you smiling, but the way he took those coffees, the way he immediately told the suited big-wig you were a tech whiz, and you were there for him, not just some intern, had your heart fluttering.

~

Coffee runs you could handle, but petty high-school insults? Everyone was too old for that. You had earned your way into an amazing opportunity, taken too much care into your work to be pushed around by people talking about your looks behind your back. Especially when the man you worked with had such a big heart.

The same people who wondered if Jun could be real wondered how someone with your appearance could work so closely with him.

“She should be ashamed coming to a place like this looking so plain.”

“I know. Doesn’t she know she works for a modeling agency, not some temp desk?”

“They must have done a blind interview, otherwise they would have known she doesn’t match our image at all. I wonder what Mr. Wen thinks.”

“Not much, I bet.”

“What a shame. Well, she’s a secretary for sure,” the first woman flipped her ponytail off her sleek, purple-silk-clad shoulder as she gave a small shrug.

At the time, you said nothing, passing by as if their words rolled over muffed ears. Verbal spats would solve nothing but the question of if you would stoop down to their level, and just like with the coffee there would be no falling for that on your first day at work. Day one in that beautiful white-tiled building with all its glass panels you apparently looked like only belonged in as some sort of substitute.

Proving them wrong silently, though? Not a qualm in the world.

You’d scheduled a haircut for that night after work, so the moment you said your good nights to the remaining few staff and cleaners heading out with you it was straight to the salon. Barbed words spurred you on to take the risk on the chair, daring the fresh hairstyle you’d considered off and on the last few times.

It looked amazing. Shaking your hair out with satisfaction, you gave one more glance into your mirror at home before pulling open your closet doors.

~

Day Two of your job. That morning, you’d opted for your nicest business-casual dress and done your favorite hair and makeup look, feeling more ready than ever to step out of that elevator.

And sure enough, when you did, you were met with whispers beneath doorway sheens, eyebrows raised beneath Prada glasses. Half of you wanted to tell those people off, speak into their stares exactly why they should be ashamed at treating you like a different person for conforming to the speech of their shallow hearts. The other half, though? It had your shoulders raising a bit with pride at turning heads.

Reflection reaching for the long silver handle of your translucent office door, you stepped in with a newly burning passion for your day’s work, starting it with the difficult call you’d been putting off, one you knew would require a bit of negotiation.

You argued perfectly for the best shoot conditions Jun could have, and when you tapped into his office he did an almost childish double-take that had you flushing.

“Wow,” he breathed, sitting up straighter, “uh, hi. What did you need?”

~

This was one stubborn tripod. Whoever had previously set it up, they’d locked the legs so tight it took every muscle in your hands to pry the thin solid cylinders apart. Fingers working between them, you finally unlatched the last hold and pulled the trio back into their triangular state, glasses sliding down your nose at your downward stance.

“All right, I can take the camera now.”

At your word the photographer hooked up his device and you carefully placed it in its spot just outside the makeshift set.

A few weeks had passed since that tentative first few days, time to earn some respect for practically rewriting the whole agency office’s scheduling program and undeniably increasing efficiency. Despite that, though, your heart was falling more and more into the field, jobs that had you cramming supplies into Jun’s company car and sliding into the backseat with him for a quick debrief before assisting tech. While the model himself got his makeup done, you learned more and more of what models went through and even tips the photographers gave them nine out of ten times they stood before the camera: ways to turn, flattering poses, all the fake behaviors to play at eating or using products, even the generic photoshoot smile Jun had taught you through his jokes in the car and called you a natural at. Even the ruder office-mates had cause to shut up seeing you do more physical work they didn't want to do anyway.

"Where is the man of the hour, anyway?" The jovial photographer asked, hands upon paisley-belted waist.

"Probably getting his makeup finished," you giggled, leaning against the drink table behind the scenes.

"Well, I'm sure he looks great. Go get him out here- he won't listen to anyone but you,” the man teased, waving you forward with a smile.

You couldn’t help but wonder what the man meant as you shuffled off, straightening the blouse you’d chosen to balance comfort and style. It was fun in its own right, thinking of those things, even if it was exhausting.

Verity of the photographer’s words or not, Jun did sit right up at your call. You shared what he said about the model looking great, summoning one of the bright laughs you loved from his lips. He tilted his head like a cat, lashes fluttering a bit.

“What do you think?”

Your body had already half-turned to leave the brightly lit bustle of artists and their dusty craft as he spoke. “I beg your pardon?”

“Do you think I look good, (y/n)?” It was almost startling the way breathed the question, fixing you with that intensely inquisitive stare. Jun meant it, truly cared what you thought, hoped he measured up. People spoke of him like he was something beyond humanity, but he was more human than so many of the people you met, so down to earth.

Breath hitching as you pushed up your glasses and took in the way his dark brown hair fell lightly tousled onto his brow, the way the stylist had unbuttoned just one less than usual of his shirt’s fastenings, the way the makeup artists had subtly brightened his lips, and all you could do was nod.

“Then I am ready,” he responded, smile widening as he followed you to the set and posed for the camera more magnificently than you’d seen yet.

~

The next day, you arrived to work strangely anxious. Leaving early had given you the opportunity to grab a little something extra; clutching the bag, you made to knock on Jun’s office door, but he beat you to it, stepping out right as you raised your hand.

“Oh, (y/n), perfect! Got a little something for you here.” In his outstretched hand was a to-go cup from the café you frequented.

A surreptitious turn of the cup proved it your usual order. You smiled sheepishly. “Thanks, I really need the caffeine this morning. I did not sleep well last night, you can probably tell.”

Smile staying put, Jun gave a little shake of his head. “Your heart still shines as bright as ever.”

As if those words hadn’t shot an arrow straight through your palpitating heart, you just glanced down at the bag in your hand. “Well, I was hoping to shine some light on your morning. I got you something too!”

“Is that…?” Lighting up, he peeled the white paper open and grinned like it was Christmas. “Muffins! We’re the best, aren’t we, (y/n)?”

At that, all you could do was laugh with him and remind him you guys had a call at ten.

~

This shoot was a two-person. Jun and a female model were posing together to show the men’s and women’s collection of a latest designer drop. This photographer was a bit less forgiving than the kind, fashionable gentleman you’d enjoyed setting up with last time. By that point, you were well used to business types. At least this guy didn’t demand you a starbucks run or a sandwich or anything.

Most of his ire was directed toward the poor beauty, demanding a more complicated pose of her than of Jun. You didn’t even want to think about why, just shook your head in sympathy as he criticized the way she bent. Jun was going to stand upright, one hand leaned casually on a little white column as he looked halfway into the camera, while she had to fold her arms across it practically bent at a ninety-degree angle. You’d seen that pose given to female models before, pulled it a few times just to imagine the uncomfortable tension at the base of the spine the women had to go through.

That, likely, was the problem. If you rolled your hips wrong, it could hurt, not to mention looking that much less natural. Rocking the boat was the last thing you wanted to do, but hearing the photographer criticize the woman’s inability to take the pose well just got to you, bringing you right back to your first days when everyone thought the new assistant beneath them. You’d proved them wrong, now it was this man’s turn.

“I think what he means to say,” you began, keeping your voice just timid and kind enough to dull the pointed inflection of your words, “is that it’s ok to keep your hips relaxed, like this.”

Jun stepped from his side of the podium, proudly waving you forward. Your eyes fell from his as you, faintly smiling, bent onto the short, gaudy column that was their set dressing. Keeping yourself relaxed was pretty easy- the temptation to stick out more simply wasn’t there for you. Sticking anything out, standing out, wasn’t something you craved on the daily.

But sometimes it felt good. “Yes! Exactly like that! She knows the pose,” the photographer half-praised, half-complained, tugging on his tie.

“Let her do it, then,” Jun suddenly spoke up.

“What?” The photographer goggled at him.

“Let her do it with us. She’s seen plenty of what we do. We all know I can’t go to a shoot without her. Why not let her get on the other side of the camera?”

The older man’s dark eyes slid your way, then drifted just as quickly back to Jun. “She’s not exactly a model.”

“You just said she knew the pose better than the pro,” he replied with crossed arms.

“She doesn’t have the look that fits our concept,” the photographer hissed, setting his camera down, “I mean, some people get hired to stand in front of a camera and some go behind it. There’s a vision for this brand, you understand.”

The words choked you a little, strangling your chest a little tighter than teenage-level barbs. In this man’s eyes, no one would believe you passed as part of the beauty industry. Such views were a given the way he spoke them- nobody would ever believe someone who looked like you would make it on a front page or an instagram post. You'd never be on a model's level, just the girl who worked for them. Perhaps that was what bothered you most- everyone around you dooming you to a lower plane of existence than the kind, handsome joy of a man you worked for with one look, one judgement.

“I do understand,” Jun replied, stripping the designer jacket off his chest and handing it to the stylist waiting at the camera, “and that’s something you’ll never have Wen Junhui’s support on. Find someone else to do the shoot.”

Never had Jun’s voice, always so soft and sweet and comforting, hardened like that. The sound of it had your back stiffening, almost startled out of the painful jolt to your chest and falling of your gaze. His tone was low, icy, and firm as he stepped calmly toward the illuminated exit of the studio hanging and oozing pale red light over the pristine white door. Your head swiveled back and forth between the exit and the studio, its pale blue background almost entirely empty.

"But- But-"

Protests, weak and incredulous, fell from your lips, but Jun shook his head, a small smile returning when he met your eyes again. "I'll take the hit on the client. The agency heads will understand when I'm done with them. We know what to say." He winked, and your shaky heart fluttered again.

"I know you didn't ask to model or anything," he continued, "and maybe you wouldn't have wanted to do it. But what that guy said? It made me mad. I didn't even know wrong words could make me feel angry like this until I heard what he said. This isn't the way I wanted to tell you this at all, I wanted to wait until we were both in my office and I had the courage to get you flowers or buy your lunch on break but you usually bring it...er, anyway, (y/n), you're the most beautiful girl in the world. Prettier than any model or idol they have on those cameras. Know why? Your beauty is more than skin-deep. It wasn't made, it just is. No need to try and make yourself up for it. You endure so many harsh words and still act kind. You're smart, writing programs hardly anyone else in the agency knows a line of. The fact that you have a gorgeous smile, too, just makes you an all-kill."

Jun...thought that highly of you? Tears welled up briefly in your eyes at the balm of his words over the photographer's, disappearing smoothly and warmly back with a blink as your eyes fixed on his beautiful brown gaze. One thing about your model associate, you knew, was that he never lied. Never said anything he didn't mean. Perhaps his resignation shouldn't have surprised you, but as you disappeared through the swinging exit door, it hardly occurred to you in favor of his last sentence repeating in your mind.

"I don't know what to say," you replied, sure your smile looked as dreamy as you felt, but nothing short of a meteor would have stopped that.

Jun took your hand in his, running a thumb across the back of it so softly you thought you might melt. "Say you like me, too. Well, only if you do, you know..."

"I know," you nodded, "because I do. Everyone always talks about you like some mysterious figure, like you can't be human just because you're so handsome, but they don't see your true beauty, either. Jun, you're truly one of the sweetest people I've ever met, and it's because of you I feel so comfortable and respected in my job. You make my day with how excited you get over muffins and let me talk to Jun Junior. Every day has something to be happy about, but you always know how to get down to business when you need to. I admire that. I wish everyone could see that, not just how hot you are."

His eyes bugged. "You think I'm hot?"

"Well," you flushed, frozen on the sidewalk at his side, "stealing their words. But I guess my secret's out? Or maybe the real secret is how we're both all-kills."

Jun giggled with you at that, looking a bit flushed himself as he leaned down, pressing a kiss to the back of your hand. "It's like I said, (y/n). We're the best. Please let me buy you lunch one of these days. I'll take your picture and prove just how beautiful you are, inside and out."