#fatalistic mode

[spnwin-reader]

This morning, I’m thinking about the Winchester “pushiness” of “what’s next?” Despite chafing against his mom’s question, John then turns around and asks Mary the same thing. What’s next for her?

It is a duality for Mary: she feels pressured, spooked even. But also… warily hopeful. She wants to borrow some of John's hope, actually.

Mary tries to explain to him that she’s just trying to stay alive. Her hunting past feels like predetermination. “Campbell duty and heroics,” maybe.

Overall, John is maybe sometimes too focused on The Future, on What Comes After. We will see that many in his family search for “noble” purpose through work/industriousness. He is practically begging anyone to take his hand and go towards a future with him.

///

On the positive side, this can be a very positive trait! Patience, persistence... not giving up.

(14x02)

[shallowseeker]

when jack said "can you tell them i'm sorry" about the angels being angry i fell in love with him as a character. he's just a little guy!!!

Imagine. You're a new life and one of your earlier emotions? Being sorry.

After hearing angelic voices, perhaps he's hearing their anger, their panic... and he's sorry for being born. Or perhaps he's just sorry for hurting the people who'd been kind to him, for the people caught up in his out-of-control power.

//

//

///

[Sam is also visibly relieved, as Jack sits on the cot opposite him and folds his legs up criss cross applesauce style] JACK: I'm sorry. SAM (confused): What? JACK: Will you tell them that I'm sorry? SAM: Yeah. Sure. Of course. (long pause) 13x01

///

Then Jack gets stabbed and:

...is confused, then horrified.

After all, the other person who got stabbed this episode?

Not exactly fine.

Jack looks on as Sheriff Barker rushes Clark out of the building, Clark suffering from a severe stab wound from the exact same kind of weapon.

Jack notices.

Notices how different he and Clark are.

///

So in 13x02, he's still struggling with that blossoming realization, that horror:

Jack already knows:

This appeal is for a reassurance that can't be given...

Something about godforsaken monsters and their little monsters. It's so painful.

But also so reminiscent of another moment of unsettling, possibly evil, intrinsic invulnerability:

There's something so piercing about this off-key parallel.

My brother thinks you can* be saved & You don't believe that // You don't think you deserve to be saved

[musical-chick-13]

Idk, I just...really hate having a brain/body that won't work. The Condition™ is so bad that I literally cannot focus on ANYTHING, even things that mean a lot to me. I can't string sentences together, doing any kind of standing physical activity for longer than 15 minutes will wipe me out for the rest of the day, and I am SO. TIRED. Sleep doesn't help. Caffeine doesn't help. Meds don't help. All of my labs keep coming back in range, and I just don't understand what's happening. What do I need to do.

[nalyra-dreaming]

re: Armand forgetting Florence's name, I agree with what you said, and also think the writers were hinting that Armand isn't the ultra-attentive lover he pretends to be. Like Assad said, Armand sees Louis as a "vessel", his love is fundamentally selfish and he's far more focused on controlling Louis than connecting with him on a real level or understanding him to his core.

I'm not trying to malign Armand here - imho he's a deeply damaged person whose desperation for control is rooted in years of trauma & abuse and is still in "survival mode". Idk if he even realizes how fucked up he is, or that he's setting himself up for rejection & unhappiness by stifling their love before it can grow. But yeah, he def approaches Louis like a problem to be solved rather than a person to be loved or valued in his entirety. I feel like we were never meant to take his lovelorn simp performance totally at face value lol.

Yes, but also...

We have to remember that Armand is old. And he spent centuries of that being brainwashed by a satanic cult. As the coven leader, responsible for solving problems and dealing out punishment.

AND he is a vampire. He simply does not think like Louis, who has been kept more or less "mortal" in his behavior by Lestat (who did not want a coven, but a family).

To Armand Louis' mortal mother must seem as distant as his own, and in the headspace he is in in Paris, she must have seemed inconsequential and long gone. Dust on the floor. That plays into why he does not (care to) remember her name, why he is so fatalistic about Claudia's fate, why he clings to the things he has - namely the coven and Louis' love, at least to an extent - with such a grip that he tears it all apart at the end.

Yes, he is very damaged, by fate, time and circumstance. He is also not human. And especially with the older ones, that does show in the chronicles, and I do think it shows in his characterization here.

[bladekindeyewear]

[S] 8r8k artist/writer commentary part 2

(Part 1 link) Part 2 of the commentary for the flash just came out on Patreon! I'm reading through for anything especially clarifying or plot-relevant under the cut, skipping most of the fluff and not-specifically-understanding-relevant stuff as usual so Patreon subscribers can enjoy it.

Hopefully we get a hint of clarification on some things like exactly what "Hell Tier" is and how it differs (or doesn't!) from Ultimate Self ascension, and why Karkat thanked her for the "obnoxious laser assist", unless he was thanking Jake to the side when he said that...

Alright, starting my skim through this for useful details... a bit more about the super-detailed Sollux bit, they mention again that he doesn't have his teeth, but specifically also that "he does indeed have both eyeballs, they're just black". (And still blind I'd assume.) Interesting.

OH, THIS I didn't catch: The flash isn't meant to take place over a short period of time, but rather from sunset through NIGHT (the second half of the flash, when Jake rises up, Rose points at her forehead and Vriska does her thing) up to the EDGE of daybreak at the very end.

Kim: We’ve finally reached THE NIGHT! As I’ve emphasized in the last few of our artist commentaries, the gradual change of time and when the events in these past few updates have occurred have very deliberate symbolism to it. Light and shadow played a VERY important role during this flash, and we knew very specifically it had to be night time for the climax of 8r8k. If you think about it, it’s kinda crazy that they’ve been fighting like this for HOURS. Even until daybreak… At the very end of the flash, you can actually see the sun rising JUST a bit over the horizon too…

We have Jake rising up, and the wings, and in a sense Tavvy seeing his father as a more literal God as they say he "has probably always thought"? Good characterization to keep in mind.

Oh, the Rose pointing at her forehead for the bullet is an explicit reference to a famous scene/panel from the manga "MONSTER", I wouldn't have noticed that. A badass if fatalistic shot as a culmination of her "cold" mindstate leading up to this moment, they say. To also quote one of them, "Oh Rose…what are you doing man.".

(Horses and the intro to the final Vriska self-reuniting scene, let's see... I wonder if they'll mention some classpect stuff...)

[KIM:] (Vriska)’s request for Vriska to accept (her)self wholly had been tormenting her for YEARS, literally a looming shadow over her… haunting her… I wanted the irony to be palpable that even though Vriska, clearly an adult by now, was posed with what would objectively be such a simple task still made her feel so small in the face of it even beside her younger self.

The shot of her sadly looking back at her message to Terezi from John's device...

Floral: It was early on decided that Terezi was the bridge between these two Vriska’s, and that despite what Vriska put (Vriska) through or her constant rejection, (Vriska) being able to still empathize her other self was a prime example of what Vriska could be. It’s not about loving someone more than you hate yourself but something crazier and more complicated. I love Vriska.

They note an intentional and almost hilarious contrast between how the adult Vriska is drawn in detail and the smaller (Vriska) is drawn in her old MSPA Hero Mode style... (Vriska) being scared and backing away because of all the bullying Vriska mixed in to the rest of the (four-ish!!) years she's been stuck revisiting her and failing...

((Including shooting at her with a gun, that was still a crazy thing to mix in I don't know what the fuck was up with that, lol. Part of my mind still can't help but distantly wonder if that was a reference to my other username but, naaah.))

The final hug moment "like an older sister reconciling with their younger sibling", they're talking about how showing the resolution in this action showed the "acceptance" more than any words could so it made sense to show it in this form here, in the flash, instead of earlier...

Davepeta understandably the happiest about this development among her supporters, and a bit of mention of:

Miles: In many ways the fate of a sprite is to be an agent of someone else’s journey, but 8 years in silent hill is vicious work.

Yup, yup...

Then Vriska is alone and surprised to have "finally accepted herself as a whole"...

Alright, seems we're moving out of the Plot Point and back to the action.

"[Floral:] Her cheshire grin as she totally fucks up Rose’s plan." I definitely enjoyed that, yeah.

They say they wanted it to "mirror Terezi's hand as all of Meat was flashing by", but I guess I still don't get the full significance of their decision to have that huge Meat flashback just before the moment happened... partially to signal Ultimate Vriska's awareness of the entirety of the situation (Light) upon her ascension here if I had to guess, and another excuse to show Terezi as the emotional bridge? They don't quite say here.

Ah, they "decided that the meteor would explode" at that moment in the flash, and they show the blue light blast behind her; I wonder if the laser was let through or if the destruction was an explosion from within as Vriska came out and rescued the others? Was the meteor exploding UPWARD with her ascendant emergence the "obnoxious laser assist"?

Kim: AND HERE SHE IS IN ALL HER GLORY…. HELL TIER VRISKA!!! [...snipping some text...] It’s everything about her, but AMPED UP!!!

I suppose they're mostly focusing on their design choices and not spoiling us on details or "why"s (yet)?

OH WAIT THEY DO TELL US SOMETHING HERE IN A BIT:

Now, you may have been wondering, “what the haell is all the hubbub with this ‘HELL TIER’ nonsense I keep hearing about?” You can actually thank that one for being another Andrew Hussie original! If you’re a hardcore Beyond Canon fan, some of you may remember that it was mentioned Andrew had two mandates for Homestuck’s sequel that HAD to stay from his outline. One, being Yiffany’s character AND……. lo and behold, TWO is Hell Tier Vriska! Her concept and design was one of the first few things we as a team worked on together when this project started up again. While the core of her concept has essentially stayed the same, with our team’s reboot, the direction and purpose of it is what mostly changed. Fun fact, Andrew’s original design notes for her in the outline said she would have red hair, blue skin, and look like an insanely demonic anime pirate lady. Do what you will with that information LOL.

THIS is especially interesting and deserved being quoted in full, my bolding added for anyone curious at some of the differences between Andrew's original outline, Homestuck^2, and the intentionally-loosened-from-his-outline-more Beyond Canon continuation. Because of the intentional differences in tack it sounds like they took in introducing her -- and let me tell you, everything they did with The Plot Point and the 8-year psychology session was BRILLIANT to me and I loved it, personally -- it's difficult to tell what differences there might have been between this and the version Andrew originally had in mind in terms of plot purpose and characterization beyond most likely always being meant to serve as the gateway to get the Omega Kids into Canon, I'd bet. For all we know it could have been more of a Grimbark-like transformation embodying the overembracing of a Thief of Light instead of an ascension from true balance like we saw, but I expect we won't get any answers on differences THAT big between the "outline" and the final plot for a long time, until after the plot is over most likely.

Kim: What we also wanted to emphasize is that this form isn’t exactly like a new state of being like the usual God Tiers, it’s more like a power-up that Vriska has unlocked!

This ALSO doesn't tell us quite where this power came from-- if this is the natural true power of a Thief of Light she's finally tapping into, if this is something "taken" from the nature of The Plot Point's Hell, and/or if this is her Ultimate Self. We simply don't know yet, and they're not telling us just yet!

Alright they're moving on... yep, they gave the "prior Bec Noir"(?) version of Jack an ending by having him serve Jane in that mech and be killed... (I forget, in those hard-to-find snapchats wasn't it Mech Noir and the Felt followers that Jane captured? Eh, this is a detail I feel like I don't care enough to properly reconcile, oddly enough... Although the moon WAS blown apart in this flash so that Jane kidnap snapchat DID happen, was that mecha-Jack actually the former Bec Noir or did they mis-state here? Was it even mecha-Jack? If so then he'd been restored from Mecha status by Jane's Life powers then, which makes some sense. Maybe they're calling him "prior Bec Noir" because of the Bec-Noir-like mecha "BecMech… (Mech Noir?)" he was piloting, so combining them in symbolism. Eh I don't care too much.)

From her in front of the Moon-- I still want to know if she stole Light from the moon like it looked?

Floral: I helped animate this part too and god, when we saw it all together, it was amazing. Vriska fully harnessing her light powers to deliver the most relevant strike the Candyverse has ever seen.

--I'm still unclear if how I saw it is what really happened, I'd have appreciated some clarification. Maybe it was just a dramatic pose and stealing of Jane Crocker's continued relevance and power before her strike. They don't explain the flaming infinity on the ground either or what it accomplished beyond looking awesome.

They mention some other inspirations for Vriska's final blow and the rest of the assault you can read on Patreon that don't have specific plot-relevance that I'd cover, there's plenty of that...

Oh pff... they intended Jane to survive this flash, but Just-A-Head-Jane was apparently an on-the-spot idea here that someone tossed in and they laughed about it but eventually took it seriously and followed through with it, and I'm so glad they did, it's absolutely hilarious and emphasizes Jane's full-strength logic-defying Maid of Life powers and I love it:

Spicyyeti: the talking head was outside the bounds of the flash but i suggested it. and everyone kept saying “why not?” jokingly until they started saying “why not.” seriously. think reanimator, or haunted mansion 2003, or lollipop chainsaw, but especially susie summer killer7……

Miles: That call was hilarious because I think the transition from joke to serious was maybe less than a minute.  Literally as soon as we started talking about it I went into the doc for the next update and replaced every dialogue instance of “Jane” with “Jane’s head” and just kept laughing and laughing; it changed basically nothing about how the update needed to be written but an already funny gag was taken to crazier and more hilarious heights.  I guess I’ll save the rest of this for the next commentary, but seriously choice suggestion from Carmi, who saved our lives in so many ways on this animation it’d take an entire other commentary to list them all. Floral: It was an amazing idea and EXACTLY what the flash needed. And honestly the most Homestuck way to handle the conflict.

I'm in full agreement with them on that, Dullahan Jane is fucking hilarious and the best and a super Homestuck thing to do and I love it.

I suppose that's it for all the bits I find most plot-relevant or interesting for this commentary, but again, if you want more about the juicy art details and less plot-necessary revelations, feel free to chip in to Homestuck's Patreon or wait the 61 days for it to become public!

[evil-robot-cat]

Reeve "The Promised Land Doesn't Exist" Tuesti literally put Cait Sith in sleep mode rather than deal with the home of planetology, Cosmo Canyon.

When someone dragged Cait Sith over to their sacred bonfire, he called them a bunch of fatalist idiots before he realized he was breaking character and went back to saying cute, meaningless things.

It's always been a headcanon of mine that Reeve is whatever their planet's version of an atheist is, but to see it... 🤭😆

[grievous-writes]

"Mimic" - Part One - Ramattra x Reader

Welp, I think this one is gonna be more then a one shot XD

You were one of the most single-handedly annoying Humans Ramattra had to endure, and given all of Humanity was on his knives’ edge, that was saying something. He had his mission, his war, his duty to all Omnic kind, and you as a Talon agent were making this muddled - A Human who was an ally, even if it was hesitantly so. 

Those who worked with the organization were a colorful bunch, some fatalistic and grim, and then others were like you with your flashy attitude and manic personality. Sombra and you were in that same vein, snarky and short, but you were different enough to stand out from the hacker by coming to Ramattra on your downtime. Where Sombra’s RnR was spent on her various data collections and pulling threads behind a monitor, you spent your time pestering the Omnic leader.

Your particular flavor of pestering Ramattra was your vocal mimicry, hence your code name “Mimic”. You loved to use his voice against him.

Ramatraa read your file, he knew it was a Blackwatch raid on your small town that caused you to loathe the sham that was Overwatch, and you had to survive a traumatic childhood by mimicking everything around you. You could be disguised as anything, from a dog limping down the street to a trash bin dumped over on the side of the road, and through this unique skill you would steal food for other orphaned kids in your town … or you’d pilfer heavy munitions for rebel cells. You were a survivor, durable and capable, and slightly insane. You had to be if you kept pestering him so often. 

You caught him several times when he was leaving meetings with the other Talon top-brass, appointed his escort to and from his ship, and would poke and poke and poke:

“So, got any plans to make people suffer as you have suffered today?” You asked with half of your voice being your own, and the other more embolden part being his tone repeated back to him. Uncanny. 

He tried to ignore you, walking onward as you trailed behind; sights set forward to his docked ship. 

“Oh come on, don’t leave me hanging!” Your smile was too wide for his taste.

He growled. “Surely you must have some task other than to bother me, Human.” 

“Oh, ouch, are we back to that sort of name calling, Omnic?” You frowned with a mischievous eye roll. “Come on, give me something to work with besides your broody mode. A laugh, a joke!”

“You are a joke.” Was his quick spitted response, and he felt rather juvenile after letting it out.

“Again, ouch.” You chuckled and he watched from the edge of his vision as your smile faded ever so. “How about this then - When you’re in a better mood, and if you have free time, come find me?”

Ramattra paused in mid step and snapped his head down to look at you. “And why would I seek you out?” 

“Cause I’m charming and fun to be around.” Your smile grew in full force; hands on your hips and head held high.Cocky and confident. 

The Omnic aimed to give another quick retort, a quick bit of his words, but he faltered. That’s what you wanted from him, banter and conversation - You were collecting more of his voice. And for what end? You were using him, just as how he was using you. 

“Enough of you, Mimic.” Ramattra’s tone was deep, level, and it made your stomach churn. His red glowing gaze was intense and you felt your grin falter once more. “Be gone and find your sport elsewhere. I have no interest in mingling with the likes of you.” 

“Likes of me? W-What’s that-?”

“You are an adventitious tool for Talon and nothing more. You are barely subpar above the hacker and sniper, nowhere near important enough to be mentioned by your leaders, and your only real task is playing babysitter to someone who could crush your skull in with a flex of my palm. It is trivial and a token task given to placate someone as desperate as you.” The Omic turned away from you and kept walking to the ramp of his waiting vessel, leaving you in your spot. 

Your feet refused to move and you couldn’t find any words. 

“Keep that in mind when you try to talk to me as if we are equals.” Was Ramattra’s last comment as he ducked out of sight, and you stood frozen as his ship flew away into the early evening’s orange sky. - - -

The last meeting with the Omnic got to the ears of Reaper, with some deck crew tattle-telling on you, and the masked man gave you a mouthful of not so passive threats to back down … and a new assignment that would take you away from Talon’s HQ for sometime. Talon couldn’t risk pissing off Null Sector, not for the amusement of a mid-range agent like yourself.

You were assigned to the ass end of nowhere, at a monitoring station high in the mountains of the western United States, where Talon was piggybacking off official comms channels around the world. You were set in charge of a small team that was meant to monitor air traffic and report anything useful. You were essentially tossed to the side, put in time out, and your skills and true talents left unused for months.

To anyone else, they’d have probably been pissed off and brooding about the new job, but you had been discarded before many times, lonely and forgotten, that this was a walk in the park. You had learned to mimic contentment, to fabricate joy, and masterfully masked your hurt emotions with diligence to your task. This was all first nature to you, with the founding blocks of your skills set by a little kid who had to fake it till they made it. You remembered a time where you had to literally mimic the sound of a dying bunny to lure in a starving cat, a fine meal you caught with your bare hands; just barely above the age of ten. 

You were so alone, so sad, and scared.

In all your bravado and flashy facade, you had thought that maybe Ramattra would understand what it meant to feel alone; given his situation. You couldn’t imagine the weight on his shoulders, his task was unique to him alone, but you could still sympathize. And you dared that maybe, just maybe, you told yourself, if you could make him “smile” there was hope that neither of you would be so lonely.

But alas, he pushed you away. Red tape was laid out and you were officially told to back off.

That didn’t stop you however from using the monitoring station to your own ends.

You had your own hacking subroutines that Sombra didn’t have access to, your own unique flavor of single mimicking, and you easily tapped into Null Sector and Talon communications. You at first used your connection to pinpoint where joint operations were held, then you would figure out who was in command and leading the missions, and eventually you got access to an area’s security system and watched the battles from the comfort of your desk via CCTVs. And unabashedly, you were keen on watching Ramattra work out in the field. 

You watched how dominating Ramattra was on the field, and was fascinated with how precise his attacks were. His defensiveness was calculated, his offense ruthless, and he would annihilate his enemies with efficacy. You couldn’t help but find yourself mimicking his voice and actions in the comfort of your room, playing out fighting along his side and working out in your head how you could aid the Omic in battle. You found yourself roleplaying as well, making fake conversations back and forth with his voice and your own in your throat. Silly things, funny things, a side of Ramattra you were making up in your spare time. 

You imagined him congratulating you on a task well done, complimenting you on your fighting style, and after a few close calls in combat, finally him taking that offer on spending time with you. But in reality, you were talking to yourself, sitting in a barely lit room and dreaming of something that would never come to be. It was pathetic. The solitary time in the mountains was getting to you, and you knew that there was a line between boredom and obsession. 

On the morning you set out to end the little spy network on Ramattra’s missions, you noticed something interesting stirring in the signals codding. The Omnic and a few other Talon agents were set out on a stealth mission to steal a payload out from Overewatch’s nose, and where Sombra was there to hack her way through doors and watch through the building’s cameras, you caught signs of another person’s work doing the same thing you were doing. They were mimicking Sombra’s signal and watching everything she was doing. You watched from a third eye position as Sombra’s attacks were being counter blanched, no doubt by someone in Overwatch, but you couldn’t act - Or else you’d be found out. It was one thing to have a little network insight like you had, and another thing to be found out. 

You could get into real trouble, like the sort that left a bullet in your brain knowing Talon, but as you watched the mission go to shit, as you saw Ramattra’s shield being beaten down again and again, all thoughts for self preservation fell away. 

“Fuck it.” You snarled under your breath and got to work. Your signal turned onto the Overwatch line and began to attack it from the preverbal backdoor in a sparking battle; counter-acting every move it tried to do, by acting as stray code within its own network. You began to cause internal damage into the Overwatch hacker’s routine, mimicking your way in and out of its trappings to have the program destroy its own code.  

The actions caught Sombra’s attention as she was trying to open a door for escape, a weird glare set to her features. “What the-?!”

“Sombra, the door!” Reaper shouted out between shotgun blasts.

“Yeah yeah, I’m getting there - Finally!” She barked back with a sudden smirk as the doors flew open. 

“What took so long?” Widowmaker asked through the commlink, snipping off targets from above.

“Eh, someone in Overwatch was being fancy. But - …” Sombra stood up and dashed through the door; leaving her remark unfinished. The others followed behind her, with Ramattra pulling in the rear as he used his tanky tactics to cover the retreat. 

Reaper hummed and looked to Windowmaker, who had joined the escape from the shadows of a corner and a glare was set to her cold, blue features. 

You watched the interactions going down, heard every word, and both you and Sombra knew that; she knew you were watching and listening now. The hacker was the closest thing you had to a “friend” within Talon, and you knew while she’d try to not toss you under the bus, she might not have the choice; self preservation. But you couldn’t help but feel sudden burning guilt as Reaper and Widowmarker set their eyes onto Sombra. They had their suspicions on her already, you knew that after the failed assassination a few months back, and this could be the perfect opportunity to get her. And by “get”, they could easily kill her if they wanted. 

You couldn’t hide. Your shame of spying on Ramattra was meager compared to seeing Somrba get shot down. Your own self preservation was tossed out the window in a foolish flick of our comm into their joined link. 

“Welcome to Talon Airlines, this is Mimic, and I’ll be your pilot this evening!” Your voice mimicked that of a cherry commercial pilot, masterfull masking your nervousness. The group took a collective halt, stunned for a moment, but none of you had time to talk or argue. “If you could kindly get going? I can’t copy their single for too much longer and Sombra needs to get out of there before the whole compound goes into lock down.” 

Wordlessly the team booked it for the exit, with Sombra leading the way to freedom as you battled on; holding the line. You managed to lock and close doors behind the fleeing troupe, blocking Overwatch agents from getting to them at every turn. You watched as the Talon transporter came flying down to pick up the team, with Ramattra taking a quick glance at a security camera. You watched his crimson glow lingered into the feed, and even as he ducked out of sight and into the safety of the ship, you could feel the red flare burned into your gaze; with no amount of blinking being rid of the speckles in your eyesight. 

You were so fucked.

---

Ramattra stood to one side of the debriefing room, silent and arms crossed, and he was impressed by how you held your ground while Reaper drilled into you. You didn’t flinch, didn’t show emotion. But it couldn’t last; you were only Human, after all. Sombra was brought in as well, the two of you getting an earful, but the masked-man’s ire was majorly on you. Rightfully so, of course. 

You were spying on special operations of some of Talon’s highest ranking agents, and that would've gotten any other soldier a death sentence. Your only saving grace was that you never recovered what you saw. And with Sombra’s input, it was understood your system was nearly flawless. The hacker would have improved things here and there, a few tweaks into your algorithm, but it was enough passive praise to get Reaper to cool down. 

And then there was Doomfist. He was as quiet as Ramattra during the entire interrogation, and only spoke after Reaper had stepped back from your person. Reaper was the gun and Doomfist was the person who could’ve pulled the preverbal trigger.

“Agent Mimic.” Akande began, his baritone voice calm as he was reading over a datapad. Ramattra recognized the passing words on the pad as your personal file, specifically the disciplinary record section. It was a clean slate. 

“Yes, Sir?” You asked at full attention. 

“I shall make this simple.” Doomfist put down the datapad onto a nearby table and began to walk his way around the room, slowly making it to your side. Ramattra was reading your vitals and while you were keeping collected on the outside, your heart rate was steadily rising. “While you have been a loyal soldier to Talon’s cause, and resourceful tool, and have skills I’d hate to see wasted … You’ve made yourself a loose thread, one that has no damaging repercussions if I decide to have you removed. Do you understand?” 

You nodded. “Yes, Sir.”

“Good.” Doomfist’s large gauntlet, with its golden fingers and heavy metal, was delicately laid upon your thinly padded shoulder. He held firm and Ramattra could see in your hardened stare a small spike of emotion breaking through. 

Fear. 

Ramattra could feel his system whirr alive from within his chest cavity, a fan kicking in to dispel a heat he hadn’t felt till that moment. 

“Very good.” Doomsift gave your shoulder a pat before he moved the heavy hand from your body, and your heart race quickened at the lack of his touch. Silent as the night, the tall Human walked back to the head of the table and sat down in a blackened swivel large chair. He sighed and closed his eyes, thinking. 

Reaper shifted his weight from side to side, waiting.

Sombra’s sharp eyes were fixated on Mimic, then onto Ramattra for a brief moment. 

“Ramattra.” Doomfist spoke and his golden gaze shifted to the Omnic. “If Agent Mimic was in your charge, how would you proceed with discipline?” 

Your eyes shifted to him, your fear growing cold in your once bright eyes that teased him with his own voice months ago, and Ramattra’s fan kicked up a level in intensity. You were breaking, as any Human would do in time. There was something undeniably egotistically uplifting at knowing your fate was dependent on his word; something cruel and bitter. Mondatta’s words of compassion echoed within Ramattra’s mind, a failure of a lesson, and it was one he swore never to head again. 

And yet. 

Ramattra uncrossed his arms and reached for his staff, with long metal fingers curling about the weapon’s shaft as he hummed a thought. “Were this left to me? This tool is still usable, even in such a blunder.” 

Your eyes never moved off Ramattra as he continued. “Agent Sombra has given her account on how Mimic’s network was undetectable, to herself and to Overwatch until the big reveal. With some reworking, and with proper guidance, this tool can be repurposed.”

Doomfist hummed deeply. “To be repurposed, a novel idea. And if I were to offer Mimic into your service?” 

The Omnic didn’t trust Doomfist as far as he could throw him. This was a trick. “I would decline.”

“I see.” Doomfist sighed. The tone was set and Mimic’s fate was sealed.

Unless Ramattra acted quickly. But did he want to? It was no secret you were using your network to watch him, an unspoken thing said in the report and after a quick dissection of your data. Why were you watching him? What did you want? Were you seeking the thrill of an obtuse fetish? Trying to gather information on Ramattra that could bring him down? Were you secretly working on the derivative of Talon? There were too many questions.

And thankfully for you, Ramattra wanted answers. 

“However,” Ramatta took a step forward, using some of his massive form to block you from Doomfist’s gaze. Your heart was accelerating at every passing second and there was a mild thrill for Ramattra in your panic. “If Mimic was to choose to transfer to my retinue, I would see this repurposing done. Personally.” 

“You believe they have a choice?” Doomfist raised a singular handsome brow. 

“I do. They can either accept the transfer,” Ramattra and everyone turned their attention to you, and he watched as you swallowed hard. “Or they die. There is no use in vague threats over their life now. They understand … don’t you, Agent Mimic?”

Your throat was so dry that it burned like a sunburn. You rolled your tongue behind closed teeth, trying to find some saliva for reprieve, but there was none. There was only one answer you could give. 

---

And that is how you ended up as the only Human in service of Null Sector, a Talon lesion for Ramattra’s personal use; half hacker and half confidant. Ramattra used your mimicry to every advantage, both in the physical sense and in data collection. You were given quarters deep within the recesses of his primary base, where the sun barely showed and work was grueling. But you were at least alive. You would adapt to your new life (for however long it lasted), as you had so long ago as a child. You swore to yourself to thrive, to make yourself useful, and to survive no matter what suffering the world would toss upon you. 

And of course, you wouldn’t let your flare fade away, not all the way at least. You just had to go about it differently then you had before. The first rule change was to not piss off Ramattra. The second was to not get caught.

So when you felt the need to speak to yourself, you did so in your room. You couldn’t hold back those ticks for sassy conversation. Using his voice, however meager and in private, provided some aspect that you still had free will in your new life. 

“Did you think me forgiving?” You asked yourself in Ramattra’s voice. 

“No, Sir.” You responded with a smile. “I think you are a dick.” 

“You dare?!” Ramatra’’s voice scoffed in your throat. “You’ll pay for that, little one.” 

“Oh, little one~? Don’t make a promise you can’t keep …” You blinked at that and felt your face flush. That came out of nowhere, and it was extremely unhealthy. Creepy and gross, even. You cleared your throat and reached for a cup of water, sipped it to soothe the ache from copying Ramattra’s deeper voice. 

“I’m fucking weird.” You chuckled at yourself nervously and got back to work, typing away at a report.

Meanwhile, from across the base, a solitary Omnic was in his workshop with an array of monitors before him. 

Ramattra knew your first task when setting up your room would be to weed out any listening devices and cameras, all which you found with ease … save one. But it’s location he kept to himself, for now.

You weren’t the only one who was capable of mimicking.

[mercless]

🗡 yap hour ive been quiet (not yapping about it here) but its about my ideas for talons story progression and demons and how everything eventually falls into place just for me (i twist everything to be good for me)

but my thought process for talons 'story progression' ever since the kat comic was that they either have to figure out their own life without marcus around (boo thats character growth), or sink even deeper into being 'the blade's shadow' as their purpose in life/being the true heir by following his teaching better than kat etc. and vowing to avenge marcus. as much as they would love to kill the grand general they are also sadly very fatalistic and might aim instead to 'expose' swain as being a monster/not human to incur change into happening or something. so learning about demons, what and how swain has been up to, etc.

and this has been what ive thought about for a while now, and with all of this atakhan lore, and the leblanc update dropping this year? i have been quietly feasting. plotting scheming etc.

le blanc's line for talon now IN GAME supports my thinking too.

"The Du Couteau name is worthless, - aim higher."

which is very fun and pointed for so many reasons and i think leblanc has many, many ways to try and convince talon to work with or for her because she has a lot of answer they seek but being missing-dad mode talon will point the blame at anyone and everyone for him dying - including the black rose for not having his deal with them be enough to kill swain.

i also want to explore talon Actually learning about demons and those crazy enough to actually hunt them because talon has only ever really 'hunted' humans before this is drastically different fields and i like imagining the different shenanigans this can create. learning more and more about demons and just Seeing atakhan is so fun as well.

[doomieshot]

Wolves, like all animals, are territorial and he wasn't just the dreadwolf, he was a god, which makes it worse. That's why when no one was watching and only after he had seen her drink from the well, he decided to consume himself in rage and jealousy in the privacy of Skyhold's underground library. No one was passing by, it was the perfect place to have a tantrum and he could growl and fester in hysteria as much as he wanted, just like a spoiled toddler denied a piece of candy.

You see, look at HIS Lavellan, at the beck and call of HIS Mythal and the fact that the love of his life was in the service of another god, corroded him like a spider's venom corrodes its victim from the inside before devouring it.

He didn't want Lavellan to serve another god, in general he didn't want his beautiful girl to be a slave to begin with, that's why he erased the damned vallaslin, or was it jealousy that it was one representative of Mythal? He was sure it could be worse, much worse He would have ripped her face off if it had been one of Elgar'nan.

Oh, so that's how that idiot Elgar'nan felt when he noticed how close his wife was to the damn fearsome wolf... Was this some kind of Karma? Maybe, and probably deserved it. A part of him, the most primal and savage, the wolf howling inside him, just wanted to pounce on his glorious Lavellan, bite her throat and not let go until he had consumed her entirely and made her his... A vision too dramatic, grim and fatalistic, on the other hand, Solas, the wise and talented apostate, wanted to take her gently, bathe her in kisses and flowers and frame her in a mural as if she were his personal Andraste.

He wanted so much to just take her and that's why he couldn't see her, not now, because his legs would tremble and he would fall to his knees, a pathetic spectacle for someone so proud, oh for heaven's sake but fate is cruel and it was only enough to hear her voice in the corridor for him to start to feel bad. Should he scold her for having drunk from an ancient and sacred water, to end up in the lap of the servitude of a goddess? Or perhaps he should explode in jealousy?

He had to think fast because she couldn't search for him forever and he couldn't hide all his life, eventually, the hare would find the wolf... And the wolf would probably end up sinking his fangs into her.

(The "personal Andraste" is indeed a reference to Depeche Mode's Personal Jesus. Yes I'm grim and fatalistic)

[talonabraxas]

The Sun moves into "serious-minded" report:

This week we have the Sun entering "serious-minded" Capricorn on Thursday, December 21st. On the same day we have the (winter solstice), the official beginning of winter. On Friday, December 22nd, we have a (Mercury Cazimi in Capricorn), where the Sun in Capricorn will conjunct Mercury in Capricorn. This excellent transit to reset, restart a specific cycle. It is the (heart of the Sun) taking place at 12:50 PM, CST. Look for messages, increased synchronicities, advanced communications even with (Mercury Retrograde in Capricorn). The Cazimi is in an (Earth sign of Capricorn), that is practical, grounded, serious-minded, and ambitious.

You always want to pay attention when the Sun changes zodiac signs. There is a dramatic shift in energies between the Sun in "expansive" Sagittarius to "practical" Capricorn. The key is to identify the pattens, cycles, habits, traits, and the characteristics that impact your natal chart & solar charts. In Western Astrology (Tropical) is based on the Sun position and the seasons. All of the zodiac will be impacted by this transit depending on the astrological house placements. The Sun is a (personal planet/star), where you want to analyze where you have Capricorn both in the position of the planets, and the position of the Houses. That will provide direct insight on how this impacts you.

The Sun is the vital principle, the life force. It is the giver of life. Sun is hot, positive, fiery and authoritative. It is the element of individuality, what you are all your life, and his place in your horoscope tells where you shine the best , and where you can earn your success. The Sun is your spirit and your sense of ego/paternal image.

Capricorn is ruled by Saturn & the 10th House of--career, the occupation, career acquisition, accolades, the profession, business, standing in the world, sphere of influence, professional reputation, honors, awards, fame & fortune, authority figures, the boss, credit, status, and recognition in the career. This is a great time to look where you have your natal MC or (Mid-Heaven) and see if your career sector is being lighted up or if you have planets in the 10th House.

Capricorn is an (Earth Sign) and is considered (Cardinal Sign) in the modes/modality.

Earth signs include—Taurus, Virgo, & Capricorn.

Cardinal signs include—Aries, Libra, Cancer, & Capricorn.

Team Capricorn characteristics, include being--stern, task-oriented, grounded, practical, ambitious, strong, always climbing in the career, serious-minded, determined, able to overcome obstacles, plan every step, powerful, concentrative, laborious, forceful, cautious, conservative, thrifty, scrupulous, trustworthy, detailed thinkers, fatalistic, stubborn, domineering, make good friends, although bad enemies, brooding and egotistic.

Cosmic Tip:

Team Capricorn is a grounded (Earth sign), that puts an emphasis on being responsible, ambitious, powerful, and climbing the company latter. Capricorn is ruled by the 10th House of—career, the occupation, sphere influence, status, your professional reputation, having authority figures give you the green-light to advance in your career. Check in with your career sector and see if you're content with your progress. With Mercury Retrograde in Capricorn, excellent to revise, review, self-scout, rebuild, and restructure where you want to be in your career.

On the solar chart we will have the Sun, Mercury, Pluto, all in Capricorn forming a (stellium). You could find greater purpose in your career, recognizing your talents & skills, while others take notice. Being ambitious pays dividends, putting in the work to attract a promotion and reach new heights in your career sector. With Pluto in Capricorn there has been a transformational shift taking place on some level.

Of course, you have to include Saturn (the natural ruler to Capricorn), which is currently touring dreamy Pisces. Here Saturn requires discipline, being task-oriented, playing by the rules, regulations, and terms & conditions. While Pisces wants to escape down the rabbit hole, Saturn has to work extra hard in order to keep things on point. Saturn likes to produce rewards for those who do the work, make the sacrifice, and dedicate themselves.

Check in with your Sun, Moon, Rising/Ascendant signs. Where you have Capricorn, Saturn and 10th House in your natal chart. Also review where you have dominant placements in Capricorn in your natal chart.

Enjoy the "practical" Sun in Capricorn!

Keep an eye on the Mercury (Cazimi) on Friday, December 23rd. See what comes through during this influence. --Astrological House Astrology. Capricorn Zodiac by Tashina Suzuki

[ghelgheli]

What did you think of the 2022-23 protests in Iran? Were they an attempted color revolution? I've seen that argument which is strange but at the same time it seems like any power vacuum would lead to chaos and a US approved puppet taking over so maybe the protesters were wrong even if sincere

i don't know that i can make any claims about "the" protesters being wrong or right—there was never a unified base in the protests that followed the killing of jina emini, and those involved included such varied groups as ethnic minorities demanding autonomy, ethnic persian feminists (sometimes bourgeoisie) claiming the struggle for themselves, working class demonstrators connecting the ethnic struggle to a broader labour struggle, anarchist blocs protesting the state as a whole, various intersections of these, and yes, certainly some who would have been pushing for american interventionism and something that you might call a colour revolution. in pretty much all of these cases we are talking about causes with long continuity, connected to ongoing movements protesting e.g. the rapidly worsening economic conditions under sanctions and inflation, water food and fuel scarcity, women's and lgbt struggles... the killing was a flashpoint but i do not think i can talk about the subsequent protests in isolation. some of the protesters may have been well-intentioned but ideologically misled, and i am sure that plenty of others knew exactly what it is they needed to do

in any case, what concerns me are claims to the effect of the one here, that revolutionary action is too risky as it will compromise the strength of the iranian state and invite american intervention. i don't know that i'd call myself a third-worldist, but this is strikes me as the precise converse of third-worldism, i.e. the claim that there is no revolutionary potential in the global south until the global north is unseated from its hegemony. and that is imo just wrong. the IRI, as a country with a pretty straightforwardly capitalist economy which has spent the last century undergoing massive industrialization and corresponding urbanization + proletarianization, can only transition into a socialist mode of production by a revolution. afaik the present state of labour organization is very weak, but to take a principled opposition to revolution because it would invite the US to assert its power is pessimistic in the extreme, fatalistic even.

it is the nature of revolutionary struggle in the global south that everything that is done must take into account the omnipresent threat of imperialism, but that is not to say that this is impossible. the '79 revolution was itself an anti-imperialist success, for all of its failures. i don't think revolution is coming soon to iran, but nor do i think it has to wait for the further decline of the usamerican empire; in fact, i think it can play a role in this decline, eventually

[shallowseeker]

The ghostly specter of John's hopes and dreams in SPN 1x01:

Above Baby Sam's crib, we see John's symbolic hopes and dreams. The crib mobile is filled with the baseball items John adores.

Baseball is a consistent special interest of John's, from the djinn dream where he plays softball to his #SPNwin dream of becoming a minor league catcher.

In SPNwin, he's not yet the monstrous inverse of his "dreamer" self. He's still the thing that attracted Mary to him: the soldier who hasn't lost his ability to dream. He keeps believing, even when Mary, a child-raised-soldier, feels like she can't muster up the strength to. Aside// Mary is like Dean this way, with lines like: "it only ends one way... bloody." On the other hand, John doesn't start there. It takes lying, coercion, and manipulation to get John's world to shrink, for his path[s] to narrow to hunting.

Hope is "what" John is (until, of course, he isn't):

MARY: I don't know. He's sweet, kind. Even after the war, after everything, he still believes in happily ever after, you know? Supernatural, 4x13 In the Beginning

// Until Mary died, it seems his dreams were difficult to extinguish. His primary mode of being was hopefulness:

Note: As Mary and John discuss their dreams, we see behind Mary some Jack Kline types of motifs, "The Future," crowing roosters, sunflowers, and a rainbow.

JOHN: See, I, I wanted to be a catcher for the Kansas City Athletics. MARY (fatalistic) : My parents never let me dream like that. Being a kid who killed monsters was my only option.

JOHN (wistful): You know, when I was a kid, I, uhm... I made this list of all of these places I was gonna go to look for my dad. Kept it for years, crossing off destinations, adding more. Enough time goes by... all you see is a list, you know? MARY (angry): Are you saying I should stop looking for my dad? JOHN: I'm saying that once you find him and leave hunting for good, you're gonna need a new list. The Winchesters, 1x03 You're Lost, Little Girl

We're familiar with the Winchester gun, but in the 20s Winchester (yes, the same gun brand: Winchester Rifles and Firearms Co) made a short run of baseball gear, known specifically for its top-of-the-line catcher's gear. It was outlasted by brands by Rawlings, Wilson, and Spalding.

Vintage Winchester catcher gear goes for ~$700 on eBay.

//

Here, John, the ever-hopeful soldier who holds onto his dreams will lose those dreams. The dreams will go up in smoke, and he emerges from the flames like a demon possessed.

In the words of Lady Toni Bevell (12x21): "A mad slowly going mad, searching for revenge."

[rainbowdaisy13]

There's a fatalistic part of my brain that wonders if Taylor is now looking for a beard on the level that Karlie has one. What if she also wants to be pregnant but needs a cover? Part of me does think their priorities as a couple have changed. I don't think it's so much about coming out, but more about shielding their family. Maybe she is still giving hints for something that is coming years from now, but not right now.

Obviously, there is no way to know for sure (no way to know anything for sure!), but maybe these giant steps backward are only steps backward from our perspective. I do hope she finds a better beard though. TK is abhorrent and the overexposure is making Swifties more insufferable than ever.

I definitely agree—in the NYU graduation speech she made it very clear her only goal now is protecting her family

It would be nice if they could go full closet mode until they are ready (if ever) to tell their story vs playing the Game with those that are paying attention for decades

[emmaelt]

On ADHD and time blindness

Time is such a funny concept to me.

It is going to be 2025 quite soon, and yet I am still stuck on the fact that it is next year and thus must be really far away. This concept of years feels so slow to me, but actually years are more fluid than I think they are, not blocks of their own but interconnected and only separated by the gap between one second and the next.

I have an issue with delayed gratification - it's so hard to motivate myself for some concept of the future that I can't even begin to grasp, that makes it so I want the thing now.

The other thing is that time doesn't always feel like it's taking the same space. One 5 minutes can stretch indefinitely, and the next can be so fast I don't notice it passing. I know this is about how distracted I am (bored is slow, engaged is fast) but also about my energy levels, the weather, where I am in my cycle, who I'm with. I'm not sure if this is an 'that's how everyone feels!' thing, or just a me thing.

Dr Devon Price talks about how neurodivergent people see time in chapter 6 of the book 'Unmasked', and introduces Rose's spiral rather than linear progression as the concept of time. It's been really interesting for me to understand that time does not have to be linear, but also really shocking for me to realise that actually I have never seen time like that! Time either is extremely slow, or it is much too fast. I simultaneously feel as if I have been 34 for years, and that I was just in Japan celebrating my birthday with my friends. There is no inbetween. I also feel 5, 16, 27, and 34 all at once. In fact, I actually also feel about 107, but I think that's because I didn't know I was neurodivergent until this year...

I get 'waiting mode' like many neurodivergent people, but mine has a tinge of rush to it, where I either cannot do a single thing or I must do all of the things. For example, I have an appointment with my personal trainer at 11am, I need to leave by 10:30, and I am a morning person - therefore I must have done all of my chores at lightning speed before 9am so I can sit and wait for an hour and a half? Why can I not pace them out and not exhaust myself? Why can I not do anything closer to the time?

There's also a part of me - that I think has always been there but was made worse by the events of 2015 (mainly the results of the American election) - where I feel as if the world will end before the thing I'm waiting for happens. This fatalist approach makes me mourn the things that I therefore think won't ever get to happen to me in particular, as well as to the world... I want everything to happen now so I don't miss it. The other part of it as well is that I am not expecting my brain to allow me to enjoy the thing by the time it does eventually happen - e.g. I am currently hyperfixated on Bridgerton, and season 4 may come by the time my brain decides I am no longer allowed to watch things again.

Going back to spiral time, my brain makes connections between supposedly random (to others) things, that feel so correct to me. Perhaps it's neurodivergence, synesthesia or similar. Certain months have connections - February and November have the same vibe to me, like siblings. June and December, though the weather is so different, feel the same somehow. I have it with numbers, textures, colours. I think it's also why I like certain harmonies in music over others, certain chord structures feel correct.

[lunapaper]

Album Review: 'I Don't Want You Anymore' - Cherry Glazerr

COVID lockdown, as it did for many, left Clementine Creevy with a lot of time to reflect, resulting in Cherry Glazerr’s darkest album yet. 

‘[T]he music I make is always a reflection of where I'm at in life, and what I'm going through,’ the singer/guitarist told Alternative Press It's funny because I was just telling someone that this album specifically might sound like it's the heaviest, darkest thing that I've made — and people have even been like, “Whoa, it's really heavy” — and I think that's true, but I also feel like I was in a worse place mentally in my life when I was writing [2017’s] Stuffed & Ready, the one that I put out before this one.’    An ode to tortured romance and all-consuming obsession, I Don’t Know You Anymore combines the slick, grimy grooves of 2017’s Apocalypstick with the fuzzy, synth-infused rock of Stuffed and Ready, along with a big, heaping dose of snark and sleaze. It’s like the audio equivalent of having an existential crisis while staying in a cheap motel room: The wallpaper peeling, the carpet all brown and matted, crying on the edge of a bed you’d be scared to run a UV light over. 

‘Addicted to Your Love’ aches with a melancholic desire, with Creevy declaring ‘I’d die for you.’ On ‘Soft Like a Flower,’ she admits, ‘I like you killing me.’ ‘Bad Habit’ does a complete 360 with its cybernetic dance pop, lit up in bright, lurid neon as the singer/guitarist likens her love to, well, y’know... ‘Sugar,’ meanwhile, can either be interpreted as a seductive promise or a threat, Creevy’s acid-fuelled self-loathing harking back to the scrappy, lo-fi charm of previous releases like Haxel Princess.    Though most of the tracks on I Don’t Want You Anymore describe a brutal and toxic love affair, they could just as easily apply to Creevy’s relationship with herself, often self-destructive and fatalistic. I’m a very therapeutic writer. It’s all a form of therapy for me,’ says Creevy. ‘I have a complicated relationship with myself. I went through a period of gaslighting myself a lot, because I had gotten into that mode [of] hanging out with people who did that.’     ‘Touched You With My Chaos’ is a rather desperate plea, Creevy breaking down under the weight of bruising riffs as she apologises to the people that ‘I’ve sucked into my world.’ ‘Ready for You’ - easily my favourite track on the album - seemingly revels in the aforementioned sleaze and scuzz, so delightfully menacing at times. But beneath the filth, there’s a world of pain (‘I get choked up/I've got to find my way outta my brain/Don't think that I can get the words out/I've got to find my way outta my brain/Up against me now’), Creevy ultimately at war with her own mind.    Eventually, though, the singer/guitarist comes to a grudging truce with her anxieties and insecurities. ‘Shattered’ contributes to a more psychedelic second half of the record, written in the aftermath of family drama when Creevy came to co-producer Yves Rothman ‘bawling’ and ‘crying.’    Interesting detours like the glitchy and fluttering nu-jazz of ‘Golden’ and the swirling Tame Impala-esque ‘Eat You Like a Pill,’ with its lush synth work and limber bass, also deliver on the dark yet kooky humour and wordplay that Creevy has long made her own. ‘Wild Times’ is especially fun, its woozy New Wave feeling like a much grimier take on city pop. Seriously, Make City Pop Grunge Again... for the First Time.    I Don’t Want You Anymore is one big filthy rock exorcism, Creevy tearing into the emotional viscera with a hurricane force. It’s messy, brutally human and downright ugly at times but also rather fun, effortlessly swerving between grooves. Rock hasn’t felt this exciting in a while, and it’s a shame that bands who serve up sweaty, ramshackle garage rock in spades like Cherry Glazerr, Slothrust and Bully are (still) so wildly underrated, sounding a hell of a lot rawer and more interesting than what the rock scene is delivering nowadays... 

I definitely want more of this... 

- Bianca B.

[late-to-the-fandom]

♾- does my muse believe that history inevitably repeats itself or can we influence events to shape something altogether new?

👯‍♂️- how would my muse react to learning they are a clone?

🦅- is my muse reverential or disdainful of wildlife? Why?

Aaaand

👷🏻- how does my muse see the working class? Do they exist to serve those in power or should they be helped when possible?

For Elisewin and Renathal, or just one if that's too many questions lol

Gosh, these questions are wild.

Ok, for the first one, both Renathal and Elisewin are an interesting blend of fatalistic and motivated about the ability to change the course of history. They do both believe that individuals can influence outcomes, but where Renathal would say everything is pre-ordained by the purpose (and then claim paradox and divine mystery when asked how that gels with free will), Elisewin is more on the side of, we have the ability to change the course of events and create better outcomes in the future, but we are unlikely to because people are terrible on the whole and there is no divine power guiding the cosmos as a whole to a good and righteous destiny. That's the best theology I can do on this little sleep.

Renathal would be devastated to learn he was a clone. Finding out he is not a unique and special creation of Denathrius' would pretty much shatter his self-worth and send him into existential crisis mode for a while. Better not to tell him. Elisewin might actually be relieved to find out she was a clone because in a weird way it would absolve her of all the decisions she regrets (because she's only a clone of a host that was really responsible for those decisions). Clones and theology, gosh.

I think both Elisewin and Renathal maintain a basic sense of respect for wildlife, aren't going to go out of their way to kill anything, but if it comes down to it, they're not going to feel guilty about killing something that attacks them first.

And both Elisewin and Renathal are servant leaders, meaning they believe it's the responsibility of leaders to serve their "working class", not the other way around. Of the two of them, Renathal is going to have a more innate sense of entitlement to go along with that, but can rarely be accused of being less than respectful to his servants.

Thank you for the asks! My writing streak was great while it lasted, but I'm afraid I've fallen back into brain fog over the weekend 😭 Trying to shake it!