#fee talks mental health

[silentreigns]

Not even being dramatic when I say this is the 2nd worst gymnastics scandal after Sydney 2000. The FIG should be ASHAMED of themselves for their handling of this Olympics

[trapper-faggot]

my psych sent me therapist recs and they look great and GOD do i need therapy but also christ hate how most therapists dont work with insurance and how expensive they are

[beepmon]

i’m panicking about my health, my car, school, my future, my relationships with ppl, about my entire life rn p much

[bigshoeswamp]

as someone who works with conflict, i really just hate it sometimes

[butts-bouncing-on-the-beltway]

The experience of finagling your schedule to better suit a client who has been struggling with attendance only for them to immediately no-show the new time too.

Buddy I have a waiting list, I do not have time for you to skip sessions for months at a time.

[rose-pearls]

Percy Jackson (series) Masterlist

Welcome to my Percy Jackson Masterlist, requests are open and if you want to have a look at other fandoms you can go right here: Main Masterlist

Luke Castellan

Oneshot:

Early Morning

A secret early morning rendez-vous is crashed by a sleepy Percy.

The perils of love

Being in love with Luke seemed to be a bad idea as you realise that he doesn't seem to be interested. But as you get ready to move on from love entirely your father decides to appear and two people fall for you.

Requests:

Jealous Luke

A Luke x reader where the reader makes Luke jealous

Clarisse La Rue

Oneshot:

Healing one cut at a time

Clarisse first goes to the med bay because she is forced by one of her siblings but the following times are just to see the daughter of Apollo again.

The perils of love

Being in love with Luke seemed to be a bad idea as you realise that he doesn't seem to be interested. But as you get ready to move on from love entirely your father decides to appear and two people fall for you.

Prompts:

Snow on the beach

Cuddling with Clarisse

Requests:

Pride over love

Could I request something for Clarisse x reader? Where reader and Clarisse are cuddling after clarisse get a nightmare and are in a secret relationship. Then the next day word get's out that clarisse was cuddling with someone because of that clarisse breaks up with reader because she doesn't wanna ruin her reputation. You can decided what happens after that! Thank you so much and take your time!

Sweet but deadly

Could request something for clarisse x reader? Where reader is daughter of persphone and she’s sweet and kind but also strong and intimidating and can stand for herself and that’s what clarisse likes abt her

Dare

Basically Clarisse gets dared to get reader to fall in love with her, eventually clarisse wins the dare and get's the money but has caught feeings and doesn't want reader to find out it's all been a bet. someone informs reader of the bet. They fight and break it off. Causing clarisse to get super sad and act ooc. At the end Clarisse finds reader during capture the flag or something and they talk it out.

The daughter of revenge

Clarisse x reader. Where R is daughter of Nemesis? Normally being very quiet and "calm", and, as she is the daughter of the Goddess of Revenge, she helps to take revenge on those who hurt Clarisse, even in games of capture the flag, in a discreet way and they almost never find out it was her. In addition to being extremely good at chess and strategies as well.

Married life

Can I request a clarisse fan fic where she asks you to marry her and what it’s like when you guys are married

Nightmares

Where she get's with reader and her father ends up telling her she's weak in her dream. The next day she trains until she passes out and reader finds her and nurses her back to health. Then just some good ol hurt and comfort!

Stupid crush

Clarisse has a crush on reader but she ends up hurting the reader in previous interactions. It isn't until a game of capture the flag that she is able to explain it all.

Soft Love

Could your possibly write a Clarisse x Hephaestus’s Nb kid reader. Like we’ll make/repair weapons for her, and we weld her flowers with nuts and bolts and cute stuff like that!!

Tragic Love

Clarisse fanfic where the reader is the daughter of Poseidon and there like absolutely in love with eachother like soulmates but then the reader dies during the war and clarisse can’t handle it and dies too like Romeo and Juliet

Mental health

Clarisse x daughter of Athena fic where (tw: sh) the reader has some control issues/is a bit of a control freak and sh to feel in control and clarisse finds out and helps her find some healthier coping mechanisms - Warning: Self-Harm

Percy Jackson

One shots:

Lost without you

As Luke's sister you had only seen the best in him but as the identity of the lightning thief comes to light your whole world breaks down. (Brother!Luke & Sister!reader, Percy Jackson x reader)

[sparreaux]

Stop the Eviction!

As most of my followers know, my spouse and I (both disabled and living on a single income) have been fighting to stay in our rental home for months now. This started when our landlord decided to start using a local property management company who decided all back rent needed to be paid or we needed to leave. (Honestly, that part is fair as we owed quite a bit.)

This was, quite unfortunately, a few days after I had had a harrowing accident where I fell very hard and received a concussion, which has only added to our stress as it affected both my health physically and mentally as well as costing my short term memory. (I still cannot remember that night or the next week clearly) I have been struggling with managing my symptoms since.

We have striven to get the company their money at a detriment to our utilities and food bills, but we have been fortunate to receive so much help and support.

For the past several months, it's only gotten worse. The company had a court date we were never notified of (which had us judged as no shows so the company was free to break any repayment contract we had signed), added fees such as a pet deposit we paid when we moved into this house almost six years ago, legal fees for said court date, late fees that were never discussed before, extra fees from who knows where and basically have just been monthly harassing us with ten day eviction notices and even threatened us with the sheriff. Also they're claiming we didn't pay them on a certain month. Every time we thought we were on track, they'd pull something else. They've been rude and quite frankly, I would love to move to a different house if that was at all an option, but it's honestly not.

I had set up a gofundme, but since we've been paying everything we've got to back rent, our phones have been shut off for the time being and I am completely unable to log in to update or anything.

The management's company's ledger for us currently sits at $2,275.00. They are asking for at least $1000 before the end of the month, after we've already paid our monthly rent plus some. We have people that we can talk to on Monday, but unfortunately, nothing else until then.

I am also very, very behind on commissions. There are several that are almost finished, but my fibromyalgia has been badly flaring, making it extremely difficult to put out the results I want. That being said, if you do not mind waiting a few months, I will happily add you to my art commission list for whatever you'd like to donate to help us.

Tl;dR: Two disabled people with pets are trying not to be evicted. Will draw for donations.

Thank you so much for current and past support. I promise I am trying to get back to everyone who has helped, it is just taking time, more time than I expected. I am sorry and again, thank you.

0/$2275

C*shapp, P*ypal, V*nmo: duessa

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for asking my parents to pay my tuition for the semester, lying about how I lost my scholarship, and then planning on lying to my dad regarding his requirements in exchange for him paying the tuition?

My (20X) college has a scholarship for offspring of faculty members, and I was lucky enough to have my application accepted by the college that my dad (53M) works at. This means that I get a full ride scholarship; if I graduate within 4 years, I won't have to pay a single penny to my college (books and supplies not included, of course).

Unfortunately, the scholarship does have two requirements; I need to have taken at least a certain amount of credits semester before (not a ridiculous number), and for that semester, I need to have gotten over a 2.0/4.3 GPA. Easy enough, right? Who can't get a GPA over 2.0?

Well. I suffered a mental health downfall the past semester and I ended up failing half my classes. I was unable to sit my finals. I know this wasn't smart of me, and I think I should've done something about my academic situation other than just wait for the semester to be over, but I had quit a semester due to my mental health decline previously and I didn't want a repeat of that. In any case, I got a GPA of about 1.6. I'm not on probation but I did receive a warning.

Fortunately, this doesn't mean I lost my scholarship for good. I just need to fulfill those requirements in the upcoming semester and I get it back.

I realized I did need to pay my tuition this semester two days before tuition fee acceptance closes and I debated telling only one of my parents. My mom wants me to finish college no matter what, and my dad has told me that he does not care anymore as long as I don't stress him out. He's also told me he no longer has any expectations for me whatsoever. I did also consider talking about it with my brother and borrowing money from him to put together the tuition fee.

I figured I'd bite the bullet and just told my dad, who I know has been stressed about my future and how badly I'm doing in college. I just casually dropped it as I was making breakfast for myself and then we had a lengthy conversation that my mother (51F) joined when she got back home.

I don't remember much of the conversation (I may have memory problems) but the AITA mentioned part is that I lied to my parents and told them I did sit all my finals and try my best. I didn't. I tried that for mid term exams but I had nothing to write, so for finals I didn't sit them at all. This happened with three of the classes I was taking. I just didn't take my finals. My dad was suspicious of my claim; he said that as a professor himself he wouldn't fail students who at least submitted homework and sat their exams to write anything at all, but I maintained that I tried.

The conclusion was that my dad would be willing to pay my tuition if I got my shit together and also deleted my social media, which he thinks is a drain on my time and energy. He's not wrong. I deleted my Twitter accounts immediately afterwards (which my parents don't know about) because I've been thinking about it, but I can't really bring myself to get rid of Discord, where so many of my friends are. People I've met while studying internationally, long-term friends who moved to other countries; Discord is the only way to contact these people.

This is the AITA part; if my dad follows up on that particular requirement to check if I deleted Discord, which he particularly dislikes (he has previously confiscated the electronics I bought with my own money that I earned, after he saw me on muted call at night with some friends), I plan on deleting the app/program on my devices but using it anyway as a website. This would be a betrayal of my dad's trust in me, but there's no love lost between us anyway. He's already told me he doesn't love me unconditionally. (Yes, I'm his biological child and he did raise me.)

I also feel like an asshole because I could've settled this with the help of my brother; I'd pick up a job during the winter break to pay him back, but it would have been done eventually. Or I could've just gone to my mom. She works her own job, and we could've figured it out together without telling my dad. I told my dad anyway, wanting him to pay the tuition, even though I knew that talking about having to spend money on his kids stresses him out deeply.

My mom also told my dad to go to therapy (in detail, so I know it wasn't just something she said as a throwaway thing) during the conversation. It did get heated. I don't disagree, but I don't know if that'd be okay; mental health is stigmatized where I am, and my dad as a grown adult man and a respected professor if seen going to therapy could have his reputation kind of effected. It wouldn't have happened if I just brought up this whole situation quietly up to my mom, or just my brother.

So I lost my scholarship, I lied to my parents about the technicalities of how that happened, and I'm asking for some amount of money from my parents but also planning on lying to them in regards to the terms they set out. AITA?

What are these acronyms?

[compassionatereminders]

Read this before sending me an ask

I'd love to see you in my inbox, but there's a couple things I want you to keep in mind before we start...

I am not a mental health professionals and I am not comfortable trying to be a stand in for one. So...

Don't ask me to diagnose you

Don't ask me how to successfully treat or recover from any symptom or disorder

Don't ask me how to successfully cope with, escape or recover from any traumatic/abusive situation

Don't ask me to talk you out of self harm or suicide

Don't ask me to provide in depth educational resources

Don't ask me how to successfully heal from/move on from something

I am not qualified to speak on every subject out there. So...

Don't ask me for advice related to studying or working. I am on disability benefits and have no formal education, so I am literally the last person on Earth who you should ask about your homework or your boss.

There are many marginalized experiences I can't speak on, so don't ask me to SPECIFICALLY speak about being physically disabled, transgender, gay, a person of color, fat, poor or a survivor of childhood trauma. Since I am not any of these things, I won't attempt to speak on behalf of those who are

I am not comfortable with people I don't know using my blog for any kind of promotion, and I have decided not to reblog graphic depictions of suffering here, so...

I won't be reblogging donation posts.

I won't be signal boosting anything.

I won't be reblogging posts not relevant to my blog theme/rules no matter how important

I won't follow or message you just because you follow me

I won't let anyone use anon to badmouth other tumblr users

That being said, you are more than welcome to use my inbox to...

Vent (as long as you don't expect me to provide specific answers to everything)

Ask me for my opinions/advice (as long as you respect the guidelines listed above)

Ask me personal questions

Just tell/ask me whatever!

And if you want to buy me a little treat, I now have a ko-fi:

[bitchesgetriches]

Hi! I have a question that has been really weighing me down

Is there any way to get fees waived on late payments?

Example: I live in a state with a lot of tolls. I don’t have ezpass and have to pay at the toll. They also have an option where if you dont have cash you can get a ticket to pay online later.

However, the ticket takes 24 hours to activate and once activated is only available for 5 days. I have AuDHD and I constantly forget to go back and pay the tickets.

I now have over $1000 in ‘violations’ even though the total amount of the tolls I have neglected to pay is well under $50. If I could just pay the original amount I owed, I would be able to easily. But they throw $50 fines on $2 or less tolls and I cannot afford to pay all the fines.

If I leave this unpaid will this negatively affect my credit score? Is my car at risk of being repossessed? Please help, I’m so scared

Honey, that is some predatory nonsense. Sounds literally like highway robbery!

I think you need to invest in an EZ Pass or some other way to automatically pay the tolls. Because it's going to save you money in the long term.

Next, you need to call the toll company and work out a payment plan. As with most late bills, the company would rather get paid SOMETHING rather than nothing at all. You should ask them if they can waive all or most of the fees (literally just ask--this works about half the time I've ever asked on late fees and overdraft fees). Offer to pay something up-front to show a good faith effort in sticking to a payment plan.

While they can't repossess your car for late fees, this can and will damage your credit score if they report you to collections. So you want to get ahead of the situation before it gets to that point.

Lastly, let's look at the root of the problem: Your ADHD. It is literally costing you money, and I bet it's not just through these late fees. Talk to a therapist or an ADHD support group about how to set up systems for managing your ADHD symptoms so that they won't lead you into financial trouble again. Here's more advice:

How Mental Health Affects Your Finances

My 25 Secrets to Successfully Working from Home with ADHD 

If you found this helpful, consider joining our Patreon.

[hayleysayshay]

CR twitter having a normal one and deciding CR is the end all be all of targeted activism

I have seen these posts get like 500 likes asking CR to donate and then Matt’s response where he talks about poor mental health but says that he’s given 15k of their own money to Gaza is like, clear they align with a pro Palestine position. And this response has got 28k likes. It’s a very online bubble talking to each other, and they cannot see that they’re posting the same information to each other and aren’t changing any damn minds.

Very high possibility CR can’t say anything on the Critical Role accounts because of their contracts with Amazon. So what if they never post for these people? Maybe just give up and move on?

When I first got into the fandom I saw all this cool clothing merch so I looked for their code of ethics. Couldn’t find one. Emailed the shop/site about it, never got a response. Gave up and moved on.

My genuine position it’s nice when they do do something good, but I have no expectations otherwise, they’re not an ethical company they’re a business.

And it’s totally normal to be disappointed and want to spend your money and time elsewhere, I’m not here to tell you you’re wrong, but I think some twitter activists people have lost sight of a bigger picture by being in a bubble. I just don’t care to centre a damn media company in my activism and have better things to worry about than fucking Critical role.

Like I donate monthly anyway and adhoc donations. I wouldn’t donate to a fundraiser unless there was something amazing offered during it, as a) I prefer to just give straight to the charity as I think that avoids processing fees b) it probably wouldn’t even be in my timezone? Idk people can just donate anyway, people are already well organised and you don’t need Critical Role to do it for you.

Support who you want, but turning other fans not boycotting critical role, the DnD media company, into a litmus test if you’re a good person or not a bit ridiculous here, and a bit unserious.

[soaps-mohawk]

The amount of power you hold by making this series is INSANE LIKE I HAVE SO MANY QUESTION AND THEORIES

Like the institute, was it a bad experience? A good one? A mix? Does Omega! Reader have any specific memories that don't seem to leave? Maybe the omega's who had behavioral issues were punished but no one spoke of the punishments? I HAVE SO MANH THOUGHTS

That's what I love about reading fic series is that the readers talk to the writers and I feel like yall just sit and laugh like 'these guys have no idea how much pain I'm about to cause them' LMFAO like your the person behind the slaughter

No but really y'all have no idea what's coming. Even here very soon...y'all have no idea lmaooo

(please don't hate me I promise it has a happy ending 😬)

Institutes are not good places. I'll just clear that up right now, even though that's going to be kind of brought up here in a couple chapters. They are not good places and they never really have been. They were started in the late 19th century as a place to send omegas that had behavioral issues, health issues, all sorts of issues or perhaps were unwanted by families that couldn't support them or didn't want to have to deal with the work that goes into omegas. So think like mental institutions. They were run by "doctors and professionals" that "understood omegas" and could cure/fix/care for them.

Of course as the years went on people started to realize maybe not everything that goes on in them is so good and after some investigations and such there was a huge reform on institutes and they became more like they are in the present day in the fic. Actual institutes that "care for omegas and prepare them for pack life." Originally omegas didn't leave institutes after they were handed over, but then people realized there was money in institutes so naturally, they started dumping money into them to train omegas and then pretty much sell them off. Not directly like selling humans, but most institutes require application payments and then there's fees for all sorts of things like testing, files, anything they can legally charge for, they will.

Obviously we're beginning to realize a bit at this point that not everything the reader learned at the institute is...right. What omegas are taught and how they're taught varies institute to institute, usually based on the types of alphas that are seeking omegas from the institute. So institutes that have higher standing, more funding, tend to teach more subservience and obedience because that's where you have the rich alphas and the politicians and government looking at omegas. Lower level institutes might teach more how to serve and keep a pack since they might have the upper middle class, future family pack omegas. The lowest level institutes might also teach subservience and obedience less in an "I have an appearance to uphold" type of way and more of a "these are not good alphas picking up these omeags and we know that" type of way.

So, the reader didn't have a good experience because there is no real good experience at an institute. They're very strict, controlling, almost abusive in some instances (kneeling for two hours anyone?) Not every omega gets sent to an institute either. Some omegas live with their families until they're old enough to start seeking an alpha themselves. I think I did touch on that briefly in a chapter somewhere.

There's so much I could talk about on institutes omg. This is probably way more than you expected 😅 I just love this stuff so much.

[intellectual6666]

I have some things to talk about, which I felt and saw after I got my CBSE 10th results.

Everyone takes credit. Like relatives who for the whole year kept saying, "our children also gave boards, why are they (my parents) acting like it's such a big thing?", "they are showing as if only they have work and they are busy, we are useless na", came to say, "she is our daughter/granddaughter, that's why she excelled in her exams." I do have a lot of respect for them and yes, I love them a lot too and also you can take credits of it, due to their ashirvad I was able to excel in the exams but why act like they are "only" reason I got good marks in it ? I would like to give 50% credits to my parents and the rest to me and my God. There was also a time when my father was not able to give the monthly fees of my school for 3 months, but he managed to keep me in a English medium private school by working his ass off. My mother left her social life, didn't even go to ISKCON (her favourite place) so that she can keep her full attention on me. We went through so much financial issues in 2022 and 2023 (first half) but my parents didn't let my education sacrifice. I, didn't take any tuitions so that I do not put extra burden on them (another reason I didn't take tuition coz I prefer self study more than tuitions). Me, who got so stressed because of my class 10 boards that by the time my exams were near my mental health worsened. I was getting suicidal thoughts and got introduced to new health problems which still haunt me, hypertension and palpitation. But still, I worked hard, my closest friends helped me, my parents helped me and most importantly Krishna ji, Ganesh ji, Radharani ji and Mahadev helped me. My struggle was totally mine and no one fought the war inside me other than me. So before taking the whole credit, atleast for once one should think about the people who really worked hard.

Second, this comparison shit kills one inside. No, I didn't compare myself to anyone as my parents never taught me that nor they ever compared me to anyone. Basically me and my maternal uncle's daughter are really close. And she is quite average in her studies. But trust me she is an amazing dancer, singer and artist. I envy her because of the great acting skills she have. But according to that typical thoughts, her parents always compare her with me and try to demean her, on the thing that she is not much good in studies and I'm comparatively good in it. Her results came out some days ago, as she used to study in an ICSE school and to be honest, she did amazing. Getting such marks is not so easy in ICSE board. Yesterday her mother kept comparing her with me and made her feel insecure and bad. Like why ? What do you get by hurting a child ? Why the actual fuck can't you ever be satisfied with whatever she got ? Praise her, tell her she is amazing, bring some confidence in her instead of making her feel so insecure that she starts to kill her feelings for everyone. Please freaking stop that. My mother, as usual a boss lady, replied her so sassily that my sissy ran to her and hugged her for 15 minutes straight. All of my closest friends got above 90% and I got below it, but God my parents didn't think about that for even once. They kept praising me.

So this was a rant post and you can totally ignore it if you want. Sorry for writing such a long ass thing, I had a lot to burst out.

And also sorry if there's any spelling mistake.

Congratulations to all the 10thies and 12thies for acing your exams. Everyone did amazing. I'm proud of you.

[heavenssexiestangel]

Aid Request

I am not used to making such posts, and I debated making it, in the first place... But I need help.

I have been laid off work on Dec 31st, 2023, and I wouldn't have been paid enough to pay what I need to, anyway.

I am in what I hope to be my last year of university. I need to take 2 exams and write my thesis. Unfortunately, I'm also over the usual years, which means I didn't get the state aid to pay less on the University Fees. The delay has been caused both my decaying mental health because of my family, that I live with, and other health issues I suffered in the past 2 years.

I wanted to graduate in March (which means not paying the fees), but my thesis professor said it will probably not be possible. This is due to her not answering my many e-mails about the thesis, so much that I had to ask the Uni tutor for help communicating with her... It's a whole damn saga.

Since dropping out isn't an option (I would want to, but I am not allowed to by said family, who think it would be shameful to drop out now and that people would talk, and that it's my fault for being lazy and stupid - I live with them until October, when I'm moving in with @michaelmilligan, and no, they don't have money to help me out), I need to ask for help covering the Fees.

One fee is already overdue, it should have been paid Dec 19, 2023, but I still hoped to graduate in March. It amounts to €1275 and I will also have to pay a fee over it as well, so it's more than that but I'm not sure how much.

The second fee is also €1275, and must be paid by March 15, 2024.

I can show both on my uni website if requested.

My next goal is to graduate by July.

All this said, I need help covering all of this at least...

If you can spare anything at all, please consider donating through my Ko-Fi or through Paypal (my e-mail is demonicsoulmatesart@gmail.com). If you'd like to get something out of it, I do have a Redbubble Shop. I don't have many things on it yet, but I hope to add more soon.

So here's what I need so far:

Goal: 0/2550

Thank you,

Dean

[jamsterrr]

P. SEONGHWA . . . FATAL ATTRACTION 6 ⭑.ᐟ

seonghwa. fatal love. ex lovers. “ i want you again .. “

description ; thinking it was for the best , breaking up with your boyfriend of 3 years since you both “ grew apart “ but when a mis understanding comes about. what will happen when you’re forced to spend time together, what happened to those “ we just grew apart “ feelings.

seonghwa!ateez x female!reader

words : 2.3k

contains. ‼️ ; cursing , sexual scenes , 18+ content , may contain typos , slight slow burn. ( let me know if i miss anything ! )

𓍢ִ໋🌷͙֒ part 5 here.

———— .. ᯓᡣ𐭩 ( part six ) ᡣ𐭩ᯓ .. ————

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 .ᐟ

Seonghwa sat with you as the both of you ate, his eyes on you, paying attention to the mood you were in, though you seemed to be a bit better with each bite of food.

You appreciated how Seonghwa treated you even with the two of you not being a couple anymore, it made you happy to know he was still here with you even after not seeing you for almost a month. Though those feelings were starting to catch back up.

“Are you done?” He asked, you returning the question with a small nod. You felt better, but stayed quiet, figuring since the incident just happened almost an hour ago, your body felt exhausted. “I’ll go and take our plates, I’ll be right back okay?” Seonghwa said softly, his arm gently being placed on your shoulder, his thumb rubbing the soft material of your shirt before he collected the plates and gave you a reassuring look before exiting the room.

You on the other hand laid back on the bed, your hands rubbing through Pop’s golden locks as he finally stopped begging for food and just placed his nose across your leg.

Seonghwa cleared the plates and placed them into the sink as he leaned against it, sighing slightly.

His eyes catching Mrs. Song, his mother and father, Yeosang, Hongjoong, Mingi and Lily sitting together at the table, his blood boiling at the thought of how Lily has such a smug look on her face, acting completely clueless about the shit that flew out of her mouth earlier.

He never really saw this side of her the couple of times he’d met her around Mingi, though he did notice she always put on an act.

“Ah! Seonghwa, come join, Lily has to tell us something” his mother called over to him. “Ah, no thanks, I really should be getting back to Y/N” he spoke up, standing near the island that sort of separated the kitchen and dining room in the rustic cabin. Seonghwa’s eyes looked over at Mingi’s, he seemed slightly off put by what the woman said as well. Mental health wasn’t a joke.

“How’s she doing?” His father asked, looking back to look at him, Seonghwa giving a nod. “She’s fine- she’s fee-”

“We’re getting married!” Lily shouted, cutting the males answer off. Everyone’s eyes shooting over to the woman, a gasp dropping from Mrs. Song’s mouth before Mrs. Park gasped and stood up, joining her in a hug and to look at the ring. Yeosang and Hongjoong nearly spitting their food out, their eyes darting to Mingi.

His smile wasn’t as bright as before and he just nodded. Not that he wasn’t happy about it, he wasn’t proud of Lily’s actions.

Seonghwa widened his eyes at the announcement. “Married?!” He asked, looking at Lily as she looked at his mother and nodded happily. “I need another cigarette..” Mrs. Song spoke, grabbing the pack from her pocket and made her way to the outside. Mingi smiles and got up before walking out, back to his mother who stepped out on the back porch.

“Wow.. damn congratulations” Hongjoong said as he stood up. “Not going to lie, did not imagine Lily would be someone he’d engage himself to” he spoke to Yeosang as Yeosang shook his head. “Never in one million years..”.

Seonghwa shook his head. Rude asshole he thought about Lily.

Before anymore thoughts could linger on his mind he finished the sentence of talking with his dad and made his way back upstairs to you. Quietly entering the room, he looked around as you were quietly asleep. Figuring that it would be best for you to get some shut eye. You had a long and eventful day.

After Seonghwa left the room you watched a bit of the television before closing your eyes. Though you attempted to wait until Seonghwa got back, your eyes couldn’t. It might’ve been the crying earlier, but your body wanted rest and who were you to deny it that.

Your eyes closed, your body going into a slight shutdown mode as if you haven’t been to sleep in the last few four months.

Seonghwa looked at you, a small smile creeping over his face as he shut the door to minimize any other sound that would come from outside. He reached over to the lamp placed on the dresser and clicked it off. Making his way to the sliding doors that led to the balcony and shut the curtains, the sun going down rather fast.

His body slowly laid on the bed, his arm wrapping back around you as he pulled you into his chest. Trying carefully not to wake you as he covered you both.

A soft groan escaped your lips before you turned slightly, Pop’s head gently flapping onto the bed before you snuggled in closer to the male, getting comfortable and keeping yourself snuggled against him.

Seonghwa gently ran his hands through your hair before he closed his eyes. His body relaxing as he also joined you in a deep sleep.

- -

It was around three in the morning when you woke up, your eyes burning slightly from the actions that occurred earlier.

You slowly tip toed out of bed and into the bathroom, releasing your leaking bladder before sighing out of relief. Being as quiet as possible you flushed the toilet and washed your hands, waiting for the toilets noise to silence before opening the door back up.

Your dry throat persuaded you to go downstairs to grab something to drink, a water bottle for something soothing and refreshing at this time in the morning. Slowly slipping on your house shoes you crept downstairs, your footsteps quiet as you made your way to the fridge, taking a bottled water, turning around and widening your eyes, your mouth being covered.

“Don’t scream, don’t wake anyone up, you scare easy” the male spoke. Yeosang chuckling at your expression as you nodded against his hand and he slowly put it down, your hand hitting his shoulder.

“You scared the shit out of me, what are you doing up” you whisper yell, opening the bottle. “Doing the same thing as you” he spoke, his hands grabbing a water bottle from the fridge.

“I feel like we haven’t been able to talk in a while” the male slightly frowned. “Here, let’s go outside” you spoke, signing to the back door as he went to it, going out with you following after.

Once you both stepped out you could feel the cold breeze creep across your legs. “So how are you feeling? Seonghwa told me and Hongjoong earlier, so we helped bring in the groceries. Though I wanted to hear it from you, you’re my best friend” Yeosang spoke, gently turning to you and taking your hand as you looked at him, his face being illuminated by the light on the porch.

You gently sighed, the feelings washing away from you, since it was a little later. You could freely talk about it. “I’m okay now, i separated from Seonghwa and I had gotten lost after trying to find Pop some more dog food” you said, your body tensing, thinking about it again.

Yeosang didn’t rush, he didn’t make you feel as if you *needed* to tell him and that’s why you enjoyed his friendship the most. You slowly continued as you felt him press his arm against your shoulder in a reassuring way. “I tried to find my way back, and everything looked the same, Seonghwa found me after we called” you spoke, taking a deep sigh.

“I’m glad he found you, he’s such a good boyfriend to you” Yeosang spoke, as you looked at him with slight confusion in your face. “What?” You asked before Yeosang looked back at you with the same confusion. “Hm??”

Then it dawned on you, you never told Yeosang about you and Seonghwa. “Ahh, yea, he’s an amazing boyfriend” you said, a slight blush appearing on your face from how flustered it made you. “Yeah, okay~ I’m about to go and get some more sleep. You should do the same” the other smiles and hummed, gently rubbing your arm and bringing you into a comfortable hug. You smiled and laid your head on Yeosang’s chest. Feeling as if it’s been years that you’ve hugged the male.

The hug lingered for a bit, you gently pulled away and he did the same. You both dispersed and went your own separate ways, back to your shared room. Slowly slipping your way back into the room as you quietly got back into bed, hearing the soft snores from Seonghwa. You let your body relax as you stared at the ceiling. "Where'd you go?" the male asked, he turned on his back, his head turning to yours, though there wasn't much for you to see, you could still see his eyes, the slight worried yet tired look lingering in them.

"I stepped out to take a breather, and then Yeosang came out, we talked for a bit" you spoke, and he hummed. "Don't be gone for so long, it's 4 in the morning" he spoke, pointing to the clock that flashed the time 2:58am. "I think you need to get your eyesight checked" you said. "Shh" he shushed as you heard a small chuckle escape from the male's lips as he turned to you, his arms wrapping around your body. You just fell into the males comfy and closed your eyes. The both of you falling back to sleep in a timely manner.

--

"How are you feeling?" you were asked when you walked downstairs, Mingi and Hongjoong sitting on the couch, surprisingly Lily wasn't found, not that you were complaining. "I'm better, thanks to Seonghwa and resting" you gave credit. Hongjoong smiled and patted the space near him and Mingi. Mingi's gaze was on you, as if his eyes were burning a hole through you. You tried to avoid eye contact with him. Seonghwa flopped down next to you before Mingi stood up. "Can I talk to you Y/N?". You looked over to Seonghwa as he gave you a reassuring nod and made his way to replace Mingi's seat as you stood up, following the taller male outside to the back porch, where you'd seemed to be found quite often.

"I want to apologize" He started off as you fondled with the ruffles of the dress you were wearing, though your attention was quickly brought to Mingi. "I'm sorry Lily said that about you, it was rude and disrespectful. I've known you for a long time and fiancé or not, you don't deserve to be treated like that" the male continued to speak. "I talked to her about it, and she said she was sorry, but she didn't seem genuine". You sighed and shook your head. "Mingi, you don't have to apologize for anything that Lily does, she's an adult, and if she doesn't want to apologize that's fine" you spoke. "As long as we are good, that's all that matters" you said, it sounding a bit kind of like a question.

You noticed the male's expression lift a bit. "Yeah, of course we are. Though I have been curious about one thing since you've been here." "What's that?" "Are you and Seonghwa a thing? I remember he told me you two broke up, that's why I was so shocked to see you. You nodded a little, putting your hand on your chin before you cleared your throat. "We are, but he told me he didn't tell his parents, about us breaking up. So, I decided to come."

To be completely truthful, you felt as if you were starting to fall for Seonghwa all over again. These past few days allowing you to regain the connection you once felt with him. But were you ready to express that feeling? Were you ready to go back to Seonghwa? An annoying high pitch voice knocked you out of your mind as Lily approached the two of you. Mrs. Park and Mrs. Song following behind.

"Y/N! Sweetheart, it's so nice seeing you again, how are you feeling?". God, were you tired of hearing that question. "Better" you replied as Lily wrapped her arms around Mingi. You stepped aside, exchanging a silent bow with Mrs. Song as she walked into the house, a slight smile on her lips. "That's amazing, we are doing something today, think you'd be up for it? We are having a party for Lily and Mingi's engagement.

Of course, she told everyone when you were there. "Oh my gosh, congratulations" you said, looking at Lily and then Mingi's whose expression wasn't as happy as the two women. "Must be so sad that Seonghwa hasn't engaged you yet, how long's it been?" she snarled at you. You scoffed, shaking your head before you licked your lips, trying to calm the words from coming out of your mouth, because she would *not* like them.

"Cut it out Lily, damn" Mingi groaned and unwrapped her hand from his as he left into the house, leaving Lily dumfounded with the smug look wiped off her face. You shook your head and followed Mingi inside, figuring you didn't need to say anything more. You made your way back in the cabin, going back to the boys where Yeosang has now joined them. You went over to Seonghwa were you felt a tug on your arm before his arm wrapped around your waist and pulled you into his lap, his arms wrapped securely around your waist, your ass pressed against his bulge. Is he hard, is he hinting something?.

Your eyes widened slightly as you looked at Seonghwa who didn't seem to be too bothered at it. His eyes glancing at you before back to the TV. "Come on Yeosang!" he shouted as Hongjoong and Yeosang joined in, Yeosang clutching the victory for the team.

a/n : how are we feeling today?? today is my birthday so I wanted to give a gift to everyone, I hope you all enjoy this chapter! and i will be working on 7 asap! qotd : when is your birthday?!!

𓍢ִ໋🌷͙֒ part 7 here.

[gravedigginbbydoll]

Hawkins University : The Munson Edition

AN: Hey y'all! I'm sorry for the brief hiatus, this past week has been insane. Working at a University is NOT FOR THE WEAK. I've been doing quite shit tbh (blame crazies and my job). Anyways, this chapter is a little sad (I'm so sorry, I swear there'll be comfort later). Anyways, I hope you enjoy! Also pls remember reblogs and comments are appreciated ! I love feedback!

→ cliches: friends to lovers, heavy use of nicknames instead of Y/N, we're all just struggling college kids, Music Tutor! Eddie, Resident Assistant! Reader, good girl x bad boy, instant connections, 'I don't trust most people but I trust you', 'are we friends or more?', and 'I can't believe you're such a slut that you have a special dtf drawer...'

→ warnings: mature topics, insecurity, hurt and comfort, drinking and drug usage, strong language, bullying, mental health, discussion of suicide and self harm, mature thoughts, eventual smut, minors dni

→ pairing: modern!college!eddie x college!fem!reader

<Previous Masterlist Next>

Chapter 6

Bugs POV 

It had been two weeks since your sleepover. You had found yourself staying over on weekends, you and Eddie falling into even more of a comfortability with one another. You both discussed everything under the sun, getting to know all the intricacies behind the other. You learned Eddie loved his tattoos and hated needles, how his family was really from nearby Hawkins but he often refused to go home due to his reputation in town. He let you know how he was the town pariah as an openly bisexual metalhead delinquent and how Hawkins was the first place he began to feel like himself. You learned he loved thrift stores and record shops, could live off of cereal and beer, and hated the smell of overly fruity vape juice (“If it fucking smells like a middle school girls locker room, why would you smoke it?”). You even learned that Eddie had a…reputation…on campus. You hadn’t heard about it until your American Government class, where the girl behind you (Christine?) had been giggling with her friends about the way the ‘punk guy who deals’ had fulfilled her ‘wildest dreams’. She went further into detail, but you tried to zone her out at that. 

Anyways, you decided to help Eddie out to face his fear of changing his major. Which led you here.

You were standing at the door of the Advising Office, Eddie fidgeting beside you. You could feel his anxiety rolling off of him in waves. Eddie was often an overthinker, but equipped at hiding it with putting on a show. He tended to not do so around you, though. You reached out gingerly, grabbing onto his elbow, the denim jacket he wore soft and worn from use against your hand. 

“Eds, it’ll be okay. I’ll be right here. I promise,” You softly whispered, eyes searching his face to try and get him to meet your gaze. 

His brown eyes met yours, full of worry as he gulped. He looked back towards the doors, shifting his weight from foot to foot. “I don’t know if I can do this, Bug. What if Wayne-” 

You cut him off with a light smack to his elbow, rolling your eyes playfully. “You specifically called Wayne to talk about this. I was there. He just wants you to be happy. I remember because you put him on speaker and I still could barely hear the man.”

Eddie sighed, nodding and huffing out a breath before he headed to the door, marching inside. You smiled, your heart squeezed softly in pride. Eddie had talked with you and leaned toward Music Therapy. He felt something tug him towards helping young kids through music, letting you in on a small bit of his own struggles. You were grateful and didn’t push, only being told that he had ‘gone through some mental distress’ last year, causing him to get put in inpatient for a bit, falling behind in classes. You recalled his face as he sat on his bed with you, strumming Sweetheart (his electric guitar) softly, voice shaky with emotion. 

“The only thing that called out to me was music. I just want to be there for people who feel the same way.”

You were snapped out of your thoughts as Eddie exited the office, face in a soft smile, eyes watery with tears. You rushed over, worry sinking in. 

“What happened? Is it too late to enter those classes? Eds, I-” 

“I filled out the application to switch over. She told me that it may take a few days, but because I was within the music department anyways, it wouldn’t be a difficult switch. I have to wait to take some of the courses, but I can drop my two Production courses without penalty,” He sighed softly, his tone full of relief as he looked down at you, blinking away tears before hastily pulling you into a hug. He squeezed you softly, mumbling thank yous into your hair, clear relief flooding into your system. Eddie was affectionate and loved touch, so you were glad he was feeling better. 

You squeezed back, heart soaring. 

Everything was going to be okay.

You stood in the local Rosa’s Costumes, the store filled to the brim with props and clothing. It was a favorite of the theater department at Hawkins and had been running for years. You and Eddie were among the clearly haunted prop items and section of the store that was for some reason themed as pirates. Eddie was perusing the hundreds of clothing and costumes on the aging racks, the familiar smell of Rosa’s incense wafting through the store. 

“I don’t think we should go as anything basic, because we are anything but,” Eddie stated cheekily, wiggling his brows over at you. 

You felt your stomach twist and turn as you plastered on a smile as best as you could. Eddie was referring to the Kappa Nu party that he had extended an invite to you to. You knew Eddie usually sold at parties and while it made you nervous (he had called you his favorite little square after you expressed concern), you were more anxious at the idea of being anywhere near the Kappa Nu house. You knew it boasted the hottest girls in Hawkins and it would be packed tight with bodies on Halloween night. 

You originally had a plan of doing what you always did with Eddie: renting a lot of campy horror movies and cuddling on the couch while drinking and Eddie would smoke, the two of you laughing at the practical effects. And then maybe after you’d head into town to see the local Ghost Walk that occasionally came through detailing all the spooky haunted places in town with an over the top narrator. 

But Eddie had burst into your study period at the library with Nancy, excitedly telling you about his success in his new courses and his ability to catch up. He called for a celebration as Nancy laughed and bid the two of you goodbye to head into work. Then he told you about getting an invitation to Kappa Nu, his eyes twinkling with excitement. And honestly…

How could you have said no to that face? 

So now you were here, in a theater kids wet dream of a store, thumbing through costumes to try and stumble upon an idea. Eddie was zipping up and down aisles, a pep in his step. He was recently more animated and less stressed, the clear joy from his new classes clear as day. It warmed your heart. 

Eddie grabbed your hand, walking briskly toward an aisle before turning to grin that megawatt smile at you. “I think I just had the perfect idea,” He gushed, turning back around to lead you with determination, clearly on a mission. 

You felt your heart race and face heat up as tingles ran up and down your arms. Eddie was unaware but your crush was carving and worming it’s way deeper into your heart, the affliction becoming harder to ignore. You tried to tell yourself that it was better this way, Eddie being too good of a friend to pass up. But every hug, every cuddle, and every warm cheek kiss led to more and more of an entanglement, your mind at war with your heart. 

Even Robin began to notice. You told her there was no way he would like you back, what with being Eddie, but she wouldn’t hear your excuses. She stated that it was clear that the two of you were ‘dumbass lovesick puppies’ who ‘couldn’t read the room worth shit’. You had finished the conversation at that, seeing a resident come up to the desk, and the last thing you needed was your hall gossiping about your romantic life or lack thereof. 

You were snapped out of your thoughts when Eddie let go of your hand, grabbing for a ridiculously large leather jacket with a huge collar, clearly meant as a biker or greaser costume. You cocked your head at Eddie, eyebrows furrowed while you fought back a smile. 

“What are you doing with that thing?” 

“We can go as The Driller Killer and an 80’s girl! From Slumber Party Massacre 2!,” Eddie said excitedly, his dimples appearing as his grin grew. 

You laughed a bit, shaking your head with a smile. Eddie would pick the campy serial killer who was based off of a greaser and had an electric guitar with a murdering drill on the neck. It was perfect. 

“Sure, why not?,” You laughed a bit as Eddie grabbed your hand immediately to drag you off in search of the other pieces. 

Maybe the party wouldn’t be so bad. 

You were standing on the front lawn of the large white mansion, knees shaky as you felt your stomach churn. Suddenly your makeup felt stupid and your clothes too tight. You tugged on the jean shorts and blue cropped t-shirt you wore, your body feeling as though it burst into flames. Eddie grabbed your hand, squeezing it and giving you a soft smile. 

“It’ll be okay, Bug,” He said softly. 

You looked up at him, his hair coiffed carefully with the rest back in a bun, his large ridiculous leather jacket and tight jeans still looking like a dream on him. He wore the fake cutout prop of the guitar drill slung on his back and some fake blood splatter across the thing. Even in his campy get up, and laughable oversized leather collar, he looked adorable. You pinched your own leg discreetly, trying to curb the feelings. 

You nodded up at him, squeezing his hands and turning to face the house once again, walking toward it. Once you entered, you felt your senses become overwhelmed. You saw flashing lights and a million bodies stuffed within the house. The smell of weed and alcohol along with perfume, cologne, sweat, and sugar lingered in the air, making your head spin. You felt the bass of the music playing inside vibrate through the floor, traveling through your bones almost. You clung to Eddie, feeling as if you’d either vomit or faint if you let go. Eddie rubbed your hand softly, leading you deeper inside to the kitchen, the room’s island filled with various bottles and bar piled high with boxes and cans of soda, Twisted Teas, Trulys, White Claws, a large plastic tub of bright pink alcohol brimming with fruit. Eddie grabbed a cup with ice and a coke can and the Jack Daniels bottle, quickly mixing up a Jack and Coke for you. He handed you the cup, your fingers brushing as you grabbed the sticky red plastic. Your heart sped up as your whole body felt a burst of heat and electricity. You tried to brush it off. 

“Thanks, Ed,” You shouted over the music as he nodded softly at you, a smile on his lips. 

You took a sip, determined to let loose and forget this impending tornado of feelings swirling in you. You could be calm. You could let go. 

Eddie grabbed himself a beer, smiling at you and pointing to turn your attention towards Robin and Steve, the two clearly already intoxicated. They were dressed like Doc Brown and Marty, Robin amusingly dressed as the doctor (though she had removed the wig and was twirling it in the air it seemed) and Steve dressed as Marty, puffer jacket and all. You laughed, waving at them. Robin waved, and elbowed Steve to wave back. 

Jonathan and Argyle appeared then, dressed as Cheech and Chong. Jonathan smiled at Eddie as Argyle nodded at the two of you. 

“Killer costumes, dudes. No one appreciates campy horror these days,” He mused, taking a sip of his soda. 

Jonathan furrowed his brows and shook his head, clearly not as aware of the reference to your costumes as Argyle. He was about to open his mouth when Steve and Robin came up. Steve slung his arm around Jonathan’s shoulder while holding his half empty cup in the other hand, grinning. 

“Wassup guys? I- I had a little too mu-much,” Steve hiccuped, grinning. 

You laughed softly, covering your mouth with your hand. Steve could be a bit of a worrywart and mother hen, so it was nice to see him let loose on these occasions. 

“Hey-hey….psst….Roomie!,” Steve frantically whispered to Eddie, causing Eddie to grin a bit. 

“Yes, roomie?,” Eddie teased, clearly keeping a mental note of the interaction to tease Steve for later. 

“I- I saw that hot girl you’ve been see-ing a bi-bit…here…She was over t-there,” Steve slurred, lifting a weak finger to point behind you. 

You felt your stomach churn. Eddie had been seeing someone? You knew he hooked up with plenty of people before but had put a pause on it for a bit. You looked up to Eddie out of the corner of your eye, seeing his face pale a bit as he faked a laugh, eyes guarded as he tried to change the subject. Was he hiding a girl from you? Something serious? Your heart raced as you felt as though a thorned vine wrapped around it, squeezing and puncturing it, your mind going through every scenario. 

While lost in your thoughts, Steve lost his footing and slipped from Jonathan's grip, losing his hold on his drink. The bright pink liquid mostly splattering on your shirt, making you come to your senses while also feeling anxiety bubble up and tears sting the back of your eyes,. 

“Oh-Oh Bu-bug I’m soo sorry, I-,” Steve blubbered, eyes wide in panic as he looked at you and you felt your walls come up. You needed to get out of here. 

“It’s okay. I’m just gonna go clean up,” You said softly to the group, eyes with a blank stare as you pushed through the crowd to go upstairs. 

You happened upon a miraculously empty bathroom, entering and wetting a towel while dabbing at the bright blue shirt, actions getting more frantic as your vision began to blur. You began to feel your hands shake as you sobbed softly, 

You were a fool. 

Girls like you didn’t get Eddie Munson. Girls like you didn’t get dates, period.  You studied and worked snitchy jobs and lost sleep over not pleasing people. You avoided new things and never stepped out of your comfort zone. You pinpointed every flaw in the mirror until it was all you could see. Boys like Eddie Munson knew nothing but kindness and courage, building a thick skin, and women pinning and giggling after them. Eddie Munson knew adventures and spontaneity, he knew dates with people and sudden hookups. Hell, he knew sorority girls. 

You leaned over the bathroom counter, the sobs wracking your body now as you lost control. You felt your insides twist and turn and pull. You were a lost cause. You couldn’t lose your friendship, but you felt the feelings pouring out of your skin and bones, shattering your insides. 

You sobbed more, scratching your throat raw, your whole body aching with pain. 

It hurt. Knowing you were not enough. 

You should’ve known it was coming, as it did always, but you felt it so deeply now that you wouldn’t soon forget. 

You sobbed until there were no more tears left, hands gripping the counter as you looked up to assess the damage. Your bright blue eyeshadow and liner were now muddy splotches on your face, swirling colors. You sighed, wetting the towel again, going to scrub off the evidence, your heart sinking. 

You’d have to put walls up. You wouldn’t give up Eddie. Just…be more realistic. 

You scrubbed until your face was rubbed raw and felt warm from all the friction of the scratchy guest bathroom towel, your mind and heart too fresh with pain to consider the germs. You splashed some water on your face before beginning to head down, 

You headed down the stairs when you spotted it in the dark corner of the crowded room.

Eddie. And a petite blonde.

She was giggling at something he said as they talked, her hand on his arm. She was dressed as a cheerleader, the costume clearly a real uniform from her days in high school. Eddie was speaking animatedly with her, clearly unaware of your current state. 

You raced down the stairs, dodging bodies as you zoomed past Argyle, barely hearing him call out as you rushed out the building, heading outside to the cold and lonely air. 

Fuck Halloween.

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