#feel free to discuss or ask questions

[just-aro]

y’know, I feel like the aro community is one of the only places I can talk about having queer attraction to men without it constantly being the butt of a joke.

I find it interesting that, while the broad a-spec community jokes about the concept of attraction, the majority of takes I see that poke fun at attraction are systemic rather than individual. I do see the takes on "I don't understand why someone would be attracted to xyz person", usually if the relationship is unhealthy, which I have many thoughts on (notably: please read any resource ever on helping people experiencing abuse), but...

I can say "yeah, I find men attractive in some form. sometimes sexual, sometimes in a way where all I know is that it isn't romantic", and I don't have to brace for a litany of "ew, you like men? rip, f in the chat" and similar sentiments. I've experienced more than a few explicitly queer irl spaces where queer attraction to men must be qualified with a statement about how it's terrible, actually because men are terrible, and it's exhausting. I just want to talk about being queer with other queer people without feeling like i'm walking through a minefield of useless radfem rhetoric that portrays all men as inherently, intrinsically "bad", and my attraction to them as low-key problematic (and honestly, the homophobic history of that... is immense).

I'm not going anywhere too specific with this, but it's just... interesting. i'm not sure if this is something where I've curated my experience with aros online to avoid that nonsense in ways I can't do irl, or if it's an actual phenomena. i just know that i'm far from the only irl queer person I know who experiences attraction to men and feels like we're expected to self-deprecate about it or be told we're ruining others' fun.

[shmorp-mcdurgen]

PROJECT: FREEMAN AU

Okay so I already made a post explaining this au a while back, but it recently got a rewrite so I'm gonna go over it again, in a bit more detail this time, so bear with me

Project: Freeman is an au that takes place in a timeline where the resonance cascade never happened, and Black Mesa is instead focusing not just on teleportation technology and studying Xen, but also finding ways to utilize Xen pools and the micro-organisms inside that are proven to have healing properties. Thus, they spend a lot of their time and funding on experimentation on both Xen animals and human beings, studying how the Xen organisms will heal damaged tissue.

(full explanation below since this might get a little long)

After multiple failed tests, they get a new mysterious sponsor, one promising full funding if they do one more test to prove the technology is worthwhile, and Black Mesa begins work on a new HEV suit to utilize it, fitted specifically for the use of Gordon Freeman, unaware he's even taking part in a test of any kind.

After a while, the suit does it's job, healing any and all wounds inflicted on Freeman due to the Xen Micro-Organisms being introduced into the system whenever he is harmed. One test even results in Gordon's death, and he is still resurrected using the suit.

However after that test, the Sponsor was not satisfied, and ordered for a month-long endurance test on the suit, being used non-stop for an extended period of time with various methods of both harm and death used to see how long the suit can keep Freeman alive. After a few days, the suit began to show signs of wear, healing wounds incorrectly and at a rate that seemed more harmful that helpful, all while Gordon is still unaware of what is causing it all.

After that, the suit malfunctioned, causing itself to fuse to Freeman's body, unable to be removed or have its life support systems shut off, leaving Gordon to mutate and deteriorate without a way to get help.

Despite the fact the test was a clear failure, the Sponsor pressured Black Mesa's Administrator to continue until the full month was over, leaving Gordon a pawn to a continuous and agonizing test, unclear when it will end, all while he begins to suspect the ones "helping him" aren't there to help him at all.

[sporco-filth]

thanks for answering all my questions, I love hearing you elaborate on the details which does bring me to my follow up question, how are the jobs like in Slob City? I imagine that the deadlines are really slack or just don't exist. That and those too lazy to work or just prefer to be NEETs are supported somehow?

I'm going to be honest, I haven't put thought into this solely because I think it would not be possible for the economy of the city to sustain itself if nobody at all is really working and so it just exists in a vague state of 'it works somehow' and I don't question it.

I assume they have really good welfare so people don't necessarily need to work. I feel like the unemployment rate is really high.

A lot of jobs we'd consider essential (e.g. waste management) just aren't performed and others (e.g. electricity production) are done outside of the city. I guess when you think about it, what sort of jobs would need to be done? Other than restaurants, supermarkets, government stuff, real estate/construction and other retail stuff, there probably wouldn't be a whole lot of things. So as long as some people are employed so that the government gets taxes and the retailers get money to buy more stock, people can do whatever job they want, even if it's 'unproductive' by our standards.

But for people who do work, there are literally no expectations or whatever. It's impressive enough that you showed up to work. if anything, people who work hard are looked down on or mocked because they could be spending their time trying to minimise the effort they need to complete the job to a barely acceptable standard. Below standard is already too high. there's no desire to climb the career ladder (except if it leads to a cushier job), so people only want enough money to buy food and stuff. Not having to work is the dream and so people who get to lounge around at home all day are envied.

I don't know, maybe the city is right next to huge oil reserves and just gets money off of that or something, so no one needs to pay taxes. The point is, there's no pressure to work if you don't want to.

I assume there are schools as well and the same sort of principles apply in that like a real world C is the equivalent of their A+.

[ofliterarynature]

Booklr, your LGBTQ+ book club recs please!

What are your favorite backlist, underrated, or obscure LGBTQ+ reads? The more diverse the better!

I’m part of a patron-led LGBTQ+ bookclub at one of my local libraries, and after a full year our book list is in need of a refresh. I’ve proven very bad at helping with this, as I’ve either read all the things or am too impatient to wait for it to get picked, lol.

The group is 18+ and open to all genres, but we are specifically NOT looking for YA, romance novels, or books with lots of queer trauma. Self-pub is also out for library-access reasons. Some of our favorite picks so far were My Volcano, Genderqueer, The Song of Achilles, and The Heartbreak Bakery. It doesn’t need to be a 4-5 star read, as long as it can foster good discussion!

[rivalkieran]

SOLISVERSE CHANGELOG (uhm atleast from what I remember Not posting on here)

fleshed out the worldbuilding surrounding pokemon battles more (champion culture, battle as an art, battle as a cultural phenomenon, etc.)

made more dynamics of all varieties more fucked up (notably: ethan/silver, elitechampfour, alola friends, paldea friends) (also kinda the johtags?? they were already fucked up before I guess there's more emphasis on it now though)

ethan dies. for reasons. but hes fine (physically) (mentally still up for debate) via ho-oh shenanigans

victor is an egg. he still is actually as of the 'current' era of solisverse. estrogen could've saved her.

also solisverse has canonical years now! kanto plot happens in 2007 and 'current' time is around 2023 although I've been playing w moving it up to 2030 due to fun plotstuff happening around that time

[okiedokiegoosey]

theories w/ rocki bc @caterva told me to put it on the dash:

today's edition: cooper howard is not a naturally occurring ghoul.

i am pointedly putting this on lucy and not barb because we're going to talk about how it affects lucy and cooper's interactions. i may expand upon it on barb later. under the cut bc i am long winded and do not want to clog your dash with my cooper was an experiment theory.

disclaimer: these are my thoughts and opinions and that's it. they aren't law. do not have to apply to anyone. they're just here as thoughts and theories. that's it.

let's discuss how cooper howard is nothing like a naturally occurring ghoul in the fallout universe.

the first time we meet the ghoul, he's in the ground, and he's let up every year by dom pedro, but he's hooked to the same chem that's in the vials via iv. this directly goes against the general knowledge of natural ghouls being a. highly chem resistant and b. able to go on for at least a few decades without intervention for turning feral. it's important to note that todd howard himself said the show was canon, so that means game lore is in play here.

he called himself a bucket of drugs, which also, doesn't make sense to a naturally occurring ghoul or his personal character motives and development to that point. chem addiction itself is not uncommon in the fallout universe, but if we take his character as a whole. he takes it as it comes, he's a bucket of drugs. we see no indication in his supply that it's a chem addiction. hancock had a chem addiction that started his ghoulification. howard? yeah. no way.

and we have to consider how close he was to the memories of his past life after two hundred years and what he says about torture to lucy. he strung her up and lucy immediately dived into her own memories and personal mission to make him see reason. he immediately brings up studies, and if you look at his face, you can see a whole play of emotions before he said anything. that points in the direction of him having been where she was at some point. on the receiving end of what he perceived as torture.

so, let's say he was an experiment and not the product of continued radiation exposure. that also explains why his reaction was SO BIG to lucy smashing his supply. There is something inherently wrong with his regeneration and degeneration rates to need support beyond maybe radaway/radx on occasion to keep the radiation at a healthier rate? If the radiation were that bad, for him to need chem support so frequently, people would be dropping like flies due to the radiation. we don't see any evidence of that.

in theory, there's more than enough evidence to say he was tested on in a vault (hence why he knew at least janey made it in to one and not where she went after) and he likely wasn't the most willing to go in but did it for his daughter (dad of the century. take notes hank). If they'd separated them under the guise of protocol, he likely would've been more receptive to letting janey go before they went to night night sleep. it would also explain why he asks where the hell they are, because he knows for a fact at least janey is in a vault and likely trusts barb followed her own plan and went in one, too (more on that later. on barb). yes, he hated vault tec. that isn't up for debate. what is up for debate is how far he went to protect his daughter. his memory of where he knew she should be is too clear to indicate he was knocked out at any point. he knows they're in the vaults. that part he doesn't debate. he wouldn't know that unless he put janey in one himself. it would be more likely that he assumed at least she died.

now, what does this have to do with lucy? i'd be kinda hostile if i saw someone in a vault tec suit and i was their pet project, too. let's be clear about that. It's how he tells her he's her and to give it time is what I want to draw on first. we assume he means physically given the constant callback to her checking her radiation levels, but consider he meant mentally. that he too was a product of their design and look at how he turned out. he'd already called it quits with vault tec before the drop to think that kept him bitter. something in what we didn't see has his ire for them even higher.

plus, the name maclean would've triggered some memory. moldaver, too. we saw that. we know he's got a good grip on his mind (another reason the constant chem recall makes no sense in the grand scheme of things). i truly think his initial motive with lucy was to fuck with her because of her connection to vault tec. it was luck and chance she was useful to his personal mission, at least in the beginning.

let's put this naive (not dumb unless it's street smarts, in which she has no experience) girl in front of someone who has been through hell and back and still just wants to find her family. You see he's still capable of humanity (which goes against him being on the edge of turning feral too) because he does, in a way take responsibility for her, covers for her, and at least invites her along later.

nothing about this is to say the relationship can't turn romantic, okay? we aren't discussing that. if you want that for what you're writing, go for it. the room for interpretation is a beautiful thing, but at the very least, he cares enough about her to help her see her mission through to the end, too.

we aren't even going to mention the ghoul organs for sale which really wouldn't do anyone any good unless they're for science and research, which feeds back into the logic that someone is running experiments.

AGAIN ROCKI; TL;DR: all of this is to say that there are inconsistencies in the lore we know about ghouls and cooper howard to say he was a naturally occurring ghoul. his chem dependence leads to inaccuracies of his own cognitive function, and he was likely experimented on. it also explains why dom pedro kept him as he did in it's own way. his chem dependence also makes him unique in terms of a ghoul, and it's my theory that vault tec made him the way that he is.

[untiliendupdnf]

My Opinion

Feel free to ignore, I'm just going to have a little rant.

So, like I said, I wanted to wait before writing up any conclusions to this whole situation in the event anything else would be added and I think with George’s video I think we’ve reached that point. I’m aware Caiti has said she’s going to stream again but realistically she’s been so incredibly unreliable when recounting these events that I honestly don’t find it necessary to watch. That may sound mean but the truth of the matter is she has lied, whether it was through omission, stretching the facts or straight up fabricating messages the reality is she made the decision to turn this into something it wasn’t. At this point the only worthwhile addition she could make is whether or not she accepts George’s apology but that’s none of mine damn business and her forgiving him has no relevance to my opinion on George. It would be nice to know that both parties got some closure from the whole thing but it really doesn’t affect my consumption or creation of content.

With that out of the way I think the first thing I want to say is the “believe all victims” rhetoric has been twisted far beyond the point of being logical or helpful, especially in the social media landscape.  In my opinion believe all victims should apply to victims and victims only. By that I mean if your friend tells you she was raped or assaulted or abused then you believe them 100%. If you watch a streamer and they talk about an experience they had then again, believe them. But once fingers have been pointed then that belief has to be supported by facts.

Saying I was raped and asking to be believed is entirely different to saying I was raped and then naming or alluding to a person. There’s no reason to dismiss me if I just inform you of something tragic happening to me but if I then tell you it was done by, let’s say Obama, then you can no longer just accept that with no proof.

With regards to this situation, I believe in Caiti’s hurt and her feelings but I can’t in good conscience allow her emotional reaction to colour my logical one. She was made to feel uncomfortable and that sucks but her framing of this story has been highly exaggerated and honestly kind of manipulative. Now I don’t know anything about her but just like she’s allowed to feel how she feels I’m allowed to feel how I feel and as a victim the walk back that’s happened from that first stream has me feeling manipulated. Words were used with a specific intent and it’s honestly made me feel like my own trauma has been mocked so I’m sorry if my sympathy is lacking towards her.

George is a 27-year-old man, 26 at the time and I think he’s shown himself to be incredibly immature in this situation and showed a real lack of thought going in to this. Too much time thinking with his dick and not enough with his head. There’s no excuse for him not verifying ages and since he apparently lost his virginity at 19, he’s had plenty of time to learn this. I also think given the reality of the landscape at the time with the allegations it was foolish for them to invite them up to a hotel room in the first place. Sex isn’t a need to survive, if they were horny, they should’ve just fucked each other and saved us being dragged into this situation. I don’t see any of this as malicious so I’m fine with giving my support still but they really need to focus up and stop being basic white men. Put a little more effort in.

As for Caiti’s friends. 10000000000000% they did this on purpose and Dream was right to say so in his Reddit post and I’ll die on that hill. Caiti needs to invest in better friends because these ones are not it.

[mtt-burger-emporium]

thinking about chara and the implications of the line "chara hated humanity. why, they never said..." like ok i KNOW something was happening at home. chara baby you didn't deserve that shit i'm so glad you fell down a thousand feet in a cave hole and right into the arms of people who would keep you fed roof over your head and would never raise their hand against you. "eradicate humanity" you're 10 years old how about eradicating your shitfucked surface fam by calling cps first

[a-ramblinrose]

JOMP BPC || January 1 || Reading Goals:

To slow down. The last few years I've noticed that I was paying more attention to number goals and aesthetic books stacks at the end of every month instead having fun with fiction or learning something from nonfiction. I wasn't sitting in wonder with poetry or lingering on comic art. I want my reading to be about the books, the story, the words painting their pictures in my imagination! Reading is joy and it's time I remembered that!

[sherlockgracie]

The Wizard Spite

(The Wizard, The Witch, And The Wild One Original Character)

The Wizard Spite, an illusionist of The Citadel. When he chose his name cloak, it was not due to his feelings towards the world around him in the current, but more so to how he wanted to feel eventually. An illusionist of the Citadel has little use outside of psychological warfare. But at the core of an illusion is creativity. If you can't imagine what you want to create, then your illusions have no substance. A Minor Illusion is the most basic of cantrips, and really only used to clean up minor details that you don't need to bother with. But only an illusionists would include shading The Wizard Spite showed immense aptitude for learning and memorization. Being able to look at a page of incantations and see it clearly in his mind caused him to get noticed quickly. Passing the required tests, he began tracks to become a wizard. Though it was often noted that he would take notes on the Faunaloges more than the magic theory. His notebooks contained writings and minor sketches of people and objects. Their movements and idiosyncrasies, the clothes and light. Spite assumed he had to be a wizard. It's something people of Citadel aspired to, and what his parents recommended to him. If he is able to, then he should. He didn't know what else he wanted to be either. So becoming a Wizard felt right. When it came time for him to pick a specialization and track, he tried for Conjuration. He hoped that conjuring things would allow him to gain a better understanding of the mechanics of physiology. Though the magical theory around Conjuration ended up not being for him, and he was transferred over to an Illusionist track, one not sought out by many.

An illusionist has two goals when they are casting their spells. 1) To Deceive, Distract, and/or Entertain their target(s). 2) To Study, Analyze, and Observe their Target(s). An illusion's effectiveness increases with knowledge of the target.

Spite knew how to watch people, when he was with his friends he found his mind wandering to how their mouths moved as they spoke, or how eyes move. Those subtle differences in how people react to things is what Spite was best at. In the year he would get his Name Cloak, he initially was going to become The Wizard Scrutinize. Though he then found out exactly what Illusionist do in and outside the Citadel. Fear is a powerful tool, and is held in the Empire's hand. Not often are they called upon to do so, but sometimes a Wizard that has stepped to far out of line needs to have zipped lips. Enchanters and their abilities to Modify memories can only last so long. But the image of their world burning around them lasts forever. He accidentally found this information out, though he wasn't as shaken as he might've thought he would be. After all, this is what he has been trained to do so far, and more yet to come. He knew this was right, wizards are defined by their secrets. If the Citadel let all Wizards and Soldiers speak so freely, then how quickly might everything crumble? When he stood their and chose Spite as his Name Cloak, the meaning was not directed at the world around him, but at the person he would become. Hatred directed towards his future self for what he will do for his Empire. The Wizard Spite lives alone, a man known for his bitterness more than anything else. Once a great artist and entertainer in his 20's, now a drained and bleak individual in his 50's.

[1wn8ure]

making it through life with benchtrio clenched in both fists

[itschesshire]

Hello Tumblr, I once again have thoughts about Inscryption.

So, as we know, the characters in the game technically don’t have “voices”. They make sounds, but they don’t talk. I was thinking; what if they simply didn’t have voices at all? Like, they physically don’t talk.

I always think of the world in terms of my envisioning of it. I have a Challenger OC, and hand in hand with that I have an AU. Within that, when you play, you get sucked directly into the game itself and play it out as if you yourself are part of it. So, all that to help explain my thoughts.

If you were a Challenger in the game, the way they talk (conceptually) wouldn’t change from how we see it in the actual gameplay. You wouldn’t hear their voice, just the noises they make, but like us being able to read the captions to know what they’re saying without them actually speaking words, the Challenger within the game would just kinda, understand them? Just know what they’re trying to say, y’know?

Does this make sense at all??

[forest-hashira]

Dragon Powers

AU POSTING HOURS AGAIN!!! this time you all will be learning the powers each dragon has. I don't have powers assigned to every dragon yet bc i'm a little obsessive when it comes to making a good match but this post will include all the dragons that do! next post will probably be the names of all the named dragon so far, so be on the lookout for that this weekend!

before i get started, when i say "powers" i mean an element a given dragon has a certain amount of control over, usually in the form of being able to spit/breathe whatever element it is but i will include any other important info. if this is still confusing just lmk and i can try to elaborate more! just know that i do plan to explore the range/limits of each dragon's powers in the actual fic by showing them in action. that being said, here is what i've got so far!

Note: pronouns will refer mostly to the dragons themselves. I will refer to the riders by name

Satoru's dragon's power is ice. This means he is comfortable even in freezing weather in a way most other dragons are not, and is generally resistant to/happy in the cold & snow. He is also the fastest dragon over long distances.

Suguru's dragon's power is wind. He is capable of creating strong gusts and even vortexes (like tornadoes) with his mouth or with the movement of his body. He has the best endurance of any of the dragons in this AU.

Reader's dragon's powers are unknown. Very little about metallic dragons is fully understood, and she has yet to demonstrate power over any particular element. She is faster than Satoru's dragon in short bursts (anywhere from 5-15 minutes, depending on weather & other factors). She is also the largest dragon in the settlement, which gives her a slight advantage over them when it comes to strength.

Yuji's dragon's power is fire. Nearly all dragons are resistant to burns to a certain extent (though ice dragons like Satoru's are the most susceptible), but being able to breathe fire means that she is completely immune to burns.

Nobara's dragon's power is lightning. She can both create & direct lightning bolts, and any lightning bolts she creates are accompanied by a clap of thunder, just like real lightning. However, this does mean that she is frequently surrounded by excess energy and is prone to give people intense static shocks if she's touched (even Nobara, sometimes).

Maki's dragon does not have a power. Despite this, he is the fastest and strongest multi color dragon in this au. His agility both on the ground and in the air is unmatched (most dragons are only very agile in one or the other).

Toge's dragon can manipulate sound waves. Mostly this looks like her amplifying her cries/shrieks to the point that they can shatter glass and burst eardrums from their volume and/or frequency.

DISCLAIMER HERE BECAUSE BEYOND THIS IS DISCUSSION OF THE CURSES' DRAGONS

Sukuna's dragons powers are poison and fire. Like Yuji's dragon, this makes him immune to burns, but with the added immunity to virtually all types of poisons, especially airborne poisons. His poisonous fumes are also flammable. His strength is well above most other dragons.

Kenjaku's dragon's power is wind. His abilities are the same as Suguru's dragon, but his endurance is not as high as Suguru's dragon's endurance.

Mahito's dragon's power is acid. He is not immune to burns, like Yuji's and Sukuna's dragons, but his resistance is higher than most other dragons. His resistance to poison is similarly heightened, but he is not immune. His agility is heightened, almost on the same level as Maki's dragon.

This is all I have so far! anyone who was mentioned in any of the previous posts as having a role in this AU who is not in this post does not yet have a power assigned to their dragon. I will update this post accordingly as other dragons are assigned powers.

[storiesoflilies]

HIIIIIIII LILY MY LOVE!!!!!!

soooo. i am here to talk about 'as we fall, time is broken.' because. WOW

(preemptive apology bc i'm typing this on my computer so i just know it's gonna be long teehee)

first of all, it was an incredible read. i was literally in awe the entire time. like i would consider this a magnum opus of sorts. i would frame this if i could

[also for anyone reading this HUGEEE spoiler warnings for this piece ahead teehee]

okay a few themes i just wanted to pick apart and talk/think about:

the 'first woman' warnings - i LOVED this idea, the little inserts of the past. the idea of passing knowledge forward, knowing what happens, trying to protect someone from your own fate. but also knowing that she cannot learn from verbal warnings; she must learn from experience. the need to live dooms her

running vs protecting - we see toji run when people come to the ship, and our dear reader gets hurt, devastatingly so. even if he wasn't there, he heals her at the end. and yet, at the true end, he's not there, because he knows he would die in the process. i was just left wondering why: the obvious answer is that he's selfishly protecting his own life above someone else's, that he never loved her in a way that could change him. but yet, i was still thinking if he thought, even for a moment, that in allowing himself to continue living, that he was in fact protecting our reader. he knew she cared about him, perhaps more than herself. she would sacrifice herself for him. if he died for her, would she forgive herself? would she be happy?

pride - there are very few instances where we see toji be proud of our reader. at first, i fell head over heals with the line "was it disgust or pride that was making his lips curl?" and then, when he allows her to drink his blood to heal her, there's this question of if the look in his eyes is pride. and finally, at the end. when he's watching and choosing not to intervene, and there's the question of "would toji be proud of her in this moment, as he had been when she defended him all those years ago?...he had to be." because, again, she was saving him. it makes me wonder what truly makes toji proud - is it her sacrifice? but then, why would he be proud when he saves her? was he, too, not sacrificing something in giving a piece of himself to heal her? idk idk idk and just the dichotomy of pride and disgust and AAAHHH idk what to do with this will have to think

this is less of a theme and more just i love him asking for forgiveness in japanese (with the caveat that my japanese is HORRIBLY rusty but that was the sense i got), but in the sense that it's a plea, truly an ask, more than just an "i'm sorry." idk it just felt like, for a moment, he was truly asking something of her (as if she would not do it; as if she would not do anything for him)

aaaAAAHHH once again apologies this got so long and it's mostly just nonsense HAHAHAHAHA but i absolutely adored reading this and thinking about it and thank you for writing it and i love you!!!!!!!!!

WAHHHH QUINN MY DARLING I WAS SOSOSOSOSOS HAPPY TO SEE A LONG REVIEW ON THE FIC IN MY INBOX YOU HAVE NO IDEA!!!!!

NEVER APOLOGIZE FOR A LONG REVIEW I LOVE THIS SO MUCH!!!!

and omg my magnum opus????? YOU ARE SO FUCKING NICE TO ME ILYSM MWAH MWAH MWAN <33333

discussion under the cut xo

to be honest, i absolutely adore reading what you think and have interpreted in this fic. as i’ve mentioned in previous asks, there are no right or wrong answers here. especially for part one and part three of your review. the ‘first woman’ is very much up to interpretation for who you think it is! it could be the reader, or someone else :3

part 2 is sooooooo delicious!! the way you think toji did not help her in the end to preserve himself because he thought she could never be happy in a world without him????!!!! SO DELISHHHHH MHMMMM I LIKE THIS ALOT!!!!

for part 4, as i said to a nonie in a previous ask, is that it might be toji who asked for forgiveness, and it might not be either hehehehe ;))))

much love,

Lily xo

[berryunho]

on seonghwa

this is just 800 words of me rambling about seonghwa (and a little hongjoong) in the answer so feel free to ignore or read for a glimpse into his noggin but there are... minor ??? spoilers lol i don't really think they're spoilers which is why im fine sharing them but ANYWAYS yeah beware ig ...

and shoutout bffie @mintsang this is for you don't yell at me when you read it <333333

ANYWAYS:

listen. seonghwa is so devoted to hongjoong because he feels responsible for him. when they first met seonghwa thought hongjoong was just some poor kid being beat by his parents and he decided that he would make sure that hongjoong didn’t die or go to jail or flunk out of school as long as they were friends. and at first of course hongjoong was quite… tame… w his personality shall we say so seonghwa really had no idea what the fuck he was getting into w him. and anyways by the time he put two and two together and realized that, ‘oh, maybe hongjoong is the problem!’ it was waaaayyyyy too late. like… he feels almost responsible for everything getting out of hand bc he definitely could’ve stopped him at some point but didn’t because he couldn’t bear hongjoong telling him to go or not wanting him at his side anymore so he just kept his mouth shut even as things got worse and worse. 

like seonghwa was a very normal and rational person before hongjoong got his talons into him. and this still haunts him. seonghwa really does mourn the loss of his innocence but… at the same time… he wouldn’t go back to change anything if he could. because he loves hongjoong. even knowing that hongjoong has only ever used him for his own gain and even knowing that hongjoong is like a textbook abuser he can’t make himself regret anything that he’s ever done for him. because he will always remember what it felt like to be that 14 year old boy watching his friend be rejected by everyone else and the feeling that he was the only one that could care enough to stay w him. and seonghwa knows its stupid but he’s scared that one day everything will fall apart for hongjoong and if he’s not there for it hongjoong simply won’t survive. 

so even though he knows hongjoong only wants him for selfish reasons he’s okay w that so long as hongjoong wants him somehow. and this is where our dear mc comes in. on one hand seonghwa is obviously jealous that hongjoong suddenly has someone else to give his freaky ass microscopic focus to. and on the other he’s pissed that she won’t just give hongjoong want he wants (even if what hongjoong wants is the opposite of what he wants). and on the other he’s scared FOR her bc no matter how strong she seems he’s sure that she’ll break to him eventually and seonghwa really doesn’t want to see what happened to himself happen again in another person. and on the other (4 hands is the normal amount idk what you’re talking about) he’s confusingly into her and he can’t understand why or how but he suspects its the fact that she’s also being subjected to the same. essentially torture. that is hongjoong’s desire/manipulation/whatever and he feels oddly connected to her…

so i wouldn’t say seonghwa hates mc nor does he really care about her he just is very conflicted about her and doesn’t know whether to be cold for his own sake or if he should be trying to get closer w her because this is really his first opportunity to have someone that understands hongjoong with him.

and anyways yeah even if seonghwa wanted to leave (he doesn’t) he wouldn’t because he feels responsible for hongjoong’s wellbeing (even though he knows this is foolish). and yeah maybe this is a bombshell or whatever but seonghwa couldn’t care less about the cult shit he’s just happy that hongjoong is happy and safe and not out in the real world wreaking havoc where he could get his ass caught a million times faster. so seonghwa deals with it to keep the situation somewhat under control for hongjoong’s sake. and while he’s not a fan of the crimes and the murder he also doesn’t particularly care either because he would do anything to keep hongjoong safe and he already thinks of himself as a lost cause anyhow. 

and this might be bold but here’s a little something on hongjoong too. hongjoong… is attached to seonghwa shall we say. like he never meant to be and he hates that he cares even a little bit so he keeps that shit on LOCK. as we’ve discussed he doesn’t love seonghwa bc he straight up cannot but if seonghwa decided to pack his shit and leave hongjoong WOULD be affected and he’d try to stop him duh but would he actually be able to kill him. probably not. so ANYWAYS hongjoong is a freak about mc for so many reasons but part of it is that he’s horrified (more so pissed) by the fact that he suddenly cares about someone and is desperate to prove to himself that he can control someone at a personal level without getting attached to them. which. we’ll see. LOL

SO YEAH THAT’S SEONGHWA! i could probably write an entire ass prequel about hongjoong and seonghwa and damn maybe i will but lol a lot of this will be clarified/expanded on in interims in the future but i litcherally cannot stop thinking about this rn so TAKE IT !!

[desertsportshipping]

Made the executive decision to pin my post explaining that I generally age Wes up, and that most of my doodles happen 3 to 5 years after Colosseum's post game.

It's a little bit old, so as it stands right now: Sword and Shield events happen concurrently to Gale of Darkness. There's obviously about a year timespan before that where Leon and Wes’s relationship develop, but the point stands that he is an adult.

As a side note, Wes's age of seventeen is stated in ONE developer's interview, which is in the murky grey area of "maybe canon." It's regarded as confirmed by people because it's the only age we get for him ever (Rip Orre), but it's absolutely not, and fan artists or writers can change it however they please for their own stories.