Sidelined AU Info Post
Alright, I guess we're doing this
CWs: mentions of internalized ableism, struggles with mental health
Timeline:
all of S1 is the same as in canon up until End Game
however, after Splinter turns over the helmet to Draxum, Draxum does not put on the armor, but chooses to put Leo inside instead, realizing that whoever goes in will probably have something horrible happen to them. that's detailed in this fic
unlike Draxum, who gets spit out of the armor immediately, Leo ends up trapped inside. from Leo's perspective, he is only vaguely aware of what's happening outside (it's a bit sunken place-ish, with him seeing snatches of events like through a grainy television), and he has only small amounts of influence over what the armor does
once Feral Shredder is on the loose, he pretty immediately starts destroying the Hidden City. Draxum realizes that he has inadvertently released a great evil on his people, the exact opposite of what he wanted, and he turns to the Hamatos to help him stop it. obviously they don't want to work with Draxum, but they have to get Leo back so they take the help
it takes them two days, during which the Shredder moves up to start terrorizing New York as well, but eventually they get him subdued. I'm not 100% on what goes down yet or whether Big Mama gets involved (I'm leaning toward not), but Leo fighting from the inside is a big help
Leo is removed from the armor and is in really bad physical shape; meanwhile the Shredder is subdued for now. in the immediate aftermath, the Foot Clan manages to get ahold of the Shredder and take off with him
he's too weak to do anything immediately but he is very much a Looming Threat the family is aware of
Draxum leaves for awhile at this point because none of them want him around and seeing Leo in the aftermath did wake him up to "oh yeah that's just a kid and I did that to him," also he's feeling real bad about that whole "accidentally almost destroying the yokai and also maybe the world" thing
meanwhile, Leo is severely weakened, but there's not anything that the family can do to hasten his recovery. they can only get him hooked up to an IV for fluids and nutrients and wait
it takes Leo a few days to become fully lucid again; during that time he tries to fight anyone around him off or sometimes pushes his family away to "protect" them
eventually Leo does regain lucidity, he tells everyone he's fine but he's Super Depressed. he's also lost his mystic powers completely.
Splinter also retreats a bit at this point, because he feels guilt for handing the helmet over to Draxum instead of trying to find a different way to rescue his boys, which isn't a great thing for him to do but his mental health is also not doing very well (someone get these guys some therapy)
in the meantime the bros and April manage the best they can, they all have different approaches but I'll go into detail about that in the next section
there's no treatment for Leo's condition outside the most boring one: time, exercise, and diet. unsurprisingly he hates this
Healing Bad Times abound, as shown in this fic
eventually the boys have to go out on a mission again. Leo, feeling useless, listens in on the comms from the lair, and ends up catching something the other boys' missed, meaning he's able to save them from a trap or something idk exactly what the point is he makes himself useful
this opens up a new path for Leo, one his brothers very heavily encourage
with a new goal in mind, Leo starts taking a lot better care of himself, actually following his physical therapy routine, spending time gaining new skills, and accepting help in the form of mobility aids. his physical and mental health both start making big improvements
this also helps his dad's mental health, everyone is doing better even if things aren't perfect
Donnie builds Leo a command center modeled after the bridge of Jupiter Jim's ship, he absolutely loves it. whenever the boys+April are on missions, Leo is in his command center helping from the background
eventually Leo has gotten to the point where he has enough strength for day to day life most of the time, he still isn't fighting baddies on rooftops but he can get to a store and back without collapsing on a good day and that's pretty good!
the Foot Clan has been a much bigger threat in this version of S2 and it's clear they're up to something big
of course right when Leo is starting to feel stable and happy again, that's when they launch their final attack
a lot of the finale events go down similarly to how they do in canon, minus Battle Nexus New York. they get Karai back but then she dies, Shredder destroys their home (including Leo's command center :c ), everything is Bad
Leo gets his mystic powers back the same way his brothers do, though he needs a little bit of an extra helping nudge from April/Karai, since he didn't think that was a thing he could still do
everyone getting their mystic powers is emotional but it's especially emotional for Leo. he didn't even know what ninpo was before today, but he knew after the Shredder it was like some part of his soul got locked away, and now that he can feel it again he finally feels whole
it gives him a burst of adrenaline so he can participate in the fight, though he doesn't do much of the actual battling, instead getting his bros where they need to be for the big hits (I mean this is basically what he does anyway haha)
it takes Donnie exactly .02 seconds to figure out how to use his own mystic powers to support Leo physically so that helps
after this, Leo becomes a more constant part of the team in the field, though he still primarily works as support and only gets into direct fights when he feels like he has to
instead of being made leader like in canon, Leo and Raph become co-leaders. Leo's own leadership abilities have improved massively, but Raph has more experience in the field, so having the two of them working together means they cover each other's blind spots, and the division of labor is less stressful for both of them
since Leo's already been through his character development and this tension is gone the movie events play out totally differently but I haven't gotten that far yet lol. I'm sure the apocalypse still happens somehow, though, I'd hate to lose Casey Jr
happy ending whooo
Relationships
Raph
Raph feels a lot of guilt about what happened to Leo; he was supposed to protect his little brothers and he didn't, and now one of them has permanent physical disabilities as a result. add to that it was Raph's idea to be heroes in the first place and yeah... he's not doing great
because of this guilt, Raph's instinct is to essentially baby Leo - he wants to take care of his every need as soon as it arises. this makes Leo feel stifled and infantilized, and drives a wedge in their relationship (the same one Raph is driving between himself and Mikey, in fact)
his and Donnie's distinctly different approaches to the situation also mean that they get into arguments often and can't really deal with being around each other, leaving Raph feeling isolated at the start (and thus pouring more attention and effort into Leo, which compounds the problem)
Raph dealing with his own guilt and trying to find the balance between helping Leo while also respecting his need for independence, boundaries, and dignity is a big part of his journey in the AU, and it also improves his relationship with Mikey and Donnie as he gets better at those skills
Donnie
Donnie is not dealing well with the fact that there's nothing to fix. they can only be patient and work incrementally to improve Leo's condition
he distracts himself by putting all his energy into making the lair accessible for Leo, building him mobility aids and doing everything he can to help
he also has a hard time understanding why Leo won't do the things that will help him (at first), because doesn't he just want things to go back to normal? doesn't he want to help himself? why won't he just do what he obviously has to do, Donnie does not understand
Leo is deep in denial at first, and he feels like he breaks down and starts doing physical therapy and using mobility aids and doing basically any of the things that will help him, that means it's not going to magically get better, it's going to take time and effort and it will probably never be fixed, just improved, and he hates that so much he's choosing to treat this like a temporary cold or flu that will blow over any day now
Donnie doesn't understand that so he takes Leo's refusal as a rejection and animosity abounds!
breakdowns and admissions of feelings will eventually happen
Donnie and Leo together come to grips with the idea that there is no fixing this and there is no return to how things were before but they can work toward a new normal that's just as good
Mikey
this one is a little bit too big for Dr. Delicate Touch and Dr. Feelings
Mikey tries, but he is just a kid, and with their dad emotionally retreating too there's just too many feelings for him to deal with on his own
he's gonna play family therapist until he breaks
he's frustrated because he can see what each of his brothers need to do to feel better but they just! won't! they won't do it, and he doesn't know how to make them
he's really stressed
it's Mikey that realizes that Leo needs goals to work toward to get himself motivated to take care of himself, and it's Mikey who pushes the hardest for Leo's new role in the team
sometimes Mikey will challenge Leo to something silly, like who can make the most throws of a paper ball into a trash can, just to push Leo into exercising
he finds other little ways to help the others too, but he still can't solve the big problems on his own
meltdown ensues
Mikey has to learn to take care of himself, too, while the others have to learn they can't lean so hard on him for all their emotional problems
April
the only one holding on around here. it helps that she doesn't actually have to live in the powderkeg
takes a rationally minded approach to all these problems, kind of functioning like family therapist along with Mikey but in a healthier and more controlled way
helps get them resources from above ground
Leo opens up the most about his feelings about his physical condition to her first, because she strikes the best balance between being a sympathetic ear without coddling him
she's also stressed, but she has an outside support network so she's handling it better
Splinter
fully blames himself for what happened to Leo and has a hard time getting over it
depression in full swing
it means he can't easily get out of bed to help his kids, but then he feels bad because he isn't helping them, which worsens the depression, which makes it hard to get out of bed... a vicious cycle
when Leo starts working on his condition he gets a pact out of his dad that they will both work on being healthier together
maybe they manage to find an actual therapist eventually idk lol
either way, Splinter and Leo grumpily sitting over their plate of broccoli and then Leo says "bet I can eat more pieces than you" and it's on son
he's trying his best
Leo's Condition
Leo came out of the armor severely dehydrated and malnourished, even more so than any person should realistically be after two days; just keeping him from dying of the dehydration was the most immediate struggle
the main issue is that Leo's life force, mystic abilities included, were basically sucked out, leaving his body catastrophically physically weak
his muscle mass can come back with time and diet
the bigger problems are the bone density and chronic fatigue. while Leo can improve these, they'll never be back to where they were before the Dark Armor
his reduced bone density means he has to be careful doing anything physical because the chance he can break a bone is much higher than average, and he stands to suffer more from that break than the average person
he'll eventually get to where he can go through his day-to-day life just fine most days, and can even do some of the physical things he enjoyed before, he just has to be careful and know his limits. he'll never be pulling the 1440 off the halfpipe again, but he can still skateboard as long as he's careful.
even when recovered (as much as he can be), he has bad days and days when the fatigue is really strong. how Leo feels on a bad day is up in the air; sometimes he's at peace with it and generally cheerful, happy to be around his family even if he spends most of the time in his chair or on the couch dozing in and out. other days the depression rears its ugly head and he can get a bit nasty and bitter again. his family is much more patient with him on days like that than he is with himself.
in the beginning Leo also has brain fog and sensitivity to light and sound. these clear up over time, especially once Leo starts making more effort to exercise his brain. he starts reading a lot more and doing puzzles, especially things like sudoku and word puzzles, which helps a lot. thankfully these changes aren't permanent
his inner ears were also damaged a bit, this also heals up largely on its own, sometimes he still has difficulties hearing his brothers if they're whispering or far away but it's not so bad he needs assistance
Leo's Devices
Wheelchair
this is obviously the one Donnie had the most fun building and it shows. this baby is tricked out. Leo also likes to suggest improvements often, some for actual functionality but many just because he thinks it would be cool (like neon lights on the spokes)
it is blue obviously. do you even need me to tell you that?
it's fully electronic but Leo can also wheel it around freely if he wishes. Leo likes to wheel himself when he has the energy because it's good exercise he doesn't have to go out of his way for and he just likes feeling like he's moving himself under his own power. but when he's not feeling up to it he just drives it with the electronic controls instead
it has handles that extend and retract. being allowed to touch the handles is a major sign of Leo's trust and initially it's only for his bros + April + Splinter. Leo hates being moved when he doesn't actually ask to be moved, and he also hates being tipped backwards so his fam knows not to do it even as a joke (and it's so heavy that tipping him is kind of hard, anyway). someone touching the handles or messing around with them without permission gets you immediate backlash from protective siblings
that said Leo has them extended often so he can hang things off them, even though Donnie constantly gripes that that is not their intended purpose!
Sr Hueso is another person who gets handle-touching-privileges pretty fast, and he's also the one Leo asks to move him most often because he thinks it's really funny. he hams it up every time. Hueso is exasperated but does it anyway
(if Hueso adds a few extra wheelchair-accessible tables to Run of the Mill no one has to know)
the chair can also be moved by S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N. this is mostly just for emergency situations, or times when the chair is somewhere Leo is not. Shelldon is a very good boy who does not move the chair without Leo's permission.
it has a billion storage spaces and little hidey holes and it can sync with Leo's phone to play music and it also has a charge port for his phone and yeah basically anything Leo and Donnie can come up with goes into this thing. it's a behemoth
Donnie also made Leo a lighter-weight chair with fewer features that he most often uses when he's good using his walker/cane/braces but wants to clear a larger distance first, and eventually Donnie makes him an athletic wheelchair so he can play games like wheelchair basketball
Walker
the walker is also blue but there's nothing particularly special about it
Leo hates using it because it feels like an old person thing. even if realistically he knows there are plenty of reasons people use them, including his own situation, culture is culture and it makes him feel bad no matter what rationality states
so basically once he doesn't have to use it he doesn't
as they all get more comfortable with Leo's situation and he starts openly using humor to cope, jokes about Leo's chair and cane become pretty commonplace in the fam (all good-natured of course). they know the walker is too much of a sore spot though, and poking fun at it is the fastest way to get Leo to do something stupid, so no one does. it's better to just pretend it's not there
Crutches/Canes
he eventually ends up with a variety of these, with different levels of support depending on what he's needing on a given day.
some of the canes are more fashionable than others. this is important to him.
Leo pretty much always has one of these on hand just in case, even on days where he feels alright to walk on his own
he is not afraid to bonk a brother with a cane or crutch but he does so knowing they are free to retaliate
Leg Braces
Leo doesn't need these every day but they're a pretty standard part of his wardrobe at this point
they start out plain but get increasingly elaborately decorated as time goes on because he, Donnie, and Mikey can't help themselves
like the walker, the braces are in the "don't make fun of" zone, though Leo is happy to get positive comments about them and doesn't really need their presence ignored
Other Mobility Aids
Leo has a variety of things to help with his loss of grip strength, difficulties bending over, tremors, etc. all of them are either made by Donnie or ethically "acquired" by April
he drives everyone crazy by leaving them in random places and then forgetting where they are. Donnie starts installing locator tags on everything they give Leo
jokes about these are fine, Leo makes them often himself and has silly names for all of them (this also drives Donnie crazy)
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3zun data analysis
I was wondering how much the different 2-out-of-3zun ship fics were actually focused specifically on them, rather than having them feature as side pairings, so I did a little mini-experiment. Beginning by searching for otp:true in each tag
(This doesn't give you the real number of fics were the pairing is the main focus, for the record. The other tagged ships might've been a side pairing, and the one we're filtering for the main one, and otp:true also filters out platonic relationships. So, for example, a nielan fic that has the nie brothers tagged as a platonic bond will also be filtered out. But since it does that for all ships you can still get a good idea how likely each one of them is to be the center in their fics)
My hypothesis was that Nielan would be the least likely, as they're frequently tagged as a side pairing in wangxian focused fics, with xiyao and nieyao having comparable results.
Nielan, as I type this, have 2154 works, of which only 627 have only nielan tagged. That is 29% of all nielan fics.
Next up is xiyao, who have 4534 works, of which 2195 only have xiyao tagged, a significanly higher 48%
And lastly nieyao, who have the least works in total with 1749, but have 683 works only tagged nieyao, more than nielan despite having less fics overall. Ending up at 39% of all nieyao fics
So I was right about nielan being lower, but turned out to be wrong in my hypothesis that nieyao and xiyao would end up with comparable results!
One possible factor is that nieyao, being a smaller ship, is more affected by those big collection-type fics that have a dozen pairings tagged for every chapter, as well as 3zun fics that have the individual pairings tagged. (Which we'll get to later!!)
Also, Huaisang - typical of him - butts into nieyao more. 5% of nieyao fics have the Nie brothers tagged platonically, and almost exactly the same number are tagged sangyao. Compare that to lan xichen's much more reserved little brother who really doesn't want to be a part of this, as only 3% of xiyao fics are tagged with the twin jades, and zhanyao... isn't much of a thing.
I'd anticipated both of these, but I'd also expected that xiyao, being a bigger ship, would be a less controversial background pairing for wangxian, who - let's be real - are the main players within the mdzs fic space so they massively impact the numbers. I know xiyao are certainly not without controversy (god no) and the go-to side pairings are xicheng and xuanli instead but like... compared to nieyao, surely they're the normie pick? And, well, 25% of xiyao fics are tagged wangxian compared to only 20% of nieyao fics so that is somewhat true, but not as much as I'd thought. (For comparison, 43% of nielan fics are tagged wangxian)
Now let's look at 3zun overall. Of the 1127 3zun fics, 277 are exclusively tagged 3zun. That's only 25%
But that doesn't feel right. After all, a lot of 3zun fics also tag the individual pairings. And excluding them like we did with the 2-out-of-3zun ships feels wrong. You'd categorize a fic tagged with both nieyao and 3zun as a 3zun fic, wouldn't you?
So I manually excluded each non 2-out-of-3zun pair. This took a bit, but you end up with 538 3zun fics which are either not tagged with any side pairing, or only tagged with a ship already contained in 3zun. That is 48% of all 3zun fics, similar to xiyao.
So there you have it! Xiyao is the most independent of the subfandoms, having almost half of its works centered solely around xiyao (and even more primarily focused on xiyao. As I said, otp:true also filters out works that still focus on xiyao but have other background relationships) with the overall 3zun fandom having a similar focus, followed by nieyao, and then nielan.
edit: this has a part 2 now
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Peter Pan Parallels: Is The Upside Down Neverland?
Lately I've been thinking about Petergate and I came up with what possibly could be another angle to the already complicated Peter situation— what if the name Peter is a reference to Peter Pan?
I don't think this is the only reason that the name Peter becomes prominent, although the show itself does seem to contain other references to Peter Pan, and even creates a correlation between the Upside Down and Neverland.
Peter Pan as a character has origins in early works from author J.M. Barrie, and the Peter Pan story as known today originated in a play written by Barrie before being adapted into a book and subsequently several film adaptations. The story of course being about a young boy named Peter who brings some kids to a magical land where they can never grow old.
It's written very small, but Peter Pan is on the season 4 DNA board!
There are a few instances about never growing old in the show, and they usually come from Will or involve Will.
The first instance is from season 3 during the rain fight, where Mike exclaims that they "aren't kids anymore" and they can't "play games for the rest of their lives." This is then brought up again by Will in season 4, but in a much more hopeful lens.
And then we have the Upside Down, a magical land that appears to be somewhat stuck in time.
I say "somewhat" because I'm honestly unsure if the UD actually frozen in time, or if there is just an impression of Hawkins the night that Will was taken. However, the emphasis this season on clocks as well as Nancy's mention of being in the past does at least allude to the idea of being frozen in time.
Does the UD actually function like Neverland and keep someone from aging? Will was only trapped in there for a week, not enough time to see if there was any anti-aging going on. Henry was in there for a few years, however since he changed so much physically it's hard to tell if he aged at all (and given that he was in his 30s, any aging wouldn't have been very apparent)
ALTHOUGH there could be a point to be made about the fact that Will and Henry were both able to survive in the Upside Down for as long as they did in the first place, maybe it has to do with both of their powers, but perhaps the UD was preventing them from dying?
Starting with Will, we know that he was in the UD for a week without any food or water. The body can survive that long without food, but water is another thing. The show makes a point to have Erica say this in season 3:
—which leads me to believe that they want to draw attention to the fact that Will was miraculously able to survive for so long in a place without any water. Perhaps the UD was able to keep him alive?
Something similar happens with Henry, too. It seems like his body was adapting to the new environment overtime, but still the details of his survival are vague and his ability to stay alive after all that time is still rather anomalous to say the least.
There's an indirect reference to the UD as Neverland in season one, when Troy states that "Will is in fairyland now with all the other little fairies." and while YES he means this in a derogatory way, the dialogue is still a way to point at the fact that Will really is in a magical land, and possibly even a hint at his powers.
Notice as well how Will's light magic bares a resemblance to pixie dust from the Disney movie.
Between Henry and Will, we can see both of them as being Peter Pan-like. Henry as Peter as in the one who lures children into his magical fantasy land, or Will as Peter the boy who doesn't want to/has trouble growing up.
Another aspect of Peter Pan is his shadow, which is detachable and seems to have a mind of its own. Which reminds me a lot of this:
Barrie's intentions behind what the shadow represents is pretty vague, although it has been tied to the idea of wholeness, Peter's attachment to the human world as well as duality, wholeness, and lightness within dark and darkness within light. (more to come later)
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