#finally a first rollcall

[kabutoraiger]

[greenplantlizard]

gokaiger episodes 13 & 14 because i could not wait to begin screaming about the carranger tribute

hello yes this is my wife ahim i love her

my boy zaggai just trying to survive out here

Carranger time

first of all, absolute SPOT ON tone

like, my god,,, it's like this for all of the tributes so far basically, but this is Just A Carranger Episode

UNREMARKABLE CIVILLIAN REFERENCE???

finally kyosuke has someone who falls in love with him out of suit

if zealousto and insarn wore high school uniform before,,,, are they naked now?

was SIGNALMAN naked the whole time???!!!

*approaching pitter patter of kyosuke feet*

"no guys, turboranger is turboranger and carranger is power rangers turbo, get it RIGHT"

you ever get used as a battering ram by some lady who has a crush on you?

"i love YOUUUUU"

ah yes, important lessons from the sentai so far: courage, principles, perseverance, kindness, gay sex, traffic safety

y'know what, being able to pull off that whole rollcall sequence with the spinning and everything IS a Greater Power

did i mention the tone? a friend of mine who knows next to nothing about toku happened to be watching ep 14 over my shoulder and by the end was convinced carranger fucking rules (correct)

[passionateseadruid]

(Oh this is gonna get me cancelled)

Okay so I’m going through Hazbin first and in this post I’ll talk about how I’d structure the series as a whole.

First of all If the first season had to have 8 episodes (Looking at you Amazon (bombastic side eye)) then save Adam for the next season and focus on the cast of the hotel and how they're trying to be redeemed.

Simple, move ep 1 to the finale and have it be a cliffhanger two parter to lead into the next season like the first and second seasons of Criminal Minds did.

Then make Episode one start out with Charlie telling everyone in the hotel the history of Hell and why she's trying to redeem sinners and we're gonna add one thing that's gonna have a lot of wight behind it this season. Pentious is already a part of the cast. Charlie introduces everyone through song and the first song is a rollcall for the cast. Everyone would have a portion of the song that represents them in some way

IE: Charlie - musical theatre/showtunes; Alastor - that '30s jazz song like the one he sung in the pilot; Vaggie - punk rock; you get the idea.

Okay here's a change that's just personal preference, every character will be accompanied by a signature instrument.

Alastor would get an Organ (Because in a livestream Viv said Al has a furby organ and I cannot let that go), Lucifer has a fiddle, Adam has an electric guitar, Lute would probably have a bas guitar, The Seraphim would have trumpets, etc (I'll do a separate post for all of the instruments I think would fit each member of the cast so feel free to comment what instrument you think would best suit each character).

The rest of the episode is primarily focused on Pentious and him trying his best to fit in but failing miserably. Angel and Alastor make fun of Pentious for being so bad at redemption, ironic considering neither of them really want to redeem themselves, Vaggie has a short fuse with him and when something goes wrong she blames him even if it's not his fault, husk is apathetic toward his presence and Nifty is a creepy stalker.

It all comes to a head at the end of the episode where Charlie overhears Pentious talking to himself saying how he "Should just give up! It's never going to work. I'll go back to the ship and rot with my egg boiz." This will be relevent later. Charlie basically barges in and we getthe second song of the episode in the style of it starts with sorry.

then Ep 2 we focus on Alastor like the show did, but it's solely Alastor, I'd take the Overlord meeting from ep 3 and put it in this episode. We'd see a bit of the Vee's (Mostly Vox and Velvette leaving Val til Ep 4) the first half has to do with Vox the second with Velvette and when Alastor comes back to the hotel he is almost relieved to be back in such a familiar place where he feels in charge.

Ep 3 is a Vaggie Episode We take the trust exercises in the A plot and make that the episode. This is basically my main fix for the episode.

Charlie: Okay everyone We're doing trust exercises! The first step to trusting people is... putting yourself out there?

Vaggie: Charlie sweetheart, you know I love you and all but maybe I could take this one? You're a very trusting person and While I love that about you I'd probably be a better fit to teach these guys about trust.

Charlie: Oh! Yeah, of course. Go for it!

Vaggie: *kisses Charlie on the cheek*

This takes care of two problems I have with Vaggie. 1. She's not really a character, this episode will flesh her out by having her take the lead (willingly). 2. It doesn't really feel like Vaggie cares about the hotel or trying to redeem sinners. It feels like she just does stuff because of Charlie.

Ep 4 is Angel Dust That's pretty good the way it is but I might want to introduce Cherri bomb in this episode and have her be a larger part of the episode Like maybe she convinces Charlie to go help angel or helping angel is a stronger theme to the episode and Cherri is trying to stop Charlie from hurting Angel. I don't know, episode 4 is a solid episode and while I personally don't enjoy poison (I'm an Addict fan) I do tolerate the episode. It's written in a way that shows abuse from the perspective of the victim. I just think it's weird that Cherri (who's a big part of Angel's life isn't more involved in the episode.)

Ep 5 is a Husker/Nifty episode. We get some stuff about Husk in angel's episode and Nifty is a gag character it doesn't super seem like she need's a whole episode to dissect her.

Ep 6 probably would be a Cherri Bomb episode since she's important to the story (kinda) Mostly would be about her and angel/ her and Pentious. maybe also a subplot about the hotel not working or even attracting any customers.

Ep 7 This will be a Charlie episode where she tries everything she can to get more people to come to the hotel. we even get to hear a bit more about her past and her family life (setting up for father daughter drama in later seasons (probably season 2)) and at the end of the episode we get the big twist slash reveal about why no one's coming to the hotel. Pentious has been sabotashing them the whole time and working as a spy for Vox.

Ep 8 he redeems himself and earns every ones trust back and Charlie at the end of the episode goes to meet with Adam and he tells her

"I know it's been half a year but we'll be back in one month"

The whole season taking place over about five months. Yes, I know that's not half a year but I needed something that would flow right.

...

This was mostly an impulse post because of my disappointment with Vivian not getting the episode "The Full Moon" out. Now, I don't want to seem ungrateful, I truly am excited for it, but I have a schedule to maintain and I don't want to push off any of my projects just to make sure any interactions were authentic to the show.

This isn't to hate on Viv or Spindlehorse, Running two shows must be very difficult but I don't think people can dissagree that the structure of season 1 of Hazbin was messy, and I was thinking of how I'd restructure it.

[oh-three]

The Rookie S7E1:

Celina's still in long sleeves lol.

Celina still has three months left of her Rookie year lol. Between this and three seasons of Nolan being a rookie, the single season of Aaron's is kinda funny. Man, I'm gonna miss Aaron.

Wilhelm scream lol

They are literally like right next to the airport lmao. Those planes are so low. And there's a lot of them.

Nolan borrowing a scooter is funny af, but also fucking clever

hits runner with scooter 🤣

Oh, he's still injured from the finale of last season.

Ayy, now she's got short-sleeves.

Bradford already chewing out the new rookies before they're even fully geared up for the day lol. Typical.

^ the contrast of Nolan

Ayyy, Lucy's getting promoted.

Oh god, she's gonna make a bet with Tim about them.

Love the rollcall scenes.

…I don't think Ridley's gonna make it. Too nervous. Penn's debatable, he seems mildly arrogant.

Hah. Sorry, Tim.

Thank god Aaron only transferred. He's a good cop. One of my favorites on the show, actually. Still a chance he can cameo occasionally.

I feel like Nolan's got some PTSD regarding gunfights/armed confrontations.

Wesley lmfao 😂

Nikki is taking the news of her father getting shot better than expected. Then again, I was expecting an elementary-aged kid and not a teenager.

Ridley's knowledgeable, but he's nervous in actual situations. He kind of reminds me of Jackson.

Ridley 💀

Yeahhhh, Penn's a little violent. Not surprised. Tim's gonna have fun untraining him of that.

Oh joy, nukes.

Aw, Ridley's got PTSD. That'll make things tough for him, too.

Oof, the girl's dad died.

Wesley. Wesley, don't. You're not supposed to actually talk about the things you hear on those tapes. Just get over it.

Damn, Celina's good.

Love Nolan learning from Nyla that brief undercover moments are actually really helpful.

"Celina's doing great, too, thank you for asking." Lmfao, fair. My man has literally zero context.

Oh, good, Wesley knows he can't actually say anything. Had me worried.

It would be incredibly tragic if someone actually did accidentally shoot the nuke lmao. Good thing Grey had the sense to remind them not to.

Go for it, Nolan.

Ayyyy!

Grey being able to tell it was Nolan from way up in a helicopter is awesome. He knew he needed the praise, and he was able to give it to him from way up there.

Grey's getting promoted??

I didn't need to see the trailer to know Lucy and Tim are gonna end up back together.

Wesley handled that well.

Oh, Penn's homeless. I mean, I get he just came from Texas, but…kinda sad he couldn't secure an apartment or hotel first.

Looking forward to watching Penn and Ridley progress.

[emperor-pavoom]

King Ohger Finale hopes and predictions

They do the King Walk like the one from the first episode but with all 7 of them through the rubble (with the people following them?).

Jeremie says something and Gira goes into Extreme Thought Mode for the third time but he actually understands this time.

Awesome mecha battle.

Brand New World plays.

Zenryoku King plays either during the mecha battle, the leadup to the mecha battle, or in the final scene (they have to play the theme song we know it's gonna play some time during the episode).

Tarantula Abyss gets something meaningful to do.

Dagded's helmet breaks and we see the tardigrade unprotected.

Yanma says "sukapon tanuki" or "takomenchi" near the end of the episode.

Yanma calls Gira by his actual name.

Setup for the crossover movies?

Highly doubt a Boonboomger cameo (outside of the handshake) but I will be surprised if they pull it off.

Final rollcall (with all 7?).

I cry after watching the episode.

[meganechan05]

Before I go into this, I mean none of this with disrespect and do hope you understand this is for educational purposes.

Gender was never a big deal when it came to the Kings' stories and initial announcements (specifically an official magazine released before the pilot; Uchuusen vol 180) did claim Rita as gender neutral and many interviews and a production blog did reiterate they are gender undisclosed/neutral. The show also never referred to them with gendered terms compared to the rest of the cast so it can be left ambiguous. (The only time they were given a gendered term was by a character labeled as the villain's team idiot who barely knows Rita)

It's also not the first time a cis actor played a gender queer character. Ichika (MomoHero from High School Heroes) was a trans girl played by a cis male actor. The main difference between the two characters and their identities is that HHH takes place in modern Japan where discrimination against LGBTQIA+ is present. KingOh takes place in a world where such discrimination just doesn't exist or never mentioned. Rita has been misgendered before like in the webcomics, but it's more of showing how they wouldn't be bothered to correct a stranger (especially a kid who they just scared by accident).

Also, I don't know what you mean by Rita's role usually being filled by a woman. Their color? Their position in rollcall? Their job?

Purple Rangers have been primarily male. There's only ever been 1 official female Purple and that was Yayoi Ulshade as Kyoryu Violet. The shade of their ranger form is also irrelevant and the designers said in the Official Perfect Book that they went through 5 shades before settling on the one they considered most gender ambiguous.

Their position in the lineup is irrelevant. They introduce themself after Himeno and the Papillon switch is pressed after Kamakiri, but they are placed last when it comes to focus episodes in different arcs.

Their job, the Supreme Justice, have mostly been held by men in history until they allowed women to hold the position. It just so happens that Rita's predecessor and successor identify as women compared to them.

It gets confusing because gender ambiguity is still considered a new concept so sources outside of Toei (TV Asahi, news websites, etc) just aren't caught up with the idea of using a neutral term for the character and use a default based on their actor. Even Yano Masato (Racles) admitted how it's a new concept when he talked about Rita's gender in Uchuusen 181. Same for the Head Writer in an interview posted before the finale aired.

I do hope this helps and again, I mean none of this with disrespect. If you have questions about the sources, do feel free to ask. Some have been translated and are on this site by mirai-he-jump. Others require some more digging and needing machine translations (tho the issue is that machine translations also automatically gender which is a pain)

So Rita was non binary all along; would have been nice if they had been more clear about it, and if they hadn't cast a woman to play an enby, and if they hadn't put Rita in the role usually filled by a woman

[falsebooles123]

Car Trouble and a Full Scredule - Diary of a Big Ole Gay - 3/26/23

Hey Whores, I'm back after what feels like a ridicolous long week.

Let Me get into it. Monday morning my second kitchen job cuts my hours because they got a new guy. He seems pretty Chill, Then both the business meetings and date I had planned on monday got reschreduled for the middle of the week. My car has been acting up so I had to deal with the stress of driving a ticking time bomb that I don't know whats wrong with it to work because I need the money. and my scredule changed again friday like a couple hours before work. That was when I set up my second checking and spent a bunch of money because my bills had already came out. It was like 40 bucks but y'know what I deserved to treat myself. Also this was the weekend so not only did we have a shitshow of a friday prime rib night dinner but I also got to finally do a dinner service on the line. The fact that they have a bonified dishwasher now instead of just recreating that thing were your mom passive-aggresively bitches about the dishes because no one else will wash them.

(I'm the mom in this context, also this was the only gif I could find that didn't give people seizures or was literally porn.)

so I had a lot going on. I also watched a bunch of TV and did manage to catch a few films since the last week we did this.

Caged! (1950) dir. John Cromwell

Some people have called this this the Godmother of the Women in Prison movies and you wouldn't be remised to notice its DNA in later films and shows like Orange is the New Black.

I talked about it in a lot more depth on Letterboxd so I'll try my best to summerize.

First the movie is about a young ingenue named marie who is sent to an all-women prison on trumped up charges, the film makes a point to discuss the cruelity from the prison guards, including the trunchbullian Matron Harper, the lack of resources for the prisoners, and how oftentimes this type of uncivil atmosphere and lack of real resources to reintergrate them into society cause most of these women to return or in marie's case enter into a life of crime.

Luckily we have fixed all these issues in the prison system and thats totally not the same issues we have today /s

As I have said this is the Proto-Woman in Prison film, perhaps the ur-WIP movie and thus the question is raised.

What About The Lesbians!!!!????

So first I will say that this film is not textually queer, Marie is not eating kitty the second she gets into lockup but the film I will say has a queer sensibility.

I'm just going to quote my Letterboxd Review.

"and the answer is probably. I've haven't read the book that this is based on so I can't tell you if Kellog talked about it but this is a womens prison honey we can guess. We have to remember that this is in the middle of the haes code and so you couldn't have a character just be like, "hi, I like women". That being said there are a few choice lines that hint at that kind of thing. Kitty mentions that after awhile "You don't even think about men, you just fall out of the habit", a newspaper discusses prison immorrality, which probably is reffering to like gambling and smoking cigerettes but might hint at a more siturational inversion so to speak. 

Outside of these supposed oblique references there is the culteral queerness of it. The aestetic aspect of queer coding. First there is obviosly a lot of butchness about this film. we have just a fuckton of these butch tops in this film from Kitty(Betty Garde), Elvira (Lee Patrick) to the trunchbullian Everlyn Harper (Hope Emerson), to even the prison warden Benton (Agnes Moorehead). they all have this kind of dominant aggression to them. This masculinization. 

And this trope continues, Marie has her head shaved at a crucial part of the film and there is the repeated motif of the women doing rollcall were they have to speak there last names first, Marie Allen, now being called ALLEN, marie. Its literally patronymic. 

On one hand we can absoulutely interpret this trope as a comment on how prison dehumanized women, talking away there individality especially there vanity. The social way that they are able to express themselves. And this is emphasized a lot actually, the gift of lipstick at christmas, the head shaving, the fact that Marie asks for a brush during her mugshot and the guard quips back, "why theres no men here".

And I think its important to recognize that this type of dehumanization is different from mens prisons because our sense of vanity is different. A man can affirm his gender by getting jacked in prison but a women can't affirm herself along traditional feminity the system is designed in a certain way to masculinize that experience. In some small sense the very notion of a womans prison is a queer space outside of its constuct as a gynocentric space. 

(note: prison cosmetology is absolutely a thing and women perform a lot of amazing feats of ingenuity, from like tattoing on eyebrows to making makeup out of magazine ink and deoderant but note that these are ways of subverting a system not a byproduct of that system)

Even if we except the trope of a womans prison as a non-normative gendered space its also important to notice that one of the main conflicts in this film is not just between trunchbully Harper and her cruality against Marie, but also between the power struggle of "Corrupting" Marie by the hands of Evelyn and Kitty, who both want her to join there crime syndicate. Marie at one points says "If I said No to Kitty why would I say yes to you". Both of these characters are maternal in a sense but they also take on a very lesbian coding. Evelyn makes a point to gift the women feminine products for christmas, (makeup and a handmirror). In a straight lens its another commentary on femeninity and Evelyns power in the system through a queer lens its almost courtship. This is the type of thing you could buy your girlfriend as a present. In some ways A Life of Crime and Criminal Gayness are symbolic analogs to each other"

Honestly if you were a fan of Orange is the New Black or just like Butch Crime Donnas then this is a pretty good time. Another one of those "This is honestly not that gay but it was an absolute iconic piece of cinema so thank you" movies.

Tea and Sympathy (1956) dir Vincente Minnelli

This was one of those films that took me like a week to watch.

So I've quoted vito russo like 15 times at this point so let me just summerize the vibe. Basically theres a guy in this movie whose a sissy, he dances, he's in theater, he even sews. Wow, what a faggot. and none of the other boys want him to play in their raindeer games because he threatens there fragile masculinity. What I'm saying is that the first half of this TWO HOUR FILM, is just him being bullied for being a sissy.

I'm also saying this shit was highly triggering as both a cocksucker and a limp-wrist soyboy.

(oh god I just had a truamatic flashback were a church mom and her daughter were mocking me for being a limp-wrist faggot and I didn't understand why they asked me to do the limp wrist gesture. and so i'm just puzzled at this random gesture they wanted me to reinnact while my father is just visable angry sitting besides me. Honestly first fuck them and also my dad might be a homophobic asshole but at least he had the decency to never call me a slur.)

so childhood truama and complicated relationship with my father aside after we get through the very long and insuffrable queer misery porn we get to the actually fun part of the movie where there are HORNY MILFS. HORNY MILFS IN YOUR AREA.

THESE WOMAN WANT TO FUCK! NO CREDIT CARDS! HOOKUPS ONLY! CLICK NOW!!!!

yeah basically this movie is two hours of this guy making moves on his landlords wife while the guy is out hanging out with a bunch of twinks.

as I said in my extremly long write-up on the topic. T&S is absolutely a good film in showcasing what this type of homophobia and toxic masculinity is like and it was controversal for a reason but I also want to recognize that as a queer person this shit was hard to sit through.

so for a bit of fun yet another LB quote.

Because this shit is true to life. It feels very reminescent of my own experiences with homophobia. The kind that is more subtle and exclusionary and so while this is a objectively subversive and provokative film. I'm still going to relegate it to "Things I'm making Straight People watch during pride month while I leave the room". Its a double feature with brokeback mountain. Whats that.... thats four hours of Queer Misery Porn. Well too damn bad. Maybe if you stopped sharing those proto-terf facebook memes we could have watched Cruising or Rocky Horror. Sit Down, Shut Up, and relive my childhood trauma and daddy issues straiggot.

The Strange One (1957) dir. Jack Garfein

One of the weirdest episodes of Haze Him I've ever seen.

Jokes aside The Strange One is basically this drama set at a military academy. Person with a real name. Jocko De Paris, (I'm not making that up), is basically one of those rich assholes who is also criminal insane. He manipulates a group of other cadets into getting a guy expelled for being drunk.

Why did he do this. Well if you believe morissey (yes that Morissey), its because Paris is a little bit of a closet queen.

This film is weirdly homoerotic for no discernable reason. The queerness of the characters have nothing to do with it the director was like I'm going to make a movie with deep ideas about the nature of evil and tyranny and also everyones going to kind want to suck dick.

Another one of those films thats honestly kinda slow but I still think about the visuals.

Everything Else I Watched This Week

oof ok I finished Re: Mind, loved it messy moe drama made no goddamn sense would watch again.

Tried to watch Circus of Fear which is a Rialto Crime Movie but not one of the Krimi Films. Also Really Boring.

Also binged the second season of carole and tuesday. I loved it, the shows not perfect but I had so much fun with it.

I also saw Free Guy which.... was fun. I'm sorry but not every blockbuster is going to be worth adding to the Falseboolesey Hall of Fame. Also its like a second-rate Lego Movie which is without any irony. A modern Classic.

(this is non-negotiable. The lego movie is a deep introspection on the apollian vs dionysian drives, an exploration of childhood and adult perspectives and are fear of the joy of choas. It also may literally be cladestine Agritprop)

I also tried to have a Falsebooles123 Kinema movie night. I watched Grandma's Boy which people mention a lot as the prime example of like the sissy trope but honestly I don't remember anything about the film. I kinda just blanked out.

anyway whores. I have an entire week off starting tomorrow so its going to be a lot of editing, yard work, and doing some prep stuff for april which will be so busy. I'm excited through. I'm also very close to watching all the films I could find in the internet archive so theres that. woot woot.

[tsuki-sennin]

Sonoooooooo... Sonoshi? Sonohead? Sonoyes. Sono-very busy this week. Didn't have a lot of time (as you can imagine), sooo...

I'd like to make a brief addendum from last time. Sonoshi's Noto form is not an Arashi reference, but instead a reference to Kamen no Ninja Akakage, a manga-turned-Toei Toku production that aired from late '87 to early '88, before eventually making its way to anime form. I uh, have not read this manga nor seen either adaptation yet, but I plan to eventually.

I also learned that Sonoshi is canonically non-binary! From what I've seen, the fans have taken to them somewhat fondly. I do not know what their deal is yet, but I suppose we'll just have to learn now, eh?

Spoilers, I guess...

-Our dog came home!

-The world only needs one of Dog Man.

-Final Boss Time?

-I see the Noto are much more into the whole team thing than we realize.

-How we lookin', Haruka?

-Terrible, okay!

-"You fool! I believe in you..."

-Hello, Sononi! Your dog came back!

-Yeah, smile :)

-Odeeeeeeen!

-How you doin', chef man?

-Wife back. Good job, Kijino.

-Yeah, you tell yourself that, Saruhara.

-I kinda like how... expressive Sonoi's letting himself be lately, he seems like he's really enjoying his life.

-NOI-CHAN

-I love telephone gags so much. Uh, there was this one I distinctly remember from Zack and Cody, from when I was a kid.

-"YOU THINK I'M STUPID AND SMELL LIKE A YAK?"

-Free lunch!

-KNOTS

-Oh hello, Sonoshi! I see you're here now.

-Noooo, the seats!

-You seem like a real freak.

-Tarou, you have very little to say about being rude.

-Is that

-That's a fucking Ocarina.

-Ah, callin' in the fightin' force!

-Yeah you go, shef man!

-What an outfit.

-Sonoshi. There they are.

-They vanished!

-"I'm your new manager."

-"You're too gay to function, you're getting friendly with another chick's man, and you... whew, you..."

-Oh my God, motherfucker has pixie dust.

-Kneel before them.

-"After you've scrubbed all the floors in Ideon, then we can talk about mercy!"

-Announce one's selves!

-Nanaju-hachi Paasento!!!

-Extinguished.

-A duel!

-Haruka's the... warrior poet type, just like Shinichi!

-OH EWWW EARWAX

-The fuck, man?

-Ohhhh, yaaaas, Shinichi, speculate!

-...I think you're aiming a little too high though.

-Oh hey Don Kaito. Yeah, the health inspector came by and shot their cocaine everywhere.

-Disinfect, disinfect!

-Oh, they're actively doing that, okay.

-Sonoshi, you motherfucker.

-Fukeyo, Arashi, Arashi, Arashi! ...yeah, I know I corrected myself about them not being Arashi, but...

-Gonna mop the floor with them, huh Tarou?

-"Kick his ass, Tarou-san!"

-Poor Haruka.

-God, they just... blow away in a whirlwind of earwax. That is... horrendous.

-SONOZA JHKKHG

-I love you.

-"Fighting is easy. It's dealing with that dipshit that's the problem."

-Y'know, it makes incredible sense that Sononi's a master archer. Cause Shinichi just got shot down in spectacular fashion.

-Ohhhhhhhh, we can... steal that, okay?

-Okay, I'm trying to imagine what kinda Hitotsu-ki he'd steal the form of...

-Man, Sonoi.

-Oh yay, Minoru-san's okay! That's good. ...did uh, somebody pick him up from Noto Jail? Cause, like, I definitely didn't see Tarou pick him up when he died at Sonoi's hands the second time.

-My man was about to become a Hitotsu-ki for the fourth time.

-Actually, wait no, more than that, you can just... catch those things whenever?

-Boyfriends doin' rollcall.

-I see Haruka's very happy about that.

-Nah, don't worry Sonoshi, he's just... sorta there sometimes and not there the other.

-Ideon Sentai... Notoranger!

-Had squibs set up the whole time!

-Interrupting Jirou!

-"Get in then, moron!"

-Don! Don! Donbrothers!

-"Oh shit, I'm deeeeead..."

-Noooooo!

-Ohhhh, that's clever.

-Veryyy clever

-Get fucked, idiot!

-"Rest in piss, Hitotsuki!"

-I uh... don't think I can discern what Hitotsu-ki it is. Seems kinda animalistic.

-We already had Uchuu-ki and Ginga-ki, if I remember right. ...Seijuu-ki? Seijuu-Ki, that fits. Our first ever animal sentai, iirc.

-Tiger Peach!

-Dog appears.

-Light of the Galaxy...

-Sonoshi falls!

-See you around, Earwax!

-Ape shall not kill ape, gotcha.

-Oh...

-Ohhhh, Tsuyoshi, what the hell. That ain't bad.

-Shef.

-Tsubasa, we gotta cook.

-I enjoyed Sonoshi's presence in this episode quite a bit, as you can imagine. As a he/they myself, I uh... hope they get a bit more character development than "Obnoxious Bureaucrat", I'd hate to see a rare NB character in a mainstream toku amount to such little screentime and not even get to fight at full capacity in their own form. Naki didn't get to do too much either, still a bit burned by that.

-That being said though, I find Sonoshi very entertaining and want them to stick around as the Noto's very own Don Kaito. Just this above-it-all superhero with a shitton of random skills and resources. ...only replace Kaito's implied smugness with very explicit smugness.

-Right yeah, see you Monday then. ...maybe.

[ingek73]

Princes Andrew and Charles to be ‘taken to the tower’ in London Dungeon event

Actors playing princes will escort visitors on to ride and be taken to ‘face King Henry VIII’s royal wrath’

Nadia Khomami

Fri 18 Feb 2022 15.41 (CET)

Princes Andrew and Charles will be joining the cast of the London Dungeon this weekend to take guests to the tourist attraction’s so-called “Traitors’ Gate”.

In the wake of Andrew settling the sexual assault case filed against him by Virginia Giuffre, and cash-for-honours allegations linked to Charles’s charity, actors playing the duke and future king will escort visitors onboard the Dungeon’s Tyrant Boat Ride.

They will first be taken to “face King Henry VIII’s royal wrath” at the Tower of London – marking the first time the Dungeon has sentenced modern figures to the tower.

According to a release by the South Bank attraction, guests on the ride would usually join Anne Boleyn on her final journey along the Thames to Traitors’ Gate after being sentenced by Henry VIII.

On the journey, they “meet their fate while facing intense darkness, choppy waters, scurries of rats and the foul stench of sewage – but for this weekend only London’s darkest history has been given a modern twist”.

A spokesperson for the London Dungeon said: “If we can learn anything from history, it’s that very naughty princes should be sent straight to the tower. In the absence of Her Majesty, the London Dungeon has taken it upon itself to task Henry VIII, a monarch famous for his liberal use of the tower, to teach these two a valuable lesson.”

It is not the first time the London Dungeon has drawn inspiration from rolling news coverage. Last month, as Sue Gray’s report was handed to the government, it mocked up images of Boris Johnson awaiting his fate in the dock of its courtroom.

“The London Dungeon’s judge channels her inner Sue Gray and puts the prime minister in the dock at the famous South Bank attraction – will Partygate banish him to join the rollcall of the Dungeon’s most nefarious characters?” it asked at the time.

[graceslavenderhaze]

Hear the sirens, {connor stevens}

synopsis: After the shadow man was defeated their was no new supernatural anomalies in town, then you and your wayward family showed up. 

also this gif is lovethephantoms gif but I still can’t figure out why the handle won’t come up underneath the gif. 

another female requested reader however when referred to in the writing the pronouns are gender neutral.

This is part one of three!

The Midnight Society had finally settled back into life as it normally was. Gabby had passed her PSAT’s and gotten her permit, still working her way to get out of shadow bay. Hanna still heavily involved in her activism and getting more signatures than before hand on her petitions, making the world a better place even if it was one step, by herself, at a time. Luke back to focusing on school and wrestling, he was still benched for weekend meet for disciplinary due to being late to practice which gave him plenty of time to work on the science project he owed . Jai back to being the comic book nerd his friends loved him as, no longer feeling like he had to own up to any sort of standards when his friends loved him the way he was. Then there was Connor. Who found it harder than his friends to move on, it wasn’t that easy for him. His dad didn’t know what happened so he carried on with the fishing trips like usual. Luke and Hanna had started dating after the glow dance so he was adjusting to his best friend not always being available. While he knew that the shadow man was gone, something in him still felt dark. Like a part of him had been permanently darkened by what he’d been through. He felt the hairs on the back of his neck stand up whenever he walked by cemeteries, or historic settlements of shadow bay. He pushed it all down and acted like nothing happened. But he still slept with the lights on. He still had nightmares most nights. 

The Amana family Coven had been around for centuries. It was one of the few that was a female centric coven throughout the dark ages in magic along side the golden ages. The eldest of the coven was Gaia Amana, whose daughter was Leticia Amana, they remain the only two witches in the coven. Leticia married Willow a human woman that had been orphaned in her childhood due to an magical accident claiming her parents. They had two children. Two daughters. One who was a Witch with the gift of clairvoyance. Another who was a Banshee with a generational blood curse. 

That Witch, with the clairvoyance? That was you. Your Sister was the Banshee. This was the story of your family and the magic deeply routed throughout your family and bloodline, biological and adoptive. Growing up with magic isn’t a fairytale. You never stayed in one town longer than four years, where there was witches there was hunters who never strayed far.

So anyone who had magic lived by three commandments for protections.

Thou shall not bear the knowledge of magic,

Thou shall not caress a practitioner of magic,

Thou shall not survive a witches love. 

By those three commandments your family was able to continue to practice their respective magic without worrying about witch hunts in town. But the times had changed from when your grandmother first took over the coven. It was the twenty first century and spirituality and supernatural abilities were somewhat mainstream, not the truth but the refraction of what was going on. It blurred the lines of what was actually going on. So when it was time for the quadrennial move, your mothers had chosen a small town in Canada. Shadow Bay. There was hardly any supernatural occurrence’s there. With the exceptional of a magic shop but witch hunters had standards so they’d never show up there anyways. 

You’d gotten used to the somewhat lonely routine of your life. The moving every four years, the secrets about your magic, while it wasn’t ideal. You loved your magic and you wouldn’t trade your abilities for anything else in the world. But having some solid friends would’ve been a nice start.  

The drive wasn’t the longest you’ve ever taken, it also wasn’t the shortest you’ve every taken either. The only difference was that due to getting your license recently your grandmother let you drive her car. You’d lived in a lot of placed over the years. Apartments, ranch, colonial, victorian. Now you were living in a cottage in the woods by a lighthouse. Pulling into the drive you passed a group of six people. Five teens who looked around your age and one who seemed to be younger possibly in middle school. 

“Keys are in the mail box.” Your grandmother said, you looked over. “That’s harsh.” You said unbuckling and opening the door to retrieve the keys from the mail box. If the group of teens weren’t staring before they definitely were now. “Can i help you ?” You asked turning around at the group of teens who were like you thought, were staring.

A tall blonde in a leather jacket and all black, A red head wearing an army jacket and docs, A brunnette with curly hair who had a denim jacket on, A tanned brunnette boy wearing street clothes, A pale brunette who had a skateboard not far from his grasp, and a little boy wearing a cap and a wand in his hand.

“Did you just move into the haunted house in the woods?” The brunnette in street clothes asked with zero hesitation. Haunted? “Jai!” The red head exclaimed slapping his arm. The blonde still was staring at you. Like there was this connection flowing between the two of you, you felt it too. “Sorry he has the social skills of a second grader. I’m Hanna Romero.” She said extending a hand towards you. “Y/n Amana.” 

“This is Gabby Lewis, that’s Jai Malyas, He’s Luke Mccoy, on the end is Connor Stevens,” So staring boy has a name. “And that’s my little brother Seth.” She said giving a full rollcall for you. “Sorry i just have to ask, the haunted house in the woods?” Jai said not putting his question down. Everyone turned to him and you laughed. 

“So you believe in the other side?” You said crossing your arms and raising your eyebrows. The group fell silent for a minute. “Well I mean is there really another side? Maybe all the funs having here.” Connor said smiling at you, lying. You didn’t need magic to know. You just knew the faces of people who’d experienced the supernatural and didn’t know how to explain it afterwards.

“All right then pretty boy.” You said slightly taken aback Connors eyes widened. “Are you going to shadow bay high once you get settled?” Gabby asked you. You nodded, “Yeah my sister and I are suppose to start next week.” Gabby looked at Connor and then back to you, “We could show you both around, give you the old razzle dazzle.” She said. You smiled, “Yeah i’d really appreciate that!” 

“No problem! Right Connor?” Gabby said, nudging him. You turned your eyes backed to him. “Yeah no problem at all.” He said running a hand through his hair. You nodded. “I should probably go but i’ll see you guys next week.” You said, each of the teens saying a goodbye to you and you got into the car where your grandmother was waiting, dropping the envelopes with the keys on the dash board. 

“Well that looked like a lot more than just getting the keys.” She noted as you started to drive up into the woods. “Just some local kids who offered to show me around when i start and also said our house is the local haunted house in the woods.” You said turning as the road winded. She nodded, “This town is going to be different, you can feel it can’t you?” You could and it gave you butterflies. 

That night after dinner you sat up decorating your room. You’d never had your own room before and now you had free creative decisions. You sister knocked on the door holding two cups of tea, “Tea time?” You nodded. You were older by two years, it wasn’t much but sometimes it still managed to wedge a gap between the two of you for certain subjects. She placed your mug down on your desk were you were placing posters up and she sat on your bed. “So Grams said that you were flirting with some outsiders type beat boy earlier.” 

You turned taking a sip, “I was not flirting. I might’ve called him pretty boy. But that’s the highest form of flattery rather than flirting if anything!” You said to your sister. “What if you date him? What if you fall in love and have cute babies?” She gushed. “I just met him!” You exclaimed to her turning around, “Oh come on, haven’t you ever wanted to date someone?” 

“I don’t date. We move too much besides there’d be too much lying. It would just be heartbreak for me and whoever i’m with.” You said turning your attention back to decorating rather than the conversation. Silence washed over and the question that had been on everyone’s minds was asked once again. “Is it gonna be different here?” 

You stalled, exhaling slowly. “You have the gift of clairvoyance, if anything you can tell out of all of us.” She said with excitement. “No i’m not doing it.” You said shutting her suggestion down. “Oh come on!” She persisted. 

“Astral projecting isn’t meant for figuring out if we’re going to live out our coming of age fantasies, it’s meant for real magic. I’m not doing it. If any clairvoyant dreams come to me, that’s one thing. I’m not chasing them.” You said breaking down the now empty box that once held pictures, posters and other wall hanging knick knacks. Your sister pouted, “Buzzkill.” She muttered under her breath, “Well were either of the girls cute and give gay vibes?” She asked as she finished her mug and placed it on the floor. 

“Ask them yourself. They offered to show us around on our first day. But no powers. If you want a relationship it has to be fully yourself no magic sire ties. Magic sometimes makes it messy.” You said unfortunately speaking from experience. Magic was beautiful but it doesn’t come from nothing, there is a give and a take. Like everything else in the universe. 

That night you found it hard to sleep, you usually had issues sleeping the first night in a new town. It was some sort of internal clock routine. You snuck out of the front door, for a house that had been around for as long as it had been it wasn’t the loudest. The floor boards didn’t creak every time you walked over them, the doors didn’t screech whenever you opened them an inch at a time, and the house didn’t settle several times a day. But for all you knew a spell could’ve been casted to prevent that. 

You found comfort being on your own. Having clairvoyance was overwhelming at times. You had no control over your powers, they never had a specific trigger, so naturally you just steered clear of people in general. You figured there was no way to be given unwanted visions of the future if you just didn’t have anything to do with anyone at all. Your own loneliness was your own fault. Walking through the woods you felt the feeling of dark magic, it was a distinct feeling that you hadn’t felt often but it was unforgettable when you did. It over takes you, like a wave but instead of being able to see through the water its ink. It’s heavy, and dark. It drags you under. 

You hear several snaps of twigs behind you and slightly startled you turn to see the animal or whatever that was behind you. Ready to cast a spell incase whatever followed was a foe and not a friend you gathered your hands in front of your body, “Either you come out or it’s going to be a bad night for you.” You called out into the darkness. Several more twigs snapped under what you assumed where footsteps as a dark shape came out from behind the tree. 

“I surrender!” The figured called out with slight fear in their voice. “My hands are up!” The voice sounded so familiar as they neared towards you. Once they were within eye sight you noticed it was one of the boys from earlier, Connor. “ Take it easy there cobra kai.” He said gesturing to your hands which could be assumed in a fighting position, which they were just not the fighting position he thought it would be. 

You took your hands away from the stance they were place in front of your body, “So, you enjoy taking walks in the dark and startling people pretty boy?” You asked crossing your arms. He lowered his flashlight so he wasn’t practically blinding you anymore. He laughed lowly for a second, “To be fair with the way i was snapping twigs, if you were startled that sounds like a you deal.” 

You smiled at him for second, “I’m Connor Stevens by the way, we met earlier but i don’t know you if remember me.” He said running a hand through his hair, a nervous habit probably. “Oh so you assume that you’re unforgettable. Not a chance pretty boy.” You said taking several steps closer. Slightly taken aback once again by your boldness for the second time in the one day. “I have a name you know.” 

“Oh so you don’t find pretty boy flattering?” You asked coyly, going silence after trying to create an argument. “Thought so.” You said smiling. His eyes stayed glued onto you, his dad has taught him better than to stare. 

“Sorry, i just keep getting this deja vu feeling but i would definitely remember meeting you.” He said unfiltered getting close enough for you to catch a vision, you back up slightly and he’s hurt by this. It’s written all over his face. “I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.” He apologized quickly and sincerely.

“Oh no i just have this thing with physical touch, it’s nothing personal. You’d remember meeting me? Are you reading into my character?” You said with a slight cockiness mixed into the tone. He nodded, “No it’s just you’re literally one of the prettiest girls i’ve ever seen.” You dropped the flashlight that you’d brought with you. You rushed forward to pick it up as did Connor, both your fingertips grazed each other.

The images flooded through your head. You saw past images first, not older than a month or so. It was dark, he was in the woods running, then there was a book of spells it looked like ever other witches book, and then he was grabbed into the dark. Inside of something that looked like a lighthouse but rotted on the inside and there was absolutely no light. Then there was present, this moment right here right now. The future was the two of you in front of the high school, you guessed. Then it was just the two of you, your aura’s with a red string connecting them at the pinkies. But then it was him holding your hands as something tried to drag you. Then it was over. 

You blinked a few times before looking back up at Connor, “Are you okay? You looked like you saw a ghost.” He said with a slight laugh dropping the flashlight into your palm like it was burning him to touch. “Something like that.” You muttered lightly and standing back up. Silence washed over, “I should probably get back home before anyone notices i’m gone.” You said. He nodded, “See you around, cobra kai?” 

“See you pretty boy.” You confirmed turning around to walk back to your house for the night. Sneaking back in just as quietly as you left. You managed to fall asleep before the sun rose this time. Once you fell asleep, the visions still lingered on a loop. Despite how much you hated it on a deep level it was comforting compared to the nightmares that had a tendency to plague you from time to time. 

The next morning your family had gotten take out from the local diner for breakfast and during the morning conversation no one mentions anything that gives away your nightly adventure. Throughout the rest of the week you and your family continues to get settled into your house. You hadn’t seen Connor on any of your nightly walks through the woods throughout the rest of the week and as the day of starting school gets closer you just assume you’ll see him along with his friends. 

Your sister and you were sitting in the office after you’d gotten your schedules and other paperwork. “We have two student volunteers who offered to show you around.” The secretary said as she handed the two of you a peppermint, Slightly disappointed, going under the impression you’d get to hang out with Connor and his friends today. The door creeks open and you turn. Gabby and Hanna enter the office, you notice through the glass pane of the door Luke, Jai and Connor standing in the hallway waiting for them. 

“Ah, Hanna Romero and Gabby Lewis. This is Y/n Amana and Ramona Amana.” She said as the two of you stood up. “If you need anything during your next few days don’t hesitate to reach out.” She said sincerely, offering a comforting smile. Your sister and you both exchanged thanks before leaving the office. 

You saw Luke nudge Connor to which he muttered a shut up, you smiled. “Nice to see you again pretty boy.” You said smirkingly, Jai looked up from his phone. “Again, you went into the haunted woods?” He said looking at Connor, who blank faced. “Thanks for ratting me out. Besides, there wasn’t anything out there other than Y/n and their fists of fury almost giving me a black eye.” He said punching you lightly in the shoulder, laughing with you. 

“What’s the deal with those woods anyway? It seems like everyone has some story about them.” Ramona asked no one specific just wanting a general answer after hearing the endless week of comments. The group went silent, “Okay so like did someone get murdered there. Some true crime type beat?” You asked as you leaned against the wall next to Connor. Leaning your head on his shoulder, he leaned his head on yours after a few moments of hesitation. 

“It’s an unbelievable story.” Jai said as he looked at the comic in his hand with a confused look and then closed it, Ramona smirked. “Oh we know a lot about those type of stories.” She said standing next to Gabby. Both were stealing looks when the other wasn’t. “Where are you guy’s from?” Hanna asked with confusion and a slight laugh. “Where aren’t we from.” You said under your breath catching the attraction of the group. 

“We’re military, we move a lot.” Ramona said. The cover story that had been engrained into you both from elementary school. “Damn that must suck.” Luke said getting elbowed by Hanna, “I mean thank you for your service.” He corrected himself. You laughed a little as Luke tried to awkwardly save himself. You saluted him, causing Connor to smile. 

“Nice bracelets.” Gabby said to Ramona, she looked down at them before looking back up. “Thanks.” She said slightly flustered and blushing. “Mo you should see if you and Gabby have any classes together.” You suggested slightly trying to wing woman. “What? Oh yeah!” She said handing over her schedule eagerly to Gabby. Soon enough the two walked off. 

“So, Hanna do you have the list for morning announcements?” Jai said, Hanna met him with a confused look as did Luke. “Announcements? Oh yeah! We’ll see you guys after home room!” As they left Connor and you in the hallway. “Your friends really lack subtly.” You said as you watched them go down the hallway, Hanna arguing with Jai while Luke occasionally looked back.

“Oh you have no idea.” He said turning back to you, “Oh! How do you feel about horror movies?” He asked reaching into his backpack. “Top three movie genre. Why?” You asked, he pulled out a small “slashers rule” pin and handed it you. “A formal apology for scaring you in the woods the other night, and you seemed like you’d like it.” He said gesturing to your backpack decorated with pins and patches, you smiled. “I love it.” His nervousness seemed to fade with those three words. “I’ve never really had friends or anyone give me something like this so, thank you.” 

“That must’ve been lonely.” He said as you shrugged, it was lonely but it was also complicated. “Yeah but i’m not lonely anymore.” You said as you subconsciously ran your thumb over the pin and looked up at him. He blushed, you’d learned he did that a lot and quite easily none the less. 

“So you ready for the shadow bay tour?” He said pushing off the wall, rubbing his hands together. Students had started to clear out of the halls paying absolutely no attention to Connor and yours’ affair in the corner. “Oh definitely. Just so you know i’ve been to four schools over the past eleven years, so you’re competing with that.” 

“Oh it’s a competition?” He said with fake outburst laced onto his voice, you nodded with a sarcastic smile that turned genuine. “I think i can handle that.” He said as you two began descending down the halls of Shadow Bay high. Despite your own personal barriers and everything you’d ever been taught in your life, you were falling for Connor. Your better judgement knew that you’d pay for that at some point in your life. Sooner or later, you always did. 

--

hello my loves! This is part one of three and i’m currently working on the other parts! 

[greenplantlizard]

toQger VS kyoryuger!!!

the time has finally come to wrap up that one plot threat from kyoryuger that got randomly opened up

LADY IS HERE!!!!!!! YIPPEEEEEEEEEE

just realised the cell patterns on the zorima suits don't match up at the back,,,

noooo don't remind me that daigo and amy got in a relationship, i will never recover

anyway sup kyoryuger!!!

unfortunately there wasn't time in the last vs movie for the toQgers to know what a kyoryuger is

daigo's terrifying haircut

you heard it here first!!! previous rangers get magic public transport passes

lmao z is Not interested until the toQgers get brought up

king, you're standing on shaky ground when you call the toQgers childish, literal children they may be, but you, user of such powers as "fart gas" and "become ball" are very much in a glass house here

i mean i get it but it is very funny to me

loving utchy's enthusiasm

well, this may be the first time two consecutive sentai series have had monsters that can't be defeated by each others teams

i love the contrast between the usual 'hmmm i from one team don't believe the other team is ready' and the samurai bromance going on between the 6th rangers

i hear the sound of early bird ninjas on the wind,,,

a little earlier than i expected

never seen a monster ungrowing in sentai before

actually that's a lie i totally have lol

oh hey we're bringing in the kid forms for this

BABY UTCHY???

meanwhile the kyoryugers are having a whole different story

im glad ian confirmed he's not a pedophile, though i dont know why he went out of his way to say that, that was weird

looks like we've got to work together!!!

king, i know you're used to being The Guy, but lay off man

toQ children

we love backwards compatibility in sentai

MAIKI REFERENCE

i love the toQgers randomly changing size mid combat because obviously they're not gonna make kids do the stunts

bro got told to fuck off and was like "uhhh mr emperor of darkness,,,, you fuck off"

fucking disintegrated him

HELLO???? GIANT TRAIN MAN????

LMAO WHAT THIS IS AWESOME ACTUALLY

you don't see both teams get to show off their ultimate mechas that often in these

oh wow they win

oh yeah devius i forgot he was here

awwww they're all sleepy after being blasted in the face with fuckoff laser lightning,,,

have you ever driven batteries like trains before?

damn the scene of the toQgers facing up to the raised stakes is really good actually

akira is big

HIIII CANDERILA AND LUCKYURO

i love the movie trying to make it look as if the kyoryugers are so much more serious than the toQgers and then luckyuro shows up with all of the cymbal and horn sound effects

torin's ghost calling in from the piss dimension i see

LMAO HE RESURRECTED THE FUCKING DINING SET BROS?

and so it is up to toQ #1 to fight dinosaur sentai's latest evil god LMAO HI DAIGO LITERALLY INCAPABLE OF LETTING ANYONE ELSE FIGHT A FINAL BATTLE I SEE

lol im not actually mad of course the two reds would fight together, i just think it's funny after kyoryuger's goofy final battle where it eventually comes doing to Literally Just Daigo 'King' Kiryu fighting the final boss

"wrong, this is where i die, you die over there"

ian you are not an honorary member of the ladies im sorry

beep beep

both greens bonding over being the same archetype lol

damn devius growls so deeply it sounds like an engine revving up

yet another blow to space travel

LMAO AMY WITH THE REFERENCE TO KYORYUGER'S FINAL BATTLE

i mean of course he's not dead yet

ayyyyyyy i was wondering where the spirit rangers were

but it's the second ones, which means more women, so wins!!!

lmao shadow line :D

oh THERE'S the long rollcall!!!

there goes all of the pyrotechnics budget

devius is kinda a glass cannon huh

and that's all!!! :D fun time :)))

[belovedoboro]

Hi ! Can I please get a Okuyasu with a very good looking male s/o, like josuke he has so many fans lol so it makes Oku insecure and thinks his s/o deserves someone more attractive ? Fluff One shot if its ok 👌

𝓞𝓴𝓾𝔂𝓪𝓼𝓾 𝔁 𝓐𝓽𝓽𝓻𝓪𝓬𝓽𝓲𝓿𝓮!𝓜𝓪𝓵𝓮!𝓢/𝓞

The cheers of several high school girls made its way into your ears. "Who do you wanna bet that's for?" You nudged Josuke with your elbow. He laughed sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck. "(💙)!" They all shouted, grabbing your arm and trying to get your attention. You let out a chuckle then tried to calm down the raging crowd. Unbeknownst to you, however, your boyfriend Okuyasu had fallen back behind everyone else. He understood why you had all the attention on you. Just like Josuke, you were quite attractive to other people. But it bothered him immensely how they always separated you from him just to gawk at you. 'Come on, you're better than this.' Okuyasu shrugged off the negative feelings and caught up with the rest of his friends. "Oi, Oku, where's (💙)?" Josuke inquired. "He's kind of busy. I'm sure he'll catch up soon!" The rest of the group continued on their way to the main entrance of the school.

Currently, the bell had already rung for the first period to start. The empty seat in front of him stirred his nerves. "💙?" The teacher called out for attendance. Josuke and Okuyasu exchanged a glance. Josuke shrugged his shoulders as if to say, 'I'm not sure.' The door to the classroom suddenly slammed open revealing you panting. "I'm here! I'm sorry!" You bowed your head while you apologized, then you sat down. "I'll let it slide this one time." The teacher replied and then continued with the rollcall. You turned around in your chair to get a glance at your boyfriend, who currently had his head resting on the desk. "Oi, Oku." You whispered to him. He turned his head to the side and glanced up at you. Digging through your bookbag, you took out a video game case which is why you were late, to begin with. "I got your favorite game!" You beamed at him. Okuyasu sat up immediately and looked shocked. "Where did you get this? It's not even out yet!" He took the game that you handed to him. "Well-" "Certainly I don't hear two students interrupting my lesson, do I?" The teacher disrupted you. You laughed nervously as the whole class laughed at you two. With your index finger and thumb, you traced over your own lips as if to zip them close while smiling at Okuyasu. He grinned back at your antics.

Before you knew, the school was over for the day. "💙!" Glancing ahead, you saw Okuyasu and the rest of your group at the gate waiting for you. He was waving to you frantically. You give him a small wave as you make your way to them. "💙!" Your body tensed up hearing the girls behind you. It was such a pain to escape them earlier, how could you evade them now? One of them latched onto your arm and started tugging on it. Once the rest of them joined, they began asking several questions. In your peripheral vision, you saw Oku's face drop down in what seemed to be a disappointment. You apologized and excused yourself to the girls and you chased after your boyfriend. He currently walked behind everyone else, mentally beating himself up. 'Maybe (💙) would be with someone else. Preferably someone just as attractive as him. Unlike me, no one really pays attention to me.' Okuyasu kicked a can down the road to let out some of his frustration. "Oku!" You finally managed to catch up to him and you grabbed onto his uniform sleeve. He raised an eyebrow up at you as you bent over to catch your breath. "Do you want to come over and try out the new game?" That's all you had to say for the negative thoughts to escape from his mind. Okuyasu's face lit up, you intertwined your hands together and made your way to your home.

Kicking off your shoes, Oku followed you in a familiar route to your bedroom. "Start it up whenever." You spoke to him as he sat on the floor in front of your television. "I'm going to grab some snacks for us real quick." You bent over and placed a kiss on the top of his head which caused the color to flourish on his face. He looked around your room when you left, at all of the posters you had, to the several blankets on your bed, all in a tangled mess. You soon returned with a tray of various snacks plus two of your favorite drinks. Taking a seat on the floor next to him, you placed the items in front of you two. "💙?" You hummed in response. "Do you ever feel like...you want to be with someone else?" The innocent question brought butterflies to your stomach. "Why would you say that?" You place your hand over his. "I dunno, I just think you would be happy with someone who looks as nice as you..." He ran a hand through his hair, messing it up in the process. You smiled and grabbed him, pulling him into a tight embrace. "I don't want to be with anyone else."

[kirkshouseplant]

Matthew is in fact Bilingual and knows both French and English.

However no one else is aware of this fact except for Francis.

Matthew has some fun with his knowledge of French. As during one of the world meetings when France wasn't there, Matthew showed up in his place.

Everyone could sense something wrong as they were still counting an extra person. So Alfred purposes that they take rollcall.

Matthew answers in French, and at first everyone thinks maybe France was there all along and just didn't say anything.

So they all do a double take and look back and see Matthew, with a giant grin on his face.

"Finally see me, eh?"

Everyone is tripped out for the rest of the meeting.

[over-the-time-flow]

Super Robot Rollcall: The Neo Getter Team

Neo Getter Team

Source Material: Shin Getter Robo vs Neo Getter Robo

Voice Actors:

Go Ichimonji: Takahiro "Cheated on His Wife" Sakurai Sho Tachibana: Yuu Asakawa Gai Daido: Toshiharu Sakurai

Following in the steps of the original Getter team before them, these three youths' dreams shall light the path forward to stand against Emperor Gore's black shadow.

Go is, as we've just seen, a complete outsider, but Sho and Gai have been receiving proper training to be Getter pilots for longer. Together, they fit the three roles the Getter Team always needs: Go is the hotblooded pilot of the Neo Getter-1, Sho is the cool and collected pilot of the Neo Getter-2, and Gai is the large and jolly pilot of the Neo Getter-3.

Ahh, multiseaters. Take a good look at that; three different sets of spirit commands. As a result, there's very little missing! But what IS missing is dearly missed. Mainly, we don't have anything for extended survivability as of right now. What i mean by that is that we have Indomitable, we have Alert, and we have Guts, but we're sorely missing something like Focus or Wall, which we can use preemptively to last longer when we can expect the Getter to be focused upon. Alert and Indomitable, even if cast together, will only be saving you from two attacks, and Guts is worthless if you don't survive the turn in the first place.

As for stats, they're basically what you'd expect if you've played a SRW game before. Go, the Getter-1 pilot, has the best Melee stat, Sho, the Getter-2 pilot, has the best Evasion and Accuracy, and Gai has the best Defense. Nothing groundbreaking here.

Neo Getter Robo

Source Material: Shin Getter Robo vs Neo Getter Robo

Energy Source: Plasma Engine

Heights:

Neo-1: 42 meters Neo-2: 45 meters Neo-3: 40 meters

After the infamous fallout of the (seemingly) final battle between the original Getter Team and the Dinosaur Empire, the Getter laboratories were forced to branch out to other energy sources, as Getter Rays proved too dangerous for the japanese government's liking. After much effort, the Neo Getter is the fruit of research into an alternatively-powered Getter Robo. Though its power is no match for a hypothetical "true" Getter Robo, it'll have to do, so long as we can't justify the risks that go into attempting to harness the Getter Rays' immense power...

Also, as an aside, this is my favorite Getter Robo. All other ones have at least one form i don't particularly care for, but with the Neo, i feel like all three forms hit it out of the park.

The Neo Getter is... serviceable. It seems very solid at first glance, but as you look closer you realize its setbacks; for one, all three forms have rather low stats. Coupled with the aforementioned issues of survivability on the pilot side of things, you can't get too cocky with this thing on the frontlines.

Its other issue is one of post-movement range; across the board, all three forms have a post-movement range of a whopping 3 tiles. You might try and circumvent this issue by making use of Getter-2's incredible movement range, but its frail Armor and mediocre Mobility means you can't really leave it in the frontlines by itself. Further, it's got a B-rank on the Ground, limiting its damage output if the opponent isn't flying. You'll just have to suck it up and cast Accel often.

Also, its firepower in all three forms is rather underwhelming. On top of that, since it has no EN recovery, you'll have to be careful about overusing its already rather modest finishers.

All of these issues most likely stem from its rather slapdash nature. Hayato just needed something out the door to fight the Dinosaur Empire in time for their return. Oh, if only there was a new Getter Robo, that used Getter Rays to their fullest potential... alas, it was not meant to be.

Fun Fact: Emblematic of its position as an amalgamation of both stories, the Neo Getter and its forms take design elements from both the Getter Robo G and the Getter Robo Go.

hd debut when

[kamenriderlogik27]

This week's Saber X Zenkaiger!!!!!

I haven't been doing reviews lately 'cause after I get through 90% of one something happens and it all get's erased somehow and I end up just giving up. So let's hope I can get this done without that happening.

Saber Chapter Special!!!:

asdilfjlasjdfjsiejfl;sjef!!!!! This ep was SO MUCH FUN!!!! Not only is it a PERFECT intro/introduction to what to expect for the crossover film, but I just LOVE that they chose ZOX of all Zenkaiger Charas to be the one to introduce the Bookstore gang to the World of Zenkaiger! Zox just naturally fit right in with the mess and made the plot really smooth! It felt like just another Saber ep with a bit of Kaizoku spizzaz! Also, I knew that Mashiko Atsuki and Aoki Ryo knew each other 'cause of TeniMyu (Not sure if that's how you spell it) so that just makes the connection between their characters way more interesting and cool! (Also, Watching Zox on Zenkaigers always made me think that he was tall, but then seeing him stand next to the giants in Saber just.... I'm sorry I just can't get over how small he looks. He's so cute!!!!) I also loved how they made Zox have no qualms about stealing from Touma and Ryoga. I mean, he did only promise Kaito that he wouldn't steal in the Zenkaiger world so~ XD Another thing! I really loved how we got to see more of Kento's personality in this ep! Honestly, ever since he was introduced, he never really showed much personality outside of him being calm, smiling while doing the book skits with Touma, angry, emo, and in despair. In this ep, we got to see him reading a book, laughing with Touma because of Rintaro and Zox, dumbfounded because of Touma's mistake, trying to be a peace maker and save Touma from Ryoga's wrath due to said mistake, get mad at Orihime World for hurting Mei, be stern with Zox when he believed that Zox stole their WRBs (which, NGL, was really hot), and cutely pet the carousel horse he was riding while going "yoshi yoshi~~~". As you can tell, a lot of my attention is focused on Kento now a days and I just LIVE for learning more about this man's personality. Should I write a separate post about it??? Let me know ya'll!

Kikai Sentai Zenkaiger wa!!!!!!!!!:

again! ajdklfjalsdjfwjefklejfl;waf!!!!! This ep makes me officially love the Shindai siblings! Honestly, it feels like a special atonement mini-arc for them. We got to learn more about them personality wise, and we got to see them interact with people that they most likely NEVER imagined spending time with. Which, honestly I think is awesome because they learned from the Zenkaigers something that they'll probably never forget! Reika finally made a real friend in Magine (which would be so cool if she could become friends with Mei due to this!) (and I'm also so happy for Raika's actress for finally meeting and interacting with Magine!) and Ryoga learned that he can't always protect or think that Reika can't handle herself/isn't strong enough to fight with him. (I also think he learned what it's really like to be a true "big brother" ) Also, I LIVED for Ryoga's reactions to the Zenkaigers! See, this kind of goofiness is what I love. We have the stoic older brother who's always serious and ready to fight, interacting with these colorful, wacky goofballs full of fun. This is the kind of mix that I absolutely LOVE. Especially when they end up having to fight together. Just, that moment where Kaito and the rest were like "Dude! why aren't you doing your rollcall???? Are you shy? C'mon! it's easy! Just say who you are!" As if every single TokuHero does a long rollcall before every battle. And then Ryoga begrudgingly doing it anyway 'cause his new (he'll never admit to this but-) 'friends' have been right so far, so why not join in. And Reika joining Magine in the rollcall 'cause she's the only female Saber Rider and this moment is like every Sentai crossover where they have all the female Rangers fight together with 'girl power!' just, omg their collab fight was so cool!!!!

Alright, enough of the Shindai sibling (sadly) now for the Zenkaigers!!! I LOVED how they were introduced to the Shindai Siblings! Kaito and Juran were just running around, looking for Magine when they literally ran between Ryoga and Reika about to attack Zox. And, instead of questioning why Zox was about to get attacked by these unknown people, or even ask where Zox has been for the past few days, they just start asking Zox if he's seen Magine. And Zox is just like "Dude, I've just came back from a parallel world, there's no way I would've seen her." Just, omgosh I love Zox. And then when Ryoga finally attacks, Kaito's just like "Zox!!!! WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO?!?!" instantly knowing that it's Zox's fault they're in this new mess. One main thing that I loved about this ep was how we see more of Zox's personality (I just love analyzing personalities ok?) ok, hear me out. I know there are times where we see Zox get protective of Flint and the twins when they're in trouble, or worried about them if they're in danger. But I feel like this is the first real time we see him actually... I don't know what word to use... not really admit but... maybe a mix of show and admit about how much he loves and cherishes them? He tried to be nonchalant about it in front of Ryoga, but then when he get's back on his ship, he not only looks worried about Flint, but also SOUNDS worried. I love this 'cause it says a lot about Zox I think. Like, out of all the characters in Zenkaiger, Zox knows what it's like to not have been able to protect some one and regret it (his brothers) and I think he's scared that Flint might suffer the same fate too in a way if he's not careful. Plus, the older brother combi-finisher was really awesome!

Over all, I'm soooooooooo happy that they gifted us with these amazing special eps!!!!!! Even though they just make me want to watch the crossover film even more, I'm so happy that we get to be blessed with these preview interactions! I wonder how they'll tie these in with the film though.... will Touma and the rest recognize Zox in the film?? Will Kaito and the Kikainoids see Ryoga again and be all like "Ryoga!!! long time no see!!" and just completely shock the Saber team when Ryoga greets them back as if he was actually happy to see them again? (omgosh that'd be so cool!) Anyway, sorry that this was so long. I just had a lot of thoughts about these eps and I really wanted to share them! Also, can we keep the "why are you dancing?!" skit for Zox in the movie? Or like, actually have Zox reply to Rintaro or Kento if they ask? or would that be too lame.... hmm.... I just want more of that content~~~~

What did ya'll think about these eps? I'd love to know!

[i-did-not-mean-to]

Back to school - Chapter 3 - Kira

So, my first short AU has turned into a soap opera really fast...

Here's another Kira chapter...❤️👩🏻‍🏫

Fandom : The Hobbit

Characters : Oh everyone

Rating : Gen up to now

Warnings: Turns a bit dark, a tad of crying, histrionics and it's a dilettantish attempt at an AU

Kira watched them walk away, the new kid almost tripping over his own feet trying to catch up with that monstrosity of a teenager stomping away moodily.

She remembered vaguely what it had been like to be this young and to stumble upon a pretty face that hit one unawares like a right hook into the jaw; and, just as she had that thought, one of those faces appeared just above her.

“Miss Kira, I see you’re still hale.” That man had a voice like running rivers, cold and beautiful, Kira thought. As beautiful as her new colleague, Thranduil, was, she distrusted him instinctively. There seemed to be a lack of that kindness in him that she had come to expect in a teacher.

“Why wouldn’t I be?” She snapped, exhausted from this first day of work and troubled by all the secrets flitting around and nipping at her skin. “You’ve got the trash class.” He shrugged, his perfectly toned shoulders heaving with disgusting elegance and poise. Why could he not be as ugly as his words? It would make disliking him so much easier!

His freaking son was in that class, Kira thought, for crying out loud. How could anyone be that facetious?

“I’d be ever so grateful if you could refrain from making remarks such as these.” Her tone could grow just as cold and sharp as his, she decided. “Oh, you’ve warmed up to them, have you?”

There was a flash of something behind the obvious mockery; for a moment, Kira thought she had seen a hint of surprised joy, but the spark was gone before she could hold on to it or commit it to memory.

“They have been very nice. Your son has a rare talent for drawing.” She replied, carefully. “He’s a nitwit.”

Bitterness, Kira could taste it on her tongue as if that man in front of her was literally spewing acid. He was disappointed, but whether it was himself or that sweet-tempered boy of his who caused him such distress, Kira could not yet tell.

“He is not and you’re an asshole for saying so.” The words were out of her mouth before she could bite them back.

Wonderful, she had met exactly 3 other adults this far and she had managed to insult one of them to their face within the first day of her arriving at her new post. Kira deserved an award for hasty reactions that would lead to trouble and pain.

One thick eyebrow lifted with agonising slowness until it reached its zenith in a perfectly calm face.

“Strong words.” A drawling snarl, devoid of bite or anger; he seemed rather amused by her outburst that coloured her cheeks a flaming red and made her eyes shine with a ferocious fire. Kira liked to think that she looked intimidating or fierce, but she was old enough to be aware that she actually resembled a young girl running a fever when she got angry.

His eyes shifted into something that was now definitely mournful as he told her that there were many things she didn’t know and, with a sharp sadness, he added: “Maybe, someone with a soft heart like yours should not have come here.”

Bristling, she got up and pushed past him into the school building.

Who was he to tell her where she was to go or not? He knew nothing about her either, or about the things she had done and seen in her life. A soft heart, pfff, indeed.

Making her way through the halls and corridors, and getting turned around only twice, she finally entered the small administration office where a handsome woman with long, black hair was clacking away on her keyboard.

“I am…I have…I am new here and I’d like to see the files of the class I’ve been given.” Kira announced, rather badly, and the woman looked up with a disinterested face. “Which class would that be?”

Damn, she didn’t even know the name of the class, for she was sure that DD was not the official code. “Mister Gandalf’s class? I’ve taken over for Mister Smaug.” She mumbled, hoping that the lady would know which class she was talking about without her having to confess that she was a terrible teacher who had not done a rollcall or learned what the official denomination of her class was.

“You poor dear, how much time do you have?” The woman gave a wry chuckle. “Time?” Kira cocked her head.

“Go through to the library, I’ll bring you the files.” She patted Kira’s hand, lying cramped on the little counter before her. Those treacherous hands, she thought, always clenching without her knowledge, and betraying her inner turmoil.

As she sat in a corner of the library, she thought back on her first day: her colleague was like an ice-king from a fairy tale, cold and beautiful, and her class turned out to be a bunch of grumpy misfits.

Well no, only the two tall boys, the other ones seemed agreeable enough, but Kira was not used to scowling teenagers. It made her feel ill at ease and unwelcome; everything in this place made her feel unwelcome and she had half a mind to go home again and call it a day.

She had tried, but there was no place for her, not here, not anywhere else.

The door opened and the woman from before shoved a document cart piled high with folders in.

“You’re new to the town too, aren’t you?” The woman nodded slowly when Kira admitted that she was. “You and the curly boy, you don’t even know what mess you’ve gotten yourself into.”

Making a non-committal gesture, Kira encouraged her to go on. “You’ve met Dwalin and Thorin, I expect. They’re the local troublemakers. Hmmmm…” The woman pulled out a chair from under a deserted table and leant against it as if she couldn’t bear to sit down for this story.

“Their family, Thorin’s parents to be exact, they had a business. Beautiful it was. It burned down…some say, Smaug, the former teacher was behind it. We don’t know. There was some point of contention between them, but…”

“What about Thranduil?” Kira asked, the question falling from her numb lips.

“Oh…he…it was a beautiful business as I said and there have been important possessions of his lost in the fire. It…it is a time ago now. Thorin’s father has disappeared, you know, and Thranduil thinks he might have taken off with the most valuable parts. I don’t know if that’s true.”

The woman bit her lip, she knew she was gossiping, but she obviously thought that Kira had a right to know those things. Probably, she wanted to chase her away, but with every word, Kira’s faltering resoluteness firmed up again.

“Who is taking care of them? They’re kids.” Kira cried out, horrified by what she was hearing.

“Older cousins; they’re a strange clan. Secretive. Weird. Hostile. Thorin should have graduated, but he sticks around for his sister. Thranduil is her headteacher.” The woman sighed heavily. “We’re all one tangle of resentment and hate here.”

A fire, Kira thought, a future gone up in flames, a legacy fallen to ashes.

“What kind of person was this Smaug?” She then prodded on, curious about her predecessor.

“Smaug? Sly, charming, wickedly smart, very cunning…and dark. Oh, Kira, can I call you Kira? Leave girl, there is nothing here for you. Smaug and Thranduil? They survived here because their hearts have turned to stone a long time ago. The kids will hurt you; destruction is all they know.” She took a deep breath.

“Those children were raised on hatred, they absorbed distrust at their mother’s tit, they suckled on hostility. They will take everything from you if you let them.” The woman tapped the folders on the cart.

“I’m telling you, you don’t need to know. Leave this place. There’s too much death around here.”

Everything in Kira revolted.

“What made people that hard and bitter?” She asked, breathless with shock and pity.

“Loss. If you lose someone you love, you seek for culprits and there are more than enough potential candidates around here.”

Kira thought of young Bilbo’s flush, of Thorin’s shy smile and Legolas’ beautiful drawing, and grabbed the first one of the folders resolutely. “I have nothing to lose.” She whispered and plunged into the heart-breaking life story of one Tauriel; a girl who had impressed her with zealous interest and brave kindness.

The woman left and soon after, the door to the library was shoved open again and Gandalf strolled in, his grey wool cardigan stained with chalk and his beard hiding a sad smile.

“You’ve taken an interest in them, I see.” He said in a low voice, but his presence startled Kira so much that she uttered a frightened yelp. “Yes, yes, I wanted to know what all this talk of hate was about.”

Kira set aside the folder she had been browsing. “You have been crying.” Gandalf said softly, handing her a handkerchief and sitting down on the discarded chair the administrator had left pulled out.

She sniffed; she had just found out that the sweet-tempered blonde boy, son of the imperious colleague with the amazingly beautiful eyes, was semi-orphaned. His report cards said he was dumb, slow to understand and illiterate, but Kira had seen him read. All the notes about him betrayed a sense of impatience and exasperation that must have heightened the pressure on the poor kid, she thought. It was hard enough to be another teacher’s son, did people have to expect so much of a boy his age?

“Come, I’ll invite you to a milkshake, Miss Kira.” Gandalf extended his hand with the same natural friendliness as he had when handing her a handkerchief earlier. “Ah, you’ve kept the worst one for last.” He tapped on the thick folder bearing Thorin’s name.

Kira didn’t want to admit it, but she was frightened. The woman had been partly right and there was a lot of darkness in this town; shady things had happened, and Kira was unable to comprehend how people could burden mere children with past grievances they had not been a part of.

“There’s a little shop just down the main road.” Gandalf was chattering gently, shoving the last file into her satchel, and steering her out of the gloomy library carefully. “It will do you good to get out of this building.”

When she saw the blinking lights, her eyes burned and she wondered how long she had been sitting in the dark library, crying helplessly over the fate of children she had only met today.

“Miss Kira!” A honey-coloured mop of hair appeared in her blurry field of vision, and she was tempted to sling her arms around Bilbo. “Bilbo…” She sighed. “Oh, have you been crying?” Bilbo looked up, alarmed and worried.

“I’m okay, kiddo, it’s all fine.” She lied, she knew it and so did Bilbo.

“Oh, that girl over there, that’s Thorin’s sister.” Gandalf whispered into her ear. Kira looked up only to see the beautiful creature that had been with mopey Dwalin before class. She should have known, Kira thought, now that she saw them together, it was as clear as day that they were related.

“God, they’re such charming children.” Kira sighed under her breath. “Isn’t he just?” Bilbo sighed along, blushing a dark pink under Kira’s gaze that had snapped back to him. Kira didn’t know what this town’s ideas and beliefs were on that kind of crush; she had not been here long enough to gauge how people reacted to single women and same-sex couples, but it was clear that Bilbo himself felt terrible about his own words.

Kira wondered if there was no hairdresser in town, all the haircuts she had seen this far were exceptionally long and flowy, or awful like Ori’s, and the fact that half of all the people she had met this far were cramped into the small ice-cream shop reminded her of the woman’s words. They really were all packed one on top of another, all the time, no wonder there were frictions and animosities.

“Hello, are you the new teacher?” Kira snapped out of her reverie to be confronted with the fresh face of a young girl who looked up at her expectantly. “You sure are pretty.” She went on, which made Kira blush.

“I am Dís, I’ll introduce myself, old Thrandy interrupted me before and…my brother is useless.” She had the most dazzling smile, small dimples to either side of her generous mouth that was so unlike the grim line of her brother’s and eyes like a summer sky. She was the first happy person she had met, Kira realised, and her eyes flew to Thorin who observed them with meticulous sharpness.

His baby sister, of course, he’d throttle me on the spot if I threatened the girl in any way.

“I am…the new teacher. I’m not so sure about the pretty part.” Kira murmured, unsure how to proceed with Bilbo and the girl both now staring up at her as if she owed them some kind of explanation or answer to a question nobody had asked.

“Was Thorin very gruesome?” Dís asked with a mix of morbid pleasure and honest worry. Kira saw Bilbo flinch; so this was how they would handle things, she thought, Bilbo and her would be more or less mockingly warned so as to counteract every single potential disappointment…or expectation.

Squaring her shoulders, Kira lifted her chin and replied: “No, I expect great things of the young man.”

An eerie silence fell over the group and Kira could feel Gandalf stiffen just behind her; he was hovering in the door as if to keep her from retreating. Little did he know that Kira usually met her fears head-on, she would not back out of a shop because she happened upon a group of students; not even when it was obvious that she had been crying.

“Nothing ever happens here, so tell me, what did you think of old Thrandy? He was certainly flushed and a little grumpier than usual…” Dís had an infectious smile, Kira thought as she felt her own lips being pulled up by an unseen and unfathomable force. “Mister Thranduil was…very courteous.” She replied weakly, remembering with painful clarity how she had called him an asshole in the least civil display of discontentment possible, short of shoving him outright.

The idea of shoving someone that tall and strong made her giggle under her breath.

“He doesn’t like us much.” Dís said it off-handedly, but Kira had been a teacher for too long not to notice the tiny quiver that made her smile blur for a second. Once again, Kira wanted to protest and assuage the girl’s pain, but what did she really know? She had only arrived in this clusterfuck of a town.

“Do you think…could you like us? Please?” Her huge eyes shone like headlights. She looked so much like her brother, only softer, more open, and much more vulnerable. It was the age, Kira thought, it was the fact that he had always held his hand over her and, right now, he bulldozed towards them.

“Dís…leave the woman alone.” He gave her an apologetic smile; begging for affection was beneath his dignity apparently, so Kira turned her attention back to the girl and sighed: “I’m doing my utter best.”

“We’re not so bad, really. Don’t…don’t believe what people say.” She tapped her finger against the folder sticking out of Kira’s satchel. Her brother’s name was clearly visible and, unlike Kira, Dís seemed to know exactly what lay between the faded grey layers of cardboard.

“Dís, that is enough. Leave her be.” Thorin repeated, trying to pry his sister away. “Don’t mind her.” He said to Kira.

“Let go of me, you stupid oaf. How many times have you cornered old Thrandy in the hallway on my behalf? Can I not, for once, speak up for you?” Her eyes were flaming with blue fire now, reminding Kira of a copper flame.

“Don’t…don’t believe what people say, I can only ask you to make up your own mind. Both of you…” Dís then addressed both Bilbo and Kira who exchanged a puzzled look. “I don’t know anything about the idle tittle-tattle of the town.” Bilbo puffed up his chest and made a small gesture of dismissal.

Kira, on the other hand, did not know what to say. As a professional, she was bound to put at least some faith in the words of her colleagues and her predecessor; she knew teenagers to be manipulative, potentially mean-spirited, and profoundly selfish beings. It would have been more careful to heed the warnings others had given her.

“So…about your milkshake?” Gandalf prompted her from behind and Kira thought that she needed something stronger than a milkshake tonight to get settled into bed, but she would not get shit-faced in front of the students.

“The strawberry one is good.” Bilbo offered. Her eyes slid over the sign hanging on the wall.

“Chocolate-Mint?” She turned to Gandalf. “Unusual.” He commented. “Nobody likes that much.” He made a face.

“I am not everybody else…and I do.” Kira replied firmly and followed the man to the counter to escape the students.

The whole town seemed strangely informal to her and yet, there were so many things she could not quite understand, as if there was a deeper, darker truth hidden behind every brazen interaction.

“I see Thorin has taken a shine to the new kid.” Gandalf commented in a low voice when he returned with their drinks to the little booth Kira had taken in the meantime, far away from the kids, in a quiet corner. “At this time, he’s usually in the little hardware shop his family keeps.”

Kira could hear that Gandalf was trying to tell her something, but her head was still fuzzy with second-hand pain and first-rate confusion. “You’ll fit right in with us, I think.” Gandalf went on, nodding at her bare hands. No rings. For a woman her age, it was rare, and as her colleague and superior, he of course knew that she had come here alone.

No husband. No children. No emergency contact either.

“Young Bilbo is an orphan.” He murmured on. “There are too many orphans in this town.” Kira replied tonelessly.

“It wasn’t always like that…It won’t be like that forever.” Gandalf said and she had to believe in the faith vibrating strong in his voice. Of course, it wouldn’t stay like that, Kira thought, they would grow up and if this place was not right for them, they would find another one.

She drank her milkshake slowly, eager and reticent at the same time to take a look at that last file in her satchel. Her mind was full of what other people had told her: her colleagues, the administrator, that girl…

When she dared glance over, she saw Bilbo laughing at something Dís had said, and it seemed like the ghost of a smile danced on Thorin’s face. God, there were so many open scowls and just as many aborted smiles in this town.

“Are they…” Kira started to voice her concerns, but relapsed into silence, it was none of her business.

“Are they what, dear? Allowed to flirt? I’d hope so, these things come easier to the younger generation.” Gandalf tapped the side of his nose as if he knew that she was hopeless in the romantic department.

“I don’t need to know.” She said hastily, almost tipping over her empty glass as she got up and grabbed her satchel.

“Kira? You will soon learn that there is no escaping “knowing” in this town. I am so sorry, but you’ll eventually have to choose a side. Will you take the easy path?”

She froze.

“Here, take this. I’ll see you at work. Tomorrow.” He handed her yet another handkerchief, a beautiful, delicate thing that had no business being in the possession of a slightly scatter-brained, decidedly masculine headteacher.

“I bought it in the emporium that once was.” Gandalf said with a sad smile. “Before the fire.” Kira answered tonelessly.

“Thranduil said that someone with my soft heart should not be here.” She felt like telling on the colleague, but the recollection of his words cut deep, and she needed some kind of reassurance.

“Thranduil believes softness to be weakness. Do you have a strong heart, Kira?”

She did not know how to answer that question; it was novel to her, nobody had ever asked her anything remotely as confusing and irrelevant. She had never had any medical problems of the cardiovascular variety, but she doubted that this was the meaning he had been trying to convey.

“We’ll find out soon enough.” He grinned and when the door swung open, he sat back and waited.

“Miss Kira.” Already, she recognised the shy, quiet quality of the voice that reminded her of those wispy curtains her aunt Imelda used to have in her living room and that had ended up torn to shreds by her vicious Siamese cats.

“Legolas.” She turned around, satchel in hand, only to find her face almost pressed into the perfectly starched button-down of someone who has definitely not the nearly translucent boy.

“Mister…” – “If you can call me asshole, you can call me Thranduil.” His voice cut like a well-honed blade, slicing easily and elegantly through her defences…No jagged edges, no serrated indentations…Acid running like water and leaving nothing but burning pain behind.

She was tempted to call him asshole again, but she clenched her teeth before bowing her head slowly.

All the kids eyes were glued to her now; she could feel the prickling heat of their gaze on her neck. “Good evening. I’m on my way home.” She said courteously and tried to push past them.

“Legolas, go sit with your classmates, I’ll walk your teacher home.” Thranduil declared with icy determination.

“Why? What danger could lurk in the shadows for me when clearly, everyone is here?” Kira snapped.

“No, he’s right. It is not safe.” She had not noticed that the students had come up behind her, but she could hear that it pained Thorin to the core of his heart to admit that the hated teacher was, for once, not completely wrong.

“Stay with your classmates, Legolas, I will walk Miss Kira home.” Thranduil repeated and Legolas shuffled his feet for a moment before being pulled away by Bilbo. He didn’t get along with his classmates, Kira knew, but the fact that Thorin had not objected, told her that they all agreed to this plan.

Kira could not fathom what peril could hide in this sleepy, little town other than being smitten by a lightning bolt made of pure contempt and hatred, but when Thranduil held the door open for her, she moved outside readily enough.

For a while, they walked in resentful silence, each one thinking about the angry words that had been uttered between them. “I took…” She started, but he waved her words aside. “I know where you live.”

Of course, he knew. Everyone knew. Maybe, she’d be murdered in her sleep by the cloud of ominous darkness hovering over every square inch of this godforsaken place.

“Lock your door and say your prayers.” He mumbled, looking tired all of a sudden, as if the polish had worn away and washed off and all that was left was a middle-aged man who was alone in the world with a child he could not understand and a bunch of neighbours he didn’t like.

“If you see a fiery red sports car…” he started and waved her past her own building and towards a small corner shop.

“If ever anything feels amiss, you call Gandalf, the school, me…and you come here.” He went on insistently.

“Thranduil.” Another man stepped out, his eyes cautious and guarded as they fell on her tall companion. “Balin, this is Miss Kira. She’s your boys’ new teacher.”

The older cousin then, Kira thought, barely older. Where were the women in this town? Where were the mothers?

“It was mighty good of you to take her home.” Balin nodded slowly, giving Kira an appraising look.

“Now, look here lass, if anything happens, you come here.” – “What should happen?” Kira wanted to laugh, but she remembered: there had been a terrible fire, a man had disappeared, a car had been damaged, mothers had been lost. She was an outsider, and she knew nothing of the things that haunted these people.

“If he comes back.” Balin just replied and Kira was surprised at the grave nod Thranduil gave as a reply.

“Who? Smaug? What kind of guardians are you if you let someone that dangerous be alone with your little ones?” Kira exploded. “Little ones? Have you seen Thorin and Dwalin? They’re hardly little ones.” Balin laughed heartily.

“He held sway, let’s put it like that, and we could not dislodge him against his will.” Thranduil explained suavely.

“Not that you’ve tried really hard.” Balin mumbled into his beard.

“He was a fucking menace; he’s done terrible harm to those children!” Kira could not fathom how they could be so calm about that. “Aye, that’s a grief we all have to live with. I don’t think he’d come back, but if he does…well, we’ll know how to deal with him.” Balin said with pride in his voice.

“I’d rather let him tear me limb from limb than expose any of my students to that monster ever again!” Kira could feel the tears of anger and helpless indignation threaten to dash her brittle voice to pieces.

“You’re a fiery one, lass, I’ll give you that. Maybe, we all need more of this around here.” Balin chuckled and gave her a card. “Oi, Miss Kira, everything alright?” Dwalin came out, his hands covered in dark dust and his face glistening with sweat.

“Yes, I am fine. Suffocating on so much testosterone, but I am alright. One would think some evil power would send ghouls and dragons after me as soon as I step out alone.” She chuckled under her breath.

“Don’t wander around alone too much. I trust Thorin and Dís have taken care of the new kid?” Dwalin nodded when Kira’s eyes widened. They were being herded like sheep. With a tiny nod of the head, Dwalin and, what Kira surmised must have been his older brother, returned to their shop.

“They’re distasteful people, but they can protect you. We’re just up there.” Thranduil accompanied her back to her own suite of flats, pointing at a small rise where a beautiful white mansion peeked out from a patch of dark trees.

“Don’t call them distasteful.” Kira grumbled. “Lady, you call people assholes.” He reminded her.

“I’ll never live that one down.” She said through gritted teeth. “No, you won’t. We have a long memory when it comes to grievances and offenses.” It didn’t sound like a threat, there was no anger or even hurt in his voice; he was merely stating facts.

Rolling her eyes at him, she jangled her keys and made her way into the building. All of this was completely ludicrous, but she locked her door twice and fastened the bolt as well before taking off her shoes and cuddling up on the small sofa.

Kira wished she had someone to talk to, someone who would be interested in her first day at work and who would laugh and groan with her about that absurdly handsome, stuck-up, judgemental, overly sensitive colleague of hers whose eyes made her wish for summer and picnics outside.

Also, she yearned for someone to hold her as she opened the thick file and leafed through records of detentions and disciplinary procedures until she came to a clear line in Thorin’s academic career: he had been a good student, wild and impatient but also diligent and gifted, up to a certain point and only after that had he turned into a teacher’s nightmare.

Kira rubbed her eyes, she could barely believe that those words, “dangerous”, “vicious”, “devious”, “insane”, should be applied to a man that young. Thinking back, she saw a hunched-over youth, uncomfortable in his skin, wary, and definitely traumatised; she had never had the feeling that he had been threatening her in any way though.

One thing was for sure, Mister Smaug had hated the kid and he had not missed a single opportunity to make his life miserable, going as far as scribbling defamatory notes about Thorin’s family into the official records.

Piecing together what she could glimpse by reading between the lines, the family had built an emporium, but the grandfather’s megalomania had attracted the wrong kind of attention, and everything had literally gone up in flames. The father had disappeared, leaving the son to bear the burden of a reputation of being a greedy, thieving beggar – born and bred.

Nobody could see her now, so Kira lay down her head and cried.

It had been only one day, and already, she had no idea what to do and how to go on in this quagmire of secrets and lies.

Her mind wandered back to those fresh faces, to the willingness of Tauriel and Ori to work, to Bilbo’s calling out to her to give her opinion, to Legolas’ pride over a drawing, to Thorin’s and Dwalin’s surprising protectiveness, and she knew that even if Smaug came back and set her ravishing asshole of a colleague on fire in front of her eyes, what really mattered were the children. She would try her best to make a difference…at least for those who might change the fate of the world…in time.