#folk song paragraph for class 12

[coffeeandcalligraphy]

A chatty writing update | novels, short fiction, etc!

Hi folks!

It’s been a while since I last wrote an update on this blog! I thought it’d be fun to go back to basics, and just talk about writing. This post chats about: new plans for Feeding Habits, my newest novel, my short story goals & growing collection, along with process reflections.

(image description: a photo of green leaves with the text “writing update” in a white font written on top. /end image description)

Post starts under the cut!

General taglist (please ask to be added or removed)

@if-one-of-us-falls, @qatarcookie, @chloeswords, @alicewestwater, @laughtracksonata, @shylawrites, @ev–writes, @jaydewritesfiction, @jennawritesstories @eowynandfaramir, @august-iswriting, @aetherwrites, @avakrahn, @maisulli

What have I been up to?

For starters, I finished my second year of my Writing undergrad last week and got two of my final grades back today (A+ baby)! For anyone who has taken online university, y’all already KNOW, but this year was so difficult. Would not recommend! Really proud of myself to have gotten through this absolute rollercoaster of a school term and am excited to get into some writing. That leads us to:

What have I been up to (writing edition)?

2021 started off so fast. By the time January hit, I was so consumed in my new semester that I did not have time to write Feeding Habits (my novel). In the first few days of the term, I managed to write between class, until I could no longer keep up! Essentially, I did not write any of that novel until exam season (last week), where I did manage to get in about 3k words in ~4 days.

Feeding Habits

I’m currently drafting what I believe will be the last chapter of this book (chapter 10: Swan Song). This chapter is so bizarre for a few reasons. It begins the book’s third part and also marks the shift back into Lonan’s head from Harrison’s. I originally thought this part would be much, much longer, with at least another five chapters to go, but quickly realized the book’s content was nearly completed. In my 4 day 3k palooza, I hit 50k in the book (the word count goal), and couldn’t see myself extending past 60k. Since then, I’ve made the loose decision to write this final chapter as a ~novella. Here are a few reasons why:

1. This chapter is structurally very strange.

I unashamedly shift from present to past to present to past past, and so much more every 12 words. I mapped out the timeline on a sheet of paper, and there were over 20 shifts in scenes (the chapter is only about 4400 words at the moment). The fictive past is incredibly important to this chapter, more important than the present, and I thought it would make more sense to not break randomly for a chapter so I could upkeep the consistent inconsistency of the chapter.

2. The chapter is very abstract

This stems from the structural changes, but there are paragraphs in this chapter of the fictive present that are loosely based in reality. They’re more poems than they are factual paragraphs, and keeping them all contained in one place (so a mega chapter/ novella) would reduce the most confusion!

3. There’s not much left to cover

Like I said above, Feeding Habits is on its last leg, lol! I know exactly where the book needs to end up, which is very, very soon from where I’m currently at on the timeline. Swan Song should cover what 2-4 chapters would cover in terms of arcs.

Feeding Habits and I have a really weird relationship, tbh! When I realized a few weeks ago that it’d been over a year since I started the book, I realized I just needed to finish it. Not that I want to rush (because I’ve taken longer than a year to write a book in the past), but that in order to move onto another project, I’d like to put this one behind first. This book has been the hardest thing I’ve ever written, and has reminded me there’s always a time to let go. This sort of scrounges up a conversation about letting this entire series go, which is certainly something I’ve been contemplating doing soon(ish). If this spinoff series gets a third book, that may or may not be the last Fostered book for a very long time (or ever)! There are many complex reasons to move on, but the main one is that I have other projects I’d like to focus on. This is not a definitive decision, but something I’ve certainly been thinking about!

Here are a few excerpts I wrote recently:

(TW: death, gore)

Dying feels like being a trout dangled out of water. Clinging to a hook. Mouth open. Scales iridescent in a final death cry. It’s like blood spurting up the knuckles, drowning out the flesh. It’s that moment on the long fall down when the clouds cup the body. Easy drifting. The sound a skull makes when it cracks is really just the afterthought.

(TW: death, gore)

Kill shot. Death blow. Coup de grace. Right in the heart. He feels it. The blood swelling, slicking his palms. He can do it. Reach into the cavity. Feel for the ribs. Part each bone. Then cup the humming heart. Stay there. Right. It’s never been easier.

Look at this PURE moment of Lonan holding a baby I CANNOT:

The grocery store was a fifteen-minute walk away. With Olivia clinging to his shoulder, Lonan was acutely aware that she could feel his heartbeat. Open valve. Close. Repeat. Hers pulsed right above his, a miniature drumming. The sky had bruised purple, misted with clouds. The evening air nipped his cheeks, so he made sure Olivia was securely fastened between him and his jacket. With wide eyes, she absorbed the drowsy suburbia, all its family cars pulling into driveways, all its couples heading back home after a sunset walk. When Lonan passed a young boy walking two golden retrievers, Olivia giggled, and didn’t stop, even after he’d spent fifty dollars on groceries and nearly the rest on a red Corolla marked with a MUST GO NOW sign outside a convenience store.

Let’s move on!

Mandy and Cora

I said I wouldn’t talk too much about this project, but I just love it so much?? I wanted to share my SUPER early thoughts on drafting a novel, especially one that is SO different from what I’ve been writing recently. I talked about this before in THIS post, but the summary about this project is that it’s a YA contemporary novel! Can’t believe I’m writing YA again, it’s been so long, but I also think it’s going so well. Everything I’ve learned as a literary fiction writer has been a fantastic primer for transferring back to the genre. Admittedly, I have not written much, but I’m having a lot of fun diving back into a lighter project. This is the summary:

Cora and Mandy are identical twins who’ve always done everything together. But when Mandy decides to go to university out of province after graduation and Cora doesn’t, Cora takes this as an opportunity to “test run” life apart from her sister for the first time by spending the summer at her aunt’s house across the country.

I have come up with a few ~things since I last talked about this project, mostly how I’d like to structure it. As of now, I’d like the book to be structured super loosely. I’m really pulling on a lot of inspo from “We Are Okay” by Nina LaCour (which is SO good), particularly how “nothing happens-y” that book is. This project (which I still need a title for!!) will be structured in short chapters that cover something Cora does on her own for the first time (without Mandy). For example, a few ideas are “Flight”, “Lunch”, and “Groceries”. “Flight” is the first “chapter” (they’re really kind of vignettes) where Cora flies to her aunt’s house. I still can’t determine if this book will take place in Canada. On one hand, I feel like there will be a wider audience if it takes place in the US (is that just an assumption??? maybe?? someone let me know!), but also: don’t really care too much about an audience at the moment! It could also take place in Canada (So Ontario and British Columbia). But if it does take place in the US, I think it may take place in NYC and San Francisco. The problem is: I really don’t like researching lol, and while I’ve been to NYC many times, I will definitely write it wrong! Does this really matter on a first draft?? absolutely not lol, but of course I am already overthinking!

But back to structure: I am looking forward to seeing what this looser structure will do. This is a story that is solely around one half of a set of twins learning to be her own person (and ultimately that she doesn’t have to completely forget her sister in order to do that), and as a twin who KNOWS this feeling, I think this structure of her doing things for the first time is SUPER relatable.

I was worried it might sound silly/worrying to others who are not twins that Cora hadn’t done things like “lunch” or “groceries” on her own, but I feel this so much as an identical twin myself! Not that she hasn’t done anything at all by herself, but as a twin, when you do something without your twin for the first few times, at least in my experience, you notice. If any twins are reading this--weigh in!

This story is the most personal thing I’ve ever written. It definitely is an OwnVoices book! Usually, I avoid details that are remotely similar to me because they make me uncomfortable haha, but with this book, it’s all me, lol! The characters are all Guyanese, which is SO fun because I’ve been planning what they eat (my fellow Caribbean peeps know: the FOOD!), which is so fun (yes they have pumpkin and shrimp, yes they have roti, yes they have pera, yes they have mithai). Every time I’ve gone to dabble at this book, or even think about it, I get incredibly emotional for this reason? I don’t exactly know why. I think this is a story I just so want to tell, with the culture I love SO much that I definitely struggled to love as a child. This is reclamation bitchessss!

Not going to lie tho: the prospect of writing ~a book~ is kind of freaky! I’m going to make the minimum word count for this book pretty short (50k) and see where it goes from there. I think I will focus on this project this summer! Originally I was going to write a literary novel this summer, but I think this one’s calling my name!

Here’s a pretty rough excerpt:

Try. I remind myself that’s what I’m doing after the flight attendant fills me a disposable cup of Coca Cola and all I can think of is Mandy and I shoving Mentos into a bottle of the stuff when we were twelve. Just me, wedged in the middle seat between an exchange student heading out for summer break and a middle-aged woman sipping a cocktail, thinking of Mandy and I bursting whole oranges in a blender when we were bored one Winter break as the plane dips through a wave of turbulence. Mandy and I dying our hair neon green with highlighters (didn’t work—our hair is too dark) as the plane lands on the tarmac. Mandy and I arguing so loud last month, we both lost our voices as I lug my carry-on out of the overhead compartment and shuffle off the plane and through the airport, searching for Aunt Vel.

Short Fiction

I’ve written so much short fiction this year! I have a goal to write a short story a month (they can range in length, as long as 1 is “complete”), so my short story brain has seriously been soaking it all up lately. Let’s chat my month to month breakdown so far:

January:

I wrote four stories in January! The first is a flash fiction piece called “Shark Swimming” that follows a young woman who attends a shark swimming class after breaking up with her girlfriend. I wrote this story for a “test” workshop for my fiction class, and it was based off the prompt “think about something you’re afraid to do and make the character do that thing”. I’m not particularly afraid of sharks, but had been wanting to use the title “Shark Swimming” for AGES (literally since 2018).

This story is one of my favourites. It’s only about 900 words, but I think there’s something profound in how mundanely specific it is. The entire story doesn’t even see the narrator swim with sharks once; it actually takes place fully in the sanctuary’s lobby. But I really love this narrator. This is the first story I’ve written in second person in a while, though I felt really connected to the unnamed narrator. She struggles with accepting that she truly is a “boring” person, and there’s something about the final image that really gets me!

I’ve been submitting this around, though it’s been rejected a handful of times. Hoping I can secure it at a magazine one day because I really love it!

The second story is “Joanne, I’ll Pray for You” which is actually a rewrite of one of my very first short stories (the first story I did not write for a class haha), “NYC in Your Apartment”. I LOVE this rewrite a lot, and also learned the original is not a very good short story! Revising this story taught me just how much I’ve learned in the 2 years I’ve been writing short fiction. Seeing the 2019 version versus the 2021 version side by side is fascinating because I essentially “gutted’ the 2019 version of its beginning and end until all that was left was the middle of the story (aka the actual story). AKA: this is the only story I’ve ever written with a hopeful ending and I cut out all the happy bits lol I am SO sorry (that arc is more for a novel or novella). That’s how this went from a 5k word story to an 1800 word story (my Submittable thanks me for this lol). A lot of details and scenes I included were more pertinent to a 3 act structure/novel, which of course short stories don’t often have because of their brevity. I love rambling about writing theory, and seeing that actually pay off is so fascinating!

(TW: trauma)

Like the original, this story follows Joanne, a woman in her early twenties, who spontaneously breaks up with her boyfriend. She claims the poltergeist haunting her drove her to this decision. The original draft focused a lot more on the traumatic events Joanne survives, but this draft really loosens them up. It focuses less so on the events themselves, and more on how Joanne’s life is affected. I found the details of these events were less important, and even sort of contradicted Joanne’s insistence she is being haunted. Instead, the poltergeist really takes more precedence in the new draft as a force Joanne doesn’t understand. That ambiguity, I think, is what the story truly needed.

I also centralized Joanne’s relationship with her boyfriend, Julian, here. Now don’t get me wrong, I really didn’t add anything to this draft. It was a matter of trimming the fat around it to leave the lean “meat” in the centre. But by removing that fat, I was able to emphasize what was most important here, and that was her relationship. Julian always played a really big role in the original draft, but I feel like his role as both a friend and partner to Joanne is much more emphasized since this draft literally is only two scenes now. Because there is less, there is more room for Joanne to reflect, which I’m happy about!

A final change I made was the setting and therefore the title. The original, which was “NYC in Your Apartment,” I couldn’t keep because I shifted the setting to Toronto (this is how I originally saw it, but in 2019 I just?? couldn’t?? write?? canlit??), and “Toronto in Your Apartment” sounded sort of gross LOL. The new title comes from a line in the story which I think is more relevant to the themes!

The next short story I wrote in January was “How to Spell Alpaca.” This one is super fun because I wrote it SO fast (in about 15 minutes or so). THIS is the writing update if you’re interested in learning more. I talked extensively about this one in that update, but some developments are that I dove into an edit a few weeks ago to really understand the core of the story. I’m still not quite there (this is just an intuitive feeling; I know not everything has “clicked), but I am really intrigued by the two mothers in the story, the narrator, and her newfound acquaintance, Violet. Both really struggle to understand their place as mothers (the narrator even declares she isn’t a mother anymore). The narrator, who is in her 50s, sees herself in Violet, who is much younger (~20s), and so she views Violet’s relationship with her daughter in a cautionary, yet mournful way, like she can see it will end up like her own relationship with her daughter, despite wanting the opposite. This is a really subtle story. I feel like if you blink, you’ll miss the message. But I think it’s compelling for that reason. It’s really a portrait of parenting and how to grapple with mistakes you may make that inevitably affect your children. Wow just unlocked the theme writing this lol.

The final story I wrote in January is “The Party,” which may be in my top 3 faves I’ve ever written. This story follows Aida, a recent divorcee in her ~40s. The day her divorce turns official, she moves into a new house and receives a party invitation addressed to the previous homeowner, yet RSVP’s anyway. At this party, she’s hoping to find some sense of noticeability, having struggled with being nondescript her whole life. Things seem quite normal at the party, until it gets bizarre.

I LOVE this story, y’all. Like “How to Spell Alpaca” it really delves into motherhood. Aida, our narrator, is incredibly hurt after her divorce. She now lives farther from her children she struggled to feel connected to in the first place, and doesn’t really know how to reignite her life. This party is a means to do that. This is the first story I’ve written that contains a “twist” which is strange because I really prefer stories that give us as much info as possible upfront, but yes, this one sort of twists.

February

I wrote one story in February, and that was “Protect the Young.” This title is SO changing when I think of a new one because it’s thematically incorrect, haha, but this story follows a woman in her late 40s whose daughter, Lindy, announces she is married the same day all their backyard chickens turn up dead. The discovery of dead chickens prompts our narrator to recall her ex-husband’s murder and the role her daughter may have played in his death.

I love this story so much! I think this would make a great closing for my short story collection. It just has that vibe! I wrote this for my second fiction workshop. I thought I had to hand in the story a week earlier than I had to, so I panicked and wrote this in one sitting! Little did I know, I did not need to do that lol but I’m very happy because this story is so fun. We get to learn more about Arnold (her ex), his relationship with Lindy, and how that translates to Lindy’s relationship with her new husband, Malcolm. I LOVE true crime (I listen to about 3-4 hours of case coverage daily), and this is my first “true crime” story. Because of that, I’m very sus of a few details that probably wouldn’t slide in actual investigatory work, so I’ll also be working on that in a revision. My professor also gave me a great suggestion that may alter the story’s structure a bit, though I look forward to toggling with it in the future.

March

In March, I was really on a Criminal Minds kick lol. I’ve been watching this show since I was seven (oops), and dove into a rewatch since it hit Disney+! This story, “Where to Run When the Lamb Roars,” is very clearly Rachel watching 5 episodes of CM a day. Oops! We follow 14-year-old Astrid as she and her older half brother kidnap a young girl to sacrifice for their yearly ritual.

I knew a few things going into this story, but the main thing was that I did NOT want to show any details of a potential murder (if one even occurs). I really wanted to keep all of those elements off the page because this story is not about those events, but about Astrid’s relationship with her brother. They are a murderous duo, with Astrid actually being the dominant partner. I wanted to explore that. I knew her brother, Fox, was more of a submissive partner in their team, even when he used to do this same thing with his father when he was much younger (chilling!), and so it was a task to explore how this young girl’s desire for violence works. The end actually comes right before the story starts, one could say, but I like it for this reason. It really made me contemplate the story by the time I finished it, and helped me examine what it really was about versus what it appeared to be about.

April

(TW: sexual content, non explicit)

I was so busy this month! Who knows if I’ll write a story last minute, but I did write one story this month called “Five Times Fast.” I wrote this during a “writing sprint” that was being hosted at a flash fiction workshop I recently took with one of my favourite writers ever, K-Ming Chang. I learned so much from this class, and am so happy I came out of it with a draft! This story is just over 300 words, so the shortest flash I’ve ever written, but I’m really happy with it. It was based off the prompt “describe the last time you or your character was naked.” In this case, the narrator has a “friends with benefits” relationship with Ricky who works at a laundromat. This story highlights a moment in this relationship (and also Ricky’s goofy personality lol). I really like it! Hopefully I’ll submit it to some magazines soon.

My short story collection

Very briefly I wanted to touch on my short story collection which I’ve titled “She is Also Dead.” I’ve been meaning to make a blog post on this, so look out for that in the coming months, but this collection is already at around 35k words (about 14 stories so far). The collection also surprisingly has a solid amount of flash fiction which is kind of fun! There’s definitely a range here, which is what I personally love in short story collections.

I feel very professional now that I have a ~collection chart. This is her:

(image description: A chart with the title “She is Also Dead.” It is broken into four columns: Story, Status, Word Count, and Published. Entry 1 - Story: Slaughter the Animal. Status: Revisions, Word Count, 3982, Published: N/A. Entry 2 - Story: Joanne, I’ll Pray for You, Status: Polished, Word Count: 1809, Published: N/A. Entry 3 - Story: Primary Organs, Status: Published, Word Count: 2342, Published: The Malahat Review. Entry 4 - Story: Faberge, Status, Polished, Word Count: 619, Published: N/A. Entry 5 - Story: The Wolf-Antelope Will Not Come for Us, Status, Polished, Word Count: 1556, Published: filling Station (forthcoming). Entry 6 - Story: How to Spell Alpaca, Status: revisions, Word Count: 1327, Published: N/A. Entry 7 - Story: Blink Twice for Final Judgement, Status: Polished, Word Count: 6572, Published: N/A. Entry 8 - Story: The Species is Dead, Status: Published, Word Count: 1208, Published: Minola Review. Entry 9 - Story: Shark Swimming, Status: Polished, Word Count: 907, Published: N/A. Entry 10 - Story: The Party, Status, Polished, Word Count 2339, Published: N/A. Entry 11 - Story: Fig, Status: Polished, Word Counter: 947, Published: N/A. Entry 12 - Story: Protect the Young, Status: Revisions, Word Count: 4128, Published: N/A. Entry 13 - Story: Where to Run When the Lamb Roars, Status: Revisions, Word Count: 2174, Published: N/A. Entry 14 - Story: Phantom Limbs, Status: Revisions, Word Count: 4844, Published: N/A.) /end image description.

This order is DEFINITELY not permanent (at this point whenever I write a story, I just fit it randomly into this chart lol), and some of the info is outdated (for example, Slaughter the Animal is now polished!!! thank god!!!). But just an idea of what I’m thinking of including.

This is the summary so far:

In SHE IS ALSO DEAD, characters are pushed to act on their gravest impulses. A small town turns murderous when their local invasive species, the Janices, begin dying. A child struggles to understand her mother’s suicide. A college dropout who insists she’s being haunted by a poltergeist unexpectedly breaks up with her boyfriend. A mother acknowledges her daughter’s murderous tendencies after her backyard chickens mysteriously die. A young girl caters the funeral of a girl rumored to be killed by a wolf-antelope. A newly-divorced mother RSVP’s to a bizarre party she was not invited to, and a murderous brother and sister upkeep their yearly tradition of abducting a young girl. These stories follow characters who navigate death, violent desires, womanhood, and loss, both self-imposed and otherwise.

This is also so subject to change as I may pull and add stories to the collection!

I think I’m going to leave this update here for now! I’ve written TONS of poetry too, but I honestly ~hate my poetry right now lol, so! Hope you enjoyed this chill rambly update. Hope writing has going well for you all! All the best!

--Rachel

[addie-your-queen]

Newsies As Things I Have Done Today (while being very out of it)

Race: *Arranges tabs into rainbow order*

...

Jack: *Pours cereal*

Jack: *Trips on the way to put the box away*

Jack: *Proceeds to pour milk ALL over the stove, counter, and floor*

Jack: *Laughing uncontrollably* I've officially lost it folks

...

Romeo: *Cries because gender*

...

Albert: Yes, I was in class. No I do not know anything that happened.

...

Spot: *Rubbing eyes because they hurt from looking at a screen right after waking up*

...

Sarah about AO3: I only gave it 9 things to include and 12 not to. What do you mean there's nothing that fits that??

...

Romeo: *Cries again because gender*

...

Sarah: *Get's several results of what she wanted*

Sarah: *Opens them all*

Sarah: *Reads one paragraph of each*

Sarah: Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope.

Sarah: I don't get it. That's what I wanted. But then I read them and I didn't want that anymore.

...

Race: Why Spotify? Why? The playlist is 85 songs long. 85!!!! And somehow, you have been playing the same 10 songs for the past week!!!

...

Elmer, crying: I just need a hug

Crutchie, Jack, Davey, and literally everyone: I'll hug you!

Elmer: I need a real hug. Not one from you guys.

Newsies:

Elmer: Quarantine sucks ):

[socratoteles]

A year to get Ph.D in letting go

The last time I was here, I wrote that perhaps it was time for me to go out and just enjoy the world. And amid the global pandemic, I sort of managed to do that. It was such a lifesaver in a year of goodbyes. I`ll get to that, but let me begin with my coronavirus scare.

On March 4 last year, I was away in Bandung, aware but not worried of some obscure virus that triggered a total lockdown in some Chinese cities. That very same day was also the time when my colleagues came in contact with a man who later confirmed of having contracted COVID-19.

That was how close I was of contracting the virus. Had I not taken a paid leave to write last year’s essay in the city where I was born, chances were high that I was another case as well, at that early stage of the pandemic too. I`m still familiar with the helplessness that came after I checked in to a hospital only to being denied the test (the nurse reasoned that the contact with my colleagues, who might catch the virus from the confirmed man, cannot be categorized as close contact).

And that experience, of confusion and fear of infecting loved ones, left a lasting impression that shaped my behavior going forward. After all, it takes a pandemic to make wearing mask and washing hands could made the difference between life and death.

Covid-induced isolation meant that I spent most of my time being holed up in my room for the past 12 months. To this day the side effects of this solitary existence is still beyond my full grasp. On one hand, this situation had brought out my inner resiliency, resourcefulness and adaptability in the long days and night when things were just so dark. On the other hand, it also forced me to deal with unresolved traumas and numerous intrusive thoughts, which I will get into later.

People get really creative during the long locked-down days, spending it doing viral social media challenges one after the other. Videoconferencing become a thing on its own and for some reason loads of folks played a game named Among Us too, perhaps to remind themselves of the interactions cruelly torn apart because of the virus.

There was also a newfound awareness on class too, because the coronavirus disproportionately affected different individuals with different income level. At least on my part, I was lucky that essential workers (the pandemic elevated the phrase into such a buzzword) near my place were safe and somehow never contracted the virus. It is worth mentioning that I definitely cannot survive this long if not for the minimarket workers, ride-hailing drivers and dozens of cooks, all of whom must have worked in long hours, despite knowing the risk, just to keep their families fed.

Others, however, were not so lucky. the SARS-CoV-2 had infected more than a million Indonesians a year after it was officially detected in these shores. Millions have lost their jobs as economic activities ground to a halt. The place I currently work was not an exception. Massive layoffs would have happened in my office had the shareholders have enough money to properly compensate their workers.

It was an obviously eye-opening experience to calculate my own severance pay and make sure I could survive on that for as long as possible. The prospect of losing your income during the pandemic –which should be that particular time for anyone to hold on to their what-ifs money– was really awful.

This is the paragraph where I say that I wish nothing but the best for those who left the company simply because they deserve nothing less than that.

But there was another reason why I signed up for a help from professional therapist last year. In the latter part of last year, things got very, very grim. At the risk of oversimplification, let’s just say that I was unable to express my feelings properly to a girl that I really liked, right at the most critical moment when probably both of us needed support from each other. She eventually left with another guy.

Days before that fateful event happened, I was quietly bearing my own burden. After years of convincing myself that I was okay, I was, in fact, not okay, at least mentally. Years of trauma have caught up. It’s too personal to even spell that out here but I`ll just quote this Youtuber just to describe a fitting metaphor. 

“You see, human identity is like a house of card. One that’s always expanding. A story that is ever developing and always referred back to because every memory becomes a new card. Trauma is when a card doesn’t fit because the experience itself is so painful that it’s incompatible with everything else and if you become obsessed with making it fit the whole house of cards can fall apart and you lose the confidence to build anything new.”

Basically, my house of cards came crashing down, hard. At a time, it reduced me into this insecure soul who were unsure that people will accept me for who I was.

The last time I felt this way was a couple years back when my parent’s divorce was formalized. A girlfriend turned ex-girlfriend at that time too. Apparently, the universe has a cruel sense of timing to combine existential crisis with a relationship one.

The road to recovery was rocky, to say the least. I know something fundamental must be addressed, hence the therapy session.

I`m grateful for the company of my friends, either offline or online. (yes, I had become quite loose in terms of isolation because I know I had to prioritize my mental health; COVID-19 be damned). I`m also glad to say that because I talked with my friends about this issue, some of them were also encouraged to seek professional help.

At the height of my despair, I watched La Grande Bellezza (probably for a half a dozen time already) again and found this quote, spoken by the protagonist Jep Gambardella:

“We’re all on the brink of despair. We can only look each other in the face, keep each other company, kid each other a bit. Don’t you agree?”

Someone was kind enough to upload the entire scene on Youtube.

I decided that all bets are off, so I purchased books, many of which had been on my to-read list for years because I know I`ll have to read it when I search for a catharsis. That was how I finally read the Camus’ Myth of Sisyphus, from which I managed to understand what he meant by the absurdities of life. Into the Wild, excellently written by Jon Krakauer, broke my heart too because of Chris Mccandles’ tales somehow mimicked my own, minus the grand adventure part. I finally read Alan Watts too, from whom I learned that efforts to avoid from pain is painful in itself.

And music, a constant part of my life as I know it, helps too. I was saved because Fleet Foxes released a life-affirming record that fittingly spoke about relief, gratitude, and seasonal rebirth. During the darkest days I was just alone with my guitar in my room, terribly singing out the words that these musicians carved out of their soul to release my emotional burden. I was particularly grateful for being reminded time and again that “no one gets it right” but “we’re all supposed to try”.

I made a playlist containing songs that for me served as a reminder to be gentle for myself. You can check that here.

All of that was a roundabout way to say that I indeed, was able to go out amid the pandemic. On one afternoon I just said fuck it, I need to go out and see things. That led me to a weekly socially-distanced walk around the neighborhood, which was therapeutic in itself because the walks allowed me to be fully present and be sensitive to the sights and sounds and smells around me. Nothing is more liberating that allowing your feet to go where it you to go.

I don’t have the full answers yet, but as I wrote his essay, I`m glad to be able to say that I have rebuild my house of cards, with some of the bad cards included as well. It was quite a bumpy ride but when I looked back, this particular tweet was eerily prescient because it rings true today as was the day I tweeted it.

But I walked away from the depths of that bottomless pit not only with knowledge, but also of understanding the parts that made me who I am. I`m also humbled after I saw the abyss for the second time because it suggests that there might be another time when I found myself on the edge of despair.

I`ll never forget the fact that these hard-won lessons came on the back of years of pain, grief and suffering. But it also came on the heels of moments of simple walk in the setting sun and feeling the breeze on the beach too. In fact, I have made it my mission going forward to acknowledge both good and bad things as they are. Because forcing yourself to remember all the bright things when you were in the dark, and vice versa, is a form of self-torture. I hope this essay somehow do that mission justice.

I have said goodbyes to many things in life as the crisis comes and goes, but 2020 goodbyes were simply different. So much so that I thought I have a PhD in letting go already, however absurd that idea is.

[jelenedra]

Additional notes and ephemera for Restoration. Read with caution! There are spoilers at the end of this post.

Fun fact: the fic as posted to AO3 is 84,709. The amount of fic I actually wrote is 122,284. That means there’s 37,575 words of material on the cutting room floor. Oof.

Pinyin place names:

Fumodong : Demon Slaughtering Cave

Luanzang Gang : the Burial Mounds

Bujing Shi : the Unclean Realm

Yunshen Buzhichu : Cloud Recesses

Lianhua Wu : Lotus Pier/Lotus Cove

Buyetian Cheng : Nightless City/Nevernight

Jinlin Tai : Carp Tower/Koi Tower

Pinyin titles:

Huadan Shou : Core-Melting Hand/Core Crusher

Zi Zhizhu : Violet Spider

I believe all the other pinyin terms used are commonly used in fandom or are sufficiently contextualised to be understood, but let me know if there are any that need clarification!

Spoilers ahead! Gonna list the minor/background pairings.

Some of these are fairly textual, but with the exception of occasional flirtation/references in characters’ inner monologues, almost all actual romance occurs completely off-screen. 

Meng Yao/Nie Mingjue (nieyao)

Jiang Yanli/Nie Huaisang (sangli)

(implied) Lan Xichen/Xue Yang (xiyang)

(implied) Jin Zixuan/Wen Ning (ningxuan)

Wang Lingjiao/Wen Qing (lingqing)

I did not intend for there to be Song Lan/Su She/Xiao Xingchen (songsuxiao), but I’m told some people saw it in there, so. Have at.

Here are some notes about names of people, for those who don’t get names in canon. I was ably assisted by merakily and invitan in choosing these and am told they’re not wildly inappropriate! There are some spoilers in the details given.

Starting off with the nicknames for the babies, so if you’re not sure if you want to spoil yourself further you have two paragraphs to back out or continue.  

Xiaodou (小豆, Adzuki) or Xiaodou Yeye (小豆爷爷, Grandpa Adzuki) is a nickname given to baby Mo Xuanyu. Adzuki are a type of bean, also called red mung beans, and they’re commonly boiled with sugar to make an extremely delicious paste called anko. In Chinese cuisine it’s commonly used as filling for pastry dishes like mooncakes and tangyuan. The story of how he got that nickname is in chapter 12; in short, he was red and wrinkly, as many babies are, and the nickname stuck. The more common term for adzuki seems to be hongdou (红豆) but xiaodou, chidou (赤豆), chixiaodou, hongxiaodou, etc. are used fairly interchangably as far as I can tell, and I think the version that approximates to “little bean” is the cutest version to refer to a baby with.

Luobo Zhongzi is a nickname given to baby Wen Yuan. I used the characters for the words translated as “radish seeds” in chapter 74. In that chapter, Wen Qing scolds Wei Wuxian because she told him to go buy radish seeds and instead he fought Jiang Cheng. In my head, this is how that nickname came to be:

“Wei Ying,” Meng Yao says, with the fragile calm of someone an inch away from completely losing his shit, “I thought I told you to buy radish seeds.”

“Are you blind, Meng-shidi? Look at this handsome radish seed I have right here!” Wei Ying bounces the baby on his hip. “We’ll plant him and he’ll sprout right up, you’ll see.”

Meanwhile, Xue Yang sidles up to Wen Zhuliu and gives him his biggest, toothiest smile. “Gege, teach me how to punch someone in the soul?”

Some birth and courtesy names:

Fu Xiang (富 祥); the fu here is still a relatively common character used as a Chinese surname today, and can also mean “wealthy” or “abundant” - a good name for a mercantile sect, especially one that wants to curry favour with Lanling Jin. The xiang means “auspicious” - also a fairly common name, in this case given by parents who hoped their daughter would tie them to one of the larger sects one day.

Mo Xing (莫惺). The character 惺 is commonly understood as “tranquil”, although it has an older literary meaning of “wise” or “intelligent”, as Mo Lang tells Mo Yu. However, Mo Yu is not particularly literate at the time she chooses it, and doesn’t realise that Mo Lang is rather unkindly choosing a name that’s homophonous with 猩, which means “ape”, and 腥, which means “fishy smell”.

Mo Lang (莫 角); in modern usage, lang means “jade-like stone”, “clean and white”, or “the tinkling of pendants” but it also has an archaic meaning as “white jade” i.e. the most valuable jade.

Mo Yu (莫玉); yu also means “jade”, but in this case, just regular jade, not fancy white jade.

Mo Lihua (莫 莉花). Li, “jasmine”, and hua, “flower”. The character used for her surname is the same as all other members of the Mo family, meaning “no one” or “do not”, but sometimes Mo Lihua likes to troll people by writing her name as 茉莉花, which is the full name for a jasmine flower (the literal translation would be “jasmine jasmine flower”.) Mo Lihua is a reference to the popular folk song Mo Li Hua, which definitely post-dates the CQL timeframe, but I already disclaimed my ahistoricity so we are all just going to deal with that. It’s very popular - Celine Dion and Song Zuying performed it at the Beijing Olympics - and I thought it was particularly appropriate because of a translation singeli showed me:

Oh beautiful jasmine flower / Oh beautiful jasmine flower / Sweet-smelling, beautiful, stems full of buds / Fragrant and white, everyone praises / Let me pluck you down to give to someone else / Jasmine flower, jasmine flower  

LET ME PLUCK YOU DOWN TO GIVE TO SOMEONE ELSE

ahem

Meng Jingqiu (孟经秋); the jing comes from the Shijing, the Book of Songs, which really does use the same character as Meng Shi’s birth name (诗). The qiu comes from the Chunqiu, the Spring and Autumn Annals. These are two of the Five Classics of Confucianism.

Meng Fuqiu (孟府秋); the fu comes from yuefu (乐府), which is a genre of classical poetry intended to mimic folk songs (class issues, anyone...?), and also means governance - something Meng Yao excels at. The qiu, again, comes from Chunqiu and links his courtesy name with Meng Jingqiu. I thought it was nicer than linking him to Jin Guangshitbag.

Wen Guijiao (温 圭角); this is a little complex. A gui was a long jade tablet or scepter, often shaped like a sword (here’s a plain one) (here’s one with poetry on it) (and one with animal masks) (and a very fancy one with dragons) held by imperial rulers for certain ceremonies. The pointed tip is called the guijiao (literally “corner of the jade tablet” but more usefully “tip of the scepter”, I believe). So literally the guijiao is the most delicate piece of an incredibly delicate and ornate piece of jade, but figuratively it means “talents displayed”, as in the chengyu bulu-guijiao (不露圭角) which is literally “do not reveal the tip of the scepter” and means to remain inconspicuous by hiding your talents. And I thought that was nice, for Our Lady of Hidden Badassery.

(here are some more examples of cool gui) 

Update: can’t believe I forgot the comically long list of Wen sect heirs in chapter 11!

Wen Qing = as per canon, “tenderness”

Wen Xu = as per canon, my best guess is approximately “warmth of the rising sun”

Wen Chao = as per canon, approximately “warmth of the dawn”

Wen Liang (温良) = “warm and kind”

Wen Budun (温布顿) = Wimbledon, as in the tennis event

Wen Rou (温柔) = “gentle and soft”

Wen Nuan (温暖) = “warm” (as in, temperature)

Wen Hepai (温和派) = unusual variant of the word for “dove” but more commonly “moderate faction”

Wen Shu (温 淑) = “a gentle and kind woman”

Wen Gehua (温哥华) = Vancouver, as in the Canadian city

Wen Cun (温存) = “tender affection” or “to be attentive” in the romantic sense

Wen Huo (温和) = “lukewarm”

Wen Chadian (温差电) = “thermoelectricity”

Wen Hexing (温和性) = “tenderness”/“gentle character”

[smallest-turtle]

Piety, Control, Perception for all 4 characters!

Sorry we had some TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES with getting this post out the door.

asks still open for this prompt list

PIETY : How does religion affect your character’s lifestyle? CONTROL : What is your character’s view of fate/destiny? PERCEPTION : Does your character think in the short-term/on impulse, or do they think about the long-term future?

Deidre Hunt

Piety: After becoming Hydaelyn’s chosen weapon Deidre pretty much lost her faith in the 12, and no longer does anything notable regarding the practice. However, due to being from the Twelveswood and being a White Mage, she still has regard for the Elementals. Before she joined the Scions and the reality of the situation set in her Patron was Oschon, the moon she was born under. As she grew up she got more desperate to escape home and travel, with adventuring not really her Ideal but more so the only option she could imagine. When she was 16 her father found the bag she had stashed away, and they had a fight. In the aftermath she tattooed Oschon’s symbol on each of her inner ankles, permanent prayers to broaden her horizons. 

 Control: Deidre believes in fate and destiny as constructs of Hydaelyn; as the Mothercrystal influencing the trajectory of her life and her major landing points. This is especially prominent after they go through Emet’s recreation of the Final Days, and Zenos points out they are going through it together, just as before. (They being him, Deidre, Haurchefant, Caelen, and Ryne.) The fact that the sundered versions of Cassandra and those who supported her in her search for another solution are all together again? Deidre refuses to believe it’s a coincidence.

Perception: Deidre has always had to think in the long term for the sake of others. Planning for the sake of others is how she tends to go. Even when she does make ‘selfish’ decisions, they either go into the long term or she makes sure not to leave things undone; for example planning to go to the conjurers guild before getting into any real adventuring, or waiting until Ultima was destroyed and Thancred had been saved to make her (unsuccessful) break away from the Scions. Even decisions that seem impulsive (remaining a cat in Il Mheg for a bit instead of Immediately seeking help) are actually thought out, though a few aren’t really (Hello DRK class). She thinks for the long term, and she plans for it, especially when the long term is going to go badly. 

Caelen Hunt

Piety: Like his sister he has a regard for the Elementals, but other than some sailor superstitions he’s picked up in Limsa he’s not exactly a faithfully religious person. He’s not one for prayer, but he is still culturally raised in the Eorzean faith. It’s unlikely that they had a church where they grew up, but I HC that there are a lot of folk songs depicting the Twelve and their stories that they were raised with, and that he could still play if asked.

Control: Caelen didn’t put much stock into fate or destiny until Deidre pointed out what I put into her paragraph for this question. He doesn’t really think of anything as what someone is Meant to do, you either do it or you don’t, and that’s that. They’re choices. He ran away to Limsa to become a sailor, but was turned away because he was 12, and joined the rogue’s guild for a time instead. He doesn’t think it’s fate or destiny that he decided to go back to Carvallain when he’d gotten older just because it ended up with him reconnecting with his sister, they could have easily remained oblivious to one another. He could have never been involved in any of her life after he ran away. He likes life better the way it is, but he thinks of things as one decision away from ending up totally different, and that’s not really fate.

Perception: Caelen is generally more impulsive. He is good for short term solutions, which is why he works well with Alphinaud, who thinks like Deidre. His impulsive (less planned out) decisions far outweigh his long term decisions. This is a boy who, due to a nightmare about Deidre being killed by a dragon, snuck into Ishgard to check on her. No thought to where he was going to stay after that, or what he’d do if he got caught. He also decides to part with the Krakens in Hingashi so that he can help the party come to an agreement with the Confederacy, when they need to. How? Well he’ll figure it out when it happens. His ability to long term plan is based specifically around the subject of farming, which helps the Crystarium a fair bit, but that’s kind of where it ends lol.

B’sahla Pahsh

Piety: B’sahla is a Seeker, dedicated to Azeyma. She prays at sunrise and looks to the goddess for guidance on her path, believing that Azeyma nudges her in the directions of people she can help bring justice to. She does not believe she doles out divine justice on behalf of the goddess however, mostly that she is guided to people she is capable of helping. A lot of opening level side quests in Thanalan are good examples of this sort of work.

Control: The idea of fate an destiny makes B’sahla particularly upset due to the circumstances that led to her being an adventurer and thus joining the Scions. The thought that the slow dying out of her tribe from territorial disputes with the U, Amaljan raids, and the plummeting amount of resources in the Sagolii due to Dalamud and the following Calamity, was all fate just to put her in the correct life position to become the Warrior of Light, is just too cruel for her to bear. 

Perception: B’sahla also thinks on the long term, but more emotionally than tactically. The decision that best showcases this is when she discovers her pregnancy after the attack on the waking sands. She keeps it a secret, which is a long term decision rather than a short term one, because with her health history she does not expect to remain so, and she wishes to avoid the extended grief that would come from the Scions also expecting and then loosing with her. When B’valia is not only born but also survives, she quickly plans the long term for that, by naming Haurchefant as B’valia’s Warden and second guardian, were anything to happen to her in battle. 

Philomena de Arboraux

Piety: Another Gridanian White Mage. Though Nophica and Halone are bitter rivals, Philomena and her brother would probably pay tribute to both goddesses, due to their split heritage between their Ishgardian mother and Gridanian father. Being a healer, Philomena would most likely favor Nophica, though as a member of the Warrior of Light’s regular party a prayer to the war goddess wouldn’t hurt. She also has faith in the Mothercrystal’s protection, but does not have a habit of praying to Hydaelyn until the scions start being called to the First.

Control: She doesn’t exactly believe in fate as much as she believes herself to be guided by Hydaelyn, which she does not perceive negatively. Following that guidance was her decision, not Hydaelyn’s. The Goddess may have put it into motion so that the members of the FC came to be in the correct places, or she may have chosen those with the Echo because they were in the correct places. Of course, none of them can be sure. Philomena thinks it best not to dwell on it too much. They’re all choosing to save people anyway, why make a fuss about how you got here?

Perception: Philomena isn’t a huge planner, something I’m realizing is a bit of a funny parallel between her and Caelen because they’re both OCs that I have end up in a relationship with Alphinaud (Different Universes, Philomena is B’sahla’s continuity alone). She tends to see what pieces she has at her disposal, and arrange them all as situations arise, rather than plan for situations ahead of time. Sort of like collecting materials and then making a project, rather than buying materials with a project in mind. 

I’m sorry this took four days to answer, Anon, I hope you see it.

[stupidpianist]

12 november 2018

13:22: Sitting in music library right now, trying to “brainstorm,” trying to “keep things fresh,” or something. Nearing 50,000 words on this project, and feeling like I need to do something with it in order to keep it from “going stale,” not on the level of y’all the readers, but even for, like, myself, doing this, I think. Not that I’m having a bad time doing this, or that I’m starting to get bored with it, or anything, the only reason I didn’t update the liveblog for the past three days were personal matters that kept me occupied for most of each day, so, like, it was practicality, not lack of interest that “kept me at bay.” At the same time I never like just continuing to do something the same way just because it’s what you used to do, and I’m having, like, an itching feeling about the liveblog, like, “gotta do something new with it, gotta ‘switch it up’ a bit.” It’s naturally evolved, I know, in terms of the structure and the tone and the prose since first starting, which is good, I like the natural progression of it, but I want to play with it a bit, like, push the form “to its limits,” or something. I feel silly writing that, hahahah.

Really dislike days when I “don’t update” the liveblog, even if it’s for valid reasons, still feels like I need to have some kind of “plan of action” in case that happens. Consistency seems like a prerequisite, or else liveblogging as a form loses meaning/power/effectiveness?? Crap now I’m going off on a liveblog theory tangent, theorizing, I’m theorizing, folks, like a big giant moron. Let me try to parse this out, let me try to, uh, “illustrate in text” where I think I can start bending the form:

-Have been doing timestamps to-the-minute as a way of structuring the blog, with, sometimes, “mega updates” that are more cohesive paragraphs, foregoing timestamps, when I’ve been lazy/unable to jot time down on phone note, or when unable to get to a computer to update blog for long periods

-Enjoy this notion of the timestamp, gives the whole thing a “real” feeling to it, knowing, exactly, what the person is doing, and when, but need to find a way to make it more precise??

-Maybe make a private Twitter or Mastodon account and post what I’m doing, that way Twitter/Mastodon can automatically log the timestamp and I don’t have to keep adding it into my phone’s note document, and I can, “with ease,” log things with a more exact level of detail?

-This doesn’t really change the form, or anything, of what I’m doing, though, want to incorporate something “new and exciting” so I’m not just going off of what I’ve grown comfortable with, need to keep “pushing myself”

-Okay think, George, think, what would be challenging, now that you’re used to logging each minute of being awake, what would make it harder, like, leveling up, the next stage in the game, the next boss hehe

Oh wait I think I know, think I have something for you, let me “serve you up” with this, let me “butter your bread,” guys. Boy George has got something, you remember MySpace, when you could do things like “listening to” and put music?? Okay so here’s my idea, I think it’ll be mutually fun to read and to write, I’m gonna write a paragraph or so about the music album/song/thing that I’m most listening to during each day, since this usually changes by day, and also because I’m listening to music for most of the time that I’m conscious. Actually, wait, wait, let’s calculate, let’s do some calculations:

-awake for, like, 16 hours each day? -subtract ~2 hours lectures per day -subtract ~4-5 hours piano practice per day ~subtract any time i’m with people i like, unsure what this metric is, heavily depends on day

Okay for like 9/16 of the hours that I’m conscious I’m going to be listening to music, and I have, like, a LOT to say about music, like obnoxiously so. So this is good, I can include an insertion about the day’s “soundtrack,” OH OH THAT’S GREAT okay that’s what I’m going to call it, I’m going to call this section “Soundtrack of the Day” hahaha, okay, nice, nice. Will do this section later today, needs to be “late enough in the day” where I really know what the soundtrack that fits my mood of the day is. That way the Soundtrack of the Day can give insight into how I’m doing, and it can also just be fun to write about music in itself. Also going to do that timestamp thing with a private Mastodon/Twitter account that only I can access so that it’s a lot easier to quickly input what I’m doing and have it automatically timestamped, been thinking about doing this for weeks now but never “implemented” it.

Okay, okay, there’s the Liveblog 2.0 update, we are now on phase two of liveblog, folks, here are the “patch notes”:

-fixed timestamp logging system, switching from google keep to mastodon

-added “soundtrack of the day” section, should provide further insight into each day’s liveblog, should also be fun to read from a musically critical perspective

-additional resources added towards maintaining liveblog, even minimally, on days when time constraints make longer updating practically impossible; new timestamp logging system should aid in this, as i can just mirror all the tweets/toots onto liveblog without elaboration, but at least they’ll be there

Sick it’s 13:44 now, I’m going to head up to the practice rooms and “see what I can do” for a bit. Oh crap, I almost forgot, hahaahah, here’s what I did today: -woke at 11h right before needing to run out of door for piano pedagogy class -hurriedly brushed, didn’t do hair, threw on clothes, ran out door -stopped for organic low-sugar energy drink, 100mg caffeine, en route to campus -went to class -went to tim hortons, got jelly donut, large coffee with one milk -brought tim hortons to music library

Fairly straightforward day so far, I’m still not sure, exactly, where my mood is, but I’m feeling well re: liveblog 2.0 changes. Don’t know if there are enough changes to constitute marking this as, like, a completely new version, instead of just a point release, but whatever I’m not about to fricken start labeling liveblog updates/“patches,” like, 1.2 or 1.02, just sticking with whole numbers lmao.

Also don’t have too much of a plan today, my obligations today are “scarce,” there are not many of them, no, not many at all, nope. Will practice and “see where my heart leads me,” I think, yeah. Feeling very “neutral” today, feeling like a murky, amorphous, grey sac.

[districofcolumbiaprelawland-blog]

Bill Murray’s Lawyer Shows That Lawyers Have A Good Sense Of Humor

By Trevor Haefner, The George Washington University, Class of 2020

October 6, 2020

At times it is easy to forget that lawyers are people too, who enjoy a good sense of humor. During these tumultuous times in our nation's history, it is helpful to separate from the discourse for a second and laugh at an exchange between two lawyers. It may be news to some, but American icon Bill Murray owns a golf apparel company. In an advertisement for one of the brand's golf shirts a Doobie Brothers' song, 'Listen to the Music," was used to help market the product. However, it became publicly known that Murray did not ask for permission to use the song because of a letter written by lawyer Peter Paterno on behalf of the Brothers [1]. While this may appear to be a harsh accusation, the letter proves to be quite hilarious.

Paterno is a lawyer with King, Holmes, Paterno & Soriano and felt compelled to speak his mind via this letter. In the first paragraph of the letter, that lasts only half a page, displays his playful side, "It's a fine song. I know you agree because you keep using it in ads for your Zero Hucks Given golf shirts," [2]. He then continues with a clever play on words, "However, given that you haven't paid to use it, maybe you should change the company name to 'Zero Bucks Given,'" [3]. Paterno is not particularly upset by Murray's actions which likely means that the Doobie Brothers as clients are not offended either. Given that this is not a high stakes issue for both sides it is refreshing to see lawyers take themselves less seriously. Paterno continues to say, "It seems like the only person who uses our clients' music without permission more than you do is Donald Trump," [4]. Comparing Donald Trump to Bill Murray may be offensive for some, or a compliment to others, but the joke is humorous, nonetheless. This is not the end of Paterno's teasing remarks, he might have felt that this was a great opportunity to express himself. "This is the part where I'm supposed to cite the United States Copyright Act, excoriate you for not complying with some subparagraph that I'm too lazy to look up and threaten you with eternal damnation for doing so," here he is not only poking fun at Murray but himself too [5]. In most situations, a lawyer would be vilified for not executing the proper protocol, but Paterno is in a position of power to act as he pleases. He concludes his letter with one last shot at Murray's ego, "We'd almost be OK with it if the shirts weren't so d**n ugly," [6].  Paterno's writing is absurd which is what makes it satisfying to read.

Bill Murray's lawyer for his golf company, Alexander Yoffe of Yoffe & Cooper, replied to Paterno via Twitter. There is no bad blood between the two parties as Yoffe writes, "First, I would like to compliment you on finding levity in the law at a time when the world and this country certainly could use a laugh," [7]. It is uplifting to see what could have been a chance to ridicule another lawyer for being outlandish turn into a lighthearted situation. Alexander Yoffe did not want to be outdone by his peer, which lead him to utilize Doobie Brothers' song titles in his response. "We would also like to confirm that both our firm, and the good folks at William Murray Golf, are indeed fans of the Doobie Brothers' music, which is why we appreciate your firm's choice of 'Takin' It to the Streets,' rather than to the courts, which are already overburdened 'Minute by Minute' with real problems," he eloquently states [8]. Yoffe also offered to send a shirt to Paterno, as well as members of his practice, as a good gesture. In his conclusion, he once again used a song lyric, "At least that's 'what this fool believes,'" [9]. Seeing a lawyer be imaginative with his word choice is an amusing reminder that lawyers can be creative.

While this case will most likely not be taken to court, it is valuable to explore copyright laws for music. Copyright law is contained in Title 17 of the United States Code and managed by the US Copyright Office [10]. An artist only has a limited amount of time to have a monopoly over anything he or she creates. This relates to the US Constitution in Article 1, under Section 8. This section gives the government the power "to promote the progress of science and useful arts, by securing for limited times to authors and inventors the exclusive rights to their respective writings and discoveries," [11]. Whenever a new song, or piece of work, is created it is automatically under copyright protection. Still, to protect from copyright infringement the work must be registered with the US Copyright Office. This gives the owner the ability to demand damages and attorneys' fees if his or her copyright is disregarded [12]. Therefore, if the Doobie Brothers believed that Murray's use of their song was damaging to their well-being, they do have the right to bring the issue to court. However, there is a time limit for copyrighted work before it enters the public domain. Works that were published up to 1978 have a maximum of 95 years from the year it was published. After 1978, work is under copyright until the last surviving author has passed, with an additional 70 years [13]. It seems that Murray's company would have to wait several decades to use those songs without permission, but thankfully that issue has been resolved.

________________________________________________________________

[1] Weiss, Debra Cassens. “Lawyers for Bill Murray and the Doobie Brothers trade barbs and humor over use of song.” ABAJournal, September 28, 2020. https://www.abajournal.com/news/article/lawyers-for-bill-murray-and-the-doobie-brothers-trade-barbs-and-humor-over-use-of-song.

[2] Ibid.

[3] Ibid.

[4] Ibid.

[5] Ibid.

[6] Ibid.

[7] Ibid.

[8] Ibid.

[9]. Ibid.

[10]USA Copyright Law for Musical Works. (n.d.) Retrieved October 1, 2020. https://www.pdinfo.com/copyright-law/music-copyright-law.php.

[11] Ibid.

[12] Ibid.

[13] Ibid.

Photo Credit: Harald Krichel

[avanneman]

Yo, Dan Drezner! You don’t have to apologize to Jeff Sessions! He IS a sh*t!

A couple of days ago, WashPost columnist Dan Drezner tweeted the following regarding a speech on illegal immigration by Attorney General Jeff Sessions:

“Filth. He described illegal immigrants as “filth.” Whatever your views on immigration that's f**king embarrassing for a US official to say.”

As Dan explained in this column, he was reacting to a story in the Wall Street Journal1 that included the following text:

“We mean international criminal organizations that turn cities and suburbs into warzones, that rape and kill innocent citizens,” Mr. Sessions said, according to the text of his prepared remarks. “It is here, on this sliver of land, where we first take our stand against this filth.”

According to Dan, “This seemed like a typical Sessions tactic of using absurd language to talk about the entire category of illegal immigrants, a category he really dislikes,” which was what prompted Dan’s tweet. But then he had a change of heart, for two reasons. First, according to Dan, because he read Jeff’s foam-flecked text a bit more closely. What did Jeff’s text say? That “international criminal organizations” yada yada yada, and we’re taking a stand against that “filth”. So, following Sessions’ statement literally, “filth” meant “international criminal organizations”, not illegal immigrants generally. Yeah, but Dan, you knew that going in. Sessions was, in effect, engaging in “a typical Sessions tactic of using absurd language to talk about the entire category of illegal immigrants, a category he really dislikes.”

But the decisive factor in Dan’s mea culpa is that fact that, in the event—again, according to the Journal—Sessions omitted the words “against this filth”. So, not so bad, right?

I’m sorry, but that dog won’t hunt, as we say down South. Let’s parse a little more. First, the official text of his statement, available from the Department of Justice website, is titled “Attorney General Jeff Sessions Delivers Remarks Announcing the Department of Justice’s Renewed Commitment to Criminal Immigration Enforcement.” Sessions was speaking in Nogales, Arizona, which sits almost on the U.S.-Mexico border. He begins by thanking the “the brave men and women of Customs and Border Protection … who put themselves in harm’s way each day to secure our borders and protect us.”

So we’re talking about illegal immigration. But then, two paragraphs later, it’s all about the gangs, and violent crime:

“But it is also here, along this border, that transnational gangs like MS-13 and international cartels flood our country with drugs and leave death and violence in their wake. And it is here that criminal aliens and the coyotes and the document-forgers seek to overthrow our system of lawful immigration.

“Let’s stop here for a minute. When we talk about MS-13 and the cartels, what do we mean? We mean criminal organizations that turn cities and suburbs into warzones, that rape and kill innocent citizens and who profit by smuggling poison and other human beings across our borders. Depravity and violence are their calling cards, including brutal machete attacks and beheadings.”

Excuse me, is your city or suburb a “warzone”? Lots of beheadings in your neighborhood, machete or not? Fortunately, Donald Trump is on the case: “…already we are seeing the results. From January to February of this year, illegal crossings dropped by 40 percent, which was unprecedented. Then, last month, we saw a 72 percent drop compared to the month before the President was inaugurated. That’s the lowest monthly figure for at least 17 years.”

Wait a minute. What happened to the rapes and beheadings? Why is it all about illegal crossings? Is Jeff possibly engaging in “a typical Sessions tactic of using absurd language to talk about the entire category of illegal immigrants, a category he really dislikes.” Maybe! Maybe!

Okay, but that’s not the worst. That’s far from the worst. Let’s go back to Jeff’s one sentence paragraph, that, as he spoke it sans “filth”—rather than as it still appears on the DOJ website—won Dan’s approval:

“It is here, on this sliver of land, where we first take our stand.”

First of all, Nogales is not a “sliver of land”, as though we American folks were somehow in danger of being pushed into the ocean (or, even worse, Canada) by an innumerable horde of sweaty, unshaven, machete-swinging muchachos. But second, and far more important, is the phrase “where we first take our stand.”

Has Dan never heard a song that includes the lines “I’ll take my stand, to live and die in Dixieland”? Has he perchance heard of a book called I’ll Take My Stand?

“Dixie” is a song that people sing a lot less than they used to, and for good reason. Whether it was the “national anthem” of the Confederacy or not is moot: it is the song most closely associated with the Rebellion of the Slave States. And I’ll Take My Stand is a collection of noxious essays put together back in 1930 by a collection of revolting old Southern Bourbons who called themselves the “Fugitive Poets”.

I have no idea if Sessions has read, or even heard, of the book. But I have no doubt at all that when he said “where we first take our stand” he believed he was speaking for the red-blooded white folks of America.

Three months in, and Jeff is already far on his way to making John Mitchell look like not the worst attorney general in U.S. history.

I don’t link the Journal because I hate it. (It’s also subscriber only) ↩︎