#fuck boy eddie!

[ashwhowrites]

Requesting for cliche story fuck boy eddie simping over a nerdy girl. Maybe angst in the middle?

Ugh one of my favorite dynamics to write. I hope this is what you wanted and you enjoy it! Thank you for requesting 🫶🏻

⚠️no actual smut but talks of it

She's different

Eddie spent years being made fun of and being insecure. In ways, it helped him build a tough shell and made him stronger. But it also made him void of any feelings. He turned cold-hearted and didn't let anyone get close enough to him to hurt him.

He was still a teenager, and he had his own needs. And when his hair grew out and he dressed in chains and leather, more girls were at his feet than he had ever seen. Most girls were from the hideout, groupies that lived to watch him on stage. They threw themselves at him for a chance to get backstage and be under his touch.

Being in a band was the happiest thing that happened to him and he loved the easy access of girls to choose from. School was hell, but the second he was on stage, he was what all the girls wanted. And no one would take that feeling away from him.

~~~

Eddie was half asleep as he sat in class. His hand on his palm as he felt his eyes grow heavier. He had a late night with a girl's name he didn't remember. He moaned in discomfort as he felt her marks still stinging on his back.

"Hi," a soft voice spoke in front of him. He snapped open his eyes to see a girl in front of him. She had glasses, and her hair was down. She wore a little sweater and a skinny pair of jeans.

"Can I help you?" Eddie yawned

"Um..." She said as she looked around the classroom. Everyone is moving to sit with their partners. "We are partners. Were you listening?" She asked with a little giggle.

Eddie couldn't help but smile as the sound left her lips. He had to admit, for a quiet nerd, she was adorable.

"I was not, but take a seat," he said with a smile. He used his foot to push out the chair next to him. She moved delicately as she put down her books and sat next to him. He smelled her perfume and examined her even closer. She had these big curious eyes, a soft nose, and incredibly pink lips, and her skin looked soft.

"Well..." She began to explain everything he missed. He tried to listen, but he couldn't stop watching as her lips moved to form the words. He nodded along as she continued to talk.

She turned her head to look at him, she felt her face burn as he stared at her with a small smile on his face.

She coughed and removed her eyes from his. "So! Let's start."

~~~

By the third day of working together, Eddie loved saying her name. He loved how sweet it sounded as it left his tongue.

He was shocked to find himself so lost in her. Not that being a nerd was bad, he used to be one. But he never thought of himself being attractive while being a nerd. But God, did she do it well.

He was captivated by how smart she was. Way too smart to be in his class. She was mature and he could tell by the way she spoke with a high vocabulary. She didn't make him feel dumb, which was different. She was sweet and took the time to explain anything he didn't understand.

He was smitten.

~~~

Five days into working together he wanted more. He wanted to see her outside of school, outside of her shell. He wanted to see how she looked in the outside world and how her personality might change. He wondered if she had another side of her. A side that didn't stress about grades and let loose.

"What are you doing tonight?" He asked, not realizing he cut her off as she explained another part of the project. He was too lost in his head as he thought about her.

She closed her mouth and gave her answer a thought.

"Well, it's Friday so nothing." She laughed, "Why do you ask? Are you worried we won't finish? Because we have five minutes and just one last paragraph." She explained as she pushed up her glasses.

"Nah, respectfully, I could care less about this project," he chuckled, "I want to hang out, just the two of us and not focus on the project."

She froze as she looked over at him. His eyes sparkled and the sun shined perfectly on his face.

"Why would you want that?" She nervously asked. She couldn't form a single idea why he would want to hang out with her. She wasn't anywhere near his usual crowd of friends.

"Because I want to get to know you. I was thinking about a date?" He offered. He felt a little nervous and didn't understand why. Asking out girls was something he could do in his sleep, but she had his stomach fluttering and his hands sweaty.

He felt more nervous as he waited for her answer.

"Why not," she smiled. She clicked her pen and grabbed his hand. He flinched a little as the pen tickled his hand as she wrote down her phone number.

"Call me," she smiled as she picked up her stuff. A second later the bell rang and she was gone in a flash.

Eddie bit back his smile as he looked down at his hand. Her number and a little heart written next to it. He jumped out of his seat, a bounce in his step as he walked out.

~

Eddie didn't realize he was causing much of a commotion until Wayne walked into his disaster room.

"Edward, what in the hell are you doing?" Wayne asked as he took in the sight of Eddie's room. Clothes were thrown everywhere, and shoes were missing their pairs.

"I'm trying to find a nice shirt but everything is a band!" Eddie cussed to himself.

Wayne couldn't help the smile that went across his face, "And why do you all of a sudden need a nice shirt?" He was young once, and he knew exactly why his nephew was stressed.

"Don't look at me like that," Eddie groaned as he yanked off his shirt and added it to the no pile.

"What's her name?" Wayne asked, he leaned against the door with his arms crossed.

"Y/N," Eddie sighed, "I asked her out and I have nothing to wear!"

"Looks to me like you have a lot of options," Wayne laughed, "But what if we go get a nice shirt? I'll take you."

Eddie looked at his watch, he had a good few hours before he needed to leave.

"Fine but we don't speak of it," Eddie said as he pointed at Wayne.

Eddie's leg shook in the car as they pulled up to the small strip mall.

"How come you are this nervous?" Wayne asked as he got out of the car. "We share a wall so I know you aren't shy with many girls."

Eddie blushed in embarrassment, and he mumbled an apology.

"She's different, I guess." Eddie shrugged, he walked behind Wayne as they walked into the shop.

~

Eddie stood in front of the mirror as he sprayed on cologne. He used water to pat down his hair, and he ran his hands over his new button-up.

He was nervous but he was excited.

Wayne wished him luck as he walked out the door. Eddie got in his van and headed to the address she gave over the phone. His heart raced when he talked to her for a few seconds. He was not sure what he was going to do when he was with her all night.

Before he knew it he was outside her door and knocking.

"Hi, Eddie," she smiled as she opened the door. "You look very handsome." She was surprised to see him in something else other than a band shirt and ripped jeans.

"Oh, thank you," he smiled, "you look wonderful." His eyes skimmed up and down her body. She wore a simple and casual dress. It was white with little sunflowers. It matched her personality. She wore her glasses and light makeup.

"Thank you," she smiled.

Eddie gestured for her to walk in front of him, they walked to his van and got inside. She listened to his music as he drove to the location of their date. She was nervous. She had never been on a date before and definitely not with a guy like Eddie.

"I hope you like water," Eddie said, Y/N looked out the windshield and saw that there was a little pond. He got out of the van and opened her door. She thanked him as she got out. She waited as he grabbed a basket from his backseat.

He led them down a little hill, his hand holding hers as she wobbled.

Once they made it to the flat ground, he let go of her hand. He reached into the basket and pulled out a blanket. He threw it on the ground and offered her to sit first.

She smiled as she sat down, smoothing down her dress to cover her thighs. Eddie sat next to her and took out a few snacks from the basket.

Within an hour they were talking like they knew each other for years. Eddie was learning so much about her and it made him like her even more. She had an amazing personality and she was funny. She made Eddie laugh so hard that water came out of his nose. Which made her laugh so hard she had to hold her stomach.

She didn't think she had ever been so happy to be with someone.

And for once, Eddie loved getting to know someone.

As another hour passed, Eddie's urgers got the best of him. She was telling a story and he was lost in her eyes. The way the moon shined down on her and the sound of the water, it couldn't get more romantic in his eyes.

Eddie didn't notice he was leaning in until she froze. He looked down at her lips as he closed the space between them. He softly kissed her lips, and his hands reached forward to wrap around her waist.

She was nervous but she kissed him back. Her hands shook as she moved her arms around his neck. She was new to this and she wasn't sure how to kiss him back. But as he kissed her harder, she got the hang of it.

The kiss got heated as he slipped his tongue into her mouth, she shivered and was surprised to hear a moan slip from her throat.

Eddie took the moan as a green light to move forward. His hands moved down to her thighs and began to slip under her dress.

Her lips stopped and she yanked back. Her hands stopped his hands from moving even further.

"Don't be nervous," he whispered, he went to attach his lips to hers again but she turned her head.

"I'm not, It's our first date, Eddie. I don't want to rush anything." She explained honestly.

"It's not rushing. I do this on all my first dates." Eddie shrugged like it wasn't a big deal.

Y/N felt a blow hit her chest. All of his dates? How many has he been on? How many had he brought to this exact spot?

"You're a pig," she scoffed as she shoved him off of her. She stood up.

"Woah, what's going on?" He asked as he stood up. He wasn't aware his fuck boy ways were sneaking out of him.

"Absolutely nothing anymore," she glared, "take me home." She marched to his van without a glance back.

~

The car ride was silent. She didn't speak a word, just stared out the window.

She should have known better.

"Did I do something wrong?" he asked as he pulled up to her house.

"I'll see you Monday." She spat as she got out and slammed his door.

"Y/N!" he yelled after her as he got out. He grabbed her arm and turned her around.

"What did I do?" he asked genuinely.

"I do this on all my dates," she mocked, her voice deep as she repeated his words. "I should have known it was all an act."

The realization smacked him in the face.

"Shit, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to push like that." His eyes were soft as he apologized. "None of it is an act! I really like you and I'm not used to feeling that way. I'm used to something different, you know?"

"Maybe you need to figure out everything you feel, and maybe we can talk when you are ready to face those feelings." She smiled sadly and pecked his cheek. He watched as she walked inside.

~~~

The next night Eddie was all over the place. He performed and ran straight to the bar. He wanted to drink his sorrows away. He had one shot and he blew it. He showed just how washed up he was. He slammed down his shot and called for another.

"Hard night?" A random girl asked as she sat next to him. He turned his head to take in the blonde.

"Yep," he said, slamming down his second shot.

"Let me make you feel better," she whispered into his ear.

~

Eddie sat in the back of his van with the random girl on his lap. Her lips were on his neck, but everything felt wrong.

He wasn't enjoying it, and it wasn't making him forget about her. He tried to close his eyes, but all he saw was her sweet smile as they laughed by the water.

He stopped the girl's hands as they went for his belt.

"I can't do this. I'm sorry," he said, he didn't look at her as he grabbed his shirt and slipped it on.

"Are you serious? Since when?" the girl scoffed

"Have you ever really liked someone? Not like being in love, but in that area where you can see yourself falling in love with them?" He asked, the girl sighed and slipped on her shirt.

"Yeah. Chances are if you can already see yourself falling in love, it'll happen. You stuck in that spot?" She asked

"You know my reputation around here. I fuck and move on. She's different. I asked her out and we had an amazing date, then I fucked it up." He sighed, "Not sure how to fix it."

"Admitting it to yourself is the first step,"

"And the next?" he asked

"You admit it to her."

~~~

Monday morning arrived and Eddie was ready to win her back.

Since the project was finished, she wouldn't be sitting next to him. But that was not going to stop him.

He wrote a little note this morning, asking to meet outside during lunch. He walked in and saw her already sitting at her spot. He took a deep breath and handed the note to her.

She looked up at him but didn't say a word.

Eddie walked back to his desk. All throughout class he kept looking back at her.

~

Eddie waited outside and checked his watch. Lunch started ten minutes ago and she wasn't there. He was nervous he might have messed up too much and that she didn't care to fix it. She probably realized he wasn't worth the hassle or the emotions he caused.

He crunched the flowers in his grip as he looked over his shoulder.

"Hi,"

He heard her soft voice before he saw her. He turned around and smiled as she walked closer.

He was nervous as he handed her the flowers, "these are for you."

"Thanks," she said quietly as she took the flowers from his hands.

"I'm really sorry for acting like a dick. You were right, I needed to figure out everything I felt. I went to the bar and I met someone."

Y/N ignored the pain she felt as she listened.

"My plan was to do what I always did. Sleep with someone until I forgot why I was there in the first place. But I stopped it because it felt wrong. I hated myself for being with her. I kept thinking of you." He stepped closer as he held her hand.

"I was doing the wrong thing and with the wrong person. And it made me realize, that I really like you. And I want my main focus to be just on you. I want you." He looked deep into her eyes. "I would love to have the chance to take you out again. I've never actually been on a date, that was my first real one. I know I fucked up the beautiful night we had, but I really think I can make you feel special."

"I guess there's no harm in giving it a shot." She smiled

Eddie jumped to his feet with excitement.

"Thank you!" he crushed her in a hug as she laughed.

~~~

They had been dating for a month and Eddie was true to his word. She felt more special than ever and it was all because of him.

She felt a little nervous as they walked into the hideout. He was honest about his past here and the reputation he had. But she wanted to be a supportive girlfriend and watch him perform. She had to try to forget about all the girls there and just focus on her man.

"The second I'm done, I will be coming straight to you," he smiled. He leaned in and pressed his lips against hers. She was in a territory where Eddie was never taken, and she wanted to prove herself.

She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him harder. She wasn't shy as she snuck her tongue in his mouth. Her body rocked against his as his hands landed on her ass.

He felt his head spin as she pulled away. His eyes slowly opened as he caught his breath

"What was that?" he asked, his eyes dark as he drank her in

"Good luck kiss," she said with a shrug and smirk

"I'm going to need luck hiding the front of my pants," he teased as he adjusted his tight jeans.

"I'll help you faster," she whispered in his ear. She enjoyed the way he shuddered.

He kept his eyes on her as he walked into the back.

~

She understood why so many girls adored her boyfriend. The way he performed was incredible. It was hard to look anywhere else.

She waited at a table in the back as he wrapped up. His sweaty body came walking towards her but a girl stepped in.

Y/N couldn't hear the conversation but she could tell the girl was flirting by the way she ran her hand up Eddie's arm.

Then another girl came after that one left. And then other.

Y/N felt sick as she watched countless girls walk up and flirt with him. It was a painful reminder of what Eddie's past was.

She was quick to run outside, needed fresh air and to be away from the scene she was stuck watching over and over.

Eddie was quick to push everyone aside and follow her out.

"Hey baby," he said softly, she was leaning against the wall.

"You were amazing!" she praised as she pulled him into a hug. Eddie hugged her back and thanked her. He pulled back but kept his arms around her.

"Want to tell me what happened in there?" Eddie asked

Y/N sighed and looked down at her feet

"I was just a little jealous."

"Why? You are my girlfriend, they've got nothing on you." Eddie explained

Y/N scoffed and unhooked her arms from him.

"They have all had sex with you, Eddie! They've got plenty on me. I mean, I am nothing like those girls."

"Exactly!" Eddie said as he placed his hands on her face. "I don't want you to be anything like them. I want you because you are you. Yes, I've been physical with them, but that is all. There is no connection or emotional ties. It's different with you because I really see myself falling in love with you."

"Really?" she smiled as she looked up at him.

"Of course." He said as he crashed his lips on hers. She moaned as she kissed him back, her hands in his hair.

After a few seconds, she pulled away. Smirking as he chased her lips. She had him right around her finger.

"You know..." she started, her hands slipped down his body and rested on top of his jeans. "Maybe I'll eliminate the one thing they have on me." Her smirk made Eddie shiver in excitement.

"As in sex?" Eddie choked out. His eyes lit up like Christmas as he practically bounced with anticipation.

"Van, now." She said as she turned around and walked towards his fan.

He watched her walk away with a dopey smile on his face.

"YOU COMING?" she yelled as she turned. She walked backward and kept her eyes on him. She laughed as he seemed to snap out of his daydream. He fished out his keys and dropped them on the floor.

"SHIT, I'M COMING!" he screamed as he bent down and grabbed his keys.

She giggled as he ran straight to the van.

@bmunson86 @mxcheese @ladymunson @michaelfuckinglangdon @z0mbie-blah @biittersweet @mirrorsstuff @somethingvicked @micheledawn1975 @ago-godance @magnificantmermaid @tlclick73 @hargrovesswifee @cityofidek @silky-luxe @lokiofasgard616 @loving-and-dreaming @eddiemunsonsbitch69 @thegemaqua @ashlynnkennedy @strangerthingsstories5255 @harringt8ns @pleasinghellfire @whoscamila @stusdollface93 @gretavankleep37 @bellaisswagger @arlxt

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

so how about that update, huh

[ryan-waddell11]

I just know I would’ve been staring at him during lunch any chance I got.

[plistommy]

[ikarakie]

s3 secret steddie where steve gets badly injured during starcourt, and his emergency contact is wayne munson. bc the dude loves him like a son and his actual dad never fucking picks up anyways. might as well have someone nearby, who cares, written down instead.

cue everyone discovering that steve has a secret boyfriend (fucking eddie munson, of all people!?) because he and wayne turn up at the hospital frantic after they were contacted and basically told "ur steve harringtons emergency contact. he is actively dying and there's a small crowd gathered in his hospital room that we can't fucking get rid of. what's ur eta??"

[missingexaltation]

Wayne coming home to find the boys viciously and LOUDLY arguing and immediately getting ready to a) throw that Harrington boy out on his ear and b) be a shoulder for Eddie to cry on.

As soon as he walks through the door the Harrington boy gestures at him and screeches "TELL HIM WHAT YOU TOLD ME", and Eddie just crumples in on himself in shame, refusing to look at anyone.

Wayne standing there listening to Steve rant about how 'he doesn't care about kids or marriage or any of that shit' and how he's going to throttle Eddie for trying to break up with him because he thinks he's trailer trash and therefore has nothing to offer Steve in the long run.

Wayne excusing himself to get ready for bed, chuckling to himself as he realises that 'that Harrington boy' is gonna be around for a long time, and he's actually good with that.

[hitlikehammers]

take the call

rating: t ♥️ cw: off-screen car accident (but EVERYTHING IS FINE), hurt/comfort, softness ♥️ tags: established relationship, married steddie, hurt/comfort, rockstar Eddie/teacher Steve, Steve's heart of gold is very possibly going to be Eddie's undoing one of these days, well-worn-soul-deep love

for @steddielovemonth day eighteen: Love is terrifying (@starryeyedjanai)

set in the 00s, with Steve and Eddie having two decades of loving under their belts, now ♥️

Eddie isn’t expecting a call, any call, really; he’s in the studio, like, if he gets a call someone takes a message or whatever.

And in fairness, Eddie doesn’t get the call.

He gets a message.

“Eddie?”

He rolls his eyes kinda automatically, kinda thoughtlessly at the cut of the audio track to let the mic system override from outside the booth.

“Okay, so, like, don’t freak out.”

He’s not thoughtless at all about the way he clocks the tension in Jeff’s voice even across the speaker system; it’s entirely automatic how he freezes, how he looks up and locks eyes with his friend through the glass and sucks in a sharp breath for the look on his face: pained.

Maybe, maybe scared.

Eddie’s heart drops somewhere near his knees, but beats there so fucking hard.

“This lady called, and she said she found Lainie’s card inside the case of a phone she picked up,” and okay, okay, that’s…that’s random but maybe it’s about their assistance manger, who just got her contract confirmed and got fancy new business cards for it and has been handing them out to everybody she sees, even gave Eddie extras to pass on to Steve, maybe he can share them at the school as if anyone at even a hoity-toity private 6-through-12 school would have a reason for a card from a record label but she’s excited, and Eddie’s excited for her, and Steve loves the people Eddie works with, and not just because they’re attached to Eddie and he loves the things that come with Eddie as a given—but that’s also true, and always has been, but—

“She, um,” Jeff’s voice is filtering through again, and Eddie clocks that there’s…there’s something more to it, more than his brain’s willing to grasp just yet but his body’s apparently picked up on because he thinks the slightest breeze would knock him over and shatter him into pieces, for the tightness in his body; he’s not focused enough to count the separate beats of his pulse but he can tell it’s quick enough already, still weighed down near his feet, that counting would be kinda hard, would take effort:

“She found the phone at a car crash?”

So: the more-to-it. The thing his body already knew.

Eddie…Eddie doesn’t even need to know what comes next to know he cannot fucking breathe.

“Sounded kinda like, uh, like it could have been Steve’s phone,” Jeff is trying to tell him, and part of Eddie hears it, part of him does but most of him is white noise, is pins-and-needles, is underwater and drowning and not even fucking thinking of fighting the pull because he can’t, he’s heavy at the legs and his lungs are seizing and there’s, he’s—

“Because it, umm, she found the card because the case was broken?” and just last night Eddie’d watched Steve pop off the case and slide the cards behind with a laugh and a promise to take them with him not today—because it’s one of those federal holidays that only schools notice happening, like the post office is still open—but definitely tomorrow, never knew which of the kiddos at the Rich People School might be a budding metalhead underneath their uniforms—

“And she said the case was, um, like bright—“

Green.

Electric lime neon fuckin’ green because after three times of Eddie taking Steve’s phone by accident he’d come home with that endearing eyesore, and a kiss to the bridge of Eddie’s nose and a soft hard to confuse that, babe nuzzled against him and—

“It could maybe have just been a coincide—“ Jeff’s talking but Eddie can’t fucking hear it, not really, not when he’s letting the door slam behind him and ripping off his headphones to drop to the groundnut when he’s gasping hard enough to crack a rib, not when the floor’s gone out from underneath him and his vision’s tunneled and nothing seems real, and everything feels too real, every world ending possibility shuddering through his foggy mind alongside every heartbreakingly perfect memory blossoming up unbidden just to serve as a reminder, an underscoring of what he stands to lose, what maybe he’s already fucking lost—

He meets Jeff’s eyes without the glass between them as he grabs his keys from his jacket on the couch and makes himself take the breath that’ll fuel the voice, that’ll give him words, just one word, he needs, he fucking needs—

“Where?”

_______________________

Eddie shouldn’t have driven himself, he knows that.

Like, on some other plane of existing, he’s sure he knows that.

But on this plane, he rips past his bandmates, all the extra people with them for recording, jams the close-door button before anyone can follow him into the elevator because he happens to know this one’s quicker than the stairs even on a good day, and this—

Eddie’s shaking so goddamn hard he can barely get one foot in front of the other, he really doesn’t think he can manage ten fucking flights of steps.

He burns rubber on the way out of the parking lot, and the nearest hospital to where Steve would have been—on his day off, because holiday, he’d have bene close to home, he mentioned food shopping, he thought he might make stir-fry but he wasn’t sure, they hadn’t made a vegetable haul from the Asian market downtown in a couple weeks and they need to, they need to but Steve wasn’t feeling like going on his own, because he might not say it out loud but they both know he enjoys Eddie’s excitability when new items hit the shelves and he can’t read the language they’re labelled in so he guesses frantically until the man who owns the place takes pity, only laughs a little and explains what this spice is for, or that that crazy looking thing’s a fruit, and they ultimately buy whatever it is because Eddie wants to try it now, because he got invested and—

Eddie should pull off the fucking road; his head’s a mess, he can’t see for the way his eyes are welling, streaming, the way he’s shaking with sobs that don’t exactly burst forth, just leak from his lashes as he trembles horrifically because…

Because they were maybe gonna have stir-fry, tonight. Even without the good vegetables.

They were—

Eddie thinks it’s fucking cruel, kind of unbearably so, that his brain’s dead-set on still processing the mundane little perfections of his life as if every single one of them might be dashed to pieces, might be hanging by a thread, might be entirely fucking gone, and he, he…

He can’t. He just, he fucking can’t.

Because that the thing, isn’t it: the scenarios he’s imagining aren’t hypothetical—they’re all memories, too. Steve bloodied, Steve bruised, Steve’s bones broken and flesh torn. Steve still, too still; Steve’s skin under Eddie’s hands when he can’t find a pulse because Eddie’s shaking, same as now how Eddie is fucking shaking—

Eddie knows all those things. They’re so long ago, now, so distant but his fucking cells will never forget every single moment he saw the man he loves bigger than his own goddamn life hurt like that; be risked like that. Be lost like—

And that’s the difference. That’s what is unravelling him as he speeds through the streets quicker than he should, probably breaking more laws than he could count and definitely more than he gives a shit to notice: it’s the losing.

Because the first times, even the times that came after Steve was his: they didn’t come with the loss of so much time, so much of themselves, so much glorious life that they’d built between them, the struggles and the triumphs, the hard choices and the easy things that weren’t choices at all: everything hand-in-hand, every night spent curled around each other, all of them, all of him, inside that chest since he was twenty fucking year old, and Eddie doesn’t just not know how to be outside of what he shares with Steve.

Eddie doesn’t think his own heart can survive, if if Steve’s isn’t next to him.

Eddie’s damn fucking sure no part of him would want to.

It takes him a minute to steady himself enough to get out of the car, once he finally reaches the ER. Steady his body, but more his fucking soul because the whole of him is shaking, is crying out, is wailing unfettered and breaking because he’s terrified, he is goddamn terrified of what he’s going to find when he walks in but he has to, he has to because whatever awaits him, that’s his husband, that is the love of his whole goddamn life and if the worst is going to come for him he’ll face it like he’s faced everything else: at Steve Harrington’s side.

If the worst comes for one of them, then it came for them both.

So he’s stumbling, shuddering, but resolute in his chest when he flies through the sliding doors, eyes still swimming, unfocused but he makes himself take a deep breath—it takes a few tries, and he doesn’t quite succeed, it’s still a tremorous thing and his lungs are still in revolt, but it’s something, and he’ll take something; he has to to take something—

“Eddie?”

He almost doesn’t register it, the voice from the sick-spiral of his memories, all the love on the table to be forfeit—

He almost doesn’t register that his name’s not coming from inside his head.

“Oh my god, what happened?” There’s a flurry over motion in front of him, and he blinks rapidly to try and pin it down because it looks familiar, it smells familiar, it aches familiar in his chest but:

“What is it, what’s wrong?” and fuck, it feels familiar when a hand reaches for his cheek where it’s still damp, tacky for the tears; when another hand slides itself into Eddie’s and draws him in, a hand that fits like no other hand in this world or any other, ever—

“Are you okay?”

And the hand on his cheek turns him and follows his eyes and it takes that long for him to clear his vision properly, but now he’s just blinking so much because that, that can’t be, even if it feels in every goddamn way like it really is, but it can’t…

It can’t be Steve here, whole and on his feet and looking at Eddie with so much worry, so much heart as he tilts Eddie’s chin a little this way, that way, squints to try and see…something.

Eddie’s breath tears out of him in a wet fucking gasp;

“Am I okay?”

Because Eddie’s really not the one to fucking worry about here, Steve had—

“You’re in a hospital, Eds, that’s not usually where you go when you’re okay,” Steve’s eyes widen as he he slides both hands now to Steve’s head, holding him still and assessing…something, maybe, Jesus: Eddie doesn’t know, but he does know that the touch on him now makes his…makes his heart feel safe and he’d been fucking terrified he’d never feel that again.

“Fuck, what happened, baby, did you hit your,” and fingers are dancing gentle across points on Eddie’s skull, so delicate and careful and he can’t fucking help it—

“Are you real?”

Because he needs to know, he needs to know with words because this feels…this feels right and warm and impossible but also true, so.

He needs to know. “Am I…?” Steve’s lips part and his brow furrows before his jaw clenches in that dependable way he has of squaring up to the monster at hand, no matter the kind.

“Shit,” he breathes out slow but then he nods: resolved; “shit, okay. Okay, let’s find—“

“You are real,” and it turns out Eddie didn’t actually need him to say it. He just needed to see the flash in Steve’s eyes when he was ready to take on the world for the sake of love, the way he positions himself a little different in front of Eddie as he keeps one hand at Eddie’s cheek but then slides to brace more at his neck, purposeful, like he’s splinting a wound or something, and then a hand grabs for Eddie’s own again and: oh.

Oh yes. That is Steve Harrington, living and breathing and solid and real, because no one else protects like this.

No one.

Eddie’s heart stumbles, jackrabbits around a little, almost like a reset: like it knows as the implications sink in to Eddie’s mind that it’s not destined to break anymore.

“Yeah,” Steve agrees too easily, distracted as he tugs the gentlest bit at Eddie’s hand, toward the nurse’s station; “yeah, and we should—“

“And you’re okay?”

“I’m fine,” Steve shrugs it off, but Eddie…Eddie’s vision is clearing. His pulse is settling. He can hear above the static and his limbs are getting lighter.

“You’re one-hundred-percent okay, not a scratch on you, not a single thing wrong,” he needs to make sure, like, so fucking sure.

“I am fine, Eddie,” Steve turns to look him straight on, exasperated and anxious and vibrant with it, so alive in it; “but you’re—“

Eddie’s hand moves almost without his conscious consent, definitely without a plan to grab at Steve’s arm and pinch his skin because Eddie was vaguely toying with the idea of pinches himself, and maybe with poking Steve a few extra times to make sure he didn’t disappear, but apparently his brain landed on: pinch Steve, avoid confirmation bias if your head wants to lie enough to make him real just you you, because you need him that bad.

Steve startles, and turns those beautiful brilliant bronze eyes on Eddie, stretches wide as he gapes a little at his husband.

Eddie…Eddie is here, in front of his living-breathing-gorgeously-aghast husband.

“Okay, oww,” Steve drops Eddie’s hand and pulls back, leaving Eddie’s head to its own devices as he looks a little shocked, shooting just shy of a glare Eddie’s way: full of questions.

Eddie—now that the biggest one’s solved, and solved so perfect, so gentle and sure and he doesn’t have to bury the soul of him; he doesn’t have to bury his soul—but now?

Eddie also has some fucking questions.

“Where’s your phone?” seems the most relevant to start with.

Steve blinks, frowns a little:

“It got lost in the crash—“

“Crash?” Eddie’s tone pitches up to squeak a little because: Steve’s here and whole in from of him, yes. But fuck, there was still a crash? He was—

“Not mine, my car’s still parked at fucking Jiffy Lube,” Steve adds with a huff; “I saw it happen so I stopped and—“

And Eddie knows his husband. He knows his husband better than he knows himself, and Eddie’s kinda made it a point of pride for how self-aware he’s grown to be these days, in living this life and loving Steve beyond the bounds of living at all. But he knows his Steve, and so he knows damn well what happened.

Car runs into car. Steve sees it and jumps out to help. Because Steve Harrington is a protector. Steve Harrington is a helper. Steve Harrington is the best man Eddie’s ever known.

Soon as he jumped into the fray, he wouldn’t have thought once about a fucking phone.

And Eddie, Eddie just, he needs to—

He grabs Steve’s hands and wraps them around his own waist, lets them go and then pulls Steve tight to his chest and buries his face in Steve’s shoulder as Eddie winds his way around his husband, feels him breathing, feels the tickle of his hair.

“You’re gonna kill me, Stevie,” Eddie whimpers, that going tight now all over again:

“You’ve got the biggest heart of fucking gold the world’s ever seen,” he moans into Steve’s collar; “and you’re going to fucking kill me.”

Steve doesn’t say anything, but his hands move up to rub Eddie’s back, rote and learned and he might not wholly get, yet, what Eddie’s putting together, and where Eddie’s head’s been, what his heart’s been through, but the first thing he knows, and does like clockwork, is to love of his partner, to soothe him even if he doesn’t know what for.

“Someone found your phone, and they, umm,” Eddie licks his lips, takes a suffering breath and tries to straighten but he’s not ready, not yet: he slumps right back onto Steve’s shoulder:

“They called the studio.”

“Shit,” Steve hisses, bunches his hands in Eddie’s shirt and draws him tighter to his chest: “shit, they interrupted,” and oh, fuck no, fuck regretting the interruption—

“They told me they found it at a crash site,” Eddie grits out, the hurt of it still raw, like just saying the words no matter where they landed in trust, just recalling those minutes that felt like full nightmarish lifetimes, reopens the tender wounds it’d left in hims; “they found it with the case broken,” and Steve leans back, then, eyes saucers as he meets Eddie’s gaze, breath catches harsh.

“Oh,” Steve whispers, eyes darting back and forth between Eddie’s, taking the whole of him in and then he exhales so heavy:

“Oh, babe,” he murmurs, fucking mournful before he takes his hands and links them behind the base of Eddies’ skull and draws him in to the center of his chest, envelopes him there whole: “come here.”

And Eddie falls into that chest—rising-falling-living—he falls into Steve so fucking fast

“I am totally fine, I promise you,” Steve breathes again Eddie’s ear, close and dear and real: “car’s fine—“

“I don’t fucking care about the car—“ Eddie tenses up, appalled at the implication that he gave one single goddamn thought to the car— “No, like, as proof,” Steve’s quick to correct him, to ease the hackles on him; “I wasn’t in the crash, but it was pretty bad and,” Steve shrugs a little then adds soft: “I keep my first aid certs up to date for a reason, I figure, right?”

Jesus; yes, okay. Steve’s savior complex had largely mellowed to a non-interdimensional-threat level with time but he’s meticulous about keeping every skillset he’d gone out of his way to learn from professionals before they’d gone up against the Upside Down for the last time sharp and at the ready for anything: even now.

Fuck, but this beautiful, brilliant, impossible man.

“I was helping, best I could, until the EMTs got there,” Steve tells him softly, fills in the gaps because he knows Eddie’s mind, all the pictures it paints for itself, and in times like these it’s always the worst possible pictures—he knows Eddie needs the slate wiped clean with the truths, blessedly softer, in this:

“Police wanted me to stick around for a statement but the girl who was driving the first car, she was so panicked and she didn’t want to go alone so, umm,” Steve huffs a little, shifts against Eddie gentle and solid and here: “she said she knew me, she was pretty desperate I think, so I rode here with her,” and of course he did, of course he did because he’s Steve; “now I’m just waiting to make sure she gets out of surgery okay,” he squeezes Eddie then, like a punctuation, and it feels so, so fucking good; “also still have to give the goddamn statement, but fuck knows that’s just hurry-up-and-wait,” he turns, and he kisses Eddie’s hair then and Eddie feels something snap in him, give way and the lingering tension spill from his frame as he gasp a little on a breathy exhale:

“I love you so much,” and he does, god: god, but how much he loves this man.

“I love you too, baby,” Steve mouths against his head and Eddie closes his eyes and nuzzles his a little closer as he puts it into words, because it feels like he needs to, it feels like in Steve’s arms like this, pressed up close to him to feel this undeniable life in him: it feels like the coast is clear enough to risk it, to confess:

“I was so fucking scared,” and the words only break a little, and that’s more than Eddie honestly expected.

“I am so sorry,” Steve bows his chin down to graze lips against Eddie’s hairline, delicate and intimate and shivery, trembly down Eddie’s spin for the best of reasons, now.

“Not your fault,” Eddie’s quite to counter, to make clear, because: “shit, you didn’t do anything, I just…”

Eddie makes himself pull back and meet Steve’s eyes, reaches out to frame his face, dear and desperate:

“I can’t lose you,” he moans a little, begs a little, says it with a bare line of something primal echoing in it, scraped straight from his bones: “I cannot ever lose you.”

“I know,” Steve turns and kisses one of his palms, and those two words hold the promise of five more they’ve said so many times, and held so true between them for so many year, through so fucking much:

It’s the same for me.

And to be loved the same as he loves is a fucking privilege; it’s heady and it’s wonderful and Eddie needs it, needs Steve, more than goddamn air.

“Sit with me?” Steve covers Eddie’s hands with his at his cheeks, and nods a little toward the blessedly-quiet collection of chairs by the windows; “while I wait?”

“Nowhere else I’d go,” Eddie says it like the given that it is, and pulls Steve close to kiss him full, to press his lips to Steve’s and drink his warmth, his breath, to feel it sink int past his heart and pump through his veins:

“Not ever, Stevie,” he speaks against Steve’s lips, all of him in it, every vow inside it:

“Not ever.”

tag list (comment to be added): @pearynice @hbyrde36 @slashify @finntheehumaneater @wxrmland @dreamwatch @perseus-notjackson

♥️

divider credit here

[mangoisgay]

Anyone else notice how Eddie’s place is the only one not decorated? Just food for thought

[thefatedthoughtofyou]

Steve's not obsessed with Eddie's hands.

He's not.

They're just... he happened to notice them, once, when Eddie was listening to Dustin talk through how he might want to make his first DM campaign play out.

Steve wasn't even really paying attention at first, just reading some comic he'd found lying in Eddie's room. But then, out of the corner of his eye, he'd seen it. Movement.

Eddie and Dustin were sitting at the small kitchen table, Dustin talking about puzzles and traps and monsters and Eddie was smiling, nodding encouragingly, looking more and more exicted. But it wasn't the movement of his head that drew Steve's attention.

It was his hands.

They were resting on the sides of his legs, tapping.

Steve could only see one hand really, but he could see Eddie's other arm jumping the same way, his hands moving faster and faster the more excited he got, until they were just hovering near his legs, flapping in the air beside him as he smiled widely at Dustin. He suggested a few things, to Dustin, Steve's pretty sure that's what he was saying anyway, his ears weren't great anymore if he wasn't focused, and right now, all of his focus was on Eddie's hands.

Dustin slapped his hand on the table, pointed at Eddie and then started scribbling as Eddie laughed, Steve always managed to hear Eddie's laugh, his hands flapping harder, slapping at his thighs.

Steve vaguely hears his name, cocks his head to the side, but doesn't respond, his eyes still locked on Eddie's flapping hands, and then they stop moving. Both of them freezing, the one Steve can see clamps down on Eddie's thigh, fingers pressing into his jeans.

Steve blinks. Tears his eyes away. Looks at Eddie.

He's staring at Steve, his cheeks tinted pink. Steve swallows, gives him a little smile before Dustin has his attention, chatting at him about what he and Eddie had just come up with.

Steve hears about half of it. Nodding when he thinks he should, trying his best to sound interested. It's enough for Dustin. The barely there commitment. And usually Steve is better at engaging with him, even though he has no clue what he's talking about.

But he's distracted. His eyes keep wandering to Eddie's hands. But they don't move again the whole time he's there, Eddie's knuckles turn white as Steve's eyes linger on his hand. His fingers still pressing into his thigh, they drum a quick beat here and there, but his hands don't move.

Steve sighs, drags his eyes away, and tries to keep them off Eddie. Somehow feeling like Eddie is embarrassed, or upset, that Steve had seen... whatever it was he'd seen.

~°~

It keeps happening.

Eddie's flapping hands.

Steve's eyes on them.

But he's careful now. He doesn't stare. Just steals glances when the movements draw his eye. And Eddie always has his hands under tables, or tucked close to his sides, when it happens. Like he's trying to hide it.

Steve doesn't understand why. He likes it. Every time he sees Eddie's hands moving excitedly it makes his chest flutter. Like he's so happy that Eddie's happy it just fills him with warmth.

But it happens other times too.

Not only when he's happy.

It happens when he's nervous.

Happens when he's scared.

The movements are more erratic when he's nervous or scared. His hands flap, shake, clench, and unclench at his sides.

Every time, Steve wants to reach out and touch. To take his hands, hold them in his and tell him he's okay. That whatever it is. Steve will help.

But he hides it. Behind distracting smiles, and under tables, and behind his back, sometimes. But Steve sees him, watches him, and he wants.

Wants to ask. Wants to touch. Wants to be touched.

Wants to feel Eddie's shaking, flapping, hands against him. Wants to be the reason they flap happily at his sides sometimes. Wants to feel them flap happily against his sides. Wonders if Eddie would do that against his back if he kissed him.

Or if he'd do it lying underneath Steve, clutching at his shirt before his hands just taptaptaptapped against his back as Steve pressed him into his matress.

Or maybe he'd hold Eddie's hands, up above his head. Feel his fingers tapping against his hands as Steve kissed him, nice and slow. Eddie would just tap faster, if he was happy, if he wanted that, with Steve.

Steve sighed, deeply, and glanced at Eddie's hands, his left one resting in his lap, thumb twisting at his ring. His right one, hanging down by his leg, shaking happily as he listened to Will and Dustin make plans for their new campaign, and wished he could reach out and touch him. Even just settle his hand against Eddie's, just to feel the joy shake out of his body.

~°~

The first time Steve reaches out and takes Eddie's shaking hand, is at the summer carnival.

It's hot. And crowded. And loud. And they're waiting in line for some ride the kids want to drag them on. People laughing and screaming and crowding around, jostling them and bumping their shoulders.

And Eddie had gone quiet about five minutes ago. Steve keeps glancing down, watching his hands. It takes three more minutes. But they start to shake, flapping at his sides before he grabs at his jeans, wipes his palms, lets them shake again.

Steve leans forward, tells Dustin they'll be over by the benches, and he grabs Eddie's hand, gently slides his hand into Eddie's. Eddie looks at him, blinking rapidly.

"You wanna come with me? Get outta here?" Steve asks, jerks his head to the side. Eddie nods immediately, his fingers clamping down on Steve's hand, hard. But Steve doesn't care, because Eddie's hand shakes, just once or twice, and then it stops. And his hand is warm, and strong, inside Steve's as he leads them to the benches and sits Eddie down.

He gives him a drink of his lemon shake up, snorts when Eddie makes a face at the sour taste, and then sits next to him.

Eddie takes a few deep breaths, his eyes closed. He takes his hand out of Steve's, leaving him aching for his touch. Steve just lets him go, rests his hand in his lap instead.

"Thanks." Eddie sighs, after a long moment, his eyes finally opening, they don't land on Steve. Stay locked on his lap.

"Anytime." He says, and he means it. Deep in his chest he means it, he'd do anything for Eddie. Always. Eddie smiles, finally looking at him.

"Can't believe you tried to kill me with that though." Eddie huffs, kicks Steve's shoe with his own and nods at the cup sitting between them.

Steve laughs, watches Eddie smile, his fingers twitching in his lap, his wrist twitches once, Steve's pretty sure it counts.

~°~

The second time he touches Eddie's hands, Eddie's just made them grilled cheese, his signature dish. And he's stitting in front of Steve, his chin resting in one hand, his other hand hidden under the table. He's watching as Steve chews his first bite.

"Weeeell?" He asks, impatient, as always. Steve makes a show of chewing slower, his eyes lifting to the ceiling as he hums, thinking. Eddie kicks at his shin under the table, his socked foot not hurting at all. Steve snorts, kicks back, and says,

"It's good. Really good. Best grilled cheese I ever had." He's serious, knows he sounds like he's teasing.

"Yeah? You like it? I didn't burn it? I mean I know you said you like them crispy but I thought maybe I got it too dark. Might have burnt it." Eddie rambles, and Steve just smiles, shakes his head.

"It's perfect, actually. You're a grilled cheese wizard. Or a... grilled cheese... bard. No I don't think that's a thing. Wizard applies more here, pretty sure." Steve says, waving off his own words like they're nonsense, looking toward the ceiling again to avoid Eddie's, no doubt, exasperated look.

But that's when he sees it.

His eyes are on their way to the ceiling when he sees Eddie's hand, flapping next to his thigh. Steve looks back to him, sees him beaming, and can't help himself when he reaches out and grabs Eddie's shaking hand.

But it's a mistake. He didn't know it would be. Didn't think. Had forgotten about that first day when Eddie had caught him staring and froze.

The smile drops off Eddie's face and he tugs his hand quickly away from Steve, hiding it in his lap, scooting back in his chair, away from Steve, his eyes on the table.

"Sorry. I can't- sorry." He stammers, shaking his head, his cheeks are red, his eyes darting around the table top as he curls in on himself, arms wrapped around his stomach protectively.

"What are you sorry for? You don't have to be sorry." Steve says, his voice soft, just a breath between them really. Eddie frowns, shakes his head again.

"No. It's annoying. I know it is. It just happens. I can't help it." Eddie's voice is firm, his words sound rehearsed, like he's said them a thousand times. It makes Steve's chest ache, with pain for Eddie, and with anger for whoever told him that any part of himself was annoying. Especially this part, a part of him that Steve is sure is pure joy, made visible, made tangible and expressive.

"It's not annoying." Steve says, and he sounds... mad? A little. But not at Eddie. Eddie's eyes snap up, lock on Steve's face, he doesn't blink.

"It's not." Steve reaffirms, one shake of his head. He moves his hand, slides it across the table top slowly, towards Eddie, and then turns it, palm up, waiting.

Eddie's eyes twitch from his face to his hand and back again. Steve smiles, small, and wiggles his fingers, gives Eddie a nod.

"C'mon. It's okay." He nods his head again, eyes dropping to his hand and then back to Eddie's face. Eddie swallows, sits a little straighter, unwraps his arms from his stomach. Steve sees his arms flex, knows Eddie is squeezing his thigh under the table, nervous. But then he moves, slowly brings his hand up, and places it in Steve's.

He sighs, the contact he's been waiting for finally made, Eddie's breathing is shakey as he watches Steve curl his fingers around his hand, pull it closer across the table.

"It's not annoying Eddie it's-" Steve pauses. Eddie frowns, a grimace really.

"Hey. No. I mean it. I like it." Steve says, and Eddie looks at him, his eyes moving back to their tangled hands over and over.

"You do?" He asks, and he sounds so fucking small. So unsure. So Steve does the only thing he can think of, he stands, drags Eddie to his feet as well, and then presses a kiss to Eddie's knuckles.

"I do. I really do. That's why I was staring." Steve says, breathes it against Eddie's hand, smiles when Eddie's fingers twitch against him.

"I'm sorry it made you uncomfortable. But it wasn't because I was annoyed. I promise you that. You believe me?" Steve ducks his head a little, tries to get Eddie to look at him, he's got his free hand up by his mouth, his nail worrying between his teeth. And Steve has to smile, can see Eddie thinking, trying to make sure he does, believe Steve. One moment more and Eddie nods, presses his lips together, and looks at Steve.

"I believe you." He says, teeth worrying into his lip.

"Good. So you- I mean you don't have to hide it. Around me. If you don't want. Cuz I meant what I said. I like it. A lot." Steve feels heat rush into his cheeks and closes his eyes, breathes against Eddie's knuckles for a moment before he looks back up to see Eddie smiling at him. Looking a little in awe. A little breathless.

"You like it that much?" His nose scrunches and Steve just want to fucking kiss him. He nods instead.

"Yeah. I really do. It's like you've got... I don't know... happy little bat wings. Just flapping around you when you're having a good time. I love it. I love-" Steve stops, the words caught in his throat, because that's too much. Maybe. For right now. But he feels it. Has felt it for Eddie for awhile now, the warmth of it humming beneath his skin when Eddie's near him.

Eddie's beaming at him now, tears shining in his eyes, he hides behind his hair, for just a second, before he darts forward, presses his lips to Steve's, a quick press, and then he's gone again, and the space between them is small but still too much.

"Sorry. I've never done that before." Eddie breathes. Steve watches something that could be fear, or regret, pass over Eddie's features like a shadow, and refuses to let it stay there, not even a second longer.

He drops Eddie's hand and cradles Eddie's neck, draws him closer, til their sharing breath.

"Stop apologizing. I want this. You." Steve whispers, pressing his forehead to Eddie's.

"I want you t-"

And Steve kissing him. Slow. Sweet. His hands holding Eddie close. Steve moves his tongue along Eddie's bottom lip, smiles into Eddie's mouth when he gasps, and then deepens the kiss, just so, tilting Eddie's head a little for a better angle. Eddie moans into his mouth, his hands scrambling to grab at Steve's back, clenching in his shirt and unclenching as Steve tilts his world on it's axis.

And then Steve feels it, Eddie's hands, tapping against his back, like he'd thought about since that first day, like he'd dreamed about, on several occasions. Too many to count.

Steve hums into Eddie's mouth, smiles against his lips, their teeth clicking together as Eddie smiles too, laughs into Steve's mouth, his breath filling Steve's lungs as they cling to each other.

See, Steve's not obsessed with Eddie's hands.

He just knew they'd feel perfect tapping out happy rhythms against his skin.

And for once, in his traumatic, full of bullshit life, Steve was right.

He's not obsessed with Eddie's hands.

But he does love them.

The way they move, and shake, and show all of Eddie's joys, wild, and uncontrolled.

And his to hold.

[buckevantommy]

i'm not sayin nothin, but eddie was thriving when he was hanging out with his new bud tommy on a regular basis but now buck is getting his tommy time meanwhile eddie is getting himself into a soap opera situation with hallucinations or doppleganger uncanniness cheating on his supposedly serious girlfriend with a woman who looks like his dead wife. he defs needs to go back to therapy but also he needs to maybe swear off dating for a while and just 'hang out with the boys'.

[exhuastedpigeon]

Do you ever think about how Eddie went all out for Shannon's grave? Even the cheapest benches for cemeteries are like $1500 minimum, and that's not even considering the cost a beautiful headstone like that.

He wanted to make sure Chris always had a place to sit and talk to his mom. It's something that seems so small, but it's such a big thing, especially for a single dad on a firefighter salary.

[ashwhowrites]

Request open, I'm coming in. Fuckboy Eddie who meets a girl who makes him fall in love, but he's scared and doesn't change his ways of being a fuck boy. He's soft with reader and makes her feel special, even ignoring his main hook up Chirssy or any hook up when it comes to her. But she gets sick of the same shit, like losing him at a party only to find him having sex with another girl and things like that so she becomes just as cold and distant as he is. Yes, she still sleeps with him because the sex is amazing but she no longer chases him. She doesn't smile when she sees him anymore or approaches him at parties for hook up. It's always him coming to her, and then afterwards she no longer even stays with him and it breaks him and he's so upset he can't stop thinking about it. End it however you like dear!!!!

I really loved how this came out! And I hope you guys love it as well. Fuck boy Eddie always gets me in my feels

Thank you so much for requesting <3

⚠️smut, angst, smut, and more angst

Everything or nothing

Eddie never thought he'd fall for a girl he randomly hooked up with. He's done it countless times and walked away with no feelings attached. Not a second thought as he moved to the next girl and the next.

So what was so different about her? What was it about Y/N that never left his head?

"Hey Munson, ready to get out of here?" Y/N giggled, grabbing his hand as she dragged him through the party. A smile on his face as he followed her without a second thought. Leaving behind a girl he was talking to without a second glance.

Eddie dug in his pocket for his keys and unlocked the van. His hand on her thigh as he drove to his trailer, smiling as she sang along to the radio.

The second they made it through the front door, his lips were on hers. He loved the familiar taste of her lipgloss as his hands slid under her thighs and placed her on the counter. Her hands went for his hair, yanking out the bun and letting his curls fall. Her hands yanked the curls as his head went between her thighs. She moaned and laid back on the counter, ankles locked behind his eyes as he devoured her. His hands touched everywhere he could. Yanking down the top of her dress to flick her nipples, then squeezing her breasts in his hands. Scraping down her stomach and gripping on her thighs.

Her back arched off the counter as she moaned. She shoved Eddie even further between her thighs as she shook his tongue. Her body felt warm all over as his soft kisses led up her body. He softly pushed her back down with his hand, standing up as he continued to kiss up her throat to her lips. She moaned as she tasted herself on his lips. His lips were on hers as he unbuckled his jeans, and took out his cock. He pumped himself a few times as his tongue moved with hers. He held her neck as he pushed himself inside of her.

Her eyes rolled into the back of her head as he filled her, his hot breath against her neck as he fucked into her. His sharp and hard thrusts made her whimper under him. His mouth was on her neck as she arched her back and tried to move her hips to his pace.

"So fucking beautiful in this dress, baby girl." He moaned. She felt her stomach flutter at the compliment and her cheeks burned at the nickname. One thing she always loved about having sex with Eddie was how he'd fuck her hard, but whisper sweet words. He'd bruise her cunt and neck, but his hands caressed her skin so softly. No matter what she wore or what he yanked off of her, he always said how beautiful she was in it.

~~~

"Wake up, beautiful." Y/N felt a hand shaking her shoulder as she woke up. Her eyes cracked open to see Eddie holding a cup with steam rising out of it. She slowly sat up and took him in. His wild hair, bruised neck, scratched tattooed chest, and the sweatpants that were low on his hips.

"You look ready to pounce on me before coffee is even served." Eddie teased, handing her the cup as he kissed her forehead. She sipped on the coffee slowly, a smile on her face as he made it the exact way she liked. Eddie slid back into the bed next to her as he drank his coffee.

This was one of Y/N's favorite parts of sex with Eddie. The comfortable silence as they cuddled and sipped on their coffee. The soft kisses he placed on her head, and his rant about whatever dream he had. She wondered what it would be like to be like this all the time with him. It was sex, but so much more happened before and after. It had to mean something to him, didn't it?

~~~

Eddie and Y/N walked into the party holding hands, his flannel on her shoulders. She dragged him over to the kitchen, filling up cups as she talked over the music. It was a night of flirting and dancing. Their bodies smashed against each other as they made out in the middle of the party. It was things like this that made her think they'd be so good together. He was thinking the same thing, and it scared him. When she pulled away to head to the bathroom, he left to get another drink.

He tried to drink away his fears, pushing the thought of how perfect she was out of his head.

"Where's your girlfriend?" Chrissy asked over the music, her hand sliding up and down his chest. Eddie didn't notice she was even there until she started touching him. His eyes blurry from the alcohol as he looked down at her.

"Girlfriend?"

Chrissy rolled her eyes at his question. "Y/N"

Eddie was quick to correct her that they were just friends. He couldn't handle being more, it terrified him. And it terrified him that others were seeing it too.

"You showed up together and she's wearing your clothes," Chrissy argued, her arms crossed. Eddie's eyes locked on her chest, licking his lips.

"She stayed over and was cold." Eddie shrugged. That's all it was. They fucked, slept, and just hung out the whole day. She didn't have anything but the small dress so she styled it with his flannel. It was all explainable. Nothing special going in. Not like her wearing his clothes sent butterflies flying around in his stomach. Or that waking up next to her made him the happiest he's ever been. It was nothing like that.

"Oh...so that means I can do this?"

Y/N finally made it out of the bathroom, too many couples didn't understand people need to use the bathroom for bathroom purposes. Y/N tugged the flannel around herself as all the guys stared at her with a hungry gaze. She kept her eyes out for Eddie. She passed by the kitchen but stopped when she saw his familiar hair. She did it before the party, half of it in a bun and the rest flying down his shoulders. She remembered how she sat on his lap as she fixed it, his lips kissing her face and messing her up. He tickled her sides and tackled her on the bed. She felt a lump in her throat as she took in the scene. Chrissy had her arms wrapped around his neck as his tongue was down her throat. Y/N felt the need to puke when Eddie cupped her ass. She watched as they pulled apart, Chrissy grabbing his hand. Y/N panicked as they walked closer to her, tears in her eyes Eddie didn't even notice her as they walked past and went up the stairs. She watched over her shoulder as they disappeared into the upstairs hallway.

She wiped her face and dug out her phone, sending him a text that she felt sick and was finding a ride home. She quickly raced out of the house, yanking off his flannel and tying it to his door handle. She felt like an idiot. She hated that he made her feel so special like she meant something, and yet could make her feel like she was nothing.

Eddie moaned as Chrissy attacked his already bruised neck. His hands were on her hips as she rubbed herself against him. Eddie heard his phone buzzed and pulled away, Chrissy groaned as he moved her off his lap.

"Seriously?" She snapped.

"Just one second!" Eddie barked, digging his phone out of his jeans. He quickly read the text and jumped up. He grabbed his shirt off the floor and buckled his pants.

"Where the fuck are you going?" Chrissy asked, her bare chest covered by her arms.

"Y/N feels sick, I don't want her to ask a stranger for a ride home." He explained. He threw back on his shoes and jacket and headed for the door.

"Sure she's not a girlfriend?" Chrissy asked behind him.

"I'm sure" he snapped and slammed the door. He raced down the steps as fast as he could and went out on the lawn. He didn't see her but saw something in his van. He kept a look out for her as he got closer, he realized it was his flannel. He pulled out his phone to call her, but she didn't pick up. He sighed and pulled up to her location, getting in his van and following her small mark.

He pulled up to a diner, that was just down the street, her frame in the window. Eddie got out of his van and walked in. He sat across from her as she looked up.

"What are you doing here?" She was surprised he found her, and that he even came to look for her.

"You could have waited, I would have brought you home." He explained, taking off his jacket as he handed it to her. He could see the goosebumps on her skin and the way she shivered.

"Didn't want to interrupt you." She mumbled, sipping on her shake as she cuddled into his jacket. She didn't need a visual of what she knew was going on. She didn't need to see Eddie touch Chrissy the way he touched her. But they weren't together, so she couldn't even rip him apart if she wanted to.

"I'd drop anything or anyone for you, baby girl. You know that." He said, grabbing her hand as he softly rubbed it.

She didn't understand him. The way he made it sound like he would always pick her, but yet had no problem sleeping with someone else.

They sat in silence as she was lost in her thoughts. He paid for her shake and drove her to his trailer. He kissed her softly as he stripped her clothes and gave her his shirt to sleep in. He pressed against her back as he wrapped his arms around her once they lay down. His soft breathing against her ear as he fell asleep.

The moments when he made her feel special were the reasons why she stayed.

~~~

Y/N drove herself to the next party, more prepared this time if she needed a quick escape. She wore comfy jeans and an old T-shirt, not in the mood to have her body shown off. She talked with a few friends as she looked around. She knew Eddie was coming, but she wasn't sure when.

Around an hour later, Eddie wandered in. His eyes searched for her immediately. He felt a growl in his throat when he saw a boy leaning over her against the wall. She was talking about something, her eyes huge and excited. Eddie couldn't help but watch how beautiful she looked just talking. Her simple outfit looked gorgeous on her. She easily took his breath away and turned his legs into jelly. He still couldn't figure out what was so different about her. But as he watched the guy lean closer and closer, Eddie couldn't help but march over there. Even if she wasn't his, she was still fucking his.

He pretended to trip into them, spilling the guy's drink all over Y/N. She gasped as the liquid drenched her shirt. Eddie apologized to the guy and grabbed her hand. Everything was so fast she could barely keep up. Before she knew it she was in the bathroom, placed on the counter as Eddie yanked off her shirt and bra. His mouth latching on her nipples as he sucked and yanked. She was breathless as she dropped her head against the mirror. His hands worked inside her jeans, immediately slipping two fingers inside of her.

"Jesus Eddie" she moaned, her body was on fire. She couldn't think, just melting as he fingered her and worked on her chest.

"Look at me" he demanded, his fingers fucking her harder as she tried to look down at him. She looked into his eyes as he rubbed her clit. Her mouth dropped open in a silent scream.

"You're fucking mine, got that?" He growled, his forehead pressed against hers as he said it right against her lips. She nodded as her orgasm was building. Her heart fluttered at his words. She wanted to be his so bad, just his.

"Say it, baby girl. Please, baby." He said again, rubbing her clit faster, she whimpered against his lips.

"All yours."

~

Eddie kissed her face softly as he fixed her jeans and covered her in his jacket. Her mind kept thinking of him calling her his, did he mean it? Or was he caught up in the mood?

They left the bathroom and headed back out to the party. Y/N felt her body buzzing with excitement. But she couldn't help but be dying to ask.

She spent the rest of the party under his arm, they talked to their friends and sipped on their drinks. She couldn't help but smile as he kept her close and kept looking down at her. The way he'd move her hair and kiss her softly before continuing his conversation. Why couldn't he see how good they'd be together?

She watched as Eddie dug out his phone and read a text. She couldn't read it but he announced he had to go to the bathroom, he kissed her head and wandered off.

She had a bad feeling about it. The way he left immediately after getting a text message? But who would have his number?

She went outside to sit by the pool, once again feeling like an idiot as she sat in his clothes. A body sat next to hers after a few minutes passed, she noticed it was Eddie as he threw his arm around her. He reeked of cheap perfume. She looked up and noticed the red lipstick all around his neck.

She swallowed the familiar lump in her throat and looked back at the pool water.

She was his

But he was nowhere near hers.

~~~

Y/N was slowly coming around to understand that Eddie wasn't going to change and that he wasn't going to settle on one girl. He'd never give up the fuck boy's life, and he wasn't going to for her. She had to move on from the idea of them being anything more.

It hurt to admit to herself but it had to be done.

Another party where Eddie disappeared and would come back to her to take her back to his trailer. She felt disgusted with herself for lying next to him knowing he had no problem sleeping with someone else.

It was getting late and she wanted to go home but Eddie was nowhere to be found. She knew it would be a bad idea to look for him, but a part of her wanted to see it. Maybe if she saw it with her own eyes, it would smack sense into her. She slowly opened each door, seeing if Eddie was on the other side. She breathed a sigh of relief as each door wasn't him, but that meant she was getting closer.

She reached the last door and thought about it in her head. She knew the second she saw it, her heart would be shattered. She already knew but seeing it would be something she couldn't escape from.

She slowly opened the door, her breath caught in her lungs as Eddie had a random girl bent over the bed. He was behind her, pushing her head down as he fucked her from behind. He was mean and harsh, two things he never was with her. His hands smacked the girl's skin and he yanked her hair. He didn't even look at her, just watching his cock buried in her.

Y/N quickly shut the door and raced down the steps. She saw what she needed to see.

~~~

Y/N decided to put space between them. She wasn't going to chase after him and wasn't going to be caught up in his sweet words. She couldn't keep playing into the what-ifs because it was never going to happen. It didn't matter how many times they had sex and cuddled until the next morning, he was never going to change.

It was the first party with her new plan in mind. She wore a sexy dress and took time on her makeup. She was going to have fun and not worry about him. She wasn't going to search for him and ask to go home with him. The sex was still amazing, so she wasn't going to give that up. But she wasn't going to act like there was anything more.

She spent most of her time talking with Robin, someone new she met. She liked Robin a lot and enjoyed her sarcastic chatter. She was so caught up in talking with Robin that she never noticed Eddie staring her down.

Eddie wasn't sure why it bothered him so much to see her talking with someone else. The way she was so invested and how her eyes never looked away to look for him.

He almost felt embarrassed when he walked up to her and she didn't even flash a smile. A blank look on her face as she turned to face him. Eddie felt anger in his bones when she turned back to Robin and gave him her phone number. Robin blushed and walked away, waving as she disappeared into the crowd. Eddie hated that her attention was on someone that wasn't him. But he snapped back into what he knew best.

He ignored the sting when she didn't smile or greet him. But he continued anyway.

"Ready to get out of here?" He asked, she nodded and walked right past him, his open hand ignored.

~

"So fucking beautiful, baby girl." He moaned, her back against his sheet as he fucked into her. She clawed at his back, moaning as he went deeper and deeper.

She tried not to smile at his words, reminding herself it was just sex.

"Always so good and taking me. My pretty girl." She hated that he looked into her eyes as she came. She closed them as fast as she could to ignore the love he held in them. Because he'd never admit it.

His lips pressed against hers as he came inside of her, soft praises against her skin. More compliments, more words he'd never mean. Words he only said when he was inside of her.

Once he finished cleaning her up, she got up. Eddie watched her confused as she threw back on her dress.

"Wait, you aren't staying?" She almost swore he sounded sad about it, but she brushed it off.

"Work in the morning." She shrugged, but Eddie was even more confused.

"When did you get a job? You tell me everything." He sounded betrayed as he stood up, still naked as he grabbed her hand.

"Tomorrow is my first day, I'll call you about it?"

Then she walked out

And she never called.

~~~

A week passed before he saw her again. She stood talking to that girl again, laughing. Eddie hated the way the girl's eyes glanced Y/N up and down over and over.

"Seems like she's into your girlfriend." A voice whispered into Eddie's ear. He felt himself rolling his eyes.

"She's not my girlfriend." Eddie argued.

"Right...how long have we been hooking up?" Chrissy asked, standing in front of Eddie so he'd look at her.

"I don't know." Eddie shrugged, looking over her as he watched the girl laugh and smack Y/N's arm.

"Two years, on and off. Less since high school ended and less since you met her. And you know the funny part?" Chrissy asked, snapping her fingers. Eddie looked down at her with an annoyed sigh.

"She's the only one you ever take home and stay the night with. The only girl you follow around like a lost puppy. You like her , you might even love her. And she likes you."

"She does?" Eddie hated how fast he reacted. But he never noticed how Chrissy was right. Y/N was the only girl he brought home, the only girl that lay in his bed and woke up with him. Hell, she was the only girl he allowed to face him during sex. The only girl he watched cum, the only girl he came inside of. The only girl he found himself missing.

"She does, and you're ruining it." Chrissy snapped and walked off.

Eddie wasn't sure why she wanted to help him. But she was right.

He interrupted the girl and Y/N again, taking her home and fucking her into his mattress. Chrissy words ringing in his head.

He watched as she got up again, throwing on her clothes.

"Can I ask you something?" She asked Eddie was surprised she talked to him. She barely spoke to him unless she was moaning underneath him.

"Yeah." He said, sitting up as he looked at her.

"Do you ever take any girls here?" She felt stupid for asking but she always wondered about it. She was in his bed every weekend, but what happened during the week?

"Just you." He answered honestly.

"Why?"

"You're special."

She nodded and walked out.

Eddie sighed as he groaned into his hands. He needed to figure out his feelings. He turned off his light and lay down. He grabbed her pillow and brought it to his chest. Inhaling her scent as he thought about her. He missed her. He hated that everything changed. When did she stop caring about him? When did he push her too far?

~~~

Eddie was drunk, sloppy kind of drunk. He's been at this party for three hours waiting for her to show up and she wasn't. He called her over and over, and nothing. He was shit faced by the time she finally texted back.

"On a date, talk later."

Eddie felt like his heart was yanked out of his chest and he was bleeding through his clothes. She was on a date. She was with someone else and Eddie hated it. She stopped smiling at him, she looked at him differently, and she didn't talk to him. She's doing that with someone else.

Then he felt rage. He knew the only person he had to blame was himself, but it was easier to be mad at her. Easier to lie and treat her like she was in the wrong. She ditched him. She changed on him.

He wanted to hurt her just as bad.

~

"Fuck that's it. Yes yes." The girl moaned underneath him, he couldn't even remember her name. His drunk mind pretended it was her.

Eddie tried to ignore the guilt he felt the second he brought the girl home, ignoring the sickness in his gut when she lay in the same spot Y/N did.

He shook the thoughts out of his head as he fucked himself into the girl, looking down at her. He didn't want Y/N to be special. He needed to prove she wasn't special. He closed his eyes and thought about her. Her moans and her hands. He tried to imagine the feeling of her cunt around him.

His orgasm approached faster than he expected. Her name on his tongue as he pulled out and came all the girl's stomach.

The girl scoffed under him, cleaning off her stomach as she shoved him off.

"Who the fuck is Y/N?" She spat, marching out the door and slamming it behind her.

He felt sick to his stomach. This was the one place where he could feel her and he ruined it. He snatched her pillow and screamed when her smell was gone. The cheap perfume of the other girl stained it. He threw it against the wall and screamed louder. He tried to find a spot in his sheets where he could smell just Y/N, but he couldn't. There was nothing left of her here.

He raced to find his phone, punching in her number as he threw on boxers.

"Hello?" Her tired voice cut through the speaker. Eddie was surprised she answered.

"Eddie?" She asked again, but he couldn't speak. Choked sobs coming out as he thought about her.

"I'm coming over."

~~

Eddie raced to the door as she knocked, wrapping his arms around her the second she was inside. He was on his knees and sobbing against her stomach.

"Hey hey, you're scaring me. What's going on?" She panicked. She softly ran her hands through his hair to try to calm him down.

"I'm so sorry. I'm sorry. I didn't mean it. I just missed you and I love you." He sobbed. Y/N tried to hold back her own tears as she comforted him. She went down to her knees and held his face.

"Are you drunk?" She answered her question when she smelled the alcohol on his breath. She should have known none of those words would have come out if he was sober.

"Let's get you to bed." She sighed, removing his arms from her waist.

"I can't go in there." He sobbed and wrapped himself around her tighter.

"In your room? Why?" She asked softly, wiping his tears. He choked on his own words and cried into her. She accepted he wasn't going to talk anymore.

"Room, now." She demanded, she pulled him up to his feet and led him to his room. She pushed him towards his bed as he fell on it.

"See, it wasn't so hard." She smiled, moving his hair out of his eyes as she pulled his blankets up. She sat next to him and wiped his face. Helping him calm down so his breathing would go back to normal.

"Please don't leave me." He pleaded, grabbing her hand.

"Eddie, we can talk when you are sober. I love you and you are killing me. But if you can say all those things when you are sober maybe we can wo-" she cut herself off when she noticed something on the side of his bed.

She leaned down to get a closer look. A bra that definitely wasn't hers.

Just like that, she was reminded why she gave up in the first place.

"You had a girl in here, didn't you? That's why you're sorry?" She snapped, yanking her hand out of his as she stood up.

"It was a mistake!"

"No! The mistake was thinking you meant any of the words you said. I'm special? There's nothing special about me. If there was, I would have been fucking good enough for you." She growled, she couldn't believe she was dumb enough to crawl back to him.

"YOU'RE TOO GOOD FOR ME!" He screamed, he crawled across the bed to grab her hand as she went to leave. "I fucking love you and it scared me. I lived this whole life where I slept with girls and didn't feel a thing. Then suddenly you changed everything. You never left my head. I thought if I ignored it and acted like nothing changed, I'd move on."

"Why did you bring her here? Was she special too?" She cried, hating that the tears went down her face as she looked at him. She almost felt like she won when he admitted no girl was in his bed, that maybe there was a chance he felt something for her. But now she didn't believe anything. The one tiny thing she had over all those girls was gone.

"No she wasn't," Eddie admitted, "it was a mistake."

"WHY EDDIE?" she screamed, sobs in her throat as she demanded he told her the truth.

"I wanted to hurt you. You said you were on a date and I couldn't stand the feeling of being replaced. I felt worthless and I wanted to make you feel the same." It killed him to admit it. He hated that he wanted to hurt her so badly. He hated himself even more knowing he was successful.

"You wanted me to make sure I knew I wasn't anything special?" She asked, hot tears falling off her chin and onto the carpet below.

"Yes." He choked, crying as he watched her yank herself free from him.

"Message completely fucking clear." She snapped, Eddie jumped off the bed as she raced out the door.

"PLEASE IT WAS A MISTAKE. YOU'RE EVERYTHING TO ME!" he screamed after her, she stopped at her car door, turning around as she looked at him. He stood in his front door, sobbing.

"Everything to you? Where was that when you fucked every girl at a party? When you'd ditch me and get a blowjob in the bathroom? When you'd come kiss me and reeked of another girl's perfume? You never loved me. And I sure as hell won't stand here and give you the chance to." She spat.

Eddie watched as she drove off.

He prayed everything was a bad dream. That he would wake up back in his bed next to her. That he could make her coffee and talk about his dreams.

But he woke up,

And she wasn't there.

Tags!

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[letmetellyouaboutmyfeels]

When they said the sins of the father would be visited upon the son they were talking about Chris imitating Buck via burying his intimacy trauma by dating a bunch of women at the same time.

[sunshinediaz]

detours | 2.7k, teen

“Maybe next time we actually talk like two adults instead of waiting till one of us gets a sprained ankle.”  Buck laughs, full and hearty and loud, and something inside Eddie’s chest lets go. Buck’s a sight when he’s enjoying himself, all big and beefy and brawny but so gentle, so soft and tender, and Eddie missed Buck’s lack of inhibition and genuineness. He missed it so much he didn’t realize it was hurting until it stopped.  “Deal,” Buck agrees, scrubbing his hand down his face. He’s less red now—more pink, maybe, like those peonies Eddie planted in the backyard. Pretty. “How’s your ankle?”  Eddie blinks a few times to get Buck’s pink face out of his mind. “It’s fine,” he lies. His painkillers wore off a few minutes ago and he’s had worse, yeah, but that doesn’t mean it’s not aching. “I mean, it hurts, but it’s fine. It was partially my fault, anyway.”  “How?”  “I wore sneakers with a tall sole hoping I could get some inches on Tommy and the other guys,” he explains, shaking his head. He knows better—there’s a reason he never wears shoes when he’s doing legs at the gym. “I’m having a hard time accepting I’m five-eleven and a half.”  (Fuck what his doctor says, the half inch is important.)  Buck makes a goofy face. “I mean, it could be worse,” he says, holding both hands up in surrender. “You could be as short as Chim.”  Eddie reaches around on the couch for a balled up napkin and throws it right at Buck’s face. “You’re horrible!” he says, but he’s vindicated in being validated. He ought to now Buck isn’t ever going to leave him to flounder.  “Yeah, yeah. I know.” He picks up the napkin and tosses it back toward Eddie. “I brought your other shoe, by the way. It’s on the table.”  Eddie stretches high like a prairie dog and sees his missing shoe is, in fact, on his dining room table. He snorts and shakes his head. “Just call me Cinderella.”  Buck grins. “Does that make me your prince charming?”  Eddie grins, too, because how can he not? Buck’s here and it’s okay. They’re okay. “Something like that,” he says because he doesn’t think he’d mind Buck being his prince charming. He’s pretty good at being a damsel, at least. 

read the rest on ao3

[watchyourbuck]

Buck and Eddie as soon as they start having girlfriend trouble: lmao should I ask her to move in? <3

[qprstobin]

I'm gonna be frank, Eddie just does not give me the impression that he was bullied all that much in high school to me. Especially as he got older, like he was the school drug dealer, he was not getting beat up by the same jocks who were going to be buying from him later that week. It just doesn't make sense to me!

I'm not saying he was never bullied at all (personally I think he was probably bullied by the people in his grade in like middle school, but leant more into the satanic image by the time he got to high school (which is when the satanic panic wouldve been starting) and people became more afraid to mess with him or it stopped when BS started dealing) or that people can't headcanon and project onto pm. It's fandom, do what you want lol. I've just gotten to the point where fics lose me whenever they claim Tommy/Steve/Jason was going around beating the shit out of him or shoving him in the halls every week or the like. Eddie just does not give the impression that he is scared of the jocks normally. He looks down on them and thinks he's better than them! He taunts them openly in front of everyone and pontificates on table tops.

I think if you take it in that context too, it makes the town turning on him more sinister? Like obviously, satanic panic was only growing at that point, and it was within the last year or two they started pointing at metal and D&D as recruiting centers for satanic cults. (Eddie also like an asshole is walking around with a satanic symbol on his jacket - peak edgy teen in the middle of a moral outcry.) But while people might've been afraid of him, and most definitely talked about him behind his back, that's worlds away from mob violence. The change was startling, even if Eddie might be able to see it on the horizon.

Idk to me that's more of what the hunt the freak line was about. The knowledge that they could turn on you and would if you gave them a reason (or if you want to go with the Eddie is closeted interpretation - if he got outed). I think he probably has been called the freak for a while but honestly I think he's proud of it at this point.

Obviously all of this is up to interpretation, I guess I've just gotten to the point where a lot of the popular fanon interpretation doesn't feel like Eddie to me anymore