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pointyearedelvishprincling · 2 years

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to be merry and bi (6k)

summary: Deciding to rent a lake house for Christmas with everyone they love seemed like a great idea at the time. Dean and Cas are building a life together, finally finding the tools to do it right this time. Dean still has his hard days, but seeing an ex-hunter therapist for the past few months is helping him accept that he deserves his happy ending.

Read on ao3

It’s Christmas Eve. Supposed to be one of the most wonderful blah blah pie and partying family days of the year. Time to appreciate crap and send all the shit to the back of your mind for one day and be merry and gay, damn it.

And he could - be merry. Put up a show. The gay part sure as shit wasn’t going nowhere.

He’s got everyone here. Everything he’s ever wanted.

So why was his heart racing so damn fast and his voice trapped in his chest; his thoughts moving faster than Sammy at last call at the salad bar?

Why was he sitting here, exhausted and alone, like a miserable bastard, watching as the people he loved enjoyed themselves? Made plans. Moved on from the horrors, if only for a day.

The warm lights of the Christmas tree reflected in the amber liquid in his glass. The rim was dusted in sugar and pressed with some kind of edible Christmas pudding picture, curtesy of Claire. He’d lost track of the time he’d been nursing the drink. The ice was long since melted, but his knuckles, still weeping a little blood from a cut that kept reopening, were otherwise stark white from his grip. Dean thought again about joining them all. Painting on a bullshit smile and baking up his famous Christmas pie for dessert. But he couldn’t.

He wanted to, so badly. But he couldn’t.

He wasn’t deep enough in his shit to think he wasn’t wanted there. They’d all reached out more times than he deserved. But he was so damn tired. So trapped in a vicious state where everything inside him is so loud - too loud to make sense of. Right now, he couldn’t speak if he tried.

It was a hell of a thing, he’d come to learn: not wanting to die, but having no damn idea how to start living.

“It’s a process,” Seb’s voice rang in Dean’s head. “There’s freedom to starting over. Only you know the life you’ve led and the things you’ve faced. Whether you’ve accepted it yet or not, you’ve survived it.”

Dean swirled the whiskey around in his glass, watching Sam hoist Eileen onto his shoulders to fix mistletoe to the wooden beam spanning the ceiling. It was like watching television; everything felt far off and false. Like they were all still trapped in Chuck’s favourite snow globe, just waiting for him to shake it up and let fresh chaos rain down upon them again.

They were free. Cas, Sam, everyone he loved, they were okay. Dean had survived, the shrink was right about that. Accepting it… that was the hard part. Seemed like a bullshit answer when Seb repeatedly reminded him that it would take time. The fact that Dean had sought out help at all – even Dean had to admit he was pretty proud of that. But Seb wasn’t there to “shrink Dean’s head” or make a lifetime of crap disappear with a couple of hundred bucks and a few round trips into town. He was just… there. And somehow, the son of a bitch got it.

It helped that the dude knew the life. Seb was an ex-hunter; born and raised in it, like he and Sam were. The first few sessions, Seb had done most of the talking, mostly because Dean flat out refused to go first. He wasn’t about to go spilling his guts just because this dude had spilled his fair share in the past. Seb didn’t go into detail; he was always careful to say just enough to let Dean know he understood the kind of horrors he’d faced, but never pushed too far. Never played the game of Who Had It Worse. It wasn’t about that.

Seb was one of a handful of ex-hunters who’d took to school after leaving the life. Couldn’t quite shake that instinct to help people, if only in different ways. Dean had to hand it to the guy, it was a damn good call. The dude wouldn’t – couldn’t – tell him how many other hunters he had pencilled in his dorky little diary, but it was enough to know there were others out there. Like Dean.

It was enough to know when he felt like a lost cause that he wasn’t the only one.

He was alive. He was building a life. He just had to learn the right tools to be a part of it.

Dean glanced toward the kitchen, catching Cas laser focused on fixing the reindeer headband on Jack’s head. The kid was grinning up at Cas, an oversized Christmas jumper drowning his body. Nothing but pure joy on his face. Dean made the mental note to sew it up for him; shorten the sleeves, take in the arms. Maybe pry off a couple’a those bells while he’s at it.

When Cas was done, he gave Jack a thumbs up. The whole rented cabin was decked out in enough lights that Dean was sure the damn thing could be seen from space. It was funny how it all felt black and white compared to that smile on Cas’ face.

That’s what a dad should be, Dean thought. His Cas – he was never meant to be a father, but he took to the job like he was born to it. He loved that kid, and Jack loved him too. Shit, part of Dean knew Jack loved Dean too.

His chest swelled, and Dean wanted to smile so badly right then. But there it was: that emptiness. That damn void that choked off his lungs and took all his energy to just sit there and fight off the darkness or numb feeling within, whichever got to him first. His lungs gave a painful squeeze, his breathing shallow. The palm of his hand was sweating, marking the glass with condensation. Everything felt too loud, too much, too sudden. And at the same time, he felt like he wasn’t enough. That none of it was enough. That it couldn’t be real because he didn’t deserve it to be and he'd been ruining it all by pushing them away when all he really wants to do is–

Dean stood. He left the undrunk glass atop his chair and walked on silent feet from the lake house. It was easy to slip by unnoticed; the looping Christmas playlist and holiday cheer still going strong.

It was early in the evening; the pale sun lost behind snow filled clouds, already threatening to retire for the day. It was cold enough that the windows were ringed with frost and the door handle like ice to the touch. In the two hours since Jody and co arrived, another couple of inches of snow had fallen. The only footprints belonging to a solitary bird; it’s red and brown feathers puffed out in an almost perfect circle. The rainbow-coloured lights running along the exterior of the building sparkled over the snow.

The cold air stung at his lungs, but at least now he was breathing again. With every step, the muffled Christmas songs faded away with the knot in his chest. By the time he reached the frozen lake, Dean’s boots were starting to fill with snow. The lone wooden bench he’d stupidly been hoping to use for fishing on this trip was at least four inches deep in snow, too. Sighing, he used his forearm to wipe away a spot over the backrest of the bench and sat, resting his feet on the bench seat.

He gazed out at the snow-capped mountains encompassing the lake, their broken reflections cast upon the ice. Here, the world was cold and quiet in a way other than what Dean was experiencing inside. It was peaceful, instead of suffocating. Calming, instead of lonely.

The melted snow in his boots forced Dean to focus his body. To remind him to try those stupid jedi mind tricks Seb had trained him in. He let his attention flow to his feet, feeling the cold, the weight, the minor aches and pains. He breathed. He felt that weight creep up his calves, reaching his knees. He inhaled, long and slow. When he felt his legs relax with the reminder that he was the one in control of them, he focused on his arms. On their strength, on the small cuts and bruises along his knuckles. He relaxed his palms on his thighs, feeling his shoulders droop as he exhaled.

He kept it up until he felt in control again, until his lungs belonged to himself and not his fear. When he was ready, when his heart was calm and his voice rose about the surface once more, Dean leaned forward, bracing his forearms on his knees, to take in the beauty of this place for the first time since they’d arrived.

It was hard to imagine ice becoming warm, trickling water; snow giving way to green grass and soft earth for flowers. But this was different to the quiet at the end of the world. This was real, temporary as it was.

It was life.

And Dean Winchester was alive.

A familiar rustle sounded to his left, and Dean felt the heat of his angel’s wings ward off the cold before Cas came into view.

“Hello, Dean.”

“Hey, sweetheart,” Dean smiled softly, pulling Cas’ hand from his shoulder to press a kiss to his warm palm.

Cas frowned, his head tilted to the side as he studied Dean through weary eyes. “You’re cold.”

Dean shrugged. He dusted off a pile of snow to his right and scooched over to give Cas the mostly dry patch he’d made with this ass. He knew what Cas wasn’t saying – what he wouldn’t say. They’d talked it out plenty, how to handle his bad days. It was hard to fight off the guilt of having one of those days on what’s meant to be a good one.

But Cas had ‘em, too. Nothing this good, this important, came without work.

Dean slipped his fingers through Cas’ own once the angel was at his side. “Missed you,” he mumbled softly, his eyes fixed on a branch trapped in the icy lake. He didn’t need to look to know Cas was smiling. The angel’s thumb trailed along the back of Dean’s own, and Dean settled into awareness of that touch; how it made him feel. Safe. Loved. Home.

“I missed you, too,” Cas said. His voice was gruff, but faintly amused. Something in his tone warmed the chill of Dean’s heart. It meant a lot to realise, even in quiet ways, that whatever dark shit was going on inside Dean wasn’t destroying this thing with Cas just by being near him. That Dean having a bad day, didn’t have to mean he was making everyone else’s worse. He’d spent enough time believing that his very touch, his presence, corrupted.

He thought about all the work he’d put in, for himself, for his family, for Cas. How hard he’d been fighting that familiar instinct to burn it all down; to make everyone see the world for the ugly thing it is. To make some smart ass remark that was really only meant for himself.

He didn’t have to hate the world for all the horrible things it had done to him. He didn’t have to hate himself for all the false choices he’d been given, and worst paths he’d taken. The angel at his side, he’d given Dean the tools to save the world. It was up to Dean now to build something beautiful from it.

So, Dean breathed. He watched the sun dip lower beyond the mountains, and acknowledged the cloud of breath that plumed from his nose with each breath. He rested his head on his angel’s shoulder, and slowly felt the world become a vast and infinite thing once again.

Snowflakes began to fall in earnest, like the white clouds above rained down upon them as the sun dropped beyond the mountains. The flakes were huge, weighing down his lashes and clinging to his cold-flushed skin. He realised then how warm the rest of him had grown, and shot a glance at the invisible wing wrapped around his torso.

“Put ‘em away, hot wings,” Dean joked, “A little snow don’t hurt.”

A single brow rose on Cas’ forehead.

Since the dude came back with his full mojo intact, he’d taken every chance he got to stretch his feathers and show off his superpowers again. Not that Dean was complaining. Didn’t matter a damn to Dean if Cas came back halo or no, so long as he came back to Dean. So long as he stayed.

“You complained since Charlie suggested the trip about the affect of snow on the Impala,” Cas deadpanned.

Damn straight. “And I agreed to leave her at home, didn’t I?”

Cas rolled his eyes and shoulders in one dramatic movement that made Dean want to push him off the bench and jump his bones right after. But the angel’s eyes softened as he said, “We should go back.”

Not yet. Though Dean felt much better now, his thoughts clearer than they’d been in days, he wasn’t ready to go back just yet. It was a damn fine thing having everyone they loved under one roof for the holidays, but nothing cut it like getting time alone with Cas.

“Nah, they don’t need me grinching up the joint,” Dean teased. He should have realised Cas would miss the mark and assume that meant “I’m feeling sorry for myself” and not “I need a little more time to make a move on my hot angel.” Which was stupid really. It’d been over a year since they’d finally, finally confronted this thing between them. This was the second Christmas Dean had woken up with his face buried in the angel’s neck, Cas’ lips pressing kisses to his forehead. Whispering those same words that’d once got him torn away from Dean for the worst weeks of his damn life. And still, no amount of time would make Dean believe that he’d gotten this lucky.

He was holding his best friend’s hand. He could lean in right now and kiss him, and tell him for the thousandth time how loved Cas is. It would never get old.

“You’re staring,” Cas pointed out, without a trace of bemusement on his face. “What are you thinking?”

Dean broke into a grin. “You ever made a snow angel, angel?”

A small “v” knit between Cas’ brows, and god, it was beautiful. “I don’t understand.”

Without hesitating, Dean leaned in and kissed the concern on Cas’ brow away. Hand reluctantly pulling out of the angel’s grasp, Dean swung his legs over the bench and gestured to the snowy ground behind them. He was going to regret this in a minute if it didn’t end with him being crushed into a pile of snow beneath the full weight of his angel.

His knees cracked in protest as Dean carefully plopped himself down onto his back in the snow. Cas stood, his eyes raking unabashedly over the exposed sliver of skin at Dean’s navel as his shirt rode up. Dean winked, and at the flush of Cas’ cheeks, he felt some much needed warmth pool in his chest.

“This is how it’s done,” Dean said, waving his arms through the snow to create a wing effect. Cas watched, his expression a mixture of confused and unimpressed but reached out to help Dean back to his feet without comment.

Dean shook off the snow, all too aware of the wet patches running all along his back. Certain there’d be puddles in his boots by now if the melted snow hadn’t already turned to frost between his toes.

“Not bad, huh?” he nodded to the flailing Dean-shaped print on the ground.

Cas had that look about him, one of Dean’s absolute favourites. The guy could scowl professionally, but that sparkle in his eye gave him away. He loved that sparkle. It was practically foreplay.

In a flippant gesture, Cas pointed to the snow print. “That’s supposed to be an angel?”

Dean scoffed. “Can’t all be as handsome as you, partner.” Oh, his plan was working nicely, he thought as Cas rolled his eyes. “Think you can do better?”

A muscle in Cas’ jaw twitched with the effort to keep up that stoic, holier than thou angel crap. Cas had plenty of ways of smiling without actually doing it. And Dean loved every one of ‘em.

“This is silly,” Cas grumbled, but dropped to a crouch on a fresh patch of snow regardless. He lay motionless, staring up at Dean expectantly with his waning patience clear on his face.

Dean bit his lip to keep from laughing. “Lookin’ good, sunshine.”

“Dean.”

“You gotta move your arms, buddy,” Dean flapped his arms at his sides in demonstration. An idea hit him then, and Dean motioned for Cas to wait. He pulled out his phone, turning his back to his wrathful snow angel and lifted his phone high to fit them both in frame. Dean smiled wide at the camera and snapped a picture. Opening his camera roll, he immediately zoomed in on the background, finding Cas glaring at his back, one brow raised on his forehead.

“That’s one for the family album,” Dean smirked, turning back to Cas.

“This isn’t funny, Dean.”

“Aw come on, it’s hilarious,” Dean insisted. “Now show me those wings.”

A smug little smile spread across Cas’ face. A moment later, the soft crunch of snow sounded and two massive wing prints pressed into the snow.

“Holy shit,” Dean breathed. He’d seen Cas’ wings before; towering shadows in flashes of lightning or scorched into the earth. He didn’t want to think about the latter, not ever. This was different. Even in the fast fading light of day, the perfect imprints of feathers seemed to glisten.

Cas got to his feet but Dean’s attention never strayed from the snowy wings.

“I don’t mean to brag, but I believe I win this game of yours,” Cas murmured against Dean’s neck. A pleasant shiver ran down Dean’s spine as Cas snaked his arm across his back, his fingers closing over Dean’s own.

Something swelled in Dean’s chest; not pride exactly, but something other. Something close. Awe and admiration didn’t cut it either. He knew Cas was awesome; that, physically, he was far more than a sexy guy with a hurricane of power all tucked up inside. Dean looked between the two angelic prints next to each other in the snow… one magnificent, one laughably pathetic. There was a time when this would have scared the shit out of him; sent him into a months-long spiral, convinced that the void between the angel and him was too vast. That it was impossible Cas could ever feel anything close to how Dean felt about him.

He knew better now.

Dean pulled up the camera app on his phone once more, snapping a photo of the print. It was humbling, for sure.

Was it weird to call wings beautiful? Seemed like a stupid question to ask, so instead Dean squeezed Cas’ hand in his own. He forgotten all about how cold he was until he felt the heat of Cas’ palms. Angel mojo or not, there was no hiding the pink tip of Cas’ nose.

Dean shifted a little to get a better look at the man he loved. The tips of Cas’ ears were bright pink. His dark hair dusted with snow, and his eyes so bright and brimming with fondness that Dean felt his own cheeks heat.

Cas’ hand moved to Dean’s chin, his thumb slowly brushing along his jawline to tip Dean’s head up. All these years of standing too close, heart racing so hard it felt like it would burst through his ribcage like a cartoon, his lips parting unconsciously for a chance to taste the angel on his tongue. There was nothing to stop them now. No more cosmic cockblocking.

“Cas?” Dean whispered, knowing in his heart that the name would always be a prayer on his lips.

His angel stepped closer, dropping Dean’s hand to brush a melting snowflake from his brow.

The way Cas looked at him, like an angel who’d found all the answers to his prayers in one man. There was a time this intensity scared the hell out of Dean, too. Looking back, he realised there’d been a lot of things he’d been afraid of.

He used to think fear was something he could kill. Losing Cas last year – that shifted something inside Dean, permanently. Set a lot of things straight and brought a lot of dark shit to the light. Dean had never been a child, but that didn’t mean there wasn’t an angry little kid inside him, facing all the cruelty of the world with nervous hands and a heart so big it threatened to break all by itself. He’d learned that it wasn’t violence he feared, but gentleness. It was being known, really known, that scared him shitless. No one knew Dean like Cas did. No one so kind and selfless and hopelessly adorable had ever seen all of Dean and loved him because of it. Forgave him for all of it.

Every day for three hundred and seventy odd days, Dean has faced the challenge of looking in those angel blue eyes, seen himself reflected within, and dared not to pull away. He’s allowed himself to touch and be touched in every way he never dared dream of. Trusted his angel with every last inch of his body and felt only pleasure. No fear. No shame.

Dean leaned into the gentle fingertips that caressed his face and pressed the tip of his freezing nose against Cas’ own. “Thank you,” he whispered in the barest space between them. The words dispelled the last of the lingering darkness inside him. His arms curled around Cas’ waist, pulling his body close. Right now, he couldn’t get close enough.

Cas’ head tilted the slightest bit, his eyes never leaving Dean’s own. “What for?”

For all of it, Dean thought. For saving him in more ways than he could count. For loving Dean and letting Dean love him in return. For coming back to him. For every nightmare he’d soothed away with soft kisses and whispered promises, every sleepless night he’d curled himself around Dean’s body, watching over him, and every bleary morning that seemed too good to be true. For being the friend he is, the father he is. For every healing touch and sarcastic comment, every exasperated eye roll and every stupid fight. For everything he’d ever done, everything he’d ever been, and every stray path that led them down this road. For being the one thing Dean had always wanted. But more than anything…

“For staying.”

Dean shut his eyes automatically at the admission, feeling his feet sink into the earth and the weight from his shoulders fall away like drifting snow at the relief.

The answering kiss Cas pressed to his lips was so gentle, such a delicate, questioning thing. Closer to the idea or a dream of a kiss.

The love of his whole damn life smiled so wide it almost broke Dean’s heart all over again.

“Of course.”

Nine thousand, four hundred and seventy-one hours since Dean Winchester gripped Cas tight and saved him from the Empty. Three hundred and ninety-four days since Dean had first kissed Cas, his face streaming with tears and his heart pouring long-kept secrets. Fifty-six weeks of happiness; in having, in being, and in saying all they’d never dared admit all these years. And still, Cas smiled as he watched his truth settle in the blush of Dean’s ears and the twitch of the corner of his lips.

A full grin broke out on the angel’s face. It was one thing to have his full grace intact; his wings no longer bent and broken. It was another gift entirely to see the whole of Dean again. He’d missed the ability to see the radiance of Dean’s soul; a bright and burning thing, guiding Cas home with more certainty than any star ever could. To see the flare of Dean’s joy light up his soul because of Cas – because Cas was Dean’s happiness, too.

Cas pulled back the smallest amount, watching in awe as Dean slowly opened his eyes. Between his fingers cupping Dean’s cheeks, he could see the stunning flush of colour brightening around the freckles. Snowflakes fell on Dean’s long lashes, bringing all the shades of green in his shining eyes to life. Plumes of breath ghosted between them in the freezing December air.

Dean held Cas’ stare. The angel felt no shame in the intensity of his admiration, but it was a rare thing that Dean didn’t try to shy away. Instead, Dean leaned forward, his lips already parting for a kiss. But Cas leaned away once more, the grin on his face fading to the sweetest of smiles when Dean looked at him in question.

Cas was quiet as he traced the pad of his thumb along Dean’s lower lip. Watched as Dean’s mouth opened for him instinctively. He tracked the snow as it kissed Dean’s freckles, falling down his cheeks and coming to rest by Cas’ fingers.

“You’re beautiful,” Cas breathed. “All of you. You are so beautiful, Dean.”

He felt the rush of heat on Dean’s cheeks, eyes dropping to his mouth when Dean nervously licked his lips.

“You’re… you –“ Dean’s words died on his tongue as Cas pressed two fingers to his lips. Their eyes locked as Dean gently bit the tips of Cas’ fingers, his tongue pressing between them. A soft hiss escaped Cas’ lips and the pleasant shiver that danced along his spine had nothing to do with the steady drop in temperature. With his own lip trapped between his teeth, Cas tilted his head back and looked down at Dean’s lips as he slowly removed his fingers. Dean’s eyes were glazed, the weight of his body now resting mostly against the angel’s torso.

“You gonna kiss me about it or not?”

Cas smirked at the hoarseness of Dean’s voice. He ran one hand along Dean’s jaw, coming to rest on his neck. Could feel the erratic pulse of Dean’s heartbeat beneath his fingers. With his other hand, he raked his fingers through Dean’s damp hair, fist closing at the back of his head. It was difficult to fight off the smile as Cas recalled the last conversation they’d had about Dean’s hair, in the smallest hours of the night with nothing but their skin to separate them. How happy the soft, grown out length made Dean. How it gave Cas something to hold on to.

Without giving himself time to overthink it, Cas knocked Dean to his back in the snow, laying his full weight atop him. Their lips crashed together, mouths parting instantly to deepen the kiss. Dean’s hands were ice cold on Cas’ skin as they dipped beneath his sweater, pulling him closer still by the hips. At either side of them, the print of Cas’ wings remained undisturbed, flaring wide in a perfect display of blasphemy. Already, they were panting, rutting, breathless and desperate for more, always more.

“Love you so damn much, Cas,” Dean managed between kisses. Cas’ breath hitched as Dean focused his attention to his neck, his hips rolling against Cas’ own.

Dean was cold. Winter had no affect on an angel, and though he could heal even the most minor cold, it was Christmas. And there was a perfectly warm bed waiting for them just a few blocks away. But Dean kept kissing along Cas’ jaw, breathlessly whispering a string of “I love you, I love you, don’t ever leave me again.”

A soft groan left Cas’ lips as he pressed Dean harder into the frozen earth, kissing him senselessly, desperate to get closer, starving for more. His grace glowed beneath his skin. It didn’t matter that he’d heard the words a hundred times before. Dean loved him, Dean wanted him, and there was no getting used to the overwhelming joy of it. Of being loved. Loved by Dean. Cas trailed one hand beneath the waistband of Dean’s pants, and Dean gasped at the shock of cold. He paused, waiting for an indication to stop or keep going. He allowed Dean to roll him on to his side, their legs tangling and fingers fumbling for zips and buttons.

Dean’s hands were pinkened with the bite of frost. Cas caught them between his own, blowing warm breath against them.

“You’re too cold,” Cas said heavily, the admission like a tragic defeat.

Dean pushed a leg between Cas’ thighs. “’m fine.”

Cas glared. “You could die.”

Dean smiled against Cas’ lips. “I dunno, man. Seems like a good way to go.”

“Dean.” Cas said, his voice deep and the set of his jaw stubborn.

“Come on, sweetheart. I’ll make it worth your while,” he said, pulling back enough for Cas to see his ridiculous pout.

Cas kissed him sweetly, tangling one hand in Dean’s hair before pulling it gently to break the kiss. “I thought we were done dying for each other.”

Dean sighed, nuzzling into Cas’ neck. “Yeah, yeah.” Already he was sniffling, and Cas suspected the close proximity had as much to do with needing warmth as it did needing him.

Cas sighed, contented, if a little frustrated their fun had to be cut short. For now, he told himself, eyeing the darkening clouds above. With one hand, Cas redid the buttons on both of their pants, his other stroking through Dean’s hair. “I love you, too, Dean,” he said, his voice losing strength with the enormity of the words, even as his heart beat stronger than ever. “I’ll love you long after this world fades, no matter what the future brings. You’re alive, Dean, and you’re mine. You’ve always been my heart.”

Dean held him tight enough to cut off his air supply. It was another perk of being an angel; to be durable enough to carry the enormity of love this human man had in his patchwork heart. Dean’s whole body seemed to collapse in relief against him, his exhale long and shaky. Cas wrapped a wing around him, shielding Dean as best he could until he felt that his heartbeat steady once more.

“Merry Christmas, sunshine,” Dean mumbled against Cas’ neck.

“In a few hours it will be,” Cas wondered aloud. Midnight wasn’t far off, and he found he was excited to spend a holiday with everyone they cared about. His family.

Dean pulled back to look him in the eye, mischief gleaming in his own. “I hope so,” he said, wagging his brows.

Cas sat up despite Dean’s protests, rolling his eyes hard but losing the battle against his own hopeful smile. “You did promise to make it worth my while.”

“That I did,” Dean managed to pull him in for one last, gentle kiss before Cas pulled him to his feet. “Guess it’s time to go be merry and gay, huh?”

Cas tilted his head. A smile crept along his lips as he nodded in agreement. “In my case, yes. Merry and bi for you.”

Dean snorted. “Well, you got me there, sweetheart,” he said, curling his fingers through Cas’ own as they made their way back.

Stepping through the door of the lake house, they were met with a wave of heat and the overwhelming scent of cinnamon and clove. One glance out of the corner of his eye had Cas’ heart squeeze in relief.

Dean was smiling again.

Dean pressed a quick kiss to Cas’ cheek and mumbled something about a sewing kit. Cas supposed he should take the opportunity to give Claire her gift a day early but found her and Kaia wrapped in an embrace beneath a bundle of mistletoe Eileen had hung up. Neither girl noticed his arrival, so Cas left the gift back beneath the tree, smiling fondly to himself.

An hour later, three mismatching tables had been pulled together and set with steaming bowls of food and several bottles of mulled wine. Rowena sat at the head, swirling the wine in her glass, deep in conversation with Eileen. Sam sat to Eileen’s right, and beside him, Kaia was fixing the braid in Claire’s hair. Jody and Donna faced them, causing Cas to smile shyly as they teased the girls about them both being almost as lovesick as Dean and he were. He sat next to Charlie, who was currently fixing a paper hat to a bemused Stevie’s head.

A moment later, Jack came into view. His Christmas sweater no longer covered his hands or hung almost to his knees, and along with the bells, some of the flashing reindeer ornaments from the tree had been added.

“They match my antlers!” Jack said, pointing to his flashing headband. “Dean did it for me! Doesn’t it look awesome?”

Pride swelled in Cas’ chest at the unfounded joy on his son’s face. He looked up to see Dean dropping into the seat opposite him.

When Jack wasn’t looking, Dean rolled his eyes at the flashing sweater, but the affect was entirely lost with the smile tugging on his lips.

“Thank you, Dean,” Cas said, reaching out to squeeze Dean’s knee beneath the table.

Dean swallowed hard and nodded. Turning his attention to Jack, he said, “looks awesome, right?”

Dinner lasted late into the evening. It was hours before anyone but Cas felt up for moving from the table to the huge living room, but the open fire was too enticing.

The music and merriment went on long into the night. Cas, Dean, and Jack had arrived at the lake house the previous evening. It had been such a long night of putting up decorations (Dean was particularly proud of his contribution of a cowboy hat at the top of the tree) and watching reruns of old Christmas movies that Dean had fallen asleep in his boots and jeans the moment he and Cas had gone to their room.

After their long journeys and heavy meal, it was hardly midnight when one by one, everyone slipped away to their room in anticipation for Christmas morning.

The cold moon of winter bright through their bedroom window; the air charged in anticipation. Cas led Dean to their four-poster bed. The embers in the fireplace opposite and glass lanterns at either side of the bed were all that lit the room.

Learning the map of Dean’s body was much more an honour than a process. Cas knew that if he placed a hand on Dean’s chest anywhere below his second rib, Dean would inhale the softest breath. If he held fast to Dean’s hip, Cas’ thumb would fit perfectly to the groove of the bone. He knew that running his fingers along Dean’s softened belly would cause his best friend to shut his eyes, exhaling softly into the safety of the touch. Yet every now and then, Dean still managed to surprise him.

Twelve years Cas had watched over Dean; stealing glances that broke his own heart all the while. Thirteen months, he’d spent rebuilding his beliefs. Finding faith in a love he never dared imagine he could have. Cas, no longer an angel of heaven, an agent of fate, but a person of his own. He’d torn out the pages his father had written for them and found healing in rewriting their story.

For millennia, the angel believed faith was a thing of duty and obedience, servitude and suffering. Without the wrath of a god grown bored, Cas found that faith was family.

He found that he was loved, more dearly and in more ways than any angel in history had ever been.

Taglist (let me know if you want to be added/removed!) <3

@floorcas @emeraldcas @supernatural-jaeger @blue-eyed-cutiepatootie @jactingjoices @fandoms-and-things @caskarass @you-cant-spell-subtext-without @jacobglaser @destieldisaster @fanguuuuuurl

#its a little angsty for the first quarter but its all fluff from there!#if i forgot to tag anyone i'm so sorry!#first writing I’ve been able to do in ages 😭#destiel #deancas #christmas fluff #dean winchester #castiel #ao3: fallenangelofthursday #destiel fics #bi dean #giving dean the gift of therapy and gay [gunshots] 😌#my writing

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mimir-anoshe · 4 years

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List 5 TV shows that make you feel better, then tag 10 other blogs.

Tagged by @lopeforrestlope thanks mate 💕🤗

1. ATLA - Avatar the Last Airbender (dudes this is my childhood, my legend, it brings tears of joy and laughter always) + Toph is my Spirit animal so there's that. The gAang is my original found family and I will love them forever and always🤘🥺❤️

2. THE ADVENTURES OF MERLIN - My guy, my dude, Merlin and Arthur are my gay King Wizard (Wizing/Kizard) dork couple of the (12th) century (and Gwen keeping her boys in check). Gwain is a living mood, and Killghara just gets me... I too would want to crispy bacon Uther's ass. The absolute sass, the comedic genius, the fucking heartbreak, the drama, the early 2000's BBC CGI budget mmm *chefs kiss*

3. Firefly - Will I ever forgive the network for not giving this show the gazillion seasons it deserved? Nope. Will I always cherish the episodes I was given? Absolutely, for fucking ever. Space cowboys with awesome action and hilarious humour/character dynamics that would make any writer swoon. Also I had the biggest crush on Kaylee! You can't take the sky from me!

4. Fairy Tail - The first anime that I ever really watched. Fond memories of me and my brother just having a blast binging over 300 episodes of it together, going on adventures with the guild. It will always bring a smile to my face and a "fairy tale" like magic to my heart 🧙🦄🐲 Snow fairy makes me cry 🧚❄️ every time. (Also NaLu was my gateway to Tumblr so it's technically why I'm even on this hellsite 🤪🤣) If you're noticing a pattern of found family shows, then you are absolutely fucking right!! This one's for you little bro, I'll always be watching over you, no matter how far👆❤️

5. Julie and the Himbos Phantoms - the newest on this list, yet within only a week it has captured my heart and soul, it has made me laugh aloud and cry weeping grief. I went into it expecting an American cheesy teen sing song HSM esc monstrosity, and in some ways I got that, but boy was it so much more! The songs! The characters! The themes! The humour! The LADS!! JULIE "I'LL BREAK YOU" MOLINA!!! 🤭I relate to Alex SO MUCH, Luke too, and REGGIE 😂HONESTLY he sends me. My s.o. went "that looks so cheesy" right in front of my face and I literally hissed like a hellcat and went "excuse me sir that's my emotional support show!" 🤣🤣 Of the apocalyptic hellscape 2020 been, the fact that it's given me this show is a fucking light in the dark, one that'll make me raise my voice to the rain forever🎸🎹🎧❤️🥁🤙💕 They are my newest found family children and I love them your honor 🌺😎🥰

Ok well there you go! All my favourite series and emotional support shows! I would've put the 100 but the way it ended sent me into a depression spiral and I needed these shows above to get me out of it^ (Honourable mention for seasons 1-4, but I need to move on, Jason can drown in his own ego for all I care 🤘BELLARKE lives on💕). Another honourable mention to The Mandalorian 🙏 (lmao another found family what is wrong with me?) Djin and his bb 🥺 *dies from💘*

Tagging: @head-and-heart @justalittlebluetiefling @levimikasa @bellarkestories @bellamynochillblake @cassianandfenrysaremyboyos @mischiefavenged1309 @bre95611 @kofiscrib @abandoned-as-mustard

Or anyone who wants to. I'm terrible with blog names (and names in general) so I just picked familiar mutuals/random, but you're all welcome to have at it! 🤘😁

#ATLA #atla spoilers #Merlin #the adventures of Merlin #merlin bbc #merlin spoilers #firefly #firefly spoilers #fairy tail #fairy tail spoilers #julie and the phantoms #jatp spoilers #tag game #mad mimir meanders #my emotional support shows #my blog #whelp... there ye have it #my heart and soul laid bare 💘😎

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phornex · 6 years

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drarry fic recs, may 2018

Charmed Confections by Alisanne (36k words, slash/explicit)

There’s a new bakery in town, and Harry is obsessed with the luscious lemon fairy cakes. And with discovering the identity of the mystery chef.

cakes, cool slytherins, open and honest conversations about feelings, implied kitchen sex.

Growing Deep Like Roots by hibye (68k words, fluff)

After breaking up with Ginny, Harry heads to Hogwarts to teach for a change of pace. He loves it. There's lots of time to spend with his kids, friends, and family. It's everything he could have hoped for, only he wasn't expecting Draco Malfoy. He wasn't expecting to fall in love with him, either.

lots of weasleys, some good draco rehabilitation, lovely older gay dudes falling in love

Then Comes a Mist and a Weeping Rain by faithwood (21k words, fluff)

It always rains for Draco Malfoy. Metaphorically. And literally. Ever since he had accidentally Conjured a cloud. A cloud that's ever so cross.

super fluffy but very cute, magical clouds and quidditch

The Frisky Furnishings of Malfoy Manor by Writcraft (20k, mostly fluff, some sex)

Hermione has a crafty plan, Harry and Draco are fake boyfriends and wizarding traditions have a lot to answer for. Featuring awkward dates, mince pies, a saucy sofa and a line of sequined house-elf haute couture nobody asked for but got anyway.

the summary for this is rubbish, and the base story of Draco & Harry pretending to be in a relationship is kind of silly, but the idea of Harry soothing furniture around Malfoy Manor is wonderful.

After The Tournament by bluewerewolfprose (115k words incomplete, fluff/smut, au)

What if Remus and Sirius realised Harry was being abused? What if all Dumbledore’s careful plans were pulled apart by the power he relied on most of all? After the Triwizard Tournament, a traumatised Harry admits he can't go back to Privet Drive. Sirius and Remus refuse to submit to Dumbledore's plan and take him back to Grimmauld Place with them, where they must learn how to live together, how to care for one another, and how to trust one another. After so long, can they build a family together? Will they even have a chance when a war rages outside their door? And can the prophecy ever be fulfilled?

this fic has so much character development, satisfying corrections of canon fuck-ups, and a good trans character, written by a trans author. and it kept me up until 5am.

#drarry #drarry recs #drarry fanfiction #recs #draco/harry

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poorquentyn · 7 years

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Wait a sec so Whorsebane is suppose to be an intimidating character even for somebody like Roose,I feel like I missed this. Also he's gay I feel like I missed that also. Which if he is is kinda cool that he's this intimidating gay man from a house known to be imposing and intimidating.

*rubs hands together* Yes, please, let’s take a deep dive into the characterization of Hother “Whoresbane” Umber, the smartest and most dangerous member of his clan and one of my favorite background characters in all of ASOIAF.

Does “most dangerous Umber” seem like a stretch? Don’t get me wrong, I certainly wouldn’t want Crowfood or the Greatjon mad at me, but they’re presented as jovial life-of-the-party drunks as much as badasses. There’s a wry affectionate “oh, you scamps” sort of tone to how GRRM writes the Umber men…except Whoresbane, who is framed with an ice-cold laser-focused menace about him that his kin do not possess, despite Hother being the least physically imposing of the lot. Within the Northern political community, “Old Whoresbane” has a well-established reputation as perhaps the most fearsome figure within that community, a living legend spoken of in whispers (rather than the loud-and-proud stories surrounding big brother Mors), someone with whom you simply do not fuck if you care to see another spring:

A crow had once taken Mors for dead and pecked out his eye, so he wore a chunk of dragonglass in its stead. As Old Nan told the tale, he’d grabbed the crow in his fist and bitten its head off, so they named him Crowfood. She would never tell Bran why his gaunt brother Hother was called Whoresbane.

Odd as it might seem, old Hoarfrost Umber had once believed his youngest son had the makings of a maester. Mors loved to boast about the crow who took his eye, but Hother’s tale was only told in whispers…most like because the whore he’d disemboweled had been a man.

And now the Bastard of Bolton was riding south with Hother Umber to join them for an attack on Moat Cailin. “The Whoresbane his own self,” claimed a riverman who’d just brought a load of hides and timber down the White Knife, “with three hundred spearmen and a hundred archers. Some Hornwood men have joined them, and Cerwyns too.”

“Night work is not knight’s work,” Lady Dustin said. “And Lord Wyman is not the only man who lost kin at your Red Wedding, Frey. Do you imagine Whoresbane loves you any better? If you did not hold the Greatjon, he would pull out your entrails and make you eat them, as Lady Hornwood ate her fingers.”

“Fear is what keeps a man alive in this world of treachery and deceit. Even here in Barrowton the crows are circling, waiting to feast upon our flesh. The Cerwyns and the Tallharts are not to be relied on, my fat friend Lord Wyman plots betrayal, and Whoresbane…the Umbers may seem simple, but they are not without a certain low cunning.”

But, I hear you protest again: more menacing than Roose Bolton? Surely not! Well, look at how Roose himself describes Whoresbane. That ellipsis speaks volumes: Whoresbane Umber is so thoroughly intimidating that Roose gods-damned Bolton, the Leech Lord, Westeros’ answer to Vlad the Impaler, is reduced to trailing off and staring into the middle distance, ultimately unable to bring himself to cite specifics.

That’s the first layer. The second layer is the implication that Whoresbane has been the brains of Last Hearth for a very, very long time. He was only at the Citadel in the first place because his father Hoarfrost (which: yes) believed he had “the makings of a maester,” which certainly bucks the Umber stereotype. After Hother came home, his status as the smartest man in the room–a Halfmaester, if you will–has held as the decades have gone by. The Greatjon is certainly not an idiot (just look at how he tests and then crowns Robb), but his grab-with-both-hands approach to life carries with it some significant blind spots, and it’s Whoresbane who rides to Winterfell to point them out:

Hother wanted ships. “There’s wildlings stealing down from the north, more than I’ve ever seen before. They cross the Bay of Seals in little boats and wash up on our shores. The crows in Eastwatch are too few to stop them, and they go to ground quick as weasels. It’s longships we need, aye, and strong men to sail them. The Greatjon took too many. Half our harvest is gone to seed for want of arms to swing the scythes.”

Contrast Hother with Mors, and the picture becomes crystal clear. Crowfood, too, is far from stupid, but he comes to Winterfell to dance with the serving girls and offer his magical grief-curing cock to Lady Hornwood. Whoresbane is the one with the numbers in his head, the one keeping track of the harvest and the wildlings, the one looking out for the smallfolk of Last Hearth. Crowfood is doing everything he can to escape his brother’s household; Whoresbane is the one the Greatjon trusted to keep the lights on and bring concerns to the Stark in Winterfell.

And yes, as that anecdote about his time in Oldtown reveals, Whoresbane is gay. (Or possibly bi, but again, Crowfood is the one who asks for Lady Hornwood’s hand and macks on the serving girls, whereas Whoresbane shows interest in neither.) For me, this is part of an overall characterization in which Whoresbane defies the public image of his House and yet somehow also turns that image up to 11. Hother Umber is a gay man in a family of aggressively straight dudes, a “gaunt” and “cadaverous” man in a family of larger-than-life giants, an intellectual in a family of jocks, and is still the most metal of them all, and everyone knows it. How can you not love that?

What really cements Whoresbane as one of my favorites, though, are the hints about what the payoff for this characterization will look like. In ADWD, Whoresbane joins Team Bolton, taking half the remaining Umber men to the Dreadfort (and from there to Moat Cailin, Barrowton, and finally Winterfell) while leaving the rest with Crowfood. As Barbrey tells us, though, there’s no pretense that he’s actually loyal to Roose and Ramsay. Indeed, in Theon’s first ADWD chapter, we see that Whoresbane is wearing armor even to dinner, and can’t stop himself from expressing disgust at Ramsay’s treatment of Theon. And then, in Theon’s released TWOW chapter, we learn a very telling detail:

“Mors took the green boys and Hother took the greybeards.”

Whoresbane didn’t just randomly select half the remaining men at Last Hearth. He specifically brought his fellow greybeards with him. And what is it that old Northmen do when the food runs short as we know it is at Last Hearth (“half our harvest is gone to seed for want of arms to swing the scythes”), when winter is no longer coming, but here?

Alys sighed. “My father took so many of our men south with him that only the women and young boys were left to bring the harvest in. Them, and the men too old or crippled to go off to war. Crops withered in the fields or were pounded into the mud by autumn rains. And now the snows are come. This winter will be hard. Few of the old people will survive it, and many children will perish as well.”

It was a tale that any northmen knew well. “My father’s grandmother was a Flint of the mountains, on his mother’s side,” Jon told her. “The First Flints, they call themselves. They say the other Flints are the blood of younger sons, who had to leave the mountains to find food and land and wives. It has always been a harsh life up there. When the snows fall and food grows scarce, their young must travel to the winter town or take service at one castle or the other. The old men gather up what strength remains in them and announce that they are going hunting. Some are found come spring. More are never seen again.”

“Winter is almost upon us, boy. And winter is death. I would sooner my men die fighting for the Ned’s little girl than alone and hungry in the snow, weeping tears that freeze upon their cheeks. No one sings songs of men who die like that. As for me, I am old. This will be my last winter. Let me bathe in Bolton blood before I die. I want to feel it spatter across my face when my axe bites deep into a Bolton skull. I want to lick it off my lips and die with the taste of it on my tongue.”

So I think Whoresbane’s master plan (and given all of the the above, I’d say it’s very much his plan, and Crowfood is following his lead) is to lead the old men on a glorious kamikaze mission against the hated Boltons, while Crowfood preserves the next generation, who now may have enough to eat. Like his great-nephew Smalljon, he’ll go down a Stark man to the end, Umber on the inside where it counts.

#whoresbane umber #crowfood umber #roose bolton #twow spoilers #asoiaf meta

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keepyourpantsongohan · 7 years

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Ayesha Liveblogs Naruto Shippuden S19

Lmao @ Shikamaru flirting with Temari before greeting the Kazekage #Priorities

Why bother giving these kids the data from those chunin exams they were there they ARE the data

“You'd know more about the reason behind the interruption of the final rounds and its chronology” Shizune fucking calling out the Sand omg ‘remember when u tried to murder us? I do’

“She hasn't changed a bit” and u love her for it Shikamaru

Why is Kakashi even here lmao he doesn't have a team of Genin this time around it's just because he's competent and adorable I guess

The Team 7 outro I weep SP is really stabbing me in the heart

Fu is a handful and I love it

“You want to find some way to bond with the rebels?” historically that's actually worked out pretty well it seems

I'M SCREAMING ARE WE GONNA SEE SAKURA'S CHUNIN EXAM

“She just might be tougher than [Shikamaru]” Ino <3 Sakura 5ever

KAKASHI COME INSPIRE YOUR BABY GENIN SHE DESERVES THIS

I feel a little ripped off that Kakashi didn't get to be the Angel of Cheering People Up but I'm proud of Sakura either way and I am i n l o v e with the idea of watching her Chunin exams

They were so excited to see Naruto it's a shame he's not real

This timeline where everyone takes the Chunin exams a year before Naruto comes back implies that there were at minimum 9 Leaf Chunin made in a single exam

It also puts very little distance between Neji making Chunin and Jonin but I guess to be fair Kakashi was made a jonin at 9

Hjghdskhfhlvhl Team Guy Dynamics:

Tenten: We're being split up?

Lee: We'll be on our own for this?

Neji: [already walking away]

SHIKAMARU INVIGILATES LIKE A SUPER VILLAIN WHAT A DRAMA HOE

“Thanks for having my back” Literally half of Shikamaru's screen time is flirting with Temari I love it

Neji why do you have to be so dramatic do you really need to use jutsu as visual aids in your explanations

THIS BITCH FIGHT BETWEEN NEJI AND THE SAND SHINOBI IS SO GREAT

Sand Siblings @ Gaara probably: Will you stop talking about Naruto for like ten fucking seconds

Neji stepping in to save his girl Tenten my heart

Fu is so cute omg “I want to make a hundred friends”

I'm willing to believe Neji can recognize a jinchuriki's chakra right away bc of his fight with Naruto

“Dwelling on the misfortunes of birth is meaningless” same Shira same

I have a hard time believing Sakura couldn't take down that scorpion without Fu but plot I guess

I CAN'T BELIEVE FU JUST ASKED THE KAZEKAGE TO TAKE A BATH WITH HER

“Gaara!” “Sorry, just thinking” Fuck how often does Temari have to shake Gaara out of thinking about Naruto lmao

Kiba has to spread his legs as widely as possible mid-air his philosophy is truly ‘Dicks out for Shinobi’

Ninja who are about to partake in infiltration, loudly: Scatter!

I also have a hard time believing that a Byakugan user of Neji's skill would be so easily taken in by genjutsu

Honestly Team Guy is prime OT3 material their teamwork is amazing and they lift each other up constantly

This is the second time in this set of exams that Team Guy has helped not only their competitors but also ninja from a different village the Leaf truly raises their babies right

“I wanna know which one's more valuable to the village... is it the boulder or you?” Still working on the charisma thing huh Gaara

Every mission Team Guy goes on:

Tenten/Neji: Lee how about we think about this before we start-

Lee: JUMPING INTO ACTION

“Please apologize to him!” I adore Lee

I'M SCREAMING NEJI IMPLYING THAT HE IS RIVALS WITH NARUTO INSTEAD OF LEE HE'S TRYING TO BREAK UP THE BAND

‘Hey Shira what's your technique?’ ‘Breathing really hard’

“Two Heaven scrolls. When should I break it to them?” Further proof that Dad!Neji would be ridiculous he has trouble breaking bad news to friends let alone babies

Kiba @ Hinata: Pay! Attention! To! Me!

I fucking love how Kiba has no qualms about anything gross like biting a slimy guy ‘let me at him’, breathing into my dog's nose ‘of course’, running around covered in dog urine ‘just a Tuesday’

These episodes have reawakened the inner Kiba/Hinata shipper in me

“Forget I ever mentioned Naruto okay?” omg I’m not sure I’ve ever seen Kiba blush before but the second he was called out about Naruto there it is

“Their persistence is extraordinary” this is true about the entire village tbh

It’s not fair of you to compare your shadow clone abilities to a boy with a chakra demon inside of him Kiba

“I can tell just how hard Naruto trained out here” so what ur saying is that u smell Naruto’s sweat

Kiba’s sure ready to brag for someone whose plan was just playing dead

“It’s the fault of the whole team” I don’t remember this guy’s name but I have a feeling that if Minato were alive he’d love him

“No you’re wrong it was me” Ggfkjghdfkghkd Kiba pls why are you like this

“Be nice and give us your scroll” tru Shinobi of the Leaf

The Look(TM) Neji gives Lee when he gets Tenten in a bad mood

TENTEN’S HONESTLY WATCHING NEJI FROM THE BUSHES WHILE HE TRAINS LIKE HE DOES NOT HAVE THE BYAKUGAN

“We’re able to fight so aggressively because we know that you have our backs” Guy is such a supportive sensei 10/10 (no pun intended)

“How did they turn out anyway?” “I have my doubts about them” LEE PLS

Real talk does the Akatsuki not know that the person hosting these exams is a jinchuriki he is the Kazekage

“Hi there, are you guys cliff-climbing too? Hang in there” KAKASHI HATAKE WITH SHITTY TRAINING PUNS COMING 2 SAVE MY LIFE

Honestly Guy is the only sensei who seems to train his own kunoichi directly because both Ino and Hinata have clan-based jutsu and all of Kakashi’s babies were taken in by the Sanin

“The great nations don’t understand pain” like half the Leaf Village is orphans what more do u want from them Ajisai

“The Hidden Rain will soon be reborn” “Does that mean you’re gonna be more friendly then?” suffice to say the answer was no

Love my Leaf boys who won’t let people from other villages be attacked in an unfair way even by their own fellow villagers

Lee realizing that trash-talking insects doesn’t really work lmao

Props to Lee for not holding a grudge against Gaara because he was both the reason he was injured before the last invasion and also one of the invaders

“Sensei, have I gotten stronger since the last Chunin exam?” “Well, you should have” Inspiring self-confidence with Might Guy

What a gentle and peppy intro it’s a change of pace from the intense bops

Thank you!!!!! I still don’t understand why Sakura couldn’t take out the first insect because she’s like the strongest woman alive

Omg Ino gently taking Sakura’s hand to heal it my bisexual heart <3

“Where’s Shikamaru?” “He’s seeing off the delegates from the Hidden Sand” HE’S FLIRTING WITH TEMARI MY BOI

I aspire 2 be as committed to avoiding talking about my feelings as Asuma Sarutobi

Tsunade just doesn’t have the energy to entertain student rivalry lol

“You just broke my concentration since you kept peeking over at me” this entire episode is incredibly gay and I love it

“Because of you, I’m going to the place where I belong” this is ninja code for gay marriage (see: Tenzo’s infinite Tsukuyomi scene)

I LOVE SAKURA SHE PICKED A FIGHT WITH A SCORPION TO GET DINNER FOR HER FRIENDS MY KIND OF GAL

It actually makes complete sense that Tsunade never intended for Ino to become a medical ninja because it’s not Ino’s strongest technique but it’s useful on multiple levels

I don’t know what Ino’s future job is supposed to be but I hope it’s Head of the intelligence division bc of Inoichi’s legacy

Honestly Sakura becomes even more impressive when you consider every battle she fought up until the war she was consistently depleting her chakra it’s a disadvantage similar to Kakashi’s sharingan and yet she not only managed to keep from being hospitalized but also was able to fight the Akatsuki and perform surgery

Honestly what on earth is this Sasuke business what a non-sequitor

Take a shot every time Orochimaru kidnaps a child

The fact that Sakura braces for impact bc she won’t even consider dodging at the cost of abandoning Ino’s body nfdgbfdgjdhfb

“I don’t care about the Chunin exams, I want to have my revenge!” okay Anime Bride of Chuckie

“He’s probably forgotten all about you and has already found a better partner” Kurama truly hitting Naruto where it hurts

I’m so proud of Sakura she is absolutely fucking adorable

“Gaara, let’s get dinner” I’ve never heard those words said so intensely

Why is the animation on this sand so much better than the animation on literally anything else

“Make sure he doesn’t step foot outside” lmao @ Gaara’s siblings trying to babysit him even though he’s the leader of the village

FURTHER LAUGHTER AT GAARA SNEAKING OUT OF HIS ROOM LIKE THE TEENAGER HE IS

“This will take a lot more than gutsiness to overcome” [Naruto in the distance: How dare u Neji]

TEAM GUY CUDDLING OUT THE SANDSTORM I LOVE THEM!!!!

“I told you I was right,” said Mikoshi, as he began to drown in a pit of sand

Oh my god Fu wants to make a hundred friends to end all wars what a gal

“He sounds exactly like the kind of guy I’d like to meet and become friends with” that’s actually sad both because she dies before she can really know Naruto but he does meet her eventually through the tailed beasts

“Well, see ya!” jbfjhdkfjhgkjh Team Jonin Sensei is truly a beautiful thing

It takes the Akatsuki like three days to extract a tailed beast and this dude is trying to do it in 30 seconds good luck my dude

Poor Neji he can’t stand to disappoint other people

“We can’t just ignore someone in distress” Team Guy Saving People During the Chunin Exams Count: 4 <333

Take a shot every time someone on this show fantasizes about Naruto

“Yes, but that’s only because he’s a fool” this might be the closest Gaara has come to insulting Naruto in years

I want so badly for Neji and Gaara to be friends I love lonely ninja boys

"Get ready Fu, you’re next!” “Okay!!” I’ve never seen someone look so excited to get poked in the stomach

“I thank you, Neji. Never thought you’d rescue me” Team Guy Saving People During the Chunin Exams Count: 7

Take a shot every time Gaara tells someone about his crush on Naruto

“I wanted to try to heal the hurt I’d caused everyone” Gaara <3

Why are there so many heaven scrolls that seems to be all that anyone has

Gaara @ all the exam participants: You get to be a Chunin! You get to be a Chunin! Everyone gets to be a Chunin!

OH MY GOD I JUST REALIZED THAT AJISAI IS ONE OF THE BODIES OF PAIN I DIDN’T REALIZE IT UNTIL THE EXAM WAS OVER BUT THEY’RE ABOUT TO CONFIRM IT

Are we about to watch a montage of all the people who died since the Chunin exams

Oh my GOD Fu trying to befriend Kakuzu RIP

Well I guess Neji’s double promotion makes way more sense than him taking a Jonin exam like months after his Chunin exam but still what an arbitrary decision-making process

#ayesha talks anime #ayesha liveblogs nahruto shipduden #liveblogging

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darkstrangevirgilanxiboi · 7 years

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Shit I Pulled In High School

So my friend and I got talking about the good old days and it hit me that I've probably got some mildly entertaining tales from my teenage years ( which only ended four years ago I can't believe I made it to 23 ) So here's a few of the shenanigans Hot Mess High School Me got into ~ ( I went to a weird school that threw grades 7 -12 together in the same buildings so this is at the same school the whole time just not divided into middle school and high school ) 7th Grade - Made the art teacher gasp because I knew a surprising amount about Medieval art styles ( I'm obsessed with history and the Medieval era is just such a hot mess of a time) - Got scolded in Math class for reading , learned to read more stealthily - Memorized the coded language from ' Vladimir Todd ' , a popular teen book series about a sarcastic teenage vampire who just wants to be normal, and used it to write notes in class Eventually this resulted in my getting sent to the counselor because the teacher suspected me of being a cult leader I ran with that assumption and to this day the school still thinks I founded the cult of Vladimirism , a cult devoted to the protection and support of rebellious teen outcasts , queer kids , and unfairly treated main characters ( we're a small cult but we are very nice and membership is free , we spread love and rebellion , our mascot is a baby bat ) - Started a week long debate on sexism in history class with my teacher , which resulted in him actually awarding the most fervent arguers a free soda Turned out it was just a scam of his to see how many of us were actually morally upstanding , and which ones were rooted deep in the patriarchal bullshit . I got a soda AND a candy bar because I kicked off the debate by asking " We talk a lot about oppressed groups but we haven't talked about women yet, do you think women aren't oppressed?" Which got a sexist boy in back to go " Women don't count " And I snapped back " Women can count higher than YOU" 8th Grade - Caused an ethical , moral, and spiritual debate in my Seminary class over abortion that ended with three girls declaring themselves Athiests - Accused my Seminary Teacher of racism and sexism for his assumption that God is white and male - Got kicked out of Seminary for arguing with the teacher about God hating gay people , and instead of going back in after ten minutes I just left and went to my friend's house - Called out my chemistry teacher for overlooking the accomplishments of women in the scientific fields - Accidentally became a student librarian because I spent so much time there and I memorized the book keeping system - Was officially the most well-read student and got an award for checking out over thirty books in a month 9th Grade - Got suspended because a teacher heard me singing P!nk's " Fun House " and thought the lyric ' burn this sucker down' was a threat of arson so I got to meet the Sheriff ( who incidentally was the father of one of my classmates and who still invited me to his daughter's birthday party the next week ) and even though Sheriff Brooks was intimidating I cry REALLY easily so I got off with a warning despite me never remotely intending to burn my school down I got suspended for a week but it was actually fine , and the Sheriff was super chill to me after that - Was extra enough to get voted Most Dramatic in the yearbook Was it because I frequently flopped down on the floor to nap if I was tired? Or was it my complete overreaction to anything unexpected? Maybe it was my scathing remarks to everything ' Do you want to be study buddies' ' Brittany, why would I want to study with someone with can't spell their name right ' Or my dramatic reactions to anything even slightly inconvient ' THE HEAVENS ARE DISPLEASED WITH YOU MERE MORTALS, THEY WEEP AT YOUR FAILURES " ' It's just raining calm down ' ' dude I'm more concerned about the fact she referred to US as mortals but not her? ' ' Aw man , the cafeteria is out of pudding cups ' " THE FIRST PLAGUE BEGINS , WE WERE WARNED OF THIS IN THE PROPHECY " " What? What prophecy? " 10th Grade - Got caught writing fan fiction in class but didn't get in trouble because my teacher was a hardcore Harry Potter fan and he just wanted to read the story ( it was a Weasley Twins Deathly Hallows AU and I'll post it on ao3 if you wantttt) - Skipped school like six times to watch Inuyasha with my friend Melanie ( I faked being sick and just went to her house instead of going home) - Became the school's top badass because I stealthily orchestrated the expulsion of every kid who bullied me or my siblings and never got caught ( hey Ashley Bassett if you're reading this I snitched on you , and I don't regret it ) 11th Grade - Planned a prank that scared my U.S.Marine drama coach so much he almost called in reinforcements I got my whole Drama class to fake a murder scene in the auditorium because Tony ( our coach) said we didn't act dead convincingly . So we faked a Sweeney Todd worthy slaughter fest , making it appear as though thirty teens were brutally murdered . It was GLORIOUS. My friend Indi runs out into the hall , knowing Tony is just entering the building , and he first thing Tony sees is an apparently mortally wounded kid running toward him, gasping out last words. ' They...got ...us ...They got all of us....run....SAVE YOURSELF " And then Indi collapses right there , looking for all the world like he's dead , and poor Tony just panics and burst into the auditorium , flips the lights on, and screams We listen to him freak out for a minute, but as he pulls out his phone to call the cops , Indi sneaks up behind him and taps his shoulder and goes " Was that convincing enough, Tony? " Tony about fainted 12th Grade - Snuck the name Sasuke Uchiha into every assignment - Turned Naruto Running into a thing at my school - Caused an existential crisis for my English teacher by suggesting that everything we experience could be fictional and we could be fictional characters unaware we don't exist , and that death is simply someone finishing our book , but there's no way to probe or disprove this theory because this reality (?) is all we know - secretly wrote cryptic riddles in my school books for the next student to find - The words ' Bankai', ' Hollow' and ' soul reaper' got banned in class because teachers thought it was a cult thing and none of us discouraged that thought

#high school

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thehalfworld · 7 years

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Fanfic MST: Forbiden Fruit: The Tempation of Edward Cullen, a Twilight fanfic [part 8]

And here we are at the end. I hope you’ve all been enjoying the ride, because it’s about to get a whole lot weirder in this, the final chapter.

Warnings this time around: a whole lot of drug use, some underage drinking, DUI but it’s okay because Tiaa is a vampire, bestiality, and an attempted sexual assault. Also did I mention drug use? There’s a lot of drug use.

Recap: Tiaa met a panda bear named Snoofles on her way to school (please don’t think too hard about this) and learned that she can now talk to animals, among other abilities. Thanks to a vague new ability of hers, she accidentally made her mean classmate Lauren get struck by lightning while they were in a verbal spat. Edward finally decided to leave Bella for Tiaa and the two celebrated by having sex in the middle of the school. Bella walked in on them and got upset.

Chapter 1

Previous chapter

hey guys sory its been so long since an update, i hav been so busy latley. sooooo..i had a fight with my old beta but i have a new 1 now an she is helpin me byut she is on vacaton this wk and next so i promise i will sort the spellin mistaks out wen i can!

Did she refuse to beta your fic after you stole her poster of Gerard Way?

Chapter 8 - the Kidnap

I sat alone in the changes rooms, i was all most naked and looked awsome with my exotic lithely hair falling down over my face like a curtan of soft yellow cream with bits of purple in it but I didnt care how beautifull or eqxisite I was any more.

Tiaa doesn’t care how beautiful she is, but she had to start the sentence off by reminding us all how beautiful she is. And that she looks awesome. And her hair is exotic.

Whatever that means.

Edward was gone. he had left to follow Bella to stop her from killin herself and i was SO mad.

Wait, are you mad Edward is attempting to prevent Bella from committing suicide?

how coud he leave me like that after sayin bella was a cow and he didnt like her no more?

That doesn’t mean he’s fine with letting her make attempts on her own life, Tiaa.

I was pissed! and the tears were falling down my face like a tepid summer rain of misery and woe.

I love this goddamn sentence.

So i went home and skipped school and sat in my room in my black corset and leather panties and i smoked some drugs and started to weep.

To be fair, this is a really solid stoner-goth aesthetic she has going.

…wait, hold up, leather panties?

Leather panties?

dave came in and made a big smiley face.

He’s in a really good mood for someone whose brother was murdered hours ago.

"hi tiaa! I didnt no you were home! how was school today?" (he didnt notice i was smokin drugs he thougt my cigarete of pot was a chapstick)

Okay, for the sake of argument, I’ll buy that Dave visually mistook a spliff for chapstick… but can he not smell that she’s smoking weed?

"it sucks!my life sucks and i want to DIE!" i scremed and my eyes glitered with beauty.

Love how Tiaa is suicidal but still needs to make sure we know how pretty she is at all times. Reminds me of the bit in “My Immortal” where Enoby was flirting while sobbing.

"u teenagers and ur problems, LOL!" he said laughing a lot, and i knew he thougt i was just some silly kid wineing about homework and dumb boys and stuff.

Well, replace “homework” with “getting raped by the relative of a caregiver, turning into a vampire, and accidentally seriously injuring a classmate” and Dave’s on the money.

he didnt no i had killed a man and lost the love off my life and had made lauren get hit by lighting and that all the kids at school thougt i was a freak becase my face and bodys were so diffrent from everyone elses.

Do I really need to tell this girl to stop humanizing her rapist? She killed him in self-defense! It was one hundred percent justified! C’mon, Tiaa, don’t be so hard on yourself.

Also, nobody cares about Lauren.

"dave your a good person but ur SO FUCKIN DUMB! YOU ASSHOLE!" i shouted at him and i threw my ashtray at his head WITHOUT TOUCHING IT (i could make stuff move when i was angry now...it was so weird! why did this have too happen to me!)

Well, yeah, that is weird, but I don’t get the woe-is-me attitude about it. Telekinesis is a really cool ability. Also, turns out Dave is literally so dumb that you can be an obvious nonhuman smoking weed in bed while screaming about wanting to die and he’ll take you for an ordinary teenage girl holding a tube of chapstick.

"haha, i guess your right" he laughed (he thougt i was joking, i wasnt spoiled or anythin)

…so did the ashtray miss?

"its so nice havin you hear tiana, your so pretty. i swear your even prettier than before!

I can’t help but feel that the amount Dave and Marie compliment Tiaa on her looks borders on inappropriate, considering she is sixteen and they are her foster parents.

and i think your boobs hav grown!"

Case in point.

"yeh i no they are like an E cup now" i said.

I guess it’s a good thing she’s a vampire, then, since I’m pretty sure vampires can’t get back problems.

Wait. Can vampires get high? Does being high feel different if you’re a vampire?

Dave smiled and patted me on the head and left.

That Dave!

I was so sick of bein treated like a kid and no one listenin to me that i got up and got dresed in a long black dress and took some pills (of drugs) and went out to the local nightclub which was called Pablo NIghtmare - it was a goth club were all the cool people went in forks.

Listen, I don’t know Washington State, but in my neck of the woods small towns don’t have goth nightclubs.

I love that she specified the pills were drugs, in case we thought they were sugar pills or something.

bella probably had never even heard of it, LOL!

If there is a goth nightclub in your small town, I guarantee you everyone has heard of it.

i met snoofles on the way and he came with me.

You’re taking the panda out clubbing?

we went to the club and got drinks and started dancing to the heavy metal music.

…I’m starting to get very confused about Snoofles. My initial impression was that he’s a regular panda bear, but Tiaa is able to communicate with him because she’s a vampire and can talk to all animals now. But I don’t think ordinary pandas go to clubs, get drinks, and dance to heavy metal music.

Although I’ve never met one, so I could be wrong.

ppl there stared at us cos i was so diffrerent looking and Snoofles was a panda, but we didnt care we were havin so much fun we were SO drunk and had taken a lot of drugs so my head was fuzzy like there was snow everywhere.

I adore the similes in this fic. No idea what Tiaa is on but I definitely know what the author means by feeling like there’s snow everywhere in your head.

"hi your called Tiana arent you? I am Jasper and I go to your school" said Jasper Cullen who was tall with blond curly hair like straw only soft and nice and not dry.

So… not like straw, then.

he was tall.

Yeah, you mentioned.

he was wearin a black pulover and red metal pointy shoes. (AN - haha, that descripton sounded beter in my head, OH WELL!)

No, it’s good, I dig it. Simple goth on top, bling on the bottom, may or may not be wearing pants? It’s a look.

"hey whatever" i said. "why arent you with that girl i all ways see you with?

"you mean my GF alice," he said and locked soddenly very sad and started to cry and bite down hard on his lips.

"what is wrong Jasper?" i said

"the problem is i dont love her like she loves me. i am gay, and thats wrong, and i feel so horible about it!"

Of course he’s gay. Look at his outfit! Look at those shoes! I can’t even see him for real and my gaydar is going wild.

"theres nothing bad about bein gay u no" i said.

"REALLY?" he sed, and looked chocked with his mouth open.

Good on Tiaa for being an ally. I love how Jasper reacts as though he’s never considered the possibility that his gayness might be alright. He’s a vampire too and has been alive for well over a century, so that’s a lot of internalized homophobia… but he’s also been around to witness the entire modern LGBT rights movement, so you’d think he might have gotten the “it’s okay to be gay” message before.

"yeah, its proper normal and Snoofles is gay and everything" i said and Snoofles waved and Jasper waves back.

If you just got a bad feeling about what might happen next, trust your fucking instincts.

he smiled and we all stared dancing together and Jasper gave us some of his drugs.

I really wanna know what they’ve been taking, because even though Tiaa isn’t human I feel like anyone who can get high should have to worry about drug interactions. Weed and alcohol is fine, but aside from that I have no idea what the hell Tiaa is on except that she described it as “pills” and a lot of drugs that come in pill form do not play nice with alcohol. She probably isn’t going to fry her liver or anything like that given that she’s essentially undead, but I doubt she’s immune to having a bad trip.

we had a relay good time and jasper met another gay guy called Vince and we all got in Snoofleses car at the end of the night and i drove around while the others all had sex in the back of the car.

A note: At this point in the story I quite literally had to stop the MST for a bit so I could pour myself a very stiff drink.

The panda has a car. The panda is having a threesome with a vampire and a human in the back of his car while another vampire drives it. This is treated as normal because the panda and his two human(oid) sexual partners happen to all be gay.

Like, I’d normally feel pretty weird about the “promiscuous gay” stereotype being invoked, but I’m way too busy feeling weird that the author thinks it’s normal for gay guys to want to screw a panda because the panda happens to be gay too. Also, keep in mind Snoofles can only talk to Tiaa — the dudes he’s having sex with can’t understand him. I’m gonna say a panda who behaves like a human and owns a car is probably capable of consenting, but I still feel mighty weird about the idea that two dudes who perceive Snoofles as an ordinary, non-talking panda would want to have a threesome with him.

I guess the promiscuity aspect isn’t even bad considering how Tiaa and Edward have been acting with each other throughout the fic. The bestiality, though, I have trouble overlooking.

(i was drunk but cos i was a vampire it was ok to drive i had beter reflex than humans!)

Sure, but do you even know how to drive? In most states, it’s not legal to get a learner’s permit until you’re Tiaa’s age, so we’re not talking “experienced driver with superhuman reflexes,” we’re talking “superhuman reflexes, but on somebody who quite possibly has never sat in the driver’s seat of a car before.”

but soddenly somethin jumped into the road infront of us and i had to stop the car and get out. there was a man standin in the middle of the road he was tall and mussely and had black hair like the black feathers of a raven in the black darkness.

But was his black hair like the black feathers of a black raven in the black darkness? I just want to be clear on the color.

he was good looking but he looked so angry i got out my samurai sword (i often have it with me!) but somone jammed up behind me and tore it from me, there were like ten people all grabbing my body in the darkness and they put a thing over my face so i coudnt see and they tied me up!

Oh, of course, her samurai sword. Yep. Been with her the whole time.

Jasper Snoofles and Vince were too busy doing gay sex on each other to notice, i cud hear them grunting and humping and having orgasms on each other - it was so cute but now was SO not the time!

She’s being attacked by a group of ten or more people, who have overpowered her, restrained her, and blindfolded her, in the middle of the road. Three people (well, a person, a vampire, and a panda) are present and they don’t notice this happening at all.

Like… I know they’re all intoxicated and, uh, otherwise occupied at the moment, but did they not at least pause to notice Tiaa slamming on the brakes to avoid colliding with a stranger in the road?

The men who had caught me took me away and somethin hit me over the head and i was unconshous.

when i awoken i found myself in a small dark room and the tall mussel man was in front of me. i was strip down to my underwear and i was chained to a chair with some metal chains and i coudnt move.

Tiaa has superhuman strength and reflexes. She has telekinetic abilities. She can affect objects and people by touching them.

Yet she can’t get out of being chained to a chair?

I call BS.

"WHO ARE YOU YOU WANKY PERV!" i shoyted.

She sounds like Wheatley from “ITS MY LIFE!” now.

"I AM JACOB...THE WEREWOLF KING!" he yelled with his eyes rolling around in his face - he looked so mad and CRAZY!

Jacob’s a big dude who can turn into a wolf, but he’s also about fifteen and just learning about the whole werewolf thing, so I doubt he’d be “king” of anything. Also Tiaa could take him easy.

"NOOOOOOO!" I scremed and i try to broke myself free but i was under so many heavy chains so i looked into his wagging face insted.

I don’t know why she reacted so negatively to Jacob’s response. There is a longstanding vampire/werewolf feud in the Twilight universe, but Tiaa is very newly turned and shouldn’t know about any of that yet. Learning your kidnapper is a werewolf sucks, but if you’re already a vampire you’ve got an edge too.

"Watt do u want from me? why am i here?" i say and i started to cry.

"YOU MUST BE PUNISHED FOR WHAT YOU DID TO BELLA SWAN!" he shreeked and the drool was sloapping down his face just like rain only thick and foam-like.

So… not like rain, then.

"YOU ARE A HALF-BREAD!

I’ve got to change this blog’s name right away. I don’t know what I was thinking naming it “The Half-World” when I could have named it “The Half-Bread.”

Also, hold up — what did Tiaa do to Bella? Is this just about “stealing” Edward? Jacob and Edward aren’t exactly buddy-buddy, and if Bella’s single Jacob has a chance with her, so if anything I think he owes Tiaa a thank-you.

YOU SHOUD NEVER HAVE BEEN BORNE! YOUR FATHER WAS A VAMPIRE AND YOUR MOM WAS A WHITCH! ITS WEIRD AND WRONG AND NOW YOUVE BROKEN BELLAS HEART! HALF-BREAD! HALF-BREAD! HALF-BREAD!"

Well, this really does speak for itself.

This dude was insane, he was so angery he was jumpin up and down.

Sounds like my second-grade teacher. She was the daughter of a well-known Republican senator and she had to resign after she tied a kid to a chair with a jump rope. True story.

But something he said had caugt my attention .

Good job on the punctuation.

"What do u mean my mom was a whitch?" I said.

What do you think he meant, genius?

"MY FATHER USED TO NO HER! SHE LIVED HERE IN LA PUSH AND SHE WAS A WHITCH! SHE COUD MAKE FIRE COME FROM NOWERE AND CONTROLL THE WETHER AND TALK TO ANIMALS AND LOADS OF OTHER STUFF! SHE WAS A FREAK LIKE U!"

I guess this does explain Tiaa’s extra powers, but, I have to say, I don’t think Jacob gets to criticize anyone else for being freaky when he can turn into a wolf.

Of corse! It all made sense now!

It didn’t all make sense. There’s still an interspecies gay threesome that needs explaining.

I was so shocked I fainted,

and also got my periods and commas mixed up,

When i woke up Jacob was in front of me and he was NAKED! He was smilling in a proper creepy way and looked totaly weird like a greasy frog thing and his male genital item was not nice like edwards it was like a horible wet mushroom.

Honest to god I love these similes.

he stroked my knee with it and i gapsed. whatt was he going to do to me!

I think I have an idea, actually.

but sudenly before he coud come any closer the door of the room we were in burst open!

IT WAS EWDARD!

Here to save the day! And to end the fic, because this is it for “Forbiden Fruit”: BeckyMac666 left us all on a cliffhanger, so we’ll never know what happens.

I do genuinely love this fanfic. I love how it’s written, I love the similes, I love the purple prose and the melodramatic tone, and I love my girl Tiaa. It’s a truly fantastic badfic, and I’m happy I got to introduce others to it, too.

#forbidenfruit.mst #fandom:twilight #halfworld.mst

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summerscribbler · 7 years

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Regarding that Musical Recap

So, much like many of you, after Recap-Gate I had a lot of feelings.

Pain then anger then retweet, retweet, retweet, dear god I need to go out into the real world and get off twitter!

I’m not even a hardcore SuperCorp shipper. I ship it but I don’t go crazy over it. I like a lot of ships on the show and I actually did think that, of nearly all of my ships, that Supercorp had the best chance of becoming canon rather than fanon.

Then Jeremy started singing.

Let’s get this first part out of the way. That song was a dick move. The passion he used when crushing the fandom was a dick move. Melissa’s glee while yelling along was a dick move. Saying he debunked the ship was a dick move. Calling that statement brave was yet another dick move.

I’ve seen a lot of these dick moves in television over the years, with social media making it so much easier for social missteps to occur. About a week ago I watched the show runner for Wynonna Earp be completely rude to a fan who was simply trying to compliment her. She blocked said fan and then other fans who tried to help her out. Wynonna Earp lives and breathes on the tenacious dedication of its fan base. These people worked HARD to get a third season out of that show and they succeeded. It seems to me that it would be important to be kind to the people that made that happen but I do believe that people working in the industry have started to let the bad apples color their perception of the bunch. Leaving them with this contentious fan dynamic that often leads to really terrible treatment at times.

And let’s not even get into the atrocity that is Once Upon a Time; the quintessential example of queerbaiting and then fan demeaning.

Today’s climate seems to be a cyclical downpour of pandering and pounding from the people who make lots of money off the people that keep them making lots of money. Fans become rabid about their ship and annoy show runners, writers and actors. Show runners, writers and actors have a bigger voice and use it to toss barbs at fans. Hate, hate, hate. Apology, apology, apology. New show comes around and we all line up for the merry-go-round again.

I feel like a few things need to happen here:

1.Know the power of your presence and how to use it: Melissa said something extremely interesting while she also said something extremely offensive. She called Jeremy brave for destroying SuperCorp. Now, she could mean because she knew the repercussions on social media would be severe but I think it probably goes deeper than that. SuperCorp is a huge chunk of the Supergirl fan base. If they no longer have any reason to hold onto that ship then they are only going to stay if a) They ship Sanvers or b) They actually like the direction the show is headed. Most self-respecting women do not like watching a once powerful symbol of hope turn into a another white dude’s girlfriend. Don’t get me wrong. I think Mon-El is great for comic relief but to be Kara’s ‘whole world’? I weep for the Supergirl who used to inspire me. The point is, Jeremy’s statement was a bold, not brave, move because if he sends the Supercorp camp packing, ratings will take a downward turn when they’re already not looking so hot. If you’re a Supercorp shipper, you now have a great deal of power. Show them who they just hurt. Not only with your tweets but with your viewership. Download the show. Don’t watch live. Don’t support trends. Let them feel the pain of your loss so that, perhaps, demeaning your ship goes from ‘brave’ to ‘economically insane’.

2. Actually do step 1. Seriously, guys, Once Upon a Time survived and continuously spit in the face of one of its largest audiences because everyone continued to watch live or on a measurable media source. Respect yourself enough to take your own power back. STOP GIVING THEM YOUR RATINGS!

3. Read steps 1 and 2 again for good measure because I know you and you’re still probably on the fence.

4.Do not escalate to personal attacks. You will not be taken seriously if you stoop to that level. I saw quite a few attacks on Melissa that went above and beyond over the line yesterday. No, Supergirl would not punch Melissa. Supergirl would go hug her gay sister and the bridal carry Lena from a falling building. And, no matter how bad Melissa made you feel, she did not attack your personal history nor did she threaten you with violence. Make your voices powerful and meaningful, not loud and vitriolic.

5. Support shows that do things right. Every show has something problematic about it but there are some that do far better than others. Shonda Rhimes knocks diversity out of the park constantly. Orphan Black has shown massive support toward the LGBTQ community for years.

6. Be the change you want to see in the world and yada, yada, yada. I know it’s corny but if you turned the passion you have for fandom into something you have the ability to create then YOU set the tone for the future. Write, act, produce, direct, and draw those beautiful queer characters you always wanted to see and share them with people who will appreciate them. Yes, we need to fight for diverse representation but we also need to spend some of that energy on creating it for ourselves because we obviously cannot trust the powers that be to do so and do so right.

Fight for who you are and what you want with dignity and, hopefully one day, some cis, white dude will think twice before trying to rain on your big, beautiful gay parade.

#Supergirl #SuperCorp

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thedegenerateasexual · 7 years

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top 10 teen wolf episodes as rated by me i guess

IN the order from most to least favorite, and i did not include any 6B ones because it isn’t fair for me to use those when the season isn’t finished yet. (EDIT: season is now finished and while none of the 6B episodes made the ranking i did adjust the honorable mentions accordingly.) this is long & i had fun making it

3.19 Letharia Vulpina: ok ok so just like Everyone Knew I Would i did pick this one because of all the prime derek/chris material—that all-important moment where they had their claws and gun trained on each other, being handcuffed to a bench together, derek saving chris’s life despite insisting he wasn’t gonna—BUT there’s literally not a single second of this episode i don’t love. we open with deaton being a total badass and scaring the shit out of some yakuza dudes, then KIRA gets to be a badass, and then there’s a small scott/allison/isaac moment when he’s all laid up (which was my ot3 for a little while in 3A…don’t judge), allison gets to threaten peter with a stun baton on her girlfriend lydia’s behalf, and that doesn’t even BEGIN to get into the absolute delight it is to watch everyone running around trying to deal with all the chaos the notgitsune is causing (we even got to see coach get shot, which was actually pretty funny??). between all of that and the plot twist at the end (that we all saw coming…but hey) that it was really the nogitsune pretending to be stiles all along (and the very…gay…thing going on with him and scott), it’s literally like, the perfect episode. there was even a rain battle at the end i fucking love rainy scenes. PEAK television.

4.12 Smoke & Mirrors: my two favorite characters on the dumb werewolf show are derek hale & scott mccall and this episode is like a great big flashing sign that says “LOOK AT HOW AWESOME DEREK IS AND LOOK AT HOW AWESOME SCOTT IS!!!” because scott finally gets to KICK PETER’S ASS and comes back from something he shouldn’t be able to come back from because he’s SCOTT MCCALL, TRUE ALPHA, and how can we forget my son derek finally achieving the full shift and giving that big old “FUCK YOU” to kate argent. if that wasn’t enough, my third favorite character chris argent gets the second-closest he’s ever come to weeping in this entire series when confronting the sister he can’t kill at the end. also kate is in this episode and she’s the best villain i love her presence onscreen. also peak television.

1.12 Code-Breaker: i love s1 SO FUCKING MUCH bc it was so tightly plotted - it’s like back to the future and holes, it’s one of those things where every line serves a purpose and there’s no spare bits, and tw’s plot becomes such a mess later that it’s honestly really amazing. so code breaker is my favorite one because all the plot stuff comes together really well, and it’s just like well-done overall, there’s that sick backwards shot of allison, chris’s Angst when he realizes his sister is a serial killer, scott trying Really Really Hard and derek being Really Really Done (why don’t they have more scenes together…), stiles and peter cracking me up with the laptop password gag, like…there’s literally no part of this ep that isn’t a delight (also again kate is in it i love kate as a villain). it’s wonderful 10/10

3.14 More Bad Than Good: i had a real hard time with this one vs. the one immediately before it, the first one of 3B, but i love both bc i love watching scott stiles and allison absolutely losing their shit. in the end i like this one better bc 1. you get to watch them beat it and 2. they finally find and rescue malia and i FUCKING LOVE malia, my own daughter, also the scene where she reunites with her dad makes me misty every time. bonus content: watching araya hack off peter’s finger :D :D :D AND this is the first time derek gets to make heart-eyes at braeden. i’m so happy whenever he’s happy!!!

6.05 Radio Silence: this episode is everything i love about 6A all wrapped up in a nice neat lil package. i love 6A bc it totally fucking surprised me by making me like things i did not think i’d like, the biggest being stiles/lydia. and like…this season fuckin SOLD me on it, the way she fights tooth and nail to get him back and the way he’s so patiently waited for her reminds me 2much of claire & ben from @cambionverse and the beginning of me being sold was this ep, when they had the wall between them, and when they finally talked on the radio. and this episode even made peter hale interesting for 30 entire seconds which i thought was impossible—it was cool that he did One Genuinely Selfless Thing by going through the portal to save malia, and later when malia and scott had to take his pain to get at stiles’ keys you could almost imagine for a second he got to pretend someone actually DID care about him, that’s his reward for doing a single selfless thing. it was also stellar to see stiles (and the jeep!!!) again and see him working the problem from the other side it was like getting real sam back after half a season of soulless sam in spn s6 DO NOT call me out for referencing this show

4.05 I.E.D.: go look at these gifsets and read the tags. now come back. …okay okay aside from, That, which i won’t repeat as to avoid two paragraphs of capslock, derek also smiles in this episode. even scott is alarmed by it. HE’S HAPPY i’m happy he’s happy!!!!! i’m happy he loves scott!! i’m happy he spends half the episode trading long lingering looks with his future boyfriend!!!! but if that wasn’t enough this episode KEEPS ON GIVING because at the very end the calaveras show up and bully chris into saying the original code, and forgetting his daughter’s, which is deeply relevant to all my headcanons about the code lowkey being like indoctrination (watch that shit again it’s fucking wild…), and also it’s one of the only times in the series where he looks genuinely freaked out and i love watching his Turmoil™

6.10 Riders on the Storm: this is also everything i love about 6A in one ep, just like, less concentrated, bc there’s also the nazi werewolf (tho even PETER HALE getting judgy @ the nazi was truly a highlight). its got all the Big Damn Reunions, its got STYDIA, its got peter actually being slightly interesting, its got scott mccall: badass. its actually also got lydia martin: badass, which like…About Damn Time. it’s even got chris argent: badass, and it’s also got chris argent: badass smooching on a beautiful lady w/ his hands in her hair!!!! (her: that was so hot! me: GIRL ME TOO) also they thought this was the last stiles ep ever so his goodbyes to everyone were like really sweet & made me emo af

3.22 De-Void: so obviously i love this one because derek’s line when he was under thrall about “you’re NOT my ally you’re a HUNTER” got me into the dumb rarepair i wrote like 60k for so far but also i do genuinely deeply love the sequence where they exorcise the notgitsune from inside stiles’ head—lydia facing her fears in the ruined prom dress is such amazing imagery + im gay for the scott/stiles reunion. bonus content includes chris & allison interaction which breaks my heart (he’s so proud of her!!) and the tense kickass scene in the loft in the opening where the notgitsune (SCARY MOTHERFUCKER) is trying to goad chris into shooting it. i don’t love ALL of this ep bc it has so much thumb twins (& from here down there are no more perfect ones…sad) but i love MOST of it and the parts i do love are fantastic. so. i’ll deal w/ thumb twins

3.06 Motel California: look i know this episode should disturb the fuck out of me bc 1. derek and jennifer bang & in my eyes that isn’t a consensual encounter and 2. all the creepy ass suicides but like…honestly there is something so soothing about motels to me, i’ll put this one on to just chill out anyday. like it is delightfully creepy and i love all the meat to everyone getting hit with their baggage (uh…except the thumb twins), but mostly it’s the #mood i love. i actually even like the derek scenes before the sex starts because he is So Wounded and So Sad (“everyone around me gets hurt” BYE) and they rarely let him actually emote at all so it’s very refreshing

2.03 Ice Pick: this was like…such a perfect & amazing introduction to the new betas like if the new ppl in s4 and beyond had gotten this kind of good introduction (and hadn’t been killed off so quickly…) i would love them about 10x more. it’s got that nice s2 vibe that most ppl are into and i still love erica & boyd w/ all my heart!!! (DONT really love how creepy derek was w/ erica but we’ll blame it on being the alpha.) i also love how fucked up the scene with allison tied to the chair was & the fucking fight between derek’s pack and scott at the end…like scott gets to win a 2-on-1 fight and then derek gets to be mr. cool alpha dude and kick his ass. i LOVE THOSE FIGHT SCENES and bc of this episode “iron” is my derek theme song. so.

HONORABLE MENTIONS aka these were on the original list but didn’t make the cut:

1.11 Formality (aaalllll of derek’s ugly backstory this was when i knew i loved him)

2.10 Fury (the first ep i ever watched live, will always be fond of it for that reason even tho i don’t give 2 shits about matt)

2.11 Battlefield (the theme of doing things bc of the power of love will always get me, it was also the only teen wolf episode i ever made gifs of, back when i knew how to make gifs)

3.12 Lunar Ellipse (for scott becoming a true alpha for REAL + derek’s big ol’ well-deserved fuck-you to jennifer, i didn’t love 3A but this was such prime derek & scott material)

3.13 Anchors (like i said: watching stiles, scott, and allison all COMPLETELY lose their shit, also did you know the anchor allison chose in this ep ws her new code? Interesting)

3.24 The Divine Move (listen...you can laugh at the cheesy sfx ALL you want but when i watched kate argent come back from the dead to menace derek hale like his own worst nightmare come to life LIVE with mine own two eyes i jumped out of my seat and YELLED like everything about that moment was absolutely PERFECT and very few things are ever gonna top it)

4.08 Time of Death (derek learning to use a gun and then getting it on with braeden…bye)

4.11 A Promise to the Dead (not only chris unsticking himself from the wall for allison and scott’s sake but also derek and braeden walking around his loft half-naked in the rain...nice)

5.05 A Novel Approach (the stiles and donovan altercation…the first 15m where he acts with his face without saying a word…enough said)

5.18 The Maid of Gévaudan (i'm bitter about the flashback because i want ALLISON but it was a nice origin story + scott fighting the beast all on his own to save that library full of kids was one of the only truly amazing moments of 5B)

6.08 Blitzkrieg (the sheriff rebuilding stiles’ room and saying goodbye to claudia makes me really for real cry but there’s so much nazi bullshit that i couldn’t justify having the episode as a whole being one of my favs)

6.13 After Images (chris argent absolutely losing his shit the entire ep, fucking love it)

6.19 Broken Glass (derek hale's comeback and he got to spend all of his screentime with chris argent! i seriously considered poking this into the #10 spot but ultimately the sideplot i hated with malia and scott had so much more screentime i can't use it - i can't list an episode i'm always skipping parts of!)

#personal #teen wolf #im scheduling this to go up like not in the middle of the night #so im not like. actly here #dargent #chris argent #derek hale #kate argent #jennifer blake #braeden #draeden #melissa mccall #mcargent #scott mccall #about teen wolf

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admittedlynotspartacus · 7 years

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2017 Best Picture Nominees Ranked

This year in film, Colin Farrell ate a bunch of Big Macs for The Lobster and then slimmed out for Fantastic Beasts, only to be replaced at the end by Johnny Depp; Natalie Portman cried in close-up for two hours; Patrick Stewart played the year's second scariest white supremacist; and Paul Dano rode a flatulent Daniel Radcliffe across the sea. Of course, none of these are nominated for Best Picture, because the Academy still consists of a bunch of old white guys who were alive during the Golden Age of Hollywood musicals, yet still gifted La La Land more nominations than Singin' in the Rain, An American in Paris, and The Umbrellas of Cherbourg COMBINED. However, moving on... here are the 9 films nominated for Best Picture ranked in my oh-so-humble opinion from "You can probably skip this" to "Run out and see this immediately."

9. HACKSAW RIDGE

Director: Mel Gibson Starring: Andrew Garfield, Vince Vaughn & Hugo Weaving The Plot: Mel Gibson uses the inspirational story of a religious man who refuses to carry a weapon into battle as an excuse to make the most violent movie since Passion of the Christ. Thoughts: Gibson executes the battle scenes effectively, and Andrew Garfield turns in a good-but-not-great performance, but there's no real maturation as a director here. He paints with broad colors a story that could've had tremendous power had there been more nuance. There was more to explore with this character's relationship to God, but it's largely eschewed for Old Hollywood beats and brouhaha. Overall, a fairly mediocre war movie, but this time with Jesus. Nominations: 6 (including Picture, Director, and Actor) Rotten Tomatoes Score: 86%

8. LA LA LAND

Director: Damien Chazelle Starring: Emma Stone & Ryan Gosling The Plot: Emma Stone and Ryan Gosling are adorable, talented, and wonderful and you love them... right? Thoughts: The entire gimmick of this Hollywood throwback musical is that it is a Hollywood throwback musical. It's in CinemaScope, everything looks Technicolor, and most of the numbers are filmed head-to-toe in one shot. It's technically proficient work by a clearly talented filmmaker, yet there is so little joy (and talent for singing and dancing) on display in the musical moments that it's hard to even understand the point. Ryan Gosling's too-cool-for-school hoofing and Emma Stone's whispery vocals are nothing compared to Gene and Debbie, Astaire and Rodgers, or even Judy and Mickey. And because there are so few songs, most of the film is occupied by textbook rom-com beats (however charmingly acted). See it for the instrumental score, which is on full display in the film's final ten minutes. Nominations: 14 (including Picture, Director, Actor, Actress, and Original Screenplay) Rotten Tomatoes Score: 93%

7. FENCES

Director: Denzel Washington Starring: Denzel Washington & Viola Davis The Plot: Dude says he's gonna build a fence, but mostly just acts like a shithead. Thoughts: Your enjoyment of this film is going to be largely based on how you handle the "stagey" factor. Denzel has effectively shot the classic play, rarely opening it up beyond the backyard set. In this way, it bears resemblance to the films of Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf or Glengarry Glen Ross, but he lacks the directorial panache of Nichols and Foley, so the scenes often operate all on the same level with little dynamic change. For me, this got exhausting for 2 and a half hours, and the text (which remains beautiful poetry by the late great August Wilson) could've used trims, particularly when we see in Denzel's face the suffering of Troy so clearly that he doesn't need to talk about it much. Such is the power of the close-up, and even though it captures two phenomenal screen performances by Denzel and Viola, it ultimately robs the play of the power it would yield were we just watching them do it onstage. Nominations: 4 (Picture, Actor, Supporting Actress & Adapted Screenplay) Rotten Tomatoes Score: 94%

6. LION

Director: Garth Davis Starring: Dev Patel, Sunny Pawar & Nicole Kidman The Plot: Young boy separated from his mother has no interest in finding her until he becomes rugged Dev Patel, is mildly insulted at a party, and has access to Google Earth. Thoughts: The first hour of Lion is among the most beautifully shot pieces of cinema this year. Sunny Pawar is a magnetic protagonist, and Garth Davis and cinematographer Greig Fraser find a visual language for the story of a young boy who is separated from his family and tossed into an overwhelming world that is both epically Dickensian and visceral. It's unfortunate that the moment he grows up into Dev Patel (in a very game performance), much of the film's engagement is lost and we are subjected to long scenes of Patel staring at a computer screen that oftentimes come across as advertisements for Google Earth. Still, if you don't weep like a baby at the ending, I doubt you have a soul. Nominations: 6 (including Picture, Supporting Actor, Supporting Actress & Adapted Screenplay) Rotten Tomatoes Score: 86%

5. HIDDEN FIGURES

Director: Theodore Melfi Starring: Taraji P. Henson, Octavia Spencer, Janelle Monae & Kevin Costner The Plot: Nasty women get shit done. Thoughts: The most conventional of the Best Picture nominees gets its power from two key elements - that it's a story we don't really know, and that it's about three black women. It's a refreshingly old-fashioned American film about unlikely heroes that tells the familiar story of the space race from a surprising angle. And so, through familiar beats, the film is able to make an epic story personal, while also hitting the nerve of a country currently knee-deep in issues of race relations. Nominations: 3 (Picture, Supporting Actress & Adapted Screenplay) Rotten Tomatoes Score: 92%

4. HELL OR HIGH WATER

Director: David Mackenzie Starring: Chris Pine, Ben Foster & Jeff Bridges The Plot: Proof that everyone is getting screwed over by banks, including bank robbers. Thoughts: A tense chase movie set against the backdrop of an economically-paralyzed Texas, David Mackenzie’s “Western” transcends our 21st century understanding of the genre (loud gunfights, chases, and anachronistic music) without tipping its hat too hard to the classics. Taylor Sheridan’s screenplay is dynamite, featuring three principal characters brimming with emotion and trading dialogue that feels both true to life and wonderfully cinematic. It’s these characters and their dualities that give the film its epic scope. And this is to say nothing of the final sequence, which finds a power in silence of which most films only dream. In a summer full of duds, this was the one to see. Nominations: 4 (including Picture, Supporting Actor & Original Screenplay) Rotten Tomatoes Score: 98%

3. ARRIVAL

Director: Denis Villeneuve Starring: Amy Adams The Plot: In which Amy Adams can talk to aliens, but still can't win an Oscar. Thoughts: Denis Villeneuve, of Sicario and Prisoners note, is one of the best contemporary filmmakers at creating a feeling of dread and anxiety. The opening sequences of his latest (shot beautifully by cinematographer Bradford Young) play with a kind of hypnotic, slow-burn tension that’s seldom seen in movies these days, let alone a big blockbuster like this one. Anchoring it all is Amy Adams, proving once again to be one of our greatest actresses. Her interactions with the truly alien-looking aliens, through a rectangular glass window on the other side of a room filled with white haze, are the centerpieces of a film which flirts with timely notions of global unity and boasts a few twists and turns as well. When it starts dealing out reveals, it becomes less and less effective, but the overall vision and feel of the film, grounded by Adams’ performance, make it something to behold. Nominations: 8 (including Picture, Director & Adapted Screenplay) Rotten Tomatoes Score: 94%

2. MANCHESTER BY THE SEA

Director: Kenneth Lonergan Starring: Casey Affleck, Lucas Hedges & Michelle Williams The Plot: Casey Affleck could learn some chill from his ginger nephew. Thoughts: The latest in the line of the “Boston grief drama” is among the most depressing things you’ll see this year. It’s also one of the funniest. Kenneth Lonergan has always walked the line of humor and heartache with painstaking accuracy, but never as well as he does in this masterful work. His picture of life is one where a never-ending litany of stupidities is ever present. Just because you’re dealing with the death of a loved one doesn’t mean you stop getting bad cell reception, stubbing your toe, or forgetting where you parked the car. It’s a tricky balancing act, one that major Hollywood movies eschew altogether, presumably because they don’t trust an audience to be able to parcel out what’s funny and what’s tragic. But in Manchester, the two emotions trade off, sometimes coinciding, to remarkable effect. And nowhere is this more embodied than in a grade-A performance by Casey Affleck; it’s one of those performances that is so perfectly realized you really feel like you know the guy; you understand the whirlwind of grief and anger that exists within him and how he’s masked it with a detached veneer. The acting overall is tremendous; Lucas Hedges is phenomenal in a breakout performance, and Michelle Williams makes the most of her limited screen-time. Lonergan and co. so fully commit to this truthful vision of a world wherein nobody gets an easy pass; sometimes you can beat it, and sometimes you just can’t. Nominations: 6 (Picture, Director, Actor, Supporting Actor, Supporting Actress & Original Screenplay) Rotten Tomatoes Score: 96%

1. MOONLIGHT

Director: Barry Jenkins Starring: Trevante Rhodes, Andre Holland, Janelle Monae, Ashton Sanders, Jharrel Jerome, Naomie Harris, Mahershala Ali The Plot: It's black gay Boyhood. Thoughts: It is absolutely baffling as to how this movie, based on a Tarell Alvin McCraney play, featuring not a single white actor, and focusing on the maturation of a gay protagonist, ever got made. But that’s not even the tip of the iceberg of the miracle that is Moonlight. It’s one of those movies that is so utterly transporting, so richly detailed, and so very very real that even though one knows painstaking work went into it, it feels as though it emerged fully-realized from a collective consciousness and fell into our laps right when we needed it most. The film begins in the familiar territory of hip-hop mythology - there’s a role model drug dealer and junkie mom, for instance - and yet it soon becomes clear we are being presented with the cliches and tropes of this type of film to shatter them and ultimately come back around to say, “Look at these people. They’re human. They’ve always been and always will.” There is beauty in nearly every moment, from the stunning cinematography (the scene in the water… the cooking) to the subtle score, to its performances (Alex Hibbert’s, Ashton Sanders’, and Trevante Rhodes’ collective turn as Chiron is staggering, and Naomie Harris and Mahershala Ali will surely be recognized come Oscar time). It’s all in service of a singular vision - one that isn’t easy to pin down or put into words, but one that will surely stay with me for a long, long time.

But alas...

#oscars #oscars2017 #moonlight #lalaland #manchesterbythesea #hiddenfigures #hellorhighwater #hacksawridge #arrival #fences #damienchazelle #ryangosling #emmastone #barryjenkins #amyadams #academyawards

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ylla · 7 years

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Friday Night Gurus - Chapter 4

Series: JJBA Ships: josuyasu, koichi/yukako (others will eventually happen too, but im tagging as i go) Tags: celebrity au, modern au, pining, recreational drug use (smoking that wacky tabaccy), lots of talking and cuddles in this one, lads Rating: E

AO3 link

HAHA, SO MY COMPUTER ATE THIS CHAPTER AND WHAT I HAD FOR TMBTP, SO, I HAD TO RESTART FROM SCRATCH. i rewrote this garbage dump from memory, and here we are. TMBTP is forthcoming once i stop weeping. may the powers that be take pity on this elderly woman (ed. note – author is only 24).

shoutout to TheSmuttiestPrincess and their fic Talk To Me That Way I Like for introducing me to praise kink!okuyasu, which is something i never knew i needed until i read it.

as always, comment the fic, kudos the fic, and bookmark the fic to see more of the same fic content.

Josuke woke up the next morning feeling like someone had cracked him across the face with a baseball bat. Fucking storms causing pressure headaches; he’d meet Mother Nature in the pit if she was a real person. He would have gotten up to get medicine if he hadn’t been trapped in the arms of a particularly buff octopus. Okuyasu was spooning him, legs and arms firmly wrapped around Josuke to prevent him from escaping (not that Okuyasu had to worry about that to begin with). Josuke could feel Oku’s slow, even breathing on his neck and it was giving him goosebumps. It felt like it was too early to exist. “What fuckin’ time is it,” he muttered to himself. Blindly, Josuke groped for his phone, but couldn’t seem to find it. “S'about 8:30.” Josuke didn’t hear Okuyasu speak so much as he felt him. “You awake?” Josuke whispered. “Mmh.” Josuke made to turn over, but Okuyasu held him in place. “Lemme roll over.” “I got morning breath,” Oku’s voice was slurred with sleep, voice rougher than usual. “I don’t care, dude. I do too.” Josuke tried rolling over again, but Okuyasu steadfastly held him in place. A power struggle ensued; Josuke valiantly did his best to break free, but Okuyasu had both the upper hand and strength to keep him in place. He felt Oku’s chest shaking with laughter, quiet chuckles in his ear. “I swear to God,” he huffed after a few fruitless minutes of wrestling, resigning himself to Little Spoon status, “I’m firing Polnareff.” That just made Okuyasu chuckle even harder, “No you won’t, that’d break his croissant-lovin’ heart.” He shifted closer to Josuke, and put his face into the junction where his neck met his shoulder. “Hey, uh, is it okay if I…?” Okuyasu faltered, nervous.

“You can kiss me, goofball. We’re dating, remember?”

Josuke could feel Okuyasu face flush before he zealously trailed kisses from Josuke’s shoulder, up his neck, to his corner of his jaw, settling on his earlobe which he nibbled on slightly. It sent shockwaves through his body, and Josuke couldn’t help but hiss.

Okuyasu backed off, “Oh shit, sorry—“

“No no don’t be,” Josuke rubbed the arm that held onto him, “It’s just been like, a long time since I’ve done anything like this. And, uh,” Josuke cleared his throat, “that felt really good, s-so, you know.” It was his turn to flush, and his face was scarlet.

“I just don’t wanna fuck this up. I really like you,” Okuyasu’s voice was small.

“You ain’t gonna fuck this up, I promise. Unless you wanna like, put something fucked up in my ass, like a centipede—“

“EW!” Okuyasu sounded horrified, “That’s disgusting. You just killed my boner, Higashikata.”

He had killed his own one man salute too, but that had been the plan. “Is that why you didn’t want me to roll over?” Josuke asked slyly.

“Uhm. Maybe?” Josuke went to turn towards him, but Okuyasu was obstinate. “I also don’t wanna smell ya mornin’ breath! It’s hot like thunder.”

“Oh my god, you stubborn mule,” Josuke tried to kick him, but Oku just wrapped his legs around Josuke’s tighter. “If we get up and brush our teeth, can we like, face each other?”

“Hm. Hm. I guess.” Okuyasu finally relinquished his iron-clad grip. Josuke sprang up, free to piss and scrub his nasty breath away.

Josuke was rinsing his mouth out when Okuyasu trudged in after him. “About time, lazy ass—“ He raised his head to get a good look at his boyfriend and would have spewed water everywhere if he hadn’t spit it out moments before, “God almighty, Oku, you look terrible.”

Okuyasu looked like he had been rode hard and put up wet. Cheek still bruised from Keicho’s left hook, eyes bloodshot, saddled with bags underneath them, skin looking a little colorless, “I feel terrible. This always happens if I’m out in the rain for too long.”

Josuke moved to let him brush his teeth before questioning him further. When Okuyasu finished, Josuke passed him a towel to wipe his mouth off, “How long were you out there?”

“Dunno. An hour? Two hours?”

“What the fuck, why didn’t you just call me??”

Okuyasu threw his hands up, “I did! I called like, at least 30 times! Your phone was dead or somethin’.”

“Oh shit,” Josuke completely forgot, “I turned it off before passing out on the couch.” He cringed, “Sorry.”

“S’fine,” Okuyasu rubbed one of his eyes, “I was close to just bustin’ a window and comin’ in that way.”

Josuke snorted, “Yeah that would’ve been great. Pissing myself when I wake up to a big ass, sopping wet burglar looming over me. Real romantic.”

“Fuck you dude, I was worried.”

“Worried?” Josuke arched an eyebrow, “Why were you worried?”

Okuyasu shifted from one foot to the other, “You weren’t answerin’, and I knew you were probably upset. I just—You know—“ he gestured vaguely, “jus’ wanted to make sure you were okay.”

That made Josuke’s heart turn over, “Aww, you big sweetie.”

Being called a sweetie made Okuyasu roll his eyes, unable to belie the blush on his face, “Shut up.” He threw the towel back down on the sink and rubbed the back of his neck, “So uh, can I kiss you?”

“You don’t gotta keep asking me that.”

Okuyasu fidgeted, “Sorry. I’m nervous that I’m gonna accidentally make ya uncomfortable, so I feel better when I ask.”

Josuke stepped close to him, placing a hand on his cheek, “You won’t make me uncomfortable. If ya ever did, I’d tell ya.” He stroked his thumb over Oku’s poor, bruised face, “But if it’ll make you feel better, then ask away.”

“Okay.” With that, Okuyasu gave him a kiss on the lips. It was sweet and soft, and it made Josuke’s chest soar. Oku hesitantly wrapped his arms around Josuke’s neck, hands in his hair; Josuke took that as a sign to pull his hips flush against his own and slide his tongue into Okuyasu’s mouth. His actions elicited a deep groan from his boyfriend, who awarded him by gently backing Josuke against the wall. It went from chaste and slow to messy and urgent in almost an instant.

“Fuck,” Josuke breathed as Oku pulled away to put teeth against his neck. When Okuyasu stopped momentarily, Josuke wove his fingers through his hair, “Leave marks.” Oku did as instructed; Josuke couldn’t help but grind his rising erection against Oku. “You’re too good at this,” he moaned, arching his back. That seemed to trigger something in his boyfriend. Okuyasu growled, tugging Josuke’s shirt off of him so he could get better access to his chest. There was a twitching cock pressed up against Josuke where there wasn’t a moment before. He was doing something right.

“God, keep talking,” Okuyasu rasped against Josuke’s collarbone, raking his teeth against it.

“You’re so fucking hot,” he panted. Okuyasu broke off momentarily to rip his own shirt off, before going back to leaving bruises on Josuke’s chest. Josuke ghosted fingers up Okuyasu’s sides; he really was sexy.

This was quickly turning into something a lot more than just a hot and heavy makeout session. Not that Josuke minded, considering how the only thing he had on his mind were how badly he wanted Okuyasu’s mouth on his dick at that very moment. Okuyasu seemed to read his mind, and looked Josuke in the eye with a single-minded ferocity that sent chills down his spine.

Which was ruined when both of their stomachs rumbled audibly.

They stared at each other for a moment before they busted out laughing; Josuke had to hold Okuyasu up to keep him from tumbling into the floor. It took a few minutes, but once their hooting died down, Josuke still held onto him, resting his cheek against the side of his head. “We should probably get food,” he said.

“Yeah…raincheck on this?”

“Raincheck.”

Okuyasu straightened up, pecking Josuke on the cheek, “You got pancake mix?”

There was no pankcake mix, but Okuyasu did a bang up job on eggs and bacon, so breakfast wasn’t a lost cause. Really though, anyone who remotely knows their way around the kitchen is a great cook in Josuke’s eyes. It was still pouring the rain, so no weed smoking for them, which was fine since they needed to be sober for the conversation that needed to take place.

“So,” Josuke started, “Does anyone know you’re gay?” They were back in his room, laying on the bed under one of his cotton blankets. Okuyasu laid on his stomach with a pillow propping his head up; Josuke laid on his side facing him.

“Yeah,” Oku shifted to look at him better, “Everyone in the band knows, plus Tonio and Hazamada. Akira too.”

“Really?”

“Unfortunately. I didn’t, uh, come out in the best way…”

Josuke frowned, “You don’t gotta tell me—“

Okuyasu waved a hand, “Nah, s’fine.” He rolled over onto his back, “See, like, I dated this girl when I was 19. Which, she was the only person I ever dated before you, so you’re my first real relationship. You should feel special,“ Oku looked at Josuke through his lashes, grin on his face. Josuke blushed furiously and punched his arm, because he did. Chuckling, Okuyasu continued, “She ended up cheating on me after like a year of being together, which was a relief because I finally had a good excuse to break up with her—“

“Damn. That’s awful,” Josuke scrunched his face up, “How’d you survive pretending to be straight for that long?”

“We were actually good friends before we dated, and she told Keicho that she was madly in love with me. So he, being my big bro who didn’t know I was gay, but did know I’d never had sex, hooked us up,” Okuyasu gave a wry smile, “Didn’t even fuck her. Ended up losing my v-card to some guy in a dirty bathroom after a show.” He rubbed his face at the memory, “Anyways, so like, I was relieved, but kinda upset because you know, she was still someone I cared about and the breakup was really messy. She was cryin’ and apologizin’, all that bullshit. So they, Keicho, Yuuya, and Akira, all decided to get me shitfaced at this huge party some guy Akira knew was throwin’,”

His eyes grew distant as he recounted the story. “So I get pretty hammered. I dunno if ya noticed, but I tend to uh, get nervous when flirting or kissing—“

“Really? Didn’t have a clue,” Josuke said dryly.

“Shut the hell up. Anyways,” he absentmindedly rubbed the hickies on his neck that Josuke gave him as a thank you for breakfast, “when I’m drunk, I ain’t like that. So there was this cute dude, and I thought everyone else had fucked off to do their own thing. I decided, in my dumbass drunken haze, that kissing him was a good idea—“

Josuke gasped, “Oh no—“

Okuyasu held up his hands, “That’s not the bad part. He was into it. We ended up making out and then he like, dragged me off to some room. What I didn’t notice was that Yuuya witnessed all of this, and went off to get Keicho to come save me, I guess. Long story short, the dude sucked me off, and then after I started goin’ down on him, Keicho and Yuuya busted into the room and pulled me off of him—“

“No!” Josuke covered his mouth with his hand, “They didn’t hurt ya, did they?”

“It wasn’t me they hurt,” Okuyasu chuckled without a trace of humor, “Both of them started whooping this dude’s ass. Me, a damn moron, starts bawlin’ like a stupid baby. I was buggin’ the fuck out.”

“So they thought—“

“That he forced me to? Yeah. It was bad.”

Josuke sucked air through his teeth, “So, what happened next?”

“I actually don’t really remember anything after that. Good ol’ Yuuya filled me in the next mornin’ when I had the worst hangover of my life, the bastard,” Okuyasu scowled. “I ended up crying so hard, I upchucked all over my clothes, so they stripped me down to my pants and hauled my drunk ass out of there. The next mornin’, they had a lot of questions, and I had to answer ‘em.”

“What did you say?”

“That I liked dudes, and everything that had happened last night was because I wanted it to,” Okuyasu sighed, “It wasn’t a… fun conversation. I was cryin’ again, like a fuckin’ idiot, and that made my head hurt worse. Keicho was pissed, and Yuuya wasn’t happy either.”

“Not over you likin’ guys, right?” Josuke clarified.

“No, not over me likin’ dudes. It was over me putting myself in that situation in the first place, like a fool. ‘Bad things coulda happened to you, what if we hadn’t had been there, blah blah blah’. Keicho really reamed my ass over it.”

“They had a point,” Josuke said, “so what happened after that?”

“Nothing really. Keicho said he didn’t hate me for being gay, he just hated me for being stupid. Yuuya said that he didn’t care, as long as I’m happy, it’s whatever to him. Akira was a dick, but Akira is always a dick.”

“Your brother is such an asshole.”

Okuyasu shrugged, “Yeah, but he’s always been like that.”

“What about everyone else?”

“As for Hazamada, Yukako, and Tonio knowin’, Hazamada was home when it all went down, so he heard. Tonio knows because I told him, same with Yukako.”

Josuke nodded, then scooted close to Okuyasu and planted a smooch on his cheek, “Thanks for tellin’ me that.”

“You’re welcome,” Oku turned onto his side to look Josuke in the face, “now your turn. Who knows you’re gay?”

“Basically everyone in my personal life. Like, friends and family.” Josuke brushed a stray hair out of his face, “It’s kind of an open secret, I guess? Most people in the industry assume I am.” Josuke grimaced, “It doesn’t stop me getting hit on by women, or rubbed up on, unfortunately.”

Okuyasu chortled, “Yikes. I’m lucky I’m ugly.”

Josuke jabbed him in the ribs with his fingers, “You’re not ugly, stop talking about yourself like that. Anyways,” Josuke huffed, “I came out to my mom and grandpa when I was like 14. They were trying to set me up with the daughter of one of my mom’s friends. I panicked and blurted it out in car on the way to dinner one night.”

Oku cringed, “Ouch. What happened?”

“They were like, oh okay. And then mom started plotting to get me set up with the son of one of her friend’s,” Josuke shook his head, “They were both cool about it, told me they loved me and supported me. The Joestar side of my family was also chill about it. That didn’t surprise me, since Jotaro, my nephew, has a husband, Polnareff has a boyfriend, and my cousin Johnny is seeing some Italian guy.”

“That’s good though. I’m happy for ya,” Okuyasu propped his head up with his arm, “So, you’ve dated guys before right?”

“Yep. I’ve had a few boyfriends, last one was about…” Josuke looked up at the ceiling, trying to remember, “It’s been two years…? Yeah,” he nodded, “Two years ago. That didn’t end well, so I kinda swore off relationships until I met you.”

“Really?? Why me?”

Josuke shrugged, “Dunno, you’re just special.” He wasn’t too surprised to see tears flood Okuyasu’s eyes, given how emotional he could get.

“Jooosukeeeeee,” he whined, tears rolling down his face.

“Don’t cry, you marshmallow fuck,” Josuke wiped the tears away.

It took a minute, as it always did, to get Okuyasu to calm down. Oku pulled Josuke into his arms, big giddy smile on his face, “That last guy must’ve been awful if you think I’m better than he is.”

“First of all, you’re amazing so never say never say that about yourself again, asshole. Second, yeah, he was massive penis.”

“What happened? You don’t gotta tell me if it’s bad,” Okuyasu quickly amended.

“I was just partying waaay too hard when we were together and he was like, an enabler? I think that’s what Koichi called him. We were together a little over 10 months, and during that time I stayed super high or really drunk. It wasn’t good. And he was a huge asshole, and treated me like shit, so,” Josuke shrugged again.

“I’ll kick his ass if I ever see him.”

Josuke snorted at Okuyasu’s threat, “You don’t even know who he is.”

“Do I care? I’ll drop that motherfucker in a heartbeat.”

“You fuckin’ dork,” Josuke kissed Oku on the jaw, “It’s fine, I moved onto bigger and better things. I got you now.”

He felt tears; Okuyasu was crying again. “Damn right you do,” he sniffed.

“Don’t cry again. Come on, let’s watch something.”

“Josuke, wake up.”

“Mmh.”

“Josuke!”

“Mmmmmmh.”

“Wake up, you’re drooling on me again!”

Josuke’s eyes snapped open, “Goddamnit, sorry. I’m so gross when I sleep,” he sat up to wipe drool off of his face and Okuyasu. His headache had eventually gotten the best of him, and he’d fallen asleep with his head resting on Okuyasu’s chest. It wasn’t completely his fault, Oku start playing with his hair while they watched some bad show about vampires, and it relaxed Josuke so much, he passed out. And when he’s that relaxed, Josuke can’t control the flow of spit coming out of his mouth.

“It’s fine dude, I still think you’re cute. How’s your head?”

“Better,” he settled back down into Oku’s arms, “How’s your everything?”

“Eh, I’ll live.”

“Do you wanna switch places? You can sleep on me.”

“Nah, my glasses dig into my face if I try to cuddle like that while watchin’ somethin’. I’m good like this,” he resumed running his fingers through Josuke’s hair.

“You’re gonna put my ass back to sleep doing that. Turn it on something I’ll pay attention to.”

Okuyasu grabbed the PS4 controller, “Whaddya in the mood for?”

“A tacky reality show,” Josuke yawned, “Let’s binge Rock of Love.”

Josuke picked up his phone off of his nightstand as Okuyasu loaded the show, having rescued it from the corner he threw it into earlier. After listening to Okuyasu’s panicked voicemails and reading the avalanche of worried texts he got from him, Josuke made sure to give his boyfriend extra kisses. He felt guilty for causing that much distress.

“Hey, Oku.”

“Yeah?”

“How open do you wanna be about…us?”

“I dunno man, I ain’t got much experience in this,” Okuyasu scratched his chin with his free hand, “What do you wanna do?”

Josuke thought for a moment, “Well, I’m not ready to be out in like, the public eye. But I wanna tell our friends and family.”

“Sounds good,” Okuyasu kissed the top of his head, “I uh, already may have told people?”

Josuke froze up, “Who?”

“Everyone who already knows about me….Y-you ain’t mad about that, right??” Okuyasu’s fingers stopped moving.

He relaxed, “No, it’s okay. I figured you’d want them to know anyways”

Josuke heard a sigh of relief, “Okay, cool. Also I took a video of you sleepin’ on me earlier, that’s what I sent to them.”

“Oh god,” Josuke groaned, “Don��t tell me you could see the drool in it.”

Okuyasu grabbed his phone and pulled up Snapchat, “I’m an asshole, not cruel.” He had posted the video to his story; it was just of him playing with Josuke’s hair as he slept, with a little heart sticker in the corner. It was adorable.

“Shit, that’s cute. What was everyone’s reaction?”

“Uhh, got congratulations from Tonio, Hazamada sent me a snap of him miming throwing up, Yuuya asked if we banged yet, Yukako told me to not tonguefuck you in front of her, and Keicho only sent me that straight-faced emoji, which is better than I expected. Since you know, after last night—“

“That fistfight was over me, wasn’t it?”

“Ehhh, kinda?” Oku sounded like he didn’t want to talk about it, “Mostly about how I was with you all the time and he didn’t trust you, it was fuckin’ stupid. I don’t think it was really about you? I think it was about like, me not wanting to be up his ass all the time anymore. I dunno, it was typical Keicho bullshit.”

Josuke grumbled under his breath about kicking Keicho’s ass, but Okuyasu flicked his forehead, “I got it handled, don’t worry ya pretty head over it.”

Too late, Josuke groused to himself. Instead of bitching about it, Josuke opened up Snapchat on his phone. He started recording, “Hey Oku, kiss me.”

The video of them kissing was worth the shitstorm of replies, texts, and phone calls Josuke had to deal with for the rest of the day.

It was late, and the rain still hadn’t petered out. “You’re staying tonight, right?” Josuke asked, speaking softly into Oku’s ear. This time, he had won out on being Big Spoon.

“Do you want me to?” came the sleepy reply.

“Uh, duh. I wouldn’t have asked if I didn’t want ya to.”

“Don’t be a dick, Higashikata. I’ll roll my fatass out of here too quick to talk about.”

“I’m kidding, I’m kidding.”

“Me too. ‘Sides, we all know you got the fat ass in this relationship.” Okuyasu cackled despite Josuke jabbing him in the ribs, “What?? It’s a compliment.”

Josuke pouted, “You’re lucky I like you, Nijimura, or I’d push your ass out of bed.”

“Don’t do that, I don’t got the cushion like you do, it’d hurt—“

He launched Okuyasu off the bed as hard as he could. Oku landed in a heap on the floor, snorting and rolling around like a pig in a sty. He peered down at his porcine boyfriend, “You’re a mess, you farm animal.”

Josuke miscalculated; Okuyasu grabbed him by the shirt collar and pulled him down on top of him, knocking their heads together. Another power struggle took place, with Okuyasu winning yet again by tangling himself firmly around Josuke. With some effort, Oku pulled down a pillow and blanket, and wrapped it around them snuggly. “Bedtime, Jojo,” he kissed the top of Josuke’s head.

The floor wasn’t very comfortable, but when Okuyasu started snoring, Josuke followed him to dreamland.

The next morning, Tamami accidentally nailed Josuke in the dick when he stepped on what he assumed was a pile of blankets on the floor. Tamami was kicked in the cock and balls by an enraged Josuke, then booted downstairs. Okuyasu bypassed laughing and went straight to crying, tears of mirth leaked from his eyes. He promptly shut up when Josuke told him to kiss it and make it feel better.

Maybe next time.

#josuke higashikata #okuyasu nijimura #josuyasu #josuke x okuyasu #jjba #quick q: would it make sense if i changed my url to my ao3 handle? anyone got any thoughts on that

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shirtlesssammy · 7 years

Text

All Hell Breaks Loose: Part One: Recap

Then:

Sam is a special demon psychic snowflake and the whole thing is spinning out of control!

Now:

It’s been a long time, but while on the road the boys stop at a diner, and Dean wants some pie.

While Sam gets their grub, Dean cranks his Boston. His radio starts to crap out though and he looks around in wonder. He quickly notices that there is something hinky happening in the diner and runs to Sam’s help. Once in the diner, he notices customers and staff lying dead in pools of their own blood, but no Sam —just sulfur!

Sam, meanwhile, is resting peacefully.

Err, he’s in Westworld* Frontierland. *Boris has never actually seen Westworld. Anyway, upon waking he tries several shop doors with no luck and finally runs into another human: Andy, the psychic dude that conned Dean out of the Impala. They have a fun catch-up, and then hear screaming and run to check it out. It’s Ava! (Uh, she was mentioned in the Then, but I don’t remember her story. We’ll recap it one day, I promise!) She’s freaking out! Andy’s freaking out! And Sam is Mr. Cool. They soon hear another voice and meet Jake and Lily. They’re all SUPER confused, and all 23 years old. Btw, Lily wins with the whole killing people with a touch of her hand. Ugh. Sam fills all the Yellow Eyed Demon Specials in on what brought them to this place.

Meanwhile, Bobby and Dean are lost on how to locate Sam. Dean gets a call from Ash (Awww, Ash!!!) He knows but can’t talk over the phone. It’s huge. Dean and Bobby head to the roadhouse.

Sam’s new buddies think he’s crazy. Sam tries to give his best Jack Shephard line: “Live together, Die alone.” but no one is buying it. (Whew, bringing out a Lost reference is really dating me, sorry.)

Thunder rolls, and Jake, the brooding soldier wanders alone through the desolate funhouse landscape. Will he find the answers he’s looking for? Will it start raining before he finds shelter? Will he stupidly investigate visions of creepy girls in windows alone? Yes, to that last one apparently.

Creepy ghost girl shows herself and prepares to attack.

Sam attacks first and iron bars her away (He also calls her a demon, but she really seemed like a ghost to me?)

Sam realizes where they are: Cold Oak, SD. A town so haunted every resident fled the joint. Lily wants to get the hell out of Dodge. No one points it out to her that they’re not in Dodge. (I’m so funny.) Anyway, Sam tries to remain the voice of reason. Lily reveals that she accidentally killed her girlfriend. Wow. <Insert no joke because that’s some sad shit.>

Sam keeps the group mostly* together and instructs them to find weapons. *Lily takes off on her own.

Dean and Bobby rumble to the roadhouse and find it burnt to the ground. Dean finds Ash’s watch in the rubble. I don’t remember being too broken up about this on my first viewing, but upon subsequent viewings, I’m seriously bummed. Ash was great and this is really sad.

Lily keeps walking away from the group, in the forest, towards laughing child voices. Sounds like a plan. Sam finds a knife. Ava is hungry. Andy finds salt. They all discover that Lily is missing, but quickly find her.

Yep, she’s hanging from a rope in the town center. Ava wants to get the hell out of there, but the others realize it’s not going to be that easy. Sam is missing his brother. Aww. Andy says that he can try to use his mojo to contact Dean.

Dean is bitching about not finding Sam, when he gets a vision. He buckles under the psychic intrusion and tries to brush it off when he sees flashes of Sam and the bell in the town. Good thing Bobby’s there with his penetrating gaze and questions about what is obviously some kind of Sam-like vision. Bobby asks immediately if the engraving on the bell is an oak tree and based only on that fact, knows where to find Sam. We all want to grow up to be Bobby, right?

Back at the frontier theme park Sam and his new buddies continue to weapon up. Sam bonds with soldier Jake over their shared war experiences. We also get some fun dialogue about how Sam is beginning to doubt Dean’s ability to solve all problems, setting that up nicely for season 4.

Azazel’s recruits lay out salt circles, light candles, and line the windowsills with salt. Ava tells Sam that she wants to just curl up with Brady and watch bad TV. Sam breaks the bad news: her fiance is dead. She falls into his arms, weeping.

Sam falls asleep and Azazel walks into his dreams. Azazel tells Sam that he’s gathered them in this town to kill each other off until one person stands. Azazel wants a leader for his army. The rest of the “soldiers” are collateral damage. He tells Sam that Jess had to die because otherwise Sam would end up a tax lawyer with 2 babies and a paunch instead of a hunter/soldier in his prime.

The dream shifts to baby Sam’s nursery. Azazel explains that he accidentally murdered his mother. Yeah. She was in the wrong place at the wrong time. “It wasn’t about her, it was about you.” Sam watches, shocked, as past-Azazel infects him with demon blood. Mary walks in and sees past-Azazel.

“It’s you,” Mary says. (Unsuspecting viewer: WHAAAA?) Horrified, Sam watches her get dragged to the ceiling and then...Sam wakes up to the news that Ava is missing. As they head off to look for her, Ava skulks out from behind a building. You can practically see the moustache twirling.

With the recruits divided, Ava corners Andy alone and lets the creepy demon child into the house to kill off Andy. She begins to weep and scream, claiming that she had gone out to get water from the well. Sam sees the window open and salt brushed away and calls her on her lies. He puts eight and five together and realizes that Ava had been fully in control during her five months’ absence.

She owns up to it. “People just keep showing up,” she says gleefully. “Children like us. Batches of 3 or 4 at a time.” She reveals that she’s getting into the killing. “I can’t believe I just started out having dreams. Do you know what I can do now?” She calls her demon girl in to get rid of Sam but Jake steps in and snaps her neck. Her control of the demon severed, the demon zooms away.

Sam decides it’s time to leave, only to be stopped by Jake. Jake reveals a similar dream from Azazel and tells Sam that he knows only one person can leave the town alive. If he escapes, Jake explains, he’ll kill Azazel for sure. So, could he please just kill Sam already and get it over with? Sam tries to talk him down. He drops his knife on the ground as a show of good faith. Jake slowly sets his weapon down as well. But then Jake gives Sam a super strength wallop. Yeah. Forgot about the super strength, eh?

The two engage in fisticuffs. Sam grabs the iron bar from the ground, knocking out Jake. He lifts his hand for the killing blow then stops and tosses away the weapon. Because he’s Sam Fucking Winchester.

And then there’s Dean, yelling for his brother. Bobby and Dean have found their way to the town! You can practically hear the sound of trumpets hailing our heroes. And then a not-so-passed-out Jake stabs Sam in the back and twists the knife up towards his heart. Bobby runs after Jake while Dean cradles Sam. “It’s not even that bad,” he says as Sam dies in his arms.

Me RN ^^

You wanted to end this week on a down note, right? You’re welcome. (Bwahh, and we have no scheduled date on recapping the second part to this episode!! The agonizing, tense, painful wait will probably not be worth it!)

The Ultimate Quote Match:

See if they got any pie. Bring me some pie!

Give me a minute. I’m still working through “demons are real”.

Gay porn, all hours of the day.

That was about as fun as getting kicked in the jewels.

I don’t think God has much to do with this, Sam.

#supernatural #spn recap #all hell breaks loose #spn 2x21 #dean winchester #Sam Winchester #spn rewatch #season 2 #all hell breaks loose: part 1 #bobby singer #ash #azazel #mary winchester

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