#gerry (very good girls)

[wndaswife]

plant roses at your feet | gerri fields & fem!reader

The week-long trip to visit your best friend goes awry when it seems that Gerri’s changed since she moved away for school.

Word count: 9028

Tags: angst, fluff, jealousy, depictions of a panic attack, implications of internalized homophobia, unrequited love for a second, cheesy love confession

Carrying your luggage behind you, you stepped off of the train and quickly read over Gerri’s texts. As per her instructions, you should be stepping off from Platform Five before turning left, taking an escalator, then going through the station until you reached Gate Three.

You’d been so excited to see her that you had even searched up pictures of the station, meticulously planning out what it would feel like to finally be meeting up with your best friend after parting from each other at the end of the summer. Though you were still worried about getting lost, you followed the instructions Gerri messaged you and finally made it to the front of the station.

In the middle of typing a text to her letting her know you were waiting at the front parking lot, you heard someone call out to you from the far left and you turned to see Gerri waving at you.

It had only been a few months since you last saw each other, but Gerri looked different. Her hair, that was now a few inches longer than you could last remember, was styled differently, and in a subtle way, the way she did her makeup seemed different too. 

But she looked so pretty.

Gerri always looked so pretty.

You embraced each other and she uttered into your shoulder, “I’ve missed you so much.”

“I missed you too,” you replied, feeling a warm comfort settle within you at the feeling of being with your best friend again. 

Her hair smelled like mangoes, so you supposed she was still using the same kind of shampoo. That made you happy, in a way. 

She pulled away from you and took your backpack from your shoulder. She carried it for you while you wheeled your small travel luggage behind you. “There’s a ton I wanna catch you up on, but David’s friend is waiting in the car for us and I don’t wanna keep him waiting,” she told you and you walked beside her and into the parking lot.

“David? Like, the same guy from summer?”

Gerri looked over at you with a grin that made her look proud of herself. “Yeah,” she answered. “I forgot to tell you, but one of my roommates knows someone who’s rooming with a guy that’s close friends with David, so I saw him at some frat party. He’s visiting the US and he’s been staying with Sam — the guy who drove me here.”

You felt a bit lightheaded trying to catch up with the sudden dump of details of all these people Gerri knew, and as if mind wasn’t already struggling to keep up, she added, “When we get back, I’ll introduce you to everyone.”

Trying not to sound too confused and consequently bitter, you asked, “Everyone…?”

The both of you reached the car and Gerri helped you tuck your things away in the trunk while she answered, “There are a few people back at my place right now, but they’re just friends of mine and Zoey.”

You’ve heard of Zoey before. She was Gerri’s roommate. But the last you heard about her, Gerri had been having issues with rooming with her. You supposed they got along now, but you weren’t sure when that started happening.

“You’ll like them,” she reassured, squeezing your upper arm supportively then getting into the passenger’s seat after your luggage was tucked away in the trunk. 

You watched as she buckled her seatbelt and turned her head to start a conversation you couldn’t hear with Sam, and for a moment you wondered if it would’ve been better for you to stay somewhere else. But when Gerri looked at you through the side mirror and gestured for you to get into the car, you smiled and felt encouraged.

Though you certainly weren’t in the mood for socialising and all you’d really wanted to do was spend the day alone with Gerri at her place watching movies and getting takeout like you always would, the way she turned around and asked you if you wanted to stop for anything made you think that it wouldn’t be… that bad.

As long as you were with her.

Sam carried your things up and Gerri told you a bit about her friends as you trailed behind. She told you what she thought of them and whether or not she thought you’d like them. There were a few of them you were almost excited to meet — Winona and Caroline — but you still checked the time on your phone before the door to her dorm was unlocked as you tried to estimate what time it would be that everyone would go home.

It was three in the afternoon and they must’ve gotten there a few hours prior to when you arrived at the station, so it couldn’t be more than four or five hours until they left if they wanted to stay for dinner.

You were wrong about that.

Or just disillusioned to begin with.

Gerri’s idea of ‘a few people’ meant enough people that the entire living room was stuffy with a crowd of people, all of them friends or at least friends of mutual friends, where the balcony was polluted with cigarette and joint smoke and the kitchen and dining room was littered with students that were afternoon-drinking. 

Everywhere you turned there were conversations and commentary on things like consumerism and classic literature and film that you realised people thought were the pinnacle of what it meant to be an artistic and well-spoken individual interacting with other artistic and well-spoken individuals.

And Gerri… Where was Gerri?

It was nearly nine now and you’d only seen her a few times since you entered through the door together with Sam. You got by without her by taking frequent trips to the washroom, unpacking your things as slowly as you could, and even taking a walk around the neighbourhood during which you stopped for a pack of beer at a convenience store so you had an excuse for if anyone noticed your absence.

No one did, but it got you a few good first impressions when you set it down on the kitchen counter.

Caroline ended up being sort of annoying, and you were glad when Winona came around for it was right after Caroline said something vaguely elitist that you would have struggled to say something useful in response to had it not been for Winona coming around with a can of Smirnoff Ice for you, asking if you were Gerri’s friend.

She was nice and you did enjoy her company for a while until you finished your drink and kept seeing brief glances of Gerri before she quickly disappeared beyond the crowd of people each time.

Standing in the open kitchen and having watched Gerri pass you countless times without seeming to be looking for you, you suddenly felt a bit down and even kind of tired.

It was ten in the evening by the time you told Winona you needed to talk to Gerri, and you bid a goodbye to perhaps the only person you enjoyed talking with that entire day after exchanging numbers with each other.

Feeling pretty tipsy and rather sleepy, you slid your way through the crowd of people and finally made your way to Gerri’s side. She was talking with David and Sam and another taller guy that looked sort of nice because he had a crooked tie and a pair of aviator glasses on, but you didn’t pay much mind to anyone but Gerri once you got the closest you’ve been with her since the afternoon.

“I was looking for you!” she said when she turned to you, a red solo cup in her hand. You couldn’t find it in yourself to be upset with her, but maybe you would’ve been annoyed at the very least if you were sober. She introduced you to her friends.

“Nice seeing you again, Y/N,” you heard David greet you.

You weren’t sure if you actually responded to him, but you thought you did. Either way, you told Gerri, “I think I’m just gonna head to bed early, Ger. Sorry. I’m just tired from the train. Is there something I can set up in your room or is there a guest room?”

“Shit, I forgot to set your things up,” she hissed then looked into the hallway where her bedroom was. “There’s, uh, a cot or something in the closet but… Well, it’s fine, you can sleep in my bed. Do you need help unpacking?”

“No, I unpacked earlier. Thanks,” you replied, and that time you knew for sure that you said something to her friends for you waved them goodbye and told them you hoped to see them again, which was completely disingenuous.

Earlier when you unpacked, you looked through Gerri’s things, but seeing her bedroom from your position on her bed made things look different. It was like you could see things from her eyes as you looked around at her desk and her books and her posters, smelling the scent of her hair and a bit of her perfume from her pillows, bringing her blanket up to your shoulders and imagining it was her wrapped around your body.

Then you forgot about Gerri and who she seemed to be earlier — someone completely different, a version of her that you felt distant from. Laying in her bed surrounded by nothing but her in the dark silence of her bedroom, the sounds of the party muffled, you truly felt like you had come home to her like you had wanted when you got off the train.

Before you fell asleep, you saw your phone light up with the notification that Winona requested to follow your Instagram account. 

That made you feel pretty good.

Gerri must’ve gone to bed late for you didn’t notice that she got into bed with you until the next morning when you woke up and felt her mess of wavy brown hair stretched out against your bare clavicle and tickling your skin. She was facing you, her hand tucked under her cheek and her other arm draped around her clothed midriff.

She was now wearing an old shirt she’d gotten with you when you went to Venice Beach together one summer, and it made you smile when you realised how worn it had gotten over the years of usage.

Watching her tranquil sleeping expression and listening to the soft inhales and exhales of her sleeping form reminded you of all the times you’d slept over at her place. You’d been friends with Gerri since childhood, but you were mostly thinking of the time you spent together before the school year started.

It felt like things changed last summer, though you couldn’t exactly place a finger on how. Maybe it had been the knowledge that you were going to move away from each other in September, but you just saw Gerri differently.

It was warmer when you were with her and she felt dearer to you. Your heart would beat nearly twice as fast sometimes when she got close enough to you. That summer, things were just lighter and gentler, things smelled sweeter and the time spent with Gerri felt… perfect.

Everything that summer was perfect.

While watching her in the peaceful silence of her bedroom, you felt like things really were as they used to be for the first time since both you and Gerri moved away.

And that made you really, really happy.

Gerri stirred and she rolled onto her back, groaning softly and rubbing her face before stretching her arms upwards. She went limp for a few moments as her arms laid back above her head. Then she rubbed her eyes and opened them as she exhaled softly. She turned to you, meeting your eyes as you were on your side looking at her.

You felt like she was really looking at you now, her undivided attention on you. Ever since you met up with her at the station, it felt like she was always thinking about something else — anything else but you.

“I’m sorry about the party last night,” Gerri said quietly the moment she turned onto her side, bringing her knees up and tucking a hand under her pillow. “I really didn’t expect for there to be so many people. When I left to pick you up, there were only a few friends here.”

Looking at her fresh morning face and her messy brown hair and listening to the soft rasp of her quiet voice made you feel so warm; you were completely willing to forget all about last night.

“I get it,” you replied with a supportive smile. “It’s totally fine. I’m just glad we get to have time to ourselves now.”

Gerri smiled then, and you felt yourself flush at the sight of her. 

“Besides, I sorta made a friend,” you added. “Winona and I exchanged numbers last night and she requested to follow my Instagram.”

Her face formed a bit of a dubious expression when you said that. “Really?” she asked. “She, like, never talks. She’s Sam’s cousin but we’ve had probably about two conversations since I first met her in October.”

“I wouldn’t have thought her to be the quiet type,” you said. “She was super nice and talkative with me.”

There was a momentary indiscernible look on her face before she redirected her focus and started talking about something else. “Do you wanna go for lunch?” she proposed after checking the time on her phone and seeing that it was eleven in the afternoon. “There’s a really good all-day breakfast place I know.”

The both of you got dressed together in the same room while talking about Gerri’s classes and how you felt about living alone and without a roommate. She talked about her parents visiting next weekend and how much she missed Poppy, the dog they’d just gotten before she had to leave for school.

Gerri was almost convinced that they bought her as her replacement while she was gone. But she didn’t care all that much; she was a good replacement. She ended up liking the chocolate lab quite a bit in spite of her lack of experience with pets.

You wondered if any of her other friends knew about Poppy and how Gerri initially hated when she licked at her face, and how she eventually warmed up to it to the point that she had the puppy sleeping in her bed nearly every night before she moved out.

There were a lot of things you knew about Gerri that you sort of hoped no one else knew about her. Last night, there was so much about her that you felt so distant from, like a large part of her was unknown to you. You could understand the rationality of it for it’d been a few months since you last saw her, and anyone’s first year would bring about some change.

But there were parts of Gerri you just wanted to yourself — parts of her that were genuinely, sincerely her.

A thought that made your chest tighten ran through your mind: What if who Gerri was had changed? 

What if there were parts of her you couldn’t get to know the way you used to know her? What if things could never be like how they used to?

The train of thought followed you all throughout the walk to the restaurant, but was discarded and momentarily forgotten when you and Gerri were seated at the all-day breakfast place she recommended.

For a little while as you went through the menu together, discussing what to order and bringing up shared memories that the both of you were reminded of the further your conversation progressed, things suddenly just felt so… natural and perfect.

Gerri laughed at something you said and you lifted your eyes from the menu in front of you to watch how a wide smile spread across her pretty lightly-freckled face still fresh of makeup. Her lively laugh relaxed into a soft fit of giggles and she met your eyes, which for an inexplicable reason made you flush and look back down to your menu.

After months of not seeing their best friend, anyone would’ve felt as eager as you to finally spend time with them. Maybe it was precisely because of the time you’d spent away from her that made things feel so different, but sitting across from Gerri, immersing yourself in the feeling of being the only person who had her attention, you felt that something had changed.

It wasn’t that things were in any way extraordinarily different, though you were sure at least some things had changed since the summer, but instead it was that something had changed within you. And it felt profound, in a way, and you wished to understand where the feeling had come from and what it meant, but before you could, someone approached the table and took Gerri’s focus away from you.

You didn’t pay much attention once Gerri exclaimed excitedly at the sight of the girl standing by your table, and instead you redirected your attention to your phone. You accepted Winona’s request from last night and followed her back, distractedly looking through her posts as you listened in on Gerri’s conversation. 

If you weren’t looking right at her while she was speaking, it was almost hard to tell that it was Gerri talking. She sounded different — the rises and falls in her tone, the vocabulary she used, the inside jokes she referenced that you didn't understand, and the people she talked about that you didn’t know.

A part of you tried to tell you how delusional and obsessive you were being, and that maybe you just felt insecure about not being as much a part of Gerri’s life as you used to. But even so, you couldn’t stop the angry bitter pit that formed in your stomach, sticking to your insides like hot tar the longer you listened to their conversation.

At one point or another, you had subtly reminded Gerri that you only had a week with her; there were only three days left in your stay, and the past two days were filled with what you could only describe as being forgotten about.

You understood that Gerri was still a full-time student with things to do and that she wasn’t going to drop everything just because you were visiting — although some selfish part of you did entertain the idea for a few minutes when you were on the train fantasising about your trip.

But the last two days, Gerri had sometimes left for classes while you were sleeping, leaving you alone to wake up to her roommate as your only company, or a completely empty place without so much as letting you know where she was or when she’d be back. She’d stay out for a few hours past the last of her classes to go out with her friends, leaving you back at her place like you were her pet.

There was one occasion that got you particularly upset when Gerri had left in the afternoon only for you to find that she had gone out to meet her friends at a cafe. It had only been for an hour or two but you felt disrespected and abandoned all the same.

The only thing that had brought you any form of comfort since your first night here was the returning feeling of having slept in Gerri’s bed that one night, the stillness and permanence of her in her books and blankets and posters, a side of her that you at the time had felt no one knew.

During your lonely hours away from her spending most of your time in her bedroom, you became curious at one point when you realised you hadn’t yet seen Gerri’s guitar. She used to practise nearly every day and since you’d arrived, you hadn’t seen her pick it up even once. 

You knew she brought it for when you hugged her goodbye the day that she left, she had her guitar carefully stored in the backseat in its protective casing. 

One evening you started looking for it and found it tucked away somewhere almost completely obscured in her closet behind her jackets and laying against the back panelling. 

It was true that there were some parts of Gerri you wanted all to yourself, and if she hadn’t played in a while let alone ever brought her guitar out, no one but you knew that she played nor that it was a hobby of hers. But seeing it stored away, almost hidden from everything… 

It felt different. 

It felt horrible.

When she came back that night you felt inexplicably bitter and cold to her, but if she noticed how upset you were she didn’t mention it.

An afternoon came when the two of you finally made plans to go out together on your own. In a few hours, you and Gerri were going to a drive-in theatre a city away. A movie from the film series the both of you used to love when you were younger had come out, and you were mostly seeing it for nostalgia’s sake, but also because you’d be able to spend time together.

Gerri was talking about what she did last night when she came back a bit later than she said she would, detailing her outing with David and Sam. 

There were two days left before you had to take the train back to your place, so although you were upset with Gerri, you were determined not to let anything ruin the last little while you had with her, even if that meant biting your tongue when she talked about things you would much rather not listen to and avoiding bringing up what you were upset about.

Trying to change the subject quickly while Gerri stopped talking to chew on a pizza bite, you said, “Winona said she might be in town, so we could hang out.”

She made a face as if what you said was funny and spoke with her mouth partially full, “We? Like, you and me?”

“No — her and I,” you replied. “‘In town’ meaning, like, my town. Where I live.”

Gerri chewed while she stared at you and you couldn’t decipher why it was so bizarre for her that you’d made a friend while you were here. Then she swallowed and lifted another pizza bite to her mouth before asking, “What do you even talk about with her? She’s super boring.”

“She’s not,” you defended, now feeling a bit agitated not because Gerri insulted Winona but because she was acting so oddly and you couldn’t understand why. “How would you know she’s boring if you never talk with her?”

“I don’t talk with her because she’s boring.”

Looking up from your phone, you answered, “Well, maybe she’s boring because she just doesn’t want to talk to you.”

Gerri put her hands up in sarcastic surrender. “Sorry,” she scoffed. “Didn’t know you were so close.”

Thankfully, before any sort of argument started, Zoey came out from her room and mentioned a frat party that was happening, and that the guys were friends with David and wanted to throw him a party before he had to leave for Paris.

You watched Gerri’s expression as Zoey gave her more details, and you watched how her mind seemed practically made up the moment she was told that her group of friends were going.

She didn’t even have to be asked to go before she said, “Yeah, okay, I’ll be there.” When you shifted in your spot, she looked over at you. “Oh, Y/N, you can come too. It'll be fun.”

An afterthought. 

That’s all you were to her.

What were you to do anyways if you didn’t go?

“I don’t know anyone going, Ger,” you told her nervously as you fiddled with the rings on your fingers.

“I’ll be there with you the whole time. It’s fine,” she tried to reassure you as the two of you and Zoey took the streetcar down to where the party was a few blocks away. “I’ve been to, like, hundreds of these. Y/N, you’ll like it.”

In spite of everything that had been happening the past few days, Gerri telling you that she’d be there with you for the party brought you… a lot of comfort. It made you feel like she knew how important it was to you that she was there with you, which almost sort of reestablished your relationship with her that you sometimes felt like she forgot about.

Maybe it was the feeling of being caught up in what Gerri told you on the way there, but when you were walking up to the frat house together, you didn’t think twice before telling her, “You look really pretty, Gerri.”

And she did look really pretty; you weren’t just saying it because of how you felt.

Gerri turned her head to look at you and you saw her eyes meet yours, her lips parting after a moment of looking your face over with a sincerity that seemed meaningful to you before Zoey opened the front door, inviting a rupture of noise and cheers onto the porch that stopped Gerri from saying whatever she was going to say.

Sam gave you a quick hello then pulled Gerri into the house at the sight of her and you followed behind her a bit uncomfortably, looking around at the crowds of people that was easily at least more than fifteen times the size of the party that you walked into when you first arrived.  

For the first hour and a half of the night, Gerri didn’t even look back at you trailing behind her wherever she went unless you were all doing shots together, most of which she did without you anyways. 

It seemed to you that she only paid you any attention when she could remember you were there.

When someone tapped you on the shoulder, you turned to see a familiar strawberry blonde standing behind you with a friendly sober smile. “I’ve been looking for you,” Winona said, and you felt comfortable believing her.

“It’s so chaotic here,” she told you, looking around at the bustling party. Then you realised for the first time that Gerri was telling the truth — she sort of was a bit of an introverted person. She never seemed like it until now. 

She looked back over to you. “There’s a small terrace on the roof. Wanna go up?”

“I thought I heard a few guys say they wanted to go for a smoke up there but couldn’t get the terrace door unlocked,” you recalled.

Winona gave you a small sly smile then reached into her jeans’ pocket and subtly flashed you a silver key before quickly sliding it back into her pocket. At the sight of your surprised expression, she said, “The key was hanging from a nail at the top of the doorframe.”

You laughed and she took your hand, pulling through the crowd of people and swiping a few things from the buffet counter in the kitchen before the both of you headed to the highest floor where the terrace door was.

Distracted by Winona, you hadn’t seen the way Gerri followed you with her eyes through the crowd, watching with scorn brewing in her chest the moment she saw your interlaced hands peek from between the crowd of people as you followed Sam’s cousin upstairs.

It was nearly two whole hours that you spent with Winona, and you really couldn’t believe it when you checked the time on your phone by chance when you got a notification.

“Is it really almost eleven now?” she asked, surprised. 

The pizza and drinks she brought up were long finished, and the two of you didn’t drink even once. You’d sobered up from the shots earlier, and it felt so nice to finally have a sincere conversation with someone.

Winona was nice. She was creative and sensitive and, for whatever reason, she very obviously held you in high regards. 

You enjoyed talking with her and you felt a bit terrible for being what you could only describe as pessimistic, but there was something she was missing that you just felt you needed to have. She was nice for conversations and in every platonic sense, and you could see yourself enjoying her company in your future too. 

But there was a figure that formed in your mind each time she flushed at your inadvertent compliments and the nervous way she played with the sleeves of her shirt when she said she couldn’t help but stalk your Instagram a little when you first accepted her request.

A figure that stood out starkly from Winona took shape in your mind. But you couldn’t figure out who it was, only that Winona could never fill it.

So when she leaned forward and tried to kiss you when the two of you stood and went to step down from the terrace so she could go home and study for a midterm that she had in the morning, you turned your head the slightest bit, allowing her lips to just miss yours, but enough for her to get the point.

“I’m sorry,” she quickly apologised. “I’m sorry, I must have misread things…”

You quickly reassured her and reached out for her hand which she nearly pulled away from you before she let you take it. “No, it’s fine. You’re fine,” you said.

“I didn’t make this weird, did I?” she asked. “I mean… It’s not uncomfortable now, is it?”

Your heart was pained when you watched her guilty eyes meet yours. She really was so nice. But… you couldn’t do it. 

Not with her. 

“No, you didn’t. It’s totally, totally fine,” you told her. “You’re a really cool person, Winona, and I’m so glad to have met you while visiting here. But, I…”

Her eyes searched yours before she said, “But you like someone else.”

You weren’t sure if that was true or not. So you just looked at her in a helpless sort of way. “I don’t know,” you answered. “I’m just sorry, I don’t want to make you feel embarrassed or upset.”

Winona shook her head. “I’m not. I’ll get over it. You’re… really cool too,” she admitted. “I can still visit you, right? And we’re still friends?”

Nodding, you answered confidently, “Yeah. Of course.”

You navigated your way to the back door for Winona to be able to leave quietly. She didn’t live closeby, and was only staying with Sam while she visited for his birthday. So you waited with her while her Uber came so she didn’t have to take public transport. You told her that you’d text her when you were back home, and that you’d plan a weekend together where she could stay at your place.

You felt pretty satisfied for having handled that the way you did, and you were happy that you were still friends with Winona. 

Feeling pretty fired up from the interaction and perhaps a bit inspired by Winona’s attempt to kiss you and the overt intimacy that came with it, you decided to talk with Gerri. 

You weren’t sure what you would say nor what kinds of feelings you’d be trying to convey to her, only that you had something to say and that you didn’t want to keep pretending that you didn’t. 

The feeling was short-lived for when you searched for Gerri and even finding the confidence in yourself to ask around for her, you eventually found yourself peeking in one of the bedrooms on the ground floor and seeing her sitting alone with David, his hand in her pretty brown hair with his lips kissing down her perfumed neck. 

Perhaps it would’ve been better to slip out quietly, but your legs had other intentions when they forced you to stumble back against the bedroom door and alert the two of them of your presence. 

Something alike to an apology came out of you, but it was more a medley of unintelligible half-spoken words than anything. 

David, now feeling a bit uncomfortable as the confrontation-avoidant person he was, stood up from the bed and apologised, but to who and for what reason you could not comprehend. 

Gerri watched as he left the room and you heard but did not process what he turned around and told her before he left, but it made her repress a laugh. 

Eventually Gerri stood too and when she approached you, you realised you were still standing at the bedroom door, stunned. She ran her hands down her jeans and asked, “Are you surprised?”

“… What?” you managed to say.

“Are you surprised?” she repeated. “I didn’t even know he was into me like that. I mean… No clue.”

You searched her eyes for something and though you weren’t entirely sure what you were looking for, you knew that you weren’t able to find it. She could hardly meet your eyes and you felt that perhaps she truly didn’t care about what you thought of her relationship with David, and you suddenly realised you really had grown distant from Gerri this time.

“Ger, do you wanna play?” David called from the living room where an empty space had been cleared for the beer pong table.

“Yeah, just a second!” she answered and without even turning to you, she moved to leave the bedroom.

Without thinking twice about it, you reached out and wrapped your hand around Gerri’s wrist, tugging her back into the open bedroom. “Don’t you care about what I think?” you suddenly asked her.

Gerri’s eyebrows pushed together as if confused by your outburst. “Okay,” she gave in and tore her arm wrist out of your hand. She massaged it with her fingers then let it fall to her side. “Fine. What do you think about it, Y/N? Go on. Tell me.”

You didn’t appreciate the sarcasm and resentment in her voice but you answered anyways, “You don’t even know David. Not really. Do you… even know his favourite song? His favourite band? Do you know what kinds of movies he hates? You’ve never even been to his house!”

You knew you were grasping at straws; your bubbling anger and upset had burst into a nonsensical dump of emotions and irritability.

“What the fuck are you even talking about?” Gerri asked, leaning forward and drilling her eyes into yours. “No one cares about that shit but you. Like, movies and songs?”

Her words pricked at your skin and you felt on edge. Your face felt hot and your anger only began to pique, but suddenly just looking at Gerri put some kind of silence to it all. And you felt like you were about to cry. 

Taking your tongue between your teeth to avoid letting your tears form, you gritted out quietly, “You used to care about that stuff too.” 

But your words didn’t reach her, like she hadn’t even heard them at all.

Gerri ran her fingers through her hair and scoffed. Her hands dropped to her sides. “Listen, Y/N… I thought you would’ve been happy about David and I, but-but…” Her hands waved around in front of her wildly as she tried to find her words. “But you’re acting like such a jealous bitch!”

It felt like the floor was about to collapse from underneath you.

“For once, you’re not the one getting the guys and that makes you crazy. Well, guess what? This is the real world, so grow up,” she bit.

You looked away, staring at some spot on the floor people kept stepping over, completely unaware and uncaring of the arguing you and Gerri were having. A part of you wished someone would at least give you a judgemental look so you’d feel for a moment that your entire world wasn’t what was happening right in front of you.

“What’s your problem?” she asked, breaking the silence.

“I came here to see you and spend time with you.”

She threw her arms up, hinting towards the party behind her. “Well, hello? Where do you think we are?”

“Gerri, this isn’t hanging out together; it’s hanging out with all these other people,” you said, then looked around at the crowd. They all seemed so far. Or rather, you just felt like a complete outsider. “I don’t even know who these people are. I came to be with you.”

“So, it’s my fault you’re antisocial as fuck and can’t make friends?”

Afraid that if you spoke any louder then your voice would break and shatter any sort of confidence you made it seem like you had, you met her eyes and whispered, “Fuck you.”

“Y/N, you try and paint yourself as some kind of victim here, but you’re being so fucking clingy and posessive! I’m not the spineless indecisive person I was before. I’m not just going to be your pet,” she retorted, her voice raising. 

You’d never seen Gerri so upset before.

Maybe she was right.

“It’s just not going to be the same anymore,” she added with finality, and you could swear that you couldn’t hear your heartbeat in your ears for nearly eight whole seconds.

Had your heart stopped?

People couldn’t function without their heartbeats, could they?

You raised your hand to your chest and massaged your fingertips into your shirt, feeling your heart’s beating beyond your ribcage.

Slowly, your hearing returned and you landed back on the ground, your legs trembling slightly and each and every overwhelming noise from the surrounding party bouncing around the inside of your skull, fracturing your very being from the inside out. 

“Are you in love with me or something?” Gerri inquired mockingly. “You’re being so fucking obsessive and weird.”

You were silent as her words sunk in, and soon all you could do was internalise her accusations, her bitter words that told you nothing but that you had been the odd one all along. You had come expecting something that you wouldn’t have ever gotten, all because you couldn’t understand the months you’d spent away from Gerri really did change things. 

Were you so dim-witted and excessive that it took being yelled at, pushing Gerri until she was at her wit’s end, to finally understand?

To finally understand that things… weren’t going to be the same anymore.

“What?” Gerri urged you for a response. 

There must’ve been some kind of expression on your face, a concerning one, for Gerri’s face untensed a little as she looked at you. She said your name. 

You watched the way her lips moved around each syllable but you couldn’t hear it. But you wished you could, because you weren’t sure of the next time you’d ever hear her say it again.

Whatever functioning part of your brain forced your body to work on autopilot you hurriedly gathered your thoughts together to internally thank, because before you knew it you were rounding Gerri and pushing through the mess of people that you just couldn’t seem to get away from. 

Gerri’s voice called out from behind you and you thought she was calling your name again, over and over, maybe even trailing behind you as she made an attempt to follow you out to wherever you were going.

But you weren’t sure where you were going. 

All that you knew was that you needed to leave. 

The calling of your name meshed with the sounds of blasting music and shrill laughter and incessant chatter allowed you to forget for just a moment what your name was. 

What did it sound like in Gerri’s mouth? What did she look like saying it? 

Pushing through the crowd, bodies brushing up against yours and nearly asphyxiating you should it not have been for the way you forcefully pushed them out of the way, you almost forgot you had your own — a body — and your mind moved to think about what it felt like to have Gerri touch yours, what it felt like to feel her shoulder brush against yours all those times you slept in the same bed as her like that first night at her place.

It became especially hard to breathe and you feared what would happen if you collapsed just inches from the door, but your hand reached the doorknob just in time and you stepped out onto the porch.

The cold air burned your lungs when you inhaled but it dried your cheeks, and you regained feeling in your body only for you to realise that everything hurt.

Your chest was tight and your throat was sore, your lungs felt like they were constricting and your limbs felt like they might detach from their sockets at any second. And that fucking thrumming against your ribcage made you want to rip your heart out of your chest.

As if clawing your way through to your beating heart, you scratched at your chest through your shirt and felt with the tips of your fingers the pendant of a necklace Gerri gave you three summers ago that you couldn’t remember why you wore out tonight.

Pulling your shirt down just enough to reach it, you wrapped your fingers around the thin silver chain and tugged it down firmly, forcing the clasp in the back to snap. You eyed the pendant for a second or two, looking at it laying in the centre of your palm.

She bought it for you because it looked scarily similar to the small seashell you brought her when you came back from your trip to Malta a few months prior. 

You couldn’t remember if you’d told her, but you brought it back for her because it reminded you so much of her eye colour.

A voice called Gerri’s name from inside and you’re reined back down to earth. You step off of the porch and toss the necklace along with the pendant into a nearby bush, feeling like you abhorred the childish memories you realised you had been clinging onto for years.

“Gerri!” the voice raised.

She turned her head, forced to abandon the endeavour to find out where you had run off to. “Wh… What?” she stuttered, looking over to the beer pong table in the middle of the living room where someone had pulled her towards.

One of her other friends raised his eyebrows at her expectantly. 

“Come on, it’s your turn,” David urged, lifting a small white plastic ball to her.

Zoey let you into the dorm albeit feeling irritated because she’d come home early from the party to have some time alone with her boyfriend. You promised her that you’d be quick. 

You felt a compelling urge to take one more look at Gerri’s guitar stashed in the back of her closet, so you did.

The stickers on its case, memories of listening to her play for hours, the dedication and love she used to put into learning it, a song she’d learned for you once on your birthday as a surprise played on that very guitar, all shrouded and hidden away. 

You closed the closet and left for the station.

For a moment you considered texting Gerri that you were leaving then recalled that she’d never given you the kindness to know where she was or when she was returning nor if or when she was leaving at all. 

The bus took you to the station and you tucked your phone in your pocket. It took a few minutes in line to buy a new ticket and then in half an hour you’d be well on your way back home.

There was nothing for you here, and you should’ve realised it long before tonight. 

“Y/N!” a voice suddenly called from behind and you turned instinctively to see Gerri running up to you, looking dishevelled and out of breath. 

“How did you know I’d be here?” you intoned after she stopped in front of you and caught her breath. 

Gerri hesitated a moment before saying hastily, “Uh, Winona. I asked Sam to call her. I-I thought you might be with her but she told me that you said something tonight about missing home.”

“You swim here?” you asked, looking at the state of her hair.

As if just then gaining self-awareness, she ran her fingers through her hair and brushed it back behind her ears. “No,” she breathed out with a little laugh. “It started raining and the streetcar would only take me until a few blocks down, and I didn’t want to wait for the next one because I thought it’d be too late.”

She was rambling. 

It used to be endearing, but now it sounded sorta stupid.

Everything seemed pretty stupid right now — even you.

Then she waited for you to say something in response, but you had nothing to say.

She raised her hand to show you the necklace you had thrown away earlier dangling from her fingers, the silver seashell pendant hanging from the end. 

“You dropped this,” she said, still panting slightly. The words sounded optimistic as she wasn’t entirely sure if you purposefully discarded it or accidentally lost it.

“Keep it,” you told her.

Gerri’s arm retracted and she laid the necklace in her other palm. Her actions were slow and it seemed that she was trying to make time for her to say something before she put the necklace away, but although her lips parted and her eyes flickered up a few times to look at you, she said nothing. Carefully, she slid the necklace into her jacket pocket. 

“I thought you had your departure ticket booked for tomorrow night,” she thought aloud, evidently stalling as she tried to come up with something useful to say. She looked up from her pocket to you and ran her hands down her coat nervously.

“Bought another one so I could leave early.”

Having it spoken out loud, putting it out there verbally that you were leaving early, planted a feeling of alarm in Gerri’s chest. She inhaled sharply and stepped towards you. She opened her mouth to say something, but the station’s speakers announced that your train was to leave within the next ten minutes.

Adjusting the strap of your backpack up your shoulder, you said, “I have to go.”

“O… Okay,” Gerri replied, stepping back so you could turn and wheel your luggage behind you. “Safe trip. Have one, I mean.”

The escalator down to Platform Five was just ahead, becoming closer with each of your steps, and you traced your path from the last time you were at the station. Recalling it pained you slightly as you thought back to how hopeful and eager you had been when you stepped off the train last week.

You expected so much — too much.

So much had changed since then, and it was only a week ago.

How hadn’t you realised how grave a few months’ difference could make until just an hour ago?

You felt so stupid. Everything felt so… stupid. 

Your face was hot and you were boiling in your jacket. Your bag was too heavy and your luggage was hurting your wrist. Then tears were forming in your eyes and you raised your other hand to wipe at your eyes. 

The rapid clicking of padding shoes echoed behind you and before you could look back, your wrist was taken and pulled back, forcing you to turn and drop your luggage. A hand came to the back of your head and in spite of how quick it all was, her hands were soft and her caresses were careful.

An arm rounded your waist and your body was pulled against Gerri’s.

Her lips were suddenly pressed against yours and you smelled a whiff of her perfume, now having faded away throughout the night. But you could smell it clearly now that you were pressed up against her, and she wouldn’t let any space come between the two of you. 

Like last summer and all the summers before, all the years spent knowing Gerri as your closest friend and your greatest love, you were swathed in her as if her scent and the feeling of her body, the feeling of her lips, were a warm blanket.

When your lips parted from hers, green eyes flickered down your face and Gerri whispered, “Why are you crying?”

You looked away from her and quickly swiped at your eyes.

Keeping her other arm around your waist, she raised her hand to your face and swatted your hands away so she could wipe your tears for you. She kissed your damp cheeks and seemed to not be able to get enough of feeling your skin against her lips, so she kept kissing you.

You turned your head and Gerri stopped kissing you to tilt her head and keep her eyes on yours. It didn’t seem like you wanted to talk. It didn’t seem like you knew what you wanted to say much less how you felt.

So she started talking instead.

She started with: “I’m sorry.”

It didn’t look like you believed her, so she cupped your cheek and made you look at her.  

“Y/N, I’m sorry,” she repeated.

You were looking into her eyes now and she had your attention, but you were silent. You were waiting for her to say something more, and she had a lot to say. She didn’t know how to start it all, so she just dove into it.

“I, um… I used to see you every day, and it became hard to be here without you. I had to make — force — a different version of myself to blend in with these assholes. It was easier than missing you. It was easier than…” She trailed off and you wondered if she’d give up and just let you leave. 

In spite of how confidently she spoke, her fingers tightened around your waist and you felt how nervous she was. Her hand moved down your wrist and her fingers danced anxiously against your palm.

But she continued. 

“It was easier than admitting to myself that I was in love with my best friend. That I am in love with my best friend,” she finally said, exhaling deeply, her breath trembling. She looked away from you and over at the floor behind you.

You followed her eyes to survey the sincerity of what she was saying. It seemed true. It all seemed true. It felt true.

Then she took a breath and met your eyes again.

“I thought that maybe I just needed to grow up — to realise that I couldn’t be that same old small-town girl who’s never gotten shit-faced drunk or who’s never had sex with a guy,” she tried to explain. 

She was stuttering a little. 

“I mean, god, Y/N, the people here are fucking crazy. But I don’t enjoy it. Not even a little. I hate being around people I don’t know — people I don’t like. I don’t want to have sex with guys.” Then she scoffed and in a quick drop of her hand that seemed the slightest bit subconscious, she took your hand. “I don’t even like guys. I mean, I don’t think I do. Or at least the ones here. I don’t know.”

Gerri’s breathing became quick and you could see that she was trying not to look away from you. “Why aren’t you saying anything? Please say something,” she pleaded.

Your lips parted and you were going to say something, you were, but Gerri suddenly blurted out, “I want to be your girlfriend. And I wanna kiss you again.” She leaned down and kissed your chin.

“I want to be able to kiss you there,” she whispered.

She kissed your cheeks and your temples.

“I want to kiss you here.”

Your knuckles were lifted up to her lips and she kissed each of your five fingers, looking into your eyes. Then she lowered your hand and leaned forward to kiss your lips again. “And here,” she breathed against you. “I want to kiss you here. Again. Whenever I want to. Whenever you want to.”

An announcement came onto the speakers.

Five minutes left until the train was to leave.

The announcement reined you back down to earth and you looked around at the people passing, rushing to their trains, children in-hand, perhaps meeting their families elsewhere, going to meetings.

Everyone else — where were they off to?

“Am I too late…?” Gerri whispered.

You looked back over to her. 

Everyone else… 

Did it matter? Nothing else mattered when you were with Gerri. Nothing else ever mattered when you were with her.

You shook your head and uttered a soft, “I love you too, Gerri.”

“Y/N…” she said quietly. “Things won’t be the same. If we break up, if we fight. Even if we’re together until we’re old, things will change. And between us, it’ll be different.”

“No, it’ll be just the same,” you finally replied. “It’ll always just be you and me. That isn’t any different from how it’s always been, right?”

Gerri let out a noise that sounded like a laugh or some kind of relieved exhale and she let go of your hand and wrapped her arms around your shoulders. She started apologising again and again for how she’d been treating you, for how stupid she was acting.

In half-intelligible teary words, she said she wished it could just be you and her again like it was last summer and all the other summers before. She hated how much she’d changed while you were gone.

Your bag slipped from your arm and you hugged her back, letting her cry into your shoulder in the middle of the train station. “I miss it all so much too, Gerri,” you confessed. “I’ve missed you so much.”

Then you started crying, and Jesus, did that make you feel like an idiot.

“I really hate Winona,” Gerri confessed and hugged you tighter, which made you laugh like an idiot too. 

Some things just don’t change.

And that felt good.

[gingiesworld]

Unexpected Christmas

Gerri Fields x GN! Reader

Warnings: Fluff

Taglist : @natashamaximoff-69 @canvascoloredin @wizardofstories @louxbloom @wandanats-goodgirl @the-ox-fan20 @ladyqueenxoxo @aemilia19 @wandaromamoff69 @mfd-101 @dorabledewdroop @marvelogic @dopeyouth @karsonromanoff

18+ MINORS DNI

As Christmas break was fast approaching, Gerri’s parents had been pressuring her to tell them about her love life, asking if she had any suitors and if whoever it was would come with her for Christmas. So that was how Gerri ended up pleading with Y/N in their dorm room.

“Please, they will not give up until I bring someone home with me.” Gerri begged as Y/N sighed.

“You could always just not go home.” They suggested as she shook her head. “What’s one christmas? Tell them you have a shit ton of work to get through before the next semester starts.”

“No!” She threw herself on their bed, looking up at them with her puppy dog eyes. “Please just come with me, you’re not doing anything for christmas so it could be fun for you.”

“Well, they might tell me some embarrassing stories of a younger Gerri Fields.” They teased as she swatted their chest, making them laugh at her cute pout. “Fine, I’ll come with you.”

“Thank you.” She jumped on them, wrapping her arms around their neck as she smothered their face in playful kisses, although they knew she would never see them as they saw her, it never stopped the butterflies erupting in their stomach.

Y/N was extremely nervous as they drove to Gerri’s childhood home, listening as she sang along to the radio.

“Don’t you forget about me.” She sang along to her favourite Simple Minds hit as they smiled. “I’ll be alone, dancing, you know it baby.”

“How far are we?” They asked her as they interrupted her performance.

“Only around 10 minutes now.” She told them as she smiled at the streets she grew up on, a sense of peace filling her until they pulled up outside of her parents house. “So, we know the story about us?” She questioned as they nodded.

“We’ll pull through this, ok?” They reassured her as they took her hand in theirs, a gentle smile on their face as she took a deep calming breath.

“Let’s do this.” She told them as they got out of the car, rushing to her side and opening the door. “You didn’t have to.” She told them as they smiled, leaning in to whisper in her ear.

“You want me to pretend right, this is me when I am in a relationship.” They told her as she blushed lightly, feeling their lips press against her skin. She watched as they soon got their bags from the trunk before leading them to the door. Sighing before she unlocked the door and being pressed by her parents.

“Mom, Dad, this is Y/N.” She introduced them as they shook both of her parents' hands.

“It’s nice to meet you both, Gerri has told me so much about you.” They told them with their charming smile.

“Go and put your bags in your room, and come and have some tea.” Kate told them both as the two nodded, they watched as Y/N carried all of the bags as they followed Gerri up the stairs. Once they were inside, she closed the door and sighed loudly, causing Y/N to look at her.

“What’s wrong?” They asked her softly as she shook her head.

“This was a stupid idea.” She whispered as they gave her a gentle smile. “A fucking bad idea.”

“Hey, we will get through this.” They told her softly as she just nodded. “Ok, I won’t leave you.” They reassured her before pulling her in for a hug.

Once the two had joined Kate and Danny in the living room, Y/N held Gerri’s hand on their own.

“So, how did you two meet?” Danny asked as he gestured between the two of them.

“College.” The two answered in unison.

“We were paired for a project on our music course and we did a number.” Gerri started.

“So you play guitar?” He cut in as he pointed at Y/N.

“I do sir, and the piano.” They answered him.

“Double threat.” Kate mumbled to Danny who hid his smile. “So tell us about your family.” Kate asked them as Gerri glared at her mom.

“You don’t have to.” Gerri told them as they gave her a small smile.

“It’s ok.” They reassured her. “My parents died while I was just starting high school, my brother and I were put into the system and well, I don’t know where he is right now since they split us up.”

“I’m so sorry.” Danny spoke sincerely. “We didn’t mean to pry.”

“It’s ok.” They shook their head. “You want to know the person who is possibly going to be Gerri’s life partner, it’s completely understandable.”

“Why don’t you two go and relax while Danny and I start on dinner.” Kate told them as Gerri decided to drag Y/N out of the house for a walk around the neighborhood.

“I’m so sorry about that.” Gerri started as she walked beside Y/N. Soon stopping when they held her hand.

“It’s ok.” They told her. “They just wanted to know the person who they let into their home.”

“But.” She tried as they shook their head.

“It’s fine.” They told her before they continued their walk. Gerri telling them as much as she could about her childhood and growing up.

Christmas Eve, Y/N was helping Danny cook hot dogs and burgers on the grill, the two just conversing before he decided to ask them a serious question.

“Do you see a future with my daughter?” He asked them as they nodded.

“I do, sir.” They answered him honestly. “From the moment I first saw her, I knew that I needed to know her, be her friend and maybe be her everything if she would let me.”

“You love her.” He observed as they nodded, feeling relief as they spoke their true feelings.

“I do, I guess it’s from the moment I looked into her eyes and heard her laugh for the first time.” They told him.

“Have you told her?” He asked them as they shook their head no. “You should tell her. You only live once.”

“Y/N, can you help me?” Gerri popped her head outside which they just nodded, following her out onto the front porch.

“What’s up?” They asked her as she closed the door.

“I heard.” She spoke shakily. “Everything you just said, did you mean it?” She asked them as they remained silent. “I need to know if you meant it or if it was all pretend.”

“I meant it.” They told her. “I meant every word Gerri. You’re my best friend and I have been in love with you for as long as I can remember.” They sighed as they took a nervous step closer. “I guess everyday that I have spent with you has made me fall more and more.”

Gerri stepped before them, cupping their face as she looked up into their eyes. Slowly leaning in before she spoke.

“I love you too.” She told them before closing the gap, kissing them intensely as their arms wrapped around her waist. The two finally felt at peace and neither needing to dance around their feelings.

[wandabear]

SAY YOU'LL REMEMBER ME - GERRI (Very Good Girls) X F!READER

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Summary: this is a request from my freeen @imnotasuperhero 🐝 We talked about this fic with the recent photos of Lizzie at the Academy Awards, I've been working on it. She's a goddess.

Wanda rests today, today it's Gerri's turn. If you didn't see the movie 'Very Good Girls', well, you'll be spoiled for a bit. I was listening to 'Wildest dreams' a lot too.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤSay you'll remember me.

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The flashes were getting more constant. And even though she was used to it, Gerri blinked so it wouldn't make her dizzy.

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She hardly remembered how life was like without being recognized in each place she visited, just being 'Gerri', the girl full of dreams and an overwhelming innocence.

The blonde remembered her dad, who surely would have been so proud, cheering in some corner of the room ‘that's my daughter!’. Or telling random stories to her friends or even to journalists. Oh, how much she would give to hear those stories again. To see him again.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Gerri lowered her gaze, allowing the photographers to take that perfect side of her face. With soft makeup, her blond hair tied up and an elegant black dress, she posed for each of the photographers at that event.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Gerri, please, here!”

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“Gerri, you look beautiful!” One of the photographers rushed to take many shots of her. “Do you think your song is the winner? Your role in the film was exceptional!”

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“Thank you.” The blonde whispered smiling, trying to look good. Although filming and recording of the song eaten up almost an entire year of her life, where she had barely been able to see her mom or her best friends. At least it was worth it.

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The actress decided to go on her way with her ‘date’ when she heard a female voice call her. A voice she hadn't heard in a long time.

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“Gerri, could you pose one more time for a friend?”

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For a friend.

Gerri turned quickly to see her there, among the photographers, Y/N was holding a camera and showed the most adorable smile. She changed, of course, many years have passed since they last spoke. Gerri was a girl who played the guitar in random coffee shops or bars, looking to be heard by a good producer. And Y/N… well. Now she looked grown up, even though she was still looking good as always.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

After so long, that smile was still as charming as ever.

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“Y/N…” She gasped. “What are you doing here?”

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“Working, of course.” Y/N joked. “Vanity Fair this time. Would you pose for me, Ms. Fields?”

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“Of course.” It was all she could say, those green eyes shone with excitement when she saw her again. Y/N.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Y/N took advantage of the seconds she had and took many shots in different ways, this time all the pictures came out with a sincere smile and not a fake one for the cameras.

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“They’re definitely the best. Don't you think?” Y/N told her showing the result on the screen. And though she'd had many photoshoots taken in her career, Gerri hadn't seen prettier photos than this one. Like I could get to know her through photography, it was wonderful.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Surprised and happy, Gerri nodded. “They are beautiful, thank you.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“You’re welcome.” Y/N nodded, they both looked into each other's eyes for a moment, not knowing what to say. To be honest, the look said it all.

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“Gerri, we have to keep going.” The man brought her out of that daydream. She finally remembered that they should go to their respective seats to witness the awards.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Wishing you hold that gold, and all the joy your heart can hold tonight. Take care, G.” The brunette winked at her, turned to walk away and take some pictures of the next star to hit the carpet.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Y-Yeah, you too.” Gerri stammered as she watched her walk away and whispered: “It was good to see you.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Ten years ago…

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

The sound of a ‘click’ made Gerri look up, once again her friend took advantage and shoot.  Y/N loved catching her distracted.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“You don't get tired of doing that, don’t you?” The girl shook her head, trying to remember the right chords of that song.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Never.” Y/N closed one eye to capture the moment but stopped, Gerri was giving her the middle finger. Smiling mischievously, Y/N snapped the photo anyway.

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“I must admit that I love your pictures, you capture something different in them.”

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“I know.” The brunette left the camera in her bag and watched how her friend closed her green eyes, settling fingers on the strings.

And those long fingers danced caressing the strings, the brunette clung to the instrument as if it were a life preserver. And it was, to be honest, it was. But she didn't know yet.

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‘Still hurts… Answer me, even if it hurts, tell me why… You knew all along what I never wanted to say'.  

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Gerri sang softly, lovingly -sometimes clumsily- playing those chords. And that made Y/N smile, the lessons she'd given her were working. Gerri was learning new chords from her, although she seemed to start flying alone and that made Y/N feel so proud.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“That's all I have for now.” Gerri bit her lower lip, setting the guitar aside. “What do you think?”

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“I think it's great, it's… looking really good on you. I love your voice... ” Y/N felt her heart pound as she realized that her words made Gerri smile. For the first time someone recognized her, Y/N didn't claim that she was doing something wrong or something bad, she was never mean to her. She was someone who just enjoyed her. That was always Y/N to her.  

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“I'm proud of you, G. You've come a long way.”

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“I couldn't have done it without you.” Gerri smiled tenderly at her. After all, Y/N was one of her friends.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Although her best friend was Lilly, Y/N had always been by her side. They met when Y/N's parents moved next to them, they were just ten years old and from there, they always visited each other.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“So…” Y/N leaned back in her seat. “How do you feel? Are you excited? You’re going to play at the bar soon.”

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“Nervous, yes.” The green-eyed girl bit her lower lip, her eyes twinkling at the possibility of success. “But I'm excited to do it.”

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Y/N watched her with devotion. “I'll be there to see you succeed.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Gerri nodded as they shared some snacks.

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“That's what I wanted to tell you...” A mischievous look lit up the girl's face. “Guess who's going to see me at the bar too?”

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Y/N raised an eyebrow. “Lilly?”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“No, you dummy… David!”  Gerri squealed with excitement, a  lovesick teenager. Disappointment kicked hard into Y/N's chest.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Oh.” Is that all she could say? Really wanted to fake more emotion but it was impossible. She was trying so hard.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“He’s so hot, dude!” The girl dropped back into her seat as if she completely melted for the boy.ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

A boy she met on the beach with Lilly, apparently he was selling ice cream and she was a bit grumpy. An asshole. But according to Gerri, ‘David’ was the living image of manly perfection. Blonde, tall, blue eyes.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Ugh.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“I see you’re… excited about him.” The dark-haired girl cleared her throat. “How's everything with David? have you been talking?”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Gerri rolled her eyes. “He's so nice, so tall, handsome as hell. A little taller than you I think! And you know what?! He's a photographer too!”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

The illusion could be seen not only in those green eyes and expressions, but also in her voice. Y/N felt pure envy.

She hated having to feel bummed out by her friend's happiness.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Wow, I think we have something in common.” Y/N smiled through the pain. It definitely wasn't the only thing they had in common, right?

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“He knows so much, so much knowledge, the kind that leaves you completely dumbfounded, I swear to you. You'll love him.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“I think so.” Y/N hesitated for a moment whether to continue with her questions or not. “How interested is he? Has he… done anything?”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Gerri frowned, confused. “What are you talking about?”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“I mean... you look so excited about him.” Y/N repeated again, swallowing. She definitely fell into a deep hole.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Yes, you already said that.” Gerri didn't seem any less annoyed. “What I don't understand is what you mean by that.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“What I mean is…” Y/N stammered nervously, licking her lips. “I see the illusion in your eyes, you’re always talking about him.  When you tell me that you are the one who always calls him, looking for him at the beach, asking him out, but…”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Y/N took a moment before keep going, she didn't want to hurt her friend. But what the hell, right? She must be honest.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Has he been looking for you? Has he called you? You've never told me anything about that.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Noticeably uncomfortable, Gerri pressed her lips together.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“I don't understand what it has to do with it. Why does he have to? I- I think that's a very 'macho' way of looking at it, Y/N. Why does it have to be the man who always leads the relationship?”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Relationship? That's what you have?”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“What kind of feminist are you?”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Gerri, for God's sake. That's not what I mean! It’s not about sexism and- Damn, I'm the most feminist woman you've ever met! But tell me the truth, has he shown interest in you? Is going to see you at the bar as a date or is it an invitation to hang out?”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Fuck you, Y/N.” The girl yelled angrily getting up from her seat.  “You're just jealous because I have a date, and you're not. You're not dating anyone!”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Why would I be jealous? Of that?! I don't even like guys! You're just making a fool of yourself!”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Then why the fuck are you bothering me?! Why the hell do you care if he searches for me or not?!”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Cause I'm tired of hearing about him!” Y/N finally exploded, rising to face her. “Because you deserve better! You deserve someone to be in love with you.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

She laughed wryly. “That's stupid!”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

"Of course it isn't!"

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Why do you hate him so much? You don't even know him!”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Gerri, shut up. It’s not about him! It’s why the fuck you think he deserves you.” Y/N released with all sincerity in her chest. Finally.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Gerri was speechless.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“You deserve to be called, to be heard, to be crazy about you so damn much just to go see you in that damn bar and see you succeed. Don’t you dare settle for ‘fine’! For 'he's hot as fuck', come on!”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Those green eyes filled with tears, and Y/N's voice trembled for a moment.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Y/N inhaled deeply, she was going to say it. She was going to finally speak. “You deserve someone who makes you feel like you've been struck by fucking lightning.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Gerri's lips parted, all this surprised her as if shewas hit by a derailed train. The love and devotion in Y/N eyes, was something she never considered. Oh, she now she understood so many things.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“You deserve everything in this life, G.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Y/N… you-”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Yeah, I’m- Umh, kinda bit crazy about you? Yeah.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Y/N swallowed and played with her fingers waiting for an answer, but the moment didn't get any less awkward. The crickets sound  was the answer she needed.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“I'm sorry.” Sad at having to hurt Y/N like that and also confused, Gerry took a deep breath. “I don't- I can’t see you that way, you're… you're my... You're Y/N. My best friend.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“No, that’s Lilly.” She laughed sadly. “I'm just your friend, but I don't see you like that.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“I'm sorry.” Gerri looked down and played with her many rings. “I don't want… I don't want to hurt you, Y/N. I'm… I really like David, and I can't stop thinking about him. And I think he’s into me.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“It’s okay.” Y/N nodded, she knew very well that this would be Gerri’s answer. She had never expected this to turn out well.  “I know that.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

There was silence for a moment, but if you paid attention you could hear Y/N's heart break. The sound of a car brought both of them back to reality.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Are we okay?”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Yes? No? Silence.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“I’ve to go now.” Y/N took a few steps back, grabbing her camera bag.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Yeah, I think so.” Gerri watched her friend walk away, and for some reason she felt something leave with Y/N. She was quick to say: “I'll see you on Saturday? At the bar?”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Of course…” Y/N nodded as she walked down the front steps of the house. She was about to come into her house but stopped, turning around for a moment.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Gerri?”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Yes?”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“May the most you wish for, be the least you get.  May you always have laughter to cheer you, those you love near you, and all your heart might desire.” She smiled at her a little sadly for the last time. “Remember this… I know you will do amazing and you will be famous someday.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

And with those last words, she entered her house with a decision on her mind.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Since that night, Y/N never called her again or even sent her a message. And even if Gerri wanted to look for her, Y/N just left her parents' house without even saying goodbye to her.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

‘So what? Gerri was very busy with her boy anyway’  Y/N thought.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Gerri didn't need her, Y/N was just good for listening. Gerri always had Lilly and the blonde would never leave her, Y/N was sure that ‘G’ would never be alone.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

But Y/N never found out that Gerri had been set up by Lilly, sleeping with David ever since they met.   They were best friends in love with the same boy. Apparently Lilly and David were in a relationship and they never told Gerri, even if she begged for the boy's attention.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ Gerri's dad died of a heart attack on the subway, and the girl was trying to deal with the loss. Not just her dad, but her crush and her friend too.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

But no one, ever again, took pictures of her in the same way again. Now no one saw her with illusion in her eyes when she played, now no one brought her favorite sweets and scented candles when she was feeling down.

Now no one had left a note with a song to cheer her up on her window, when it rained so hard because that made her feel sad.

Because Y/N knew that she would be fine without her.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤNOW

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

The 90's music, voices of people talking and the occasional drunken chatter was all you could hear. An endless number of celebrities had different conversations with each other in that exclusive place.

Variety's party after the awards ceremony was like a religion and those who attended were always touched by a magic wand.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Gerri needed to escape from the noise and people, taking that cocktail in her hands, she walked to the terrace. The fresh air will help clear her mind, or maybe smoking could help too.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“You look visibly affected. So much people in a place keep bugging you...”  

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

With a smile on her lips and a pint of beer in her hands, Y/N was watching her from a few steps away. Now she wore a black suit, a bit more formal than before.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Looking good. Not working this time?” Gerri smiled. The truth is that Y/N looked incredible.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“The party for the magazine I work for, means I get to party a bit. Your date left you alone with all these crazy people around you?” The brunette settled next to her, both of them leaning against the railing of the terrace.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“He's chatting with a music producer over there.” Gerri sighed and drank some of her cocktail.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Ha. Long ago, you would be so crazy about doing the same.” Y/N took a sip of her beer, thinking about the old days.  Nostalgia came to her faster than she thought.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Oh, yeah.” Gerri laughed. “We haven't seen each other in a long time. I never expected to see you here.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Well, my life has really changed a lot. Both of us, we're at a Variety party feets away from Salma Hayek, can you believe it? I went to get a snack and she told me ‘try this chilito mija, it's delicious'. It was a religious experience!” Y/N joked.

They laughed at how crazy that sounded, but it also showed how far they had come. That was the good part.  Separated from each other, that was the bad part.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“We've really come a long way.” Gerri whispered, surprised and a bit moved.

ㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Yeah…”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ Nostalgia hitting again.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“How?” The blonde turned to see her. “How have you been?”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Fine, I mean… After we just… After what happened that night I was…trying to put my life back together. Jules needed to get away from Boston, so we rented an apartment in Hell's Kitchen as roomies. Worked hard to buy my first camera.”  Y/N's eyes lit up as she remembered everything she'd been through. “I worked hard to get a place in a small newspaper, after that I covered a… well, never mind. What matters is that I got a shot at a magazine doing photoshoots and…here I am. At a after Academy’s party... with the great Gerri Fields. Actress and singer-songwriter.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Her chest swelled with pride as she said it, being able to see Gerri grow and achieve everything she had ever dreamed of.

She wasn't going to lie, Y/N had always been aware of how well she was doing. Beginning as a bar singer who happily appreciated if two people applauded her, write her own song that went viral so fast. Then her first dramatic film, acclaimed at festivals like Sundance and Cannes.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Of course she was so fucking proud of Gerri. And you could see it in Y/N’s eyes, which prompted Gerri to quickly say it:

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“I'm so sorry about what happened last time.” The blonde said embarrassed, quite guilty, as if she had been carrying that for a long time. “I was stupid.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Lowering her head, Y/N pressed her lips together. She was trying so hard to avoid thinking about it since she saw Gerri on the event red carpet. Hell, she tried to avoid it since she moved on and leave all that behind.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Gerri…”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“I mean it.” The blonde sighed deeply and took a drink of her cocktail. She wasn’t going to deny that despite being a wonderful night, the memories reached her. “I was young and dumb, and I just... And I hurt you, and I'm so sorry. I didn't even look for you.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Guilt showed in those big green eyes.

Y/N sighed, wasn't going to deny the pain she'd felt when Gerri hadn't even tried to find her. But it was also a great opportunity to let go of the pain, to understand that Gerri didn't appreciate her in the same way.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“That was in the past.” The brunette admitted. She wasn't trying to say it to make Gerri feel better or not to get into a debate, she was telling the truth. All of that was long gone, ten years ago. She smiled at the blonde with genuine tenderness. “I'm glad to see you've succeeded.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“You always said that I would.” Gerri smiled back. “You always believed in me.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Those words left her lips like a gasp.

The connection between them was so strong that no one paid attention, nor to the music, nor to the people around them.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Hey.” A bearded man approached them, holding a fancy cocktail in his hand. It was her date, of course Gerri Fields wasn't going to go alone to an event like that. “I was looking for you, someone wants to meet you.”

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Oh, hey…” The blonde barely got to say, a bit disappointed that the man broke into their moment. She realized how much she missed Y/N.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Well, I think it's time to let you back into your life. I'm going to rest, the party life exhausts me a bit and I have to send the pics asap.”  Y/N smiled at both of them, ready to leave. Although she wanted to have more time with her ex-friend, it was best to keep going. Keep going and not stop to look back, that's why she had survived so long.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

There was sadness in Gerri's eyes, but she just nodded quickly, moving to stand beside him.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“Yes, of course.” Gerri nodded quickly, somewhat embarrassed.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“See you later, G.”  Winking at her, the brunette walked away to get lost among the people.  Gerri watched as Y/N walked past some celebrities, many waving at her happily. As if they loved her.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Who didn't love her? She was always an incredible person with a huge heart.

Only a fool could reject her.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

“See you…” Gerri whispered to herself.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

I hope you liked it! Did u spotted a Ted Lasso quote over there? Blame that amazing moment, i had to use it. I didn't know if it was Gerri or Gerry, but the movie credits list her as Gerri. So…

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

Yes, this will have a next chapter. Longer, a slowburrrrrn. 🐻 I’m working on the next chapters of ‘Another Word’, ‘Where are you now?’ and some Leigh oneshots like a 'SUNFLOWER' prequel.

If you want to be tagged, let me know in a comment below.

ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ ㅤ

the cutest and lovely people tags ✨: @imnotasuperhero @scarletwitchofthewilds @katiemay-025 @is-mise-rachel

[dollsome-does-tumblr]

Listened to J. Smith-Cameron’s interview on the podcast The Back Room with Andy Ostroy and there were a few RomanGerri bits in about the last 10 minutes, transcribed below!

JSC: “And then I remember [Jesse Armstrong, at the start of filming season four] saying in terms of the arc of the Roman/Gerri story that he makes this sort of spectacle of himself in his grief at the funeral and that then, though, Gerri and he have a poignant scene where Gerri tries to be nice to him, and that scene didn’t make it into the cut.”

the fact that this was literally the big thing jesse armstrong told her about roman and gerri’s arc at the start of the season .......... and then it got cut out ............ cool cool cool ... my supervillain origin story grows ever deeper ....... (i feel grimly validated in my season-long sense that the scene in 4.03 where she refused to comfort him was always supposed to eventually be bookended with a scene where she did, tho. 🥲😢)

and then this bit was in a lightning round where he asked her about how she thinks various facets of the show would go after the ending!

Andy Ostroy: “Do Gerri and Roman have any kind of sexual interaction again?” JSC: (pause; then, firmly) “Yes. I think so.” Andy Ostroy: “Good answer.”

good answer INDEED 💗

[wandagcre]

can't stop thinking about lizzie as gerri fields rn 😵‍💫 might post a series soon!

(also how do i make sapphic tumblr friends? ahhh pls send an ask, let's talk <3)

[abbyromanoff]

WANDA MAXIMOFF MASTERLIST:

WHO I WILL WRITE FOR: Elizabeth Olsen, Wanda Maximoff (MCU), Jane Banner (Wind River), Therese (In Secret), Elle Brody (Godzilla), Leigh Shaw (Sorry For Your Loss), Taylor Sloane (Ingrid Goes West), Gerry (Very Good Girls)

Next Door Hottie (smut, small angst)

Mommy (smut, fluff)

My Wives (smut)

Assistance (smut, angst)

Obsessed (smut)

My Girl (smut, small angst/fluff)

Daddy Knows Best (smut)

Here To Help (smut, fluff)

My Love.. (smut, fluff)

Disobedience (smut)

A Guest (smut)

Two Is Better Than One (smut)

A Deal Is A Deal (smut)

Try It (smut, small angst)

Yours Again (smut, angst)

The Phone Call (smut)

Too Late (angst)

Pierced (smut)

Anywhere Anytime (smut)

Mommy’s Day (smut, fluff)

Keep Going (small smut, angst, comfort)

The Lucky Winner (smut)

The Keeper Of Her Cold, Wretched heart (angst, smut)

Closer (smut, fluff)

Sweater Weather (smut, fluff)

Mother Natures Tears And Fears (angst, fluff, comfort)

Lost In The Pleasure (smut, fluff)

Can’t Help Falling In Love (fluff)

Taste Of Desire (smut)

Cruel Girl (smut, dark)

Follow My Lead (smut)

Eyes Don’t Lie (smut)

You’ll Always Be Mine (angst, dark!!)

Hate Me? Or Love Me? (angst, smut, fluff) (Jane Banner)

Bunny (smut)

Visions (angst, fluff)

Older (smut)

You Deserve Better Than That (angst, fluff)

Attention-Seeker (angst, fluff)

Pick Or Choose (angst, fluff) (Lizzie)

Drunk In Love (fluff) (Lizzie)

…Hate Me (angst, fluff)

Someone New (But I Still Love You)

You Are Loved… (fluff, angst) (Elizabeth Olsen)

Spider-Woman!Wanda (fluff, smut)

[netherfeildren]

Someone's Wife in the Boat of Someone's Husband .9

Series Masterlist : Moodboard

(Joel Miller x F!Reader)

Content Warnings: Slight daddy kink; EXTREME domestic fluff

Rating: Explicit 18+

A/N: Thank you for reading, I love you all so much :')

Artwork is Moonlight Over the Ocean by Marianna Foster

Word Count: 5.7K

Read on AO3

.9

Time passes. Memory fades, memory adjusts, memory conforms to what we think we remember.

Joan Didion, Blue Nights 

You sit at the kitchen table the next morning, and he watches as you peel an orange, separate it into perfect slices, and then reach over, palm up, with half of it presented to him. You eat your individual halves staring at each other, silly and smiling and too happy for words, swallowing slice by slice in silence. And tasting the same thing together, in this instance, means more to him than all that’s come before, and at the same time, is just one more moment, in a sea of moments, where he can only thank you for existing, for allowing him to exist alongside you. It hits him suddenly, bright and enormous as the blue sky, that you’re a gift, like the orange, a gift. 

-

His phone rings as he’s shoveling the cheesy scrambled eggs you’d made him into his mouth. Half a dozen eggs and you don’t think it’s enough – are already planning on sticking some cinnamon rolls in the oven for him to devour, as well. Big man, big appetite, and it’s a little ridiculous, but the thought of being able to feed him and take care of him fills you with the most unadulterated of fizzy pleasures, deep in your belly. 

“Eat, little girl,” he takes a breath to order.

All you can do is sigh and hum a murmur of acquiescence as you continue to watch him, chin cupped in your palm. That dignity you’d tried to remember last night is clear out the door by now. You really couldn’t seem to find it in yourself to care. 

As you watch him take the call, you can hear the tinny, muffled sound of Tommy’s voice resonating against his ear. “Sorry to interrupt, brother, but Ger’s coming down with somethin’ – she was up sick all night. Thinking I should bring her home–”

Joel clears his throat, sets his fork down, already looking towards you, “Yeah– yeah, of course. I’ll leave now – meet you there.” He hangs up the call, “Gerri’s sick – Sarah needs me home.” He moves to stand and you follow his lead.

“Of course, go–”

“Will– will you come?” he asks a little hesitantly, a wash of boyish-shyness coloring his cheeks, “She asks for you all the time…”

“I– of course, I will, baby…” you reach out to clasp his hand in yours, “But you don’t think it’s too soon? Or– I don’t know…”

“She already knows you. She loves you.” He drags his thumb over the wing of your cheekbone, and his eyes flare with heat for just a second, “And we can be good,” but this thing between the two of you feels so wholly uncontrollable, that you aren’t sure that’s true. 

You press your chest up against his, nuzzle the whiskers under his chin, “If we try very hard, I suppose we can…” He laughs, wrapping his arm around your waist to squeeze you against him.

“Behave.”

You sigh into his skin, run your hands down the hard contours of him, “Yeah– yes, alright, I’ll go with you.”

-

“Daddy, pancakes!” She runs circles around him, as quick and excited as a little buzzing bee.

“Pancakes? What about some fruit? Oatmeal?”

She pauses her racing, “Daddy, I hate fruit and I hate oatmeal,” she says very seriously. 

“Christ,” he looks to you and rolls his eyes, but he’s smiling. He’s happy. He’s so happy, you can see it shimmer off him.

“Silly, daddy,” you whisper at him coyly, “Don’t you know everyone hates oatmeal?”

The sound of you calling him that wipes the smirk off his face, “Behave,” he tells you with mock severity. You turn to Sarah, sticking your tongue out at her, boring, you whisper. She’s nodding her head so hard her curls bounce up and down, huge, goofy smile stretched across her little face. 

He turns back to Sarah who’s now hanging off his arm and singing, at the top of her lungs, what you’re pretty sure is her own rendition of What’s Up? by the 4 Non Blondes, “Yo, lady, since when do we hate fruit?” He flexes his thick bicep to curl his arm up while she hangs from the bend of his elbow like a monkey. 

“Since I want pancakes,” she beams, and in the same breath turns to you, “Do you want to see my bat?” 

“A baseball bat or a real bat?”

“A Bob bat.”

“A Bob bat?”

“Yes, my Dad bought him for me.” You turn to give him a skeptical look, and he rolls his eyes and shakes his head, turning to the fridge. 

“I’ll bring it!” And she runs off, resuming her nineties serenade. 

“You see what I gotta fuckin’ deal with,” he whispers as he comes over to lean down over you and grip you by the jaw. He forces his fingers between your molars over the skin of your cheeks so that he can wedge your jaw open, and you just sit there, open mouthed, panting up at him, caught in his hold, “And then I gotta deal with you misbehaving too…” There’s fire in his eyes. You scrunch your nose at him, you never misbehave. You try to make a tiny whimper of objection, but he doesn’t give you the chance to defend yourself. He closes the distance between you for an open mouthed kiss, just like that, licking hot and wet into you, so that you’re left aching for him. 

She charges back into the kitchen at full speed just as he’s pulling away. An honest to God, real life, taxidermied bat, covered in pink and purple, sparkly My Little Pony Stickers and glue on rhinestones. She slams the thing down onto the table and beams up at you, wide and gap toothed and eternally proud. 

You turn to him, arching a brow, “You bought this for her?”

He throws his hands up, “I’ve been tryna tell ya – weird kid.”

Sarah pets the top of the things lightly furred, slightly revolting head – the most loving look in her gaze, “Isn’t he pretty?” she croons. “His name is Bob.” And she’s so goddamned pleased, you break out into hysterical giggles. 

“Kinda looks like Tommy, don’t’cha think?” Joel snickers. 

Afterwards, he moves around the kitchen, making her pancakes while she sits on his foot, skinny arms and legs wrapped around his calf, clinging like a sloth, belting out a rendition of Shania Twain now, for the entire house to enjoy. He’s so patient, so loving and goofy with her. He lets her be a little girl, he accompanies her in her childhood, gently holding her hand and guiding her and laughing with her through her innocent silliness. He enjoys her childhood alongside her in a way you don’t think you’ve ever seen a parent do. You watch them together, and it makes you want to cry. 

It makes you wonder, quite desperately, what it would be like for you to have a child of his. 

-

“Will you play Barbies with me?” she asks shyly. The pancakes have been eaten, and you’re sitting at the breakfast table, chin cupped in your palm, watching him clean up the kitchen after having been ordered to sit and not move. Stubborn, broad, gorgeous man. You watch the muscles in his back shift beneath his t-shirt, it has your mouth going a little dry, and you feel so warm and full of everything he makes you feel. 

“‘Course I will.”

She leads you by her sweaty little hand out into the living room and pulls you down to sit on the floor in the center of the pink, plastic village she’s constructed. There are toy houses and cars and tiny little Barbie shoes, you’re sure Joel just loves stepping on with his bare feet early in the mornings, strewn all over the carpet – a right good Barbie village, if you’ve ever seen one. She pats your shoulder and then the top of your head as you settle on your bottom amidst the sprawling pink metropolis erected in the middle of his house.  

She sits in front of you. “We can’t play babies today because–” she pushes her floppy curls exasperatedly out of her face, “Because they’re all in jail right now,” she tells you very seriously. “But don’t worry, we can play babies next time you come.”

You nod in understanding, equally serious, “Alright. Why are the babies in jail?”

“Well,” she starts to spread out the dolls in front of the two of you, meticulously organizing them in some mysterious order you’ve not yet been let in on, “They were really bad.” She gives you a wide-eyed, conspiratorial look, “I caught them eating bugs, and I was going to leave them in jail forever, but Daddy said that was too mean.”

“You caught them eating bugs, or I caught you eating bugs?” Joel’s voice calls from the kitchen. 

She looks at you wide eyed and shocked as she shakes her head violently, “That’s not true, don’t believe him!”

“No eavesdropping!” you call, “This is a girl's conversation.” You wink at her, “Right, Sarah?”

“Yes, yes, just for girls, that’s right. No daddies.”

“Right.” She hands you the Barbie she’s chosen for you and presents you with the pink convertible she’s going to set them up in. 

“Do you like her dress? Purple is my favorite color. Daddy told me his favorite color is brown,” she sticks her tongue out, “But I told him brown’s an ugly color. I told him he– he should choose purple instead, like me.”

“Not true,” he shouts, “I told you, baby, it’s blue now.” Your cheeks flare bright hot at that. You hear his loud chuckle. 

“No’sdropping, Daddy!” Sarah yells back. Eavesdropping. “Girls only!” You catch his grumbling. 

“My favorite color’s green,” you say.

“Oh, I like green too. That’s my number two favorite color.”

“You have good taste.”

“I know,” completely serious. 

“Did you know my favorite movie is Thumbelina?”

“No, I didn’t know that. I love that movie too.” She hands you another Barbie, there are four different dolls clutched in your grasp now, and you’re worried you’ll run out of hand real estate soon. 

“It’s Daddy’s favorite too. He always watches it with me, but he told me not to tell anyone,” she whispers, “So you can’t tell him I told you.”

You nod solemnly, placing a Barbie over your heart, “I promise.”

She gets shy again, all of a sudden, fiddling with a big plastic lizard you don’t know where she pulled from amongst the sea of pink. You cock your head and try and give her the most patient and encouraging smile you can muster to help her get her words out, “Thank you for playing in the water with me the other day.” All that time ago at the lake, “I had a lot of fun.” Her voice is so small as she says it, and the backs of your eyes pinch at the sound of her uncertainty. Children never forget. And adults should always remember that.

She shows you the entirety of the doll collection after that. She has about fifty different Barbie dolls, and it’s extremely obvious that Joel is not even a little bit in charge here and entirely at her behest. He’s still clattering around in the kitchen, doing God knows what, and you so badly want to go in there and kiss him, tell him how good he is and how much you want him and love him. Sitting here, playing with his little girl, bearing witness to her happiness, to the happiness he’s so painstakingly built and protected for her, has your heart flipping and squeezing in your chest. 

“Your hair is pretty,” she says, reaching out to drag her fingers through the long strands. She scoots forward so that her nobby little knees are pressed up into your lap, and she has a better reach to touch your hair. 

“Thank you. So is yours,” you pet her hair back. She’s so sweet, so affectionate, just as easy to love as her father is. 

She beams at your compliment, “It is, right?” Humble too, you laugh. 

As she continues to drag her fingers through your hair, you can tell they’re still slightly sticky with syrup, she says, “Well, I was just wondering – well, you’re–” she sighs exasperatedly, as if she doesn’t know what words it is she wants to get out. You sit patiently, waiting for her to find what it is she wants to say,  “You’re my Daddy’s friend, right?”

“Yes… yes, we’re friends.”

“Best friends?”

“Well, I hope so. I would really like to be his best friend, yes.”

“So then– then if you’re best friends, then that means he won’t be sad, right? Best friends don’t make each other sad, right?”

Your heart pinches, sharp and painful,“No, sweet pea. I would never want to make him sad.” You drag the back of your knuckles over her baby soft cheek. 

“It’s just that sometimes I think Daddy gets sad. And then he doesn’t want to play, and I don’t like it.” Children notice everything, and they never forget. 

You cup her face in your hands gently, she’s still holding onto your hair on either side of your head. Her big green eyes are wide and solemn and somehow, wise beyond her years already. Eyes that notice too much. The eyes of a child who has, perhaps, seen things in her parents that she does not understand, but that she knows are not how they should be. “Sarah, I promise you. I will do everything I can to never make him sad. Okay?” You stick out your pinky so that she can hook her little one around yours. 

She nods, “Okay. Will you come to my birthday party? I’m turning four soon–” she holds up five fingers, “It’s going to be a bug party.” She beams. “But we can’t eat them. Daddy said. And we can be best friends, too, right?”

“I think we already are,” you whisper at her conspiratorially, bending your head to give her little nose a gentle rub with yours. Butterfly kiss, you whisper and her giggle is like the sound of spring wind chimes, infectious, the prettiest thing you’ve ever heard. 

When you look up, Joel’s standing at the mouth of the kitchen, leaning up against the doorframe, gentle smile painted across his face, thumb tucked into the waistband of his jeans. His gaze filled with everything you’ve always wanted to see in the eyes of someone you love. 

-

You and Sarah have been out in the backyard for hours. The game of Barbies now turned into dinosaurs and princesses, since it’s not warm enough for the pool and mermaids anymore. You’d changed into one of his ratty old sweatshirts and some shorts he works out in, the fabric swimming around you so that you’ve had to roll them up a bunch of times just to keep them around your hips. The neck of the sweater is too big on your shoulders, and it’s slipped down to expose the delicate wing of your clavicle and the strap of your bra. 

You’re so beautiful, playing and laughing with his daughter. Your messy hair loose and sweaty at the temples, and he fucking loves you so much. So much it’s a physical entity inside him, an ache, a coiling, ravenous thing that can only be filled and settled by your presence and your touch.

As soon as he puts Sarah down for her nap, which will be soon considering the way the two of you’ve been prancing around and howling like a pair of wild hyenas, he’s going to lock you in his room and fuck you into his mattress until you can’t walk, can’t even remember your own name. Until the only thing you know is him. 

He sidles up behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist to squeeze you into him while Sarah dances around the two of you, pressing a hot kiss to the sweat damp skin of your throat. With the arm banded across your belly he presses the tips of his fingers into your hip bone to tilt your ass into his lap, pressing the hard length of his erection into your softness.

“Be good,” you breathe, nodding along at whatever it is Sarah’s singing about. 

“I want to fuck you,” he whispers into the sensitive shell of your ear, feels the full body tremor at his words jitter through your limbs. 

He listens to your little whimper, savors it, “Behave–” 

“Can’t –” another kiss over the soft shell of your ear, whispered right into the small bowl, “You’re too pretty.”

“Joel–” Sarah starts to howl like a damn basset hound, having her own conversation with God knows who. You snicker.

“So much energy, lady,” he says to her.

She gallops around the two of you, singing Shania Twain at the top of her lungs, come on over, come on over, come on over, come on in, something incomprehensible, and then, “I’m so happy, Daddy!” The widest, cheesiest smile you’ve ever seen in your entire life. You feel his arms jerk around you, a muttered, fuck, and he buries his face in your shoulder for a moment. You feel the widening expanse of his chest taking deep breaths up against your back, and when he’s collected himself, when you’re sure he knows his voice won’t crack, he says, “Me too, baby girl.”

“Let’s all play princesses together,” she tugs on his shirt in the back, and then zooms off to her play house at the back of the yard, calling for the two of you to join her. 

“She needs so much,” he says, and you know, you can see it. Like all little girls, she needs so many things and deserves so many things, and she should have everything she needs and wants, and you know he will do everything in his power to give her all of it and more. 

“It’s a good thing she has you to give it all to her then.” He hums low in his throat at that, his chin propped up on your shoulder, watching her crawl in and out of her little house, rolling around in the grass like an overexcited bunny. He rubs his large palm over your belly. You laugh softly at the sight of her. Silly little girl. 

“She struggles so much making friends… I don’t know why. She’s so alone sometimes.”

You hum, tilting your head against his so that your temples are leaning on each other, “I did too, when I was a girl. I think it must be some sort of complex gained from having a… a difficult mother, I suppose we could call it.” He huffs a breath of laughter and turns his face in to press a kiss to the side of your neck. 

“I suppose…” he trails off, and is quiet for a beat, just watching her play. “You can’t imagine what it’s like having to–” another breath of laughter, this one more self deprecating, “To lug my ass over to all the whispering mother’s at her school, make nice and ingratiate myself, and ask if Sarah can be included in the play dates and birthday parties, and then having to evade the inevitable questions about why it’s only me they always see, asking if I’m single, where her mother is, why she never joins us.” 

Your heart twists for him, and you try and turn to face him, but he tightens his arms around you, keeping you in place. “You– you’ve asked them to include her?” Your voice cracks a little at the end, your eyes flutter shut, this man, this gorgeous, good, amazing man. 

“Of course I did. I had to. She wanted to go, and I know it’s hard for her, and the kids weren’t asking her themselves, little fuckers, so I had to go and get that invitation for her. And I damn well did. And then she hated it, after all that.” He laughs, “Had the mom calling me thirty minutes after I’d dropped her off at the kid’s birthday party – said Sarah wouldn’t stop crying and asking for me, and that she needed to be picked up. Shoulda never left her in the first place, but there were no other dads and I felt– I don’t know, so out of place and awkward and alone, and I was fucking selfish and stupid. But– I don’t know… I thought it was the right thing, that she’d enjoy herself, want to be there. I didn’t know what to do. I don’t know what to do.” He clicks his tongue, nuzzles his temple into yours while he watches his daughter, “But no… she just – struggles to socialize or somethin’. I don’t know how to fix it.” 

You turn in his arms now, tugging on his hands until he lets you, and wrap your arms around his neck, looking up at him. “We’ll figure something out,” you say and his eyes go tender and heated, all at once, his hand coming up to clasp the back of your neck. My sweet girl, he murmurs, and the two of you should, perhaps, be more restrained in front of Sarah, but it’s almost an impossibility, to be here with him and not touch him, to not let yourself fall into his arms. 

She charges up to the two of you then, “I want to hug too!” He laughs, swooping down to swing her up over his shoulders, “How about I play the dinosaur that hunts the pretty princess?” and there’s still that blazing fire in his eyes as he says it, staring right at you, the most brazen of looks on his face. Your belly flutters and flips. 

The three of you play in his backyard together for hours that afternoon. 

-

“Hi, daddy,” you whisper as you crawl up the length of his body, finally a moment alone together behind a locked door, hours later, pausing to press your face into his belly and nuzzle there. Sarah hadn’t let him do the bedtime routine, she’d wanted you. Had asked all about your art, and if the two of you could paint together, and if you could draw bugs for her, until she’d finally fallen asleep. 

He fists his hand in your hair and yanks your head up, “Don’t get yourself into something you can’t handle, little girl,” he rumbles. 

“I can handle it, promise,” you breathe, already panting for him.

He brings his hand up to cup the swinging weight of your breast, “Fuckin’ gorgeous,” he murmurs, “You want me to fuck you, baby?” Yes, yes you do. But you sigh and flop down on top of him.

“Yes,” you say into his chest, “But I should go home.”

“Not happening,” he says and braces his knee against your hip to roll you over and under him. “You’re staying here with us–” he presses a kiss to the underside of your jaw, down your neck to the dip of your throat. “Forever.”

“Joel–” you breathe, arching your neck to give him better access. The two of you’d said you were going to take it slow with Sarah, this doesn’t feel or sound like slow.

“I know– I don’t give a shit. I’ve been without you long enough.” He pushes his sweatshirt on you up your belly and over your breasts, rolling you slightly on your side to get at your bra clasp and deftly unhooking it with one hand, and then letting you settle back in place so that he can pull the cups down and latch his mouth onto your nipple. And oh, God, you can’t think when he’s got his mouth on you like this. “Don’t care if it’s too fast– I need you.”

“I need you too,” you whimper. He nips at the full, round side of your breast, runs his tongue underneath the crease of it, lifting it up to bring your nipple back into his mouth and flick his tongue, gentle and slow, over you.

“That sweet pussy wet and ready for me now?” 

“Yes, I want you.”

“Should we check?”

“Yes, please, please, check.” He sits back on his haunches, pulls his t-shirt up over the back of his head, and then pulls his shorts and your panties down off your hips, pulls your bra off the rest of the way so that you’re left wearing only his sweater. You spread your legs wide, displaying yourself for him, and run your fingers up his belly to scratch at his chest hair. He’s so thick and solid. So strong. He could do anything, anything he wants to you, and you’d let him. Maybe it’s not right, or– or very level headed, to want to give so much of yourself to him, but you can’t help it. He’s good and loving and kind and strong and responsible, and all the things you’d always wanted someone in your life to be, and he’s going to take care of you and Sarah, you know he is. If he’s going to give you so much, then it’s only right that you return it in equal measure. It’s who he is, a provider, a giver, and you’ve taken care of yourself for so long, been so alone for so long. The knowledge that now you can let all that go when you so choose to, and let him carry it all – nothing in your life has ever felt more comforting or secure than this right here does. 

“Look at this needy, messy cunt,” he croons. He presses his thumb to your clit and starts to swirl soft, gentle circles around the swollen nub, not yet giving it direct pressure. 

“Joel– no teasing, please. Not right now.” You need him, you need to feel the heavy weight of him inside you. He pauses to look into your eyes, and he must see all the desperation, all the need and want in your gaze because he feeds you two of his fingers at that. Swipes his thumb once, twice over your wet opening and then slowly starts to press his fingers inside.

“That better?” You nod, letting your eyes flutter shut and arching your back deeper to feel him more, spreading your legs as wide as you can. You hold on to his wrist and roll your hips against him. “Fuck, look at you–”

“You don’t understand–” you whisper, eyes still closed, you can’t look at him like this, so vulnerable, an unbearable flush of shyness suddenly spreading through your body. You roll your hips against his hand again, and he starts a slow circular pattern on your swollen clit. 

“What don’t I understand, baby?”

“You say you need me, but I– I need you so much,” you whisper. 

He hooks his fingers inside of you, right against that deeply sensitive, soul churning spot that belongs only to him. He leans over you, one arm braced beside your head to hold himself up, “I understand. I understand because I need you just as much, more, more than even that. More than you could ever understand.” He pulls his fingers from you and you hear the clink of his belt and the drag of his zipper, and then his hand is clamping around the bones of your jaw, fingers wet and sticky with your slick, smearing along your cheek, you feel the burning hot brush of his cockhead on the slope of your belly. He holds there for just a second, staring into your eyes. You’re not going to cry, not this time. 

“Joel–”

“I know,” he says, because he does, because he always has. He’s always known.

“I love you.”

“I know,” he leans down to press a soft kiss to your mouth, eyes open, still looking at you. “And I love you, and you know that too.”

“Yes– yes, I know.” You bracket his face with your own hands also, so that the both of you are now holding on to each other. You know because the two of you have always known each other in some way. His hand leaves your face to push his pants down, he kicks out of them, and bends once to lick a long swipe through your slit, groaning at your taste, and then he’s leaning between your legs again and gripping the base of his cock to press the head to your entrance.

Fuck me, fuck me, fuck me, please, please. I love you. 

He sinks to the hilt. 

“Say my name,” you tell him, and he whispers it, right into the soft shell of your ear, slides his hips in and out, slow and deep. “Again,” again, again, again. Never stop saying it, say it for the rest of your life. 

He slides his knees up the mattress so they’re shoved up under your thighs and his torso’s hunched over you as he drives his cock down deep into you, the head focused right at your cervix. It’s almost too much, it’s entirely not enough. 

I love you, I love you, I love you, breathed into your mouth. 

You shift your legs restlessly along his sides, pressing your heels into the base of his spine. You need more, it’s somehow not enough, you need– you need to look at him, to touch him more.

“Joel, wait–” you grip the bulging muscles of his shoulders.

“Lemme just give it to you, baby, let me, let me–”

“Please– please, please–”

“What– what is it?” he pulls back, but doesn’t stop the thrust of his hips, hooks his hand around the small of your back to lift you slightly off the bed, his own little bow string pulled taught. Fuck, he’s distracting. You bring your knees as high back as you can, opening yourself to him completely and he drives in harder, right up into your g-spot. “Fuck, yeah–” he grits through his clenched teeth.

“Please, please, let me ride you,” you finally get out. “Lemme ride your cock, I have to.” Please, please, please. 

He flips suddenly, rolling the both of you over with his sheer strength, never letting his cock slip from your wet clutch. He settles you on top of him, your hands planted on his strong chest and brings his knees up behind you to anchor himself. He starts to roll your hips along his length with his hands on your hips. “How’s that, my love? Better? This what you needed?” My love, your eyes roll to the back of your head and you moan for him, nodding. 

“S– so deep,” you stutter. You grind down hard on him, clenching his throbbing length as tight as you can inside you. He growls low and deep in his chest, an almost pained sound ripped out of him, and you open your eyes to watch him watch the place where he disappears inside of you, lifting his hips off the mattress to fuck up into you, moaning and whimpering, the muscles of his chest rippling with the effort. There’s a deep flush starting in his chest, crawling up the straining muscles of his neck. He’s close, you can feel it in the devastating punch of his cock inside of you, in the tense rigidness of his muscles.

“Come for me– lemme feel that cunt get all tight and wet for me, baby. Please, gotta feel it.” He brings his thumb to your clit and starts a pattern of soft swirls around it, focuses his cockhead right at that senstive place inside you and hammers into it. It’s so much, so, so intense, you wilt forward, press your chest into his and his big hand comes up to cup the entirety of your skull in his palm, his other sliding low on your back to press you down into him. You tuck your face into the sweaty, warm space under his jaw and let go at the same time that everything goes tight and wet in your pelvis. 

Fuck, I fucking love you, he mutters again and again over you. He squeezes you tight as all the muscles in his body go rock hard, and you feel the kick of his cock inside of you as he starts to come. The searing heat of his spend extending your own climax to ripple and throb on and on. 

You’re spent, wrung dry after, shivering and shaking on top of him, the slick slide of your sweat and come slippery between your two bodies. You lay there on top of him, digging and scratching your nails into the thick muscles of his neck and shoulders, trying to find purchase in his skin to settle yourself. He twists his fingers in your hair at the base of your skull to angle your neck back so that he can kiss you. He licks into your mouth, slow and deep, and the two of you stay like that for a long time, just tasting each other, with him buried inside your wet heat, feeling each other. 

How did you escape faithlessness?

Like this, right here, the escape was in the pursuit of something new, something real, something beyond category. Faith – trust – between the two of you could only grow from here on out.

Forgetting had never been the answer. You needed to remember everything, to never forget so that you could never let it happen again. Like a child who always noticed and never forgot – you needed to keep that with you. The ultimate sin had never been the infidelity, the faithlessness, but the loss of the notion that love was its own category that set the stage for all the rest. When you remembered that, the rest fell into place as it needed to. You could not run forever, could not swallow the putrid truth of a childhood lost, a childhood abandoned forever – eventually it became too much. Eventually the only recourse was to look it straight in the eye and accept it for what it had been, forgive the tragedy of it, and then move on. 

In this place, lying on top of him, his body tucked inside yours, you could let all that had passed go, find faith in new things, category in something that was beyond definition but that was still a monument of its own – a family here and now, with this man and his daughter and all the possibility for everything you’d always wanted for yourself. 

There was no need for faithlessness when you had all this.

.Epilogue

Netherfeildren's Masterlist

[dilemmaontwolegs]

The Challenge {2/2}

Aemond Targaryen x fem!bladesmith!reader Summary: It is time to deliver the sword to the prince. Warnings: 18+ only, nsfw, jousting, smut, caught in the act WC: 3.9k

HOTD Masterlist || Part One || Part Two

Two weeks passed quickly as you worked tirelessly on Prince Aemond’s sword. 

You had not heard from him since he left that morning and you were not sure whether or not you had expected him to send a message of some kind before you made the journey to King’s Landing. You couldn’t deny you were a little disappointed he hadn’t sent a raven - if for no other reason than to check in on the progress of your work. 

Nevertheless, you had gone above and beyond to create the masterpiece before you. 

It was by far the most expensive piece you had invested in and the twin sapphires alone had cost a small fortune but after being inset into the eyes of the dragon on the pommel you knew it was worth it. 

The sword was made of manganese steel imported from Dothraki, which was far lighter than iron, and had been folded with carbon dozens of times over to increase the tensile strength of the metal. The fierce dragon had been carved into the manganese steel and then dipped in gold but the snarling teeth were made of white gold and polished to perfection. 

There was no way to mistake this for any common blade and it was truly fit for royalty. 

A local leatherworker had taken the measurements of the sword and made a scabbard that would protect it while it was not in use and you slid the sword into the sheath before locking it into a travel box. 

“Your carriage is ready to leave, mistress,” Gerry said after knocking at your bedroom door. “Oh, you look lovely.”

The dress was stiff and uncomfortable and you wished you could travel in more sedate clothes but in public such a scandal could lead to incarceration and that would be bad for business. The other option was to wear the heavy cloaks of your work attire but even after a thorough washing they never smelt or looked very pleasant. 

“I look like a meringue,” you murmured, shrugging the puffy sleeves that capped just above your elbow. 

“Nonsense,” Gerry said with a giggle, taking it upon herself to straighten the layers of skirts so they hung neatly. “The prince will be lost for words, mistress.”

You narrowed your eyes at your housemaid. “What makes you say that?”

She couldn’t suppress the smile that she tried to hide behind her hand and shook her head. “The girls talk, mistress. Kasia and Tiff heard from Kyron, the stable boy, that the prince and his guard were arguing before they left.”

You shouldn't have been interested in gossip but you were leaning forward in anticipation as her smile grew. Finally you lost patience and huffed as she forced you to ask, “Arguing about what?”

“You, of course.”

“Me?”

“Aye, the prince confessed he had fallen to temptation of the flesh. That had to be you, right, mistress,” she said with a wink. “I imagine his highness has a date with the High Septon on his return. You were careful, right?”

You rolled your eyes and gave a droll nod. “Yes, mother.”

“Don’t bite my head off, I promised your ma I would watch over you, bless her soul. Now be on your way, it is a long ride.”

Kasia was already waiting at the front of the house with the carriage and you climbed into the cab before making space for her. You would have preferred for Gerry to make the three day journey with you but she wasn’t comfortable going anywhere near the capital, and you didn’t pry to find out why. 

The carriage driver whipped the reins and you jostled with the movement, eventually falling into a routine sway as the horses ambled along the road that would take you south to King's Landing. 

The noise of the crowd was unlike anything you had heard and the musicians playing an upbeat tune only added to the cacophony. Peddlers worked the stands around the stadium, selling their merchandise to the viewers, while food stalls were erected outside with the scent of their goods almost eradicating the smell from the horse stables beyond. 

Finding space on a bench seat, you pulled Kasia down beside you and stilled her leg that kept bouncing excitedly with every match that went by. You had arrived later than expected when the wheel of the carriage broke outside of Rosby and so far Ser Criston hadn’t lost a match in both jousting and sword fighting, but you were hoping to catch the next one.

You were beginning to tire of the harsh sun that beat down, the temperature enough to rival your workshop, and ready to find some solace in the shade when the next trumpets fared for the jousting final.

“Mistress, that is Prince Jacaerys,” Kasia gasped as she pointed to the house flag that had been raised and a chestnut steed trotted into the lists with a helmeted rider upon its back. “Who would dare strike a prince?”

You had an inkling as you looked to the other side of the arena and saw the flag of House Cole being draped onto the rung. “Unbelievable.”

A white stallion leisurely walked into the lists and you were the only one who wasn’t surprised to see Prince Aemond riding atop with his helmet tucked under his arm. Whispers began to spread along the rows of viewers as they realised it had been the One-Eyed Prince fighting under his knight’s banner the entire time. 

“What is the meaning of this, Aemond?” King Viserys asked as he rose slowly from the royal box. 

“It was pointed out that fighting as a prince may lead my opponents to go easy on me, and I would not have that shame,” he said with a smirk thrown Jacaerys’ way. “That need not be a problem now will it, nephew?”

Prince Jacaerys pushed his visor up over his helmet and dark hair tumbled out to frame his face. Even from so far away you could see his brown eyes were full of disdain and his jaw was clenched as he spoke through his teeth, “No problem, Uncle.”

It would have been embarrassing should he have said otherwise, he would have been practically admitting he only reached the finals because of his royal title whether or not it was true.

“Well played,” you chuckled to yourself as you watched Prince Aemond place his helmet on his head and shove a gloved hand out for his steward to give him the lance. 

In the royal box the mothers, Queen Alicent and Princess Rhaenrya, shot to their feet and rushed to the edge balustrade with concern etched into their faces. The look they shared both held reprehension for the other and you briefly wondered what it was about before a cheer erupted and your attention was brought back to the match.

The princes spurred their horses forward with a kick of the stirrups and you leaned forward in your seat with the rest of the crowd.

There was not a whisper in the air as anticipation held the spectators in silent suspension. To cheer either prince would be to insult the other so not a sound was made.

The horses reached the fence and raced towards each other with thundering hoofbeats. The distance narrowed and no one took a breath as they lowered their lances, the blunt tips aimed at the other.

From your vantage point in the stands you could see how Prince Aemond’s head was turned far more than Prince Jacaerys’ to account for the lost vision in his left eye but his aim was still well positioned. With the extra height he had over his nephew, Aemond’s reach was greater and his lance smashed into the Velaryon’s chest, glancing off the armour and under the shoulder plate.

A collective wince hissed across the crowd and the younger prince screamed as he was thrown from his horse. The scream was echoed by his mother and Princess Rhaenyra rushed from the royal box to check on his welfare along with the maesters. At least given the painful squirming on the ground, he was certainly alive.

Prince Aemond tore his helmet off and his silver hair shimmered in the brutal sunlight, it was almost too bright to look at directly but even with the glare there was no hiding the smirk on his face. Dismounting to the dirt, he sauntered over to his nephew and dropped to one knee beside him, his hand hovering over the wound he had dealt.

How you wished to be close enough to hear what he said, because although he looked like he was offering condolences there was no mistaking the disdain on his face or the amusement when Jacaerys weakly tried to push him away.

Looking up, Aemond saw his half sister nearing and rose to his feet, swiftly leaving the arena without a care for the splatterings of polite clapping for his win.

“That is my queue,” you said to Kasia as you grabbed the boxed sword from where you had kept it safely hidden beneath your skirts and rose to your feet. “I shall see you back at the inn for dinner.”

It wasn’t difficult to find Prince Aemond with his hair like a beacon. Everyone gave him a wide berth in the streets except for his trusted knight who noticed your approach first and sighed heavily. It was the sigh that caught Aemond’s attention and he turned to see what had elicited the annoyed sound from his friend.

The surefooted prince stumbled as he spotted you and his eye travelled your body from head to toe twice before he blinked and recovered.

“I almost didn’t recognise you,” he admitted and nodded his head to Ser Criston. “You may leave, I am sure my mother will want to accost you for the role you played today.”

The white cloak knight didn’t look pleased but nodded back before casting a glance your way and shaking his head. You couldn’t help but send him a sweet smile and bat your lashes at him with a dainty wave of your fingers, earning a chuff of a laugh from the prince.

“Blessed name day, my prince,” you greeted him when you were alone and once more walking towards the Red Keep. You held the box out for him, grateful you no longer had to lug it around the city. “As requested.”

“Do you have a sister?” he asked, taking it from your hands and tucking it under one arm. “You look rather similar to a woman I met a few weeks ago, though she was a little more scrappy and rather filthy.”

“Ha ha,” you exaggerated with a roll of your eyes. “Here I thought you were a prince but I have been fooled by a court jester. Funny how one and two are the same.”

“There she is.” He grinned and opened a door that led to a courtyard but the small joy he had disappeared in the company of the few people milling about. They shifted uncomfortably in his presence and the place fell silent until he had passed under an archway and turned down a corridor.

You were utterly lost by the many turns it took to come to the room he eventually led you, closing the door behind with a click of the lock.

The box thudded as he placed it on a writing desk that was covered with books and letters with the dragon crest drawn upon. They couldn’t have been important as he shoved them aside and unlatched the lid.

“Congratulations on your win,” you said as he opened the reward. “You must be proud.”

“I don’t give a shit about tourneys,” Prince Aemond retorted as he unsheathed the sword before twirling it in his hands. “I just wanted to see the look on that bastard's face when he lost.”

He continued to inspect the weapon, staring down its length to ensure it was straight before pricking his finger on the tip to test how sharp it was. He gave a satisfied hum at the conclusion and you bit your lip at the reminder of the similar sounds he had made.

Finally he brought the pommel closer and peered at the intricate dragon with intense scrutiny. “Incredible.”

“I’m almost reluctant to part ways with it,” you teased and he gripped the handle tighter as if he were prepared to fight you for it. “But you seem rather attached already and I’m feeling charitable.”

“How generous of you.” He rolled his eye and sheathed the sword before buckling the scabbard to his belt and pointing to a large purse on the table. “I suppose that means I can return that small fortune to the coffers then.”

You scoffed and crossed your arms over your chest. “I’m not that charitable.”

Unaccustomed to wearing dresses, you hadn’t realised crossing your arms had pushed your breasts up dangerously high and they were barely contained by the corset. It was only the lingering stare of the prince and the widening of his eye that drew your attention down where he was fixated.

“Not one raven, not even a ‘hello, how have you been?’” you tutted and ran your fingertips teasingly over the skin of your bosom. “I should be insulted.”

His eye followed the movement hungrily. “You have the attention of a prince, insulted is not the word that comes to mind.” One long stride closed the distance and you craned your head back to hold his stare.

“Did you confess your sins to the Septon?” you had to know as you felt the heat of his armour warming your skin. “Did you repent for the sordid touch?”

“I did. And I swore I would banish all thoughts of you from my mind.” He swallowed deeply and reached for the bowtie that held the laces of your corset together. “I did so knowing it was a lie.”

You cursed under your breath as his words affected you more than you expected and you covered his hand with yours, guiding it to the delicate laces so he would hurry up and free you from the constraints of the dress. You could finally breathe liberally and you inhaled deeply as the heavy materials fell to the floor but there wasn’t time to waste as you reached for his armour.

Your deft fingers made quick work of the buckles and Aemond caught the heavy plates before they could clatter to the floor, instead depositing them to the side where they wouldn’t cause an accident. 

Next went his damp clothes, the material strewn across the room as you wrapped each layer like a gift - eager to get to the prize that waited beneath.

“I’ve heard men fuck like a lion after fighting in a tourney, like the sweat gets their blood pumping,” you stated as you push him into the chair in front of his desk and straddled his lap. 

He grabbed your hips and lined himself up with your entrance, pulling up down his length until you couldn’t take anymore and gasped at the fullness. He still wasn’t done, not when he wanted to tease you with more than his body, his lips following the line of your jaw until he reached your ear and whispered, “Lions are nothing compared to a dragon.”

Your nails dug into his shoulders as you held on tight and rolled your hips to take your pleasure from him. He let you have your moment, enjoying the warmth of your cunt as it tightened around him and the press of your breasts to his skin, but then he wanted to chase his own ecstasy and gripped your hips. His arms should have been weak and trembling from the day spent fighting but they were still strong as he guided you up and down his cock. 

“Fuck, Aemond, you feel so good.”

“Hmm,” he growled in your ear, “I am your prince.”

“You can be my prince out there but right now you are just a man, now fuck me like one.”

In an instant you were empty and he was on his feet, spinning you around and bending you over his desk. The void you were missing was filled with one rough thrust and his hand slapped over your mouth to muffle the cry of dark pleasure that erupted. 

Gone was the restraint, gone was the control. Prince Aemond was unleashed. 

The wood cut into your hips and his ink pot spilled, books tumbled to the floor and the armour resting against the table leg toppled over. The clatter of metal was like the herald bells being struck and shouts came from outside the door. 

“Fuck,” Aemond growled at the knock that quickly followed. “Go away.”

“My prince, it is your mother,” Ser Criston called out.

“Fuck.” This time the sound wasn’t from frustration but fear and he pulled out in a rush to find his clothes scattered around the room. “Give me a minute.”

“Cole, move,” a surprisingly stern order came from a gentle feminine voice and the lock on the door was opened from the outside before the door swung open.

“Mother,” Aemond greeted quietly as he covered his manhood and bowed his head.

“I expect this unbecoming behaviour from your brother but,” she sighed dramatically and Aemond’s head dipped further at the disappointment radiating from his mother, “not my sweet Aemond.”

You coughed a laugh and covered your mouth as the sound drew her attention to you. You didn’t have enough hands to cover your nakedness and your dress was inconveniently in a head at her feet. 

“Who are you?”

“I’m no one, your highness,” you said as you shifted on your feet and tried to shimmy across to hide behind the prince. 

“Her name is Y/N,” Ser Criston said without even stepping into the room.

“The bladesmith you visited, who is also the daughter of the metal merchant?” she confirmed as she took a second look at you before turning her back. “Cover yourselves.”

“Yes, mother.” Aemond grabbed your dress first and tossed it with more force than necessary before swiping his own undershorts up from the floor. “I will go to the Sept and confess.”

“Don’t bother,” Alicent scoffed with a toss of her head. “You are not contrite. No, I have another way for you to repent and save your honour.”

It was far harder to get the dress back on than it was to get off, especially since it had taken the help of Kasia last time. You were still busy trying to thread the laces back through the eyelets when the Queen dropped the bomb.

“You will wed her, Aemond. I won’t have any more shame on this house.”

“Mother,” Aemond interrupted but she held up a hand to silence him, something that wasn’t going to stop you.

“Beg your pardon, majesty, but fuck that. I’ll take a vow of silence and be on my way out of this dreadful city.”

“Silence? From you?” she said with a humourless laugh. “If the people weren't still watching the tourney the entire residence would have heard your filth. No, I’ve made up my mind.”

“More like lost it,” you uttered before Aemond pinned you with a glare that had you closing your mouth once again.

“Cole, make sure my son’s betrothed finds her way to her own room. Alone.” With that she departed and Aemond’s posture slumped.

The moment she was out of hearing range you turned to him. “I’m serious, I’m not marrying you, or anyone for that matter.”

“I don’t believe we have a choice.”

“I do.” You tied a knot in the lace just enough to be sure it wouldn’t suddenly come apart as you stormed out of the room and straight into that bothersome guard. “Move.” Ser Criston looked at the prince but you snapped your fingers in front of his face. “I’m talking to you, so don’t look at him.”

“Let her pass,” Aemond said and your head spun incredulously towards him to find him already dressed. “I’ll escort her.”

“To the ladies wing?” he asked as he moved aside and let you through.

“To the stables.” Aemond caught your arm and turned away from his guard to head in the other direction. “I’ll not marry a stranger because I wanted to wet my prick.”

“How uncouth,” you teased as you hurried to match his pace through the Red Keep. “Such a filthy mouth, Prince Aemond.”

He growled as he pushed you against the cold stone wall and caged you between his arms, his erection hard against your hip through the layers of cloth separating you. “Now is not the time to tease me.”

“Yeah?” you pushed back, grinding yourself shamelessly against him in the empty hall. “Or what?”

Aemond’s fist hit the stone with a groan before his hand circled your wrist and tugged you with a renewed pace. “You were born of the Seven Hells, I swear.”

“What makes you say that, my prince?” I asked sweetly. “My devilish good looks or what was it my stable boy overheard…oh yes, my tempting flesh?”

Aemond opened a door and the irritating smell of stale dust told you the storage room was not often used before he pushed you inside and closed the door behind him. “This is the last time,” he promised himself as he bunched the material of your skirt up over your waist and freed himself from his trousers.

You knew you would miss the feeling of him stretching your cunt with each thrust and the way he stroked your walls until they clenched around him. None of your past lovers had been able to fill you quite like he did, or take your attitude either.

“You can always visit me,” you offered in a moment of weakness as the tension of the oncoming orgasm built, “when your sword needs taking care of.”

The sounds of your bodies slapping together filled the room and the table you were sitting upon rocked as Aemond filled the space between your legs. His hand dropped your skirts so he could cradle your face, his thumb tracing your lips. “The bladesmiths here will suffice.”

“I wasn’t talking about that sword.” You nipped at his thumb and smirked, feeling him react instantly as he rutted harder against you. Your legs wrapped around his and your hands slipped under his shirt as you pulled him closer, chasing the high that was cresting inside you.

Your orgasm erased your ability to think and your body jerked as wave after wave of pleasure washed over you. The feel of your cunt pulsing around him tipped the prince over the edge and he released a shuddering breath as he spilled himself within you.

There was no time to enjoy the afterglow and Aemond tucked himself back into his trousers before pulling your skirt down over your legs that were still dangling off the table.

“I doubt my mother will let me leave the keep for a while after this,” he said as he helped you off the table and onto shaking legs.

“Do you always do what your mother says?” You asked him, fixing one of the clasps of his vest that had come undone.

“Don’t.”

Your lips twitched as you saw the fire in his eye. “Don’t what, my prince?”

“Don’t challenge me.”

“Afraid to lose?”

He chuckled and caught your chin between his thumb and forefinger. His teeth bared as he leaned closer and his silver hair brushed your shoulder while his hot breath kissed your skin.

“You should know by now…I never lose.”

Tagging: @hopebaker , @padfooteyes , @fan-goddess , @whitefang1919 , @drinking-tea-and-be-obsessed , @let-love-bleeds-red , @raven1234321

[akalikai]

TMAGP EP 10 SPOILER (THEORY ABOUT [ERROR])

People are probably very confused by me bringing up Lucia Wright from TMA so let me explain why I think [ERROR] might be her.

It's rly simple lmao. I listen to TMAGP on YouTube so after the episode was done, I checked the cast list on YouTube. [ERROR] was credited as Beth Eyre (still weirded out by Bonzo being uncredited though).

I did a little bit of digging and found out Beth Eyre did actually guest star in one of the TMA episodes, MAG130, The Flesh.

She was Lucia Wright, the church-visiting girl who accidentally got caught in the Slaughter ritual and was the only one to survive. She came to the institute to give Gertrude her statement.

Now, obviously they could be reusing VAs to play completely different characters but with the theme of Celia, Gerry, and Gertrude being played by their original VAs, even if they're the TMAGP version of themselves, I strongly believe that's not the case.

I think that Lucia Wright could be our key to figuring out how Celia got here.

We see her escaping the tunnels which still exist here so the Panopticon probably still exists. Additionally, she doesn't sound like she's in a good state so I assume she's been hiding down there. Maybe Celia went through the same thing but had the time to adjust? And when she was ready, Celia came up and found the OIAR since they're the closest thing this universe has the institute after it burned down.

I will say though, we're basically seeing people who were not main characters or really all that important but whose voices we HAVE actually heard. Celia and Lucia. I know Gerry and Gertrude are important in TMA but like Gerry was actually one IN one episode.

So yeah, here's why I keep saying it's Lucia Wright lol and I'm excited bc I genuinely like her. I mean. Complicated relationship with religion but then finding a way to make her peace with it? Visiting all other places worship without judgment? SURVIVED A FUCKING FLESH RITUAL???

Like obviously she probably ended up in a flesh dimension when the TMA world went Eyepocalypse, so was she prey or a hunter? And did she get sucked through the Hilltop Road rift?

Four weeks till we get anything AAAAAA (I know we won't get answers about this for ages though)

[kryptonbabe]

The absence of the superego psychological structure in JSA bronze age comics, an observation

One thing that makes reading the JSA revival run from 1976 such an interesting experience is just how much of their inner thoughts they are willing to share with each other. The members of this team will express the most intense feelings of despair, anger and every other emotion without thinking twice, it makes for a very intense reading experience. These people are on the edge and they will let you know about their intrusive thoughts, deep feelings and desires, the drama is always through the roof, and I didn't even include Power Girl's exchanges with Superman and Wildcat (I'm saving these for another post)

In Freudian psychology we have:

(...) the id is the impulsive part of your personality that is driven by pleasure and repulsed by pain, the superego is the judgmental and morally correct part of your personality, and the ego is the conscious part of your personality that mediates between the id and the superego and makes decisions.

And I can only think of the challenge the JSA team of this time would present for these definitions, because they seem unburdened by the superego aspect of their mind, just saying what their id demands, particularly when it comes to sharing their feelings. And that is not to say these characters don't have interesting inner lives, it's just that they're very transparent about their feelings and it's absolutely appealing to witness such a dynamic

This particular style of writing reminds me of what Chris Claremont was also doing with the Uncanny X-Men at Marvel (All-Star Comics revival and Claremont's X-Men were published only 6 months apart), which might just be an example of how the writing trends of superhero comic books were changing with the times. The difference is: the X-men heroes were younger and less experienced while the JSA characters are jaded, they share a common history of decades with each other and their foes, this leaves a lot of room for drama and conflict (not to put these books against each other they're just different and I love both). Honestly I'm a melodrama fan, I have an appreciation for this soap opera style of comic book narrative and I'm glad there's so much good material to get into. There's a reason why the JSA characters are still popular to this day

From All-Star Comics (1976 revival), collected in Only legends live forever TPB (2019). Written by: Gerry Conway & Paul Levitz. Art by Keith Giffen & Wally Wood

[puckpocketed]

UPON FURTHER RESEARCH i may have found the unluckiest girl in the world, Canadiens edition. this is old news to a lot of people but its news to ME!!!!! David Reinbacher uou have been throuhg the trenches hello take my fin GET BEHIND ME

drafted in Bedards draft year but also the next 3 guys are Carlsson-Fantilli-Smith . and everyone and their mother was wondering who was gonna get Michkov. what an act to follow RIP

CAREY PRICE BLUE SCREENED WHILE CALLING OUT HIS NAME. CAN'T MAKE THIS UP!! "Bonsoir, Les Canadiens de Montreal are proud to select, David….........." HELPPPPPP???

to make things worse people sent him thousands of awful messages. AS THOUGH IT WAS HIS FAULT HE GOT DRAFTED INSTEAD OF THE OTHER KID. the messages included death threats and comparisons to hitler (he is austrian. and me. well. I am lighting them all on fire ! <3 )

so the Habs send him back to the NL to let him develop without the pressure of this accursed fucking market right. that should be fine. right.

BOOM !INJURY!!! TWO INJURIES!! im wailing... sobbing... when will it end

His team, Kloten, acquired a new GM the year before. whats the worst that could happen?

THREE DIFFERENT COACHES! AT ONE POINT THE GM IS COACHING??

Kloten were sort of average the year before but this year its flop city. 17-29-6 ahaha <3

god . their system is. not good. per this article -> "Gerry Fleming, named this summer and who was coaching at the opening of the season, is responsible for turning a fairly interesting 22-23 team into a very bad one, including making them defend man on man all over the defensive zone."

and reinbacher saw the most use of all the defensemen in rotation for yet another season. helo .

most difficult match ups. second worst team in the league. so of course he sees a regression in production from his draft year, and during what was supposed to be a season for development this is.Not Good!!!

gonna just. leave some of thee most devastating/endearing quotes from this article below:

like even the nicest fans are sort of holding their noses about him at the time. like oh. him? not an exciting pick at all, according to many. not what the Habs need, in a draft year stacked with offensive talent. not flashy. unsexy, well-rounded hockey. consensus best defenseman on draft day but that's still not good enough !!

weight of the world type beat…gotta prove you're worth that high draft pick. gotta show them they shouldn't have sent you back. they saw there was a mote of excellence in you once and surely if you try to do everything on your own they'll see it again right? <3 ahahahaha.... !

and finally their season ends and the habs reassign him to the AHL. christ alive!!!!!!

he makes his AHL debut with the Laval Rocket and does pretty well!! scores his first goal !!

here's something that made me scream. what are u doing to him, montreal...................

Anyway. the boys in Laval call him Rhino (alt spelling: Reino?) and thats ADORABLE and hes going right beside all the other dmen in my heart .tucking him in carefully!!!!

whatever the hell is goin on with him and Lane Hutson.... i love when two players are bonded cats at the shelter. cosmically fated to be each other's d-pair? hello <3

what if we were prospects and everyone thought we fit together perfectly. what then.

feeling very hinged and regular. hello. unluckiest girl in the world David Reinbacher . <3

[wndaswife]

Hi if your requests are open :) I saw you write for Gerri Fields and THANK YOU BECAUSE THERE IS LITERALLY NO FICS OF HER(Favourite Lizzie character)

But I was wondering if I could request a fic! So basically R and Gerri are together but it’s just fluff and banter! Gerri Invites Reader over to the party her parents are throwing and Gerri is just trying to sneak away with R until Gerri’s family keep calling them back?

If you can’t do this request it’s no problem thank you for taking the time to read it anyways :) I love your fics and I hope you have an amazing Day/Night

baby steps | gerri fields & fem!reader

It’s the first official night you’re spending together as girlfriends, but neither you nor Gerri can find enough peace to get each other alone.

Word count: 2845

Tags: fluff, humour, suggestive language, cute little gays trying doing their cute little gay things, ft. gerri’s chaotic family

A/N: yeah i totally get that!! i really love gerri too so im really glad you enjoy reading my fics ab her as much as i love writing them <3 thanks for requesting this!!

“Did you bring your laptop?” 

You dug through your bag and carefully pulled your laptop out before setting it down on Gerri’s bed.

“The charger?” she asked.

You answered, “Yeah.”

Tonight was the first night you were spending with Gerri now that you were dating. You’d been best friends with each other since the first year of high school and there’d been likely hundreds of sleepovers before, but there was a bit of an unspoken excitement between the two of you tonight.

Over the past three weeks, you’d been getting to know the roommate you’d be moving in with in September, and last week you went to one of her parties a city away with Gerri. 

For your future roommate, it was a farewell party for her thrown a bit earlier in the summer because one of her best friends was going to be travelling to Armenia with not enough time to have a big party like they wanted once they came back — so they celebrated in July.

For you and Gerri, it was a chance to get out of the neighbourhood you’ve always known around the people you’ve always known, and the both of you were rather excited to get out for a while because you’d be staying there overnight due to how long the drive was, and neither of you, including your roommate, wanted you travelling that far so late into the night.

Maybe it was just how overwhelming the night was or how different things were there, but you ended up leaving the party to take a walk around the neighbourhood with Gerri. You walked around together talking about things you liked about home and all the memories you shared together from years ago — old crushes, old friends, each other.

Wrapped up in the warm feeling of nostalgia and sharing in each other’s sole company, it was Gerri who kissed you first, who took your hand and cupped your cheek and pulled you close. But it was you who then had her back against a nearby tree, hugging her around the waist and running your hands through her hair, taking your best friend as yours for the first time.

It didn’t seem like things were all too different now that you were together. It felt like that was a testament to how close the two of you have always been, and how long-developed the love for each other had been growing until one night it just had to give.

So although neither of you had outright said it, tonight was a bit of a milestone. 

Both of you were determined to be able to spend time alone together, to delve into the depths of your relationship that’d been waiting patiently for your exploration — waiting for years. Now you didn’t have to look at each other and feel the soft stirring deep within your chests at the sight of one another and attribute all of it to simply being close friends.

Now, you could feel what you’d always felt for one another and do it all as girlfriends.

“Toothbrush?”

You searched through the smaller bag that you put aside for your toiletries. 

“No, I forgot it,” you replied with a wince. “Shit.”

Gerri waved her hand dismissively. “Okay,” she said. “It’s fine, we have an extra and you can use the toothpaste I have.” 

“Orrr,” you drawled as you crept up to your girlfriend while she dug through the linen closet in the hallway for an extra toothbrush, “I could just use yours.”

She laughed and pushed you off of her with her hand on your shoulder when you wrapped your arms around her waist from behind. “That’s disgusting,” she said. 

“I read in an article that the healthiest relationships share stuff, you know — shampoo, clothes, toothbrushes.”

“Oh, yeah?” she asked and raised an eyebrow, closing the linen closet with a new toothbrush in her hand as you followed her back into her bedroom. “Where’d you read that? Bullshit-dot-org?”

You sat down on her bed with a dramatic huff and rubbed your palms against her soft sheets. 

“You’re not being very romantic right now,” you teased and watched as she set the toothbrush down on your bag. 

The corner of Gerri’s mouth twitched upwards and she repressed a tiny smirk as she walked over to you so you were looking up at her. “Not being romantic enough?” she asked. She slid her knee between your legs and with a hand on your shoulder, carefully pushed you back so she could lean over you. 

Leaning down further while your back was now flat on her bed, Gerri hooked her fingers around the collar of your shirt and tugged down so she could kiss your exposed collarbone, making you shudder. 

She was so gentle. 

Until last week, you’ve never known Gerri like this before, but you’d be lying if you said you’d never thought about how gentle her hands would be on your body or how her soft lips would feel like on yours. 

She was more adventurous than you imagined, often taking the initiative to slip herself on top of you and bury you in intimate, warm kisses. It always made you rather flustered because prior to the first time you were underneath her, you had no idea how much passion had been resting within her. 

You haven’t had sex together yet, but just thinking about it made you lightheaded. 

“What do you know about romance?” she taunted, and you could see from the corner of your eyes how she looked up at you from the crook of your neck with a grin. 

You stuttered and cleared your throat before finally being able to say, “I know… a little.”

“Tell me,” Gerri said, her fingers inching up your hip underneath your shirt, still preoccupied with pressing soft ghosting kisses up your neck. 

Your brain completely short circuited and you pathetically answered, “I can send you the article.”

Gerri’s laugh escaped her in a sharp exhale of breath against your neck and she raised her head to laugh. “You fucking idiot,” she said and lifted her hand that was under your shirt to slap your side. 

The weight she had on your chest made it hard for you to laugh and you had to turn onto your side and let out a wheeze-like laugh. 

A knock came at the bedroom door and Gerri straightened while you struggled between slowly-subsiding giggles to move onto your elbows. 

Gerri’s mom opened the door and peeked her head inside. “Are you both ready?” she asked. 

“Yep!” you answered and sat up properly. “And I hope you don’t mind, but I forgot my toothbrush and Gerri gave me one of the extra ones in the linen closet.”

“That’s fine, honey,” Kate replied with a friendly smile. She then entered her daughter’s bedroom and began tinkering around with the things on Gerri’s desk idly while she spoke.

“Should I be worried about the two of you?” she asked and side-eyed the both of you inconspicuously. 

Your girlfriend gave you an unknowing look before asking, “What?”

“I mean the two of you…” Kate pressed then leaned back against the desk. She pressed the sides of her index fingers together. “College students. Dating. Sleeping in the same room.”

Gerri’s face immediately turned red and she quickly walked over to her mom and pulled her from the desk before urging her out of the room. 

“Ger, I’m a very accepting woman and I love that you’re dating Y/N, but–”

She was cut off when she was pushed out of the bedroom. 

“Keep the door open!” Kate tried to squeeze in before Gerri shut the door in her face and promptly locked it. 

Over the next hour, guests began filling the house to celebrate Danny’s birthday while you and Gerri stayed up in her bedroom snacking on liquorice and caramel M&Ms.

When parties happened at Gerri’s for Kate, the crowd was mostly filled with laidback wine moms, but when parties were filled with mostly Danny’s coworkers and friends, parties were lively and a bit loud and full of overly-excited drunks — himself included.

But once the scent of barbecue from the backyard started travelling up to Gerri’s room, neither of you could hold back waiting until you could sneak out and get some food without being noticed.

Maybe you should’ve gone out earlier when there weren’t as many people, but you both easily lost track of time when Gerri started playing you a bunch of new songs she was trying to learn on her guitar; after each song, at least one of you would keep saying that you had time for her to play just one more before you went downstairs to get food.

As if trekking through dangerous terrain, Gerri went downstairs first while you followed behind slowly. She mapped out the backyard and spotted the table set up with food. 

In the driveway, a few cars shut their doors and Gerri pulled you out to the back with her so you could both quickly fill your plates before the next wave of guests filed into the backyard. 

Wordlessly, she gave you a plate and a fork and an empty cup so you could make quick work of bringing the food and drinks up to her bedroom. 

Chatter went on in the background and Gerri listened in on the conversation to keep herself aware of whether she or you were yet detected.

Once you finished filling your plates, Gerri put her hand on your upper back and urged you forward. She whispered in your ear beyond clenched teeth, “Hurry, hurry.”

“Oh! Ladies!” Kate called out to both of you and hurried over to grab Gerri’s hand.

“Mom…” she hissed quietly, trying to protest without making too much of a fuss lest she bring about more attention to the both of you. 

Though you weren’t pulled back with her, you didn’t want to leave Gerri outside alone so you stuck around too and followed behind your girlfriend while she was pulled back into the depths of the precarious backyard.

Ignoring her daughter’s complaints, Kate turned around and introduced her to the guests who just stepped into the backyard with dishes of food in their hands.

“Have you met my daughter Gerri?” she asked them and placed a hand on her back, urging her forward subtly. 

“Hi,” Gerri greeted, and you could hear her response grit out of her as if her throat had suddenly become the texture of a cheese grater. 

She chatted a little with Kate and Danny’s mutual friends, and from the corner of your eye you could see Danny approaching. 

You bit the inside of your cheek and looked over to Gerri, who also noticed her father approaching before quickly becoming impatient, evident in the way she began running her fingernail along the side of her paper plate anxiously.

“Oh, heavens,” Kate said and reached back to then wrap an arm around you and pull you forward. “We’re completely ignoring Y/N.”

A brief wordless exchange of desperation was shared between you and Gerri’s eyes when she caught sight of you being pulled in front of her. 

Kate rubbed her hand against your upper arm and introduced you: “This is Y/N — Gerri’s girlfriend.”

“Mom!” whined Gerri as she tugged at her mom’s sleeve to keep her quiet. Her face looked flushed and she avoided eye contact with you, and it seemed to you that she felt flustered and embarrassed and you thought it was really cute. 

You subtly bumped your knuckle against her hand and she smiled at you shyly.

“What?” Kate asked cluelessly, looking between the both of you. “Gerri, honey, we all support you here. Don’t be shy. It’s not nice to exclude your girlfriend from things.” 

“We’re so proud of the two of them,” Danny said and wrapped his arms around both you and Gerri, pulling the both of you into a side hug. “We always worried some heartbreaker would come in and swoop our sweet girl away from us, but we struck gold by having Y/N join our family. We’ve always considered her as one of our own.”

His words nearly nestled within you with great sentiment and warmth and you parted your lips to thank him graciously before he added, “You know, my best friend in high school was gay.”

Gerri groaned and pushed her dad away before taking your wrist and dragging you back inside, hot steam practically fuming out of her ears.

Danny shook his fists in the air happily. “I love the gays!” he then exclaimed to which several of his friends also cheered.

Daytime drinking was no joke.

When you finally got back into the house together and were passing the living room, three of Gerri’s much-younger cousins that just started playing Mario Kart on the Switch turned around and cheered together with bright smiles, “Hi, Gerri’s girlfriend!”

“Her name is Y/N,” Kate called across the kitchen as she was bringing in an empty pitcher of water to refill.

Gerri’s head snapped back around to scowl at her mother who she just couldn’t seem to get away from.

“Hi, Y/N!” her cousins corrected, still waving cheerfully.

You smiled back and waved, “Hello, Gerri’s cousins.”

They found that a little funny for whatever reason and their giggles made you laugh.

“Why can’t you guys just mind your own business and play your stupid game?” Gerri angrily snapped at them and pulled you upstairs by the wrist.

Peering over your girlfriend’s shoulder as she led you back upstairs, you exchanged one more wave with her cousins who were still smiling at you from the living room.

When the two of you finally got back to her bedroom, Gerri locked her door and told you that neither of you were to open it if someone knocked, and if needed she’d talk to whoever was outside only through the closed door. 

After that rule was sternly set, the both of you changed into more comfortable clothes as you weren’t planning on going back out any further than the kitchen for the rest of the night.

While sitting at her desk together eating with a show playing on her laptop, you mixed a bite of a caramel M&M with a bite of steak to prove to her that chocolate and meat did indeed mix together well.

You opened your mouth to show her but didn’t even get half a second into it before her hand landed right on your face and she pushed you back.

“You’re so gross,” she laughed and handed you her water bottle, still convinced that it tasted horrendous together. But you pushed forward after you swallowed and nuzzled your nose against her cheek. 

Feeling suddenly sentimental in the cool air of her bedroom doing nothing but spending time together like you always had as friends and now as girlfriends, you hugged her tight and spoke against her cheek, “You’re my best friend, Gerri.”

She set her water bottle down and turned her head so she could look at you. “You’re mine too,” she said and smiled happily.

Sometimes when it came suddenly without either of you really thinking about it, kissing each other often made you both feel a bit stunned afterwards for just a second or two like how it felt just then when she kissed you.

It was something to get used to — the fact that you could kiss each other now.

A part of you hoped neither of you would ever get used to it though, because you loved seeing Gerri look away from you afterwards while her cheeks were flushed a soft pink, and how much wider her smile got when you kissed her again while she was still feeling a bit shy.

When the two of you got tired, you laid in bed together with Gerri’s arms wrapped around your body hugging you securely from behind, her chin resting atop your head. She played with your fingers idly while you continued to watch your show together on her laptop.

Eventually, you could tell from the sound of her breathing that she was beginning to fall asleep and although she told you she could stay up for a little longer, you convinced her to sleep when you turned around and laid her head against your chest. She told you that she’d wake up later so you didn’t have to end the night off so early and that she was only taking a small nap.

You kept your fingers slowly massaging the back of her head so she didn’t have to try keeping herself awake, and so the next time Gerri woke up was early in the morning with the soft light from her desk still on and your warm arms still wrapped around her body while you slept.

Your first night spent together as lovers, albeit initially frenzied, ended up being nothing less than perfect. 

But what was your friendship with Gerri if not a bit chaotic from time to time?

That was how you liked it, anyway.

[gingiesworld]

Perfect (Kinktober)

Gerri Fields x GN! Reader

Warnings: Smut. Virgin Gerri. Amab! Reader

Taglist: @bababaka @natashaswife4125

18+ MINORS DNI

Heading off to college is a scary thing to most, especially when you're headed to a different college to your best friend since childhood. Gerri had settled into her dorm within the week, with countless phonecalls from her mom since she had arrived. That was also when she noticed that an old friend who she had drifted apart from wandering the halls.

"I see you still play." Gerri stated as she caught up to them, taking note of the drumsticks in their back pocket.

"Gerri?" They questioned as she nodded with a shy smile. "Wow, it has been ages."

"Well, technically a few months but who's counting." She teased as they chuckled lightly. "How have you been?" She asked them as the two walked across campus.

"I have been great, how about you? How was your summer?" They asked her as she nodded with a tight lipped smile.

"It was eventful, that's for sure." She told them.

"I heard about your dad." They told her. "My mom was there at his funeral. I'm sorry I couldn't come as I was at my dad's. You know the whole custody agreement."

"That's ok." She waved them off as they both approached a coffee cart. Y/N ordered two flat whites, not knowing exactly what Gerri's poison is just yet. "I had Lillie there with me and my mom."

"She is a strong woman." Y/N stated as they handed her the warm beverage. "Just like her daughter." Gerri blushed slightly as she took a sip of her drink, trying to avoid their eyes as old feelings came rushing back.

"Thank you." She whispered before they walked her back to her dorm, a promise of seeing each other open as the two finished their day's with smiles on their faces.

As the weeks went on and classes became more and more demanding. Y/N had also had more band practice which they had invited Gerri to tag along. As much as Gerri was nervous to be around other people she has no idea about, she was excited to be near Y/N once more.

"Who is this pretty lady?" Terrence questioned as he leaned on his mic stand as Y/N soon wrapped their arms around her waist, already sensing her uncomfortable state.

"This is Gerri, a really good friend of mine and she is off limits." Y/N pointed to each of them as they soon sat on their stool as Gerri stood at the side. Watching as they soon started to play one of their warm up covers.

Gerri couldn't help but feel a certain way as she watched the sweat soon drip from their form as they hit the drums to the perfect rhythm of the song. The concentration on their face as to make sure not to make a mistake which could cost them dearly.

As they soon changed into one of their own songs, Gerri's heart skipped a beat when Y/N also started to sing their line as they looked at the green eyed girl to the side. This brought out a whole new view of the friend she used to have when she was younger and in high school.

The goofy kid who had braces and acne had had the most incredible glow up she had ever seen and she wanted them. She wanted them to make her their's. To be her first time.

"What did you think?" Y/N asked her once they stood before her, she looked up with a dumbfounded look on their face as they smirked at her.

"I. Wow." She breathed out as she looked over the sweat dripping from them before they soon took her hands, leading her outside as they became concerned as she was flushed.

"Are you ok Gerri?" They asked her as she could only nod before taking their lips in hers. Groaning, they pushed her up against the wall beside the fire exit as their hands held her hips as she had her arms around their neck.

"Take me." She whispered as seductively as she could. "I want you to be my first." She told them as they just nodded, not bothering to tell their bandmates they were leaving as they led her back to their dorm.

Once they had closed the door, Gerri looked them in the eye as she stripped her clothes as Y/N made sure their door was locked. Stepping forward as she shed her clothes before she started to remove their sweaty clothes.

"Are you sure?" They asked her as she just nodded with her bottom lip between her teeth.

"I want this. I want you to be my first Y/N." She told them as her hands rested flat against their chest. They then captured her lips in a tender kiss before leading her to their bed, laying her down gently before continuing their kisses. Pulling back slightly to gaze into her green orbs.

"You are ethereal." They whispered before they started to kiss her neck. "Can I ask you something." She just nodded as her hands held their shoulders, caressing their skin. "Do you want this to be more than a one time thing because I don't think I can do a one time thing with you Ger."

"I want this to be more than that." She whispered before Y/N leaned in and kissed her once more. Their hands caressing her sides as she wrapped her arms around their shoulders and her legs around their waist. Her hips rolling against their own as their length unintentionally slipped inside. "Fuck." Gerri hissed at the stinging sensation before Y/N started to thrust slowly. Soon enough her moans of pain turned into sounds of pleasure as Y/N kept going at a slow and steady pace.

They moved their other hand between their bodies to circle her clit, helping her reach her climax as they sucked on her neck. Gerri was in a stated of pure euphoria as she let go, seeing stars as her legs trembled before they soon pulled out and finished on her stomach.

"That was." She whispered breathlessly as they smiled softly as she regained her composure.

"You're perfect." They whispered before kissing her softly. Gerri watched as they moved away and disappeared into the bathroom, returning with a damp cloth in their hands as she watched them clean her up with love and care. The butterflies in her stomach were going insane at the simple gesture.

[robyn-i-guess]

gerrymichael enjoyers and writers i want your opinion 🎤

ok so i have this au fic for gerrymichael where it's college au, and it's a like the whole bad boy/good girl (minus the fact they're both boys, and even that's questionable)

basically, gerry is stereotyped due to his more alternative looks and everyone assumes he's probably doing illegal things or just sleeps around a lot

meanwhile michael is the head of student council "goody two shoes" type, who most are sort of aware of but don't know anything about

gerry thinks about michael. a lot. he sees them in the halls for only a few seconds a day but thinks about him for a lot longer. hallway crush vibes. and when they get put into a painting class together, suddenly they have an opportunity to meet, and gerry is freaking out a usual amount. (there's more to the whole plot but that's just the beginning bit)

putting a short lil concept thing under the cut

Gerard Keay does not know Michael Shelley.

The only reason he knows their name is because they're in the student council, meaning it's not uncommon for their name to be said during school events.

He has only seen them in hallways, passing by in a rush while holding papers or books that always seem like they're going to fall out of their hands. Even in those moments, most of what Gerard is able to catch is a blur of golden curls and eyes that are ridden with exhaustion.

So, it is safe to say that he does not know Michael.

That fact only caused confusion to him whenever Gerard realized his strange excitement once learning that Michael would be in one of his classes for the semester.

It was an art class, one that he had picked due to him already being practiced is painting and drawing. He assumed it would be a fun class, or at least one that wouldn't be too stressful. However, when he had first walked into that classroom and saw Michael Shelley sitting at an area in the back, Gerard had assumed the emotion he was feeling was stress. He couldn't pinpoint why, it wasn't like he was intimidated by their status, but he couldn't shake the feeling of nervousness he felt when he accidentally locked eyes with them. He turned his head quickly in that moment, deciding to sit in the front of the room despite that not being where he'd usually prefer to be. Something about Michael sitting there made Gerard think twice about sitting in the back as he normally would.

The lecture went smoothly, it mostly being an introduction to the professor and what would be happening throughout the classes. So did the next, and then the next one after that. That didn't get rid of the feeling he felt, however, every time that Gerard walked into that room and attempted to avoid looking at the one with golden curls in the back. He knew he'd have to talk to them at some point, it was inevitable, but there was something about them that meant he was more nervous to talk to them than he usually would be. And he very much denied the idea that it could be caused by any... feelings he may have. Gerard ruled it as impossible, as he had never spoken to them, and he wasn't that much of an idiot to fall for someone he'd only mostly seen in hallways.

Michael wasn't one to speak up in class, and instead they'd work silently on any research on the history of art they may have been doing, only giving simple responses or nods when the professor would come around and ask how their work was coming along. When Gerard thought about it, he didn't really know what their voice sounded like because it was always quiet or unintelligible from their distance. That only made him more interested in talking to them.

That day never came, though, much to Gerard's disappointment.

They both went through that class without talking to each other once, and when Gerard left that room for the last time he couldn't help but feel like he had failed at some kind of goal. A failure that had meant he would be left with only seeing the elusive Michael Shelley in hallway rushes again, which annoyed him in a way he didn't understand.

He did talk to them one day, though.

(note this is old as heck lmao i've gotten better at writing since i wrote this)

anyways yeah. should i continue it or is it too basic idk, i want to write it for me but it would also be multiple chapters long and my "1k-words-is-rare-for-me" self probably won't bother to write it unless someone else is interested

[statementlou]

hi it's just me being nosy and asking a follow up to your vinyl anon--what are some of your non-1DCU favorites? collection tour please 😇

hiiii gosh and look you even put the link on for me to make it easy! The question itself is NOT EASY though I was like BUT WHAT IF I FORGET ONE?? Like what CATEGORY of favorite?! But the timing couldn't be better, I am currently as previously mentioned in the process of moving all of my stuff around, a huge project that 1) is perfect for listening to records while I do things like move books from one shelf to another and 2) means I just today moved my record player to a far better place where I am actually using it again for the first time in ages (for one thing onto an actual properly non wobbly surface) so I listened to records today and picked a few that will do sorry to all the others I forgot and love even more I'm sure

I picked first up Daydream Nation by Sonic Youth not just because it's so good (IT IS THOUGH) but also because it's an album that having it on vinyl feels SO right and it makes me happy just to handle; the pretty Gerhard Richter painting cover, a little crackle and pop with the music, the aesthetic of it all! I mean Sonic Youth probably literally birthed the indie hipster luddite aesthetic, it seems Right™ Second is The Bonny by Gerry Cinnamon, because being able to listen to the songs The Bonny and Ghost specifically on vinyl feeds my soul in deep and important ways. Also the 4th side is blank and etched with lyrics, like the JHO single, very cool. And last the record/album I've almost certainly played the most times in my life, even though the copy I have has skips now (to be loved is to changed and all that yk) and I haven't to date been able to bring myself to buy a reissue or pay $$$ for another original: 24 Hour Revenge Therapy by Jawbreaker. It's just important in like 15 different ways okay? Tip, if anyone is like huh! I will go listen to this album I've never heard it (DO!! also then tweet it at Louis a lot, he would REALLY LIKE IT) I think the best way to do this is to skip the first song the first time, it's a whole different vibe than the rest. Also right now my fave is LTLIVE on vinyl 😭 playing records makes me want to put it on SO BAD :((( also bonus content, one of my favorite things about records for some reason is seeing who goes next to who idk I just find it fun and if I were naming a band it would totally be a big consideration... so for extra tour of the shelf, Gerry Cinnamon is between the Germs and The Gits (listen the Cs are crowded, it's my shelf I can do what I want), Sonic Youth was between The Snuts and Social Distortion- which the astute may notice is not correct, she will be going back other side of Social D- and Jawbreaker nestle cozily between Japandroids and Jerk With A Bomb. Louis, for the record, lives between very twee girl band Tiger Trap and very fast hardcore band Tragatello, lol. A weird bill, that, but they do have one thing in common- all feature queer musicians

[straightbaittournament]

may the best bait win! propaganda under the cut

luke and leia:

The idea of Luke and Leia was used in advertisements but they obviously decided not to do that. IT’S SO FUNNY. Like, I think this is the closest white straight people will ever get to ‘they were cousins’ing a couple. I looked up advertising to see if it was just in the movie proper or it WAS used to sell it and https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=5z1SziDPKQw&t=118s&pp=2AF2kAIB ‘Luke and Leia: in danger, in love, in Star Wars’ is going to be one of the things that rolls around in my head for ages. It’s not just the whole ‘het love triangle advertises 2nd pairing that everyone knows won’t happen’ like Twilight, it’s the backpeddaling ‘no no it can’t happen, they’re actually siblings! It’d be weird! Ignore the ‘good luck’ kiss and the ‘I’ll be back’ kiss in the medbay and of course the full on make out session scene that happened! And even our own advertising’ Of it all.‘

roman and gerri:

a very queer coded Hetero relationship. slime puppy is real that’s s real thing she says they absolutely have a weird fucking thing going on. weird coworkers with benefits mommy dom undertones thing going on except they never actually touch they just flirt and dirty talk obscenely and show-typically office talk about taking over the company and backstabbing. this is a thing for like one season and then it's dropped with little to no mention of what's in store for them or like what the fuck happened. no development no conclusion it just happened and then uhhhhhhh. they got screentime as a pair like once in a blue moon. romangerri girls were gnawing at scraps milf x ratboy. they have like a weird sexual thing going on until they mutually betray each other on several occasions and then they end the show on bad terms but where they both still clearly have lingering feelings for each other. romangerri is basically just like queerbaiting but with straight people. have you seen their season 2 promo poster