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stardust-kenobi · 4 years

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Let Me Help You

Obi Wan x Reader

Summary: Obi Wan isn’t very tech-savy, and he wants you to help him with his computer while you two sit in the Jedi Temple library. You offer your assistance, and decide to help him in other ways, too.

Warnings: smut, dub-con!!, male oral receiving, public oral sex

Word count: 2k

A/N: ⚠️please DO NOT read if you’re uncomfortable with dub-con. It’s not for everyone. (In this specific plot it’s used because Obi Wan is trying to be a good Jedi) Consent is slightly more clear right before the act.

This was requested by anon! Thanks lovely, hope you enjoy 💕

(my gif)

Obi Wan’s face became more frustrated by the second. You sat across from him in the Temple library. You’d joined your friend today because he wanted the company while he completed some tasks undoubtedly related to his Jedi duties.

“You alright?” You inquired, attempting to withhold a giggle at the sight of a man who is so usually calm becoming annoyed at technology.

“This datapad is going to drive me mad” he huffed. His fingers furiously tapped away at his attempted tasks.

“Sounds like a user-error” you teased him while continuing to stare at him. He looked up at you, obviously trying not to smile back. “And it’s a desktop computer, so, not technically a data pad” you jokingly corrected him.

“Well, whatever it is, it doesn’t like me very much” he remarked and returned his attention to the illuminated screen.

“What exactly are you trying to do?”

“I’m trying to navigate the archives here but it keeps telling me I’m typing in invalid coordinates” his voice grew more annoyed.

“Would you like my help?” You offered kindly

“No, that’s not necessary.” He politely declined.

You waited, not responding, knowing he’d change his mind after another failed attempt. His eyes shot upward at you across the table and quickly looked back down, but then hesitantly returned to your gaze.

“Maybe I could use your help, y/n” he finally admitted.

“Mhm, that’s what I thought” you rose from your seat and headed around the table. You observed the room, and no one was around. You hadn’t seen anyone in the library since you walked in. You could probably hear a pin drop in the vast silence. You came around behind his chair and leaned down next to him. Obi Wan’s eyes could not have been less discreet as they peered over to your chest that was now at his eye level. Your shirt was low cut, and perhaps a little too tight, but nothing you wouldn’t normally wear. You noticed but said nothing to Obi Wan, just flattered that he wanted to look.

“Let me try and enter the coordinates. What were they?” You inquired. He gave you the same numbers he had been typing in. You unfortunately found yourself having the same issue he was having. Obi Wan laughed, mocking you for thinking it was his fault.

“User-error, was it?” He teased you. You shook your head and giggled.

“Let me try something else” you said. You attempted other methods in order to make it work.

“Why don’t you pull up a chair?” He suggested.

You looked around, there were no chairs close, except for your chair on the other side of the table.

“Oh no, that’s alright” you shrugged, but then an idea crept into your devious, sexually deprived head. You checked your surroundings again, no one was in the library. It was late, anyways, so it wasn’t unusual.

Obi Wan’s lap sat there, open and empty, legs spread open, as if it was waiting on you to fill the space. You slowly moved your hips downward and over onto his thighs. He didn’t say a word, protest, or even make a sound, until you were fully seated on his unprepared lap.

“Oh, um...alright then” he stuttered, unsure what to say, but didn’t reject you either.

“Sorry, I saw a perfectly good seat and took it. That okay?” You clearly played innocent.

He roughly cleared his throat and breathed out hard. His built up sexual tension was obvious, and you preyed on it guiltlessly.

“No problem at all” he chuckled, finally responding to you. Continuing to work at the computer in your new found seat, you rotated your hips side to side subtly, pressing more firm into him. Hardly any time had passed before you felt him grow aroused under your ass. You smirked, loving the effect you were having on him.

“Oh, there we go, it worked!” you announced suddenly. The screen displayed the archive location that he searched for, after tweaking with the settings for a bit.

“What worked?” He breathed out, clearly more flustered than the last time he spoke. It was as if he was snapped out of a trance. He was incredibly distracted and couldn’t even recall for the moment what you were even helping him with.

“The...computer?” You stated the obvious, turning around sharply to meet his eyes.

“Right!” He shyly remembered.

His erection was continuing to grow and he wondered if you could feel it against you.

“Something wrong, Obi Wan?” You asked him, Both of you were fully aware of what was happening, but the lack of direct communication refused to acknowledge it plainly.

“Oh, I’m fine” He replied, clearing his throat again.

“You sure? You seemed flustered” You pushed the conversation further.

“Y-yes I'm, uh, I’m sure” he stumbled over his words.

“Seems like you’re having a hard time with your words there, Master Kenobi” you purred, wasting no time dancing around the idea. “Well, something is hard” you smirked, getting close to his face while sitting sideways across his thighs.

His breath hitched in his throat when he heard your voice turn sensual. Obi Wan said nothing because he wasn’t sure what to say. He wanted you, that you could tell, but a man that lived so strictly by the Jedi code would be hard to crack. And in public? He’d be insane to let you seduce him.

“Y/n...” he groaned deeply. His body language communicating how hard it was to restrain himself.

“Yes?” You whispered while moving your lips to his bare neck. You placed your lips at his supple skin and pecked slowly and lightly.

“As lovely as this is, I can’t” he protested. “It’s forbidden for me to engage in this, y/n, you know that”

Regardless, your lips continued working at his neck. A hum, almost resembling a moan, crawled from his mouth.

“You’re telling me, that if I got on my knees, right now, right here in front of you, that you wouldn’t want me to suck your cock?” You purred so softly directly into his ear. You observed the chills that cascading down his body and you smiled against his skin.

“Stars, y/n, I’ve never heard you talk like this” He avoided the question, his breathing still tense. You felt his hips buck slightly up into your weight.

“I know how stressed you are, Obi Wan, let me help you” you offered. He looked into your eyes for a moment. Desperation was hidden deep in his gaze. He wanted a release, but had to make a decision of his morality and his loyalty to the Jedi Order.

“You want to do that to me...here?” He inquired the absurdity of your offered actions and especially there in public. His tone was so innocent and clueless to your attraction to him.

“Oh, Master Kenobi, it’d be my pleasure” you called him by his formal name yet again, even though you’d only ever called him Obi Wan. You assumed it might turn him on. You were right.

You softly press your lips onto his. He received your lips hesitantly, but then eagerly. You moved to straddle him, placing both legs on either side of his hips. You pushed your hips forward, curling them into his bulge. Becoming more comfortable with your touch, Obi Wan’s lips danced with yours passionately.

Butterflies fluttered in your belly as you finally acted on your eager built up desires for him.

“But, y/n, the Council -” he began again, breaking the kiss, and still worried for his long list of ethical restrictions on his life.

“I don’t see them here...do you? And we both know Anakin doesn’t follow the rules, does he?” You persisted.

“Well, no. I suppose you’re right” he whispered back, laughing quietly at your comment. He was nervous, but it was impossible for him to hide his new hunger for your lips around his cock.

“Allow yourself some fun, Master”

“Y/n, I want to, but I’ve never done anything like this before” He admitted casually.

“Don’t worry, I’ll take good care of you” you sweetly assured him.

“Okay, darling, but I do believe we must make this quick” he finally fully accepted the idea, but looked quickly around the very large room to confirm you were alone together.

“Oh it won’t take me long at all” you winked at him.

Removing yourself from his lap, his eyes never left you as he was unsure of your next step. You got on your knees in front of him, as you promised. His hands eagerly fumbled to pull his trousers down. You met his hands halfway and took over.

His cock begged to be let free from its restraints. Once the cloth passed his full length, it sprung out and met your eye level. He was so adorably nervous. You released a moan at the sight of him exposed to you.

You wrapped your hand around him and the contact made him twitch. He breathed out heavily as he’d never been touched like this by another person. Your eyes met his lustful gaze. You raised your eyebrows, non verbally asking If he was ready. He nodded his head, and you proceeded.

Your lips parted widely to bring him into your mouth. Your eyes locked as you lowered your mouth completely down his length, taking all of him into you. A feeling so unfamiliar to him caused Obi Wan to grip the arm rest of the chair. He breathed in sharply, and exhaled the sweetest moan. Using the moisture from your mouth, you glided yourself up and down slowly.

“Oh my stars, y/n” he whispered. You two knew you still needed to be quiet, in case someone was close.

Obi Wan was so sensitive and touch starved beyond belief. No matter how hard he tried to muffle himself, he was unsuccessful. Your ears were graced with the delicate sounds escaping his lips as you brought him more pleasure than he’d ever experienced before.

“Fuck” he cried, already so close to his climax from your skilled motions. Vulgarity flying from him was a new sound to you and it earned a warm sensation inside of you.

An aching formed between your legs, a feeling of pleasure that was all too familiar to you. You wanted him to take you right then and there, but you’d surely get caught. Another time, you thought.

Removing your mouth to rest your jaw, you pumped your hands around him. You looked up at him, his eyes had still not broken contact with you while you created a euphoric form of pleasure for him for the first time.

“Y/n...” he whimpered

“Yes, Master Kenobi?” You cooed and smiled at him. He formed a grin down at you that quickly turned back into his O-face as you pumped him faster.

“I’m...oh my” he started, his body couldn’t stay still.

“Are you gonna cum for me?”

“Oh, yes, y/n. I’m so close. I’m gonna cum” he whined.

You returned the moisture of your mouth back to his cock and sloppily, yet rhythmically, sucked him continuously, responding to the way his body moved and the sound of his moans. The veins in his length twitched and his hips shifted.

Obi Wan threw his head back in ecstasy and just then you felt your throat become coated in his hot cum. The suppression of the growls that formed from his climax was intense and deep, somehow loud and quiet simultaneously.

You swallowed him up and removed your mouth from his sensitive parts. Obi Wan’s head was still laid back, you watched as his chest rose and fell with the effort to catch his breath.

“Was that alright?” You asked, giggling, knowing the answer already.

“Well, I...darling that was...incredible” he finally expressed in between his deep breaths.

You helped him pull his trousers back up and plant a kiss on his cheek as you stood.

“Glad I could be of some assistance for you tonight” you winked.

He was blushing, still in disbelief that you two just engaged in such an act. He was so precious and shy about the whole thing, but enjoyed every single second of it.

“Perhaps maybe I can help you next time, hm?” He suggested. You bite your lip, already growing eager for the next time you’d be alone with him.

Kinda wanna make a part 2??

#Obi Wan #Obi Wan Kenobi #Obi Wan x reader #Obi Wan Kenobi x reader #obi wan x fem!reader #Obi wan x male!reader #Obi wan x gender neutral reader #Obi wan smut #Obi wan Kenobi smut #Obi wan fluff #Star Wars smut #aotc #rots #tpm #my gif #Obi wan Kenobi gif #Obi wan gif #my work #scheduled

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sonoftatooine · 3 years

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Whumptober 2021

DAY 6: ‘TOUCH AND GO’ - TOUCH STARVED / HUNGER

Characters: Anakin Skywalker, Sheev Palpatine

Warnings: Abuse, starvation, solitary confinement

Summary: Prequel to my raised as a Sith Anakin AU where Anakin saves Padmé from execution by the Separatists, here, here and here. A young Vader defies his master, and he pays the price.

***

Curled up in the pitch darkness of the cell that his master had thrown him into three days past, Darth Vader, second apprentice to the Sith Lord Darth Sidious, wrestled down the urge to moan in pain as he wrapped his arms tight around his midriff in a futile attempt to soothe the gnawing ache deep in his stomach. It had been three days since he had been given even so much as half an old ration bar to eat. Three days since he had seen the slightest sliver of light or spoken to another being, organic or droid. Three days that he was only able to count because of the small ration of water he was given through a hatch in the wall what he presumed was each morning—enough to keep him alive but nowhere near what was needed to relieve the the dryness in his mouth, nor the unrelenting headache that was pounding behind his eyes and wrapping around his skull like a vice. He felt sick and dizzy, and he had to fight the instinct to cry. It would do him no good—it would only waste water.

Another groan threatened to escape him as a particularly severe pang of hunger laced through his abdomen. The familiar tang of blood filled his mouth as he bit down hard on his lip to suppress it. His master could well be monitoring him, and any display of weakness would do little to convince him to put an end to his punishment. He wondered how long the man intended to keep him here this time, without food, with barely any water. Surely...surely it wouldn't be much longer. It wouldn't— It couldn't— But his transgression—

Oh Force, his transgression had been really bad this time.

He hadn't meant to disobey. He hadn't. He hadn't defied his master in years—not after the first few times he had balked at being brought...fodder to feed his growing power in the Dark Side, as Lord Sidious liked to call it. But those had been criminals and scum and slavers, people whom nobody would miss and could best serve the Galaxy by perishing on his blade. The trembling padawan that had been dumped at his feet, barely able to hold the lightsaber she had been thrown straight as his master prowled around them, hissing at him to prove his mettle against the Jedi and strike her down—well, that had been...different. He had fought her, of course, and won easily, but when it came to strike the final blow, something had stayed his hand. The look in her eyes, perhaps, wide and terrified and full of tears. Or the fact that she must have been much the same age as he was—fifteen or sixteen, he thought? Whatever it was, it had frozen him stock still above her, his saber pointed towards her throat, and no amount of cajoling, taunting or threats from his master could make him draw back and deal the blow.

It had done her no good in the end. Lord Sidious had killed her in his place, and his rage afterwards had been terrible.

It had only been after he'd taken out the worst of his fury on his wayward apprentice that he had grabbed him by the hair, aching, hardly able to stand, and dragged him down to the small prison cell that he had first kept him in after he'd been stolen from Qui-Gon Jinn's custody on Naboo. The pain was tolerable—he had become accustomed to his master's cold but violent temper by now—but the cell... The cell always wore him down.

It was not necessarily the hunger and the thirst. Hunger and thirst were common even amongst the masters on Tatooine (with the notable exception of the Hutts), and amongst the planet's slaves even more so. Such things were well known to him, deep in his bones. But then, it had always been tempered by the loving embrace of his mother and the warm presence of his friends. Now, he had nothing like that. Only Tyranus, who loathed and resented him as an unnecessary waste of time and effort, and Sidious, whose touches brought pain more than comfort, and only offered him scraps of kindness as a reward for good behaviour. Here, in the dark, he only had misery and isolation and an ache in his gut that paled in comparison to the ache in his chest that was the absence of Shmi Skywalker. Like a hole that had been punched right through his heart.

Vader swallowed dryly as he tried, without success, to ease the soreness of his throat. He could feel a sudden surge of resentment growing within him, familiar and dangerous. It wasn't fair. Lord Sidious was as much Tyranus' master as he was his, but he never treated him this way. He didn't lock him up and starve him of both sustenance and sentient company. He let him see and speak to other people, didn't punish him for not bowing down like a slave to his owner in every aspect of his life. Yes, he was a lot younger than Tyranus—not yet even a man, the snobbish Count had a habit of sneering within his earshot—but both of them had become Sidious' apprentices at much the same time. He had been a Sith just as long as Dooku, and their shared master didn't even want the man as a permanent apprentice. So why was it him who was treated like—

His anger was well on the way to turning into a raging inferno by the time he managed to stamp it back down again. He mustn't think of such things. If he ever wanted to get out of this cell, he mustn't think of such things.

He had no way of knowing how much time passed before he heard the pneumatic hiss of his cell door being activated—it could have been minutes, hours. The sound was almost deafening after so long of silence, and the light which flooded into the cell from the other side of the door fairly blinded him. He blinked, dazed, stretching out his senses to identify who it was that was entering the cell. His mind brushed up against a horribly familiar presence, vast and cold and empty like a dark chasm in the Force. His master.

Still barely able to see, he scrambled to his knees, head bowed and properly subservient as he fought to keep himself from shaking. He could hear the hiss of soft robes dragging against the floor—the only warning he had before his chin was caught in a punishing grip, and his head was wrenched upwards to meet his master's gaze. Blinking away the spots in his vision, he stared up into what little he could see of Lord Sidious' face, shrouded in shadows, expression hard and cold with displeasure.

"Well, my apprentice," he croaked, his eyes gleaming like a hungry anooba's under the shadow of his hood. "Have you learnt your lesson yet?"

"Master..." Vader's throat was so parched that his voice was almost as dry and cracked as Lord Sidious'. He trembled under the man's gaze, trying to shrink in on himself and hating how pathetic he felt. "Master, please—"

Sidious' lips twisted into a wicked smile, teeth flashing dangerously.

"'Please'?," he taunted. "'Please' what, Vader? Do you believe you have paid sufficient penance for your transgression?"

Vader shut his eyes tight, forcing down the tears that were threatening to well up beneath his lids. He mustn't show weakness in front of his master. It would only make him angry.

Of course, disobedience made him angry too, and Vader had already shown him defiance beyond the limited patience with him the man possessed.

"I will accept your judgement, master" he said, because what else could he say when anything but complete subservience would mean further punishment? He wished his master would let go of his chin, so he could bow his head and hide from those piercing eyed behind a curtain of hair. But Sidious did not let him go, held firm and forced him to stare up into his twisted face, without reprieve. His gaze seemed to burrow into his skull like a laser, and Vader was sure that, without even bothering to call upon the Force, he could see past the lie he had so clumsily pasted over the truth of his feelings, even as he tried to bury them so deep down that no one—not even himself— would sense them. The man's smile turned grim and cold.

"Will you now?," he sneered. "How generous of you. And if I choose to keep you here until I deem you adequately punished? Will you accept it then?"

Vader trembled. He would do it, he knew. Lord Sidious was not in the habit of making idle threats.

"Master...," he whimpered hoarsely. "Master, please. Please forgive me. I-I'll obey. I've learnt my lesson. Please—”

Sidious smirked.

"Forgive you?"

The hand that had been holding his chin in a vice-like grip moved to slide up to his cheek in a gesture that, if not for his cruel words and the hard gleam in his yellow eyes, might have felt gentle, almost affectionate. Even as a worm of disgust—at himself as much as Sidious—twisted violently in his gut, Vader couldn't help but lean into the touch, desperate for even the tiniest scraps after so long in isolation. He wanted to shut his eyes—anything to pretend that he were somewhere else, with someone else—but he didn't dare. Not when one wrong move could turn the man back to icy fury at any moment.

"Perhaps I will forgive you." Sidious' fingers trailed down his cheek one last time before he drew back and suddenly, with only the slightest of warnings in the Force, struck him such a hard blow across the face that he toppled hard onto the floor. Vader let out a soft, startled little cry as pain jarred through his shoulder, his mechno hand shooting up to clutch at his burning cheek. "Once I believe you are properly contrite."

There was a whisper of robes above him and then something dropped down to the ground in front of his face. He blinked, dazed, at first not quite taking in what he was seeing. A ration bar. Oh Force, a ration bar. He scrambled to grab it, to snatch it up before his master took it away and—

But Sidious was already out in the corridor, and the door was closing behind him.

"Master!," Vader cried. His voice came out as a thin scream as he dashed to the already sealing door. He collided with it hard as he was caged once again in darkness. "Master—!"

For a moment, fear and anger and frustration welled up inside him to the point of explosion, and he let out a broken yell, slamming his metal hand into the durasteel of the door over and over. But it was not long before the exhaustion and sickness from his hunger overcame him and he sank down to the ground in a heap of dark robes and trembling misery. It wasn't fair. It wasn't fair—

But... But at least he had food now, he thought as he clutched the ration bar possessively to his chest. His master had given him food. Did that mean he was on his way towards forgiving him? Would he let him out soon? How soon? At least...at least, even if it was a few more days, he would have something to stave off the hunger. He could make it last. He could make it last until his master decided to let him out. Yes.

All he needed to do was obey—truly obey—and then Lord Sidious would show him mercy.

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dameronology · 4 years

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things we lost in the fire {obi-wan x reader}

summary: on a slow morning in tatooine, you and obi-wan reflect on how lucky you are to still have each other

warnings: swearing, angst, mentions of death

another obi fic based on a bastille song?? more likely than you think!! but i swear, despite, all the warnings, this isn’t going to rip your heart out completely

enjoy,

- val xx

Things had never been darker.

The stars still shone at night, silvers and steels and greys against the canvas of the midnight sky. The sun still came up everyday - doubly so on Tatooine. You woke up every morning to the twin suns blaring down on your new home, illuminating the place with a hauntingly golden glow. For a place that seemed to be so fundamentally built on black and white beliefs - good and bad, right and wrong, light and dark - the world seemed too bright.

The stars shone at night. The sun still came up every day. The world seemed bright - but things had never seemed darker.

You missed the life you had - no, you didn’t just miss it. You yearned for it. You ached for it. You wanted to wake up one of these particularly hot Tatooine mornings to find everything was just a dream; that Anakin was alive, that Padme was alive, that you still had a temple to come home to. Everything you’d ever loved had been thrown into the fiery pits of Mustafar, left to burn and turn to ash.

Well, not everything.

You still had Obi-Wan Kenobi and you thanked the stars everyday for it.

It was clear that he was hurting too - there was always a tinge of pain in his sarcastic quips, a sense of tiredness in his eyes whenever they creased with laughter. He was doing it for you, staying strong for you. He was holding you both up - after all, helping people was all he knew. Even when he’d lost everything, that didn’t change.

Searching for positives was hard and after desperately seeking, you’d found a few.

You were no longer sneaking around, so you could walk hand-in-hand through the winding streets of your local market together. You could lay-in every morning, not worried about meetings or missions or operations. The pressure to be a good Jedi was off and now you could just be together. It wasn’t much - but at the same time, it was everything.

It was a warm morning on Tatooine; the suns were high in the sky, even though it was barely 7AM. You were sprawled out on your mattress, sheets tangled in your legs from where you’d kicked them off in the night. The sunlight was streaming through the cracks in the curtains, showering you in a warm glow as you lazily stretched. You rolled over on your side, eyes falling on the half-awake man next to you.

Obi-Wan’s eyes were vacantly staring at the ceilings, lids heavy with post-sleep tiredness. Having sensed that you were awake, he lazily reached a hand out towards you, covering yours where it was splayed out on the mattress. You tangled your fingers with his, lighting squeezing his hand.

‘You’re thinking about him, aren’t you?’ You quietly murmured.

‘Always.’ He whispered back.

You felt that - you really felt that. Anakin was always on your mind; not Darth Vader, not the twisted, dark person he’d become. Anakin. The cocky Jedi, the one who you’d called your best friend for years. He hadn’t died in the physical sense but emotionally and mentally, he was long gone. He’d gone insane trying to protect the woman he loved and he wasn’t coming back.

You didn’t necessarily understand. You never could, but you were able resonate with his innate desire to stop at nothing for Padme. You would have crossed the galaxy ten times over and back to protect the man you loved. The panic you felt in the moments after Order 66, not knowing if Obi-Wan had survived was going to stick with you for a long time.

The way you held each other, after colliding into one another in the middle of a jet? The way you cried, relief washing over you despite the fact that every you’d ever known was gone? That’s when you knew that you were never going to stray away from him again. Everything you’d argued about, everything you’d ever worried about or bickered about suddenly seemed so menial. It was the peak definition of not knowing what you had until you’d almost lost it.

But you hadn’t lost him - you’d got lucky. He’d got lucky too.

‘I miss him too.’ You said. You softly brushed a few strands of hair out of his face, your free hand still holding his. ‘And I hate to say it, but there’s nothing we can do.’

You hated having to be the voice of reason - that had always been Obi-Wan’s job. It felt like a bit of a dick move to remind him that you could never return to your former life, but reality was harsh. It was a goddamned bitch. The acceptance of the situation had hit you like a ton of bricks and you couldn’t make it any easier for Obi-Wan. You wished that you could; that you could take his pain away and turn it into something better. All you could do was guide him through it in the same way he’d done for you every time that you’d been hurting throughout the years.

‘I know.’ Obi-Wan finally turned to look at you, a forced smile playing on his lips. ‘I can’t help but think would what have happened if-’

‘- don’t think about the ifs.’ You cut him off. ‘Try as you might but you can’t change the past.’

‘I wish I could.’

You leant forward, pressing a kiss to his cheek. ‘I know.’

With that, you shuffled out of bed, reaching down to grab a shirt. You pulled it over your head and slipped on your shoes, peaking over your shoulder at him as you did. You tried to give him a reassuring smile, but it faltered slightly.

For once, you were trying to be the strong one. He had been your driving force for so long, the reason that you’d got out of bed in the morning. If you hadn’t had him after everything that had happened? You didn’t know where you’d be. You probably owed it to him to take the weight of everything for once.

‘I’m gonna go make some caff.’ You said.

‘I’ll be out in a moment.’

You stood up, the footsteps of your unlaced boots echoing off the walls as you headed through to the kitchen. Your dwelling was humble; big enough for both of you (and more, if that was what the future held). It felt like home for no other reason than the fact Obi-Wan was there with you.

After assembling a semi-decent cup of caff, you kicked open your front door and headed outside. There was a small bench at the front of the house, overlooking the village ahead. The early morning sun was beating down on you, the air fresh and untainted. The day felt new - full of hope, despite everything.

Pulling your knees up to your chest, you cupped the warm drink between your hands. The road ahead of you was still empty - most people around here were older, retired or out of employment. They didn’t rise until much later in the morning - you wished you were capable of that, but years as a Jedi had drilled early starts into your system.

‘I don’t always think about the past.’

The sound of Obi-Wan’s voice announced his present.

‘Yeah?’ You replied, tilting your head to face him. He was stood in the doorway, leaning against the frame. He had a cup of caff in one hand and a book in the other. ‘So what do you think about?’

‘You.’

Tossing the book to the doorstep with a dusty thump, the Jedi moved to take a set next to you. He reached his arm out towards you and without having to say anything, you dropped your feet to the floor and fell into his side. He pressed a kiss to your temple, hand gently carding through your hair.

It was so domestic - so simple, so suburban and ordinary. But, behind your small gestures of affection and words of love, there were galaxies of grief. The place you were now might have seemed peaceful and quiet but the journey to get there had been anything but. Between you, you’d experienced enough loss and enough pain to last ten lifetimes.

‘That’s a grand statement.’ You shot back.

‘A grand statement for a grand person.’

‘Oh, you always have been a sweet talker.’ You chuckled.

‘I mean it.’ He replied. ‘I don’t say often enough how grateful I am for you.’

You peered up at him, a small sigh escaping your lips. ‘You don’t have to.’

‘I should though.’

‘And so should I.’ You shot back. ‘You have done everything for me since the day we met, Obi. I owe you so much-’

‘- you don’t owe me anything, darling.’ He softly murmured. ‘Simply staying by my side has put me in a lifetime of debt.’

You almost laughed at the thought of doing anything else. Staying with Obi-Wan had never even been a question - you were already packing your bags before he could even finish saying I’m moving to Tatooine. Neither of you had any idea where you were going, nor what you were doing. But, just like everything else, you were going to figure it out together.

‘We’ll call it even.’ You leant up to kiss him, lips brushing against his.

‘I talk about what I’ve lost.’ He murmured, forehead resting on yours. ‘Anakin, Padme, the Jedi.’

That was the first time he’d said his name his everything had happened. It hurt - maker, it hurt - but the proud look on your face when it happened was almost enough to make it worth it.

‘But I never talk about what I still have.’ He added. ‘You.’

‘You don’t need to talk about it.’ You shook your head. ‘I know the feeling.’

‘You do?’

‘Of course.’ You replied. ‘I think about that day all the time and all I can remember is that you were my first concern. I could only focus on finding you, on making sure that you were okay.’

‘You mean everything to me.’ Obi-Wan admitted. ‘You always have but even more so now.’

He hadn’t mean to become attached to you, even less so to indulge his addiction. Years ago, when you were both still sworn to a code, it had been hard. Choosing you over the very Order that he’d committed has life too had been a struggle - but now? He’d never been more grateful that he’d chosen you.

‘It’s the same for you.’ You offered him a watery smile. ‘Guess we’re kinda stuck together, huh?’

‘Even if you strayed to the other side of the galaxy, we still have a Force connection.’ He reminded you. ‘So yes - I suppose we are stuck together.’

Obi-Wan was your backbone; the glue that held you together these days. It was easy to look at him as though he hung the stars in the sky - and as far as you were concerned, he did. You were living in dark times but he felt like the light at the end of the tunnel.

And, little did you know, but he felt the same. Having you by his side meant more to you than you’d ever realised. There was one specific second on the day of Order 66 that he held onto: the moment you met again, the moment that you tossed yourself towards him, not caring about whether or not he was going to catch you. That was when, despite everything, that he felt like things were going to be okay.

The stars still shone at night. The sun still came up everyday. It felt like you were the reason why.

tags: @cherieboba @valkyriesandbrokenhalos @cptnrex501 @thespareoom

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dankmemes-of-dantooine · 4 years

Text

Shoulder Your Burden (part two)

Alright everyone this is where the angst and thirst get kicked up a notch. You’ve been warned. Stay tuned for part three.

Part 1 Part 3 Part 4

“Inappropriate use of the for-“ Obi-Wan’s steady voice hummed from the door way. Anakin didn’t turn to him.

“I know, I know.” Anakin cut him off good naturedly, waving him off.

Anakin remained there for a time, focusing on his breathing. He could hear the older Jedi rummaging around in the kitchen, no doubt already set to work whipping up those Ruby Bliels. Anakin smiled at that, humming a contented sigh.

“Anakin, are these droid parts in the sink? You can’t get mech grease in the drain, you’ll wreck the plumbing in the whole temple.”

Anakin could hear metallic clatter of the parts being moved and he chuckled to himself.

“Don’t touch my stuff!”

He called, eyes still closed. He really wasn’t meditating anymore, as much as stilling his mind and enjoying the banter.

He could hear Obi-Wan sigh dramatically from the kitchen and he stifled a laugh.

He stretched his arms out high above him and rolled his shoulders, attempting to relax out all the knots he’d developed from the weeks of hard combat.

Obi-Wan rounded the corner with drinks just then, taking a seat next to him on the floor, setting their drinks on the low table.

Anakin nodded appreciatively, taking a sip from his drink, and looking out through the large window.

The room was thick with knowing silence.

“We don’t have to talk about what happened today…” Obi-Wan began after a time,

“Good,” Anakin said curtly, taking another sip,

“...but I know that it troubles you.”

Anakin drew his bottom lip between his teeth, chewing it pensively for a moment.

Images from the days events bombarded his mind, his men dying, the blaster fire, the smell, Maker, the smell that had made him sick earlier, Dozer, leaving Dozer, he couldn’t save Dozer-

“I might as well have killed them myself,” he croaked, voice higher and more reedy than he had intended. He shook his head and cleared his throat, trying to quiet the drumming of his heart beat in his ears.

He turned his face away, staring out the broad window again.

“How do you think I feel? I did the same thing! I’ve made countless mistakes! My men died too,” Obi-Wan reached, trying desperately to appeal to his former student in any way he could.

“It’s different,” he spat, disheartened to find his lip quivering.

“How is it different?” Obi-Wan sounded incredulous now, he always thought Anakin was so ridiculous.

Anakin's cheeks burned as he turned to face his master.

“The council knows you're a capable Jedi master! The view me as an overgrown youngling,” he snapped bitterly, mortified as a tear tracked its way down his cheek.

“Anakin, they would’ve never given you a command if they didn’t think you capable, be reasonable-“

“I’m so unreasonable, aren’t I, Master?” he stood now, turning away from Obi-Wan,

“So unreasonable, I caused half my men to die.”

He choked back a half sob, swallowing thickly, blinking as tears ran down his face. Why was he like this? Why did things cause him to become unglued and weep in front of his master this way? Shame burned deep in his belly and his cheeks flushed vividly.

“Anakin-“

“Stop.”

Please.

Obi-Wan was reaching, pushing feelings of acceptance, support, through their force bond.

Anakin shook his head, suffering against the urge to sob into his elbow.

He heard Obi-Wan get to his feet but he made no move to turn to him, shame and embarrassment freezing him to his spot in front of the window.

He felt thin and fragile, like winter’s first ice, as though at any moment, any little thing could shatter him.

The lights of transports and speeders flashed vividly outside, and Anakin wondered numbly if anyone was looking in at him coming undone in his living room. He tried to let himself be hypnotized by the vibrant colors out on the street outside but he couldn’t think of anything except screams, the burnt flesh, the smell-

Obi-Wan placed a firm hand on his shoulder, turning him to face him.

Anakin resisted at first, trying to shrug out of the grip, but his master rubbed reassuring circles into his shoulder, like he had earlier, and it made his knees wobble. His heart skipped, and another silent tear tracked itself down his cheek.

He slid to the floor, collapsing on his knees.

Obi-Wan followed, sitting on the floor next to him, pulling Anakin’s head to his chest.

Anakin came completely unseamed, his wails muffled by Obi-Wan robes.

The older man brought a hand to his hair, soothingly picking through the curls as Anakin cried.

He shushed him, rubbing wide circles onto his back.

I’m sorry, Master, sorry sorry sorry

Shh. What are you sorry for? Hush.

Couldn’t save them. Couldn’t help them couldn’t couldn’t couldn’t I couldn’t-

“Dozer,” Anakin choked out, swallowing thickly against the ragged breaths he was sucking in like a man half drowned.

“I know, dear one, shh,” Obi-Wan said miserably, remembering fondly the times Dozer had assisted Anakin in various mischief and pranks. They weren’t meant to have favorites, but Obi-Wan had long suspected that Dozer ranked amongst those Anakin most treasured. But he cared about all of his men. It was his great strength and also his hamartia, his compassion.

Anakin had begun to compose himself, but sat sniffling, collapsed against Obi-Wan like a pile of wet laundry.

He radiated shame and mortification, feeling totally burned out and embarrassed he’d sobbed loudly into his Master’s chest like a youngling throwing a tantrum.

His walls were down, and he know Obi-Wan was picking up on his misery through their bond.

“Quit that,” Obi-Wan said softly, pressing a kiss to Anakin’s temple, “you lost a friend today. You’re permitted to be upset.

Anakin’s brain though, was short circuiting. Had Obi-Wan just kissed him? I mean, he had, but had he ever done that before? Suddenly Anakin couldn’t remember. He’d never felt like this before, so simultaneously burned out and horrified, and yet safe and cared for. And to his mortification, aroused heat thrummed low in his belly, and his stomach fluttered.

He looked up bleary eyed at Obi-Wan, tears still sticking his eyelashes together.

Confusion churned his brain, and he was too emotionally overstimulated to really process what was happening.

“Did you just, kiss me, Obi-Wan?” he asked, dazed, voice raw and raspy from the tears and overexertion.

Obi-Wan smiled, this time a flush darkening his own cheeks, still gently massaging his padawans scalp. He shrugged.

Anakin cleared his throat, looking away, heart thrumming in his ears, a deep blush curling up his neck to his cheeks and the tops of his ears before he could even utter the words,

“Would you do it again?”

His Master obliged him, pressing another chaste kiss to his forehead and Anakin made a sound of protest, nuzzling into Obi-Wan's neck.

“What, then?” Obi-Wan had meant to ask it humorously, if not a bit patronizingly, but his voice came out as a thin whisper.

Anakin swallowed thickly and pressed a kiss to Obi-Wan’s jaw, causing the older man to tense up.

Obi-Wan cleared this throat.

“Come on then, dear one, I think you need sleep. It’s been quite the day, hasn’t it.”

Obi-Wan moved to stand, pulling Anakin up with him, but Anakin felt as though the entire world had just come crashing down upon his head.

He suddenly felt cold and naked, like he’d just stepped out of the ‘fresher but his towel was across the room.

He didn’t want to go to bed. He didn’t want Obi-Wan to leave.

The last thing he wanted was to be left here alone with his thoughts.

“I won’t be able to sleep, Master,” he said, only thinly disguising his misery. He had intended to follow up the sentence with ‘stay and play a round of Dejarik with me,’

But Obi-Wan had opened his mouth before he got the chance.

“I can stay with you, if you’d like.”

“What?”

“I can stay...if you’d sleep better.”

Obi-Wan was referring to his nightmares, which did tend to plague him after days like today. He hadn’t offered to stay with him while he slept since he was a young padawan, though.

“Obi-Wan, I could never ask you to-“

“Nonsense. It’ll save you the midnight trip across the temple to come knocking on my door at an ungodly hour requesting a game of Sabacc, anyhow.”

“You’re only just down the hall, Master.”

“At any rate, I’ll be right here, if you should need a midnight game of Sabacc.”

Anakin's heart thumped and he pulled Obi-Wan in for another long embrace.

“Thank you, Master.”

————————-

Obi-Wan did stay with him in his apartment that night, though to Anakin’s secret chagrin, he insisted on staying on the couch. Anakin slept through the first night, mind quieted just knowing his master was in the other room. He was morose and self hating that next day, and after filling their day with sparring and saber practice in an attempt to take his mind off things, Obi-Wan offered to stay a second night.

The fitful sleep, however, started that second night.

Obi-Wan was awakened in the night in a cold sweat by Anakin issuing a full on scream in his sleep. Obi-Wan rushed back to his room, half expecting to find him being eaten alive or flayed by an intruder, but instead, found the younger Jedi upright in bed with his knees pulled to his chest.

He’d sat with him and consoled him, playing an obligatory game of Sabacc, (Anakin let him win,) making sure Anakin was drifting off to sleep before making his way back to the couch. He hesitated in the doorway before returning the the bedside and pressing a tentative kiss to Anakin’s forehead.

Anakin had been feigning sleep, peaking through one eye like a mischievous child. Curiosity had gotten the best of him in that moment, and his heart thumped so loudly he was worried he’d give himself away.

The third night was much the same, although rather than screams, Anakin seemed to be crying in his sleep. It was a low, whimpering, pitiful sound, one that was broken and hollow.

It wrenched at Obi-Wan's heart. He sat next to him on the bed and waited for the younger man to awaken on his own, for fear of startling him and making things worse.

Anakin came to with a start, still whimpering, sleepy shame permeating their force bond as he realized, with embarrassment, Obi-Wan had been watching him cry.

“None of that, dear one,” he’d said softly, sitting with him until his breathing evened out. Wrung out, Anakin sighed loudly from his spot, his breath tickling Obi-Wan’s neck. Obi-Wan suppressed a smile, watching as his former student slithered back into bed, sleep making his usually graceful movements clumsy and heavy.

Obi-Wan had stood to take his place on the couch after a time, when he was reasonably certain that Anakin was asleep.

“Wait,” Anakin murmured softly. Obi-Wan froze, heart hammering in his chest.

“Yes, dear one?”

Anakin hesitated.

“Will you stay? I think I might sleep better if- if-“

Anakin flushed, stammering through the sleepy plea. He couldn’t even believe he was asking. He was halfway to perishing the thought with a hurried ‘nevermind’ when Obi-Wan interrupted his thoughts.

“Alright, alright,” Obi-Wan murmured, taking his place on the far side of the bed, leaving a good deal of space between them.

“Goodnight.”

————————-

Obi-Wan awoke hazily as the mid morning sun curled through the blinds and fell in long rays across his face. He’d slept much later than he typically did.

Blinking wearily, he realized that some time in the night, Anakin had curled against his side, and now slept soundly there, snoring quietly.

He smiled.

He’d always slept just like that, ever since he was young, curled into a little ball on his side, like a Loth-Cat.

Now though, Anakin’s head was nuzzled up under Obi-Wan’s chin, making it exceedingly difficult to extricate himself without waking the young knight.

He gently peeled Anakin off of him, wiggling out from under the man as best he could. Anakin had gotten heavy since the last time they’d so closely occupied the same space, and a pang of nostalgia whistled through him as he looked at the young man sprawled sleepily out on the bed before him. So grown, and grown up so fast, and yet-

He did look so vulnerable just now, Obi-Wan thought, without the lines of worry and frustration creasing his brow. The morning light streamed in through the blinds and made Anakin’s hair seem to glow, haloing his tanned, scarred face. Obi-Wan smiled and resisted the urge to reach out and brush his fingers along the young man’s cheek.

Obi-Wan tore his eyes away from his cherubic sleeping padawan, carefully and adeptly stepping around the droid parts that littered Anakin’s room. Obi-Wan chuckled, rolling his eyes. Always tinkering.

Obi-Wan made a silent retreat, planning on making the most of the day he had left.

———————————————————

Anakin awoke some time later, feeling more relaxed and well rested than he had in a good while. The sun was high, and he guessed it was nearly midday.

He stood and stretched before going to rinse off in the shower.

He started the water, and began to undress.

He inhaled deeply. His sleeping clothes smelled of Obi-Wan. He flushed, hazy memories of cozy warmth flooding his senses. He ached for that touch back.

A shiver ran up his spine as he imagined himself curled up in Obi-Wan’s lap, that deep, clean linen smell permeating all of the air around him.

He shook his head.

No.

Jedi aren’t permitted to form attachments.

And then too, the training bond they shared was supposed to have been eradicated when he was knighted, and neither of them had said anything about it staying. And yet there it was, as plain as the nose on his face, a golden thread connecting core of his mind and emotions to Obi-Wan. It buzzed and hummed all day, a comfortable familiar aura that he clung to as a child would a security blanket they were not yet ready to relinquish. And anytime he felt uncertain, he would almost instinctively tug at Obi-Wan’s mind, asking for a little reassurance.

Lately however, finding themselves deployed to the far flung corners of the galaxy, they spent a good deal of time very, very far apart. In recent months, Anakin had felt their connection begin to dull, and he wasn’t sure if it was a result of them being so separated, or an intentional decision on Obi-Wan’s part to begin the technically overdue process of severing their bond.

Obi-Wan was never the best at verbal affirmation. It left Anakin feeling like his Master secretly resented having him as a student, having been thrust upon him in the moment of tragedy immediately following Jinn’s death.

He hardly gave any hint of what he was feeling, Obi-Wan’s signature was always so sturdy and constant. Even in the moments when Obi-Wan was really exasperated with him, he kept those parts hidden from Anakin, and Anakin knew Obi-Wan thought him to be a dangerous liability. He had overheard him tell Qui-Gon that when he was only a child. There was always that dark little voice in Anakin’s head telling him that Obi-Wan never really wanted him, and it devastated him.

It was so hard to tell. Obi-Wan’s force signature always felt so warm and steady, like afternoon lake waters on Naboo. It glowed and hummed with a positive shine, only seldom soured by minor inconveniences and irritations. In those times, it made Anakin laugh. Sometimes he would say or do some obtuse, ridiculous thing, just feel his masters mind flex and spin around it as he tried to tamp down on his irritation. He secretly relished the moments his trick flying would give Obi-Wan vertigo, just so he could feel the dizzy spirals radiate from his mind with an irritated cut it out.

And Obi-Wan, well meaning as he was, tortured him with their bond, daily when they were together. He’d brush against the corners of Anakin’s mind like a cat, leaving feather light touches of reassurances and affection. He knew Anakin needed them. And yet everywhere Obi-Wan’s force signature grazed his own, a dull wanton need poured like magma into his belly.

But he needed him to say them. He needed to be able to see his eyes and know he wasn’t just projecting pretty lies in his mind to keep him placated. And at the very least he couldn’t lose the bond they did have. He couldn’t.

He chewed his lip.

Maybe that was why everything felt so overwhelming. They had spent a good deal of time apart, only to be thrown together into a disastrous situation that had left them dependent on each other for survival. (Nothing new there.) He thanked stars Obi-Wan had pulled him into that transport.

Not that he hadn’t saved Obi-Wan a time or two (or nine) since the war began, but-

He shook his head, the steam curling around his ears.

Mmm, hot water. He liked his showers nearly unbearably hot. It helped take his mind off things.

And yet-

It took everything he had not to drape himself over Obi-Wan like a velvet curtain. He craved touch, affection, want. He wanted to to he wanted. Maybe that’s why the idea of losing their bond terrified him.

The water poured over Anakin’s face and down his back as he tried to push the feeling away.

He wasn’t permitted to form attachments and he damn sure wasn’t permitted to form them to his master.

He’s only trying to placate me, keep me calm. He thinks I’m reckless, foolish, dangerous, he thought to himself.

He missed spending day in and day out with his master.

He remembered being knighted in a rush, due to the Republic needing Jedi Generals to command battalions of clone troopers, and overnight suddenly the man he was used to spending all day with being systems away. The mixed pride and terror his first day as a knight had curled in his stomach like a vine snake, but he had pushed it down and beamed, and felt Obi-Wan’s pride sear through their bond.

Anakin imagined the feel of Obi-Wans lips against his temple and he nearly whimpered. Proud of me, he thought. He imagined those lips moving their way down his jaw to his throat, and he whined, letting the hot water pour over his body.

I can’t.

A shiver rippled down his spine all the way to his toes, despite the hot water.

He imagined Obi-Wan’s lips at his throat, his hands at his waist, his-

He whined, arousal pounding low in his belly and between his legs.

He trailed his hands down the tanned planes of his torso, chewing his lip at the sensation.

Imagining they were Obi-Wan’s hands.

His cock twitched at the thought, and he gasped, biting down on his lip to keep quiet.

He lazily wrapped a hand around his length, remembering the feeling of Obi-Wan’s lips against his temple, so chaste, and yet-

He imagined Obi-Wan pulling him into his lap and running his warm calloused hands over his thighs, his beard tickling Anakin's cheek as he whispered into his ear

“Dear one, my good boy-“

Anakin gasped, quickening his pace.

No. I...can’t. Not to...Obi-Wan...

But he couldn’t stop. His whole body sung with electricity at the thought. It was so wrong, and for some reason that made it feel so forbidden and-and

He loved Obi-Wan. Maker, he loved him. Stars, he wasn’t allowed to love him, but all he could think of was Obi holding him and rolling his hips into him and-

He came with a wrung out moan, gasping as he braced his arm against the wall of the shower. His knees wobbled and his head swam with the thick realization that he had just brought himself off to the thought of his master- the thought of Obi-Wan…

He shook his head, heat flooding his cheeks as he rinsed himself off. No no no.

He had to get this out of his head.

He donned his robes and decided he would go and meditate in a quiet place in the temple. Somewhere that didn’t smell like Obi-Wan.

—————————————

Thanks for tuning in to part two 🤪 I have more written and there’s more to come. Probably gonna end up being a four parter on here. I overestimated the length of text posts tumblr will let me create. If you want an easier, more streamlined way to read, it’ll also be here on AO3. Thanks all!

Tagging: @haydens-moles @chokemeanakin @anakinswhore @fistmebuckyskywalker

*if you wanna be added or removed from the tag list just lmk ✨*

#star wars #anakin skywalker #obi wan #obi wan and anakin #star wars fanfiction #obikin #if I tagged you and you don’t want to be tagged just lmk.#or if you would like to be added to the list #just shoot me a DM #thanks all

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nikki-writes-stuff · 4 years

Text

Reprogrammed

Pairing: Sith!Obi-Wan Kenobi x Padawan!Reader

Summary: After being captured by the infamous Darth Valor on a mission, you find yourself completely at the mercy of a Sith Lord who’s determined to seduce you to the Dark Side.

A/N: Hey, friends! SO, fun story, while I was in college, I had this fanfic called Struggling Against Me, and it was my first ever Sith!Obi-Wan reader insert. In that story, Obi-Wan’s Sith name is Darth Valor, and since it’s still my most popular fic on Ao3, I thought I’d revisit his character, only this time he’s even darker. I hope you guys enjoy it! Let me know what you think and if you’d be interested in more Darth Valor stories. :)

Warning: This fic contains non-con, rape, and dub-con, along with general force fuckery. Read at your own risk! And enjoy, if you’re into that sort of thing (like yours truly).

Sweat was trickling down the back of your neck, and you shivered as it trailed down your spine. You didn’t know where you were; you had woken up blindfolded, naked, and alone hours ago. You’d called out until your voice was hoarse, but it had been of no use; no one had answered you, and you could sense no life forms within the force.

After overcoming the initial shock, you’d managed to calm down enough to assess your surroundings; from the low humming throbbing consistently through the air, you could tell that you were on a star ship. Your hands were bound in handcuffs behind your back, and while your connection to the force hadn’t been completely severed, the fact that you couldn’t use it to remove your bonds told you that they were made out of some sort of force-suppressant material.

The floor beneath you was cold and hard, clearly made out of metal, and you shivered as you drew yourself first up onto your knees, and then to your feet. Your head was pounding as you hesitantly took a step forward, then another, until you were walking blindly in a straight line. After a few seconds of stumbling, you bumped into a steel wall, and you turned and began trudging forward again.

You encountered no furniture as you walked the perimeter of the room, and you estimated that the space you were in was about the size of one of the bathrooms back at the Jedi temple on Coruscant. You felt a flash of panic well up within you; did your fellow Jedi know where you were?

From somewhere close, you heard the whoosh of a door opening followed by slow, steady footsteps. The door slid shut behind whoever it was who’d just entered your cell, and for a moment, the room was completely silent, save for the sound of your own breathing. And then, a voice.

“Hello, there.”

You bit your lip to stop it from trembling as you futilely reached into the force; but, no matter how hard you searched, you still could sense no nearby lifeforms.

“Don’t embarrass yourself, love,” the man chuckled, this time from right in front of you. “You will not find my force signature if I don’t want you to.”

You jerked backwards, tripping over your own feet until your back collided roughly with a wall. You leaned against it heavily, trying to steady your breathing as whoever it was strode towards you.

“Tell me, Padawan,” he murmured, “what is your name?”

You remained silent, your instincts screaming at you that something was off about this man. You’d never felt the force react this way to a presence before; it was as if it were holding its breath, waiting in eager anticipation for whatever was about to happen next.

“Come now, young one,” he purred, and you whimpered as you felt warm breath fan over your face. “There’s no harm in telling me your name, now is there?”

Warm fingertips grazed your cheek, and your body jolted so hard that your teeth clattered together. A warm chuckle sounded from right in front of you, and you shrunk back as another hand came to rest on your bare hip.

“Would it help,” he whispered, “if I told you mine?”

A presence prodded at your mind, and your lips parted in shock as you finally caught a glimpse of his force presence. And what you sensed…terrified you.

You’d never felt a darkness so profound, but you’d felt something close to it once. Once, only a few months after Mace Windu had taken you on as his padawan, you’d been sent on a mission to Bal’demnic, and you’d gone with your master to a village that had been built at the top of the planet’s highest cliff. The village chief had offered a room in his own home for the two of you to stay in, and when you first discovered that his house had been built right into the side of the cliff, you’d been charmed.

But the first night you stayed there, you’d had trouble sleeping, and you decided to meditate on the balcony until your thoughts settled down. Or, rather, that had been your original idea. But after taking one look over the side of the balcony under the black of night, you’d gone retreating back to your bed, trying to dispel the feeling of vertigo that had suddenly overtaken your senses.

Now, as the Sith’s presence pressed against yours, you were reminded of the overwhelming darkness that you’d seen over the edge of that cliff. It was total, absolute, and you shivered as tendrils of it started tapping at your mental walls, curiously seeking entry within.

“My name,” he whispered, lips pressed against your ear, “is Darth Valor. But you Jedi once knew me by another name.”

It was as if someone had poured ice water down your back; no, it couldn’t be. Anxiety swelled in your chest until you felt as if you would choke on it, and you were vaguely aware that your hands were starting to shake. It couldn’t be.

“…Obi-Wan Kenobi,” you breathed, uttering the name under your breath.

The Council had never confirmed it, but it had been a rumor among the ranks of the Jedi for years. Obi-Wan Kenobi had been a legend ever since he’d battled Darth Maul and won, managing to save the life of his master Qui-Gon Jinn in the process. You’d only been 15 at the time, but you could still remember the excitement he’d caused. He’d been the first person in a thousand years to kill a Sith, and the Council had even allowed him to bypass his trials, leading to him being knighted that very same week.

From there, Qui-Gon Jinn had moved on to train young Anakin Skywalker, and Kenobi had immediately been thrown into knighthood. But something happened just a year later; the young Jedi suddenly vanished while he was out on a mission, leaving no trace behind, no clue as to what could have happened to him.

For many years, it was widely accepted that he’d died in a tragic accident, but recently, sightings of a new Sith Lord had occurred with increasing frequency. More and more Jedi were claiming to see a man who called himself Darth Valor on the battlefield, and those who were able to remember Obi-Wan claimed that he looked just like him.

And, as you felt fingers slip into your hair and untie the cloth covering your eyes, you soon discovered that they had been right. After blinking to adjust to the sudden influx of light, you saw standing in front of you the living legend you’d heard so much about.

He had grown a beard since you’d seen him last, and his hair was longer, curling just below his ears in gentle waves, but there was no denying that he was the man who’d once been a padawan, just like you. His eyes were far from the crystalline blue they used to be, though; they were now an unnatural, sickly gold, and as he leaned closer to you, you could just barely make out a ring of crimson bordering his pupils.

A smirk twisted his lips as he regarded you, and you suddenly became acutely aware of your nakedness. He was draped in yards of burgundy and black fabric, coming together in a luxurious look that vaguely resembled Jedi robes, and you, by comparison, were completely bare, save for the handcuffs keeping your hands secured against the small of your back.

“Now, then,” he sighed, one of his hands coming back up to your cheek, “I’ve told you my name. It’s only fair that you tell me yours.”

You gulped, and though your trembling lips formed the shape of your name, no noise left your throat. A wicked grin curled over Valor’s features, and he arched an eyebrow as he leaned over you, his cloak brushing against your nipples, already hard from the cold.

“Cat got your tongue, sweet one?” he purred, and you clenched your hands hard enough to feel the bite of your nails against your palm’s flesh.

After taking a deep breath, you finally managed to murmur your name under your breath in stilted syllables, hoping that it would at least get the man to back off. But, instead, he only repeated your name, managing to make it sound like something scandalous as he pronounced it in his velvety tone. You noticed that his breath smelled of cigarettes and whiskey, but the scent managed to blend well with the spicy cologne he was wearing. He smiled, tilting his head to the side and letting his eyes trail over your face, down to your body, and then back up to your own gaze once again.

You shifted on your feet and pressed your thighs together so hard that they shook from how tight your muscles were drawn. His presence was slowly starting to wrap around yours, and it was growing more and more insistent to be let in. You felt him testing your mental walls, as if he were searching them for a weak spot. The strain of keeping him out was already making you tremble, and yet he didn’t look like he was breaking a sweat. In fact, he gave you a smile that could only be described as pitying before he parted his lips to speak.

“Well, young one,” he sighed, “today really isn’t your day.”

With that, the tendrils wrapped around your brain suddenly thrust into your mind, burrowing into your subconscious and crumpling your shields like they were made out of tissue paper. Your eyes widened and your mouth opened in a silent scream as the Sith invaded every one of your senses, pillaging every memory, every emotion, every fleeting thought he encountered along the way.

Your eyes stared ahead as he held you in place, pressing his forehead against yours. The fog of his presence settled over your mind, slowly and steadily learning your insides and outs as you stood defenseless to stop it.

Why? That was the one thought that continued to echo through your head even as he ransacked your mind. Why is he doing this? Why is this happening to me? And you gasped in shock when the fog parted just enough to show you the answer.

Just as Valor was reading your memories, so too did he allow you read one of his during this forced meld of your minds. You were almost too dazed, too stunned by the horror of what was transpiring to notice it, but it was as if something from inside of Valor’s force signature had seized you by the wrist and pulled you towards it. Mechanically, you allowed it to drawn you in, closing your eyes to better visualize what he was projecting.

You watched, as if in a stupor, through eyes that were not your own as Valor knelt in front of a figure clad in black. You blinked when he blinked, and when he spoke, it was as if he did so with your own vocal cords.

“I believe I have found an apprentice, my master,” he intoned, bowing his head in a show of respect. Footsteps grew closer, and even though you were only experiencing it through a memory, the force signature of the man in the black cloak struck you to the bone. From somewhere far away, you could feel a tear start to fall down your face before a hand brushed it away. More fell to take its place, though, as you heard the Master Sith speak.

“Good…” You shivered; the sound of his voice made you feel like ants were crawling under your skin. “Are they strong?”

“She will be,” the apprentice replied. “She’s being trained by the Jedi now, but soon, she’ll be sent on a mission with her master that will leave her…vulnerable.”

“A padawan, you say. How old?”

“Only two years younger than I was when you first accepted me under your tutelage, Master.”

“Hm…”

You felt a spike of fear as the creature considered Valor’s words, but you realized with a start that it hadn’t come from you. No, it was part of the apprentice Sith’s memories; Kenobi was nearly as terrified of his own master as you were of him. The realization did nothing to quell your growing anxiety as the rest of the memory played out behind your closed eyelids.

“Acquire the girl and test her first,” the master finally replied. “See if she is strong enough to withstand the training in whatever way you see fit.”

In the vision, the Sith stepped closer to Valor, giving him just enough of a vantage point to see a pale chin and a thin pair of lips. They slowly twitched upwards, forming into an imitation of a smile as he considered his student, and as he spoke, you caught glimpses of his crooked, yellowed teeth.

“If she fails, leave her body at the Jedi temple steps and start looking for another,” he ordered. “It is time you make yourself known to the Jedi as a Sith Lord; you will need an apprentice as we draw ever closer to our goal.”

With that, the vision dispersed, and once again you opened your eyes to find Valor staring down at you. His presence was still exploring, still twisting and turning and writhing through your skull, but now you understood. Your heart sank with the realization that you were the padawan he’d spoken about in his memory, that this must be the test his master had spoken about.

“Oh, no, my darling,” he suddenly chuckled. His hand slipped into your hair, finding your padawan braid and taking hold of it in his fist. “The test hasn’t even started yet. This is just an introduction.”

With that, he took a step backwards, pulling you to him by your braid. Wincing at the yank of your hair, you stumbled forward, head spinning with the effort of piloting your body while Valor still had a chokehold on your consciousness.

“Kneel,” he commanded, arching an eyebrow. Dumbly, you furrowed your eyebrows, trying to search through your memories to remember what that word meant. You swayed in place, eyelids suddenly struggling to stay open, and a voice inside of you whispered that it would be much better to just go to sleep right now. You lazily considered that thought; it would be so nice to just close your eyes, relax your muscles, tune out all of your fears…

You heard the crack of Valor’s palm meeting your cheek before you felt it, but the sting it left behind was fierce as your eyes snapped open once again. Your lips parted in shock as you gaped up at the man standing before you; you’d been shot at, punched at, lunged at, and stabbed at over the course of your career as a Jedi learner, but no one had ever slapped you before. You didn’t even know how you were supposed to feel after being slapped, but you felt the sting of tears behind your eyes, nonetheless.

“I said kneel, apprentice,” Valor repeated. “You’ll find that I will not give you the luxury of an easy way out of this; focus. I won’t have you passing out on me.”

Numbly, you dropped to your knees in front of him, wincing at the bite of the metal floor beneath them. Approval was sent to you in a gentle wave through the force, and its softness surprised you; it had been the first relief you’d felt since waking up in this strange place.

“Don’t be so surprised,” the Sith chuckled, reaching down to stroke your hair. “Obedience should be met with acknowledgement and approval; even big, bad Sith know that.”

He grinned, tilting your chin up so he could see your face clearly. His thumb traced the shape of your lower lip, and a large part of you wanted to pull away from his touch, wanted to push him away and scrub clean every inch of skin that he’d come in contact with. But your fear was too great, especially after receiving that slap from him, and you were as good as paralyzed as he continued speaking.

“You know what your options are, padawan,” he intoned, sneering as if your title were an insult. “Either submit to me, to the Dark Side, or…”

He trailed off, and in that moment your eyes fell forward, immediately focusing on the lightsaber strapped to his belt. It was only a weapon; every force-user built their own lightsaber from scratch, and so you knew that it was only a device made of screws and bolts, metal and crystal. But, in that moment, you knew that this lightsaber was more than all that. The kyber crystal at the heart of Valor’s saber seemed to pulse with its own energy, its own presence, and you instinctively knew that Jedi lives had been ended at its hand.

And chances were that very soon, yours could be added to their number.

“Well. I don’t think I need to tell you what will happen if you fail,” he finished.

He let that sink in for a moment, reading your features to make sure you realized the gravity of your situation. You gulped, feeling a surge of anger well up inside of you despite your years of Jedi training. You couldn’t help but want to scream in his face that you were already well aware that you were fucked; he didn’t need to gloat about it. He smirked, opening his mouth to say something, but the words died on his tongue. He paused, furrowing his eyebrows, and slowly shut his mouth; you felt something in the back of your mind prod at a memory, distant and far-off, and your head lurched when he suddenly focused in on it.

“What do we have here…?”

Realization dawned on you as soon as you caught a glimpse of what he was making you recall, and you shook your head, scrambling to your feet and backing away as you tried to push the memory back into your subconscious. But you might as well have tried to move a brick wall with nothing but your bare hands; batting away your attempts with ease, Kenobi watched the memory unfold, his force presence practically humming with delight.

It happened when you were sixteen – too young to have been exposed to such things. Your master, you, and a young Jedi knight named Tabytha had been assigned to capture the leader of a small group of terrorists on a planet called Mandalore. Mandalore had needed the Jedi’s help many times in the years before, during, and after its civil war; the Jedi had almost grown accustomed to being summoned there to help, and so your master had been confident in the ability of the three of you to take down the small group of insurgents. Tabytha had been on assignments with you and your master before, and you’d grown to be close friends with her, despite your differences in age. She was like a second mentor to you, and she and Mace worked so well with one another that you’d always wondered if there was something more between them than they were letting on.

But despite how successful the three of you had been during past missions, your luck ran out on Mandalore. Your master had greatly underestimated their numbers and their weaponry, and it was his mistake that, in the end, led to Tabytha’s death.

You’d come so close to winning that day; you’d taken care of most of the warriors already, and you were closing in on their leader when the sniper took you off guard. It happened in the blink of an eye; one moment, Tabytha was alive, her force signature shining bright with optimism, with hope, with the thrill of the fight. But in the next, she was gone.

And your master hadn’t even turned around to look; the only sign that he’d felt her death at all was a slight waver in his step. But it hardly even slowed him down as he continued towards the kingpin. It was the cold thing to do, but it was also the Jedi thing to do – setting aside personal feelings and focusing on the needs of the many. You should have been proud of your master for his strict obedience of the code.

But instead, it had enraged you.

“Oh, dear,” Valor remarked, snapping you back to the present. “That poor sniper. You certainly didn’t need to cut off both of his arms, love-“

“Stop,” you whispered, pleading him with your eyes, with your mind. “Please, stop-“

“No,” he interrupted, his voice cold, suddenly devoid of any warmth or humor. “Remember it. Remember what your first brush with the dark side felt like.”

You shook your head, resisting the pull as he tried to draw you back into the memory. You’d pressed yourself against the wall, but an invisible force suddenly latched onto your body; you gasped as your feet left the ground, feeling your stomach lurch as you started floating towards him. You thrashed, straining to fight against the grip he had on you, but it accomplished nothing, save for bringing an amused grin to Valor’s face.

“Charming.”

In an instant, he flooded your mind with what you’d felt all those years ago, except it was now intensified tenfold. The grief of losing Tabytha hit you first, forcing a choked sob to escape your lips as you closed your eyes, only to find the sight of her corpse waiting there for you. You stared into her sightless eyes as tears spilled out of your own, and it was then that the guilt came swooping in.

“It should have been me,” you whispered aloud, opening your eyes to find Valor’s face mere inches away from your own.

“No, love,” he murmured. “You can’t lie to me; I’m in your head. That’s not really why you feel guilty, now is it?”

Your lip trembled, and you shook your head, lowering your gaze to the ground.

“No,” you breathed.

“Then explain your guilt – truthfully, this time.”

You closed your eyes once again, and now, you saw your master where Tabytha’s corpse had just laid. He was just as lifeless as she was, his eyes already glazed over, body already cold as ice, and you let out a sigh - one of relief. Because, yes, he was your master, your teacher, the closest thing to a parent you’d ever had… But he was also an asshole. His expectations had always been unfairly high, and while it had motivated padawans of his in the past to work harder to achieve them, it had only ever succeeded in making you feel like a disappointment.

“It should have been him.”

Approval once again flowed to you through the force, and with it crept in another emotion, one that you’d forced down countless times in your life. One that you should have known would come after guilt, because every time you’d felt it, guilt indubitably would come with it. It was an emotion forbidden to the Jedi, as staunchly opposed as the Sith who now held you, powerless, in his grasp.

Anger.

The strength of it took your breath away as you opened your eyes again, and you saw red as you remembered the rage that had once filled you up to the brim. That word – powerless – came back to you, and you found that it perfectly explained the anger you’d felt after Tabytha’s murder. You’d been powerless to prevent it, powerless to stop it, and powerless to bring her back.

“That’s it,” Kenobi praised, grinning at you wickedly. He dropped his hands to his belt, and your eyes widened as he started to unclasp it. Fear pulsed through you, but your wrath did as well; because even now you were powerless to the whims of this Sith, just as you had been from the moment he’d walked into the room. This cruel display of power was only to toy with you, to make you suffer-

“Guess again, love,” he chided. His fingers paused just above the zipper on his trousers, and he took a step closer, until once again his robes brushed against your skin. “As adorable as your attempts at resisting me are, there is a different purpose behind this. Just give in; remember what the dark side felt like, what it showed you.”

You gritted your teeth, trying to think through the anger; what was he trying to show you? And what did it matter? You wouldn’t be able to survive an apprenticeship under this man if this was what the Dark Side was – either it would kill you, or you would kill yourself from the torture of it.

Warm hands suddenly came to rest against your sides, and you opened your eyes to see Kenobi in front of you, staring into your eyes with such deep intensity that it momentarily broke through your rage. It was as if you were standing in the eye of a storm; the force was roiling around you, bubbling with anticipation for something, though you had no idea what. Valor’s eyes seemed to swirl like pools of molten lava as you struggled to find your bearings in the force – there was something you needed to realize. You just couldn’t put your finger on what.

His hands travelled downward, reaching behind your back to the handcuffs still keeping you bound.

“Think of that powerlessness,” he purred against your ear, fiddling with the device’s latch. “Think of the anger you felt in response to it. Why? Why feel such fury in the face of such weakness?”

You swallowed, closing your eyes and searching for the answer. Valor’s grip on your mind loosened just enough for you to pull away for a moment, and you so did. You managed to pull your consciousness away from his just for a second, and you took a breath, forcing yourself to look at your emotions from a new perspective, one that went against everything the Jedi stood for.

And it was then that you found the answer. You didn’t flinch when your handcuffs fell to the floor, nor did you feel any soreness as your arms slowly fell to your sides - you were too busy focusing on the Sith Lord’s face as you tried to put your realization into words.

“Because it’s power,” you heard yourself saying. “Because anger is power – it has been all along.”

A proud grin spread over his face, and you made no move to fight him as he wrapped his arms around your waist. The callouses on his hands scratched lightly at your back as he held you close to him, and your palms came up to rest on his chest as he leaned over you.

“Well done, my young apprentice.”

His lips fell onto yours the second after he whispered those words, and immediately they were insistent, insatiable. His tongue glided past your lips as they parted in a gasp, and his arms tightened around you possessively as, once again, he wrapped his presence around yours in the force. You felt yourself get swept up in a torrent of his thoughts. You saw the memory of when he’d first laid eyes on you when you’d crossed paths in a public transport terminal. You hadn’t even noticed him, focused instead on whatever your master was telling you, and yet he’d immediately recognized how bright you shone in the force.

I knew I wanted you as soon as I felt it, you heard his voice echo in your mind. I saw your anger, felt it simmering just beneath your surface, and I knew then that you could be beautiful, darling.

You didn’t know what you should be focusing on – what Kenobi was doing to your mind, or your body. You were broken out of his thoughts by the feeling of him wrapping your legs around his waist just before he pulled you into another memory, this time from the day after discovering you. He’d had a dream of you that morning before he woke up – a vision, one of you fighting at his side, wielding a red lightsaber to match his own, your eyes wide and wild with the bloodlust of a Sith.

As the Valor in his memory woke up from the dream, you felt his rush of arousal as he realized that he was hard. Heat rose in your cheeks as you watched him throw his bedsheets back, and your lips parted in a jagged moan as you felt him take his erection in hand. You had done that to him, you realized, and the thought only made the foreign feelings inside of you grow in strength.

You’d felt aroused before, sure, but nothing had ever been like this. You shook your head, dispelling the vision of his fist pumping his hard cock up and down, only to find Valor watching you with a wide grin. You jolted when you realized that he had you pinned against the wall, your hands resting on his shoulders for support as he stood between your legs.

“I’ve wanted you since the moment I saw you, young one,” he growled, pressing the hard length of his cock against your bare pussy. Your eyes widened at the feeling that it provoked inside of you; something in your core tightened as you felt him press against your clit, and embarrassment seeped through you when you looked down to see your own wetness glimmering against his pants.

“No need to be embarrassed, you sweet, innocent thing,” he chuckled, and the hairs at the base of your neck bristled. “I’ll be your first, will I not? Something about a rule against forming attachments while serving under the Jedi Order?”

You stiffened at his mention of the Code, and for a brief moment, the thought of how wrong this was flashed through you. The anger still inside of you, the way your body was responding to Valor’s, the temptation to just give in to him, if only to spare yourself from feeling so conflicted.

“The Code is for our protection-“ You started to say, but Kenobi cut you off with a loud, sharp bark of laughter.

“Please tell me you’re not going to recite Jedi dogma to me right now,” he groaned. Once more, he pressed his cock against you, rolling his hips forward and grinning as it elicited another stilted gasp from you. “It’ll kill my mood.”

He continued grinding his hips, and your entire body jumped when you feel a new touch, a foreign one, start to crawl down the valley between your breasts, making its way to your sopping core. You knew it was the force; you’d heard of it being used for such things. But even now you could hear Master Windu’s voice telling you that it would be blasphemous to even think about using a power as great as the force for such base-

Your thoughts dissolved into white noise as the touch suddenly dropped down, going straight for your clit.

“Stop thinking about the Jedi, love. You said it yourself,” he cajoled, starting to circle your clit slowly as he whispered against your ear, “Anger is power; if the Jedi got that wrong, what other lies have they told you about the force?”

Anger is power.

You paused, that thought echoing in your head even as Kenobi used the force to push his trousers down to his knees. His hard cock sprang free, already leaking a bead of precum, but you felt nearly numb as you watched him stroke it.

Anger is power.

It had to be the truth, right? Why else would you feel it so consistently when you felt at your weakest? Why did the Jedi fear it so, if it were anything else other than the power they so desperately warned their followers against craving? Why else was it able to consume everything – fear, sorrow, grief – in its wake? You searched for it now, calling your anger to you as Valor lined himself up with your entrance, and, easily, it came surging back into your veins.

And, god, it felt good.

It choked out your fear as you thought back on the principles you’d been raised to have faith in. When had the Jedi made you feel anything better than this? You’d been controlled by them your entire life; every memory of your childhood, adolescence, and adulthood was built on a pillar of the Jedi, and yet you had only ever been made to feel like you weren’t good enough. You had been isolated, unbalanced, under the tutelage of the Council and under the heel of your master.

But not anymore. Because whether or not you decided to forgive the Jedi for their mistreatment of you, you could never go back. Not when Darth Valor was offering you a choice between either becoming his apprentice or being killed. Not after letting yourself feel this anger and realizing how intoxicating it was.

Not after you felt his cock split you open and stretch your pussy in a way that was white-hot with searing pain while also managing to fill a void inside of you that you hadn’t even realized had been there all along. Your lips parted around a stilted, breathless moan as you watched Valor’s eyes flutter shut. A long, drawn out groan escaped his lips, and you knew that, during your entire life as a pawn of the Jedi, you had never felt this powerful.

The two of you cried out in tandem as Kenobi drew his hips back only to thrust back inside of you, and you glanced down to see streaks of blood staining his cock. You didn’t feel any worry or hesitancy, though; instead, heat sparked somewhere in your mind, and though you were unsure if it had come from you or from him, a wave of need suddenly washed over you. Pure, carnal need to own, consume, and corrupt.

Your hands fisted into Valor’s hair, pulling him forward until his mouth collided with yours. It was sloppy, desperate – his teeth clanked against yours as your tongues tangled together, but neither of you seemed to care. His hands fell to your ass, squeezing it roughly as he started to set a brutal pace. Tears gathered in your eyes at the pain of his cock pounding into you, but when he once again used the force to circle and stimulate your clit, you felt your eyes roll back as you felt a sharp burst of pleasure trail up your spine.

Give into me, a voice whispered in your head. Use your anger; surrender to the Dark Side…

You squeezed your eyes shut, throwing your head back as the head of his cock brushed against something inside of you that your own fingers had never managed to find before. Panting, you arched your back, desperate to feel his cock hit that spot again. Your nails dug into his shoulders, tearing at the fabric of his robes, futilely trying to pull him closer to you.

“Commit yourself to me.” His lips brushed against your neck as he spoke, voice shaking with each thrust. “Say you’ll be mine, dear one…”

You felt the darkness of his presence descend upon you again, just as it had before, but this time you didn’t even try to raise your shields up. His force signature held only the promise of release, of guidance – you were suddenly greeted with the image of the two of you in a hotel room as you straddled him, bouncing on his cock until he was begging you to let him cum. Abruptly, the vision shifted, and then you saw yourself seated on a throne with his head between your legs, your hips rising up to meet his tongue as he doted on the most sensitive part of your body.

Next, he showed you the two of you sparing, of him painstakingly showing you how to fight like a Sith, think like a Sith – grow powerful, like a Sith. The final vision that flashed from his mind to yours was of the two of you together, standing over the corpse of his former master, each with an ignited lightsaber in your hand. Before you, in an expansive, grand throne room, thousands of people fell to their knees, bowing their heads in subjugation as their two new rulers stood before them – an entire empire, being built even now by the man Kenobi would one day fighting for the power to rule it all.

With you as his apprentice, his lover – his empress – at his side.

As soon as the image faded from your imagination, your hands fell to his belt, smoothly grabbing his lightsaber and igniting it. Immediately, his body went still, and for a moment, the two of you stayed exactly like that, neither of you so much as twitching a muscle as his weapon emitted its low, deadly hum. And then, slowly, he rose his head up and met your eyes, his pupils blown so wide that there was only a thin ring of gold around them now.

Both of you knew that you could kill him with a flick of your wrist; no matter what he did, there was no way he’d be able to move fast enough to stop you. He swallowed, staring at you, trying to gauge what your next move was going to be; and, truth be told, for a moment you pondered the same thing. What were you going to do?

Taking a deep breath, you maneuvered the ignited blade between you, careful not to singe either of you as you held the red blade above your head. You were so focused on keeping your hold on his weapon steady that you could do nothing to prevent the violent shaking in your other hand as it reached for your padawan braid. Immediate understanding washed over Kenobi’s face, and he reached for his saber, knowing what you wanted.

“No.”

He paused, furrowing his eyebrows in confusion, and you straightened your spine as you held your braid taut.

“You’ll be my master,” you breathed, “but I freed myself.”

With that, you closed your eyes and brought the saber down onto the lock of hair, singeing it with a quick downward stroke before deactivating its crimson glow. The smell of burnt hair was faint in the air, and your eyes fell onto the braid now dangling from your fingers. Valor’s lightsaber clattered to the ground, forgotten as you felt the last connection you had to the Jedi die.

When your eyes slowly trailed up to meet his, you gulped at the emotion you found brimming in his eyes. Within the force, you felt something warm flow from your new master into you, and you gasped when you realized what it was – joy. Pure, unbridled joy, so unlike the impassivity Mace Windu had once displayed when taking you as his padawan. No, this was so unlike anything any of the Jedi had shown towards you, and the euphoria of it made you roll your hips forward, desperate for the feeling to last.

As if breaking out of a trance, your master blinked once, then twice, before surging forward, claiming your lips in a bruising kiss as he once more started rolling his hips.

Incredible, his mind whispered to you. Knew you were more than those fools gave you credit for, knew you would be extraordinary…

“Obi-Wan,” you moaned, breaking the kiss and letting your head fall back against the wall behind you. You’d used his birthname without thinking, but you gasped when you felt a deep, primal surge from within him. A ragged growl poured out of his lips, and his hips quickened, drawing a high-pitched wail from your throat.

One of his hands creeped between your bodies, and as soon as he started rubbing your clit in time with his thrusts, you knew that you wouldn’t last much longer. Your toes curled as you felt something inside of you start to tighten – it spread up your legs, arching your spine and making stars explode behind your eyes as you approached the edge.

“Obi-Wan,” you breathed, clawing at his shoulders. You were right there, right there, so fucking close but not quite close enough. “I-I need-“

One last time, he pressed your minds together, pushing into your force presence as far as he could and opening himself up to you. A torrent of sensations flooded your system – you felt a tight, wet heat wrapped around you, tighter than anyone you’d ever fucked before. You felt someone’s nails digging into your skin, scratching at you and heightening your pleasure with sparks and jolts of pain. You felt the exhilaration of corrupting someone completely, stealing every shred of innocence from their mind, body, and soul, all at the same time.

And finally, finally, a bright, blistering light cut through the darkness as you reached the hardest orgasm you’d ever felt. You couldn’t even make a sound as it rippled through you, making your your body tense up and tremble as Valor fucked you through it. Your pussy clenched down onto his cock, walls fluttering as you rode out your high, and with a resounding cry of your name, he found his own release, painting it on your inner walls.

His hips moved against yours lazily as he rode out the aftershocks of his orgasm, keeping your body pressed flush against his. His lips moved slowly against yours, sloppy and languid as his tongue explored your mouth; as it was, you didn’t think you’d have the strength to stand if he let you go, and you found yourself returning his touch, longing to be close to him as the reality of what just happened set in.

When his lips eventually parted from yours, both of you took a deep breath, looking at each other with half-lidded eyes. Your new master’s face was impassive, and his presence was calm in the force, something you never would have expected from a Sith.

“You’re a Sith too now, you know,” he pointed out, and you felt your cheeks start to heat up – you’d forgotten that he could hear your thoughts. “We’re not so scary now that you’re one of us, now are we?”

He gave you an amused quirk of the eyebrow, and you shrugged, not trusting yourself to speak just yet. With one last peck to your lips, he let go of you, and though you wobbled on your feet for a moment, you managed to stay on them as he fixed his clothes.

Looking down at your hands, you realized that you were still holding your padawan braid in a tight fist; letting your fingers fall open, you held up your palm, looking at the thin sliver of hair you held in your hand. You didn’t need to check to know that the training bond you’d had with Master Windu had been broken; you would have been able to feel him the moment you woke up if it hadn’t been. How had you not noticed until now?

“Because there’s already a new bond in its place.”

You paused, furrowing your brows as you looked up at your master. Searching inside of yourself, you found that he was right; where there had once been a telepathic chord that connect you to Windu, there was now a new one, already doubly as strong as your connection to your Jedi master.

“How…?”

Confusion filled you; you hadn’t felt such a bond form, and a new force bond wasn’t something you just missed, no matter how busy you were having sex with a Sith Lord. But how, then, was it there now? Unless…

“The bond was already there when I woke up,” you realized. Glancing up, you could tell by the expression on Valor’s face that it was true. “But… But then, why-“

“I knew you would accept me,” he explained, cupping your cheek. “I formed the bond while you slept. Do you really think I would reveal the plans I have in store for my master with just anyone?”

He smiled, his eyes crinkling up at their corners as he gazed down at you fondly.

“I watched you until I knew for sure that you were the one,” he went on, running the tip of his thumb along your cheekbone. “The one who I wanted to share my knowledge, my power, and my life with. It took me about ten years to manage it, but eventually… I found you.”

You were past the point of feeling violated that he’d left such a permanent mark on you in your sleep, and you were past any concern at the possessive gleam in his eyes as he regarded you. Instead, you felt warm; you felt seen for the first time in your life. Because, to the Jedi, you’d been just one more padawan, one more soldier – you hadn’t even been special to your own master.

But this man, this Sith, had waited a decade just for you. All that mattered now was that you were here, and despite your earlier fear, you didn’t regret your decision. You leaned into your master’s touch as he pulled you to him, and you let the final shred of who you used to be fall away as his voice echoed both in your ears and in your mind.

“From now on, my dear apprentice, you will be known as Darth Nocuous, and soon, not only will the Jedi know better than to underestimate you – the entire galaxy will, starting with me.”

#star wars #star wars fanfiction #star wars imagine #obi wan kenobi #obi wan kenobi x reader #obi-wan kenobi #obi wan kenobi imagine #sith!obi wan #sith!obi wan kenobi #sith!obi wan kenobi x reader #darth valor

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lokiwritess · 4 years

Text

Gone - Obi-Wan Kenobi

Sooo... this is dramatic (except the end?) Lemme know what you think? It’s def not my fav thing

"...Survived, he has not." Yodas last words knocked the wind out of your lungs. Obi-Wan Kenobi, General and Jedi Master had not survived his injuries. He was gone. You would never see his face again, nor would you ever hear his voice or feel his presence near you in the force.

The force, which buzzed with negative emotions from the people around the room. They rushed into your mind like waves, making it harder to breathe than it already was. Panic spread in your body, making you think you would suffocate on these emotions.

It became all you could focus on, with Yoda's words echoing around in your head. The room, the people around you - it all seemed to slip away until it was nothing but a muffled noise somewhere else.

"Y/n?" Ahsoka's gentle voice startled you. It forced you out of your trance, back into reality. She watched as you turned your head to her, eyes empty, void of all emotion other than shock.

It should have been you. It should have been you that died. He was a general, a master. You were only another Jedi Knight, assigned to help him out. Now, who would be the one to lead the 212th? Who was going to tell them - tell Commander Cody - that their leader was gone? Or did they already know?

Ahsoka flinched slightly at the emotions radiating from you. She was determined to help, to do something. She couldn't help her own master - force, Anakin didn't talk to anyone and barely looked at her - so she at least wanted to try with you. But somehow she knew that her words would make no difference. They wouldn't ease your pain and they wouldn't bring Obi-Wan back home. Yet words were all she had to offer at the moment.

"I'm so sorry." Thankfully, your half shut-down mind reacted for you, before you even grasped the words that had come out of the Togrutan's mouth. As the wall of numbness that you had built around you crumbled, your feet instinctively whirled you around and moved you out of the room. That way at least, no one saw the way your heart broke. No one saw the pain in your eyes.

Nothing seemed to matter anymore. The Jedi Code called upon Jedi to accept death as inevitable, a normal part of life. But how could you ever accept that Obi-Wan was gone?

_________________________________

The Commander of the 212th had tried his best to reach you, somehow. But how do you help someone that doesn't want to be helped? Suddenly, you were in charge of the 212th, thrust into a new situation when you could barely stand to be around people. Suddenly you were expected to keep fighting in the war when your biggest fight yet was to get out of bed in the mornings. Even Cody - bred on Kamino to value duty and rules above anything else - always knew the way that you and Obi-Wan looked at each other was special. He knew the way you felt about each other, even if no one mentioned it.

You adhered to the rules; But the looks exchanged between you and the small gestures of love you'd shared, like brief brushes of your hands in passing or checking on each other after complicated missions: they spoke of mutual affection.

"I don't know what else we can do.", Ahsoka admitted quietly.

You could feel their eyes on you as you sat in the empty corridor. You had your arms wrapped around your knees, trying to shut out the feeling of worry each of them held. Cody looked at Anakin, trying to look for guidance where there was only a mask, hiding the Jedi's true feelings.

"This behavior is extremely dangerous, Sir."

"I'll take care of it.", Anakin spoke up.

He didn't say anything else, but at least he spoke at all, Ahsoka noted. Anakin had been dealing with his grief over his former Master in a similar way than you had - which was not at all and preferably alone. To an extent, hearing his voice was almost a shock, especially to hear it laced with such worry and an underlying softness.

Anakin didn't care if the other two were watching. He sat down against the wall, right next to you, taking your focus off of Ahsoka and Cody. Instead, your focus was drawn to his presence. You were almost taken aback when you felt how exhausted he really was. But the utter loneliness he felt resonated with your deepest and darkest feelings, making you sigh involuntarily.

Quiet ruled the space between you for a moment, as Anakin struggled with the right words to use. But he knew the truth. "I know that no matter what I'm going to say, it won't make it okay.", he started carefully, one hand coming up to rest on the side of your arm. "But you're not alone. I'm right here. That's all that matters right now."

Anakin had always been your friend since you met him when he was a little boy. He was like family to you. But more important than anything else: He was the only one in a position to truly understand your feelings. He was after all Obi-Wan's former padawan. Ahsoka and Cody could only watch as you broke into tears, finally crumbling, finally letting yourself feel again. Sobs racked through your body, as Anakin pulled you against his chest and firmly wrapped his arms around you. He put his chin on the top of your head with a sigh.

"I understand. I miss him too."

At Anakin's words, your sobs grew harder, and he reacted by pulling you even closer and saying nothing more. It would take time for you both to heal from losing someone so close to you. And even though you both instinctively shut down and shut everyone else out, you somehow knew deep down that Obi-Wan would want neither of you to go through this alone.

_________________________________

Too much was happening around you and in your head all at once. Too many emotions and thoughts pressed on your mind. There, right in front of you, stood the man you loved. Very much alive, healthy even. And the look in his eyes was one of utter relief. He looked so relieved and happy, to see you and to be there with you. A stark contrast to the dark and shocked look that you could see on Anakin's face.

A lie. A secret mission. A manipulation.

A smile adorned Obi-Wan's face, one that under normal circumstances would have made your knees weak and sped up your heartbeat. You weren't functioning. Cody's questions had faded out and everyone, even Anakin's angry eyes were focused on you, to see how you would react.

In hindsight, you felt a little bad. But at that moment, the utter betrayal you felt and the confusion... they made your adrenaline spike. The loud sound that your flat hand made when it connected to Obi-Wans Cheek echoed in the room. His head turned by the force of your slap, and as your hand fell, his own came up to rub his hurting cheek. Tears stung in your eyes as you let out a frustrated and angry scoff.

Without knowing what to do, in complete adrenaline-mode, you turned around and took angry and fast strides out of the room.

"I suppose I deserved that.", Obi-Wan pressed out through the stinging pain. But no one laughed. He had a lot to fix.

#clone wars imagine #star wars imagine #star wars x reader #clone wars x reader #obi wan kenobi x reader #obi-wan kenobi imagine #louistrying #obi-wan kenobi

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giggles-and-freckles · 4 years

Text

in the sandstorm

read on ao3

None of it would have happened if he hadn’t decided to try and be a kriffing local, rescuing stray parts to trade with the Jawas , of all beings.

He’d stayed afloat for so many years on the meagre funds that were annually routed via Bail, but at a certain point, business with the Jawas became the least conspicuous way to continue to survive. They drove a hard bargain, but Ben had a few tricks up his tattered sleeves, so he normally managed to walk away with the better end of the deal.

They weren’t picky about what he gave them. As long as the something was shiny or made some sort of noise, they were content and would babble their way into acquiring it. Ben wasn’t picky about his compensation, either. Food was just as good as credits on Tatooine, if not better.

When the winds started to pick up, he knew the tin scraps he had loaded in from the valley would be goners unless he got them inside. This was no easy task in the first hour of a Tatooine sandstorm, however.

The sandstorms could last days and Ben didn’t feel like leaving his source of income to the throes of the Tatooine climate for that long. So he ventured out, pulling his hood down as far as possible and donning the goggles that always reminded him of Ahsoka.

He’d almost grown acclimated to the overwhelming sting that accompanied that memory.

What he didn’t expect to find was a small boy a few hundred metres away, desperately trying to restart his speeder.

Ben squinted, unable to make out any specifics beyond the size of the human and shoddiness of the speeder. He hesitated for a moment, thinking of his tin scraps and how hard he had worked to pull them from the valley.

In the end, his begrudgingly innate desire to help won out.

“Hello!” he called out, bellowing over the screech of the accelerating winds.

The boy continued fiddling with the handles of the speeder.

“You there! Excuse me!” shouted Ben, struggling to even walk amidst the assault of wind and sand.

This time, the boy looked up and Ben stopped short.

Fuck.

Of course it was him. Ben should have known that the twisting of his gut had little to do with the impending storm and everything to do with the Force.

“Are you talking to me?” managed Luke, cupping his hands around his mouth.

Ben considered turning around and heading back to his hut right then, forgetting the tin and the boy. But blast that desire to help.

“Yes! Are you having trouble with your bike?” He was close to the boy now. Close enough where Luke could understand him without having to scream and close enough for Ben to see all the similarities he had absolutely no business in noticing.

“Yes, sir,” nodded Luke with a frown. “It stalled out and I can’t see enough to reattach the converter.”

“The storm is only going to get worse,” Ben pointed out, looking at the hovering bike.

“That’s why I’m in a hurry to get it fixed. I’m...a bit far from home.”

Far, indeed. The Lars lived on the other side of the canyon, closer to the spaceport. It was strange that Luke was out this far at all.

“You’re not going to make it home in this storm.”

Luke looked like he already knew this to be true, but wasn’t willing to accept it. “My aunt and uncle will kill me if I miss dinner again.” he whined.

“They cannot kill you if you are already dead,” quipped Ben.

The boy stared blankly for a moment before his lips quirked up into a half-smile. “They’re pretty persistent.”

Ben paused again, wondering what the hell he was doing. How many times had Owen Lars already been out to his hut asking, telling, and then demanding Ben stay away from Luke? And how many times had Ben chastised himself for being unable to quell his own curiosity, his own seeming desire for more hurt?

“Perhaps a sandstorm is not the ideal place to repair a speeder,” he began slowly. “You are welcome to bring it into my workshop. I have a few spare parts that you may find useful.”

Luke’s eyes widened. “Oh, no, that’s all right. Thank you, sir, but I--I really have to get going. Like I said, my aunt and uncle will--”

“Be more forgiving of your tardiness than your death.”

“Well,” Luke grimaced, “that’s a good point.” He stared at the ground for a moment, chewing at his lip, before he raised his gaze to meet Ben’s. “Are you sure you don’t mind?”

“Of course not. We should hurry. The wind is about to shift.”

He was right. Between the two of them, they barely managed to get the stalled bike into Ben’s before the winds completely changed directions, as it always did before the worst of it. This was a good sign, because it meant it would be a short storm. A couple hours, perhaps.

But it also meant that Luke wasn’t going anywhere anytime soon.

“I was perhaps a bit generous with the label of workshop before.” Ben shrugged as he surveyed the small cave.

“It’s great. Thanks, Mr.--” Luke blinked as if he only just realised he didn’t know the name of his saviour.

“Ben. Ben Kenobi.”

“Ben,” nodded Luke. “Thanks for your help, Ben.”

And then, because it all suddenly became a bit much for the old man, he dismissed himself, letting Luke know he would be up in the main room if he needed anything.

Anakin’s son.

He’d spent the past several years watching over the boy from afar, occasionally getting a bit too close for Owen and Beru’s comfort. But this was the first time since he had held the wailing infant in his arms on the long ride to Tatooine that he had spoken directly to the boy.

Life on Tatooine was lonely, but Ben felt that was a small price to pay for the pain he had afflicted on the galaxy. On this child.

Anakin’s son.

“Mr. Ben?” Luke’s head popped up from the small door that led to the workshop.

“Just Ben,” his lips twitched. “What is it?”

“I think I’ve got her figured out. Thank you.”

Ben’s eyebrows rose in surprise. “That was fast.”

“My uncle says I’ve already been pretty good with mechanics,” Luke shrugged.

Ben was thankful for the table that was in between them because it gave Luke a better chance at missing the way Ben’s knees momentarily buckled beneath him.

Of course he would be good with mechanics.

“That’s a useful trait,” Ben was impressed with his own ability to sound so detached.

“I’d rather be a pilot.”

He was transported, immediately, to his desperate attempts to teach Anakin the basics of Coruscanti traffic laws. It was all to no avail, of course, and he had the sneaking suspicion that Anakin had enjoyed seeing his Master green in the face.

“What were you doing anyway?” probed Ben. “There’s not much out here aside from Jawas and some sand people and I certainly hope you weren’t getting mixed up with them.”

“No,” Luke shook his head frantically. “There were some tin scraps in the valley a few days ago that I thought I could attach to my uncle’s old regulator to freshen it up. I came to try and get them, but they were gone anyway.”

Ben swallowed. “I see.”

“The truth is,” Luke leaned on his arms, offering a look of guilt, “my aunt told me I can’t go past the canyon until I’m ten…”

“And how old are you now?”

“Nine,” he said proudly.

This time, Ben did little to hide his physical reaction as he dropped into the solo chair that occupied his living space.

“You’re...nine?” he sputtered.

“Aunt Beru says it’s an important age, but I feel like it’s just getting in the way of me being a real adult,” Luke scrunched his nose sourly.

Had it really been nine years?

Ben had stopped counting the rotations after the first few revolutions. Besides, Tatooine days were longer than Coruscanti ones and he had lost track of it all so long ago.

But nine years.

That would make Luke the exact same age Anakin had been when Ben...no, Obi-Wan ...had taken him on as his Padawan.

For the first time in a while, Ben let himself wallow in the pool of nostalgia he was so insistent on staying away from. It was impossible not to look at the boy in front of him and see the icy blue eyes that had provided Obi-Wan an open door into the emotions, struggles, and joys of Anakin Skywalker on so many occasions.

Luke’s shaggy blonde hair was even reminiscent of Anakin’s after he cut it himself in a desperate attempt to blend in with the other Padawans. It had looked atrocious, of course, and Obi-Wan had been forced to shave it to near baldness in an attempt at recovery. Those were a rough few weeks for Anakin…

“Why do you live so far away from everything?” asked Luke. “Don’t you get bored out here?”

Ben withheld his dark chuckle. Bored . As if he had the time to be bored amidst all of the remembering .

“I’m a simple man,” Ben shrugged.

“Have you lived here forever?”

Ben paused again, wondering how to go about this particular answer. “No, I moved here several years ago.”

Luke’s eyes widened again. “You moved from another planet to Tatooine? You’re crazy!”

“It was a necessary change,” Ben pulled a smile. It felt unfamiliar and his dry lips cracked in response.

“Well, where’d you come from?”

“Oh, here and there.”

“How many systems have you been to?” Luke looked at Ben with fascination.

“A few hundred, I imagine.”

“A few hundred? Did you just say a few hundred?” Luke scrambled out of the small door in the floor, taking a seat on the floor in front of Ben.

“I used to be a traveller.”

“Wow,” sighed Luke in wonder. “I can’t believe you chose to retire here .”

“Retire?” asked Ben indignantly. “Who said anything about retiring? How old do I look?”

Luke shook his head frantically. “No, Mr. Ben! I just meant that I--”

“It’s all right, young one,” Ben smiled. “I was only joking.”

“Oh. Right. Ha ha!” the young boy rather obviously forced a laugh. Like Anakin had done so many times when he’d first arrived at the Temple, not fully grasping Obi-Wan’s sarcasm for months .

“What’s your favourite planet?”

The question took Ben by surprise. It wasn’t as if he didn’t have preferences. He’d certainly choose Kashyyyk over Jakku. But it was difficult to think of any planet without thinking of the stories that came along with it.

“I always had a particular soft spot for Ryloth,” Ben finally landed on. “It’s been mostly decimated by the Empire now, but we had some good memories during the years of the Republic.”

“Who?”

“Hm?”

“You said we. Who is we?” Luke tilted his head and then practically bounced up off the floor. “Do you have a droid?!”

“I don’t have a droid,” Ben shook his head with a chuckle. “I was referring to someone I used to know. A friend.”

The word fell flat and Ben knew he was drastically undershooting, but he couldn’t bring himself to say what he had finally admitted to Anakin on that night of hell so long ago.

A brother.

“Oh. Well, what’d you do?”

“We helped people,” Ben shrugged. “Twi’leks, in that particular case.”

“So before you moved here, you just...travelled from planet to planet and helped people? ”

It was such a simple way to chronicle the Jedi, but Ben found that he quite liked the description.

“Essentially.”

“Wizard,” sighed Luke.

Ben tensed up again, surprising himself at how a simple word could affect him so viscerally. It had been years since he’d heard that particular bit of slang, long before the fall of the Republic.

Anakin had picked it up from friends on Tatooine and taken it with him to the Temple, practically infecting the entire initiate class with the jargon. Obi-Wan had received more exasperated frowns from other Masters during those few months than any other time in Anakin’s apprenticeship. Until Master Yoda had held a seminar for the Padawans on understanding the meaning of a word before using it, one could hardly turn a corner at the Temple without hearing a high-pitched “Wizard!!!!,” followed by the heavy footfall of a running youngling.

“The storm should let up within the hour. I was about to make some broth...would you like some while you wait?” Ben stood from his seat.

“Sure,” Luke nodded enthusiastically. “Thanks!”

Ben made himself busy in the corner that he had attempted to make a kitchen. Running water was a luxury Tatooine did not have, but he’d managed to configure a sort of well system in his hut during his first year on the planet.

“Mr. Ben?”

“Ben,” he corrected. “Yes, my young friend?”

“Do you think you could tell me stories about your travelling and helping people? Stories about you and your friend?”

Ben paused, his hand hovering over the pot. He closed his eyes, drawing a deep breath.

It hurt. It hurt so much every damn day to remember.

But this was Anakin’s son.

A boy who would never know the wonderful, impulsive man who had been his father.

He turned back toward Luke, his first genuine smile in nine years playing at his lips. “I’d be happy to.”

#my fic #obi-wan kenobi #luke skywalker #sw

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goldenclasp · 5 years

Text

I’d say yes but you wouldn’t want me anyway

an Obidala fanfic

August Writing Challenge

Day 2: Rare Pair

Rating: General

Word Count: 1,844

Summary: Padme struggles with her feelings about a passionate kiss that left her breathless. The problem? The man she actually wants won’t even look at her.

Or in shipper terms- a look at the Obidala leg stroke.

ao3, ff.net

Did I ever think I would be here, fighting for my life in the center of a wide sandy arena? Crouching high on a stone pillar? Surrounded by jeering aliens?

Yes, and no.

This isn’t the sort of thing you expect to experience in my line of work. Ambassadors are known for talking, communicating. It’s cowards like Dooku that choose to throw their guests into pits with monsters. And yet, this isn’t the first time I’ve had to take things into my own hands to succeed in a mission.

Blood drips down my raw back, stinging, and I wince. Oh yes, there’s that too. I squint down into the crowd. Hundreds maybe thousands of winged bug like creatures shriek and buzz in the stands. My ears are sore from the screaming. And the sun glares down like a furnace, harsh and hot.

“Padme!”

I glance down to the foot of the pillar; Anakin’s gotten control of that reddish bull creature. It bucks it’s body and swings its large neck to the side but Anakin holds on, cupping a hand over his mouth to yell.

“Jump!”

Surely not? But he cups his hand and yells again. Exhilaration thrums through my chest, much stronger in my heart than the fear. Of the height. Of the arena. Of death.

So I jump.

Pain shoots up through my body as my knees jolt into the back of the bull. My hands scrabble around Anakin’s neck to keep from falling. But I lean into his strong back, pressing a quick kiss to his ear. I’d been aiming for his cheek. The peck earns me a small grin. I’m sure he’d return the gesture if we had time. Of course, but we have no time. He jerks the rope in his hands and we race across the arena floor. Bouncing and clomping along with the bull’s gait.

Suddenly a hand tugs on my knee and Obi-Wan is clambering up the side of the bull. Bracing myself against Anakin I reach down to pull Obi-Wan up. His hand is wide and smooth and covers mine. He’s just as safe as we are now. I move to reassure myself he’s really there behind us but a bump causes my hand to miss him. I brush his knee?

Thigh?

Leg.

Doesn’t matter.

At the same time his hand glides across my shoulder to steady himself. But his touch lingers a second too long. I pause. My breath is short and each swallow hurts. The sun blazes, heat rising off the arena floor but Obi-Wan’s body heat is far more noticeable. It’s such an innocent thing, something he can’t control. Yet it distracts from the chaotic roar of voices. Have his hands always been this soft?

I grip the edge of Anakin’s tunic, breathing deeply.

Anakin.

Anakin Skywalker.

I press my cheek against his back, forcing myself to remember why I’m clinging to him. I can still remember the memory of Anakin’s chapped but gentle lips kissing me. If I focus I can still feel it too. Like it’s happening right now. So tenderly, yet with a passion I’d never felt before. I’m left breathless, my mind blank in the memory of his kiss. My eyelids flutter closed and suddenly I am one with that moment.

Our shoulders brush, hands unable to reach for each other. Straining to be closer to him, my arms register an ache, I’m pulling to be free of the chains. And yet something in my chest begins to hurt. My heart aches worse than my arms. Because I know this will be our last.

Only, if I take a second to examine the thumping in my chest…

It’s strange. This pain in my heart feels too familiar to be fear, too old to be regret for a last kiss. This ache has been with me longer than I’d like to admit. It doesn’t belong to Ani at all. It belongs to a completely different man. So I pause, letting my eyes open a fraction.

Leaning further into me, his mouth still moves. He must sense too that this could be his last chance. I want to lean away but I can’t bring myself to.

Why am I really kissing Ani? It’s not for any pure reason. It’s not for any kind reason either. This young man promises to leave everything for me. How can I ask for more? The thing I have always wanted he is giving me for nothing. Not asking for anything in return, just to love him.

Suddenly this perfect kiss feels wrong. As though-

The cart we stand in jolts forward, the heavy doors in front of us begin to creak as they’re pushed open. Blinding light hits us and I squint, cringing away from the brightness.

And then the present crashes back into me! Noise and pain and the smell of sweat and blood- blazing sun brighter than before. Gritty sand scratches in my throat as I swallow and hot razor blades throb across my skin. And-

Anakin.

The weight of him is comforting against the screaming, cheering. He is here in front of me, acting as a shield from the hostile noise around us. He protects me with his body. And the bull is sturdy under my weight, real.

But I’m tense just like Anakin is tense. Every muscle in his back is taught, shoulders straining forward, body heaving with breath. And sweat, dripping down his neck. The perspiration shines on the dark leather of his gear. I gasp for a full breath to fill my lungs all the way.

Anakin has promised to break his vows for me .

Here I sit, making a checklist of his movements, the strength of his back. Still I can’t keep my thoughts on him. Instead of relishing his proximity I am desperately aware of Obi-Wan’s body.

Both men are next to me: one’s kiss lingers on and the other’s warmth heats me past comfort. One man has promised me everything. The other has promised me nothing.

Obi-Wan has never kissed me. He has never held me. He has never spoken a single flowery word that could set my hopes up.

He has never given me a reason to think of him.

And that is the true source of my heart ache. Only one of them is a noble man. And he is the one that will never look at me.That brief moment of contact has set my head spinning when Anakin has kissed me as though I am the only woman in the world. I am agonizing about one second of touch.

Because it is all I’ll ever get.

With a jolt my thoughts are cut short. Anakin yanks the make-shift reigns hard, causing the three of us to slide backward. Obi-Wan’s cuffed hands grope at the shred of fabric on my back and I cry out. Jerking away from the metal cuffs and his biting finger nails, I cling to Ani to keep from falling.

Obi-Wan isn’t so lucky.

By some miracle he manages to roll as he falls off the bull’s back, but lands on the sandy ground head first.

“Anakin! Stop,” I don’t give him time to respond as I scrabble down to a winded Obi-Wan. It doesn’t even occur to me that we might have stopped so suddenly for a reason. All I can think of is Obi-Wan.

I wrap an arm around the older Jedi, tugging him to his feet. He accepts my help, smiling a bit and waving his hand to explain his fall away. I don’t return it. Now’s not a good time for jokes.

And only then do I see the new enemies. Destroyer droids. They roll and click and jump into a circle around the three of us. Brown bots with double guns each, clacking and shifting like armored beetles. Dooku is yelling something up in the stands, but he’s too far away for it to matter.

Anakin is frozen, hands still raised holding the chain. He doesn’t move and I follow his lead. But my arm secretly tightens around Obi-Wan’s middle, if this is the only chance I get…

Well, it doesn’t seem I’ll be getting many more chances.

Anakin turns quickly to check on us, maybe to try to make out what Dooku and his men are making such a commotion about. I squint at him, still wary of the enemies surrounding us.

Without warning, bodies start raining from the sides of the arena, and chaos descends. The jeering mass in the stands burst into the air, buzzing and shrieking . Rolling away from us in all directions, the destroyer droid’s attention seems caught up in the new movement.

Obi-Wan and I exchange a look and duck, running for Anakin.

I swing my head to the right, the left, up to the screaming swarm. All around us lights flash as the area floor fills with more and more people. What I had perceived at first as falling bodies are not actually bodies but hundreds of Jedi! Rushing toward us, at the droids, at the bug-like aliens. More droids begin to march from the sides of the arena into a growing fray. I hadn’t imagined that my ears could hurt anymore than before. But the noise is greater now.

We reach Anakin, very much alive. I’m panting and Obi-Wan can’t think of a single witty thing to say.

Obi-Wan is pulling away from me, questions on his face and in his mouth, moving to Anakin. Only then do I realize that I had still been holding onto him. That old ache in my chest twinges. I barely have time to feel it as Anakin slides from the bull’s back to meet us. What they say to each other is lost in the noise but confusion is obvious in their faces. As I try to focus on their words and not on the roar of fighting, Anakin reaches for me. His hand grabs onto mine, still keeping eye-contact with Obi-Wan. They’ve agreed, it’s time to fight. With a quick squeeze of my hand, Anakin let’s go. He gives me a longing look but I can’t return it.

And then they’re striding into the maylay, both catching lightsabers tossed by a faceless ally. I sprint across the expanse of sand, snatching up a discarded blaster.

I’m actually glad for this distraction, if I can call the battle something so mild. I don’t want to dwell on my feelings anymore. I’m exhausted from the intense indecision of the afternoon. Today I’ve felt more like the little girl I was on Naboo than I have in years. I’ve let my emotions run rampant. Wild. My mind has spun in a downward spiral as I try to justify my obsession and it’s only left me with a bitter dissatisfaction. I can’t hold Anakin the way I’ve been trying to tell myself I want to. And still… I’ve no hope of ever approaching Obi-Wan.

But now it’s time to put all of that away.

Diplomacy doesn’t rest.

Neither do its enemies.

A/N: yeh. it’s V late but this daggum fic was such a struggle to write. I’m v thankful that I persevered though. it was worth it.

#obidala #star wars #prequels #episode 2 #aotc #attack of the clones #padme amidala #obi-wan kenobi #obiwan #anakin skywalker #kinda anti-anakin #established anakin and padme relationship #angst #fanfic #fanfiction #padme/obiwan #on ao3 and ff.net #leg stroke!#obidala thigh caress

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fantastic-nonsense · 6 years

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Alright folks, today we’re going to talk about Luke ‘Golden Boy’ Skywalker and the Throne Room fight, because I had the misfortune of running into someone who so fundamentally misunderstands Luke’s thoughts and actions during the Throne Room scene in Return of the Jedi that it sent Kill Bill sirens running through my head.

So! Luke “two seconds after hearing my father is a genocidal asshole who cut off my hand goes 'yeah no I can't kill him I'm gonna turn him instead with the power of love!'” Skywalker! He literally saves the entire galaxy with emotion and love! But it's a selfless love, not the selfish and fearful attachment that Anakin had towards Padme during ROTS while he was spiraling. It's compassion, not attachment. And therein lies the difference. That's why Luke becomes a full Jedi when he faces Palpatine and Vader in ROTJ; he learns to embody the entirety of what it fully means to be a Jedi during that fight in the throne room when instead of fighting he throws his lightsaber down and says "I will not fight you, Father." He chooses diplomacy, redemption, and love instead of vengeance. He chooses non-violence over power and control. He will believe in anyone, no matter what they’ve done to him or the people he loves, and would rather die than lose a chance at helping someone become their best selves. His defining moment is a radical act of embracing his feelings and choosing love.

Contrast this with earlier in the fight, when he loses control over his emotions and gives into the Dark Side, going buckwild crazy and getting to the point where he slices off Vader's own hand in a parallel mockery of the Bespin fight. Think about why that is what got Luke to stop and back down. He was so much more powerful when he was feeding off of the Dark Side, right? Using his negative emotions made him stronger, right? Yeah sure...in the short run. But what did he become in those few moments he drew on the Dark Side? What would he have become if he had kept doing it?

The Dark Side feeds on you. It turns you into something you're not. It whispers at you and tells you that you can do so much more, be so much more, if only you would let go and stop adhering to those pesky morals and values and codes. It turns good people like Anakin Skywalker into twisted, mottled versions of themselves that no one who knew them before can recognize because they are so trapped under their delusions of grandeur and desperate desire for power.

An interpretation of the Throne Room scene that has Luke throwing his weapon away and choosing pacifism because he’s giving up or accepting his fate or finally believes he can’t save Vader is wrong because it disregards Luke's agency as a character and his actions up to that point in the narrative.

I'd like to take a moment to bring in the big guns and pull two George Lucas quotes on everyone:

GEORGE LUCAS: Well, it is about transformation. And — and ultimately it’ll be about transformation of how young Anakin Skywalker became evil and then was redeemed by his son. But it’s also about transformation of how his son came to — to find the call. Luke works intuitively through most of the movie until he gets to the very end. Everything up to that point is very intuitive. He goes back and forth with his emotions about fighting his father or not fighting his father. Finally he comes to that decision to say, ‘No, this is — this is what I have to do. I have to simply throw my weapon down.’ And it’s only that way that he’s able to redeem his father, which ultimately is the issue. It’s not as apparent in the first three movies, but when you see the movies I haven’t made yet, that — the issue of how do we get Darth Vader back is really the central issue. How do we get him back to that little boy that he was in the first movie? That good person who loved and was generous and kind? [x]

And [compassion], Lucas says, is what “Star Wars” is really all about. Sure, there are also larger themes like what makes someone a hero, what is friendship, and what makes people sacrifice themselves for something larger, but really, it’s about compassion, and loving people.

“It’s still…you know…basically [just] don’t kill people, and be compassionate,” Lucas said in an interview with Charlie Rose at the Chicago Ideas Festival earlier this month. “Love people. That’s basically all ‘Star Wars’ is.”

Luke has ample opportunity to perpetuate the cycle of violence; he has Vader down on his knees! He cuts his hand off in a parallel to Bespin! And then he looks at Vader, sees himself in him (oh look! Parallels to the Cave in ESB!), and then makes the active choice to reject the cycle of violence and embrace non-violence and love instead:

Luke stared at his father’s twitching, severed, mechanical hand—and then at his own black-gloved artificial part—and realized suddenly just how much he’d become like his father. Like the man he hated. Trembling, he stood above Vader, the point of his glowing blade at the Dark Lord’s throat. He wanted to destroy this thing of Darkness, this thing that was once his father, this thing that was...him.

Suddenly the Emperor was there, looking on, chuckling with uncontrollable, pleased agitation. “Good! Kill him! Your hate has made you powerful! Now, fulfill your destiny and take your father’s place at my side!”

Luke stared at his father beneath him, then at the Emperor, then back at Vader. This was Darkness—and it was the Darkness he hated. Not his father, not even the Emperor. But the Darkness in them. In them, and in himself. And the only way to destroy the Darkness was to renounce it. For good and all. He stood suddenly erect, and made the decision for which he’d spent his life in preparation.

He hurled his lightsaber away. “Never! Never will I turn to the dark side! You have failed, Palpatine. I am a Jedi, as my father was before me.” -Return of the Jedi novelization

Luke is choosing compassion, love, and family over anger, fear, and hate. He's choosing to stand up and go "I am a Jedi, like my father before me" instead of bowing to the same temptation Anakin did. Any interpretation of this scene that frames Luke's decision as anything other than a radical act of defiance is misunderstanding the basic point of what Star Wars is trying to teach you. Dooku stands in front of Anakin at the beginning of ROTS at his mercy, and at Palpatine's goading, Anakin kills him. Vader stands in front of Luke at his mercy in the Throne Room, but though Palpatine goads him Luke turns around, throws away his lightsaber, and says "You've failed, your Highness. I am a Jedi, like my father before me." It's a cinematic parallel; it's Lucas deliberately working with the same themes and showing that Luke chooses a different path than his father, and through choosing that different path succeeds where his father (and the Jedi) failed: he pulls Vader back to the Light and saves the galaxy through an act of unconditional compassion and faith. It's not giving up; it's having faith.

Luke has spent the entirety of his interactions with Vader in ROTJ up to this point urging him to break free: "[Anakin Skywalker] is the name of your true self, you've only forgotten...I know there is good in you." "Search your feelings Father...you can't do this. I feel the conflict within you, let go of your hate." "Come with me." His entire conversation with Vader in that moment is one implicit "let me help you" plea.

His words in the Throne Room aren't for the Emperor's sake; they're for Vader's. "I am a Jedi, like my father before me." Even as he accepts certain death by his final denouncement of the Dark Side to Palpatine's face, he is still trying to save his father. Because that's what Luke Skywalker is: he is a clear and authoritative “Never! I’ll never turn to the dark side" in the face of certain death. He is, at his heart, the man who sees so clearly and who believes so completely that he casts aside his lightsaber rather than fight to save his own life—not because he’s given up or because he’s weak or a coward, but because of his faith—because Luke Skywalker will die sooner than give into hatred. He will lay down his weapon sooner than turn to darkness, and by his faith Anakin finds a way to struggle back to the light, kill Palpatine, and fulfill his destiny.

This is why viewing all six episodes as a single story instead of as two different stories is so important: Star Wars is ultimately a story about the Fall and Redemption of Anakin Skywalker...how he falls due to selfish love and the fear of loss and is saved through the unconditional love and compassion of his son. He is both damned and saved by the power of love. Luke succeeds where all of the other Jedi fail. And he succeeds by explicitly rejecting the desires and advice of Obi-Wan and Yoda (the metaphorical stand-ins for the Old Order), who tell him that Anakin is gone and Luke needs to kill him.

It is only through rejecting the tenets of the Old Order, embracing that selfless love and compassion and (positive) emotion, and having faith that Anakin can still be brought back that Luke succeeds, becomes a full-fledged Jedi, and saves the galaxy. He succeeds by embodying Padme and her final words of "I know there is still good in him" rather than Obi-Wan and the doctrines of the Old Order. He rejects both the Old Order and the Sith, and that is why he becomes “not the last of the Old Jedi, Luke, but the first of the New,” because he recognizes the flaws inherent in the Old Order’s teachings and is free to chart a new path forward. He succeeds by choosing love over fear and hate. As Matthew Stover so eloquently states in the Revenge of the Sith novelization, "The dark is generous and it is patient and it always wins – but in the heart of its strength lies its weakness: one lone candle is enough to hold it back. Love is more than a candle. Love can ignite the stars.”

#star wars #sw meta #star wars meta #luke skywalker #return of the jedi #long post #I'M GOING TO BANG POTS AND PANS AND SCREAM YOUR EARS OFF ABOUT MY BOY AND I'M NOT SORRY #ROTJ IS ABOUT LOVE AS A RADICAL ACT OF DEFIANCE IN THE FACE OF HATE #and anyone who sees Luke as *weak* in that moment is one big 'FUCK THAT NOISE' to me

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celebrate-the-clone-wars · 6 years

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10/17 Writing Wednesday Submit

Story: Tallying Scars Chapter: A Fading Echo (48 of ??) Published: Wattpad (https://my.w.tt/tLMf7qqYZQ)

CONTENT:

“Fives? Are you- do you- wanna talk about it?” Tup asked quietly, his voice small and unsure. Fives, lying face down on Echo’s bunk in the barracks, turned his head slightly so that he was facing the wall.

“Okay, maybe later then.” Tup sighed, shoulders sagging in defeat as he turned away. They were much narrower in breadth, Rex suddenly realized, than either his or his other brothers of same age, and he wondered if he had ever looked that young and vulnerable.

Glancing about the barracks he noticed for the first time that the younger recruits were slimmer in build and slightly shorter than the Old Guard were, and it made his breath catch in his throat. They were all just so… young. Echo had only been ten years old and four months when he’d- and most of the newest troops were still nine. Rex himself was just shy of eleven and a half and aside from Jesse, Brye, and Kix he was the oldest there. Ailen and Denal had both only just turned eleven.

The door opened and they all started sharply as General Kenobi halted in the entrance, wary of stepping fully in and crossing some sort of unspoken line that they were all aware existed. To invade the personal space of those who had never had nor never would have anything else left to call their own without prior consent was a serious matter.

“Any news?” Rex asked. His voice was hoarse. Obi-wan shook his head ‘no,’ eyes dark with defeat. The room, only seconds before full of hope, seemed to have the light sucked out of it.

“No. They still haven’t found her yet.”

“First we lose-” Brye swallowed heavily as everyone turned to look at him. His eyes were dark and shimmering with suppressed tears. “And now Ahsoka’s gone missing. Are we cursed or something?”

“Or are we making up for lost time?” a Shiny asked sourly. “We’ve had the lowest casualty to difficulty of assignment ratio in the entire frontlines GAR since the war started. Are we catching up with everyone else?”

“You weren’t on Teth,” Ailen snapped, eyes blazing hot with anger. “Don’t ever say we’ve had it lucky with our numbers.” Obi-wan managed to catch Rex’s eye as the entire barracks erupted into loud and angry argument, and the two slipped out into the hall.

“Anakin won’t leave the Temple,” Kenobi explained quietly. It was easy for Rex to see, after having spent extended time with the man, that he was upset. “He won’t even leave the tactical room. Nothing I say seems to make a difference.”

“I’ll have a word with him,” Rex assured. Obi-wan gave an appreciative nod, hesitated before laying a comforting hand briefly on the Captain’s shoulder, and then departed. Rex braced himself before walking back in to the chaos.

“ALL RIGHT THAT’S ENOUGH!” He shouted. The entire barracks froze, all eyes wide and shocked. Rex never yelled at them when he could more effectively issue commands with quiet authority. He cleared his throat and then continued on with soft disappointed firmness, which scared them more. When he sounded disappointed it meant he was so angry that he was physically restraining himself from throttling someone (usually Hardcase or Brye).

“This is a difficult time for the entire Company. If we’re gonna get through this we need to stick together. We’re not cursed, and we’re not lucky. We’re skilled, and we use smart tactics. You can’t expect the newcomers to understand what it was like at the beginning, and the newcomers can’t expect the veterans to understand the pressure they have since their training ended before it was completed. But we can all understand just fine that we’re scared, and that we’re hurting. Focus on what you do know and put aside what you don’t, because I promise you this: if we can’t come together now then this will tear us apart. And the next time we gear up to fight it’s likely most of us won’t be coming back.” He fixed them with a tired look.

“I’m going to the Temple to check in with Skywalker,” he continued in a normal tone and stress of voice. “I expect you to have figured it out by the time I get back. Fives, with me. Better wear your formal fatigues.”

\•!•!•!•!•!•!•!•/

Rex hadn’t actually been sure that Fives would obey, but a few minutes later they had left the Coruscant GAR barracks and were headed for the Jedi Temple in their smart formal uniforms. As usual, people stopped what they were doing long enough to stare; it was rare that they ever got to see a clone trooper out of armor or even simply with their helmets off.

“They look so young,” someone whispered. To anyone else it would have been impossible to catch the words, but they had been trained to utilize all their senses to their utmost and optimum efficiency, and it carried easily. Rex’s step faltered slightly, breaking perfect and subconscious rhythm with Fives.

“Sir?” He murmured uncertainly.

“I’m fine. Just… it’s been a hard few days.” Fives nodded in understanding, swallowing hard to stop himself from crying in a public venue. “The Temple’s not far. Come on.”

They had been raised to suppress their feelings. Emotions were messy and inconvenient, so unlike the machine efficiency the Kaminoans wanted and so incredibly sentient that they had no place in the perfect slave army. If you had a problem, you dealt with it rationally and compartmentalized. Above all, the issue was not to interfere with one’s work.

It meant that they had a hard time properly expressing grief or trauma, and it was leading to a lot of problems with PTS and ghosting. There was no counseling in the GAR because they didn’t require it. Truth was, they probably required it just for the problem that they didn’t.

Rex shook his head slightly. He was confusing himself now. But one thing struck him as something of note, and that had been his knee-jerk reaction to immediately label himself and his brothers as part of a slave army. Did he really think that?

They passed by a group of civilians protesting the war and the use of the clone army and was surprised to find that he actually did.

They’d had no choice but to go out and fight. To serve and take orders unquestioningly. They’d been born for it, and it was all they knew how to do. They had no pay, no leave. Just the endless toil until they eventually died or the war ended, whichever came first.

If given the choice, Echo would probably have become a teacher to a young group of children instead of fight.

“Why did you take me with you, sir?” Fives asked quietly as they ascended the Temple’s steps.

“You needed a change of scenery, and you’ve never been.”

“I didn’t need a-”

“Fives.”

“…Thanks.” He was looking anywhere except into Rex’s eyes. “I’m not taking this well.”

“You just lost your last Squad Brother. I wouldn’t expect you to.” Fives hesitated before speaking again.

“Ever had it happen to you?”

“No.”

“Really?” He registered surprise. “I thought, because it’s just you and Brye…”

“Most do.” Rex’s smile was dark. “Teri, Aeric, and Chester. Our other squad mates. We were too good at what we did, unfortunately. They separated us for specialized training in different respective fields right before Geo I. That was the last time we fought together, and I got split from the rest early into the battle. Haven’t seen them since, and I don’t know where they’re stationed so I can’t call. Don’t have the time to look either, the way you guys keep me running about putting out fires.”

“I think that’s worse than knowing they’re gone,” Fives murmured sympathetically. “The not knowing.” They were walking through the ornate halls with the vaulted ceilings now. Rex considered for a moment.

“I suppose. But I wouldn’t wish either on anyone for the world.”

“No.”

They went to talk to General Skywalker in the Tactical Room, and while they couldn’t get him to leave or sleep they did succeed in persuading him to eat something, which was a small victory that they were willing to accept. Afterward, Rex made a detour accompanied by a confused Fives to the Room of a Thousand Fountains.

Rex was pretty sure they weren’t supposed to just roam the Temple without supervision when the area wasn’t designated as military for the duration of the war, but no one seemed to care that they were there. In fact, they passed several Jedi both too old and too young to do any field fighting as they moved through the little pools and rivers to sit in the soft, thick grass next to the waterfall.

The holographic ceiling portrayed a synthetic view of the stars visible in the Coruscant night sky above them, and they laid out on their backs side by side and just soaked in the peace and calm for a while.

After a little bit Fives hesitantly tapped Rex on the top of his hand. He was asking. Rex responded in like kind to let him know it was okay, and they entwined their fingers together. Just laid there, looking at the stars and missing their brothers, quietly grieving for Echo. Rex didn’t need to look over to see that Fives was crying.

Things had quieted down by the time they got back to barracks; everyone was heaped together in a mess of blankets and pillows on the floor. Legs and arms were tangled hopelessly together, everyone needing the reassurance of the warmth of their brothers beside them that night. Fives and Rex exchanged a glance before changing into their fatigues and worming their way into the group.

\•!•!•!•!•!•!•!•/

When Ahsoka got back from her ordeal as Trandoshan ceremonial hunting prey she was pretty shaken, and she was admitted immediately into the Temple’s med wing with the other Padawans. While she was in there she had terrible nightmares, so when she was released Obi-wan and Anakin decided to camp out in front of her quarters for the first night or so to let her know that she was safe and that she wasn’t alone.

They had a hard time even getting close to the door because they had to step over 150 sleeping troopers who had already beaten them to it, but eventually they fell asleep against the wall with Obi-wan’s head resting against Anakin’s shoulder and Anakin’s chin resting on his forehead. Fives was curled into a tight ball against Rex’s side a few feet away surrounded by the rest of the Old Guard.

Everyone needed companionship every now and again, even troopers and Jedi.

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julez-the-great · 7 years

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Unexpected--Anakin Skywalker x Reader

“Practice with Anakin, you shall,” your master, Yoda, told you. You looked towards the padawan in front of you, a smirk eminent on his face.

“Leave now, Master Kenobi, we will,” the short green master said, hobbling out of the courtyard with Obi-Wan Kenobi, leaving both you an Anakin alone to train.

“My name’s Anakin, it’s a pleasure to meet you,” he said confidently, holding out his hand. You quietly stood, shaking his hand with a gentle squeeze, a small smile played on your face.

“M-my name’s (y/n),” you stuttered quietly, causing the boy in front of you to smile. You had wished that Master Yoda stayed with you, not leaving you with some strange boy–he knew you had trouble interacting with new people.

“Well, (y/n), my master has told me that we’re on the same level of skill, so this shouldn’t be too bad, right?” Anakin declared. You nodded your head, avoiding his gaze. You have heard so much about Anakin from your master and it had made you apprehensive.

“Let’s get started then, shall we?”

–

You blushed furiously as Anakin had you finally pinned to the ground. You two have been practicing your combative moves for about an hour and a half and each match ended with you winning.

“It’s about time that I won,” Anakin said, breathing heavily as he sat up not yet standing. He was straddling you, catching his breath before finally standing, holding out his hand for you to grab. You grabbed it, being pulled up onto your feet.

“Thanks,” you said, stretching your arms and legs, before sitting down on the ground. You rested your hands on your knees and looked at the serene courtyard. You felt the force buzz with life upon looking at the foliage.

“Anakin, meditate with me,” you said, patting the patch of grass in front of you. He sat down, mirroring your position. Relaxing, you closed your eyes and expelled every thought from your mind.

You began to feel the buzz of the force intensify and the feeling of yourself drifting farther and farther from your physical body. Your breathing began to slow and you began to levitate slightly off of the ground in your state of complete concentration. The force was enveloping you like a warm blanket. You welcomed it–it was here in this peace where you could find solace from everyone and everything.

’(Y/n),’ you heard your name echo through empty space. Concentrating more, you began to see Anakin’s life force, a rush of embarassment washing over you, someone had infiltrated your hiding spot.

‘Why are you here?’ You spoke to him, watching his life force manifest into his physical form. ‘How did you get here?’

‘We’re not so different, you and i. This is also the plane in which I seek residence since very few can reach this level of clear-mindedness,’ he spoke. You furrowed your brows before opening your eyes to the bright light around you. You were more at peace and observed how Anakin quickly opened his eyes, looking at you intently.

“Why’d you leave?” Anakin quizzed you, slightly upset that you left.

“I’m just not used to seeing another person there, except for Master Yoda, that is,” you sighed, laying back onto the grass and staring to the sky. The gentle breeze blew some leaves high into the sky and you could hear the distant sound of various transporters in the distance.

“You don’t have to be so bashful around me–I know you’re more than capable of winning a fight against me,” he said lightheartedly, trying to ease your discomfort. You just continued to lay there, staring up at the sky silently.

“I can’t help it,” you said quietly, hoping for this conversation to end. “It just happens.”

“Well, you’re going to be stuck with me so we better become the best of friends,” he said, sitting on the grass beside you. The breeze blew and you two sat in silence until the both of your masters came back.

“Back, we are,” you heard Yoda say, causing you and Anakin to stand up tiredly.

“Well, it looks like you guys had a good day of practicing,” Obi-Wan said, shooting Anakin a playful grin.

“Oh master, she got me down so many times, you wouldn’t believe,” he said, glancing at you briefly. You felt your cheeks heat up as you nodded, waiting for your master to whisk you away.

“On a walk, we shall go, (y/n) and I,” Yoda said before walking into a random direction. Giving your training partner and his master a wave, you walked beside Yoda, reveling in the silence between the both of you.

–

About a week later, you found yourself alone with Anakin once more, this time, the both of you had only run into each other by chance.

“Oh, good evening, (y/n). I didn’t see you walking,” he said, smiling to himself. “Where are you headed?”

“O-Oh, I’m just going to the courtyard to meditate,” you said, trying to maintain eye contact with your fellow padawan. He continued smiling as he began to reply.

“Would you mind if I joined you? At least let me walk you there,” he pleaded. You gave him an uneasy smile, deciding that it was time to be adventurous for once.

“I wouldn’t mind,” you said, voice raising in pitch. His smile didn’t falter as he paved the way to the courtyard. You caught up to him quickly, your robe flowing behind you, desperate to catch up.

“Where were you headed to, Anakin?” You asked him, hands shaky and a lump beginning to form in your throat. You both had arrived at the courtyard when he began answering.

“I was just heading to my room for the night. These last few days have been rough for me and Obi-Wan,” he admitted. “So, where do you want to go on this beautiful night?”

“By the tree,” you said, pointing over to a lone tree that stood in the middle of a field. “It’s nice over there.”

The both of you settled under the tree facing each other. You sat up straight and closed your eyes, releasing all of the thoughts that clouded your mind. Soon, the darkness behind your lids turned into small networks where you could see the force surround different objects. You felt heavy as you levitated off of the ground and had achieved total relaxation and concentration in letting all things go into the hands of the force.

Finally, it had happened–you had reached total and complete zen. Your surroundings were in complete clarity as your life force floated about, weaving in and out through the network and fabric of the force. In the distance, you spotted the green hue that you knew as Master Yoda. You approached him and settled before him, reveling in your complete peace.

“A great achievement to come here, it is,” you heard your master say proudly. You nodded slightly, feeling the buzzing of life around you. “Extremely strong with the force, you are. Waiting, I have been, proud , I am. Return now, you shall.”

You inhaled deeply and then released it, opening your eyes to see various rocks scattered around you and Anakin staring directly at you, seemingly concerned. You smiled widely.

“It’s about time you joined back. You were out of it for about an hour and a half,” Anakin told you, confused at your large smile.

“Anakin, I reached it,” you said quickly, excitement overcoming you. He seemed even more confused as he raised an eyebrow.

“What do you possibly mean?” He asked you, curious about your rambling.

“I can meditate in the same plane as Master Yoda now,” you squealed, tapping your fingers on your knees. Anakin’s expression turned from confused into extremely happy.

“How? You must meditate a lot,” he said, standing up and stretching his tired limbs. You nodded your head, also standing. A shiver then ran down your spine as you realized how cold it truly was outside. Anakin seemed to notice, as he removed his robe and placed it around you, even though you already had your on. You felt the heat creep up onto your cheeks.

“Let’s go to bed, yeah?” He asked, guiding you into the Jedi Temple and escorting you to your room.

–

The next morning, you left your room to see the one and only Anakin Skywalker waiting for you. A slight blush crossed your features as you looked to the ground.

“Good morning, Anakin. What brings you here?” You asked him, shuffling your feet.

“Well, I was wondering if you wanted to hang out today, being that it is our free day. That is, if you don’t already have something planned,” he spouted quickly, looking over to the wall.

“That actually sounds pretty nice,” you replied, now looking up at the boy before you. He smiled dreamily, happy that you accepted his offer.

“Shall we get some breakfast?” He asked you, snapping out of his day dream. You giggled and nodded, walking with him when he left your doorway.

Unbeknownst to you, both of the masters were lurking by, monitoring every move the both of you made. Hope surged through Yoda as he realized that his plan may work–the plan to prevent Anakin from turning to the dark side.

“I think the plan is going smoothly, don’t you think, Master Yoda?” Obi-Wan said. Yoda smiled, another vision coming to him that contradicted the horrific one he had before.

“Believe so, I do. Observe further, we shall,” Yoda replied, causing the Kenobi to also smile.

–

“Anakin, you’re going to get us killed!” You exclaimed. A large smile appeared on his face as he zoomed by yet another transporter.

“No I’m not, I know what I’m doing,” he replied cockily. Who knew that Anakin Skywalker had an ego as big as a planet. “And besides, we have arrived at the destination.”

The both of you exited the cruiser and felt the stable land. You looked ahead to see a large building before you. Your stomach did flips as Anakin lead you to the building. You stopped suddenly, causing the padawan before to stop, turning to look at you.

“It’ll be fun, I promise. You don’t have to talk to anyone else besides me,” Anakin said, trying his best to ease your worries. You released a deep breath, nodding to him. You both walked up the steps to the building and opened the large doors to hear loud music that rattled your being. Anakin pulled you close to him as the both of you entered the bustling club, immediately heading to the bar.

“I’ll have two Blind Jedi’s please,” Anakin told the bartender who in turn began making the drinks. You observed your surroundings, watching as beings of all races dance, drink, or socialize. There were many lights that flashed all around and in different colors to the beat of the upbeat music. This was your first time in a club–Yoda never really got out of the Jedi-business realm.

“Here,” Anakin said to you, snapping you out of your thoughts. In both of his hands he held the same drink–some clear liquid with red juice all contained within a glass.

“What is it?” You asked him, cautiously taking one of the drinks from his hand. You then put the straw to your lips, tasting this delicious concoction.

“Lemon-lime soda and cherry juice. Good?” You nodded, enjoying the taste of this drink. Anakin then walked over to an empty booth and sat down, sinking into the seat cushion. You follow suit, relaxing into the fabric of the seat, casually sipping the drink that Anakin had gotten for you. Luckily enough, this drink was also soothing your worried body.

The music changed drastically as the lights shifted into the fierce colors of orange, yellow, and red. The music had changed from a pop style into one that consisted of a Latin tone. Anakin’s face lit up. Downing the rest of his drink, he placed the now empty glass on the table and stood.

“Would you like to dance?” He asked you. You looked around and saw that everyone wouldn’t be paying any mind to what the two of you were doing. You placed your empty glass next to Anakin’s and stood up, following him onto the crowded dance floor. The music was so loud that you could feel the beat erupting from the floor.

“I don’t know how to dance,” you said to Anakin sheepishly. He smiled, happy that you were open to learning something new, something outside of the norm.

“Just move your hips and feel the beat!” He exclaimed, beginning to show off his moves. He didn’t know what he was doing, but he was having a great time while doing it. Following his lead, you began to freely move, a smile appearing on your face. The song all too quickly came to a close as Anakin escorted you off the dance floor and to the bar once more, ordering two more Blind Jedi’s. He handed one of the cold glasses to you.

“That was actually a lot of fun,” you told him, surprised at your own actions. You took a sip of the drink and instantly felt more refreshed.

“Same here,” Anakin replied, looking deeply into your (e/c) eyes. You stared back into his deep blue eyes, everything around you slowing down as you focused on his gaze.

“Let’s get back to the temple, yeah?” He asked you, pulling you away from your trance. Blushing, you nodded your head, drinking the last bit of your drink before weaving you way to the outside world.

The sun was high in the sky, indicating that it was lunch time. You followed Anakin back to the cruiser and hopped in, buckling yourself up and hoping that he wouldn’t drive around recklessly.

“Don’t look so scared, (y/n),” he joked before starting the engine and zooming off into the city. The city was pretty nice and you liked the opportunities you got to escape the temple. You watched the tall buildings zip past you and how other drivers were also going somewhere on this busy planet.

“I had a fun time, Anakin,” you said quietly, not removing your eyes from the landscape before you. He smiled, pulling into the temple and stopping the engine on the space craft.

“The club is always an exciting place to go since it’s never the same there,” he said, before exiting the cruiser and opening the door for you on your side. Nodding a thanks to him, you also exited, heading up the steps and inside of the entrance to the temple.

–

That night, you sat on your bed wearing your pajamas and crossed our legs. You then began to relax your body, allowing the force to cradle you in its soft cushion. Expelling every thought from your mind, you ascended into the bliss that the force had offered you. Once again, you found yourself at the peak of total emptiness, but this time you were all alone. Your surroundings showed you everything that was around you, and you could even see some life forces walking through the halls by your room. But non of these solved the loneliness that you felt at this moment. Sighing, you allowed yourself to descend down a level in your meditation. The force was slightly fuzzy in this realm, but you knew that Anakin would be here if he was mediating. You compelled your life force to move around the maze of the temple until you reached the room of Anakin Skywalker. Then you saw the soft blue glow of his spirit, meditating.

‘Anakin,’ you whispered, causing him to shed a small smile. ‘I’ve been looking for you.’

‘I guess it gets lonely at the top, eh?’ He joked, causing a smile to grace your features. ‘You should come over so we don’t have to concentrate our energy on communication.’

‘But curfew is in ten minutes,’ you said, worried that you would be caught going back to your room from Anakin’s.

‘Then let’s have a sleep over,’ he replied before his life force went pale, alerting you that he stopped focusing his energy. You then opened your eyes to see the dim light of your room illuminating over you. Quickly, you gathered some clothing for tomorrow and threw your robe on, tying it so that you weren’t walking around in you pajamas openly. Next, you grabbed your saber before sneaking out into the bright hallway and making your way down to Anakin’s room. You knocked on it lightly before it opened to reveal Anakin. He was also in his pajamas.

“Well, come inside,” Anakin insisted, pulling you into his room. His room was much like yours–a bed, a couch, coffee table, and a bathroom. The closet was right next to the bathroom and there was a small window on the wall farthest from you. You placed our clothes onto the coffee table before taking our robe off and placing next to Anakin’s on the coat hanger. You then made yourself comfortable on the couch.

“You’ve never told me where you’re from, Anakin. I don’t remember ever training with you up until now,” you asked suddenly, causing the padawan in front of you to stiffen. He coughed awkwardly before sitting beside you on the couch, resting his feet on the coffee table.

“I was a slave on Tatooine when I was young. I can’t quite remember why Qui-Gon Jinn and Obi-Wan were there, but they found me and took me under their wing. Shortly after Qui-Gon’s death, Obi-Wan became my master,” Anakin said, recollecting the times that he had spent with his young master.

“Oh,” you said sadly, hoping that you didn’t hurt the feelings of your only true friend. He smiled, patting your back before walking over to his closet, grabbing a board game.

“Wanna play something?”

–

The game ended in anguish as Anakin let out a troubled sound, realizing that he had lost once more. You smirked triumphantly as you moved your game piece into the final space of the game, satisfied that you had won. Grumbling, Anakin proceeded to put the game away into the closet as you put a stray pillow on the couch, readying yourself for bed.

“(y/n), I’m not letting you sleep there. You’re going to sleep on the bed so that I can sleep on the couch,” Anakin pushed, noticing you preparing the couch for slumber.

“No, Anakin, I’ll sleep on the couch,” you protested, watching the young man approach you, pulling you off of the couch and guiding you to his bed.

“No, you’re a guest in this room so you sleep in absolute comfort. Besides, I wont feel bad if I slept on the couch,” he stated, causing you to sigh dramatically. He laughed as he laid on the couch, pulling a blanket over him and resting his head onto the pillow. “You’re so stubborn.”

“Look who’s talking,” you giggled, turning to face Anakin who was looking at you as he laid on the couch. His face contorted into one of false hurt.

“I am offended that you would call me stubborn,” he faked, turning over to face the back of the couch. You laughed more as you turned to lay on your stomach, grabbing onto the pillow.

“Goodnight, Anakin,” you sang, yawning shortly after. He let out a defeated sigh as he became more comfortable releasing a, “goodnight (y/n),” in the process.

–

The next morning, you were awoken to a subtle knocking at the door. The light taps indicated that someone had arrived to alert Anakin of something. Quickly, you rolled off of the bed and stood beside the couch, shaking Anakin awake.

“Anakin, if you don’t answer, I’m coming in,” the both of you heard Obi-Wan say. Anakin’s eyes widened as he stumbled off of the couch and to the door, opening it carefully.

“Good morning, master. What brings you here this early in the morning?” Anakin said, stretching his arms up. Obi-Wan looked passed him and inside of the room to see another robe hanging on his coat hanger.

“Firstly, it is ten, second, why do you have another robe?” He asked his padawan, awaiting for his answer. Anakin’s heart rate increased and he had to quickly think up a lie.

“Oh, that’s (y/n)’s. She forgot it at dinner last night. A shame really, it’s nice and soft and is just a fantastic piece of material,” Anakin blabbered on, trying to cover his tracks. Obi-Wan saw right through his lie, but decided to not pursue, knowing that he was covering for both himself and (y/n).

“Very well then. Master Yoda and I will meet the both of you in the gardens,” Obi-Wan said slyly, smirking to himself. Anakin nodded before shutting the door.

“You ramble when you’re nervous. Did you know that?” You asked him, now fully clothed in your day clothes. He looked at you confused.

“How’d you change so fast?”

–

It had finally happened–you singed Anakin with you light saber during a practice session. He writhed in pain as he sat on the ground, holding his arm close to him. You were distraught and felt extremely guilty for doing this. Both of your sabers were now on the ground, deactivated.

“Anakin! I’m so sorry!” You yelled, panic beginning to take over you. Quickly, you helped him up and off of the ground. He groaned in agony as he slumped over, leaning onto you for support. The both of you then walked to the medical ward, causing a few surprised nurses to spring to action.

“We’ll take it from here dear,” she told you before taking Anakin away and into a separate room. You huffed out a breath, frustrated that you had caused Anakin this pain. As you sat, the only thing that occupied your mind was all things Anakin. One thought that struck your mind was that he would never forgive you, that he wouldn’t want to see you again. This thought made you all the more upset.

It must have been fifteen minutes before Anakin emerged from the office, arm wrapped up, and a renewed smile on his face. To be burned so seriously, he sure was taking this as if it were a minor scratch.

“Anakin, I’m so sorry,” you said, walking up to him and giving him a giant hug. He chuckled, patting your back with his uninjured arm.

“It’s all right. These things happen,” he said, trying to ease your worries. Anakin didn’t enjoy to see you upset. It hurt him to see you in this state of despair. He cared for you a lot and just wanted you to be happy. “Let’s get back to the gardens to train some more.”

Anakin lead the way, as always, and you followed him like a shadow did in the middle of the day. The long wasn’t too long from where you were and before you knew it, you were back in the gardens. Anakin picked up his saber and held it with both hands, waiting for you to grab yours. Begrudgingly, you grabbed your saber, letting the green beam of light grace you with its presence. Soon, the two of you began to duel, only for Anakin to win the matches to follow.

“What’s wrong? You’re usually the one with the upper hand,” Anakin observed, sitting beside you in the grass. Flowers of many colors were surrounding you as you reflected upon his words. He picked one of the (f/c) flowers and placed it neatly behind your ear. A small smile appeared on your face, but you still looked anywhere but him.

“I don’t want to hurt you again,” you stated, watching the breeze blow the many flowers around you. He scoffed.

“And why’s that? You wouldn’t let it go so far as to kill me,” he stated, picking at his fingernails. You shrugged your shoulders.

“I don’t like to see you hurt, Anakin, especially by my hand,” you announced standing up suddenly and walking three feet ahead of you. “I don’t know how you can still trust me after what happened not even an hour ago.”

Anakin stood quickly, walking to stand in front of you, placing his hands onto your arms. You looked down to the grass growing underneath your feet, it’s green shade capturing your attention. You felt Anakin’s cold hand then tilt your chin up to look at him.

“I don’t think there is anything that can ever make me not trust you, (y/n),” he explained, dropping his hands to his side. It was then that you captured a different sight inside of Anakin’s eyes, one that you have never seen before.

“I guess it’s because I care about you too much to hurt you,” you whispered so only he could hear. A shy smile graced his features as your heads began to drift closer, ever so slowly.

“Believe it or not I care about you too. More than friends,” Anakin said the same volume you had. Butterflies were fluttering around your stomach as your lips connected.

“If I were the both of you, I wouldn’t be doing this in the gardens,” the both of you heard Obi-Wan say loudly, causing you two to separate. Both of your cheeks were red.

“Oh, master, I didn’t see you there,” Anakin said, avoiding his master’s gaze. Obi-Wan smirked as Yoda emerged from a bush waddling over to you two. Your blush grew and spread to your neck and ears.

“O-oh Master Yoda. Beautiful day isn’t it?” You asked, doing everything in your power to make this situation less awkward. The both of you have just broken the code and the last person who wanted to know was standing before you.

“Fear not, my padawan. Willed it, the force has. Distract you from your training, let it not,” was all he said, a smile on his face. You were shocked, but happy that this was approved.

“Come now, given a mission, we have been,” Yoda said before turning his back and walking inside the temple. You shot Anakin a gentle smile before following your master to wherever your mission lead you.

#anakin x reader #anakin skywalker x reader #anikan skywalker #anikin skywalker #reader insert #yoda and obi-wan are your biggest shippers #master yoda #obi wan kenobi #master kenobi #padawan anakin #padawan reader #shy reader #latin music #star wars shirley temples #they're called blind jedis

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mostthingskenobi · 7 years

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CHAPTER 3: THE VOICE -- The Dark Side of Obi-Wan Kenobi - Part 2

SUMMARY: Obi-Wan faces some hard truths, but the needling voice in the back of his mind is making it difficult to concentrate. Yoda lays down the law and Kenobi is not pleased. I promise the story is going to start getting more interesting now :)

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CHAPTER 3: The Voice

Coruscant – Jedi Temple

On the following morning Doctor Neema approved Obi-Wan’s release. Anakin brought him a change of clothes so he would not have to walk through the temple in medical garb. There was something oddly comforting about his familiar tunic and trousers. He ritualistically wrapped the fabrics around his bruises and scars, carefully pulling his high, stiff collar against the laceration, now a painless ragged white line that twisted around his neck. Two days ago the thought of doing this would have been unbearable.

He stared at his reflection in the small looking glass mounted on the wall, turning his head to inspect the deep, discolored scar that spread from above his brow to below his cheekbone. It still ached but at least his vision was intact. The line was dark, purplish, and sharp at the ends, no longer puckered and swollen.

He straitened up and ran his hands down his tunic smoothing out the last minute wrinkle. “This will have to do,” he said resignedly. He wrapped his belt around his waist and was surprised to find he had to pull it tighter than usual. He methodically tugged on his boots then stepped out into the hall where Anakin waited for him.

“You look almost normal,” Skywalker said boisterously.

“There’s a compliment in there, I’m sure,” Kenobi replied dryly with a wry smile.

“Good to see you up and about it is.”

The two men turned to see Yoda approaching.

“Thank you, Master,” Obi-Wan said bowing slightly.

“So what do you want to do first?” Anakin asked thumping Obi-Wan on the back. “Room of a Thousand Fountains? The temple lake? The mess hall? I don’t know about you but I’m starving.”

Obi-Wan arched an eyebrow. Food was always a solution for Anakin. “I don’t mean to be rude but I’d rather simply go to my quarters. Don’t worry about me. If you’re hungry, Anakin, you should go eat.”

Skywalker exchanged quick looks with Yoda before responding. “No, no, I’ll stay with you.”

Spying on me? Kenobi thought.

“Accompany you to your rooms we will,” Yoda said determinedly.

“As you wish,” Obi-Wan replied.

They made their way through the temple, meandering down corridors, taking the lift, and entering the section where Council members lived.

Obi-Wan was surprised by how strong his body felt. The Force is truly a miraculous healer, he thought. However, he could not quell the hyperactive flutter in his core, the sense that something inside him was not as it should be. He still had not recovered his memories of how he healed; it was disturbing to have such a defining gap in his thoughts.

Something about his Force signature was unnatural. He was unnatural.

You are rage…

He gave a little start as the thought crept into his mind.

He walked on, blindly following Anakin, completely oblivious to his surroundings.

You are revenge…

Obi-Wan could only focus on the voice inside his head. His eyes grew wide and unblinking. His breath grew shallow and shaky.

You are hunger…

There was nothing but darkness around him.

You are thirst…

A crushing emptiness.

You are destruction…

“Here we are,” Anakin chirped. He turned to Obi-Wan and was surprised to find him staring blankly at the wall, his face pale. Skywalker placed a hand gently on Kenobi’s shoulder. “Are you alright?”

Obi-Wan slowly blinked and came back to himself. He looked at Anakin as the darkness around him receded. “I’m fine.” He sounded like he was trying to convince himself.

Kenobi ignored the strange look Skywalker gave him. He realized they were standing at his own front door so he placed his palm on the keypad and the durasteel panel slid open. The room was adumbral; the blinds covering the wall of windows cast eerie horizontal shadows on the simple furniture.

“Home sweet home…” Obi-Wan said awkwardly. He was reluctant to enter at first; something felt unfamiliar. He placed his hands on either doorjamb and took a steadying breath. The last time he had been in his quarters he was hurrying about, preparing to depart for Mandalore to rescue Satine.

Finally, sensing Yoda and Anakin’s apprehension, he forced himself to step through the door.

Anakin immediately went into the kitchen and started the kettle for tea – old Padawan habits die hard – while Obi-Wan and Yoda sat down in the living chamber.

“There are things we must discuss,” the Grand Master said, settling across from Kenobi.

Obi-Wan had been expecting this. He crossed his legs casually, resting his left ankle on his right knee, and leaned back. He waited patiently for Yoda to speak.

“First, I must say, how grateful I am for your recovery. You are a Jedi with unparalleled fortitude.”

Kenobi looked away, shamed by the intended compliment. A man with unparalleled fortitude would not beg for mercy nor wish to die. He had done both, kneeling at Maul’s feet.

Yoda paused, taking stock of the younger man. “Distressed by my words already you are,” he said with concern in his voice. “What troubles you, Obi-Wan?”

“Nothing, Master,” Kenobi said, wrenching his emotions under control. “Please forgive me.”

Yoda instantly dropped the formalities, deciding to get directly to the point. He jabbed his gimer stick in Obi-Wan’s direction. “Fool me you cannot. Your wounds healed they may be, but your mind, full of darkness it still is. You will not be allowed to carry on indulging your anger.”

Obi-Wan’s lips inadvertently curled and his eyes narrowed. I beg your pardon. Allowed?

He suddenly felt Anakin reach out to him through the Force. Easy, Master. Just hear him out.

Kenobi almost rolled his eyes. He swallowed his indignation and refocused on the Grand Master. “Perhaps a few months in the Agri Corps is all I need.”

Yoda was not amused by the jibe. “Your status as a Council member is in question.”

Obi-Wan was clearly surprised by the comment.

“Understood it is that many times you have broken the Jedi Code.”

The noise in the kitchen suddenly stopped.

“What?” Obi-Wan could not believe his ears. “I’ve given my life to the Code.”

Anakin moved into the kitchen doorway, warily watching the exchange between the two masters. He had not expected Yoda to breach this subject so quickly; he had hoped the Council would give Kenobi at least a few days to adjust before delivering such potentially devastating news.

“Attachment is your downfall, Obi-Wan,” Yoda asserted.

The words stung like a slap in the face. Kenobi flinched and looked away.

“Attachment to your Padawan with whom you refuse to break your training bond. Attachment to your master for whom you constantly mourn. Attachment to the Duchess of Mandalore…”

“Please don’t,” Obi-Wan interrupted pleadingly. Kenobi was visibly distressed. “You’re right. Attachment is one of my many downfalls.”

Yoda’s voice softened. “You are not being punished for your weaknesses, Obi-Wan. The Council cannot accept you back until prove you can that you are true to the Code once more. Council members must all be held to a certain standard and you are no exception. See we must that ready for the burden you are.”

Obi-Wan ran a nervous hand over his face as his emotions quickly overwhelmed him. Maul had stripped him of this as well; he had lost his belief in the Jedi Code and therefore lost his place of honor on the High Council. The Sith had truly ruined him.

The Grand Master climbed down from his seat and made his way over to Kenobi, standing directly in front of him. “Obi-Wan, listen to me now,” Yoda said gently. “I will speak only truth to you. Harsh sometimes it may be, but willing I am not to lose such a valued Jedi to the Dark path. Sense you do that something is not right, that you are unbalanced?”

Obi-Wan clenched his jaw, biting back the incredible fear rising in his gorge. “Yes. Something is wrong with me,” he quietly admitted.

Yoda closed his eyes and hummed his agreement. “Hmmm, sense it I do, yes. Your connection to the Force, altered it is.” He looked up in time to see Kenobi shiver as though a chill ran up his body. “Find a solution we will, Obi-Wan.”

Everything… Kenobi’s mind was racing. I’ve lost everything…

The younger Jedi Master was trembling with frustration; he looked like he was about to devolve into a full panic attack. Yoda placed a hand on his shoulder. “Breathe, Obi-Wan.”

Anakin took a quick step forward but the Grand Master held up a hand, signaling him to remain where he stood.

Satine… Obi-Wan could feel the darkness returning, creeping in around his mind’s edges. Please help me…

Yoda watched as a change came over Kenobi; the young man’s eyes grew wide and empty and his head suddenly twitched to the side as though some invisible thing were dragging him against his will.

I will take everything. The voice in Obi-Wan’s head was back. I will kill everyone you hold dear.

Not now, Kenobi pleaded with himself. Not in front of Yoda. Don’t let them see me like this.

Obi-Wan wrenched himself free from the all-consuming darkness. He looked at Yoda before raking a shaking hand through his hair.

The Grand Master saw Kenobi’s eyes soften and refocus. “What happened?” he asked soothingly. “A vision did you have?”

Obi-Wan shook his head. “I’m sorry. I seem to be having trouble concentrating.” He sounded genuinely apologetic. “Thoughts seem to sneak up on me in a way I can’t yet control.” Kenobi was disturbed by the idea that he could not completely trust his own mind. He knew he could still control his mental shields, even from Yoda if he wished, but this voice kept creeping in, kept breaking down his defenses, and, most frightening of all, it did not sound like his own voice.

“This is why you may not yet return to the Council. You cannot be privy to Jedi and Senate secrets until you are in full control of your faculties.”

Obi-Wan grimaced, knowing that Yoda was right. “Have you stripped me of my status as a general as well?”

“A general you will remain, but you will not be returning to the front lines.”

Kenobi was disappointed. “Master, please. I need a distraction. I can’t just sit here.”

“Ready you are not,” Yoda said firmly. The Grand Master signaled for Anakin to go back into the kitchen. Skywalker obediently went to finish making tea. Then Yoda leaned in closer to Obi-Wan. “You doubt your place as a Jedi. Considering leaving the Order you are.” Yoda’s suspicions were confirmed when Kenobi’s face gave a slight, angry twitch. “You cannot expect to return to your duties while conflict grows in your heart.”

Obi-Wan could not deny the truth in Yoda’s words. He wanted to go back to his life, pick up where he left off, but deep down he knew he was not himself, he was volatile, and he would never want to put Cody and his men at risk by leading them into combat before he was ready.

He bowed his head, feeling rather ashamed. “Yes, Master,” Kenobi said quietly.

The young Jedi looked not resigned but defeated. Yoda’s heart lurched as he saw the boy Obi-Wan had once been; eager to please, desperate to prove his worth, and so tender hearted that he felt every disappointment deep in his bones.

“Obi-Wan, trust you I still do,” the Grand Master said lifting Kenobi’s chin, refusing to let one of his greatest Jedi submit to devastation. “Care for you I most certainly do. Protect you I will.” The young man met Yoda’s strong gaze. “Give up on you I have not.”

The Jedi shared an unspoken bond: Yoda to Dooku, Dooku to Qui-Gon, Qui-Gon to Obi-Wan. Their lineage was noble and powerful, and though Obi-Wan always knew Yoda would do what the Force demanded, whether or not that meant sacrificing Kenobi for the greater good, at least Obi-Wan knew Yoda cared for him on a more personal level.

“For your own good, promise me that you will do as I instruct.”

“I promise, Master.”

“Good. Together we will heal your connection to the Force.” Yoda returned to his seat as Anakin brought in the tea. “Though you will not be returning to your usual duties, training I have for you. Strictly you will be required to keep to it.”

“Yes, Master.”

“You must take this time to find your center. Meditate for at least one hour, three times a day you will.” Yoda took a careful sip of his hot tea.

Required meditation was no surprise. Though Obi-Wan did not look forward to it, he knew it was the best way to bring order to his chaotic mind. That’s not so bad. I can manage three times a day.

“Meet with me every evening you must.” Yoda suddenly continued. “You are to refrain from any physical training except for morning katas.”

Obi-Wan did not like this stricture; he understood that sparring might increase his aggressive feelings, but he needed an outlet for his pent up frustration. Katas and meditation would hardly quell the fury rushing through his limbs.

Yoda noticed Obi-Wan’s face looked more and more reluctant but he carried on. “You will restrict your diet to only plants, clear liquids, and simple water creatures. You will walk daily with Anakin through the gardens and the Room of a Thousand Fountains. You will rise with the sun and you will sleep when your star cycle crests the evening zenith. You will follow these instructions without deviation or resistance.” The Grand Master knew Kenobi would not like being so regulated, but he also knew the young Jedi would do as he was told.

“Yes, Master.” Obi-Wan was shocked by the severe restrictions. Half of him knew the structure would do him good, but the other half resented being told how to live and care for his own body. It was hardly the kind of training he expected, but the more he thought about it the more he came to realize it was an exercise in control; in order to faithfully maintain this regimen, he would have to be extremely disciplined. Every facet of his daily routine would require focus and restraint. Obi-Wan was not sure he would succeed.

“The day is only half gone,” Yoda said, taking another sip of tea. “Today you must make time to meditate, but the other elements of your training may begin tomorrow.”

Obi-Wan could barely hide his irritation. “As you wish, Master.”

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NEXT CHAPTER: Obi-Wan can't fool Anakin.

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READ IT ON AO3 - Kudos and Comments Welcome :-)

READ CHAPTER 1: Disturbance

READ CHAPTER 2: Waking

READ CHAPTER 3: The Voice

READ CHAPTER 4: The Council’s Lackey

CHAPTER 5: Demons

CHAPTER 6: The Downward Spiral

CHAPTER 7: The Change

CHAPTER 8: Forbidden

CHAPTER 9: The Prophetess

CHAPTER 10: Doubt

CHAPTER 11: The Push

CHAPTER 12: The Fall

CHAPTER 13: The Horrible Truth

CHAPTER 14: The Only Way

CHAPTER 15: Asunder

CHAPTER 16: Master

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