#god i love endverse so much

[bloodydeanwinchester]

1k follower make me choose

—  @transsexualcas: honey cas, endverse cas, or godstiel

[chitaquahq]

Biggest difference between Endverse Dean and Dean is that Endverse Dean might have way more experience living on that universe— but if there is one single weapon on the battlefield, you can bet Dean will find it and use it.

When it comes to the heart of it, Endverse Dean needed a weapon, he needed someone to be his weapon or a physical object, he needed an army because he stopped believing in himself. He was defeated, he wanted to go back in time and give himself to Michael, he put all his faith on the Colt.

In contrast, Dean is a weapon. His actions have repercussions that change the story because he has a choice and that choice matters. He trusted his judgement when he said that there must be another way, one that didn't involve saying yes to Michael. When the Colt failed him, when Sam said yes to Lucifer, Dean went to a battlefield without a weapon. Cas and Bobby only gave him time, so Dean could fall on his knees and talk to his brother until it gave Sam the strength to cage Lucifer.

He did that with words alone.

When Cas met Dean, he thought he had no faith. It isn't quite true, it's just that his faith is not on some god or bug plan. Dean's faith is impossible to escape, it's all consuming and empowering, it's a world on its own. Dean believes in Sam, in Cas, in Bobby. Then he arrived to the Endverse and he deployed that faith in Chitaqua and Ichabod.

Incredibly fucking dangerous because he knows he only need one chance and it'll be over. One slip, one opening: that's how he killed Zachariah. Bring a weapon and he'll find it. Give him the 0.0001% chance of winning and he will.

Compared to Endverse Dean (the end of the road and the lost of purpose), Dean is the embodiment of possibilities. Not because those opportunities are granted to him, but because he'd craft them out of thin air if necessary.

[helltore]

v. ㅤ SAVING PEOPLE‚ HUNTING THINGS. ㅤ ( undetermined. ) v. ㅤ CARRY ON‚ WAYWARD SON. ㅤ ( s1 - s5. ) v. ㅤ SOLDIER BOY‚ COME MARCHING HOME. ㅤ ( child. ) v. ㅤ WHEN I ARRIVE‚ I WON'T KNOW ANYONE. ㅤ ( teen. ) v. ㅤ SOLD MY SOUL TO A THREE-PIECE‚ TOLD ME I WAS HOLY. ㅤ ( pre-series. ) v. ㅤ SO MUCH HISTORY IN MY HEAD. ㅤ ( normal / s2 spinoff. ) v. ㅤ PRAYER FOR THE END OF TIMES. ㅤ ( s5 endverse. ) v. ㅤ CHEMICALS BURN IN MY BLOODSTREAM. ㅤ ( vamp / s6 spinoff. ) v. ㅤ A RELEVATION‚ SOME KIND OF RESOLUTION.ㅤ ( au / s12 spinoff. ) v. ㅤ GOD IN A LOVER WHOSE LOVE IS SACRIFICE.ㅤ ( modern / myth au. )

[dean-winchester-is-a-warrior]

The Dangers of Hope Ch. 4

Series Summary: When Y/N shows up at Camp Chitaqua with her little girl in tow, her bloodshot eyes leave no doubt that she's infected. Or is she? Everything Dean has come to know for certain over the last five hellish years, is about to be challenged.

Pairings/Characters in the series: Endverse!Dean x Reader, Emma (OFC), Castiel, Sam Winchester, Lucifer, Michael, Zachariah, Risa, Johnston (OMC), Patrick (OMC), Theresa (OFC), other survivors and soldiers.

Series Explicit 18 +/Warnings: Show level violence, some gore, angst, smut, fluff all the usual for a series of mine. ❤️ Endverse!Dean (that's a warning for his anger and callousness as well as his extreme hotness. 😁) Each chapter will have their own specific warnings.

Chapter Warnings: Nothing major. But - nudity! 😉

Word Count: 4,328

A/N: So, I've had this idea for quite a while. Basically since I watched The Last of Us. I loved Pedro in the role of Joel, but I kept thinking how incredible Jensen would have been. Which then made me think of how amazing he was as Endverse!Dean which then led me to this idea. Lol! I've stolen the premise of Ellie's storyline from TLOU, but made her a grown up, a reader insert, and a love interest for Dean.

If you've never seen TLOU, don't worry - you don't need to have seen it to understand this story. 😊

I've taken some liberties with the Endverse in my story, changed a few things from canon, but kept lots of things too.

I sincerely hope you enjoy the story. It will be ten chapters and I will do my very best to post one chapter every weekend. ❤️

A/N 2: So, here I am with chapter 4. I hope you enjoy it! Thank you so much for all the very kind comments that this series has received so far. You're all fabulous.

Series Master List || Map of Camp || Tag Lists

The dividers below were created by @saradika

Y/N woke with a start. She was breathing fast, her heart pounding. The sense of fear and worry that had lived trapped inside her chest for months lifted quickly as she looked down to see Emma laying beside her on the narrow cot, having migrated there from her own bed sometime in the night.

Y/N resettled herself so she could pull her daughter’s warm little body closer to her, tucking the gray, wool blanket tighter around Emma’s shoulders to protect her from the cool September morning. She looked at Emma’s pale face, the bones a little too prominent, and was grateful once again to be where they were.

They’d been traveling around, nomadic and scrounging for whatever food they could find, for months. They’d spent a week in an abandoned church one time, a few days in an old hunting cabin. If they were lucky they sometimes found a camp of other survivors who would allow them to stay for a day or two. But the people would inevitably shuffle them along quickly, not willing to divvy up their resources amongst two more people.

When they’d found the Billings camp, she’d been so happy. They’d taken them in without much issue, but she’d soon discovered why. The camp had been made up of somewhat fanatical people, calling themselves Christians, who believed the apocalypse happened because people had turned away from the church. So while they did feel it was their duty to help Y/N and Emma, unfortunately they also felt it was their duty to bring them to the light. They’d spent most of the month they’d lived there praying and listening to the leaders call upon God to cast away the evil.

If the Croat attack hadn’t happened, Y/N knew she probably wouldn’t have stayed much longer anyway. She’d heard people talking about this camp, Camp Chitaqua, saying that it had a good leader, a man named Dean Winchester, and she’d wondered whether it could be the same man who’d saved her all those years ago.

She sighed deeply now, breathing in the fresh scent of the pine trees around them, giving thanks again that they’d made it here, and that, despite all odds, she was still alive. Even more miraculously, she was still herself. For a while, she’d been secretly worried that she’d only managed to stave off the virus in the same way that mothers could sometimes lift a car off of their child, by sheer power of will and desperation as mothers. But Emma had been here, and safe, for a week now, and she still felt exactly the same. 

She couldn’t explain it, but she was trying not to question her good fortune. They were in a well-run camp, complete with guards, supplies, and a leader who, whatever he might claim, cared a lot about the welfare of the people in his care. She wasn’t about to look a gift horse in the mouth.

After Emma woke up, Y/N cooked them their oatmeal ration for the morning, gave them both basin baths, and braided Emma’s hair. As she was tying the last ribbon, two small voices were calling for Emma from outside the tent. When they went to look, there were two little girls, Keisha and Julianne, looking for Emma to come out and play. 

Their mom, Monique gave Y/N a warm smile as she shook her hand. If Y/N’s bloodshot eyes worried the woman at all, she didn’t show it. 

“We’ve heard a lot about you from Emma.” Monique said as the girls ran about, giggling and chattering all at the same time. “She spent a lot of time with us over this last week. We’re so glad to see you’ve recovered.”

Y/N was eternally grateful that Monique didn’t ask questions for which she had no answers. They spoke for a few minutes about their children, and Y/N mentioned her intentions to start a school. Monique’s eyes lit up.

“It won’t be much,” Y/N warned, “but I thought the kids could use something.” 

They talked for a little while longer and then Monique requested Emma’s presence for the morning. Keisha and Julianne were looking for their favorite playmate. Y/N sent Emma along with a tight hug and a tug on one of her braids. 

There was a small part of her overextended protectiveness that worried any time Emma wasn’t right next to her. But she knew how important it was that her little one got the chance to play, so she kept her worries to herself and waved her off to have fun, with thanks to Monique for watching her.

She spent the next couple of hours wandering around the camp. She learned the layout of everything, where the medical tent was, where they went to get their food rations for the week. While she was there, she finally got to meet Theresa’s mother, Brandy. She was a big barrel of a woman with russet-colored skin, long dark hair pulled back into a tight bun, big strong hands, and kind brown eyes.

She explained how the ration system worked, and explained that she worked with “The Boss” and “The Angel” to make sure everyone got their fair share, and that absolutely no food was going to waste.

Y/N’s forehead crinkled at that. “Angel?” 

Brandy nodded. “Castiel.”

Y/N’s eyes widened. “He’s an angel?” She quietly berated herself for not figuring out that someone with a name like “Castiel” was an angel. 

Brandy nodded again, and then spoke quietly. “But he doesn’t have any angel mojo. No wings or halo, or whatever.” She shrugged. “That’s what I heard anyway.”

Y/N chatted with Brandy a bit longer, offering up her idea for the school. The older woman was intrigued with the idea and gave some suggestions for where they could hold their classes. She scoffed at the idea of holding them outside. 

“Gonna be winter soon and the wind can be really wicked around here. I’ll talk to The Boss about giving you one of those sheds at the Northeast edge of camp, behind the main cabin. They built them new there this summer for storage - for tools, and supplies like propane and such. But one shed will do for the winter, and they can build a second one for storage in the spring if they need it.” She said decisively.

“Well, please, don’t bug Dean too much about space.” Y/N cautioned. “He was reluctant enough to say yes to the school existing at all. I don’t want to make him doubt his decision.”

But Brandy just waved away the worry. “The Boss is hard, but he knows a good idea when he hears it.”

After a few more minutes of chatting Y/N gave Theresa a squeeze goodbye and headed back to her tent. She was excited to start putting some ideas together for lessons. She’d have to be a bit creative since there probably wasn’t a lot in the way of school supplies available. But she loved a challenge.

She was working at the little table in her tent when she heard a familiar throat clearing before Dean’s voice called out her name.

“Hi!” She called back. “Come in!”

Dean pushed through the tent flap, and walked in, a big green duffle bag in his hand. The height of the tent was just barely tall enough to accommodate him; it brushed against his spiky hair as he walked towards her, and Y/N had to smile.

Their tent home had seemed spacious when they’d arrived in it the other day. There was room enough for two narrow cots, a table and two chairs, a small wooden box for clothes and other supplies, and a little metal camping stove that was vented to the outside through a hole in the roof of the heavy canvas tent. She assumed that was for when it got really cold, and they couldn’t survive without some heat through the night.

It met all their needs and she’d been impressed by its size, having felt lucky enough to get the little two-person pup tent they’d had when they were at the Billings camp. But now, with Dean inside, the space felt much smaller. He seemed to take up most of the room in the tent, and he kept his neck bent forward slightly to avoid brushing against the top again.

“So, the river?” He asked, thumbing behind him. 

Y/N nodded enthusiastically. “Oh, yes. That would be fabulous.” She grabbed her clean clothes and followed him out of the tent. She asked him to wait for a moment and dashed over to Monique’s to get Emma. But the three little girls didn’t want to stop playing, so Monique offered to take Emma with them in a couple of days when she took the girls down to the river.

“Okay.” Y/N gave in to her daughter’s pleading eyes and the three little girls squealed and jumped around. 

Y/N was thrilled to see Emma having so much fun, and she couldn’t justify derailing that fun just for a bath. But she made Monique promise to let her watch the girls for an afternoon very soon as payback, and she hurried back to where Dean waited, somewhat impatiently, by her tent.

His face held a deep scowl. “Are we good?” He asked.

Y/N nodded and he turned away, obviously expecting Y/N would follow. Once again she found herself walking quickly to try and keep up with his long-limbed, brisk pace. They went east towards the medical tent. But before they got to the tent, they reached a wide, open area where five vehicles were parked. Four of the vehicles, two trucks, a Jeep and a van, sat in a three sided aluminum building. Inside the building two men and a woman were working on one of the trucks, a black Ford F-150.

Dean nodded in their direction as he entered, and they lifted their hands in a salute before returning to their work. He walked towards the Jeep, but Y/N had her attention snagged by the car that sat outside the shed, towards the back, almost behind the building. The tires were flat and vegetation grew all around it. The front windshield had a big crack in it, and both bumpers were missing. Rust covered the tire rims and the bottom of the passenger side door. 

But she still recognized it. She still remembered the way the sleek, black beauty had shined as it pulled into their driveway so long ago. She remembered the way her dad had whistled when he saw it and the way both Dean and John had beamed with pride when he told them, “That is an American classic right there!” 

She walked towards it, and her heart was sad to see it so beaten up and neglected. Dean followed her around the side of the building. “What are you doing?” He asked angrily.

She looked back at him. “I remember her. What a shame.” 

Dean’s jaw ticked and he grabbed her wrist to yank her back into the building. “Just a car, it wasn’t practical. Now, come on, you wanna a bath, or what? I don’t have all damn day here.”

Y/N kept her mouth shut as she climbed into the Jeep, flinching slightly when Dean slammed his door; she’d obviously hit a nerve. In deference to that fact she stayed quiet for a little while. But eventually, she risked starting a conversation.

“How far is it to walk out to the river?” She asked.

He shrugged. “‘Bout an hour or so.”

“How long will it take us?”

“Five or six minutes.”

She smiled. “Well, then I really appreciate the ride.”

He shrugged again. “Sooner we're there, the sooner we’re done.”

“I also appreciate you taking the time out of your day.”

He just grunted in response and she wasn’t sure exactly how to interpret the sound. Whether it meant, It’s fine, or I’m regretting the offer, she wasn’t sure, but she plowed on anyway.

“I can only imagine how busy you must be, running a camp this size. How many people live here?”

“Don’t know exactly.” He answered and she thought that might be the only answer he was going to give, but then he continued. “Somewhere between a hundred and a hundred and fifty, I’d guess.”

“Wow!” Y/N said, truly impressed. “Billings only had about 60, and they were the biggest group I’d ever seen.”

Dean didn’t respond as the Jeep jolted over a big rut in the uneven path they were driving down. Trees scraped against the sides of the Jeep as they passed, and Y/N almost bounced out of her seat as they hit another deep rut. 

“Put your fucking seatbelt on.” He barked at her. “You tryna fly through the windshield?”

Y/N grabbed the strap and clicked it in place. Then she frowned at him. “You’re not wearing your seatbelt.”

“Do as I say, not as I do.�� He warned her.

She snorted. “That’s crap advice.” He scowled at her but said nothing more.

They were silent until they emerged from the trees onto a wide river bank and Y/N could see a sparkling river laid out in front of them. She gasped.

“It’s beautiful.” 

Dean threw the Jeep into park and turned off the engine. “It’s advantageous.” He admitted as he climbed out, pulling his duffel bag out with him.

Y/N jumped down and walked quickly towards the river, already itching to feel the water wash away the layer of grime she could feel sitting on her skin. When they reached the side of the river, they stood for a minute. Y/N looked over at Dean, waiting for some privacy before she took off her clothes and jumped into the river.

Instead he nodded towards it, and warned her. “Don’t go too far east. The current here is slower, but it picks up around the bend up there, and it can be hard to stand.” 

He dropped the bag on the ground, reaching in and grabbing a bar of soap and tossing it to her. It wasn’t new, but it smelled fresh and zesty, so she didn’t care that it had been used previously. 

She stood still, holding the soap, making no move to get into the water. Dean looked at her, annoyed again. “Are you going in or not?”

She knew she was blushing and she felt ridiculous for it. But she waved towards him. “Could you turn around or something?”

Dean rolled his eyes. “No, actually, I can’t. There’s a reason no one ever comes to the river alone. We’re almost five miles from camp, there could be wild animals, rogue Croats, or desperate men around.” He folded his arms across his chest. “Someone needs to stand watch.”

Y/N nodded, accepting that logic. But she still didn’t want to get naked with him watching. When she continued to hesitate, Dean gave a huge huff and shook his head. 

“Oh for fuck’s sake. Even though you definitely don’t have anything I haven’t seen before, if it will make you hurry up and get in the fucking water, I’ll turn my head while you strip down. Just tell me when you’re covered up in the water, so I can go back to making sure nothing tries to eat you.”

With that, he turned his head away from her and sighed again, before holding up his finger. “And be careful - the deeper the water, the faster the current.”

She shucked her old grubby clothes quickly, practically moaning about how good it was going to feel to be clean and then actually step into clean clothes. She ran into the river, squeaking slightly as the cold water hit her skin.

“Whoo! It’s freezing!” She said with a slightly manic giggle. But she kept walking until the water covered her breasts. “Okay.” She called out over the rushing of the river. It was a little hard to keep her balance as she began washing, but she managed.

She tried to ignore Dean standing barely twenty feet away as she washed her body quickly and then dipped her head back in the water, lathering up her hands to scrub through her hair and across her scalp. As she rinsed her hair out she couldn’t take the silence anymore and started talking as a distraction, like she usually did. 

“So you guys keep chickens? I’m assuming that’s where the eggs come from?”

Dean nodded. “And one young cow. We found her in the spring. Her mother was nowhere to be seen. So we brought her back to camp. The kids in the camp take it in turns to spend the day gathering grass for her to eat. They pull up buckets of it every day to fill her trough. In return she gives us fertilizer for the crops, and if we can somehow find her a bull next spring she’ll give us milk and more cows too.”

Y/N smiled as she finished her bath, and then ran her hands down her leg to rinse away the last of the soap. “How is it you can manage -”

Y/N stopped talking to let out a scream as her fingers brushed against something slimy on her leg. And then screamed even louder when it brushed over a second one. Before she could let out a third scream, Dean was in the water, having shed everything but his jeans and white t-shirt on the way.

“What’s wrong!” He was yelling as he barreled towards her. 

“Something.” She pointed at her leg. “Something’s biting me. Something slimy.”

Dean looked relieved and then annoyed. “For pete’s sake, it’s probably just leeches.”

Y/N stared at him like he was completely insane. “Just. leeches?” She shrieked. “Get them off.”

Dean grabbed her hand and started to pull her out of the water. But she wrapped her other arm over her breasts and dug her heels into the rocky bed of the river. “No, I can’t leave the water. I’m naked.”

Dean spun around to face her. “Are you fucking kidding me?” He dropped her hand and threw up his arms. “You wanna stay in the water with the leeches?”

“Can’t you just pull them off while we’re in the water?”

“No.” Dean said shortly. “I can’t. I have to pry them off gently, meaning I have to be able to see them properly. You may also have leeches other places than just your leg. I need to check you.”

Y/N’s face turned blazing hot, but she decided she was more horrified by the slimy things sucking her blood than by Dean getting up close and personal. So she followed him out of the water to stand on the sandy bank. He walked back to his duffel bag and grabbed a knife. She covered herself with her arms and hands the best she could.

Dean came close and got down on his haunches to work at unsticking the leeches from her thigh. His fingers were warm on her chilled skin, and she knew it wasn’t only the cold breeze that was giving her goosebumps. She peered down at him, admiring the way his long lashes swept downwards as he focused on his task. His white t-shirt was wet and clung to him, outlining the muscles in his back that shifted slightly as he worked.

Thoroughly distracted she didn’t notice the leeches pop off until Dean tossed them back into the river. “K, I’m gonna check for other ones.”

Y/N’s whole body flushed as Dean walked around behind her, scanning all of her looking for more of the parasites. He came around to her right side where her arm was folded over her chest. 

“Lift your arm.” He ordered. “They like the soft skin under here.”

With a sigh, Y/N shifted her other arm over her breasts, while crossing her legs to make up for the hand that was no longer covering her below. Then she lifted her right arm and Dean clicked his tongue. 

“Yeah, there’s one more here.”

He brought his knife up again, and Y/N tried not to think about the way she could feel Dean’s breath move across the tops of her breast as he pried off the disgusting creature. When it popped off, Dean threw it back into the river and let his other hand trail down to her waist, leaving a fiery trail in his wake. 

He moved to the other side and checked too but thankfully there were no more on that side.

Dean waved towards the parts of her that she had covered up. “Do you want to check the rest, just in case?”

He turned his head without being asked and Y/N was grateful as she searched her skin. 

“There’s nothing.” She said with relief.

Dean nodded. “Good. Hang on.”

He walked over to his duffel bag and pulled out a towel, also grabbing her clothes that sat beside his bag. He tossed them all to her and then turned away so she could dry herself off and get dressed. She dried quickly, but as she started to pull on her jeans, Dean pulled his wet t-shirt over his head, and pushed off his jeans, treating her to the truly disarming sight of his beautiful bare torso and round, plump ass. His back was bronzed and tan while the fleshy skin of his backside was milky white. 

He must have worked outside without a shirt on a lot this summer. 

That image left her brain spiraling, and while she was melting into a puddle, Dean pulled a pair of jeans out of his duffle bag and put them on, before slipping his long, muscular arms through the sleeves of his flannel shirt.

He stood quietly for a moment after he was dressed before he called to her without turning around. “Are you dressed?”

Shaking her head like a wet dog, Y/N answered quickly. “Not yet, just give me a minute.”

“Already had a minute.” Dean mumbled.

Y/N hopped into the jeans; they were a size smaller than she normally wore, so they fit a bit snug. She put on the bra that was also a bit too small in the cups, but she wasn’t about to complain about the free, clean clothes, so she just tugged on the t-shirt.

She could practically feel Dean’s impatience as he stood there with his hands on his hips. “I’m finished.” She told him and he finally spun around to face her, his expression annoyed as usual.

He started to say something, but when he caught sight of her, the words seemed to die on his lips. He scanned her from head to toe and Y/N felt her cheeks flame. It was silent between them, but something crackled in the air, hot and vibrant. 

Dean took a step closer, and her eyes wandered over his flannel shirt and the way the open sides framed his tanned, broad chest and flat abdomen. She looked at his belly button and the light trail of hair that disappeared into his jeans and she had the sudden urge to lick him, dip her tongue into his belly button, and then…

“Clothes good?” Dean asked, his voice soft and deep.

It took Y/N a solid ten to twenty seconds to figure out what he was talking about. Finally she nodded. “Oh yeah,” she ran a hand over her skin tight jeans, “they’re great.”

“Good.” Dean cleared his throat and nodded his head sideways towards the Jeep. “We should get back.”

The ride back to camp was tense as suddenly Y/N was aware of every move Dean made. She watched his hands on the big Jeep steering wheel and became immediately distracted by them. They moved smoothly, but she remembered the calluses she could feel when he grabbed her wrist, and it made her want to feel them again, feel them in more sensitive places.

The five minute ride felt twice as long on the way back.

When they reached the garage, Y/N practically leapt from the Jeep before it had even stopped fully.

“Well, thanks.” She said in a high pitched, squeaky voice. 

Dean followed her silently out of the Jeep and out of the building. When she started back across the camp to her tent though, he called her back.

“Y/N!” She turned around but kept some distance between them. She was honestly afraid of what her addled mind might try if she got too close to him. 

Unfortunately, Dean didn’t seem to be suffering from the same problem because he walked right up to her, leaving barely a foot between them.

“Just keep an eye on the bites. Leech bites aren’t usually dangerous, but the itch can be a real pain in the ass. If they get bad, you can go to the medical tent.” She followed his finger as he pointed at the big white tent to her right. “They'll probably have something for you.”

She turned back to face him and her breath caught in her throat. He was so close, and he smelled so good, like gunpowder, fire and something a bit warmer, softer, that she couldn’t place. She stared up into his intense green eyes and her stomach started doing somersaults. 

His gaze fell to her lips and for one insane moment, Y/N thought he was going to lean forward and kiss her. But he took a step back, nodded and then turned on his heel and walked away. Y/N stood staring after him for a lot longer than she had any reason to, holding her breath the whole time.

As he disappeared into the main cabin, she exhaled slowly, finally able to admit to herself that she was incredibly disappointed by the kiss that didn’t happen.

Jensen RPF and Any/All Characters:

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[fatallyaddictedtofiction]

Im just gonna allow myself to yap about supernatural and see where destiny takes me. SIDENOTE IF U WANNA TALK ABOUT THIS WITH ME LITERALLY PLEASE I WANT TO PLEASE INTERACT WITH ME.

Okay first of all im starting with the start (s1+2). BEST LIGHTING TO MOOD EVER EVER EVER. Like you want dark scary monsters??? ITS THERE. I remember there being a reason they changed the lighting (smugly: yes i listen to the podcast) but i CANT REMEMBER. The characterisation of the macho eldest son coded scared eldest daughter Dean is unreal and parallel in epicness to repressed queer allegory something is inherently wrong with him little brother. The brief moments of emotional vulnerability. Dont get me STARTED on Dean's monologue in the s2 finale i'll start crying. It's crazy how rude john is to Dean like excuse me he raised your kid and now ur bitching about him? Try saying thank you for once. I think the only reason john actually said im proud of you was because he realised when azazel said it dean was like "ur not my dad" and to john it was a little "oh shit" moment. Sam has every right to be angry but every time he gets angry at dean something in me shatters a little because deans trying so hard for himself and sam and sam doesnt know who or how to lash out (emotional dysregulation baybee) so aims for deans jugular like nooo honeyyyy noooooo. This era was the best sam in my opinion.

Rest of the show down here:

Onto S3-5. Cant remember jack about season 3. Season 4 CASTIEL MY BELOVED MY LIGHT MY LIFE MY REASON FOR LIVING. Absolutely loved everything about Weird Cas and i wanted more of him why did they have to domesticate him. His and Deans dynamic was impeccable and yk something??? I wanted to see Dean in hell torturing people i wanted to see it on his face how much he hated that he enjoyed it and i wanted to see Cas' face at watching the righteous man lose. Like the best we got was Yellow Fever GOD I LOVED THAT bit when he was hallucinating the book and it said "you gonna cry?" Like so many people think thats a funny episode but it makes me so sad because he is DYING and from such a young age hes been told to stow it away, lock it down to the point hes HALLUCINATING IT. Cas falling for dean. Im sorry i just. They are the best love story. LUCIFER. He was scarier back then, but i do love later seasons lucy too. Something about the peeling skin and the "we will always end up right here" just slapped. ENDVERSE EPSIODE god so good can we just take a moment to think about it. Okay cool thanks okay. Demon blood Sam arc was fun but had unfulfilled potential. Cant give you specifcs rn its late and my brain needs to get this all out so if you know you know. The whole meta stuff with Chuck was eh until he was confirmed as god and then i was like duuude the faint strings of marionettes are glistening in the sunrise like how do we know --- im getting ahead of myself.

S6-11. I know, its a big chunk. But basically the whole thing could be renamed "Crowley's unrequited love story". Cas and crowley were the best duo i almost forgot like they are genuinely so funny together and i bet it would be great to be tortured by them UMM THE BETRAYAL i honestly loved Cas' episode the only thing i didn't like was how the reveal itself was done like... Idk just a bit... Kryptonite???? Anywho i Loved the tension between Dean and Cas DEAN LOOKED BACK. Um leviathans were my favourite monster but they became so dumbbbb after washing up liquid killed them. BOBBYS EPISODE ALWAYS MAKES ME SOB MY EYES OUT "i raised two boys and they became heroes" allow me to DIE. Also damn impressed a shot to the head didnt take him down but it was lovely to see Deans first world, first solid rock properly crumble around him (forgetting john okay he wasnt a healthy rock) . PURGATORY DEAN JDJSJDJDJD kill me please his fight or flight mode was SO. So sad we didnt get more of purgatory like i would pay to see more i would kill probably but we'll overlook that. Benny my beloved. They definitely all got together Cas included like who wouldnt at that point. Smth i didnt like is how wheneer they went back to purgatory, unlike how dean described it "360 battle 24/7" or some shit like that it was EMPTY. Like please,, i know the plot needs convenience BUT PURGATORY ISNT SUPPOSED TO BE CONVENIENT. But dean recrafting his own memories to make himself believe that he failed to save Cas rather than what he perceived as Cas giving up on him- hang on i dropped my jaw somewhere, gimme a sec i need to go find it-- LIKE. HHHH. The whole mind control shit going on with Cas because his ties to Dean had been severed (saw a post about that and loved it but cant rmb it) and HIM BEING THE ONE TO BREAK IT. The crypt scene mmmm i love. Want more. Mark of Cain dean was literally my favourite. A violent, mentally unstable man who also has bad mental health and is often covered in blood? Yes pls. Cas being with him every step of the way. I havent mentioned Sam in a while. Hes just kind of been there. Hate that he slowly became 2D. Far away in the background hes got his worried expression and is rocking, saying "Dean? Dean? Cas? Jack? Dean?" Like writers why did u strip his personality except for worry. Do Not get me started on the whole Amelia thing ill stab someone. But yeah cas saying he'll watch dean murder the world is my universe :). If someone said that to me id say "omg really?" And develop a huge fat crush (somehow). CHARLIE DYING WAS AN ABOMINATION When they brought back Eileen why not charlie like. Dont bring characters back at this point because theres all sorts of issues grr. Amara was cool af but i didnt like the whole amara x dean stuff because it was just weird. Luciferrrrr hes so girlypop i love him DEAN DIDNT KNOW IT WASNT CAS but thats only because lucy purposefully wore less clothes around him to distract him.

S12-14. Im running out of steam. MARYYY. It hurt to see Sam get along with Mary becsuse he never knew her as anything else while all dean wanted was a mom and that wasnt who she really was anymore. He loved her so much but couldnt break through that barrier of "it wasnt the perfect marriage until after she died" vibes. God that scene in s5 where its suggested dean saw +/ smelled what happened to Mary and he was literally backing himself into a corner BROKE me. Havent mentioned the Wayward sisters but please know they are so important to me they are my everything. Jack is also. Loved Kelly, very sad she had to die. Wanted Jack to be a baby but thats not good for television is it. But i love Jack so much hes such a sweetie who can kill with a thought. Alternate universe michael and Michael!Dean was epic af but michael dying like that was so anticlimactic gonna be honest i think they were just reaching for ways to lose Jacks soul. Garth GARTH!!! Hes so cute. I loved all those "hand recorded" episodes btw like ghostfacers and that one teen wolf type stuff. Dean hiding in his room is so me. Free Will Theory is so fucked up at this point ur sat there saying gods been pulling the strings this whole time and i supposed to be okay with it?? I so get why deans angry but i definitely think thats something Chuck emphasised (crappy excuse for crappy writing) to an extreme level because WHAT. Like dude. I cant even describe how out of character he felt at some times.

S15. Currently rewatching and cant rmb much of it. 3 characters dead in the first 3 episodes. They either kill off all side characters or we dont hear from them at all to tie up or shove away loose ends. I cant even talk abiut the finale please i cant rn im way too tired. It straight up didnt need to exist, it could've only been 19 eps. Cas. Castiel. He did want you my darling.

[hawkland]

Art Masterpost: The Beginning Story by emmbrancsxx0 (@valleydean) Art by sidewinder (@hawkland)

When I saw an endverse story up for claims in this year's @deancashorrorfest — particularly one exploring the beginnings of how it all came to be — I knew I had to get my grubby, greedy hands on it. When I found out it was written by none other than @valleydean, I may have made some hqppy screeching noises to rival Castiel's true voice. Getting to do art for one of my favorite writers is always exciting, if sometimes anxiety-inducing, but I ended up having an absolute blast working on these with Mallory and am really happy with how they turned out. Thank you for being such an amazing partner to work with, and I'm so excited for everyone else getting to read the story now!

Thank you as well to @kingdumbass for organizing Horrorfest once again, and creating one of my favorite little Destiel communities on the net. It's always a ton of fun and I love how you keep the server going & engaging year round.

Some rambling comments on the art & my process below the cut.

As usual these were all done in watercolor with a little bit of black & white acrylic pen work for fine details and lines. I used rough/cold press paper for all of these to keep a consistent feeling and because it's always my favorite for doing any portraits and where I want a lot of blending control.

The hardest thing for me was deciding which of the many memorable scenes and moments I wanted to illustrate in the time I had available. I had a pretty clear vision for the title art early on: to show Dean & Cas at the beginning of it all, with a collage of elements of destruction behind them and doing the title text in the "Croatoan graffiti" style. There were a bunch of different reference shots combined for that one: screencaps from 5x04, a later-season shot of Dean & Cas walking together to get their positions how I wanted, etc. My Cas "face" reference was actually from Stonehenge Apocalypse as I wanted him looking a little more human/hopeful than standard s4-5 Cas as he's pretty low on grace but still has a little "angel mojo" left.

(As Mallory commented when I shared it as a WIP, "That's a man who's about to be destroyed!" :D D:)

I'm also really glad I was able to get the painting to Mallory at DC-Con! You can see in the pic that it's pretty big (16"x20") to get all that detail in!

For the next piece, there's a small scene of Dean and Cas on the road under smoke-filled skies, past a "God Saves" billboard that just struck me. I'd just driven out to Pittsburgh and back on the PA Turnpike so used some quick reference snaps I took combined with photos of the hazy skies from the Canadian wildfires earlier this year to get the atmosphere I wanted. I tried to keep some of the same washed-out colors and feeling of the title piece for that, save the color of the sky.

For the rest, I wanted to do one piece each of Cas and Dean at critical moments in their journey through the story. Cas facing himself in the shattered glass of a pharmacy cabinet was a moment I knew I had to try to capture. It reminded me of that amazing shot of Misha in Gotham Knights, with Harvey and the smashed mirror, so that was definitely in my mind as a visual reference.

Cas himself is a combination of some Purgatory screencaps and some out-of-character Misha pics from here and there to get his hair the way I wanted it to look (even if I ended up painting over most of it with interference silver watercolor to create the effect of the shattered glass. Here's an in-progress look:

The Dean rooftop piece is one I'd had in my head as soon as I read the passage in the story, but it was the last piece I tackled. The city in flames behind Dean was pretty much done in one shot as a spontaneous wet-in-wet wash...though it was a little eerie and unsettling working on it this past week with current events playing out on the tv while I painted.

Finally, I really wanted to do a piece showing Dean and Cas as they are near the end of the story compared to how they started out. This one came together in a really fast burst of inspiration - I think one day drawing and two days painting because it's smaller than the others (12"x6") and I wanted it to be really close up and intimate. Drawing:

Poor boys have been through a lot. And it's only going to get worse )-:

Anyway, that's more than enough from me. Have you gone to start reading the story yet? If not, go there now! Bookmark! Read! Leave lots of love in the comments! Reblog and check out the rest of this year's Horrorfest collection while you're there!

[famousbread101]

riptides

sharkfish

Words 138,635

“I’m going to kiss you now.”

Cas pauses, giving Dean a chance to back out, but Dean just licks his lips and waits.

Loonngg fic. Almost pure (BDSM) porn but the love story that you read between the lines is my absolute favorite thing. Castiel is pretty much Endverse!Cas in this story and god am I obssed with it. Dean falling for the hedonist man he met in a bar and Castiel who never thought he would love falling for the 'straight' man he picked up???? Amazing.

Smut, drugs, impact play, and breath play all involved in this one so please use discretion.

Rate 10/10

Too many amazing lines to pick a favorite sadly. But if I come across one on my monthly reread ill edit.

[spnfanficpond]

April 2024 Angel Fish Awards

(Angel Fish design by @slytherkins!!)

Every month all of you fantastic writers work your asses off to post some truly incredible stories. Our Angel Fish Awards are the way for all of us, as a community of writers and readers, to lift each other up and give praise to those who have captured our attention and deserve a few kind words. (Click here to learn more about how to nominate a fic for an award!)

Nominated by @charliethealpaccaso

Contentment Is A Pearl Of Great Price by ravelqueen (AO3)

This fic captures everything that makes transformation scary but fascinating to read from start to finish. The mental change later on during the fic, Sam has to deal with as the new part of him takes over. It leaves you on the edge of your seat as we have no idea if he will ever be human again or if he will lose himself and his humanity forever. I wish more people would try their hands at more transformation fics, as there are many interesting topics to choose from when creating a fic like this one.

~*~*~

Nominated by @thoughtslikeaminefield

God Save The Queen, And Her Handmaids by darali_starscream (AO3)

I have attempted to think up a scenario in which Charlie Bradbury might sit on Dean Winchester's face to no avail. This isn't what you think, I promise—there is no universe in which I'd be OK with a true Charlie/Dean pairing, but this works and it works well. BJ riffs on the spectrum of attraction and sexuality here. The pairing in Charlie and her girlfriend who is bisexual x Dean, and it's a very satisfying little story.

Sleeping Arrangements by @jinkieswouldyoulookatthis

This is very cute and even sexy without being smutty.

~*~*~

Nominated by @zepskies

The Dangers of Hope by @dean-winchester-is-a-warrior

I had never read an "Endverse!Dean Winchester" series before, but this one completely blew me away -- from world-building to the overarching story to the romance itself. Beginning to end, it's beautifully written.

~*~*~

Nominated by @mrswhozeewhatsis

Living His Gray Flannel Life by @samanddean76

Warnings to start - As there is prostitution in this one, noncon must be mentioned. Also, this is a Wincest fic, so, you know, incest. That being said, this story is told from Jimmy's POV, so the Wincest of it all is less Wincesty. Which is right up my alley, man! This is the perfect amount of Wincest combined with outsider POV, where the outsider loves what he's seeing as much as we do. I can't say more for spoilery reasons, but know that there is delicious pining, sweet smutty smut, a fascinating monster, and fantastic side characters. I read it twice just because once wasn't enough!!

~*~*~

Nominated by @salt-n-burn-em-all

House Song by @accordingtothelore

Dean protects Sam from being killed by other Hunters and their dad. Starts Gen, does not stay that way. I just loved everything about it. Fabulous art in the last chapter.

~*~*~

Nominated by @spn-fanfic-reblog-writes

What happens in ApocalypseWorld… by masoena (AO3)

This is such an interesting aspect that I’ve never read for a/b/o. **SPOILERS** The moment Dean and Arthur step through the portal everything changes and the world heavily influences their biology. I loved how, of course, Ketch knew exactly what was happening, which really makes me wonder about wtf Ketch has been through. I really wanna know more about that dynamic change and I hope they really do write more. This is also one of the few stories I get to read a soft!Ketch. I love, love soft!Ketch. Gotta check them out.

Second Chances by @mayalaen

First, I am not a fan of incest. Second, I was really surprised how much I enjoyed this because it isn’t tagged. Finally, I love poly fics. It’s so hard to find a poly fic that isn’t just PWP/smut. I really enjoy how the premise is getting Sam to relax and teach him how to handle his health while managing school work in a healthy way. I really like how the relationship between Cas and Sam is setup, Dean gets introduced, and then all hell breaks loose in the different relationship dynamics. The thing is there isn’t an emphasis on their brotherhood and sex. This is NOT a wincest smut story. It’s a story about Sam learning how to be a healthy adult while finishing college and finds a place where he is wanted and feels like he belongs. I also absolutely love the dom/sub and domestic discipline aspects of Cas and Dean’s relationship. It’s really a background aspect until it isn’t. I highly recommend the read even if you aren’t a wincest or wincestiel fan. The plot is written and integrated so well with the character development for all three main characters. It really took me by surprise. I couldn’t put it down.

(Divider by @glygriffe)

THANK YOU ALL, KEEP UP THE AMAZING WORK, AND AS ALWAYS, HAPPY WRITING!

- From your Admins and Manta Rays, @manawhaat, @mrswhozeewhatsis, @mariekoukie6661, @thoughtslikeaminefield, and @heavenssexiestangel!

[artymcart]

SUPTOBER 2022

Day Twelve // Crossover

"Uhm, hi, my name is Dean Winchester and I think to believe you summoned my husband. I want him back, now."

Big hazel eyes stared at the man in the door.

"BUFFY!"

------

"I'm so sorry!" Buffy Summers was small. That was the first thing Dean thought as the woman came running to her friend, close followed by, thank god, Cas.

Now after everyone calmed down and it was clear that no one was hurting anyone, they sat in the big comfy living room of the Smmers household.

"It's just, we have to deal with so much stuff right now. First it was close to the end of the world and someone was dying, again, and came back and then Hell wanted to reign earth and I think we actually won that but then-"

"What Buffy wants to say," Giles interrupted the rambling Slayer, "is, that we are a bit lost with the rifts and new monsters. They're not noted in any archive's or books I've read so far. We know about Apocalypse...s but this is completely new."

Dean looked at Sam, who looked at Giles as if he found the new love of his life.

Eileen just rolled her eyes as Dean signed her just a question mark.

"We thought, if it's not a Hell problem, it's a Heaven one. And after some research we found an angel that is known to be nice to humans-"

"Which is the angel Castiel, said the scripture!" Buffy shrugged with her shoulders, as she looked over to the group of people.

Cas chuckled at Buffy's words. Even in a totally different universe, he was still the one breaking the rules.

"I'm sorry I can't help you. No wings, no halo," he gave them a crooked smile "but I guess we can help you with everything you want to know."

Sam was never in his life faster then the second Giles gave them a short "Go ahead".

"So, get this-"

----

At night Cas laid wide awake. Dean at his side snoring and deep asleep. It shouldn't have been possible for anyone to summon him, his powers long gone, the vial around Dean's neck just a small spec of what he had once been.

Giles was very eager to show them the spell they had found, a collection of old scripture and new influence from their witch friend Willow.

And Cas was scared. He was sure he wasn't an angel anymore, so why had they been able to summon him? Maybe Sam could help him to find an answer. Maybe.

ENDVERSE AU

[idledreams4]

Guys, I had an amazing idea

I'm going to DM a completely homebrew campaign and it's going to be Supernatural

This literally just like came to me as I was thinking about the dice bag that I'm going to make for my spn dice. I'm going to make it look like a hex bag cause yes, and then I just had this thought I was like "oh my God what if Supernatural D&D campaign" and it kind of spiraled from there

The first thought was to have it happen in enverse, so Lucifer would be the big bad. Or technically Samifer. or Samsifer... whatever you want to call him

And then I was like "but what about Apocalypse world" then we could be taking down Michael!!

And now I don't know what I'm thinking or leaning towards, but I'm kind of also thinking I wanted to happen outside of canon so that my friends who haven't watched the show yet can still take part and like enjoy the story without spoilers

Obviously this would be like a lot of work but I'm willing to do it.

And actually the first thought I had was "let's make this happen in an alternate world so I don't spoil anything for my friends, and maybe later on they run into some version of Sam and Dean" which is how I came up with the Endverse and Apocalypse world ideas.

Though technically endverse was just the future...

Idk.

I'm going to talk to Felicia when I see her in a few weeks and get her thoughts/suggestions (I bet she's gonna love the idea!!)

just because Charlie is best girl (and because technically she's collaborating on this campaign) I'm going to give her a little cameo too. She won't join the party or anything, but I'll have her give them some info to help them out or something.

I'm not gonna talk about my ideas too much incase one of my friends sees this, but know that the wheels are spinning!

[faithdeans]

hi isaac i made this for u. its endverse castiel if he was up giggling playong with his worm

yelp oh my god dex this makes me feel so silly crazy.. that's literally endverse castiel if he was up giggling playing with his worm... he is being so. gentle with it bet he smorks with it real nice too thank you so much i love it forver... 🥺

[shallowseeker]

Shal SPN meta masterpost

(The thought of labeling my unhinged ramblings as "essays" or "meta" honestly gives me hives.) But well. After a year, I'm still here, and I am making and updating this (A) to happily re-visit my thoughts for my own enjoyment and (B) to add to my pinned post.

MY META:

==Most Liked==

Dean, Cas, and sharing pockets

Jack's nephilim eyesight triggering Dean's germ anxiety

== Roles, Identity, Careers, Class ==

Performing Dean, the AV Club, and Jack as varsity MVP

Even when Chuck "humiliates" Castiel, Dean still likes him

Cas + "dad material"

Anna and the angelic non-integration of her own emotions

Are angels terrified of fathering Nephilim?

Jack is not part of a traditional, cookie-cutter nuclear family. That's the WHOLE POINT

Nazi Cas, and the implications for Jimmy Novak

Beware the validity of Cupid in My Bloody Valentine

== Core traits ==

Dean + I don't deserve happiness

Cas + shabby angel of the Lord

Lucifer + cognitive empathy

Lucifer...doesn't really rib Cas that hard about his feelings for Dean

Dean's guilt and emotions make him LOOK guiltier than other characters

Dean + ashamed of being alive

== Symbols ==

Castiel's coat of arms - When Cas dons the overcoat, he hijacks the narrative

Dean, the Cupid, and the insidious motive to demoralize his faith in ever finding "True Love"

Searching for a rainbow + forbidden love is forbidden

Jack ate the world: foreshadowing gods eating souls + nephilim lore

Cas died on a beach! + Jack's place of birth was specifically the famously doomed Washaway Beach

==Car meta ==

Cas + cars (!)

The pimpmobile as a marker of Cas's unsettled identity

The truck is the mark of a family protector and Sam loves little blue cars teehee

Family cars + protecting the ones you love

==Pop culture, music, media ==

Head canon that Dean buried Cas by a windmill, but it’s because he and Cas have had deep conversations about Animal House.

Jack + Dean + hyperfixations on music

==Grief ==

The familial murder of the mother, the blaming of absent father, and the symbolic death of a child in 14x18 Absence

Dean looks around for Cas after he prays in 13x01

Smiting Belphegor made Jack's death real

Harper Sayles and the romanticized first love

How Jack & Dean wanted to look ahead in Optimism and fail at doing it when Jack dies just two episodes later

==TFW dynamics ==

Dean's family was willing to sacrifice him, and that gets overlooked (from an ask)

Dean's Farewell Tour + Avoiding Cas - part 1

TFW are messy disaster parents and I dig it

When Dean killed Belphegor, it was about Rowena, but it was ALSO about [OMITTED]

Cas + resilience + repeat existential crises

Dean & Cas + Covert Communication in 15x09

Claire & Jack are uneasy around each other at best; actively dislike each other at worst

== Breakdowns ==

Jack's best memory was in 13x06; some notes about the scene

Oh, my GOD, Cas. Dean was so stupidly worried about you, you dumbass. (12x17-12x19)

Season 11-12 Lucifer + war + rejection + Jack -> the thing that will give his life new meaning

== Script talk ==

Like a baby lion is proud of his kill, Jack overkills Nick with graphic, brutal efficiency in SPN 14x17 Game Night

The mission before all else + Mary's trust in Jack in 14x17 Game Night

Dean & Cas in season 15: doomed by too much faith in each other?

== Unpopular and/or controversial opinions ==

Dean would never say I Love You to ANYONE in those circumstances.

How Dean and Cas lost the thread of free will in SPN season 15

The incest jokes and innuendos are primarily about class disrespect

The argument that Cas has no parental authority over Jack (and Sam and Dean do)...doesn't hold up

Ben is not's Dean's son. Full stop.

Heaven is a war machine

Endverse Cas + The Nephilim-making Strategy

-> Contrarian takes:

Purgatory isn’t pure in the *good* sense; it’s a suicide trap and a black-and-white, unthinking world (long)

Cas actually DID check out naked Hannah (very long)

Cas has good reason to need forgiveness during the divorce arc...he is not blameless (long)

Does Chuck's female coding carry ill intent?

==Finale metas==

What if Dean dying on the rebar was an accidental manifestation of Chuck!God!Amara!Jack’s latent feelings? (long)

Searchin' for a rainbow + Cas's death + forbidden love (long)

== Funny thoughts ==

Jack + typewriter

Lebanon inhabitants + TFW fake jobs

Jack & Dean + nephilim eyesight + GERMS

Ketch, the father

Sam wigged out when Eileen didn't leave and note and Dean deserved to say things about it - lol

Cas is SO old, y'all

Dean hate-watches Gone with the Wind

Dean doesn't "feel more deeply than anyone," you FOOL

Dean/Cas are that unsettling, unhinged couple who looks absolutely demented when they kiss

== Random ideas ==

What if Cas's Enochian rib carvings affected Cas's abilities to hear Sam and Dean's prayers?

== SPNwin ==

There’s a lot of merit in being anti-destiny, anti-soulmate, anti-chosen-one, anti-Cupid, anti-mirrors/anti-parallels. (long)

Natural crisis points built into The Winchesters character arcs (long)

To be updated.

///

(Text Attributions// Supernatural scripts here via @spnscripthunt. Transcripts are located here via SPNWiki. Visit their Tumblr to donate.)

[synesindri]

creepy gabriel appreciation* time let's go. i think a lot about zachariah and gabriel being similar to each other but i don't really have any posts about it, so. gach communication style comparison post.

("appreciation" is NOT a word mean sarcastically. i love these characters so much and i am very sympathetic to both of them)

zachariah and gabriel both have a penchant for show-don't-tell (or show-first-then-explain) lesson-teaching. they both try to convey their messages by coming up with little scenarios to throw their targets/victims into to try to convince them of something. zachariah plonked sam and dean into an office au to try to persuade them of the immutability of their identities as hunters; gabriel threw them into a time loop to try to persuade sam that he can't change dean's deal. zachariah put dean into endverse to try to get him to say yes to michael; gabriel put sam and dean into a series of tv shows to get them both to stop fighting their status as true vessels. they both love to fuck with reality; they're both creative; they both seem to believe in the power of demonstration (in addition to explanation) as a persuasion tool.

but. i contend that gabriel's scenarios are a lot meaner than zachariah's.

in it's a terrible life, zachariah gives sam and dean a scary situation, but it's a situation they're equipped to handle, and that they have fun with. they don't remember who they used to be, so they're stressing about what to do going forward, not about the context. in the end, zachariah makes it clear that dean is going to visit 2014 specifically to learn a lesson, that there is a specific three-day timeline — it will not go on indefinitely. these are both brutal situations, they would both be horrifying to live through, but they have clear messages, and, for what they are, they aren't really harsher than they need to be. zachariah is creative, but he doesn't seem to be having more fun than is professionally appropriate; he isn't dragging it out; he's choosing painful teaching methods that allow him to play around more than is probably necessary but he doesn't seem to be dragging it out just for the love of the game. he's doing scare-tactic PSAs that have to fit into 30 second advertising slots, basically. (i acknowledge that zachariah also does physical torture but that's a different sort of thing and not what i am talking about rn)

gabriel does not show the same courtesies that zachariah does. gabriel does not provide context, nor does he provide any kind of identity-warping or memory-fuckery to soften the blow. with gabriel, you just experience whatever horrors he sees fit to inflict, and you get to stumble around trying to figure out what the message is — if there even is one — until you learn it or he gets tired of messing with you. he doesn't stick to timelines; his "lessons" go for as long as they go — for all sam knew, the mystery spot situation was over months and months before it was actually over. gabriel's messages, once he communicates them, are also a lot harder to make sense of than zachariah's: the lesson from mystery spot, "play your role," is pretty clear, but it's muddled by how annoyed gabriel seems to be about that being his message, and how conflicted gabriel himself obviously is about playing his own role. the lesson from mystery spot, that sam needs to learn to let dean go, is also pretty clear eventually, but it’s confusing because it’s ostensibly delivered by a pagan god who has no obvious reason to care one way or another about how well sam copes with his brother’s inevitable death (it gets a little clearer in retrospect, but it’s still bizarre). and then on top of all that, gabriel seems to be having a lot more fun with his tricks than zachariah is with his scenarios, delighting in his own cleverness and seeming to find it funny when his target/victims get rattled. it comes across as a game, whereas zachariah’s work comes across as a job. 

and that’s because gabriel is doing everything he’s doing he wants to, whereas zachariah really is doing it because it is his job. zachariah has a prime directive and he has a timeline — and he’s also an angel still hooked into heaven. he’s a cog in the machine; he’s doing what he’s supposed to do; he can enjoy his work but it is to be enjoyed in the service of the greater Plan. gabriel though…gabriel isn’t hooked in anymore. gabriel is, at face value, free. he still is affected by what heaven does, but he’s not one of its agents anymore, so he can do what he wants: no preset goals, no restrictions. and he wants to do is to be cruel in a way that mirrors but is way more indulgent than how most angels are cruel, and he wants to teach heaven’s lessons despite not being on the metaphorical payroll anymore, and he doesn’t want to be to-the-point it about it. (i wonder how much of the lack of clarity of gabriel’s lessons comes from his own uncertainty about what is right and his own experiences of lessons being ambiguous, vs just because he’s having fun being mean.) 

the other thing that makes gabriel scary in this comparison is that gabriel’s involvement is a lot more emotional than zachariah’s. zachariah gets annoyed, but for a long time he stays professional. gabriel, though, tends to flip from having fun to being obviously very angry. he’s much more personally invested, and he’s a lot more emotionally expressive — and because of this and the internal conflict underlying his lessons, he comes across as a lot more volatile. i would much much rather be subjected to one of zachariah’s lessons than one of gabriel’s, partly because it would probably be clearer and wouldn’t last as long, but mostly because i would understand how to interact with him. i would know what he wanted, and i would know he would be pretty sensible about my questions and concerns, because he’s a guy doing his prestigious job. gabriel though…gabriel is an entity with astonishing reality-warping powers who doesn’t make it clear what he wants, who seems to take pleasure in playing cruel pranks, and who is very invested and upset about things i would have no context for at all, in ways he seems conflicted with himself about, and so i therefore would have no way of knowing how to avoid upsetting him more. 

and i think that’s really interesting! that even an angel who isn’t strictly an angel anymore can’t really help but do heaven’s work for it. gabriel is a guy with a skillset that was very valuable at the place he used to work, but he hated the working conditions so he quit, and then wasn’t sure what to do so just kept using those skills but more, and then was mad about it that he couldn’t come up with anything different to do. still defined by his old job because he was a great fit for it, even though he wants to distance himself from that job. it’s probably even dangerous for gabriel to involve himself with sam and dean repeatedly and so pointedly, because he’s supposed to be in hiding and they’re pretty prominently on heaven’s radar — but he can’t help himself, and so he takes it out on them. he’s a great example of angels being capable of enjoying things, but not being great at figuring out how to want things that they haven’t been told to want. it fits in nicely with raphael’s statement in 5.03 “whatever we want, we get” — but what raphael wants is to do what raphael is supposed to want, to follow the plan, because that will lead to paradise. 

[tiktaalic]

what do you like most about supernatural and what are your favorite seasons and episodes?

Really good. Question. I love that they jump the shark I really do. Over and over again. Parody of itself. I love that shark jumping necessitates that they hop tone switches. I love that they do things badly. My favorite thing about season one is that. The John dean sam dynamic feels like getting walloped in the teeth. And season one dean haunts the narrative forever you see forty year old dean and you see 26 year old dean beneath him completely unrecognizable and you want to die. 2 is just a fun motw show that’s interesting and has you engaged in the plot until again. Dean wallops you in the teeth. I would describe 4 as the first major shift because suddenly Real Consequences show up. The Big Plan shows up. Cas is there and it is genuinely so moving to watch him struggle through defecting from everything he’s ever known to become a softer more human thing. 4.01 genuinely really engaging episode even when you know what’s coming it’s fun to watch! It’s fun to go oh ho ho they’re trying to solve the Mystery of what’s powerful enough to Raise Dean From Hell! This Mystery Entity is pulling out all the stops! Doing things we’ve never seen before! What could it be! It’s cas :-). Six mostly sucks but then there man who would be king. Seven mostly sucks but there’s godstiel and born again identity. Eight is. Epic highs and lows for sure. There are some god awful episodes in there. Unwatchable episodes. Skip every time I remember they’re coming up episodes. But. There’s goodbye stranger. There’s the finale. There’s purgatory. Hunter heroci. Cas lobotomies. Naomi. Season 8 is the easiest one for me to romanticize because there’s a heaping pile of shining elements in it. Dean has a spray tan cas is getting brainwashed for caring too much sam is dying of consumption it’s all really quite good except for the episodes that are bad. After that it gets good again in s13. Except for the bad parts zksidnejc. Jack really shook up the show in a good way imo! Stakes ballooned out starting. Season 9 ish? And I think he grounds the show a bit so that interpersonal stakes are the ones that you’re invested in. 14 GREAT season stellar season the best season of supernatural in ages. Start to finish. Jack has a great little plot he wrestles with the entire time about his own development. And there’s the god reveal!!!! Wonderful season. Definitely a favorite. And I know people have mixed feelings on 15 but I think it’s a fun romp until it’s not.

Favorite seasons chronologically: 1 4 8 14

Favorite episodes: oh. Skin. What is and what should never be. All hell breaks loose. Lazarus rising. Monster at the end of this book. That episode in season 4 where cas kills himself by archangel with chuck. Free to be you and me. Head of a pin. Endverse. Man who would be king. Season 7 opener. The purgatory flashbacks are scattered between a few different eps so I just watch the compilation on YouTube. I like the eps with Linda and Kevin. Goodbye stranger. S8 finale. S9 is fucking. Dire. But 9.01 is fine. 9.06 for cas with a baby. Meta fiction. Fan. Fiction. Season 12 opener. Oh that casifer episode where they’re on a submarine that’s fun. That episode where dean yells at Mary in her head. Season 12 finale. The future. The first six episodes of s13 back to back to back to back. I like scorpion and the frog. I like stuck in the middle with you. I like mint condition. Asa fox. Lily sunder. Twigs and twine. Season 14 honestly all bangers once you get past the first 3 eps. INCLUDING! Lebanon. Ouroboros is included in this but I am mentioning it by name because today when I drove to work it was all. That I thought about. Coffin ocean done. Byzantine? I think is the one with Naomi. But again 14 all bangers. 15 I have to say the rupture and the trap. Legally. Belphagor eps those too. Atomic monsters. I liked. I think it was the gamblers? . FRENCH MISTAKE. Um. End of the list from the top of my head.

[mybrainproblems]

Hi I keep thinking about your endverse!Cas in s13 and the brainworms won't stop. Like endverse Cas lost his powers when the angels left so I'm gonna make the assumption that when he comes to this world, his powers will be back. But he's so full of self loathing and so hateful towards other angels, and he literally still thinks of Jack as an abomination because he didn't have any of the s12 arc. And on top of that, he'll learn that Chuck is God and a writer and he couldn't be bothered to save his world, but brought back this Cas, the one that Dean loves and grieves instead of sending Cas to his death, the one that Sam trusts, and he would feel so fucking LONELY. I'm gonna CRY, Alex why do you do this to me

gshdbsjsk I don't want to be starting to answer this at midnight but it's spinning in my brain like the doner at the Lebanese pizza place I used to go to.

So. I think they still get Cas back at the end of Advanced Thanatology but it's endverse!Cas (Jack does still wake up "our" Cas tho). We still have Dean getting the call at the end of the ep but Cas asks where they are and he'll come to them at the bunker. He has his wings now so he's there immediately and is so caught up in DEAN IS ALIVE that he just grabs him and lays one on him. Which Dean kisses back for a moment before realizing that this isn't his Cas but he does know this Cas.

Sam walks in and is super confused. Cas freaks out since the last time he saw him he was Lucifer's vessel and he hasn't quite worked out the details of this timeline besides that he can feel his grace starting to come back and there are no croatoans and everyone is alive and the world isn't totally fucked. They're halfway to reassuring Cas that Sam isn't Lucifer and Dean is trying to get Sam to trust this Cas while also being giddy that a Cas is back while also deeply mourning the apparent loss of "his" Cas. And that's when Jack walks in which touches off a whole round of Cas freaking out that there's a nephil and now he has to deal with a blood freak abomination and a nephil abomination. Jack then gets upset when he realizes that this isn't the Cas who was supposed to be his father and thinks he fucked up trying to bring back Cas.

Somehow Dean manages to get between everyone and get them to chill so they can fill in this Cas on wtf has been going on in this world. Cas continues to lash out at Sam and Jack and sticks close to Dean which Dean knows he shouldn't be happy about but can't help it.

Skipping ahead a ways I do think that Dean sees how Cas treats Jack poorly and feels sick at how much it feels like watching his childhood on replay and eventually tells Cas he needs to leave and check in with heaven which sends this Cas through the fucking roof. Especially now that he's found out about Chuck. He's a huge asshole to everyone but a lot of it is just raw grief for how much he's suffered and lost and this is a Dean so much more whole than the one who sent him to die and yet he's almost as distant. (Tombstone is heartbreaking instead of fun.)

Cas does opt to go out on his own bc he realizes that he just does not fit in with them and it's not fair to anyone (including himself) that he continue to stick around. So now endverse!Cas is on a walkabout on his own...

The above is only like, one or two episodes. "Our" Cas ends up finally clawing his way out of the empty at the end of s13, basically in time for Dean to say yes to Michael. Endverse!Cas having kissed Dean makes things a bit awkward with Cas being back and Dean doesn't know how to act bc this Cas isn't broken the way the endverse one is and clearly that relationship was the result of Cas being corrupted and cut off from heaven so everything else happens exactly the same with the empty deal and confessions. There's just a lot more explicit longing and yearning from Dean.

Endverse!Cas does end up coming back and meets huntercorp!Dean and they fuck off to Brazil together.

I have lots more thoughts but I'm getting incoherent and really need to not totally fuck my sleep schedule...

@doemons-blog, tagging you as well since you sent the initial ask and idk if you're interested in additional thoughts :')

The original post

[bobwess]

Are there any currently unpublished or unwritten parts of your fics/ideas for future fics that you are excited to share with people? Anything you hope to surprise us with?

Also, any advice on dealing with the writing swings (like being really really productive for a week and then having your brain go "welp, that's all you're getting for the next 3 months") and such?

Currently unpublished: DO I EVER. Oh my god. So much.

I wrote a story of Dean wandering for decades in the empty slowly going mad (link), and I made it into chapter 1 of a 3 chapter story, and I'm chomping at the bit to post chapter 2.

And what I am excited most about is my Endverse fic, "Cryin' Won't Help You". I really really love what I've written so far, and I've written a fair bit, but I need to get Ricochet or Beyond Death done before I'm willing to open up another in-progress fic or it won't be fair to anyone. But I'm dying to post. My favorite scene so far is the discussion when they decide on Camp Chitaqua. And I also secretly posted a brief exerpt of this fic in my prompted story (link).

And then, Only Human, I have half of the next chapter (6) written, but then I have almost all of chapter 8 written. I also have a random scene from not next season, but the season after that, and I want to share it, and I am kinda pissed that it'll be like 40 chapters from now minimum.

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Advice: DO I EVER WISH. Fuck if I know, I suffer from this SO BAD.