#going forward i'm going to just add new ones onto this so they just stay connected without me having to redo this

[incculum]

titty fucking zoro after teasing and sucking on his pecs for hours.. him cumming just from his nipples being pinched while your cock pokes and teases his lips <3

Roronoa Zoro.

top male reader

post time-skip Zoro | a little bit of feminization (calling his pecs 'tits') | nipple / chest play & biting | tit-fucking | a little oral

a/n: this almost perfectly fits a Zoro tit-fucking draft I've had for some time so I'm using that & adding to it. (meaning this is a perfect thirst<3 ty)

it turned out little longer too, so I'm making it a one-shot

Zoro groans and the heat in his face only intensifies when your hands continue to wander across his exposed chest and your thumbs press harder against his reddened nipples.

"Let me fuck your tits."

Zoro chokes on his breath. Your words go straight to his dick and you can feel the muscles in his thighs tense around your hips when he presses himself a little closer.

"Don't call them that..." he mumbles.

"How can I not? Your chest is bigger each time I see you." Zoro's head tips forward, watching your hands play with his chest. "Almost like a woman's," you add and smile when Zoro's breath stutters. His fingers play with the band of your pants and you make sure to maintain eye contact. It's so unlike him to be this shy and flustered, he knows it but he really can't help it around you, and you know it, too.

You cup his chest with your hands and bring your head down to press a kiss against the scar that noticeably contrasts his flushed skin. You rub circles around his nipples with your thumbs and a strangled moan leaves him when you can't help but lower your head further, biting the sensitive flesh and adding another spot to his already mark-littered chest. His hips jut forward and he has to hold onto your shoulders to keep himself from toppling over in your lap, making you laugh quietly. He squeezes your shoulders tightly in retaliation and you only press a kiss against the new bite mark in response. You flatten your tongue and softly run it over his scar before moving past it, swirling your tongue around his nipple and rolling the other between your fingers. Zoro groans and pants into your ear and his hips rock forward when you softly bite. His ass grinds against your hard-on and you feel his thighs tremble around you before he stops moving all together and his chest heaves against yours. You can feel his cum begin to soak through his and your clothing again when he doesn't make any efforts to move away and you only smile against his skin.

"Did you cum, again?" You lift your head and Zoro's eye stays trained on you, almost looking at you like a timid virgin. "It's only fair for it to be my turn now." Zoro doesn't answer but his face turns a deeper red.

"Please?" You lean in and ask against his lips, hushed and careful. Your pointer fingers and thumbs hook around his swelling nipples once more and pinch softly. Zoro lets out an equally soft sigh through his nose but doesn't complain, giving you the response you were hoping for in a quiet tone matching yours, "..fine."

You tilt your chin forward and the way he kisses you back shows you just how excited he really is. Zoro pants softly when you part and you cup his cheek in your hand, softly rubbing the scar that forces his left eye shut with your fingers. A flustered heat radiates off of his skin and into your palm. "Need a moment?"

"No," he answers quickly before catching himself, "no, I'm fine," he briefly grins at you when you whisper an 'okay' before lifting himself off of your lap, following the guidance of your hands on his hips and allowing you to see him already beginning to get hard again when he takes a step back.

You don't comment on it, instead shifting closer to the edge of the bed. Zoro kneels down in front of you, fingers already slipping into your waistband. Part of him is a little disappointed you took your hands off of his chest, but the anticipation pooling in his stomach makes up for any complaints teetering on the tip of his tongue.

"You seem," you lift your hips to make it easier for Zoro, and he pulls your pants and underwear down to your thighs in one motion, "a little more eager than you were letting on." He lets out a sharp huff through his nose at your little tease, briefly looking up into your eyes, but unable to argue.

"Maybe."

Your hips jump slightly when he wraps his rough hands around your cock. You watch him lean forward and part his lips, drooling onto your hard-on and his knuckles, "fuck, Zoro."

Zoro raises his head again and sits back onto his heels. He twists his wrists simultaneously, watching you sigh when his slick spit spreads over your cock. His thumb rubs against your slit with a rare gentleness and he swallows the saliva gathering in his mouth again at the sight of your wet dick.

"Okay," he mutters, mostly to himself, pushing himself up onto his knees and pulling his hands away from your cock, though his gaze stays trained on it as he cups his chest and leans forward. He pauses for a moment when your cock presses up against his chest and pushes his pecs together.

You cup the back of Zoro's head with your left hand, breath catching in your throat when his tits envelop your cock so perfectly. You briefly wonder just how eager he must have been if he already knows exactly what to do without you saying a single word to guide him.

His earrings jingle with every move and bump against your fingertips, tearing you away from your thoughts. Your cock leaves a shiny mix of your pre-cum and Zoro's saliva behind on his skin when it seems to almost disappear between his pecs and reappear right against his lips. His chest hugs your dick so well. It's so warm and surprisingly soft. He pulls his bottom lip in between his teeth and finds his fingers pressing up against the sensitive spots on his tits, trying to replicate your touch. He holds his chest in his palms and pinches his swollen nipples. A soft sound rips out of him and his thighs tense and press together. He shifts on his knees and sighs through his nose.

"You're.." the tip of your cock pokes Zoro's lips and paints them with your pre-cum like a sheer lip gloss every time he pushes himself down, leaving behind a thin string of fluids connecting his mouth and your tip when your dick disappears back between his tits, "..really good at this," you mutter.

"Yeah?" He can't help but stare at your cock sandwiched between his pecs and his thoughts can't help but concentrate on the way your tip taps at his lips.

"Yeah." You inhale sharply when Zoro slowly licks his lips clean of your pre-cum with a low moan, now looking up at you again. His fingers stay pressed against his nipples and he gives you a brief, smug smile, not giving you a chance to question what it means before his head tips downwards.

A gasp of Zoro's name leaves your lips when he sticks his tongue out and laps at the head of your dick whenever it appears in front of his mouth. He gives you a quick glance and his lips form an open-mouthed smile when your fingers curl into the bedsheets and your arm jerks, pushing his head down lower with your hand still on the back of his head.

Zoro lets you push him and looks up at you through his eyelashes. He's sure he'll let you do anything to him if it means he'll be the one making you cum.

[a-b-riddle]

A Simple (Mis) Understanding Chapter Two: Numbness & Pain

Daisy

I always used to think it was an exaggeration of how pregnancy is a constant state of exhaustion. But it was a lot of work growing a tiny human. Add in the fact that I'm still working 40 + hours a week and, of course, something is always causing some sort of discomfort or pain.

Swollen feet, back pain, nausea; I can't even find any solace in sleep. The 32 week mark felt so close, yet still so far. Another eight or so weeks of this seems like a drop in the bucket compared to how far along I am, but still. That still another two months. So far away when you want to be done, but still too short compared to everything I still have yet to do.

Another two months to set up a crib and wash her new clothes. Another two months to figure out a name and make decisions that I always envisioned making with a partner. Another two months of struggling to do things like picking up shit off the floor or staying on my feet long enough to make a decent meal.

But right now, I wasn't worried about the two months ahead of me and all the things I still have to do. Right now, I was looking forward to a three day undisturbed weekend. The pain in my feet and sciatica was becoming so bad, I had taken Friday off to see a doctor and spend the rest of the weekend doing nothing, but sitting in my modest little house and watching mind rotting television. I might even indulge in some spicy reading. Heaven knows its been too long.

Or at least, it hasn't been since them. That day in the office, but... that really didn't count. I often wrestled with myself about it. That one time erased any feelings I had for any of them. But I felt a bit pathetic how it now tainted every good memory I had with them. Kyle bringing me something to snack on when he realized I hadn't gone to the mess hall. Price always having a cup of earl grey tea cooling for me first thing in the morning. Two packs of zero calorie sweetner and a bit of honey.

Sweet like you.

I couldn't stand the smell of it now. I blamed it on the hormones. A lot of things made me queasy, but something about the smell of the bergamot, made me sick in a completely different way. A feeling not of nausea, but of... fear. Like the same way a pentagram could summon demons, earl grey could summon mine. As if John Price was somehow there any time the scent lingered in the air.

But he wasn't. None of them were. Fuck. Why did my thoughts always go back to them at some point? No. This was going to be a relaxing weekend god dammit. Fuck them.

Almost angrily, I hit the garage key fob, shutting the door and engulfing me into darkness; a thin line of light leaking through the bottom of the garage door. When I had opened my door, I could at least see a path to my mudroom. I grabbed my purse, ready to go in, when I felt it.

Hundreds of needles. Stabbing and digging into my feet. Not just the soles, but the entire fucking foot the moment I bared any weight on them. I pulled off my flats and it was then I noticed how angry they looked. Red and swollen and all but screaming at me to sit my fat ass back down. I wiggled my toes, trying to get some blood flow. Fuck. Why didn't they hurt while I was driving?

I manage to get onto my feet, using the car door as support. Steading myself until I was ready to take the first step. By the time I had managed to all but crawl inside, ten minutes had passed since my initial arrival time. I got off at 5:00, but usually didn't log off until almost 6:00. Granted, I work from home, but I had run out of a few essentials. Essentials now that were in the boot of my car.

Fuck.

10 minutes won't hurt. Not like there is any thing frozen. Speaking of which, I forgot my ice cream... dammit. I really need to start keeping a list on the fridge. It's hard to remember when pregnancy brain (or stomach) takes over and I slam a container in a single sitting.

Grabbing a pillow from the couch, I went to the kitchen. Which considering the town house, or terraced housing I suppose now, was perfect for a single and expecting Omega it was cozy. Not like the base where going from the common area to the chow hall was about a three minute stroll.

I get down and lay on my back. Carefully maneuvering so my ass rests against the cabinets before I hook the back of my heels unto the counter top so I could rest my feet a bit. Not the most sanitary, but it wasn't like I had guests. It was just me. For now.

It took a few moments to adjust. My back ached against the hardwood, but I could already feel the relief from my feet and legs. It wasn't all that shocking that I was having a hard time with them. I had gained a considerable amount of weight during my pregnancy. When I had brought it up to the OBGYN about possibly cutting back on food, her suggestion was to simply not weigh myself at home. Now when I went in for a visit they made me turn around before taking my weight.

It was hard. I've always had a problem with how I looked and now adding pregnancy then taking away the option to diet and exercise didn't exactly help.

I pulled out my phone and was preparing to open my kindle app when I saw a tiny red bar in the top right corner of my phone. Of course. I get nice and settled and my phone is on 2 fucking percent. Whatever. I tell Alexa to set an a timer for fifteen minutes and take a little nap. Maybe meditate.

A knock on the door quickly brings any possibility of relaxation to a pause. Margaret next door was dropping off Winnie off early to go to her book club. Margaret was a widow and a recent empty nester. She had spent her life as a mother and a homemaker. When I got custody of Winnie two months ago, she had quickly stepped up in helping me with everything from child rearing to managing my pregnancy.

"Hello, Maggie!" I greeted from the floor. "Hello, Winnie Darling." Winnie had the same sand colored hair as me and bright green eyes. Her face was a shade of red and I could smell her from the entryway. Someone would need a bath today. Fantastic.

"Oh, Dear!" Maggie fussed, setting Winnie down on her feet before coming over to me. "Are you alright?" Winnie didn't bother stopping to hug me like she normally would before making a beeline toward the potty. She usually was a creature of habit, but nature calls I suppose.

"Feet are a bit swollen." I waved off. "Just resting them a bit."

"I don't have to go tonight." She set her bag down. A deep green corduroy shoulder bag that always had just what you needed in it. A wet wipe, hand sanitizer, a spare tissue and even a stain pen when a spill happened at the most inconvenient time. "I'll stay and-"

"Maggie." I said, trying my best to sound at firm, but it was hard with her. No one told Maggie 'no'. "It's alright. Just a bit of water retention. Nothing to fret over." And it wasn't. I could already feel the pain from earlier subside.

"Really, it's no bother." She argued, bending over to unstrap one of her shoes. "It's a bloody stupid book anyway. I just go for the gossip really."

"Maggie." I tried again. "Really."  "It's getting close to the due date and I don't want to burn out on me just yet." It was a lie. Even with her greying hair, a deepened laugh line, Maggie didn't burn out. She was one of the few Omegas I had met in my life and she could run circles around any of them, myself included.

The sound of flushing sounded from the bathroom followed by the faucet. She huffed before slipping her shoe back on. "If you insist."

"I do." I encouraged. As much as I loved having Maggie's help, I hated feeling like a burden. She had raised her children. It was time for her to do things for herself. "Besides, we'll see you tomorrow after my appointment tomorrow." The bathroom door clicked open, revealing my little Win with the front of her smock covered in water. Fantastic.

"Hi, Mommy." Winnie finally greeted. Her freshly washed hands dripping water droplets onto the hardwood. "What are you doing?"

"My feet hurt so I'm just letting them rest." I explained, looking up at her. Winnie was rambunctious as most four-year-olds without a sense of self preservation are, but when I explained to her how careful she had to be now that I had her sister in my belly, her nature had become more gentle.

It worried me as much as it warmed my heart. 

"Why don't you sit on the couch?" She asked. Her head tilting to the side, face etched as if she were trying to figure out my reasoning.

"Because it helps when you lift your feet up high in the sky, Winnie Pooh." Maggie explained before looking back at me. "Well if you're sure-"

"I am. Go." I urged. "We'll see you tomorrow. Lunch around noon?" Spending time with Maggie didn't make me feel like such a parasite when I knew she enjoyed the company. Her children had all moved away, only one staying in the UK. She wasn't so alone, but neither was I.

"Wouldn't miss it." She gave a soft smile. The laugh lines around her face deepening. "See you tomorrow, Dearies." She said, retreating back outside. The soft sound of the door clicking behind her.

Winnie had laid down beside me. Yep. Definitely going to need a bath tonight. "How was school today?" Winnie went to a pre-school that was luckily covered under my insurance. Perks of being an Omega. I'll take it where and when I can.

She talked about going to the playground and painting. All the usual bits. Who she played with and new things she learned. Then came the question. A question she had asked before in passing. A subject I changed with ease before. 'Have you brushed your teeth? How about another episode of Bluey? Put on your trainers (because we can't just say tennis shoes anymore) and we'll go for a walk to the park. I had skirted around the question with ease. 

"Why don't you have a mate if you have a baby?" Winnie was too young to get the answers to a lot of life's difficult questions. Why did Tiffany not like us? Why didn't she get to see her daddy anymore? Why did that man look at you weird on the train, mommy?  I wish she would just stay this little. That she never needed or want to know the harsh truths about me, us.

"I..." I wracked my brain for an answer and just came up short. I couldn't think of a way to sugarcoat it. We almost had a mate. Mates. We almost had a pack that would have walked you to school on the mornings my feet were too sore or I was already running late. They would have loved you. "It... it's complicated, Darling." Is what I chose instead. The other worrisome fact is that Winnie was too young to understand the concept about mates. I had never broached the subject which only means she probably heard it from some little shithead at school. 

Wonderful.

"I'll explain it when you're older." I promise, closing my eyes and letting her snuggle into the crook of my arm. "Do you wanna rest your eyes with me?"

"Like when I'm five?" She asks putting one of her hands underneath my shirt onto my belly. It had become a thing she had started since I told her about the baby.

"Maybe six." I said, looking down at her. She gave a yawn before closing her eyes.

"I think five is better."

"Okay, Win." I said. "When you're five we'll talk about it." It was a promise I hoped she would forget. But I didn't want to negotiate with a four-year-old about something future me could deal with. I wanted just 15 minutes of this. I order Alexa to set a timer to make sure we haven't dozed too far off. Winnie still needed to shower and eat. I still needed to get the groceries out of the car. But I could spare another 15 minutes.

[gay-dorito-dust]

okay so I just read the blurb about cannibal and reader going north to avoid family drama and that got me thinking !!

what if reader went to dorne and arrived at sunspear during the name day celebration of qoren martell eldest daughter (who is also the heir to dorne) and reader is invited to dine with the martell as a special guest.

the martell's have a lot of questions for her. here are a quotes I came up with from the dinner conversations:

a martel prince - "so which colour do you bare in this brewing war. black or green?"

reader - "neither, my loyality is to myself and my dragon. the highborns can do as they please, but I will not allow myself and my dragon to be turned into pawns so incestious maniacs can war over an ugly-looking metal chair and matching hat"

qoren martell - "there must be somthing special about your blood, as it is not everyday that someone who is not a targaryen claims a dragon."

reader - "there is not much special prince qoren, if you were to cut me now and smear my blood next to another hundred common borns I'm afraid you wouldn't be able to tell the difference."

and then the eldest daughter (who is clearly into reader) asks to ride cannibal and begs her parents to let her (they reluctantly agree) but reader needs a bit more convincing.

heir princess of dorne - "I am not scared"

reader - "it is not a question of being scared or not. it is the question of if cannibal will eat you or not."

okay now stay with me on this what is reader rubs her sent (like an item of her clothing) on the princess to decrease the chances of cannibal eating her. and the two go for a flight and end up kissing which cannibal isn't to happy with. and the two girls def end up becoming a lot more than just friends. heheh hope you like this idea feel free to ignore it if it's shit <3

I hope this was alright for you, sweetheart. Sorry if it seems a little clunky in some places.

I love the idea that people have heard news of reader being a non-Valyrian who claimed the wildest of all dragons, and are just naturally curious as to what makes them unique for Cannibal to finally yield and take up a rider.

It’s a mystery that no one will ever know, not even reader cuz they’re probably just as confused about that. However it isn’t something that you want to delve in deeper because you were well aware that many houses, both big and small, had their eyes on you and were anxious.

Houses such as Bracken, Blackwood, Celtigar, Tully, lannisters, Baratheon’s, Starks, Greyjoy, Aryn etc. The realm holds its breath whenever you pass by on Cannibal, halting all forms of conflict as you soared above them unbothered. You just wanted to be left alone and you could feel that Cannibal felt similar.

You knew from stories that to doubt your bond with a dragon was dangerous but your bond with cannibal was forged out of your common desire, to be able to be free to live how you felt fit, free of the personal agendas of the highborn.

So when you arrived at Dorne, you were easily spotted by the royal family and were greeted in kind as a guest on the behest of the princess of Dorne herself, who was quick to cling onto your arm and smile as you spoke while Cannibal watched on, tired of yet another person filling to hide their seemingly immediate infatuation with you. He only hopes that you were asked for your hand…again.

So once you arrived to dinner, the questions were quick to spill and you answered them in quick succession.

‘The throne is rather ugly, I see no reason to fight over it when I’d rather have it burned.’ You told them as you sipped from your goblet, trying to not be affected by the way that the Dornish princess was rubbing the back of your hand softly, sweetly. ‘Besides people have already forgotten the cause of this war and are too fickle to remember as they’re too eager in spilling blood.’ You add.

Qoren Martel, with wise eyes, leaned forward. ‘You are a nomad? You fly no flag for either cause?’

‘No.’ You tell her.

‘Why? Were their offers not sufficient for you? Did gold and glory not arise any temptation within you?’ Qorne pressed as a silence befell the table as you felt the eyes of the princess and prince on you, but you were far too use to the questions being asked as they were the same you’ve heard from the likes of Alicent, Otto, Rhaenyra and Daemon.

You were the wild card they didn’t see nor expect and now we’re trying to quell you and Cannibal before the war reached a point where Dragons were brought into it. You were Cannibal’s counterpart in human skin as he was yours in dragon scales, you two were a force to be reckoned with and you had yet to engage in combat.

‘The thoughts of riches and glory and power is enough to tempt even the strongest man in Westeros, I however value things that go beyond such.’ You told her.

‘And what is that?’ Qorne inquired, raising her brow, curiosity taking over her as it did Dornish prince beside her as he too leant in close to her your words.

‘To find peace, to be left alone and out of the minds of every person in the realm. There was a reason cannibal never left his cave and yet, he came out for me and now he will not know rest because of me, and I want him to find rest be it with or without me.’ You tell her as you thought about how tired Cannibal had become during your journey, you could feel the ache of his bones as though it were you who were tired, you loved Cannibal and respected him immensely but you didn’t wish to have him suffer for the greed of others.

From a distance Cannibal lets out a groan, as though feeling your emotions through your bond to let you know that he made his choice in his rider, and that he did not liked his choice to be one of contention if his rider is feeling strongly about his wellbeing. For he was a dragon of old Valyria and could handle more than what was given to him now.

Stubborn old fool. You thought to yourself.

I heard you little one. You then heard cannibal speak in your mind, his voice a low timbre that could be felt within your chest, through your bones and more. You weren’t certain if Aemond, Aegon, daemon or the others could heard the voices of their dragons within their one head, or if you were the only one who had achieved such a thing; Either way it was just another thing that made you feel even more alone.

‘You put the realm at risk for the sake of your dragon?’ The Dornish prince asked as though the thought befuddled him.

‘It is not I who will torch Westeros.’ You reminded him, ‘it’s the Targaryen’s that are currently infighting right now who will, in merely a commoner who just so happened to be favoured by a god.’

‘A god? You consider your dragon on equal footing with the gods?’ The princess next to you asked eagerly as she gripped your hand.

‘Shouldn’t we all?’ You rhetorically replied before carrying on. ‘The Targaryens have fooled themselves into thinking their superior due to their control over them, a fallacy I call it, but if you take away their control. So who’s to say that they can’t be cut down like any other man regardless of social status.’ You looked into Qoren Martel’s eyes when you say this as a look of understanding passes over her face.

‘Can I ride with you on Cannibal?’ The princess asked suddenly and you almost chocked on your drink as Qorne was quick to voice her displeasure at her daughter’s brashness.

‘Of course you cannot.’ She barked, ‘that beast will seat no other than his rider.’ She then looks over to you, ‘am I correct in that assumption?’

‘Of course!’ You replied quickly as you aided in her attempts to prevent the princess from doing anything reckless. ‘Cannibal will not permit anyone other than me to ride upon his back, he’s…’ you paused as you looked behind yourself to see Cannibal reach up and feast upon a flock of birds passing by, ‘…well he’s as the legend of old speak of.’

The princess didn’t seem pleased with your answer as she stared you down. ‘I can handle it.’

You and Qorne Martel shared a look across the table that spoke of exhaustion that felt as though lasted for hours on end until it was broken by a sigh. ‘Fine you may fly with our guest on Cannibal but on one condition.’

‘Anything mother.’ The princess said, back straightened.

‘Come right back.’ Qorne said with finality as the princess was quick to grab you by the arm and drag you towards cannibal but before she was about to mount him, you pull her back and she looked at you with furrowed brows. ‘Why did you stop me?’

You didn’t speak a word but rip a piece of your clothing from your person and began rubbing it on the princess wrists, neck, cheeks and arms. ‘Protecting you.’ You said afterwards, letting go of her arm as she quickly mounted cannibal who gave you a look before you mounted him.

‘Hold on tight princess.’ You whispered in the beautiful woman’s ear as you reached past her and patted Cannibal twice before gripping the princess by her waist, pulling her close to your front as you took off to the skies above.

Cannibal wasn’t at the least impressed, and was even made more so when he looked behind to see that the princess had your face held between her hands as she leant in for a kiss. You didn’t make any moves to stop her as you indulged yourself in her sweet lips, heavenly and intoxicating as she was as you closed your eyes. Who’d knew kissing in the sky would be as romantic as you initially thought?

Cannibal only huffed as he continued to fly onward, he’ll let you have this one moment, you’ve been more then deserving of it for what the realm has put you both through.

[supernaturalscribe67]

Eyes

Words: 8,052

POV: 3rd Person

Pairing: Castiel x Male!Winchester!Reader

Warning(s): Language, multiple character death, torture, TWD reference sprinkled in there, Lucifer being Lucifer, Nightmares, Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Animal Abuse (?) idk the butterfly isn't real, Castiel is the sweetest boyfriend known to man

Summary: The reader recently got Castiel back, and he has convinced himself that everything is back to normal, but the past has a tendency to haunt us, refusing to let go. What happens when the one person he loves more than life itself begins to remind him of the one that caused him the most pain?

Request:

Hi! I was wondering if you could do a Cas x winchester!reader(male and romantic) where Reader wakes up from a nightmare, Castiel is there to comfort them, but he refuses to tell Castiel what the nightmare was about.

After more and more repetitive nightmares every night, Cas finally got him to tell him what it was about. It turns out it was about readers' experience with Castifer. (I'm giving you free range with what happened)

The brothers can be there too, or they can be on a hunt, you choose. Thank you! I love your writing sm btw

Anonymous

A/N: It's been a while! In the course of writing this story, which consisted of 38 handwritten pages, we've had two staff members at work quit, leaving only two teachers in the entire center with a director who refuses to be in the classroom, so I've been working open-close, coming in early and staying late off the clock, and just trying to mentally recover over the weekend. Yay us :) I hope to get back in the groove of things now that this request is out of the way, as I knew I wanted it to be long enough to add the detail I had in mind. I hope I did your request justice and, as always, feedback is greatly appreciated!

~ Much Love!

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.

The woods near the bunker were beautiful. Tall, thick oaks decorated the skies above. Below sat wildlife. Squirrels scurried about to gather food, rabbits burrowed beneath the base of various tree trunks, robins collected sticks for their nests, and butterflies rested on wildflowers that grew on the spare patches of grass. It was a stunning forest to explore, one that (Y/N) and Castiel had walked through thousands of times, and with each instance, new beauties were presented. There was never a dull moment in nature, which was what the couple appreciated about it. Even the parts of the world that some would consider ugly were attractive to them, and they were loved even more.

They wandered through the woods as they normally did, hand in hand. Their eyes scanned every aspect of the ground below their feet and stopped to mention the most notable elements. One thing that caught (Y/N)’s eye and halted their walk altogether was a stray flower that had grown at the base of a towering oak tree. (Y/N) pulled Castiel to the flower and knelt on the ground to get a closer look. The petals were a soft white, painted with a dusting of woodchips, and the center was bright yellow. Just as (Y/N) was about to reach down and touch it, the quiet flutter of wings filled his ears.

Out of his peripherals flew a magnificent monarch butterfly. It took a moment to brush past his nose before it landed gracefully in the center of the flower. (Y/N) broke out into a large, bright smile as he glanced over at Castiel. He, too, had a smile, only his was softer. Slowly, Castiel reached his free hand forward, his index finger extended. The butterfly confidently climbed onto Castiel’s finger, as if they were old friends. When it was fully nestled in his hand, Castiel withdrew it and moved his hand so it rested between their bodies.

(Y/N) stared in awe at the closeness of the creature. The intricate detail on the wings, the way the antennae moved, the small size of its body, all of it was beautiful. Remarkable. A true gift to the universe.  For a moment, (Y/N) looked up at Castiel, and he could feel the love in his heart. He was so kind and caring. A gentleman - angel if you will - and (Y/N) could not ask for a better lover.

Then his smile changed.

Instead of the peaceful grin he wore before, the corners of his lips curled into - need I say - a devilish smirk. In an instant, Castiel grabbed the butterfly’s wings between his index and middle finger and crushed them. (Y/N) opened his mouth and felt his throat contract, as if to gasp, but no sound came out. He looked up at Castiel’s eyes, and one thing that he noted was the fact that they were no longer the oceanic color he had grown fond of. They were dark, and gloomy, as if to represent an upcoming storm. When Castiel’s look shifted so their eyes connected, (Y/N) felt his stomach drop.

That wasn’t his Castiel.

“Pathetic little creatures, don’t you think?” He leered.

Lucifer.

(Y/N)’s chest rose and fell rapidly in tandem with his breaths. He wanted to run, to scurry away until he was out of sight, but he couldn’t find the strength in him to move. It was as if he was bound to the Earth, held captive by God himself. Lucifer chuckled.

“What’s wrong, (Y/N)? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.” The voice didn’t belong to Castiel, despite wearing the same face.

(Y/N) tracked the movements of his hand - his familiar hand - as Lucifer reached over and brushed his fingers through his hair. Still, (Y/N) couldn’t move. Even his touch was different.

“Oh, how I’ve missed that look. It was so much fun to mess with you. So fun that I just had to come back. Did you miss me?” The last question came out barely above a whisper.

Still, (Y/N) said nothing. He failed to notice that the world around him had stopped, frozen in time. All he could focus on was the terror that reflected in Lucifer’s deep, dark eyes. The eyes of his lover. The lover who was no longer there.

“Oh, it doesn’t matter. The important thing is, now we’re back together! And, in this little dreamland of yours, you can’t get rid of me. No, you’re not strong enough to. Because all you see in front of you is your precious little Castiel, and why would you want to get rid of him, right?”

(Y/N) felt himself blink rapidly. No. He’s not real. Nothing is real. It was all fake, a trick his mind made up to make him suffer. His sick, twisted mind. All he had to do was wake up.

“Sick and twisted is a little harsh, don’t you think?” Lucifer smirked.

Wake up.

“Stay with me, come on,”

Wake up.

“Stay.”

Wake up!

*~*

(Y/N) gasped as he jolted upright. His heart pounded in his chest, eyes blown wide. A thick layer of sweat coated his brow. One good look at his surroundings and he could see he was no longer in the forest. He was in his room, in the bunker. He was safe.

A hand pressed against his shoulder, which caused him to jump and let out a shout of surprise. To his right, Castiel sat on the bed, worry hidden behind his electric blue eyes. Blue eyes. His eyes. The eyes he fell in love with. His safety. As suddenly as he awoke, his nerves calmed and he could feel his heartbeat regulate. 

“Are you alright, (Y/N)?” Castiel spoke with his normal, gruff voice.

It’s Cas.

(Y/N) let out a shaky breath and gave a small nod. “Yeah, yeah, I’m okay. Just…had a bad dream.”

“I’m sorry, Bumblebee. Do you want to talk about it?” Castiel asked as he reached up and gently cupped (Y/N)’s cheek.

He leaned into the comfort of Castiel’s hand. The fear and stress washed away. He smiled a little wider. “It was just a hunting dream, nothing more.” He spoke softly as he reached a hand up to touch Castiel’s.

With a troublesome expression still on his face, Castiel gently grasped (Y/N)’s hand, brought it to his lips, and kissed his knuckles.

“Are you sure? You seemed rather bothered by it.”

“I’m positive.”

Castiel smiled sweetly. “Okay,” he whispered and placed a kiss on his forehead. “Would you like to sleep again? It’s still early, and Sam and Dean aren’t expected back for several more hours. I can hold you while you rest. Perhaps that’ll keep the nightmares at bay.”

(Y/N) opened his mouth to turn down the offer, but quickly shut it. The idea of being held in Castiel’s arms while he slept seemed to put him at ease. Maybe Castiel was right. There was a chance he could feel better that way. More at peace. Then his nightmares wouldn’t appear and, instead, they would be relaxing dreams. He missed those.

“I’d like that,” he said and laid back down on his side, facing Castiel.

Castiel lay beside him, mirroring his position, one arm wrapped under him and the other around his waist. (Y/N) laid his head on Castiel’s arm, nose brushed against his chest, and was instantly filled to the brim with warmth. In his arms, he felt protected, safe, and secure. The same security a child had when they were covered by their blanket. 

Gingerly, Castiel placed a kiss on (Y/N)’s forehead. “Goodnight, my sweet Bumblebee.” As he spoke, it was as if his words dripped with love and adoration.

“Goodnight, my angel.” (Y/N) whispered.

*~*

Just as he was about to drift off into slumber, light kisses could be felt on the shell of his ear. Stubble tickled his neck and cheek, and he couldn’t help but grin tiredly.

“Cas, I’m trying to sleep,” his mumble sounded more like a whine as he let out hearty chuckles.

Kisses turned to nibbles at his protests, and he couldn’t hold back the giggles that erupted within him. (Y/N) tried to swat him away, but Castiel was persistent. After a moment, he began to trail sloppy kisses down his jawline, to his chin, then gave him a peck on his lips.

(Y/N) slowly opened his eyes and smiled up at him, but when Castiel pulled back and opened his own eyes, he was met with a familiar look of dark clouds.

“Thought you could get away from me that easily?” He asked.

(Y/N)’s smile vanished and his eyes widened. He swiftly pulled back from Lucifer’s grasp. In his getaway, his hand fumbled off the side of the bed and he fell to the floor. Instead of the concrete bunker floor he had expected, he landed on a soft dirt ground that was littered with natural debris. As he quickly looked around, he could see that he was back in the forest he had been in before he awoke. In any other situation, he would be full of peace in that setting. All he could feel, though, was a sense of dread.

Lucifer let out a deep chuckle that rumbled the Earth below. He moved to perch himself on the edge of the bed, feet planted on the ground on either side of (Y/N)’s body. The smirk on his face stood out as he looked down at him.

“(Y/N), you wound me! After all the time we spent together?” Lucifer pouted and placed a hand on his chest to feign hurt.

“You’re not real.” (Y/N) breathed.

Lucifer pursed his lips. “Pretty sure I am,” he nodded and stood from the bed so he towered over him. “Maybe I can get another kiss to figure it out.”

(Y/N) began to crawl backward, his eyes never leaving Lucifer’s. “No, no, no! This is all a dream! It’s all a dream. All I have to do is wake up again and you’ll be gone.”

“Oh, sweetheart, it’s so funny that you think you can run away again.”

“Fuck you!”

“Only if you want to.” Lucifer laughed.

(Y/N) sneered in disgust and finally pushed himself off of the ground. For a split second, his eyes left Lucifer, and, at that moment, he had vanished. His heart thumped to the beat of a thousand drums, and he swore he could hear it in his ears. He turned around completely in an attempt to find Lucifer, but he was nowhere to be found. Oddly enough, he found no comfort in his absence. With the forest as eerily quiet as it was, it was as if he was in the eye of the storm. That he could be hunted before he knew it.

And he wasn’t going to stick around for it.

His movements were slow at first as if he were covered in a thick layer of honey. Eventually, he gained momentum and began to rush through the maze of trees. Leaves under his feet crunched and branches cracked under the power of his steps. He did not know where he was headed, nor where he would end up, if anywhere, but all he knew was that he needed to get as far away from Lucifer as possible.

“You can run, but you can’t hide, (Y/N).” Lucifer’s sing-song voice echoed against the trees as if he were right on top of him.

He swore at any moment his heart would give out. If he thought about it too much, he was sure it would explode. He wouldn’t put it past Lucifer.

“Come out, come out, wherever you are.” He sounded closer, but that didn’t break (Y/N) out of his sprint. If anything, he went faster.

“I see you! Can you see me?” Lucifer laughed, and that caused the back of (Y/N)’s head to throb.

The corners of his vision started to blacken and his heart felt like it stopped. At once, his legs seized to function, and his feet scraped against the ground, not enough stamina in his body to lift them. It would prove to be his downfall as, seconds later, the tip of his foot caught on a protruding root. His whole body fell to the ground with a heavy thud.

(Y/N) felt drunk, as if his entire world spun rapidly. A soft groan fell from his lips and he opened his eyes, but he was met with nothing but darkness. He felt so helpless. So lost. So scared.

He had to wake up. 

Footsteps echoed around him as if someone actively encircled his body. They stalked him, teased him, and filled his mind with thoughts that raced, too fast to comprehend. They made him want to run, but his blindness made it impossible.

Have to wake up.

Have to wake up.

Please wake up.

Then, he spoke.

“Waking up won’t do anything, you know. I’ll still be here, waiting.” Lucifer chuckled deeply.

Suddenly, Lucifer snapped his fingers, and (Y/N)’s vision was restored. They were back in the war room of the bunker. Lucifer, still clad in Castiel’s face, had his hands placed in the pockets of his trenchcoat. He began to circle (Y/N), as a predator would its prey, eyes trained on his.

“I’ll be trapped in your little dream world with nothing to do but twiddle my thumbs. That’s okay, though, because I know that, while you’re out there awake and somewhat alert, you’ll be thinking of me. Not only that, but you’ll see me, too.”

“No-” (Y/N) began weakly.

“Yes! You will,” Lucifer’s voice got louder, and the ground began to quake. “Because every time you look at your sweet angel Cassie, all you’ll see is me. All you’ll hear is me. All you’ll feel is me.”

“Cas is nothing like you.”

“Maybe not in terms of charms or amazing personality, but when it comes to looks, we are the same.” Lucifer slowly walked up and squatted down next to him. “While you lay in bed in Cassie’s arms, and you look up at him one more time to say goodnight, you won’t be able to think of anything but me.”

(Y/N)’s jaw clenched. “I won’t let you control me.”

Lucifer let out a low chuckle, deep enough to sound similar to a growl. “Oh, (Y/N). Sweet, sweet, (Y/N). It seems you’re mistaken,” he reached over, grabbed his chin, and lifted his head so their eyes met. “I already do.”

*~*

Another pothole, another curse from the eldest Winchester. Kansas backroads and highways were notorious for their terrible patchwork. The cities and counties would spend weeks on end filling any hole that had been reported only for their work to deteriorate after the next rainfall. It was all a ploy to get more money from taxpayers, and the Winchesters were glad they didn’t have to contribute to such a scam. 

While most in the car sat jolted by the road conditions, nothing seemed to rouse (Y/N) from his slumber in the backseat, something Sam and Dean were jealous of. Castiel, on the other hand, sat worried in the opposite seat. His eyes hadn’t left (Y/N) for some time, and the lack of response from his partner whenever Dean would curse nearly at the top of his lungs troubled him further.

“Have you noticed that (Y/N) has not gotten much sleep recently?” Castiel asked faintly over the car radio.

Dean reached over and turned the dial so the Classic Rock faded into the background. “What was that, Cas?” He asked.

Castiel looked up at Dean for a brief moment. “Have you noticed that (Y/N) hasn’t gotten much sleep recently?” He repeated.

Dean nodded. “I’ve started to notice that, yeah.”

He glanced over at his brother to see that his gaze was straight ahead, earbuds in. Dean sighed, slapped him on the shoulder, then returned his hand to the wheel. Sam flinched and glared at Dean as he removed a bud from his left ear.

“Dude, what?” He asked, offense obvious in his tone.

“Have you noticed (Y/N)’s been losing sleep a lot?”

Sam furrowed his brows and glanced in the backseat at Castiel and (Y/N). “You know, now that you mention it, I have.”

Castiel hummed lightly, eyes still attached to (Y/N). The confirmation from his friends gave him some comfort. “I’m beginning to worry about him,” he admitted. “He’s awoken from numerous nightmares as of late.”

“That’s normal for hunters, Cas,” Sam said.

“Not for (Y/N). He has never had this many before.”

“Have you tried talking to him about it?”

“I have, but he never wants to tell me about them. He only ever tells me they’re hunting dreams, but…”

“You think he’s lying?”

Castiel’s silence answered for him.

“Look, Cas,” Dean began. “Nightmares, to hunters, are a bit of a touchy subject. We see a lot of things in the field and our everyday lives, and (Y/N)’s been through a lot. Maybe (Y/N) doesn’t want to worry you. I think he’ll come around eventually.” 

“You believe so?”

Dean shrugged. “I don’t know. Probably.”

Sam rolled his eyes and scoffed as he put his earbuds back inside. Dean shot him a look.

“What?” Dean asked.

Sam shook his head. “Nothing.”

Dean grumbled under his breath before he peered in the rearview mirror. “Look, (Y/N) loves you, Cas, more than anything - trust me, he’s told me more times than I can count. If there’s anyone he would go to about this problem, it would be you. Just give him time.”

Time.

Castiel was a patient man under normal circumstances, but when it came to his partner, he found that his patience wore thin quite easily if he was in distress. Castiel never liked to see (Y/N) unhappy, and it made his heart ache when he felt he couldn’t do anything to help. How he wished he could take the pain away. How he wished he knew where to start.

(Y/N) let out a soft whimper, brows furrowed tightly, and Castiel cast him a saddened expression. He reached over and softly pulled him closer so that his head rested against Castiel’s chest. While he knew Dean was right, one thing’s for certain;

Castiel hated waiting.

*~*

“We’re on Easy Street,

And it feels so sweet.

‘Cause the world is but a treat

When you’re on Easy Street.”

(Y/N) groaned and leaned his head back against the wall as the song repeated for, what seemed like the hundredth time. A faint laugh could be heard from across the room, but the darkness that surrounded him left him completely blind. He knew it was Lucifer, though. He could tell.

“Come on, cheer up!” Lucifer said. “It’s a catchy tune!”

It was the first time in a while that (Y/N) didn’t feel terrified while he dreamt. In Lucifer’s unorthodox method of torture, he had rather grown quite annoyed. He knew it was Lucifer’s way of getting under his skin, and he was doing a fantastic job at it. It wasn’t long before the short song came to an end, then repeated. Again. (Y/N) let out a frustrated shout and buried his face in his hands.

Suddenly, the lights flickered on and revealed the gray, dull, concrete room that they were in. (Y/N) clenched his eyes shut before he removed his hands from his face to look over at Lucifer, who paced around the room rhythmically as he snapped his fingers to the beat of the song. The music mixed with the bright lights and Lucifer’s arrogant face caused the bottom of (Y/N)’s eye to twitch. When Lucifer saw the look on his face, he snickered.

“Aw, is (Y/N) getting upset?” Lucifer teased, bottom lip pushed out in a mock pout.

“I will castrate you.” (Y/N) deadpanned.

Lucifer hissed. “You know, I don’t think you can do that.”

“I’ll find a way.”

Lucifer let out a loud, boisterous laugh that reverberated off the walls. (Y/N) shook his head and crossed his arms over his chest. Once the laughter died down, Lucifer stared at him intently, uncomfortably so. He lifted a hand and snapped his fingers. The music stopped. Then, it was silent. They stared at one another. Neither broke eye contact. Lucifer tilted his head to the side, and (Y/N) was partially convinced it was Castiel in that body, but he knew better.

“This isn’t working,” he sighed.

Yep, still Lucifer.

“I say you cut your losses.” (Y/N) grumbled.

“I’ll take that into consideration.”

Lucifer tapped his chin and he began to study the stone walls around them. (Y/N) furrowed his brows. There wasn’t much to study. They were just walls. Concrete walls that looked new, as if they had been constructed mere hours propr, and expertly as well. A single light fixture was placed in the center of the ceiling with a bulb bright enough to attract moths from miles away. The room was rather uncreative. Unoriginal. (Y/N) needed to start constructing better landscapes for his dreams.

“I got it!” Lucifer’s voice broke through the silence.

With the snap of his fingers, the room vanished and was replaced by a darker, dimmer setting. A small, abandoned warehouse that appeared as if it should have been demolished decades prior. Broken glass and metal beams littered the filthy floor. The only source of light came from the moonbeams that shined through the shattered windows. He took a moment to stand from his spot as his eyes scanned his surroundings. Lucifer had, again, vanished. He didn’t hold his breath, though, for he knew he wouldn’t be gone long.

“You know me so well,” a voice came from behind.

(Y/N) whipped around and came face-to-face with Lucifer. The real Lucifer. Not the one who hid behind Castiel’s face. With Castiel’s appearance gone, (Y/N) didn’t feel as much hesitation as he had before. All he felt was irritation. Annoyance. His jaw clenched, fists balled up at his sides. Lucifer smirked as he reached behind him and pulled a long blade out. He walked over and held the hilt out to him. (Y/N) took the blade and examined it intently.

“An Archangel Blade?” He questioned.

Lucifer shrugged nonchalantly. “I figured I’d tortured you long enough. You might as well get your revenge.”

(Y/N) narrowed his eyes suspiciously. “You want me to kill you.”

“It’s not gonna kill me. That would be stupid of me to give you something that would get rid of me, don’t you think?”

“Then I’m not interested.”

“Aw, why not? You know you want to.”

“Nope.”

“Please?”

“No.”

“Not even a little cut?”

“No! Now fuck off,” (Y/N) waved him off as he turned on his heel and walked away.

Lucifer’s jaw dropped in shock. He was quick to follow. “So, what? You’re just going to throw away your one opportunity to get revenge even when I serve it to you on a silver platter!?”

Lucifer reached out and grabbed (Y/N)’s shoulder. It was almost instinctual, the way (Y/N) tightened his hold on the hilt, the way he turned at a speed no human should have to face him, the way he grasped Lucifer’s shoulder with an iron grip, and the way the Archangel Blade seamlessly plunged into his stomach was almost a surreal experience. Then, there was silence. Nothing moved, nothing blinked, nothing breathed. It was as if he were part of a photograph or a television show that had been left on pause. Slowly, (Y/N) closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and let it out.

Play.

“This is why you should never let your guard down.” (Y/N) said, eased the blade out of Lucifer’s (?) stomach, and took a step back.

That was when he saw them. The eyes. His heart stopped. Baby blues. Deep blues. The ocean. Wandering sea. Hurt. Sorrow. Betrayal. Death. The sea is dying. No one can stop it.

Castiel.

Castiel gripped the wound in his gut as he stumbled back. In an instant, his eyes rolled into the back of his head and he collapsed. Under his back, a deep, black imprint of angel wings got singed into the concrete. (Y/N) stared at the scene before him, mouth agape, eyes wide, heart still frozen in time. The blade dropped to the ground as if it wanted to part from his shaky hand.

“Cas?” He barely registered his voice as he stumbled down onto his knees beside his body.

He could feel the tears flow down his cheeks and he watched them methodically drop onto his trenchcoat. The sobs built up inside, but were unable to escape, caught in the back of his throat. He used one hand to caress Castiel’s cold, rough cheek. Just as the cries rattled in his chest, a smirk spread across Castiel’s chapped lips and his gaze darted toward (Y/N).

“What happened to not letting your guard down?” Lucifer mused.

(Y/N) let out a loud shout that echoed in the empty building. He fell back and began to crawl away. Lucifer cackled maniacally and stood. The wound in his chest began to close as he stepped closer.

“I don’t know why I never thought of that before! To make you take down the one thing, the one person that means the most to you. But, now that I’ve got you right where I want you, we’re going to have so…much…fun…”

*~*

“Agent Bermudez.”

…

…

“Agent Bermudez?”

…

…

“Agent!”

(Y/N) jumped slightly as he was pulled out of his trance. The cup, that held scalding hot coffee, in his hand jostled, but thankfully the contents remained in the glass. His eyes shot over to the sound of the voice. Dean and Sam stared at him expectedly. It took him a moment to realize that they had been talking to him.

“Uh, um, yes D-Agent?” He corrected himself.

Sam and Dean shared a look before their gaze returned to him. Sam cleared his throat.

“Did you have any more questions for Mrs. Calloway about her husband?” He asked.

It was then that he realized the middle-aged widow had been sat there the whole time. They were in her living room. In her house. The gears creaked in his brain as he attempted to figure out what had happened. When he caught on, he sat up quickly and placed the cup on a coaster that sat on the coffee table between the four of them.

We’re on a case, (Y/N). Get your shit together.

“Um, no, no I don’t.”

The brothers nodded before they turned back to Mrs. Calloway. They stood from the couch, and (Y/N) clumsily followed.

“Thank you so much for taking the time to talk to us, Mrs. Calloway. You’ve been very helpful,” Sam said with a small, sympathetic smile as he reached into his breast pocket and pulled out one of his faux business cards. “Give me a call if you can think of anything else.”

Mrs. Calloway took the card with a smile that mirrored Sam’s. “Thank you, agents. I appreciate you taking this so seriously. David would be grateful. Don’t burn yourself out over it, though. I know how much of a toll this job takes on you.” As she spoke, her eyes were trained on (Y/N).

(Y/N) flashed a small, albeit embarrassed, grin and gave a brief wave. Sam and Dean turned to leave as (Y/N) trailed behind. They let themselves out through the front door and back into the promotional poster for suburban America. Compared to the white and blue colonials with SUVs and Minivans parked in each driveway, the Impala stood out as a historic relic. Once they closed the door, the brothers looked over at (Y/N), each of them sporting their own look with Dean’s of slight annoyance and Sam’s of concern.

“What the Hell was that?” Dean asked, exasperated.

(Y/N) shook his head. “I don’t know. I just zoned out.”

“Yeah, we can tell,” Sam said. “What’s been going on recently?”

“Nothing, I’m fine,” (Y/N) said, although he wasn’t too convinced himself.

“No, you’re not fine!” Dean said. “Look, Cas told us about the nightmares. I get how they are, but these seem to be getting to you. Bad.”

“I said ‘I’m fine’.”

“You’re obviously not, and until you are, I think it would be best if you sat this one out.”

“Dean’s right,” Sam agreed. “He and I can do this one on our own. We’ve done it before. You need to get better.”

“You’re benching me?” (Y/N) growled.

“Yes.” Dean nodded sternly. “Until you’re better, that would be for the best.”

(Y/N) opened his mouth to rebuttal, but knew it would be futile. He clenched his jaw and stormed over to the Impala. He opened the back passenger door, sat inside with a huff, and slammed the door shut. Sam sighed and ran his fingers through his hair stressfully while Dean shook his head. 

“He’s getting bad,” Dean mumbled.

“Yeah, I’ve never seen him like that before. He needs some rest.” Sam said.

“Right, we don’t need him getting himself killed.”

“Cas wouldn’t like that very much.”

“No, he wouldn’t.”

“We still need to interview the employees at the bookstore. You can drop me off there and take (Y/N) back to the motel.”

“No, I’ll go to the bookstore, you drive him to the motel.”

“Why me?”

“Because he’s more likely to talk to you about it. You might even get him to talk to Cas about it.”

Sam gave a small nod. “For once, I agree with you. You suck at empathy.”

“Oh, bite me,” Dean grumbled. “Just get in the damn car.”

*~*

The bookstore sat three miles from the motel. Once they dropped Dean off, (Y/N) moved to the passenger’s seat - much to his dismay - and Sam shifted to the driver’s. At first, the two were silent while Van Halen hummed calmly over the speakers. (Y/N)’s arms rested at his side, head hung down, eyes half-lidded. Sam glanced over at him now and again as he drove through the middle of the small downtown. It was from the occasional peak that Sam truly saw how exhausted he was. The skin under his eyes was dark and heavy, eyes bloodshot. His body slouched, and it appeared as if he could fall asleep in an instant.

“Cas is worried about you, you know.” Sam broke the silence.

“Why?” (Y/N) furrowed his brows.

“Because of these nightmares you’ve been having. Hell, Dean and I are just as worried as he is.”

“I’m fine.”

“See, you say that, but I think the only person you’re trying to convince is yourself.”

(Y/N) looked down at his lap and began to fiddle with his hands.

“We care about you,” Sam continued. “And we hate seeing you like this.”

Sam made a right turn into the motel lot and parked in the vacant spot in front of their door.

“How did you deal with it?” (Y/N) whispered.

Sam looked over at him. “Deal with what?” 

“Lucifer.”

Sam hesitated. “Is that what your nightmares have been about?”

(Y/N) could only nod.

“How long has this been going on?”

“Since a couple of months after we got Cas back. No matter how hard I try, he won’t leave me alone. It’s like he’s really there.” (Y/N)’s voice became shaky and tears streamed down his face. 

Sam reached over, placed a gentle hand on (Y/N)’s shoulder, and gave it a light squeeze. “I’m sorry. I’ve been there before. It’s horrible…you need to tell Cas.”

“I can’t. I don’t want him to worry.”

“He’s already worried, (Y/N), and you’re getting worse by the day. You need to talk to him.”

“I don’t want him to blame himself.”

“Why would he blame himself?”

“Because Lucifer is always in Cas’ body.”

Sam raised his brows and sighed. When Lucifer used Castiel’s vessel as his own, it was tough on all of them, but he knew it was especially difficult on (Y/N). For Sam, it was difficult to see his friend a prisoner in his own body, he couldn’t imagine how hard it must’ve been for (Y/N). To see the face of your lover worn as a mask by an Archangel that tormented the people that you loved? ‘Hard’ must’ve been too light of a word.

“Listen, you know Cas would never do whatever Lucifer is doing to you.” 

(Y/N) sniffled and nodded. “I know, I know. It’s just that it keeps reminding me of when I didn’t have Cas…and Lucifer was horrible when he took over his vessel and I just hated seeing him like that. I wanna forget that it even happened.”

“I know,” Sam rubbed his shoulder comfortingly. “But I think Cas’ll understand.”

“You think so?”

“I think so.” Sam smiled over at him.

(Y/N) reached up and wiped the tears from his cheeks.

“Tell you what,” Sam said. “Why don’t you go in and lay down? I’ll give Cas a call and have him come over.”

“Don’t tell him.”

“I won’t, but you need to. If you don’t, then I will.”

(Y/N) looked over at Sam before he gave a nod. Sam reached into his pocket and pulled out the spare room key, which (Y/N) graciously took.

“Get some sleep, okay?” Sam spoke softly.

“I will. Goodnight, Sam,” (Y/N) mumbled, got out of the car, walked to the door, and entered the room.

*~*

Please, make it stop.

The warehouse was the same as in his previous dream. Still old, still dilapidated. The only difference was the large array of angel wings burnt meticulously into the floor. There was no blood, no gore, no bodies strewn about to remind him of what he did. He didn’t need the extra detail, Lucifer knew that. The wings were more than enough.

No more, please.

“And, again!” Lucifer exclaimed.

No!

(Y/N) gripped the angel blade tight in his hand, despite his mental protests. Castiel appeared in front of him, blue eyes pleading. He wasted no time as he drove the angel blade into his chest. Onto the floor, he fell like a ragdoll and a new etching of wings joined the bunch. He breathed.

It was a vicious cycle.

“Again!”

Command. Kill. Breathe.

“Again!” 

Command. Kill. Breathe.

“Again!”

Command. Kill. Breathe.

“Again!”

Command.

Kill.

Breathe.

He collapsed onto his knees. The angel blade slipped from his grasp and skidded across the floor. His eyes were so wide he was half certain they would burst from the sockets, lips parted to allow the heavy breaths of air to flow. Lucifer’s deep chuckle sounded in his ears as he stepped closer and knelt in front of him. Lucifer lifted his chin so their eyes connected. 

“Good,” he smirked. “You’ve come a long way, my dear hunter.”

Fuck you.

“Thank you, Lucifer,” (Y/N)’s voice sounded fake and robotic.

Lucifer hummed and pursed his lips. “I still hear a little defiance in that head of yours. Perhaps we should keep going.”

No! Please!

“Of course, Lucifer.” 

(Y/N) stood on shaky legs and made his way to the discarded weapon.

No, please, don’t do this.

“You are such a good listener, (Y/N).” Lucifer praised.

Don’t listen to him! Stop!

(Y/N) picked up the blade and held it with a death grip.

Put that down! You don’t have to do this!

He turned so he faced Lucifer, back straight, head held high.

Command.

No!

Kill.

Please!

Breathe.

I’ll do anything!

Lucifer smirked.

“Again!”

*~*

“No!” (Y/N) let out a loud, guttural scream as he shot up from his spot on the bed.

His eyes were red from the tears that stained his cheeks, and his chest moved up and down with the efforts of his breathing. When he felt a hand on his shoulder, he jerked away violently and scrambled off the bed, his legs weak and barely able to hold his weight.

“No, please,” (Y/N) leaned against the wall to keep himself upright. He had his palms pressed against his ears, eyes shut tight.

“(Y/N)? (Y/N), it’s me.” Castiel gently edged himself off the bed and walked over to him.

As Castiel placed his hands on (Y/N)’s shoulder, he felt his body tense.

“You’re not real. You’re not real. You’re not real.” (Y/N) repeated continuously.

Carefully, Castiel removed (Y/N)’s hands from his ears, despite the weak protests. He could feel the way his heart raced, the way his hands shook, and it hurt to see.

“Bumblebee, please,” Castiel’s voice was deep, soft, soothing. “It’s me. It’s Castiel.”

Bumblebee.

(Y/N)’s eyes shot open as he turned his head - eyes, look at the eyes. Elegant waves of blue. Sapphires. Full of worry. Full of life. Life. He was alive. Castiel was alive.

“Cas?” His voice came out hoarse.

“Yes, it’s me. You’re safe.”

Hesitantly, (Y/N) cupped his cheek. His thumb brushed against the stubble that decorated his jawline. The longer he stared into his eyes, the more he felt peace, comfort, a sense of love and longing, home. He brought Castiel close to him and embraced him tight enough that it was sure to hurt if he were human. The grip he had on him was tense as if he were convinced Castiel would vanish at any moment. Castiel returned the affection but, instead of wrapping his arms around him, he placed an arm around his back and another under his knees. He picked him up, carried him the short distance over to the bed, and laid him down. He lay next to him, their arms never retreating.

“(Y/N), please,” Castiel’s breath was warm against his ear. “I know that it wasn’t a hunting dream. Please, talk to me.”

(Y/N) was silent as he reveled in the fact that he was able to hold Castiel as close to him as he was. Alive. He took a moment to think back to the conversation he had with Sam - He’s already worried…You need to talk to him. Based on Castiel’s tone of voice, and the words he used, he knew Sam was right. He had to tell him.

“They’re about you,” (Y/N) whispered just loud enough for Castiel to hear.

At those words, Castiel pulled back ever so slightly, but never took his hands off him. He studied (Y/N)’s face and noticed the way he refused to look at him. His brows knit together in confusion and concern. He reached a hand up to caress his cheek.

“What happens in these dreams, (Y/N)?” He asked softly.

(Y/N) was hesitant to respond, a part of him terrified of the guilt Castiel could potentially feel, another scared at the mere idea of mentioning Lucifer’s name aloud. What if he wasn’t truly gone? What if he heard him? Would he find him? Would he kill him? Would the nightmares he had dealt with for the past several months come true? He knew he had to reveal the source of the dreams, though. Not only for his sake but for Castiel’s as well.

“It’s never really you in the dreams. It’s always Lucifer inside your vessel. He started by teasing me, mocking me, and then…he started to torture me. It was stupid shit at first, stuff that didn’t really hurt me. Then he brought you into the picture.” (Y/N)’s voice began to shake as tears appeared in the corner of his eyes, a result of recalling the events of his nightmares and exhaustion. “He made me kill you, Cas.”

Castiel was quick to pull him back into his arms. He brought their bodies so close together that it was as if they were one. At the warmth he felt wrapped around his body, (Y/N) finally let himself cry. Hard.

“And I try to stop him,” (Y/N) sobbed. “I try so hard, but nothing I do seems to work, and I have to kill you over and over and over again and he won’t let me go. I know he’s not there, but he feels so real.”

Castiel shushed him gently as his hand rubbed his back soothingly. They simply held each other as (Y/N) let out all the sadness, pain, and frustration he had kept in for the longest time. With each cry, with each shake of his body, Castiel felt himself break. The man he loved, the man who stole his heart, sat shattered in his arms, and he felt responsible.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered into his ear between sobs.

(Y/N) shook his head. “It’s not your fault, I knew you would do that.” His voice was broken and shaky.

“I let Lucifer in.”

“But you couldn’t control his actions. Lucifer is to blame, not you. I could never blame you.”

“But if I would’ve-”

“Lucifer would have found a way, we both know this.”

By then, his cries had mellowed out to mere sniffles and hiccups with the occasional stray tear. They spent the next several minutes holding one another, silent. The room started to get dark as the sun set, and (Y/N) couldn’t help but wonder where the brothers were. How they were doing on the hunt. He hoped his debilitating exhaustion hadn’t cost them any valuable time or extra hands they may have needed. It wasn’t long before Castiel spoke once more.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” He asked.

“I didn’t want you to blame yourself. I knew you would. There isn’t anything you can do about it anyway. I thought I could get it under control.”

Castiel paused before he pulled back. “Maybe I can. May I try something?”

(Y/N) hesitated before he shook his head. “I don’t want to go back to sleep, Cas,” he said, voice laced with uncertainty.

“Trust me, Bumblebee, please? I believe I know how I can help.”

(Y/N) sighed. Despite everything he told himself, he was exhausted. He had been for the past several weeks, and the strength he previously used to keep himself awake had all but faded. He didn’t want to have another nightmare, but if Castiel could help him, he had to give him a chance. (Y/N) gave Castiel a quick peck on the lips.

“I trust you.”

Castiel smiled warmly. He nuzzled his nose against (Y/N)’s and grabbed the comforter. He draped it over their bodies. He shifted so their legs were tangled together, wrapped his arms around (Y/N)’s waist, and rested his forehead against his. He began to rub his back in small, slow circles, and (Y/N) could feel his body instantly relax.

“Get some sleep, Bumblebee. I promise I’ll keep you safe. I love you.” Castiel whispered, and his words alone sounded like a lullaby.

“I love you, too, Cas. So much.” (Y/N) mumbled back.

With the warmth of Castiel’s embrace, (Y/N) was quick to drift off once more with a new hope of content slumber.

*~*

Nothing. That was the best word he could use to describe where he was. It wasn’t dark, nor was it light. It wasn’t a basic abandoned warehouse, nor was it a location embedded in his memory. It was simply and utterly nothing. Although the implication of ‘nothing’ meant the absence of ‘something’. The question was: what was missing?

“Bumblebee?”

(Y/N)’s head perked up at the nickname. He began to look around but found no source. There was still nothing.

“I’m here, (Y/N).”

As he turned around, he was blinded by a bright light. He squinted and shielded his eyes. From the light, a heat radiated off of it and surrounded him like a blanket. He felt the urge to go to it as if a rope had wrapped itself around his waist and begun to pull. When he walked, he floated. His legs didn’t move. It was unknown what waited beyond the light, but whatever it was made him feel safe, loved, and wanted. Soon, the light engulfed him, and he was blinded once more.

When his vision was restored, he was welcomed to a sight he had never witnessed before. Yellow, sandy beaches surrounded by a deep blue ocean. The sun seemed to sit where it barely kissed the distant waves, giving the sky an orangish pink tone. In front of him sat a pier, one that he was no stranger to, yet he had only seen in movies and television shows. ‘Pacific Park’ was inscribed into the archway of the entrance. Behind it sat various theme park rides, all small in size, but worth the experience.

“(Y/N)?”

(Y/N) turned to his right to see Castiel, a small smile on his lips. He was uncertain at first, but once he saw the brilliance in his eyes, he relaxed and mirrored his smile. 

“Cas,” he breathed, reached over, and took his hand. “Is this the Santa Monica Pier?”

Castiel looked up at the archway and nodded. “I’ve been here once during my exploration of Earth, and you mentioned that you had never been here before.”

(Y/N) shook his head and pursed his lips. “I think I’ve only been to California a handful of times, most of which were up North near Red Bluff.” He said. “But why are we here?”

Castiel gave his hand a gentle squeeze and began to lead him down the pier. Unlike the true Santa Monica beaches, these were barren. Not a single soul resided on the pier or beach besides (Y/N) and Castiel. It would have been an eerie experience had it not been for the sound of the roaring sea.

“Your nightmares focused on memories, or memories of how Lucifer was, correct?”

“Right?”

“Well, I figured the best way to rid you of those memories is to create new ones while you dream.”

(Y/N) couldn’t stop the grin that spread across his lips. “Like a date?”

“Yes. A date.”

“So, what? You’re going to take me on a date every time I dream now?”

“If that’s what it takes to stop the nightmares and allow you to get some sleep then we will have dates every night while you dream for the rest of your life.”

(Y/N) stopped in his tracks and slowly pulled back on Castiel’s hand. Castiel looked back at him and tilted his head ever so slightly. (Y/N) grabbed Castiel’s other hand, brought both of them up to his lips, and kissed his knuckles.

“Castiel, you are the best boyfriend that anyone could ever ask for. I don’t deserve you.” He said.

“No, Bumblebee. You deserve the world. I would love to give it to you.”

(Y/N) reached up and cupped Castiel’s cheek. “I have my world right here.”

He pressed his forehead against Castiel’s. Their noses brushed against one another, then they kissed. It was short and sweet, but it held all their love and passion behind it. When they parted, they stared deeply at each other. 

“I love you, Cas.”

“I love you, too, (Y/N).”

(Y/N) beamed and dropped one of Castiel’s hands. He began to drag him towards the theme park rides.

“Now, come on! I’ve always wanted to ride these!”

Castiel followed at an even pace behind him, and he couldn’t help but feel the guilt and pain that had built up inside of him wash away. To see his partner shine with happiness was an experience he would not soon forget. He made it his mission, from then on out, to guarantee that every dream (Y/N) had would be just as wonderful, if not better, than the last. For, as long as they were together, Castiel pledged that nightmares would be a thing of the past, never to plague the mind of his beloved until the end of his days. 

[naturecalls111]

I wrote this on twitter but I thought I'd put it here too, since I occasionally get asks on how I draw/any tips I might have. On twitter I also made the caveat that I don't feel I'm qualified to give anyone tips, LOL, but I was drawing today for an assignment and felt like this is worth noting to any beginner artists who have a tendency of clinging onto sketches that they feel like they finally got right! (A.K.A, a habit I still have years later HA!) This isn't so much of a tutorial as expressing my thought process in this discovery of how to draw more dynamic pieces. I found it to be satisfying on my end, seeing it unravel, so hopefully it can help someone who may be struggling with the same thing I am.

MAKING MORE DYNAMIC PIECES, A PERSONAL STUDY!:

I wasn't upset by this drawing, but I could tell there was something stagnant about it so I ended up pushing it and redrawing it a million times to see if I could somehow make it look more dynamic.

Here's one part of the timelapse - I'm clearly adamant on trying to make this pose/composition work but while the sketch itself may look better, the stagnation hasn't changed. Perhaps this works for some people, but anyone seeking a dynamic visual will be able to spot that this simply isn't working as anything more than a semi-decent anatomy study attempting to be applied.

I changed the position of both arms, I tried to play around with the angle of the head, I tried to just the hips forward more so that the spine had increased curvature, but the main issue, really, was that the initial composition lacked the dynamism in general. It prioritised dramaticism over dynamism. Both can exist in the same piece - it did not, in this one.

This was the new sketch I started with. Less rigid base to go off of. Just getting down the general shape I wanted to score - make the spine and tail take a sort of mid-whip path, shoulders hunched, hips cant forwards, as if he's curling in on himself. I think for a dynamic piece, it's more helpful that your initial sketch uses the body as a general marker as opposed to something to do lineart over (granted, I don't really do lineart anyway, my sketch is usually the extent of my "lineart", but since this is just looking at creating a more dynamic composition, I think it still applies!)

Here it's the same principle. For the left image (the legs) I've established where the knee of the right leg goes, and where the hip that precedes the left leg will sit. These are just base anatomical structures that help me figure out 1. Whether or not the mere idea of this composition will work, and 2. where I have to stop once I start drawing. For me, having some sort of limitation for the body helps me stay within range of proportionate anatomy (not that I particularly care for the anatomy to be realistic, just proportionate to the style I'm drawing in)

On the right image is also the same principle. Establishing the movement of the arm, the elbow/arm bend, and the hand. (If you see the full sketch before the two above, I established the hand in that one too - it really is helpful figuring out the placement of the hand ahead of time.) If it looks atrocious afterwards I always have the lasso tool/eraser to save me.

The new attempt brings me to this. While preference in art is subjective, I do think I'd be staying in SOME realm of objectivity when I say this is more dynamic than my initial sketch, LOL. Of course, lighting/rendering choices help push the composition a little more, but this achieves what I couldn't do with that first sketch. I had a general idea, but it's important to know when to let go of something that clearly isn't working.

Would love for anyone to add their own tips or ideas to this post - I'm not particularly known for dynamic pieces so I'm always looking to learn. This was a really valuable study for me so I wanted to share it, but everyone has their own method and what works for me may not work for the next person!

There's a few other asks that asked me for tips on general anatomy, and more specifically legs (oh dear god, I'M going to need to study for that before writing out any sort of resource guide for that, lol) that I hope to get around to doing in the near future. Thank you for your guys' vote of confidence, haha! ❤️

[heavenlycloud]

sharing a bed: le sserafim x 6th member fem! reader

warnings: crying, swearing, nightmares

when you and your members found out that you were going to be going to the states for a tour you all were stoked. american fans had been begging for nearly a year and finally there were tour dates for an american leg of a world tour. the first stop was new york which yunjin in particular was looking forward to since it'd been almost two years since she'd seen her family in person. originally the plan was for her to sleep at her family's house then you all meet back up as a group two days later for the first stage rehearsals. that being said you and the other girls were planning to just stay in a hotel, two to a room then someone gets a solo room. however, when one of yunjin's family members got sick, plans changed and she couldn't go home for risk of also catching the illness. all of which resulted in you having to share a room with one of your members. the only issue is you have a MASSIVE crush on your now roommate, and you two have to share a bed for the next two days....

sakura

you laid stiff as a board in the queen sized hotel bed, nearly falling off the edge because you wanted that much space between the two of you

beneath the covers you were sweating and hoping that she couldn't feel you shaking beside her

but she could because you were shaking like a wet chihuahua arms length away from her

it was already nearing two in the morning and both of you needed sleep but the jet lag was absolutely no help

you held onto the blankets in an absolute death grip, hoping that you wouldn't move closer to her in your sleep

jokes on you because you did in fact move- so much so that you woke up face to face with sakura

your lips were almost touching which jumpscared you awake, causing you to fall off the bed and take ALL the sheets and blankets with you

sakura was woken up by this and didn't add to your nerves when she told you, "come back up here. i want to feel you near me again."

chaewon

you put up a wall of pillows between the two of you with the shitty excuse of 'so we have equal room'

chaewon literally didn't care if the pillows were there or not so she found it strange that you insisted on keeping them there

she turned to ask you a question and was met face to face with this giant feather stuffed pillow

the pillow wall not only seperated the two of you but also made it hard to hear one another talk

so you were literally sitting there nearly shouting to one another when you knew you had to be quiet because eunchae and kazuha were sleeping next door

*whisper yelling* "what did you say?!" "huh?!" "i said what did you- *loudly* y/n this is so stupid."

chaewon ended up getting annoyed that the pillows were in her way so she threw them aside

you decided that everything would be fine as long as you lay back to her

that fell through when you woke up to her spooning you from behind which sent your heartrate through the roof before you could open both eyes fully in the morning

yunjin

the two of you had never shared a bed before for this specific reason

you weren't really sure if it was the melatonin gummy your manager made you all eat that caused you to be calmer than normal but you weren't blushing and kicking your feet at every glimpse you got of her for once

not sure who's bright idea it was but the hotel a/c unit was on full blast with no way of turning it down lower

you and yunjin were laying in bed freezing cold but you were NOT about to make the first move for 'im cold ur cold' cuddles

yunjin offered multiple times and you refused

*sniff* '"y/n, you can come closer if you're cold" "no i'm good" "you sure?" "mhm" "okay"

and then fifteen minutes passed and yunjin swore if she heard you sniffle one more time she was going to literally punch you in the nose- "for the love of god. y/n come here."

and that's how you ended up hugging each other like two people freezing to death in the arctic

it would have been cute if yunjin didn't kick in her sleep

you woke up with bumps and bruises on your legs and bags under your eyes because you didn't sleep well...but she did

"wow i slept great last night didn't you?" and you're just standing there with one eye open, a bedhead, and a limp.

kazuha

the two of you were up late and you were just listening to everything kazuha wanted to say

your japanese was spotty but you did your best to follow because you wanted to make sure that she knew you were listening, and you wanted her to know her voice was always heard

she would finish talking about one thing and skip to the next until she ran out of things to say and that weird silence hangs over the two of you

"are you ready to sleep now?" "yeah, goodnight."

you're not sure how long you're sleeping before you stir awake to kazuha moving around next to you

suddenly she's breathing harder and wakes up with a scream that thankfully nobody else heard in the rooms around you both

your hands are already on her back and you're soothing softly, "it's okay, it's okay. zuha it's just me, it's just me. just breathe...you're with me, it's just us. just you and me, me and you."

when she's calm again you lay back down you feel her hand slowly slip into yours

no words exchanged, there's no need. just the feeling of you both knowing that you're there for one another.

[xsweetcatastrophe]

You Broke Me First

Part 17

Zoe had a smile on her face from the second she got that text from Cillian, all throughout the hot shower she took, picking out clothes, getting dressed, picking up coffee and driving to work.

She picked out a white sleeveless bodysuit with structured shoulders, black pleated dress pants and some mules. She put on her gold bracelets that her grandmother passed down to her when she died (they were in her jewelry box collecting dust) and put on some gold necklaces and earrings. Instead of straightening her hair or putting it in a messy bun like usual, she decided to add some product to it and let it stay wavy, blow drying it upside down and scrunching it so it had volume. Zoe's hair was naturally very wavy and normally she hated it, but she decided to embrace it today.

I look like a lion, she thought to herself as she took one final look in the mirror.

Zoe arrived at work and walked in with her head held high. She walked down the long hallway towards her office, past the cubicles of junior writers that once stared her down. She felt confident, she felt happy, she felt wanted. Cillian had transformed her entire mood. If she knew one blackout night and a sloppy facetime call to him would change everything, she would of done this a long time ago.

She closed her office door, set her bag and coffee down, and sat at her desk. First things first - music. She opened her spotify and shuffled her "liked songs" playlist.

She took out her notebook and opened to the most recent page. She always made a "to do" list for the following day at the end of her day. Since she didn't get anything done on Monday, she wanted to speed through her to do list for Monday and play catch up for today:

Monday:

schedule Emma Stone interview- get talking points and questions

try and get contact info for wardrobe assistant for Poor Things - check with Casey from accounting?? cousin was a PA on set or something??

follow up with editor for Cill article --- where is it haven't had any feedback in weeks?????

see if can get invite for new PR firm party next month - Jlo should be there with Ben

speaking of ben - see if i can get a contact for jennifer garner, want to do segment for her Pretend Cooking Show and possibly do ina Garten collab -- pitch to Donna first

Zoe didn't get a chance to get started on anything before there was a knock on the door.

"Come in-" Zoe started, but the person had walked in anyway. "Oh, hey Mia"

Mia was one of the junior writers at Zoe's job. She latched onto Zoe as a mentor and always asked her to proofread her articles and, in turn, became somewhat close to Zoe.

Mia closed the door and sat down in the chair across from Zoe.

"Something is going on and you're not telling me" Mia said.

"What do you mean?"

"You seem... happier... well no shit, you're dating a movie star, I bet you jetted off to San Tropez for the weekend and spent it on a yacht" Mia said.

"Mia, you couldn't be more wrong" Zoe said, laughing while reminiscing of her spilling out of the dive bar Sunday night. Not exactly San Tropez.

"Ugh, I hate you so much," Mia said, leaning back into the chair and looking up at the ceiling. "How does it feel to be the envy of every girl ever?"

"Oh, stop it" Zoe said, rolling her eyes.

"Zo, you're dating Tommy Shelby. Girls have wet dreams about being with Tommy Shelby."

"I'm not dating Thomas Shelby" Zoe said, rolling her eyes.

"He still has the haircut. So at least you can pretend" Mia pointed out.

"Do you need help with something?" Zoe said, half jokingly and half serious. She felt uncomfortable talking about her relationship with Cillian, mainly because she still didn't feel comfortable lying about it. She rather avoid the entire topic all together.

"Just tell me one thing, please" Mia said, leaning forward in her chair, elbows on her knees and lowering her voice, "Is the sex good at least? Tell me it's mind blowing"

Couldn't tell ya, Mia, Zoe thought.

"Its... it's indescribable" Zoe settled on. Not exactly a lie, right? You can't describe what you don't remember.

"Ugh, I bet!" Mia said, standing up. "I'll tell you one thing" She continued as she walked towards the office door, "If he ever comes to visit you and I'm alone with him the elevator, i can't make promises I won't keep my hands to myself" She said, sticking her tongue out.

"You're a creep, close my door" Zoe said, rolling her eyes.

Before the door could click shut, it swung open again.

"Hi Honey!" Donna said dramatically, walking in.

"Hey Donna" Zoe smiled sweetly.

"Listen, sweetie, about your Cillian article," Donna paused, "I think it's best if we shelf it for the time being."

Zoe was heartbroken. "What???" why? it's with the editors, I was actually going to follow up so I can get it to publishing"

"Actually, I pulled it from the editors last week and it's been with me on my desk all this time" Donna said, looking out the windows behind Zoe's desk.

"What? why?" Zoe asked again.

"I just think... We, the partners feel that with your current 'relationship' status that an article written by you about him wouldn't exactly go over well" she stated.

"So it's a dead interview?" All that work for nothing. She's in a fake relationship because of this interview! well.... not fake feelings... I think.. Zoe thought, started to spiral.

"We are thinking about how to proceed, we might shelf it, or we might re-do the piece with Cynthia conducting the interview instead"

Zoe saw red. "Donna" She started

"Oh Zoe don't start. Enough with this rivalry. You need to bury this" Donna said, walking towards the door. "Again, no decision has been met yet, I just wanted to keep you posted. Lets do lunch later this week sweetie, i'll see you later" She said, leaving just as fast as she arrived.

Zoe sat there in silence, trying to figure out how she felt about those two interactions.

On one hand, she liked that she was the envy of the females, according to Mia. Even though it's technically a contract relationship, the feelings are real... right? right.

As for the piece... that flat out pissed her off. Cynthia and Zoe got hired at the same time, but where Zoe had to show a lengthy portfolio of articles she's done, Cynthia's father "donated" new Mac computers to the entire building. Her heart wasn't in the storytelling part of journalism, she wanted to be close to celebrities and be one. Granted, Zoe was the one who was now dating one..... but Zoe didn't intend for that to happen. Cynthia tries to date everyone she interviews - what if she makes a move on Cillian??? No, she wouldn't. She knew they were in a relationship... right?

Zoe threw her pen on her desk and leaned back in her chair. This day started off so promising, so positive and happy, and now she had a knot in her chest.

Just then, her phone went off, a text.

From Cillian.

Dinner tonight? your place? unless you're sick of me xx

Zoe smiled.

-My to do list got cut in half, i'm leaving here at 4. Gonna stop at the store first, meet at my place at 5? -sounds good love. xx

Okay, that's something to look forward to I guess. Zoe thought. She'll pick up a bottle of wine and relax with her boyfriend.

Her boyfriend.... her"boyfriend"? Her contractually obligated boyfriend?

Cillian. She'll relax with Cillian.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Zoe pulled up to her apartment to Cillian sitting on the front steps. She parked and hopped out of the car carrying the bottle of wine.

"Hey you" Cillian said, standing up and immediately pulling her into a kiss. "You look absolutely beautiful."

"Thank you" Zoe smiled. She looked behind him on the steps and noticed the pizza box. "Pizza night?" She asked.

"Yea, I didn't know what to get last minute, and didn't want to show up empty handed, and I figured it's a safe bet" He said, shrugging his shoulders.

"Of course pizza is a safe bet. Lets go upstairs" She said, silently thanking god that she straightened up her apartment before she left that morning.

They went up the stairs and entered the apartment, placing the pizza and wine on the counter.

Zoe turned around, half expecting Cillian to pounce on her. She knew there was sexual frustration since last night, and she wanted to continue what they started.

But, much to her dismay, Cillian began to get the wine glasses out of the cabinet and uncork wine, pouring Zoe a glass first. He carried the pizza box and his wine to the coffee table, placing them down and sitting on the couch in front of it. He opened the pizza box before yelling back to her "Hey, can you grab napkins for us?"

Hm. okay. a little bit too domesticated for me tonight, but okay, Zoe thought, grabbing some napkins. She kicked off her shoes and sat next to him on the couch, accepting a slice from him.

They made small talk about their day, and Zoe asked how the house hunting went. Cillian's mood suddenly changed.

"It's turning into a nightmare" He said, shaking his head.

"Why?"

Cillian sighed. "because now that she signed the papers, she wants this done, like yesterday. As if she wasn't the one who dragged this out for so long. She wants me out of the house in the next couple of days or else the buyer is gonna walk away. So I need to be out of the house by Thursday"

Zoe stopped chewing. "Cillian... its literally Tuesday"

"Yea, no shit" Cillian huffed. "I found a house, put in an offer, but no way it'll be ready by Thursday. It's fine. I have my assistant looking for an airb&b for me in the meantime, but I have to board Scout, which I don't like"

Zoe had an idea.

"Well... you can stay here" Zoe said.

Cillian looked at her. "I don't know, love, I don't want to be in your way-"

"This sounds like a conversation we had last yesterday, except roles were reversed" Zoe laughed. "But I'm serious. I'm assuming all of your furniture is going to storage, correct?"

Cillian nodded. "They started today actually"

"So pack a bag for a couple of days, bring Scout, and stay here. Stay for as long as you need. I know it's not much, we have ubers here, the streetlight outside flickers all night, the hot water takes a minute to get luke warm, if you want hot you gotta wait about 5 minutes, and the walls are a little thin, but it's not that bad. And you're more than welcome here" Zoe said, standing up and heading into the kitchen.

"Are you allowed to even have pets here?" Cillian said, standing up and following her.

"Yea it's fine, there are dogs here. And this way if the house falls through, you can look for another one and not have to worry about extending the airb&b or finding a new one"

Zoe was drying her hands on the dishtowel when she felt Cillian wrap his arms around her from behind, nuzzling into her neck. "But where would I sleep?" He teased.

Zoe smiled. "Scout and I already claimed the bed. You sir are getting the couch" She teased back.

"mhmmm, and I bet you'll be on the couch with me before you fall asleep" He said, starting to kiss your neck.

Zoe rolled her head to the side, making it easier for him to kiss her neck. He squeezed her tighter in his arms, making Zoe sigh and relax into him. He suddenly stopped and spun her around; she was now facing him, nose to nose, still trapped in his arms.

"Ok," He whispered. "But you gotta let me help out"

"Help with what?" Zoe laughed. "It's not hard to manage a 900 square foot apartment, I assure you"

"I could be a pain, you could end up hating me by the time this is done" He said softly, hands traveling from her back to her hips, right where the hem of her jeans sat.

"I could handle you" Zoe responded, which prompted Cillian to raise an eyebrow and smirk.

"Alright love," He said, fingertips gently dipping into her jeans, rubbing the soft flesh of her stomach.

"You wanna play house? Lets play house."

tags: @lau219 @shopgirl6us

[oriley42]

BUCKLE IN, LOML, THIS IS GONNA BE A LONG ONE.

hi !! i'm bea, aka meekspeeks on AO3, and i have only recently managed to properly sink my teeth into House MD, being exam free and all. and, akin to any other Normal, Sane person, i immedietly went onto ao3 to cure my bone rattling depression by immersing myself in fics. any kind, people, any kind. and then i found yours.

and my GOD.

you, my dear, dear, sweet friend, are the best writer . ever, dare i say? i have downloaded your books onto my phone for easy reading when i'm... actually, when i'm doing anything. just woke up? ah, yes, the sound of birdsong and an oriley42 fic to sweeten the summer morning. about to go to bed? well, why not get comfy with an oriley42 classic. i highlight them. i seriously, seriously consider getting them tattooed to the inside of my eyelids. all of them. i am not kidding.

in fact, if i was a tech savvy bastard, which i am not (sometimes i Glance, i Peek, i even bloody Breathe in the direction of my ipad, and it restarts. same goes for my phone. and my computer), i would have made an entire new collection on my ao3 account, simply yet perfectly dubbed "oriley42: The Saga", and thus announced to the entirety of the internet my undying love for you, of which there is A LOT. you are amazing and sometimes i wonder if you're even real and not some kind of... demigod?

(i love your fics so much that i get a little e-mail every single time you upload. that's my level of devotion.)

i have never ever laughed harder at anything than i do your fics. when i add said fics to my hilson collection, i make sure that i have a section devoted to a portion of the bits i've highlighted that made me Lose My Shit. i love randomly quoting phrases to my baffled, non-house-loving friends, and even they giggle. you are a riot, my good lord, and i owe you my life.

i'm a true oriley42 expert, i've read them all. no one knows oriley42 like i know oriley42, apart from you, oriley42.

it's a fun name to type. oriley42.

anyway! this is long. my sincerest apologies. but, coming from a frazzled kid who's just finished her a levels, you kept me going through all the horrid, hasty revision that i had to conjure up out of Thin Fucking Air, by making me laugh when no one else could. thank you so much, and i look forward to any other fics that are Brewing in that Lovely Head Of Yours !!!

have a great... day, week, month, year, life !! i love you !!! <3

my buddy, my pal, my dear new bff, thank you so very much! it means the world to hear this, and I'm so deeply touched that my stories could be companion to you, especially as you fight your way through what sounds like a very difficult bit of schooling (wishing you all the success there btw!!)

to give someone Real Feelings, and most of all a Real Laugh, is my greatest aim in sharing my writing--thank you for making me feel like the frankly terrifying vulnerability of posting these stories up where any old Tom, Dickhead, or Harasser can make jackass comments is worth it, because of the chance that my words will cross paths with a kind reader like you <3

your own writing voice just here in this ask is charming and clever, and makes me once again grateful for the incredible talent and kindness the internet allows us all to connect to and enjoy (cheesy, I know, but I really do get teary thinking of all the wonderful people who draw and write and comment and reblog and contribute to these magnificently silly fictional worlds we weave together!)

I hereby grant you a Master's Degree in ORiley42 studies from the University of Internet Friends--much like my own advanced degree, it will not get you a job anywhere, but hey, it's about the joy of learning ;)

Thank you for stopping by, I hope to see you on the digital streets of House MD fan-land again!

xoxo

PS - I have soooo many hilson WIPs brewing, too many to keep straight, but I'm hoping to pick one, focus, and get it posted in the next week or two...stay tuned! 💖

[chevvy-yates]

WIP WHENEVER

got taggeg by @ouroboros-hideout. Always a big thanks <3

So, I hopefully go back into taking some pics later, as my pile of exisiting pics I can post nears to zero. But I've have a writing muse since the past three days and it's a little hard to stop it.

So today/tonight I'm going to share some new words i wrote, of course of my main ship Ryder and Thyjs as I do write both.

This is a part where they are already together for a bit and venture further into making out bit by bit.

This is the start of the chapter, where I reused some early oneshot-like text I wrote when I decided for Ryder's fragrance he uses and now I found a way to integrate it into a chapter with them:

Ryder just lit himself a cigarette and empties the last drop of good hop and malt when Thyjs comes back from bringing empty dishes into the kitchen. He places himself right next to Ryder, quickly borrows his cigarette from his mouth, takes a puff and hands it back while Ry puts the bottle onto the table. He leans back and places his right arm around his partner who leans his head onto his shoulder.  “Any wishes on what to watch?” Ry asks him as he inhales the menthol. “Nee. Just zap through.” “Gut.” Ry proceeds to bend forward, so he could drop the ash into the tray, then places the ciggy back to his mouth and grabs the remote control for his big tv screen and just zaps through the programs until they find something that was interesting enough to watch for both. 

They kept watching a documentary about the fourth Corporate War for quite a bit until Thyjs moves for a more comfortable position leaning against Ry and it’s when his nose picks up his partner’s strong perfume scent again that makes him raise his voice after a long while of silence between them. “You know, I realized a while ago, that your perfume has some light yasmine notes.”  At first Ryder blinks a few times with a rather doe look in his so ever intimidating eyes. He didn’t expect that now. “Y-you smelled the different notes of my perfume — when?” He stutters a little, raising an eyebrow in disbelief.  “Every time.” De Wit smirks a bit, his hands slowly stroking up and down his partner’s arm. Ry clears his throat but then asks in a slightly sassy tone as he turns towards him. “Okay, what else do I smell of, hmm? Can’t be only a flower.” And don’t say menthol, he thinks further to himself, lighting another cigarette.  Thyjs can see he’s more than curious about it. He leans forward. “Wait, I’m going to tell you.” Within an eye blink he is super close to him, eyes shut taking in his partner’s scent.

Thyjs had sensed it all: first the green fresh top notes like bergamot, gardenia and artemisia, then the heart notes started distracting him — sandalwood, vetiver and the most mystic of all: patchouli. Not too much but enough to have Thyjs start to think about different things than just chilling next to Ryder. But once when only the base notes were left as it's settled on Ryder's skin for a while, like now, the strong leather woody ember fragrance left eventually comes through, that starts to fuck a little too much with Thyjs' head as he always has Ryder in this godverdomme hot leather harness on mind he saw him wearing once when he went to a rave and Thyjs chose to stay at home, while they were just friends.  “I don’t think I can smell all of it, I’m no expert and it appears to be complex, but the base is really sharp and woody like a thick forest coated by recent rain.” Ryder has to smirk in response because this is exactly why he uses it. Furthermore, Thyjs adds, “But it also comes fully packed with musk and leather.” It causes Ry to shortly look up somewhere else, as he releases some smoke in the air and tries to reminisce about his own perfume he sprays onto himself each day. “I noticed it must be a very powerful, masculine one I would even dare to say is made for corporates only, but we both know you don’t like that much.”

“True.”  “Hoe dan ook, I think it smells very timeless and classy. Suits you well.” Scharfenberg is truly impressed by what a fine nose his boyfriend has and he likes it. “Any more exciting words than just it’s a classic?” Ry wants to know further. He’s really hooked by Thyjs’ description and totally aware that his perfume is not unlike any ordinary perfume. He knows it adds a certain seductiveness to him, making him appear mystic overall. “It makes you smell as sweet as jasmine in the morning but also as spicy as cinnamon as the day goes on with a drop of fresh citrus flavor.” “I like that.” A smirk steals on Ry’s dark lips as he takes another puff of his cigarette. “And it somehow coats you in an entire mysticism, maybe because of the patchouli that unfolds as you are wearing it through the day and a touch of myrrhe adds onto it. And I think I’ve never smelled a perfume that’s so enduring with such excellence.” “Now you start to flatter me,” Ry lets him know after an extended exhale of smoke that shortly cloaked both in a little cloud. “I have to admit, it makes me not only a little crazy for you,” Thyjs confesses while Ry proceeds to stub out his cigarette. "Oh, does it?” He leans back, his gaze fixed on his soldier boy. It’s a look that is able to undress him.  Thyjs gives him a heavy nod, followed by a short “Yes, Sir!” as he is looking intently at the pair of glowing eyes gazing at him so intently, that it makes him bite his bottom lip. “And it is such a sweet temptation I can’t withstand to taste.”

I really love their dynamic. And it's funny to me that Thyjs talks A LOT when he's alone with Ry only. Going to leave out the middle part bc I wanna keep this for when the time comes (which will take like forever and I already see myself adding more and more) as this chapter is faaaar away from the current ones (I have to do CH02 next …) But I also like to share the part of the closing scene:

Ryder gives him another forehead kiss and pushes him softly out of the shower. “Ich bitte darum!” He speaks with a strong tone and turns off the water. “But for now let’s find some rest, hm?” Again Thyjs just nods. He sees a smirk stealing on Ry’s lips. “What else is on your mind?” “The TV is still running. Figured you should go turn it off since you were the last one downstairs. I’ll wait in bed for you to come cuddle.” “On my way, Sir!” Thyjs replies and before Ryder can answer anything to it, he’s gone leaving only a few water droplets in the air Ryder now watches falling down. He lets out a laugh. “Sandevistan — of course.” So much for that he would wait for him in the bed as he already knows it’s Thyjs who will be waiting for him instead, when he leaves the bathroom.

Along the way writing Thyjs I started to like that sometimes he uses his fast ability also in normal life situations. I think it's funny when you tell him something to do and he's like okay and just vanishes to go after it and well, does it a lot faster than you expect it bc people like Ryder living a live without Sandevistan don't think about that this ability can speed up some processes where it is not exactly necessary to wait (I mean he could not boil food faster using Sandevistan, but he could prepare the stuff needed for it faster - stuff like that).

—

tagging the usual folks I guess:

@gloryride, @astarionhistears, @streetkid-named-desire, @dreamskug, @fereldanwench, @aggravateddurian, @kdval, @elvenbeard, @kittenchrissy, @therealnightcity, @shivsghost and @rosapexa + anyone seeing this. no pressure ofc! <3

[fanficsandfluff]

Tickletober 2022 - Day 13: Blush

A/N: I find this so entertaining because literally the other two days of prompts you wanted have already been requested, AND I didn't feel like doing Ghost Tickles because it's too similar to the force and I've already written a Mando fic utilizing the force. So thank you, AnonEmu, for sending in your loving words and prompts! I hope this suffices, even though it's not exactly what you requested!

Fandom: The Mandalorian (Star Wars)

Characters: Din Djarin (The Mandalorian) x Reader

There were times while you were getting to know the Mandalorian that you begun to pick up on his body language or verbal cues. Without having a human face to make connections with and view emotions, you had to pick up his signs and tells quicker than an average relationship.

And before long, you could tell when Din was sad, angry, anxious, in pain, nervous, and your favorites were of course him being happy. When Din was happy, he'd stand up straighter and his helmet would face you a couple seconds too long, so you knew he was smiling under there. Sometimes his fingers would tap out patterns or beats on an object he was near or holding, or sometimes on his own thigh. That showed that he was content and felt safe.

"I'm nohot kidding, I think you would look cute with this," you joked around with him one late night, holding up a large pink bow a village child made for Din after he'd helped them out.

"Never," Din replied curtly.

You were both sitting on the floor of the ship, facing each other, each leaning against an opposite wall. And your legs were laced together, one and then the other.

"They made it for you, you know," you sighed, a smile still playing on your lips.

"And as my gift, I choose to give it to you for you to wear."

"You're no fun," you huffed. The two of you shared a few moments of quiet as you thumbed the fabric of the bow between your fingers. Then you leaned forward and reached your arms up, trying to wrap it around Din's helmet.

"Stay still!"

"Stop!"

You had to heave yourself up onto your knees, but you got it on his helmet and positioned it in the perfect way before you busted up in laughter, holding onto your stomach.

"Alright, enough," Din made the move to remove the bow from his helmet, but his hand stopped halfway in the air. It was just so nice to hear you laughing, and he didn't want it to end sooner than it had to.

"Youhuhu look so adorable! Here, I'll get you a mirror!" you stumbled up to your feet and ran to get a reflective surface for Din. You brought back a loose metal plate that was meant to go into a wall panel on the ship that hasn't yet been fixed.

And it was then that you saw a new reaction. Din was blushing. You didn't know how you knew, but it seemed clear as day. He seemed tenser than normal, but not as tense as when he was anxious or mad. And his head was angled towards the floor, and once he got a look at himself, his head turned to the side. His hand slid around on his helmet to try and feel for the bow to rip it off.

"No need to be embarrassed," you sat yourself beside Din and grabbed his wrist that was searching for the bow. After lowering it, you took your hand and removed it, placing it into your lap. You looked into the vents of his helmet and smiled at him, "Like I said, you looked adorable. Definitely add it to the repertoire," your hand hadn't released Din's wrist, so you took advantage of the situation and slid your hand into his gloved one. And you held it. An image of Din's Beskar tinted pink at his cheeks swam through your brain and it made you smile brighter.

~~~

"Come here."

"No, you're going to annoy me," that staticky voice filtered through the helmet.

You snorted. How astute of the Mandalorian.

"I wihill not annoy you," you raised your hand in the air as if to swear, "I want to test it out, okay? That's all... if you really hate it, I'll stop. I promise."

Once Din had reluctantly dragged himself back towards the bed by you, he sat himself down. And he sat stiffly. You heard him clear his throat before he presented his hand to you.

You held Din's hand in one of yours, his palm face up.

You had been helping him take off his Beskar armor when you discovered something. The arm plates had slid off, except for a sharp corner getting caught on the cloth of his glove, and you quickly reached to pull the fabric back up to its rightful place. And Din drew his arm back in such a way that you knew it didn't have to do with him feeling exposed or in pain.

With a gentle touch, you pinched the edge of Din's glove between your fingers and slid it down so his wrist was no longer covered. You glanced up towards his face, making sure you still had permission. It looked like his gaze was a little off to the left of you. You placed one finger onto his wrist and rubbed the skin tenderly.

And then the reaction came again. Din's fingers twitched and he moved to pull his arm to himself, but you made sure he kept it in your grip.

You smiled a mile wide towards him, "You're soft there," was how you decided to word it. And again, you could see Din blushing. It was endearing. Not literally, of course, but the energy was the same.

Your finger rubbed around his wrist until it slipped under his glove, hooking the fabric and dragging it up a hair, just so you could touch his palm now. Din gasped and his fingers flinched.

"Very soft," you seemed to whisper unconsciously.

This was a big step for your relationship. You were seeing and touching some of his skin. You weren't going to take this new step for granted. Anything to keep Din blushing like you knew he was.

~~~

"Nuh-uh, no."

"Please! Oh, please, Din!"

"You're going to stop and never bring this up again."

"Fine..." you huffed, before continuing, "I wasn't doing anything in the first place."

Din eyed you. Yes, eyed you with his literal, beautiful dark brown eyes.

"Could you be crystal clear and tell me what it was I was doing that got you so defensive, Mando?" you turned the tease up to 11, crawling towards him on the plush sofa you two had previously been cuddling on.

Din shook his head and his eyes tried to avoid yours now. You watched him suck in his cheek in the effort to not smile, you assumed. And that only made you smile bigger and brighter, "I just touched you like..." you reached out a hand towards Din's side and his reflexes caught your hand before you touched him, "... well, almost like that."

"I said to stop."

"You don't mean it," you tilted your head just as he moved his in the same direction, mirroring one another, "You want me to. Just for a little."

"W-Why... no, no I-I don't think I do," Din's voice got small and his eyes shifted, the corners of his mouth twitched and tugged, just dying to be pulled up into a smile... but the best part was the flush that creeped up his neck and spread to his cheeks and ears.

You smiled and leaned in closer while he still held onto your wrist, an illusion of keeping it at bay.

"You're so cute," you breathed and grinned and your hand easily slipped past Din's defenses and wiggled along his side. Your other hand quickly joined in to keep the activities lively.

Din bucked and that smile finally broke through, sweet giggles accompanying it. You kissed around his pink neck, and at the apples of his cheeks, and finally one sweet kiss to the tip of his nose, now rosy from laughter and joy you helped bring to him.

[password-door-lock]

Mystictober Day 13-- Leaves

“This is so exciting,” you gush, tearing the sticky label off of your brand-new rake. You take a moment to appreciate the sharpness and the straightness of the tines— they won't stay that way for long, if experience serves you. “Our first fall together! And we have our very own yard to rake!” It's a strange milestone, but as far as you're concerned, it's a milestone all the same.

Saeran grins at you, endeared. “I'm looking forward to it,”  he assures you. “Though it's going to be new for me.”

You shrug. “It's really not that difficult,” you announce, “At least, not from what I remember… I’m pretty rusty, too. I haven’t had to do this since high school.” You’ve been living in the middle of the city for a while, and though you’ve gotten very good at sweeping the balconies of various apartments, you haven’t had to seriously worry about leaves for quite some time now. “But I did learn to rake leaves in elementary school, so maybe it’s one of those skills that sticks with you, like riding a bike.”

“You were doing chores like this when you were that young?” Saeran asks, surveying the yard. It's not too bad— the big tree near the garden has just started to drop its first leaves, but you figure that if the two of you make a day of it, going out and collecting all the leaves every week or so, the task won't become too big.

“I mean, I was trying,” you shrug, “I wasn't very good at it, but I had a lot of fun raking them into little piles and jumping in— we could do that, too, if you want, but there might not be enough leaves yet, so we’d have to wait until the tree really gets going.” 

“That does sound like fun, darling,” Saeran admits, giving your hand a small squeeze before returning his attention to the yard. “How should we start?”

To be honest, with all of his gardening experience, you were surprised when Saeran first told you that he'd never raked leaves before, but the more you thought about it, the more sense it made— as Ray, he was allowed to tend the gardens at Magenta, but there were other believers officially assigned to the task, and the grounds there were so sprawling that Rika likely would have considered it counterintuitive to have him spend so much time away from his computer when someone with fewer responsibilities could easily have done it. Of course, even if you didn't understand, you wouldn't say anything about it to Saeran— your general philosophy is that he can tell you what he wants to when he wants to, and that can be that. It’s his decision what he wants to share with you or keep to himself about his time at Magenta, and you won’t press him for any more than that.

“Well, what I like to do is to rake one horizontal line— maybe up by the flower beds?— and then do vertical lines the length of the yard to finish it up. Then we'll have a long pile of leaves that we can just rake onto a tarp or into garbage bags to add to the compost heap— after we jump in them, of course.” You use hand gestures to aid your explanation, which would probably be a bit confusing without them.

Saeran nods; he seems to understand regardless of your erratic explanation style. “Of course, my love. Let's do that.” With the two of you working, it doesn't take too long to clear the yard of leaves at all. Perhaps your childhood memories of entire afternoons spent cleaning up leaves were slightly exaggerated in the depths of your mind—  or perhaps you've just grown a lot since then. Maybe it's the fact that you have help— regardless, you're happy that you can share this moment with Saeran. 

Once all the leaves are piled up, you take the liberty of flopping into them with a thud. “Okay, you know what, honey? That wasn’t as fun as I remember it being.” You’re laying on your back amid the leaf pile, which is really more of a leaf area— there aren’t quite enough leaves yet for a proper pile.

Saeran, who apparently has much more common sense than you do, lowers himself down into the leaves by your side at a much more controlled rate. Consequently, there is much less thudding involved. “I had fun,” he assures you, “Since I got to spend time with you.” 

“Spending time together is always nice,” you agree, staring up at the clouds. You don’t need Saeran to tell you that he’s also cloud gazing— you can just tell. “Even if we’re doing chores.” 

“Mhm,” he agrees. “No matter what we’re doing, I’m happy to be by your side.” 

You reach over to squeeze his hand, though your train of thought is quickly derailed by a passing cloud. “That one kind of looks like a mug, doesn’t it?” You point with your free hand. 

Saeran examines the cloud in question. “It’s more like an elephant,” he decides. 

“An elephant?” You can’t help but laugh. “No, there’s the cup part,” you trace the outline in the air, “And there’s the handle.” 

“That’s the trunk, my love,” Saeran argues good-naturedly, “It’s clearly an elephant.” 

“No, babe, it’s obviously a mug,” you retort, “It’s making me want hot chocolate.”

“Hm,” Saeran considers the cloud once more, “It still looks like an elephant, but I won’t complain about hot chocolate.” 

“We probably have to get up, then,” you groan, rising so that you’re propped up on your elbows. “Would you rather hold the tarp or rake the leaves onto it?” 

“I’m fine with either, darling,” he assures you, “I’ll be thinking about hot chocolate the whole time.” 

“Alright, whatever you say.” You grin. You’re probably going to be thinking about hot chocolate, too. 

[hunted-moth]

Forest Of Dreams Pt 2 // New Life, New dreams

Word Count// 3,732

Summary// Y/n awoke to a new dream after being in cryo sleep, this one was different for some reason. As she and Jake landed on pandora they met Norm and their Boss Grace Agustine. Tension was high during the meeting. The next day Jake and Y/n finally experience that thing that put them there in the first place

Warnings// Language, nightmare, not listing to med techs(idk I'm bad at this link if I need to add stuff!)

A/N EY your back! Glad you liked it, this one is a bit longer, also I don't understand na’vi so please don't expect me to write the na’vi parts, ill translate it the best I can though

Speaking Na’vi

‘Thoughts’

*mini time skip, like a small location change

You were running, jumping over logs, climbing over rocks. But every time you got close to your prize you'd hear laughing and they run even further from you. As you speed up, you saw a figure, it was the first time you saw the person who giggled and laughed in your dreams. And damn was she beautiful, putting the gorgeous forest to shame.

You saw her on an edge of a waterfall, as you walked closer she jumped and you woke up in your cyro pod.

It was dark and cramped, you were confused for just a second before remembering where you were.

You felt yourself move as the pod you were in opened. You were unbuckled and you started to float up.

“We here,” you asked, the tiredness escaping your mouth

“Oh yeah, we're here alright,” the nurse said with a hint of energy in him.

He continued “You've been in cryo for 5 years 9 months, and 22 days. You will be hungry and you will be weak” he yelled to the other men and women who had just awoken from cryo like you.

You glided over to your locker and grabbed some of the clothes you stored in there. It was your school sweatshirt and a pair of pants with shoes.

They then corraled you to board the ship that’ll take you to Pandora. You sat next to Jake and noticed he look serious, giggling to yourself as he seemed to be in his marine mode. He often said that ‘once a marine, always a marine’.

*

You sat next to Jake on the air shuttle taking you to Pandora. You were given a safety briefing on the Exo packs and the air on the moon. The mask looked interesting, it covered the whole face while still showing it.

As the shuttle was landing everyone stood up in a single file line, god it reminded you of your JROTC days back in high school. You stayed seated with your brother, you offered to help him but he declined it. You assume he was in full marine mode by now.

“Common special case, I'm not waiting all day for you two” the man stated as you both passed him walking onto the tarmac. The place was littered with army dogs, who would've been fighting for freedom or earth, but here it was for a paycheck.

As the two of you were going forward, an amp almost walk over Jake if he didn't see it first

“Look out hot rod” was all he said. Jake ignored him, but you threw your arms up ‘saying what the hell man’ without saying anything. You continue forward with a sour look on your face, but a giant bulldozer rolls by, with giant arrows in the tiers, stoped both you and Jake in your tracks, having a look of awe on your face you said “Woah, some big arrows huh,” you alerting two security ops. They turn to you and Jake.

“Ey man, look at that, meal on wheels and a science puke with it,” one said and the other went “Ah man now that's just wrong,” with a smirk.

You Jake got to where they were, noticing that they were staring at you both.

“What you two limp dicks staring at?” Jake said with some attitude in his voice

Causing the bald one to respond with “looking at you stumpy, and it ain’t so limp right now” He had a disgusting smirk on his face as he eyed. You just rolled your eyes and walked away

You heard one of them do the cat call whistle at you, you turned around and said:

“suck my cock and balls, ya bald fuck” You turned around firing back while doing the suck it a gesture

Turning back around you looked down at Jake to see him shaking his head a rolling away from you into the building.

LOCATION- Safety Briefing: Mess Hall

You and Jake were a bit late, the fact it was a huge building and there weren’t places for Jake to wheel through didn't help. But eventually, both of you got there

“You are not in Kansas anymore.” was the first thing that reached your ears

“You are on Pandora, ladies, and gentlemen. Respect that fact every second of every day. If there is a Hell, you might wanna go there for some R&R after a tour on Pandora.” the little joke he made was kinda amusing to you, but you only chucked to yourself as the two of you walked in, opting to sit in the back. You hop on a table to listen to the rest of his speech.

“Out there beyond that fence, every living thing that crawls, flies, or squats in the mud wants to kill you and eat your eyes for jujubes.” he continues, though you think he's being a bit dramatic to scare the new recruits.

“We have an indigenous population of humanoids called the Na'vi. They're fond of arrows dipped in a neurotoxin that will stop your heart in one minute - and they have bones reinforced with naturally occurring carbon fiber. They are very hard to kill. As head of security, it is my job to keep you alive. I will not succeed. Not with all of you.” he said the last part looking in your and Jake's direction, but you think he was looking at Jake the whole time.

You spaced out the entire time after that, you were used to military briefs from all the drills in JROTC plus you knew what to expect from your avatar training. After that, you hopped off the table and the two of you headed out to the labs.

You and Jake were in a tight halfway trying to squeeze through everyone when you heard a small ‘excuse me’ from behind you and then saw a tall man, you recognized him as Norm Spellman. Meeting him at avatar training, though you two were in different squads so you were never that close to him, but he still came over a few times.

“Excuse me your Jake right, Tom's brother. Sorry im Norm Spellman, Man you look exactly like him” He shook Jake's hand then you perked up “Hey wheres my greeting Norm” you joked

He looked embarrassed and went to apologize but you budded in saying “Nah it's cool man”

“you know him?” Jake asked, but he didn't have any heart like he didn't really care. “Hmm yeah me, him, and Tom were in the program together, different squads though,” you said like it didn't matter, you noticed the fall of Norm's face

“I'm sorry to hear about you brother, he was a good man, it came as a big shock to all of us” He tried to offer some condolence but it came out awkward. “Yeah,” Jake said

“hey man it's alright don't worry about it too much, don't mind him either he's a bit of a grouch right now” you tried to comfort Norm, he willed his way through another conversation “So you're taking over his avatar right,” he asked with some excitement trying to bring the mood up, a ‘yep’ was that was heard “umm want to go take a look at them, there in the bio lab”

“Yeah sure let's go check it out, want to see how mines holding up” you mused and started walking to the lab

LOCATION- BIO LABS

“Hey welcome to Pandora good to have ya,” a man you assume to be a scientist in charge right now shakes you and Jake's hand greeting you to Pandora.

“Damn, they got big” Jake chuckled “Yeah they matured on the way out” Norm stated and the scientist constituted “Yeah great muscle tone too, it'll take a few hours to get them canted, but you should be able to drive them tomorrow” he then pointed over to the other two avatars saying “there's your guys”

You walked over to the female one and saw your avatar. Her hair was already braided around the queue, but extra hair was still loose, clouding her face. She was just floating around in the amino acids and twitched a few times.

You were just staring at her you didn't notice Jake rolling over to you, with Norm not far behind.

“Wow, looks just like you, but taller…and blue” Jake said “Yeah, wonder if ill still be taller than you” you joked, Jake never liked how you suddenly got to call him short. “Yeah we’ll see, bet ill be taller than you by a foot” he stated with a puffed chest

You punched his arm, then Max stated he'd take you to the link pod bay, and to meet your boss for the next 6 years, Grace Augustine.

*

“WHERES MY GODDAME CIGGURETE” was the first thing you heard. But you were more paying attention to Jake and the Norms convo, it started with a simple question from Jake.

Whose this Grace Augustine, it was a simple question one you knew the answer to but the Norm beat you to it

“Grace Augustine is a legend, she's the head of the avatar program and wrote the book and I mean literally wrote the book on pandora botany,” Norm said as if it was a simple fact of life and Max interjected saying “Yeah its cause she likes plants more than people” he added

“Ahh there she is, cinderella back from the ball I see, Grace I’d like you to meet Norm Spellman and Y/n and Jake Sully”.

Grace took a puff from her smoke and addressed you and Norm

“Norm and Y/n heard a lot of good things about you two, hows your Na’vi,” she asked while putting her hands behind her back

Norm shot first saying “May all mother smile upon our first meeting” He finished off with a grin like a just got all As on his report card

“Not bad you sound a little formal” Grace replied in na’vi to which Norm continued with “I studied for five years, there's still some much to learn” She then turned to you expecting a show of your words

“Ahh well, not good at it, still learning” you finished with a shy smile “weak point in learning to speak it hearing good” Grace only nodded and said “it can be rather hard”

Max tried to divert the attention to Jake and introduce him to her, but she only waved him off saying

“Yeah yeah, I know who you are and I don't need you. I need your brother, you know the other brother, who had a Ph.D. and trained for three years on this mission” she said in a tone, both you and Jake didn't like too much

“He's dead, I know that it's a big inconvenience for everyone” Jake spat at her. You felt his annoyance radiate off him. You then threw your hat into the ring and shot off with

“Ma’am I don't exactly like you insulting and deeming my brother, he may not be what you need but he's here to help, any way he can. So lay off a bit will you” You finished off, and you looked around to see Norm's eyes as wide as saucers, and Grace's face, it had a mix of ‘what did you just say’ and ‘hmm impressive’.

“How much lab training have you had” She directed it towards Jake and you knew he was screwed, he practically failed science even with you and tommys help

“I dissected a frog once,” he said with a smug look, and that look combined with the answer blew Grace's lid off

“Ya see, ya see? They're just pissing on us without even giving us the courtesy of calling it rain. I'm going to Selfridge.” with that, she walked off.

Max tried to reason with her “Grace. No, I don't think…” but it was futile as Grace just fought back “No, man, this is such bullshit! Gonna kick his corporate butt. He has no business sticking his nose in MY department.”

And with that, she went off to bridgehead to talk with you mused. Max faced you guys and told you guys to be here at 0800, told Jake to say big words, and walked off.

The three of you just stood there, looking at each other. Jake was in the biggest sour mood, you were peeved, and Norm looked at you two like you were combing into one in front of him.

“Wha-what did you two just do!” he said you and Jake just looked at each other. You were confused about why he was so bewildered.

“What do you mean?” you questioned him with a look of confusion written on your face, Jake looked more annoyed that he was being questioned.

“WHAT DO YOU MEAN- WHAT DO YOU MEAN, you just told off Grace Augustine, our boss” “Yeah what about it, she was shit-talking my brother, Sullies don't ride like that” with pride for your brother you put your hand on his shoulder. “I-i guess that makes sense, but please don't do that again! Or at least not in front of me might actually have a heart attack!” he finished holding his heart, you and Jake looked at each other and laughed, he sorta reminded you of tom at that moment.

LOCATION- MESS HALL

The three of you went off to your sleeping quarters with the help of another scientist, Then went to eat with the others. You sat next to Jake and were talking to another scientist, you didn't notice that Jake was more or less by himself eating, to wrap up talking about Pandora.

When a woman came up to your table, wearing an airforce uniform, the table got kinda quiet as Grace stopped talking to just looked at her, you looked over at her when she started speaking

“I'm looking for a Jake Sully.” she looked around then Jake spoke up “Down here.” she looked down then grinned and tilted her head in a direction “Come with me, Quaritch

needs ya,” Grace raised her voice at this “now what does he need him for?” she sounded annoyed already “I'm not sure just needs him ma'am-” “are you just gonna stand here? Let's go.” and with that, he was off, the women jogged after him leading him to where he was needed.

‘Wonder what he needs with Jake’ You continued your conversation and ended lunch and retired to your bed to finally get some shut-eye.

LOCATION- ROOM

Sleep was difficult, being in a new place, hell on a new planet, meaning sleep was hard to come by. But the sweet embrace of sleep hugged you, and you were out like a light.

*

You were walking in the dense forest, with careful steps. Looking around for a way out of the forest. It was nightfall now, and you could feel the fear in your body with each step as it rose. You heard something in the brush you stared at for a minute before feeling okay that nothing would jump out at you.

That's when you heard it, a giggle. But it didn't sound happy or joyful, no, it sounded sinister and evil. But you couldn't see where it was coming from, which only made your fear worsen.

When a sudden rustle in the bushes made you spin to it. Not seeing anything, you turn back, but you heard it again, the giggles, right behind you. You took off, faster than you ever ran before.

But with your luck, your foot got caught on a root and you were sent flying to the floor. You turn on your back to see what awaits you. You see nothing then the laughter starts again. This time, it surrounded the forest, suffocating your ears. Then you heard it pounce on you, you closed your eyes- and you sat up in your bed, sweating drips down your forehead.

Then your alarm goes off signally to you that it's 6:30 now, meaning you have half hour to eat breakfast and get ready.

*

You were eating with your brother. You two were just talking when norm cam and sat your table, Jake looked slightly annoyed but you spoke up and greeted him.

“Hey Norm, how’d ya sleep last night?” “Oh alright, the beds are bit uncomfortable but I’ll like haha” you both laughed when Jake asked how you slept, “so what about you? You look like you saw a ghost when you left your room.”

“Oh uhh, we’ll I had the forest dream again, but this time it was more like a nightmare, It was like someone was watching me then I started running with I heard giggling surround me then I woke up” you finished with a shrug “hmm yeah that’s a night meat alright,”

Norm looked slightly confused “wait forest dreams, do you always have dreams like these?” He asked with a confused face “oh yeah since I was a kid, but they weren’t always like that nightmare, usually I was chasing the laughter, it’s actually what got me into geology” you finished with a smirk.

You checked the time to see 7:30 meaning you only had 30 minutes to get ready, you told the other men this and you all went off.

LOCATION- LINK POD BAY

“So how much link time have you logged,” Grace asked you guys as she walked you to the pods. “Umm about 520 hours” he answered before you, “I logged in about 250 hours” yours wasn't much but it was something compared to Jake “that's good, Norm you in there, Y/n your here, and your here,” she pointed to Jakes pod and did some operating things “so how many hours did you log” “zip” you could just feel the annoyance from the next pod over

You lay down in your pod, the inside was made from this squishy silicon-type material that dip from the pressure that was on it.

The scientist that was assisting you to put the cage down and ask if you were ready, oh you were more than ready, you put your thumbs up and they put the lid down after instructing you to keep your mind blank. Then it was dark, you closed your eyes, relaxing then you saw white

You opened your eyes to see a doctor in your face, “Hey Y/n, how are you feeling?” it was bright as the doc was flashing light in your eyes testing your pupil's dilation. “Your eyes seem good, can you hear me well?” she asked as you felt your ear swivel around “Oh yeah loud and clear doc”

She had you sit up, you look over to Norm and Jake, it look like Jake just woke up. “If you can just perform some movement that is really nice, just wriggle your toes or fingers”

you saw Jake standing up, so decided to try it too.

“Oh no Y/n, you need to sit down please–” “No it's fine I got this, promise” you try to reason with her “No we need you to sit down, you're going a little too fast right now”

When you stood up you almost fell on the poor woman. But you regained your balance, you were close to a wall and you felt your tail hit it “Yo Jake, look at it, I feel like a cat!”

Jake looked in your direction then he felt his tail and looked at it. You and Jake were causing panic for the med techs, they called for you two to be sedated, and you walked forward to Jake and ripped off your IV and other medical stuff.

You landed on him and looked at Max through the window, he yelled saying “guys, listen to me; you are not used to your avatar bodies, you need to return to your beds, this is dangerous-” “This feels great,” “Jake, Y/n-” “c’mon guys, their gonna put you out” they both tried and failed to get you two to your beds

Jake walked away with the biggest grin on his face, you stayed put, just watching him move around the med bay, his tail knocked into some things, then he was gone, he just left the bay.

You saw this and followed after him, same with Norm. when you all got out there Jake was on a court, you ran to him while Norm was still with the med people. You caught up to him

“Hey wait up” You had a playful smile on your face as you caught up to your older brother, Norm not long behind

You two clumsily passed a bunch of people, accidentally bumping into people. Then he started to build momentum, so you built momentum. He noticed and went faster, you chased him and eventually you started to race each other, the fishline unknown to you both

You passed other avatars training on obstacle courses, then you almost ran into an amp suit, you two gave half-hearted apologies, as you ran into a field of fruits.

He stopped suddenly, you almost crashed into him. You caught your breath while looking around, it was…green and full of life, as opposed to earth and base, which was gray and dull. You dug your feet into the dirt, you can't even remember the last time you did that!

“Hey, Sullies!” you both looked over to see… Grace! You both uddered a quiet ‘damn’ and ‘shit’ under your breaths as you saw grace in her avatar for the first time

“Grace?” Jake was the first to speak to her “Who do you think numbnuts?” Grace looked over and threw some fruit at you guys, “Think fast.”

“Motor control looking good” she stated

You caught it and looked at Jake to see if he’d eat, he looked at you and took a bite to make sure it was safe for you. He bit into it and groned from how good it was, and from that, you took your first bite, then another, and another, it was sweet and made you want to keep eating it. Grace giggled at you two, it was like seeing two toddlers tiring something new instead of two adults.

*

After you got your avatar situated and properly looked at which the doctors were not happy with you three.

You sat in your bed, you and Jake looking at your queues, they had white tendrils and were squirming around looking for something to connect to, from what you could remember, it could connect to the environment

“Kinda freaking huh,” Jake said to you, “Yeah reminds me of testicles or so-” you were interrupted with “Don't play with that, you'll go blind” It scared Jake but you just laughed as you knew it was practically harmless. You put it away as you laid down to ‘sleep’. The forest was alive as you could hear so many animals in the forest, but you closed your eyes and opened them in the link pod.

LOCATION- ROOM

You retired to your room after a long and rough day. You cleaned yourself up, changed into comfy clothes, and laid in your bed.

When you closed your eyes and fell asleep you were met with black and then woke up, looks like you didn't have a dream last night.

But now you had an even longer day ahead of you. You, Norm, Jake, and Grace were going out to collect samples out into the forest.

Next // PT 3 Deja Vu

Previous // PT 1 A Shit Place

// Masterlist //

Taglist //

A/N // see told you it would be longer lol. NOW IM EXCITED! We get to meet Neytiri, idk if you noticed but I'm following the plot of the movie, but now I'm wondering if I should end at the Tree of Souls or just complete it like in the movie. And even do some way off the water stuff, like head cannons of they function and work, but we’ll see when that happens ;)

Anyways let me know what you think, and give me ideas and stuff for later chapters and stuff

MY DUMBASS DIDN’T PUT ANY TAGS!!! I wonder no was seeing it T-T

[hrodvitnon]

Since @geminavaju shared I figured I may as well add to that conversation.

I've not actually written a lot of smut. The vast majority has actually been through submissions here- and one of the reasons I have submitted a lot here is just literally cuz I need to practice.

Recently I tried to write an adult scene for my big main writing project that I've invested a lot of time into. It was supposed to be a big payoff moment in that story- but the key word is 'tried' here. I kinda just figured writing smut would just be like writing anything else and it'd be easy for me to hop right into with a little bit of extra vocabulary. I got like 3 lines into it before I legitimately asked myself: "What the fuck am I writing this is awful".

So yeah: turns out writing smut is really awkward at first, especially between characters you had not considered sexual beings previously. Who'da thought? Could be I'm just not used it, could be some weird internalized guilt, could be my inability to not project onto fictional beings, but yeah that shit doesn't come easy to me and still doesn't. I assume it's like a muscle thing where you gotta work it to strengthen it, that how most creative ventures seem to be (like I can't write smut or draw anything for shit but I'm much better at writing action sequences because I've written tons of those). So- I'm getting there I think.

What's helped me the most probably is actually to think of it in terms of characters, similar to what Gem said. This is how I think through basically everything else in writing is to just go back to your characters and ask "What the hell would they do here?". To use Godzilla as an example: if I stuck the head honcho lizard into a situation where he really likes someone else and wants to express that physically- how does he do that? What I really like about this approach is that A. It always gives you something no matter who occupies that second spot and B. The answer is entirely dependent on the author. You can slot anyone- literally anyone- into that second spot and the characters will give you something, even if it doesn't end in le sex. Mothra, Rodan, Ghidorah, Kong, fucking Cloud Strife- put anyone in that spot, let the characters guide you, and just see where it goes. Something will happen every time without fail (this reason alone is why i am also a chronic multishipper- the amount of permeations and alternate relationship paths to explore and facets of a single character to write drives my ass forward). Additionally- the answer to the question "What the hell would they do here?" is 1000% author dependent. Going back to Godzilla; you, me, Gemini, basically everyone on this damn website would answer that question at least a little differently because we've all got a different interpretation of the big pink dinosaur in our heads. It's only exacerbated by Godzilla's personality not being super concrete and able to be interpreted many different ways- but it does stay true for other characters as well.

So yeah, return to the root of the story (the characters) and things start going better.

Yeah, it's very much a back-and-forth between character and writer; in my case it's actually gotten challenging to write Shamhat because it involves beings who've been around for millennia and they know a lot about doing the deed, on top of there a large cast of characters; meanwhile when my SIGNALIS series Liebchen, Komm Zu Mir took a smutty turn it was easier to write because not only was it new and different, both characters are comparatively more relatable (one human and one Replika, which are based on humans). Both are canonical lovers who've known each other for almost a decade if not longer, and it was fun to imagine how an android with no reproductive organs or erogenous zones, who is built for combat and engineering and nothing else, can conceivably experience arousal and an orgasm equivalent. (Answer: a bit of phantom limb syndrome and a heat ventilation system inspired by a fan comic of Ariane wondering What Does This Button Do?)

[ilikedyourablogithere]

When it comes to counter units I still say Falken is my favorite. Mostly cause he's what I'm actually after in turn base games...The Gambler archetype

Ya sure he counters but it's HOW he counters is his appeal as a gambler archetype

He can attack

He can take some hp

He can apply debuffs

or he just send out an AOE apply debuff and take hp

It's that risk of leaving it to rng and being rewarded for it. That's what I like about Falken as Gambler.

The part where he can handle himself in boss fights is just a nice bonus

If there was anything I'd change...I'd add some more effects probably a buff and self damaging attack for risk factor

Next up for the gambler archetype is looking to be our new wind 5 star Norah

Her basic attack has 3 different effects

Attack harder

AP decrease

Dispells buffs

And sure while the effects go in a set order with each attack the point of her character is to counter so you can't really rely on getting the right effect when her turn comes back around

Her second ability she goes into a stance where she has to gamble on getting enough consecutive counters so she can complete her loops so she can get her buff

which if you are able to pull off will be very much worth it

Compared to Falken there's more control to her but she still has some risk to her which I really dig. Plus she's a Wind Fighter and compared to an Inferno Defender she probably can't stay on the field as long as Falken can so there's also the endurance risk to go along with it

So ya I'd say she's still a gambler archetype character and one I'm really look forward to

Next up would be Laura but a very low gambler because there's not much risk

Enemy destroys shields and Laura will either

Attack

Attack and Silence

or nothing

Don't get me wrong Laura is 100% best girl in game and I love her to death and bits but as a gambler ... I kinda wish she had more outstanding outcomes

And the lowest gambler would be Stewart because there's really only two outcomes

He uses his 3rd ability and hits like a truck and goes to sleep and now the enemy

Attacks him, waking him up and he retaliates with the alcoholic extrovert beam

leave him alone because why would anyone let him hit you with the alcoholic extrovert beam and he waste his turn

He's not a very exciting gambler but he makes up for it by hitting hard

I would go onto the discord and request more gambler archetype stuff in the game but this is an turn base game so that means everyone a bunch of big scaredy cats when they see any percentage lower than 100%. So if I did make that request it would be universally rejected

so I'll just be grateful with what I have and enjoy my time

[daintyduck99]

"you get flustered really easily...cute." "haha...thanks...i think. was that a compliment? why are you laughing." . . .very much sounds like Reggie/Anyone

Reggie starts playing at the pier to get out of his head and his family's new house.

He stays for the cute couple. 

And it's not just that they're cute; they seem to genuinely like his music. He has yet to catch their names, but they always leave something in his case: bracelets or seashells if not money, or a scrap of lyrics that fit perfectly into one of his songs. 

Some of the latter are hard to read, but he likes the challenge. 

He likes them, their melodic laughter and their gifts and the girl's warm brown eyes and the guy's wild grin. And sure, Reggie likes the beach, but he can admit it to himself; he hasn't moved because of them.

They show up with their own instruments one Saturday, a crescent-moon tambourine and an acoustic guitar, and his heart drops. They're all smiles, but there's only one thing he can do to head off the embarrassment before it blooms. 

He clutches his banjo closer to his chest—maybe he really wanted to impress them today—and starts to collect his stuff, avoiding eye contact all the while. 

"Sorry, I never meant—I'm pretty new here, I didn't know this was your spot." 

"It isn't," the guy says slowly, and when Reggie dares to look, he's wearing a puzzled little frown. "Dude, don't leave!" 

The girl steps forward. "What Luke means is, we were hoping we could play with you. We haven't been trying to like, bribe you out of your spot, or whatever." 

He laughs nervously, but her voice sounds—soothing, not exasperated, as if she thinks he's dumb, or something. She regards him with her kind, lovely eyes. 

"You're really good at…what, four instruments? Luke won't say it, but even that harmonica line you played the other day has been stuck in his head." 

Luke shrugs and smiles, as if to say what can you do, and Reggie flushes, because apparently, the answer is to jam together. 

Then he remembers that the girl asked him a question, sort of. He clears his throat, biting his lip as she cocks her head. 

"Five. Five instruments, I also play piano." 

She lights up with a grin that exposes an adorable little gap between her teeth, holding out her hand for a fist bump and giggling when he accepts it a beat too late. 

"Me too! I'm Julie, by the way." 

"Reggie," he replies, wincing internally at how breathless he sounds and how his eyes can't stop skittering between them. "I'm Reggie, hi, nice to um, meet you." 

God, but they're both grinning at him again. Luke studies him pretty shamelessly, which is enough to make his heart go haywire and his face get even hotter, but Julie's gaze lingers on his hands. 

"You're wearing the bracelets." 

"Huh? Oh—" Reggie rubs the back of his neck, which also feels weirdly warm. "Yeah. I really like them. They’re cool.” 

She giggles again. It's a beautiful sound, and he doesn't know how he'll survive it if she's going to sing. She lifts her wrists. 

"We match! I make them all the time, so. I'm really glad you like them." 

Luke interjects, then, which is perfect, because it keeps Reggie from saying something really dumb, like, 'I like you.'

"What do you want to play first, Reg?" 

A pleased smile makes its way onto his lips without his permission. 

"You're nicknaming my nickname?" 

"He does it to me, too," Julie volunteers. "But really, though. What should we play?"

Reggie bites his lip, considering. 

"Well—I don't know how you feel about country, but everyone likes 'Love Story', right? We could start with that?" 

Julie sends him a conspiratorial smile, looking at him through her lashes. 

Reggie has to look away, heart pounding in his ears, making it difficult to process her reply. Something about how Luke doesn't love country, but he'll do this one for them. 

For her, surely. Close enough. 

Reggie launches into the banjo intro before he can embarrass himself any further. When Luke joins in, and Julie adds her voice and the accent of her tambourine, something magical happens. 

It should be a bit awkward, but it's not. Playing with them is easy. 

They quickly amass a small crowd, but the only things that matter are the vibrations in his chest, rippling between them like they're one entity. The way his fingers fly, and Luke and Julie follow seamlessly. 

How their voices soar, and they move around each other like melodic lines. 

Seriously, the way they sing with him—to him, almost—is unreal. Luke playfully thumps Reggie’s chest at one point, and he nearly falters on the harmony, caught in the glow of his sunrise hazel eyes, that wild grin and the words lilting out of it.

Julie comes really close toward the end of the song, scrunching her nose and smiling with her eyes. Hers are more like a sunset, the relaxing hue of golden hour. 

Somehow, right here and right now, he's become their midday. 

She sings to him and he can't look away. 

Is this in my head? I don't know what to think…he knelt to the ground and pulled out a ring and said…

What else can he do but finish the line? 

Marry me, Juliet, you never have to be alone; I love you and that's all I really know 

Julie giggles, and it's a brighter accent to the song than the jingle of her tambourine. It's still ringing in his head as he does the rest of Romeo's part. They all sing the last line of it together.

It's a love story, baby, just say yes 

They're jamming through the last few flourishes, and then Julie's finishing the song, and the crowd is silent for a moment before exploding into cheers. 

Reggie's deaf to them, though, as Luke sidles into his space, slinging his arm around his shoulders, and says—

"You have to join us." 

There's no way Reggie heard that correctly. 

He lets out another nervous laugh, cursing his incredibly telling complexion. "What?" 

Luke smirks in lieu of answering, poking Reggie’s flushed cheek. 

"Huh. You get flustered really easily…"

"Sometimes—" 

"It's cute," Julie interrupts, smiling even as she pries Luke's hand off Reggie’s cheek. 

"Haha…" Reggie flushes even harder. "Thanks…I think. Was that a compliment? Why are you laughing…?" 

Julie recovers first, shaking her head as she comes out of her giggle fit. 

"Sorry, sorry, it's just…you're so suave with most of the people you play to. I've seen you wink at so many pretty girls. So for you to be this flustered about us…" 

"It's really fucking cute," Luke finishes. 

Reggie nearly swallows his tongue. 

Luke and Julie scramble to fill the ensuing silence, misinterpreting it, and Luke releases Reggie like he's been burned, holding his hands out imploringly. 

"We never meant to overstep, though—" 

"Mostly he meant you should join our band, but—" 

"We're sorry if we pushed too hard."

They're so earnest and so nervous that he manages to force the words out, twisting the strap of his banjo in his palm. 

"No, no, it's not that. Sometimes—if I really like someone—it's like I can't flirt, anymore. I probably did wink at one of you, when I first saw you. But then you kept coming, and leaving me lyrics, and—playing with you was just—wow." 

They beam at him and he thinks—

Maybe he can still be their midday. 

"So you'll come to rehearsal, then?" Luke asks hopefully, bouncing on his toes. 

Julie adds, "Or maybe a date?"

All Reggie can do is nod, but that's okay. He doesn't wink at anyone for the rest of the day, but he manages it when the three of them meet for their date.

It's worth it for the way the two of them lose their wits, for once. 

[lemony-snickers]

it is so clear to me where my love of & appreciation for fanfiction comes from. this desperation for the story to never end. keep going, don't leave me behind, you know?

i still feel it when i finish a book i particularly love, the yawning open in my chest, that aching emptiness of what now, what am i supposed to do now?

i think the first time i really felt it was when i first finished the return of the king. it was summer and i was on vacation with my mother's side of the family. i stayed up until dawn broke over the lake where next to our cabin, alerting me to my missteps (we had so many fucking activities to do that day and i was bone-tired and dragging ass through every one of them) as tears tracked their way over my cheeks and i read voraciously through all the appendices and family trees, eyes scanning the words in desperation.

i didn't want the story to be over. i missed my friends already, the companions i had cultivated and loved through years as i read first the hobbit in grade school and then the fellowship of the ring and half of the two towers in quick succession thereafter. then i took a break, stumbled over a part of the tale i found too dull to pursue only to pick the book up two years later and crack its spine open and think how could i have possibly put this down? there is nothing dull about any of this.

and i remember then, how i wanted to weave a new story. keep it going on & on forever & ever, never let it go. clutch it selfishly between my fingers in a vice-like grip.

i didn't want to surrender to the fact that all the love i felt for that world and those characters had reached its end.

it's the same now as it was then, has been the same all those years in between. my mind just continues on, painting those old worlds with a new (perhaps less adept) brush.

don't leave me behind. just one more chapter, please.

i don't know how people let a thing like that go. i don't know how so much of the world simply closes a book and puts it on a shelf and thinks, yes that is enough.

i will never have enough of the worlds i truly adore and admire. never enough of the characters who bleed onto the page and into my own veins, whose dialogue whispers between my own lips like i am compelled by enchantment to put voice to their words.

(have i ever told you that i often read aloud the dialogue of characters in different voices? softly, of course, so my co-worker or my spouse doesn't overhear me from the next room. but that is how alive they feel to me. how real and necessary and loved they can be.)

and anyway i don't really know what the point of all this is. perhaps there isn't a point at all, just a rambling tumbling jumbly thought. i had some tangential thoughts about kakashi (ha, when don't i) & his relationship with icha icha, how he might view those books and those characters as it relates to my own headcanons for him, but i'm not sure it's even necessary to add them here.

because the larger point is just that i am so grateful there are others who don't want the magic to be over. others who understand that terrible empty feeling when you close a book and lose friends & lives you'll never get to live. so grateful they also create new stories & weave new tales so i can lose myself again in the magic of it. find my old friends and make new memories with them.

the older i get, the more i crave that sense of possibility from my childhood, you know? the one that truly thought one day i would walk into the deep, dark woods around my childhood home and find something inexplicably wonderful. or something dark and twisted.

something better than the dull grey world i was born into.

and maybe there isn't any magic waiting for me in the woods. maybe this dull grey existence is all i will ever be granted. but there is still so much magic to be found between the pages of a new book. so much wonder & love in the act of carrying the story forward after it ends. taking it gently in your hands, holding it delicately out to others as if to say, i made this for you (and for me) so we wouldn't feel like we've been left behind.

and whatever anyone thinks of fanfiction or fanart and the people who create it, i think there is something truly good & beautiful in that.