#havent drawn something in a long time feels nice.

[princehoneytea]

i love you WEIRD SCIENCE MIKU!!!!!

[kaihuntrr]

one-year anniversary!

HI. oh my goodness can you believe its been a WHOLE YEAR (and a day, im posting this a day later OOPS-) since i started working on this au? i dont think i started working on the chapters until... the -ber months? but the general brainstorming started now and oh my GOD the amount of changes that has happened while working on this au is insane! im absolutely floored with how much people enjoy this au, and while im too busy to be posting art (im doing some personal work!) i have all the time in the world to talk about how much this means to me.

i've written things in the past, but i havent for the LIFE of me worked on such a long project such as this (we're only halfway through act one of FIVE!) and learning and growing with such wonderful betas and partner (ehehe @mewhoismyself hello there) is just so wonderful <3

SO! in order to make this anniversary special, i've decided to post a little cut/practice scene from act two! this couldnt make the cut with what the plot has in mind, but i figured itd be best to have some nice moments with scott and martyn, eh?

OH! and before i go, the next chapter will be posted a day earlier! <3 im going abroad the day after the original chapter posting date, so i need to rest. i think this back half of the fic is gonna be really something <3

anyway, i wont keep you here for longer. i hope you have a fun time reading this, just as much as my partner and i had fun writing this so many months ago <33

Martyn tried to listen as Scott rambled on about what he’d been up to, how nice it had been to see his friends again. He even tried to let the small twist of jealousy at Scott being so happy over seeing someone else wrench his attention back into the moment, but it didn’t work. The face of Pearl kept flashing in the forefront of his mind, her eyes and jagged scar glowing unnaturally under the moonlight. 

“Oh, and…,” Scott continued to ramble on, but Martyn still couldn’t focus. It seemed that Scott had noticed as his voice trailed off and he looked at the blonde with a tilted head. “Martyn…?”

Martyn gave a grumbled response. His mind blocked out the world around him as he pictured brief flashes of the island, the hollow and desolate stares of the people, the wicked laugh coming from Pearl….

Scott sighed. “Martyn….”

Martyn could still feel a slight buzz in his head from where he was hit. How much blood did he lose back there? He didn’t know. All he knew was that he was glad to be alive. Glad that he was here, still breathing, like everyone else. Glad that he was–

“Martyn!”

Martyn jerked as Scott’s face was suddenly inches from his own. Scott’s lips were twisted into a pout and his eyebrows were drawn into a scowl. “Huh- sorry, what?”

Scott sighed, letting his head fall forward, “So you weren’t listening to me….”

“No!” Martyn said quickly, throwing his hands up. Panic leapt in his chest, making his heart beat faster. He didn’t want Scott to think he was ignoring him…! “No, I- I’m… I’m sorry…,” he hung his head. “I’m trying to listen- I’m not meaning to ignore you, I just….” Martyn looked down at the sand beneath him. Guilt welled up in his throat. He’d been so eager to see Scott while he was away, and before he’d gotten back, and now that he was actually here… Martyn was ignoring him. He was making Scott feel ignored.

Martyn shook his head, forcing a huge smile onto his face. “So, you said you saw your friends, right? Did you have fun-? Oh, what am I saying, you just said you had fun- haha…,” Martyn scrubbed the back of his head, then straightened up, rolling to his feet. “Hey, do you wanna go see if we can find your bird friend? I bet it’s missed you too!” He pointed towards a path leading up to the forest, “Bet he lives in there somewhere…!”

“Um- Martyn…,” Scott trailed off looking after him.

Martyn took a few steps backwards, away from Scott, and spread his arms, hoping he’d follow. “Or we can go down to the beach! It’s a nice day, it’ll feel great to splash in the water a little.”

“Martyn.”

“Or- oh, we can go see the decorations they’re setting up for the festival down in the center of town. You said you were excited right, so we can-!”

“Martyn!” Scott snapped. 

Martyn stopped.

Scott took the few steps to close the distance between them, laying his hand on Martyn’s arm, then sliding it down to take his hand. He tilted his head, giving Martyn big sad eyes. “Martyn, talk to me…. What’s wrong?”

It was hard for Martyn to not crack under Scott’s gaze. “It’s just…,” he trailed off, trying to put his thoughts into words. He was just engrossed in them a second ago, but now, trying to tell Scott, he couldn’t think of what to say. “I… uh….”

“You’re alright, Martyn,” Scott rubbed his thumb over Martyn’s hand in a small, circular motion. “Take your time.”

A small pause fell over him. Martyn could hear the slow ebbs of the waves before he managed to speak. “I can’t get her out of my mind,” his voice spat with venom. Pearl’s sadistic glee, her manic grin, her ever-looming presence burned in his head. Martyn’s grip unknowingly tightened around Scott until he looked the other in the eye. His grip on Scott lessened as he looked away. “What good can I be to protect you, when I can’t defend myself from one person?”

“Who said I needed protecting?” Scott raised an eyebrow, his tone still soft but with a hint of skepticism as he leaned to the side to catch Martyn’s gaze again. He let out a weak chuckle and moved his other hand to rest on Martyn’s cheek. “Besides, you can’t protect me from everything.”

Martyn leaned into the touch, not caring how warm his cheeks felt as Scott’s delicate hand pressed into his skin, lightly grazing over the scar Pearl caused. He closed his eyes as he let out a sigh and drooped his shoulders. “But I want to…,” he muttered. He looked at Scott, his face scrunched with worry. “I don’t want you getting hurt at all, Scott.”

“There’s going to be times where I get hurt, Martyn,” Scott narrowed his eyes and withdrew his hand from Martyn’s cheek. Martyn was wide-eyed, only for Scott to hold the hunter’s other hand. “When that happens, all I’d ask is for you to help me get back on my feet.”

Martyn could feel his nerves freeze up at Scott’s warm hold. His gentle stare and concern on his face nearly caused Martyn’s heart to explode. A million things swirled in his mind as the breeze wafted over. “I can’t help it,” he lowered his head, biting his lip. “You should be protected, with all the chaos going around–”

“What chaos?” Scott cracked a smile and shook his head. He shrugged, letting go of one of Martyn’s hands as he gestured around. “All there is to see is you, me, and the beach. Nothing to worry about, right?”

Nothing to worry about for now, but so many things could happen in the blink of an eye. Martyn could practically hear the sound of the sea princes’ ringing in his ears, the one from his dreams laughing as its mouth opened wide to swallow Scott as he screamed-.... 

No. Martyn needed to be prepared for anything, so nothing bad could ever happen to the people he cared for. Nothing. Never again. 

“I still want to fight for you,” his voice was barely a whisper in the wind, cracking a bit from the emotions that crawled up the back of his throat. But seeing Scott’s attentive look, with the slight tilt of his head, Martyn knew he could hear him. “Can I at least do that?” he pleaded. He needed to-. He needed to. 

“You may,” Scott nodded, giving him a small smile. Then his eyes narrowed as a smirk crept onto his lips. “So- I’d like to see how you fight.”

Martyn opened his mouth to respond- just in time for a woosh of breath to leave him as his back hit the ground. Martyn gasped, blinking for several seconds as he tried to figure out he’d gotten laid flat out on his back… with a certain ginger pinning his shoulders to the sand.

“Yikes…,” Scott teased, his eyebrows rising, complimenting the wide grin on his face.

Martyn sputtered, his face immediately flushing beat red. “I wasn’t ready! Sneak- sneak attack…!”

Scott laid one arm across his chest, propping his other elbow on top of it and laying his cheek in his hand. “Most things will take an opportunity for a sneak attack, when presented with one.” He kicked his feet in the air, as if he was lounging on a couch reading a book. 

Martyn flushed all the way to his ears. “Redo!”

Scott leaned his head down, smiling at Martyn in a way that was almost sickeningly sweet. “Are you waiting for a written invitation?” 

Martyn grabbed Scott by the shoulders and surged upwards, knocking the ginger off of him. Scott laughed as he slipped his grip, ducking under one of Martyn’s arms to wrap his arms around Martyn’s torso. 

Before Martyn’s brain could fully process that, Scott had rolled Martyn over top of him and planted him flat on his back again. 

Working on instinct more than pre-thought, Martyn wrapped his arms around Scott’s shoulders and kicked off the sand. He knocked his thigh against Scott’s hip, bumping him off balance just enough to send them rolling over again.

But Scott didn’t end up on his back underneath Martyn. 

Somehow, mid flip, he’d slithered around Martyn’s torso, ducking his arm again and getting outside of his hold. Martyn ended up with his face in the sand and a knee pressed between his shoulders, shoving him down further.

Martyn was about to push himself up with his arms, using his strength advantage to throw Scott off of him, but Martyn froze when he felt something sharp curl around his throat. 

He couldn’t move. He couldn’t even swallow. He could barely even breathe. 

Suddenly the sharp points of crescent bladed scythes were touched against his neck so delicately. Suddenly the sharp claws of a hungry beast wrapped around his throat, pricking the skin above his jugular. One wrong move and she’d slid his throat. One wrong breath and the beast would tear him to ribbons.

A figure above him bent down to whisper in his ear. 

“I win!” Scott chirped brightly. He laughed as he withdrew his fingernails from where he’d curled them around Martyn’s throat. “You really do need more practice. Though I’d be happy to oblige…,” his voice turned sing-songy as he plopped back on the sand, his arms holding him up.

Martyn slowly pushed himself upwards, staring down at the sand where his face had been in utter bafflement. Why had that felt-? Why was he-? Why was his heart beating so fast? Why… did he feel like he’d just been hunted…?

“That- that uh…,” Martyn stammered, not really sure what he wanted to say. “You’re a lot better fighter than I thought you’d be.” He turned his head to look at Scott, pushing himself up so he was sitting on his knees.

“I know,” Scott smiled widely, tipping his head back and forth, “Do I impress you, Martyn?” He smiled and hummed teasingly, his eyes narrowed in a joyful satisfaction. 

“Always,” he breathed, a lot more genuine and heartfelt than he’d meant to. Scott’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. Martyn felt his face flush and he looked down at the sand. Well, he was in this far. “I think you’re amazing.” 

“Thank you…,” Scott said with a shy little smile. A light hint of red dusted his cheeks. He looked… really nice like that.

Martyn shook his head, roughly clearing his throat. “Well um, as- as fun as this was… I was actually referring to- to my gun combat more than my hand-to-hand.”

“Uh huh,” Scott answered with a small smirk, not sounding like he believed him. “Well, maybe I could help you with that as well.” 

“You know how to use a gun?” Martyn asked, more than a little shocked. How… how much did he really know about Scott?

Scott opened his mouth, then closed it. He looked to the side, then looked back at Martyn. “Noooo…?” he admitted, grinning sheepishly. He sighed, rolling his eyes a bit, “To be honest I thought you were still flirting, not that that was a serious question. And now, well… I’m just embarrassed.”

“Oh.” Martyn tried to hide his sigh of relief. It was one thing to just not know that Scott was a capable fighter -he was a tavern keeper who dealt with rowdy drunks all the time, Martyn honestly should have expected it- but it was another thing to not know that Scott was a trained gunman. For some reason they felt different. Martyn felt a grin split his face. “Would-... would you like me to teach you…?”

“Teach me what?” Scott’s eyebrows pinched together for a brief moment, then shot up towards his hairline, “How to use a gun?”

“Yeah,” Martyn grinned, “It’ll be like the time I was taught!”

“When were you taught?” Scott tilted his head.

“I think I was… seven? My parents knew I wanted to be a hunter, so they taught me,” Martyn hummed, looking out at the beach. He could remember the eagerness in his voice when he asked his parents to teach him. He only knew of the dangers through them and the people he lived around, but he knew his heart was calling out to the sea more than anything else.  “I needed practice, like everyone else, but I’m a natural. A crack shot, they’d told me!” He laughed. Shooting a target from far away was much easier than fighting with swords or his bare hands. 

Scott blinked, processing Martyn’s words. He slowly turned his head to Martyn, eyes widening in shock as all sense of his playfulness dropped. “You were a child when you learned how to use those?”

“Yeah…? I wanted to be a hunter, Scott, so I learned early.” Martyn looked at Scott and shrugged, feeling the ginger’s gaze on his skin felt… different. Martyn learned how to use guns to be a hunter, not to– oh. Was Scott thinking Martyn would…? Martyn shook his head and raised his hands up. “But I can’t shoot a person. A sea monster is easy because they’re big and stupid, but a person…?”

Scott had a judgemental look on his face as it scrunched up. He pulled his legs up and wrapped his arms around them, resting his head on it as he sighed. “Ending a person’s life is hard, and I’m happy you haven’t shot anyone, but…,” he trailed off. Martyn leaned closer to Scott as he raised an eyebrow. “Don’t you think it’s a little concerning?”

“What’s concerning?”

“You learned how to shoot things, how to kill things, as a kid,” Scott looked away, gripping his arms tighter as he watched the waves flow in and out. “Every life has a purpose; from you, to me, and even the beasts in the ocean.”

Martyn narrowed his eyes. Exactly what purpose could those monsters serve? Being ocean terrors? An effective way to kill humans and destroy ships? To bring fear in the hearts of children? To kill Ren- Jimmy? Why were there monsters in the ocean? Why should there be? 

“They’re monsters, Scott.” Martyn hissed, anger rising in his voice.

“They’re animals,” Scott hissed back, his face pinching into an expression that was almost pained. “They’re just animals….” 

“They’re heartless, cruel, and always starving.” Martyn huffed, pulling out his gun to examine it under the sunlight. Horrible beasts. Disgusting monsters. Murderers. “They’re such horrible, unnatural beasts that every mechanic in the world works to develop better guns and weapons to kill them all.” 

He didn’t fully notice the way Scott shied away from the gun in his hand. “You’re lucky you don’t need to leave the kingdom to see those ugly things,” Martyn spat.

“Ugly…,” Scott grumbled, turning his head away, like he was offended by the notion. “Well, I’m sure most of them would think the same about you.”

Martyn blinked, giving Scott a double take. Ugly…? 

Scott let out a sigh as he stretched and uncurled his legs and arms to stretch out in front of him. He picked up a small handful of sand and watched it fall through his fingers. “Every life is precious, every life is running on limited time. I’m not an idiot. I know things die. But there’s no reason to cut it shorter than it needs to be. ” He smiled wistfully, tossing the rest of the sand forward. “The sea is… scary, but maybe if you had an open mind, you’d see there’s more to it than monsters.”

Martyn followed Scott’s gaze and stared. Was there anything more to them? Surely not. The fondness in Scott’s voice was hard to believe- but the man has never even seen any beast to Martyn’s knowledge. The fond tone that Scott spoke about those- those monsters with… it honestly made Martyn angry. Those monsters took away the people he cared about. The people he loved. People he cherished. Jimmy, Ren… and so many other innocent people lost their lives to the sea, Lizzie’s parents…. The ocean took all of them, and there was nothing to blame but the monsters that infested it.

“They’re monsters, nothing more than that,” he spat, emotions in his chest wrenching into a tight knot that made it hard to breathe. He swung his arm out to the side, bringing his gun up in front of his chest as he rose to his knees, almost looming over Scott. “I know what they are, Scott, and I know I’m doing all that I can to protect you and the rest of the kingdom from the beasts that would just as quickly swallow you whole as they would crush you into pieces!”

“There’s no need for you to be so hostile about it,” Scott snapped at Martyn, his eyes narrowing into a cold glare that felt like icy daggers stabbing into Martyn’s face. Scott stood up and brushed all the sand from his clothes with a sigh. “I understand.” He walked closer to the water, just enough for the waves to lap against his shoes and tightened his fist, as if preventing to lash out.

Martyn blinked. “Was I-?” he muttered to himself. 

He looked out at Scott standing in the surf. He looked… sad. The guilty feeling in his chest built up once more. 

All of a sudden, Martyn remembered just how happy Scott looked with his birds fluttering around him, with the canary nuzzling his palm. Oh-. Scott was an animal lover…. No wonder he-.

Martyn was messing everything up. First he’d ignored him, and he was pushing Scott away by getting angry. Martyn quickly stood up and ran across the beach towards Scott, “Oh, Scott, I’m sorry–”

Scott turned to look at him, a flat expression on his face.

Martyn felt his heart twist, “I- I’m sorry. I- I didn’t mean to make you feel….”

“Upset?” Scott supplied.

“Yeah…,” Martyn bowed his head. His hand twitched out, reaching for Scott’s but giving up and retreating before he could take it. Martyn turned his head away and bit his lip. “I-... I made you-....”

Scott stepped closer and held out his hand. “No need for that, silly hunter,” he smiled sweetly. Martyn took it almost immediately, surprising them both. Scott let out a chuckle and bumped his shoulder next to Martyn’s. “I’m not mad,” Scott said softly. Martyn believed him. He looked… sad instead. 

“I don’t want you to–”

“You’re just fine.” Scott assured him with a smirk. “It takes a lot more than a simple disagreement to make me actually upset. We’re okay, right?” 

Martyn bashfully nodded, resulting in a wide smile from Scott. Was he… really okay? Or was he just hiding how he felt? For Martyn’s sake? Martyn hoped it was the former. 

Scott put a hand on his chest, giving Martyn’s hand a small squeeze. “Just… try to keep an open mind, alright? The world can be… stranger than you might think.” He smiled a little bashfully, “I might have- a surprise or two… to share, eventually.”

“Like how you can kick my butt in hand to hand?”

Scott’s face split into a wide grin, his eyes lighting up with laughter. “Just like that.”

Martyn felt himself smiling, a laugh escaping him as he squeezed Scott’s hand. Yeah, they were okay.

[squishosaur]

i loev your art style so much and your azujamil comics are so cute <33 do you have any hcs for them that you havent drawn out before ?

uwahh thankies,,, they are everything,, i do have so many hcs for them....

azul acts very confident all the time, but he's insecure about his body. jamil, however, likes to snake his arms around him whenever they're alone and tell him how pretty he is.

jamil likes cooking for azul, if he's feeling nice, you'll find some scalding sands dishes on the lounge menu as weekly specials.

azul's terrified of flying; jamil feels more free in the air. azul will go flying with jamil sometimes. Rarely. but he clings on so tight and won't let go even after they land again. jamil teases him about it, but tends to fly lower so azul's not freaked out.

on the flip side, jamil doesn't know much about the deep sea and is fairly weary of it. if they go out swimming, azul will revert to his mer-form and hold him close for a little while as he adjusts.

i know i just made a comic about azul serenading jamil, but i wanna reiterate that i think he'd play music for him. nothing too crazy, but he'd play piano for him.

azul will make mocktails (since the mostro lounge is at school and he cannot serve alcohol) and name them after jamil. jamil does not appreciate this.

neither is big on pda, but they'll hold hands when they're alone.

when azul is jealous, he will literally do anything to get jamil's attention. Literally anything. he'll make a scene if he has to. jamil thinks this is so embarrassing and tells him that he's going to break up with him.

when jamil's jealous, he'll start plotting things. he has to undermine azul's business plans in secret and plot a murder. he never goes through with this. however, if someone comes on to azul, he might grab him and kiss him on the mouth just to get the message across. azul is More than okay with this.

jamil is multilingual and will randomly call azul both petnames and swears/insults in other languages. azul has to use context clues to find out what it means though.

while i think azul would try and fail to ask jamil out first, i think he'd be the one to propose in the future.

jamil would love thrill rides and haunted houses in order to feel something. azul would act casual about it and start screaming and crying.

their dates would be scarce and would usually be just hanging out to play a strategy game or cooking together. sometimes they watch and discuss movies. mostly, their "dates" are unplanned and involve chasing kalim or floyd or trying to fix problems that they cause ajdndnd

azul knows absolutely Nothing about basketball, but will watch the games and cheer literally any time jamil has the ball. he firmly believes that jamil should be allowed to kill people in this game.

azul likes to compliment jamil and is extremely verbally affectionate. when jamil compliments him though he totally melts.

azul likes their outfits to complement each other, so sometimes jamil will wear silver accessories or azul will wear golden ones.

speaking of clothes, jamil will wind up taking any sort of jacket or long sleeved shirt azul has at Least once. they're a little big though,, azul will take jamil's clothes too (not to wear though) and likes getting his things back from jamil because they "feel/smell like him." jamil finds this so crazy but like Whatever, he guesses.

like he does with other people, jamil will let azul win at things (arguments, games, etc.) azul does not like this and says that he has to take things seriously, only for jamil to beat him at it. either way, he fusses for a little bit.

azul cannot dance. jamil LOVES dancing. he teaches him, but azul is still soso bad. azul prefers ballroom dancing because it looks refined and elegant. jamil indulges him in this but sometimes adds a more hip hop spin to the moves.

azul is Always trying to impress jamil and is always visibly impressed by jamil. jamil does not try to impress azul and does not always make a big show when he is impressed. he will smile, azul swoons at this.

[deathberi]

I wasn't super baby, I was only 5 when it came out and my brother bought it. But I think I played it by myself the first time when I was like 9 or 10. I don't remember how I felt playing it, as I said, my English wasn't the best, but I got drawn into the world and story either way, without knowing details.

And so happy when other OG fans of Clerith exist, I get Remake just made it super easy to fall in love with them, but tiny pixel!Clerith ;;

And I do feel kinda bad for being anime only fan, haha. I just didn't read lots of manga when I was younger, especially not longer ones, so just never started. But I'm making that right now, bought the first out of the three boxes with 20 volumes in it, so I can start anytime and buy the other 2 when I'm done and have the money. : D

(And I'm just now finishing Rebirth for the third time or the last two chapters, I finished all the sidequests earlier (even the last one that was sent from hell, haha. And I just finished watching Aerith's trial in the Temple again and can't stop crying, haha)

//☁️🌏🍓💀

90s babies are not old dont call yourself that jshdjdjs 😂w even as a kid im pretty obsessive with understanding everything related to my favs and i dont really attach to a lot then so really they were one of my very first loves~ i think being long time fans really just make it all the more kind of...exciting? idk the most apt term i suck at english calming at the same time? for us when knowing that there are more of us like that out there <3 and that are still here after all these years

well at least you're beating me in the physical copy department? lol i literally only have just the matching ichiruki covers 😂 kubo's volume cover gaming is really good though so i definitely considered collecting everything before but nahhh it flew out of my priority list since i buy lots of other collectibles anyway. really cool you got the first set now though thats already a lottt~~ must be nice looking at them :3

(nice? or not nice? ToT im still not immuned to the last chapter... i've played it full twice, rewatched the cutscenes endlessly its part of editing >w<... aerith's trial is something i cant get through without making a mess of my face like hnggg that was too...too much my baby girl!!!!!! i still have a few sidequests to go and tbh im not that all in to do the remaining ones yet (lol some T&Y quests) but my latest rebirth achievement would be uhhh i finished the world intel! i havent decided on my next goal for rebirth im not really in a hurry to get the plat, maybe should start on a hard mode playthrough bc i didnt set that at first so i'd get done through the story very quickly >w<)

[segasys]

Me again! This time my own curious mind has led me to ask this question, I remember that your survivor and Hunter were a couple, which made me think: What are your favorite slugcat ships? Would there be a top of which one you like best? It's just curiosity and gossip about this stupid girl who is bored with anxiety, nice night/day :3!

hope you have a nice day/night too!! i love getting asks like these, it makes it easier to share my headcanons and stuff without having to make a post "hey btw i think/my headcanon is..."

i honestly like a lot of ships, its kinda hard to pick a favorite, though here are some that are in my AUs and ill try to pick my tops:

list below, its long

inv-survivor = Reversal!!!! im absolutely feral about these two you have no idea!!! -inv-survivor-rivulet = i dont know if they have a name or not, but i call them PvP and i need propaganda spread!! im still deciding whether i want to add this ship to my main AU or not. they are so dear to me.

gourmand-spearmaster = CreamSoda!!! or better know as kebab, i just dont like kebab, sry. the first ships ive drawn! -theres also Ramune [riv-gorm-spears] but its not really one of my tops anymore :,<

Gourmand-Artificer = your honor, i love them!! ive also added spearmaster in their relationship in my main AU, the relationships in that AU get complex i feel. im sorry but i dont really like barbecue as a ship name, i might call them singularity[bomb] if that hasnt been used yet!!

Hunter-Survivor = Candycane!!! my candycane actually arent in a relationship anymore, they are through some part of my main AU, but they break up :[ i love them to bits though!!

hunter-inv-saint = this is a pretty big ship in one of my other AUs, omg, theyre awesome, angst angst angst. i think this ship is called virus, but i want to find something better for my AU.

some notable ships not in my AUs/still deciding if theyll be in an AU:

Spearmaster-Hunter = I freaking love Loveletter!!! i was going to add it to my main AU or at least have them be QPPs, but i think hunter angst is better hehehe. still havent decided if ill add this to another AU, since i really like CreamSoda, but i dont think it would work to add hunter, since gorm and hunter dont really like eachother.

Artificer-Rivulet = Bathbomb!!!! actually love these two, maybe ill draw something for them!!!

Artificer-Saint = 0-0 [hehehe]. idk what their ship name is, but i might make my own if i add them to an AU, which i think i did plan to.

i like error 404 [inv-night] i just dont really ship them that much since i headcanon them as cousins.

and lastly: monk-saint qpp and monk-night qpp for the win!!!

[sorry this is long lol] and now for my top ships!!!

CreamSoda, Singularity, Reversal, and Virus

[fairy-switchblade]

sorry if youve addressed this and i havent found it yet, but i was reading your post about stone butches transitioning out of stone. i am a femme coming to terms with the possibility i may be a stone femme and i was just wanting to hear others thoughts about what transitioning in and out of a stone femme identity might be like. maybe this doesnt make sense and im overthinking my identity somehow since im already thinking in terms of leaving it before ive even accepted it. as i am now i dont have any reservations about accepting the identity of stone besides somehow hurting or misrepresenting the community by viewing it this way. i wouldnt want to rush leaving stone behind either your post just sparked me to think long term what i may feel and be like. sorry this was probably unreadable, thank you for reading anyway if you did! it was nice to even write it somewhere at all. thank you 🙏 🩷

Hey there! Sorry about the late reply, it’s been an intense few days at work placement.

First of all, no I have not addressed this yet, there’s no need to apologise. The idea of ‘transitioning’ in and out of stone identity, either butch or femme, is an interesting one. It’s a way of acknowledging that accepting and taking on of this label is a process that takes time, as is the release of that same label.

I believe this is a fairly unique process to each of us, as individuals. Heads up I am not stone, but I am partnered to someone who is currently negotiating with their own use of the term. Much of what I can share on this is based on discussion with them, and is drawn therefore from a stone butch experience, not a stone femme experience. I would strongly recommend you reach out to other stone femmes for further support, if you feel confident doing so.

That being said, I feel that considering the ‘lifespan’ of your own stone identity is not an unreasonable thing to consider. This is something which you may feel differently on at different points in your life. It is important to extend compassion to yourself, not judgement, as you navigate this. Some people might arrive at stone identity feeling soothed by it, and more secure within it, more able to function, or be themselves. Other’s will arrive at it with mixed feelings- there is self-knowledge and empowerment in the term, and yet also for some, exhaustion and hurt, and a need to rely on it temporarily. You will know in yourself whether stone feels like a temporary shelter, or home. It is okay if it’s home. I feel like I can’t really stress that enough.

You can know in yourself that you might want to leave stone behind one day, even as you are just embracing the term. It would hurt if you were discussing stone as something that can be ‘cured’ or something that’s wrong with you that you need to get rid of. But it seems clear to me that is not what you’re doing.

I’m really glad you were able to share these thoughts with me. I hope they provided some release, and I sincerely hope my prior post was helpful to you. Good luck with everything, and remember to take your time figuring all of this out.

[like-rain-or-confetti]

hi, Vanity, are ok? Hope so!

well, would linda writing some headcannon of Midnight Mass with John Pruitt and a s/o witch

Ohhh okay okay, I'm going to completely stick with the story but add this side character so MAJOR SPOILERS to anyone who hasn't seen midnight mass and intends to! Im also doing this by memory. I havent watched it since it first came out so if i forget or get something wrong- my bad! I also know nothing about witch craft personally so this is my best guess.

Also I'm good, I'm just going through some health stuff and life changes for the better! I talk about it a few posts down. Thank you for asking ❤️

So this relationship wasn't forseen by either when the young handsome priest arrives to the island for the 'first' time.

Witchcraft isn't actually frowned upon by most- except Bev Keane because she is a bitch and everything is beneath her. But no witch craft isn't really known to if it works or doesn't but you seem nice enough so maybe you aren't any harm right?

But back to the handsome priest man who is focused on bringing the community together in worship...kinda. mostly. It's a goal of his.

So he originally doesn't think much of the witch craft stuff. He's a believer in the freedom to choose ones own belief system. Unlike some certain church members -COUGH-

He's even rather fascinated by it along with the Sheriff who knows what it's like to be deemed an outcast before you so much as step through the door. Both passionate in the pursuit of knowledge and becomes quite the therapeutic relationship. A friend who has compassion without judgement and a friend who takes pride in the pursuit of knowledge and constant interest in the world around him.

The small community really brings everyone together just like small communities do.

Things begin to change between you and the priest, John Pruitt. He was like an old soul you couldn't help but be drawn to with eyes full of life-long pain despite his young appearance. Yet he still saw beauty in the present day. He's mystifying and comforting. The days of time together become more frequent as time goes on.

You notice he's rather secretive. He appeared as though an open book but you couldn't help the feeling you were only getting half of the story.

Things were getting strange around the island. Cats turning up dead on the beach put most if not all on edge of a potential virus but all is reassured by John who is zoning his focus on newly returned Riley who needs mandatory AA meetings as a part of his release.

John expresses his concern about poor old Mildred Gunning, who was slipping away with every day. He was told she was very passionate about her religion after all before she got too sick to do so. You thought it a major kindness and very much like John to take mass to Mildred. A noble thing indeed.

Bev Keane seems to have her sights on Joe, his dog, and the Sheriff with her snarky comments. Naturally, when she couldn't get a reaction from Erin or the others, her sights zoned back to you and the temptations you offered being in bad faith.

Despite how loyal Bev is to John. John supports you entirely, insisting you paid her comments no mind after a heart to heart about your own religious beliefs.

Your look into witchcraft was not with ill intent or an attack on God. It was merely that God had given you the ability to reach out and acknowledge other deities. That God was not one but many and like the island prayed and went to mass, you gave these deities offerings and love just the same. You saw beauty and magic within the crystals you kept. Like religion helped them, witch craft healed what was needed in your soul.

That night, you and John had your first kiss. You had never felt more connected to a man or anyone the way you had connected to him.

Things get even weirder on the island. You witnessed a girl who was wheelchair bound, walk again. Mildred gunning was not only physically looking better -and definitely a little younger as nuts as that sounded- she was also very much more aware of her surroundings. None of this should be possible. Not to mention Sarah Gunning has called you to her home to show you blood samples literally explode. She asked you of you had any ideas. It was a long shot but maybe a witch would know. You had seen many coincidences that could be only that or magic. You had seen the down right bizarre on the island but nothing prepared you for that moment that blood sample shattered and sizzled under the sunlight of the window. Your faith told you that there were simply things in this world people would never understand but fear in your gut told you that you didn't want to know the answers sometimes. What reasoning could there be to make that sight any less crazy?

You voiced all of this to John, who- as always sat, listened entirely and didn't try to talk you out of things you claimed to see or think. Instead, he hoped to provide comfort for those things. He didn't try to give answers for these things and will them away. In hindsight, maybe it wasn't so much a kindness that he didn't give you answers.

Mildred was getting younger by the day. Riley disappeared, and Erin, already mourning her baby's loss, insisted that Riley was dead. That he burned to dust in front of her and that John Pruitt wasn't to be trusted. That last part somehow became the least believable out of all of that, ironically. At least until the angel came.

Or at least John called that thing that. An angel as well as a miracle asking the church to not be afraid... but you were. You were more terrified of anything, and for the first time, you finally saw that other side of John you had since talked yourself out of believing existed. Many had secrets, but very few came in the form of something that looked to be an 8 foot tall monster. Mildred seemed to have the same experience at the very same time.

Things went to hell after that. The bloodshed, the poisonings, the death. It was like a ripple effect, threatening to wipe out the already very small population of people.

Sarah's death is what made John see what he had done and only then on the church stairs as the monster soared the sky looking for its next victim did John explain himself to you and a now young Mildred.

John and Mildred had a secret love affair. Sarah was the product of that affair, Mildred's deceased husband having no idea nor did Sarah until her last night but John and Mildred knew.

John saw how Mildred's condition was wasting away at her, and on top of that, he knew his own condition had begun to eat away at him too. He was attacked by the angeland when he awoke. He was restored. So he bribed the being, smuggled it back with him to the island for no more death or sickness. Bev always saw it as a new way of life but John wasn't interested in that. He did it for Mildred and Sarah and eventually, he did it for you, too.

You were not a part of the plan. You were a gift from God, John believed. A wonderful person who was young and passionate but now he felt he had been greedy and has robbed you of your years. You had a whole life to live before him and John got greedy and wanted to save you from a necessary evil that was only going to come that much quicker if you didnt survive. With every passing minute that seemed less and less likely.

He apologised constantly and even Mildred felt pain for you. She understood she and John had taken borrowed time that wasn't theirs to take and now those so young like the sheriff's son, Sarah' their own daughter and possibly you and every other young person on this island no longer had a future.

John said he wanted to try, to at least try and give you one last gift as a thanks and prove of his love. To help you get off the island. It was a long shot but he'd go through hell and high water just for that small chance that you'd live and leave this all behind. You hadn't died yet. The blood would exit your existence eventually.

You found Lisa, the girl who could suddenly walk and Riley's younger brother. The three of you getting off the island and watching the sun come up as the island went up in flames. A flutter of hope emerging when Lisa said the words. "I can't feel my legs." A bittersweet sign of a future.

You never spoke a word of what happened on the island but when you sought those deities at night- you asked them to take care of those lost souls from the island and forgive them if nothing else. No one more than John Pruitt.

[piplupod]

i drew the softest bramwell (feat. Millie) I've quite possibly ever drawn and I want to share it but it's not cleaned up yet so I dont want to put it up on my other blog so ,,, I'll put it under the readmore here hehe

i havent drawn Bram in so long (like ... since May woagh) so this was rly nice to get back to my favourite lad :]

also im trying to come up with a signature for my art but I can't decide how I want it to look ;-; Chase has been signing all of his drawings w his name though so fjdklsl he's got his own signature now I guess

look how nice his signature is though 😭 how do i do something like this goldamn

also i get so worried every time i draw millie and bramwell together bc i worry ppl will think its smth fucked up but he is like a father figure to her fhfkdl and i feel like it probably comes across clearly in my sketches so ... i think perhaps i am just paranoid :'o)

[finagled]

absent but busy

life never seems to slow down to let me catch my breath, so ive been busy trying to keep things going!

this has been a hellish year but also a spectacular one in so many ways. my dad’s death has shattered me tbh, im just not the same person i was before he left and life will never ever be the same with him gone. as somebody who already struggles with identity issues, i had a real hard time knowing how in the world i was supposed to keep going without his input and support. he always saw right through me and could point out things about me i wasnt even aware of yet, but he was always spot on, too. bouncing my ideas off of him is how i learned to human. im coming to realize i loved to succeed and experience so i could tell him and listen to how he loved to hear about it. with him gone, ive felt a sense of emptiness with everything.

im trying to hold on to what he’s taught me. he gave me so many lessons on how to be a person, a good person. he played devils advocate so id learn how to fight for what i knew to be true, and to reevaluate my stance if i couldn’t. he taught me how to treat other people, how every stranger deserves kindness. he taught me that you can be wrong, and that sometimes being wrong is a beautiful thing, because then you learn what’s right. he taught me nothing is worth sacrificing your morals.

the answer to where to find this person now is that now, i have to be this person. the only way for those things about him to live on is if i perpetuate them in my own life. im trying so hard to do this. its not going easy. im told over and over again that im smart, that i work hard, that im good with people, and yet my success has not materialized no matter what i’ve done to secure it. i think, if i just had mental health care and meds, if i could just see a doctor, then id be so great. but i can’t think like that. whether that’s true or not and that’s the only thing in the way between me and living like i feel like im meant to, it doesn’t matter. trying to get government assistance, at least in this state, feels impossible. i dont have the energy to keep hoping they’re going to help. im frustrated to come to the conclusion that i am going to have to metaphorically “pick myself up by the bootstraps” and find a way to push forward in the meantime.

i know im intelligent and have skills that can genuinely and directly help people, because ive done it before. its taken a really long time to have confidence in myself about anything. but i need to start, and then do something with it, because im wasting time waiting for help to arrive.

this is a big ol ramble but it feels good to have the energy to write stuff up. vari and i have been working real hard this past year trying to get the house and our lives set up in a way that will set us both up for success. we’re slowly getting a handle on chores and bills, and our mental health is improving. im slowly pulling all the tangled yarn apart in my brain and getting things sorted.

they took me off adderall and onto strattera, which i actually dont mind. ive heard the medication can precipitate manic episodes in bipolar individuals though, so i wonder if i like it because of that. im depressed so often and its been so long since hypomania, that i really done mind when i wake up with the excess energy and vigor. it doesnt feel extreme like hypomania, more like just having gusto for the day. ill have to keep an eye on it more since its only been about three weeks, but im grateful i havent lost much progress from getting off adderall. the side effects aren’t nearly as powerful either, which is nice.

so im trying. i have too many people i should be getting back to with messages so if youre one of them, im sorry. theres a million things going on and only so much energy each day, but ive drawn up some routines that i hope will encourage me to do more stuff throughout the day other than just chores and sims ;)

thanks to anyone for reading :3

[nuclearforest]

Fanfic writer asks!

34. How much of your personal life/experience do you include in your fics?

51. Does what you like to write differ from what you like to read?

56. Are there any fics that you would change or rewrite if given the chance?

74. Do you have a fic you wish got a bit more love?

OWO

Thank you for the asks friend!!

34. Generally not much? Idk, I write more about things I think I'd like to experience and havent yet; things that seem nice and ghibli-esque. I'd like to settle down peacefully.

On the other hand, I've been a lot of places and seen quite a few things, regardless of how young I am. So like, I guess tend to use a lot of knowledge for constructing works about what I long for.

My mental train is constantly pulling into simp central station.

51. Lmao this one is kinda funny because I'm out here writing werewolf smut and reading (generally historical) nonfiction on science and accident history. Most recent finished book was a recount if the Idaho Falls SL-1 incident.

I used to have a monstrous appetite for fiction and now I don't read nearly so much. Been trying to convince myself to read Vampire Hunter D for a friend but I bought the book and have not gotten thru the first chapter lol.

56. Hard to say? Sometimes I go back and look at One Dog Night and I know I've gotten better but there's still something about leaving it as-is that keeps me from going back. It's the display of progress, I think.

And I also suppose I'd like to lengthen and bulk up A Month to Love a Werewolf. It just deserves more. And it's almost time for the holiday season again.

But at the end of the day: I have no time to fix any of it up lol. Those stories have been told and I have SO MANY ideas spinning around my head that I gotta tend to. The eternal struggle.

74. I love attention OK. Like. I want more attention on everything lmao. But that said!

Une Nuit Chien.

Like, it's another feel good One Dog Night but with @rotten-hearts-sharp-teeth 's lovely OC Barrett (I love him to bits and cannot overstate how much). I mean, it also taught me a few more quirks and ideas and at the end of the day I got my newest, sweetest OC out of it. The fae Rosemary Briar (whose personality is directly drawn from the reader personality in Une Nuit Chien). I love her to bits and I would just really appreciate if I could get folks in the same boat lol. Well, also the Barrett simp boat. I promise I'm trying.

[happiiest]

😧

[ace-aro-fandroid]

Hi, i have so so many asks in my inbox and i cant respond to them individually so ill just make one post and go

Thank you to every person who messaged me nice things about the blog, or who messaged me asking if im okay. Yall are super nice and i appreciate it.

Sorry i disappeared. I just havent had the energy or time for this blog. I'm glad yall enjoy the content i already posted though

Im okay. Got correctly diagnosed and medicated after 7 years of worthless fucking doctors ruining my life. Got commonlaw married. My cat died. I got a job as a server and I teach voice lessons on the side, which lets me pay my bills AND save money to buy land for the landback plan. Got a neat tattoo. I was part of the Pfizer vaccine trial back when it was being made, so as a part of that I got vaccinated very early and I'll also be getting the booster shot very soon. I live in an apartment and my living situation is stable. I'm writing music and me and my friends are attempting to start a little band. I'm about to start EMDR for the first time, and after that I'll start poledancing classes. I'm writing a comic and hopefully one day I'll be able to get it drawn and published. I've fundamentally changed as a person in so many ways, mostly good, but some bad. Some days im filled with the warmest exhilarating joy from just being me, some days i want to erase myself entirely. Life is constantly exhausting, and the noise of being alive is so loud that i constantly ache, and sometimes I can barely handle it but almost every day I get to come home, shower, put on warm and dry clothes, eat a meal i cooked and am proud of, and watch some silly little show with my partner, who is the love of my life.

So i guess if youre anything like me, if you were abused, if you were raised in a cult, if you've been mentally ill since you were conscious, if you grew up queer in a violently anti-queer environment, if you never got to just be a fucking kid, if you feel like your past and future were stolen from you before you even realized who you were, then please please keep going. Even if you feel like you aren't managing, remember that you're still breathing, and maybe you're BARELY managing, but you're managing. And you're fighting. And as long as you're still fucking breathing then you're still fighting. And remember that the existence of all the worst days PROVES the existence of the best days. Your ability to feel crushing, suffocating rage and sorrow PROVES your ability to feel soaring joy and pride one day, even if you can't right now.

I know this might seem all melodramatic and out of left field just coming out of nowhere on a Data fan blog, but this is the only social media i have, and this is where i reach the most people, so i wanna say it all here. Consider this a sign if you're looking for one. Keep going, you'll have good things someday. You will. You will. You will.

I hope everyone that reads this has something very cozy and wonderful happen to them today, and i hope things get better for everyone very soon.

[volfoss]

how about ranking bucciarati's team?

regret to inform you that ur gonna get a very long answer bc i have passionate feelings about them all! also trish is in this bc she is part of the team and no one will tell me otherwise and will also include some rambling bc it is me and i have so many feelings towards these characters and none of them r cohesive

under the cut just in case (post writing yes it was long)

Giorno Giovanna:

way way more complex than ppl normally give him credit for (i will not go into feelings on how a majority of the fandom treats him unless ppl want me to then i will in fact make a very long ranty post and will not be stopped)

mildly op (esp at the beginning with how hes kind of able to just use his stand really well w no problems altho i think thats true of most of the jojos that we have seen animated?)

i am emotionally attached to him and want to give him a big hug

hes just a kinda goofy kid and is maybe a bit not good with figuring out hey this is a semi dangerous situation maybe i shouldnt be taunting him (leaky eye luca for example)

has the actual best theme

i love how he works off the rest of the team so well (even w members who do not like him)

is in my top 3 jojos i love this kid sm i would adopt him if he was real

7/10

Bruno Bucciarati:

the fucking way his character develops from licky man to best dad material is my favorite thing

his outfit is so so so good i would die to wear it

in general this man is one of my fave jojos characters and i get a lot of comfort from him

hes just really neat and has a good taste in music

he did his fucking best and i will always love him for that

imo the way that his death was drawn out was genuinely one of the most heartbreaking deaths in the entire series and fucks me up each time i think of it

i feel like he really is the one to hold the team together in a way that everyone feels cared for and saved

def has a savior complex tho for sure

dilf but im ace

also manga superiority bc he either makes the stupidest faces or looks very nice (anime has a lot of weird animation in regards to his face) and also because its lingerie there instead of a tattoo that changes thickness and placement every second

10/10

Leone Abbacchio:

guilty pleasure liking man

i am obsessed with his vibes and wish to become him

i cannot physically express just how much i love him but hes one of my faves of all time (not obvious by my theme at all wdym)

i miss his manga palette but also the colored manga isnt my beloved but also black lipstick abba

hot take maybe but anime abba looks better than manga minus the lipstick debacle

hes so so tall and i will steal his height in a nice way

his past man his past it fucks me up

his death fucks me up normally but when i was rewatching recently, i saw he gave this tiny lil smile after helping the kids get their ball and i could not take it anymore

him and brunos relationship (canonically and out of canon too) is one of my favorites in the series

also fandom hot take as i guess i am doing those for everyone- but ppl either have him as cosntantly trying to murder giorno or being like good son and v out of character, and it is really weird? not sayign that ill do better when i write them but also like im convinced some ppl havent seen the show or smth

i will steal both him and bruno and marry them both <3

this man is beloved i love him to death

10/10

Pannacotta Fugo:

i cannot spell his first name to save my life

also fandom take- ppl make him constantly only angry boy all the time and it really irks me. ik araki did not give him 2 much to work w in terms of canon personality but its frustrating

the light novel purple haze feedback is so so so good and adds sm to his character and i really like it for that!

fugo is one of those that imo deserves a lot and didnt get that

genuinely the vibes between how he treats narancia is v interesting to me, like its clear he cares about nara but nara not doing great w math really frustrates him

i love their interactions and how he is genuinely a kind person at times

the manga colors r superior here, my strawberry boy <3

i just really love and appreciate him a lot and wish that ppl gave him more love

i keep getting assigned him on kin quizzes

very smart good boy

ALSO ok fugo did not do any wrong by leaving

unsure if thats a hot take but i genuinely dont blame the character one bit for leaving and again purple haze feedback really delves into that and why he did it

if ur a fugo fan go read it

his past is really upsetting esp in the anime i will cry over it

his stand is adorable and i wanna hug it

his vibes r fun and i wanna gift him strawberry dangly earrings

8/10

Narancia Ghirga:

this boy i am also adopting (i am adopting most of them sorry)

i really hate how ppl act as if hes stupid bc bad math skills do not equal stupid like did ppl not see the fight w formaggio??

the way he just fucking dove into the water after the boat and how brunos face went all soft and happy it will never not make me cry

he is constnatnly making me wanna cry if i think too much about him for 2 seconds i love him sm

how can anyone not adore him when he set an entire street on fire yk

hes just happy despite his past and it makes me sad i love nara sm

torture dance is one of my favorite memes from the show

ALSO ok the way he died so suddenly absolutely broke me bc the remaining team members r really just seeing everyone die in front of them so quickly

his goofy and laid back moments r my fave

i love just how loyal and caring he is to his friends

his stand is really cool and again the fight w formaggio was so fun to watch

8/10

Guido Mista:

probably my least favorite member of the team for a semi good reason:

the jokes towards trish are really really uncomfy and how fugo doesnt wanna be involved but he is pushing him to do something that makes him uncomfortable did not make me like him a lot

hes goofy but not goofy enough for me to be ok with the repeated jokes about that esp in the body swap episode (ik it was supposed to be funny but it just felt off)

his vibes r good but i wish we got to see his hair

the fandom interpretation is normally pretty good of him overall?

despite not loving him a lot, i really enjoying writing for him (one day might open up headcanon requests or smth but unsure)

hes someone id wanna watch movies w but his taste in movies and mine r very different

love how he and his stand get along

honestly has very very good comedic potential

i really like how he and giorno interact as the series goes on (in a platonic way i need to clarify that i love their friendship)

again him in purple haze feedback was really interesting

probably a 5/10?

Trish Una:

beloved and deserved better

her first outfit in the manga > outfit in the anime

actually in general i believe in manga trish superiority like her hair in the manga looks so cool

her stand her stand her stand i love sm

if u dont include trish in the group i am murdering u <3

HER CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT!!!! IS SO GOOD!!!!!!

fandom gripe is how people either pretend she does not exist or has the trish first introduction thing where shes using her defense mechanisms and acting a bit spoiled

OK but her in purple haze feedback!!! mild spoilers but how bruno was taking care of her post the ending of vento aureo makes me so happy each time i think of it

very mad that she canonically didnt really get an ending and yet again PHF my beloved actually gave her that

how spice girl starts out as a stand thats helping her thru a very stressful situation is so cool and i love it

DAD BRUNO DAD BRUNO DAD BRUNO *frothes at the mouth*

but more seriously how she leans on bruno and begins 2 trust him and nearly point blank is referring to him as a father figure always fucks me up

esp because of the resulting fight afterwards

and the very ending of the arc that ends w bruno being like bye gonna go in the clouds and look ethereal now, oh man it makes me so sad

bc giorno is the only one that knew what happened and people that were closer to bruno due to knowing him longer didnt

i wanna see how trish coped w that personally

despite being introduced not at the beginning i think her arc and character in general were as well paced as it could be!

9/10

finally done! sorry that took so long but oh man i have so many feelings towards these guys its not even funny

[silverpaintedstars]

Well, here’s a first chapter for y’all! Disclaimer it’s a little long, so be prepared for scrolling. I had a lot of fun writing this one

(if you havent read the prologue might wanna do that)

Chapter One: A Meal, An Encounter, and A Walk

He should be dead.

Somehow, though, he was alive.

But it felt like the opposite.

There was the left-over pain from the shadows, and on top of that, his face stung terribly. But he was alive, and he’d take that. Elliot didn’t open his eyes yet, still getting used to the fact that there was more life to live, and how he was going to use it.

It felt like he was laying on grass, or something of the likes. At any rate it was quiet, and he needed this moment of peace. He was lucky to snag them whenever he could, few and far between.

Finally he groaned and wrenched his eyes open. Grey sky greeted him overhead. He was laying on damp brush, rough and overgrown. Not too far from his original guess. A few trees dotted the land around, but he saw no other living form on this desolate wasteland.

Mustering all his energy, he slowly sat up, his head throbbing from the effort. He still had his traveling cloak over his shoulders, but whoever had put him here didn’t think to give him a bag or something?

Whoever had put him here…

Elliot looked around, then yelped.

On a rather large rock to his left, a black-clad figure sat, watching him. He wore a rather curious black mask around his eyes. A few strands of white hair peeked out from under his black hood. A scarf waved in the breeze, and a sword was buckled at his side.

All in all, he looked quite impressive, and like he could kill Elliot any second.

The black-cloaked young man quirked a small smile, his eyes completely concealed so Elliot couldn’t see any emotion from there. Clearly he knew Elliot had seen him but made no move towards his sword.

Elliot remained perfectly still, eyes wide and heart thumping. Did this person bring him here? Or simply stumble upon him? Not knowing made him feel even more helpless.

After a moment of the two staring at each other, the young man deftly hopped off his rock and strode towards Elliot, quickly closing the few yards between them. His boots flattened the tall grass, forming a temporary path.

Elliot swallowed, knowing he should run, but he was half curious what this stranger wanted, plus he doubted he could run faster.

The stranger stopped right in front of Elliot, who was still on the ground, staring up at him.

What he could see of his face betrayed no emotion as he reached a hand down, in the direction of his sheathed sword.

Elliot squeezed his eyes shut, frantically trying to shuffle back in the process. But when he heard no telltale shhhk of the weapon being drawn, he cautiously opened his eyes again.

A grey-gloved hand was outstretched in front of him.

Confused, ELliot looked back up at the stranger, who nodded his head towards his hand.

After a moment's hesitation, Ellliot limply grabbed it, his joints popping as the stranger pulled him to standing. Elliot dusted himself off, wobbling a bit. His face still hurt and he was terribly sore, but it was something he could bear to live with.

“Careful, traveler. Might get stepped on down there,” the stranger said. His voice didn’t quite match the rest of his outward appearance. Lower, a little hesitant but still confident. Elliot didn’t yet know if he could trust this stranger, but a part of him very much wanted to.

“Uh--em--tha-thank you,” Elliot warbled out, rubbing at his hands.

The stranger tipped his head slightly to the left. “And you are welcome.”

“Wh-who are you?” Elliot asked, knowing that stereotypical question had to be asked at some point.

“Around here you can call me Reaper.”

Elliot blinked. “Around here?”

“Yes.” He offered no further explanation. “I trust you are in need of food?”

Elliot hadn’t gotten there in his train of thought yet, but when it came around he found he was quite ready to board the car of food. His stomach grumbled hard when he found that inside this car were piles of food-breads, fruits, soups, and sweets. “Yes,” he said aloud, adding a hasty, ‘sir,” because it sounded safer.

Reaper smiled, pulling a wrapped parcel out of a bag hidden under his cloak. Inside were contents that added more memories to his car of food. A loaf of bread with a bit already broken off, a chunk of cheese, and an apple. He sat on the hard ground in one swift motion, crossing his legs underneath him and spreading the food on the paper, placing it on the ground.

Elliot clumsily sat across from Reaper, hungrily eying the food as more items filled his car as he looked at them.

Reaper tilted his head, as if studying him. “Go on.”

Elliot grabbed at the bread, tearing a hunk off and stuffing it in his mouth. He tried to go slow, act like he had some idea of manners, but the food tasted so good in comparison to what he was used to. Fresh bread--a rare thing for him. He was more used to barren soups, thin, watery things. This tasted a thousand times better, and Elliot felt himself feeling a sense of peace--despite dining with a stranger.

“So tell me,” Reaper said, watching Elliot eat, “how a High Elf like you wound up sixty miles from Orlem.”

He was that far away?

Elliot glanced down at his left hand, which bore the mark of a High Elf--black swirls along the side. He rubbed it. “I don’t know,” he said truthfully. So then, Reaper hadn’t brought him here? Just...found him? He reached for the apple and took a meek bite, suddenly feeling uncomfortable.

“Quite a scar,” Reaper said after a few more minutes of almost quiet, save Elliot’s chewing.

Elliot trailed a finger along the ridge, not trusting himself to be able to say anything. He ducked his head, letting his long hair hang over his face. He had finished eating and stared down at the ground, his head aching not just from physical wounds, but from memories triggered by it. Terrible memories. He willed them away, but it didn’t really go away. Just retreated until another vulnerable moment.

Why was he here? He was certain his father--no, the king--had killed him. He didn’t deserve the title father anymore. Elliot could bear king but not father.

And who was Reaper? Why was a random stranger being so kind to this small Elf boy? Elliot didn’t deserve this. He’d never even had someone really be nice to him before. Except Moss. But she was gone.

“Wh-where are we?” he asked Reaper, dragging himself out from his maze of thoughts.

“About a mile from Holden,” Reaper answered.

Holden. A town. Elliot had never been there, his few leavings of Orlem, the capital of Lucero, north rather than east, where Holden lay. He’d studied the geography of Lucero and the neighboring kingdoms, Chexon and Andromarche, before, so he vaguely knew the rough area.

What was so important about Holden? Was there a reason he had woken up here? Or was it simply...more convenient? He could think of plenty of wasteland around Orlem that would’ve suited the same need, but was closer.

“So…” Elliot started, trying to order his thoughts. “You--found me?”

Reaper nodded. “I was headed to Holden and came upon you. I couldn’t exactly leave someone in your, ah, condition.” For some reason Elliot got the feeling he didn’t mean his wounds.

Reaper rubbed his neck in an almost grabbing way. “To put it this way--most you meet will not sympathize with you. Since Loot has the throne, life has been difficult for most people, from cause of Elves.”

Oh. Elliot let that sink in. Because...of his father, people just associated elves with bad? And Reaper didn’t even know his father was the king.

“You’re lucky I found you,” Reaper added, snapping a twig in his gloved hands and making Elliot jump.

The world suddenly seemed a very messy place, and he’d been thrust in headfirst with no warning. He wasn’t quite sure what to do or say, so he just took another bite of bread.

“Now I know you probably don’t completely trust me,” Reaper continued, “and you just met me twenty or so minutes ago, but we can’t stay here very long. Benedons roam these parts, but the closer we move to Holden, the safer we are.”

Elliot definitely didn’t want to have to encounter a Benedon, a fanged, sharp-clawed creature. And there was a part that desperately wanted to trust Reaper. If he’d wanted to kill him, he could’ve. Elliot didn’t doubt that. But he hadn’t--and he’d given him food. So he had at least one good reason to trust him. But was it enough? He didn’t know who lay behind the mask. For all he knew, they were nowhere near Holden and Reaper was really leading him to his death.

He could never know.

But there was only one way to truly be sure.

“Okay,” he said. “I’ll go.”

“Good,” Reaper said, looking around. “Because I doubt you have a choice.” He looked back at Elliot. “Rest a while longer--you don’t yet look strong. Then we will leave.”

Elliot nodded, wondering how he was supposed to rest.

Turns out he didn’t have to think about it, for he lay back in the grass and promptly fell asleep.

He woke up some time later to see Reaper anxiously studying the sky, where the grey had grown darker. He hadn’t noticed Elliot was awake.

Slowly he sat up, rubbing the cloud from his eyes and head. Reaper looked over and saw him. “Good, you’re awake,” he said. “We should be off. If it stays clear we should make it before nightfall, but it looks like storms. Though I know a shelter if we need it.”

Elliot listened to his words in silence. When Reaper had finished he made his way to standing with an amount of effort. His legs were sore and his head began to hurt again, but he made it. Reaper nodded.

“You seem well enough to walk. You feel so?” he asked, shifting the sword scabbard around his waist.

“I-I think so,” Elliot repeated, trying to convince himself that the words were true.

“Then off we will be,” Reaper replied with a readiness to his voice that Elliot couldn’t quite match.

They began to walk east, though it was hard to tell with the clouded sky, but Reaper seemed to know the direction, which didn’t really surprise Elliot. His strength still was weak, but he managed to get in a groove to walk, heaving breaths but refusing to ask for a rest, wanting to prove he could do this.

Yeah, well, he wasn't convincing himself.

At all.

They walked in silence, Reaper still kept looking at the sky, making Elliot start to worry himself if they would get caught in the rain. They had been walking for about forty-five minutes when Elliot felt it.

A drop of wet.

At first he thought it was a bead of sweat from how hard he was pushing himself, but when he felt another, he looked up, confused. Another drop hit him right between the eyes. “Um-eh-Reaper?” he said in a quiet tone. Reaper didn’t hear him. “R-reaper?”

Reaper looked at him. “Yes?” He wouldn’t feel the rain with his hood and cloak, Elliot figured.

Elliot opened his mouth to speak, when the whole sky opened up. He was drenched in approximately twenty one seconds.

Reaper let out a frustrated huff of air, the first time Elliot saw him drop the calm facade. “Come on--there’s a place just over this next way.”

“How far?” Elliot asked, but was lost in the torrent. He followed Reaper, almost running in the rain. His cloak was soaked through, his hair dripping rain in his eyes. He could barely see ten feet ahead of him, but he could see Reaper’s scarf, and followed that blindly like a lighthouse on a ravaging sea.

He squinted, rainwater running into his eyes and his strength almost completely gone, but if Reaper promised shelter--he would push himself as much as he could to get to it and out of this rain.

Finally he saw a blur of yellow. He wiped his eyes and it focused into a small building that was just coming into view from behind a small hill. “I-is that it?” he had to pretty much shout to Reaper over the wet.

“Yes,” Reaper called back. “We will stop there.”

Elliot let out a breath of relief. Finally, he could rest. He could stop and maybe, just maybe, feel safe. Of course, that was making a rather large assumption, but one could dream, couldn’t they? If you weren’t even safe enough to dream, then you were truly cut off from your largest freedom.

Then a crack of lightning struck somewhere close and he jumped, knocked from his thoughts yet again, remembering that he was still in the middle of a storm.

The building--or whatever--was closer now, and thanks to the light from within, he could make out Reaper, the clouds completely snuffing out the natural light. It wasn’t quite nighttime yet, but it was darkening towards it.

Elliot wrapped his dripping cloak around himself, utterly miserable in the wet, feeling like a cat out here. Finally, finally, he and Reaper stepped onto the small porch of the shack, sheltered after what felt like an eternity.

Reaper threw his soaked hood back, his white-grey hair also dripping into his black mask, but he kept that on. “We may have to stay here through the night,” he told Elliot, looking out at the desolate, wet land around. “Walking around in this isn’t quite my fancy, though we are not far from Holden.”

Elliot only nodded, trying to peer through one of the windows that opened onto the porch, but there was a cloth thrown across it on the inside, blocking his view. “What is this place?” he asked Reaper.

“Think of it like an inn for us...vagabonds,” Reaper said. “But less ravish.”

“Oh.” Vagabonds? Was he considered that now? Reaper definitely fit that category, at least from the time he’d known him. But he wouldn’t have labeled himself one before, but maybe now.

“Well then,” Reaper said, wringing the end of his cloak off and dripping into small puddles on the ground, “shall we go inside?”

Elliot definitely had no idea what to expect in this ‘inn for vagabonds’, in Reaper’s terms. But he supposed he would have no idea what to expect of anything he encountered from here on out.

“I-I guess we will,” he said, swallowing and moistening his throat, ironically enough the only part that seemed dry.

Reaper opened the wooden door, and it whined on the hinges. Then he and Elliot stepped inside, out of the external terrors, and into the internal mysteries.

[zmayadw]

Evening to all :)

Time for the next part :)

Have a nice evening :)

CALL OF THE RAVEN

PART 10

I woke up with a terrible taste in my mouth. I had no clue what time was it, but the sun was out already, making me squint my eyes. I got in sitting position slowly, banging in my head intensifing with every move i made. Ugh, i'm never drinking again, i scolded myself. Squinting, I focused on the little alarm clock that was on the night stand. 10.34. Whoa, i cant remember the last time i slept this long. I got up from the bed and went to the bathroom. I filled the glass with wather, rinsing my mouth a few times before gulping down two glasses. My stomach growled at it, i just hoped not to throw up .Taking a shower would be a wise thing to do, so i just threw the clothes i had off and entered the shower. The warm water felt good, i just let it pour over me for a while. I wrapped myself in the towel taking some painkillers for the headache. Getting back to the room, i dressed up, and sat on the bed. I felt a bit better, but still not enough. Coffee, i tought, thats what i need now. I got up, going for the purse i threw on the floor when i got in, searching for my phone. Shit, i cursed, it wsnt there. I checked every pocket, even Jake's hoodie, but my phone was nowhere to be found. Crap, i probably left it at a the Aurora last night, when Jessy and me wer taking pictures. Or at lest i hoped so. Well, i was going for coffee, so i could stop at the Aurora eitherway. I grabbed my backpack with drawing stuff. Who knows, i might be up for some drawing, no matter I still felt woozy from last night drinking. I putted my sneakers on, grabed my stuff and car keys. Walking wasnt an option this time, i wasnt feeling well enough for it.

When i parked my car infront of the Aurora, I saw Dan's car was still there. I smiled as i left the car, guess i wasnt the only one sleeping late today. I hoped Phil was there already, and my phone too. I entered the Aurora, relieved at the sight of Phil behind the bar. I was washed with the smell of coffee, and as i neared the bar, I pleadingly said to him, sitting on the stool „Please, please, please, tell me i'm not wrong and that is coffee i can smell.“ Phil turned arround , not noticing me when i entered. He grinned at me „You are most definitly right! Would you like some?“ „Yes, pretty please.“ I said, as i putted my hand on the bar, and leaned my head on it as on a pillow. Phil chuckled at me „Want any sugar with it? Or milk?“ „Yes, please.“ I replied, and he vanished through the storage doors. He returned with a big cup of coffe putting it infront of me. I rised my head, took the cup, taking a deep breath of its smell, before taking a big sip of it. „Thanks, Phill, you're my saviour:“ i smiled at him as i settled it back on the bar. „Here to help.“ He said, winking. „Rough night?“ he asked teasingly. „Oh, i dont know how you can be so cheerful.“ I started „I feel like a truck hit me lastnight.“ He laughed „Practice to perfection.“ „I think i would need years of practice to be even close to that kind of perfection!“ i said, making a skeptical face. He smiled at me „So, to what do i owe the pleasure?“ he asked. „Dont get me wrong, im glad to see you“ he said, that devilish spark in his eyes again „But i doubt you came just to see me.“ „You caught me.“ I said, even tho it was nice seeing him. „I was hoping that i might have left my phone here yesterday.“ He shook his head at me, crouching down searchin for a few seconds under the bar, giving me my phone as he got up. „Better be carefull next time, good thing i noticed it as you left.“ „Yay, thanks Phil, again.“ I told him, giving him a big smile. „I owe you big time! Both for the phone, and coffee.“ His phone rang then „Sorry business calling. Be right back“ he said, answering his phone and going through the storage door. I checked my phone with him gone, finding out few missed calls and messages from Jessy. She was worried i havent answered her jet, so i decided to call her while waiting for Phil. The tone barely sugested it rang when Jessy's voice boomed from the other side. „Finaly! Do you know how worried i have been? Are you allright? Where wer you? Why didnt you answer me before?“ It made me smile a bit, her worrying for me like that was so sweet. „Im sooooo sorry Jessy“ i said pleadingly „I left my phone at Aurora last night, i just got here to get it.“ Phil returned at that point, and i mouthed to him 'Jessy's' name, indicating who i was talking to. Her voice boomed again, and i moved my phone a bit from my ear, wich made Phil laugh. „Ofcourse you did! Its no wonder after all the whiskey you had! Dan is still sleeping like a log! You two really had it last night!“ „Aww, Dont be cross, Jessy.“ I started pleadingly again „I promise next time we wont over do it.“ Phil was grining at me now, and i stuck my toung at him, trying to calm Jessy down. „C'mon, you cant tell me you didnt have some fun yesterday.“ I started „I have some pictures on my phone as a proof of it.“ Phil threw his thumb up, showing me i said a good thing, and i grined at him. „Alright, i admit last night wasnt all that bad.“ Jessy started, sounding calmer now „But you're still not off the hook completly.“ „Thanks, Jessy“ i started, grining as a sign of victory to Phil. „You can scold me some more at lunch, if the deal for it still stands.“  „Ofcourse!“ Jessy cined cheerfuly from the other side „Dan will be a sleep for God knows how long, and im already bored here.“ I quickly moved my phone from the ear checking the time. „Its 12.20 now, when do you want us to meet?“. „I'll meet you around 14 at the Aurora. I doubt Phil will mind you hanging there with him till then.“ She replied, teasing me. „Somehow i think you're right.“ I said, looking at Phil with a devilysh smile. „Cya later, Jessy.“ I sadi, lovering my phone. Phil looked at me,a bit confused „Wat was that about?“ „Oh, just Jessy being Jessy.“ I told him, grining. „Fine, fine, be all mysterious.“ He teased me. „Awww, c'mon, you wouldnt find me so interesting if i was an open book.“ I told him, smiling sheepeshly. He looked at me, with that intensifing look again, making me feel heat spreading through my body „You're not wrong about that.“ Crap, what are you doing again, Maya, i scolded myself. Phil was definatly into me, and i was toying with him like this. It really wasnt my intention, i didnt want him to get the wrong impression about anything. But it felt so easy for me, talking to Phil, compared to Jake. Why does all have to be so tough and complicated with him? It feels like walking on egg shells every time im with him: dont do this, dont say that. Shit, it shouldnt be that way, should it? Was i really that much into Jake? Blah, i dont know anything anymore. I wish he would be more open with me, it would make things so much easier. I was lost in my toughts when Phil finaly snaped me back to reality „Maya? You allright?“ I looked at him, shaking my head,  to clear it from all the 'Jake' toughts. „Yeah, sorry.“ I started „Guess the coffee didnt kick in properly yet.“ Phil looked at me, and i could see he didnt really belive what i told him, but decided not to take the matter any further „If you say so.“ Was all he said. I smiled shyly at him. „Do you mind if i just hang here for an hour or so, before metting with Jessy? I dont feel up to driving back to motel, and the coffee isnt bad here either.“ I tried, smiling, waving my empty cup at him. Phil looked at me, rising one of his eyebrows, and smiled devilishly „How could i say no to a beautifull woman?“ He took my cup, winked at me vanishing through the storage doors. I could feel my cheeks flushing again, and my heart beating faster. Shit, shit, shit..

When Phil came back with another full cup of coffee i asked if its ok if I sit at one of the booths, to wich he said  fine, since he did have some work to be done. I took my stuff and coffee setteling at the booth. I had a bit over an hour before metting with Jessy, i hoped some inspiration for work might come to me. I took my stuff out of the backpack, took my sneakers off, sitting with my feet up on the booths perch. I liked drawing like that. Leaning my drawing pad on my knees i tried to focus on my work, but my toughts just kept wondering off.  I tought about Phil, sneaking glances towards the bar. He was good looking, always nice to me, even tho everyone warned me that he was a 'no good' considering women. He never showed any sign of it towards me. He was easygoing, i enjoyed his company, we definatly clicked. Then there is Jake. I was definatly drawn to him, cant deny that. When im near him, it feels like when a moth is drawn towards fire. Cant fight it, its driving me crazy. But nothing with him is easy. Its like taking one step forward, then not one, or even two, but ten steps back. Its so frustrating. And with all that had happened, i feel like all the progres we had was completly gone. My head was still too woozy for thinking of stuff like this. I setteled my drawing stuff down, taking my coffee, leaning back in the booth. Maybe Jessy would have some advice fore me. Two heads are smarter then one, or so they say. But i should definatly talk to Phil, at least try to explain things to him. I dont want him thinking im giving him some false hope here. As if he could sense my toughts, he turned around, took his coffee and walked towards me. „Mind if i join you?“ he asked, and i smiled „Ofcourse i dont. I guess my inspiration is still sleeping, so no work to be done at the moment.“ He grined „Thats good for me. I can have the pleasure of your company for some more then.“ I chuckled at that, siping some more of the coffee. But i tought again about talking with him about everything.  My face must have gotten some serious expression, 'couse Phil looked at me a bit serious, before asking „Whats bothering you, Maya? I have a feeling you want to talk to me about something.“ I looked at him, those deep eyes of his gazing intensly at me, trying to dig up my toughts. „I do.“ I admitted after a moment „But to be hones, i dont know how to start .“ „Well, just do your best.“ He said, and i started to get the feeling of a knot at my stomach again. „Allright.“ I said, but the words didnt come easy after that. „I like you, Phill.“ I said finaly after a moment of silence. He chuckled „Ok, thats a good start.“ „Ah, but that was the easy part.“ I started „Now comes the tricky one.“ I could notice him tensing a bit, like he knew where this might lead to. „Ok, go on then.“ He said. „I enjoy your company, talking to you, its so easygoing. I feel we clicked, that theres some 'spark' between us, and i know you noticed the same.“  „You're right about that.“ He replied. „But..“ i started, and Phil interupted me, sighing „Ahh, there it is, the famous 'but' part.“ „Please, Phil, just let me say what i have, then you can hate me.“ He looked at me, his face getting a soft touch „I couldnt hate you, Maya.“ „Dont say it untill im not done talking.“ I said, a bit sadness creeping to my voice. „Alright. Please, continue.“ „Ok. As i started earlier,i like you, but i dont want to get your hopes up.“ I settled my coffe on the table, my hands fidgeting with the cup. Why was this so hard? „Shit, Phil, im a complete mess at the moment.“ I started „I myself dont know what i want, and its tearing me up inside. There is someone, and i dont know where I stand with him. And i dont want to start something new, if im not a 100% sure that its the right thing, that its something i really want. With no loose ends catching up on me.“ I looked up at Phil, him still not taking his eyes off me. „Am i making any sense to you here?“ i asked, lovering my head. I really didnt want to have this conversation, but that was me being honest. All of a sudden, i could feel Phil's hand covering mine, and i looked back up at him. He still had that softness written all over his face. „I appriciate your honesty, Maya.“ He started „Now let me be honest also.“ „Ofcourse“ i said „I expect nothing less.“ „Good.“ He looked at me more serious now. „You know i like you, you said it yourself. I dont know why, but i felt drawn to you the moment i saw you. Theres something in you that makes a man bedazled by you, i cant explain it differently.“ He paused for a moment before continuing. „And i get it, you dont want to get into something half hearted. And i applaud you for that. Because, if anything was to happen between us, i wouldnt want it that way either.“ He looked at me now, his gaze intensifing again, and i started to feel that heat again. „If it was to happen“ he continued „I would prefere if you wer in it with every inch of your body and soul.“ I was mesmerized by his words. He was so open with me, the words came so easy to him. Why cant it be like this with Jake. „Allrighty, that was pretty honest there.“ I said finaly, making an aqward smile. „You wanted me to be honest.“ He said, adding „And just so you know, im not going to make it easy for you.“ He looked at me now, with that devilish spark in his eyes again. I looked at him puzzled „What do you mean by it?“ He grined at me „Its like this: i will continue to act like i did so far, and you can do the same, cause, lets face it, we both like it.“ His grin widened, and i smiled back at him. „Good, you get me. But, until i get a confirmation from you about freely taking it a step further, i will do whatever i can to maybe, just maybe, help you feel a bit less messy and steer thigs in my favore.“ „And what if it wont end as you hope it would? Can you be ok with just being my friend?“ i asked him. He looked at me for a moment, before answering. „Honestly“ he started“i cant say i wouldnt be dissapointed, a little hearth broken probably, but i would respect your choice. And yes, Maya, if that would be so, i would gladly be just your friend.“ “Thanks, Phil, i appriciate all you said.“ I told him „I was kinda affraid of having this conversation with you.“ „You, affraid? I cant belive that“ he said, teasingly „Belive me, i was scared as hell.“ I said, adding to it „But im glad we had it. I didnt want it to become aqward between us at some point.“ „Not gonna happen.“ He said, winking at me. I smiled „Shit, you know, even thou i had enough yesterday, i could actualy use a drink right now.“ Phil lughed so hard „Awww, you really did get scared. We are in a bar afterall, you just say the words and ill bring you that drink.“ He said, looking at me with one raised eyebrow. „Only if you join me“ i said, grining at him „ And if you dont tell Jessy about it.“ He got up from the booth, smiling and winking before he left for the bar „Deal!“

[dellinah]

LONG ASS RANT ABOUT THYLACINES

I'm still not coping well so i made some shitty memes about my constant hyperfixation

Well I have been fascinated with these animals since I was a literal 8 year old bc of a book my mom gave me about animals (they're all drawn as opposed to pictures too it's pretty cool i used to trace over them all the time)

They're cool marsupials that went extint in 1936

I am a dumbass with one braincell so for some reason it didn't sink in that when the text said 'disappeared 70 years ago' it meant DISAPEARED FOR REAL. I also was too dumb to realize it was under the 'extinct' chapter

Anyway. These animals are fascinating to me and I have been obsessed with everything related to them ever since. I love how close they look to dogs and wolves despite not being related bc evolution works that well, i love their cute little faces, I love how they managed to survive way longer than they were meant to (more on that bellow), how they move, their lower ankles that look like someone fucked up a dog drawing, everything about it

And I absolutely HATE what they have become a symbol of

I would like to think human activity alone isnt enough to actually drive animals to extinction. That, while it helps, it merely speeds up the pace of an inevitable fate. But that's not true. There have been countless animals that died out bc of humans, and that would have been just fine without us around - be it by hunting, destroying habitats, introducing new species or bringing disease

Thylacines were hunted with no mercy bc they were thought to kill farm animals. People offered money for each one that was shot. Animals that humans introduced to their habitat infected them with disease and made food less avaiable. And just a few decades later, they were gone, forever

And if that wasn't bad enough, the last one we have record of died bc of NEGLET. In a zoo, he was left out in the cold night and didn't make it. They probably threw the body away with no care, thinking they could just get another one to use as exibition, and then realized too late it was the last

ON TOP OF THAT, rules to protect them were set in place about 50 days before the last one died. 50 DAYS!! Talk about too little too late. Maybe if they had done it earlier, things would have been different, but no. They didn't care until they realized hey we havent seen one in forever, fuck

ON TOP OF ON TOP OF THAT, the picture that was used to get farmers to kill them of a thylacine with a chicken in its mouth was most likely faked using a mounted one. It was fucking propaganda?? To??? Kill animals?? Man, what the FUCK. Maybe kill the ones around your property (still wrong but fine) but why lie to people to make them go out of their way to kill animals in the wild??

Everything about thylacines' extintion just highlights the worst parts of the human nature. How careless we are to everything but ourselves. How if it doesn't make us money, we don't care. How we care too little too late. How we can destroy something so easily. And how we don't care about lying about something to get what we want, no matter how bad the consequences might be to someone else

I honestly think the fascination people have with finding these animals in recent years is due to guilt, at least some of it. Yes it's a cool animal, but most important of all it makes us feel bad. So finding a new one maybe would make it ok. We can still save it. We're not that bad.

But that ever happening is unlikely

Thylacines lived short lives (up to 6 years in the wild, 9 in zoos) so to have them survive would require large populations constantly breeding. So to think we wouldnt have found a bone, a dead body, or run over one in over 70 years (also everyone has a phone now, why cant there ever be GOOD pictures taken of these sightings?) just seems like the kind of thing that can't happen

Not only that, but before human intervention they already suffered from low genetic diversity due to its population getting smaller over centuries due to disease and few individuals. It's sad to think that they were always doomed to fail, but it's likely the path they were going towards

So it just makes it way less likely that they would have survived in the wild. They were already failing to reproduce and survive with the individuals they had - imagine after we kill 99% of them. Even if some did make it past the year we recorded, it probs died out shortly after

BUT they could still be alive today, or at least gotten a few more decades. Some people think they did. And maybe we could have helped them if they made it to today with the technology we have

But we'll never know

There's a bunch of footage (with some newly discovered one) of the last one, and while that is cool, it just makes me sad :( to see it pacing around its small cage, with nothing to do, no other one to keep it company (they were often depicted in pairs, idk if they were social animals but it seems like it), not knowing it would never again have another one like it. There's also footage of someone rattling its cage?? Probs to get it worked up to make it walk around or react or something. DONT DO THAT

It's just a sad footage overall, and becomes painful to watch once you know everything else. A sad pacing stressed animal, that would die alone in the cold and go down in history as the last one ever. All while being oblivious to everything we have done to its kind, bc it was just a scared animal

Some people think they survived into the 90's, a lot of people claim to have seen one since 1936 (with no proof) and february 2021 one expert said they had proof they saw one and that it was a baby. It has been debunked by another expert, i have yet to see the pics, but until we have DEFINITE proof, i'll keep on believing they're gone

But it's nice to hope every once in a while. Every sighting makes me a bit happy. This is a big world, with so much of it unexplored, and animals though extinct have showed up again or even been cloned recently. So who knows!

It has been pretty shitty to live through a major historical event that is bad. For a moment I hoped I'd witness one that was actually a positive one

And honestly, if they are still out there, maybe a small population that learned to hide very well, I hope they keep hidden. I'd love to see them, but maybe they're better on their own

We've seen what happens when they're not