#having a digital tablet makes a hell of a difference

[wigglebox]

Wings of Love [x]

[kinokoshoujoart]

oops all rock (springtime edition)

i’ll be able to draw digitally again soon! ;w; in the meantime i’ve been scribbling a lot on paper…

could not wait for Soon, so i resorted to coloring it using the markup tool in default iphone photos app (don’t do that ever again)

[arcadian-vampire]

Nervous giggles

Even more nervous giggles

There are so many professional paintings here, so many technically advanced, highly impressive works, and I'm just like [slaps some crayons down] y- yeehaw,,

I'm keeping the Escape Motions site Exciting. keeping it Interesting and Ridiculously Colorful

[neyliaart]

Cause why not make a tumblr post to see who relates

I just sent a fairly long audio and at the end of it i went: "wait... Im stressed!" because through the whole audio of me bickering about why my day is awful i did not notice that I was stressed.

I am exhausted and I am STRESSED

and sometimes which is very often actually I dont know how im feeling or why im feeling wrong. I know something is wrong. I know my feeling wrong. But especially when im exhausted its hard to tell if im feeling "sad" wrong or "stressed" wrong or "hungry" wrong or any other kind of wrong because emotions are so hard.

How can I not notice I am stressed about the uncertainty this week will provide?? How could I go the entirety of yesterday and the most of today without realizing that???

[thelunarsystemwrites]

Oops-

I accidentally became moots with a lot of cool undertale/UTMV artists-

*inhale*

@nobodys-reblogs Like, you were my first idol on here that I befriended 🥺 AND NOT BECAUSE YOU WERE MY IDOL- you legit just seemed cool, and I am very VERY grateful each time I see '#friend tag' with you!! I also love your style, it gives a sense of comfort because of the shades you normally use!! (<- psstt I also like your doors content!)

@inka-boi I love the way you draw chubby and plus sized people, literally helped with my own drawings of different body types! You're also super nice. And well, my mum—I love the purple yarn family, I live for the purple yarn ship, you're super sweet!

@zombiestar1934 Uhm, yeah—Yoink. Your art is very yoinkable, VERY HUGGABLE!! Looks like it was drawn in a library, where you had the peace of only hearing your drawing tablet make 'lil clicks! I love the hearts you add to blush, and the smiles you give them! Yet you're just as capable of making angst, and I love Angst :3

@absurdumsid I want to hug all, and I mean ALL your drawings. ESPECIALLY horrorpills, I love the clean look they all have, I love looking at your art, and I just- aghghgh your so cool!!

@italic-doing-random-shit man you're just very awesome, idk how the hell I manged being moots w/ you but I'm vibing with it, your art is like, yum. It gives me, hm... Oh! Okay it gives me animatic vibes, like you'd be a good animator! /pos!

@inkcat1987 AWE. JUST AWE—I love how sweet your style is, and I'm especially liking the middle school AU!! Once again, soft as angel wings!

@axinfinity there's just- there's something so HOLDABLE about your art! I just wanna pick it up and protect it!

@ant1quarian ah yes, a fellow UTMV enjoyer who collects a very specific sans, that being Dust in your case! /vpos. Your style, it's like moss. It has a natural feel, it looks like it'd smell like rain, like feathers and it's so... like this song, The Moss is how I feel when I look at your pfp!

@dzasterdumpterfire Stars. Your art looks like stars, I'm fairly sure the lighting comes from the stars. I dunno it's just kinda mystifying to look at!

@endless-emptyness Your art >>>> Very pleasant to look at. I really enjoy the facial expressions you do!!

@solusminds your art feels like it was crafted in the cozy darkness, illuminated only by a single lantern, while winter blazes outside. It's so nice and warm feeling!

@kiyo-void A lovely painting! All your works feel like they were painted, painted and set in a cool breeze to dry, especially your digital art, and I am LIVING for it! Plussssss Runetale is super cool!

@denieatsart HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE that's how I feel looking at what you make!! I love the kinda like, layered look your art gives!!

@largefound can't say a bad thing about ya, you're cool, your art gives cool feelings, cool vibes everywhere!

Annd... it's late, I can't think of anyone else BUT IF I DO I will ADD YOU to the list!!

UPDATED:

@rushin-safire. Yeah, your art? Feels like it was drawn with a cat in your lap while you've just come home from the Cafe, still sipping on your coffee. :3

@nashdoesstuff for the LIFE OF ME I can't figure out how the hell to search your art, hpw am I screwing it up?? But anyways it probably tastes like gummy bears. /pos.

@nightmarish-qeuwusha Your art tastes like cotton candy! I think that your art was woven from candy floss and glittered with stardust! ^^

@analexthatexists Containment! I feel like your art gives off SCP vibes, I feel like I'm some sort of entity when I look at it, and that, is, awesome!

@determinedfanartist okay but like, your art is "I drew this specifically bc I love my friends" and I cannot be convinced otherwise. /pos

@mrfellsans Ah, cartoony. Specifically with that dapper charm to it! I'm talking bendy and the ink machine, I'm talking swing, I'm talking pleasant to look at as you have a modern spin on it!

@the-second-reason your art is that chill older kid, the one that helps ou their younger peers figure out stuff. They're the super relaxed big sibling, your art has a mellow style, gives chill big sibling vibes. :]

@dustsansm1 I mean this in the best way possible, your art feels friendly but has anxiety. And that's okay! Your art gives me like, it wants to be friends w/ someone but too shy to do so. It has a sorta 'I'm trying my best' style, when it's already really good!

@spookuzm cover artist! I feel like you'd do well drawing the characters that you put on the cover of stuff, your art vibes me those vibes! Like it's the peak inside a new world! ^^ Hey side note this changed to comfort artist

@mellybabbles Reflections, your art makes me reflect on myself. What was behind it? Every line you etch into it makes me think, ponder, as if it were drawn from a mirror.

@wickjump ICON. Your art is SUCH an icon, you're RADIATING icon vibes. The colours you use seem to naturally give off a hue to it, giving it that pop! It's beautiful and clean and iconic! ✨️

@hialeisanimation I mean this in the most light hearted way possible—It's just happy. Like your art is the definition of :3 and I am VIBING w/ it, very lovely to look at!

@joonebugg your art has PERSONALITY, like they don't take shit from anyone. Like looking at it, feels like they'd be the decals for a 1970s diner and they're like the characters, they work too hard to take orders from ungrateful customers. THAT'S what your style looks like to me.

@milkybnnuy so your style (especially when you draw Fell!NM) is so dark and radiates that dark energy and pretty pretty please I need more angst- /pos (edit: dear cod I got that angst)

@bluu3berry - you really utilize shades of colour really well, I think you've done a wonderful job with Bluu!! /Gen! I think your style really reminds me of an older cartoon with their softer colours, like Charlie brown! And, I love Charlie brown!

@hiro-doodlez - Your art uses ALL of your canvas to your advantage! Like rarely have I ever seen you draw something and leave a blank space, which also helps you create a ton of interesting shading! I like how you draw over colours w/ other colours, so your base colours helps the top layer—Does that make sense? ^^ like, your style is very out there! Very you, very recognizable!

@dustbvnnyy Y2K INVADER ZIM like it's awesome, your artstyle gives me y2k alt vibes!! I love the soft saturated (is that a thing? ^^') colours that go into your pieces!!

@murder-clown-around-town fun!! I saw your pinned post and from what you drew IT LOOKS SO FUN!! Like a balloon animal!! I like how the lines overlap and create a structure!! :D

@miracle-negative soft and heavenly! Your art, even using a darker pallet is soft and smooth!!

@yellow-computer-mouse it's quite relaxed! I like the shading you did on that smoking Dust picture! ^^

@eco-systeme royal! You have a very royal, a very fancy looking style to me!! Like, someone paid you a good amount to draw it! I hope you forever remain creative, love your art!

@wishtale-blogs spring vibes!! Absolutely beautiful spring, butterflies, meadows and more!! I LOVE MONARCH I've literally never seen orange and pastels work well like yours does!!!

@swiftmitsu YOOO MY FIRST FRIEND MADE ON DISCORD!!! I'd like to say I'm a huge fan of your artstyle! It's a good mix between adorable, but can be taken seriously if the tone demands it! This is a hard skill to acquire, because a lot of adorable art can be hard to feel the wanted emotions conveyed — But you found just the right balance! I always look forward to you posting! ^^

@cocopebblez Detailed and stylish! I look at your art and go WOAH, I look at your sona and they're STUNNING, I look at you and I see cameras flashing as paparazzi tries to get your photo as you strut down the red carpet. So fame worthy is how I perceive your art!! And fame in the future I see!

@underfaithangelz welcome to the wall! I see your art has a very lantern vibe! Using this as my reference! I love how you can use low lighting and still make everything perfectly visual! It gives it a warm glow! I think your style is like fire, with all the intricate brush marks like flames! Beautiful and gorgeous just as your voice!

Also, we may not be moots—But honourary mention to @somegrumpynerd you're my comfort artist, I go searching for Dadmare if I'm down and I find your art—I love how it just looks like the embodiment of Marshmallows. I love how you draw each and every scene you've made, the emotions you convey even if it's supposed to just be a silly post! Just ahhhhhh I love looking at what you make!!

Have a good day, night, evening, morning, or whatever time it is for you guys!

[iraprince]

also ive been gushing abt this on twitter but not as much on here: it is really difficult to describe how much easier + more comfortable i find it to work on the new device.

i had started to develop a suspicion that a screen tablet would make a huge difference to me, just based on how much more easily i can draw on paper than digitally -- hard to describe exactly, it's not that i feel i CAN'T draw as well digitally (or so much of my work wouldn't be digital lol), but that it always took SO much more time and effort to arrive at a drawing of the same quality as something i could dash off w/o thinking on paper. (this is why so much of my work is drawn in pencil, scanned, + then colored digitally, even tho adding extra steps is hell incarnate for me!!) and it made me wonder, like, i've been assuming i MUST be used to a non-screen tablet bc i've used nothing but those for 10+ years, but was there really a hand-eye-coordination thing at play that contributed to that skill gap...? but it would be really scary to make such an expensive investment on a hunch (even if i could make the initial purchase and then return it, which i straight up couldn't anyway lol.)

anyway. now that i've tried it, even for just a day, i can say very firmly that it feels like i've just learned i've been doing things the hard way for a fucking decade and now i don't have to anymore and it's such a relief and like. this probably sounds melodramatic but it feels like it's completely refreshed how i feel abt making art and everything is more FUN now and like. just. it's making a huge huge difference for me. i'm really excited about what this upgrade means for me and the kind of weight it's going to take off me every day. thank u so so much

[fraugwinska]

Chapter 20 - Conspiracy

Conspirancy (noun) 1. a secret plan by a group to do something unlawful or harmful. 2. the action of plotting

Tags & Warnings: Stalking, Obsessive Behavior, Abusive behavior, Acts of violence

The Vee Tower was always buzzing with electricity. Every power line, every socket, every video feed and neon sign was pulsing, giving life to the hustling and bustling of the citizens of each side of the pentagram, illuminating the city with screens of every kind - signs, phones, tablets and TV's alike. All of it's current pumped into the main line, running like blood through a powerful, all encompassing, overseeing body, leading up to its highest point and heart of the Vee's operational building: The Control Room on floor 66. And within it sat Vox, connected with his network at all times and places. The eyes and ears of the modern age, the miracle of digital technology at his very fingertips.

Normally, he'd be busy managing the evening program, making sure his schedule of news, shows and most importantly advertisements was executed as per his plans and wishes and not how the cunt, Katie Killjoy - who made good on her name sucking every bit of fun out of television off camera - or his incompetent production assistants whose names he never bothered to learn thought it should be run. But when he got the ping of his private spycam, every single one of the hundreds of screens surrounding him showed the same live video feed:

Alastor. The grinning deer demon was exiting the Carmine weapon factory, his image slightly corrupted as usual. And next to him... well, there was a flashy little thing next to him. When the figure stepped further into the range of his camera and the drone refocused the lens, he started his facial and image recognition protocols, but seconds after he wouldn't have needed them anyway. His grin became predatory, the image of the lynx demon girl crystal clear and unforgettable on the screens as well as in his mind. The alias ['Roxxy?'] popped up next to her face, and he hummed displeased, her file and everything else the 'Observer'-program could provide him about her flooding his visual interface, but only taking a second to really go through it. All of it wasn't worth much, his informants, spies and connections useless as they were barely able to find any tangible information on that slut. The only reliable source would've been Angel Dust, but that spidery whore wasn't under his, but Val's contract, and the less Val knew about Vox's still ongoing obsession about Alastor and his plaything, the better. The moths jealousy knew no bounds, and the Radio Demon has always been a sore topic between them.

Vox watched with narrowed eyes as the drone followed them through the heart of the city, and he seethed at his own stupidity to not have the drone equipped with audio feed. Whatever they were talking about must've been something good because not only had Alastor an infuriatingly proud grin in place, but his lackey with tits, not bothered at all at the dozens of eyes that followed her wherever she walked, beamed at him too. Literally. Vox had to switch through different filters to confirm he wasn't fucking hallucinating. That bitch glowed. Brightened in an almost golden aura of energy, pulsating, vibrating with each step she took. Vox snarled and growled, the monitors in front of him screeching as his fury doubled at the sight of that shameless and insolent whore of a nightlight next to the Radio Demon. Ever since the little incident at the Lava Lounge, Vox had tried to find out more about just who she was. And came up short on every corner. No pictures, no records, no acquaintances, no digital footprint whatsoever. Just like him. Since when was she in hell? Fuck if he knew. Where did she meet Alastor? No fucking idea.

There were only three things he knew about her.

One: She was somehow tied to the Radio Demon, although Vox didn't know just in what way exactly, but he had a hunch, and if he was right, then things could get very interesting. Two: She resided at the doomed, stupid hotel that the monarchs daughter threw together in the worthless attempt to redeem sinners (What a joke that shit was!) Three: Despite her nice ass and rack, she was a worthless, talent less, classless bitch, undeserving of being at an overlords side, especially Alastor's.

The pair had stopped, and Alastor's hand on her shoulder made Vox snarl, the pixels on his screen glitching violently. The feud between the TV and the Radio Demon had lasted for more than five decades now - what once was a close friendship of mutual respect became a vicious rivalry after a bitter fallout, and Vox still felt the lingering of disappointment burning in his chest. Yes, Alastor had disappointed him. Years of work, dedication and loyalty from Vox destroyed with a simple 'No.'. From any other? Fair enough, move on. From Alastor, however – unforgivable.

Lost in reminisce, Vox startled when the control room was suddenly dipped in bright, yellow light.

That bitch hung around his neck, hugging him.

And to add insult to injury, Alastor, whose face was now clear and undistorted, returned her touch, with an expression Vox has longed for ever since they parted ways. His claws sank into the main panel, drawing deep ridges that sparked as they dug their way through metal and wires. The lights flickered, sparks flying as his connection to the main network overheated by the raw anger he felt. Screens went black and lights out, the red emergency lamps switched on as he caused a power outage throughout at least the whole building.

Whatever this was, and Vox would sooner throw himself butt-naked in front of the blade of an exorcist before he labeled it something like adoration, or worse - love -, he needed it to stop. He had tolerated this little hotel project, knowing Alastor used it as a sheer side-gig to sate his never-ending hunger for entertainment, it was something Vox could live with. But another demon, shifting Alastor's focus away from him, Vox? Making him look this soft, this weak? Fuck no. Something must be done, something drastic.

His head rang, showing an incoming call from Velvette, and the sound broke his spiraling thoughts. With an annoyed sigh he picked it up.

"What the hell, Vox?! I hope for your sake you did electrocute yourself, because if not I'm about to kill you."

"OH MY STARS!"

Disregarding any and every customer Rosie had been animatedly talking to, as soon as you and Alastor came through the heavy double doors, golden bell chiming at your entrance, her tall figure stormed through the isles of the store, arms outstretched, before the tall demoness caught and engulfed you in a warm and happy embrace.

"Do my eyes deceive me? My favorite dove, oh how I've missed you! Look how you're glowin'!" she cried out, twirling you around as she checked you over like an eager, yet extremely fashionable mom before pulling you in a bone-crushing embrace. Her enthusiasm made your tail fluff up and you sighed happily, wrapping your arms around her and hugging her back. "It's so good to see you again."

When she let go of you, she eyed Alastor as he stepped up next to you, giving him a rather pointed look and tilt of her head. "And it's wonderful to see you too... Finally."

"No need for your reproaches, dearest, our kitten is here at last, and very eager to see you." Alastor's smile seemed less menacing for a moment, a subtle sign of playfulness when he looked down at you. You couldn't keep yourself from giving him a subtle smile, ears lifted and alert to the melodious sound of Rosie's laughter as she clapped her hands, turning to the customers that had watched the ordeal.

"Ladies, gentlemen, and those in between - feel free to roam around, my staff is available should you need help, but I will be taking my leave. Don't give me that look, Gladys, you don't need me telling you that you don't need another fur coat."

She dismissed the small group, some of them (especially the cannibal lady she had called Gladys) shooting you dirty looks and gossiping behind their backs, before Rosie turned back to you and Alastor, her hands resting on her hips and a big smile on her face. "Now, you two, come along."

Rosie led the two of you behind a dark, velvet curtain and into a smaller room, with a large, red sofa and a matching tea table, a few cabinets, a shelf of books and a fireplace with a mantle. It was cozy, and the scent of roses and asphodel was so strong it was almost dizzying. Alastor's shadow popped up on the floor and Rosie's eyes darted to it with an amused chuckle as Ozul helped you into a chair.

"I see the old boy is wrapped around our darling girl's little finger."

"He seems to be. And he is not the only one - We have been quite busy, as I assume you have as well. How have you been?", Alastor said as he took a seat next to you, shooting a condescending look at his shadow who lingered under your feet, fizzing happily.

"Oh, you know my nick of town - it's always the little known song and dance. Business is booming, especially since your little hotel sent out the countless invitations to a certain Blue Moon Ball to everything that has a name in hell." She shot you a knowing wink. "Of course you received my acceptance letter?"

"We did, thank you Miss Rosie. We are honored to have you attending.", you said, bowing your head a little. Rosie gave an affectionate chuckle. "Oh, no need for all the courtesy, dear, we're friends, aren't we?"

You blushed a little. While you considered Rosie a confidant, a trusted adviser... hearing her calling you a friend stunned you more than you thought.

"Yes... we are, Miss Rosie."

She handed you a cup of steaming, magenta colored tea that smelled of hollyhock and lemon, and you thanked her, your lips twitching and eyes honest and heartwarmingly happy.

"No problem at all my darling dove, it feels like I've waited a lifetime and a half for your visit and I know how much you love to indulge in a good cup of tea. And speaking of problems..."

She shot Alastor a meaningful glance, and you could hear his eyes practically rolling as she made a shooing gesture with her hands. "You can make yourself scarce for a while, I need to catch up with her."

It took a lot of strength not to laugh at Alastor's face. His brows furrowed, his smile tensed so much his gums showed and his eyes darted to the heavy curtain, a muffled, obnoxious laugh erupting on the other side.

"Oh don't mind me, dearest, I'm sure there is plenty you two can converse with me staying..."

"Out with you. You can keep yourself entertained with Gladys, she's bothering me almost daily to speak to you." Rosie emphasized her words with a glare, and even though she was a woman, no, a demon of such beauty and grace, it was obvious that Rosie had the same air of intimidation Alastor had, if she wanted to. Must've come with the title of overlord, you guessed.

You could practically feel the static humming around him, and with a deep sigh, he stood up, adjusting his overcoat and bow tie.

"Very well. But don't expect me to return to the hotel without her, dearest."

Rosie rolled her eyes and waved him off, and as the curtain fell back into place and a high pitched hum of female voices arose, all calling for the poor radio demon, she sat down across from you, leaning forward with a smile that looked more than pleased. "Now then, do tell, what you've been up to since we last parted, my darling?"

The words were spoken in a conspiratorial manner, a wicked, excited grin on her lips. It made you a bit nervous, not sure how much Rosie knew about you and Alastor, and if you should be careful with what you say. Your tail twitched and whipped, and you took a sip of the tea to calm your nerves.

"I've... had a lot going on. Work is taking up most of my time, but I've been learning so much. From Alastor, and the rest of the staff."

Rosie listened intently, nodding her head as she sipped her tea, but her black eyes felt like they roamed your face for any little indications of more. You were aware that you were blushing, the memories of the past month, of the things you experienced with him, of what you learned... it all came flooding back, making your heart race. Rosie seemed to notice, and chuckled quietly.

"You have grown, dear. Even more than I've expected - and that's a good thing. I won't pry, but I have a certain feeling about the two of you, especially after Alastor's last visit, and if you want to talk..." She gave a subtle nudge, her head tilted and her eyes soft now.

You gulped down your tea, but her gaze was kind and understanding, making your shoulders relax as she patted you hand. Rosie was your friend, but much longer before, she was Alastor's. You knew he trusted her, for decades it had been this way, even so much so that she knew almost everything about your deal and the conditions around it. If there was anyone in hell you could really, truly lay it all out - Rosie would be the one. So you sat down your cup, and started to talk.

"Angel Cakes~", Valentino coos, dangerously alluring and his voice dripping with poisonous sweetness. The spider freezes, his wide mismatched eyes staring back at him from his vanity mirror and he can see the fear in them. He knew this tone just too well. Valentino hummed, walking closer to him, and in the reflection he could see that he wasn't alone. Vox was sneaking up on him too, a bit further back, lurking in the shadows like a shark in deep water. The fuck was he doing here?

"How about a little break, hm, pastelito? I want to have a little chat with you."

Angel, tried to stop his hand from trembling as he sat down the brush loaded with rose-colored blush he was holding. His eyes darted once more to the TV demon at the back of his dressing room, arms crossed and legs stiff - but his eyes were transfixed on him. It sent a shiver down his spine, but he inhaled quietly, hardening himself and put on the mask Angel knew was safest with Valentino.

"Of course, Mista' Valentino, I always have time for you~" He hated this honey-dripping, high voice, but he smiled nonetheless, turning on his chair with a flourish of his hands and looking into the mans eyes with his head tilted to the side. The bug overlord let out an appreciative chuckle, a grin splitting his face as he took another drag from the awful blunt that sat at the end of his cigarette holder, exhaling the sickly sweet pinkish smoke that made Angel always dizzy, hazy and willing.

"Hmmm. You know," the moth only had to take a few strides with his long legs before one set of his arms came to rest his hands on his shoulders, while his other claws raked playfully through his chest fluff and Angel could've vomited right there, feeling the eyes of both overlords on him, one pair lustfully and threatening, the other full of hatred and scorn. "...a little birdie told me you agreed to an outside gig? Showing off my money-making body at some wacky, degraded ball at the little princesa's hotel you ran off to... for free. You wouldn't be this stupid, right, baby?"

Angel's brain reeled, trying to quickly find the prepared deflection. He had known Val would find out eventually, would confront him - he would've been a fool to think otherwise. Despite what others thought, Angel wasn't stupid... anymore. But he was still scared, and the fact that Val brought Vox to address this was something he would've never anticipated. Which made him skittish, nervous, and his facade so much weaker.

"V-Val, I... it's nothing, it's just a short, little dance..."

One moment, he was sitting on the stool, staring up in those cruel, burning eyes of the insect-demon who ruled and terrorized his life, the next second, he was knocked over on the ground, cheek burning and eyes watering. He touched the stinging skin on the left side of his face and winced at the harsh pull on his hair and neck that snapped him up and back, forced to look into Val's maniacally smiling face. "And since when do you get to decide what jobs you do? I FUCKING OWN YOU, you won't even show your left ass cheek on a stage without me getting fucking paid for every little inch. But if you need a reminder..."

A dangerous sound was his only warning before Val grabbed his throat, and he fought for his breath while his pimp slammed him up on the nearest wall, crying out as his bare back hit the hard concrete with painful force. Val kept grinning, red drool starting to leak from his mouth, and he tightened his grip, but a sound made him halt.

Vox cleared his throat, looking away from the scene before him with a stoic face. "Val, we have to meet Velvette in ten. Get to the point."

Even though Angel hated Vox, hated how indifferent he was to what happened right in front of his stupid fucking flat face, hated his ignorance and arrogance... he was grateful that he decided to intervene, although he knew it wasn't to spare him more pain. Air flooded his lungs as Valentino let his neck go and dropped him to his feet, the moth growling deeply, obviously dissatisfied.

"If you shake your bony ass on that bitches stage, I will get money for it. Luckily for you, babycakes, Vox told me you had a little friend, fresh meat with a nice ass and some stage talent, and I'm gracious enough for a little trade."

His heart sank to his gut. His arms lifted, and even though his chest rose and fell from his still labored breathing, he willed himself to hold it together, his wide eyes fixated on Vox's still unmoving face. Was that asshole still that pissed about that night, willing to go as far as to go to Val about her? "Are... are you serious? She can't... Rocky isn't that kind of performer. She's..."

Val didn't let him finish, instead he grabbed his face, fingers digging into Angels cheeks and he winced when he felt small drops of blood running down his jawline. "I don't care. Either you'll get her down here for a little negotiation, or you won't ever recognize your butthole after I have you work every goddamn actor twice. And you sure as hell won't be able to shimmy it for the princessa perra a month from now either."

Angel's eyes teared up, not because of the sharp pain caused by Val's hand, but by the thought of Rocky taking his place in it. Not another one. Not her. Never her.

He knew what Valentino wanted him to say, what he was supposed to. Yes, Valentino. Of course, Valentino. Amen Valentino. This was how it worked, hell, this business, his contract. Throw others under the bus to save your own skin. Don't trust, don't attach, survive. Yet he felt a burning resistance that closed his mouth shut, even when his pimp took another blow against his face and knocked him back to his knees with the bitter taste of blood in his mouth.

"Fix yourself up, your shoot starts in five. And until your little bitch friend knocks on my door, you'll work double shifts, carino."

Valentino turned around, joining Vox who was typing something into his phone, leaving a shattered and shaking Angel on the ground. The TV demon looked up when his partner grabbed his shoulder and pulled him to the door, a small smile on his lips as he shot the beaten spider struggling to sit up again a cruel, satisfied look. "I hope you are right and that slut is worth the hassle... He'll look like a fucking trainwreck for his next shoots. Las cosas que tengo que aguantar, fuck."

Angel blinked, dumbstruck, as the pair of overlords left him, door slammed shut, and he slid back against the wall, resting against the dirty floor and mind blank.

Rosie had listened without interruptions to everything you told her, gasping and ooh-ing and growling at all the right pinpoints, but never interrupting. Of course you've left out delicate details, but you went as far as to tell Rosie that things got physical with Alastor, and her expression at that revelation had been both shocked as well as smug, the latter of which confused you profoundly.

Now that you've ended, teacup empty and tail stiff and ears lifted, you stared up at her, fidgeting in the heavy silence you couldn't really interpret. She held her own cup in her hands, claws scraping over the rim and lost in thoughts, eyes trained at the tabletop. Her brows were raised and her lips turned upwards a fraction, a mix between amused and surprised. You wondered what went on behind her pitch black eyes and parted lips.

"Well, isn't that a turn of events." She said, setting the delicate china down and clapped her hands together, folding her long, white fingers into one another. "So just to be sure, dove, it sounds an awful lot like your devotion isn't based solely on your soul contract with our dear deer anymore... Am I right?"

Your face burned, and you threw a look over your shoulder, making sure the curtain was still closed.

"I... I can't speak for Alastor, or what he might think about this situation." you whispered back as you set your teacup down, careful that your volume couldn't be picked up, your face heating up. "I don't even know what you would call this 'situation' exactly. But... yes."

Rosie chuckled knowingly, a delighted smile on her face, as if she won a bet. "I would've loved to see his face when you told him."

"Told him?" you echoed, a confused look on your face. Rosie's expression fell, but she still grinned at your bewilderment, the soft sound of a laugh rumbling from her throat. "Well, you did tell him, didn't you? Surely he knows about..."

But after looking at your face, fallen and almost scared, she just said "Oh." and reached for you over the coffee table.

"I can't," you explained, slumping your shoulders, eyes cast down in shame. Rosie seemed puzzled at that, so you continued to explain. "...I have no idea how, Miss Rosie. I'm not even sure that Alastor really... I'm not nothing to him, I know that, but..."

... I'm not ready to risk what I have until I can be sure I won't lose it, you ended the sentence in your head. However you felt for Alastor, you were honest when you said that you didn't know what to call it: Was it just infatuation? Was it a fleeting crush, or was it more, was it something serious? And it was obvious that he felt something for you too, whatever it was, but there were still too many uncertainties, to many fears and doubts that still needed further exploration, still needed to be unveiled and figured out. You thoughts went back to your conversation with the goetian prince and what Alastor said just before you went to see Stolas.

“It's not like the powerful would make concessions and give up the advantages their status grants them.”

And that was the real crux, wasn't it? Whatever feelings were involved - there was the ultimate, undeniable power dynamic that came with selling your soul, the very thing Angel was worried about, even though he didn't know the full extent on your end. Master and Servant, just like Pimp and Whore.

“You play stupid games because you think he loves 'ya, and if he's... not in it like you are the prize 'ya get is more than you can chew...”

Was Alastor 'in it' as much as you were? Was he even capable of it? Fondness was one thing, a good thing, a beautiful thing that was able to make your heart flutter. But even though you couldn't label what you felt for him, 'fondness' wouldn't even begin to cut it. What would prevent you from sharing the same fate that had Angel put in the position he found himself in? And what did Stolas say?

"There came a time where the knowledge of the wrongness of it all became too much. I felt like I held him a prisoner. He felt used and toyed with."

While he hadn't made a soul contract, his relationship had been almost destroyed by the imbalance of power, only to be saved by freeing his imp partner from his bounds to him. But would Alastor free you one day from your contract? Or better yet: Would you want him to?

Rosie gave an understanding click of her tongue, patting your hand and gently bringing you out of your head to lift your eyes and look at her, where you saw a small, apologizing smile. "I was assuming, dove, I'm sorry. I didn't want to prod you and make you all gloomy and serious. But I've never seen or heard Alastor behave that way with anyone, less a soul he owned, and when you both came in here and looked like... well, I mean - that's why I thought..." She glanced at the curtain with an exasperated look and sighed. "Do me a favor, dove - be patient for a little longer. This dunderhead has the sharpest mind in hell regarding deals and power, but when it comes to... other things he can be a complete numskull. Useless I dare say."

Your lips curled into a smile, finally, and Rosie, after she patted it one more time, let go of your hand and rolled her shoulders, craning her beautiful, slender neck.

"Enough of talking about this old, foolish nincompoop now - when there is a much more interesting topic I want to stick my nose into."

She stood up and rounded the table, gesturing you to follow her. You did, startled by the sudden change of pace and hurried after her as she crossed the room. "I'm not sure what you mean, Miss Rosie."

"Your powers, my dearest. When Alastor first told me about them I was already intruiged, but with everything you've told me today, I am absolutely curious! What a marvel, to be able to multiply yourself, just based on feeling strong emotions alone!" She opened a door next to one of the cabinets and beckoned you to follow her upstairs, but you hesitated and gave a nod towards the curtain. "Aren't we gonna get Alastor first?"

"Pah, he can stew a little longer in the presence of Gladys and her awful girlfriends. Maybe that'll teach him a little more appreciation for the exquisite quality of company he has gotten so awfully used to."

You giggled, and followed her up the narrow stairwell that lead into a wide, victorian-era styled living room. A Chippendale settee and chaise were located by the windows overlooking the marketplace of Cannibal Town, on the opposite side was a fireplace made out of white marble. The room was tastefully decorated, not flashy or eccentric, just comfortably simple and yet everything seemed like it was curated with care and a good amount of luxurious taste.

"You know, what you and Alastor told me had me thinking." Rosie said while she walked you over to the seating area, her hands firmly on your shoulders, and sat you down on the biggest of the three sofas. There was a soft, beige cashmere blanket draped over the armrest, and you couldn't help but let your fingers run over the silky texture. Rosie grinned at that, but continued. "While it seems like your... simulacra only extracted themselves when you were overstimulated by a strong emotion, I wonder - have you thought of willingly force them out to use them?"

Your eyebrows shot up. "Force them out? You mean, on demand? To be honest, no, I've haven't really thought about this."

"And why not?" she asked, amused. "Think about it - If you can conjure them, if they can act autonomous in your own image while you were incapacitated by the sheer force of your emotions... what would you be able to do if you'd be able to channel your feelings and guide them to do your bidding?"

You took a moment, letting the thoughts run wild in your mind. The voices in your head and the copies that had split from you had scared you, in a sense. But hadn't Alastor had kind of the same thought, after the first copy appeared? Didn't that very sentiment started the whole.... situation between the two of you? To make you face your emotions, feel and... what was the word he used? Dominate them? But then it became... forgotten almost, you realized, pushed aside by all the flaring passion and Alastor's time away and Dante and... You shook your head.

“Alastor thought so too, but... I... I'm not sure how I'd do that.” you answer, nervously curling your tail around your leg.

Rosie folded her legs elegantly, sitting cross legged opposite of you and touched her chin with the tips of her claws. "Well, it's all trial and error, dove. But I have an idea, if you are willing to experiment a little with me? Not to be crass, but I suppose you'll be more... concentrated when it's me that guides you instead of Alastor." She gave you a cheeky grin with the last sentence, and you couldn't suppress the ashamed huff that escaped you, ears flicking at the implication. She laughed, and unfolded herself as she got to her feet.

"I take that as a yes, then. Now - Close your eyes, sweetie." The world around you got dark as you followed her instructions, sitting completely still as you heard her footsteps wander behind you, and then you felt a weight on your shoulders, something soft and with a lovely, eerily familiar smell..

"Is that the blan..."

"No talking love." Rosie interjected, letting her hands run over your shoulders to drape you in what you suspected was the cashmere blanked that had laid next to you. You wondered about the reason, but her voice cut off the line of your train of thoughts, it's rich softness still pleasant and beautiful, and yet almost coaxing.

"Let's tap into happy emotions dear, I presume that's the safest for now. Think of any- and everything that makes you happy. Sift through your memories, old and new, fuzzy and vivid. Nothing is too small, nothing is irrelevant - visualize it, make it yours and focus."

You inhaled deeply, the scent of vetiver, burned wood and amber oozing from the drape around your body - and thought immediately of Alastor. It smelled so distinctly like him, of course Rosie must've planned this, and you wanted to make a remark about that but you held still. Yes, your most recent happy memories heavily involved him, so why fight it? So you let them in, his proud, burning eyes after you sang a Fuck-You to Vox, his sort-of-confession in the radio tower, his guiding hand on your back as he took you to Mimzy's... but it wasn't just him. Interwoven you also thought about Angel, singing the Time Warp with you and about the way he hugged you tight. About Husk's lit-up expression as he played the trumpet along with you. About seeing Dante again and his reassurance to support you, Charlie's thankful eyes and even Vaggie's mouthed apology.

"That's it, love, keep it up." Rosie whispered, fascination rivaling with coercion in her voice. You felt so warm, enraptured by your flooding emotions, and you visualized them as if they were played on a big movie screen, you heard your inner voices calm and only one of them talking, narrating, almost singing, recounting these moments when you truly felt happy.

Your inner vision changed, and you saw a figure sitting on a fire escape, the silhouette elegant and beautiful against the light of a rising sun, heard a calm, deep and smooth voice calling out your given name... you tried to remember who that person was as it opened its arms - a woman, slender and tall, and she turned to face you, her features slowly sharpening, a soft smile with plush lips, a straight, flawless nose, deep blue and green eyes that reflected the sun in the most beautiful way. "Don't be sad (Y/n), the Academy is only a few hours away... I'll be fine here. But you... You'll go and show the world what I've always seen in you. A diamond, ready to shine."

'Mom...', the voice whispered with you in realization, and you felt her embrace you, felt her arms around you as if she was standing right in front of you. And as she did, you fell apart in her arms.

<< Previous Chapter - Next Chapter >>

[kaledya]

Annnw that was so sweet ! What the hell 🌸🌸 Very adorable and in a same time a bit worried ? I hope you are okay ! And I'm glad our discussion make you happy and you look forward to read chapters ! But... be okay please ? I mean I wish your unhappiness won't last !

By the way I always im happy to read your answer or even laugh at what we create ! Its very cool !

In dont underestimate myself, but I keep my myself in check. Modesty is a good partner in crime 🤣

_

I didn't know for IbisPaintX ! I never draw digitally and haven't a tablet ! But I could try one day this technique ! *screen what you said to remember* thank you !!

And when I gift you or gift you back remember its a GIFT, giving back is not obligatory and should not be forced. I don't draw to have something back. It make me happy, sure, but talking is a gift too for exemple. Its my way to say thank you in better way than just words 🌸 okay ?

Care for yourself first and I will be right here on the side. Your performance of doing anything or nothing will not affect how I see you as an artist, or myself as a follower.

You deserve it or I would not draw it, I assure you 🌸🌸

_

Its nice to see you like differents fanfics ! Its better even. I don't read fanfics myself, never had, BUT I left some nice comment under his work. _

Twilight was a ride. But I was watching for the actor who played Jacob, at the time. I'm almost not sorry ahah. _

Oh interesting! I didn't know about Cain being like prisoner of his own life somewhere. That is sad ! I imagine him kind of insane with that description !

_

Its past 200 now ! So I will definitely draw Verdelet in maid outfit !!

It will be fun. *me just caring about the historically outfit*

And for Hürrem, I mean I made a first version and it was meh because it was late at night so I did it again and this is the one I sent you.

Honestly, all my character creating have two phase. One day I will put all the old version of characters together or something it could be funny !

Thank to you to have created Giovanni like what ? I need him please don't forget him ahah. Kidding.

Take care of YOURSELF ! Kaledya. Really. 🌸🌸🌸

No, no, I'm like a radish(This is an idiom means I'm perfect) or I'm right as rain., don't worry!!!! 🫂🫂🫂

I'm just a little stressed about exams, that's all!!!!

(I hate art exams)

I just wnt to say I seriously love your work! You are seriously one of my favorite authors!!

Yes me too!! I seriously have so much fun in our conversations!! It's a whirlwind of fun, chaos and creativity!!

And I agree!!! Modesty is always the best! (And of course, ıt is the best partner in crime. After all, no one wants to end up like Icarus)

And I'm really glad you didn't underestimate yourself!!

--

Yes, ibis PaintX is a really nice program, the best part is that it is free and can be downloaded even on the most rickety phones!!

Before I got a tablet for my computer, I was always drawing on my phone.Seriously, once you get used to it, it's a lot of fun.Or you can use paper sets as sketches.Convenient for creating a color palette for your OCs too!!

And Always!!!

No, no, I don't feel any forced to return it or something!!. Just love giving gifts and I really want to draw!! And the scenes you wrote and I seriously love drawing your OCs!! It's kind of like drawing fanart for a TV series I like.I feel happy when I draw,And the fact that the person I give a gift to is becomehappy is something that really makes me happy!!!

And yes, I totally agree with your opinion!!!

And thank you so much for your kind words.

----

I'm really surprised to hear you haven't read any fanfics.But I can understand, it's perfectly normal if you haven't found one that interests you.

But I'm so glad to hear that you left a kind comment under that fic!!

--

LMAO There's no need to be sorry! Even though Twilight is a highly criticized movie series, it is still a fun series to watch I don't remember ever getting bored while watching it.. And yes, I was watching it for Jacob too! (werewolves seemed really cool at that time.)

--

Yes, but also he cursed with a seriously creative curse.And I agree that a person who has lived that long has at least a little insanity.

--

Hehjejeehe I can't wait to see Verdelet in a historical maid outfit! *Prepares to slam the credit card on the table*

--

Oh okay!! And I haven't seen the 1st Version, but I'm sure it's nice, But I really love the way it is now so everything is Perfect. 🛐🛐

--

Yes, seriously, it always happens when creating OCs. The 1st version is incomplete, but it opens the door to the real concept. The 2nd version is perfection!

And I really would like to see something like this! It would seriously be fun to draw and see!!

--

I'm so glad you like Giovanni!! And don't worry, I won't forget my sneaky fox baby!!

I Will Madam!!(⁠つ⁠≧⁠▽⁠≦⁠)⁠つ❤️❤️

And take care of yourself too!!🫂❤️❤️❤️

[sullyfortress]

I'm kinda curious, do you find drawing easier digitally or traditionally? For me it's really hard to draw anything traditionally besides realistic. But you draw realistic anatomy WITH artistic liberties, so how bout you?

I'm weird in that I get in moods where I want to draw traditional and moods where I want to draw digital. Really it matters whether I wanna get dirty with traditional mediums or not. But I believe that you need a strong foundation in traditional drawing in order to do digital drawing. Even mediums that you wouldnt think are useful, can be EXTREMELY helpful. Sculpture for one helped me in drawing alot!!! Learning how to think of drawings as 3d forms and understanding light abd such. Drawing on a tablet is different than paper so you have to train your hand to adjust to the surface.

My traditional sketchbook very much is the same style I post here. My style doesn't fluctuate too much but in the beginning whenever I switched art tools my style changed. Just cause my hand didn't know what the hell it was doing.

I also find that my best ideas abd sketches come when I don't take myself seriously. I freak out sometimes that I'm not good enough at anatomy so I force myself to sketch pages upon pages of poses from referance. Practice is good, but art burnout is real so if you force yourself to make art a chore, you'll look your *sparkle*.

Before making this blog, I was in a art crisis. I felt like my stuff wasn't good enough or getting enough attention, like I wasn't strong enough in anatomy and concept, and I was forcing myself to make stuff that I just didn't like. I have major anxiety in general but like - art has been my identity since I was like 5 so the idea that I'm not peak performance sends me into a panic.

I had made it a chore abd it was literly sucking my soul.

But then I saw the new Avatar, reawakening my love for the first movie and said FUCK IT I CAN MAKE WHAT I WANT.

Long rant but to sum it up don't think. Do. Try weird shit. Art is love and when you work so hard you stop loving it draw fanart it will heal you.

[microraptorreactor]

parrying the fandom ask game back at you. 3 and 15 to you too, with a side of 22 for v2

wow we bounce eachothers attacks around just like ultrakill.....

3. Notp?

I have a couple, which are mostly just ships I don't see the dynamic for and think are kinda overrated. Red Velvet x Pastry from Cookie Run: Kingdom is my least favorite for sure. I love the characters separately but there's no way I could see them kissing. Something about Pastry fundamentally hating Red Velvet for being part cake and not really questioning that hatred makes me go bleh.

15. Have you noticed your style change over time?

ohmygod yes. I've been doing digital art since 2018 and uh. I sure have gotten better. Here's the earliest digital art I still have:

My word. Who let me touch an art tablet. I couldn't even color inside the lines T-T The airbrush, the misused gaussian blur, the god-awful cell shading, this is the embodiment of a beginner artist on DeviantArt.

Ironically all the techniques I used with that are ones I still use. cell-shaded characters with 'painted' backgrounds is still how I draw, I'm just considerably better at it. Here's some recent-ish art that uses the same methods! (+layer masks and filters. I didn't know what a clipping layer was in 2018 lmao) I definitely haven't posted before no sir.

and for writing? Gah. I don't even want to open my early fanfics they are SO BAD. I'll find a snippet of one of my early warframe works, but I apologize in advance for spelling/grammar I was a twelve year old with dyslexia. Here's two very similar scenes (an unconscious, dying character who isn't really aware of where they are being comforted), one is from a 2018 warframe fanfiction and the other I wrote recently. It's uh. A little bit of a difference. (other then that Solar lives and V2 doesn't)

22. Give us a headcanon for (V2)

Another? Alright then! Even in the canon events of Ultrakill I don't really think V2 is that aggressive. Look they run away crying with their head in their hands. They bow politely. That robot wants to curl up with a blanket but unfortunately hell says its time to kill 98420934 people.

I also think V2 has better hygiene then V1. Just in general. I think they try to keep themselves mostly clean and smelling nice. It didn't like greed because the sand got stuck in its armor and started getting caught in pistons and such, and there wasn't anywhere to wash it off. Plus a couple layers of blood and the poor thang just feels nasty.

[alanahikarichan]

🧠🐑🐡

🧠 What is a drawing tool you can't live without?

tablet tablet tablet tablet My current digital tablet is cheap as hell, and I only switched from my old monoprice because I got a new computer that was too new for my dear old tablet's drivers-- but god I remember the days of drawing and doing lineart with a mouse! I will not go back to them!

🐑 Do you listen to/watch anything while you draw?

yes! I frequently use drawing as time to also listen to a new album or band, since I'm in one place for a long time without anything else happening to my ears. (I can't watch things while drawing, but when I'm doing other crafts, I'll frequently have someone doing a different kind of craft up on youtube-- I'll do papercraft to someone sewing!-- or video essays or commentary/reaction videos.)

Last thing I was working on (that I haven't posted yet because it's for an exchange lol) got me through several Dirt Poor Robins albums (they're good but the first song of theirs I heard, But Never A Key, is still my fave).

🐡 What is something you worried about a lot when you first started, and why don't you worry about it any more?

god uhhh I started drawing and making art when I was, like, really REALLY young. My grandmother was an artist and she was teaching me about perspective and stuff years ahead of art classes! And while I don't think my art as a middleschooler or highschooler was, like... good, I think my biggest concerns at the time were how best to draw fursona paws. I guess I'm less concerned about measuring up to my favorite artists on deviantArt now?? The art I used to look at like :O!!! when I was 12 I now know relied heavily on mediums I didn't have access to as a kid (like alcohol markers) which are now way more widely available and that I can purchase for myself, AND my digital art has definitely leveled up in the past twenty years, AND a lot of the people I'm most excited to see art from aren't the people with incredibly high levels of polish-- high polish is nice and all but enthusiasm, passion, and a really funny joke or gut-punch idea are things I value a lot more now. Also I don't ever go to dA anymore so that helps lol

[shopcat]

i actually have so many digital art specific opinions obv that i just keep to myself bc i find it soo obnoxious to just be like Um actually this is how u do this just for myself bc i don't even post my work so it just feels hollow or something 😭 or like even people who do it in a normal way but are beginners themselves i would just rather die than do that. no one ever listen to me what the hell do i know.

but i think if u can't create what ur creating on a basic program like sai or something and rely too heavily on all the cool tools especially ones in procreate or even csp you can be limiting urself and ur growth. esp as a beginner to digital art or just in general .. or maybe in even kinder wording if ur art isn't working out the way u want to u need to stop muddling ur workspace with all these different brushes and overlays and textures and Hacks and stuff bc like YES they do definitely help and there is no problem with anyone using them (like as IF traditional artists use just One Brush in a painting !!! they don't) and things like i don't know that mirroring tool thing or having ur stabiliser up super high can help sometimes especially if ur going for a particular style like that but if ur feeling LOST about it i think u need to just do the digital art equivalent of using a black ball point and scribbling in a lined workbook. use some default brushes adjust them to ur liking make lots of what ur doing instead of chipping away at one Big thing and getting frustrated. is one thing.

another is it's crazy to see professional artists post on tiktok or something and the comments are like insane for the context 😭 like i don't think they need ur advice man that's wild

and third and this will get me shot at with arrows twitter and tiktok and insta all have different art communities and they are in my humble opinion so much more unbelievably better than tumblrs that it's crazy and just surrounding urself with inspiration can obviously help u as an artist so i think even just occasionally going on any of these is good for ur soul.. and also just watching tutorials and speedpaints alone still "counts" as furthering ur own art. imagine trying to sit down and do like a maths problem without having the prior explaination on how to even do it and trying to work it out like that'd be near impossible if u have little to no foundation AND if u did have that knowledge but not the equation to fill out u would still be ABLE to do it or at least try to so in that way literally Just watching tutorials can make you evolve further. y'know. watching and learning from others is GOOD and important before i even got my tablet i just spent HOURS and hours watching other artists on youtube and even tiktok Yes and i do genuinely believe it helped me a tonne and formed a good foundation and i felt less like afraid to do things. and still does help like i said.

[last-hourglass]

Dude!!! You can draw AND writing super well???? I’m on chapter 7 we’re raph meet that weird dream dragon thing and I LOVE how the art looks?? What art program do you use? Do you have any art tips, or any more writings ones?

<3 <3 you’re totally an inspiration

Awwww thank you so much!! I’m so glad you like the Red Giant art it was so much fun to draw <3

Historically all my digital art has been done using a Wacom tablet and the free art program Krita, but lately all my art for ROTTMNT has been done on Procreate on my iPad! And honestly my tips are just, abuse the HELL out of references, let yourself be fast and loose with your sketches, and when it comes to coloring, blending modes are your best friend. Color Dodge/Add/Overlay my beloveds <3 my partner complimented me recently on my Glowy Effects and that is literally just me attacking my base layers with the Soft Airbrush and then seeing what happens when I use Gaussian Blur and blending modes

as for writing tips I guess the main one is just to write, write, write like your life depends on it, remember you can always edit later but only if the words exist in the first place, and just? Have fun? ESP with fic like. Yes please use correct punctuation and PARAGRAPH BREAKS FOR THE LOVE OF GOD because otherwise it can get unbearable to read but for the creative side? Go stupid go crazy, throw spaghetti at the wall and see what sticks, we’re all here to have a good time (and just because someone else wrote a similar idea shouldn’t mean you should hold back, just look at the Peepaw Multiverse)

Look at the authors you enjoy, try and see what they do that makes their writing click and flow nicely for you, test out different formatting and tense styles and POV! My writing style is all over the place I just abuse hyphens and em-dashes and occasionally a masterpiece occurs xD

Thank you so much for this kind ask it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside 💕

[chaoxfix]

I posted 3,591 times in 2022

That's 3,591 more posts than 2021!

1,017 posts created (28%)

2,574 posts reblogged (72%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@chaoxfix

@studioboner

@gayemeralds

@passionfruitbowls

@themetalvirus

I tagged 1,872 of my posts in 2022

Only 48% of my posts had no tags

#sonic frontiers spoilers - 52 posts

#ml spoilers - 31 posts

#chaoxfix - 31 posts

#sonic the hedgehog - 19 posts

#selfref - 15 posts

#tails the fox - 13 posts

#&lt;3 - 12 posts

#miles tails prower - 12 posts

#self rec - 11 posts

#so cute - 11 posts

Longest Tag: 124 characters

#💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

had a dream that if enough day/night cycles have passed, hermit koco won’t let you power up again until you take a nap, because “all the speed and rings in the world won’t help if you’re too exhausted to use them”

then he watched over sonic as he slept through the night, chatting with any digitized friend who stopped by

…a guy could write a fic about that, you know.

262 notes - Posted November 9, 2022

#4

can’t believe it’s canon that the games are just based off of the characters ‘real life’ adventures

guys this legit explains weird narrative discrepancies in each game, where different POVs don’t line up. they just interviewed different characters who told biased perspectives of events.

386 notes - Posted November 14, 2022

#3

i’m allergic to digital art (or rather my tablet is allergic to me) but i hope u like it! @tsaikonautz same drawing different style challenge

391 notes - Posted June 16, 2022

#2

i now have a hc that sonic does have an apartment in station square but he basically never sleeps there, maybe once a month

he instead uses it as a storage shed for all of the merch people make of him

bc whats he gonna do, turn down a really cool mural the city made in his honor? no. hes gonna put that shit up in his living room. his friends call him egotistical but jokes on them, he looks cool as hell.

he also has

a freezer full of sonic popsicles. the fucked up ones. u know. (ty @sketchjii for reminding me these exist)

a fridge full of sports drinks with his face on the label. some officially sponsored, some knockoffs with 'socin the hengehog', who is a slightly lighter blue hedgehog. he thinks its hilarious

boxes upon boxes of frozen chili dogs, from every brand deal he's ever done who promised him a lifetime supply and are starting to sweat from making good on it

hoodies for humans that imitate his look (he loves the ones with fake ears and fake gloves. they look fucking hilarious on top of his own ears and gloves)

every variation of sonic plushie ever made. especially the deformed looking ones. the ugly ones are usually from knuckles. ("got you this. its like looking in a mirror right?" "hilarious.")

plushies of all his friends

a super sonic shower curtain from a then-6 year old tails to 'make him feel brave while taking a bath! :D'

giant fuzzy slippers that are meant to look like his shoes

his fridge door has drawings from charmy, cream, and some from tails when he was little(r)

hes got a bookcase with a bunch of books. some haunted. some not. a few scrapbooks mixed in, old textbooks tails read when he was a kid and was gonna toss out but has a lot of funny notes in the margins

he also has a trophy case to hold his many sonic & mario olympic games trophies

last i'll mention is he's even got a little eggman matryoshka doll that sits on his fridge. he just thinks its funny

if he ever dies young itll be a really fun museum exhibit. he gives one (1) apartment tour to some photographer who's way out of his depth but it's honestly kinda funny how nonchalant sonic is about all the merch of himself he collects

428 notes - Posted September 6, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

“love is stored in the child i adopted while i was also a child”

441 notes - Posted June 15, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[jerirose]

how long have you been drawing? i used to be really into drawing when i was in high school but a chronic illness has made it really hard for me to hold things like pencils, pens, markers, and styluses so i had to give it up. you're just really good with your art and i'm super jealous.

Hi Anon!

Firstly, please don't be jealous 😔 though I very much understand where you are coming from and I'm so sorry that Chronic Illness has taken away something you love (I can very much relate).

Secondly, to answer your question I've been drawing literally since I could hold a pencil! I was ambidextrous as a child (left hand dominant) and my dad loves to tell me stories of how I'd work on two completely different drawings at once, sometimes at different stages of each drawing. That was until school forced me to use my right hand and I lost my left-handedness and my ambidextrousness.

I drew all the way up until High School as well, I was an A+ student in Art Class but my teachers weren't great and since I was a "gifted child" my parents really, really fed into it and milked it for all they could, which really tainted my love for art, so I dropped my pencil for a camera when I was 15 and pursued that as a career and went on to college to study photography. Chronic illness and disability took that from me so I understand how much it hurts and how sad it can be loosing a creative outlet you love.

I do traditional art now once in a blue moon, basically whenever the mood hits and I've done digital art on and off for the last 8 years, mostly painting one or two things a year and then not touching my tablet again (because I couldn't get my hand-eye coordinationnto work and it was annoying), until last June when I decided for some strange reason to get an XP-Pen, I've literally no idea why or what drove me to do so, but made it far easier for me to do digital art, even though it took me like 3 weeks after it arrived to touch it. (I'm literally so stubborn and I will continuly try to find ways to do what I want to pursue). And I've been doing art seriously, for the first time since I was 15, since July last year. (And by seriously I mean, I work on my art skills most days for at least 2 hours if my health/body permits it, sometimes (like yesterday 11 hours) please don't be me 😅 it's less than healthy but I do take a lot of breaks)

I have a neurological disorder that makes anything and everything I do painful and there are some days where holding my stylus is very painful, but again, I'm stubborn as hell and if I can push past the pain I will - I also take breaks frequently throughout my art sessions and do lots and lots of hand exercises too! But it can be difficult and on some days I can't even hold my phone or type because the pain is too bad and it's very disheartening, so I completely get how you feel and I know that me pushing through the pain is something that not everyone can do in my situation either.

[hermitcatlongposts]

What is this game?

I mean it is a video game indeed. What does it really mean to me? What does this game stand for? Why is it being made at all?

What I'm about to say next is gonna be so hazardously cliche that you might wanna brace yourself. The journey of developing this game was a journey of self discovery. Yes I too am cringing at what I said. But not self discovery as in oh I didn't know who I was and now I suddenly do. I always knew who I was since young age. It's discovery of how intense the "who I am"-ness goes. In fact, someone more sane and reasonable than me would say it's so much that it's counterproductive.

I actually did talk about a platformer game I used to work on like a year ago at SubscribeStar. I gave up on it because I was making it just because I was told by my environment at the time that it's the best route for beginners. I like neither "minimalist" graphics nor platformer genre. Also making vector art was so painful for me.

So the significance of my current touhou clone project is that I said fuck you to "minimalist" vector art and started drawing normal, raster art with my mouse. Drawing with mouse was of course equally painful but the difference was that I tapped into my dormant passion for art, like not just a general loose definition of art such as banana taped on wall, but specifically "moving my hands around and laying pigment on a canvas". Digital equivalent, of course. Shortly followed by buying a drawing tablet.

So what this game initially was going to be was just a prototype purely for the sake of learning the ways of programming a bullet hell and a complete game (as opposed to gamejam). But the jagginess of a mouse drawn sprites were just too unbearably and physically painful to look at and it was nothing less than a necessity to redraw with my beloved drawing tablet so at least it'll have smooth edges, easy on the eyes.

hey, amazing opportunity to have a look at old artworks

But, even after all these years of being a game developer I was still hilariously naive. Technically the first game I ever made was in fucking 2015. The first one to be uploaded on the internet was in 2017. It's unbelievable how I still thought foolishly like "Oh yeah I can finish this game in just 3 months. Ha, see ya soon as a proud developer of a released title."

Anyways, the point is that after such a long time of working on it, I suddenly couldn't see myself just throwing it away as a prototype intended for no one to seriously play it. So the game evolved into "at least a proper game". Which was actually a great decision because, I could release an utterly bare bone prototype that only just serves to have the core idea of a bullet hell touhou clone in terms of programming. But if I did that, I would spend ten years on my second project because that would-be prototype is still nowhere near enough of a programming school. What I didn't realize in the past is how enormous the difference between just spewing out prototype code and meticulously developing a full game with all little mini-mechanics and mini-systems working in harmony. So by spending more time on my first project, I will be spending less time on my second.

I thought that's what the game was gonna be. Just a nice and proper game that I won't feel any shame about purposefully making it garbage like I was originally planning to. Someone sane might say that would be very reasonable place to stop but here comes the part where I expand upon what I said at the beginning about it being a journey of realization of the depths of my personality coming at a detriment of productivity, as in how fast I produce products.

You know how the dress of my player character looks. It's a reference to that platformer game. I am a craftsman through and through (please don't take it as I'm jerking my own dick, I'm just trying to communicate myself clearly). I have emotional connection to my creations for I see them as something that is real and has meaning. I'm not a producer pumping out products on a conveyor belt feeding the bottomless vortex of consumerism. So instead of completely cutting that old platformer game out of my life like it was nothing at all, I decided to pay homage to it as elements in my current game. Basically an easter egg that only extremely few, like 2 or 3 people will recognize. Although it was abandoned for legitimate reasons, I respect it as my first attempt at serious, non-gamejam game. And I immortalize it's legacy this way.

You might remember this flipping tile thing was actually made long ago. But instead of having just a random nothing as a texture, I made it a throwback to one of the key elements of Square Heart (the name of the platformer game, btw), the iconic blue crates and outlines that light up when the player walks over them. Btw the loading is intentionally slowed down to show the spinning border lights more clearly. It doesn't load that slowly in reality lol. Wait, that means players are not gonna really see the thing I spent so much time making...

This is how the player would respawn. Just pop right back up. I mean there is nothing wrong with it. It's a classic animation in all the arcade shooter games.

What I decided to do however is a throwback to how the player character of SquareHeart respawned.

This one is gonna appear in only one of the 5 stages because only one has a night sky. This is the iconic minimalist gradient trees that I tried so hard in SquareHeart to be the main attraction. I actually always planned to have no background at all in this game for the sake of not getting way too ridiculously ahead of myself for a first game. Just plop down the skybox I found on the Unity Asset Store. Now that I decided to do this in one of the stages, I have pushed the standard so I have to figure out something for other stages as well. Also the speeding up you see is not the default but just a short section. Inspired by stage 4 of Touhou 8: Imperishable Night, where the boss tries to run away mid-fight and you chase after them. "Chasing" as in just the background scrolling faster, nothing else really.

The bomb, or what's modernly referred to as SpellCard of the player is a legacy that's actually truly lost. Long long ago in 2019, there was an ancestral version of SquareHeart that featured a cutscene that focuses on this circle flower-like talisman thingy. Literally only one person might remember it besides myself.

This one is not part of the SquareHeart. But if you remember, before I actually started to draw, the player character of my bullet hell was a vector art butterfly. In fact, it all started from a game-jam I wrote a blogpost about right here on Tumblr a long time ago. In fact, if I remember correctly that blogpost is the very reason why I created a Tumblr account to begin with. So this butterfly too won't be forgotten. It's now on the other side as a mini-boss. And every other stages will also have butterflies of different design as their mini-bosses.

And, yeah et cetera. There is actually at least one more easter egg to make but I'm yet to come to a final design decision.

I want this game to be actually something more than "just a proper game for the sake of being a proper game", let alone a throwaway prototype. I want this game to have an actual self to stand solid and have meaning to me. And that meaning is that it's the first step of my journey as an artist ("art" as in a form of indie games, not just visual illustration) but also a rightful payment of respect to my first step as just game developer in general. The past should be put to rest respectfully so the future shall flourish in full force.