#he get biting tics hehe

[didderd]

Oh I have a question for tac (wonderful name), since he has been freshly added to the roster >:)))

Do you have to be careful of your sharp teeth and having particularly violent or aggressive SH tics? Like do you find yourself hurting yourself on them sometimes or do you not worry about it?

Very curious 👀

Tac: Uh.. heh.. (He looks down at his scarred and chipped hands and forearms. A good few of the scars being caused by tics that grazed his teeth, or even involved his teeth. A few bitemarks here and there.) Yeah, sometimes. 'S no big deal tho. (He shrugs and waves a hand dismissively.)

[hestiashand]

Drop those team taka head cannons

omg i adore team taka altho i feel i don’t even have the most particularly interesting headcanons for them LOL a lot of them will be design headcanons bc thats what i normally think of as an artist hehee uhm.. i’ll start with suigetsu bc i love suigetsuuuuu

for suigetsu as shown in my drawing of him from today i like the thought of him dying the tips of his hair blue….. the way the anime shades his hair is far too cool to accept it’s shading and not act like those are dyed tips….

[ ID: two screenshots of suigetsu. END ID. ]

like cmonnnnn the blue tips are the coolest thing in the world. it is NOT shading TO ME ☝️☝️☝️☝️ also i didn’t draw this in my recent suigetsu bc i forgot when i was drawing it 😢😢 but i do imagine he has scabs on his lips and around his mouth often from accidentally biting his lip T.T sometimes i bite too hard and draw blood i can only imagine having sharp teeth and doing that T.T also he wears smudged eyeliner. uh this ones maybe kinda obvious but to me he doesn’t have much of a sense of boundaries and doesn’t have much shame in his body so T.T being his roommate would be a constant battle to make sure he walks around the apartment in *some* clothes. like by everything holy just *something*

this one is absolutely not based at all but it’s my brain and i can do to jūgo as i please with it ☝️☝️ and i like to imagine jūgo likes to wear accessories on his head a lot. like hair clips, hats, maybe he starts growing it out a bit more and ties parts of it up. it catches little birdies attentions more too which he enjoys and is a bonus other than it just being cute to me. to me he’s also the friend that carries around a big bag to hold everyones shit in when they get tired of carrying their own stuff. like yeah man just toss it in… it adds nothing i already have anything you could imagine in here anyways. y’know y’know. most of my jūgo headcanons are not based at all ajksjsjss i’m sorry but i also like to imagine he might pick up smth like woodworking/carving maybee knitting/crotchet (but i lean most towards wood carving) to keep himself distracted and occupied. less likely to have episodes and intrusive thoughts for him. obviously doesn’t stop everything but it helps the tiniest but plus it’s fun :) i think if he were to do carvings and stuff he’d give like a few to his friends if it was smth they specifically liked but i think he kinda likes and prefers to just leave them around, to either be lost to time or be found by someone else! i think he has lots of scars on his hands and knuckles— between the wood carving and his rampages i think his hands take quite the damage. and y’all know i like scars so i ignore any jutsu that may deter scar creation so to me he defo gets scars. except suigetsu’s jutsu actually.. i dont think suigetsu gets scars at all.

i like to imagine karin with a bunch of neat kind of earrings. anything fun/funky. also she has one industrial piercing too to me.. sasuke has two of them but karin had one before she knew sasuke did 😭😭 just a coincidence she swears she swearssss. this one would like.. technically be canon anyways in the first half but bc of all the bite marks she has n stuff her skin would be suuuper bumpy… i think she probably doesn’t like people touching her cause strangers/non team taka end up commenting on how gross it is T.T she prolly wears long sleeves as much as she can. which i rlly don’t know much about boruto but i think long sleeves in that one is canon too. i like to work with out of canon clothings so even then if i end up starting a karin fashion board it would have strictly long sleeve outfits in it. also i like to imagine her with some vocal tics. i dont imagine her with tourettes but just a small tic disorder. i think she mostly does like clicking sounds and hums… not any words or anything :) also i feel like her eyesight is just constantly getting worse and worse. i imagine she’s legally blind but still it gets worse. when she’s older like maybe her 50s or 60s she goes blind and just relies on only sensing ppls chakra to know who’s around w/o asking. i mean she heavily relies on that anyways even when she does have eyesight.. i like to just think she uses it a lot instead of straining her eyes when her prescription starts changing.

uhm and for sasuke some more team taka centred headcanons instead of just some hcs in general… i mean i’ll just state the obvious here because soooo many ppl tend to ignore this but. team taka are sasukes best friends…. not the rest of the konoha 12… so jot that one down. i feel like even when they branch off and do their own thing (again idk anything about boruto none of that is canon to me akshjshsjsjs so don’t be like “uhmm well actually 🤓🤓”) they like to keep in contact. even if not often they’ll send messages. i like to think if they’re aware they’re gonna end up being somewhere near-ish the others they’ll all go out of their way to pay a visit. uh also i DONT think this actually happened like it’s not a headcanon of mine but i do think the thought of suigetsu being sasukes first (very short term) bf is a funny thought…. it does not last tho cause anytime they’re tryna talk about sweet things and their thoughts sasuke just talks about naruto T.T again i dont actually headcanon that happening but it is a funny thought to me… uhm also i don’t particularly think there’s a moment in which this would end up happening but i do think that out of all of team taka sasuke trusts jūgo the most to just… have a personal conversation with. like he doesn’t go out of his way to ever talk about personal shit with him, but i think if a situation were to come up in which he had to/felt like he needed to i think jūgo would be the one he’d go to c:

most importantly no matter how much they do argue with each other team taka does all love eachother.. and they certainly stay friends for life. even if they don’t talk much i think they will all always consider them a group of friends that they can just send messages to without the thought of it being strange after it being so long. it doesn’t even have to be some kind of important message either. just a little random message whenever they think of it.

[fictionfixations]

oc-insert

resigned to never writing multi-chaptered and naruto fics because 1. procrastination. 2. id say id need to watch naruto first to write anything about it, even if ive read an absurd amount of time travel fics, yknow?

so. uh. here. this is old. i dont need these notes anymore. so im dumping them here.

-----------------------------

the oc test: insert into naruto

no but seriously theres a stupidly large amount of more oc-inserts in naruto then any other fandom ive seen and that might be because of dreaming of sunshine (finally succumbed and read it. its not bad but my first instinct is 1. not to read first person. 2. not to read female pov. but there was a really good naruto x hp crossover with female harry. and i just had to bite the bullet at that point aghh.) i mean. im not trying to be sexist with it. but i mean. ive read way too many male/nonbinary povs that im just used to it. two, i got horribly dysphoric over she/her, although its better now (i was just in a really bad place mentally) but since i avoided it, now i avoid it out of habit and sometimes f/m relationships make me cringe. and thats probably because ive always seen the really bad ones portrayed which whoops

anyway reinen!! my beloved oc who ive only written once (in khr) which is a crime and i should write more. he/they pronouns my precious …they're probably eccentric enough that they'd belong to a clan. their appearance, he usually has his eyes closed like ranpo from bsd (but can still see), and sometimes opens their eyes in moments of shock or seriousness or something something (they have golden eyes)

also they have white hair.

they're portrayed with tan skin cause i have tan skin (reinen was originally meant to be like an oc for me the creator instead of making it look like me like i had before. but then it became something entirely different lmfao. reinens not an author insert because they're nothing like me hehe) but i honestly dont care what color skin they have? i dont even mention appearances half the time cause i always forget to write it

naruto-sasuke-reinen

i know sakura gets bashed on a lot (and i adore bamf sakura) and seen as the weak link or 'civilian' but hgiuf

or maybe. reinens a hatake (Hatake Rei). younger then kakashi but maybe as a assistant sensei for team 7???

naruto vocal tics (is tics the right word?)

Kakashi: maa maa (well well)

Naruto: Dattebayo! (Y'know! or Believe it!)

Kushina: Dattebane? (Yeah?)

Sasuke: hnn. (hnn.)

I'm realizing I write 'yo' a lot as a greeting

alternatively is ciao, which might be because they're first introduced in khr. as someone with mafia ties. italian. yknow.

so now i just. kind of connect reinen with italian.. ;-;

reinen being more lean and flexible? graceful in a sense. i always think of them as a performer.

although. really good at T&I? well it's less torture and more on the interrogation aspect. leaning more towards.. kunoichi aspects. i think. (they're androgynous. think epel felmier from twisted wonderland because its pretty close in appearance actually) seduction probably. (where kakashi hides his appearance, reinen flaunts it probably [kakashi pointy hair, reinen curled hair]) scarily good at acting

conflict conflict like: kakashi: you shouldve been their sensei. reinen: no-- what?? kakashi: you're better. reinen: that's not… listen. they need you. i can help them on other aspects, but im not nearly as good at being on the frontlines. your team to me looks like they'll be a bunch of heavy hitters, and i cant do that. im not good at rushing in, that's not my fighting style. i get that you feel like you're broken, that you feel like you're going to ruin them. but listen. If you don't believe me on anything else, believe me on this. It's not about you. It's about your kids. So what if you 'don't deserve them' or 'you'll get them killed'? They don't have anyone else to turn to! And you know I'm busy with other responsibilities. I can't take over your job as sensei, because that's not my job. You were assigned that job and you better do it, or I swear Kakashi. What are you going to do when they die because you didn't bother to train them properly? 'You don't know how'? You have so many people you have connections to that would be willing to help if you just ask! I know Gai's had a team for a year, he'd be overjoyed to help. Or you could at least pull a few favors, I know you have a bunch of those to get other people to train them, but you can't just leave them in the deep end. That's the thing about responsibility over people. You don't do something, other people suffer. So get it together. you don't need to be perfect

Dammit, Kakashi, those kids love you already. They adore you! They don't need you to be the best, they just need you to be there. Okay? And. Maybe this is cruel. But you're not dead. They don't need you anymore. You know who does? The living people around you. That are breathing and moving. I get that maybe you won't ever feel over it, not really, but you can't prioritize them over the living. I think you should be there more often, okay? Let them know that you're first priority will always be them, not whatever they think you're doing while you're running late and still not appearing. Let them know they can trust you to be there for them. And if you can't, let them know. Indra knows those kids need an adult in their life they can trust.

(i cant find any naruto swears in place of stuff. in some uchiha-centered fics they use like Amaterasu! or Indra, i think, although im not sure how reinen would know it. but shut up i dont know of a person and i dont think god is valid here. …that is an oddly funny part. 'i don't think god is valid here'. hehehe..)

They need someone in their corner. You can be that person. Sakura has civilian parents, they wouldn't be able to understand her and she'd have no one to vent to. Maybe she'll go to you or me, we can't force her, but what we can do is make it clear she has an option. That she doesn't have to keep it inside, and that we have a lending ear for her. I can't be that alone because I won't always be free for them. I'm not their sensei, I can't excuse myself from work for them, but you can. I can't do it all for you.

Naruto has never actually had someone who'd be there for him, who'd listen, and maybe even do anything for him. I don't think he even knows it's a thing that people usually do for those they care about! Sure, there's Iruka-san but he also has responsibilities over other children, and honestly probably overworked.

The Sandaime? The hokage is meant to be unbiased.

He can't just take a break to care about some orphan nobody likes. He doesn't even stop by that often, no matter how much he probably wants to. Naruto can't rely on him to be on his side all the time.

You can be there.

Sasuke's lost in grief and anger. He hasn't had anyone to talk it through, to actually move past it. Everyone had been too worried about catching a rogue jounin, not about how traumatized a harmless little kid might've been.

…

he was left with the consequences alone. you know how that feels. remember? good ol dad was too disgraced, nobody wanted to clean the compound. you had to do it. scrubbing it off the floors.

wanna bet sasuke had to do the same? or maybe there were cleaners, but whose to say they didn't miss a spot or two? is it any better, in a place that was once filled with people, to be entirely empty? we moved for a reason sasuke deserves the same.

help him. i was too young, you did all the work then in finding somewhere else. if not opening up our home to him, then you could at least help him in the process. make it easier.

------------

wow thats long

[ao3feed-zukka]

no doubts, no more fears

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/PiRCopq

by thatwasanticlimactic

A shuddered gasp slipped past his lips, and his neck arched back so intensely that his body moved along with it. “Shit!” he hissed. “Sorry.”

“You’re fine,” Zuko replied softly, yawning. “You’re allowed to tic.”

Sokka paused, biting his lip and looking up at Zuko’s face. His eyes were still closed, the muscles in his face relaxed, a small, content smile at his lips.

“Are you sure?”

Zuko cracked an eye open, and Sokka felt his cheeks heat up when he was caught staring. There was a fond sort of look in Zuko’s eyes—one that reminded Sokka of joy or rays of sunlight. “I’m sure,” he said. “Don’t suppress for this—it’s not worth it.”

[or: sokka just wants to cuddle zuko but worries that his tics were ruining it lol]

Words: 4002, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Series: Part 2 of like a tale still yet to be told [ts month fics]

Fandoms: Avatar: The Last Airbender

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: M/M

Characters: Sokka (Avatar), Zuko (Avatar)

Relationships: Sokka/Zuko (Avatar)

Additional Tags: Cuddling & Snuggling, Post-Canon, Established Relationship, Sokka Has Tourette's Syndrome (Avatar), Autistic Zuko (Avatar), zuko is a portable heating pad, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Tourette's Syndrome, Sokka Needs a Hug (Avatar), he gets one hehe, zuko Also gets one because. cuddles., Zukka Week 2022 (Avatar)

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/PiRCopq

[soobasaur]

HONEYYYYYYYY

hi :D

Good news got my scheduling done and I can now tic-tac while moving and crouch while moving on my skateboard. Also Jisung is def the type to do the lip bite face and do the 👈👉👈👉 thing yk? Also he’s the type to do a hehe but airy ewww he would chuckle airy XDDD like how the boys do it on straight tiktok like a dry chuckle eewww XDD

How have you been? :) -•^•

hi bub~

yay good job on getting ur scheduling done <3 and that’s great!! look at u go

i just finished the anime sk8 the infinity and now know what that means 😄

LMAO i can see him doing that meme lip bite face AND A DRY CHUCLLEKDK when he does it it would be attractive

sorry for the late reply rhis got drowned in my notifs :/

[ua-monoma]

.01.13.

Before the Interrogation: @ua-hawks​

[Hawks had known that this was the day that Monoma's questioning was scheduled. He asked, specifically, when it'd be and if he'd be allowed to visit beforehand. Not to question him about anything, he assured, just to see him. He hasn't since the rescue, after all, and it felt cruel to keep away for that long.

So he comes in early, hoping to catch Monoma before they've started. The officers there don't exactly ask as much as confirm what he's there for and then lead him to the room Monoma's in, waiting ever so patiently.

He waves them off when they're there, rapping his knuckles against the door a few times before slipping in, giving him a lazy half-smile.

Monoma looks up the second he hears the knock on the door, a sheepish smile on his face as Hawks comes in. He can't help but make himself smaller at the sight of him, a thousand different instincts fighting to mold him at once, and he ducks his head a little under his hair, biting his lip from nerves before he glances towards him again.]

MONOMA: ... Hi...

[Hawks notices the change in his demeanor. It's hard not to, with it always being so drastic. He knows how much Monoma's always trying to fit into a mold, a vision that he thinks is right, that should be given to the person he's around.

He walks to the side of the table Monoma's at, turning to lean against it rather than sit on the other side and feel so far away. It doesn't suit them.]

HAWKS: Hey, kid... how're you doin'? Excited for how thrilling this is gonna be? [His arms cross while he chuckles.]

MONOMA: I mean, a little bit...

[He tries to fight the smile that tugs at his lips but he can't help but beam a little just watching him. Hawks always seems so at ease, it's contagious.] 

MONOMA: It'll be a bit more entertaining than the last few times, is what I'm hoping...

HAWKS: Yeah, that's always a good hope... 

[Hawks hums. He sits on that for a moment, thinking. About Monoma. What he did. Why he's here. He's not careless. He knows what this means.] 

HAWKS: ...

MONOMA: ... I've been trying to practice that lately... 

[Monoma mutters after a few seconds of silence, sheepish again as he admits what sounds incredibly childish coming out of his mouth.] 

MONOMA: This... being hopeful thing... I tend to be more of a pessimist about these sort of matters, but I'm trying to look at the bright side for once...

HAWKS: Yeah..? 

[Hawks smiles, tilting his head, admiring what Monoma's saying.] 

HAWKS: That's good. It's important. I don't think you can get anywhere being a hero if you're not hopeful, y'know... plus it's good after stuff like this, trying to work on that shit.. even if it was a tragedy you still learned a lot and grew, might as well take advantage of it, right...

[Monoma nods slowly, feeling a little more solemn as the topic continues on.] 

MONOMA: Well... I am adept at taking advantage of a situation... or, at least, I like to think I am...

[Another nod as he reaches for a lock of his hair, fiddling with it.] 

MONOMA: I hope you know, I appreciate everything you've said and done for me... To think I can still be a hero after all this... [He laughs weakly, a dry little chuckle at his own expense.] Another exercise in optimism right there... It's just so hard to believe, mm...

HAWKS: Mm.. 

[Hawks reaches out to ruffle the hair Monoma's so nervously toying with, interrupting the nervous tic.] 

HAWKS: Anybody worth anything thinks so too, I promise... all your teachers and friends... no matter what went on while you were there, you're still a hero.

MONOMA: Ah... 

[Monoma flushes pink with surprise as Hawks so easily reaches out to him, then closes his eyes as his hair is ruffled, leaning into the feeling. Even with his visits with Shouto, he still feels absolutely ravenous for physical attention, and it feels nice...]

MONOMA: ... Thank you... [he murmurs.] Hopefully I don't disappoint, then...

HAWKS: I know you won't. 

[Hawks sighs, letting the hand on his head drop to cradle his face for a moment, reassuring him, before it falls away.] 

HAWKS: Even if you don't become a Hero I know you'll always be doing something good for the world..

MONOMA: ... 

[The blush doesn't fade. If anything, it deepens into red as he opens his eyes again, meeting his gaze before he watches his hand drop away from his cheek. He doesn't know what to say.]

MONOMA: ...  Thank you...

[Hawks shrugs.] 

HAWKS: I'm just tellin' the truth. You're a good kid, and we all know it. Good kids do bad things sometimes. I did some wild shit, you should ask Shichirou... probably has countless stories about what a trainwreck I was.

[Monoma pouts a little, though he keeps his usual protests about being referred to as a child at bay.] 

MONOMA: You shouldn't tempt me, I'll actually ask... And who knows what I'd do with that kind of information, heheh...

[Hawks laughs, bracing himself against the table while he thinks about what his guardian would say.] 

HAWKS: Please do, I'd love to hear about what he tells you..

[Monoma gigges a little, warm and happy at the thought of drawing a laugh from him.]

MONOMA: Then I will... Soon as we're done here... It'll be the first thing I do! Hehe...

HAWKS: Yeah? [He grins,] have fun with that... make sure he tells you somethin' good, too.

MONOMA: I will...

[He trails off, looking away, a hand clutched to his stomach as his solemn mood returns.] 

MONOMA: I... I hope, um... [He frowns to himself.] ... I really don't think I can apologize enough for... what happened... and what I tried to do to... I wasn't... okay...

[He shrugs a little, struggling to speak even as his voice tightens and his chest aches at the thought.]

MONOMA:  ... And I'm still not... but I really want to try to be... and I plan to cooperate all I can, really... And I just... um... I hope we can still talk. Like this. Because... this is really nice... 

[He makes a weak attempt to look his way again, a pained smile on his lips.] 

MONOMA: I hate that I tried to ruin this...

[Hawks stops him from saying anymore once he can tell he's finished, putting his hand into his hair again.] 

HAWKS: You don't have to apologize. I know you were in a rough spot. 

[He pulls him into a hug, mostly holding onto his head because of the position they're in, massaging his scalp through his soft hair.] 

HAWKS: You can talk to me anytime you want...

MONOMA: ...

[Monoma clutches to him tightly, burying his face against him. He's still on suppressants that stop him from automatically tugging his quirk into him, making the embrace feel a little more hollow than it should, but it's still enough to make him shudder and fight tears. He's missed this...]

MONOMA: Thank you...

HAWKS: Of course... 

[He sighs, wings slowly wrapping around the boy in his arms.] 

HAWKS: You need someone to be there for you.

[Monoma nuzzles against him, clinging hard.] 

MONOMA: Yeah... thank you...

HAWKS: Mhm... 

[He keeps him there like that as long as he can before he has to pull away, knowing they'll want to be starting soon.] 

HAWKS: ... I should probably go... [He chuckles.] Didn't even mean to stay this long...

[Monoma just barely keeps himself from digging his nails in, wanting to keep clinging forever. There's a pout on his face as they seperate and he starts to fidget, staring down at his hands as he keeps them on his lap.]

MONOMA: Okay... are you going to be watching for what happens...? 

[He’s quiet, glancing towards one of the cameras he knows is in the room.] 

MONOMA: They didn't really tell me much about what this is supposed to be...

[Hawks frowns at the question, glancing at the time and then following Monoma's glance to the camera.] 

HAWKS:... Maybe for a while. I still have to work, but I can try to stay for a bit...

MONOMA: ... 

[He nods slowly.] 

MONOMA: I don't want to get in the way of your work...

[He fidgets a little more.] 

MONOMA: I'm just a little nervous...

HAWKS: It's fine, I can stay a little while longer... 

[He smiles for him.] 

HAWKS: Plus I know that you'll still be in good hands.

[Monoma tries to muster up a small smile back.] 

MONOMA: I hope so...

HAWKS: You will. It might be a little rough, not everyone trusts you, but as long as you tell the truth it'll be okay.

MONOMA: ...

[Monoma stares down at his hands. That's the hardest part... He's still not even sure he can do it.] 

MONOMA: ... I'm scared... I don't want to be treated like a criminal anymore...

HAWKS: ... At this point, most of us have to operate assuming you were one.

[He shrugs.] 

HAWKS: ... We don't know the full story. We don't know what happened, to you or because of you. That's why you're here.

[Monoma nods slowly, grimacing to himself. It's obvious that's not quite what he wanted to hear.] 

MONOMA: ...

[Hawks sighs, giving his hair one last pet before he stands up straight.] 

HAWKS: I'll see you later.

[He nods again, tensing in an instant the second he starts to rise.] 

MONOMA: ...

HAWKS: It'll be alright. 

[He offers one last small smile before he leaves, closing the door gently behind him.]

MONOMA: ... 

[The only thing that moves for a moment are his eyes, flitting towards the camera before returning to the door. Easily, he's terrified, a small sound of distress leaving him as he craves Hawks' return.] 

MONOMA: ...

[hinabes]

Cheese’s Backstory

Another facet to the Pizza trio’s story. Read the other two to get the full scope of what’s going on.

[ Cassata ]

[ Pizza ]

Warmth

“Ahh~ I’m stuffed~”

I pat my belly——bulging from being stuffed with food, and joyously returned to my napping Master Attendant. Due to her sickly body, only under the afternoon sunlight do her pale, thin cheeks show the warmth of life.

“So sleepy…”

Leaned against Master Attendant’s bed, I yawned and dozed off under the warm sunlight.

When I woke up, Master Attendant was happily chatting it up with another Food Soul.

This guy who always talks about this and that with Master Attendant is Pizza.

He’s the Food Soul of the King of this kingdom, my Master Attendant’s father.

Pizza visits Master Attendant every day, always bringing with him a small daisy for the vase by Master Attendant’s bed.

The daisy is Master Attendant’s favorite flower, and the King even made it the national flower to honor that.

That’s why daisies are planted throughout the castle grounds, every blossom like a little piece of joy, piecing together this little kingdom.

Of course, there’s another reason for Master Attendant to be overjoyed. Every time he visits her, he brings with him new stories about the kingdom and the outside world.

This is something that I cannot accomplish, always being by Master Attendant’s side.

Even though Master Attendant is the Princess of the kingdom, rarely does she leave her quarters.

Not for lack of desire, rather due to inability.

Being weak since birth, her naturally sickly body has always been feeble.

The King worries that the noisy atmosphere of the castle would interfere with her rest, and thus restricted her to the most secluded, quiet corner of the castle, awaiting doctors to treat her.

It is for that reason too that the King, busy with royal duties, isn’t free to visit his daughter, ever absent from her upbringing, in addition to her having long since lost her mother.

Alas, Master Attendant never expresses her woes to me, always silently gazing at the view outside the window.

And whenever there’s a disturbance, she immediately looks towards the still-closed door in anticipation.

She’s always awaiting a visit from the King, I know that much.

Like a representative of the King, as his Food Soul, Pizza’s visits have become ever more frequent.

One day, Pizza didn’t visit unexpectedly, and Master Attendant nervously questioned me.

“Why isn’t Pizza here yet? Has something happened to Father?”

“No way! Pizza probably just sneaked out to have fun, and hasn’t returned yet! Hmm, perhaps he’s being chased around by the stray dogs outside the castle grounds as we speak.”

“Is that so…”

Master Attendant’s response cements her expression of disappointment, her words in a completely different tone than when chatting and joking with Pizza.

But why? I’m making the same type of funny remarks as Pizza.

Master Attendant’s focus is always on Pizza, even though I’m by her side every day, I just can’t reassure her so.

What should do to make her happy?

I pondered for a long time and even started imitating Pizza’s every silly sentence, every childish tic.

“Eh? Cheese, why are you staring at me?”

As if he felt my gaze, Pizza cupped his head in his hands, sitting across from me, smile brighter than ever.

“I wasn’t~”

“Cheese, you eat so much cheesecake, you sure you’re not gonna get fat? … Hmm……”

Stuck between getting mad and laughing, I shoved the remaining cheesecake into Pizza’s mouth.

“How could you be so rude to a fair, young girl such as I!”

“Ughhhh...Ack……”

Choking on cake, Pizza couldn’t say a word.

His funny expression, however, caused Master Attendant to burst into laughter, as rarely as she does.

Of course, that wasn’t all that delighted me.

“Hehe, that’s right, little Cheese here is so adorable, how could she ever get fat~”

Master Attendant reached out to me, gesturing for me to sit beside her.

I couldn’t help but be overcome by a wave of warmth.

“Hmph! That’s right! I’m a magical girl, desserts are the source of my magic power!”

“Yes, it’s all thanks to Cheese’s magic, I feel my body improving every day~”

I know that I don’t have any magic, and I’m sure Master Attendant knows as well.

But even so, I wave my fork to cast a spell every morning and evening, to send a prayer to the gods above.

A prayer for my Master Attendant to recover soon.

“Yes, I’m sure you’ll recover.”

I gazed at Master Attendant, wishing her the brightest, warmest smiles.

Tears

The gentle breeze of the month of Azure Skies has yet to be sullied by the summer heat, a white dove breaking the stillness of the clear, cloudless sky once in a while.

On this delightful day, Master Attendant was allowed a trip outside, an event ever so rare.

Though calling it a “trip” may be an exaggeration, for all she’s doing is visiting the castle gardens. Spreading out an off-white mat on the ground, laying out the usual afternoon snacks atop it, and it’s basically a picnic.

Even so, Master Attendant was overjoyed and seemed much livelier than usual.

“Master Attendant~ Won’t you try my handmade pastries, it’s filled with a magical girl’s healing powers~”

I retrieved a cheese pastry from the picnic basket and offered it to Master Attendant, eyes focused on her, brimming with anticipation, my tail wagging behind me.

“Being paid so much attention by a magical girl, I’m sure I’ll be cured soon.”

Master Attendant picked up the pastry, smiling wide, echoing my usual mantra, as if she truly believes it’s enough to cure her.

“Your Highness, may we join your picnic~”

“Of course. Take a seat, Pizza, Cassata.”

The ever-punctual daily visitor Pizza appeared, as expected.

However, this time he had company.

The newcomer is Cassata, a Food Soul the King picked up on a trip to the church.

Pizza handed Master Attendant a daisy the same shade as her hair, and sat down beside us.

Cassata, however, kept his distance and remained standing.

“Woah, this pastry is so thick and unevenly shaped, looks so weird.”

“Rude Pizza! I baked it!”

“Hahaha! No wonder, bottoms up~”

“Hold up! You can’t just eat it like that, it’ll taste much better with this sauce~”

“Eh? For real?”

“For real! Master Attendant can root for me.”

Seeing the doubtful Pizza, I winked at Cassata, who has been standing aside perfectly silent all this while.

I’m not as close with Cassata as with Pizza.

Though not for lack of trying, rather I don’t know how to strike up a conversation with him, and his reactions are always so lackluster.

It’s as if I can’t close the distance between us no matter how hard I try.

I’m just not sure how to get along with him.

Though, I find that we’ve come to an agreement regarding messing with Pizza.

Cassata received my signal and pointed at the half-eaten pastry in Master Attendant’s hands.

“Could it be you’re doubting Her Highness, the Princess?”

“... Alright.”

Master Attendant tilted her head and coughed, not saying a word.

Seeing the lack of dissent from Master Attendant, and somewhat concerned over her cough, he inquired no further.

He smeared the chili sauce I prepared over the pastry and took a big bite.

“——HOT!! CHEESE!!! CASSATA!!!!!”

Cassata immediately handed Pizza a glass of water. Grinning eyes filled with tears glanced towards the hysterical me, his face so red from holding back laughter he looked like he was about to pass out.

Master Attendant couldn’t hold back her laughter from this scene anymore, uncontrollable coughs accompanying her giggles.

I wanted to make Master Attendant happy, but seeing her eyes puffing up and reddening, all desire to continue teasing Pizza left me.

Master Attendant… She’s surely in pain right now.

If only… I really had magic capable of healing Master Attendant.

Abandoned

Not long after the picnic, Master Attendant’s condition worsened, and she even started coughing up blood. I dared not leave her side.

The busy King’s visits to her have increased.

The gentle father grasps his daughter's hands, reminiscing their time together in her childhood.

The King occasionally brings up the late Queen as well, but he becomes upset every time, chiding his own inability to fulfill the promise of a healthy life for Master Attendant.

It’s her turn to comfort the King then, telling him to not worry himself too much, that she’ll be fine.

All while I sit on the windowsill, gazing upon the condition of this father and daughter waning day by day, heart filled with just as much worry.

One day, the King arrived in Master Attendant’s room in unexpectedly high spirits.

“I’ve found it! I’ve found a way to cure you!”

“Is that so? Wonderful…”

“Yes.”

“Is it that Vita businessman?”

“Yes, he guaranteed that he’d cure you with his technique!”

Master Attendant has been ill for many years, has tried many techniques, has received many guarantees.

She didn’t have any faith in being cured this time either.

Though, seeing the King in such a good mood, surely Master Attendant is looking forward to it to some extent?

As if responding to the King’s anticipations, Master Attendant’s condition did improve.

She’s now able to go onto the balcony with my help to admire the scenery, a welcome change from the four bland walls of the bedroom.

Even I was convinced now, that this Mr. Vita can truly cure Master Attendant.

Yet good times don’t last, and Master Attendant’s condition worsened again, soon after.

That night, her coughs were more frequent and her throat hoarser than usual.

The blood she coughed up dripped onto her bed, soaking into the velvet.

Then, Master Attendant collapsed.

“Master Attendant! Wait for me Master Attendant! I’m going to look for Mr. Vita right now!”

I dashed out the door, unsure of how to start looking for Mr. Vita.

I’ve never seen this saintly genius, as proclaimed by the King, nor would I know where he would be.

Tears washed into the ground by the downpour, I placed all my bets on the King’s library, yet the guards stopped me from rushing in.

“Your Highness! My King! Don’t stop me! I need to find the King!”

Time is running out, and Master Attendant’s condition is worsening by the minute.

In a last-ditch effort, I screamed at the top of my lungs, hoping it would pierce the thick doors.

“YOUR HIGHNESS! The Princess! She’s coughing up blood!!!”

The tightly shut doors burst open, and the King before me seemed like a totally different person than when I saw him a few months ago. His cheeks sallow and withered, he seemed in even worse condition than Master Attendant.

But the situation didn’t allow me time to ponder it, and I gripped the spears the guards were restraining me with and wailed at the King.

“Please… Please save Master Attendant!!”

His usually serious face twisted into an expression of remorse, immediately giving the order to summon Mr. Vita.

He pats my back, trying to calm me down before I return to Master Attendant’s side, yet I just couldn’t.

As if infected by my emotions, the King gritted his teeth and let out an unfinished thought.

“If only I knew sooner……”

I didn’t know what it meant at the time, fully focused on Master Attendant.

I had only the naive belief that there truly was a cure for Master Attendant’s illness.

Companions

Since that day, Master Attendant has been mostly unconscious.

Even though she occasionally opens her eyes, the time she spent awake gradually lessened.

At Master Attendant’s bedside, I glanced at the empty vase, and my breath hitched.

What’s up with Pizza and Cassata?

She’s so ill, yet they won’t visit her!?

On the contrary, it’s the King who’s constantly by Master Attendant’s side now, awaiting her whenever she wakes from her slumber and is with her until she next falls asleep.

The King’s face is filled with wrinkles, sunken eyes making him seem ever unsightly.

His sallow hands gripped hers tightly, always chanting quietly to himself.

“Don’t leave me, my child, I’ve found a cure, I’m sure you’ll get better.”

“Once Mr. Vita’s prepared everything, you’ll be able to live a healthy life like other kids.”

“Even though we might lose Pizza because of this, I just can’t lose you…”

I was surprised at the King’s words. “We might lose Pizza”? Did something really happen to them?

Suddenly, Master Attendant lurched upwards, coughing uncontrollably.

A large scarlet patch stained the white bedsheets.

The King immediately shoved me aside, hugging Master Attendant tightly.

His sunken eyes revealed an expression of hatred.

“You, all of you, you’re all so useless, one couldn’t protect the princess, the other won’t…”

The King didn’t continue, and I dared not ask for the whereabouts of Pizza and Cassata.

The King now was nothing like the kindly King of months past, as if a curse has settled upon him, causing him to spiral into insanity.

“All my fault…”

“If only I could find a cure sooner… If only… Huh? Why isn’t Mr. Vita here yet?”

“Didn’t he say it’d end today? Could it be Pizza’s fault?! Yes! Surely, surely it’s because he wasn’t cooperating…”

The King’s complaints worsened, mouth spewing hateful words all around.

“Father, it’s not Pizza’s fault, nobody’s at fault. You too, you’re the best King in my eyes, the best father… ugh……”

It felt like Master Attendant’s words were a premonition to something.

“That's why, please don’t blame anyone, Father, I hope… ugh… you will remain my kind, gentle father, and keep the gentle smile you always showed me and Mother… my… kind, gentle… father……”

Master Attendant smiled, gazing towards me seated on the ground, my tears flowing uncontrollably.

“Cheese, you have to go with Pizza and Cassata… get along… The days…. I spent with you… I was really happy…”

With a smile, her eyes shut slowly for the very last time.

“No! No! Don’t leave… don’t leave me… please… Open your eyes, my child…”

Unable to accept reality, the King hugged Master Attendant tightly.

Suddenly, the King stood straight up, as if he were possessed.

“I’ll get Mr. Vita here! He’ll have a way, surely, Mr. Vita will save you…”

As soon as the King left, I held Master Attendant’s lifeless body in my arms.

Her features were gentle as ever, the traces of a smile still remaining.

“It’s really gone, I can’t feel that warmth of life anymore.”

Caressing her pale cheeks, I knew, that the contract between us has been severed.

“Master Attendant, did you leave me with happiness?”

The peace brought on by Master Attendant’s passing was soon shattered.

“Quick! Over there!”

Hearing a mess of hurried footsteps outside, I set Master Attendant down on the bed and went out to check.

Only then did I realize that the castle was in a state of chaos.

“What’s going on?”

I questioned a soldier running past.

“Prince Carl’s residence is being attacked, the guards and soldiers are saying the intruders are Pizza and Cassata, they’ve murdered the King and are escaping the grounds right now. Just in case, please keep yourself and the Princess indoors.”

The soldier’s words sounded damned to me.

Murdered the King?!

Impossible! How could Pizza have killed the King?

And why are they at Prince Carl’s residence?

It was unimaginable, just what happened in this span of time?

I still didn’t have the reasons behind the King cursing Pizza either.

What should I do?

I looked everywhere I could think of, yet I still couldn’t find Pizza and Cassata.

Returning, I brought with me a daisy I found, placing it by Master Attendant’s bed.

I’ll be by Master Attendant’s side, this was meant to be.

Yet for some reason, when I glanced upon that daisy, I couldn’t help but recall Pizza’s silly smile.

“Cheese, you have to go with Pizza and Cassata… get along… The days…. I spent with you… I was really happy…”

Master Attendant’s words repeated over and over in my heart.

Suddenly, I remembered a secret tunnel outside I took with them.

That was the only way for me to get outside, always having to be by Master Attendant’s side.

It was also the last hiding spot I could think of.

With that, I bid Master Attendant farewell and ran out once again.

I couldn’t just sit by idly while they were in trouble. I had to find them, and ask them what exactly had happened to this kingdom?

And what happened to them?

I have faith in them and believe that they’ll be safe. No matter what, I will share their burden.

Because we’ve been best friends since the start!

Cheese

Cheese’s Master Attendant was the Princess of a kingdom, with long locks of golden hair the color of cheese along with beautiful features, yet did not receive the favor of the gods.

After the sickly Queen gave birth to the Princess, she died of anemia.

Yet even born through great effort, the Princess inherited the weak physique of her mother. Her body was always feeble, and the King even thought she’d perish at a young age for a time.

And so the King doted on the Princess, giving her his all.

Unable to accompany her due to his busy schedule, the King decided to have Food Souls be her companions.

Thankfully, even though the Princess was physically weak, she had the soul power potential to be a Master Attendant.

And thus, Cheese came into this world.

At the first sight of this adorable girl with big twitching ears, the Princess reached out her hand happily.

“Will you be my friend, Cheese?”

“Only if you’ll play with me, Master Attendant~”

Of course, Cheese understood that the sickly Princess couldn’t always play with her.

But since they were friends, that didn’t matter as she could be with the Princess.

The King’s Food Soul Pizza would visit often too to tell them about the outside world.

Cheese felt that this was a delightful lifestyle.

Then came another Food Soul, named Cassata.

Perhaps it’s due to him, that the Princess could feel reassured letting Cheese venture into the outside world with Pizza and have all the fun she wanted to.

Every time she went outside, she’d bring souvenirs back to the Princess, along with stories about the people and happenings outside.

From the trio’s adventures together to the misadventures of Pizza, Cheese would recount everything in complete detail, and the Princess was always delighted to hear about it.

Cheese always assumed that her, the Princess, Pizza, and Cassata would always live together happily.

When the Princess was cured, they could secretly sneak her out too, and even tour other countries together.

Yet the gods disproved, and the Princess’ condition deteriorated, all the King’s efforts in vain.

In a stroke of luck, the King heard of a man who claimed he’d be able to cure the Princess.

Who would’ve thought that this was the root of it all.

Pizza and Cassata’s mysterious disappearance, the King turning into a stranger.

The day the Princess departed, was the day it all began.

In an aristocratic revolution, the King ended himself over the pain of losing his daughter and the agony of being betrayed by his younger brother.

And so the castle descended into chaos.

In an effort to save their own skin, the nobles shifted all blame to the King’s most trusted Food Souls.

That is, the wanted criminals of guards and soldiers everywhere: Pizza and Cassata.

Due to the Princess’ words to her, Cheese steeled her resolve and left the Princess’ quarters.

She arrived at the secret tunnel, a discovery during a game of hide and seek, unbeknownst to anyone else in the castle.

Later, this became Cheese, Pizza and Cassata’s rendezvous point to the outside.

A secret shared by just the three of them, and Cheese’s only hope.

In the deafening silence of the tunnel, the dark surroundings pushed the girl to her limits.

Her Master Attendant has left her, will her only remaining companions leave her too?

At that thought, she curled up tight, only the sounds of her sobs echoing through the darkness.

After some time, she finally heard a familiar voice.

“Cheese?”

“Pizza?! Cassata!”

Lifting her head, Cheese saw Pizza’s pale face and Cassata’s, dripping with blood.

Not even leaving time to rejoice their reunion, Cheese’s face was already covered in tears.

“You, what’s with the two of you!?”

“Cheese, don’t… don’t cry…”

“Who’s crying! I’d never cry for the likes of you!”

Cheese dried her tears stubbornly.

“Cassata, why are you injured so badly? Are you alright?”

“I’m alright, it looks worse than it is, it’ll heal soon. I just got into a little accident~ Hehe…”

“Were you really at Prince Carl’s residence? And about the King…”

“We…”

Cassata stopped, looking pointedly at the silent Pizza.

“Where the hell did you two go!? The King and Master Attendant, they’re both… dead…”

Pizza remained speechless, he knew Cheese wasn’t kidding, his contract with the King had been severed.

Cassata looked at the distressed Pizza, rubbed Cheese on the head gently, and replied.

“We were at the wrong place at the wrong time, we intruded by mistake. My injuries are due to that too.”

“For real?”

“We didn’t kill the King, believe us.”

Hearing this, Cheese finally relaxed, the dam of her tears breaking down, and cried heartily against Pizza.

Details can come after a good bawling.

Knowing Cheese, Pizza didn’t give her a chance to blurt out her questions, instead immediately asking his once she'd calmed down slightly.

“Why are you here?”

“The Pr… The Princess told me to look for you.”

“What should we do now, Cassata?”

“Let’s leave this place.”

“Leave?!”

“I think, there’s no place for us here anymore…”

“Then, as we’d planned, let’s go on an adventure! Cheese?”

“I… want to go with you.”

As Pizza and Cassata’s eyes met, they filled each other with determination.

Pizza pat Cheese on the back, wiping away her tears.

“Don’t cry anymore, Cheese, let’s move on!”

Cheese wanted to speak, but words got caught in her throat as she heard Pizza proclaim, only managing to nod furiously.

No matter what, she didn’t want the two before her to leave her.

Pizza and Cassata were the only friends she had left.

[amberenigma]

05: in which a local lizard struggles to understand the difference between friendly people and actual customs

The sea breeze tickles his nose--but it’s not nearly as chilling as the mountain ranges from home. Limsa seems to be much more warmer--perhaps in general, or perhaps because he had grown used to the sun, and being above land ( still, that didn’t really hide the sunburn on his cheeks ). The plaza bustles with adventurers, sailors, Maelstrom officers. 

Overall, it’s pleasant ( at least to the blatant foreigner ). He hasn’t really seen any of his clan around--although, it’d make sense. Raen stayed together lest they voluntarily jump from the nest, much like he. Still, the Arcanist’s guild gave him a home, and the Drowning Wench wasn’t a half-bad place to eat some pub food.

Still, there’s the notion of being lost--far from home, and surrounded by kinds of people he’d never seen until stepping foot on the docks below.

( it’s hard to tell what i can and cannot do.. )

Despite himself, at least he can rely on favors--small errands to pull in some gil. At least while he begins to embrace the notion of magic, not unlike his neighboring Kojin, he could begin to network with the locals of La Noscea..

“---Whaa.. Wow..!!”

The voice is bright, genuinely curious. Ovan made the mistake of looking around at eye level before setting his gaze halfway down. Who..

“Can I..help you?” the raen asks, albeit confused as to why some complete stranger felt the need to completely scrutinize his height like a marble statue.

The seeker brings summer with her smile, her hands clasping together at the joy of being acknowledged. She’s tiny, but her snow white locks are comfortably tied back, giving a slight bounce to her silhouette. It’s difficult to gauge her age--an observation he picked up when he came overseas. If she’s running around the city-state on her own, though, she’s probably only a couple years younger than he. Still, it’s vaguely comforting seeing such a friendly face--even if it was totally unprompted.

“Yeah! Here, I have something for you,” she beams, rummaging her pouch for a thin, tiny knapsack of what seemed to be food, soon thrusting it out to him. There was no room to deny her charity. “Call me Kenji, by the way! You’re so tall, I had to come say ‘Hi!’”

“Ah.. I’m not sure if I should be thankful or not..” Ovan falters slightly--mostly because he’s never been accustomed to someone being so upfront. He takes the knapsack, peering inside and pulling out a cookie in the shape of..well, something. There’s a face.. a dress.. some triangles for legs.. and pointed ears on either side of what supposed to be a head. The top looks something like leaves. All of which are slightly browned along the edges, so not entirely perfect, but edible nonetheless. Kenji must have caught the clear confusion, because Ovan can hear a bubble of laughter from below.

“Those are ginger cookies. Have you never seen a sylph before?”

Two blinks--a what? A sprite, she means? Maybe it’s a regional thing.. he was still struggling to pick up on Eorzean-specific words. “Never. I come from the Far East, as Eorzeans put it.”

Her eyes gleam in open interest. “Really?! No wonder I’ve never seen someone like you! I’m from Gridania, believe it or not, hehe,” Kenji hums rather proudly, temporarily on her toes as if to get a better look at his strangely reptilian features. Perhaps sylphs weren’t local to La Noscea.. Against his better judgement, the raen takes a bite out of the cookie, audibly surprised at the spark of spice. For once, it might have been the most familiar thing he’s had since he’s come here.

“I like giving cookies to all of my friends,” the seeker continues proudly, a clawed hand closing on her chest to boot, “When you bake all the time, you have lots of extras to give out to people. Besides, you and I are friends now!”

“--H-Huh--” Friends? Were Eorzeans like this..? Did they just give out food by custom? The merchants sure didn’t act like that.. ( what in the twelve did i get myself into.. ) With a toothy grin, the seeker reaches up as far as she can ( she can only get as far as the hood of his arcanist robes ) and pats him happily on his shoulder before overextending to press a finger against his nose. Both of which, unsurprisingly, leaves him both shocked and confused. “You’re weird, you know that? But then again, so am I,” Kenji giggles openly, amused, but as far as Ovan can tell, genuinely excited. 

Sheepishly, a large hand comes to rub the back of his neck along smooth scales in a nervous tic. “I haven’t been here very long,” Ovan admits, “so a lot of traditions simply go over my head. I’m still learning.”

“Traditions?” she parrots, soon realizing his assumptions about her offer to treats. A bellow of laughter soon follows, much to Ovan’s chagrin. “No, no! That’s just how I meet new people is all. Some people aren’t that friendly. But it’s like that everywhere. Here! Let me show you around!”

Another offer he wasn’t allow to refuse, as Kenji had already begun tugging him by the sleeve. Not that he’d been here for a month already.

[mytoplipkink-blog]

DRABBLE GAME! First writing challenge!

HEY GUYS! Since I just started my blog and posted my first wonho shot, I wanna get to writing a bit more. Like this, you can get to know a bit more about me and my writing style.

I am writing longer stuff at the moment, but before I post them (since they take a few days to get ready) let’s play a smol lil game hehe! I found these prompts on this prompt blog. Props to them, thank you so much for the inspo!

HOW TO PLAY: Send me an ask, giving me one of these numbers, and a member from a group. I’ll do my best to write a small drabble, a few hundreds words, based on the number and the member you gave me. I think it’ll be fun!

Groups I feel comfortable writing about: Monsta X, BTS, Seventeen, Winner, Shinee, GOT7, blackpink.

If you want a member for another group, feel free to ask, i’ll see what I can do! I am familiar with many groups. I just may not know their personnalities that much, which makes it harder to write about them. I’ll try my best though. x

Ready, set, go!!! 

“The skirt is supposed to be this short.”

“How long have you been standing there?”

“I may be an idiot, but I’m not stupid.”

“Who gave you that black eye?”

“You haven’t even touched your food. What’s going on?”

“I just like proving you wrong.”

“Everyone keeps telling me you’re the bad guy.”

“Forget it. You fucking suck.”

“Quit it or I’ll bite.”

“If you use up all the hot water again, I swear to god! You’re on the couch for a month!!”

“If I die, I’m going to haunt your ass.”

“I’m pregnant.”

“Looks like we’re gonna be stuck here for a while.”

“Take. It. Off.”

“Well, you’re coming home with me whether you like it or not.”

“I’ll kick his ass if you want me to.”

“Stop it! It tickles!”

“It’s okay to cry…”

“And that’s how you ruin a life. Congratulations.”

“D..did you just make that noise?”

“He’s a bad kisser.”

“You can scream if you want.”

“I didn’t know we were keeping track.”

“We’re playing checkers. If you don’t like it, leave.”

“One of them’s missing.”

“Save some for me.”

“Oh, fuck off.”

“You’re still mad?”

“Come over here and make me.”

“You better watch yourself.”

“Eat your lunch and you wouldn’t be hungry.”

“Why did we have to have kids?”

“Call on Line 1”

“He creeped me out. I’m not gonna lie.”

“I’m done! You can fix it!”

“Can we just watch a movie and fall asleep on the couch?”

“Where did he go?”

“You leave whenever you feel like it.”

“I forgot I was a single parent.”

“Don’t apologize if you don’t mean it.”

“You’re going out dressed like that?”

“For the hundredth time, I’m not your babysitter.”  

“Frost the damn cupcakes.”

“Well that’s the second biggest news I’ve heard all day.”

“You look pretty hot in plaid.”  

“I thought you were dead!”

“I thought it was a one-night-stand…and now we’re married…”

“We’ve become the clingy couple that you used to complain about.”

“Quit touching me. Your feet are cold.”

“You know you want it, sweetheart.”

“I’m your husband. It’s my job.”  

“You just wanted them because the light up.”

“That wasn’t very subtle.”

“He thinks he’s a mind reader.”  

“It’s just you and me tonight. I was thinking we could have a little fun.”

“I don’t do hugs.”

“Don’t talk anymore.”

“I’m just a guy with a wife, two kids, and a Harley.”

“How do I even put up with you?”

“I said get rid of it.”

“They didn’t just find out. They already knew!”

“You’re not as quiet as you think you are.”

“Can you just man up and change his diaper?”

“Just don’t buy a goat. I don’t care what you do, just no goats.”

“I have a secret.”

“I won’t let you get hurt.”

“You’re strong, baby. You have to be.”

“He’s four years old!!”

“I’ve had enough! I want to be alone!”

“I can’t stand seeing you like this.”

“Me and the boys will handle it.”

“You’re competitive and so am I, and it’s going to lead to a fight.”

“Is there a reason you’re naked in my bed?”

“You’re a dork, just like your father.”

“Mind if I join you?”

“Daddy!”

“I lost our child.”

“That’s my shirt. So is that..wait?”

“My name isn’t Leslie…who’s Leslie?”

“There’s a surprise upstairs for you.”

“I’ll take care of it.”

“I’m not your boss? Well then who is?”

“You can’t eat solids, only liquids until Thursday.”

“Come on, baby, up to bed.”

“They got you a present. Isn’t it sweet?”

“Am I scaring you?”

“Run! You said you’d work out with me!”

“After everything…I’d still choose you.”

“And when did you plan on telling me about this?”

“Trust me.”

“Scoot over a little bit, please.”

“You’re so clingy, I love it.”

“You didn’t just wake me up at 2am because you were ‘in the mood’.”

“Did they hurt you?”

“You’re cute when you’re all worried.”

“Stop being grumpy. It’s lame.”

“I don’t need a hero, I need a husband.”

“Don’t shut me out.”

“You got a cute butt.”

“I just got out of the shower, I can’t dance. What if my towel falls off?”

“Don’t be an asshole. Asshole.”

“Do you really think I could ever replace you?”

“Sharing is caring. Now give me your fries.”

“…or we can chill in our underwear.”

“You can’t make up for it by giving me a tic-tac.”

“Keep pedaling and don’t stop, okay?”

“You, me, popcorn, two liter Dr. Pepper, and a movie. You in?”

“Have you seen my contacts?”

“Life is a highway, and I’m always drunk. So I’m not driving.”

“Quit stalling. Where’s your father?”

“You can’t just hug me and think everything’s okay.”

“Is he coming home?”

“I prefer blondes.”

“No more dogs. How hard it it to understand?”

“I let you win.”

“I broke your nose, and I’m sorry for that. But what you’re doing isn’t fair.”

“Can I do your hair?”

“Your favorite superhero can’t be a villain.”

“I told you not to jump on the bed!”

“He’s pampering me, let him be.”

“Ready or not, here I come.”

“I’m worried about losing my job!”

“Oh, did I scare you, big boy?”

“Happy new year!”

“Quit moving, I’m trying to sleep. Wait…are you…what?!”

“You nap, I’ll stay awake.”

“It’s turbulence. It’s normal.”

“Don’t touch me. We’re fighting.”

“I’ll give you a massage.”

“You fell asleep in the tub?!”

“Are you doodling?”

“We’re not playing strip poker. I don’t care what I said when I was drunk.”

“Slushies aren’t just for kids, fuck society.”

“Are you scared…Then why won’t you look at the screen?”

“Enough with the pillow talk, I’m tired.”

“You had a nightmare, tell me what it was about so I can fix it.”

“We need groceries, not just junk food. You’re worse than the kids.”

“Is this our closet? Or your closet?”

“If I win, you do dishes for a week.”

“Fist bumps are cooler than high-fives…”

“Use your words.”

“Hold my hand so he gets jealous.”

“Ew, your hand is sweaty.”

“Get out of my face before I hit you.”

“I don’t care if your 4 or 40, you don’t hit people.”

“You only care about football, beer, and raking leaves.”

“Look! Fireflies!”

“Why do you only kiss me when I’m sleeping?”

“I just need ten minutes.”

"Just a small kiss.”

THANKS GUYS. x 

- E xx