#he is a gamer he was not built for war someone help him

[nebuegg]

IM SO HAPPY THE MINDVERSE SPINOFF CREATORS DO CROSSOVERS IN THEIR SERIES ARUGHH watching felix's mind and hearing barney say "felix!" in barmey's voice made me jump for joy,,,

[iwillstealyourjawbone]

My fic for the MCYTblr Holiday Exchange! For @hydrobugz, beta'd by the wonderful @blocky-tides

1.

Grian Dreamslayer, Ex-Watcher and Evo Admin, was bored. His executive function had decided that he didn’t need to be productive in the time he had set aside for working. No, instead his useless brain thought that what he really needed was to lie on some chests and let his thoughts run, because that always turned out great. 

He considered going to bother X, but didn’t want to get up from his (uncomfortable but simultaneously the only place he could be without becoming even more restless and despondent) sprawl across one of his several chest monsters. 

He was just dozing off when he was QUITE RUDELY awoken by one ImpulseSV yelling in his ear.

“Grian Grian Grian Grian Grian wake up! Wake up!”

Halfheartedly swatting him away, he rolled over to try to see what was going on, but forgot that he had sprawled on the edge of his chest monster, and fell flat on his face. Onto Impulse’s boots. 0 stars, would not recommend. The laces hurt your face. Grian should make laceless boots, they’d be better to fall on.

“Gri? You gonna move, bud?”

Oh yeah. Impulse. 

“No, I live here now.”

Problem solved. Grian wins. At life. Yeah.

“Grian, I will call Gem. You don’t want to get Gem angry, right? Remember what happened to Etho. You need to build the back of Dwayne. It’s an eyesore, and Scar just built a castle, you can build half a base,” Impulse said, presumably staring down at him with a stern look on his face. 

“Nooooooooooo :(“ Grian whined, pouting. Rolling closer to Impulse so that he laid curled around Impulse’s legs.

“How did you make that sound with your face. Grian. Grian how,” Impulse said, a look of utter horror written across his features. 

“Don’t worry about it!” Grian said, grinning in a way that stretched his void-black eyes just so to strike fear into even a mines-hardened dwarf like Impulse. 

“Grian,” He half-pleaded, half-sighed, a weary look on his face, the look of a man who has seen the Horrors (Grian, sleep deprived).

“:)”

Suffice to say, Grian didn’t have to finish the back of his base, and instead chugged a Slowness potion right after a Weakness to send himself into the closest thing he had to the sweet release of death on a respawn server, sleep. Doing that in the middle of the day had the unfortunate side effect of making him wake up at 3 AM and go for a night walk, terrifying Cub, who just wanted some water.

2.

“Hey Xisuma!” Grian said, sock-sliding into the room where the poor overworked admin was sitting at his desk doing smart-people work.

“What now, Grian,” Xisuma sighed, already anticipating Grian’s antics, spinning around in his gamer chair. (He denied it’s true nature, but Grian and Pearl had gotten it for him in the first place, it was supposed to help with posture, and the description that the seller had given it was ‘Posture Correcting Chair for Gamers’, so there Xisuma)

“Your desk is very messy for someone who works on code, notably not on paper,” Grian said, fully off-topic from what he originally came in to do.

“Why are you of all people here, Grian? Normally you avoid me at all costs until you’ve finished the back of your base, which you haven’t done. So what is your plan here, Gri?” Xisuma said, tenting his fingers like one of those old-timey movie villains.

“You look like that old guy, what's-his-face … DR EVIL! That's it. You look like Dr Evil. You know, from the movies?” Grian clapped his hands in a satisfied manner at having figured that out. “Anyways, I was wondering for no particular reason if you knew how to sew or weave anything, just for funsies.” Grian tried to look innocent, but Xisuma had seen him in the midst of prank wars several times too often to be fooled, and had to clean up his messes far too many times. 

“Grian, go build your base. I can tell from experience when you are hiding something or trying to get out of doing something, and right now, I see both. Stop procrastinating.” Xisuma said sternly, turning back to his Very Important Server Business and leaving Grian to find his way out of his base. 

“Fine, I’ll just ask Pearl, I didn’t need you anyways, Ixay-Soomay-Vhoyad. Harrumph.” Grian muttered, standing there for a few moments waiting for Xisuma to change his mind. When Xisuma didn’t, Grian turned around, striding out of the base, arms crossed and nose scrunched up angrily.

3.

Grian shot off a rocket to propel himself over Decked Out 2, taking a moment to admire just how much effort had gone and was still going into it. He waved to Tango, who was working on the exterior of the base, doing a loop-de-loop in the air as the blazeborne smiled up at him, then continued on his journey to the lands of Soup, also known as Gem, Impulse, and Pearl’s bases. 

A few minutes later, he alighted atop the great alien fungus that one PearlescentMoon called home, and (after sneezing a few times, alien pollen apparently still triggers allergies) began trying to get his friend to snap out of her building focus. 

“PEARL HELP!”

That should do the trick.

Sure enough, a second later he spotted her take off from her workplace on some rocks, and fly towards him.

“Grian, what? What’s happening? Why did you yell? Are you okay?” She said, landing next to him with her sword out, scanning the area for any danger.

“I didn’t want to walk around looking for you, your base is too big!” He said, bouncing over and bumping his head against her shoulder affectionately.

“Grina, you scared me, jeez. You are such a nugget.” She chided, putting her sword away and slumping.

“Sorry… anyways, do you know where I can acquire a bolt of fabric large enough to cover an area the size of the back of a base, for reasons of shenanigans?” Grian asked.

“Oooo, what shenanigans? I want in!” Pearl replied, excited with the prospect of a reprieve from her work.

Grian hesitated. Pearl was one of the most dedicated builders on the server, and he knew from personal experience that she was more than capable of knocking some sense into him if she thought he needed it. 

Pearl gave him a knowing look, “You’re procrastinating.”

It wasn’t a question.

“My base,” Grian sighed. The cat was out of the bag, he might as well go all in. 

“Gri, I’m not going to lecture you, because I know you know what I’m going to say, and when Xisuma gets on your tail about it you’re going to hear the unabridged version whether you like it or not. Now, all that said, what were you planning on doing with those large amounts of fabric?”

“I was going to fashion it up into a cape to cover the back of my base and call it finished,” Grian said, slightly sheepish but knowing that Pearl would find the idea hilarious. 

Sure enough, Pearl bonked her head against his and let out a laugh, “Gri! Oh, that’s amazing.”

He was about to ask if she would help him even still when she grabbed his arm and started dragging him over to her giant mushroom house.

“C’mon Grian! We’re having SOUP!” 

4.

[JoeHills] hey grian, are you available to help me get wood? behind cleo’s base

[Grian] sure! omw

Grian rocketed through the Nether tunnels, beautifully built by Tango and his helpers,  and one of the best ways to get around. As he came up on Cleo’s portal, he sent a quick message to Joe.

[Grian] @ cleo’s portal

[Grian] almost there

Shaking off the vertigo that always accompanied going though Nether Portals, he emerged into the daylight, only to be met with a stern looking XisumaVoid and one JoeHills standing behind him, looking slightly ashamed.

“Sorry, Grian! He made me do it.” Joe said, running back to his base. 

“Grian,” Xisuma stated. “You can’t put it off forever, the season’s almost over. You and I both know it will haunt you forever if you don’t finish before we leave.”

He was right, however much Grian didn’t want to admit it. 

“I know, but ‘Suma-” 

“No ‘buts’, Grian!”

Hehe. Butts.

“Fine, I’ll go try and get some work done, but you know how it is. No guarantees, never guarantees.” He said, all the defiance seeping out of him and leaving a quiet tiredness behind.

“That’s all I can ask for, Grian.”

“Do you have chocolate to give me in exchange?” Grian asked, not expecting anything to come of it but still wanting to try.

“I have chocolate!” Cleo said from around the corner, having apparently been there the whole time.

“Give please,” Grian said, making grabby hands towards her, moving on quickly from her eavesdropping and leaving the bad vibes behind, he didn’t need that in his life. 

The chocolate was very good, it was the fancy dark chocolate that melted on your tongue and that Grian would kill and die for. 

“Cleo, we’ve talked about this! Listening to other people’s conversations is not okay.” Xisuma said, not over the negativity. He needed some crystals, Grian had heard somewhere that citrine might be good for calming? He wasn’t sure. It helped with something!

“Chocolate?” Cleo asked, ignoring Xisuma, he wasn’t the boss of her. Snapping off a piece, she handed it to the admin.

“Are you trying to bribe me?” Xisuma asked incredulously.

“Is it working?”

In the commotion of an increasingly weary Xisuma trying to impart some life lessons onto Cleo, Grian managed to slip away and headed back to his base to ‘work on his base’ (aka go find Jellie for some stress relief).

+1

Grian rolled over in his bed, groaning as the sunlight hit his eyes. He usually had the curtains closed, that’s weird.

“Grian! Wake up!” Gem exclaimed.

Why was Gem here?

“All the Hermits are here! We’re going to help you build your base!”

Okay then.

Wait. What? His base?

“Pearl, X, and Joe helped arrange it! It’s our Hermits Helping Hermits project this week.”

That makes sense. 

Gem ran outside, and Grian followed somewhat bemusedly and still tired from being abruptly woken up. As he stepped out onto his scaffolding, he stopped dead in his tracks. 

All the Hermits were there. Gem wasn’t kidding. Cub and Cleo seemed to be competing over who could place trapdoors the fastest, while Joe fueled both the argument from the sidelines working in a crafting table where he was rapidly filling double chests with materials. 

To their right, Impulse, Etho, and Tango were laughing while Bdubs squawked indignantly, most likely the (lighthearted) butt of a joke.

Directly beneath them were Mumbo and Scar, who seemed to have gotten distracted, with Mumbo looking over Scar’s prosthetic supports for his back and legs while Scar waved his hands as he did when he was off on a tangent. Even from a distance, Grian could hear the words ‘Stormtroopers’ and ‘rides’, so he could make an educated guess that he was talking about Scar’s recurring hyperfixation, Disneyland.

The other Hermits were scattered around, all laughing and chatting and working on parts of the base.

He was snapped back to the present by Xisuma and Pearl landing right in front of him and Gem. Pearl beaming and Xisuma’s body language conveying happiness too, albeit a little more reserved.

“Pearl, ‘Suma, this is amazing! I- You- Why-. I have no words.”

Not knowing how to articulate the unabashed joy he felt at all his friends coming together to help him, he surged forward and enveloped them both in a hug. 

He stayed there, trying to regain his composure, for longer than he would like to admit, but eventually he pulled away.

“C’mon, nobody’s working on the roofs yet!”

[lasnevadaslaborunion]

Back to frothing at the mouth about Foolish's dynamic with Quackity, and how recruiting this man was both the worst and best choice Quackity ever made

As of the Las Nevadas arc, Quackity had fully embraced the cycle of violence. He's a mess of a human being, held together only by his victim complex and his desperation to never be forgotten or left behind again. Where once he was deeply empathetic and diplomatic, he's now become vengeful, hurtful, manipulative, uncaring. He no longer believes that people are capable of goodness, let alone redemption.

And yet, here stands Foolish Gamers.

Once an avatar of death itself, now a totem of undying. Once a thoughtless destroyer, now a benevolent creator. Once a warrior who would raze entire village to the ground, now someone who happily builds homes for the ones he loves. Once a villain, now the kind of hero that many thought was extinct.

Quackity watched and waited, allowed Foolish to be brutally murdered. He told him to his face that everything he built, all his healthy ways of coping with his past, were worthless and ineffectual. He expected that his cynical philosophy would be proven right, and that death and trauma and humiliation would break this good man the same way it once broke him.

But it didn't break him. Foolish was rattled, to be sure, but he nonetheless continued being the kind-hearted and helpful person he was before death. He even went so far as to give Quackity - the man who wouldn't rescue him - his own netherite armor.

It's an astonishing but often overlooked moment, and Quackity's reaction speaks volumes about both characters. He appears genuinely touched by the gesture. He asks why Foolish is being so nice to him, when he treated him so cruelly. He has devoted so much of himself to the "eye for an eye" mentality that this sort of indiscriminate kindness has become alien to him. Foolish responds that maybe Quackity had a point and that his actions might have taught him a well-needed lesson, but you can hear the hesitation in his voice. The very circumstances they're in contradict the message Quackity wanted to send. And when Quackity spiraled to his lowest point yet, lost his best friend to the consequences of his own actions, and discovered the senseless harm that war and revenge truly caused, Foolish was right there at his side to help him up again.

Now, after ages of fearing his newly-discovered mortality, ages of questioning his place and his role in the world, what did Foolish do to finally gain immortality?

He constructed a giant statue of another god, one of the most impressive and breathtaking builds the server has ever seen.

Foolish achieved his full potential not through violence, not through destruction, but through his gift of creation. Quackity didn't teach him that lesson. He actively tried to stamp it out. But perhaps all along, Foolish was the one who should have been teaching him.

And isn't that the calling of a Totem of Undying: to show people another chance at life?

[unholyeverything]

Why I think Lucifer and Diavolo do trust each other.

And are in love.

It’s just that there is quiet a big post going around now where people hate on the ship and put that in the dialuci tag. And tbh. Just don’t tag that if you don’t like it, don’t engage with it. 

But I wanted to add my own thoughts into the discussion. Because people tend to interpret canon scenes subjectively, how they want to reprieve something, they put more thought into something, more than what’s actually there. Like when you like it, you interpret it in that way, if you don’t you interpret it in this way. That’s normal, anybody is free to do that, just leave the people alone that do otherwise. Watch your own plate as I like to say! Tagging these type of things in the ship tags is just typical: I’m trying to pick senseless fights type of behavior!

One of the biggest arguments as to why this relationship is thought off as toxic by some people it that Diavolo forced him into a pact with his sister’s death. But did he really? Or was that a pro gamer move to actually get his trust and respect?

The pact that Diavolo offered was the life of Lilith for Lucifer’s eternal loyalty, right? Again, was it forced. Or did he have an option to decline?

Here is what I think about that: Lucifer does not trust Diavolo when they first met in the Devildom when he still was an angel. [There is a Devilgram about this.]   It is clearly stated that the angels have some prejudices and just think demons are all in general bad and untrustworthy.

He still had that mindset when he first ended up there. The war happened in heaven, he never really had contact with demons outside of that to get to know them personally and to start thinking about them differently!

So do you really think he would have accepted Dia’s help, that would come from the goodness of his heart, that he didn't believe was there? 

No, he wouldn't. So Diavolo thought about something that he could already offer him as a trade for his sisters life. Because Lucifer wouldn't have accepted, his Pride would not let him accept any help without giving something back. And Dia already knew that, or at least he seems intelligent enough to me to reprieve things like that. He knows about Lucifer's personality, they met before!

Also Dia couldn’t have asked for something of little value to Lucifer. Because it was his sister they were talking about, something he deemed very important, not worth trading for a small favour. Dia couldn't just ask him to trade a life with having him wash his feet once or something. He also wouldn't have accept that. 

It needed to be something that he thought of as equal value as his sister, that's why Diavolo came up with asking for his eternal loyalty.

And that is what I think actually made Lucifer trust him. He has his cards layed out in front of him. He didn't have to fear that Diavolo would ask of something for it later. Because he trusted demons so little so that's what I think was what he was afraid of. Repercussion. Having to do something he didn't want to. Having something someone could blackmail him with. Having something the future King of hell could hold against him. He was told right from the start what he wanted from him and he could accept or not.

That's how Dia actually built trust with him. By also letting him know that he didn’t take this lightheartedly. That this was serious for him as well. Nothing to make jokes about, nothing to just brush over and forget, nothing that could be made up for with a simple one time order. It needed to be something that the strongest and most proud of all archangels accepted as equal value as his dearest sister.

And honestly I'm also not letting the argument count that Lucifer wants a purely professional relationship with him. There is enough evidence that that isn't the case.

Diavolo is head over heals for him and never stops praising him whenever he speaks of him, and not just about his work. He states multiple times how divine he is, that is not something that is just geared towards looks, it can mean personality and the person as a whole too. 

Would you ask your Boss to go to a fast food place with you? If you were purely professional? Because in the chat it clearly states that it was Lucifer that planned this, they just couldn’t do it together because of work.

Diavolo says that Lucifer is his only friend. He is the only one that can make him beg, he goes out of his way to spend time with him outside of work.

SPOILER, SKIP THE NEXT PART:

During the newer lessons, the scene where Diavolo just leaves with Solomon instead of Lucifer. Lucifer tries everything in his knowledge to find out what Diavolo did or wants to do. He even asks Mammon for help. He feels betrayed. There can’t be any betrayal without there being trust beforehand. 

SPOILER END.

Sure his brothers tease him for doing everything he tells him to. But honestly. That could just be siblings teasing each other. He clearly goes against him when his siblings are involved. And Diavolo listens and respects his opinion. He also wouldn’t do that if he just wanted a slave.

And him not admitting to that, or trying to push him off is just a combination of his personality and pride in my opinion. He can't be proud of himself or live out his sin as much as his other brothers do, since he has to listen to orders, and has to work for others, which is pretty much the opposite of what the avatar of Pride is about. So he projects it onto Diavolo and tries his hardest to make sure everyone is proud of him and what he achieved. He is proud of him, and holds Diavolo as his projection of his pride. He is the one everyone should look up to. He is showing off not with what he achieved, but with what Diavolo achieved. He puts his opinion as high as he should actually put his own if he truly was the personification of pride! 

And it will be Lucifer's pride that will make sure everything goes as perfectly as possible.

[sm-pantheon]

SMPantheon AU Information

Greetings, Tumblrer. Can I interest you in my Dream SMP God AU? Yes? Great. Hope you like reading.

I should clarify, before we begin, that there is one rule in the Pantheon: and that is not to date those in other classes. This rule is often broken due to the enforcer's blatant biases, so some people get off scott-free. This rule doesn't apply to dating humans, however, because of the need for classic zeus-style, demigod-bearing hijinks.

THE TRINITY

The creators of the universe, the dreamons. Gods of Chaos. Two have been replaced so far.

Dream XD The creator, the father, the man...god...thing Himself. Yes, that H is capitalized. He was the first god to exist, and every heavenly being stems from Him in some way. He enjoys seeing people suffer. He loves George in secret, even if He hasn't yet reciprocated. He stripped Captain Puffy of some of her power because He deemed the God of Order to be getting in the way of His chaos. His mask has the XD emoticon on it, fittingly enough.

Dream The 'son' of the Trinity, and the enforcer of the love law. His position was once filled by Mexican Dream, before he was demoted for being a dumbass. He later demoted Mamacita for falling in love with Mexican Dream, because they weren't in the same God class anymore. He is notoriously biased and nepotistic with his enforcing. He's also an asshole. His mask has the :) emoticon on it.

Drista The 'holy spirit' of the Trinity. A child. She causes chaos wherever she goes, whether intentionally or not, which makes DXD very proud. Her position was once filled by Mamacita, before she was demoted. She often hangs out with the demigods, most often Tommy. Wherever she goes, hijinks ensue. He mask has the >;P emoticon on it.

GREATER GODS

The most powerful gods, besides the Trinity.

Philza The God of Freedom. A ruthless killer, but a pretty good father figure. He was the first non-Trinity god, and appropriately he matches up with their chaos. He is most notably the god who invented angels, and personally made the first one, Clara. A long time ago he fought with Awesamdude because of their conflicting symbols and won, demoting Sam to the rank of a regular God. His wife is Kristin, a (dead) human, but one time he had a fling with a refridgerator. Confusing times. His sons are Tommy, Tubbo, and Wilbur, and his grandson is Fundy.

Technoblade The God of Violence, often regarded as the 'Blood God'. He is a force to be reckoned with, and you can probably trace him back to every world war in some way. He has a more stoic and calm side, which only Philza and his family can bring out. He acts as sort of an uncle and brother to them, sometimes caring for the kids. He would rather die than have his own, though. He feels an attachment to his friend Ranboo's son, Michael, because they are both pigmen. He plans to train him when he grows hold enough. His pride and joy is the section of the underworld he invented, which is the section where sinners burn eternally.

Antfrost The God of Love. Currently he is taking refuge on earth with his boyfriend Velvet, who is the third archangel. He's never been very friendly with Dream, so it would be inevitable that he would be punished for loving Velvet. To avoid this, he fleed to a small town on earth. He has had a long-time rivalry with Ponk because of his innate hatred of cats.

Foolish Gamers The God of Creation. He is a master builder, and has built the temples of all the Gods. One day, Sapnap, the God of Destruction, challenged him to a fight, and whoever lost would be demoted. He accepted and won, which is why his equal is now lower on the totem pole than he is. He created the earth with Hannah at the command of the Trinity. His best friend is Eret. He often enlists the help of the rock nymph HBomb for help with terraforming and foundation building.

Karl Jacobs The God of Time. He can control time by slowing it down, speeding it up, pausing it, rewinding, etc. However, he is only allowed to use it when the Trinity gives permission. Usually, he just sits around and helps his "not fiancés", Quackity and Sapnap, with their work. He was born soon after Philza.

GODS

Averagely powerful gods.

Sapnap The God of Destruction. He was originally a greater god, but lost a fight to Foolish and gave some power up as a result. He is responsible in part for all the natural disasters of the world.

Awesamdude He was stripped of some of his power by Philza (with assistance from Techno, although he'd never admit it). He acts as a father figure to some of the younger heavenly beings. He created Sam Nook, an altered clone of himself, to be a Nanny for Philza's children. He now takes care of young Fundy and Michael. Loves Ponk in secret.

Badboyhalo The God of Purity. Cannot do wrong, after all he is the only person who actually is dating someone and is following the rule. Has a public record stating he has never sworn. He's highly devoted to his pursuit of holiness... and also Skeppy.

Skeppy The God of Fortune. After all, he's made of diamond. He's a goofball, especially around Bad. He's Bad's best friend/boy friend, B.B.F., as he would say!

Captain Puffy The God of Order. She has always had a rivalry with the Trinity for directly contradicting them with her existence. Because of this, her dates with Niki have to remain a secret, or else she'll be demoted again. Currently she's filling the paws of Antfrost as God of Love until he comes back, or a new heir is born.

Hannahxxrose The God of Nature. She mostly hangs out on Earth, tending to gardens worldwide, but she stays in heaven an ample amount too. She was literally born from Foolish's idea to create nature for earth, which she then assisted in plans for.

JSchlatt The God of Sin. He was originally a Greater God, but he had to be demoted so that the human race wouldn't be absolutely fucked. He's technically in charge of the Underworld, but he doesn't do jack shit down there. He's a raging alcoholic, and is always complaining about heart problems. His best friend is Minx.

Eret The God of Power. He isn't part nymph or anything, but the nymphs respect him and have crowned him as their king. He gladly accepts this role. His best friend is Foolish.

MINIGODS

Less powerful gods.

GeorgeNotFound The God of Beauty. He is fully aware that DXD is in love with him, but he doesn't want to reciprocate for fear of the rule. Still, he hasn't ratted him out... yet. He often hangs out with Sapnap, and he used to hang out with Dream, but he has become more distant as of late.

Mamacita The God of Justice. Also known as Girl Dream. She was removed from the Trinity for loving Mexican Dream after he was demoted. Since she and him still have a lot of power, they've been tasked with running the Underworld. Her mask has the :/ emoticon on it.

Mexican Dream The God of Death. Was removed from the Trinity for generally being a dumbass. He co-runs the Underworld with his Mamacita. He has also adopted Quackity as a twin. His mask has the ;] emoticon on it.

Quackity The God of Humor. He doesn't do a whole lot, just hangs out with his fiancés and his unofficial twin. An absolute jokester.

Slimecicle The God of Joy. A lovable goof who has never done a thing wrong in his life. He has a human wife, Grace, and his son is Connor. He skips around heaven a lot, and often hangs out with the angels.

Ranboo The God of Identity. He is *platonically* married to Tubbo (so Dream can't technically punish him!) He has a son, Michael, and he often hangs out with the demigods. He is considered the least powerful full god. He has a habit of forgetting things and also a habit of stealing all the gender from the other members of the Pantheon.

Niki Nihachu The God of Grace. She mainly takes care of the children along with Sam Nook, and hangs around the water nymphs. Her best friend is Sally.

Jack Manifold The God of Spirit. Previously nicknamed 'Thunder', he is an epic gamer lad. He famously invented 3D glasses and also Britain.

Ponk The God of Bravery. Has had an age-old rivalry with Antfrost because of his fear of cats for eons, and he is quite happy that he's gone. He has a strained love for Sam, which they have to keep secret. Only Sam has seen the rest of his face, under the mask.

DEMIGODS

Half gods, half humans. They are free to travel between earth and heaven.

Tommyinnit The youngest son of Philza and Kristin. A rambunctious teenager who is quite popular among the gods, especially Drista. Often flirts with the goddesses, and always says he has a crush on the Queen of England.

Tubbo The middle son of Philza and Kristin. A chaotic man-child and also goat boy. He is absouletly adored by the Trinity. He has a "platonic" husband, Ranboo, and a son, Michael.

Wilbur The eldest son of Philza and Kristin. A musical prodigy, who is an adult but doesn't quite act like one. He has a wife, Sally the water nymph, and a son, Fundy.

ConnorEatsPants The only son of Slimecicle and Grace. He is a massive sonic fan. If you asked life advice from him, he would tell you that the only problem with being faster than light is that you can only live in darkness.

SEMIGODS

Demigods, except it's not a 50/50 split between God and human. Other races can also be added.

Fundy The son of Wilbur and Sally. He is 25% God, 25% Human, and 50% water nymph, but most importantly, 100% furry.

Michael The son of Ranboo and Tubbo. 75% God and 25% human. He's good friends with Technoblade because of their shared pigman-ness.

NYMPHS

Mythical and elemental creatures.

Sally A water nymph. Married to Wilbur and the mother of Fundy.

HBomb A rock nymph. Often helps Foolish with his builds.

Alyssa An air nymph. She's been wandering around the outskirts of heaven for an eon with Callahan.

Callahan An air nymph. Wandering with Alyssa.

Minx A fire nymph. Best friends with Schlatt and Niki.

ANGELS

Heavenly servants.

Punz First archangel. He's currently the Trinity's bitch, but if you offered him enough money he would absolutely betray them.

Purpled Second archangel. He just follows Punz around and helps him with his tasks. He isn't very devoted to his job. He was the one who came up with the idea of space.

Red Velvet Third archangel. He has fleed heaven with his boyfriend Antfrost. He's working as a baker on earth.

Michael McChill Replacement third archangel. He was created out of a necessity for three archangels, and he isn't very well adjusted. He has no motivation and has only talked to Philza.

Vikkstar The guardian angel of all the demi/semigods. When he's not watching over them, he is hanging out with Lazar.

Lazarbeam The general of the heavenly guard. He slacks off very much, and often hangs out with Vikkstar. Aggravated easily.

Clara The first angel, and the most wise. She is seen as an oracle and is prayed to as frequently as the gods. She often hangs out in Tommy's dreams.

Sam Nook An altered copy of Sam, made to be a nanny to Tommy, Tubbo, and Wilbur. Now he takes care of young Fundy and Michael.

HUMANS

Just like you and me. Except some are dead.

Kristin Married to Philza and mother of Tommy, Tubbo, and Wilbur. When she died, Mamacita offered her a job as the Grim Reaper so that she could hang out with Phil more often.

Grace Married to Slimecicle and mother to Connor. Is the second Grim Reaper, alongside Kristin.

Ghostbur Human clone of Wilbur that Foolish accidentally made when fooling around with the demigods. Has since died and chills out in the animal sector with his sheep, Friend.

Lani Tubbo's sister from his old foster family on earth, who he lives near. Knows everything about everyone in the Pantheon, somehow.

Corpse Husband The janitor of the Underworld. Was a massive sinner when he was alive, but managed to convince Mamacita to let him work for her instead of suffering for eternity.

Mr Beast A generous billionare who runs a private church for the rich in his town. He communes with Karl on the condition that he won't try to gain things for himself using him.

5up A turnip farmer who died and now hangs around Fundy.

.....

Alright. That's it. So. Much. Typing. My fingers hurt. I accidentally deleted all my progress around the halfway point but I persevered. Also, this blog will be used for designs of the AU characters I'll be making. Thanks for reading this far!

Bye. Thanks again.

Oh wait now I have to add a shit ton of tags ughhhh

[queen-of-bel]

i think someone already asked for paz and kaz?? if not then them, in case someone asked for them, kandori and maki for the hc meme!

MY TWO FAVE DUOS EVER. i’ll do them all bc i could fill out a hundred prompts about them

Persona 1, Persona 2EP, general Metal Gear spoilers incoming

Putting under a read more because it is loooong (sorry in advance)

Kandori

realistic: Oh, Kandori was absolutely the one who alerted Nanjo to his existence in p2ep. I’ve written multiple posts on Kandori’s motivations, but bottom line, Kandori wanted to work against Nyarlathotep’s plans as much as he believed his fate would allow him to. Kandori had infinite strength and should have been the impenetrable stronghold that kept Tatsuzou safe. He is the only boss in the entire game to not have a low health stance, and he resists everything. He’s able to catch Tatsuya’s sword with one hand, as Tatsuya says:

“Kandori tilts his face out of the way, and when my blade grazes his ear, he grabs it with his left hand. All I have to do is pull back, and it’ll cost him his fingers. He gives me a broad, natural smile. However, even when I yank it with all my strength, my sword doesn’t move a centimeter. It’s like it’s caught in a vise.”

Kandori’s revival should not have been found out by anyone (especially since everyone watched him die the first time). But somehow, the word leaked back to Nanjo. It’s not impossible to think that it was Togashi who leaked the information, but there’s a line of Kandori’s that really makes me think Kandori himself was the source.

Once Maya et. al + Tatsuya arrive on the Nichinmaru, Kandori says that “all the players are in place”, implying that he’s the one who brought them all together like this. This was a very meticulously crafted plan, and it only could’ve worked if Nanjo heard of Kandori’s revival, which leads me to believe that it was Kandori, not Togashi, who spread the rumors of his own revival.

while it may not be realistic, it is hilarious: Due to the high levels of contempt he feels for Tatsuzou, I’d love to think that Kandori just fucks with Tatsuzou constantly. He’ll move all the furniture in Tatsuzou’s office just a few inches to the left, or he’ll swap the position of some of the books on his shelf. It’s infuriating to Tatsuzou bc Kandori’s antics are just enough that he knows something is off, but he can never pinpoint exactly what it is. Kandori, meanwhile, insists that nothing is wrong, and convinces Tatsuzou that it’s just his old age getting to him.

heart-crushing and awful: I bet Kandori kept tabs on the P1 crew during his time under Tatsuzou. While he’s said to have an obsession with Tatsuya, there’s no reason to believe that the care he showed for Maki in P1 went away, and he’s grateful to the P1 cast for saving her. I like to think that Kandori found out that Reiji’s going to have a child, and stashed away a large amount of money (bonus points if he embezzled from Tatsuzou) to send to him, especially since Reiji’s girlfriend’s house collapsed. Kandori doesn’t sign his name on it or anything, so the money arrives to Reiji in an unmarked envelope, with only Reiji’s name written on it.

Reiji first thinks that it might have been Nanjo who sent the money (because that envelope is packed, and Nanjo is the only person he knows rich enough to send that much). Nanjo denies this, and after a while, the two of them come to the conclusion that the only other possible person could have been Kandori. Reiji thankfully accepts the money, and this whole incident reinforces in his mind that “Takashi” was the right name to choose for his son.

unrealistic: In order to cope with the boredom and emptiness he felt as SEBEC’s Mikage-Cho branch president, Kandori set up a secret room in SEBEC filled with video game consoles. During the height of his depression, Kandori would just be so engrossed in his games that he would forget he has actual meetings to go to. Cue Takeda apologizing profusely to clients, saying that Kandori’s running a bit late, and Takeda has to practically drag Kandori by the collar out of the little gamer den that he’s created for himself.

Maki

realistic: After her training under Eriko, she realizes that she misses painting and wants to pick it up again. She eventually incorporates that into her profession, becoming an art therapist.

while it may not be realistic, it is hilarious: Maki really wants to be good at baking, but she’s terrible at it. You know, like this:

She knows that she’s created a monstrosity but at least it’s still edible, right? So she brings these to P1 cast reunions. Nanjo is just appalled, and has to excuse himself because he knows he’s just going to be too blunt (prompting Mark to call him a “dickweed” again). Yuka, having no filter, just straight up says how horrible they look, but then she offers to teach Maki how to bake, since she’s pretty damn good at it herself.

heart-crushing and awful: Maki definitely regrets not accompanying Maya to the Nichinmaru. She doesn’t blame Nanjo/Eriko for not being able to save Kandori, but ever since she heard that Kandori was alive again, she’s wanted nothing more than to talk to him again.

She thinks that if she were there at the undersea ruins, maybe she could have convinced him to come along with her. This regret is just going to add to the massive amounts of guilt she feels over the Mikage-Cho incident.

unrealistic: It took ideal Maki a while to perfect her “cringe” negotiation. When she first tried it, she would burst out laughing too much, absolutely ruining it, and angering a lot of demons along the way.

Paz

realistic: Kaz has constantly asked her to come feed treats to Nuke with him. She’s always agreed, because that’s the role she’s supposed to play, but she really hates it at first. Eventually, as she comes to like Kaz more, it becomes the highlight of her day, and she begins to really look forward to it. She finds herself prolonging Nuke’s feeding sessions, just so she can spend more time with Nuke and Kaz.

while it may not be realistic, it is hilarious: So you know how Paz couldn’t stand Kaz at first? She wasn’t exactly subtle about it, so everyone at MSF knew that Paz thought Kaz was an enormous idiot. Cecile was so happy to find someone else who felt that way about Kaz (and she’s always wanted a reason to get closer to Paz), so she goes to Paz to air her grievances about what a pest Monsieur Miller is being. Paz, meanwhile, does not give a single shit. She still thinks Cecile is just a ditz, and now she’s irritated that she has to deal with both Kaz and Cecile’s annoying antics.

heart-crushing and awful: I’ve thought about this for a long time. I really have. But there is nothing, absolutely nothing that can be any more awful than what we got in canon. I have a lot of characters that fall under the “deserved better” category, but Paz takes the top of that list.

Paz is a unique character in Metal Gear in that she was not supposed to have anything to do with war. Other characters’ lives in the series were intertwined with war, whether by choice or by fate. Even characters like Chico or Sunny were born into it, given their parents and upbringing. 

It’s never clear how Zero was able to come in contact with Paz, but I think it was intentional to never specify it. It’s not important to know how Zero found Paz, because fundamentally, Paz is not an important person. She’s nobody special. She was literally just some random orphan living in the US, and Zero went out of his way to drag her into his plans.

To me, Paz’s character parallels the child soldiers in Zanzibar Land. They’re both representative of how ruthless Zero and Big Boss were in their quests to fulfill their interpretations of the Boss’ will. Zero and Big Boss were both willing to employ any tactic possible to reach this end goal, and they didn’t care about the pain and destruction they left in their path.

But I digress...

That being said, I think Paz felt sick when she saw MSF soldiers playing with the mini remote-controlled ZEKE that Huey had built. For her, it was just a reminder of the duty that she had to carry out. She wasn’t allowed to be happy at MSF, and she eventually would have to fight to the death with Snake.

unrealistic: Writing Love Deterrence with Kaz and Zadornov made her want to learn how to play the guitar. In my totally self-indulgent “Zero and Skull Face both get brain aneurysms and drop dead 4 days before Peace Day” AU, Paz approaches Kaz and asks him to give her guitar lessons.

Kaz

realistic: The morning after the monthly birthday party at MSF (you know, where Kaz invited everyone to see the real Kazuhira Miller?), he’s embarrassed as hell. He been so protective of Paz the entire night, and it turned out he was the crudest person at the party. He goes to apologize to Paz, and can barely look her in the eyes as he’s doing so. Paz, meanwhile, can’t stop laughing. Her opinion of Kaz had been softening ever since he visited her when she was sick, but interacting with him during the party had really made her like him. Kaz still feels a bit of shame, but upon seeing Paz genuinely laugh for the first time, he can’t help but feel so publicly embarrassing himself was all worth it.

while it may not be realistic, it is hilarious: MORE 90S FOXHOUND PETTINESS

The first year that both Big Boss and Kaz are at FOXHOUND, Kaz bakes a cake for BB’s birthday. As BB accepts the cake, he wonders if Kaz has forgiven him, but then he looks down at it and sees

And these are the cheapest, shittiest cigarettes that Kaz could make, because you know his petty ass rolled them himself. BB picks up a cigarette and it’s so sloppily rolled that it immediately falls apart and the tobacco spills all over the cake and the floor and BB looks up to Kaz and Kaz is just smiling back like

heart-crushing and awful: Ohoho, I have many thoughts as to Master Miller’s life post-Zanzibar Land and his final moments. Now that Big Boss is finally dead, Kaz’s life loses all meaning. Skull Face, Huey, Big Boss, they’re all dead, and suddenly, the decades of anger he carried with him has nowhere to channel itself to. I think he becomes an empty shell of a man, just sort of running on autopilot.

So when Ocelot breaks into Kaz’s house to kill him, you absolutely know that Ocelot wasn’t discrete about it. There’s no way that Ocelot’s overdramatic cowboy ass didn’t gloat about it, to show that he was able to get the upper hand in the end.

Kaz just doesn’t care.

Kaz’s life is plagued with regrets. While none of it was intentional, his impulsivity and short-sightedness has really screwed over a lot of people and absolutely destroyed so many people’s lives. I think when Ocelot came to kill Kaz (and I’m going to toss in a bit of torture, just because Ocelot’s petty ass remembers Kaz complaining about Ocelot’s getting “too many kicks from his ‘art of interrogation’”), Kaz just resigned and doesn’t even attempt to fight back. He knows that this is a sad and undignified way to die, but he believes that this is karma and he deserves it.

unrealistic: Okay I’ve talked about this a little, but I want to add to it.

Kaz absolutely kept a Burn Book like in Mean Girls.

After MGSV, Big Boss and Ocelot make their way in the book as well. Underneath Ocelot’s picture, Kaz writes “Too gay to function. Also, cowboys are stupid.” BB has got 5 whole pages dedicated to him, but the line that Kaz is most proud of is “Didn't shower for a month... during SUMMER, and to this day still hasn't washed his hair.”

Thank you for asking!

send me a character and i’ll give you some headcanons

[taraninja]

Review of A Ghost of a Chance

Just in case my review is too long for fanfiction.net, I’m posting it here. 

To start, I want to apologize for the tardiness of this review. I actually began writing it after finishing Chapter 34, but thanks to College finals and the holidays it’s only getting out now. I like my reviews to in some way reciprocate the amount of effort the writer/writers spent in their fanfic, so this was definitely a multi-day project.

Firstly, I’d like to go over the characters and characterizations. Others have pointed this out as well, but you truly do get their personalities down perfectly. There were multiple occasions where I was tricked into reading this as if it were an episode screenplay, which is perhaps the highest praise any fanfic could achieve. Master Splinter is as elegant and effervescent as always, but you delve more into his character than the mere surface level; he also shows off humor, worry, empathy, concern, and of course, the love he feels for his sons and daughter is truly palpable. A great example is in his dealings with the Lotus; he is able to disagree in a way which shows honor and maturity, and even when the Lotus leave, he does not press the issue but let’s both parties (Donnie/April and the Lotus) have their disagreement and move on. It sent a perfect message to Leo that sometimes, interference is worse than simply letting an argument run its due course. I wish someone had taught that message to 2003 Leo, so maybe he could have avoided getting entangled in the gang wars.

Speaking of Leo, there are several facets of his character which have been masterfully delved into here. Something I prefer in the 2012 show is how they show that Leo is much more than just a serious and dutiful leader; he can also be awkward and silly at times, and this is perfectly encapsulated in his conversations with Karai within this story. Instead of distracting from the main plot, it melded perfectly with it and even helped to add to the plot. Karai has trouble getting used to life in the sewer, but has no problems understanding Leo and getting him to hopelessly unravel himself when talking with her. In contrast, Leo seems unsure of where he stands with her, and sometimes doesn’t know what the right approach is. Should he flirt back, or would that be too forward? Are their conversations one big game, or do they mean something to her? And are her questions meant to be taken literally, or as part of a running joke? As a master of deception, I can imagine how confusing talking with her must be. But on Karai’s part, it must be lots of fun, since it’s really more like she’s gently prodding him into taking the first step. I can still vividly imagine the chapter where they spar together, both teasing each other and then that one moment Karai thought she might have pushed too far. The tension between them was so thick that I could feel it past my computer screen, and I inadvertently held my breath as Leo drew closer and almost, ALMOST kissed her, but then revealed that he had just been teasing her back. That scene was perfect poetry, and it really showed me that you get their dynamic. You understand how and why they work, and that’s always great to see in a fanfiction.

Of course, Leo and Karai aren’t the only two lovebirds who have amazing development here, and the next two I want to gush over are Raph and Casey. I’ll admit that I didn’t really ship them before, but after reading this, you’ve made me a believer! There are of course, multiple ways a gay romance can go wrong; it can either feel too pushy, or not pushy enough, depending on the way it’s written. However, I think it was perfectly handled here. Our titular Raph and Casey start as more on the ‘bromance with benefits’ side, which works; a slow beginning helps get new shippers like me to see just how it can develop. Both of them have very similar outlooks and personalities, so there’s already that common ground between them, and then the scene where Casey gets drunk allow us to see them acting uncharacteristically caring for each other. Seeing adult Casey and Raph making out is definitely a—unique way to kickstart the romance, and a rather believable one. As someone who’s bi, I’ll readily admit that curiosity is what often causes a spark in a relationship like theirs. And again, the slow burn is the smartest move when it comes to them. Their kiss was left open-ended, as you could say ‘oh, they didn’t like it’ and not ship it, or you could think ‘hmm, I don’t think their answers were all that truthful’ and continue to ship it. I personally count myself among the latter category, but either way, their scenes have been written exceedingly well so far and I can’t wait to read more of them.

And, of course, my personal favorite ship, the one that made me get off my butt and read this fanfic; Apritello! After Chapter 34, I was squealing for literally hours. It got so bad that my roommate, who is not even a little into TMNT, forcibly grabbed my shoulders and ordered me to stop jumping around like a ping-pong ball. So suffice it to say, I have a lot to comment on when it comes to this dynamic within your fanfiction.

To begin with, I am SO glad that the music box was brought up again! When April pushed it aside in the “Bigfoot” episode, I felt so sad for Donnie and was more than a little peeved at April. It was no wonder that Donnie felt like ‘just a mutant’ with the way she was treating him; she pushed aside his heartfelt present, never lets him speak about his feelings with her, and yet continues to lead him on with hugs and kisses instead of actually being clear with her emotions. This is not to say I entirely faulted April, as having two boys crushing on you is never fun and is a situation I’ve had trouble with in the past. But nevertheless, it felt like a breath of fresh air to see the event be brought up and mentioned again between the two of them here. It gave the ship some well-needed groundedness and maturity, so that it could develop beyond just two lovesick teenagers. And oh, how beautifully developed it is! Of course, it begins rather bumpily (April, why d’ya have to take your anger out on Donnie? Him who would never fault you, ever?) with April asking out Casey for dates, keeping it a secret from Donnie, and then trying to get closer with him while not revealing anything to him. But there’s been tons of cute build-up too! The whole ‘evil scientist and best lab assistant’ bit has to be the most adorable love-speak ever, and of course, the silent glances at each other and the secret armor Donnie built is super sweet as well. And there’s no possible way I will ever forget when Future Donnie shook current Donnie to his senses and sent him chasing after April, which resulted in the most romantic scene of all time. Oh yes, it was certainly sappy; but it was a sappiness that felt VERY well-deserved and had been a long time coming. And I’m also really happy that you had Splinter inform and reassure Kirby on all the goings-on; I always feel bad for parents when their children hide things from them within stories, and it was yet another source of relief when Kirby was not only fine with April and Donnie but gave them the go-ahead. I knew he was a good father, but now I’m absolutely certain of it. And that means that April can continue her relationship with Donnie and the others without fearing for her father or focusing solely on college. Not to mention, dating Donnie can only mean good things for a future college career.

Oh yes, and then THAT ABSOLUTE BOMBSHELL in episode—I mean chapter (oh boy you know it’s good when I start calling it an episode!) 35, where April had to watch Donnie get knocked out in front of her. My heart definitely wasn’t shattering into a thousand tiny pieces at that moment (sarcastic tone intended). I’ll get into more detail later when I discuss the pacing, but man, did that scene hit like an oncoming bus.

Of course, I can’t leave out Mikey, the Future Turtles, or the Lotus from my gushing on the characterization! Mikey was at his most hilarious within this fanfic, and I’d even go so far as to say he was handled better within this story than in the usual 2012 episodes. Able to be light-hearted, a prankster, a gamer, and life of the party while still having a certain level of gravity and groundedness goes a long way to show that though Mikey may be the party dude, he has a charm and worth that is so much more than just cracking the odd joke here or there. While Leo and the others were certainly excited to have the Lotus staying with them, it was Mikey who went the extra mile to try and learn as many names as possible. And Mikey is the one who coordinated their family movie night to try and get ‘Karaiwa’ cheerful again. He’s an absolute gem who I want to protect, yet I also know that he is beyond capable of protecting himself.

I’ll admit that the Lotus took a bit of getting used to. When I heard there would be another ninja clan, my impromptu thought was ‘ah yes, the perfect way to insert OC’s’ because that’s usually how I’ve seen it handled within other fanfictions. But it definitely didn’t feel that way here. Though they were all original characters, they only served as big of a part as the plot required and were beneficial to the story’s development, instead of detracting from it. Hachisu-no-Hana served as a great parallel for Splinter, as both are heads of a clan who had been wronged by Shredder, but who took very different responses to said wrong-doing. Wakai wasn’t around long, but he emanated a youthful simplicity that made it hard not to like him, and of course Juro and Atsuko were easy to like as well. In the end I found myself liking the clan quite a bit and was hoping for their well-being just as much as I hoped for Karai’s.

Finally, we have the Future Turtles. It’s a bit harder to speak on their personalities, since they are literally different versions of the same characters within the story, but I think they were sufficiently developed enough to stand out from their current counterparts and show how the passage of time can truly make a difference. Leo has of course become a lot more serious, and along with all the other future characters, his moral compass is more black and white. Either you are on his side, or you are an enemy that deserves death; there is no in-between. This change is devastating to see when compared to how Leo currently is, and I would certainly be interested if you ever decided to do a spin-off fic detailing how the future turtles got to their current states. A lot of details have been divulged already, but like any good reader, that just leaves me wanting even more.

Future Raph and Casey seem to do a lot more laughing and have lot more fun than I would have thought, but it makes sense in the context of their relationship and is yet another great addition to their dynamic. Being in a relationship not only strengthens their bond, but themselves as people. Current Casey definitely can’t be described as sensitive, but Future Casey is not only willing but able to lend April an ear along with some solid advice. And Raph is seen helping Leo out more than arguing with him, which really warmed my heart. After Future Splinter’s death, I can imagine how hard it must have been for the turtles; but especially for Leo, who already had a heavy burden as the team leader, but with Splinter gone, that burden can only have hardened. I’m glad Raph decided to step up somewhat and help support him, instead of escalate their rivalry. It shows maturity and caring on his part, both attributes which I believe Raph already possesses, but doesn’t choose to emphasize.

In contrast, Future Mikey and Donnie seem much more solemn than their current selves. Mikey still has that fun-loving spark, but through his calmer mannerisms and way of speaking it is evident that the future events have tampered him down just as thoroughly as they tampered down his brothers. And while Donnie’s seriousness could be attributed to the important matter at the forefront of their time-traveling visit, I believe there’s more than the fate of his family which keeps him grounded. He’s always been the problem-solver of the group, and his brother’s reliance on him can only have escalated after Splinter’s demise. Plus, he lost the ‘best lab assistant in the world,’ so there has been an additional mental and emotional burden for him to carry. And though you didn’t go into the repercussions for this in too much detail, I imagine it must have been absolutely soul-crushing to see Casey go from dating April to Raph. The thoughts of “April is so great, I would have done everything in my power to make her stay,” “how could he abandon her like that?” “Maybe April feels the same way; maybe she was never into guys” and even “maybe she only dated Casey so she could finally get away from us mutants, and now that she has, she doesn’t care anymore.” I don’t know if he’d actually think like that or not, but I can envision him doing so. It must have caused at least a temporal shift between him and the two lovers and cooping himself up within the lab has obviously become a habit at this point. If he still remains within the lab while brought back to the past while his father is alive, then there’s no stopping it at this point. But hopefully he pulls himself together in a similar fashion that current Donnie did, and fixes his relationship with April. That would certainly be an ideal ending, if not an altogether realistic one.

Alright, now to more boring aspects of the story. First off; Grammar! While this has for the most part been on-point and smooth, there are some small things which could have been better to give the story a better flow. Most of these are nit-picks, because there aren’t many faults within this fanfic, but I think they bear mentioning. There were some misplaced words here and there, like “to” instead of “too” (slightly hypocritical since I KNOW I’ve probably made a similar mistake in this review alone) adjectives which were repeated three or more times in a paragraph, and one particular (and this is the most nit-picky comment of all) word phrase which stuck out and really bugged me, which was ‘portable portal.’ I believe the first time you used it, you had just described how the portal was transferrable, and my first thought was “well, if you wrote a whole section describing it as mobile, why did you describe it as portable again?” And then I saw that phrase repeated more than five times, which just led my OCD brain to go crazy. It might also have more to do with the fact that both words have a “po-“ beginning and an “able” or “al” ending, so it sounds like a repetitive description word, but nevertheless that’s more of a me problem than an overall issue.

Next, there is the plot. I read somewhere that the best plots can be outlined in a sentence and described in ten paragraphs, which I believe definitely applies to this story. While my descriptive powers are not great enough to fully divulge ten paragraphs, I shall do my best to review it properly.

It starts out simple enough; Donnie gets a message from his future self and learns that not only can he communicate with himself past the bonds of space and time, but eventually he can meet his future self without the fear of a time paradox. As Donnie and his brothers prepare to meet their future selves, they meet up with a fellow ninja clan who also has a beef with Shredder, and multiple cases of drama ensue as a result. However, there is so much more than that to pick apart in the plot. There’s action, mystery, romance, secrecy, plus a lot of confusion and mixed feelings which help to add tension and character development. And all the character dialogues don’t seem abrupt, out of place, or like mere exposition; they all blend perfectly together to give the story the feel of a big mixing pot, with multiple themes, characters, and motives blending together to give the story/soup an exquisite taste.

I could be wrong, but I think the main message behind this story is that ‘it is not our actions in the past that define us, but our actions in the present.’ In the very first chapter, we see a lot of characters mingling together who all have argued or slightly resented each other in the past. There’s Splinter and Karai, who used to believe she was Shredder’s daughter and wanted revenge on Hamato Yoshi; Casey and April, the former who used to see Raph as a villain, and then later saw Donnie as a romantic rival; the latter who blamed the turtle’s for her father’s mutation, and avoided them for weeks afterwards; and though it’s more minor, the turtles have all had big arguments with each other in the past. But the fic starts with them all united, sharing ‘Sensei Day’ together and really rallying together as one big family. Yet even though they’d love that moment to last forever, it can’t. There’ll be new hardships, arguments and struggles they’ll have to go through, and sometimes it may seem that the bad outweighs the good, like when Karai leaves the lair to go with the Lotus. But if they don’t keep striving for tomorrow, to make the best of fate while at the same time carving their own destiny, then they’ll never know just how beautiful life can be. This is the message I think Future Donnie learned when he urged current Donnie to run after April, and what all of the Future turtles realized when they learned they could time travel to this point. It may have happened in the past, and it might be too late for their happy ending; but who says they couldn’t help bring a happy ending to other versions of themselves?

And of course, this message is closely intertwined with Splinter, Karai, and Oroku Saki. Shredder chose to follow in the footsteps of his former clan; to carve for himself a path of bloodshed and vengeance, which would dictate all the future choices in his life. Splinter had the choice to follow a similar path, but instead took the path less traveled on; the path of peace. This has opened new options for him, as he gained a new family, obtained happy memories to replace the bad, and got to know many amazing people he wouldn’t have otherwise. Who knows if he would have met April, Kirby, Murasaki, Leatherhead, or Kurtzmann if not for his sons? And while Splinter tries to tell Karai that to choose peace is to choose the higher option, Karai has been raised by the Shredder for too long, and her thoughts are obviously tainted by her false father’s teachings. After all, surely someone who hides away from a fight is the bigger coward…? Surely more honor belongs to the man who seeks out his opponents and does away with them…right?

This is all part of why the Shredder-Splinter-Karai relationship is so compelling. Karai is literally the gray line, separating Splinter’s white and Shredder’s black; she has parts of both of them within her, which makes her choices and actions truly interesting. Someone who is neutral is more relatable than someone who is wholly good or wholly bad, and (at least for me), we want to see what she does because we want to know how we’d react in those same situations. Personally, I can’t fault Karai for a single one of her actions and could see myself making the same mistakes. Even if every part of my rationale told me to trust Splinter, I wouldn’t be able to wholly turn myself away from someone who’d raised me from birth. I’d want to cut off that wrongness, that falseness from my life so I could truly feel free, and that perfectly describes what Karai does. She can’t separate what happened in her past, so she wants to cut it out; even though Splinter and the others don’t care about her past, they just want to help and support her current decisions. I hope Karai comes to realize this by the end of the fic, and that her bond with the others becomes stronger as a result of this whole experience.

For the final tidbit of this review, I’d like to go over the pacing. Like everything else within this fanfic, the pacing has been very smooth and well-handled, with one event following another like dominos falling one after the other. The first chapter starts with a peaceful scene, which leads into a comedic scene in the next chapter, which in turn leads to a romantic scene gone wrong in the third chapter. The progression feels very natural, and the slow as syrup beginning is perfect to help ease the reader into the action. I described the fic as a screenplay earlier, because the events really do take place in a movie-like pace. The tripartite structure has long been lauded as the perfect story system, and that still holds true to this day. Having three big acts which are either followed or preceded by a consecutive list of smaller acts is the perfect way to hype up your big scenes and give them more weight, which your fanfic certainly did.

I promised I would go into a little more detail for Chapter 35 and go into detail I shall. At this point I think you have the three-part structure down so well, that you’re even starting to instill it into your chapters! The first act starts out peacefully, if slightly tear-jerking; the Future turtles say good-bye to Splinter for the last time, and he had some great advice to give the four of them. Once again I found the fanfic hitting close to home with me, as my grandmother has Alzheimer’s and I know any day could be the last day I say bye to her. I swear, your fanfic is going to be one of those I return to over and over again just for the little personal tidbits of emotion it gives me!

Anyways, returning to the topic; the second part of the chapter sees the different groups initiating their plans. Leo, April and Mikey taking the secret passage by the church catacombs, and Donnie, Raph and Casey entering through Baxter Stockman’s lab. Of course, things don’t start out well for either group, as Leo’s group/Team Nerf gets the ceiling caved in on them, and Donnie’s group/Team Roof has some mutated human kids attack them. I was thinking this would be the point the Future Turtles come in to help, but since they don’t I’m sure there’s another aspect to the plan that the Leo’s are looking out for. Perhaps they realize that Karai would have split off from the main Lotus group and want to save some man-power to help her when the time comes.

And then, the third/final act of the chapter comes and gives me a minor heart attack. Three mutants aptly named Lock, Shock and Barrel enter the fray thanks to Rahzar, and don’t only injure most of the main fighters; Barrel knocks out Donnie as well. The turtles, Casey and April barely manage to defeat Barrel before the focus returns to Karai, who places herself straight in Shredder’s den amidst a throng of enemies. While cliffhangers aren’t my favorite things in the world (again; intended sarcasm), I do think it was perfectly timed here. Any more action taking place would just be too much, and at least you ended it in a way that reminded us readers of the important stakes behind their battle. Even though the turtles may be beaten and battered, it is imperative they push on; not just for their sakes, not even just for Karai, but also for the Lotus, Future Turtles, Splinter, and everyone else the Shredder has hurt. While it is true they can’t turn back time and reverse all the evil he has done, they can at least stop his hand right now, and save those that matter most to them. And that is truly the most important cause the turtles could have for their fight.

[traincat]

Can you share why you like the 2015 Fantastic Four movie?

Must a superhero movie be “good”? Is it not enough for a superhero movie to criticize the US military, large?

Okay, seriously, a little bit of background in three points: 1) I followed this movie from the beginning. Through the casting, through the reshoots, through the cryptic articles about how the movie would feature an unexpected romance that turned out to be right but not how we all thought -- I’m pretty sure a Ben/Sue cut of this movie exists somewhere, but it’s hard to argue that the only romantic subplot that exists in the finished film is... Ben/Reed, so. I got excited over stuff in the trailers that was cut from the finished movie entirely. I analyzed the hell out of previews. I almost stole a theater stand but it wouldn’t have fit in my friend’s trunk. I, no joke, bought the Fantastic Four peanut butter. And I had friends who were also excited for the movie, so we were having fun together. So the anticipation definitely has a part in my enjoyment of the movie. “Even though it came like that?” Oh, 100%. 2) I really like Ultimate Fantastic Four, a bad comic, so in a way I was primed to already be like “must a movie be “good?” Must it not simply give me the Mole Man?” (It did not give me the Mole Man.) Fant4stic is much more heavily influenced by Ultimate Fantastic Four than it is by 616 Fantastic Four, especially in its Reed and his relationships with Ben and with Franklin Storm and the think tank. Finally, 3) I really, really dislike the 2005/2007 movies. I think they’re flashy, sexist, shallow hot garbage pieces of filmmaking and I hold Chris Evans’ Johnny from all angles -- writing, styling, performance -- largely responsible for a wide fandom perception of Johnny Storm as a hotheaded playboy. I like Reed and Alicia but that’s basically it. 

And I can -- and have already -- gone over Fant4stic’s faults. It’s very clear that the movie largely falls apart after the time skip, but especially during the final battle, which is messy to the extreme. The extensive reshoots messed with the overall product to the point where you can pinpoint while watching what comes from which shoot, though that’s in part to the horrendous wig they put on Sue to cover up that Kate Mara had cut her hair for a different movie in-between. Josh Trank’s dogs did $100,000 worth of property damage, somehow, during filming. So I’m going to talk about what I like about Fant4stic, and here’s a really big thing: as superhero movies go, it’s different.

There’s something I hear a lot in discussions about Spider-Man films, when someone goes, “No, it wasn’t a good Spider-Man movie, but it was a good superhero movie.” Which is something I take issue with because how are we defining what makes a superhero movie good? And what people seem to think makes a superhero good is the MCU’s general formula -- not necessarily the content of their movies, but formula with which they’re devised, which does, it’s fair to say, make for a big office winner, too. And what the MCU does is it makes superhero action movies. It plays around a little with genre -- Captain America: The First Avenger is a war movie, but it’s an action war movie. Guardians of the Galaxy is a space action movie. Ant-Man is a heist action movie. It’s spun its Spider-Man movies as coming of age stories, but they’re action movies. This becomes a problem for a viewer (me, I’m the viewer) if you don’t really love action movies all that much.

In no way, shape, or form can anyone make the claim that Fant4stic is an action movie. Its one big superhero fight scene is a complete and utter failure and probably the worst scene -- probably because it was never meant to be in there. Fant4stic was meant to be a horror movie with a superhero angle, which isn’t all that surprising considering it was directed by Josh “Chronicle” Trank. And I’m really into using big superhero properties to explore other genres -- Logan’s dystopian western, TASM/2′s romance. Fant4stic’s horror. Some of the best parts of the movie are the ramping up to the accident. You know it’s coming. You know it’s going to go horribly wrong. You know Ben, in particular, played with a quiet but longing stoicness by Jamie Bell pre-transformation (and the only film Ben to be acknowledged on-screen as Jewish), is about to be, pardon the pun, doomed. And then there’s the utter horror of the aftermath: Johnny, apparently a burnt out shell, lying in the wreckage as Ben screams for Reed for to help him. Reed crawling through the smoldering chaos only to look back and see that his legs are still pinned under the wreckage. That’s good. A version of the film was apparently screened before the reshoots and the test audience found it “too dark” and I desperately want to see that cut.

In addition to Fant4stic’s horror angle, there’s the villain of the piece: the US military. Doom, despite showing back up last minute looking like lovechild of Annihilus and a melted toy soldier -- Annihilus was supposed to be an initial villain in the film, so the resemblance likely isn’t accidental -- isn’t the true villain of the piece. If anything, young ecoterrorist Victor who just wants to rule his own planet is kind of a charming concept. But the villain of the piece is the military, who wants to use the gate for their own purposes. The military imprisons Ben, Johnny, and Sue after their transformation and explicitly uses Ben as a killing machine. When Harvey Allen approaches Ben, he convinces him Reed’s abandoned him, and that he has to “play ball” with the government. Johnny’s youthful enthusiasm and longing to belong places him in similar danger -- Sue and Franklin explicitly talk about how, if they don’t do something, Johnny’s going to be used as a weapon. One of my favorite lines in the film is when Reed is brought back to the compound to see his reworked invention: “You made it ugly.” The film backs off on this at the very end -- it doesn’t stick the landing like TASM/2 does, where the ultimate villain that spawns the actual superpowered villains is consistently Oscorp’s abuses -- but it does better highlighting this than a vast swathe of other superhero films: the bad guy isn’t Doom. Doom isn’t the one who tortures Ben. Doom isn’t the one who remakes the gate with the express purpose of breeding super soldiers. It’s the military.

I also really like the characters within the film. I don’t think this is going to be hugely surprising to my followers, but really all you need to do to make me like a Fantastic Four adaptation is nail Johnny Storm, and Fant4stic nailed Johnny Storm. I think Michael B Jordan was really terrific casting, and I’m sad we didn’t get to see more of him in the roll, because he was great at portraying Johnny’s insecurities and his vulnerability, making his occasional moments of swagger charming instead of oily, like when he blows a kiss to a rival racer. Introducing Johnny with a drag race -- and with Standing in the Shadows of Love, which is a great Johnny song, and I love how music is a big thing for both Storm siblings -- established his ability with cars and his talent for building things, letting the audience know that Johnny is smart and capable, it’s just that he doesn’t feel like he is. I love this Sue, too, serious and blunt and a little awkward, incredibly smart and far more inclined to hold a grudge than her brother. I love how she’s styled -- her clothes are normal and her makeup is realistically minimal, not movie-minimal. There’s no scene where Fant4stic’s Sue has to strip off her clothes to use her powers, or where a sexy nurse exists so Johnny can hit on her and the audience can get their recommended fifteen minutes of female objectification.

Ben is, as he often is in Fantastic Four pieces, a standout, of course, and Jamie Bell gives a great performance, both anguished and full of rage and resentment and at the same time love for Reed, but it’s his design I love the best. The 2005/2007 Thing design is cartoonish -- the 2015 is monstrous. I love the first few Thing scenes where Ben seems to have trouble moving, dragging himself across the floor, because you get a sense of how incredibly heavy his new form is and how difficult it is to exist in it beyond just looking like a rock creature. The horror of the superhero transformation is built into Ben Grimm at his core, but here it doesn’t manifest in a lost fiance or children screaming on the street but in the difficulty with which he moves, the new grinding note of his voice, vocal chords landsliding together. It’s some really terrific work. And while I think Ioan Gruffudd’s Reed was actually a pretty perfect 616 Reed (more’s the shame about the rest of the films), the Reed of Fant4stic is Ultimate Reed in the beginning through and through. The precocious genius of his childhood, misunderstood by everyone but Ben until Franklin Storm sees him, the scene where he takes the kid’s model airplane and awkwardly apologizes afterwards (the “you’re a dick” line IS funny), his awkward attempts to connect with Sue, his attempts to connect with Victor. Like Sue, he’s straightforward and blunt. The way he isolates himself in his attempt to fix things. How gross his powers are in motion. The aforementioned “you made it ugly” line. I really do like him as a Reed. And Victor... Victor is hilarious. I’m sorry, but it’s true. I was on board back when they were like “he’s a blogger, he’s a gamer” like I was 100% down to see Doom’s tortured neon green on black LiveJournal screeds, and opening on Victor unwashed in the dark playing video games? Hilarious. Victor seeing glowing green energy and immediately going “I’m gonna f*ck it”? Superb. Is this a good Doom interpretation? Maybe not, but it was entertaining. I think they could’ve gone full Ultimate and put little metal hooves on him post-transformation, granted. It’s not the Doom I want for any upcoming Doom projects -- I want my science wizard monarch -- but I can’t say I don’t like the character that Fant4stic gave me.

Fant4stic is an imperfect film, but I’d rather have an imperfect film with characters and themes that I like and one that did something different than a perfect film made with the same old formula and the same jokes on the same beats.

Also, if anyone’s curious, since Fant4stic has no DVD commentary (a crying shame on so many levels), @johnnystormcast recorded our own in our Giant Size Annual and you can download it to watch along with our thoughts, which are very deep and not at all mostly about how Ben and Reed are in love in the film.

[thegraysquirrel]

Self-Promotion Sunday

For self-promotion Sunday from @mouseymightymarvellous , I would like to bring the following to your attention:

*scrambles to search for anything useful to promote* 

Oh! There was that one time I was making a promotional speech for Obito in the hypothetical situation of Obito in his prime (no Rinnegan though) fighting Shisui in his prime in hopes of convincing people to vote for Obito instead of Shisui! Below the cut, you will find all 3600 words of it... Because go big or go home.

(If I knew how the hell I would put this on AO3, I so would. But. Tags? Format? okay format would be easy probably I have no idea how to get this on there. Title? I know how to jump literal hurdles but I draw the line at figurative hurdles.)

One last thing! You might be asking, “Why?!” and I would shrug. In reality, I don’t like that Shisui’s Kotoamatsukami is regarded as unbeatable in the Naruto ‘verse. Everything should have a weakness and I just exploited my love for Obito as a character to throw him at Shisui and it worked remarkably well.

I will title this: 

Why Obito (who fell through literal cracks and out of reality as he knew it while regarded as dead last and then dead first) Would Beat Shisui (the legend, the martyr, the Uchiha genius that seemed to have it all in terms of skills and abilities)

Okay so I have thoughts and I have to live up to my “commenting disaster” name so here goes. If you ever wanted to know how authors could feel when they got a comment from me, then buckle in. (wow this turned out to be about 2 full AO3 comments, yes, this is exactly how writers will feel upon seeing my comments in their inbox!)

I think it’s a wild guess that Shisui would have been able to manipulate the complete Uchiha clan through Fugaku.

SHISUI’S JUTSU AND WHAT I THINK OF IT

SHISUI’S LIMITATIONS AND LACK OF EXPERIENCE WITH KOTOAMATSUKAMI I don’t think Shisui’s ability has ever been countered or met his match in the short time he spent on the pages of the manga. Shisui doesn’t know how to tell if someone is fighting the manipulation, and he CAN’T know for sure that no one could. Considering he could use it once every ten years and he is younger than Genma, he hasn’t even got a lot of practise with it. He’ll have used it, what, once? So let’s say he used it twice, since he’s got two eyes. 

That’s TWO instances in which he used it—are you honestly telling me that his technique is unstoppable because he used it twice with no one countering? I’m not buying this. We don’t know the limits, and Shisui sure as hell doesn’t either. 

(I’ll admit, maybe it’s 10 years because the crow does not share the Uchiha blood. We can say Shisui could not use it for 2 years for the sake of Shisui, y’know… being able to build a reputation with it. I think Shisui had his Kotoamatsukami when Itachi was 5 years old, so he had it for about 8 years = 8 or 16 attempts, IF he spams his technique the second it comes off cooldown like us gamers do. Otherwise, he used it TWICE at most)

PEOPLE SAY “THIS JUTSU IS IMPOSSIBLE TO BEAT/THIS DEFENSE IS MORE SOLID THAN A ROCK” AND WERE PROVEN WRONG Do I think everyone has the potential to beat Shisui’s genjutsu? Hell no. But we CAN’T just buy the people’s words for it when we have so little data and they actually have little data too. The people Shisui used it on probably weren’t even a challenge in the genjutsu department. Here’s my thoughts about when people say something about a jutsu being *waves hand* without weakness. 

Gaara was said to have Absolute Defence and Sasuke managed to penetrate it when he was a Genin and everyone was like “Whaaaat he got through the Absolute Defence how is that possible??”

In chapter 257, Kakashi says “There is no cancelling the effects of [Itachi’s Tsukuyomi],” but Sasuke still managed to do so later with an ordinary sharingan. Kakashi’s sharingan prowess in dealing with Itachi’s mangekyou sharingan were inferior to that of this particular Uchiha. Sasuke did it by putting a genjutsu on himself to break free of the former genjutsu.

I’m sure there are more instances when jutsus are called “impossible to defeat” only for someone to go in and say, “bitch, watch me prove you wrong.” Naruto did it with the 3rd Raikage, in a way. “Impossible to defeat” means nothing. 

The only thing we have for Shisui’s eye-technique to be unstoppable is his and everyone’s beliefs that it’s flawless. But really, if Itachi’s powerful Tsukuyomi could be broken by an individual Uchiha, then why can’t Shisui’s have flaws that can be exploited (by another Uchiha)? When fighting an Uchiha and it’s one on one, flee, is Chiyo’s advice—unless you are also an Uchiha, I amend, even if your eyes are still basic instead of the premium version. 

CLOSER LOOK ON SHISUI’S VICTIMS Follow me on this wild speculation. (If you’re still reading, you rock!) It was said that a different person would need to question the one under the genjutsu for them to even consider the possibility of being manipulated. Let’s also list off the people we know or assume have been under Shisui’s eye’s manipulation:

Bloody Mist ninjas

More Bloody Mist ninjas

Probably ninjas from other villages they were at war with (I honestly don’t know)

Probably the Elders via Danzo (I’m vague on the details, but very likely right?)

The Daimyo via Danzo (wow that was really a challenge to influence him. Someone without ninja skills.)

Mifune via Danzo

Edo Tensei Itachi via crow instructed by Itachi (well, the eye was instructed by Itachi)

If I look at the list, I’m not seeing anyone who would give Shisui (or the holder of Shisui’s eye) a challenge, especially as Itachi got under control willingly. Just like Kakashi had no trouble fighting Sakura, Sasuke, and Naruto in the first bell test, Shisui is on a level most people will never be able to reach.

The last one is the only one we know used on an Uchiha. We can’t actually conclude much or anything from it because Itachi orchestrated the Kotoamatsukami, but it was Itachi himself to make note of the manipulation. He was aware of the genjutsu. So the manipulation was noted.

MY CONCLUSION ON SHISUI He’s got the greatest genjutsu, but here’s the thing—he doesn’t know how to fight against other geniuses of genjutsu. It’s the same with eSports, when you are the best by far, you don’t get the experience against the people who match your skill, and that means you get rusty (YES I stole these words right from of a player in the LCS of League of Legends, be happy that I didn’t throw KICK a soccer metaphor at you) and since this tournament I’m arguing for is a knock-out, any mistake can cost you the tournament. His genjutsu is revered as the best, that it can’t be broken, but other jutsus that have been called flawless have been shown to have flaws that could be exploited. Shisui doesn’t have enough experience to have found them out himself. Shisui will win if his Kotoamatsukami works 100% on the enemy, but it’s less sure if the enemy breaks (partly) free.

But who could possibly have a chance of breaking free from it?

*RECORD SCRATCH* (In my document I had the following in a very big font. I miss my big font. ;-;)

MY ARGUMENTS FOR WHY OBITO CAN BREAK FREE FROM KOTOAMATSUKAMI (And why he can win it)

GENJUTSU AND MANIPULATION Obito is not just passing with genjutsu, he’s GOOD, because he was able to even control Yagura—a perfect Jinchuriki, someone who has a built-in pacemaker, but then a pacemaker for when the brain zones out of reality and needs to come back. He managed to somehow convince everyone that he was Uchiha Madara and he double-crossed the actual Madara too—this dude knows how manipulation works, even if that alone obviously won’t help him against a genjutsu of manipulation (it’s a good thing he’s got his own mangekyou sharingan, otherwise he’d definitely be toast). Still thought it worth mentioning. 

I hear you say, “Madara manipulated him!”

Actually, no, I don’t think he did?

Hot take: (I don’t know enough of the general consensus to know if it is a hot take) Obito was NOT manipulated by Madara.

Madara manipulated the situations, but Obito remained true to himself in reacting to them. Whether it would have been Madara’s super evil plan to kill Rin or if it had been The Leaf’s own incompetence at sending kids into dangerous territory (resulting in the deaths of said kids because the system is SHIT), Obito would have reacted the same. 

Yes, Madara is evil for playing with people’s lives like a kid does with blocks to build a structure, but Madara’s involvement isn’t important to the outcome. I think that Madara was unable to “genjutsu bullshit” his way into Obito’s mind, otherwise Madara would have hella secured Obito’s actions already. If Obito could have been influenced by “genjutsu suggestions”, no way in hell would Madara have simply kept asking Obito angrily, “Bring me to life, Obito, I hate being dead. I can’t become the Juubi’s jinchuuriki like this, Obito. Bring. Me. To. Life. (Wake me up.)”

Madara, feared by the world, didn’t use genjutsu on Obito from what we saw. He fell back on manipulating the circumstances for Obito, and the only reason I can think of that is because Obito isn’t susceptible to Madara’s suggestive genjutsu. 

Every time I watch the Obito and Madara episode, I just see Madara spouting words and Obito indulging the old man until he can get out of here. In my interpretation, the words have nothing to latch onto. When Obito returns, it’s his own choice. Madara’s and Obito’s interests aren’t aligning as much as Madara would like, and as such, Obito remains more than just Madara’s pawn.

OBITO IS HELLA STUBBORN (OOPS AND MANIPULATION AGAIN) ANYWAY, if ANYONE would be able to find a flaw in Shisui’s eye technique, Obito would. HECK, he even managed to keep his mind sound when the Juubi was driving him crazy. Like, that anime sequence when his limbs were torn apart? That thing. This dude got willpower and a stubbornness to follow the path he wants to take even if it’s really a dumb path. I might be easily swayed and manipulated, but Obito is not. Shisui wouldn’t even need his eyes to sway me, but on Obito he would need to give his 100% and, again, I’m not sure Shisui has ever been pushed to his limit, and he ALSO thinks that he’s impossible to beat so he’s not even going to give it his 100% (he might think he is, but you’ll only know how fast you can run when you’re chased by something you really don’t want catching up to you or if your alarm went off too late and you really need to be on time). Against Obito, it’s a flaw for Shisui’s ability that it’s about manipulating his decision, because Obito is a master of manipulation himself. He knows what Madara did to him. He fought the Juubi. Obito would walk into a tree rather than change his mind about what path he should walk.

OBITO HAS EXPERIENCE Obito at his prime also has a lot more experience with his ability, he knows his own limitations and how to use it as a part of himself. He can use it multiple times, he can use it in ways Shisui would not expect... Shisui would need to figure it out fast, and I think Obito at his prime (TWO Kamui sharingan) just has too many tricks up his sleeve for even Shisui of the Body Flicker to keep up with. 

MY SLEEP DEPRIVED CONCLUSION ON OBITO What I think Obito has: he got the stubbornness + sharingan skillz for weakening Shisui’s genjutsu on himself enough or maybe even completely repel it so Obito can actually still do things + Obito’s own mad skillzzz with Kamui. Shisui loses. 

TO CONCLUDE

I’ve got a lot of fanon thoughts (or maybe just my personal fix-it for canon) on Obito that I won’t unpack here (it’s that Obito is actually a genius himself even if it never showed clearly in his years pre-sharingan) because, hey, people don’t like reading 1k of random shizzle when they just want to vote for their boy Shisui! But please give Obito a chance because I feel he actually has a chance!

TL;DR 

Shisui has never been challenged in his abilities (especially not by an Uchiha). He won’t know what his all-out is for this, so he won’t go all-out 

Abilities have been called flawless before only for someone to be “hold my beer” and fuck them up. Case in point: Sasuke practically made Gaara cry

There’s been precedent of an Uchiha with normal sharingan getting out of what is hailed as one of the best genjutsus whereas no one without     sharingan would be able to do that alone (or at all)

Unlike Sasuke at that point, Obito has been a master of genjutsu and has a mangekyou sharingan at the point of fighting 

Obito knows what manipulation is and has even kept to his sanity* when the Juubi was tearing him apart. He has manipulated practically everyone, including a perfect jinchuuriki. He will be able to find a flaw in Shisui’s jutsu because he’s too stubborn to change his mind enough about yeeting (parts of) himself to his Kamui dimension when there’s danger

Obito knows his own ability like the back of his hand, including limitations, so Shisui will have a hard time fighting Obito if his own Kotoamatsukami isn’t winning the fight for him. 

*Okay, so maybe Obito isn’t completely sane, but Sakura wasn’t either when she fought off a jutsu working on the mind. I think Obito’s instability even gives him a cookie point

PLEASE GIVE OBITO A CHANCE I EVEN TALKED MY POOR SISTER’S EAR OFF DURING DINNER BECAUSE OF THIS

LET HER SACRIFICE NOT BE IN VAIN

 ---

(Counterarguments with my own reply I put in that document)

Honestly Great Argumenter for Shisui: my counter argument: Shisui is known as the ultimate uchiha genjutsu master. And hes also the best looking. ;)

         Me: In reply to greatest genjutsu master-- Would you say that Itachi was a greater genjutsu master than Sasuke? Because Sasuke broke free from ITACHI'S genjutsu. I'm not saying that Obito would put Shisui under a genjutsu--it's just that Shisui's genjutsu wouldn't hold as well as it normally would, and that might be enough already.

         HGAS: Shisui would still be faster than obito if we take genjutsu out of the equation completely Minato was able to almost kill obito due to speed so that can't be discounted. Obito had to retreat from his fight with minato.          Me: How old was Obito? 14? (Kakashi and Obito are both 31 at the end of Shippuuden, and Naruto’s birthday is in October, so Obito would have turned 32 in the following February of the war, and THIS means that Obito was 14 during the fight against Minato too, because Kakashi was 14 at the time of Naruto’s birth but Naruto timelines are terrible) I hardly call that his prime! And against Shisui, Obito will have two Kamui, whereas against Minato, he only had one. The fight would be different, I feel.

---

YO BECAUSE I STILL GOT TIME HERE I WILL ADD TO THIS. I warned you, if you feel confused where this is all coming from, you’re probably feeling the exact same things Mumma does at some of my Konoha Files comments. This is how I roll. AND PLEASE IF YOU WANT TO TALK KONOHA FILES HIT ME UP because I’ve got a lot more thoughts on that than on Obito vs Shisui!

EXPERIENCE Shisui graduated any age between 6 and 12, but we know that about two years later, he met Itachi who was 5, and 8 years later he died (I think he died when Itachi was 13 because there was more time between Shisui’s death and the other Uchihas’ deaths). Shisui died when he was between 16 and 22. (I am not familiar with the book canon!)

This means Shisui had at most 10-11 years of experience as a ninja. Yes, one year after graduating he got the Kotoamatsukami, so he got 10 years TOPS with his Mangekyou Sharingan which had a freaking long timer of usage in between, regardless of how many years we put it as; 10 years, 2 years, Shisui would have kept that ace up his sleeve so he would not spam the ability the second it came off cooldown.

Obito graduated when he was 9. At his prime he was 31 years old. That’s 22-23 years of experience for Obito as a ninja! He got his mangekyou sharingan when he was, what, 14 (at the end of shippuuden he is 31, and Kakashi is 31 too, so they might have been the same age—and then the Kyuubi summoning was when he was 14)? That’s 17 years of experience with his Mangekyou sharingan. 

Obito will have had way more battles with his ability than Shisui, way more opponents that would challenge his way of using his ability so Obito KNOWS what his flaws are. He knows what it will be like to fight against someone with kamui! He fought Minato and knows how the Flying Thunder God/teleportation can be used against him (and that was when he had his Mangekyou sharingan for less than a year!). In his battles, even when he was mostly forced to stay in the normal dimension because he needed to get his hands on someone, he has shown that he can slip body parts into his dimension even when he is attacked from all sides. His reaction time is solid (even if he is not because... dimension stuff).

Conclusion: Obito has more years of experience than Shisui at fighting with his mangekyou and more moments of figuring out his own limits and flaws and adjust his fighting style to minimize them. Obito has also had more momentous fights to test out his own abilities, including The 3rd Mizukage, The Fourth Hokage, Copy Ninja Kakashi with Kamui himself, other Uchihas during the Uchiha massacre (they count), Konan, Naruto and Killer B. Seriously, he’s more well-rounded than Shisui!

---

THE MIST Shisui fought ninjas, soldiers of the Mist and was feared by them. Obito won from the strongest ninja of the Mist, the Mizukage who was also a FREAKING PERFECT JINCHUURIKI and kept him under his control for YEARS. I know which feat I think is more admirable. 

SPEED Shisui is hailed for his speed, but the Body Flicker is said “To an observer, it appears as if the user has teleported. It is accomplished by using chakra to temporarily vitalise the body and move at extreme speeds.” Obito has FOUGHT Minato, who actually is able to teleport. This was 17 years ago!!! Obito has improved because he was just a fledgling who even had to figure out how his new arm worked!!! Yes, Shisui is faster than Obito, but Shisui will not be fast enough to pulverize Obito. Don’t forget, the kamui sharingan has the added benefits of being able to predict the opponent’s movements, see chakra, so Shisui’s speed advantage is diminished against any Uchiha.

OBITO’S TECHNIQUE Shisui has no idea what Obito’s technique could be and honestly, passing through him mid-fight is already a scary thought, just think how disappearing from sight and appearing could be. Heck, Obito could probably even be in his own dimension, spit fire, and then long-range Kamui it back to the dimension where Shisui is. The precision of it can be worth speculating, but if Obito can appear on a branch of a tree, then he sure as hell can know where exactly he’d send his fireball jutsu. He just does. He’s got the spatial awareness of the overlap between his own dimension and the one Shisui recedes in. And how would Shisui counteract this attack, huh? He can’t body flicker to Obito’s dimension.

Even if Obito stays in the dimension Shisui is in, Shisui won’t be able to exploit the weaknesses. It took Konan a long time to know what the timer for Obito’s ability was, and Konan had her own ability to exploit that weakness. From what we know of Uchihas fight styles, I am having a hard time figuring out what Shisui could do to exploit Obito’s timer—and that’s only if he can figure it out, which he won’t. No one but Konan has found out about that particular tid bit, to my knowledge.

Let’s say Shisui got a hit on Obito. A hit means contact and he gets sucked to the other dimension. Afterwards, Obito would return to the dimension with food and eat while Shisui starves. Win. I’m a bit fuzzy on the details, but the people who have managed to get a hit on Obito when Obito could use kamui (Remember! Obito could not use kamui when he was the Juubi jinchuuriki!):

Minato with his Flying Thunder God move when Obito was new to kamui, to his arm, and only had his right eye kamui and not his left

Kakashi but that was when he was in the other dimension while Obito was still fighting Naruto. Since Obito vs Shisui is a 1v1, this won’t happen

Kakashi because he used his OWN kamui to get a kunai to Obito. Uhuh, Kakashi got a lot of hits mostly because Kakashi had kamui.

Kakashi again, but that was because it would be hella stupid to phase out to the dimension that had a war going on.

Konan (she was so badass)

I honestly don’t remember more, do you?

Shisui is amazing with his body flicker, really, but Obito can dodge left and right. Shisui won’t get a hit on him unless Obito allows it, because Obito got the damn experience!

With two kamui’s, Obito’s transportation (himself and of others he holds on to) is faster, as we’ve seen when Obito and Kakashi worked together to move Obito to his own dimension. Obito’s speed has increased with two kamui’s. 

SHISUI’S TECHNIQUE Shisui is a softy. I’m sorry, but he is. Aoba lived to tell the tale because Shisui wanted to scare them off with his genjutsu instead of killing them. Danzo was put under a genjutsu by Shisui and Shisui thought it was enough even when the genjutsu was done (and then Danzo managed to take an eye of BODY FLICKER SHISUI, so hey, his speed ain’t gonna be the end of it all). Shisui relies on his genjutsu deterring people—that’s obviously going to be his go-to move, and it means he can be caught off-guard when it’s not as effective.

He’s good at Taijutsu (or at least, he would win every spar against Itachi but Itachi was 3-9 years younger, so…), but even Taijutsu master Gai didn’t manage to land a hit on Obito when he used his nunchucks--would Shisui really be able to do what Taijutsu master Gai could not? 

Another TL;DR

Shisui simply doesn’t have the tools against an Uchiha as experienced as Obito. Obito’s ability is a different kind of OP than Shisui’s because Obito knows how to use it as a part of him, whereas Shisui’s ability is something he has relied on very heavily because no one has countered it yet. Obito will find the weakness in Shisui’s “strongest” genjutsu and be able to win from Shisui because of all the battle experience against talented individuals Obito has had. Obito managed to unite the five nations all on his own, he was THAT powerful.

We’ve said before that Shisui is on a different level from practically everyone, but honestly?

Obito stares down on Shisui from his god tier level 

*mic drop*

[chattegeorgiana]

Gotta give it to you, watching/reading Boruto after the shit show Naruto was and analyzing the story... Holy shit, I'm still upset with how things went after many years of following and I'm unable to bring myself to read/watch the sequel or want to. I wonder how the shitty sequel makes you feel after everything that happened with the shitty original.

Welp, I must admit that being “freed” from Naruto and its canon, helped me a great deal in this matter. That’s why I am able to read Boruto with no problem.

I am no longer attached to it, therefore I can easily just get through the new phase. I was too attached like many others in the fandom to the old story. Maybe a little bit too much. Buuuuut that’s who I am, quite passionate when I am really taking a liking into something. And Naruto made it there. I don’t get attached to many things, I have about one story to each phase of my life. For example, for childhood Sailor Moon tops everything. 

Same with games. I am a gamer, but not that idk fanatic type. You can count the games I played on the fingers of your hand. It’s quite simple: all Need for Speed series up to Carbon (VIVA MOST WANTED!), Diablo 2 and 3, Starcraft Brood War and Starcraft 2, Sacrifice aaaaand I think that’s about it.

With Naruto I gave in because it seemed something else aaaaand due to its great symbolism. I have to admit I am a fool for love, ahem, symbolism. Even in school when we studied it, I was all over the subject. You wanna have my heart? Give me a story with mythology and symbolism and I’m all yours. That’s why I have great interest in astrology as well.

But anyway, getting back to the subject because I have derailed a bit once more (sorry for the bad habit!).

How does it make me feel? Curious. I have a curious mind and that curiosity of mine can be both a blessing and a curse, depends how someone wants to use it, haha. Guess it can be used for my own benefit or against it.

I’ve said in the past that I am done with Naruto - and I am, nevertheless. It’s not a story that I will recommend due to the illogical paths it took from a development pov and character development pov. After Pein arc it suuuuuuure went crazy. Imo, up to that point Naruto as a story was gold. From there on, the whole mess started if you ask me.But I still watched it and still gave it a chance because I thought Kishimoto would end it in a somewhat satisfying end for the story. Of course, he was never gonna satisfy everyone, that’s for sure. You can never do that because we’re 8 billion people on this goddamn earth and we each have our views and taste. However, I wished he would’ve stayed true to his intentions, to his authorial intent.

So what if Hinata grew popularity without doing nothing? Keep that damn Sakura development going on, damn it. Aside for everything else, this is something I will never be able to forgive Kishi for. Pairings aside, plot aside, everything else aside. I don’t care about them in the end, life moves on. But for this move, I’m like.. nah, bro. Ain’t doing it. This is the reason I’ll never ever ever support any  Kishimoto written story ever again, nor I will forgive him.

Of course, not that he needs my forgiveness anyway. I’m a mere human continents away, he’s a world renown writer who wrote his story. But that’s the thing here. Naruto was his story. He should’ve stayed true to it. Not change it at the last minute on the whims of a loud fanbase. It’s that resilience against external forces that makes you who you are, and the way you respond to it. Apparently, Kishimoto gave in.

And you know what’s funny about it, in the bittersweet sense, of course? And imma throw a little pairing shade here. People were quick to jump the bandwagon that “Naruto didn’t give up his love for Sakura”. But I am posing a question here… didn’t he really? I mean, think a bit logical here… if we’re to make an analogy, as we all know it Kishimoto always said that he identifies as Naruto. And in the interview with Kobayashi he said that no matter how much he tried to write about Sakura, he saw Hinata’s popularity grow inexplicably, so then, in the end he gave-up writing about Sakura.Therefore, in a parallel way (like he so much liked to build his story on), couldn’t one say that “Naruto gave up on Sakura”? 

Kishimoto always said how he’s fond of Sakura in her own way, because she was the normal one, she represented the human weakness.

But you know what the problem is? She was that mirror, Sakura was that mirror to our humanity, and thus to our weakness. In a world full of powerful ninja-gods, we didn’t like to see a human girl trying to attain her own worth through her own trials and errors, while showcasing human weakness at doing so. Why? Because she brought-us back to reality, out of our “genjutsu’d” way of living in that story. In that very story we all liked to live, where we had powerful Uchihas, Hyugas, Senjus and Uzumakis who were offered everything on a silver plate from birth, here came a girl who had nothing, no support, no special ability, nothing more but her brains.

And that girl was human, and humans are weak. And we are humans. And we don’t like that we’re weak. So of course, we had to take her out. By all and any means. And they did so. The loud fanbase whose name I won’t be naming right now did so.

And thus, Kishimoto, the Naruto of our story, saw himself forced into a corner to give up on his love for Sakura. Of his fondness of a character that was something else, than your usual god-like powered ninja. So in the end, yes… Naruto gave up on his love for Sakura. Take it shipping wise or authorial-character relationship-wise, however you wanna take it, but it’s the truth.

And that is my beef with Kishi. He could’ve made this open-ended, he could’ve made this like it is but with different development, a normal and in accordance with his story one. And I would’ve been just fine with it.

But he didn’t. He preferred to throw all that into nothing, throw Sakura away for the popularity of this wretched story. He took the short way out. And for someone who preached different in his story, boooy it so seems wrong.

However, I’ve made peace with it. I moved forward, accepted that this is the way he chose to deal with the situation. Now only my curiosity is peaked in seeing how will they deal forward with the story and how many retcons will they build over and over again in order to rewrite 15 years of development, for that “shock value” of the finale.

As someone who aspires to write her story one day, and who happens to work in marketing and thus knows the know-hows of how you advertise a product, for me at this point as I said, this story became a case-study from where I’ll be drawing my own conclusions on how to and how not to. Even if things didn’t fully went the way I predicted them (though funnily enough 80% did so and even do so in the current story with Boruto - which is odd - but alas), and one could argue that I am bitter because of the pairings and because I lost and whatnot, I am at peace. It was never about the pairings - though one could argue so because most of my writings were NaruSaku centered. It was about the characters themselves, the relationships and dynamics between them AND their development. A cornerstone in every well-built story. But alas…

In the end it’s as the old tale says: You win or you learn. You never lose.

[asryakino]

The Monkey God Wears Inlines

Chapter 3

To see the group of assembled young people would normally concern the casual observer. Their clothes were torn, studded, chained, decorated with patches and stylistically chosen pins. They seemed held together with neon colours, garish patterns, and copious amounts of belts, duct tape, and creative sewing techniques. Hairstyles ranged from slicked back and dyed a shiny black to spiked eight inches high and topped with a myrid of bright colours. The only unifying factor was an image of a mouse running on top of a cartwheel that was displayed on jackets, belts, vests or, like Maize and BDC, on bags firmly attached to the hip.

The wheeled denizens were taking laps around the fountain, weaving between mall patrons on modified boards and blades or leaned against a pillar at the edge of the area. The sound of boards and wheels on concrete blended with the water bubbling away in the fountain and the voices of people milling around, conversing and shopping.

"So about the new guy I've heard so much about?" Maize called out above the general din. Several faces turned toward each other in silent question, then looked around in confusion and shrugging. A small voice from one of a trio on quads circling the square's edge peeped up. "…said he'd be by later…?" She trailed off in uncertainty. Maize shook her head, but still smiled quietly. A tension she didn't know she'd been holding the whole way there melted out of her shoulders. The Rats were alright.

BDC raised a hand in greeting to the others, several smiled then pulled up to a stop as the pair got closer. A tall square-built guy with his dark hair in beaded twists stood abruptly. He hid the flinch of pain behind an easygoing smile and raised a hand in greeting. "Yo." His jovial voice lifted over the general noise of the arcade and fountain. "Tuck…" Mazie's voice rose just slightly and the big guy chuckled nervously, sitting back down on the fountain's edge with a mildly embarrassed rub to his stubbled chin. "Bobby told you huh?" He smiled, but looked away. "Uh-huh." She sat down on the edge next to him. Several of the others laughed and made various friendly teasing comments about how nothing got passed Maize and how one or the other of them should pay up or the like. She breathed a sigh of relief, taking mental stock of what each of her friends looked like. She'd seen it all before in the past. When crews would fight constantly. The way Tucker was leaning attested to a few cracked ribs being the culprit but among the others it was bumps and bruises; a few split lips, one broken nose, and black eyes - all the standard signs of a bad scuffle.

------------------

Signs that had become more common lately in a worrying turn. Alien crews had been showing up much more often lately- outsiders apparently thinking that Garwin was an easy mark. It wasn't unheard of, but the uptick in outside groups seemingly coming in with the express purpose of stirring trouble up was concerning. Of course, then there was also the randomly appearing, and seemingly knowledgeable, skater who swooped out of thin air to help. She wasn't really sure if she should be concerned or grateful for the mysterious stranger.

In a sprawling city like Garwin, it wasn't unusual to have multiple groups of people lay claim to various portions of it. It was said that territory battles between weaponized gangs were common in the larger and more dense metropolises. All out wars would break out between violent gangs and citizenry- or subtle strangleholds would take over. Garwin was wide, but not densely populated. Houses weren't stacked on top of each other; people didn't clamor over one another just to get from place to place. People lived comfortably, communities were fairly tight knit without being suffocating. There were affluent areas where the communities were gated and full of politicians and upper crust types. But a majority were plain people of different backgrounds and their communities reflected that.

Troubles had come and gone for the city throughout Maize's life there. She had a handful of long-time friends like BDC and some of the other Rats but she'd seen a fair amount of ugliness in Garwin already. It wasn't as if the city as a whole was dangerous, but like any large location packed with humans and a constantly changing atmosphere - things happened. Certain areas were always unstable, and you just had to do what you could to keep your own life secure.

Lately, trouble had come into the city with the surge of outside people coming in and thinking they could abuse the city. Desperation had bred Trouble. A new mayor had been elected who hadn't lived in Garwin for more than a couple of years, and brought with her a lot of new ideas. Ideas that would push aside the old town, the established, and the native population to encourage tourism and temporary citizens. Things that threatened the way of live for most of the city. She'd publicly decried how the older parts of the city were eyesores. How 'clinging to an outdated way of life' was detrimental. Most of the city hated her and she'd earned several unflattering nicknames for it.

Her grand plans to bring the unique city into her version of the future had opened up a lot of avenues for trouble. She insisted the newer areas had to be protected by  the police force. So patrols in the lower ends had all but stopped. Older shopping arcades and malls were abandoned by the major brands, and left to struggle with local businesses and smaller contracts. The handful of big-name stores in the older parts of the city were only there because they were entrenched. The Mayor was trying to cut the parts of the city she didn't like off. They held together only because of the communities within them. For a time, local crews took up patrols, like wheeled neighbourhood watches. Current and former students, those who were brave enough to make themselves a presence within their communities began simply existing outside and among the people. Skaters, gamers, the odds and ends. They found that being out and doing seemingly strange things kept trouble away. If there was a group of skater punks who met all the time in the local park and had a habit of skating up and down their streets, it was making life difficult for people who wanted to do things like rob houses, vandalize businesses, or be generally threatening. It got out that the worse types would stay away from areas 'protected' by skate crews. And so, crews popped up all over the place. The largest downside was that common areas where everyone had to go would become battlegrounds from time to time. Crews would mug each other at first, then try to out skate one another to show off. But it continually devolved into yelling and eventually fist fights. Though territorial disputes between crews came to a crawl when a new crew started out.

It was a crew like any other. Misfits, bruisers, the parts of a community that would normally be looked at with caution or disdain. The people that those like The Mayor would rather never be seen in public. With a tall leader with bright orange hair and their second, a smaller chunky girl with a round face and sweet voice they began uniting crews. The smallest ones first. No crew was asked to give up their place or their name. This new crew was an alliance. Everyone wanted the same thing - to be safe in a community and to protect it from outside threats. At first it was a handful of them going to all the smallest crews. Offering support and acting like diplomats between crews. They drew out new maps and mediated territories, they suggested common areas. And all they asked was for the in-fighting to stop. When new construction threatened a part of the city, it was an interesting mix of protestors to arrive. Wheeled defenders from all over the city would show up to public meetings, voice concerns, and encourage districts to speak up against detrimental  additions and speak up for what communities needed. The loud orange-headed Rat leader and the small mousey second were always there. Now, nearly every crew in the city had a patch that proclaimed them as part of the Pact Rats. But with the recent successes, new aggressive crews had been appearing.  Scuffles like this recent one had become more common. Someone had been rallying new violent gangs and trying to push Pact Rats out of their protected areas. They'd been testing the responses lately. Pushing in and openly threatening people, waiting to see who responded and then starting a fight. Most of the time it ended in some standard bruises, split lips, and superficial scars. No weapons had been brought in. This time had been different.

@apatheticalchemist @aspiderperday @nerdyblogname

[mockky]

A sad story how Russo bros reminded us about the crappy world we live in

Disclaimer (kinda). Preventing the arguments like “read the comic-book to understand the movie”. First of all I've never read the comics and never will. I shouldn't do that to watch a movie. It's the director's job to tell me a story. It can be changed a bit, but it still has to have a logic. This is author's priority.

I guess there's no need to run through the movie again and get to details, it's too many of them. Just a few big ones. Firstly, the time travel idea is pretty lame by itself. Every time-travel-movie does the same mistakes – PARADOXES, no one managed to escape it. So if you can solve your problem only by time travel – please don't do the movie, this job is not for you.

It's like the creators don't know the rules of their own universe. Nebula translates her thoughts to Past-Nebula, they're connected somehow even being far from each other, killing Past-Nebula literally doesn't do anything. How does it work? All this plan just fucked up the previous movies. And then some random rat actually saves the universe? Seriously? I don't know but I think it’s called “lazy writing”.

OK, there's no movie without a sin. But what's really important is the screwed up characters. No one did or got anything what one was supposed to.

Loki. His extremely stupid, reckless and suicidal lunge actually was extremely stupid, reckless and suicidal. The God of Guile threw himself with a toothpick against titan and dropped dead. Bravo!

Thor. I never really was a fan of him. But this is officially the worst comic-relief ever. Why he should be like some sort of that whiny drunk dumbass, especially after him being so cool and strong in Infinity war? Gods saved us from fart-jokes and slow-mo-food-fight. Thor lost his parents, lost his brother and Asgard. He's broken and crushed, and Marvel just points finger at him and laughs. Very mature.

Doctor Strange showed up to show us a very important finger.

Captain Marvel is a whole new level of pain in the ass. Skip the Boring-IMBP-part. Though it's hard to forget how they just shoved her in fan's throats, and expected them to have the same empathy for her as for Tony or Cap. But we know them for 10 damn years! The biggest problem that she's not a person, she is God ex machine with magic GPS in her head, invincible, strong-independent-woman and all. With that cockish face of hers, kicked Thanos's ass, but when it comes to the gauntlet, it's up to Hulk and Tony. What da hell? All that power, it's the only thing she could help with. And don't give me that "it's a big universe, not only you've got problems" crap. Thanos's snap affected THE WHOLE universe. Isn't he the main threat here and now?

And what really pissed me of is the ending and the way it fucked up the most interesting and deep part of it all – Steve and Bucky.

Allow me to remind you few points.

CATFA

We see Steve as this tiny subtle guy with heart of gold and strong will, he is hero inside. I can do this all day. He wanted to go to war, he took the serum, he's like walking embodiment of self-sacrifice and heroism. But he became “the chorus girl”, this empty symbol, a fake. Actual soldiers don't believe and don't respect him, cuz he’s never been in real fight. He does not respect himself anymore. But when his friend got in danger in the blink of an eye Steve transforms into this Rambo, alone against the world, flipped like a switch. He dashed headlong to the enemy's base just for tiny possibility his friend might be alive. At that very moment Steve becomes what he meant to be – the real Captain America.

CATWS

Steve managed to get through 70 years of brainwashing with only one phrase, and refused to fight Winter soldier hoping that there was still Bucky somewhere. The entire movie revolves around two of them.

CATCW

Some fans said that Cap and Tony should switch sides on this one, but it doesn't feel right for me. Cap's got a point. What if there's somewhere we need to go, and they don't let us. Obviously it is CATFA reference, where he goes against orders to save Bucky. And he's afraid cuz he knows that it could cost lives. And now he's running around the city protecting Bucky from the government and T'Chala. He fights Tony, bloodily, everything to protect Bucky.

What a lovely deep drama! It's a comic-book story here we’re talking about. I bet in CATFA no one really noticed sweet little Bucky. But the Winter soldier just stole the movie and fan's hearts. Steve and Bucky have this strong almost cosmic bonds, it's stronger than brotherhood or friendship, it was so since 40s. After all this freezing thing they became totally unique for each other. You can smash vibranium shield with that bonds (which Cap actually does symbolically when gives up the shield TWICE, both times for Bucky). It's unbelievable that after all he did for Bucky Cap could ditch Bucky for anyone or anything. Creators teased the fans and encouraged that bromance. It was openly a queer-baiting, it was a canon, and you can't stop the shippers.

Three movies were built up on this relationship. It was work of art if you ask me – so many details, so much depth, and the amaizing acting, I mean you can watch it over and over, and every time you find something new in their eyes or words. And they not just talk, they actually do anything to proof their devotion to each other. It's absolutely beautiful. And it's Bucky who made Steve interesting and alive as a movie character and a real hero as a person.

And what we get in the end? Bucky turned into dust in front of Steve, but on the group meeting Steve talks about... Peggy? Where did it come from? He doesn't mention Bucky the whole movie. Steve goes to return the Infinity stones and comes back an old man. For us, for Bucky, it was 5 sec, but for Steve it was 70+ years. He left Bucky and lived 70+ years without him. Besides he never said Bucky about his plan (or just desire or whatever), didn't say a proper goodbye, didn't consider it as a betrayal. He just decided to live for himself. By the way Bucky reacted as if it was a big surprise for him and even bigger disappointment. He was anxious during that scene when Steve suddenly didn't show up on the platform. And if you wanna say “Bucky knew it was gonna happen and was happy for his friend” then it's the great time to keep your mouth shut. He obviously wasn't happy with it, and he didn't know. Post-movie interviews don’t count! Don’t tell me that it was off-screen. It’s a MOVIE! If something is important – it’s on the screen and it becomes a canon. Stupid scene in a cafe with selfie and kids IS on the screen, apparently it’s important af and it’s a canon. Fat greasy-haired Thor yells at some gamer in chat – that’s VERY important and it’s a canon. But a talk between best friends when one of them decided to leave the other for good and go to the past doesn’t deserve screen time. Are you sure you set your priorities right? By the way Sebastian asked Russo about this. He thought there would be some dialogue between Steve and Bucky, but director said No, you already had that conversation.

No wonder Bucky didn't approach to Steve and only looked from distance. What can you possibly say to the man who claimed himself your best friend and then easily abandoned you just like that, lived without you for 70+ years and apparently was OK with it.

Steve just goes to Peggy. Because that's how it must be, that's natural, that's happiness. This cliché stuck so deep in the people minds, so they can't see anything behind it. I'm sure that not so many people knows what it actually means, but they believe that it's the right thing.

I might blow few minds now. Here it goes – the closest person is the one who shares with you your life experience, not the bed. NO WAY! I'm not saying than your partner can't be your friend. Spouses are not always the closest friends and the closest friends are not always spouses. You just can't screw up all Steve's emotional baggage that related to Bucky just for Peggy, which was in Steve's life, what, like 15 minutes? Steve knows Bucky since childhood, they were best friends, they supported each other, lived together, protected and saved each other many times. They share the same fate (war, serum, man out of time), there's no one who can be closer. “He loves her so much!” arguments can't erase too much of a history. It just doesn't work that way! You can't exchange one for another. A loved one can't replace your best friend, cuz of damn emotional baggage! You can have both, you can have none, but you can't trade it!

And what about Peggy? CATFA-Peggy was not a good person actually. She's whimsical and eccentric damsel. For example she shoots 1) at the experimental read not properly tested shield 2) with a chance to kill someone by ricochet 3) in enclosed space without ears protection for her or everyone else; she punches a soldier for an inappropriate commentary. And the scene in the bar shows Peggy as a simply impolite person – she ignores the soldier who just got back from captivity, it's very rude, especially when Bucky was polite with her. And on top of this I think she picked interest in Steve only after the serum. I bet Pre-serum-Steve was friendzoned for the rest of his life.

In TV-series though she appears to have a strong personality. She is an interesting character and not just love interest for Steve. She founded the S.H.I.E.L.D., had a happy fulfilled life. She let Steve go. And when she died, Steve let her go. I don't believe for a one second she is the love of his life. Staring at the photo is NOT a depiction of love. Not in my book. It's just a woman Steve once kissed.

So what went wrong? They made such a great Steve's character development, they put so much in his relationship with Bucky. Countless details, shades and layers. Every scene, every dialogue. An all of it just... puff... vanished.

Actually it wasn't so sudden as it seems. First signs of it appeared in Civil war. Did you noticed how the creators put the distance between Bucky and Steve? It's like “Hey guys! You know this whole story gets kinda pansy. We stand for cliché, for heteronormativity and happy ends! Every man got a girl! You can't have best friend, not the same sex, only hetero! So quit with the hugs end eye-fucking, more masculinity! Sebastian, you must get as thick as you can, so nobody could say you're gay. And Steve's gonna make out with a girl, just to be safe”. And this kissing scene is the most awkward I've ever seen. This weird kiss out of the blue, the fact that Sam and Bucky are watching (BTW how often do you stare at your friends kissing? Please, share at the comment section). Even actors call this scene awkward and weird, they basically hate it. And in fact that this scene wasn't it the script, it was added much later.

Then the forced friendship between Bucky and Sam. Moreover, they tried to replace Steve'n'Bucky's friendship with it. Sam rather has a chemistry with Steve, not Bucky. And the way Mackie and Stan here and there together on comic-cons where Mackie acts like he's Stan's BBF and Stan's just embarrassed. This whole all of a sudden friendship thing feels so unnatural and stretched. It's not like I don't wanna Bucky has friends and all, adaptation and stuff, But it doesn't mean Bucky doesn't need Steve, no one can replace him. And it all was only to make their friendship NO HOMO. But the way I see it, there wasn't anything gay about them (BTW I'm not a shipper and not homophobic), just some people have dead opossum's emotional range. In their head the man wants either bang you or kill you, nothing in between. I'm sure nobody took seriously the idea that they make them gay, or that they look like gay. It's just bromance. But noooooooo. They must've done this to them, cuz Happily ever after.

Eventually we got what we got. In Endgame Steve and Bucky are barely shares the screen together, even if they actually next to each other, they don't hug, don't talk, don't even look. Even after Bucky got back from the dust. It's like they never cared for each other.

Steve considered Bucky recovered after being tortured and brainwashed for 70 (it still blows my mind how long it is!) years, he's OK. No one said he's OK though, even Bucky himself. He's still the same wrecked man lost in time and his own head with tremendous weight of guilt and torn apart personality. It's not the same Bucky from 40es, and he never will be. Steve’s the only one who could break through to him, for Bucky Steve is like the ground he stands, the only guide light in this chaos that left of his life. According to Stan – Steve is the only thing that keeps Bucky alive. Well, Bucky, sorry pal, gun or rope?

Steve is an asshole. He thinks he's so special and good enough to rewrite Peggy's life (which was good for Peggy without Steve) just because he wants it. Abandons Bucky, who has nothing but Steve, abandons the world he fought for and called his home, and the friends called family. All this for the woman, who was almost nothing to him especially compared with Bucky and the others. All the things Peggy said in a hospital, all the character development and his words about the man died in the ice, new home and new family – all of it was fucked up, buried under that shit. You need to move on. Until you get a time machine. Then you can go back. So what is it? Maybe Steve never was a hero and hence he doesn't deserve our respect. Or, what is the most likely, creators think we are idiots.

Steve gives the shield to Sam. And I wouldn't mind. Why not. This job definitely is not for Bucky. He's tired, he's semi-stable 100 years old man, he had enough of war for two lifetimes. It's too much for him, it would be cruel for Bucky. Symbolism is a cool thing, but life doesn't work that way. Pep-talks don't heal. Get real, OK? Sam is a new Cap, fine, it's logical. But it's always about the How, not What.

From the moment Bucky sees the old man on the bench til the end of the movie Bucky didn't even think about to approach Steve, he sent Sam instead. They didn't talk, Steve didn't even look at him. This entire scene Bucky has this endless sadness in his eyes. There's a glimpse of a smile when he looks at Sam, but in the moment it's gone. And then it's pain and sorrow on his face again. I don't really see happy Bucky. 

Just look at his eyes and tell me you look the same when you’re happy

And actually Steve doesn't sparkle with joy either. He kinda lived his “happy life”, but there's no sign of it, especially that he refused to talk about her. 

But it's confirmed information – Peggy's mysterious husband IS Steve Rogers.In the end Bucky got this last slap on his face. Bucky asked himself if he worth all of it. NO. No, Bucky, fuck you.

I find it funny (seriously I don't) that it's the same directors and screenwriters, who did Winter soldier and Civil war. How could they screw it up? One might say “Cuz there's TV-series Falcon and Winter soldier coming, it needs to be this way”.

A few little ideas for ending that wouldn't do any harm.

Behold!

1.  If they want Steve out of it, why don't kill him? Canonic, right?

1.1 In final battle Steve is dying. He tried to shield Bucky and dying on his arms. He can give the shield to Bucky, so his broken and lost friend could have purpose in life that helps him to move on. Or he can just die and Bucky takes the shield as something in memory of Steve. And then Bucky gives the shield to Sam, like saying “I've lost it all, I've lost my friend, but you're a good guy and maybe we can become friends sometime”. If it happened like this I could in time accept Sam as a new Cap and Bucky's friend.

1.2 Or perhaps Steve, still dying, gives the shield to Sam.

2. This one is not so good idea, but OK. Steve goes to the past, his a douche. But if you want a TV-series he can’t take Bucky with him. And it's still the same – Steve gives the shield, doesn't matter who would it be (pick anyone you like). But Steve can’t leave without saying goodbye.

Oh my god! It's two of it and we still got the TV show! Fascinating! And there is more of it.

3. Oh that's the good one. The one with the Steve we know and love. Steve stays. Steve goes to the past to return the infinity stones. Steve could allow himself just a moment to be selfish and have that dance with Peggy, or stay for not so long, a year maybe. And then he must go back, knowing that there are people who need him more, than Peggy. Of course if Steve is young, fit and tight, he won't retire. But Sam and Bucky are still with us, they're cool enough to have a TV-show.      

4. And what if like this? Shuri did the research to find a way to clear Bucky's head from the Hydra's code. What if she did? Or what if with Hydra's code some memories are gone too? Maybe Bucky could be an antagonist.

And just for me. We don't care about the money, and give Steve and Bucky the final they deserve.

1. Bucky and Steve dying fighting together. The most obvious and sad final. Till the end of the line

2. Bucky dies. It's tragic for Steve and he could say “I've lost it all”, and goes to Peggy. A little OOC, but not so bad.

3. What if we go back to that brain-cleaning option? Steve dies, but Bucky's so broken he can't stand it, and he goes to Shuri so she could wipe up his memory. Tragically and symbolically, cuz first time he was forced to forget Steve's alive, and now he does it voluntarily to forget Steve's dead.

I'm not a screenwriter, and my head's not crowded with ideas. But this is still better than what we've got in the Endgame. I could step on my own throat and accept the Endgame only if Bucky says that Steve is a traitor and he hates him. I'm not saying that Steve doesn't deserve this dance or happy ending. He does. Everybody Does. Everybody've suffered enough. But Steve doesn't deserve to become such an asshole. Bucky doesn't deserve to be forsaken in such a way. 

Honestly, I don't care about forced bromance with Sam, or Sharon, even love interest for Bucky (it would be kinda specific I guess). They could do anything, but they can't throw away Bucky and Steve. These characters are alive, their world is real. Sometimes happy ending is impossible. And if you force it, you can ruin everything. And this is what they actually did.

And it just bugs me – why, why did they do this? Maybe it's too much pressure and they screwed up. Or maybe it's Big studio' bosses. You know maybe if they just shut up about it.. time heals you know. But it gets worse. On the interview directors says one thing and screenwriters say the other, they all can't string sentense together. And only Bucky's face speaks for himself. I mean did you see this fresh Sebastian's panel at London comic-con? I’ll show you few moments, but you've got to watch the whole thing (https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=5&v=-KQpzG49exM). When he asks the audience did they like the movie, many people say “No!”, when he approves the final of Endgame one shout “Liar!”. Look at the body language. You'll see how he sincerely and emotionally talks about anything.  As soon as it comes to Endgame, he is immediately clamped, his leg begins to twitch.

The previous question was that he was interested in - what kind of heroes he wants to play. Therefore, he sits on the edge of the couch, leaning over to the public. The next question about the final and Steve going to Peggy. He immediately moves and leans back, he covers his belly with hand. The question is unpleasant to him.

Then the speech becomes confused, although before that it flowed freely, he literally gasps as if he doesn't know what to say, his micro-mimic denies his words.

He says he agrees with the final, Bucky is happy, Steve deserves it. But his body screams just the opposite - a sharp wave of his hand and chin say "no"

And this is the worst one. On the words “He (Bucky) was happy,” his whole pose just screams “NO!”. This insincere smile, this tilt of the head and a slight denying swaying. All this says more than any words

It's so obvious that he so tired of it. I bet that under the contract, he has no right to scold the movie and must promote the policy of the studio. But when he said that “Bucky was happy for Steve” .... This is the most forced smile I've ever seen. This is the most unconvincing lie in my memory. You can see just right through it, it's like an open book. But he has to do it, because crossing with the Big Studio Boss when your career just went uphill is not the best idea. The truth is important, but the dream is too. He started the career since the age of 15, which is quite long, considering this is not such a brilliant career, but he definitely worked so hard for it. So he caught between the hammer and an anvil now. On the one hand, acting career is the only thing for him, on the other hand studio bosses who can bury the dream, and on top of it the fans who are looking for his support. So "Steve is happy, Bucky is happy, awesome film, kill me, please!". By the way where is his best buddy Mackie? Why Seb's cleaning this mess all by himself? Seeing him like this just breaks my heart

And I honestly do not understand the people who liked it. How can you not see all this?? And there are those who claim that we didn’t like Endgame because we didn’t see any movies at all and didn’t read comic-books. There are Stucky fans who liked Endgame. Are the clichés so strong that people just don’t see all this... The story of Bucky and Steve was way too deep. Bucky is too tragic and well-developed character for a superhero comic-book story. All this deserved so much more. And the creators simply could not finish the job; mass cinema is simple and flat and it's made that way on purpose. They pull the most primitive triggers, so that people do not have to think. The most simple patterns help to reach more people. In other words, they are doing everything to raise more money. And it works. Thus we’ll get more of it in the future. No doubt about that.

For me, Endgame marked the victory of the corporate moneymaking machine over creativity. And the box office speaks for itself. It's an awful world to live in...

[dlamp-dictator]

Allen Rambles About Three Houses

So last week I finished up my Black Eagles playthrough of Fire Emblem Three Houses. It was... okay. It wasn’t great. I had a few issues with the pacing how quick the plot move to the final battles and the lack of build-up for the big climaxes in the last few chapters, but I had a good time overall. Still, I was left unsatisfied. Between Fates, Echoes, and even Warriors, I think I enjoyed this game the most, but also had the most uncertainty with. 

Fates was a fun game with fun mechanics and fun customization options if you were willing to grind for it, but also had the worst stories and narratives. Echoes had the best story out of the three, but had some game mechanics I really wasn’t a fan of like dungeon stamina and enemy AI nonsense. And Warriors was just fun fanservice as a fan of Dynasty Warriors, but was overall boring and repetitive after completing the story mode. 

Three Houses honestly succeeds in every category so far. It has an engaging story, fun gameplay mechanics with a lot of customization options, and a lot of fun interactions and cute moments in it. But even so, I still can’t help but have issues with it. 

So... I want to talk about that for a bit. I want to cover what I like and what I dislike about this game so far. Just talk a little bit with the fanbase to see where my feelings and thoughts are compared to everyone else’s.

But first, as always, a synopsis for those unfamiliar with Three Housed. 

Fire Emblem Three Houses is a strategy game for the Nintendo Switch and the 16th game in the franchise. This game in particular focuses on three heirs to three different nations on the continent of Fodlan. The proud and commanding Edelgard of the Adrestian Empire who has great ambitions for her nation and its people despite how radical and blasphemous her manifesto seems. The kind well-mannered Dimitri of the Holy Kingdom of Faerghus who’s smile and inviting nature hides a dark and maleficent past that still haunts and eats away at him to this day. And the easy-going and playful Claude of the Leicester Alliance who always seems to be planning something more sinister and malicious than his devil may care attitude shows. These 3 heirs all go to the same military academy at the Garreg Mach Monastery, both a religious and military center where the church resides. Together they enjoy school life, interact with students and classmates, compete in friendly competition, and learn the ways of war together. However, as political events, social changes, and possible wars erupting, the three friends are tested and eventually break part, now pointing their blades at each other for their own beliefs and goals. And as violence is all but certain as the years tick by, all the three can do is wait until they’re forced to kill each other for their beliefs, their goals, and their countries.

You play as none of these characters.

Instead, you play as Byleth, a new professor at the academy and former mercenary. You choose one of the Three Houses to teach and become wrapped up in their machinations as the plot thickens. How you train your students and ready them for the real world for the trials to come is all in your hands.

So... with that all said and the plot laid out, I think I should start with my issues first in the say way I did my quick thoughts. Just so I can at least end this on a good note after all my nitpicks and issues. 

With that said, I’m going to start small and first cover...

Things That Only Annoy Allen

So last time I tried to write this I had to make my first “small” grievance into it’s own part. I’ll try and keep this short since I really want to keep this to the actual small stuff:

I don’t like Byleth’s female design. I’ll go into detail later but for now just know the lacy stockings are distracting for the wrong reasons.

There’s no female brawling class and it bugs me greatly due to Petra’s and Ingrid’s high speed growths. They could be some extremely high DPS infantry in the right hands with those things, but there’s no really class to take advantage of that aside from maybe Swordmaster.

More for story reasons than anything, I wish there was an in-game limit to how many students you could have join your class. About 3 students per House if I had to put a number on it for reasons I’ll explain later. This isn’t an issue, but it’s something I’d like.

Magic only being accessible for certain classes bugs me. I understand the in-game reason for this as a physical unit that could use some emergency (if very weak) magic after losing weapons or fighting armored units would honestly break the game even further than it can be now, but still.

Something I might mention later, but after watching a Blue Lions playthrough by one of my favorite Let’s Players I feel that the game should had limited which House we could join first, as my Black Eagles playthrough would had been more fulfilling learning of some things I’ve learned in that Blue Lions run.

Class mastery should be tied to levels instead of as a separate experience bar. I understand why that’s done, mostly keep people from really min-maxing classes and abilities, but it’s still annoying in terms of optimization.

Edelgard, the only female lord, is the only bisexual lord. Now I’m not in the LGBTQA+ community, but as a gamer and self-proclaimed degenerate I know that denying the yaoi fangirls a male gay option for a main character is... suspicious, given the lovable bisexual rouge of Niles in Fates, and it clear that Claude could had easily been a bisexual option as well given his personality. Again, not in the LGBTQA+ community or trying to play the social justice card, but it is making me raise eyebrows toward the games marketing and aimed demographics.

Byleth in general just... bugs me as a character, but I’ll get to that later.

...

...

...

And now it’s later, so let’s get to talking about the main thing that bugs me with Three Houses, and that’s...

Byleth

I don’t like Byleth. I don’t like Byleth at all. I namely don’t like how they were executed, but the fact that we have another avatar character after how well Echoes worked as a story without a self-insert character, I’m just... baffled. I’ll try and break this down a little.

Byleth’s Design

I really don’t Byleth’s design, namely the female design. The male version looks fine, if a little too black for my tastes, but the female version is trying way too hard to look sexy. This only makes me mad because both Awakening and Fates had female avatars that didn’t look overly sexy or obviously pandering to the male gaze. They were just the female version of the male version’s outfit. Maybe there was some more boobs and hips because female, but it was mostly forgivable. 

And look, I’m not prude, far from it. Senran Kagura is one of my favorite video game series (cautiously hyped about Yumi being in Cross Tag BTW). Rumble Roses is a guilty pleasure I play every so often. One of my favorite anime is freaking Koihime, aka ‘Ikkitousen but better EVERYONE is a girl.’ I’m not saying you can’t have a sexy character or a bunch of sexy characters in a game or piece of media. However, that character should at least have a sexy personality to go with it. And with Byleth, who has the personality of cardboard has been with her mercenary father all her life fighting for her life, it doesn’t feel like she would actively be trying to look sexy since she doesn’t have the personality for it, or a personality at all. She looks less like a mercenary or teacher and more like Manuela forced her into some lacy stockings to make her branch out...

Huh, that would be a good paralogue/support conversation, but I’m not about to rewrite the game just for my satisfaction... yet.

 If you want my quick armchair redesign ideas in terms of design I’d just stick her in Male Byleth’s armor, maybe have a more pronounced/noticeable skirt instead of a long shirt, and dear God get rid of those lacy stockings. Byleth is suppose to be a mercenary that’s only known battle with her father, the Ashen Demon that rarely shows their emotions, not a sexy fashion model. The Enlightened One model is it’s own mess, but this section ate up enough of my time already so I’m moving on.

Byleth’s Personality

Again, Byleth having the personality of a damn rock really kills my attachment to the character. They don’t speak or emote beyond generic level up phrases and crit quotes. 

Which is a shame because Byleth has some really good crit quotes. 

However, from what Jeralt and other students say about Byleth I can gather that their someone that’s often quiet and standoffish. They don’t speak unless prompted to or needs to interject. They tend to observe more than act, even more so after they gain the ability to rewind time, but have a razor-sharp and deadly focus when in combat. And despite their distant nature, they do care about their students, friends, and family quite a lot, willing to break the emotionless Ashen Demon persona to crack a smile even now and then, even completely showing deadpan shock when something surprising or appalling is said, as rare as it happens. 

This is literally Yu Narukami’s personality in Persona 4 the Animation.

And that anime not only gave Yu Narukami more agency and personality than the self-insert the game made him out as, it also gave him a lot of a good back-and-forth with his friends and cast at large. 

Seriously, this could had been Byleth if they bothered to let them speak and actively interact more independently, and it would had been great.

But that aside, I’m moving on to something a little more important, which is...

Byleth’s Importance

[Spoilers for the Black Eagles Route Ahead] 

Again, I’ve only played the Black Eagle’s route, so maybe this changes in the other Houses, but Byleth seems way too important for his own good when we have 3 other “main” characters. He’s the crux of a lot of events and it doesn’t feel deserved or built up to well enough. In the Black Eagle’s path, you’re the one that convinces the class to work with Edelgard instead of Edelgard just explaining herself before the class of her goals. You’re the one leading the Black Eagle Strike Force instead of Edelgard or Hubert taking command and leading after years of not having the professor around and having to survive the war on their own. You’re the one that Rhea has a personal vengeance for instead of the woman that torn the church apart with both words of steel and blades of iron. And you just randomly find out that your the progenitor god from Edelgard and Hubert toward the very end. It feels really anti-climactic, but I also get the feeling that we were suppose to play Edelgard’s route last, something I’ll save for later. 

Among other things, I just feel that the focus on Byleth stagnants Edelgard’s character a lot. I want to see Edelgard struggle with the fact that her ideals, while noble in concept, are dragging the world in the flames of war and that she’s seen more as a tyrant than a savior, but instead we focus on Byleth’s mysterious birth and power after being gone for five years. This game, at least on the Black Eagle route, was so damn close to telling a really good war drama, but backpedals due to Byleth’s existence and perceived importance.

Sothis

[Spoilers for Mid-Game Ahead]

I wish she was more active in the story. Nothing too big, but if I had to deal with emotionless rock that is Byleth, I’d like to have seen Sothis sprinkling her commentary on everything they did. Just imagine Sothis sassing Byleth about how their always eat lunch with their students. Her commenting on the fish they catch. Her giving additional small hints about who owns certain lost items after failing so many times to give the right item to someone. Her sassing every student in their support with Byleth on C-rank. Her telling you to go to sleep when you run out of activity points. It’d add a lot to her character and it’d make the moment later in the game when you no longer have her voice around feel more impactful. Imagine catching a big fish after fusing with her and... hearing nothing about it how big a catch it was. Imagine trying to give Ingrid a lost sword for the fifth time, hoping to hear a hint from Sothis and... you hear nothing.

Again, just an armchair idea, but at least that way when Byleth is being a plank of wood we’ll have Sothis to add some literal flavor text to everything they do.

Ah, but that’s enough about Byleth, let’s move on to something a little more important. Like... 

The Gameplay

Thankfully, my issue with the gameplay are more nitpicks if anything, and I can actually have this in list form too.

As I mentioned in my quick thoughts, I feel like late-game/master classes are more of a pain to gain than most others. A lot of them need to have some heavy grinding in a stat you didn’t likely need to worry about before. Mortal Savant requires you to heavily grind either a physical class in magic or a magical class in swords, something that you likely didn’t do. Speaking of magic, it’s annoying that for all the customization in this game only certain classes can use magic. It makes raising a Mortal Savant or a more physical Holy/Dark Knight a nightmare. Again, I understand why this was done, but it’s annoying all the same.

Gender-restrictions, as I also said in my Quick Thoughts, are just dumb. Fates had removed this and it was great to have the freedom to give my male units the ability to become Falcon Knights, or my Female units to be... Okay, I only played Fates and Echoes, but the fact still remains that not being able to make a female Grappler/War Master or a male Falcon Knight really sucks and limits me quite a bit. Especially the inability to make Lysithea a Dark Mage. It’s practically wrong. 

A lot of these maps have the same issue that Echoes had. They’re big and have a lot of enemies, but not much creativity to them. Okay, they have some thought put into them, more than Echoes anyway, but a lot of them still just feel like big fields that need at least three flying units to be manageable. Again, I’ve only played the Black Eagle route so there might be some more interesting maps in the other routes, but from what I’ve played there was no real strategy to these maps outside of baiting enemies and maneuvering around traps. I think there were probably only two maps that weren’t giant mazes or an empty field with a lot of enemies in them.

To the point above, this made slow moving armored classes almost completely useless. What point is there in having a slow tank on maps that span to what feels like 60X60 tile maps? Plus the maze-like design? Yeah, I don’t know how these maps were meant to be interesting.

And that’s it for gameplay issues. Moving on to...

The Story

Again, something that can be put into list form due to the story having more nitpicks than actual issues:

[Spoilers for Black Eagles Route Ahead]

The split decision to join Edelgard or not is dumb, as is the requirement to have the option available. I think it’s foolish to think we wouldn’t agree with her after listening to her manifesto for so long, especially if you played a Blue Lions route and seeing how Sylvain and Ingrid were screwed over due to their Crests, or just... Lysithea’s  background in general. I can’t argue with her beliefs, only her execution.

The Flame Emperor reveal was... really anti-climatic. As if, again, they assumed we’d do Black Eagles last. Playing this route first just leads to a lot of anti-climatic reveals, especially on Edelgard’s route.

I just really wish Edelgard came clean with her classmates and commanders at some point in the story, to just tell them all that she was experimented on as a child and had two Crests as a result. That she wants to eliminate the nobility and Crests as a symbol of statu because of the harm it does to people both on top and on the bottom of the social food chain. It’d give a lot more weight to her cause.

Again, most of my issues with the story come from Byleth having too much screen time and importance compared to Edelgard as a whole. Especially when I did the route where I chose to go with her.

Alright, I think that’s it for all of my nitpicks, all the major ones anyway. I think I finally move to...

The Good Things

Again, this will be in list form since a lot of the nicer parts about this game don’t need as much breakdown as the bad parts.

But anyway...

As much as I don’t find the late game reward in terms of class advancement, the mid and early game are great for experimentation. I've had a bunch of fun on my second playthrough with some creative builds. I might suffer a little in the late game due to not optimizing everything, but that’s managable.

As I also stated in my quick thoughts, dismounting is hilariously broken. The amazing amount of utility you get from being about to dismount once you reach a destination and then mount at the start of the new turn for free while also being safe from arrows and horse-effective weapons is hysterical. I honestly think this was a bug that just didn’t patch and that dismounting meant you were stuck with the lower movement for the rest of the turn, but God am I going to use it until they eventually patch it out.

I’ve got... issues with the Black Eagle route, at least the route I went through, but I’ve been watching a playthrough of the Blue Lions route and it’s everything I could have wanted in a Fire Emblem game and more. If you want to play a good story I recommend the Blue Lions as your first route.

But to cut the Black Eagles route some credit, a lot of Edelgard and Hubert’s A-Supports were probably some of the best I’ve seen in the series... though I’ve only played Fates and Echoes, so...

Speaking of supports all of them were done very well. Like I said, Edelgard and Hubert had great supports, but Lysithea, Petra, Caspar, and Dorothea had great supports as well.

A lot of the supports and voice acting are great. It’s a key reason as to why I like the supports so much. The Lords are especially great to hear and were directed well.

And... yeah, that’s all the good things. Don’t let the short length fool you, folks. Like I said before, my issues are more nitpicks. The game as a whole is just fine.

That said...

In the Future

As much as I want to, even as a fun little project, I think it’s a little arrogant of me to be making any rewrites or “improvement” to the current story of Three Houses. I have various reasons for this that I might go into depth to in a later Rambling, but the short version is as someone that’s struggle to write their own story I feel like a hypocrite for trying to “correct” another’s. However, I think it’s far game to make requests and bring forth ideas for a future title, especially since this one is selling so well. And so, before concluding I’d like to present a few things I hope to be in the next Fire Emblem game:

No Avatar Character

Like I said, I feel Byleth’s entire presence can ruin scenes due to his lack of personality and engagement. And as easy as it would be to give him one that would also mean the play losing their use self-insert character. To this I say it’s probably best to just not have an avatar/self-insert character to begin with. You can easily make a character that has the stats of an above-average all-rounder as your main character/lord while still having a personality. I think Echoes did this well enough with Alm and Celica, especially Celica if we’re talking stats and utility as a healer/magic/swordsman hybrid.

No Gender-Locked Classes

This is more of a personal desire than something that needs to happen, but if the next Fire Emblem game is going to give us this much customization then I’d really like to have complete control and not be restricted by gender, especially when we’re talking stats. A War Master Hilda would be wild. As would a Hero Petra, a Gremory Linhardt, a Dark Mage Lythesia, and so on. To restrict us is not only screwing people who want to make quirky builds, but also those that want to make optimal builds. Either remove the gender lock, or have these characters with more straight-forward classes like in Fates.

One/Limited Routes

Again, I haven’t played Blue Lions or Golden Deer yet, but the Black Eagles route had a branching path that I honestly think shouldn’t have existed. Maybe this was for reasons I can only guess at, but the story of the Black Eagles Route I was on felt very rushed, or at least it assumed I had played either the other Houses or the “canon” Black Eagles route first. That left the actual story, while I personally found engaging, very rushed and underwhelming at the end. In the future I’m hoping for either one path, or for alternate paths to be locked until you complete the other “main” ones that give a fuller story, because a lot of what I’m seeing in the Blue Lions playthrough I’m watching would had been nice to learn in the Black Eagles route to see Edelgards view of things.

Smaller Maps

Like I said, the maps in Three Houses are a little too large, especially with slower armored/magic units in the early game with only 4 movement. In the next game I’m hoping for either smaller maps or at least maps that accommodate for that slow movement of early game and saving the bigger maps for when you’d naturally have some cavalry and infantry units with 5 movement. I think Fates’ Conquest and Revelations maps did this perfectly.

Brawling Weapons

No real critique here. I just really like the gauntlets and I hope they come back in the next game.

Conclusion

Overall, I think Three Houses is a good game, despite all my nitpicks. I hope the next game will be even better and hopefully have some of the things I want to see. I recommend this for anyone with a Switch wanting to play a decent strategy game.

Anyway, I got a draft to make on that story I’m writing, as well as draft up another Rambling. See you all later!

[discomelody]

I guess Portugal is Antiva now...

   Synopsis:  Marina is a portuguese gamer girl completely obssessed with Dragon Age. She has never fell in love and fears any intimate contact due to her trauma. Until one day when she fells through an eluvian which throws her in Thedas. Will she be able to overcome her traumas? Stay tuned and find out! M!HawkeXMarina or FenrisXMarina or AndersXMarina 

                           Chapter I- This isn’t my college!

A group of silver armored guards is dragging a dwarf, they enter a large stone building and throw him to a mahogany chair. The dwarf tries to sit up and he cleans blood off his mouth. When he sees a female shadow coming from the darkness of the poorly lit room.

“I’ve had gentler invitations”, sighs the dwarf while guards are surrounding him.

The woman comes out from the shadows and reveals herself, “I am Cassandra Pentaghast, seeker of the Chantry.”

He reclines himself on the chair and smirks “And just... what are you seeking?”

The stoic woman gets closer to him and makes her intentions known, “The champion and the Seer.”

“Which one?”, teases the dwarf.

The women loses her patience, gets dangerously close to him and points her sword to his neck. “You know exactly why I’m here! Time to start talking dwarf. They tell me you’re good at it.”, she threatens him.

The dwarf raises his hands in surrender and in a more serious tone finally asks her “What do you want to know?”

“Everything. Start at the beginning.”, she sheathes her sword.  

The dwarf starts telling the story of the champion Eddard Hawke, and how he bravely destroyed everything in his way, with his sword and shield, alongside his siblings. Until a high dragon appeared on the top of the hill, admiring his work.

"Bullshit. That’s not what really happened! And what about her? Where is she in your story?", asks Cassandra exasperated with his lies.

"Does that not match the story you’ve heard, Seeker?", says the dwarf quite pleased with himself.

"I’m not interested in stories. I came to hear the truth.", the seeker starts getting mad once again.

"What makes you think I know the truth?", he says trying to change the conversation.

"Don’t lie to me! You knew them even before they were the Champion and The Seer!", she stabs a knife into the book the dwarf is holding.

"Even if I did, I don’t know where they are now.", the dwarf caresses the book fondly as if he's remembering them.

"Do you have any idea what’s at stake here?", sighs sadly the seeker.

"Let me guess: your precious Chantry’s fallen to pieces and put the entire world on the brink of war? And you need the only people that can help you put it back together.", he closes the book quite mad.

"They were at the heart of it when it all began. If you can’t point me to them, tell me everything you know.", she begs.

"You aren’t worried I’ll just make it up as I go?", the dwarf says quite surprised by her will.

"Not at all.", she says and she crosses her arms.

"You’ll need to hear the whole story.", he puts himself comfortable and he starts his greatest tale."The Blight had been unleashed on Ferelden. Darkspawn poured out of the wilds, clashing against the army at the ruins of Ostagar. The battle was a disaster. King Cailan died on the field with his men, betrayed by his most trusted general. Unopposed, the horde marched on the village of Lothering. The village burned and many innocents were slaughtered. The Champion’s family barely escaped in time, but while they were escaping, they saved the one you know as the Seer now, even though she was the one that saved them more. She wasn’t always as powerful and renowned as you may think. Before all this, she was just a poor innocent girl from a foreign land, called Marina…”

Marina POV

"I'm late! Oh boy, I'm so late for class! Madame Martin will kill me! As if she doesn't hate me already. Why is it raining?! I hate this!"

While I'm running in my green parka and on my probably drenched black converse, I see what seems like a really big white wolf. I must be seeing things. It's just probably a big husky. Oh well, finals and the rain do that to you. The poor dog must be drenched. As I try to come near him, he runs away.  

"Come here sweetheart, I won't hurt you.", I try to coax him but he keeps running. Might as well follow him, I probably missed the most of the class by now. "Wait! Don't go!"

He runs away and I follow him throughout Lisbon's university campus until he turns to an alley. When I reach the alley, the dog is no longer there but a really intricate mirror stands in his place. It's black and it's decorated with vines and flowers.

"Weird. This mirror seems familiar. But where have I seen it before?", I tap my chin with my small chubby hand in thought. "Oh well, might as well touch it. It's so beautiful."

As I touch it, the mirror starts emitting a green light and starts pulling me, " Wait! No! Help! I don't want to go!". I try to stop myself from being pulled but the unknown force is too strong and soon I'm entirely absorbed into a dark abyss. I only hear a really familiar female voice: "I found you, young seer." After that, I pass out.

In Thedas

Hawke's POV

"Keep running mother, we can do this.", I run while supporting my mother with my arm while Bethany and Carver are taking care of the small Darkspawn that were left.

"Where are we running to?", asks Bethany out of breath while she's holding her sceptre. "Anyplace is better than here.", grumbles Carver while he slashes the last one.

" We lost everything your father and I had built. Everything.", mother leaves my arm and cleans her tears.

As we are recovering our strength to keep running, I hear Bethany scream:  "Hawke, there is a girl passed out near the sea. Darkspawn are going in her direction! We have to help her!", she points towards a body seemingly close to us. We quickly run towards it and start slashing and burning the group of harlocks.

"Mother! See if she is alright! We'll take care of this!", I leave her and she goes towards the body. She kneels near it and realizes it's a young girl around the same age as her younger children. "You poor thing. What happened to you? Where is your family?", mother tries to check on her and realizes the girl is wearing really strange clothes.

Soon enough we finish the beasts and we rush towards mother. "Is she alright, mother?”, Bethany asks quite worried.

"She's drenched, her clothes are definitely not fereldan and she seems antivan due to her tanned complexion. Besides all that, she's only passed out and she's breathing evenly. Perhaps she's victim of a shipwreck.", mother looked at us.

"Thank the Maker.", says Bethany, quite relieved.

"We can't leave her here. She would be slaughtered by Darkspawn. We'll take her with us.", I said quite confidently. I don't know why but something was telling me I should protect her. I grabbed her in my arms in bride style and we kept walking.

"Don't you think we have enough to worry about?", Carver asked angrily.

"We are taking her, Carver. We can't leave the poor girl here. She's alone and has no one, unlike you.", I said rather defensively to my brother. He shut up and turned his head towards the ground, ashamed of his words.

As we keep walking, I inspect her closely in my arms. She's quite… cute, actually. She has dark brown wavy hair, in a disheveled updo and looks quite curvy. I wonder what color her eyes are? As I finish observing her, I realize she really is wearing weird clothes. I have never seen pants so tight and this coat thingy she's wearing is quite peculiar. Oh well, it doesn't matter. As I finish looking at her, she moves in my arms and cuddles closer to my chest.

"Mãe? Pai? Não me deixem! Por favor!", She cries while she sleeps. As I hear her cries I promise myself I'll protect her with all I have. Suddenly we see a couple, a woman warrior and a Templar. They are fighting Darkspawn, but the man looks quite injured. We rush to help them and Bethany and Carver kill the last ones.

" Are you alright? ", mother asks them.

 "Two mages! I cannot...hgh", the man points towards Bethany and the girl in my arms, and holds his bleeding side. I guess you're a mage too, little antivan.

"Wesley! They helped us. Can't you turn a blind eye to them?", the woman said as she holds him.

"I guess I can...hgh ", he painfully said.

"Come with us, we could use another sword.", I said.  

"I'll help you.", she said. "I'm Aveline and this is my husband Wesley", she introduced herself. "I'm Hawke, this is my mother Leandra, my brother Carver and my sister Bethany. This girl in my arms, we don't know.  We saved her from Darkspawn some minutes ago.”

"Nice to meet you, let's be on our way.", Aveline nodded in our direction and helped her husband walk. We kept our path and when we reached the center of a slope, we noticed we were surrounded by Darkspawn. We started walking to some rocks and I put the girl down near them and Aveline left her husband near her.

"Wesley stay with her while we fight them.", Aveline begged her husband. I left the girl in his and my mother’s care, while we fought the Darkspawn. As I slashed and bashed them with my shield, they seemed to never end. Suddenly an Ogre goes in Bethany's direction and I scream scared for her life.

" Bethany! Watch out!", I try to reach her but she isn't turning quick enough. As I start fearing for her life, I hear someone shout.

 Marina's POV

Aw, my head, where am I? This isn't my college! As I open my eyes, I look around me and see… Leandra and Wesley from Dragon Age II?! They are kneeled next to me, looking at Hawke fighting alongside his siblings and Aveline.  As I scrub my eyes and pinch myself wondering if this is all a dream, I realize it isn't.

Suddenly, I see an Ogre coming towards Bethany! I've always felt useless when It came to this part of the game and I couldn't save her. Not today! I must do something, but what? Perhaps if I call him to attention, it will give enough time for Bethany to run. So, I do the only thing I can do right now: I scream.

"NO!”, I kneel and reach my hand towards her. Everyone turns their eyes towards me for a second, when we hear a roar from the skies. Is that Flemeth?! Oh boy, it is! She will kill the Ogre. Flemeth burns every Darkspawn in her way and throws the Ogre out of the cliff. Thank god, they are all ok!

But why am I in Dragon Age II? This can't be happening! This must be a dream. As the dragon turns into Flemeth, and strances in my direction while she talks to Hawke to make a deal with him. Suddenly, she gets close to me and speaks:

"This isn't a dream, young seer. You've got more power than you think. When you finally accept it, come to Sundermount and I'll teach you." Flemeth turns towards Hawke "Protect her. She will be useful to you and she will be very important for your story.", she glances at me once again and leaves, in her dragon form.

As she leaves, everyone gets closer to me, looking amazed and some even scared at what I had done.

Bethany gets closer to me and thanks me, "Thank you so much! You saved my life."

As I start panicking, everyone starts questioning me about my whereabouts and my "powers". I finally look at Hawke. Oh my god! it's Eddard Hawke, the character I created in my game. He glances at me and smiles in my direction. He has beautiful blue eyes, black wavy hair, some facial hair and he was tall, with a strong build. As I inspect his physique, he talks in a really deep, yet kind voice:

"Guess I was right, you’re really something else, little Antivan."

Besides his words, there was only one thing in my mind at the moment: Well shit, why did I made you so hot?!

Chapter I End

[jonathanraychapman]

Remembering Ultima Online

When I was in junior college (I spent two years at the local community college before the state university), I used to hang out over at a friend’s house  This was someone I met in high school.  He and his other friends had started to play Ultima Online on his new Gateway 2000.  I didn’t really have any close friends growing up (especially not ones that could come over) so this was sort of a new era in my life (where being social was a possibility).  Before that, I tended to read and play PC games by myself - cut off from the rest of the world and completely offline.

By that time I was already an established PC gamer (but not with deep knowledge of games) since my mom bought me a IBM compatible one of her coworkers had built - probably when I was 12 (complete with dual 5.25-inch floppy drives).   We weren’t rich by any stretch of the imagination and my first PC was really the second-hand cast-off from her coworker - who had upgraded as an enthusiast.  I became an hobbyist myself and my birthday money and part-time job earnings quickly went into new rigs.  By the time I entered college, I had scrounged and bought a AMD 300 Mhz K6-2 with a 8mb Matrox Millennium graphics card and probably 16mb of memory.  I mostly just played older games (by that point) like Quake and Doom.

Meanwhile - across the road from my parent’s house - they had built a new Walmart supercenter with its own software section (which was kind of amazing since our whole town had less than 1800 people).  Instead of driving over an hour away to get PC games at the mall (at a Babbages) or borrow a physical copy from someone at school, I had access right there to somewhat-modern games and magazines about them (specifically magazines with demos).

The first RPG game I bought over there (my first RPG games were the Gold Box TSR/SSI games) was Ultima IX: Ascension.  It was a really poor purchase and it ran terribly on my rig (which I’ve read was probably for pretty much everyone).  At this point I wasn’t nostalgic for Ultima because I hadn’t really played it so I returned it.  Walmart didn’t even want to take it back because of it having been opened - though eventually we worked that out (it was defective in my eyes).  I hadn’t yet caught the Diablo 2 bug and so when my friends suggested I go back over there and buy the new Ultima Online (the same series as the game I had just returned) I was a bit skeptical - especially because we didn’t even have dial-up internet at the time.

But after sitting over at my friend’s house and seeing how this game (Ultima Online Second Age) played out for him, I was hooked.  It also helped that that midi sound from this game was just amazing in this game (just the character creation screen was awesome).  And the lack of Internet at my house wasn’t really a problem either as it turned out.  Though it might have been a bit unethical, a phone number and password was passed around between friends and that became my internet access as well.  The fact it was 56K modem (and probably less than that given the copper wiring in the house and poles) wasn’t really an issue since this game was simple as far as controls and graphics.  But the internet was bad to just cut out at times - leading to many in-game deaths (and heart-stopping moments).

Certainly for such a primitive-looking game, the imagination greatly assisted in making Ultima Online an immersive experience.  When it was 2am in the morning, having your newbie account being attacked by a bear or an Orc Mage would put you on edge (heart racing as you tried everything to win or run away). 

This game also introduced me to this pattern (especially with MMOs.. Everquest, Star Wars, etc) that carried on through my college years of friends getting me into a game, but at a point where they were much too high level or too aloof to play with me.  So I really ended up playing Ultima Online alone instead of it being the group experience I had hoped for.  I was still having a good time playing it, but it was just so hard to coordinate with local players at that time in my life that I decided to just not try to.  After all, I was using the only form of outside communication in the house as my conduit into the Internet.  There were no cell phones at that time for us.  If you needed to call someone, you had to sign off of the modem and get back a dial-tone to call them on the landline.  And, if you wanted to reach them at home, they also had to not be using their phone line for Internet or you’d just get a busy signal.  We had ICQ at that time, but it only helped so much (both parties had to be online for example).

I spent most of my time in this game leveling up and wandering the coastline above town.  I went around, finding reagents and using them to practice spellcraft.  This was all made harder by being killed by NPCs (Orc Mages were notorious), bears, and then there were the worst -  PK’ers (Player-Killers).  

A little aside about PK’ing.  If everything was well and good and fair, this wouldn’t be so bad, but in Ultima Online, these villains were quite the scourge on the aspiring newcomer.  First of all, you had to run all the way back to town to be resurrected if there was no good player around to resurrect you.  When you died, your items would all remain on your body (at this point you were a ghost).  The PK’er could loot your body for any items they wanted - leaving your body to rot.  This meant that by the time you got back to your body, your items were probably gone (evaporated into the digital ether).  But not only that; the PK’er might just be hidden nearby and they might murder you a second-time - using your body as the bait to bring you back.  PK’ers were the ultimate trolls in this game - getting their fun by causing you misery.  Sometimes players (especially new players) would just give up on the game altogether because of this.  Now if you were close to a town, you could call out GUARD and if there was a guard in proximity they would show up and pretty much immediately execute the PK’er.  I can assure you that this never happened.  These killers were experienced in the game and would never position themselves close enough for that to occur.

Eventually - while out in the middle of nowhere - I found a kind, trusting stranger that let me have a key to her house (and access to her food) so I could work on crafting and not lose everything - just the items on my person - when I died.  I only played this character so eventually I became pretty powerful as a wizard (I believe my spells and swordsmanship were both above 90/100).  Typically my style was to cast spells and run back (which eventually was termed ‘kiting’) while wearing little or no armor (just a helmet and a robe) to recover mana.  After casting spells, I’d equip a halberd to deliver the final blow.  Over time I had to travel to dungeons and fight higher-level monsters to even gain anything stat-wise.

I had joined my friend’s guild - even though I didn’t hang out with them most of the time - given how difficult it was to arrange.  Joining up was more out of friendship than any advantage.  And - by that point - I was every bit their equals as far as combat (though we had went different tracts).  By that point, I had even defended myself against some PK’ers by that time (using their own techniques against them - given that my play style was the same as theirs - nuking with spells, running, repeating, and then delivering the kill blows with a halberd).  I was happy that the guild i joined had bought a house at that time and my friend was a pretty good blacksmith (actually smithing was how he raised funds) so that was also a perk.  But neither perk was really great for me.  I spent most of the time away in dungeons or storing my loot at that lady’s house that I had met earlier.

So - to continue my story - one rainy afternoon (IRL) I get a phone call.  It’s my friend and he and his guild needed my help online in the game (which it was my duty to provide given our affiliation).  The plot?.. Well enough is enough and they’re going to raid a guild of player-killers up the path a ways from Britain.  I certainly needed no more motivation.  Given my previous difficulties, I was absolutely livid about these jerks in my game.  He wants everyone to meet up at the guild-house (right outside the edge of the city limits) and then we’d ride up there together to attack.  I didn’t have a horse (given that I just usually teleport or walk everywhere), but he says he’s got one for me to borrow.  So at that point I’m in.

The four of us talk strategy in chat.  My friend - the leader - is playing a traditional fighter/tank character (with a high/maxed healing skill - using bandages to recover HP on himself and others).  He’s done some reconnaissance beforehand.  The evil guild up north has been positioned by the roadside and has been hiding and then waylaying travelers - looting all their items (but really just murdering newbies for lulz).  The gang is filled with real, logged-in players who use alt accounts to keep themselves supplied - as the game won’t let you come to town as a murderer.  They’re well outside of town limits, so calling guards is no use up there.  And the gang uses a local house to run back and hide in if there’s trouble.  The game won’t let people rush in their house if they’ve locked the door.  On top of that, they can banish you from their house by typing and then selecting your sprite.  You’re immediately transported outside and can not enter again or approach the step (kind of like legends about vampires - only you’re the vampire here with the invisible barrier preventing entry).  

Given these villains are traditional PK’ers (already leveled-up characters with a certain skillset used for murder), they are attired and skilled much like myself - with little armor and with a heavy polearm (relying on magic to quickly take down enemies before being hurt).  Their hit-and-run tactics works well-enough normally - against single travelers - but against four adventurers on horses they need their spells to do massive damage to have a chance.  All together we launch an assault out of nowhere, riding up there on horseback.  Though they're hidden (waiting for new targets, hidden among the skeletons of the newly-killed on the roadside), this assault catches them off-guard and, in the end, there are only two of them logged on at the time.  They initially break their cover with the hopes of winning before realizing they’re outnumbered.  They attempt to run and hide, but I reveal them with the namesake spell - letting the others continue the assault.  

Again they fall back and blast some spells in retaliation, but it’s no use.  We overpower them - using healing to tank the damage while disrupting their spell-casting by attacking and the PK’ers are soon out of mana.  On top of that, from the back-line I hit them with a energy bolt as they run.  This is where things get interesting.  In a fit of panic, one runs into their nearby house as he’s pursued.  My friend rushes right in after him.  This takes away his option of locking the door.  As he’s probably typing in the command to banish a player (which is fairly quick to accomplish), my friend strikes him dead inside the doorway.  

So - after we finish the pursuit - there we are - inside the bandit house with an unlocked door - with no-one alive now to banish us outside.  And it gets better.  Normally in the game you can lock down items so that no-one can remove them from your house.  These players hadn’t done that (because they relied on the locked door).  So it’s a veritable cave of wonders in there with everything for the taking. And apparently this PK’er’s alt account is a grandmaster blacksmith and he stores his extra goods in the house (to share with his accounts and guildmates).  When you’re a grandmaster blacksmith in this game, your name is visible in text on the armor and swords you make.  So pretty soon we’re all stocked up with the guy’s armor and weapons (I believe I took some armor made from a green-colored ore).  I’d taken all the stored food and spell reagents I could find.  There wasn’t any gold in there (because they kept that in the bank), but anything that wasn’t nailed down (sitting in chests) we took.  

There’s no downside here (not even a moral one).  After all, looting the body of a murderer is allowed without karma loss.  There’s also no karma loss for picking up items out of chests.  The PK’er is probably a ghost there, screaming at us to no avail.  He can’t get resurrected with that login in town because he’s a murderer.  He could log in with his alt account, but that takes time.  It’s over and we’ve won.  Later, we spotted the alt account near the bank in town (because it was the name on the armor).  Whenever we’d see that guy, we’d always go over and thank him for the awesome armor we had on (the joke being that he hadn’t exactly given it to us).  He’d just leave town or type something that the game would mask as gibberish (i.e. curse-words).

So this was one of my more-fun adventures (and really my only adventure with my local friends and their guild) and really the beginning of the end for me playing it.  Shortly after this we all went our separate ways.  I continued my schooling elsewhere, found Diablo 2 (and the expansions), and lost many many hours playing that game online.  Maybe I’ll write about our Neverwinter Nights adventures some other time.

[overfedvenison]

More SMT nocturne diary! I did some of this on the weekend...

---

I ascended to the top of the Obelisk and met with my Teacher from before the conception. As I hadn't seen her for the entire game, I wasn't quite sure what I was expecting...

Surprisingly, she was fine. She expressed regret about the conception, saying how she believed that the world would be recreated in a state where people would be happy to be alive. In the old world, they simply stagnated... People lost the need to improve themselves and compete.

She expressed the feeling that Hikawa was simply using her. He told her she would be the pillar of the new world - A pun, the pillar of the obelisk she rested upon is literally channeling energy for the new world. I'm not sure if that existed in the Japanese version. But she said it's not too late - We can still change the fate of the world.

It looked like she was developing her own reason, but actually gave herself up to a god 'Even Hikawa didn't know about:' Arcada. Her body turned into a vessel for it, and she told us cryptic things about fighting for a reason. Through it all, I got an important bit of information: A demon cannot make a reason, ourselves included. So we must champion one.

After she disappeared, Lucifer appeared in his child form... Apparently, the world will soon be recreated, and all those with reasons will soon go to war. I came back at an interesting time, it seems.

Mechanically, the god blessed us with two additional demon slots. But now I'm left without a clear direction, left to wander to find my reason...

---

I decided to examine the Mannikin City, to see if Futomimi had developed a reason... His ideals seemed juvenile: A world where mannikins could live in peace and have nice lives. Unlike others, which had a wide variety of high ideologies - A rejection of unnecessary things where the powerful are chosen for greatness, an isolationist society where you can do anything but are forced to rely on yourself, etc, Futomimi basically just wanted Mannikin Liberation. He seemed to have no real idea what to found a world on, really, which ties in with Mannikins are being "Flatter" than humans with more of a surface-level understanding and ideals.

I'm curious to see his conclusion. As I went to the place where he was metitating, various Mannikins told me had had already left. So, to the Mannikin Village...

Hijiri was waiting for me there, and congratulated me on stopping the flow of Magatsuchi. Hikawa won't be able to make his move for a while, and the Nightmare System is disabled now that the Maiden is removed from it. He dropped some lore on me... - To make a new world, you need a strong idea of what you want to create. A "Reason" - To acquire a reason, you need divine protection from a god. You need a large amount of Magatsuhi to summon a god. (Does our teacher thus already have a reason? Or does she represent Hikawa's completed reason?) - Isamu is currently in the Alama Network, if we want to go find him

I went off to find Isamu, as the manikin village hadn't changed. This was another trek through the Alama Network...

---

The boss there was the same spectre as the last time I was in the network - Very clever! The trick here is that he drains your MP to deliver a very powerful attack, and summons a total of six clones of himself... He's also immune to the four basic elements.

I saw the trick: I went in with almost-empty MP and spent the first rounds debuffing his attack, then spamming Poison Arrows to deal damage against all the enemies, healing with items, and attacking. (First use for poison arrows, honestly.)

Once he started simply attacking us, I summoned proper allies to finish him off

---

Afterward, I found Isamu... He had absorbed the souls in the Amala Network and grown powerful from them - And developed the reason of Musubi.

He says he has stopped caring entirely about others. The way he sees it, the way the world works is that others don't notice him and he doesn't notice others. Ultimately, everyone is at the center of their own world, and he wants to make this more explicit in his vision of the new world - A new universe where everyone can create their own world, regardless of what others think.

I agreed that his general philosophy has appeal, at least in the sense that I know where he's coming from. I said the same thing to the previous Reason I found. He responded "You can't please everyone, and shouldn't bother trying to." And said that he stopped blaming me for failing to help him find the teacher, or escape the prison, or anything else.

I can see the rationale: You are at the center of your own world. From that perspective, there is no incentive to help others. Likewise, you should expect no help -from- others... Blaming others for not helping you is a flaw of character, and the only person you can depend on is yourself. If you want something to happen, it's entirely on you to do so - Alone. And, presumably, you shouldn't care about what others think, or let their opinions effect your own life.

The path to Isamu has you meet a Shadow who parrots his phrases... "Society didn't reject me, I reject society." "To be strong is to be solitary." Things like that. He accepts you and lets you inside only if you -don't- try to convince him to let you by.

Musubi... Seems to evoke the outcasts of society, people who detest having to alter themselves for others and have been let down by society. As much as it is about the virtues of isolationism and a self-directed life, it comes from a place not out of anything constructive, but of a rejection of a society that has burned and let down many people.

It seems to be very forward-thinking and prescient in it's delivery for a 10 year old game -  The Alama Network is very much a fantasy equivalent to the internet, and it is through that Isamu was able to get his voice out and gain power and supporters for an movement isolationist on a personal level. Isamu's grand scheme has been called a "NEET paradise" by some gamers for good reason, and it's overall essence seems very similar to a lot of recent internet movements.

---

I went back to Shibuya and decided to try fighting Mara, a bonus boss in the back of the strip mall on a full moon. Mara is incorrectly summoned as a slime by some manikins, and has only 2300 HP but fully heals each turn. I was able to win by lowering his defense and attacking as best I could the round after Sarutahiko hit with a Retaliate (a counter that does huge damage.)

For my trouble, I got the Muspell magatama - and the knowledge that Baphomet speaks bleating every word with an A in it.

---

I found Hikawa at the old Mantra building... He says he was impressed by my strength, the power of the demi-fiend, and explained his own ideals.

"Man's greed is like a fire. When it is small, it is warm and comfortable. But fire eventually grows into flames, devouring everything in it's path. Mankind grew to covet fire. Humans became dependent on it's warmth, and averted their eyes from it's destructive nature."

"Humans should serve the world. By doing so, a life of repose would in turn be promised to them. What is desirable, what is undesirable... It's not man that makes that distinction... It is the world."

"Humans should be beacons of light in that world. The light spins quietly-- Sometimes bright, sometimes dim-- Becoming one with the world. That is the ideal way of life. Don't you agree, that the world should be ruled by serenity?"

Essentially, he's arguing in favour of a purpose. Greed, in small doses, is something that pushes you forward. But a society can't be built on greed... Humans need to serve a structure, a greater purpose, and bend to it's will - A higher purpose inexorably linked with the will of the world. As long as you dutifully serve this higher purpose, you will have a good life.

On the face of it, this is phrased in a way that's setting off red flags... But I suppose these all were. "Rule by serenity" sounds sinister, but the idea that mankind should be serving a purpose to the world does seem to have merit. I... Very hesitantly agreed to this outlook, as well as all the others. He said he'd get me when time is appropriate.

Those are our three Reasons so far... One of cutting out unnecessary things and rule by the naturally exceptional. One of intense isolationism on a personal level, and pure self-reliance and independence - And no care for others. And one of personal sacrifice and order to be in tune with the world, with the implication that those that don't keep in line should be stamped out.

---

I was unable to get to the Mantra Building. But, I'm very curious about Futomimi, so I returned there. Once I teleported back to Asakusa, Hijiri confirmed this was a good path.

Futomimi prohpesizes a great power that can threaten the Manikins in Yoyogi Park, so we head there through the subway.

We meet Yuko again. She's not overtaken by the god, but gives us guidance... The world Hikawa wants is a restrained world of order, one that would cripple the new world. She says that as the one responsible for the destruction of the old world, it's her duty to shape the new one - She says that the world can't remain in a state of chaos, nor fall prey to Hikawa. She clarifies that, despite speaking to her god, she has no reason.

She tells me of the Yahirono Himorogi, a stone that grants an enormous amount of magatsuhi to it's posessor. Hence the power struggles in Yoyogi Park. Yuko wants it to reveal her reason, from her god. She asks for my help to take it from it's current posessor...

This is interesting... I don't think a reason can come from a god like that. I think a human has to will it. Relying on someone to tell you what you want the world to be? That sounds fishy. I told her I'd think about it.