#he just doesnt have a shirt we dont know about anything else

[starboye]

pairing: chris evans x male reader

request: Short fun size male reader with a bubble butt, who is in a secret relationship with Chris Evans; who is married. Chris met reader at his movie premiere and had to have him as his own. Which leads to Chris meeting up with reader when he has the time to teach male reader, who he belongs to and who his daddy is.

warnings: smut, daddy kink, cheating chris, rough sex, kinda angsty and flufy ending, possessive kink

words: 1.4k

it was pretty nerve racking seeing as this was your first movie premiere but at least you had chris there with you, yes chris was married but what was the harm in being in a secret relationship with him.

you walked off the carpet and into the building and saw chris on the other side of the room, you waved as you noticed him and he gave you a small wave back with drink in hand, as you were about to make your way to chris ryan gosling stepped in you way accidentally bumping into you "oh shit im so sorry y/n" ryan apologizes, chris stands up straight from leaning on the wall to watch you.

"youre good" you chuckle fixing your stance and wiping your shirt of any stains "hey maybe wanna go out to get some food after this" ryan asks with a friendly smile "well i mean maybe" you say with a smile back, chris notices how you smile in your conversation with ryan and makes his way over.

"well you dont have to if you dont want to" ryan stammers obviously embarrassed by his question, as youre about to answer chris steps in between you and ryan "hey y/n can we talk really quick" chris says dragging you out of the building "what the fuck chris i was talking to ryan" you curse lowly not wanting to bring attention to yourself.

"you were doing more than just talking to him" chris says obviously infuriated that his boy was talking to some other man "youre overreacting chris" you says before heading back to the premiere "ah ah where do you think youre going" chris tuts grabbing your wrist "back to the party" you say "no were going home" chris sternly says dragging you too his limo.

he opens the door and puts you in before telling the driver to take you guys to your house and gets in with you, the driver obliges and begins driving, chris pulls you onto his lap "now what did i tell you about talking to other men" chris says pulling off your shirt "to never do it" you mutter "dont get all shy now speak up" chris demands turning your face to look at him.

"too never do it" you speak up "right so what did ryan ask you" chris question now moving to remove your pants while he sucks on your chest, leaving small hickeys across your skin "h-he asked me on a date" you stammer nervously "what" chris says stopping his attack on your chest and looking up at you, "he wanted to go on a date with me" you repeat.

"and what did you say" chris says now taking off your underwear leaving you completely nude while chris was still fully clothed "that i would go out with him" you say trying to hide your face "oh really so you like slutting yourself out to these other men huh"chris says lifting you face up to look him in the eyes, his eyes filled with a mix of lust and fury.

"im sorry chris i dont know what i was thinking" you say wrapping your arms around his neck and hugging him tightly "yknow what happens to sluts like you that like to go around and fuck other men" chris lowly says in your ear as he kneads your ass with his hands "please no chris im sorry i promise" you try to apologize to chris knowing the impending pain thats gonna happen.

chris fucking the life out you till youre filled with his cum and you are dumb on his cock, not thinking of anything else but his dick "sorry doesnt help you right now" chris says unzipping his pants to bring his thick cock out, you feel the immense heat radiating from it and whimper "dont get all shy now baby" chris say unwrapping your arms from his neck and pushing you back to see your face.

"youre so cute right now, i cant wait to ruin that" chris smirks lifting you up and lowering you on his dick, watching your face contort as his dick pushes past your hole and into you warms walls "chris" you moan "its okay you got this... for right now at least" chris says smiling at your facial expressions.

"this is what naughty boys get" chris says lowering you fully onto his dick, you take a sigh of relief thinking chris would give you a minute to adjust to his size but no, chris begin bouncing your ass up and down on his dick with his large hands "fuck so tight" chris grunts to himself.

"how could i ever let any other man have this" chris says leaning his head back on the seat "please chris youre so big i cant take it" you moan trying to stop chris by putting your hands on his thighs "nonsense you got this" chris retorts picking up pace, the whole limo being filled with loud plaps and moans as your bare ass bounced against chris' clothed lap "please..." you whimper.

"you shoulda thought of that before wanting to fuck ryan" chris says focousing on fucking you "now who does this hole belong too"chris asks but youre to far gone, going to dumb on his dick to answer "hey whatd i say, who does this hole belong to" chris repeats with a forceful tone.

"you chris" you say slurring some words "wrong answer" chris says smacking your ass to bring you back to reality "you daddy only you" you reply blinking in and out of being awake from the immense pleasure "yeah now cum for daddy" chris spits out and jist in that second you cum all over chris' suit "aww look you got me all dirty, im gonna have to punish you for that" chris says but you dont hear anything as you almost faint due too the overwhelming feelings.

"hey dont give out on me now baby you still got one more thing coming" chris says slapping your face lightly to bring you back, you wake up and immediately resume your moaning "please... chris cum" you say lowly "do you promise to never talk to those men again" chris says harshly smacking your ass, after what felt like hours of chris abusing your prostate youd say anything to get him to stop.

"please chris i just wanna rest" you weakly say "answer the fucking question y/n" chris roughly says "yes i wont talk to other men anymore, youre the only one who can make me feel good, im your boy and your boy only" you whimper, and with each word that left your mouth chris slammed up into your harder and harder till he spilled his thick load into you, he wraps his hands around your waist and holds you down onto his dick to make sure you get every drop of cum deep in you.

"now that what i call marking my territory" chris chuckles as you finally faint out, falling limp onto chris' chest "well would you look at that" chris chuckles wiping your sweaty hair off your face as his dick slips out of you, still twitchy and messy with cum, the driver knocks on the door to signal youre home, chris puts his dick in his pants and picks you up bridal style to carry you too your house with nothing but a towel over your lower half as your clothes were completely messy.

chris unlocks your door and carries you too your bed and lays you in it, you immediately get comfortable in bed and wraps yourself in your covers, chris hears his phone ding and checks it too see his wife texted asking when he'd be home, chris looks at you and then back to his phone and gets up too leave but you wake up "chris" you ask groggily "yes baby" chris replies "lay with me" you ask opening your arms to signal chris over.

chris fights himself between staying the night with you or going home but your cute sleeping figure drags him in, he takes off his messy shirt and pants and climbs into bed with you, wrapping you tightly in his arms as you nuzzle into his hairy chest, chris feels guilty about fucking you hardly in the back of the limo but he always feels better when he sees you become the cutest human being ever after being plowed.

taglist: @mailmango

[4pfsukuna]

Could u write a sukuna fluff where he helps reader take down her braids and do her wash day 🙈

Debrief: i loved writing these cute little 1k word sfw fluff… in sukunas way

“What is it the braids!”

“Say it again and imma punch you in the throat” you huff stabing your braid with the tip of the tail comb wishing you could stab it into something else. You regret the day you introduced your boyfriend to kendrick lamar and worse explained the kendrick and drake beef. You remember the exact moment he decided to become a fan, it was exactly one month ago.

“So he woke up and chose violence?” He ask with a wicked smirk on his face. “Just started atttacking him through the music leaving psychological scars and making everyone hate him?” He follows up and you nod bopping along to the beat of not like us playing through the speakers of your rose gold macbook. 

“Yeah a real menace but the people love him” you tell him swooping your edges with the mini cheetah print brush careful not to make it to big so you wouldnt become the next meme on social media.

“I approve” his wicked smile grows until he hears a specific part that makes his eyes light up.

But that was a month ago, and even then you were holding on to these braids and knotless werent something to hold on to. Especially with the boho hair pieces getting tangled from you and your boyfriends sex sessions no amount of swooped edges, manipulated styles or headbands could save the style.

Unfortunately he loved you with these braids, loved that you had them a maroon color. The same color of his eyes. He thinks you look like a goddess but he would never tell you that can’t have you to arrogant.

So when a white man at the grocery store tells you he loves the braids, you immediately cancel date night with your boyfriend and head home to take them down. Enough was enough and that was all the sign you needed.

Sukuna isnt happy though and why would you expect him(derogatory) to just be okay with it and leave you alone. 

“Woman, explain” he ask with an annoyed look… well he always looks annoyed, he almost misses the section in your hair, it is very small, of braids thats youve already taken out.

“A white man complimented my hair so i have to take it down” you explain and when you dont offer any further explanation except just a blank stare with a tiny pout he nods. He knew better than to ask anything about your hair.

He barges in, in his true fashion kicking off his shoes at the door before sitting where you were sat.

“Uraume is good at hair stuff… want me to call them?” He offers not sure of how to help when your mood visibly sinks further but you just shake your head. 

“No i just… its so much its going to take days and im sorry for canceling i just—“ your eyes begin to water and Sukuna doesnt know how to handle this. Hes use to his big strong girlfriend who even though shes nearly a foot shorter you werent scared of him, scared to threaten him or scared to put him in his place. You problem yelled at him more than he yelled at people plus he would never forget the day you put him in a headlock. It kinda turned him on.

“Sweetheart let me help you then, put on some of your music that you like and sit between my legs like you make your neice do when you do your hair and ill pay to get your next style, okay” he rushes out pulling you to him in a hug and he hears you sniffle. For a woman that bullied a known menace to society you could be so sensitive sometimes but he loves that. Loves when you run into his big strong arms for protection.

“Can we get food?” You sniffle into his shirt and he chuckles squeezing you tighter.

“As long as you dont get your nasty snot on my shirt” he teases making you laugh.

“What is it the—nggh! Did you just bite me?!” He hisses tugging a little rougher on one of your braids making you whine. It didnt hurt but you were so tired, your arms were in pain from holding them up so long and your neck from leaning it against his muscular and meaty thigh.

“I told you stop saying that” you hiss dropping your arms tired of sitting here your butt was hurting also there was only but so many angles you could sit in. He promised booty rubs an hour ago but you had so many braids you were never going small again.

“Ugh you are the worst client ever, youre actually never allowed back to my malevolent salon of doom” he mimics the way you play pretend with your niece over he sees you getting frustrated again and your immediate cable lets him know that was the right thing to say and he’s proud.

You run your fingers through the back of your head pretending to scratch trying to see how many he has left when you notice he’s actually completely done before a loud smack and your hand is stinging.

“Did you just pop me?!” You're shocked, and with the comb nevertheless?! Oh he was spending too much with you learning too much about you and your mannerisms.

“Yeah and ill do it again, now let me tell you about the drama that happened at the kfc outside the tattoo shop since you didn’t want to answer my calls”  he scoffs before starting on the front section of your hair.

“So i guess this guy and his boyfriend were breaking up… actually the white haired guy I’ve seen before I’m pretty sure he’s the dad of Yujis classmate… or something but the kid looks like the other boyfriend… and i think he wanted to fight?” He rambles but you’re getting lost.

“Wait, who wanted to fight, the kid?” You ask stretching your legs out infront of you with a small yawn.

“What? No, the white haired guy!” He sucks his teeth pulling your head back so your eyes are on him. “I’m not sure what you’re worse at taking out braids or keeping up with drama.”

You don’t mention that you’re going to want his help washing your hair too just let him keep talking about his kfc drama with unnamed characters and half sentences.

[the-moon-files]

Linked Universe / GN!Reader - Random Headcanons abt the Chain! :)

Part 1 / Part 2 (ur here!) / Part 3

Sun: Reader (you/they/them)

Orbit: Headcanons-ish

Stars: Hyrule, Time, Fierce Deity, Twilight, Warriors

Comets & Meteors: Content Warnings: light cussing, & Trigger Warnings: none known.

☆

Hyrule (The Legend of Zelda - OG game, Zelda II: Adventures of Link):

Lost easily, obviously, you know this

What you didnt know was that its very easy to get lost with him

Bc he's so excited/curious for new sights he doesnt give any fucks abt where he is, so it devolves into that "wait, I thought YOU were leading us there?? Then where tf are we??!!" very quickly

Does feel bad he stressed u out smtimes but he somehow manages to get into such wild shit that Hyrule's kinda preoccupied being confused/amazed/finding his way out, or any combo of these situations (once again, usually with you unfortunately)

Is the luckiest when it comes to getting lost or anything to do with "natural" things

Like he heard u rlly like this one fruit? Accidentally gets lost all day and panics all the Links + You until he shows up at midnight with a shirtful of them

("I found a few fruit trees/plants in the woods while wandering! I tried to grab a few for you and before I knew it, it was dark, sorry...")

Likes learning little skills from other people, like learning how to do makeup from Legend, or how to spot collections of rupees the Minish have left somewhere from Four, or how walk on any terrain from Wind (good at walking on a ship, on land, climbing etc)

More of a "sunset" hiker than a "sunrise" one

Likes to do your hair! Whether that be braiding, putting accessories (he handmade shhh) thruout it, or helping with hair maintenance, likes how strangely intimate but domestic it feels together with you (u return the favor ofc)

(All the other heroes are looking at you both like kicked puppies jfcccc🙄)

Time (Ocarina of Time, Majora's Mask):

Gets anxious if he's late to things, likes being fashionably early (or ungodly, when u let him get away with it)

Has absolutely been that meme from Parks and Recreation where he's like "Alright. I'm not mad, I just wanna know. Who broke it?"

(Abt the coffee pot for the camp)

Knowing full and well-

"I broke it. It burnt my coffee for the 3rd morning in a row, so I punched it. I predict 10 minutes from now they'll be at each other's throats with war paint on their faces and a moblin head on a stick. ...good. It was getting a little chummy around here."

MF LOVES GOSSIP (wouldn't admit this even at swordpoint)

Wars has absolutely been the person in the meme of:

Wars: "...why would you tell me this??"

Time: "Bc no one will ever believe you."

Wars: ...😦

Has a resting bitch face and knows it, actively cultivates it, scary dog privileges for you,

Type to take ur side in whatever situation ur in, even when Time has no idea whats going on, always, without question <3

The same height as First, (Twi's a close 2nd), and feels most secure when the 3 of you are at the front of the group, but First/Time are slightly in front of you

Like ur literally the person walking their 2 huge scary doobermans/mastiffs one leash in each hand basically 💀

(Once again, Link is deeply comforted by ur voice just over his shoulder/just hearing u even without seeing you)

Very subtly sarcastic, u dont even know he made a dig at you until 3-5 business days later

Likes ur sarcasm more than anyone else's in the group, or even his own lol

Fierce Deity (Majora's Mask):

Likes music, any music (amused at drunk karaoke)

Casually cradles ur arms or back whenever ur falling asleep/tripping/being clumsy near him

Very warm and smoothed calloused hands

Thinks abt what he's about to say so hard/long, that the conversation's moved on by like, 3 rounds/subject changes by the time he's actually ready to talk

Scolds ppl (in like a sentence) who neglect their needs, like sleeping/eating/hygiene

Finds peace in nature, if hes ever upset, u can bet he's already taking a walk by a stream

Likes teaching u/other Links little skills he has, its nice to feel appreciated/needed for something other than fighting or big moments

He falls in love with small moments, like the first time u made them all a dessert recipe from ur world, or repaired First's scarf (for the millioneth time) and bc everyone had gotten their clothes scratched up, everyone needed repairs so most Links were sewing smth lol

Enjoys watching ppl experience smth for the first time, or even himself exp smth for first time

Fierce smiled fully for the first time when you got into the mountain hot springs in Wild's Hyrule for the first time and were super excited

Also the type to hold ur hand while stepping in to make sure u dont fall, or just subtly boost a Link that was abt to fall from climbing smth

Like for being the tallest, he's surprisingly sneaky, the energy of the biggest cat in the house yet somehow also the quietest

Does that thing where someone takes ur hand and like massages ur fingers, palm, wrist and shakes them out kinda for you <3

Twilight (Twilight Princess):

Trips UP the stairs.

Cold start LMAO

ok ill be nice to him,, sike

Easy to bully?? U mean that kindly, he's just such a golden retriever sometimes u cant help urself (tho u make sure to reign it in and not take advantage of it so as not to genuninely hurt him)

Lol likes to "herd" his favorite people, like those dogs livestock farmers have u kno that they say end up herding their owners/their family lol

Like making subtle circles around the Chain, wrapping an arm around Hyrule and teasing him to quietly bring him back into the group before he gets lost,

Tugs on Time's armor to slow him down, mf may be in armor head to toe but he'll outpace all of u 💀

Likes to put his hand on ur lower back to guide u back into the group from whatever scenic thing u got distracted by

(so sue you, ur literally in The Legend of Zelda's Hyrule, surrounded by pretty blondes, why tf wouldnt you be distracted all the time??)

The only time he doesnt herd actively is in Ordon, just subconciously lol <3

Terrible sleep schedule, but sleeps like the dead when he does, has collapsed with a limb on top of you and u couldnt escape

Hard time waking up in the morning despite being country boy, who usually have to do chores first thing in morning on a farm

hates/envious of Wild (up at 5am even on days off?? Foul.)

Runs warm, but complains abt a slight breeze?

Would sleep with no covers if it werent for morning dew

Wishes cats liked him more (its the wolf smell)

Twi has the constant energy of a tall person carefully maneuvering around cluttered/low doorways while someone a head shorter runs by him and bounces off of him

U get onto/scold the Links and he's immediately the first to just sit on the ground, or put down whatever he's holding no matter what he's doing LMAO 😭😭

Keeps his eyes on u too the whole time lol

Warriors (Hyrule Warriors):

Cries over romance novels/dramas

A virgo in all stereotypes of the word tbh

Invented the red-string conspiracy theory board before the red-string conspiracy board existed in Hyrule

Also likes to take care of your hair! (What?? He and 'Rulie don't fight over ur hair, that'd be childish, he's not a foolish boy- Hyrule, hand over the brush.👹)

Remembers the little things abt u type of person, like ur favorite drink, ur favorite stories like tv shows/books even if theyre from ur world, ur favorite clothing pieces like shorts vs. pants, etc.

The only Link who can single handedly claim he could take your closet and dress you in something you'd actually wear.

Honestly once he got the hang of it, would get better at dressing you, than you

(Another domestic thing he adores, picking outfits for u/finding that perfect piece of clothing you've been needing lately)

Born to night-owl, forced to morning-bird 😔

Wars wakes up stiff sometimes bc soldier training is sleeping on ur back, hands to ur sides, laying straight in ur bed, so as to fit into bunks/bedrolls close together

It got better as he was promoted to Captain, so he could have his own quarters but its still a hard habit to shake

One of the few Links who works up the courage to genuinely pitfully ask if you'd mind massaging his shoulders again? He slept badly last night, please?? 🥺👉👈

(Ur so weak for pathetic hurting pretty blonde twinks lol)

The most lowkey abt taking care of Chain, but u make sure to take care of him as a gift back, and you've definitely caught him tearing up abt it 💖

☆

Debated writing smth else first but figured this was easy and short and i started it first so youll have to wait like one more post before more Masc Reader stuff guys 😔

Dw its coming, i havent abandoned u my homies out there 🫂

Let me know what u think in the comments of my slight characterizations here!

Im struggling to conceptualize their personalities so thats acc part of why i started to write smaller stuff like this first! :)

Peace out,

🌙

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for wearing a flimsy shirt and flashing my husband's friends?

Ok. So the key players here are. Me (25F), my husband (27M) and our friends who are all around our ages.

I run a D&D game on sunday evenings for my husband and 4 of our shared friends. 2 of them are big dudes and 2 are women, but we live in a basement suite and having 6 people in it makes it heat up fast. This is on an average day.

Recently, our landlord got our heating fixed. We didn't realize it was broken and blamed the cold in the suite on it being a basement. When it's just us it got pretty chilly in there pre-fixing. After the furnace was fixed, our landlord (who lives in the upstairs suite) absolutely cranked the heat to compensate for a recent week-long cold snap in our area.

As a result, it's been sweltering hot in our suite (like, i've been wearing a tank top and underwear as my at home loungewear because anything more is torture). I anticipated the high heat being a problem before the gang came over this past Sunday, but I knew I had to wear pants bc obvs. I decided i'd wear a loose flowy tank top though, just so i didnt absolutely die from the heat.

Here comes the problem. We play DND on our admittedly low to the ground coffee table. As i bent over to set up a map, my shirt fell a little too far and revealed too much. I didnt notice when it was happening until my husband pointed it out by making a joke about it. I was like "oops" and took greater care to crouch instead of bend over for the rest of the session, so as not to accidentally flash anybody again. I didnt think anything else of it and nobody said anything.

The next day, my husband was quiet and not really engaging with me, and I thought he was just tired because he gets like that when he's tired. I went to work. About 5 hours into the work day, i get a text from him saying "Just so you know, and I know I have voiced how I feel about this before, but you flashing my friends is a MAJOR turn off for me"

I was confused at first, but then realized he was referring to the accidental flashing on Sunday night. But it wasnt just his friends, it was mine too, and it wasn't on purpose. Like i wasnt doing it for kink or anything. I also am bothered by him implying i've done this before, as I dont remember ever doing something like that. Before anyone asks, I have body dysmorphia and deeply hate my appearance so it doesnt make sense to me that I would have flashed people before and just forgotten.

But im autistic so i sometimes dont know limits for appropriate behaviour. Which is why im asking AITA for wearing a flowy tank top in our very warm house and accidentally flashing people when i bent over?

What are these acronyms?

[sulfies]

How mad do you think the ancestors would get if they started getting frisky with Desmond and he started bleeding one of the others!

Like if Altaïr just got Desmond's shirt off but now Desmond's eyes are gold and he has Ezio's fucking grin

How do you think they would react to this? Would they be jealous or interested? Anyway hope you're having a good day!

Ur mind is so huge🫣 thats such a good idea ughhh

While their main bae is Desmond They also are into eachother so they would fuck but they just like being w Desmond mainly, and getting to be with the others is like a nice bonus. So they do all date eachother but If Desmond wasnt into and ok w it they wouldnt care about becoming more that close friends idk if that makes sense. So non of them would ever get a bad reaction to a bleed of another but they prob would stop the first time just to make sure Desmond's ok with it as well outside of a bleed. (ı need to make a relationship chart lmao)

Altair

Altaïr would be into it 100% prob would have fun with it tricking Ezio!bleed into it being a dream just to get more reactions or teasing him a lot like "what would people say, Mentoré having a wet dream about the brotherhoods greatest"

Connor!bleed would get him going too because seeing Desmond be more shy ,be impressed when Altaïr throws him around bc he isnt actually built like Connor would be fun. Basically he would enjoy Connor!bleed acting less experianced, blushing like crazy, hiding his face since Altaïr gets to pull old tricks he knows Desmond likes and see different reactions as if its the first time

I think with Altaïr!Bleed would be the only one to make him jelous and feel weird just bc he knows how annoying/smug he can be lol and both would fight a bit on who does what or if they even do anything till probobly Bleed!Altaïr would go "try everything once" lol I can see Bleed!Altaïr even maybe not letting Altaïr touch as he talks like "sucks to be you I get to be in Desmonds Skin feel everything he feels"

Ezio

Altaïr!bleed gets him going also and he likes bickering with a more smug Desmond who is meaner to him and ofc roughhousing. He would def talk about it to Altaïr to annoy him "do you also react that way when I do-"

Connor!Bleed again he is very into a silent, more threathening but shy Desmond that he has to put more work into. Probobly the eye contact 👁️👁️ Connor!bleed does gets to him a lot and effects him more than he lets on. He also enjoys imagining how Connor would look if he did the same lol. He would also Enjoy Connor!bleed forgetting Desmonds actual strenght and tryng to pull his hands to hide his face only for them to not move under Ezio

Ezio!Bleed he is 1000% into it and has the most fun lmaoo not even a question. they just both look at eachother in "oh this is going to be fun~" and the whole hideout has to wear earplugs

Connor

Connor probobly would be the most hesitant and vary of em all, the bleeds would have to make the first move or convince.

Altaïr!bleed scares him in a good way lol, kinda takes the pressure away from him and he enjoys how much more outspoken Des is "do that, dont do this" and he also does enjoy the teasing he gets a bit.

Ezio!bleed would make him blush like crazy and prob he would hide his face 90% of the time bc of the dirtytalk if Ezio let him (he doesnt ofc)

Connor!bleed... I think Connor would be weirded out and would take a few times of it happening for him and the bleed to even be like "lets try if we like it" maybe outside the bleed Desmond has to go "go have fun, If you cant trust yourself who else"

Once both got over their shyness Connor would prob learn a lot about himself lmaoo and maybe is like "maybe I should be more vocal during it hmm" or just enjoy a more silent quiet relaxed fun? But tbh probobly most of the time Connor would just turn it into a cuddling and small touches session.

[simplyjake]

Enha hyungs with filo!reader

summary: meeting the fam and visiting the philippines with your lovely boyfriend!

a/n: this is VERY self indulgent yall. im filo-american

i think its fully gn!reader.. let me know of any mistakes!

Heeseung

All da titas LUV hee

Girl atp during your family parties

You enter and ur man isnt with you

“Anako where is your boyfriend”

Like damn my bad tita i thought you wanted to see me more

Yk… your niece/nephew

The younger kids love him

Hes the life of the party

This goes without saying but you teach him a lot of tagalog

Or whatever dialect you speak!

You taught him putangina mo and he hasnt stopped saying it since omg

“Yo jake”

“Hmm?”

“Putang ina mo”

LOLLLLL

You teach him how to make your favorite meals

I think heeseung would really enjoy bibingka 

Though let me just say

Good luck getting your man back during a party fr like

If hes not doing karaoke w the titas, hes playing mahjong with the uncles, if not them your older cousins steal him to game and the young kids love playing house with him

And once you found him with one of your cousins babies in the room as he sings them to sleep 

like which one gave him that baby please..

Jay

Okay so jay

When you brought him to the philippines for the first time

Pookie LIVED at the mall of asia let me tell you

Like honey we still gotta do everything else

Jay would love baguio too

Doesnt even care if they are over paying him for the taho he LOVES IT

“Jay pls stop talking to them in english theyre overcharging u”

“Womp womp i dont care this street food is fire” 

Did he fr just womp womp you…

He said this after getting said taho

You made sure he knew how to bless the elderly before you meet everyone

And he makes sure he does it to all the lolas and lolos in your family!

Hes just in awe with the country and how pretty it is

He asks your parent how to cook some of your fav dishes

Just so he can make it at home whenever you feel homesick

He actually had to buy a THIRD luggage for yall cus he would not stop buying souvenirs and clothes when you went.

I think jays fav filo dish would be balatong idk

I dont make the rules

Tbh i kinda do

Anywho

After the trip jay has a talk with you

He really wants to have a house there for whenever you visit and have it be next to your family home :( so cute

Makes plans to propose at your favorite place in the ph!!

Jake

Ok jake

The titos LOVE jake

Honorary filipino of the family fs

Your younger girl cousins are all over him HELP

“Can i have my man back”

“No.”

“You heard them y/n, i guess i have to stay with her”

Oh hes sick

Constantly offered your lola to help cook 

She said no plenty of times but he wouldnt take no for an answer!

You took him to visit paoay 

LOVED IT THERE

Jollibees number one fan

LIVES for the pineapple quencher got it anytime he ordered

Hesitant on the cheese and ube pie

Ended up buying like two during the visits

Jake love love loves igado

Its now one of his favorite dishes

His fav dish tho was the empanadas by the small shop near your house

After the trip he is now officially in the gc u nd ur cousins have

He was already planning your next trip back

Even though youre halfway through this one

Like babe let's maybe finish this before anything else ok?

Sunghoon

Since hes a bit on the quieter side

Hed be a bit awkward meeting everyone first 

If you're in a filo family yk how they are when you bring a man home oml..

But in the end

He fits in well with your family fr

Also hot take

I think sunghoon loves balut 

I cant remember if any of the enha members have tried it before so forgive me

But i just feel he woul enjoy it the most

Loved the beach trips you and him would take 

He buys the silly “I love the Philippines” shirts

Gets a few little trinkets to display around the house

Became friends with your tourist guide

Now they follow each other on facebook

Based off true events

Talkative s/o and bf who listens

You tell him all about the history of the places you visit

And he looks at you absorbing all the info you tell him

[the-s1lly-corner]

Sending this because I think Tumblr might’ve eaten it, but did you ever receive a request for the TADC crew with a small, but EXTREMELY feisty S/O? Tumblr has a bad habit of eating my asks when I’m on anon I’ve found. 😭

TADC crew w/ a short and feisty reader!

hello hello anon! im so so so sorry for not seeing this sooner :( i truly did not mean to take so long to answer this! rechecking through my inbox, i dont see the original request :( but ill be answering it here so not to worry! getting silly by hopping onto my laptop/computer since its in the dining room rn and this way i can keep an eye on my macarons (literally not baking them, drying them out before i do and i wanna make sure no one touches them)

CAINE:

honestly in the most blunt way possible i think he might actually be into it. he always liked him someone who has a little bite in them (and by always he means like, when he first met you because its highly likely youre his first partner)

if you get all riled up trying to defend him he might comically tug on the collar of his shirt, of which steam will stream out of... doesnt have much of a preference for height, but with you being on the shorter side it makes carrying you around a little less awkward!

POMNI:

absolutely taken aback when you just let it rip one day and you go off on someone (most likely jax lets all be real here for a minute), just stands there appalled before you eventually calm yourself down and turn your attention to her

not to yell at her, she hasnt done anything wrong

honestly... nervous anxious ball x angry defender is probably another trope of mine that i think about every so often, but honestly i love it so so much. thats literally just the embodiment of you and pomni's dynamic

not much to say here unfortunately </3 just that you tend to defend her when things get ugly and you dont tend to stop until the issue is resolved

RAGATHA:

honestly maybe im biased for ragatha because ive grown on her since ive opened requests, but i think that she would be the queen of getting you to chill out when something has you all riled up! is so so kind and doesnt make fun of your height, i mean its not like you or anyone can change it. very good at not making you feel less than for being shorter than nearly everyone else

holds

if you get angry on her behalf and attempt to defend her she would be so so touched, but really most things probably roll right off her back, so she just takes you and walks you away from the scene

JAX:

honestly he thinks its a little funny that you get so worked up over things! probably calls you an ankle biter as a joke, which might make you a little mad. definitely picks you up by the scruff or the back of your shirt or whatever! really any equivalent of that works! jax has an entire arsenal of nicknames for you, all based on your height and energy. he loves seeing the way your face scrunches up a little in disdain when he calls you one of those names. all in good fun, for the most part, but he might let up if its something that makes you genuinely upset...

KINGER:

okokokokok so we dont know anything about queenie (i think, i must admit i dont keep up with gooseworx at all and am only relying off of the pilot) but i hc her to also be more on the feisty side

is this relevant? really it depends, because i think kinger would be comforted by the familiarity of your attitude, but also this could be a gateway for angst because it makes him think and dwell on the loss of queenie.... up to you!

subconsciously kneels down to your height to talk to you; he doesnt mean to be rude! it just sort of happens! thinks your fierceness is endearing in its own silly way!

ZOOBLE:

probably thinks that you can get a little overwhelming sometimes. i mean yeah sure its nice to have someone in your corner whos ready to help you out but zooble seems to be the type to not seek that help out; and in fact i can easily see them getting annoyed by someone constantly speaking for them. so you guys are going to need to communicate and work on this together lest there be a build of resentment

remember guys resentment is a real thing and it can ruin so much !! communicate!!!

that aside, i dont think they would comment much on your height, they really could not give less of a flying fuck

GANGLE:

torn between having her be intimidated by you or having her also find it endearing (and perhaps even attractive? shy person liking the one who always speaks their mind, you know?) while im not writing these to be explicitly romantic, i dont quite totally comfy with the idea of intimidation in a relationship.. though this can be applied to platonic relationships too... hmm... mayhaps a mix of it all? not quite sure! probably goes to you for tips to be more bold, love the idea of someone teaching gangle to grow a backbone

similar to zooble, no comments on your height!

[mtfstuff]

Tinder swindler

"Never thought I'd get married before you.", Chris said taking a picture of me.

"I just didnt have luck finding the right person.", I answered.

He gave me back my phone.

"You look good on the picture. You could use it for a dating account. It doesnt hurt to look somewhere else. I mean, I found my Will through Grindr.", he said.

"Yeah, maybe I should look into it."

"If you want to stay a virgin when you turn 28 in two months, no one will stop you."

"Hey! You know I lost it before you did."

He chuckled.

"I know."

That night I couldnt sleep. I always thought about what Chris told me.

I turned on my lamp and took out my phone. I installed Grindr and made myself a profile. I entered my name, height, weight, what I like and want and at last I added some pictures.

It didnt take long and my inbox was flooded.  Many called me 'daddy' which was quite new for me. Most wanted to have me fuck them, let them worship me and move on but one message caught my eye.

A man called George. According to his profile he is 6,3ft, just like me and well build. He likes to bottom and is searching for a long time relationship.

He wrote 'you seem like a dream but I'm probably out of your league already'.

I answered 'You're definitely not out of my league'.

We started chatting and got to know each other. I felt connected to him immediately and we quickly agreed to go on a date next friday. We wrote each other every day.

It was finally friday afternoon and I got myself ready for my first date in a long time.

First I took a long shower.

I toweled myself dry and put on my boxer briefs. I left the bathroom and went to my wardrobe. I opened it and looked for a suit to wear.

I decided to wear a beige vest and pants with a light blue shirt and red tie. I slipped into my socks and stepped into the pants. I put on the shirt and buttoned it up before I tucked it into the pants. I tied my tie and put on the vest. I put on my watch and rings.

Now I had to choose a jacket and decided to go with a dark olive green one. I put it on and looked at my small collection of shoes.

I decided to go with my favorite pair of brown leather dress shoes.

I slowly slipped into them before lacing them. I loved them because they show little wear on the outside but they already molded themselves around my feet to fit perfectly as if they were custom made for me.

I took an uber and drove to the restaurant George and I agreed to date.

I sat at the table waiting for George to enter the building. I was staring at the front door, waiting to lay my eyes on his muscular frame.

I searched for him so much, that I didnt even looked at the chubby guy who entered and walked towards me.

He sat down and looked sheepishly at me.

"Hey Dean. Its awesome to meet you in person.", the man said.

I looked at him with big eyes. If he was George, I officially got catfished.

"Before you say anything or even stand up and leave, please let me tell you why I catfished you.", he continued. "The pictures on my profile are real only from 4 years ago. Shortly after I took them I had to get a big surgery on both of my legs and my right arm. I lost my muscles in no time as I couldnt go to the gym. You know, I'm sorry I did this to you but I lost so much confidence over the last few years and while I wrote to you, you were the nicest person I've ever met since then and I thought I had to take this chance. This chance to go on a date with one of the hottest men I've seen in my entire life."

He looked at me, probably waiting for my reaction but I couldnt speak it was as if someone was choking me.

"Please give me a chance. Only this date, I beg you. We can go separate ways after that, please.", he begged.

"Well,... I dont know what to say.", I finally got something out. "You lied pretty heavily in our chats now that I see you."

"I know, and I'm really sorry. I wanted to tell you but I thought that if I did you would never agree to meet me. I seem to be way out of your league."

"You dont know that.", I chuckled. "Only this date. And only because I dressed up for this."

"And you look marvelous!", he said.

"Thanks."

We started up a conversation and I was surprised how many things we really had in common. We talked, we laughed, we had dinner together. And maybe one, two drinks too much. We sat there together for more than 5 hours. The clock struck midnight and the restaurant wanted to close.

I wanted to call an uber for me and one for him, because he had paid for our complete dinner.

"I know you said only this date but maybe we could elongate this date by going to my apartment.", George asked.

Maybe I was too drunk to say no or I was somewhat attracted to him, I didnt know.

"Yeah, why not.", I answered. "I'm craving a relief right now."

"I can do that for you, I promise.", he smiled.

We called an uber and drove to his apartment. We entered the elevator and when the door closed, he pulled my face down to his. He began to kiss me passionately and I didnt push him away. The elevator rang and he pushed me out the door. I stumbled into a huge foyer, connecting multiple huge doors.

"You didnt tell me you had the suite of this building.", I said.

"Its not the suite but the penthouse.", he answered.

I turned around trying to soak it all in.

"Impressed?", he asked.

"Yeah, quite a bit."

He chuckled.

I turned around to see that he already had undressed himself quite a bit. He only wore his suit pants.

He pushed me into the bedroom. It felt like it was bigger than my whole apartment and on the far wall stood a huge king-sized bed. He pushed me ontop of it.

"You want some champagne?", he asked.

"Yeah, sure."

He opened the bottle that stood next to the bed and filled to glasses. He gave me one and we toasted. It didnt took long and the complete bottle was empty. I felt dizzy but it felt great.

"May I undress you Dean?", George asked.

"Sure.", I answered.

He slowly unlaced my right shoe and slipped it off my foot. He stuck his nose inside my shoe and took a deep breath.

"It smells so manly. I wish I would smell so good.", he said.

He unlaced my other shoe and sniffed it too. He let out a quiet moan. I wiggled my toes in my socks. To get his attention.

He pulled them off slowly and smelled them too.

"I love your style Dean. I mean I couldnt pull of these striped socks with those hot, hot, brown dress shoes.", he said taking another sniff of my socks.

"Well you can put them on to see if you can.", I said.

I dont know why I said it but I still did it. It felt like a slight layer of fog was clouding my mind.

George seemed happy as he pulled my socks over his own bare feet. He wiggled his toes inside them before he stepped into my dress shoes. He laced them up and looked at himself in the mirror next to the bed.

"Not so bad, isnt it?", I said.

It honestly didnt look too bad at him, but you could immediately see that my socks and shoes were a size too small for his body mass. His ankles swole over the edge of the shoes and you could see where the socks ended beneath his pants.

George continued undressing me. He slipped my watch off my wrist and my rings off my fingers. He took off my green jacket and beige vest before he untied my red tie.

He ran his hands over my light blue shirt feeling my muscles beneath before he unbuttoned it. He went down to my beige dress pants and pulled them off. I was now laying before him only wearing my black boxer briefs.

I thought he would yank them off of me but instead he took my suit and carefully hung it up. He turned around and laid himself next to me. He played with the waist band of my boxer briefs.

"Now you can undress me.", George said.

I opened the laces of my shoes and pulled them off, together with my socks. After that I slowly opened his belt and dress pants. As I pulled them down I was surprised by his hard dick swinging towards me.

"No underpants, what a surprise!", I said.

He chuckled.

"It has always brought me luck not wearing one.", he said.

He threw his pants to the ground and eagerly pulled my boxer briefs away.

"Its even bigger than I've imagined.", he said taking my erect dick into his hands.

He started going down on it and it felt amazing. His warm, soft lips engulfed my dick and his tongue played with the tip. I started twitching as he started sucking.

"That should be enough lube.", George said leaving my dick. "I want you inside of me."

"When you state that so nice, turn around."

He turned around and I slowly inserted my dick into his loose hole.

I started thrusting and it didnt take long until George started moaning.

"This feels so good!", he said.

I thrusted back and forth, my body already covered in sweat , loosening his hole even further.

After some minutes I felt I'm close to cumming.

"I'm close, I'll pull out.", I said.

"No, please, dont.", George said clenching his cheeks. "I want your pretty boy seed inside me."

That brought me over the edge. I shot string, after string of thick, white cum into his hole. We both moaned in sync. I, because I had my orgasm and him because he loved the feeling.

It felt like more than 10 minutes until I stopped shooting my load inside of George. I collapsed ontop of him, feeling my dick slipping out of his hole, covered in my own cum.

George turned me on my back and cleaned my dick by licking it clean. He laid down next to me and started playing with my sensitiv nipples.

"You are so incredibly hot.", George said.

I started moaning because he hit the sweet spot with my nipples. After one of my biggest orgasms this somewhat felt like torture.

"Can I fuck you?", he suddenly asked. "I have condoms if you want."

I started winding around.

"Yes, if you stop playing with my nipples, please.", I moaned.

I didnt fully realise what I agreed to until he stopped playing. He leaned over me to open the drawer next to the bed.

He took out a condom and pulled it over his dick.

He got off the bed and pulled me towards the edge. He took my muscular legs onto his shoulders and pushed his dick inside my ass.

It hurt at first.

"Is this your first time?", he asked.

I groaned in agreement.

He started thrusting slowly but increased the speed fast. My pecs jiggled with every thrust just like his belly. It didnt take long until I heard him squirm.

"I'm close to cumming.", he moaned.

"Then pull out.", I said panting.

"No need, I'm wearing a condom."

He started to twitch until he let out a loud moan.

I suddenly felt a strange warmth filling my ass.

"Dude, I think your condom broke.", I said pulling my ass off of his dick.

"Oh god, sorry. I'm really, really sorry.", he answered.

"Its okay, I'm just so sleepy all of a sudden."

"Well, make yourself comfortable then.", he said gesturing towards the bed.

I crawled under the blanket and curled myself together. I suddenly felt cold and started to shiver.

I felt how George crawled under the blanket too. I felt how his belly touched my back while he put his arm over my side, placing his hand on my abs. Shortly after that I fell asleep.

I woke up the next morning and I felt my stomach grumble. I turned from side to side and felt funny.

"Man I feel bloated after yesterdays dinner...", I whispered to myself.

My crotch started to itch. I moved my right arm to scratch it as I noticed something weird. My belly was in the way of scratching my crotch.

I opened my eyes and was devastated. What I saw wasnt my hard earned body. I didnt see my abs, pecs, muscular arms, tattoos and muscular legs, but a fat body.

It didnt took long for me to realize that this was Georges body. I looked next to me, thinking I would find my body there sleeping but I was sitting on this bed alone.

I looked around the room searching for him but he wasnt there. I stood up looking for some clothes but Georges suit from yesterdad was nowhere to be found as well as my own clothes. I looked inside the wardrobe and only found a bathrobe.

I slipped it on and left the bedroom to search for my body.

It wasnt in the foyer and I made my way out onto the terrace. I found it there sitting on the couch, fully dressed in my clothes from yesterday evening, touching itself.

"How did this happen!", I shouted at it.

"Good morning Dean. How are you?", it asked.

I shivered when I heard my deep, dark voice.

"George?  Is that you?", I asked bewildered.

"Who else should it be."

"How did this happen? We cant stay like this!"

"Why not? I mean, I'm stunning now."

"So you dont want your life back? Even if not, you cant force your life uppon me!"

"In fact, I do not want it back. I mean, I was the one who swapped our bodies."

"What do you mean 'you were the one'?"

"Remember the champagne we had before yesterdays makeout session? Yeah, it was a special one. It took a very long time to get it here from the deep darks of the internet. And then I only needed a hot hunk to drink it with and to have each others cum inside us."

"Wait...you broke the condom on purpose to swap with me? Why even me? Why even swap to begin with. Your muscles still have your workout memory. It wouldnt have been too hard to get your muscles back!"

He stood up and leaned against the wall. I only now noticed how much taller my body is compared to Georges.

"I'll do this in order. Yes, i did it on purpose. Because you are honestly one of the hottest men I've seen. I mean, that trimmed beard, the handsome face, the muscles, the tattoos, the suits. And those pictures werent really me. Those are my cousin, he always had the better genetics while looking similar. I always had a crush on people like him: big, strong, muscular. And with your body I can finally get a boyfriend like that!"

"You've done all of that just to have a chance of getting a hunk as a boyfriend? You know you coild get that in this body too!?"

"Dont try to trick me! No one wanted to date me when I had a profile with real pictures of myself."

"But I gave you a chance. What if I wanted to be your boyfriend George? "

I could see his dick twitch in my pants.

"You want to?", he asked.

"Yesterday was one of the best nights of my life.", I answered.

He walked around me and put his arms around my waist.

"So you'll be my boyfriend?", George asked.

I got goosebumps feeling his breath on my neck. I smelled the perfume and aftershave from my body. And it smelled incredible.

His hands opened my bathrobe and started to massage my fat breasts. He slowly moved down onto my belly and kneaded it before starting to stroke my dick.

It was pure pleasure and my knees went weak. I fell onto my knees and George sat down onto the couch again.

I turned at him and he held his foot in front of me.

"Worship me George!", he said.

And how I wanted to worship him. I felt the need to serve this muscular man before me.

I started licking the brown leather top of my former shoes. I pulled it off of his foot and smelled it. It smelled great, like leather and manly sweat.

I pushed my dick inside the shoe and wanted to shoot a load into it when I came back to my senses.

"No! This isnt right! I wont serve my own body. It is mine and I demand you to give it back!", I shouted.

"Thats sad. I had hoped that the seduction would let you forget who you really are.", he said.

"You are a horrible person George! You steal my body and then try to make me forget myself?! Even when I would still have my body I wouldnt want to be your boyfriend anymore. You are just sick!", I screamed.

"I want to propose a deal to you.", he said calm. "You can have your body back, but only when you get a hunk to date you in my body."

"Deal!"

"Good. I'll give you three weeks to accomplish it. If you dont, I'll make you my slave and you'll worship your own body forever."

He stood up again and left the terrace. I followed him.

"Oh, before I forget. You'll get some of my memories in the next hours. Phone pin, where I hid my clothes, credit card pin, where my car and house keys are et cetera.", he continued.

I looked at him speechless.

"Yes, I also have your memories. And not only a few like you will, I know what you know.", je chuckled. "I'll go home now and test this body to the fullest. So make sure you get a date to get this back!"

He pointed to himself, then entered the elevator.

"See you in three weeks."

He waved at me as the elevator doors closed.

_______

Follow George exploring his new body (coming soon)

Follow Dean trying to find a date (coming soon)

[iwritenarrativesandstuff]

sorry i have to brainfart this somewhere but mersault chuuya wearing almost damn near similar clothing to his youth got me thinking about dazai and chuuya's fashion choices.

dazai, in all the eras where he was in the mafia....never changes his outfit. it fitting, given his character and such.....so his ada outfit makes him look like a rainbow. dark blue vest, blue gem(?) bolo tie, striped shirt and a tan coat similar to oda's. i think it's cool, to show the stark contrast between his pm days and how he's faring now, aswell to show how much effect oda had on him.

chuuya.....is the complete opposite. boy changes his clothes all the time. but it's so interesting.

his fifteen outfit is very "him" in a sense. street kid, street kid style- red shirt, grey hoodie, green leather jacket, bright blue sheep armband. he fits right in with the rest of the sheep, and hes so...colorful here. almost similar to ada dazai's outfit. and then theres the outfit he wears in the mafia- the first one we saw back in the manga where he seems to be wearing like a..."beta" version of his current outift- but the way it was drawn (disregarding the anime for a second) it looks like its almost ill fitting for him. the vest is too big, the coat looks so heavy, the tie isnt properly tucked, and his pants are baggy. like hes struggling to "fit in".

then theres sb outfit- hes wearing the standard mafia outfit like higuchi, but with his own touches- rolled up sleeves, glasses tucked in his breastpocket, choker, gloves. its not much, but even higuchi doesnt do anything to hers. we kinda see him "getting into" the mafia work, and theres no pop of color here. the dragon head conflict outift is different though- hes wearing clothes that are "his style" again. simple shirt, jacket, choker, gloves. he also has his red petticoat (i think thats what it is? whatever that long cloth underneath his jacket) that, once again, gives him some color. i dunno what spured the outfit change, but i honestly think the red color is his own touch- his own "color"

and then current chuuya. no color at all, maybe safe from the ribbon on his hat. he wears his coat on his shoulders, similar to pm dazai. (also, slight off tangent here- he always loses his coat whenever hes dealing with dazai?? i think?? which is. interesting. given with how glued pm dazai's coat is to his own shoulders. like he actively takes it off/gets it taken off and i SWEAR this only even happens when hes with dazai. idk. ever since asagiri said beast dazai wearing his coat fully to signify him accepting his role as the pm boss ive been. thinking about it. a lot.)

where was i going with this?? oh yeah. why is mersault chuuya wearing his old clothes?? specifically fifteen clothes? like was it his off day or something. bc if you look at chuuyas various outfit as his progression towards the mafia then him wearing his old non mafia clothes either means two things : 1. this is to signify chuuya, under vampire influnce, is well. obviously not loyal to the mafia atm. or 2. something might happen in the future that makes him swear allegiance to someone else which i dont find possible but??? who knows. im overthinking this

Oh my god I opened my asks to find this monster in here and scrolled through it like ?????????

Please feel free to do this anytime this was an absolute joy to read hahaha

"dazai, in all the eras where he was in the mafia....never changes his outfit." His outfit stays pretty similar, you're right, though he does actually change it once during his mafia days. The left image is the outfit he wears in Fifteen and Stormbringer, while the right is what he wears in DHC and Dark Era.

The difference is the blazer jacket he adds under his coat. It's a minimal change but I think it's significant. I mentioned in this post how I believe the change might be related to his change in pronoun from boku to watashi, but really it's more the added layer of distance that makes this significant. Dazai just looks a little... odd, in the first outfit. The coat hangs off him loosely, his shirt is a little baggy. He looks very boyish, and that makes his deceptive tendencies and deeply concerning outlook all the more disturbing to others.

The second outfit makes one change but his clothes now look like they fit him (still with the exception of the coat, which never fit and never will... in this universe anyways. You mentioned Beast so... you know already hehe). In the case of the second outfit, he looks more mature and formal, which lends itself to a person who withdrew further and further away from people (with the exception of the other two at Bar Lupin); who became a terrifying executive in other's eyes, moving away from the "creepy intelligent child" image he had earlier - even though he is still very much a kid. No one knows Dazai - I think the added image of formality and authority here is just one of the many barriers he constructed to keep people from getting too close.

"so his ada outfit makes him look like a rainbow. dark blue vest, blue gem(?) bolo tie, striped shirt and a tan coat similar to oda's."

hjdfvbdjf rainbow - entering his no longer closeted gay era (sorry lol i couldn't resist)

No but you're right about the coat looking a bit like Oda's. He cared for and respected that man like no other and I think when Dazai thinks of "a good person" Oda is the first person who comes to mind. His shirt in the manga is also stripy like Oda's, a little detail that got lost in the anime. :')

"his fifteen outfit is very "him" in a sense. street kid, street kid style- red shirt, grey hoodie, green leather jacket, bright blue sheep armband. he fits right in with the rest of the sheep, and hes so...colorful here."

Yeah. He looks every bit the street kid and blends with the Sheep near perfectly - more than fitting in though, I think it's more than implied that he wants to fit in and changes his look to do so. Chuuya goes to great lengths to give the appearance of fitting in - because he never felt like he truly did (and certainly the Sheep did not treat him like an equal or a friend).

"and then theres the outfit he wears in the mafia- the first one we saw back in the manga where he seems to be wearing like a..."beta" version of his current outfit- but the way it was drawn (disregarding the anime for a second) it looks like its almost ill fitting for him. the vest is too big, the coat looks so heavy, the tie isnt properly tucked, and his pants are baggy. like hes struggling to "fit in"."

YES you get it!! And adding onto that, Chuuya doesn't really have a lot of reason to want to fit in yet. He hasn't found his personal groove yet, because he has little personal attachment to the mafia at this point in time.

Yeah in Stormbringer he's got a few personal touches but is still pretty non-descript (though you're right, it's much more than Higuchi... something to think about for her character too, and how it seems the mafia may be more of a job than an investment to her). By Dead Apple though, Chuuya's outfit is... well, back to his punk vibes, just a little more mafia-classy, I guess. (I don't know fashion I'm sorry, please don't kill me)

"but i honestly think the red color is his own touch- his own "color""

Red makes a lot of sense as a colour for Chuuya. It's energetic, emotional, fierce and aggressive. It's also considered protective, so yeah it suits him for sure. Red clothes, red ability... red camellias...

"and then current chuuya. no color at all, maybe safe from the ribbon on his hat." Ooo ok. So in the anime, this is true but in the manga, I believe his vest is actually a pale red.

Well. Brown with red undertones. Your point still stands though because the colour is very muted. It's not like Fifteen or DHC Chuuya for sure.

"(also, slight off tangent here- he always loses his coat whenever hes dealing with dazai?? i think?? which is. interesting. given with how glued pm dazai's coat is to his own shoulders. like he actively takes it off/gets it taken off and i SWEAR this only even happens when hes with dazai. idk. ever since asagiri said beast dazai wearing his coat fully to signify him accepting his role as the pm boss ive been. thinking about it. a lot.)"

Oh. Thinking on this. Um. Embarrassed to say - I don't think I noticed that actually. Like obviously he loses the coat a lot and that was already something to think on but... only around Dazai, is that right? Hold on, I'm gonna check.

Ok so my check wasn't super thorough (read: I am too tired and drained to go through each and every panel he appears in) but...

By god, I think you're right.

That's. Hm. I'm going to join you on thinking about that for awhile.

I see the coat as a representation of his role and responsibility he takes on, really, so it's interesting that the formality and symbolism of his service to the mafia gets quite literally discarded in the scenes with his foil and equal. Fascinating.

He's also not wearing it in any of these now infamous panels from Chapter 101:

Huh. Well. Thank you anon. You've just given me a whole new thing to whir about.

"why is mersault chuuya wearing his old clothes?? specifically fifteen clothes?"

Honestly, I'm still waiting to figure this out too.

Because of the purplish hue over this piece of new art, I find it hard to tell what the actual colours of his outfit are but it does look awfully similar to his Fifteen outfit. It could just be his "day-off" outfit but I think there's got to be more to it than that. It could have to do with allegiance, like you suggested. May I also suggest the return to a sense of inhumanity?

These are also the clothes he wore when his journey to find answers on himself began. Might he be entering a new arc where he has to "find" himself again?

I still feel we don't have enough information to make a solid judgement. As the meursault pov continues, I think we'll have a better reason as to why he's dressed like this.

[hauntedwizardmoment]

Also not to crowd ur inbox but I’ve always found the j2j3 relationship to flirtationship to whatever else to be kinda interesting and underrated bc. j2 loves them both but while his conflict w j4’s is like. Ideological, in my mind his relationship with j3 has always been kinda strained bc j2 wants so badly to do the whole like Im So Happy everyone gets to share in Porter’s light thing but also. J3 is the guy who unabashedly and gleefully fucked J2’s thing with Porter. Like. Jace came back in the picture but he wasn’t BACK back but j3 is the thing that completely broke them down

ohhhh i LOVE this. like j2 and j4 are like, intellectual opponents. they can have an actual debate about why they disagree and what their problems with each other are. it's not so deeply gory and personal like it is with j3. i think j2's resentment of j3 is sooooo fascinating like he's operating on so many layers of self-delusion that he's not even able to admit that he's mad at j3 for fucking up his thing with porter or that he's mad that j3's happy about getting porter's attention.

so he does. the same thing he does with jace. be sooooo perfect and pleasant and palatable that nobody notices him sublimating his rage into petty acts of vengeance that only make sense to him. j3's lipgloss collection is rearranged. j3's favorite cereal gets moved to a different cabinet. little things that build up over time. and j3 can't say anything about it because what's he gonna say that doesnt make him sound just as crazy and petty? j2 didnt put the cereal back correctly? does he want jace to make j2 cry again, and over something so small? because thats what jace does if he catches j2 acting out. this is bluejay's one outlet for whatever he's going through. it's not even worth getting mad about, it's only worth pitying (his internal monologue sounds. hauntingly like j4).

and j3 like. feels bad about being the reason j2 hasnt been able to stop doing his little devoted, ever-abnegating acolyte performance 24/7, except for the 20 minutes it takes him to pluck several individual rhinestones off of one of j3's shirts. so he does what he does best and tries to solve the problem with sex. very "i know i fucked up. let me make it up to you"

and honestly? i think this could be the RARE appearance of sadistic dom top j2. finally an outlet for all his anger that doesnt involve destroying things. instead he can make j3 beg and scream and cry. put him back in his place as the spare. remind him who's at the top of the pecking order. j2 may have internalized some very troubling things from his emotionally draining threesomes with jace and porter but thats fine we dont need to think about that <3

[dykeseesgod]

what well its just that you havent spoken to me in years except to call me a faggot or to dislocate my shoulder and you know what else is missing besides an attentive listener a segue i suppose forgive my bluntness please dont hit me but i could giv two shits about you or your vacant mind or your morbid curiosities or your dead fucking dog so why dont you just leave i never dislocated your shoulder according to my doctor you did in shop class last spring you twisted my arm behind my back and said you wouldnt let go until i said and i quote i like to get it up the ass i was just playing around with you oh that makes me feel so much better you know through my screams and the searing pain i can definely recall hearing laughter any way i can contribute to the fun of the group we were just messing around with you fuck you cb id rather you say we beat the shit out of you because we cant stand you rather than youre just messing with me that implies light teasing or slightly oproprious behavior i havent eaten in the cafeteria in 2 years for fear of going home with some part of it smeared across my shirt i havent been to the bathroom on campus since my head got slammed into a wall i believe you were there i didnt do that well you didnt stop it either and the faculty doesnt care you know what im tired of hearing they only pick on you because of your own insecurities aw jeez mrs blank now that you said that my head doesnt hurt so much and people wonder why kids bring guns to school to shoot you fuckers down maybe youre not the bully but you stand idly by and watch and to me thats even worse so please just go youre being hostile and im just trying to have a conversation with you like a civilized i dont want to talk to you i just want to be left alone i dont need social pointers i just want an apology for the five minutes youve stolen from my day see this is why you dont have friends i think we both know why i dont have any friends oh dont be so melodramatic youre in here crying about a dead dog and im being melodramatic shut the fuck up about my dog ok or what youll hit me go ahead ill show you how people get hurt and dont run away to cry like a big fucking baby whats so funny asshole im sorry nothing i dont see anything to laugh at its nothing its just that i was scared of you for like a second im sorry no its ok i deserved it promise me you wont bring a gun to school i dont even know where id get one you were one of my best friends you all were i just dont get it can i be honest if its any consolation none of us knew what to say to you after your dad got arrested it was pretty awkward it was more awkward for me im sorry we werent there for you that means a lot see now youre being sarcastic again no i wasnt its hard to tell with you truce i wasnt fighting a war but sure truce are you i dont know ive never had sex so kinda hard to tell at this point what about my dad im not sure thats considered sex you remember how my dog used to howl when you played the piano yeah i always found it pretty annoying he was singing along what do you think happens to animals when they die they go to heaven you believe in heaven sure there has to be some reward for living through all this and you think there are animals there in heaven the wolf will live with the lamb the lion will lie down with the goat and the calf the lion and the yearling together and a child will lead them the cow will feed with the bear their young will lie down together and the lion will eat straw like the ox the infant will play near the hole of the cobra and the child will put his hand into the vipers nest but my dog killed a living thing wouldnt god be mad he was sick cb he couldnt help it you know they say a dog sees god in his master and a cat looks in the mirror i hate cats me too

[kaiser1ns]

Selfship questions for kichi incoming!

Who likes feeding the other food? Like full on spoon in their mouth or peeling an orange and feeding them the slices stuff.

Also, what are the sleeping arrangements like? Big spoon/little spoon, who steals the blankets or moves around a lot etc.!

mari, hello there ! thank you for stopping by, hope you are doing well :3 now here are the answers to your questions !

1. who likes feeding the other food? like full on spoon in their mouth or peeling an orange and feeding them the slices stuff.

— this man has been eating junk and fast food probably everyday so i will be the one feeding him, because he needs to taste something else than burgers, fries and bubble tea. and i ask myself how is he so fit just by eating this type of food. but i too can eat junk all day because i have fast metabolism. so when we are on restaurant dates i will order for both of us, he doesn't stand a chance or doesn't have a choice. when i feed him salad and he actually likes it, i promise that if he finishes it all, i'll treat him to a burger. but honestly, he should eat healthier in general. like when we’re at a pastry shop and i feed him cake—he looks like a big baby just living his best life, but he spoils me too. two pieces of my favorite cake with a banana shake, and of course, i feed him a spoonful. he needs to experience sweetness too, not just salty foods. but of course i wont force him to eat or do anything he doesnt want, im just looking after him and yes, yes he will have his fast food, i wouldn't dare take the thing he likes away from him.

im not a big fan of fruits, so i always hear my mom's nagging about eating more of them. then, out of nowhere, while im casually playing valorant, he surprises me with a plate full of apple slices, and i tear up a little because he’s genuinely so thoughtful (my mom probably forced him to do it because she knows he is my weakness)

"thank yo— HOW DID I DIE?" and then he shoved an apple slice in my mouth as i munch and turn my focus on the game again, "feed me more i need power up, i will destroy them." then i make 3 kills and call it a day.

2. also, what are the sleeping arrangements like? big spoon/little spoon, who steals the blankets or moves around a lot etc.!

— he wants to feel me close, so more likely would be the big spoon, wrapping his arms around me to maintain that closeness. while me, who is used to holding a plushie, would be the little spoon, nestled against him. once im fully asleep im not moving at all, just on the other side, and the blanket is still there. i always wake up without my cooky plushie. its chika who is on my arms — so in conclusion he is the big spoon before falling asleep, and in the morning im the big spoon as he tend to cuddle more into me. its so nice though, to see him this calm, to feel his breath on my shoulder...he looks like a small sleeping kitten. just the cutest sleeping kitten. also i always sleep on the inside of the bed if it is against a wall so he can protect me from the monsters at night. if he ever snores guess where he will go? on the couch, where else ! i can't fall asleep if there's even the tiniest noise or light, it has to be dead silence and dark like some black hole.

at the times when we are away or just can't do a sleepover, i just hug my cooky plushie that i sprayed with his perfume because it calms me down so incredibly fast and guess what he does? starts using the oversized shirt i wore as a pajama and it became his pajama ! how cute !! i once caught him while coming over to his place and the way i melted...he then didn't speak or give me any attention for two hours. lesson learned dont tease chika too much ♡

[w0w0zella]

Screams at the top of my lungs I ENCOURAGE THE CAMERON SELF SHIP!!

If you have any fun facts or. headcanons about it I’d be open to hear. maybe. just maybe.

LMFMFAOOO

UM

IDK I DONT REALLY HAVE VERY MANY but umm. imo cameron is pretty much just based off of Me so. cameron is a trans guy instead of nb Becuase he doesnt think nonbinary people are Real..

and he keeps it really realyl fuckign secret. Umm. f fuckin.

we both hads the same haircut in 5th grade... he kept his fnaf phase going when i moved to steven universe tho.

sorry im talking about im liek hes actually an alt universe version of me. dies and shits

we both wear the same shirt every fucking day too except i dont stink c uz i fuckign shower

ok yeah anyways fuckin. i dont rally have anything else other than random things i picked up about him that the ai chat bot told me but. yeah. in this CringerVerse he didnt die and we ended up getting saddled together in a dorm somehow idk.

maybe he grew on me maybe i grew on him Who knows. Who the fuck knows. heres room

this is so cringe sincerest condolences and apologies to cameron and his family 😔😔😔😔

[bridgyrose]

Ruby is told by her doctor she has genetic deppression, and it was inherited from Summer.

(That isnt how depression works, but.... I think this still gets the point across)

“You certainly seem to have depression, Miss Rose,” the therapist said as he looked through his charts. “Do you know if anyone in your family has depression as well?” 

Ruby tapped her foot as she tried to think back, her fingers fumbled with her wristbands that covered cut marks on her wrist. “I… I dont think so. I mean dad had a point when we were younger that he wasnt around much after mom died, but… No.” 

“What about your sister? Or your mother?” 

Ruby shook her head. “Yang doesnt. But mom… I dont know but I dont think so.” 

The therapist nodded and flipped through a few pages on his clipboard. “The type of depression you have is usually hereditary. Not necessarily a surety that you will have it, but makes it more likely. If your father didnt have depression-” 

“I’m not depressed.” Ruby pulled the sleeve of her shirt down to cover her cut marks as she stood up. “I’m here because of my anxiety, nothing else.” 

“Your family is worried about you.” 

“And now you can tell them I’m fine.” 

The therapist sighed and sat his clipboard down. “And your sister made it clear that you havent been yourself lately. You’ve been pulling yourself away from everyone who cares about you, coming back with injuries you cant explain, and I’ve been doing this long enough to know when someone is trying to hide what they’ve been doing to themselves.” 

Ruby looked away and started to make her way to the door, pausing when she took hold of the doorknob. “I want to end our session here.” 

“You still have another forty minutes-” 

“And I want to end our session here.” Ruby opened the door and took a deep breath. “I’ll see you next week, but only if we talk about my anxiety.” 

“Then I’ll see you here next week, same time.” 

Ruby shut the door behind her as she walked out of the therapist’s office, more upset than when she had come in. Every week she looked forward to the appointments she had to help with her anxiety, ready for anything that could help her get over her issues with leading her team. 

“Depression,” Ruby scoffed to herself. “He doesnt know what he’s talking about.” 

She made her way out of the building and walked down the streets of Vale, hands in her pockets as she felt the cool fall breeze across her face. A quiet sigh left her lips as she quietly made her way back to her apartment, her thoughts already starting to spiral again as she started to think about her last mission. She had failed to keep the village she was hired to protect safe, Weiss was missing, she could barely lead her own team… everything had gone so wrong so quick and there wasnt anything she could’ve done.

“You really think you’re still cut out to be a huntress, dont you?” 

Ruby stopped in her tracks as she turned to face Roman. “What do you want? I will arrest you-” 

“No need for the threats, Red,” Roman said as he put his hands in the air, keeping hold of his cane. “I heard about your recent… failure, and wanted to offer my condolences. And maybe something to help take the edge off.” 

“And what makes you think I need anything from you?” 

“Because I’ve been watching you from the shadows, Red. You’re lost, just a shell of yourself, lost a friend that you might never find again. All *I* want to do, is help. After all, you have kept me and Neo around for information.” 

Ruby froze as she watched Roman hand over a small bottle of pills, her hand shaking as she took it from him to look it over. “I dont need pills, I need information. If you cant help me find Weiss-” 

“Red, have I ever let you down?” Roman smirked and leaned against his cane. “I’ll find information on your precious teammate. But until then, use those to dull the pain you feel.” 

Ruby rolled her eyes and pocketed the pills as she walked off, her heart pounding as she thought about Weiss. Breathing started to get harder as she felt her chest tighten, she gripped her right wrist with her left hand, digging her nails into herself as she tried to force her mind away from dwelling on Weiss being tortured by Tyrian. 

Blake put a hand on Ruby’s shoulder and gently squeezed. “Ruby? Everything okay?” 

“I’m fine!” Ruby pulled away from Blake and let go of her own wrist, hiding the blood that dripped down her arm. “I’m… fine. Rough day. What are you doing here? I thought you’d be with Yang.” 

“I was, and then she asked me to come find you.” 

Ruby frowned and rolled her eyes. “I can make it home without her babying me. We’re graduated huntresses and she still treats me like a kid.” 

“You know she cares about you,” Blake said as she moved closer to Ruby, gently taking her hand. “But I’m not here because of her. I was hoping that you would come to dinner with me.” 

“I… I dont know..” 

“You’ve been avoiding us for a week, just one night where we can catch up.” 

“One night.” Ruby sighed and gave a fake smile to Blake. “And then I need to be left alone for a bit.” 

Blake nodded and pulled Ruby close. “One night to relax.”

[richardsphere]

Leverage Log: The Blue Line Job

I read the name of this episode and let me say in advance, the reference to a (thin?) blue line immediately after an episode where the villain referenced 9/11 has me significantly worried about this show's direction. --- Oh its an episode about how one of america's 4 favourite pasttimes (hockey, baseball, Handegg and WWE) is legitimately bad for the participants brains due to the repeated concussions. (note: That description covers 3 of the four. Only baseball is not a contact sport) Im gonna be honest, i don't know how this ties into the Blue Line, but its an important message that US audiences need to be more aware of. --- So we have extreme electromagnets getting seeded, and Parker is starting to get the psychological profiling references (in creepy Cold War ways)

Everyone gets really confused for a sec when Sophie turns out to know a lot about hockey. (turns out she stole the Stanley Cup. Not to be confused with the shitty Stanley Cups that for some reason became FOMO Fashion last year.) --- Ok, if you are ever in the same room as any of these people: Dont eat, Dont drink dont even breathe. --- Cheating the guy with magnets. Anticlimactic use of them tbh. --- Elliot is loving it on the ice. I wonder what its like for an actor being told they have to suddenly learn how to do fightscenes on ice. --- Guys been putting a hit out on his own man to prevent having to pay his bonus. (by which i mean paying people to start fights with him, to avoid paying a bonus which prerequisites him fighting every game of the season. Its a terrible plan for avoiding the payout. Unless he dies but the bribes are not hitmen level of money for murder.) --- Nate is really frustrated that Sophie apparently lost the stanley cup. (not in the "lost the tournament" sense, but in the "lost the trophy".) --- Elliot decides to cut the knot: Just tell the guy his medical paperwork is being rigged and that he's dying of brainbash. Unfortunately it seems he knows and is trying to do it for his kid. --- Ok so it turns out that Sophie's old partner is a Celebrity Cameo. (Im not american and i dont like sports so i dont know shit about this guy) --- Ok so Sophie is pretending to be an eccentric billionaire (with a turtle) --- Oh Clients Dad just attacked Elliot? "you dont know anything about me" *proceeds to diagnose* Elliot keeps trying the "convince him not to kill himself" play (a respectable play) but it just doesnt work. --- OMG he just counterconned them by accident? "I know the industry, you guys are the bigger fish. Im out, feel free to buy my company if you want it" Im fairly certain this might be the one case where the downturn wasnt a part of the con. Honestly, amazing on the writers to have this such a natural way for the con to fall apart. "oops Hardison's too good at his job" --- Ok, so goodbye to Cameoman, it was nice to see him and nate not have a dick-measuring contest over Sophie's affections. (I was worried it was gonna be one of those jealousy episodes) --- Final game just started and Elliot is tackling white-shirts like there's no tomorrow. Cant actually see what he's saying to them but I suspect he's going into step 2 of his plan: If Clients Dad wont get off the ice, warn everyone else he's got a bad case of "the Dyings". Honestly, Elliot is great at just cutting through the complexities. None of this treasurehunt nonsense just tell them. --- Elliot is taken out of the game and put on the bench. --- Dad tries to start a fight but it seems im right, Elliot has just been playing the simple game of: trust humans not to want to murder a guy. Return of the electromagnets. (good, puck-tricking was boring). Remember, checkov's gun can be loaded with more then a single bullet --- Sophie still doesn't know where the cup is. (and I still dont know where the blue line is)

[kin-the-muffin]

GUYS

WHY DO I KEEP NOT SEEING THINGS UNTIL THE DAY AFTER THEY COME

for those who are unaware:

I AM GOING TO HAVE A MENTAL BREAKDOWN

more of my screaming under the cut

ok so we’re starting right where we left off and OMIGOSH THE HUG I CANT HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

gus helping w the dishes is so sweet!! and amity omigosh this girl. not to mention camila is just taking it so coolly?? what am i saying, shes probably freaking out inside

I HAVE NEVER HATED A BAND-AID BOX IN MY ENTIRE LIFE AND I WILL NEVER DO SO MORE THAN I DO NOW IM GONNA CRY

is it just me or does it seem like luz is in shock? shes acting like everything’s fine, and not the way she acted in reaching out either, more like shes numb or something 🥺

hunter, bb, why would they hate you cuz youre a clone of caleb? that doesnt make you him. plus i dont actually think that caleb was ever a witch hunter in the first place. also, youre not helping luz. ily <3

why luz gotta blame herself, she couldn’t have ever known something like this would happen. and im not sure how time travel works in the owl house but id be willing to bet that even if she hadnt helped philip, he would have found someone else willing to be monster bait instead of her and lilith

‘we’ll tell them, when we’re ready’ girl that aint ever gonna happen. the way things go when ppl say stuff like that is that the thing gets pushed off until the characters cant help but slam right into it, no countermeasures to soften the blow. i am very worried about how this is gonna affect willow and amity.

AMITY’S LINGERING GAZE ON LUZ MA HEART AAAAAAA

ik there were some people who were worried that the gang wasnt gonna be ok with vee so im glad that they like her :)

well, glad to know that the philip-goo is, in fact, alive. screw that

gus nerding-out with all of the stuff in the basement XD (also camila why is there so much random stuff in your basement? 👀)

HUNTER NO STOP WHY WOULD YOU- UGH I THOUGHT YOU WERE GETTING OVER THIS

hunters little smile at gus :>

amity and willow protecting vee from the alarm clock, i cant- *wheeze*

ALL THE BABY PICTURES OF LUZ ARE SO CUTE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA I WISH I COULD SEE THEM BETTER HHH I CANT WAIT A WEEK!!!!

willow looks so cute with her hair down i swear

MONTAGE BABYYYYYYYY

OMIGOSH ITS A MONTAGE INSIDE A MONTAGE

I AM SO SO SO SO SO SO GLAD THEY DROPPED THE ‘luzity’ CRAP AND DID LUMITY

THE PICTURES ARE SO CUTE, IM GONNA- *dies*

‘HI IM BI’ IF I COME OUT, THIS IS HOW IM DOING IT

LUZ AND AMITY’S GRINS AT CAMILA THEY ALL LOOK SO HAPPY AND AMITY IS BLUSHING

gus, i love you so much for that, the rainbow and everything

their drawings of their families are so cuuuuuuuute (and amity not drawing karen HA)

WAIT IS WILLOW WEARING A SHIRT WITH A SHOOTING STAR?????? YALL KNOW DANA DID THAT FOR ALEX YALL KNOW IT

CAMILA’S RAINBOW HEART STICKER

VEE’S LITTLE TRANSITION WAS SO CUTE

HUNTER

MY DUDE

WHY DID YOU EVEN LET YOUR HAIR GET THAT LONG

AND WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BOOK

(our first real look at caleb???)

OK BUT SERIOUSLY HE LOOKS SO GOOD WITH THAT NEW HAIRCUT I’LL ADMIT I WAS WORRIED BUT THEY PULLED IT OFF!

idk what they were doing but the portal kinda worked for a second, before it, yknow, combusted

what even is that blob, i dont even wanna try to guess whats in it (THEY ALL LOOK SO PROUD OF THEMSELVES, MY BABIES)

amity’s look of wonder at the rain, my beloved <3<3

im so happy they got to have some fun after all the trauma, they really needed it

do i even need to say anything about luz and amity in the rain

luz’s drawing skills have gotten so much better!!! (dat trauma tho. the depression that she cant have everything she wants in one world. in the human realm, she has her mom and vee but in the demon realm, she can do magic and has her best friends (and gf) and eda and king)

looks like her palisman has yet to arrive :(

darnit shes back at school (i wonder how she figured that all out)

thank you for coming to my ted talk, now back to your regularly-scheduled reblogs