#he looks kinda like an amongus

[hiemalstar]

the guy i like constantly texts me amongus when he doesn’t know what to say. 

[raindrvq]

Ride the Cyclone queer headcanons go

Ocean: she/they

agender and asexual

uhm tbh a fan of both aro and lesbian ocean so no set hc for her romantic orientation

Constance: they/she

polysexual demigirl

idk just feels right

Noel: he/xem/she

gay (ofc) and transmasc bc i relate to wanting to be that fucked up girl sometimes while also being perceived as a man but also he's cool with neos (but probs doesn't use them irl bc like,,,, small town w barely any trans kids moment) but genders just funky for him

i see monique as more of like, a drag persona

Mischa: he/him

bi but also ace bc projection

he has t guy swag

he just like me fr

Savannah Potts: she/they/it but mayb also he sometimes

transfem lesbian (real)

probs uses neos too but likes to get real creative with em

Jane Doe: she/they/it + neos

also tranfem lesbian!!!! (probably uses xenogenders)

asexual and demiromantic

Picrew !!!

[surshica]

PRINCESS TREATMENT

: CL16

genre: stupid fluff, social media (smau)

warnings: translated french

A/N: let’s ignore everything that happened in this gp! this is my first EVER f1 fic so ernmmm bare with me! i’ve had this like whole thing in my head for a while but i was just too lazy LMAO ANYWAYS i’m also deprived of some fics..ENJOY ?!!

synopsis: soft launching a relationship with charles — charles leclerc x streamer fem!reader (fc: tina kitten)

yourusername

liked by lilymhe, alex_albon, georgerussell63, charles_leclerc and 793,610 others

yourusername when he gets the princess treatment instead of me..

user1 my streamer is in a relationship..🫠

user2 this means we can’t be parasocial no more…I HOPE THIS “MAN” CAN FIGHT.

alex_albon okay tell him to stop being clingy so you can play goat simulator with us

yourusername he said, “they suck at the game so they can wait, i like the princess treatment” soo…

user4 as much as i want to theorize and say it’s an F1 driver it’s unlikely…she’s just a twitch streamer.

user8 “just a twitch streamer” my ass..as if she isn’t the biggest streamer and influencer

user4 i mean itd be a downgrade for a professional to date a non professional athlete or like model or idol🤷‍♀️

charles_leclerc okay little buddy it’s past your bedtime

charles_leclerc aww so cute (HOP ONTO GOAT SIMULATOR LANDO IS BEING ANNOYINGGG)

landonorris okay buddy..don’t make me use THE blackmail.

charles_leclerc

liked by yourusername, carlossainz55, tomholland and 2,072,473 others

charles_leclerc my jpg era? nahh

user3 okay so are we going to talk about who took these photos cause i know damn well you didn’t take them..

yourusername whoever styled you should get a raise

charles_leclerc i’ll tell her that, it’ll inflate her ego some more

yourusername she doesn’t deserve you 😐

user5 HOLD ON. HER?? IS HE IN A RELATIONSHIP AS WELL.

user6 this is kinda suspicious..what if.

user2 WHAT IF????

user6 what if yn and charles are 🤞

carlossainz55 charlie finally got a sense of style !!

pierregasly groundbreaking ‼️

user9 okay but why does he actually look good in this outfit..

user10 f1 twt going crazy over this fit

liked by yourusername

yourusername

liked by charles_leclerc, landonorris, georgerussell63 and 628,927 others

yourusername stream today!! we’ll be playing among us vr with *drumroll* landonorris and georgerussell63, be sure to tune into it today

user1 WITH THOSE TWO??? it sounds chaotic..

user10 HMMM….

charles_leclerc where is my invite ☹️

yourusername you said no because chat would laugh at you..

charles_leclerc this makes it seem like those two are your favorites…

yourusername they are.

charles_leclerc hand back the paddock passes<3

yourusername IM JOKING HAHA YOURE MY FAVORITE!!

liked by charles_leclerc

user5 bye they’re literally flirting.

liked by charles_leclerc and yourusername

user6 THE HEART AFTER PADDOCK..am i seeing this correctly

user2 what if you actually predicted it…

alex_albon i can already hear lando screaming..

landonorris slanderous.

charles_leclerc

liked by yourusername, pierregasly, landonorris, lewishamiliton, alex_albon and 1,729,168 others

charles_leclerc désolé mon amour le secret est sorti..😅❤️

user6 YEAH I KNEW IT. everyone who made bets pay up! i do apple pay venmo zelle paypal

user1 bye you’re so unserious 😭

user3 aye they tryna make bank i don’t blame them

user2 it’s like they’re a mastermind..IS CHARLES GOING TO WIN THE NEXT GP?!?

user6 yes. he is going to podium and be at least 2 or 3

yourusername you couldn’t wait just a little longer..not till your next gp? ;;

charles_leclerc my fingers slipped!!

yourusername fat fingers!

charles_leclerc that’s not very nice chéri:(

yourusername yeah no more princess treatment for you.

charles_leclerc HEY NOW…THATS NOT FUNNY.

landonorris are mom and dad fighting..☹️

charles_leclerc i hope you never get imposter when you play amongus again

landonorris HEY MAN TOO FAR.

user11 “mon amour” BYE. I DONT EVEN WANNA KNOW HOW LONG THEYVE BEEN TOGETHER.

user10 the pictures..THE PICTURES. sleeping on a highway tonight 🤞

user4 interesting choice in a s/o…

user7 the floating lantern picture…I JUST WANNA KNOW WHO WAS THE ONE THIRD WHEELING THAT THING.

yourbestie that person would be me 😍

yourbestie took y’all forever, im surpised charlie brown over here didn’t spill the beans earlier

charles_leclerc who are you calling charlie brown? 😒

yourbestie you.

@ surshica | rb & follow.

[livelaughlovesubs]

I need to vent amongus Boothill hngg 😩 I've been down bad since the leaks like seven plus months ago hnggg please plEASe 😩

I'm a slut for cowboy characters hnggg I love his drawl literally told my partner before his voice was released if he didn't have an accent then what was the point

Please he's so pretty and shdbdhdh he makes me giggle and kick my feet I know he'd be the Roger Rabbit to his lover (or like Hosier when he tweeted "my girlfriend is made at me I want to die") he's such a devoted hunk of man 😤 listen he's the lock in kinda hoe ya know when he's in a fully committed relationship he's the biggest sluttiest sub, he doesn't half ass his relationships ok

I know a lot of people debate on if he can feel or not with his body but I raise: we literally have VR sensors to detect touch IRL rn so I'd say with some effort absolutely but typically if he's working it's probably best they're not as active

Country boy, I love youuuuuu 😘😘😘😘

I don't care what biology or society says I'm gonna make him my bride and impregnate him even if I have to get Ruan Mei's help (she'd absolutely do it out of curiosity fr fr).

-🐇

Pls, when I first saw leaks of him I thought he was very ugly 💀 I DONT KNOW WHY, I LOOKED AT THOSE LEASK AND WAS LIKE: WTF IS THIS MAN? And all the comments were simping over him, while I sat there thinking, ‘damn, ya’ll simping over such a random ass cowboy? Why.’

Now I’m such a whore for him on god, I came back to the game just for him and have 200 tickets prepared for him 😭😭 mind you before I came back I had zero (cuz I took a break after losing on balde’s banner again) prefarmed all his shit and got artefacts ready for him too. Also build my other characters, grinded till I got to 300 tickets to get an exclusive bronya for him etc etc. How twisted fate is uff.

Anyway, boothill as a slut/ whore is such a hot thought. Him being a teasing bottom, who almost seems like a power bottom would be so sexy. But after I saw his ‘shy’ expression I must say, an inexperienced, all talk no bite and shy boothill is >>>>

HIS BLUSHING FACE IS SOOO CUTE I ALMOST DIED ON THE SPOT, I ALMOST CRIED.

Just imagine him being cheeky, until you touch him, praise him and stroke his hair. How his eyes widen and his lips tremble due to the embarrassment. His body must be overheating again, otherwise he doesn’t have a plausible explanation as to why he feels so hot. Avoiding your gaze at all cost as he put on big airs again, only to squeak and whine when you kiss him so tenderly <33

[teddy-bear-d]

I had a dream last night that all the hermitcraft members made mini games again to welcome the empires members to the server.

And Ethos was called ‘Survive.’ He didn’t explain it at all and it was just a weird building that looked vaguely like a ufo and the only entrance was one piston door. It was revealed upon the first person entering that the pistons would lock in place so that only one person could enter at a time. It also was revealed that in entering the game the door would activate a ender pearl chamber and teleport Etho inside where he’d hunt the defenceless players for sport in an arena that looked kinda like amongus on the inside.

And of course Jimmy Solidarity was the first person to enter because he is doomed to be harassed by fate.

[dana-chan-the-control-brain]

Hello! I know you're one of the people who ship Moon and Solar (TSAMS) And y'all have gotten me into the ship as well! XD I'm not caught up on the lore of the show(s) So i haven't even seen Solar IN SHOW before (i am very behind to before Lunar was Sun and Moons brother :' D) But I have some ideas I'm debating writing for the ship buttt....I have no clue how Canon Solar acts??? Do you know if theres somewhere I could find a Summary on his personality? (and I suppose...new Moon?) I'll probably unintentionally make them OOC...never written for anything TSAMS related, but i'll try!

And is there a ship names thats...like used for them instead of Solar X Moon or is it just called that?

Anywho, I hope you have a good day/night!!! You make awesome stuff! (And I know theres been some people making drama over the ship, I hope you don't let them get to you too much tho!! <3 /P)

🦈Anon

AWESOME!

Heheheh. Thank you. I've been shipping these two since June 2023 so I'm glad I can share the brainrot and some people are more welcoming and cool then I expect. (mostly the ones who can't think critically are the youtube audience but that's expected. Since a lot of the youtube target audience are... like.. minors or really young adults who can't conceive the concept.)

I rewatch that Episode where Solar changes his name and rebuilds the Daycare in a week just for Moon constantly cause it's just... so much admiration and appreciation Moon has for Solar in that episode. I swear I don't know if it was a flub on the actor's part... but I swear Moon calls him 'sexy' as he's dragging him to charge. the stock sound effect of "OOOOH" doesn't help my APD and I've listened so many times and I have no possible idea what Moon could be saying to Solar other then 'come here you stupid, sexy-...." (trails off) sooo... idk. I might have misheard that severely but that's just what I'm hearing.

Like, in terms of New Lore of the show, it gets pretty complicated.

So complicated in fact, TSAMS themselves released a new video on the subject.... But it's NOT a very good guide, as it misses a lot of things. (and no I don't mean the stupid guest cameo stuff) this is more or less an abridged take on what happens with no emotional impact:

Like, this is a good starting point if you want the barest of bones, but it misses so much stuff. I think they don't even mention how Solar gets introduced into this family. lol. Just like "yeah Im here and I helped kill Eclipse" fheahehf. It's a super well made video though, and I don't mind the editing mistakes (clearly when the actors change the avatar on screen.... whoops. Happens a few times)

There is also the Fan Wiki, but as of now, it is incomplete, (@twinanimatronics is working tirelessly on updating the wiki and I wish they got more reconignition from the tsams community as a whole ) but it does give a decent look into Solar

There is also the huge TSAMS Lore Document, which Ceph(twinanimatronics) also worked on which contains a further detailed explanation of the story so far, for those who don't have time to watch 2 years worth of youtube content that aren't in a concrete playlist. (TSAMS. PLAYLIST YOUR STUFF PROPERLY. YOU HAVE TWO YEARS OF LORE HERE)

Liike.... yeah... this is okay but like..

This is VRchat. Aka the lore. Which also includes when they play videogames in VRchat, which don't impact the story... Like Uno, Amongus and SCP stuff.....

And it doesn't divide the arcs. Something that TSAMS severely needs more then any other SB Show channel.

Also, in the early days, the gameplay videos USED to be part of the lore. As the concept of Eclipse itself, being a rouge evil ai that lived in Sun's head (as it was presented initially but we know the truth it was the killcode moon planted in Sun when they separated.)

These days, they kinda dropped the gameplay videos being directly connected to the over arching plot. Other then just saying that their vids are pre-recorded or "we're back" after an annual halloween takeover.

Not to mention... When Earth and Lunar got a show, they became intertwined with the Sun and Moon show. LAES is very much it's own thing, but it's the ONLY Security Breach Show that consists of two Original Characters spawned from the Sun and Moon show. A rarity. So their lore continues off from the Sun and moon show, giving more info on Lunar these days and Earth (their sister)

Then you have the Monty and Foxy show (which is my least favorite of the shows... Personal Preference. I try not to complain cus I know some people like it. But I do not like the plot points in that show, or the character writing and weird directions they take while being connected to the same universe.)

And Monty is a character voiced by Davis, who also voices Sun. So Monty started out as a prominent character on the Sun and Moon Show, and then got his OWN show... at a point in TSAMS history after Eclipse got the star and killed Lunar.

So yeah. I wish the playlists were better organized here. So we knew when each era starts.

(people say Matpat should get on this show lore... And noooooooo no thanks. Keep him away. We got you covered. Ceph honestly has enough info to make a video guide at this point.)

But long story short, Solar is a "Good Eclipse" from another dimension that the Old Moon introduced to Lunar, when Lunar was struggling with his trauma of leaving Eclipse. Good Eclipse and Lunar become friends.

Anyway, here are some key episodes that outline NewMoon and Solar's relationship, as Solar had never met the Old Moon.

Old Moon had never met Solar. It was New Moon who introduced himself to Solar to help defeating Eclipse once and for all. (and by this point lunar had died)

He was actually surprised that this Moon was a chill Moon and could be reasoned with and talked to, considering he was living a rather oppressive life from his own Moon.

There's also a whole episode saga of just these two bantering and talking while they work on the satellite together. I can't remember which specific episodes those are.

You can also see the difference between the Evil Eclipse and Good Eclipse here in one of my all time favorite episodes:

Moon saving Solar's life: (also the death of the bad Eclipse)

Everything is good and happy after Eclipse dies for awhile. (aside of Ruin and Bloodmoon wrecking shit) He goes back to his own dimension... and you get to see what his sad life is like:

From his Moon calling him "byproduct" and failure very often.

But... Something happens and Solar is forced to come to Moon's dimension

here's Solar at his poor little meow meow "I have nowhere to go" stage and just... thought to go to Moon immediately due to their history.

Moon's only question about Solar moving in, is that if he wanted him to blacklist his dimension once he heard what was going on with his Moon.

And immediately, Solar jumps in to help Moon with his problems.

Also during the halloween takeover part 2 electric boogaloo, Solar was the one to help get Sun and Moon back after being teleported to a different dimension with no hopes of returning

Also, after Ruin was cured and Bloodmon ran off, Solar rebuilt the ruined Daycare in a week. And Moon is so grateful for it. (i rewatch this episode a lot. It cemented the ship in my mind and built the commodity that they've been building up for months)

We also get what Solar's daily life is like so far... How out of place he feels, being someone from a different dimension, despite the Brothers (and sister's) insistence, he still doesn't really feel like he's part of the family. He feels like an outsider. (He also has less opportunities to hang out with Lunar. As he expressed interest in playing games with him like the good old days, and as of recently, they have not yet)

also a good example of the Celestial family changing minds on family dynamics because they are robots. Lunar flat out rejected Vegeta-Animatronic is his brother even if he technically is. Like, they're robots. They can change their relationships to each other based on their word. I like to see it more flexible then it is in reality with actual people/humans.

Moon also trying to make Solar feel comfortable and feel like he's adjusting well here. Expressing his concern for him doing so much for him and his family. And hoping to not pressure him into so much work.

As of recently, his Sun died, and he killed his Moon. And in his therapy session (on the Lunar and Earth Show) he expressed regret over "Leaving" them...

But he has not properly told anyone about this.

My reasoning is that he probably thinks that the family will jump on the chance to call him "Evil" .....They don't have good luck with Eclipses.... and every Eclipse they met other than him has been Evil. (that must weigh on you. Every version of yourself is deemed as evil across every dimension. You are the only good one. Maybe there is something wrong with you)

I'm already at the video limit, but on Lunar and Earth show, there is an interesting episode where Lunar goes into Solar's head, and his mindscape looks like the Willy Wonka TV room, because it was a movie he watched with his Sun before they separated and Sun died. Showing that he did care about his Sun a whole lot... Which is probably why he doesn't interact with our Sun that much alone.

He also compartmentalizes everything before he can feel emotions, playing his own memories in third person as if he's not experiencing them.

Not to mention, he organizes and separates his thoughts on NewMoon and HIS Moon, just so he won't associate the two.

I also missed what episode it was, but Solar is always the first to call Moon out when he's being angry, or irrational, and Sun admits in his therapy session, that Solar is the only person who can calm Moon down. (mainly cus he's used to it, but unlike his old moon, this moon listens)

Anyway...

I love Solar a lot, can you tell?

[grigori77]

Critical Role, Campaign 3 Episode 104

Fucking hell ... right away, then ... AmongUs has happened ... I mean I know Ahsley's gonna be one of the vices in the new show, but still ... aha ... so THAT'S what this is about ... yes, that's right ... that's not Travis ... Matt: "What is happening?" Wow ... that's a lot of impostors ... having trouble there, Liam? Oh, it's not Liam ... looks like Tal was the only real one here ... and Marisha was in on this? Hmmmm ... yeah, Matt is not amused ...

Aha, so they're all back now ... that's more like it ... and that's a NICE HAT, Robbie ...

The Healing Party? Cute ... Marisha: "What's Jester doing on there?" Ooooooooh ... do you need some ICE FOR THAT BURN, miss?

Yeah! That's right! Delilah is now OUT OF THE PICTURE!!! Yeah ... sweet! I can't wait to see how VM might react to that news ...

Oh yeah! Grog! And Pike! So cool ...

Yes ... awkward ... yeah ... hmmmm ...

Oh, here we go ... it's the general standard chaotic disorder when you bring these many disparate authorities together to try and make them PARTICIPATE for the common good ...

History check? Already? Hmmm ... Galtheid of the Ember Vigil? Right ... sounds fancy ...

Ah, bureaucracy ... even in the middle of a war is can always be relied upon to gum up the works ...

Wow ... way to drop a bombshell on the gathering there, Ashton ... O.O

Yes! Go off, Keyleth. Get these asshats into some semblance of order ... oh nice ... oooooh, that's so cool ... water magic Return of the Jedi strategy projection ... nice ...

A fortress? Seriously? That's just CHARMING ...

J'Mon Sa'Ord? Sweet!

Hey! Those people are just as cool and normal as the regular folk of Exandria! Cut 'em some slack!

Oh, here we go ... yeah, nice way to big up the Hells ...

Celestials? Really? Interesting ...

Yeah, the Blue Dream. Greenland's kind of another thing ... XD

Ah ... yeah ... here we go ... dropping the BIG bombshell ... the truth about what this is all about ... this won't go down well at all, I'm sure ...

The Holy Curator of the Lawbearer ...

Ashton! Wow ... dial it down a notch, maybe? Sugarcoat the truth a little, at least ...

Braius? Wow ... oh, shit, Persuasion check? Hmmm ... THIRTY?!!! Fuck, man ...

Evoroa! Hey! So nice to see you, little cutie! :3

Fearne's little "WHOOOO!!!" for Evoroa to perk up her spirits is adorable ... XD

Wow ... yeah, she is SOOOOO nervous ... I wanna give her a big hug SO BADLY ...

Laudna sneaks her some water ... Awwwww ... :3 Imogen (in her head): "You did so great, sweetie."

The Cerberus Assembly? BOOOOO!!! Laura: "INSIGHT CHECK!!!" No shit ...

Oh yeah, this guy is a DEUCHE ...

So ... that went well ... kind of ... in a way ... very loosely ...

REUNION!!! Yay!

Awwww ... Kima, we love you! :3

Ah, Vasselheim. So well protected it could almost be called PARANOID ...

Oh yeah ... Vecna ... oh! Hey there, Grog! XD He did that? One on one? Nice ... yeah ... I believe him, totally ...

Wow ... is Fearne actually gonna try and STEAL Grog's Titanstone Gauntlets right now? Oh, I see ... wow ... that's kinda fascinating ...

GROGORY Strongjaw? LOL

PIKE!!! HEY!!! I wanna hug her too ... :3

Vex? Cool ...

Not selling a lot of croissants after the Solstice ... oh yeah ... cute, like Corona tanking during COVID ... Liam: "We don't want your moon bread! Only FREEDOM bread!" XD

Oh wow ... I think Grog and Braius might be friends before too long ... XD

Awwww ... yeah, that's right, Vex doesn't know about FCG's sacrifice ...

That's a good point ... the wind's about to change and they need to get THAT SHIT in order before they start making some moves ... Watch out for the God Squad, definitely ...

And now Chetney's flirting with Vex again ... XD Vex: "Oh darling, even if I WAS single you couldn't afford ,e."

Yeah ... the revelation of Delilah's now permanent imprisonment in Laudna's chest ... this is gonna be SO GOOD ... oh yeah, Vex is LOVING this ... and now she's getting medieval devising PUNISHMENTS for the evil bitch ...

Laudna's looking inwards ... oh boy ... wow, she looks like SHIT ... oh, this is SO GREAT ... empty threats ... Laudna: "Unseasoned beans it is." LOL

Honestly, I think it might have more to do with THE PLACE ITSELF for Keyleth being uncomfortable right now ... given what (or more precisely WHO) she lost here ...

Evoroa's first snow? Awwwwww ... :3

The Birthheart? Wow ... this is beautiful ... and yeah, makes sense Keyleth WOULD like this place ...

Heavy theological talk ... yeah ...

And then how does all this translate to their most pressing needs and the plans they make as a result? Hmmmm ...

Keyleth saying she's been to the Hells ... oh yeah, that DEFINITELY got Braius' attention ... XD

Ashton suggests they go talk to the gods face-to-face ... wow ... THAT'S a ballsy idea ...would that even work?

Yup ... Keyleth and Vax and the Matron of Ravens ... yeah ...

Honestly? Half-cocked is very much how they do things a lot of the time, actually ...

The Vox Machina Big Action Climax! Yeah ...

It does all sound VERY COMPLICATED when Keyleth tries to describe it ... oh wow, this is getting somewhat meta now ...

No. Really, DO NOT mention that name here and now ...

The masive tree ... oh yeah, that's it ... the Birthheart itself ... beautiful ...

The dawn of Exandria ... when the gods were YOUNG ... O.O

Orym! You gonna answer that or what?

Liam: "I will touch the tip." Oh boy ... XD

Careful, gentle ... okay, then ... whoa ... and now he's being ABSORBED BY THE MASSIVE GOD TREE ... O.O

Fuck, he's GONE!!! And THIS is where Mercer decides to take a break! AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!

Wow ... he is IN THE REALM OF THE WILDMOTHER. Like LITERALLY on some weird godly plane ... fuck ...

I'm sorry he is now A TINY MAN OF ROOTS AND LEAVES?!!! Fucking hell that is some trippy shit ...

This is suddenly all very Princess Mononoke ...

Oh hello ... is this her? The goddess herself? Fascinating ...

And here's Asha ... yeah, that makes me smile ... in a dark way ... but I just love my wild predatory lady more, even now ...

He's literally ROOTING HIMSELF intothe ground a little with each step ... it really IS a little like Princess Mononoke ...

So, is Orym, like ... PLEDGING HIMSELF to the Wildmother right now? Is that what this is?

Visions? Oh great ... just what we need ...

And here they ALL ARE now ... okay ... a fallen star? Hmmm ... two gone? What? They're AFRAID ... yeah ...

Wait ... THAT was the imprisonment of Predathos? O.O

A Wisdom save? Shit ... 13? Crap ... and the reroll is WORSE ... OH FUCK!!! Is Orym about to DIE?!!! Nooooooo ...

He's screaming ... of shit ... and the Wildmother's coming to his rescue? Wow ... oh yes, she is SO KIND ...

The Wildmother: "Protect us, for we protect you, and together we protect THIS." Whoa ... O.O

Will? Oh my gods ... oh fuck ... shit, I am not ready for this right now ... damn you both I didn't want to cry right now ...

"Don't live your live in the shadow of mine." FUCK!!!

He's back ... okay ... OF COURSE Fearne is the one to catch him ...

So basically Predathos is like King Ghidorah, then?

Oh yeah ... grab that wood, Chetney! The wee man is SO EXCITED to get his hands on some SERIOUSLY fancy holy wood ... hell yeah ... two pieces, in the Bag ... nice ...

FUCK!!! Seedling has gotten LONGER!!! And it's fancier, too! It's been EXALTED!!! Fuck! It's a VESTIGE!!! A "Relic of the Red Solstice"! SWEET!!! And he gets a card too and everything!

Chetney, you are a massive idiot ... XD

They can stay INSIDE THE TREE?!!! You're clowning me. I sense clowns ...

Oh yeah, Evoroa is just having the most FASCINATING experience here ... I love it ... :3

This place is literally a piece of LIVING ARCHITECTURE ... this place would be like a dream come true ...

Sleep would be VERY SMART ...

Yes. Alcohol. That's the ticket too ...

Chetney's carving MASTERPIECES right now with a 21 Dex check ...

Wait ... attacking from the Ruidian side as opposed to the Exandrian? That's a smart way to go ... take the back door they found in the cave ... hmmmm ...

Good point ... so locking Ruidus in place is slowly BREAKING EXANDRIA ... great ... so whatever they do they HAVE TO destroy the Bridge ...

Ashton: "I've known plenty of artists. They're all fucked up." Braius: "Ahem. I'm pretty normal." Imogen: "Your cup would disagree."

The eternal question, where do you go when you die?

A "double feint"? Orym, I am NOT CONVINCED ...

Bedtime or a quick Scry first?

Braius (to Chetney): "If you would like me to burn you with acid I could." Oh boy ...

Zone of Truth? Really? Hmmmmm ...

Okay, now this is getting saucy ...

Charisma Save or choose to fail ... and half of them CHOOSE to ... okay then ... this'll be interesting ...

Ah ... evasion ... that's one way to go, Braius ...

The bottle lands on IMOGEN ... hmmmmmm ... so she has to kiss Braius? Interesting ... Laura: "You're human faced, right?" Sam: "Yes, but I'm getting a little excited now."

Ashley's spinning ... ooooooh ... it's Chetney? Oh boy. She makes it ALL KINDS of sexy while she does it AND also tries to steal the fancy wood while she's at it ... oh yeah, he is DEFINITELY at a disadvantage ... yeah ... she EASILY beats him ... XD

Dorian's going to ask Laudna a REALLY IMPORTANT question ... hmmmm ... oh shit, that is a SERIOUS question ... I mean Imogen means more to her than ANYTHING ELSE ... and it's a VERY complicated answer ... hmmmm ...

He decides to spin the bottle instead ... and it lands on Chetney? Wow ... this'll be interesting ... that was a UNIQUE moment ...

Dorian: "I thought this was supposed to be fun and games." Laudna: "No-one ever said THIS game was supposed to be fun." Oof ...

IS HE running from his brother's death?

To Cyrus ... YES. Cheers to that indeed ...

Laudna spins the botle ... and it lands on ORYM?!!! Weird ... roll Performance, then ... they both roll REALLY BADLY ... much as I would expect ... it's just AWKWARD ... yeah ...

Ashton empties his botle, follows Fearn and points it at her ... oh, okay ... this is DEFINITELY going to be interesting ...

Oh yeah, he just GOES FOR IT ... they're BOTH going at it ... and he's picking her pockets at the same time ... and he wins ... something random? Okay ... a little spoon? Cute ... Who's "T.J."?

Now they're just MAKING OUT with no repurcussions ... and this is EXACTLY what we've been waiting on for SOOOOO FUCKING LONG ... FINALLY ...

BEDTIME ...

SAMUEL ... how could you? We're so scandalized ...

Fearne gives the wood back to Chetney while he sleeps? Awwwwww ...

Morning comes ... Chetney's still alive ...

Okay ... making their way to the Trialforge, then ...

So they were just getting started, that's good. Not really late then ...

The glass? Oh yeah ... that stuff is COOL ...

The Hallowed Cage ... hmmm ...

The Sunder KIng, Ozo Kruth ... and the Weave Mind ... yeah ...

The Globe! Yeah!

Chetney, you dumbass ... XD

Whoa ... Fearne gets SERIOUS ... you really are FEARLESS, girl ... I swear I love it ...

Yeah, the portal ... or "The Backdoor" as Chet calls it ...

"A few old legends"? Oh boy ... who else is Keyleth gonna call on? How geekgasmic is this gonna get?

Groon is so awesome ... the man is a VIBE ...

Big risk, big reward ... yeah ...

The Luxon, yeah ... of course the Bright Queen doesn't have the slightest clue what (or who) is sat a few feet away from her ... that's kind of fascinating ...

Ashton burns a Rage ... oh my ... oh yeah, that is DEFINITELY the response I expected ...

So they're committed then ... now we just have to see if everybody else goes for it too ...

Making a date to talk to a god ... hmmmm ...

Wait ... what? What the hell is THIS?!!! Imogen's back in the dream? But it's DIFFERENT ... it's her mother! Okay ... is this a good thing or REALLY BAD?!!!

THAT'S where he's gonna end it? Fuck! That's like some cliffhanger shit right there ...

[jerrsterrr]

hey guyssshahgahgahaaaaaaahhaaaa

obligatory silly posting about my ocs/sonas!!!!!!! and. me

and the amongus crewmates because i made a joke on insta that my followers were little guys and it was a silly "where do u wanna be on the drawing" w my mutuals over there :3

those characters are like my sort of sonas in my little oc world, the mind, body and heart!! i have this lil goober with headphones to more accurately represent me ^___^

(LMAO THIS WAS THE ONLY PIC I COULD FIND)

Theres like a big biiiigg storyline as these three being main characters thats going on here with several different characters that i wish to update more accurately on my Toyhouse and i have several posts on my instagram but i decided to use tumblr as to rant and ykno fanboy about my own ocs aswell!!!!!!!!! lol

okay long infodump that probably makes little sense my bad

The way it goes is themed after infinite realities, death,, living and basically heaven? Which i came up with after having like several years of haunting dreams LOL

For the longest time since i was little ive had dreams of being in some sort of messed up apocalypse so thats what the mind is from!! His name is Xiety and he looks like me when i had those dreams, or like some fucked up bird thing heheh

After all that though i started having dreams where i was,, different people sort of?? Dreams with different povs or dreams where i lived entire different lives. Thats Jerri! the body.

The last little guy is called matthew and isnt based off any dreams but more based off the feeling i get when i realize im dreaming. Ive never lucid dreamed but ive always had like a moment to realize "this isnt my life" and im just like viewing whats happeining o_0

All together i made a story for when they get sort of seperated, Xiety, the mind is seperated from the two in a apocalyptic world they have control over and hides the heart (matthew). The body being basically a carbon copy of itself just wanders around this world. Jerri cant remember how they got there or where they are from, but they die, over and over and over. Until eventually, they find the heart, in some rubble, and they sort of gain concious enough to realize "um im stuck in infinite zombie reality hell and this is NOT my reality" they take the plush and try to survive, but xiety kinda catches on and feels betrayed by this. He cant comprehend why on earth the body would want to live knowing what he knows (news flash only the mind knows what he knows of their og reality) HENCE the breaking out and being stuck in a infinite inbetween of constant realities woooo. Jerri and Matthew try to find to find the og reality, going through different bodies, meeting different minds and dying in ALOT of them. It becomes kinda clear that in most realities NONE of them do they live or are happy LMAO

that was like a shitty simplification BUT BESIDES ALLAT they litterally stumble into heaven and meet gods and Reapers and souls BUT they cant stay which SUCKS cuz imagine losing it it and one day people see you for yourself and you cant STAY cuz ur technically not dead just abstracted into peices and yaddah yaddah more ocs hehehe

(ALSO BASED ON A DREAM I HAD)

anyways heres a silly video i made with all of em:

ALSO ALSO OBLIGATORY TAG @moenmomentsthemoe-en

:333333

[jennyandvastraflint]

Xena Reactions S1Ep16!

"Mortal Beloved" well that plus the picture of Gabrielle and Xena looking at each other is just super gay. Lesbianism all round

"help me" Oh. Absolutely not. Byeee

Yup, I too would run off screaming

Xena wanna help a womannn

Awww, Xena keeping Gabrielle safe

Marcus? Should I know who this is...

AWWWW GABRIELLE DOESN'T WANT XENA TO MAYBE DIE

"the man I loved" bullshit.

Yes Gabrielle, look with a bit more sapphic yearning please

SHDHDHDHD CHARON IS A FUNKY GUY

"You're not dead?"

"And now I got tourists" Funky guy love him

Woop, everyone beating up everyone...

What is Xena wearing btw

Ffs, they have no rules? That just sounds like chaosss

"How are you able to travel" OHOHOHHH

He is silly

Who is this ugly dick...

AMONGUS

"smell the living" wdym SMELL you creep

GABRIELLE WAITING FOR HER

Dude is super awkward

A tower... 😂

Looks like Krillitine Doctor Who CGI. Love it

Ew. Put on your shirt.

Candleees

Hades is so... *shrugs*

My guy... You're going in circles

Hades is so... Meh XD

Hades looks like he's having a midlife crisis

OH NO GABRIELLE RUN IT'S THE GUY

NOOOOOO LEAVE HER ALONE

Hah, she's gonna beat his ASS

GET HIS NUTSSSS

"NOOOOO!!!" damn you're SUPER SUPER gay

That's an "avenging my gf" scream

Footprints reminds me of the Mt Doom scene in LOTR ROK

"Gabrielle, are you alright?" SHE SAYS SOFTLY

"The next thing I saw was you. Which is a very pleasant sight." leeeesbian

"You're dead O_o"

"I'm not planning to close my eyes all night" PFFT

No it's okay, let him die again

Gonna ignore that random straightness

"Help us. Please." in a lame voice

Ffs is he gonna try and murder the bride

What's his problem tho

Xena pretending to be a different woman again? 😂

I want Gabrielle to tuck me in lovingly

Oh I hate that...

Xena's in the bed tho isn't she

YESS

Stabby stabby staaab

Marcus, no

Xena has a wife

"You dead this time?" "No."

*shows crown* "All aboarddd"

THE HANGING GARDENS OF DISGUSTING DISEASES SJDDJS

Omg pls the CGI it kinda looks like early Barbie movies. More disturbing. Think that stupid elephant...

Hades is such a SHITTTT XD

EWWWW.

BWAHAHA SHE STABBED HIM

Awww, Xena

And now Marcus can frolic in the Elysian fields

Gabrielle waiting for her gf

HOW SHE'S TOUCHING AND HOLDING HERRR

Yup, your bestie is in the fields now. And you got your wife.

[cloud-based-and-rainpilled]

Staged 2 thoughts!! (this will take a Year because I have a Lot of feelings)

tl; dr at the end

Hmmm I don’t see how it’s a love story yet

Staged 1 works well enough on its own but the second season is really essential as a companion piece upping the emotional ante (which is exactly how I feel about Good Omens 1 & 2 lol)

The opening scene mindfuck; The meta! We have reached levels of irony not previously seen possible

Who do I thank for the tacky Zoom interview show background? It deserves top billing

HE DOESN’T WANT THE GOLDFISH TO BE LONELY (metaphor) and then it FUCKING DIES

Celeb cameos in season 1 being all “hey! I like you!” in season 2 like “you are tearing them apart. I hate you. scum

Also the themeing of Michael Sheen and David Tennant being on their own “side” VS everyone else……….. Simon Mr. Writer Sir i see u and unfortunately i am in your walls

The writing feeling less theater-y works for the meta and I’m wondering whether they always had a second season in mind or if it’s just that well written

Was really hoping for a Colin Firth & Hugh Grant cameo ngl :/

The music didn’t annoy me as much this season since it was more of the horn oomp-pah-pah than the piano. Idk maybe my mind just changed

I didn’t know Whoopie Goldberg could be terrifying but here we are (also I forgot her name isn’t Whoopie)

“I think the wizard fucked your ass” ???

Setting up the awards and the baby was peak *pops P* comedy 🤌 Definitely needed since it gets Sad as it goes on

Welsh kink spotted!!! And so fucking blantant I was scandalized

“I’ll shove it up my ass where the rest of the excrement goes” Michael casually asking David to peg him. Nice

More bad magic. More pls and ty

Also moar Nina pls. T’was but a brief beautiful bluster in the wind

Tbh missed a lot of Michael & David’s back-and-forths VS season 1 but I get that’s… the point

Everyone agreeing David is whiney and annoying lmao get wreck’t

Also I forgot they don’t have air conditioning in Englandland ‘cause my man is sweating in every scene he’s in (unless that was intentional in which case… go on…)

The ladies!! That meta ending with the Bechdel test… I see you…

Still love Georgia and Simon’s sister (who I apparently don’t respect enough to google her name); I like Anna now too! She’s got this kinda quiet sarcastic edge I didn’t notice the first time. They all played off each other well in their 3 some (phrasing) scenes

Big amongus sus react that Anna has better chemistry with the two of them than with Michael of which there is literally zero chemistry. Compared to Georgia and David who are just electric with each other it’s honestly distracting

Actual torture watching them break down as other actors play them and drive their friendship apart, it’s fascinating to watch especially on top of it being themselves but, like, not we swear

“Am I your best friend” “No” Fuckin REJECTED !! looser!!!

Oh huh I can see how this is a love story, interesting

The David Tennant fanboy (he is a Real actor I just can’t think of his name) served juicy vomiting SFX realness

“So you’ve made love with him” BROTHER

It took me 87 years to realize warthog and mongoose were in reference to Timon and Pumbah lol <- I am not looking up how to spell this

The bannister being part of the bookshelf why did this make me laugh this hard

Ken Jeong actually reaching into the heart of everything and casually tearing into it Temple of Doom style and leaving everything to ruin lmao

I miss people getting too close to me (feral noises)

Ewan McGregor is cute and I am shallow 🥰

AU where Simon Pegg and Nick Frost did Staged and honestly it would still work aside from being dangerously heterosexual

Simon & Nick doing the Staged 1 back and forth but literally? mmmm that’s sum gud meta

Oh right I forgot the actual writer Simon’s in it too. He’s still good. I like his Zoom tantrum

Jim Parsons unconvincingly looking for his phone after he casually tells David that he and Michael are obviously in love and everyone sees it lmao

David Tennant has the unique ability to make this absolutely insane face reserved specifically for the emotion “oh shit I’m in love with Michael Sheen” which like

I could kill the Good Omens costume department rn I stg take off those fucking sunglasses I’m so mad

Ohhhhhhhh yeah this is a love story

The Frozen snowman being the big bad final boss of cunt, oof you gotta love a good villain

Michael’s monologue the only one not in the kitchen area just breaking down completely I mean *claps until my hands fall off* he put his whole pussy into it. The frustration? The despair? I mean it felt like an audition monologue (in a good way) he walked through the valley in the shadow and death and came back a broken man with a fuzzier beard

CATE BLANCHETT ZOOM SNIPE

Apparently people didn’t like Phoebe Waller Bridge in the new Indiana Jones movie which I haven’t seen but idk I thought she was pretty funny and hot here. *ding*

MOOMIN MUG SPOTTED

The use of travel as a metaphor for feeling stuck emotionally *clenches fist*

“I like silence” *screaming from the other room*

“It’s like gas filling a room” <- fascinating way to describe their dynamic, it’s specifically referring to aimless conversations that snowball and “fill up a room” but it could also refer to the palpable energy between them— like even through the abstraction of a computer screen there’s this magnetic force that’s just riveting, it’s hard to describe

“We haven’t talked about love” > Seen at 2:17 PM LMAO

Michael alone with the black frame lingering shot. Acting and editing and directing choices so simple and on point. everything hurts

Struggling to say goodbye on Zoom physically reaching out unable to leave the frame that whole scene was just. You can just feel the love through the screen, it’s so layered and intimate despite essentially being “No you hang up first”

Zoom wedding! He stayed!!

I wonder if that’s Michael Sheen’s actual best friend. That would be cute

Anna whispering and telling him “nah I know your bestie is literally an hour away but he can’t come over lol” like??? why? let them love each other I cannot handle this villain arc

“I have to bring that one otherwise my tits will explode” Wait wasn’t she drinking earlier though? #ShivRoyMoment

“I was standing outside your job for four hours because I love you” <- dog from Up moment

Yes he is legally a Hobbit

The car window as an abstraction like the Zoom boxes *continued feral noises*

The direction of David putting his hand on the window and Michael walking away only then revealing Anna and the baby far in the background? We’re in 3 dimensions and they are all painful!!

Okay yeah I get it it’s a love story but I thought this was a comedy haha right guys why does everything hurt

It ends on that meta moment between David and Georgia which I can only assume is to set up for the third season although I dunno if that was planned at the time as well. It’s ambiguous but not distracting if they didn’t make another one

tl; dr: Staged 2 is a unique and excellent addition to Staged 1. The added meta textual layer of the other celebrities breaking down their relationship based on Staged 1 allows for a lot of “hiding behind my hands so embarrassed” moments, but also by pitting them against each other, it reveals their actual love for each other through the bickering. Season 1 on its own is a nice vignette of its time but season 2 with it adds a tension and intimacy that really takes both over the top

Kinda dreading watching Staged 3 since it seems like people overwhelmingly like it less than the other two because of the loss of the Zoom format and constant arguing, but I’m already in this far deep so I’ll stick the landing

To wit— awwwwwww, they love each other!

[gaecactae]

omg I need to. Write you guys about this

So recently my life took couple of mf flips and eventually I ended up back in my home city (which is in fact, awesome)

And I struggled to get a job anywhere until I visited my old elementary school which is the purest place on the whole earth. I love this school. I love how they teach. I love the teachers. They all remember me and love me back.

The principal, who is absolutely my second mother like fr (they even share the same name), asked if I knew that one of my old classmates works there as daycare room attendant. I said that I do know and I actually came to also visit her! The talk went on and she asked if maybe one day I’d work for them as well

And I just stood there like 🧍🏽well actually

And WELL HERE I AM, they made me a whole ass arts and crafts teacher

I got 3 classes to teach so far and they’re pretty sweet kids! Willing to work if the subject interests them enough, very talkative, they’re awesome, honestly.

And just the funniest things keep happening

Y know how kids are very much present in social media these days and as much as we would love parents to control their screen time a bit more, it happens either way

Like on TikTok? You keep seeing literal kids on TikTok, 7-10 year olds n stuff

these guys. Know. Memes.

And they keep referencing to them. They dance. They quote. One of my students dabbed at me today because I praised the flower she drew for a reference for the class.

AND I KEEP FORGETTING THEY ALL PLAY GAMES WHICH IS SUPER OBVIOUS THEY DO BUT THEY TALK ABOUT IT SO OPENLY!!

you guys have no idea how it feels to walk into the classroom and spot those gremlins wearing shirts with Amongus or Fortnite and every second one of them has a Minecraft themed backpack next to their desk

Today one of my students had a pencil case with Minecraft Story Mode characters and I bawled internally

AND ALL THAT??? I mean it in the nicest possible way

Cause just as much as those games are usually kinda cringe or memes to us, to them??? They’re interests! And it’s honestly, genuinely so cool to see they’re not worried to show them off☺️

The funniest thing to me so far is actually talking to them about the games, when you’re a teacher. Cause from what I observed, to them, it feels like something absolutely out of this world. Teacher? Knowing THEIR interests??

I had second graders today and they were making tiny Pokémon figurines with clay (ditching the task I gave them but it was pretty late and tbf we were all tired). I praised the small Pikachu and asked if they could put together a figurine of Bulbasaur, because we were having a spring lesson. THEY WERE OUT OF THEIR MIND, they proceed to ask HOW DO I KNOW THIS?? WHY DO I KNOW THIS?? WHAT IS THE ELEMENT OF A CHARIZARD AND WHAT DOES HE EVOLVE TO???

We continued to have small chats about either Fortnite or Minecraft, still to their surprise that a teacher knows of their interests.

After that long day, I sat down to my mom’s car, fastening my seatbelts and had a single tear running down my cheek

“You said playing games will never be useful in my life,” I started, looking at her.

“You were wrong.”

[mukuharakazui]

Lukas enjoyed eating ice cream yesterday! and it looks like now he made a new friend.. kinda suspicious.

this is awesome i love these amongus chronicles. does lukas' friend have any parents or guardians

[noro-noro-noro]

oh right i had a dream this morning! it was kinda split up bc i had a lot of alarms set but here’s the gist: going hiking in the mountains at a relative’s wedding, but we fall into the fog zone & then go to the scifi subway populated by amongi

- i had a relative, or a friend’s relative, and they were getting married in the mountains. it was a public park. it was a sci-fi metropolis with subways. it was a huge shopping center. it was abandoned ruins sticking out of the fog down in the valley. there was a lot going on. but on the surface it just seemed like a normal national park. 

- i was with 1 or 2 other people my age & then a bunch of kids younger than me, since i’d really rather supervise people’s kids for them then have to make conversation with people, and they wanted to go hiking a bit, so i was like “okay! we can go on a little walk, but we need to come back if it looks like it’ll rain

- the weather was nice! crisp 2pm sunshine in the mountains! i let my dad know in case he was looking for me & we headed out. the path we took was kind of winding along one of the ridges. it got cloudy, and then foggy & damp. i said we should go back, but one of the kids slipped & rolled off the side (they were fine it wasn’t a cliff face it was just a gravelly slope) & we all ended up following. 

- the kid was fine, if a little scraped up. excited about her adventure. it was starting to rain, so we were like ah shit! but fortunately there was this giant concrete or stone or something orb. it was hollow, and we could go in. it was like....10 feet tall or so? there was a very small lower area & then stairs up to a second area, which was comfortably sized & had big windows. it was a nice place to all heap in & stay out of the rain. 

- i looked where we were on my map. my map was some kind of sci-fi thing that had all the locations & paths marked in white on a black bg, with blinking lights at points of interest. since we’d fallen off the side of the hiking path, it was routing us down into the foggy valley of ruins once the rain stopped. i did not want to take all these little kids down there - i don’t think it was safe for them? idk. something lke that 

at this point i woke up & went back to sleep. 

- after that i texted my dad “hey we went off the trail can you meet me at the station” & he was like “ya otw” & we went ??? into the underground area. it was just me & my sister at that point. the area reminded me of an arcade - it had like purple grayish walls, & funky little shapes on the carpet. it was POPPIN it was like a sci fi city down there! AND I’M NOT MAKING THIS UP IT WAS POPULATED BY AMONGI. like legit knee-high amogunus walking around and shopping. 

we were lost so we were just like :O at the surroundings, and the small amongy, and then my dad came off the subway with one of my internet friends who i did not realize was here. i was like oh hi dad! & gave him a hug. my internet friend looked at the amongi & immediately TURNED INTO ONE (lime green) AND RAN INTO THE CROWD AND I WAS LIKE NO GET BACK HERE

so then it became like a video game where i had to select my friend by pressing & holding E on the amongus, but they were now ALL lime green & they kept walking out of range & i was getting stressed out like what would his mom think if i was like “by the way he turned into an amongus & ran away”. 

then i woke up for real

[ferelog]

a dracula book review.

ok team yk what this world really, really, really needs. from me specifically.  

A DRACULA BOOK REVIEW 

dun dun dun. we will be looking into bram stoker’s original 1897 edition which I vaguely pirated online but it is ok!! because copyright is over  (if u wanna read use this link here: https://www.bramstoker.org/pdf/novels/05dracula.pdf) 

so on one hand Dracula is an icon. but on the other hand the novel was written by an Englishman in the 19th century. I went into this thing not knowing what to think and honestly idk what I expected but it was mid. that is my claim and my thesis. the characters are like grain crackers without cheese. the plot is okay and vaguely interesting but not enough to carry the mounds of dialogue and description that you sloooooooooooog through. but if it helps Dracula is kinda hot. (disclaimer: this opinion depends on your taste) 

the beginning has all of the trappings of gothic horror. man goes to creepy abandoned house. man meets creepy suspicious guy. creepy suspicious guy is creepy and suspicious. boohoo yadda yadda. the protagonist figures out that Dracula is very sus within the first few weeks, since man is less subtle than the worst amongus imposter. at this point we’re like fifty pages in and I’m fearing spending the next three hundred pages reading about Dracula and the protag running around in circles. luckily that doesn’t happen and the plot actually moves out of dracula’s castle at a pretty quick pace. this is commendable: the antagonist is quickly introduced in an interesting manner and after this little tutorial we have enough knowledge to confirm that Dracula is the bad guy. this was likely pretty important for first-time Dracula readers back in 1897, when vampires were less mainstream and you couldn’t identify one by his elongated fangs and how he literally goes “When the Count saw my [bleeding] face, his eyes blazed with a sort of demoniac fury, and he suddenly made a grab at my throat.” again, man is unsubtle. 

as a quick aside there are some interpretations of Dracula as embodying “transgressive but compelling sexuality” (from Jeffrey Jerome Cohen’s monster culture (seven theses) if anyone is curious) which I find hilarious and can definitely make a reading more interesting. you’re welcome. 

ok now that the intro is over we get acquainted with the rest of the characters and let me tell you they are dryyyyyyyyy. to make my point I will now rank them from most to least uninteresting. 

Arthur Holmwood: man is literally just there to mourn his fiancée and act as a big strong man to increase the anti-Dracula attack force. only thing he brings to the plot is 1. money 2. he is attached to his fiancée I guess. 3/10. 

Jonathan Harker: our MC who is vaguely an audience insert and as per such reacts averagely to anything. his character does almost nothing surprising. you see a lot of the story (especially the beginning) through his eyes so you do get familiar with him in that way but he is an utter milquetoast. 3.5/10 

Quincey Morris: an unmarried American version of Arthur. he is kinda cooler in that he has a personality. “American” isn’t much of a personality but Arthur doesn’t seem to have one at all so he wins. 3.5/10  

Lucy Westenra: ok she is not boring (if only because of all the stuff that happens to her) but she is so goddamn annoying. she seems like a little doll who doesn’t do anything despite everything occurring and can only wait for people to rescue her which is infuriating at best. does not pass the sexy lamp test. 4/10 

Dracula: weird evil man who has weird evil motives. his lack of nuance is a shame since the novel does mention interesting lore about him like how he lives on “the ground fought over for centuries by the Wallachian, the Saxon, and the Turk” and how “In some faculties of mind he has been, and is, only a child.” but it's not explored and in the end he’s just a villain who kills because he needs to kill to survive. a shame. 5/10 

John Seward: ok he actually has like. unique feelings about what is happening. his romantic interest for Lucy v. not being able to marry her v. his distaste for vampires is kinda entertaining, or at least more entertaining than whatever Arthur has going on. he makes some unique actions (for instance, calling Van Helsing) that make him seem more reliable 6/10 

Mina nee Murray Harker:  

she is cool but severely undermined by how sexist the book is. 6.5/10 

Abraham Van Helsing: ok he is cool if only because he has all the puzzle pieces (apparently) and actually seems to know what’s going on but it has to be acknowledged that his reluctance to explain what he knows screws people over. 1/10 teammate 6.5/10 

Renfield: his personality is nothing to write home about but what happens to him is the most interesting thing by far. 7/10 

u need to spend a lot of time with these characters since the story is told from their perspectives. the storytelling method is also really interesting—it’s told in first-person via the characters’ journals, audio recordings, and diaries, which is admittedly clever. the method that a character uses to record their thoughts is also indicative of their personality and profession. Mina uses a typewriter since she wants to be a secretary. I really like this aspect of Dracula. unfortunately, the plot and characters are still something you have to trudge through. the plot itself is a typical adventure gung-ho “let’s go defeat the villain” type beat, which isn’t particularly inspiring. Dracula’s supernatural abilities also seem utterly random, which makes the mystery of “what does Dracula do??” significantly less interesting since turning into a tornado and sucking blood doesn’t seem to be related at all. why bother predicting this character’s powers if they’re completely absurd? a shounen battle anime could do better (Naruto-excluded).  

TL;DR: Dracula is mid. it is 357 pages of dried bread characters, an average plot, and not even that terrifying gothic horror. read it if you want, it’s a classic, but honestly it’s not really worth it. #sorrydraculafans 

[dizzyonmywizzy]

looking for opinions on my goobies fanfiction idea [NSFW 18+ warning]

for those who don’t know, Goobies is a fine piece of media craft that is currently in a top-down auto-shooter game format. but lately I have been wanting to take it to the next level and explore the world provided to us in a bit more depth.

The main characters in our story are Hoozey Woozey, a big dude with a hot bod (literally has a high temperature according to the extremely brief in-game lore) and incredible fisting abilities (strong arms for punching, which even though it isn’t ‘canon’ is his primary fighting style in the story) and Spinky Winky who runs really fast and is capable of rapidly firing out goopy globs with such force that they may as well be bullets.

Other minor characters include Wiggle Woogle, who is effectively Hoozey’s pet and floats around like a a blob of liquid in zero-g. Basically no offensive capabilities. She’s just there to be cute. This is the only character who can’t speak and Dizzy Wizzy, who kinda lurches around like a drunkard and shoot blobs similar to Spinky, but at a much slower speed. Their chemical composition is such that the blobs he shoots with it combust in an explosive manner (I made that up because the game doesn’t explain why the shit he kills explodes)

I also am trying find a way to work Bingus Bongus into the story, but I don’t really know how to fit what’s basically a single big dump-truck ass that primarily attacks by bouncing dat ass around into the story. It’s just a pretty overpowered fighting style, so I wouldn’t know how to make Bingus die with Dizzy Wizzy (whoops spoilers)

Alright, now we get into the actual story bits. It’s just a framework so you all will have to excuse the messiness of the details.

All of our characters live on the same island, which is about to be swarmed with an invasive species of black blobs. No it is not a racial allegory. Take it up with the Goobies developers if you see it that way, you damn racist. Anyway, these guys range from little blobs, to big blobs, to amongus-shaped blobs, to spidery blobs, blobs that are suicide bombers, and boss blobs that we can get to later… basically it’s a whole lot of blobs.

I’m not particularly attached to the characters’ genders. The choices will make more sense once you read the NSFW ending but these guys are blobs, they really don’t even need to be gendered. They don’t even need to be capable of contorting their bodies to have genitals.

Anyway, here’s how the story starts. Hoozey is out with his pet, Wiggle, and just so happens to encounter Spinky while he’s out. I guess they’re just doing their own things. Details are still a work in progress, like I said. They feel like something is off with the amount of aggressive black blobs that they’ve been seeing around lately, and lo and behold they start bouncing out of the ocean en masse.

It’s mostly the weak bitches, and their numbers are nothing to really write home about until a bunch of blobs walking on four legs show up along with this octopus looking motherfucker shows up. I should mention that none of the normal enemies are really any bigger than the main characters. The spider blobs are about the same size as them, as is the octo-blob. It’s at this point the characters realize a serious issue might be arising, and they agree to have the speedy Spinky take Wiggle to safety and call for help from their other friends.

So Hoozey is left on his own to fight the big fuckers and I’m going to make this a cool fight scene. Lots of gory blob action. In game the octopus blob is a mini-boss, and it has this thing it does where it starts sucking you in towards it. All I know for sure is I want it to do this to Hoozey while he’s struggling to hang on to a tree or some shit and eventually let go, using the socking to give himself tons of momentum and fucking slam the octopus into a big mess.

Now comes a boss, Amam, who’s pissed that so many blobs are dying (and is capable of speaking). Amam is a big fucker with epic hair that ass-crashes into the ground to launch projectiles in all directions, and can focus energy into big explosive projectiles.

Hoozey’s kinda getting butt-fucked, but then Spinky shows up with their friend(s). This is where Dizzy Wizzy comes in, and optionally Bingus if you want.

They do some epic shit, killing tons of little minion blobs, spider blobs, and figuring out Hoozey can throw little blobs at Amam for Dizzy to shoot so they explode like grenades. Hoozey does some epic shit where, to finish Amam off, he climbs up on Amam’s face, increases his body temperature (he can control it when he gets really mad) and singes Amam’s eyes out with his burning hot hands while the other characters shoot the shit out of it. Amam explodes into a huge gory (for blobs) mess and the characters convene to have some-post battle dialogue.

Dizzy reveals he sent Wiggle to hide safely in a mountain cave. It’s important to include that they need to go back and get Wiggle or she’s gonna fucking die in there. I don’t want any loose ends by the end of the story like “WHAT HAPPENED TO WIGGLE IS SHE OKAY.” If they die, Wiggle will die.

But the calm doesn’t last long. The sea is dark and churning, and it’s because there’s a massive fucking swarm of blobs, big and small, with a horde of amoguses running headlong at them. They have no choice but to run away and Dizzy is so dumb and slow that he gets totally consumed. The blobs get killed by absorbing things into their bodies, so he’s like getting absorbed by dozens of blobs and screaming horribly. It’s awful.

And here’s where the endings come in. I’m not sure which I want to use yet.

The “canon” and clean ending is this: They run to a mountain at the center of the island, blob army hot at their heels, and eventually get surrounded and die, crying out to each other as they get consumed. It’s an epic and emotional last stand where they fight even though they’re getting fucking annihilated. It’s the bad ending, and is canon cus you literally cannot win in the game. You play until you get overrun and die.

The good ending is as follows.

To escape the horrifying horde, they climb up a very steep cliff face until they can’t anymore and look out over the seemingly endless horde of blobs, still coming out of the ocean yet covering every inch of land on the island. Hoozey and Spinky are scared and know that they have no way out and perhaps an hour at most, as the blobs are climbing on each other World War Z style to try and get up to them. They could fight back, but defeat is inevitable. They confess their love for each other and fornicate. I envision Hoozey using his big strong arms to hold Spinky while he… does the thing, but as an amogus it’s not like Spinky has love handles or anything. Idk.

Now I will tell you that this is an impreg scene. Spinky needs to bear Hoozey’s child. As blobs, they have a very rapid gestation period and Spinky will spawn the child in like 5 minutes mitosis style. All of Hoozey’s - gum? Congeals into a blob inside of Spinky that grows very rapidly, splits off, and continues growing into a blobg that is built like Hoozey, but huge and with super long limbs.

They’re very surprised by the fact that this happened. I guess Spinky didn’t know she was ovulat—globulating? I dunno. They were just banging to enjoy their last minutes but it’s actually gonna save them.

Also the child retains both of their memories and is fully matured in like 5 minutes, ready for battle. Blob biology.

The child does some epic shit where it grabs blobs, now coming over the cliff face and pops them like grapes. Then starts throwing them in bunches into the crowd where they explode epicly, killing thousands. He’s like the beast titan if the beast titan could make everything he threw explode.

Together they dive into the crowd, believing that victory is possible and that they can save their island.

Cliffhanger ending. Do they win? I don’t know, reader, that’s for you to decide.

I am the greatest author of all time. Everyone else can eat shit. I literally made blobs fucking an essential plot point.

Anyway, thoughts ?

[minusgangtime]

*snrk* check this out~ *he shows blue a very specific chicken nuggie, but the thing about this nuggie was that it was PERFECTLY SHAPED like an amongus character~* ta daaa~

"Hmm... I have a feeling this nuggie looks kinda... sus..."

And then out in the back-

"F**k you!!"

"PFFFHAHAHAHA!!"