#he works too hard! someone tell him to prioritize himself for once!

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

rough day...

[fallingdownhell]

haii may i request the sumeru men with a people pleaser so?

Love this! As a people pleaser myself, I know how hard this can be. Still, hope I did a decent job with this.

Characters Included: Tighnari; Cyno; Kaveh; Alhaitham; Wanderer

Content: gender neutral reader; established relationship; some comfort and fluff

Word count: 2k words

Have fun with this<3

Tighnari

he understands you want to help people

he really does... but when it comes at the cost of your own health and well being, that's where he draws a line

Tighnari watches you as you go around doing anything people ask of you, always a smile on your lips

but he sees behind that smile, sees the tired expression you so desperately try to hide

He knows you want to make people happy.. but there's got to be a line. Sometimes, one has to prioritize themselves

But when you remain unwilling to stand up for yourself, he steps in to take over for you. Enough is enough!

When he sees you taking on the work of someone else yet again, he decides to step in

He takes you away from the situation, making up some excuse about needing your help with something before he drags you to his hut by your hand

You protest against him at first, but when he didn't budge at all, you knew to just accept your fate. After all, Tighnari can be quite stubborn if he wants to be..

As you arrive, he instructs you to sit down on the bed, which you oblige to while he goes and makes you a quick snack, since he noticed you haven't really eaten anything all day. You had even skipped his top tier breakfast..

He literally watches you like a hawk, making sure that you eat at least half of the food he made before he tells you to lie down and relax

You try and protest again, but he's firm in his resolve

With a sigh, you comply. And as soon as your head hits the pillow, you notice just how exhausted and drained you truly feel..

Tighnari looks at you with an expression akin to "I knew it". He lied down next to you, wrapping his arms around your waist as he just held you like this..

"You don't always have to make everyone around you happy. You need to think about yourself and your own well being from time to time as well. You need breaks, just like everyone else needs them. Rest for now, my flower. I'll watch over you.."

Cyno

Cyno's an interesting case...

He wouldn't notice that behaviour in you at all at first. And once he does, he admires it first and foremost..

People were always afraid of him... they were when he was younger still.. and they are now, thanks to his status as General Mahamatra..

He finds it fascinating that people come to you to ask for your help constantly.. he can't even imagine what that would be like for him.. there would definitely be some underlying jealousy from him at the start

But.. overtime.. as the people ask more and more of you and you growing more and more stressed and tired trying to do all of them justice, did he finally see the downside to that kind of life..

Especially when it's affecting such a kindhearted soul like you, who can never turn anyone down for anything

after reaching that point, he starts to keep an eye out for you, making sure that you're not overworking yourself too much. But he wouldn't step in just yet, believing that you'd know your limits yourself

So, he just watches, as people come running to you again and again, asking you to fulfill simple tasks for them that they could have easily done themselves

it's not until much later does he realize that these people are only exploiting you and your kindness. To be fair, he only knows the extreme examples of such behaviour, so he didn't immediately recognise it with such "small" acts

but as time goes on, as he sees just how tired and exhausted you get, he starts to get worried himself

he's constantly asking himself why you wouldn't just turn those people down. He really doesn't understand it

But what he does understand is that you need a break. Urgently.

so without waiting any further, he goes into action. Cyno knows your usual schedule like the back of his hand so he knows that he has some time on hand

he goes to the market and buys all the ingredients for your favourite meal, which he promptly cooks you for dinner. After you've come home and eaten the food, he insists you take a nice, relaxing bath

after that, he gives you a nice and long massage, relaxing all your muscles perfectly. And once that is over, he cuddles you for the rest of the night until you both fall asleep

He's seen how hard you were working these last few days, so he wants you to know that he appreciates you and that he wants to help you unwind from time to time

"I've seen how these people treat you... you and the kindness you show them. Remember that it's okay to say No to them every now and then. You don't and can't always be responsible for everyone. You need to look out for yourself more. But for now, relax, my Lotus. Relax and let me take care of you for tonight."

Alhaitham

At some point, you became the unofficial librarian of the house of Daena

Not because you wanted to or applied for the job.. you just spent a lot of time in the library so you know where most of the books are. And people come to you when they need help with literally anything, because you never refuse to help anyone

At first you were happy to be able to help out a few struggling students, glad you were able to guide them in the right direction

But soon, word spread around and people came flooding you every tile they spotted you within the house of Daena

What was once a nice interaction and an exchange of information soon became an overwhelming amount of people bombarding you with questions

And even though it became too much for you very quickly, you didn't have the heart, not the opportunity, to turn them down

Much to the displeasure of someone else, as well

Though your boyfriend loved the House of Daena and to spend time with you here, he didn't appreciate people flooding you like that, taking time away he would usually spend with you and just being generally very loud

And since he knew you would never turn anyone down, he had to do it for you. He did not care what people thought or said about him, his reputation already being not the best. But what's it to him?

And today especially.. people were just so damn pushy and demanding towards you. It didn't sit right with him..

He watched you for a bit as two students were heavily debating something with you, raising their voices slightly. He noticed you growing uncomfortable in the situation yet still not saying anything

Deciding that he had to step in at this point, he walked over to you and simply took your hand, pulling you along with him without uttering a word

The two students were yelling after you, but he didn't pay them any mind. You weren't protesting at all, simply following him along, because you already knew why he did that

After he turned a quiet corner within the Academiya, he turned around and pulled you into his arms, engulfing you in a comforting hug

"I told you so many times.. you need to learn how to turn people down. They'll walk all over you otherwise. Please don't take this the wrong way, I'm just concerned about you. ...How are you? Feeling better?"

Kaveh

Oh boy...

this is quite the difficult situation, because Kaveh is such a big people pleaser himself

You two are constantly looking out for the other, reminding them to take breaks and to take things easy

you are both great at giving actual good, helpful advise. But when it comes to following them yourselves.. both you and Kaveh need to hone that skill much more

you constantly keep an eye out for him, as he does for you. Kaveh knows the telltale signs when you get exhausted and he always tries to gently remove you from the situation to get you to lie down when he sees them... which works for the most part

but he's often away on trips for his work, so he's not constantly around you to keep you safe from your own self destructive behaviour

when that happens and he returns from a trip a few days later, he finds you utterly exhausted and tired, about to collapse while standing up

he quite literally forces you to sit down or lie down while he makes you some simple food, mostly soups and such

and every time, you promise each other to look out better and to take better care of yourselves... only for that promise to be broken a few days later, letting the cycle begin anew.

Kaveh knows that things can't keep on going like this, something has to change. Something has to change, right now!

So he sits you down for an honest talk where he plays with open cards, sharing all his doubts and worries with you

It's an emotional talk, many tears from both you and him flow, but in the end, you both agree that you can't keep going like this, unless you want to destroy yourself completely

it will take a lot of time and effort, but you're sure that you can do this. You can do anything with Kaveh and his support by your side to help you back on your feet when the world tries to push you down again

"I know how hard it is.. you want to he helpful, you feel like that's the only way you can accomplish something in this world. But overworking yourself is not the right way to do this. Listen to me and listen to yourself. You are also important. So please, start treating yourself that way."

Wanderer

Hates it. Absolutely hates it

But not for the reason you might think

well... At first, at least

you see.... his issue in the beginning is how much time it takes away from your shared time together

every time you're out with him, even just for a walk, people come up to you, either engaging in conversation or asking favours of you

at the start, he only scoffs and shoots nasty looks at those people, but he does not interrupt, since he doesn't want to come of as rude to possible friends of yours

but he's still annoyed beyond anything that your attention is taken away from him

after he gets over the inital feelings of annoyance and anger, he begins to notice a pattern every time people approach you with a request in mind

he begins to notice your little hesitance before accepting the request, notices how your shoulders slump just slightly after they walk away without even giving you proper thanks

so, he decides to observe further... and boy, does he not like what he sees

because the longer he watches this unfold, the more rage he feels building up inside him

why were those pesky humans always coming to you for such trivial things? And why aren't you turning them down? In fact, he hasn't seen you turn down a single person so far..

of course, as he keeps on observing you, he notices you growing more and more tired the longer this keeps going

until one day, he just has enough

it happened when you two were out for a nice stroll in the evening and someone was approaching you yet again

something in him just snapped when he saw that familiar expression in their face

he quite rudely and loudly just stated a firm "NO!", taking your hand in his and just pulling you along with him

you did not protest against this, partly because you were surprised and a bit shocked by his strong reaction

he took you out of the city, to an open field where he sat down with you, watching the stars up in the sky

he kept quiet for a long while, and you also kept quiet, not knowing how to best tackle this situation

but as it turns out, you didn't have to do that at all

"Idiot... going around and letting yourself get expoited like that. What would you do if I weren't here to look out for you, huh? Just... be more careful. You don't always have to agree to anything, you can just say No to them. It's not that hard... But if you can't do that.. let me know. I'll do it for you."

[ahyesmygoodomenssideblog]

Why Crowley leaves.

Crowley walks out of multiple fights and the reason why matters.

In the bandstand scene, Crowley and Aziraphale are unable to reach agreement about what they're going to do once they find the Antichrist. Aziraphale by that point knows exactly where the Antichrist is, but he chooses to hide it from Crowley. The crux of their disagreement is not about whether to kill the Antichrist - Azriaphale is on board with that much - but he thinks he's too good to be the one getting his hands dirty:

A: And then what? We eliminate him? C: Someone does. I'm not personally up for killing kids. A: You're the demon. I'm the nice one. I don't have to kill children. C: Uh-uh-uh- A: If you kill him, then the world gets a reprieve and Heaven does not have blood on its hands. C: Oh, no blood on your hands? That's a bit holier-than-thou, isn't it? A: I am a great deal holier than thou. That's the whole point.

That is when Crowley first tries to leave. But Aziraphale asks him not to, so he doesn't.

C: This is ridiculous. You are ridiculous. I don't even know why I'm still talking to you. A: Well, frankly, neither do I. C: Enough, I'm leaving. A: You can't leave, Crowley. There isn't anywhere to go. C: It's a big universe. Even if this all ends up in a puddle of burning goo, we can go off together.

Crowley tries to talk to Aziraphale. He tries to communicate. Aziraphale refuses to listen. He doubles down. He says terribly hurtful things to Crowley and he is the one to end things. That is when Crowley leaves for real:

A: Go off together? Listen to yourself. C: How long have we been friends? Six thousand years! A: Friends? We're not friends. We are an angel and a demon. We have nothing whatsoever in common, I don't even like you! C: You do! A: Even if I did know where the Antichrist was, I wouldn't tell you, we're on opposite sides! C: We're on our side! A: There is no "our side", Crowley! Not anymore. It's over. C: Right. Well, then. Have a nice doomsday.

Crowley was 100% in the right. He stays as long as Aziraphale is willing to talk. Right up until "It's over."

This is a direct parallel to their fight over Gabriel in s2e1. Crowley imo is once again being far more reasonable about it than Aziraphale.

Angel, this is the supreme archangel of all Heaven, your former boss, who tried very hard to cast you into hellfire and destroy you. He is not our friend.

There are similarities where Aziraphale wants to keep trying to help others while Crowley prioritizes protecting himself and Aziraphale. It's more murky here than in the bandstand scene because at the bandstand, Azriaphale is withholding crucial information from Crowley. Crowley thinks they're out of options because it's the night before the apocalypse and he's left waiting for Shadwell to find the Antichrist. The setup with the Gabriel situation is more even about their different approaches.

But in the end it still comes down to the fact that what Crowley wants just doesn't matter.

A: Well, he doesn't have any friends, so he needs us. C: What I need is for him to be nowhere near me, and the precious, peaceful, fragile existence that I have carved out for myself here. A: I thought we carved it out for ourselves. C: So did I!

Aziraphale sees this as them working together, but it's not, and Crowley knows it. It's just Aziraphale's way or the highway. The way this fight ends, and the reason Crowley leaves this time is:

A: Very well. If you refuse to help me, then of course... you're at liberty to go. C: To go? Oh, right, this is how you wanna do it? A: No, I would love you to help me. I'm asking you to help me take care of him. But if you won't, you won't. C: Yeah, I won't. You're on your own with this one.

Once again, it isn't just Crowley unilaterally deciding to leave. Just like at the bandstand, Aziraphale is the one drawing the line in the sand. Crowley can either give Aziraphale exactly what Aziraphale wants, or there's no point in talking about it at all. What Crowley wants just is not a factor to Aziraphale.

And Crowley recognizes this pattern. They've done this before! "This is how you wanna do it?" Aziraphale comes off so sleazy here. I don't think he means to be manipulative, but he really is. He would ~love~ for Crowley to help him; he would love for Crowley to help him take care of Gabriel. But if Crowley doesn't give Aziraphale what he wants, then Crowley is the one choosing not to help. Right? If Crowley "refuses to help", he is "at liberty to go".

Crowley's concerns about their safety aren't worth discussing at all. Aziraphale won't budge. Crowley leaves.

(And Aziraphale is arguably straight-up taking advantage of the fact that Crowley likes to help him here. He knows how much Crowley wants to help him. "Rescuing me makes him so happy.")

Anyway, they then continue to play out the same pattern as before.

After the bandstand fight, Crowley kills time at the movies. Hastur and Ligur confronts him about losing the Antichrist. They are out of time. Crowley goes back to Aziraphale.

C: Angel! I'm sorry. I apologise. Whatever I said, I didn't mean it. Work with me, I'm apologising here. Yes? Good. Get in the car. A: What? No. C: The forces of Hell have figured out it was my fault. But we can run away together. Alpha Centauri. Lots of spare planets up there. Nobody would even notice us. A: Crowley, you're being ridiculous. Look, I-I-I'm quite sure if I can just– just reach the right people, then I can get all this sorted out. C: There aren't any right people. There's just God, moving in mysterious ways and not talking to any of us. A: Well, yes, and that is why I'm going to have a word with the Almighty, and then the Almighty will fix it.

Once again, Crowley's concerns about safety don't matter. He tells Aziraphale "The forces of Hell have figured out it was my fault" and Aziraphale does not address that at all. Aziraphale is too preoccupied with his deeply flawed perspective. Crowley can't convince him, so he leaves again:

C: That won't happen. You're so clever. How can somebody as clever as you be so stupid? A: I forgive you. C: Oh… I'm going home, Angel. I'm getting my stuff and I'm leaving. And when I'm off in the stars, I won't even think about you.

Now with s2, I am extremely curious to know how often Aziraphale has tried to weaponize forgiveness against Crowley. Like, Crowley is completely in the right about this. And it is such a shitty thing to say, it reinforces the idea that Aziraphale thinks he's better than Crowley. Crowley is a demon and Aziraphale is an angel and that power differential matters. It affects their relationship.

Anyway, the Gabriel fight. Things change when Beelzebub talks to Crowley. One difference is that Crowley is in a better position this time. Beelzebub makes him an offer: "You find Gabriel for me and you can have whatever your nasty little heart desires. You could be a Duke of Hell." And Crowley doesn't even consider it, which is correct and the best approach because Hell and Heaven both suck. It is also extremely sad fresh off the heels of Crowley trying to protect the fragile existence he carved out for himself because he can't even seem to convince himself that him and Aziraphale are on their side at this point. Crowley is just going it alone.

That's beside the point. The point is, once again, the stakes raise. "Anyone found involved in Gabriel's disappearance will be erased from the Book of Life. They won't just be gone, they will never have existed." Crowley, naturally immediately rushes back to Aziraphale.

This difference in framing is notable, that this isn't Hell coming out after Crowley again. More of the danger is on Aziraphale this time. Crowley could, in theory, stay out of it and let Aziraphale deal with the consequences of his actions. But instead, Crowley does the same thing as last time. He apologizes when he doesn't mean it, now complete with dance. Aziraphale doesn't concede an inch. There's another difference here in that Crowley doesn't try to explain his perspective this time. He doesn't tell Aziraphale about the Book of Life and I don't blame him. He has zero reason to believe that it would sway Aziraphale.

Crowley adapts to Aziraphale's plan and tries to come up with the best way to protect Gabriel since they can't just get rid of him. Once again, Aziraphale won. They're doing it Aziraphale's way. We all saw last time how that went up in literal flames and the trauma this approach caused Crowley specifically.

S2 digs in on this problem with their relationship. After this, that Aziraphale commandeers the Bentley, again overriding Crowley's wishes. They aren't tackling the problem together. At some point, to whatever extent, it's just Aziraphale using Crowley. He takes Crowley for granted.

And Crowley enables this dynamic. He can't stay away. Aziraphale is his only friend and the loneliness seems to bother him more than it bothers Aziraphale. So Aziraphale takes advantage and is never forced to reflect on how he treats Crowley because it never really affects him in the end. Aziraphale gets what he wants and Crowley is the one to suffer for it.

At the end of the season, this same fight plays out only worse. Crowley is told to ~just communicate better~. This approach makes sense to an extent with the framing that they had to hide their relationship for millennia, so it's only relatively recently that they really could have communicated openly. But it also stings when the things Crowley is trying to communicate here are fundamentally the same things that he said before at the bandstand.

And the framing of this one really drives home the fact that Aziraphale is in the wrong. It starts with Aziraphale dismissing Crowley right off the bat:

C: It's probably best if I start off doing all the talking, you do all the listening, 'cause if I don't start talking now, I won't ever start talking, right? Yes, so... A: What's that lovely human expression? Oh, yes! Hold that thought. You see, I… I have some incredibly good news to give you. C: Really?

The look on Crowley's face when he says "Really?" gives me life, he is legit so fed up. Anyway, Aziraphale explains Metatron's offer. The Metatron is blatantly lying to him, but Aziraphale has a consistent and disturbing lack of self awareness: "You're a leader, you're honest, you don't just tell people what they want to hear." Bet. But he eats it up.

Then this happens:

A: You could come back to Heaven and... and everything, like the old times. Only, even nicer. C: Right. And you told him just where he could stick it, then? A: Not at all. C: Oh, we're better than that, you're better than that, Angel!

This time, Aziraphale is in favor of "our side". Why wouldn't he be? He got Heaven's seal of approval for it - under the condition that Crowley joins him. And Aziraphale doesn't even think about it. It isn't just that he's brainwashed and convinced that this is for the best. It's that it doesn't even seem to occur to him that Crowley wouldn't be happy. They've been arguing about their different perspectives for millennia. Aziraphale should at least be aware that Crowley wouldn't want this. Crowley has made his feelings about it all very clear, but for whatever reason, Aziraphale assumes that Crowley is going to see this as a good thing.

They rehash the bandstand fight:

C: You don't need them. I certainly don't need them! Look, they asked me back to Hell, I said no. I'm not gonna be joining their team. Neither should you. A: But... Well, obviously you said no to Hell, you're the bad guys. But Heaven… Well, it's the side of truth, of light, of good.

(Once again, Heaven is superior. Heaven never has blood on its hands.)

C: When Heaven ends life here on Earth, it'll be just as dead as if Hell ended it. Tell me you said no. A: [silence] C: Tell me you said no. A: If I'm in charge… I can make a difference.

They are beat-for-beat rehashing the bandstand fight. This is something s2 makes clear about Aziraphale with the flashbacks: Aziraphale backslides. He learns better, then he backtracks. He sees a bit of gray in his black-and-white world, but he can't hold onto it. He polarizes problems and deludes himself into living in this rose-colored fantasy world. Whatever Aziraphale learned during the apocalypse about their side, him and Crowley being fundamentally the same, Heaven being just as bad as Hell - none of it sticks. So they have to go through it again.

It's at this point that Crowley makes his love confession. He doesn't seem to think it'll work, but he tries anyway. He tries to communicate. He says a lot of things, and they aren't all true. He's still trying to see this relationship as better than it is I think. This is some of what he says:

I didn't get a chance to say what I was going to say, I think I'd better say it now. I could always rely on you. You could always rely on me. We're a team, a group. Group of the two of us. And we've spent our existence pretending that we aren't. I mean, the last few years, not really. We don't need Heaven, we don't need Hell, they're toxic. We need to get away from them, just be an us. You and me, what do you say?

Crowley spills his heart. They don't have the apocalypse looming over them this time. He isn't being pushed to latch onto Aziraphale out of fear as the world ends. He knows what he wants and he says it.

Aziraphale's counteroffer is:

Come with me... to Heaven. I'll run it, you can be my second in command. We can make a difference.

This time, Aziraphale is more on board. This time, they can be together, on their side - but on under Aziraphale's terms. Only under the delusion that Heaven is the "right" side. And even then, Crowley will never be Aziraphale's equal in this. He will always have to defer to Azriaphale's orders when it comes down to it.

At the bandstand, Aziraphale says: "You can't leave. There isn't anywhere to go." That's when Crowley first suggests running away to the stars, first proposes their side. This time, Crowley is the one who wants Aziraphale to stay.

C: You can't leave this bookshop. A: Oh, Crowley. Nothing lasts forever.

The way this next bit plays out is so important to me, so I'm adding cues and editorializing a bit:

C: No. No, I don't suppose it does. [puts on glasses] Good luck. [walks towards the door] A: Good luck? Crowley! Crowley, come back - [Crowley stops, turns to face him] - to Heaven! A: Work with me! We can be together! Angels... doing good! C: [says nothing. doesn't leave] A: [getting desperate] I... I need you! C: [doesn't react. doesn't believe him? still doesn't leave. hears him out] A: [switches tactics] I don't think you understand what I'm offering you! C: I understand. I think I understand a whole lot better than you do. A: Well... then there's nothing more to say.

Crowley gives Aziraphale every single chance. Crowley is a flawed, fucked up individual with his own biases, but he does see reality a whole lot better than Aziraphale. Aziraphale deludes himself and Crowley is the one who suffers for it. And once again, it isn't just Crowley deciding to leave. It's Aziraphale telling him to go. From "There is no "our side", not anymore, it's over" to "Well then there's nothing more to say."

But it still doesn't end there. Crowley doesn't just leave. This is how it ends:

C: Listen. Do you hear that? A: I don't hear anything. C: That's the point. No nightingales. You idiot. We could have been... us. [kisses Aziraphale] A: I… I forgive you. C: Don't bother.

That's when Crowley finally leaves.

Before, he ended it with: "I'm getting my stuff and I'm leaving. And when I'm off in the stars, I won't even think about you." He then did not leave for the stars. He stayed on Earth and confronted Hastur and Ligur with Holy Water and bought Aziraphale just a little bit more time to come around. Crowley never followed through on his own plans for what he thought was best. He always stayed, always waited for Aziraphale, at any cost.

At the end of s2, Aziraphale leaves Earth without Crowley.

The point of all of this that, yes, Crowley is always the one who walks out of their fights. But it isn't a problem of him being too stubborn about his beliefs, or not communicating his feelings well enough, or giving up too easily. The problem is that Aziraphale doesn't listen to him and doesn't respect him.

The last time they talk in season 2, they fight. Crowley leaves. I think and hope he'll stay away this time. Aziraphale can be the one to face the consequences of his actions this time.

[skadren]

2, 3, 6, and 8 for Tseeve~

send me a ship and a number and i'll tell you:

2. what their love letters look like

i don't think tseng has ever written a love letter before in his life. that is both way too easily perceived and way too impermanent at the same time. what if someone else finds it? what if it gets lost or thrown away or burned before reeve reads it?? what if reeve reads it??? his love letters are grocery store shopping lists stuck to the fridge and reminders for reeve to take his medications and protein bars and hot coffee "coincidentally" left on reeve's desk

reeve has diary entries. sometimes they are addressed to tseng: small jokes, the highlights and low points of his day, his current projects, proposal plans. wedding plans. reeve is a planning kind of guy, for everything. and before they got together, definitely pining. all the pining. he also has at least five separate entries wondering about tseng's hair care routine. his meetings notes may or may not be found with their initials doodled all around the borders (with ample questioning over what tseng's last name is. is tseng even his real name? is reeve a bad boyfriend for not knowing?? but wouldn't asking be an invasion of boundaries???)

3. which one outlives the other, and how they cope

both of them expect to die before the other. reeve because of how many goddamn medications he has to take and that must be terrible for his liver, and also he's older so that's how it works, right? tseng because of his line of work, and later on after he retires, because of the lingering issues from his past injuries. and the real reason is that neither of them want to think too hard on what it might actually be like to go on alone.

unfortunately tseng dies first. you can blame @takenbynumbers for that one. you know what you did

reeve puts on a pretty good attempt at going on outwardly unaffected, although he finally retires and passes on the seat of commissioner to someone else, like he'd been saying he would do for ages now. but he's never been very good at remembering to take care of himself; tseng is always the one who bossed him into doing it. so he sort of just... gives up on it?

(vincent accuses him of just giving up and waiting to die. reeve doesn't think he's wrong.)

6. how they decorate their bedroom

neither of them are big on excess so i guess it would be a pretty... normal? bedroom? there is a bed. big enough to fit both of them but not too big, because what if one of them gets lonely at night? the bed itself isn't anything fancy; sturdy and comfortable with enough support for reeve's back. plain sheets. they have two sets of blankets that are horribly mismatched because one reminds reeve of the quilts his ma liked to make and the other is a gift from yuffie that tseng will never admit is the exact same pattern of blanket he remembers his mom using when he was a child.

they both have a nightstand but desks are banned from the bedroom. deskwork is also banned from the bedroom. not that it keeps reeve from trying to sneak paperwork once in a while.

cait also has a cat bed in one corner (even though he really does not need a bed on account of the whole robot thing). he gets exiled regularly but it works out because he does not want to see his dads getting it on, thank you very much.

8. what they argue about

reeve always tosses his clothes in the general direction of the laundry hamper and misses. tseng's hair clogs the shower and gets all over the floor all the time. tseng hates taking out the trash and reeve never remembers to do it.

more seriously, even if their dedication to their work is something they have in common, neither of them like how little free time it gives them to spend together. it can lead to arguments over exactly how much the other person prioritizes their relationship at all, especially since the way they express their feelings and validation for one another is very different-- reeve's love language is physical affection and verbal affirmation, while tseng's is acts of service. coupled with how reticent tseng is about talking about feelings at all, it can lead to reeve feel like he's lovebombing tseng to little response, while tseng feels like he's never good enough at reciprocating properly.

but their biggest argument of all time is still the one that takes place directly after the turks drop the plate. there is a lot of broken trust between them regarding whether their relationship was as meaningful as reeve really thought it was, how much tseng has been hiding all this time, whether reeve wanted to be with tseng at all or just an idealized version of him. i fondly refer to the entire time they spend separated until they get back together postcanon as their divorce arc.

[satans-helper]

Smother the Flame in Your Heart - Part VII

Read previous parts here or read on Ao3

Pairing: Danny Wagner x Sam Kiszka

Word Count: ~3600

Warnings: vampire stuff; brief smut

Hope this was worth the wait ;)

---

For the first time in a long time, life was good for Danny. He felt genuinely content almost all the time now–it didn’t matter what happened at work or with his family or the little issues with the apartment that, until very recently, had felt akin to a prison. His entire existence felt lighter now with Sam in the picture and that wasn’t something Danny had ever anticipated or expected from any relationship. But, he realized, that may have been because none of his other relationships had involved what he was sure was nothing short of a soulmate. Perhaps hokey and overly romanticized, but it was true–Sam was his soulmate. Sam challenged him, helped him have fun, listened to him, shared with him, explored with him. All the things that Danny wanted and he didn’t have to hide one single part of himself. Sam accepted and loved him as a whole being. It was a real, whole relationship.

Including real dates, which Danny found himself enjoying far more than he ever had in the past. Definitely because it was with Sam, but also because Sam liked doing just about anything–Danny never had to think too hard or plan too much. The bonus being nearly every date ended with sex–Sam was insatiable. 

Almost as insatiable as Danny, but he was doing an excellent job at holding back no matter how much Sam encouraged him to just let go and give into his ultimate desires. He thought, anyway. There’d been nothing even close to a slipup. However, when the Kiszkas roped him into a little weekend road trip to what Josh called “the big city” for Sam’s birthday, Danny knew it was another massive hurdle. Every time he was with all of them, the urges crawling in his brain began to scream.

Sam, as usual, could feel the tension emanating from Danny, both in his energy and in how tightly he was holding himself while they sat in the backseat of Josh’s car. He held Danny’s hand, both trying to keep his boyfriend grounded but also himself. He couldn’t help it–he kept getting jealous. Each time Danny went off to get his fix with someone else, seething envy, hot anger and even some dark, twisted despair brewed in his body and mind. Worse was that each time Danny was with his brothers, that envy and betrayal grew until it felt like vines wrapping around his heart, squeezing tight. 

He never wanted to upset Danny but bottling his emotions was unnatural for Sam. Sometimes, mostly because Danny wouldn’t even outright tell him why he was heading out of town for a night, Sam wanted to throw an actual tantrum. He wanted to demand his boyfriend go to him for absolutely everything no matter what, because Sam could handle it, because Sam wanted it. But Danny was skilled in self-control, so Sam tried to be too, time and time again. 

It got better once the ride was over. Walking through the streets of the city, popping into shops, revisiting museums, lunch, drinks–all of it was good. Very good, actually, and Sam felt a conscious, profound sense of gratitude for his life. For his brothers, his whole family, and now Danny. He could hardly believe that it was going on six months that he’d had a real, actual boyfriend, the sort of person that was better than he’d ever imagined. Stranger than he’d ever imagined too, but that was partly why he loved Danny so much. Beyond the whole vampire thing, Danny was an unabashed dorky weirdo. He never took himself too seriously but he took the important things in life seriously. Danny took him seriously and Sam knew that Danny prioritized his happiness more than his own, something that was incredibly novel and curious. Sam always had a bit of a hedonistic streak–instead of Danny faulting him for it, he encouraged it. He knew that for a fact when Danny gave him his birthday gifts–a sizable bag of incredible smelling weed and a whole slew of different edibles. 

“Holy shit,” Josh remarked, leaning over the table so far that it looked like his entire upper body was going to make contact with their half-eaten plates of sandwiches and their beers. “Look at that haul.” He looked at both Sam and Danny while he sat back down. “Sammy, you really hit the jackpot with this one.” 

Sam sidled up against Danny, wrapping his arm around his shoulders. “I really fucking did.” He propped his chin on Danny’s shoulder, staring at his profile. “Thanks, Daniel. You know me so well. Should we start now?”

“You’re the birthday boy,” Danny told him, bringing his hand to Sam’s thigh beneath the table. He really couldn’t have thought of anything better for a birthday than to indulge his favorite stoner; based on the looks on Josh and Jake’s faces as well, it seemed like a good choice.

“Sam, put it all back in the bag,” Jake said, nudging the bag of weed closer to his younger brother. “It may be legal, but someone here might kill for that if they see it.”

Sam rolled his eyes but eased Jake’s worries by putting it all back in the gift bag, fluffing the tissue paper back over everything. He was totally content to keep this all to himself and Danny, but then Danny asked, “We could all smoke together later, right?” 

Danny knew asking would surprise Sam with how pointedly he’d limited his time with Sam’s brothers. But he was tired of having to avoid them. He liked Josh and Jake a lot and if this relationship was going to continue–and he was certain it was–he needed to keep pushing himself. 

“We could hot-box,” Josh offered, then tapped his chin in thought. “Or we could just devour some of those edibles in the hotel.” 

“How about both?” Sam replied before finishing off his beer. “We need more drinks too.” He was not above taking full advantage of the fact that his brothers were paying for all of this–they wouldn’t let Danny chip in, though Sam did see his boyfriend try to slip Jake a couple twenties once they were back outside, which Jake silently, fervently declined to accept. 

Danny had done good with his weed. It was strong and easy, the high making him sink into the backseat instead of stiffening against it; all four of them were passing a bowl around in the hotel parking lot, the windows fogged with smoke and body heat, the music from the stereo a comforting loop in Danny’s ears. He leaned heavily against Sam, who leaned right back, the two of them pressed so close together that it actually became awkward to try and pass the bowl back and forth when their turns came around.

As all birthdays should go in his mind, Sam was sufficiently fucked up. He’d drank more than anyone else all day–throw all the weed on top of that, then the edibles he and Danny had chowed down on in their hotel room and he felt like the whole world was spinning. Not in a bad way, not like he was going to get sick–actually, he felt amazing. The hotel room now held a deep fascination, like the drab walls were newly glimmering in the evening light cutting through the wide window and the bed beneath him felt exceptionally plush. But the best thing was the weight of Danny pressing down next to him.

“Happy birthday, Sammy,” Danny said, feeling pretty fucked up himself but also relieved. He’d been dying for some time alone with the birthday boy all day no matter how much fun he’d been having with the twins. He curled an arm around Sam’s back and pulled him in to kiss his soft cheek, and Sam laughed and cupped Danny’s face to kiss him properly. 

Sam crawled into his lap, straddling him, gazing into his beautiful eyes that reflected every forest and every sunset Sam had ever experienced. “You got me the perfect gifts,” he purred, and Danny beamed. “But I thought of something I want even more.”

Danny grabbed Sam’s ass, kneading it like a cat. “Oh yeah? What would that be?”

Sam’s desires spilled freely, his mind uninhibited: “I wanna be the only one, Danny. I wanna be the person you go to for everything.”

Danny’s hands ceased their movements. “Everything?”

Sam nodded, toying with Danny’s hair. “Yeah. Everything. I don’t like that you go out and get your fix from randos,” he said, squirming a little with an onset of nerves. Danny was looking at him with so much suspicion and trepidation. “I never liked it.” Emotion made his voice thicker, more raw; he could feel the change in his own facial expression too, desperation and pain in his eyes. “I really fucking hate it, actually.”

“Sam–” Danny began to say, but he wasn’t sure how to explain himself in the state he was in, so all he finished with was, “I’m sorry.”

Sam scoffed, clasping his hands around the back of Danny’s neck. “Don’t be sorry. Just give me what I want. It’s what you want too. Am I wrong?” 

“Oh Sam,” came as a soft reply from Danny. He never wanted to hurt Sam physically or emotionally. But not hurting him physically was hurting him emotionally. He didn’t know how to wrap his head around it. “Yeah, I want that. But even without that one part, you are my everything. I don’t wanna hurt you.” He sighed and clasped Sam’s forearms. “I love you.”

“I know,” Sam replied, unfazed–he’d felt that love for Danny so long that hearing the words for the first time, especially in the state he was in, weren’t earth-shattering like they were in romance novels and movies. He knew Danny loved him and Sam loved Danny in return, but in his mind, the most significant act of devotion would be the one thing Danny kept denying. “I love you too, Danny. Can’t we give this to one another?”

Danny fought, he really did. He sat there with Sam on top of him for what felt like a lifetime but was probably no longer than a minute, trying to hold fast to the desire–the promise he’d made to himself–of never hurting Sam again. But Sam looked so defeated, the hope of his own unfulfilled desire dashed, and Danny couldn’t take that either. 

“Okay,” he said finally, and light returned to Sam’s eyes. “But are you really sure about this?” Danny was trembling, hands shakily moving down to Sam’s waist. “I won’t be able to live with myself if we do this and–”

Sam covered Danny’s mouth with his hand. “I’m sure. You know I haven’t stopped thinking about this. You’ve gone out every week to drink someone else’s blood. I can’t take it anymore.” He let all his weight drop on top of Danny; Danny could feel that both of them were hard beneath their pants and tense everywhere else. “So–you ready?”

Danny nodded and Sam took his hand away. “Just a little bit, Sam. It’s not even gonna be like last time, alright?” In response, Sam just kissed him again, hard and fierce; Danny wrapped his arms around his boyfriend and kissed back just the same. The scent of pot, alcohol, sweat and Sam himself floated freely and Danny gave himself permission to indulge in it, quickly breaking away from Sam’s mouth to inhale deeply behind his ear. His lips trailed down the long, graceful neck; he tugged on Sam’s shirt to expose as much of his collarbone and shoulder that he could and pressed soft kisses there, making Sam sigh and begin to play with Danny’s hair again.

“God, you really do smell good,” Danny told him. With his eyes closed, it was all touch and scent, and he felt even drunker on Sam alone. He leaned back to pull Sam’s shirt over his head and brought his heated palms back to that body as Sam shivered.

It was the chill of the room’s a/c that made him shiver but also the weight of knowing what was going to happen. Sam really did want it. He’d wanted it every day since it had first happened. But there was still a little fear nonetheless–not that Danny would actually hurt him, but the fear of Danny retreating again after the fact. Inadvertently, he was holding his breath while Danny explored his torso with hands and lips, then the warm, wet tongue to lick Sam’s collarbones as fingers toyed with his nipples.

Sam’s unusual silence made Danny even more nervous; he met Sam’s dark eyes again, his hands petting the thin, sharp ribs beneath his palms. “Sammy–you good?”

“You gotta promise me something,” Sam said before he could allow himself to neglect those thoughts any longer. He put his hands on Danny’s shoulders and straightened his back. “Promise me that, y’know, after this–you won’t run away. You won’t break up with me. No dramatics. Okay?”

“Even if I hated myself after this, I couldn’t stay away from you,” Danny assured him, the truth thick and poignant in his heart as he spoke each word. 

“Good,” Sam added, giving one short-lived grind of his crotch against Danny’s. “Don’t.” 

Danny groaned quietly, almost silently, and nuzzled his face into Sam’s sternum. “So can I? Like you are totally, absolutely, one hundred percent sure?”

“For fuck’s sake, Daniel,” Sam barked, impatient now that he had all the affirmation he needed, and yanked on a fistful of dark hair. “Be a fucking vampire for five fucking minutes.”

Danny laughed. “Okay,” he said, pressing one hand to the back of Sam’s neck to bring him down a bit, so he could finally allow his lips to press against the sweet-smelling, tender flesh. “Okay, okay. Here we go.” There he went indeed. He cupped the back of Sam’s head, fingers threading through long silky hair, as he relaxed his jaw, opening his mouth to make full contact. Sam wiggled in his lap and latched his hands to Danny’s back, bringing himself even closer–doing what he said he wanted. Giving himself over. And Danny went with it, finally pressing his teeth–canines included–low on Sam’s neck, his chin pressed against a collarbone. 

It hurt, no doubt about it. Sam winced and whimpered but stayed right there, not that he had much of a choice–Danny had an iron grip on his entire body from the hand in his hair to the arm wrapped around his middle, keeping them tethered together. But the sharp shock of the bite withered quickly to a buzzing sort of sting, but even that was shielded by the warmth of Danny’s mouth and the gentle press of his tongue while he sucked the blood straight from Sam’s veins. If he really thought about it for a second too long, it did seem super fucked up, Sam felt, but the way Danny hummed in ecstasy and exhaled against him surmounted that too. 

Danny gave himself only a few seconds really, he figured, and it was painful to stop. But that was enough. The scent that had evolved into taste, the weight of blood in his mouth and the heat of it down his throat was enough even from those few seconds. He pulled back and refused to let himself study the wound–it was temporary. Sam was okay. They were both okay, so Danny slowly licked his tongue over the little tooth punctures and didn’t wait to watch the strange healing process. He just took Sam’s face in his hands and kissed him with all the gratitude swelling in his chest and when Sam kissed him back, knowingly and willingly tasting his own blood on Danny’s tongue, Danny grunted against his mouth, hips stuttering beneath Sam’s body as he abruptly came.

“Shit,” he muttered, eyes still closed as he created a few inches of space between them. He felt so many things at once, from the heavy high from the weed he was riding through to the even heavier high from Sam, but for the first time, Danny didn’t feel the weight of shame bearing down on him. 

Fully distracted now by Danny coming in his pants just from drinking his blood and kissing him, Sam felt no pain at all. He brought Danny’s mouth back to his own, murmuring, “It’s okay” before slipping his tongue back into his wildly sweet vampire boyfriend’s mouth. 

Danny rolled Sam over onto his back and crawled between his legs, propped up on his hands. He lifted one to brush Sam’s hair back, inspecting. “Are you okay?” he asked, ignoring the weirdly unresolved ache in his groin and the uncomfortable wet spot there. 

Sam reached up to touch his neck–it felt hot and sore but, again, free of any actual remnants of carnage. “I’m okay. I’m great, actually,” he said with a rough laugh, flopping his arms out at his sides. “We gave each other what we wanted.”

“And I–” Danny began, looking down at himself while he palmed his groin. “Totally fucking embarassed myself.”

Sam sat up on his elbows. “No, you didn’t.” He reached a hand out, fingers slipping beneath Danny’s waistband. “That’s fucking hot, Danny. You came ‘cause you got so excited.”

Danny breathed out slowly and crawled forward, hair hanging in Sam’s face. “I came because you’re so into it. You tasted your own blood,” he admitted, expecting to feel all that hot shame flood his veins once more but, again, it didn’t come. Instead, he was enveloped by his boyfriend’s warm, loving arms and kissed all over, until his own neck was burning red beneath Sam’s lips. 

Sam giggled. “I didn’t do that on purpose.” He mouthed against Danny’s throat while his hands roamed beneath his shirt, feeling the hard abs and the coarse hair that drove him as wild as every other part of Danny did. He dug his fingertips into Danny’s sides when another warm hand cupped his bulge. “Ooh, yeah–do that on purpose.”

Danny chuckled. Satiated and subdued, he could totally let go–well, he could fully let go after he addressed the lingering issue. “Sammy–we gotta rewind a bit,” he said, sitting back on Sam’s thighs. Sam stayed quiet, looking a touch wary, so Danny tried to run a reassuring hand down his waist. “As much as I wish I could just get this from you all the time, I can’t. It wouldn’t be safe. Seriously.” He swallowed, waiting for the inevitable blowback, but Sam just kept looking at him, breathing evenly. “You’re always gonna be my number one, alright? But there are gonna be times where I have to go find ‘randos.’ That’s the only way it’ll work. It’s the only way we’ll be okay.”

Sam sighed. He’d expected as much. “I get it,” he said, lacing his fingers through Danny’s, then he tugged him forward. “Just as long as you always come to me first.”

Danny smiled. “Always, baby. Now can I make you come?”

Sam brought Danny’s hand back down to his crotch. “Please do.”

With a great amount of love burning in his heart, Danny began that quest. He spent a long time with his mouth roaming across Sam’s upper body, kissing, biting and licking until his boyfriend was nearly thrashing against the bed and overtly begging for more. Then he got Sam naked and long fingers tangled in Danny’s hair as he went down on him, pouring all of his newly found energy into sucking, licking and stroking just the way his boyfriend liked–and demanded–it.

More than being stoned, Sam felt like the wind got knocked out of him after he came. Trying to catch his breath, he pulled Danny up by the shirt that was still on him and kissed him–the taste of his own cum wasn’t as good as the taste of blood, but Sam could taste Danny behind it all. He could feel him too, the entire weight of and length of his body on top, and Sam thought that he wanted to escape into that forever. He wanted Danny with him, on him, all over him forever. 

“Thank you,” Sam said. It was probably the most sincere “thank you” he’d ever said in his life. Danny kissed him again, smiling, before he rolled over, draping one arm and one leg over him. Sam could do better than that though–he climbed over Danny and clung to him like wet paper. “Best birthday ever.”

Danny was wishing he’d taken off his clothes, especially because his boxers were full-on sticking to his crotch. “Did you get everything you wanted?”

Sam nodded against his chest. “Fucking finally. You gotta keep your promise.”

“I will. I don’t break promises.”

“I know you don’t. But this is the most important one.” 

“I know it is, baby,” Danny assured him, stroking his hands down Sam’s back. It wasn’t even late–they both needed a shower and to hit the town again for dinner. He wanted to treat Sam to wherever and whatever he wanted. He was sure Sam could use some extra fuel now, and he felt he needed to further assess before that happened, particularly when he noticed the blooming violet and red bruise on his neck: “Did it hurt?”

“A little. Not too bad.” Sam sighed as if he had nowhere else to be ever again, a dead weight on top of Danny. The lingering pain was nothing compared to the bliss he felt. “Like anything else, I bet the more we do it, the less it will hurt.”

“Like sex.”

Sam snorted. “Exactly, Daniel.”

---

Tagging: @mackalah @sparrowofrhiannon @starbuggie @lightsofthe-living-gvf @sanguinebats @gvfrry @milojames16 @clairesjointshurt @bizzielisteningtogreta

If you'd like to be tagged in any of my fics, you can go here or DM me :)

[ellakomskaikru]

Zuko betrayed Mai when he left her locked inside a prison cell and Mai still saved his ungrateful ass. The bastard didn’t even talk about her even once after that. And I’m supposed to believe he loves her? Yeah right. He was a horrible boyfriend to her and he would be a horrible boyfriend to Katara too. I hate both Maiko and Zutara for Mai and Katara’s sakes. Zuko should not be inflicted on any girl.

Hello anon!

I disagree that Zuko betrayed Mai. Mai was the one who chose to come to the Boiling Rock just to yell at Zuko for breaking up with her, which endangered the mission he was on. Mai was the niece of the warden and as a prominent noblewoman her presence there would attract attention and by default to Zuko. Mai did not want to understand Zuko’s perspective as when he literally told her, “Stop! This isn’t about you, it’s about the Fire Nation!” Her reply was, “Thanks Zuko, that makes me feel all better.” She didn’t care about the atrocities her nation was committing, all she cared about was the fact that Zuko dumped her.

Mai does seem to grudgingly listen to Zuko after he tells her “That’s not how I see it.” But we didn’t see their full conversation or Mai’s reaction to Zuko explaining why he’s doing what he’s doing. The next time we saw them she was frowning at him, which insinuates that she still didn’t agree with his reasons. Because of this, Zuko probably deduced that Mai was a danger to the completion of the mission, which is why he locked her inside the cell. And he also probably figured that she would be safe in the cell because her uncle was literally the warden of the prison anyways.

So no, Zuko did not betray Mai. Mai was an obstacle to what he set out to do, so he removed her from his path so he could finish his mission without interference. A lot was at stake there, and he is not a jerk for prioritizing getting the prisoners out of the Boiling Rock and ending the war over Mai. Yes, Mai saving Zuko was very brave and the right thing to do. Yes, Zuko should have mentioned her afterwards and he didn’t, which also makes it hard for me to believe that he loves her at all. Their relationship was not convincing at all.

But before that, Zuko was not a horrible boyfriend to her. He had one moment of explosive jealousy, and was rightfully called out for it. But he was thoughtful. He got her a shell because he was trying to please her and she sarcastically rejected it. How is he supposed to know what she likes if she doesn’t tell him? He hasn’t seen her for three years. Mai was not obligated to like the shell, but she should have at least appreciated that her boyfriend was trying to do something nice for her. He also went to get her food without complaint when she literally ordered him to at the party. Then in Nightmares and Daydreams, Zuko does his best to please her by ordering fruit tarts for her. Zuko wasn’t perfect, but he tried to make her happy when he himself was in a really bad place emotionally.

There’s also no evidence that he would be a horrible boyfriend to Katara. When Zuko was with Mai, he was pretending to be someone he wasn’t and was in some deep anxiety. He was not himself with her, and couldn’t be even if he wanted to. And yet still, he tried to make it work with her. When Zuko joins Team Avatar, he is finally his true self. And when he’s interacting with Katara he shows his real personality. He was respectful and supportive towards her. He truly wanted to make up for how he hurt her and was very supportive of her in The Southern Raiders. Zuko also protected her even when she was still angry with him, as he saved her from falling rocks and took the brunt of the fall so that she wouldn’t get hurt.

Zuko and Katara had a good friendship and they enjoyed spending time with each other. Zuko respected her as a fighter as he chose her to come fight Azula with him, and put her life before his own in The Final Agni Kai when Azula shot lightening at Katara and he took it for her instead. Therefore, I see no evidence that he would be a horrible boyfriend to Katara. I think he would always put her first and be supportive of her, and accept her entirely for who she is. Zuko is not perfect, even after his redemption, he has flaws. But he is a good person overall who is empathetic, thoughtful, and supportive. He tries his best and I think he’d make Katara happy. Katara would not have to coddle him and she would be able to be her full self with him.

You’re entitled to dislike Mai.ko and Zutara for whatever reasons, but this why I don’t agree with the view that Zuko is a horrible boyfriend.

Thanks for the ask!

[symbioticsimplicity]

@taddy-cat

You asked for the essay, you get the essay.

First and foremost, the premise of the show is that anyone, no matter how awful, can be redeemed. Based on that alone, there's already room for Alastor to make the cut. He would absolutely take the longest and I believe he'd be the last of the original cast to have done so, but I think its not only possible but plausible. From a writing perspective it would be brilliant should they carry it off.

But that's the Doylist answer, we're interested in the Watsonian one.

The first thing that makes me think so, is that we've already seen him change, in small ways, but its change nonetheless.

Turning away Mimzy, which while was most likely because he was trying to make Lucifer swallow the narrative that he was constructing, still showed him prioritizing the hotel.

Lending Charlie his Mic. THAT was a trust exercise. It didn't take place during one of the scheduled times, but make no mistake he placed a SHITTON of trust in Charlie then, he just didn't tell her. It was on his own terms, but like I said SMALL changes.

Threatening Husk. That sounds contradictory because how could threatening someone indicate a GOOD change? Because we very much have heard about Alastor being the type of person you don't fuck around with. People do everything they can to avoid him so much as NOTICING them. He's absolutely the type to kill without warning but he DIDN'T. He threatened because he LIKES Husk.

And of course him mentioning "One could become accustomed" to the rest of the Hazbin cast. First of all, that was right before a major battle, he could very well lose any of these people the next day. That's such a fond thing to say under those circumstances, especially for someone like him. (This is pure speculation, but remember what Mimzy said about him becoming a kitten after a drink or two?? What better time to drink than the eve before a major battle??? Alcohol loosens the tongue, ergo Alastor is an affectionate drunk. Honestly??? That would be fucking hilarious, and would explain why hes not visibly drunk around any of them despite liking alcohol)

Also!!! Rosie!!!! The fact that he DOES have the capacity for genuine friendship, however twisted, shows that he has the potential to cultivate even more relationships like those, perhaps in a healthier manner even.

That said, it will be HARD.

He will fight TOOTH AND NAIL. He is the embodiment of it gets worse before it gets better. He's gonna fuck up SO MUCH MORE before that even becomes a possibility. Because in order to get him to actually consciously make the decision to become better, he has to have remorse to work with. Right now Alastor feels none guilt about just about anything hes done up until this point. He's a monster and he knows and loves that about himself. He DOES have a moral code in there somewhere, its just wildly different than anyobody else's and he hasn't broken THAT once. He needs to be put in a position where he DOES.

Because for someone like him, redemption can't be an accident the way it was with Pentious. It needs to be an intentional goal that he has to work towards with the same kind of intensity he's put toward evil. And given the set up they have for him to betray the Hotel, I genuinely hope that's the catalyst. I hope its right after Charlie goes out of her way to do something genuinely meaningful for him (Like passing him a message from his Mother, because she sought her out while she was in Heaven. She knows how much he cares about her at that point, and made the effort to make contact and see if she could get smuggle a letter down for him. Maybe it even causes her some trouble too just to add fuel to the fire.)

But if that remorse were to begin, I think it would eat him alive. In the same way pain feels magnified when its not a frequent thing, Alastor has never felt guilt before so its crushing to him.

Alastor is also not the type of person to sit around and mope so after figuring out what the fuck is happening to him, he would be the type to force himself through whatever he thought necessary to deal with it. And the way to deal with it is to put himself through Charlie’s program.

He has to see his Mom, and he has to make things right.

And that fucker is driven.

[axewchao]

A recent ask got me thinking about references, and I could not, can't stress this enough, COULD NOT do anything other than work on this one ref for Real Worlder!Dal. Will probably end up doing Koopa!Dal next, if my itty bitty little pea brain refuses to let me focus on anything else =w=

~~~

Relaxed, patient, and observant, Dalex is more of a lover than a fighter, but that hasn't stopped him from becoming the third hero of the Mushroom Kingdom alongside Mario and Luigi. First arriving from the Real World at age 8, then returning again at age 15, he gained the title of "hero" after rescuing two children (whom he just so happened to be babysitting) that found their way to the Mushroom World and were captured by Bowser soon after. 

Dalex tends to be very shy around new faces, often resorting to an old, ingrained habit of waiting to be spoken to instead of starting a conversation on his own. He starts with brief replies, becoming more expressive and talkative as time passes, but also tries to stay polite in order to avoid any verbal (or physical) aggression. Others consider Dalex a good listener and are more likely to discuss personal topics with him due to his gentle demeanor.

At heart, he's a caretaker, and prioritizes the wellbeing of those around him before himself, particularly when it comes to children. He’s highly attuned to the suffering and/or pain of people around him, and will instinctively want to ease or heal their pain however he can. Of course, he’s well aware of personal boundaries, so he won’t reach out towards a stranger or acquaintance as much as he would a dear friend, child, or family member. Even then, he doesn’t want to be a meddler, and will back off when asked. Should he fail or otherwise be unable to help when given the chance, he may take a little too much responsibility and self-deprecate as a result.

Dalex has a near-crippling phobia of losing his own temper or setting off someone else's, which took root after he violently attacked a school bully at age 12. Things like anger or envy is damn near deadly in his eyes, and considering that he managed to hospitalize someone as a lanky 12-year-old kid, there's no telling what he might be able to do now that he's naturally older and stronger at age 22, even if he doesn't include his Shade Sprite and paintbrush, both of which are magical artifacts. It takes a lot to actually make Dalex snap, but once he does, take cover.

Trivia

He was born with brown hair and brown eyes, but they both turned purple after his Shade Sprite appeared at age 4. It's still unknown how it appeared in the Real World or who might've given it to him. The color change is actually a harmless side-effect of being exposed to unfamiliar magic for a long period, rendered permanent because Dalex always had it on him.

His eyes lacking pupils is from his dad's side of the family. Everyone in the Rathmore bloodline can see 'something' that's normally hard or otherwise impossible to see. Dal's "special sight" is Pain Perception, as hinted above. He isn't aware of this and believes his eyes are duds.

The single earring he wears is also from his dad. Said father, Luka Rathmore, wears the other earring on his right ear.

Originally, his Soul Sphere was another gift from the same person that gave him his Shade Sprite, but I'm considering rewriting this part to say that it's actually from his mom, who may have one of her own. We'll see ;3c

Dalex is considered the arch nemesis of Ludwig Von Koopa, but this is mostly one-sided on Ludwig's end. When the Koopaling in question isn't actively trying to antagonize him, he's very cordial, even willing to work alongside or otherwise help Ludwig depending on the situation.

He likes writing in his spare time and often makes up short stories depending on what he's experienced recently. Also keeps a dream journal. And a regular journal. And some extra blank journals so he never runs out of paper.

He always cries when he gets angry.

[miss-inkwell]

Abbott rewatch episode one thoughts/ analysis:

Abbott is still just as fun and funny the first time I watched it the characters are still charming and engaging. It also gives so much into Janine’s character early on along with our first Teddie scene!

So the episode starts with Janine of course because she is our main character. It’s showed pretty quickly that’s she’s optimistic and loves to teach but struggles with her kids. She has a hard time making her kids listen to her because she does not have as much power to control her students. It’s not that she’s a bad teacher she’s just not great at the discipline part yet while Barbara is.

Barbara gets them to sit down really quickly and this is also the start of us knowing Janine’s adoration for her. In this shot it’s a great way of showing how different they are based off of experience and age. Barbara is already unimpressed with Janine because young teachers like her leave very quickly and she hasn’t really done anything that has stood out to her. I’m really happy about the character growth we see from here on out to show that doesn’t see her as much of an annoyance as she once did.

These two pictures alone tell you so much about Janine’s character, she clinged onto her teachers from a young age onward. Barbara showcased the traits her kindergarten teacher had, kindness, a way with kids and an overall great demeanour. Janine clearly did not have a lot of friends growing up and since her mom did not parent her she clings to motherly authority figures like Barbara. It’s sad that this is because of the lack of love she got from her own mother.

Barbara and Melissa are more used to how things at Abbott aren’t going to change but Janine has not. She is an optimist who cares and wants what’s best no matter what. I love that about her but I also love that throughout the show while she’ll falter she will come back from it.

Now we meet the man himself Gregory Eddie I will forever love the hilarious introduction with Ava. A thing I’m sure most people have noticed is that he goes straight for the handshake with Jacob. The growth from that to the hug in the finale is so precious. Gregory is not the type of person who adapts easily to new situations and now he’s a sub to a school where he wanted to be the principal. I just love that he never planned on becoming a teacher and due to the teachers there especially Janine he stayed 🥰

Speaking of Janine this episode gives us our first Teddie scene! I loved it I loved how awkward it was because that just suits them. She literally walks in on him in the bathroom and thinks he’s a creep 😂. I think part of the gem of this scene is that due to how the school works and how crazy it is Gregory was the one lost. Janine had to take the lead here and take the kid and help him out. That was really nice and I also loved their introduction because they couldn’t even shake hands so she just tries to make a joke. I feel like due to Janine’s kindness and her taking the lead that made him feel comfortable in this strange environment. It did not hurt that he also thought she was very pretty look at that face he was smitten from day one!

Janine meanwhile needs a new rug for her kids and is frustrated that she can’t get a new one. She’s very much shown to care about the kids and to prioritize doing what she can for the school. A part of her also wants to impress Barbara because she wants her to take her under her wing. A huge part of who Janine is is someone who loves her job and wants to be accepted and loved by the people she looks up to. Janine cares a lot and wants to make change which is very admirable despite the ways she goes about it throughout the series.

Barbara is actually moved by how Janine’s motivation despite finding her too cheerful and annoying. I love that everyone was together and offered to pay for the rug despite having no money. The fact that she wanted the rug so bad because one of her students doesn’t get enough sleep so he sleeps there was so sweet. I love that the show shows how much they love their kids and how hard it is to be a teacher.

So with the help of Melissa’s guy they all get rugs which also leads to a second Teddie scene! When I tell you my heart exploded I actually forgot about this scene for a minute. It’s short and sweet like them just talking about the job and you can see that she likes him too. I feel like for her it was more he’s a nice guy and it’s nice to have new people around type of like. While Janine has liked him from the beginning I think the nail on the head of like liking him might hit later. They’re so soft and perfect together and he’s so loud here and so in love already 😻

Overall a great first episode not surprised at all and great insight into Janine as well as Janine and Gregory and I can’t wait to continue my rewatch

[zegrvshvghes]

Missing your love- AF19

God i love Adam so much, also bully me please. Tell me everything wrong with this i want feedback. I love this stupid little canadian.

check out my masterlist for more 💌

Adam fell madly in love with you. You two met when you were both in college and hit it off right away. You spent all your time together, laughing and exploring the city. Adam knew that he had found the one he wanted to spend the rest of his life with.

However, as time went on, things started to change. You became more focused on your career and less focused on your relationship. You would cancel plans last minute and seemed distant whenever you were together. Adam tried to talk to you about it, but you always brushed him off.

Weeks turned into months, Adam realized that he was falling out of love with you. He couldn't bear to be with someone who didn't prioritize the relationship. He felt like he was constantly making an effort while you were taking him for granted.

"I feel like we're not growing anymore. We haven't gotten any closer in the past few months, and it feels like we're just going through the motions."

You wiped your tears away and sat back on the couch. "I didn't know you felt this way," you said quietly.

"I'm sorry, I don't want to hurt you," Adam said. "I just don't think this is working anymore."

You sat there, thinking, for a long time. Finally, you looked up at Adam with a sad but determined look on your face. "I don't want to hold you back from happiness," you said. "I love you enough to let you go if that's what you need."

Adam breathed a sigh of relief. He had feared that you would be angry or defensive, but your understanding and willingness to let him go made him feel like he was making the right decision. "I love you too, I Always will," he said.

"It hurts, but I know we'll both be okay in the long run," You said, standing up from the couch. "I should go so we can both have some space to think."

Adam watched you leave, feeling guilty and sad but also a sense of freedom. He knew that he had made the right choice, even though it hurt.

It was a difficult decision, but Adam knew he had to end things with you. The thought of being with someone who he believed didn't love him back was unbearable. However, Adam knew deep down that he couldn't continue to put in all the effort without getting anything in return.

The breakup was tough on both of you, but he knew it was the right decision. He needed to find someone who would love him as much as he loved them, and who would prioritize their relationship just as much as he did.

He felt himself moving on. He started going out more, spent time on his hobbies, and even started dating a little bit. He felt like himself again, but he also knew that he would never forget you and the love you had once shared.

Weeks turned into months, and Adam eventually found someone who loved him just as fiercely as he loved them. Looking back on his relationship with you, he realized that falling out of love had been a necessary step towards finding true happiness.

He realized that he deserved someone who would love him and care for him, and he was able to find that person in the end. It just goes to show that everything happens for a reason, even when it hurts at the time.

Months later, Adam ran into you at your favourite coffee shop. You exchanged awkward hellos and caught up on how your lives had been over the time you had been apart.

"I think we needed this break," You said. "I've learned so much about myself and what I want in life."

Adam smiled at you, feeling a renewed sense of appreciation for the person you were. "Me too," he said.

You talked for a little while longer, and then it was time to say goodbye. This time, there were no tears or anger, just a sense of closure and understanding.

As Adam walked away, he felt grateful for the time he had spent with you and the lessons he had learned. Falling out of love had been hard, but it had been worth it to find himself and what he truly wanted in life.

[lasi-nariyoyoreads]

Suho, Baekhyun and Chanyeol's soulmate reading

SuBaekChan is the second group for this soulmate reading! I had a bit of a hard time to read into them, but the oracles cleared the situation a bit. It seems to me that tarot cards tell me what is the nature of their relationship while oracles describe more the overall vibe or evolution of their relationship, so really it was helpful to pick more cards.

Disclaimer:

My readings are made for fun and you should read them for fun too. So don't take them seriously.

Suho

Cards: 3 of pentacles, king of swords, ace of cups, gift, poverty, chance

I think this person is someone that taught him something like a teacher or simply someone who has more experience than him in a certain field.

This person is very rational and level headed and they teach and inspire Suho. I assume they might be someone that works in the same field as Suho.

They might also be someone who is like an authority figure for Suho.

I have the feeling that this guide-figure might introduce him to a new love interest or to new people in general, either because this soulmate has a lot of acquaintances or because the skill Suho acquired will make him able to approach new people.

The oracle card Gift might refer to the fact that this person will do a lot for Suho, not only he’ll grow professionally, but Suho might also meet new important people.

It’s possible Suho was lacking something in the past? Something that gets filled thanks to his soulmate’s gift.

This soulmate is like a door to a new world of opportunities. From this person a lot of good things will arrive, probably Suho will feel like the stars aligned in his favor, he might probably feel that it’s a miracle he met them and that a lot has changed for him since then.

Baekhyun

Cards: rev knight of swords, 9 of swords, 4 of wands, nourishment, grief, fight

4 of wands is back again.

I think it has the potential to be a positive and stable relationship, but there are some big issues they need to deal with.

I think they meet at the wrong time and meet several obstacles.

It's possible one of them isn’t exactly at their best when it comes to mental health, they probably have deep insecurities and anxieties.

Nourishment in my deck is represented as a mother cat who feeds her puppies. The milk of a mother is the only food a kitty can eat, it’s what makes them grow strong and healthy. A mother’s milk is the most nutritious food.

So it makes me think that in this union there’s a lot of support, they take care of each other, they heal each other.

But every puppy will have to leave their mother sooner of later. Here comes the Grief.

I think Baekhyun will have to be separated from this soulmate, but for what reason? One of them hurt the other? Was it a problem within the couple? Or was he pressured to do it by an external force?

There’s a lot of pain and regret in this phase because it feels as if Baekhyun lost his main source of sustain.

After Grief, in this reading, comes Fight. This means that he (or both) will choose to stop being passive and anguish in this pain and take an active stance. 

It could be that he finally chooses to let go of his feelings and look ahead, maybe focusing on his job, friends or trying to meet new people, especially if the cause of their break up was caused by one of the two.

Or, if the break up was caused by a third party, it could mean that he’ll start to think that it’s time to prioritize himself, his mental health and his feelings, so he’ll try to get closer once again to this soulmate.

Chanyeol

Cards: rev 10 of cups, rev ace of swords, rev the moon, choice, message, creativity

I get similar vibes compared to Lay’s reading but in this case, the person is someone that gives good advice to Chanyeol and someone he should listen to.

This person is not a lover or they're an ex, I don't see a future for them as lovers, even though they have an intimate relationship.

They’re a very positive presence, a mind-opener, someone who can give him good ideas and help if he ever feels confused. Literally like the light of the moon during a dark night.

The Choice is represented in my deck by a cat that is in front of two streets, one street leads to a building, the other one doesn’t have a clear destination.

If this person is really an ex (which now I think is the best interpretation), it means that at some point Chanyeol had to make a choice, probably this other person wanted to settle down and get married or live together while Chanyeol wasn’t ready. Or maybe this person forced him to choose between their relationship and his job. Probably his job was taking all his time and they felt left out.

Either way, their relationship ends, but on positive terms.

I think this relationship was a good experience for both and taught them a lesson, for example it’s possible Chanyeol learnt that stable relationships aren’t his things, so he shouldn’t really invest too much into them or make it clear from the start that he doesn’t have any intention to settle down.

Ultimately, creativity may reinforce this idea that Chanyeol truly chose his job (which is a very creative one, he is into writing, music production etc.) as his main mission in life, it might also imply that their relationship was a good source of inspiration for him or that this person will give him good advice when it comes to his creative process.

[blujayonthewing]

Heartbreak, midnight, mistake for Mel if they haven’t been asked and actually can you dow them for Felix too, cause why not.

heartbreak: Have they ever had a relationship that ended badly? Experienced some other kind of heartbreak? What happened?

biting my fist I wish I had better answers for this because I love this question. The problem with both felix and mel is that they are in their 50s and 60s respectively, which isn't very many for a gnome but is still just A Lot Of Years for me, an idiot, to fill with life experiences and I've mostly been really bad about doing that kfgjhdgj.

Melliwyk has always been really bad at relationships in general; she's dated a little, mostly very casually, but especially once she was in the academy she fell pretty hard into 'yes yes yes I'll go socialize when I'm done working on this' chaining one project into the next ad infinitum, especially after the experiment backfire explosion that gave her a reputation as this sort of ruthless researcher and resulted in kind of a feedback loop of people assuming she preferred to be left alone, which meant fewer people bugging her into socializing once in awhile, which reinforced her perception as a loner, etc. I think she's been in at least a handful of relationships with people she really liked that could have been serious but just... sort of fell apart; more regrets than outright heartbreaks.

Honestly as of current canon, I think the worst outright heartbreak Mel's had that I know of was being attacked by, and then losing, her house's ghost as soon as she found out he was real the whole time; aside from Baxter, he was her only friend for years and years, even if only an 'imaginary' one, and it was a gut punch to, essentially, finally find him but then immediately lose him forever.

Felix has even less canon backstory I could tell you about right now, alas :') He's been in very few meaningful relationships; he's not good at putting himself out there, and having a brief encounter with a stranger is a lot easier to navigate than... well, someone else being disappointed with the way he is as a whole person. To be fair, I don't think he's been openly rejected a lot, but the way he sort of expects it shapes his behavior such that it makes it harder for others to get that close to him in the first place. I can very much see him having had his heart broken before, but I'd have to get back to you on specifics ^^; These days he mostly keeps to himself; he likes people, but it's easier for him to be around them than to be one of them.

I am incapable of brevity! The rest under the cut!

midnight: What keeps your OC up at night? Do they have nightmares? Fears? Anxieties? What do they do in the small hours of the morning when they should be sleeping?

Melliwyk is up working. She'd be up working anyway, but especially if she's upset-- working tirelessly, if not relentlessly. She's not good with emotions; she processes things by keeping busy, either looking for Solutions or just looking to throw herself into something productive rather than having to feel her feelings. This is overlapping really neatly with her current major source of stress, which is that everything she's working on is deeply important, and anything she neglects in order to work on those things is also deeply important, and other people are getting hurt and will continue to get hurt if she can't prioritize tasks correctly or do enough quickly enough and well enough. She doesn't have time for fears! Or anxieties! Or sleep! Or dinner! And it's great! After all, she loves her work! She's interested! Passionate! No downsides!! She doesn't have nightmares because the reason she wears that goofy hat at all times is literally to magically prevent nightmares, but I bet if she slept without it her nightmares would be real interesting right now :)

The facetious answer for Felix is: his sleep schedule is sort of unusual, so when he's up in the small hours it's normal and he's getting up to whatever his normal gnome business is, lol. But in the proper spirit of the question:

He lost a lot of sleep after the mysterious encounter that took a chunk of his memory and left a strange mark on his skin. In general, Felix is not immune to getting too invested in [area of interest] and staying up way too late, so he's certainly lost sleep working on/ thinking over really interesting mysteries before, but that situation has so many unknowns, has so many worrying or grim implications, has given him so much to think about and yet so little to actually work with...! The fact that he can't remember getting back to town is what upsets him the most. He's found himself (or put himself) in a lot of really dangerous situations, but he's always had control of his own mind and body before, even when he's been physically overpowered by others.

More generally, sometimes he'll learn something or uncover some secret that he ends up losing sleep over, especially if it's information about something bad that he doesn't feel like he can actually act on. The city he spends most of his time in is less-than-secretly controlled by a powerful criminal guild, so he has to maintain a really delicate balance between snooping around a lot just because that's what interests him anyway, helping others as much as he can, but also staying out of the way of the guild and the law enough that the worst either of them do is, you know, beat him up a little and/or throw him in jail for a couple days, rather than deciding it'd be better if he Just Disappeared.

If he's worried or anxious and can't sleep over it, he'll generally go for a walk, or go sit on a roof for awhile, or sit somewhere and draw if the weather's bad. He doesn't have a lot of nightmares, but when he does they're often about being trapped somewhere and being unable to call for help, or seeing people pass by who can't seem to see or hear him (all of which he stubbornly refuses to read into).

mistake: What’s the worst mistake your OC ever made? What led to them making it? Have they been able to fix it? How have they moved on?

A little while back, Melliwyk's party returned from a ground excursion to find our airship under attack by a powerful archmage, her personal bodyguard, a bunch of summoned fiends, and a crew of elite soldiers; as soon as she managed to get back on deck Melliwyk launched a fireball at the archmage and then moved toward the cabin looking to get cover inside, and the archmage returned with a massive flamestrike right on top of Mel, who... had just run directly to where most of the crew of the ship were, all of whom had already taken damage before we got there. Our first mate went down, and we managed to get him just inside the door to the stairs leading belowdecks, but before any healers could reach him a previously invisible imp stung him, killing him instantly, right at Melliwyk's feet.

And the thing is. Maybe it wouldn't have mattered whether she, personally, drew fire to him; he had already been pretty hurt, and it was a rough battle for everyone, and there's no reason to believe the archmage still wouldn't have dropped a big AOE on half the ship. And maybe it's perfectly reasonable that Melliwyk, a wizard, a transmutation wizard, didn't try to use her entire action in the middle of a pitched battle to try to stabilize him when there were no obvious enemies nearby, and an actual healer was literally feet away, running to help him. Maybe. But she can only think that it was so, so stupid of her, that if she'd just thought for one second, for once-- ... anyway. The next week or so were all 'Mel doesn't leave her room or speak to anyone' days. Working. Relentlessly. She'd already been working on figuring out a method to use her newly-learned insights into artificing to cast spells, but the first spells she actually programmed into the device she was working on were spare the dying, cure wounds, and revivify.

Felix bit off more than he could chew; he was following the trail of some weird rumors in a smaller town, hoping to find a connection to a string of recent petty thefts he'd been looking into, but he underestimated what kind of people he was dealing with-- both in terms of skills, and of how serious their operation actually was. He got caught pretty deep into their base of operations, way too deep for any attempt at plausible deniability, and after beating the shit out of him they opted to just tie him up and leave him in an abandoned and mostly blocked-off sewer passage to die, rather than kill him outright. He only escaped by convincing the rats to chew through the ropes, quickly made his way out of the city by staying belowground for as long as possible, and has never been back since-- there's a chance they forgot about him immediately, but there's also a very good chance that they'd be really upset if that guy who Knows Too Much is still just running around like a dangerous loose thread.

It was just-- well, maybe not cockiness, he's not exactly the cocky type, but certainly carelessness. He got sloppy, over-interested and under-cautious; he hadn't really expected to be dealing with people who'd be able to catch him so easily, much less that he'd be in any serious danger if they did. He was expecting, like, a gang of teenagers at worst-- not not a threat, but people he could maybe stand up to in a fight, or wriggle free from pretty easily, or who at the very least wouldn't try to fucking kill him. This would have been fairly early in his career (so to speak) of trying to tail people and break into places for actual, like, private investigation reasons rather than pure curiosity, so he didn't have a good handle on the risks, or the stakes; he's (usually) a lot more careful nowadays, although sometimes he still can't resist pushing his luck.

ask about my OCs?

[deijiyong]

Navigation: Next Part | Story Masterlist | Masterlist

2015 December 21st - Day One 1/2

It’s 4 AM when your phone goes off

You shoot up to shut off the alarm, eyes falling to Changkyun who barely moves on his spot on the floor

You rush to the showers to get clean; hoping to get rid of the smell of beer

Just as quickly you get dressed, grab your things and go to class

You don’t have much time to think of Changkyun when your first class professor has no care for someone who booked their class and refuses to show up on time

Anything you missed, you would have to figure out on your own

Thankfully, you’re in your seat before the professor even gets in the room

You shoot Changkyun a message

I’m in class, I have a 2 hour break after 10 AM - see you then?

Your mind races as your professor walks in, so you send one more text

Please stay out of trouble

It’s a few minutes after 10 when you make it back to your dorm

The look Mrs. Kim gave you on the way in lets you know she’s not impressed

You make a note to give her a token of thanks before the week is up

Changkyun is lounging on your bed when you make it into your room

He’s dressed in layers today

Babe, you’re back

We have to go

I planned my break at this time since no one is usually in the dorm right now

I think Mrs. Kim will kick me from the dorm if I don’t get you out soon

He laughs, but he moves to gather his things, pulling on his shoes and jacket before wrapping his coat around his body and zipping it up

Changkyun thanks Mrs. Kim once more as you leave the dorm

You sigh in relief once you’re outside, happy that you hadn’t gotten caught

Kyun wraps his arm over your shoulders as you both make your way off campus

How were your morning classes?

This isn’t your lunchtime, right?

I’ll pay for something 

I’m hungry too

Hotel first

You’re almost off-campus when you see Taeyong

He’s sitting with some friends outside of the cafeteria; sandwich in his hands

His mouth drops open when he sees you and belatedly Changkyun

You just turn away, not wanting to figure out what he’s thinking

Changkyun pulls you closer, your face almost in his chest 

I think he just pissed himself, babe

(you push him off you) No, he didn’t

Did you see his face?

I think he thought he dreamed of seeing me last night

You debate looking back at Taeyong, but ultimately decided against it

Changkyun convinces you to get lunch first

You find a hot pot place; getting lost in catching up with your best friend

So how has school been going?

(looks up at you while moving the vegetables around over his rice) uhm, (looks back down) not so well

Jooheon and I haven’t really been as close as we used to

He’s prioritizing Jiyeon and school over me

I’m having a hard time focusing on my work

I know this is my fault

Why were you having trouble focusing?

(looks up at you again) I missed you

There was so much I had wanted to say at my graduation party 

But then you didn’t show up and I’ve felt regret over not coming to find you that night to tell you anyways

(placing your head on your hand) tell me what?

Huh?

(shoves food in his mouth) nothing

Kyun,,,

No, really, it’s nothing

If you say so

Changkyun dodges every attempt you have at bringing up the conversation during lunch while looking for a hotel that is close to your university

A hotel finally presents itself a short subway ride from the university

It’s run down, dirty, and potentially infested - but, it’s cheap

You stand hesitantly in the doorway watching as Changkyun places his stuff in the room

Are you sure you want to stay here?

Even a pc room is better than this place

It’s fine, I’m sure it will be fine

(you frown) you cannot be serious

(he grins, hands on his waist as he watches you) 

Are you going to protect me?

(you glance at your watch) I have to get back for my next class

Stay out of trouble

YN don’t leave me!

I don’t have time for this, you’re too far from campus

(pouts) Don’t go

I have class

(turns to leave) come find me at 7 PM

[linkedkeysau-official]

Linked Keys Febuwhump

day 11 - fever

Wind thought it couldn’t get any worse. It wasn’t enough for him to be sick and for everyone to be babying him (he hated being treated like a little kid, even when he wasn’t at his best). Turns out things could in fact get worse. This came in the form of the Chain’s third attempt to climb Nihya Peak, during which Wind stubbornly insisted on coming along… then promptly being separated when they reached the Blizzard Zone. Wind was now all alone, already feeling like shit but with bitter cold to accompany it. He didn’t like the cold, in fact the tropical island boy couldn’t stand it. It was even worse when your nose was already nonstop running and you could only breathe through your mouth, and you were achy and fatigued. This was hell.

Still, he knew he couldn’t just sit around feeling miserable. He remembered what Wild had said about staying warm if you kept moving. He had to try to find the others anyway. In an attempt to shield himself from the snow as best he could, he held up his shield, then used the Wind Waker to change the direction of the winds so it blew against the shield, which blocked most of it from him. With this improvised protection, he began moving through the deep snow, trying his best to ignore the freezing cold snow that his feet— covered by nothing but sandals— were completely submerged in.

“Guys?! Anyone?!” He called out. His voice was drowned out by the roaring wind. He doubted anyone would hear him even if they were within arm’s reach. That meant he either had to wander around until he found someone, or he had to prioritize finding shelter. Wind was really liking the second option. Chances were, in this storm, most of the others would be doing that as well anyway. Even just a cave or something would be a blessing right now… Gods, it was cold…

The frozen air made it hard to breathe, and the altitude wasn’t helping at all. Wind probably sounded like a fish out of water, gasping for air as he continued the trek across the mountainside in search of some kind of refuge. He was shivering violently, though he didn’t feel cold; on the contrary, he felt way too hot. His mind was in a fog, so he couldn’t quite remember, but… he heard somewhere about that being a bad thing. Why, though, he couldn’t piece together. All he knew was he felt awful, and tired, and so, so sick, and he wanted so badly to just sleep. He even thought about curling up in the snow for a quick nap, he felt so shitty, but at the last second decided that might not be the best idea.

His hands and arms were bright red. His feet and ankles were turning purple. His head felt like it was on fire and like it wanted to explode. He couldn’t go on. Everything hurt too much. He was going to die out here alone, wasn’t he? At least that was what he feared before a howl cut through the air. Wind nearly panicked, knowing that the howl belonged to a wolf. But when a wet nose brushed up against his cheek followed by a faceful of black fur, he realized there might be hope after all… Twilight had come. 

The wolf let out a pitiful whine, nudging Wind as if to urge him to get up. Wind tried, but felt far too weak. Wolfie nudged his arm, gesturing for Wind to hold onto him. Wind threw his arm around the canine, grabbing a fistful of fur and letting the wolf pull him to a sitting position. The wolf remained still, letting the teen lean against him to try and stand up. 

“Thanks Wolfie…” Wind muttered, half conscious. He tried to stand, but his legs felt like chuchu jelly, promptly giving out and leaving him slumped over on Twilight’s back. Twilight, a look of great concern in his eyes, quickly pulled on the sleeve of Wind’s shirt as if to tell the kid to climb onto his back. He was small enough, and he certainly wasn’t in any shape to move on his own. Once Wind was securely on his back, Twilight stalked off carefully towards a cave that he’d found.

Wind was burning up with a fever, but shivering from the cold at the same time. His hands and feet definitely appeared to have frostnip. The wolf silently cursed himself for not speaking up before the Chain started climbing the mountain. Wind didn’t handle the cold well. Everyone knew he didn’t, and given that he’d already been sick it was a surprise anyone let him tag along to begin with. Twilight wasn’t sure whether the bigger danger was the fever or the risk of hypothermia, but he did know the snow wasn’t doing the kid any favors either way. He couldn’t do much to care for the poor kid as a wolf, without opposable thumbs and the ability to speak. But he wasn’t exactly dressed for this weather either, and he would be no use to Wind if he were freezing as well.

The only option Twilight had for now was to remain in wolf form and curl up around the Sailor to keep him warm… And hope he didn’t get any worse… And hope that someone else would find them soon. 

Hours passed, and Wind had not shown any signs of improvement aside from simply not getting any worse. Wolfie remained curled up around him, keeping watch for any of their friends, but while he caught their scent briefly a few times, none came close enough to the cave to notice the two… Until Wolfie caught the scent of probably the best person for the situation: Wild. He was with Future, and they were approaching the cave. Twilight barked in hopes of getting their attention.

“Wolfie!” Future exclaimed, sprinting into the shelter of the cave with a sigh of relief.

“Twi…! Oh thank Hylia you’re—” Wild started to say before noticing the mess of blond curls hidden behind the wolf’s fuzzy body, “WIND!” 

“Dammit, I knew we shouldn’t have let him come along… He’s burning up!” Wild almost flinched as he put a hand against the sailor’s forehead. He looked around frantically, but didn’t see anyone else approaching. He’d have to take care of the kid himself, which he could do, but he still would have preferred if Hyrule or Legend or someone with more experience were to handle.

“Kit, take this and soak it in the snow. We need to cool him down.” Wild handed Future a small handkerchief, then took out his slate and with a flash of blue light, a bundle of chopped wood and a piece of flint appeared on the cave floor, “I’m gonna start a fire to keep us warm in here. Twi, bark if something happens with Wind.”

Wild struck the flint with his sword, igniting the wood. Future returned soon after with the handkerchief, now very wet and cold, and started dabbing at Wind’s forehead. Twilight remained curled up where he was, doing his best to shield the sick sailor from the cold and the wind. The kid should be out of immediate danger now that he had Wild and Future taking care of him as well, but that wouldn’t last if they couldn’t find the rest of their group and get off this damn mountain…

Hopefully the others would find them soon…

[tanenigiri]

Review #23: I Think Our Son Is Gay (Volume 3)

Japanese title: うちの息子はたぶんゲイ (Uchi no Musuko wa Tabun Gay)

Story and art: Okura

English publisher: Square Enix

Number of volumes: 3 in English, 4 in Japanese (ongoing)

Expanding horizons.

(CW: Mentions of homophobic language)

(This review contains story spoilers.)

Out of the first three volumes of I Think Our Son Is Gay, I think Volume 3 is the one that can stand the most on its own. While it’s obviously best to have read this after the first two volumes, I say this because not only does the story take its time to reintroduce us to certain characters and plotlines, it also has one major storyline that starts and ends in this volume - a school choir competition.

Volume 2 ended with Hiroki revealing that since he and Daigo ended up not being in the same class for their second year in high school, they decided to join an after-school club together. This turns out to be the school choir, and Asumi, Hiroki’s neighbor, has also joined the same club (which is why we see the three of them together in the cover). There are a few chapters here that show Hiroki practicing hard for this competition and putting in the effort to get better at singing, and it’s nice to see that it doesn’t look like this is entirely motivated by his affection for Daigo. While that’s obviously a big factor, I always got the sense that Hiroki genuinely wanted to improve and do well in the competition when I was reading those chapters.

This arc does lead to an interesting facet of Hiroki’s character - his low self-esteem. While this is a pretty common character trait across many of the protagonists in the series I’m covering for this project - and I enjoy reading about all of them - this story tackles it quite uniquely in that we only get to see it from the point of view of Tomoko, who of course thinks the world of her son. This first shows itself in his singing, where despite Asumi and their other clubmates saying that he was doing a good job, the only feedback he listens to is Daigo’s, who tells him that he was off-key during their practice. While this could easily be attributed to Hiroki prioritizing Daigo’s opinions, I do think it’s supposed to be a nod at how Hiroki doesn’t think too highly of himself. (This is also how Yuri assesses the situation as well, once again proving that he’s the best character.)

However, this eventually manifests itself again when Akiyoshi, back home from his work, tells his son that Asumi used to have a massive crush on him when they were kids. Hiroki immediately shuts this down and says that it’s nothing like that now, adding that there are other guys in the choir who are much cooler than him. But it’s the line he says after this - “There’s no way she likes me. It’s just not possible!” - that elicits a reaction from Tomoko, saying that anything is possible when it comes to liking someone. I really like how she words this, as she was definitely making the connection that Hiroki had the same views about his crush on Daigo. Her reflection on this that ends this chapter is really sweet, too, as she surmises that as long as Hiroki actually believes that being together with someone is possible, then he can work toward it. And I definitely appreciate how the story doesn’t just limit this to Hiroki’s pining for Daigo as it also references Asumi’s pining for Hiroki.

The story revisits Hiroki’s low self-esteem one more time in a later chapter that sees Daigo having dinner with the Aoyama family. As it turns out, Daigo has picked up on Hiroki’s self-deprecation, and he’s made it a point to always remind Hiroki how much of a good guy he is. I initially found this scene primarily hilarious, thanks to the ridiculous reactions from Tomoko and Yuri after this, but after rereading, I actually found it more meaningful than anything. Since it’s shown earlier on that Hiroki values Daigo’s opinion more than anyone else’s, this could be just what he needs to have more confidence in himself. And while he has a hard time swallowing it, I definitely think this is a start of a change for his character, though unfortunately the volume is already wrapping up when this happens.

Turns out, Hiroki isn’t the only man in Tomoko’s life who’s pining for another man. We get confirmation from this volume that Mr. Tono, one of her workmates, is in fact in a relationship with another man, as it was only a rumor when it was brought up by one of the other employees in Volume 2. Mr. Tono mentions that he doesn’t really hide this fact about him, but he only brings it up when needed, and since nobody had asked him until that point, he kept details about his partner to himself. Tomoko is obviously floored by this revelation, but not for the same reasons that her workmates are - suddenly, she has someone reliable who can help her with how she deals with her son.

This leads to my favorite scene in the entire series so far, where Tomoko asks Mr. Tono for advice on how to best support her son. All Mr. Tono asks her is a simple question - would she want to change Hiroki if he turns out to be gay? It’s implied that Tomoko gives this question a bit of thought, but she surmises that she would want nothing more than for her son to be comfortable with himself. Mr. Tono then tells Tomoko that for him, this is already more than enough, and that she’s doing “just fine.”

I absolutely love this exchange as this is the first time that Tomoko gets the credit she deserves for being such an open-minded and understanding mother. It’s easy to forget that Tomoko is an anomaly - realistically, most parents act more like Akiyoshi when it comes to LGBT people, and even this series, wholesome as it is, doesn’t shy away from featuring more close-minded characters. I’m not surprised at all that she’s moved to tears by Mr. Tono’s words, and I really hope we get to see more of him soon - I think Hiroki meeting Mr. Tono would be a huge turning point for the former.

Her newfound confidence in herself is immediately put to the test in the following chapters, which sees Akiyoshi reacting quite awkwardly when Tomoko tells him about Mr. Tono, going as far as calling him a “fairy.” He brings up the term again in a conversation with Hiroki, where he wonders why he isn’t pursuing a girl and observes how he’s gotten quite close with Daigo. Unexpectedly, Hiroki doesn’t just stay silent about this and calls his father out on how ridiculous his expectations are, saying that it was quite unfair how he’s immediately labeled as a “fairy” just because he prefers focusing on his friendship with a guy instead of a relationship with a girl.

While this anger is surprising for the parents, this doesn’t come out of nowhere for the reader, as the chapter right before this is a Yuri-focused flashback, which shows Yuri’s classmates calling him a homophobic slur for hanging out with girls a lot. Yuri’s shown to not really be affected by this, but his brother ends up stepping in and defending him from these bullies. While Yuri admits that the bullying didn’t stop even after this confrontation, he does recognize that what Hiroki did must’ve taken a lot out of him, especially with the subject matter hitting quite close to home.

So Hiroki ends up treating the situation with his father in the same way that he treated the situation with Yuri’s bullies as they broach on the same topic, and he’s justifiably pissed off about it. Like I said above, both parents are surprised at this sudden outburst, but Akiyoshi rightfully muses that what he was saying about “fairies” must have been a sensitive topic for his son, and he ends up entertaining the idea that the label might also apply to him.

Tomoko, who definitely knows that her husband is nowhere near ready to handle that conversation, steers the topic away from it and instead focuses on how his words hurt his son’s feelings, even if Akiyoshi only treated them as jokes. She ends up making the connection with Yuri’s past bullies, which Akiyoshi finds eye-opening. I definitely think she made the right call here, as not only has she not even heard confirmation from Hiroki himself about his sexuality, but she still thinks that she’s on training wheels with regards to the situation, despite all the progress that she’s already made.

It’s an interesting note to end this volume of I Think Our Son Is Gay on - though there are two more chapters right after this scene that wrap up the school choir competition plot - as while it definitely shows that the entire Aoyama family has made a lot of progress in terms of how they each handle Hiroki’s issues about his identity, it also reminds us that all four of them have a long way to go before being able to comfortably talk about it. While Tomoko and Yuri may be a few levels ahead in terms of understanding, they know that they have to be patient in waiting for Hiroki and Akiyoshi to catch up.

Random thoughts I couldn’t fit elsewhere:

It pains me that I didn’t talk about Yuri much above, but the best character of the series actually has a lot more to do in this volume compared to the last. He gets a killer line in an early chapter where Tomoko urges him to get a haircut, and Hiroki suggests to have it cut short as he thinks having a short haircut is cool. Yuri then comes to the conclusion that his brother likes guys with short hair - and it takes a full beat before he corrects himself by saying that what he meant was he liked short hairstyles.

Another character who has a lot more to do in this volume compared to the previous one is Asumi, as like I mentioned above, she’s also part of the school choir. While she’s presented to be a very good friend to Hiroki - and it’s once again implied that she hasn’t really gotten over her childhood crush on him - what stands out to me here is how in quite a number of her appearances, it’s hinted that she’s caught on to how Hiroki feels about Daigo. This isn’t really confirmed, and we don’t really see any change in her behavior because of this revelation (if it’s even happened), but I’m very interested in how the story will end up dealing with this. I have a feeling that she does realize what’s going on but is still coming to terms with it in her own way.

Asumi also ends the Hiroki self-esteem plotline in a very positive note, as when asked by Tomoko, Asumi reveals that Hiroki is very well-liked by the people around him. And I don’t think this has anything to do with her crush on him, too, as her observations about Hiroki are quite close to what Daigo said about him in an earlier chapter. It’s nice to see that even if Hiroki doesn’t think highly of himself, the people around him in school do see him as a good friend.

Thanks for reading! You can read my review of the first two volumes of I Think Our Son Is Gay here. I’m really enjoying the series so far, as it has a lot of depth for something that I initially thought was just a light-hearted and goofy title. I’m definitely rooting for Hiroki to become more open about his identity, but I’m also content in celebrating the little victories that each of the Aoyama family members experiences throughout these volumes.

[bruhstation]

Hi! I love your AU and human designs so much, can I ask what the inspirations for it are?

thank you very much!!! well besides the obvious being the ttte show and the railway series books, a lot of inspirations for the story came from comics, shows, and games that I love. also whatever my brain cooks whenever I'm daydreaming about anything exciting to happen in classes

(long ramble + some character talk under the cut)

to start off this insane ramble. inspirations for writing the characters came from - to name a few - land of the lustr0us, d3ltarun3, the p0kem0n myst3ry dunge0n games, blue peri0d... the story as well. also some of the wackiness came from joj0's biz4rre adventure

land of the lustr0us is a HUGE one. this manga is about humanoid beings living in a society that prioritizes hard work over creativity, believes that the group's benefits is more important over one's own interests, casts aside those who can't work well, and doesn't really understand the concept of death and loss because they all believe they can be fixed (until they realize their fallen comrades are ground to dust and spread across the moon).

(ph0s' character development metamorphosis is a great inspiration for thomas', henry's and lady's characters. c1nnabar's and di4mond's are james' and percy's)

it's just like ttte. and casa tidmouth, except they're all actually humans and it's way WAY less darker than land of the lustr0us

I also like playing with parallels - duck and diesel being one of my favorites - and juxtapositions.... like gordon for example. his whole family is dying one by one yet despite his (understandable) sadness to the point where prior to the story he once asked scott to visit him, he now couldn't bother enough to think too much about it, unlike his remaining brother scott. gordon's not exactly famous job-wise outside of sodor but the steam team got his back, unlike scott who's insanely famous - a celebrity - yet his celebrity friends are just friends with him for the sake of their own reputations. I think it fits with the whole "everyone's all friends and coworkers on the surface yet there's a secret or two that we've decided to keep to ourselves" or "lamenting what I don't have instead of being happy for what I have" themes. something like that, capiche?

also in general I'm just fascinated about the concept of purpose and how someone's life (whether it's their lifespan, upbringing, or their role in day-to-day life in general) affects it. like lady and d10.

lady's a goddess from the shining time world. her purpose is, well, to make sure nobody dies from any freak accidents. after that's out of the window thanks to gold dust shortages, her new purpose is now to look for gold dust sources. despite all this, she never understood how humans truly work, how their relationships affect each other, how everyone has different purposes and is even able to choose their own, because from the start of her life in the shining time world until she visited sodor, she's always been alone (yet content, for she doesn't know that the company of others might have changed her life a whole lot) and appointed as the goddess of the railways. nothing more, nothing less.

d10's almost the same as lady. I won't tell too much about his backstory, but it's not hard to guess that a man with 10 phds, numerous accounts of crimes, and who works as a very questionable scrapyard worker doesn't exactly have the nicest backstory. he started out alone, something that lady also shares, and they're both insanely curious about what they aren't (d10's are gods and their powers, while lady's is humans), but what makes them both different is that one finds his own purpose by himself and works his ass off to reach his goal (even though it's definitely messed up), while the other already got a purpose assigned to her the moment she existed. and boy will these not turn out exactly the prettiest for the both of them, especially when they eventually meet

as for character designs: I just eyeball them and then add details that correspond to their respective stories and occupations. henry cut his hair and got two noticeable scars after his revivement to show his growth, gordon’s outfit is a 4-layer suit because he has to dress sharp as the face of the express, thomas’ outfit consists of overalls, a pair of modified sneakers, and red bandana to show that he’s the protagonist who started off as someone excited for adventures, etc.

ANYWAYS PFDTFDYFGH SORRY FOR THE LONG RAMBLE I JUST LOVE TALKING ABOUT WRITING AND CHARACTERS .... THANK YOU FOR ASKING!!!