#he’s so dumb ugh i stan

[cinnbar-bun]

Watching Reality TV With You (Various One Piece Characters x Reader)

Characters: Zoro, Sanji, Trafalgar Law, Luffy, Perona + Mihawk, Nami, Kizaru/Borsalino, Eustass Kidd

A/n: Sorry I’m a huge fan of Real Housewives so take these silly headcanons!!!

Note: GN reader, the relationships with the character(s) and reader can be seen as platonic/romantic depending on what you prefer :) Mihawk + Perona’s relationship to each other is also not stated just for your personal preference. These are all just very silly things, don’t take this too seriously since it’s crack!

Zoro

“The hell? Why are you watching this crap? It’s not even real!”

He just sighs and grumbles about how this is dumb the whoooooole time.

Tends to sharpen his swords or try and nap while it’s on.

Until lowkey he starts peeking a bit like ‘did she just say that?’

Suddenly has opinions on it and tries to deny he’s interested but his eyes are GLUED once they start arguing and the suspenseful music is playing.

“Well, if I was her, I think I’d just kick them. Or maybe cut their car in half.”

Sanji

Opposite of Zoro. The man is probably a bigger fan than you and most likely is reading the gossip online.

It’s your weekly night hangout where he brings snacks and cozy blankets for you two to sit and enjoy while watching.

Gasps audibly and loudly.

He’s both the best and worst to talk about this with because he respects all women and he forgives them for everything, so they all get passes from him.

“Yes she may have talked badly about [name] and stole [name]’s house and maybe crashed a car. But we all do that. We need to show forgiveness. She’s having a tough time- her dress came in the wrong color.”

Law

Like Zoro, he’s very disturbed by the very prospect of reality tv.

But he’ll try. Let it be known he’s trying.

He doesn’t get interested in it but he does try to follow along so he can discuss it with you.

Not gonna lie though he’s the guy who’s focusing on their plastic surgery or illnesses.

Will literally pause the show just to examine what they may/may not have done and if the surgeon botched it up.

Imma just manifest this, he’s prolly a Terry Dubrow stan.

“Who’s your favorite Housewife so far?” “Terry.” “But… Terry isn’t-“ “It’s Terry.”

Unironically would drop a horrible quote from whichever show you’ve been watching and he’d say it so seriously that everyone’s jaw will drop and it takes him a sec for him to realize what he said.

Luffy

Imma keep this short for you- he ain’t looking.

He ain’t caring.

No thoughts.

He only cares when there’s a party and food is being served.

“Woooooah! Look at all that food!!!”

Doesn’t even recognize who is who and will just mindlessly wait for food to come on screen.

Perona + Mihawk

I’m putting this as a two for one they’re my everything <3

You and Perona are the ones who watch it lots. Perona does complain about how much they argue but she loooooves looking at the houses and clothes of the women. Makes comments about wanting to fly first class or visit the beautiful places they go to.

Mihawk is reading.

Perona is biased as hell and only defends the people that are wearing cute clothes. Otherwise? Shit list.

“Ugh! What is that dress?! It’s so hideous!” “Is that all you’re focusing on?” “I agree with (Y/n), Perona, she just had gotten into some relationship troubles with [name], so I think [name] is wrong.”

You and Perona are gasping and shocked that Mihawk 1) talked and 2) had an opinion on this???

Turns out the man had been listening the whole time (he’s quite the multitasker).

If Perona is the most biased viewer, Mihawk tries to remain objective and impartial. He's always listing out the nuances of a conversation.

“I think [name] is just jealous.” “Well, if we remember in season 4, episode 14-“

He’s a smart ass sometimes, but it’s okay, he’s our smart ass.

Perona is always enthusiastic about marathoning the shows again and watching it. She tends to do dress up requirements for watching it.

Nami

I’d hesitate to call Nami a “fan” of reality shows.

She’s aware of them, yes. Does she particularly care for it? Nah, not really.

They’re more background noise and eye candy for her.

She just likes putting them on and glancing every once in a while to gaze at the beautiful houses and trips.

“Oh that’s so expensive… imagine what you could do with all that!”

Sometimes has a fun game for herself to estimate the cost of an outfit, accessory, or house. It’s scary how accurate and detailed she can get with it.

Tends to mostly focus on fashion and get new ideas to steal- I mean, incorporate.

Doesn’t have strong opinions on the cast, but she isn’t too crazy about the louder members.

Kizaru/Borsalino

He’s heard of it, he thinks.

And, well, since you’re so into them, he’ll give it a watch.

“Oh my, these ladies are incredibly wealthy and beautiful.”

He’s not even ogling them he’s just amazed at the way they dress, behave, and/or decorate their spaces. It’s almost like being starstruck???

The guy who will pause the tv at certain scenes to point at random decorations or outfits and be like “darling, would you like that?”

He does get sad when they start to fight.

“Aw… I was just liking the party… why are they arguing now?”

His favorite cast member is your favorite one <3 he’s just a cheerleader like that, dear.

He could listen to you talk about it for hours if you wanted, and he’d be amazed by your knowledge.

“You know, if you’d like for me to have you be on a show like this, I could probably pull some strings!”

Kidd

1000000x worse than Zoro

I cannot recommend putting it on in front of him.

“The hell is this shit?! Turn it off!”

You refuse and now he’s stuck watching grown women argue over dumb things (in his mind).

Complains the ENTIIIIRRRRE time. Nonstop commenting and complaining.

Okay but he’s hooked after a bit, the drama is just too good.

But now he’s WORSE cuz he’s got OPINIONS and THEYRE ALL SHITTY!

This man is an instigator. I swear to god he’s just saying shit just to rile you up and be contrarian.

He's stanning the biggest menaces on the show.

You two will probably get into (very silly) arguments about some of the situations and people.

And unlike say, Sanji, who tries to defend a person, Eustass will just say you’re wrong and then add something unhinged to it.

“Naw you just don’t get it. If I was her, personally, I think I’d just burn their mansion down and then slash their tires.”

[ohmtoff]

you made me think ab nerd nick too damn much its concerning. imagine jerking him off while he yaps ab his geeky stuff, stuttering and his words slurring when you squeeze around his tip

ANON…. youre actually my soulmate how did we think of the same thing (nsfw)

nerdy nick who’s far sighted so he regularly wears his glasses that make his eyes look bigger and just adorable. his wardrobe consists of graphic tees and hoodies that fit him awkwardly and his hair is most of the time disheveled.

nerdy nick whose budget goes to cosplay and comic con because those things are expensiveee and his brothers try their hardest to support him by helping him make the costumes (imagine nick unironically doing the anime hands thing around chris and matt and they try not to cringe LMFAOOOOO).

nerdy nick who yaps soooo much about his interests, from lord of the rings lore to his fav doctor from doctor who. i can just IMAGINE him making video essays complaining ab the new live action avatar series and how it doesnt hold up to the original series.

nerdy nick who’s the same sassy and witty guy as we know but he also puts that energy to defend his fav characters on the internet. best believe he has a stan account. many of his tattoos are dedicated to his comfort characters as well.

nerdy nick whose interests look innocent to others but behind closed doors he regularly reads and writes the most sheet gripping, back arching, toe curling smut about his fav fictional men. erwin from aot, thorin from the hobbit, ALL of jujutsu kaisen. he furiously stroked his dick to the thought of getting fucked dumb by nanami.

nerdy nick who acted normal and talks about regular stuff when he first met you but when he gets comfortable with you he immediately starts yapping. you think he’s just the most adorable thing when his eyes light up when talking about all his interests. you don’t even know what he’s talking about but your attention is hooked. nick, however, was used to people pretending to care about what he’s talking about so he stops himself.

“i’m sorry. ugh, i always talk too much, that was weird and boring”

“no, no, it’s fine. so… uruk-hais are bred between orcs and humans?”

nick wanted to suck your dick right then and there.

having sex with anime playing in the background was not rare between you two. one time, you both were watching an episode when you got distracted by how his tongue was peeking out with concentration. you noticed how fat his tongue was and how red his lips were. those same lips were wrapped around your cock not long after that. nick was gagging and moaning around it, his eyes bubbling up with tears streaming down his flushed cheeks as he jerked you off from the base. saliva would drip from his mouth, running down his chin as he struggled to take everything down. he was still wearing those same glasses, sliding down his nose from the sweat. he looks up at you with those big puppy eyes, tears running down his face. the sight makes you groan and shove your dick further into his throat. you thought he looked absolutely beautiful with cum streaks on his glasses.

nerdy nick who sometimes rambles too much and in these times you love teasing him. “come on, baby, tell me more,” you whispered to the back of his ear as he writhed and thrashed on your chest, pants gone and his swollen cock red and dripping as you squeezed the base. “time- time lords have two hearts, so,” he lets out a pathetic whine, “so the doctor never dies, he—mmnghh—they instead regenerate into a new body-AH-“ you squeeze and dug your thumb into his leaking tip. his chest heaves and he pants like a dog. “fu—uck, please, please, please. i wann- i wanna cum, oh please.” you think he deserves it so you quicken your strokes and let him cum. his mouth releasing unintelligible noises while those beautiful blue eyes go cross eyed.

nerdy nick who becomes your person and who you will go to endless comic cons with, watch a new series with, and who eventually will turn you into an even bigger nerd than he is😩🤞🏼

a/n: i wrote this without pause wtf

[catboygretzky]

Exyblr Dashboard Simulator based on what I personally see on sportsblr:

6/?

📜 realexyblog

jean moreau stans make me SCREAM like you know NOTHING about that boy. like good for y'all but. i'm pretty sure no one has ever even heard him talk.

👁 jean-mor-uhoh

we know that he is french, tall, and a defenseman. we don't need anything else

👨🏻‍❤️‍💋‍👨🏻 talk-exy-to-me

*u forgot the sad grey eyes, dark hair, and bad posture.

#bout to create a whole ass man w the knowledge he's a backliner and french, watch this space

547 notes

👸🏻 kevindazed follow

if no one calls kevin day princess to make him blush what's even the point of it all. huh. what's even the point.

#🙄 better be calling that girl princess every day of his life!!!! neil do it for the people!!!!

430 notes

🫡 exyisntreal follow

hey exyblr how we feeling about neil josten being the son of a gangster

🐋 sexyexy

wasn't on my neil bingo but maybe it should have been

💃fox-me-up follow

makes this kevneil mafia au i'm working on,,,,a little awkward askdhf

🙀 catboyneiljosten

ngl. kinda hot.

#kevneil mafia au tho 👀

589 notes

🥰 boytoyjeremyknox follow

had a dream i asked jeremy knox to sign my thigh so i could get it tattooed but dream jeremy spelled his name wrong. dream me still got it tattooed tho

jerm knox fans rise!!!!! dumb blonde rep we need

😎 foxyknoxy

JERM

🏳️‍🌈 gay4stickball follow

jerm and jean bout to take over the world babbyyy!!!!

#wonder how he feels knowing your dream version of him is a himbo #i mean same lmao but whatever

256 notes

👅 nastyneiljosten

oh, you chose your favourite team based on something that ISN'T 'breedability' ??????? unrealistic

🧸 mreow-bearcats-mreow

you are not seeing heaven (affectionate)

👅 nastyneiljosten

tbf sometimes i choose exy teams bc of how good the fic for the team is.

#you chose to be friends w me so u have to deal w this

189 notes

🙈 ittybittyminny follow

love the concept of andrew minyard. like. he's 5'0". he's almost killed multiple people. his bro HAS killed someone. could be the best in the world if he tried. he's a fox, so ya know. whatever comes with THAT. ugh he's a bug i want to study............always around but never at the forefront so you don't really KNOW. he's a martyr. he’s never done anything wrong……besides the whole juvie probably/almost killed someone……he is a girl……..he is the bestest boy………..he is a malewife………he’s a poor little meow meow……probably would rip me to shreds for even THINKING that. also he's a goalie.

#the being a goalie part adds an entire layer to him #zero goaliess are at all normal #andrew minyard #psu #goalie tag

679 notes

🌸 a-softer-exy

kevin day

#kevin day #psu foxes #palmetto foxes #exy #poetry #palmetto #edgar allen university #web weave

760 notes

[browniefox]

I asked for fic recs so it only makes sense that I provide some.

The Invisible Stan by The Last Speecher (HeidiMelone)

Simple, short, but elegant. You know how hanahaki disease is a trope? I feel like this should be a trope, but idk what you'd call it - Ninny disease sounds bad, but like it's clearly based off of Ninny from the Moomins. Anyway, great fic <3

An Outreached Hand by WDW

Ghost trick au! Love a good ghost trick au! I reread this recently and it still holds up so well, still so good even if unfinished. Haven't played ghost trick since, some of the twists make a hair more sense - especially the twist in the last chapter posted and being like 'OH IT'S *THE* GHOST TRICK'. Shoutout to undead creepiness and cute kitties :3

Retrograde by scrawling_stardumb

Kissing this one on the mouth. Only one chapter and unfinished, but it's a long chapter and really makes you go 'whoa'. It's interesting because the summary *technically* gives you more info than the chapter itself, but it's that kind of dramatic irony that fits the writing so well. A good solid McGucket POV too, which there really isn't enough of. Tbh, it stands okay almost as a one shot? I wish this became a whole popular au like all the others, bc it kicks ass as a concept.

Finding the Right Frequency by impish_nature

A pretty cute one! Ford trying to figure out how to deal with Bill, and Stan having found a stable job, and someow their two worlds intersect. Cute moments between the two, and some good Stans getting to reconnect.

Things You Can't Take Back by thesnadger

Classic by the Snadger! I always appreciate people who take Stan's memory less and make it more complicated, or at least have there be aftershocks to have your whole life erased :D So well written.

like they were a perfect fit by hapful

Stanford Pines and the photo he never looses. A beautiful story about Ford throughout the ages and his opnions on family, specifically Stan.

putting the dog to sleep by parsnipit

Old Yeller is such a sad story, and also some of this made me think of Mice and Men, and ugh just Stan and Ford and beign willing to kill something you love - sometimes because you love it - and it's such a perfect analogy to them I could die.

none of those phds is an md, you dumb idiot by untrustworthyglitch

I always love a fic that acknowledges language barriers. It reminds me of a really old fic where I did something similar, but like, being away from Earth would lead to you forgetting a lot of things, including language.

Too Late, Too Soon, Not Enough by IncomingAlbatross

Ah, gotta love a good fic that shows the missing scene of Ford and Stan switching places. Who came up with the idea? Who needed to be convinced? What swears do they get to use while off camera? Stan I love you so much, and Ford I lov eyou for beig nso complicated.

Raising Stakes by MaryPSue

Mwah! A Classic if I've ever seen one! While I'm partial to werewolf!Stan, Vampire!Stan does have so much potential and MaryPSue puts it to use so well! A great look into what Gravity Falls was like back in taht time period, and I love when people utilize Susan in fics that take place pre-portal <3 Also, Carla! I miss you so much Carla <3 It's drama, it's action, it's everything!

Lost and Found by PengyChan

Tate & Fiddleford have a lot of untapped potential, and while I think going the angst route makes a lot of sense, this one is almost more fluff and catharsis, I guess? I love it, near and dear to me.

Off-Season by anistarrose

Time Travel fic, but not a timestuck au? More likely than you think! A cute oneshot with particular focus on Stan, Mabel, and Dipper. Just a fluffy little thing with a couple strangers helping Stan out through a difficult winter.

Persist and Dwell by fencesit

A bit of Soos's trust in Grunkle Stan, and a mystery that isn't so much mystery as it is simply just not explicitly said. One of the final scenes has still stuck with me, and this is defo a concept I'd love to see explored more.

flee from your ghosts (burn your house down) by thepolysyndetonaddictsupportgroup

While typically OTGW x Gravity Falls crossovers are, like, Pinescone, I'm partial to this version where Wirt is their dad. There'a few details that didn' sit well with me, but over all so incredible and well written. Some of the metaphors are just so evocative I could eat them. The descriptions are to die for. And I love the depiction of a dad struggling to get his kids to open up to him that feels like it's part dads struggle with teens and part those pines twins just won't tell the truth.

If you have any Gravity Falls fic recs, feel free to comment them!

[southparkhcsocs]

Please help~

NSFW - all characters are aged up, mid twenties.

Context: you're sleeping round your boyfriends house and in the middle of the night he needs help~

Stan's gang!

This is really a dumb little thing I thought of this morning enjoy!

Kyle Broflovski

"Babe.. y/n, are you awake?"

Whining and whimpering

"Baaaabe?"

This boy is huffing and puffing

You shuffle in your sleep

"Are you awake 👀"

Silence

He can't hold it any more he wants you to wake up and satisfy his needs

He gently shakes you awake

"baby, please touch me.. 🥺"

"what?"

"I need you" he whimpers as he buries his face into your neck. Moving his leg over you thrusting his hips desperately into your side.

You of course happily oblige to his need for your touch.

Stan Marsh

This poor guy

Wakes up in the middle of the night hard as a rock.

He turns to you, checking if you're awake.

"babe?" He whispers quietly.

Silence.

He's not going to wake you.

He knows you have work in the morning.

So he just takes your sleeping hand and holds it and he traces his other hand down. Almost panting..

He starts of slowly, looking at you're sleeping face. God you looked to precious 💕

As he starts pumping faster he sqeezes your hand a little too hard.

He freezes as you turn around.

You're facing him directly now instead of being on your back and god he can't hold out much longer~

He quietly whimpers your name as he comes to his climax.

Kenny McCormick

Let's be real m'kay

This boy wastes NO time in waking you up

"please y/n, I need you~"

Wether it be gently kissing you neck caressing your body

Of violently shaking to so he could just feel your touch!!

Before you're even fully awake he's already on top of you ready

"no, ken, I'm too tired.."

Whimper

"can I just jerk over you 🥺"

"just.. not in my hair, okay?"

Massive and I mean MASSIVE smile on his face as he nods and gets down to business.

Eric Cartman

I'm not going to lie

Cartman is my fav

He wakes up in the dead of night hard

Ugh

You're fast asleep

So he's sure you won't mind if he uses your hand

The carefully takes a hold of your wrist and moves it towards his cock.

Gently, he wraps your fingers around himself and just starts going for it

He goes slow for like 2 seconds before using your hand to pump

Thing is, this guy cannot keep quiet

Whimpering, moaning, panting all of it

And of course, with the pressure of him squeezing your hand and the fast movements, you wake up

You quickly realised what's happening so to start assisting.

"what are you doing?"

"I think y-you know what I'm doing y/n.." his voice shaking

"god, Eric. I never realised you were such a pervert." You smirk

"i-im not!" He moves your hand faster using his other hand to grip onto your forearm.

"you totally are~"

"Y/n just s-shut up and help me~" he whimpers as you start to take full control

You can feel his cock twitching in your hand so you know he's going to cum soon.

You stop just before he reaches his climax

"w-wha- y/n what are - don't stop!!"

"say it."

"say what?"

"say you're a dirty little pervert."

He looks annoyed you can just barely see his face in the moon light as you smirk.

"you're not allowed to cum until you say it, Eric."

He huffs " i- I'm a dirty .. little p-pervert.."

"good boy" you continue rubbing him until he releases his load into your hand

But you don't stop. It's his turn to feel over stimulated~

[ellie233]

Kyle broflovski x fem reader

Sinopsis: kyle is too flirty without even noticing and girlie that makes you so mad 😾

*your p.o.v*

We are in a party, me and kyle arrived here like...40 mins ago and I'm kinda getting bored I've been talking to wendy and bebe and drinking and yeah...my head it's starting to hurt and I don't even know where the fuck my boyfriend are, I'm just getting stressed out

Clyde's house is so big so i think i might have to search for my boy like a LOT I'm just so stressed

later i find out that kyle is in a corner being FLIRTY with two dumb bitches that I don't even know, god I'm fucking stressed just too find out him with that girls

i don't say anything just go to grab my bag (that was near where kyle was 🫣) and fucking leave the party

I'm literally in the door ready to call an Uber to go to my house whe i heard the door open...oh no it's kyle

Kyle: babe! What's wrong why are you leaving

You: you know why I'm leaving kyle! Whe talk about this plenty of times i don't like to see you like... you know so flirty and it's seems like you don't fucking care

Kyle: but babe!! I'm not even being that "flirty" like c'mon we just arrived you can't go so easily just because i was being "flirty" *he makes emphasis on that exactly word and that make you so mad*

You: that's it!!! *Starts to walk so agressive leaving kyle behind* I'm fucking leaving you kyle and not only the party, this is all kyle we are breaking up, I'm so sick of this shit every time i try to talk to another guys like kenny or tolkien or even stan!!! "Oh y/n your being so flirty with them stop being such a slut" im so tired of it kyle just fucking leave me alone!

*without even noticing Kyle's eyes started to tearing up he don't even know if it's because he is drunk of it's the feeling of breaking up with his girlfriend,the feeling of being without you just scare the shit of him*

Kyle: what?! N-no! Please don't leave me babe no! I promise you ill be better I'll don't do more stupid shit like always please forgive me! *Grabs your hand and pulls you more closer to him and takes you by your waist*

You: ugh kyle please calm down... I'm walking home okey? There's nothing more that you could do 🤷🏻‍♀️

*you really were a little grossed out because he smells like Smirnoff and tequila mixed*

Kyle: nooo babe please *gets on his knees 🥹* I'll promise you i would change and your house it's not even near Clyde's house you're gonna be so tired if you walk home like this please at least let me drive you home *gets up and grab your hands* please y/n let me be with you :(

You: uuuhg fine kyle I'll let you drive me home and I'll will not break with you (you were so tired of everything so you don't even want to be mad rn 🙄)

Kyle: *sight* god i was so scared *he hugs you and you get on his car <3*

AAAAAAAAND THAT'S ALL BESTIES 😋!!

thank you for reading this was my first time doing this kinda stuff so forgive me if you see something wrong okay 🥹?

[bbgem329]

Things Are Never As They Seem—Chapter Eighteen

Pairings—Sebastian Stan x Actress!Reader, Sebastian Stan x OFC (PR relationship)

Summary

You and Sebastian Stan have been dating privately for over two years. Everything is perfect until he is coerced into a PR relationship when he signed with a new agency to advance his career. Trouble ensues…

Warnings

MINORS DNI! 18++. Language. Angst. Seb being the best bf ever. Mentions of sex. PR relationships. HW and it’s fakery. Long distance relationships.

NOTES

Thanks so much for your support and patience. Hope you enjoy this! ❤️❤️

Series Masterlist

—————

February 14, 2021

“Ugh.”

With an exaggerated groan, you unceremoniously dropped face first onto your bed.

It was Valentines day.

The first spent without Sebastian since you’d made your relationship official, to be exact.

Before him, you never really cared about trivial things like this but over the years you’d been together, he’d made it into something really special–something of importance.

And now that he wasn’t he to celebrate it with you as he usually did…

You really should have extended your vacation. At least then you would’ve been somewhere distracting, somewhere warm, and probably one a beach. Instead you were alone, stuck in the cold of the city that never sleeps.

This was all Sebastian’s fault.

It’s his fault that he took some dumb holiday and made it something of importance. He’d practically trained you to look forward and expect these kinds of things. The years he’d spent conditioning you to accept being spoiled.

Every Valentine’s day for the past four years, without fail, you’d woken to Sebastian with his mouth between your legs and then once you’d had your share of each other, he’d either take you to breakfast or make it himself. You’d spend the afternoon being pampered and spoiled or doing some sort of fun activity together. Eventually he’d send you home to get ready for a fancy dinner and he’d show up at your doorstep with flowers in suit. He always went all out to make you feel special and at the end of the night he’d take you home and make love to you all night.

Not this year though.

This year he was in Canada and you were home.

You weren’t pouting, really.

It was only–

You lifted your head to peek at the alarm clock on the nightstand.

–Seven thirty three in the morning.

There was still plenty of time for something special. You were confident he had something planned. You know he’d at least send some flowers. Maybe even some chocolate.

And he’d most definitely call you, maybe even initiate some good ole phone sex.

Everything would be okay.

Valentine’s was silly and pointless anyways.

You pulled yourself up on your hands and knees, crawling further up the bed before sliding back under the covers. It was still early and you had stayed up late to finish a book so you might as well get some more sleep. It wasn’t like you had anything better to do today.

You reached over to flick off the lamp just as Bentley hopped up on the bed to snuggle in beside you.

You curled yourself around him, brushing your fingers through his fur, “You’ll be my Valentine’s, right buddy?”

The pup let out a little groan in response.

“I’ll take that as a yes.”

You pressed a little kiss to his furry head, and let yourself relax back into the bed.

—————

You woke a little while later to your phone ringing incessantly throughout the room. Groggily, you reached over and snatched it off the nightstand. Without even looking at who it was, you answered, “Hello?”

“Good morning.” A familiar deep voice drawled, “Happy Valentine’s day, baby.”

“Seb.” You rubbed a hand over your face, a smile growing across your lips, “Happy Valentine’s day.”

“I got your packpage and the breakfast you had sent.” He spoke softly, nothing but adoration in his tone, “It was quite the surprise. I love you so much and thank you.”

“Of course.” You chuckled lightly, “There is a few more little things coming but I just miss you so much and I know you miss me and home so… I wanted to make today a little special for you too, ya know?” You jutted your bottom lip out in a pout. Even if he couldn’t see it, you were sure he would be able to tell you were wearing one, “I hate that you’re away today of all days. I want you here with me.”

“I know.” He sounded mournful, “I appreciate you so much and I’m sorry I can’t be there, sweetheart.” He paused for just a second, releasing a soft sigh, “I promise today will be worth it. I know I can’t be there but just know that I have something special planned for you and I swear I’ll make it up to you when I see you next.”

“I kno-”

“And I’ll make you cum so many times with my tongue-” He interjected, loudly.

“Sebastian!”

“And even if I can’t be there today, it’s my day off so you can call me at any point today. I just have a night shoot later tonight.” He was rambling now, talking faster and faster. “It’ll be just like I’m there but I have a plan and I really, really want you to enjoy yourself today.”

“Sebastian.” You giggled, “You’re rambling, baby. What’s got you so excited?”

He huffed and your smile grew tenfold, “I just really want you to have a good day. I feel so awful that I can’t be there for you. You know how much I love celebrating today with you.”

Your heart could’ve burst right out of your chest right then and there.

How lucky were you?

You’re man never failed to make me feel special. To feel cherished. To feel loved.

“Life happens.” You shrugged, voice light and soft, “There are going to be holidays and anniversaries, and birthdays we don’t get to spend together and you know what,” You paused to take a deep breath, “That’s okay. I love you, you love me and as long as we get to choose each other every day, love each other every day. Everything will be just fine.”

“But don’t act like you don’t love the gifts and being spoiled.”

You belt out a laugh, “Are you kidding?” You shook your head, snorting a little, “That’s what you took away from that?”

“Of course not, I love you.” He defended, “I’m just-”

“I’m teasing, Seb.” You chuckled, “You damn well know I would’ve been pissed if you didn’t do a thing for me today. I do love the gifts and you know what,” You threw a hand in the air, head swiveling and Bentley lifted his head from beside you in bed to give you an annoyed look and little huff, “It’s totally your fault. You made me into spoiled brat-”

“You are not a spoiled brat.”

“Yes.” You argued, tone louder than you intended it to be and Sebastian laughed, “You should’ve seen me this morning when I woke up to pee. I was all mopey and pouty, telling Bentley all about how ‘He better have something up his sleeve’.” You shook your head, scrubbing a hand over your face, “Stop spoiling me so much.”

“Yeah, okay.” He scoffed, “That’s not going to happen. On that note,” You could practically hear the smile on his face, “Go open your door, your breakfast has arrived and it should have the itinerary for the day.”

“What?” You jumped from the bed, tripping over yourself as you raced through your apartment, “Please tell me it’s that omelet I like from-”

You swung open the door, and sure enough there was a brown paper bag on your welcome mat.

“From La Bonbonniere?” He finished, obviously smug, “I got you the french toast too.”

“You know me so well.” You couldn’t wipe the smile from your face, even if you tried. You bent down to pick it up, giving Bentley a gentle push back when he tried to sneak through your legs. “Maybe too well.”

“Eat your breakfast, baby.”

You kicked the door shut, heading towards the kitchen.

“You have a pretty busy day so take a look at the list I’ve left and get your butt moving.”

Your brows furrowed, “You have to go?”

“I have a scheduled phone call with Gregg, something about Pam and Tommy.” He sighed softly, “I’m sorry. I’ll be free in an hour or two but give me a call this afternoon when you’ve returned home. You’ll understand when you see the note.”

“Oh, okay.” You smiled slightly, “I love you, Seb.”

“I love you more, baby.” He made a little kissing noise and then laughed, “I’ll talk to you later.”

“See ya.”

You ended the call, sliding your phone across the counter before tearing open the bag. You found the note at the bottom of the bag.

Happy Valentine’s Day, baby.

You mean more to me than you’ll ever know.

Thanks for choosing to love me everyday.

I love you so much.

And even though I can’t be with you today, just know you’ll be on my mind all damn day.

I hope I can make it up to you.

At the bottom of the bag you’ll find an envelope with everything you’ll need for the day.

Butterflies swirled wildly in your belly as you reached in and pulled out said envelope.

You didn’t waste a second ripping it open and dumping the contents across the marble countertops. You snatched the first slip of paper up to find it was an appointment for a massage at your favorite spa booked for ten thirty this morning. You peaked through the rest, a smile growing as you went—manicure and pedicure, a facial, and a hair touch up all scheduled for this afternoon.

You read over the last slip, brows furrowing as you pulled off the attached gift card.

And lunch at your favorite sandwich place in West Village.

You reached for your phone, fingers tapping furiously at the screen.

To Smexy Seabass:

WTF!! This is WAY too much.

From Smexy Seabass:

It’s not enough.

And that isn’t even all of it.

I love you.

To Smexy Seabass:

I’m serious.

Sebastian Stan.

From Smexy Seabass:

I am too.

*Kissing emoji*

ENJOY your pampering. You deserve it.

To Smexy Seabass:

I love you, you know that?

My care package looks pathetic now though.

From Smexy Seabass:

Fuck off. I love your packages, thank you very much.

To Smexy Seabass:

Just wait until you see what you’re getting in the mail later ;)

From Smexy Seabass:

WHAT????

BABE.

????

You shook your head with a smile and locked your phone, turning your attention to the breakfast laid out on the table. You had an hour to get to the spa and Sebastian would just have to wait until his surprise arrived.

You chuckled to yourself before shoveling a huge bite of french toast in your mouth.

—————

Never in your life had you felt so relaxed.

Your body was practically jello and your head was in the clouds by the time you reached your apartment. A quick jog up the steps and your cheeks ached from how big your smile grew when you found a giant bouquet of brightly colored zinnias and another box at your door.

You squat down to pick them up. With the box tucked under your arm, you gave the zinnias a quick sniff.

You knew exactly who they were from.

Zinnias

Lasting love, goodness, and constancy.

You let out a soft laugh.

You’d seen Catalina’s little Valentine's day post when it was sent in the groupchat with Macy and Blake. A selfie with a bouquet of blood red roses, the caption read ‘Lucky me’ with a rose emoji and the hashtag ‘happysavalentine’.

You know damn well she bought those for herself.

Come on? Roses? How boring.

And here was your man, putting actual thought into the flowers he sent you.

Lasting love.

Goodness.

Constancy.

So really, who's the lucky one?

Man, just when you thought you couldn’t love him more.

You unlocked and shoved open your door.

“Happy V-Day!”

You nearly fell on your ass. “Oh my God.” You caught yourself against the door, clutching everything in your arms to your chest. “What the fuck!”

You took in the bodies lounging around your living room.

Blake. Macy. Macy’s sisters, Laila and Amelia. Damion. Casey.

“How the hell did you get in here?”

Macy let loose an excited squeal and threw herself in your direction. Blake snatched the flowers and box out of your hand just before she squished you in a hug.

“Sebastian gave us the key.” She pulled back, hands resting on your shoulders. “Oh, he’s just so good to you, honey. He set this all up.” She waved her hand around the room which was decorated completely–covered in all pinks and reds. Balloons, streamers, a giant banner that said ‘Happy Galantines’. How you hadn’t noticed before, you weren't sure. “Well, I mean, we kinda helped but he ordered everything and paid for everything.”

You took in her outfit. Short, hot pink dress and matching pink heels, and the long, pink wig on her head. A glance around the room and you found everyone dressed similarly–all decked out in head to toe in pink or red or purple.

“Oh my God.” You brought your fingers to your lips, tears welling up in your eyes. “He loves me.”

“Oh, he really loves you.” Blake laughed, wrapping an arm over your shoulder as he pressed a champagne glass into your hand. It was pink too, of course. “Come now. We’ve been waiting on you.” He guided you down the hall, towards your bedroom. “We have an outfit and wig for you too. Lover boy helped pick it out.”

You threw a wave over your shoulder at the others lounging around your apartment, feeling dazed. “What are we doing?”

Blake rolled his eyes affectionately. You wondered briefly if he knew just how cool he looked dressed in red and how it really brought out the red in his hair. “Well you are going to get all dressed up–we choose Barbie pink for you. I thought it would look absolutely amazing with your skintone.” He dragged you into the master bedroom, and plopped you on the stool he’d obviously snagged from the kitchen, “I’m gonna do your hair and makeup. I got the short wig with bangs for you.”

“That sounds perfect to me.” You beamed at him before taking a generous sip of your champagne, “Do whatever you want. I trust you.”

“I know you do.” Blake winked, turning his attention to the supplies spread out along your counter. “We’re going out after we have dinner. Sebastian catered sushi so there is a fancy ass chef in your kitchen right now–Oh, I almost forgot. Here,” He tossed you a silky pink robe, “Put this on. And then we will begin.”

“Going out?”

“Yeah, to some club.” He shrugged, “It’s some fun ‘Galantines’ event. There will be drinking. There will be karaoke. There will be dancing.” He waved you off, “Go change. Hurry! Time is of the essence.”

You shook your head, smiling to yourself as you did as he said. It took you all of two seconds to strip your sweats and slip into the silky robe. You slipped back onto the stool, heart full, and your champagne glass was already almost gone.

Yeah, you were definitely the lucky one.

You pulled your phone out your pocket, tapping at the screen.

To Smexy Seabass:

I cannot believe you.

You are the best thing that ever happened to me.

Thank you.

From Smexy Seabass:

Believe it, baby.

I couldn’t be there so I brought the next best thing.

I’m heading to set to shoot some of the late scenes. I’ll be up late so call me when you get home, okay?

The more I shoot the sooner I’m back with you.

Please enjoy the night. Have fun with your friend and BE SAFE.

To Smexy Seabass:

I wish you were here ;(

But you’re right. This is the next best thing.

I love you so much.

And I’ll keep you updated.

From Smexy Seabass:

I love you more, baby.

You’re my whole world.

Talk to you later.

And send me lots of pics! Plz.

You smiled to yourself as you turned your phone off and slid back into your pocket. Blake hooked his phone up to your speaker, Fergie playing loudly throughout the echo-y space.

“Alright ready?”

You beamed up at him, head bobbing frantically.

“Good.”

You downed the last of your champagne, laughing loudly as Macy trailed into the room refilling it before you could even blink with a little wink.

Lucky. Lucky.

You supposed today wasn’t all so bad after all.

And even if Sebastian couldn’t be here, he’d more than made up for it.

You’d do exactly as he said and enjoy it.

—————

Taglist

@justlovelifeblog @inlovewith3 @buckybarnesandmarvel @sleutherclaw @snugglingbucky @perlaluna @littlewhiterose

@idontwannagomrstarkk @abihaaa14 @eclecticpatrolroadlawyer @sebsgirl71479 @getofffmydick @eccentricnos @barnesml @aira1995 @sweetwritingfanficfriend

[pillowfriends]

my thoughts on the WoT characters after book 5

before I start posting Lord of Chaos thoughts, I wanted to sum up what I think of the characters after The Fires of Heaven (and New Spring) so I can look back on it later. I’m sure I’m missing some, just listing everyone I have thoughts on.

Alanna: I have my eye on her after those sus forced bonding comments… time will tell but I don’t trust her at all. I like her though, she’s fun.

Asmodean: he was funny as hell, what a pathetic guy, and had objectively the most hilarious death in the series so far.

Aviendha: this is probably the character I have the least complicated feelings about. I just like her. she’s funny, she’s badass, her relationship with Rand is great.

Birgitte: a hot bicon. every word that comes out of her mouth is gold. she’s such a bro.

Egeanin: standout side character to me I love her so much. yes girl unlearn your cultural biases! and be unhinged and horny on main!! she better come back!!

Egwene: girl I want to like you but you're making it so hard 😭 as a character she's great. as a person I'm struggling with her dumbassery and her superiority complex and the way she's treating Nynaeve.

Elaida: she’s cringe and bad at her job but I kind of stan. she’s doing her best and it is absolutely not good enough and she’s being puppeted by the Black Ajah and only succeeded at deposing Siuan because a bunch of teenage boys stabbed people for her. I can’t even be angry at her tbh.

Elayne: book 5 was so great for Elayne. she's maturing a lot and she really shot up the list for me. her interpersonal relationships are so funny and I love how excited she is about making ter'angreal.

Faile: maybe absence makes the heart grow fonder but I miss her and want her back. she was so silly but also loved Perrin so much and I’m such a hopeless romantic that I loved the sappy parts.

Gareth Bryne: this man is a CREEP!! Siuan get AWAY from him! ugh ugh ugh. and I know it’s only going to get worse.

Galad: unfortunately this man is one of my favorite character archetypes. I didn’t vibe with him at first but now I really do.

Gawyn: I want to put him in a paper shredder. I am so angry at this man even after a full book to cool down post-coup. please let me deck him. I do think my feelings will change but right now I’m still angry as shit.

Graendal: problematic queen. do I think RJ will do anything interesting with her, probably not, but am I intrigued, yes.

Lan: THIS MAN BREAKS MY HEART DAILY. ohhhhh my god. not normal about him.

Lanfear: hmmm complicated feelings about book Lanfear. I found her introduction painful and annoying - it’s way too obvious - but she improved and I do love how crazy she is. it didn’t really sink in for me until her conversation with Rand in Tear that she’s delusional and obsessed with LTT to the point of being completely out of touch with reality, and therefore v scary. TLDR I love her now. RIP gone too soon.

Leane: I have no idea what’s cooking with her, I just have to RAFO. I’m either going to think she’s an icon or get angry at RJ for being sexist and I don’t know which.

Liandrin: the balls on this woman are actually insane, trying to Compel Moggy. she’s way too cartoonishly evil to be really interesting though. but she makes so many sexually charged dog references which I love tbh.

Logain: he’s fine I guess. hard to tell where his story is heading and he kind of hasn’t done anything.

Loial: he has never done anything wrong in his entire life, he's perfect and I love him.

Mat: I've come around and I like him now. his memory stuff is really interesting and so is the way he interacts with fate/the Pattern.

Melaine: best Wise One I love her so much.

Min: she’s never clicked with me as a character and I think her motivation is kind of dumb and repetitive. I also really dislike how salty and disrespectful she is towards Siuan but that has to do with my personal issues about the Siuan plotline so I can’t totally blame her for that.

Moghedien: I NEED to put her in a petri dish and poke her with a stick. girl you are not subtle about your petplay kink. somehow she’s scary and pathetic at the same time and I just love her a lot.

Moiraine: I can’t even put it into words. she’s my everything.

Morgase: I feel so fucking bad for her, her POVs were horrific, what a survivor. I'm excited for when she gets a bigger plotline.

Nynaeve: my favorite character who’s on page at present. first of all she has a Forsaken collared. second of all she’s so angry and I love angry women. also she has no self awareness which makes her POVs very amusing, but also sometimes devastating — I love her struggling with fear and her perceived cowardice in TFOH.

Perrin: I constantly forget he exists. not in a bad way but not really in a good way either - he’s just bland to me.

Rand: he is my idiot baby boy. go insane faster please it’s interesting.

Rahvin: good riddance you creepy fuck. not even awful in a compelling way to me, just awful. good as a character, well-written, but AAAA.

Siuan: her arc after being stilled is distressing to me and I don’t like reading it - her loss of power and influence, the way the other Aes Sedai all treat her, the sexual harassment… so I have a hard time separating that out from Siuan herself. I’m… torn. I love some of her scenes and some feel very out of left field. we’ll RAFO again.

Suroth: GIVE ME MORE. her POV was fascinating and she’s so awful.

Thom: against my best wishes, I actually like him now. he’s so dad coded and protective of Nynaeve and Elayne, and a badass, and has a good sense of humor.

Verin: what an icon!! favorite Aes Sedai bar none now that Moiraine is gone.

[inevitably there will be a part 2 when I realize I forgot some really obvious people]

[dialovers-translations]

DIABOLIK LOVERS MORE CHARACTER SONG Vol.1 Arcadia by Sakamaki Ayato Mini Drama “Tide of Battle”

Original title: 勝敗の行方

Source: Diabolik Lovers CHARACTER SONG Vol. 1 Mini Drama

Audio: Here

Seiyuu: Midorikawa Hikaru

Translator’s note: These CDs take me back because I used to translate a lot of these generic ‘Diaboy sucks your blood in a random situation’ CDs which define the earlier era of the franchise. :p There isn’t anything special about the script, but I suppose it’s still enjoyable for those who stan the character. 

*Flip flip flip*

“...I lost. ーー Ugh.”

You tilt your head to the side.

“...Didn’t you hear me when I said I lost!? That should be pretty obvious since you have no cards left in your hand! ...Damnit. Why couldn’t you pull the joker? (1) You sure have some nerve to win from me, Chichinashi!”

Ayato gets up and starts walking away.

“And to think I was so kind as to play with you to kill some time...”

You tell him that there’s nothing to be so upset about.

 “Haah...? I’m not mad! You really think I’d lose my temper over some stupid card game with someone like you!? Idiot! Don’t think so highly of yourself! ーー Hmph!”

You note that he looks upset.

“...Aah? Oh shut up already.”

You tell him to stop sulking.

“Haah!? Me, sulking? Don’t be spoutin’ bullcrap!”

*Rustle* 

“Whatcha grabbin’ the hem of my shirt for? You’ll stretch out the fabric, let go.”

You insist that he’s being a grump.

“Yeah, I’m in a bad mood. I absolutely loathe the thought of losin’ after all.”

You promise to make it up to him.

“Hm? You want to cheer me up that badly?”

You seem determined.

“...Idiot. Don’t make such a serious face.”

He leans in close.

“There’s only one thing for you to do to accomplish said goal, no?”

*Rustle*

“Let me suck my blood. ...That’ll fix my mood. So, what do you say?”

You nod and pull down your collar.

*Rustle* 

“Hehe...If only you were this obedient all the time. ...I guess you want me to suck from your neck since you pulled down your collar? You’ve really upped your begging game, huh? ...Sure, I’ll suck from here as you wish.”

*Rustle rustle*

Ayato bites you.

“Hahn...Nn...”

*Sluuuurp*

“Mmh...”

*Sluuuurp*

“...Hah.”

*Rustle*

“...Ah? No, not yet. So gimme more...Mmh...”

*Sluuuurp*

“Nn...”

*Sluuuurp*

“Hah...”

*Rustle*

“What’s with that face, huh? Why are you the one feelin’ good when this is supposed to be a way of liftin’ my spirit? Well, I guess you could say that seein’ you pull that sorta expression puts me in a good mood too.”

Ayato continues sucking your blood.

“Hahn...Mmh...”

*Sluuuurp*

“...Hah. I already feel a lot better. But I guess I haven’t quite had enough just yet.”

*Sluuuurp*

“Hahn...Nn...”

*Sluuuurp*

“...Hah.”

*Rustle*

“Hey. Don’t think you’re the shit just ‘cause you beat me at cards once. That was a dumb luck just now. You’re no match for me. I’m sure this situation should make that very clear. You have no other choice but to let me have my way with you. ...For the rest of your life. ーー Right! Next time I’m bored, I’ll toy with you instead. No way I’m ever touchin’ that stupid card game again.

You chuckle.

“...What’s so funny, huh!? I’m not frustrated or anythin’...! I just don’t like how you made such a cocky face after winnin’ against me!”

You deny his statement.

“Hell yeah you did! You were grinnin’ from one ear to another! It hella pissed me off!”

You apologize again.

“Idiot. Stop sayin’ sorry already. ...Besides, now I know that card games are a horrible way to kill time. Those sorta games are for lil’ kids. If I want to have fun...”

*Rustle*

“You’re the ultimate toy. ...Right, Chichinashi? Hehe...”

*Rustle*

“Come on. Lift your face. I’ll kiss you next. ...Didn’t you hear me earlier when I said I wasn’t satisfied yet?”

You hesitate.

“Come on, part your lips already. Mmh...”

Ayato kisses you passionately.

“...Hah. ...Hehehe. You really make the best faces. I’m in a great mood again thanks to that. Haha...Aren’t you glad? You didn’t like seeing me upset, correct? You were grabbin’ onto my shirt and actin’ all meek...I guess you were worried ‘bout putting me in a bad mood, huh? Haha...Are you really that crazy ‘bout me?”

You stubbornly shake your head.

“...Ah? You wanna claim that you don’t like me at all?”

He leans in close again.

“Like you could ever say those words. ...If anything, I wouldn’t let you spout nonsense like that. Mmh...”

*Smooch*

“Nn...”

*Smooch*

“...Hahn...Nn...”

*Smooch*

“...What’s the matter? Reached your limit already?”

he continues making out with you.

“...Hahaha. Seems like you’re no match for me after all. ...Still. Right. If there was one category in which you could beat me, it would be with how much you love me. I guess...? I wouldn’t mind admittin’ defeat in that regard. ...I mean, just look at how esctatic you are just from some kisses...Mmh...”

*Smooch*

“I know damn well...Whenever I suck your blood or kiss you, you’ve got ‘I want more’ written all over your face...I bet you’re actually aware of this as well, right? ...Hahaha. You really are somethin’ else, givin’ your feelings away so easily.”

You grow embarrassed.

“...Fine. If you admit it, I wouldn’t mind givin’ you exactly what you want.”

*Rustle*

“To your heart’s content, that is. ...Mmh.”

*Rustle*

“Aah...? What’s the problem? Would you rather have me bite you instead? Hahaha...No need to look so disappointed. Don’t worry, I’ll make sure to suck your blood afterwards. I happen to like the face you make...”

*Smooch*

“...in either scenario, you see. Mmh...”

*Smooch*

“Nn...”

ーー THE END ーー

Translation notes

(1) They are playing ババ抜き or ‘baba-nuki’, which is the Japanese name for ‘Old Maid’. Both players take cards from each other’s hand in search of pairs. However, there is one card replaced by the Joker and whoever is left with it at the end, loses.

[fromtheseventhhell]

I hope George, after saying everyone hates Alicent (man is a treasure. Well… in many ways. So annoying in others like keeping us waiting forever for the real ending) I hope he says Sansa is a very unpopular character and I hope he admits he doesn’t enjoy writing her that much. I would relish the meltdown of the dumb Sansa stans and that brat Sophie Turner. All they do is make me hope Sansa either dies or gets such a boring awful (as in not fun) ending where the other Starks and Dany are having fun together and don’t really care where Sansa is. That’s… far fetched, the second one, but ugh… those annoying idiots make me despise Sansa. And of course… the show and Sophie Turner don’t help

What's funny is that he has already made similar comments about Sansa. He had no issue with coming right out and saying that she was one of the least favorite characters. He also often mentions her in comparisons to Arya, one his personal favorite characters. Her stans just ignore it cause what does the author know about the books?? 🤪

I try not to let fandom influence me on how I feel about the story, so personally I can still enjoy the parts of Sansa's character and story I like + want a happy ending for her even with how her stans act. I do understand getting annoyed at them because they spend so much time hating on other characters just to prop her up. They also get mad at people for talking about how she's actually written in the book so it makes it difficult to even discuss her. Either way though, they're going to be angry about her story in the books because it's not going to be a fairytale ending for her like they hope. The most popular idea of her ending among supposed "Sansa antis" is that she becomes Lady of the Vale and they still hate that because it isn't important enough🙄

[jacky-rubou]

ten (almost eleven now) pm rambling about my fic 'the things you can't live without' because I am going insane and need to talk about a specific thing about it or I'll explode.

When Ford was dying in Stan's arms, I didn't make him visibly angry about being brought back home. Except for like a brief moment where he touches on the risk of bringing him back, but not yelling or belittling him directly for it. Even thanking Stan for letting him see him once more before giving up the ghost.

Maybe it's completely obvious to everyone else why I did that, but it was because Ford knew he was going to die and he was too weak and tired to gather the energy needed for anger. And... I think seeing how distressed Stan was while trying to save him would've actually made an actively dying Ford not want his last moments spent on dumb grudges, to not force Stan to remember the moment as one filled with anger. So his last words were his earnest attempt at keeping everything okay between them for Stan's sake, since Ford wasn't long for the world anyway. And at that moment, he really meant the words more than anything, regardless of what he would've been angry about had he not been gravely injured. regardless of any pretense.

idk, Ford doesn't seem to me like he would be so angry that he would die in Stan's arms while loudly hating him. maybe I'm silly and presumptuous, but I like to think he'd push aside his grudge in the moment of dying in that instance. just knowing the grudge wasn't worth it while facing his very real mortality, and feeling any attempts at anger wash away as he's cradled in Stan's arms and hearing his panicked words and realizing how much he was loved and deciding to genuinely reciprocate because this was his twin who loved him and every bit of anger didn't matter anymore because he's now home and seeing his twin after thirty painfully long years he didn't know he was missing him for due to bitterness.

ugh and how his final 'i love you' was broken by his death, the last word only airily whispered in the last breath... just making me insane man. this whole fic is making me insane. and it's mine so what's my excuse?

anyway, rambling done. twas nice to release the feelings I'm having about Ford while he's dying in Stan's arms in my fic.

[tortoisebore]

fav wolfstar fics?? yes i’m looking for new reccs and i’m also rlly curious

omgggg i have so many how can i chooseee 🫢 i feel like a lot of these are staples so you might’ve already read them but here are my all time favs (in no particular order except Blends/Names is absolutely my #1)

Blends (and the WIP sequel Names) by rvltn909

ugh such an OG & one of the first wolfstar fics i remember reading!! one thing ab me is i’m going to absolutely devour a coffee shop AU. throw in a university AU on top of it?? bitch i’m seated. because this was my first wolfstar fic i feel like these characterizations are the blueprint, every other remus & sirius are knockoffs of these two. this remus is just like me fr i love him & his stupid little angry self-loathing anxious brain so bad. also the sirius POV in Names is to die for, mans just won’t stop talking i love him sm

A Black Mass Over Highway Ninety by greenvlvetcouch

oh my GOD i subscribed to this one when green posted like chapter four?? or five?? and legitimately screamed my head off every time i got the emails. like i was blowing off work and reading ao3 on the job when this shit updated. i love toxic codependent wolfstar so bad i ate this up like a dying man i’m so serious i’ve already reread it once since it was completed like two weeks ago lmfao, every new thing green posts i make it my new religion

Impossible Things by accioromulus

this one ojhmygod i feel like i reread it about once every three months. they are so 🤲 jdhffhfh god i love losers who pine so bad they feel on the verge of death

Beneath a Big Blue Sky by eyra

i reread this like??? once every two months??? everything eyra writes is in my bookmarks bc i love their work so so much but this one in particular gets lodged in my brain so bad omfg. this remus is my sweet precious grumpy little angel and this sirius is so sweet and soft and caring he makes me cry?? Hollow Places is my other fav from this author, their writing style just makes my brain buzz in the best way, they are a huge huge inspo for me

Hard to Find by accioromulus

another one of the first i remember reading! little summer road trip with a big ole side of pining and yearning and sharing a lil couch to sleep?? yes please. the banter between the four boys is my favvvv in this one, they are so stupid and dumb i love them

LIEBESTRAUMMMM OH MY GOD by lunchbucket

there are exactly two (2) exes getting back together fics i can stomach and this is one of them. this remus & me are the same person i think, reading his journey throughout this fic was sort of healing in a way?? i initially started it bc i’ve played piano my entire life and love a lil music AU moment, but this fic genuinely revived my love for classical music and liszt’s compositions in particular. it is a masterpiece

Staying Strangers by 3amAndCounting

i am not kidding i’ve been subscribed to this fic since like??? the 10th chapter? i pride myself in having been on board w this one before everyone else lmfao. this is literally the only ‘texting fic’ i’ve genuinely loved, these characterizations are so sweet and perfect and i will protect this sirius w my entire life 🤺

This Is Not Your Year by montparnasse

i think this is the only canon-compliant in my entire ao3 bookmarks bc i enjoy being delusional and i require a happy ending or i will d*e. however comma, i cannot overstate how much i LOVE this one. this writing is absolutely devastating oh my god i’m not an angst person (re: delusional) and this one is so angsty but ugjshfjffj it’s so gritty and real and raw and it makes my heart ACHE for them

note: i am about to embark on a journey and start crimson rivers. i’ve avoided it since like last summer bc i wanted to wait until it was completed but then it turned into a 700k beast, so here we are. i am not (!!!!) a jegulus person but what i’ve seen of this fic is so so good so i’m going to do it for the wolfstar & bc i’m a hunger games stan

tyyy for the ask!! i always love reading other people’s recs but i’ve never made a list myself, this was very fun

[saltygilmores]

Thoughts While Watching Gilmore Girls, Season 2, Episode 13 ("A Tisket A Tasket") Part 5, I Give Up

Just for funsies here's Jess calling Dean an idiot and Idiot admitting it.

Before I continued to slog through this absolutely mind numbing DALA (Dean and Lorelai Affair) episode, I uttered 6 words that I hope won't come back to bite me in the ass: "This can't possibly get any worse." Ahahahahahaha. There are 14 minutes left in the episode. I'm fucked. I've been on this one way too long and I'm determined to finish this. I'm just going to enjoy this Literati on a Bridge break. I'm going to my happy place where Dean doesn't exist and Rory is an orphan because Lorelai (and Chrisopher) don't exist and every episode is just 45 minutes of this.

"I'm so much happier here." R: "Why were you screwing with Dean an hour ago but you're suddenly being nice to me?" J: "Well it's the screwing with Dean that's an important step to getting here so I could be nice to you."

Ugh he took the fucking Quarter On A String so now I have to suffer through that fucking Lost and Found episode. God damn it Mariano! Why are the pretty ones always so dumb?

Did I mention that he is so pretty. I'm legally obligated to say that at least twice per Jess Episode. After Rory and Jess part ways, we cut to Rory returning home with a bag from the bookstore and Lorelai immediately shifts full gear into Weirdly Suspicious & Passive Aggressive Mode. When Rory admits she visited a bookstore and had a slice of pizza with Jess (oh the horror!) then goes to her room, Lorelai immediately shuffles her passive aggressive, suspicious little feet right in after her. 90% of the time that Lorelai and Rory meet to talk on their couch after Rory has just departed from the company of Dean or Jess, especially at night or at the end of the episode, it means Lorelai is about to dish out some horrible, horrible wisdom/life coaching. The Couch is where we have witnessed many classic mother-daughter bonding moments, such as the time Lorelai asked Rory to make sure Jess got his rabies shots before she slept with him. Ah, the couch.

Mmmm yep. *collects money*

SIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGH. Here we go. I think it was the great Michael Scott who once said, Why are you the way you are? Honestly, every time I try to enjoy something fun or exciting, you make it...not that. I hate so much about the things that you choose to be.

Ya know, I stan Rory more and more lately with how she stands up for Jess. Sorry your mom's a bitch. How many more tmes I can rant into The Void about Lorelai's unhealthy grudge with Jess? How many more times can I point out that Lorelai has only had one prolonged interaction with Jess, while she's known Dean twice as long and he's been rude and used a condescending tone of voice with her many times, including the first time they met (on Willy Wonka night) and it literally just happened again moments ago. It's just mindblowing to me how she will not let this FUCKING GO and SIXTEEN years later in AYITL when she is married to his uncle she is STILL making digs at him over him being rude to her when he was 17, joking about how he should have a baseball thrown at his head.

I honestly don't think I could love Rory Gilmore more at this point. Bless her rationality and sweet heart and cute rose sweater that looks like a swirl of that strawberry icing you squeeze over instant oatmeal. Are you witnessing a historical moment right now? The birth of a Rory Stan? Sort of. It won't last forever, but since I won't go past season 4 anymore, then yes.

The "things she's seen and heard" are just her regurgitating what Dean told her 5 minutes ago. LOL. She just took this kid's word as gospel, without even questioning it. The DALA is so fucked up, man! Lorelai is way too concerned with the lives of teenage boys! If Dean told Lorelai to jump off a bridge would she do it?

I really wish this were my gritty unrated Gilmore Girls spinoff titled The Hollow because I would have someone on this show actually acknowledge that Jess is honestly something of a miracle. His father abandoned him as a newborn, he had a tumultuous, negligent, inconsistent, possibly even abusive upbringing. His mother drank while she was pregnant with him. He grew up watching unsavory men in his mother's life circle in and out like a revolving door (according to Liz The Worst, one of them even died). Yet he doesn't turn to any real crime, drugs, alcohol, or even sex (okay, well bless his heart he tries there but people seem to cockblock him at every turn). HE SKIPS SCHOOL TO WORK AT WALMART. In real life kids like that are really lucky if the worst path they go down after that kind of chilhood merely involves them stealing loose change from an old fucknugget like Taylor Doose who deserves to be stolen from anyway. That bridge should have been fixed 10 years ago. Here's some of the train wreck. There were no survivors.

If Dean needs someone to talk to that badly he can get a diary or a dog or a sock puppet or like, one fucking friend his own age. I think half of the issues of this show could be solved if these people had more friends. Can't Taylor Doose swing some kind of town wide Bid-A-Friend Auction? Or emotional support animals?

Sure but like, did you ever stop to think that you and Dean are actually his only "enemies" and it's completely one sided because he couldn't care less about you, and also, your enemy is a 17 year old boy and you're a full grown adult lmao. Crazy lady. I wonder how Jess feels knowing he's the most exciting thing that's ever happened to a town full of boring nobodies who will go nowhere and do nothing while he will eventually makes millions of dollars from his best selling novels that get turned into blockbuster movies. Maybe someone will even make a movie about his life. I'm going to think about who could play Milo/Jess in a movie about himself while Lorelai yammers on and remains in denial about how insane she is. What do you think? Lorelai says Rory is "So young and naive, so nice and gives everyone a chance"; what she's really saying is "Jess doesn't deserve a chance, not even from you." I stoppped watching at this point and only skimmed a few more seconds. I saw that Rory stormed off, Lorelai and Rory fight over it at FND, Emily is confused, Lorelai says "I didn't like Dean at first because I didn't know him, I don't like Jess because I know him." You know what, there are times when this show starts to get my under my skin so much that I’m just not enjoying it and there’s no point in finishing the episode. In conclusion, Lorelai sucks and ruins everything and my number one Hill To Die On will continue being that Dean and Lorelai are sleeping together because there is no other logical explanation possible for why she talks about him like this. Goodnight!

Edit: guys, sorry that I was so enraged with Lorelai The Worst that I managed to gloss over the fact that Rory and Jess went on a Book Shopping and Pizza PRE-DATE 😍😍😍😍 THEIR FIRST ONE!

In my Gilmore Girls spinoff The Hollow we would see every minute of every Pizza and Book date and pre-date I promise you this 🥰 No skimping!

[he4rts4alexis]

Prom Royalty

Pairing: Clyde x reader

Warnings: profanity if you squint a little

About: Clyde and you bribe Kyle into making y'all prom royalty

"y/n we don't have all day pick a dress" Clyde says impatiently. "I'm trying these are so pretty" you say as you look at all three red color dresses.

You got the tight dress that showed all your curves and cleavage "don't you think that's a bit to revealing?" Clyde says still look at the dress "M~ no just right let's go" you say as you go back to the changing room and take off the dress. You soon get out and buy the dress. "I still don't think it's a good dress for prom" Clyde says unsure if he like it or not.

"stop questioning me and get in the car" you say handing him the keys. "We really need to win the prom king and queen" you say looking out the window. "How are we supposed to do that when Tolkien and nichole are a couple their literally the school's golden couple" Clyde says still paying attention to the road. "I have an idea let's bribe Kyle isn't he in charge of the votes" you say looking at Clyde "how we don't even talk to him or know what things he likes" Clyde says unsure if he wants to go through with it. "Yes but his best friend does I will text him" you say as you take out your phone

I didn't feel like doing the fake text messages😕

Y/n: Stann I need your help it's an emergency

Stan: yea what's wrong

Y/n: what's Kyle's favorite thing in the world

Stan: the Denver nuggets basketball team

Y/n: alright thanks

"what did he say?" Clyde asks while looking at you

"A stupid basketball team" you say rolling your eyes

"hmm what if we get him tickets to it" Clyde says confidently "do you know how much money that will be?" "Loren we'll be fine I'll make the money back by selling more shoes this is my last prom I wanna make it count". You hated when he gave you those sad sob stories but you did it anyway because you wanted to win to obvi and bought the tickets for Kyle. "Uh Kyle Clyde wanted me to give you these" you say before handing the tickets to him "A-ARE THOSE DENVER NUGGET TICKETS!?" "Yeah but you can only have them if you let me and Clyde be prom queen and king" "y/n you know I can't do that" "you can do it it's just you don't want to are you sure you don't want to" you say swinging the two tickets in his face. "Ugh fine just give me the tickets and no take backs" "Kyle I may not be as smart as you but I'm not dumb either you'll get them after I see crowns on me and Clyde's head"

And with that you walked off

"what did he say?" "Oh he's gonna do it he has no choice" "are you holding the tickets hostage?" "Maybe oh don't judge me I'm desperate" "not as desperate as me" he pulls you in to kiss you.

*Time skip to the night of the prom*

After your mom takes the last photo for prom of the night you and Craig got into the red shiny car he rented "you sure this is gonna work y/n?" "Clyde stop rushing me" "alright fine" You two make your way to the decorated gym "hey y/n" Heidi says "hey where's Eric?" "He's by the food table stuffing his face" she says as she started to pout. "Ha typical Cartman" "shut the fuck up Clyde" you elbow him "anywho see you later Heidi" "bye y/n"

*Time skip to the near end of prom*

Wendy and Kyle get on stage to pronounce prom Royalty tonight. "Tonight's prom king is... Clyde Donavon!" Clyde walks up on stage whispering a "thank you" to Kyle "And also the true beauty of the night the prom queen of tonight's wonderful prom is... Y/n L/n!" You walk on stage and hands Kyle his tickets. The floor clears as you and Clyde have the royal dance "he really did it" "ofc Kyle would do anything if it requires a basketball" "heh yeah" Clyde pulls you in for a warm and passionate kiss.

That was a bullshit ass ending but yeahhh I swear the only reason I wrote this is because it's been in my drafts for weeks I wanted to write for Tolkien but I did not know how I can turn those titles into one shots 💀

[what-a-creative-user-nana]

LMK ep 4 Review

Major Lmk spoiler under cut <3

Banger introo i Love

xD Pigsy ranting abt a carrot???? "a BEEautiful CaRRoT" v

Also TANG <33

Lol i love that Tang's a pessimist xDD

HOLD ON HOL UP xDDD ThIS v

(im so sorry) GFJQEYGMEA

UhhH This Creepy LADy vv

UHH TANG STAY AWAY FROM HER

Also: This rando w/ the fierce LasHEss

Lol- B got RejEcTed by Tang <3333

UH PIG WHAT ARE YOU DOING v

THERE ARE DISGUSTING VEGGIES THERE PIGS R U DUMb???????

Tang *looks at the veggies*- Are you blind?

LooK In mY ~exClusiVe WaRES~-WOman?? Sthu v

SHE'S SHADY PIGSY U IDIOT

UGH PIGS NOW LOOK WHAT YOU DID!! YOU GOT TANG CAPTURED!! v

YOU OWE HIM ~Free Noodles for life~

YUSS Mei the VIdeO Game Queen Pt. 2 +SAndy!!! v

Mk: GUYSSSSS!! PIGSY'S MISSING!! v

Mk: HE DIDNT OPEN THE SHOP THIS MORNING! v

D-Does he really open eVeRyDay??

This: ??? v

Mk: Oh, and I just realized now.. Tang is also missing.

WHY DID HE SAY IT LIKE THAT'S NOT A BIG DEAL!!! IT'S TANG!

Mk to Mei: Uh, how did you get these videoes? v

Mei: Oh, I attached cameras to you a while back. *says it like it's no biggie* v

We stan a protective quEEN

Uh, Speaking of Queen--- IS THAT THE SPIDER QUEEN THAT IVE HEARD SO MUCH ABT v

i KNEW she was shady- Also Mk: AAH SCARY NIGHTMARE HOLE!!

I just love Mk in this one

Mk: EW, A SPIDER DEMON? C'MON NO! eW, yuck- I hate spiders HATE HATE!! WITH THEIR EYES-AND FEET AND HAIRY BUTTS v

Can relateee

*Deep voice*- OPERATION: Safe-Tang-And-Pigsy-From-The-Nightmare-Hole™ v

ThIS GANGGG vv

Pedestrians beTTER RUN BC THE SANDY-CAT-DRAGON-BURST SQUAD IS ON THE WAYY

UH, FORGETTING ABT THE PIG 4 A SEC SOMEONE SAVE TANG AAAHHHH v

WELL, SQ, HOW U GON GET FAME BY KILLING PIGS AND TANGG???

XDDDD I SHOULD NOT BE LAUGHING BUT WHEN SQ SAID "~Dinner~" I IMMEDIATELY THOUGHT "Heh, roast pig" WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME XDDSUGFUGMEIUG

Back to THE RESCUE SQUAD- YEAHAHH v

Uh, wow they.. uh.. just let themselves in- UM MK, MEI THAT"S NOT A VERY SAFE POSITION v

UH- LOSER! SHUT UPP v you areNOT ALL THAT

UUUUGHH TANGGG!! WHY WOULD U TELL HER MK's COMING!! Like ILY BUT you gotta learn to SHUT UP ;n; v

Tang: Don't worry, Pigsy. Mk's far too smart to fall for one of her traps!

*Meanwhile with Mk* v

Me w/ spiders: v

Mk: This place is full of WEBS AND HORROR (can relatee)

:OO ANgsty Nightmare FUEL???? v

Her: ~Don't tell me you're scared of SPIDERS!~ *gets all up in his face*

Me: BACK OFFFF

<YES THIS IS ALL PIGSY'S FAULT IHSFHAHHHHHHHHHH WHY U DUMBB>

OPERATION- Save-Mk-From-The-Nightmare-Hole™ v

<SQ: Hah, you're the kid Monkie King chose?

Mk: No, I'm the Monkie MANN>

I SHRIEKED- GET AWAY FROM HIMM vvvv

HAHAH THE SQUAD'S GONNA KILL YOUUUUu

<YAY RESCUE SQUAD SAVES THE DAY (heyy that rhymedd-ishh)>

Th-THis Picture is going on my Wallpaper RN~~ v

OPERATION- Rescue-Tang-And-Pigsy? v

YEAH! SUCCESS! (With absolutely no trauma to take home for later!!)

*Angry screaming at the sky*- SHE'S GONNA COME BACKKK!?!?!?!

Alrighty! I've hit my pic-limit soo I'm outie! Til next time~

[wondernus]

alright nu, I remember giving you a list of recs before and now I bring more with commentary 😏 now you don’t have to read any of these but they’re some of my current reads that I dig :D

Starting off with…..

1. Lion Heart by Choi Soohyun

Manwha, Josei, modern, medical romance, married-to-work-chaebol x equally-married-to-work-surgeon, he fell first then fell harder, hilarious side characters, contract relationship, immaculate chefs kiss, INSANE ART pls they’re so hot

Season 1 complete, season 2 just started

2. The Top Couple Is a Bit Sweet

Manhua, shoujo but walks the line of josei a little, modern, romcom drama, showbiz, another contract relationship 🤩, more insane art with a hot couple, I haven’t read very far but the vibes and chemistry are off the charts tbh, he totally fell first, power couple frfr

Season 1 almost complete I think

3. I Stan The Prince

Manwha, shoujo, historical but lots of modern references, romcomfan, TOOTH ROTTING SWEETNESS, ML has actual mfing emotions and shows them, she fell first he fell harder ordeal, original work so no novel, not as cliche as you may think, MORE INSANE ART, one of my top faves of all time omg, this one is for the kpoppies

Season 1 complete, season 2 just picked up after a two year hiatus 🥹

4. The Ice Guy and His Cool Female Colleague

Manga, josei, modernc slice-of-life, supernatural office romcom, SO WHOLESOME, lot of memes in this one, ML is sososo sweet, FL is too cool, japanese lore is what makes this supernatural, side couples are equally amazing, just super cute light read

Volumes 1-7 completed, vol.8 ongoing

5. Run, Meil

Manwha, shoujo, isekai, historical, romcom, memes are abundant here too, girl gang is so comedic, ML is sweet, FL isn’t dumb and is actually smart nor does she care about original storyline, og!fl is a cutie too and gets her own happy ending, miscommunications are mild and get spoken through, I’m super picky about shoujos but I love this one

Season 1 complete, season 2 TBA

6. The Girl and The Geek

Manhwa, josei but cute like a shoujo, modern, romcom, slide of life, MAJOR CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT, super sweet and natural love, they make each other better 🥹🥹🥹, their families can be annoying, her family I can’t really forgive, but his family is only initially overbearing but you def warm up to them, humble rich CEO dude, miscommunications but their handled pretty well and actually does something for the plot, ugh the story is so good

COMPLETED WITH SPECIAL EPISODES

idk if you follow Stray Kids but ml is so han jisung coded, there’s a recent photo of han that is soooo this ML 😭😭

HONORABLE MENTION BC IDK IF I REC’D IT BEFORE BUT I’VE TALKED ABOUT IT

7. You Are My Desire (aka Daydreaming About Me)

Manhua, josei, romcom drama, starts off in high school but later half is in college, first loves, some mature topics in relation to family problems, idek what to say but god I just love them sfm and I think the artist is from the same studio as the Hidden Love artist, the novel is sauuuuur good, comic does it justice but I recommend the novel even more

Season 1 ongoing but novel is complete

HI AUTUMN!! i'm sorry this was from so long ago alskfjlasjdf but I added every single one of these recs onto my reading list so I'll be getting to them when I have time and when they're close to being finished. here are some of my recs in return!!! (these are all completed)

L -> R

father I don't want this marriage: I think this one just ended but GOD I love a good reincarnation manhwa and a DILF. the plot is really cliche but I just love the genre so much

the dilettante: E2L mafia member x secret agent. what more do you want?? (I wanted so much more that I looked up the original korean novel and went to a forum to read about what happens in the novel)

bring the love: I hate how some people dropped this because they didn't like the art style but this literally has to be one of the best romances I've ever read. the characters are mature and they communicate really well. they touch upon a lot of social topics that aren't usually talked about in the historical genre. green flags all around.

do you know anything about tpo kageyama-kun?!: plugging a kagehina dj because I squealed when I read this and literally reread it over and over bc of how cute it was