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whump-town · 3 years

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Lie to Me

Chapter Two

Warnings:

Chapter One

It’s not as bad as it looks.

Derek Morgan stands in place, his right hand coated in a drying layer of the foaming pink blood Hotch had choked up. He’s staring ahead, eyes growing an unfocused haze as his body and mind struggle to keep pace with all that’s just happened. No nurse has stepped in to remove him, medical staff simply navigate around him. It’s violating, it feels like he’s being given a front-row seat to a trauma no one’s supposed to witness. Unmoving, he’s unable to look away. Tears start to cloud his vision but someone has to stay. Someone has to see.

The catheter that they use to suction his mouth is clear. The tubing long and spirally, the room’s occupants able to see the sea foam blood leaving Hotch’s lungs. He’s sat up on the stretcher, shirt cut-off in a long simple swipe. Left to be packed into a bag, the once white fabric speckled in pink. There’s a cloth against the upper section of his chest, catching drool and blood that the doctors miss with the tube hunting the corners of his mouth. Hotch heaves, producing nothing from his empty stomach than acid and thin, soft pink spit. He twists away from the catheter, sucking in wet wheezing breathes. Sounds like he’s breathing through a straw, waterlogged and thick.

A nurse directs Derek closer to the bed with a hand on his bicep, her kind words of encouragement going over his head as he pulls his shell-shocked body closer to Hotch’s. That whispered, useless comment bursting through the space between them. It’s not as bad as it looks. Derek finds that incredibly hard to believe, no matter how neatly they wipe Hotch’s mouth and rid the space of blood-tinged rags.

He’d sat in the ambulance for ten minutes listening to Hotch choke on blood. Heard the EMTs warning the hospital about a pulmonary aspiration, watched them debate intubating Hotch while he was still conscious enough to writhe on the stretcher. Trying to pull his body away from the steady hands placing an IV, to sit up and get away from them. Derek could do nothing, had been forced to

It’s not as bad as it looks. He’s assured, taking the thin, uncushioned chair at Hotch’s side. Close enough now to see the pink of Hotch’s dried blood on the side of his cheek. To hear the wheezing breathes he’s taking, quick and shallow. His eyes dart underneath his eyelids, fingers jerking as he struggles to find comfort trapped between awareness and the bliss of unconsciousness.

One week after his diagnosis he had a panic attack. Not the sort he could hide, as he’d hidden many, but suddenly just the full force of his life hitting him centerfold and buckling his knees from underneath him. Jessica had Jack in the kitchen, the two of them laughing as she made fun of his inability to cook. Jack eagerly agreeing, lacing light accommodations in their mix to make him the butt of their joke. Thoughtful and grounding. He listened to his son try and recount at least one meal he hadn’t ruined by burning it. He’s gotten way better at cooking but for a few months, they survived off of chicken nuggets, macaroni and cheese (that he could never get the shells to soften entirely), and frozen vegetables. Off of the kindness (and off fear) of Dave and Penelope bringing pre-cooked meals over. Things he could keep in the freezer and just stick in the over.

He’d tilted his head back against the wall, laced his fingers through the strands of the carpet, and held on. Tried to breathe in through his nose and out through his mouth. Listened to Jack sticking up for him, “it wasn’t that bad” Jack pouts. And he’d managed a shallow smile, still choking on punched breathes leaving his parted lips. He’s Haley’s son, through and through. The only people who have ever stuck up for him -- even in the face of his awful cooking. Jessica found him on the floor twenty minutes later. Old tears drying on his face and new ones still dripping down from his eyelashes. He told her the truth when she asked what was wrong, took his burden, and brought her down with him. He held her as she cried into his shoulder and then he cried when she asked him to stay, not to leave her. She’s so tired of losing her family and he cracks a smile, thinks an awful little stabbing joke about how he’s the reason she’s lost her family. Haley. Her mother to a heart attack three months after Haley died. Now him, his own body betraying him.

It’s not that bad, he promises but all he can think about is his father. Lung cancer at fifty-three and dead by fifty-four. He’s only fifty but he’s still repeating the story.

We’ll do it together, she assures him but he’s already made sure that’s not an option.

“He’s so cold,” JJ whispers. She’s the only person who can stand to get close enough, who can penetrate the heavy sickness in the room to take his hand. To hold his stiff, cold fingers between her own. She looks over her shoulder, expecting someone to say something but finds them all in the distance. Unable to fully enter the room. Pressed to the walls. Eyes counting the tiles on the floor and making up the ceiling. JJ frowns sadly at them, not surprised but disheartened. She warms his hand between her own, trying to rub warmth back into the cold digits.

Jessica comes into the room, a storm of movement and noise that throws the silent contemplation of the room off. She looks around herself, frowning at the collection of them before rolling her eyes. She knows of the team intimately. For years she’s been listening to Aaron come home and talk about them and she’s grown to know them by means of her own exchanges as Jack gets older. They’re Aaron’s family and Jack’s other aunts and uncles, naturally she’s interested in them. That isn’t to say she isn’t annoyed with them. For the willing ignorance in Aaron’s rapid health decline. In the ways that they chose to appease Aaron rather than help him, can’t they see how much it is to make him happy with their ignorance rather than annoyed with their care?

“Derek,” she’s moving things around the room. They’ll be here for a while. His oxygen saturation is too low and his breathing is causing some mild concern that he might develop aspiration pneumonia. With his temperature still low he might be safe but even then they’re things are not magically better. “Will you please get his heated blanket out of that--” she points to the bag and nods when he goes to the right one. “Thank you.”

She takes control of the room, of the movements they make. Who stays when and who goes where.

He’s sleeping, probably will be for a while.

Around the third week of chemo, he started to understand the doctor’s warnings about fatigue. That, yeah, he might feel okay now and maybe he will continue to feel good for several more weeks but it’s going to catch up, and when it does he needs to be ready to ask for help. His current workload is by no means healthy and hardly sustainable for a healthy person, he’s going to have to make adjustments.

He’d started to feel the fatigue but not creeping in as he’d thought. One Wednesday morning he woke up feeling like he’d gone out drinking the night before. The sort of night Emily’s in charge of, where he wakes up in weird clothes with a haircut Emily gave him in the bathroom. It’s Wednesday, though, and his hair is intact. An awful headache and no amount of sleep were able to bring him to life.

His hours at the office got smaller, falling asleep at the desk and on the couch. He leaned to the explanation that he was just getting older. One sly comment about the grey creeping into his hairline spread unevenly and no longer contained to his temples, and he knew they were using the same safe answer. Making the journey from his office for coffee became a mental battle. He needed twenty minutes to prepare himself. Standing too quickly makes him nauseous. The chemo seemed to make every moment of the day, every complex thought, and all foods cause his stomach to twist threateningly.

Saline dripping above his head, oxygen hissing around his ears, and the warmth of overlapped conversations around him. He feels vacantly removed, left out of a loop that he can’t even tell what’s happening. Prying his eyelids open his hard, resolve weak and body too heavy. Weighed down, rocks tied to his hands. He can feel himself being pulled down through the stretcher. He can’t make his mouth work properly, lips parted in a hoarse groan. “W’as wrong?”

Jessica hears him, sees him waking up. His fingers twitching on the bed and his head lifting up off the pillows, searching for something without opening his eyes. Jessica decides to let someone else handle it, looks over the top of her book, and makes it clear.

Dave moves first, pen sliding into the pages of his book as he sits it down. He squeezes Aaron’s hand, smiling at the groan that leaves his mouth. “Shh, now,” Dave encourages. “It’s alright. It’s nothing, go back to sleep. You’re okay.” His response is another groan, slivers of brown iris’ finding him. “Back to sleep, Aaron.”

Hotch turns his head, “don’.” He pulls his hand back, agitated. He rubs the back of his hand against his nose, “not tired.”

Dave rolls his eyes, Jessica scoffs.

“Aaron,” Jessica, mercifully, leans forward to take the situation into her own hands. “Sleep.”

He groans eyes weighed down, body betraying his rebellion. “Bossy,” he rasps and Jessica just hums. She stands, smirking, and pulls his blanket back up to his neck. He does fall back to sleep, lulled under by the fingers Jessica passes across his hairline. Comforted by how tightly Dave holds his hand.

The medical staff advises and predicts a stay of about a week. They need to closely monitor his breathing for a little longer, prevent another episode from occurring. He spikes a fever and that gets him a few more days, his combative behavior doesn’t help. He’s resistant to the idea that anyone helps him and as his fever spikes it’s hard to comply to his request.

Here Garcia and Reid step back. They’re not… as prepared.

Emily doesn’t even ask when she walks into the bathroom where he’s trying to shower, talking to him about Stephanie from the third floor who was totally hitting on her. He’s shaking by the time the shower’s done, exhausted from lifting his hands up and down and from standing so long. Emily keeps talking, towel drying his hair roughly until he grumbles and then they laugh at the oddness of the situation. His hair is untamable and she gets a kick out of standing the ends up, spiking his hair into a mohawk.

Derek falls into step with him when the nurses come in to remind him of the three daily walks he’s supposed to take up and down the hall. He’s a person to lean into when Hotch starts coughing, an arm around his hips so that he doesn’t fall over. And when they wrap a fall risk bracelet around his hand Derek winces and Dave supplies “yellow isn’t your color”. Some days Derek is met with intense distance and other days they walk close, Derek’s arm already around his back, and talk about nothing, anything.

Dave brings dinner, not that Hotch is eager to eat it, but also popsicles of whatever flavor he could possibly want. He’s partial to Outshine, especially the strawberry ones, and it might not be food but it feels nearly right again to see him eating at least something. It’s a sensitive barrier, a hard line to play with knowing when Hotch just needs a little encouragement and when he just really can’t.

JJ brings movies. Her speed is action movies and Hotch is more into anything but that. So they take turns picking and usually pull punches so that the movie is something they’ll both like but when he’s feeling particularly ill, she’ll pick something awful. Give him an excuse to fall asleep during the movie and she enjoys as much, if not more than he does. An excuse to invade his personal space, cut the lights off, and lay beside him on the bed. She’ll paperwork up there, so relaxed she can zone in and out of what she’s supposed to be doing. He’ll look over her shoulder, reading case reports until he falls asleep or until she shuts the file and tosses it to the side.

These habits, these formations, do not stop when he leaves the hospital. Early. He leaves the hospital, too. Reid comes to visit on Thursday when the others are simply too busy doing other things. Resolve weakened and still shaken, Reid doesn’t last even phase one of Hotch’s plan to bust himself out of the hospital.

Derek is already at Hotch’s house, fighting Jack in the kitchen as they search through the fridge that Garcia’s just packed full of food. She feels ill-equipped to deal with everything, despite having known the longest. She feels guilty. She should have said something long before he got this bad, to the other’s so that they’d know, or to Hotch so at least he could ask her for help.

“Daddy!” Jack jumps up from the floor, running straight to his father before anyone can advise against it but Hotch withstands the collision, beaming down at his son. “I missed you.” Jack wraps his arms around Hotch’s hips, face pressed into his stomach. “Do you wanna help me put my puzzle together?”

They’re livid that he left but they don’t take it out on Reid. Emily won’t speak to either of them but she’s just too mad to hold a conversation. Derek helps him back to his room, Jack hot on their heels. It actually makes Hotch feel worse, being home and still unable to do things the way he wants. They get out of his hair a little more, there isn’t the same guilt associated with his home as the hospital.

It gives him a lot of time to think.

And he finds himself thinking about his father.

No one but Jessica knows the full story of his childhood but they’ve seen him shirtless too many times, know him too well not to have pieced at least most of it together. It’s not his best-kept secret.

He had been the kid that sat in the back of the class. Who never raised his hand, eagerly dancing in his chair, jumping at the chance to prove himself by means of validation from his teachers praising his correct answers. If they were reading aloud, rest assured he’d never have his name spoken by another classmate -- no one ever called his name and giggled in glee at his shocked and annoyed face like they did with one another. He couldn’t be certain they even knew it.

Logged with secrets of his short life, managing only the barest glimpses of life behind his dark eyes, he’d lurched and crawled his way to graduation. No more than a lifeless corpse dragging its reanimated form up and down the halls in its familiar pattern. Showing no signs of spontaneity, neither pain nor joy. Grey and slow.

It hadn’t mattered the silent prayers Hotch sent by way of hushed whispers just under his breath, Haley’s head tucked just under his chin, and the soft wisps of her hair moving with each puff of his breath. No matter how Hotch worked at integrating Jack quickly into as many social situations as possible, he had raised his son to be just a little bit too much like him. There are glimpses of Haley in the things that Jack does. Befriending Paul was leaps out of Hotch’s introverted ways and, more surprisingly, Jack’s.

Jessica’s sage words of frequently repeated wisdom disagree -- “he’s exactly like you, Aaron. The messy hair, that look he makes when he’s doing his homework… that’s all you”.

The little cowlick at the back of Jack’s blonde hair hardly speaks of anything more than Hotch forgetting to run a comb through it in the morning. Perhaps some validity points in favor of his paternity, after all it’s nearly the same cowlick he has. Neither one has tameable hair once it gets longer than an inch. Which does not leave a lot of stylistic options.

“Do you like the dinosaurs with the -- with the spiney -- What are they called?” As carefully as Derek had instructed him to be, Jack sits up by his father’s head. He’d crawled into the bed without invitation, he gets by with a lot these days, and Hotch can’t find it within himself to put those boundaries up between them right now. Jack curls up on his side, head on his father’s chest and a Triceratops staring at Hotch.

It had taken a year for cancer to kill his father and he knows that they’re right, he’s not the same as his father. His father smoked, heavily. Drank frequently and always too much. Didn’t have any friends -- and he finds himself snagged on this difference. Even as Derek throws his son up in the air, hauling Jack over his shoulder and making him shriek with laughter. As Penelope tries new recipe after new recipe of his favorite foods in the hopes that he manages to eat at least one. Not angry, not once, when he picks at the food the others shovel into their mouths. Singing her praises. Emily dragging him around on walks, slowly her pace to accommodate him. She never asks if he needs to stop, just does.

He has friends but sometimes he forgets.

“Daddy,” Jack pulls him back into the conversation. “Can we go to the museum? Uncle Spencer said there are dinosaurs everywhere.”

Hotch nods, “I can ask Uncle Spencer to take you.”

Jack shakes his head, sitting up, “I want you to take me.” He would have never demanded a thing from his father. Never once considered asking for something. Sean was allowed these luxuries, begging to be taken to a game or to the park. Jack pouts, leaning forward and tucking himself up against his father. “We can go Saturday? I’ll take a shower the night before, I promise.”

He’s been hospitalized for four days and Saturday is only two days away, it’s not enough time to recuperate. Not enough time to feel like himself but he can do it. He’ll invite Reid, it’ll provide a great distraction for them both, and that way there’s someone else to focus on. It’s just the museum.

“Okay,” he caves. “On Saturday.”

He’s got a family, people who can trust and who need him just as much as he needs them. He’s going to be okay.

#tw cancer #lie to me #criminal minds #criminal minds fanfiction #aaron hotchner #derek morgan #emily prentiss #david rossi #jennifer jareau #spencer reid #penelope garcia #jessica brooks

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sxypigeon · 3 years

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Shepard is done with everyone's bullshit

Chapter 2 of An Extra Extended Ending

Summary: Because I hated the ending of the third Mass Effect game so much, I made my own with black jack and hookers. FemShep x Liara with damn near every character is the third game making an appearance.

Chapter 1

***

“How long until communications can reach beyond Sol?”

“It’s unclear,” the asari comm technician said hesitantly; the hum of the ship's electronics seemed to grow in the silence. “Quantum communication seems to be unsalvageable. That just leaves the Sol relay, but our latest reports indicate it sustained damage from the firing of the crucible.”

Sparatus sighed heavily and closed his eyes; this was a hollow victory until he knew the fate of Palaven. “Is there anyone working on it now?”

“No, sir. Those reports only came in minutes ago.”

“What about the team working on the crucible?” Tevos asked. “The brightest minds in the galaxy would have the best chance of fixing it – the sooner the better.” The asari councilor paced around a circular display in the middle of the CIC of the Destiny Ascension looking every bit as impatient as her turian colleague.

“They may be able to, but there is another group we would be foolish to ignore,” Valern muttered quietly, staring at the three dimensional screen, watching the number of surviving ships increase slowly as communication was reestablished ship-by-ship.

“What are you . . .” A look of alarm crossed Sparatus’ face. “No,” the turian said stiffly as he pushed himself away from the display.

“Is it really that terrifying of an idea? It’s only a matter of time before the geth come back online. If we act soon, we may be able to keep our alliance with them intact, maybe even strengthen it.” The salarian folded his arms across his chest and eyed Sparatus intently.

He narrowed his eyes. “Or they may turn on us the moment they realize they have nothing more to gain from our alliance. It’s one thing to cooperate when there is no choice, but what would be their incentive now?”

Valern shook his head condescendingly. “The geth are not as shortsighted as you think.” He brought up the pre-fight fleet numbers. “If even a fraction of their troops survived, it would be in their best interest to repair the relays,” he stated firmly, pointing at the image. “They value knowledge above all else and what better source is there than the relays?”

“This isn’t the first time we’ve come in contact with an AI species. There is too much at risk,” Tevos said quietly from across the room. “If we act quickly-”

“We’ll what? Destroy all of the units in Sol?” Valern shouted over the asari councilor. “How many more do you think are out there? We’d be risking another war - one we are ill prepared for.”

“And you want to send them to work on the relay?! What happens when they acquire the knowledge they seek? What’s to stop them from using it against the rest of the galaxy?” Sparatus marched back to the display and brought up images of the Citadel attack nearly four years earlier. “This is what will happen. They have no use for organics. They made that abundantly clear!”

The salarian councilor shook his head in frustration. “We know how persuasive the Reapers can be and yet even after being attacked by the quarians and being on the verge of annihilating them, they agreed to a truce. These are not simple machines, Sparatus!”

“Why are you so convinced?” Tevos asked suspiciously. She walked slowly around the display toward him. “You were vocally against curing the genophage, why is this different?” She fixed on him with a penetrating stare. “What aren’t you telling us?”

Valern scoffed at the accusation. “I see I’m alone in my conviction. What more can I say to either of you?” With a last impatient glare at his colleagues, the salarian turned and strode from the room. “If not as an act of the Council, then as an act of the salarian people, the geth will be brought back online!” he called back as the door closed behind him.

A tense silence followed Valern and lingered long after he left. “Do we even know if any of the science team is still in Sol?” Sparatus asked quietly while bracing himself on the terminal in front of him.

“No, but we will know soon enough,” she said before sending out the call for help.

***

Spirits, it’s a miracle she survived, the head nurse thought as he wheeled the patient out of surgery. At least it’s a bit of good news . . . Sure could use a bit more, though.

A sea of medics split to allow the turian and human through the bustling ward. Endless lines of beds on either side of the walkway were filled with too many injured, too many that would not last the next twenty-four hours. That’s not- No, I can’t think like that. There’s too much to do to focus on something so trivial. You’re in charge of this ward, damn it! You have lives to save. . .

He squeezed the gurney between two others and began setting up IVs and monitoring equipment. I need to make my rounds soon. We should be getting another shipment of refugees from the Citadel soon- He froze and stared at the patient. She’s not supposed to be waking up yet! “Ma’am, can you hear me?” he asked, staring down at her.

The woman drowsily blinked for a moment before lifting her eyes and focusing on the turian . . . and letting out a sudden, terrified scream. “AHHHH!!!”

Damn it, not again. “Ma’am, it’s okay. You’re aboard the Destiny Ascension.” Another blood-curdling scream. “Ma’am, you’re safe! You were injured-”

“Hey! That’s enough!” Both quickly looked over to the next bed and saw the occupant giving them a stern glare. “I know turians are ugly, but you’re going to make the guy self-conscious if you keep up the screaming.”

The woman stared, gaping at the other patient, long enough for the nurse to inject a sedative into her IV. “There you go, ma’am. Just relax.” They watched tensely as the woman quickly sank bonelessly back into her pillow. Finally. I’m not going to live this down any time soon, he thought as other orderlies snickered as they passed.

“So, who do I need to talk to to get out of here?” the other patient asked after a moment.

“Myself,” he said as he finished setting up the sleeping woman’s monitoring equipment. “Is there somewhere you need to be?”

“I figured you could use another empty bed.”

“What I need is for my patients to recover sufficiently, regardless of how much they think otherwise.” He walked over to the patient and looked at her chart. Human female, numerous serious burns, deep puncture wound to the right side, three fractured ribs – well this just goes on and on. “How are you feeling, ma’am?”

“Fantastic,” she said dryly inspecting the bandages on her hands and arms. “The pain meds wore off a while ago – No! No, I’m not asking for more.”

“If you need them-”

The patient shook her head. “I’m okay. I just,” she paused for a moment and chose her words carefully, “I need to be doing something. I can’t just lay here and – and think. Just give me a once over before you make me stay . . . please.”

He recognized the quiet desperation in her voice and the pleading in her eyes. “Fine.” With a healthy amount of skepticism, the turian gently unwrapped the bandages on her left arm. That can’t be right- He checked the chart again. How the hell? Humans aren’t supposed to heal this quickly. This is more in line with a krogan . . . maybe even faster.

“It’s not pretty, but it’s still better than it was before,” she said quietly, examining the slightly inflamed skin.

“Remarkable is what it is.” He unbandaged the other arm and stared in numb disbelief. “There has to be some sort of mistake in your chart-”

“I think you’ll find my side is sufficiently healed as well.”

The nurse met her piercing stare before pulling back the blanket and lifting her hospital gown. Spirits . . . this is incredible, he thought after removing the gauze. “How is this possible? Even if you spent the last six hours in a vat of medi-gel, you wouldn’t be able to heal this quickly.”

“I’m not exactly a normal human.” The ward around them moved on, unaware of the medical anomaly the head nurse was observing. “So what do you think?” she asked hesitantly.

I think the galaxy needs to study you, but . . . you don’t belong in the ICU. “I can see no justification for keeping you here, but we’re going to need to get you fed and cleaned up before you can go anywhere.” He noted the change in her status in her chart, shaking his head in disbelief as he did. “I’ll send someone over with a meal.”

“Thank you.”

He turned to leave but stopped, hesitating a moment. “Ma’am . . . everything you’ve done – everyone you’ve saved . . . there aren’t words strong enough to convey the gratitude we – I feel toward you. Thank you, Commander.”

The soldier nodded numbly, not meeting his eyes.

But it never feels like enough, he thought sadly. Stay strong, Shepard. I fear we may need you now more than ever.

***

“-he’s going-”

“No, it’s-”

“Where-”

A sharp radiating pain drilled between the exhausted asari’s eyes as distant voices became clear. “It all looks fine, no permanent damage. You are cleared for duty.”

Dr. Chakwas, the med bay. . . the crash. . . Shepard. . .

“Liara? Can you hear me?”

With an enormous effort, she opened her eyes. “Yes,” she rasped out. Her throat was so dry.

“How are you feeling?”

“Not at all well.” She rolled onto her side trying to lessen the pain.

“This should help.”

Something wonderful flowed through her veins, dulling the agony. “Where are we?” she asked tentatively.

“Armstrong nebula, but beyond that no one is sure. They say the planet is habitable though, with a breathable atmosphere and a comfortable gravity.” She helped Liara sit up and handed her a bottle of water. “Finish this and then get some rest.”

She gulped it down gratefully as worry began to sink in. “Do you know what happened to us?”

“Not really,” the doctor admitted. “Whatever that energy field was, it left no physical trace other than several cases of acute epistaxis – nosebleed.” She handed Liara another bottle of water. “Your case was a bit worse, likely due to trying to help the engineers restart the core for over an hour with your biotics.”

Liara sighed tiredly, staring at the bottle, “Not that it did any good. Have we been able to reach anyone back in Sol?”

“I’m afraid not. Specialist Traynor thinks the quantum communication network is beyond repair. We will have to rely on the relays and hope someone is out there to hear us.” The doctor let her cheery façade slip for a moment, long enough to hint at the extent of the worry she was trying to hide. It slid back into place as Chakwas laid a hand on Liara’s shoulder. “Get some rest, I’ll wake you if anything changes.”

But will it ever? she thought as she stared up at the ceiling, feeling the numbing darkness pull her back under.

***

“This has got to be the most confusing hell-hole I’ve ever been to.”

“What’s so confusing about it, Mr. Vega?” Steve Cortez asked as he finished his lukewarm MRE.

“It’s not the layout or anything like that – it’s the people.” Vega pushed himself gingerly off the cot on the floor of a mostly intact office building and pulled the bottle of water from the shuttle pilot’s hands. “Thanks, Estaban. It’s like no one can tell what they’re supposed to be feeling,” he muttered, flexing his injured leg.

Cortez took back his water and scanned the area. Roughly five miles from where the beam had been in central London, a small outpost had been hastily established to tend to the injured. Understaffed and undersupplied, it was not a place of miraculous medical operations, but a last-ditch effort to save as many survivors as possible – including James Vega. “After months of hopelessness, there is plenty to be thankful for . . . and just as much to mourn for.”

“It just feels – shit, I don’t know. Maybe it’s all of that blood I lost on the trek over here, but this just feels wrong. Javik, what’s your read on the situation?”

The prothean did not move from his meditative stance across the room. “Your species celebrates prematurely and mourns before the heaviest of losses are counted.” He paused for a moment before bowing his head slightly, “But even with these flaws, it is your cycle that stopped the Reapers – whether for good or just temporarily. That is more than what can be said of my cycle.”

“Yeah, that sounds about right,” Vega said tiredly. “Do you think – what set off the crucible?”

A sad smile pulled at Cortez’s lips, “Until I hear otherwise, I’m going to believe Shepard did.”

“I’m okay with that,” the lieutenant said as he laid back down. He was out within minutes.

“How is the human krogan?” Javik asked without moving.

Cortez rubbed his face roughly as he tried to shake the melancholy brought on by the thought of Shepard. “The medics think he’ll make it.”

“Good, our efforts dragging him here were not in vain,” the prothean said sternly. “Do not lose your determination – the fight may be over, but your people will need you and Vega.”

“That goes for you too, Javik. You��re one of us now. We aren’t about to forget what you’ve done to help us.”

Javik bowed his head in acknowledgement, but remained silent.

We’re going to need everyone, Cortez thought as he stared around the room at the other cots filled with injured soldiers. I just hope there’s enough of a galaxy left worth rebuilding.

***

“So what you’re saying is we’re screwed.”

“Not entirely,” Tali said hesitantly as Garrus and Williams stared up at the motionless mass effect core in despair. “What we’re saying is that it will take a while, a few weeks at least.”

“Assuming it’s fixable at all,” Williams said skeptically.

“I’m not saying it will be easy, Commander,” Adams said calmly, “but I think we’ll be able to get it up and running again.”

“That’s better than nothing,” Garrus offered.

Williams took a breath and nodded. “Okay, I’ll inform the crew,” she said before heading to the elevator.

“How is she doing?” Daniels asked as they all stared back at the core.

“She’s managing,” Garrus said quietly. “She still doesn’t know if she can fill the void Shepard left, but she knows she has to.”

“No one can replace Shepard, but that wasn’t ever the plan was it?” Tali asked.

“No, but it’s going to feel that way for a while – at least until we get a rhythm going,” Donnelly said. “Any luck with EDI?”

“Not yet.” Garrus headed toward the elevator. “I’ll let you know if we make contact with anyone. Let us know if there’s anything we can do topside.”

***

“Watch the right flank!” Grunt roared over the gunfire. He and his men were deep in the wards flushing out and dispatching Cerberus troops. “Take out that engineer!”

It was slow, grueling work. Street by street, building by building, the enemy was steadily falling back. They’d even managed to save a few civilians. It wasn’t their primary goal, but it did give him a sense of pride knowing he prevented someone’s death by causing another’s.

“Move up!” They were meeting fewer and fewer troops until recently, not that it bothered him. What worried him was the number of engineers they’d come across in this neighborhood. Something was brewing.

“Keep an eye out for explosives and turrets,” he growled as the last enemy fell. “Something doesn’t feel right.”

The squad moved carefully from the courtyard to the building interior. No resistance, no one at all. What are we missing? Cowards, where are you hiding?

“Let’s get out of here,” he ordered before they’d finished securing the building. “Double-time it!” This smells like a trap.

“What was that?!” one of his men yelled as the building shook violently.

Shooting out a window, Grunt bellowed, “Get out of the building NOW!” His men leaped from the window three stories up. The krogan commander followed and landed hard on the walkway below just as the building collapsed. “Those damn cowards,” he growled. “They’ll have to do better than that!”

***

I can’t wait to get off of this fucking ship. At least the food is decent – I am beyond sick of MREs. Jack checked her omni-tool for the fourth time in five minutes. What the hell is taking so long?

After arriving with an unconscious Shepard, she watched uneasily as her friend was wheeled away to surgery. The next hour was a blur of confusion, exhaustion, and anxiety. At some point she’d managed to sleep for a few hours. Now she was an irritable and short tempered ball of energy, desperate to get back to Earth and her kids.

“Keep that up and people will think you’re unbalanced,” a soft voice said behind her.

“Fuck you,” Jack said with a hint of relief. “I can’t believe they let you out. I mean – you still look like shit.”

“Thank you, Jack. You always know how to cheer me up.” Shepard sat next to the biotic with her protein bar and electrolyte drink. “What’s going on?”

“Who the fuck knows?” She stared at the table in front of her. “No communication outside of the system, Grunt is still securing the Citadel, still no word on my kids or the Normandy.”

“Earth?”

“Bits and pieces. Nothing yet on your boys in London.” She watched Shepard eat mechanically, stoic to the lack of information.

“I have to meet with the council and then after that, hopefully we can catch a shuttle back to London.”

“When’s the meeting?”

“Whenever I feel like it.”

About damn time you started telling those spineless fuckers where they can shove it. She stared at the softly glowing scars on her face and neck. Someone hasn’t been thinking happy thoughts. “So are we going to dick around here for a while to piss them off?”

She shook her head after she finished the last of the meal. “There are a few things I need to say before they start another victory tour. I’m going to need you there to keep me in check.”

A small snort of laughter escaped Jack, “You’re shitting me, right?”

Shepard stood and gave her a tight smile. “Let’s just say I’m a little short on patience at the moment.”

“Well, shit. I might have to film this.” She followed the commander with a sinister grin. “Let’s go make some councilors cry.”

***

“I don’t know what else there is to try,” Traynor said tiredly. “My expertise is on a smaller scale. I don’t know how to fix a comm problem on a galactic scale!”

Williams leaned on the terminal that had been Shepard’s in the CIC. “A galactic scale? What does that mean?”

The comms specialist ran her hands through her hair. “There are a couple of possibilities. First, we are the only survivors and that is why we haven’t reached anyone-”

“Let’s not go with that possibility.”

“Okay. Second, something is actively blocking our communications – natural or otherwise.”

“Reapers blocking communication,” the lieutenant commander said stoically.

“Or third, the mass relays are not functioning properly, due to damage or complete destruction.”

“From the crucible firing.” The CIC was silent as Williams contemplated the scenarios. “And none of these can be fixed while we’re stuck here.”

“No, ma’am.”

What are we supposed to do? What am I supposed to do?! Damn you, Shepard. It should be you here not me. “Let’s focus on the small scale then. What can we do to get the Normandy space worthy again?”

Traynor stared at the nonfunctional galaxy map as she bit her lip. “There are still several systems that haven’t come online that should have by now. There’s the exterior damage and then there’s EDI.”

“What’s the status of EDI?”

“Completely unresponsive.”

“Shit,” Williams muttered. “Do we have any idea how to get her back up?”

Traynor was silent for a moment. “I have a few ideas, but I’m not sure if they’d do any good. When Dr. T’Soni feels up to it, I’d like to get her input.”

“She was still passed out in the med bay last I checked.” She closed her eyes and let out a long breath. “Do what you can to bring up the other systems – keep me updated.”

***

“How are you holding up?”

Joker looked away from the foliage surrounding the cockpit and saw Garrus approaching. “Great,” he said sarcastically. “Crashed the ship, cracked four ribs, and my girlfriend might be dead. How about you?”

“I’m alive, that’s more than I expected to be honest.” He dropped into the seat next to the pilot. “In large part thanks to you.”

The pilot looked away. “Yeah don’t get too gushy yet. We may have to start calling this place home even if we can get the Normandy off the ground.”

“If that’s the case,” Williams said as she approached, “then I think our first priority should be finding something growing out there that can be distilled before we run out of liquor.”

“Good to know we’re on the same page,” Garrus chuckled. “I don’t suppose we know if what’s growing out there is levo- or dextro-amino based.”

“If we distill it enough it shouldn’t matter,” Joker said, staring back out at the jungle. “No protein in pure ethanol.”

Williams shared a concerned look with Garrus before speaking behind the pilot’s chair. “I’ve been talking to Traynor – she has some ideas on how to bring EDI back. Once Liara is up and about she and Traynor can start working on her.”

Joker continued staring out of the window as if he didn’t hear her. “Okay,” he finally said quietly.

***

Finally, Tevos thought as Shepard stepped through the open door. She looks much better, but are her scars glowing? “Shepard, we were beginning to worry. Who is your companion?”

The Spectre stood at parade rest in front of the asari while her comrade remained near the door. “Jack, this is the council. Councilors Tevos and Sparatus, meet Jack – a teacher at Grissom Academy. She’s here to . . . keep an eye on me while I’m recovering.”

A snort of laughter escaped the other human as she folded her arms across her chest. Shepard always did keep strange company.

“May I inquire where the salarian councilor is?” Shepard asked soberly.

“Valern has decided he would be more comfortable aboard a salarian ship,” Sparatus said stiffly. “That is part of why we needed to speak with you.”

Tevos activated the display at the center of the room showing an image of the Sol relay, it’s rings fractured and stationary. “It would seem the relays were damaged when the crucible fired. We have many of the crucible scientists working to repair it, but there’s been discussion about whether other groups should be recruited to help.”

“Why would we not ask everyone to fix it?” Shepard asked with a slight edge to her voice.

“This is the most advanced technology in the galaxy,” the turian said briskly. “In the wrong hands, this knowledge could endanger all of us.”

“So who hasn’t been invited to the party, the salarians?”

“No, the geth.”

Shepard frowned as she mauled over the information. “The geth are still alive?”

“They were never alive to begin with, Shepard. At the moment all units are offline,” Sparatus said, staring at the display. “Valern thinks they can be activated and recruited to help with repairs.”

Shepard fought to keep her face neutral. “Why not ask for their help? From where I’m standing, it looks like we could use all the help we can get. Don’t forget the rachni, they’ve also been proven to be very capable and intelligent.”

How does she not see the risks associated with her ideas? “Are you listening to a word you’re saying, Shepard? With the galaxy weakened as it is, it would take very little to change the balance of power and throw us all into another war.” Tevos turned and began to pace. “Caution is needed now more than ever,” she said as she stopped in front of the Spectre.

Shepard closed her eyes and let out a slow breath – her scars seeming to brighten as she did. “Are you suggesting we sever the alliances that we – no, what am I saying? – that I forged to win this war-”

“There’s a difference between having an alliance and handing out loaded weapons that could be pointed back at us,” Sparatus interrupted.

Despite remaining still, the marine radiated anger, enough to make the armed guards perk up. “If you intend on backstabbing your allies, then yes you will have something to worry about.”

“Commander, your vision of the galaxy is naïve,” Tevos stated impatiently. “You of all people should know what the risks associated with-”

Shepard barked out a laugh, breaking her immobile stance. She shook her head in exasperation. “I’m sorry, Councilor, but I can’t buy into the idea that I’m the naïve one. How long do you think it will take for the galaxy to find out your people have been hiding the best preserved prothean beacon in existence? Do you honestly think you will be able to remain the superior race? If it’s any comfort, I don’t think you will have to worry about the rest of the galaxy, I think your own people will be the ones to tear down your species. How many thousands of years have the asari been lied to, Councilor? Was that a risk worth taking?”

Tevos clenched her jaw as she fought her own anger. “And do you honestly think the galaxy will be better off without our guidance? Will the geth lead the way to the future or will it be the humans?” she asked acidly.

“I’d like to see what the galaxy can do together,” she said evenly. “But we can’t do that if we start severing alliances without just cause.”

Sparatus leaned over the galaxy map. “Shepard, what you’re saying is inspiring, but you can’t protect the galaxy with idealism,” he said standing beside Tevos. “The asari government will have to answer for their crimes, but what the galaxy needs now is stability . . . and someone they can stand behind-”

“You’ve got to be kidding me.” Shepard spat. Behind her, Jack was muttering loudly about spineless politicians. ��I’m not about to smile and assure the galaxy everything is fine,” she explained as she also leaned over the map, “while you screw them over when they’re not looking.” Shepard glared at Sparatus. “If that’s what’s expected of me as a Spectre then you’ll have to accept my resignation.”

“This isn’t a matter of right or wrong, Shepard!” he said with fire in his eyes. “This is about saving our galaxy and preventing a complete collapse of the community!”

Shepard took a step back and shook her head again. “A little honesty and accountability could go a long way, Councilor. We are all vulnerable, but we have an opportunity to make all of us stronger than we were before this war!” Shepard turned back to Tevos, “The galaxy will stand behind me regardless of if you want them to or not. The question is whether you’ll be standing with us or on your own.”

The drone of the ventilation system filled the room as Shepard turned and headed to the door. “How many billions died because of the decisions you’ve made?” she asked as she paused at the door. “Do you have any idea what it’s like to-” She turned to face them. “You had four years to prepare, but none of you did a damn thing. But this guilt doesn’t just belong to either of you, though. It’s just as much mine for not doing more, for not – for not-”

“Shepard, let’s go,” Jack said quietly.

“For the sake of the galaxy, I do hope there will be a change in the balance of power.” She followed Jack out of the room without a second glance.

“That went well,” the turian muttered tiredly. “If there’s nothing else, I too would like to be with my people.” He left without waiting for a reply.

The asari councilor remained unmoving long after they left, contemplating Shepard’s words and the fate of her race. Things will never be the same again . . .

***

“They have hundreds of civilians in the buildings ahead,” the krogan scout reported to Grunt.

The commander and his men were camped out in a maintenance tunnel roughly fifteen blocks away from the Cerberus stronghold. “What defenses will we face?”

“Portable barriers and too many turrets to count. A direct approach will be nearly impossible.”

Grunt narrowed his eyes and contemplated his next move. “It looks like we’ll be needing stealth then.” Several of his men shook their heads and growled impatiently. “Complain all you want, but I can promise you we’ll kill more of them this way. These tunnels run right under them. They’ll be dead before they know we’re there. Pack it up and move out!”

The tunnels, unfortunately, were never meant to fit a krogan. Crawling on their bellies single file, the soldiers pushed the lifeless bodies of keepers from their path. The tight space was making his men agitated, something Grunt struggled with just as much. Damn those Cerberus cowards. . .

As they progressed further, voices could be heard above them. “Get those turrets up now! We’ve lost sight of the Krogans and spotted a turian cruiser near the shopping center. Where are those mechs?!”

I’m going to enjoy this. Soon voices multiplied and words became blurred – the sound of dozens of footsteps echoed down the tunnel. We must be getting close. . .

The scout signaled and the squad branched off down the numerous side passages and waited. Time to finish this.

With an angry roar the krogans sprang from the tunnels. Cerberus troops too stunned to move were quickly cut down. “No more hiding!” Grunt followed after those fleeing from the chaos.

Thick clouds of smoke flooded the building he entered, blinding him. I can still hear you, still smell your fear. Staying low, he let out an angry growl and sprinted through the fog into the nearest shooting enemy, crushing him against the wall behind him. “Who’s next?!”

As he cleared the lobby of the building more gunfire was heard outside. Those aren’t my men . . .

Turians, and lots of them, were flooding the walkways, pushing Cerberus forces back faster. Grunt growled in annoyance as he moved to the next floor. Bastards are going to have this fight finished before it gets good!

***

“That is out of the question.”

“But, Dr. Chakwas-”

“Absolutely not.”

Traynor and Liara sighed in defeat under the doctor’s stern gaze. “Can we at least inspect Glyph to see if he can be brought online?” Liara asked impatiently.

“Only if you plan on doing it here in the med bay so I can keep an eye on you,” she said shortly. “I am completely serious about not using your biotics. Twenty-four hours and not a minute less.”

“Okay then,” Traynor said hesitantly, “we can at least brainstorm about what that energy wave was.”

Chakwas shook her head tiredly, “All of the symptoms were very mild and nearly identical: loss of consciousness, headaches, and nosebleeds.”

“All electronics were rendered useless, but chemical and biological systems remained mostly unaffected,” Liara muttered thinking of the glow stick Donnelly lit in engineering before the crash landing.

“It would have to have been something mostly inert to have passed through the entire ship, but leave little damage,” the comms specialist said thoughtfully as she pulled up a chair opposite Chakwas and T’Soni.

“But everything affected by it seems to be salvageable,” Chakwas said as she examined the crew’s medical logs since the crash.

“If it is inert, then there would have to have been a lot of it.” Liara shared a look with Traynor. “You’re thinking about a wave of dark matter, aren’t you? Like a dark matter EMP?”

“Neutrinos to be specific. Dark matter alone can account for ninety-five percent of a system’s mass. Neutrinos are only formed when something expending a lot of energy happens like a supernova or a nuclear reaction-”

“Or a relay firing?”

“It would seem like a logical jump,” Traynor said with some hesitation. “It’s been observed in very low levels after a ship has used a relay.”

“So, if that’s what it was then how did it drain nearly everything of potential energy?” Liara asked, letting her head fall into her hands.

“Liara?”

“I’m fine, it’s just a headache.”

“We’re stepping well past my area of expertise.”

The bay was silent for a moment as the women thought. “I do have one rather unsettling question,” Chakwas said calmly as she put down her notes. “If we can restore function to our omni-tools and maybe even EDI, could the Reapers also be restored – assuming of course that they were affected at all? Are they simply in a state of inactivation?”

The room fell silent.

“That would also be a logical leap,” Traynor said quietly.

***

Jack glared as their shuttle veered away from their intended destination. “Shepard, this doesn’t look like Earth.”

“No, it does not. Apparently we’re having a layover at the dreadnought up ahead.” Shepard felt a chill run down her spine as the small shuttle entered the cavernous hanger. I don’t think we’ll be leaving any time soon.

“That’s one hell of a welcoming party,” Jack muttered, eying the scores of armed soldiers assembling at the landing zone. “This normal procedure or are we just special?”

“We are special,” she sighed. The shuttle door opened with a hiss as Shepard exited. Immediately the soldiers came to attention and held a salute. I am not ready to be back to this.

A lone soldier marched briskly through the ranks of the others and stopped in front of Shepard with a crisp salute. “Welcome aboard, Staff Commander Shepard.”

“Thank you, Lieutenant.” Shepard tried not to think about how much she didn’t want to be there as she returned the salute. “I asked to be taken back down to Earth. I’m a bit confused why I’m here.”

“If you’ll follow me, ma’am, Admiral Ahern will be able to answer all of your questions.”

Shepard came to a sudden stop. “Wait, wait, wait. Are you referring to Admiral Tadius Ahern of Pinnacle Station?”

“Yes, ma’am, I believe that was his previous assignment,” he said stoically as he turned and led them across the hanger.

“You want to fill me in on who this guy is?” Jack asked quietly as they neared the elevator.

“I may have . . . won the admiral’s apartment on Intai’sei in a bet a few years back.”

Jack shook her head a few times before finally saying, “Queen of the fucking girl scouts . . . Have you even set foot in the place?”

“Once,” she admitted as they entered the spacious lift. “I was a bit preoccupied with stopping a rogue spectre and his army of geth from wiping out the galaxy.” Shepard found herself syncing back up with the strict protocols usually practiced on larger ships, a long way from the casual atmosphere of the Normandy. What I wouldn’t give to be back there. . .

“Commander Shepard, it’s been a while,” the gruff admiral said as the group entered the combat information center.

“Yes it has, sir,” she said, saluting. “I see you still haven’t retired.”

“Can’t do that without a retirement home, now can I?” Ahern waited for his men to disembark before continuing. “This your protégé?”

Jack frowned, looking mildly insulted. “Hell, no.”

“She’s a friend,” Shepard said with a grin. “I don’t mean to sound rude, Ahern, but why the hell am I here?”

The older man chuckled and motioned them to follow him. “With Admiral Hackett beyond Sol and Admiral Anderson deceased – a great man, the galaxy is a worse place without him – I am the highest ranking officer. It’s my job to make the big decisions.”

Shepard nodded silently, her throat suddenly unbearably tight.

“I’ve been contacted by the salarian councilor,” he continued. “It seems he wants our help with a project.”

“I’m guessing it has to do with the geth,” Jack said dryly.

“That it does. Not long after the crucible fired and we restarted the systems on the ship, we began sending ships out to retrieve as many alliance fighters as we could before the poor bastards suffocated. Some of our ships also brought back geth fighters. I’m thinking we must have over a hundred of them in the hangar wherever we could find room.”

“Are any of them online?” Shepard asked. They came to a platform overlooking the entire CIC as well as one hell of a view of Earth from the enormous widows ahead of them.

“They weren’t initially,” he said leaning on the railing. “I had some of our techs try to jump start them, but it’s a slow process. We are able to bring up basic processes, though.” He paused, rubbing the stubble on his jaw. “The problem is what happens if we can’t bring them back online completely. And now I’ve got the salarians breathing down my neck demanding access to them, but I’m not entirely sure if their interest in them is honorable.”

Shepard stared out the windows at Earth, feeling a wave of grief washing over her. “You want to help them, but don’t trust the salarians.”

“Organic or not, they came to our aid. Hell, I’m thinking of commissioning a memorial for them in London,” he said wearily with a bit of humor.

“And that’s why I always liked you, sir.”

“That’s touching, but I was hoping for a bit more feedback than that.”

She closed her eyes and took a long breath before answering. “What I know is that the turians and asari would rather leave the geth as they are.” Shepard shook her head sadly. “I haven’t spoken with the salarian councilor since shortly after firing the crucible, but I think you have good reason to hesitate.”

“I should have kicked his ass while I had the chance,” Jack muttered. “The prick wouldn’t stop going on about how saving Shepard’s life was a waste of time.”

“What stopped you?” Ahern asked, grinning.

“I was too busy fixing his and everyone else’s fucking omni-tools.”

“Shame. So what is your official recommendation, Commander?”

“For now,” she said after a moment, “allow them hands-off access. Be open to consultations, but have your men continue to take the lead on this. I’ve never known Councilor Valern to offer assistance out of the kindness of his heart.”

“That is as good of a plan as any.” He signaled one of his men to meet them. “Lieutenant Riley will show you to the armory and also get you fitted for a set of armor. There’s no telling what the situation down there is like with most of the comms down. It was good seeing you, Shepard, and meeting your protégé. Stay safe.”

Jack flipped him off before following Shepard.

***

Notes: Thanks for reading! I planned on adding more, but I forgot this existed for a few years and then lost the second half of this chapter. I'll see if I can track it down. :P

#mass effect #commander shepard #femshep x liara #liara t'soni #femshep

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seventeensarmy · 4 years

Text

(3) Stuck With You (OT7!HybridAu)

Pairing: OT7xReader, Jungkook x Reader, soon Jimin x Reader x Jungkook; rest will come in the course of the story

Warnings: a tiny bit angst, fluff, toxic relationship to food, abuse (Like one slapp), flashbacks of JK´s past, tell me if I missed something

Words: 4.204

Summary: Jungkook´s shopping trip brought something home that wasn´t on the shopping list

A/N: I planned to upload this earlier, but TikTok came in the way, sorry

Previous / Next

Chapter three

“ You're older than me? But you are soo small ”

Taglist: @imezz @anxietylovesme @holaaaf @ot7purple @calling-dips-on-j-hope @greezenini @givebuckysomelove

(not my gif)

One year ago (Reader 20/ JK 20/ JM 22) "Kookie, can you buy me some of that matcha detox powder?", you asked your boyfriend who was about to leave to go groceries shopping. You sat on your knees on the couch, hopping to appear bigger so he would see you. Jungkook groaned and looked at you, "What do you need that for?" You looked passed him, thinking of your next words. It was powder to help you lose weight, with Jungkook forcing you to have at least to meals and one snack a day you felt like you gained weight. Weight that would have made your mum make you go on an ice cube diet for weeks. So you felt like your solution to lose weight should be taken better by the bunny than what you could have done instead. Jungkook wasn't stupid, he knew what you would use detox matcha powder for, but he wanted to see if you would lie to him. He started to inform himself about diets and work out methods as soon as he could, he wanted to better understand what you doing to yourself and he himself wanted to work on his body. He was trying really hard to get you to understand, that your way of viewing food, weight and your body was a toxic view that your parents taught you. And while you knew, that your parents weren't the best, you found it hard to let go of the way that things have been. "Baby, look at me. What do you want that for?" Jungkooks voice was gently, but firm enough for you to understand, that he wouldn't ask again. You looked at him and bit your lip, "Well first of all, it's really good for your body, it gets rid of all the bad stuff in your body.", you started and Jungkook scoffed, doubting that there would be too much 'bad stuff' in your body, seeing as you were living strictly plant based. Claiming you couldn't eat animals, when your boyfriend was last animal and you didn't want to hurt anyone. Jungkook had cooed when you told him that, thinking how cute his little dancer was, though that didn't stop him from sometimes enjoying a nice steak or fried chicken (not too often though, because he also had a strict diet, due to his rabbit parts). But not only did you live plant based, you also never ate any junk food and sweets. So what bad toxins were you keeping in your body that you needed to get rid of? "Is that all Baby girl? Just having a little detox?" You wanted to scream, you didn't want to lie to him, he would be able to tell right away, you knew that he knew, but you didn't want to see his disappointed face. You sighed defeated, "It also helps with weight loss" You didn’t know what to expect, would he yell? No, Jungkook never raised his voice at you, but he didn’t need to. He could voice his disappointment just fine with a calm voice. "y/n. We talked about this." Jungkook let out a tired sigh. You felt bad, biting your lip, you knew he worried about you, but you didn't really see any other solutions. Your mothers’ words burned too deep in your head. "I know Kookie, but, the competition is just a week away and Ive been eating a lot recently" you tried to tell him, stuttering. You hadn't noticed that he had moved from the door to the couch and was now kneeling in front of you. Jungkook furrowed his brows, what should he do. He saw your slouched position and how you were avoiding his gaze, he knew you were wary if his reaction, because now it was his move, you told him what he wanted to hear. "Okay" Jungkook breathed out, having decided on plan. "I'll buy it. But I'll keep it and you only get to take some after you ask me. Got it? And no other tricks." He was stern, but he figured, that this way he could help you easier. He just needed to slowly show you, that there was no need for such radical diets. He saw a documentary on eating disorders and while he was no expert, Jungkook realised that people suffering from it, often didn't even realise it or don't see it as abnormal behaviour. So he tried to reteach you, trying to destroy the ideas of beauty your mother gave you. Helping with and controlling your diet plan was a new strategy, but he was sure, it only could be better than the last. Over the years Jungkook had tried again and again to make you see your toxic behaviour towards food, sadly it often ended in arguments. Leaving you crying and Jungkook frustrated. You knew Jungkook didn't like how or what you ate and you saw the disappointment every time you turned down a new dish, because you didn't know how many calories it had. Your eyes met his and though you were happy, this win for you came with a lot of guilt and you almost told Jungkook he shouldn't buy the powder, then your mother’s voice reminded you, "It's important to look pretty, the judges will like that. So even if you can't dance, you can at least be pleasing to the eye" Jungkooks hand came to cup your face, "I love you, you know that right? And I only want you to be happy and healthy" you were looking into his eyes, nodding. Jungkook wanted to say more, telling you that he knew that being happy and healthy was lying in two different directions right now, but he knew that this would upset you, so he kept quiet. "I love you too Kookie, I know you want me to be happy and I'm happy whenever I'm with you" you smiled, turning your head to kiss the palm of the hand; that was cupping your face. Jungkook pulled you down for a real kiss before standing up and grabbing the shopping bag again. "I'll be back in like an hour or so okay? Be good, love you" Jungkook yelled and left the house. You knew what he meant when he asked you to be good, don't train. You already practiced for hours today, so he would expect you to rest for the remaining day. And you found yourself listening to him, being actually exhausted from dancing all morning. You grabbed a book from the study your dad used to work in; you changed it into a reading room purely. There were beanbags and a bunch of pillows and two large shelves full of books. Since the weather was nice you decided to read in the garden, sitting down on the Hollywood swing in the back of the garden. Jungkook was walking to the supermarket. It wasn't unusual that he was the one going out for groceries; you were often too tired after your training to do anything. The bunny was sure that part that was due to you not eating enough, he noticed how after a tough day you would shakily sit down and sip your water. He hated how he felt like he couldn't help you. He walked past your elementary school; he remembered how he would always wait for you in your garden. Sometimes you brought your homework with you and explained what you had to do to him. He couldn't always follow the explanation of an eleven year old, but he was thankful for trying. Nowadays he had also started to study with you. Jungkook couldn't do the maths that you could, but he wasn't too worried about that, he saw that school didn't always teach you what you needed to know for life. Best example was biology, why would you, a dancer, need to know about photosynthesis? He didn't understand why they would teach that, they should have teaches you that eating is fu*king important. He crossed the streets, Busan was pretty, he thought. You would be soon, after finishing school in six months, there was nothing keeping you here. Both of you had a lot of bad memories here. You, from your family. Jungkook from his days on the street, he can't really remember if there was a time before he was on the street. He never met his parents, or at least he can't remember them. He also can't remember ever having an owner before meeting you, he just knew the streets and it wasn't easy. The nights were often freezing, he remembers breaking into a shed one night, because rain was pouring down and the bridge he sometimes slept under was flooded. The next morning he was woken up by a screaming woman, who then quickly proceeded to kick him out, yelling something about calling the cops. After he met you, life became easier, but not completely. In the beginning he still didn't have a place to sleep, it had taken you some time till you realised, that he needed some place to sleep. Jungkook wasn't mad that you sometimes kept forgetting to unlock the shed in the back of your garden; you were young and had your own problems. But as soon as you had realised you came running to him, apologising and bringing a bunch of food for him. When it got colder you started to steal some of your dad´s overalls and took pillows and blankets from the guest rooms, your parents never bothered to enter. All so Jungkook wouldn't freeze. As soon as it got cold you also always started to bring him some traditional Christmassy snacks and tea. Jungkook couldn't believe it when you stood in front of him on December 25th, with a present in your hand. "It's not much, but I thought you'd like it. I got it myself” you said proudly and when Jungkook opened it, he saw a pair of headphones. He was excited that he got a present for the first time, but he was confused what to do with it. He didn't own anything he could plug them into. You noticed this and handed him another box, in it was an ep3 player. Jungkooks eyes grew wide, "Why would you gift me something like that?" You grinned, "Because I know you'd like it" Jungkook swore he could have started crying then and there, but he opted for pulling you into a bone crushing hug. That night he fell asleep, listening to the music you downloaded onto the player. Jungkook kept walking, thanking whoever was responsible for him ending up with you. While he was walking he realised, that there was your old dancing studio on the way. He remembered the time, where the teacher didn't come to your house and someone had to drive you here, your mother never wanted to do it, so she hired a private trainer for you, who came over. Sometimes he would even pick you up from school, so you could immediately start practicing; those were the days when you were too tired to even wave Jungkook who was living in the shed in your garden. You told him that having a private teacher had a lot of pros, seeing as the teacher had his whole attention on you, but that also meant that you couldn't dance with you friends anymore or have a group play, from that point on, you always danced alone. Jungkook stopped at the window of the studio, watching the children dance. As he continued to walk, he saw someone dance in the back. Jungkooks eyes grew big, that was a hybrid dancing. He tried to make out what kind of hybrid though, probably cat by the way he elegantly jumped, his bushy tail helping him keeping the balance, but a beanie covered his ears, so he wasn't 100% sure. Before he could continue to walk, Jungkook saw how an elderly man came up to the hybrid, starting to yell at him. Jungkook couldn't tell what they were talking about, but he guessed it was about the hybrids dance, because the man kept showing him with gestures what the hybrid should do. The hybrid said something; his tail was slowly swaying from side to side, meaning he was getting angry. Jungkook had his fair share of meet and greets with stray cats, so he knew when to back off. The man didn't apparently, because faster than Jungkook could track the movements of the man’s hand was the hybrids face slapped and turned to the side. The man had slapped him, the hybrid stood stiff. Jungkook didn't know what happened next, because something wet hit him, then again. He looked up to see dark clouds forming in the sky, he cursed and started to walk quickly to the store, knowing you didn't like him being out when it rains or starts to get dark. As he arrived at the shop he pulled out the shopping list you wrote him and he marvelled again how pretty your handwriting was. He grabbed the veggies that you needed for dinner tomorrow and decided he would try to prepare steak again. The last time he tried to make it, it ended up being really though and he couldn't even chew it properly. He grabbed to already cut steaks, in case he would ruin one again and headed to the next aisle. The shelf in front of him was full with protein and weight loss powders, how was he supposed to know what to buy. He sighed and texted you, if you had any specific wishes. While he waited for your reply he continued to stroll through the market, grabbing some snacks, dips and frozen berries that you could use to make smoothies with. When you didn't answer after ten minutes he decided to just grab something himself. He studied the content of the boxes and compered them, because he still didn't want to just grab anything, when it was you who would consume it. Jungkook was a bit worried and annoyed when you didn't even answer, after he was already on his way back home. It didn't help his mood that the rain was still pouring down. Jungkook pulled his hood deeper, regretting that he bought so much, that he was now carrying five shopping bags. It was starting to get dark and there was almost no one on the streets, that why Jungkook was surprised to see someone sitting on the ground. He scoffed at first, why would someone sit outside in the ground while it was raining. When he walked closer he recognised that the building the person was sitting in front of was your old dance studio. And then he realised who that person was, it was the hybrid who got slapped. Next to him a small bag and Jungkook put two and two together, not thinking much before coming to a halt in front of the hybrid. The hybrid immeasurable looked up, hissing at Jungkook and Jungkook quickly understood why. His hood covered his ears and the rain probably washed most of his scent away. He slowly pulled his hood down, revealing his bunny ears and the hybrids position changed. "What do you want?" asked the hybrid a bit annoyed, but Jungkook didn't let himself be irritated by that, he had seen that the hybrid had a bad day. "I- I was wondering if you are alright? I saw you dancing earlier. I also saw what that man did." Jungkook didn't sound as confident as he wanted to, but while he was speaking he realised that he had no idea what he was even doing. The hybrids eye grew wide, "You saw?" Jungkook felt guilty as he looked into the hybrids eyes. Should he have done something? He couldn't have just walked in there and told the man off, maybe if he was a human, but not as a hybrid, he would have been probably slapped too. "Yeah.. I was passing by when I saw. Did he kick you out?" Jungkooks eyes landed on the bag next to the hybrid, "Gee, what gave you that impression?" the hybrid scoffed sarcastic, but quickly caught himself, "He was unsatisfied with my dancing for a while now, I guess me talking back didn't really help my cause. Who knows, maybe he's right" the way the hybrid talked remembered him of you, before his mind told him otherwise his heart already spoke for him. "Do you want a place to stay? It's supposed to be raining all week. Trust me; it’s not fun looking for shelter in the rain." The hybrid narrowed his eyes, looking for a sign, that this could be a trap, but he only found Jungkooks sincere eyes. The hybrids gaze softened and he agreed, he too thought it would be hard to find a place to sleep, so when a nice bunny hybrid offered shelter he wouldn't say no. "Great!" Jungkook smiled his bunny smile, "I'm Jungkook, by the way. And since we have the same destination, how about you take one or two of the shopping bags?" The hybrid stood up and Jungkook smiled as he saw, that the man in front of him was smaller than him. The hybrid pulled off his hat, combed quickly through his blond hair and put the beanie back one. Jungkook saw that the hybrid in front of him a cat was, which should have made him feel unsafe, but right now Jungkook could only focus on his dripping wet clothes. It must have been an hour since he left you at home and you also still didn't text back. The cat took some bags, before looking at Jungkook, "I'm Jimin" The men walked in a quick pace back to your home, doing some light small talk. "You're older than me? But you are soo small" Jungkook exclaimed, earning an evil glance from the man next to him which made him shut up real quick. They didn't have long till they reached the house when Jimin spoke up again, "So your owner..." Jimin realised that Jungkooks owner probably didn’t sent him out to get groceries and a new hybrid, he didn’t want the younger one to get in trouble, but when he saw a loving smile growing on the bunny’s face he relaxed a bit. "Oh y/n! She's amazing, she'll be surprised when she sees us both, but I'll talk to her. She won't mind you staying with us, we have more than enough room at the house" Jimin wondered how the house would look like if Jungkook said, that the house was big. His last owner lived in the tiny flat above the dance studio, so Jimin couldn't imagine how a spacious house would look like. Now that he saw Jungkook up close he recognised that the clothes he wore were from pretty big and expensive fashion labels. Jimin couldn't deny it, Jungkook was pretty handsome, he could imagine how the bunny would look under him. "It's just around the corner", Jungkook said and Jimin looked at his surroundings, they were definitely in the more wealthy part of town and Jimin started to think about how you would be. Jungkook said you were amazing, maybe you were a lawyer or a business woman, and you were probably pretty busy if you sent Jungkook for groceries. He imagined a woman in her thirties maybe, you would have to be pretty rich to be here. Jungkook opened the gate to the house and Jimin looked amazed. It was a two story building, not necessarily a mansion, but big enough that Jimin understood why Jungkook said, that space isn't an issue. They walked through the front door to be met by silence. "She's probably sleeping" Jungkook said as he took off his shoes and Jacket, telling Jimin he would take his Jacket so they could dry it. Jungkook explained Jimin were the kitchen was and asked him to put the groceries there while he sorted out their drenched jackets. Jimin was amazed as he walked through the house, almost scared to get to close things in case he broke them. There was a sculpture in the entrance hall that he was sure cost more than his last owner would make in a year. He looked at the pictures in the hall, almost everyone had a small girl in it, he decided that this was probably the daughter of y/n. He smelled the place, but Jungkooks was the most prominent, though he could make out something sweet, which alone gave him a comfortable feeling already. "Yah, you're slow" came Jungkook from behind, carrying the rest of the bags. They quickly sorted the food in the kitchen, well more like Jungkook did that and Jimin was amazed by how many things they had in the kitchen. "Okay, you should meet y/n real quick then you can have a shower", Jungkook said looking at the older who nodded, a bit nervous. There was a chance that you would tell him to go, he looked out the window, it just stopped raining, but that would only be for today. "She should be in the living room, I looked in the bedroom already" Jungkook mumbled and walked with big steps to the next room, only to find it empty. Jungkook groaned and threw his head back, exposing his neck, hut Jimin shouldn't focus on that, y/n was missing apparently. Not for long though, because the second Jungkook saw the open garden door he huffed annoyed. "She better pray she only just went out now and did not fall asleep in the rain. I swear to god" there were a few more curse words and Jimin looked at Jungkook, why would he talk like that about his owner? It's not like the bunny could actually do something. But Jimin was even more confused when Jungkook came back with the girl from the pictures. That couldn't be y/n the owner, you were so young. Your sweet scent filled the room, but it didn't match your whiny tone or Jungkooks mad face. "Kookie", you whined, curling further into his arms, as he was carrying you, your clothes were wet. You had fallen asleep on the Hollywood swing and had luck, that it was partially covered, so you weren't completely exposed to the rain. "Don't 'Kookie' me, baby. I told you to be good didn't I? And where to I find you? Outside, completely soaked and asleep" Jimin turned his head to fast he swore he got whiplash. 'Baby'?! Jimin had the feeling this wasn't really an owner-pet situation, the way Jungkook spoke, even if it was low, because you were still sleepy, made Jimin want to drop to his knees. Which would never happen of course, seeing as A) Jungkook obviously already had someone and B) Park Jimin would never fall to his knees to submit to someone. You opened your eyes to look up to Jungkook and pouted, "I was good. I was reading, it's not my fault I fell asleep, I wasn't planning on it" Jungkook chuckled quietly at how whiny you sounded at the aspect of not being a good girl. He quickly kissed you, forgetting the cat that was looking with big eyes, only as he sat you down, he realised he should maybe make you aware of your new guest. "Baby, there is something I should tell you. On the way back, there was a small incident, that lead me to take a hybrid with me" he carefully watched your reaction, while Jungkook was pretty much in charge, this was still your house and in a way he only had power because you let him. He knew with other people it wouldn't be like that. You blinked slowly, "Wait a hybrid? Another bunny?" you asked him, before your eyes found Jimin and quickly realised, that he was not a bunny. "He has nowhere to go, baby. You know we have enough room", Jungkook continued and you nodded, "A serious incident?" You asked and both men nodded. "Okay, stay as long as you need. I'm y/n" A smile grew on both men’s faces and the cat quickly introduced himself as Jimin. After that you and Jungkook showed him his new room and the bathroom he could use, before leaving him on his own. In your shared bedroom you removed your clothes, shivering in the cold, quickly jumping into the shower with Jungkook, who started to massage shampoo in your hair. You lean back and enjoy the sensation, "Such a good girl" he praised, "Letting someone in need stay here. My little dancer has such a big heart. Love you" you didn't know, why he was thanking you for letting Jimin stay, as if you would let him back on the streets. You smiled up at him, "My big bunny saved him in the first place didn't he?" you asked, only to sneeze immediately after, Jungkook groaned. "Of course now you're getting sick. Because you just had to fall asleep in the rain", he complained, but you both knew that in the end he didn't mind taking care of you.

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nitannichionne · 4 years

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Luna IV, Chapter 4: Dinner and Dessert (Cavill Syverson Fanfic)

You take your time cooking. You investigate the kitchen slowly as you go, giving yourself time to acclimate and hopefully get a better grip on your feelings. You can hear Sy stirring about the house, though you don't know what he is doing or where he is inside it, for that matter. You take deep breaths to soothe your nerves, allowing the smell of food to relax you and waft through the house. You are suddenly thankful you spent time with the cook growing up; you can make a meal for two or for a party.

Tears fill your eyes. You never dreamed your imprisonment would be this way. You are ready to fight other women. You are ready to protect poor soul like Gabrielle. You are ready to be in solitary confinement. You are ready for a lot of things, but not this. You simply are not ready for him, your private jailer, your private warden to “train” you.

You assessed Sy even as you bucked against him earlier. He is not a violent man, at least, not toward women. He is a no-nonsense man; you smile, noting your warden's similarity to your father, missing him so, but immediately steel the warm feeling that comes with it. Sy is shorter than your father, smaller, but he looks just as strong...perhaps because he is younger.

You didn't miss that body—Sy looks battle ready even if he hasn't seen it in some time. His eyes are very blue, and you watched the tint change with his mood-steel calm, glints of gray with concern, electric blue when he was lighthearted, a storm at sea when he takes you...stop it, you tell yourself. Don’t drown in those eyes, just learn to interpret them so you can find ways around them, you tell yourself, no matter how beautiful you think they are... That stupid system you hate had picked your jailer, and you have to mentally give them credit: They picked right.

You are plating food as Sy enters the kitchen, reminding you of a beast led by his nose. He stands behind and almost over you as you go about your task, seemingly inhaling the meal that promises to be delicious, but you feel like he is also sniffing your hair.

“Jasmine?” he murmurs.

“What?”

He shakes his head, and swallows hard. “Nothing.”

Your whole body tingles with awareness. He was sniffing your hair. They allowed you to pick your scented soap, which you thought was ridiculous, but now makes sense. And he was right-you used jasmine…and he likes it.

He sits down and looks at the food as you bring it to him. “You can cook.”

“My father had a chef.”

“This will be quite a pleasure then,” he says, still looking at the food. “I have not had a trainee in some time. I am usually in charge of the others to make sure they are not abusive, but they asked me to take you on.”

You have nothing to say to that. You go to the cooling unit and see quite a few choices to accompany the main course. You turn and put your hands behind your back in “at ease” position. “What would you like with this?”

He recognizes the military stance, and tenses.

That’s right, you got more than you bargained for, you tell him with your eyes. You don’t know who you’re fucking with.

His gaze roves over your body and again, the sets the unwanted sensual tension between you. You lift your chin, telling yourself not to care, and await his answer. "I don't care, really."

"May I suggest you eat first, and wait a little on drinking?" you ask as you turn to the cooling unit to make a selection.

"To speed my digestion."

You turn with a fruity but light wine. "Yes."

He smiles slowly. "Thank you, I'll take your suggestion." He gestures for you to sit.

You warily do so, hoping to eat alone, but now you realize he expects you to eat with him. Your gazes lock, neither taking eyes off the other. You realize he is going to be the most formidable opponent you’ve ever had in your life, mostly because he is compatible with you. You work to not allow your gaze to waver. This was a staring contest, but he is already playing dirty, allowing his eyes to smolder as if he has more on his mind than food. A small smirk crosses his features and you realize the flush of your cheeks might have been visible. Damn!

He lifts the plate to rotate and sniff it. He gives you a look of approval that doesn't surprise you and takes his first forkful. The food melts in his mouth and he closes his eyes for a moment to enjoy it, then opens his eyes and frowns. "Where is your plate?"

"I can eat now?"

He suppresses a chuckle at your sarcastic tone, and you are disappointed that he is not easily irritated. "Of course. I'm no brute." You do not move, and he whispers your name to make you lock eyes with him again. “I’m not.”

That remains to be seen, your glare tells him. Maybe if you stay this way, watch him eat, you will eat alone--

"If you didn't make enough, I will share with you."

Your eyebrows rise at that.

"Yes, I think that's a good idea," he smiles, seeing your discomfort.

You take a deep breath, and close your eyes briefly. He is amused at your struggle to control your temper. You have been trying to prick his and got nothing but amusement from him. Your words are slow and measured: "I assure you—"

“I don’t mind feeding you, pet.” He voice is smooth, seductive, letting the double meaning sink in fully. “Not at all.”

You go and get your plate, almost slamming the platter down, but slowing just as it touches the table. You sit and look up at him, burning with frustration. He had won this round. He raises his fork in salute and you begin eating.

He keeps looking at you as if he wants to say something, ask something, but doesn’t. He is giving you time to adjust and you wish he’d get on with it, give you reason to hate him. "I want you to know that I am not a cruel man, and have never been a cruel warden. I meant what I said: you will determine how difficult things get."

You tense. This whole system is bullshit, you want to tell him.

He doesn’t miss your expression and takes a deep breath as you avert your eyes. "What is it?"

"That may be true, but you are part of a cruel system."

"That may be true, but you killed someone."

Your head snaps up, your eyes sparking. He looks like he wished he hadn’t said that, but he made that mistake-his first. "One that you know of." You swallow hard; there was no victory in that.

He takes a napkin and dabs at the corner of your eyes and you snatch it, angry at yourself for one drop of emotion escaping you. "I realize you seem to have deep seated anger—"

"Seem?" You laugh, but now you feel floodgates threatening to open. The death of your father, being under scrutiny, having everything taken from you, being offered like a piece of meat to a man you barely know and don’t want, only to be convicted for not allowing him to claim you, being humiliated, convicted, jailed. NO! He is part of that system, you tell yourself. You look at the plate, and drop your fork.

"What?"

"I'm not hungry."

"You must eat," he says softly, slowing his eating with concern in his eyes. "You have not eaten in over twelve hours."

"I am not hungry," she smile with a sneer, your voice a whisper. You don’t care if the tears are in your eyes.

He sighs heavily and avert his eyes, only to raise them to you again, his expression soft and pleading. "Please...I want you to stay as healthy as you are now."

Your smile fades. You are conditioned for certain kinds of combat, of punishment, but not kindness.

He pours you a small glass of wine, and leans closer. "Please."

He watches and waits for your reaction. You were going to fight him and the moons?! If he came any closer, it wouldn't be just food you would have to try to fight your desire for. You pick up your fork again, and avert your eyes.

“Thank you.”

Sy finishes his dinner, and you expect him to get up and leave.

He doesn’t.

He watches you eat.

You are nervous, and your stomach probably can't take more than a little at a time right now. Every time you take a bite, he licks his lips. Every time you drink, he stares at your body in building appreciation and lust. You become a bundle of nerves under his gaze. When you finally finish eating, he drinks the last of his wine, and rises from his chair. You exhale heavily, thinking he was going to walk by you but he grabs your wrist, and leads you back to the lounger.

He settles you back against the pillows, taking the dress off you again. "That was delicious."

You squirm under him, unsure if you are trying to get closer or find the chance to escape.

"I trust you can make desserts...with the same skill?" He begins kissing the hollow of her throat, and murmurs your name, urging you to answer.

"Y-yes,” you breathe, the sound of your name from his lips stroking your nerves in a delicious way.

"Good." With that, he kisses you slowly, and you both release a small sigh of pleasure at tasting wine in each other's mouths. He lowers his head to your breasts, gently taking turns on suckling each as he thrusts his fingers inside you, making you gasp and whimper at how wet and ready you are for him, how the ache leapt within you and spread. He uses a slow rhythm on you, calming you yet helping you learn to revel in the satisfaction he can give you. You arch and gasp as your wetness flows over his fingers. "Good..." He lowers his head between your legs, his fingers still in place, and works you again, his fingers thrusting in a slightly faster rhythm as his tongue sucks and laps at you.

You pant and twist, clawing at the pillows around you. He reaches up with his free hand and brings your hand to the back of his head slowly, and you bring the other down to him, cradling and caressing his head as your hips come off the lounger. He moans in response to your cries drinking you as you feel lightheaded. Finally he climbs over you and thrusts into you again. You arch to him, reveling in how he stretches and fills you, and your body instinctively clasps to him as he begins a hard quick rhythm that would satisfy you both.

He begins pounding harder as your body yields everything to him and he holds you in place. Your arms and legs embrace him as you scream. He keeps his piston-like rhythm going, and you pulsate around him uncontrollably as your head fall backs back feeling his seed heat and coat your inner walls as he growls in your ear and then bites your neck softly, drawing small tremors from you.

Sy picks you up, and carries you to bed. He lays you down on your side and positions himself behind you, his hands stroking your limbs to soothe you. "Sleep now," He purrs, kissing your hair. "rest." You want to stay awake to spite him but with all the events of the day, sleep takes you in minutes.He could tell she wanted to stay awake, but with all the events of the day, sleep takes you in minutes.

Let me know if you want to be tagged for this story! Thanks.

#Henry cavill #henrycavill X reader #henry cavill fanfic #syverson fic #captain syverson #superman #geralt #henry cavill cast #romance #passion #prisoner

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danideservedbetter · 3 years

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Day 7, 8, 9, and 10 / Elaboration

Hey y’all! I said yesterday I would elaborate a little more on what my doctor’s visit yesterday told me, and here I am to do just that! I meant to yesterday, honestly, but by the time I got home my medicine had worn off and that wasn’t looking very likely 😅😅 But regardless!!! Here is what my results look like and honestly? These things probably have been affecting my sleeping disorder to a degree I’d previously disregarded without detailed info I’ve gotten from these tests.

Full write up under the cut!

—I got two major tests done, blood work and a genetics test. Back in my hometown the nurses couldn’t even figure out how to open the damn swab, but technology here managed to map out my entire DNA sequence which is utterly NUTS to me.

—My body is deficient in almost every important vitamin known to mankind, which makes sense because my diet is not… the best 😅 So, I started on several (SEVERAL) supplements to start out.

—I say start out because it’s very likely that I’ll be taking vitamin C and some liver enzyme through an IV once a month. A younger me might’ve thought something like this was scary, but at this point I’m so desperate to be healthy that getting nutrients drip fed into my system for them to work quicker sounds just fine to me.

—Other than that it’s normal lifestyle stuff. Eat more fruits and vegetables (I’ve been eating olives by the can for like days and I intend to buy fresh fruit packets for breakfast whenever I can afford them) as well as staying more active— which I DEFINITELY have been since I moved closer to New Orleans, in Louisiana proper where my dad lives.

But enough of the boring medicinal stuff. I’m sure you guys are much more interested in the whys— is there a reason my hypersomnia is so bad? Is there a deeper explanation than “lack of vitamins bad and you should feel bad”?

Well, yeah. YES. The genetics test revealed a metric fuckton to say the least 😂😂😂 but the most important was what kinds of diseases I’m predisposed to or how my body can process certain types of hormones/enzymes/proteins. Things like why caffeine won’t work for me (my body processes it very fast but not very thoroughly) or my metabolism being the strongest recorded genotype (which is why it’s been so hard to gain weight). Below, I’ll go into detail about stuff my new general doctor’s in-office geneticist (I still can’t believe that’s a thing I’m typing) has revealed about my disorder.

Naturally, this is specific to me because of my parents and our family lines. Maybe if you see info pertinent to yourself, looking into genetic mapping may be a good idea for you?

We are pretty confident that I have Idiopathic Hypersomnia. The reason for this is that a tiny link has been found between individuals who contracted mononucleosis in their childhood and adolescence and individuals who fell within the sleep cycles indicating IH. Now, IH will be genetic sometimes, but considering I’ve tracked my disorder to starting around 14, the same year I contracted Mono, the coincidence definitely doesn’t seem like… well, a coincidence. My blood test shows that I do in fact have the antibodies in my system, and they’re doing something… odd.

The geneticist found some “active” antibodies. Well, not some, really 😅 Basically, she’s surmised that these antibodies have a hair-trigger response and can react to any given environmental factor (stress, hunger, etc.) to the point where they activate as if they think they’re **fighting off a virus that’s been out of my system for ten years.** Of course this takes up an inordinate amount of energy, which is her hypothesis as to why my hypersomnia is so random and varies in intensity. The goal for this summer is flushing these antibodies out of my system.

My previous neurologist tried out a couple stimulants and then shit insurance prevented me from trying any others. So I’m stuck on something traditionally prescribed for adhd. A narcotic. *However* since my body is severely dysfunctional in general, the way I describe it is I basically have to induce a high to stay awake and function normally. We want to eventually get me off of these kinds of drugs, of course, since prolonged exposure weakens their effects and they’re highly addictive.

Another in credibly interesting thing we found is that I'm lacking in three major hormones. However, it's not because I don't produce them. I've never identified with symptoms of depression (anxiety, certainly, but not depression) yet for most of my life my childhood general practitioner insisted I had it. Well, the geneticist found that while I'm lacking in serotonin, dopamine, and melatonin, which yes are the two major mood enhancers and then the hormone that induces sleep, it's not because I can't produce them. It's because my neural transmitters are so damaged from a less-than-good diet and years of exhaustion that they simply can't process them. Just as the antibodies can have a hair-trigger response to environmental factors, so too can these processors. Simple things like a good meal, my high from my stimulants, or even micro dopamine shots from getting things done can activate the transmitters. Another thing on the docket for the summer is fixing these permanently with treatments of vitamins and supplements.

My stimulants have caused appetite issues, unfortunately, and that plus Covid at the beginning of this year caused me to get down to my lowest recorded weight ever, 94 pounds, which I haven't weighed since before I hit my final growth spurt way back in middle school. My dad does physical labor (he's a contractor who frames houses in the humid heat of the Deep South lol) so he's used to feeling tired. When he caught Covid, he said that he'd never felt as tired, drained, or out of it in his entire life. He never gets sick and hardly goes to the doctor and NEVER takes off work because of health, but in his last few weeks before full recovery he had to take off early multiple times. He was floored when he described the brain fog and exhaustion and I told him that I had no idea I even had Covid, because I just thought it was my disorder acting up. It was only when my grandmother started feeling tired that we got tested and we tested positive.

All that said, we think that there's hope for a future for me. She said that while there's no cure for IH, the cause that I have may can be mitigated by changes in exercise, diet, routine, and medication,to the point where I may mitigate symptoms of my disorder entirely. I'm still setting up appointments with a new neurologist here in the city, though, because technology is of course more advanced here.

And again, taking all of this into consideration, while it was looking likelier by the day, we've both agreed that I'll be here in the city 'til New Years. Which means no school this semester, but if I can go back in spring at more than 20% functionality and maybe succeed, I'm perfectly fine having to remain on break.

However, another good update: I weigh 103 pounds! I'm steadily gaining weight-- which means the other medication, the one for my appetite, is working as it should and as long as I stay on-track I should reach my goal of 120 by the end of the year as well.

So, yeah! That's what it's looking like. I have another appointment to go more in depth with the results tomorrow, but for now I'm planning out my week since I decided to let myself rest all last week. I'd love to finish helping out for our current podfic, ACTUALLY start the damn 100 Theme Challenge (LOL), finish betaing something that's been on hold for months, properly reconnect with our discord, catch up on all the media I fell behind on, clean my damn room, and establish a budget for this week on what I can buy. A more specific plan for today will follow, but til then, I hope this gives everyone some insight on what I'm looking at and how I'm gonna try to fix it.

Xoxo

Dani

#idiopathic hypersomnia #TW: weight #TW: anxiety/depression mention #health post #genetics

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khiphop-stories · 5 years

Text

Getting Off The Wrong Foot

[Christian Yu | Chapter X]

Warning: This chapter is quite long, consider it a double update, since I suck at posting regularly lol. A lot of things happening in this chapter, I hope you like it! Feedback is always appreciated! Stay safe and healthy guys!

Previous Chapters:

”So…what’s up Jay?” You mustered his face through narrowed eyes as your suspicion grew. It would be a lie to said you didn’t think this was weird. Jay had just appeared at your office without prior announcement and insisted on having lunch with you, so now here you two were — sitting across from each other and finishing the last bites of your meal, pretending like you didn’t just have a huge argument the other day. You talked about all kinds of topics like you always used to with the exception of one. But it was only a matter of time until one of you had to address it in order to sort it out.

“I-I haven’t been a very good friend to you lately…I guess I’m trying to make up for it,” Jay stuttered as he scratched the back of his head awkwardly. He was never really a big talker. That’s why a lot of people always described him as cold and distant, sometimes they would go as far as call him rude. He found it incredibly hard to express his feelings or show his emotions, but he always tried his best with you. You saw his efforts, even just the slightest attempt was good enough for you.

“It’s ok,” you reassured him with a warm smile.

“It’s really not. I was a little bit selfish,“ he let out a long sigh followed by silence. “What do you mean?” You titled your head, blinking your eyes at him confused.

“Honestly? I really wanted Kiseok and you to get back together. I wanted for all of us to hang out like we used to do. I missed having you around. That’s why I pushed you into forgiving him.”

“I don’t know if I can forgive him, Jay.”

“I know,“ he nodded his head. “You don’t have to. He hurt you. You have every right to be mad at him. I’m not gonna meddle in your relationships anymore.”

“Relationships? Plural?” You cocked up a brow at him. Jay had always been a rather nosy person, especially regarding your relationships. He always gave you dating tips and it was Jay who played cupid, when both Kiseok and you were too shy and cautious to make the first step, even though it was painfully obvious to anyone around you that you had feelings for each other. Jay hesitated a moment before answering.

“You and Christian…”

“There’s no me and Christian,” you let out a brief chuckle in disbelief, rolling your eyes at him. Considering what had occurred in the past between them, you understood why Jay bore a grudge against Christian, but there wasn’t anything going on between the two of you. It was merely sex. “I’ve told you it’s not like that.” “I know, but what I’m trying to say is…I wouldn’t mind…even if it were like that.” “Thanks, but that’s not gonna happen,” you denied it without hesitation. You let out a brief laugh. Whatever Jay was insinuating was so unlikely that it sounded ridiculous to you. Christian had showed no interest in you and he made it clear that he wasn’t looking for something serious whereas you were still struggling to get over your ex.

“I saw him looking after you at the launching party.”

“So?” “Live was about to perform. There were some issues backstage.” “So?” You repeated even more impatient than before, not understanding what he was trying to get at. “He should have fixed the issue himself or at least waited for them to get fixed. He’s part of their crew after all, but instead he went after you. Because in that moment you were more important to him than the performance.”

“You’re reading way too much into it, Jay,” you laughed, gently shaking your head at him.

There must have been a simple explanation for this, you thought. Christian probably went looking for me to help fix whatever issues they were having and then got entangled in a conversation with me and he simply forgot his initial intention - and there it was again and this time you even caught yourself doing it. Yet again you expected the worst of him. You treated him like a person who was unable to care and show affection.

“Whatever, that’s not the point,” Jay chirped in. “I’m just saying…don’t hold back because of me. If you like him, just go for—.”

“I don’t like him…not like that” you cut him off immediately.

“I’m saying, if.” “There’s no if,” you strongly denied again.

“Ok fine,” Jay laughed at your insistence. “Then let’s just say, whatever you…want to do, I’ll have your back.”

~*~

[Time Leap]

Out of everything that had happened the other day at the Nike launching party, it were Christian’s words that lingered on your mind. No matter what you were doing, the things he has said to you just kept following you like a shadow. The worst thing of it all was the he was right and you caught yourself doing exactly what he had accused you of. The moment you had met him, you expected the worst from him. He could have been the kindest and most caring guy in the world, yet at the back of your head he would still be the heartless womanizer. He never did anything that would justify why you thought so badly of him. But you let the past you thought you knew about him define him. You let the rumors you had heard about him shape the picture you had of him. None of it was fair to him.

“Hey.”

The surprise was written across his face, his eyes and mouth were frozen wide open. It took a second or two for him process what was right in front of him. “I didn’t think I’d see you again,” his eyes softened at you and the corners of his mouth curled upwards into a small smile.

“I-I came to return your jacket.” You lifted the brown paper bag in your hands up, before handing it to him. He pushed himself up from his chair and took it back into his possession.

“Thanks.” His eyes never left yours. He didn’t even break the eye contact to check the content of the bag.

“You were right…I judged you.” You paused for him to say something, but he didn’t so an awkward silenced took over. He didn’t give off the impression that he wanted to break it, so you continued speaking.

“I guess it would be a lot easier for me if you were the guy from the rumors.”

“Why?” He furrowed his brows at you, the tone of his voice reflecting the confusion that was on his face.

“Then I wouldn’t get attached to you,” you told him honestly and it felt like you were stripping down naked. You had never showed yourself so vulnerable in front of anyone, not even Kiseok. You had always keep your pride and dignity with him, but standing here in front of Christian you tossed all of that away.

“I don’t mind if you do.”

You cocked up a brow and eyed him with disbelief as a quiet chuckle left your lips.

“You’re kidding, right?”

“You think I’ll leave? Well, I’m not. Whether we fuck or not.”

“So, if I were to say that I…wanted to stop sleeping with you—“

“I’d still listen to you whine about Kiseok,” he added playfully, a smile played on his lips.

“Why?” “Believe it or not, I care about you and by the way Minhee, you already ended it.”

“When did I do such thing?” You furrowed your eyebrows, pretending not to know what he was talking about. “When you were trying to be considerate towards Jay’s feelings.”

“Doesn’t ring a bell,” you shrugged your shoulders indifferently. Of course you remembered, after all you had replayed the conversation with him inside of your head again and again. However, despite what you had said, you weren’t ready to give up on your only escape from reality. Right now Christian was one of the few things that you looked forward to and kept you sane. You weren’t ready to deal with your feelings and broken heart yet, running away from your problems was way more appealing to you. “I guess you’re taking it back then?” Christian nodded his head knowingly as a teasing grin spread across his face.

He took a step towards you, shortening the distance between the two of you. He stared deep into your eyes. He cupped your cheek that was slowly turning red. “Does that mean I’m still allowed to do this…” He grinned at you before slowly leaning into you. You shut your eyes in anticipation, allowing him to do whatever he was going to do next. His soft lips brushed against yours, gently and slowly. Like a tease he pulled away, before you could lose yourself in that kiss. You whimpered at the loss of contact and opened your eyes again.

“Damn you, Christian,” you cursed at him as you realized he was just teasing you to begin with. “The guys are gonna be back in couple minutes,” he confessed, knowing if he gave in to his desires now, the guys would probably walk in on you. Although he pulled back, his eyes were telling you that he wanted you, right then, right there. “That’s my cue.” “Can I come over later?”

You both felt the tension. Your insides craved his touch. You craved his touch. You nodded once, a slight barely noticeable nod as you didn’t want to seem too eager. With a grin on his lips he gave you a quick peck before releasing your from his grip.

~*~

[Time leap]

Christian’s gaze cruised your figure which he had done before - multiple times even - and you got pretty much used to his unrelenting stare, but this time the look in his eyes was different. He wasn’t admiring you, it appeared as though he was in disbelief mixed with a little bit of confusion.

“Don’t get me wrong, Min, you look lovely as always…but what the hell are you wearing?” With a chuckle he shook his head at you while he was still mustering you with his eyes.

Your eyes trailed down your own body. You really liked the outfit you were wearing. It was simple and casual. You wore your favorite t-shirt combined with a skirt. Then your eyes darted to him, scanning him from head to toe. “Why are you so dressed up?”

He was dressed in a white t-shirt - nothing out of the ordinary - but the black suit jacket, black pants, and dress shoes made it seem like he was starring in a James Bond movie. “I told you my aunt’s a little bit extra.”

You blinked at him confused still not understanding what he was getting at.

“It’s a formal party, didn’t I tell you?” “Nope.” you shook your head. Even your makeup was kept minimal, reserved to a sweep of mascara. You thought it was going to be a casual party as most of the guests were either family members or people who were coming as a plus one.

“Sorry, my bad. Can you change?”

~*~

You changed into a simple black dress which was much more suitable for this kind of occasion and Christian seemed to approve as well. He stared at you, unconsciously biting down on his lips.

You walked to the table where you had your makeup sprawled. It was probably not that good of idea to change into the dress before putting on your makeup, but you didn’t have the time to worry about that now. You didn’t want to be the reason Christian arrived late to his aunt’s birthday celebration. You never used foundation because lucky enough you were blessed with even skin. But you did put on some concealer to hide away blemishes. Then you applied brown-reddish eye shadows and black eyeliner. Since you had already layered on some mascara you skipped that step and finished with a deep velvety shade on your lips. Earrings were fastened to your ears, before you clapped your hands together in content.

“Ready!” You exclaimed enthusiastically, but you received no response from Christian so you turned around to check what he was doing. You saw him sprawled on your bed, his chest rising and falling rhythmically. When you stepped closer you noticed that his eyes were closed. It didn’t even take you that long to get ready, maybe a good fifteen minutes, yet he had already fallen asleep. He must have really had overworked himself the past few days. You gently shook him by his shoulders to wake him up.

Christian jerked awake to see your grinning face. He immediately squinted his eyes as he was still getting used to the light.

“Shit, how long was I out?” He asked you, panic spreading across his face.

“Not long, but if we don’t wanna be late, we should go now”

He was still staring at you, his breaths becoming heavy and irregular. He pushed himself up by his elbow and got on his feet. Then he wrapped his arm around your body and swiftly turned you around. Before you could even process what was happening you felt his soft lips pressed against yours. You melted into the kiss, allowing him to deepen it. But you quickly snapped back and jerked away.

“What the hell are you doing? We’re gonna get late,” you reminded him of the time, but he didn’t seem to care that much.

“What if we do?” He hummed against your skin and left a trail of kisses along your neck.

“I don’t half ass things, Ian. If I’m gonna pretend to be your girlfriend, I’m gonna be the perfect fake girlfriend.”

“I’ll be quick,” he negotiated. He had already unzipped your dress by now and he was about to tear it off your body. “Christian Yu,” you warned him sharply. “Zip it up right now!” “Fine,” he gave in defeated, a heavy sigh leaving his lips. He turned you around and brushed your hair to the side, so it wouldn’t get caught in the zipper. The fabric of your dress tightened around your body again, but he didn’t stop there. You suddenly felt his soft lips brushing against your shoulder blades as he left a trail of wet kisses. His hand that was holding your hair earlier travelled down to your breasts, giving them a little squeeze before he pushed his lower body against yours grinding on you. “Christian Yu!” You shouted at him in disbelief. “Sorry, got carried away,” he quickly let go of you holdings his hands up in the air. “But we are going to continue this later, right?” “Depends on how you behave,” you stuck out your tongue at him and gave him a wink.

~*~

During the ride, Christian prepared you for the meeting with his family. He gave you a brief summary of everything you needed to know. He told you to definitely avoid his aunt if possible, because she was the hardest person to fool. She was known to have successfully set up some of his cousins, so she knew at first sight if there was some chemistry or not. He warned you not to talk to her without him being present to guide the direction of the conversation and help you out if you were in a sticky situation. You also made him promise that he wouldn’t leave your side. A promise as it later turned out, he wasn’t able to keep.

“Let’s get out stories straight. We worked on a project together. I was attracted to you and asked you out on a date. That’s how we started going out.”

It wasn’t that much of a lie. You did work with him on a project and he did feel attracted to you physically, you just never developed feelings for the other. Christian believed the more he stuck to the truth the easier it would be to fool his relatives. You didn’t have to remember too many lies and you could also improvise if needed. “That simple?” You cocked up a brow. “Why? You wanna add something?” “It sounds so…not romantic at all,” you said playfully as a chuckle left your lips.

“Then…how about…I fell in love with you at first sight and knew straight away you were the one,” he came up with a different scenario on the spot. “Now that just sounds unbelievable. Let’s just stick to the first one,” you laughed. “Do I need to know something about you?”

“My family knows me as a family man, so try not be too surprised.” “You?” You raised your brows at him in disbelief, trying to picture it inside your head.He didn’t give off the impression of a family man at all. He seemed rather independent and distant.

“And they don’t know that-“

“You sleep around?” You finished the sentence for him. “Yeah,” he nodded his head with an awkward laugh. “And they call me Rome. You should probably call be by that name too.” “Why?” “People close to me always call me that.” People in his private circle all called him Rome. Christian was the name he used at work.

“Anything else, Rome?” “That’s it.” ~*~

“Ok, here we go,” he took a deep breath, before he lifted his arm and pressed the bell. His hand was trembling a bit. You hadn’t seen him this tensed before. “Why are you so nervous?” You mustered his face. As though his nervousness was contagious you suddenly began to feel anxious too. “If you knew my family, you’d be nervous too,” he chuckled drily. His eyes flickered around the place and he couldn’t stand still. He rhythmically tapped his foot on the ground as you waited for someone to answer the door. Suddenly he passed the present he was holding from one hand to the other and held out his freed hand, looking at you expectantly. It took you a moment to understand what he wanted from you and it made you burst out into laughter. “Are you serious? You’re so stiff, it looks unnatural.” You said in between laughter.

“Why? Real couples hold hands, don’t they?”

“You look like you are being held at gunpoint. Just act natural!”

“If you were my girlfriend, I would hold your hand.” “You’re sweating!”

As you were bickering back and forth the door suddenly opened, revealing an elder woman. Her skin looked youthful, it was obvious that she must have put a lot of effort on keeping her skin looking so smooth. If you had to guess you would say she was in her late forties, but she probably looked younger than her actual age. Some of her facial features looked similar to Christian’s. Considering those similarities it wasn’t hard to guess her identity. “Hi mum,” Christian greeted her brightly. She was ecstatic to see her son, the corners of her lips rose upwards into a big smile. Without further hesitation she pulled her son into her arms, embracing him with her warmth. He took his face into her hands, inspecting him closely. “You’re overworking yourself again, aren’t you?” She nagged worriedly as she saw the big bags under his eyes and he looked visibly more exhausted than the last time she had seen him. But that was partly due to him being sick last week. He hadn’t fully recovered from his cold yet.

“And you must be Minhee,” her eyes wandered to you. She gave you a smile that just seemed so genuinely sweet that an unexpected warmth rushed through you. You immediately felt comfortable around her. “Rome has told me so much about you. It’s nice to finally meet you.”

You glanced at Christian with a raised brow, wondering what he had told her. This wasn’t even a real relationship, why would he talk about you with his mother?

You were about to introduce yourself politely with a handshake as you were taught by your parents, but she was quicker. She pulled you into a hug, gently patting your back.

“Come in, come in,” she invited you into the house. She linked her arms with yours and pulled you along while Christian was walking next to you. Your eyes travelled around the house and now you knew why Christian described his aunt as extra. The house wasn’t that big, but the interior made you feel like a princess in a castle. It was beautifully decorated with attention to every little detail. In the living room, where the live of the party was at, you could see caterers walking around in their black and white uniform serving finger food and drinks. There was a huge buffet on the table which was almost twice the size of Christian’s car. Next to it were piles of presents. Christian walked to the pile and left his own present on top of another, before he returned to you.

His mother began introducing you to a few family members and you also met his aunt briefly, though she had to disappear shortly after to take care of a few things. You didn’t know how you got here as everything happened so fast. But along the way you somehow got separated from Christian and now you were surrounded by his too curious female cousins and their friends who were peppering with questions about your supposed relationship with Christian.

“We all wondered what kind of girl he would bring this time,” one of them said and if you were being honest, you didn’t remember her name. There were just too many to remember. “The last time he introduced a girl two us was over two years ago,” another girl said. She pulled you closer and pretended to whisper into your ear, but she spoke so loudly that anyone around you could hear. “And between us, we didn’t like her that much.”

You furrowed your brows unconsciously as you recalled something he had said to you when you ran into each other in the club. He had told you about a girl who was obsessive and controlling. You wondered whether it was the same girl his cousin was talking about.

“She was a total gold digger. I’m so glad he’s not with her anymore,” they all agreed in unison.

“She bled him dry.”

At some point during your conversation one of the girls pulled you to the side. You remembered her introducing herself as Christian’s maternal cousin. She was a bit older than you and judging from the golden jewellery decorating her ring finger she was probably also married. She lowered her voice as she talked to you. “You know, Christian’s like a little brother to me. I’ve known him since he was a little baby. He might be a little reckless and dim at times, but he’s a good guy. He’s got his heart broken really badly the last time. Please take care of him.”

You nodded your head and promised to treat him well. You did feel bad for lying straight to her face when she had asked you for a favor in confidence, but since you had already agreed to do this for him you had no choice but to keep the act up.

“Tell me, is he good in bed?” One of the girls asked you out of the blue.

Hearing that question almost made you choke on the juice you were drinking. You coughed out loud to prevent the liquid from entering your lungs. “Excuse me?” You looked at her appalled by her blunt manner. You had figured she wasn’t one of his cousins and was probably a family friend, but you still didn’t expect such a straightforward question about your sex life.

“Don’t mind her. She’s had a huge crush on Rome since forever. She still fantasizes about him sometimes,” her best friend excused her brazen behavior.

“Whenever I see him I get dirty thoughts. I can’t help it,” she shrugged her shoulders unapologetically. Her eyes were still resting on you as if she was still expecting an answer to her question. “The sex is good, thanks,” you replied shortly. A memory of Christian’s exposed body flashed in front of your eyes, you felt the blood rush to your cheeks, blushing uncontrollably. Shaking your head, you attempted to rid yourself of any dirty thoughts that were crossing your mind. “That good, huh?” She smirked at you content with the answer your body had given her.

This conversation was getting more and uncomfortable by the second. You nervously glanced around the room, hoping to find Christian somewhere so you could escape from this interrogation. You needed to get out of this situation. If they continued asking you that many questions, to most you didn’t know the answer to, your little act might get exposed. You found him sitting at the table with his uncles who were having a drink with him. He quickly caught your eyes that were desperately screaming for help. He signalled you that he was coming over, before he turned his attention back to the table, probably excusing himself. Knowing he would be coming to save you, you felt relieved.

“Sorry, ladies. I’m afraid I have to steal my girlfriend back,” he apologised to the females in front of him as he held you by your waist. He pulled you close to him and led you away from them.

“You’re family is quite nosy,” you told him playfully as you let him guide you to an empty table. He pulled out the chair for you and waited for you to take a seat, before he sat down himself. As always he behaved like gentleman.

“I know, I know. Sorry for dragging you into this. They won’t ever let me live. That’s why I don’t bring girls home.”

“Except for one.”

His eyes wandered to you, the subtle surprise spread across his face. In that moment he seemed almost vulnerable. “How do you know?” His gaze lingered on you. The expression on his face appeared rather blank as though he wanted to hide his feelings from you. It was pretty obvious by now that this particular girl must have hurt him deeply.

“Your cousins talk a lot,” you chuckled lightly. Christian’s eyes travelled around the room without aim, avoiding your gaze. He was reluctant to reply. As you noticed how uncomfortable this topic was making him feel, you decided not to probe any further. It was none of your business anyway.

“I told you about the over-controlling girlfriend, didn’t I?” He then said much to your surprise. You nodded your head slowly.

“She tried to dictate my life and to some extent I let her. I thought the feelings were mutual so I tried my best to make her happy and be the person she wanted me to be. I later found out she only used me for clout. She wanted my connections to the industry, not me.”

“I’m sorry,” you mumbled under your breath as you didn’t know what else to respond to this. You couldn’t have guessed from his exterior and the way he was carrying himself. But it was self-centered of you to think you were the only one whose trust was betrayed, the only one who had been hurt. He was no exception to it.

“Don’t look at me like that,” he chuckled affectionately. “How am I looking at you?”

“Like you’re about to cry.”

“I’m not!” You made a grimace giving him a punch for that stupid remark.

“How did you get over her?” “Sex. A lot of it.” “Of course,” you rolled your eyes at him with a laugh. “So you’re playing with people’s heart because you got your own broken?” “Nah, I don’t play them. I’m just having fun. I’m honest with them from the start. I make things clear from the get go. It’s not really my fault if they end up expecting more.” “Well, you’re charming, kind and you treat them well. You can’t be surprised they actually fall for you and want more, can you?” Christian anchored his attention on your face, his eyes unmoving lingering on you. He let the silence take over as if he was waiting for you to say something else. “What? Do I have something on my face?” You blinked at him confused, suddenly feeling self-conscious under his gaze. “What about you?” “What about me?” “Are you falling for me too?“ He asked, his eyes locked with yours. [To be continued...]

What do you guys think Minhee’s answer will be? Are they developing feelings for each other? Please let me know! Looking forward to reading your thoughts!

#christian yu #christian yu scenarios #christian yu imagines #khh imagines #khh scenarios #khiphop scenarios #khiphop imagines #dpr scenarios #dpr imagines #getting off the wrong foot

241 notes · View notes

timextoxhajima · 4 years

Audio

Playlist Feels

*SHORT SERIES

Member: *falls off his chair* juyeon

Genre: BIG ANGST + drama with chaebol/lawyer juyeon

A/N: NOTE THAT THIS IS A TRIGGER WARNING. I can’t include the reason because it’ll be a spoiler BUT THIS IS FICTITIOUS SO DON’T COME @ ME PLEASE

A/N pt 2: there isn’t much juyeon in this chapter so skip it if you just want some juyeon one shots

Links to other parts:

I Never Wanna See You Again

Frustrated (light smut)

Love Somebody (light smut)

Play With Fire (smut)

Stigma

Bourbon

Highway To Heaven (smut)

I Like Me Better

All Time Low

“so much for ‘i love you’.”

“are you sure you want to get on a more-than-twelve-hour flight to freakin’--” sunwoo grabs your passport and flips it open. “Amsterdam?”

you snatch the passport back, shoving it into the pocket of your knee-length coat.

“you ran from your family once...” chanhee looks at you with pleading eyes. “are you sure you want to run from this one?”

looking up from the passport, luggage next to your legs and surrounded by your friends, you scan the big, block letters that spell ‘departure’ across the entrance to the hall.

“i’m not running. i just need to think.”

“the last time you were on a plane, you hurled from the turbulence,” eric scolds. “and it was a three-hour flight.”

you roll your eyes and raise a brow at your friends. they were all just finding ways to convince you stay instead of watching you leave the country just days after you find them jobs that were extremely high-paying.

the calls you made were probably setting off a thousand alarms that would alert both your parents, since you were relying on the contacts you had as a chaebol. it was just a matter of time before they’d figure out that you left the country or something.

“so what if i hurl? i’ll be fine when the plane lands.”

chanhee’s features were strained, and eric sighs, pulling you into a hug and giving you a brotherly rub on your head.

“call us when you get there and tell us when you’re coming back, we’ll come get you.” eric releases you and sunwoo gives you a gently punch to your arm. you nod and look to chanhee, your arms already reaching out to him.

chanhee takes a small step backwards, eyes looking like he was hurt. you knew he was upset with you for blowing things out of proportion with juyeon. if you didn’t try to defend him, the whole argument with juyeon wouldn’t have happened. but it was a fact that he crossed the line, and it had nothing to do with chanhee.

“if i let you hug me, then it means there’s a chance you’re going to run and i’ll never see you again.”

your arms remained stretched out but your head droops to the side, pouting a little and walking towards him regardless.

“i’m not going to run, chanhee,” you wrap your arms around his shoulders. “and even if i do, i’ll come back just to see you guys. you have my word.”

you hear him sigh in resignation and his arms find your lower back. “i’ll hold you to that. i’ll hunt you down myself if you disappear off the face of earth.”

you snicker as you pulled back, constantly swallowing your saliva so you don’t burst into ugly tears.

you settle down in your seat and the passenger next to you greets you kindly. the skies outside the window next to you provided you the warmth and a strange feeling of freedom, but there was so much weight in your heart, you were worried the plane wouldn’t even take off.

you recall the first time you were on a plane. it was a private flight to paris with your parents when you were still a kid. you spent half the time throwing up because of the turbulence.

the second time you were on a plane, it was with eric, chanhee and sunwoo to a nearby country. they watched you hurl out your meals like a fountain and though it might’ve been a little mean and annoying in that point of time, you look back now and realise that all they were trying to do was to make you laugh and get your mind off your motion-sickness.

you wouldn’t be who you were today if it weren’t for them.

had they not dragged you onto a plane, you’d probably still be scared to fly with your motion sickness. but thanks to them, it didn’t matter anymore. it doesn’t matter if you threw up, all you needed to do was think about them and you’ll be fine.

you watch the sunset below the clouds that look like cotton and marshmallows, the constant whirring of the vehicle was slowly but surely getting to your head. the pressure of being in the sky was squeezing the juices out of your brain and making your eyes tear up. your ears were slightly blocked, so blasting music didn’t really help.

you feel the familiar ball of stomach acid push itself up your throat and into your chest, and you barely get the words out to the passenger next to you before she shifts and lets you out.

you watch the half-digested grains of rice and fruit spew out through your lips and into the toilet bowl, the material on your knees soaking up whatever liquid that was on the floor. might’ve been pee, but who cares?

“miss, are you alright?”

“yeah--” you belch out a disgusting scent, a mixture of vomit and food. “i’m okay.”

you grab a handful of tissue and wipe your lips, leaning back on your heels before losing your balance when the plane shakes a little. your back hits the wall of the cabin, and a headache rips through your temples.

you grit your teeth and groans of pain unconsciously pour out through your lips, your hands now pressing into your ear as the pressure in them become physical pain.

“miss! are you okay? do you need any assistance?”

“i’m fine!” you snap back. “it’s just a little... headache--”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“stay with me forever.”

“i can’t pretend you’re not the best thing that’s happened to me.”

“i love you.”

you vision widens and start to focus, but you frown to yourself when you process nothing besides a plain, white ceiling with amber lights lining the edges.

you inhale a deep breath and you give your nerves a moment to find your fingers. you blink so slowly, you were wondering if you were paralyzed or if your brain was just processing it super slowly.

“you’re awake.”

that voice.

turning in search of the source, your eyes catch a glimpse of the room you were in. there was a table in the corner of the room, a television mounted to the wall, and the floor was carpeted with a cream colored rug.

you process the views before you spot an IV drip, and it was hooked up to your left hand. the blanket was riled up to your stomach, and the scent of the room knocks some sense into your thinking.

you were in a hospital ward.

“where am i?” you breathe lightly, shutting your lids and rolling your eyes under to make sure you weren’t in a dream.

“in amsterdam, where else?”

“what date and time is it?” you look behind him and note the pathetic amount of afternoon sunlight spilling through the blinds that were closed.

“i don’t know how that’s going to tell you how long you’ve been here, but you passed out halfway on your flight here. you’ve been in this bed for more than thirty hours.”

you suck in a sharp breath and cover your eyes with one arm, the disgusting scent of medicine and antiseptic making your lungs hurt.

“how did you know i was here?”

dumb question to ask.

“it was a little difficult to ignore the calls you were making to my sub-ordinates and colleagues and partners. adding on the fact that your mother called to scream at me about you getting on a plane here,” your father gets out of the sofa next to your bed and walks around to the table, pouring a glass of water. “i wasn’t very keen on hearing her out until she told me your flight was to amsterdam.”

he brings the glass to you and holds it out.

“it was tricky to pretend that you aren’t my daughter... who also happens to have motion-sickness but still gets on a flight alone.”

you scoff, sitting up and taking the glass only because your throat was killing you. “fun to know that i need to get on a plane to get your attention.”

your father scratches a temple and waits for you to finish the glass of water.

“enough attention for me to cancel my meetings and fly here from croatia. i left the moment the airline called me to tell me my daughter passed out on the flight your mother was telling me about.”

you gulp the last bit of water and hold it to your chest. he gestures for it, and you reluctantly let him take it away from you.

it reminds you of all the times his house staff waited on you and how bad it made you feel. but you were always happy knowing that they were comfortable working in that house.

“so, do i get to know why i had to cancel my meetings to find you here, in a ward?” he lands the cup on the table and refers to the sofa seat next to you.

“solo trip to get away from city life. i simply passed out from the turbulence a long-flight was putting me through.”

he’s probably not going to buy that.

“that’s not very healthy.”

you scoff, lying back down into the bed and running your hand through your hair. “of course it’s not healthy. anymore throwing up and i’ll erode my own digestive system. if only i could fault someone for my throwing up.”

silence.

“so... whose is it?”

“what do you mean ‘whose is it’? i was born with a weak gut, so i guess it’s mine.”

silence.

“i’m not talking about your motion-sickness, y/n. i’m talking about the 15-week foetus inside you.”

the what--

“15-week foetus? what are you--”

oh.

no.

“you didn’t know you were pregnant?”

your heart felt like it was going to explode and a wave of ache rips through your chest.

“if it’s a 15-week-old foetus, shouldn’t you have already missed like two or three periods?”

your fingers find your temples and you shut your eyes tightly. you start to feel your eyes getting wet and your nose turns sour as you desperately try to find any strand of possibility that this wasn’t happening.

“i was... working. i thought it was just the stress--” all of a sudden, you see nothing but juyeon’s face in your head. your eyes were sealed shut but you saw nothing but him.

and now you were carrying his child.

“huh,” your father calmly watches you go through a whole mental breakdown. “you’re not wearing a ring, so i assume the baby’s father isn’t my son-in-law?”

you turn to look at him with tears impairing your vision.

“your mother told me you were engaged over the phone. you can imagine my confusion when you turn up here, on the other side of the planet, alone, pregnant and without a ring.”

this can’t be real.

“get out.”

your father sucks in a sharp breath through his nostrils.

“you can fly back to croatia and tell mother not to poke her nose into this. i’ll deal with it on my own.”

he nods in your peripheral vision, your eyes only staring at an empty space on the ceiling. you shut your eyes and let the tears roll down the sides of your face, curving its way into the crevices of your ears. the sound of the shoes thumping softly against the carpet tells you he’s leaving and you hear the door swing open.

“call me if you need anything. i’m still your father after all.”

and with that, you hear the door shut.

you let yourself sob quietly, the reality sinking into your bones and you swore you could hear your heart beating in your ears. your hands find your abdomen, and you question why the product of your love with him was presented to you not in the form of casual dates and a simpler romance, but a baby, in a world of money you wanted nothing to do with.

you pull yourself together after about an hour of crying, and through swollen eyes, you find your luggage and bags behind the sofa seat your father previously sat on. fumbling around your bag, you were relieved that your phone had not been turned on the entire time since you boarded the plane. it would still be close to full battery.

your home screen becomes flooded with notifications of missed calls. from eric, sunwoo, chanhee, your mother, even your manager, and him.

you swipe away everything and let the phone adjust to the timezone and boot up, and once it was good to go, your first instinct was to call chanhee.

“where have you been?! your flight landed like... a billion years ago!”

“chanhee--”

“you better have a damn good explanation for fucking disappearing off the face of the fucking earth when you literally told me you won’t--”

“i--”

“where are you now, huh?! strutting down some random street in amsterdam thinking about coming back like, never?!”

“chanh--”

“believe me, i WILL get on a plane and fly to amsterdam just to strangle you myself!”

“chanhee, i’m pregnant.”

the other end of the line goes silent and you wonder if he hung up or something.

you hear him breathe into the receiver and that was your cue to finish your story.

“i passed out on the flight and now i’m in a hospital in amsterdam. my father’s in the country because the airline called him about me but i don’t know how long he’s staying,” you pause, bracing yourself to repeat that cursed word reality has decided to offer you. “i’m three months pregnant.”

silence.

you look down at your hands that were absent-mindedly fiddling with the corners of your blanket. your hair was messy and draped over your shoulders. your eyes struggle to remain wide open after the excessive crying in the last hour.

“... does he know?”

“no. even i didn’t.”

“what are you going to do about the baby?”

you purse your lips, pain rippling through you when you realise you had to make a decision that would change your life forever.

“i assume you’re not planning on telling him?”

it was your turn to fall silent.

you don’t want to be a shitty person for hiding this from him, but neither did you want him to have an opinion on what you should do with it.

“i think you should know that he’s been searching high and low for you. sangyeon and jaehyun told us that he’s been to your place and the only thing he hasn’t done is call the bureau director.”

“i’ll tell him after i decide what to do with it.”

“and?”

“i’ll tell him--”

“i know what you’re thinking of doing.”

you feel your facial features strain and compress all into each other, your thumb brushing the skin on your finger where the ring should be.

“you’re thinking of aborting it and telling him right before you get it done, aren’t you?”

he wasn’t your best friend for nothing.

“i know it sucks... the situation you’re in. and i don’t want to be the one who guilt trips you into keeping it just because it’s his or that it’s a life. so forget about him, and think about yourself before you decide to do anything. it’s yours as much as it’s his, and i know you have the means to raise it on your own, both financially and emotionally.”

chanhee’s words crush your last attempt at holding yourself together, and you bury your face into your free hand with the phone held to your ear.

“you’re hurting, and i know there’s nothing i can do to make you feel better besides give you what you need right now, and that’s space and emotional support,” a pause. “so call me when you’ve decided, and i promise i’ll see you soon.”

you sniffle loudly into the receiver, sure that he heard you. nodding to yourself, you thank chanhee and hang up, letting whatever fluids you had left inside you pour out through your eyes.

THE NEXT DAY

“thank you, it was a great stay,” you smile at the hospital receptionist, handing her the black and silver card that your father left behind. it had your name on it, but this was the first time you’ve ever used it.

you promised yourself you’d return the money when you earn it back. you didn’t want them to use this as a hold to keep you by their side.

“the bill’s already been paid by your father, miss,” she returns a bright smile and hands the card back to you.

ugh, one step late.

“in fact, he informed us that he’s booked you a place to stay in a hotel nearby. it’s a five-star hotel so there’s everything you need there, and if you feel uncomfortable or in need of medical assistance, it’s only a five minute drive here from the hotel.”

you provide her a weak service smile as you chuck the card back into your wallet.

the receptionist calls you a cab and sends you on your way to the castle-looking hotel. the hotel staff get your luggage and belongings up to the room while you roam around the lobby and the compound. you find yourself outside the building, now walking along the path next to the river bank.

couples were eating and drinking the evening away, the orange beams from the sun shining down on you and elongating the shadows of the birds that fly past above you in the sun’s light.

you find yourself in a secluded spot where the river opens up to the sea after spending nearly an hour just walking along the water line.

the only source of light around were the street lamps, and the water extends so far out, you couldn’t even see the horizon. you hear someone walk past every now and then and they kindly greet you. the friendly culture here was making you feel so comfortable, you couldn’t help but laugh at chanhee’s worry about you staying here forever.

you pull out your phone and dial for the abortion provider of the hospital you stayed at, and for a second you worry about the medical bills.

but it was quickly washed away once the abortion provider picks up, and you start inquiring about abortion protocols. your eyes travel out to sea as the person on the other end of the line feeds you the information that you were going to need to look over again once you’ve returned to the hotel.

your mind flashes back to the night juyeon proposed to you after you told him about your family. and you truly wonder...

life has a way of putting you in places you were meant to be.

Part 11 (final): Gravity

#timetohajima #angst #sad #lots of sad #im so fucking sad #im not even kidding anymore #lee juyeon #juyeon #the boyz #the boyz juyeon #juyeon fanfics #juyeon fanfic #the boyz fanfic

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whynotwinnie · 4 years

Text

Wounded: a Kylo Ren x OC part 3

VENUS

"X2, can you please watch over the supreme leader, and if there are any irregularities in his heartbeat or oxygen levels come get me."

X2 beeped a yes and you left the operation room with General Hux

"What were you thinking, out of everyone on the field you had to choose Ren to help," he said

"I almost didn't help him but he was going to die I couldn't just leave him out there. And keep your thoughts down he can hear them," you said glancing back into the operation room's window the IV finally worked and he was sedated but you weren't sure what the extent of his powers was.

"He read your mind right?" he said smirking slightly "I know I've worked with him all this time he's been in my mind many times." He touched your coat stained with blood "Is this yours?"

Your hand shot up to your head forgetting about your gash on your head. It wasn't bleeding but the wound wasn't closed.

"I guess it is it will be healed soon."

"You fixed Ren up?"

Oh yeah, the supreme leader almost bled to death in your infirmary.

"Yeah, a blaster shot wound in the abdomen causing internal bleeding, broken ribs that should be mending currently and a really bad concussion."

"Ren doesn't get shot," he said matter of factly

"I don't know who shot him Artimedge I just do my job."

"Alright, no need to catch an attitude Venus I'm just saying something definitely went wrong."

"Well yeah a lot of things went wrong doesn't mean i-"

And then you saw them, six huge masked men dressed in all black. You heard stories of them of what they and the supreme leader do. Your stomach turned as they headed straight to you. You grabbed Artimedge's arm and he pushed you behind him making him some sort of human shield.

"Where is Master Ren girl?" one said to you

"He's resting right now." You surprised yourself your voice came out even and calm even though on the inside you felt like you could cry

"Why didn't you inform anyone that he was taken here." The one speaking broke from the group and approached you. Artimedge didn't move an inch as you were still behind him.

"For the safety of the supreme leader and myself I didn't put his name on the record because if I would they would've came and finished the job. The supreme leader was severely hurt and I'm afraid if I wasn't there he wouldn't be her-"

The knight grabbed your arm and dragged you out from behind Artimedge and pulled you to the operation room and shoved you against the wall. The rest of the knights and Artimedge followed you in the room. X2 beeped wildly.

"Where did you find Master Ren?" he said

"In a trench near the enemy base." now you were definitely crying.

The knight grabbed your jaw and moved it so you were facing to your right he examined your gash and then turned you the opposite direction and then he let go of you. You stared into his mask he turned and looked at the supreme leader as if he spoke to him and then finally spoke after what seemed forever.

"You are the only one that can work Master Ren no one else, there will be two of us at the door at all times you are not to leave this room until Master Ren is healthy, no one in or out." the knight said.

You finally let go of the breath you were holding you lived to see another day.

"You have thirty minutes to get your belongings and to be back here." you stared at him not knowing if you could move or if he was just going to change his mind and kill you.

Artimedge pulled you out of the room and started to drag you to your quarters.

"Venus are you okay? Please say something you look terrible."

"That's not very nice," you muttered

He sighed "You should've just left Ren on the battlefield."

"Please don't reprimand me for doing my job Artimedge. Why are you saying all this stuff wishing the Supreme Leader was dead, aren't you on the same side."

"Ren gets distracted with his own personal matters and frankly it's giving the First Order a bad rep making us look like fools compared to the Rebels."

You finally got to your quarters. Artimedge sat you down on your bed and started packing your clothes. You were thankful that he was there because you were still traumatized by your experience with the Knights of Ren.

You stood up and started helping him "Do you know that knights name?"

"Vircrul, he's sort of the next in command after Ren of course."

You were shaking as you were folding your clothes, Artimedge took the piece of clothing from you and folded it himself and grabbed your hands.

"It's going to be okay Venus, Ren will be fine in a week and then you never have to see him after that or the knights."

You shooked your head, Artimedge was always right in a week you could just go to your normal life. You looked down at your hands still holding on to Artimedge's you didn't want to go back and he knew it. He let go of your hands and grabbed your bag.

"I wouldn't be late Venus." you took a shaky breath and followed him back to the infirmary. Right before you got into the infirmary he handed you your bag and grabbed your face with both hands you both stared at each other until you hugged him he wrapped his arms around you and you both stayed there for a while until you heard footsteps coming from down the hall you let go and gave him a small smile and then you walked into infirmary.

Once you stepped into the operation room you were stopped by one of the other knights. He grabbed the bag that you brought and dumped everything out on the floor.

Are you kidding me? You had to bite down on your tongue.

"He's just making sure that you didn't bring anything to harm Master Ren," Vircrul said suddenly he was nonviolent with you.

If I wanted to kill him don't you think I would've just left him on the battlefield to die. Or killed him when we were alone?

You gave him no response you just started picking up your clothes that were now scattered all across the floor.

"The kitchen is going to send both of your meals here. Three times a day your droid is allowed to assist you." Two of the knights came in holding a recliner chair. "As far as beds go that's the best the infirmary could provide."

You shook your head in confirmation. Of course, after the battle, all the cots were being used you were glad they provided you with the recliner.

Once they left the room X2 came straight to you and you knelled hugging his metal body. X2 was the only familiar thing to you on The Finalizer he always knew how you were feeling and what to do. You were just so worn out from the events of the day, you looked at the supreme leader's body still unconscious before deciding that you were going to take a shower in the small refresher in the operating room.

"X2 please keep an eye out and get me if anything happens, it just going to be a quick shower."

You stepped in the refresher that had a small toilet and a small walk-in shower and quickly undressed knowing your luck he would wake up while you were in the shower you. Once you were finished you checked your head again the gash was now closed but it was still sore. Changing quickly into nightclothes a pair of black loose-fitting pants and a black tank top you were able to see bruises where Vicrul grabbed you. X2 beeped at the entrance of the refresher

His heart rate is rising he is going to wake soon.

You shooked your head and tied your hair up and left and he was in fact moving around the table not quite awake yet. He jerked and woke himself up and you grabbed his shoulders.

"Supreme leader my name is Venus and I am your healer I'm not sure if you remember but you had a blaster shot woun-"

"I remember."

"Are you in any pain or discomfort?"

He didn't speak.

"Are you hungry they are going to bring dinner soon I believe."

"What's the time?"

"It is currently 7:51."

He started to sit up despite his wound on his stomach.

"Supreme leader you can't go anywhere until you are healthy again the Bacta shot is going to help speed up the process but ultimately you just need time."

He ignored you.

"Your knights said you are to stay here until you're ready."

"I am their Master not the other way around nurse so if you can just shut up that would be wonderful."

You stopped talking immediately and watched him rise wincing as the bandages started spotting with blood. He was almost off the table when Vicrul walked in with someone from the kitchen staff holding with two trays.

"What are you doing girl I told you he is to stay here and rest. Why is he trying to get up?"

"I told him he didn't allow me to-"

"Shut up girl that's all I need to know about you of course you couldn't do the one simple task I asked of you."

Crying for the second time today you looked at the supreme leader and he was staring right back at you. What do you want from me? you thought knowing he could hear. A silent plea hoping he could save you from his knight that was yelling at you.

"You worthless girl you shouldn't even be a healer you are irresponsible and frankly not skilled enough I am going to see it immediately that you are terminated and kicked off at the next planet we stop at."

That was the end of the line for you as much as you hated conflict and yelling you knew your worth as a healer and you knew that you are the best at what you do the best on the Finalizer and probably in the galaxy.

"If I was so irresponsible and incompetent would I have saved the Supreme Leader? Who else do you know that could've done that or would have been willing to do it as I have? Where were you and your stupid knights to protect him? Isn't that your job?."

The knight took a step back so he was not so close and looked back at the Supreme Leader you looked at the Supreme Leader and he nodded but not to you, to the knight that was just yelling at you. With that Vicrul turned back to you and cocked his head to the side as if something was wrong with you and then turned and left.

With that, the Supreme Leader laid back down. There were tears still coming out of your eyes still very confused to what has happened. X2 beeped grabbing your attention.

"Are you done crying because I'm not sure if you noticed but I am now bleeding."

You looked at him and wiped your eyes, grabbing a pair of scissors you cut the bandages that were now bloody not talking to him while you replaced them with clean ones. Once you was done you heard his stomach grumble and that amused me somehow because someone as powerful as the Supreme Leader still needs to eat.

You stared at the plate brought to you before Vicrul started yelling and then you stared at the Supreme Leader.

"Do you want to see what they brought you for dinner? Or are you okay."

No response.

That shit was going to get real old real quick

You walked over to the metal tray you noticed it was 2 different meals, one that the infirmary calls soft diet for people who are injured semi-badly and they cant handle anything heavy so the vegetable and lentil soup that came with a roll was his. The other seemed like a feast compared to his a bowl of white rice with some type of chicken curry on another plate some flat circle bread and even something chocolatey for dessert.

You grabbed his bowl of soup and walked towards him he was staring at the ceiling

"Did you want it? Its vegetable soup."

He wrinkled his nose in disgust and you had to smile a little. The Supreme Leader didn't like vegetables.

"There is something else if you want it?"

You turned and grabbed the other plate and pulled a small table to the Supreme Leaders side, You put the food on the table and slowly started to incline the hospital bed the supreme leader he wasn't sitting all the way up but he definitely wasn't laying down either.

You grabbed a chair from the corner of the room and put it next to his bed and sat on it.

"May I assist you with your meal?" You asked softly

He shook his head, yes and you exhaled.

Finally, he's working with me.

"Its just food don't be so dramatic," he said

"Well I was just trying to save your life and I almost got killed twice so maybe I will be a little dramatic."

You put some of the curry chicken on the rice and mixed it up it was surprisingly hot still considering it stayed out when you were getting yelled at and when you were bandaging the supreme leader. You blew on the food before putting it to his mouth and he was just staring at you. His eyes were filled with disbelief and you were just confused.

"Are you okay?" You asked body still stretched out towards him one hand holding the spoon and one hand cupped under the spoon just in case some fell

He responded by eating the food.

#adam driver #bensolo #darkside #general hux #the last jedi #jedi #kylo ren #kylo x y/n #kylo x oc #kylo ren fanfiction #kylo #kylo ren imagine #star wars fanfiction #star wars #The Force Awakens

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a-trying-writer · 4 years

Text

cap stuff, because i want some happy juice that im happy to make for myself.

as i often wrote before, cap loves to pet kosch, but she also loves physical attention herself. no one knows why, not even herself, but she enjoys it. sometimes she purrs or sighs and/or sleeps on the person petting her. racter does this often to get her to stop having anxiety for a time, much to duncans chagrin.

cap is definitely a big eater, but she doesnt have an iron stomach like gobbet. still, the two do challenge each other over meals, and sometimes tries to pick each others meals, like uneaten fries or wings. more often than not, this leaves to a utensil fight, from chopsticks to forks and spoons. more often than not, no one wins, because they had spilled their meals.

cap enjoys challenging is0 in the matrix, even tho she knows that is0 is a master compared to her. she is kinda envious that is0 has huge servers in her room to do whatever she can, while cap has to rely on outdated software that she does try to tune up, despite the risks of it breaking. cap’s computer is also just a brick, but its still p useful. is0 doesnt mind helping her update it, tho some of the pieces dont fit the casing of the computer, so they have to do some further digging.

cap sucks at writing haikus, but she enjoys listening to gaichu recite them and japanese poems and books. tho she doesnt speak the language, she learns about some phrases and how they are valued in his culture. on a different note, being aware that he needs to eat people to sustain himself, she does feel very uncomfortable by it, due to her childhood trauma as the game states for seattle, which applies to her, but she does sometimes help hunt down the worst kind of people for him. otherwise, she minds her own business and stays away from that.

being siblings, cap and duncan are p cool with each other, sometimes getting into fist fights to practice, tho she is much smaller and lighter than him, ofc. he still helps her get better, even if she cant get the hang of it properly, buts its only for her to be safe than sorry. they also watch trideo programs together when they are bored, and joke around about it. esp around action flicks and dramas. (cap hates dramas funny enough, so she only watches them with duncan.)

cap enjoys hanging around heoi, to talk to some of the residents, or party in club 88. she is an awful dancer and singer, but its a blast. she also helps reliable matt with his drones by fixing them, thanks to racter teaching her. and while she doesnt approve of him using a chip to keep up a facade, she lets it be as long as it doesnt cause any harm. she also jokes around by calling him “beautiful” in return for all the times he said it to her.

since she is a decker much like is0, cap spends time around max law to scan through his wares, while bantering with him. she tends to forget he is a lot older than she thinks, so she tends to treat him like a younger brother or kid, before remembering that lil fact. they also talk about the journey to the west novels, and various adaptions, like video games, because of his boat that is referenced to the monkey king.

cap is p chill with ka fai family, and as i said before, enjoys partying in the club. tho, sometimes, if she becomes too rowdy, henry picks her up and drags her out where duncan waits for her to bring her back to the dowager empress. duncan is never surprised, but is often disappointed.

on a funny note, cap is frightened by both kindly and bao, so she never dares to enter the mahjong palor. the same could be said with crafty xu, but for a different reason. she adores xu, but the smell of sage gives her migraines and reminds her of her time in prison. otherwise, she does like to take a sneak peek at some of the books xu sends to her, and often talks about gobbet’s particular ways of cooking.

cap finds ambrose the most mysterious, given that what he says about himself, may or may not be entirely true. but at least he helps her and the crew a lot by supplying them with medicine. ofc, since she is sometimes up to shenanigans that leaves her with a few injuries, he is the one she always goes to, or has to go to, no matter how much she tries to assure the crew that she is all right. esp when she gets sick.

on a side note, tho it isnt canon to the game, but in my stories, cap often speaks to lucky strike, because of their relations to racter, and cap’s own past. there are some things lucky keeps secret, esp about bleak, caps old friend that went missing, if not had passed. its also hard for cap to hide that she finds lucky very attractive, but she believes its because some of her mannerisms reminds her of racter. thing is, she always has been attractive to the dangerous ones, much like how she was attracted to some of her exes in the past.

least to say, cap never really had a healthy relationship. but it is what it is, living the kind of life she has.

there are some things about lucky and cap that i might explore in the future, as i feel there is a lot of potential there, esp given her attitude in srd. but i need more dialogue refs of lucky to capture her character for them. im not too big of a fan to get back into srd, but ill be glad to do it for those refs, and other things, so i can get a better idea on how to write her. but this is a huge if.

[maybe ill write some rac/cap/lucky bits, because im starting to ship lucky and ract, but i deeply loathe the love triangle trope. and i never like the idea of cheating relationships, plus, ract did say that leaving their old crew made lucky hate his guts to the point that she was howling for blood. im not one to write unhealthy relationships unless there is a point to it. i also keep thinking its canon for some reason, but racter cant connect with someone like that, tho i do think its entirely possible for him to had slept with a few people, lucky included... hm. i guess it depends on how i feel about it... sometimes, tho, i feel like im obligated to write it too. like, is this what people want? i wont lie, i did touch up on this sort of thing before, but only between lucky and cap, but it was entirely consensual between cap and ract to allow her to spend time with lucky. and cap is something of a saucy individual. im okay with poly/open relationships, only because its the best alt than cheating couples and stupid love triangles... tho, in this case, i assume lucky nor racter connect with people like that. well, i appreciate any thoughts about this, tbh. i know i wrote about it before, this sort of thing, but what are others thoughts on this case? will it be okay for me to leave the relationship just between racter and cap, or put lucky into the picture as well, given their history? or maybe just keep lucky as a side character that is not afraid of speaking her mind to cap, about how things go in heoi and how racter may just leave her like he did before.

honestly speaking, id much rather let racter deal with cap only, instead of getting into something intense with lucky. ive read too many stories about unprompted hate kisses and rebounds, and i want to do something that isnt that. i just worry ill disappoint people... tho i have no reason as to why i do. i just feel that this is something i *have* to do, if that makes sense.

sigh i rambled on for too long. sorry. i just dont want to write any sort of hate s-x based things. it bothers me a lot. idk.]

#i didnt mean to ramble on into that #but i do wonder what do others think about that last bit.#am i allowed to just do what i want?#i never want to seem like im bashing on characters for stupid reasons #because i grew up like that through some fandoms.#im tired of being petty.#i just... want to break that mold im so used to #but i wanna do something that makes me happy and comfortable with.#idk sorry.#im probably not making any sense.#hmph.

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