#homie was like ohhh ok now I see that one with this man with a black sweater and blue hair

[seokwoosmole]

May the heavens forever bless Thea from Barnes & Noble her name's not Thea but to protect her privacy and to protect my identity if she somehow happens to see this her name will be Thea for going above and beyond to secure a Hongjoong version of the new ATEEZ digipacks. May your faves never disband and may you always pull your biases' photocards.

[arileartist]

Free! Boyfriends protecting their s/o from a creep/bully -part 1(Haru, Makoto and Rin)

Enjoyyyy ❤️

Haru

B: Hey there kiddo! Whatcha got there~

Y/n: (whispering and wrapping your arm around Haru's) Haru.. That guy is creepy…

B: (Walks up to you two) Wassup mate! Where you two goin?

Haru: None of your business…

B: aww, cmon! Let this cool guy join yall as well! Right? (Tries to poke your cheek)

Y/n: hands off please

Haru: (eyes the man scarily)

B: Heyy! Don't be like that now~ I'm just a poor ol chap, let's be friends ey?

Haru and y/n: No thanks( keep walking away)

B:(grabs your arm) C'mon brooo let's click some pics together? Just your friendly neighbourhood homies, am I right?

Haru: (stops and you quickly whip the man's hand away) You're bothering y/n. Stop it.

B: Y/n is it? Such a cute name for such a cute lil fella~ (eyes you)

Y/n: Ok that's enough, you're a fucking pervert and nothing more

B: Dang, this one's got a sharp t-

Haru:( Throws a fistful at the man's face, hitting him dead on the nose, causing blood to shoot out) Look at y/n once again, and your eyes will be next

(The creep passes out and Haru quickly calls the police, who reach there within minutes, and arrest the man. After the police leave, it's just you and Haru again)

Haru: y/n? You ok??

Y/n:(crying softly, you bury your face into Haru's torso) I'm…I'm so.. Scared…

Haru:( wrapping his arms around you and walking with you) He's gone now…it's ok…I'll protect you

Y/n: (you sob softly and hug him tight) Please…stay with me…

(Haru hums your favourite song as he holds your hand gently and pats your head, embracing you in a much needed, comforting warmth…)

Makoto

(You spot your bully in a corridor, as you and Makoto walk through the hallways of your college)

Makoto: y/n? Is something wrong?

Y/n:(whispering) that guy…he's the one who…picks on me a lot…

Makoto: ohhh, don't worry y/n, I'm here now. He won't do anything to you.

Y/n: (you shift closer to Makoto)

B: Oh hello there~ who do we have here?

B:Y/n~ and who's this with you? Your boyfriend??

Y/n: Jealous that you can't pull one?

Makoto: (elbows you) Sorry, I don't suppose we've met

B: Eh, that doesn't matter. But tell me. Why would you date y/n here? Like look at him/her. So nerdy lol.

Makoto: Who I date is my choice, and y/n is perfect as he/she is.

Y/n:(smiles at Makoto, and a rage builds up inside you) Thank you mako~

B: pfff- this one? Perfect?? Bro you gotta have the worst vision if you think that. Look at em! (Grabs your specs) how many fingers~

Y/n: oh no you didn't-

Makoto: (places a hand on your shoulder and smiles at you. Then sternly looks at the guy) please give back y/n's specs.

B: hmm since you asked so nicely~

Y/n: (you put your hand out, expecting him to place them on your palm) That was nice of you

B: (smiles and throws it into the garbage can)~Then you can catch it yourself!

Y/n:( you gasp and launch yourself towards your glasses, and thankfully catch them before they fall into the garbage can) Whew! That was a close call…

Makoto: (grabs the collar of the bully and picks him up, dangling in the air) That's not very nice of you now…

Y/n: I've kinda had enough of you, why not finish this game today?

B: Ngh! Let me down or I'll report you to the principal for trespassing!

Y/n: (winking at Makoto) Sure! You do know there's cameras here sooo if you want the principal to check them…then…oh wait! They also captured you "accidentally" throwing my glasses into the bin…tsk tsk tsk.. What a shame if the principal sees that right?

Makoto: (hangs the collar of the bully onto a high hook) Y/n? Don't you think he looks good as a decoration there?

Y/n:(laughing) oh yes that's perfect lmaooo!!

B: hey!! Get me down!! You'll pay for this!!

Y/n:(tying his shoelaces together) yes yes short stuff, it's ok, we know that you have anger issues cuz your size doesn't sustain the amount of steam you release, how about chill….a little…pfff-

Makoto: (lets out a snicker, then inches close to the bully, looking at him dead in the eye and smiling) Jokes aside…I get one more complaint from y/n about you, and I'll drag you into the deepest depths of any water body you swim in next…

Y/n: (laughing) Cmon mako! We have other stuff to do~

B: ….

(You and Makoto walk off, laughing and hugging. Meanwhile, your bully tries to unhook himself from the wall. He manages to do it after a while, as his collar rips and he falls down in an angry heap. As he gets up and tries to chase after you, he trips on his tied shoelaces and falls face first into the garbage can)

Rin

(*Cracks knuckles* this will be fun :) )

(You and Rin are walking along the narrow Street, trying to get home faster so you can relax alone together. However, someone is following you as you notice…that someone is also awfully familiar)

Y/n: C/n(insert the name of the person who you'd punch the lights out of)?? What are you doing here??

Rin: Hm? Who's this?

Y/n: The guy in my class that kept bothering me. What's up? Why did you follow me here after college?

C/n: Y/n~what do you mean~ you know that I love you , don't you?

Rin: (shooting him a displeased look) Oi, don't you know that y/n has a boyfriend??

C/n: yeah, that would be me hehehe( walks towards y/n)

Y/n: back off bud, I don't like you. I made it obvious enough

C/n: Nahh don't be like that. This guy? Pff- what can he do? He's just a big ol "just for show". I can protect you better lol, now come, let's go out-

Rin: (grabs his collar and glares into his eyes) Listen here.. If I see you around y/n, there will be consequences, which I won't be responsible for. Don't tell me I didn't warn you…

Y/n: Don't worry c/n, I'm sure you'll find someone better, someone who loves you too, but I'm already taken. So please, now if you'll excuse us.

(You and Rin leave him and continue walking down the path, but you hear footsteps running towards you from behind, and you quickly warn Rin)

Y/n:(jumping to one side, dodging c/n's hold) What the heck?!

C/n: Okay so then have this guy fight me. I'll give up if he beats me.

Y/n: don't bring him into this. I'll fight you if you want

Rin: (walking towards him) Alright. Heh, let's see whatcha got then.

Y/n: Really?

Rin: He wants it?

C/n: Hehe! I'll beat your ass eas-

Rin: (trips him with a sweep kick, and then gives him two powerful punches on his face) You were saying?

Y/n: (recording the entire scene, just in case)

C/n:(groans) heh..

C/n: (kicks Rin from behind, causing him to growl in pain) now's my chance to run…ugh…I should give up…

C/n: (hissing into Rin's ear) oh, and you better take good care of y/n…Or I'll make sure next time I'm prepared for you

Y/n:(You rush to Rin's aid, now carrying a wooden bat you found nearby in your hand, going for a strike, but c/n runs way too fast, throwing Rin off over a small patch of broken glass) YOU LITTLE-

Rin: (Tries to avoid falling into the patch, but still gets cut by a few pieces of glass) GGAAAHH!!

Y/n: (picks him up and helps him balance on you. You help Rin walk and you both reach home after a few minutes of struggle)

Y/n:(quickly calls a doctor and pushes Rin into the shower, first aid kit in hand)... Rin…I'm so lost..

Rin: (fiddling with your fingers) tch…don't worry y/n.. That guy got lucky…

Y/n:(washes off the dirt and filth when you spot blood on his hair) Rin….. Oh.. No….

Rin: what is it??

Y/n:(starts to tear up) Your head…it's bleeding..

Rin: (touches his head and looks at his hand, blood stained on it) Ahh fuck.. It's not much though…will heal…

Y/n: (starts to cry softly) …. I'm sorry…

Rin: (holding your cheek gently and wiping away a tear) hey…shhh…I'm fine! See??(stands up straight, though he can't move much. He immediately falls down on the chair)

Y/n: (doesn't say anything, just helps Rin clean himself and takes him out into the living room, waiting for the doctor to show up)

Rin:... Hey? Are you just going to sit there like that?

Y/n: (shaking your head) Please…just…Let me be…

Rin: (shifts closer to you and kisses your forehead) Y/n…c'mon.. It's not your fault…

Y/n: you're so right…. You shouldn't have accepted his dumb challenge…

Rin: (giggling) Hey so now I'm the one at fault?

Y/n: (breaking down into tears again, but you hug Rin tightly) Stupid…. Idiot…. I love…. So much…. Please…. Never…..again!!

Rin: (gently runs his hand through your hair, smiling) I love you too y/n…and I'll protect you from anyone who tries to hurt you..

(Soon, the doctor arrives and picks out the glass that went into Rin's skin. He praised you for being quick in action and using first aid, as well as keeping the shards in place to prevent more bleeding. He operates on Rin for some time, and then finally concludes the visit by giving you some painkillers, antibiotics, and applying dressings on Rin's injuries. You text all your friends about the incident and make sure that c/n received a punishment for his actions. After a while, you are sitting next to Rin, tending to him, as he tells you that you're the most important thing to him, and he'll do anything to protect you….)

[qwerty-keysmash]

tmagp episode 1 live thoughts

ohoho i cannot wait for you to be terrible in my ears again alexander j newall

NEW INTRO NEW INTRO

jesus christ that is some intense intro music

computer?? noises???

addiction to vitamin d asjdashdf

""big milk"" im crying

ok i love these two already they are hilarious

is he leaving? :(((

aww he iss :(((((

THE BANTER I LOVE THEM

lena sounds like an asshole

this is a whiplash from tma ep 1 ngl

ok so theyve got some code or something that doesnt work??

that loud fake HEYYYYYYYY sfahj

...was the cake black forest??

is gwen the bouchard??

alice is already my favourite

so how is this one being recorded? obviously its not tapes

oh i love sams accent

"you can ignore that" so thats going to be relevant later, got it

a FLOPPY DRIVE

WINDOWS 95

PREDECESSOR TO WINDOWS 95

incidents...... spooky incidents mayhaps?? 0.0

they ARE spooky!!

DOLLS COMMA WATCHING VS DOLLS COMMA HUMAN SKIN ADGHAKDHAKD

they really have just reinvented smirke's 14

ohhhhhh it'll read out the cases so now we have STATEMENTSSS

a "chatter case" sounds so much funnier than statements lol

norris, chester, and agustus asdhjasdfajsk

OHHH SHIT NORRIS IS ALEX

IS NORRIS MARTIN??

WAIT DOES THAT MEAN THE OTHERS ARE JON AND ELIAS

FHASUOFIGASUHDKJNFJAMFGNAK

ok focus on the actual statement, blue

dont go in the spooky graveyardddd noooo

ah hello violins in the background, how i have missed you

the strangerrrrrr

of course its not arthur you dumbass

who tf is sending emails this poetic

oh hello gwen

ohh so shes actually good at her job, nice

fuck lena all my homies hate lena

aww i like gwen, hope shes not evil

FUCK LENA ALL MY HOMIES HATE LENA

mmmm but can she resign

oh she wants to climb the ranks, i see

poor sam, man just wanted to make small talk

ALICE AGJKSHAD

poor colin tho

THEYRE SO AWKWARD ITS KILLING ME

aw gwen and sam bonding

"the awful terrible thing" shes straight up asking about that origin story 2 seconds in lmao

JON JON JON AHDSGJKHSKVDAJFVSUYED

MAGNUS INSTITUTE????????

oh this is like a reddit forum or something

NOOO DONT GO CHECK IT OUT

well at least hes alive???

paranoid?? 👀

ok so a fire 20 years ago burnt the magnus institute

THE ARCHIVEEEEE

spooky symbols??? suspicious stains??????? oh im so invested

yep all that digital technology do be malfuctioning

you're paranoid? have you tried stalking your coworkers, ive heard that can help

oop hes getting doxxed

MAGNUS THEME IN THE BACKGROUND?????

OH NOOOOOO HES DEAD HES SO DEAD

EYES 👀👀👀

this is just your average reddit thread tbh

BLAST FROM THE PAST?????????

ok so jon is chester and martin is norris, so elias must be agustus

lol, going drinks at 6.30am

theyre exes haha, jongeorgie who??

oh shes smart fr

awwwwww

COLIN KNOWS RED ALERT

so the computers are listeninggggg

SO GOOD GOING TO NEXT EP NOW

[wearequeer-andwearehere]

i have been experiencing some Gender Confusion and i don't necessarily expect you to help but i thought it might help to put it down to someone so hhhh ^^;

so i have identified as a trans man for a while almost two years now. there were times in between where i had uncertainties and such but i am almost nearly sure that my gender is either male or at least male aligned. BUT at the same time this entire time seeing genderfluid or nonbinary characters gives me a lot of euphoria??? and i guess if i was genderfluid i would fluctuate between male and nonbinary genders but at the same time i feel weird about iding as genderfluid or genderqueer because i keep feeling like anything BUT binary trans man would just be iding as Girl Lite in some way. that one's probably just internalised transphobia tho and hhhhh i am just confused

hey dude yea i’m here!! sorry it took me so long to get to this ask high schools kicking my ASS

genderfluid doesn’t necessarily mean between male and nonbinary, it just means ur gender is Fluid. ur gender could be switching between different like, percentages of male or smth. like if ur gender changes, regardless of how it changes, u can be genderfluid!!

ohhh yea dude i feel you tbh. yea internalised transphobia sucks ass but u can’t let it beat u!!! fuck that shit bro it doesn’t know what it’s talking about

if u say ur not a girl ur not a girl. full stop. if u id as genderfluid that doesn’t make u ANY less valid as a trans person, okay?u r NOT girl lite, u are trans. get that into ur head mate. ur validddddd!!!!

honestly just try out the label if u wanna. it’s not a huge permanent decision u can jsut try it on see how u feel like trying on a shirt in a dressing room before buying it. just take a day and be like “ok. i’m genderfluid!” go about ur day make breakfast go for a walk go to work see with that in the back of ur mind, see how it feels!!! see if it feels good or not!

ur valid and i love u homie

lmk if u wanna talk about anything else!! send me asks if u wanna

sending love <333 hope i could help!!!

[breanime]

Bre’s Boys Preference: How They React to Another Person Checking You Out

Caspian X: He tries to play it off, his displeasure at the other man’s attentions to you, but you can see it on his face. If he’s especially unhappy, he’ll put an arm around you as you walk, or kiss the top of your head as you talk, just subtly showing that you’re with him, and that he’s with you, and if he senses even a hint of discomfort from you, he won’t hesitate to step in. 

Logan Delos: Like, he gets it... You’re hot as hell; he stares at you all day long. And also, it’s Logan--he is eye candy personified, so he understands that you’re gorgeous and people are going to check you out, but he’s also like “she’s with ME”, so Logan will put a hand on your ass while the person is checking you out, and when the person starts getting uncomfortable, Logan will turn and toss him a wink...because he’s a little shit.

Billy Russo: Ohhhhh, he does not like that shit at ALL. His dark eyes are narrowed as he watches the guy watch you, and the more he stares, the angrier Billy gets. If he’s at an event and has to maintain a certain image, than he’ll settle for just keeping you close, maybe making a point to touch you a little more to show that you were with him. But if it’s just on the street, and his patience has reached it’s max, Billy is going to straight up look the guy in the eye, stalking over to him like the freaking panther he is, and calmly, but lowly ask “you got a problem?” And the offender would deny any problem and scurry off. Billy, however, takes note of what direction he goes off in and memorizes his face for later use...

Jax Teller: Cocks an eyebrow, smirks, swaggers right up to the guy and says: “You know it’s rude to stare, bro”. The guy will probably try to save face, but Jax ain’t having it. He’ll tell the guy to keep his eyes to himself, or he’ll have to deal with Jax. All the while, he never stops smirking down at him. 

Angel Reyes: “Yo, you got a problem? What you lookin’ at, homie?” Walks over to the guy in three big steps, gets all in his face. “Nah, nah, don’t try to walk away now, I saw you lookin’ at my girl, wassup?” Angel is NOT letting it go, like, he’s understanding (to a point) in a quick, cursory glance, but he hates when guys straight up stare at you, undressing you with their eyes. He doesn’t bother making it a point that you’re with him, he straight up questions the guy as to what his problem is. “Ok, well, on your way out, don’t forget to apologize.” he says, glaring over at him. The guy stammers out an apology to Angel, and Angel laughs. “Nah, not to me--to her.”

Coco Cruz: He’s immediately on edge. His whole body tenses up, and anyone within a mile’s radius can feel the shift in the air as Coco stares at the guy staring at you. Think of a cat with it’s tail up and all the hairs standing up--that’s Coco. He glares, unblinking, at the guy for several moments before the guy takes his eyes off of you and notices. Then the dude is backtracking quick, trying to pretend he was looking past you or getting out his phone and looking away. Depending on his mood, Coco might just drape an arm around your shoulder and continue to glare at the guy while you go on about your business, or he might go over to the guy and get in his face. “Yo, you keep lookin’ at my girl, it’s startin’ to piss me off, homie. We got a problem?” Either way, you’re getting f***** that night when you get home. 

Miguel Galindo: He’ll arch an eyebrow, turning his entire body to watch the guy watch you. He’s actually a little amused, like, this guy is staring at you like you’re a Goddess--and you are, but you have no idea that the guy even exists. He’ll watch the guy for a while before walking over to you, and he’ll press a soft kiss to your cheek as he puts his hand on your waist, and when he does, he flashes both the fancy watch on his wrist, and the sterling silver gun on his hip. The next time he looks up, the guy is gone. Miguel will make eye contact with Nestor, who will shake his head and smile, and as the day goes on, Miguel keeps count of all the envious looks he gets from men because he--and no one else--has you on his arm. 

Nick Amaro: Yes, Nick is a detective. Yes, he is a professional. Yes, he is a father... But he’s also a Crazy Jealous Guy. So when he notices guys staring at you (and oh man, he notices), he tries to keep it together, he really does. But he hates the idea of men looking at you as an object, and he hates the fact that they’re probably thinking dirty thoughts about the woman he loves. So Nick will usually stay close to you, glaring over at anyone who stares for too long. Sometimes he’ll look over at the guy and just ask “you need something, man?” and that will get him to go away. Other times, Nick will just loudly point out that he’s a cop in a totally casual comment, and that gets the guys to scatter. 

Johnny Tuturro: He’s a tie between amused and annoyed. Like, he gets that he’s with a fine ass woman, and he can’t blame people for staring--hell, he did his share of staring at you before you were a couple--but it rubs him the wrong way when people are staring too hard. But Johnny has to deal with a lot of violence and nonsense in his job, so his solution is simple: just be there. He’ll stay with you, enjoying your company with his arm around you, making you laugh and keeping you close, and usually that deters the starers. Either way, he gets to put his hands on you, and he’s always down for that. 

Rio: Ohhh. The King of Pettiness is amused. He stands with his hands in front of him (you know what stance I’m talking about), with his head titled a bit to the side and a smirk on his lips. Rio knows you’re a beautiful woman, he knows guys (and girls) are gonna check you out, but most importantly--he knows that you’re his, and that you’re loyal to him. So he ain’t worried. After a while, though, he can’t help but show off. Like, he has you. He played the game of love, and he WON. He got you! So Rio will swagger over to his, his steps calm and cool, and just stand in front of you. As he talks to you, his voice low and intimate, he’d reach up and caress your face--just a soft, possessive gesture that would make anyone watching now that you were off-limits. Of course...the tats and general look of “don’t fuck with me” he has also helps make his point, TBH

*******************************************************************************************

Thanks for reading! Please let me know what you think! Also, I conned the term “Bre’s Boys” myself, and I’m proud of it lol. Also--taglist ppl, can you let me know if you got a notification for this or if you just saw it on my blog?

Everything Taglist: @sweetybuzz25​  @mrsjaxtellerfan​  @rhabakoli​  @encounterthepast​ @realduckvader​   @justvnash​ @knowles-morgan  @ateliefloresdaprimavera @evanlys19  @nyxxnoxx​ @carlaangel86  @luminex3 @jigsawlover10  @gollyderek @otomefromtheheart  @lexxierave @crushed-pink-petals  @amethyst09​ @falsehopesndreams @a-dorky-book-keeper @witchygagirl

[tracle0]

WIP Bops Tag

So I got tagged for.... two music/listening related games in the span of two days so I will. Do both in one to save myself idk making another post lmao

First one: I think you just list things you’ve been listening to. Maybe the last ten things you listened to? I don’t know man. Tagged by the wonderful @kaatiba​ thank you boo 

I have been listening to...

Cloud Cult - I stand by the fact that Cloud Cult 500% have the best bops for apparently all my wips. ‘Time Machine Invention’ is peak Leon, don’t try and tell me otherwise. ‘It’s Your Decision’ gives me big Percival vibes. ‘Good Friend’ apparently works for every single WIP I have because I write about friends too much.

Night Vale - I missed Night Vale ok. I’ve listened to it all already, but I wanted to hear the Strexcorp arc again, and the liveshow and Carlos man. Carlos. 

I’ll Follow You Into The Dark - isolated song, but I have been listening to it over and over again, because it’s somehow playing my heart strings rather than a guitar. I am obsessed with this song. I learnt it on the ukuele as soon as I could. Major Mika vibes. Made me realise ‘ohhh he’s Catholic ain’t he’ and also made me figure out his friendship with Lynne more. Thanks, song.

Vienna Teng - someone else mentioned her recently, and I went ‘oh yeah I used to listen to her I should do that again’ the only memory I have of hearing her songs is. Not good. So I’m trying to get other memories down lmao.

I need to listen to...

Jake Parker Plagorised My Book which is a very cheerful subject. Quick run-down; Jake Parker is the creator of the yearly Inktober challenge. He plagorised the book of a black artist. I figured I should understand the Drama and then decide what I’ll do in October if not Inktober. 

Okay that’s like five, good enough. Next tag game;

Rules: Share some songs that have inspired your WIP or characters, then tag some people to play! - tagged by @albatris​ thanks homie and I’ve decided I’m going to jump around between WIPs becuase I want to. 

So first off I feel like the songs that first made me go ‘oh I could make a story out of this’ - DIAS spawned from ‘Hopeless Opus’ by Imagine Dragons. I got the idea for like. Two characters who were seperated for some reason, both regretting something, and went ‘okay! How.’ and my brain spat out Leon and Ant.

Whereas wip4 sort of spawned from both ‘On Melancholy Hill’ by Gorillaz, obviously, and also ‘Light a Roman Candle With Me’ by fun. And I cannot tell you at all why this story spawned from these songs. I think it was mostly... for Melancholy Hill, it gave me isolation vibes, and Roman Candle was more... a desperate reach for connection. wip4 has a focus on friendship. I guess that works? 

DIAS again - ‘The Cave’ by Mumford and Sons is. Peak DIAS, not gonna lie. I have officially storyboarded out an entire animatic that is just the entire plot of DIAS to this song. Every verse sort of follows each act of DIAS and uhh

So make - your sirens song and sing - all you want I will not hear what you have to say

I can’t say why because major spoilers, but that lyric. Fits. Very well. 

I mentioned ‘Time Machine Invention’ by Cloud Cult being a major Leon song, because it is, so I’ll talk about that here; Leon gets blown up at one point, and loses his leg. This, along with the fact he thinks Ant is dead, makes him Very Depressed. Vincent comes along like ‘hey dickhead stop being depressed’ except said in a slightly nicer way, and gives him a vote of confidence he needs to get up and try and fix one of the problems he has, that being the leg. 

If we give this moment our fullest attention, we’ll just keep moving forward, with no need for going back.

Which is honestly, just really good life advice, but is also kinda Leon finally starting to let go of the guilt he has over possibly killing Ant and starting to live life without any new regrets. 

wip4 again because this is getting long but I still have things to talk about; ‘Turn The Lights Off’ by Tally Hall is big It vibes, and I cannot tell you how but it does. I’m delighted to put ‘Holding Onto You’ by Twenty One Pilots as a major Keaton song, for the simple reason that Holding Onto You has tried to be a wip song for EVERY SINGLE wip, but it finally actually fits. Heck,

I’m taking over my body, back in control, no more shotty,  I bet a lot of me was lost,  t’s uncrossed and i’s undotted

is like. The first verse, and is also major Keaton being like ‘WOW WHAT THE HELL I WASLITERALLY DEAD UM WHAT’ and also the entire struggle against It. Fun times. 

‘Hello, My Old Heart’ by The Oh Hello’s is a Big Percival Mood, and I can’t really explain why - extreme protectiveness over himself and trying to save himself??? Maybe. Uhh. I’ll give you an Abby song and then done with wip4 - ‘Icicles’ by The Scary Jokes fits her freakishly well. I just found out the artist is nonbinary, which is cool, but I’ll talk about that another day. 

I can only be forgiven if I'm givin' myself up to you  On a silver serving tray  Must I bare myself to the stabbing of your knife and gnashing teeth  While our lovely company appears so entertained?

I think Abby recognises that she is in the wrong for a lot of the story, but also thinks that admitting this to Percival would sort of... reverse their roles? That he’d want revenge and would inflict the years of pain she’d put him through onto her. He wouldn’t but she doesn’t realise that. So ‘must I bear myself to the stabbing of your knife and gnashing teeth’ is just. What she assumes she’d have to deal with. 

Okay! Final song and it’s for DIAS and also for Simon cause we’re talking about villains okay. He’s got ‘The Greatest Show’ but specifically the cover by Panic! At The Disco. Simon is, to quote the lovely Summayah, ‘a dramatic fuck’ and this song is dramatic as fuck. 

Don't fight it, it's comin' for you, runnin' at ya It's only this moment, don't care what comes after Your fever dream, can't you see it gettin' closer? Just surrender 'cause you feel the feelin' takin' over 

Which is a pretty good way to explain Silvertongue commands and his general attitude to them, don’t you think? 

I’m done now. I have more songs and entire playlists but I’m done, I’ve rambled enough, this is long. I will tag: @joyful-soul-collector @druidx73 @petrolstationflowers @scmalarky @the-starlight-chills and you sir, over there, please, tell me about songs.

[dream-of-kpop]

Minho × Hyunjin: Reveal

[this is basically funny "smut" idk man, i hope you enjoy tho :>]

.

[Some time at night]

*Hyunjin lies on his back, in bed, staring at his phone as he scrolls on Instagram*

Hyunjin: "I wish i had a girlfriend to send nudes to at night..."

Minho: *mumbles* "I mean *plays with hands*...you can send me nudes at night..."

Hyunjin: *sits up* "Nah...it wouldn't be the same..."

Minho: 😔

Hyunjin: "What's wrong?"

Minho: "Ohhh it's nothing"

Hyunjin: "Come on, tell me, we're homies, you can tell me anything"

Minho: "Can you not call me homie? It's very cringey"

Hyunjin: *clearly annoyed* "...Fine then"

Minho: "Ok but like...i mean why wouldn't you want me to see your nudes?"

Hyunjin: "What?"

Minho: "Forget i said anything"

Hyunjin: "What.....you wanna see my dick?"

Minho: *sweats* "...Um"

Hyunjin: "Hold up, I'm going to the bathroom, keep an eye on your messages"

Minho: *frozen smile on his face* "Ok"

*Hyunjin leaves*

Minho: "Holy fuck it's happening...YES-"

*Minutes later Jisung knocks on the door*

Jisung: "Hey Hyunjin did you h-"

Minho: "HYUNJIN ISN'T IN HERE, GO THE FUCK AWAY"

Jisung: *upset* "WHY ARE YOU BEING SO RUDE WHOEVER YOU ARE??"

*Minho replies in a high pitched tone but lowkey sounds like Mickey Mouse*

Minho: "GO AWAY JISUNG, NOW IS NOT THE TIME"

Jisung: "JEONGIN???"

Minho: "gO aWaY hAN"

*Jisung stomps away*

[Meanwhile, Minho keeps checking his messages]

Minho: "Damn hurry up already..."

[6 minutes pass]

*Hyunjin yells from the bathroom after taking his pictures*

Hyunjin: "DID YOU SEE THEM?"

Minho: "NO I HAVEN'T GOTTEN THEM YET"

*Hyunjin walks in his room confused*

Hyunjin: "Did you pay your bill? I sent them like 5 minutes ago"

Minho: "What do you mean 'Did i pay my bill?' of course i did, i still don't see the pictures tho"

*They both stare at eachother in silence*

Minho: "..."

Hyunjin: "..."

*Hyunjin checks all his chats*

Hyunjin: "Omg i haven't sent them yet...we're good"

Minho: "Whew...ok, send them now"

Hyunjin: "You might wanna sit down for these"

*Minho breathes in and out, sits down on the bed*

Minho: "Ok, I'm ready"

*Hyunjin presses send*

*They both wait patiently in silence*

Minho: "I haven't gotten anything yet"

Hyunjin: "I just sent them tho"

Minho: "Bruh if you sent them to the wrong person..."

Hyunjin: "Nah, I sent them to our Kakao chat"

Minho: "Lemme see"

*Hyunjin scrolls pass the random sasaeng accounts*

Hyunjin: "That's your profile picture right?"

Minho: "Nah...that's Jisung's...you can see his big ass head from here..."

Hyunjin: "Where?"

*Minho points to the screen*

Hyunjin: "Ohhhh..."

*Minho looks at Hyunjin's messages*

Minho: "WAIT, YOU SENT THEM TO JISUNG BRUH"

*Hyunjin quickly deletes it*

Hyunjin: "Fuck what if-"

Minho: "No one saw it, i didn't see it, this never happened"

*As Minho opens the door to leave, he sees Jisung standing in the hall*

Jisung: "Um Hyunjin, remember that blanket I gave you? Nevermind...just keep it" *speed walks away*

Hyunjin: "...Minho"

Minho: "THIS NEVER HAPPENED, WE NEVER TALK ABOUT THIS AGAIN"

*Minho leaves Hyunjin standing in his room confused*

[The next morning, during breakfast]

*Everyone eats & talks but they notice Hyunjin, Jisung & Minho are oddly quiet*

Seungmin: "Why are ya'll so quiet?"

Hyunjin: "Nothing, just, tired..."

Jisung: *shakes head* "Nah...I saw some shit...some shit no one should ever see...I'm scared..."

Seungmin: ?

Seungmin: "You stayed up watching Family Guy again?"

.

hyungwonthefraud

*screen cuts to black* *classy family guy music starts playing*

[zanybohbot]

The Outsiders: A Stupid Night Out In London

A STUPID NIGHT OUT IN LONDON - The Outsiders (1st Episode)

Published: 10-10-19 - Updated: 10-15-19

Warning: Rated R for Strong Language/Sexual References

Enjoy!

Part 1: The Plan

(Squit N/R: In case you're interested, at the walking with da bros' day in L.A. began 'with prayers, followed by hymns and then an inspirational reading. Here it began with Pinky and Pesto showing us a pornographic video.)

Pinky: Watch this.

Wakko: This is tame.

Brain: What the hell? Pinky, they're not even naked. Oh, wait a minute, is she gonna?

(they all gag at the video)

Brain: Oh, my God, that can't be real!

Squit: That's got to be chocolate.

Pinky: They should've got a bigger cup.

Pesto: Yeah.

Squit: REALLY! How tame is that, dafuq?! (gasp) Oh, Christ, I'm gonna heave.

Wakko: Jesus wept! Don't lick it! She's gonna vomit.

Squit: I'm gonna vomit.

Pesto: This is the best scene, look.

(they gag again, loudly)

Wakko: Ohhh! Oh Is it possible to un-see things? I don't like girls anymore.

Squit: So you get a new laptop and the first thing you did was find that?

Pinky: No, it wasn't the first thing.

Squit: This was the first thing.

(WOMAN MOANS) Oh, y'all such saddos.

Wakko: I AM NOT A SADDO...I'm a man!

Squit: That's it, we can't carry on like this!

Pesto: Carry on like what?

Squit: We can't spend another day treading water, being the same old sad cases.

Pesto: (confused) Whaddaya mean by dat?

Squit: Nothing, we can't be the same old sad cases.

Pesto: (furiously) Are you calling me crackers? Are you saying that I am a large sodium covered square here to amuse you? IS THAT WHAT YA SAYIN'?!

Squit: NO! You idiot, you not a sad case!

Pesto: HA! That's what I thought. I'm not a sad case.

Pinky: Yo dad's gay.

Pesto: Fuck off.

Squit: Look, the point we've got to do something else.

Pesto: What do you mean?

Pinky: Carpe diem that puh?

Wakko: Piss off my siblings?

Brain: Seize the world, do something unexpected?

Squit: No. Reinvent ourselves, show the girls and everyone else who we really are. Like clubbing in London.

Brain: No, thanks. I'm not taking my car 'coz the insurance company will kill me.

Squit: Awww, what?

Wakko: Well, I could drive us. I got a car last weekend.

Squit: You've got a car?! Have you passed your test already?

Wakko: Yeah, I have.

Pesto: Now we don't have to drive around to the airport in Brain's ol' bitch mobile.

Brain: Good 'coz I'm not going.

Squit: Look, you don't have to drive, will you come, please?

Brain: It's not the driving. It's more that we won't get in anywhere, won't get served and might get robbed, stabbed or killed.

Pinky: Bullshit! I go up to London all the time.

Brain: When do you ever go to London?

Pinky: I went 5 times, I fucked some girl up there.

Squit: Did you? Where was that?

Pinky: It was in the Tower of London.

Squit: (sarcastically) The Tower of London? What did you do after you'd fucked her, cut her head off? Showed her the crown jewels?

Pinky: Maybe because she'd already seen the crown jewels, smartass!

Squit: Whatever. (looks at Brain) Brain, please come along.

Brain: But it'll be expensive.

Squit: C'mon, now you're just making excuses.

Pinky: Plus, don't some of those clubs charge? I've already told you, I know the homie who runs all the doors. He'll slip us in.

Brain: And when that turns out to be bullshit, then what?

(Billie walks to Brain.)

Billie: Hi, B!

Brain: Bills!

Billie: How's your stomach?

Brain: Oh good.

Billie: I have some great news to tell you. We're going to London on Saturday, clubbing. Do you want to come?

Brain: Sounds fun, we'd love to go. Which club are you going to?

Billie: Erm Spearmint Rhino.

Brain: Wait, Isn't that a strip club?

Billie: Yeah, sorry, Buster Bunny made a mistake. We're going to one of the big ones, one of the big cool ones right in the middle of London.

Brain: Cool which one?

Billie: Erm the Land of The Sound. And that's exactly where we're going.

Brain, Pinky, Pesto, Squit and Wakko: NICE!

Wakko: I'm driving if you want a lift.

Billie: Nah, we'll probably head up early. A lift back would be great, though.

Wakko: No problemo.

Pinky: So do you go clubbing a lot?

Billie: Me?

Pinky: Uhhh...yeah, you.

Billie: Erm Yeah, yeah, course. Anyways, dancing on the podium probably or up by the speakers, where it's, if anything, too loud!

Brain, Pinky, Pesto, Squit and Wakko: NICE! OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHH!

Brain: See you there.

Billie: See ya.

Brain: Great.

Billie: See you later, then.

(she leaves)

Pinky: What did I tell you? London and pussy go hand in hand.

Brain: Fuck yeah, I'm going on a date with Billie!

Squit: It's not really a date ya know.

Brain: I think it is.

Pinky: Shall we go and get ready for tomorrow night?

Brain: Yep, good idea.

Part 2: Trip Gone Wrong

(All 4 were walking to the Warner's siblings' house to pick up Wakko.)

(Squit N/R: I had no idea how we'd actually get into a club, 'but I wasn't taking any chances and wore my smartest shoes, 'something Brain didn't do.)

Squit: Uhhh. Why are you wearing sneakers, B?

Brain: Because they look good. Everyone wears sneakers you know.

Squit: I specifically said no sneakers, not if we want to get into clubs. Pinky hasn't got sneakers on, Pesto hasn't got sneakers on, I haven't got sneakers on.

Pinky: Yeah. Ewww...you've got fucking flippers on! What size are they anyway?

Brain: Well duh, Pinky. I am size 8, my size.

Pinky: Yeah, Ronald McDonald called - he wants his shoes back. (Laughs)

Brain: Just shut up, Pinky.

Squit: Well there's nothing wrong with these, they're 1970s French. (looks at his own 1979 Dior's he's wearing)

Pesto: Hey! Where are my-a flippers? At least you'll be all dank if yo stupid-ass fall in the mafia.

Squit: Yeah, very funny. Look, all I'm saying is would it have killed you to wear "normal" shoes just to be on the safe side?

(They saw Wakko's 1975 Ferrari)

Pesto: Whoa, check out Wak's car!

Pinky: Yeah! It's shit-hot!

Squit: I'd say half-right. (The car looks half-damaged and brown) Yep, it's shit.

(Pinky knocks their door and Dot opens it as she is smoking weed and wears emo-pink hair.)

Brain: Hi, Dot! I was…

Dot: Don't ask. He's already upstairs getting ready.

Pesto: So how's things with you?

Pinky: Yeah! I feel like I haven't seen you in ages.

Dot: Wak! Those assholes wanna know if you're coming out to play or not.

Wakko: (upstairs) Coming!

Pinky: (carefully stares at Dot's boobs) So D, would ya came to tha club wit us?

Dot: Yeah, will you stop staring at my tits, please?! (leaves)

Pinky: OK, I'm thinking it's a big N.O.

Pesto: She must be on the blob.

Wakko: (comes downstairs to go outside) All right? What do you think of the car, then? It's like a tractor beam for fanny.

Brain: (nervous) I love it! Good job, buddy!

Wakko: It's got a Piper exhaust and a well smart body-kit. My sister's boyfriend is helping me do it up, he's a mechanic.

Pinky: Well it will be nice for Pesto's dad to have a man about the house, Wak.

Pesto & Wakko: What does that mean?

Pinky: It means, "Does Pesto's dad suck dick?"

Pesto: No! But your sister does.

Wakko: No! Well, I mean, she might do. Oh who am I kidding anymore, she definitely does.

Brain: Oh nice Porsche Engineering sticker by the way. (looks at Wakko's Porsche sticker on his car)

Wakko: I know. I put that on myself, it's gotta be worth at least a hand-job.

Squit: How fast does it go?

Wakko: Who knows? I ain't got it going yet.

Squit: This'll be the first time you've driven it?

Wakko: Nah, it don't work, it ain't got an engine in it yet. Dave's still trying to find me one.

Pinky: But, motherfucka, I thought you were driving us up to the airport.

Wakko: Yeah, so did I.

Brain: (getting angry) Oh, god. Why...why did you...why haven't you told us that before.

Wakko: Well, I'm sorry. I thought you knew.

Brain: So how do you plan to drive us up there without a car?!

Wakko: I thought I was going to drive your car.

Brain: But you're not insured to drive my car, Wakko!

Wakko: (pondered) Ohhh. Whoops.

Brain: (sarcastically) WHOOPS! That's it, a fucking "whoops"?! Hey, Larry. Did you hear that guy without an engine saying "WHOOPS"!?

Wakko: God, I said I was sorry.

Squit: Oh, well, since Wakko had one job but clearly FAILED, I guess there's only one last solution. (They look at Brain about his car)

Brain: What? (They still look at Brain until Brain gasps realising what's gonna happen next) Oh no! Nope! Sorry, not gonna happen.

Squit: But, you have to.

Brain: No! I already said no, and the insurance company will get pissed if they find out I've driven that car to London.

Pesto: Oh, don't beat yourself up. They won't find out.

Pinky: And even if they do, you'll have far too many fingers up Billie to care.

Squit: Please, Brain?

(Brain finally realized he knew what he had to do.)

Brain: Oh, Christ, thanks a lot, Wakko!

Wakko: You need to be clearer about things, I reckon.

Brain: (furious) OK, is this clear enough? (Brain hits Wakko with a pencil) You're a fucking idiot!

(They walk to Brain's car)

Pinky: Calm down! I'll get some beers for the trip.

Brain: I can't drink and drive!

Pinky: Course you can, it's just a saying!

(Squit N/R: So Pinky, Wakko and Pesto already brought lagers from the gas station and we were gone. But I feel like the episode is gonna take to long while we're in the plane sooo...let's just cut to the chase in England, shall we? The plan was simple - get to London, get into a club and pull Billie and Amber. I said it was simple, not realistic. Meanwhile, we can enjoy the enlightening conversation in the car.)

Pinky: OK, newsflash, who would you rather fuck, Squit's mom…?

Squit: (facepalms) Great.

Pinky: ...Wakko's sister…?

Wakko: ASS!

Pinky: ...or Pesto's homo dad?

Pesto: FUCK OFF! (silence) Maybe...Squit's ma.

Squit: Don't join in, Pesto!

Pinky: Well, I dunno about dat. Wakko's sister would have the tighter snatch, I guess.

Wakko: Leave her out of this!

Brain: But Squit's mom has got huge tits.

Wakko: They are amazing.

Squit: (sarcastically) Thanks, Wak.

Brain: Although Wakko's sister looks like she'd be better at sucking dick with Pesto's dad.

Pinky: Like father like daughter. I could see her going at it like a dog eating hot fries.

Wakko & Pesto: Shut up, Pinky!

Pinky: I'd like to put my cock in them both.

Squit: That's a touching sentiment.

Pinky: I'd touch yo mama's sentiment.

Squit: That doesn't mean anything.

Pinky: It means I'd touch her puh - with my diugh.

Squit: (sarcastically) Nice one!

Wakko: I've thought about it, and I'd definitely rather fuck Squit's mom.

Brain: Are you sure, Wak? What about your sister's tight snatch?

Wakko: No, totally sure.

Pinky: Nice, slow down a minute, B! (Pinky opens the window to shout "Bus Wankers!" to all the British people waiting for a bus.)

Brain: (laughing hysterically) Bus wankers! Where did that come from? Bus wankers!

Pinky: I dunno, it just felt right! Remember, this is England. You could see their little faces drop as they thought, "We must be the bus wankers."

Pesto: Pull over, B. I need a piss.

Brain: I can't pull over, there's a bus lane.

Pesto: Please, I'm desperate, c'mon.

Brain: You'll just have to hold it, Pesto, we're late enough.

(Pesto found an empty can so he can pee in here as he was laughing like a villain.)

Squit: What are you doing?

Pesto: Ayy, coo off.

Brain: Are you pissing in my car?

Pesto: Nah.

Brain: Then, what's that noise?

Pesto: I'm pissing in a can.

Brain: What the fuck?! You'll get piss on the floor!

Pesto: Ayy, coo off. It won't overflow. I've got mah chap's-eye right in there, so I can't miss. No problemo.

Pinky: It stinks, Pesto!

Pesto: (gasp) Uh-oh, it don't wanna stop.

Pinky: WHAT?!

Brain: What do you mean, "it"?!

Squit: Just stop pissing yourself, P!

Pesto: Quick, pass me another can!

Wakko: That's not happening.

Pesto: It's filled up to the top, I've got to get it out and...OH SHIT! (gasp) Oh, my helmet! (gasp) I've cut it on the can! (gasp) Oh, I think it's bleeding!

Brain: Fuck bleeding! Is it still pissing?

Pesto: Oh, it stings!

Squit: Does anybody wanna swap seats with me?

Pesto: I will!

Squit: Not you, Pesto!

Brain: Get rid of it, Pesto!

(Pesto threw it out the window but somehow got 25% piss on Pinky.)

Pinky: Ah, Pesto!

(Squit N/R: So high on the smell of Pesto's urine, 'we headed for the bright lights of London.)

Part 3: Bus Wankers Gone Wrong

(Squit N/R: Look out, ladies, phase one was complete. We had finally made it to London. And we even managed to see all the sights 'Because Brain got us totally fucking lost.)

Brain: It must be somewhere round here.

Pinky: Well, duh. How should we know? I knew we'd get lost.

Brain: Thanks a lot, you idiots!

Wakko: What did I do?

Squit: Lemme see. Wakko has a car without an engine and Pesto pissing IN THE CAR!

Pesto: Ayy, coo off! Is it our fault you're a shit driver?

Brain: Look, I don't want Billie to be pissed off if I'm late, OK.

Wakko: Ha. You need to grow some balls, I reckon.

Pinky: Why not pull over and ask someone where the club full of clunge is?

Pesto: Wait. (Gets out his laptop from his suitcase) I've got Google Maps on my laptop. Should be able to find it no problemo!

Brain: Pesto, will you just shut...

Pinky: Aye aye!

Brain: No, Pinky! DON'T!

Pinky: (Looking at the people waiting for a bus) Bus wankers! (HE LAUGHS)

(Brain pulled over because of the traffic.)

Pinky: Why are we stopping?

Brain: I tried to say! Oh, Christ, Pinky!

Pinky: Well it's not my fault if I...oh shit! (He saw an angry person from the bus coming.) Oh, shit! Oh fuck, they're coming! Shit! Drive!

Brain: Where?! Where am I actually gonna drive to?!

Squit: Anywhere!

Wakko: Oh, shit!

(Brain drives to the pavement.)

Squit: No, Brain, anywhere but the pavement! ANYWHERE BUT THE PAVE…!

(The car is on the pavement)

Squit: ...ment. I specifically said anywhere BUT the pavement.

(A black man comes to Brain)

Brain: Greetings, British people, I… (Brain is getting choked by a man) Sorry, I'm sorry. I'm really sorry, I...

Man: Who's a wanker? I'm a wanker, am I? Yeah?

Brain: I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

Man: Yeah? Yeah?

Squit: He said he was sorry.

Brain: I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm really sorry

Man: I'm a wanker, yeah?

Squit: He's sorry. He's really sorry.

Brain: I'm sorry. (The man let's go of Brain's neck.) Sorry.

Man: (HE LAUGHS AND LEAVES) I'd rather be a bus wanker than drive that piece of yellow shit with those fucking Americans!

(silence)

Pinky: Holy fuck, words cannot describe how you two pussied out.

Brain: (angrily) Oh, what now?!

Pinky: Don't "what now" me! (mimics Brain) Ooh, sorry, sorry! Ooh, I'm sorry, don't hurt me, sorry.

Brain: 'Coz you got me fucking throttled!

Pinky: Ooh, sorry!

Brain: Oh, fuck off!

Wakko: (mimics Brain) Sorry I'm on the pavement.

Pesto: (mimics Brain) Sorry, sorry, sorry for my little shit-ass car.

Pinky: I'm sorry I'm alive and a bender!

Brain: JUST FUCK OFF!

(Brain rotates his car back to the road continued driving)

Wakko: Sorry, B!

(They all laugh, except for Brain and Squit)

Wakko: Sorry I'm such a tool!

Pesto: Oh, sorry, I pissed in the car!

Pinky: Ooh, sorry I pissed British people off!

(Squit N/R: Don't get me wrong, Brain's a good friend, but it's fair to say he drives like a retard. But eventually, in Chinatown, just a few hundred yards from the club, we found the perfect parking space. Well, almost perfect.)

Brain: Guy, I don't think I can park here.

Squit: We've been driving round for an hour looking for a space. This one's perfect, let's just get going!

Brain: But it says we'll get clamped.

Pinky: Nah, it's a weekend, bruh? Different rules.

Squit: I'm sure he's right, B, and no-one clamps any more.

Pesto: Please can we get going? I really need to check my D. I think I've got a big problemo.

Brain: (annoyed) Can you stop saying "problemo"? It's not cool or funny, it's just embarrassing.

Pinky: Don't worry, P, he'll say sorry in a minute.

Wakko: Ha.

Brain: Maybe I should move it?

Squit: Brain, listen to me. Billie has agreed to go clubbing with you, that's a big step forward, but in the hour it'll take to find another parking space she could have gone off the idea.

Pinky: She could be jerking off the DJ by now.

Squit: I doubt that's happening, but the point is valid. This is a great parking spot, let's just get a move on.

Wakko: We are wasting valuable boning time.

Brain: Fine. Fine, c'mon. (He was about to lock the car.)

Pesto: Don't bother locking it, B.

Brain: (sarcastically) Yeah, thanks, Pesto.

Pinky: If you're lucky, someone might steal it!

Brain: Yeah, good one.

(Squit N/R: So despite the odd throttling and cut penis, we made it to the club - the girls even seemed pleased to see us!)

Brain: Hey, Bills!

Billie: Oh, hi Brain. I wondered where you were.

Brain: Did you?

Billie: You're actually here.

Brain: Yes. You weren't lying about coming, huh?

Billie: No. Why would I be lying?

Brain: Don't know. Don't know why I said that. Great, well we'll see you in there?

Pinky: Don't be a pussy, just slip in!

(All 5 slips through the line.)

Billie: Oh, are you joining us?

Brain: Yeah. Yeah, I think so.

Plucky: (at the back) Are you fucking pushing in?

Max: (at the back) Excuse me, those assholes pushed in!

Buster: So, great you're near the front.

Squit: Yeah, well, been here long enough.

Babs: Suppose you have.

Squit: I just really wanna get inside and dance now.

Buster: Us too.

Babs: There's something very animalistic about our need to dance.

(Plucky and Max are throwing cans at them and laughing.)

Babs: Dude, their throwing stuff at you.

Squit: Don't think so. They're frustrated 'coz they want to get inside too. They're saying, "Let us in, we've got great dancing ants in our pants!"

Plucky: (at the back) Get to the back of the line, you fuckboi!

Amber (behind Squit): Do you mind if we stand with our back to you? I don't want them to think you're with us.

Squit: No probs.

(Squit N/R: Amber had the most beautiful back of a head I'd ever seen. Now all we had to do was get into the club. Until…)

Security Guard: No trainers.

Brain: What?!

Security Guard: No trainers.

Brain: But they're new.

Security Guard: No trainers.

Billie: I'll see you in there in a minute.

Brain: Yep, good idea.

(Billie goes into the club while the other are still outside.)

Wakko: Yep, well, we're fucked.

Brain: I take it you don't know that bouncer, then, Pinky?

Pinky: What's this gotta do with me? I'm not tha one wearing sneakers!

Squit: (angrily) You fuckin' idiot! I am totally in there, like...totally. Would it have killed ya to wear shoes?

Wakko: We could probably make another pair out of yours and have enough leather left to cover a sofa.

Brain: (looks at the homeless guy wearing black shoes) Doesn't matter anyway, I've got a better idea. I'm gonna borrow some shoes.

Squit: What?

(they all look at the homeless guy)

Pinky: Ewww...Hammerhead shark!

Pesto: Oh, no!

Squit: Look, I'm gonna level with you - I am scared. London scares me. The bouncer scares me and that man REALLY scares me. Let's just put this one down as another character forming experience and go back home.

Brain: Come on, Squit! It's for Billie! She'll love it, it's romantic.

Squit: Well, It's not Romeo and Juliet. These are gross shoes we're talking about! (Brain runs to the homeless guy.) NO! DON'T!

Brain: Scuse me, dude? Dude? Scuse me? Can I borrow your shoes?

Homeless Guy: Eh?

Brain: I wanna borrow your shoes, I'm trying to impress a girl.

(Squit facepalms)

Homeless Guy: Giz a blow job.

Brain: What?

Homeless Guy: I'll give you a blow job.

Brain: No. God, no, no blow jobs. I just want your shoes.

Homeless Guy: All right, £200 quid!

Brain: Great.

Homeless Guy: And your shoes.

Brain: Oh, of course.

(Squit N/A: Good old Brain. I can always rely on him to add a touch of class to proceedings. In many ways, though, it proved how much he valued Billie. Certainly more than he valued his dignity.)

Brain: (he puts on the shoes) Uhhh...they're a bit soggy.

Homeless Guy: Aye, that'll be my piss.

Brain: OK. Thanks.

(He walks with Squit and the others to the club.)

Squit: I can't believe you…!

Brain: Don't!

(Squit N/R: I'm not saying it was the most fucked up club in England, but you have to question, a door policy which says no to sneakers, but a big thumbs up to piss-soaked tramp shoes.)

Part 4: In A Party

(Squit N/R: But we were in! We had got in! Yes! In the club! An actual club! Yes! I've died and gone to "clunge" heaven.)

Squit: Oh, nice! Well, this is what we wanted.

Wakko: This is it, the first day of the rest of our lives.

Pesto: It's one small step for a man, one giant leap for ya flippers.

Brain: Really?

Pinky: Fuck yeah, 'coz you won't be laughing when we pull Billie and Amber.

Brain: No I won't, 'coz it ain't gonna happen.

Pinky: You can spend your evening talking to little bitches, me and Wakko and Pesto are gonna find ourselves some proper puh with experienced snatches. (as Pinky, Wakko and Pesto leaves)

Brain & Squit: Good luck with that.

Squit: (shouting) Just so you know, I think the Tower of London is closed now.

Pinky: (from the distance) Whatever.

Brain: (as he saw Billie walking towards him) There she is. How do I look?

Squit: You look good.

Brain: From the ankles up, obviously.

Squit: Obviously.

Brain: Where's Amber?

Squit: Don't worry, she's keen, I'm sure she'll find me. Away you go, dude.

(Squit leaves.)

Brain: Wish me luck.

(Brain saw Billie)

Brain: Billie.

Billie: Brain, you got in! I thought you were turned away.

Brain: Oh, the bouncers were being complete dicks and there was a thing with my shoes. They're out of ice already. Can you believe that?

(Roderick came along.)

Billie: Oh, Brain, this is Roderick. He's a BFF of Amber's.

Brain: Oh.

Roderick: Y'Okay?

Brain: Yeah, you?

Roderick: Course, man. Saw ya playing the character in Animaniacs and Pinky and the Brain. You were sick.

Billie: Not to mention, Brain is an old friend of the family, he first met me since we were 13. Not just that, though.

Roderick: Can you smell piss?

Billie: Um Urgh, yes.

(Brain looked worried because of the shoes.)

Roderick: That's totally rank.

Brain: Must be the toilets.

Billie: We should move.

Brain: Yeah, good idea.

(They all left.)

(Squit N/R: Meanwhile, Pinky, Pesto and Wakko headed downstairs to discuss the nuances of sexual politics.)

Pinky: She'd definitely get it!

Wakko: Most definitely.

Pesto: What about her? I think she looked over.

(Points to a girl in the middle.)

Pinky: What, her? Nice body, frightening face. You'd have to do her from behind.

Wakko: What about her? Still big, but then fat girls are more grateful.

(points to a girl in the right.)

Pinky: Wow, check out the jubblies on that! Oh, she'd get it.

Wakko: Until it fell off.

Pesto: Oh, please don't.

Pinky: Please do.

Pesto: (gasp) Oh, no - she's given me a boner, my cut's worse than ever. I've gotta go and fix it. (runs to the bathroom.)

Pinky: Suit yourself, but we might not be here when ya get back. That one's giving us tha old, "I'm gonna milk yo ballsack dry" look.

(Squit N/R: And in the bathroom, Pesto had a very big "problemo" with his dick.)

Pesto: (still rubbing his penis with water as he groans) Please, make it stop.

(Squit N/R: I had my own difficulties in the cock department. Amber was sitting next to one.)

(Squit saw Amber with Max.)

Squit: Amber! There you are, found ya! Ready to put on your dancing shoes?

Amber: I know I am!

Squit: That's good!

(Squit meets Max.)

Squit: Hi, I'm Squit.

Max: Max.

Squit: So, do you come here often, Max?

Max: I bet you say that to all the girls!

Squit: Ya got some chutzpah, I'll give ya that. Anyway, nice to meet ya, Max, but we're going.

Max: What?! I'm good here, thanks.

Squit: Come on. It's getting a bit crowded round here, eh, Max?

Max: Sorry, dude. No chance.

Squit: Look, come on, dude. You've had a good run. Believe me, if I was in ya shoes and I saw a gorgeous girl sitting on her own, I'd have made the move by now, but I'm here now, so...

Max: So what?

Squit: So do the honorable thing and step aside, because I was in with her first.

Amber: No, you weren't.

Max: Jesus, is he for real? He talks like he's from a black and white film.

Squit: Yes, I was. I stood with you in the line.

Amber: Yeah, behind me.

Squit: (getting angry) Well, more beside you. And you specifically asked me if I was coming along tonight. I have got witnesses ya know.

Amber: (annoyed) Squit, I think you've got the wrong end of the stick.

Squit: Evidently! So is that it?! So shall I just go away and leave you to it?!

Amber: Yes.

Max: Go away!

Squit: Fine! Fine! That's the last you see of me anyway. (he leaves) Thanks, Max. Thanks a lot, dude.

Max: No probs.

(Squit N/R: I was starting to go off Amber. She wasn't really my type anymore. Elsewhere, my friends were faring no better.)

Roderick: I can still smell it. It's following us.

Billie: Brain, I'm not being rude, but I think that smell might be you.

Brain; Okay, fine. You caught me. These shoes do kick up a bit.

Roderick: Jesus, dafuq is on your feet?

Brain: These aren't my shoes. I had to borrow them to get in.

Billie: I'm sorry but who brings spare shoes to a nightclub?

Brain: No-one. I swapped them with a homeless guy outside the club.

Roderick: What was he, a tramp?

Brain: (confused) I think you're supposed to say homeless now.

Billie: Sorry, you're wearing a tramp's shoes?

Roderick: Bro, that's fuckin' disgusting.

Brain: (looking awkward) Yeah. Maybe.

(Meanwhile in the bathroom, Pesto is still fixing his cut penis as Pinky and Wakko enters the bathroom.)

Pinky: Dafuq's taking ya so long?

Pesto: Oh, bro, it's not good. Get me a band-aid, it's bleeding, look.

Pinky: Motherfucka, put ya dick away! That's disgusting.

Pesto: But that's da problem tho, I can't. It stings when it rubs on my underwear.

Wakko: Well, take your underwear off.

Pesto: Then it'll rub on my jeans.

Pinky: Pesto, no matter what ya old man says, ya can't walk around London with yo dick hanging out.

(3 security guards went into the bathroom to kick Pinky, Wakko and Pesto out for "wanking".)

Pinky: What?!

Pesto: I wasn't doing anything!

Wakko: HELP!

(Meanwhile, Brain and Squit are talking in the club.)

Brain: So she didn't see the romantic intention behind the tramp shoes? Not immediately, but if that prick, Roderick, hadn't been there it would've been different. To be fair, the smell is appalling. What happened with Amber anyways?

Squit: Oh, the usual. It was going quite well, then she realised I'm a massive dickhead and she pulled some other asshole.

Brain: So, we didn't…?

Squit: Nope.

(silence)

Brain: This place is trash.

Squit: Ya right, let's go.

(Brain and Squit were about to leave when they saw Pinky, Wakko and Pesto getting kicked out.)

Pesto: No, wait! I wasn't jerking off.

Squit: (sarcastically) Wow, just my luck.

Pesto: My D's cut. My D is cut!

(Squit N/R: So we were kicked out, out the club. The actual club kicked us out. Exactly 25 minutes after it started, our life as cool London clubbers was over.)

Final Part: YOU OWE ME £200!

(All 5 are walking down the alleyway to Brain's car.)

Squit: So, tell me what happened again?

Pesto: I was looking at the cut on my dick. Pinky and Wakko were helping me out.

Brain: (confused) Sorry, they were helping you out?

Wakko: (embarrassed) Oh boy, here we go.

Pinky: (annoyed) Look, it's not what it sounds. Okay.

Squit: (teasing) 'Coz it sounds like you two were watching Pesto jerking himself off in the bathroom.

Pesto: Ayy, coo off! I wasn't jerking off, I was just rolling it around in my hands.

Squit: Okay, spare us the details.

Brain: Oh, fuck. What if Billie's getting off with that asshole?

Pinky: Don't cry, B. At least you can get your sneakers back.

Brain: What? (He looks back at the homeless guy he met before, as the homeless guy got Brain's sneakers covered in shit.)

Homeless Guy: Fucking beauty. I'll have that, you bastard.

Brain: (annoyed) Oh, wow. How the FUCK did this happen?!

Homeless Guy: What?

Brain: Oh, c'mon, man! You've only had them an hour!

Wakko: Maybe he's been out?

Squit: Technically, he's always out.

Brain: (furious) That's it, I'm done! Let's go! I've had enough! Standing sober in an alleyway stinking of piss and wearing a tramp's shoes was not what I had planned for this evening!

(They leave the alleyway where the club is.)

Squit: Out of interest, did you think it would go better or worse than this?

(Squit N/R: So the night was over and all we wanted to do now was get back in Brain's shitty car and go home, but until...)

Brain: Oh no.

(Brain and the others saw his car got clamped.)

Brain: Oh, fuck. Oh, fuckety fuck fucko! Ooh, shit. Fuck, how much money in British pounds have we got between us?!

Pinky: No, yo stupid-ass chose to park here. (laughs)

Brain: Goddamnit, Pinky! (looks at Squit) Squit?

Squit: Sorry, man. I don't have any pounds left. Getting in cleaned me out. The only thing is to have a Visa to exchange money, but I left mine at home.

Brain: So nobody has a Visa?

Pinky, Wakko and Pesto: Nope.

Brain: (angrily) Great, well we're fucked. We've got no Visas.

Squit: Dude, I really hate saying this but...I think you'll have to call your dad.

Brain: Are you fuckin' insane?! It's one in the morning. He's gonna go fucking ballistic.

Pesto: Unlock it, B. I'm freezing.

Squit: He loves you. Plus, you dad is the only one to have a Visa. I'm sure he'd rather come and get you than see you suffer.

(Brain sighed and went to call his dad from his phone.)

Brain: Dad, it's Brain. Brain! Don't panic, nothing's wrong. Just calm down. No, I'm not dead. Well, if I'm dead, how could I be talking to you?

(The delivery guy comes out of nowhere.)

Delivery Guy: Oi!

Squit: Fuck.

Delivery Guy: You owe me £200.

Brain: I'll call you back. (hangs up)

Squit: Sir, as I am sure you're aware, private clamping is illegal. In addition to that, it is a weekend...

Delivery Guy: I couldn't get my fucking van out.

Brain: Look, I've just called my dad and he'll...

Delivery Guy: I couldn't give a fuck. £200 NOW!

(They all screamed as they get in the car quickly.)

Brain: I don't have it!

Squit: We don't have it!

(The delivery guy shakes and bashes Brain's car)

Delivery Guy: I want £200! Can't you fucking read? No fucking parking! I missed all my fucking deliveries.

(Brain saw Billie walking.)

Brain: Billie! Billie!

Delivery Guy: Give me my fucking money now. I'm gonna fucking kill you unless you give me my fucking money?

Brain: Do you still want that lift?

Billie: Erm, no. I'm fine, thanks.

Brain: Okay, see ya in…2 days.

(Billie leaves.)

Squit: Dude, just call your dad.

Brain: (sighed) Fine.

Delivery Guy: £200 £200! GAHHH! I'm gonna fucking kill you unless you give me my fucking money!

(Squit N/R: So we had successfully reinvented ourselves, but not as the boys who go clubbing. We were now the boys who freaked out girls,... (Dot: Yeah, would you stop staring at my tits, please?!) ...apologised a lot,... (Brain: Sorry, I'm really sorry.) ...wore tramp's shoes,... (Brain: Uhhh...they're a bit soggy. Homeless Guy: Aye, that'll be my piss.) ...and jerked off in public bathrooms. (Pesto: My D is cut!) And we agreed to never go clubbing in London ever again.)

Pesto: I think you've got a big problemo.

Brain: Oh, just shut up, Pesto!

Squit: Wow, you're really obsessed with that word.

Pesto: (confused) Whaddya mean by that?

Squit: What? Nothing, I just said you're really obsessed.

Pesto: (angrily) Oh, so what your sayin' that I'm an egotistical maniac who takes things too seriously to be annoying? That my range amuses you? Is that what your sayin'?!

Squit: No. I just said you're obsessed.

Pesto: I'm obsessed.

Squit: Yeah. That's what I'm saying.

(Then Pesto gets furious.)

Squit: (scared) Oh, for christ's sake.

Pesto: DAT'S IT! (then attacks Squit.) THIS IS ALL YA FAULT, YOU GOT US INTO DIS MESS!

Pinky: Ha, ha. Don't worry, Brain. Maybe y'all should try saying sorry over and over.

Wakko: Oh, sorry for parking like a retard.

(Pinky and Wakko laugh while Brain gets furious.)

Brain: Oh, just FUCK OFF!

THE END!

Hope you guys enjoyed this fan episode, I have been wanting to do this for a long time. If some makes an animation of this, it will be zany as FUCK! Thank ya, see yo lata! Peace.

[thatdarnblogagain]

5 video gaming maneuvers that leave me triggered

WARNING - This is the list of a severely triggered individual, filled with salt, hate and possibly a nervous breakdown from the sheer stupidity of encountering some of this s*** online. Doctors warn that this may lead you to also hate these maneuvers as well with the passion of a burning sun and if you do not then...you are part of the problem and the writer just got triggered a little bit more! 

1. Bunny Hopping - I think of myself as a pretty good FPS player, well at least compared to my teenage self who could not get a kill in Halo 2 to save his life. My tastes in shooters has evolved quite a bit and now I play such games as Battlefield (since Bad Company 2 HOORAH!) and TitanFall 2 for that FPS fix. 

I really do enjoy those two games but if there is one thing that draws me from the FPS experience of simulated war it is a fool jumping his or her pixelated ass off to avoid my gun fire! Now I know this maybe a valid tactic but the sheer stupidity of seeing it in action pisses me off! This is not backflipping or intricately weaving your way through bullets like an anime ninja, no, this is you trying to get your bunny fetish fix by pretending you have spring coils on your feet!!! Like what the actual f***!!! Then you say it is ski...oh man just threw up a little from how badly that bulls*** smelt. Pressing X or whatever you use to jump randomly takes no skill, get the fu** outta here!

2. Teabagging - You know how you can get me to personally hunt you down in a video game or make me want to beat you senseless in real life rather than your in game avatar? Teabagging! Never has simply hitting down on anything repeatedly caused so much hatred in an activity. You look at the Killcam and see someone crouched over your dead character and going to town or just got stunned in a fighting game and oh look...they are pressing down a lot! 

You may think it is the act itself that angers me. No. It is the realization that someone would waste their time doing this rather than I dunno, winning the fight or going off to find someone else to kill. Though I admit I get a mild...no enormous sense of pleasure when in that same kill cam, that player meets their end at my teammates hand! Lovely!

3. Mashing all of da buttons - Holy f****** s***!!! When you play a fighting game and see a player literally hitting three buttons a second, even when you are not near them so it looks like bad interpretive dance is almost enough to make you toss a controller, that is trigger territory! 

This is made only worse when you somehow manage to lose to this garbage and start to question if you should even be considered a good player after having lost to that dance recital for the talentless dance troupe leader who you were playing.You worked your butt off at a character but OOOOOHHHHH NOOOOOO, your skill will not work against “Press a button and I will do 10 push ups for charity” guy /girl/dog/alien/potato.

4. Picking a top tier - Hold on! Now understand, there is no governing body in a game that tells you who or how to play! You paid your money, for all I care you can play the most OP character or item in there, you have that right! But that will not lessen the trigger, when I pick my balanced weapon or character against you and have to fight up a figurative steep incline that is based in oil, with nothing but my finger nails and pleas for equality! 

Yes I made the choice to play Juri , and you picked any one else but F.A.N.G (because f*** F.A.N.G) and boom, it is already a lost cause unless I play perfectly and you forget number three on this list. No seriously go pick up Urien in Street Fighter 5 and mash all the buttons, if you do not win a round, it is you not him and you need some time a part.

5. Playing Lame - You m***********!!!! Oh what is that you are on a kill streak? Would be a shame if someone were to...end that from a camping position? Ohhh?!?!? I am playing Juri in SFV and you are playing Zangief?!?!? Why don’t you go in this corner over here and wait for me to attack you! And yeah he/she did just that! LMAO!

Ok, it is not so much the act of you playing lame that ticks me off, because I know you like me paid to play the game unless you are playing for free at a friends house, in which case, f*** you! But if you have a character or the skill to simply run up to me and wreck my ish...DO IT! JUST DO IT! Do not waste my time standing in a corner doing nothing and saying that is skill. My younger niece can press back and down on a controller and she is nine. 

This is not zoning, this is you knowing damn well, that this will tick off the other player and you not having the common courtesy to grow some balls (ladies this is for you too... figuratively, not literally) and just attack! But Random, this just increases their chances of winning! No it does not because 4 out of 5 times, I wreck their s*** from being triggered by the pure stupidity of seeing a person get cozy in a corner and call that fun in a game! Fool this ain’t a camping trip or a romantic night! Come catch these hands homie!

Like, subscribe, reblog or all three! ;)

[pinksweatergettingbetter]

//siblings bein’ siblings :’)

-

boy theyre really piling on the dick with roger. and yet, it somehow feels kinda forced. not quite as goofy-forced as ‘matt swirl my brandy and show off my scratched eye engarde’ but still... 

he’s so obnoxious that i wanna hold up a hand like “chill, chill, youre the villain, you dont have to try so hard. yeesh.”

-

In spite of everything, it's still (Tr)u(cy)

-

Did Godot also ghost write the gramarye creed?? We didn't need this man 

-

I love that she's "magical girl Trucy"

-

That is a HUGE ASS SWORD. Trucy must be ripped to balance that shit with one hand 

-

(Cries) the judge bravo’d her my heart

And Apollo asks her to be careful I fhfhfhggg 

-

JUDGE! Don't call her a butt!! - Bonny: a fan of mine took some footage of the me in the show. It's kind of creepy but it might help.

Me: ok well it can't be any creepier than the normal show footage which focuses on her quite a bit anyway---

(Footage is shot from backstage)

Me: BODYGUARD. DEMAND A BODYGUARD IN UOUR NEXT CONTRACT.DO NOT PERFORM WITHOUT ONE.

-

"What a waste of time"

I know, sadmad, it is a waste of time hinting And blabbing on when the contradiction is SO PAINFULLY OBVIOUS

-

To this games credit, I actually looked thru the footage to check for the edit and it's actually there. You can see the screen skip ever so slightly. I mean it's a little improbable that Trucy was still in the same position after twirling but that's a neat little detail. Not bad, SOJ, not bad at all.

- (Snerk) sexy pan up shot for mr retinz

- I know everyone loves the 'what's crackalackin homie" line but it stinks of pandering to me

It's like mr grossberg saying his hemerhoids were doing the Harlem shake. But I don't even think they were referencing the meme back then.

Also something about the way they write Nahyuta feels like the equivalent of a foreign character saying "it is-- 'ow you say..."

-

Burger barn sounds like the shittiest restaurant on earth. I wonder if it was the Ramen Ranch in the Japanese version...

-

"It's pretty long so I'll just show you the part with.." OHHH NO. We learned our lesson in dual destinies. We watch ALL the footage, damn it.

-

That must be Trucy! ... Six seconds after she runs in the opposite direction, also shown rising up into the rafters. ‘kay. Sounds legit. Prosecutor sadmad, please call me a moron and threaten more insignificant reincarnations...

-

"It threatens to disrupt the karmic course of this case" You mean it's so bullshit that you're obviously going to lose, right? It's ok, you can just come right out and say it. Nobody will mock you.

-

huh. retinz just called sadmad ‘pretty boy’

gee whiz guess theyre gay for each other now. c’mon fandom work your magic.

-

I'm starting to really not know what the victim’s last rights actually are. could you be a lil more clear on that sadmad

-

“My OBJECTION.... is NOT FOR YOUR ENTERTAINMENT!!!”

but it sure is for mine [snicker]

also gr8 excuse there, roger

-

“every industry has its own way of doing things, just as we in the legal profession focus exclusively on evidence and testimony’

really? for some reason i thought you were more interested in The Magic Pool and The Screams of the Condemned.

-

i can see theyre trying to write sadmad funny but its just not.... funny???

even with roger’s obnoxious persona i find him funnier. his texting sprite is hilarious. he just looks so fuckin pleased with himself.

-

Lang Zi says... Nahyuta needs a different schtick.

-

( well this numbskull has a thick skin, so there )

-holds back tears-

-

phoenix, drunkenly, from the gallery: DEAD PERSON... PUNISHING SOMEONE THROUGH A SURVIVING FAMILY MEMBER..? APOLLO GEDDOWN THE FUCKIN GHOS’S ARE COMING AAAHHH

-

“not bad for a shitty soap opera twist”

yeesh, that was a very sudden bout of self-loathing from the writers.

-

poor manov. somehow i feel more sad about his death than the entirety of the victims in DD (apart from Clay that is)

i mean he was just some magician tryna make it big.

-

(sigh) they tried to do the ‘are you high’ joke again and yet they still dont understand what made it funny in the first place.

-

“Strange are the karmic threads before me...”

is that Koorahneese for ‘shit, I'm losing!!’

-

NOW I FEEL EVEN WORSE FOR MANOV

-

i love when villains do that thing where it’s obviously fucking them and a jury would haul their ass to jail in 2 seconds but since it’s the bench trial system theyre like :3c I'm not admitting to anything! I just revealed something incriminating and suspicious as fuck but since my name isn’t carved into it you cant punish me~~~

im not being sarcastic either, at this point its just funny 

-

apollo: AHH, HOW DID YOU READ MY MIND?!

roger must have assistant’s blood in him; all of them can do it 

-

ohhhh. ohhh. i think. i see how he did it. if so, shit bro; that’s fucked up. but actually a pretty good sneaky murder method, with some pretty good foreshadowing that really stuck in my mind. 

Not bad, SOJ. Not bad at all.

-

‘do you think the audience will let you get away with the twins schtick twice in a row?’

alright writers, your self deprecation is making me a little uncomfortable now.

-

i like picturing manov’s soul sitting on he judge’s head.

“could you hurry it up? I'm tired of listening to butterfly over there banging on about last rights. i just wanna see retinz get his ass kicked.”

-

wait did i completely miss something 

what the fuck is with the random tuna boat joke

did i miss a reference to it before

is it a joke on turnabout: tuna-boat ??

-

hang on. is this a half-case? 

they did this in dual destinies with the two last ones. i guess they can’t fit five full cases into a game after all... for some reason.

-

i was right! well done. thats a well written twist. anyway, most importantly:

IM STILL CRYING OVER MANOV. HE DIDNT DESERVE THIS

-

as much as i appear to like ragging on these games, i really hope the rest of the cases are as good. 

-

sadmad: you f––

writers: [shake heads vigorously and make cut-throat motions]

sadmad: ..! ..uhh... [opens up a thesaurus] dim-witted... ignorant... imbecilic?

writers: [nod and sigh in relief]

sadmad: putrid red pepper. 

-

“just some good old fashioned logic”

oh look at that they just admitted the ‘rethinking the case” mechanic is just an off brand logic rip-off.

-

wow that was the most over-the-top prosecutor breakdown I've ever seen. how did that even work? physically, i mean

maybe the soul butterfly is getting its revenge

-

NOO!!! NOT VALANT!!!

also holy shit that was one helluva hallucination. I'd like to think Magnifi was responsible from beyond the grave for one last feat in dickery. 

-

Trucy’s absolutely right and murder is 99% never justified, but Magnifi is heavily implied to be a bag of dicks. 

-

“Wow trucy, i never knew that being the best could be so tough good for your dating life’

-

“do you think I'm a naive greenhorn?” “No, she's not...”

don't use the ‘smile in spite of everything’ thing, don't use the ‘smile in spite of everything’ thing, don't use the ‘smile in spite of everything’ thing––

Ff fffffuuuuck

god dAMNIT

what is japans obsession with smiling thru shitty times??? its, like, ok to cry when you feel down, you know? its admirable to be strong in times of distress but your worth isn't based solely on how well you can pretend not to feel like shit

why not present that quick-ass thinking she did to get around Bonny’s mistake? THAT is the mark of someone who’s ready to be on stage. somebody who’s ready for any eventuality; that’s the mark of a clever performer. she kept a cool head and let the show go on; thats impressive!!!

get this shoe-horned in shit outta my face.

-

alright alright... theyre trying to have an emotional moment between siblings. ill calm down... for now.

-

Apollo: You’ve really changed Edge––– eh h I mean, Nahyuta.

Nahyuta: fuck you. 

-

trucy: you don't like to talk about your past, do you? because you always change the subject!

apollo: its not so much that i don't like to talk about it as that it’s constantly being rewritte––– 

[shotgun cocking sound from capcom]

apollo: I-ITS PARTY TIME, ITS PARTY TIME, EVERYBODY’S GETTIN DOWN BECAUSE ITS PARTY TIME

-

phoenix: you're a full fledged lawyer, apollo

apollo: aww gee thanks

phoenix: do you know the definition of full-fledged, in the bird world

apollo: uh

phoenix: it means they fly the coop. leave the nest. go to a completely different country, shall we say

apollo: ah

phoenix: just putting that out there apropos of nothing.

-

PHOENIX TALK TO YOUR FUCKING DAUGHTER. CHRIST. shit. sigh.

-

apollo is now fucking dead, and living up to the title “Spirit of Justice”