#honestly just typed love making music and downloaded the first thing that appeared

[spinach-pine]

someone started a challenge of putting romantic music on top of star trek clips to see how gay it gets. couldn't find the op so in courtesy of all that is spirk, challenge accepted.

*cough* ahem

edit: y'know, if you listen to it with your eyes closed it just adds a WHOLE DIFFERENT feeling to the thing.

[chiliiscereal]

chosen last: part three

The people asked and so they shall receive

https://chiliiscereal.tumblr.com/post/650808822043115520/chosen-last

https://chiliiscereal.tumblr.com/post/651201066386554880/chosen-last-part-two

Summary: a boy takes notice of reader for the first time and Donnie is worried that he’s bad news. Little do both of them know, he’s right

Warning: mentions of attempted rape

——-

You felt so much better about yourself when your birthday was over. It was honestly one of the best you’d ever had. Better than the ones your friends planned anyway. You still went, but it was nothing like the party that the turtles threw. You didn’t think it could get any better.

Until, that is, something happened that almost made you change your mind.

You friend put a picture of you and her, together, up on Snapchat.

And... for the first time in your life... a guy took notice of you.

It wasn’t much. It was just “who’s that? Low key cute. Whats their snap?”

That happened to your friends.

Never to you.

Even more surprising, your friend gave him your snap.

Eric.

Eric was his name.

And he also went to your school!

You were incredibly nervous about this. Every single time a boy took interest in you it never seemed to be what your thought it was.

Last time a boy took interest in you it was ACTUALLY so they could get with your friend. That, my friends, was two years ago. Your friends blasted through boys like there was no tomorrow. But you? You’d never had someone interested in you like that.

Until now.

You talked to him and... honestly... you felt like there was something there.

He asked a lot about you and just seemed like the one, you know? You both shared the same interest in shows! You both enjoyed the same music!

Whenever he responded to you, you just couldn’t help but feel elated.

You would fall back on your bed and stare at the ceiling, feeling like this was a scene from a movie.

He didn’t wait for twenty minutes to respond to you.

He acknowledged every single thing you said.

And when he met up with you after school...

Wow.

Just wow.

He was incredibly handsome and polite.

He even held doors open for you!

You found yourself meeting up with him again and again.

It made you feel so... important.

Unfortunately, the turtles didn’t feel the same way.

————

“Who ya talkin’ to?” Leo leaned closer to look over your shoulder from his spot beside you on the couch.

It was movie night with the boys and April.

You brought you phone to your chest to obscure his view. “Hey hey hey back off!” You playfully shoved him away. “Just a friend.”

Mikey gave you a shit eating grin when he noticed the smile slipping onto your face. “Just a friend huh?” He pulled himself off the floor and reached for your phone. “Let me see let me see!”

You held it away from him to. “Woah this is my phone! Get away!”

A metal claw snatched it from your hand, retracting back to Donnie.

“And is this ‘friend’ a boy or a girl?” He opened your phone. “Ugh, what’s your password?”

You leapt off the couch and tried to grab your device back. “Does it matter?”

Donnie tapped away at the buttons, using his metal claws from his battle shell to keep you away. “No, it doesn’t matter unless it’s a BOY.” You phone buzzed slightly as it opened to your home screen. “Aha, I am in!”

Mikey and Leo both crawled over to their soft shelled brother to observe from behind him.

“Donnie, give it back.” You ordered, looking to April for help. She just shrugged and continued watching with a smirk. “Guys, come on! It’s not a big deal!”

Raph pulled himself off the floor and placed his hands on his hips. “Alright, jokes over; give the phone back.”

Donnie groaned. “Come on! I’m so close to figuring out who y/n’s talking to!”

Raph gave him a stern look. “Now. It’s private and obviously Y/n doesn’t want you looking through it.”

Donnie, Mikey, and Leo all gave him giant puppy eyes.

Raph simply held out his hand.

Donnie sighed. “Fine. Here.”

You sighed as well but in relief.

Raph took it from him, glancing down at your phone. To your dismay, it was open up to messages. “Eric Sherrin?” He asked in confusion.

“AHA!” Donnie shouted in triumph. “A name is all I need!” He began typing in the device on his wrist.

“Raph!” You accused angrily.

Ugh what were you gonna do now??

You’d never hear the end of this.

“Hey! Raph’s on your side! I didn’t know he could find out with just a name!” He held up his hands in defense.

“Eric?” April asked as she swiped through her phone. “Does he go to our school?”

You glared at Donnie before you decided whether or not to share that.

He shrugged. “Hey, I already have his social media up and every piece of information I could find. Whether or not you say will change nothing.”

“Fine.” You growled. “Yes, he goes to our school. He’s a mutual friend with my other friends.”

April raised a brow. “And that’s supposed to make me feel better.”

You shrugged. “Maybe.”

“Well it doesn’t.”

April was dead set on despising your friends. You knew she had good reason but you didn’t need it brought up now.

Leo took the computer that Donnie had sent all the information to, scrolling through Eric’s social media. “Wow, there are a lot of pictures of him holding fish.” He snorted. “Does he think that’s gonna impress people or something?”

“I’ve never understood the appeal.” Donnie shook his head. “So what? You killed an animal good for you.”

“I think it’s about killing a BIG animal.” Leo squinted at the screen. “There’s also lots of pictures of him with other girls.”

“Guys can you just stop?” You placed your hands on your hips. “It’s sweet that you’re trying to make sure he’s not some idiot but you’re invading his privacy-!”

“Woah, look what I found in his records from the school.” Donnie waved his brothers closer.

Even Raph and April did so.

“He harassed at girl at school?” Mikey repeated as he read the screen. “Really?”

“Yeah no this guy’s bad news.” Donnie shook his head in disappointment. “Y/n, give me your phone. I’ll block him for you.” He even reached his hand out expectantly.

You held your phone closer. “No, that’s just a rumor that spread at school.”

The boys stopped what they were doing.

“You knew?” Leo narrowed his eyes. “And you’re still interested?”

“He told me that the teachers didn’t believe him.” You responded as you crossed your arms. “Some girl made it up cause she didn’t like him.”

“You can’t take that risk.” Raph crossed his arms.

“Raph, I thought you were in my side!” You protested.

“That was before Raph found out that the guy harassed someone.” He defended. “Come on, you know this can’t end good.”

Your stomach burned with anger.

Anger that they felt they could order you around like that.

That they wouldn’t even let you figure it out yourself.

That this might end just like every other romantic interest would.

“Why won’t you just let me handle this myself?” You stuffed your hands in your pockets and flopped back down in the couch.

Mikey crawled into the spot next to you, wrapping his arms around you. “You’re one of our best friends! We don’t want anything to happen to you!” He gave you wide innocent eyes as if that would erase your anger.

Well... it did.

Curse him and his adorable eyes.

You rolled your eyes and hugged him back. “I know. I just want to figure this out myself.” You gave Donnie a hard glare as your rested your chin on Mikey’s shoulder.

“Fine.” He closed all the tabs on his computer grudgingly. “But I know this is just gonna end in heartbreak.”

“What a vote of confidence.” Leo snorted and plopped down in the spot next to you.

He smirked when you ignored him, still hugging Mikey.

“Hey, come on, you know you can’t stay mad at this face.” He leaned against you dramatically. “I’m the face man! You can’t resist me!” He pulled you away from Mikey and draped his arm over your shoulder. “You know you love me.”

You turned your head away from him, more playful now than spiteful.

“Come onnnnn...” he smirked. “You love meeee...”

You shoved him off the couch with a laugh. “I’m still thinking that over.”

Raph quickly took Leo’s seat as his younger brother rubbed the spot he’d landed on.

“No hard feelings?” Raph rested his arm on the couch behind you as he started the movie back up.

“Fine. No hard feelings.”

Leo moved so he was sitting on the floor and leaning against your legs.

You couldn’t stay mad at them. Well, except Donnie. You could very well stay mad at Donnie.

And it seemed that Donnie could stay mad at you as well. He left the room with all his tech, grumbling something under his breath.

“I already know how this is gonna end.” He grumbled.

“Love you to, Donnie.” You muttered, sinking into the couch.

Whatever.

He’d get over it soon enough.

————

Donnie didn’t get over it.

Whenever you came over to hang out he brought it up again casually. Well, as casually as Donnie could be, which wasn’t very casual at all.

“Ugh, this game sucks!” Mikey shouted at the tv once.

“Not as much as Eric What’s-his-face’s record.” He’d commented, giving you a glance out of the corner of his eye.

Or even:

“Ugh you can’t trust those pop up ads.” Raph told Leo when his phone had downloaded a virus after he clicked an ad.

“Just like how you can’t trust Eric.” He’d ran into the room to spit that out.

If Raph ever asked how things were going with Eric, Donnie either magically appeared next to him with a hopeful look or disappear with a groan.

You and Eric weren’t even together.

But... you hoped you would be soon.

He invited you to a party that Friday! And he’d specified that he’s invited you as his date.

Your friends were excited, surprisingly. They wanted to help you find an outfit and everything.

Finally, you felt like things were going right.

Why couldn’t Donnie just be happy for you?

——-

“Why won’t you come?” You begged April as she flopped down onto your bed.

“You’ve got Eric and all of your other friends.” She waved you off. “Besides, you know I hate parties.” She sat up slightly. “And Eric gives me the heebie jeebies.”

You rolled your eyes and held out a dress. “Yeah, yeah. Fine, I won’t make you.”

April touched the fabric of the dress with a frown. “Is this what your friends picked out for you? I thought you didn’t like dresses?”

You shrugged. “They said Eric would like it and that it looked good on me.”

April fully sat up now. “But you’re gonna be so uncomfortable in that!”

“I mean, it’s supposed to be pretty, not comfy, right?” You shrugged, slipping it on over your head. “Does it look good?” You gave her a small twirl.

“Of course it’s pretty... but its a little... much.” She shook her head. “Does Eric really deserve to see you in that?”

The last bit was playful but still...

“I think so.” You say down beside her. “I’m just so incredibly nervous and I don’t know if this is a bad idea.”

You felt exposed.

But, you also trusted that the people at the party could be trusted with that.

April draped her arm over your shoulder. “Well you look stunning.”

You smiled back at her. “Thanks.”

“Alright, girl, your party’s in twenty minutes. Ready to head out?” She jabbed her thumb in the direction of the door.

You stood up and smoothed out the dress. “Ready.”

———

You stood in front of the house nervously. You could hear the music and see the lights and people dancing. You just didn’t know if you actually were ready.

“You look hot, y/n.” Your friend told you, glancing at one of your other friends. “He’s gonna love it.”

You didn’t really love it, but if he liked it then so would you.

“Hope so.” You muttered, checking your phone.

Donnie sent you a simple text:

Don’t trust Eric and keep pepper spray on hand.

Wow, such confidence.

You ignored it and stuffed your phone in the dress pocket. You didn’t need that. You needed all the confidence you could muster.

“Wow.” A voice said from behind you, causing you to jump.

There was Eric, dressed nicely and with a charming smile on his face.

“You look hot.” He grinned.

Your stomach fluttered. “Oh, thank... thank you!”! You smoothed it out nervously.

You didn’t know if your stomach felt this way out of nerves or out of feelings for him. You really couldn’t tell.

He placed his hand over your hip and pulled you to his side. “Well Let’s head on in! Can’t wait to show you off.”

Your stomach jumped. “Well, I just wanted to wait a little,” he opened the door and dragged you in, “oh okay!”

Your friends and Eric were at your side the whole time.

You still felt as if you were on display while you and your group were dancing.

You still felt like the dress was too short when you and Eric sat down on the couch.

You felt like he was staring at you when you noticed the couples in the room kissing and making out.

“You wanna head upstairs?” He asked as he took your hand.

Your heart jumped. “No, no I’m good. Really.”

“Come on.” He nodded his head in the direction of the stairs. “It’ll be fun!”

You shook your head. “No I don’t want to go upstairs.”

He looked disappointed but you stayed confident with your choice. You didn’t want that and you weren’t ready.

He recovered quickly and dropped your hand. “Alright! I’m just gonna go talk to a friend real quick, I’ll be back.”

You sighed in relief when you realized he wouldn’t push it on you.

He got up and you pulled out your phone, trying to decide if you wanted to text Donnie back.

You settled on typing:

Yeah yeah whatever.

You saw he read it but he didn’t respond.

What was with him?

Why couldn’t he just be happy?

You glanced up, noticing Eric talking to one of your friends. You noticed him glance back at you and then back at your friend. She handed him something and he left to go to the kitchen.

You went back to your phone, waiting to see if Donnie would respond.

You just wanted your friend back.

Why couldn’t he just... ugh no you had to stop asking that. He was being too judgemental and untrusting.

There was nothing untrustworthy about Eric.

He was just being crazy...

You glanced up again, noticing Eric at the drink table. Whatever it was your friend had given him, he was slipping it in his drink.

You looked closer.

It was some sort of... powder?

When he turned back around you immediately acted like you hadn’t been watching.

He made his way to you and sat down, a drink in each hand. “I thought you looked a little thirsty, so I got you a soda!”

He handed you the red cup enthusiastically.

No, he couldn’t be trying to spike your drink. He wouldn’t do that.

But he was looking at you so expectantly.

“Oh, thank you!” You swirled the soda suspiciously. “I’m pretty sure I’m allergic to corn syrup so... sorry.” You set the drink back down.

Again, he looked disappointed. Maybe even a little mad.

“Hey, We’re gonna go upstairs and play a game!” Your friend shouted from across the room. “Wanna join?”

“What game?” You asked, feeling incredibly nervous.

“Truth or dare!” She giggled. “You’ll love it!”

Eric jumped on that idea expectantly. “Come on lets go!”

“I don’t really...”

He pulled you up before you could even finish.

You wanted to stay where people could see you!

But... you WERE gonna be with your friends...

“Alright, Fine.” You settled. “I’ll go.”

“Awesome!”

You and your group headed up and down the hallway.

Your friend opened the door for you and let you in first. Eric followed closely behind you.

It was a bedroom. A very dark bedroom.

“Hey, We’re gonna head down to the bathroom and freshen up first.” One of your friends smirked. “You two have fun!”

“Wait, no-!”

They were already gone and the door was shut.

Eric had gotten you upstairs.

Alone.

————-

Donnie sighed, trying hard to focus on his work. “Why can’t y/n just listen to me.” He groaned to himself. “I’m just trying to help! How does that make me the bad guy?”

He continued wiring his latest invention, frustrated at how he kept messing up.

“It’s not gonna end well.” He growled. “It’s gonna end in heartbreak and I’m gonna have to pick up the pieces.”

“If y/n even trusts you with that.” Leo added from behind him, causing him to jump.

“Nardo, how long have you been standing there?” He glowered at him. “I’m busy.”

Leo held up his hands in surrender. “A while. Anyway, you’re just pushing y/n away.”

“But y/n isn’t listening to me!” He protested, dropping his tool. “I’m right!”

“Maybe, but you’re also being a jerk.” He shrugged. “Maybe she’ll get her heart broken but you could at least be there for support.”

“Oh no no no I’m not supporting that relationship.” He shook his head vigorously and picked up his screwdriver.

“Not the relationship, egghead.” Leo rolled his eyes. “Our friend?”

“Oh.” Donnie tapped the table in thought. “Yeah, I guess I shouldn’t have left y/n on read...”

“...And maybe go apologize?” Leo prompted.

“No she’s at a party.” He glanced around his phone, checking your location again. “Actually...” he leaned closer to stare at his screen, “y/n’s not at the party any more.”

“Perfect!” Leo clasped his hands together. “Go apologize!”

“It can’t wait?”

“Go!”

———-

You sat on the rooftop, clutching your jacket to your body and watching the city.

How could you have been so stupid.

How could have let something like that happen.

It was incredibly cold on the rooftop but you didn’t want to move. You didn’t want to go home. You CERTAINLY didn’t want to go to the lair either.

You just wanted to watch the city and pretend everything was okay again.

Why did you have to get your hopes up.

No one ever took interest in you like that unless they wanted something from you.

“Scoff, there you are!” Said the last person you wanted to talk to. “I thought you were in the building and spent about an hour searching for you.”

“Tracking device?” You asked, not even looking at him.

“Yep.” Donnie confirmed. “Now, might I inquire why you’re out here?” He glanced at his watch. “And not at your party?”

You stayed quiet.

“Something happen with Eric?”

You gave him nothing.

“I knew it!” He jumped up and cheered. “I was right! I was RIGHT! Ha!”

His every word made you feel colder and more embarrassed.

“I knew from the start! I knew he was untrustworthy!” He continued. “Eat that!”

Finally, he calmed down enough to sit next to you.

“Now, tell me, what did he do?” He leaned close expectantly. “Did he cheat? Did he kiss a girl? Did he try to get with one of your friends? Did he-?”

“He tried to rape me.” You spat out, bringing your knees to your chest.

Well I’m out of room XD

Part four up soon!

[book-o-scams]

Ed, Edd n Eddy Series Bible (1996) -Analysis-

You can all finally read/download Ed, Edd n Eddy's official Series Bible right here! Thanks again to Chuckletons for sharing this with me and to Joey/Kongiscool0518 for sharing it in the first place, the Holy Grail of lost Ed, Edd n Eddy trivia!

One of the first posts I made for this blog was the Series Bible page. It was a composite of every source we had ever seen reference the series bible so far-- storyboarders in interviews, CN's old character guides, and the biggest source, an old CN UK posting about the show. Well, I figure now that we have the official source, I better update the old page (so everyone knows it's out of date), and make this new Series Bible post using the official source! Not much new information, but I was intrigued to finally learn the true phrasings of some things we had only heard paraphrased, as well as at least one detail from the movie that I couldn't believe came up this early in conception...

Unfortunately, Tumblr has apparently updated its post system to only let me add 10 images? Gonna try and only use images for what I need since you can read the actual document above, I guess I'll transcribe it too for easier reference and so we don't ever lose some archive of this.

Quickly, let's review what a series bible is:

A series bible is how creators pitch shows to networks. They can be called “pitch bibles” as well. Bibles do not usually get posted publicly, because they are initially under a strict Non-Disclosure Agreement by the network; also the creator may simply not wish to share it because it reflects the earliest stages of development.

The pitch materials typically include early concepts for characters, locations and episodes. Sometimes it exposes secrets, in this case, Ed and Eddy’s home lives, and sometimes the stuff in it is completely abandoned because it’s so early in production, in this case, casual references to school and adults.

Alright, everybody, it's time to gather 'round and read the Ed, Edd n Eddy Bible!

THE YEAR IS 1996.

YOUR NAME IS LINDA SIMENSKY. YOU WORK AT CARTOON NETWORK. A FRIEND OF YOURS, DANNY ANTONUCCI, IS WRAPPING UP A SHOW ON MTV. YOU GET THIS FAX.

Linda Simensky immediately fell in love with this concept because as a child, she was best friends with 2 other Lindas for seemingly no reason other than the shared name.

I love how Danny decided last second to pencil in the correct names over each Ed, since they're arranged out of title-order.

"They're friends because they have the same name."

-the Logline for the series.

Fun fact: one storyboard artist for the movie observed that the movie is essentially all about challenging the series' original notion that the Eds are friends ONLY because of their name.

"A Danny Antonucci Cartuna"

-the label Danny used to use under announcements of new productions.

PAGE 1:

Ed, Edd n Eddy

They're best friends because they have the same name.

A gag laden, beat generated CARTOON bumper car ride of 3 misfit youths on a cul-de-sac in the suburbs of America.

Through summer vacation, part-time jobs, or just hang'n out at the corner mail box, they want to belong....but CAN'T.

From home chores, helping neighbors or eating jaw breakers, they want to fit in...but CAN'T.

Ed is into "B" monster movies, model kits and is quick to break out into rashes.

Lots of luck...

Edd is into chemistry, biology and prone to crushes.

Later...

Eddy is into pranks, is stylish and flaunts himself to the world.

Ya Right...

Ed, Edd n Eddy is a show about confusion and contradiction, that awkward part of youth, pimples, big feet, oily hair and... girls???.

Puberty is unforgiving.

I was fascinated by the lack of art on this page, it makes the pitch feel very focused. AKA logo in the corner, the title logo again up top, then the logline appears again below.

I really love the breakdown of Danny's vision of the show. "Gag-laden, beat-generated, CARTOON bumper ride." Very accurate, and I think "beat-generated" is the phrase that interests me the most. I typically think of "animation beats" as sort of a give-in-- technically all things fit a rhythm, so all stories are essentially just a montage of beats. But this does make me realize how important the strength of the beats and their rhythm are to the pacing of a cartoon and making you feel like "that was a good one." I feel like the "seasonal rot" viewers feel over the course of a show, and the way that perception differs from person to person, depends on the type of beats you want. Even though I am very into the experimental beats of a show in its later seasons, I can definitely see how season 1's beats are more typically appealing to a wide-audience, and how important a focus on that is to the longevity of a show.

I found it really interesting how the scams are initially conceived of here as "summer jobs." It adds to the sense that adults were originally meant to be present. Honestly a little surprised nobody with access to this bible had ever thought to mention that-- scams are not referenced ANYWHERE. Their image in the Series Bible is that they have summer jobs and help neighbors, which is certainly a much cleaner reputation than the Eds ended up with in the show. Makes me realize though, were some of the early scams, like Ed's Hive Bee Gone and their newspaper routes, supposed to be leaning into this early idea of them with almost legit jobs for unseen adults?

I was very amused by the repeated phrase that the Eds simply CAN'T fit in.

Loved to finally see the official phrasing for the confirmation that Peach Creek is in America. Not much different than I was led to believe, but still nice to have the true quote.

Also love Eddy being described as "stylish and flaunting himself to the world." The bold-print reactions to each micro-description is a cute idea too, I truly wonder who we were meant to picture saying those things in reaction. Each Ed? Kevin?

The "corner mail box" is an oddly specific phrase-- the Eds do hang around mailboxes throughout the series, especially seasons 1-3, and I believe the canon map does have a corner mailbox, but the idea that the Eds hang out at one specific mailbox went the way of Bro's supposed secret treehouses.

PAGE 2:

Ed, Edd n Eddy

Show Description

Gag laden. True cartoon style, inventive, non parody, fast paced, stretch and squash

Beat driven. (even when characters stop they hold with a bounce cycle. Adults never bounce. Music can play important part, not just fill.) But not a musical.

Cartoon surrealism. (viewers see the show as Ed, Edd n Eddy would, less important things tend to blend into the background, while objects of Ed, Edd n Eddy's desires are focused. Premise driven.)

The school year's over, (yeah!!!!) and the long HOT summer vacation begins (gulp). What to do?

Stuck on a cul-de-sac in the suburbs of America is the last place you want to spend summer break, especially when you find life confusing and contradicting.

Ed, Edd n Eddy is about friendship, and serves to remind us that they're no "good ole days," just smelly runners.

You can tackle anything, when your with your pals.

Their days are spent, for knowledge, acceptance and some cash for jaw breakers. Armed with pimples, big feet and oily hair the three amigos trek into the unknown.

Ed, Edd n Eddy are dying to be grown-ups, but they're kids, and attack adulthood as only kids would. Simple situations turn into a manic rollercoaster ride. (Don't forget your barf bag).

They just want to belong, and they're willing to pull off any insane stunt to prove it. First they need to figure out what it is they want to belong to.

Found it interesting that on this page, the show's logo is replaced with the title written in a jumbled font. Seems like the font from the show's end credits.

Hehe, the continued reactions to the descriptions. Allow me to be Double D for a moment and point out the increased use of parentheticals on this page, as well as one wrong "your".

I love Danny's insight that season 1 is framed by the context of how hyped everyone still is just to be out of school, but also the sense of pressure to make use of their break.

I really appreciate Danny getting further into the details of his summary of the show's style on the previous page. It only makes sense that he had this much of a vision that early.

A second confirmation of the cul-de-sac being in America! I'm also really into the repeated focus on the Eds finding the world "contradicting." I always loved how EEnE's inexplicable cartoon antics supported that sense that the Eds are highly aware of contradictions in both societal things and the actual characters.

WOW, so I'm fascinated by this dual reveal. Before the wiggling outlines, which Danny usually calls a "boiling line" and describes as a tribute to wiggling inking in early animation, the series bible instead refers to him wanting the characters to do the iconic Fleischer "bounce," which is a much more commonly recognized rubberhose animation technique. Very interesting that Danny decided not to stick to that. Did it feel too out of place? Or was the overseas team not willing to animate a weight-shifting for every single held pose? Haha, guess I can see why boiling was an easier compromise. I wonder if he had any other ideas for how to make it more of a 1930s cartoon.

The other reveal to me here is that the movie's choice, that adults don't always wiggle in the show, was an idea from the very beginning! I guess I can better understand now why it's just too difficult to communicate a stylistic choice like that overseas-- no point making Bro not wiggle, that'd just create confusion.

Also, really disappointed that my wish for a musical is officially squashed in the series bible itself. That's a tragedy. The show's over, ya couldn't let me dream, Danny!? Conversely, I love Danny's forethought to say "non parody," I definitely noticed and appreciated EEnE's avoidance of derivative parody humor.

My spouse had to point out to me that Danny probably means sneakers here, lol. Canadianisms!

The comments about the Eds wanting to grow up but needing to figure out what they want to belong to are so great and relate to the movie so well. I've heard those comments before, but the correct phrasing was cool to see.

PAGE 3:

Ed, Edd n Eddy (image of Ed in right corner)

Character Description

Ed

Attention deficiency syndrome.

He has trouble...

He can't....um...

OK, he draws all day in class.

When Eddy gets a bright idea...Ed's in.

Ed is easily talked into doing Eddy's "hard work". He has great physical strength.

Ed's happiest with his Model kits and B-monster movies. He draws his knowledge from his movies.

Ed smells. Flies are attracted to him.

Ed has sayings for all situations

ED: "you can change your shirt, and Bingo was his name..."

Ed's perpetually a slave to his younger sister's whims and whines.

Ed may have to baby-sit his sister, or let her watch whatever she wants on TV, or let her dress him up in mom's clothes.

Ed breaks out in Rashes. He's allergic to practically everything, especially Guinea Pigs.

Ed's Mom xerox's his sketches and doodles for her therapist.

Ed's Dad hopes to pass on to his son, his knowledge on "pre-owned" auto sales.

Very cute bit wasting the space at the top of the page. Danny seems very invested in Ed's personality already. The old sources we used to have definitely tried to condense these down to simpler blurbs.

Weird how Danny wants to essentially diagnose Ed with ADHD here (phrasing it very poorly, but it was the 90s and... Canada?). I don't know enough on the subject to debate it, but I still gotta point out Ed's canonical cracked skull!

Interested in the comment about Ed being most allergic to Guinea Pigs. I don't think that animal was ever even mentioned in the show. Eddy mentioned an old gerbil once....

Neat to finally have the real phrasing of the official word on Ed's parents! I saw someone comment earlier that this seems to be hinting Ed's Dad is selling stolen cars. I've never thought to question the legality of his apparent second-hand-car dealership (I imagined he works with Eddy's dad, who has received a legitimate award for his salesmanship), but those quotation marks are certainly making Mr. Ed's practices questionable! Best case scenario, Danny meant that more like italics or something, but maybe Ed's dad IS up to no good...

PAGES 4 & 5 (Ed's turn sheet and expression sheet)

PAGE 6:

Ed, Edd n Eddy (image of Edd in right corner)

Character Description

Edd

is really smart.

is really quiet.

Edd is unnaturally-- polite.

Edd hasn't been allowed to take gym ever since the Dodge ball incident. He's been excused to free study time in the library.

Edd doesn't like it when people touch his things.

EDD: "You may enter in my room, but don't touch my Lego robot. Thank you."

Edd's learning to play Peddle steel guitar. (his Mom makes him)

Edd's prone to "crushes". Girls in School, in his neighborhood, TV, anatomy books. He mails "true loves" his socks.

Edd is always ready for action, even though he can calculate the implications.

Edd constantly mumbles.

No one ever sees Edd's parents. They both work nights. They communicate to their son solely through Post-it notes. Edd's not allowed to touch anything in the house while they're gone. Anything.

Interesting how Danny slightly differentiates the barely-used space at the top here from Ed's description, to characterize Edd as more quiet and mumbly, adding an awkward "--" mid-sentence, perhaps to create the impression that Edd halts to choose words carefully.

Everything on this page feels familiar, from the character guides and other old sources. The most interesting thing to me here is that Edd's Mom forcing him to practice Pedal Steel Guitar is established this early, don't think I knew that, but I had noticed that it existed in his room from ep 1.

I love how the explanation in the beginning for why Edd goes along with their dumb schemes even though he's smart is basically just "he's always ready for action." ?!? I guess in a way???

That weirdly phrased Edd quote amuses me because it references Lego, just like the original concept background for his room before somebody nixed the copyright-namedrop.

Edd's prone to crushes thing has been reaffirmed over and over in character bios even though it really doesn't come up outside of the cupid magic in HPH and the pilot-episode heart eyes at Sarah that are barely canon. Still, I've always loved the truly disturbing statement that he mails "his true loves his socks" and how that managed to make it into canon with a comic book example, a cel animation example and a digital era example.

PAGES 7 & 8 (Edd's turn sheet and expression sheet)

PAGE 9:

Ed, Edd n Eddy (image of Eddy in right corner)

Character Description

Eddy

Exhibitionist.

Megalomaniac. (quote from his report card)

Eddy is the unofficial leader of the trio.

He's always got a plan, a stunt or a weird noise.

Eddy's the "class clown". He loves showing off. He loves being the centre of attention-- no matter how stupid the reason is.

Eddy is the only kid in his grade to have been expelled for aw hole week from school. It was his turn to set up the video for science class. He switched "Our Friend Yeast", for a video he "borrowed" from his parent's room.

Before Eddy's brother went....away, he enlightened Eddy with the "legends" of the neighbourhood. Eddy knows where all the abandoned tree houses are, which sewer pipers are safe to spelunk, and the secret recipe for the "El Mongo Stink Bomb" (it's been in the family for years).

He is the one who is most able to pretend that he knows it all... and doesn't care what anyone else thinks about him.

His genes are working the fastest.

Eddy's Dad is constantly concerned that Eddy may grow up to be a ...figure skater.

Eddy's Mom never believes his little darling was involved in such a heinous act.

Funny choice that Eddy's wasted-top-space is just two one-word descriptions, and allegedly lazily swiped from his negative report card.

Wow, we knew the report card quote and the "Our Friend Yeast" story from the UK show guide, but now we also know Ed's page says that Ed draws in class, and now I realize that Ed and Eddy have series bible school blurbs to match Edd's classic dodgeball incident blurb. Anyway, it's great that Eddy's showed his entire school some sort of sex video his parents have.

Very interested that the phrasing for the Bro/El Mongo Stink Bomb blurb even seems to suggest it's a family recipe. Eddy's Dad did have prankster stuff in his closet in JJJ... did Bro learn his prankster ways from Dad?? The neighborhood's secret tree houses have come up in other descriptions (at best, I'd say this could be related to that creepy shack the Eds found in the woods), but I think it's new info that Eddy personally learned the sewer routes from Bro. Interesting...

Thankfully, I had already heard about the Bible's awkward reference to Eddy being the most pubescent as "his genes are working the fastest," lmao.

Once again the Double D in me comes out to point out that the description of Eddy's Mom seems to switch to the Dad's pronouns.

PAGES 10 & 11 (Eddy's turn sheet and expression sheet)

PAGES 12-14 (Sarah, Jimmy, Rolf, Jonny, Nazz, and Kevin lineup of all 6, then 2 zoomed in lineups of the first 3 kids and last 3 kids)

(Funfact: the kids' designs were allegedly freelanced to an outside studio, hence why their refined later-season designs are so different from these lizardy starting places, lmao)

PAGE 15: (images of Sarah and Jimmy next to their blurbs)

SARAH

Ed's baby Sister.

It's her way or the Highway.

She has everything done for her, if NOT she'll "make" them do it.

She can be quick to judge.

Whinney.

A tatrum for every occasion.

More than a handful for Ed...or Edd and Eddy.

Thinks Edd is kinda cute.

Wants Eddy to MOVE...to another planet.

JIMMY

Sarah's best friend

He is always playing with girls, boys are just too tough.

He is accident prone, when ever we see him he has a different affliction, ie: band-aids, patches, casts, lumps...etc.

He is very clean.

The Ed's frighten him, "They're such brutes".

I'm surprised how much of the UK guide was accurate to what was really in the bible for them! Also surprised Danny misspelled "whiney" and "tantrum," one right after the other. Is this how Sarah spells them? ...Sorry, Danny, I yam what I yam.

PAGE 16: (images of Rolf and Jonny next to their blurbs)

ROLF

First generation of a landed immigrant family.

Nationality not important.

He's proud of his heritage.

He has peculiar traditions and/or customs.

He eats "weird" things.

He has hair on his back..... "yuck".

He confuses the Ed's to no end.

He confuses the other kids to no end.

JONNY 2x4

He is a wanderer and very inquisitive

From early morning to supper time, he is always outside playing, with his buddy, "Plank".

"Plank" is a wooden board that Jonny drew a face on with a crayon.

Jonny has wonderful conversations with Plank. ...Plank is a piece of wood.

Jonny makes himself very "accessible" to the Ed's.

Found it interesting that Rolf's bio is less clearly phrased than the UK bio set it up to be-- there they made it sound more like he mixes up who the Eds/kids are, here it's unclear whether it means that or (more likely) just means the obvious statement that everyone finds him confusing. If it's that, what a lame hollow bio Rolf got. This kid's based on you Danny, show some of that personal side!

Always loved Jonny's description, his life sounds so cute. Playing outside literally all day. Interesting to have it confirmed that Jonny drew Plank's face, I preferred to think the Eds drew him and sold him to Jonny, but whatever.

"Accessible" has always been an important vague description of Jonny to me. It really only applies to how chummy they could be with him in season 1, but it still sorta applies to his personality throughout the series as well.

PAGE 17: (images of Nazz and Kevin next to their blurbs)

NAZZ

She's cool, calm and assertive.

She is the most matured of the kids, or so she thinks.

She's into make-up and fashion magazines and Boys.

Sarah thinks she's awesome, wants to be just like her when she grows up.

When she enters a scene, all activity stops... boys freeze, they sweat, their hearts beat faster and faster. They lose their ability to talk. When she leaves, they recover and conclude it was something They ate.

She thinks the Ed's are funny.

KEVIN

He is cynical and sarcastic.

He thinks he knows the "routine". That's because he watches "60 Minutes".

It got a big laugh out of me that Kevin's description is only 2 sentences long. Nazz even has a more detailed character description from inception than Kevin. Love this for them.

Who's the Eds' rival? Well, he's cynical, sarcastic and he watches 60 Minutes, doesn't that tell you enough!?

I love the "mature... or so she thinks" remark about Nazz, a grounded flaw for her to have, being a little overcommitted to being mature like Eddy. It also perhaps suggests naiveté that makes it a little more reasonable that they didn't notice they were dumbing her down at the end of the series, but I do think the movie version of her better reflects the Bible's concept.

PAGE 18:

The Other Neighborhood Kids

Lineup of May, Lee and Marie.

The Kanker Sisters

These gals are tough. They bother, bully, provoke and bewilder everyone.

They live in a motor home park on the other side of the Cul-de-sac. The other kids have never been there.

They are proud of their Tammy Faye Baker memorabilia.

Their project "Cooking with Ketchup" closed down their school for a whole week.

No one likes them, especially the Eds.

They are determined to marry the Eds. They want them to do their dishes.

Amused that the Kankers are essentially being labeled backgrounds characters here, the role they mostly fell into in season 5. "Other" neighborhood kids...

I love that the Kankers have a school blurb to match each of the Eds', and that theirs has similar destructive-intentions to Eddy's video premiere story.

I believe all of this was all known from the UK guide as well, but still, neat stuff!

PAGES 19 & 20 (zoomed in Kanker lineup and their height chart with the Eds)

PAGES 21 & 22 (early promo art that used to be on CN's old Eds webpage, the art of the Eds eating jawbreakers at the end of ep 1 with the overhead text "Ed, Edd n Eddy love JAWBREAKERS!!!", and the art of the Eds all running with overhead text "Ed, Edd n Eddy see something shiny...."Jiggers." That weird "jiggers" statement at the end was normally edited out and I don't know what it means. Looked it up and it seems to be Chinook jargon (like when Ed said he was "skookum at X's and O's") usually said in the same sense as "CHEESE IT!")

PAGES 23+:

The rest of the pages in that bible download are from a 2004 storyboard test. The storyboard sample "It's Raining Eds," which we've seen some submitted samples of before, interpretations with Ed attempting to fly or chew gum and Edd making radioactive gum, I was surprised to find out the outline is just the original outline for the opening sequence to season 3's 'For Your Eds Only', seemingly Jonny was not written into the original outline (or was excised for easier testing purposes) but Kevin's brief cameo was. Now I wonder if they knew this would be used for a test when they wrote it, and if they would've come up with a less random way to include him if weren't forced to be a concise bit for testing's sake. (Your limit is typically 40 storyboard pages in my experience.)

I also noticed that in the included background references, the anonymous adult neighbor house next door to Ed's is officially just referred to as a "generic house."

My analysis ends here, but be sure to download that sometime and enjoy all the raw storyboard sketches at the end of the document!

[regrettablewritings]

Preferences: Guilty Pleasures

Characters: Okoye, Lucifer Morningstar, Dewey Finn, Peter B. Parker, Ahkmenrah

Okoye

Okoye is straightforward and stony upon first impressions. And, admittedly, even afterward. The only real difference is that, if one gets to know her better, they might find shock in the fact that in spite of her appearance, she Dora leader actually likes sweets. However, it’s not sweet things in general that Okoye feels guilty for enjoying: It’s Starbucks.

Starbucks is the antithesis of everything Okoye is associated with: Supremely un-Wakandan, a chain establishment, and overall just not worth the absurd cost. Not to mention superbly unhealthy when compared to the rest of a fighter’s typical diet. But yet you can bet that every time she needs to go out of the country or off-continent, there’s an invasive shout for joy at the possibility that she might be able to get her hands on a Frappucino (followed by an internal scolding).

She can’t even explain exactly why she likes it; there are plenty of good, even healthier sweet things back in Wakanda -- heck, back anywhere else!

But it’s a bit like when someone craves the cheap taste of school pizza over a legit pie cooked in a stone hearth: She just loves the sugary sweetness, the application of whipped cream to an already tooth-rottingly saccharine icy drink, the addition of chocolate. But Bast, she also hates it. But ever since T’Challa practically shoved a grande cup of caramel frappucino into her hands, she hasn’t felt entirely the same.

Against her better judgement, she’s more or less unintentionally tried 45% of the menu drink-wise. She doesn’t particularly care much for the food part of the establishment, though if she should ever find herself in one during the fall, she might indulge in a chunky slice of pumpkin bread under the conviction that it’s healthy enough for being gourd-related. Never mind that it’s just a cinnamon mixture with more sugar than actual pumpkin-derived anything.

Really, of all those mentioned on this list, Okoye is the one who probably feels the most disappointed in herself whenever she indulges in her guilty pleasure: It’s a betrayal to her patriotism, to her dignity, and to her attempts to eat healthy. But damn, if this type of betrayal doesn’t taste so addicting . . .

Lucifer Morningstar

The thing about Lucifer is that it’s actually a bit hard for him to feel any regrets over liking anything; he’s the Devil, after all, so his whole thing is about embracing the things that make you feel good. And even besides that, he’s mostly managed to skate by in his time on Earth by categorizing things as Stuff He Likes, Stuff He Tolerates, Stuff He Doesn’t Bother With, and Stuff Humans Seem to Enjoy But He Doesn’t Quite Get. It’s a tad restricted of a system but you can’t argue with results.

However, just because something is difficult doesn’t mean that it’s impossible. The Devil can, in fact, recognize absurdity in liking certain things. Hence why, to a point, he’s fallen prey to his own bizarre pleasures: The Devil has guilty pleasures, and it’s in stupid YouTube videos, Vine, and TikTok.

After he finally drank the Kool-Aid and got himself a smart phone, it was only a matter of time before Lucifer fell down the rabbit hole that is YouTube prank videos and strange uploads about nonsense and animal humor. It was also only a matter of time before he found himself stumbling into Vine compilations. The Celestial is terrifically mystified by the creative power of humans, managing to tell entire stories and peak comedy in only a span of seven seconds. But he’s also quite loathe to have realized it’s been long defunct by the time he’s discovered it.

He’s even more loathe to find himself making references in his daily life: He has actually quietly blurted out, “I sure hope it does” in response to seeing a Road Work Ahead sign, causing Chloe some confusion (and Lucifer lots of embarrassment). He has referred to a culprit as “Jared, Age 19″. Since discovering Vine, there has been at least one night wherein he and a bed mate were sitting there with barbecue sauce on his tiddies, but that was by sheer coincidence.

But eventually the Vine compilation well dried up, and the inevitable transfer over to TikTok happened. And Luci honestly doesn’t know what to make of TikTok. He would describe it as Vine’s Molly-addicted cousin based on its obsession with dancing, but the dances are so stationary that even that doesn’t seem quite right. The videos on the platform are also much more . . . bizarre. And some of them admittedly trigger a fight-or-flight response in him, to which he always chooses the third option of freezing if only so he can keep watching the train wreck unfold before his eyes.

The trouble with TikTok, he’ll admit to himself, is that it’s not as easy to find iconic content the same way he could with Vine. However, this isn’t to say that he hasn’t found anything worth watching over and over and over again . . .

(Let’s just say the “Wolf Pack Compilation” lives in his head rent-free, and he’s both too amused by it and too overwhelmed by its vibe to try and evict it.)

Dewey Finn

Dewey is . . . a special case. Given that he associates messy living and indulging in one’s pleasure a part of the rocker lifestyle, he’s generally quick to embrace whatever makes him happy. He’s very upfront about his interests and is arguably almost incapable of feeling shame. But it’s in there: Deep down. No, not in himself -- in his Spotify. Specifically, a Spotify account made on an email he never uses because it was made specifically to create this separate, uber secret playlist.

One marked “Actual Musical Bops.”

Dewey hates musicals: They’re cheesy, uninspired, gaudy, ridiculous, totally aimed at chicks with weird fantasies that he could never aspire to, and the music is just overall unimpressive. And yet, somehow, against his music elitist nature, a handful have managed to slip through the cracks. At the very least, a handful of numbers have clawed their way past his defenses and into his ear, where they now live rent-free.

In spite of his best efforts, the problems are that he’s a New Yorker, so it’s inevitable that he hears a song or two; and also that, as an instructor (to wealthy New York tweens whose families can afford frequent tripes to the Great White Way, no less), he’s definitely going to wind up hearing about some shows and their stand-out numbers: Against his will, he knows the lyrics to “My Shot”; he has cried in the secrecy of his apartment to “When I Grow Up”; in the never-necessary reason he needs to remember how many minutes there are in a year, he sings it inside his head; hell, he’s even found himself trying to figure out the electric guitar riff from “The Phantom of the Opera” during his down time.

What’s all the more embarrassing is that, given how he presents himself as a music elitist, there’s just no way he can come back from this if anyone were to know. He has to catch himself when he finds himself humming “Johanna” in the teacher’s lounge. He scowls at himself when he can’t sleep and gives in and starts playing “No One is Alone.” He wants to kick his thick ass every time he realizes he’s excited to have stumbled across a “slime tutorial” on YouTube, this one with better quality than the last. The reason he actually put a password on his phone wasn’t out of privacy like a sensible person would, but out of a need to make sure that no one ever found out that he had downloaded the entire Beetlejuice soundtrack, including jankily-recorded songs that never made it to the official cast recording for whatever reason!

And should anyone ever find out about any of this, Dewey has a plan: “Oh, I’m doing research. I’m studying these songs so I can give the kids a lesson on what not to do as actually competent musicians.”

But the lesson would never actually come. Mainly because he keeps prolonging his “research” . . .

He’s also developed a bit of a soft spot for My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic due to some students gushing about it, but he would rather sooner die than ever be associated with the term “brony.”

Peter B. Parker

Peter is at a point where he’s too tired to really care about the idea of guilty pleasures. The way he sees it, there are bigger priorities at stake than worrying about someone finding out about your love of some hokey activity or food or form of entertainment.

Besides, he’s a New Yorker: There’s way weirder stuff for people to just not pay any real attention to. Hence why he thinks nothing of his bizarre eating habits. And no, this isn’t referring to his disastrous appetite: This is about his tendency to eat food with his hands. Foods that, well, he really should probably utilize eating utensils for.

To be fair, this habit has always existed in him in some form or another, especially since, as Spider-Man, he often needs to eat food on the go. But during the time he spent living the life of a depressed bachelor, it came out in full force. On the rare occasion he wasn’t eating a food that deserved to be eaten by hand, he often found himself loathing the idea of doing the dishes afterward. There would be days he’d feel only slightly less depressed; enough to make a box of Kraft Mac n Cheese in the pot, but not enough to avoid cutting out the middle man.

He’s thankful the craptastic apartment wasn’t also see-through because if it were, he’s positive his neighbors would’ve thought they were bearing witness to a man’s breakdown as he wept into a pot of macaroni and cheese, his hand full of the stuff, while wearing a Spider-Man costume. (And, to be fair, they actually would be.)

In addition to this, there were also those nights where he would be prepared to actually tuck in to a plate of spaghetti, only for some crime going on elsewhere in the city to drag him away. By the time he’d return, the plate would’ve been cold and his energy too depleted to want to even dream about cleaning more than he already had to.

The great news is that he’s thankfully done a 180, now able and willing (if begrudgingly) to clean up after himself. But bad news is that this feral man will still eat a fully-loaded baked potato like an apple. In a park. In front of women and children. He’s just too tired to care anymore. He’s aware of the guilt in this as a concept, but he’s also aware that he needs to take whatever happiness he can get out of whatever he does. And if that means eating everything by hand, then so be it!

Ahkmenrah

Funnily enough, Ahkmenrah doesn’t seem to experience much of any shame for enjoying the things most might feel the need to hide: He’s constantly curious and has missed out on a lot over the centuries, so why should he feel bad for wanting to indulge in them? Celebrity gossip is just a more fun version of the palace gossip he’d grown up hearing as a boy; reality TV is like watching a play, but with much more fights, less deaths, and more faulty romances; and sloppy meatball subs are like a feast for a man of his time!

Besides, he’s a king: Kings shouldn’t have to feel embarrassment over what the common folk might think.

And yet . . . It took some time, but eventually Ahkmenrah did experience it: Guilt in his pleasures.

He couldn’t even recall where it had all started. Maybe he was searching for more content to swallow after the most recent season of his new favorite show had ended? Whatever the case, he wound up biting off more than he could chew when he stumbled upon . . . fanfiction.

The adorable yet sad thing is that he didn’t even think anything of it at first. It wasn’t until he brought up a ship he’d invested his last few nights awake exploring on the computer: Nobody knew what the crap he was talking about, so of course he felt the need to explain it. But the more he talked, the more perplexed his friends looked. And the more he could feel his cheeks and ears burn.

Oh, he thought. Is this . . . embarrassment? Is that what this feels like? Oh, this is just foul.

Thankfully, nobody pressured him to keep talking about it, but the poor king sure as heck didn’t feel much of a desire to talk any further about it. But he needed to talk to somebody about his newly acquired “feels” as those online were calling them.

Joining fanfiction-oriented sites was the next obvious step, of course, but he’s experienced mixed feelings about it: On one hand, it’s nice to talk with people who share similar views and excitement about a fictional couple. But on the other, the digital wars that have broken out both disturb him and bring out the worst in him.

Like, of course there are bigger things to deal with than whether or not So-So is better off with Him-Ham, but if you truly think that Blah-Blah and Himhaw are a healthy relationship, then you can go do a service and bury yourself in the desert sands to provide substance to the hungry beetles with your flesh --

Suffice to say, a lot of the guilt in this pleasure seems to come from the fact that Ahk can get a little too emotionally invested if the work is really good. He tries to limit his interactions to commenting and praising certain works, and encouraging content creators. However, he’s also contemplated contributing his own pieces of fiction to the fandom . . .

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #425

“evolution repressed by our backwards contest  /  breeding our torrential demise as we come to this edge”

Serious question, peanut butter or nutella? I think Nutella is a godsend, but I use peanut butter waaaaay more often. We don't even really buy Nutella because I will destroy the jar. Do you prefer baked potatoes or mashed potatoes? Baked. What is your oldest sibling’s middle name? Kathryn. I think. Do you like breadsticks? I just like bread, man. What are your favorite things to spend money on? Tattoos, uuuuugggghhhhh <3 Which would you rather have a new puppy or kitten? Neither, really. Most puppies drive me insane (even though they're cute as everliving fuck), and I don't want another cat. Mom actually talked about getting another, but I really just want my one boy. Roman would get SO jealous, anyway. I enjoy just having my baby. How old will you be on your next birthday? 26. Yikes. Do you ever feel self-conscious when you eat around other people? As "the fat one," I can be sometimes. I would say though that more often than not, it's sort of whatever to me because I'm a human that has to eat. When you opened your eyes this morning, what were your first thoughts? I thought I slept way later than I actually did. What is one thing in the room you’re in that reminds you of somebody? My stuffed meerkat Rebel. Jason got it for me for my first birthday that we were together. Could you ever be friends with somebody who was homophobic? Never again. I was once able to think "agree to disagree," but sometimes by doing so, you're siding with evil by not enforcing what is more than just a belief. It should come with being a human. Also given my own sexuality, it would be a slap in the face to me. Would you ever want to be a supermodel, or date one? Hell no. I'd date one though, if they were modest about their position. Honestly, have you ever made fun of somebody so bad they cried? Wow, no. Honestly, would you rather be complimented on your looks or intelligence? Quite frankly, nowadays, my appearance. I need it. My self-confidence is so far below "shit." Have you ever purchased a pregnancy test, for yourself or otherwise? Nope. You can get one thing, anything, for free right now. What do you pick? Why? Hm. I know I talk about it a lot, but it would still probably be a 40 gallon terrarium for Venus. She needs - and deserves - it. Honestly, have you ever danced naked? NOOOOOOOO. What was the first illegal thing that you did? Did you get caught? Downloaded music. My mom eventually found out, but didn't care much. What is the home page on the computer you’re on? Google. Do you like to write poetry? I do, but I haven't done it in a while. :/ Are your ears pierced? Yes. If so, were they pierced with a piercing gun, or with a sterile needle? Piercing gun. Which, by the way, do not do. There are many more risks with a piercing gun versus a needle by a professional. Do you wear makeup regularly? I never do. Did you eat cereal for breakfast today? No. I've been on a bagel kick lately. When was the last time you tripped over something? Last night, actually. The rug in the living room was slightly turned up, and I tripped in the dark. I didn't actually fall, thankfully. Any obsessive-compulsive tendencies? I'm diagnosed with OCD. I experience more ruminations and intrusive thoughts more than obsessive behaviors, though. Who was the last person you yelled at? Probably Mom. Why did you yell at them? I don't remember. Favorite type of apple? I like pink lady apples. I really enjoy any, so long as they're crisp. Ever seen live horse racing? No. To be totally honest, I don't really like the concept of it. Motivating a horse to run by hurting it doesn't exactly seem moral... How about live greyhound racing? No. What’s one thing, besides the obvious, that you couldn’t live without? The Internet, haha. Have you ever touched a giraffe? No. What does your mom call you? Britt. What stresses you out the most in life? I really don't think I could pick a top one. There are so many. Do you play any PC games? What is your favorite? Yeah. Y'all probably know WoW is my favorite. If you were pregnant, how would you tell the father? Well, that would depend on the circumstances. Did we want a baby? Was it a bad surprise, a happy surprise? I can't answer this with just one idea. What’s the hardest level you can play on Guitar Hero? I used to be able to slam out Expert easily with only very few songs I had to play on Hard, but now it's been YEARS. I've played less than once in a blue moon, and my skill's definitely faded some. It really depends on the song. What ever happened with you and your first boyfriend? He couldn't handle my depression anymore. What’s your favorite country song? "When The Stars Go Blue" by Tim McGraw, probably. What is the worst thing a former boyfriend/girlfriend has done to you? Fail to communicate what he was feeling with me and then make a dashing break for it very, very abruptly after three and a half years. It put me past a state of shock, but trauma with how no less than obsessed I was with him. What were you for Halloween last year? I didn't dress up. :/ I wish I had the money and motivation alike to. Are you feeling guilty for something? I always will. Are you usually quiet or loud? Quiet. How many hours do you spend on the computer a day? Like... uh... all of them, oof. What is the show that you watched when you were little, and you still do? Meerkat Manor. Do your siblings text you? Not really. Do you want a small or big wedding? Small. Have you ever searched for your own house on Google Earth? Not the house I currently live in, but I have before. Who is your ex dating/talking to? I don't know. Ever kissed someone who smokes? No. Does it take a lot for someone to annoy you? Frankly, no. Do you own your own computer? This laptop, anyway. Did you ever have to share a room with one of your siblings? Yes, with my younger sister as a kid and pre-teen. What noises in the room you’re in, do you hear at the moment? I hear the video I'm watching, as well as my fan. Have you ever dated someone with longer hair than yours? Yes. What’s the biggest upcoming event for you? Nothing. Not like that's a surprise. What do you typically order from Wendy’s? Son of the Baconator. @_@ Have you ever been given a lapdance by an actual stripper? No. Those are so awkward to me. What do you love most about yourself? I don't know these days. Have you ever received a hickey from the last person you kissed? No. What are you doing right now? This survey and re-watching John Wolfe play Outlast 2. What’s bothering you right now? I'm immensely nervous about tomorrow. I have my first (and I pray the fuck to God not only) session with my new personal trainer then, and I'm terrified by how my body and my mental fortitude is going to react. Y'all have no fucking idea JUST how out of shape I am, and the muscles in my legs seem basically non-existent by now. I have to do something about my health, though, and I'm determined to make this shit work. More than determined. I know the first day is going to be hard, but I need to do this more than I can explain. What was the last thing you drank? ... What great fucking timing, I have a can of Mountain Dew, lol... That's another thing that needs to change. I've gotta stop the emotional and boredom-eating and chill the fuck out with soda. Be honest, do you like people in general? Quite frankly, no. There are plenty of people I love and think are amazing, of course, but I think I lean towards humanity being too shitty to like "in general." Do you want your tongue pierced? I miss my snake eyes. :/ That was suuuuch a cute piercing. I just had to take it out for the safety of my teeth. I kept accidentally clamping down on one of the balls when eating, and it would cause tiny fractures. Do you change your phone background a lot? No. Have you ever made someone so mad that they broke something? No. Have you ever been strip searched? No. Do you have a funny last name? Does anyone make fun of it? It's not funny-sounding, no, I just think it's too manly for me to enjoy as part of my name. Ever have a drug overdose? What did you OD on exactly? Yes. Oddly enough, I don't remember what I OD'd on now... You'd think I would, given how extreme the situation was. It was some cold medicine. Do you get sick of people who call themselves bipolar all the time? I absolutely do. It's extremely insensitive to people like myself who legitimately suffer - and I do mean "suffer" - from the disorder. Describe your day so far in three words: Dull. Lazy. Anxious. What was the most stressful project you had so far/while in school? Probably my senior project and the presentation I had to do for it. I taught about the fallacies and misconceptions of snakes, and I made a PowerPoint and some drawings to color and crosswords for the special ed children. I was so, so very nervous, but I got through it fine and the kids seemed to enjoy it. I actually still have the recording. Choose one- Butterfinger, Milky Way, Snickers: MILKY WAY. FUCK I love those. Have you ever stepped in dog poop? UGH yes. What was the last thing you spent money on? My niece's birthday present. Have you ever slept in the same bed with the last person you kissed? Yeah. Is there a guy that knows a lot about you? I almost said "yes," but then I realized he doesn't know me at all anymore. I've changed so much, hopefully mostly for the better. He hasn't "known" me in many years. Is there someone you just can’t imagine your life without? It's terrifying to imagine my life without Mom; Sara, too. Do you prefer Starbucks coffee or small cafe coffee? I prefer no coffee. Would you ever consider getting a piercing in your septum? Nah. Do you enjoy being outdoors? If it's cool outside and I have somewhere to sit that's not the ground, yes. Do people tell you that you have an accent? Sometimes. Do you enjoy watching fireworks on the 4th of July? They're pretty, but I don't support their usage by this point in my life. They're a fire hazard, triggering to some vets with PTSD, and beyond terrifying for animals. What’re some unspeakable subjects for you? I get most heated about child molestation. You do not fucking touch a child like that. I don't even write any of my bajillion evil guys committing it in RP because I just can't stomach it. Even when my little sister (a children's social worker) is telling Mom about some stuff she sees at work, I have to not be present, 'cuz that shit isn't rare. It's nauseating. Is there anyone you would take a bullet for? A good number of people, honestly. Do you enjoy tanning? Hell no, I avoid the sun and heat at like all costs. Are you a virgin? This is going to sound weird, but I actually don't know, but I lean towards no. Who’s your celebrity crush? mARK EDWARD FISCHFUCK Did or do you get good grades in English class? I was always excellent in English. What part of your body are you self-conscious about? My stomach. But I'm self-conscious about everything else, too. Are you expected to help fix Thanksgiving dinner? No. Everyone knows I can't cook worth a damn. Have you ever lost anyone close to cancer? Truly close, no. Unless you include pets, actually. Then a few. :/ Do you personally know anyone who is transgender? Yep. When was the last time you got a shot? Earlier this year for Covid. Get your fucking vaccine, btw. :^)

[lovemesomesurveys]

[143running]

What do you waste your time doing the most? I’ve wasted so much time these past few years doing absolutely nothing. :/

Have you ever been backstabbed? If so, what for? Honestly, nothing major comes to mind.

If you could be anything, what would you be? A healthy, functioning, happy person.

If you could be any TV show character, who would you choose to be? Hm, I don’t know.

If you switched genders for one day, what would you do? The same things just as another gender.

What power would you choose to have if you were superhuman? Time travel would be cool.

What stereotype/clique would you say you are more like? Loser, freak, loner, nerd, etc. <<< We can be in a clique together.

How do you handle being under pressure? Not well.

What does your phone cover look like? It’s clear and has Winnie the Pooh sitting inside a big “hunny” jar underneath a beehive that’s hanging off a branch and a few little bees flying around him on it. It’s cute.

Have you ever done anything illegal? If so, what was it? Downloading music and stuff like that. Big rebel.

What is the perfect weather to you? Fall and winter weather.

If you were a stripper, what would your stage name be? I don’t know.

What is your favorite holiday, why? I just love everything about Christmastime.

What is your least favorite bug? Um, I don’t like ANY bug.

What is your favorite thing in the opposite sex? Hmm.

What is your biggest fear? Losing my loved ones, never getting better/getting worse, never doing anything with my life...

What is something your looking forward to? Nothing at the moment.

If you could live on any planet, which one would you choose? Earth works for me.

What is your favorite junk food? Chips and dip, ramen, sweets.

If you could have any animal as a pet, which one would you choose? I like having a doggo. 

What is your favorite time of the day? When I have my first cup of coffee and late at night when I do my nightly routine of scrolling through Tumblr, doing surveys, and listening to ASMR.

What name do you wish you had? I’m fine with my name.

What would your dream home be like? A beach house for sure.

What is your favorite color? Pastels, rose gold, sea foam green, coral, and yellow.

Where is your favorite place to be? In bed, at the beach, Disneyland.

What is your favorite fruit? Bananas. 

What is something you’re embarrassed about? My appearance and who I’ve become these past few years. Just myself in general, really.

What is one thing you’d like to be the best at? I don’t need to be the best, I’d just like to be skilled at something useful at least.

Ever been on Chatroulette? (; Yeah.

What is the song that you know every single word to? There’s several. 

Most painful memory? Losing my grandparents and my dog, Brandie are definitely at the top. 

If you could be anywhere, where would you be? I’m good being in bed right now.

What is your favorite place in the whole wide world? The places I listed before.

A word that to you is impossible to spell? Onomatopoeia is always a hard one to remember. <<< For me too and I don’t know why.

What’s something that you collect? Giraffe stuffed animals and knickknacks.

Listener or Talker? Listener.

Thing you hate the most about the opposite sex? I don’t group or generalize like that. There’s things I don’t like that people of any gender might do. 

Could have anything you wanted right now, what would you have? To feel better.

Scariest movie you’ve ever seen? Hmm.

What is the most awkward moment you’ve been in? My life.

A memory you’ll never forget? Many good memories with my grandparents who have passed away.

One of your quirks? Constantly picking/biting my lips.

What type of phone do you have? An iPhone 12 Pro Max.

Favorite quote or saying? I have several.

Something you wanna do before you die? Live, I guess seems like the acceptable answer. <<<

What is a habit of yours? I check the time a lot. Look around you.. What is the thing you like the most around you? My adorable little Baby Yoda plushie next to me on my bed.

Favorite possession? I love all my stuff.

Favorite shirt? All my graphic tees.

Something you own that means a great deal to you? The things I own are important to me.

What is the name of your best friend? Yolanda.

What is your favorite shoes? My Adidas.

Least favorite singer? Hmm.

Something you love and hate at the same time? I’m blanking.

Are you one of those people who don’t like to admit when their wrong? No, I’m quick to admit I’m wrong and blame myself for everything.

Girls who try to much are annoying.. Aren’t they? Anyone who tries too hard can be annoying.

What color makes you relax? A color doesn’t make me relax.

Are you an awkward type of person? Yep, that’s me.

Is it hard for you to make friends? Yes, but also I don’t really try either.

How would you like to leave this earth? Painlessly.

What do you find stupid but most people like? I’ll never understand why Crocs became trendy and then to make it wore they started making accessories for them and I’m just like wtf??

What is a hobby you have? Doing surveys.

What’s your plans for next weekend? Nothing. Have any big dreams? What are they? No. :/

Restaurant that is horrible. Hm.

Have a fetish for anything? No.

Do you like long or short surveys? I like long surveys.

What age did you stop playing with dolls or action figures? Around 11.

Do you think your more mature then most of yours friends? I don’t have any friends.

Like labels? For some things they’re useful.

Does your school have cliques? --

Do you enjoy running? No.

Something that you are horrible at but wish you were good at. I wish I had some artistic ability.

A sport you think is dumb? I’m not into any sport.

What is your favorite food? Ramen, breakfast burritos, biscuits and gravy with scrambled eggs, boneless wings, chicken tenders, pizza, chicken quesadillas, pasta salads, sandwiches, sweets, chips, spaghetti and meatballs...

Ever think about what it would be like to be someone else? Yes.

Night owl or Early Bird? Both since I’m usually still up early in the morning. Lately, though, I’ll doze off for a little while and wake up early.

What celebrity would you not mind meeting? I certainly wouldn’t mind meeting Alexander Skarsgard. ;)

What’s your favorite TV channel? TV Land, CMT, The Hallmark Channel, MTV.

Have texting? Yeah.

You have 3 wishes. What are they? Good health, financial stability, and... more wishes. ha.

What did you first think about when you woke up? I haven’t gone to bed, yet.

What’s the last thing you thought about before you went to sleep? ^^^

Something you would change about this planet. Can be anything. Make it more clean. <<<

What do you want to be when you grow up? Or what are you? I’m nothing.

Like cartoons? Which one is your favorite? Some of them - I miss Doug, Hey Arnold, Rugrats, As Told By Ginger... <<< Check out Paramount+ if you can! Also, I like those as well. Plus, Winnie the Pooh the animated series and Arthur are two I watched recently and still like I don’t care how old I am. I really wish some streaming service would add Braceface.

Do you watch what you eat? Nope.

Have a favorite number? What is it? 8, because I like the way that it’s shaped. <<< Yeah, it’s been my favorite since I was a kid.

Are you quiet or loud? I’m a quiet person.

Were you an annoying baby? That’s not what I’ve been told.

Worst subject? Math was always my worst subject.

Best subject? English.

What’s your favorite brand of shoe? Adidas. 

What’s your favorite month? Why? October-December. I love the holidays and the weather.

Favorite season? Fall and winter.

Least favorite holiday? Hmm.

Do you try new foods or do you stick with what you know you like? These past few weeks I started eating more than just the same few things I had been eating for the past few years. Not new foods necessarily, though there has been some of that, but revisiting some foods I used to eat and seeing if I can eat them or not now. It’s been a good experience so far. I have to really try and put on weight and get my health and strength back up, so that’s what began this whole thing.

Love pictures or hate them? I love pictures. Not of myself, but other things.

Have you ever thought about going to Fiji? I wouldn’t be opposed.

What’s your favorite movie character? I have many.

Have any nicknames? What are they? Sis is my most common.

Who do you miss? Loved ones who have passed away. <<<

Someone have your heart? Someone of your heart but doesn’t know? Just me.

Have any sports you love? What are they? Nope.

Do you keep to yourself or are you out there? I very much keep to myself.

What’s your outlook on life? Not good. :/

Have any moments that took your breath away? Yeah.

What is the prettiest object/person/landscape/anything that you have seen? I like beach scenes and woodland scenes. Waterfalls are also nice, or mountains/hills. <<< Yesss.

Do you wear your heart on your sleeve? My emotions have definitely taken control over me and I can’t hide them.

What’s your style? Very casual and comfy.

Did you like this survey? Cause I might make more! Sure.

[ommsims]

story process challenge

i was tagged  by @xldkx​​ to do this challenge, created by @herpixels​​​ , like a month? a month and a half? ago and it’s been sitting half finished in my drafts for nearly as long. *sigh* (regardless, i love stuff like this so even if it takes me forever to get to it, i appreciate the tags! 💕). 

i decided to answer all the qs because it took me damn long enough to get to this, so i might as well put some extra elbow grease into it (plus it was fun!). btw it’s all going under a cut b/c it is long. i apologize in advance.

1. My Writing Process - used to be a hot damn mess. literally word docs strewn throughout my pc. However, I recently switched to using Onenote (it’s what i use to organize my d&d campaign notes) and hoo-boy is it so much nicer. this is how it’s set up and it’s honestly night and day. i can have a page with outlines, a page to organize & order screenshots, and a separate page for drafting text, and i can easily toggle though them without having to switch windows? a big thumbs up from me.

When it comes to actual writing- I used to write my drafts in novel format, which i enjoyed but it made “converting” them into tumblr posts time consuming and frustrating. I ended up scrapping most of the text in the process, retaining pretty much only the dialogue. 

Anyway, nowadays I write in more of a screenplay format: dialogue only + key scene information with the occasional note to self. 

I do keep a master “arcs” page with key events and each individual character’s arc from beginning to end and secondary “outline” pages with slightly more detailed outline for each leg of the project. No screencaps b/c spoilers galore! 

My typical work flow process for a scene goes: (1) brainstorm scene ideas, (2) take screenshots, (3) organize screenshots into a rough storyboard, (4) add 1st draft of text, (5) edit photos, (6) edit text, (7) upload to "drafts” here on tumblr, (8) let sit for a bit (9) take a final look at things/proofread and edit as needed. It may sound counterintuitive, but i find it much easier to write dialogue for a set of images rather than attempt to take images based on prewritten text. I feel more comfortable editing and tweaking tone and content in the text this way. Otherwise, I get frustrated when I “can’t” shoot a scene exactly as it appeared in my head.

2. How I build my scenes - A lot of what i do is rooted in gameplay, therefore my sets are usually (a) play-tested and (b) not super pretty. I’ve certainly improved at decorating & building over the years but more often than not I download lots off tumblr and the gallery because I don’t have the patience, aptitude, or time to build all of my own sets. That being said, I frequently gut builds only to build a number of completely unrelated mini sets inside to reduce the number of times i have to replace lots. I also keep a list of “important locations” and where certain characters live / will move to, to help keep this all straight as there aren’t nearly enough lots per neighborhood or even per world in this damn game...

my least favorite part of scene building is actually decorating. lol. Don’t get me wrong, I love clutter. I honestly do. but fuck me if i expect myself to spend hours meticulously decorating a set, spend another 3 hours toggling back and forth b/w BB & live modes adjusting things to get rid of the damn routing errors. (yeah, yeah, i know i could ignore them, they’re not important, especially in those scenarios where i’m using a set for screenshots and nothing else, but idk. it really grinds my gears.) and then have to replace the lot like a week later because there aren’t enough lots in the game. *sigh*

3. CC/Pose Making - i do not consider myself to be a cc creator nor a pose maker but i do dabble occasionally. And to be completely honest i’d much rather spend my time doing other stuff, so it’s not high on my list of priorities atm. plus there are so many talented cc creators in this community; i can usually get by with what’s already out there.

4. Getting in the zone - Honestly, I do a lot of brainstorming for plot & dialogue in the shower. I don’t have any particular playlists to get me “in the writing mood” but I do enjoy listening to music as I work. Either instrumental stuff or simply artists/songs I like. If something just so happens to “fit” a scene I’m working on, one i’ve got planned, or even just gives me vibes for a certain character or group, I add a quick note to the top of said scene’s draft. Most of the time I stick it in the recesses of my brain and add a quick link when I finally get to the point of posting the draft to tumblr. For whatever reason, when I have one of those “oh this song is perfect for X” moments it’s essentially ingrained in my mind for the rest of eternity. 

5. The screenshot folder - this will most likely give some of you out there major anxiety. but i swear it’s an organized chaos. :)

yep. 32.9gb of screenshots & related things... 

So with the raws from a single random scene selected, you can see i take roughly 10 screenshots per image posted. not terrible i guess but i’m working on it. Typically I take screenshots and once I’m done editing a scene I’ll move them from the general folder to a more specific project folder.

6. Captions - I’ll answer this in three parts:

for my townie story. not really. I prefer using the text box. I tend to write (& re-write) the dialogue for each one of these scenes several times over as I add more “scenes” into my drafts. It would be incredibly inefficient, time consuming, and would waste a lot more space on my pc to have to save .psds of each image just so i could edit dialogue when I decide: “oh hey maybe so and so needs to bring up X in this scene” and then change my mind an hour later.

for niko, noor, & co. I’m a text on image type gal here. don’t really know why, but it gives the project a different energy. ironically it makes it feel more laid-back to me. which i guess makes sense, it’s a much more light-hearted “story” than my townie project. which is, imo, very soapy haha.

for legacy stuff. all text goes below the images in the text box. reasoning: it’s gameplay, I don’t brainstorm, outline, or pre-write for this. I play the game, take screenshots, plug ‘em into my drafts and write some commentary / dialogue to go along with it.

7. Editing - i am a creature of habit and have not majorly changed my editing process in probably a year and a half (when I began using reshade and had to adjust my color correcting psd). it’s a super basic system:

drag & drop my “color correction” psd.

run actions in ps. (i made my own “all-in-one” actions to really streamline the process; i have different “actions sets” for my premades’ story and for other things that get posted to tumblr. even if no one else notices it, i like the little details that keep my projects separate and “identifiable”. 

voila. all set to upload.

sometimes i crop images, add “text effects”, or do more in depth editing (i.e. editing a phone screen or adding rain etc.) but overall i try and keep it simple for myself. 

8. Throwback - i posted an image of one of the first (but never posted) scenes I’d written for my townie project up above. but as for how would i redo a scene i’d already posted. well i’m currently re-doing my townie story so i guess i’ll just say you’ll see how it’s redone when i get to part 1! 😉

anyway, no tags because i’m so embarrassingly late to this party but if you hadn’t gotten around to this tag, wanted to do it but didn’t get a tag, or started it and left it to sit and now you’re thinking “oh god that was months ago should i even post this anymore?!?” consider yourself tagged by me and go ahead and post it for all to see!

[bltngames]

SAGE 2020: Fan Games

I’d hoped to have this article out a little bit sooner, but I overestimated how long it would take to write about some of these games. Whoops! Like I said when I outlined the posting “schedule” on the first day, we’re playing it fast and loose, so this is just what you get.

Today is the day I talk about fan games! And even though SAGE has “Sonic” right there in the acronym, it’s always hosted fan games from all types, so today we’ve got Mega Man, Mario, Rayman, and even fan games of fan games, if you can believe it.

Sonic Pinball Panic!

Pinball is one of those things where I’ve always been obsessed with it, but never very good at it. And now, with access to digital pinball collections like Pinball Arcade and Pinball FX, I don’t actually find myself playing as much pinball as I thought I would when I was 14 years old. Still, I find myself fascinated by a good pinball table, and this honestly caught me off guard. This could very easily be an official DLC release for one of those aforementioned pinball collections and I wouldn’t even bat an eyelash (in fact, if you ask me, this is better than Pinball FX, which has always had weird ball physics). This looks, sounds, and functions exactly like a real pinball table should. My complaints are minor: for starters, the table feels kind of easy. I’ve never been a pinball wizard, but I was losing balls left and right here and it still took a good 15 minutes before I finally got a game over. Score accumulation is also pretty slow; most pinball tables will dump millions and millions of points on you, but here, it felt like a struggle just to reach the 379k I finished with. Both contribute to the fact that the table feels a little flat, like it’s missing a spark to really put it over the top. And, third, it would be nice if it had controller support. The keyboard works just fine, here (it’s just pinball, after all) but I find that the triggers on a controller feel really good with pinball flippers, and mapping the plunger to the right stick is great, too. This is a Unity game, so I wouldn’t think it’d be that hard to hook it up to the controller mapper. Still, I came away impressed.

Mega Man: Perfect Blue

There are two things out there that always give me pause: fan-made Doom level packs, and Mega Man fan games. Fan made gaming content generally has problems when it comes to difficulty balancing anyway, but these games have earned a certain reputation for their difficulty, which creates a problem when you have content made by fans, for fans. This insularity means these things are usually way too hard for what I would consider “normal” people (read: casual fans and outsiders). Add on to the fact that I’d even say that there are official Mega Man games with bad difficulty balancing, and you have a recipe for frustration. Sadly, this is how I’d characterize Perfect Blue: though this introductory level isn’t impossibly hard, it’s definitely pushing that edge where it’s not very accommodating to someone who hasn’t played and finished every Classic Mega Man game ever made. It almost immediately throws you into scenarios where you have jumps you can barely reach, insta-kill spikes, and enemies that not only actively dodge your shots, but invincible enemies that launch counter attack homing missiles. And then it starts making you juggle all of this stuff, together, at the same time. None of this is insurmountable as long as you’re paying attention, but as a very casual Mega Man fan, it’s an unfriendly first impression and makes me worried about what the rest of the game is going to be like as the challenge naturally ramps up. For those hardcore Mega Man fans among you, the rest of this is solid, at least. The presentation and controls are excellent, and the new sprites are beautiful. It’s a game I’d love to enjoy when it’s done… but I’m assuming I’ll be left out in the cold. A shame, really, because there’s so much promise here.

Sonic and the Mayhem Master

There’s a lot to like about this game, but there’s a part of me that really wonders if this should even be considered a Sonic fan game. Mayhem Master’s depictions of Sonic and Amy Rose are atypical to put it mildly. Here, Sonic seems to be a bookish nerd of sorts, a sidekick to Amy Rose, who has been turned into a burnt out, cigar-smoking detective. Most of the game plays out as half an adventure game, half an RPG, where you roam around the world talking to NPCs and gather clues while being assaulted by random battles. The battle system is super off-the-wall, too, perhaps taking inspirations from games like Mario & Luigi and Undertale. This means that battles aren’t passive -- you spend most of each fight dodging or nullifying incoming attacks with simplistic action-based commands. It’s weird, and different, and occasionally even a little bit overwhelming. That’s kind of the whole game, really. It’s the sort of thing that really doesn’t feel like a Sonic game at all, but it also doesn’t feel bad. The artwork is very charming, I’m interested in seeing the characters develop, and there’s plenty of worldbuilding and mystery. Would this still be as intriguing if you removed the Sonic connection, even if it’s so threadbare? That’s a hard question to answer. I know that some of my interest in this game is seeing how it spins more familiar Sonic elements into something that’s completely different. Worth checking out, for curiosity’s sake if nothing else.

Sonic and the Dreamcatcher

This is a fairly brilliant little game with two unfortunate quirks. If you didn’t know, the special stages in the original Sonic the Hedgehog were inspired by an arcade game of the era called Cameltry, published by Taito in 1989. Now, Sonic’s special stages were different enough from Cameltry that it wasn’t a case of Sega outright stealing the gameplay, but there’s a clear lineage there, and it only becomes clearer when you compare the special stages in Sonic 4 Episode 1 to Cameltry (spoilers: in that game, they’re nearly identical). Dreamcatcher is also from this lineage, but is infinitely more charming than either Sonic 4 and maybe even Cameltry itself. The idea is that you must collect a specific number of blue spheres in order to reveal the Chaos Emerald, after which you have a limited amount of time to find and collect it. It’s very simple, but the presentation really sells the game’s charm. It’s just a game that looks good and sounds good, with an interesting premise executed very well. Also, you get a dedicated “& Knuckles” button to spawn infinite Knuckles to help you collect blue spheres and bash enemies. Being able to have unlimited numbers of these guys sounds like it would break the game, but once that countdown clock begins, the last thing you need is 20+ echidnas clogging up the route back to the emerald. The first quirk this game suffers from is that there’s only two levels. Parts of this have a very “game jam made in a weekend” vibe to it despite the rock-solid music, sound, and gameplay, and only having two levels contributes to that. Hopefully more are coming in the future. The other quirk? You can’t actually download this game -- it’s embedded in a webpage. I’m sure this is to make it easy to play on any platform with a web browser (phones, PCs, etc.) but I find myself greatly desiring a hard copy of this game that can live on my computer forever.

Sonic Galactic

Now here’s just a good old fashioned Sonic fan game. Though it clearly takes inspiration from Sonic Mania’s aesthetics in some places, it’s clearly doing its own thing, featuring not just the core cast of Sonic, Tails, and Knuckles, but also Fang the Sniper, and even a brand new character named Tunnel the Mole. Unlike a lot of Sonic fan games at SAGE, this appears to be using something besides Clickteam Fusion, Game Maker, or Unity. Here, it’s the “Hatch Game Engine,” whatever that is. Whatever the case may be, the game runs very well and is basically indistinguishable from just playing Sonic Mania. Visuals are sharp, music’s good, the two included boss fights are surprisingly fun to fight -- everything seems to be in order. As a result, there’s not really a lot to say. This is just a good, fun game. Anything else I’d say would come off sounding like nitpicks. For example, there’s no way to set graphics options yet, so the game is stuck in 2x Windowed mode. Fang and Tunnel are cute additions, but I wonder how much utility they have as characters. Unless I missed something, Fang’s pop gun is mainly for a weak double-jump ability, and Tunnel’s ability to dig and ricochet off floors, walls and ceilings is cool, but it doesn’t have quite the universal utility of Tails’ flight or Knuckles climbing and gliding. It’ll be interesting to see how or maybe even if their abilities have a chance to grow into something special. Anyway, like I said, those are nitpicks, so try to give this a shot if you can.

Sonic Robo-Blast!

Remasters seem to be a bit of a theme this SAGE, between Sonic Triple Trouble 16-bit, Sonic 2 SMS, Sonic 1 Revisited, but this is perhaps the most surprising of them all: a loving remaster of the original Sonic Robo-Blast. SRB1 was perhaps one of the first true “landmark” fan games, given that it was basically a whole entire game that people could play. It's not a stretch to say that SRB1 probably helped kickstart the fan gaming community that still survives to this day -- I certainly owe my involvement in the community to seeing SRB1 for the first time. The problem is, as historically significant as the game might be, it’s nearly impossible to go back to nowadays -- it’s much, much too dated to be any fun. This remaster completely re-envisions SRB1 as a regular Sonic game, while also pulling in gameplay elements from Sonic Robo-Blast 2. It’s a bit of a time paradox mindwarp, but it helps give it a bit more personality than just making a bog-standard 2D Sonic. It works, aided by the fact the sprites, music and overall presentation are fantastic. The only downside is the Act 2 boss, which commits the cardinal sin of taking away player agency and making you wait around far too much. Here’s hoping this gets finished, because it’s definitely on my radar now.

Super Mario Flashback

This has been floating around for a few years now and I’m glad to see it’s finally starting to get some more substantial content as it moves towards becoming an actual game. That being said, this is also one of those games that’s kind of hard to talk about because it’s just… really polished. The art is incredible, it controls exactly like a Mario game, and there’s already a decent mixture of ideas at play in the demo. Anything else I’d say would sound like nitpicking -- like, for example, the backseat game designer in me wonders if maybe the game is prioritizing aesthetics a little too much. This is a wonderfully animated game, absolutely gorgeous, but some actions, like the butt-stomp and the wall kick, feel a bit sluggish, and I think it’s because they show off fancy animations. Even if it’s a split second, waiting for Mario to attach to a wall to kick off of it feels slow. Really, though, that’s an insignificant complaint. This demo is still well worth checking out.

Sonic Advance 4 Advanced

This game seems like a greatest-hits of Dimps best ideas, spanning the first Sonic Advance all the way to Sonic Rush. There’s just one problem: the game seems broken. Now, my desktop PC is starting to show its age. I built it four and a half years ago, and though it can handle game like Gears of War 5 on high settings at 60fps, slowly, newer games seem to be leaving it behind. That being said, I don’t think a game like Sonic Advance 4 here should be running at what appears to be half its intended speed. It also originally launched in a teeny-tiny window (we’re talking, like, smaller than a postage stamp) and even though the options menu has a toggle for full screen mode, it doesn’t want to work. Something about this game under the hood seems to be struggling very, very, VERY hard. It’s a shame, because if this actually played at the proper speed, it seems like it might actually be an alright game, if a bit complex and busy.

Sonic 2 SMS Remake

Here’s a game I was all buckled in expecting to enjoy. Like it says on the tin, this is a remake of Sonic 2 for the Master System (and Game Gear), but with wide screen visuals and huge expansions to the mechanics, roster of playable characters, and levels. On the outside it seems really impressive, and to a certain degree it is, but something about the controls feel a little off. Sonic’s heavier here than he is on the Master System, perhaps to simulate “real” Sonic physics a little more accurately, but you can also pretty much stop on a dime, and the combination of the two feels awkward. The camera also needs a lot of work, as it’s basic at best and does a poor job of letting you see what’s below (to the dev if you’re reading this: there’s actually video tutorials out there on how 2D scrolling cameras work, it might be worth looking a couple of them up). It also leans into some of the tech limitations of the Master System, like how you aren’t given any rings for boss fights (and even hiding the HUD, a move done to save on resources for the large enemy sprites). I could be picky on a bunch of other little stuff, too, like how the flight mechanics feel, but there are other games to play at SAGE and I’ve got at least two more articles to write. Needless to say, this is a solid (impressive, even) foundation but it’s missing a lot of late-stage polish to clean up the tiny little rough edges.

Rayman Redemption

I tell this story every so often, but it was about three quarters of the way through Rayman 2 on the Sega Dreamcast when it struck me, suddenly: I love this game. I was being chased by a pirate ship through some rickety bridges and even though I was dying over and over and over again, I realized I had been enjoying Rayman 2 enough that I might put it in my top ten Dreamcast games. But that was 2002, and the years haven’t been so kind to ol’ Rayman. From the strangely celebrity-infused Rayman 3, to the tragedy of Rayman 4 (eventually becoming Raving Rabbids) to the endless, careless ports of Rayman 2 to every platform under the sun, one gets the impression Ubisoft maybe didn’t know what to do with Rayman. Especially now, when most of Ubisoft’s games are some form of online live service or cookie cutter open world experience (or increasingly both). But the fans know what they want. Rayman Redemption takes the original 1995 Rayman game and lovingly gives it a fresh coat of paint. The results are akin to what Taxman and Stealth did for Sonic CD in 2011, with wide screen visuals, improved controls, touched up level design, but gameplay that still feels faithful and accurate to the original experience. Except that Sega charged money for that, and here, fans have released this for free. Ubisoft’s loss, I guess. I didn’t play Rayman 1 until well after I’d finished Rayman 2, and I’ll admit, I kind of bounced off of it back then. It felt slow, and awkward, and when the difficulty ramped up, it got very hard, very quickly. Now, admittedly, I’ve only put about 30 minutes into Redemption here, but just the addition of a run button is incredibly welcome, and the retooled level design and powerup mechanics helps the game feel way less obtuse overall. It’s just a cleaner, tighter, more accessible and more polished version of Rayman.

Stay tuned for the next article: Indie games.

[campfireescapist]

Escapism in video games I play

Animal Crossing: When people think about video games and Escapism, Animal Crossing is probably the first thing to cross your mind. The same obviously goes for me, which is why it’s at the very top of the list, even when these aren’t really in a specific order. The first time I played Animal Crossing I was in first grade playing on the gamecube. My avatar I named after a friend and had accidently made it a boy, but I loved it regardless. When I was little there wasn’t a time I wasn’t playing the game or talking to the villagers. It was something that seemed natural, at times I still remember laying on my cousins large bed (she lived with us at the time) and playing while the sun illuminated the screen through the blinds. I can only look back on those times fondly, and honestly miss the carefreeness of my childhood where as I grew and my insomnia grew worse I could play until well past three in the morning. Tom Nook kept me busy, Rolf even with his gruffness never failed to make me smile, and K.K’s songs where something I watched with a floaty an oddly melancholy feeling, likely because I knew eventually the song would end and I’d have to wait another week to see that white dog again. In the real world I still scoff at the thought of community because it always seemed like everyone at school or just people in general promised their affection and support but were incredibly quick to contradict that promise, it always felt like the saying, guilty before proven innocent, and when playing Animal Crossing I didn’t feel that. Sure at times the villagers were grumpy but I never took it to heart. My gameplay always seemed to be few and far inbetween, but there was never a moment I didn’t feel absolutely despair when the villagers cried about how long I’ve been gone. It only made sense because it's hard for me to recall pure moments of happiness in my life but can recall many many times I’ve smiled widely hearing the nonsense gibberish of the villagers and asking them how their day went. Lately I’ve engrossed myself in trying to complete the fossils in the museum, a slightly tedious task but it was a task nonetheless that I know I needed with my real life constantly pummeling with a lack of purpose. The collecting, fishing, catching, and payments were all little accomplishments in themselves and they continue to be, and I hear often it’s those things that bring those with depression to the game because taking care of their village is something they actually want to do. It’s an effort in its own right and a commitment that doesn’t feel like a chore. Commitment is often a struggle on my behalf, and at times as I grew older when my life was hectic and I tried to play, that feeling of tediousness did nag me but I’ve heard before with Animal Crossing, the experience is highly affected by your mood. With the new Animal Crossing coming out, I know I’ll be playing on days when the world is too much or when my mind needs to fixate on something. The game has always been exceptionally good at being something you can play not just with your full attention, but also when you simply need something to zone out to. It’s made easy with the soft tones and minute details that make your town not just a place but a home. A home that you recount in your dreams, a home that makes you feel homesick when you’re not playing. Animal Crossing gives you an experience, an experience they were actually first to give in all of gaming. They let you build a life, a better life then you have, or just a life you wished you could live without overwhelming responsibility and harmful people. It gives you a second chance when no one else does making it the perfect and ideal game to escape to.

Minecraft: To be able to escape I believe, at least from my own experience, one must have a strong or vivid imagination. A game about building is and was something of a creative release. I play minecraft more than any other game I think I’ve ever played, not only because I could be mindless but I could begin a narrative in my head, acting it out with my character. Something I need to do often as my head always seems to need a constant stream of something, and building a life and home where I’d need not only to gather materials but fight monsters. It becomes an expected but still surprising world, where there's really no end. You can walk a thousand miles and still be finding new shapes and structures that leave you with a sense of wonderment. It’s a game that offers two different ways of playing making it ideal for whatever mood you’re in, peaceful or hardcore. There’s never a bad time to play, and there’s never a way you’re doing it wrong. The main reason minecraft calls to me though, is it’s multiplayer option and the mods. I started playing Minecraft because I first saw many people on youtube playing and I wanted those experiences for myself. I’d ended up downloading that multiplayer for minecraft app and played with so many people, one person who I’m still in contact (even when we shouldn’t but that’s a different story) but the memories where always fond. Nowadays I still play survival mode with my friend back home. I’ve just moved away and my best friend is now states away and we’ve been using Minecraft as a way to bond, and I’m grateful we did because even if I’m just looking at her avatar it still feels like we’re together. When it comes to mods, we both value the new experience and immerse ourselves further into the world we get to make together. The same feeling is also accomplished on single player. But regardless of mods or how many people are playing, Minecraft is an immersive fulfilling experience that only gets dry when you run out of creativity, or used just a little too much for the time being. It’s a game for everyone that is hard not to come back too.

Animal Jam: This is an online game I discovered on a lonely summer, with Club Penguin there was a hole of online games for people to talk with and do missions gone. Animal Jam made up for that with features and experiences that Club Penguin itself lacked. You can be a number of animals with customizable patterns, it also has a lot to offer even without a membership. You can make art and hang it in your home, add friends and talk freely. (It’s still a kids website, but currently they have a new game called Feral coming out for older audiences so you can have more adult conversations on there.) Seasonal tasks appear and role playing with other members is a common occurrence. If you want a free roam game where you can be yourself in a friendly world, that’s sponsored by Animal Planet. A special thing about this website/game though, what also makes it an easy escape is the learning features. There’s videos and facts about animals everywhere, even a live camera in the ocean you can watch! Maybe it’s just me but watching cute little geckos and fish swim are a pretty good distraction while filling your brain!

Pokemon: Pokemon is a game about bonding and trusting the bonds you make along your journey. Unlike the games I’ve listed before, Pokemon is not only a free roaming game but also Story oriented. It’s a clear path to follow that’s enthralling, everytime I play I normally beat the game in exactly twenty four hours. The characters are so finely written that you grow attached easily, as if they were real, they become your friends the same way your pokemon do. On the top of my head I can say my teams from each game I’ve played. You grow and bond, you get concerned when your pokemon takes a hit. It’s a world you wish was real with it’s magical creatures making life easier. In the real world we have pets, but in Pokemon you have a creature who will fight for you, play with you, they look to you and promise you they will hold on, will hold back tears to make you happy. I think getting to love something that grows to love you back pulls at your heart strings and makes the experience more personal than you expect. Even when the stories are over, there’s something extra, always something to do, and it’s hard to put down. It’s a journey that never ends in a world so well thought out, you know it’s home by the end of the game.

Poptropica: Another story oriented game that strays from others by being purely straight forward. You have to follow along, you have to figure out what comes next to further the story along or no progress will be made. I’ve heard and experienced, some people take longer, or have a little trouble getting into a mindset that they can flow too. Poptropica very quickly sets the tone by starting the story and urging you along, urging you to explore to find the next step, and if not the game lets you stew by basically pausing all action. The islands vary in difficulties, meaning you can choose something easy or hard depending on how long you want to be at what you’re doing, and there's multiple islands, meaning multiple stories you can find yourself living. You’ve probably played this game before and hold it in fond memories. Coming back to it may also be a welcome blast to the past, that can lead you down to hopefully good memories you can lose yourself too.

ABZU: One of the most colorful and beautiful games to ever exist. This game is story oriented and still a free roaming game, with a unique twist. Besides the stunning music, the games otherwise silent, wordless. There’s a concoction of colors and animals to swim with that paint an underwater world that puts the outerworld to shame. It’s serene and peaceful, constantly leaving you with a sense of curiosity and suspense for what’s to come next. Describing how much of an outlet this game is, is actually quite baffling, you can just as easily watch the game and feel positively blessed, but there’s no better feeling than maneuvering your character through the water and perching on a rock to meditate while flipping through the types of fish surrounding you. The visuals absolutely bewitch you, stealing your attention making it hard to look away.

Games are an amazing escape, and I’m sorry if this list is a little redundant but that’s a given. I’ll add more to the list another time, but feel free to let me know what games you escape to and why!

Also, this is just my own personal experience so it may differ from others, but if it helps or if you agree I’d be happy to talk about it.

[shutupkimjongdae]

[TRANS/MAGAZINE] star1 June 2019 Issue Interview with Chen (14Q) To view/download (JPG), click here Headliner: June, and Chen Our radio star who soothes the exhausted minds Chen’s voice is filled with warm comfort

source: x translator: jen please do not repost!

To read as text only, keep reading!

Chen, who blossomed after 7 years

Member of EXO, EXO-CBX, lyricist, and strong (t/n: as in doing well on music charts) OST singer. Chen has several great titles, but he never half-heartedly does anything. Chen, who gained a syndrome-like (t/n: unprecedented) popularity as soon as he debuted due to his intense performance that made girls’ hearts flutter, matured as a solo artist capable of consoling the public’s hearts with only his relaxing ballads after constant quenching (t/n: metaphor for hard work). We met Chen, who bloomed his own gorgeous flower with his first album ‘April, and a flower’ after 7 years since debut. April of (this) spring was a busy month for you. I had an EXO-CBX special edition concert left to do, so as soon as I was finished with my first solo album promotions, I left for Japan and prepared for the concert. This April, I was very productive, from solo activities to subunit performances. After coming back to Korea, I had a full day of rest, had dinner with all the members, and had a fun time. It took 7 years for your solo debut. What kind of mentality did you have when first preparing for the album? I was able to release my solo album way sooner than I had expected. Because I knew my weaknesses better than anyone else, I wanted to work on those weaknesses and show a more matured, perfect appearance. However, at some point, I realized that there’s (just) no end to improving my flaws. I thought that I shouldn’t put it off any longer and decided to seriously prepare for it and experience it first-hand. I told the company thinking that if I felt like I was lacking something, I’d just learn, practice, and improve in that area as I go. On the outside, you don’t seem to have any flaws. The first thing I realized I was lacking was the ability to sing a full song that’s almost 4 minutes long by myself. When in a group, you only get to sing a part of a song, but because I was alone, I struggled to just keep the flow going. It was hard for me to decide (the answer to) “What kind of music do I want to do?”. I’ve been asking myself that question for a long time since there is so much breadth to music. I think it took me a while to figure out what I wanted among (those wide range of options). It’s also unique that your album only consists of ballad songs. We expected there to be fast-paced tracks since you are also good with dance songs, as an EXO member. It was an answer to the question ‘What kind of music do I want to do?’. What I really want to do with music, rather than just singing the song that’s given to me, is convey the message and the emotions through that song. And I thought that ballad would be a good genre to do so. It was my intention to put only ballad tracks on the album, but there’s something that wasn’t done on purpose. I didn’t know that all the songs would be about breakups. I collected the songs while thinking that I wanted to convey the feeling of consolation, and it just happened. I think I’ll look for more love songs to put on my next album (laughs). Since you’ve had great accomplishments as an EXO member, when you announced your solo debut, people were very interested and had high expectations. Did you feel any pressure or responsibility from that? Of course. Since I was going to be the first EXO member to release a solo album in Korea, I felt pressured and a sense of responsibility. I thought hard about how to create an album that would meet everyone’s expectations. While I was preparing for the album, I spent so much time thinking about it, and my attitude slowly changed. Even though I feel thankful that people have high expectations about me, rather than trying to change to meet those expectations, I thought that it would be better to just show my true self. I wanted to show a fresh and true image, different from the old one I’ve built up thus far. You also wrote the lyrics for the track ‘Flower’. It feels like you are a very emotionally sensitive person. The key word for this album was comfort, and I think there are different types of comfort. For example, comforting someone who just went through a breakup or comforting a friend. I wanted to bring those different types of comfort into one. I was wondering what would be their common ground and came to a conclusion—time. With time, any pain or thought bugging you shall fade. I wrote about the seasons as a metaphor for time. I think it’s impossible to always be happy and to only experience good things in life. I wanted to say let’s have faith because even though at some point, the flowers will fall off and everything will pass, whenever a new season comes, you’ll find new hope and the flowers will start to bloom one by one. I think the making of an album is similar to a flower blooming. Do you think your flower bloomed beautifully? I think the flower turned out to be more beautiful than I had imagined. Whenever I am introducing my album, I get all the spotlight from saying that I participated in writing lyrics, but all I did was just write lyrics and sing. This album release was possible because everyone, company employees, the director, and staff, worked together. When preparing for this album, I was able to experience first-hand some of the things I didn’t really know about. So I think this album came out to be more meaningful and cool. How was working with Paul Kim, the composer of ‘Sorry not sorry’? I am a huge fan of Paul Kim. I made a request through the company, and he gladly agreed to help. I was worried at first about whether I would be able to sing his song well since he’s famous for writing emotional songs. So I practiced even harder, and ultimately Paul Kim also really liked the result. It was such a relief. I was able to form a nice relationship (with him) from working on this song (together). I would like to work with him on another good song next time. You ranked first on the Korean music charts and on the iTunes charts in 33 different countries with your first solo album. I was so surprised because I didn’t expect that at all. I felt really pressured in the early stages of album preparation, but after I changed my mindset and put down the burden to focus only on showing my true image, I didn’t feel pressured to do well on the charts or have high expectations. I think I’m starting to feel pressured now that I have received such good results. I’m happy to have that burden and to have these worries. I’ve started to worry about (the question) “How else can I show my true self?”. After this album, you received the title of ‘Trust and Listen to Chen’. Is there any reaction (t/n: literally, evaluation) that left an impression? I’m embarrassed, and it feels strange to be called by any nickname. I don’t search up reviews or comments either. I don’t want to become arrogant or change, so I don’t go looking for reactions online. I want to improve by just silently trying my best to to do things that I want to do. I think your charming points are your clean vocals, strong high notes, and stable voice while singing live. In your opinion, what are the strengths your voice has? While preparing for this album, “What exactly are my strengths?”, “Is it that I have a higher vocal range than others?”—I thought about (these questions). I honestly have never felt satisfied with my voice. Even when I try my best, when I listen back to the recordings, a lot of them still make me I think, “Why did I sing like that?” I don’t have anything I can call my strengths at this moment. However, I do have a goal for the future: I want to be someone who can convey sincere emotions without being too decorative (t/n: being excessive/overdoing it). What motivates you to continuously show colorful charms of yourself, as a member of EXO, EXO-CBX, and soloist Chen? I think having alone time is important. Like my nickname ‘homebody’, I recharge by taking some time for myself. I am in a position where I need to give people energy, and since I’m always meeting with people in my everyday life, I rest like a phone recharging in a quiet, relaxed environment. When I make a mistake on stage and feel stressed, or even when something bad happens, I try to ease my mind on my own and I’m able to overcome it. Only then can I work on my next task without anything holding me back. This year it will have been 7 years since EXO debuted. What does EXO mean to Chen? It really feels like family. When you’re working as a team with different members, some members are going through an enthusiastic phase, and others are going through a phase where they feel like taking a break... For being understanding, considerate, and willing to guide each other despite our differences, I want to say thank you to the members who have been running together (with me) up until now. They’re so dear to me like actual brothers. Leader Suho said, “We are so happy whenever the fans say ‘thank you for being EXO’. I want to be an EXO member in my next life”. Do you feel the same way? If I could be an EXO member in my next life, that would be really great. One of the happiest things I was able to experience as an EXO member is being able to meet so many good people. Our members, managers, staff, and of course, our fans. Being in EXO, I’ve only met good people. It always feels so nice to hear the fans’ message of ‘thank you for singing’. The fact that there are people who like my singing means that you have their approval. More than anything, that’s what really motivates me to keep going.

[eldritchsurveys]

671.

Do you use wide ruled or college ruled notebooks? >> I always preferred college-ruled, like it was a hard rule for me when I was young. I refused to use wide-ruled paper. It was anathema. I still don’t care for it, but I don’t use paper much anymore, period, so it doesn’t matter.

On a pair of jeans, which pocket do you most use? >> The back right one, I guess, because I usually have my phone in there so I go in and out of it a lot.

Do you have a class ring? >> No.

What about a letterman jacket? >> No.

Do you still have a piggy bank? >> I don’t recall ever having one, tbh.

Is it actually shaped like a pig? >> ---

What is the name of the hospital you were born in? >> It was called Elizabeth General Medical Center when I was born, but now it’s been folded into a citywide system of hospitals all using the name “Trinitas”.

What is the legal drinking age of the country you live in? >> 21.

What type of internet browser are you using? >> Firefox.

What's your favorite search engine? >> Unfortunately, it’s Google. All the shit I hate about Google is the same exact shit that makes it so good as a search engine.

Are you a "Master Googler"? >> I don’t really know what that means. Honestly, it doesn’t take much cleverness to get what you want out of Google -- other search engines, on the other hand...

Do people often buy you photo albums when they don't know what else to buy? >> No. No one even uses photo albums these days.

Have you ever literally lent someone a shoulder to cry on? >> No.

How long do your showers typically last? >> Between five and ten minutes, usually skewing to the shorter end. I really just don’t like being in there, so I got real efficient at it.

What is the most annoying accent you've ever heard? >> ---

Have you ever seen a mariachi music video? >> No.

Have you ever watched a movie with the commentary? What about the subtitles? >> I’ve never watched a movie with the commentary on, but one day I might like to try that with a movie I’m already well familiar with, just to see if it’s interesting. I always watch things with the subtitles on, if I can help it.

What are your thoughts on re-constructive surgery? What about plastic surgery? >> I mean... they’re good things for people who want/need them? I don’t know what kind of opinion I’m supposed to have.

Or should people learn to love their flaws? >> Oh, that’s what you mean. No, I don’t think “people should learn to love their flaws” is an appropriate attitude for me to take. Especially since it’s not like I’m a paragon at unconditional self-acceptance or anything.

Do you style your hair regularly? >> I don’t style my hair at all.

What does your laundry basket/hamper look like? >> It’s round and purple.

Do you have a favorite word? What is it? >> There are words I like more than others, but I don’t think I have a favourite one or anything.

McDonald's sweet tea: Yes or No? >> No.

When was the last time you had a papercut? >> I don’t remember. I almost gave myself one earlier today, putting some papers into my tote bag.

What was the worst Halloween costume you ever had? >> ---

Is violence ever really the answer? >> Sure.

Do you have a favorite brand of pen? >> I don’t think so.

Do you enjoy the smell of sharpies? What about gasoline? Or even chlorine? >> I enjoy the smell of the first two, in moderation. Not chlorine, though.

Have you ever sung in a choir? If so, what section were you in? Bass, Tenor, Alto, Soprano? >> I was a soprano as a child, shifted into alto as a preteen, and I think now I’d be most comfortable as a tenor.

Did you ever pronounce bologna how it's spelled? >> Yeah, to be silly.

Are either of your parents in the medical field? >> No.

What about educational field? >> No.

Can you cry on cue? Do you wish you could? >> No, I can’t, and I don’t really care to.

Do you prefer gold or silver jewelry? >> Gold.

Have you ever shaved your arms? What about your stomach? >> No to arms, yes to stomach.

Facebook or Myspace? Which is your favorite? Or is there another one? >> I mean, only facebook is even relevant now. I don’t like it, though. I prefer to socialise here or on Discord.

Have you ever made a friendship bracelet? >> I don’t think so.

Have you ever been sledding on a real wooden sled with metal runners? >> No. I’ve never been sledding, period.

Are you allergic to any particular animals? What about foods? And medicines? Or are you one of the lucky ones who don't have any allergies? >> I am one of the lucky ones, yeah.

Did you or anyone you knew get swine flu? >> No.

Do you think that people caused global warming? Or is it more of a natural earth cycle thing? >> I think it’s a little of column B and a lot of column A.

Do you watch Curling during the Olympics? >> I don’t watch the Olympics.

Is bright red lipstick classy or trashy? >> It’s just lipstick.

Do the potential lovers you pursue typically have tattoos and piercings? >> ---

Do you like your teeth? Have you had any work done on them? >> I mean, they’re fine. They serve their purpose. No, I haven’t had work done on them.

Do you know what a lobotomy is? >> Sure.

Have you ever put ranch dressing on pizza? >> No.

Do you remember the purple and green colored ketchup from the 1990s? >> Ha, I do.

Have you ever taken a dance class? >> When I was a child. I wouldn’t mind taking one now, but I can’t afford stuff like that.

Do you ever actually buy CDs anymore or do you just download music? >> I just use Spotify. I’ve chosen the path of least resistance.

Who is prettier? Jennifer Love Hewitt or Megan Fox? What about Ellen Degeneres or Mariah Carrey? >> None of these people even cross my radar when it comes to aesthetically pleasing faces.

Have you ever been to failblog.org? >> No.

Do you own a guitar? >> No.

Do you pop your knuckles? >> Sometimes.

Do all of your photos in yearbooks usually turn out looking terrible? >> All of them did until senior year, weirdly enough.

Did you have uniforms at your high school? >> No.

How often do you dust your room? >> I don’t. I probably should, but it just never occurs to me.

Do you ever use Febreez? >> No.

Have you ever been to Japan? What about Germany? Or Mexico? >> No.

Does your family ever take fun vacations? >> ---

Where was the last place you went on vacation? >> New Orleans.

Have you ever seen a castle in real life? If you said no, please note that the castles at Disney parks count. =D >> There’s an apartment complex near me called the Grand Castle and it’s just the most plastic-toy-castle looking thing I’ve ever seen. Hold on, here’s what it looks like...

It looks fake, or like one of those photos that plays with perspective and scale, where it’s actually a Lego castle or something. But nope, it’s an apartment complex. smh. Anyway, no, I’ve never seen a legitimate castle in real life.

Do you remember the first book you read by yourself? >> No.

Did you ever read R. L. Stine's Goosebumps books? >> Yep, I read a lot of those as a kid.

What about Lemony Snicket's "A Series of Unfortunate Events" books? >> I didn’t even hear of those until I was grown.

Have you ever seen a nun in public? >> Sure. One time back in the day, Sigma and I ran into a couple of nuns on Eighth Avenue and Sigma talked to them for a solid hour. They were... very accommodating.

Have you ever heard of a musician named Priscilla Renea? >> No.

Have you seen the Austin Power's movies? >> I think I saw the first one. This was a long time ago, though. I couldn’t sit through five minutes of one now.

Do you, or did you ever, have a Gameboy? >> No, I’ve never had one.

Are you sitting in a rolley chair? >> Nope.

Were you a Nancy Drew reader when you were younger? >> I wasn’t.

Do you think Twilight is losing lots of original fans because of the movie? >> It didn’t appear that way to me, but I also wasn’t in the fandom so I wouldn’t really know for sure.

Do you think Zombieland was like an American version of Shaun of the Dead? >> I mean, in the sense that it is a comedy film about zombies, sure, why not. But really, they’re just in the same subgenre of movie, is all. They’re their own things.

Have you ever ice skated? What about roller skated? >> I’ve done the latter but never the former.

Do you have a video camera? What about a digital camera? Webcam? >> There’s a camera on my phone, and there’s one in both my computers but I never use those.

What is your preferred instant messaging service? >> Discord.

Do you enjoy being in photos? Or do you prefer taking the photos? >> I prefer taking them.

Know anyone named Gus? >> Sparrow’s former cat was named Gus.

Do you know anyone who seems to break EVERYTHING they touch? >> Nope.

Are giraffe's weird animals? >> They are and I dig it.

[merryfortune]

Fizzy Feelings

Fandom: Uma Musume Pretty Derby

Ship: Gold City/Yukino Bijin

Warnings: A bath bomb is eaten & characterization is based on the mini-comics but otherwise, it’s all fluff!

Word Count: 2.3k

Synopsis:  Gold City takes Yukino Bijin on a grown-up city girl date and on that date, Gold City specifically takes Yukino Bijin to Lush.

  Gold City’s heart was still hammering, and they were approximately already forty-five minutes into their date. That is if you added up all the minutes and seconds between here and leaving the dorm and that had taken quite some time due to Gold City’s regular morning hypotension. Regardless, they got there in the end and were able to leave together. They had taken the train to the inner part of the city; where the CBD was and where a shopping mall was. And that had been the most nerve-wracking experience of her life because as much as she loved and crushed on Yukino Bijin, the girl was bit of a ditz.

  No. She was a lot of a ditz. But it was endearing and cute and gave Gold City a good excuse to hold her hand. After all, the country bumpkin couldn’t get lost if they were connected so tightly with interlocking fingers. But, of course, being exactly who she was, Yukino Bijin didn’t entirely get that Gold City was holding her hand as a romantic gesture. In fact, Gold City was beginning to wonder if this date was one-sided and that thought terrified her.

  So, for now, she played it cool. And that was relatively easy for Gold City because she was most at peace when she could be in a crowd and as they got closer to their destination, the more people clustered them on the city streets; not even glancing past them at all despite the fact they were two Horse Girls quite far from the school at this point.

  Yukino Bijin hummed a little tune under her breath as she held onto the strap of her purse and onto Gold City’s hand. She moved to the beat of her own drum, all of the time but it was nice for Gold City to have some clue as to what that tune was and, admittedly, it wasn’t all that great. It was a quirky little tune which showed that Yukino Bijin had no aptitude at all for music, but Gold City adored it nonetheless as they entered the underground complex.

  “Where do you want to go first?” Gold City asked, breaking Yukino Bijin’s tune.

  She blinked and mused thoroughly on the question. Her eyes glazing over as she weighed the pros and cons.

  “I’m right for racing shoes, at the moment.” she said at long last.

  Gold City laughed. “This isn’t a racing store; we’ll be lucky to find skirts or shorts with tail holes.” she replied and without thinking, she gave two flicks of her sandy-coloured tail.

  “Oh dear,” Yukino Bijin said, “I was hoping to buy a new casual skirt… The city has so many more options. Back home I had to sew m’own. I know! Is there a sewing shop, we can go to? And what else? I want the bon-a-fide city slicker experience, Goldie.”

  Gold City smiled. She hated it when anyone called her “Goldie” or “Goldielocks” and yet, somehow, she didn’t mind it when Yukino Bijin called her it. So, she smiled softly down on her companion.

  “Well, I suppose we could visit a few luxury shops then.” She said.

  “Ooh, for make-up and stuff?” Yukino Bijin asked.

  “Exactly!” chirruped Gold City. “I know, why don’t we visit Lush?”

  “Lush?” Yukino Bijin blinked owlishly and her face lit up with joy. “That’s the fancy sweets shop, ain’t it?!”

  “Er, no… This is an, um, bath and body lotion and hair care product shop.” Gold City explained; she was surprised that Yukino Bijin hadn’t heard of it – or had maybe gotten her wires crossed at all.

  “That sounds lovely. You have such pretty hair, Gold City. I would like my hair t’ be so silky too…” Yukino Bijin said.

  “I will very happily buy you anything you want there, hon.” Gold City quickly told Yukino Bijin because she had Gold City wrapped around her little pinkie finger – and she didn’t even know it!

  Yukino Bijin’s simple but adorable face lit up with joy. “Really?!” she exclaimed.

 “Really.” Gold City confirmed.

  “Then let’s rock’n’roll, Goldie! Let’s go shopping!” she whooped and hollered.

  Gold City smiled and soon enough, Yukino Bijin was marching them both right through the shopping centre. They got lost a few times here and there but that was okay. It gave them time to peruse the other shops on the way to Lush. They weren’t able to find any shops with pants or skirts or dresses which accommodated their needs, but they were still able to try on the occasional shirt here and there. As well as other accessories such as scarves and purses. They also wandered through the insides of a technology shop for the latest music and movies. Though Gold City had already illegally downloaded the bulk of such trendy things and Yukino Bijin had more vintage and obscure tastes. Even learning that Yukino Bijin had an affinity for ancient, country music wasn’t enough to cause Gold City to rethink her crush on her.

  Nonetheless, they were able to get where they were going, but they did stop for macarons and drinks first. An iced coffee for Gold City and an apple juice for Yukino Bijin. After that little pit-stop, the two Horse Girls continued on their way and eventually made it to their end goal destination and when they arrived, it was like Yukino Bijin’s eyes had been opened to the promised land. They utterly sparkled as she looked around the rather narrow and skinny little place that Lush resided in. Gold City didn’t quite understand the appeal but maybe it was because she was used to these sorts of things.

  Regardless, they milled around the insides of the shop with a few other customers and the staff as well. The store smelt very strongly of all its different, all-natural products. It gave Gold City something of a headache but Yukino Bijin embraced it as she admired all the little knickknacks available on the shelf. Gold City followed after her, explaining the uses of all these different things.

  Eventually, Yukino Bijin decided on some sort of leave-in shampoo and a body scrub but then, they got to the final frontier that Lush was known for and Gold City won’t lie, she had her reservations about it due to the type of idiotic girl Yukino Bijin was. She was very quickly infatuated with the baskets of bath bombs available. Her eyes widened over them as she inspected the different, crumbly spheres and she licked her lips.

  “I was right,” she said, “they do sell lollies here.”

  “N-No, they don’t,” Gold City said, “honey, these are bath bombs.”

  But it was too late. Yukino Bijin was far too in her own head to want to listen to anyone else and with great gusto, she took a bite out of the bath bomb. She hummed as she ate it like one would eat an apple. White powder dusted her lips as she mused over the taste.

  “Mm, crunchy!” she said, enthusiastically. “I like it.”

  “Th-Those are bath bombs, sweetheart.” Gold City stuttered.

  And it was in that moment, so awkward and embarrassing, that Gold City was truly able to confirm how far her feelings for Yukino Bijin ran. If her liking of dorky music couldn’t kill off the infatuation, then neither could her ability to eat bath bombs apparently because Gold City was swept head over heels for just how unique a girl Yukino Bijin was. She was so stupid and so cute all at once. Gold City’s heart thumped in her chest as she wished, quite dearly, to kiss Yukino Bijin on the lips; even if they were crumbed with bath bomb dust. It was a fizzy feeling which she genuinely enjoyed no matter the circumstance.

  “Um, excuse me, ma’am…?” a voice, terrified and exasperated, appeared from behind them.

  A chill was sent down Gold City’s spine as she turned around so that she may address the poor, beleaguered employee who had to deal with them. Meanwhile, Yukino Bijin was still enjoying her snack. Gold City awkwardly fidgeted with her hands; her ears twitched as she forced a smile.

  “Don’t worry, I’ll, um, pay for that…” she said.

  Yukino Bijin nudged Gold City then thrust the half-eaten bath bomb towards her. “You want some? It tastes really good. Mostly sugar though. Like a jawbreaker! But easier on th’ teeth.”

  “I’m right, thank you, Yukino Bijin.” Gold City told her, brushing her off as courteously as she could.

  Yukino Bijin shrugged. “Awright, if ya say so.” And then, she went back to blissfully tucking into her bath bomb.

  “Yep, don’t worry… I’ll pay.” Gold City told the Lush employee.

  “Thank you; this way then girls, I’ll – I’ll, um, ring you up.” She said.

  “Not a problem.” Gold Citu said through gritted teeth.

  She followed the employee and Gold City sighed dejectedly as she glanced back towards Yukino Bijin who was still purveying the wicker baskets of bath bombs. Thus, Gold City thought she would come to the counter prepared and got out extra money so that Yukino Bijin could buy another two bath bombs. Whether or not they would be for the intended enjoyment was a different story but honestly, as long as Yukino Bijin was happy then it was money well spent.

  With that, Gold City had decided that Yukino Bijin had gotten up to enough rabblerousing in the big city and made the executive decision to send themselves both back home. That way, they could join the other girls in the dorm for afternoon tea; although the temptation to duck into a WcDonalds was present but Yukino Bjin absolutely did not need sugar in her system. Not after eating an entire bath bomb, anyway.

  Still, despite the hiccups, Gold City had enjoyed her little quasi-date with Yukino Bijin. Together, with all their bags in tow, they stepped off the train and started to make their way back to the dorms at the school. They were slowly beginning to run out of conversation topics as Yukino Bijin had looped back to the same sort of idle musings that she had begun their morning together with.

  As they walked, Gold City still found herself enamoured with her companion. She was so cute and stupid, how could she not have fallen in love with Yukino Bijin?

  “Hey, Yukino…” Gold City murmured as they drew in closer to the school gates, breaking off Yukino Bijin’s reverie about the state of crops back home and how she didn’t mind the hot weather even if it was detrimental, but it made playing under sprinklers fun.

  “Yeah, Gold City?” Yukino Bijin chirruped; completely blanking from all her previous trains of thoughts.

  “Did you have fun today?” Gold City asked awkwardly.

  “Well of course I did!” she beamed. “I feel like a real city girl today. Going to Lush an’ buyin’ make-up. It was great fun.”

  “I’m glad.” Gold City murmured. “But, um, would consider what we went on…” Her cheeks began to go red and her heart pounded. “But would you consider it a date?”

  “Huh?” Yukino Bijin stopped right in her tracks and her eyes went as wide as dinner plates.

  Gold City stopped too, but only after taking a few regrettable steps forward because she hadn’t immediately noticed that she had stunned Yukino Bijin like that. Her palms began to sweat and her mouth dried. She worried upon worries that perhaps she had overstepped things and was now compromising her solid friendship with the wildly different Horse Girl.

  “Y-You mean… This was a…? Well I’ll be… A sexy… A sexy city girl like you Goldie… wants to take me on a date?” she asked.

  “Well, um, yes.” Gold City replied, and she was miffed by such words coming out of Yukino Bijin’s mouth; they didn’t quite suit her, but she was flattered, nonetheless.

  “Well I’ll be a monkey’s uncle…” she murmured. “Yes! Yes, a thousand times yes, Goldie!”

  “You’ll… You’ll be my girlfriend then?” Gold City asked.

  “Abso-blinking-lutely!” Yukino Bijin cried out.

  Gold City squealed in delight and she dropped her bags, without thinking, and pounced on Yukino Bijin with a great hug. She squeezed and squeezed and squeezed her newly crowned girlfriend until Yukino Bijin had to tap out due to not being able to breathe.  Reluctantly, though with much panic, Gold City did let her go.

  “Sorry.” She murmured, her face still red and she was vibrating with uncharacteristic excitement which was hugely endearing to Yukino Bijin.

  “Aw, no skin of my teeth, Goldie.” Yukino Bijin told her flippantly.

  “Do you want to, um, kiss, Yukino?” Gold City asked.

  “Would I?!” exclaimed Yukino Bijin and before Gold City could even blink, Yukino Bijin took the iniative.

  She went up on her tip-toes and planted a sloppy kiss on her girlfriend’s lips. Completely ruining Gold City’s lipstick but Gold City didn’t mind as she kissed back with just as much passion. She held onto Yukino Bijin’s tiny hands with her coarser than she imagined but she didn’t mind. She also didn’t mind how Yukino Bijin’s kiss very strongly tasted of soap and sugar and what might be blueberries.

  Eventually, they broke from their kiss with shining eyes and emptied lungs. But their bodies were filled with this reverberating excitement, exchanged through colourful smiles and lovestruck glances. It was sweet, and Gold City felt very accomplished with herself. Yukino Bijin, feeling very similar as this cushy and sweet feeling swelled in her chest.

  “We should go on another lush date soon, I reckon.” Yukino Bjin chirruped.

  “I love you, but absolutely not. I’m so not letting you eat another bath bomb.” Gold City quickly scolded her, though her expression left much to be desired. It was more cutely amused than annoyed, after all.

[yakumtsaki]

I only call you when it's half past five, the only time that I'll be by your side, I only love it when you touch me, not feel me, when I'm fucked up, that's the real me, when I'm fucked up, that's the real me, BABE ♪

Here we fucking go again, desperately trying to make the fuckboi wolf commit to a serious relationship. My plan to turn Komei into a werewolf crashed and burned last generation and Jojo has had the want locked for like 10 years and it just won’t fucking happen. I’ve never had a non-cheaty werewolf in this game, I don’t know how other people do it but I’m having a ridic hard time with it. Victor’s ghost is judging me and who can blame him.

Speaking of, Shajar’s makeover is this wolf shirt, and yes, full shade intended. I still can’t believe she rolled popularity, way to single out your weakest spot and make it your life’s purpose. I mean that would be like Wyatt rolling fam-  ..nevermind.

UGH. Will you pick a fucking attitude and stick with it you furry asshole??? 

What kind of defective cuck wolf even is this. He won’t befriend us but he won’t attack either, he just sits around with his plastic bone playing house. USELESS. I didn’t know it was possible to hate a digital animal this much..

..but here comes Maxx to defy all expectations. Happy birthday Maxx, you look so wholesome and Lassie-like, I’m sure life with you will be like a vacation!

LOL. Is antagonizing Sophie really how you want to start your adult life, Maxx?? Well I guess having eyes is overrated.

SOPHIE WTF. You beat Victor but can’t take on this flop? Where is your holy warrior spirit??

- I’m old af and starting to worry about my eternal soul, so I’m literally turning the other cheek.

Nice, thanks for nothing. God I miss Victor.

Man, Maxx has ISSUES. He doesn’t even have a mean personality or a bad relationship with the cats, why are you like this you freak??

NOOOO not the fucking pet fight club again omg MAXX YOU DICK

Great, amazing job, Goro! The real Goro is rolling in his grave. All this went down in literally under a minute after Maxx grew up, talk about determination. 

-HA, kneel before Zod!

That’s not even from Mortal Kombat, Maxx, god, can you not make this worse than it is?

-Yea like I give a shit, what am I, some kind of fatass nerd cat?? I’m a dog, bitch, I like running..

Omg.

-And playing outside..

OMG.

-And being affectionate to my owners!

STOP. Christ, what kind of monster have I brought into our lives???

-One day in and I’m already the alpha.. Who’s a good boy? Who’s a good boy? Oh yes, Maxx is.. The best boy. And soon this cat legacy.. will be history.. the Age of Dog.. is finally.. upon us. 

💔💔💔💔💔

Not that we needed further proof that Maxx was given to us straight out of Satan’s unholy womb, but guess who else loves him on top of Cyneswith?? Why, Wyatt, of course, chief of police married to a serial killer, truly the best judge of character the world has ever known. Show me your friends..

..and I’ll show you who you are. UGH DAGMAR

-As a mailwoman I’m programmed to hate your kind, but I feel such a connection between us.. It’s like the universe conspired-

GTFO. Don’t test me, istg I’ll marry you in..

..you actually don’t look half bad compared to what else is out there. Shajar brings Toadface McBooberson here home from school which. why does bigger cleavage clothing even exist for teens and why do I have it, I really need to stop downloading default replacements in the dark. Anyway, hope you’re all ready for the adventure called ‘What is Shajar’s sexual orientation/does she even have one’!

Ugh, this certainly feels familiar. Shajar please, PLEASE fight your Jojo genes, I mean everyone loves Cyneswith, this is shaping up to be Gunter/Jojo volume 2 AND I CAN’T DEAL WITH IT AGAIN

-So, Butterface, my ambition in life is to have my own music theme play whenever I enter a room, like Darth Vader or Mary Poppins-

-Isn’t the sound of people already in the room sighing enough of a theme for you?

-Well it looks like one little frog around here isn’t getting turned into a princess!

Yea, I really don’t know what I expected?? Those who do not learn history are doomed to repeat it.

Speaking of daddy dearest, let’s check in. How’s it going, Jo? Great? Thought so, ok bye-

-DON’T YOU DARE PAN AWAY AND LEAVE ME TO MY MISERY MY ASPIRATION IS SCARLET RED

I’m sorry Jo but I’m a hear no evil, see no evil, spend-legacy-time-on-no-evil type of bitch and your life just bums me out at this point. But if it’s any consolation, it’s all your fault!

-HOW THE HELL IS IT MY FAULT I DIDN’T SIGN UP FOR THIS BULLSHIT

Um, YEA YOU DID. This is generation 2, we’re barely middle class and being heir is quite literally a shit job. Of course you could have minimized the impact had you chosen someone else to marry, but you just HAD to have Wyatt Narcolepsy Monif so.. talk to you later?

-Wyatt I’m worried our ship is sinking and no amount of rotting birthday cake can ease the pain.

-Oui, my estomac hurts toό.. Nothing 14 heures of sleepé won’t remédit of coursé :)

-DIDN’T NEED SUCH A GRAPHIC REMINDER THAT LIFE IS GARBAGE

God, wtf more do you want, 15k and still whining-

-OH. Well this just has Wyatt written all over it, but omg he tried to do a household task, just got confused at the very end. Bravo, leaps and bounds!

Meanwhile Shajar is having a successful interaction with a family member!! It’s a toddler who can’t get away, but whatever, it counts. Looks like this is a game-changing night for everyone.

-YES IT REALLY IS.

Jojo how about you take a page out of Komei’s book and devote your leftover energy to cats or cooking contests or banging Marissa Bendett instead of this constant, obnoxious guilt-tripping?? Man I really didn’t appreciate Komei while I had him.

7 a.m., the usual morning lineup, start on the chores and sweep 'till the floor's all clean, polish and wax, do laundry, and mop and shine up, sweep again, and by then it's like 7:15,  

and so I'll read a book, or maybe two or three, I'll add a few new paintings to my gallery, I'll play guitar and knit, and cook and basically-

-just wonder when will my life begin? ♪

And of course that’s Victor making his nightly appearance and helping put Jojo out of his misery. What a sweetheart!

With the addition of Wulf and his 10 active points generation 3 has officially evolved past sleep, we’re talking 10/10/9 (Shajar you lazy bum) and it’s seriously exhausting. You know how when sims are asleep you can check your phone or eat smth or w/e, yea that’s simply not happening anymore, I’m in constant vigilance all night long..

..and thank god because otherwise I would have missed Allegra and Victor’s ghosts playing??? WTF MAXIS. I’ve never seen this before and it’s the rare combo of sad and adorable. Right in the feels ❤️💔

THAT WASN’T AN INVITATION TO EXPRESS YOUR SADNESS FOR THE MILLIONTH TIME JOJO

Oh “ok” it’s a cockroaches related freak-out. I don’t see anyone else crying over them but that’s Jojo for you. Exterminator bro if you’re that grossed out by a pile of dead insects I have some bad news for you regarding your profession. And while we’re on the topic of professions and crying:

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. You may recall that Wyatt has been one promotion away from his LTW for about 150 years and all we’ve been doing since is trying to amass the 8 friends needed for it. Welp, we finally got them through our blood, sweat and tears, so what does Wyatt do the day he was supposed to get promoted?? Get fired of course, what else! 

Honestly I’m not even mad, this truly is like the culmination of everything we know Wyatt to be. I mean just cast your minds back to the final moments of this post. We knew what we were getting into. Rock on, Wyatt!

-Nό, there is no disgracéd police capitaine in this maison! Quelle?? I’m not even Français! Et toi shouldn’t be calling personnes at 5 p.m when everyόné is sound asleép!

Time for the black sheep to get the full Kylo Ren treatment. Looking good, Shaj! Now let’s put that hot makeover to use-

-NO.

Here we go, HUMAN contact. Toadface was a bust so let’s try a dude. Shajar do you mind talking about something other than your dead pets??

-But I don’t want to talk about anything else!

Yea and I don’t want to overstate things but I’m getting the distinct feeling finding you a partner is gonna make Daniel’s run at it look like Californication.

Well, the data we’ve gathered so far points to Shajar being a noogiesexual, I’m sure somewhere on tumblr there already exists a pride flag for it. 

That’s right, mop up the dog piss from that grass and think about the face you present to the world.

HOW IS YOUR ASPIRATION GONE TO SHIT AGAIN. WTF ARE YOU DOING WHEN I’M NOT LOOKING, GOING AROUND FACING YOUR FEARS?? JFC

-I have a perma fear of leading the miserable life I’m trapped in.

-Oh look, my kid is potty trainted and I get 5k points.. I’m soooo happy... Definitely don’t miss my serial killer days...

Ok I can’t take this anymore, either Wyatt will have to take up more household duties..

..or we can aim for something within the realm of reality and build a robot servant instead. And if you’re thinkering you’re not whining! Everyone wins.

In the dead of the night, a time when only 12 year old children are awake and watching god knows what-

-Game of Thrones! Team Stark!

Ugh, of course you are-

-Wulf grows up! 

-Woo happy birthday Wulf! Don’t even try to come for my golden child crown, I’m as perfect as my grades.

I don’t like what Game of Thrones is doing to you, Cyn.

First thing Wulf does after his pj makeover is head for the keyboard, which makes the choice for his general makeover clear as day:

Wulf...Wolf...WOLFGANG. I mean, some things are just written in the stars..

..AND SOME THINGS AREN’T, in this case Shajar’s dating life. We get another Butterface McBooberson (wtf is it with this dress in this town) but this one is also sporting terrible hair as a bonus. Score!

Great, we’ve moved from music themes to dead pets to world domination. At least we’re committing to the Kylo persona. Butter 2.0 is into it?? Get a grip girl.

-Um why do you think I have this last century hair? I’m very into monarchy.

This is not only going non-disastrously but dare I say, well?? I can’t tell if I want it to work or not though, on one hand I’ve made my feelings about this face template abundantly clear.. on the other hand this is the first human (except her 10 nice point sister) to like Shaj.. 

..thankfully it looks like there’s no need to solve that dilemma after all. Btw at the time of this writing I literally still don’t know if Shajar is into girls or dudes, or both. No reaction to anyone whatsoever. 

Meanwhile even after the noogie Butter is super receptive and doesn’t hate us? I was as shocked as you are, if we were rich I’d think she has some ulterior motive but nop, it’s just low standards. God bless them-

-cause we made our first friend!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thank the fucking lord Shajar’s LTW isn’t friend related, take a wild guess what it is instead.. And of course, the answer is ‘become Mayor’. I can just see the banner now: ‘vote Shajar Union or face the deadly consequences’.

-Ahh my dear, finally, no screaming toddlers ruining my life while you pretend you can’t hear them.. Now I can slowly start un-resenting you.. Maybe there’s hope for this marriage after all..

Not if Cyneswith has anything to do with it! After spending her entire childhood cockblocking by sleeping in her parents’ bed, she literally grew up just as they were about to woohoo for the first time in 10 years. how in character. Wanna know what isn’t in character??? Hold on to your seats, everyone..

............

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..............................................

OK THEN. Much like Wolfgang there is but one appropriate look for the above:

Did anyone think fucking Lolita Cyneswith was remotely possible, let alone probable?? ROMANCE?? And into the elderly???? I thought that combo was bad enough, I mean then you bring in the tinkering factor on top of it and it’s like, Waylon Fairchild and college profs won’t know what hit them.. How naive I was. Things can always, always get worse, and in this family, they usually do. You can probably tell where I’m going with this.. Fast forward a few days and the LTW shows up..

..........................................yup. You know it’s been months and you’d think I’d have articulated a response by now that isn’t just screaming or miscellaneous incoherent sounds, and yet! what can I say, sometimes emotions are so powerful that words fail us. In lieu of a written reaction please listen to this song after the specified time stamp. It’s 3 minutes long and the only lyric is ‘oh no’.

[ot-hoe-me]

OC: Kanon Fujiwara

For IF: @lemonade-if​

Name: Kanon Fujiwara

Gender: F (she/her)

Age: 16-18

Ethnicity: Japanese

Appearance: Pale skinned with long straight dark lavender hair with straight blunt end bangs and gray eyes. Standing at 5′7″ she’s also slim with slight curves, and has a beauty mark under the outer corner of her left eye.

Club: Music

Best Friend: Leila Ozaki

Love Interest(s): Hikaru Takeuchi and Yuushin Mikazuki (different playthroughs...yes she has The RANGE)

General Info: Kanon is actually an OC I originally created for IDOLiSH7 after I saw the first season of the anime, but I knew she wasn’t going to be used in any great capacity, but I created headcanons for her and interactions with some of the characters nonetheless. The relevant info for her is that her grandfather was a famous violinist who doted on her a lot while he was alive and who she inherited her love of music from. Because of him she wants to become a composer and create music for film, television, video games, etc. But instead of both of her parents disapproving of her dream like in the i7 universe, in this universe only her mom disapproves (or so she thinks.) 

Anyway, thanks to homeroom-sensei and the karaoke ask we know that Love Live! exists as fiction in the Lemonade Universe and therefore IDOLiSH7 exists as fiction as well. (Her and sensei can bond over their love fictional idol group music LOL.) So like in the i7 headcanons Kanon’s grandfather Kazuma died a year before canon starts and she goes for a walk by herself after his funeral and that’s when she first hears TRIGGER’s song ‘Heavenly Visitor’ and she becomes captivated by their singing and lyrics. The timing of it all convinces her that it’s a sign from her Grandfather to continue on striving to make her dream come true even though her grief made it hard to even think about. Just like he would want her to. This of course leads her to downloading the IDOLiSH7 game on her phone, and leading Gaku to become her TRIGGER bias and Riku to become her i7 bias. In any case, make fun of her all you want for holding two fictional idol groups in such high esteem, but they bring her happiness and inspiration. Plus it doesn’t harm anyone. (She even rearranges Heavenly Visitor from a pop song to a classical love ballad arrangement either for an assignment or just because she wanted to.)

OKAY now to Lemonade-only. So she’s not grieving so much in this, but that’s partly because she doesn’t have time to what with the constant moving and now her parents’ divorce. Her general reaction to it is wondering why they couldn’t find a compromise and just work things out. Part of it is that she’s a hopeless romantic, but the bigger part of it is that in the Lemonade universe Kanon has become a big people-pleaser because of her constant moving around, and also trying to get her parents to make up. This has lead to her to becoming bad at setting personal boundaries unlike in her i7 iteration who can stand up for herself. So honestly, it’s a good thing that so far she hasn’t been stuck in one place for too long because so far no one has had the opportunity to take advantage of her in a bad way. Also unlike her i7 self she also has fairly unnoticeable social anxiety because of her wanting to avoid any type of conflict, which lead to her people-pleasing ways and bad boundary setting. So nearly unnoticeable that she’s unaware of it herself. (Whereas i7 Kanon doesn’t have social anxiety at all and can be thought of a relaxed extrovert.)

So all of the above, coupled with the fact with that she’s a very gentle, kind and patient girl makes it obvious what she can give and receive in her friendship with Leila, and in a romantic relationship with either Hikaru or Yuushin. Leila will help Kanon to learn to stand up for herself, set boundaries, and let loose and have fun in a group of her peers and forgetting her self-imposed rules and duties in regards to her parents for a while. While Kanon will help Leila be hmm, gentler? Maybe more patient? But I definitely know that Leila is kind already so not that. And they both give each other someone they can share their equal passion and enthusiasm for music with. Also, besides being a musical prodigy in writing music, Kanon can also sing...(But will also do everything she can to help her friend find her friend and bandmate. And do it because she genuinely cares about Leila and the music club members, not because she wants them to like her to no longer be the outsider.) 

Kanon and Hikaru are both similar in their helping-people-out can-do attitude so in a romance they will stand up for each other. Also, maybe witnessing someone they love like struggling with setting boundaries, both of them will realize how since they don’t want to see the other suffer with the same thing they themselves struggle with that they need to change and that they need to help the other person change as well for a healthier, happier life. Plus they will also get a built-in cheerleader/number one supporter in the other and will always want to know more and happily listen to what the other is passionate about even if they don’t understand it. It’s cinnamon roll x cinnamon roll here.

Then there’s Kanon and Yuushin. Besides the obvious ‘someone has to be stupid to mess with Yuushin’s significant other’ through his reputation factor, he will also make Kanon feel cared for and protected through his actions as well. In return, Kanon will protect Yuushin’s heart by treating unfailingly treating him with gentleness and kindness, not making snap judgments and taking the time to form her own opinion on him and always willing to lend an ear or an excuse to maybe delay going home earlier than he would like to. (I am NOT saying this in a filthy way, ya nasties, whoever thought that way.) Basically, she would be the bubble wrap to his sharp corners, rather than the sandpaper to his rough edges. (Though maybe the latter, in time. He would gentle himself around her I think.) They would eventually find peace in each other.

Student Interviews and More Outfits Under the Cut~

Bonus:

“Kanon-chan? We’re in the same music class together and she’s really nice! And totally a genius! When I was having trouble playing this one song on my flute she had me play for her again, and after listening only once she could fix all my mistakes. After correcting my finger placement to play the correct notes of the song I played perfectly after that! She didn’t make fun of me or anything. It’s a real shame for her that she’s not in a special arts college, she’d totally kill it!...But I’m glad she’s here. H-hey I don’t mean that in a bad way, I swear!!”

“Hmm...? Wha-! I WASN’T SLEEPING SENSEI I SWEAR!!! *Ahem.* Geez, don’t scare me like that. I thought you were a teacher and that I was gonna get detention another time this week...my parents would kill me...Anyway, what’d you wanna know? Fujiwara-chan huh? Yeah she’s cute, nice too. She even volunteered to help me clean the classroom one day last week after school as one of my punishments for falling asleep. Everyone knows that chalkboard duty is the worst, but she did while I cleaned the floors and stuff. She even thought to smudge chalk on my face and blazer to make it look like I did it before she left and sensei came back to check on my progress. ...She’s surprisingly stealthy y’know? Actually, now that I think about it, she’s way too nice. Especially to a guy like me she hardly knows. She even gave me her bento since I forgot mine this morning!! Could it be...? Does she really...!? *Mumbles* ...Wife Material...”

“Fujiwara?? Her??? Hmph. There’s not much to say really. She’s a music geek. She’s classically pretty I guess, and has many of the boys fawning over her ‘doll-like appearance.’ But she doesn’t have much else going for her, you know? She has such a bland personality. She doesn’t have any opinions of her own, it seems like. And quite frankly it’s annoying what a pristine record she has, really. Suspicious even, considering how many times she’s transferred schools over the years. Everyone has skeletons in their closet and she’s no different. I’ll find out what she’s hiding from everyone! I’ll expose the truth!! I’LL SHOW EVERYONE AND THEN THEY’LL ALL FINALLY SEE WHO MISS. PERFECT REALLY IS-!!!”

“AHHH~! You want to ask ME about Fujiwara-san don’t you? Well of COURSE you do! I AM the Fujiwara-san Fan Club President after all~! Just let it be known that I am seriously offended that you came to speak with me last of all, out of EVERYONE in this school. Seriously-! *Ahem* Anyway, back on topic. Many people think that Fujiwara-san is a one-note player *snickers* either just a pretty face or do-gooding teacher’s pet, but that’s simply not true! HOW I know this, you ask? Well, it all goes back to the reason for the founding of the Fujiwara-san Fan Club. You see, I was just walking out the school gates when I heard it...the dulcet notes of the piano. Which made me realize that I forgot my sheet music in the music room. So, you see, I simply had to go back to fetch it for my weekend practice as any budding musician worth their salt would do. Of course I was also curious about the student musician who was currently playing, but it was not top of mind, not at that moment anyway. But of course knowing what I know now, looking back, I should have been more curious. MUCH more curious than I was. But I eventually saw the light. For you see, as I ascended the staircase and turned onto the hallway, those notes wrapped around me, ensnared me, and right then I knew that I must know the identity of the mysterious musician! And then- and then-! Who other than our lovely Fujiwara-san! Our very own Angel of Music! To be behind that heavenly sound! And as I glimpsed into the music room transformed into the Amphitheater of the Gods - I saw! There was no sheet music on stand of the piano! Or anywhere to be seen! She was either playing from memory- something unfamiliar to me- or- OR I SAY the Muses whispered unto her lovely ears and she composed on the spot!!! And what’s more, a true expression of bliss! Ah, I knew right then and there that I would die for that music! For that smile! That voice! Truly, she possesses a passion unmatched!! Fujiwara-san is the Protege of the Gods of Music!!! Right then and there I vowed that I would spread their gospel, the Gospel of Heavens as transcribed by Her Hand! ...I know that look. That scorching gaze of scepticism and doubt. But if you had heard what I heard, and saw what I saw, you would surely be transformed just as I was. Just as we all, of the Fujiwara-san Fan Club, were. Come, and I will show you...”  

Casual:

Festival Date:

[jarrettfuller]

Put a bird on it

Prologue The most challenging design projects, they say, are the ones you do for yourself. Without parameters and constraints, timelines and clients, you miss the checks and balances that can often guide the process. The markers that tell you you're on the right track, moving in the right direction, are absent. When I was an undergraduate, I had a class where we had to design personal logos we could use on letterhead, stationery, and business cards in preparation for our impending job searches. It was honestly the hardest project of my college years.

Part 1: A Love Story On January 8, 2017, I proposed to my girlfriend, Eurry. It was three years to the day since our first date. We had met over a video conference when we both were working at Facebook; I was in San Francisco and she was in New York. I was a designer and she was a data researcher. One day in the middle of December, my team's project manager asked if I had some time to work on a small data visualization project for someone on the data team in New York. I reluctantly agreed. 'Small projects' always seemed to turn into 'big projects' and this was a team we hadn't worked with before. But a meeting was scheduled and I walked in knowing nothing. I was caught off guard when a cute girl wearing a black and white striped sweater from the New York office popped up on the video screen. I vaguely remember saying something to my project manager when we left the meeting about how cool Eurry seemed. I immediately sent her a Facebook friend request.

A few weeks later she was in the California office and we met in person to go over updates on the project. The meeting quickly turned into friendly conversation about our lives, discovering all sorts of shared interests. I didn't want the meeting to end. The next time she was in town, we went out for drinks and we have talked every day since, beginning what became a multi-year, bicoastal long distance relationship. We became best friends and fell in love.

We both eventually left Facebook — I went to graduate school and she went to work on Hillary Clinton's presidential campaign. We traveled, tried countless new restaurants, met each other's families, watched a lot of movies, and laughed a lot. We started talking about marriage, about moving in together, about our future. And then on a freezing, snowy morning last January after I pulled a ring from my pocket, I asked her to marry me. Through tears she said 'duh'.

But the story I'm writing here is not one of our relationship or of planning a wedding or even our wedding day. That's a story we want to save for our friends and family. Our married friends told us how all-consuming wedding planning can be so we decided early on that we'd share the planning responsibilities and take ownership over the parts we respectively cared more about. Eurry has stronger opinions about drinks, for example, so she'd handle the bar menu while I cared more about music and was tasked with choosing songs for our first dance and processional. You probably see where this is going: I was in charge of the visual design. And the visual design, it turned out, would be a special kind of challenge. This is a story about that process.

Part 2: Location, Location, Location Designing for our wedding became the hardest design project I've ever completed; certainly more challenging than those personal logos I did in college. It wasn't just about how I could represent our wedding visually but how to represent our entire relationship visually. We knew we wanted it to feel different — we wanted something casual and fun, informal and nontraditional. And we both desperately wanted to avoid the cliche calligraphy so dominant in wedding design these days. Almost immediately after we got engaged, I created a massive Illustrator file where I began setting our names in nearly every typeface I own in search of an interesting lockup or style that might emerge (perhaps something interesting with the double R's in both our names? Nope, too obvious), but for a long time it felt like I was going in circles, unable to figure out what our wedding should look like.

The biggest decision we had to make, however, was where we wanted to get married. One weekend last spring, we were sitting on the couch with our laptops looking at potential venues when Eurry found the John James Audubon House, located right outside Philadelphia and just forty-five minutes from where I grew up. We immediately knew this was where we wanted to get married. Audubon was a naturalist and a painter, most known for his paintings of birds. In an ambitious quest, he set out to paint every bird in North America, discovering at least twenty-five new species in the process. These paintings are collected in his famous book, The Birds of North America, which is considered the best ornithological work ever completed. This was Audubon's first home in North America and has since been converted to a public park, bird conservatory, and museum in his honor. We scheduled a visit a few weeks later and fell in love with the property — there was a beautiful apple orchard where we planned to hold the ceremony and an old barn perfect for a party. We picked a date and booked it.

It feels like cheating, but the venue helped clarify the visual design. The Audubon Society has made most of Audubon's paintings available in the public domain and offers high resolution reproductions as free downloads. I could use these images in the design! We both have love of birds and have a secret ambitions to get into birding. In fact, very early in our relationship, we laughed in amazement at how both of us had similar framed images of birds hanging in our apartments. Add the owl references from our favorite show and our love of Portlandia, a bird-themed wedding seemed perfect.

Part 3: Put a Bird On It With the venue booked and a library of high-resolution bird paintings on my hard drive, the design started to take shape. I went through countless typefaces — some were too formal and others too playful. I settled on ITC Serif Gothic for the logotype and Pitch for the accent typography. Serif Gothic is a typeface I've always admired but had yet to find an appropriate use for and Pitch has become a favorite monospace. Paired together, they immediately gave the design something that felt unique — blending the classic with the casual, the fun with the traditional.

I knew this would have to be treated like a brand — as it would be applied to everything from save the dates to name tags, invitations to menus — and needed to be flexible enough to work across mediums and scales. I decided we could allow design system to slowly reveal itself — using the incremental mailings, save the dates, invites, and RSVPs, to allow the entire aesthetic to unfold, each piece to increase in complexity and vibrancy as we got closer to the wedding day. The Save the Date cards that went out to our guests six months before the wedding were a simple black and white card, printed on a crisp white 130lb paper. A small vector bird perched atop an 'r' in Eurry's name hinted at the larger theme, the forest green envelopes previewed the color palette.

We directed guests to visit our website — eurryandjarrett.com — for travel and hotel details, links to our gift registry, and more information about the day itself. We used the website to introduce the venue and Audubon's paintings. The colors — forest green, a silvery-blue, and light pink — were pulled from a few of our favorite birds.

Three months later, the official invitations went out. Packaged in light blue envelopes, the invitations first appear to be black and white: the nameplate we introduced on the Save the Dates is on the front and opens for more information and RSVP details. But the invitation folds out one more time to reveal a large poster featuring a collage of Audubon's paintings, including the birds from which we pulled our colors as well as the state birds of California (where Eurry was born and where we met), Indiana (where I was born), New York (where we live now), and Pennsylvania (where I grew up and where we were getting married). We wanted something memorable — something that might not just be hung up on the refrigerator or thrown away after the wedding, but a piece of art our guests could remember our wedding by.

Part 4: The Day The design came together in a 20-page booklet I designed in place of a traditional program that included not only details about the day but also family photographs, a few of our favorite recipes, fun facts, and thank yous. Again, we wanted something people would want to keep — a scrapbook of sorts that our guests would feel invested in as they found photos of themselves and learn more about us and our story. The cover of the book expanded the collage from the invitation to include images of some of our favorite things and memorable moments in our relationship: the flowers from Eurry's bouquet, Twin Peaks and Portlandia, doughnuts, succulents, the Facebook sign, gummy bears, and ice cream.

Collage has become a go-to visual style of mine and is central to my own design process. For our wedding, I realized it could once again allow me to include everything we love instead of trying to find a color or style that somehow represented all of us. A key in the back of the book gave descriptions of everything hidden in the collage. This gave us variety in the design system while retaining a clear, distinct style; at once simple and diverse.

The venue offered their own signage, menus, and table numbers but we swapped them out for custom designs to match our design system. For dinner, three dishes were offered — chicken, fish, and vegetarian — and we asked our guests to select their preference on the RSVP cards. Their selections were noted on the name tags with small iconography to help the servers. (One of my favorite details: one couple brought their young child, who was served chicken fingers, and we noted his selection with a baby chick!). The florist decorated the tables forest green table clothes, navy napkins, and natural arrangements of ferns, succulents, and monstera. I designed table numbers that had Audubon's birds wrapped around each number, set in Serif Gothic that were placed in each arrangement. A small box with custom labels of black cherry gummy bears were set at each guest's plate as a small gift of thanks.

Beverages were offered before the ceremony started and were labeled with matching signage and drinks menus were displayed at the bar giving details on the wine and beer offerings. For the visitors who came in from out of town, a small gift bag was left in their hotel room with a few of our favorite things and a small postcard detailing the event (including the school bus that brought guests from the hotel to the venue!) and thanking them for coming into town. As if designing a brand system, every interaction our guests had at the wedding had been customized to match our design, from arriving at the hotel to the thank you notes sent out after. Each piece was fully branded and could stay on its own yet when brought together, created a narrative of our relationship.

It was fun to see it all come together and I enjoyed watching people read the booklets before the ceremony began. We couldn't have done it without the amazing team at Audubon and Jeffrey Miller Catering, who put it all together exactly like we wanted it. You can see more images of the design here.

Epilogue At the beginning of the summer, we got married in a barn in front of the people we love the most just as it began to rain. As we were pronounced husband and wife, Carly Rae Jepson's I Really Like You started playing. We moved to the pavilion where speeches brought us to tears; we ate and drank and thanked every guest for being there and being a part of our lives; we danced into the night as the rain poured outside.

The entire day feels like a blur to me. It was hard to take it all in. All the planning, all the designing, all the celebrating felt like a whirlwind. You know you've been to a good party, I think, when you have no pictures to remember it by. You were so in the moment you forgot to stop and document it. When we talked to our families the next day, none of us had any photos. So when we got our wedding photos back last week, we poured through every single one, reliving the day as spectators, piecing together the memories we had made. The same is true of the design. Designing for my own wedding was easily the hardest design project of my life because this wasn't another design or branding project but a scrapbook of our lives so far and a commemoration of our new life together. This was how we'd remember the day. Working on these pieces consumed our lives for the few months leading up the wedding and though it was just a small part of a day filled with friends and family and laughing and dancing and eating and drinking and birds and love. They serve as markers in time, totems for ourselves and our family and friends. Another way to remember a perfect day. It was the best day of my life. The next day, my face hurt from smiling so much.

[scrollthebreakfasttable-blog]

Breakfast with Desi

In today’s social media world, there are two types of art that, in the eyes of many, are oversaturated. In the city of Atlanta a phrase I’ve heard often, and have even used: “throw a rock in any direction and you’ll either hit a photographer or a SoundCloud rapper.” But while I was sitting there, scrolling through her Instagram, I felt nervous, because the woman that was about to sit down with me isn’t just any photographer. I was sitting down with Deseri Rice, one of the best photographers in Atlanta.

To me, Beyonce, Solange, Yara Shahidi, Zendaya, Janelle Monae, Ava DuVernay, Lupita, and Deseri Rice, are top of the list when I think of the phrase Black Girl Magic. Each of these women are trailblazers, visionaries, and undeniable talents. For anyone who ever modeled for Desi, the feeling of being in front of her camera is completely different from other shoots. Normally you’re focused on giving a look, or appearing to follow a certain aesthetic. Desi frees you from that, and is one of the few photographers who truly captures you as you are, as your truest self. After a friendly hug I decided to dive into some questions.

What got you into photography?

I’ve always been into the fashion ads in magazines and editing my profile pics for myspace. It wasn’t until my Intro to Photography class that I discovered it as my passion. After learning the controls I took it and ran with it.

How do you pick your people? Ever turn anybody down that got mad about it?

I feel as if everyone has their own uniqueness about them. It may not be as evident as some but I take it as a challenge. I haven’t really turn anyone away. If it’s not one of my concepts then it’s a paid gig and usually that filters out the ones I’m not creatively connected to. Honestly if my models are passionate about the project and really into it, it always works out. I will say I’ve had a few that aren’t on the same creative plane and I just let that dissolve on its own naturally. But I encourage everyone to find themselves in front of the camera.

Your tag is deseritheartist but every time I hear people talk about you they say “Desi The God”. Why not take that handle?

I’m honored of the title honestly. I don’t mind others calling me that but I rather not call myself a God for personal reasons. I played around with the spelling and still felt uneasy. Also I don’t want others that don’t know me the wrong impression of me calling myself that.

I honestly find this part fascinating. Myself included, ego has always played a major role in the world of entertainment, from the justified confidence of Grammy winners, to has beens like Bow Wow and his lies about private jets. The concept of “fake it ‘till you make it” and showing out for an audience has always seemed extremely important, but from what I can see, faking anything is beyond Desi. She’s real, she’s honest, and she’s kind. That’s a major breath of fresh air, one I think everyone who meets her appreciates. As usual, I start to lose focus after my strawberry pancakes arrive, so I went back to asking questions so I wouldn’t have to do much talking.

At what point in a shoot do you look and go “Oh shit, I did that!”? When do you know you’ve taken the perfect shot?

During photo sessions I get this high feeling like mid session after me and the sitter(s) have warmed up and I just let go. This feeling doesn’t happen every session which doesn’t mean those shots weren’t good but some of my best shots comes from that feeling. It’s like I’ve caught the photo holy ghost lol.That feeling man, I can't explain it. After i see the result from that feeling, that’s always my reaction. I really be in awe sometimes while editing, that’s when it hits me the most.

Top 3 models/celebrities you’d love to shoot?

There’s not many I follow. But i find Kiko Mizuhara, Luka Sabbat, and Kwollem style very intriguing. There’s more but definitely my top three.

Desi laughed when I passed on my idea that a collaboration between herself and Zendaya would probably snatch every wig in existence.

Top 3 magazines you’d love to do a cover shoot for?

There are a few that I’d like to work with like Blanc, MODZIK, and Pause Magazine. I’m actually working on my own, AU COURANT, be on the lookout.

Desi has recently announced that AU COURANT is still in development but a release date has not yet been chosen. Check her social media for updates on that via her instagram @deseritheartist

Cosmo? Essence? Or Vogue?

It would be cool to have a spread in all of these.

For your IG followers, your story is always lit. Seems like you always find the dope events and shows. In Atlanta there’s an event every 10 feet, so what’s your secret to avoiding wackness?

I really love these questions lol I’ve had several people come up to me like “Yo, Des what’s the move?” There’s tons of things to do in Atlanta just gotta be plugged in. If the vibe isn’t right I leave immediately. My secret is follow the DJ’s lol the ones you really like have a following with similar taste and you can never go wrong with the crowd.

One example of this that any follower of Desi’s knows is her friendship with an incredible DJ known as Thrice Groove. Thrice is slowly but surely taking over Atlanta, and Desi has been there to witness the way he dominates a room with his amazing sound.

Top 10 songs on your playlist right now?

Out of a trillion? I flip flop a lot between decades and genres so I revisit a lot like the song just dropped.  Lol in no order.

Blossom Dearie - Ravyn Lenae

Supposed to Say Goodbye - Etta bond & Raf Riley

Pick it Up - Famous Dex

Dam Girl - Frills

Vogue -Full Crate

Mi Gente - J.Balvin & Willy William

Due to Me- Jean Deaux

Distractions I: The opposite sex - Kilo Kish

Hold It Down - Mia Gladstone

Get Money - Michael Da Vinci

Despite my extensive music library I feel a tinge of shame for not recognizing a single name listed, and make a mental note to download every single artist later. Aside from a great photographer’s eye, Desi also has an amazing ear for music, so anything she reccomends is usually dope.

So in today’s social media age, there’s photographers who literally get paid to live with and follow influencers. What’s the dollar amount you’d do that for? Or never ever?

Depends. If i really f with that person’s vision and I have full creative flexibility then I’d do it as long as my living expenses are taken care of. I’ve actually never heard of this.

At this moment I pull of my phone and show her my favorite example, a talented guy out of LA known as Brendan North, who until a few months ago, would follow Logan Paul. With a simple “oh, cool” she goes back to her food.

3 breakfast must haves?

Eggwhite Omelette, all the veggies and pepper jack cheese. Breakfast potatoes with veggies. My mom’s grits with cheese (very particular about my grits)

I laugh a little because while she works her way through her healthy omelette, I’m still waging war on the Colorado Omelette, which is the exact opposite of healthy. If I wanted to I could probably come up with some correlation between her talent, incredible vibe, and responsible eating, but I’d rather pretend there’s unrelated and not give up my Colorado Omelettes.

Last month Desi put on an amazing event called Only On Thursdays. She did one last year that went amazingly well, and this one also did not disappoint. In fact, Breakfast Table has the honor of being one of the vendors. It was the perfect place for artists to represent themselves on an equal, and supportive, playing field.

What is “Only On Thursdays”? Only On Thursday’s originated from me wanted to showcase my work gallery style but also involve the music scene in Atlanta that I want to share with my friends. Also to bring back that portfolio review feel from college. I felt like I lost my creative mojo once I graduated because projects aren’t forced on me anymore. My main goal is bring together everything I love and give local photographers and artist a platform to present their work. Many are scared to take that step. This event is for everyone to get inspired and take that leap. So far I’ve helped maybe 4 artist showcase their talents for the first time and hopefully it doesn’t stop there.

How do you decide what artists to put in your show? I do not do open calls for artist. They are carefully picked by what I believe will flow well with the collection and from whom I gain inspiration. They aren’t super famous artist, they might not have a collection by the time I contact them. Really just your everyday artist coming together for something awesome.

You have this crazy soulful element to your photos, it’s like, you can identify a Desi shot out of a group. So, my last question: Do you realize how dope you are? Lol i’m just me.

I believe with all my heart that someday, Desi herself, and the world, will realize her greatness.

-Amelia