#horror is a genre filled with a lot of triggering and questionable stuff so feel free to ask or do research on your own

[she-who-fights-and-writes]

She-who-fights-and-writes Coronacation Book Rec List

I know that a lot of people are stuck at home right now in dire need of entertainment, so I decided I’d put out a book recommendations list of all the books I’m currently reading and all of my must-reads!

(Just a note that a lot of these are Fantasy because I’m a fantasy nerd haha)

Books/Series I am currently reading

1. The Folk of the Air Trilogy by Holly Black (Currently on #2, The Wicked King)

Genre: High Fantasy

Setting: The land of Faerie which is kind of historical, but in the human world it is modern day

Main cast :

Jude Duarte (white, human, cutthroat, if I saw her in a Denny’s Parking Lot at 3am I would RUN)

Cardan Greenbriar (white, faerie, the true embodiment of Bastard)

Vivienne (Jude’s half-sister, lesbian with canon gf, half-human half-faerie, I would totally try to be her friend)

Taryn Duarte (Jude’s twin sister, queen doormat, still, I would take a bullet for her she’s jUST TRYING TO FIT IN)

Rating: 5/5 Stars

These books have been on my “To Read” list for so long now and for some reason I just never got around to reading them! Hands-down, these are some of the best high fantasy books that I’ve read in a long, long while.

I finished the first book, The Cruel Prince, in just two days and rated it 5/5 stars! Even though these books are high fantasy and focus on the traditions and ways of life of faeries, somehow all of the characters seem like I could meet them in real life!

The main character actually has genuine flaws and not just “””“flaws”””” and is a Bad Bitch down with murder, and the plot had me on the edge of my seat from page one!

The summary makes it sound like it’s going to be about their romance, but it’s really mostly about a power struggle and Jude being a badass.

Goodreads summary for The Cruel Prince:

Jude was seven when her parents were murdered and she and her two sisters were stolen away to live in the treacherous High Court of Faerie. Ten years later, Jude wants nothing more than to belong there, despite her mortality. But many of the fey despise humans. Especially Prince Cardan, the youngest and wickedest son of the High King. To win a place at the Court, she must defy him–and face the consequences. As Jude becomes more deeply embroiled in palace intrigues and deceptions, she discovers her own capacity for trickery and bloodshed. But as betrayal threatens to drown the Courts of Faerie in violence, Jude will need to risk her life in a dangerous alliance to save her sisters, and Faerie itself.

2. The Raven Cycle Series by Maggie Stiefvater (Currently on #1, The Raven Boys)

Genre: Present-Day/Realistic Fantasy (?)

Setting: The fictional town of Henrietta, Virginia

I haven’t gotten around to much of the book, so there’s not much I can tell you about the characters and I can’t properly give it a rating yet.

These books were also on my “To Read” list for a while; I was a huge fan of her book The Scorpio Races and have also been looking for something to quench my thirst for “private school/ghosts/magic” that I’ve been dealing with ever since I read The Ninth House by Leigh Bardugo.

I’ve only JUST started The Raven Cycle yesterday, but so far I am hooked! I’m super worried because I’m TERRIBLE at juggling two series at a time but both of these are just so interesting! 

Goodreads Summary for The Raven Boys:

“There are only two reasons a non-seer would see a spirit on St. Mark’s Eve,” Neeve said. “Either you’re his true love . . . or you killed him.” It is freezing in the churchyard, even before the dead arrive. Every year, Blue Sargent stands next to her clairvoyant mother as the soon-to-be dead walk past. Blue herself never sees them—not until this year, when a boy emerges from the dark and speaks directly to her. His name is Gansey, and Blue soon discovers that he is a rich student at Aglionby, the local private school. Blue has a policy of staying away from Aglionby boys. Known as Raven Boys, they can only mean trouble. But Blue is drawn to Gansey, in a way she can’t entirely explain. He has it all—family money, good looks, devoted friends—but he’s looking for much more than that. He is on a quest that has encompassed three other Raven Boys: Adam, the scholarship student who resents all the privilege around him; Ronan, the fierce soul who ranges from anger to despair; and Noah, the taciturn watcher of the four, who notices many things but says very little. For as long as she can remember, Blue has been warned that she will cause her true love to die. She never thought this would be a problem. But now, as her life becomes caught up in the strange and sinister world of the Raven Boys, she’s not so sure anymore.

MY MUST-READ BOOK LIST

1. The Gentleman’s Guide to Vice and Virtue by Mackenzi Lee

Genre: Historical Fiction

Setting: 1700s Europe (England, Paris, Barcelona, Marseilles, Venice)

Main cast (I’ll try my best not to spoil anything because you find out a LOT of different stuff about these characters throughout the book):

Henry “Monty” Montague (white, bi/pansexual, attitude problem)

Percy Newton (mixed race, gay, very sweet boy, definitely got “most likely to bring home to mom” in the yearbook)

Felicity Montague (white, Monty’s little sister, headcanoned as asexual, I love her to death)

Rating: 5/5 Stars

Daring adventure, gay representation, historical setting, hilarious characters!

This book literally has it all! I would consider it one of my favorite books of all time, yet for some reason I’ve never gotten around to reading any of the sequel books! The ending is very satisfying and ties everything together, which I feel is part of the reason why I haven’t gotten around to them yet. 

Therefore, it can serve as a one-shot read or a full series if you want to dive into something good!

The humor made me laugh out loud at points and all of the characters are very real and very, very relatable, not to mention the vivid settings of 1700s Europe!

Goodreads summary:

Henry “Monty” Montague was born and bred to be a gentleman, but he was never one to be tamed. The finest boarding schools in England and the constant disapproval of his father haven’t been able to curb any of his roguish passions—not for gambling halls, late nights spent with a bottle of spirits, or waking up in the arms of women or men. But as Monty embarks on his Grand Tour of Europe, his quest for a life filled with pleasure and vice is in danger of coming to an end. Not only does his father expect him to take over the family’s estate upon his return, but Monty is also nursing an impossible crush on his best friend and traveling companion, Percy. Still it isn’t in Monty’s nature to give up. Even with his younger sister, Felicity, in tow, he vows to make this yearlong escapade one last hedonistic hurrah and flirt with Percy from Paris to Rome. But when one of Monty’s reckless decisions turns their trip abroad into a harrowing manhunt that spans across Europe, it calls into question everything he knows, including his relationship with the boy he adores.

2. The Ninth House By Leigh Bardugo

Genre: Horror, Fantasy 

Setting: Yale University and the town of New Haven, Present Day

Main cast:

Galaxy “Alex” Stern (Hispanic, sees dead people, very scary)

Daniel Arlington “Darlington” (white, rich, an angel who can sometimes be a dick)

Pamela Dawes (tbh I honestly don’t remember what she looks like, only that she’s a tired grad student with big nerd energy)

Detective Alan Turner (Black, takes shit from nobody, husband material)

Rating: 4/5 Stars

(NOTE: THIS IS VERY DARK ADULT FICTION AND CONTAINS MATERIAL THAT MAY BE TRIGGERING FOR SOME PEOPLE, WOULD NOT RECOMMEND FOR PEOPLE UNDER 16)

This book is a great read for someone who’s looking for a disturbing, gritty book with layers upon layers of secrets that you have to peel away as the mystery unfolds. I love the secret societies and the intricate magic systems that the book introduces, and it actually made me hungry for more books like it!

 Alex is a three-dimensional, very real character who also serves as an unreliable narrator who witholds or warps the information that she’s telling you, making the narrative all the more riveting.

The only issues that I have with it are the fact that Leigh Bardugo kind of just dumps you in the middle of it without explaining stuff first, to the point where it kind of feels like you’re reading the second installment of a series rather than the first one, so things can get a bit confusing at first.

The book also can drag and draw things out for a bit too long, but once the plot fully kicks into gear, you will not be able to put it down!

Goodreads summary:

Galaxy “Alex” Stern is the most unlikely member of Yale’s freshman class. Raised in the Los Angeles hinterlands by a hippie mom, Alex dropped out of school early and into a world of shady drug dealer boyfriends, dead-end jobs, and much, much worse. By age twenty, in fact, she is the sole survivor of a horrific, unsolved multiple homicide. Some might say she’s thrown her life away. But at her hospital bed, Alex is offered a second chance: to attend one of the world’s most elite universities on a full ride. What’s the catch, and why her? Still searching for answers to this herself, Alex arrives in New Haven tasked by her mysterious benefactors with monitoring the activities of Yale’s secret societies. These eight windowless “tombs” are well-known to be haunts of the future rich and powerful, from high-ranking politicos to Wall Street and Hollywood’s biggest players. But their occult activities are revealed to be more sinister and more extraordinary than any paranoid imagination might conceive.

3. The Lunar Chronicles by Marissa Meyer

Genre: Sci-Fi/Fantasy

Setting: Earth, Space, The Moon

Main cast :

Linh Cinder (Chinese, based on Cinderella, cyborg, certified badass)

Scarlet Benoit (French, based on Little Red Riding Hood, farmer who is not afraid to shoot you)

Cress Darnel (White, based on Rapunzel, nerd, I will protect her with my life if I have to)

Kaito “Kai” (Chinese, based on Prince Charming, kind of has to run a whole country, a very kind soul, deserves a nap)

Carswell Thorne (White, based off of Rapunzel’s Prince, bastard)

Winter Hayle (Black, based off of Snow White, royalty, has super special powers)

Wolf (Race unspecified, based off of the Big Bad Wolf, charming killing machine, furry????) 

Rating: 5/5 Stars

Do you like fairy tales?

Have you ever wanted to know what fairy tales would be like if they took place in the FUTURE instead of the PAST? 

Do you like an amazing, hilarious cast paired with a super interesting plot? 

These are the books for you!

I haven’t read them in so long, but I remember how much joy I felt while devouring these pages. Definitely something you will not able to put down!

Goodreads Summary for Book #1: Cinder: 

Humans and androids crowd the raucous streets of New Beijing. A deadly plague ravages the population. From space, a ruthless lunar people watch, waiting to make their move. No one knows that Earth's fate hinges on one girl. . . . Cinder, a gifted mechanic, is a cyborg. She's a second-class citizen with a mysterious past, reviled by her stepmother and blamed for her stepsister's illness. But when her life becomes intertwined with the handsome Prince Kai's, she suddenly finds herself at the center of an intergalactic struggle, and a forbidden attraction. Caught between duty and freedom, loyalty and betrayal, she must uncover secrets about her past in order to protect her world's future.

4. The Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller

Genre: Fantasy

Setting: Ancient Greece

Main cast:

Patroclus (Greek, Gay, quiet pining) 

Achilles (Greek, gay, very strong, student athlete energy)

Brisies (Anatolian, clever, literally the only one in this story who has a brain cell)

Rating: 100000/5 stars

This is basically the Iliad but if historians hadn’t completely erased Patroclus and Achilles’ relationship. “Haha yeah these guys were totally bros” they say, even though I have read the Iliad and their relationship isn’t even subtle.

This book made me cry at least ten times. It’s just so beautifully written and has such a distinct vibe to it that whenever I crack it open for another time, it takes me straight back to the vacation that I read it on. (Needless to say, sobbing your eyes out can be less than helpful when you’re on the beach)

If you can only read one book on this list, it should be this one. I could talk all day about it and write novels on just how much of an incredible writer Madeline Miller is, but I feel like you’d get my drift a bit better if you actually read the book.

Goodreads Summary:

Greece in the age of heroes. Patroclus, an awkward young prince, has been exiled to the court of King Peleus and his perfect son Achilles. By all rights their paths should never cross, but Achilles takes the shamed prince as his friend, and as they grow into young men skilled in the arts of war and medicine their bond blossoms into something deeper - despite the displeasure of Achilles' mother Thetis, a cruel sea goddess. But then word comes that Helen of Sparta has been kidnapped. Torn between love and fear for his friend, Patroclus journeys with Achilles to Troy, little knowing that the years that follow will test everything they hold dear. Profoundly moving and breathtakingly original, this rendering of the epic Trojan War is a dazzling feat of the imagination, a devastating love story, and an almighty battle between gods and kings, peace and glory, immortal fame and the human heart.

Hope this list helps you through your coronacation, and please don’t be afraid to reblog or message me to tell me if you’ve read/will read any of these!

[bangtansdoc]

Into the light

Part 2.

Pairings:Park Jimin (BTS) x reader.

Genre: Fluff, horror, very confused Y/N, vampire!Au, CEO!Au

Warnings:Uh a really creepy scene with some disgusting stuff if you're easily triggered and easily scared, blood.

OST:Joy(red velvet)- OMG!(Ost of the Great seducer)

Synopsis:You need money. Park Jimin has money. You end up getting a job as a housekeeper in his gargantuan mansion. But what secrets might the handsome CEO be hiding under his flashy image?

A/N:Well, it's finally out. This update took a lot of prayer, meditation and formatting to get out. Like this is the third time I'm typing it to post. The forces of evil will not prevail. Anyway like I said this is going to be a long fic and I hope you all can follow through to the end. Enjoy!

❇️❇️❇️

Park Jimin.

He looked nothing like what you had seen of him. The pictures did him no justice at all. He was a hundred times more gorgeous in person.

You sat in your room after Park Jimin had told you to treat yourself to something warm and change your clothes.

You sat biting your fingernails and your thoughts wandered. You remembered his intense gaze on you while he wrapped his strong arms around you.

You remembered his soft eyes burning with curiosity as he had led you out of the pool.

You screamed in frustration.

How the hell were you supposed to focus on anything now?!

God.

You needed air.

You stood up and made your way to the window, before opening it wide. You breathed in the clean air and tried to clear your head. You glanced downstairs and your eyes caught the CEO moving quickly into one of the cars in his driveway and zooming out of the estate. He was leaving already? But he just got here. You took a deep breath and ran out of your room, bumping into Taehyung. "Y/N! What's the rush?" He asked, puzzled. "Uh the CEO, he's leaving already?" Taehyung looked understandably confused.

"I see you've met him."

He studied you, a suspicious look on his face. "He had an emergency."

You blinked, embarrassed.

"Oh."

God you felt stupid. What exactly were you rushing out to do? Kiss him goodbye? 'Pull yourself together Y/N.' You whispered to yourself.

"Are you okay?"

You looked up and met Taehyung's eyes. He had this look in them. A look you didn't understand. "Did something happen?" He asked again slowly, carefully choosing his words. You thought of telling him about the Incident in the pool and bit your lip. "I,uh,fell in the pool. And he rescued me." Taehyung's brows creased in worry. "It's a shallow pool." "I know, I just... panicked." There was an uncomfortable silence. "Is that all?" You met his eyes again. "Yeah." He smiled. "Okay." You turned to go but stopped, curiosity getting the better of you.

"CEO Park..." You began and Taehyung turned to you.

"Are you close to him?"

There was no expression on his face.

"I'm his PA."

"Does he come home often?" You continued without thinking. "It depends."

Shut up Y/N.

"Why does he live alone? Where is his family? I mean the rumors are that he has no family but this house is big enough for ten families so there must be some kind of explanation right?" Your brain screamed at you to shut the hell up but your mouth kept moving. Taehyung's face hardened, then he broke into a disturbing smile.

"You ask too many questions Y/N."

Your breath caught in your throat and you suddenly felt uncomfortable, and very, very afraid. You scampered back to the pool. Maybe Joon was right. Maybe the CEO was hiding something dangerous. You drained the water quietly, feeling as though someone was watching you. But each time you turned around, no one was there. You became sure that you wouldn't stay long in this house.

❇️❇️❇️

He watched her from the trees. She was dressed in black, but she shone brighter than the sun. Her eyes were as fierce as the blade on her dagger. It wasn't the first time he had watched her and it wouldn't be the last. She smiled triumphantly as she pounced on her kill and his heart lurched. He wasn't allowed to love her, but he already did. All he ever did was watch, too afraid to approach, too entranced to stay away. He was torn, so all he could do was watch.

❇️❇️❇️

The days passed by uneventfully, you hardly saw the CEO again, as he was barely ever around, and on the days you noticed his shoes at the doorway, you steered clear of him. Taehyung you saw everyday now, as he had made an annoying habit of getting in your way anytime you were working and watching you when he thought you weren't looking.

For Christ's sake.

You must have been really out of line that day to warrant this. Taehyung seemed kind enough, but then you didn't really know him. You were barely a month in an already fed up. School resumed(thankfully), a respite from your monotonous way of life. Namjoon brought life and light to your days but you always found yourself back in that mansion, bored and alone, with no one to relate to but Taehyung, who wasn't much company.

You sighed.

You would soon start naming your cleaning equipment.

You quickly finished your bagel and dusted your hands on your skirt. You stood up from the patio and walked into the living room. You plugged your iPod in , and put your earphones in your ears. You scrolled through your playlist and tapped on Somi's 'Birthday'. You fired up the vacuum cleaner and soon became lost in your own world.

"Oops, you're not invited!, yeah you're not invited!."

You sang along terribly, shaking your body to the tune and catchy beats. You turned the vacuum into your dance partner and imagined yourself on 'Dancing with the stars.' You breathed heavily, turned around and your soul almost left your body.

"Oh my God!!!" You yelled as you stumbled and fell backwards. You stared in shock at CEO Park, standing a few steps in front of you, who was also staring back.

What the hell?

How long had he been standing there?

He continued staring at you, this time however amusement mixed with the same curiosity that filled his eyes from your incident at the pool.

"Pre- president Park?" You stuttered, thoroughly confused as you stuggled to get back on your feet. He just stared at you silently, doing this for so long that you began to feel uncomfortable. Where was Taehyung when you needed him?

"Uh, I'm sor- sorry." You choked out again, unsure of what to say to the handsome man standing in front of you, who still hadn't said a word. He closed the gap between both of you, until his face was inches a way from your yours.

"Let me make something very clear miss Y/N." He said, his voice heavy in dialect. "This is not your house. It is a place of work. The next time you want to fool around, I suggest you take it outside." He said firmly and you gulped, unable to speak.

Where was the person that had rescued you in the pool? Surely it couldn't be the man standing in front of you.

"Do you understand?" He asked again.

"Y- yes sir."

He gave you one last stare, and you tried to read his expression. He didn't seem angry, just a little bit uncomfortable? He finally turned around and walked away. You let out a sigh you didn't know you had been holding. It felt as if someone had punched you in the gut. You didn't know what you had been expecting. A warm reception?

He was still the CEO after all, and you were his employee. Just because he had rescued you didn't mean that you two were close.

Then why were you feeling so disappointed?

You slowly tucked your earphones and iPod into your pocket, the air in the room feeling colder than the air outside.

****

"Hey there dork."

Joon smiled at your sleepy face from the phone screen, and you smiled back.

"Hi." You muttered drowsily. Namjoon's face twisted with worry. "Oh geez babe. You look awful."

"Thanks. I know."

You pulled your face with your palms.

"I'm exhausted."

Namjoon looked at you with pity. "You need to get out of that house." You laughed bitterly. "I don't really have a choice do I? I signed a contract." "Well they definitely knew what they were putting you up to." You scoffed and rubbed your left foot. "You know, living here would even be bearable if the CEO was.....I don't know....human? I mean he saved me alright, and.....I don't know. I wish he would give me something more,he's so stoic all the time,it's driving me crazy."

You sighed.

"I probably sound stupid don't I? Like I have no idea what I'm talking about." Namjoon raised an eyebrow in a smirk. "What? You can't expect me to flatter you right? You sound stupid all the time." You laughed. "God I love you so much, you idiot." "I love you too babe."

A sudden cry of anguish pierced through the air, forcing it's way into your room and into your ears. You dropped your phone in shock.

"Y/N? Y/N! What the hell was that?! Y/N!"

You picked up your phone shakily. "I -I-don't know."

The scream came again, a horrible shriek of agony similar to that of someone in unimaginable pain and torment.

"Oh my God! Namjoon what is happening?!" "Get up. Lock the doors! Whatever you do don't leave your room!" Your already panicked thoughts somehow drifted to the CEO. "But what about the CEO? He could be in danger! I have to go make sure he's okay!" "1st rule of horror movies Y/N! Don't leave your room when you hear a suspicious noise! Please just stay where you are! Forget about the CEO! You could get hurt!" "But I can't just stay here! I...." Your battery suddenly died.

"Joon? Namjoon? Namjoon!"

You gulped, forcing back tears as the horrible scream rang through the air again.

"Okay Y/N. Calm down. I- I have to get help first, have to call the police. CEO Park. I - I have to check if he's okay."

Whatever you do don't leave your room.

Namjoon's warning rang through your head as you pulled open your bedroom door and dashed out in a mad frenzy, running blindly up the stairs until you got to the CEO's bedroom. You ran towards it in Joy but stopped short as the scream rippled through the air again. Your heart stopped in your ribcage as you traced the sound in dread.....it was coming from the room. His room. You stepped forward numbly, blood pounding your head so loudly you almost couldn't hear your brain screaming at you to run and not look back.

The door was slightly ajar. You peered in and saw him, crouched on his bed,his hands matted wildly in his hair.

He was shirtless and you could see veins criss crossed on his back, with several wounds that were opening up again, and you grimaced in disgust.

He was rocking back and forth, groaning in pain and you gasped, making him stop.

His head turned to you slowly and his eyes met yours.

That person didn't look like park Jimin. That person didn't look like him at all. His eyes were blood red with a hunger so fierce it knocked you off your feet. You stumbled and landed on your bottom, about to scream when a pair of arms grabbed you, lifting you up and covering your mouth to stifle your scream.

"Get back inside your room. NOW."

Taehyung was holding a vial with a dark red substance inside.

You stammered incoherently, fear numbing your brain and tears rolling down your cheeks. Taehyung gripped you firmly, jolting you back to your senses.

"Please Y/N you have to trust me. Go back to your room and lock the doors. Go! Now!" Taehyung pushed you towards the stairs. "Go!"

You turned and ran, running as fast as your legs could carry you, not stopping until you reached your bedroom, and then bolting the door, propping chairs up against it. The scream rang through again, and you covered your ears and curled on the bed, futiley trying to block it out,while shinning brightly in the sky, was a blood red moon.

You woke up the next day to a peaceful morning. The sun was shining brightly and the birds sang happily, as if nothing had happened the night before. You as well almost began to think that you had just had some crazy dream, until you saw the chairs propped up against your bedroom door and your heart sank.

You hadn't been dreaming.

You carefully opened your room door, stepping outside slowly. Everything looked so normal. You felt sick.

You ran down the stairs and towards the front door and saw Taehyung talking to someone behind the door. His gaze fell on you.

"Ah, here she is officer. Come here Y/N."

You shuffled your feet to his side and came face to face with a police officer. "Safe and sound. Just as I said."

The officer looked you over gently, his stare boring into you and you averted your eyes to his name tag. Min Yoongi.

"Are you really okay miss? You know that if there's something wrong you can tell me." You gulped, your throat suddenly dry and using every ounce of will power left in you to force the lies out of your mouth. "N- nothing's wrong officer. Everything's fine." He smiled at you. "Your friend sent us over. Sounded really freaked out on the phone. We were here last night and tried the door bell, but no one answered, so we decided to come back in the morning. I'll be sure to let him know that you're alright. Sir. Ma'am." He said as he tipped his cap and walked away. You turned and began to walk away too but Taehyung's voice stopped you.

"Y/N. We need to talk." He said as he made his way past you and into the parlour. You followed and sat opposite him.

You stared at your knees, avoiding Taehyung's eyes.

"Are you okay?"

You didn't reply.

"Well, I guess I deserve that."

Silence.

He cleared his throat.

"About yesterday, you were really startled right? I'm sorry you had to see that. The CEO has a heart condition you see, and yesterday he forgot to take his meds so...."

Anger welled up in you. You had been scared senseless yester night and you were pretty sure that what you had seen was not normal, yet Taehyung had the guts to sit there and lie? Did they think you were a fool?

"Really? A heart condition? That's what you're going with? I thought you'd be smarter than that Taehyung."

You stood up.

"Where the hell is the CEO? Shouldn't he at least be here to clarify or explain things to me? I guess even in this situation he still sends his lackey to cover up!" Taehyung remained quiet but you saw a pained expression flicker across his face.

"I know what I saw. There was someone.... something in the CEO's room. Something happened last night! Don't try to make me look crazy! And what about what you said Hun? You practically begged me to get back in my room and lock the doors. How do you explain that?!" "What do you think happened?" Taehyung asked quietly. "You tell me! And stop answering me like some God forsaken lawyer!" You yelled harshly.

"Y/N. You are understandably upset. I get it. But I assure you..." "Where the hell is he?!" You raved, stomping out of the room. Taehyung grabbed you roughly.

"Let me go! Let me go you son of a...." "Trust me Y/N. It will be much better for both of us if you just let this go." He said through gritted teeth, his voice coming out in a pained whisper. He let go of your hand.

"What the hell is going on here? What are you so afraid of?" You asked, your voice quivering.

"The CEO has a heart condition. He forgot to take his meds. That's what you saw yesterday. Nothing more." He said and walked out of the room.

You slumped into the couch, defeated. You glanced at the calendar. Just two more weeks till the month was up.

Fine. You'd play their game. Just two more weeks and you were out of there.

❇️❇️❇️

You lay sprawled on Namjoon's bed while he fumed beside you.

"I can't believe you're still going back to work there. You must be crazier than I thought." You sighed.

"I am. For the umpteenth time Joon, I signed a contract. I can't bail till the month is up." Namjoon scoffed. "But you could be in danger. You promised me you'd quit once something felt off. And what happened was off raised to the power of a hundred." You chuckled. "Hey can I borrow your laptop?" Namjoon handed it over to you. "Thanks." You said as you googled park Jimin.

"Trying to get to the root of things hun?" "I don't even know. I need some kind of explanation. Taehyung said to let it go. But I just can't." "Yeah well this Tae whatever character is making a lot of sense to me. Just do your job and shove your resignation letter up the CEO's butt crack once the month is up."

You scrolled through through the page. "Hmm. Nothing in here about him having a heart condition. Not that I believed that anyway."

You closed the laptop and fell back on the bed. "Let me just crash here till Monday morning." "Make yourself comfortable."

You slapped your forehead.

"Right. I still have to finish my project. And my laptop's in the house of horrors." "You can borrow mine." "Nope. I left my flash there too. Let me quickly run back to get it. Geez. Park Jimin is turning me into a scatterbrain."

You grabbed your coat and dashed out of the room. "Be back in a minute." "Be careful!" Namjoon shouted after you.

By the time you arrived at the mansion, it was already dark. You let yourself in, but stopped short when you came face to face with CEO Park. Your first instincts were to take off, but you held your ground. "I,uh, forgot something." You murmured quietly and began to walk past him.

"Y/N?"

You stopped abruptly, wondering where the sound had come from.

"I actually need you to uh, do something for me."

"Today's my day off."

"I know, I just.... forgot something at my office. It's not really that far from here. I need you to run down and get it. I have something really important to take care of now."

You stared at his face, completely confused at his change in attitude. However, you felt a part of your insides(the part no one ever wants to talk about and always pretends like it doesn't exist when in reality that part is the real controller of everything)warm at his new persona.

"Uh, sure,sure. Right."

The ghost of a smile formed on his face as he whipped out his phone and texted you the address. You sighed and made your way to the from door.

The person that had saved you at the pool had suddenly miraculously resurfaced after two weeks of torture on your part. His warm eyes and that soft and gentle way with which he had addressed you forced a blush to creep up your cheeks.

The image of the man with blood red eyes flashed through your mind, and you shuddered, suddenly wondering if you were going crazy.

You found the company quickly, with the files exactly where he had said they would be. Security had let you in pretty easily and you wondered why. You grabbed them and made your way to the main road when you spotted a group of drunk things standing along your path.

You groaned.

It wasn't safe to pass by them this late in the night, so you decided to wait for them to move along. You hid in an alley way and waited...and waited...but it seemed like they had no intention of leaving.

Oh no.

You couldn't sleep here.

You didn't know this area. You began to panic. What if they didn't leave? What if they found you hiding? You grabbed your phone, hesitating, before dialling CEO Park's number. The line trilled for a whole before he picked. You heard his soft voice on the other side.

"Hello?"

"Pre - President Park? I - I'm stuck here! There's some thugs right on the path outside of your office and I'm too scared to pass by them! You have to come get me!" "Come get you? Just find some other way out of there or wait for them to leave. Why on Earth would I come get you?!" "Because one, you sent me out on my day off, two, I don't know any other way out of here, and three,if I get hurt it's your responsibility!!! I'll sue you for everything you're worth! I'm hiding in the back alley way. Come get me now!" You whispered furiously before hanging up and praying silently.

You waited in silence for what seemed like hours before your ears perked up at the sound of voices. The thugs were heading right in your direction. You heaved and gasped, grabbing a rusty bolt from the trash and arming yourself. You suddenly felt an arm grab your shoulder.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!"

You screamed and swung, before twisting your ankle and falling backwards on your bottom.

"Are you trying to take my head off?!"

CEO Park stood above you, his eyes betraying his concern. So far most of your meetings with him involved you landing on your butt.

"You - you came. You actually came."

He shrugged, not meeting your eyes. "So you were bluffing the whole time on the phone?" "I had to say something, but I still didn't expect you to fall for it." You tried to stand to your feet, putting pressure on your left ankle and then yelping in pain.

"Can you walk?"

"M - maybe. Did you bring your car?" He stared at you, amused at how freely you were conversing with him. You'd be Happy to tell him you were as confused as he was.

"I did, but it's a long walk to the parking lot. Are you sure you can make it?" "Well what are you gonna do, carry me?" CEO Park looked... flustered? At your response. Your eyes must have been playing tricks on you.

"No that wouldn't be convenient I guess." He said after clearing his throat.

"Come with me."

You limped beside him as the two of you made your way to the parking lot. You took your time to study him closely. You had no idea what could have happened to have made Park Jimin seem a lot different than what you knew of him - at least what you thought you knew. You tried to picture the person you had seen that night, but the image had been replaced by that of the flustered Park Jimin, and the Park Jimin that had tried to hide his concern for you with irritation.

You are so weak Y/N!

You decided not to get your hopes, after all he had surprised you before. He turned and caught you staring at him. You averted your eyes quickly, biting back a blush.

You heard him sigh beside you and he crouched down. You stared at him, confused, although being confused was not a new thing anymore. You welcomed the feeling with nostalgia. "What are you doing....sir?" "Get on my back." What? "I don't under..." "We are still a few metres away from the parking lot, and you are already staring at me like you are probably going to blame me if your injury gets worse, so hop on." He looked up at you and for some reason you ran out of breath....and brain juice.

"Get on already."

You slowly obliged him and got on his back, awkwardly holding on to his shoulders. He stood and jerked you up suddenly, forcing you to wrap your arms around his chest.

"Are you comfortable?"

You barely choked out an answer.

You were very much not comfortable! Your boss was giving you a piggyback ride for heaven's sake, the same boss who had been cold to literally everyone not too long ago. The whole scenario was too strange and foreign to you.

But the most annoying and confusing part however, was how fast your heart was beating and the blush that had crept up your cheeks.

You unconsciously squeezed your arms around him tighter and you felt his shoulders tense. You then heard him scoff.

"I think you're enjoying this way too much Y/N." You didn't know if it was humanly possible to blush harder than you already had, and you couldn't help the smile that formed on your lips.

****

You both sat quietly in the car as CEO Park drove back to the mansion. The atmosphere was awkward and you chewed your lip, desperately looking for something to do. Namjoon had already blasted your phone with panicked calls and you had to reassure him that you were okay. The CEO cleared his throat and spoke up.

"Taehyung told me you were quite upset."

You turned to face him, alarmed, and he glanced at you.

"What's with that look on your face? I'm not about to fire you." You blinked, remaining quiet.

"I just want you to know that whatever it is you might not understand now is for your own good. If you feel like Taehyung or I are keeping secrets from you, you are absolutely right."

Well, at least he was being honest.

"Don't expect any of these secrets to be revealed to you. Trust me when I say that I'm not about to make the same mistake twice.

Trust me. Those words have been going around a lot lately. Ah. So that's what it was. He was being nice because he wanted to pacify you.

You had never understood when people said that their hearts shattered into a million pieces, but the feeling was clear now. You had told yourself not to get your hopes up hadn't you? But how do you not get your hopes up when you have a crush on someone? It's impossible.

"With all due respect President Park, I think keeping me in the dark is a very silly move. You say it's for my own good, but knowledge is power. I can take better care of myself if I know what I'm up against."

CEO Park glanced at you again, an amused look on his face. "Well I can't force you to understand. You have the right to your own opinion." He was totally stonewalling you.

You folded your arms stubbornly.

"I can't work in an environment where I'm probably not safe. Mind you I haven't forgotten about that night. And frankly I don't feel safe in that house anymore."

There was an unreadable expression on the CEO's face. "You're free to resign then. I won't stop you. I believe you were paid a months wages in advance right? When the month is up I'll release you from your contract. Then you can leave." His words hit you like bolts of lightning. He literally just told you that he wasn't going to stop you if you tried to leave.

He pulled up in the driveway and moved to open the door for you put you pushed it open rudely, desperately forcing tears back into your tear ducts. "I can do it myself." You stood to your feet, careful not to put any pressure on your strained ankle.

"You have every right to be angry Y/N. But you're better off letting your curiosity go. There are some things that aren't meant to be discovered." You huffed angrily.

"So what happens now? You really are some kind of diplomat Mr CEO. Acting all warm and kind when you want something. You'll probably go right back to behaving like I don't exist by tomorrow morning."

He just stared at you, his expression softened. "I'm sorry if you feel that way." You scoffed again as you limped your way into the mansion, letting the tears flow freely. You would take him up on his offer.

The minute the month was up, you were kissing this job, this house, and this CEO goodbye.

*****

Part 3 will be out soon! Hopefully!

Comments would be appreciated!!!

[spnfanficpond]

Survey results and responses

A couple of weeks ago, we put out a survey to get a feel for some things, and we got over a dozen responses! Thanks to everyone who responded and told us what you’re looking for! 

There were some responses that we would like to get some clarification on, and some responses that requested things we’ve already got out there. Below the cut is a rundown of some of the questions and responses, along with links to things that already exist and plans to enact some of the things you’ve suggested. 

If you responded to the survey, please read below! We need your input!

1. What things related to posting your works on Tumblr or other sites would you like to learn more about? For example, Keep Reading cuts, finding gifs, giving credit to gif and edit creators, etc.

A tutorial for adding Keep Reading to fics, both on a computer and on the app, would be helpful.

How far down should I put a keep reading?

Anything related to gifs

Best apps or sites to use for making gifs.

Finding gifs and giving credit to creators

when should I give someone credit for being a beta (for example: I bounced ideas with someone for a minute or two but they didn't technically beta read it; I can't decide between X and Y (with no context), pick one)

linking posts to blog bios

The facts on the search issues (re: links, tags, and anything else that keeps a fic from being "searchable") - I see people saying various things, so sourced facts would be nice, if possible

These are great requests, and we’ll do our best to address them in the next LiveChat Event!! There were some requests that we’ve already addressed, so here’s some links to those:

What should I be including for reader info, eg: Warnings? Word Count? Summary? Characters...? - Suggested Format for Fics

Feedback - December 2018 LiveChat Recap (Feedback and Beta Reading)

Building an audience/gaining exposure - November 2018 LiveChat Recap (Reader involvement)

There was one request for “troubleshooting”, but we’re not sure exactly what’s meant by that, so if you requested this, please send us an ask or an IM and clarify what kind of troubleshooting you’re curious about!

2.  What tags would you like to see our "#writer resources" tag broken down into? For example, grammar, publishing, etc. (Currently, we only have a couple of tags that are used consistently to tag posts that are reblogged from other blogs, like writing prompts and reference posts we think might be useful for our members. We would like to make finding information easier by refining our tags so posts about grammar aren't mixed in with posts about publishing, for example.) Please list below any tags that you think would be helpful for us to use to make these posts easier to find when you're looking for them.

Word choice/vocabulary

Grammar

Synonyms

Spelling

Punctuation

Editing

Tutorials

Challenges

Tips

Inspiration

Publishing

Plot

Characterization/character development

World building

Genre tags like romance, action, horror, etc.

Dialogue

All of these are great! We’ve got some questions about some of the others that were suggested, though. If you can send us an ask or an IM and clarify about these, we’d love to hear from you!

Writing Prompts - This tag is already in use. 

How to format - How to format what? Need some clarification on this.

Getting started - With what? Is this like inspiration or something different?

Brainstorming - What kinds of posts would be under this tag?

Comments - What kinds of posts would be under this tag?

Awards - We already have a tag for the AFA’s, so is this for something different?

We’d love your feedback on these ones we’re unsure of, so let us know!

3.  Is there anything you wish was easier to find on the blog?

Maybe a list of frequently used tags on the FAQ page so I'm not blindly trying tags when I try to search for something.

Once we get a set list of tags we’ll be using, there will be a post or page listing them with links. First step is setting up the list, which is why we asked question #2. We’re on the right track!

New pond member stories. 

By stories, do you mean fics they’ve written, or info about who they are? We post a list of new Pond members with links to their work every month. You can check them out here. If this isn’t what you’re looking for, please send us an ask with some examples!

The submit box!

Are you on desktop, mobile, or the app? Please send an IM to @mrswhozeewhatsis or @manawhaat about this so we can help you and figure out why it’s not easily accessible for you!

I wish ships and pairings were tagged so I can easily filter and find fics submitted to the pond.

This is something we’ve considered, but it’s been on the back burner while we focus on other issues. Someday, we would like to be a blog for readers, not just writers, and instituting a tagging system for fics would be part of that. Setting that up, though, will be a big project, since there are so many ships and tags to consider. How to do it without making the submit page four miles long with tag options is another hurdle. This is on our radar, but it might be a while.

I wish some things like pond members, tag list, and writing resources were easier to find on mobile./ Links are difficult to find on mobile.

The problem with the member lists is that they are pages, not posts, because pages are easier to manage than posts. Posts are slippery things that can be lost if we’re not careful, whereas pages are rooted in the blog where we can’t lose them. Sadly, the app can’t read pages, for some reason.

Another problem is that the app can’t handle a navigation block. Short of filling the bio with a ton of links, which gets very messy and hard to read, there’s no way to make these links available on the app.

That being said, if you access Tumblr via a browser app like Chrome on your phone, all of these links are available at the top of the blog! Not only are they available, the member rolls and everything you can’t see on the app are completely accessible!

Mobile friendly versions of beta and tag lists? The spreadsheets are awesome, but a little hard to read.

Spreadsheets are the only way we know to allow users to filter, which is a major part of the functionality of both lists.  If you’ve got suggestions for how to do this, we’re open to them!

4.  Is there anything you'd like to see more or less of on the blog?

More thesaurus/synonym like posts. For those that struggle to use other words for_____ and want to.

Interesting! We don’t see many posts like that out there, so this might be content we’d have to create. Perhaps we could solicit words from our members and create posts like this based on those suggestions? What do you think?

I think it would be good to expand the tags for submissions to include more info, like more specific other trigger categories, things that are typically taboo that a reader should know about, if the story is smut/angst/fluff, etc.

This was mentioned and addressed above, so we won’t repeat it all here.

I'd like to see more writing prompts.

More than just what’s in the #writing prompt tag? We’ll need more clarification on this one!

More things about the community like fic recs, nominations, maybe get-to-know pond member posts.

Since we’ve already got the Angel Fish Awards and the monthly New Members posts, which both include fic recs, we’ll need some clarification on what you’re looking for there. As for posts about getting to know individual pond members, this sounds like a great idea! We’re open to suggestions on how to choose what members get chosen!! Send us an ask with your ideas!!

I wish there were more active big fish in the pond.

Being a Big Fish is a big responsibility, and we understand that not everyone is up to it. We ask that our Big Fish be consistently kind and generous with other members, spend some time every month in the chat room so Guppies and Jellies can ask them for help, signal boost posts when asked, assist with Pond projects when requested, be involved with the Angel Fish Awards, and like/reblog fics by other Pond members. Doing all of that AND having a life outside of Tumblr can be a lot. 

Because of all of that, we don’t usually approach Jellies and ask them if they’d be interested. We wait for Jellies to come to us. It’s a big thing, and we don’t want to pressure folks. If someone is interested, they should read this post about how Big Fish are chosen, and let us know that they are interested!

5. What kinds of prizes would you like to see more of in the monthly Angel Fish raffle?

Not sure what's currently being given away.

It changes slightly every month, and we make a post with the list of prizes. The post for June hasn’t gone up, yet, so keep an eye out on the blog!

I think it would be fun to incorporate Pond members that create stuff (like that have etsy shops or stuff like that) into the raffle.

If members would like to donate things from their shops as prizes, we would welcome them! 

Hmm maybe a fic commission from a big fish? (If they’re open. Or anyone the winner might want to commission, not just big fish. Also specifically one where the writer’d still get paid in lieu of buying another physical prize lol.)

This is an interesting idea, and we’re considering it from a few different angles!

6. Are there any topics you would like to see discussed in the monthly LiveChat events?

There was only one response to this one that we need some clarification on: 

Outlining series, how to give feedback, how to make your fanfics flow

We talked about Planning vs. Pantsing back in March, so check that out, and if it doesn’t give you what you’re looking for about outlining, let us know! As for feedback, we talked about Feedback and Beta Reading in December. Your last suggestion sounds interesting, but we need maybe an example of what you’re talking about to be sure we know what you’re looking for. Send us an ask and tell us more about your flow questions!

7. Is there anything else you'd like to tell us? Suggestions for improvement? Let us know here!

I love the Pond and I love the community that has been built from SPN. I feel like Big Fish are active (which they should be) and then a handful of people (category unknown, but I suspect they are Guppies) seem to be kind of active, but based on the descriptions Jellyfish seem like they should have a role as well. Could we do something with Live Chat where a Jellyfish helps answer questions or host with a BF maybe? JF should be approachable too but if we don't know them then it's hard to ask them anything and they seem just as intimidating as a BF. (BF are less intimidating to me because they interact with everyone more often actually). *shrugs* I don't know, maybe that's just me.

This is a tough one. Jelly Fish are basically Big Fish without the responsibility. (See above about Big Fish and our expectations of them.) We’ve focused on Big Fish with the LiveChats, but we aren’t against the idea of having Jelly Fish chat with us, too. (In fact, three of our events have featured Jellies.) This will take some thought to find ways to encourage Jelly Fish interaction. All suggestions are welcome!

I feel like a quarterly raffle would give more people time to vote/enter. Doing it every month feels a bit over saturated. Unrelated, but a Discord server would be nice. In my experience, those feel more open to community than a Skype chat bc there are different chats that people can interact in and it’s easier to moderate.

A quarterly raffle is totally doable, though the AFA’s will remain monthly. Would that still sound good?

Michelle has had learning Discord and setting up a server as the next thing on her to do list for three months, but just hasn’t had the time to sit down and learn (you know, when normal people are available to teach her, not the crazy hours she keeps). Kale is on Discord for other things, but is also just a beginner. We’re working on it! Discord is coming!!

If answering questions from surveys or comments or submissions in the live chat (or even interesting questions) could you post the question and answer on the blog for those that miss the chat and don’t want to/can’t scroll through it all to read everything.

You mean like the Recaps to the Monthly LiveChat Events?

I think it's great you put out these surveys. Maybe a designated suggestion option? You have the list for betas, how about a list of those that create aesthetics or art for fics?

These are awesome ideas!! Putting them on the to-do list!!

I think the Pond is really good, I just wish I knew/interacted with more people who are in it.

Tell us what would better enable you to interact, and we’ll see what we can do!

I'd suggest something to motivate people to take the time to submit to the pond? I feel like nobody hardly does it anymore, including myself, because it feels like nobody really interacts through the pond anymore.

The admins have discussed some ideas about this, but haven’t found a solution they can all agree on, yet. One admin suggested limiting Angel Fish nominations to fics that were submitted to the blog. Don’t submit, you can’t be nominated. One of the other admins hated the idea, and the third abstained. The only other suggestion has been to increase readers of the blog so writers have more incentive to submit to reach a larger audience. As mentioned above, we’re working on ideas towards that goal. What suggestions might you guys have? Another raffle for prizes? 

Just maybe add a few more big fish? If that's possible? Maybe more interaction with everyone to make them feel like a part of the pond. 

See above about adding more Big Fish. We need volunteers who are willing and able to keep up! Beyond trying to keep the chat room active, we could use some suggestions about how to increase interaction! Give us your ideas!!

That’s a lot to read, and kudos to you if you made it this far!! Thanks to everyone who responded to the survey, and we look forward to hearing more from you all!!

[peepingtoad]

Anonymous Fanmail // always accepting

Good evening (or day) to you anon! Let me say first off how touching it was to see this message pop up earlier on! I know my activity has been spotty as hell lately, with inspiration being flaky and my attention span even more so--so it really is encouraging to hear that the little I've managed to do in the past couple of months is still well received.

From reading your message it seems like you have a great handle on writing and vocabulary, but I also know that English really can be a bastard of a language whenever it deviates from the standard. So I can only commend your commitment to gaining even more understanding.

So to answer your question, under the cut are some of the authors/works that have influenced me most. I’ve not really had a chance to make my way through my huge reading list, or read much for a couple years now, so I’ll just mention some of the ones that really stuck in my mind:

Darren Shan 

I really must start with Darren Shan, because for a teen author his descriptions of monsters and violence still are some of the most viscerally gross and visual I've ever read. So you can imagine what it was like reading him as a 9/10 year old! I don't get to show it very often on Jiraiya, but I really do love to write a bit of nasty gore where I can. This probably shows more when I'm writing certain toad stomach themed jutsu scenes... but yeah. This author really inspired me as a kid, and fantasy-horror for young adults is still a genre I'd love to write one day (if I ever come up with a solid original idea, that is)! Which leads me on to--

Stephen King

Who, honestly, I haven't really kept up to date with. The novels I read by him were his classics: Carrie, Misery, Pet Sematary... which I think were all written before I was born, now that I think about it. I know he can be a little long-winded for some, but I really appreciate how he builds up tension and works with multiple threads at a time. His are some of the few books that actually made me scared in my teens, his psychological horror is great, and he doesn’t shy away from a sex scene, even if they’re usually horrible. I always love an author who goes into nitty-gritty, not necessarily pleasant detail.

J.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R. Tolkien

A predictable one, I'm sure! But I've definitely drawn influence from the sheer world-building of Middle Earth, which has inspired worlds for my own OCs, but in regards to fandom has made me want to delve a little deeper into areas the canon leaves unexplained (it really is my goal to one day fill in all the blanks in Jiraiya's life, working with what little we were given and the messy timeline). And while Tolkien's characters can be a little wooden and overly functional at times, the true joy I find in his works is the sprawling descriptions of nature and the world, and how well-linked all of the characters/figures of the past are to each other. Also I feel it's an unpopular opinion, but I absolutely adore the songs/poems. Every one of them. Especially 'The Ent and the Entwife'.

Richard Adams

Most known for Watership Down, and his style again contains lots of beautiful nature imagery (with a very strong environmentalist lean). It's a pretty traumatic story, as anyone who has seen the animated film from the late 70's will recall, but what the book offers on top of that is a whole mythology that the animals believe in, world-building, animal characters that are both intelligent and believably still animals, gorgeous descriptions of the English countryside... yeah. It's one of my all time favourites! I’ve yet to bring myself to read The Plague Dogs, however, because I know it will upset me a whole lot.

Whoever the hell wrote 'The Soddit' and 'Bored of the Rings'

Yes, seriously. I'm a sucker for a good spoof, and these made me laugh out loud. I recall many terrible euphemisms. Not to be read with a critical mind whatsoever :’) they are kinda trash, but I really enjoy content that doesn’t take itself very seriously.

Terry Pratchett

Count this as a relatively new inspiration--I'm an absolute newbie when it comes to Pratchett, if I'm honest, which is ridiculous because it’s right up my alley. I’ve only fully read Good Omens (with Neil Gaiman), read halfway through a few of the standalone Discworlds, and watched several of the animated and BBC series adaptations, but I’m definitely inspired. It's just really daunting to know where to start with the main body of Discworld in particular. But I think after spending my childhood enjoying comedic fantasy in general (I also thank the Fable trilogy of games for that), it was only natural that I found his tongue-in-cheek, conversational to the point of being mundane, playing with tropes style a perfect fit for me. All of that, with some pretty immense world-building in too! It’s great to see such a loved world that is written in such a light, funny way (from what I’ve read), especially since I do my best to let humour inject itself into my writing wherever possible.

Oscar Wilde

And more specifically, The Picture of Dorian Gray. This is just peak gothic sexy decadence, I assure you. And it's one of my all time favourites... again, for gorgeous descriptions, but it's more sensory than physical. And of course, high-key gay subtext. And did I mention it's sexy? Not in the obvious way, just in a 'this level of indulgent description of luxuries and hedonism is downright slutty' kind of way. If you want obvious sexy though, definitely check out the film starring Ben Barnes too!

Anaïs Nin

Ok look, so in answer to one of your other questions, I do indeed read fanfic. Not as much now as I used to or would like to, but I certainly do. And Anaïs Nin is one of the few well known erotic writers I’ve read that I think is better than the best fanfiction stuff I’ve read. Because honestly, lots of them are dudes (sorry Jiraiya) and it’s just... nah. I’ve always thought that the erotic writing in decent fanfic tended to be high tier for somebody not paid to do it. Anyway, when it comes to Nin the writing is beautifully sensual, but I’ll warn you for questionable content at times--and I mean triggering content. I think that a lot of her erotic short stories were commissioned by others, so I don’t judge her, but there is also a lot of symbolism within the taboo so... that’s my warning about that.

John Keats

Time for a poet, and one of my favourites is this guy. Pretty much covering the Romantic/Gothic cusp, all the poems I remember reading by him were long, indulgent, sensual and low-key filthy. I can’t really say much other than read Keats! ‘Isabella, or the Pot of Basil’ is a favourite!

Seamus Heaney

My favourites are ‘Death Of a Naturalist’ and ‘Blackberry-Picking’. Get that gross, kinda visceral nature imagery. Nice.

Wilfred Owen

Mostly studied him in college, which I enjoyed a lot, but I ended up revisiting his war poetry when I started writing Jiraiya. Something about the way he questions patriotism and feels for the ‘enemy’ related a lot to him for me, and the poems themselves are so tragic they really spark up your empathy.

... As for songwriters? Hmm. Lyrically, I always enjoy pretty gloomy stuff. Nick Cave, The Cure, Placebo, Depeche Mode. A lot of it very spooky and sad-romantic. I definitely have a type :’) a definite favourite is also Björk, both for her surreal lyrics, and the crazy stuff she can do with her voice also helps!

I’m honestly struggling to think of more off the top of my head, because I know I have read and enjoyed more books/poetry than this. Sadly I’ve been too preoccupied with other things to branch out into more world literature, but it’s something I want to make an effort to do--especially Chinese and Japanese literature, some of which are on my current book pile. But these are some of the few that came straight to mind for me, and are probably my biggest influences. Hope you enjoyed my lengthy rambling nonetheless. And again, thank you so much for your kind message! It really lifted my spirits <3

[critical-analysis]

Consent in TTRPGs: How to Implement It in Your Game

I wrote a few weeks ago (maybe longer) about why consent in TTRPGs is important and why GMs who are against it are going against the very spirit of role playing games. I thought that this week I'd write something up about how to go about gaining and giving consent, from both a GM and a player perspective.

Here's my previous essay about this topic. If you're not sure what I mean when I'm talking about consent in regards to TTRPGs, go ahead and read that one first.

I'll start with the GM side of things. Making sure you know that your players are completely aware of what they're in for and what kind of game they're going to be playing is important. Even before we get to the point of consent in the way it's been discussed lately, just making sure that your game is the kind of game they want to play is important in making sure they, and everyone else is going to have as much fun as possible. One player not enjoying themselves can really drag a group down and ruin the enjoyment for everybody. So make sure that your players, whether it's an entire group starting a whole new campaign, or an individual player coming into an already running game, know the kind of game you're running. Some people don't like heavy role play. Some people don't like more battle based games. Some people don't like horror. Some people don't like modern settings. Make sure everyone playing knows exactly which game/system you're using, what the genre will be, how RP heavy it will be, how "hack 'n' slash" heavy it will be, etc.

You also need to make sure you and all of your players can agree to a general schedule. Not necessarily down to planning the exact dates ahead of time, but coming to a general agreement about how often you'll play (will you play every week? More than once a week? A couple of times a month?) will help people know if this is a game they can fit into their schedule. Someone with a lot of responsibilities might not be able to play more than once a week, or even every week. Making sure you get schedule stuff cleared up ahead of time can be a big help in ensuring the longevity of your campaign because it will minimize the chances of schedules not matching up and people getting frustrated about not being able to schedule a game.

Those are all just general things that aren't even necessarily "consent", but they're important things GMs should be doing, and they do set the precedent for gaining consent from your players, because it shows them early on that you care about what they need and what matters to them. It will likely make players who do need concessions when it comes to certain things feel more comfortable in letting you know.

Now, lets get into the actual matter of consent. There are different ways to start the conversation, but there should ALWAYS be a conversation.

DO NOT just sit around the table with the whole group and say "does anyone have anything they need to let me know about before we start so that I know what things to avoid?" For one thing, your players might not entirely know what you're talking about. There are players, especially newer ones, who don't really think about the fact that a role playing game could be triggering to them, so they wouldn't even know to ask. There's also the matter of privacy, and players who do need these concessions might not want the other players to know about their traumas and experiences that have led them to need these concessions.

It's just a good idea, even if we were ignoring the need for consent, to have a one-on-one with each of your players before the first session. It will help them feel more comfortable with as GM, it gives you the opportunity to talk about things like what kind of game they're most interested in playing, and you'll have the chance to talk to them about their character, get ideas about how you can fit that character into the world, and help them out with any character building problems they might be having. So you should already be having a private conversation with each player anyway. This is where you start talking about consent.

Some people use consent forms that their players can fill out. If you look around online you can find a few different versions available that have been made by GMs that you can download. Monte Cook Games has one that you can download from their store for free. 

These forms can be very helpful, but they should not be the end of it. You still need to have a conversation with them. Most forms don't allow for much detail that can be incredibly crucial for you to know exactly what you need to avoid and how to craft your story. However, be sensitive to the fact that some people struggle when it comes to talking about their traumas/phobias/etc., and that some people CAN'T. Don't make them. Don't say anything like "well if you won't tell me how do I know exactly what I can use and how can make a story?" And certainly don't threaten them with something like "if you won't talk more about it then I might end up putting something in my story that triggers you without knowing and then I won't be able to do anything about it."

To start with, if you don't need any clarifications at that time, then you don't need to ask about them. But let them know that you obviously don't have the entire campaign completely planned, so their consent/consent form will remain relevant throughout the entire campaign as you plan. If you need clarifications now, ask if that's okay. If you don't, ask if it's okay for you to ask for clarifications in the future as you're planning. Be flexible with how the clarification discussion happens. Present different ways to go about it than them just opening up about their traumas and phobias. Offer "yes or no" questions as a possibility. Tell them that they don't have to explain their experiences or phobia to you, that they can just answer your questions and if a question is too much they can just say "pass".

But be prepared for the possibility that they won't want to talk about it at all. This can be difficult, but it doesn't have to be a roadblock. It's important that you let them know that without clarification you might come up on something in the story that triggers them without realizing it WITHOUT making it sound like a threat or like you're blaming them. Make sure they know that it's important to you that you don't do anything in the storytelling that upset or triggers them, so that you two need to be able to establish some kind of signal in case you do start to come up on something like that, a signal that lets you know you need to bail out.

If they are willing to discuss it, then that's great! But it's still important to remember not to push and to be aware of their body language and behavior to make sure they're not getting to uncomfortable. If you sense they are getting uncomfortable, pull it back. Let them know it's okay if they don't want to discuss it anymore. Let them know that there are ways you can work around it if they don't want to elaborate.

But if they are open to the discussion, the first thing to focus on is what you need to do to make them comfortable and to make sure they feel safe. A lot of it is going to be clarifying whether what they've checked/listed applies just to them or to other characters (PCs and NPCs alike). Make notes on EVERYTHING so that you don't forget a single thing. Some things are going to be about clarifying the levels as to which something is excluded. If they check/list "sex", clarifying whether that means graphic depictions or any mention of it is important, as it clarifying if it applies only to their character or to other characters as well. If someone lists "car accidents", you'll want to clarify if mentioning them at all is a problem, or if it's okay as long as there are no graphic descriptions.

Never, ever, ever, EVER ask them to explain why they listed/checked a certain thing. NEVER ask them to describe their experience. NEVER make them feel like they have to in order for you to agree to what they're asking. They do NOT have to explain themselves. If they want to share, they will. Do not make them feel like they have to.

Figuring out how all of the players, each person's consent, and what everyone wants out of a game can be where it gets tricky, because you might end up in a place where one players wants and needs are in conflict with another player's wants and needs. And that can be tough to navigate.

Now, some of it can be easy. If someone is of the mindset that they need graphic descriptions of blood and gore in order for a game to be fun... quite frankly that's ridiculous. Graphic depictions of blood and gore are not things that play a major role in storytelling and characterization/development. Now, they might be important things if you're playing a certain kind of horror game, but that's something that should be covered in that first discussion before you even get to the consent conversation. If someone says they need graphic descriptions of blood and gore, or that they need graphic descriptions of murder, or that they need eyeball trauma in order for the game to be fun for them, that is unreasonable.

But when it comes to things that have to do with the way the other players write their characters and their backstories, the way they develop those characters, etc.... it can get a little trickier. Because for a lot of players role playing in these games is very personal, and they put a lot of themselves in those characters. They use their characters to work out their own personal struggles. There are things they can pursue in the game that can be empowering for them, or that can be important wish fulfillment. So if you have players with character aspects that might clash with what a person has listed on their consent form, then there could be a problem. These problems usually come in two forms: conflicting with something in a player's/multiple players' backstory, and prohibiting from everyone else in the game from doing a certain thing for the entire game.

You should be familiar with at least the generalities of all of your players characters and backstories before you have the consent discussions so that you know if something on someone's consent list clashes with someone's character. Here are just a few ways this could happen:

A player lists "homophobia" on their consent list, one of the player's backstories has to do with escaping the homophobia of their family/hometown

A player lists "sexual assault" on their consent list, one of the players backstories has to do with surviving a sexual assault

A player lists "harm to children" on their consent list, one of the players backstories has to do with having been abused as a child

If this happens, let the person with these things on their consent form know that there are players who have these as a part of their planned backstory, but that you're going to talk to them, and then you guys will figure out where to go from there.

Go to the players who have these things in their backstories and ask them if it's really important to them that it's there. As I said, some people work things out through their RP characters, so it could be really important to a player to have that as their backstory. And it can be easy to say "well, they can just do it in a different game where this other person isn't playing." But not everyone has another game, and it isn't fair to tell someone flat out that they're not allowed to play the game in a way that would be meaningful to them, just as it wouldn't be okay to tell someone that they just have to deal with something that triggers or upsets them in a game. As them if they'd be willing to make changes to remove this thing from their backstory. Maybe suggest figuring something out that could work as a sort of metaphor or stand-in.

If they say no, be very delicate in how you move forward. Let them know, without naming names, that this thing they're including in their backstory could be triggering to someone else (everyone should have been given the option of filling out a form or having the consent discussion with you, so they should all be aware that it's a thing). Without demanding they tell you their story, ask them if the reason they want to keep it in their backstory is personal and important to them. If they say no to that question, then it's becoming more and more likely that you're just dealing with someone who wants their way no matter what. If they're saying it's not an important personal thing for them AND they're unwilling to adjust the backstory to use something that could work as an analog, then they're definitely approaching the point of being selfish and unreasonable.

But if they it is important for them to have this thing as a part of their backstory and they're unwilling to change it to something else that could symbolize it, this is when you need to start looking to bringing them together, in some way, to compromise. Obviously, the easiest way to do this is to have a sit down with both of them to discuss it. Ask them both if they would be comfortable doing that. Again, do not frame it or phrase it in any way that would make it feel like if they say no they're not going to get what they're asking for. Accept the fact that on both sides you're going to be dealing with very personal subjects, and that they might not want any of the other players knowing about these particular things.

If either one says no to getting together to discuss it, you're going to have to act as a go between.

Either way, the next step is to go to the person with the consent for and explain that this is an aspect of the other player's backstory that's important to them and ask if there's some way a compromise can be reached where they can both get what they want. Perhaps propose a situation where the other player is allowed to have this thing as a part of their backstory as long it's things aren't explained in detail, or maybe even where there's a signal given when they're going to be talking about this part of their backstory so the player with the consent for can excuse themselves. Or ask if it would be okay if it's a part of the player's backstory as long as there are not further depictions of it in the story.

If the person with the consent form says no to compromise, and the person with this thing in their backstory is unwilling to change it, then you're in a situation where you either have to tell one of them "too bad", which might result in one of them not playing in your game. That's a possibility you have to be prepared for.

So your question is 'which one do I tell no to'? This is tough, because either way, you're going to feel like and asshole because you're going to be telling someone they can't have something that's very important to them. For you it might come down to who you feel was the most unwilling to compromise, and that's a completely valid way to go. I don't think there's an answer that's going to be correct 100% of the time. For me, personally, I would probably in most cases tell the person with the thing in their backstory that they have to change it. It sucks for them that they won't be able to put this personal thing into their character and maybe work out some things they need to work out through it. But the truth is, there are still ways that they can play the game where they can enjoy it and have a safe and happy experience. That wouldn't be true if the situation were reversed, if the one being told no was the one with the consent form. If this thing is triggering for them so much that it can't even be in a character's backstory, then there's no version of the game that's going to be a safe and fun experience for them if it's there.

But that might not always be the answer. You might feel that one party is refusing to compromise not out of what they need, but because they just want what they want and don't care about anyone else's needs. You might not like the way one of them behaved during the whole thing. There's not one, single answer to this question, and you'll have to on how you feel. It's definitely important to take their behavior and attitude into account (if they're unwilling to compromise on this they might be unwilling to compromise about other things, make concessions for other players, and generally work together once the game is going), but it's really important that you look at the situation and consider which one would still be able to find enjoyment in the game if you told them they couldn't have what they're asking for, and which one wouldn't be able to have a safe experience if you told them they couldn't have what you're asking for.

Then there are the times when what's being requested would majorly impact the way the other players are allowed to play the game. Now, you might decide to honor the person with the consent reform's request and just cut that thing out of the game. And that's a perfectly valid choice. But if you're going to do that, you have to let your other players know about it. All of your players need to be aware of what kind of game they're getting into, what is and isn't allowed, so they can make an informed choice about whether they want to play or not.

Usually this type of situation comes down to things like romance/sex. A player might put on their consent form that they're not comfortable with romance or sex in games. And that's one of the big topics you need clarification on. If they just say that they're uncomfortable with those things for just their character, then great! Not a problem. The only problem you might run into is that one of the other players might get it into their head that their character has a thing for this other player's character. In which case you're left with the options of either having the player that is uncomfortable about it letting everyone know beforehand so that doesn't happen, or privately approaching the "pursuing" character once it starts happening to ask them to stop.

But you might find yourself in the situation where they say that they're not comfortable with romance or sex happening at all.

A tiny tangent here as we talk about approaching the matter of sex itself, because it's a little more complicated than just romance. "Sex" is kind of vague when it comes to talking about consent in these games, so before you even get to the point of asking about whether they're just referring to their own character, or if they're referring to everyone, you need to try to establish what they mean by "sex." Obviously, refer back up to the paragraph about how to approach asking them for further detail. If they're willing to discuss it, you need to clarify if they mean no sex, ever, not even mentioned, or if it's okay if it's mentioned but just not shown or implied to be happening, or if they're okay with the "fade to black" type of thing. After you've established that, then you can get into how broadly they expect it to be applied.

If they say that they expect it to be applied to every character, which means that none of the other players can pursue romantic relationships or sex at all, then you're in a situation where you're going to have to ask the other players to completely eliminate something that many consider a major part of the game. Like I said, if you want to just do it, make that decision and make all sex and relationships off limits, that's perfectly find. But  you have to let your other players know before you start the game. Both so that they don't try to do it, only the get shut down, but also so that they can make an informed decision about whether or not they want to play. Removing something that big as a possibility from the game is a big thing, and you very will might end up with people who decide they don't want to play. That's something you have to be ready for if you're going to make that kind of decision.

If you're not going to make that decisions right away, then you're going to want to ask your players if they're okay with it. The best thing to do would be to ask one by one so that they don't feel pressured by anyone else, and so that they can't single out the person who made the request. Do not start by saying "would you be okay with this not being in the game, because it would be triggering for so and so". You don't need to bring the consent form into it right away. Just start by asking how they would feel if you made it off limits. Ask them if it's something they really consider essential to the enjoyment of the game. If they're resistant to the idea, then you might want to appeal to their empathy by bringing up that removing it for the game would hel pin making the player with the consent form feel safe playing the game. (Remember though, don't name names).

Be prepared for the possibility that at least one of them say no, that they consider this thing an important part of the game and they wouldn't be okay with it not being an option. I know in reading these things it's easy to see those people as being unsympathetic and unfair, but I would urge you not to think that way, at least not right away. A lot of people have very specific ways they like to play these games, and for some people the wish fulfillment aspect that they get out of these specific things can be incredibly important and meaningful to them. Now, that doesn't mean that you have to side with them, and that doesn't mean that they're necessarily the right fit for your game. It just means that they're not a shitty person just because they're very attached to this aspect of the game.

If you end up with players who say no, they would not be okay with this thing being removed from the game, then you once again have to make a decision about which way you're going to go. And again, that's going to come down to what you think is fair and reasonable. You might decide to eliminate this thing from the game in order to give the player with the consent form what they need. You might decide that if they need this thing that is an important part of the game to other players gone, then your game and group just isn't the right one for them. Again, it's up to you, what you feel is right, how you feel your players behaved when discussing these things.

It is important to remember that not every game is for every person, and that it's okay if that's the case. If someone doesn't like to be scared or they're triggered by horror, then a Call of Cthulhu game probably isn't for them, and you're not being insensitive for saying so. You're not being insensitive for not choosing another game or removing all the horror elements just so they can play. It's okay to just explain that this game probably isn't for them and that they probably want to find another group. (If you have the resources and ability to do so, help them find a new group as much as you can.)

I think that SOME of the things that might come into question when it comes to discussing consent with your players fit into that. Like the above mentioned issue with romance. I've actually been in this situation before. It's one thing if they just don't want their character involved in any sort of romantic situation. But ask all of the other players to also give up that aspect of the game is a big thing. Some might be willing to do that, but some might not. I had a player who had been in some very bad relationships and romantic situations, and she was still at the point where seeing romantic relationships, even healthy ones, was incredibly difficult for her. So her request was that the option for romance be eliminated entirely. But I had players in that game for whom being able to have romantic relationships was a really important element of the game. One of my players in particular had written a husband into her backstory. All of my players looked forward to the chance to have some fun, in-game romantic relationships that they were in control of, and I just didn't think it was fair to take that away from them, so I told the player with the consent form exactly that. That I didn't feel okay doing that, that I was more than happy to make sure her character was off limits for romance and romantic storylines, but I didn't feel okay doing that to the rest of the players. I told her that if she thought she could handle that she was more than welcome to play, but that otherwise our group wasn't a good fit for her.

And that's okay. Not every person is going to fit in every group, and there's nothing wrong with that. It doesn't make the group or the player that doesn't fit bad or wrong. It just means there's a different group or a different game out there for them.

However, there are some things, a LOT of things, when it comes to matter of consent in TTRPGs where that's not the case, where asking players not to include certain things, or not including certain things in your game, is perfectly reasonable, and where not doing so when someone needs it is entirely unreasonable. There are things that games do NOT need, that players should NOT need in order to have an enjoyable experience. A game does NOT need sexual assault, a game does NOT need graphic descriptions of abuse, or graphic descriptions of gore. A game does NOT need depictions of genocide. Yes, there are absolutely areas where compromise is a possibility. I've talked about a few possibilities of that here. Compromising on things like allowing a player to have a certain thing that's triggering for another player in their backstory as long as it doesn't actually occur within the game, agreeing not to graphically describe the blood and gore happening in battle, agreeing not to give graphic description of certain kinds of accidents or physical trauma. Yes, someone seeking to play a game like D&D and requesting no violence might be unreasonable. But requests that graphic descriptions are avoided is not, and nobody NEEDS those things in order to enjoy a game. You shouldn't NEED to include bugs, you shouldn't NEED to include a challenge where a character gets buried alive,  you shouldn't NEED to include rats, and neither should your players.

And this is especially true when it comes to what you are including in your story. As I say extensively in the first essay I did on this topic, part of being a GM is being flexible with your storytelling, because it's not YOUR story, it's a collaborative story, being told by you AND your players. You should be able to be flexible so you can give your players what they want, what will make them most happy, to let them explore the stories they want to explore. That also goes for giving them what they need to have a safe and fun experience. If rats are important to your world building, there's no reason you can't swap out rats for another kind of animal if a player has a rat phobia. If you've included sexual assault as an important piece of one of your story thread, there should be no reason that you can't swap it out for something else if one of your players is triggered by sexual assault.

The ONLY time you should be thinking about whether or not you should honor a player's consent requests is if what they're asking for would limit or effect the things the PLAYERS get to do in the game. As the GM, you should ALWAYS be able and willing to change things in your story in order to allow the players to feel safe and have fun.

Once you've made all your decisions about your players' consent requests, you need to make sure your players are aware of what's okay for them to do and what isn't. You don't have to say "because this person needs this thing". You don't even need to tell them that any of it is because of the consent requests. You just need to, before you start playing, go over the rules that are specific to your game.

It's important that you don't just worry about consent at the beginning of the game and then treat it like that's it, don't have to worry about it again. You should be doing check ins every few months. Sometimes people will realize that they needed a concession that they weren't aware of until the gameplay actually started. Sometimes people will go through things or have experiences after they originally talked to you before they started playing. You need to make sure that you're constantly checking in to make sure that everything is okay, that all of your players are safe and having fun. You can't always trust that they're just going to come to you if something happens. You need to take the initiative and check in with them. That's one of the most important parts of being a GM.

Dealing with your players' consent requests can sometimes be really easy. But sometimes it can be really tough, and you'll have to deal with other players and you'll be forced to make difficult decisions. But part of being a GM is dealing with the tough things that happen between players, and getting your players what they need. A lot of people think that being a GM is just making up the story and telling the players what they need to do. But a HUGE amount of being a GM happens outside of the game. It's not just about telling a story. You're responsible for your players and giving them what the need, and that takes a lot of interpersonal work. If you're not comfortable with that, or if you're not willing to do that, then being a GM probably isn't for you, and you'd be better off just writing your stories and putting them up online. Being a GM is a responsibility. Role playing games can be an incredibly vulnerable experience, and your players are trusting you to take care of them. Don't put people who are in a vulnerably position at risk just because you don't want to deal with the interpersonal, out-of-game part of the job.

If you have any further questions, let me know. There's a whole other essay in HOW to implement changes into your game and story based on players' consent requests, stuff all about how to figure out different things that can send the same message or different ways to get events moving, etc. If anyone is interested in reading that, let me know and I'll add it to the list!

[saltineofswing]

Ozzy or Drell?

Obvs I got one for Drell SO:

Full Name: Osmanthus Quince, Sword of Storms

Gender andSexuality: Male;probably bisexual

Pronouns: He/him

Ethnicity/Species: Homo Anubii (Shortened to‘Anubii’ in 99% of situations), a race of technically-undead beings whosegenesis is attributed to Worldmarrow, pure unfiltered magic in liquid form.Worldmarrow makes up the core of the planet and frequently wells up in largeamounts to the crust, magically altering things at random. One of the productsof this phenomenon are the Anubii, who owe their existence to the abandonedorganic material of the sapient races of The Road. There are two varieties:Whole and Imperfect. Imperfect Anubii are covered in Sal’s post here, inregards to Domino the Dominator, but Whole Anubii are, ehhh, a little harder toexplain. They don’t quite resemble any of the races that currently inhabit TheRoad… but the various skin colors they appear in are vaguely reminiscent ofthe mysterious Liches that inhabit the massive millennia-old necropolisesbeneath the surface of the continent. This is a painfully obvious connectionbut nobody has actually officially put it together for a variety of reasons, somost people consider it to be one of the grand mysteries of the Road’s society.

Specifically,although nobody now alive has the words for it, Ozzy would be half-Gariagaxianand half-Bogribolan, as evidenced by his pale hair and sort of indistinctlygrayish skin that you could construe as faintly yellow-tinted or faintlyblue-tinted; in addition, Ozzy was born a little extra special – he is what’sknown as a ‘Lesser Lich’, a type of Anubii identifiable by their incrediblemagical potential… and the subsequent mental instability that accompaniessuch power. If a Lesser Lich is put under too much stress, they have a chanceto breach a power threshold and ‘emerge’ into a Greater Lich; Ozzy,specifically, is a Supremator, a subtype of Lich with an extraordinary controlover an elemental force (in Ozzy’s rather exceptional case four of them –Lightning, Water, Wind, and Ice, giving him the title of ‘Storm Supremator’).

Birthplaceand Birthdate:Actually, Ozzy doesn’t come from the Road’s prime timeline, or ‘Primeline’. Theversion of The Road that he hails from is one we affectionately refer to as the‘Mindrunner’ timeline, where the powerfully Psionic hivemind species known asthe Uluth were able to survive their… rocky exodus through the Unknown, fromtheir dying homeworld to the Road. As a result, the trajectory of thedevelopment of both the continent and the society was drastically altered.Notably, the Psionic energy that saturates the atmosphere due to the abundanceof Uluth Overminds across the continent places an inordinate pressure on theminds of Anubii, resulting in an incredibly high incidence rate of Anubiiexplosively developing into Liches. Because nobody really knew what to do withthem, and the understanding of mental health in this world remains somewhatabysmal, facilities were created where Liches could be sent to keep them calmand/or sedated, and in a lot of cases kept in stasis until a long-term solutioncould be divined.

This meansthat the culture into which Ozzy was born views and treats him as a second orsometimes even third-class citizen, where Anubii that are too powerful or areat risk of turning into Liches are taken away to any of several installationsof ‘The Facility’ and the governing bodies use the populace’s fear and lack ofunderstanding to pass laws that blatantly infringe on Anubii’s civil rights.Ozzy was born in 2002 (Mindrunner is set in 2025), in the ever-cloudy southerncoast of the Tidelands. He was born in the suburbs of The Well, MetropolitanZone Prill-003, named for the local Uluth Overmind. Ozzy is a second-generationWhole Anubii and is an orphan, adopted by two human parents, so his exactbirthday is sort of nebulous. Best guess, he was born during the hot rains ofSummer.

GuiltyPleasures: Ozzyis a really shy guy with very little self esteem and a lot of internalizedissues, so he feels guilty about enjoying himself doing just about everything.He’s grown out of most of it, but highlights include: long showers or baths,colorful clothing, expensive tools, taking apart expensive or sophisticatedmachinery (especially if it doesn’t belong to him), and other stuff that hefeels like makes him ‘impose’ on the world around him too much. A big one,though: using his powers just for his own enjoyment.

Phobias: Not only is Ozzy very shy, he is also a peerlesslyanxious guy. He’s got a LOT of phobias. It would be faster to name the stuffhe’s not afraid of – he’s kind of a coward – but there are a couple ReallyReally Big Ones: he is easily triggered by needles, medical equipment(especially especially ESPECIALLY anything that goes on his head), and mentalinstitutions. He is terrified by the prospect of losing control, hates to beseen/looked at/placed in a position of authority, and is horribly averse to thespotlight. After all, he spent most of his life trying to hide his true natureto avoid getting crammed in a stasis pod for the rest of his natural-bornexistence. He also doesn’t really like to be touched, especially by people hedoesn’t know, and is also rather averse to enclosed spaces and restraints.

What TheyWould Be Famous For:If it weren’t for the whole mess Ozzy has become embroiled in, he wouldprobably be famous for his engineering prowess. Ozzy is a genius-levelintellect, and is a talented machinist in his own right – he was able to get ascholarship to work a janitorial job at a college where he was working towardsseveral different tech-based degrees. He created a technology for prosthesisthat utilizes the Uluth’s Psionic-sensitive material known as ‘Mindstone’ as acore and a tough but lightweight and magically reactive plasteel compound,allowing the prosthetic to be linked directly to the user’s mind and react notonly to their mental commands but also to their expectations; if the userexpects to feel touch sensation, they will. If the user expects the plasteel tofeel and behave like flesh, it will (to an extent). It’s really a miracle ofmodern engineering. If his life had panned out differently, he would’veprobably been taught about in medical textbooks for decades on decades.

Also in a wayOzzy is famous, both in the primeline by way of the Wild Hunt and in theMindrunner timeline due to his… legal status. As an inescapable part of hisfights being televised to the Threnghelleon viewing public, Ozzy has been puton blast in a way; he seemed like a huge wimp to everyone (including members ofthe ‘home team’, so to speak) until he literally could not hold back his powerany longer and kicked the ever-living shit out of notorious Wild Hunt bruiserEthem-Cailo in his very first fight. That very first victory was seen as a HUGEupset, and it’s gotten him a ‘following’ amongst the Threnghel populace. Thisis not necessarily a good thing.

What TheyWould Get Arrested For: Existing, actually. When faced with the choice of submitting to a newordinance requiring all Anubii with ‘At Risk’ or higher status (denoting therisk factor for an individual to become a Lich) to be ‘chipped’ with atransmitter and status indicator, or probably just being straight-up taken awayto The Facility, he had a mental breakdown and revealed that he was a Lich (afact he’d been hiding for years). So he went on the run! Canonically, Osmanthuswould probably be arrested for defying Overmind ordinances, failing to reporthimself as a Lich, resisting arrest, defying basically all Emergence protocols,resisting and evading Pure Fold detainment squads, assaulting a police officer,assaulting a Pure Fold agent, associating with known governmental dissidents,conspiracy to commit a felony, conspiracy to incite a riot… uh, et cetera.

OC You ShipThem With: He hasa girlfriend! Her name is Rosemary, they’ve been best friends since highschool, and she is definitely the one who has the spine in their relationship.When Ozzy went on the run, Rosie basically dropped everything and went on therun with him. Otherwise, when it comes to idle speculation, I think Ozzy hasgood chemistry with Fee; he literally took a plasma bolt to the gummy-works forher before he even knew her, which has endeared him to her somewhat.

OC MostLikely To Murder Them: Ethem-Cailo, now Jovix-Cailo, has faced not one but two ‘humiliating’defeats at Ozzy’s hand now. After the first, Ozzy stole the legendary hammerMjolnir (not the version everybody is familiar with, but with a similarWorthiness parameter), which Ethem-Cailo himself had won by beating the hellout of the Aesir. He wants his hammer back, and is filled with hatred for the‘lowly’ mortal that stole it from him. In fact, Jovix-Cailo is going to havehis shot – the two of them are due for a reckoning, and there’s a significantchance that Ozzy might wind up dying in their final conflict. One of them isgonna have to.

FavoriteMovie/Book Genre:Sci-Fi, no question. Since he comes from a near-future and slightly dystopiantimeline, you’d think it holds no mystery for him. But it’s even more wild,speculative, and diluted there, so it’s still pretty nuts. This goeshand-in-hand with horror stuff, too (the more sci-fi, fantasy, or high-conceptthe better). He also enjoys fantasy to a lesser extent, and is a big fan ofsuperhero comics. He’s a fairly typically nerdy guy in his tastes in media.

Least Favorite Movie/Book Cliche: Ozzy has a certain appreciationfor most cliches and tropes, because he’s pretty good at analyzing media. Evenif he doesn’t necessarily enjoy a cliche, he’s able to appreciate the way itslots into a narrative. However, he is easily annoyed by Idiot Plots andanything that arises from people behaving ‘out of character’, which he feels isa sign that they had to force something to fit where it didn’t. He hates the‘We’re five feet from the exit but OH NO I TRIPPED!’ Trope, and glaring gaps inthe logic of the media in general – stuff that isn’t consistent with the rulespresented by the media in question.

Talentsand/or Powers: Asmentioned above, Ozzy is a genius-level intellect and is fond of tinkering;he’s dexterous and knowledgeable in the art of crafting machinery. He’stalented enough in the art of engineering to innovate functional prosthetics,and has a broad umbrella of technical know-how. He’s clever, quick on his feet,and isn’t a terrible tactician when he’s given a comfortable breadth to plan.He’s also crazy good at fighting games. Don’t challenge him to Street Fighterunless you want to know what it’s like to feel hatred for pixelated green menbecause you KNOW he mains Blanka.

What? You’resaying I’m forgetting something? I dunno. Oh, the lightning thing? Haha yeah,right, right.

Ozzy is aBLISTERINGLY powerful magus with an affinity for elemental magic –specifically, elements associated with the storm: Lightning, Wind, Water, andIce. He is so latently powerful that his mere presence can influence theoverhead weather if he’s not keeping a tight grip on his own magical aura.Once, Ozzy channeled enough lightning to power an entire town for about an hour(he did the math in-universe). Since then he’s actually gotten more powerful,to the point that the upper limit of the amount of electricity he can generateis unknown. The cost of all that power is that his body literally cannot handleit, hence why he has prosthetic arms now. In terms of gameplay mechanics, Ozzycan theoretically deal about 600 damage in a single turn with the proper confluenceof events. It costs him a significant amount of HP and CON, so it’s notsomething that can be used flippantly, but it’s a considerable boss-burner ifthe situation calls for it.

Recently, Ozzywas blinded in his one remaining fully-functional eye by a bad turn in a gameof divine chance by Al Fortuna, August En-Zaiid’s patron deity. However, notlong afterwards, Ozzy’s senses of Touch and Hearing were elevated to superhumanlevels by the whims of the very same game; currently he hasn’t had the opportunityto replace his eye with a prosthetic but he does have the ability to mapobjects around him in space based on electromagnetic fields and bioelectricity,and that with his super-hearing gives him a fairly precise image of the world.He just can’t read or watch TV or do anything too precise.

Why SomeoneMight Love Them:Osmanthus is a sweet guy with a big heart and a lot of empathy. He’s a verygood listener and has a very clever sense of humor. He’s smart and is willingto share his knowledge very liberally, but he shares inclusively and doesn’texplain so much as inform (narrow though the distinction may be). When he’scalm, he’s very methodical and cunning, and he gives pretty decent advice. Hehas no problem sharing the spotlight (prefers to stay out of it, in fact) andis very good about giving credit where credit is due – doesn’t hold grudges,nonexistent temper, doesn’t take stuff personally, and is quick with acorrection or a fact-check when needed. Some people enjoy a partner they canhelp or ‘fix’, so to speak, and Ozzy does have a lot of issues.

Why SomeoneMight Hate Them:As I’ve mentioned, Ozzy is a bit of a coward. His self-esteem is absolutelyabysmal and he is devastatingly non-confrontational to the point that he won’tstand up for himself at all unless absolutely forced to. He can seem a littlesniveling, especially since he has a pretty bad stutter that gets worse whenhe’s stressed. On top of that he is kind of hard to deal with at times; it’snot always easy for people to handle their own issues, let alone somebodyelse’s – and Ozzy has a lot of issues. When it’s at its worst, he’s incoherentand completely non-functional for the whole day; at it’s best, though, he stillhas trouble speaking coherently, has problems with dissociating and sometimeshearing things, and stuff like that. When he’s feeling talkative it’s hard toredirect his focus when he’s on a roll, which can interfere with his ability tolisten to other people and participate in group conversations, and if someone snapsat him too sharply he’ll just clam up and stop talking altogether. So,sometimes interacting with him can be tiresome.

How TheyChange: Ozzy haschanged A Lot since I first introduced him to the game in Mindrunner;originally he was a very lonely and honestly quite pathetic guy, with a lot ofproblems he’d completely given up on trying to solve, slogging through day today life and hiding his ‘At-Risk’ status. When Mindrunner started he wasactually suicidal, and had already failed two attempts due to his Lichabilities; although it was partially against his will, being swept up in theevents of that story gave him a will to live and the discipline to actually dosomething about his mental health and the state of the world at large. He hasdeveloped an incredibly fine control over his powers (which continue to grow astime goes on), met a bunch of new people, and has gotten in REALLY good shape,all in the span of half a year after spending most of his time as a skinny-fatjanitor at a second-choice college. Ozzy is working on his self-esteem, whichis coming along slowly but surely; after taking Mjolnir from Ethem-Cailo he hasdeveloped a reliance on the hammer as a sort of crutch for his self-esteem – ifthe fabled mythological hammer of the Aesir deems him ‘worthy’, he probably is,right? It’s a good first step, but the events of his next campaign willprobably involve confronting that crutch. He’s not a hero yet, per se, but he’sgetting there.

It’s not allpositive, unfortunately; since Ozzy started to grow exponentially more powerfulafter his ‘emergence’ into a full Lich Supremator, Ozzy has also begun tosuffer from adrenaline-influenced mood swings and the occasional bout of mania.As is the case with many Liches throughout the history of both Mindrunner andthe Prime Timeline, Ozzy has developed a trigger-response to life-or-deathstressors in which he undergoes a mental status shift and gets much moresevere, violent, and manic that he refers to as The Lich Shift. An unstable butmostly manageable issue that only really rears its ugly head when Ozzy isconfronted with significant danger. The problem is, Ozzy is currently under theweight of several long-term mental stressors: Everybody keeps telling him thathe’s going to have to kill Jovix-Cailo, and although he knows that’s the rightthing to do, he’s never killed anyone before – and he’s going to have to killagain, in the civil war that is all but waiting for him back on his home plane.The burden of responsibility in these situations has begun to warp the ‘LichShift’ defense mechanism into something more distinct and disparate.

Why YouLove Them: Ozzywas originally made because I wanted to turn my Destiny OC Euclid into atabletop character, but he almost instantly became a unique character that wasthe star of a surprisingly in-depth and exciting one-off game. Both Sal (TheDM) and I decided pretty instantly that we wanted to do more with him. I thinkhe’s a fairly nuanced, complicated character for what he is; I feel likecharacters with his type and severity of problems don’t often get to strugglefor their own benefit (as opposed to the audience’s schadenfreude), and despiteevery setback he’s still kicking and still making progress, which I think isvery relatable and very important. He’s got a lot of handicaps and regrets andphobias but he fights anyway. He’s the underdog, he’s grown up taking shit forbeing born, his own powers threaten to kill him, but he fights anyway. Peoplehave unrealistic expectations for him. His life has been completely ruined andflipped upside-down by the choices he’s been forced to make. His reward is along, uphill slog with few immediate gratifications. He Fights Anyway.Characters in his position I feel like get shoehorned to side-character, orkilled off, or turn into the bad guy, or all of the above, but Ozzy is theprotagonist and that gives him a really interesting breadth of emotion andchange. And also, he’s cute.

[sugasnae]

Friend zone - 1

Summary:

You had had a crush on your best friend for as long as you could remember, there was definitely no doubt about that. He never saw you that way and it was best that you came to terms with that. It didn’t help when he got a girlfriend and you were forced to get rid of your feelings. It didn’t help at all.

1 2 3

Genre: Angst

Admin: Nova

Word Count: 2.1k

Warnings:

Extremely triggering, mentions of suicide, suicide attempts, mentions of rape, small rape section. Please be aware I don’t want this to be extremely triggering but I will have a part of that and I hope it is still readable to others. I want my stories to be real without sugar coating anything but I will try my best to minimize it if possible.

College seemed like the dream life. All in all, it was. You were away from your parents, siblings, and you got to be roommates with your best friend since elementary school. You were a couple of hours away from your hometown but got to live in the city going to school in your dream university. Your high school years were finally over, they weren’t terrible but you were thankful to be an adult.

“Y/n I’m going to class then I’m going to hang out with the guys.” Jungkook informed, keys in hand along with his school supplies. You nodded over to him from where you sat on the couch as he headed towards the door.

“Alright, have fun!” You yelled out.

“See you tonight!” and the door slammed shut.

You sighed throwing your head back against the sofa.

Jungkook. Your best friend since elementary school, and your crush. Of course the whole ordeal was never planned, for so many years you both saw each other as siblings. That was until a childish high school party when you were sophomores and a game of 7 minutes of heaven forced the both of you to stay locked in a closet. Nothing happened but the first few minutes you two stood in awkwardness before Jungkook caved in and laughed at the situation. The rest of the night was filled with giggles from you two and it was never mentioned again.

While the night carried on you couldn’t help but think of the possibilities.

What if.

From then on you started noticing things about Jungkook that best friends usually wouldn’t. You didn’t let your feelings contradict your abilities of being a great friend. You knew Jungkook didn’t feel the same way, and slowly but surely, you were getting over him.

Your phone rang suddenly, scaring you a bit out from your daze. You struggled to find it hidden between the couch cushions but you found it and quickly answered.

“Tae! What’s up?” You asked, out of breath.

“Y/n! Gosh I haven’t heard your voice in forever how are you?”

You laughed, “Tae we hung out yesterday, and I’m fine how are you?”

“Y/n it seems like forever. That’s great, i’m great. Let’s hang out tonight.”

“Aren’t you hanging out with Jungkook?” You questioned recalling Jungkook mentioning his plans before leaving.

“Hm, no he didn’t mention wanting to hang out today when I talked to him this morning.”

“Oh, well sure let’s hang out.”

“Great! I’ll be by to pick you up at seven alright?”

“Alright, I’ll see you later.” You laughed and hung up the phone. It was only noon so you decided you were going to stay on the couch for a bit.

Seven O’clock rolled around faster than you expected. You dressed casual with a simple pair of jeans, a flannel, and a plain top. You sat on the couch bored waiting for Taehyung and secretly Jungkook. You hadn’t heard from him since earlier, you wished he would have been honest and told you where he was really going since it wasn’t with the guys but there wasn’t anything you could do now.

There was a light knock on your door and you hurried over to unlock it opening it to Taehyung who stood before you with his famous boxy smile.

“Hey Y/n, ready?”

“Yep!” You smiled and walked out closing the door behind you making sure to lock it.

“Where are we going by the way?” You asked as you two began walking down the hall together. Taehyung slung his arm over your shoulders.

“Just getting a bite to eat with everyone then we were thinking of watching a movie afterwards.”

“Sounds fun, glad you called or else I would have been on the couch all day.”

“Would have?” Taehyung laughed. “Y/n you were on the couch all day.” You rolled your eyes but you knew he was right. It only took you thirty minutes to get ready and you were planted on the sofa before that.

You and Taehyung arrived at a small restaurant you and everyone else hung out at. The seven boys showed you this hidden building and you were very thankful as it had become your hang out spot for the eight of you. You had showed it to a few other friends but you never invited them while you were out with the boys because it was a precious space for all of you.

You walked into the warm building, the smell of fresh meal filling your senses and your mouth began to water thinking about you own meal. It was the same feeling you got when you first walked through the doors. Jungkook had introduced you to his new classmates outside and you all ate knowing only a little about one another. Months passes and you all were close friends.

“Y/n!” The boys sang in unison. Namjoon was the first to stand up and greet you in a hug followed by Hoseok, Jimin, Jin, and lastly Yoongi. You gave them all warm hugs and took a seat in between Jimin and Jin as they handed you your menu. You said a small thank you and began reading through the menu. It was useless as you always ordered the same thing but you did it anyway.

“How come Kookie didn’t come?” Jimin asked you.

“He said he had made plans with you guys but Tae said he didn’t mention anything so I don’t know.” You shrugged.

“Wasn’t he going out tonight with that girl he’s been seeing?” Hobi cut in. Your body stiffened as you turned over to him with a confused look.

“Kookie has been seeing someone?” You asked. “He never told me-”

“He didn’t even tell us, we had to pressure him into spilling.” Namjoon shrugged.

“Wait wait.” Tae waved his arms over the table as if to silence everyone who wasn’t talking. “How come I’m barely finding this out?” He exclaimed in disbelief. The boys laughed except for Jimin who was reassuringly patting your knee.

“You always make a big deal.” Suga admitted plainly.

“And that is an excuse for not telling me? Im hurt, really I am.” He placed his hand over his heart.

Everyone smiled and carried onto another conversation. You turned to Jimin whispering softly to him so no one else could hear. “You knew?”

Jimin sighed and nodded, a look of guilt washing over him. “I’m sorry Y/n I didn’t want to hurt you.”

You quickly shook your head and rubbed his hand reassuringly. “No I get it, don’t worry. Thank you for caring.” You and Jimin exchanged sad smiles before turning back to the group and joining in on their pointless conversation.

Jimin was the only one who knew about your feelings. He was the only one who caught you staring at Jungkook longer than needed and looking at him a certain way. Once he had noticed he wouldn’t leave you alone till you told him the reasons why.

The conversations continued the boys bickering and you laughing at them. They were currently scolding Jin for accidentally taking your plate and eating it straight away.

“We ordered the same thing how was I supposed to know?”Jin exclaimed trying to defend his case.

“You know Y/n doesn’t get all that random stuff on her food.” Yoongi scolded.

“Who’s older here?” Jin stood from his seat pushing his chest out trying to look intimidating but failing miserably. You couldn’t breathe from all the laughter. Everyone’s laughter died down but you continued to die of laughter.

“Jungkookie what are you doing here?” Namjoon spoke over your giggle fit. You laughter died down as you looked up at Jungkook who stood by your table with a pretty petite girl clung to his arm.

“Oh, Yuna and I were going to eat then head to the movies.” Jungkook said nervously looking over the table with slight shock.

“Is this her? Its nice to meet you.” Hobi smiled politely at her and waved. Everyone else murmured small hello’s and nice to meet you’s. You waved at her and gave her a soft smile saying a polite hello. You were being nice but your stomach was knotting.

“Yuna, these are my friends Hoseok, Namjoon, Yoongi, Jin, Jimin, and–Y/n” Jungkook paused before saying your name but continued nonetheless.

“Oh it’s lovely meeting you all! Jungkook talks about you all a lot.” She smiled shyly.

“Ah, he talks about me the most doesn’t he?” Jin said cockily.

“I think it’s even.” She laughed. “I’ve never heard of you Y/n it’s nice to meet you.”She placed her hand out towards you. You paused for a moment, your heart feeling like it was about to burst out of your chest. Why hadn’t he even mentioned me? You finally placed your hand in hers and shook it giving her a small smile.

“ Are you dating..?” She nodded her head towards Jimin who was sitting beside you. Your eyes widened and you brought your hands up in defense chuckling. Both you and Jimin gave continuous no’s.

Jungkook scratched his neck from behind Yuna nervously looking at you with a sorry expression. “Actually, Y/n is my roomate.”

That hurt just as much. You were just his roommate. You decided to let it go, maybe she wouldn’t have wanted to hear that you were his best friend.

“Oh! I’m sorry,” She laughed. “Nice to meet all of you.”

“Why don’t you two join us at the movies? We’re going now anyways.” Namjoon offered.

“Ah I don’t know hyung, we haven’t eaten yet.” Jungkook said biting his lip and shifting on both his feet.

“Kookie let’s go, I want to get to know your friends.” Yuna intervened with a cheerful smile.

“You sure we won’t intrude?” Jungkook asked almost scared of the answer. Everyone yelled out no’s and you only smiled.

Maybe this will help, maybe you’ll get over him.

“You guys are fine don’t worry,” You chuckled, wanting to be welcoming. “We we’re going to watch that new rom-com.”

“Y/n made us, we wanted to see the new horror movie.” Jin groaned and slouched in his seat.

“Don’t act tough, you wanted to see it just as much as her.” Yoongi laughed.

“Did not.”

“Did too.”

“Well I’m stuffed, should we head out?” Hobi asked patting his stomach. Everyone nodded and stood from their seats. Everyone filed out from the restaurant and into the city streets where passersby walked mindlessly.

“So how is this going to work?” Yoongi asked referring to who was going to ride with who since everyone met up at the restaurant.

“Well I rode with Jin and Jimin, Yoongi and Hobi rode together and Y/n walked with Tae.” Namjoon spoke.

“I drove with Yuna, so if Y/n and Tae want to join they can.” Jungkook offered.

“No it’s fine really, Tae and I can just ride with Hobi and Yoongs.” You said and Tae nodded in agreement beside you. Jungkook nodded with a small smiled and dug his hands into his pockets.

“Great it’s settled, let’s hit the road!” Jin clapped his hands and turned around beginning to walk over to his car and everyone else followed before walking to their own cars.

You and Tae climbed into the back seat of Yoongi’s car settling yourself in and laying your head on Tae’s shoulder once he got in as well. You were tired and had an urge to make up an excuse so you could go home and not have to see Jungkook with Yuna but you already promised the boys you would hang out with them and had no other choice.

Just ignore them.

It was extremely difficult to ignore them.

Surprisingly the theater had been full, leaving a limited amount of seats. You all wanted to sit next to each other rather than having to be sat in different areas but the only row that you all like contained 8 seats. You offered to sit by yourself as you didn’t feel he best either way but everyone disagreed and practically strapped you down to the second to last empty seat beside Jimin. Jungkook and Yuna were the only ones left standing. Jungkook spotted two empty seats on the other side of the theater but Yuna shook her head and sat Jungkook down into the empty seat beside you and sat on his lap.

You didn’t dare look at the two. You kept your eyes focused on the large screen in front of you barely comprehending what the plot was about because your mind was all over the place.

“Y/n are you alright?” Jungkook asked softly in your ear with concern. You turned to him and nodded in response with a smile.

“Everything is fine don’t worry. Pass me the popcorn please?”

The rest of the night was filled with giggles coming from the couple beside you and buttery covered mouth and fingers, because stuffing your face with food was better than being slowly hurt by your best friend.

[allisonilluminated]

A Comprehensive Guide to Tagging

Hey all,

Tagging is super easy to figure out, but can be deceptively hard to figure out how to master.  Most authors will probably change their tags at some point in between starting and finishing their story.  The thing is, tags are one of the biggest ways people will discover and read your stories, so it's super important to get them right.

Why are tags so important?  Your tags, along with your summary, are the criteria your readers will use to decide whether to read or not.  This means that it’s important to both advertise what’s great about your story, but also any objectionable content that some readers want to avoid.

One of the biggest challenges about tags is that FFN and AO3 have completely different tagging systems.  If you're cross-posting your work, you're going to have to figure both out.  This post will be broken down into types of tags, then specified between the two sites.

Before we get into any specifics, this should be your fundamental tagging philosophy - “Would I be satisfied to come across this story if I was browsing this tag? If so, tag it. If not, don't.”  (Awesome quote from u/Zaluzianskya on reddit)

Now, to get into specifics...

Ratings:

The rating of your fic requires you to have an answer to the question, “Who is my target audience?”  If you don't know how to answer that, think about maturity.  Am I writing a dark gritty fic, or a light comedy? Do I have gratuitous sex, or is my story gen?  

FFN has four different ratings, and AO3 has five.  Here's a breakdown of each one:

K (FFN Only) – These fics probably have no violence, no swearing, and no relationships stronger than friendship.

K+ (FFN) and General Audiences (AO3) – If you're writing one of these stories, there's probably some cartoon violence, maybe some light swearing, and some cutesy shipping.  This tag is for lighter fics, especially if they fall under the Slice of Life, Humor, Family, or Friendship genres.  Nothing here should merit an archive warning on AO3.

T/Teen (Both) – This is the default rating for a fanfiction, so if you're not sure, it probably fits here.  Violence, cursing, and non-explicit relationships are enough to land a fic here, and the majority of works do fall under this description.  The Adventure, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Romance, and Drama genres all find their home here, although works of every genre are in this rating.

Mature (FFN) – If you write a mature story and post it to FFN, it will be automatically filtered off the home page.  That's okay, because a ton of people seek out these sex filled, violent stories about immoral acts and other horrors.  If there is explicit sex, your story must go here – especially non-con.  Since FFN doesn't have content filters, it's extremely important that your reader knows when they're reading a story about suicide, rape, or another triggering event.  It's your responsibility to make your story M if there is any explicit description of such things.  If you're not explicit about sex or such, T is still a fine rating, but use your discretion. The Horror genre has a nice home here, I don't need to see that scary stuff on my front page.  Note: Explicit sex is not allowed under FFN’s terms of service.  AO3 is a much friendlier place for smut, with more readers as well, so you would be better off posting it there.

Mature (AO3) – Same as FFN, with two key differences.  First, these stories will show up on the front page, so no worries about that.  Second, this is for graphic and objectionable content with no sex or nudity.  Save your lemons for…

Explicit (AO3 only) – Smut smut smut smuttity smut.  If your characters are having sexy time, it's an E for you.

Not Rated (AO3 only) – Honestly, if I see a not rated fic, I automatically assume it's Explicit and avoid it.  If you're writing a G fic and it's not rated, I can guarantee you you're losing readers because of it.  Don't use this one.

Genres (FFN):

Genre is a totally underrated aspect of the FFN tagging system, partly because it is horribly misused.  It's hard to know what genres to tag, especially when your work is an amalgamation of a bunch of different genres.  On top of that, you get to tag one before the other.  

I don't want to run through each one, but I'll walk you through how to choose your two genre tags.

Step One – Necessary Tags: Some genres are far more important to tag than others.  Here's a list of Genres you need to tag if it's a part of your story.

Horror: Believe it or not, a lot of people hate horror.  Absolutely tag this so those of us who scare easily get a fair warning.  Remember this will usually be an M rated fic.

Sci-Fi: This really is only important for non-sci-fi fandoms, but if you cast your heroes several thousand years into the future I want to know before I click on the story.

Parody: Note – this is different from humor, you don't need to tag a fic that's just funny.  If you're not taking canon seriously, or just playing around with it for your own amusement, please let me know ahead of time.

Poetry: Cool underused writing style in fanfiction, you should definitely tag it.

But wait, what about my Twilight Fic where Bella is trapped on a spaceship avoiding a tentacle monster named Edward trying to bewitch her into falling in love through stares and sparkles written in blank verse?

First off, that's incredible and somebody should write that.  Second of all, just choose two and roll with it. If you really need to know an order, Horror should probably come first, then Sci-fi, then Poetry, then Parody.

Step Two – Target Audience:  Who are you writing for?  Why are you writing this fic?  Why is somebody going to click on this story?  Here's a brief rundown.

Note: Don't use the general tag.  Passerbys want to know what your story's about, and this tag doesn't help at all.  I can guarantee that your fic fits at least one of the other genres.

Romance: Slash. Yuri.  Yaoi.  The singular het couple on AO3.  This is the most popular genre, and people want to look for it!  This is the single most important non-essential tag; if your story focuses on any kind of romance, let the crowd know!  We'll get back to this in character tags.

Adventure: Perfect for fandoms like Pokemon or TES.  If it's about the journey, this is the one for you.

Hurt/Comfort, Tragedy, Drama, Angst: For the feels.  Up to you to chose which one fits best, but you probably only need one of these unless your story is specifically telling you otherwise.

Mystery, Crime, Supernatural, Suspense: If it would fit on an airport bookshelf with the other thrillers, one of these is the genre for you.

Everything Else:  I think for the rest, it'll be pretty obvious which of these you want.

Remember that you don't need two genres. If you wrote a romance novel, it makes the most sense to tag it as pure romance!  Similarly, if you have one important guiding genre and a bunch of others that are less important, just tag the important genre.  Your tags should be the best summary of your fic possible given the limited system at hand.

Step Three: What Comes First?: So you've chosen one or two genres.  If there's only one, great!  You're done.  If you have two, ask yourself which one is more important to the story, what feels right, or just what looks more aesthetically pleasing.  Getting the tag down is what really matters, so you've already done the hard work.  Go you!

Completeness:

Completeness can be changed in the Manage Stories screen on FFN in your profile, or by editing your story and entering the number of chapters on AO3. A lot of people filter out works in progress, so make your hard work known!

Alright, that's it for the easy stuff, now let's talk about…

Character Tags (FFN):

Okay, the two tagging systems are about as different as is physically possible, so I'm going to do each on separately.  FFN is so much simpler and more efficient in terms of characters, so it's easier to cover.  There are two main character tagging philosophies for FFN, so we'll go over both before we talk about AO3's bloated mess.

Philosophy One: Main Character or Main Relationship – This is far and away the easiest tagging philosophy to execute.  Are there one or two characters who are most essential to your story, or whose perspective the reader gets to see?  Tag just them, and you're done. Is the whole point of your story shipping your OTP?  Just tag the romance and you're done.  For this philosophy, you don't have to use all four spots – it's absolutely fine if you only use one or two.

Philosophy Two:  All Four Tags – Basically after determining who you would tag for number one, choosing more characters so all four of your tagging spots are filled.  People will often tag a secondary relationship here, or give some of their secondary characters a spotlight.  It's important to remember that lots of people filter out by character, so if there's a character in your fandom who's much more popular than the rest, tagging them can increase your view count.

Note – Having no tags generally isn't advisable.  There are still amazingly written and popular fics on FFN with no character tags, but you're not doing yourself any favors.

Character Tags (AO3):

So, this one's a little bit more complicated.  First, let's breakdown what not to do.

Unlike FFN, you should have at least one character tag.  AO3 gives you so much more freedom than FFN with tagging, so it's way more jarring when a fic is completely untagged.

Do NOT overtag.  If you've ever been on AO3, you've probably seen the overtagged story too many times before.  This is probably the single worst tagging mistake you can make, don't do it.

Don't name your OCs in your tags.  Your original characters may be great, but that doesn't change the fact that nobody knows who they are unless they read the story.  Stick to the “Original Characters” tag and the gendered variants, no matter you have.

The most important thing about tagging on AO3 is something people forget far too often -  Just because you can use as many tags as you want doesn't mean you should. This is the golden rule for tagging on AO3: You shouldn't have more than 10 character tags and 5 relationship tags with one massive exception, see below.

A couple more things:

Use the “Undisclosed Relationships” tag.  You don't have to tag every relationship – surprise!  If two side characters (read – not important) falling in love is a side plot that the story doesn't focus on, then you don't need to tag it!  If two characters were dating in a flashback, you don't need to tag it!  Keep your relationships tag to the important ones.

Usually, you shouldn’t tag platonic relationships.  As a general rule of thumb, don’t tag these, because they’ll distract from your other relationships.  However, if your story is gen (no shipping) then it’s okay to tag the main relationship your focusing on.  To do this, tag it using the & sign instead of the / sign to indicate it’s a platonic relationship and not slash.  

Relationship Tags are distracting.  This might seem like a trivial point, but it’s actually really important to remember that relationship tags are designed to stand out.  That’s why they have a gray background.  If you have to many, it’s much harder to focus on your other tags.

None of the principles apply to smut.  People are kinky.  If you're writing a fic where you're shipping one character with literally everyone else from that fandom, feel free to tag every single pair/trio/orgy mentioned and shown in the fic. People want to know when their desired relationship is being shown, so tell them.  Basically for Explicit fics only, but also might go for a big harem fic that's rated M/T.

Archive Warnings (AO3):

These aren't that hard to understand.  If your characters are dying in droves, tag Major Character Death.  If rape is mentioned, then tag Rape/Non-Con.  If you're writing smut about fifteen year olds, tag Underage.  If your characters are getting torn apart in a slow torturous death with lots of blood, tag Graphic Depictions of Violence.  

Do not use “Author Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings.”  Some writers accidentally equate this with “No Warnings Apply,” but it’s an instant red flag for most readers.  It comes across as shady and untrustworthy, and readers won’t want to read your work.

There really shouldn't be any General rated stories with archive warnings. If you need to use them, then it's at least a Teen rated fic.

Content Tags (AO3):

Finally, we come to content tags.  These pose an interesting question, because you can tag literally anything here.  Your goal here should be to pose the more technical side of your summary – talk about plot points and devices here, not there.  FFN doesn't give you that liberty, so you should take advantage of it.  

What to put in your content tags:

Tropes:  People search for things like “Soul Bond” or “Time Travel” all the time.  You should absolutely be tagging these things, because they will attract your target audience to your story.

AUs: For all of the college and high school AUs out there.  Not a bad idea to tag “AU – Canon Divergence” or “AU – Alternative History” if and when they apply.

Trigger Warnings: AO3's content warnings don't cover everything.  You should tag specifications for general warnings, things like self-harm and bullying, and generally darker content.

Sexual Content: Tag your kinks, folks.

Alternative Relationship Tags: This is mostly personal preference, but I think tagging things like ship names should happen in the content tags, not the relationship tags. For example, my OTP has five different ship names and I tag them all, but I only put the “Character A/Character B” in the relationship tags.  Again, remember that the gray can be super distracting and should be minimized.

Genre: Basically, follow the same Genre process as FFN or tag some more specific subgenres. Great examples would be tagging “Noir” or “Steampunk.”

Other Keywords: Most things should have been covered by the others, but any important one to three word descriptors can be added to.

What Not To Do:

Long Tags:  No tag should ever be more than four words, unless it's something Canon specific.

Tumblr Tags: The tags are not a place for your meta thoughts.  Throwing a “omg i need more coffee” or a “bumblebee is literally the cutest thing ever” says the same thing as the classic “I suck at summaries, read anyways.”

“I suck at summaries, read anyways.”: We've established this.  If you tell me you suck at writing or “Why Did I Post This,” I will take your word for it and avoid your story.

Unimportant Tags:  If it's not important to the story, don't tag it.  So simple.

The discourse from the last post was amazing and a lot of people brought up awesome points.  What's your personal tagging philosophy?

Thank you all, Allie

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[theteenagetrickster]

21 Savage's R&B Love Affair Is A ReflectIon Of The Evolved "Gangster Rapper"

In November of 2019, artist 21 Savage spoke to hundreds of Atlanta students about the dangers of gun violence. The speech was part of Fulton county’s “Guns Down, Heads Up” program. An initiative to curtail the rising number of illegal firearms in the community. During a local news feature, he explained that urging area youth to be wise in not resorting to guns was his mission. However, his single “Immortal” which was released just 20 days prior had a different message. “Brand new Mac-90 with the drum attached, you a shit talker we got drums for that. Tryna fist fight boy you dumb for that. You gone catch a bullet in yo long for that.”

Can a hardcore rapper grow as a person, as a man, as a member of his community - yet still let his music promote the darkness of his past? 

What happens when a man with a troubled past embraces his mortality and refuses to wallow in the same mentality that resulted in the very pain he once sought to escape?

Is society receptive to the duality of a black man finding the silver lining in his suffering, dealing with the convolution and weight of surviving life in the hood? 

If you never cared to learn more about 21 Savage you may have these and other questions. Yet, given the effort, you’d quickly find that the man behind the microphone is more complex than can be understood simply by taking his music at face value. It requires a fair analysis of the environment in which he was born. The environment he references in music. Through his words, though sometimes corrupt, Savage has constructed a platform. In the 27-year old’s maturation, he continues to use that platform to make a change, perhaps the only way he knows how. This while still healing from a past that likely haunts him.

Patrisse Cullors, Co-Founder of Black Lives Matter presents 21 Savage with an award at the NILC Courageous Luminaires Awards, October 2019 - Jerritt Clark/Getty Images for NILC

In an interview with Genius, 21 Savage said, “Words are powerful. You have to be mindful of how you use them. I’m a rapper, so yeah, I’m going to rap about certain shit - but that’s entertainment. That’s music. That’s my past life. When it comes to what I’m doing in these streets as like a man. Fuck a rapper. Just me as a man and what I stand for, don’t throw dirt on that because that’s like a big accomplishment.”

21 Savage leaped onto hip-hop’s proverbial stage, the light finally shimmering on a sound once dimly lit in almost hidden crevices of SoundCloud. If The Slaughter Tape catapulted Shéyaa Bin Abraham-Joseph onto that stage his soon-to-follow EP Savage Mode was the crowd surfing frog splash off of it. The hip-hop community had embraced him. Each project he’s released since has pitted him deeper and deeper into the modern-day pop-culture lexicon. The Slaughter Tape featured a hardcore, gritty production style, heavily fleeced with 808s and a dark ominous undertone. Listening to the early Savage catalog feels like you’re walking into the belly of the slums. His menacing voice and catchy ad-libs rattle your eardrums from start to finish as he uniquely tells his story.

Back in the early days of his emergence, 21 Savage was lauded for his hardcore street, oftentimes violence ladened lyrics. Praising the gang lifestyle and endorsing problematic behavior. Behavior young men feel forced into because of the realities of living in a socioeconomically challenged neighborhood. As time fell through the hourglass on 21 Savage’s career, his tune has started to shift. Both in his outward demeanor and in his music. Perhaps it even softened.

On his most recent album, I am > I was, he goes in-depth about the tumultuous relationship with his father, losing loved ones and the pain of heartbreak. As the title would suggest Savage’s second studio album signifies a turning point in his life. Seeking to be a better artist and a better man than he once was. For his endeavors in proliferation the rapper was rewarded with a Grammy nomination for Rap Album of the Year.

“I just feel like I’m becoming a better person. My music is just getting better. Learning the game better, learning how to move, learning how to create - everything’s just growing.”

 “I might rap about a lot of stuff, but that’s just a reflection about what I’ve been through. But in real life, everything I do is positive.” 

For someone who has been through so much, it’s great to see a man able to freely express himself. His ups and downs. Both his unrestrained joy and his pain. On a 2018 Breakfast Club interview, Savage admitted that “sometimes he cries” when reflecting on the passing of a friend. DJ Envy followed his statement up by saying “the fact that you said you cry is good because a lot of people will never admit that they cry.” The Atlanta-raised rapper then says “That Jeezy and Keisha Cole song, "Dreaming," I don’t care where I’m at if that song comes on I’m going to cry.”

It was here that we realized 21 Savage, like many of us, uses music to mend emotional scars - which would explain his love affair with singing R&B. Music often acts as an emotional ointment, just as 21 Savaged described in this interview. It helps us to process our traumas. For black people, music is sometimes the only therapy we ever had. In many cases, it is the only way we were able to process the things we went through. Have you ever been to a party or a gathering and that classic R&B song plays that calls up so many emotions? We, as African-Americans, don’t simply experience music - we escape into it. Losing ourselves in the words and the melody. Hoping for a momentary fix from reality. For black men, we deserve the chance to be free of the stereotypes that chain us to a nonexpressive mascot-like existence.  

21 Savage at his "Hot Boyz" Birthday Bash, October 2019 - Carmen Mandato/Getty Images 

In the same interview, Savage admitted that he had been to therapy. Imagine a 90’s gangster rapper talking about therapy in a radio interview. As we’ve become a more conscious and progressive community in hip-hop, much of the facade has melted away and we accept these men as human beings who have experienced real things that take a toll on them - not these beacons of hyper-masculinity. We see evidence of this in today’s “gangster rapper.” 

Savage speaks on this candidly in his writings:

“I done did a lot in these streets and that’s facts. PTSD like I came from Iraq.”

“I lost all my friends countin' bands in the Bentley coupe

Diamonds on me doin' handstands, Rosé on my tooth

If she wanna dance, let her dance for the money, ooh

I don't need no friends if you really wanna know the truth.” 

In the Summer of 2018 Savage began frequently posting himself singing on Instagram’s Story feature. He sang everything from The Weeknd to R. Kelly to SWV. Bellowing his heart out. The selection a testament to his wide range of musical tastes. This past Summer the rapper claimed “I’m singing R&B this time on tour,” in an Instagram post. Savage stated that singing clears his mind. So, these internet karaoke sessions may be part medicine, part liberation. Signs of his internal cultivation. 

Men are freer now to express themselves. To be open with their feelings and show a softer side. 21 Savage is an example of this. We as a society have moved toward allowing men the opportunity to be human. To be tender and vulnerable creatures, while still endorsing their masculinity. Breaking down the barriers of masculinity has been tougher than knocking down the Berlin Wall within the tribe of hip-hop. Misconceptions of male identity have long contributed to a hyper-aggressive culture of male behavior. Many times men are incredibly pensive because they’re asked by society to partake in this play where their role is merely the beast. 21 Savage's exterior may present a hardcore gangster rapper. Now we’re seeing a softer side of Savage. Growth is the companion of time and 21 Savage isn’t the same person that scrapped and crawled his way out of the trenches. He’s a greater version of that.

21 Savage’s journey exemplifies the dichotomy that exists in rap. He wants desperately to help his community and his actions show that. But his music is still filled with violence and belligerence. The Grammy nominee’s infatuation with R&B is a sign that he’s torn about the content in his music. On one hand, it propelled him to stardom, on the other hand, it goes against the things he seems to stand for. But the stories in his music make up who he is. Without the horrors of his past, Savage may not be here to share the journey.

Savage takes his fandom of R&B to the next level by more frequently singing on his music, too. Issa Album explored this on tracks "Facetime" and "Special." In "Special," thanks to auto-tuning, he gifts us with a silky vocal arrangement. On his 2019 album, I am > I was, 21 Savage had a few tracks on which he sings in a contemporary R&B style. He later hopped on several prominent R&B remixes; Jhene Aiko's "Triggered," a song in November with Alicia Keys and Miguel titled "Show Me Love," as well as Normani's "Motivation." There may be more of an audience for 21 Savage ballads than there were for former generations of gangster rap. In what many call the golden era of hip-hop, for two decades, gangster rappers really carried the genre. But I would argue, few of the most influential artists in the past 10 years have been hardcore rap artists. Gangster rappers have had to evolve and adjust with the times in order to survive. 

21 Savage isn't alone either. Other rappers known for abrasive style and content like NBA YoungBoy and Kodak Black are showing their more vulnerable sides nowadays. Last year Kodak released HeartBreak Kodak, a project filled with songs of love's enmity. HipHopDX called the album "808s & Heartbreak meets the trap." Needless to say, it was heavily R&B influenced. NBA YoungBoy made waves with his release of "Dirty Iyanna," Michael Jackon’s "Dirty Diana" reimagined. The track features YoungBoy singing feverishly in auto-tune under the iconic baseline. Social changes and advancements in technology have made creatives that never would’ve sung in generations past empowered to give it a shot.

21 Savage gives out a plate of food during his YMCA Thanksgiving Dinner, November 2019 - Prince Williams/Wireimage/Getty Images

It's a proverb of the duplicity that exists in hip-hop and the evolution of the "gangster" rapper. Savage has several different community initiatives where he focuses on giving back. From hosting charity dinners to giving away school supplies in his old neighborhood. After his run-in with ICE and threat of deportation, Savage is now even advocating for immigrant children. It also highlights the line between art and reality. To quote 21 Savage one final time, “This is art, so how the fuck you gone tell me how to express myself - it ain’t no right or wrong way to be a hip-hop artist.”'

If you liked this, check out:

This content was originally published here.

[lubdubsworld]

The Perfect Husband ( Jung Kook / OC)

Genre : Romance/ Drama/Violence

Rating : 19+ ( all the eleven year olds reading this, honestly stop :’( i don’t want your corruption on my conscience ) 

WARNING : This is literally every fanfic ever written. LMAO. Honestly, it’s so cliche, you’ll probabaly cringe through it. But I wanted to indulge my own love for TSundere , violent Jung kook )

WArnings : Abusive relationship. ( the hero IS VIOLENT WITH THE oc   but domestic violence is a serious issue so if an abusive hero triggers you, STAY AWAY. ) 

Pairing : Jung Kook/ OC 

Chapter 1

"Blue. I like Blue."

Mrs. Jeon stared at me , condescending judgment written all over her perfect face and I shifted nervously.

Just a minute ago she had asked me what I thought about possible color schemes for my wedding to her son.

I'd answered the question honestly but apparently, honesty wasn't always the right answer. My mother , next to me in her brand new ruby red dress which had cost a whopping 5000 dollars, elbowed me sharply in the ribs. I had no idea what to do or say anymore. After a day of shopping with my prospective mother-in-law, the richest woman in the country and my mother, the most pretentious woman in the country, I'd lost all hold on reality and myself. I wanted to peel off the green georgette dress I was stuffed into , slip on my favorite worn t-shirt and shorts and just curl into a corner and sob.

"That's... interesting." Her eye twitched ." I was thinking something more classy." Mrs. Jeon wrinkled her nose.

"How about champagne?" My mother simpered and I blinked. Were we talking about drinks now? When had the subject changed?

"Well, champagne colored fabric would stain very easily.... I suppose I'll have to discuss this with Kookie... " She sighed in long suffering and I grimaced. Good luck holding a decent conversation with that prick, I thought miserably, wanting to sink into the ground and never rise.

"You could ask him, Reumie...  You both share classes don't you?" My mother waggled her eyebrows and I floundered. If I went within five feet of Jeon Jung Kook, THE Jeon Jung Kook I'd be torn to bits, if not by the monster itself, than at least by the legion of fangirls who followed him like bitches in heat. I mean, okay the guy was good looking but the ridiculous extent to which they worshipped him was enough to make me blanche.

Which made the very prospect of me marrying him, something like a death sentence. I was going to die, there really was no question about it? Who cared if I wore blue or champagne on my wedding day? I'd be buried in black anyway.

"Do that then. And call me tomorrow. Without fail." Mrs. Jeon said firmly and I groaned. I'd never spoken to Jung Kook before. Not even once. He hung out in a completely different crowd in our college, the elite crowd. I mean, the more elite crowd seeing as my entire college was filled with rich kids. I wasn't an exception. My father had recently patented a bunch of stuff that had earned us a lot of money in a short time. So i was, what the kids in my college called, new money. And apparently, Jeon Inc., had taken notice of my father's suddenly booming business and where willing to invest , provided I married their son. It was simple really.

Mr. Jeon wanted my father's company to pass on to Jeon inc., after my father and since i was the only daughter, if I married Jeon, a merger would be inevitable. I didn't want to marry him but I didn't really know how to stop the dominoes crashing down around me. I'd protested verbally and my father had threatened to disown me. And while the thought of going out of my home, making it big as an artist, all by myself was very cool-sounding, I didn't really dislike my parents. I liked them, loved them even on somedays and i would never put them, and myself through that kind of emotional stress.

My parents had never been cruel. They treated me well, loved me in all ways and while my mom could be a bit over the top in her need to fit in with high class society wives with more money than sense, she was still a nice lady. Shallow but nice.

When we reached home after bidding Mrs. Jeon goodbye , I found my father sitting in his study. He smiled vacantly when he saw me.

"Reumie... How was your day?" He said blankly, returning to flip through his files. I bit my lips and went over to him.

"Father, can i still stay here at home, after I marry Jeon Jung kook." I said in a rush.

My father startled and frowned.

"Why on earth would you do that?" He shook his head , annoyed.

"Father, my college... i mean the people in my college , if they knew I was living with Jung Kook..." I begged.

"This isn't a private marriage , Reumie. It's a public affair. People are going to know... I've already bought a condo for both of you close to your college. In fact, here's the key, you should go check it out with Jung kook when you meet up with him. " He hesitated and stared at me. " Jung Kook is a bit introverted. You have to be the one to reach out to him, alright? Don't be your usual rude self and act nice. Have you met him for coffee?"

I stared in mute rebellion. I'd never spoken a single word to Jung Kook.

"I'.. I will." I said finally defeated.

"Your mother was telling me you were supposed to discuss the decoration color scheme with him as well. Go see the condo, get coffee, discuss about your wedding and go meet your mother in law tomorrow. Don't mess things up for me, understand?"

Apparently, no one was on my side. I couldn't put it off anymore. I would have to go talk to Jeon Jung Kook.

~~~~~~~~

"Talk to him? Really? He'll bite your head off." My best friend Soyou grimaced glancing over at Jeon Jung Kook who had an arm wrapped around his latest flame. She was so tall she nearly went past Jung kook himself who was freakishly tall as it was. She was also unnaturally beautiful, i thought with a grimace. I couldn't quite understand the obsession with the perfect features that plagued all my classmates. Apparently, looking normal was a crime. They spent millions on their face tweaking every perceived flaw till all of them pretty much looked the same.

"I don't really have a choice." I said softly, glancing down at the keys to the condominium in my hand.

"Well you could at least wear something nice..." Soyou grimaced glaring at my choice of outfit. I spluttered in indignation. I was wearing a black men's shirt and skinny jeans. What could possibly be wrong with that?!

"Are you serious?" I rolled my eyes.

"Everyone knows Jungkook hates girl who wear shirts."

Why on earth would someone hate shirts??

"Honestly, I'm supposed to dress for him, now?" I said wrinkling my nose in distaste.

"If you're going to marry him, then yes." Soyou pointed out.

I frowned deeper.

"you're useless. Anyway, it's not like i can actually go buy a dress just to talk to him. My dad will kill me if i don’t talk to him today.” I swallowed a bit and casually glanced at Jung Kook who was standing a good fifteen feet away surrounded by his gang of friends. 

His gaze shifted right then to me and I flinched.

Jeon Jung Kook was beautiful. Well, in the way a man could be beautiful. He was tall, a good foot taller than me and he was lean and perfectly proportioned. Ebony black hair that was always perfectly styled , a face that was absolutely flawlessly proportionate and pearly white teeth. He fairly radiated beauty. It was almost unpleasantly blinding.

I looked away quickly and Soyou gave me a slight smile.

"Still, I'd say you should be careful. He's not exactly known for being nice." She grimaced. I supposed she was right. JungKook and his gang of surly seniors weren't the sort you'd want to mess with.

I hung back after class, my feet aching from how long I'd been standing here, waiting for my fiance to come out of the men's room. He'd disappeared into it a good thirty minutes earlier and I was starting to feel a little worried.

  Did he slip and fall and crack his head on the porcelain sink?

I should be so lucky.

Groaning, but with time running out, I finally gave up and slowly made my way to the carved door of the restroom. I opened it partially and peered in for any signs of life.

"Boo."

I yelped and tripped over my own two feet, the slightly slippery surface making me slide and hit my waist against the granite counter on the side. I stared in surprise when Jung Kook appeared in front, leering in a way that was anything but friendly.

"I was waiting for you... "  He glanced at my hair and then my clothes and then without warning reached out and gripped my chin in a bruising grip that drew a whimper out of me. I clawed at his wrist, trying to make him let go but he  didn't feel a thing. He was hurting me and I was too stunned to process why.

I flinched when he twisted my jaw to the side, seeming to examine my face from all angles.

"Button nose, thin lips, mousy brown hair and boring black eyes. If you're father's such a hotshot, shouldn't he be at least fixing your face before foisting you off on me?" He drawled . I shoved hard at his shoulders and he let go, looking surprised.

"You... " i couldn't form words. My jaw was throbbing so bad and the pain was surreal. No one had hurt me physically before.

"Me.." He mocked, " I'm not into ugly women. So go tell your parents you don't want to marry me." He growled. I just stared at him.

"You rude bastard..." His eyes flared at the insult but I was too enraged to care, " You think I want to marry you... I.."

He snarled and pushed me up against the wall, so hard my bones jarred inside me. I was so winded, i couldn't draw my next breath in.

"You think I'm Prince charming, sweetheart? You think I give a flying fuck about what you want? Newsflash, I don't give a shit what happens to you or your father ... But if you want to live, you'll stay the hell away from me..."

His hand slipped down and to my complete horror, he squeezed my breast so hard that my knees knocked together. His thumb pressed into the tip with painful force and my entire body twisted in violent protest.

"I'm not gentle, in bed or out of it... thin little thing like you...You'll break within an hour.... You don't want that do you??" He said , voice deep and angry and I felt my throat go dry. Good god, was this the same guy who walked around in perfectly pressed shirts and clean cut slacks and ties? Who acted like he was a model student, all perfect diction and grades and polite respect for elders. The so called heir to the biggest conglomerate in Asia.

"Get away from me..." I choked out, trying to wriggle out of his grip but his entire body was pinning me to the wall, his hips anchoring me in place like a millstone.

"I heard you're a virgin..." He grinned and I froze.

"Shut up..." I said not in any mood to listen to what he was about to say.

"Are you sure you want my cock inside you for your first time, babe? It'll hurt ...I won't be kind you know.... " He bit down on my neck and nausea rose up inside my throat like a snake rearing it's head. I wanted to vomit all over his face. I wish I did.

"You disgusting son of a bitch..." I ground out pummeling his shoulders, stunned by how physically sturdy he was. My blows had absolutely zero impact on his body.

"I don't care if you do marry me... It's not like I'll have to be faithful to you or anything anyway, but you...you'd better be careful. I can be a little hard..." He ground his hips into my stomach and i felt my eyes widen when his erection pressed into me. " to get along with. "

Finally he drew away and I sank to the floor , my knees giving out and my jaw throbbing. I was going to have a bruise there, I knew.

"Still want to marry me , princess?" He sneered.

"Go to hell..." I managed to get out. He frowned , reaching out and gripping my wrist hard. 

"Thought so. Now run along like a good girl and tell your parents you want to call off the wedding."

He squatted down and before i could crawl away, his fingers sank into the hair at the back of my head and he yanked me up sharply, making my scalp burn . I whimpered , when he glared down at me, face inches from mine. I tried to dig my nails into his wrist but it was pointless. 

"If you end up being my wife, I don't know what I'll do to you..." He hissed and I stared because his eyes...they weren't dark like they looked but an odd color of navy grey. He let go of my hair and I crawled away till my back hit the wall. I'd never been so terrified in my life.

"If you don't stay away from me, I'll fuck you up. Don't say i didn't warn you!!"

With that he stalked out slamming the door shut behind him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"I won't marry him!! They can drag me kicking and screaming to the altar but I won't!!"I sobbed while Soyou hugged me close as I rocked back and forth on the small cot in her bedroom. She tried to soothe me but my mind was stuck on a state of catatonic shock. The bruise on my chin was an ugly shade of purple and my waist hurt from where he'd gripped me so hard. I couldn't imagine anything worse than being stuck with him permanently. He was a monster.

"Babe, you know it's not that easy...?Maybe you should talk to him..."

"Talk?!" I said shrilly. " He said he'd rape me!! " I shrieked.

"Jesus, calm down..." Soyou hissed and I fought to get my breath back.

"I need your help. " I said desperately and Soyou looked stricken.

"Reumie..."

"there's a bus to Busan at 7.30PM tonight. I have relatives there. My grandparents, they'll ...i mean I could stay with them, in case my parents kick me out when they find out. But I've only got 25000 Won I need some more to get the ticket... You've got to help me..."

"You're running away ? Because of Jeon Jung Kook...That's ridiculous..." Soyou shook her head in disbelief and I groaned in defeat.

"Why won't anyone believe me? He's not the kind of guy he makes himself out to be...i don't... I can't marry him, Soyou he'll kill me." She was supposed to be my best friend. She usually believed, implicitly, anything i told her. But even she wouldn't accept that Jeon Jung Kook had hurt me.

"You're not even listening to yourself. He's just a rich guy from college. Not some sort of a gangster like you're making him out to be. Rape is a crime for heaven's sake. He's not going to do something criminal. He has a reputation to hold. In fact did it strike you that maybe he's just trying to get to you? You do know that the chick he's hanging out with is the daughter of one of your father's business rivals?" She said bluntly.

I froze.

"What?"

"Jiah Lin. That's her name. Her father's been trying to get Jeon Inc., to invest for years now. It's entirely possible that he just wants his girlfriend's father to have a better chance. Maybe if you refuse he'll marry her and her father will get what's rightfully your father's..." Soyou said calmly.

I felt unaccountably foolish.

"You really think, that's it? He was just trying to scare me?" My throbbing chin said otherwise.

"He's shady enough to do that... " She shrugged and i fell back against the bed, thoroughly confused. What was wrong with my life? One part of me absolutely boiled in anger at the way he had treated me. The other more rational part accepted that he was stronger, richer and he had the upper hand. Both parts agreed wholeheartedly that i should stay the hell away from him. But Soyou was right. My father had worked way too hard to reach the position he was in now. He needed and deserved that investment. This deal was important to him, something he had really earned with years of hard work.

"So, I should marry him...?" I said confused. It was still a distasteful thought. Even if the whole violent thing was an act, there was no denying that Jung kook was a horrible guy to get along with.

"you should definitely talk to him. Tell him you know his game. Maybe he'll own up.  Admit it. Then you can decide what to do."

~~~~~~~~~

I almost screamed when I saw Jung kook the next day, leaning against my locker looking like he'd stepped out of some expensive business magazine. I hesitated, debating the pros and cons of walking up to him right now. Finally, I sighed and made my way over , gripping the book in my hand. I would honest to god, whack him with it if he touched me, I told myself.

"Hi...bitch." He said with a sneer and i went stiff. I hated people who used profanities like that.

"Bastard." I shot back and he grinned.

"So feisty. I'd love to break you in properly. In fact, I was thinking, even if we didn't get married, you could definitely use some schooling on how to treat your betters." He drawled.

"My betters? Don't see any, right now..." I shrugged and his eyes narrowed a fraction.

"What's your deal? Do you like getting hit? Why're you baiting me?" He snapped .

I glared.

"I know what you're doing... My father deserves the investment and i won't let you scare me away." I said furiously .

He looked confused for a second and I faltered.

"What the fuck are you on about?" He said looking confused and the look of confusion on his face was too real to be feigned. I felt foreboding rise inside me.

"You want to marry that girlfriend of yours... So you're trying to make me break up with you. Well , I won't... I'm not scared of you..."

He hesitated.

"I have no idea what you're talking about but that last bit is really interesting.. You're not  afraid of me?" He raised an eyebrow and pushed away from the locker. I blinked when he rolled his shoulders and flexed his arms, stretching lightly till his shirt rod up his hips, flashing a sliver of pale white skin.

"You really should be sweetheart. I won't be crossing any lines with you because as far as I'm concerned, there are no lines. Anything goes.... Does that really not scare you??"

He was coming closer and closer and I took a step back.

Run, every instinct inside me screamed.

"I... I'm leaving..." I stuttered out, turning tail and dashing away.

I barely made it a few steps when his arm came around my waist, lifting me clear off the ground as he dragged me back. I started screaming just a second too late. His palm pressed into my mouth, the metal rings around his fingers digging into the flesh of my lips and jaw as he dragged me around the lockers to the abandoned classrooms on the other side. My eyes went wide and my heart nearly gave out.

I tried to bite down on his hand and kicked out wildly but he was so much taller, so much stronger and the grip on my waist was so tight that my stomach felt like it was being ripped apart.

"Look at you... You're absolutely fearless aren't you? It's so bloody infuriating  , seeing you running that pretty little mouth back at me even when I'm twisting and bending you as I wish... It's like you want me to hurt you... is that it babe? Do you get off on me tossing you around?? Does it turn you on, me manhandling you like this??  " He panted and the tears stung , part from anger, part fear and partly from pure agony.

Why the hell was this guy so strong? I kicked out harder but my legs barely hit the floor . He shouldered the door of the classroom open with enough force to send the peeled plywood door rocking against the opposite wall. The brute strength in his movements only terrified me more.

Damn you Soyou!!

He tossed me to the floor roughly and I crawled away on all fours, choking on air as I tried to swallow.

"Get away from me..." I could feel my knees burning with stinging pain. . I glanced down. The floor had apparently been covered by shattered glass shards. Cursing my luck I tried to scramble to my feet only to loose my footing and land hard on my bottom. He looked amused as he stalked over to me.

"Since you're already on your knees, why not show me how good you are with that mouth? Surely, that tongue should be good at something other than riling me up ?? Oppa, could use some loving right now, jagi...." He raised an eyebrow and began removing his belt. 

Bile rose inside me in a rush and I whimpered, moving to get away again and he grabbed me tighter, pushing me up against the wall again before yanking both my wrists together and tying them with his belt . He was tying me up. He was actually tying me up!!

I screamed so loud that my head began to ache and Jung kook swore.

“Shut the fuck up or i’m going to stuff my tie in your mouth!” He gritted out and the violent imagery made me freeze. He knelt over me, straddling my waist and I started shaking as he reached for the first button of my shirt. 

The door to the clasroom slammed open, hitting the wall and startling both of us. 

"Jeon Jung Kook, what the hell are you doing, you idiot??!!"

The loud voice made him pause and I peered over his broad shoulders. I caught sight of an unfamiliar guy with blonde hair, a look of bored distaste on his face.

"Oh, hi Yoongi hyung. Just having a little fun with my little wife." He called out cheerfully and I stared at him in disbelief. His fingers were still half way unbuttoning my shirt. 

He wasn't just dangerous, he was a psychopath.

Thankfully , this Yoongi had some sense.

When he took one look at me , pinned to the wall with my arms twisted unnaturally ,he swore angrily and dragged Jung kook off me. No mean feat that. The other was so much more slender and shorter.

But Jung Kook moved away with a grunt and Yoongi stared at me in curiosity.

"Why the hell would you come here with this son of a bitch? He's not known for treating women right...  " He shook his head in disbelief and I bristled while the obviously older guy loosened the knot around my wrists.

"He dragged me here..." I glared and Jung Kook shrugged.

"She's my wife hyung. The gift wrapped present my parents got me for christmas.I told her to go break up the engagement if she wants to live but apparently she has no self preservation at all. She actually came back looking for me. It's like she can't get enough....  " He leered. I yanked my hand away and pushed Min Yoongi away when he reached for me. He held both his hands up .

"Easy...I'm not trying to hurt you....  What on earth are you doing here by yourself, kid? Get out.." He said with a shake of his head.

I really didn't need to be told twice.

"I'll be coming for dinner tonight. Your parents better tell me they want the engagement broken or I'm coming after you..." Jung Kook snarled the moment I reached the door.

It took me a good hour to calm myself down.

~~~~~~~~~

"Mother, you don't understand..." I pleaded but my mother gave my long hair a yank, trying to get me to stay still while she plaited the strands into some sort of a side plait. It looked ridiculous on me, or so I felt. I wasn't thin and the dress she'd squeezed me caused me to spill out of all the wrong places.

"If he wants to call off the engagement then fine, i won't blame you for it. But we're doing no such thing." My mother said firmly after listening to my account of what happened with growing disbelief. Apparently a 'nice guy' like Jeon Jung kook would never treat women like that and I should ' stop making filthy lies ' just to get out of the marriage.

"But he hurt me..." I wanted to scream the place down but apparently nothing would convince my parents.

When the doorbell rang my soul actually left me for a second.

Hands clenched into fists , I gritted my teeth and stepped into the huge hallway , noting absently that my mom had the house cleaned to a sparkle. When I looked at Jeon Jung kook I momentarily stumbled.

He looked flawless.

Tall, strapping, dressed in perfectly tailored suit with the jacket left open, his shirt a deep purple silky and soft even by sight. His hair was styled to perfection and his long, long lashes made it look like he's lined his eyes with kohl. Twin piercing glittered on his ears and his lips curved in a breathtaking smile, directed at my mother. When he turned to me his eyes narrowed and then widened.

"Jagi..." He purred and i went perfectly still.

What the-

He stepped right up to me and pulled me into a hug and I froze in surprise, the warmth of his body permeating through my dress and setting me on fire. There was no strength behind his hug, just a warm pressure , overflowing with affection and if i didn't know for a fact that he'd dragged me by my hair less than four hours ago , I may have melted into the embrace.

He pulled back and to my complete horror, his palms went to my face, thumb lightly tracing the fading bruise on my chin.The one he'd put there when I'd first met him.

"Oh, what's this...did you hit yourself somewhere??  you should be careful , aegiya...." He shook his head before bending low and actually dropping a kiss on the corner of my mouth. My tongue refused to come unglued from the roof of my mouth. I thought i'd never speak again, my voice completely shocked out of me.

"What do you think you're doing?" I hissed under my breath.

"Being the perfect husband..." HE said, voice husky as he lightly flicked my lower lip.

I bit my lip so hard i almost drew blood.

Dinner was torture.

I was sitting next to him and about half way through, his hand dropped to my knee underneath the table. I couldn't chew the food in my mouth, fear and apprehension building up so fast inside me that I was sure my heart was going to give out. It was clear that he wanted me to mess up. Do something that he could later use against me. He was actually succeeding because i was this close to chucking the glass of wine on his face. But i didn't. I would be the bad guy then and he would likely deny everything and my parents would murder me.

So I clenched my fists and tried to endure.

And then he lightly yanked my dress, till the fabric kept going up and up , past my thigh while I futilely tried to yank the fabric back down, without tearing it.

"Reumie.... what are you doing?" My mother hissed from across the table and I sighed in defeat, taking my hands off my legs. Never put your hands below the table had been my mother's most strict rule and she looked like she was going to explode.

For a few minutes, Jung kook didn't do anything, just let his fingers lie curved around my thighs. I could feel my skin burning up at the unfamiliar touch of male fingers. Just when I started to discreetly pull my leg away, his grip tightened, in a way that made pain shoot right up my muscles. I realized suddenly that he was way too strong for me to fight physically. And if he had a shred of decency he wouldn't use brute strength against a girl, but clearly, decency and Jeon Jung Kook did not belong in the same language.

"Don't move." He said firmly and I gave him a desperate look.

"Don't do this..." I begged , pride long gone. I just wanted him to leave me alone.

But his fingers slipped up my dress, thumb tracing circles on my inner thigh and then without any warning his fingers caught the hem of my panties and tugged it down.

I stood up so fast, I knocked the glass of wine in front of me , the red liquid, staining the snow white table cloth and the peach colored fabric of my dress in one long splash. I stumbled away quickly.

"Excuse me... " I choked out and my mother looked beyond stunned. i didn't wait for her to scream at me, instead turned around and fled right out of the dining hall, up two flights of stairs before stopping in front of my room.

What the hell had i got myself into? And how do I make it stop??

I'd barely managed to close the door behind me  and step in when a polished boot came through the little space, stopping me.

Jung Kook pushed his way into my room and i yelped.

"What the hell do you think you're doing...." I shouted but his palm came down on my mouth, pressing hard and pushing me back till I tripped over the carpet and fell into the bed. HE chased right after, crawling over till he was straddling my hips, glaring at me angrily.

"Didn't you tell your parents you want the wedding called off...??" He snarled and I pushed his palm away from my mouth.

"If you want it called off , why on earth are you acting like you like me ... You're a psycho.." I panted while he rolled his hips against mine, the movement oddly jarring.He had insane control on his body, able to move specific parts of his hips and legs in any way he wanted. It was frightening.

"It looks like you don't mind being married to me... Are you some kind of a masochist?" He drawled, trying to still my thrashing body with firm fingers at my waist.

"They aren't listening...Get off me you monster!! "

He flattened himself on my body and I started suffocating. He was too heavy and my bones were getting crushed, my lungs screaming in agony as they struggled to draw in air against the weight on my chest. I gasped and he mercifully lifted his upper body off my chest , hips and legs still pinning me down while i gulped down some much needed oxygen.

"Your hair is so fucking long....Get it cut..." He snapped reaching out and giving my plait a yank.  

I glared in disbelief.

"It's my hair... You do not get a say in how long it can be..." I spat out angrily and he stiffened.

" You're going to be my wife. Your hair makes you look like a country bumpkin... Get it cut short and styled properly. " He said , finally lifting himself away from me. I crawled to my knees and glared at him. My hair was my favorite part of my body. I loved it. I enjoyed keeping it long no matter how often my mom asked me to have it cut. it was my one true act of rebellion against a society that called me  too smart, too boyish and too stubborn.

I'd be damned if i let him take it away from me.

"If you think I'll jump through hoops, just because you ask me to... you're out of your mind. I'm not one of your brain dead whores..." I snapped.

He went scarily still.

"What did you say to me?"

I willed myself not to balk at the look on his face.

"You heard me..."

"You think... You have a choice? You think i won't make  you jump through hoops, if that's what I want....??" He whispered , glaring daggers into me as he took a menacing step towards me. And then before I even knew what he was doing He reached for something in his boot and yanked it off.

I saw a brief flash of metal before his fingers gripped my waist length plait and yanked it so sharply that I lost my footing and slid right off the bed. A second later the pressure eased and he stepped away, holding about a foot length of my hair.

It took me two seconds to realize that he'd actually chopped my hair off. I let out a shriek of disbelief, grabbing my head, stunned to see that my hair barely fell past my ears now. My entire body began shaking in rage and disbelief.

"You son of a bitch..." I whispered, unable to move.

Angry tears spilled over my eyes while he stepped closer, threading fingers through my messy hair , yanking it a little gently.

"Don't cry.... I hate women who cry..." He said softly, and then he pushed my chin up. " If we are getting married. And something tells me we are...I'd rather you don't fight me so much. Everytime you talk back to me , I want to bend and break you..." He whispered.

I stayed perfectly still, not trusting my own voice. What he'd done had crossed all possible lines . I would never forgive him. Never.

"Get your hair styled. And don't ever tell me I can't do something. "

The door slammed shut behind him.

Author’s Note : As you can guess, i need psychiatric help. Welp. Sorry for your brains. I really am. Let me know what you thought. Okbye. 

[robotlesbianjavert]

*invasive asks, don't have to answer if you don't want* I keep wondering what is the appeal of slasher movies (nothing wrong with them, just not my thing)? I never read The Cursed Child, what's that about and what do you like about it?

these are good questions don’t worry xoxo

a) i can’t actually explain my penchant for slasher movies in a tumblr-wise moral manner, bc obviously slasher is a genre that tends to be filled with shit like fetishization and a demonization of mental illness and whatever else i can’t list it all right now it’s just a very flawed genre.  so i can’t really discuss it on that kind of intellectually moral level - they are very much a guilty pleasure that i feel i’m permitted.

the thing is that they are such a cheesy b-movie genre that it’s hard to be feel supremely guilty about it?  obviously they’ve gained some mainstream focus that necessitates serious discussion about various harmful shit going on, and i could go more into it if prompted and if i consider myself capable, but they are also SO DUMB.  not dumb some are smart-ish but you always know what to expect from them, you can always expect some dumb caricatures to get slaughtered, expect some final girl expy to limp their way to survival, you can expect the build up, and if there’s a surprise then that’s just an extra treat.  i guess it’s kind of cathartic, being able to exorcise some of my more serious anxieties through them, even when they get positively decadent in the blood and gore and sadism

i guess that while i also like horror as a general genre and am super happy to discuss horror films that take themselves more seriously (ie babadook, get out, that kind of stuff i sincerely believe that horror has great potential for commentary that often gets overlooked or underdeveloped), it’s a bit easier to latch onto singular slasher villains fandom-wise (your michael’s and jason’s and i guess the freddy’s altho freddy can go choke) than it is for more concept-based horrors, bc you don’t NECESSARILY have to take them seriously and you can just have some fun with them (altho they do have their place in a serious discussion, like how michael and jason are horrors that stalk otherwise safe environments, or how freddy is literally thematically about violation)

it’s hard to really explain in a justifiable way rather than a guilty-pleasure way, and i can’t really argue that i’m somehow a morally superior person for liking them and i don’t want to bc that’s dumb and exhausting.  they just tend to be fun i guess.

b) okay so what cursed child is about is essentially the relationship between harry and his son, albus severus, and how they are both essentially similar in ways that, coupled with harry’s complicated legacy and upbringing, drive them apart and eventually bring them back together, particularly in their opinions on hogwarts - this results in albus jr attempting to one-up his father via what albus understands as his first failure (cedric’s death) through time travel.  things escalate from there.

honestly i think that cursed child is a really important continuation of the themes and lessons from the main harry potter series in a more grown-up sense, and i really hate how it’s been spoiled on this site by a bunch of dumb spoilers that never fit well out of context.

like part of the problem i think is that a lot of ppl online tend to a) overidealize harry as some sassy angel child and b) try to freeze him at 11-17 years old rather than consider how his adolescent experiences might map onto who is is as an adult father.  so when he says “sometimes i wish you weren’t my son”, they decide to ignore the context leading up to that moment (albus essentially needling and baiting harry and accidentally touching upon triggers relating to his past abuse, and the two of them essentially having two different conversations) and then everything afterwards (harry’s horror and guilt over speaking in a moment of anger and spite, as he was prone to in the main series, and his desperation to protect and apologize to albus in a time where he’s triggered for a sustained period of time and afraid that his greatest enemy is somehow returning), and decide to declare that jkr must not know her own characters if she dares to write harry as a “bad dad”.  as much as ppl like to try and discuss how terrible it was for harry to suffer abuse at the dursley’s, they sure seem to want to underestimate how it affects him in the long run.  and by fuck does cursed child dig into what harry went through with the dursley’s, particularly petunia!  he’s having nightmares about her and this gets discussed and ppl still like to act like this play misrepresents how he suffered!  it’s so fucking stupid!

i guess i also can’t really lie - i initially bought into all the bad hype surrounding the play when spoilers were released, tho i hope in a more muted way than a lot of ppl i followed, and i only really got interested when i read a particularly moving think-piece about snape, and then i knew i had to have it bc i cannot stress enough how snape was One Of Those Characters that i latched onto in my childhood, and how it felt good to be a bit vindicated in the face of how this website trashes him.  also i cried a lot w snape bc it’s such good closure for his character, it helps you understand how his character potentially developed in the light of the main series, and also i got a better understanding of dumbledore too like you got the impression after the kings cross chapter in dh but when he admitted his insecurities re: how he only hurts the ppl he loves in cc?  it literally like blew his character wide open for me, it really helped me piece together a lot of the things i was unsure about with him.  so i also think it provides a lot of retroactive understanding and clarification of the characters that some ppl like to deliberately misinterpret for notes 

also ppl’s complaints about the time-travel plots are fucking stupid to be perfectly honest, esp in comparison to POA.  first off, poa did hint that it’s possible to change the timeline, cc established that we are working with very different time-travel tools than in poa, and thirdly in poa time-travel was a plot device and in cc it’s a thematic device so who even gives a fuck honestly.

basically: i think the play is a vital and important continuation and conclusion of the original series and its thematic elements, and if ppl don’t like then what the fuck ever but at least they can try to dislike it on legitimate grounds rather than things they heard secondhand or deliberately misinterpreted/decided didn’t fit with their headcanon

i can actually talk like.  a lot about this play bc there was a lot of what i liked and what i think tumblr should like if everyone could carefully remove their heads from their asses.  there are a few things i think could have been improved (while i don’t think it was necessarily baiting, i do believe scorpius/albus was a sorely missed opportunity), the play is more positive than it negative and i would kill to see it onstage.  i guess if ppl don’t like reading script it’s fine but honestly i loved the script, but i’m also fairly used to reading script so idk

also it justified my belief that hermione would be an awful teacher and i feel vindicated even tho i have not seen anyone talk about it tbh

also it made my mother cry (in a good way) and she loved it and that’s literally all the assurance anyone should need. my mom’s a good person and everyone should trust her.