#how am I supposed to sleep at night knowing what I know...

[pbaz7]

SOFT SPOT: CHAPTER 6

paige x azzi

warning: sexual content

word count: 12k

a/n: this was originally like 8k words but the wings made me stress write for the rest of my saturday so we made it to 12k lmao. this chapter is just the rest of their lil cabin trip so enjoy 🤭. let me know what you think of the chapter if you can and feel free to let me know anything you’d like to see or if there’s any typos <3

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Azzi blinked once, twice, five too many times against the morning light that seemed to be blinding her from the cabin windows. The spot next to her was empty and the only evidence that Paige had even been there was the faint scent she left behind on her pillows. It felt way too early to be awake on an off day so Azzi laid there for a few extra moments absently trailing her fingers over the space Paige had occupied however long ago. With real rest finally behind her, Azzi could understand what she felt last night more clearly. She had a gnawing ache in her chest, an uneasy flutter in her stomach every time Paige so much as looked at her.

She’d been in flings before, very casual relationships that never asked for much more than a familiar person to sleep with. But whatever the hell she felt for Paige lived under her skin, in the small crevices of her brain. Paige had a way of setting her pulse off rhythm by just existing, of showing up in her thoughts when Azzi was doing something as simple as drinking a smoothie. These thoughts had a way of making her throat feel like sandpaper and gave her a hollow ache behind her eyes because she knew they weren’t anything…technically. Not yet at least.

She was sure Paige felt something for her. She just didn’t know if it was a simple attraction, if she was lining up to be in another casual relationship because trying to read Paige was like trying to catch a reflection in moving water.

Eventually after growing tired of her own thoughts, she rolled out of the bed with a soft groan, grabbing her sweater on the way out of Paige’s room. She walked quietly back to the guest room she was supposed to sleep in, brushing her teeth and pulling her slightly tangled curls into a low bun.

When she made her way downstairs, the living room and kitchen were empty with no sign of Paige.

Azzi grabbed a banana from the counter before slipping out the back door, the crisp morning air nipping at her exposed legs as she made her way around the side of the cabin. When she reached the gym she heard what was becoming a familiar sound of Paige hitting a bag.

She pushed the door open and sure enough Paige was standing in front of a hanging bag as she moved through precise movements. All of them were thrown with the kind of control that reflected just how much time she put into her craft.

Azzi leaned silently against the doorframe as she ate her banana, letting her eyes wander over the scene. Paige’s hair was pulled up haphazardly, a few damp strands clinging to her neck, her shirt clinging to her torso. She moved like the world faded away when she was training, like her and the bag were the only things in existence.

When she was done with her banana Azzi tossed it in the nearby trash can and pushed off the doorframe. “Weren’t we just here less than twelve hours ago?”

Paige glanced over with her breath coming steadily but a little heavy, sweat trailing down her temple. She gave a small shrug in response, letting her knuckles connect with the bag again.

Azzi tilted her head. “You good?”

“Mmm,” was all Paige offered, her gaze drifting back to the bag as if it held answers she still needed to knock loose.

Azzi stepped closer moving around to the far side of the bag. She placed her hands on it, steadying it as Paige was about to throw another combo.

“I wouldn’t suggest that,” Paige said, pausing mid-motion.

Azzi raised her eyebrow, keeping her hands where they were. “What, am I gonna mess up your rhythm or something?”

Paige shook her head, a small chuckle escaping her. “Not tryna hurt you.”

“How would I get hurt just holdin—”

Paige stepped forward slightly, pressing her hand against the bag so it pushed into Azzi’s hands. Her gaze dipped, nodding toward Azzi’s shooting hand.

Azzi glanced down, noticing how her wrist was bending awkwardly under the pressure.

“If I throw a hard elbow into the bag, like I was about to,” Paige said, her eyes still on Azzi’s wrist, “it’ll fuck that up real quick. You’ll feel it in your elbow too.”

Azzi slowly pulled her hands back, lifting them in surrender, and Paige gave a small smile before turning back to the heavy bag. The sound of her hits continued immediately after.

Azzi watched her for a moment before asking, “Why are you in here so early?”

“I fought like shit.”

Azzi leaned against the wall, folding her arms across her chest . “How so?”

Paige’s fist sank into the bag.“They knew I watched tape,” she said between strikes. “So they made the fight unpredictable. Switched up every round. Took me too long to find a rhythm.” Her right leg snapped up into a sharp kick. “My footwork was slow. Escape time was off. I wasn’t reading her tells quick enough and got a fuckin concussion cause of it.”

Each of her sentences was punctuated by a harder connection to the bag—frustration dripping into every maneuver. Azzi pushed off the wall, a little unease growing in her chest as she approached.

“I wasn’t sharp,” Paige said, her voice low this time, almost like she was just speaking to herself. “I should’ve seen it coming.”

Azzi stepped behind the bag again, gently placing her hands on both sides, hoping Paige would register her in time. She caught the subtle flicker in Paige’s eyes just before her next punch landed as she halted mid-swing, breathing hard, eyes moving up to meet Azzi’s. “Azzi, I just told you not to do that.”

Azzi made sure her voice was soft when she spoke. “You know there’s no such thing as perfect, right?”

Paige stared at her for a moment with sweat glistening along her eyebrows. Her jaw was tight, her knuckles most likely red underneath her gloves.

Azzi tilted her head to the side slightly. “You’re allowed to mess up. You’re allowed to be human.”

Paige exhaled through her nose, shaking out her hands. “Doesn’t mean I have to like it.”

“I’m not saying you should,” Azzi said, keeping her voice soft. “I’m just saying don’t beat yourself up for not winning every second. That’s not what makes great people great.”

Paige looked away for a moment, wiping her neck on the towel nearby with her jaw tight. She didn’t respond to Azzi’s words, her breath still coming out in short, controlled bursts.

Azzi smiled as she watched Paige process her words. To soften the moment she added, “You look kinda good when you’re brooding and all that, though. But that’s beside the point.”

That earned a huff from Paige. “That so?”

Azzi shrugged. “I make it a point not to lie to people who can knock my head off.”

Paige cracked a faint smile, but it didn’t reach her eyes. She tilted her head a few times, still trying to bring herself down from the frustration humming in her muscles. When it didn’t work she sighed quietly. “Can you move for me?” she asked, not unkindly but edged with a slight tension. “I gotta let it out or Imma tweak eventually, and I’m not tryna do that.”

Azzi didn’t move right away, but she gave her a soft look. “You’re not as bad as you think Paige.”

Paige chuckled. “You haven’t seen me pissed off.”

Azzi’s gaze lingered on her, watching the way Paige’s hands flexed at her sides, itching to hit something again. Slowly, she stepped aside. “Okay,” she said softly. “Do what you gotta do.”

Azzi turned to walk away, but before she could take more than a few steps, Paige reached out, her fingers wrapping gently around Azzi’s wrist.

“Thank you,” Paige said, making her voice more sincere than before. “For checking. I’ll come back inside in a lil bit.”

Azzi gave her a small nod, her fingers giving Paige’s forearm a soft squeeze, lingering longer than she needed to. “Don’t stay out too long,” she said before turning and walking back inside.

…

Paige came in about 45 minutes later, her shirt clinging to her skin and her grey shorts noticeably damp with her sweat. She didn’t say anything to announce her presence, just wiped her face with the towel around her neck and made her way into the kitchen. Azzi, who was stretched out on the couch, lifted her head watching her move.

Paige started grabbing ingredients: frozen fruit, almond milk, protein powder. “You want one?”

Azzi nodded, pushing herself up a bit more on the couch. “Yeah, sure.” She stayed where she was, watching the way Paige moved around the kitchen. Eventually, she slid off the couch and wandered into the kitchen, leaning against the counter just a few steps away. Paige didn’t look at her, just kept blending until the machine whirred to a stop.

“Feel better?”

Paige shrugged, pouring the smoothie into two cups. “Well enough,” she mumbled. Her voice was a little horse, like she hadn’t used it at all since Azzi left the gym—potentially letting out a few frustrated yells.

She handed one of the cups to Azzi and finally looked at her. With the way Azzi was leaning on the counter, Paige’s frame loomed a little bit over hers naturally. Azzi took a sip, her eyes on Paige as she tried the drink. She pulled back with a slight smile and a shrug. “It’s alright.”

Paige shook her head, letting out a scoff. “Aight bro.”

Azzi reached out to stop her from moving away, her fingertips brushing against Paige’s stomach only to immediately recoil with a scrunched nose. “You’re sweaty.”

Paige raised an eyebrow, laughing a little. “Observation of the year,” she said before taking a sip of her smoothie. “I just came out the gym, what you expect?”

Azzi wiped her hand on her thigh exaggeratedly. “A towel, maybe? A rinse? Courtesy?”

Paige stepped a little closer, crowding Azzi just enough to make her lean back against the counter again. “You knew what this was, you came in the kitchen on your own.”

Azzi gave her a playful glare. “I came in here for a smoothie.”

“You’re still standin’ here.”

Azzi paused, eyes moving between Paige’s eyes and lips before saying, “That’s your fault.”

Paige’s eyebrow lifted slightly. “How?”

Azzi nodded toward the small space between them, then motioned subtly between their bodies. “This.”

Paige shifted, about to step back, but Azzi’s fingers grabbed her shirt, stopping her.

“Thought I was sweaty,” Paige said, smiling a little.

Azzi’s hand slid under Paige’s shirt slightly, her fingertips resting against damp skin. “You are,” she said. “But now I don’t care.”

Paige's eyes moved down to where Azzi’s hand was resting under her shirt. “Little bipolar, no?”

“Or a woman who’s allowed to change her mind.”

Paige’s lips twitched into a half-smirk. “Fair.”

She looked down at Azzi, her bottom lip tucked in between her teeth a little.

Azzi shifted under her gaze. “Stop looking at me like that.”

“I’m not lookin’ at you like anything,” Paige said. “Just usin’ my eyes.”

Azzi arched her eyebrow. “Exactly.”

Paige grinned, then closed her eyes dramatically, lifting her hands in a phoney surrender.

Azzi snorted, giving her a light shove in the chest. “You’re so stupid.”

Paige stepped back with the push, laughing under her breath. “Assaulting me in my own kitchen for just lookin’ at you is crazy.”

Azzi leaned against the counter again, sipping her smoothie trying to hide that she was a little flustered. “Don’t flatter yourself.”

Paige shook her head, wiping a bit of sweat from her temple with the towel still around her neck. “You started it.”

“No, you started it. Walking in here all...” she gestured vaguely at Paige’s body, “...like that.”

Paige looked shocked. “So what, I’m the problem now?”

Azzi met her eyes, holding the stare. “I never am.”

They stood there with the tension increasing between them. Paige leaned in a little, her eyes drifting to Azzi’s lips purposefully.

“You gonna keep lookin’ at me, or do something?”

Paige swallowed once, then smiled. “You keep tellin’ me I’m sweaty so I should prolly go handle that.”

Azzi took a small step forward, close enough that their chests were touching. “I already said I didn’t care.”

Another small moment passed before Paige took a step back with a grin, heading for the stairs.

“Where are you going?”

Paige looked over her shoulder. “Gotta go shower. Not tryna drench you with my sweat.”

Azzi laughed before mumbling to herself, “Bit late for that.��

…

The rest of the day was comfortably slow. Exactly what both of them needed.

They started with a couple of movies, laying on the couch with Paige’s legs stretched out in front of her and Azzi’s legs thrown over her lap despite the side-eye Paige gave her when she initially did it. Azzi was in charge of picking the first movie and without saying anything put on a romance movie. Paige once again gave her the biggest side-eye known to man, barely holding back a groan as the soft piano music kicked in. She only made it ten minutes in before glancing at Azzi and saying, “This for real what we’re watching?”

Azzi didn’t even look at her. “Shh. Let your heart grow a few sizes.”

An hour later, Paige had to physically bite her lip to stop herself from laughing when she noticed Azzi wiping her eyes. “Yo you crying?”

Azzi sniffled dramatically. “Mind your business.”

Lunch was simple, mostly because Azzi insisted on making it and Paige insisted on doubting it. The moment Azzi put the plate in front of her, Paige squinted at the meal.

“You made me leaves?”

Azzi gave her a look. “It’s arugula, actually.”

Paige poked it with her fork a few times like it might fight back. “Tastes like grass.”

“Keep talking and I’ll go back and add kale.”

Despite the back and forth, Paige ended up clearing her plate, mumbling something about it not being "terrible" after the third bite. Azzi only rolled her eyes and stole a piece of chicken off Paige’s plate.

After that the rest of the afternoon passed with small conversation, a second movie (this one more tolerable by Paige’s standards), and a few hours of simply existing in each other’s space for the first time.

Eventually, as the evening started to creep in, it was time to get ready. Paige had been downstairs for 30 minutes, dressed in simple black pants and a light button-up, her hair pulled into a bun. She was sitting on the couch with her phone, trying to act casual but checking the stairs every few minutes like clockwork.

When Azzi finally walked down the stairs she had on a simple black dress, her naturally curly hair falling around her shoulders, and a subtle glow to her skin from the soft makeup she put on.

Paige did a double take from the couch. Her hand that was draped over the backrest, tensed as her eyes tracked Azzi’s every step.

Azzi noticed her stare almost immediately and raised her eyebrow. “What?”

Paige blinked once then let her eyes roam a little more deliberately the second time. “You’re gonna make us late.”

Azzi glanced at the time on her phone. “I’m right on time.”

Paige finally pulled her eyes away saying, “Not what I meant.”

Azzi caught on, a smirk tugging at the corner of her mouth. “Yeah, okay.”

Paige stood up, brushing her palms over her pants to smooth out any creases. Azzi’s eyes take a slow pass over her, appreciating the fit of Paige’s outfit, the way her button-up hugged her frame, and how that bun had her thinking unspeakable things.

“You clean up alright.”

Paige scoffed. “Alright?”

Azzi just smiled, walking past her toward the door. Paige followed, shaking her head as she reached for the door, holding it open for Azzi to step through, her hand brushing against Paige’s as she passed.

“Not bad at the chivalry thing either,” she whispered, half to herself.

The drive to the restaurant was pretty quiet. Azzi was starting to realize that Paige had her moments. Times when she was more open and willing to talk, and others where she just…wasn’t. This seemed to be one of the quieter ones, so Azzi didn’t press for a conversation. She just leaned into the silence, watching the trees pass.

Every now and then, she’d feel Paige’s eyes on her. It was just quick glances at first, then longer ones once they got off the highway, like she was studying her. Azzi didn’t say anything about it, just tucked the observation away for later.

When Paige finally pulled to a stop they were outside of a small restaurant near the water. The sky was starting to streak in soft pinks and oranges, taking on a sort of quiet glow that made everything feel a little slower, a little softer.

“You been here before?” Azzi asked with her eyes still trained on the building and the stretch of a beach behind it.

Paige nodded, keeping her gaze ahead. “Yeah a few times. Usually during breakfast or lunch when it’s more casual though.”

Azzi hummed at that as a small smile grew. “So you’re really showing me all your spots hm?”

Paige gave a subtle shrug, like it was no big deal that she was taking Azzi to one of her favorite places to go when the world seemed too big. “Just figured you deserved something decent to eat.”

Before Azzi could give a sarcastic response, Paige was already stepping out of the car. A few seconds later, the passenger door opened and Paige was offering Azzi her hand to help her step out. Azzi didn’t need to know that Paige had never done any of this for anyone else. That she actually used to clown Ben when she would see him doing shit like this for Cam.

Azzi took her hand as she stepped out with a smile on her face that she didn’t even try to hide. “You’re committed to this chivalry thing, huh?”

Paige just shook her head before letting their hands drop and walking with her toward the entrance.

The inside of the restaurant was warm and elegant with dim lighting. After checking in with the hostess, they were led through the main dining area and out toward the back. The outdoor patio opened up to an incredible view of the beach and the eventual sunset, the sound of the water soft in the background.

Azzi glanced around as she settled into her seat. “Okay, this is kinda perfect.”

Paige leaned back slightly, her gaze drifting out toward the water. “Told you I’m not a bum.”

Azzi smiled across the table, her fingers toying with the edge of her menu. “So…what do you usually get when you come here?”

Paige met her eyes. “You ordering what I get now?”

Azzi smiled. “I’m just trying to understand you.”

Paige lifted an eyebrow. “Good luck with that.”

The restaurant patio had a dreamlike quality to it. There were soft amber string lights that twinkled overhead, tangled with ivy vines that framed the white wooden beams. A breeze rolled in from the water, lifting the edge of the linen tablecloths slightly and carrying the scent of salt that mixed with the jasmine candle that was lit at the table.

Paige sat comfortably with her elbow resting on the arm of her chair, fingers lightly tapping the stem of her glass. She didn’t say much to start, just watched Azzi; her curls blowing slightly when there was wind, her eyes shifting across the menu.

When Azzi looked up she caught Paige looking but didn’t say anything. “I’m torn. Do I want the salmon or the pasta with—”

“Pasta.”

Azzi narrowed her eyes playfully. “You didn’t even let me finish.”

“You were about to say shrimp pasta. I could feel it.”

Azzi laughed quietly. “Okay, maybe I was.”

“I just saved you some time princess . You’re welcome.”

Azzi rolled her eyes at the comment but ended up ordering the salmon anyway. Paige stuck with the pasta.

As the food and drinks came—just sparkling water tonight . Their conversation grew steadier.

“You said you came here a few times before. You ever just…sit out there?” Azzi asked, gesturing toward the shoreline.

Paige leaned back a little, eyes squinting at the horizon because she didn’t have on her glasses or contacts. “Not as much as I’d prolly like to. When I come here it’s usually quick. Food and go.”

“So never the romantic beach walk?”

Paige gave her a side glance at the subtle question. “A romantic beach walk with myself?”

Azzi smiled but didn’t say anything else on the topic.

They talked about random things. Azzi told Paige how she used to daydream about being a chef when she was younger but couldn’t commit to anything that required her to chop onions everyday without crying. Paige admitted that she tried to learn the guitar but gave up after a few weeks because her fingers hurt.

“You quit because of a little finger pain?”

“My fingertips felt like I was slicing them in half after an hour of practicing.”

“Yeah, but imagine you serenading me today if you stuck with it?”

“No chance,” Paige said, and Azzi laughed, throwing her balled up straw paper at Paige.

Halfway through the meal, Azzi leaned forward looking a little suspicious. “Yours smells better.”

“Because it is,” Paige said flatly as she chewed on her food.

Azzi stared, then leaned forward further, extending her fork toward Paige’s plate.

Paige raised an eyebrow. “You good?”

“Just one bite.”

“That’s how it starts.”

Azzi pouted, giving Paige her full brown eyes. “Please?”

Paige stared at her for a few seconds, fighting a smile, then slowly pushed her plate toward her. “One.”

Azzi tried the pasta and her eyes closed blissfully and a huge grin overcame her face.

Before she could even ask Paige sighed and grabbed Azzi’s plate before pushing hers toward the curly haired girl.

Azzi thanked her and did a little dance in her seat before she started to eat again.

They kept talking throughout the meal and at one point Azzi said something under her breath that was dry and completely unexpected from her and Paige let out a laugh that surprised herself. Not a short snort. Not a chuckle. An actual laugh that sounded completely genuine.

Azzi’s eyes lingered on her after that. “You should laugh more.”

Paige looked at her, still amused and now a little flustered. “Yeah?”

Azzi nodded. “Yeah. It sounds pretty and it looks good on you.”

Paige sucked her teeth as she chuckled. “You’re really pushing it tonight.”

“I mean,” Azzi said, leaning back in her chair and sipping her drink, “I’m calling a spade a spade.”

The sky darkened until only the soft amber bulbs and the fire of the candlelight on the table kept them illuminated. The patio started to thin out as other couples finished their meals, but Paige and Azzi lingered just talking.

By the time the plates were cleared, Paige had moved her chair slightly and sat with her body turned slightly toward Azzi. Azzi mirrored her with her chin resting on the palm of her hand.

They ordered one dessert to share because Azzi didn’t want to eat it alone. It was some sort of lemon tart Azzi picked and they took turns taking bites until it was gone. Paige’s favorite part was watching Azzi close her eyes after the first taste and she told herself Azzi didn’t need to know that she didn’t even like lemon cake that much.

Paige eventually stood and pulled her wallet out, brushing off Azzi’s attempt to split the bill with a shake of her head mumbling about not being stupid.

“So that’s how it’s gonna be?”

“Pretty much,” Paige said.

Azzi shook her head, standing to go back through the restaurant to the parking lot, but Paige reached out and gently caught her by the wrist nodding her head toward the beach.

The smile on Azzi’s face was impossible to hide. “Seriously?”

Paige gave a small shrug. “Figured you mentioned that walk on the beach for a reason earlier.”

Azzi smiled at that and Paige crouched slightly, motioning for her to step out of her heels. Azzi placed her hands on Paige’s shoulders for balance, stepping out one foot at a time. Paige put both of the shoes in one hand and helped Azzi step off of the patio.

“You’re romantic,” Azzi said as they started walking along the shore.

Paige chuckled. “Am I?”

Azzi nodded, slipping her hand into Paige’s and lacing their fingers together.

Paige glanced down at their hands, raising an eyebrow like she was about to make a comment about it but decided against it. Instead, she let her thumb gently graze the side of Azzi’s hand as they walked.

The beach was quiet at this hour, only a few scattered lights from distant houses and the moon casting a shimmer on the waves.

“So what do you usually do after a date?” Azzi asked.

“I don’t usually do dates.”

Azzi looked over, genuinely surprised. “Really?”

Paige side-eyed her, the corner of her mouth lifting. “Why do you sound surprised? Have you met me?”

Azzi laughed, thinking about it. “Fair,” she conceded. Then, a little quieter, “You’re just…you. So it’s a little surprising.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

Azzi shook her head, grinning. “I’m not giving you the satisfaction of answering that.”

“Whatever,” Paige mumbled, but she was smiling as they walked along the sand, the silence between them easy.

A minute passed, filled by the sounds of the waves. Then Azzi asked out of nowhere, “What’s the hardest you’ve ever been hit?”

Almost instantly Paige's brain rewound to the moment. “Shit,” she said, shaking her head laughing a little. “I was out with Cam and them. I feel like I’m always getting into some shit when I go out with them… Anyway I don’t even remember what had me pissed off that night. Just one of those nights where somebody blinking at me was pissing me off.”

Azzi’s eyebrows lifted at this information.

“I was tryna stay to myself, just vibe,” Paige went on, “but this dude kept talkin’ shit. Just chirpin’ in my ear, So of course, I get up.”

“Of course,” Azzi echoed, biting back a smile as Paige tells the story.

Paige gestured with her hand holding Azzi’s heels like she was reenacting it. “I didn’t even get to him. Bro met me halfway and rocked my shit. I mean, like, fully body weight rocked my shit. I barely saw it. Whole night turned sideways after that.”

Paige shook her head as she thought about it. “I blacked out after that…not like passed out, but I just tweaked. Next thing I know, Cam and Rae are dragging me off him and Cam’s yelling in my ear about how I’m going to get arrested.”

Azzi burst out laughing. “You beat his ass?”

“Unfortunately,” Paige said. “I don’t even remember connecting the first hit, just remember how quiet it got after.”

Azzi leaned into her a little bit, still laughing. “I’m so glad I’m on your good side.”

Paige gave her a look. “Are you?”

Azzi glanced down at their linked hands, then back up at her with her eyebrows raised.

Paige shook her head at that, laughing a little. “I got hit with a lawsuit after that night, though.”

Azzi’s eyebrows shot up. “Seriously?”

“Mmhm.” Paige nodded. “I settled before it went too far though. Dude didn’t want his face all over social media”

Azzi tilted her head. “How much?”

Paige shrugged. “Like sixty grand, I think.”

Azzi blinked. “You think?”

“It was a long time ago.”

“Have you had any more like that?” Azzi asked.

Paige looked over. “Lawsuits?”

“I was thinking more like…blacking out, but yeah that works.”

Paige hummed, thinking about it. “No more lawsuits, thank God. But blacking out? Maybe a few more times. It’s rare, though. Takes a lot for me to get there.”

Azzi nodded. “What kind of ‘a lot’ are we talkin’?”

Paige exhaled, her eyes narrowing like she was filtering through memories. “It’s usually not just one thing. It builds. Pressure, fatigue, frustration…being misunderstood. Feeling cornered.” Paige pauses for a moment before saying, “I can deal with all the physical shit that comes with fighting but I struggle with the silent stuff that creeps in.”

Azzi let that sit between them, then asked, “So what do you do now, when you feel it…I don’t know…building?”

Paige looked down at their hands again, thumb brushing lazily over Azzi’s knuckles. “I’m still figuring it out. Some days I just hit the bag until I damn near can't feel my hands. When that doesn't work I come here to Minnesota, try to recenter.”

Azzi nodded at that saying, “That's healthy-ish. Well at least the coming to Minnesota part.”

They walked a few steps in silence before Paige nudged Azzi with her shoulder. “You ever black out?”

Azzi grinned. “Emotionally or legally?”

“Dealer’s choice.”

Azzi laughed. “Emotionally? I’m sure. Usually when I let things build, kinda the same as you. But legally?” She squinted at Paige. “I’d probably cry if someone sent me a letter with the word ‘lawsuit’ in it.”

Paige bumped her again saying, “Of course you would. We gotta toughen you up, princess.”

Azzi looked appalled at the thought. “Toughen up and princess don’t go together.”

“Yes they do. Ever seen a pissed-off disney princess in one of those sword fights? Shit’s crazy.”

Azzi squinted at her. “You’re comparing me to a Disney character now?”

“Depends,” Paige shrugged. “You more Elsa or Mulan?”

Azzi scoffed. “Mulan, easy.”

Paige gave her a once-over. “I can see it. Definitely got some fight in you but you cry at romance movies, so...”

“That’s called being in tune with my emotions.”

Paige snorted. “That’s called soft.”

Azzi squeezed her hand. “Seems like you like that.”

Paige didn’t respond to that, just looked ahead at the shoreline, before a smile she couldn’t control formed and she looked away shaking her head.

Azzi stopped, tugging Paige gently until they both stood still. “Thanks for bringing me here.”

Paige glanced at her, her blue eyes smiling for her. “You’re welcome.”

There was a softness in the way they looked at each other now, like they were more aware of one another.

“So what happens after this?”

Paige shrugged, like she didn’t want to put too much pressure on it. “Whatever you want to happen.”

Azzi smiled. “What if I just wanna keep walking with you for a little longer?”

Paige tugged Azzi with her saying, “Then we’ll keep walking.”

The two of them walked for what felt like hours, their footsteps slow as they talked about everything and nothing all at once. From favorite albums to childhood nicknames, to the most random hypotheticals Azzi could come up with just to hear Paige’s dry responses. The beach completely emptied and all lights turned off, leaving just the sound of the water and the occasional laugh between them echoing into the dark.

Eventually, they started making their way back toward the car, Paige promising that she knew where they were going and that she wouldn’t get Azzi lost. The breeze had cooled enough for Azzi to fold her arms over herself, though she didn’t say anything about it because she was almost positive that Paige would strip out of her shirt just to warm her slightly.

Halfway through the walk, Azzi groaned. “My feet hurt.”

Paige looked over at her, unimpressed. “Thought you were supposed to be an athlete?”

Azzi shot her a glare. “You didn’t tell me I’d be walking miles on our first date.”

Paige snorted, slowing down her pace. “We’re almost there.”

Azzi stopped in place, lifting one foot out of the sand in dramatic protest to ‘inspect’ it. “Define ‘almost.’”

Paige turned toward her, folding her arms as she looked at her. “You’re capable of walking, Azzi.”

“I’m capable of a lot of things. Doesn’t mean I should have to do them.”

Paige sighed like she was fighting a smile. “You’re unbelievable.”

“Thank you,” Azzi said sweetly, extending her arms. “Gimme a piggy back ride.”

“You’re outta your mind.”

Azzi just blinked at her, still holding her arms out.

Paige groaned but turned around, crouching a little. “Get on before I change my mind.”

Azzi lit up, carefully hopping onto Paige’s back, arms wrapping around her shoulders as she smiled. “See? Was that so hard?”

Paige adjusted her grip under Azzi’s legs and made sure she still had her heels secured in her hand before she straightened up. “You’re lucky I think you’re cute.”

Azzi rested her chin on Paige’s shoulder. “I know.”

They walked the rest of the way like that. Azzi’s curls occasionally brushed against Paige’s cheek, and every now and then she’d hum softly under her breath, like she didn’t want the moment to end.

“Hey, Paige?” she said quietly in her ear after a while.

“Mhmm?”

Azzi paused, like she was searching for the right words. Then she decided, “Thanks for tonight.”

Paige gave Azzi’s thigh a gentle squeeze with her hand.

…

By the time they got back to the cabin, the sky was pitch black, scattered with stars, and the wind had grown quieter away from the water.

Inside, the warmth of the cabin was a nice contrast to the outside world. Paige moved on autopilot kicking off her shoes and pulling her hair down from the bun, and heading straight for the shower. Her muscles still ached from being in the gym early in the morning and the hours-long walk, but it was the good kind of tired. The kind that settles in your bones after a day that would be sure to hold memories that you’d look back on.

After washing off the ocean and sand, she tossed on a tank top and boxers. Her voice was already a little horse when she went to go say goodnight to Azzi who was in the middle of taking off her makeup. She offered a soft, “Goodnight,” before going back to her room and falling face first into the mattress.

It was nearly 3 a.m. when the knock came on Paige’s door.

Paige barely opened her eyes this time. Her face was buried deep into the pillows, her limbs felt heavy and unwilling to move so she just yelled out with a hoarse voice. “Come in.”

The door creaked open a second later, quiet footsteps walking across the floor. Paige didn’t lift her head. But she felt Azzi standing there lingering in place.

“What’re you doin’?” Paige asked.

“Couldn’t sleep.”

There was a pause. Paige shifted slightly, patting the empty space beside her without lifting her head. “Don’t stand there like a creep.”

That made Azzi smile as she crossed the rest of the room and slipped under the covers next to her, the mattress dipping under her weight.

They didn’t touch at first. Paige was still on her stomach with her face pressed into the pillows and Azzi laid on her side, watching the curve of Paige’s back rise and fall.

“Long day,” Azzi whispered after a while.

Paige hummed in agreement. “Mhm.”

Azzi starts tossing around for a few minutes restlessly shifting. At first, Paige ignores it, chalking it up to the usual fight to get comfortable after being hot. But when Azzi rolls again, her elbow brushing Paige’s side, Paige groans softly and blindly reaches out, wrapping an arm around Azzi and tugging her back against her chest and tangling their legs.

“Jesus,” she mumbled, her lips moving against Azzi’s shoulder. “You don’t ever stay still?”

Azzi didn’t answer, just exhaled softly. The sound wasn’t so much from her being tired, more so…thoughtful. Her breathing was different from the night before. Less casual. A little heavier.

Paige noticed, vaguely but she was so far gone from exhaustion that her brain wrote it off as nothing.

She kept her arm draped around Azzi, her fingers resting on Azzi’s bare stomach from her only having on a sports bra. Paige’s eyes were already closing again when she felt Azzi subtly pressing herself back into her.

Paige’s eyebrows knit together, even in her half-sleep daze as she tightened her grip on Azzi slightly.

Another few minutes passed. Then Azzi shifted again a little more deliberately this time as she pushed herself back into Paige’s space more firmly. Her hips met Paige’s body with a subtle arch.

Paige blinked a few times, suddenly feeling wide awake.

Her breath got stuck a little. Not in an alarming or surprising way. Just in the sudden rush of clarity. Her arm stayed locked around Azzi’s waist, but her fingers flexed against her stomach slightly.

“…Azzi,” she said softly, her breath warm against the back of Azzi’s neck.

Azzi didn’t say anything right away. She reached down, gently lacing her fingers with Paige’s where they rested on her stomach. Then she whispered a little recklessly, “I thought you were tired.”

Paige swallowed hard, her nose brushing Azzi’s hair. “I was.”

Azzi let her thumb stroke across Paige’s knuckles. “Are you still?”

Paige exhaled through her nose, her eyes were heavy but the rest of her body felt fully awake. She tightened her hold to pull Azzi back into her again, not saying anything but answering.

“I don’t think that’s a no.”

Paige chuckled softly, pressing her forehead against the curve of Azzi’s shoulder. “It’s a ‘don’t start something you not ready to finish.’”

Azzi didn’t answer with words. She reached down and gently guided Paige’s hand beneath the waistband of her pajama shorts. Settling Paige’s hand where her body was screaming for attention. Her core was already warm from the wetness between her legs that Paige felt instantly. Paige’s fingers twitched and Azzi responded by pressing Paige’s fingers through her folds, a soft inhale escaping her lips at the feeling.

Slowly Paige trailed her hand up and used her middle finger to trace small slow circles against Azzi’s clit, each one softer than the last.

Azzi let out a sigh and tilted her head back against Paige’s shoulder. Letting her body melt into her.

Neither of them said anything. There was only the sound of them breathing, Azzi’s having shifted from steady to something heavier. Paige could feel everything, the rise and fall of her chest, the wetness that was growing underneath the pads of her fingers, the tension in Azzi’s body that wasn’t entirely tension but anticipation.

Paige kept her lips close to Azzi’s ear, but didn’t speak. Just allowing her breathing to be another form of stimulation.

Her thumb brushed against Azzi’s thigh as her middle finger continued to move in slow circles learning what got reactions out of Azzi.

Azzi’s breathing deepened and her chest started to rise slower as she took fuller breaths. Each of her inhales drawn out like she was trying to hold it together.

Paige’s hand didn’t move from Azzi’s clit. The way she was moving was patient. The position they were in was intimate in a way that made it hard for Azzi to breathe.

Azzi let out a quiet, broken whisper when Paige added a little more pressure. “That feels good…”

Paige leaned forward, pressing a soft kiss against the crease of Azzi’s jaw. Her lips lingered there, her breath warm on Azzi’s skin as she brushed her nose against Azzi’s neck, before she pulled back.

Azz’s legs somewhat twitched as her fingers clutched the pillow in front of her, then released it, before clutching again.

She shuffled her hips against Paige’s hand trying to feel more of her but Paige kept the same gentle circles against Azzi’s center with the pad of her finger, like she was committed to the rhythm.

Azzi swallowed hard and her breath hitched when Paige’s fingers moved toward her entrance, gathering her wetness before moving back up again. Azzi’s jaw tightened, pushing her thighs together subtly to add more pressure.

Paige felt the tension building in Azzi’s body, felt the way Azzi arched into her hand so she pressed a little more firmly against Azzi’s bud, occasionally grazing her lips against Azzi’s neck and shoulder.

Azzi exhaled shakily. “Fuck Paigie…”

Paige kissed her just under her and whispered, “I know,” dipping her fingers back down causing Azzi to whimper quietly.

Azzi doesn’t know how long Paige circles her clit. Doesn’t know how many times she sucks in a breath when Paige dips her fingers down just to move them back up to perfectly circle her clit again.

The heat initially from Azzi’s chest was lower in her stomach, a pooling sensation that made it hard for her to stay still. Her body kept shifting: her legs tightening together, then relaxing when Paige kissed her skin, her hips pressing forward into Paige’s hand, her breath falling out in uneven, whimpers.

“Shit Paige…” she choked out. The sound made Paige’s lips twitch into a faint smile against her neck as she sucked on the spot gently, tracing it with her tongue.

Azzi let out another whimper, that was louder. She felt flushed and breathless, her thighs were trembling slightly. It only made her wetter when she thought about how close she was to coming undone just from the pad of one of Paige’s fingers.

When Paige saw Azzi’s eyes starting to flutter she pulled her finger away, to cup Azzi’s center with her palm.

Azzi let out a surprised sound at the loss of stimulation her body was aching for “Wait…”

“Trust me,” Paige whispered before pulling her into a slow kiss. Mirroring the way Paige’s fingers were moving, there was nothing rushed about the kiss. Paige kissed her like she knew exactly how to control Azzi’s body, like she was trying to slow down the sensations pulling at her core. Azzi let herself fall into the kiss, let herself breathe through it, even while her center pulsed in Paige’s warm palm.

Paige deepened the kiss, tracing Azzi’s tongue with her own before sucking on it as her hand free hand held Azzi’s jaw in place gently. Azzi moaned against her mouth. Every nerve ending still on the edge Paige left her on, causing every inch of her skin to feel alive.

Their lips stayed tangled for a few minutes that made Azzi feel like she was suspended in time and just when Azzi’s head started to clear, Paige’s fingers moved back to her clit. Starting those same circles with the pads of her fingers.

The contact was barely there to start but somehow it felt more intense than before.

Azzi's breath got stuck in her throat at the reintroduction to the sensation and her entire body reacted like Paige flipped a switch.

“Paige,” she whimpered out as her voice cracked slightly.

“Mhm?”

Azzi tried to swallow a moan by biting her lip as her fingers clutched the sheets. “You’re…so fucking mean.”

Paige chuckled, moving her mouth to brush against Azzi’s ear. “I’m mean?”

Azzi nodded, trying and failing to keep her hips from moving. “Y-Yeah…”

“Mmhmm,” Paige hummed again, her lips grazing the hinge of Azzi’s jaw. “Just from makin you feel good?”

Azzi whimpered at the cockiness she heard in Paige’s voice. Her breath was unsteady, every part of her fighting to stay composed. “You’re not even fucking me—”

“I am fucking you,” Paige whispered, her thumb now circling Azzi as the rest of her fingers dipped down to tease her entrance before moving back up. Azzi moaned at this, trying to press her thighs together subtly.

Paige soothed her by kissing her temple. “You’re doing so good.”

Azzi’s hand reached for Paige’s forearm, squeezing it like she needed it to ground her. Her voice came out desperate as she said, “You’re gonna make me cum before I feel you.”

Paige smiled. “I know. But I got you.”

She kept her same rhythm against Azzi, sometimes with just one finger in small circles, other times she used two, dragging the pads of her fingers loosely, changing the pressure. Each variation pulled something different from Azzi: little gasps, broken breaths, soft moans that Paige accentuated by sucking on her neck gently.

It didn’t take long for Azzi to feel the heat pooling again, this time obviously stronger, her nerves already frayed from the first time. The closer Paige got her to the edge, the more erratic Azzi became, words slipping from her mouth before she could catch them.

“Fuck daddy I—” she whimpered, her voice cracking before she could finish. Her head tipped back against Paige’s chest as she reached behind her to grab at Paige’s head.

“I—” she tried again, the words trailing off again before she finally got them out. “I’m so close—”

Before she could tell her not to stop, Paige’s fingers left her clit again. Her palm cupping Azzi’s center that she felt pulsing beneath her hand.

When this happened Azzi let out a frustrated, helpless sound. Something between a gasp and a whine. Her fingers pulling at Paige’s forearm trying to guide her back, but Paige just kissed the side of her neck gently, her own breathing completely steady.

“Not yet,” Paige whispered, almost apologetically.

Azzi exhaled unevenly before Paige caught her lips in a kiss that deepened far too quickly. Despite the unbearable heat building inside Azzi’s Paige kissed her like they had all the time in the world. She mapped Azzi’s mouth with hers, her tongue sliding every slowly as she controlled the pace of the kiss. She used just enough pressure to keep Azzi on edge without giving her relief.

When Paige pulled back, it was only to drop kisses to Azzi’s jawline, then lower, finding a spot just under her ear that made Azzi squirm. She palmed Azzi’s center with a little more pressure to reward her but she felt the subtleness of Azzi’s thighs pressing together, trying to create any form of friction. Paige knew it was probably involuntary, she could feel the tension radiating off of her body, feel the effort Azzi was making to not fall apart without what seemed to be Paige’s permission

“Stop,” Paige stated simply.

Azzi’s breath hitched. “I—” she started, her voice embarrassingly stuck. “I can’t control it.”

Paige pulled away everything for a second, just long enough for Azzi to feel the complete loss of sensation. Before she lifted her head to brush her nose against Azzi’s cheek. “Yes, you can.”

Azzi whimpered, squeezing her eyes shut as she tried to control the tremble in her body.

Paige’s lips brushed against her ear, “Promise I got you. Just wait a little longer for me gorgeous.” Azzi took a long shaky breath and nodded before Paige reconnected their lips. After what felt like forever tangled in slow, aching kisses, Paige’s fingers returned to their familiar place on Azzi’s clit. Causing Azzi to exhale a sound that was closer to a moan than a breath.

She whispered Paige’s name and her voice cracking around it. The blonde’s name left her lips again and again, tangled with fragmented words and half-formed pleas that made Paige smile against her neck.

“Mhmm?” Paige whispered, pretending to play innocent as she kept Azzi trapped in that unbearable space just shy of her release. Paige shifted her touch subtly, the circles beginning to take on more shape.

At first, Azzi didn’t catch it, too caught in the haze of feeling Paige touch her. But after Paige whispered, “Focus for me,” she realized Paige was spelling something.

G-O-O-D G-I-R-L

Azzi’s body jerked at the subtle praise as she bit down on her lip hard enough to sting, swallowing the sound that clawed its way up her throat.

Paige chuckled softly, brushing a kiss against her cheek. “You like that?” she whispered as her fingers continued spelling it out in firm lazy strokes.

Azzi nodded, unable to speak.

It only took a few more minutes—just a few slow, devastating minutes of Paige circling her clit before Azzi completely came undone. Paige was still calm behind her like this wasn’t affecting her in the slightest. Like Azzi falling apart in her arms didn’t have her boxers soaked.

Azzi’s head lolled back against Paige’s chest, her dazed eyes blinking slowly as her parted lips released soft sounds without her permission. The pressure in her body was unbearable in that beautiful, addictive way that blurred the lines in her brain between someone she wanted and now needed. She felt hot all everywhere, her nerves were stretched thin, her muscles twitching with every circle Paige made with her fingers.

Her body started to tighten again “Please don’t stop,” Azzi said, barely loud enough for Paige to hear. Her tone was gentler this time. It wasn’t tinged with frustration or impatience, just quiet begging like she couldn’t take another second.

Paige pressed a kiss to her shoulder before moving down and easily curling two of her fingers into Azzi, causing her to shatter. Her legs tightened and trembled, a visible shudder running through her body as her breath caught then spilled out in uneven waves as she moaned out Paige’s name loudly. Words tumbling from her lips again and again. Her entire body felt like it was shaking as pleasure overtook her.

Azzi went limp against Paige’s chest, a mess of heavy breathing and boneless limbs, and Paige kissed the back of her shoulder as she kept moving her fingers inside of Azzi’s entrance, her fingers hitting that spongy spot every time she slid them in.

Azzi’s head tipped back against Paige’s shoulder when she added another finger, trying to form words and trying to catch her breath from what just happened. “Shit P-Paige, I—” Whatever she was trying to say got swallowed by the feeling of Paige speeding her hand up, pushing into Azzi at a faster pace as the bottom of her palm smacked against Azzi’s clit.

The contact had Azzi’s body jolting each time, her hips moving to meet the slaps, completely drawn to the pressure as she fucked herself on Paige’s fingers as her eyes fluttered, glassy and dazed.

The way Paige fucked her so confidently, so naturally, it was like Azzi’s body recognized her before her mind could even process what was happening. Azzi moaned as her fingers curled around Paige’s forearm again to hold onto something.

“Too much?” Paige whispered against her neck, her lips brushing the shell of Azzi’s ear.

Azzi tried to answer to say no, but her brain was fogged over and she suddenly didn’t know how to use her words. Her body felt hypersensitive, and each touch from Paige was magnified tenfold after how long the blonde dragged out the first orgasm.

Paige smiled and sped up, her fingers disappearing into Azzi at a faster pace, smacking the back of her palm against Azzi’s sensitive clit each time she pushed into her.

Her breath was warm against Azzi’s ear as she started whispering shit she would never be caught dead saying outside of this room.

“You hear that shit?” she whispered, referring to the sound of Azzi’s wetness echoing around the room. “You so easy for me.”

Azzi let out a shaky sound, her hand gripping Paige’s forearm again. She was barely able to speak, but still trying. “Y-You’re so,” she started, but it came out cracked and she couldn’t finish initially. “You’re so fucking good.”

Paige smiled at the admission. “I’m fucking you good Azzi?”

Azzi arched into Paige as she nodded, her body acting on its own every time Paige’s fingers curled. She was already unraveling again but trying to ground herself to extend the pleasure. “Fucking me so good I can’t even think straight daddy,” she admitted with a strained voice.

“I can tell it's mine already,” Paige whispered as she nipped at Azzi’s neck before soothing the skin with her tongue.

Azzi wanted to deny it, put Paige in her place a little but the way her chest opened at the words had her falling deeper and spilling out more onto Paige’s hand. She couldn’t do anything but let herself start to unravel again.

Paige slowed down and used her thumb to circle Azzi’s clit as she pushed deeper into her at a slower pace, drawing out the feeling each time she pulled her fingers out.

Azzi’s body tightened again as her hips twitched without any control. She let out a panicked sound as her hand flew to Paige’s wrist attempting to stop her. “W-Wait, wait I—” Azzi gasped, trying to shift away from Paige’s hand. “Paigie, I…I think I have to pee.”

Paige caught her wrist easily with her other hand that was under Azzi pulling it away. “No you don’t,” she whispered over the shell of Azzi’s ear before she tugged on it with her teeth. “Just relax for me. You trust me right?”

Azzi nodded her head faintly, as she tried to relax, but she was too far gone. She was too sensitive, too wound up from the hours Paige spent edging her without giving her a full release until a little bit ago. Her head was still spinning from the first orgasm, her legs started trembling again, and her mouth parted around broken breaths.

Before she could process what was happening, Paige pressed her thumb down in a firm, perfect circle just as she curled into the spongy part inside of her core..

White heat shot through Azzi’s entire body, wave after wave that felt like it would never stop, crashing over her so hard it stole her breath and made her arch into Paige’s chest. Her hands gripped blindly at the sheets, Paige’s thigh, Paige’s hair, anything she could find, as an involuntary scream tore from her throat, louder than anything she'd meant to make tonight.

She barely registered the warm, soaked mess that came from between her legs, or the aftershocks that rolled through her like she was vibrating from the inside out as Paige kissed along her neck and shoulder. She was whispering things Azzi couldn’t fully hear, her voice not fully registering against the ringing in Azzi’s ears.

Paige pulled her fingers out slowly, her palm dripping as she rested her wrist on Azzi’s hip, her wet fingers hanging idly in the air as Azzi fought to catch her breath, as aftershocks spread through her body in Paige’s arms.

They laid there for a few minutes as Azzi came back to earth, to catch her breath while her skin was still humming. When she gathered the strength she reached down and slid off her soaked pajama shorts before she rolled on top of Paige, settling her weight evenly as her hands braced both sides of Paige’s shoulders.

Paige blinked up at her, dazed but still trying to be composed as she processed how good Azzi looked up there. “I’m good…you don’t have to.”

Azzi’s eyebrows lifted, her expression teetering somewhere between confusion and skepticism. “‘You’re good’?” she repeated, her voice a little incredulous even repeating the words. “What the hell does that even mean?”

Paige chuckled under her breath, still trying to play it cool. “I’m just saying you don’t have to…We can just go to bed if you’re—.”

As she started to explain, her voice tapering off when Azzi leaned down and took Paige’s hand. The one that had been lying stiffly beside her because it was still coated in Azzi’s wetness and brought it to her lips.

Paige froze.

Azzi didn’t say anything at first, just held Paige’s gaze as she licked at her knuckles, her tongue feeling soft and warm before she let her lips part, taking three of Paige’s fingers into her mouth, her eyes only leaving hers when she closed them and hummed around Paige’s fingers.

Paige swallowed harshly as she watched completely frozen as she looked at Azzi in complete disbelief. Azzi’s lips dragged over each of her fingers, her tongue tracing each finger gently as she tasted herself, and it was like Paige forgot how to think as she watched.

When Azzi was done she placed Paige’s hand down then leaned closer, her lips brushing Paige’s jaw. “I wanna make you feel good,” she whispered, almost purring. “You can let me do that for you, right?”

Paige barely managed a nod as the tiniest most helpless sound escaped her before she swallowed it back. Her blue eyes locked on Azzi like she couldn’t fully believe what was happening.

Azzi smiled at Paige’s dazed nod, already knowing she had her exactly where she wanted her. Suddenly stripped of all that calm composure, completely folding at the slight display of dominance. Azzi slipped off Paige's boxers without much protest before straddling her again.

She pushed up Paige’s tank top, revealing the toned lines of her abs and let her fingertips ghost over the skin first, feeling the way Paige’s stomach twitched at the contact, before she leaned down and kissed just above her belly button.

She moved her lips slowly like she had all night. She kissed and licked at the skin of Paige’s stomach, soothing it with her tongue every now and then when she bit a little harshly.

When she glanced up to watch Paige struggle to hold it together Paige’s head fell back almost instantly at the eye contact from that angle.

Azzi somehow knew and felt that if she told Paige to move, to shift, to breathe deeper or softer or stop thinking altogether, she would do it with no questions asked. Something about that made Azzi want her more. Something about having somebody like Paige submissive for her went straight to Azzi’s head.

“Move your hands for me,” Azzi whispered softly as her lips were still brushing against Paige’s stomach.

Paige listened, raising her arms above her head and resting them against the pillow without a single question.Her hands twitched above her head when Azzi sucked harshly over one of her abs leaving a bright mark.

Azzi’s mouth curved into a grin when she felt Paige’s breath catch. “Mm,” she hummed before softly adding, “Good girl.”

Paige opened her eyes at this. “Watch your mouth.”

Azzi mumbled, “Yeah, okay,” clearly not sorry, and clearly not planning to stop. With that same confidence, she slid her hand between Paige’s legs and Paige’s body welcomed the touch like she had been waiting for it.

Azzi slowly eased two fingers into Paige until her palm rested flat against her center. She let Paige adjust to the feeling, letting her hand just linger there before starting slow strokes of her fingers.

She kept her eyes on Paige’s face, watching every small reaction: the twitch in her jaw, the way her throat bobbed when she swallowed, the way her hands that were still obediently tucked above her head grabbed at the pillars of the headboard.

“Still good?” Azzi whispered, her fingers never stopping their rhythm.

Paige blinked her eyes open slowly, jaw tightening for a second before she gave the faintest nod and closed her eyes again. “Y-Yeah…good,” she said, even though her voice was more breath than sound.

Azzi grinned again and leaned down to kiss just below her ribs, her fingers pushing just a little more firmly into Paige. “Good.” She shifted her weight, moving up until she was fully hovering above Paige looking down at the blonde saying, “When’s the last time somebody made you feel good?”

Paige’s eyes fluttered open slowly and when they did they were dazed. Her eyebrows furrowed as if she genuinely had to think. “I don’t know,” she mumbled.

Azzi cocked her head to the side slightly, as she increased the pace of her fingers between Paige’s legs. “You don’t know?”

Paige shook her head, struggling to keep her voice steady with the way Azzi’s fingers were curling into her. “ No I—just don’t usually. Hasn’t been good, so I don’t usually—”

She didn’t get to finish because Azzi’s eased in another finger pressing, right into that soft ache she was building in Paige’s stomach, causing her to suck in a sharp breath.

“Am I good?”

Paige choked on a short, surprised laugh, her head tipping back into the pillow.

Azzi waited for an answer.

Paige nodded, trying to catch her breath.

“Use your words,” Azzi whispered, ghosting her lips along Paige’s jaw.

Paige’s eyes squeezed shut as she exhaled, already starting to unravel. “Shit…yeah. Yeah you’re good.”

Azzi leaned down, capturing Paige’s lips in a messy kiss. The shift in her weight caused her to press into Paige more and she against her mouth with a broken sound that Azzi swallowed as she deepened the kiss.

When Azzi pulled away, it wasn’t for long as she started trailing kisses down the slope of Paige’s jaw to her neck, her lips brushing messily over the sensitive skin, licking and tasting the salt of her flushed skin from sweating slightly in her sleep. Paige’s head rolled to the side against the pillow.

“God, Azzi…please,” she moaned, not even sure what she was begging for. Her voice had dropped to something a little rougher showing just how far gone she was.

Azzi smiled against her neck, letting her tongue glide and suck over her pulse.

“I never felt…fuck, I’ve never—” Paige cut herself off with a sharp inhale when Azzi shifted her leg pressing her fingers deeper into her cervix.

Azzi pulled back to look at her. “You like this?” she asked, just to hear how Paige would respond.

Paige gave a short, breathless laugh that cracked halfway through. “Yeah shit. Love it. You don’t even know—” Another gasp. “Shit I don’t even know what I’m tryna say.”

Azzi tilted her head, watching her unravel with a soft hum. “If I knew I just needed to fuck you to get you talking,” she said, her voice a little arrogant, “I would’ve had you in my bed a lot sooner.”

Paige let out a low laugh at Azzi’s comment, before it was replaced with a moan when Azzi pressed against her stomach. “I’m close.”

Azzi just smiled softly, pressing into the same spot on her stomach as her thumb moved in slow circles and her fingers curled perfectly. The sensation of all three movements caused Paige’s fingers to twitch near her head as she bit her bottom lip. It only took a few more strokes before Paige was gone, her body tensing under Azzi as she came undone with a harsh exhale, her back arching off the bed. Her eyes rolled back and her lips parted as another quiet “fuck” slipped out along with a few other words that Azzi couldn’t make out as she helped her ride out her orgasm.

When it seemed like Paige was done Azzi pulled her fingers out slowly and eased next to her. After a few seconds, Paige let out a chuckle.

Azzi, now nestled in her side, glanced at her with a raised eyebrow. “What?”

Paige turned her head to look at her, mumbling through the remnants of a grin, “You just bitched me.”

Azzi laughed. “That really wasn’t even that bad.”

Paige shook her head, fluttering her eyes closed again. “Mmm. That’s crazy.”

Silence lingered for a moment as the air between them started to cool down despite their warm skin.

Paige broke the silence with a quiet sigh. “You ruined my sheets.”

Azzi didn’t open her eyes to respond. “We’re not talking about that.”

They just shifted to the other side of the bed that was dry, Azzi maneuvering herself so she was laying halfway on top of Paige, her arm draped loosely over Paige’s stomach and one leg hooked around her thigh.

“I’m just throwing it out there,” Azzi added, “You can’t blame me for what happened. You told me to relax.”

Paige grinned. “Didn’t blame you.”

Azzi propped herself up on one elbow, brushing a few strands of hair off Paige’s forehead. “You kinda did. ‘You ruined my sheets,’” she mimicked. “I’ll buy you new ones.”

“Mm. Make sure you color match ‘em.”

“Obviously.” Azzi grinned and rested her head against Paige’s shoulder again. “You know, for someone who fights for a living, you’re kind of easy to fold.”

That got a small snort out of Paige.

Azzi smiled at the sound, quiet for a second before continuing to talk, “You tired?”

Paige nodded, barely opening her eyes. “Exhausted.”

“Me too. But I still have, like, five more things to say.”

Paige cracked one eye open as she looked down at Azzi. “Say ‘em.”

Azzi sighed into Paige’s neck, “Nah…I’ll save some for the morning.”

Paige didn’t answer this time, just decided to run her fingers along Azzi’s spine in slow lines to settle her down. Sure enough Azzi’s eyes fluttered closed a few seconds later, and the room settled into a peaceful quiet, their breaths falling in sync as the birds outside started chirping.

…

A few hours later Azzi’s body naturally started to stir despite only getting a few hours of sleep. She felt the warmness of someone else’s skin and the tangle of their limbs before her eyes even opened. Bright light filtered through the curtains and it took her a few seconds to adjust. She blinked a few times and eventually her vision cleared enough for her to realize she was still draped across Paige, her cheek pressed against her chest.

Paige was already awake with her eyes fixed on the ceiling and when Azzi lifted her head slightly, her weight shifted enough for Paige to notice. Without looking down, Paige said, “Morning.”

Azzi smiled, her voice slightly raspy. “Good morning.”

Paige didn’t move to look at Azzi and her eyebrows were pinched slightly, something far-off in her expression.

Azzi reached up, gently brushing her thumb between Paige’s eyebrows, smoothing out the crease. “What are you thinking about?”

“My fight.”

Azzi’s fingers paused over her skin. “You think about that every morning?”

Paige’s eyes stayed on the ceiling. “The moment I open my eyes honestly.”

Azzi let her hand move to rest lightly on Paige’s cheek, her thumb brushing against the soft skin. She pressed a kiss to Paige’s jaw, whispering, “You’re allowed to have mornings without it, you know.”

Paige didn’t offer a response right away. Her eyes stayed fixed on the ceiling like she was still thinking about something. Eventually, she said, “I haven’t been able to watch it yet.”

Azzi stayed quiet, letting the words settle as her hand moved slowly, her fingers tracing the line of Paige’s jaw, then brushing lightly over her lower face; her chin, the curve of her mouth, her cheekbone. “Why not?”

Paige let out a breath that sounded like a laugh, but it didn’t reach her eyes. “It’s bad,” she said, dryly. “Feel like pouring bleach in my eye and never stepping foot in the cage again every time I try,” she offered a little dramatically.

Azzi hummed, her thumb still brushing along the edge of Paige’s mouth. “Well…that wouldn’t be very good,” she said, adding a little humor to the situation.

That got a real laugh out of Paige.

Azzi smiled at the sound. “We can watch when we get back to LA,” she offered. “Tonight after I’m done with practice if you want.” There was a pause before she added, “I’ll make sure you don’t pour bleach in those pretty eyes…promise.”

Paige’s lip twitched at the joke. It wasn’t fully a smile, but it hovered to something close. “We don’t gotta do that.”

“We gotta do something,” Azzi said, her tone changing just enough to make Paige glance at her. “Most people wake up a little more gleeful after sex, and I woke up to Oscar the Grouch.”

That earned an eye roll from Paige, but a smile finally broke through as she mumbled, “Whatever bro.”

They laid there in silence for a while just letting the quiet morning wrap around them. Paige had one arm resting behind her head, while Azzi still laid halfway on top of her, tracing shapes on Paige’s forearm.

“Are you coming to my game?” Azzi eventually asked.

Paige tilted her head to glance down at her. “You want me to?”

Azzi shifted enough to meet her gaze. “Yeah. I do…I mean only if you want to though.”

“I was already coming,” Paige said casually. “Just wanted to hear you say you wanted me there.”

Azzi rolled her eyes. “You’re such an asshole.”

“You told me you liked that.”

Azzi sat up and swung one of her legs over to straddle Paige’s waist, her hands finding both of Paige’s wrists and pinning them to the bed. “You got a smart mouth this morning.”

“I had a smart mouth last night too,” Paige replied, smirking a little, “somebody was a lil too busy squirting all over my sheets to notice though.”

Azzi gasped, pretending to be offended and went to smack her, but Paige caught her hand easily and rolled them over making Azzi end up beneath her. Azzi let out a surprised squeal as Paige hovered on top of her, pinning both of her wrists above her head with one hand.

“That’s rude,” Azzi mumbled, squirming a little trying to get out. “That’s twice now you’ve manhandled me.”

“You keeping count?,” Paige asked, grinning at her.

Azzi glared, but she couldn’t hide her smile. “You’re so lucky I kinda like you.”

Paige leaned down a little. “Since we’re admitting things. Don’t know if you knew,” she added casually, “but you’re possessive.”

Azzi blinked in confusion because she’s definitely not, she’d never been jealous in her life.“No, I’m not.”

Paige tilted her head to show two dark marks, one under her jaw and the other on the side of neck, then used her free hand to pull her shirt up revealing a constellation of faint bruises and bite marks on her stomach.

“…Okay. Maybe I’m enthusiastic.”

“Enthusiastic,” Paige repeated. “Sure, let's call it that.”

“I didn’t hear any complaints when I was doing it.”

“I’m not complaining,” Paige said, brushing her nose along Azzi’s jaw. “Just saying next time you wanna mark your territory, maybe let me know so I can stretch my neck first.”

Azzi laughed and let her head fall back into the pillow. “Oh my God, you’re annoying.”

Paige just laughed before flipping them again, not wanting to lay her weight on Azzi. Neither of them wanted to start the day. The bed was warm but Azzi’s phone starting to buzz reminded them that they had to go back to LA.

Azzi was the first to groan and peel herself away from the bed, mumbling something about needing extra time untangle her hair. Paige just hummed as she watched Azzi walk out of the room before letting her eyes flutter shut for a few more minutes before dragging herself to the bathroom.

When Azzi came back, freshly showered and a little more put together, she found Paige in front of the mirror, a toothbrush hanging from her mouth as she looked down at her phone. Her wet hair was down and she had on a sports bra and sweatpants.

Azzi walked over and wrapped her arms around Paige from behind, resting her cheek between her shoulder blades. Azzi closed her eyes and just let herself enjoy the moment before saying, “You gonna be nice to me when we get back?”

Paige leaned forward and spit into the sink before whipping her mouth with a towel. When she was done she turned around, wrapping her arms around Azzi’s waist. When she spoke her voice was low in the way that made Azzi's stomach flutter. “You think I brought you to my family's cabin, walked with you on the beach for hours and carried you back to the car just to turn around and not be nice to you?”

Azzi blinked and her forehead creased as she thought through the logistics. Realizing just how long they'd walked yesterday, and how far back Paige had actually carried her, and how unbothered she’d been about doing it. “Good point.”

Paige smiled at her a little before smacking her ass and kissing her forehead saying, “Alright let’s get outta here.”

[no-144444]

always does- i.hadjar

꩜summary: as isack's best friend, you're a little oblivious until you're not

꩜pairing: isack hadjar x fem! reader

You never understood why Isack kept you so close-by (in a metaphorical sense, of course). You were his best friend, yeah. You didn’t wander away from him, even when he moved. You just… worked through the distance and the time differences, and you were as strong as before. You didn’t pull away too much when he had a girlfriend and you didn’t expect him to pull away too much when you got a boyfriend. When you guys were together, you were there to be together in whatever you were doing. It didn’t matter if it was a simple walk, or a day out at a theme park, time together was few and far between, so you had to make it count. Your other friends stepped back for the day, Isack stood or sat by your side, his hand brushing yours until he eventually took it. And you’d stay like that. Sleep in the same bed. Make morning coffee together. Brush your teeth together. Domestic shit, but it didn’t matter. Isack and you weren’t like that, you never would be. 

Obviously, you knew he was hot. Anyone with eyes and a brain saw the fact that he was conventionally attractive. But you never had that switch in your mind that your other friends had with their guy friends. They spoke about it like some day they just started seeing them differently. Like it was quick. Like it was a snap of fingers, and suddenly you're in love with him. It wasn’t the same for you. Isack was just… Isack. Your Isack. The Isack who bought you ice cream and held your hand walking down the streets of Venice, and that same Isack who would push you into the bushes in his back garden when you raced each other. He hadn’t changed much, just got taller, his voice got deeper, and he was an F1 driver. You hadn’t changed much either, ass and tits, hair longer than when you were five, and you finally didn’t work on the other side of the world, you were in Paris and he was in Monaco. 

“Come to Monaco,” he begged over the phone. “I’m so bored on my own and it’s so weird here.”

“I literally told you so, Isack,” you chuckled. “And anyway, I’ve a date this weekend, so I’m busy.”

He stopped. “A date? Like with a guy?” he asked. “Why do you have a date?”

You scoffed. “Wow, thanks. And it’s just this guy who asked for my number at work. He’s sweet.” 

“Seriously?” he scoffed. You didn’t notice the way his chest tightened and his jaw clenched. You didn’t see the way his breath hitched. “Just reschedule, please. I want you here.”

A younger you would’ve given in with the way he pouted, but you had a date. A date you wanted to attend. “No can-do pretty boy,” you shook your head, and he nearly passed out from the pet name. You didn’t see it, but caught a glimpse of the time. “Oh shit, I better go. Work,” you sighed, getting up. You didn’t wait for an answer. “Love you,” you smiled into your phone camera and hung up, knowing he'd say it back. 

“You’re so fucked for her, aren’t you?” Liam chuckled, sitting beside Isack. It pulled him out of the small world he created on the phone with you. When he saw your apartment, he just thought of the nights he spent there, the smell of the vanilla candles, the warm lights, the wool blankets, you. Isack groaned, putting his phone back into his pocket and looking at his hands. He didn’t like to talk about it. He didn’t really know what to say about it. “Talk,” Liam shrugged. “What’s going on?” “Nothing,” he shrugged. “That’s the problem.” 

“She doesn’t like you back?” he asked, cracking open a can of redbull and handing it to him, then opening one for himself. 

He sighed. “She doesn’t. She doesn’t notice me. I’m just her best friend.” 

“Have you talked to her about it?” Liam asked. 

“How am I supposed to admit something like that?” he questioned. “What if she hates me and doesn’t ever want to talk to me again? What if I lose her completely?”

It was his worst fear. More scary than crashing the car, than losing his seat, than anything. He couldn’t lose you. He refused. 

“I think you need to evaluate what you want and whether or not you can keep going like this,” Liam offered. “And I’m happy to listen more, if you need it.” 

Since when was Liam so philosophical? He listened to Zach Bryan for god’s sake. He got up, tapped Isack on the shoulder, and left him to ruminate. 

He remembered the exact moment he’d fallen for you. You were 15. You had come to visit him at Spa for one of his F4 races, and he’d won. He ran out of the car. You were waiting at the barrier. He couldn’t keep his eyes off you. You stood there, looking so proud, so caring, so you. He couldn’t get enough. He’d race the hell out of any car anyone handed him if it meant he saw that look on your face. And you’d hugged him. You’d kissed his cheek. You stayed up all night celebrating and fell asleep beside him. You didn’t question the way he was looking at you, because maybe he’d always looked at you like that. Maybe it was just him realising then.

But you didn’t feel the same, and that was fine. He didn’t care. Well, he cared a lot, but he wasn’t going to make it your problem. 

Quali was long and which was good and bad. Good, because it meant he was starting 4th in Monaco, which was incredible. Bad, because it meant he didn’t have his phone on him to track your location and watch your date play out in real time. Which is a totally normal thing to do, right?

He jumped out of the car, searching for Liam, or Ollie, or someone to talk to about how shitty the tires would be the next day, but he turned his head to the left and caught a glimpse of a face he knew all too well. 

“What the fuck are you doing here?!” he practically squealed. Ollie would have laughed, but he didn’t care. He wrapped his arm around your waist, lifting you up and against him. “Holy shit,” he breathed into your hair. Like he didn’t believe you were real. Like he couldn’t trust his senses. 

And it was like your eyes opened. 

You liked sleeping in the same bed as Isack. You like brushing your teeth beside him. You like the way he treats you. You liked the way he had kissed you on your 18th birthday when you were both wine drunk in Paris, walking along the river. 

You froze for a moment. You didn’t let him go. He didn’t seem to care, though he untucked his head from your neck and stared at you, confused. “Are you alright?” he asked, his face changing to panic. “Y/n.”

“You’re incredible!” you shook yourself back into the moment, as if you hadn’t just had the most insane realisation of your life. “4th in fucking Monaco!” 

He chuckled, his panic easing. “I know right,” he smirked. “I might just have to be your favourite driver now.”

“Of course you are,” you rolled your eyes. “Always have been,” he didn’t recognise the way you were looking at him, but he welcomed it all the same. “Come on, let’s get you something to eat.”

“You’re quiet,” he whispered, nudging your arm with his own. The paddock was loud and full of his name, but he still noticed you. Well, it would be hard no to, for him. “What’s up?”

You looked down, seeing where your foot collided with his in a constant, soft game of footsies. “Nothing, the sky,” you listed, stifling a giggle. He rolled his eyes and looked up, sighing. It gave you time to look at him. Notice the way his neck had gotten bigger, see the progress he’d made with his training, observe his bulging biceps and arms. Holy shit you had it bad for him, maybe all your mates were right? No, it couldn’t be. Because it wasn’t fast. You’d slowly fallen for him, over a matter of years. Slowly, you’d gotten used to the small things he does for you, you appreciated the hugs and cheek kisses, the protective arm around your shoulder every now and then, that stupid laugh you’d fallen so hard for. It wasn’t this quick, free-fall. It was slow, like a leaf falling down in the autumn wind. It was different. It was Isack. “I don’t know. This weekend just feels… different. Maybe you’ll get on that podium.” 

He chuckled, turning to face you. “I think something’s gone to your head,” he teased. “You sure it’s redbull in that can?”

You scoffed, playfully pushing him. “Never say never. Some things change, even when we don’t expect them too.” 

He stared at you, seeing that look in your eye again. “We’re alright?” he questioned. 

You nodded. “Always.” 

And once again, you walked away, leaving Isack all alone with his feelings. Liam always walked by at the right time, it was disturbing. “She’s in love with you, mate.” 

Isack jumped, not hearing his teammate join him on the bench (he was too busy looking at you longingly). “What the fuck-?!”

“She has it bad for you mate, I know these things,” he nodded. “You should ask her out, she’ll say yes.” 

“Do you remember any of our conversation from the other day?” He stared at him in disbelief as Liam shrugged. “And, I didn’t even think she was coming this weekend so what has changed between then and now, huh?” he questioned, his accent coming out the more he spoke. 

Liam cleared his throat. “Exactly mate, you’re welcome,” he smiled. “Nothing like an unrequited love story in Monaco, anything can happen here.”

“You brought her here?” Isack’s jaw dropped. “For what?!”

“For you, you fucking loser,” Liam chuckled. “Talk to her! Ask her out! Take control of your destiny!” the more he spoke the less Isack knew what he was saying. He stared at him dumbstruck as he walked off, winking at him. 

What a strange weekend. 

Every bone in his body ached to fall into bed, but he just couldn’t sleep. He’d tried everything. Meditation. Breathing exercises. Tea. that navy sleep technique. Visualisations. And now, walking the dark streets of Monaco. The barriers were up. The fanstands were empty, but by tomorrow morning they’d be full. And he’d be in a car on the second row. Part of him couldn’t believe it. Part of him didn’t want to. He had trouble sometimes with taking pride in his work, maybe because in his mind it was an obligation more than an ambition. He didn’t think he’d be truly happy with his career until he lifted that Championship trophy. It didn’t matter how many races he won, how many people called him the goat, or what people said about him. If he didn’t have that trophy it wasn’t worth it. His life’s work wasn’t worth it. And that scared the shit out of him. 

“Fancy meeting you here,” you spoke and he turned his head in disbelief. “Missed me too much already?” 

You had gone to bed earlier than him, and he didn’t have a chance to offer you his bed. Which was fine. But there you were, standing there in the streets he knew like the back of his hand (well, the hairpin he knew like the back of his hand), wearing your pyjamas out in the mild Monaco air. You couldn’t have looked more beautiful. He took a deep breath. “Always,” he smirked, walking up to you. “What are you doing out here so late?”

You rolled your eyes playfully. “Do you always have to be so protective?” you chuckled. “I couldn’t sleep.”

You started walking in step with each other, your hand wrapping around his arm as you spoke. He cleared his throat. “Worried about tomorrow?” he asked, watching your side profile as you kept your eyes ahead. 

You turned to him. “Isn’t that supposed to be my line?” 

There was humor in your voice but it fell flat against the tension between the two of you. He was close. Too close. So close. You could feel his breath on your cheek, and he didn’t step back. He just kept staring. Staring and staring at your face as if he hadn’t seen it a thousand and one times. Like he didn’t know the layout of it like he knew the layout of the track beside you. The streetlamps illuminated his eyes, the perfect shade of brown. God, you could’ve just gotten lost in that moment, staring at him, when saying nothing truly meant everything.

He leaned over and his lips met yours. Not like it was planned but, not like it wasn’t either. Just simple, passionate, soft, and delicate. His hand cupped your cheek like he’d bruise it if he touched you too roughly. You didn’t mind. You kissed him back, gently running your hands through his hair as you felt yourself back up against a barrier. He didn’t stop and neither did you. 

“I love you,” he breathed out against your lips, not thinking clearly. He was drunk off the taste of you, off the moment. “I’ve loved you for a long time.” 

You didn’t answer right away, slightly shocked at the confession. People had mentioned it, pointed it out, or blatantly told you that he was in love with you. You didn’t take it to heart. It was hard not to when his hands were on your face as he kissed you against a barrier in Monaco. Your hands fisted his t-shirt, pulling him closer. “I love you too,” your voice was barely above a whisper, but he heard it. He always did. 

He pulled back with that soft smile on his face, fixing your pyjamas slightly. He looked at you with all the care in the world, but then again, he always did. 

navigation for my blog :)

redbull & vcarb masterlist

[flowergoddessblooms]

"Begin with your account of last Friday. Do not spare any details,"  Detective Harper instructed, shuffling around papers at his desk to make space for his notepad.

Detective Harper was a rather scrawny man in his forties. Not someone visibly suited for the criminal justice system. A man who would probably run as fast as his legs could carry at the sound of a gun shot. That was my first impression of him. Not a word more than necessary, you couldn't tell what was going on behind those hooded eyes of his.

"Begin."

"R-right, yes, last Friday uh... I went to work as usu-"

"Time."

"Uh, Seven thirty- no probably around eight am. I checked in around then, you'll find the records for that I'm sure, I was just a little late, I mean I do stay close by bu-"

"Job."

"Sorry, right, I work at a behavioral therapy centre."

No response.

"Um, I checked in at work, I had two sessions that day with um, Alice and James, um they're kids assigned to me. Uh, it's been a year now, James has shown great development, he can sit still in one place for around 40 minutes and Alice... Alice is getting better at holding eye con-"

"Next."

"Right, er sorry, yes, I left work at 4 pm, uh, went home. I live alone so it's just a small house with a nice yard that I've rented and it's close to work so I don't have to commute, you know how it-"

"Friday Night."

"Uh- uh, I just spent some time playing the guitar, had dinner and went to sleep on the couch, the fire was quite nice and cozy, so yeah, nothing too grand."

Tired of fidgeting with my nails, which had almost begun to bleed, I looked up to meet the Detective's stare. Uncanny, creepy, he wouldn't blink whatsoever.

"Uh- am I done here?"

"You may be called back for further interrogation."

"Right, thank you. I assure you I really haven't done anything. You shouldn't-"

"You may go."

Embarrassed, I hurried to leave, when the door to the office bust open, multiple officers crowding in.

"GET DOWN!" he thundered as two of them tackled me to the floor, cuffing me roughly.

"What ...wh..why...I didn't... Nothing...why...what did I.."

"Oh, you know what you did, you sick bastard."

My eyes whizzed around the room trying to understand the situation, when I noticed one of the head officers, glaring at me as he tossed a small burnt leather notebook onto the Detective's desk.

Bile rose to my throat. My vision blurred. Knees buckled. The room tilted.

"H-how did-"

And the world turned dark.

Diary of _________

Monday, June 27

I'm not a violent person. Even when I was bullied in school, I would quietly take it. I couldn't worry Mom. She would've cried about not being able to provide for the both of us and blamed herself for it all. I couldn't bear to see that. So I never hurt anyone.

THEN WHY IS THERE A BODY IN MY HOUSE

Dinner. It was supposed to be a simple dinner. I had asked my landlord if I could put up a fence. Alex was furious when he saw it go up. Said it brought down the property value in the area. I just wanted to talk. TALK. NOT THIS. I DON'T EVEN REMEMBER KILLING HIM.

Oh God. He's cold. So cold. I don't. I didn't. But he's here. I can't even look at him, his eyes are bulging out of his- oh god. I've puked at least three times now. I feel sick. I need to fix this.

Wednesday, June 29

His maid found him lying on the floor, rotting. I heard her scream all the way here. It was nauseating. I can't stop imagining him... I don't...

And even worse, I found scratch marks on me yesterday. I think I tortured him. I don't remember any of it. WHY

Thursday, June 30

I keep finding my clothes in places they shouldn't be in. My shoes seem weird. They're tracking mud, but I haven't been to any such place in ages! I find my clothes wrinkled up in the laundry basket, clothes I don't remember wearing. I'm scared.

Friday, July 1

AGAIN. I have weird contacts on my phone. People I don't remember calling. People whose numbers I shouldn't have. Am I losing my mind? Do I need to go to the hospital? No. No I can't. The scratch marks. No I can't

Saturday, July 2

I actually yelled at my children today. Alice was in tears. She wouldn't even look at me. What is happening to me? I didn't mean to. I hate myself. I'm so scared. Somebody help me. Please, help me.

Sunday, 3rd July

SHUT UP, WILL YOU? writing a fucking diary. stupid shit. im helping you out. shut up and take it and stop being a little bitch while you're at it.

oh and also don't be a fucking nuisance and sit quietly. like you always have.

WHO ARE YOU?

fucking idiot. that's why everyone uses your dumbass. especially that neighbour of yours. he did have a point, that's an ugly ass fence. but your hoe ass couldn't even defend yourself. you did it because he kept leaving his trash and dog shit and piss on your property. you should've nipped this problem in the bud. im doing you a fucking favour AND THIS IS WHAT I GET?!

fucking ridiculous. and that coworker of yours is so fucking irritating. asshole steals your ideas to pitch. can't even think for himself. and you, you dumbfuck, you wag your tail behind him every time he shows up with shit like pies and candy. fuckers deserved that death.

It can't be. You can't possibly be...No, please, we can't, it isn't right.

oh DON'T YOU HAVE HIGH MORALS

listen here, you little shit. i would've helped you out before if you weren't so fucking nice all the damn time. it was so fucking difficult to wake up. here's a little quiz for you. why do you think that your high school bully graduated on crutches? stupid shit. and don't fuck with me. YOU liked it.

I didn't. I did not.

HAH, what's this? you want to play hero? you fucker, you know damn well you liked seeing him in pain. why deny, loser

Monday, 4th July

HEY YOU LITTLE SHIT ARE YOU IGNORING ME?

Tuesday, 5th July

OH YOU'RE SO GOING TO GET IT

Stop...stop hurting me, I'm sorry. Please, don't break my things, please. The house is a mess. Please.

Why are you cutting my skin? I'm scared.

GOOD. you deserve it. i always have to go the extra mile to earn the tiniest shred of respect, don't i?

Please, please I'm sorry.

you better be. and for fucks sake, pick up a new hobby or something. not that a dumbass like you would understand but it's quite easy to pin blame on a guy who does absolutely nothing, has no alibis and gets harassed.

I'll do whatever you say, I'll pick up a hobby, but please. I don't like my coworkers. Especially Sebastian. Please don't make me go out with them.

whatever. useless as always. i have to do everything around here.

____________________________________

And that is how a month went by. People around me died left and right. It was never the same murder. Strangulation, drug overdose, drowning. He even got someone to crash into Seb's car which ended up killing him. I have no idea how.

But I didn't like Seb anyway. He ostracised me at work and I had trouble getting new clients. Seb spread rumours that I was harassing my clients and stealing my ideas for therapy development. How dare he. I love those children.

At least he won't bother me anymore. Neither will the neighbour. Nor my old bullies.

I was getting happier. I could breathe.

Until the police dropped by.

Wednesday, July 29

What did you do?

Why did the police come by?

ANSWER ME

Thursday, July 30

HEY, I WANT ANSWERS

Friday, July 31

HEY YOU, ANSWER ME, WHAT DID YOU DO, WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO, TELL ME

Say something, please

He never responded.

I knew the police had their doubts about me so I threw that book into the fireplace. It was the only damning piece of evidence I knew about anyway. 'Would they find anything else in a lie detector test? Do they even do that now?' I thought as the fire crackled, turning the edges of the diary to ash, burning away my worries.

SO WHY DO THEY HAVE IT?

I SHOULD'VE DISPOSED IT OFF BETTER. WHY AM I ALWAYS MAKING MISTAKES?!

I stared at the Detective, tears in my eyes.

I could feel my vision blur, my peripherals getting darker. My heart was pounding in my ears. I couldn't breathe.

Eternity passed by the time he was done reading. He limped over to me, kneeling to match my eyes.

I can't. I can't look at him. I'm going to puke.

"Court mandated therapy is the best you'll get. If you're unlucky, however...." his voice trailed off as he rose to leave.

"... first degree...but...intentions..."

The room fell silent. Strangled under the pressure of everyone's piercing glare, I choked out, " I didn't inte- ... I didn't .. I didn't have any intentions."

Detective Harper froze in place as he slowly turned to catch my eye.

That was the first expression I saw on his face. A smile.

Pity.

"Oh, but a part of you did."

Your harassing neighbor dies. Then a bullying coworker dies in a crash. Within a month, people you’ve had bad blood with start dying. The police are watching you closely—but you haven’t done anything… at least, not that you know of.

[mydearzero]

The Babysitter | Robert 'Bob' Reynolds x fem!Reader - Chapter 6 | Hurt

Summary: You didn’t have any superpowers, nor were you even qualified for the position, yet somehow a mishap between Alexei and Yelena ends up in getting you a new job. Bob-sitter. 

Contents: No Y/N, fem!reader, college student!reader, themes of depression, violence, choking

Read it on AO3 | Chapter 1 | Chapter 5

2.2K words

A/N: I currently have an insane cold and am dying and this is not proofread so I’m sorry if it makes zero sense

“What the hell is this? A sleepover?” Walker’s voice was a deafening boom in the peaceful morning. Pain shot up your back as you got up from your uncomfortable sleeping position on the floor. Bob also stirred awake, though a bit more lethargically. 

Ava followed John into the living room. “What’s going on?” She asked. 

“Apparently Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum over here had a sleepover and forgot to invite the rest of us,” Walked scoffed. He spared the situation no second thought, dropping his taco-shaped shield next to the couch and walking into the kitchen to make himself some coffee. Both of them were still in full gear, so you assumed they came straight from wherever it was the emergency had been. 

“I thought I told you there was a free room next to Bob’s?” Ava looked at you pointedly. You gave her a sheepish smile as your eyes fell on Bob, who was gathering the pillows and blanket you put with him last night and put them back on the couch. 

“Yeah, my stuff is in there. We just… Stayed up too late talking, I guess.” It was a lame excuse, even if it was the truth. You didn’t want to tell them about the conversation you’d had with Bob, afraid you were going to lose this amazing job after so little time. 

“That’s… Fun, I suppose. I’m staying at the tower today, so you can go home whenever you like. Yelena will text you if something comes up.” And that’s how easily you were dismissed. 

Bob had gone back to locking himself in his room, something which didn’t go unnoticed. Walker sat at the dining table, tablet in one hand, coffee in the other. From what you could see, he was reading some type of debrief. All classified information, of course. 

You heard Alexei before you saw him. The elevator doors had yet to open, but his voice was already slipping through the cracks. 

“And then– WHABAM, he goes down. Very proud of you, Lena. Great work,” was what you could make of it when the doors slid open. 

“I know, Alexei. I was there. Thank you,” Yelena grumbled, slipping off her boots and kicking them into the abyss. 

Another person had followed them out of the elevator, some you had yet to have the pleasure of meeting. Just as you looked him up and down, he extended a hand, a metal hand, for you to shake. You gripped and shook it, introducing yourself. 

“So I’ve heard. I’m Bucky. Bob do okay?” He wondered. You hesitated before nodding, deciding to simply not speak as to not give too many details. 

Before you forgot you turned to Yelena. She’d become your go-to person when it came to anything Bob related. And everything else, really. 

“By the way, Valentina came by,” you grimaced. You heard multiple groans from the team. 

“What did she want?” Yelena asked, joining Walker at the dining table with her own steaming mug of coffee. 

“I don’t know, actually. She was kinda… I don’t know.” You shrugged. Ava narrowed her eyes at the statement, clocking the fact you knew more than you were letting on. 

“What are you not telling us?” Walked asked, also having caught on. 

You chewed the inside of your cheek and looked around before answering. “Look, I genuinely don’t know with what intentions she came over. What I do know is that she tried to, like, bribe me? To, y’know, hand Bob over, or whatever,” you were deflecting. 

“And?” Ava urged you to continue. 

“And nothing. She left before anything could go down,” you shrugged. 

“She just left? That doesn’t sound like her,” Bucky piped up. 

“Bob might have told her to leave, but that’s all that happened. Like I said, I don’t know why she came over.” 

“Well, whatever it was, it can’t have been anything good. She knew we were unavailable. My guess is she overlooked the fact you’d be here, too.” Ava concluded. 

“Where is Bob?” Alexei asked. Neither him, Yelena or Bucky had witnessed the both of you curled up on the floor. 

“In his room. He was there all day yesterday, too, after Valentina left,” you told them. 

“And you let him?” There was an underlying tone of accusation in Walker’s voice. Your guards shot up and you felt the need to defend yourself. Before you got a chance to speak, Walker spoke again. 

“Isn’t that the whole fucking reason you’re here? So he doesn’t lock himself away and drown in his sorrows or whatever?” His eyes were narrowed, eyebrows set in a deep frown. 

“I mean, he’s a grown man. I can’t exactly force him to spend time with me,” you retorted, mirroring John’s heated tone. 

“Tell me. If he locked himself in his room, how come you were all cuddled up on the floor when we came in?” 

“He came out eventually and we talked and he fell asleep so I tried to make him comfortable and I guess I must’ve fallen asleep, too.” You crossed your arms. 

“Oh yeah? And what did you talk about?” Walker questioned. 

“Why does that matter?” You spat back. 

“Why does that matter? Why does that matter? Where the hell did you find this girl? Is she fucking stupid?” Walked had gotten up out of his seat and was slowly making his way over to where you were standing, getting in your face. 

“John, that’s enough,” Yelena tried to butt in, but it didn’t work. 

“The whole fucking reason you’re even relevant whatsoever right now is because you’re supposed to keep little Bobby over there from going nuclear, you hear?” John’s finger was pointing in your face. 

“Nobody has told me why that would be a problem! How am I supposed to be doing when I don’t even know what I’m trying to prevent?!” Your voice was getting louder and louder. 

“You didn’t tell her?” Bucky asked full of disbelief. 

“Didn’t really get a chance to, yet,” Yelena tried, but she knew it was bullshit, too. They should’ve told you. 

“She should know what she’s up against if she’s gonna be risking her life like that, don’t you think?” Bucky seemed to be on your side. 

“Risking my life? What are you talking about?” Your eyebrows shot up. You turned to Yelena, looking for answers.

“I told you, he’s stronger than all of us combined and his powers are unstable and tied to his mental wellbeing. Does that not cover enough to tell you that if he goes downward, that means nothing good?” She asked. She had a point, there. She did tell you those things. But she also left out the details enough to not scare you off. Clever. 

“You missed the detail where I’m apparently risking my own life!” You jeered. 

“You wouldn’t be risking your life if you did your fucking job and kept him distracted!” John shouted. You glanced back at him, expression as equally furious as your own. 

“Did he seem off last night?” Ava was a lot calmer than the others. 

You didn’t have to answer for them to know. “Great,” Walker mocked. “Just amazing.” 

“I didn’t know! I knew his mental wellbeing was important, but I didn’t know it was to this extent” you gestured around you. Clearly you had misjudged the size of the problem. 

Walked stalked closer. You took a few steps back, shoulders hitting a wall. You felt caged as he got all up in your face. 

“Listen here, little girl. If you fucked this up? If we go into Bob's room and he’s not– If he’s not Bob?” The threat went unspoken. 

“How would that be my fault?” 

“You had one job. Stop him from going dark,” you had no clue what he meant by ‘going dark’, but you could imagine. The flickers of darkness you’d witnessed the night before, combined with the first time you’d shaked Bob’s hand, told you it was trouble. 

Your eyes flickered to those of the rest of the team. Nobody moved a muscle. A door slammed down the hallway. It couldn’t have been yours, as it was currently still shattered to pieces on the floor. 

It was then you noticed John’s hand. It had reached out to you. To do what, you’d never know. It was hovering mid-air, John visibly straining against an invisible force holding him back. 

“That’s enough.” 

Everybody tensed. It was Bob, but it also wasn’t. 

‘You see, Bob… He’s very strong. Stronger than all of us combined. But he’s not stable.’ 

Yelena’s words echoed through your mind. They were scared. Not for you or for Bob, but for themselves. The slight shift in their postures was enough to scare you shitless. 

You made eye contact with a wide-eyed Yelena. She was gesturing to the elevator with her eyes, telling you to get the hell out. You couldn’t move from your current position, caged by a petrified Walker. It was then you finally craned your neck enough to be able to see him. He didn’t look any different, aside from the bright eyes and flared nostrils. 

“You guys are talking about me as if I’m a child. A bit degrading, don’t you think?” 

Nobody replied. They all awaited his next move. He put his hand down, finally releasing his invisible hold on Walker. 

“Bob, let’s talk about this,” Ava tried, but Bob cut her off. 

“I think we’ve talked enough, don’t you? I’m aware I’m unstable. I know my other side isn’t allowed to come out and play. But hiring a full fledged babysitter for a grown man? A little emasculating, no?” Who was this and what had he done with the soft spoken Bob? 

“You baby me, treat me like I’m gonna break at any moment and keep me locked in here like a goddamn damsel and think that’s what is best for me?” Nobody interrupted him. 

He commanded the room, took up all the space. He took all the air for himself, leaving no room for any of you to breathe. 

“How good do you think that is for someone’s self image, hmm?” It was self deprecating yet sounded offensive at the same time. Then he turned to you. 

“You tried, you really did. With all the therapy speak? Talking as if you know what I’m going through?” Walker had long gotten out of the way, but you hadn’t moved away from the wall. 

“Bob, leave her alone. She hasn’t done anything wrong,” Bucky tried to intervene. 

“I’m not gonna hurt her, don’t you worry,” he didn’t look away from you when he addressed the team. His hand slowly reached for your throat. You squeezed your eyes shut. He didn’t put any pressure, but the fingers wrapping around your neck were a warning. 

“I’m not gonna hurt you. I’m not gonna let them hurt you, either.” He whispered. Then he craned his neck around. 

“Maybe I should let him out. Make sure you all understand once and for all who you’re dealing with. I’ve tried to play nice, but maybe that’s just not who I am inside. Maybe I’m just not the sweet guy you all make me out to be.” It sounded sadder than he’d probably intended. It was supposed to come across as a threat, but he was so clearly just waiting for them to confirm he was a monster. 

You pushed past your fear and against your better judgement slowly brought your hand up to cradle his face. His eyes snapped to yours, but there was no sign of recognition. He looked at the gash on your cheek, now scabbed over. He ran his thumb over the wound. 

It was enough to momentarily distract him. Bucky had pierced the skin on his neck with a syringe. You didn’t want to know what was in it for it to be strong enough to work that fast on someone with Bob’s powers. For now, you were glad it knocked him out. He slumped against you and you struggled to hold his dead weight. Alexei quickly jumped in to help you and picked Bob up easily, putting him on the couch. 

“You should go home,” Bucky suggested as he pushed his hair back. You nodded and finally peeled yourself away from the wall. 

“Is he gonna be okay?” You asked. 

“I wasn’t even sure it was gonna work, if I’m honest. He’ll probably wake up in a few minutes. Probably best to leave before then,” Bucky reassured you. 

You hastily grabbed your stuff out of the unused bedroom and made your way back home.You were glad for the commute, at least having some time to think. The entire time you couldn’t help but wonder what you could’ve done. What you should’ve done differently. Maybe you did need to step away for a bit. Bob needed real help, not some college girl who just chats with him in the hopes of keeping his mind off the complexity that is mental health. 

You let yourself fall on your couch. A lot less nice than the one in the tower, that’s for sure. The lack of sleep and all the stress of the morning caught up to you. You felt yourself doze off before you could catch yourself.

TAGLIST: @jason-todd-fangirl-14 @hopes-peak-akademy @rattheraddestrat @i-shall-abide @puer-aurea @kennywantskfc69 @spectacled-studies @hiddlebatchedloki @chimchoom @spidermiraculous-blog @s00ty-feet @28cnn @tinythebunni @softpia @roeroeroeyourboet @secretkittydreamland @cultish-corner @greenbean-4ever @t-rexs-world @thebitchiestnerdtowalktheearth @ifilwtmfc @renren-006 @10ava01 @kawaii1369 @hawkinsavclub1983 @paleepeaches @lnmp89 @frozenhuntress67 @my-name-is-baby @a-moranguei @daisyyy47 @petersluvbug @articel1967

[gojoscumrag]

ღ his best friend’s sister - part 2

warnings: bondage, gagging, risky fucking

It started quiet. Just a night with your brother. Takeout containers, a half-watched movie, a couple of beers split between you and Geto as the dorm lights dimmed. You’d missed this. You’d missed him. When he yawned and stretched, scratching the back of his neck, you knew it was time to wind down. You didn’t mean to fall asleep in Geto’s bed. Not really. You were just warm, tipsy, a little too soft from the drinks and the movie marathon. He’d passed out first, arm over his eyes, the slow rise and fall of his chest the only movement in the room.

You curled on the far side, back turned to your brother. His hoodie still smelling faintly of Gojo’s detergent. Somewhere past midnight then, the door creaked open. You didn’t move, and you kept your breath steady, your pulse rattling in your throat. You knew it was him. No one else walked that silently. No one else let the room hum with cursed energy like that, heavy and dangerous and unmistakably his. Then you felt it. The weight of him behind you. His hands didn’t touch you, but his presence did. So solid it made your skin tighten with goosebumps.

“Satoru,” you mouthed silently.

He didn’t say a word.

His cursed energy flickered low and hot. Your wrists pinned gently above your head, held invisible against the pillow. The hoodie bunched up slowly, as his fingers skimmed your thighs. Then you felt the blunt press of his cock, nudging your soaked folds from behind. You dared a glance. Geto hadn’t moved. Still asleep. Still just a few feet away. And Gojo was pushing into you. No prep. No warning. Just a slow, stretching slide of his cock inside your dripping cunt. You gasped, but the sound never came. He pressed your own pillow over your face, muffling you like a goddamn psycho.

“That’s right,” he whispered into your ear, voice so low it made your thighs shake. “Be a good little secret. Take it.”

He fucked you like that, deeply and lazy. The bed barely creaked under the motion. His hand was under the hoodie now, squeezing your tits, tweaking your nipple until you were grinding back against him helplessly.

“You’re filthy,” he muttered. “Getting off while your brother’s in the room?”

You moaned softly against the pillow, trembling as his cock dragged along every sensitive inch inside you.

“You know he’d kill me,” Gojo breathed. “But you keep crawling back.”

He pulled back just enough to thrust hard. Once. Twice. Each one deeper than the last.

“You sleep here in his fucking clothes. You let him tuck you in,” he growled. “And now you’re stuffed full of me. What would he say if he saw how well you take it?”

You clenched around him. Gojo bit your shoulder lightly, hand pressing to your lower stomach. “Feel that? That’s me. That’s how deep I am, baby.”

You were going to break. You were going to cum with his cock buried to the hilt while your brother slept a few feet away.

“Come for me,” he hissed. “Make a mess. I’ll fill you up so good you leak through those panties.”

You shattered. Legs trembling, mouth open in a silent scream against the pillow as your pussy milked him greedily. And Gojo growled like an animal when he came. Deep and filthy, thick spurts painting your insides as he held you down and filled you until you couldn’t breathe.

He didn’t pull out. Didn’t even move right away. Just pressed a kiss to the back of your neck, still cock-deep inside you, whispering, “This is never gonna stop.”

It was supposed to be a joke.

“Wouldn’t it be hot if he walked in on us?” Gojo had whispered against your neck one night, his cock grinding against your ass while you were pinned to his bedroom wall.

You’d scoffed breathlessly. “You’re insane.”

But now you were gagged with his blindfold, wrists bound with his Jujutsu High-issued belt to the headboard of your bed, knowing damn well that your brother wanted to come over later.

Spread open and dripping, a string of saliva stretched from your parted lips as Gojo knelt between your thighs, pumping his cock slowly before plunging it back inside you.

“Oh, you like this,” he whispered, grinning like a devil as he drove in deep. “You’re tighter when you’re scared.”

You moaned around the fabric in your mouth, eyes rolling as he fucked you harder. He wanted to leave bruises, leave proof, leave everything behind in you.

“You wanna get caught,” he taunted, voice hoarsely. “You want him to see how good you ride his best friend’s cock.”

You shook your head weakly, but your cunt clenched around him, all wet, hot, throbbing as he bullied his cock against your cervix.

“You’re so wet, it’s obscene,” Gojo muttered, sweat dripping down his neck. “Fucking look at you. Ruined. Stuffed full of me while Suguru’s down the hall.”

The door opened and you of you froze. Geto’s footsteps paused just inside the room. “Satoru?” he called out suspiciously. “What are you—” Then the silence cracked open. A deep breath. A slow exhale. “What the fuck.”

You whimpered, but Gojo didn’t stop. He thrust deep again, hands gripping your thighs as your bound wrists strained above your head. His blindfold still gagged your mouth, soaked with spit. Your eyes flicked to Geto’s silhouette in the doorway and it only made your pussy tighten around Gojo’s cock.

He groaned. “She begged for it, Suguru.”

You moaned, desperate and trembling. You wanted to die. You wanted to cum.

“Fuck,” Geto muttered dangerously, but his feet didn’t move. “You’re both sick.”

Gojo grinned. “Told you she was a brat. Look at her. Look at how good she takes it.”

Geto turned to leave and Gojo snapped his hips one more time, slow and possessive. “Next time,” he called after him, “maybe you should stay and see what your sister really likes.”

The door slammed. And Gojo came deep inside you with a low groan, hips jerking against your slick thighs. You were still tied up. Still gagged. Still gasping.

“You’re mine,” he whispered against your skin. “Even if he hates me for it.”

[fantasticfourthwingimagines]

Could We Give It an Hour? Pairing - Aaric Graycastle x Cordella!Reader Summary - As soon as Aaric revealed his true identity to you, and then took off on a mission, you were furious. Then time began to pass, and you slowly started to realize what your life looked like without him. Now that he's back, is how much you've missed him enough to forgive him? Word Count - 4k Warnings - smutty situations, but no smut, language, Onyx Storm spoilers!

It wasn’t until he was gone that you realized how much Aaric had become woven into your everyday life. You had spent all your classes, spare time, and late night study sessions with him. You’d spent nearly every waking moment with him. Sometimes even the ones meant for sleep. You were still furious. Angry that he’d kept this massive secret from you when he’d had multiple chances to tell you the truth. But every day without him, the sharp edge of that fury dulled, replaced by something harder to ignore. 

You missed him. 

You weren’t sure what hurt more. The betrayal, or the hole he’d left behind. Were his reasons valid or were you just so desperate to see him again that you were convincing yourself they might be? Then on top of all that was the fear. A good portion of your family and Aaric were all on this quest with no way to contact any of you back at Basgaith. Some or all of them could be dead for all you knew, and that thought was terrifying. 

“Staring out the window angrily isn’t going to make them come back any faster.” 

You flicked your gaze over to the man sitting beside you, working through his physics homework, then looked back out at the rainy landscape. “You don’t know that.” 

Bodhi raised an eyebrow. “Are you a precog now?” 

Your chest gave a little twinge at the subtle reminder of Aaric that Bodhi didn’t even realize he had made. “Aren’t you worried about them too?” You asked, your voice quiet. “It’s your cousin, your friends.” 

“Of course I am.” Bodhi shut his book and leaned back. “I just don’t broadcast it like you do.” 

Leaning back against your seat, you crossed your arms over your chest. “I hate this.” You muttered. 

Bodhi studied you for a long moment before saying,“You hate this or you hate that you let your boyfriend leave while you’re pissed at him?” 

“He’s not my-” You stopped. What even was he now? Boyfriend felt too small. Liar felt too harsh.

“Oh, right. What is he then, your prince?” Bodhi asked with a smirk.

Your eyes widened as you glanced around, making sure no one could have overheard. Then you smacked his arm. “Shush! We’re not supposed to talk about that!” 

He shrugged his shoulders. “Then maybe you shouldn’t have told me. Besides, it’s not like his brother hasn’t spread it around the whole college now.” 

But you had to tell someone. After he had revealed who he was on that flight field, you didn’t think you’d be able to work through this on your own. Bodhi, who you’ve known for years now, was the obvious choice. “I needed to talk about it or I’d explode, and you, Bodhi Durran, whether you like it or not, are probably my best friend.” 

He rolled his eyes at you, but a smile pulled up a corner of his lips. “You really don’t have a lot of friends do you?” 

You shrugged your shoulders. “You don’t need a lot when you’ve already got the best.” You teased. 

He let out a laugh and shook his head. “Now I know you’re full of shit.” 

“Hey!” You shoved his shoulder with your own. “Don’t talk about my best friend like that.” 

Bodhi was still grinning, but didn’t say anything for a couple moments before returning to the conversation. “You know, it’s kinda ironic. He’s out here in the Riders Quadrant for the same reason you are. He didn’t think he could make a difference in the palace, so he came to the place he could.” 

You huffed. “Yeah, I get that. I’m not mad about why he’s here.” Your eyes dropped to your hands, fingers twisting unconsciously. “I’m mad that he lied to me about who he is.” 

“And I think that’s fair. You have every right to be pissed off.” He leaned back and folded his arms behind his head. “I guess now you’ve just got to decide if being pissed off is still worth it.” 

You gave him a flat look, and he held up his hands.

“But do me a favor.” Bodhi added.

You raised your eyebrow at him. 

“For the love of Amari, don’t turn into another Violet and Xaden where I have to watch you two dance around each other for months while you try to decide whether to forgive him.” He said with a sigh. 

You grimaced. “Months? Gods.” You bit your lip before admitting, “Does it make me pathetic that a small part of me has already forgiven him?” 

Bodhi shook his head. “Nah. I think you understand why he did it more than you want to admit.” 

You sighed. He was right - again. 

You understood why Aaric had withheld his true identity from you. Thinking about it, you couldn’t be sure you wouldn’t hide your own identity given the opportunity. That didn’t mean it hadn’t hurt that he felt he couldn’t trust you. “I need to talk to him.” You admitted. 

“You might get the chance sooner than you think.” Bodhi said, his eyes locked on something outside the window as he slowly stood from his chair.

You glanced up to where he was looking until you saw it . . . A horde of dragons and gryphons headed straight for Basgaith. The big, black one absolutely unmistakable. 

“They have returned.” Aleksandria confirmed, even though you didn’t need her to. 

You and Bodhi looked at each other, and the far away look in his eyes told you he was getting the same information you were. Neither of you said another word. You took off running. 

By the time you and Bodhi reached the flight field, they were already on the ground, and you skidded to a stop mere feet from your sister. “Did you-” you started to ask, but she cut you off. 

For the first time in years, Cat wrapped her arms around you in a tight embrace. You were shocked, unsure of how to respond, but that hesitation didn’t last. You quickly hugged her back, and for the briefest moment, you thought you felt her shoulders tremble. Was that a sniffle? 

Then, just as quickly, she pulled away and walked past you without a word, like it had never happened.

You glanced over at your cousin who was watching Cat with quiet concern, and Maren who, with a sad smile at you, began following her best friend. 

“What was that about?” You asked Drake, heart already creeping into your throat. 

He reached out, his hand heavy on your shoulder. “We lost Trager.” 

Your world tilted. “I - what?” 

You hadn’t necessarily been close with Trager, not like Maren or Cat, but the blow still hit you with brutal force. He’d always been nice and friendly to you, even when Cat had brushed him off for years, pretending not to notice how hopelessly in love he was with her. And now . . .

Drake pulled you into a brief, grounding hug. “I’m going to go check on her. If she’ll let me.” His voice was rough, quiet.

You nodded. Cat letting anyone in when she was grieving was unlikely - but stranger things had happened. Like her hugging you.“You’ll tell me if she needs me?” You asked. 

Drake nodded, and his gaze shifted just past you. 

You turned to follow it, and there he was. 

Aaric. 

He stood a short distance away, watching you, still as stone. But his eyes - gods those eyes, they softened the moment they met yours, and your heart gave a traitorous stutter. 

When you looked back at Drake, he was watching you now, a faint, knowing smirk tugging at his mouth. “You’ll tell me if you need me?” He asked, head tilting toward Aaric. 

You nodded, even though you knew it wouldn’t be necessary. 

He gave your shoulders one more squeeze before heading after your sister. 

You walked over to Aaric, wrapping your arms around yourself as you approached. He didn’t move, didn’t speak, but his eyes searched you like he was trying to memorize you all over again. 

Up close, you gave him a careful glance over, thankful to see no obvious injuries. Of course that didn’t mean they weren’t there. “Are you okay?” You asked softly 

Aaric nodded, those damn green eyes boring into yours like they could see every unspoken thing in your chest. 

“I’m still upset with you.” You told him, but you didn’t move when he took another step towards you. 

“I know.” He said. 

Gods, his voice. You hadn’t realized how much you missed the sound of it until now, and with that one word, it made any bit of your self control snap. 

You stepped into him and wrapped your arms around his waist. He didn’t hesitate, his arms were around you instantly, one hand burying in your hair as he held you like he’d been waiting for this exact moment since he left. 

It felt maddeningly good. Too good. 

Your pride screamed in protest, but your heart won the battle. “I missed you,” You admitted, voice muffled against his chest. “Even while I was furious, I still missed you.”

You closed your eyes as you felt his kiss, soft and lingering to the top of your head. “If it makes you feel any better, your sister spent a majority of her time she wasn’t poking at Violet, loudly criticizing every decision I’ve ever made. Especially ones involving you.”

A watery laugh escaped your throat, small but real. If you could depend on Cat for nothing else, she would at least always defend you. “She’s not wrong.” 

“I didn’t say she was.” 

He pulled back just enough to cup your cheek, and your breath hitched at the gentleness in his touch. His thumb brushed your skin, and his eyes were impossibly green, impossibly close. 

“One hour.” He said. 

You blinked. “What?” 

“Can we put aside the conversation that I know we have to have for an hour?” Aaric asked, his fingers moved slowly, massaging the back of your scalp. “Let me be here. With you.” 

You were still confused. “Why?” 

He leaned forward, pressing his forehead to yours. “Because, I really fucking missed you.” He said, with a soft, almost broken laugh. “and I just want to pretend for a little while that nothing’s wrong.” 

There was something in his voice you’d never heard before. It was almost like he was pleading. Aaric didn’t plead, and maybe that’s why your heart twisted. 

Selfishly, you wanted to pretend your last conversation had never happened either. Pretend he hadn’t kept that secret. Pretend you hadn’t missed him every single day. 

You slipped your hand into his, and the way his shoulders eased, the way he exhaled like he’d been holding his breath for weeks, said everything. 

When you reached your room and shut the door behind you, he was already pulling you in. One arm wrapped tight around your back, his other hand under your chin, tilting it up so you couldn’t look away. “I just need to know one thing.” Aaric said. 

You let your arms wind around his waist, grounding yourself in his warmth. “What?” 

“Do you still want me?” 

Aaric had never been unsure. The whole time you’d known him, he’d never had any ounce of self doubt or feelings that he was unworthy of anything he wanted. It was something you envied, but right now you saw it. The bit of worry in his eyes that you would say no, that you would turn him away. While you knew logically it was what you should do, hurt him like he had hurt you, you couldn’t make yourself lie. “Against my better judgement.” You admitted. 

That was all he needed. Aaric bent down and met your lips in a kiss, his hand sliding down to grip your neck and hold you there with him. He kissed you like he’d been waiting his whole life to - fierce and hungry and utterly consuming. 

Gods why did kissing him have to feel like this? Like home and fire and everything in between.  Aaric kissed you like there was never going to be a place you were supposed to be other than his arms. He was going to keep you there with him. 

You hated how much you loved it. 

Your hands wandered without permission, trailing up his chest until you reached the collar of his shirt, tugging at it like you could pull him even closer. He responded in kind, pulling you flush against him as he deepened the kiss, his tongue slipping past your lips with practiced ease. 

Your mind shut down. Your body did whatever Aaric told it to without any question. You couldn’t find it in yourself to be ashamed though, because it felt so damn good to not think and be shown what to do. 

At least with this. 

You let out a gasp against his lips as his hand moved from your neck, sliding down your body, then reaching around to grab your ass. His other hand joined the first, and suddenly you were in the air and being carried over to your bed. It was only when he laid you both down carefully that you could make yourself pull away from his kiss. “We’re not having sex.” You blurted, breathless. 

Aaric paused, one eyebrow lifting as a smirk curved at the edge of his lips. “Then you should probably get your hand out of my pants.” 

Your eyes widened slightly in mortification. Gods you hadn’t even realized you were about three seconds from touching him. You pulled your hand away like you’d been caught, laying it safely on top of the sheets beside you. “And you should probably take your hands off my ass.” 

He frowned slightly but did what you asked. “Can I hold you?” 

You didn’t hesitate. “I’d be even more pissed off at you if you didn’t.” 

Aaric rolled over onto his back, slipping his arm under you and tugging you against his chest. You couldn’t help but smile as you felt his kiss against the top of your head. “Tell me what I missed.” He said. 

You reached over for his hand, lacing your fingers together. “With school or gossip?” You teased. 

“Mhmm . . . both.” He murmured, his other hand idly tracing patterns up and down your back. 

You paused, sorting through what actually mattered. “You’re definitely going to fail physics if you don’t study my notes. History’s not looking great either.”

Aaric groaned.

“As for gossip . . . It was quiet without Ridoc, honestly. Except I think that Sloane is definitely crushing on Aetos because she was extra surly the whole time you guys were gone.” You said. 

He huffed a small laugh. 

“Oh, and Sawyer and that scribe? Something’s definitely happening there.” 

“About damn time.” Aaric muttered, his fingers tightening slightly around yours. 

You hesitated for a moment before saying the next part, but you figured he should probably know now. “You’ve also gone up in popularity now that everyone knows who you are.” 

He let out a sigh. “Let me guess - Halden?” 

You smirked. “There might even be a fan club forming.”

He groaned, closing his eyes. 

“I don’t think he knows about . . .” What were the two of you? Once again, you couldn’t think of a word to describe it properly, so you just held up your entwined hands awkwardly. “This.” 

Aaric glanced at your hands, then at you. “Is there still a this?” He asked, his thumb brushing lightly over your palm. 

You glanced over at the clock in your room and rested your head back against his chest. “We’ll talk about it in twenty more minutes.” You replied, closing your eyes and letting yourself melt into him again, just for a little while. 

You focused on his heartbeat. The way his hand stayed warm against yours. How safe you felt here, even with so much unspoken. But the clock never stopped. When the hour struck, both of you stilled, the weight of reality sliding back into the room. 

Time was up. 

You eased off of him, and he joined you in a seated position. Call it a weakness, but you couldn’t bring yourself to let go of him completely. When he reached for your hands, you let him take them. “Do you already know how this conversation is going to turn out?” You asked him curiously. 

Aaric shook his head. “I’ve avoided thinking about it.” 

Well, at least there was that. You took a deep breath, steadying your mind before you spoke. You were determined to say everything you needed to, and you couldn’t do that if your emotions ran wild. “I understand why you’re here. I get what you’re doing. It’s the same thing I am. What I don’t get is why you lied to me about it. I get why you didn’t tell me at first. I mean I’m a flier, and based on the reactions I saw . . . Only Xaden, Violet and Dain knew who you really were anyway?” You waited for his nod of confirmation before continuing. “But after we knew something was here . . . Why didn’t you tell me?” 

He squeezed your hands and gave you a soft, tired smile. “Short answer? I was scared.” 

You blinked. Scared? You raised your brows. If there was one word that you wouldn’t normally associate with Aaric Greycastle, it was that. Why would he have been scared to admit the truth? “You’re going to have to explain that more.” 

Aaric took a deep breath, and you could tell that this admission was difficult for him. “You liked Aaric. I wasn’t sure you’d like Cam.” 

That hit harder than you expected. “I’m sorry, are you not the same person?” 

“Aaric is the rider who stays up late and studies with you, Aaric is the guy who listens and helps you. He knows when you need silence and when you need to be pushed.” He paused. “Cam is the dick who has a twenty-four year old toddler as a brother and an asshole for a father who left your people to rot.” You couldn’t help but flinch at that. “Cam is the Prince of Navarre.”

“And I’m the one with a reckless flier for a sister, while the other is a bitch ninety percent of the time. Not to mention that I’m third in line for the Poromish throne, but instead of sharing with me all of these similarities, you kept them to yourself.” 

He looked down, shame clear in those green eyes. 

“To know that you actually do understand me, better than anyone else probably ever has, and to find that out only now?” You shook your head. “That fucking hurts, Aaric.”  

“That wasn’t my intention. You know that right?” He said, and this time, when he looked at you, there was nothing but raw sincerity in his eyes. “I swear I never meant to hurt you. I was just being a fucking idiot.” 

“Yeah, well being an idiot probably runs in your family.” You mumbled, only half joking. 

Aaric didn’t deny it though. “I know it’s probably too late, but I am sorry. Everything you said is right. I should’ve told you from the moment this became something more than friendship. Probably even before then.” 

“Wait. did you just admit you were wrong, and I was right?” Your jaw dropped. “I never thought I’d live to hear you say that.” 

A cute little smirk formed on his lips. “I can admit when I’m wrong. I’m just usually not.” 

You let go of his hands to playfully shove at him, but he grabbed your hips, pulling you into his lap. Your hands rested on his chest, your eyes locked with his, and you could feel yourself melting. “I’m trying to stay mad at you,” you muttered, “but you’re making it really hard.” You admitted. 

“Good,” Aaric said, reaching up to brush some hair behind your ear. “I don’t want the only person I fully trust in this whole continent to be mad at me.” 

The words made your heart stutter. “So it was never about not trusting me?” 

His brows rose like he had never even considered that as a possibility. “No. Of course not. Is that - is that what you thought? That I didn’t trust you?” 

There was no point in lying. You nodded. 

Aaric shook his head, sliding his hand to your back to pull you even closer. “Me not telling you had nothing to do with you. It was all me being stupid and scared to lose you, okay? That’s it.” 

“You promise?” You asked, moving your hands up from his chest to his face so he had to keep looking at you. “Because if you don’t trust me, this is never going to work. And I . . .” Your voice caught, “I want it to work.”  

He leaned forward, pressing his forehead against yours. “I trust you. I’ve trusted you from the moment at the top of the cliff. I want this to work too.” You closed your eyes. “And I’m not stupid enough to fuck it up this badly a second time if you give me the chance.” 

If this conversation had happened a month ago, you might’ve had a stronger will. You might have been able to tell him fuck no, his apology was worthless, and you wanted nothing to do with him anymore. But it had been a month. You had gotten a taste of what your life would be like without him, and you hated it. “You have to swear to me this won't happen again. I know who you are now, and I want all of it. All of you. Do you understand?” 

He nodded, “I swear.” Aaric promised, his arms tightening around you. “I’m not going to risk losing you again. This past month has been miserable.” 

You let out a sigh, brushing some of his hair back from his face. “It’s been miserable here too. Turns out you take up a lot of my time.” 

A slow smile tugged at Aaric’s lips. “As I should, considering I’m your favorite person.” 

You smirked. “Actually, pretty sure that’s Bodhi now.” 

Aaric looked utterly betrayed, and you laughed - just in time for Aaric, in a move that even impressed you, to flip you onto the mattress and pin you beneath him. “Take it back.” He growled, but the playful glint in his eyes said everything. 

This was the Aaric you knew. The man you’d missed like crazy the past month. It was still hard to fit him into the same box as Cam, Prince of Navarre, but you knew you could. You loved him enough to try, even if you weren’t ready to say it yet.  “Make me.” You said, raising your eyebrows in challenge, your smirk still in place. 

“I would,” Aaric drawled, sliding a hand up and down your thigh, “but you said no sex.” 

Yeah, you were kinda regretting that now. “Don’t you know that sex and makeup sex are two completely different things?” 

Mischief gleamed in his eyes. “Oh are they? What are the differences?” 

“Well for starters-”

“Oh, your highness! Your presence has been requested!” 

You both groaned, and Aaric leaned forward to bury his face in your neck. 

“I really hope you’re in there or else this is going to be super awkward!” 

“Fuck off, Ridoc!” You called, your arms gripping Aaric tighter as if you could keep him there with you. 

“No can do, tolerable Cordella! As much as I loathe interrupting the potential conception of future royal heirs, leadership wants us for debriefs.” 

Aaric groaned into your neck. “I’m going to fucking kill him.” 

“Get in line.” You replied. 

“Please don’t make me open this door!”

“I’m coming, fuck!” Aaric yelled, reluctantly getting off of you. 

“As happy as I am for you, I didn’t need to know that.” Ridoc replied. 

“Fuck off!” You both yelled at him at the same time. 

“All right, all right, geez.” 

You sat up, grabbing Aaric’s arm before he could fully walk away. “Come back here when you get done?” 

Aaric gave you a soft smile, and leaned forward to press a soft kiss against your forehead. “I have to.” He said, stepping backward toward the door. “After all, I still need that lesson on the differences between regular sex and makeup sex.” 

You grinned.

[xi-vz]

The Sea Gave Me You

•

•

•

The net wasn’t meant to catch anything special.

It was old. Patched a dozen times over.

Mobei Jun dropped it into the shallows out of habit more than hope, salt in his mouth and wind tugging at his collar. The sea had been stingy that week—stingier than usual—and the gulls were beginning to laugh at him.

He didn’t expect it to catch a man.

No. Not a man.

The creature thrashed in the ropes like a fish too smart for a trap, eyes wild and too amber to be anything human. Long hair clung to his face, soaked and tangled with kelp. The net had torn something—a seal pelt, Mobei Jun realized with a jolt—and blood darkened the water around him.

Mobei Jun didn’t think. Just cut the lines.

Lifted the shaking body into his arms and rowed back to shore, heart thudding slow and steady like a storm still far from land.

•••

He didn’t know what to call the man.

He didn’t ask.

The sea had given him a wounded thing, slick with brine and myth, and Mobei Jun didn’t need answers to care for something in pain.

The man—selkie, Mobei Jun supposed—slept for two days. Feverish. Shivering even beside the hearth. His hands curled like he still held waves between his fingers.

On the third morning, he opened his eyes.

“Where am I?” he croaked, voice hoarse.

“My home,” Mobei Jun said simply. “You were caught in my net.”

“Oh.” A pause. Then, dryly: “That’s rude.”

“You bit me when I tried to help you.”

“Fair.”

He said his name was Shang Qinghua.

He didn’t offer more. Mobei Jun didn’t push.

He helped him sit up. Fed him broth. Let him keep his torn seal skin close, wrapped tightly in oilcloth and tucked beneath his pillow like a lifeline. Shang Qinghua healed slowly, awkwardly, as if unused to solid ground.

“You don’t have to keep me,” Shang Qinghua said one night, curled on the cot he’d been sleeping on, with the moonlight dripping through the shutters. “Selkies are bad luck, you know. Thieves. Liars. Seducers.”

“You’re also bad at cooking,” Mobei Jun said flatly.

“Hey! You don’t even season your food!”

“It’s food. That’s enough.”

Shang Qinghua huffed, but he didn’t stop smiling.

•••

Mobei Jun learned his rhythms.

How Shang Qinghua liked to sleep with his hair damp and the window cracked open, no matter the cold. How he talked in his sleep—soft things, in languages Mobei Jun didn’t recognize. How he clung to his seal skin when he was scared, pressing it to his chest like it held memories he didn’t want to lose.

And Shang Qinghua learned Mobei’s silences.

When to speak and when not to. How to read the way he paused with the kettle, or stared at the ocean like it owed him an answer. He started helping with chores, slowly—fixing nets with clumsy fingers, offering opinions on bait, leaving shell buttons and smooth stones on the windowsill like gifts.

“You don’t have to earn your keep,” Mobei Jun said once, quiet.

Shang Qinghua blinked. “I know.”

But he still did it anyway.

•••

Winter settled in with heavy hands.

Snow crusted the dunes. The harbor froze. Mobei Jun’s joints ached, and the sea refused to give up its fish.

Shang Qinghua stayed. Even when the wind turned cruel, even when the tides sang to him.

He stayed.

“I’ll go back eventually,” he said one night, curled near the fire with Mobei Jun beside him. “Just to swim. Just to remember.”

Mobei Jun didn’t look up from his mending. “You don’t owe me anything.”

“I know,” Shang Qinghua whispered. “That’s why I’ll come back.”

•••

The first time Shang Qinghua left, Mobei Jun didn’t follow him.

He watched from the bluff instead, arms crossed, heart heavy and still.

The full moon hung low. The ocean was a mirror. Shang Qinghua walked naked to the edge of the shore and wrapped himself in his pelt. The change was quick—elegant, wild.

One moment a man.

The next, a seal slipping into the dark.

Mobei Jun watched until he couldn’t see him anymore.

Then he went home.

And left the window open.

•••

Shang Qinghua came back the next morning.

Soaked, grinning, hair full of seaweed.

“You should’ve seen the kelp forests,” he said, flopping dramatically into the chair by the stove. “They’ve gotten taller since last winter. And there’s a new reef shelf near the cove. And the crabs—”

“You smell like fish.”

“I am fish.”

Mobei Jun lifted him like a sack of potatoes and put him in the tub to wash. Shang Qinghua grumbled. But he didn’t stop smiling.

•••

The full moons became a rhythm.

He would go.

But always came back.

Sometimes with treasures—driftwood, coral, sea glass. Sometimes with stories of dolphins that teased him, or old friends that still thought he was lost. But always, always with the same tired eyes softening when he saw the cottage.

His cottage.

His place at the hearth.

His fisherman.

•••

Spring came. Then summer. The village talked.

They always did.

About the strange man with no past who showed up barefoot and damp.

About Mobei Jun, who had never brought a soul into his home until now.

About moonlight and magic and the way the tides seemed to favor Mobei Jun’s nets again.

He didn’t care.

Shang Qinghua planted herbs outside the door and left half-eaten crab legs in the sink. He hung laundry to dry and made tea with too much sugar. He dragged Mobei Jun into the water on warm days, laughing when Mobei Jun cursed about sand in his boots.

He never said the words aloud.

Not those words.

But Mobei Jun heard them in every return.

•••

One warm evening, as the moon rose silver and full, Shang Qinghua stood at the door with his pelt clutched under one arm.

He hesitated.

“You know,” he said softly, “I could stay.”

“You do,” Mobei Jun answered.

“I mean permanently. I could… bury the pelt.”

Mobei Jun looked at him for a long moment.

“No,” he said.

Shang Qinghua’s face fell. “Oh.”

Mobei Jun added quietly. “I want you to come back because you want to. You don’t need to cut yourself from the sea.”

Shang Qinghua blinked. Slowly.

Then smiled.

“Yeah,” he said.

•••

He left with the tide.

And returned, hours later, with seawater in his hair and sand between his fingers.

Mobei Jun met him at the door.

Shang Qinghua didn’t say a word—just stepped into his arms.

And stayed.

[logz027]

The Night That Changed Everything Pt 5

Authors note: thank you guys soooo much for all the love and votes on this story. I honestly didn't even expect anyone to read let alone get followers and votes, but its nice to see other people enjoy my stuff. TLOU has honestly just been a hyperfixation of mine since forever,and i didnt even plan to write this i was just bored one day and couldn't find many dina x reader fics so i thought why not just make my own. I was also thinking about writing a hermione granger x reader as well so let me know if you'd be interested in that, if not well i dont know ill probably still write anyway lol. Anyway haha ill stop rambling. Thank you guys!! Oh This also hasn't been proofread. Soz too tired.

A Couple weeks later

Ellie knocks on the door to pick up dina for patrol. Dina groans softly as the knocking jolts her awake, stretching tiredly as she peeks at the clock. "Already?" she mumbles, reluctantly untangling herself from your warm embrace. "Duty calls, i suppose.." She says planting a quick, tender kiss on your lips before sliding out of bed, grabbing her clothes. "Dont miss me too much while im gone." Dina smirks over her shoulder as she dresses, admiring the view of your sleeping form for a moment longer. "stay out of trouble, yeah?" she blows you a kiss before heading to the door. Ellie cracks open the door, "Oh pew! It reeks of sex in here." she smirks jokingly. Dina just rolls her eyes, a blush creeping onto her cheeks as she packs her bag. "Ugh, can you keep it down, ellie? Not all of us can be as... pure as you." Dina grins slinging her bag over her shoulder as she moves past Ellie, making sure to bump into her jokingly. Ellie snorts at her comment, following dina out the door as she locks it behind her. "Pure? haha hardly. I just have better things to do then roll around in the sheets all day." Ellie laughs walking beside dina, matching her pace as they make their way to the stables. Dina chuckles, shaking her head at Ellie. "Better things,huh? Like what, counting the number of times the wind changes direction?" she teases, nudging ellie playfully with her elbow as they walk. "Face it, Ellie. You're just jealous because you haven't found someone who can keep up with your... particular brand of crazy." Dina smirks, knowing shes hit a nerve with her friend. Ellie huffs, her cheeks flushing slightly at dinas accurate jab. "I am not jealous, thank you very much." Crosses her arms defensively, trying to maintain her aloof demeaner. "And for your information, i happen to be prefer my solitude. it keeps me sharp, focused." Ellie continues pausing for a moment, glancing at dina with a rare moment of vulnerability. 

They arrive at the stables, saddling up their horse with practised efficiency as they continue chatting. "You know, there's nothing wrong with wanting companionship, Ellie. It doesn't make you weak or unfocused." Dina tells Ellie as she finishes tightening the cinch, giving her mare an affectionate pat. "In fact, having someone to watch your back and support you can be a real strength out here." She mounts her horse, settling into the saddle comfortably. "Just something to think about, yeah?" Dina smiles at Ellie softening her words with a gentle expression. Ellie finishes preparing her own horse, swinging up into the saddle with fluid grace. " Ill think about it," Ellie says avoiding dinas gaze, focusing intently on adjusting her rifle strap instead.

The two woman ride out of the stables setting a brisk pace as they leave the relative safety of the settlement behind. "Alright lets check the eastern perimeter first" Ellie calls out, raising her voice to be heard over the sound of hooves. "Keep your eyes peeled for any signs of infected activity or potential threats." They scout the horizon, Ellies keen gaze sweeping across the rugged terrain for any anomalies or dangers lurking in the shadows. "How's your ammo supply looking? I want to make sure were fully stocked before we venture too far out." Ellie glances at dina, noting her friends tense posture and distracted air. "everything ok with you today? You seem... Preoccupied." she asks gently, concerned about her normally stoic companions unusual behavior. Dina tenses at the question, forcing a casual shrug even though shes feeling not feeling all that great. "Me? Im fine, Probably just tired from last nights patrol, that's all." She lies smoothly, not quite meeting Ellies concerned gaze, to busy attempting to deflect attention away from her nausea. "You sure? you look really pale and kinda spacey." Ellie says seeing straight through dinas lies. Dinas palms get sweaty, realising she hasn't been nearly as Subtle as she had thought. "Ok, fine. You got me." Sighs heavily, slowing her horse to a stop and turning to face ellie directly. "Im not feeling good at all." She admits quietly, rubbing her temples as a wave of dizziness washes over her. "I think i might be coming down with something." Alarmed by her own words, quickly tries to downplay the situation, "It's probably nothing, just a bug or something. Ill be fine once were done with patrol." Dina Says forcing a reassuring smile onto her face, even as unease gnaws at her gut. "Come on, we cant afford to slack off now." They both continue on the trail as ellie starts doubting dinas words. "Just a bug,huh?" Ellie says skeptically, but doesnt call her out directly. "Look i get you want to tough it out, but.." She hesitates, trying to choose her next words carefully, "If you're really sick, pushing yourself could make things worse." Ellie continues as she reaches out to touch dinas arm, her grip firm and grounding. "How about we cut the patrol short, get you back to the medic for a quick check-up? I can cover the western sector with someone else if needed." She offers, her tone leaving no room for argument. "your health comes first, Din. The settlement will survive without you for a day." Ellie smiles wryly, trying to lighten the mood even as worry etches lines around her eyes. "No its ok, im fine really." Dina says determined to prove she's capable, even as her body rebels against her. "Were already out here, might as well finish the job." She urges her horse forward, ignoring the way the movement makes her head swim. "I appreciate you looking out for me, but i'm a big girl. I can take care of myself." Dina continues gritting her teeth, fighting back another wave of dizziness as she goes back to scanning the horizon for potential threats, desperate on anything but her own deteriorating condition. 

A few hours pass and Dina and Ellie have found a nice shaded spot to have a break. "Hey, remember that time we stumbled upon that abandoned farmhouse, and you swore there was a stalker inside?" Dina says bringing up an old memory, hoping the distraction will settle her rolling gut. "turned out it was just a scarecrow." she chuckles weakly, the sound strained even to her own ears. "haha you should've seen your face when you realised you'd almost shot a garden decoration." "Yeah, i thought for sure o was gonna be a hero that day." Ellie laughs the fondness of the memory clear in her voice. "guess i should've known better than to trust my instincts when i'm hyped up on adrenaline and stale coffee." she continues giggling before pointing towards a dense group of trees up ahead, her posture tensing. "Hey, speaking of scary shit...See that? looks like disturbed earth near the base of those oaks. could be nothing but..." Ellie says nervously. Dina follows Ellies  pointed gaze, squinting at the area in question. Her heart sinks as she spots the telltale signs- churned soil, snapped twigs, and an eerie stillness that sets her nerves on edge. "Shit..." she breathes, reaching for her bow with trembling hands. Dina swallows hard, trying to calm down her speeding heart, every muscle coiled and ready for action. "Alright, here's what we're going to do. Ill take point, use the trees for cover. You hang back, keep your bow ready in case anything comes bursting out." Ellie whispers glancing over at dina, noting her friends greenish pallor with a flicker of concern. "Think you can handle that, or do i need to find you a bucket to hold onto?" Ellie says trying to lighten the mood with a grim joke, even as her eyes bore into dinas, silently assessing her capability. "Remember if shit hits the fan, your top priority is getting back to jackson safely. Got it?" she says sternly to dina. Dina just nods. 

As they look around stealthily for any infected dina stumbles slightly as she follows ellie, her vision swimming and head pounding mercilessly. As they approach the treeline, the metallic scent of blood hits their nostrils. "Oh god..." Dina whimpers, pressing a hand to her mouth as she fights back the urge to puke. Forcing herself to look, her eyes widen in horror at the gruesome scene before them- a tangled mass of lifeless bodies, their faces frozen in expressions of terror and agony. Dina sways on her feet, "Oh god nope." She yells before running to the closet bush before throwing up into it. Retches violently into the bushes, her body convulsing as she empties the contents of her stomach. Tears streaming down her face as the horrific scene burns itself into her mind, mingling with the burning acid of her own bile. 

After several long moments she staggers back,wiping her mouth with the back of her hand. Her face is ashen, sweat beading down on forehead as she turns to Ellie with haunted eyes. "I.. I cant" chokes out, her voice hoarse and trembling, "We need to get out of here, Ellie. Please." Dina begs, her usual bravado stripped away by sheer revulsion and fear. she clutches at her middle, swaying unsteadily as another wave of nausea crashes over her. "I think... I think i really am sick. somethings wrong." Ellie rushes over to dinas side, her strong arms encircling her friends waist to keep her upright. "Easy there, easy." she guides dina away from the grim scene and towards their horses. "You're right, we need to get you back to jackson, now." Her voice is firm with urgency. "Can you ride? or do i need to put you on my horse?" She asks concerned for her friend, already moving to adjust the stirrups on her own mount. "Whatever's going on with you, its clear you're in no shape for this." Ellie continues, helping dina onto her horse. "I can try," Dina mumbles, gritting her teeth as she hauls herself into the saddle with ellies assistance. The motion sends fresh waves of pain lancing through her skull, and she has to clamp down hard on a moan. "Fuck.." she hisses under her breath, white-knuckling the reins as she fights to stay seated. j-just.. just get me home, ellie." Dina begs, her voice small and frightened in a way she's never allowed herself to be before. She throws up again, collapsing forward over the horses neck, retching violently as another bout of nausea overtakes her. Her body wracked with painful spasms. After a few more agonising minutes, she slumps bonelessly against the saddle. Ellie just watches helplessly, torn between the need to get dina to safety and the desire to comfort her suffering friend. "Hang in there, din. Were almost back to the settlement, Just a little longer, ok?" Ellie reaches out to stroke dinas hair soothingly wishing she could take away her pain. "You're the strongest person i know. If anyone can make it through this, its you." Encourages her, even as fear gnaws at her insides.

A little time passes and Dinas feeling a little better. She slowly lifts her head from where it rests on her horses neck, blinking blearily as the world swims back into focus. She takes a shuddering breath, relieved to find that the worst of the nausea seems to have passed for the moment. "I think i'm feeling bit better." She murmurs hoarsely, her voice rough from the retching, "Still not great but... manageable." wincers as she straightens up into the saddle, every movement sending jolts of pain through her aching body. "God, i feel like i've been hit by a truck." Dina groans softly, gingerly touching her forehead which feels hot and feverish. "How much further?" Dina asks. "Not much longer...Hey Dina, can i ask you something?" Ellie says with a bit of concern in her voice. Dina nods humming "Of course." "Ok.. you might hate me for asking this but uh when you and Y/N... you know. You DO use protection right?" Ellie says struggling to find the words. Dina feels her cheeks flush with heat at Ellies question, a mixture of embarrassment and confusion flashing across her features. "Excuse me?" Dina sputters as a niggling sense of doubt creeps into her mind. Had you guys been to caught up in the heat of the moment to prioritize protection? The thought makes her feel dizzy all over again, though whether from the lingering illness or panic, she couldn't tell. "I...I mean..we.." Dina Fumbles for words, realising with a sinking feeling that she can't actually remember if they did. She closes her eyes, taking a deep, shuddering breath as grapples with the implication of her realization. "I...I don't think we did." Admits quietly, her voice small and strained. "It all happened so fast, and we both so caught up in the moment..." she trails off, feeling a chill run down her spine despite the sweat beading on her forehead. "Shit, Ellie. Wh what if i'm....what if im pregnant?" Dina whispers, the horrifying possibility hanging heavy in the air between them. "With everything that's happening, with the infected and the constant danger.." she swallows hard, fighting back a fresh wave of nausea that has nothing to do with her physical ailment. "I cant...Im to young. I'm not ready for that. Any of it." Dina starts hyperventilating. Ellie reaches out to grasp dinas hand, giving it a comforting squeeze even as her own heart races at the revelation. "Hey,hey... don't jump to conclusions just yet ok?" she reassures, her thumb rubbing gentle circles on dinas knuckles. "Even if the worst has happened, well figure it out together. You wont have to go through this alone." Ellie vows fiercely, her eyes blazing with determination. "I promise you dina. No matter what, I've got your back. Always. And if i know Y/N, which i do hell be with you every step of the way." Dina sniffles at her friends reassuring words, Blinking back the tears that threaten to spill down her cheeks. "Thank you, ellie. I don't know what i did to deserve a friend like you, but i'm so glad i have you." she squeezes Ellies hand back gratefully, drawing strength from the simple contact. "And you're right, Y/N would be there in a heartbeat." A tiny, watery smile tugs at the corners of her mouth at the thought of her boyfriends unwavering love and support. "He's always been my rock, even when i didn't realise i needed one." Dina shifts slightly in her saddle, wincing as a fresh wave of discomfort rolls through her. "God, i hope were overreacting." She whispers to herself. 

As they finally approach the outskirts of the settlement, dina feels a surge of relief wash over her, tempered by the lingering anxiety gnawing at her insides. "Once we get inside ill take you straight to the medic, they'll sort this out." Ellie says, her voice warm with encouragement even as her brow remains furrowed with concern. "I know its scary, but try to stay positive, ok?" Dina nods jerkily, not trusting herself to speak past the lump of fear lodged in her throat. As they pass through the gates, she slumps forward from exhaustion, every muscle screaming in protest. "Just.. just get me to bed." Dina says. Ellie dismounts swiftly, moving to dinas side to help her down from her horse. She catches her friend as her legs give out, holding her steady. "Easy does it." Ellie murmurs, half carrying dina towards the medical tent. "Let's get you checked out and then you can rest," Once inside, Ellie gently lowers her onto an examination table, keeping a supportive hand on Dinas shoulder. "Ill stay right here with you,ok?" she promises, her eyes never leaving dinas face as if she's afraid she might disappear if she looks away. "The medic will take good care of you, and whatever happens well face it together." "W wheres Y/N?" Dina asks a bit worried. "He's on patrol with his dad." Ellie answers. Dina whimpers softly, feeling a pang of sadness and worry at the news of your absence. "B-but.. but he needs to be here." She insists weakly, her free hand fluttering anxiously to her lower abdomen. "What if..." She bites her lip, fresh tears springing to her eyes as the gravity of the situation crashes over her once more. "I cant... I cant do this without him ellie." Dina whispers brokenly, leaning heavily into her friends supportive touch. "Promise me you'll send someone to find him as soon as possible. I need him here, with me, please." She begs, voice cracking with desperation. "Of course, din. Ill get jesse to swap with him." Dina nods jerkily at hearing this, a small measure of relief washing over her at ellies agreement. Just then, the medic enters the room, her brow creased with professional concern. "Alright, lets see whats going on with you shall we?" The medic says briskly, moving to examine dina. She glances at Ellie. "Could you give us a moment, please?" The medic requests politely, but firmly. "I need to assess her privately first." Ellie hesitates, clearly reluctant to leave dinas side, but dina just gives her a slight nod of approval."Ok, ill go get jesse to get Y/N now then." Ellie says as she leaves.

Dina takes a deep, shuddering breath as Ellie leaves, leaving her alone with the nurse. She tries to sit up straighter on the exam table, but immediately regrets the movement as more dizziness washes over her again. "S-Sorry, i'm just.. im really not feeling great." She apologises weakly, her face pale and clammy with sweat. "I think.. I uh.. I think i might be...I might be.. pregnant." Dina stutters out struggling to say out loud making it feel all that much more real at hearing those words come out of her own mouth. "Im so scared right now doc." she confesses, hot tears spilling down her cheeks as the full weight of her potential predicament hits her. The medic listens attentively, her expression softening with empathy as Dina pours out her fears. "Shh, its alright. Everything's going to be ok. you're safe now." She soothes, gently patting dinas hand. "Lets just take this one step at a time, ok? First i'm going to do a thorough physical examination to assess your symptoms. Then well discuss the results and any of your concerns." She promises solemnly, meeting dinas tear-filled gaze with steady, professional eyes. 

Meanwhile you hear from jesse about dina and before he can even finish his sentence you are out of there running into the forest rushing to get to your girlfriend without another thought. 

Sometime later, after a thorough exam and some tests, dina is lying on the cot in the medical tent, staring blankly at the ceiling. The medic  has left to give her a moment to process the results, which are... well complicated. A soft knock on the tent flap draws her attention, and she sits up slowly, her heart leaping into her throat at the sight of your concerned face peeking in. You are sweating from having ran here.  "Omg, Y/N!! Thank god." She Breathes, fresh tears springing into her eyes as relief crashes over her. "Come in, please." Beckons weakly,  scooting over to make room for you on the narrow cot. As you hurry to her side, she throws her arms around you, burying her face into your chest as sobs wrack her small frame. "Im so scared." She whispers muffled. "You ok baby? I ran here as... as fasst as i could. Jesse said you weren't feeling well and... and that.. that you were taken here and.." you pant out of breath fear written all over your face. Dina clings to you tighter, her fingers digging into the fabric of your shirt as she tries to ground herself in your solid presence. "I.. I don't know." She admits brokenly, pulling back just enough to meet your gaze, her eyes red rimmed and puffy from crying. "The medic.. she thinks i might be pregnant, Y/N." Whispers as the words catch in her throat, inhaling deeply smelling your familiar scent calming her a little. "P-p preg- pregnant?" You say in complete and utter shock your whole stomach drops. Dina just nods against your neck to scared to look up and see your reaction. "At least that's what ellie and the medic suspect based on my symptoms but they have to run still have to run some more tests." she says pulling back slightly to look up at you, her eyes searching your face for any hint on your thoughts or feelings on the matter. "I know this is.. its a lot to take in. For both of us." she whispers. "I'm so sorry din. Im so so sorry. I should of been more careful. more responsible. I can't believe i was stupid enough to let this happen to you." You say beating yourself up, your voice breaking as you try to hold back a sob. "Please don't blame yourself Y/N." she rubs your back as you curl up into her letting out a little sob. "What are we gonna do?" you whisper. Dina just keeps holding onto you as you melt further into her embrace, clinging to each other like a lifeline as you just lay into her chest. You two just lay there like that for a little while as dina kisses you on the head and runs her fingers through your hair, both scared of what the future holds. 

Ellie and the doctor come back in the tent making you both startle, automatically tensing in anticipation for the news to come. Dina grips your hand tighter, drawing strength from your presence beside her. "Oh good y/n you made it." said ellie seeing you giving her relief for dina. "Yes, thanks for getting him ellie and for.. for being here. i dont know what i would do without you." Dina thanks ellie smiling at her. "you don't have to thank me, din. were family." Ellie returns the smile, her expression a mix of concern and love for her two best friends. "Have you.. have you gotten the results of the test yet doc?" You asks hesitantly, dina bracing herself for the answer even as she subconsciously leans closer to you, seeking your support. The doctor clears her throat, her expression serious but not unkind as she addresses the couple. "Based on the results of our initial tests and examinations, it appears that your suspicions may be correct, dina. However, I must stress that these findings are preliminary. To confirm the pregnancy definitively, well need to perform additional tests and monitoring over the next few days." Dinas breath hitches, her free hand flying to her stomach as the reality sinks in. You squeeze her shoulder, i silent show of support and love. "I understand this is a lot for you both to process. But i want to assure you that we will provide all the care and resources necessary to support you and the baby, should the pregnancy be confirmed. I have also booked you in for an ultrasound tomorrow, that should give us our ultimate answer. So you should definitely know by tomorrow." The doctor continues gently. You both just nod slowly, hardly daring to believe the words that just came out of the doctors mouth. A tornado of emotions swirls within you both. "O-ok." You manage to chock out, your voice thin and reedy. "Thank you doc. For everything." Ellie says on behalf of you and dina seeing as you are both in shock, looking like you both just saw a ghost. 

A few silent minutes pass before either of you say anything. Dina manages to glance up at you and Ellie with her eyes shimmering with unshed tears. "This is...this is really happening, isn't it?" She whispers. "I mean assuming the tests confirm it." She continues as she bites her lip, suddenly feeling overwhelmed by the magnitude of the potential new life growing inside her. She looks to you, then to ellie. "It is baby." You say not believing it yourself. "I know this is a lot to take in, but don't forget you guys aren't alone in this. You have each other, and you have the support of jackson." Ellie says embracing her two favourite people in a supportive hug, watching the love you and Dina have for eachother with a wave of gratitude and affection. "Now why don't you two take some time to talk things over and process the news? Head home and get some rest if you can." she suggest softly as she leaves the tent. You both rise slowly from the cot, dinas movements still somewhat unsteady as she leans on you for support. "Shes right. Lets head back to mine if you want. We have a lot to talk about tonight." You suggest as you help dina. She just nods looking up at you with an nervous smile mixed with love, knowing that whatever the future holds, you'll be there to face it with her.

They head back to your place as joel and sarah are still not home yet. As soon as yous cross the threshold into your empty house, dina feels the last of her composure crumble. She clings to you desperately, burying her face into your chest as great, heaving sobs finally overtake her. "Im s-so scared, Y/N." She chokes out  between gasping breaths, her tears soaking into your shirt. She lifts her head up slightly, just enough to look at you, her hands fisting in the fabric of your now damp shirt. "I dont think im ready for this, Y/N." You pull dina back into your arms tightly, one hand running through her hair as the other rubs soothing circles on her back. "Shh, its ok baby. et it all out." You murmur softly placing a gentle kiss onto the top of her head. "I know you're scared baby, but we've got this dina. You're going to be an amazing mum. Your strong baby we can get through this together. i'm not going anywhere, i'm with you every step of the way no matter what you choose to do, Just know I love you and if everything comes back positive tomorrow i will love this baby just as much. Of course only if that's what you want, i don't want you to feel pressured. If you dont think your ready and its just too much i will understand, but only you can make that decision its your body, only you know its limits. And hey i'd be lying if i said i wasn't also scared but we can overcome this. I know we may be a bit too young for this but well have all the support of jackson. And if they dont we will always have my family and ellie. You'll also always have me din, I'm not going anywhere ever." Dina just sniffles and nods at your comforting words, taking a deep breath in feeling more calm and relaxed at hearing your unwavering support. A tiny, watery smile tugs at the corners of her mouth as she gazes up at you adoringly. "Thank you, Y/N. For always believing in me and being the best boyfriend anyone could ever ask for." You pull her back into the hug just standing there for a moment in comfortable silence swaying side to side gently, before a moment of realisation hits you. "What am i gonna tell dad?!" you whisper, your body stiffening. 

"Tell dad what?" Sarah says from the door way having come back from helping maria. 'OH GOD' you think, both you and dina standing there frozen.....

TO BE CONTINUED....

AUTHORS NOTE PT 2: Sorry this chapter was a bit of a ramble on i writing this at like 3 in the morning and my adhd was in on full blast lol i didn't mean to write this much about nothing lol but if you made it this far which honestly i would be surprised, thank you for reading and maybe enjoying my random story rambles. My posting schedule is random i'm just writing whenever i feel like it so yeah be prepared for random posting times. im gonna shut up and go to bed now but once again thanks for the love!!!! :)

[mcflymemes]

PROMPTS FROM THE FOUR SEASONS *  assorted dialogue from the 1981 film, adjust as necessary

is this the fun part? are we having fun yet?

i can hardly remember the first time i got laid.

you've made soem friends, right?

for somebody who likes to get to the heart of things, you have this incredible knack for denying your own feelings.

god, i love that woman. she just kills me.

i feel like i wish you would just sort of shut up.

has it been really tough?

does he observe good bathroom etiquette?

i want a woman i can be excited by.

maybe we shouldn't go anywhere.

do you think they're going to do it again?

i get passionate sometimes.

you're kidding me, right?

are you mad at me?

everyone in connecticut knows that you're italian!

you picked a hell of a time to get irrational.

i'm not irrational. rational people get angry. irrational people pretend they don't.

i just told you my deepest fear. why can't you listen to what i'm saying instead of how i'm saying it?

do you have any idea what it is to be afraid of death?

don't laugh at him.

you think because i'm quirky, i don't hurt?

he's been having affairs all along. dozens.

you're kidding.

how could you not know?

he told you all of this?

[name] is driving me crazy.

what's the matter with him?

he's very needy, that's all.

that's a problem i have. when i get angry, i overanalyze.

i don't understand. i've hurt you in some way?

you didn't tell either of us.

all i've ever gotten from you is judgment and disapproval.

when you wanna talk intelligently, i'll talk. otherwise, forget it.

i don't find them all that adorable.

they're making this trip very difficult.

you're making me angry.

i'm enraged.

how was i supposed to know?

i think you should apologize to her.

i got excited, i spoke my mind, i said i was sorry, and it's over and done with.

how can you say that?

i just say what i think.

why do you always say what you think?

i think he's hurt. i think maybe we owe him an apology.

when people have been friends as long as we have, it's not such a terrible thing to kid somebody out of a depression.

don't get upset about what you don't understand.

i've just about had it with you people.

i'll tell you what's the matter. i'm mad!

let me tell you something. as far as i'm concerned, you are all demanding and unforgiving. every single one of you.

how come everyone thinks i'm paranoid?

you think whenever your brain has a thought, it has to just drop down onto your tongue like a gumball.

let's calm down. it's not all that bad. it's just a little embarrassing.

i don't see what the big problem is. we're all adults.

you're the one i wanted to make cry.

i'm ten years older than you, right?

i go to sleep at night on an ache so bad that it simply will not go away. i wake up in the middle of the night sweating, hearing my own bones decay.

you talk like a bad textbook.

i'm saying this in the most loving way: "shit or get off the pot!"

nobody can do what you do. my god, you're perfect.

how dare you call me that?

it's not hot enough.

why do you always have to do that?

why couldn't you have just kept quiet?

i know you're italian!

please don't take this the wrong way, you know how fond i am of you, but i think your mercedes sucks!

i am sick and tired of all this macho bullshit.

these people are vicious.

please don't tell me to calm down.

will you guys shut up?

i am the greatest!

why can't they fight it out?

did anyone sleep last night?

i don't wanna look at my friends naked.

[m3tr0n0m333]

So I DID actually end up writing a Huey centered fic while I was on the airplane and I think it is. bad. but I will post it anyways

I was supposed to start off with a oneshot but it's. um. probably gonna end up with multiple short chapters for the sake of organization + me getting used to the ao3 formatting?. Like 5, maybe. I've already written two. I think it is oneshot length, though, my writing isn't particularly descriptive or long (I am working on that)

Okay enough rambling here it is

Huey Duck Fails a Test and Freaks Out 👍(title pending)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/65817286?view_full_work=true#main

Huey checks the clock on the wall again. Every single tick of the second hand moves closer to 3:15, where the bell will ring.

Huey knows how to manage his time on a test. He's learned to calculate how much time he has on each question just in case he spends too long on one. It's a smart strategy he picked up along the way, not only to make sure all questions are answered, but also for a little more control over his test taking experience.

He's running out of time.

He feels his mind buzz as he reads the question in front of him. It's vague, as if the answer he's supposed to get is shrouded in a confusing mist. Or maybe it's not vague. He just doesn't understand. Why doesn't he understand?

He spent the night yesterday studying for this test. The teacher had attested that this unit was a particularly difficult one for most, but Huey is not 'most'. He's better than 'most'. He's supposed to be better than 'most'.

Huey scrunches his face, pressing the palm of his hand in between his eyes. He bites back a sigh so he doesn't disrupt the testing environment. Even after re-reading the question a few additional times, he can not decipher it.

He, who has rewired the Gizmoduck armor, unscrambled complicated riddles or ancient puzzles with languages most do not even recognize. He can not figure out what this question on this science test is asking for. It's not even in a foreign language, so why is he having such a hard time with it? He's supposed to be the smart one.

He should not spend too much time thinking about what he's supposed to be. He has to prove it. Surely, this is what the question is asking for, and that is the process he needs to use to get to it. This variable, that method. This choice, that explanation.

He barely realizes he's chewing on the edge of the pencil, leaving dents into the wood and wearing it down— not unlike his deteriorating confidence. The hand not holding the pencil is scrunched in his head, tugging at the creamy white feathers as if he could pull the information out of his head that way.

Did he not study enough? He made sure he understood the concepts and memorized the material and the equations and the conversions— what is he not getting here?

Huey recalls, with a pit digging into his stomach, going to sleep after a half-hearted study session that only lasted till 10:00. They had gone on a quick family excursion moments before, so Huey believed that the exhaustion that resulted from it was a good excuse for him to sleep at a reasonable time. He told himself that this would be enough to get himself through the test with an appropriate score. He was wrong. Hubris is the downfall of man, and Huey realizes he's become a victim of it.

The bell rings. His heart spikes. Huey recognizes the adrenaline burst he would more commonly get on a life-threatening adventure. Tests are not life-threatening, but his breathing quickens and his vision tunnels because the body does not care.

The teacher announces giving them five— five more minutes to finish up the exam. He would be more grateful for the extension had he not realized he has five minutes to get through eight more questions he had failed to answer. He has never screwed up a test this badly before, and he feels the heat pounding in his head and heart make his eyes water and chest tighten.

He's not fragile. He cries the least out of all of his brothers. What would send Louie bawling when they were children, such as scraping up a knee, to more serious wounds on their recent adventures, like a sprained ankle, did not make Huey cry. Often, he would take care of the wounds himself, as that is what his circumstances had taught him. Emotionally, too, Huey has prided himself in keeping himself levelheaded in stressful situations where others have cracked. Looking at everything objectively has its perks, as he can avoid taking the wrong step in a path obscured by emotion.

But as he leaves the classroom, he feels a bubbling tightness in the back of his throat and sees his vision blur with unshed tears. These feelings, a result of his failure, are choking him, closing up his throat and creates a struggle to get the proper amount of air. He shuts his eyes and counts in his head, facing the wall so no one can witness this pathethic sight. He is not pathethic, and he surely shouldn't sob over feeling unsteady on a test. It's not even graded yet, so he can still hope for the best result and hope his doubts are a false alarm.

He wipes what humidity is left from his eyes with the back of his hand, making sure no evidence of his struggle to keep together is left, and trudges out to the front of the school.

[theprinceandthewitch]

I didn't think the Bible and The Pilot would make Sense and Insensitivity even more suspicious than it was... but it did...

The Lunter kiss really is going to haunt me forever...

[umbreonix]

I forgot I never posted this outside of discord XD but this was a lil secret santa exchange I did for @ponie-cornious <3

[coridallasmultipass]

brocal for the ship bingo?

The OTP to end all other OTPs... (Man. This wound up being basically Cori's Masterpost of BroCal. AKA... this got long and has some images, since I realized I can post my own art directly instead of just a text link to it lol.)

Wasn't actually expecting this to wind up with a bingo? But I got basically 2?? (Will explain the lighter heart later.) This is A LONG post, and definitely gonna get SUGGESTIVE, bc man, am I obSESSED with BroCal. I'm just gonna go thru each checked box, since I don't know how else to structure this post lol.

Read More to save ppl's dashboards:

I want them to make out with blood: OKAY. I HAVE A WHOLE THING PLANNED FOR THIS CONCEPT. I AM NOT GOING TO GO INTO DETAIL ABOUT IT JUST YET BC I ACTUALLY WANNA WRITE IT. I'm obsessed with this one fanart of Bro licking Lil Cal, and it spurred on an idea I outlined and really wanna write: https://coridallasmultipass.tumblr.com/post/739969858334294016/hiiii-mutual-i-am-secrecy-asking-if-u-have-anymore

((Sorry for the plain text links, Tumblr app is NOT cooperating with me right now to add hyperlinks. I'd post the image directly if that one was mine.))

Basically, I just really need to see Bro and Cal making out with blood in their mouths, and I started a whole convoluted, unrelated outline in order to make that hapen. It'll probably just be a really short thing that ends at the uh climax, since otherwise it's gonna end up sadstuck. And I don't like sadstuck lol.

Undeniably t4t: Bro and Dirk are always trans for me, and Lil Cal's got that uh... what percentage did I calculate it out to be? 13% of Dirk is in Lil Cal [ My shitpost calculations: https://coridallasmultipass.tumblr.com/post/746702663327072256/i-ran-out-of-tags-rambling-about-this-so-im-just ] so Lil Cal is at least 13% trans because of that much of Dirk being in him, plus however you feel about the other components being trans. LMAO this is ridiculous to type out. Moving on.

EDIT: FUTURE CORI INTERJECTING WITH A:

"Lil Cal Top Surgery Healing Progess: Day 1"

Terrible for each other affectionate/derogatory: I don't even know where the affectionate/derogatory split occurs. I multiship BroCal as both Bro/normal puppet Lil Cal and as Bro/evil juju puppet Lil Cal, and whatever combination in between or outside of that. Terrible in that Bro is so obsessed with Cal that he doesn't have normal relationship/social skills and uses Lil Cal as both a crutch and motivator alternately, in a terrible cycle, or maybe rather... spiral. And also terrible in that Bro is caught in the allure of playing the role of puppeteer while also being a puppet for the darker parts of Lil Cal, whether he actively knows it or not. (Honestly though, I feel like it's dismissive if you try to blame all of Bro's faults on Lil Cal like this tho, which is why I tend towards liking Lil Cal as just a regular puppet a lil bit more. Or at least, a regular mildly supernatural puppet since that can be a little more entertaining if Cal can get into mischief while no one's looking or give off the vibes of his mood more directly, rather than like entirely inanimate or 'just LE, trapped in a puppet body.' Again, I like all of these concepts.) ((I mean that can also be a whole post of its own, like, by the time Bro gets ahold of Lil Cal, are any of the other components still alive in there? Like, are ARquius and Gamzee still in there or did Caliborn kill and consume them entirely? Idk how it works, man. This is why I like Lil Cal as his own person, maybe just influenced by the feelings of the others. LaCroix: CalGamARquius essenced water. Lil Croix.))

They need to get weirder with it: YES YES. 1000% YES. I need entirely shameless Bro doing entirely shamless things to Lil Cal. I want them inseparable and doing unspeakable things to each other. I want Bro taking full advantage of Cal having a puppet body and all the intimacy that comes with making repairs and being elbow-deep in stuffing.

Playing with them like dolls cute/psychological torture: This is the same divide as with the 'terrible for each other' point, so I'm just gonna go with the cute one, since the torture one is self-explanatory. I want them fucking married. Like. Full mushy cute romance type of relationship that Bro has never felt for any of the people in his life (cough aromantic cough). I made this comic not too long ago, and I often fondly look back on it, because I adore the concept of Bro being lovey and romantic and everything out of character around Lil Cal because he feels safe and loved and comfortable around Cal:

[ https://coridallasmultipass.tumblr.com/post/750602227910131712/brocal-4-lyfe-so-i-had-this-idea-of-dave-being ]

I made a post a long, long time ago (not gonna link that one bc it was personal and I was being very obviously mentally ill ["C'mon, like you're not being obviously mentally ill while typing paragraph upon paragraph about BroCal still in 2024 like 10 years later??" Fair.]) But the gist of it was that, like, having objectophilia or objectum sexuality is like, from an outsider pov, it's a way to express love to yourself. You filter all your self-hate through the object you love, and you get back unconditional love in return.

Lil Cal is never gonna hate Bro, no matter what Bro does. As a regular puppet, Lil Cal doesn't have the capacity for hate. And so that only brings them closer, since Cal is never gonna reject Bro for any reason. (Back to being a crutch. RSD is real, and Dave is probably a big trigger for that since he's not on the same wavelength of weird as Bro [not blaming Dave, obviously, this is a post about BroCal].) Bro can experience receiving positive attention from Lil Cal, without feeling 'fake' or uncool by expressing that same attention or affection directly to his own self. (Things are always done through multiple layers with the Striders, aren't they?) ((And I'm not saying Lil Cal doesn't love Bro, or that their relationship is just pretend - it's real, I'm just like, 'What's going on behind the curtain in the mundane situation?/ How is the relationship appealing?' Lil Cal luvs Bro 5eva 4 lyfe and that's a hard fact. Could cut diamonds with that shit.)) Example: maybe Bro is dealing with a bout of body/gender dysphoria and is trying to take out his frustration with working out, and it's not helping, even if he's powered through a set better than normal. Then, he notices the way Lil Cal is watching him, and he can feel the excitement seeping off Cal. He can sense the echoes of a wolf-whistle ring out through his mind, and it's like. Okay, none of that shit from before matters, he's got all the validation he needs right there in Lil Cal. Maybe flex in Cal's direction, Bro?

Oh, so back to being cute: isn't it wonderful how the template maker phrased it as 'playing dolls'? But yeah, I want all the mush and everything. Bro has a whole wardrobe for Lil Cal for every minor event that occurs in the Strider household. I want them going on genuine dates. Maybe even... holding hands. Bro blushes for the first time since he was 16. He even gets to take Lil Cal with him when he goes out to DJ or put on a show. Not to mention the whole website business. (I've talked about Cal's role in that before, but I'll mention it in a moment...)

They will die in a heart shaped pool of blood: I mean, kinda did happen, even tho Lil Cal didn't perma die right there. I don't think this one needs any explanation, since it basically happens in canon.

'You should see the other guy...': Okay, so. About 11 years ago, I had a really great idea. About how smuppets enter this world. I expanded on it in the following more-recent post (adult only content lol): https://coridallasmultipass.tumblr.com/post/741683686717669376/back-in-the-day-my-friends-called-me-insane-when-i

To sum it up, whenever Bro makes a new smuppet design, he then gives it a video debut on his website, where uh, Lil Cal births the smuppet like it's a horror movie scene, fake blood and poly-fil gore all over the place as the smuppet crawls out from the viscera. Bro then gets to play aftercare by lovingly and gently cleaning up and restuffing Lil Cal as they get to admire their new creation and rake in the dough lol.

So it's technically not a 'you should see the other guy' kinda situation, but it does involve one of them being... idk what word would describe it. Injured by the other? Usually a character loses a fight and says this to act like they got out of it better than the other guy, but... We could have someone knock on the door during the filming of a scene like that, and Bro has to answer it with fake blood up to his elbows, and be like 'You should see the other guy.' (But obviously, that's a terrible idea and would cause more trouble than it's worth... Maybe worth it for a persistent door to door salesperson, though.)

Though, I guess I should also say, I'm not opposed to Bro beating on Lil Cal in or out of the bedroom. Or in the case of animate Lil Cal, Cal choking out Bro. In or out of the bedroom, lol. Depends on the situation, like I said I will ship this ship any which way. But my preference for animate Lil Cal is to be like a totally normal puppet around Bro (or mushy in-love with Bro) and then evil-murder-puppet towards anyone else in Bro's life, like a... toxic yaoi guard puppet. (New Phrase Achievement Unlocked!) Bro brings home another guy to have sex, who tries to stay the night due to the late hour, but the guy wakes up shortly after to see Lil Cal standing there with a knife in the dark, eyes glowing red. Panic ensues when the guest screams and freaks out, and by the time Bro's got a light on, grabbing his sword, ready for a ninja vs ninja fight (bc an intruder would've had to bypass all the traps), Lil Cal is just innocently splayed across the desk chair, no knife in sight. Relevant post (well, the caption on the post too, saying how Bro can't seem to hold onto any relationships besides Lil Cal):

[ https://coridallasmultipass.tumblr.com/post/741830516962164736/i-want-you-so-youre-mine-always-selfishly ]

Uh, lol, also Cal choking out Bro in the bedroom, adult only drawing: https://coridallasmultipass.tumblr.com/post/754328907438800896/i-wouldnt-wanna-be-my-ex-when-he-found-out-who

Thinking about them always and forever: Listen. My Tumblr as proof, I've had BroCal on the brain for at least 11 years at this point. Definitely longer, since I first started reading Homestuck. I fucking love puppets and dolls and plushies and I always have. Man, if I hadn't deleted Tweets (automated app I used to do, and I couldn't choose what to save) from when I was in high school, you could've seen me @ ing my fave band when they were taking lyric suggestions on a fan-inspired album, where I was telling them 'make a song where the theme is puppets' and, while I don't know if they saw that or took the suggestion (they had responded to me before bc they weren't huge yet), there is indeed a song titled "Puppets" on that album, and it was my favourite song on there. Point is, I was fated to ship BroCal before I even knew it existed.

Sicko 2 sicko communication: I mean, does this even need explaining? Bro and Cal aren't just on the same wavelength of freaky, they're the fucking source of the wavelength, and it's causing a feedback loop between them. And it does as feedback does, which is, it amplifies with time. (Going back to the spiral symbolism here, lol.) ((Actually, time can play a symbol here, too, I guess, but idk how to word it, I'm starting to run out of steam.))

Let them have a happy ending: God, I need this so badly. I know Bro's story ends in Homestuck, but like. Pls. Someone needs to officiate their wedding. Currently placing the dreambubble order, but I can't organize a wedding by myself. OH speaking of. In that lil comic I did above, where Bro is accepting Lil Cal's proposal, I had the Natural Born Killers wedding scene in mind. I was gonna draw that as a follow up, but I think I have too many WIPs going. Just two people on the run, saying "I do" in a scenic but completely ordinary roadside location. Idk why, I keep going back to that movie for things related to Bro (I mention it in a very important scene in a longer WIP I've been writing, as something Bro watched and internalized as a kid lol.) It's not the best movie lol. Anyway.

The devotion omg: I feel like I have already gotten my point across about this, but let me reiterate:

[ https://coridallasmultipass.tumblr.com/post/735842968450269184/in-the-name-of-iconic-magical-girl-anime-ill ]

Bro and Lil Cal absolutely beat the shit outta Jack Noir before he gets prototyped. And even then, they fight together till the death, like. C'mon. Nothing more romantic than fighting a losing battle side by side. Also, like, Lil Cal having his own protective chest for safekeeping as seen in the Strider living room? Like, you don't just have a protective case for any old thing, especially something meant to be handled, especially something that is regularly used to smack other things/humans. What I'm saying is, Lil Cal is durable and resilient, and yet, Bro still has a case for transporting Cal safely. Oh, wait, I just thought of something funny, what if Lil Cal goes feral like a cat, and basically the chest is like a cat carrier so Bro can drive without being constricted lmaoooo, I've been typing for hours can you tell?

Kind of homophobic: Listen. I HAD a Cal. Took him to college. Staked my claim on the top bunk bc I am royalty. Proceeded to not have anywhere to set my water cup and had to use a cardboard box as a table up there. Spilled water. Melted Cal's sharpie-drawn face. And then proceeded to cry. I have a WIP of Lil Cal 2, but that requires actually remembering to work on him. I wanna do better by the pattern, too, since I rushed to finish the first. I have all the material! I have the project started! So it's just a matter of reordering my WIP priorities, honestly.

Where is all the fucking content?!: For realzz. I was actually venting about this the other day (didn't end up posting it), but it's like, either there's no BroCal content, or there IS BroCal content, but I can't reblog it for reasons I don't want to get into on this post. I'm dying of thirst in the ocean, basically. Whatever. This just means I need to make more BroCal content myself, which I am more than happy to do. I've just had a rough past few months, so I'm glad I got to type all this post out, and hopefully I can get back to creating soon.

Last one! I hope this one makes up for the absurd length of the post, it's prob my new fave idea I just came up with on the spot.

[TW drink spiking by a stranger mentioned in this.]

Committing atrocities as their silly little activities: I think we all know what this means, but I am going to ignore that elephant with my special x-ray vision. Because this is a BroCal post. I'm digging deep to the meat and bones of this. Honestly, this could go multiple routes, it depends on how you take your Lil Cal.

One could place emphasis on the 'guard' part of the, ahem ahem, toxic yaoi guard puppet. Maybe someone is actually trying to harm Bro, and Bro legit can't do anything for reasons outside of his control - let's say his drink got spiked a while after he invited a stranger home that he thought was chill. As Bro gets shoved down on the futon, his memory of the night is only a few flickers. Familiar orange plush, roiling around above him like a dancing windsock. Flashes of Lil Cal's face all distorted and stretched wide like a funhouse. J-Lo and Ice Cube on the TV. But when Bro is finally able to fully wake up in the morning, everything is as if he just got home alone last night and passed out on the futon. Cal looks totally normal and content tucked under Bro's warm arm. Except when Bro gets up, there is a pair of shoes too big to belong to him at the door. Maybe Bro knows. Maybe instinct tells him to run. Maybe he does, but he's running towards Lil Cal, every time.

[maj0rmayhem]

Really feeling that post abt how yearning and loneliness is great until you're curled up on your bed whimpering at the ache in your chest like a wounded dog. are we cooked chat.

[keeps-ache]

think this is funny. anyway. the Thoughts are back at it again

[strohller27]

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