#how can you live yourself when you spread lies

[x1yun4]

Here's a message from your inner child.

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Pile 01.

Eight of Wands in reversed.

What does your inner child want to tell you?

Are you feeling helpless? Do you feel as if there's no hope left, no light shining upon you? Like a once-flourishing flower now wilting in the shadows, yearning for the sun? Life may not seem to be falling into place the way you'd hoped, but deep within, your inner child is whispering for you to let go of these worries. That child, full of innocence and wonder, is reminding you that you're not meant to be weighed down by life's burdens. You're meant to thrive, to experience joy, to have fun. It's easy to become consumed by outcomes, to be so hyper-focused on achieving results that you lose sight of the present. But it's in this very moment that life truly unfolds. The magic lies not in reaching the finish line, although you might believe it does, but in living each step of the journey. You've spent too much time lingering in past memories or future anxieties, neglecting the beauty of the here and now. Your life is not in those distant places. It is in the present moment, where your power lies. Movement is always present, even if it doesn't seem obvious to you. Though you may feel stuck, as though nothing is changing, the world around you is constantly shifting, evolving, and progressing. You may I not perceive it with your senses, but transformation is always occurring. Trust in this unseen movement, and understand that life is happening for you, not to you. Embrace the moment, release your worries, and allow yourself to flow with the currents of now. You are not meant to fade into the shadows, but to bloom in the light.

Pile 02.

Four of Wands.

What does your inner child want to tell you?

Your inner child sees and appreciates all the hard work you put in, but sometimes you just need to step back, unwind, and trust the process. Why? Because success is already within you, and it doesn't require you to exhaust yourself. Trust yourself more instead of believing you need to push yourself to the breaking point, work tirelessly, or endure pain to achieve your goals. These are myths spread by society, suggesting that endless sacrifice is the only way to success. But the truth is, you don't need to suffer to succeed. Let go of the pressure to constantly perform, and instead, allow yourself to be open to help from others. The world is filled with love, even when it doesn't always seem that way. You don't have to bear every burden alone. Reach out, accept support, and recognize that you are not alone on this journey. When you close yourself off, you limit your ability to connect with the abundance of love and assistance that surrounds you. Also, remember that your imagination is the only true reality. The 3D physical world, on the other hand, is always neutral. It only reflects back what you project onto it. By shifting your inner world-nurturing thoughts of self-belief, relaxation, and trust-you can create the reality you desire. Stop letting the external world define your worth or dictate how hard you need to work. Trust that you are enough as you are, and that success is inevitable when you align with your true self, rather than force it from a place of fear or pressure.

Pile 03.

Knight of Pentacles.

What does your inner child want to tell you?

Your inner child is urging you to take responsibility and save yourself from your current state. It's time to stop waiting for someone else to do the work for you, and instead, take action toward your goals. Manifest your desires, shift your mindset, and believe that things can be easier than you think. Set a routine, make changes-anything to get the momentum going that works for you. The worst thing you can do to yourself is to remain stagnant, stuck in the same cycle of inaction (stagnation ≠ taking a break for your own sake). Working hard doesn't mean burning yourself out by working nonstop. Don't fall into the trap of thinking that because you're not "working as hard" as others, your efforts are meaningless, and that you shouldn't even bother trying. Perhaps you're scared of failure, but by not doing anything at all, that is true failure. Stop comparing yourself to others. This journey is yours alone, and it's never been about anyone else. The only person you need to be better than is who you were yesterday. Even taking a single step forward is progress. Even a thought of improvement, a spark of hope, is better than staying in a state of despair without trying to lift yourself out of it. You must avoid developing a victim mindset, where you feel powerless and stuck, but at the same time, don't adopt a mindset that invalidates your pain or struggles. It's crucial to show yourself empathy and compassion, to acknowledge that your feelings are real and valid. But alongside that compassion, you need to start actively working toward what you want. Your inner child is telling you it's time to stop ignoring your own needs and desires. You're sabotaging yourself by remaining passive, and deep down, you know it. Now is the time to start taking the steps, even small ones, to improve your life.

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[dreamtheavenginggatekeeper]

Okay. Now it seems i have to fucking step up on my own damn blog

We never had a “falling out” we stopped sending asks and interacting on tumblr because we forgot about it for a couple years.

We have no memory of any of this fucking BULLSHIT. Because we have never interacted outside of asks except for the timespan we were in the Survivors Network which we left because a mod got mad we kept using the vent chats.

That was when we cut contact.

This other shit above- accusing someone of referring to a younger person as a kiddo as a disgusting pedo or some shit- what the hell is on your mind- that is so fucking disgusting. I guess that every adult who has called every kid in their life as their kiddo is a pedo now according to this person.

I will NEVER see a child in that sort of sight and think oh huh- x disgusting shit that some people may think. Our kiddo is simply a term as to say “hey, this is my kiddo. This is my child. This is someone I see as my own child/kiddo because we cannot adopt or bear children.”

You are right. There are most certainly sides to every person and i get that

I am sorry if you have been getting harassment but accusing someone of bullshit when they were newer to the internet and whatnot.

Accusing them of lying when oh spoilers- the person you are “calling out” was 19-20 or whatever the fuck- it doesn’t mean they were lying when they genuinely don’t remember this shit BECAUSE A GATEKEEPER TOOK THE FUCKING MEMORIES. I TOOK THE MEMORIES BECAUSE IT WAS TOO FUCKING TRAUMATIC TO ADMIT THAT WE HAD MAJOR BLACKOUTS DURING THAT TIME.

This is the one and probably ONLY time i will side with these fuckheads in this body

[secretmellowblog]

People who try to analyze what happened on Tumblr on November 5th, 2020, often really overstate how much it was actually “about” Supernatural. As someone who has never been in the supernatural fandom ever but dID join in on the hysterical destielposting—it was really more about the stress of the pandemic and the 2020 presidential election.

The two biggest Youtubers I’ve seen try to dissect “what happened that November 5th” in video essays both weren’t American—- and I think that explains why they both tried to explain the hysteria primarily via analyzing the Supernatural fandom/the original show, rather than through the lens of the election. And while those videos are cool, valid, informational, and make lots of really well-considered interesting points— I can tell you that me and almost all my mutuals had literally no knowledge or interest in the fact that “oh supernatural had made nods at the ship in the past but the creators were adamant that I wouldn’t be canon” or etc etc etc etc. the first time I learned about any of that context was way later, watching videos where people claimed that fandom history context (that I did not know anything about) was the actual reason for the hysteria.

But the reality is that people latched on to the Destiel stuff because it was a piece of big useless inane zero-stakes fandom news in a time when we were desperately waiting for serious high stakes election news. We were latching onto a “positive “ piece of inane stupid fandom news in a time of great stress, with all the desperation of a drowning man who latches onto whatever piece of wood will keep him afloat.

The core of the hysteria was that Americans (who make up a huge chunk of tumblr’s userbase) were currently glued to their laptops watching the live presidential election vote counts come in. These vote counts were taking an extended amount of time due to the pandemic causing high numbers of mail-in ballots, resulting in a constant state of Election Day Stress for multiple days straight.

This was also during the height of the Pandemic. People had predicted Trump’s presidency would be bad; no one had predicted it would be this apocalyptically bad. No one had predicted pandemics and lockdowns and hospitals overflowing with bodybags. remember Trump spreading Covid lies and conspiracies?? There were so many Qanon conspiracies about democrats being Satanic child traffickers who had to be put to death, and coup threats were mounting from the right wing side. It seemed like this election was a choice between ‘centrist democrat’ and “apocalyptic right wing conspiracy theory authoritarianism,” in the midst of pandemic conditions that people feared would never ever improve— and it seemed like a close election.

Another major point was that Trump voters were more likely to be antimaskers/Covid deniers, while Biden voters were more likely to take the pandemic seriously— so Biden voters were more likely to send in mail-in ballots instead of risking the in-person voting crowds, which meant their ballots would take much longer to count. And so, in many state electoral vote counts, it would initially seem like Trump was very far in the lead— only for Biden to slooooowly build up an agonizingly small lead as the mail in ballots came in, and then defeat Trump at the very end.

So you’re just watching these news sites giving live election updates, refreshing the page every 2 minutes to see if you’re going to live under a spineless centrist democrat or a literal Qanon Dictatorship. And then you go on tumblr to distract yourself, and there’s more election posting, and more agonizing over the votes, and more stress and despair—-

And then it’s been days and we’re right at the crucial tipping point where it’s anyone’s game and the next few hours will determine whether Trump will win, so you need to keep your eye on the vote count, because the next hours will determine the future of the pandemic and your country and your plans for your entire life—

And then stupid Destiel becomes canon! And it becomes canon in the silliest way possible!

If Destiel had become canon at any other time, it would have been a big goofy tumblr celebration? But we wouldn’t have gotten the insane explosion of hysterical interaction.

The entire core of it was the contrast between the inane meaningless stupidity of fandom news vs the actual stressful election news you wanted to hear! It really is best conveyed in that meme where Castiel says “I love you” and Dean indifferently responds with a piece of important election news.

It’s about the contrast between the low-stakes inanity of fandom and the massive life-destroying stakes of a terrifying election. There really was no reason it had be Supernatural specifically, except that Supernatural was a thing everyone knew basic things about from dashboard osmosis— it could’ve been any other equally huge silly fandom ship news about a ship everyone *knew of* but might not necessarily be invested in (ex. Stucky becoming canon, Johnlock becoming canon, Kirk/Spock becoming more canon somehow, etc etc etc.)

I think it’s true that people who weren’t paying agonizingly close attention to the American election news got swept up in it, and that non American Supernatural fans also were extremely excited for purely fandom reasons — but the entire reason it blew up to an unprecedented degree was because of that core of stressed out terrified Americans glued to their computers watching election results and suddenly receiving stupid fandom news instead, and deciding to just hysterically parodically hyper-celebrate this absurd useless zero-stakes news.

I think it was also all elevated by the fact that, as I said before, this happened at the crucial “tipping point” of the election where the next few hours would determine the winner. The fact that Biden began to slowly develop a lead in the hours after made it feel, hysterically, as if the hours after Destiel became canon was somehow the turning point where he began to win; so celebrating Destiel felt like celebrating that slow turn towards victory.

The tl,dr is that it’s so important to Remember the Fifth of November …..in preparation the inevitable hysteria that will happen in the presidential election on November 5th of next year. XD. Personally I’m rooting for Johnlock or Frodo/Sam to somehow become canon in the eleventh hour right before the democrats win

[bunnys-kisses]

my woman

capt. john price

cw: ex husband!price, jealousy, possessive behaviour, breeding, dark-ish themes, baby trapping, dark!john, proceed with caution!!

bunny says: happy birthday to me <3

you couldn't take it anymore. the stress of his job, the lonely nights, the distance was all too much for you. it broke you honestly, you couldn't be that woman for him. the idea of him coming home in a box made you overwhelmed at times.

price understood, he didn't even try to push against the divorce. but that didn't mean that he left you alone. if anything he pushed himself further into your life. that charming smile and those blue eyes, his hearty laugh and his rumble of a voice.

"c'mon, love. who's been over?" he said while standing at your front door. he stood a good head over you, he was broad as well. his eyes were cold as he asked again, "who's been over, lovie?"

you swallowed, "my sister she came over to see how i was doin'. plus, we're not married anymore, i can have whoever i want over."

price looked at you, "i pay for this place, technically i can decide who comes in and who leaves." he brushed past you and walked into the flat. hands in his jeans as he looked around.

you knew you couldn't physically kick him out, it was like an ant pushing a boulder! you stayed far back from him with your arms crossed, "john, get out."

he peeked into the kitchen before he walked in and said, "don't think so, love. i have to make sure that my girl is behavin'." he opened the fridge and pulled out a carton of milk, "oat milk drinker, now?"

your throat tightened, "i had a friend over."

price looked at the carton, "must've been over a lot, or used a lot of milk." he shook the carton, "almost empty."

your stomach flipped. after your divorce you had met a lovely man who worked stable hours and had a winning smile. but price didn't need to know that.

"you bringin' men into my home, fuckin' them on sheets i bought. you whorin' yourself out now, love?" his voice was laced with venom as he put the carton down, "everything you are, i made. from your rank when you were servin' to the home you live in." he got closer to you.

you swallowed, "john, leave."

"no, no." he closed the gap between you two. he took you by the wrists and leaned in, "no woman of mine is gonna be a cheap fuckin' slag."

"i'm not your woman, your girl or your wife."

"then maybe i didn't fight hard enough to keep ya."

your stomach flipped once more. there was something about price that broke your resolve. even after all the pain and heartbreak, he was your husband. so when he kissed you, you didn't push him away.

he picked you up with relative ease, you wrapped your legs around his waist on instinct for fear that he'd drop you. he put you down with a bit of force onto the recliner he loved so.

your face felt heated as you were about to let your ex-husband fuck you.

"my girl on my chair." he chuckled. he remembered the nights where he'd have a beer and watch the football game while you were in between his legs like an obedient little puppy.

he watched you strip of your clothes, his larger hands helped you as you struggled to get out of your sweatpants. poor girl, always needs a mans help. price knew that your limp dicked new man couldn't help the way he could.

he loved the sight of your nude, all the curves and dips. the wetness of your cunt that gleamed in the light of the room. he got his cock out of his jeans and stroked it.

"remember this, love?" he smiled down at you, "i know you're pretty familiar with it." he chuckled, you spread your legs for him like a good wife. he reached over with his free hand and ruffled your hair.

"please, john." you moaned.

he chuckled, "impatient girl, bet ya touched yourself thinkin' of me and lied to your new man about it. bet ya told him that you were more than happy to suck his limp cock. nothin' like mine, eh?"

you looked at him, "there's nothing i could find or buy that felt like you."

he laughed, a full hearty laugh then met your gaze once more, "good." he said, "i'm glad i ruined that pussy of yours. because you're my wife and this is the only cock you'll need." then leaned over you and pushed his cock into you.

you choked out a gasp at the fullness you felt. you could feel it in your stomach. you gripped onto the armrests of the seat as you tried to regain the air in your lungs.

your pussy felt like heaven to him.

the sex was brutal, your sweaty back got stuck to the leather as he held your hips and battered your sweet cunt. he liked the idea that he ruined you for other men, that no one else could make you feel the way he did.

"do you see now." he said, "we're meant to be."

you looked away, "john, please." you felt the warmth pool in your gut. he took you by the jaw and pulled you into a kiss as he continued to move against you.

"you're my heart and soul, baby girl." his voice was low and erotic, "made just for me." he wanted to get it through to you that you were meant to be with him. arousal shot through him at the idea, the best way he could make sure that the two of you would be tied together.

it fueled him to push his cock as deep as it could go. his heavy balls hit against your ass as he fucked you without abandon. your sweet moans filled his head and he could feel his grey t-shirt grow hot with sweat.

he didn't worry, next round he'd get undressed fully. for now your sweet slick would ruin the denim of his jeans. he gazed at the expressions on your face as you closed your eyes.

"that's it."

"please, john. fuck, pull out." you whined.

"can't do that, love. you're keeping me in ya. you want this too. keep a little reminder on me in ya when you call that fuckin' prick of yours to break up."

"i'm not breaking up with him." you trembled in an attempt to gain some kind of control

he grabbed you by the hair and made you look at him. his chuckled lowly, "cute, love. but no, you're going to sit there with my cum in your cunt as you call that fuckin' prick to tell him to leave you alone. or better yet, you keep my cock nice and cozy inside ya when you call."

you swallowed and whimpered, "please, john."

he gave you a rough kiss on the cheek, his facial hair was scratchy against your soft, sweaty skin, "it's either that, or he won't be walkin' ever again. i'd suggest you take the more merciful option." he let go of your hair and quickened his pace.

you squeezed your eyes shut once more and it wasn't long before orgasm pulled you under. your slick cunt gripped his cock as the euphoria rushed through you.

price was pleased with himself as a pathetic noise left your lips. he gave a few more hearty thrusts before he finished. his noises were lower, darker and deeper than yours.

"good girl." he said, "lettin' your man do what needs to do to keep this together." he pushed strands of hair out of your face, his cock still hard in you, "see, you can listen. you can behave."

"john." you whined.

he patted your cheek lovingly, "shh, not now. let it happen." his voice was so calm and cool. the tonal whiplash made your head feel murky.

why did you leave him anyway?

he then grabbed you by the hair and brought you down onto the expensive carpet. he took off he shirt while you were on your shaky hands and knees. he knew your pulse was racing.

"don't worry baby girl." he said as he kissed your sweaty back, "just gotta go a few more times... until it takes."

-

while re-marriage wasn't common, being mrs. price was your rightful title. especially now that your little girl was born. price got you a nice house on a piece of land out in the country. you could raise your little family in peace.

"c'mon honey." you cooed at your toddler as she tried to stand on shaky legs, "go see daddy." there was such tenderness in your voice.

who would've thought a nice house and a cute little babe would've fixed ya right up!

price watched you try to teach your little girl how to walk on the grass. your hands held her smaller ones. price smiled at the rim of his teacup. for a moment he thought he lost you, but there's no worries now. you were his and next time he wouldn't let you leave. <3

[sweet-as-an-angel]

how about yan!dilf finding out that his darling has an onlyfans account?

Yandere DILF! Reaction to You Having an OnlyFans

Warnings: 18+, Smut, Manipulation, Blackmail, Infidelity, Pet Names, No Pronouns Used For Reader Except You.

Wordcount: 4364 words

♡ Good Lord, WHO gave this man internet access.

♡ Going to keep it real with you, babe, you’re finished if he finds your OnlyFans account. And so is he (in more ways than one) – but more on that later.

♡ Let’s say Domninic’s many, many hours of internet sleuthing (stalking) have led him to the pearly gates of your Only Fans account, the only thing separating him from whatever lies on the other side being a pay wall. One of the only kinds of walls that can’t stop Dominic.

♡ Of course, he buys a subscription. Of course, he does it under an alias, through an unlisted online banking app, on a burner laptop.

♡ And, upon seeing what you’re offering, he’s glad he took so many precautions.

♡ At first, the two emotions Dominic has felt most commonly throughout his lifetime flash in his ribcage, dance along the edge of his eyelids – make his eyes grow heavy.

♡ Lust and rage.

♡ Lust for the obvious. Rage for that which shouldn’t have angered Dominic.

♡ In a lot of ways, Dominic is a traditionalist; one’s significant other is for their partner and nobody else (even if Dominic doesn’t abide by this logic himself). Thus, to see you, the person he wishes he’d married, the person he knows is fated to be his, spreading their legs for any guy with enough money to buy a coffee, mortifies him.

♡ One, because you’re his. Two, because you sell yourself for such a low price.

♡ Dominic’s too wrapped up in his wrath to see to the vague throbbing between his legs. He’ll just make it Marilyn’s problem later when she returns from book club or whatever it is she does these days – and continue to make it her problem well into the morning when she struggles to emerge from bed, her legs buckling beneath the weight of his anger.

♡ For now, he paces around his office, checks the camera inside the bear he’d given to you months before.

♡ How had he not noticed sooner? He watched the footage from that bear enough times that he can recite everything you’ve ever said, can predict everything you’re going to do, has memorised all the unconscious quirks you adopt when you think no one’s watching.

♡ Dominic comes to the conclusion that you must be conducting your business in another location. One where you won’t be so easily found.

♡ Sure, he could go out, follow you to this location when you think you’re alone. He could even pay someone else to do it. But, amidst his rage, an idea sparks.

♡ No, he has a much better, much more cunning trick up his sleeve.

♡ The next day, Dominic comes to you with an offer he knows you can’t refuse.

♡ “Marilyn and I are going out tomorrow night and we’d like for you to babysit the boys for us.”

♡ You tried to refuse. You tried to make up a reason less nefarious than the one you held in your mind as to why you couldn’t do it. And Dominic only smiled, his eyes never crinkling, the sentiment never reaching them. He looked through you.

♡ He offered to raise your pay to an amount you both couldn’t accept and couldn’t pass up.

♡ This newfound amount was, considering how few subscribers you had on OnlyFans, irresistible. A godsend, in some respects. Especially when Dominic began taking his wife out more and more frequently, needing you to care for his children more often than not.

♡ To Marilyn, Dominic was finally, finally, trying to fix their marriage. To make good on the world he’d promised her those twenty-or-so years ago when he’d imprisoned her in a loveless marriage.

♡ To you, Dominic was being an understanding neighbour who was offering you a chance at a normal living wage out of the kindness of his heart.

♡ To Dominic, it was all a ploy to get you right where he wants you.

♡ The weeks passed. Dominic kept a close eye on your OnlyFans page.

♡ It would soon be time for you to upload your newest batch of material. If you ever found the time to do so, of course. What, with all the extra work Dominic had given you, he wouldn’t be surprised if you’d forgotten. Or simply hadn’t the time.

♡ It mattered little to Dominic now. He knew he had you on the ropes.

♡ The shift from one foot to the other as he offered you yet another night to babysit his boys, only for your eyes to lower. Uneasy.

♡ You’d tried the old “I’m sorry, Mr. Laurier–”

♡ “Please, (Y/N), we’ve been over this.” He smiles down at you. “Call me Dominic.”

♡ You try again.

♡ “Dominic – I’m sorry, but I just don’t think I’ll be able to tonight–”

♡ And Dominic used the tried and tested: “Oh…is it the pay? I can pay you more, if that’s the issue–”

♡ Issue. You’re making a problem out of this, not him.

♡ You backpedal. You sigh. You try to stand your ground.

♡ Unfortunately for you, the ground you’re standing on is merely a sheet Dominic is going to pull out from under you at any moment.

♡ You tried. Really, you did. Tried to reject Dominic’s kindness.

♡ And he looks down at you. He’s too beautiful for a grimace, he knows this. He puts on a mask he’s sculpted just for this moment – the false front.

♡ “I see,” he says, his voice low. His gaze shifts off to the side. He pretends to look for the right words to say. He already has them in his back pocket.

♡ “I understand. It’s just that…well…” He sighs. Places a hand on his hip. A change in posture. Something’s shifted about him. You’re paying attention, the oncoming of regret starting to form in the pit of your stomach.

♡ Dominic looks you dead in the eyes.

♡ “Don’t…tell anyone I told you this,” he looks behind him. Turns back to you. “But, Marilyn and I don’t really trust anyone else with our babies – we only keep asking you because…well, you’re brilliant with them.”

♡ He says it like it’s common sense. Flattery is every manipulator’s best friend.

♡ He senses reservation in you. He keeps going.

♡ “And…no, forget it, it’s fine. We’ll just cancel,” he smiles down at you. This time, the smile does reach his eyes. Makes it look like he’s hiding something else. Sorrow.

♡ You gasp inwardly, you take a step towards him.

♡ “Oh, I’m sorry! No, no, I can watch them tonight. I’ll just…do my work tomorrow,”

vYou try to smile. Dominic’s becomes genuine.

♡ “You sure? We–” Marilyn and I, halve the blame– “wouldn’t want to be keeping you from anything important.”

♡ You assure him they aren’t. That he isn’t. He’s won this round.

♡ He puts his hand on your shoulder. You’ve known each other long enough now that this is no longer a gesture that would inflict upon Dominic a problem he’d be lumbered with until he can, quite literally, take it into his own hands, and that you don’t flinch beneath his touch.

♡ There will be time enough for that. He knows this.

♡ And so, Dominic leaves you with an estimation of the time of his outing and his arrival. 

♡ “We’ll be back before you know it,” he says. He smiles at you from the front door, the handle in his grip. He leaves, his victory ringing in his head, making his heart thrum.

♡ And he didn’t even need to bust out the old ‘My marriage is failing’ shtick.

♡ True to his word, Dominic and his wife leave early into the evening, a rehash of their sons’ bedtimes and snack preferences no longer necessary. Second nature to you now.

-

♡ Your work – your OnlyFans content – played on your mind for the whole evening. Time seemed to slip away and stand still – paradoxy – as you pleaded inwardly for Dominic and Marilyn to return.

♡ The hours bled into one another, tearing away from what you could have been doing instead of guarding the house while Marilyn’s children slept upstairs, for truly they were more Marilyn’s offspring than they were Dominic’s.

♡ A half hour passed. Forty-five minutes. An hour.

♡ You came to face the possibility – the likely reality – that you would simply have to announce to the few followers you had that there would be no new content this month; that you would supply them with what they paid for twice over in a few weeks’ time. And pray that you actually had an audience patient enough to outlast your absence before that.

♡ Amidst your planning of damage control, an idea poked its head from the shadows. A failsafe. A sequel to your desperation.

♡ You could always just…take a few pictures here.

♡ The idea flashed in your mind like a life alternate to your own; past, with the certainty of already having been lived. All consequences already tangible. Foreseen.

♡ Perhaps that was why the anxiety associated with such expeditions into unfamiliarity had failed to catch up with you.

♡ Or, perhaps something masked it. Desperation, or one of its subsidiaries.

♡ Of course, you tried to stifle the idea. Tried to suffocate it with the smoke through which it walked. Though, its fiery grasp had mastered the art of survival.

♡ It wouldn’t go away. Much like Dominic’s lingering gaze whenever his wife was out of eye-shot and only you remained.

♡ Ten minutes crawled by and you almost wished for the rapidity with which the last hours had passed to find you, seek you out amidst this frozen landscape Time had entombed you in.

♡ And, as is the folly of man, you entertained that which should not be. You considered the likelihood – the schematics – of indulging such a proposition.

♡ Nobody was home and the boys were asleep, out of the way. Most rooms were large enough and devoid of personality so to mask your location – especially if the Lauriers had more of the sterile white sheets they laid their bed with.

♡ Then, a memory.

♡ A basement, tucked away between the folds of your psyche as its location within the house. You recalled the couple having one – a sizable one at that – when Dominic had invited you down there with him to retrieve more seating for his lawn party.

♡ You knew where it was. Knew where the keys were kept.

♡ And so, with a hammering heart and a withering step, you sought your fortune.

♡ The keys were easily enough discovered. As was the creaking door of the basement. And, upon your descension – biblical in your visage as the light from the hallway, dim as it were, cast a glow about your silhouette amidst the depths of the basement – you found precisely what you needed.

♡ A space – clean, untouched – equipped with white sheets covering a mass of boxes. Sure, they were creased; stained with Age’s attempts at youth, gripping onto the sheets and leaving his spectral marks – wrinkles – in their cotton-thin sheets, but they were there.

♡ You cast a keen ear to the ceiling, the living room floor, every few minutes as you looked for a place to start filming, a place to lay the sheets down, something to cover your face.

♡ You find a place, retrieve a Halloween mask from one of the boxes, and, without much deliberation, begin filming.

♡ What you do is nobody’s business but your own. Well, yours and the hungry men who survey your account for any crumbs you deign to feed them.

♡ What you don’t hear through the conduct of your business is the return of the home’s owner.

♡ Dominic hung up his coat, made little show of announcing his presence, and went straight for the basement.

♡ Don’t ask how he knew you’d be there.

♡ His steps grew more deliberate, louder, the closer he grew.

♡ You didn’t even know he was home until it was too late.

♡ At the height of your percussion, just when you were about to reach the moment of your video that would make the lead up worth it, something hit the floor behind you.

♡ You jumped. Whipped round to see what had happened.

♡ And there was Dominic. Hair black as the corners of the room, eyes void of any discernible emotion as he looked down at you, arms crossed over his chest, the top of his shirt undone by two buttons, not even out of his work clothes.

♡ You fumbled, the apologies, explanations and defences lodged in your throat as you choked to get them out, slamming your thighs together and reaching for the camera in your bid to shut it down. You tore the mask from your head, revealing blushed cheeks and a light sheen of sweat forming from the neck up.

♡ Dominic made sure to stay out of the camera’s line of sight, to remain only an anonymous spectator as he circled the room. He said nothing. Did nothing. Just watched and waited, walking.

♡ It was only after he knew the camera was off, your confidence in tatters around you, that he approached.

♡ You tried explaining, but he just shushed you.

♡ “No need to explain, my Dear,” he told you. He sighed, deeply, brought the corner of his lip between his teeth. He donned the veneer of disappointment.

♡ “I suppose I’m just…shocked,” he said. He leaned against a stack of boxes, solid against his back. He ran a hand through his hair and looked off somewhere. “I never knew you were…that kind of person,”

♡ The way he said that, like it had bleached his tongue just to speak it, made your heart sink lower.

♡ “I mean, what do we do now?” He made sure he gave you an incredulous glance, feigned disappointed abashment. “I pay you to look after my sons and I find you here, doing…” He looked to the camera, briefly, then away. As if he could still see what you had done on the tiny screen attached to it.

♡ You apologised profusely, tried to defend yourself: “Mr. Laurier, please – I didn’t– I never–”

♡ He didn’t interrupt you. He let you tie yourself in knots. Like a pretty present, all for him.

♡ Once you had exhausted your ability to explain yourself, Dominic let your fear hang for a moment, let it sink before you like a darkness bowing the ceiling above you. The singular lightbulb flickered.

♡ Dominic sighed. Pushed off the boxes. Came to you.

♡ “Honestly, (Y/N), if you were that desperate for money, you could’ve just asked.”

♡ He knew that wasn’t why you were doing this. But he also knew you’d accept whatever out he gave you. You listened.

♡ “Have I not been paying you enough? Have I misvalued your capabilities for this position?”

♡ The way his eyes flickered to your locked-together legs as he said position made your skin shiver.

♡ “Or…” he looked down on you. Relaxed his posture.

♡ “Is there perhaps some other reason you chose to…conduct yourself here?”

♡ When you didn’t answer, trying to decode his crypticism, he cocked his head ever so slightly to the side.

♡ “Could it be that you…wanted me to find you like this?”

♡ You tried to deny it, tried your utmost to say you’d never do such a thing to anyone, least of all your married neighbour and employer, but Dominic would hear none of it.

♡ “I’m flattered, really.” He says. He cast his eyes down, as if mulling over a secret. “My wife and I’s deteriorating marriage must be worse than I thought if it was so apparent to you of all people.”

♡ You knew such a comment, especially under these circumstances, shouldn’t have stung the way it did. Dominic only let you ruminate on it for a moment.

♡ “Maybe you wanted to show me something you knew Marilyn couldn’t.”

♡ Your jaw dropped. Dominic came to stand behind the camera. He toyed with it, general, not looking at anything in particular. You begged that he wouldn’t find a way to review the footage.

♡ Domonic stood back, looked down at you.

♡ “How about a compromise,” he offered. You watched him, eyes wide, heart pounding, stomach churning, breath short. He gave a pale smile.

♡ “You help me burn off some of the tension I’ve had building up over the last few weeks,” his eyes darkened. “And we’ll never speak a word of what happened here tonight.”

♡ Your words caught in your throat again.

♡ You knew Dominic was attractive, sure, but to help him cheat on his wife? And one so kind and loving as Marilyn–

♡ Your head span. Dominic had thrown you a lifeline.

♡ With a sigh, you evaluated your options.

♡ Your OnlyFans rarely made enough money to keep you financially independent, even for a short while; you had more to lose if you couldn’t keep your babysitting job. And you knew there was no chance Dominic would let you babysit again if he thought this was what you’d be doing during the dark hours of the evening.

♡ And what if he told Marilyn? What if she told their neighbours, your parents–

♡ In your vulnerability, your worry for your own preservation, you quietly agreed.

♡ And besides, you rationalised with yourself as the weight of the situation, of Dominic settling behind you, sank in. Better for Marilyn that he’s doing this with me rather than someone she doesn’t know, right?

♡ Given your bottom half was already bare, Dominic didn’t have to waste time undressing you himself. Though, under any other circumstances, he’d have jumped at the privilege.

♡ He’d often dreamed of this entire process being slower, gentler, and in the comfort of a bed in some lush space – usually a hotel. Not the sheet-covered ground of his cold basement.

♡ That evening, the mask Dominic wore was that of the common thief, for from you he stole your dignity. Your future.

♡ What you hadn’t realised was, as Dominic had been stood by the camera, he’d set it to record. Premeditated.

♡ You didn’t question why he pulled the mask from beside you onto his head. You just assumed, in your post-panic haze, that this was something he was into. Something he hid from Marilyn.

♡ Dominic still wore his work pants and had them pulled down to the bottom of his thighs. He’d also done away with his shirt from what you could feel of his skin; he radiated heat like you’d never felt before, even when you’d been in close proximity to him prior to this.

♡ You didn’t even have chance to think of much, to let the guilt and abashment of this whole situation weigh in on you as, with Dominic’s hands about your waist as if to steady you, he pushed in, filling you by an inch or two. 

♡ You were easy to penetrate given your recent activity, but that only served to quell the stretch by a slight margin. You gasped, jolted, and Dominic’s grip about your middle tightened. He pulled you back, inadvertently pushing more of himself into you. You bit your lip, trying not to enjoy the mortifying implications of this entire affair, the feeling of being filled by the man who held your future in his hands.

♡ He was, regardless of whether you’d done this before, nothing like you’d ever experienced. He alternated between being gentle and rough, eventually lodging himself inside you entirely and guiding you up and down his shaft at a rate that suggested patience. Just a minute later, he’d pick up the pace, pulling out and slamming back in, pushing you down so he could reach the deeper parts of you.

♡ And all the while, you could feel a tightness below your stomach. One which, to your panic, strengthened whenever you considered that you were helping a married man cheat on his wife, that your situation was buried beneath so many layers of complexity you feared you’d never see the light of clarity again.

♡ A married man. One who, if his soft touches and stifled moans were anything to go by, held rather a fondness for you in this moment.

♡ Dominic didn’t talk at all throughout the entire encounter, opting only to communicate with an occasional squeeze to your thighs, reaching around to your front to touch you in ways that had you whining and crying, and tugs to your hair whenever you tried to hide your face in your hands.

♡ The whole sordid affair hadn’t unfolded exactly how Dominic had wished – dreamed – it would.

♡ In his dreams, it had been gentler – consistently so. More private. Though, no less taboo.

♡ Now, he was harsher. Rough, though not enough to hurt you. Just enough to make sure you felt every inch of him; just what these subscribers of yours would pay to see.

♡ Dominic pressed close to you as the camera recorded, your face exposed for whoever came into possession of the video to see.

♡ Of course, so long as you remained an obedient little pet, Dominic would never have to release it to anyone.

♡ The transaction, one which left you breathless and sweltering, finished only when Dominic did. He made sure you were satiated, too, something to think about over the coming weeks as you curated more content for your subscribers, every moment no doubt a reminder of your encounter with him.

♡ Afterwards, he removed himself, though with much hesitance. He’d finally, finally attained that which he wanted most – you – and yet it hadn’t been under the circumstances he’d romanticised for so long.

♡ He tried not to think about it, storing it with the rest of the undesirable humanisms he had locked away elsewhere in his psyche. He focussed only on how explosive it had felt, how…alive he was in comparison to all the other times he’d been with someone, using them as nothing more than a mannequin to pump himself with rather than someone to give himself to.

♡ He let you lie on the floor, a blanket draped over you as he sorted himself out. He clicked the camera off, took out the memory card and kept it firmly attached to his palm – all while you weren’t looking, weren’t listening, senses still dazed with all Dominic had given you, done to you.

♡ As he removed the mask, there was a sheen to his skin and a passive glint in his smile that suggested something inhuman and false about him. Something you discovered too late, it would seem.

-

♡ After that evening, you had no choice but to continue on as if nothing had happened. For so long as Dominic was in possession of that night – that memory card – nothing had. You, of course, knew nothing of the card at first. Not until Dominic had let it slip that the camera had been rolling the entire time.

♡ And still, you didn’t question his use of the mask. The serendipitous timing of it all. You could hardly breathe for the ocean boiling in your stomach, your heart bleaching white and your brain paling as you realised you’d just filmed a sex tape that could ruin not just your life, but Dominic’s too.

♡ Oh, if only you knew just how little Dominic cared.

♡ Dominic told you not to worry, that he’d salvaged the memory card and put it somewhere safe only to now return it to you.

♡ He’d duplicated the video, of course. That, he kept somewhere even safer.

♡ Sure, he’d allowed you to upload it to your account when you asked him with wide eyes, your face blurred and his figure already unrecognisable to any of your simps. You still needed content, after all, so why not profit off your late-night tryst with your neighbour?

♡ Which was what led you to come to him now, eyes downcast as he stood before you, arms crossed, smile ready to split his face in half and reveal the parasites that made up his interior.

♡ The truth you gave him? Your account had garnered a great deal of traction since your…uploaded encounter. About three thousand new subscribers, to be exact.

♡ “Oh?” Dominic offered. “And why are you telling me this, mon Chèr? Do you plan on splitting your earnings with me?”

♡ He graced you with his charm, his humour. Tried keeping the situation light.

♡ A redness rolled across your face. Dominic smiled, slim and sly, and allowed you to foster his silence, his attention.

♡ You suggested filming something else. Something that could make the guilt you felt for your last encounter with him feel half worth it.

♡ Nothing ever would, of course. But you could at least try.

♡ And so began a lustrous alliance between yourself and Dominic, the man who had once been your neighbour, then your employer, now your owner.

♡ He used you as he pleased, donned the mask and bent you over under the guise of being the conduit for your growing fanbase. In reality, the scorching, pulsating, blistering reality you inhabited with him, you were his. His star who he made and will break when he sees fit.

♡ So long as he had that memory card, and the growing catalogue of blackmail you keep adding to in your bid to chase what you thought was the weight of your self-worth in cash, you were his.

♡ Infidelitous, yes. But that mattered little to Dominic. Nothing mattered more now that he had you in his hands, whimpering for him, coming undone for him, all while he maintained the safe anonymity of both his mask and the façade of a loving, caring family man.

Reblog for more content like this! It helps creators like myself tremendously and it is greatly appreciated :-)

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[interstellarrisa]

Giving up is never an option˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆｡☆

˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆｡☆˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆｡☆˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆｡☆˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆｡☆˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆｡☆˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆｡☆˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆｡☆˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆｡☆

Actually, go ahead and give up but remember this: if you do you'll have to continue living in this shitty reality when you could instead be enjoying life with your dream manifestations or in your dream reality but instead you chose to stay, you chose to give up, you chose to not continue persisting.

You didn't find out about all this just for you to give up. Right now you could be dancing amongst the stars or performing on a stage in front of thousands of fans. Anything you can dream about is real and you can experience it right now.

If this is all fake and we're just being delusional because the law didn't work out for you then are those success stories all just lies and if so what would they gain by spreading lies? Nobody's paying them? There's even posts where shifting anti's themselves shifted. I myself have manifested time stopping, getting full marks on a test and even have a success story posted on my page.

Maybe the fact that the law isn't working for you proof that the law works. If you assume that you don't have your desires time and time again then that assumption might spiral into the belief that the law is fake and doesn't work. Isn't that the law working then because you assume that it's not working? Just flip those negative thoughts around.

From "Why can't I see xyz?" to "It doesn't matter if I can't see it, I still know that I have it and nothing can change it."

Remember: This is your reality, it exists solely because of you not the other way around. If you want something just be the one who has it. Just have it. The same way you are being the one who lacks it be the one who has it by fulfilling yourself in any way possible. If you are manifesting money don't think the way a poor person would but instead think the way a rich person would. This does not mean that you should spend your money irresponsibly and buy anything you want just because it's cute. Don't try to fulfill the outer world but instead the inner world.

"If you want to be happy, be." - Leo Tolstoy.

Be, embody the version of yourself who has it whether it be having straight a's or being a master at entering the void state. If you give up it's truly over. All your dreams, all the magical things you wanted to experience gone in an instant. The childhood dreams that you once had, are you really going to give up on them? You were given a chance to change it all and now you're just giving up, how disappointing.

˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆｡☆˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆｡☆˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆｡☆˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆｡☆˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆｡☆˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆｡☆˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆｡☆˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆｡☆

[candylix]

one little lie | hyung line (part 2)

Pairing • FWB!Minho x Fem!Reader x Hyung Line

A/N • This is part 2! You can see the series masterlist here.

Summary • The boys have one rule in their shared apartment. Don't bring girls over for sex. So when Chan, Hyunjin, and Changbin walk in on Minho fucking the living daylights out of you in the living room, he has to lie to save his own skin. His excuse? That's not a girl under him... you're a sex robot. And now they all want to try you out.

Genre • smut, sci-fi ish? (sex robots are a thing in this world that people know about and use)

WC • 3.1k

Content • reader pretends to be a sex robot, free use, dubcon, groping, nipple play, boob sex, orgasm denial, edging, riding, daddy kink, threesome, tiny bit of overstim, Minho discovers he's really into watching you get fucked by other people.

Minho walks you out of the bathroom, and you head to Hyunjin's room. You're walking through his apartment naked, about to be handed off to his roommate for sex, and somehow you're more okay with it than you were earlier. Minho knocks on Hyunjin's bedroom door, and when it swings open to reveal a gorgeous man wearing only his boxers, you can feel you core start to throb in anticipation.

"Thank you for the delivery," Hyunjin says. He grabs your shoulders to pull you towards him, but Minho doesn't let go.

"Be careful with her, she's still sensitive after Changbin."

Hyunjin pauses at that statement.

"How can she be sensitive, she's a robot," he asks, and Minho tuts at him.

"I told you, she's very realistic. I couldn't even clean her up without her twitching every time I touched her."

Literally not true, but you couldn't complain out loud.

"I promise I'll be gentle. Happy?" he says, and Minho rolls his eyes.

He pulls your body towards him, and Minho reluctantly gives you away to him. He buries your face in his chest, wrapping his arms around your torso, and drags you away to his bed. Hyunjin looks back to his door, where Minho is still waiting.

"Are you planning on standing there? Close the door."

"Oh, right," he says, and hits his hand on the door frame before grabbing the handle to close the door.

His bed is in the corner of the room, and he props you up against a wall. You sit on his bed in front of him, and he admires your body.

"This is so fucking realistic, holy shit."

He spreads your legs, and takes a seat between them. His eyes are glued to your chest. He takes your boobs in his hands, weighing them, and then bouncing them. He plays with your tits, squeezing, pulling, pushing them together, pinching your nipples, exploring everything he can do with them. He's like a kid in a candy shop, if the kid was a grown man and the candy was your boobs.

Finally, he brings his mouth to one of your nipples, and you feel his tongue lick circles around it and over it until it's erect. He lightly bites it, and you yelp.

"Oh, that gets you vocal, huh? Interesting."

He goes back to teasing your nipple, licking and nipping, experimenting with what else causes you to make noise. He fondles one of your boobs with his hand while sucking on the opposite nipple, and he finally gets you to let out a quiet moan. Satisfied with himself, he turns to move.

He hops off the bed, and as he pulls down his boxers, you get a full view of his dick. It's not as thick as Changbin's, but it's long. You can feel yourself leaking from the sight of it.

He steps back to the bed, and lays you flat on your back. He climbs on top of you, straddling your waist, and lies down on top of you, burying his face into your chest. His long dick presses against your core, throbbing against you as he gropes your breasts. You whimper at the contact. You want nothing more than for him to start already. You can feel him stiffen up as he fondles you, and his body starts mindlessly rocking. His dick drag itself over your pussy as he rocks, and he pinches your nipples, earning another yelp from you.

He suddenly stops, and grabs your wrists. He lifts your arms up to your chest, and places your hands on your boobs to push them together. He lets go of you, and when your hands stay where they are, he smiles.

"Whoa, that worked."

He snuggles into your tits for a while, feeling how soft you were under him. When he's done, he moves his body, and you feel his dick slide away from your pussy. He straddles your stomach, and positions his cock between your tits. He slides it in, and you feel how hard he is already. Your boobs wrap around his dick, and it throbs inside your soft mounds. He hovers over you, with his arms on either side of your head as he holds himself up.

With a steady roll of his hips, he moans softly as he thrusts his long cock into you, the tip poking out the other side before getting sucked back in. He slowly rocks into you, feeling the way his stiff cock drags against your plush flesh. He wants to feel every inch of himself between your boobs, and he watches as they jiggle with every thrust.

His arousal grows at the sight, and he groans as he rocks into you faster. You press your boobs together harder, fully enveloping his dick and overwhelming his senses with the increased pressure.

"Fuck," he moans, and bucks into you desperately.

Your entire body rocks under him as he fucks your tits faster, humping your chest with all his energy. The movement of your body under him and his loud moans has your core pulsing intensely, and you want nothing more than to have him thrusting inside your pussy. You can't even touch yourself with him on top of you like this, with your hands busy holding together your boobs while he fucks them. The entire bed rocks with him, creaking louder with every thrust.

A string of 'fuck, fuck, fuck' escapes his lips each time his dick buries itself into your tits, getting louder as the feeling builds.

Your boobs push and pull against you, bouncing in rhythm with his hard cock as it grinds against your chest. He moans louder as he feels his orgasm coming, and he increases the speed of his humping, which only shakes your boobs harder. A groan slips out of you at the sensation, and the sound takes him over the edge.

With a loud moan, his cum splatters across your chest and onto your neck as he reaches his climax. The creaks of the bed get quieter as he slows down, and his rocking gets softer and softer as he rides out his high. He finally finishes, and he pulls out his dick from between your breasts.

He doesn't pull your hands away, though, and lays down on top of you, his face buried in your chest. His thigh sits in between your legs, pressing against your bare cunt. You want to hump into him, feel anything to relieve yourself. You're wet, pulsing, and can't do anything about it.

Finally, he rolls off of you, panting in exhaustion.

"Shit, I forgot to set my name," he says, and you desperately wish he remembered so he could stuff his long cock into you. "Next time."

You don't want him to do it next time, you want him to do it now.

But you can't tell him that, and can't touch yourself, so you're left entirely at the whims of the man breathing heavily beside you.

"God," he says, in between breaths, "that was fun." His hand is back on your boob, kneading it softly. "I can't give you back to Jisung."

He fondles you, rubbing your nipple with his index finger. You're so sensitive that the slightest touch makes you whimper, which only makes him want to touch it more. After a few excruciating minutes of Hyunjin unknowingly edging you, you hear hard knocking at his door.

"Hyunjin, give her back!" Minho yells.

"No!" Hyunjin yells back, and Minho barges into the room. He sees Hyunjin, naked and playing with your boob, and he feels the same way as when he saw you leaking on Changbin's bed— arousal. And he has no idea why. Hyunjin quickly sits up to cover himself with a pillow, and you're finally released from his grasp.

"You can't just come in here!" Hyunjin says, but Minho ignores him, and walks over to the bed. He looks to the cum stain on your chest, and it's hard not to notice his bulge growing.

"Yes I can. You didn't even lock the door," he says, ignoring the throbbing in his pants.

He pulls you up off the bed, and Hyunjin just huffs in disappointment, but doesn't stop Minho from taking you away. You walk back to the bathroom, which has now become your refuge, and the only place you can actually talk. Minho is already wiping your neck before you can even sit down.

"Two down, one to go. How're you feeling? Was he gentle?"

Hyunjin didn't touch your aching core, so you were feeling extremely needy and not entirely of sound mind.

"Worse than gentle. If I don't get something in me right now, I might explode," you say. You don't even care how insane you sound at this point.

You reach for the zipper of Minho's pants and pull it down, but he grabs your wrists before you can go any further.

"Whoa, slow down. Save that for Chan."

"Minho, please," you whine. He's still holding you, so you can't even touch yourself to relieve the ache.

"Wait just a little bit longer."

You pout at his command, but comply. You resist the growing urge to hump his leg. He holds both your wrists in one hand, while the other wipes the rest of the cum off your collarbone and chest. He takes his time with it, and you think he's going intentionally slow just to mess with you.

"See, that wasn't so bad, right?" he says, finally finished cleaning you up. "Now we can go see Chan."

He opens the door, and walks you back to the living room where Chan is waiting. Neither Changbin nor Hyunjin are there, so you assume they're still recovering in their rooms.

Chan stands up when he sees you walk in.

"I'll help you bring her to my room," he says, and he and Minho take you to your last destination.

"Where are we putting her?" Minho asks, and Chan hesitates.

"Actually... do you know if she can... ride people?" he says bashfully.

Minho looks at you, but you give no visible response. Not that you'd be able to.

"I don't know... probably not. She'd need help moving on you."

"Oh..." Chan says, looking defeated. "I guess we can just put her on my bed."

"Wait-" Minho interjects. His mouth is faster than his brain. "I could help you."

"What?"

"Like... with having her ride you. I can help."

Chan's face goes red.

"But that would mean having you watch me."

"That's not a big deal, right? Just bros helping bros. You want her to ride you, and I'll get her to do it."

Chan stares at him for a moment, debating in his mind if he wants this or not.

"Ok," he finally responds, "just bros helping bros."

Chan sits down on his office chair, and slides off his sweatpants and briefs. Minho moves you in front of him while Chan jerks himself off, just enough to get hard. His dick is big and leaking precum, and you're excited to have it inside you. You'd be excited to have anything inside you at this moment, but Chan looks tantalizing, sitting there with his hard cock out, just for you. He holds up his dick, waiting for you to sit on him.

"Remember to set your name when you're inside her," Minho reminds him.

"Right."

He lowers you down onto Chan, and you're finally about to get some relief. You're still extremely wet from your last encounter, so you slide onto him easily. He groans at the overflowing juices surrounding his cock, and how easily he's able to get himself inside you. He quickly fills you up, and he hits a sensitive bundle of nerves. You want to bounce on him, feel him hit that spot again and again, but you know you aren't allowed to move until Minho moves you. It's agonizing.

"Daddy," Chan says, surprising you and Minho both.

"Daddy," you moan, and you feel his dick throb at the sound of your voice.

"Daddy?" Minho asks. "I didn't know you were into that."

"Are you here to assist or make commentary?" Chan says, annoyed at his interruption.

"Sorry," Minho says, and stops talking.

Chan lifts up your arms, placing your hands on his shoulders, and lays his own on the armrests of his chair. Minho grabs your ass, and lifts you slightly. You feel Chan's cock slipping out of you, and you clench at the slow loss of contact, making Chan groan. Then Minho drops you back on his lap, and his dick spears your sensitive spot, causing you to moan loudly. You're finally getting the relief you've been whining about. Minho picks you up again, lifting you up and down on Chan's cock, and Chan's knuckles turn white as he grips the armrests.

You have no control over the pace of your bouncing, relying on Minho to lift you up and lower you down. But he does a good job, and every time Chan fills you up, your impending orgasm comes closer.

"Faster," Chan moans, and Minho picks up speed. He slides you down faster on Chan's dick, and it hits the right spot particularly hard.

"Daddy," you moan, and Chan's head goes back. He rolls his hips into you, increasing the impact against your pussy. His dick forces his way into you, and he's thick enough to rub against all of your walls as he penetrates you harder and harder. You can't help but to buck your hips into him, lifting yourself up and into him.

Minho doesn't have to do much now, you're moving all on your own, and Chan is too fucked out to notice, but he keeps his hands on your ass to sell it anyway. He leans his hips closer to you, and you feel his dick press against your ass as you bounce on Chan. You rub into him, and Minho moans against the friction.

You're very close now. You yell out 'daddy' with every thrust he makes into you, and Chan is a moaning mess on the chair. He can barely keep his eyes open anymore. The pleasure takes over his mind, and he bucks into you faster, completely uncoordinated with the pace of your bouncing. His thrusts penetrate you at erratic intervals, causing you to moan louder every time his cock buries itself fully in you. You can't think straight anymore, all you can do is submit to the feeling and yell out 'daddy' over and over again.

The only one still functioning is Minho, who's extremely turned on watching you fuck yourself on Chan's massive cock. He wished he could see the expression on your face every time Chan's dick rams into you, but hearing you loudly moaning is enough to know you're loving it. He's still grinding himself against your ass, and he can feel his own orgasm coming. But he knows if he cums now, he wont be able to hold you up and watch you cum on Chan's lap, so he stands back away from you. His dick throbs in his pants, but he knows he'll relieve himself later.

Chan continues bucking into you at an erratic pace, and every time his dick bottoms you out, you moan louder. You can feel your orgasm coming, and with one last thrust into your g-spot, you reach your climax.

"Daddy," you moan, clenching your walls against him, and a wave of liquid flushes out of you, drenching his cock with your cum.

"Oh my god," he moans out, feeling your juices spurt out of your pussy and onto his body. He grabs your hips, and rams into you harder, not letting you have a moment of rest as you come down from your high. His pace is unrelenting, and you spasm on his body as he thrusts into you. You hold onto his shoulder, trying to keep yourself up. He doesn't stop, and Minho helps him bounce you faster on his throbbing cock. The feeling overwhelms you, and you can't control your moans as he slams his dick into your sensitive cunt.

His own climax finally comes, and white hot liquid fills your pussy as he finally slows down. Minho's gently lowers you down, holding your ass as he hovers you over Chan's lap. Chan keeps humping into you, thrusts getting weaker as he rides out his high. Finally, he stops, and Minho lowers you down completely on him. Chan bottoms you out, but you're both too tired to do anything more. Chan leans back on his chair, and you lean back onto Minho.

"Fuck," is all Chan manages to say.

Minho begins to lift you up, and the movement of Chan's dick slipping out of you causes you to twitch, while Chan groans. He lifts you up completely, and your legs feel like jelly. Luckily, Minho is there to keep you standing.

He helps you walk, using considerably more effort than before. Before you leave, Chan calls out to him.

"Thanks... that was amazing."

Minho gives him an awkward thumbs up, and you both leave the room.

You collapse onto the toilet seat when you arrive at the bathroom.

"I'm gonna go get your clothes. You... catch your breath."

You can only nod in response, too tired to speak, and he leaves you there.

You can feel your mind clear, and your pussy leak with Chan's cum.

It's done. Minho's roommates have all fucked you, used you the way they wanted. Jisung would be here soon, and you could finally leave this all behind. You no longer had to pretend to be a sex robot.

So why did you feel disappointed?

The door opens, and Minho has your clothes in hand, and a visible erection in his pants.

You snicker at him.

"I didn't know you were into cucking, Minho."

"What? No I'm not."

"You literally volunteered to help Chan fuck me."

His cheeks go red, and he can't look you in the eye.

"W-well, you seemed to like having them fuck you like a sex doll."

"I was just acting," you say, and this time it's your turn to blush at his accusation.

"Was it acting when you were screaming Changbin's name? Or when you were moaning daddy, daddy-"

"Ok! Stop!" you say, waving your arms to get him to stop talking. "We both discovered something about ourselves today."

"I guess we did," he responds, and places your clothes on the counter. He uses a fresh towel to wipe you down, and you get dressed.

"Jisung should be here any second," Minho says.

One last time, he opens the bathroom door, and walks you out.

read part 3 here

taglist:

@loeyscock @0325tiny @5starlee @miupow @mapofthemazeinthemirror @sadrosessing @luminouskalopsia @minghaosimp @curiousgworge @azuna-sz @piscesrising01 @g-bbzz @extrhotjne @nabi-tokoshi @weareapackofstrays

[marysfics]

Beautiful, Always

You've been struggling with an acne outbreak, and it's left you feeling insecure. You can't help but worry that it might change the way your girlfriend sees you.

Insecurities, Fluff

The soft glow of the afternoon sun seeped through the curtains, casting warm golden hues across the living room. You sat on the couch, staring blankly at the TV, though the show playing had long since lost your attention. Instead, your mind swirled with a familiar, unwelcome thought.

It started small, just a few bumps on your cheek. At first, you convinced yourself it was nothing—a bad night’s sleep, maybe stress—but soon, it spread. Red, inflamed patches across your skin, reminiscent of the acne that had once plagued your teenage years. You’d thought you’d left this behind, that your skin had finally cleared. But here it was again, mocking you in the mirror each morning.

Today, it seemed worse. You had avoided Alexia all day, dodging her text messages with excuses about being busy or tired. When she returned home from training, you immediately retreated to the bedroom, doing everything you could to avoid facing her. It wasn't that she would judge you; Alexia had never made you feel anything less than loved. But the insecurity gnawed at you, and the thought of her seeing you like this—so vulnerable, so unlike the confident version of yourself you tried to be—was unbearable.

A soft knock on the door pulled you from your thoughts.

"Amor?" Alexia’s voice was gentle, full of concern. "Can I come in?"

You hesitated for a moment, then wiped the tears you hadn’t even realized had fallen from your cheeks. "Yeah," you mumbled, pulling the blanket tighter around yourself.

The door creaked open, and Alexia stepped inside. She was still in her training gear, hair slightly tousled, with that unmistakable air of calm that she always carried. Her eyes softened the moment she saw you.

"Hey," she whispered, walking over to the edge of the bed. "Why are you hiding from me?"

You forced a smile, trying to appear nonchalant, but it faltered as Alexia’s eyes scanned your face. The insecurity you’d been trying to suppress came rushing back, and you turned your face away, feeling a lump form in your throat.

"I’m not hiding," you lied, the crack in your voice betraying you. "I’m just tired."

Alexia tilted her head, her brows knitting together as she gently sat beside you. Her hand found yours, warm and comforting. "You don’t have to do that with me," she said softly, giving your hand a squeeze. "I can see something’s bothering you."

You stayed silent, unsure of how to voice the storm of thoughts in your mind. How could you tell her that you felt ugly? That the acne made you feel less than the person you wanted to be for her? You’d always admired how confident and composed Alexia was, both on and off the pitch. She deserved someone who could match that energy, not someone who hid away because of a few blemishes.

When you didn’t respond, Alexia reached up, gently turning your face towards her so you were forced to meet her gaze. Her thumb brushed across your cheek, tender and slow, as if she were trying to tell you something without words.

"Is this what’s been bothering you?" she asked quietly, her fingers barely grazing the inflamed skin.

You flinched involuntarily, tears welling up in your eyes. "It’s stupid," you muttered, trying to pull away, but Alexia didn’t let go.

"It’s not stupid," she said firmly, but her voice remained soft. "Not if it’s hurting you."

The dam broke, and the words you’d been holding in finally spilled out. "I thought it was gone," you confessed, your voice trembling. "I thought I was done with all of this, but now it’s back and… I hate how I look, Ale. I don’t want you to see me like this."

Alexia’s face softened even more, if that was possible. She shifted closer, her arm slipping around your waist as she pulled you into a gentle embrace. "Mi amor," she murmured into your hair. "You are beautiful. Always. I don’t care about this," she said, her hand brushing over your cheek again. "This doesn’t change anything."

You wanted to believe her, but the weight of your own insecurities still lingered. "I don’t feel beautiful," you whispered, the words raw and vulnerable.

Alexia pressed a kiss to your temple, her arms tightening around you. "I know it’s hard," she said softly. "But I wish you could see yourself the way I do. You're strong, kind, and so beautiful—inside and out. Acne or no acne, that doesn’t change."

Her words wrapped around you like a comforting blanket, easing some of the tension that had been coiled in your chest. You rested your head against her shoulder, letting yourself be held.

"Thank you," you murmured after a long moment, your voice barely above a whisper.

Alexia kissed the top of your head again, her fingers stroking through your hair. "You don’t ever have to hide from me, okay?" she whispered. "I’m here, always."

For the first time in what felt like days, you allowed yourself to breathe. The insecurities weren’t gone, but with Alexia by your side, they didn’t feel as overwhelming. You didn’t have to face them alone.

And in her arms, you felt loved—truly, deeply loved.

[nonbinarypirat]

education vs. fascism in iruma-kun

someone mentioned this in another post but iruma-kun does a wonderful job of showing that education is key to fighting fascist and harmful radical ideas. As soon as it became clear that things were going to change in the netherworld what was Sullivan's response? It wasn't "oh we need to send spies" or "we need to find the people" (though im sure people are working hard to find those answers) it was "we need to focus on educating our students." Because only knowledge and diversity in thoughts can combat fascist ideas. The issue only becomes worse with a lack of understanding and an echo chamber. And by doubling down with education, we can make sure our students are prepared for what lies ahead. Thats how we truly fight the power.

The teachers themselves can tell that things are changing. They stay informed and guess what? its obvious things are about to throw down soon. And so they work tirelessly not just because it's their jobs, but because they need to. this is their protest. this is how we can prevent the spread of gross rhetoric. And after Heartbreaker what they do? they double down on their education too. Because there is always something new to learn, always a way to grow/sharpen your strength. They too know that they can't stay stagnant, they must continue pushing to provide their students with the best chance of survival.

When you have villians that believe in these ideas in media, there's a big issue of them leaving out education as a weapon. But it's crucial if we want anything to truly change. Iruma himself wants to no longer be naive about the netherworld which was growing to be an issue the longer he stays. because yeah, you can't stay uninformed anymore iruma. its time to learn about the history of you new home and the leaders. taking being the king out of it, ignorance about these topics is a breeding ground for becoming complacent. iruma wants to be a hero? or at least, do the right thing when he can? that requires knowledge to make sure you aren't inadvertently hurting someone along the way.

Iruma loves the netherworld, the place he proudly calls home. but it's frought with danger and cruel people. And yet, Iruma is still proud of his new home and friends and wants to do anything he can to stay here. This reflects real life, where there is goodness and pride in the place you live and yet a faction of people who taint it with othering ideas. However, it's always worth fighting for the good overall and bettering yourself so you can see another tomorrow through. Iruma knows he can only protect himself and his loved ones is through learning. And I love Nishi for truly understanding this too. You can't fight fascism through pure will, it has to be beaten by education and the williness to better one's knowledge. That is how we will take back the Netherworld.

but yeah, this is just my little spiel as someone who loves educational activism and is going to school to become a teacher :). If i can find the original post I'll make sure to credit the op!

[david-talks-sw]

"The Acolyte" wasn't 'woke' propaganda.

I had my issues with the show (you can check out my other posts to see what they were) but there's this notion that The Acolyte was created to spread The Message™ of "woke propaganda"... and I think there's a bit of a mix-up going on, there.

Because that's simplifying things a lot.

When you're a minority, you're not "being woke" when you're just being yourself! Conversely, you're not "writing to be woke" when you're a minority drawing inspiration from your personal experiences to tell a story.

I talked before about how George Lucas implemented elements of his personal life in his own films. In his own words:

"There's no way to write without writing from yourself. Y'know, the stuff gets made out of things that you care about… whether you've actually lived them or not. There are emotional issues that you deal with, and I think that's always a major factor with any writer. I don’t think— it's hard to write without having some kind of emotional connection to the material. I've never seen any reason not to. It’s easy to write that way. It's hard to write in the abstract. So when I write a scene, I write a scene that moves me or I care about, or is something that is personal to me." - George Lucas, Q&A with Lynne Hale, 1994 (StarWars.com)

Any piece of writing worth some salt needs to come from a personal place to some degree because that's where the heart of the story, the truth, lies. That's what an audience will relate to.

Example: The six original Star Wars films are purely George Lucas. As in, everything in those films, from the characters, to the cinematography, to the editing style, etc are all a reflection of who George is as a person and what he stands for:

anti-Vietnam / "fight the corporate & imperial machine"

60s-70s white kid from Modesto, California

single father of three

who defines himself as Methodist-Buddhist,

has an anthropology major and

a passion for Kurosawa,

cinema vérité,

cinema history in general

art and visuals and

car racing.

You see all that in those films.

Same thing with The Acolyte.

Leslye Headland drew from her personal experiences.

Among other things, Leslye is gay. So that's what she uses as inspiration to, for instance, craft Qimir's character motivation.

"I was on the treadmill being like, “What is [Qimir] gonna say?!” And my wife, who is a huge part of my creative process, finally she said, “What do you wanna say? Stop thinking of it like you have to somehow tap into a different guy.” [...] I was like, “I wanna say that people don't want me to exist as a gay woman, as a woman in this particular space, working in this wild sandbox.” There was a whole crew of people who believed in me, but deep down, I felt like, “I am unaccepted for who I am because of what I believe in and wanting to wield my power the way I'd like without having to answer to the legion of people that just exist out there.”" - Leslye Headland, Collider, 2024

She took this specific life experience of hers, and then made it more universal, so that a bigger audience could relate to it.

"By the way, I think everybody feels this way. I think that's why it resonates when you're honest about yourself, and you get personal about it. When [Qimir] says, “I want freedom,” that's what I want. I just want freedom. I want to be able to just be out there and be myself and be the type of artist I want to be without having to answer to anybody." - Leslye Headland, Collider, 2024

Same goes with Osha and Sol's relationship, or how she defines the Jedi Order. It derives from her own relationship with her father and how she felt being raised straight, in a Christian household.

If you have the time, listen to this audio clip where she describes that.

In the context of the whole interview, her voice goes down a few octaves and starts to crack a bit. This is a vulnerable moment, when she's talking about it... and it's this experience that she turned into fuel for her writing of Sol and Osha's father/daughter bond.

"There's this thing that's called benign sexism, and part of it is this paternal protectionism — it seems like this good thing, but like you said, there's this, “I have to protect you from everything. I have to make sure you're okay. I have to tell you what track to get on, and then once you're on that track, I need to support you.” Ultimately, what happens is — again, this is a father-daughter relationship — as women evolve in their lives and develop their own personalities separate from their fathers, at some point, they have to reject that protectionism. [...] She cannot stay a little girl or an adolescent or young adult. She has to, at some point, say, “I reject what you have told me I need to do to make you proud, to follow in your footsteps.” She has to do that." - Leslye Headland, Collider, 2024

Now... if we're talking consistency with the themes in Lucas' Star Wars, then yeah, The Acolyte misses the mark.

The Jedi Order isn't the patriarchy or the Catholic Church. They're more like Buddhist monks, George has stated so multiple times.

The Jedi teachings aren't narratively meant to be the same traits found in toxic masculinity or benign sexism.

When a Jedi tells you to be mindful of your emotions, it's not meant in the "boys don't cry" sense.

When they talk about letting go of attachments, it's not meant in a stoic "don't get emotionally involved" sense.

Anakin too, the whole point is that he's wrong, the narrative frames his fall to the Dark Side as his own fault, it's not meant to be perceived as a failure in upbringing.

But she's not the only one who does it. Filoni does it too, a majority of fans have this take on the Jedi.

And because of her experiences, I can see why her takeaway would be that. Same goes for Filoni, they're products of their generation, upbringing and experiences.

My point is:

Leslye Headland is writing from a personal place, when she's writing The Acolyte. It's partially informed by her politics because - like she quotes, "personal is political" - but when it comes to the writing of the show, it's personal first and foremost.

What this was, was a Star Wars fan (arguably the nerdiest one we've had so far, in terms of creators) putting all of herself in the creation of a show that perfectly reflects who she is and what she stands for, resulting in:

a story about growing past your father's paternal control and accepting that our guides aren't infallible,

where her wife holds a role and gets to wield a lightsaber,

a show about taking corrupt religious institutions to task

about the Sith and the Dark Side

and questioning the unquestionable

and exploring whether the good are really so good and if the bad are really so bad.

This was a project written from the heart, and regardless of whether the resulting art found its mark, I think it's important to note that it wasn't written to spread a propaganda message in some "pro-woke holy war" or whatever the hell the YouTubers are peddling.

[nicka-nell]

can i request the getting interrupted during sexy time with kita, sakusa and fukunaga??:3

Hi 😊 of course! Ahhhh, I realized that I've never written anything for Fukunaga and I don't even have a banner for him. 🥲 It was also really hard for me to write something for him because you really haven't seen that much of him in the show sadly. But I tried to write something! I hope you like it. 💚

Getting interrupted during sexy time

Pairing: Kita x, Sakusa x, Fukunaga x reader

Warning: fluff, comedy, slightly nsfw, mdni

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

Kita is a decent man. Someone who has his daily routines and rarely deviates from it. 

But today is one of those days. It’s been raining all day, and a few minutes ago it started storming so hard that you had to come inside and put on dry clothes first. It’s impossible to work outside at the moment. 

You let yourself fall onto the sofa with a sigh, while Kita sits down on the edge next to you.

He stretches out his hand and runs it through your still damp hair. “You’ll catch a cold if you don’t blow-dry your hair,” he says calmly.  

“Later...” you answer, reaching for his hand and giving him a gentle kiss on the back of it before pulling him closer. “But I’m sure I’ll get even warmer when my favorite person takes me in his arms and cuddles me.” 

Kita takes a fleeting look out of the window. It looks like it’s going to storm outside for a while. He can probably forget about farming today. Once again he looks at you, a small smile spreads across his lips before he lies down next to you and strokes your side. 

You rest there together. His bright eyes cast a spell over you and you can’t help but move even closer to him before giving him a kiss and burying your head in the crook of his neck. 

Kita’s hand slides up to your head, strokes you gently. 

This honest and calm manner, you love it so much about him. How affectionately he treats you. Even though Kita is not a man of many words, you feel all his love through little things in everyday life. Like cuddling on the sofa today. 

“Shinsuke... you don’t know how much I love you.” You say, smiling, lifting your head to give him a kiss on the lips before pressing your body against his, so that you lie on top of him. Kita seems a little irritated at first, but a thin smile is quickly back on his face. He puts one hand on your hip and uses the other to tuck a strand of your hair behind your ear. “I know that. Otherwise we wouldn’t be doing activities like this, would we?” he says naturally. “No... I guess that’s true.” You whisper to him before leaning down, taking his face in your hands as you kiss him tenderly. 

Kita’s grip on your hips subconsciously tightens as his fingers begin to caress your body, suddenly touching your bare skin under the fabric of the dress you had put on after the shower. “I’m sorry,” he whispers between your kisses, as if it’s a crime to touch his girlfriend like that. You kiss him again, a mischievous smile on your mouths as you reply in a husky voice, “That’s okay, Shinsuke. After all, we wouldn’t be doing activities like this if we weren’t a couple, would we?” 

Kita just nods in agreement and allows the kiss to become more intimate. You feel his hand move up to your back, pull you further down towards him, as his warm lips linger longer on yours before you break the kiss and look deep into each other’s eyes. 

“What do you say we go into the bedroom and continue this in bed?” he asks soberly. “Why? Does it bother you here? It’s so romantic right now,” you say, feeling the warmth rising to your face. The living room is dark. The fireplace you lit this morning for heating is still crackling slightly, the rain pattering against the large windows from outside and coloring the sky dark gray is soothing. Besides, you live alone in a house on a farm far away from the nearest town or neighbors. So it is also unlikely that anyone could be watching you. 

“But what if...”, “Shinsuke... this is our house. Besides, no one’s going out in this storm anyway,” you interrupt him and straighten up to pull your dress off your body. After showering, you didn’t bother to put on a bra, so now you’re sitting on Kita, completely free of clothes expect of your panties. 

Kita looks to the side, sheepish. He does this almost every time he sees you like this, as if it’s the first time. You think it’s cute and start giggling before you lean forward and kiss his neck while one of your hands sneaks under his shirt.

“You know I’m sensitive in that spot,” Kita murmurs, unconsciously pushing his pelvis closer to yours while his hands rub your back.

You feel him getting hard underneath you, notice how you get all warm at the thought of what’s about to happen. With your heart beating fast, you lift your head and whisper in his ear, “Shinsuke... I want you...” to which he just nods. His hand moves to your butt and slides under the fabric of your panties. “I want you too. “ 

Kita tries to sit up, pinning you beneath him on the sofa before his lips hover over your chest. You can already feel his breath on your soft skin, holding your breath for a moment, when suddenly a key startles you both. 

“Shinsuke, my dear, are you or your sweetheart at home? It’s so stormy today. I wanted to see if you were both okay. I’ve brought kimchi.” The voice of Kita’s grandmother’s rings out. 

“Fuck...” you whisper quietly and you both look at each other with wide eyes before Kita quickly pushes your dress under the sofa and grabs the bedspread lying on the armchair next to it before throwing it over you both. 

“Pretend you’re asleep,” he whispers to you and you have no choice but to nod, because his grandma is almost in the living room doorway. 

When she sees you both on the sofa, supposedly asleep, she quietly apologizes and puts the food she has brought in the kitchen. “Oh my poor little children, you must have worked so hard outside that you fell asleep here in the living room. Sleep, sleep. Grandma doesn’t want to wake you up.” 

All you hear is her starting to tidy up something in the kitchen while you look at Kita, embarrassed and feeling so guilty. 

You forgot that his grandma has a key to the house, of course, because she comes by now and then to help you with the rice harvest. That she’s coming today of all days... 

You wait until his grandma disappears into the bathroom when Kita pulls your dress back out from under the sofa and hands it to you so you can get dressed quickly, before you both straighten your clothes. Just a few seconds later, his grandma comes out of the bathroom, overjoyed to see you both awake. 

You feel so bad that you don’t know how to look her in the eye. 

With Sakusa and you, it really is the absolute classic. 

Who actually comes up with the idea of leaving the TV on when you realize that the mood is suddenly getting hotter and hotter? 

Sakusa had an exhausting training day, you had an exhausting working day and both of you are glad that you don’t have to work or train tomorrow. 

You’ve both showered, got ready for bed and you applied your favorite body lotion before lying down in bed next to Sakusa, who had turned on the TV to watch a replay of an Adlers volleyball game. 

You lean your head against his shoulder, before he turns his head to the side and gives you a kiss on your hairline. “Do you have a new shampoo? It smells good,” he asks, putting his arm around your waist and focusing on the game again. 

“No, that’s probably the body lotion you smell,” you answer him calmly and straighten your upper body again before you stretch your neck as if to tell him that he can smell at you.

Sakusa looks away from the TV and towards you, leaning forward to take a whiff of your skin. You start to giggle and grab him by the neck to pull him closer. 

You let yourself fall backwards, Sakusa on top of you, while you look into his pouting face. “An ambush?” he asks with a feigned annoyed undertone.

“Oh, come on, my entire week has just been so exhausting. Let me spend some time with my handsome darling,” you say, stroking his muscular upper arms. 

When you look at him so lovingly and give him compliments, he can’t help but give himself to you. “If your week has been so stressful, would you like me to give you a massage?” Sakusa asks you. An offer you can’t refuse. 

With a grin, you slip out from under him and pull your shirt up before you lie on your stomach and look back at him over your shoulder. “I don’t think there’s anything better than being massaged by the best man in the world in the evening and being able to sleep in tomorrow,” you say, closing your eyes with a sigh of relief. 

Sakusa frowns and purses his lips. “Really? There’s nothing better?” he says and kneels over you to massage your back. He only occasionally looks up at the TV, concentrating more on you and your soothing little moans as he wanders to your lower back with his hands, massaging over your tailbone. These noises, your warm body under his fingers, make him impatient and he quickly realizes how his body reacts to yours. His pants suddenly start to feel uncomfortably tight. 

Sakusa leans forward and kisses your shoulder blade while his fingers continue to rub your body. “So there’s nothing better?” he whispers in your ear and asks again, before turning back to your shoulders and kissing them gently. “Mmmh well, maybe there’s something else...” you reply in a low voice, suddenly feeling so shy. 

His curly hair tickles your skin, his touch makes your heart quiver and you hold your breath, hungry for more. 

“Maybe?” he asks in a low voice and you notice his hands strolling down to your panties. “Mmh Kiyoomi...” you whisper, wanting to turn around, but Sakusa pushes you back down with his weight. “Stay.” he whispers in a low voice as his hand moves between your legs. You struggle to stifle a moan. Sakusa tries to position his weight on his free arm, also rearranges his legs, when he gets his knee on the remote control and suddenly changes the channel. 

“Do you also have problems with chlamydia, gonorrhea, or syphilis? Itching at the tip of the penis or vagina is always unpleasant, and skin rashes or ulcers can also be a sign of a disease.” An advertising voice sounds loudly on the new channel that Sakusa has turned on with his knee. 

He quickly wants to turn off the TV, but changes the channel again instead. “Do you want sex with horny moms? Come here and call us 69 69 69 666.” The remote control has never seemed so complicated to Sakusa until he finally manages to switch off the TV. 

He closes his eyes irritably and lets his head hang down. “What do you say… Let’s just go to sleep?” he asks, annoyed. 

You also click your tongue, but have to hold back a laugh. The commercials about sexually transmitted diseases or the tele sex ads may have just made you lose your desire, but somehow the situation was funny, and you’ll certainly be able to laugh about it even more tomorrow. Tomorrow at breakfast, or while burning calories before breakfast. 

Shouhei Fukunaga

Fukunaga is a real big hit. You never know what’s going on in his head and what he’ll surprise you with in the next moment. 

Today you have arranged to meet up with your friends to watch a match of Hinata on TV. As you live centrally, everyone is meeting up at your place.

The boys are already there while you prepare a few snacks in the kitchen. There’s music playing in the background and you’re skewering grapes and cheese while Fukunaga prepares some sweets. A few potato chips, nuts and pretzel sticks. 

And what do you do with pretzel sticks? At least as a kid? Back in the day, everyone used to take a salt stick and pinch it between their upper lip like a mustache. Fukunaga, who loves to make you laugh, does exactly this as he turns to you with the salt stick between his upper lip and nose, purses his lips even more and looks deep into your eyes. 

“Mi vida, let’s dance,” he says with a Spanish accent and grabs your hand to bring you into the position you would take in a tango dance. Immediately, you laugh as you try to tell him that you can’t dance. But he pulls you closer to him and, with a feigned seriousness on his face, starts the basic steps of the tango with you on the kitchen floor. 

You follow his steps somewhat awkwardly, still chuckling at this stupid salt stick, causing Fukunaga to laugh briefly as well. While doing so, he drops the pretzel stick before catching it and gulping it down. 

“I didn’t know you could dance Shouhei.” you’re still giggling before Fukunaga nods and pulls you back towards him. After so many years, you still keep learning new things about him. 

“Tango and waltz,” he replies curtly, listening to the music in the background. An old song with a rhythm that goes very well with tango. “Crash course?” he asks curtly and puts his hand on your lower back, placing the other in your free hand to lift it to the side. He takes a slow step forward, another step forward before taking a step backwards, followed by a swinging step and closing the movement. You simply follow him and although you are doing this for the first time, it feels easy because of his guidance.

By doing so, he quietly mumbles, “long-long-weight-ing-step-back-side-close.” With this instruction, you remember it even better and you both suddenly start dancing in the kitchen, completely forgetting that you wanted to prepare the snacks. 

You enjoy it, and this close physical contact, the eye contact he makes with you, it makes you feel like you’re on fire. If your friends weren’t a room away from you, you’d likely be doing something else. Something… more mature, like kissing him passionately, pulling his shirt off, pushing him towards the kitchen counter, and… You shake your head at the thought as Fukunaga tilts his head. 

“Are you okay?” he asks, irritated, and stops dancing, leaning forward to study your face better. “Shouhei... don’t look like that,” you say, so caught that you instinctively turn around. Fukunaga, on the other hand, takes the opportunity to wrap his hands around your waist, pressing your back against his chest before hiding his head in your neck. “You don’t enjoy it?” he asks, sighing softly, his warm breath making you shiver pleasantly. 

“No, no... it’s fun, maybe a little too much fun...” you reply sheepishly and look to the side. “Hm? Then let’s keep going,” he replies short, but instead of dancing, he gives you a gentle kiss on your shoulder, his fingers caressing your sides with a little pressure. 

“Hey, that’s a weird standard step... I doubt it’s part of the tango,” you answer him and lean your head back with a low chuckle. He only meets you with a soft “mhm” before turning you around and giving you a proper kiss. One hand on your lower back, the other on your cheek. He continues to give you little gentle kisses. They are short but loving and you feel your heart start to beat faster, your hands automatically move to his back. 

“Shouhei...” you whisper softly as you feel his lips press more hungrily against yours. Everything around you is forgotten. You don’t care about the music, you don’t notice the laughter from the living room... but suddenly you hear the fridge open, which makes you both flinch and look wide-eyed to the side. 

Kenma stands in front of the fridge, typing something on his phone while he only glances sporadically at your fridge and takes a bottle of juice from it before he walks out of the kitchen as if he hadn’t even noticed you.

Your heart is beating fast. But this time for a completely different reason. Embarrassed, you think about whether you should just go into your bedroom and ignore the fact that your friends are here, or whether Kenma really hasn’t noticed you. He probably hasn’t noticed. It is Kenma, after all. 

Fukunaga, on the other hand, seems quite relaxed about the situation. After all, you haven’t had wild sex in the kitchen or anything. 

After a while, you both walk into the living room with the snacks, trying to keep a smile on your lips as Kuroo grins at you. “So, you guys had a quickie or what took you so long?” he asks, and you feel your cheeks heat up. You hastily try to search for words, but Kenma interrupts you. 

“No, they were still dressed when I came into the kitchen earlier,” he says, looking up from his phone to see the pre-match coverage of the volleyball game. 

So he did see you after all. 

[samkerrworshipper]

revival | arsenal x reader

arsenal reader has been struggling more than she’d ever admit.. when it becomes to much she attempts to take her life but her teammates refuse to let her kill herself when she has so much more to live for.

warnings: do not read if you are triggered by suicide attempt, pill overdose, cutting, severe depression, angst, hurt/comfort

You didn’t know what had gotten you to this stage. Sitting on the bathroom floor of your apartment, staring down at an empty bottle of pills lying beside you on the floor. You weren’t sure exactly what had gotten you here, weren’t sure what switch had flicked in your brain this morning that had made you feel so positively broken from the inside out.

All you know is that right now you can feel deep purple, mauve and maroon bruises developing on your knees, from being hunched over the toilet bowl for so long.

Just when you begin to think that you’re empty, just when you think that there is nothing more that could be ripped away from you, you feel your muscles tense again as more bile is released.

Obviously, you knew the concoction of pills you took wouldn’t sit well, but you didn’t realise it would kick in this fast. You’d figured you’d have time to come to terms with the end of your life, or at least have time to scribble out a not.

But, all the pills you’d forced down your throat now resided in the toilet bowl, a mixture of stomach acid and medication pooling on the surface of the water.

It’s then that you make the decision that it’s time to take a different approach.

As you palm the metal blade, the cold sharp edge gently digging into your skin.

All you can think about is your team, your family, your home.

You think of the cold meal sitting on your kitchen bench.

At first, the metal burns, it stings and sears.

Almost as painful as the burning tears leaking down your cheeks.

Slowly, as more pressure is applied, your wrist is warmed by the pooling scarlett puddle dripping down onto the bright white tiles.

You’ve been sitting on the cold floor for way too long for your liking, your wrists pressed to the flooring to try and calm the burning sensation that’s spread all across your forearms.

If you try hard enough, you can convince yourself that the burning sensation is just another football injury.

You try and picture it, lying on the grass of a pitch, your arm throbbing with pain.

It only works for as long as your brain believes it, which is a total of ten seconds.

It’s been a long day, long week, long month, long year.

A long time pretending you're happy.

A long time try to convince everyone you’re happy.

A long time trying to persuade yourself that you’re happy.

A long time lying.

You’ve become so consumed with the lies that it’s hard to not be completely committed to them at this stage.

The only thing that reminds you of exactly where you are is the cold tiles against your arms, the warm blood and cold tiles mixing together like a thunderstorm.

The only sound to be heard across your apartment is the steady sound of blood dripping onto the tiles.

You think about your goodbyes, think about how this is the end, that you are content with this being it for you.

You’ve been at peace with this decision for a long while, longer than you’d ever care to admit.

It’s not really a decision for you, more like a losing battle.

In the last year, you’ve lost more of yourself than you thought possible, you don’t feel like you belong to yourself anymore, you don’t belong to yourself anymore. At one stage, a while ago, you loved yourself, you cared about yourself, you did your best to care. It hurt, feeling like you were no longer a owner of your body, maybe if you weren’t no longer classified as two different parts would you feel this way, or maybe it would make it harder, because maybe it wouldn’t feel like you were just getting rid of a body that you no longer belonged to, this was all to easy.

Your body was now something to be sold, something to be advertised, something to be purchased by the public.

You supposed that came from being a champion, being famous, being good at what you did.

Maybe, if you’d never become a famous soccer player none of this would have happened, you wouldn’t be lying on your bathroom floor, your vision slowly blurring and your blood leaking out steadily from your arms.

You walk towards the darkness, allowing it to embrace you as you slowly approach it without any resistance.

There was no fight for you, no hope or thoughts of redemption, this was your end, your demise, your final page, and that was okay.

You let the darkness completely cloud your vision, your body slowly being wrapped up by the accepting white light at the end of the tunnel.

It’s warm and comforting and you let your body rest, let it finally have the respite that it was so desperate for.

You felt yourself fade, far away with no intention of coming back.

You’d felt like you were gone, but you were brought back by more overwhelmingly white light in your vision.

Was this heaven?

Was this the end?

Was this it?

You were in pain, your head, your throat, your arms.

It was this thought that made you think you could be wrong.

Was this hell?

Or was the overwhelming white light just your bathroom tiles?

You cancelled out the tile idea, because you could feel your eyelids were closed, which meant that the white couldn’t be sourced from your home.

Your ears were ringing and as everything began to come back to you, it became terrifyingly clear that this could not be any of your previous assumptions.

Death wasn’t this painful, death wasn’t supposed to have any feeling.

Death didn’t feel like a warm bed and it definitely wasn’t consciousness.

This wasn’t the great beyond, this wasn’t the end, this was something else that you couldn’t quite pin down.

As your senses began to come back to you, your hearing and slowly your consciousness you began to become certain that whatever this was, it was not your end.

The sound of a constant machine beeping gave you an inkling as to where you might be, you just silently prayed that you were wrong, silently prayed that you would wake up in your red soaked tile bathroom and not a hospital.

You could clean up, try again.

You couldn’t handle being forced to recover, being forced to talk about your feelings.

It wasn’t something on your agenda, it wasn’t a part of your intricate demise.

You didn’t want to open your eyes, you weren’t even sure if you could, but you wanted to understand your situation, to understand what was happening.

So, you used every piece of your energy that was left, to every so slowly crack open your eyes.

It was more overwhelming white, that took a good deal of blinking to work through, but eventually, a blurry version of your surroundings began to appear in the corners of your eyes.

It confirmed your suspicions, you were in a hospital.

Which you hated, but you had also been prepared for, it made you feel insanely unaccomplished.

It took a lot of blinking and squinting for you to fully take in your surroundings.

The part that stumped you the most, and made you feel like you were hallucinating was the sea of red hoodies that were sitting, sleeping and lying around your room.

It was dark outside, the room was still lit up with machines and the bright white light from the corridor, but you figured that most of your teammates were fast asleep.

It was good, it gave you some extra time to take in your surroundings.

You were covered in cords and wires, your body completely moving even as you tried your very hardest.

Both of your wrists were bandaged tightly, to the point where you were completely unable to even wiggle your fingers.

It was daunting to you, the complete inability to do anything but lie in the bed and bear witness to your inability to do anything besides that.

Just as you were beginning to get truly distressed, one of the red blobs in your peripheral popped up out of their seat, making their way over to your bedside and tracing their hand over your one.

“Hey, ducky, it’s okay, I’ve got you, deep breaths. You’re okay.”

It’s Beth’s voice that hits your ears, and it has the reverse effect, making you more stressed out about the fact that she’s here witnessing this.

“Honey, it’s okay, big deep breaths for me, you’re okay.”

Beth’s hand moves up to your chest, your chest that is covered with a scratchy hospital gown.

“I shouldn’t be here, I-I-I’m supposed to be dead.”

Your words are croaky and chesty, almost unrecognisable but Beth manages to decipher them, and it almost brings tears to her eyes.

“Hey, hey, absolutely not. I thank every single god that you're here and awake right now, it is a miracle that you are here.”

This was not a miracle.

This was a fucking tragedy.

Beth’s face though, it was enough to send a deep pain to your stomach, deep guttural pain that hurt more than anything else.

“S-should be dead, wish I was dead.”

Beth’s face just drops, tears springing from her eyes and falling down onto the hospital sheets.

“Ducky, I promise you, we are all going to try our very hardest to make sure you never feel like that again. Get some more rest, we can sort this all out in the morning but you need your sleep, your body needs rest.”

You didn’t have energy to argue with Beth, so you nodded, relaxing back against the pillows and letting sleep and darkness return to the forefront of your brain.

When you awoke for the second time, it was less painful.

The sun was up this time, your room flooded with early sunbeams.

Overall the hospital was abuzz, to your extreme displeasure.

You were met with the eyes of some of your closest teammates, your words under the stars with Beth at the forefront of your mind as you looked at the extreme disappointment and sadness playing across their faces.

It hit home for you.

They all shared the same expression, all of you sharing the same situation that none of you wanted to be a part of.

“Hey Ducky, how are you feeling?”

Katie’s voice breaks the silence, her tone is full of emotion and you watch her mouth twitch to the side as she obviously tries her hardest to conceal the emotions that she is feeling.

“Like I wish I was dead.”

Nobody laughs, nobody says anything besides purse their lips and bite their tongues.

“We’re so glad you aren’t though, and we’re going to help you.”

We’re going to help you.

It’s five words, seven syllables, and the words that you least want to hear.

“Why couldn’t you just let me die?”

Your words manage to bring tears to the eyes of some of your teammates, you don’t care, all you can think about is the fact that someone, one of your teammates, had the fucking audacity to save you.

Leah’s the person to stand up, and take the same spot that Beth did last night, directly by your side, her hand resting on your own.

“Why didn’t I let you die? Why did I perform half an hour of chest compressions waiting for an ambulance whilst you bled out on your bathroom floor? Because you have a life that’s worth living, you have a gift for football, you are one of the brightest, happiest, smartest, best people I have ever met y/n, and this isn’t the end for you, it can’t be.”

You couldn’t meet Leah’s eyes, not with the knowledge that she had done this to you, she was the reason you were lying in a hospital bed instead of a coffin.

“You should have left me to die.”

Your words are broken, split in half by the knowledge that you were still fucking alive.

“You have a life worth living, kid, you’re only 21, there is so much more you have to give and I’ll be damned if this is it for you.”

You can’t meet any of your teammates' eyes, because it’s clear that they completely disagree with your actions, but there is still a part of you in your head telling you that everything would be better off if you were dead.

Your teammates wouldn’t have to pretend they care, they wouldn’t have too busy themselves with trying to save you from your impending death.

If you had any choice in it, you wouldn’t be this way.

If you could, you’d be happy and smiley, sweet, kind and soft. You’d be consistently happy, you would be the person smiling no matter what and someone easy to talk to, someone easy to love, someone that people wouldn’t let slip away.

You don’t have a choice though, this is who you are.

You are rough edges. You are a poorly labelled bottle of poison that people choke on as soon as they come into contact. You are a box of glass with a fragile sticker plastered all over and yet you still break, harming anyone who comes into contact.

When life gets hard, you quit.

There’s no way to explain why, everyone loves you until life is real and you need help, everyone is understanding until life isn’t pretty anymore.

You’ve never been loved through your lowest moments.

Never been loved when you can’t bring yourself to get out of bed, let alone shower.

Never been loved when the only thing that's playing in your head is how much you hate yourself.

Never been loved when the part of you that everyone loves suddenly dies.

Somedays, you are fairly certain that you are impossible to love. You don't know the kind of happiness love provides, you don’t know how to open up or trust, because no one ever loved you enough for that.

Other days, you remember that you are only 21, and maybe one day it won’t be this way.

You wish you were tender, you wished you were glowy and soft.

You wished you were Beth or Jen, always happy and ready to make anyone who was feeling down feel a little bit better.

“Why couldn’t you have just let me die?”

Your cheeks are practically drowning in tears, Leah reaches up to wipe them, you try to stop her but you instead moan in pain as the searing burn spreads backup your arms.

At the sound of your discomfort Leah is recoiling immediately, her hands falling down to your tightly wrapped arms and pressing them gently back down into the blankets.

“Hey, no, these need rest, you did some serious nerve damage, we won’t know the severity until you’ve got some strength back.”

Fuck.

“Nerve damage?”

Collateral damage had never crossed your mind, because you weren’t supposed to be alive right now, so why would collateral damage matter?

“Yeah, you could have severed or done some serious damage to your nerves, if they are cut then you’ll need a nerve replacement to regain the sensation.”

You blink a few times, staring up at the roof and willing the tears leaking down your face to fo away.

“I should have died.”

Leah, in all of her honesty, nods.

“Yeah, you should have. They had to pump your stomach to get rid of all the drugs you’d consumed, and you need 38 stitches and three pints of blood. You should be dead, but you aren’t and the fact that you aren’t is a fucking miracle.”

You wouldn’t call this a miracle, not from any point of view.

“When can I play again?”

You’re not sure if you’ll make it till that point, but it’s a question worth asking, there are big things coming up, on both a national and club level.

“Excuse me?”

Leah is shocked, and extremely taken aback by your question, so much so that she just stutters over her words.

Before she chokes on her words, Katie steps in.

“Kid, you almost died yesterday.”

You shrug, you figured it was a question worth asking, but Katie’s voice told you that to her it was a stupid question.

“A week? Two weeks? A month?”

You're grasping for something, trying to find the long straw in a pile of short ones.

“Kid, you tried to kill yourself, you almost succeeded, there are bigger things to focus on for you right now then getting on the pitch.”

A part of your brain disagrees so heavily.

“I have to go, they’ll take my passport and my licence and I’ll never be allowed to play again.”

All of the girls share knowing looks, but the general idea is that there is a general discomfort across the room.

“Ducky, look at me.”

It’s Katie’s strong Irish accent, the voice she uses when she’s captaining her national team that forces your eyes from the roof to meet her own.

“They can’t make you do anything, you need to be here right now. There is a treatment plan, you tried to kill yourself, you can’t just leave, it doesn’t work that way.”

Your brain is screaming inside of your skull, pounding against the bone and muscle.

“Jorge never let us take a break, he told us if we ever tried to leave that they would take all of our identification, and our licence to play, I have to play, I was born to play, it’s the only thing I have.”

Slowly, without the efforts of any of the girls, you are starting to unearth some of the serious problems you’ve been dealing with for the last little while, especially coming off of the world cup.

They’d all noticed the change, noticed how after your national teams win, how parts of you had changed.

They all had their assumptions, especially after what happened with Jenni Hermoso and after some conversations with some of their Spanish companions, but nobody could provide an explanation for what was happening behind closed doors.

It was no secret to any of your teammates that Jorge was your biggest critiquer, you and Mapi had tried sticking up to him at the beginning of his career with the Spanish team, and it had landed you both in deep water.

Mapi, had been intelligent enough to leave the toxic environment when it had become too much, when it had seriously begun to affect her mental health.

You however, were not as good at identifying your emotions, and taking care of them, you pushed yourself to the point of breakage, this was a perfect example of that.

“Ducky, Vilda is gone now, you don’t have to worry, I’ll call Alexia, she’ll understand and she’ll talk to them for you. You need a break sweetheart, you need to talk about why you're struggling, there are bigger things to focus on right now than your career.”

You couldn’t disagree more, you were in your prime, you didn’t have time to take a break.

You also didn’t have time to live, there was nothing that plagued your mind more than the idea of trying again, as soon as you could remove yourself from the conservatorship of your arsenal teammates.

“I need to leave, I want to be discharged.”

It’s an attempt at regaining some of your dignity, one that doesn’t last very long.

“You’re on a 72 hour psych hold, 24/7 supervision whilst you're recovering. Everyday you will see a psychologist and after the 72 hours they’ll deem if you are ready to leave, if they believe you can be trusted to leave then you’ll go home with Beth and Viv for the foreseeable future. For the first few weeks, you’ll be under complete supervision, you’ll see a therapist every few days and once you’ve made some serious progress we’ll look at getting you back into training.”

You forced yourself to take a deep breath, and a big gulp, trying to force down the lump that was prominent in your throat.

“You can’t do that, I don’t want to see a therapist, I don’t need to see a therapist.”

Most of the women in the room roll their eyes.

“Ducky, we’ve all been worried about you for weeks, but you refuse to talk to any of us, clearly something led to this and if you won’t talk to us about it you need to talk to a professional.”

You don’t want to admit that a part of you is secretly terrified of seeing a therapist, because what if they see right through you? What if all they see is all of your insecurities and imperfections, just as Jorge did?

“I can’t see a therapist, don’t wanna.”

Before Katie can speak, previously silent Viv stands up at her seat and joins the crowd around your bedside.

“I know it's scary, kid. I started seeing someone when I was around your age and struggling. It was so hard, it was terrifying. I didn’t want to admit I was struggling, and then one of my teammates caught me harming myself whilst having an anxiety attack. I had to go see one to play again, and it sucked to start with, but it helped me so much, we all just want the best for you, and you need help, there is nothing wrong with accepting that.”

The remaining women sitting in the room stand up, surrounding your bedside.

Beth, Leah, Katie, Caitlin, Lia, Kim, Steph, Viv, Jen, Laura and Lotte.

It’s a crowd, and the taller girls have to stand behind because they don’t all fit, and even if they aren’t directly hugging you, you are overwhelmed with the amount of love radiating off of them, it’s too much.

“No-no, I can’t do this, you guys can’t do this to me. There is nothing wrong with me, I’m fine, I’m fucking fine.”

It’s clear that none of them believe you, you expect them to step back, but they don’t.

“No you’re not liefje, people who seriously try to take their lives are not okay. You don’t have to be, we’re all here to support you, you just need to let us, let us be here for you, let us be a shoulder for you to cry on.”

Your breaths shudder, you can’t meet any of their eyes, it hurts you to know that they all think this of you.

“I didn’t mean to.”

It’s a lie that you push out, you're trying to find anything to argue about, anything to distract from what was actually happening.

“Ducky, it would be okay if you did. You’ve been struggling and it’s understandable. All we want from now on is for you to be honest with us, no judgement, just tell us what you are feeling.”

Beth’s voice is so soft, you almost want to give in, but Vilda is in your head, screaming at you for being weak and vulnerable after passing out on the pitch after playing with the flu, and your reminded once again that there isn’t space in the world for people like you to have feelings.

“I want you to fucking believe me when I tell you that I am fine and stop suffocating me.”

All of the women share looks above your head, and somehow, telepathically, majority of them sag off from the huddle, leaving you room.

You're left with the main group of girls who have been controlling the situation.

Viv, Beth, Leah, Kim and Katie.

“liefde, you clearly aren’t fine. Whatever it is, you can talk to us, we’re here for you, whatever you need.”

It shouldn’t cause you to break down, but the pain in your heart and the look in Viv’s eyes sends you barrelling over a very high cliff.

You're sobbing, and struggling to breathe, blood rushing to your ears and preventing you from feeling anything besides the deep depression that has been building up in you for years now.

It hits you like a double decker bus.

Before you can really start to panic though, someone is climbing onto the bed beside you, bringing you into their lap and arms and embracing you.

“It’s okay ducky, we’ve got you, you’re safe with us.”

The sweet nothings are murmured lowly into your ear, the genuinity continuing until the mixture of a mental breakdown and panic attack subside and you’re just a tired, pained mess.

“M’ sorry.”

Your words are hummed into the chest of whoever has climbed in beside you in the hospital bed.

“You’ve got nothing to be sorry for, do you want to talk about it?”

The long answer is no, you don��t want to talk about any of it, but you can’t help the sense that a part of you might feel a little bit better if you let something off your chest.

“Talk about what?”

It’s a genuine question, because there is so much happening in your brain that you aren’t even sure where to start.

“Whatever you’d like.”

You think that’s a stupid statement, because for all Leah knows you could want to talk about the weather, and that doesn’t seem particularly helpful.

“Jorge?”

It seems like starting with the source of your problems probably saves yourself from a lot of beating astound the bush.

“If that’s what you want, ducky, we’re all just here to listen to you, no matter what it is.”

You peak your head out of Leah’s sweater, and you’re met with the supportive faces of the four other women sitting around your bedside.

“When I started for him I was 16. For a long while, the older girls shielded me from him, Mapi and Jenni especially. But my young innocence only lasted so long, when I was 19, he did some really fucked up things, that was when he changed. Mapi, Claudia, Patri and I were the ones who spoke out, and it was the right thing to do, but it put a target on our backs immediately, especially with Alexia out with her ACL injury and unable to support us all. He was so mean to us all, always criticising, never giving us breaks, running us till we were sick or injuring ourselves. He used to wake us up at 2am in the morning to go running because he said we were getting lazy. It was around then that they all signed the statement to withdraw, and I would have loved to do it with them, but I just couldn’t. It only got worse from there for me, especially during the world cup, I was having panic attacks everyday and he couldn’t have cared less. All he did was push me, to the point where Alexia had to mind me everyday because of how bad I was getting.”

You took a deep breath, you wouldn’t allow yourself to look at them, not right now, not until you were done.

“That was when I started to think about killing myself. It wasn’t because I don’t love my life and my friends, but, Jorge was devoting his life to making mine a living hell, and nobody wants that. He never had anything nice to say to me, always criticism, always negativity. Then we won, and none of it mattered, but then there was everything in the press, and I was being slaughtered for all of it because apparently I was enabling his abuse, and I can’t handle that, I can’t handle being told that I enabled abuse that I was dealt for years, maybe I should have told someone, but who? All of the physios, all the doctors, they all worked for him, nobody was going to turn on him. He created an environment where all of us girls were miserable and competing against each other for no reason.”

Leah stopped you with a bone crushing hug.

They’d all heard stories about the Spanish Women’s team, speculation, rumours, hearsay.

But hearing first hand experience from their teammate, somebody they loved, it killed them all on the insides, because how could someone treat their ducky like that? How could someone be so horrible?

“Thank you for trusting us to tell us that ducky. You didn’t deserve any of that, nobody does. From now on, we’re all here for you, you don’t have to hide it all, no more hiding, we’re here for you every step of the way.”

You try your hardest to believe Leah, but it’s a uphill battle, especially when your brain is conditioned to think she is lying.

Leah seemed to notice how spent you were, your body completely relaxed against her, your state near catatonic.

“Get some sleep ducky, we’ve got you, I promise we’ll do everything to make sure you never feel like this again.”

When Leah says it, you believe her, because there is one thing that your mind can’t betray you about, and that is that Leah, and all the other women surrounding you would do anything to protect you, and to make sure that you felt loved, to make up for the lack that you’d been experiencing for the last while.

[dilfl0v3rss]

take it

summary: aran breaking your bad habit

cw: smutttt

word count: 1.8k

── ⋅⋅⋅ ────꒰ ୨ ♡ ୧ ꒱───────

it was a calm saturday night. you and aran were chilling on the couch in your own little worlds. the tv flashing constantly with different images as he played call of duty. face deep in concentration as he and who you assumed to be osamu and atsumu all spoke to each other through his mic. “you keep saying ‘push push’ but when we push we fucking die nigga. we not listening t’you no more tsumu.”

you were paying him no mind, leaning on the armrest as you sat with your feet facing him. phone in hand while tiktok videos played out loud in the living room. while you were scrolling, your attention was moved to a notification on the top of your screen.

emoni💋

twitter.com

look at this shit LMFAOOO

a smile crept to your face as you watched the video your friend sent you, trying your best not to bust out laughing in the middle of the living room.

me

LMFAOOO that’s definitely what she said😭

you continued to scroll through your twitter feed, watching and reading the comments on different posts, eventually getting bored. you thought to yourself “might as well add more to my collection” before making the stupid decision of going into your bookmarks.

your pussy thumped repeatedly in your shorts as you continued to torture yourself with watching video after video on some random homemade porn account. videos of this woman getting her shit tore up left and right. letting her lover do whatever it was that he desired while on camera. in a way it reminded you of how aran would do you. when’s the last time y’all had sex anyway?

your phone was discarded on the armrest as you began to crawl your way to aran’s side of the couch. it was normal that you’d want to cuddle during times like these so he had no problem with you straddling his lap while he continued his game. “you tired?” he asked, but you ignored him. slowly grinding your soaked shorts onto his print. you kept your face in the crook of his neck to keep him from seeing how desperate you looked right now.

aran was just about finish playing his game anyways, mic muted as he laid his controller next to him. the game was still on the home screen since osamu wanted to take a break for some snacks and atsumu wanted to go roll up. aran’s large hands gripped your ass, rubbing and spreading it until he felt your pussy leaking through the shorts on his fingertips. you moved your hips faster to try to distract him, but he was quick. holding your hips still before whispering in your ear.

“easy baby. ian even do nun so why you so wet like this?” his deep voice rumbled through his chest as he awaited your reply. now where you going to really tell your boyfriend that you got horny from watching porn? absolutely not, so you lied. “jus love you so much” you whined, trying your best to get the slightest bit of friction as he continued to hold your hips. aran was very observant, sadly, and he could already tell you were watching porn just by how you kept rubbing your thighs together while looking through the videos on your phone.

you grabbing your earphones didn’t help either, obviously doing so because you didn’t want him to hear. the icing on the cake was your damn glasses. the reflection clear as day every time he glanced in your direction to check on you. he could see every position the man had his wife in. every slap he brought to her ass as well as every time you moved your thumb to add a video to your bookmarks. it was only a matter of time before you came to him so he can fix your little “problem”.

“i love you more, but why you lying t’me?” he lightly pulled your head back before leaning over to grab your phone from the armrest. your horny ass didn’t even turn it off, the video still playing over and over again as he brought the screen to your face. “horny lil thing” he mumbled before abruptly moving you off of him. while he started pulling his sweats down you got the memo to do the same. shorts discarded on the floor as you sat in nothing but his shirt. “this what you want right?” he groaned. large hand stroking his length to life. “y-yea”

“then take it.”

your body moved on its own, quickly straddling him again before lining him up with your entrance. pretty brown eyes slowly rolling back as you sunk down on top of him. inch by thick inch of his long dick rubbing fluently against your tight walls. “fuckk” you moaned as you bottomed out on him. aran watched each of your pretty face expressions, holding a light smirk as he waited for you to start bouncing. “cmon mama. this your dick”

you eagerly got started, bouncing your pretty ass up and down as you caressed the nape of his neck. aran picked up his controller, closing up the game before opening netflix and putting on a show. he knew eventually you’d get tired and ask for his help, but he had other things in mind tonight.

you weren’t a lazy lover, but it’s been brought to his attention that you’ve been a little spoiled lately. you never really did anything for long before you’re complaining bout how tired you were and how he needed to help you. whether it be riding him or throwing it back. aran was sick of this behavior since sometimes it’d be you coming to him begging for some dick then barely even working for it. just laying under him or letting him fuck you from the bottom. he wasn’t going to let that happen tonight though. if you wanted this dick he wasn’t going to just keep giving it to you how you wanted, you were going to have to take it on your own.

it was only about ten minutes into the show where your pace slowed down almost to a stop. hips grinding on him as you whined in his ear. “i-i can’t” “yea you can mama. you gon have to if you wanna cum cause ian helping” you moved your head from his neck, staring him in the eyes with a sad expression on your face. aran could tell you were asking “why?” without even having to hear you say it. “daddy’s tired, but you can do it on your own, right pretty? can make yourself feel good without my help”

you shook your head at this. aran knew your body like the back of his hand, dick always touching places in you that you didn’t even know where there. you knew how to ride him, but it was much different from when he would help you. and you’d get so tireddd. you didn’t have time for that, huffing as you replied to him. “s’not gonna be as good without your help. i cant-”

“sh sh sh. ion wanna hear nun. get that nut on your own.” he didn’t want to hear your excuse. hands lightly gripping and tapping your ass. you sighed, starting back up to a slow pace. ass clapping repeatedly on his thighs as he continued to watch the show as if you weren’t there.

after about ten minutes, your legs began to feel as if they were on fire, tears flooding your eyes as you cried over aran’s shoulder. “p-please baby, i can’t d-do it on my ownnn” your salty tears were wetting up the back of the couch as you were grinding your hips down in his dick. no more energy in your legs for you to keep bouncing. “please fuck me” voice small as your crying quieted down to just sniffles and hiccups. aran didn’t realize how much he’s spoiled you until now, but he didn’t care.

“keep bouncing ma” was all he said, brown eyes glued to the tv, paying you no mind as you started crying and whining again. “s’not fairrr.” you stopped your hips completely, seated on his dick fully as you gave him a defiant look. aran looked down at your petty action, smirking before sliding his hand to your neck. his palm pressed against your throat as he lightly began to squeeze it. the next thing you knew, your face was snatched closer to his, ear right by his mouth as he spoke deeply. “keep bouncing that ass on me princess. if you stop before i tell you to, we gon have a problem y’hear me?”

your pussy instantly began to soak on his dick. his words making butterflies go wild in your stomach as you felt him release your neck and place both of his palms back on your ass. caressing and skin before helping give you a few warmup bounces before letting you continue the action on your own. you kept your pace slow, trying to save energy so you didn’t tire yourself out quickly. he didn’t mind this, liking the feeling of your wet walls slowly gripping and moving against his dick. his tattooed hands rubbing all over your back and ass while he kept encouraging you to keep going.

“uhh huhh jus like that princess”

“see? s’not that hard is it?”

“making daddy feel so good right now”

the praises made things easier, ass bouncing a little harder as you quickened your pace. aran’s bored and uninterested act broken as you listened to him moan under you, hips stagnant as he let you take whatever you needed from him. you started moving your hips in circles as you kept bouncing, dick hitting your sweet spot as moans flew from your lips as well. “feel s-so good shittt” you moaned as your wetness began to trickle down his shaft. your were tired as hell, but you knew if you tried to stop you’d get in trouble. deciding to stay on his good side tonight and pushing yourself to bounce even harder.

aran’s head flew back, adams apple bared to you as he roughly bit his lip. just the sight of him made your pussy flutter, bringing you closer to your climax as you picked up your pace again. you bounced quickly, chasing your orgasm as aran’s grip on your ass tightened. “there you go ma. take what you need. love when you listen t’me” his words pushed you over the edge.

you gave him three more hard bounces before your pussy began leaking all over the cushion. body spasming as his dick was fully soaked. you breathed heavily, try to catch your breath over him before you moved to get off. his big rough palms stooped you. inked hands gripping tight on your thighs. “wha-”

“you not done yet pretty, help daddy cum next.”

[thetxtdevil]

Heyyyyy can u write something about reader getting caught by kai while using a vibrator. Like i imagined an escenario where reader is waiting for kai at the hotel room while kai is out with the boys in the US (since the relationship is a secret, reader cant be seen w them) and she misses him so much and she starts getting horny by some thoughts and starts playing with herself with the vibrator bc she thought kai was going to arrive much later. Poor little thing gets caught with her legs spread open, dripping wet and moaning so loudly by her beloved boyfriend 😙 (i live by soft dom kai so his reaction will be according to it lmao)

Please and thank u, love ur works hehe💗

--nsfw--

You wait in the lobby of the hotel Kai lead you to through text message. He said he would meet you there to give you a key but here you were sitting on a chair feeling awkward. Flipping through the provided magazines on the coffee table you hear loud conversations very distinct not only from the foreign language but the familiar tone of each member of your boyfriend's group. You smile to yourself standing up to look at the men to suddenly have your stomach start to flutter when you see your boyfriend Kai. It's been so long since you two have been in the same vicinity his presence hit you like a truck. You study his much broader shoulders and his arms were very muscular, his once dusty blue hair were now long dark locks which exaggerated his angelic features so well. Your heart rate pumps a faster when you see his chocolate eyes glance at you. You felt like a high school girl when you became shy as Kai walks towards you.

"Hey beautiful"

"You're the beautiful one."

Kai chuckles getting as bashful as you "lies."

You wanted to grab his chin to look at you but your resisted, "you know I don't lie" He smiles puffing out his chest in confidence, then Kai's eyes widen as if he remembered something, patting down his pocket he pulls out a small card. "Do you have a pen?" he asks and you quickly search for one in your purse. He starts writing something and hands you the card and pen back.

"This is my room key and I wrote down the level and number. I'm going out with the band but I should be back later."

"Oh okay, thanks." You were stunned to see him leave fast watching him go back to the group of men. You awkwardly smile and wave at Yeonjun and Taehyun who were staring at you in suspicion.

"Who's that" Yeonjun nods towards you.

"Oh... uh- a fan" Kai nervously messes up his hair hoping to hide his blush, "noticed her around so I thought I'd finally give her an autograph"

---

You took a deep breath as you bring the electronic key to the pad on the door handle. Making sure you have the right room number once more you swipe the card resulting in a small green light blinking. Opening the door you waddle in with your duffel bag. The room was like any other hotel room, clean, nice bed sheets, warm light, but there was a beautiful view of the city. Admiring the cars stopping and creeping forward, lights illuminating the area making the stars in the sky barely visible. You stop looking to get yourself comfortable in the room removing the extra layers you had on.

Falling onto the bed you let out a huff of boredom. You let your mind wander to your meeting with Kai from earlier, how handsome he is, how big he looked, how much you wanted to graze your fingers along his milky skin. Closing your eyes to imagine him above you, his light sweet kisses pressing into your lips asking about your day or simple "love yous", and his big hands grouping your breasts. As your thoughts go wild your own fingers explore yourself and a hand massage your tit. You flex your thighs together, back arching, your whole body shaking from arousal. You stop for a moment to remember that you brought a little toy for tonight.

Digging through your bag your hand touches a solid object. Picking it up knowing its your handy wand ready to be used. You study the curves of the vibrator remembering how much Kai love to tease you with it. When you both started dating Kai was a little inexperienced with little knowledge of selfcare so you took it upon yourself to show him the great pleasures of sex toys. Stripping away your clothes settling back on the bed you tease your nipples once more. Reaching for the vibrator clicking it on to fill the air with a light buzzing noise. Pressing the vibrations against your clit instantly shot pleasure through your body making it hard to not get needy. You tease yourself over and over again swiping the wand against your folds but never fully fucking yourself.

A small sound of metal of the door knob clicks but was quiet enough to not be noticed by you. However, your smalls gasps and breathy moans could easily been heard from your boyfriend who came through the door. He walks in quietly to see his beautiful girlfriend spread out before him. His cheeks burn a fiery red, big doe eyes shy away embarrassed that he caught you in such a position until he starts to hear your juices that sounded so delicious to him. All his attention came back to you especially when your moans became calls of his name.

He watches the curl of your toes, every spasm of your open legs leading down to your glistening folds moving around your vibrator. Kai's secret cover was compromised when a drawn out groan escaped from deep within him. Your teary eyes open to look around the room finding Kai standing perfectly in front of you, your legs framing his body.

"Kai, angel, I missed you so much a-and I couldn't wa-"

"canieatyouout"

You eyes widen at his abrupt request but then soften as you widen your legs as a sign of welcome. Kai gets on his knees getting a hold of your hips to push you towards him, towards his face so it was morphing into your pussy. You pant at his luscious muscle lapping up every part of you and his nose bumping into your clit so lovingly. Kai lifts his head to grin at your fucked out state then catches a glimpse of the forgotten wand. He grabs it and as his lips latch onto your clit he shoves the vibrator deep inside you receiving a shocked gasp.

You feel lightheaded by the deep penetration. Your vision begins to see stars with every suck and lick of your clit. Looking down at the sight of your boyfriend, Kai, his long dark hair hiding his face that was already hidden in your cunt, his broad shoulders keeping your legs far apart, one hand thrusting the wand in and out of you while the other explores your soft skin. God did you miss him...

A nuisance,

TxT's Devil

taglist: @inkigayocamman, @naoristerling, @incogrio

[frenchkisstheabyss]

♡ 𝔸𝕟𝕕 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕪 𝕎𝕖𝕣𝕖 "ℝ𝕠𝕠𝕞𝕞𝕒𝕥𝕖𝕤" ♡

♡ Mature Content! Minors DNI! Warnings below the break ♡

♡ Pairing: ot8!boyfriend!ateez x chubby!fem!reader

♡ Summary: A nice, calm, wholesome movie night with your boyfriends except I lied and nothing but absolute filth happens.

♡ Genre: smut with a sprinkle, a smidge, a barely visible flake of plot

♡ Word Count: 3.6k-ish

♡ Warnings: (issa lot happening so pls lmk if I miss anything) masturbation (f), use of toys (f receiving), oral (f & m receiving), anal penetration & eating (f receiving), unprotected sex (ya'll know not to do that irl!), creampies, edging, double vaginal penetration, things get rough, scratching, gagging, pet names (good girl, bad girl, slut, le usual)

♡ A/N: I wrote this with the intention of writing this soft, romantic piece but my mind got lost in the gutter and built a home there so here we are. Thanks to @anyamaris for supporting me in my nonsense as she always does.

Even with the air conditioner on, a wave of heat washes over you. Two fingers---your fingers---press firmly against your clit. You know your body better than anyone in this room. Every flick of your wrist makes your walls clench around the vibrator Hongjoong’s fucking you with. The ultra-soft silicone curves to rest its flat tip directly on your g spot. He keeps it at medium speed, the low hum of the toy a hypnotizing instrumental to the weakened moans leaving your lips. “You’re so beautiful” he whispers, delicately kissing your thigh. And you are.

Lying in the middle of your living room floor on a pile of the fluffiest pillows, you’re the prettiest thing any of them have ever seen. The plan had been to watch a movie. Horror---comedy---who cares? How could they watch anything but you? Legs spread wide. Pussy weeping, begging you to keep going just like that. Your panties, moist beyond measure, are looped around your ankle. The tight plaid mini skirt you wear is pushed up, not denying them a bit of your plush belly. Your nipples are two, tightly beaded indentations in your black crop top. They brush against the cotton each time your chest rises, turning you on even more.

It’s getting harder to play with your clit. Your muscles are tensing like a rubber band stretched near its breaking point. Your wrists are going limp. Your legs are shaking, causing your thighs to jiggle so deliciously that Hongjoong can’t resist nibbling at them. What he loves, what gets him off the most, is simply to watch you make a mess of yourself. “Mmm, Joongie. I’m gonna cum---” you gasp, arching against the pillows. Hongjoong’s laugh is nearly undetectable but you hear it, oozing lust. He’s happy with himself and with you. Pulling the soaked vibrator from your core, he pushes three fingers into you.

“Cum for me, princess. Cum around my fingers.” Hongjoong moves your hand away from your clit, wrapping his lips around it in a small O shape. Your arms fall above your head, your head turning to catch Yunho staring at you from the couch. Yunho looks spaced out. It’s as if his mind is off somewhere far away but that couldn’t be further from the truth. His mind is on you and no one else. It's fixated on the way your eyelids flutter when Hongjoong suckles at your clit. It’s committing to memory that sweet little smile you shoot him right before you lose control of your body. 

Hongjoong’s been edging you for an hour all for this moment when he can finger you hard and fast, tonguing your clit as pleasure rips through your body. You’re grabbing at nothing---at anything---to ground yourself but it’s no use. “Hongjoong. Fuck” you whine, struggling to find your breath, “I can’t. Too much. Too---fuck.” Wooyoung rises from his spot on the recliner to kneel above your head. “Let me help” he coos, kissing you on the forehead. His fragrant sable locks dance around your cheeks like curtains, shutting out the rest of the world.

Smooth hands massage their way up your arms, loosening your muscles as they tighten. Fingers press into your shoulders---tickle your collarbone---traverse the arches of your breasts to circle your nipples. Woo slips your shirt up, laying his hands flat on your breasts. He kneads them, pinching your nipples in his palms. “Woo---” you moan, “Joongie---ah.” You mindlessly writhe beneath them. Hongjoong’s knuckles are grinding against your slit. His fingers---they’re so deep---spreading you open even wider. 

Woo smiles down at you and there’s something so genuine about it because it is. “He’s right---” he says, “You’re so beautiful.” Woo drags his tongue across your lips just as Hongjoong’s tongue swirls between your pussy lips. There’s an audible squelching sound when his fingers pop out of you, the suction of your walls holding onto him for dear life too relentless to let him go quietly. Hongjoong gets up on his knees, sucking at his fingers, and admires the way you’re still clenching for him. He’d edge you more---keep you like this all night---but he knows he has to share.

With one last kiss which he plants on your lower belly, he leaves you in Woo’s capable hands. Woo reaches over you to run a finger across your slit and you giggle at how much it tickles. When he leans forward you get a clear view of how hard he is and catch yourself salivating. You bring a hand up to rub against his bulge. A groan emerges from somewhere deep within him, “Bad girl.” Still a tad loopy from your orgasm, you fumble your way up onto your knees. “But you love it, don’t you?” you tease, your hand reaching down to rub against him again.

Woo nibbles at his bottom lip, pulling you closer to him. You run your fingers through his hair, tucking a rogue strand behind his ear, “Up.” One word spoken in the singsong voice of an angel such as yourself has him up on his feet without question. Just as you reach for Woo’s zipper, strong arms grab you from behind, locking you in their embrace. “Choi San!” you gasp, admiring that dimpled grin of his, “I’m kinda trying to focus here---” San kisses down your neck, dipping one hand between your thighs.

His other hand cradles your chin, fingers pinching into your cheeks, and turns your head back towards Woo where a throbbing cock, arousal moistening the tip, waits for you. “Then focus---” San says, lightly squeezing your cheeks. You let your tongue fall free, resting it on the underside of Woo’s cock. Rolling it around his sensitive tip, you collect the warm salty liquid on your tongue. San lets go of your cheeks, giving you the room to bring your hand up and grip Woo’s base. You glance up at him and he’s already fixed on you. They stay that way as your fingertips trace the veins traveling up his shaft, stroking back to his base and starting all over again.

San raises your ass enough to slip his cock between your thighs. Somehow he’s even harder than Woo and you haven’t even touched him yet. “You wanna fuck me, Sannie?” “Hmm, is that how we ask?” he growls into your neck, grinding against you. Poking your ass out, you lay your head back onto his shoulder, “I want you to fuck my tight little cunt, Sannie. Please.” San grips you by the hips, sinking into you with zero patience. A vibrator has nothing on San’s cock. Woo tangles his fingers in your hair, sliding his thickness between your lips.

Bobbing your head back and forth, you suck your cheeks in---fan them out---mimicking the exact thing your pussy’s doing to San’s cock. It’s a flawlessly choreographed dance between the three of you. San bucking his hips, feeding you every inch. You rolling back against him, taking him like a--- “Pretty little slut---” San’s panting, the slobber dripping down your chin from sucking Woo off making you look like exactly that. Woo holding your head steady while you pump his glistening length, your hand and mouth working together to put his stomach in knots.

With Woo stuffing your cheeks, your screams are muffled when San picks up his pace. “Is this what you wanted, baby?” he says, slapping you on the ass. “Mmpphh” is all you can manage, Woo’s cock hitting the back of your throat. Woo and San bounce you back and forth, whispering praises that have you back on the edge in no time. Your hips stutter, cluing San in that you’re close, and his pace becomes unforgiving. Woo scoops up one of your breasts, pinching your nipples, feeling their weight in his hand. “Don’t stop---shit---y/n. So good. Don’t---” Woo twitches between your lips, pumping his seed directly down your throat.

Never one to be wasteful you drink him down, massaging his balls with your free hand. “Fuck---pussy’s so good y/n---gonna cum” San hisses and you’re cumming again. He cums with you, ropes of white painting your insides from the other end. Woo leans forward, kissing your puffy lips, “I’ll get you some water.” “And a popsicle please.” Woo and San look at each other---back at you---at each other---back at you. San straightens out your skirt, “What for?” Your gaze dances over to Seonghwa and the two of you immediately begin to blush. “We---uh---” Seonghwa stutters, “Don’t worry about it.”

Yeosang politely moves Woo and San away from you. “Excuse me. Sorry” he apologizes, moving between them to sweep you up into his arms, “We’ll get the water.” It’s not that you don’t know Yeosang can pick you up but every time he does you melt. Yeosang carries you toward the kitchen and Seonghwa’s right behind him. “And the uh---yeah.” Jongho hops up to follow them, pushing through San and Woo with zero of the politeness Yeosang offered. “Thanks though” he grins, patting Woo on the shoulder, “But not really.” 

“Oh my---that’s---that” you gasp, pleasantly surprised at how much you enjoy the sensation. Seonghwa bending you over your dresser and swirling a popsicle in your asshole wasn’t on your 2023 bingo board but he has you wondering why it never was. The chill of the popsicle is calming in a way. You were overheating for a bit there but now? You feel tingly all over. With the popsicle melted and your thighs coated in drips of sticky, strawberry syrup, Seonghwa goes to work licking it off of you. His long tongue trails up your left thigh---down your right thigh. It comes back up to your ass, nibbling at the plush cheeks and making you squeal. He stays there for a second kissing them, massaging them, tickling them with the tip of his tongue.

“Hwa---mmph” you moan, eyes rolling to the back of your head as he tongues your candy-coated asshole. Imagine having an itch. Not just any itch. One of those itches that makes it difficult to focus on anything else. One of those itches that refuse to be ignored. But you can’t reach it. No matter how hard you try, your arms just aren’t reaching until---oh god---you finally do. You scratch it and it’s so good that your legs could give out. Nothing, not a single thing, compares to how uniquely amazing that feels. That’s what it feels like to have Seonghwa making figure eights in your ass like his tongue's a professional figure skater.

While you’re bent over seeing stars, he maintains a shaky hold on his cock. Each stroke is slow and deliberate, in sync with yours. “Fuck, you taste so good” he mumbles, fully prepared to smother himself if it means tasting as much of you as possible. You hear a moan you’ve heard a dozen times before. Seonghwa tries to suppress them when he cums even though you wish he wouldn’t. Usually, he hates being messy but his cum has already glazed over his hand and the afterglow is heaven. “Fuck it,” he says to himself, falling across the bed. Spinning around you come face to face with Jongho. “Hey ya cutie” you beam, poking his cheeks.

Sometimes people say that he’s scary, mean even, but when you look at him all you see is your cuddly bear. You drape your arms over his shoulders for support, “Your turn?” Jongho effortlessly lifts you onto the dresser, kissing you like he’s been waiting forever to do it. And he has. “My turn.” He presses the head of his cock against your clit and there they are again. The hot flashes. That thin layer of perspiration on your skin. Jongho grabs your arms, pinning them behind you, and drives into you. “You’re still so wet.” “Not still” you whisper, “This is just for you.” Jongho thrusts into you and you’re full again, his cock much thicker than you remember.

Your exhausted muscles can hardly hold up to being fucked this hard but you don’t have to worry about that. In his arms, you don’t have to worry about anything besides feeling good. He could keep you steady all night if Yeosang weren’t snatching you away, tossing you on the bed. “Yeosang!” you shout, sliding back on the bed, “You can’t just throw people around like that!” Yeosang climbs on top of you, pushing your shirt up, “I can’t?” He brushes a thumb across one of your nipples, lapping at the other as his fingers massage your breast. “You can---shit---do it again” you surrender between shallow breaths.

Yeosang slips into you, his cock pulsing in time with each rise of his hips. His defined arms slip beneath your body, hands locking just behind your back. When he flips you over on top of him, it’s like your whole world’s been turned on its side. He bounces you up and down in his lap, the tremors traveling far behind your core. Just as he picks up a rhythm Jongho tears you away from him, propping you up against the wall. You’d make some smartass comment about Jongho not being good at sharing. If only there were time enough for that.

His arms are already tucked behind your knees, supporting your weight as he fucks you against the wall. “You’re such an addictive little slut, you know that?” he says, and your heart flutters. You just love when he sweet-talks you. The angle he has you at is perfect for stimulating your g spot. He’s bumping right up against it and you’re clamped down around him, as addicted to him as he is to you. “Can I borrow this?” Yeosang asks, peeling you away from Jongho and tossing you back onto the bed. 

This time you’re on your knees. All fours is simply out of the question with how completely destroyed you are. “Are you just gonna toss me around all night?” you whine, burying your face in the blankets. Seonghwa lays his head beside yours, nuzzling up to you. “Of course not” he assures you, his voice warm and comforting, “I won’t throw you around when I have you. A light roll maybe---” 

“Pirates! Cowboys! Biker gangs!” you mumble incoherently, jolting awake. Shaking off those incredibly strange dreams, you realize that you’re still in bed. Judging from how dark it is in your room, it’s well past midnight. You must’ve fallen asleep after what your aching muscles are telling you was a wrestling match with a bear. A barely awake Yunho tightens his arm around you from behind, “Cowboys? I’ll do anything for you but I am not putting on a cowboy costume.” “I will,” Mingi yawns, cuddling up closer to you from the other side, “I get nice boots. Probably a cool jacket. Ooh, some guns---”

“There are no guns!” you interrupt, “When did you two even get in here?” Yunho shrugs, “A few hours ago. You never came downstairs and we missed you.” The “we” he’s referring to is obvious when you notice how hard he is against your back. “You fell asleep on us” Mingi pouts, a hand running up your thigh to squeeze your ass. You drape a leg around his waist, smooching him on the nose, “Don’t do that.” “Don’t do what?” Mingi pouts even more, knowing how soft you go for him when he does this. “That! You guys are both being so---” “So?” Yunho asks, his long fingers reaching between your legs to stroke your pussy. 

You shiver at the contact. Having Yunho behind you, his cock pressing into the small of your back, his fingers teasing you, makes your heart race. Mingi spreads your thighs, giving Yunho more than enough room to curl his fingers into you. “Finish what you were saying.” “I---uh---” “Uh---uh” Mingi mocks, petting your cheek. You move to playfully slap him but he grabs you by the wrist, kissing you before you can even consider trying anything else. Yunho eases a third finger into your core, “You like it when I play with your little cunt, don’t you?” “Mm-hmm” you hum, lidded eyes glossing over.

Yunho stays focused on tapping your sweet spot while Mingi hypnotizes you with his lips. Mingi has you so drugged, so completely entranced, that you don’t even notice when one of Yunho’s fingers is replaced with his. It’s not until there are four of them inside of you, two of Mingi’s and two of Yunho’s that you feel the difference. Feel the intensity of the stretch. “I think she likes it” Mingi grins, rubbing his thumb against your clit. Yunho follows suit, slipping a thumb into your ass. “Fuck---yes---Yunie---Mingi---mmm!” you cry out, so overstimulated that your eyes begin to water. 

They grind into you harder, forcing out screams louder than any you’ve made tonight. “Please---inside of me---wanna feel you. Both of you” you whine, so lost in how badly you want them that you don’t realize what you’re asking. Mingi slides his hand out, smearing your juices between your folds, “Aah, she’s adventurous tonight. You sure you can handle that?” “I-I can. Ah, shit. I need it.” Yunho spreads his fingers in a V, rolling them around inside of you, stretching you from every angle. Mingi brings the head of his cock to splash in the juices leaking from your needy core and Yunho pulls out of you, focusing instead on freeing himself from his pants.

For a fleeting moment, it occurs to you how fucking insane you are. Mingi and Yunho at the same time? It’s not only the thickness, it’s the length. You wonder if you have a death wish. Mingi guides himself into you, only the first inch, sending shockwaves through your system. If this is how you die, you figure, at least you’ll die happy. Yunho spits into his palm, moistening his length before he brings it to meet your already occupied slit. Mingi slides in another inch or two, keeping his cock flush against the roof of your walls. Yunho raises himself into you, taking his time to watch for any signs that you’re uncomfortable, “Let us know if it’s too much, okay?” You make a little squeak to acknowledge how nice it feels to be protected, even when he’s in the process of tearing you in half.

He begins to slide up into you, pausing to let Mingi push in a little more, then taking his turn again. It’s a toe-curling, lip-biting back and forth to get them both inside of you. Once they are, you're falling apart, screaming, digging your nails into Mingi’s arm. Pulling his shirt up over his head, he gathers the material and shoves it in your mouth. “We don’t want them to think we’re killing you.” You’re so full, stretched beyond your limit, that only one of them can fuck into you at once. There’s no room for anything---or anyone---else. You belong to them. “You’re always worth waiting for but shit” Mingi grunts, his length throbbing, as much as it can given the space.

There’s moisture on your cheeks. You’re crying. Not from pain. No. That initial sting gave way to pleasure once they were both finally inside of you. You’re crying, drenched in your own tears, because parts of you are shifting that you didn’t even know could. Every stroke has your ears ringing, your heart in your stomach. You feel heavy and weightless all at once. The darkness of the room swallows you while somehow managing to be blindingly bright. There’s an explosion somewhere inside, releasing the building pressure. You’re at your peak again, legs kicking like you’re dangling high up. It hits you hard. So hard that you’re not breathing. Breathe, girl, breathe!

Just as you catch your breath and think that you’re maybe---maybe---coming down, Yunho's filling you up like a donut. Mingi pulls out, tapping his head against your clit as warm cum sprays against you. Correction: Filling you up like a glazed donut. The three of you collapse, unable to do much else besides make a series of broken noises. “Hmph mmm mm hmph,” you say? Scream? Mumble? Mingi throws his arm across his chest, understanding your incoherent huffs, and takes the shirt out of your mouth. You pat him lovingly on the head, “Thanks.” 

Readjusting yourself on the toilet, you rub the partially melted popsicle between your legs. This is nowhere near sexual in nature. You’re just in desperate need of relief from how sore you are after the day’s events. “Aah, yup, that’s the spot” you sigh, “Seonghwa really was onto something.” “Was I?” Seonghwa asks, rubbing his eyes. You jump a bit, startled by his sudden appearance in the doorway. Seonghwa stretches, dragging his feet into the bathroom.

As adorable as he is in his pajamas, his hair a complete mess, seeing him right now isn’t ideal. He shakes off the sleep, taking his time to process what’s going on. “Is that a---” “Ssh, if you tell anyone---” Seonghwa’s cheeks turn rosy, a smile spreading across his face. He takes you by the hand, bringing you to your feet, “Come on.” “Hwa, hold on, do you think? I wasn’t--no. No!” You reach back to drop the popsicle in the sink but Hwa pulls you along. “Hold onto that.”

[mattslolita]

come thru - m. sturniolo

warnings ; fingering , oral ( female receiving ) , slight!dom!matt

"you make wanna come thru, quarter after two, just to put it down on you."

you invited your best friends over for a movie night, like you had done since you guys had been friends since you were all younger — it was a tradition amongst you all, every weekend you guys rotated between yours and the triplets house.

right now, they had just arrived at your house, and you already laid out all the movie options for them. chris immediately made a beeline for your fridge, causing you to shake your head and roll your eyes.

"chris, you realize i'd like to actually have a pepsi for myself for once, right?" you said, turning to follow the boy into the kitchen. "you always raid them all."

"yet you keep buying them for me," chris grinned, and you leaned over the counter and shook your head at him.

you were just in an over sized ransom tee that belonged to matt and some short shorts underneath — it was quite common that you wore these types of clothes around them, so it wasn't unusual. though you had to admit, wearing a borrowed shirt from matt was making you hope he would notice.

you were definitely good at hiding it, but the feelings you've had for matt were growing even more by the day — the way he'd playfully flirt with you sometimes of course was making matters worse, and you wondered if there was a chance matt might have felt the same way as you.

now with all the snacks in tow, everyone went to their designated spots in the living room — chris was in the chair closest to the tv, whilst nick took the loveseat and decided on spreading out all over it. you and matt took the sofa, and he placed his arm behind the chair.

you could feel your cheeks get warm at the action even though he was always doing stuff like this. you tried to play it off by letting a small sigh escape your lips, and bringing your sprite can up to your lips to take a sip.

matt noticed the sigh and turned to you with a raised eyebrow. "you good?" he whispered in your ear as he leaned over.

your breath hitched and you clenched your legs together, giving him a tight-lipped smile. "i'm alright."

thankfully the movie had already started, and you found yourself more interested in it. but as the movie went on, you couldn't help but subtly look over at matt from time to time — his blue eyes were focused on the movie unlike yours currently, and you swore you were about to go crazy at the way one corner of his mouth lifted in a smirk when a funny scene came on.

your eyes then roved over his tattooed arm all the way down to his ring clad hands, finding yourself wondering how good they would feel inside you.

and that's where you drew the line.

you stood up quickly, already feeling yourself become hot and bothered, causing all three of the triplets to look up at you in confusion.

"the movie's not even done yet," nick commented, and you shot him a weary smile.

"yeah i know, i'm just...not feeling too good," you lied.

"what's wrong?" matt asked with furrowed eyebrows, and you waved him off.

"oh it's nothing, i'm just kinda tired," you lied again, "i'm just gonna go up to my room and lay down for a bit."

"you want me to come up there with you?" matt asked, beginning to stand up.

"no!" you answered quickly with wide eyes, causing his eyebrows to furrow, "sorry...i'm good, though. y'all finish the movie and just clean up when you're done. you can crash here for the night if you don't feel like driving back home, matt."

chris just shrugged and stuffed his face with some chips whilst nick nodded sympathetically and blew you a friendly good night kiss — matt watched you as you walked upstairs quickly, before he turned his attention back to the movie playing.

once you got into your room, the first thing you did was close your door and let out a big sigh, then you went to dim your lights and turn on some music — the triplets already knew you went to sleep with music for the most part, but sleep wasn't exactly what you needed the music for.

you sat back on your bed as you pulled your shorts off of yourself and slowly ran a hand over your lace underwear, feeling the slight wetness. throwing your head back, you closed your eyes and thought of matt, causing a small moan to slip from your lips.

"fuck..." you sighed, picturing matt as you rubbed circles around your clit, biting your lip to suppress a moan.

you completely ditched your underwear as you continued rubbing circles around your clit, imagining matt's voice in your ear telling you how good of a girl you were being for him.

a slightly louder moan escaped your mouth but you were too caught up in the feeling to care. "fuck, matt..."

"woah."

the sound of matt's voice caused you to gasp loudly as he stood there with his jaw slightly dropped, looking at you in shock and — amusement?

your cheeks burned as you found yourself wanting to fall off the face of the earth. "um...how much of that did you witness?"

"enough, actually," matt said, a slight smirk appearing on his features as he walked into your room and closed the door behind him. "so i'm who you think about when you touch yourself, y/n?"

now your cheeks burned even more as matt watched you with an amused expression, and you found yourself unable to form words. embarrassment filled your body at what just happened. "this is so embarrassing, what the fuck."

you hung your head as you felt the bed dip in front of you — matt lifted your chin with his index finger, prompting you to look up at him. "don't be embarrassed, sweetheart. all you had to do was ask for some help."

a low gasp was about to escape your lips before matt crashed his onto yours, silencing whatever sound was to come out of your mouth next — your tongues battled for dominance but you let matt do all the exploring in your mouth.

as he continued kissing you his tattooed arm went down to race circles on your thighs, causing a small whimper to escape your lips. a smirk resided on matt's features against your lips.

he began tracing circles near your inner thighs, causing you to whimper again at the way he was teasing you — his ring clad hand finally found its way in between your thighs, as he rubbed your folds back and forth.

"matt, please," you begged, "please touch me."

"what's that, baby?" matt whispered in your ear, running a hand ever so teasingly over your folds, "you want me to touch you?"

unable to form words at how crazy he was driving you, you just nodded with a little whimper — without warning, matt shoved one of his ringed fingers inside you, causing you to let out a loud whine.

"oh matt..." you moaned out, as he repeatedly pumped his finger in and out of you, "fuck..."

"look at you, fucking my finger like the needy slut you are," matt whispered into your ear, placing a kiss on your neck, "you like it when i touch you like this, don't you?"

"fuck, i really do matt," you whined, as he added another ringed finger inside of you just then.

the pace of his fingers sped up inside you, repeatedly hitting your g spot as you arched your back to give him more access — moans and whimpers repeatedly escaped your mouth as matt continued working his magic inside you, then you felt that familiar feeling in your stomach.

"matt, i'm close," you whimpered out, as he still left kisses along your neck, "i'm gonna cum."

matt stopped with his fingers inside you and took them out, causing you to look at him with furrowed eyebrows — with a grin he licked your arousal off of his fingers causing you to bite your lip as he spread your thighs and pushed your stomach back.

"i want you to cum all over me, sweetheart."

you felt your pussy pulsate at the way matt looked at you hungrily, as he peppered kisses along your thighs — he left small kisses on your folds causing you to whine out. "matt, don't tease me..."

he smirked up at you then shoved his tongue inside you, nipping and sucking on your clit. you moaned out at the feeling, arching your hips upward as he maintained eye contact with you while lapping up your pussy.

"fuck y/n, you taste so fucking good," matt groaned as he came up momentarily, his lips covered in your juices.

your hand went down to tug at his hair as he continued eating you out, and you felt the feeling in your stomach yet again. "oh my gosh, matt i'm gonna..."

"give it to me, baby," matt breathed, "cum all over me."

you released all over matt's face, a plethora of moans and a string of curses leaving your lips as your grip on his hair tightened slightly — matt lapped up all your juices, coming up from between your legs and grinning down at you, his face coated in your arousal.

"you have no idea how bad i've wanted to do that," matt breathed out, as he fell down on your bed beside you.

you had finally caught your breath from the mind blowing orgasm and upon realizing what he just said, your cheeks heated. "you should've been done that."

matt turned to the side and smirked at you. "so does that mean you'll let me more often?"

"if it's gonna feel that good every time, then hell yeah," you giggled, "let's just hope nick and chris don't freak out."

( i hope you enjoyed this my loves, sorry for not posting the past two days ! i love you all, muah💌 )