#how to get a website

[curehaus]

immortal companions

[meriablog]

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[inkskinned]

even 2 years ago people still said autism with a whisper. it was also how people sometimes whisper lesbian, like they're afraid of uttering a slur. autistic was either an insult or it was something terrible, a horrible burden only select people endure. "select people" were usually 9 year old boys and skinny white men.

they are not hispanic young adults with a dog and a life and friends. i can make (sustained, calculated, painful) eye contact. with certain people, i don't even have to count how many seconds i am holding their vision - i can just look at them. i can wear clothes that bother me, i will just have a worse day than usual. i might cry about any changes to my schedule - but change is scary! this is normal!

when i was 16 it was OCD. i mean that was the thing everyone said. i totally have ocd. they would arrange 6 colors of gel pen in rainbow order (no worry for indigo feeling left out) and they'd be "so ocd" about it.

if you struggle with intrusive thoughts, be careful at this next paragraph, but. at 16 i developed a compulsion that involved self-harm. my ocd was convinced i was simply forgetting that i'd hurt someone terribly - a thought that persisted for no clear or delineated reason.

at some point i will probably write about how the idea of "morally pure thoughts" was hell for me and others with ocd, but this was the odd dichotomy for many of us: they liked our "aesthetic", but were genuinely repulsed by our lived experience. "intrusive thoughts" now means "cutting your hair in the sink" instead of talking yourself down from believing horrible things. "so ocd" is a label without any true understanding.

it's something i've talked about before - in multiplicity - but i firmly believe in the veracity and necessity of self-diagnosis. i think it saves lives and it saves tragedies from occurring. as someone raised in a house that wasn't safe, self-diagnosis was, for many years, the only viable option. 15 and honestly googling: am i depressed or are there demons affecting my behavior.

but it is not genuine self-diagnosis anymore, most of the time. it is a strange, blanched version of that whispered word autism. now certain traits are constantly seen as "autistic" - any passing intense interest. any flubbed social interaction. people say it while laughing - a touch of the 'tism.

and i like the acceptance! i do. i like that people are talking about it. i like that if i self-identify, more people speak up and say me too, bitch. but there is something-else quietly happening, the way it happened to OCD. the quirky, "fun" parts have been washed and sanitized and removed of all suffering. now it is just something that makes you "a little bit silly."

it took me 27 years on this planet before i learned to make friends. something about me just seems incredibly odd, i guess, some kind of radiation monitoring. someone once (in a way that was almost friendly) told me i am doing the right things, but in a way that's off-putting. i have scoured myself raw attempting to be charming.

someone on tiktok does a deep dive into their particular passion. the top comment says "what kind of autism is this lol". like we are a breed of animal. like it has no influence on our experience. like our life is a fresh breeze, an open meadow.

more often for me, life was a drowning.

[emilnikos]

ok now that we're done with all that lets go make potions (mabel juice)

[hotvintagepoll]

I make these posts every once in a while but I think it's worth mentioning again that if you're interested in trying out old movies, a good option is to always see if your library includes any streaming service options you can access using your library account. Using library-supported streaming services is great because 1) supporting the library's programs means the library keeps getting funded 2) it's literally as easy as any paid-for streaming service 3) old movies are fun. I have access to Kanopy and Hoopla through my library, and here's a small sampling of what's available on them right now to stream for free:

Kanopy

Seven Samurai (Toshiro Mifune)

Body and Soul (Paul Robeson)

My Man Godfrey (Carole Lombard, William Powell)

Barbarella (Jane Fonda)

Tokyo Story (Setsuko Hara)

Nosferatu (Max Schreck)

Cabinet of Dr. Caligari (Conrad Veidt)

Charade (Cary Grant, Audrey Hepburn)

The Apartment (Jack Lemmon, Shirley Maclaine)

Wuthering Heights (Laurence Olivier, Merle Oberon)

Rashomon (Toshiro Mifune again)

Metropolis (Brigitte Helm)

Umbrellas of Cherbourg (Catherine Deneuve)

Hoopla

The Court Jester (Danny Kaye, Glynis Johns, Basil Rathbone, Angela Lansbury)

Chitty Chitty Bang Bang (Dick Van Dyke, Sally Ann Howes)

Sunset Boulevard (Gloria Swanson)

A Place in the Sun (Montgomery Clift, Elizabeth Taylor)

Moby Dick (Gregory Peck)

Hud (Paul Newman)

War and Peace (Audrey Hepburn, Henry Fonda)

Wings (Clara Bow)

I haven't seen all of these movies, so don't consider these recs, but this is a great cross section of genres, hotties, and well-known films if you're looking for a place to start. Use your library! It's fucking free!

[justskyla-art]

rhinestone eyes

[koko2unite]

[shittyutmv]

What’s Core Frisk been up to recently?

thought this would be a good ask for their birthday! sorry for inaccuracy it's been a while since I read anything about core frisk core frisk by dokudoki

[doctormori]

hey wanna see a silly fucked up headcanon I had

HYPOTHETICALLY him drawing these triangles is a mindless cry for his parents, that maybe, if they weren't entirely gone, they'd be there watching him.

[variousqueerthings]

i do think that specifically david tennant being very openly supportive of the trans community has had an interesting effect -- because usually im kinda like "it is nice to know that people whose work i enjoy don't want me dead" and that's kinda my level of (at this point) quite cynical engagement with what a celebrity or artist does or does not think about transness, because these days it feels like it's almost fashionable for well-known (or post-well-known) people to come out of the wordwork and say what they think about trans people, which can get very stressful in its own way (the amount of headlines that try to be misleading or just plain don't say and so you're just like "ok i guess this week i have to find out if [spins wheel] thinks i deserve rights")

but david tennant has a different feeling to it. and to be fair, there are plenty of people with skin in the game, who absolutely deserve to and ought to speak out on behalf of their children/partners/community/friends/family/etc. and im always happy to see these people speak, and dt is included in that list as well

but david tennant is veeery specific in this here country of terf island, in which the labour party will openly state that it will allow certain book writers to affect their policies on trans people, and that's partly because of the effect above in which "having opinions on trans rights seems to be a celebrity game that keeps you relevant, which includes ex prime minister tony blair making his opinion known (hint, it wasn't a good one)" but also because david tennant is known as a national icon to rival that of whatsherface

he was the main actor on doctor who, in the top three, if not very top of british broadcasting iconography that exists. he's one of this generation's most famous shakespearian actors, the other thing that this country-as-culture is most proud of. he's a mainstay in children's film and tv, a standout in modern british crime drama (broadchurch, des), and that's not mentioning things like jessica jones, good omens, and star wars

this guy has no social media, and some of the biggest cultural capital in the uk today -- labour i believe it was made a twitter joke about him ousting the current prime minister as the doctor ahead of this week's election, because that's an iconic scene from doctor who

which means that when he openly calls transphobes whingy and asks them to shut up, there's a bit of a ripple... i mean what are you gonna do, get angry with the doctor? from doctor who??? the man who played a definitive hamlet????? the man who's just done rave reviewed performances of macbeth???? scrooge mcduck????????? this man who occasionally guests on cbeebies???????????

said prime minister and his party and hosts of transphobes go absolutely crazy every time he makes an appearance wearing new trans ally apparel, as if a. he sees any of that and b. it's a dignified response to a man saying, in essence, "i would like my kid to be safe and happy"

david tennant constantly making these statements, again and again, is a powerful voice in the modern fight for trans rights in the UK, in some ways unfortunately, because you wish trans people could have been heard before it got to this state and that it wasn't about being famous, but to be fair, he's also making that point again and again

it kind of feels like the first time in a long time that there's been proper pushback against transphobia in this country from a perspective that the transphobes can't dismiss so easily -- they can try but like. again, one side is a bunch of raving nonsense-spouters on a joke website who mostly belong to a party that's about to get decidedly ousted from the political scene, the other is beloved national icon and star of stage and screen, mr david tennant

of course, it doesn't hurt that the three main actors of harry potter and everyone else who's majorly involved in doctor who, past and present, is also supportive of trans rights, which maybe there's a separate point to be made about the strangeness of a mainstream tv show becoming a cultural battleground for peoples opinions on equal rights, especially now with ncuti gatwa at the helm, because i think some of what ive seen in relation to dw is more extreme than any piece of cultural media ive been alive to witness bigoted reactions to (including star trek), and ncuti gatwa as a black queer man is taking a hell of a lot of flack that is racist and homophobic

but labour... if you're inviting random artists to give you opinions on trans rights, david tennant is right there, and you know he'd make sure to bring along trans rights activists and professionals to get the space in the room they ought to have had all along

[laniidae-passerine]

positively obsessed with how Rockstar Lestat is the exact kind of guy one of my friends would show me a picture of and swear he’s really sexy and cool and brilliant. Whole time I’m thinking “oh dear GOD” staring at a trainwreck weirdo and wondering what’s happened to everybody else that is absolutely missing me. jesus christ he’s blond

[voidedtea]

[ID in alt]

my pieces for @strawberrij's thespius fashion zine!! quite the endeavour and adventure that turned out pretty neat i think :]

special thanks go to @ratchetclankarecute for posing/cloth references + the bulk of the image descriptions! that first image would Not have happened without them <3

[hanizmiyu]

Azul core:

"No monetizing,Ashengrotto" NAH EVEN TREIN KNOWS HIM LMAO

Did he always act like this even in class? ROFLMAO

Bros is a salerman but seriously people will just pirate it or smth

LMAO BROS GREEDY

If Azul is a sin he will be greed😞🙏

Also LOVE HOW LUCIUS LOOK LMAO

BRO IS A CUTIE PATOOTIE 😭😭💞💞 HE JUST A CAT🥹

[yvisoul]

Different portrayals of Alexander and Elizabeth Hamilton.

names in this list.

[icecreampizzer]

if 15 year old me was here today she'd be screaming and crying right now