#how until she was maybe 16-18 y/o she thought holding hands with boys she liked would get her pregnant

[gxlden-angels]

I don't know if it's the religious trauma or the dead mom trauma but the conservative christian insistence on not teaching children about their bodies in school and insistence that this knowledge should be private in all circumstances with no exceptions should be seen as suspicious at best and criminally malicious at worst

[mysticalgalaxysalad]

An Old Love Doesn’t Rust

Ship: Paz Vizsla x Din Djarin

Fandom: The Mandalorian/Star Wars

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: yearning, two idiots in love trope, feelings, detailed smut (18+), unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it, folks), oral sex, porn with feelings, fluff, romance, set after Chapter 16

Summary: Din accepts his fate with the Darksaber on the Mandalore. While preparing a ball for Mandalorians, he unexpectedly meets an old friend from the past and feelings come on the surface.

Words: 3.2k (what the fuuuck, i have never written this much for a oneshot, holy shit, i impressed myself at this point)

It was difficult to settle without him.

After Din let Grogu leave with Luke, he felt empty. He knew that he’ll miss his son. And that Grogu will miss him too. But there was something, that he needed to do. Din looked at the Darksaber and sighed. He wasn’t ready for this, but this was the Way.

       Few months later…

„..and these flowers will be there…“

Din was already exhausted. As the Mand’alor, he was throwing a ball for his fellow Mandalorians. And it was pretty big event. His assistants were talking too much and at some point Din caught himself to be dived deep into his memories. Especially in his memories for certain bigger boy in dark blue Beskar armor…

Paz Vizsla. The name of a man Din thought of very often. Of his best friend. Oh, how much Din wanted to see that big blue di’kut again! In those rare moments, when Din dared to be vulnerable with himself, completely honest, he missed Paz in ways he would have never thought he would. He missed his deep voice, when Paz was talking about practically anything he had on his mind, his wholehearted laughter, when he and Din had gotten away with some mischief, his like dark night sky blue, shiny armor, his touch, when Paz patted Din on the back, when Din was choking on a piece of juicy fruit…

Din was so caught up in his thoughts and feelings about Paz, that he didn’t notice his right hand Mandalorian in purple Beskar saying him something. He remembered himself only after Mandalorian patting him on his shoulder.

„What’s going on?“

„Sir, I think it’s time to prepare for the event,“ Mandalorian nervously stepped.

„Oh yes, that ball,“ Din sighed and got up. „Thank you for noticing me,“ he nodded at Mando and left to prepare for the night.

          Later that evening…

„Ladies and gentleman and others, welcome to the ball,“ Din, dressed in his silver Beskar armor, which was shinier and overall looking better than usually, started his first speach as the Mand’alor. All Mandalorians, also dressed in their shiny armors, listened to him very attentively. Djarin didn’t speak for too long, although he seemed to be very calm and confident, his heart was nervously pounding in his armored chest. He spoke about what he thought was important and from his heart.

„And now, let’s the fun begin. This is the Way,“ Din finished his speech with Mandalorian creed, and everyone could feel the smile in his voice.

„This is the Way,“ Mandalorians chanted cheerfully. Some of them even chanted Din’s name. Din blushed a little and smiled under his helmet. As he was watching his fellow vods having fun, he caught sight of very familiar blue color. And he felt suddenly his heart to stop.

That familiar blue color could originate from the only one source. In that moment, Din knew, who it was. It felt like Maker had heard his most secret hopes and dreams. Maybe…maybe he could be happy again.

Stunned Din watched his long lost friend Paz talking to Bo-Katan. Suddenly, he felt a lump forming in his throat, his mouth dry like Tatooine sands. Will Paz still remember his friend from childhood? And how did he leave Nevarro? Where had he gone after that shooting? Din’s head was full of questions he hoped he’d get answers to soon.

„…and then we saved Grogu and I lost the Darksaber,“ Bo-Katan grumpily rambled about their adventures to her new object of complaining, Paz, who really tried to listen to her, but he kept daydreaming, just as Din.

„So, who’s the new Mand’alor?“ Paz interrupted Bo-Katan’s venting, much to her annoyance.

„Look for yourself, big blue boy,“ she smirked.

Paz groaned. Something about the way she said „big blue boy“, irked him. He was about to say something ironic to her, when he noticed she left. Good, at least I’ll get some peace now, he thought. But not for long. When he turned to see the famous Mand’alor, he froze.

Paz would not have been much happier for his helmet than in the very moment he saw Din on the Mand’alor throne. His dark, sparkling eyes went comically wide, plump, soft lips, which had never kissed yet, slighty parted. It felt like all his thoughts, words were thrown out of Paz‘ head. He couldn’t even tell, what exactly he felt at that moment. Relief, happiness, doubt, that Din would not remember him, or something, that made his lower parts tingle? Probably all at once, if Paz would be absolutely honest with himself. And maybe something more. There was always something more with Din.

As the ball continues, Din felt himself very tired. But since he saw Paz, he could say, that something in the air changed. He also knew, that he wouldn’t be able to sleep without talking to Vizsla, but it seemed Din couldn’t get to him. Every few minutes someone wanted to talk with him.

While politely conversating with another Mando, he caught Paz‘ visor staring at him and suddenly the world stopped existing. It was like each other of them could see each other’s sould and it was intense and burning. Din’s breath hitched and his blood changed into something similar to molten lava.

He politely excused himself from discussion and nodded at Paz to follow him. He headed to a small part of garden, protected by a bunch of bushes with beautiful, soft looking bloody red flowers with thin petals and honey-sweet smell. Mand’alor didn’t turn his back to see, if Paz was really following him. Paz was.

When they got into that secret garden spot, Din slowly turned to Paz. His whole body lightly buzzed with nerves and sweet anticipation. For a few minutes, there was a silence, filled with a tension and something else. Promise.

They stared at each other for a while. Then Din moved and Paz moved too and they hugged like their lives depended on it. Mand’alor sighed happily. Paz‘ strong, big hug provided him security and comfort Din never knew he needed. Untill now. And when he got a taste, he could never get enough.

„Djarin, so you’ve made it to the Mand’alor,“ Din could feel the grin and proud in Paz‘ raspy voice. He, after all, was grinning like a fool himself under his Beskar bucket. „I see you’ve made it pretty good too, Vizsla,“ Din said, then he whispered softer. „I thought you’d died.“ His black visor met Paz‘ one.

„Y-yeah, i was succesful with leaving Nevarro, but I had to stay low since then,“ Paz explained, his voice sounded little bit choked. „Otherwise I would get in touch with you, but I thought it would bring you unwanted attention from those kriffing Imps and I - I didn’t want to endanger you, Din,“ Paz‘ voice got softer and softer with every word spoken. And I was afraid you wouldn’t remember me, Paz thought of.

Din was awestruck from what he just heard. After a minute or two, when he regained his composure, he spoke again, voice filled with an emotion he couldn’t quite entitle. „You could never endanger me, ner vod,“ and before he could stop himself, Din’s hands grasped Paz‘ helmet carefully and he stepped on his toes to clink his silver bucket against Paz‘. Din didn’t think about it twice. It somehow felt…so right.

To say Paz was overwhelmed, was a big understatement. He knew since he had seen Din for the first time after such long time, there had been something between them. He could feel it with his whole body, mind, soul. It was syrupy thick and sweet and hot and so intense, it consumed him. It brought emotions in Paz, which he wouldn’t even dare to call it.

So, he just stood there, absolutely dumbstruck, and gulped dry. His heart was pounding in his chest. Before he could do anything, Din let go of him. Paz was still quietly processing, that his best friend just kissed him in Mandalorian way, when Din did another thing, which took Paz Vizsla’s breath away. Din Djarin, the new Mand’alor, took off his helmet.

Paz knew he should scold Din for what he had just done. Broken Creed atc. However, he couldn’t bring himself to do so. All he could do right now, was to think about how Din looked so beautiful in the moonlight. His dark brown eyes, deep as the galaxy surronding them, reflected the light of stars above them. His helmet hair were wet with sweat and full of soft curls. And the pink, plump lips…Stars, Din was a sight for gods. Paz slightly shuddered. His mind was flooded with very tempting pictures of Mand’alor himself, writhing beneath big blue Beskar Mandalorian, his mouth creating perfect ‚O‘ shape, as Paz hit that heavenly spot inside Din, which made Din see not stars, but whole galaxies…His body reacted to these images very precisely and he was thankful for his codpiece, as he was already hot and throbbing in his pants.

Din noticed Paz‘ quietness and his tremble. He had no idea, why it happened, but he slowly started to be afraid, that Paz was disgusted by what he had done. Oh, if he only knew…

There was a flesh of insecurity in Din’s eyes and Mand’alor took a step back. This alarmed Paz, who got into his protector mode. „What’s wrong, cyare? Did I hurt you? Oh, kriffing hell, I didn’t-“ Paz would probably continue in his rambling, if he didn’t see Din’s surprised look with a hint of hope. And Paz realized, what he said. But there was no way in hell for him to take it back. Paz simply couldn’t hold himself anymore.

„Yes, Din, cyare,“ and now was time for Din to be in shock, because Paz copied his gesture with taking off the helmet. Din gasped, when Paz came closer and slowly, as if Din was made from a fragile materiál, caressed his blushed cheeks. His whole body throbbed with need. „So beautiful,“ Paz whispered and lowered himself to Din’s face. „You-you’re very pretty yourself, Paz,“ Din answered and looked at him with silent plea. Paz obeyed. His lips touched Din’s and it was burning like a wild fire. Slow, gentle kisses quickly turned into more needy, hot sensual ones. Both men after a while groaned into each other’s mouth, and that just spurred them more. It was sinful and passionate and just everything they wanted.

„We should také this somewhere private, Djarin,“ Paz panted into Din’s ear, when he licked his earlobe and sucked it. „Ye-yeah, we should- oh, kriffing stars,“ Din groaned, when he felt Paz‘ lips on his neck, sucking a mark on his tender spot. Under Vizsla’s touches, Din quickly changed into needy, trembling mess, he was so touch-starved.

Finally, Paz reluctantly let go of Din, picking his helmet. When Din got his helmet too, he nodded at the man with blue Beskar to follow him. They quickly walked through garden, too eager to feel each other’s body. After few minutes, which felt like eternity, they got into Din’s private quarters, and the moment the door closed behind them, they were on each other again.

They eagerly stripped of Beskar, it was laid randomly on the floor. Neither of them cared. Paz sucked another mark into Din’s neck and tugged on his T-shirt to pull it off of Din. When Din was half bare before Paz, Paz also took his shirt off. „Mmm, so beautiful,“ whispered, as he was kissing every inch of Din’s tender skin. By the time Paz got to his nipples, Din was a panting mess, back arching into Paz. „Shhh, Din, I know, I’ve got you. I’ve got you, ner cyare, let me take care of you.“ With those words, Paz sucked one of Din’s erect nipples, licking and carefully biting it slowly, while kneading the other one. Din let out a loud whimper, his hand went straight into Paz‘ soft, fluffy hair. His body shook and Din thought he could cum just from his nipples being sucked.

Paz paid the same attention to the other nipple as well and Din’s groans of pleasure got louder. When Paz felt Din’s nipples gor enough attention, he slowly kissed, licked and bit Din’s torso to his stomach and lower abdomen. „O-oh, it feels s-so g-good, Paz,“ Din panted, while Paz sucked few more hickeys into his skin. „And it will be better, love,“ Paz purred and tugged on Din’s pants. Din lifted his hips, so Paz could get rid of it. It was also tossed on the floor and Paz turned to Din’s rock hard cock, leaking precum all over. 

 „Holy shit,“ Paz whispered to himself, as his mouth watered at the sight. He couldn’t resist to lick Din’s length and taste him like the best lollipop. The sinful groan he let out, went straight to Din’s cock and Din thrusted his hips instinctively. „S-sorry,“ he exhaled. „Don’t have to be, love,“ Paz winked and let Din slide into his warm and wet mouth. Din’s mouth shaped perfect ‚O‘, as Paz‘ mischievous tongue licked along Din’s velvety dick. He never felt anything like this. Everything, what Paz did to him, made his blood change into wild lava and reduce him into whimpering puddle. And  after one particularly good suck Din found himself teetering right on the edge. „P-Paz, I-I think I’m gonna-“ That was when Paz let him slide of his mouth with loud ‚pop‘.

Din pushed himself up on his elbows and with loud disappointed grunt looked at his lover. Paz shushed him again. „I will také care of you, my sweet boy, do not worry,“ he also undressed and bared himself to Din. And at the sight of naked Paz, Din lost his ability to speak. Paz was big and thick and beautiful. And very aroused. Paz pumped himself few times, smearing his precum all over his cock. „Do you have lube?“ „In a nightstand,“ Din nodded, his voice raspy from moaning. Paz found a small bottle and squirted a good amount of gel on his fingers. „Will you let me take care of you, Din?“ Din nodded again, opened his legs slowly and leaned back on the bed, trying to relax for Paz. Paz smiled and kissed him.

„That’s my good boy,“ he purred and at first he just touched Din’s hole with his wet fingers. He looked at Din’s face for any sign of discomfort, but when he didn’t find any, he carefully pushed one finger in. Din closed his eyes and grunted. It was slightly uncomfortable, but eventually he got used to Paz‘ fingers sliding in and out of him. It also helped that Paz used a lot of lube too. All this time Paz was praising him. „My sweet boy, take my fingers so good. Oh, you’re so beautiful, my love.“

Din felt absolutely wonderful. Paz‘ fingers always hit that one spot inside him, that made him keen and lean into Paz‘ touch. „A-ah, Vizsla, yes, yes,“ Din moaned and grabbed the sheets beneath him, as if to anchor himself. After earlier edging, he was worked up and felt on the edge of heavenly pleasure once again. But Paz had apparently other plans and stopped stimulating Din.

„Paaaz-“ Din pouted and looked at him with almost teary dovey eyes. Although he quickly shut himself, when he felt Paz nudging at his entrance. Paz took the lube again and squirted a lot of it all over his cock. „I-I’ve got you, Din, my love,“ Paz whispered and slowly entered Din. He groaned deeply and when Paz was fully seated inside of Mand’alor, he leaned to kiss him passionately. This allowed him also také a breath, because of how tight and warm Din felt around him, Paz felt like he might combust right and there.

After a short while, Paz set slow, sensual pace. If Din thought this couldn’t get better, he was painfully wrong. And also painfully hard. But Paz proved his earlier words, when he grasped Din’s beautiful weeping cock and started to pump him. Din’s moans and grunts got two octaves higher, and under normal conditions, he’d be embarassed for it. Now he couldn’t care less. Not when Paz was looking at him, as if Din hung all the stars on the sky himself. Not when Paz‘ sight was full of passion and so much love for him. That was moment Din knew he was done for.

„I-I love you, Paz,“ Din panted and his one hand caressed lovingly Paz‘ scruffed cheek, while the other one hugged around his strong, broad shoulders. „Y-you do?“ Paz‘ hips slowed for a second and he leaned his forehead against Din’s in Keldabe kiss. „Ni kar’tayl gar darasuum, Din,“ he growled, his pace quickened again, his hands pumping Din matching the pace of his hips. At this point Din was almost screaming from intense pleasure, and Paz was very happy about it. „Now, be a good boy for me once again and cum, Din, let me feel you, ner cyare,“ bigger man mumbled into Din’s ear and slightly sucked it.

That praise sent Din over the edge and oh, did he cum. With a loud groan of Paz‘ name and curses in Mando’a, he climaxed all over Paz‘ hand, his stomach and some of his cum even made it to his neck and chin. The sight of climaxing Din and the feeling of him clamping hard around Paz, triggered Paz’s own orgasm and he climaxed inside Din, panting Din’s name, before he collapsed on blissed out Mand’alor beneath him.

They both laid like that for a short amount of time, listened to each other’s heart. Then Paz slided out of Din, and smaller man whimpered weakly at the loss of him. Paz chuckled. „I’ll be right back, mesh’la,“ he stated and in a while he came back with warm cloth to clean Din. But he had to admit to himself, it was pretty hot to watch his load leaking out of Din. After Din was cleaned, Paz cuddled to him and tucked them both under soft blanket. Din happily sighed, soft smile on his face. He never felt as relaxed as now, laying on Paz‘ chest.

„You did so well for me, Din, I’m proud of you, my love,“ Paz whispered lovingly into Din’s hair, peppering him with kisses and caresses, where he could reach. Din’s smile got bigger and it tugged on Paz�� heart. He always wanted to see that gorgeous smile. Then Din spoke quietly.

„Did-did you mean it, Paz? Do you love me?“

„Yes, I do, Din. I’m never leaving you ever again, my love, I promise,“ Paz kissed Din’s forehead, nose, both cheeks and finally his lips and it was so soft and full of love.

„Stay with me, please,“ Din asked, kissing Paz‘ handsome face. Paz smiled, and it was biggest, happiest smile, which made him look so much younger and light-hearted.

„With my biggest pleasure, ner Mand’alor.“

taglist: @sunsseto45​ @pedrosaccent​ @charcharlonglegs​ @ahoeformando​ @latenightsthoughtsnstuff​  @randomcollection-o-stuff @just-fics-i-read @tibbietibbs

anyone who wants to be tagged in this, just let me know and i’ll add you :D i just forgot who else wanted to be tagged in my fic, i’m sorry for it :(

[smolfelton]

Love, France - Part 22

1  ♡  2  ♡ 3  ♡  4  ♡  5  ♡  6  ♡ 7  ♡ 8  ♡ 9  ♡  10 ♡ 11 ♡ 12 ♡ 13 ♡ 14 ♡ 15 ♡ 16 ♡ 17 ♡ 18 ♡ 19 ♡ 20 ♡ 21 ♡ 22 ♡ 23 ♡ 24 (coming soon)

The ride to Draco’s flat in his silver Mercedes was like a blur. After quickly leaving the tower, Draco had led him to his car and practically shoved him in, throwing the occasional glance over his shoulder. Harry’s mind was so busy buzzing that Draco’s odd behavior nearly went unnoticed and his sense of time completely left him. Before he knew it they had arrived and Harry was being led into the blond’s flat, heart pounding in his chest the entire time.

“Why don’t you get comfortable?” Draco suggested and removed his suit jacket, then folded it and set it on the arm of a chair. “Would you like some tea?”

Harry followed suit, removing his own jacket and doing the same before nodding quickly. “Um, yeah. Tea sounds nice.”

Draco nodded and disappeared hastily, leaving Harry alone in his rather posh-looking parlor. Harry sat on a fine dark green velvet sofa which looked like it belonged in a mansion rather than a flat, and felt quite out of place. He couldn’t help but feel like a sort of commoner in the company of a noble, sitting on said-noble’s sofa while said-noble was making them a cuppa. Just the thought made Harry feel ridiculous.

The blond man reappeared only a few minutes later with a tea tray in hand, then set it down on the table before sitting next to Harry. He crossed one leg over the other and fixed his hair, combing his fingers through it in the process. Harry couldn’t stop himself from reaching over and tucking a stray lock of hair behind Draco’s ear, earning him a surprised look in return.

“Sorry,” Harry said quickly, blushing as he pulled his hand away.

“It’s quite alright,” Draco said and smirked. “After that kiss I don’t think a little bit of touching is so outlandish. Don’t you think?”

“Y-Yeah,” Harry stuttered, watching as Draco’s perfect, slender hands moved to take his cup. “Was... it alright?”

Draco stopped and looked at Harry, teacup only an inch from his lips.

“Was what alright?”

“The kiss,” Harry said, feeling himself blush even hotter.

Draco smirked and took a long sip of his tea, then set it back down on the tray. He leaned back and pulled his legs up on the sofa, bringing one knee to his chest and wrapping his arms around it. He gave Harry a coy look, and the sight made his stomach do a flip.

“It was... acceptable,” Draco said.

“Acceptable?” Harry asked, eyebrows furrowing in confusion. “What does that mean? Was it- Was it no good?”

“I didn’t say that, Potter,” Draco snorted, obviously amused. “But if I had to rate it on a grading scale, I would give it a B. Perhaps a B+ for effort.”

“Oh,” Harry said simply and looked down. “That’s... not so bad I guess.”

“But I bet you could do better,” Draco said. He moved his fingers to cup Harry’s chin and tilt his head back up. “Would you like a re-test, Mr. Potter?”

“N-Now?” Harry asked, eyes wide.

“No time like the present,” Draco answered, leaning towards him ever so slightly. His fingers moved from Harry’s chin to his face, and Harry felt his eyelids flutter shut as Draco’s soft hand cupped his cheek.

“O-Okay,” Harry replied and opened his eyes. His breath hitched in his throat at how close Draco had gotten, their noses only a few inches apart.

Before Harry could do anything, Draco kissed him first. His soft pink lips pressed against his own with only a bit of pressure, and it took Harry a moment to begin kissing back. When he did so he received a lovely hum from Draco.

Harry’s heart raced in his chest as they kissed, and his mind was buzzing so loudly that he couldn’t even hear his own thoughts. His hand moved up to hold the back of Draco’s head, long white-blond hair running smoothly through his fingers as he did so. The kiss turned a bit more passionate as Draco’s mouth opened slightly, his tongue sliding along Harry’s lip in the process and making the bespectacled boy’s heart leap in his chest.

Harry parted his lips and it took Draco only a split second to begin exploring his mouth, and in that moment Harry could feel himself losing complete control. It was like he was a passenger on a runaway train, and Draco was the conductor. All Harry could do was hold on and enjoy the ride.

Draco was the first to pull away after a few minutes, and when Harry finally opened his eyes again he realised he was laying against the arm of the sofa, nearly completely lying down. He had been so into the kiss that he hadn’t even noticed when Draco gently pushed him down.

The two men sat up and tried to catch their breaths, both red-faced and looking equally disheveled. Draco however, managed to recover before Harry and began sipping on his tea again, cheeks still tinged pink in a blush.

“Er...” Harry finally said. “What would you grade that?”

Draco chuckled past his tea. “A+.”

“But you did most of the work,” Harry pointed out.

“Precisely,” Draco nodded, giving Harry a teasing look.

They both laughed at that and Harry finally grabbed is own teacup, taking a sip to calm his nerves. Two kisses in one night! How bloody lucky am I?

“You know,” Harry said softly, setting his cup down and looking to Draco. “Things between us have been moving so fast and slow at the same time, and yet... I don’t even know your last name.”

Draco visibly stiffened and Harry couldn’t help but wonder if he said something wrong. After a moment though, the man relaxed and leaned back into the sofa, his stormy grey eyes meeting Harry’s green ones.

“Malfoy,” he said. “It’s Draco Malfoy.”

Harry froze, his eyebrows furrowing at the name.

“That name... actually sounds familiar. Malfoy...”

“Um,” Draco said, a slightly panicked look gracing his face as he straightened up, making Harry begin to worry. “Well, there’s actually a reason for that. You see, I was meaning to tell you before, really. My work is-”

Draco was interrupted by the ringing of a phone. The blond huffed and pulled it out of his pocket, then hung up on whoever was calling with a scowl. He looked to Harry, an unreadable expression written across his face. He opened his mouth to speak and right as he did so the phone began to ring once again, causing the man to groan loudly.

“Er,” Harry tried, raising an eyebrow. “Everything alright?”

“Yes, yes,” Draco sighed and hung up on the caller again. He then turned it off and threw it onto the table. “That’s just my mother calling to pester me.”

“Oh! Well then maybe you should answer.”

“She can wait until tomorrow,” Draco snorted. “Parent problems, you know.”

Harry shrugged and looked away. “Not really. My parents died when I was a baby, so I never got the chance to really have problems with them.”

“Oh,” Draco said, his voice sympathetic. “I’m sorry. How did they...”

“A car crash,” Harry answered. “They died and I lived. I also got this bad boy as a souvenir.” He brushed back his fringe to show Draco his scarred forehead.

Draco said nothing, but his sharp eyebrows furrowed with concern. He reached a hand out and began tracing the scar lines with his fingers, the touch gentle and warm on Harry’s skin.

“I’m sorry,” Draco repeated softly and pulled away.

“It’s okay,” Harry said. “It was a long time ago, and I don’t even remember it.”

“But that doesn’t make it any less painful,” Draco pointed out, and the man placed his hand on top of Harry’s, causing him to blush. His heart leaped in his chest at the touch, and after a moment their fingers intertwined with each other.

It’s a perfect fit, Harry thought to himself. How cliché.

“This is good, though,” Draco said, the corner of his lip turning up in the hint of a small smile. “We’re getting to know each other better.”

Harry nodded and returned the smile, looking deep into Draco’s eyes.

“Yeah, we are.”

“So, Potter,” Draco said, leaning forward until their shoulders brushed and Harry could smell his expensive cologne.

“Harry. Call me Harry, Draco.”

“So... Harry,” Draco smirked, a playful expression written across his beautiful face. “Tell me all about yourself.”

-

I am SO sorry for the long wait. I had to finish finals, but luckily I’m done and I can finally get back to regularly updating Love, France. Here’s a little make-out session to quench your thirst. Part 23 will be up tomorrow or the day after.

To see any new updates on Love, France, please check HERE daily!

[333kaylynn]

27 Roses / e.d.

Y/n goes to a mental hospital and Ethan visits her every day until he stops for 27 days. “27 roses for every day I missed.”

Request: nahhh fam

Word Count: 2609

uhhh i apologize for continously going from 1st and 2nd person point of view. 

I’m tagging a few people, sorry if you didn’t wanna be tagged!

@bouttogolinkurbitch

@dimply-dolan

@dolayn

@grayson-dolans-dangly-earring

@kara-dolan

@nomoregraydays

@bb-dolan

@olivia-m-dolan

@olderdolan

@justanotherdolanblog

@profanitydolan

okay im done tagging, please enjoy this bc its not the best but i meannnn

///

Day One was possibly the worst. I didn’t know anyone, nor did anyone know me. I didn’t want to sit through this stupid therapy session we had to do, but of course, I was forced. They allowed me to bring someone for the first group therapy, so I wasn’t uncomfortable. Ethan stayed with me throughout the whole thing. 

Everyone in my part of the hospital was between the ages 13-17. One girl was there for trying to commit suicide, I found out her name was Amber, and she’s 14. Elisia, 16, had gone for anger management issues. Tyler, same age as me, was there for drug use. 

To be honest, I didn’t think I belonged here. I mean, in the back of my mind, I knew knew I did, but I just felt out of the loop at the moment. Everyone already knew eachother, and I just got there. 

Ethan had to leave after therapy, and it hurt me to see him go. “I promise I’ll visit you everyday. Only 365 days.” Ethan assured you you would be okay. 

“I’m gonna miss you E.” I say, pulling him in for a hug and a kiss. 

“Okay, visiting hours are over. All friends and family must leave.” The announcement went through the speakers, and I walked Ethan to the door. 

Day Two was slightly better, I started talking to a few people, Olivia, Tyler, and Faith. Olivia and Tyler were both 17, and Faith was 16. 

Tyler had been in here for about a year before this, Olivia about 7 months, and Faith for only about 2 months before I had come. 

All we really did today was sit around and get to know eachother. We played random card games, ate, and just sat around mainly. 

Ethan came and visited again, during visiting hours. Just like he said he would.  It brought joy to my eyes too see him. 

3 to 5 o clock, every day. Those were visiting hours. 3 pm to 5 pm. 

“Hey babe. I’m here, just like I said I would be.” Ethan came through the glass doors that led to the main room of the facility. He stood in the same spot for a minute and looked around until he saw you at a table with Tyler, Faith, and Olivia. 

You stood up from the table and pulled him in for a hug. You ran your small, yet nimble fingers through his ruffled up hair, probably caused by Grayson. 

“How’s your mom doing?” You ask, pushing him off of you but still holding onto him. Ethan laughed and looked at you, answering softly, “You just saw her yesterday, y/n. Right before we came here.”

“I know, E. But hey, I have to ask how my second mom is doing. You know I do.” 

Your fingers went up and through his hair again. He smiled again and said, “I know, I know. She’s doing great. She said she might visit you on Sunday, because that’s her only day off from work. My dad might come too, and Cameron.” 

You smiled and thought of the entire Dolan family seeing you here, which brought your face to a frown. 

You didn’t want to seem weak around them. You knew they already knew you were here, but they didn’t see you here yet. It was scary, the thought of them seeing you like this. 

Maybe they’d think you weren’t good enough for Ethan. They’d make Ethan stop seeing you. You couldn’t stand the thought of that. You shook your head and looked back up at Ethan. 

He could tell something was off about you for that minute. Your troubled past caused you to space out from time to time, and it probably wasn’t going to stop anytime soon. 

“You okay?” Ethan asks, resting his hand on your shoulder and rubbing it for a minute before bringing it back down. 

“Yeah, yeah. I’m okay.” You say, smiling at him and sitting back down at the table, “These are my new friends. Ethan, Tyler. Tyler, Ethan. Olivia, Ethan. Ethan, Olivia. Faith, Ethan. Ethan, Faith.” 

You took your time introducing everyone and after your introduction, Ethan immediately went into a conversation, like the social butterfly he is. 

Tyler and Ethan had a pretty intense conversation about Tyler’s life. Ethan wanted to know more about why people choose to do drugs. In his mind, there are so many things you can do to make yourself happy besides drugs. But in Tyler’s, it’s the only thing that made him happy. 

You, Faith, and Olivia were doing an even intenser range of things. Playing a game of Skip-Bo. It happened to be your favorite game since you were about 7, your grandma being the one to start your love for the game. 

Now, at the age of 17, your love still hasn’t stopped. 

“Hey, babe, I only have 30 minutes left.” Ethan says, scooting closer to your and whispering the words in your ear as you lie down a number 2 card. 

“Do you and Tyler want to join our game?” You ask, already starting to hand the two of the boys' cards. 

Day 29. It’s almost been your first month since you’ve started here. Ethan still came every day, just as he promised. 

It was now 8 pm, meaning you had 2 hours before lights out. Everyone from ages 13-15 were required to go to sleep by nine, and everyone ages 16 and 17 were allowed to stay awake until 10 if they wanted to. 

Every Thursday they put on “movie night” where the kids got to vote on a movie and watch it together with popcorn and blankets. The movie had to be Pg 13, due to the fact some of the kids could get triggered by certain things showed on R rated movies. 

You couldn't begin to imagine the things that could cause an outburst in this place. In the past 24 hours, we've had three emotional outbursts.

"Michael, sweetie. Calm down." Mrs. DeGram said as Ms. Weiss held him down due to his frustration.

Michael's mom hadn't shown up to visiting hours, but Michael was determined she'd show up.

"No! My mom will be here, she's just running late!" Michael screamed, pushing away from Ms. Weiss. Ms. Weiss got ahold of him again and held him down gently in order to calm him down.

"Michael, you need some food and some rest. Come with me." Mrs. DeGram says, holding Michael's hand as she pulls him down the small hallway that led to the dining area, where a few of the kids were seated.

Michael's mom came today, she sat and explained to him that his younger sister, Gabriella, was feeling sick last night so they brought her to see a doctor.

Faith also had a panic attack. Her father, whom she hadn't seen in ages, decided last night would be the perfect time to see her.

Faith had to be pulled away from the tall brown headed man that sat ahead of her after she screamed and clawed at him as she called him a "dirty cheating bastard"

Olivia held her closely as she shook from under her arm, whispering things to her to calm her down as her father was kicked off of the premises.

Gabe, the newest member of the facility, was having major drug withdrawals. Him and Tyler began talking about what made them start doing drugs, which seemed to have calmed Gabe down a bit.

Gabe and Tyler began laughing about their first time trying ecstasy, as me, Olivia, and Faith were playing yet another game of skip-bo.

Day 121, about 4 months in. Ethan still came to visit everyday. Seeing his tall body walk through the big glass doors, opening his arms for the hug you greeted him with every day. 

“Y/n, baby. I’ve missed you.” Ethan states as he pulls you back in for a hug, his grip beginning to get tighter. 

“Dude, I was actually just so happy when I did it. I just wanted to do everything I’ve ever wanted right then and there.” Tyler began telling Gabe, the two of them still talking about ecstasy. 

“Are they talking about drugs?” Ethan says, looking at the two of them and back at you. 

You smiled at him and gripped onto his arms, nodding your head, “Yeah, ecstasy I think.” 

Ethan just nods and the two of you take a seat, joining in on the conversation Faith and Olivia were having. Faith was laughing at some joke Ethan had made, while you and Olivia were talking more about family life and other random things. 

Olivia’s mom passed from cancer a few years back, that’s what initially started her depression. Her dad took a tough road when it happened as well, but the two of them stuck together through it all. He visits her every Monday, Tuesday, Friday, and Sunday. The other days he has to work late. 

You turned to Ethan and laughed at some joke he made once again, causing him to grin and pull you in for another hug. You continued to laugh as you thought more about it. The joke wasn’t that funny, it was just some dad joke he probably saw on a popsicle stick before coming here. 

The next hour went by pretty quick, meaning Ethan would have to leave in the next few minutes. 

“I’ll see you tomorrow, right?” You ask, hugging Ethan again and kissing him before he had to go. 

“Of course you will y/n. I wouldn’t forget.” Ethan says, holding you closely as your head rested on his shoulder. 

The next few months were basically the same, a few of the kids getting out and a few being transferred to the adult facility due to birthdays and being officially 18. 

It was now March 17th. Meaning I had about 3 more months before I was officially out of this place. They told me I would have to stay in the adult facility for a few days because I joined only 5 days after my 17th birthday, so I would turn 18 before they could legally let me out. 

Eventually, 3 o clock rolled around. I sat at the normal table I did while I waited for Ethan to show up. 

4 pm and he still wasn’t here. Maybe he had something come up. You didn’t want to worry too much, but in the back of your head you were extremely scared. 

“y/n, sweetie. He’ll be here tomorrow, just ignore it okay? I’m sure everything is fine.” Olivia said, pulling me in for a hug. Faith joined in soon after, which eventually led to a group hug with Me, Olivia, Faith, Gabe, and Tyler. The four of them all knew how much Ethan meant to me and how worried I was when he hadn’t shown up for today's visit. 

Soon enough, the next day rolled around. 

Ethan wasn’t here for this visiting either. My mind seemed to be a jumbled up mess at the time, my anxiety kicking in. 

Ethan had to show up, I know he did. He wouldn’t be late unless something bad happened. It wasn’t like him to do that. 

The next 2 weeks went by slowly, each day getting more painful. Ethan still hadn’t been there. You did everything in your power to ignore it but as the days went on you seemed to have just gotten more worried and more hurt. 

27 days later. Ethan hadn’t been there. You went over to the nurses office, where you asked Ms. Weiss if you could talk to her for a minute. 

“Of course y/n. What do you need dear?” Ms. Weiss said, allowing you to come into her office. You smile at her politeness and take a seat before asking, “Can you take Ethan Dolan’s name off of the visiting list?” 

She simply gives you a “is everything alright” look and then nods before going onto her computer to delete his name from the visiting list. “Would you like to continue receiving letters from him?” 

You nod and say that it’s okay if she kept that, maybe he would be able to explain himself. 

As you leave Ms. Weiss room, Faith runs up to you and pulls you over to where Olivia and Tyler were sitting, Tyler yelling at Olivia for an unknown reason. 

“Faith, what’s going on?” You ask, whisper-yelling into her ear. She shrugs and responds with, “I think something Olivia said upset Tyler. I don’t know what! Please help.” 

You nod at Faith and pull her in for a hug before telling her to go get one of the nurses to separate the two. 

The nurse comes back and pulls the two away from eachother and brings Tyler over to another area where Gabe was seated. You and Olivia talked about what happened and Faith sat in silence for the rest of the day, probably shaken up by two of her closest friends here getting into such a big fight. 

A fight between them wasn’t a very common thing, most of the time everything was nice and dandy. 

1 week later. Ethan had tried to show up his 28th day, you saw him. But the nurse waved him off and after a bit of arguing, he left. 

“y/n. These are for you.” Mrs. DeGram says, handing you a basket filled with roses. You look at it for a minute, confused as to who would send you so many roses. You turn it and see an envelope, which eases your confusion for a minute. 

Y/n, the envelope said very large across the top. It was clearly Ethan’s handwriting. You ripped the envelope open and started reading. 

“Y/n. I just want to begin and say how sorry I am. I skipped the past 27 days because I needed time to think. It hurt me to see you like this and I kept on my tough guy face for you. But I couldn’t do it anymore and I didn’t want you to see me like that. I didn’t want you to worry. And I know you’re angry with me. But please, please put my name back on the list so I can talk to you. I miss you.  -E”

You were still a bit angry, but you couldn’t be mad at him for too long. You walked to Ms. Weiss’ office and asked her to put Ethan’s name back on the list. She nodded and smiled as you left the room to go back to talking to Olivia and Faith. 

Soon enough, the next day rolled around. Ethan came, right at 3 o clock. He lightly smiled at you as he walked towards you, giving you a hug. 

You weeped in his arms. You didn’t expect to be sad when you saw him. You thought you’d be angry. But it wasn’t the case. You hadn’t realized how much you really missed him til now. 

Ethan began to explain himself, and if I’m being honest, it took a lot of time and tears before he could fully get it out. 

“Ethan. Why so many roses? I mean, you could’ve just gotten me one and it would have been okay.” You ask, looking at the plentiful amount of roses that were still seated at the table they had been when you got them. 

“27 roses for every day I missed.” Ethan says, hugging you again and kissing your forehead. You smiled and pulled away. 

“I love you, doofus.” 

Ethan grinned and laughed, “I love you too, y/n. And I’m not going anywhere anytime soon. I’ll be right with you when you’re outta this place.”

[rainteaanddragons]

Smoke & Mirrors: Twenty-Three - Space

Prologue |  Ch 1 | Ch 2 | Ch3 | Ch4 | Ch 5 | Ch 6 | Ch 7 | Ch 8 | Ch 9 | Ch10 | Ch 11 | Ch 12 | Ch 13 | Ch 14 | Ch 15 | Ch 16 | Ch 17 | Ch 18 | Ch 19 | Ch 20 | Ch 21 | Ch 22 | Ch 23 |

Read on ff.net and ao3

"I'd rather fuel a fantasy than deal with this alone. I wanna sleep next to you, but that's all I wanna do right now, so come over now and talk me down."

- Talk Me Down, Troye Sivan

Natsu only made it one level down before he stopped, panting, and sank onto the top step. He loved me? No, he loves me… He wasn't sure why Gray's question had scared him as much as it did. Just as much, Natsu knew it was stupid to have run. "I don't love him though. Not like that. Do I?" In truth, Natsu hadn't really felt that sort of love before, so on his logic, how would he know? Yet, Natsu knew that when Gray had disappeared, he'd definitely felt more worried than he'd expected, but he'd just passed that off a pride. How had they managed to grab Gray from under his nose? It was then that his memories of that day surfaced and he couldn't help but clench both his fists.

"Dammit!" Natsu yelled. He lashed out in anger, kicking the embers of the dying fire which sparked dangerously. "Where is he? Where is he!" Natsu cried out, "whoever has taken him, I'm gonna find them, and they're gonna pay!"

Remembering that anger he had felt, Natsu wondered whether maybe, just maybe, it had its roots somewhere quite different to what he'd originally thought. But it's Gray. Gray! Childhood friend. Sparring partner. Partner in crime. Nothing more…right? That was it, it had to be. Through his muddle of confused thoughts Natsu realised the reason he'd been so angry when Gray had been taken. It hadn't just been the pride he'd pushed it off as at first, the tell-tale tightening in his chest he felt told him otherwise.

Maybe I did love him too?

Natsu shook his head. Not like that, I couldn't, not Gray, but the more he kept telling himself that, the less he really believed it. He wasn't sure if his denial was the fact that he didn't want to lose what he did have with Gray already, or if it was quite possible he was still holding onto the Gray before the memory loss. Or maybe it was both? Either way, he knew it was stupid. I've never had these sorts of worries before, yet, he reasoned with himself, I've never needed to. After he'd sat there quiet a while longer, Natsu came to an uncertain conclusion. Gray's question had stirred something in him. What though, he wasn't quite sure. As he sat there he couldn't help but wonder what if it had been anyone else in their situation. Would he then feel differently?He was so lost in his thoughts that he didn't hear the clatter of the lift as it went up past the stairwell, not even reacting to the echo of Erza and Lyon's voices as they passed the entrance to the stairs. Natsu wasn't sure how long he'd been sitting there before he registered Wendy's voice calling out his name.

"Wendy?"

"Oh! Thank goodness!" Wendy sank onto the stairs next to Natsu. "I'm glad you only got this far…"

Natsu didn't respond.

"Why did you run?"

"I didn't-" Natsu shook his head. "I panicked."

"Yes, I can see that, Natsu, but why?"

Natsu wasn't sure where to begin.

"Did you love Him? …because I think He must have loved you."

"What do you think?" Natsu looked up, "Wendy?"

"Honestly, Natsu, I think you need to work that out yourself. You're the one who remembers everything, you're the one who knows everything about your relationship with Gray. Everything from when you first met him to when you so recently stopped him from using Iced Shell on Zeref, and everything that's going on now. Only you can know whether you did all that just because he's your friend, or because of something more."

"Tough example." Natsu chuckled darkly. He remembered that day all too well.

"Stop it! That magic, I've stopped you from using it once already! Hey, Gray! We're friends aren't we? So stop thinking about dying! Live!"

The panic, the fear of losing someone else close to him. There was that word again. Close. How had it taken him this long to realise that Gray was so much more than just a friend. Or at least that Gray had felt that way. How long ago had this started? How long had he been so oblivious to his best friend's feelings towards him that he'd ignored his own as well. That was it too though, why now? After everything they had been through, everything that had happened to test their relationship, why had it taken until now for them to talk about it. Even if the term 'talk' could only be used lightly. Gray had asked Natsu a question he'd never even considered, let alone needed to answer until that moment. Why had it taken Gray not really feeling like himself for the subject to come up?

Fresh gaze, perhaps?

The thought circled his mind for a little while longer before he spoke again. "I do…I do care about him. A lot." Natsu paused. "Is it what he thinks it is though?"

"Natsu," Wendy sighed, "Gray doesn't think it, as you call it, is anything." She frowned. "No, that came out wrong…Gray isn't sure what to make of his own feelings towards you let alone yours."

"Oh."

"You two are going to have to work that out yourselves."

Natsu gave a slow nod of his head. "When did you get so wise?"

"I always have been." Wendy grinned. "I just wait my turn to show it."

Natsu let out a bark of laughter and ruffled Wendy's hair. He was only a little closer to puzzling out an answer, but he now knew for sure he felt something more than what he'd always thought.

- o - o - o -

Natsu rolled over in his sleep, he was neither deep in sleep or fully awake, but for now he was resting comfortably. Gray's small apartment had no spare room so he'd taken the surprisingly cosy couch in the split lounge room and kitchenette. Happy had curled himself on the discarded cushioning from the back of the lounge. At least one of us is sleeping soundly, Natsu thought with a sigh as he rolled over again. It was then he jumped awake as the sound of a pained yell reached his ears. Gray? Natsu sat up, part of him had known this would happen. It was Gray's first night out of the guild's infirmary, of course the somewhat new environment would bring up something like this. Even if Gray was home, there was no escaping his memories.

It wasn't for the first time though, that as Natsu sat there, he was at a loss of what to do. Part of him wanted to go to him, to comfort him, but that felt like he was crossing a boundary which he himself had set up, albeit somewhat accidentally. Since Natsu had run from Gray's studio, and with his continued confusion over his own feelings, it wasn't surprising they had barely spoken beyond necessary interactions since. Natsu stood, streched, and walked lightly towards Gray's room. It felt almost invasive as he lifted his hand to knock, would he even want me there? As another, but much quieter, yell reached his ears, Natsu knocked.

"Gray?" Natsu called gently, but there was no response. He repeated the action. "Gray? Are you alright?" He clenched his fist, stupid question, of course he isn't alright.

"…'m fine."

Natsu could hear the defiance in the muffled, sleepy voice of his friend. "Y- you sure?"

"…'m fine! …back to sleep."

"Okay." Natsu responded slowly, but he didn't move from his spot in front of the door. His forehead resting softly against it. Instead he sank to the floor to sit against the wall outside Gray's room. It wasn't long before Natsu's eyes closed again, and he drifted into a restless sleep.

"You woke up on the couch?" Lucy gaped at Natsu as he recounted the events of the night before as they sat down for dinner that evening at the guild hall. "Are you sure you didn't dream going to see him?"

Natsu raised an eyebrow. "You'd think I know when Gray's voice is real or not by now."

Lucy shrugged defeat. "You could ask him you know?"

Natsu gave her a look which clearly said well that's impossible, right?

"How'd he even get you back to the couch anyway?"

"You're not that light…" Happy added with a sly grin.

"Shut it. Gray couldn't have carried me, unless he is stronger than we think he is right now."

"He has been doing quite a bit of training…" Wendy chimed in, "as much as possible without hurting himself anyway. It wasn't you Happy?"

"Nope. I was sound asleep."

"I think he could have done it…well, he would have tried to get you back to the couch and if it didn't work he would have tried even harder." Erza said. "No matter what happens to Gray, it won't change the fact of his stubbornness."

Natsu chuckled. "You've got that right." There was something though which concerned Natsu though, why didn't I wake up? It was a possibility that he was just too tired to notice, he did usually sleep quite heavily anyway. Natsu decided to forget about it. There was something about that small action of Gray getting him back to the couch before he left for his training with Lyon which tugged strangely at his stomach. He was sure it was because of recent revelations, those which still left him in a bit of a puzzle.

"When is Gray getting back anyway?" Erza sidled onto the bench next to Lucy.

"Who knows." Natsu crashed his forehead to the table.

"You alright?" Lucy asked.

"How could I be?" Natsu mumbled. "After what Gray said, I don't know what to think…"

"Honestly Natsu," Erza glanced over at her friend with fond amusement, "The fact that you are thinking about this at all shows just how much you care"

"Huh?"

"I remember a young boy telling me once that you didn't need to think because you were all instinct." Erza chuckled, "What does your instinct tell you to do?"

Natsu frowned for a moment before his lips split into a wide grin and he started to laugh. "My instinct, as you call it, is giving me nothing. Gray is someone I couldn't never quite figure out." Natsu thudded his head on the table.

"Who can't you quite figure out?"

Natsu sat bolt up right at the sound of Gray's voice. He felt a jolt deep in his chest, though he couldn't quite place its cause.

"No one!" Natsu answered far too quickly.

Gray frowned. "Suit yourself." He then turned to his right. "You want to eat here too Lyon?"

The older mage shrugged. "If you are." Lyon then grinned, "My shout. You did well today. Plus you are a little on the broke side!"

"Not for long though," Natsu grinned, "I've gone on quite a few jobs so we're good for now."

"We?"

"I am living with you aren't I?"

"Oh. You make a point there Pinky!"

Natsu blinked, staring up at Gray like he'd he'd just heard the best news possible. The nickname playing over in his head.

Lucy nudged Erza, the latter of whom nodded, a small smile lighting up her face.

Lyon strode past the pair up to the bar, "What's on tonight Mira?"

Mira grinned, "Aside from that precious moment playing out over there?" She jerked her head towards where Natsu still sat mouth agape. "Whatever you fancy."

- o - o - o -

For the next few days the guild developed a routine around Gray's training. Gray would leave early in the morning with Lyon, ad then train all day before returning to the guild for dinner. Gray'd then walk back to his apartment with Natsu and Happy. For Gray, exhaustion rarely left him chatty, so Natsu filled the silence talking about both the jobs he'd been taking lately, as well as those he had taken with Gray when they were younger. Though Lyon never train Gray too much to injure him, Natsu could tell that Gray wasn't quite the same still, and he knew it would be a while before he would be. In the evening the pair would chat a bit before going their separate ways to bed. Natsu would always get up to the sound of Gray's screams, sit outside the room until he fell asleep, but wake up the next day back on the couch. Every night was the same too, well, almost.

On the fourth night Natsu was siting in the kitchen when the sound of Gray's panicked voice made his heart jolt. He stumbled up, his chair crashing onto the kitchen tiles in his hurry to get to Gray. Still standing on the other side of the closed bathroom door, Natsu hesitated. "What is it?" He called.

"You can come in. Please." Gray then whispered in a pained whisper.

Natsu pushed open the door, trying not to look too taken aback by the scene before him. Gray was in the bath, his left hand clutched the ceramic edge of the basin. Water seeped over the tiles, soaking the bath mat and Gray's discarded clothes. It was Gray's expression though which was hard to pick. There was something close to defeat in his ark eyes which Natsu seen very few times before. He couldn't help but stare though at the state of Gray's. Usually quite toned form. What first caught his eye was just how skinny Gray still was, as he was always wearing a shirt over his bandages, it was hard to tell, but now Natsu could still see the divots of Gray's ribs. The skin there marred by large blotched bruises, and a myriad of scratches. His usually muscular arms didn't seem to have the same depth, his now quite thin legs quite the same. It was the massive, still healing scar which ran the length from Gray's left collar bone, through his guild mark before fading into the side of his chest which Natsu hadn't expected to see. As it was the first time he'd seen Gray shirtless since before he'd disappeared, Natsu had imagined much worse, seeing it all though, that was something else entirely. He felt guilt tug at his stomach, especially as Gray's expression changed from defeat, to embarrassment.

"Help me, please…" Gray looked away, "I can't seem to stand up, must have trained to hard today." He indicated to his legs and each arm. "Nothing will work." As if to prove his point Gray tried to stand but only caused another wave of bath water to wash over the side.

It didn't take much for Natsu to notice the frustration. Instead of drawing attention to it, Natsu smiled tentatively. "You must be right. I'll be having a word to Lyon about this!"

Gray chuckled. All tension from the room gone. "It's my fault. As you probably know, I am rather stubborn."

Natsu snorted. "You can say that again."

Gray smiled back. The moment Natsu had stepped into the room, he'd felt noticeably calmer. Gray didn't want that to change at all.

"Lets get you out of here." Natsu glanced around for a towel. Taking it in his hands, he stepped forward onto the soaked bath mat. Natsu paused for a moment, at a loss as to how to even go about this. "Uhh, Gray, just try to stand if possible, I'll do the work, but it will be easier for both of us like that." He waited for Gray's nod of approval before placing his arms around Grays chest and lifting. It took a few tries, but eventually Gray was standing with a towel around himself still leaning heavily on Natsu.

"Thank you." Gray still didn't let go.

Without questioning it Natsu guided Gray back to his bedroom before helping him into his pyjamas, and eventually to bed. Natsu stood for a moment by Gray's bed, not quite sure what to do. He was turning to go when Gray's quiet voice reached his ears.

"I'm sorry, Natsu. Sorry you had to see that."

Natsu felt as his throat clenched. "Gray don't," somewhere in his gut, something stirred, "You have nothing to apologise for. Nothing at all. Please, just sleep well." Gray didn't respond, but Natsu could see his friend's shoulders shaking with silent sobs.

Later that night, Natsu was woken by the sound of Gray's screams. He padded down the hall to the door of Gray's bedroom. "Gray?" It was a few moments before Gray responded, but it sounded broken, and painfully hoarse.

"You can come in. Please."

This time Natsu didn't hesitate. He closed the door gently behind him before walking slowly to the bed. Settling himself on the floor near to where he knew Gray to be lying, Natsu leant against the side of the bed, legs street out before him. He sat there in silence, resting his head against the mattress as Gray's breathing calmed again. Natsu wasn't sure how long he'd been sitting there before he felt a hand in his hair and his back stiffened slightly. Moments later, he relaxed again, closing his eyes to Gray's gentle touch. It was quite a while before either of them spoke.

"Natsu." Gray whispered, his voice sounding louder than it actually was. His hand still resting gently in Natsu's hair. "Please, don't, uhh, freak out, or anything, but…"

"What is it?"

"I just, I need to feel that you are here. I keep waking up back in the cell. I know you're here, but I can't quite believe it." Gray's breath caught in his throat. "Could you, just…lie next to me? It would be more comfortable for you too. More comfortable than the floor anyway. I'm sorry I- I don't want it to be weird I-"

Natsu could feel his heart beating in his chest. There was nothing wrong with what Gray was asking. They'd shared a bed plenty of times before, he'd begun to wonder whether Erza had booked rooms like that on purpose. Now though, there was something about the request which sat differently with him. It was clouded with emotions Natsu couldn't quite understand, though he knew he was reading into it for more than he wanted, or even needed.

"Don't worry. It's fine." Natsu pulled himself up to lie on the bed and taken up the space Gray had just vacated.

"Do you sleep on your side?"

"Mostly."

"Can I lean my back against yours? Just so I know you're still there."

Natsu nodded. Then when he remembered it was dark he answered a mumbled yeah before guiding Gray to shuffle closer so his back rested against Natsu's.

That night Natsu realised something which he guessed quite a few had known much earlier. Gray was't just a friend to him anymore, it was Gray. It terrified him, but as he drifted closer towards sleep the knot in his stomachs loosened slightly and his chest felt that little bit warmer.

Gray though, he slept the rest of the night through without disruption. The comfort Natsu brought was better at keeping the nightmares away than any sleeping draft he'd been given since getting back home.

[hopelesscobwebs]

92 Asks Game!

I’m finally doing this. I thought it would be fun and i’m bored af so here we go:

Tagged by: @just-a-crazy-nerd love you <3

LAST

1) Drink: Water (gotta stay hydrated y’all)

2) Phone call: My Dad.

3) Text message: “My legs are dead. All I wanna do is sleep but I have to do music homework” to my friend like a week ago (I don’t text much lmao).

4) Song listened to: Sumertime, By My Chemical Romance

5) Time you cried: Maybe 2 days ago? (I was really sad over MCR), but the last time I really, like really cried was maybe last week.

HAVE YOU EVER

6) Dated somebody twice: ahaha twice? You’re so funny. I haven’t dated someone once...

7) Been cheated on: My cat once slept on my sisters bed instead of mine so that counts.

8) Kissed someone and regretted it: What don’t you get about FOREVER ALONE HERE.

9) Lost someone special: Perhaps, It kinda depends really what you count as “lost”. But yeah, unfortunately.

10) Been depressed: I have been in dark mindsets a lot lately.

11) Gotten drunk and puked: Never been drunk before (I am so cool like that)

THREE FAVOURITE COLOURS

12) Probably Blue, But to narrow it down: Teal

13) Rich purple

14) Probably black

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU

15) Made new friends: Tons (ilysm guys)

16) Fallen out of love: no (kinda yes... but William doesn’t count)

17) Laughed until you cried: Yes, Yesterday (we were bottle flipping and then someone made a seal noise, don’t even get me started)

18) Found out someone was gossiping about you: Hopefully not, there’s not much to gossip about when it comes to me.

19) Met someone who changed your life: If Discovering MCR counts... then yes.

20) Found out who your true friends are: *Ahem*... yes...

21) Kissed someone on your Facebook list: Haha this list of asks is so funny. what don’t you get about NOT BEEN KISSED EVER... *cries*

HOW MANY/MUCH

22) Facebook friends: like almost 400? idek. (I know them all in person btw, i’m not one of those weirdos that just friends anybody). I barely use FB tbh

23) Pets: oh boy.... I have 6 cats guys... thats right, you can call me the crazy cat lady.

24) Want to change your name: My last name yes. Quick, somebody marry me

WHAT

25) Did I get for my birthday: A Spongebob birthday cake, a Vampire Diaries pillow, depression  um what... I got to eat all my fave foods in one day, that was pretty special even though i threw up at the end of it

26) Time I woke up: like 9:30?

27) Were you doing at midnight: Watching Frerard video edits...

28) Can’t you wait for: FOR ME TO ORDER MCR MERCH AS A TRIBUTE ON MARCH 22 *cries and dies*

29) Was the last time you saw your mom: like 4 hours ago.

30) Was something you wish you could change about your life: I sometimes wish I was born 10 years earlier but then I remember... there’d be no quality memes for a long time...

31) Are you listening to right now: MCR, what else honestly...

32) Gets on your nerves: When people make up those shitty things like “ UR NOT A TRUE FAN UNLESS YOU HAVE THIS OR DO THIS BLAH BLAH” like stfu, I am a fan in my own way. Racists, Homophobes, just basically anyone who thinks they have the right to tell you not to be yourself, like seriously, fuck off.

33) Talked to a person named Tom: My cat is called Tom, so that counts.

34) Is your most visited website: Tumblr, no doubt (or YouTube or guitar tabs, or Putlocker lets be honest)

35) Elementary school/primary school: I can’t even remember tbh and I ain’t tellin you

36) High School: The one I’m at now. Ha, got ya

37) College: n o , I am too young, gosh

38) Hair colour: Brown/ Blonde (streaks, naturally from sun lmao)

39) Long/short hair: I just cut it all off this year. Think 1920′s hair and that’s me.

40) Crush: There’s a cute guy in my chem class but that’s about it #foreveralone

41) Do you like about yourself: My final wakeup call of music interests. I used to be so shallow in that department. Um.... I guess I like the fact that I get on better with older people (I skipped a year at school so all my classmates are a year older anyways) idek. There’s not really much to like.

42) Piercings: 1 on each ear (i’m thinking of getting a second set) But I barely wear earrings tbh

43) Blood type: Idk, it would be cool to know tho

44) Nickname: Some of my friends call me Em but barely. Emy / Emz by family (if any of you call me that, it’ll be weird lmao) PLEASE START A TREND...CALL ME EM

45) Relationship status: single as a pringle and not ready to mingle please i have anxiety *daydreams about meeting perfect boy*

46) Zodiac: Scorpio yeah boi

47) Pronouns: she/her

48) Favourite show: Supernatural, Miraculous Ladybug (don’t call me a kid for watching it I swear I’ll end u ahaha), Rick and Morty, The Vampire Diaries... I could go on for days

49) Tattoos: I always think they’re a cool concept but i’d probably chicken out at the last minute, so no

50) Left or right handed: right

FIRST

51) Surgery: I got a tooth removed quite a few years back, I went under genral anaesthetic and everything.

52) Piercings: Ears

53) Best friend: Gabby, We don’t talk anymore sadly but I still love her <3

54) Sport: Ummm well i’ve always loved badminton but i’ve never taken a serious sport class before lmao

55) Vacation: I’m pretty sure it was to Melbourne, Australia, We saw some really cool outdoor art and went to see Wicked at some theater, that’s all I remember.

56) Pair of shoes: Say wat?

RIGHT NOW

57) Eating: I wish I was eating

58) Drinking: the dead souls of my enemies wait what

59) I am about to: Rearrange my sitting position and continue to write this long ass ask thing.

60) Listening to: The End, My Chemical Romance

61) Waiting for: My sis to get home so I can use her credit card to buy MCR merch, no really, this is the truth. I n e e ed it

62) Want to see: MCR get back together in 2019 for at least a reunion song or SOMETHING PLEASE. Also, a Panic! concert because I missed the last one in my country. ALSO a Supernatural Convention

63) Want to get married: Well it would be nice, gotta find a guy first, there’s the hard part

64) Career: I never know... I like to think that my dream is to be in a band but that aint ever gonna happen. I really wanna do something that can help people idek.

WHICH IS BETTER

65) Hugs/kisses: Well i’ve never kissed anyone and I lOvE HuGs, THEY ARE JUST SO NICE, LIKE AHHH GIMME UR LOVE, GIMME HUUUGGSSS. If I ever meet any of you in person, I’ll be really shy, but know deep down that all I wanna do is HUG YOU SNDKJGSND.

66) Lips/eyes: Eyes hold secrets, I love them

67) Taller/shorter: gimme da toll peeps, But I love the smol beans too

68) Younger/older: It depends

69) Romantic/spontaneous: probably spontaneous just to keep me on my toes.

70) Nice arms/nice stomach: um wat? idek i dont pay attention to that

71) Sensitive/loud: Sensitive

72) Hookup/relationship: Relationship definitely 

73) Troublemaker/hesitant: Hesitant alien

HAVE YOU EVER

74) Kissed a stranger: W h A t  D o N t   Y o U   g E t   A b O u T  i T... I AINT KISSED NOBODY BEFORE. gosh, way to rub it in *cries*

75) Drank hard liquor: well. i’ve tried some heavy stuff before but it was a sip and I spat it out coz it literally tasted like p o i s o n. Alcohol is so gross

76) Lost glasses/contact lenses: Don’t need glasses

77) Turned someone down: ??? There hasn’t been anyone to turn down god damnit

78) Canoodling on a first date: They gotta earn that, so no

79) Broken someone’s heart: I sure as hell hope not.

80) Had your own heart broken: mcr breaks my heart E V E R Y GOD DAMN DAY

81) Been arrested: no, I am a good gal

82) Cried when someone died: yes, my grandmother

83) Fallen for a friend: Oh boy, yesyesyes

DO YOU BELIEVE IN

84) Yourself: Not really, but I want to.

85) Miracles: I wish for them but I don’t really think they occur

86) Santa Claus: No, I actually never believed in him when I think about it

87) Kisses on a first date: YAS when it’s been all perfect and he walks ya up to your door ABJISLBHDLBHLA

88) Angels: um... Castiel???

89) Love at first sight: Yes but not like first sight, more like first discussion, when you can instantly click with someone in that first moment idk.

OTHER

90) Best friend’s name: Can I just list all my tumblr friends names? Because YOU GUYS ARE ACTUALLY ALL MY FAVES, YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU <3

91) Eye color: Grey Blue

92) Favourite movie: idek there are so many but: The Abduction Club, is one of my faves, Singin’ in the Rain, Sing Street, and that’s all that’s coming to mind atm.

I tag: (all my BEAUTIFUL AMAZING tumblr frens I mentioned before) @omg-i-cannot-even @shipsareamazing123 @mychemicalchinchilla @potterlock5ever @immacrazyfangirl @trashholeofshittybandstuff @shadowgirl077 @that-awkward-fangirl @lizbeth-loves-bobear @anyone i forgot and anyone who wants to do it! go ahead! <3