#i actually think their Best dynamic was s2 but s2 is also the best season so rly;; it is to be expected

[llumimoon]

Introducing the Erased AU!!! or as I like to call it: The Mysterious Disappearance of Normally Oak

Hehehehe I actually came up w/ this back in May (with the help of @kaseyskat <3) but it's been modified to be more canon compliant since some recent things got the brain gears turning :]c

The premise is essentially Norm and Dood do some. very silly goofs. aka w/out telling anyone Normal decides to go back to the Doodler's home dimension w/ Dood to keep them company and through some magic shenanigans everyone now has no recollection of Normal or the Doodler apocalypse- everything is a picturesque happy ending... or is it?

Sparrow is the first to realize something's up due to her new art studio being where Normal's bedroom used to be, but the others aren't very far behind. They all have to put the clues they discover together in order to figure out what happened and bring Normal back. Speaking of, I dunno how long a human can last in an eldritch dimension after all...

EDIT:

1 2 3 4

[kim-ruzek]

I love and adore season two and I will forever but ugh if it doesn't all annoy me so fucking much !!!

Which honestly doesn't bode well for the rest of my rewatch because it's only going to get worse from here on out and I'm already feeling so annoyed.

[azure-firecracker]

The X-Files Season 1 Review (First-Time Watcher)

(Any fans-please come talk to me about the show and send me asks-I’m obsessed!)

It did not take long for me to realize that this was going to become my newest hyperfixation show. It has everything I love in my shows-a strong focus on its main characters, campy sci-fi monsters mixed with some genuine creepiness, slow burn romance, banter. In short, it’s the perfect show for me. I was basically hooked right away.

Like all first seasons, it was pretty clear that the show was still finding its footing. There were some clunky bits to iron out and the show definitely found its vibe more and more as it went along. I would say it began getting overall more consistent around episode 10 (with individual exceptions before and after that).

In terms of episodes, I enjoyed almost all the episodes of this season even though I would only call a couple stellar. Most episodes were fun or at least had fun moments, and the banter between Mulder and Scully (what’s their ship name?) is enough to keep me going through even the clunkiest and cringiest plots.

Speaking of Mulder and Scully, it’s rare that a show can make me love two characters so equally but I really do. Although Scully is much more in line with my usual favorite characters (she is my special girl and I will do anything for her), I also have a special place in my heart for Mulder’s neurodivergent traumatized puppy energy. Of course they really go together so it’s natural that I love them both.

The only weighty criticism I have for this season is that I feel Mulder gets more spotlight moments than Scully. Not egregiously, but it feels like he’s usually the one in the final fight, seeing the aliens, figuring it out, etc. I do know that they were trying to break gender roles by making Scully the skeptic, but given that the aliens are so real…here at least she often came off as oblivious and she sometimes felt like she was tagging along on Mulder’s quests. Which SUCKS! Because I LOVE HER and she could be SO USEFUL if the writers LET HER. This is why I really loved the moments where she got to step up. Veteran viewers…want to tell me if this gets better?

That criticism aside, I could watch these two fight monsters for days, and I know the S2-S5/6 stretch is considered the show’s best, so I’m looking forward to that.

Individual episode reviews under the cut.

Pilot: Fantastic introduction! It did a great job establishing the characters and their dynamic pretty seamlessly, as well as introducing the alien lore in a way that we could digest. It wasn’t perfect and the story was a bit clunky at times, but it got me hooked and did its job well. I also liked Scully being the audience surrogate here. 8/10

Deep Throat: This episode really solidified the dynamic introduced in the pilot, and is packed with great character moments. It gets a HUGE boost from Scully exchanging the guard to rescue Mulder at the end. I mentioned living for the moments when Scully gets to step up, but I think it was necessary to put this moment so early. Because Scully is new to the X-Files and also clearly wrong about aliens, it was necessary to show us that she had a lot to bring to the table and that Mulder needs her. Also a special shoutout to Seth Green as a stoner. 9.5/10

Squeeze: A very fun monster of the week episode, slightly reminiscent of BtVS. Decently creepy with that 90s horror/sci-fi vibe we all love. Plus lots of great Mulder/Scully moments. (Also, despite my complaints about Scully being underutilized, I enjoyed Mulder saving Scully at the end. Rescuing one another from mortal peril is actually my favorite trope, as long as it’s balanced. In that regard, this season has been). 8/10

Conduit: Honestly this episode was a little slow for me, I felt like the pacing could have been better. I had a hard time staying interested. Also it was hilarious that this was supposed to be Iowa because Iowa does not have mountains like that. It gets a boost from the ending scene which in itself is a 100/10. 6/10

The Jersey Devil: Now this is campier and goofier than suits the show, and I feel like they realized that soon after this. The Mulder/Scully banter still made this a good time, but it wasn’t great. Also not helped by the fact that everything happened during the day (the only time in this show where the lighting was too bright) and the Jersey Devil looked like a normal person with some dust on her. 6/10

Shadows: I found the mystery of this one quite engaging. Back with those 90s horror vibes we love, and it kept me guessing right up until the agents figured it out. Negative points for the lack of Mulder/Scully banter though. 7/10

Ghost in the Machine: Was this cheesy? Yes. Was it objectively good? No. Did I enjoy it anyway? Yes. Who doesn’t love a killer computer? Also Scully crawling out of the vents was badass af. Objectively like a 6/10 but 7/10 for my personal enjoyment.

Ice: Now THIS was the stuff. An objectively great episode of television. The tension, the paranoia, the fallout, seeing what our leads do under that kind of stress…brilliant. (Although my dad the geologist couldn’t help but point out that there is no ice sheet in Alaska). Very tempted to write an alternate version where Mulder actually is infected and Scully has to find a cure before the others kill him. That would’ve been interesting. Anyway 10/10

Space: Apparently people don’t like this episode but I enjoyed it. It had a ticking time bomb feel that I quite enjoyed. Also Mulder’s space nerdiness was adorable. 8/10

Fallen Angel: Similar to Conduit, this episode felt rather slow to me despite the fact that there was a lot happening. It just sort of failed to hook me, which is a rarity for this show. 6/10

Eve: This was FUN! I love when we get to unravel the mystery along with the agents and the plot twists definitely kept me guessing. Props to the child actors who did a great job. I did get thrown off by the many parallels to Stranger Things-even though this obviously came out first. 8/10

Fire: Once I got over my anger at sharing a name with Mulder’s horrendous ex, I liked this one. Both Mulder and Scully got good character moments here, with Mulder trying to shield Scully from all his drama and also showing one of his flaws-he’s susceptible to manipulation. Scully, conversely, was really the MVP of this episode and carried the investigation on her back. Also props to our bad guy of the week-great job being creepy! 7.5/10

Beyond the Sea: Immaculate. Probably my favorite episode of the season. Scully burying her grief in work and Mulder being gentler with her than he’s ever been. Scully’s family lore reveal. Both of them going toe to toe with this killer (forgot his name) and not knowing what to believe. Mulder getting shot and Scully getting FURIOUS. Scully’s complicated relationship forming with this killer while she also thinks about her father (rather reminiscent of Silence of the Lambs). Cinema. 10/10

Genderbender: So we have gender switching aliens who kill people…I’ll give the show overall a pass since it’s 1994 but I will not be revisiting this one. Extra points for Mulder yelling GET OFF OF HER at the guy who’s working his weird magic on Scully. Minus points for him blaming her for it after. 2.5/10

Lazarus: So we got panicked Scully 2 episodes ago and now we get panicked Mulder and it is GLORIOUS. I also found all 3 side characters-Scully’s ex as well as both criminals, interesting, especially as Scully’s ex began to mix with the bad guy. Minus points for not shooting the bank robber until after he started shooting up a room full of civilians, extra points for Mulder being great this entire episode. 9/10

Young at Heart: Episodes with creepy killers are always my favorite, and I loved seeing Mulder get toyed with. Reverse aging science…eh it’s not the main point. Minus points for the worst plan ever (let’s invite the killer into a crowded area and let him shoot at Scully even though apparently her bulletproof vest barely saved her), but extra points for Mulder angst. This man has so much guilt. 9/10

E.B.E: Honestly the plot of this one wasn’t super interesting but that’s not what we’re here for is it? Every Mulder and Deep Throat interaction? Perfect. Scully’s little « the truth is out there, but so are lies » speech? Immaculate. The ending where Deep Throat reveals his backstory and Mulder says « I’m trying to decide which lie to believe? » Cinema. 9.5/10

Miracle Man: A bit of a letdown after such a strong streak, but still solid. Pretty good! And I admired that they had the guts to kill the kid too. 6.5/10

Shapes: Another fun 90s horror episode, HEAVY on the BtVS vibes. And it actually dealt with all of the Native American issues better than I thought it would! Not necessarily well in every aspect, but I was expecting much worse considering Genderbender. 7.5/10

Darkness Falls: Y’all this was GOOD! I loved the sense of impending doom that was just present the whole time, and the melancholic feel of the entire thing. Minus points for the anti-environmentalist sentiments and for the blatant plot armor at the end (they really should have died…but then there wouldn’t be a show). 9/10

Tooms: While Tooms being let out on parole was a bit of a stretch, I enjoyed seeing Mulder stretched to his limit. He’s a good character to do that with. Tooms was an even better villain here than in Squeeze imo, because his craftiness really got to shine through. Huge bonus points for the scene in the car. « Mulder, I wouldn’t put myself on the line for anybody but you. » I’M DEAD. 8.5/10

Born Again: The most memorable parts of this episode for me were the thick fake New York accents and the fact that the kid was named Michelle so I kept quoting Derry Girls in my terrible fake Derry accent the whole time. 5/10

Roland: This was the only episode I hated. I could barely get through any Roland scenes-I thought the autism portrayal was clunky and unnecessary and I just don’t want to watch autistic people suffer. It pained me. There wasn’t even any Mulder/Scully banter to salvage it. In fact, it seemed they were barely in the episode at all. It gets half a point because Scully looked really pretty this episode. 0.5/10

The Erlenmeyer Flask: Now this was GOOD STUFF. I feel like since we know the aliens are there and there’s less mystery, alien-focused episodes so far have been slower and I’ve liked them less but THIS kept the pace up and the mystery going throughout. I was fully hooked. I was also WORRIED for Mulder at the end-I thought we were getting a season cliffhanger! And those chemical burns looked BAD. And I DID NOT expect Deep Throat to die OR for them to get shut down. Where the heck are they gonna go from here? I love it. My favorite thing about this episode was really getting back into Scully’s headspace for the last 10 minutes or so. With some exceptions, I feel like a lot of the season has been shown through Mulder’s eyes (part of my gripe from earlier), but the pilot was 100% Scully and circling back to her here felt right. I also liked that she had to do another hostage exchange-a parallel to the first time she really showed why Mulder needs her. So much to love here. 10/10

Idk how many txf fans I have here aside from my one post that made the rounds, but if you’re here congratulations for making it through my essay! Let me know if you’d like any more thoughts/analyses, and if you’d like shorter, episodic posts when it comes time for Season 2:)

[mia-maybank]

My predictions for heartbreak high season 3

-A backstory on Ant's homelife and how the map affected it -it feels like they built it up all s1 then s2 Ant was drunk or high 90% of his screentime so it feels like he was substance abusing to escape his family issues? Idk but I'm praying they give us this type of storyline in s3.

-Malakai realising he was infact just running from his problems so he comes back -he needs to address everything properly and finally have some happiness because the poor guy has been dragged through the mud in the previous seasons.

-Miss Obah helping Spider with his mother and Woodsy helping Ant with his homelife -Miss Obah makes it pretty clear she doesn't like Spider and it seems like Woodsy just sees Ant as a class clown so I think it would be interesting for them to both realise they are actually just struggling kids with shitty parents.

-Quinni and Sasha becoming close friends & Sasha redemption arc -with Sasha being vice captain they will be working together a lot, which will be interesting with them being exes. It would also be a good chance for Quinni to help Sasha realise her opinions or the way she goes about expressing her opinions is toxic and help her change for the better.

-Miss Obah talking Spider through a panic attack -because lets be real Spider bottles all his emotions and vulnerability up so it's bound to come crashing down at somepoint, plus it would be a good way to make Miss Obah realise that Spider's just hurt rather than the complete dickhead she thinks he is. It would also probably be the first time Spider has an adult figure look out and care for him and that would be good for him.

-Cash forcing Darren to sit down and communicate properly -because I love Darren but they definitely don't know what healthy communication is and to be endgame (which if they aren't I will personally riot) they both need to sit down and fully figure their shit out.

-Missy and Ant friendship -with Missy dating Spider and Ant being Spider's bestfriend it's kind of a given and she would be a healthy person to give advice to Ant.

-Missy, Spider and Ant having that dynamic where Ant is basically Missy and Spider's child -because Spider already has such a soft spot for him and I can just see them both giving him advice together and looking after him, especially if Ant gets a storyline about his parents being neglectful.

-Lots of Ant and Spider friendship screentime -in the first two seasons they are practically attached at the hip so the writers better keep it that way for my sanity.

-Malakai's reaction to Missy dating Spider as well as Spider apologising to Malakai if (when) he comes back and Malakai being shook by the fact that Spider's actually changed - it would be a good way to show Spider's really trying to change plus I feel like Malakai's reaction to Missy and Spider being together would be so funny.

-A scene where Malakai is hurt because he thinks Amerie just ignored his letter and Amerie is like "what letter?" -the writers have literally set this up by burning the letter and I'm now terrified.

-Dusty coming back to Hartley -they could so easily make up a reason for Dusty to come back and I think it would be interesting to see how he fits back in now Spider is growing to be a better person.

-Ant finding out Harper made the map too and being upset about it since it literally outed him and Spider going full protective best friend mode -the fact that everybody still fully blames Amerie just doesn't sit right with me and with Ant probably being the most affected by the map (considering his Christian parents) and with him falling for Harper he would definitely feel the most betrayed.

-Ant coming out to Spider properly or having a conversation with him about his sexuality -I think the writers just completely forgot that Ant is canonically not straight and it would be nice for it to be acknowledged, even in a small way.

-Cash self harm storyline and the others finding out the meaning of his name -This was set up with the writers revealing the meaning of his name at the end of s2 so it makes sense.

-Spider having less trust in teachers after Voss, leading to Woodsy and Miss Obah finding out Voss slapped Spider -because he literally slapped a child surely the wiriters won't forget about it and just move on??

-Ant breaking down sobbing in Spider's arms or vice versa -they are each others first point of comfort so it makes sense they will lean on eachother throughout their family issues. Plus I could so imagine a scene of Spider just completely breaking down in Ant and Missy's arms because he seriously does just bottle everything up until he explodes.

[gfbillpotts]

One thing I'm obsessed about with Kelvin and Keefe is that they falsely look like the "delusional x indifferent" trope. You know, those ships or dynamics where one is constantly worshipping the other and the other is constantly belittling them.

Yes, sometimes Kelvin can be a little dismissive of Keefe. But he's also so affirming for so much of the time, in surprising ways?? When Keefe said he wanted to bring his swords for Cousin's Night, I thought "Kelvin is gonna be embarassed of him and tell him to cool down." But not only does he encorage Keefe, but cheers him on during the performance AND tells him it was the best part of the night!!

In S2 when Keefe gets caged for not carrying the cross, he tells Kelvin he failed him. Again, I thought "Kelvin is gonna agree as a way of deflecting from his own shortcomings" but Kelvin was perplexed Keefe would even think that and promptly told him HE was the one to fail. He even desperately tells the men to take the cross off Keefe's back bc he's so worried about him he doesn't even care about the bet.

Kelvin constantly owns up to his shortcomings with Keefe, sometimes later than sooner, but always. And he always voices how proud he is of him, how important he is to him, what a great job he's doing.

And Keefe on the other end provides Kelvin with encouragement. He's someone who knows Kelvin personally and yet doesn't see him like a desaster baby like the rest of his family. He is there to pick up the pieces everytime Kelvin is down and to make him believe he can do it.

I just love ships where you can clearly see love, respect and admiration being shown from both sides. It's actually so rare and I hope we get to see even more of it next season.

[mysteryanimator]

What music would you believe would represent Mizrak? I was thinking his theme song would be, ✨"Unholy" by Sam Smith.✨

Because he is doing something unholy with that pretty face dragon vampire.👀👀😉

You've opened Pandora's box here. To tell you I have MULTIPLE playlists for both Mizrak and Olrox (and multiple playlists for their dynamic) is an understatement. Right now they're a mess/all over the place, but Unholy by Sam Smith is definitely on a couple of them. It's super hard for me to pick like ONE SONG, so I'm giving you multiple HAHAHAHA.

Here are a few songs I personally think fit Mizrak, categorised by general Mizrak and spicy-core Mizrak. Also, you're getting explanations for each song because I think too hard about my music choices. BTW, all thoughts are my own, I'm just being really silly since season 2 news is coming soon and I'm excited.

pspspspsps when nocturne s2 comes out make sure to watch it and give the crew the recognition they deserve coz they worked their asses off.

General:

Hell's Comin with Me - Poor Man's Posion This describes about bringing justice to those who have wronged him (and in this case others). Also, there's a line about "paying twice as much for the devil to keep your soul", which I feel like is a reference to indulgences but flipped on its head. Indulgences were an actual thing people paid for so they could secure a place in Heaven. So flipping it on its head to double it so they can be ensured they stay in hell is a very cool way of looking at it. Also, Providence, Feed the Machine and Give and Take get honorary mentions because they also fit well but this will get hella long if I also give them explanations LOL.

Foreigner's God - Hozier A song about uncertainty and isolation from the catholic church. To feel alienated by its ideas and values since Mizrak has been doubting about what Abbott is doing before the events of Nocturne take place.

Icarus & Apollo - Ripto Now this also can be a Mizrak/Olrox dynamic song, but also this can be seen as Mizrak's own self-discovery which is his conflict of the Abbott's path on 'protecting' the church and its people, versus how Mizrak personally thinks/wants to protect people. Collaborating with vampires and using night creatures, DEAD PEOPLE is not a path I think he wants but he's stuck unsure of where God is calling him to, and it's a path he has to figure out himself.

Wine and Wheat - Madds Buckley NOW, this is another Mizrak/Olrox dynamic song, but this leans more into Mizrak's POV along with the fact he's again, conflicted about his place amongst his fellow monks/Abbott since he has to conspire with vampires to keep their place against the revolution. COUPLED WITH THE FACT, he's sleeping with a vampire, it's a very confusing time for him, and all he can say in the face of it "Pray with me, pray with me for this madness to end" while he does the best he can to keep the people he cares about alive.

Father Finlee - Spencer Hood, Justin Ray Stringer I will admit a lot of this is for vibes, BUT, also this song is about a man who defies an almost impossible situation and escapes out alive, with Mizrak's perseverance, the burning passion to live, and the potential to die while trying to save others, is a very him thing.

Spicy-core:

side note from me, I feel like we moved far too quickly from this one shot LIKE WHAT THE FUCK /pos

His Hands - Blegh This is actually one of my favourites I'll be so honest HAHAHHA. (Also just the whole album of It Was a Religion by Blegh mostly fits if you think about it). This one steers more into Olrox/Mizrak dynamics because the song starts off very similar to how Mizrak and Olrox get to know each other. They 'do it again somewhere more comfortable' HAHASDJDS. But after that is all exalted from their bodies, there is something between them that they can't place and the tension is THICK. Also the gradual build of the lyrics "And you know you love him, And you might be in love with him, And you know you love him, And you're falling in love with him" IS CRAZY.

A Night to Remember - Beabadoobee, Laufey This one is super self-indulgent, this reminds me of them a lot HAHHA

Take Me Back to Eden - Sleep Token DOOMED YAOI. Not only do we have religious metaphors to describe a relationship here, is a doomed relationship.

The Summoning - Sleep Token "Did I mistake you for a sign from God?" HELLO? Like I know this is a song very much associated with Astarion, but ik this song works for Mizrak POV and Mizrak/Olrox dynamics. In my mind, I think Mizrak IS looking for a sign from God, anything that comes by his way to confirm his doubts, and Olrox just so happens to be a soft nudge that he should be doubting the system he grew up in.

Salvation - Christabelle Marbun I don't need to elaborate further if you look at the lyrics, let alone the title itself HAHHA. Also, this song is super self-indulgent, like there's no way I can't include this in a spice-core Mizrak thing.

Whisper - Burn the Ballroom Simply the lyrics "Come in, sit down, sweet angel, leave me all your tears." Biting the walls over it.

Whoops that was long but uh I have a lot more and its super hard to condense down to a few LOLOLOL, ty for the ask!

[fatallyaddictedtofiction]

Im just gonna allow myself to yap about supernatural and see where destiny takes me. SIDENOTE IF U WANNA TALK ABOUT THIS WITH ME LITERALLY PLEASE I WANT TO PLEASE INTERACT WITH ME.

Okay first of all im starting with the start (s1+2). BEST LIGHTING TO MOOD EVER EVER EVER. Like you want dark scary monsters??? ITS THERE. I remember there being a reason they changed the lighting (smugly: yes i listen to the podcast) but i CANT REMEMBER. The characterisation of the macho eldest son coded scared eldest daughter Dean is unreal and parallel in epicness to repressed queer allegory something is inherently wrong with him little brother. The brief moments of emotional vulnerability. Dont get me STARTED on Dean's monologue in the s2 finale i'll start crying. It's crazy how rude john is to Dean like excuse me he raised your kid and now ur bitching about him? Try saying thank you for once. I think the only reason john actually said im proud of you was because he realised when azazel said it dean was like "ur not my dad" and to john it was a little "oh shit" moment. Sam has every right to be angry but every time he gets angry at dean something in me shatters a little because deans trying so hard for himself and sam and sam doesnt know who or how to lash out (emotional dysregulation baybee) so aims for deans jugular like nooo honeyyyy noooooo. This era was the best sam in my opinion.

Rest of the show down here:

Onto S3-5. Cant remember jack about season 3. Season 4 CASTIEL MY BELOVED MY LIGHT MY LIFE MY REASON FOR LIVING. Absolutely loved everything about Weird Cas and i wanted more of him why did they have to domesticate him. His and Deans dynamic was impeccable and yk something??? I wanted to see Dean in hell torturing people i wanted to see it on his face how much he hated that he enjoyed it and i wanted to see Cas' face at watching the righteous man lose. Like the best we got was Yellow Fever GOD I LOVED THAT bit when he was hallucinating the book and it said "you gonna cry?" Like so many people think thats a funny episode but it makes me so sad because he is DYING and from such a young age hes been told to stow it away, lock it down to the point hes HALLUCINATING IT. Cas falling for dean. Im sorry i just. They are the best love story. LUCIFER. He was scarier back then, but i do love later seasons lucy too. Something about the peeling skin and the "we will always end up right here" just slapped. ENDVERSE EPSIODE god so good can we just take a moment to think about it. Okay cool thanks okay. Demon blood Sam arc was fun but had unfulfilled potential. Cant give you specifcs rn its late and my brain needs to get this all out so if you know you know. The whole meta stuff with Chuck was eh until he was confirmed as god and then i was like duuude the faint strings of marionettes are glistening in the sunrise like how do we know --- im getting ahead of myself.

S6-11. I know, its a big chunk. But basically the whole thing could be renamed "Crowley's unrequited love story". Cas and crowley were the best duo i almost forgot like they are genuinely so funny together and i bet it would be great to be tortured by them UMM THE BETRAYAL i honestly loved Cas' episode the only thing i didn't like was how the reveal itself was done like... Idk just a bit... Kryptonite???? Anywho i Loved the tension between Dean and Cas DEAN LOOKED BACK. Um leviathans were my favourite monster but they became so dumbbbb after washing up liquid killed them. BOBBYS EPISODE ALWAYS MAKES ME SOB MY EYES OUT "i raised two boys and they became heroes" allow me to DIE. Also damn impressed a shot to the head didnt take him down but it was lovely to see Deans first world, first solid rock properly crumble around him (forgetting john okay he wasnt a healthy rock) . PURGATORY DEAN JDJSJDJDJD kill me please his fight or flight mode was SO. So sad we didnt get more of purgatory like i would pay to see more i would kill probably but we'll overlook that. Benny my beloved. They definitely all got together Cas included like who wouldnt at that point. Smth i didnt like is how wheneer they went back to purgatory, unlike how dean described it "360 battle 24/7" or some shit like that it was EMPTY. Like please,, i know the plot needs convenience BUT PURGATORY ISNT SUPPOSED TO BE CONVENIENT. But dean recrafting his own memories to make himself believe that he failed to save Cas rather than what he perceived as Cas giving up on him- hang on i dropped my jaw somewhere, gimme a sec i need to go find it-- LIKE. HHHH. The whole mind control shit going on with Cas because his ties to Dean had been severed (saw a post about that and loved it but cant rmb it) and HIM BEING THE ONE TO BREAK IT. The crypt scene mmmm i love. Want more. Mark of Cain dean was literally my favourite. A violent, mentally unstable man who also has bad mental health and is often covered in blood? Yes pls. Cas being with him every step of the way. I havent mentioned Sam in a while. Hes just kind of been there. Hate that he slowly became 2D. Far away in the background hes got his worried expression and is rocking, saying "Dean? Dean? Cas? Jack? Dean?" Like writers why did u strip his personality except for worry. Do Not get me started on the whole Amelia thing ill stab someone. But yeah cas saying he'll watch dean murder the world is my universe :). If someone said that to me id say "omg really?" And develop a huge fat crush (somehow). CHARLIE DYING WAS AN ABOMINATION When they brought back Eileen why not charlie like. Dont bring characters back at this point because theres all sorts of issues grr. Amara was cool af but i didnt like the whole amara x dean stuff because it was just weird. Luciferrrrr hes so girlypop i love him DEAN DIDNT KNOW IT WASNT CAS but thats only because lucy purposefully wore less clothes around him to distract him.

S12-14. Im running out of steam. MARYYY. It hurt to see Sam get along with Mary becsuse he never knew her as anything else while all dean wanted was a mom and that wasnt who she really was anymore. He loved her so much but couldnt break through that barrier of "it wasnt the perfect marriage until after she died" vibes. God that scene in s5 where its suggested dean saw +/ smelled what happened to Mary and he was literally backing himself into a corner BROKE me. Havent mentioned the Wayward sisters but please know they are so important to me they are my everything. Jack is also. Loved Kelly, very sad she had to die. Wanted Jack to be a baby but thats not good for television is it. But i love Jack so much hes such a sweetie who can kill with a thought. Alternate universe michael and Michael!Dean was epic af but michael dying like that was so anticlimactic gonna be honest i think they were just reaching for ways to lose Jacks soul. Garth GARTH!!! Hes so cute. I loved all those "hand recorded" episodes btw like ghostfacers and that one teen wolf type stuff. Dean hiding in his room is so me. Free Will Theory is so fucked up at this point ur sat there saying gods been pulling the strings this whole time and i supposed to be okay with it?? I so get why deans angry but i definitely think thats something Chuck emphasised (crappy excuse for crappy writing) to an extreme level because WHAT. Like dude. I cant even describe how out of character he felt at some times.

S15. Currently rewatching and cant rmb much of it. 3 characters dead in the first 3 episodes. They either kill off all side characters or we dont hear from them at all to tie up or shove away loose ends. I cant even talk abiut the finale please i cant rn im way too tired. It straight up didnt need to exist, it could've only been 19 eps. Cas. Castiel. He did want you my darling.

[starry-eyed-steve]

Sandra's Fic Wrapped 2023

Hello <3, it's the last day of 2023, and I wanted to give some love to all the amazing fanfics I read this year. Each one of the people mentioned here is so talented, and everyone should check out their entire work.

(Disclaimer: all fics mentioned are Steve Harrington x reader)

Here are my top reads from this year (in no particular order)

Wildfire by @curiositydooropened (completed series, enemies to lovers) This fic has one of the best world building, I need this to happen in s5, actually. Doesn't shy away from discussions of ptsd and overall, it was so well done. I still have to finish it, but I know Amanda did an amazing job with it. <3

Glitch by @munsonsreputation (series, friends to lovers) This fic is just so cozy and cute. Reader insert felt like a very well-rounded character. You will love all the interactions with the other characters. It's just so well done. <3

whip it! by @schoopsahoy (one shot) This fic was cuteness overload. Loved the confident reader insert, and overall, the character dynamics were so well done, esp Steve and the kids <3

don't think twice, it's alright by @hawkinsquarry (part of a series, hurt/comfort post s4) I think this is one of my fav hurt/comfort pieces I've read this year. The interactions between reader and Steve are so tender. Overall, this was perfect <3

Into Open Flames by @kurokoros (completed series, established relationship, horror, set after s2 canon divergence) This fic has amazing world building. The original monster is so terrifying and well done that I was on the edge of my seat all the time. I adored Steve's character so much, kinda wish the show would have handled his character that way instead of what they did in s3/4. Overall amazing writing <3

confetti by @slashersteve (series, single!dad Steve) My favorite single dad Steve fic out there. I still haven't read the latest part, but I had to mention this series. It's amazing. The characters feel so real, and you'll fall in love with Steve's daughter <3

become the sun by @headkiss (one shot, strangers to friends to lovers) This was probably my favorite summer fic. I adored the small beach town vibe. Overall, that was such a cute read. I still need to read this year's Christmas fic, which I know will be great because last year's was amazing. <3

the view between villages, part one: good bones by @sattlersquarry (completed series, choose your own adventure, s3) Listen this is one of the most creative works I've read. The amount of work that was put in it is insane. You play an active part and get to choose how your story ends. This was such a fun experience <3

the swindling of steve harrington’s heart by @stevebabey (one shot, strangers to lovers) This was such a cute fic, like Steve asking for dating advice in the Hawkins Post was just sweet. I loved all the interactions between him and the reader. If you need a pick-me-up, this is your fic <3

and they were roomates by @sunshinesteviee (one shot, friends to lovers) This fic was just so cute. I loved Robin being kinda in the middle of this and sick of their bullshit. Overall, amazing writing and a quick read if you are feeling down and need cheering up <3

almost paradise by @hawkinsindiana (completed series for now, ST rewrite covering all seasons) I said it so many times, but this is one of my overall favorite stories. Kinda wish we had the reader character in the actual show because it makes so much sense. The writing is amazing, I even shed a few tears towards the end. I can't wait to see what's in store for s5. Also, check out the various blurbs that go with it. There is so much work being put into this, and it deserves a bit more love. I'm gonna re-read the whole thing next year. <3

steve zombie!au by @luveline (compilation of blurbs and one shots) This is one of my fav AU, I can't just choose one thing, so I linked the entire masterlist Their relationship is just so special. I love the world building and the other characters. It's amazing <3

no good at waiting by @familyvideostevie (completed series, sorta enemies to lover farmer market au) This is one of my fav series, and we got such cute blurbs this year from this universe. It has such a cozy vibe to it, great world building and characters. <3

Any Way Out by @hairrington (one shot, angst, ex boyfriend Steve) This fic was a mix of heartache and comfort. Nadia is one of my fav Steve writers out there so everyone check out her entire masterlist. <3

some kind of muted blue by @thecreelhouse (one shot, dark themes, deals with things like ptsd) This was so devastatingly beautiful, I loved that this fic explored Steve's felings so much, something we don't get to see in the show. This was just amazingly written <3

[mangosaurus]

Ceratosaurus, Dilophosaurus, and Compy for the ask game! Btw I’m so happy you get to finally participate in it 🧘‍♀️

HEHE same here! kind of wish i was around while it was still getting passed around by my mutuals so i could have sent in my own asks, but better late than never >:)

1. Ceratosaurus - Favorite character design from both series? (Also who in your personal opinion, had the best glow up from CC to CT)

AW MAN THIS IS SUPER HARD. of the nublar 6 my favorite designs in camp cretaceous are tied between yasmina and brooklynn from s3 onward, mostly because i love the way they both wore their hair. in chaos theory darius totally wins over everyone else though, the team really nailed his design there (but i am really fond of some of the concepts the artists came up with during pre-production! same goes for the other campers, especially brooklynn. that bleach blonde pixie cut is my roman empire tbh)

as for biggest glow up ... i feel obligated to give that one to ben, if just because of the growth spurt. also gonna take this opportunity to go on the record and say LEAVE KENJI ALONE I GET THAT HE'S SUPPOSED TO LOOK A BIT ROUGH BUT HIS HAIRCUT ISN'T THAT BAD 😭😭😭

2. Dilophosaurus - How did you discover Camp Cretaceous?

so, i didn't actually start watching camp cretaceous until a few months after the final season wrapped up—i think sometime around september 2022? but i had some close friends who had been keeping up with it for a while, and after hearing them talk about it so much i was like, hey, i want in! which is funny, because i was never really into jurassic park/world before then? i was more of a marine biology kid than a dino kid growing up. but even without knowing the ~lore~ of the franchise, CC and its characters still managed to reel me in, and now i'm here nearly two years later and my hyperfixation is still going strong!

3. Compy - Favorite duo/trio/friendship and why?

favorite purely platonic duo goes to ben and yasmina EASILLYYYY. they just get each other on such a personal level, and i love seeing ben go from this kid yasmina begrudgingly tolerates to someone she trusts enough to confide in, both in JWCC s5 when she realizes she might harbor romantic feelings for sammy, and then again in JWCT s1 when her relationship with sammy has hit a rough patch. shout out to yasmina and darius though, their interactions in JWCC s2 were really sweet, they don't get enough love imo. i've said this at least three billion times before but if kenji is darius's shitty older brother then yasmina is darius's cooler older cousin

as for my favorite trio, i feel like most people would probably say either yasammy + ben or the original three (darius kenji and brooklynn) but for me it's darius brooklynn and ben 🥹 their individual dynamics all mean so much to me, and it doesn't hurt that i also lowkey highkey ship them as an OTV with darius in the middle (although if i had to seriously ship ben with any of the girls, it'd be brooklynn, lol)

🦖✨ JWCC/CT ask game!

[nalyra-dreaming]

Hello again! First I just want to say a big thank you to you and @virginiaisforvampires and @cbrownjc for answering my really long DM ask awhile ago! <3

I’m again going to presume that during the first four episodes Daniel will keep having flashbacks causing him to realise that there is more to the fallout of the 70’s interview than he might at first suspect. He will probably remember Armand’s ‘Gentleman Death’ speech, which might cause him to fear Armand. Resulting in the new character telling him he should fear ‘the other one’ (presumably Louis) instead.

I’m really curious about the, “You fear Armand. You should fear the other one”, does this character know of Armand’s concern and/or history with Daniel? Might one assume that the character knows about Louis attacking Daniel, and possibly is more acutely aware (than Daniel) of the destructive nature Louis actually carries fairly close to the surface (Paris fallout comes to mind). So the words could simply be a warning to Daniel, who possibly at this point is quite relaxed with Louis but nervous of Armand. If this new character is basically a ‘body-snatcher’ looking to gain access to an immortal vampiric body - are they playing the long-con by befriending Daniel to gain access? Could I be on to something here? I agree and remember that Louis and Daniel will team up during this season, so I’m assuming Louis won’t attack him again - but is there anything that Daniel should fear during this season? Is there a threat?

I saw the interview, talking about next season but I’m not as optimistic as some that the relationship/romance referred to was meant to be DM/Daniel’s and Armand’s. In context of the whole interview it sounds more like it’s talking about Louis’ and Armand’s relationship. If DM stuff is revealed or takes place in Dubai I’m pretty sure it’s a secret that they wouldn’t talk about in interviews. I mean - it’s a pretty great twist, and it makes so much sense to me that a lot of the writers apparently are stage writers. Love it! I really want to see DM take place and the memory-erased dynamic play out that the TV series has set up, but I am worried that I’m getting carried away and what we get might be much more minimal - and that fans will hype and then get disappointed.

The idea of Armand and Daniel bickering/fighting during the interviews for the season to then end up revealing to Daniel that *surprise* this guy who has been annoying you, has revealed himself to sure be romantic but also scary controlling and is someone you’ve rightly started to fear is the love of your life - is pretty darkly comic in the best of ways! I would freaking love it. What do you think? I’m pretty much all in for f*cked up relationship dynamics, since the characters are all fun and interesting. I’m very invested in Louis’ and Armand’s romance too, looking forward to it playing out and I like hearing that the show decided to be more romantic with it! Freaking love all the actors - and I’m so happy to watch a TV series which is actually creative and compelling!

Is there anything related to DM you would wish to see play out this season? Sorry for long ask again! Less questions this time at least haha (sorry!). Again, love visiting your blog and reading all the speculation! Thank you!

:) Hey!

Yes, the "you should fear the other one" IS incredible interesting.

I mean, there is this canon passivity to Louis, a passivity that is almost a chosen trait, because when he snaps... he snaps. (I still hope we will get the "passivity speech" in s2, I think it is such an important one, and Jacob would just rule).

But... trailers are meant to entice, to hint, but also to misdirect. Sam said in the q&a video that there would be other vampires in s2 as well. I... I am not 100% convinced that comment in the restaurant was wrt Louis.

That does not mean that Louis is not to be feared!! I just... this could be a red herring. Who knows, maybe it has to do with the twist.

(What if (speculating!!) Daniel then turns to whoever Justin Kirk is there and goes: "what other?" Why is that "other" vampire not named? Why does the Justin Kirk character know Armand at all? Why does he know about the vampires in that apartment??? (And yes, he could be already be so interested in it all because the idea for the body theft is forming!) Why does he know Daniel might be in danger from that other vampire? You know?^^)

So. It could be Louis' carefully hidden destructive tendencies. Maybe. (Which, btw, Armand used skillfully in Paris, I mean, he literally orchestrated it all for Louis to destroy the coven, a win-win situation for him, lol.)

But I'm not convinced that is what Daniel should fear. Would fear. If modern day Daniel fears anything, then I think that has to do with something he remembers. The cage comes to mind, for example. The hunt.

Rolin's latest comment re Dubai does come to mind... as much as I think that Louis and Armand do actively love each other (including physically and I really hope they enjoy(ed) themselves!), but... I cannot see Louis go and have "fun" in interview-time-Dubai. I mean, the interview is happening over a few days real-time. Can you see Louis, the Louis growing more and more upset, depressed and crying and wanting to remember feel like having sex? For example? I think we might see Loumand sex scenes in the past, but in Dubai??? I'm... not sure.

And so... that leaves us with Devil's Minion. I'm not sure how much of the past of it will be revealed, but... I think there's a higher chance for sexy times in Dubai for them than for Loumand. For setup reasons 🤷🏽‍♀️

I also think that the relationship dynamics will be as messed up as they can possibly make them. While I expect Loumand to be extremely tender (I believe Assad called it that), I do think that Jacob's comment that Louis's time at the "murder mansion" was "one of the happy times" for Louis and that statement of "same shit, different vampire" needs to be factored in as well. We're talking about Armand after all :) Given the show likes to put its fingers into wounds I believe that will be a creeping realization... a slow, uncomfortable feeling (in contrast to the more open problematic things Loustat displayed). There is a "controlled" aspect to Loumand, because it was orchestrated (in Paris).

Devil's Minion... DM is about obsession, and almost helpless love. There will be tenderness as well, but also very high, messy emotions. It's not planned, it's not exactly healthy either, it's not (yet) with a happy ending.

As per what I would like to see in it...

I'm not sure. I want them to go full-in, in whatever aspects they choose to give us this season. The cage I would love to see, also as an echo to Lestat being tortured, maybe.

This season is about painful, uncomfortable realizations and repercussions of previous actions.

That goes for them all - and so what I hope for is what we'll get I bet :)) (At least nothing of the trailers, interviews or BTS pix has given me reason to believe otherwise^^)

Hannah Moscovitch said this season would destroy us, and I believe her... and I want that, badly :)))

[quidfree]

accidentally deleted this ask but for the anon asking what my gripes were with iwtv’s finale / this season:

look i love this show. ive never read the books* and i thoroughly enjoyed the one time i watched the movie mostly bc of tom cruise and kirsten dunst acting circles around bradd pitt. the show to me really elevates the material, it has phenomenal writing, the acting is obviously stellar, i think it does a great job at being that dark gothic romance that is both deeply tragic and fucked up and funny etc etc.

a key element of the adaptation is evidently that they have recontexualised the characters in ways that both add depth and nuance to them. when we meet him louis is a black gay man in a deeply racist and homophobic setting who hardens himself to survive and rise above as much as he can. claudia is a young black woman who has always faced societal violence and neglect because of this. armand’s whole arc as an exploited and fetishised child whose trauma has become his identity is also encased in colonial violence. i’m not from the communities they are so i can’t speak for everyone, but i think for the most part the show is pretty good at having these changes enrich the show and acknowledge what an impact this has on dynamics and the characters. s1 explicitly addresses how lestat handwaves away the racism louis experiences as something he can just overcome because he’s a vampire now, how lestat himself plays into racist imbalances of power in his patriarchal relationship in their home esp wrt claudia, how he goes to capture claudia on the train being portrayed to echo a slave-catcher, etc. s2 has the trial obviously set up like a lynching (claudia says so much herself), with lestat’s testimony framing the two black people he abused as the aggressors and himself as the victim, and even when lestat is genuinely apologetic and remorseful it’s because he’s allowed his tears and victimhood while louis and claudia are not. all this to say there is obviously lot of conscious thought that goes into the way the characters’ races feed into the show and the story and it oftentimes is very effective, as well as aware of audience perceptions of the characters and how the irl audience’s own biases might need addressing.

unfortunately for me there are two aspects of s2 that i feel are kind of outliers in this regard, and not in a way that makes sense/feels intentionally uncomfortable to me. 1) is madeline’s backstory, and 2) is the change of having armand actually have been plotting to murder both louis and claudia at the trial, and lestat have been the one to save louis.

1) to me is just really… weird. i feel like i know why they wrote her that way. it makes madeline a ~morally grey character~ by default so she fits in with the rest of the cast, and there is an element to the very real misogynistic vitriol and violence post-ww2 directed at french women even falsely accused of having slept with the invading nazi occupiers that feels very in line with the things the show likes to examine and point to as examples of plain old human barbarism and othering. but the way they present it in the show, unquestioned, not as a dubious survival tactic or a multi-faceted situation but an actual love story that madeline has no remorse for, is very off-putting to me. madeline is not louis and claudia who ignore the atrocities of the war because those are human affairs and they are no longer human but supernatural monsters. madeline is a normal person whose peers- jewish people, queer people (surely her own community), political dissidents of any kind- have been put down like dogs throughout the occupation, sent to prison camps at best and death camps at worst, and she never even has a line of dialogue addressing conflicting feelings about this? no one ever challenges her on it? the people painting nazi symbols on her shop are consistently framed as villainous? it just feels weird to me that claudia’s “weird white lady” has this saccharine romance with her, a black woman, without the show ever exploring any friction in that dynamic given madeline’s apparently uncomplicated nazi romance. madeline being a femme tondue is a great idea, but the execution leaves to be desired imo.

2) … oh boy. i feel like i’m wading into discourse here bc i’ve seen really confrontational takes on this, esp a lot of “responses to” people who didn’t like this change, where this is presented as those people being dumb babies who are blinded by their liking of armand and don’t Understand The Show. im sure there are those of which this is true (and ppl have explained better than me how antiblackness feeds into everyone jumping into ship wars and defense of louis’ abusive partners in general) but also it feels very reductive of some valid questions people have. people can argue the change is consistent with armand’s characterisation, which, sure, even though i feel like it feels a little flimsy / contradictory for armand to finally Choose The Coven and allow for them to execute louis but then go feed him blood and allow him to revenge-kill all of them immediately afterwards, etc. i don’t mind characters being More Evil on the Evil Vampire show.

my bigger question is why this change was made. bc my sense is that the change is less about armand than it is about lestat, and specifically setting the stage for the loustat reconciliation, and i do not love that. it’s one thing to make it so armand wanted to kill louis too, just for the extra drama of daniel’s reveal and scale of his betrayal, another push for louis to leave. it’s another to make it so lestat was the heroic captive who not only was forced to be there by armand as per but also bravely exerted the limits of his strength to save louis from execution and then nobly didn’t tell him about this. these are both monstrous vampires who have abused and betrayed louis in their own ways (armand has already orchestrated claudia’s death and kept louis in a purportedly protective mind prison for decades! that’s betrayal enough! you could even have armand originally want to kill louis too and then change his mind!), so why at this juncture choose to have lestat save louis in a move that was originally armand’s? just from the way the audience (fandom and casual watchers) is reacting it makes me wonder if the showrunners were just oblivious to how much this worsens people’s takes of armand (the brown man) being the “real villain” and lestat (the white man) being the redeemed self-sacrificing figure. i’m sure people will say this is placing too much weight on race blah blah blah but it was so jarring to me and the change in viewer attitudes so immediate that it left a really bad taste in my mouth.

inb4 the inevitable: i actually really liked the loustat reunion in the finale! i don’t hate loustat! i like all of the dynamics between all of the characters, albeit my favourite louis ship is louis x therapy (an obvious inference from my favourite character being daniel lmao). this is not a change that i hate because i’m a bitter lestat hater. i have no issue with armand doing bad things, episode 5 was my favourite episode! i just think this particular choice was weird, and felt kind of thoughtless in the service of speedrunning a lestat hero role in advance of his season.

i have other less tangential complaints but overall i think this is a great season of television. these are just two points that stood out to me as being handled with less grace than i expect of iwtv.

*i just started reading the first book today on the airplane so. we’ll see how that goes. book loustat is so funny compared to the show. book 1 louis hates his ass 😭

[blairsanne]

I just finished my first rewatch of taj. This time around, I noticed more than the first time I watched. I was actually paying more attention to the storyline instead of just watching Dean in every scene and how good he looked lol.

I felt bad for Anders and how everyone treated him, even up until the last episode. Yeah there were times when he acted like a prick but hey that’s his character and I understand him putting up a wall and acting the way he does because if how others treat him. Still loved Ty. Yeah at times it was a little creepy with his approach to Dawn but I love the ending how it all turned out for them. Still cried. Mike, still can’t stand him. I think this time around I found him even more annoying. I almost got to the point where I had to wither mute when he was talking or just outright skip it lol. Axl was better this time around. First time I found him really annoying but this time he was better. Love Zeb, hilarious! Love all the goddesses still, except Gaia. Don’t even get me started on her! Especially the storyline with her and Anders. Nope hated that part, couldn’t watch it this time.

I loved it even more this time around! Since finishing it, it got me thinking about it they did go ahead with a season 4 and what would play out. I would’ve loved to see how each of them adapted to their life now without their god powers and who would embrace the new change, who would struggle the most, would they change anything about their life or try and keep it steady? Who knows!? And then what about Axl moving back in with Zeb, do you think he’d eventually start telling him everything or just leave that all in the past and build a new friendship? What are your thoughts on if they did another season and what they would tackle?

Yay, talking about TAJ is one of my favourite things!!

I fully agree re: Anders. I often feel sad for him when people who watch the show accept his brothers' opinions of him as fact, despite Anders himself repeatedly trying to tell them that he does the right thing often, that he's trying to protect them, etc. -- and the audience even being shown that effort on his part multiple times. It grinds my gears that other characters thinking Anders is a shallow jerk is taken as a statement of fact from the writers and not, y'know, the character's opinion.

Anders may not have the same set of ethics as Mike, but he clearly has his own set of ethics (which he brings up in S2 when he's uncomfortable with Helen's ideas for his powers, in S3 with Colin's ideas for his powers, etc...) and doesn't see his own actions the way his brothers interpret them, and I think it's a very uncharitable reading of his character to think of him as flat and selfish, instead of the very complex character that was actually written into the show, with flaws and good points and complicated family dynamics where mostly there's a lot of misunderstanding of each other going on. I could probably ramble on about that forever, but I'll refrain.

Mainly I wish that viewers would take Anders word for it what his own motivations are, because he does outright state them at multiple points, right from the first season where he explains that the thing that got him BANISHED FROM HIS FAMILY was done in an attempt to protect Mike.

I really disliked Mike my first viewing, because I felt like he caused a lot of strife for other characters by being inflexible and believing he knew best. As I've rewatched, I've come to better appreciate his character and the immense burden he bears. I think his attempt at controlling his family is his own way of trying to protect them, and that this was caused by the events surrounding both the toxic relationship of his parents and that he was forced to be the head of the family at age 21. (I still get annoyed with him during the S3 Odin contest stuff but I also headcanon that it was a "fate" thing to force Odin and Frigg together.) I try to remind myself that every character on the show thinks they are in the right, and why that might be.

I have a theory about Gaia, but that's a whole other essay lmao.

My answers to your questions re: S4 will be somewhat colored by the deleted scene from the final episode, which reveals what Colin was doing tossing a red gem on the ground before the Ga.

In the deleted scene (which they filmed in case they got renewed for S4), Loki comes out of the gem, and we were left with Loki and Colin standing in the woods, apparently about to cause some problems.

With that in mind, I have to assume that the Johnsons would discover Loki was in Midgard and try to do soemthing about it. I further assume that at least some of the other characters would have god spirits inhabit them again (mainly because that's more interesting than them coming back to Earth on their own and interacting with mortal Johnsons).

I think it would be REALLY interesting if they didn't necessarily get the gods they had the first time around. Maybe Odin doesn't want to leave Asgard, so Axl becomes another god. Maybe Freki, just for the lols. Maybe they find some new McGuffin that allows other mortals (liek Zeb and Dawn) to take on god spirits!

Re: Zeb and Axl living together, given how long their friendship was, I headcanon that - much like Dawn - Zeb would eventually start to remember Axl, and maybe everything. Alternatively, maybe part of the season is Axl finding a way to make Zeb remember!

Just re: the Johnsons being mortal in general, I have a bit of a hc where, since Mike's career wasn't based on his powers, he'd go back to construction (maybe rebuild the bar to sell it), and Axl would work for him. Anders (who I assume does know how to do his job, despite no longer being able to just Bragi his clients) might even do promo for the construction business. Ty could still be a courier, and as the only one to actually live as a mortal since turning 21, I think he'd have the easiest time of it, especially with Dawn remembering him and all.

I think initially there would be a lot of razzing Mike by challenging him to games and beating him, but overall I think Mike might actually feel really happy to get to be included in those games again after so long. I think losing Ullr would really help Mike chill out. Or, at least, I hope that for him.

I don't really see Michele and Anders working out long term unless Michele started to take Anders seriously. She didn't really seem to understand him very well even in S3. I did feel like Anders seemed to want a more serious relationship (not necessarily that he wanted what Ty or Mike would want, but just that he seemed to be looking for emotional connection in S3, and not only physical, perhaps because of the whole Idun plot?) so I could see with not having Bragi anymore that he might settle down a bit and get a gf. I've always sort of thought maybe mortal women didn't seem like suitable gf material to him because they couldn't know about everything going on (like he saw how being with Val was complicated for Mike) and that's why they're always little flings. We do see him treat Michele and Helen pretty well imo (not cheating on them, taking them seriously as people, etc.), so I thought maybe he would do better with a goddess gf. (See Lofn fic lmao)

Ahhh that was a lot of rambling, but I'm always happy to talk more about TAJ!! Thanks for the ask :)

[presidenthades]

Thoughts on HOtD s2 ep 1 🎤?

Oh boy do I! Thanks for asking, I love having an opportunity to shout into the void on the internet.

I might do a rewatch later this week to try to pick up on additional details, but I’ll start with my initial reactions from last night.

Spoilers for S2E1, obviously.

Love the new intro. The bloodline intro was important in S1 which was setting up the different claims/factions, but there won’t be much more of that in S2. The tapestry is very medieval, and I’m here for it. I suspect they’ll change the intro every episode to reflect events as they occur. Makes me wonder if the E2 intro will have Blood and Cheese. 😬

The scenes at Winterfell/the Wall not only introduce Cregan, but also offer some fan-service for OG Stark fans. It also reminds us of the prophecy aspect that the show is taking. Cregan and Jace had a great dynamic, but I wonder if they’ll have any opportunity to get together again. In F&B, Jace never returns North again, and Cregan doesn’t come south until the fighting is over. But the show might have Cregan participate in battles earlier so they don’t waste his actor.

Speaking of Jace: I’m really impressed with Harry so far! His scene with Rhaenyra made me want to cry, because you can sense how hard Jace was trying to hold it together. 😢 On a more lighthearted note, I like that Harry listened to the feedback about his bad posture in S1. 😅 He was holding himself really tall and regally this episode.

Omigod, Rhaenyra. Emma only had four words of dialogue this episode and they KILLED all their scenes. The scene where Rhaenyra finds the wing and cloak made me want to cry too. And that look she gave Jace when he returned to Dragonstone, like she wanted to comfort him while she’s trying not to break down… 😭

The Daemon and Rhaenys argument foreshadows how Daemon chafes against 100% listening to Rhaenyra as his queen. Spoilers, leaks, and trailers indicate that he and Rhaenyra are going to have a lot of friction, and soon. As a fic writer, I appreciate this scene for validating my headcanon that Rhaenys is the older cousin who does not let Daemon brattily boss her around.

Corlys and Alyn. I’m not entirely sure what the show is doing with the Hull boys. Their interaction was ambiguous: is Corlys their father or not? Or is Alyn just a random sailor who saved Corlys? He’s definitely too old to pass for Laenor’s supposed son.

I was very touched by how deeply Corlys cared for Luke. It contrasts with Rhaenys, who didn’t treat the boys as her grandkids; Corlys seems to have actually adopted them in his heart. I wonder if Corlys will turn his attention toward Joffrey, or if his affection was for Luke specifically. In the book, Corlys passes over Joffrey as heir in favor of the Hull boys, but show!Corlys is very different from book!Corlys.

Speaking of Joffrey, I miss S1 Joffrey’s adorable curls. But S2 Joffrey is also very cute, and he might actually get speaking lines this season. But the moment when he threw the toy (which might have been Luke’s) into the pyre… 😭

Alicole is…interesting. There was setup in S1 implying they had underlying feelings, and I don’t think it’s crazy they eventually acted on those feelings. But I question the writing/directing decision to insert the Alicole scenes for what seems to be comedic effect. The second scene, during B&C, is the more egregious one. The first scene felt very sudden.

I’m also side-eyeing the director’s commentary in the “House that Dragons Built” documentary where he described Alicent’s marriage as “loving but not romantic or physical for a long time.”

LOVING? 🤨 Really not the best word. Sure, there was some kind of affection between Alicent and Viserys, and she took her caretaking duties seriously. But “loving”? Nah.

Aegon got a huge character/writing upgrade from S1. “Good dad Aegon” girlies win (so far). I loved TGC’s BTS commentary about how Aegon enables his kids and competes with them to cause mischief. Again, the fic writer in me feels validated. I just wish we actually got to see Tyland give Jaehaerys a pony ride. 🤭

The brief glimpse of Aegon and Helaena’s marriage is interesting. He cares about her (tries to reassure her about the dragons) but there’s no romantic spark at all. And like everyone else, Aegon doesn’t really know what to do about Helaena’s prophecies, which sound like insane mutterings to people in-universe. We the audience are shouting for him to listen to her, but TBH most of us wouldn’t listen to an IRL Helaena either.

Aegon on the throne was a surprisingly comedic scene with more character development. He’s not very good at politicking (I would’ve told him to give the blacksmiths partial payment upfront, not the whole thing), but he’s trying, and he is willing to stand up to Otto. Again, I feel validated with my depiction of Lavender!Aegon.

Also…HUGH? 👀👀👀 Sympathetic Hugh Hammer will be interesting.

Oh boy, Larys is going to be fun this season. He’s already starting to try digging his claws into Aegon, but based on cast interviews, he might not be as successful as he hopes. And even though people are joking about it, I don’t think he’s going the feet route with Aegon.

Mysaria is getting much less culpability in B&C than in the book, but I’m fine with it. It’s consistent with her S1 character. She’s fed up with the royals (mostly Daemon, now Otto too) and just wants to do her own thing with social justice while making some money.

Alright, now for the B&C analysis.

They don’t have Daemon explicitly say it, but it’s strongly implied he wants B&C to kill “a son” even if they can’t get Aemond. It’s a departure from the book where B&C explicitly target Helaena’s kids and have a more methodical plan where they watch her routine for several days so they can set a trap. In the show, I think B&C repeat the phrase “a son for a son,” so that was probably part of Daemon’s orders. But the only sons that are possible targets are Aemond, Aegon, and Jaehaerys. Aemond is explicitly the primary target. B&C walk past Aegon without even discussing or trying anything, though to be fair he has friends and guards. So by process of elimination, it seems B&C’s backup plan/directive was always to kill Jaehaerys if they can’t kill Aemond.

(Speaking of Aemond, he didn’t leave a huge impression on me this episode. 🙁 He just didn’t get that much screentime, I guess. But I did like that Aegon advocated for Aemond having a seat at Small Council. #Targbros)

B&C have a comedic bit going on while they sneak through the castle, which seems not entirely appropriate. I also think they could’ve cut down a lot of their sneaking sequence in favor of more Helaena & kids screentime, which would’ve made the scene more impactful.

The bit with the dog was totally unnecessary. Someone who kicks a dog is automatically evil, but we would’ve gotten that message anyway when B&C kill Jaehaerys. Again, the dog seems to have been inserted for a sort of comedic effect, which doesn’t really belong here.

I read an article where Ryan Condal said they cut Maelor (for now?) because all the little kids have to be younger in this timeline. TBH they could’ve made it work with an infant Maelor who was offscreen in S1 because, you know, he’s a baby busy napping and stuff. They could’ve adapted B&C much closer to the book with a baby Maelor.

The choice Helaena makes in the show just doesn’t feel high stakes like in the book. I think Phia did a great job acting with what she was given—my quibble is what she was given. I think she was given direction to make Helaena dissociate and suppress her reaction, which contributes to the scene not feeling as impactful as it could have been. Helaena has been characterized as “spacey” and “not there” so far, so I think they were continuing that route. But having her suddenly erupt with emotion in B&C, to contrast with her previous seeming lack of emotion, would have elevated the scene to another level.

The ending Alicole scene really deflates a lot of the emotional heft that did build up during B&C. Again, it feels like it was inserted for comedy. It reminded me of when Jaime’s hand was cut off in GOT, and it immediately cut to the end credits with a heavy metal song that felt inappropriate next to the scene that just happened.

Helaena’s final line, “They killed the boy,” was odd wording. It feels very distant and passive. Even if they insisted on having Helaena dissociate during B&C, this moment when she escaped with Jaehaera and was “safe” could’ve been an opportunity for her to break down and show what she’s really feeling inside.

Overall, 90% of the episode was great. B&C, gruesome as it was, was kind of disappointing. But the teasers and leaks tell us Aegon will at least have a very strong reaction next episode, which should be wondrous to watch.

[weirdthoughtsandideas]

You know, as much as Simbar is spicy while also so cute, I just thought how funny their dynamic can be too.

Here we have Ámbar. Little miss perfect. Straight A student, rich af, always needing to put up an act, literal girlboss (like, literal, she becomes a BOSS at age 19), always have been raised to be as proper as possible. Probably grew up faster than most kids, because she was always expected to act more mature than what she was.

Then we have Simón. Silly guy. Wears beanies. Wears shorts that a surfer would wear. Says corny lines. He’s never been rich in his whole life. Shares an apartment with his bros. He always looks and dresses a bit messy. He likes to joke around and loves to make his friends laugh. He's not immature, but he's also not the kind of mature that Ámbar is - he just has... you know, normal dudebro maturity.

We see the clear difference with them kind of shortly after they kiss for the first time. Ámbar tries to keep it cool, yk, act like she usually does.

While Simón... well Simón is like this.

He's blabbering, he's awkward, he wants to kiss her again, HE CRACKS A CORNY JOKE ABOUT THE "SIMÓN MOBILE" AND THEN JUST LIFTS HER UP AND RUNS WHILE CARRYING HER.

But most of all, he's being himself with her. He doesn't care that she's the high class rich girl Ámbar, who's so proper and elegant. He's his messy, awkward, corny, yet charming self around her.

What gets funny is that in season 2, while Ámbar still puts an act around Simón even while they're dating, when alone she becomes a silly girl in love. She talks to her mirror, going "Simón is all yours now 🥰" with a bright smile, before immediately catching herself. She goes to choose clothes for the date and loudly speaks to herself "I'm gonna find the perfect outfit for mine and Simón's date 😍". She becomes what she considers "immature". She can't be in love? She can't be like that? She has to be in control! Behave herself!

Things then get complicated in season 3 - as Ámbar is going through stuff, she creates essentially this imaginary version of Simón. Simón keeps being the silly dude, but in Ámbar's head he's cool, tough, very masculine... she even, and I don't think I'm exaggerating, thinks he's rather sexy.

The best example is when she has the Solos daydream.

When looking at Simón play, she imagines him like this

When in reality... he looks like this

And idk, there's something so inherently funny to think that Simón's just looking like every guitar guy ever and Ámbar's over here imagining him in leather jackets grinding at her. It's extra funny if you can picture her doing that every time she sees him too.

To add to this, Simón during S3 also has a version of Ámbar in his head that isn't how she actually is at the moment. Only that his version of her is the version that she was in the past - the version of her that he fell in love with. From his side, he just wants to help her get back to "being herself" again, because he knows she isn't right now. Ámbar doesn't wanna go back, because while she did have genuine feelings for Simón in S2, it was also a version of herself she wants to forget about. Cause even if what she felt for him was true, she was still putting up an act at all times, since she still was under the influence and watch of her godmother. And she just wants to break free from everything, both the bad and the good.

But throughout the season she's also still a bit awkward and acts like a "silly girl with a crush" about Simón, especially when Emilia questions her about him. "Whaaatt??? Pfft, I don't like Simón, he likes me, come on I'm just teasing him it's not my fault it's him who's obsessed with me hahahaha-" She doesn't want to, she wants to keep in control and hide it, but she can't.

Simón always keeps being himself. He can be serious with Ámbar, he is incredibly patient with her and while he tries to help her, he also tells her off when she goes too far. But when he wants to, he's still the silly and corny guy with her.

My final example is the rose scene. The rose scene is beautiful. It's magical. It's very romantic and their tension is off the charts.

But also, only Simón would do a thing like throwing a bunch of petals on the floor to make a "romantic road" down the hallway. Also...

I counted and it's about 6-7 seconds from when he knocks and when Ámbar opens the door (side note that is a very short sleeping gown for a kids show lmao...)

The amount of planning for this romantic gesture must have taken so much. He had to...

Go and spread out all the flower petals. He needed to do this while knowing no one else was around, because someone else def would question what he was up to.

He'd need to make sure Ámbar didn't hear him walk around outside her bedroom door.

He had to knock

He needed to get back downstairs VERY quickly, and if he did not run then I guess he just slid down the railing? He was very good on doing it so smoothly, because he could have easily been tripping or being overheard with loud running steps.

He's gonna have to clean up all of this later

Nonetheless, this scene is still so heartwarming and beautiful. But, also, it's such a chaotic thing that only Simón would properly pull off.

Also, it's the way Ámbar just genuinely brightens up.

How she first goes "oh gosh, this is so cheesy, but adorable". But then she smells the rose and just goes in a little "yes!!" moment. Because that's her cheesy but adorable man! And he did this for her!

Side note, I need to comment on the difference between their outfits. Ámbar is here in a beautiful white nightgown, all barefoot.

And Simón is dressed like this.

It's a contrast.

But it's so pretty at the same time too.

They were from different worlds, and seeing them separate on their own, you wouldn't think it would work. But then they get together and it just... does.

-

Ok, so this was just gonna be a "lmao I love how Ámbar is just the perfect upper class girl and then Simón is just this silly beanie boy" but then I just decided to dive deeper.

There's much to analyse with Simbar, and it's really hard to keep it short.

[callmearcturus]

thoughts on OMITB

yeah my family mainlined the entirety of Only Murders in the Building (3 ten-episode seasons) and I have thoughts and its my blog

This show had SO MUCH AGAINST IT from the onset. I'm too old to have seen Selena Gomez's run as a teenage actor. Worse, I have never in my life found Martin Short or Steve Martin funny. I truly mean that, I have never understood the appeal and eventually just assumed they were part of the early SNL school of comedy, i.e. only every fifth joke lands.

AND THEN ON TOP OF THAT this is gonna sound ridiculous but I didn't know the premise of the show was literally and actually "three people bond over their love of True Crime Podcasts and then decide to start their own podcast about a murder in their apartment building"

I had no idea that was the pitch

I fucking hate True Crime as a genre. I am one of those people who think its a deeply dehumanizing and unethical from top to bottom. so an ENTIRE SHOW about three huge enthusiasts who then make their own?

The deck could not have been more stacked against this fucking show.

AND I DO HAVE SOME COMPLAINTS ABOUT THE SHOW. Let me get those out of the way:

god the cameos make me roll my eyes out of my head. i do not get a thrill out of people playing themselves. I find it super false and annoying. (exception: okay Sting was funny bc he hates dogs and was a legitimate suspect for the murder for like five minutes, lmao)

some of the jokes in the show have a "please clap" vibe to them, and no i will not clap. be funny or gimme more fun character drama.

is that it???

oh yeah a big one: Oliver not being bisexual is so fucking baffling and I just do not buy it.

OKAY BACK TO WHY I LOVE THIS FUCKING SHOW

this show cares so much about its characters and you can say that about a lot of shows but OMITB has two specific skills it deserves kudos for:

ONE: even tho Mabel, Oliver, and Charles are the focus of the show, all the secondary and tertiary characters are important and consistent and are brought back over and over. Like Howard, who in S1 is the Gay Cat Guy and in S2 gets multiple moments of focus for him asking a neighbor out and in S3 is in almost every episode and is Oliver's assistant. The fact the show cares enough to give non-focal characters whole arcs to go through really sells the idea of the Arconia as community of people.

TWO: THE FUCKING ABILITY OF THIS SHOW TO MAKE YOU LOVE DEEPLY FLAWED, OFTEN ASSHOLISH PEOPLE.

the fucking FLEX that is "The Last Day of Bunny Folger" holy shit. for an entire season, Bunny was this constant nuisance no one liked, then she died, and over the course of one episode that doesn't try to REDEEM her, it just shows MORE of her, I was so fucking invested. And they did the same shit with Ben Gilderoy, it's amazing.

OMITB cares so much about having COMPASSION for everyone and treating all of them like people. There is no one who is purely contemptible

another thing I love is the trio and the various dynamics

all three of them together are adorable and the way they grow to deeply love each other is great. but also the way oliver and charles drive each other nuts and needle each other <3 and how mabel and charles really CARE about trusting each other and how fast they get invested <3 but MABEL AND OLIVER i love them they are hilarious and wonderful and just heighten each other's bullshit

oh my god and the way the show lets each of them have complex backstories and working thru shit. Charles' struggle with his neuroses and years of rejection, Oliver's connection with his son and how he almost throws a case bc he's in love with Meryl Streep (fair), and Mabel being mean and distant and aloof and it all having a REASON

okay fuck this is so long, some quick hits

Theo Dimas is genuinely the best character in the show, the moment he turns to the camera and signs "People in this city talk way too much" was like the moment i was IN on the show for good. thank GOD they keep bringing him back, he's the fucking best.

NATHAN FUCKING LANE AS TEDDY DIMAS, WHAT A FUCKING PERFORMANCE, HOLY SHIT.

wow so many fucking queer people. Mabel, Howard, Jan, Jonathan, Cliff, Jerry, Sazz, Detective Williams and her wife, Alice, and i think Zoe and Uma might be but I'm not sure.

ranking of Mabel's love interests: Oscar (who is great) > Alice (who sucks) > Tobert (boringggg)

the fucking wardrooooobes

the SETS!!!!!!!!!!

selena gomez' rack in the penultimate episode of season 3 holy shit WOW those tits

CHARLES' CAREER-LONG STUNT DOUBLE IS SAZZ, A HOT LESBIAN PLAYED BY JANE LYNCH WHO DOUBLED FOR HIM EVEN IN SEX SCENES AND IS SO MAGNETIC SHE KEEPS ACCIDENTALLY STEALING HIS GIRLFRIENDS

okay i'm done, omitb is good

[safflowerseason]

old dan x amy fanfiction

I'm trying to flex my rusty fanfiction writing muscles, and going through old files I found this old Dan x Amy story that I never finished. It was a fill-in-the-gaps fic set between S2 and S3 and the tentative summary was : "The two months between seasons two and three, or, the story of how Amy and Dan went to Mike’s wedding together." I always thought this was a kind of interesting period in the relationship...by the end of S2 Dan and Amy have clearly settled into their banter-y "work spouses" relationship and they start S3 literally attending a wedding together. But at the same time, they are also in open competition for the role of campaign manager...I was always intrigued by in the dynamics of that transition. Anyway, I never finished it--it got very long and unwieldy, surprise surprise--but if there are any old Dan/Amy fic readers still out there I thought I'd post the first few pages here. There's quite a bit of general ensemble banter as well, related to Mike's wedding. Enjoy!

The morning after they learn that POTUS (officially, cross his precious heart, no turning back now) will not be running for a second term, Dan comes into the office with a giant stack of paper and starts piling it ostentatiously all around his desk. 

“What is this? Some sort of political mating ritual? Are you building a nest egg?”

“Well now you wouldn’t know enough to say, would you, Amy?”

Unfortunately, Amy doesn’t have a good response immediately—she was up until 2am brainstorming campaign strategies, and she knows Dan was up until at least 1:45 because they were texting ideas back and forth until then—so she just returns to her coffee and Post headlines and ignores him while he bustles around trying to make as much noise as possible. 

Selina comes in late, trilling with brittle laughter and smiling manically—Gary trails her, looking mildly repulsed and mutters “Andrew” in Amy and Dan’s general direction. Amy grimaces and adds “figure out a way to get rid of Andrew permanently” to her list of things to do before the campaign starts. She wonders if it would be considered a misuse of government forces to have Special Ops just take him out.

Andrew notwithstanding, the mood in the office is better than it has been all year. Mike whistles when he gets back from the press gaggle and Dan doesn’t immediately tell him to shut up. People actually use the world “please.” Amy’s fully cognizant something is going to blow it all up soon, but for now, she’ll let them enjoy the first morning in a long time where they don’t have to feel bad about the trajectory of their careers. 

At the morning strategy meeting, they talk about the best way to move forward until POTUS announces he won’t be running, discuss events to add to or remove from the public schedule in light of the upcoming campaign, and at the end of the meeting Dan brandishes his giant stack of paper and announces: “Ma’am, it’s time for you to publish your book.”

“Oooh!” Gary exclaims. “A book! Can I be in it?”

“You’re definitely not in it, Gary.”

“Yeah, Gary, what would you be doing in my book?” Selina demands, and Gary slinks back into the corner. “Dan, is it really the right time for this kind of political kabuki?”

“We need to lay the foundation for your presidential run in a non-threatening manner by reintroducing you to the public in a way that subtly separates you from POTUS. A book tour is the best way to do that, and unfortunately, ma’am, we need a book for a book tour.” 

Amy regards him suspiciously: he’s doing that thing where he appears to sincerely care about his job. This is always cause for deep concern. 

“Ma’am, do I have to write a whole book now?” Mike asks, looking forlorn. Dan glares and unceremoniously dumps the stack of paper in his lap. Mike grunts. “What the fuck do you think this is, Mike? Your obituary?”

“Wait, you’ve already written it?” Amy exclaims, completely non-plussed. “Since yesterday?”

“Please Amy.” says Dan, looking superior.

“Well Dan, I’ve got to hand it to you…it looks like I won’t have to write a single word myself, which is, obviously, the ideal.” Selina’s already flipping through the chapters, looking interested in spite of herself (then again, it is a book about her). 

“It’s basically written, ma’am, we’ll just need to do a few informational sessions about your political career and personal life, to add in some expository information.”

“That sounds excruciating.” Selina sighs. “But if you think it’s absolutely necessary…”

“I promise you that I will make the experience as pleasant as possible.” Dan smiles the smile he gives rich political widows and young women with babies. Amy gets a very bad feeling in her stomach. 

“This is a trap but I can’t figure out how.” she mutters to Mike, and he just nods bleakly.

~*~

Everyone’s about to disperse when Mike calls out casually “Oh yeah, if everyone could finalize their RSVPs to the wedding by Tuesday, that’d be great.” 

The silence he is met with is deafening. 

“…what wedding?” Amy finally ventures.

Mike looks at her. “My wedding.”

“To who?”

“Whom.” Gary corrects, and then flinches as Dan glares at him. 

“My fiancée.” When they all look blank, Mike says, in a more annoyed tone of voice “You guys, we got engaged three months ago! We sent the invitations right after!”

“Mike, I have matters of global significance to attend to that are infinitely more important than your personal life. Infinitely more important.” 

“And who checks their mailbox in the twenty first century?” Dan muses. 

“Hey, I do!” Gary pipes up. “I knew you were getting married, Mike.”

“Sue!” Amy yells out. “When’s Mike’s wedding?”

“June 17th.” Sue reports promptly from her desk. “It’s tentatively on the veep’s schedule.”

“Jesus Christ,” exclaims Selina. “You scheduled your dumbass wedding right as prep for the primaries take off. Really, Mike?”

“Yeah, Mike.” Dan echoes sycophantically.

“It’s not like we knew you were going to run, ma’am.”

“Okay.” Amy clears her throat. Everyone falls silent. “Congratulations. Who is the…who is the woman?”

“Wendy Collins. She’s a fashion reporter for the Post.”

“A journalist?!” Selina explodes. The morning goes downhill from there.

~*~

Amy sends an intern home to sort through three months of unopened mail and retrieve Mike’s wedding invitation. The intern comes back with a lavender invitation printed with navy sail boats. 

“I can’t tell if you’re having a boy or getting married.” Dan snarks. 

“Oh my god, Mike, don’t you fucking dare have a kid.” God, a kid, can you fucking imagine, Amy would sooner slit her wrists. “I’m not getting stuck with just Dan on the campaign trail, he was the worst press secretary since whoever’s job it was to manage Hoover’s image.” Dan gives her the finger behind Selina’s back.

“I suppose it wouldn’t play well with the public if I didn’t attend my own press secretary’s wedding.” Selina sounds like she would rather do literally anything else. 

“Cheer up, ma’am. It’s entirely possible there could be a nuclear stand-off or a global health crisis that will require your attention.” Sue replies stoically.

“God, here’s hoping.” Selina stalks back into her office.

“I don’t know why you’re all so cranky, I love weddings. Sue, put it in big, bold letters so we make sure to schedule around the day.” 

“I think I can do my job without your input, Gary. ” 

“Gary!” Selina shouts from her desk. “I need some caffeine before my meeting with the Speaker, and if I could get it, you know, before I die…”

“Coming, ma’am.” 

~*~

“So when did you actually write this?” Amy asks Dan, later that afternoon. He’s commandeered the white board and is writing words like inspiration and reflection all over it in big letters. “Seriously. Even you cannot bullshit this fast.” 

“Oh, Amy.” Dan smirks. “Sweet, innocent Amy. You think this book is original? I’ve got ten different versions of it. You just change the background information depending on the politician, and boom—instant book.”

“So you’re just mindlessly reproducing soft bullshit narratives that appeal to the lowest common denominator of the American electorate.”

“Yep.” replies Dan, gleefully. “And it’s going to get her elected.”

~*~

A week after they learn about Mike’s wedding, Gary mopes into the office looking like a drowned possum. Selina’s in an endless meeting with the HUD secretary, and he spends the entire morning sighing dramatically over his desk until Sue finally snaps and asks him what’s wrong. 

“Dana and I had another fight….” he lowers his voice, “…about Selina.” 

“Dana who?” asks Dan. 

“I really feel like we all need to get better at remembering information about each other’s personal lives.” Mike complains. 

“We absolutely do not.” Amy contradicts. 

“It’s all right for you, everyone knows you’re dating Ed because he already works for Selina.”

“Yes, and I really regret that fact.” Also she’s not entirely sure they’re still dating, but she’s sure as hell not going to mention that in front of Dan. 

(It has become a-moment-to-which-they-do-not-ever-refer, when Dan had asked her to “grab a bite” after Catherine’s party, whatever that had meant and she couldn’t, because she had a date with Ed, and then Dan got inexplicably wasted with Jonah at Catherine’s make-up birthday dinner and they bonded over acting like jealous Neanderthals. But then the next day Dan called Jonah a malformed super-alien who emerged from leftover godzilla jizz, didn’t mention Ed, and everything went back to normal.)

“So what happened with you and Dan?” Ed asked, the next time they went out. “Did you, like, break his heart or something?”

“He…really hates Boston.” Amy mumbled into her whiskey, and then wondered what the fuck she was doing making excuses for Dan Egan. 

So anyway, they don’t talk about it.)

“Can we focus on me, please?” Gary’s demanding loudly. “Dana’s so mad that I’m still working here. She won’t even let me touch the cheese anymore.”

“So quit.” Dan suggests, sweetly.

“Dan,” Amy says warningly. Selina would have a fucking meltdown.

“Nice try, Dan.” Gary spits. “Selina already told me I can’t.” 

“So break up with Dana. She stole Selina’s lipstick and leaked your precious code to the press. She’s obviously trying to destroy your career.” 

“You have to be a man about it, Gary.” Sue tells him. “I know it’s an unfamiliar concept.”  

Gary agonizes all day. Mike ends up taking him out for a drink after Selina’s left for the evening. They come up back absolutely shit-faced around nine in the evening with the news that Gary is now officially Mike’s unofficial wedding planner. 

“How much did you have to drink?” Amy asks, disgusted. 

“Two margaritas.” Gary giggles. “And we decided on yellow as an accent color for the wedding.” 

“Wow.” says Dan. “I didn’t even know it was possible for you to be even less than a man than I thought.”

“Dan, how is Gary’s bag any different than what you carry around?” Mike slurs.

“Uh, mine isn’t filled with lipstick and tampons, for starters, Mike.” 

“No, just hair gel and skincare products.” Amy deadpans, and is rewarded when Dan gives her a dirty look over Gary’s head.

“You guys, this is extremely unprofessional behavior.” Jonah announces sanctimoniously, from where he’s lurking in the corner. “POTUS would not be pleased if he knew this is how the veep manages her office.”

“Jonah, you literally announce it when a female press aide gives you her business card to give to Kent.”

“They give me more than their business cards and you know it, Dan.”

In the end she and Dan have to put Gary to bed on the couch and pour Mike into a cab, and it doesn’t even make the top thirty list of humiliating things Amy’s done in the course of her tenure as VP chief of staff. 

“Why do I feel like Selina’s entire campaign is going to be us babysitting these idiots?” Dan mutters as they watch the cab disappear into traffic.

“Feel free to jump ship at any time, I won’t stop you.” 

Dan bares his teeth at her, that fake-innocent smile that’s definitely going to land him in prison one day. “Sorry, Ames, you’re not going to the moon without me.” 

“Pity that.”

 ~*~

To absolutely no one’s surprise, Dan is an obnoxious dickhead about Selina’s book. 

Due to the need to get the manuscript to print as quickly as possible, he demands an hour of one-on-one time with Selina every morning so he can mine anecdotes about her personal life and political career. Selina overrules both Amy and Sue and actually gives it to him. Something about how Andrew thinks the book is a good idea too. Fucking Andrew.

Well, that’s perfectly fine. Amy has plenty to do to prepare for the upcoming campaign, and it’s all much more important than Selina’s book. It absolutely does not matter that Dan always emerges from these private sessions looking even more smug than he usually does (if such a thing were possible). As though he knows all kinds of new secrets about Selina. Which he doesn’t. Amy already knows everything that needs to be known, and Gary knows what nobody needs to know.

Mike’s too preoccupied with his upcoming wedding to really make a pretense of caring about the book—or about work in general, so Dan’s writing and handling more of Mike’s duties (whatever they are, if he’s ever handled them, which is debatable). Theoretically, as chief of staff Amy should step in and make some noise about equitable handling of the VP’s communication strategy blah blah blah. But she figures Mike’s in love and Dan, as much as it pains her to admit it, has never shied away from more work.

*

Summer sets in over D.C., and the days get long and humid. The interns dig out the floor fans from storage, and Gary starts keeping scented silk handkerchiefs for Selina to dab on her neck and forehead whenever they have to cross the street. Dan bans Mike from coming anywhere his desk or personal items—“in case you contaminate anything with your flop sweat”—and Amy starts getting multiple invitations for Brookheimer summer family reunions that she, mercifully, has no time to attend. 

The House dithers over a pharmaceutical bill that’s dead on arrival in the Senate. Ben and Kent pop in from time to time with presidential updates. POTUS is reportedly planning a bunch of foreign policy spectacles in order to show off how relevant he is: state dinners, a tour of some East African refugee camps, a summit with Japan and South Korea…

“That’s just fine.” Selina tells Ben, her eyes glinting opportunistically. “Tell him he can spend the entire summer on his impotency tour. I’ve got everything under control here, in the actual United States of America.”  

“Yeah yeah yeah.” Ben replies, his mouth twisting into a smirk in spite of himself. “Try and contain your glee, ma’am.” 

They go to Baltimore to talk about violence in schools, then to Pennsylvania to talk to some steel workers. On the way back, Gary makes Mike a pros and cons chart about different kinds of wedding cake. 

Andrew lurks, popping up occasionally to take Selina to dinner or try and convince Sue to put some sketchy fundraiser on the schedule. She, Dan, and Sue develop a strategy to get him out of the office. Whenever he lingers, Amy gets a convenient call from the director of the Office of Investigations over at Treasury, and Andrew disappears within three seconds flat. It’s remarkably effective.

In between his information sessions with Selina, downplaying the inevitability of Selina’s campaign to the press, meetings with Amy on the Hill to try and derail a trade war with Mexico, and thinking of even more creative nicknames for Jonah, Dan writes the book.

~*~

It is, as Amy suspected, saccharine garbage. 

“Dan, you know this…this is fucking terrible, right?”

She’s perched on the arm of the loveseat; Dan’s sprawled over it, taking up a truly excessive amount of space with his long legs and arms. There are balls of paper scattered all around. Writing, based on the way Dan goes about it, looks a lot like dramatically crumpling up pieces of paper and lounging around on various pieces of furniture like he’s Jack fucking Kerouac.

“I mean, thank God you’ve already negotiated the publishing deal, because this is some serious—“

Dan throws a ball of paper at her. “You want your own book, get in line, Brookheimer.”

“Written by you? Pass.”

“Someone had to write it, Amy.”

“Like there aren’t fifty ghostwriters in this town more qualified than you.”

“I dare you to find even one.”

“Guys,” Sue intervenes, without even looking up from her computer. “Take it outside, please.”