#i also love jonathan byers

[flowers-that-sing]

jonathan byers i love you

[morganbritton132]

Someone posts on their Twitter account, “I walked pass this restaurant on my lunch break and there was this gay couple on the patio, oohing and awing into a phone about seeing their little girl. When I walked past them, they were FaceTiming a cat.”

Jonathan replies to this tweet with a picture of Steve and Eddie at a restaurant and he asks, “Was it these idiots or is someone else in the same layer of hell as me?”

They reply, “Yeah, that was them.”

[silverliing]

“If byler were both girls nobody wou-“ yes they would! as someone who grew up sapphic I would love them even more!

@rainyydazze Ty for putting this in my brain

[cuepickle]

Some more stranger things doodles I never posted

Still haven’t worked out how to draw Jonathan right 😭

[emblazons]

ONE YEAR OF STRANGER THINGS SANS VISAGES

Celebrating (Faceless) Stranger Things Aesthetics @emblazons Series Start: August 1 2023 (all episodes)

[sadboyhrs]

Steve is the best ally-

Steve supports Nancy-

Steve is a great big brother figure-

Steve would always protect the kids-

Steve is a good fighter-

Hopper loves Steve like a son-

[jonathanbyersphd]

"Jonathan's night to pick?" -> "Hey Bud, I uh, didn't know what you’d like so I got a variety. Take your pick"

[wu-does-art]

If you’re doing requests maybe Jonathan reaction to Byler?? Supportive brother moment 😭😭😭🙏🙏🙏 you’re awesome and your art rules btw :)

this dude never gets a break. i wish upon him prozac and some fucking rest like he is NOT OKaY

credits to the original text post i could not find it

[pinkeoni]

“I don’t want you to be my dad! I want you to be my brother!” —Will to Jonathan in season 5, maybe

[wheneverfeasible]

playing with fire🔥

wc: 5k || rating: T+ || cw: some swearing and suggestive language || summary: While Steve and Robin are discussing how best to get Robin to ask out Nancy, Eddie enters and has a jealous misunderstanding. || also on ao3

-

They’re playing with fire and he knows it.

He’s playing with fire. The chances of being burned are of course high, but he can’t stop himself either way. He wants this, wants him, more than he’s ever wanted anything or anyone. He can only pray that he’s right and Eddie wants him back.

It had started after Eddie’s expedited trial, after hours of working with the group to find the best defense to clear Eddie’s name, after the judge agreed that Eddie wasn’t guilty and he was free to go, after Eddie had cried silent tears of shock and they’d thrown a huge party. After Steve got to see Eddie living life again.

Eddie became a major fixture of their lives and Steve began realizing that he never wanted that to stop. He’d stopped dating because he found he’d rather spend time with Eddie, would always gravitate towards Eddie whenever they hung out with a full group, would always glance over at Eddie when something funny happened or was said because he wanted to see Eddie’s response.

It was when Robin had come to him in tears with the secret that she liked Nancy, feeling horrible for betraying Steve by having a crush on his ex, that Steve realized he didn’t have those feelings for Nancy anymore because he had them for someone else: Eddie Munson.

“I think I like Eddie,” he had blurted out while Robin was mid-rant apologizing profusely and promising she’d never do anything and would always support him and Nancy being together, which had the benefit of effectively shutting her up when his words processed, her mouth gaping as her eyes bugged. It at least gave him a chance to say that she didn’t need to apologize at all because it wasn’t like she could control who she had a crush on, even if Steve had still been in love with Nancy and was trying to win her back, which…he wasn’t. He hadn’t thought about Nancy in that way in a long time.

Speedrunning his sexuality crisis didn’t take long, thankfully. It might have taken longer if he hadn’t been impatient to getting to the part where he could acknowledge his crush on Eddie, of course, and being able to continue liking him from the respectable distance of friendship like had with Nancy and Robin before both those feelings petered out. Except…

Except Eddie continued to flirt with him, and Steve would sometimes flirt back, sometimes making it a game for who could say the most cringe stuff and sometimes making Eddie flush high on his pale cheeks. Eddie would then quickly change the subject, push past everything like it never happened, but it filled Steve up with hope. Especially when the flirting started to get more physical with them all but cuddling together when they watched movies, even when they were amongst friends and not alone, or when Steve would crash at Eddie’s some nights and he’d wake up with his arms full of Eddie, or Eddie pressed along his back.

He had even felt Eddie’s morning wood before, pressing into his lower back where they were curled together, and he discovered that he definitely did not mind that one bit. He hoped to experience it—and more—again frequently.

The only thing Steve didn’t understand was Eddie’s reaction to Nancy.

He always seemed jumpy when she was around, always looked startled when he’d see her while he and Steve were cuddling or flirting. He wished Eddie wouldn’t care about that stuff. Nancy was after all the second person Steve had told after realizing he was bisexual, because yeah they were exes, but they were also friends. And unlike with Robin or Eddie, she hadn’t been around when he realized these things about himself.

Steve kept meaning to tell Eddie that Nancy was fine with queer people, though he kept getting distracted by Eddie being, well, Eddie. He had even told Nancy about his own crush on Eddie, actually. What’s more, there had been something in her expression when he explained what bisexuality was that made Steve think that maybe his little group of young adult friends was actually more fruity than he realized.

Though Eddie had never actually said the words to come out, there had been enough rumors about Eddie in school that Steve hadn’t really been all that surprised when the guy first flirted with him when the world was ending for the umpteenth time, and after Jonathan and Nancy broke up, Jonathan had begun spending a lot of time on the phone with Argyle and sometimes even Dustin’s girlfriend’s older sister, with him even going to meet up with them after graduation. He’d returned with hickeys that were obviously from two different sized mouths and a pep in his step Steve could only be envious of.

Nancy realizing she might like girls was what led them to this moment, however, Robin and Steve with heads bent together as they discussed all the things Steve remembered Nancy liking and the things she didn’t. If his best friend was going to try to pick up his ex, he’d be damned sure that he helped out in whatever way he could.

“What about a bouquet of fresh flowers with one artificial one in the middle? The card could read, ‘I’ll love you until the final petal falls’ or something.”

“God, that’s so cringy, Dingus!” Robin huffed out in laughter, a large and exaggerated eye roll following. “Does Nancy even like that shit?”

“I’m just saying!” Steve protested, crossing his arms defensively over his chest. He thought it was a good idea. But…she had a point. That wasn’t really Nancy’s thing. He could admit that more and more of his suggestions stopped being about Nancy and started being about things he thought Eddie might appreciate. Cringy and embarrassing and over the top and weird. Yeah, maybe he’d take that idea for himself then…

And then, as if summoned by his name whispered in Steve’s thoughts, Eddie walked into Family Video at just that moment, catching sight of their conspiratorial looks as they whispered ferociously to each other. The shop was empty, of course, but they were still careful.

“What are you two whispering about now?” Eddie laughed, sauntering as though carefree, though his eyes continued to dart around whenever he entered a new area, as though looking for something hiding in dark corners, though whether it was monsters or townsfolk who didn’t fully believe in his innocence was always in question.

Probably both, honestly.

Steve moved his eyes from Eddie’s entrance to Robin, knowing that so far she hadn’t come out to anyone else yet, though obviously that would hopefully be changing soon once she’d figured out the best way to ask out Nancy. Steve felt like the keeper of sexualities here suddenly, knowing everyone’s secret but unable to tell anyone else (though he was certain Jonathan and Nancy might be aware of each other’s as well).

Robin hesitated for a moment, her gaze likewise shifting to take in Steve. They exchanged silent words for a moment, his encouraging while hers were begging to be encouraged, and then she was relaxing against the counter with a small sigh of acceptance and shot Eddie a grin next.

“Just thinking about the best way to woo Nancy,” she said with a wiggle of her brows, though Steve could tell that there was still some anxiety in saying it out loud to another person. Even if that other person was Eddie Munson, who would hopefully be more than just a friend soon. Robin had complained about having Eddie as an in-law before, but she’d never been able to fully hide her teasing smile when she’d done so.

Christ. If Robin was actively going to be brave and do this though, was actually going to ask Nancy out, then he needed to be too, right? Eddie was interested, he had to be. What with the rumors and the flirting and the way his fingers lingered just a little bit too long whenever they touched…

Eddie’s expression, however, blanked.

“Oh,” he said tonelessly. He then blinked rapidly, shook himself, and plastered a smile on his face as he moved towards the shelves of VHS’s.

The smile, Steve noticed, did not reach his eyes.

“Well. Good luck with that,” Eddie said, turning his gaze towards Steve for some reason when he said that. “Wayne asked me to pick him up a movie,” he explained, picking up one called Vision Quest before frowning at the cover. “Something about that dude’s face bothers me,” he muttered to himself, putting it back.

“You know, you could sound more enthusiastic,” Robin drawled sarcastically, obviously trying not to pout.

Eddie shot her a pinched look, gaze darting to Steve again before hastily looking away. “Hey, I already said it was some true love shit. Do you need me to hold Steve’s hand during it?” he scoffed. “Might cramp his style.”

Steve exchange a furrowed brow look with Robin. Why would he need to hold Steve’s hand for Robin to ask out Nancy? Not that he was complaining about holding Eddie’s hand. No, quite the opposite in fact. And what was that about true love? He didn’t recall them ever mentioning Nancy and Robin together before.

He shrugged at Robin’s silent question asking what Eddie’s sudden deal was before turning his attention to the metal head and lifting his hand to wiggle his fingers.

“I dunno, Munson. Maybe I do need you to hold my hand,” he teased, though he wanted to frown again when, instead of laughing or smiling or teasing back, Eddie scowled at the next movie he picked up. He hesitated before moving around the counter. “Hey, you okay, Eddie?”

“Fine!” Eddie said hurriedly, and a little aggressively to be quite honest, Steve couldn’t help thinking. Rude. Eddie just huffed though and put the movie back before scanning for something else, eventually picking up something called Hoosiers. Steve had been eyeing that one for himself, actually, since it intrigued his inner Indianian jock, but he’d let Eddie take it for Wayne if he wanted. Maybe he could actually watch it with Wayne.

That was another benefit of his and Eddie’s friendship: Wayne Munson. Though the guy didn’t know all that had gone on, he knew enough to just let the fact that his nephew was suddenly best friends with a Harrington slide. And he liked sports, giving Steve someone to talk to about it finally besides someone still in high school.

Though, sometimes Lucas joined in on it, and the three of them would watch a game together at the trailer while Eddie just shook his head at having three sports lovers in his life suddenly. Steve could tell he was secretly pleased, however, and was always a little nicer to Lucas to make up for being a jerk about it all before everything went down. He even now went to all of the kid’s games, sitting between Steve and Wayne for protection against anyone who thought to start anything.

Eddie had once asked if Steve was sorry he could never take a date to the games anymore, to which Steve had answered that he’d brought Eddie, hadn’t he? And they even had their own personal chaperone with Wayne. Eddie had flushed, hidden behind his hair, but didn’t bring it up again like Steve had expected him to like they did with other reoccurring jokes.

Anyway, back to Eddie’s sudden moodiness, Robin had less far patience for Eddie’s shit than Steve did, seeing as how she wasn’t the one with a raging crush on the guy. She rolled her eyes and picked up a bag of Reese’s Pieces and threw it at Eddie. “Why are you being such a dick right now? Stop being homophobic.”

That got a reaction out of Eddie. He spun around to face Robin, ignoring the bag that hit his shoulder and fell to the floor while spluttering and pink in the face. “How am I being homophobic, Buckley? How is that even possible when I’m—” Eddie cut himself off quickly, shooting Steve what looked like a panicked expression for some reason. “A-anyways, how am I being homophobic right now?”

“I mean, I literally just came out to you and you didn’t even bat an eye. You just ignored it to go huff about…I don’t know, whatever it is you’re huffing about,” she snarked, and Steve could tell she was just barely refraining from rolling her eyes again, and also that she was a little hurt her grand revelation didn’t merit a reaction. He moved over and bent down to pick up the fallen bag before it could be crushed under Eddie’s sneakers as he stomped to the counter, shaking his head a little at their antics, though he glanced at the bag with a small smile too.

Eddie was actually the one that informed him about the history of the candy. How it had been a relatively newer candy, not all that popular compared to the well-known M&M’s, but the latter company had declined being featured in that alien puppet movie a few years back and so the Reese’s brand stepped in instead. After the movie did so well, the candy exploded in popularity, which Steve thought was just simply crazy.

Eddie was full of random facts like that. He never made Steve feel stupid for not knowing them either, which was honestly one of the main reasons Steve had started falling for him as hard as he was. He wondered if that meant he had some kind of praise kink, since he still thought about Eddie’s compliments back during everything and felt his stomach pleasantly squirm at them.

Now, however, Eddie was suddenly leaning over the counter and staring at Robin with wide eyes and a dropped jaw, causing Robin to rear back in startled and confused concern.

“Holy shit, Buckley, you’re a…” He swallowed, tensing as he glanced over his shoulder at Steve, before looking back at Robin with raised brows. “You-know-what?” he hissed.

Robin and Steve exchanged another confused look (Steve could vaguely hear Dustin’s snide voice telling them that their faces would stay that way if they didn’t stop) before she snorted and crossed her arms over her chest. “A raging, flaming lesbian? Yes, Munson, I thought that was clear by the fact that I’m trying to score a date with Nancy Wheeler.” This time she didn’t refrain and rolled her eyes again so hard it looked like it hurt.

“Yeah, dude,” Steve snorted as he moved to lean back against the counter beside Eddie, resting one elbow on the countertop as he tore open the bag of candy still in his hand. He offered it to Robin first, who held out her hand and let him pour some out, not taking her hand back until he picked out the yellow ones from her palm. They were his favorite and she always let him have them, just he let her have all the orange ones.

He held the bag out to Eddie next, who still looked gobsmacked for some reason. He shook the bag until Eddie held out his hand automatically. With the same automation Eddie began picking out the yellows and oranges to set them aside in front of Steve and Robin respectively, keeping the brown ones for himself. Robin began picking out the browns from her hand for him as well as Steve divided up the rest of the bag.

“Wait wait wait,” Eddie said after a moment. He turned to look at Steve. “You knew she was…” he trailed off uncertainly.

“Gay? I should hope so since I’m trying to help hook her up with my ex-girlfriend,” he grinned with a chuckle, dropping a few of the yellow pieces in his mouth. He winked at Robin. “You know that means that we’ll have inadvertemph—” Steve started to say before Robin’s free hand was covering his mouth to prevent him from saying something crude about being with the same girl.

“Don’t be repulsive,” Robin shuddered, dropping her hand with a yelp and grimace when she felt Steve lick her palm, grumbling as she wiped it off on her vest while Steve just continued grinning at her.

Eddie watched this like he was watching a tennis match, his brow furrowing in further confusion. “Wait…so…” He thickly swallowed, glancing at Steve with a peculiar expression on his face. Steve hoped it was, well, hope. “You’re not trying to get back with Wheeler?”

“Absolutely not,” Steve said, dropping the rest of the yellow pieces in his mouth and scrunching the bag up to drop behind the counter, chewing the large mass quickly. “That ship has long since sailed.” He was the one that hesitated this time, and even without looking at her, he could hear Robin’s silent communication. He shuffled a little against the counter, turning to properly face Eddie.

Shit. He hadn’t been expecting to do this so soon. The fire he was playing with could very well burn him alive right now if this went poorly. But…

Eddie liked him. He had to, what with the way they’ve been flirting and all but canoodling when they watched movies and things together.

“I, uh…I actually have someone else I’m interested in,” he admitted.

And…oh. Eddie’s face, which had started to look hopeful at the thought that Nancy wasn’t his interest anymore, fell again. And that…Steve knew what that meant. He was good at flirting again, could tell when girls were genuinely into him, and he’d picked up those signs from Eddie plenty of times before. He had been second guessing everything because Eddie was a boy.

But he knew this.

Eddie had thought he was interested in Nancy still and had become as bitchy as Steve could get. He looked hopeful when Steve said he wasn’t into Nancy. Looked dejected when Steve said there was someone else.

He had thought it was true, but…this confirmed it, didn’t it? Eddie showed all the right signs of having a crush on him. Eddie liked him.

Steve’s grin then was blinding. Robin choked a little on her own orange Reese’s Pieces before scooping the last few up from the counter into her hand and muttering about needing to check the back for something. God, he loved her so much.

“You are?” Eddie asked, and Steve could see him drawing back into that bitchy shell he’d been hiding in earlier. God, he was adorable.

“Yeah, I am. He’s really smart, but also kind of dumb. I’ve been flirting for ages and he still somehow hasn’t clocked that I have this massive crush on him apparently. I thought I was being obvious,” he teased.

Eddie was still withdrawing backwards, even physically this time as his body shifted to turn away, that familiar pinch between his eyebrows. Steve suddenly recalled a similar look when Eddie threw his vest at him back in the Upside Down, when he and Nancy had been lightly flirting.

Ohhhhh, Eddie’s down bad for him, Steve couldn’t help but think with an even wider grin. Even before Steve had clocked it all. He could only lament his double-guessing things for so long now. He might have been able to score a boyfriend months ago if he’d recognized and accepted the signs sooner. Oh well. No time like the present.

“Well, I’m sure she’s just shy,” Eddie muttered, eyes glaring down at one of the brown candies on the counter with pursed lips. He placed his thumb down on it and pushed until the hard candy shell cracked and the peanut butter filling inside smeared out. Steve couldn’t even find it in himself to be annoyed enough to care. He was far too pleased with himself. “Probably doesn’t think someone like King Steve could like her.”

That was another tell-tale sign that Steve had always ignored. Eddie had a habit of referring to him as his old moniker whenever Steve would talk about taking out girls before. It made Steve wonder if this crush Eddie had on him had been going on for a while. Even ever since high school.

Damn, but Steve really was an idiot for missing out on it for so long. Despite what he had thought was reciprocal interest this entire time, known to the both of them, he hadn’t been quite certain Eddie felt the same way. But surely his own interest had been evident? It wasn’t like he hid his sexuality, had been more openly flirting with Eddie, and sometimes even Jonathan for the fun of it, though both he and Jon knew it was just teasing and nothing real.

Though…

“Eddie,” he laughed, shaking his head. Eddie just started smashing another Reese’s Pieces piece causing Steve to roll his eyes. “Eddie,” he said a little more firmly, finally making the pair of brown eyes he thought about a little too much maybe turn to look at him. “I said ‘he,’” he pointed out.

Confusion marred Eddie’s face as he tried to work out what Steve was telling him. It made Steve wonder if he really did give off such great hetero vibes that Eddie’s gaydar hadn’t clocked him yet despite everything. And he thought his gaydar was shit. Jesus fucking Christ.

“‘He’ who?” Eddie finally asked, still looking confused.

“We’re talking about my crush,” Steve reminded Eddie, and sue him if his own tone got a little bitchy, but Eddie was being completely obtuse.

“What, does she have a boyfriend?”

“Oh my god,” Steve huffed out, partly annoyed and partly completely fucking enamored by the idiot before him. But he supposed that meant Eddie was in good company, since Steve was an idiot too for not having clocked how obvious the older boy was with his crush all this time, even before Steve had been aware of his own feelings. Two dumbass peas in a pod.

Shaking his head, Steve reached out and covered Eddie’s hand decimating the candy with his own. “My crush, Eddie. I said he’s really smart but kind of dumb,” he said with slow emphasis on the correct pronouns.

Eddie had stilled under Steve’s hand when he covered Eddie’s, but it took a few moments more of furrowed brows and pursed lips before Steve’s words finally seemed to catch. Eddie stiffened, his muscles going tense, his expression going slack and neutral.

Steve should have expected it, should have known that Eddie still wouldn’t get what Steve was trying to say, but the look of utter devastation that briefly crossed Eddie’s face before he swallowed it down hiding behind his hair by ducking his head, still surprised Steve.

How was Eddie not getting this?

Huffing slightly, Steve slid his hand from Eddie’s to reach out and brush Eddie’s hair back, hooking it behind his ear. “Like I said. Kind of dumb. He never seems to realize when I’m seriously flirting with him. I would have thought it’d be obvious by now. It’s not like I cuddle with Jon when we watch movies together.”

Eddie, this time, finally seemed to be catching on. He sucked in a sharp breath, eyes widening before ever so slowly turning to face Steve. The flush to his cheeks and forehead rapidly spread through his entire face and down into the collar of his shirt. Steve thought he should be congratulated for not pressing Eddie into the counter to find out just how far down that flush went.

“You—” Eddie’s voice squeaked out. He cleared his throat, his eyes darting over Steve’s expression as though looking for the trick, the trap, the joke. Steve made certain his expression didn’t changed, though he wondered how comforting his expression of exasperation could really be.

Steve let his eyes drop purposefully and tellingly to Eddie’s lips, licked his own which caused Eddie to jerk slightly, and then finally looked back up into Eddie’s eyes with a smirk. “Yeah, man. I mean, I even told him I wanted him to hold my hand and nothing.” He winked. “Maybe he wants to hold something else.”

Typically Steve would not be quite so scandalous when flirting with hopeful-conquests, but he also knew that Eddie wasn’t like any girl he had ever flirted with before. Eddie was brash, frequently abrasive, and more than frequently over the top. He was like a bull in a china shop sometimes, honestly. And Steve couldn’t get enough of it.

Or the way Eddie seemed to choke on his own air, a strangled and incredulous laugh leaving his prettily parted lips. Big brown eyes still stared at him disbelievingly, but at least Eddie was turned fully to face him now. Steve reached out again to twirl a finger in Eddie’s hair.

“Y-you’re not…straight?” Eddie wheezed out, and at least it was a full-ish sentence. Progress.

“Bisexual, actually,” he happily announced, leaving Eddie looking even more floored. “Something about having a guy pin you to the wall and then later say some really nice stuff about you tends to make you realize when you maybe kind of want to kiss him,” he added, a little sheepishly this time.

“Mostly the nice stuff,” Steve quietly admitted with a small laugh. “Don’t get me wrong, the pinning to the wall was nice once you get past the fear your jugular is about to get ripped out by a broken bottle, but it’s really the dude making me feel like I might actually be a good person and always being really nice to me when I don’t understand something that really made the crush grow.”

Eddie’s shaking hand reached up to lightly grasp the one still playing with his hair. “You…you really have a crush on…this guy? Like a real one?”

Steve could only grin, taking a small step closer. “Absolutely. He’s kind of adorable, actually. Tries to put up this big bad rockstar vibe, but I happen to have it on good authority that he’s actually a big softie nerd who cried when an animated toaster got crunched up rescuing his friends,” he lightly teased.

“He was so brave,” Eddie pouted, distracted for a moment by the memory, before blinking rapidly, because there was no way to pretend that Steve’s crush could be anyone else now. He drew in a shaky breath, his eyes darting between Steve’s, and then the most beautiful smile Steve had ever seen spread across his lips. Steve felt dizzy at the sight.

Feeling a little more confident now, Eddie leaned in slightly, his eyes dropping to Steve’s lips before looking back up into Steve’s eyes. He still had to clear his throat a little before speaking again, but the wariness was finally absent from his expression.

“I happen to have it on good authority that your crush might just like you back,” he murmured, and Steve was enraptured by the way Eddie’s eyes sparkled up at him.

“Yeah?” he murmured, swaying forward despite the public location. The store was dead, sure, but they could be interrupted at any moment, or seen by pedestrians walking by the shop. “Think he might be up to pinning me to another wall lately?”

Eddie grinned. “I think he’s willing to pin you to anything you want, big b—”

“Oh my god, please shut the fuck up,” Robin’s aggrieved voice broke in, startling the both of them so badly that they jumped apart as though electrocuted.

Of course, after realizing it was just Robin, Steve gave the bitchiest eye roll of his life and rested a hand on his hip. “You’re just jealous because you can’t flirt with Nancy yet,” he said, tone matching his eye roll. “I’ve been telling you to just hurry up and do it, Buck.” He glanced at Eddie and indicated Robin with a look that clearly said ‘can you believe this hopeless lesbian’ which caused Eddie to snort.

“Yeah, yeah, laugh it up, Hairy. Like you weren’t whining to me about Eddie just three days ago,” she snarked, causing Eddie to grin and Steve to flush this time. “At least wait until your next break before you shove your tongue down his throat or anywhere else.”

“Robin!” Steve gasped, completely scandalized, pressing his palm to his chest. “I expect at least one date first before I shove my tongue anywhere except Eddie’s mouth.”

Eddie choked, face once more flaming, but Steve could only grin at Robin’s disgusted expression.

“The first part sounds fantastic though,” he acknowledged, reaching down to grab Eddie’s hand in his own. “I think I’ll take my first break now. Be back in fifteen, sweetie!” he laughed, tugging a dazed Eddie towards the front door, knowing Eddie’s van was parked somewhere nearby.

“Don’t forget to use protection later, you whore!” Robin merely called back, and despite all her snark and annoyance, Steve knew she was happy for him. And happy for herself that she didn’t need to hear him mooning after Eddie anymore, though she would probably come to regret what Steve was like now that he and Eddie were together.

It was fine, she’d get her payback once she asked out Nancy later that night too.

As for Steve, he proved himself to be a liar, because that night he definitely put out before their first date. Though, he figured with a teasing smile when Eddie brought that up, they had been on several dates at Lucas’s basketball games, remember? So really, he had plenty of lost time to make up for that night, again and again and again.

They might have been playing with fire, him and Robin, but how else were you expected to keep warm?

-

Fun fact! The bit about Reese’s Pieces is true! They’re also my favorite candy. Also, the movie Vision Quest (titled Crazy for You in the UK and Australia) starred a young Matthew Modine, who played Dr. Martin Brenner in Stranger Things. Hoosiers is about a high school basketball team in Indiana going to the state championships.

-

Hostage tag: @derythcorvinus

Courtesy tag: @katyawriteswhump

[share-the-damn-bed]

What's a little more?

[smeddiemunson]

(Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3)

The Harrington house is big and it’s nice to look at, or it would be if Gareth was into the boring minimalist style, but there’s no warmth to it.

That’s all he could notice while he was pulling off his jeans and neatly folding them up to place on the top of a chest of draws in a guest bedroom. The walls are white and the accents a single shade of brown. Even Gareth’s oppressively suburban home had more character than this.

And it just didn’t seem to fit with Steve. Steve, in Gareth’s admittedly limited understanding of him, was more suited to a smaller but still nice house, with appliances that made funny noises if they weren’t used the right way, and was always full of people. A house that had character built into its very foundations.

He met Jeff and Grant back in the kitchen, trying his hardest not to stare too long at the single family portrait hung at the end of the hallway. Jeff was wearing red shorts and Grant was wearing blue ones. It seemed that only Gareth got the memo about wearing black and committing to the Not-Cult Cult aesthetic.

“What’s the plan then, Gare-Bear?” Jeff asked as Gareth sidled up next to them.

Gareth grabbed a can off the side, it was fresh out of the fridge and had condensation trickling down the sides. He assumed it was alright to take it. “I’m gonna talk to Buckley, feel out how to go about this.”

“And what should we do?” Grant asked.

“Make sure Eddie doesn’t do anything stupid?”

Grant scoffed. “Dude, you’ve met him, be serious.”

“I am!” Gareth replied. “I want this to work out for them and that means keeping Eddie’s foot out of his mouth.”

They all paused to remember the many, many times that Eddie’s inability to shut up had gotten them in trouble. He was great at talking himself out of trouble as well, but it was always preferable to not be in trouble in the first place. 

“So make sure Eddie doesn’t say something stupid before he can confess his love and get a pass for all the stupid shit he says?” 

Gareth allowed himself to chuckle. “Yeah, something like that.”

He led them all back out to the garden, cracking open the can as he went. The cold liquid felt good sliding down his throat; it wasn’t quite the peak of the summer and it was only going to get hotter, but Gareth didn’t think there was much point in not enjoying the smaller things in life. 

Eddie was perched on the edge of the pool, kicking his feet gently where they were submerged in the water, as he spoke to Steve. Steve who was in the pool but had pulled himself out enough to rest his crossed arms on the poolside and use them as a pillow for his head. They looked like they belonged in a movie; so caught up in one another that they didn’t react to the screaming from the others playing chicken (Nancy on Jonathan’s shoulders and Robin on Argyle’s). 

Gareth was shocked to see the way Steve was looking at him. He knew Steve was into Eddie, that much was obvious, but until that moment he had just thought it was a little crush.

This put a bit of a spanner in the works of his original plan of getting everyone to play enough party games until they could get Steve and Eddie together in seven minutes in heaven.

“Eddie!” Jeff shouted, “Did you smoke all the weed while we were getting changed?”

Eddie gasped dramatically, clutching at his heart. “Would I ever do that to you Jeffy?” 

“Yes,” Jeff deadpanned. 

Steve laughed delightedly, bumping Eddie in the knee with his elbow. 

“Fine, fine,” Eddie threw his hands up in surrender. “Stevie said we aren’t allowed to smoke and swim so we didn’t light it.”

“I don’t want you to drown,” Steve said quietly, a haunted look crossing over his face that left as quickly as it came. 

Eddie reached out to squeeze his shoulder, something unsaid passing between them. “I’m still here.” 

Steve nodded, then shook his head with a small smile, as if he knew he was being silly. 

Gareth shared a glance with his band mates, Eddie pointedly avoiding it. Another thing that would never be explained to them.

Luckily the game of chicken came to an end with Robin crashing down into the water, her legs pulling Argyle with her, to the tune of Nancy and Jonathan yelling in triumph to break Steve out of whatever spiral he’d fallen into.

Steve turned towards them with a smile. He patted Eddie’s hand where it was still on his shoulder then pushed off from the wall to join his friends, calling for his turn. 

Eddie’s hand hovered in the air for a second before falling back down to his side. 

Robin broke off from the group, stating her intention to grab another drink as she furiously tried to push her now wet hair out of her eyes. Argyle eagerly called for Steve to go against Nancy this time.

Gareth nodded to Jeff and Grant. “Go cheer him up. I hate it when he looks like a kicked puppy.”

“Guy doesn’t know what he has with those eyes, I swear,” Jeff mumbled as he and Grant moved to sit either side of Eddie, both bumping shoulders with him.

Gareth waited until Robin was digging through the cooler and muttering to herself to join her. 

She jumped slightly as she turned away from the cooler and realised that Gareth was there, evidently having not heard him approach. 

“Buckley,” He greeted. 

“Emerson.”

Gareth winced. This wasn’t supposed to be some sort of Mexican standoff. So he changed angles. 

“Eddie says you know about him.” 

Robin’s features softened. “Yeah and I know you’re protecting your friend, but I promise I will never ever do anything to hurt him. None of us will.|” 

Gareth smiled. “I wasn’t worried about that.” 

“So what can I help you with?” 

Gareth rubbed his hands over his face. He was suddenly faced with no idea how to word his questions. 

“Have you noticed that Eddie has a crush?” 

Robin laughed loudly, waving away the bemused glances thrown her way from the pool. “Yeah, I have. I’ve noticed Steve’s too because I know that’s going to be your next question. They’re kinda unbearable to be around sometimes.” 

“Oh,” Gareth chuckled, a weight lifted off his shoulders. “Good.” 

“Why? Are you planning something?” She sat forward, a manic smile on her face and clutching her can so hard there were small dents in the aluminium from her fingers. 

“I was thinking seven minutes in heaven but...” he sighed. “They’re too into each other to have their moment be during a stupid game.” 

“You really care about Eddie, don’t you?” Robin asked gently. 

Gareth narrowed his eyes on her. “Of course I do, he’s my best friend.” 

Robin held her hands up in surrender. “I’m not judging you. I feel the same way about Steve.” 

“Good. That’s good” 

They both fell quiet as they watched their friends. Steve, on Argyle’s shoulders, laughing at Nancy and Jonathan arguing as they strategised. Eddie was squashed between Jeff and Grant, batting on their chests to release him. If it weren’t for his hair not being tied back, Gareth knew he would have thrown himself into the pool to escape. He knew Jeff and Grant knew that as well.

“So what are we going to do?” Gareth asked.

“I don’t know,” Robin said. “But we’ll figure something out.” 

They spent the rest of the afternoon in the pool. Gareth and Eddie made a great team for the chicken tournament, but Argyle won the biggest splash competition they got going. It was funny to just act like teenagers, no school to worry about or crazy religious types out on witch hunts. 

Steve handed them all towels as the sun began to go down. Their fingertips wrinkled and dry as Eddie finally got to light the joints to pass around. They laughed and shared stories; Gareth even got to share his favourite about Eddie calling him from a phone booth in the middle of the night so Gareth could steal his mom’s car to go get him since his plan to hitchhike his way home failed. 

At some point, pizza was ordered while they lazed around. The joints had long since been smoked down to their cherry and discarded on the floor to clean up later when they were less drunk or high. Steve had told them not to worry about it.

Gareth spent his time watching Steve and Eddie pass tapes back and forth, heads leant close as they discussed the music on them, occasionally stopping the tape playing so they could switch it out for whatever song they were agreeing or disagreeing about. He made eye contact with Robin who just smiled gently, so fond of her friends. If he was able to see himself, her look was probably reflected on his own face.

The doorbell rang, heard out in the yard only because Steve’s parents had a device installed that rang a bell outside in case they weren’t inside to be able to hear the actual doorbell. 

Steve jumped up to get it. 

“Eddie go help him,” Robin said, pushing her toes into Eddie’s arm in a half hearted shove. 

“Stevie’s got it,” Eddie moaned, clearly not wanting to move from his spot. 

Robin shared a conspiratorial grin with Nancy, then both chorused, “Don’t ya, big boy.” 

Jonathan and Argyle looked just as confused as Gareth felt. He never got the full story from Eddie about what happened over spring break, Eddie was alive and that was enough for him, but sometimes he wished he could know just so he understood what the fuck was going on. 

Eddie flushed bright red all over his body. “Shut up,” he hissed. But it was evidently enough to get him to jump and follow Steve into the house.

Before Gareth could even attempt to ask about it, Nancy swung her legs around off the sun lounger and clasped her hands together.

“So,” She said as she pushed her sunglasses up into her hair. “We all saw that right?”

“Saw what?” Robin squeaked.

Gareth didn’t bury his face in his hands at her lack of subtlety.

“Steve and Eddie are very obviously flirting with each other,” Nancy said slowly, deliberately.

Jonathan hummed in agreement. “Yeah, it’s not the first time either.”

Robin opened and closed her mouth like a fish as she tried to come up with something to say. Obviously she couldn’t say anything that would out her best friend, but if she denied being able to see it then she ran the risk of being committed to a mental institution. She looked scared.

“And is that a problem, Wheeler?”

Gareth couldn’t be sure where the venom in his voice came from, he was sure that Nancy Wheeler was a nicer girl than her pinched features sometimes made her appear, but seeing Robin flounder and the thought of Eddie facing even more bullshit  than he already had made something protective flare to life inside of him. 

Nancy sniffed disdainfully. “Obviously not. I would die for those two, I just want them to be happy.”

A tense silence fell over them. 

“They don’t know that we know,” Robin said quietly.

“So we can’t be obvious,” Jonathan replied. “Doesn’t mean we can’t encourage them in the right direction.”

Argyle, his eyes trained on the stereo still playing a Queen song, a thoughtful look on his face that looked completely alien. He turned to where Gareth, Jeff and Grant were all sitting together on the same sun lounger. “You’re in a band right?”

Shit. Argyle was right. Gareth mentally cursed himself for not thinking of it sooner. Eddie had learnt Steve’s favourite song, they were going to play Steve’s favourite song as soon as they got it down; the drunks that usually watch them would probably appreciate something more country-rock than metal. 

“Argyle, you’re a genius.” 

(Part 5 (final))

[chirpsythismorning]

This is everything

cr: @hellfiresbyers

[silverliing]

i have an art prompt: imagine lesbyler at senior prom!!

(thank you for drawing lesbyler im fucking obsessed)

Class of ‘89 let’s go!

[sunflowersand-bees]

Hello there. You. Yes, you.

Look. Look at this man.

His smile makes my heart overflow with appreciation for all that's good and kind in this world. I'm not being dramatic. He deserves happiness. He deserves to smile more.

[unfinishedslurs]

welcome to eden

this is a love letter. inspired by this song

As soon as Steve picks up the phone, she knows she’s making a mistake.

“Rob?”

“No,” she says instead of hanging up like she should. 

“Nancy?” He sounds more alert now, and she can picture him standing up straighter, calling to attention at the sound of her voice. “What’s wrong? Are you okay?” 

“Not really,” she sniffs, hating herself for it. “I—can we talk?”

He’ll say no. He’ll say no, because it’s one in the morning and he was probably asleep before the phone rang and she shouldn’t be asking to talk years after she broke his heart and didn’t even remember—

“Of course,” he says, and Nancy could kick herself. “Over the phone?”

“No. Not over the phone. I’m sorry, it can wait, you can go back to bed.”

She hears him huff a laugh, even though there’s nothing funny about any of it. “I wasn’t in bed,” he assures her. “Am I picking you up?”

Tears spring anew to her eyes. “If that’s okay.”

“Works for me,” he says. “See you soon.”

“See you,” she echoes, and hangs up. 

She spends the time it takes pacing quietly in front of the front door, berating herself for using him like this. But she needs to talk to him, and the sooner it’s over with the better. 

Headlights cut through the window way too soon, and she nearly throws herself out the door. 

She gives him a look when she opens the car door, telling him she knows how many traffic laws he must have broken to get here this quick. He just grins in return, ready to point out the felony in her closet. 

“Where are we going?” He asks, and her heart clenches. He’s so good. He’s so good, and she couldn’t-can’t love him like he wants. She has to tell him. 

Tonight probably wasn’t the best night for this conversation, but her skin feels like it’s peeling off and the faster she says something the quicker it will be over with and she can go back to how it was before. Back when she didn’t have anyone to talk to, because Robin might never speak to her again after she breaks her best friend's heart for the second time. 

Just rip the bandaid off, Nance. 

“I don’t know,” she says instead. Maybe she’s a coward. “A field? Somewhere I can see the stars.”

“I can do that.”

The drive goes by in silence, Nancy staring stubbornly out the window. She can feel Steve periodically checking on her, and she knows he wants to know why she called. She can’t open her mouth to say it in the suffocating enclosure of the car. She rolls down a window. 

They get to a field almost out of Hawkins, and the car is barely in park before she’s climbing out, going around to sit on the hood. Steve cuts the engine and follows. 

She still doesn’t say anything. She called him to have a talk, why can’t she just open her stupid mouth—

“Nancy?” Steve asks, gentle in a way that used to make her melt. She pulls her legs to her chest, feeling vulnerable. “What’s wrong?”

“Jonathan and I broke up,” she finally gets out. 

“Oh shit.” He looks genuinely surprised. “That sucks, I’m sorry.”

“Yeah, well, it was never going to be forever.” Except she’d thought otherwise. She thought they were Nancy and Jonathan, the two of them against the world. She hunches her shoulders. “We never talk anymore, and he was pulling away from me, and he was lying to me for months-“ she shakes her head, clearing the anger she feels at that. “It doesn’t matter. I’m starting to realize there’s things I need to work on, too. A lot to work on, actually.”

“I don’t know what that could be,” he says, flashing her a smile filled with boyish, roguish charm. “You’re already the best person I know.”

She sniffs, and suddenly she’s crying into her knees, shoulders shaking. He freezes beside her, before wrapping an arm around her and pulling her into his side. She leans in for a second, chasing the comfort, before remembering what she came here to do and ripping away violently. 

“Fuck,” she whispers. “Fuck, I’m so sorry. I don’t—I can’t—this isn’t what I—“

“Hey,” he soothes. “Slow down. Let it out.”

She wipes her eyes, suddenly furious. “I don’t want to date you,” she says, finally looking him in the eyes. “I don’t—I’m sorry for calling you. I just remembered how much better you used to make me feel, but then I realized that’s like…really shitty of me.”

“Why?” He asks, as if Nancy didn’t come out here to break his heart again. “I want to make you feel better. I like knowing I can make you feel better.”

“I don’t want to lead you on,” she says, mouth screwing up. “That’s why I called you out here. And I know it’s shitty of me—“

“Nancy, you’re not leading me on. I…I don’t want to date you either.”

That stops her in her tracks. “Oh.”

“Yeah, oh,” he echoes quietly. “I—don’t take this the wrong way, okay, ‘cause I know I’m gonna sound like an asshole saying it, but, uh, I can’t do that again. And even outside of that, I don’t like you that way anymore. Uh, sorry.”

She tries not to sag at the overwhelming relief she feels at that. 

“Are you sure?” She studies him closely, trying to see if he’s saying this for her sake or if he means it. “Back in the Upside-Down, and when we were fighting Venca, it seemed…”

He grimaces, and Nancy thinks if it wasn’t dark she’d see the beginning of an embarrassed flush on his ears. “I…may have been feeling things,” he admits. “I was testing the waters, I guess. I started feeling nostalgic, and you were there, and everyone was encouraging me, and it all just ended up in this weird…feelings soup. Sorry.”

“You said you wanted to have six kids with me,” Nancy reminds him. “And travel the country in a Winnebago.”

He groans, covering his face with his hands. “I am,” he says, “so sorry. I don’t know why I said that. That had to be so weird for you.”

“It was kind of sweet?” She tries, not letting her relief show. Not yet. 

“We haven’t been together in years, and I decided to tell you I used to dream about you having my babies. How do you deal with me?”

“Well it helps to know you were dropped on your head. Puts everything in perspective.”

“Yeah, yeah, yuk it up.” He looks at her, really looks at her, and she tries not to fidget under his gaze. Too earnest, too caring for someone who doesn’t deserve it. He’s always tried so hard. To woo her, to be a better person, to keep back the vicious streak she still sees in him. “I meant it, when I said I loved you,” he tells her gently, no sign of that cruelty that had him painting her as a whore for the whole town to see. “Back then, I mean. I just wanted you to know that.”

She wants to cry. “I know. I’m sorry I couldn’t say it back.”

“It’s okay,” he says like he means it. He leans back against the windshield, looking at the sky. After a moment, she copies him. 

They watch the stars together, and the air feels clearer. 

“Where do we go from here?” She asks, afraid of the answer. 

“What do you mean?”

“What happens with us now?”

“Well,” he says gingerly, like he’s testing the waters. “I don’t know about you, but I’ve heard you’re a pretty kickass friend.”

Friends. She doesn’t know that she and Steve have ever been friends, not properly. Even after the apologies they made to each other, she doesn’t know that she could call what they had friendship. It wasn’t substantial on its own, needing Jonathan as the barrier between them. When it fell, so did they. 

“I haven’t had a friend in a while,” she admits. “Robin is kind of a novelty for me. She’s amazing.”

It’s funny, in a way. She was so jealous of Robin, of how close she was with Steve in a way Nancy wasn’t. She’d thought, at first, that it was because they were so clearly dating. After Robin told her they weren’t, she realized how badly she’d just wanted friends. She missed hanging out with Steve, missed his laugh and his squint and his bitchy attitude. She’d hoped that eventually they’d get to that point, was sure they were almost there before Starcourt. In a way, she’d been jealous of Robin for stealing Steve. She knew it was ridiculous. Steve had found a friend, a real friend who hadn’t cheated on him or slept with his girlfriend. She couldn’t begrudge him that. 

She just missed him. 

“She is, isn’t she?” Steve grins, but sobers up quickly. “I didn’t really think about that. How lonely you must be, since…”

She’s already shaking her head. “It’s not your fault. I didn’t reach out.” 

“I didn’t exactly reach out either.”

They fall silent again, at a loss for words. Barb’s death, as always, the canyon between them. 

Finally Nancy huffs. “It’s both of our faults,” she declares, “or neither of our faults. I don’t know. I just missed you.”

“Well shit, Nance, I missed you too,” he says, touched. 

“I’ve heard you’re a pretty kickass friend too, you know,” she says, glancing at him. He smiles. 

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, Nancy Wheeler, I would be honored to be friends with you,” he says, and sticks out his hand to shake, like they’re meeting for the first time. 

She stares at him, and starts laughing. “You’re an idiot, Steve Harrington.”

She shakes his hand. 

Max has always felt like a mirror. One Nancy wanted to smash, pull her out of the shards of her reflective grief and hug. Stroke her hair the way she wanted someone to do for her and say you’ll get through this. So Max could hear it from someone who knows. 

Except Nancy doesn’t know anything. Still drowns in her guilt, the ball and chain dragging her into the depths. She can’t help when she’s still such a mess, three years later. 

Her hands clench when Mike says Max is pulling away from Lucas. She wishes she could look her in the eye and tell her you don’t have to be me. You can be better. 

She’s Mike’s friend. They barely know each other outside of a quick hello as they cross paths or fighting monsters. Max has enough on her plate, she doesn’t need her friend’s weird older sister butting in to tell her how to mourn the right way. 

Nancy just hopes she’s getting out of bed. Remembering to eat. Brushing her teeth. She had more cavities in the year after Barb died than she’d ever had in her life, and she knows Max doesn’t have insurance. 

Now, sitting next to Max’s hospital bed, Nancy wishes she’d reached out. 

With school back comes studying, and with studying comes Eddie Munson, in all his super-senior glory. Nancy is going to get him a diploma if it kills her. 

He laughs when she tells him so. “Shit, Wheeler,” he says. “The day something manages to get you is the day this shithole goes down for good.”

Robin turns down her offer to form a study group. “I’m pretty sure if I joined, I’d just distract Eddie, and let him distract me, and we’d end up throwing things at each other until you killed us. Sorry. Steve’s going to help me study for finals, though!”

She looks at Steve, eyebrow raised. She’s pretty sure it’s fair to be dubious, since she was the reason Steve passed his finals in the first place. 

“I’m her rubber duck,” he says as an explanation, and she nods in understanding. 

Her mom isn’t about to let her study alone with a boy in her room, though, and especially not a boy like Eddie, so she drags him to the library three times a week. He complains, he bitches, he tells her he doesn’t care about his fucking history class anymore. She just hands him a Rubik’s Cube she found to keep his hands busy as she quizzes him. 

Three sessions in, he slowly puts a worksheet down and screams into his hands. 

“Stop that!” She kicks him in the shin. “If you get me kicked out of the library I’m never forgiving you.”

“I can’t do it,” he says, staring up at the ceiling. “I’m so fucking stupid, Nancy. I can’t even get past question two. Is this torture? Did I die and go to hell? That would be fitting, wouldn’t it? Doomed to repeat high school for the rest of eternity?”

“Stupid” her ass. She knows what kind of work goes into those campaigns of his, has absently flipped through his annotated fantasy novels and left feeling as if she’d seen the story anew. Plus, she went and made a tape of everyone’s favorite songs, just in case, and she knew damn well how quickly he’d taught himself to play the song he did in the Upside-Down. “Stupid” and “Eddie Munson” don’t belong in the same sentence, much less belong in the same space in his brain. She hates Hawkins High just a little bit more for it. “Stop being dramatic. What are you stuck on?”

“Fucking nothing! I can’t focus, it’s driving me fucking insane. I keep trying, I swear, but it’s like I can’t even read anymore! This always happens, I swear to God it’s killing me more than the fucking demobats ever did.”

“Don’t joke about that,” she snaps. “You’re smart, Eddie, you know that. You just need to try.”

His face twists, and she realizes that was the wrong thing to say. 

“Oh, thank you, Miss Wheeler, why haven’t I thought of that? Sorry for wasting your time, I’ll get out of your perfect hair now—“

“Sit down,” she protests as he gathers up his stuff. “Eddie, I’ll help you work through the problem, okay? Just sit down, please.”

“No, Nancy!” He swings around, eyes wild. “It’s what everyone always says. Just sit still, stop doodling, be quiet, pay attention, try fucking harder…I tried, okay! I’ve been trying, I tried for fifteen fucking years, and I can’t do it! I might as well just drop out and get it over with. I’m fucking sick of this.”

“Okay!” She feels herself getting riled up. “You want to fail so bad, fine! I’m not your keeper, do whatever you want.”

“I will!”

“Fine!”

“Fine!”

They stare at each other, not moving. Finally Eddie storms off in a huff, flinging open the library door in a grand gesture she pretends not to see. There’s a sinking feeling in her stomach, but she can ignore it. 

She pretends not to notice when he comes slinking back five minutes later, shuffling his feet. 

“Sorry.”

“For what?” She asks primly, going over her notes. 

“Nancy, please.”

She sighs. “I’m sorry too. I’m just…frustrated.”

“I’ve been told I’m pretty frustrating,” he offers. 

“It’s not…”

“It is,” he says, sitting down. “It’s okay. God knows I piss myself off with this shit.”

She studies him, looking over his defeated face like he’s one of her flashcards. “You’re trying your best,” she says, sounding it out. She can’t really make sense of it. After all, trying her best has always been straight A’s, not stopping until she knew everything she needed to and more. 

“It’s not good enough.”

“It will be,” she says. “You’ve got me this time.”

“Listen, I know you’re trying to help—“

“Do you want fries?”

“What?” He blinks at her, shocked, as she starts packing up her things.  

“We’re not getting anywhere today. Sometimes you have to step back, and come back with a clearer head.” Usually she locks her door and cleans her guns, the repetitive motion soothing her mind until she can think again, but she has a feeling that won’t work for Eddie. 

“I usually just give up.”

“I don’t. Get your backpack, we’re going to the diner. Dinner’s on me tonight.”

At the diner, he makes her laugh so hard soda comes out her nose. The next day, they go to the library again. 

After a couple of days, he solves the cube. After three weeks, he nearly kicks her door down rushing to show her the B he got on a test. 

Two months later, he throws his cap into the air and his cane on the ground. Swings her around, both of them laughing. 

“Nancy fucking Wheeler!” He crows. “Achieving the impossible yet again!”

“Eddie, put me down!” She shrieks gleefully as he stumbles. She barely makes it back to solid ground before two more bodies are slamming into them, Steve and Robin whooping in their ears. 

It was weird, to see Steve and Robin effortlessly communicate the way she and Jonathan always had and have it be so unabashedly unromantic. She’d always thought that knowing someone like that was a sign you were meant to be, and they did it while still loudly proclaiming Platonic with a capital P. 

She and Jonathan didn’t do it much anymore. It was like dancing to a song that was always a beat off, syncing for just one moment before stumbling again, unsure that they were still allowed this. 

She’d known him better than anyone, once, and he’d known her the same. Now she wonders if that was ever true. 

“So,” Eddie says, throwing himself onto her bed. “Steve.”

She sits in her desk chair, raising an eyebrow. “What about him?”

“You broke up with Jonathan, right? Are you going to get back with him? I thought you would, but it's been months and neither of you said anything.”

“No,” she says. “No, that’s not what I want. It’s not what either of us want.”

“Really?” He rolls over, eyes searching. “What happened there, anyway? With both your boys. I’m a nosy little asshole, and I wanna hear it from you.”

It makes her laugh, the way he admits to it so freely. He grins wolfishly at her, baring his teeth in a grin. That’s probably why she tells him the truth. 

“I wasn’t okay, when I was with Steve,” she says honestly. “I was distant, grieving…I was a mess, and I stayed with him because I didn’t know what else to do. With Jonathan…I was getting closure, I was healing, and things were good between us. They were so good, but after a while, we just started to…deteriorate. I don’t know if we lost momentum, or if the stress just got to us, but we started fighting more and more,” She traces the desk with a finger, remembering the sour taste of Oliver Twist on her tongue. It was a shitty thing to say. “I thought we’d figured it out, for a little while, but then we just…stopped talking. I think, maybe if we’d talked more, we could have worked it out. But I’m…not upset that we didn’t, you know?”

It’s a different kind of loneliness when your partner won’t talk to you. It was different than grieving, different than not having anyone to talk to at all. Because even when she didn’t have friends, she had Jonathan. And then, slowly, she didn’t anymore. 

“Nancy, you’re one of my best friends, so-”

“Steve is your best friend.”

“Steve is my best best friend,” she agrees. “But he’s also more than that? Like, I think we’re literally soulmates. Platonic with a capital P soulmates, but, like, it feels like more than friendship sometimes? Like sometimes it’s like he can literally feel my bad days even when I haven’t talked to him yet. He told me once he just knows sometimes. It’s like I hit my hip on my desk and he felt it, but emotionally. It’s wild. It’s like the drugs literally combined our minds. Where was I going with this?”

“I don’t know,” she says, slightly bewildered. She wants to ask how they do that, but Robin barrels forward. 

“Right. So outside of mine and Steve’s platonic more-than-friendship, you’re kind of my best friend? And you’re, like, the coolest person I know.”

She blinks. She’s not sure she’s ever been described as cool before. 

After Barb, Nancy tried to cut her own hair. 

Her mom found her in the bathroom, unshed tears in her eyes and hair a mess on the sink and floor. 

She hadn’t laughed, hadn't said oh, honey, your beautiful hair. Just clucked her tongue and took the scissors from her hands. Stepped behind her and took over, took the uneven mess and made it something good, something presentable. 

She didn’t say anything until she was done, setting the scissors on the counter. “Sometimes,” she said, wetting her lips. “Sometimes we need a change, before we can move forward.”

The closer she gets to Emerson, the more she feels like she’s letting someone down. Mike. Max. Jonathan. All the people who have relied on her, all the people who trusted her to fight.

In a strange turn of events, her mom is the only one she doesn’t feel is disappointed in her. Her mom is more excited about college than she is sometimes. Chattering excitedly over dishes about the classes she’s going to take as Nancy dries and smiles and tries not to feel like the ground is being pulled from under her feet.

This is everything she’s ever wanted. Why does it feel so wrong?

She takes Eddie to the gun range, because having a gun in her hands has always made her feel safer. More in control. More like the badass protector she wants to be, than the scared little girl she feels sometimes. 

Eddie stares down the scope of the gun and shoots like he has experience, but doesn’t hit a single bullseye. 

“Your hands are shaking.”

“I’m in a fucking gun range and a bunch of small town hicks were hunting me not too long ago,” he snaps, taking another shot and missing the target completely. He swears and changes the magazine. “Excuse me if I’m a little bit on edge.” 

She hadn’t really thought of it like that. “You didn’t have to come,” she says. “I just thought with everything that’s happened, you should know how to use one. Just in case.”

“I know how to use a gun,” he rolls his eyes. 

“You know how to shoot one.” She looks from him to the target pointedly. “Not the same thing.”

“Deep. I could really feel the judgement there. Tell me, is there anything else wrong with me?”

“There’s security cameras all over this place. We’re not in Hawkins, so there’s no mob coming after you. I’m here, and I do know how to use a gun. No one is going to hurt you here.”

“I know all that.”

“Do you?”

He scowls at her. She looks back unflinchingly. She’s been here plenty of times, and the guys laughed at her until they didn’t anymore. By the time she brought Eddie, all she got was a raised eyebrow and a “boyfriend?” from Hunter at the desk. She didn’t know what was more incriminating, so she just shrugged. 

“You’re kind of a pain in the ass, you know that?”

She rolls her eyes, taking the gun from his hands and lining up a shot. “I’ve heard worse,” she says, thinking about Nancy Dre-ew, and Nancy “the slut” Wheeler, and priss, and shoots. It hits the bullseye. 

So do her next five shots. 

Eddie looks begrudgingly impressed when she reloads and hands the gun back to him. It’s more satisfying than it should be, to realize that while he’d known she had guns he’s never seen her actually shoot before. 

She raises a challenging eyebrow at him, and he huffs around a smile. “All right, all right,” he says good naturedly. “Let’s try this again.”

He does a little better this time around, now that he’s actually trying. He does a little dance when he hits one of the inner rings. 

“Take that!” He crows. “I bet Steve couldn’t do this. In your face, Harrington!”

“He’s much more of a close-combat kind of guy, isn’t he?” Nancy agrees. 

“Oh, yeah, definitely,” he says. “Does he really have a bat with nails?”

She blinks, caught off guard by the fact that Eddie hadn’t seen it. She never registered that he hadn’t used it during Vecna. Something about the fact seems weird somehow, as if it was as integral to Steve as his coiffed hair. “He keeps it in his trunk.”

“You and Byers need to update your Steve manuals. He said it’s under his bed now.”

“Ah,” Nancy says, thinking of all the times she’s slept with her pistol under her pillow. Empty, because she’s not stupid enough to sleep with a loaded gun when her little brother sometimes wakes her up after a nightmare, but the comforting weight of it alone makes it easier. 

“Just tell me one thing,” he says, widening his eyes imploringly at her. “Did he look as sexy as I think he did? Byers won’t give me a straight answer.”

It’s a joke, but his cheeks are a little pink. She’s not dumb, she’s seen the looks the two of them share, as if he and Steve were circling each other. Caught in a whirlpool, waiting for the moment the vortex would drag them down and they could finally touch. 

The looks between Eddie and Jonathan, too, that share a certain camaraderie she doesn’t entirely understand and at the same time understands all too well. Steve and Jonathan had always had a strange relationship, too close to not be friendship but not quite there. Surprisingly enough it was better after she and Steve broke up, Jonathan no longer avoiding them and the talk she’d forced the three of them into clearing the air. Sometimes, she’d wake up to Jonathan climbing into her bed, smelling of cigarettes and a hint of something stronger, and he’d tell her it was Steve who drove him there. 

She’s a journalist. It’s her job to notice things. She just wasn’t ready to confront that reality, where the two boys she’d wanted wanted each other as well. But she’s grown since then. 

She also knows that whoever Steve chooses, it won’t be easy. 

“You know,” she says, considering, “when we were dating, Steve never pressed me up against the wall or anything you’d expect from the King.”

Eddie gets this look on his face, caught between confusion and caught out. “…okay? Did you want him to do that or something? Are you trying to ask me to hint to him?”

“No,” she says. “I’m just saying, he never did any of that. It was kind of funny. He always made it so that he was the one pressed against the wall.”

Eddie misses the next five shots entirely, and she laughs at him through it all.

She’s hyper aware of touching other girls now. She didn’t used to be. Even with Robin, who is a lesbian and definitely won’t hate her. Who’s probably gone through the same thing. She can’t help it. 

What if they get the wrong idea? What if someone else sees? What if they can tell, what if they know, what if they hate me?

She hates feeling like this. She doesn’t know why it started, doesn’t know what’s wrong with her. She’s no stranger to casual affection—or at least she didn’t used to be. Why does it make her feel so tense now? It’s been years since she realized she liked girls, shouldn’t this have happened back then?

Deep down, she knows why. The Reagan sign in her front yard. Her dad sitting in his chair, the news always on. “Always that nasty disease, Karen, I swear some people are just asking for it.” She’s always known she could never tell him, but now she knows that if she gets sick he’ll say she deserves it. She doesn’t know what her mother thinks. She’s afraid to find out. 

She’s growing up, and her fear is growing with her. 

Objectively, Nancy knows she and Eddie don’t make sense. 

They’re not cut from the same cloth, like Steve and Robin. They don’t calm each other down, like Jonathan and Argyle. They’re too different, too alike in all the wrong ways, for them to get along. They’re both snappy, a little mean. Eddie’s dramatic enough to get on her nerves, and she’s prim enough to get on his. At their worst, they have earth shattering arguments that end in them not speaking to each other for days. 

When people see them walking down the street together, they whisper about “that nice girl Nancy Wheeler” and “that awful Munson boy.”

It’s not fair, never has been. Nancy hasn’t felt nice for a long time, maybe before Barb ever disappeared. Eddie isn’t always particularly nice either, but the court of public opinion takes it to extremes, twists him into something cruel instead of the kindness he carries under his leather armor. Someone to keep their children away from. It really is a shame, because Eddie loves kids in a way Nancy never has. She can see it in the way he interacts with them, his bright smile fading when a parent comes to drag them away. Even when he’s expecting it, his face falls, just for an instant, before spinning around with a grin that won’t reach his eyes. 

Nancy wants to take him out of here. There’s an offer on the tip of her tongue that she knows he’d refuse.

He’s not her brother, but he’s not…unlike one. It’s almost like talking to an older, flashier Mike. He’s annoying, is what he is. He picks at her, keeps pressing over the littlest things. Tries to get under her skin, succeeds, until she’s on the verge of stabbing him with her pencil. Looks triumphant whenever Robin has to grab her arm to drag her away, rambling an excuse about “some girl thing I totally forgot, yeah it’s an emergency,” while Steve drags him the other way to have bro time. 

“She loves it,” she’d heard Eddie crow delightedly once, when Robin didn’t get her out of hearing range fast enough. “Do you see that fire in her eyes?”

“Do I?” She asked Robin. “Love it?”

“I mean, far be it from me to tell you what you do and don’t like,” Robin answered. “But, uh, as far as I can tell, you totally love it. You look like you’re going to rip him to pieces and enjoy it, and he loves that. I didn’t think you’d be this much of a nightmare together, seriously, like, how are you two at each other’s throats one second and then best friends the next? Steve and I have debated locking you in a bathroom until you get along, but we’re kind of afraid you’ll kill each other.”

So no, Nancy and Eddie don’t get along. They’re kind of a nightmare together. They don’t make sense, and they don’t try to. They have other friends, who they get along with better, that they can seek out. 

But when Eddie knocks on her window, the only surprise is that he could even get there. 

“How?” She hisses, opening the window. He tumbles in, doesn’t even try to play off the utter gracelessness he’s displaying. 

“Wowie, I am never doing that again,” he breathes, flat on his back. “You’re going to have to help me down the stairs when I leave, had to leave my cane at the bottom and I cannot get back down that way.”

She doesn’t even want to know what he had to do to get up on her roof with his bad leg. “What are you doing here?”

“I’m but another lover, nothing but an ant in the face of your unwavering beauty, my queen,” he says, batting his eyes at her. The dramatics don’t hit the way he intends, given that he’s stuck on the floor. He holds a hand out pleadingly, and she rolls her eyes, hauling him up until she can get him to her bed. 

“Never mind.” She puts her hands on her hips, a gesture that is so obviously Steve she removes them immediately. From the glint in Eddie’s eyes, he notices.

She tries not to be jealous. She tries, she swears, but…

Three of the four (five? she doesn’t know what Argyle thinks of her) friends she has are dating each other. Two of them dated her, first. She can’t help but wonder, if she’d known that was an option, if everything would have been different. If she wouldn’t have this aching bitterness between her teeth. 

(Nothing would have changed, she knows. She’d been too desperate for other things. Trying so hard with Steve so her best friend didn’t die for nothing. Staying with Jonathan because he understood her more than anyone else, so maybe they didn’t need to talk. It wouldn’t have helped anything. She still wonders.)

It doesn’t matter. What’s past is past, and she needs to move forward. She can’t stop to think about could-have-beens, because thinking about boys is what got her into this mess in the first place. 

She closes her eyes, taking a shaky breath. That’s not fair. None of this is fair. None of it is fucking fair because Nancy stopped caring about fair when Barb died. 

She needs a drink. She needs a nap. She needs to stop feeling like Atlas with the world on her shoulders. 

She doesn’t do any of that. She calls Robin.

“Barb was my first kiss.”

“Really?”

“Yeah,” Nancy says, and keeps talking, because Barb is dead and Robin is a lesbian and she’s long forgotten what Barb’s favorite chapstick was back then. “We were seven, and I liked it but I didn’t know if I liked her. But I was convinced I was going to marry her, until my mom told me that girls don’t marry other girls. And I knew she liked girls when she died. She told me when we were fifteen, and I didn’t know the word bisexual but I knew I loved her and that was all that mattered. Not—not like that, not romantic, or maybe it was but it doesn’t matter because she was my best friend and I still love her but she’s gone forever. I loved her.”

She feels Robin lay a tentative hand on her back. 

“I had to look her parents in the eye and pretend. All those fucking NDA’s, I had to pretend there was hope. Pretend she was still missing. It was like everyone forgot about her except for me and them, and they sold their house to find their dead daughter and I wasn’t supposed to say anything and Steve kept reminding me about the fucking NDA’s—“

 “Nancy…”

“It’s my fault,” Nancy says, staring at the water. “I lumped in Steve, because it was easier than being alone. He didn’t know her like I did. She was worried about me. She stayed because she cared, and look where that got her.”

“That’s bullshit!” Robin’s eyes are wide, and she waves her hands around as she talks. “If it’s anyones fault, it’s those—those scientist guys experimenting on El! They knew there was a problem, and they tried to cover it up instead of making sure people were safe. You didn’t know it was dangerous. How were you supposed to know it was going to end up as anything other than normal teenage drama? None of this is supposed to be real, you didn’t know—“

“But I left her,” Nancy cuts in. “I left her alone to go lose my virginity to a boy she didn’t even like—“

“He was your boyfriend, it shouldn’t have mattered if she liked him—“

“It doesn’t matter!” Nancy shouts, and Robin falls silent, mouth still moving. “It doesn’t fucking matter how it happened, because it did and now she’s dead and she’s never coming back and it’s all my fault.”

Nancy is sick of crying. Sick of feeling helpless. Sick of not being able to change the past. 

“It’s not just Barb. I took Fred to the trailer park—he didn’t even want to be there, and now he’s dead. Eddie needs a cane, Max is almost completely blind and might never walk again and it was my plan that put them there. My plan that almost killed them. I’m responsible—“

“Fuck that.”

“Robin…”

“No, you listen to me, Nancy Wheeler,” Robin says, grabbing her by the shoulders. “You are one of the most remarkable people I have ever known. Max would have died without that plan. We all would have died. Venca-slash-Henry-slash-One would have won without that plan, and I am not going to sit here and listen to you blame yourself for saving lives. And-and Fred! Venca had already marked him, you know that. You couldn’t have done anything! And Barb is not your fault, okay? I-I-I know I can’t convince you, but I’ll say it as many times as it takes until you start believing it, because it’s true. You didn’t kill her. You didn’t kill anyone.”

“I killed Bruce,” she says, just to prove Robin wrong. And isn’t that shitty of her, to forget about him until she can use him to prove a point? She’s a fucking awful person.

“I don’t know who Bruce is, but given your track record I highly doubt that.”

“I bashed his head in with a fire extinguisher.”

Robin pauses, and Nancy’s stomach sinks. This is it, she thinks. This is what will convince her, this is what will make her see that I’m wrong, that I’m poison-

“What was he doing?”

“What?”

“Bruce. You had to have a reason for it. What was he doing?”

It’s like Robin doesn’t even care that Nancy just admitted to first degree murder. “He was flayed,” she admits, knowing Robin will take it as proof that she’s right.

“That’s not murder, that’s self defense,” Robin says, just like she knew she would. “Also, if he was flayed he was already dead. Sorry, I’m sticking to your side on this.”

“But I’m less torn up about killing my asshole coworker than I am about anything else. How does that not make me a monster?”

“He was already dead, Nancy!” Robin shakes her. “You’re not beating yourself up over it because you know he was already dead, a-a-and I know you’re using him to try and push me away and I won’t let you.”

“Robin…” she says, tears springing to her eyes. She’s so fucking sick of crying. So sick of the way she never seems to stop anymore. 

“Nancy,” Robin says. “None of us are going to leave you. Stop trying to make us.”

She pulls her into a hug, and Nancy sags into it, boneless. 

There, sandwiched between the sky and the water, Nancy starts to feel like she could forgive herself. 

“Nancy,” Steve says, putting a hand on her shoulder and ducking his chin to look her in the eye. “They won’t be alone.”

Tears well up, unbidden, at the way he seems to understand her now in a way he never did before. 

“I want this,” she insists. 

“I know you do,” he says. “Which is why you’re going to go out there, kick ass, and take names. We’ll be here, okay? We’ll keep an eye on them.”

“I know you will.” She swipes a hand across her eyes. “Can you talk to Holly, too? She gets lonely.”

Steve smiles. He’d always loved Holly, when they were dating. He used to braid her hair sometimes. Asked her about her drawings, her TV shows, listened to her talk with the same attentiveness Nancy’s father had never shown any of them. He’ll be a good dad, someday. To someone else’s children.

“I’ll talk to Holly,” he promises. “Does she still like princesses?”

“Ladybugs,” she says. “It’s ladybugs, now.”

“Ladybugs. I can do that. Black and red, and they’re all ladies. What’s not to like?”

“There are male ladybugs.”

“Wait, seriously?”

She laughs, tearfully, but they’re happy tears. Steve wipes them away gently, and she smiles at him to let him know she’s okay. “You’re an idiot, Steve Harrington.”

“You’re the best person I know, Nancy Wheeler,” he replies, achingly sincere. “You’re gonna have the whole world under your thumb, I just know it. Ever thought of running for President?”

“Can’t be worse than the one we have now,” she says, grimaces as her own joke lands too bitterly to be funny. She sees his jaw tighten before he forces himself to relax. 

“I’d vote for you.”

She grins at him, sharp to punch through the tension she’d made. “I’ll make Eddie my Vice President.”

“Oh, fuck no. You lost me,” he says, and Eddie makes an offended noise from where he’s stealing snacks from the glovebox. Jonathan swats him, and she smiles at him too. He smiles back, tentatively, and wanders to her side. 

“You gonna be okay up there?” He asks quietly. She can hear the guilt in it, still, and she reaches down to squeeze his hand. The one with the scar that matches hers, so their palms line up. It feels full circle, somehow, the three of them together like this. 

“I’ll be okay,” she confirms, and feels the truth of it in her chest. Her boys are here with her, the ones who have been there since the beginning. Eddie’s watching them fondly, munching on a granola bar. Robin is inside somewhere, rambling at her mother. Mike and Holly are probably still bickering over the last cupcake. She loves them so much, all of them. 

“Of course you will,” Steve says. “You’re Nancy fuckin’ Wheeler. Nothing stops you.”

She wants that to be true. She can feel in her bones that it will be. Eighteen has nothing on who she’ll be at thirty. 

She’s Nancy Wheeler, and the world won’t see her coming.