#i also think the life of chuck would make a beautiful movie

[thelifeofchuckmovie]

There are multiple Stephen King-centric stories to emerge from this past week pertaining to some anticipated upcoming Stephen King movies. And there was an update from writer/director Mike Flanagan regarding how his adaptation of The Dark Tower series is co-existing with his developing Exorcist movie.  

Not only has Flanagan been talking about The Dark Tower, but he’s made a couple of fantastic revelations about his new movie The Life Of Chuck (based on the Stephen King novella of the same name), and we have some major behind-the-scenes news regarding director Francis Lawrence’s The Long Walk, which has started production and added to its cast. The King Beat is here to catch you up on all of the developments. Let’s dig in!

Mike Flanagan’s Description Of Tom Hiddleston’s Big Dance Sequence In The Life Of Chuck Will Make You Want To See The Movie Immediately

Anyone who has read “The Life Of Chuck” has long known that dancing would be a crucial element of Mike Flanagan’s adaptation. After all, the middle section of the three-part story is entirely about an impromptu bit of body moving in public when the titular character gets caught up in the music being played by a busker. That being said, it’s nonetheless fascinating to learn how Flanagan is approaching the sequence in the adaptation – and based on his recent comments, it’s going to put broad smiles on the faces of anyone who watches it.

The most recent episode of the podcast Talking Scared features a number of professional storytellers discussing their favorite Stephen King short stories, and in the 30 minute interview with Mike Flanagan, the filmmaker goes into deep detail about the Life Of Chuck dance sequence. In the movie, Tom Hiddleston is playing the titular Chuck Krantz, and his performance is evidently so delightful that it actually left Flanagan’s face hurting from smiling too much. Said the writer/director,

It's one of those that you read it in a book where dancing is described. And I think King did a really good job with that. You read it in a script where dancing is described. But when you see it and hear it, and we're talking, it's a five-and-a-half minute scene. It's substantial... I've watched people when they watch this, and even people who have seen the movie dozens of times and worked on it... when we were on set filming, it took four days to shoot it, and my face hurt from smiling that long, that sustained, for four straight days. Like, my cheeks hurt by Friday. And, that's the thing I see, is you watch this smile break out over everybody who's, who's watching it.

This description of the sequence in the new film is exactly what one would hope for. The second section of the novella is all about celebrating the random joys of life, with Chuck finding himself caught up in the moment listening to music and finding a wonderful dance partner in a beautiful stranger who also happens to be walking by. It’s a sequence full of effervescence, and it sounds as though Mike Flanagan has worked particularly hard to capture it on screen.

The filmmaker also helped clarify why it is that the movie is earning comparisons to Frank Darabont’s The Shawshank Redemption – which is a film that can be described as an antidote to cynicism. Flanagan explained that his approach for The Life Of Chuck was to make the work sweet but not overbearing:

That joy comes in and it's not saccharine and it's not forced at all. It's kind of undeniably purely joyful. And there are so few opportunities in storytelling to exist in a moment utterly devoid of cynicism and not trying to force an emotional reaction where you're presenting something so purely what it is that the natural human response is to put down the guards and just let yourself be happy to experience it.

If that sounds like it is a very different mode for Mike Flanagan – a filmmaker best known for his work in the horror genre – you’re not wrong, and he said as much in the interview, adding,

I've never worked on anything that had that opportunity. I'm going the other way. I'm way more interested in making people uncomfortable and scared. [Laugh], you know? That's my whole business. And so to exist in a story that was just bringing forth this kind of earnest and bittersweet and realistic and honest joy and introspection. It's my favorite movie I've ever gotten to work on for that reason.

That’s a terrifically exciting sentiment given the extreme quality of Mike Flanagan’s filmography – but that’s not the only cool update that we have from him this week about his new Stephen King adaptation.

Mike Flanagan Reveals One Key Way The Life Of Chuck Will Differ From His Previous Stephen King Adaptations

Mike Flanagan’s love of Stephen King’s work is unquestionable, and it’s obviously reflected in his work. Gerald’s Game and Doctor Sleep feature details that are changed from their respective source material, but they are primarily very faithful adaptations. There is, however, one thing that the upcoming Life Of Chuck has that those two movies don’t, and that’s voice over narration that brings King’s words directly to the screen.

In the Talking Scared interview, Neil McRobert highlights a particularly beautiful passage from “The Life of Chuck” about the character reflecting on his impromptu dance while dying from cancer, and while discussing the material, Mike Flanagan explained how the film adaptation demanded that the prose being directly brought to the screen:

Frequently, when you look at things like that, the concept of narration in a movie, it's wildly improperly used, and it's a crutch in a lot of cases. It's unnecessary or it's distracting. This is one of the only times in my life where I looked at it and said, 'It is essential to this story that King's prose be driving and structuring the movie.' And I'm so glad that, that we did it that way. I don't want to spoil who narrates the film, but that's a big part of it. And having the right voice to these words is critical.

Continuing, he added that there is plenty in the story that is visually captivating in The Life Of Chuck, but that voice over narration was a necessary component in bringing it together. Said Flanagan,

It's a literary experience that has some incredible cinematic weight to it. It's visually incredible to watch the stars burn out or to watch a wonderfully classically choreographed dance number or two. All that is there. But then more than any other thing I've ever worked on, the prose was essential. And not just as a King fanatic, not just as a Constant Reader, but just for this particular story, it had to be there.

The Life Of Chuck is set to make its world premiere this fall at the Toronto International Film Festival, and being a completely independent production, it does not yet have theatrical distribution. Fingers are crossed that will change following its Canadian debut and that the movie will find its way to theaters before the end of the year.

[imyourbratzdoll]

Hey bubs, I have a request and I’m sorry it’s long 😅 Werebear! Ari x plus size reader🫶🏽

Maybe one day in there relationship she wakes up in a not so good mood about herself which causes her to be insecure for the day and throughout the day she sees girls flirting with ari and thought he flirted back.

Air takes notice of this and just plans for cute movie night, but reader is still not in a good mood so maybe they fight and they both says some hurtful things, nothingness reader and him both apologize and ari just showers her affection and reassurance that he’s only got eyes for her and no else and that he loves her 🥺 what do you think??

hello, don't apologise! okay, so this is my first plus size reader, and I hope you like it, but I would just like to say. no matter what you read in this story, this is not you. do not see yourself as disgusting, ugly, fat, etc. In real life, whether you have more flesh than someone else or less, you are beautiful inside and out. If you ever feel like what the reader feels, please find a friend you can talk to about this (I can be that friend!). but remember, no matter what you look like, you are gorgeous and if someone else doesn't see that. It means they aren't right for you. they aren't meant to be around a god/goddess like you. YOU ARE PERFECT! (also, I do get how it feels, I no longer trust my mind or people from it, haha.)

summary - reader wakes up feeling flawed, seeing everything wrong with their body. ari doesn't catch on as fast and accidentally makes you think he wants someone else. will the issue be resolved after a fight you two have?

warning - angst, insecure reader, nasty thoughts, sad reader and ari, mentions of cheating, fluff.

the gif I use isn’t mine, divider by @newlips

You look at yourself in the mirror, staring at the clump of flesh on your stomach, hips and thighs, frowning at the stretchmarks and how fat the skin looks as you switch angles, wondering why it looks worse the more you stare. Your eyes flit over to a photo of you and Ari, and the frown on your face deepens as you wonder how someone like him would want to be with someone like you. When you found out, Ari wasn’t human. You accepted him because you knew how it felt to be pushed aside for being or looking different, but you would never understand how he can look at you and see something he likes, not when there’s someone better out there for him.

As you hear Ari get closer to the room, you quickly chuck on the gorgeous sundress that he bought you. Still, no matter how pretty it was, whenever you looked in the mirror, the prettiness seemed to be sucked out of the dress, causing you to feel disgusted because you ruined something so gorgeous. 

When Ari entered the room, you put on your best fake smile, and when he wrapped his bulky arms around your chubby form, you tried to hide the grimace you felt, praying he couldn’t feel your rolls underneath. You meet his eyes as he leans down to place a kiss on your plump lips. His compliments go unnoticed as your ears are too busy ringing, your mind filled with horrible thoughts and feelings. 

“Are you ready to go, Tulip?” 

‘Go? Go where?’ You blink, slowly coming out of your haze as you try and think of where you guys are going.

“Remember, baby? You wanted to go to the markets and buy some fresh fruits for the pies you wanted to bake.”

‘Oh, why did I suggest something like that? I wasn’t in my right mind to suggest baking something that would make me fatter. Am I trying to make Ari run for the hills?’

You don’t remember how you got into the car, but you feel Ari resting his hand on your fat thigh, causing you to squirm because the longer his hand stays, the more he’ll become disgusted. Ari tries to talk to you, but you can’t seem to hear a word that comes out of his mouth. Everything seems like a blur once you get to the markets. Walking from one stall to another, picking up the freshest fruits you both can find, occasionally Ari would look at you and smile, kissing your cheek and holding you close to him, but that seemed to fly over your head. 

How other women seemed to look at the two of you didn't fly over your head. They’d flirt with Ari as if you weren’t standing right next to him, wrapped up in his arms. Your eyes glazed over for a split second when you heard Ari respond to them. Deep down, you knew he was being nice, that he’d never look, think or flirt with another woman because Ari deeply loved you. Still, for some reason, you thought he was flirting back. You’ve never seen that smile on him before.

‘Why was he looking at her like that? Did he like how thin she was? That she didn’t have so many rolls or flesh? Did he like how she could fill her sundress perfectly? Did Ari want her instead?’ You don’t notice Ari dismissing the woman’s flirtations or that he looks down at you with concern. Because why would you? You’re so lost in your head that your mind and reality are merging.

Ari pulls you closer to him, his hand coming up to stroke your puffy cheeks. “Hey, Tulip. You with me?” 

You blink, and your eyes slowly move up. You nod because your throat feels too dry for you to speak. Ari nods even though he’s unsure about how you're feeling. You both begin to leave the markets, and throughout the day, it’s a repeat, women flirt. You think Ari is flirting back, and you hate yourself and your body because maybe if you looked like one of those models. You’d be able to keep a man.

You are so spaced out that you don’t notice Ari grabbing your favourite snacks, nor do you see that when you get home, he sets up the lounge room for movie night. Putting on your favourite horror movie because he knows you prefer horror over romance.

While he’s busy setting up something that will hopefully make you feel better, you change into a pair of trackies, and just as you pull on one of his shirts, Ari walks in with a big smile, his eyes moving up and down your body causing you to squirm. 

“What?!” You snap, not wanting him to have the time to judge how ugly you really are, and your arms come around to hug yourself.

Ari’s hands fly up, “Woah, what’s with the attitude, Tulip?” He frowns when you glare, not understanding why you’ve been off today. “What’s wrong with you? Talk to me.” He slowly moves forward.

“What’s wrong with me?! What’s wrong with me!? Like you don’t know! I saw how you looked at those women! I saw how wanted them!” You screamed, desperately holding back the tears because you don’t want to add weakness to the pile of things wrong with you. 

Ari’s brows furrow, beginning to feel irritated with your insecurities. “Tulip, you know damn well that I didn’t flirt with those women! You know that I don’t want them, no matter how fucking skinny they look!” He growls, and his nose twitches in anger. Ari’s eyes move down your form. In his mind, he doesn’t see you as anything but beautiful. But that’s not how you see his look. All you see is disgust, and your heart clenches.

“Bullshit! Why the fuck should I believe you?! All you do is lie to me! I’ve seen you go after them when you think I’m not looking! You don’t think I don’t notice that you don’t touch me when you shift! When you need someone to mate with, but you leave instead!” Your hands tangled into your hair as you scream, tears building up as you think of those lonely nights when you look down at yourself and wish you could just cut the skin off. Because then maybe he’d pick you, perhaps he’d want you as his mate.

“Are you fucking serious!?” Ari growls, stalking forward until his large form towers over your shivering one. “You think I’d fucking go out and cheat on you?! You think the whole time I chased you, trying to prove that I wanted you was all for nothing?! Why the fuck would I waste my time with you if I wanted someone skinnier, someone with fewer fucking problems?! Do you not see that I don’t mate with you because I could fucking hurt you!” He roars, eyes glazed over with fury. His anger is more aimed at himself for not seeing how much you were hurting.

‘Skinner, fewer problems, waste of time, don’t want to mate with you, cheat.’ These words ring in your head, and your heart clenches as it all becomes too much. You look up at Ari with tears in your eyes, and your fists pound on his chest. “I hate you! I hate you!” Both hearts break as tears begin to roll down both of your faces. Ari quickly pulls you into his arms, wrapping you securely against him as he strokes your head.

“Oh, Tulip. I’m so fucking sorry. You’re my goddess, and I love you so much.” Ari’s voice cracks, and his eyes close as he basks in the feel of holding you in his arms, letting out a sigh of relief as you sink into his hold. 

“I’m so sorry, Bear! I’m sorry. Please forgive me! I don’t hate you. I love you so much.” You bury your face into his chest, and your tears soak his shirt as your sobs fill the room. You felt lucky that you had someone like Ari in your life. 

Ari pulls away and kneels on the ground, placing loving kisses all over your stomach, hips and thighs, showing how much he loves your body, proving he’s unbothered by your insecurities and that he only sees it as perfection. Ari looks up at you and pouts. “There’s nothing I’ll find more beautiful in this world than you, Tulip. Not the sun. Not the moon. Not even the entire galaxy compares to the light you radiate wherever you go.” Your breath hitches from his words, feeling your cracked heart begin to heal.

You reach down and stroke his cheek, watching his eyes flutter closed, a soft breath leaving him at your gentle touch. “Thank you, Bear. I’m so sorry that I’ve been such a mess, and there’s no other man I’d love not when I have you.” Ari stands at full height, and a squeal escapes your mouth as he lifts you like you weigh nothing, carrying you into the lounge room where everything is set up.

The moment he lies you down and holds you against him is when your eyes begin to flutter closed from his sweet woodsy scent and warmth, feeling safe and secure in the arms of the man you love and who loves you.

thank you for reading!

feedback and reblogs are greatly appreciated.

[c-rose2081]

AGDUSHFUEBDHDHD YOUR RECENT FIC WAS SO FUCKING GOOD LIKE AGHHHHHH

Bridget being such a sweet and caring liek cutie pie. Thinking Chloe might have a fear of blood or something is so adorable. And honestly now I’m just chucking every available fear or weakness Headcanon onto Chloe like she’s shopping cart of angst. Cause yeah Chloe def would have a fear of blood despite her ironic love of swords and shields.

God I knew it all along but somehow it wasn’t even fucking hitting me that Chloe in the movie migrates to her mom not only cause it’s her mom, but it’s her MOM. Her mom who’s DEAD. She’s seeing her mom ALIVE in some way and that must be so fucking conflicting to her and for Ella to have been so cold to her must have been mind breakingly painful. Cause fuck. I totally get the morally gray Ella vibes but Ella’s attitude towards Chloe the whole time was honestly just rude. Like saying that she doesn’t deserve her shoes just cause it was a good thing? Like no that’s not the point at all. The point should have been thag rewards like that are a privilege. And that assuming others have that isn’t good. Not that being rewarded for good behavior WITHOUT EXPECTING IT somehow makes you some prissy uptight monster. Like ugh I could rant about that forever I think they handled that HORRIBLY. Like they’re really trying to make Chloe look like she worked for nothing and just expects lavish gifts. Like NO?! She’s getting straight As. Working herself to the bone for swords and shields. And yes we should all just normally strive to it, but being a good person takes fucking work. Being nice and honorable and kind to all has so much strength! These are all amazing things and it’s not a bad thing at all Chloe was rewarded for it. She worked hard for all of it. It’s the assumption that everyone else’s life is similar and that their is no grey area that’s the bad part. That’s what I wish they focused on.

Anywhoooo. Chloe being rejected AND seeing the blood on her hand must have been so fucking painful. I mean it’s nearly like a graphic symbol of her mom being so brutally decapitated. And Ella with that mother line like GOD. Chloe must feel so damn alone. And I definitely think they overlooked how emotional she should be. Like they needed to incorporate the breakdown you just wrote.

and lordy it must be so fucking painful cause in a cruel twist of irony, the person who decapitated her mom is the one comforting her. The one soothing her and hugging her and taking care of her. Acting so motherly in her own way it must make Chloe miss her own mom even MORE. And any comfort from Bridget must be so damn conflicting cause she’s the enemy. But no one else is comforting her so she’ll take it. Ugh beautiful masterpiece.

LOL and of course I’m a die hard bridgella fan so it’s so fun to see more Bridget and Ella interacting. Like YES Ella stops as soon as she realized she snapped at her precious angel Bridget. YES Bridget is the only one able to get through to Ella when she’s going through something. Yes after Ella apologizes Bridget gives her a kiss and they go snuggle together. Wait huh-

anyway. Adored this fic entirely. I’m vaguely curious to see Ella’s apology now honestly. And I’m also wondering where tf red went. Like girly just disappeared without checking on Chloe 😭

Thank you for reading I’m so glad you enjoyed! I love writing angst so much, especially around Chloe and the lack of grief from Chloe’s end really bugged me in the film.

I’m not sure if I’ll actually write Ella’s apology or not? And as for Red, I actually have an idea about that. She probably goes to break down herself somewhere, cause naturally RED knows fully well how painful it is for Chloe to get rejected by her own mother, because it’s partly her fault Cinderella’s dead. She doesn’t go to comfort Chloe cause I imagine this happens right after they arrive? Like, they hardly know one another yet so they aren’t actually ‘friends’ yet.

Anyway, thanks so much for this! I always love hearing what you have to say 😊

[mystic-writings]

remember the nights | chapter eleven — o, atlas, pt. i

WORD COUNT — 2,154

WARNINGS — angst, depression

NOTES — god this chapter just. ugh. (also sorry for the late post i forgot to queue it last night)

previous chapter | masterlist | next chapter

You haven’t been able to look Thomas in the eye for almost a month.

It’s been just a few days short of three weeks, and you were finally in the classic, snowy December that you’d waited all year for. The snow had begun to fall the day after the party and had let up very little since, as though the weather was linked to your mood. 

Before you’d moved, you wondered exactly what Woodstock would look like during the holiday season — covered in snow, twinkling under the moonlight and lit up in color with decorations on every house. You were correct, of course, and despite its beauty, you didn’t have the energy nor the emotion to properly admire the town for all the beauty it displayed under the constant cover of snow. 

While the morning of the first snow was hard, it hadn’t gotten any better. You woke up that morning and went through your usual motions, the ache in your chest feeling like a gaping void that swallowed up all of your happiness. Your first decision that day was to let it consume you, but after you cried all over again after folding up Newt’s jacket and tucking it away in your closet, you knew that feeling it all the time would only make things worse for you. Especially when you realized that if Newt was serious about what he said, it was almost a certainty that the jacket would never leave its place in your closet. 

After that, a constant cold — and even colder silence — seemed to blanket the house in the same way the snow did. Because not only could you not look Thomas in the eye without feeling a surge of anger, but you couldn’t stand speaking to him, either. For the first few days, he tried his best to talk to you, to explain himself, but once he realized you were serious about not talking to him anymore, he gave up. 

Maggie and your dad seemed okay, and you were thankful that their relationship wasn’t as altered by the change in yours and Thomas’, but the concern that rolled off of them in waves when you were in their presence was so strong that you could barely be around them, too. 

Chuck was the only person who didn’t treat you any differently than he did before. He still persisted, inviting you into his room to play video games or watching movies on your laptop in your room. He was an entirely welcome presence in your life, and a very welcome distraction to whatever thoughts were lingering in your mind. The silence within the house was growing to be suffocating, and if it weren’t for Chuck, you wouldn’t know what to do with yourself. He was the only person in the world right now who didn’t look at you with that gleam of pity in his eyes, and for that, you were thankful. 

You did your best to ignore the lingering thoughts in your mind. Thinking about what happened — and all the possibilities of what was happening to everyone else after, or what else could have happened instead — just made that aching void worse. Because the group that had once welcomed you with open arms, the one that had so quickly become your family, was shattered. And it was partly your fault. 

Thomas and Teresa stuck with one another, that much was expected. Newt, as he’d said, wandered off on his own, opting to spend all his free time with Frypan. Brenda, though, was determined to not leave your side. She had been one of the many front row witnesses at the party, and had reminded you several times that she believes both boys were at fault and overreacted, whereas you didn’t deserve any of what happened. 

Minho and Gally, ever the peacekeepers, had spent the past few weeks on a rotating schedule of spending their time with each of you separately. Sonya and Harriet did the same every so often, but aside from Sonya coming over every once in a while and reminding you that she was on your side, they had gone off on their own, too. 

You stopped sitting beside Newt in chemistry class. Brenda had forced Clint, the boy who used to be her lab partner, to switch seats with you. It gave you a little peace of mind, sitting across the classroom from him. But it made the ache worse, too. You still saw him at his locker every day, though. And there was no way you could get around that. 

Despite the sudden temperature drop, you stopped going to school with Thomas and Teresa. You’d either walk, occasionally take your dad’s car, or ride with Brenda on the days she risked driving her beat up, barely road safe, 90s Dodge Neon to school — without snow tires. Anything was better than stewing in the obvious tension between the three of you.

Everything felt like too much. You could barely manage with the aching pressure of your emotions, of processing and living with what happened — but lately, you were being pressured into college applications, figuring out what you wanted to do for your entire future, and it was all too much to handle. 

At first, Brenda tried taking you to Mickey’s one Friday evening to see if it would help to take your mind off things, but you could barely stomach walking through the door. Frypan spotted you through the order window, and you saw the pity flash through his eyes — and within seconds, Newt had walked out of the bathroom, and you knew you wouldn’t be stepping foot back in the diner anytime soon. You were just lucky enough that he didn’t see you before you left, because you wouldn’t have known what to do if he did. 

She’d ordered it for you once, too, a few days after that evening. You appreciated that she was trying, but no matter how much you wanted it to work, it didn’t. The bitter taste of regret burned your throat as you swallowed each bite, and it reminded you of Newt, of the willow tree and how you were able to trust him so quickly to tell him about your childhood, and him to do the same. 

All it did was remind you of how Newt was the first person you were able to talk about your mom to since Amina and Fernanda. About how you told him things you hadn’t even told them. 

With every day that passed, you wished more and more that you could get rid of every painful reminder — which seemed to be embedded in everything that surrounded you, into the very fiber of your being — and to get over it. But you couldn’t. You wanted desperately to move back to the city, to the floor-to-ceiling windows you grew up with. To have sleepovers with Amina and Fernanda again, to eat frozen yogurt with them and throw pieces of pizza to the pigeons in the park again. To go back to before you ever crossed Woodstock’s town line, so you could forget you ever knew the boy called Newt. 

So you could relieve yourself of the constant heartache. 

But, like most things in life, there was nothing you could do to change how things were now, let alone go back to when things were better. All you could do was live with it, bear the pain and hope that, someday, you could let go of it, or forget about it. That you could get back to how things used to be, or build a new version of it, at least. 

Sitting at the kitchen table, in the dead of morning, you appreciated the quiet that settled over the house. It was different to the suffocating blanket that covered everyone during meals; it was peaceful. 

You were wide awake despite it being dawn on a Saturday, but you just couldn’t sleep. With your laptop and an ocean of papers in front of you, you decided it was the perfect time to drown in college applications. 

Even though you were entirely clueless on what you wanted to do with your life after high school, you were sure that college applications were a must. It was the one thing that was enforced constantly throughout your time at school, so they had to be important, right? Besides, you could always figure out what to do after you got accepted somewhere, right?

You lifted your ballerina mug — practically filled to the brim with coffee — to your lips as the sound of feet shuffling down the stairs caught your attention. Looking over your shoulder, you spotted your dad turning from the stairs into the kitchen, sporting some of the worst bedhead you’d ever seen. 

“Whatcha doin’?” He asked, voice gravelly from lack of use. 

You sighed, looking back at the ominous spread of papers and glaringly bright computer screen. “College applications,”

Your dad nodded and came to stand at your right side, now holding his own cup of coffee. “Where were you thinking of going?”

“Not sure anymore,” you shrugged, picking up a piece of paper and skimming over it. “Maybe Syracuse? They’ve got good programs.” 

“I thought your friends—the girls, I mean—were gonna go to NYU together? What about that?”

“That was when I could do everything from the condo, and I didn’t have to worry about paying for accommodation.” You told him. “But that doesn’t really matter anymore, since I’d have to pay for some sort of dormitory no matter where I go, now.” 

Your dad took a sip of his coffee before placing a hand on your shoulder, giving it a reassuring squeeze. “Don’t worry about any of that, kiddo. We can cover it no matter where you go, okay? Hell, if you wanna run off to Australia for school, we can cover that, too. Just pick somewhere that you’re gonna enjoy, okay? Do what makes you happy.” 

You smiled and looked up at your dad, ignoring the slight build of tears along your waterline. “Thanks, dad.” 

“Don’t worry, kiddo. We’ve got this.” He pressed a kiss to the top of your head, squeezed your shoulder one last time, and headed to his office to finish up some of the projects he’d been working on. 

Even with Brenda at your side at practically every hour of the day, making dozens of attempts to distract you with whatever came to her mind, school never felt as lonely as it did now. Everyone else still ate their lunches in the cafeteria, but you and Brenda started eating in the computer lab with some of her more casual friends. Thomas and Teresa still took their spots at the main table, but Newt and Frypan began occupying a small corner space by the windows. 

You’d stopped participating in all of your classes almost immediately after the party, and you were sure that word of what happened had gotten to everyone in the school by now — and what little amount of people didn’t know could likely see that something was wrong — but you didn’t have enough energy left at the end of the day to care that much about it. 

You were lucky in your old school, with class sizes large enough and teachers stretched thin enough that not participating was something you were easily able to get away with if you wanted to, but in a school this small, you were practically out in the open. Your teachers were forgiving enough to let you keep your head down most of the time, except for Mr. Henley. It seemed that his failing marriage made him apathetic to everything in the universe, and utterly horrible at his job. 

It all just felt like too much. Everything took too much effort, too much energy. Energy you just didn’t seem to have, even if you have been sleeping ten hours every night. 

You didn’t even have enough energy to focus on doing your homework anymore. Instead, you’d opted for clearing the snow off the roof in front of your window sitting there for hours every single night, staring up at the night sky until your fingers went numb and dried tears made your cheeks feel like ice. 

But every time you came back inside, you passed by your desk and everything on it. The wall behind it, covered with Fernanda’s drawings, sticky notes scrawled with reminders from months ago, and the photo strip from the mall. 

You could barely stand to look at it. 

No matter what you did, somehow, everything around you had become a reminder. A reminder of what you had, of what you lost, and of what could’ve been. And every time you remembered, it felt like you’d become Atlas, bearing the weight of the world, of a thousand mistakes that you didn’t even make, on your tired, aching shoulders. 

And there was nothing you wouldn’t give to let someone else take over.

series taglist: @heliads @ghostofscarley @badbatch-simp24 @virginia-peters @third-broparcelicito @lamolaine @yes-fangirl-things (open!)

[seasidesandstarscapes]

Writer's Tag Game

Tagged by @strangethings-everywhere & @effervescentyellow !!! finally catching up on tag games ;^_^

Rules: Answer some or all of the questions below. Tag your fellow writers. Enjoy!

Link to your masterlist: Lol i'm too lazy to make one, but my ao3 is pretty kept up to date!!!

Favorite and least favorite genres to write (angst/smut/fluff, etc): Favorite is probably Angst with a Happy Ending or Smut With Feelings. Love when the couple figures out just how much they love each other. I can never write Major Character Death tho. Or the times I have, it's been such a struggle;;;;

Favorite characters to write for? Right now it's been Don just because I think I relate to him in a lot of ways. Though Chuck and Roger have been fun!! trying to figure out their dynamics :d

Which one of your works is your favorite? I guess right now it's....the Hockey AU?? The response to it has been so wonderful and the story became so much more than I ever imagined it would be!!!

Which one of your works is more popular than you thought it would be? The Hockey Fic!!! I was worried I was smashing too many things into one fic, but it seems to have worked in the end??? and i keep getting more and more inspo to write for more of this AU which is so so good (thank you @sparrow-in-the-field >3<)

Which one of your works is less popular than you thought it would be? Idk??? just getting one hit on my stories astounds me so i'm never upset when something doesn't get as much attention as the others ajfskdslfs

Which one of your fics was hardest to write? Why? Definitely my Sci-Fi AU that i've yet to share. It's a labour of love and i just want it to be perfect for the fandom but also i've edited and reread it so many times i'm so worried it's not good anymore and ghfdjsfkslfsk

What is your favorite fanfic by someone else? THE TOUGHEST QUESTION CAUSE EVERYONE IN THE FANDOM IS SUCH AN AMAZING WRITER let me make a list under a readmore ahgdfjksl

@sparrow-in-the-field 's Quiet Act is ESSENTIAL for anyone in tbitb fandom, it has it all, the pining, the fluff, the angst, the perfect movie references, ugghhgfjdkl it's beautiful and such a good fic to start with if you're not sure where to begin with reading tbitb stuff

@teaforarteza 's On The Border gave me my first "oh. OH" at how perfect Bobby and Don are for each other, plus it's so hot and tender all at once HOW i have definitely had to reread and comment more than once just for my thoughts to catch up aghdfjsk

@arokel 's Light the Kindling is so much fun because we get to meet Percy who I'll protect with my life and we get such soft moments with Don and Bobby that also turn hot and sexy but still so filled with emotion ahhghgjdfskl

@kjxlll 's (getsalami on ao3) Hands, Tears, and Glory has me chomping at the bit every time I reread it. Anonymous sex that turns out "oh shit it's YOU" has a chokehold on me and godddd Bobby gets destroyed in so many delicious ways

@shadowquill17 's hands and voices makes me so weepy and soft and it's just so lovely and beautiful to have a glimpse of our boys after the olympics, when Bobby's assistant coach and he and Don are just so incredibly in love ahhhh

@thesummerpetsalamander 's (pavlovsfrog on ao3) The Sweetest Sounds is another hot one that also had me giggling and kicking my feet. Don and Bobby are so much fun in this modern AU and it's like hffjdsklfsd man oh man

@icegreyrose 's You Have But Slumber'd Here is so so good, I love magic realism and this story just pulls you in, always has a twist that shocks you in the best way and it's so cool and ahhghfjdk

@effervescentyellow 's Oh, But Honey had me in TEARS god so beautiful, it was nostalgic, relatable and just really digs in and nestles into your soul, i'm a constant puddle when I remember it

@kcsplace 's (CaseyStar on ao3) We'll Stay As We Are is gorgeous omgggg I was holding my breath, I was filled with heartache and love all at once, I was worried and reassured all at once, very cathartic if you need to get some emotions out

@dogwooddiaries 's (breakingofdawn on ao3) Undo Me IS AN AMAZING ROLLER COASTER you want a one night stand that turns into something more??? a friendship turned to love??? both Bobby and Don no longer able to deny their feelings for each other???? you got it all in one incredible fic

@borealopelta 's (zargothoraxcore on ao3) it always leads you to my hometown is heart-wrenching and hot and soft and devastating. You want the best and worst time (affectionate) of your life???? read this fic asap and cry with me

@strangethings-everywhere 's (booknerds_unite on ao3) When Our Fingers Touch, I Feel My Way Back Home IS ANOTHER ESSENTIAL FOR TBITB FANS tragic and heartwarming, it'll destroy you and lift you above mountains. And if you're a ww2 buff like me, it makes it all that more emotional and clawing at the ground as your heart bleeds

@crushribbons MY LOVE her xReader and xOFC fics are so much fun!!! i'll admit i've never been a fan of reader/ofc but Laney changed that for me just because her takes are so unique from what I've seen in the past??? Her stories make me laugh, make me emotional, ugghgh like if she can make me a changed man, then you KNOW it's good

of course i can't not mention @savvylittlecoxswain who has been our plethora of information regarding our boys, sharing all these fun facts and details the movie should've taken into account smh ALSO Olie has a wing fic in the works that I am SO EXCITED FOR YOU HAVE NO IDEA

Also please check out FreyasDaughter's From Berlin, With Love because that one is such a good instrospective take on the events in Berlin, a completely different writing style that's so cool, and Joe being the best boyfriend to Joyce I swear its ahhhh

fishyies is another great fic writer who's really tugged at the heartstrings , very real and raw and just makes you take a step back and breath

basically all this to say we have so many good fic writes in tbitb fandom and just choosing one fic is so hard because everyone's style is so unique and fun and amazing and i love you all ;v;

[anhed-nia]

I was delighted to learn that there was a crazy-girl Black Swan movie from before BLACK SWAN, and disappointed that it's exactly as mysogynistic, just in a much dumber way. We're all familiar with the John Hughes model of romance, in which girls who reject you just want you to be increasingly persistent and controlling--but there's a sort of kid brother to this framework, that says that when women reject you it's actually because they're literally fucking insane, and they need your help with that. In the movie ETOILE aka BALLET, Jennifer Connelly aka the most beautiful woman in the universe plays a ballerina whose psychotic obsession with Swan Lake interferes with her non-relationship with some little dweeb who decides he's entitled to her. The guy looks and kind of acts like the wormy new wave guy Chuck in RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD (fig. 1), but in ROTLD that used car salesman suit is a joke so I don't know what the makers of ETOILE think I'm supposed to feel when I look at this asshole (fig. 2). Something positive, apparently. It's funny, in my life I live firmly in the Ugly Girl camp and I have all the usual neuroses about it, but certain situations unlock this protectiveness about beautiful women--case in point, watching this jerk kiss Jennifer Connelly. I mean if he were like Bud Cort or someone with that Funny Valentine quality, who is warm and charming, then it would be fine, but with this low-end cretin it's really like...sir, please back away from Jennifer Connelly. This is not for you.

In this movie Jennifer Connelly is frankly way too good for this guy, and if this were real life, it would make perfect sense that she's polite to him and then gives him the brush-off when he pushes his luck; but of course, in the fantasy world of this movie, the reason she rejects him is that she's fucking possessed or something and she's just waiting for him to rescue her from her feminine irrationality. This is extra funny because the script itself directly references the myth of Apollo and Daphne which is like the original version of this: Daphne just wants to be left alone, but Apollo assumes his advances are desirable no matter what she has to say about it; to get away from him she transforms into a tree, and he's so sad about it that he desecrates her corpse weaves a wreath from her leaves. This is really the ultimate reflection of a man refusing to believe that a particular hot chick really, genuinely doesn't want him, but ETOILE isn't capable of figuring out that subtext, so the guy just forces himself on Jennifer Connelly until she isn't "crazy" anymore. Bonus points for the scene where he repeatedly screams at her to stop dancing, because there's really no bigger threat to romance than a woman's career and personal interests.

I wish I could think of more examples of this trope, I know they're out there, and I did just see another one called FEMME FATALE where Lisa Zane marries Colin Firth and then "mysteriously" leaves him, so he has to go on this whole odyssey to retrieve her. This is a particularly funny example because Firth is mopey and boring and untalented and a bad listener and out of shape and a drag, and Zane is this turbulent sexpot who is making it really obvious that she's not satisfied with him right up to the point that she "strangely" vanishes. Spoilers ahead I guess but the first thing Firth finds out is that she was in some psychotic art film by a militant lesbian who she used to date...and still the spurned husband thinks, nah, it CAN'T be that I'm boring and sappy and self-centered and I ignore her needs, and it ALSO CAN'T be that maybe she secretly prefers girls or is, at the very least, way more sexually exotic than I am. There has to be some OTHER reason I got dumped, something that involves me pursuing this uninterested woman to the ends of the earth and forcing her to admit that she loves only me, forever. And the movie totally agrees with him: There's no moment where Colin Firth realizes that he misread all the evidence, or even that she's EVIL or just not who he thought she was or whatever. Instead what he finds out is that she's literally insane! She's a paranoid schizophrenic whose only valid choices of companion are her dad or, you guessed it, Colin Firth. When I saw this I thought wow, this movie has gone impossibly far out of its way to explain that when a woman rejects you, it's not because you're a dullard and a jerk, it's because she's dangerously crazy. Only an actual lunatic would turn down a catch like YOU.

Anyway I know I was just talking about not being pointlessly mean about movies in public, but all bets are off if the movie manages to say something this insulting. I am now done talking about this and I will leave you with this hilarious thumbnail from a YouTube clip of FEMME FATALE, which pretty well sums up the whole movie.

[driftwithme]

Right now I'm kinda sick which means I have no brainpower to talk about this properly or at least how I want to.

Subject at hand: Mako, Chuck and Raleigh all had an specific item in the movie that kinda explains or contains them as characters.

Mako and her relationship with swords is the obvious example. If you'll permit me to call it her motif, then let that be it. For the sake of storytelling, Mako is given an object that is the summary of her struggles and dreams, of her traumas and her hope. Swords are part of her heritage, given that his dad dedicated his life to making them. An item capable of both great damage and impossible beauty, the movie even adapts it to be more like the girl itself: chainswords that stay hidden and silently away for their turn to strike, capable of flexibility and quick adaptation, they are almost unbreakable, used to support others in need, cut straight through the heart of the enemy and provide a sure win even under great underwater pressure or up in the sky.

Mako is the girl welding the sword and she's the one crafting the sword from scratch designing it and she's the sword itself, okay?

Mako's a weapon in the context of she being a soldier. She's deadly, trained to kill, efficient with a perfect score in combat simulations, one of the brightest in the Jaeger Program. But she is also a craft in the sense of being someone intricate, because her story is way more complex than people imagine. She is beautiful as a woman, delicate in her ways of treating others, elegant in her movements...

In this case, the objectification serves a more artistic purpose. Whenever you think of the chainsword, you think of Mako and the other way around. Her scene killing Otachi in the name of her family is her breakthrough in the movie, where she achieves her dream/goal, when all she has gone through pays off. Then the scene where she uses the chainsword to oin Slattern to G. Danger is the culmination of her arc to say so: now she will kill the Kaiju that killed her adoptive father and will finally put an end of the apocalypse.

Without having to make it explicit in the film, you know that Mako gave those chainswords to G. Danger during the restoration program hoping that it'd be somehow her jaeger, that she'd finally become a ranger piloting it, etc.

Now, I said something similar can be found looking at the depiction of both Chuck and Raleigh in the movie. That's because, to me at least, the narrative does something similar in Chuck-Max and Raleigh-his photographs.

Raleigh is our narrator, our protagonist, we see the world through his eyes. I guess the thesis hear is that Raleigh is the man behind the camera, guiding our perception of this fictional world. Photographs can be intimate, int he way they reveal the interest of the one taking them. In sharing with us the concept of Raleigh having photography as his hobby, the story reveals us a man oriented to details and sensitive to the art of framing an instant, telling a story in one snap.

It also tells just how sentimental he is, how much he loved his home, his brother, 'cause he was surviving with rations at the end of the world but wherever he traveled, he took his pictures with him, put them on the walls of his residency. He's then a man who likes to take a look at the past. He said it himself: he spent 5 years on the past, never thinking of how the future would be. Nostalgic or even melancholic, but ultimately willing to make new good and bad memories and capture them for posterity. Loyal, down to earth in the sense that he knows where he came and what made him the way he is, sensible and patient, likes walking around cities or touring maybe, which is interesting really. For all the cocky American dream of a man the movie suggests he was, he didn't have posters of action movies or pics of him in fights or any of that. He had pics of architecture, nice tiny shots that suggest calmness, a steady hand and a more passive spirit. It really matches Mako Mori in that sense.

I could dive more into the subjects of how his photographs characterize Raleigh Becket, but I'm not lying when I say I'm feeling sick and my brain is kinda foggy.

I'll close this post talking about Chuck and his relationship with Max instead.

One of the first things I noticed on my last rewatch is just how many times Chuck and Max are practically switching roles in the film

As in Chuck gets treated like a dog and Max gets treated like a son. As in they are one and the same sometimes, given that Max is the vehicle of Chuck's repressed emotions, since he refuses to let them out openly. As in Max is the representation of the intricate rituals the Hansens use to communicate the things they cannot say but want to.

I'll try explain it quickly using two scenes from the movie, okay?

First one: when Pentecost and Mako were showing Raleigh the jaeger bay on the Hong Kong Shatterdome and the Hansens arrived just in time to greet the newcomer, Herc tells someone to stay but he is not talking to Max.

His clipped tone given as a short command surprised me because it sounded like the one you'd give your dog when you see someone or some other dog approaching. Now, if you know your dog is a troublemaker and if you have trained, you could give the command to tell him to stay away from the trouble.

But Max runs freely to Mako and Herc only jokes about how Max is always slobbering over pretty girls, a comment you'd expect from a dad about his teenage son. He doesn't tell Max to stop. He doesn't even look at the dog as he's talking with Raleigh.

The one who stayed behind, grounded, was Chuck. This alone tells us so much about the Hansens and their stiff relationship. Chuck is the dog who might bite, the one you need to pull the leash to avoid him attacking. Herc is not a perfect man but here it's obvious he did fuck up as a dad. He gives orders like he's a commander and Chuck a subordinate. Stay.

(I can't remember exactly the dialogue, so you might forgive any discrepancy. What I know is that Herc told Chuck to stay behind while he greeted Raleigh, meaning that Herc knew Chuck might cause a scene. What did he know about Chuck and Raleigh and why did he tell Chuck to stay behind?).

The second scene: on the farewell moment before Operation Pitfall, Chuck kneels to pet Max one last time and tells him to take care of Herc (or was it the other way around?).

I choose this moment to defend my point because here? Here Chuck is assigning Max as his replacement. Not in the mean way, of course, but he acknowledges that his dad might lose his only son and trying to soften the blow, he gives Herc one last mission: to take care of Max and also let Max take care of him. Max is an extension of Chuck, so it's a way of saying that their bond stays there and they will ALWAYS take care of each other, it doesn't matter if Chuck dies during Pitfall.

It's also telling that Chuck kneeling to pet Max is a metaphor for Chuck asking Herc for forgiveness. All his intentions go to Max in that sense. Now Chuck has become Max and Max will always be Chuck. Now, man and dog are one, because the dog has taken Chuck's place as Herc's son and Chuck is the dog that gets send to die at the bottom of the ocean, some fucked up version of Laika up in space.

That's why we see almost every pilot eating at least once in the movie, but not Chuck. He was feeding Max and once it was over, they both walked away like the food was not on Max's belly but Chuck's. That's why Max and Chuck almost never interact with someone at the same time.

Chuck is the kid who got instructed but not raised by his dad. He's the war dog with an impressive killing count that doesn't get to brag because he barks too much and he's not nice to strangers. He is, to any means, just an scared animal behaving like he was taught to. He is confused and jealous when Herc gives his attention (and affection in Chuck's eyes) to someone else. Chuck is desperate to be told he's a good boy, he's enough, he's loved and appreciated. He lashes out when he feels threatened or cornered and he gives puppy eyes meaning "sorry" when he knows he has fucked up, etc etc etc.

An if it feels abhorrent to reduce Chuck to the role of a dog, it speaks volumes about the way he got treated in the movie. In the end, the only thing he really wins during the movie is to be called his father's son. You can argue "but Shan, doesn't he also wins the respect of most characters?" and I'd tell you that it's a sad sad thing that the only way you can get others to acknowledge you as a good man is by exploding yourself at the bottom of the ocean.

I'm not talking about Mako or Raleigh here, because through Max, we know that Mako and Chuck could be friends but in the movie all we get is a tense relationship summarized in maybe one exchange of words (that got Chuck beaten up by the way). And when it comes to Raleigh, all the resolution we got was a silent apology and the equally silent acceptance of such after the Double Event, if we don't count that Chuck was on Raleigh's left side during Stacker's motivational speech

But you know those metaphors of pets being like children? From that angle, Pentecost and Herc are always treating Chuck as an spoiled brat. Which he is, but c'mon. It's not like Herc can talk much being that he failed Chuck big time and it's not like Pentecost wasn't there to witness how the youngest ranger ever to be graduated survived 5 years of actual hell and achieved the best killing count. You don't get there for being a kid. You don't go so far without maturing hard and fast. Chuck is not some annoying puppy picking fights because he's bored. He let's Max sleep and eat and okay to his liking because that's the side that Chuck himself can't be: carefree, soft, selfish in the sense of being self-indulgent.

Mako had to shape herself into a sword to avenge her family and make justice and even survive in a world that tried to kill her when she was still just s little child. Raleigh had to freeze his memories in photographs because he's by now used to tragedy and not having enough time, things ending fast, his happy days going away, losing his home and family. Chuck gave his dog the comfortable life he wishes he could have, he devoted himself to the task of giving Max all that he felt Herc failed to give him, and finally gave Max his place as Herc's son.

Which yeah, pretty much is what I tried to say in many clumsy words ejdjdkjfkfkdn:

Mako, Chuck and Raleigh all had an specific item in the movie that explains or contains them as characters.

[royalwhumpness]

If anyone ever calls you a “snowflake”, which is usually an insult towards those who speak out against racism, sexism, homophobia, transphobia, and the like, you can hit them with some of these cold, hard facts:

Which version of the term ‘snowflake’ are they using?

If they’re using it’s original meaning dated back in the 1800s (mostly used in Missouri), then they’re mixed up, as they would be calling you a racist; which is very much the opposite of what the modern day snowflake is known for. It was coined to describe those that hoped slavery would survive the country’s civil war.

If they’re using it’s 1970’s meaning, then they are insulting you for being white, or if you are a poc, then for 'acting' white. Or they’re calling you cocaine. Again, modern day bigots and incels who throw around the term snowflake are usually white themselves and they would most likely not be trying to insult themselves. Also, they’re probably not calling you cocaine.

If they’re using the modern terminology coined by Chuck Palahniuk (pronounced PUL-nak) in his book/movie, “Fight Club”, kindly remind them that Chuck Palahniuk is a gay man who was writing a satire targeted at hyper-masculinity and consumerism. (You could technically stop there, or you could continue…)

The phrase, “You are not a beautiful and unique snowflake” is not about someone who is weak or sensitive. It was originally a mantra Chuck used as a way to deprogram himself from seeing himself as another mass-produced “genius”. (You know, the way that bigots and incels see themselves.) It was also about rejecting the system that spits out lies of conformity to placate the general population so they stay in their mundane jobs. It was about breaking free of the mold.

- If you don’t want Fight Club spoilers, don’t read further, but I dive into reasons why those that use the insult are idiotic because the movie and the insult don't mean what they think it means.

However, the last paragraph, I think, is a pretty good way to sum up what they're actually saying when they call you a snowflake. -

This post really got away from me lol. It became longer than I wanted, but it was really fun to write.

——————

Fight Club, besides being satiracle, is a form of existentialism, and I would argue absurdism, towards gender roles and consumerism and how they intertwine under the patriarchy.

The Narrator, the protag, is lonely and suffering from debilitating insomnia. He seeks refuge from different support groups which give him comfort, though he does not belong in them. When a woman enters the picture, attending the same support groups which she also shouldn't be apart of, he is thrown off, upset, and quits going, which brings back his insomnia and lonliness.

That’s when he meets Tyler Durdon, a hyper-masculine version of himself that uses aggression and anger as a form of release, the titular fight clubs. Tyler Durdon himself is a satirical representation of the “alpha male”, and a rejection of any and all femininity. He is also a representation of the working class, livid at the classist system and his inability to become the master of his own life. Again, remember, Tyler is The Narrator.

Tyler creates Project Mayhem to destroy the financial institutions, wanting to give a fresh start to the masses. He created this paradox where he aims to destroy this patriarchal institution where he is out of control, by creating a patriarchal institution where he is in control and threatens to castrate anyone who question his authority. Castration has already been established in Fight Club as losing what makes you a man and reduces you to femininity.

How does this relate to gender roles?

- First let me point out that the birth of Fight Club came from an experience Chuck Palauhniuk had when he went to work sporting bruises from a previous altercation, and his coworkers refused to ask him what happened. This is a common theme among most men to refuse to delve into each other’s personal lives, which is seen as an ‘effeminate’ thing to do. -

There are barely any women in fight club but Marla Singer, the woman that intercepted the Narrator’s search for comfort. She is a strong character that exhibits autonomy over her own body (when she walks into traffic, not caring if she lives or dies) and her own free will to do the same things he is doing. To the narrator, she is competition. To Tyler, a caricature of the alpha-male, she is a sex toy. The Narrator’s rejection of women, particularly strong women, entering his world unless used as an object, is a commentary on the sort of utopia hypermasculine and incel men desire. He himself feels demasculinised (is this a word?) by her so his alter ego, Tyler, is his response.

Another good example, is the support group for those with testicular cancer. The Narrator describes Bob as having “bitch tits” which resulted from his castration. The whole group is a mockery of sensitivity among men because it proclaims that the only way a man can be sensitive is by having their balls removed.

There are so many small, minute details in this book/movie that poke fun at the typical hyper-masculine mindset that this was supposed to be a short “in your face” piece on how to combat the snowflake insult that it’s become a small essay on the subject.

Some examples of these small details:

The woman who wants to have sex before she dies is a clever response to the idea that disabled individuals are asexual because of their disibility.

The desire The Narrator has to destroy the face of the well-groomed man is another nod to the idea that masculinity doesn't make room for men to groom themselves or look 'pretty'. (Remember the whole 'metrosexual' thing from the early 2000's? Yeah.)

When Tyler forces all his 'space monkies' to endure the pain of the chemical burn on their hand, it's symbolic of the pain men endure to keep up these masculine appearances whether it causes them physical or mental anguish. It is also a physical mark given to them as a form of conformity, which is also when Tyler gives his snowflake speech, proving that they are not individuals anymore, but are under his patriarchal control.

The term “snowflake” is a jab to the bigots that use it, which is hysterical. What they’re saying is, “You’re not a unique snowflake, you are just like me, a drone of society that cannot think for themselves and has become a consumerist puppet used to feed the system that I admire which is also responsible for keeping me down. The fact that you reject your programming offends me because it forces me to face and question the societal rules, roles, and structures set in place, by man, that I have relied on my entire life. It forces me to face and question the patriarchy, which I currently worship and am a part of.”

[aryasnow]

15 Questions:

tagged by @thehiddenbaroness, @oftwodarkmoons, and @daughter-rhaenyra thank you all!!

1. Are you named after anyone?

Allegedly named after my mom's favorite author, but my first and middle combo was basically the default name for girls in my class growing up. It was her second choice of a name which is disappointing considering her first choice was awesome. Instead I am literally Trendy McTrendName for the year I was born.

2. When was the last time you cried?

I don't really cry unless I have gone through something life altering or am very, very drunk. As such I'm guessing the last time was last St. Patrick's Day, as it likely will be again tomorrow.

3. Do you have kids?

No, never wanted them

4. What sports do you play/have you played?

Competitive swimming was my entire life from elementary school on until I had to dial it back and eventually quit in college (too many injuries). I also did a fair amount of skiiing/snowshoeing/hiking/kayaking/etc growing up. In my 20's I got very into distance running but had to quit in 2019 because of (new and different!) injuries. These days I mostly do running (though less than before) and weights. Since the TikTok brigade took over my gym post-pandemic, I have been trying to somehow build a home gym in my 800 sq ft apartment and at this point I am only a stationary bike away from being free of them forever.

5. Do you use sarcasm?

You could say so, yes

6. What’s the first thing you notice about people?

Honestly I am usually trying so hard not to make eye contact with people that I don't see much of anything. I suppose the honest answer is that I can tell if their body language is genuine or fake. And to really answer it, eyes and also arms. I love that my husband can pick me up like it's nothing what can I say ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

7. What’s your eye color?

Very, very dark brown.

8. Scary movies or happy endings?

I am pretty indifferent to scary movies though I do enjoy them from time to time. I do like happy endings mostly because I hate loose ends. It's okay if they're bittersweet though.

9. Any talents?

Cooking and baking. They're my primary hobbies for a reason.

10. Where were you born?

The most beautiful state in the Union.

11. What are your hobbies?

Cooking (I try to do a new recipe once a week), baking, fitness, trivia leagues, word puzzles, garbage television, this godforsaken website.

12. Do you have any pets?

yep <3

they are 10 and 11 this year and it's absolutely killing me. I need them to live forever.

13. How tall are you?

5'6''

14. Favorite subject in school?

I loved English and US history a lot, but biology was always my favorite. In college it was biological anthro and archaeology.

15. Dream job?

My first thought was wine critic but I realized I would need to get better at describing wine as things other than "good" or "okay" (It would take a lot for me to call a wine bad. I drank exclusively Two Buck Chuck for years).

I think some sort of hotel or restaurant critic would be my dream. Letting me sample pretentious things while being professionally judgmental really would be ideal for me.

Please consider yourself tagged if you would like to fill this out!!

[hexedwinchester]

Promise I’m not trying to start shit, genuinely curious. What do you think of Sam’s ending, specifically the flash-forward?

hi @catsconflictscopicsandchamomile

No worries at all. This blog is a safe place.. :)

IMO Sam's ending sort of depends on the future of SPN. What i mean by that is, if that's it and there is no new season or a movie, then to be honest with you, it's a satisfactory ending and here's why:

Sam literally got what he wanted from the start: get out of hunting and to live a safe life. He is someone who dreamt of marrying a woman he loved, start a family with her and knowing Sam, I am 100% sure he would have gone back to college and completed his studies

He raised a child, and had a loving wife. And in a way i am glad they never revealed the blurry wife. As much as i liked Eileen for Sam, there is a wee bit of melancholy to know that after Dean's death, Sam was alone. Despite that, he was strong enough to keep going, you know what i mean?

He died a natural death, went to Heaven and was reunited with Dean.

So yes, if the show ends there, then I am satisfied with the ending

Now, if we were to consider an extension of the storyline, then yes, I can see how this ending wouldn't make sense. I have read a lot of theories, including the ones you put in the comments (good ones btw!) and some of the ones that I did like and would be fun to explore are:

Chuck being a Tulpa instead of God. (Sorry, not sure who came up with this but please DM and I can credit you) This theory explains why Chuck can warp reality around him and is in fact not God which was quite an interesting one because yes, Chuck as God was not played well. They could have done a better job with that.

Your Eileen as a Djinn theory was great too! Having Sam trapped in a perfect reality whilst draining him. This is something i did kinda complain about in one of my SPN re-run reviews S02E20 where i mentioned how we haven't seen Sam infected by Djinn whereas Dean was already a victim on two different occasions. so if this is where the flash-forward was headed, it would be a good one. I also liked the touch of Eileen's Irish folklore. Not much has been explored here.

Personally, i feel like the perfect Sam-ending happened in S5 already. Sam fulfilled his destiny of being Lucifer's vessel but turned it around. The whole martyrdom arc was beautifully written. Sam sacrifices himself for the greater good, Dean learns to move on without his brother (god, this was so needed). It was unfair but quite how life works!

For S15 ending, i would have loved it to be a bit darker like S5. Maybe this time, both brothers die and they die bloody but their deaths mean something, unlike what happened with Dean. His death seemed very random, i mean out of everything that could kill him, it's a rebar? really? I wanted the ending to be a bit darker for Sam than a happy flash-forward. the "it had to be" had a beautiful ring to it. Don't get me wrong, i do love happy endings but something about Sam dying a martyr death would have been amazing!

Thank you so much for this ask! it was fun to explore different perspectives! Feel free to send me more if you have them :)

[ayyyez]

Love how the majority of your haikyuu masterlist is going to be filled w/ asks by me <3 Teamwork

ANYWAY, how about hcs of haikyuu characters favorite Ghibli films?? Again, pick any characters that come to your mind, though I'll toss in Ennoshita as he's a film enthusiast and Yachi sense she hasn't been requested yet!

A/N: pfft! Yeah, it's you, me and our Haikyuu headcanons against the world bestie <3 BUT yeah of course I'll do these. Actually I have this urge to watch Porco Rosso again now. I did watch my fav recently too.

TAGS: general headcanons, fav movies, studio ghibli films, fluff, Director Ennoshita vibes, Sweet Yachi, Snuggled up Ghibli date with Kenma, Hinata siblings bonding, Kuroo is a dork

CHARACTERS: Ennoshita Chikara, Yachi Hitoka, Kenma Kozume, Hinata Shouyou, Kuroo Tetsurou with honourable mentions at the end

ENNOSHITA CHIKARA:

While Ennoshita can sit down and enjoy films I feel like he enjoys watching them more for the analytical film side of things. He likes to break them down and analyse the technical and thematical aspects as well as thinking about how he feels watching them.

The film buff in him holds Grave of the Fireflies (1988) so highly that even though it ripped his heart out he holds it as one of his favourite must watch in your life time films. He definitely cried his eyes out too. Not ashamed to admit it either. Can talk for hours about the powerful themes and will convince you to watch it if you haven't.

I think his all time favourite Ghibli movie though would be Princess Mononoke (1997). It just has that rewatchability, the visuals, the action, the complexity of the characters and the 'you're beautiful' line. It just captures everything he loves in films. Ennoshita the simp identifying with the simp characters. Hell yeah.

I think he'd watch all of the Ghibli films at least once and enjoy most of them enough to rewatch.

YACHI HITOKA:

I don't think she watches many movies. Ghibli movies I feel are the few that Yachi did come across though. I think a friend in her elementary school years introduced them to her. The first one she ever saw was Spirited Away (2001) and its held a special place in her heart ever since. It's probably her favourite one to rewatch.

She would have this fantasy as a kid too that every time she walked down an alleyway or through an arch she'd be whisked off away to another world. Yachi knew it was silly but it was her only escape from her studies.

Another one she really likes is Kiki's Delivery Service (1989). She really admires Kiki's confidence of being able to go out into world so young and make it on her own. It's the kind of confidence she wished she had for herself. As she gets older and grows confident she looks back on this movie with warmth, seeing herself become more confident like Kiki.

I like to think Ghibli movies for Yachi are comfort movies that she returns to in adulthood that remind her how much she's grown.

KENMA KOZUME:

I've said before he's into anime and manga, I think he'd be into Ghibli films too. I feel he'd chuck them on as way to wind down from gaming. Snug in bed and content just putting on a nice Ghibli film. Perfect. His perfect date night too honestly. There's actually a few I feel he'd like so I've given him a top 3 in no particular order.

Howl's Moving Castle (2004)—it's a staple and one of his most rewatched. He finds it easy to watch, likes the music, the banter of the romance couple and yeah maybe Howl's kinda hot sometimes even when he's pathetic. Kind of wants Howl merch. Buys the earrings.

When Marnie Was There (2014)—Shed a tear or two the first time because wow he wasn't expecting such a touching story. Was there for all the feels. Watched it again a few days later because it was stuck on his mind. It became one of his favs he puts on those occassions he wants to feel something.

Whisper of the Heart (1995)—Maybe because it's also my fav and the main love interest reminds me of a my fav dork that gets paired with Kenma and I feel like thats cute. But also I just feel like he'd vibe with this cute movie a lot! His fav character is the cat Muta.

HINATA SHOUYOU:

Loves to watch these movies with his sister Natsu. They watch anime together in general but Ghibli movies are just those extra fun ones they put on. They have a range but his favourite one is probably My Neighbour Totoro (1988).

Totoro is one of the first films Hinata remembers watching in general so it's mostly the nostalgia that makes it his favourite. He's an emotional film enjoyer. It's not about the themes or the analysis. He just wants to have fun and enjoy himself. Also the memories of watching it with his sister is what makes it special.

You know as well that if he's sharing this film with you then it's a big deal. It means a lot to him. It's a treasured part of his childhood. It's probably something he takes with him to brazil aswell like a little piece of home along with his one piece manga.

Bought his sister a little Totoro keychain in his third year when he was in Tokyo. Gave it to her before he left for brazil. It was like a little goodbye to their childhood together.

KUROO TETSUROU:

He's another one I feel has a couple of favourites. Ones he has come to love and find comfort films in.

The first one is just one he likes for the themes, the main character and the laughs. Porco Rosso (1992)—Obviously loves the whole seaplane pirates action of it all and heroic main character. I feel like he'd identify with the main character not being good at admiting romantic feelings (Kuroo's a fumbler). Also appreciates the character growth throughout the film. Also the whole 'I'd rather be a pig than facist.' 10/10.

Only Yesterday (1991)—This one I see him watching on a whim when he was younger. His parents were arguing again, his life was a little unstable and uncertain (this was before he moved nextdoor to Kenma) and he needed to drown the noise out. He found this movie put it on and really connected with it. He really felt lost like the main character and felt hope watching it—seeing there was a hopeful ending.

I think as he gets older and expands his viewing I think Kuroo would also vibe with Whisper of the Heart (1995). He'd vibe with the main love interest. He's on the same level, trying to be cool to win over the person he has a crush on but really he's been pining all this time. Also working hard to pursue his dreams? Kuroo all over. He's also just a sucker for a love.

HONOURABLE MENTIONS:

My Neighbor Totoro (1988)/Kiki's Delivery Service (1989): Kiyoko Shimizu, Yaku Morisuke, Yamaguchi Tadashi

Porco Rosso (1992)/Princess Mononoke (1997): Bokuto Koutarou, Iwaizumi Haijime, Tanaka Ryuunosuke, Saeko Tanaka, Osamu Miya, Atsumu Miya, Suna Rintarou

Only Yesterday(1991)/Whisper of the Heart (1995): Oikawa Tooru, Akaashi Keiji, Kenji Futakuchi

Spirited Away (2001)/Howl's Moving Castle (2004): Kunimi Akira, Semi Eita, Kageyama Tobio, Kiyoomi Sakusa

Ponyo (2008)/The Secret World of Arrietty (2010)/When Marnie Was There (2014): Tendou Satori (he likes them all but it's the visuals and emotions), Aone Takanobu, Koganegawa Kanji, Kentarou Kyoutani

[project1939]

200 Films of 1952

Film number 161: Breaking the Sound Barrier (aka, The Sound Barrier)

Release date: Dec 6th, 1952 

Studio: London Film Productions/British Lion Films 

Genre: drama 

Director: David Lean 

Producer: David Lean 

Actors: Ralph Richardson, Ann Todd, Nigel Patrick, John Justin 

Plot Summary: J.R., a wealthy British airplane manufacturer, helped design a jet engine that makes breaking the sound barrier possible. A brilliant test pilot is chosen for the first flight, but he is also J.R.’s son-in-law. J.R.’s daughter Sue is frantic with worry over her husband’s safety, and she cannot understand why his life must be put into such danger. 

My Rating (out of five stars): ***¾  

This is an early David Lean film made just a few years before he became a superstar with The Bridge on the River Kwai, Lawrence of Arabia, and Doctor Zhivago. This is a much smaller and simpler film than those, and if you hadn’t told me Lean directed this, I don’t think I would have guessed. Overall, this was enjoyable, and it definitely had its thrilling moments, but my main problem with it was the balance between the thrilling moments in the air and the family drama on the ground. (some spoilers!)

The Good: 

Ralph Richardson as John/J.R. His performance was very moving. For the first ¾ of the film, it was easy to believe he was just a cold unemotional man with a laser focus on work. As the plot unfolds, it slowly becomes apparent that it is absolutely not the truth. The script lays most of the burden to communicate this on Richardson, and he runs with it. 

Ann Todd as Sue. I immediately liked her- she wore very little makeup throughout, she had a wit about her, she was pretty in a fresh appealing way, and she didn’t completely succumb to the “Hollywood Good Wife Syndrome.” She caught a case of it, for sure, but thankfully it wasn’t deadly.  

Nigel Patrick as Tony, Sue’s test pilot husband. He was dashing, charming, and very likeable. 

The highlight of the movie was all the exciting flying scenes. There were several of them, and most were either real or highly convincing. They were edited and paced well to draw you in and keep your eyes glued to the screen. 

There were lots of real locations used and actual flying footage. It didn’t feel like a soundstage film. 

The orchestra in the background was fantastic. I enjoyed the score as well, but the orchestra itself sounded so beautiful I had to remind myself a couple of times to actually watch the movie and not just listen to it. 

The emotional complexity of J.R. As I mentioned when I discussed Richardson, I think the actual heart of the movie is this story arc. Because of Richardson’s performance and the delicate way it was written and shot, it was very affecting. 

The traumatic plot twist about 1 hour and 20 minutes in. I did NOT see it coming, and when it did, I kept writing “No! No! No!” in my notes. It was a very brave choice to make at that particular time within the film. In most films an event of this kind would either happen near the beginning or near the end. There was still 35 minutes of runtime in this. I give that plus marks for the uniqueness and audacity, and I think it ultimately made the film more powerful. 

I liked the relationship that developed between J.R. and Tony, his son-in-law. The way they became close tugged at my heart-stings, and yet the film never really veered toward the sentimental.

The Bad: 

Erasing Chuck Yeager from history! Now, I am no aviation expert, but even going into this film, I could have told you that American Chuck Yeager was actually the first person to break the sound barrier. How did I know that? From a movie, of course! 1983’s The Right Stuff! 

The film had a difficult time explaining why breaking the sound barrier was important. It seemed very hesitant to talk about the Soviets or Communism, or anything to do with the military. That was frustrating, especially when Sue was desperately trying to understand it herself. 

This movie was a mixture of a family drama and an adventure/thriller, and it didn’t work as well as it could have. The balance between the two was off for me- I think too much time was spent on family stuff, and not enough on the actual flying. I appreciated that it didn’t just half-heartedly cram in a little bit of family stuff, which is what most adventure films do, but it may have swung too far to the other side. 

Wow, the movie certainly believed baby boys were better than baby girls! It was deemed hugely important that Sue give birth to a boy.  

Women in the film were minimized in other ways- all of them were housewives who worried while the men went off to do important manly things. HOWEVER, this film gets a lot of points for making characters like Sue and Jess fairly well rounded. Neither of those women were just sweet little pushovers. Sue also appeared to have been in the Service at some point.

Oh god, more East Asian racism! It’s thankfully been quite awhile since this kind of “humor” has reared its disgusting head in my 1952 watchlist, but this was one of those horrible “Chinaman” jokes told for “comedic relief.” The less said, the better. 

There was a pretty clunky scene that used Sue as a conduit for the probable aeronautic ignorance of the audience. It briefly became an educational film that spelled things out like a mini-lecture on what the sound barrier actually was, the requirements for breaking it, and the dangers of doing so. It was helpful for me to have some things explicitly explained, but as a scene it felt awkward and contrived. It also seemed dubious that Sue would've been totally ignorant of this.

[charlunday]

AAAAAAAAAA YES

[youryanderedaddy]

I had a dream just now that might make a good story. So, I had a virus on my laptop which allowed a hacker to see everything I did on my computer and use my webcam. The hacker ends up falling in love with me after stalking me for a few months and pays for someone on the dark web to kidnap me. It works, and then I wake up tied up in the hacker's arm as he caresses and kisses me. That's pretty much it, good night! 🌙

Yo this is my kink 😳

Also I couldn't not write this for Saeran, ok.

Title: Stranger danger

Tw: nsfw - ish, female reader, masturbation, cyber stalking, hacking, mentions of dark web, very irresponsible online behavior, obsessive behavior, implied kidnapping

You knew that this was a stupid idea. Lurking on the dark web with almost no protection other than the Tor browser and some free anti-virus program wasn't your best decision, but fuck it if it wasn't entertaining. You had always been drawn to the darker, scarier part of the human mind and this side of the internet proved quite interesting. Your friends always warned you about the dangers that came with looking up shady online searches and sites but everything had been quite peaceful so far. There weren't hackers or murderers on the dark web, the worst you had seen were people selling drugs and weapons for unreasonable prices, along with some questionable fetish porn and the typical popping ads.

Your favorite thing to do while online was chatting. Two weeks ago you had stumbled upon an unusual forum called "Scream buddies" where upon entering you were automatically connected to another random profile. The whole theme of the forum was discussing horror and mondo movies, shockumentaries and overall creepy stuff, your forte. The person you met on there shared a similar fascination with all things dark and gory which soon made talking to them the only thing you were looking forward upon opening the site.

You didn't know much about the guy behind the profile yet, except that he was a young man. His icon showed an eye so green it emited with the neon pigment and his username was just as mysterious - BlueRose7. You enjoyed chatting with him about your hobby but the thing you liked the most was undressing him little by little, metaphorically so, by getting pieces of information about his life. It started small - his favorite food, favorite book, favorite game, but the moment you tried digging deeper and asked whether he had siblings or not, the man simply disappeared for the next few days. You quickly realized just what type of topics you needed to avoid to keep your new friend from leaving. Family, childhood memories and work matters were out of the picture.

The stranger wasn't fair, not really. He didn't show you vulnerability and kept his secrecy while demanding to know everything there was to know about you. For the longest time you didn't want to answer just to stay on a equal footing, just to show him how frustrating it was, but there was something about the man that drew you in. He was magnetic, clever and witty, if a bit pessimistic and dark at times. You couldn't help telling him everything he wanted to hear - what your job was, whether you were single or not, all that jazz. In your defense, BlueRose7 actually listened to your stories, took your problems seriously and provided solutions, which despite being too extreme and overprotective at times (upon hearing that your bestfriend talked behind your back he offered to "take care" of her), were comforting. It was nice to have someone caring around even if you met him on a sketchy website.

Meanwhile your personal life wasn't going too great. You had to balance between attending college, working long shifts as a waitress and meeting your friends from time to time which was draining. On top of all there was a weird virus on your computer which resulted in the camera turning on and off and the most random times of the day - while you were studying, watching TV, or in some cases, fully naked and ready to take a bath. You didn't think much of it though, with all the illegal movies and games you downloaded along with the dark web lurking it was more than expected for your laptop to behave weirdly. You didn't even mention it to your friend from the IT major because you knew that he'd force you to delete Tor and put an end to your internet adventures.

One time you were particularly bored after several long lectures and you were laying in bed, the camera turned on once again. It was a hot afternoon and you were wearing boyshorts and a loose T- shirt with nothing underneath it, you were home alone so there was no need. The bright red spot was twinking like a recorder, the light reflecting in your eyes, when a silly little idea came to your mind. You slid your hand under your blouse and lifted the fabric up, exposing your breasts to the laptop, your nipples hardening due to the sudden coldness, becoming pink and stiff in seconds. You played with for a few minutes, pinching and pulling the buds gently, moaning softly into the pleasant sensation. Soon you could feel yourself getting wet, and slowly, teasingly, removed your shorts and panties. You smiled at the camera, biting your lip provocatively, imagining you were a camgirl performing for her desperate little fanboys and fangirls. The thought alone was enough to make you spread your legs wide and slip two fingers into your throbbing cunt, using the wetness to push deeper. You used your other hand to stroke your clit and whimpered wantonly, your face red, your neck sweaty and your heart pumping fast from the adrenaline. You were quickly reaching your orgasm and your mind wondered to the boy you were talking to in the forum. You wondered how he looked like, how his body was built, whether he was a sweet sensual lover or a rough mean one. Fucked up as it was, you pictured the man as one of your most loyal viewers, watching all of your streams with a fist around his thick vock and an excited grin on his face. He would comment things like "you look so beautiful like this" or perhaps even "pretty little slut" after tipping you enough to last you a week. Soon all the mental stimulation sent you over the edge and you came with a loud cry full of pleasure. Well, this felt good.

After your "performance" was over the camera was magically turned off, which may have caused some concerns if you weren't too busy feeling embarrassed and dirty about the unhinged fantasy you had just had, and with a person you knew nothing about. You managed to calm down though - it wasn't nothing more than a fun pastime, a naughty thought that would never become the reality. You would never actually meet BlueRose7, right? There was nothing to worry about, so you just went on with your day.

You had some dinner afterwards and decided to have an early night as you already felt full and tired. You put on your favoruite pajamas and laid in bed, staring at the ceiling until you fell into deep dreamless sleep.

You woke up due to a weird noise. You could hear someone's heavy breathing right next to your ear, someone's grabby hands were wrapped tightly against your body, trapping you between the wall and their hard chest. You had only a few seconds to scream before the intruder's palm covered your mouth.

"Shhh." The man whispered softly and stroked your hair like you were a doll he was playing with. "Don't scream or I'll be forced to hurt you, flower. I have a gun." His voice sounded deep and rough but this didn't stop you from thrashing and turning on your side until you came face to face with the man. It was dark in the room and you couldn't exactly see all his features but his enchanting green eyes would forever be burned into your memory - they seemed dashing, hypnotizing. You couldn't utter a word.

"It's me, the person you've been talking to all these months. I came to take you home" He spoke out suddenly, the line of his mouth twisting into a smile or a smirk, you couldn't quite tell. You shook your head no, tears threatening to spill all over your cheeks from the fear. It couldn't be him, the man would never do that to you. Or would he? With what little information you knew, you couldn't really tell. His hold finally loosen, seeing you quiet like that.

"Let me go, please." You begged, pushing at his shoulders weakly since you were still sleepy, groggy and tired. "I don't know you." You said, hoping this would remind the stranger you weren't friends, lovers or anything that gave him the right to be so close to you, to touch you so intimately. Unfortunately, this only seemed to amuse him and he chucked darkly as he pulled your hair away to place a small chaste kiss on your neck.

"But I know you, flower." Your supposed online friend replied shortly after, his eyes full of malice. "And your little show today makes me think you want to know me too." He added in a low tone, licking his lips before smashing them on yours, forcing his tongue deep into your mouth just to hear your whines and protests. Then it hit you. The camera, the virus, the questions. He had watched you, he knew where you worked, where you lived and studied, everything. You had told him after all.

The hacker thought you looked so adorable right now, figuring things out, helpless, confused, regretful and most of all, weak. You were so weak and careless, and he loved you for it. It reminded him of himself before life screwed him over.

You wouldn't be in this position, underneath him, if you had just told someone about your laptop virus and the bad guy you had encountered online. But Saeran couldn't say he wasn't glad your self-preservation instincts were so very broken and dysfunctional. He wouldn't meet you otherwise. "I need you, princess. That's why I'll take you to Paradise." These were the final words you heard before you felt lightheaded and sleepy again, your last memory a pair of green mint eyes.

You really shouldn't have trusted strangers on the internet.

[bi-bard]

Please Say That You're Joking (Pt.1) - Chuck Shurley Imagine (Supernatural)

Title: Please Say You're Joking (Pt. 1) [You can read part 2 by clicking here!]

Pairing: Chuck Shurley X Winchester!Reader

Requested: Nope

Word Count: 2,930 words

Warning(s): mentions of sex, threats of violence

Summary: (Season 4; Season 11) (Y/n) had a single one-night stand while coping with loss in a not healthy way... if only they had a clue about the weight of their actions.

Author's Note: I was recently going back through some of the "lighter" episodes of Supernatural because I wanted to watch something I could chuckle at. That's where this came from.

This might be the most crackheaded thing I've written in a while.

Also, the amount of things I had to bullshit my way through this is actually ridiculous.

Hey! I did a rewrite of the ending of Supernatural. It took a really long time to complete, so it would mean a lot to me if you check it out. Here’s a link! (it’s on my personal account)

-------------------------------------

Sam, Dean, and I walked into the motel room. We were all confused and slightly scared.

We had gone to a comic book shop to do some work on a case. However, we were then called fans.

Fans of what?

Well, fans of a series of books about our lives.

I was the middle Winchester child. Two years younger than Dean, two years older than Sam. I was beyond confused when I saw some weird, romanticized version of me on the cover of a book.

"This is so weird," I mumbled, plopping onto one of the beds in the room.

Sam jumped onto his laptop and started researching. Dean was holding one of the books, reading through it. I didn't even want to touch it.

"I don't like how he describes (Y/n)," Dean commented. "It's weird. It's like he's in love. Listen to this..."

Dean dramatically clears his throat and starts to read in an even more dramatic voice, "'Even after a hard hunt, (Y/n) could easily be seen as the most beautiful of the siblings. They mimicked the beauty of their mother more than their brothers. There's no bruise or cut that could take the loveliness away from the natural curves of (Y/n)'s face. If only they could see how everyone else would stare-"

"Okay, ew," I muttered, walking to the table. "What'd you find?"

"Well, it seems like Carver Edlund is a pen name," Sam shrugged. "And the fans are intense."

"As in," Dean asked, closing the book and joining the two of us at the table.

"Well," Sam handed me the laptop so Dean and I could look at it, "there's fanfiction. About all of us."

"What's this, 'Sam/Dean'," I asked.

"It's... me and Dean... together."

"They just don't care that we're related," Dean asked. Sam nodded.

"God, this is so weird."

"So, how do we find this guy," I asked.

--time skip--

We managed to find the publisher of the novels and found her house.

"So, you published the 'Supernatural' books," I asked as we walked in.

"Yep," she nodded. "Yeah, gosh. These books... they never really got the attention that they deserved. All anybody wants to read anymore is that romance crap."

"Could not agree with you more," I said. "We're hoping that our article can shine a light on an underappreciated series."

"Yeah, because, you know, if we got a little bit of good press, then maybe we can start publishing again," she replied excitedly.

"No, no, no," Dean immediately shut her down. "I mean, why... why would you want to do that? It's such a complete series with Dean going to hell and all."

"Oh my god, that was one of my favorite ones," she rambled. "Dean was so strong and sad and brave. And Sam... I mean... the best ones are when they cry... like in 'Heart' when Sam had to kill Madison; the first woman since Jessica he'd really loved. When Dean had to call John in 'Home' and ask him for help. Or when (Y/n) went back to the motel room after getting kidnapped and just had to sit in their own head and had to truly process not only the death of their mother but now their father. The mixed feelings were amazing."

"You're a really big fan," I noted. She nodded.

"Gosh, if only real men were that open about their emotions."

"Real men," Dean asked.

"I mean, no offense," she replied. "How often do you cry like that?"

"Well, right now I'm crying on the inside," he muttered.

"Is that supposed to be funny?"

"Lady, this whole thing is funny."

"How am I supposed to know this is legit?"

"Oh, trust me," Dean mumbled. "We're legit."

"Well, I don't want some smart-ass article making fun of my boys," she snapped as she sat in her chair.

"Oh, never," I replied quickly. "We actually are big fans."

"You read the books?"

"Cover to cover," I promised.

"What's the year and model of the car?"

"1967 Chevy Impala," Dean smiled proudly.

"What's May 2nd?"

"That's my- uh... Sam's birthday," Sam replied.

"Sam's score on the LSAT?"

"Umm... 174," Sam said nervously.

"(Y/n)'s first hunt?"

"Vampire in Washington," I answered. "Dean was at the motel sick and (Y/n) almost chopped John's head off when he scared them."

"(Y/n)'s favorite memory that's not related to hunting?"

I smiled, "Helping Sam get ready for a date when he was a teenager because Sam didn't trust what Dean had told him."

"Dean's favorite song?"

"It's a tie," Dean replied. "Between Zep's 'Ramble On' and 'Traveling Riverside Blues.'"

She finally laughed and smiled again, "Okay, okay. What do you wanna know?"

"What's Carver Edlund's real name," Sam asked.

"Oh, no. I can't," she shook her head.

"We just wanna talk to him," Sam continued. "You know, get the 'Supernatural' story in his own words."

"He's very private," she shrugged. "Like Salinger."

"Please," Sam tried again. "Like I said, we're um... big fans."

Sam unbuttoned his shirt enough to show his anti-possession tattoo. Dean pulled his shirt to the side to do the same. I rolled my eyes and yanked the arm of my jacket down and pulled up the sleeve of my t-shirt. I don't wear as many layers as them and I had opted to put the tattoo on my upper arm because I thought it looked nicer.

"Awesome," the lady mumbled before standing up. "Y'know what?"

I looked away as she pulled her pants down.

"I got one too."

"Wow, you are a fan," I slapped Dean's arm. The lady fixed her clothing before grabbing a pen and paper.

"Okay," she said. "His name's Chuck Shurley-"

And I stopped listening after that. I knew that name... why did I know that name... oh... oh no. I'm gonna kill him. We're going to meet this man and I am going to end up killing him.

I followed Sam and Dean as they started walking out of the woman's house.

"Excuse me," she called as we reached the door. We looked back at her. "I'm sorry, but you look exactly like how I picture (Y/n) when I read the books."

I chuckled, "Thanks."

"He describes (Y/n) with so much detail," she smiled. "You could play them in a movie."

"Thank you," I waved as we walked out.

"'You could play them in a movie,'" Dean teased.

"I know who Chuck is," I said, ignoring him.

"What," he asked. I nodded. "How?"

I pointed to get into the car. I got in the back seat and Sam and Dean sat upfront. Dean started driving to the address the lady gave us before I started speaking.

"Okay, when you went to hell, Sam's not the only one who ran off," I explained. "I wasn't gone for four months... just two weeks. In those two weeks, I got involved in a single one-night stand. The name he gave me was Chuck Shurley."

"You screwed the man who wrote books about us," Dean asked, sounding angry.

"Do you think I knew he was writing books based on our lives?"

"He had to have known who you are," Sam added. "This isn't an accident. He has to get visions or something."

"Yeah, I know," I nodded. "He made money off of my name and then screwed me."

"Damn," Dean mumbled. "I missed a hell of a lot."

I rolled my eyes.

--time skip--

I knocked on the door loudly. Sam grabbed my arm, shaking his head at me. The door was opened and I smiled obnoxiously as Chuck. He was in a robe, his boxers, and an old white shirt. He looked tired and like he hadn't had a goodnight's sleep in days.

"Chuck Shurley," Dean asked.

"Chuck Shurley that wrote the Supernatural books," Sam added.

"Nice to meet you," I said. "This is Sam... Dean... and I'm (Y/n)... the ones you've written books about."

Chuck sighed and went to shut the door. I stepped in, stopping it with my foot.

"Listen, I appreciate the enthusiasm, I really do and I remember you," he motioned at me, awkwardly grinning before seeming to shake the memories out of his head. I almost slapped him right then. "But please... go get a life."

"You see," Dean followed me, helping to force our way inside. Sam made sure the door shut behind us. "We have a life... and you're selling books about it."

"Okay, this isn't funny," Chuck mumbled.

"You're right," I said. "We just wanna know how you're doing it?"

"I'm just a writer, I'm not doing anything."

"Then why do you know so much about demons and tulpas and changelings?"

"Is this some kind of 'Misery' thing? Ah, it is, isn't it? It's a 'Misery' thing!"

"No, it's not," I shook my head. "Believe me, we're not fans."

"What do you want then," he asked.

"I'm Sam... and that's Dean and (Y/n)," Sam tried again.

"Those are fictional characters," Chuck yelled. "They aren't real!"

Dean grabbed him and pulled him outside.

"Wait, wait-"

"We aren't kidnapping you, calm down," I rolled my eyes. Dean opened the hidden compartment in the impala's trunk.

"Are those real guns?"

"Yes," I nodded. "And real rock salt, real fake IDs."

Chuck let out a laugh at it, "Well, I gotta hand it to you guys. You really are my number-one fans. That... That's awesome. So, I-I think I've got some poster in the house."

"Chuck, stop," I rolled my eyes, grabbing his arm as he went to walk away.

"Please don't hurt me," he begged.

"How much do you know," Sam asked. "Do you know about the angels? Or Lilith breaking the seals?"

"How do you know about that?"

"Have you not been listening," I asked. "The real question is how do you?"

"Because I wrote it," he explained.

"You kept writing?"

"The books never came out because the publisher went bankrupt," he furrowed his eyebrows.

I stepped back, letting go of his arms.

"Okay, wait a minute," Chuck crossed his arms. "This is some kind of joke, right? Did Phil put you up to this?"

"Oh my god," I muttered, pinching the bridge of my nose. I grabbed his robe. "I'm sorry but I'm really tired. Nice to meet you. I'm (Y/n) Winchester, these are my brothers, Sam and Dean Winchester. You wrote and published books about us, probably knew who I was, and then you still slept with me."

He stared at me in shock.

"What," I asked.

"The last names were never in the books," he mumbled. "I never told anyone about that. I never even wrote that down."

"Then I guess we have a lot to talk about," I let go of his robe.

The three of us followed him inside.

--time skip--

"I got a visit from Cas," Dean explained as he walked in. "I've some important information."

After talking to Chuck and getting a draft of what was supposed to happen, we were all panicking. Dean told us to wait here. Lilith was going to come for Sam and we both thought it'd be harder if there was more than one of us here at all times.

Now, Dean was coming back from seeing Chuck.

"And that important information is...," Sam trailed off.

"He's a prophet of the lord," Dean said, smirking at me.

I shut my eyes, letting my head fall forward.

"Please say you're joking," I mumbled.

"Nope," Dean replied.

Sam looked over at me. He only started chuckling after his brother broke.

Dean was laughing his head off within seconds, "You screwed a prophet!"

"Shut up," I groaned. "I'm gonna kill him!"

"Archangel will kill you."

"I'll happily pay that price," I muttered. "I slept with a prophet."

"At least that means he didn't write himself to sleep with you," Sam tried to comfort me.

"Yeah, God just decided I was supposed to sleep with the guy publishing books about my life," I replied sarcastically. "That makes me feel so much better."

"Come on, it could be worst-"

"Sam, love you, but don't finish that sentence if you even kind of value your life," I muttered.

I was desperate for this conversation to just end.

--time skip--

After all was said and done, and Chuck accidentally helped us chase Lilith away for a while, we gave Chuck a lift back to his place.

I followed him up to his door, offering to look around and make sure that he's safe. He shook his head.

"I have an archangel protecting me," he reminded me. "Can't get any safer than that."

I nodded.

"I'm sorry, by the way," he said. "About us. I didn't recognize you until after... it all... and I didn't say anything because I didn't really know how to explain it. The whole event makes me feel all scummy."

"It's alright," I replied with a chuckle. "It's fine, I promise."

He offered me a nervous smile, "Y'know, in all of my visions, you're the most vivid thing."

With a grin, I leaned over and kissed his cheek gently. I stepped back and headed back toward the impala. I made sure to take note of his nervous and flustered face.

"See you around, Chuck!"

"You... You too," he called after me. I got in the backseat and got comfortable.

"So... screwing the prophet wasn't that bad," Dean asked.

I just rolled my eyes, waving through the window at Chuck as Dean pulled away from the curb. Leave it to a Winchester to end up in a situation like that.

--time skip (season 11)--

Sam and I followed Dean with our guns ready. Dean was following the amulet that he had owned for a long time without even knowing it could show us where God was.

Everyone had been infected by Amara only minutes ago but now it was okay and Dean's amulet was glowing.

"Holy shit," I mumbled, seeing who was walking over to us.

Chuck.

He was supposed to be dead. That's why Kevin's prophet powers had been activated.

"No way," Dean said.

"Hey," Chuck... or God said. "We need to talk."

Despite our understandable hesitation, Chuck reached forward, teleporting all of us back to the bunker. I stepped away from him, slightly overwhelmed.

"(Y/n)," Chuck walked over and tried to grab my arm. I instinctually slapped him. I was nothing but confusion and anger. "I deserved that. Just, please?"

I stepped away again.

From behind Chuck stepped Kevin's ghost. My breath caught in my throat. The poor boy had been through so much shit because of us.

Kevin told us about how we looked stressed and that we should listen to Chuck.

Then, Chuck waved his hand. Kevin turned into a ball of white and blue light before ascending beyond the bunker.

"Where'd he go," I asked.

"Heaven, where he deserves," Chuck promised. I nodded.

I listened to the rant about how Chuck had abandoned us all and how awful things were. Then, the conversation turned to the plan to stop Amara. The boys talked about needing Lucifer and Chuck got incredibly upset. In a fit, he went to leave. I stepped in front of him.

"No," I said bluntly. "Even if you want to avoid the subject of your estranged son, you can't just leave."

"(Y/n)-"

"Sam, Dean," I looked at them. "Give us a minute?"

They both nodded, glaring at Chuck on their way out. I tried to ignore the instincts that were telling me that Chuck was just selfish.

"(Y/n)," Chuck mumbled.

"Just answer my questions," I said. "Then we can discuss what to do with Amara without you storming away recklessly. Okay?"

He nodded.

"Have you been God the whole time," I asked.

He nodded.

"You wrote all of our stories?"

Another nod.

"Did you write that I was going to sleep with you?"

I felt manipulated and angry. I was desperate for an answer. I knew that this could've made me feel like dirt, but I needed to know.

"No," Chuck said. I clenched my jaw, ready to call him a liar. "I told you. I had been pretty much hands-off for a long time. Did I know who were? Absolutely. I'm sorry I lied to you about that. But I didn't plan anything between us. We weren't some divine plan."

I nodded, looking down.

"You know how Dean and Amara are connected," he asked. I nodded, looking back at him. "We're like them."

"And that's not a divine plan-"

"I'm not doing a good job explaining this," Chuck shook his head. "It feels like we're like them. Like there's this bond that just happened as soon as we met."

"You lied to me, for years," I said. "Saying we have some bond isn't gonna fix that."

"I know."

We both fell silent. Slowly, I started laughing. Chuck furrowed his eyebrows, "My only one-night stand... and it was God."

Chuck started laughing with me while I really processed what I had done.

I slowly stopped laughing.

I didn't notice until it was too late that Chuck had slowly gotten closer to me. As soon as his lips brushed mine, I pushed him back. Not hard, but enough to get him to step away.

"No," I mumbled. "Not that, no."

Chuck nodded, "Got it."

"Now," I sighed, "we need to actually plan to stop Amara, and if we need Luci-"

"We don't," he said bluntly. "We can do something else. We don't need him. Okay?"

I nodded. In my gut, I trusted him. Maybe that was me being an idiot but I did trust him. For now at least.

-------------------------------------

Masterlist

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[shakespearesdrugdealer]

Just friends

Minors DNI.

Pairings: College AU. College!Gojo x fem!reader

Warnings: Smut (fingering), swearing, is fluff a warning?

A/N: Okayy, so this a college AU with a friends with benefits dynamic. I wanted to make this a slow burn so I'll see where it leads lol.

Enjoy!

He was kissing your neck and you were adjusting yourself under him to allow him to move further down. He didn’t smell like himself; his cologne was mixed with someone else’s. You were supposed to be okay with that though, because you guys were just friends after all. You were there for each other while doing homework, working on labs together, going bowling on the weekends, grabbing coffee and when the teenage hormonal urge came to indulge in each other’s body; well, a month ago you agreed to that too.

“Look, despite the movies, I think it could work,” Gojo proposed.

“What makes you think that?” you narrow your eyes at him from across the lab counter you guys were sitting at, trying to compile a report you messed up twice by now.

Chemistry was hard. But Gojo was making it harder for both of you right now by asking unnecessary questions to push a few boundaries in your friendship.

“The fact that you are pretty objective, and that we are both have needs,” he said, adding a playful drawl on the last word.

“No,” you pointed out firmly, hesitating to meet the eyes that were set at looking into yours. “You have needs, I on the other hand would like to finish this report and go to sleep.”

“See, that could easily be turned into a better end to your day if you go to sleep with me,” he countered, putting his hand on the calculator you were punching numbers into; forcing you to lift your head up and look at him with a frustrated but amused expression.

“Is this really the time to talk about this?” you huffed, trying to free your hand while trying hard and failing at controlling the heat spreading to your face.

“No time better than the present lovie.”

“Not your lovie,” you emphasized, sitting back onto your chair and giving up at the notion of finishing your lab. When Gojo is being stubborn about something, there were not a lot of ways to solve the problem but give in and listen; like right now, with his absurd idea.

But was it really absurd though? You guys have been friends for a good while now, 2 years to be exact. You liked how he could go on for ages talking about the ridiculous things he did at college that day and you wouldn’t mind listening because it allowed you to see the day outside of your own world. Maybe it was because your life lacked a little chaos and his lacked the calm and organization of yours; but you worked well with each other. He dragged you out of the dorm on days you got obsessed with completing your readings and you were grateful for the sun that you got. You also dragged him back into the dorm on nights you knew were meant for rest, or studying instead of getting wasted with the kids who had already completed their tests for that week.

“Look, all I’m saying is, let’s try it out, and if it fails…” he stretched out of his chair like he was doing some kind of tedious work (like the fucking report you guys were supposed to write). “Well, at least we will know where that road leads to.”

His standing figure made you look so small you wanted to punch him in the throat. But you also felt safe?

It’s not like you were completely against the idea. I mean, you knew him pretty well; you knew what kind of a person he was. You understood that he makes a great friend, but he would probably break your heart and chuck it in the bag of broken hearts he carries around with him. And let’s not lie, he’s hot. You’ve seen how his shirt rides up when he leans back against the pillows on your bed on the days he drops by your dorm to annoy you. You also hate how you can’t stop yourself from staring at how his eyes widen and sparkle when he finds something interesting in the material he’s reading when you guys are studying together. You knew there was a thin line between being his friend, working well together, him being so fucking attractive and you falling in love with him, God forbid.

Well, maybe you could walk that thin line. “If we fail, we never talk about it again okay?” you started, framing the rules of your relationship in your head.

“Yup,” he agreed, liking where this conversation was headed.

“There are going to be rules of course.”

“Mhhm.”

“No talk of this outside the two of us.” You look at him dead serious.

“Yep yep.”

“And you have to stop being so fucking annoying when we do what we do,” you added.

“Meh, no promises,” he shrugged.

“Okay, well, it looks like we’ve come to some kind of an agreement even though this report is not done,” you sighed closing your book at the realization that the time you signed up for the lab had elapsed.

“Hey,” Gojo said, clearing his throat. Was he nervous? You glanced at him while trying to gather your things into your bag.

“Do you wanna test the agreement?”

“What?” you pause your actions at the offer. “Now?”

“I mean, I see nothing stopping us,” he reasoned. “And we can finish the report at the dorm too.”

“How do you plan for these bribes to work with me?” you smile at his offer to work in exchange of doing the dirty.

“What can I say lovie, I’m a bit of a genius when it comes to being a slut.” Only Gojo could imbue so much confidence into being a slut.

“Again,” you said, “not your lovie.” You push your bag into his chest as a sign of agreement and head towards the lab door. He caught up with you in no time, cradling your bag in his arms and smiling stupidly wide like he won at an arcade game at the fair. You didn’t know if what was going to follow was a disaster or the start of something better than anything you two ever knew.

He didn’t even wait for you guys to settle into your room or talk about how your relationship was going to work before throwing your bag onto the bed and backing you up against your door and pressing his lips against yours to let you know how the next few hours of your day were going to go. And oh my god, they were going to go so fucking good.

“Is this okay?” he asked, pulling away from your lips and twisting the lock on your door with his free hand.

“Yeah,” you squeaked, embarrassed and a little confused at how quickly this day was taking a whole new turn.

“Wanna say that again?” he teased swiping his thumb across your cheek while tilting your head to look at you properly.

“Just-” you swallowed. You’ve never seen his eyes look like this, even after all this time with him. They had their usual playful glint in them, the kind that normally makes you want to shove him through a locker (not that you haven’t tried) but right now there was something more. Something that made you want to run but also give into his touch and the patterns he was drawing on the small of your back with his other hand. “Just…take it slow okay?” you ask, hoping he understood that you hadn’t done something like this in a while now.

He knew that though. You talked about your first times over a drunk Friday evening and that was when he figured you hadn’t done as much as him and you also figured that Gojo was a threat to womankind.

“Yeah, I know,” he replied, taking your hands into his and leading you towards the bed. His eyes never left yours and you weren’t done tasting his lips just yet, so you stare at them with unabashed desire. “Oh, my eyes are up here love,” he said, pausing his movements to take in this side of you he hadn’t seen before.

“Shut up,” you retort, a little annoyed at how quickly he had you feeling so hot and bothered. You wrap your arms around his neck and stand on your tippy-toes to pull him down to meet your lips as he groans into the kiss in surprise. You don’t know what it was that got into you, but you pushed him to walk to the edge of the bed as your tugged at the hem of his shirt to let him know you wanted it on the floor. He was breathing hard too by this point; his hand cupping your neck and the other finding its way under your shirt. He laughs at your attempt to lift his shirt and removes his hands from your body for a moment to take his shirt off. Your eyes widen at the view you were presented with. Your hands reach for his chest but he grabs your wrists, tilting his head in amusement. “Kinda unfair if yours doesn’t come off too no?”

And that’s how you found his hands slipping under your shirt and around your back, leaving goosebumps at his touch. He unhooked your bra and lifted the set of clothing from your body, leaving you hazy from all the kisses that he was planting along your jawline and neck. He pulled your hands that were stroking his chest to interlock with his fingers as he used your momentary confusion to push you onto your bed and hover over you in one clumsy but simultaneously smooth maneuver.

He was reveling in this side of you that you were showing. It was chaotic, it was vulnerable and most of all, it was so beautiful. His hands release yours as he finds interest in playing with your breasts. He takes hold of your left breast and squeezes it as you whine and twist your head into the pillows at his teasing and the lack of attention that was being paid to your areas down south. You pull at the white strands of his hair you had slid your fingers into and he groans into your skin making you shudder. He opens his lips to the side of your neck that you gave space to and bites down as a response to your own roughness. The moan that escapes your mouth makes you want to hide in embarrassment as he chuckles into the mark he was leaving.

Your chest was heaving, as your hands grab at the sheets next to you instead to find some kind of stability among the fireworks that his touch was leaving. “Gojo-” you started, lifting your head from the pillow, to see him smirking at you. He moves down towards your stomach and thighs, making sure to kiss the curves and edges and taking note of the areas he kissed and you moaned at. “I will kill you if you don’t stop teasing.” You drop back onto the pillow again, not being able to hold for too long as his fingers stroke your inner thighs, taking off the last article of clothing you had on.

He leans forward, looking at you with your eyes fluttering shut and fidgeting around his hold on you. “Aw, cute,” he says, stroking your thighs and brushing his fingertips around your clit, not touching it but making it more sensitive than you would have ever imagined. “You can still threaten me looking like this.” You push your head deeper into the pillows at the sensation of the butterfly kisses he was placing on your inner thighs and sucking at the sensitive skin to leave his marks yet again.

“I swear to God-” you plead, threading your hands into his hair again. “Patience, pretty,” he says, lifting his head from between your legs to allow his fingers to take their place and rub at your clit in tiny circles. You gasp and have the urge to shut your legs but he has one of his legs secured between yours and you really wanted him to keep going too. “Think you’re ready for me?” he asks, running his index and middle finger along the outer area of your slits.

you nod at him, tucking your bottom lip between your teeth. You were getting hazy from circles he was drawing on your clit with his middle finger and moving it down to tease your entrance.

“Words, love,” he says, shifting to lean above you and place a kiss to your lips and chest that was heaving roughly by now.

“I-I’m ready,” you softly reply, looking into his eyes and then at his smile that reminded you that he was your safety and also the person that was going to ruin in the next few minutes.

“Tell me to stop when you want to okay?” He assures you as he slides his fingers between your slits to feel your wetness.

“Mhmm,” is all you can say as you feel his middle finger play around your entrance before finding its way against your walls. You breathe sharply at the feeling of his finger pulling in and out slowly, to explore its way around you. But it was also making you so hot-headed as it hit all the right corners and spaces. He swallows your moans with his lips and tries to steady your body by sucking at your nipples. But it only made your head cloudier and you let go of any control of the sounds that were coming out of you.

Your back arches with an audible whimper escaping your chest at Gojo’s attempt to curl his finger against your walls and he smirks, knowing what he just did. He continues the curling motions and tests your limit by nudging a second finger at your entrance. You yelp at the tight feeling of your walls against his fingers. “Fuck,” you spread your legs wider as a sign of giving in to his movements completely. He was entranced by the pretty sounds coming out of you and the way your hips were moving up and down his fingers trying to chase the knot that was tightening at the bottom of your stomach.

He speeds up the movements of his fingers, moving in and out of you. You let out soft cries at how he wasn’t letting you get a moment of rest between the feeling of his mouth against the sensitive spots on your neck and breasts mixed with the madness that was occurring between your legs. “Gojo, I can’t-” you say in a shaky cry at the way your walls were tightening against his fingers. He pushes you further with his thumb rubbing faster against your clit and you just about lose it, your eyes rolling to the back of your head and a strangled moan leaving your lips

“Hey pretty girl, wanna let go for me?” he whispers as he looks at your desperate eyes. You nod feverishly as he continues his motions, and he hoists one of your legs further apart to rest on his lap. You feel the knot in your stomach getting tighter and the tingling on your clit getting borderline painful. You snap your palm on Gojo’s wrist trying to fight the feeling but he doesn’t relent. And with the next few motions of his fingers curling against you while he bit into your neck a little too rough, you let out a strangled shriek and arch your back as your walls pulsate around his fingers at your orgasm.

He drank in the sight of you panting and your legs shaking from the orgasm. Your eyes were pinched shut and one of your hands had the sheets tightly tucked into your fist and the other was squeezing his wrist that was still pumping his fingers in and out of you to help you ride out your orgasm. He leans forward, in awe and with sense of adoration.

“You good?” he kissed the corner of your mouth and brushed the stray pieces of hair on the sides of your face to place more chaste kisses across your cheeks and moving to your neck. You hiss as he takes his fingers out of you and you are given an apology as he muffles your complaints with his lips pressing against yours. Your eyes flutter open, glancing at Gojo’s now tight pants. You smirk and shift to balance your figure on your elbows to meet his eyes.

You nod at the bulge through his pants. “Do you wanna do something about that or…?” you question reaching out to place your hands against his chest, and push him into sitting back onto the bed as you straddle him.

“I mean…if you can take it,” he laughs, pressing his forehead against yours, and squeezing your hips.

God, this may be a huge mistake or one of the greatest things you guys stumbled upon with each other.

A/N: This is my first attempt at smut so help me oh lords of smut; I hope I didn’t it mess up lol. I also really like this college AU so maybe I’ll continue it, idk.

Alsoo, the header I used here was got from pinterest but if it has sources to someone here on Tumblr, I would love to credit <3